#but that's actually a fucking insane way to go about life so put the goddamn mask on in crowded places

[laurelwinchester]

so. my month from hell got worse. my grandfather died last night. he died of complications from covid.

put on a goddamn mask, people.

[chuluoyi]

only if you are up for a challenge. Naoya Zenin x f!reader in which he got her pregnant, then she left out of fear and he found her again and won't let her go :)))

when you loved me

- zen'in naoya x reader

you loved him... but you have had enough of the shit you've experienced—his arrogance, horrible family and another woman—and decided to leave him for the sake of yourself and your child

genre/warnings: angst to comfort, implied cheating, most likely ooc, honestly i almost made it a vs naoya fic with no consolation, happy ending aka naoya is decent

note: this ask... has been collecting dust in my askbox for about SIX MONTHS HAHAH, so sorry anon. i'll just leave it here and let it burn however just bc i don’t want to delete what i’ve written :’)

general masterlist

"How... how could you?"

Once, you thought, you were in love with Zen'in Naoya.

Well, you couldn't deny that he had personality flaws, but deep down, at one point in your life, you still believed that he too loved you.

You stared at him through tears brimming in your eyes, and he was just there, looking at the little being in your arms with a mix of shock and... something else you couldn't name. Dismay? Disappointment? Black rage?

"Go away, Naoya," you declared through your gritted teeth, pulling the baby in your arms even closer to you, as though fearing he might do something drastic. No way in hell would you let him after what he made you go through.

His eyes twitched as he tried to hold himself back from losing it. He took a few deep breathes in order to stay composed.

“Y/N, answer me,” he growled, still with the same condescending tone you remembered nine months ago, when you resolutely decided to leave him. “Is that baby mine?”

This was absolute madness. You had driven him insane. Naoya was certain he would go feral on you after you boldly left him without a trace, and when he found you, you were cradling this baby in your arms—which he was absolutely sure, enough to bet on his life, that the little thing was also his.

The woman he loves has given birth to his child.

You had imagined all sort of scenarios in which this very event would occur. This was one of them actually.

“No,” you firmly replied, gaze hardening. “Not yours. So kindly let yourself out of my house, Naoya.”

“Absolute bullshit!” he shouted and you flinched. His sudden rise of voice also woke the poor baby in your arms.

His heart hammered inside his chest. There were many things that made a mess of his head. You running away from him. The nights of madness he went through, wondering where you were and if you were alright. And now, the fact you had his baby without him ever knowing.

“Where were you? Why did you leave— you were having my—”

Fuck, he didn’t even know if he had a son or daughter.

You tried to console your child, now tears also streaming down your cheeks too. But it was more of frustration and anger rather than fear. “Can you blame me? Zen’in Naoya, you have made my life hell!”

“Hell?” It felt like an total insult to his pride. “How—!”

“You!” you screamed at his face. “I’ve had enough of your shit! And not to mention your father—that horrible drunkard who always looks down on me and treats me as if I were some gold digger! And also the whole of your goddamn, entitled clan—they always harass me right in front of my face!”

All of this stunned him on this place. Truth to be told, he knew a little to nothing at all about what his kin had done to you.

“I don’t need your family’s wealth! I can live on my own just fine even with your bastard!” Your tirade still hadn’t ended, but you had to put your baby on her cot first and dismiss her ever growing cries because you were tired of all of this. This life. This absolute nightmare that was caused by one fatal mistake of falling in love with Zen’in Naoya.

“But what the fuck? You’re asking why I left? How dare you ask me that after what you did!”

“What did I even do?!” His denial made a blood vessel about to burst inside your brain. “You never fucking told me what my father did! If only you did, I would have—”

“Look, you don’t even acknowledge it!” You were so tired of this. You wished you could die and just end all of this mental suffering. Why did this have to happen to you out of a billion people out there?

And yet, still, ultimately, you were happy with him. Those memories of the two of you together, just idyllically spending time together, or sometimes even playfully clashing opinions— to you, they were irreplaceable.

So, that's why...

Your heart shattered at the screeching cries of your baby. But you had to slam this in Naoya’s face.

“That was the last straw—seeing you with that fucking woman, you insufferable, demented, cheating bastard!”

That string of profanities you screamed at his face made Naoya finally lost it, as he gripped you tightly and his eyes flared with pure white-hot anger. “Say that again—say that again, you—!”

A toe-curling scream ripped out of your baby and you wrenched yourself out of his grasp through sheer will. Naoya was left reeling as he watched your horrified expression, as you plucked the baby into your arms again.

“Shh, shh,” you shushed your child amidst your own quivering lips. “Mama is here… Don’t cry…”

Right at that moment, it was as if something had pierced his chest and left a gaping hole. He really had a living baby. That baby was crying because of him.

The sting of the anger was still there, but now guilt started to overpower it as he regained his cool somewhat. “Is that a—” his breath hitched. He had to know. At the very, very least he had to know.

You didn’t immediately answer. You were still absolutely heartbroken by how it all turned out. But above all else, you could no longer deny him of his own child.

“A girl,” you sniffled.

A daughter. A daughter— in the one split second after knowing that, Naoya made the quickest decision of his life.

“Come back. Live with me,” he said, resolute. “You’re the mother of my child—I won’t let anyone lay their hand on you again. You have my word.”

Women are pain in the ass. That was what he used to think. Until you. Not when it's you. It astounded even himself how the sight of you like this was enough to drive knives into his chest.

“Look, that’s not it,” your tears were now falling free and fast, unable to hold it back longer. “How can you ask me that—when you went behind my back with another woman? Naoya, I love you—loved you. But isn’t this too cruel? How can you do this to me?”

“What woman are you talking about?” He tried to compose himself, but your accusation of him with someone whose existence he didn’t even know was getting in his nerves. “I have never been unfaithful to you! I know we don't always agree to things, but do you really think that low of me?”

“Evidently, I saw you with her. Your father made it a point that she’s your next plaything—or possibly even, fiancée!”

There was a memory that sprung into his head when you mentioned that. He recalled that vain, stupid woman, and he definitely remembered telling his father that he refused her. It wasn’t long before you disappeared.

Now everything clicked.

“Listen to me,” Naoya started, jaw clenching. “Whatever my father told you—those are all lies. I turned her down right there and then. I wouldn’t do that to you. You know that. You should have known that.”

Sobs wrecked your body and soul at this point. You knew where your place was. Zen’in Naoya was a man outside your league, his family made it so clear to you that you were nothing but dirt in their eyes. And perhaps that was why, back then, you chose to protect yourself and left him, believing he was capable of that too.

And now before you, you could see the man you loved once again.

“Come back to me.” His gaze burned you. “This time, for sure, I won’t let anyone touch you— I won’t let them even say a word about you! I will marry you, and we will raise our daughter together.”

“I… I don’t want to live there, Naoya…” you sobbed. You hated that place. Like hell would you have your pride stomped and deceived again.

“Alright, if that’s what you want. We won’t live there. You won’t have to see any of their faces again.”

Gazing into your face, marked by trails of tears, he finally, finally felt his heart break. And he thought, that in front of him now was the only woman who could upturn his whole trajectory.

“Just… come back. To me. I will take care of you. I swear it.”

[mountainsandmayhem]

BDSMaid - Chapter 3

Pairing: Millionaire!Joel Miller x Female!Reader

Rating: E, 18+, Minors dni

Series Summary: After recently graduating from university, your best friend offers you a job cleaning luxury homes for clients you’ll never know. It’s only temporary and a good way to save money for when you go back to get your law degree. That’s what you’re promised at least. Easy. Simple. Mundane. That is, until one of your clients is home and everything that you felt was missing in your life starts to fall into place. This goes against the NDA you signed and you could get fired. Or worse, you could fall in love.

Chapter Summary: You decide it's time to put yourself on Joel's radar.

CW: Age gap (Joel 45, Reader 22), dual POV. Specific warnings in small red below the cut, do not read to avoid spoilers.

WC: 10k. Sorry, grab a snack!

AN: I'm continuously surprised by the love, excitement and joy that this story brings anyone but me. That probably doesn't even make sense, I'm just lost for words, tbh. Forehead kisses to @mermaidgirl30, @littlevenicebitch69, @joelmillerisapunk, and @milla-frenchy for screaming with me or pre reading this for me. @lotusbxtch gets a forehead kiss and a tip of the nose kiss for deep dive beta reading this, she's solely responsible for every semi colon.

Series Masterlist || My Masterist

I no longer have a tag list, please follow @mountainsandmayhem-updates to be alerted for future chapters.

Content Warnings: Flirty, alcohol consumption, mentions of sexual acts, kissing, mutual pining, reader being pinned against a wall, sexual tension, touching. Reader does have some description so may be considered more of an OFC.

The week after Joel removed you from his club goes by in a well-scheduled blur. You work your usual three days, cleaning mansions of people who don’t tip as well as Mister Miller. You pour yourself over LSAT study guides, practicing insane logic questions. You enjoy a coffee date with Jamie who asks you what happened the night at the poker game. You tell her a practiced lie that feels like acid on your tongue as it leaves your lips. You hate lying to your friends, especially her. You can feel that lie sitting heavily on the top of your stomach the entire time you’re with her, but you simply cannot afford to get fired with three years of law school on the horizon. You spend an evening with your roommate, Odette, watching Netflix and eating dumplings from her favourite spot, the only spot in Austin that has those little white paper boxes with the red writing. 

If you decide not to lie to yourself, on top of everyone else, you also spend at least an hour a day watching videos of women tied up and dominated, thinking of Joel goddamn Miller the entire time. Since learning his full name, and the name of his club, the Google searches you swore you’d stop doing have been much more productive. You’ve found multiple blogs and Reddit posts, not just about kink, but also about Joel. It turns out that he’s well-known in the kink and BDSM communities around the world, but is essentially changing the face of kink in Austin. 

One night, you get lost in a Reddit wormhole of women in Texas, and one in Paris, who have been a submissive for a man that sounds a lot like Joel. They don’t actually mention him by name but there’s advice on what he likes and doesn’t like, and how he never actually has sex with any of his submissives. It also sounds like some of these women pay him to be their dom, and, based on the conversations in the comments of one thread, it seems like he has a few submissives at the moment, and majority of their interactions happen at the club. 

 The club. Fuck, Jamie wasn’t kidding when she said JMK was exclusive. Anyone can join, assuming you can pay the yearly membership fees that, according to Reddit, are around $80,000 per year. From the minimal, cryptic information you find, Joel Miller is the main owner and he has two business partners. One you assume is his brother that you served the other night, but the third you are unable to find any information about. 

Since everything you find online is up to interpretation, it’s hard to say what is and isn’t true. According to one disgruntled poster, once you become a member at JMKink, there are a lot of rules to follow. Everyone has to get tested monthly; it’s highly recommended that women are on birth control; and even if you’re married to the guest you bring, men must wear condoms. You can’t just bring anyone in with you: every member and their guest has an app, and the only way to get that app is from a QR code and an assigned activation code. According to another poster, the app is full of waivers and consent forms. You can’t stop the shy smile that crosses your face when you remember how concerned Joel was with your consent the first time you met. 

The Monday before your usual every-other-Tuesday shift at Joel’s, you find a blog post about becoming a submissive, and it’s like it was written just for you. The writer explains how she had a hard time shutting off her brain and how, by the end of the day, she was so exhausted from making decisions that all she wanted was someone to tell her what to do for once. This led to her and her husband exploring a sub/dom partnership. Now, she feels lighter and freer; they’ve both discovered new ways to get pleasure outside of the idea of sex that society feeds us. Being a submissive isn’t always about orgasms or pleasure; it’s helped her build confidence, and she’s found that as they progress, that little voice that tells her she isn't good enough has stopped being so loud. 

After reading through the post a few times, you shut your rose gold laptop and stare at the wall behind your desk. You feel seen, heard even though you didn’t speak. At first, you found yourself feeling ashamed of getting off to these videos, like there was something wrong with you for being turned on by it, but it’s really that ability to let go of control that you crave, the feeling of someone else making the decisions for once. You want that, but more so, you think you need that, and badly.

As a firm believer of ‘everything happens for a reason,’ it all comes together for you. You aren’t even nervous as the thought consumes you. If Joel shows up at his house, tomorrow I’m going to ask him to teach me. 

On Tuesday, you do as you always do, following Joel’s instructions to a tee while listening to a podcast. However, today you only wear one AirPod in hopes of hearing that familiar and comforting engine rev that signals him either coming or going. Every creak or pop of the house causes your heart to flutter, but it’s never him. Much to your chagrin, Joel doesn’t come home. 

Inside the envelope is that expensive matte black paper again, ‘Thanks -JM’ neatly written along it. 

Great, you think to yourself sarcastically, we are on initial terms again. 

Twelve hundred dollars is tucked into the envelope this time, you roll your eyes after thumbing the crisp green bills. The first tip you ever got from him felt sincere, but after walking in on him, and everything since then, it’s feeling more and more like apology money. You shouldn’t complain; people would kill to make this kind of money, but everything would be so much easier if he’d just fucking talk to you.

Your fingers run along the thick, rich paper that he uses as company letterhead. You can’t explain it, but the paper feels like Joel. It’s rough and thick, yet has a vulnerability to it, like you could easily destroy it with just a pinch of your fingers and a flick of your wrist. Your mind flashes back to his club the other night. He was literally begging you to leave, you can still hear it, the pleading in his voice as he said, “I’m sorry. I just can’t have you here, this is on me”. Your fingers trail across the golden ink of his neat handwriting and then open the paper the rest of the way. At the very bottom of the page, in shiny black print similar to the JMK logo at the top, is a phone number. Your heart slams against your ribcage as your eyes scan across the numbers.

  When you get home, you unfold the note on your kitchen counter and pace the three or four steps it takes to walk the length of your small kitchen, never taking your eyes off the paper, looking at it like it’s a live bomb or like it’s going to disappear if you let it out of your sight. This is it: you could call the office, make an appointment or something. You’d probably have to lie, but you just need to see him; you need to make a case for yourself. Your stomach lurches, throat tightening at the thought of being in the club with him again. You open the freezer and grab the bottle of tequila, taking a big swig right from the bottle. It’s a cold burn and you clench your eyes as you swallow it down. Your body shivers involuntarily.  

You dial before you can talk yourself out of it and before you know it you have an appointment under a fake name to speak to Joel tomorrow afternoon before your study group meets. You take two more large gulps of tequila after hanging up the phone. 

Fuck, this is really happening. You take another large sip of the frozen tequila for good measure, your nose scrunching up at the taste. 

Joel’s office isn’t attached to the club, it’s in a smaller building across the street and that has seemed to tamp some of the nerves that are vibrating your very core. Still, you can stop from nervously smoothing the wrinkles that have formed on the short, flowing skirt of your white sundress as you sit on the red velvet couch across from Joel’s receptionist. She is a small woman with a chin length bob, she’s probably in her late fifties and you wonder if her kids or grandkids know that she works for the owner of a kink club, or maybe she’s part of the community too. You’ve done copious amounts of research; kink isn’t just for young people, and you suppose Joel isn’t exactly young either. For all you know, she very well could be a dominatrix in her spare time. 

She says your fake name in a soothing tone as she stands and walks towards the tall black door, pulling it open effortlessly. “Go on in, sweetheart. Joel’s ready for you.”

You smile at her sweetly, tucking your hair behind your ear nervously as you walk over the threshold to try to convince the millionaire whose home you clean to dominate you. The air in his large, bright office feels heavy and thick. Blood rushes through your ears as he looks up at you from his seat. He slips off his 1950’s style black horn rimmed glasses and places them on his desk. A muscle in his jaw ticks as he assesses you. Your heart lurches, knees trembling as you take a few nervous steps towards his desk. As his eyes meet yours you feel it again, that exposed and naked feeling that only his gaze seems to be able to cast. Maybe you shouldn’t have worn such a short dress, but it’s an unseasonably warm March day and even before leaving your apartment you were sweating in a mix of nervousness and excitement. 

You see his lips move, but you can’t hear him over the pounding of your heart. You stop just past the door, then hear it click shut behind you. Joel’s silky lips move again and this time you hear your name followed by a calm, “What’re you doin’ here?”

The words come out before you even think about them, you practically yell them at him, “I want you to teach me.”

His hand waves to the chairs across his desk. When you don’t move he harshly says, “Sit.”

You rush across his expansive office, the plush carpet feels luxurious under your shoes. When you reach the black leather chair you sit on the very edge of the seat, your knee nervously bouncing up and down in time with your heart.

“You want me to do what?” He asks hesitantly, leaning forward in his chair. He looks absolutely beautiful in the late afternoon sun - orange hues reflecting off his tanned skin, the few greys along his temples glistening like the moon on the ocean. He’s in a black dress shirt again, his sleeves rolled to his elbows. You noticed today that he’s wearing a black watch and a gold ring on his right ring finger. Between his accessories and the veins that line his toned forearms your mouth goes dry.

“I - umm, I want you to teach me.”

The last word has barely passed your lips when he scoffs out, “No.”

Your face falls, “Joel, please. I’ve been doing research and I’ve decided that, well, that I want to be…that.”

He places his large palms on the desk, the square black diamond in his ring glittering in the sun, and pushes himself up. You crane your neck to look at him as he slips his hands into his pockets, his eyes already locked on yours. His intense eye contact wraps you up in a weighted blanket of safety and comfort, which is a dangerous and vulnerable place, a place that has the ability to rip you in half, much like you could do with that company letterhead he left you. He walks slowly to the other side of his desk. Once in front of you, he leans back onto it, keeping his hands in the pockets of his perfectly tailored black dress pants. 

“You can’t even say it.” He challenges. 

You furrow your brows, ready to confront him like you always seem to do. In the few interactions you’ve had with Joel, more often than not, it’s been him trying to tell you what to do, you fighting him over it, and then him ultimately winning. It’s infuriating, but not this time. No, this time you’re going to win. You have valid reasons to want this, and they’re all backed up by your research. You are leaving this office as his submissive. 

“I can too!” 

He shrugs his broad shoulders nonchalantly, “Say it then. You wanna learn how to do what, sweetheart?” 

You sit up tall on the edge of the chair, crossing your arms under your breasts, praying your cheeks don’t flush as you finally admit it out loud. “I want to learn how to be a submissive.”

“No.” One of his meaty hands comes out of his pocket, waving you off as he says it again.

“Please!” You plead, “I want to learn how to be a sub.” 

Joel actually squirms at the sound of you being so needy. He lets out a harsh ‘fuck’ under his breath and then whispers your name, “I can’t do this with you.”

Got him, you think to yourself, failing to fight the smirk as you lower your voice and sweetly beg, “Please, Mister Miller?” 

Joel ‘Your-Consent-is-Most-Important’ Miller is not a small man: his broad shoulders take up almost an entire door frame and he’s easily nearing six foot four, but at the sound of you calling him the one name he’s asked you not to, he moves faster than your brain can comprehend. You gasp as he lunges towards you, his hands landing on the arms of the chair, his wide shoulders pushing you back as he cages you in. Your exposed back hits the back of the chair, your short skirt riding up your thighs slightly. He is practically on top of you and for a second you can imagine that this is what having sex with him would look like. His knuckles blanch from gripping the arms of the chair so tightly, his eyes are practically black, and that familiar flush he gets when you challenge him paints his neck and cheeks.

His voice is deeper, thick with arousal, rattling your bones as he speaks slowly, “I said not to call me that. You can’t even…You can’t.” He shuts his eyes and takes a slow breath in through his nose. His tone softens as he opens his eyes, “No, I ain’t doin’ this with you, sweet girl.” 

You practically writhe in your chair. Sweet girl. He’s terrifying and commanding and so fucking beautiful like this. He obviously has a soft spot for when you beg, so you soften your eyes and stick out your velvety smooth bottom lip enticingly before whispering, “Please, Joel.” 

He lets out a groan as he pushes himself off the chair and walks towards the large wall of windows behind his desk, his hands resting on his tapered waist. He avoids your gaze as you sit up, squeezing your thighs together tightly to calm the need at your core. “Lemme set ya up with someone else. My brother Tommy. You were gettin’ him a drink at that poker game.”

“I remember,” you mumble, looking down at your hands like you always do when your lack of confidence gets the best of you. You can’t let that self-doubt creep in now, not when you’re this close. You look back towards his broad back. “But I really don’t want anyone else.”

“Why?” He spins towards you, the lighting behind him gives him an almost ethereal glow. There’s absolutely no denying it, Joel Miller is the most gorgeous man you’ve ever seen.

You tuck your hands under your legs, simply stating, “I trust you.”

“You don’t even know me. I could be a horrible guy.”

You let out a sad laugh, shaking your head at him. He’s right, you don’t know him, but you have a feeling about him and you consider yourself pretty good at reading people. “You’ve never given me reason to think I couldn’t trust you. Even that first day. You were so calm and apologetic.”

Joel presses his lips in a thin line, eyes raking over you. You subconsciously slip your bottom lip between your teeth, and a muscle in his jaw flexes. “How old are you?”

“Twenty two,” you immediately regret lying; the avenue of trust is of utmost importance between a submissive and their dominant, so you quickly add, “Almost, I turn twenty two on Friday.”

 “I can’t do this.” He croaks and you can’t help but feel a little bad. You’ve put him in an uncomfortable position and his voice sounds defeated. 

“Please. I always felt I needed more but,” you stand up and take a few slow steps in his direction. “But…I didn’t know what more was and I - I think it’s this.” You audibly swallow pleading, “Please. I need you to help me. I want you to help me. Teach me.” 

He holds his hands up and steps back as you inch closer. A silent call that signals you to stop or that he doesn’t trust himself, not here, not with you. “Jus’ let me set ya up with Tommy. You’re his type.” 

Your heart sinks and an acidic taste lines your tongue. Of course. You aren’t that tall, slender icy blonde girl he had strapped to his desk. No, you have curves, and stretch marks along your hips, your boobs are a B cup on a good day. He can get whatever woman he wants, why would it be you? You look down at your hands, pushing back the nonexistent cuticle on your right thumb. This nervous habit of yours used to drive your mom crazy, ‘you’re going to have no skin left soon’ she’d lecture, but you can’t help it. The immediate result of the nail bed looking clean and perfect is like a dopamine hit. It leaves you with a feeling of accomplishment. The problem is, the initial confidence you had about this decision on Monday night has dwindled and you’ve been so anxious about this meeting that every single finger has a nicely pushed back cuticle. 

It’s silent in the room for a while, you shut your eyes as you sheepishly ask,  “Am I not attractive enough for you?”

“No!” He says insistently and without hesitation. His hand runs through his beard, a faint scratching sound fills the room drawing your eyes open and away from the skin of your thumb. As they land back on him you wonder what his patchy facial hair would feel like between your legs or along the soft skin of your stomach as he kissed you. His voice softens, “That’s not it. I just - I’m sorry. I jus’ can’t do this, sweetheart.”

You feel your chance to become the woman you want to be slipping through your fingers. Your plan is failing and for once in your life you don’t have a Plan B, this is the only plan that makes sense to you. Sadness creeps into your throat, “Why?” 

“‘S not a good idea, sweet girl,” he answers, his soft brown sugar flecked eyes reaching out to yours. 

His face and voice seem to be at war with his words. He’s saying no, but there’s a sadness in his eyes and a caring undertone to his voice. You’re not sure how you know it, but him calling you sweet girl means something to him. “Because I’m not your type?”

He shakes his head, that same curl falling into his eyes as it did in his foyer the other day. “That’s the problem, you’re exactly my type.”

Hearing that you’re this beautiful man's type should feel like you’ve won the lottery, but the way his shoulders slump as he says it only builds that lump in your throat. As you swallow the sadness down, his eyes travel to your neck, watching as the muscles flex and relax with the motion. “I - then why?”

He lets out a long breath and as he walks to the door he says, “I ain’t havin’ this conversation. I said no. And someone who is cut out to be a submissive would just take that answer for what it is.” 

“You’ve made it clear that I’m not a submissive,” you counter and walk towards the door. He cracks the door open and you step in close to him, unconsciously taking in his leather and ash scent before adding, “Have a nice night, Mister Miller.” 

Joel

The door feels like a feather behind his hand as he slams it shut - your body, warm and already vibrating, trapped between him and the solid piece of wood that separates the two of you from his receptionist. He made himself a promise in his rear view mirror the other week; he had to cut this off, create distance. He needed you to be just his house cleaner. Because everytime he looks into your eyes he feels the same way he felt at seventeen when he met Tiffany in that garage. Everything about you oozes sweetness and innocence, his sweetheart, his sweet girl. He didn’t think he was capable of feeling that way again. And he definitely should not feel this way for someone who is younger than his own daughter.

His large frame looms behind you, forcing your chest and forehead to rest against the door. He uses his foot to spread your legs wide. A breathy gasp passes your lips as your hands scramble for purchase against the wood grain of the door. He keeps pushing your legs apart, wide enough for your short white skirt to ride up your creamy thighs. Thighs he’s imagined wrapped tightly around his head as he makes you scream. 

Joel takes a small step forward, caging you completely, making it so you’re completely at his mercy. He can smell the sweet scent of your arousal growing between your thighs; he knows if he reaches a calloused finger to the gusset of your panties they’d be soaked through. His cock is hard as steel, pressing against the zipper of his pants and the small of your back. You’re practically panting and he fights to keep his breathing steady when really he wants to mirror the quick, uneven pace of your breath. This is much more serious and intimate than when he had you trapped in the chair. This is dangerous. This could lead to more.   

His strong fingers wrap around your dainty wrists. He loves the way you don’t fight him as he pulls them above your head, gathering both your wrists in one of his hands, pinning them to the door roughly. His free hand draws a slow line down your arm, then along the sensitive skin of your neck, and down your spine. Goosebumps break out over your skin and you instinctively arch your back into him, a desperate whine passes from your lips between laboured breaths, and that sound nearly buckles his knees.  

His lips come to the shell of your ear, his beard tickling you as he speaks in a slow and commanding tone. “Do you feel what you do to me when you call me that. I’ve asked you not to. Multiple times.”

Your mint and lavender scented shampoo fills his nose as he nudges at you to tilt open your throat to him. He revels in how easily you oblige, cocking your head to the side like the good little girl he knows you are. He continues, lips just a hair away from your pulse point; he’s sure if he pressed his lips to it he’d feel how hard your heart is racing. “But I don’t want you to stop. In fact, I fucking love that you haven’t stopped.” 

Your soft skin is warm against his rough fingers as they continue their trail down your body, running over the firm globe of one of your ass cheeks. He sucks his bottom lip between his teeth and bites down hard, distracting himself from the urge to spank you for calling him Mister Miller yet again. Finally, his fingers find a home on one of your thighs. He brushes lightly against your soft inner thighs, small little touches jumping from one leg to the other. The little involuntary twitches of your body and the needy little gasps of air you suck through your teeth has his cock straining painfully against his zipper. He’s aching for you in a way he hasn’t felt for years. 

“You infuriate me with your insubordination and it makes me weak,” he mutters. “Makes me absolutely insane. I can’t stop fucking thinking about what’s underneath those clothes, and after seeing your perfect breasts and your little pink nipples… fuuuuck, baby. All I can think about is how good they’d look with my handprints tattooed on them after I slap them while you orgasm. Can’t stop thinking about how wet your little pussy must get. How tight she would be around my fingers as I claim her as mine. How fucking delicious she must taste. How goddamn sexy your cries of pain and pleasure would sound.”

Your whole body shudders against his. He knows exactly what he’s doing to you and he knows he needs to stop before he crosses a line, but the way your body responds to him is precisely how he likes it: pliant and ready. His mind reels with all the naughty things he’d like to do to you. If he reaches just a little bit higher he could finally know how you sound when you come, how silky your cunt is, how you taste. He runs the tip of his hooked nose down your neck, the light citrus of your perfume replacing the scent of your shampoo. 

“That what you wanna hear?” Joel continues. “How fucking weak you make me? How desperate? I can’t do this because once I start…I ain’t gonna be able to let you go. Ain’t gonna be able to stop. Never gonna be able to have any other little play thing. It’s just you, sweet girl, only you. If I start this, this is it for me.”

Joel releases your wrists with a growl and walks away, carding his fingers through his curls and looking out at the cityscape as the sun begins to dip behind the tall buildings. He doesn’t look back, he can’t look back or he’ll fucking crack. He’ll haul you over his shoulder and take you into his club. He’ll show you everything right now and he won’t stop. His eyes flutter closed as he takes controlled breaths to slow his heart rate, the unmistakable sound of his office door opening and closing behind him. 

You 

You yank the door open and walk as fast as your legs will take you, your mind swirling, every emotion trying to win for first place. You’re painfully turned on, you can feel how soaked your panties are. It’s just you, sweet girl, only you. It’s like it’s been carved into your brain. Only you. You jam at the elevator close button as your lungs scream for fresh air, and as you step out into the warm spring night you suck in breath for what feels like the first time since you made this appointment last night. 

Your phone vibrates in the small purse you have across your body. He doesn’t have your number, you remind yourself as you reach for your phone. Jamie’s name across your slightly cracked screen. “Hey!” 

“Are you ok?” her voice is thick with concern.

Your chest feels tight, “Ya, why?”

“You sound like you're out of breath.” 

You laugh a little, “Oh. I was..” fuck, what was I doing. “I mean I am walking. Like on a walk.” 

Even a toddler wouldn’t be convinced by your lie, and Jamie isn’t either as she gasps loudly on the other end before whispering, “Were you having sex?”

“No! God no!” Your clit twitches at the thought of how close Joel was today. “I’m on the street, can’t you hear the cars.” 

“Ok. You do need some sex though,” she laughs. 

“Jamie,” you sigh, “I have to get to a study group. What’s up?” 

She giggles devilishly. “Wellll - It’s your birthday weekend. I want to throw you a party at this really amazing club on Friday.”

“Umm, ya. Sure. Nothing too crazy though, right?” 

“Promise you can keep your top on this time, prude.” She says teasingly and you laugh. “It’s called Mystique. The owner is an old family friend and she gave us a sweet VIP booth and bottle service, all completely free!”

You slide your key into the door of your SUV to unlock it, “Ok. Let’s do it.”

“Good, because I already invited the girls.” You sigh and your phone buzzes in your ear as Jamie’s computer dings on the other end. “Oh, weird. Your regular every other Tuesday clean just requested for you to go on Friday. Weren’t you just there yesterday?” 

Joel. You say dreamily in your mind. 

“That’s shitty,” Jamie continues, “That’s your birthday. The shift is only 4 hours, but I can offer it to someone else if you want.” 

“No!” It comes out too eager and you remind yourself to chill the fuck out as you put her on speaker phone and open the app. “I mean, no, that’s ok. I need the money and my calendar shows 11 to 3, lots of time to get ready!” 

“Text me when you’re done with your study group and we’ll hammer out the details for Friday night. We didn’t get to celebrate you turning twenty one with your insane schedule -”

“Hey!” You exclaim, pretending to be hurt.

“Ya ya, I know,” her voice an amused sarcasm as she continues, “The master plan to graduate early. Which you did. So can we please make this the best celebration yet?” Even without being able to see your best friend you know she’s dancing excitedly on the balls of her feet while giving big green doe eyes. 

Friday rolls around quickly, and you aren’t sure what you’re looking forward to more; a much needed night out with your girlfriends or the possibility of Joel being home today. You’ve tried not to think about how his body felt against yours, but every few hours you found yourself with your hand between your legs, rubbing tight little circles on your clit until you came to thoughts of him, whispering Mister Miller like a church prayer.  

Pulling up to his house today feels strange. He requested an extra clean this week just minutes after you asked him to teach you how to sub and after finding out that your birthday was today. You haul your stuff into his house, letting out a frustrated sigh when you find it quiet and empty. You click open your app and he’s asking you to dust and vacuum the basement, as well as wipe out the fridge. You look down at the app confused. He’s never asked you to clean the basement, and the fridge? He doesn’t cook. The eleven thousand dollar fridge is basically just a decoration to fill a gap in the countertops. 

You pop in your airpods and head downstairs. The cozy white carpet of the stairs feels like plush clouds under your Keds. As you round the corner of the stairs you see everything that makes someone's house a home. So this is where he keeps it all, you think to yourself. 

The short hallway from the stairs to the large open concept basement is covered in photos of Joel at all stages of his life. The first picture that catches your eye is a teenage baby faced Joel and a beautiful young woman sitting on a hospital bed, she’s smiling at the camera as Joel looks down at the tiny bundle of pink blankets in her arms. He looks so happy and soft, and it ignites a small flame of jealousy. Not at the woman, but at the happy little family.

As your eyes scan all the pictures you see that baby at all ages. There’s a picture of her holding a trophy as big as her with little cleats and shin guards on. In another, she and Joel are holding a big fish, her toothless smile bright and brilliant, while something in Joel’s eyes looks sad even though his plush lips are curved up in a sexy smile. 

Another picture is of the little girl sitting on her mom’s lap; the woman doesn’t seem as vibrant in this picture. The next one to catch your eye is her holding a cupcake with a candle in the shape of the number sixteen, then him in a pressed black suit and her in her high school cap and gown. The last picture is similar, except it’s a college graduation photo. 

As you peel yourself away from all the pictures you haven’t managed to look at yet, you face the main living area, a large open concept space. There’s a cozy grey sectional facing the big screen TV, shelves of DVDs surround it and you can only imagine all the movie nights the two of them had down here. There's a pool table along the far back right side of the room and to the left are a bunch of guitars, both acoustic and electric, hanging on the wall. You walk towards the guitars, there’s a stool and a small table beside the amp. An open notebook with lyrics lays on the table and as tempting as it is to read it, you look away. This space is who Joel is and he’s obviously trusting or testing you by sending you down here. He did tell you that you didn’t know him, and that he could be a bad guy, but everything here screams wholesome family man. 

You dust and vacuum, then fluff the couch cushions and fold the blankets nicely. There’s an empty glass on the side table, so you grab that and wash it at the small wet bar before placing it with the other glasses. You take one last longing look at the notebook, it’s tempting but decide you are right to not read it. It’s none of your business what he writes and sings about. You picture him there, dressed casually in sweat pants and t-shirt, his large fingers plucking with a practiced finesse at the strings, you wrapped in a blanket, sitting on the floor with a cup of coffee and a book. The two of you being independently together on a Sunday morning. 

Thoughts of the two of you like that are dangerous; being his submissive isn’t being his girlfriend. You’ve been very good at compartmentalizing, mostly as a coping mechanism to your past, so you find a metaphorical little box in the back of your mind to stuff all those feelings and thoughts into. As you gather your cleaning supplies, you take one last look around. maybe this was his way of showing you that you can’t have a future with him, that he’s done with the kids-and-marriage part of his life. None of that matters to you; you don’t want kids and marriage, you just want a partnership, and the support and comfort that comes with it. You want to become a lawyer, and eventually a judge, and one day sit on the supreme court and defend everyone's civil and human rights. That’s the goal, the only goal.  

From this point on, any feelings for Joel Miller go in that box. If he ever changes his mind, he is my dominant and nothing else. You push the lid on the feelings box and run through your life plan as you head up the stairs. Law school and lawyer, then a relationship before judge and supreme court. That’s the plan, it’s always been the plan.

Once you’re in the kitchen, you pop open the fridge to see a single red rose. You lose a fighting battle with your face, smiling huge from ear to ear. You grab it and close the now empty fridge, bringing the rose to your nose to breathe in the sweet and powdery scent. The black and red envelope sits on the shiny marble countertop. You place the rose down and pop open the envelope. You pull out fifteen hundred dollars and a black business card. Your brows knit together as you inspect the card, flipping it over. A QR code for the JMK app, an activation code, and a note that says “Happy Birthday, sweetheart.” 

You practically rip your phone from your back pocket and scan the QR code. You dance nervously on the balls of your feet as the app downloads. With shaky fingers you create a username and password, then type in the activation code. A bunch of permissions pop up, and while the baby lawyer inside of you screams that you need to read them, you’re too eager, so you hastily click accept on all of them. A profile with your newly appointed username splays across the screen. Right below your name it says “Beginner Submissive” and you roll your eyes. You upload the hottest selfie you can find of yourself to be your profile picture, smirking at what you imagine Joel’s reaction will be when he sees you in that tight fitting gold dress, a picture Jamie took of you on New Year’s Eve. 

On the top right of your screen are 3 little lines, you open the menu and have two options. ‘Assigned Dominant’ and ‘Limits and Waivers’. You are eager to fill out whatever Joel wants on this app, but none of this will feel real to you until you see his name as your Dom. You giggle as you click the first menu. Holy shit, you think as the new window loads, this is going to happen, he’s going to do it. 

Your heart freezes in your chest, and every ounce of excitement and happiness drains from you as you read ‘Assigned Dominant: Tommy Miller’.

When you get home, you open your JMK app again, looking at the assigned dominant screen in hopes you made a mistake. But there it is, clear as day, ‘Tommy Miller’. You lock your phone in frustration and toss it onto your unmade bed. Why would he do this? You’re sure that everything in the limits and waivers menu would have been a yes if Joel was your dom. But Tommy? Not that there’s anything physically wrong with Tommy. He’s definitely attractive, but he’s not Joel and you thought you made that perfectly clear. 

After you shower you've decided you’ve cooled off enough to continue in the app. Tommy is still not Joel, but you want this for yourself, right? And it’s not about pleasure or attraction, it’s about the escape, and more importantly, it’s about having someone to push you and help you grow.    

You click the ‘Limits and Waivers’ menu, a whole quiz comes up where you can rate your interest in different sexual and non sexual acts on a scale of one to five, and secondary checkmark if you’ve already done those things. You scroll through the list, this would be easy with Joel, all fives, all ‘highly interested’, or so you think. As you scroll through the list you get some real fetish level stuff - diapers, feet, scat play, being hung from hooks. You know enough not to kink shame anyone, but none of that interests you. As such, you rank them as a one, not at all interested.

You scroll back up to fill in all the stuff you’re more interested in. 

Spanking, five. 

Whips and Crops, five. 

Paddles, five. 

Nipple Clamps, five, fucking five hundred at this point. 

Bondage, another five hundred. Vibrators, five. 

Butt Plug, three - ya, that one surprised even yourself, but it’s Tommy, not Joel. 

The little box to click if you’ve done those things remains unchecked. You aren’t a virgin, but the small handful of college boys you’ve entertained had the same two or three moves, all of which left you unsatisfied. 

Odette bangs on your door, and you jump as your phone goes flying from your hand as she barges in. “Let’s get ready! Repeat twenty one, baby!”

You scramble off your bed to grab your phone before she does, one of your hands in a death grip on your towel, “Fuck, you scared the shit outta me.”

“Oh god, you were watching porn again weren’t you?” She laughs as your cheeks flush crimson. She wanders to your closet and opens the doors, “We gotta find you something real hot for tonight, you need to get laid.”

“Yeah yeah yeah,” you sing nonchalantly, wandering to your vanity to run a brush through your wet hair.

A few hours later and you’re all ready to go. Jamie and Laren came over to pre-drink and do their hair and make up. The four of you blasted nineties Shania Twain while drinking rosé and doing shots of cheap tequila. You pick a floor length black dress with a slit that goes almost to your hip and drips low between your breasts and leaves your back bare. You leave your hair down, curling it loosely before applying minimal makeup, flirty false lashes and a vibrant matte red lipstick. The packaging says that it's guaranteed not to smudge for up to twelve hours. 

“We’ll test that tonight on drinks and men,” Laren says as she steals it from your hand and puts it on her full, pouty lips.

Jamie surprises you with a limo. Before getting in you swipe your JMK app open and save your half-finished preferences. Tonight is not about Joel or Tommy; tonight is about you, and you deserve to be celebrated.

The table Jamie managed to secure for your birthday is perfect. You’re just off the dance floor, but raised up so that you can see the entire club. The music is loud and the room is dark, dimly lit with light pinks and purples. As you settle into the booth a young icy haired blonde girl in small black shorts and a lacy bra wanders in. “Hey babes! I’m Jade, let’s get these bottles going! Here’s the menu.”

Her eyes fall to you as she hands the bottle service menu and you both freeze. It’s her, the girl from Joel’s desk. The thump of the music fades and all you can hear is her moans and cries, the squelching of her pussy as Joel finger fucked her hard and deep. Shit, fuck, why me. She smiles at you, “Oh hey! Good to see you again.”

A chorus of, ‘again?’ and ‘how do you know each other?’ comes from your friends, all of their wide eyes staring at you.

“We don’t really,” you rush. “Just a mutual acquaintance really.”

Luckily, she gets the hint and just nods along. “What are we getting to drink ladies? I’ve heard it’s on the house so pick something expensive!”

You pick a bottle of Clase Azul tequila, Jade saying she can make different cocktails with it so you’re not all just doing shots. After a few rounds you find yourself alone in the booth while your friends go to the bathroom. Jade sits on the black leather seat beside you. 

“Look, I just want to say that I’m sorry for what you saw the other week. Joel sort of forbade me from seeking you out, but if you’re in my section at the club I work at then I’m not really breaking any rules.” She’s even more beautiful up close, no fucking wonder Joel wants to give you to Tommy. It’s just you, sweet girl, only you. But you see it now, why he’d pass you along. You can’t compete with a woman like her, and from the sounds of it Joel has more than one gorgeous, tall, slender blonde at his beck and call. 

“No, it’s ok. I’m actually learning to be a sub soon.” You smile at her, trying to tamp down the jealousy that’s threatening to choke you.

“No way! Joel is amazing, I only see him like once a month now but you’re going to love it.” Suddenly your entire body feels like an open wound, and the lime and salt left on your hands from tequila shots burns through you. The back of your eyes burn, frustration and jealousy don’t mix well with Rosé and tequila. You blink a few times to stop the tears. 

“He actually set me up with Tommy,” you croak, “Said I’m more his type.”

Just as she opens her perfect pink lips you hear the unmistakable opening to your all time favourite Shania Twain song, and as if your friends appeared from thin air the four of you yell, “Let’s go girls!”. The icy blonde pats the top of the table in your booth with one hand and holds her other hand out for yours. You climb up onto the table, your friends getting on the chairs. 

Every insecurity dissipates from your body as you sing loudly with your friends, swaying your hips to the music. You surrender yourself to the genius that was Shania Twain and Mutt Lange. As you break into the chorus for a second time, a glint of silver across the club catches your eye. Standing on the other side of the dancefloor, leaning against the bar top, is Joel Miller. 

His eyes are locked on yours; he’s wearing brown dress pants and a white short sleeved button up shirt, the top few buttons are left undone and it pulls at his biceps perfectly. He looks so sexy and casual, hair pushed back as he swirls the amber coloured whiskey around in its glass. He smiles devilishly, shaking his head jovially at you as you put on a show for him. As the song ends he crooks his pointer and middle fingers at you, silently calling you over. The simple motion of his fingers makes your pussy flutter, wetness slicking your thighs since you decided to forgo underwear tonight. Risky choice with the high slit of the skirt but suddenly it’s feeling like it’s the best decision you’ve ever made.

“I’ll be right back,” you whisper to your girlfriends as they help you off the table. They call for more shots and you refrain from all out sprinting to Joel. 

“Quite the show you put on up there,” he says, grabbing your bicep like he did at the poker game and pulling you gently along with him.

“You didn’t seem to mind.” You twist your arm out of his grasp and stumble. You’re definitely well on your way to being drunk, but you don’t want him to know that.

He grabs for your waist to steady you. “Careful, you’re drunk.”

“I’m not. And even if I was, I’m celebrating, so I’m allowed to be drunk. Not allowed to be your sub, but allowed to be drunk.” His eyes darken and you know you’ve crossed some sort of undrawn line, but you’re at that reckless sass point in your tipsiness and you really don’t care. A saccharine sweet smile crosses your face as you plant your hands on your hips.

“You sure you wanna play this game, sweetheart?” He practically growls.

“I’m not your sweetheart, I’m Tommy’s,” it comes out poutier than you expect. You spin on the balls of your feet and head back to the dance floor. As always, you can feel his eyes on you as you walk away. When you approach the dance floor you see a handsome man about your age looking at you. A quick glance over your shoulder confirms Joel is watching, you grab the hand of the stranger and say, “Let’s dance.”

As all young, drunk boys do, he obliges. You spin and press your back in this body, grinding your ass into him and keeping your eyes locked on Joel. How did he find you here? Why would he be out at this particular club, unless of course he’s keeping an eye on the icy blonde woman. She confirmed they only see each other once a month though, so why? Is he following you somehow?

The boy's hands move to your hips, traveling up your abdomen. You wink at Joel, pulling your hair to the side and tilting your head so the boy behind you has access to the same spot on your neck that he had in his office. Just as his lips start to lower Joel snaps. Got him, you think. He takes a few long strides onto the dance floor, pulling you away like you’re some sort of toy, like he’s a caveman coming to take what’s his. You let him pull you, yelling an apology to the boy on the dance floor.

Even though you’re happy to go with him, you can’t let him know that. “Joel, stop it. You can’t kick me out of here too.”

He takes you down a quiet, dark hallway, barely illuminated by the red glow of the EXIT sign. “I own half this place, baby. So I can.”

You twist your arm free from his grip, “You’re the bane of my existence, Joel Miller.”

“Why haven’t you filled out your app yet?”

You scoff, anger and annoyance starting to replace the happy feeling you had when he pulled you from the dance floor. “Are you stalking me?”

“Don’t flatter yourself. Doms can see where their subs are at all times if they accept the location tracker on the app.”

Shit, all those menus that you just clicked ‘Accept All’ to at the beginning. Of course your dom would be able to find you, depending on the relationship they can control everything you do. “You’re not my dom!” You state.

Joel rolls his eyes. “I know. Tommy told me you hadn’t filled it all out yet and where you were. So, why haven’t you filled out the app?”

You lean back on the railing along the wall and slide your feet from your heels, placing them on the cool tile of the floor to soothe the ache in your arches. Your hands come back to grip the railing. “It’s none of your business.”

“Sweet girl, in this case it literally is my business. The JM stands for Joel Miller.”

This time you roll your eyes and then mumble, “Because I don’t want Tommy. I don’t think I’m going to fill it out anymore.”

Joel leans back against the railing across the small hall from you, pinching the bridge of his noise in annoyance, “Please. For me, can you just fill it out?”

“For you? You made it clear you don't want me. I’m filling it out for Tommy.”

He crosses his arms, biceps bulging even more against the tight fabric of his short sleeved button up, if he’s not careful he’s going to go full incredible hulk on that shirt. Not that you’d mind.

“That’s not what I’m sayin’ and that’s also where you’re wrong. You’re fillin’ that out for you. If you’re fillin’ it out for anyone else, then you’re doing this for the wrong reasons.”

You let out an unimpressed sounding huff, “I’m not.”

His lips press into a tight line as he considers his words carefully; Joel is old enough to know not to argue with a twenty-one year old who’s had tequila. “Ok, you’re not. So then why do you want to be a sub?”

He watches as your whole body seems to deflate, there’s a shift, almost like desperation in your body. Sadness lines your eyes as they meet his and your voice comes out small and uncertain. “Because I’m exhausted, Joel. I - I spend all day making decisions, and studying, and learning about civil rights law. I’m always having to come up with a plan A, and B, all the way to plan Z sometimes. And then,” your head falls back to the wall as you continue speaking to the ceiling with your eyes closed, “Then I do it all over again the next day. I can’t shut it off, my brain. It just keeps going and going. It's so loud, so constant, so fucking overwhelming and there’s no escape.”

You fall silent and he steps forward, slipping his large hand behind your neck and bringing your gaze to his. You continue, fighting against the boulder that’s forming in your throat, “I don’t think I’m good enough. Or strong enough…Smart enough. I want to see for once that I am, want to see what I can overcome. For once,” you sigh heavily. “For once I just want someone to tell me how well I’m doing.”

Joel’s eyes fall to your lips, his voice a hoarse whisper, “Fill out the app.”

You take a deep breath. You feel lighter after finally getting to confessing all of that to him. That was your plan for his office the other day, but something about him flusters you and you were completely knocked off the rails by that special unknown thing Joel has over you. You whisper, “I don’t want to do this with Tommy. Please, Joel.”

Joel’s forehead comes to rest on yours, you can see the golden flecks in his dark eyes at this proximity. He smells like mint, and that same ash and leather from his office the other day. You should ask him right now why he let you in his basement today, but he speaks before you can. “Can you please, just for once, show me that you can listen?”

“Kiss me,” you hum, trailing your hands up his strong arms.

He stiffens under your touch. “What?” he asks dumbfoundedly.

“Kiss me and I’ll go home right now and fill out the app,” you whisper, inching your lips closer to his. 

“You’ll go home, fill out the app, and you will not touch yourself.” It’s not a question, it’s a deep command.

Now it’s your turn to be confused as you say, “What?”

He crowds his body closer to yours, pulling his face back slightly so he can take you all in. You’ve never seen this expression before, that flash of darkness from the first time you called him Mister Miller in your car has permanently etched itself into your mind, but it’s almost like he’s transitioned into full dominant Mister Miller now. “If you want to convince me to be your dom, it’s not going to be through just a kiss. So prove to me that you can listen, prove to me that you can be a good girl. ”

The wetness between your legs starts to coat your thighs at the sound of him asking you to be a good girl. You clench your thighs together as his forehead meets yours again.

He continues, his voice just as commanding, “If I give you this kiss, you’ll go home alone, you will not touch that dripping little cunt, and you will fill out the app.”

Your pussy is throbbing with need. You should have known better than to sass him so hard tonight. Someone as competent and experienced as Joel would know exactly how to punish his sub when they were acting up. You nod your head and hum in agreement to his demands.

“Ask me nicely.” He murmurs.

“P-please…kiss me, Joel.” Butterflies assault  the inside of your stomach.

You didn’t think it was possible, but he manages to crowd you even more, your entire body pressed firmly against his. Every skin cell is screaming for his attention, every nerve firing off signals making you hyper aware of anywhere he’s touching you.

“Ask me again using that name I told you not to call me,” He knows he’s playing with fire, but at this exact moment he doesn’t care, he fucking loves the way his preferred dom name sounds coming off your lips. 

“Kiss me, Mister Miller. Please?” It’s airy and desperate, your knees feel weak below you and it feels as if you can’t get a full breath in. The anticipation is killing you. 

“Why?” he growls. Growing up you were always afraid of dark spaces, but if there were any monsters in this hallway they’d be running scared at the timbre of his voice right now.

Your back arches instinctively into him. You’re safe here, Joel Miller is your safety. “Because I need you, Mister Miller. Please. Just one kiss…then I’ll do anything. I promise. P-please. I need to feel you on me, Mister Miller.”

Joel bends slightly, his hands come to the back of your thighs and he lifts you, slamming you against the wall. You squeal, arms flinging around his neck as your ankles hook around his waist. He pins you to the wall with his hips and lets go of your thighs. Both of you are practically panting, his cock is hard as steel, pressing against his zipper and your bare pussy. Your skirt is covering you from exposing yourself to him but something about the glint in his eye when your bodies connect makes you think he might know you don’t have any panties on. 

His hands peel your arms from around his neck and he pins them with one hand above your head like he did in his office. You whimper and grind your hips against him. His free hand wraps around your throat, holding it gently. 

“No,” he growls and it takes every ounce of self control you have to stop your hips. “Say it again.”

He watches your mouth hungrily as you lick your lips and you fight back a moan. He can feel your pulse firing rapidly under his calloused fingertips. A needy whisper passes your lips, filling the miniscule space left between your bodies. “I need you, Mister Miller. Please kiss me.”

With that he slams his lips against yours. It’s a desperate and heady mess of tongue and teeth, your moans being swallowed by his greedy mouth. You tilt your head to allow him in more. His tongue devours every inch that it can reach. He nips at your bottom lip before diving back in. He takes whatever he wants from you and you let him. For the first time in years your brain is quiet. No anxiety about the quickly approaching LSAT, no thinking of whatever practice question you’re stuck on. That nagging fear of being rejected from all the law schools you’ve applied to goes silent. The worrying voice that tells you you’re not good enough disappears. Everything you are is replaced by whatever Joel gives. 

You grind down onto him as you flick your tongue against his; he’s so rough yet so very soft. His tongue tastes like mint and whiskey. You can feel your orgasm building, it’s going to happen embarrassingly fast at this rate. You feel light headed from lack of oxygen and the slight push of his fingers into the side of your throat. More, more, more, you yell in your head.

Joel breaks the kiss and puts you down on your feet, holding you steady as you find your legs again. His lips are puffy and even though it’s not the time to be thinking of this, you realize there isn’t a single drop of red lipstick on his face, so it really will last twelve hours without smudging. 

His thumb comes to your face, swiping along your bottom lip gently, “Put your number in my phone, sweet girl.”

He holds his brand new iPhone Max out to you and you tap your number in with shaky fingers. He sends a quick text when you hand his phone back and then he kneels in front of you, helping you back into your heels. As he stands his hand trails from your ankle, all the way up the slit of your skirt to settle on your clothed hip. “Go get your stuff and go home now, baby. There’ll be a car waiting for you out front.”

He pats your bum gently as you walk on shaky legs back to your VIP booth. You feel like a newborn giraffe as you make your way to your table. 

“Where have you been?” Jamie proclaims, holding up a tequila shot for you.

You wave her off, “I think I’ve had too much. I’m gonna go but I want you girls to stay. Enjoy your night for me.”

It takes a few minutes but you convince your friends to stay and that you’ll be fine and already have a ride arranged. As you exit the club there’s a gorgeous blacked out town car parked in front. An older gentleman in a suit looks at you and nods, “Good Evening, Miss. Are you the young lady Joel Miller has asked me to escort home?”

You nod back, trying to act like this is an everyday occurrence and not the most outrageous thing that’s ever happened to you. As soon as you get home you change into your most unflattering set of pajamas, hoping that if you feel unsexy then it’ll stop that insistent throb between your thighs. Joel was so fucking close again, and this time there was no underwear in his way.

You slide open the app, Tommy Miller is still set as your dom, but you go through the preferences carefully and answer as honestly as possible as to what you want. You try to focus on the questions even though you can still feel Joel's throbbing cock pushing against you, and his warm hands around your wrists and throat. You can still taste him on your lips. You shake the ghost of him off of you and remind yourself again what you want from this, aside from mind-blowing orgasms. 

You fill out every section and then hit save. Just as you are about to lock your phone and try to fall asleep your phone vibrates, the JMK app as a notification.

‘Your Assigned Dominant has changed to Joel Miller’

Your heart pounds behind your rib cage as you stare at the notification, your head feels fuzzy, possibly from the booze, or that kiss, but you can’t believe your eyes. You close out of the app and go back in, staring at where Joel’s name has replaced Tommy’s. Just as it all starts to feel real you get a text message from a number you don’t have saved. You click on the message app.

“No coming until I say so, I know you weren’t wearing any panties tonight. Messy little pussy ruined my pants. Go to sleep now, my sweet girl.”

[emmyrosee]

this is an actual thing that happened to me and my poor friend like, an hour ago lmao

——

It’s been raining for three weeks straight.

On the list of things that make Katsuki angry, rain is high, high up on that list, above most people and most things. Rain feels useless to Katsuki, does nothing but make things wet and gross, and he’ll never forgive the rain for drowning his plants as a kid.

Rain makes him a certain degree of agitated.

You, on the other hand?

“Baby, look! It’s raining!” You beam.

You like it. Freak.

The forecast had no called for rain, nor had his phone given any warnings, but as he paid the bill for lunch, seemingly as soon as the waiter took his card, the rain poured to godlike fury.

Phenomenal.

There’s nothing he loves more on his one Saturday off a month than sprinting through monsoon season in worn down sneakers and your feet padding behind him. There’s nothing he finds more euphoria in than opening the passenger side door for you and feeling the squish of a puddle in his shoe.

And he absolutely, completely, totally understands how on the gods’ decaying, rotten earth, why you enjoy this so much.

At this point, all Katsuki wanted to do was go home, curl up in a ball with you close by and nap all the frustration and cold rain away for the next few hours-

“LOOK OUT!” You scream, and instantly, Katsuki slams on his brakes, nearly flinging you both out the window. His face paled in panic before coming back in a complete anger.

“What the fuck was that!”

“Look!” You whimper, pointing out past the windshield with a worried pout. He squints as best as he can past the pouring rain, to no avail. You groan next to him and quickly leap out of the car to chase whatever you seem to see, making him snarl a firm ‘GET BACK HERE,’ through his teeth. You put your hands on your knees as you look down at the pavement, and he looks around for a oncoming car that you seem to ignore remembering that you’re in the middle of the goddamned road.

“Are you fucking insane?!” He snaps, opening his own car door and getting out to chase you. “You’re going to get sick, and I’m not going to take care of you.”

You pout up at him before fixing your gaze back down at the road, “you were gonna hit him.”

“Hit who?”

“The turtle,” you whine, fixing the hood of Katsuki’s sweater on your head to keep the rain off your face. With a furrowed brow, Katsuki does finally look down to see a small turtle settled in the road, blinking its slimy eyes softly as if half exasperated as Katsuki is.

He sighs in exhaustion, “you made me get out of my car, in the pouring rain, bordering fucking hail, to look at a snapping turtle?” His hands smack his face and scrub it in frustration, “this can’t be my life. There no way.”

“Can we save him?” You ask quietly, clearly very upset by the idea of this little creature being squashed.

“How do you- what- NO!” He snaps, mercilessly. You whimper softly before falling to your knees, water squishing under the bones. He’s got to admit, you do look very sad, but it’s 45 degrees outside and holy crap he’s gonna freeze out here and it’s your fault.

He hears you sigh from under his hoodie, and you reach out to touch the small turtle, only retracting your hand when it lurches out to snap at you.

“See? Why do you want to save this little shit?”

You scoff, “he’s just scared, it’s not his fault.”

“Yeah, snap at you again and I’ll give him something to be scared about.”

This, you give him a small laugh at, and he does sobsr up slightly. Your head turns up to look at him, rain hitting your face and lip still in a small pout. “Please, help me save him, Katsuki?”

Fucking god.

He growls softly, “how do you want me to save him? He’s a snapping turtle, can’t just lift his ass up.” You gnaw softly at your lip before looking back at the small turtle now receding into its shell in fright.

Then, you brighten, “just go home and get a shovel!”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“I’m not fucking going home, digging a shovel out of the garage, coming back and moving a turtle six feet to the other side of the road. You’re insane- he’ll be fucking fine, babe, let’s just go home.”

“I don’t want to leave him,” you say softly. “I’ll stay here, and if he moves, I’ll call you and walk home-“

“Are you fucking high? I’m not leaving you here, dumbass.”

Looking back up at him, you give him a cocky shrug, “guess you’re picking up the turtle with your hands.”

He could throttle you. Right here, in the middle of the road, right now.

With his patience running thin, and clothes soaked and heavy, he snarls softly before stomping back to the car, whipping out a small blanket he usually keeps for you when you fall asleep. He wraps it in his hands before stepping back over to you and the turtle, scooping the small reptile in his hands and grumbling as he walks it over to the sidewalk, placing blanket and all on the concrete. The turtle squirms and writhes, but once it’s placed on the sidewalk, it quickly scuttles into the mud and grass and far from the road. In the background, you’re cheering and clapping your wet hands, and he’s choosing to ignore you.

He grits his teeth and turns to you, “car. Now.”

“What about the blanket-“

“Car. Now.”

You’re still smiling as you round back to the passenger side of the car, and he hates knowing that you know he’s not completely mad, more talk than anything else.

Little rat.

He get into the driver side of the car and blasts the heat in a meek attempt to get warm, his temples pounding and heart more than ready to just get the hell home.

But his thoughts come to a halt when your arms toss around his shoulders over the center console and kiss all along his neck and cheek and temple.

“My hero,” you coo, pecking softly. “Saving everyone and everything for me. You’re the best ever. My handsome and brave hero.”

“Sit down,” he grumbles, trying to fight the warmth in his face. You ignore him, continuing to hum out praises and loving words as he drives you both home, knowing full well that you both know he’s weak to your pleas and requests and it’s going to be far from the last time he does something like this for you.

Freak.

[lovexjoe]

Unspoken

Part 1 

Synopsis: Jack and Y/N have been best friend for years. She recently ended her 2 year relationship, due to moving to Atlanta for a better job opportunity. What’s going to happen when she stays with Jack for a week ?

Warning: fluffy, angst?, language and smut🧎🏽‍♀️

Y/N POV 

Great!!! I finally found an apartment for myself, but I have to stay at a hotel for a week due to maintenance. I sighed as I begin to search the internet for a hotel suitable to my needs. Currently I’m at Jack’s house, cause he offered to let me stay the weekend as I sorted myself out. Moving to a new state is draining. I left a lot of my things back home as my mom said it’s good to just start fresh. So I packed what I needed and hopped on the plane. I left so much behind, even my 2 year relationship. Surprisingly, I’m okay and even happier that it ended. There wasn’t a spark between us. He treated me well, but the relationship over all was boring. I guess I kept it going for so long, because it was better than being alone. 

“Alright what’s got you so stress? You been glue to the computer since you woke up” Jack says as he sits down next to me on the couch. 

“The apartment won't be ready for another week and I need to find a hotel beca-” 

“Hell no! Come on, you know you can stay here till it’s ready. I’m not taking no for an answer either. Now can you stop stressing before you explode. That vein on your forehead is serious” He starts his usual teasing. I laughed and playfully shoved him. 

Arguing with him was useless. It was his way or no way. I finally close my laptop and enjoyed whatever tv show he was currently hooked on. He stretched out his left arm and placed it on the back on the couch. I crawl into my usual spot: snuggled up with a blanket. 

“I missed you. I know you’re stressed but I’m happy to finally spend some time with you this week.” Jack says honestly. You were taken aback but also happy as well to be here with him.

“Me too”

Jack’s POV

She takes her usual spot on the opposite end of the couch, I so badly want to pull her close to me. As selfish as it sounds I hope her apartment takes an extra week so she could stay longer. And those god damn PJs she wears is gonna end me. She could wear a turtleneck and I’d probably still have the same reaction. 

I had met her through Druski as she was working with him for a while on video concepts and managing his social media. As soon as they linked up, she got his account to gain a million followers within a month. Thats why Jack put his full trust in her when it came to his social media. He’ll give her a heart attack here or there when he posts some random video of him trying to dance. Keyword is try because he looks like he’s glitching half the time. 

~~~~~

They indulge in a few episodes together before both of their stomachs start grumbling. Jack grabs his phone to open up UberEats. She gives him an insane look. 

“Jack you already ordered UberEats for breakfast, do you ever actually cook?” She arched her brows at him and he just looks at her cause lowkey she ate him up with that one. 

Oh yea forgot to mention, she got attitude that could last a lifetime and he fucking loved it. 

“You know I can’t cook!” He tried to justify but she’s already up and headed to the kitchen scanning the pantry and fridge for a simple meal. 

“Alright since you insist on me staying here for a week, you have to learn how to cook to at least survive.” She points the wooden spoon at him which causes him to laugh and throw his hands up in the air. 

“Goddamn Gordon Ramsey when did you even grab that!?” 

“Mmm don’t worry about that, give me a cutting board and knife stat! We making the world’s simplest meal. Pasta!” 

Pasta? Yeah no, he has spent his entire life over and under cooking pasta noodles. He watches her work the kitchen like a natural, pulling out ingredients he didn’t know what was what but he  tried his hardest to pay attention. She started with washing, then cutting then cooking. When it started to heat up in the kitchen, she tossed her hair up in a messy bun and in that moment Jack swore his heart could burst outta his chest.  He was trying his best not to stare inappropriately, but she was down right beautiful. 

Her ex was an idiot for letting her out of his sight, but he had to thank him because he’s not letting this chance pass up. There’s been multiple times throughout their friendship that her previous relationship and his hookups were not too fond of what they had. Which caused a few months of silence here and there. It use to kill him that he couldn’t reach out to her or hear her voice. She’s the reason why most of his hookups never lasted. Even during sex he wasn’t fully present, always distracted. 

As she finished up the tomato basil pasta, she turns around bumping into Jack not realizing he was so close to her. She felt so small around him, he looks down at her and smiles. 

“Hi” he says as he looks into her green hazel eyes that complimented her tan skin. 

“Hi…” she wish he would just kiss her, but she probably wasn’t what he even wanted. This man has the whole world at his feet. Why would he want her? They both stood there for a few extra seconds, just admiring their favorite features of the other. 

He swore she bite her lip 

She swore he was staring at her lips 

Kiss me already they both thought.

The sizzle of the pot reminded her she needed salt, so she purposely pushes up against him to grab the salt 

“Excuuuuseee me” she says innocently causing him to blush. 

“Smell yummy, thank you seriously” He says as she hands him his plate. As she makes her plate last, but Jack grabs it and heads over to the dinner table. Pulling out her seat for her, she happily sits as he grabs them some wine. 

“Oh my god, this is amazing!” He hums enjoying all the flavors that melt in his mouth. She’s really getting brownie points right now cause once his tummy is full he is a happy camper. 

This could be them, she thought. If only he wanted her. 

This could be them, he thought. If only she wanted him. 

After a few glasses of wine and enjoying the food together. Jack knew she was gonna crave something sweet because anytime he took her out dessert was always a must. He took her plate and nods his head for her to follow him.  

He grabs a bowl, vanilla ice cream, sprinkles, chocolate drizzle and whipped cream. Instantly her smile appears on her face, he still remembers her favorite toppings. How could he not though? He remembers everything about her. They both assisted each other is building the sundae. 

“Time for the finale!! Whipped cream!” She shakes it up and hands it to him to do the honors. Jack holds down the nozzle but it was stuck. He shook it one more time confused cause he literally just bought it when he told Y/N to stay at his crib. Yes he fully stocked the house and made sure it was squeaky clean before she got there. He even went to target and Ulta and stocked up on products she’d like or needed for the guest room. 

“This thing is stupid!” He holds the nozzle facing Y/N and it shoots out straight onto her neck and face. They both looked shock but Jack was trying so hard to hold his laughter in. 

“Oh you little shit!” They both busted into laughter. 

The wine definitely taking effect as laughter filled the air. Their stomach hurting so much from being full and the happiness that overcame them. Grabbing a towel, Jack pulls her close and the two still having the giggles. She wasn’t in control anymore because she couldn’t believe the words that was escaping her mouth. 

“Lick it off of me….” Jack freezes. Is he dreaming? Is she fucking with him? Wouldn’t be a nice joke but the way she was looking at him she’s lucky she doesn’t get bent over this island right now. 

“Are you sure?” He looks into her eyes wanting to confirm because if he starts god only knows if he’ll have the strength to stop. 

“Yea….make me your dessert.” She wipes some whipped cream off her neck slipping her finger in his mouth to suck it off. The need growing between them as she felt his tongue lick her finger dry. His lips meeting her neck, licking up all whipped cream on her as her moans escape her mouth. 

Fuck. He thought this was it, she’s gonna get eaten up tonight, he had to taste her. He was hungry for it. His hands caressing her face, as their lips finally meet. They both dreamt of this moment endless amount of times, but nothing….nothing could compare how this really felt. The little sounds she makes got him bricked up and aching. It’s almost as if she knew what effect she had on him cause her hand begins to palm him through his joggers. He groans into her mouth, causing a certain wetness to form in her panties. She never knew Jack had an aggressive side to him, she always teased him of being vanilla. 

He picks her up and sets her onto the island. Slipping her shorts off and spreading her legs. No panties? Fuck, her pussy glistened from her wetness under the lights. She closed her legs, starting to feel shy. 

“Nuh uh, open those legs for me. Lemme see that pretty pussy.” Oh god she loves this. He gets on his knees, kissing her lips, taking in her scent causing her hips to buck. 

“Jaack please don’t tease,” she feels his breath on her as he laughs, knowing exactly what he was doing. He takes her clit into his mouth, slowly sucking and swirling his tongue. He was so fucking handsome and with your pussy in his mouth made him even hotter. Working his tongue up and down your folds, you lift you hips slightly to ride his face. 

Fuck fuck fuck 

Jack couldn’t believe how fucking beautiful you looked under the island lights. Everything about you just amazed him. He works his movement with yours as he sees your body tensing up. 

“Fuck Jack, I’m- fuck I’m gonna cum!” In that moment he slips two of his fingers in, curving them upwards pumping them in and out. The only thing that could be heard was your cries and the wetness of your pussy. His fingers were big and long you could only imagine what he’ll stretch you out to. He pulls you close to him, placing little kisses along your cheek and neck. He lets you ride out your orgasm from his fingers. He only just begun with you, but he notices the slight sheen of sweat that covered your body. 

“You have no fucking idea how long I’ve wanted you.” He places a soft kiss on her lips. 

“Jack I need you, please.” She reaches into his jogger to pull him out. His tip already leaking with precum. Teasing him, she rubs his length between her wet folds causing him to groan. The lust that filled both of their eyes as they watch his tip play with her clit. Jack slipped in not being able to handle it anymore. 

Y/N lets out a soft cry not realizing how big he really was. Her back was cold against the marbled island, but the way Jack started pounding into her she couldn’t possibly give a fuck about anything 

“Jaackkk” she cries out throwing her head back

“I know it’s big baby, you can take it. Be good for me and take it.” His thumb starts to rub circles on her clit as he continues his ruthless thrusting. She was drunk off of his fucking. Not a single thought was running through her head besides the fact that he felt so fucking good and was deep.

“Look at you. Such a good fucking girl taking me. So beautiful baby.” He whispers his praises into her ear, till he feels her clenching him tightly. His free hand grabs the back of her hair firmly to make sure he was looking at him as she cums. 

“Mmm fuck, where do you want it?” She better answer quick cause those hazel eyes looked fucked out and he could barely hold on. 

“Inside me! P-please please” 

Jesus Christ 

He nods as he increases his speed, hitting a new spot for her causing her to come undone. She couldn’t even stop the babbling. 

“I love you I-I love you Jack.” He kisses her passionately, emptying himself deep inside her. 

“I love you too.” He says out of breath. 

He picks her up carrying them to his bedroom. She was completely out of it, her eyes closed and sleep slowly taking over her. He couldn’t imagine this moment any better. It happened so naturally. He tucks both of them in pulling her closely. She was his. He was hers. Thank god for that fucking apartment delay. 

~~~~~~~~

Y/N woke up feeling satisfied and definitely sore. Some of their friends were suppose to be flying in today to vibe for the next two days. She looks at the sleepy man next to her and smiles. They really had some nasty sex last night when just prior to that they were just best friends. She places a soft kiss on his forehead and decided to make them breakfast. She picked out some boxers and one of his t-shirts and got to work. As she was making them pancakes and eggs, the door bell rang and it was probably Druski since he had the earliest flight. She opens the door to see a girl, who looked like a super model holding a duffel bag. 

“Y/N, right?” 

“Uhh yeah…I’m sorry who are you?”

“I’m Jack’s girlfriend….”

Part 2? 😌

TAGLIST 

@dyttomori @harlowcomehome @itsyagirljaz

[londonfog-chan]

I Will Not Keep My Mouth Shut About this High School Romance Between Eddie Munson x Reader (Headcanons)

Why lord? Why are we not talking about this?

I’ve dated metalhead guys in the past, and believe in me when I say these fuckers move fast.

Eddie is no exception to this rule. He loves hard and quickly, especially if you’re into the same things he’s into as well.

I’m talking balls to the wall insanity like: the day won’t even be over and he’ll have already asked you out, kissed you, offered you weed, and secretly be planning the names of the four kids he wants with you.

Mans is delulu as fuck for you.

As much as he has his passions there’s just something about the fact that you actually gave the town freak unconditional love that makes him desperate. Corroded Coffin, Hellfire Club, he’d pick you over them any day if it meant he got to keep you.

Guarantee, you’ll already have gone all the way before the weekend is up of that first week of the relationship.

Cherry boy cherry boy cherry boy.

But he knows what he’s doing. It will have been awkward but the best part is now “Rainbow in the Dark” makes you feel all hot under the collar and “Shame on the Night” makes you laugh and reminds you of the awkward panic cleaning up after.

The epitome of live fast die young. He will throw his life away if you ask him to, so make sure you use your powers wisely.

At some point Eddie will ask you to run away with him. He doesn’t give a shit where, so long as it’s with you.

Shared interests are probably how the two of you met in the first place, especially if you’re like me and unable to beat the weird kid allegations. You drifted towards his club because you for whatever reason were an outcast too.

Eddie would probably crush on those who are conventionally pretty, popular, the epitome of the 80’s beauty standards. That’s just human nature. But with you… it’s so much more different.

You’re like his nerdy fantasies come to life, like the princesses he writes about in his campaigns that are a mix of dark, dangerous, able to hold their own and fight for him and with him. Think of if you will a sexy bombshell rotoscoped into those old metal music videos. Facing the world wearing only red lipstick and a cocksure expression.

He would get along so well with someone who wasn’t afraid to let their wild side show, or to express it. But at the same time if you’re more shy and reserved, he is determined to help you come out of that shell and be the best possible version of yourself.

It’s impossible not to match his excitable energy, it’s just so goddamn contagious. It might scare you how far you’re willing to go for Eddie and how quickly you might find yourself changing. Because believe me, you will change, and it will be for the better.

Eddie will always be your number one hype man.

He will literally be so excited about everything you do because it’s you! The person he loves more than anyone in this whole entire world.

Eddie will literally put up with so much for you. Even if you guys fight he will struggle to maintain his composure because he does not want to fuck this beautiful thing up.

Drives himself up the wall with anxiety about it too. But that’s the thing about Eddie’s dynamic with you: is that he will do what it takes to keep his fucking cool around you.

Your fights are infrequent but can get explosive if there are unsaid insecurities. So to avoid this: keep honest with him. About everything. Don’t lie to him, because as fast as he fell for you, lying is the quickest way to break his trust and send him packing.

One of his flaws in the relationship is that his insecurity that this will all go away will make him all that more prepared to leave if you have a massive blow up fight.

Like he’s already preplanned his exit strategy and everything.

But the longer you’re together, the more comfortable he gets and eventually he settles down from jumping the gun into taking things one day at a time.

He’s a fucking keeper. And all I’m gonna say is you better start training with swinging a blunt weapon because once you have him, you’re going to be right there in the Upside Down fucking up some monsters keeping them away from your man.

[penguinkyun]

chapter 146 review

i feel a little insane about this chapter. alright not just a bit a lot oh my god we are so back everyone 

before we begin, due to the nature of this chapter including himekawa airi, csa and child abuse along with a murder suicide are going to be mentioned so if you do not feel upto engaging please click off and take care of yourself

lets start with the filming scenes then. so we start with airi trying to reassert control and get into hikaru's head by telling him taiki was his son (horrifying) and how he would return to her because no one would love him (can i strangle her can i please please i really fucking want to this absolute-). this is the lead up to what is essentially the turning point in kamiki's life and hkai relationship: the uehara-himekawa murder suicide.

its so incredibly fucked that right after hikaru asks ai if she'll love him forever (as a direct response to airi manipulating him) she doesnt outright say yes (but she admitted she was trying to be honest and that is such a huge step forward for her) and when he tells uehara, the murder suicide happens. its a string of events very heavily culminating in an absolutely horrible situation for kamiki to find himself in. you can see from that panel of kamiki screaming that he absolutely did not mean for that to happen and it weighs on him. and speaking of weights…the Cut 156: Importance of Life comes right after the scene of the uehara-himekawa murder suicide. doesn't that name sound very Very similar to a certain dialogue? 

honestly its this similarity that has me tentatively putting out an incredibly batshit theory that for some reason, before filming and the final script was produced, aqua and kamiki met and something in that conversation caused a noticeable shift in how kamiki was portrayed in film. because for a film meant to murder someone, its oddly sympathetic isn't it? even to the point ai herself becomes a little less sympathetic. almost like it isn't kamiki's sole responsibility (although he was definitely involved) of the murder of ai and that someone else was pulling the strings as well cough secret villain kaburagi-. 

the shift is obvious in how frill calls it an extremely spiteful script…but once the final script is produced, both mem and kana point out that there is some kindness in the work, and that its difficult to say whether there is hatred or not. very shrimptresting. 

this is also backed up by…how exactly did aqua know all of this? i doubt kamiki would've told anyone else except maybe ai, and the only person who would know all of this down to the exact detail is kamiki himself. 

right this is becoming a full conspiracy theory that deserves its own post so lets move on 

anyway this chapter was so good for hikaru-ruby and ai-aqua parallels because hikaru nearly begging ai to say she loves him and will stay forever is incredibly reminiscent of ruby asking aqua if sensei still likes her and not letting him go out of fear he'd disappear if she did so and how both ai and aqua deflect awkwardly in those conversations out of discomfort with the question being presented to them and out of a desire to not outright lie to kamiki and ruby respectively

sidenote: goddamn the acting in this chapter. frill deserves several many awards for this film

sidenote sidenote: in movie!kamiki flopping onto ai was so adorable askjfsks ruby flopped the same way onto ai (in the bath scene in the volume extra)

and before we get to the next section let me just- 

screams 

kana nation we are so fucking back. 

this really is the start of aqua opening up!!! finally. i wonder what shift caused this given how intent he was on Never Telling Anyone but man am i so happy its happening. aqua being happy for the first time in quite a while like…how many chapters has it been? he's happy for 0.6 seconds!!! he giggled!!! im so happy aqua is actually happy askhfsks

aqua also now has a specific wry smile when talking about his mental health (just like ai has a very specific suffocating smile when shes trying to deflect)

kana’s response to this is honestly incredibly in character in that expression of concern she has seconds before she decides to keep the status quo of bickering esque dialogue that she has with aqua (likely trying not the overwhelm him) but very clearly expressing that she doesn’t want aqua to die and extracting the promise from him that he wouldn’t do so. then proceeding to act extra silly to try and cheer him up. kana i love you

aqua dropping the “i find myself happy when im with you” inhales. please excuse me while i go scream into the void. aquakana lets fucking goooooo. and kana quietly saying it back when aqua leaves? auuuuuughhhh

and finally, the real star of this chapter: KAMIKI’S BACK WITH THE MILK THIS IS NOT A DRILL HES BACK

so many things are interesting about these last few panels because at first i thought ruby was at ai’s grave but on a closer look she’s actually at a shrine? hm. for whom i wonder. did crow girl finally get fed up and tell her to give reverence akfsjsks. 

thing is, i don't think ruby’s in danger. because back in the chapter where kamiki debuted (c.72) he…never actually expresses any hatred or dislike towards her? honestly its rather reads like he’s proud of her and also nino apparently confirmed to kamiki that she wasn’t like ai so if that is his actual motive she’s not in danger of being killed for that. akamengo are the real antagonists of this series for the break next week fr. don’t you love oshi no ko our favourite biweekly manga

so this is an interesting ground for a father-daughter conversation isn’t it? 

[bengiyo]

Knock Knock Boys Ep 8 Stray Thoughts

Last time, Latte took Almond to the beach so he could relax and unwind. While there, he tried to teach Almond how to pick up strangers, but got concerned when Almond intentionally got drunk too fast. He pulled Almond out of that situation and took him back to their room where they kissed for the first time in a scene full of complex emotional layers. Latte stopped them before it went too far, and later shared his own family beach trip trauma. Meanwhile, Thanwa is back with Max and has decided to move back in with him. Peak waited too long, and so Thanwa is choosing to make pragmatic choices in his life to accept a job he doesn’t like and be with a man who isn’t great to him because he’s wealthy.

Trigger warning for 35:00 to 35:30 for attempted sexual assault.

Ew, is MAX the one who is uploading the clips??

I do love the commitment to using Almond waking up Latte as a framing device for the state of the house.

Oh, Peak, you tried.

What in the Princess Leia is this towel arrangement on his head?

These boys are crumbling so fast without Thanwa feeding them.

Okay, I feel better. Thanwa only intends to stay with Max briefly and is not giving him any suckface.

I’m really glad they got Pak for this role. He put a lot of power into that reconciliation scene with Almond and Latte. I like that they’re letting Almond have both desires: Yes he wants to prove his innocence, and yes he wants to help his friend. These are not at cross purposes.

Thank you, Lukpeach. We gotta actually solve the problem.

Gays, let’s please get it together. Y’all are making me feel awkward and I’m not even at this restaurant.

Peak, I understand you, and I am also so frustrated with you.

There’s something so perfect from the costuming of Thanwa in these clothes. They aren’t sitting correctly on him. He looks uncomfortable.

THIS LOOKING BACK AND MISSING EACH OTHER IS DRIVING ME INSANE.

I am in my 30s and spent my 20s either hustling or working in small businesses. There’s way too much chatter in the discourse about red and green flag human beings that strips them of nuance and personality. Let’s talk about a real red flag from a fucking job: Thanwa has told these food reviewer people that he can’t afford to do this little side gig for them, and then they call him out of the blue trying to pressure him into a 3 month probation for a 6 month job, and he must accept today because they’re the ones in a bind? HELL THE FUCK NO. DO NOT WORK FOR THOSE PEOPLE.

I’m glad Peak called Sean. He’s knows he’s the reliable one in this group.

I see you, Lukpeach. She is reaping! She invested early and it is paying off!

Thanwa is in his 20s. Now is the time for him to take these kinds of risks. I hope this works out for him, but keep your eyes open,

Latte has excellent taste in men. I love how every person we’ve seen Latte reconnect with, they all seem to have enjoyed their time with him and are happy to see him again.

Max, if I see you on the streets it’s on sight.

Goddamn, he’s trying to film Thanwa, too. I’m sick of this man.

Kick his ass, Jumper!!

That’s right, Sean, make sure you get your licks in, too!

Oh, what a messy final scene! Thanwa is totally fine to feel hurt about being accused here, but I also don’t think that Peak is off-base to think that Thanwa is trying to protect Max. He doesn’t know what has happened between them because neither of them has shared the important things.

This show continues to hold together! I’m so relieved. Curious where they go next, and if Max just disappears or manages to use his wealth to circumvent trouble. Also worried about potential video of Thanwa also becoming public and causing problems for him in this new role he just took.

[bloodycyrano]

So.. In most videogames, you have the "journal" where you keep codices, quests, character details.. Etc. So here are some of my personal journal-keeping troupes for various videogame MCs!

Dark urge, BG3-

Memory issues. They want to keep a record of everything while it's still fresh in their head.. As someone who struggles with a lot of short term memory loss, and has blocked out a lot of my childhood due to various traumas, I understand a lot of the fear and panic that comes with not remembering things. Not to mention the severe head trauma Orin caused to Durge, they'd probably continue to have memory problems throughout the rest of their life, even after the whole ordeal with the netherbrain.

The Warden, Dragon age: Origins-

I feel like someone gave the Warden an empty journal before they left with Duncan.. For my personal playthrough, I believe it was Hahren Paivel, elder of clan Sabrae. He was far from a mentor, but he was there when my Warden was born. He watched her learn and grow among her cousins, Merrill and Tamlen. He watched them play, and fight. He watched her rival with her best friend, and he watched her get hurt, and leave. Judged her actions no more than he praised her victories.. She had always been so invested in their stories, and learning about their culture. And while Paivel had never had such a respectful child, willing to listen and learn.. He also had never seen one so stuck in a past that they had barely lived themselves. I feel like Paivel wanted her to focus on making new stories of the dalish, and record her own adventures, rather than simply mourning being away from home.

Rhen, Aveyond 1-

I feel like she always kept a journal, but wanted to record everything even more after she was kidnapped. After all, it all started with her trying to find a way home, rather than anything else. I feel like she wanted to record a diary, in case she died, so that her parents would know what happened. Or perhaps, as an optimist, she wanted to keep it so she could show everyone back at Clearwater when she finally returned home. To tell stories of her adventures.

Hawke, da2-

Firm belief that Hawke didn't keep a journal. Ever. Their bestie Varric wrote his book about the hero of kirkwall, and Hawke wrote sassy commentary in the margins.

The inquisitor, DAI-

I feel like the inquisitor is just a massive fucking nerd at heart, and would definitely go on a lecture style rant every half hour if they weren't so goddamn stressed and tired all the time. I headcannon that my personal inquisitor used to work at the Black emporium, acquiring various old relics and shit for the job because they genuinely just loved learning about things, so they record and catalog everything.

Darc and Kharg, Arc the lad: twilight of the spirits-

Darc doesn't keep a journal, he's too much for that. Always in a rush for the next step, hot blooded and ambitious. Plus, he's traumatized and doesn't want to remember shit.- I feel like if anyone in his group kept a journal, it would probably be Volk- But not just any journal. He would probably use one that his wife or children kept before they had died. One that smells like his family. Maybe he feels like he's carrying on a pass time they enjoyed, and puts aside his desire for revenge for the night just to feel close to his family again before bed.

Kharg on the other hand is such a flamboyant little princess who thinks everything he does is important that I wholeheartedly believe he would keep a journal just because he thinks people are going to care enough to read it in a library one day. Bro is so full of himself that it's actually insane. Fuck you, Kharg.

[blingblong55]

Vienna -141

Part 1 is here

This is based on a request

Angst, death of a character, (spoiler its you, lol), suicide, MDNI, GN!Reader

It's been exactly 3 years since you passed away. Three goddamned years where no warm coffee or a warm office was at reach. The men told Laswell they wanted no new members, that for the moment they couldn't take someone in. That a week after your death, and for the past three years, Laswell has given Price the files of amazing candidates however, Price always makes sure to shred those files. Not ever does he look at who is in the file.

Your death was definitely the biggest lost the task force has ever been through.

With that said, now Laswell has been more stricter with Price. He has been ordered to finally and forcefully pick a new team member. Rookie has been the new member of the team. He/she is so alike to you. They even listen to the same music you would, and as Ghost would put it back then before your death, Rookie is a pain in the ass.

He/She, are so talkative, they always have new facts to give the men. And unlike last time with you, they actually stop and listen. Want to know what the creepy part of all of this is?

Rookie is also from Vienna.

Price didn't like the fact that in a way you were still haunting them, that your memory still follows him even with the new recruit. But this time around, he listens, and he makes sure to always stay in check with the new recruit.

Like last time, soap was sick, he had gotten the flu and has been in bed for a while. He heard a knock on his door, and Rookie was there, with a warm soup at hand and some pills for Soap's everlasting headache. Rookie stayed up all night attending Soap's needs. But unlike with you, soap never complained, he in fact never, not once took for granted who Morgan was.

At lunch, unlike last time, Gaz sat with them. He ate breakfast, lunch and dinner with him/her. Weird enough, Rookie never knew about the last member who he/she occupied the place of. But the reason behind this is because Price and Laswell made an agreement to never talk about you, or ever mention you.

A scary morning the men lived through was just last week when Rookie woke up early, as you used to do, he/she made sure the room was warm for when they would wake up. They even made everyone lunch for the day, made sure the news was on, and ran to Price's office to leave the new reports and a fresh cigar on his desk.

Rookie would be at range practice by the time the men woke up, so when they all walked into the common room after their slumber, they were for sure frightened and surprised.

It didn't take long for Rookie to meet some new soldiers around base, who unfortunately told him/her about you. And who you had become to the men of the task force. It was hard for Rookie to even accept the fact you were an actual person and it was harder to grasp that he/she reminded the team of you. It was unfortunate he/she never got to meet you. Maybe you would've finally had a friend amongst base.

It was Wednesday when the team was in the field and fighting the enemy when Rookie was ready to sacrifice it all for them men. To prove that he/she was more than just an insane, in a way, replica of you. Gaz tried to hold them down, but Rookie fought and was nearing the enemy when Price pulled them back. "I am doing this for the team! Go back and take cover, sir!" Rookie yelled as yet another explosion occurred somewhere near them.

Price shook his head, he shall not let you die again. Not this time. You were supposed to retire from this shit job and move away, finally going home. Meet a man/woman and settle down. You had so much ahead of you, a whole life of possibilities and yet, because of his and the others shit job of being your friends and overall good people, you were three years into a sleep that you shall never return from. You had reached Vienna, and Vienna welcomed you, but not in the way Price had planned.

"Sir I have to do this!"

"No, no you fucking can't Rookie!" Ghost was also protecting you and himself, he couldn't loose you once more. It was a reoccurring nightmare he had, loosing his family, you and now Morgan, yeah not happening under his watch.

"But I can help!" they shout once more.

"Why won't you let us help you this time Grim?!” Price had a strong hold on their wrist. It was sealed, you and Morgan had to live.

"what?'Rookie's voice was now more quiet hinting at their hurt. It was at the moment, they realized you were still in a way alive. You lived through the rookie, your life would probably be safe with them. They of course were upset, confused and angered by not just you but by the men that now stand in front of him/her.

Soap noticed how Rookie was more quiet now, how their whole demeanour had changed. Rookie sat down, their whole sense had changed. The team didn't see rookie for who they were, but why who they were shadowed by.

All the times Soap was around rookie, the nights they'd had a cigarette together and talk about nonsense or the times he'd ask for a list of the music rookie listened to, unlike with you. When Gaz would sit with you and make jokes about the other soldiers, and how he would always make sure you were physically and mentally in check. When Ghost would let Rookie sit by his desk and talk his ears off, how at night, he'd made sure rookie was well and asleep. And Price, how he shared a cigar or two with rookie, and he'd share stories and anecdotes with rookie, and the nights Price spent talking about Vienna with them.

It was Rookie who they talked to, no, it was you. Their Grim.

But before this, they only talked to you in their sleep or when they'd all behind each others back would go to Austria, specifically Vienna and visit your grave. They would each adorn your grave with small figures of your favourite movies and shows. It was their only was to amend the damage they had done. One day, behind every one's back, Ghost was home, he had set up an appointment, wanted to tattoo the name Grim with a small 'x' by it, to have you around, just a little longer, like he told himself.

The day after your suicide, Price was in your room, sat at the foot of your bed, when he noticed a small box. It was filled with new cigars, the same brand he smoked every day when you'd place them on his desk. So, just to have some of you with him, he framed one of the cigars.

Gaz and Soap fought over your dog tags for months. Laswell made sure to gift each of the men your older dog tags, but the ones you had at your chest when you died, were carried by Price. It was her gift to him on father's day.

Ghost also had those dog tags tatted into his arm. It was an homage, as he tried to tell himself. Now the men had some of you, Soap and Gaz wouldn't fight over dog tags, and Price would slowly find peace within himself.

What was surprising is that one day, Ghost went to church, he was never a man of God, stopped believing in it when his family died. But one night, when he felt like you were further from him, he went to church and asked the priest to help him believe that maybe, you'd be out there, walking the streets of Vienna and whistling the tune he and the others made fun of you for.

And now, when they all miss you, just a little more, they hum or whistle the tune. They all finally understood why it brought so much comfort to you, as it now bring a sense of peace to them.

A/n: as very much requested, I hope you all enjoy this part. Also, thank you guys for liking the first part...take care<3

REQUESTS ARE OPEN

[joe-spookyy]

hi today i’m ranking werewolf designs based on how much i judged the vfx team for creating them. full post under cut sorry it’s so insanely long but trust me on this one it’s fun i’m discussing an american werewolf in london harry potter twilight the wolf man buffy the vampire slayer etc and so on (except not etc that’s it.) my credentials are i’m insane about werewolf narratives and i’m the boss of the applesauce.

first up is an american werewolf in london. now THAT is a good beast. he’s spooky. he’s scary. he’s wolf-like but not Just a wolf. and they get some mega extra points for that transformation sequence. rick baker the man that you are. however as much as i love it there’s a few critiques i have to bring up. first. it’s kinda odd that so much of the color palette for the transformation scene was browns and blacks when the actual werewolf was mostly grey. the final product was a little off from the transformation. i did like both of them quite a lot though so i’m not that mad. see. look. kind of off. but it’s definitely not bad i can mostly see how one came from the other even though the colors might be a little different. it also sort of lacks in facial movement in its final form as it’s kind of stuck in that permanent snarl, but they did a good job softening its eyes in the final scene where alex is trying to get through to david. 9/10.

mid-transformation fully transformed

next up yeah i have stuff to say about the harry potter prisoner of azkaban remus lupin design. is it fuck ugly. yes. is it cgi. yes. is jk rowling responsible for it. yeah. however. is it kind of a creative take on the typical werewolf idea. i hate to say it. yes it is. it goes against the typical sorta big strong hunky beast werewolf, and i cant lie, i appreciate it. it’s unique and kinda haunting in its own way. i don’t like that it’s bald. but i like the boldness and well. they got creative. 6/10.

ugly fucking freak ⬆️

next i’m going back. way back. yes sir we’re looking at werewolf of london. from 1935. and the wolf man. from 1941. cause they look pretty similar and they’re both jack pierce so yeah i’m lumping them together. if you ask me these ones lean more to the side of wolfman than werewolf - they’re kind of just hairy guys. which is like fine i guess i just think they should put more emphasis on the wolf. i like the wolfman better than the werewolf of london, which makes sense, cause i know the guy playing the london one didn’t feel like sitting for makeup and so jack pierce got to do more on the second round i guess. however WHY was bela lugosi’s werewolf form a straight up wolf and not lon chaney’s? they don’t explain it. rude. they’re iconic of course but they are honestly not showstopping. 5/10.

werewolf of london the wolf man

alright we’re flashing back to the present with twilight!! yeah. ok so last time i was complaining about there being too much man and not enough wolf. or like. too much were? i don’t know. whatever. anyways. this time i’m complaining because it’s too wolf. that’s just. it’s just a big cgi wolf. i don’t like this. it’s boring. i don’t even have that much to say it’s just like. whatever. 2/10.

lame as hell ⬆️

now. i’m gonna get irritating here. next up is buffy the vampire slayer. now i love oz. i wanted to like the design i really did. and they started out off strong. well. strongER. it’s like. kinda bad. but it definitely looks like a wolf? and it’s. kind of person ish? i don’t know. they tried. the bodysuit is loose but it’s better than what’s to come so i have to give it like a tiny bit of respect. 4/10.

see? not great but could be significantly worse.

and it does get worse. so. let me speak. this is the worst thing i have ever seen in my entire goddamn life. that looks like a gorilla. there’s like barely any semblance of wolf on this other than that it has fur. i don’t understand why they decided to go in this direction it looks terrible. and the body suit part always looks loose as hell. it comes across as like an ugly gorilla mascot suit, and they make no effort to have it move in a remotely wolf-ish way. they usually just have it scuttling around like some sort of little freak. oz does not deserve this ugly shit. i love buffy and wanted to enjoy the werewolf episodes but lord have mercy. this sucks. whoever did this i’m gonna find you. 0/10.

oz (bad) evil bitch veruca (worse)

that’s all the werewolves i can think of right now actually. and it won’t let me add more pictures cause i’m on mobile. in conclusion an american werewolf in london did it best and every other depiction of a werewolf should be looking to that for inspiration. but fight me on these by all means i may have objectively correct werewolf opinions but that doesn’t mean i’m not open to discussion. thanks for watching #sparkleon

[osarina]

OMG I LOVE THE EMOJI!!! THANK YOU!!!

Vampire!Dazai 🧛 anon here because it’s time to talk about somno with Dazai again, methinks

When he was the one asleep, you partially considered yourself lucky. He was not used to sleeping without you nearby, but he did work almost four goddamn straight days in choppy territory and stressful conditions.

If it had been any other night, you would have woken him up — not even on purpose, he was just a light sleeper. But he was down for the count.

Which was great for his health, but dreadful for your — not to be crass, but you found no other way of putting it — horny self.

He was lying on your bed in a manner that made your heartbeat go erratic for a moment. He was on his back with one arm reaching towards the other side of the bed — your side of the bed. His head was tilted to face in the same direction.

You traced his jaw with a featherlight touch, enjoying the soft sigh that exited him when your skin met his for the first time that night.

(It would not be the last.)

You approached him by putting one knee on the bed, right beside his waist. You remained standing as your hand moved from his jaw to his cheek. He leaned into your touch.

Your pupils went wide. Oh, you wanted to eat him alive. To consume all he could give.

You swung your other leg over him and sat back, sitting on his pelvis with your hands on your mid-thigh. You slid your hands down towards your knees before leaning forward and placing them on either side of his head. You looked down at the person who caused so much pain and grief in the lives of others while erasing life’s inevitable dullness and loneliness from yours.

You were going to be selfish. You wanted to be selfish and indulge yourself in something you had both agreed upon a while ago.

You shifted yourself so you were straddling one of his thighs instead, since his noises were part of what got you going.

“If you were awake…” You didn’t kiss his lips, you kissed the corners of and around them.

“I wonder what you’d say.” You whispered against his jaw, grinding down against his thigh. Your breath caught at the first electric sensation; oh, you hadn’t anticipated that.

The idea that this was actually happening started to sink in.

Yeah, you could get behind this.

-sorry I got carried away because I have more but this was getting so long lmaoooo not to be tmi but can you tell I’m ovulating-

OH MY GODDDDDD DON'T APOLOGIZE U HAVE ME INSANE ACTUALLY IM SO OBSESSED WITH SOMNO IT'S MY FUCKING FAVORITE THING EVER I'M GOING TO COMBUST

... kissing down his neck and listening to all the soft noises he lets out, watching how responsive his body is to your touch even while he's fast asleep... and you feel bad because you can't imagine how exhausted he must be for him to not wake up for this. he's usually a light sleeper which is part of the reason why he has so much trouble sleeping. he lets out a shaky breath, shifting around when you free his cock from his sweats and you leave soft kisses on his lips to try to soothe him, waiting for him to settle back down before sinking down on his cock and as soon as he's buried to the hilt inside of you, his lashes are fluttering, brown eyes all hazy with sleep and confused as he tries to figure out what's going on, a moan already falling from his lips .... somno ....

[the-iceni-bitch]

You’ll Never Go Down to the Gods Again

Part X/X

Pairing: soft!stepbrother Alpha Ransom Drysdale x stepsister!fem Omega reader

Words: ~2.7k

Summary: You and Ransom navigate the aftermath of everything that’s happened, and finally start your new life together.

Chapter Warnings: explicit language, A/B/O, explicit sexual content (unprotected vaginal sex, knotting), pregnancy symptoms, mentions of violence (nothing in detail just referenced), minor manipulations, hints at other series in the AU, SMUT!! 18+ ONLY!!

A/N: It’s finished!!!! They’ve got their semi-happy ending and they made it all the way through. Our soft babies deserve all the happiness and safety and for nothing bad to happen to them ever again.

I am no longer doing taglists so if you want to stay up to date on all the latest filth, follow my sideblog @the-iceni-library and turn on notifications!

“Are you goddamn insane?” Ransom put his hands on his hips and drew in a deep breath as he stared at Harlan incredulously, tapping his foot and scoffing when the older man just shrugged and nodded. “I’m not a fucking politician.”

“Neither is he.” Harlan took a slow sip from his mug of coffee as he watched Ransom closely. “But as you’ve found out, the interests he’s controlled by are especially unsavory, whereas the only interest you’d be beholden to is mine.”

Ransom groaned as he sank into the chair on the other side of the desk, leaning his head back and letting his eyes fall closed as he tried to get a grip on himself.

He knew that asking for Harlan’s help would have strings attached, but this was something else. The two of you couldn’t be in the city anymore, though, not after idiots from your father’s church had started waiting outside the apartment to harass you and call you a filthy Omega slut every chance they got. Ransom was getting sick of calling the cops every fucking day, and he hated how absolutely terrified you had become. You’d practically refused to leave for your OB/GYN appointment yesterday, and it was making Ransom worried about your pup.

But Harlan could help you. He had the extra property outside of the city, access to medical personnel that would come directly to you, and private security, god the private security alone should make whatever he wanted from Ransom worth it. You were giving him his first great grandchild, he should have been willing to give you everything. And he was, but with his own price.

“She’s not coming on the campaign trail if I do this.” Ransom hated the thought of actually having to be a fucking dancing monkey for his grandfather, but then he remembered how panicked and distressed you had been when the brick had been thrown through your window three days ago, and how long it had taken him to settle you down and get you to sleep. “I’m not going to exploit her for political points.”

“Maybe you should have thought about that before you let the press run that story about her. Yes I know, you didn’t ‘let’ them, but they ran it, and now the Omega rights activists want a piece of her.” Harlan shook his head when Ransom buried his head in his hands and groaned again. “I agree with you, though, I don’t want her traveling right now. I will happily keep her and my great grandchild safe and happy no matter what, but that man is dangerous, and besmirching our family’s reputation, and you’ve afforded me a very unique opportunity to get rid of him.”

“By pimping me out?” Ransom snorted at the no nonsense look on Harlan’s face. “What about Linda?”

“Your mother took a calculated risk by marrying him, it’s not my fault it’s blowing up in her face.” Harlan sighed when Ransom still looked wary, tapping his fingertips on his desk and leaning forward with a small frown on his face. “He’s running unopposed, but the research shows that someone young and sympathetic could run away with the election easily. You won’t have to worry about her at all, I even have a new house just a little less than an hour away that I can set you both up in, and a secure estate in Washington for when you win the election.”

“If I win.” Ransom hadn’t worked a day in his life, he didn’t know why his grandfather was taking for granted that he could win a damn senate race.

“When, I’m backing you, and I only back winners.” The pleased smile teasing Harlan’s lips did not escape Ransom, the younger man blowing out a deep breath and giving him a resigned nod. “Excellent, I will set up a meeting for you with the speech writer and campaign manager later in the week. I want you both here at the manor until after the pregnancy, I have medical staff on site and I’d feel better knowing she has everything she needs without having to travel. Oh, hello dear!”

Ransom started when you shuffled into the room with Harlan’s nurse, he thought her name was Marla. You actually looked somewhat relaxed, and it made his heart melt, the small smile on your face getting wider when he rose to his feet and cradled your jaw in his hands as you chirped softly.

“How was your walk, bunny?” Ransom kissed the tip of your nose and chuckled at how chilly it was. “Is it cold outside?”

“Just a little, it’s nice though.” You purred when he slid a hand down to rest against your growing bump, placing your hand over his and scenting his cheek when you felt a small kick. “Pup seemed to like it, she’s been so active. And it’s beautiful and quiet, and the dogs are so sweet.”

“I’m so glad, bunny.” Ransom took a deep breath and gave Harlan a sideways look before leaning down to rub your noses together. “Would you like to stay here for a bit, bunny? Harlan has agreed to let us stay here until she comes while he helps me find a new place outside of the city.”

“Really?” You looked so happy, beaming with watery eyes when Ransom nodded and turning to Harlan. “Oh, thank you so much, Mr. Thrombey, the city is so terrifying and there’s too many people, I just…”

“Oh, my dear girl, it’s alright.” Harlan stood up and took your hands in his when you started crying happy tears, smiling warmly at you while Ransom rested his chin on the top of your head. “And you need to start calling me Harlan, you're carrying my great granddaughter. You are always welcome here.”

“Thank you, Harlan.” You drew in a shuddering breath and chirped again when Ransom slid his arms around you and kissed your temple. “I promise we’ll treat your house like our own, we can’t thank you enough.”

“Al-alpha…” you whined when Ransom grunted against your neck as he drove his cock into you again, your cunt spasming around him when you came without warning as his balls smacked against your clit. “More, don’t stop.”

“Greedy little bunny.” Ransom cooed and grinned into your shoulder when you just shoved your hips back and bit your pillow as you made desperate noises for him. “You’ve already had three, how many more do you want?”

“All of them, please…” you didn’t even care when you felt warmth starting to stream down your chest while he squeezed your breasts, your arms giving out and your toes curling when he brought you to the edge again right away. “It’s so good.”

“It is so good, Omegamine.” Ransom chuffed and sucked on your mark when he felt you gushing all over his thighs. “This poor pussy is so needy, so hungry all the time.”

“Mmhm.” You gasped and your back arched violently when you came again, your swollen belly brushing against the bed while your pussy squirted for him. “Need my Alpha, don’t want you to go.”

“Oh, bunny, shit.” Ransom slowed down when he heard the emotion in your voice, cradling your chin gently and turning your head so he could press his lips to yours. “I hate it too, sweet girl, but I have to do these town halls.”

“I know, oh!” Your eyes fluttered closed when his knot swelled and locked you together, sighing when you were flooded with warmth and he rolled the both of you onto your sides. “I understand, but she’s going to be here so soon, I worry about you missing it.”

“I won’t miss our girl finally getting here, I promise.” Ransom stroked your hair as your breathing started to slow down, kissing your cheek and rumbling for you when you started fussing with the blankets and your milk soaked nightie. “Harlan said he’d send a helicopter if I need it, he would kill me if I wasn’t here for you.”

“He would, wouldn’t he?” You giggled a little when Ransom nibbled on your ear, winding your fingers through his when he rested them on your stomach.

“Yes, he would.” Feeling you relax made Ransom smile against your cheek. “I’m pretty sure he likes you more than me.”

“Mmhm.” You peeked at him over your shoulder and sank your body into his when he trailed soft kisses along your jaw. “Just promise me you’ll be home tonight?”

“I promise.” He kissed your mark almost reverently as his hand rubbed your belly gently and crooned against your skin. “I’ll always come home to you.”

“No.” Ransom frowned when he looked over the agreement Andy had placed in front of him, tossing it on the desk and leaning back in his chair while the bearded man let out a deep sigh. “I told you, she’s not testifying. Tell the DA she can have a written statement or come up with a better plea agreement so she doesn’t have to go to trial. She’s not setting foot in a courtroom with that bastard.”

“DA isn’t gonna like that.” Andy shrugged and grabbed the takeout container he had set aside. “She’ll get over it though, she likes me. Hates that fucker, she wants to nail him to the damn wall.”

“Good.” Ransom snarled when his thoughts dwelled on Lance for just a few seconds, wishing like he did every time that he had killed the asshole when he had the chance. “Hope she cuts his fucking knot off.”

“She would if she could.” Andy snorted before shoving some noodles into his mouth. “Can you get her statement to me by next month?”

“I think so.” Ransom cocked his brow at Andy when the man practically growled when his paralegal came into the room to hand him some paperwork, not missing how his eyes raked over her possessively when she walked away before he turned his attention back to his friend. “Pup is due any day and that could put a dent in it, but I’ll get it as soon as I can.”

“Alright, that’s fine.” Andy tossed his empty container and followed Ransom when he stood up to leave. “I think there’s press outside, man. You wanna head out the back?”

“No, I’m used to them.” Ransom sighed as he steeled himself. “They’ve been up my ass ever since the election. I’m hoping they’ll calm down by the time we’re in Washington.”

Andy just nodded as he held the door open for Ransom, squinting against the sudden flashing of camera bulbs and snorting before turning to head back to his office. Ransom just clenched his jaw when they started shouting questions at him, shaking his head at being bombarded with inquiries about where you were, were you going to testify, was the baby here yet, were you going to go with him to Washington…

“My wife was the victim of an extremely heinous crime, and is still the target of multiple threats from her father’s congregation. I will not entertain any questions that invade her privacy.” Ransom frowned when one of them asked what names you had picked out. “Nor will I be discussing our child. The election was tumultuous enough, all you need to know is that she will not be testifying, she will not be taking part in any of the numerous activist campaigns that have been harassing her, and that we appreciate you respecting our requests for privacy and discretion while our family does its best to recover from an incredibly difficult year, good night.”

He ignored their continued questions and climbed into the beemer, slamming the door behind him and drawing in a deep breath as he started the engine. Ransom pulled out his phone when he felt it vibrating, almost dropping it when he saw the message and peeling out as he dialed frantically.

“Harlan!” Ransom winced when he ran right through a red light, taking a turn a bit faster than advisable and slamming into the door since he forgot to buckle up. “Please tell me she just started.”

“She did, contractions are about five minutes apart, so you have time.” Harlan trailed off when you called out for Ransom, the need in your voice making your mate press the gas pedal all the way down to the floor and pray that no cops would be between the city and Harlan’s manor. “The doctor is monitoring her very closely and pleased with how she’s doing so far, but she wants you.”

“Twenty minutes.” Ransom finally hit the open road and breathed a sigh of relief, watching the speedometer creep up while he tried to remain calm. “I’ll be there soon.”

He made it in fifteen, slamming the front door open without a second thought and sprinting up the stairs when he heard you moan. You looked so beautiful when he finally saw you, already slick with sweat and doing your breathing exercises while Marta held your hand and told you how good you were doing.

“Alpha…” you tried to smile at him but could only groan when another contraction wracked your body, your grip on Marta’s hand tightening until Ransom replaced it with his own and sitting behind you on the bed so you could lean against him for support. “She’s coming fast, my water already broke.”

“It’s alright, it’s common with first births.” The doctor gave you and Ransom a reassuring smile when he frowned at her, checking your blood pressure again and nodding when Ransom started scenting you and rumbling to help soothe you. “You are doing so well, honey, very brave.”

“Yes, so brave, bunny.” Ransom kissed your hair when you let out a shuddering breath, letting you hold his hands tightly and matching his breathing to yours while he felt you tensing up again. “Just keep breathing, Omega, you’re so good.”

You felt infinitely better with Ransom there, able to relax even through the pain and smiling each time he kissed your cheek or your temple and told you how proud he was of you. Even though later they told you it had taken six hours, it felt like it took no time at all, Ransom holding your knees up to your chest and helping you push when you felt like you couldn’t anymore once the doctor had gotten everyone else out of the room.

“Almost there, just one more big push, mommy.” The doctor gave you a small smile when you nodded tersely, guiding the baby’s body out of you while you screamed. “Here’s the head, and shoulders, and here she is!”

The first loud cry from your daughter had you breaking down into the most joyous tears of your life, shaking in Ransom’s arms and beaming at him when he kissed you like you were the air he breathed. You had never been happier, sobbing and letting Ransom stand up so he could cut the cord.

“Oh, shit.” Ransom felt his own tears leaking down his cheeks when they bundled her up and placed her into his arms, laughing when she kept squalling and wriggling like a little fiend. “Bunny, she’s so beautiful. She’s amazing, I can’t believe we made her.”

“Let me see her.” You were still crying when he came to sit next to you, cooing when he placed her into your arms and leaning against him as he pressed soft kisses all over your cheek. “She’s so perfect, our pup. Amelia Clementine Drysdale. I want to give her everything, Alpha.”

“We will, I promise.” Ransom didn’t think such euphoria could ever be possible, gazing at you and then back at your daughter and knowing that he would do anything either of you wanted for the rest of your lives. “I will keep you both safe, nothing will ever happen to you as long as I’m here. My sweet Omega. I love you, Bunny.”

You purred and started scenting your pup while he wound you in his arms, peeking up at him through your lashes and feeling warmth bloom in your chest as you felt the deepest love and affection flowing through the bond, knowing that no matter what happened, he would always be your Alpha.

[collegetennisoriginstory]

I wanted to throw in my opinion on the Trans MC if you want it! Option 3 would be a lot of extra writing and coding, so I get that it wouldn't be a decision made lightly and it would be added pressure to get it right and it's a sensitive topic for sure. I will say that if you chose to go this route tho, it would make a huge difference and mean a lot to us. I'm a trans athlete, and the lack of representation can be really discouraging. It's time like these where we are receiving so much hate, especially when it comes to sports, that allies could really step up and make a difference. Reading can really open people's minds! It may be difficult and uncomfortable, and take extra work, but that's our everyday tbh. We out here living on hard mode 😂 that's just my thoughts on the matter but I will respect you and read your story either way. Much love 🏳️‍⚧️♥️

Hey! Thank you so much for sending this! This gets long, forgive my wordiness.

First off, I really feel your statement to the bone, the part about how allies could step up and make a difference, and how positive rep in media, games etc. is insanely important.

So many stories, TV shows, movies have shaped my experience of being queer and POC, and while some of them have been nice just so I could see someone like myself being represented, the ones that really made an impact are of course the ones where these identities were explored in a sensitive, thoughtful way. (When I watched Saving Face for the first time at 17, about a queer Chinese American doctor, I bawled my eyes out and dont think I've been the same since).

I would absolutely love if CT:OS/my IFs could do this for trans athletes too.

I've seen/heard so many worrying statements about trans athletes (both in real life and in the media)—and it makes me so sad.

Some that really get me really riled up are: The idea that a trans athlete's accomplishments mean nothing because they "have an unfair advantage" (or putting it down to "just hormones" or whatever instead of recognizing the hardwork, skill, and dedication behind EVERY successul athlete, trans or not). Or the idea that trans athletes shouldn't get to choose to be trans if they want to be athletes. Or the idea of policing trans athletes' bodies or forcing them to undergo surgery in order for them to be "valid"...

Well, FUCK THAT. FUCK those people.

If my IF can help celebrate trans athletes, and combat/shut down the really harmful (and ignorant) rhetoric out there? I'd love to do that.

But since I am not trans myself, it feels doubly, triply important that I wade really carefully here. I'd really need to spend time making sure I like and can stand behind what I'm putting out. I don't think it'd be responsible representation, otherwise!

I'm not really a perfectionist about my writing and that's how I make progress on my IFs while working a full time job. I'm more the... "slap shit tgt, get it out there, get feedback and edit if I feel like it" kind of writer. And I don't think I'd be able to finish CT:OS / Merry Crisis any other way. But when it comes to race, gender, and sexual identity? I really. Really. Wanna get things right.

(I rewrote that Rayyan convo about being a POC athlete with Deepal so many times haha and it was already marginally less scary, since I am a POC athlete.)

I guess what I'm trying to say is, I agree it's so goddamn important to have trans stories, and rep, especially in sports, where views are often so toxic and polarized.

But I don't think I know yet whether I see my IF being more a simple "yay, trans rep" kind of space or an actual deeper exploration of what it means to be a trans athlete. I was quite prepared to add the option to be trans (+ any accompanying scenes etc.) when I have the complete CT:OS 1st draft, but I was also toying with the idea of just putting something imperfect into the game earlier.

Faced with indecision, I've opted for: procrastination. I am still waffling, but it was helpful to hear what you guys think. Thank you so much for your message.

Lots of love, keep being awesome ❤️

[crookedkryptonitebeliever]

CKB hear me out. Haters will say it's fake but ....... blanche youngest child. The Victorian maid garb? He's tired of being in the shadows of those before him and is trying to set his own identity. Extreme violence? A big ol temper tantrum and cry for attention. I dare say i would lean on him being youngest child just because Lev fits the disaster middle child ALL too well 😮‍💨.

I see why some will say Lev as the youngest but i feel like he's suuuuch a middle kid like, even if he's stupid, he'd having a good time and that's all he cares about. I feel like youngests are actually more deceitful and tricky wheras middle kids are pretty true to themselves and more easygoing? Like them youngest kids are used to sneaking around and just so cunning, showing different faces (not unlike blanche who does a 180)

Like blanche, yves can also fit all 3 perfectly. He does kinda seem like the overstressed, overworked, will nag out of love, can never relax, will shoulder responsibility for you eldest child (i feel like eldest children also have a really clean aesthetic? Middle kids are either cozy wear or pop the Fuck off. And youngest kids are always flashy but in their own way and my god if that isnt blanche 💀)

Also i feel like eldest kids (yves) have a great fear or failure and losing things so theyre lowkey control freaks. Youngest kids (blanche) are oddly possessive and entitled like they think the last slice of pizza is their god given right. And middle kids (lev) are so used to losing things that they get obsessive over the things they do have, and a bit pathetic abt it if they feel it slipping away.

Youngest kid blanch really does seem like a big brat (but who cares) to me. Like he sees reader as his dead pet hamster that he accidentally squeezed to death trying to hug it but he refuses to believe it's dead so he keeps leaving food out for it and stroking it. Middle kid Lev sees you as a cute hamster and buys you cool wheels and a rolling ball and toys and sleeps with you in his bed. Eldest Yves will not allow anything to happen to pet hamster so he has a seperate temperature controlled room for it, homemade pellets, probably wipes hammies ass after it poops and everything.

This was just my random musing though and im excited to see what you end up making the order!!

Also i think i was ur 🐰 anon and i used to send in all those theories for language barrier LOL. Ummmmm the bunny thing *totally* didn't have to do with Lev, so, uh, don't tell Blanche, my latest hyperfixation 🤭 (or Cyprus because goddamn-)

🐰 anon

🐰 anon also said: Oh! Also feel like blanche would be a lot younger than the other two. Like modern au or whatever if they were all together, yves moved out when blanche was a kid (because he was independent) lev was never home bc he was always out and just kinda ended up living w one of his friends (never 'officially' moved out but he's living elsewhere) and followed the party life, and blanche was probably raised and spoiled by a family elder, making him feel like an 'old soul born in the wrong generation'. But hold onnn i didnt know therewas a blanche pt 2, lemme go read that and see if it changes things LOL 🐰 anon

🐰 anon also said: no blanche is actually so middle/youngest child coded it's insane bc i refuse to let go of middle child lev (actually i need to give bunny a reread before that too, and ofc more content on him when it comes out lol) but brooooo them youngest kids be weird as FUCK like, smth abt blanche feels like he's playing dressup, pretending and trying so hard to be this old fashioned adult gentleman, meanwhile yves actually is more calculated, composed and knows what to do for his shit. I actually initially thought of yves being the youngest but i feel like blanche being youngest fits so much better imo. Like blanche is just here to do his own shit, he's a bit selfish, and pushes for hinself. Yves puts his responsibility first and pushes for reader. Plus yves has that blonde mom in target drinking a coffee doing 3 hours of shopping in 12 minutes before her next hot yoga class and thats soooo eldest child coded. Idk something abt blanche as a person (not a character) seems so underdeveloped and child like in a disturbing yet innocent way? 🐰 anon

🐰 anon also said: "unromancable, unfuckable weirdo." No im sorry Blanche is actually the youngest child Bunny anon

Holy fuckin shit bunny anon always comign in with a banger , yess that's what im talking about them tasty brain chews i like i like

shid man like u really lay out their vibes and everything and even imagined them in modern AUs , presented evidence and cited your source like what the fuck this is such a good analysis like damn bro i fr appreciate the enthusiasm

Like all the stuff you sair fr made sense even to someone who has no siblings, its as if i had those little shits living in the same house as me and i observed the dynamic, like yeah damn Yves really fit the oldest child

Its really fitting cause if you think about it, they're all like centuries old or whatever and both Yves and Leveret are pretty youthful looking with no grey hairs- they went on their own quests to preserve their looks, Whereas Blanche is considered to be the most unkempt out of the three with his salt and pepper hair growing uncontrollably to the back of his knees, no manicures just natural long nails but he's still considered youthful cause ykno 50 year old looking man vs his actual 5 million year old age , but it just shows that he doesn't care about looking youthful as much as his older brothers

i notice the older siblings from other relatives and friends they tend to looksmaxx more than the younger ones. and they try to keep up trends, like Yves and Leveret is pretty modern whereas Blanche is fuckin ancient with his stuff, mannerisms and dressing up

and yes he is ironically the most immature (as in childlike) of them all, even tho leveret is like spontaneous and has his slipups, but damn bunny anon like ur analysis is always bangers like what the hell bro i love them and i love you

[crazylittlejester]

DAILY BRAINROT

I got jump scared by a pedestrian on my way to get groceries because I was thinking about this, and I don't have a good excuse because I am also a pedestrian.

Adding a "half out of control ADHD" disclaimer on this one.

I have been seized by the brainrot, and it is holding me hostage until I finish writing out Legend and Wild meeting for the first time in the vigilante AU, and that's why the next chapter of poor Hyrule's fic hasn't been touched today.

Legend gets to be happy in this AU because I think he's earned it. He's been around for like... basically forever, so he gets to have all the friends he wants. I am aggressively improving his quality of life here. I went to the effort of finding him a sandwich recipe (and honestly might try it myself because it looks tasty).

Back to the point, which is that I was thinking about what powers everyone would have in this AU when I was going to get groceries. It's a very tough question, and the fact that my area of expertise in high school was Marvel is not helping because there are too many options to pick from. So I only managed to work out the abilities for two of the boys so far, which is half the reason why I'm making Wild and Legend play nice with each other today.

Long story short, I decided Wild should actually get a copy-and-paste ability AND I HAVE A GOOD REASON, OK. I love love love the idea that the Shrine of Resurrection's Sheikah Juice stuff is actually liquid information and since I can, I figured why not just replace his blood with it or something?? It's fanfiction I can do what I want. So now Wild has blue Shrine Juice blood and is sort of partly like a computer I guess, which means he has the ability to copy "files" and store them in his "system memory." Which... actually kind of explains the amnesia, I guess. Had to delete a few "files" (memories) to make space for the new "files" (abilities/powers). Obviously I've got to put a limit on him otherwise he'd be WAY TOO POWERFUL, so I'm thinking that each "file" either has a cool-down period of 1x every 24 hours or he has to pick 1 power to use for each 24-hour period. This explains how the Champions' gifts and the abilities from TotK work, and it makes me feel Very Smart.

Legend is actually pretty boring in comparison. I didn't really want to have to pick between his numerous items, so I gave him a very basic enhancement ability with an emphasis on speed and agility in the legs so he can run around on top of buildings and do parkour. His power isn't anything special, it's how he uses it that's actually interesting because he's had to make up for being Very Vanilla. It DOES let him keep up with most people, though, with few exceptions. And I like this because I think it kind of does reflect on how he's not really a special person by himself and that his being interesting comes from his experience and knowledge and inventory. He's the guy who's been everywhere, done everything, and knows everyone, and that's where a surprisingly large amount of his flavor comes from.

I have a rough idea for Sky, but I'm not completely sold on anything for him, yet (because of the whole deal with Demise and all). I'm extremely tempted to make him think he's a normal guy when he just uses his Terrifying Prophetic Abilities in his sleep. Like, he thinks he probably sleepwalks so he tells Twilight and Warriors when he moves in and the first week goes okay, but then for the second week he is walking in his sleep and doing Crazy Shit while spitting out Creepy Prophecies about stuff. It's concerning, and they're trying to figure out how to tell Sky to go to therapy because he is An Absolute Ray of Sunshine during the day. (Maybe he just has remlit powers?)

Legend gets to be happy in this AU because I think he's earned it <- OBSESSED WITH THIS.

COPY AND PASTE ABILITY. I LOVE IT.

REMLIT POWERS ALSKDKDKD

dude oh my GOD i fucking love all your au’s so much, the insane amount of detail you put in em???? I eat it up every goddamn time. thank you for bestowing upon me your brainrot every day 🙏