#but i feel like i would just be adding

[twistys]

meredith  +  the  plane  aftermath  ,  re  :  lexie  grey.

it  has  taken  me  a  long  time  (  over  a  year  at  this  point  )  to  properly  collect  my  thoughts  on  this  topic.  primarily  because  my  thoughts  on  how  meredith  copes  with  this  are  everchanging  &  as  a  result  ,  this  is  subject  to  change.  however  ,  one  thing  that  has  not  changed  is  that  this  all  boils  down  to  is  the  fact  meredith  compartmentalises.

meredith  was  the  first  out  of  the  plane  crash  victims  to  go  back  to  “normal”.  this  was  largely  due  to  the  fact  she  came  out  of  the  crash  with  minimal  injuries.  this  allowed  her  to  go  back  to  work  almost  immediately.  she  became  an  attending  while  derek  ,  cristina  ,  &  arizona  were  all  recovering.  this  does  not  mean  that  just  because  she  went  back  to  work  that  she  should  have  worked  ,  or  that  she  was  not  hurting.  but  burying  herself  in  her  work  ?  it  was  her  way  of  coping.  because  if  she  wasn’t  busy  ,  she  wouldn’t  be  distracted.  then  her  mind  would  go  back  to  it  all.

meredith  does  not  bring  up  lexie  casually  until  episode  9x05  ,  where  she  seemingly  accepts  that  lexie  is  dead.  just  because  she  does  accept  it  does  not  mean  she  is  healed.  it  is  a  step  towards  healing.  meredith  never  gets  over  lexie’s  death.  that  is  also  a  constant  in  her  life.

she  finds  herself  feeling  guilt  over  this  idea  that  she  wasn’t  there  for  lexie.  lexie  was  alive  when  meredith  woke  up  from  the  crash  &  meredith  went  to  find  derek.  but  when  meredith  comes  back  ,  lexie  has  already  died.  meredith  never  got  to  say  goodbye.  she  never  got  to  comfort  lexie  in  her  final  moments.  meredith  feels  so  guilty  that  it  keeps  her  up  at  night.  the  first  few  nights  after  the  crash  ,  meredith  had  dreams  of  lexie.  she  would  lose  sleep  &  instead  of  telling  anyone  ,  she  would  stay  up  or  go  back  to  the  hospital  to  work.  i  imagine  derek  talks  to  her  about  seeing  someone  (  outside  of  mandated  therapy  )  ,  but  after  meredith  completes  her  mandated  therapy  ,  she  does  not  return.

her  relationship  with  thatcher  further  sours  after  lexie’s  funeral.  this  was  confirmed  in  episode  15x11.  i  agree  with  this  sentiment.  thatcher  led  meredith  on  in  a  moment  of  vulnerability.  meredith  respected  that  he  lost  a  daughter  &  he  needed  to  grieve.  however  ,  meredith  needed  a  parent.

meredith  misses  lexie  everyday.  there  is  not  a  day  that  goes  by  where  meredith  doesn’t  miss  her.  but  there  is  a  lot  of  compartmentalising  when  it  comes  to  lexie’s  death.  she  saw  lexie  crushed  under  a  plane  &  it  is  the  last  thing  she  saw  of  her  sister.  she  tries  to  remember  the  lexie  before  the  crash  ,  though.  the  lexie  that  was  bright  &  sunny  ,  that  drinks  juice  boxes  ,  that  loved  zola  like  her  own  ...  the  lexie  who  taught  her  that  biological  family  can  be  more  than  just  anger  &  hurt.

she  cries  for  lexie.  a  lot.  

every  year  on  lexie’s  death  anniversary  ,  meredith  takes  the  day  off.  goes  to  her  grave  &  talks  to  her.  she’ll  usually  bring  lunch  --  one  of  lexie’s  favorite  meals.  she  stays  away  from  the  hospital  &  makes  sure  lexie  knows  that  meredith  is  always  thinking  about  her.

[mynnthia]

was talking with a friend about how some of dunmeshi fаndom misunderstands kabru's initial feelings towards laios.

to sum up kabru's situation via a self-contained modernized metaphor:

kabru is like a guy who lost his entire family in a highly traumatic car accident. years later he joins a discord server and takes note of laios, another server member who seems interesting, so they start chatting. then laios reveals his special interest and favorite movie of all time is David Cronenberg's Crash (1996), and invites kabru to go watch a demolition derby with him

[buggachat]

honestly just in general it's very exhausting to try to analyze media that is literally meant to be analyzed, only for the replies to be filled with people arguing not against your analysis, but against the premise that the media can be analyzed at all.

i don't even know what to say about it without starting to really betray my frustration, so i'll just settle with— just don't engage with analysis posts? I'm serious. if you're typing a response to a media analysis post, reread what you've written and ask yourself "is this comment/response against the very concept of analyzing the media at all?" and if the answer is yes then delete it all and go sit in the shame corner. throw your curtains away if you want to so bad and stop telling me that I'm not allowed to hum and haw at the fact mine are blue

[weewoow-20706030]

Jason and Tim: *literally the most traumatic experience known to man, one that changes how anyone would look at them (e.g. Jason digging himself out of his own grave or Tim blowing up the leagues bases)*

Dick *absolutely mortified*: and you didn't tell me earlier because...?

Jason/Tim: idk, it never came up.

Dick: that's something you bring up!

[the-shrimp-alchemist]

Anyone else think Ed and Ling should've been a little more. I dunno. Drenched in blood during this arc? :)c (for the sake of the blood showing up on their dark clothing let's just say there's So Much Of It)

I didn't draw this for October 3rd btw, but now's as good a day to post as any!

Bonus, by the time they emerge:

dramatic reveal ruined, more at 11

[gummi-ships]

Kingdom Hearts Dream Drop Distance - Traverse Town

[stairset]

I do think probably for me the biggest takeaway from both Mando season 3 and Ahsoka is that the Disney+ shows desperately need to abandon the stupid ass 8-episode format already cause both shows feel like they're trying to do so much and just don't have the time to properly flesh it all out which results in some great setups with some pretty underwhelming payoffs. And really this applies to like every streaming service period like at this point I'm just so fucking sick of TV seasons that are less than 10 episodes long. Like we seriously need to go back to the days when serialized action shows had 13 episodes per season at the bare minimum I'm not kidding.

[moeblob]

Happy Birthday to Ferdinand von Aegir!

I actually made 33 emotes, affectionately known as Aegirglyphics to some, for my own personal use on discord. However, I figure why not share some of them! They're free to use for discord servers/icons/pfps or whatever. However, my only request is Do NOT use them as subscriber emotes on Twitch. You can make them free follower emotes but you are not to make them locked behind a paywall.

[definitely-jax]

[bixels]

What did/do you like about Pharah?

Uh, gameplay-wise, I really love characters in shooters who rely on three-dimensional movement techs. Chaining together hover and jump to stay in the air for as long as possible and keep momentum is so satisfying, and picking enemies off from the sky made me feel like a bird of prey. I was a good Pharah main.

Story-wise, there unfortunately isn't much to canonically go off because Pharah is so underutilized and neglected. Her personality's pretty boilerplate "heroic hero" (she's literally inspired by Captain America).

But it's the crumbs/bits and pieces that I really latched onto. Pharah's a confirmed lesbian; her short story with Baptiste implies she harbors a crush on Mercy (fucking thank you.). She's biracial Egyptian/First Nations. She has major mommy issues, having grown up both admiring and resenting Ana. She's the bridge between Old Overwatch, inspired by the idealized heroes who surrounded her childhood, and New Overwatch. She's one of the only inter-generational characters in the cast; someone whose experiences span the gap, which is why I seriously believe Pharah would make a great main character.

There isn't much to go off of, though; she's a very uncomplicated character (she's a soldier for a private military corporation, lol.). But that just means she's a blank slate character, so I've seen fanfic writers run wild and create some really interesting takes on her. My favorite interpretation of her's a dense, herbo gym-bro type (a lot of her liens are about work outs, exercising, and playing sports) who's easily excitable under her seemingly self-serious, armored visage. We see how she tends to gloat and hype herself up when she's on a streak too, so Pharah definitely has a competitive and boastful side under her more professional and militant performance.

Now Mercy? Mercy is a real complex character.

[rozecrest]

i've been slowly making a letterboxd list of movies referenced on friends at the table episodes and it hit fifty movies today (many more to go-- i haven't nearly finished browsing through pzn and sgf for movie mentions) so i thought i would share it on here for those interested!

i would not have gotten this far without search at the table (fatt.fish) or transcripts at the table i am eternally grateful to them 🙏

[dstabilize]

doodlesss

[yuhi-san]

I’ve seen a few posts pointing out how stampede vash lacks the anger that 98 and especially trimax vash has. Which is true.

And it is important. Because vash isn’t the too morally strong or good or kind to be angry or whatever. Vash has a lot of rage about a lot of things. he chooses to be kind despite it rather than not being angry at all.

His sheer determination to not give into anger and choosing kindness over and over again is very important to who he is.

(personally I think that while tristamp vash went through a lot already too, he simply has not quite reached that point)

What I haven’t really seen are post pointing out that stampede vash, unlike 98 and trimax vash, does not cry.

Vash cries a lot. Some of it is for the comedy and because he is dramatic like that and also he isn’t above trying to get pity that way (with little success lol).

But he also cries a lot just… because. I don’t know how to explain it.

Like vash has no shame or inhibition to cry when that’s what he feels. Not gonna lie, I know trimax mostly from spoilers so far (shame on me) but especially in 98 vash cries very freely. He cries when he thinks he will have to watch that ex-mob boss or whatever being shot. Cries after killing, cries after monev kills all these people and he wants to shot him but wont. And so so many more.

Like that time he just suddenly drops his donuts and cries in the middle of the street.

Vash is friendly and sociable on a surface level but he has cut himself off from so much. Keeps so many things on the inside. Crying seems the one thing he doesn’t hold back on. Maybe his only genuine outlet for the pain.

Vash hides his scars, his pain and much more but he never hides his tears.

Vash, in 98 even says ‘is there something wrong with that?’ when the kids note that he is crying despite being an adult.

In contrast to that, stampede vash never really cries. He even states that he doesn’t deserve to.

We see him shed tears just once, at the very end when it becomes clear to him that he can’t save nai and that his brother and him have grown so far apart that he barely recognizes him anymore. He sheds silent tears for nai, for them, at what he certainly believed to be the very end.

Stampede vash is not only a lot more timid than his counterpart but seems overall more repressed and and emotionally dulled/exhausted

[cupidle]

zazie

[turtledotjpeg]

dumb.......but it appeared in my brain and i had to do it (ﾉ •_•)ﾉ

bonus: wip ft. even less hinged kurapika

[thatsgonnaleaveamark]

welp this didn't take me nearly as long as i expected it to lol, but here's a letterboxd list containing all movies from the @whumpapedia !