#but the thought has occured

[testicularmanslaughtrr]

I miss quite a few people in my and I wish I had a way to say like...you're welcome back anytime.

Hi I've been in my feelings all day and had a long emotional talk with my best friend and I just.

I've been very fixated on the past's place in my future.

I am in a place where for quite a while, people leaving my life was very common. People come people go. I considered myself a fair weather person. Even my own family left me.

During an even darker time in my life I was like oh. I'm only around for as long as I serve a purpose. Once that purpose is up, I'm out.

Thankfully even if that was true, I like to think I don't live that sort of life where I'm just a commodity or a servant. That was a long time ago.

But looking at that, the people I've lost either thru anger or just....the natural sand of time. I wish I just had a way to send a very gentle hand written note that assures- you're welcome to say hi any time. You don't even have to stay long. But it'd be cool to say hi again.

I think the greatest wish many people with symptoms like me is the ability to reconnect, reunderstand, and keep growing in whatever direction life leads after that. I have so many friends from school or just past experiences, conventions, old group chats, etc. People I've lost contact with cause I feel like I can't hold a conversation. People that might still hate my guts. And I just wish I could be like

Door's still open. It never shut.

I've literally only ever blocked one person in my life and that guy was a fucking monster. While I believe most people are not beyond redemption, I have limits. Trick and use me, fuck you. Hurt others in unforgivable ways. I hope you choke.

Not the point sorry

I'm not getting any younger. I'm tired of losing people. Sometimes you can't help it and I have always been firmly in the belief that no one is beholden to me and no one owes me a damn thing. Live your life and live it well. But I still miss people. I miss people I have no business missing and sometimes I just want to randomly message them like "Hey. How have the last 10 years been?"

Sadly for that I know I can't. It's not fair to re-enter lives that don't want me. I just get curious. Did you ever get help? Are you happy? Do you still like homestuck? Have you traveled anywhere? Whats your current favorite song? Do you miss me too?

Idk. I'm growing sappy and sentimental in my old age.

Don't get me wrong. I love my friends more than the waking fucking world. These musings, these feelings, they do not at all interfere with me wanting to keep those I love close to my and make some of the best memories a person could ask for. Cause no matter how much I miss anyone, I'm not losing any of these people. Bet on that.

So what is this ramble for? Idk. I'm just a guy on the internet. But if you read it either you're waiting for me to be smart, which will never happen or maybe you're missing someone too. And it happens. You never truly realize the print someone left on you until you're airing out the laundry. So if you're missing someone, and you have the ability to reach out....fuck it. Just do it. Why not. Worst they do is block u. Then guess what, nothing really changes. Reach out and of the convo fizzles, same thing. Nothing changes, you made the attempt, and the world keeps spinning.

World will always keep spinning.

[see-arcane]

3/4 of the Dracula cast, including side characters: -takes 10 pages of yammering to get around to making a single point-

Quincey Morris, King of Brevity, reading the situation for 0.5 seconds: Uh huh, cool. So where’s the blood going? 

Jack Seward, in tears, both from the Lucy issue and gratitude at not sitting through another corn metaphor for half an hour: I don’t fucking KNOW-- 

[atrociousgargamelitis]

Do... Do you guys ever think that the reason Blitzø always wears those gloves is to hide his scars?

This is Blitzø normally:

We know he has scars on his hands:

Someone might say "Yeah well maybe he's just stylish and dripped out like that". Sure. Sure.

But then why would he still wear them with his formal "going to fuck Stolas" attire? (I mean, apart from the plot related thing where Stolas placed the Asmodean crystal on his glove)

Someone else might say "Maybe they have a combative advantage, maybe they're gadgets of some sort". Again, sure.

But then WHY WOULD HE WEAR THEM TO GO FUCK STOLAS?

Look at him. They don't match his outfit. They don't NEED to be there, there is no practicality. So, I think he hates his scars. If he can avoid seeing them, he will. Obviously the face ones he can't avoid seeing, but everything else? He hides. And if you look at his usual outfit, you'll realize that he hides as much of his skin as possible. Can you blame him? If you had a constant reminder that you lost EVERYTHING, your job, your family, your only friend, because of an accident YOU caused, you wouldn't want to see that all the time either.

I love Blitzø so much. PLEASE let him improve and find his peace. PLEASE.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

it's polite to maintain eye contact!!!!

[starry-bi-sky]

my body's aching like a knock-down drag-out

and my poor heart is an open wound A Childhood Friends Au snippet that very briefly delves into Danny's life post-accident. CW: Mild Mentions of Blood, Violence, VERY mild gore ig. Danny briefly recalls getting impaled during a fight.

------------

What they don't tell you about being dead is that it hurts. That it can hurt. That it can hurt more than when you were alive. That when you die, the emotions you die with stick with you like a leech that just won't let go. That emotions are ugly little thorns that stick their barbs into you and grow beneath your skin; or, at least, whatever’s left of it. 

Danny is familiar with anger. It kept him warm in Gotham, when his parents weren't home from work and he and Jason were crowding Crime Alley with their presence. It kept him warm in Amity, when the fresh sting of moving was still needling into his heart and he wanted nothing more than to rip and tear into the closest person next to him.

He's familiar with violence. With fights. With death. He's seen people die in Crime Alley probably every day. From overdose, from gunshots, from stab wounds; anything that can kill, rest assured he's seen it. He's familiar with getting his own knuckles rough and bloody when other kids turn and bare their teeth at him and Jason; they're all just starving dogs stuck in a fighting pit, primed and ready to rip out each other's throats. 

Black eyes, stomped hands, bloody noses. You name it; he’s had it. Gotham is paved with the blood of her children, and Danny likes to imagine that when he was born, the doctors handed his mother a file and told her; “Take it. He’s going to need it for his teeth.” 

Danny’s mom (and dad, for that matter) was too busy trying to keep him and Jazz fed, so Danny stole the file from her drawer with Jazz’s help, and did it himself.  

He’s familiar with anger, he thought he was getting better at it these days. It doesn’t come to him as easily as it did before. Of course, that was before Jason died. 

Danny is less familiar with grief. Caring kills and Gotham kills the caring, so Danny cares very little about other people. Or he tries to. But grief hurts. His grief hurts. It hurts too much. It hurts like a bug trying to crawl out of his chest; like a rat chewing a hole through his heart. Some days he wants to dig his hands into his hair and split himself down the middle. Some days he just wants to scream. 

He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead. 

He wants the whole city to hear him wailing, some days. It sticks itself in the back of his throat like bile, and Danny is one wrong retch away from letting it loose. It sticks in his lungs like all the tar he’s smoked in since he was nine. It pushes and aches at his temples, in his head, like his brain is trying to swell out of his skull. His thoughts becoming so loud they threaten to commandeer his tongue.  

He has no mouth, but he must scream. 

Something they don’t tell you about being dead is that it hurts. That it hurts more than when you were alive. Something they don’t tell you about being dead is that it’s violent. That it’s bloody. Or as bloody as it can be when everyone has no blood. 

Another thing they don’t tell you about being dead, is that it’s a lot like Gotham that way.

With no threat of death, Danny’s enemies forget death itself. Blood comes easy, like water, and teeth are encouraged. Bring your own fangs to the fight. Dying is something you can just walk off. 

Danny’s been dead for three months. He can’t say he’s been walking it off easy. He’s perfected the art of turning his nails into claws since his heart was still beating, but he can’t say he’s perfected fighting other ghosts. 

Scrappy is just not enough. 

He feels like he’s back in Gotham again. Back in her death-shroud alleyways, fighting someone bigger than him. But there’s no Jason to watch his back, and Danny has to get himself out of there alone. Or he might just not get up at all. 

Black eyes, busted lips. It’s familiar to him like an old scent, Danny isn’t quite sure that he’s missed it. It’s more familiar than his fights with Dash. 

But there’s no one else who can do it but him. Not Sam, not Tucker. He can’t lose them too. He can’t. He can’t. He can’t. His heart can’t take another break, he already feels like he’s going insane. 

With no threat of death, Danny’s enemies fight like death themself. He learns why when Technus puts a street sign through his stomach one day. It pins him to the asphalt like a moth pinned by its wings. 

Danny claws at the metal like how an animal caught in a trap chews off its leg, and every move is blinding pain. He thinks he was howling, but it’s hard to tell. He couldn’t recognize the sound of his voice. 

He bleeds green. It mixes in black with the pitch blackhole in his heart, which throbs and twists and cries in time with his reckless panic. The finger-choking terror of dying again strangles out the air he doesn’t need. His blood evaporates, only to reabsorb into him. It just bleeds out again, cycling like a snake eating its own tail. 

Danny breaks his nails clawing at the metal, and eventually gets it in his mind to pull it out. So he does, and the end drips ectoplasm green as he gets to his feet. In red-vision, Danny sends the sign back with snarling, vicious fervor. The pain is irrelevant in his rage.

Only after the fight does the hole the pole left start to close. Danny doesn’t shift human until it’s gone. Unlike other injuries, a scar stays behind. Ugly; mottled, it aches for a week with every twist and stretch his body makes. He hates it. 

Being dead is agony. 

Every part of him is in pain. Every step, every word he speaks, everything he does, it is prerequisite with pain. The body is temporary, but the soul is forever, and death has carved into it with its freezing green hands and left him with never-ending heartache. It has torn from him and stolen what of him it could, and in return it’s left him with sorrow. 

His pain is his grief, and he’s sobbed in the safety of his room more times than he can count. It’s still as fresh as the day he heard the news of Jason’s death. He knows, instinctively, that it will stay fresh forever. 

In his room, Danny shoves his hands over his mouth and shrieks in whatever, muffled way he can into his pillow. It’s not enough. It’s never enough. He needs to be louder. He needs to be heard. He refuses to be. 

Being dead hurts. 

[lady-tortilla-chip]

I think it’s crazy actually that people think it’s impossible for Chuuya to trick Fyodor without Fyodor having to be dumber for it. Especially when a popular theory was that after the drowning Chuuya had begun faking it, why is it so hard to believe he’d just been faking it the entire time?

This doesn’t even touch on how it’s been SUCH a LOUD point throughout mersault that Fyodor has hugely underestimated Soukoku. So, by obvious extension that would include Chuuya too if not more so than Dazai seeing as he insinuated multiple times that Chuuya was Dazai’s tool rather than equal partner.

[insomnya777]

hermitcraft au where literally everything is the same except redstoners are called stoners

[pippin-katz]

Okay I noticed something during the Red Room scene after watching RWRB for the "who knows how many"-th time.

When they hit the wall, Alex puts his right hand on it:

But then they cut and it’s not there anymore:

Now, I’m not pointing this out as an "oh look an editing error" or anything because that’s something that happens in pretty much every movie ever made. Somebody’s hand or leg is in one position, they cut to another angle, and it’s in a slightly different position. It’s what happens when you’re editing together several different takes of the same scene.

Hell, quick and fun tangent, feel free to skip ahead to where the text changes back to the normal color, but there’s a sequence in Clue, the movie, where Wadsworth, the butler, is retelling the events of the evening in very specific detail and reenacting it. This is a fantastic example of a moment where a very attentive viewer can see into the behind the scenes, and remember that when filming movies, they always do multiple takes of a scene, even if nothing went wrong; there’s only very unique circumstances where they film a scene and the entirety of the very first take is used.

Earlier, Mrs. Peacock freaks out because they think there might have been poison in the drink, and Mr. Green slaps her in the throat to stop her from screaming:

GIF from here.

After he hits her, he says this:

GIF from here.

When Wadsworth reenacts it later, he says the same line:

GIF from here.

Notice that he’s accurately in character as Mr. Green, but he makes the gesture to push his “glasses” back up, which Mr. Green didn’t do. Tim Curry went through great lengths for this very long sequence to get all the little details right. The only reason he would do that would be if he did push his glasses up, but it was in a different take. That take wasn’t used in the final cut of film, but they had to have filmed a version of the scene where Mr. Green pushed his glasses back up, and Tim Curry copied it because he wouldn’t have been able to predict which version of the scene they would use, and that’s a specific detail he wouldn’t want to miss if they used that take.

In the easiest and perfect scenario, they pick the best take of each shot and splice them together, but sometimes they use multiple takes of one of the shots and use different pieces of them. Maybe the delivery of one line was better in one take, but another line was better in the other. If there's going to be a cut between those lines, they can cut out the line delivery they liked the best and splice into whatever take they're using the most of.

This is common knowledge, but I'm covering it just in case someone is completely unfamiliar with how films are made.

When the camera angle changes during a sequence, it doesn’t mean that they filmed up until that point, stopped and repositioned the cameras and the actors, and then continued. They set up a camera for one of the shots, they run through the scene start-to-finish, and once they have several good takes to choose from, they move the camera position to the next angle, and shoot the scene start-to-finish again. Sometimes they can knock out more than one angle at once if the cameras won’t get each other in the shot.

For example, scenes like Alex and Henry talking on the couch, in the cafe, on the phone on the bed, basically almost any scene where they’re looking directly at each other, has to be shot from at least two angles separately, at least if they want to show us both of their faces throughout the scene. If they filmed both of them at once, you would see the other camera in the background behind the actors.

In the case of the kissing in the Red Room, there's three cuts, until the end when Amy walks in. I'm talking specifically about from Alex grabbing him up to the shot right before Amy walks in.

So starting there, we have the first shot:

Then the first cut:

Then the second cut:

Then the third cut:

Then Amy walks in:

Now, cameras do move and/or zoom during most shots, even if it's a barely noticeable. For example, there is no cut while Alex crosses the room; the camera moves with him. It also rotates/pans a bit once they start backing towards the wall to keep that shot connected up until the first cut.

Based on the angle, the framing, and their positions, I'm pretty sure these two are from the same shot/camera position, possibly the same take, with the close-up spliced in:

Even if they aren't from the same take, I'm fairly sure, like I said before, that they ran through the scene start-to-finish with this camera blocking, and that these are both from that blocking, even if the second one seems slightly different. It's really hard to be 100% sure, but when I watch them side-by-side, their positions seem to line up. If you map out their starting point and ending point, and the gap of time where the close-up is, it feels like enough time and movement for them to get from A to B in one shot had the camera not cut.

But the camera does cut, which leads me back to here:

The camera angle alone is a big indicator that they cut together multiple takes. I can't be positive, but I'm pretty sure that they couldn't have filmed this angle at the same time as the main shot.

I think about these sorts of things while watching movies; it's something I can't turn off in my brain. I'm hyperaware of the cinematography. I notice it, and thoughts/questions just bounce around in the back of my head.

Like if I was watching this for the first time, excluding all the internal screaming that would've been occurring, I would have probably thought: "Oh hey, that was a big camera change! They probably filmed this separately!"

But it's so brief and subconscious that I would've had the thought without those words actually forming in my head, does that make sense? It's like there's a little version of me chilling in my brain with a clipboard that writes interesting things down while the rest of me is screaming. He's just chilling, taking notes, and I can feel when he writes something down, even if I can't process it in the moment. Does that make any sense?? Whatever, it doesn't actually matter lmfao

What I'm saying is, while the camera change suggests the use of multiple takes being edited together, Alex's hand on the wall 100% confirms it, since it's not in the same position when they cut between the angles.

Which FINALLY brings me to my POINT!

Everything I went over essentially just proves that this shot:

-is from it's own, separate take than the other shots.

And as I explained, they typically run a scene start-to-finish several times from each angle, which is why there's this variation. With choreography like this that's meant to be spontaneous and aggressive is impossible to perfectly recreate each time. It happens too fast, and their characters are so wrapped up in the moment that they're just grabbing and touching each other however they can, so there is going to be variation between the takes in what they do with their hands or exactly how they kiss.

WHICH MEANS

It is very possible that there's a version/take of this sequence of events from the other angle where Alex's hand is on the wall, and he is half pinning Henry against the wall for this interaction.

His hand is in the classic "hands on either side of their partner's head while kissing against a wall" position that basically traps them against the wall and the person they're with.

So there's possibly a version of this shot:

-with Alex's hand pinning Henry against the fucking wall, before he lifts him onto the table.

And I want to fucking see it.

[thetarttfuldickhead]

Yes, but consider: Roy/Jamie hook-up parallel to Isaac's Roy/Keeley break-up observation.

Say Isaac and Colin's chilling by the water cooler, as you do, Isaac looks up to see their Coach and their CAM walk in, Isaac's eyes widen.

"Whoa, Roy and Jamie are hooking up."

Colin gives him one of his world-famous skeptical looks. "What? Who told you that?"

"I've told you before, bruv, it's body language. Just look at them: they won't look directly at each other but they keep sneaking glances and they're smiling. Yeah, Roy too, that's his smiling face. Jamie walking a little stiffly but's looking more relaxed than he has in ages." He grins as he sees the realization settle on Colin's face. "It's science."

It's a huge fucking mess for all of us if they fall out, but good for them and about fucking time, Colin has a moment to think before he needs to run after Isaac to stop him from telling the whole team.

(Maybe he makes it. Maybe he doesn't. Maybe it turns into a very weird and noisy morning for Jamie and Roy.)

[cuubism]

dear dreamling friends who like to write equestrian aus or medieval fics with lots of horse riding. as a person who's been working with horses for a very long time i feel compelled to share with you some things.

1 - hay is extremely scratchy and itchy. it is not comfortable to lie in. it is not comfortable even to touch. it is full of dust and tiny particles and it WILL get everywhere. in... crevices. please don't make the characters have sex in the hay unless you want them to suffer. hay is also usually packed in very tight, heavy bales, not big soft piles to lie in. straw is slightly better, i've found it to be a little softer, but it's still going to get everywhere. if you really want them to have sex in the hay, throw down a blanket or something, for the sake of the poor characters not getting tiny itchy hay particles in their junk XD

2 - when riding you don't really squeeze with your knees or thighs to ask the horse to move forward. i see this in fics all the time and it's my personal pet peeve XD. instead, you use your lower leg and heel, as well as the balance of your seat (how you sit in the saddle). the horse isn't going to feel your knee and thigh through the saddle as much as they feel your lower leg, which lies directly against their side. you do use your thighs for balance and steadiness. you actually DON'T want to pinch with your knee and balance that way. you might use your thigh a bit more if riding bareback, but even then it's really your lower leg, and your balance that the horse is responding to.

3 - riding two people to one horse isn't really feasible or safe. don't get me wrong, it's romantic and sexy and i've absolutely put that one in stories regardless XD but facts are there is not enough space in a saddle for two people. if riding double, one person is going to be directly on the horse's back behind the saddle - don't do this in real life, it's not safe and it's kind of unfair to the horse too, that lower part of their back near their hips is the weakest part of the spine. if you want the characters to ride double, bareback is going to be easier (still wouldn't recommend it in real life).

this is not a call out, just a few things i've noticed 😂 do as you like, it's fiction after all. if you have questions about horses or horse riding for things you're putting in your stories, feel free to hit me up

[jenna-louise-jamie]

it just occurred to me, martin wilby is the alex rider tv show's ash. there's a line in season 1 where the department is talking about wilby being responsible for ian's death and how ian “thought the world of him.”

very similar to how ash was responsible for john (and helen's) death, but john very clearly loved the guy. enough to make him alex's godfather and save his life. another very interesting parallel for the rider brothers.

ash and wilby are different to each other however. at least ash had somewhat more of a reason to join scorpia? a vendetta against alan blunt. wilby just straight up wanted money. yassen gregorovich stabbed both of them though.

[carpisuns]

he makes amity throw up in her mouth a little every day

Riley’s OG wolflow on twitter here >:)

[absolutely-not-my-main-blog]

Everyone says they love a devastatingly painfully slow burn romance until I, It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia—

[em-kgm]

ATLAS

[wickedcriminal]

I have been rotating aria of pride and deceit by @asthmaticbee in my head like rotisserie for several days and I'm still crying over this little angel in a red coat and his ungodly demon (affectionate) of an older brother

[pokemonshelterstories]

//just out of curiosity. if i were to open commissions to draw pokemon portraits over a photo background would anyone be interested in that