#but then u Do hurt them by doing that bc they assume you dont care anymore

[rebellum]

I feel like... Perhaps... Arguing that transphobia is defined by murder and that anything other than murder doesn't even matter... May NOT be conducive to fighting for trans rights.

Like... people want the right to exist as they are. They want to have access to hrt and surgeries and prosthetics. People want access to clothes that fit them and reflect how they want to be seen. People want access to medical care (eg. Getting screened and treated for sex-based forms of cancer can be impossible if you have the "wrong" sex listed to receive those tests). People want to be respected and treated well. People want to not be sexually assaulted and beaten and abused. People want to have access to housing and jobs, and the protection to not lose those things for being trans. People want access to shelters for homeless people or survivors of domestic abuse. People want name changes.

Acting like all of those things don't matter because at least they weren't murderered by an individual (and instead die of suicide or state violence, or survive and suffer) isn't okay.

[qulizalfos]

there is a gleam in your eye.

if you tell me i put it there i will shutter down so as to not blind you.

[astroyongie]

im going to guess these right this time mark my words

jongho? maybe its bc he seems to get not much control as he wants of his own life or image as other members get

2. yeosang?

3. wooyoung?

4. san? he doesnt like conflict of any sorts u can see rhe way he react to members shouting while they were drunk

5. i think this might be one of the "demon line" members hongjoong, san or seonghwa. maybe even wooyoung. theyre the members who put the utmost everything into their performances or certainly the ones i notice first among the group or lastly id say mingi he didnt, hes had mental health issues in the past and if it had been some time the issues could be more serious cause the mind can affect the body and vice versa. theyre definitely the members id be concerned about if they ever got hurt or seriously injured during their performances.

6. mingi? i wouldnt be surprised bc he seemed to have much drama or definitely seems to be the cause of a lot of drama for the members, second guess jongho? yeosang would be my third guess he seems to have a say it like it is personality and might not care how it comes across as or hwa in the past mightve been like that.

7. san? i hope not or hongjoong would be my second guess seems not easy to be leader of ateez or perhaps wooyoung, seognhwa?

8. seonghwa? he seems to be one of the more sociable members

if i give more than one name can you indicate which one id be more close to guessing?

is it because they are still quite a young in their early 20s age group? they havent yet found their footing or a way that truly works for them and their teamwork? despite the fact that the members each have something that seem to make them connect well with each other like the amount of water in their birth charts and the groups overall chart i assumed they had really good communication among the members but i guess not? ik this isnt always accurate so i do take tarot lightly yet at the same time sometimes these teas sound a bit concerning tbh but i wonder if other tarot readers havent picked up anything similar. will they find solutions? i dont want them to quit just bc of dramas among the group i really loved a lot of the stuff they have done so far and they got eons of time to do so more things with their image or their life.

thank you so much for this feedback !! I love to hear and read about your theories and how you guys interpret it so thank you!

without saying much for obvious reason you got only the 5 had one of the right names! still I love these thank you so much!

as for the rest, dont worry I am sure the members will figure it out! all groups have their lows and highs

[irrealisms]

jun wu or bwx for character asks? 👁️

starting off: hi yen if you're reading this it's got spoilers so pls skip this post ty <3 u can come back to it when u finish tgcf which at your current rate will be in like. a couple days lol

How I feel about this character

Im Normal About Him.

the ending is. perfect. the bamboo hat. it's never too late. when he's defeated he looks relieved. quoting myself from discord:

he cannot face being proven wrong, because it means he’s done terrible things and hurt people when he didn’t have to. he wants so badly to be proven wrong, because it means that maybe there’s good in the world and not just endless crushing pain and evil.

i have a lot of thoughts abt him & the tragedy of him & his entire ideology!!! i am sort of failing at condensing them but i have a lot of thoughts about him .

All the people I ship romantically with this character

hehe. xie lian (i am a sicko). i can also justify this to some extent--jun wu/bai wuxiang (i think mostly bai wuxiang, actually?) remarks positively on xie lian's appearance a notable amount, there's the "makes one ache, makes one excited" bit which i cannot read as anything other than Kind Of Weird And Horny, there's the thing where jun wu tests xie lian's virginity by making him bleed on jun wu's sword (i have another whole meta in my heart about swords as blatantly phallic in tgcf but i assume you do not need to be convinced of this lol)--but honestly i don't fully stand by it. this is a ship i have at least 80-90% because i am a sicko. i hope you can all understand

My non-romantic OTP for this character

ALSO xie lian. im complex. i contain multiple guys. the thing is that i have a beautiful google doc that consists of every time jun wu/bwx is analogized to a parent/teacher and xie lian is analogized to a child and it has . like. 30 quotes? somewhere around there? it's a lot! it's a lot. "i have decided that we are the same guy due to The Parallels but also i am going to enforce this and Make us the same guy by Molding You into Becoming Me" is an incredibly good dynamic whether it is slash or gen, and i do think the "weird forced adult-child relationship going on" reading is in fact more supported by the text than a shippy one. also when i'm not being a sicko about it there's also something deeply beautiful to me about their ending, about xie lian defeating jun wu but also showing him this moment of grace. and of course the Parallels which apply equally when it's slash vs gen. also you may have noticed that neither this question nor the last one do i bring up guoshi. this is bc idgaf about him. sorry mei nianqing . he exists i just Do Not Care

My unpopular opinion about this character

im gonna be so real i have no idea what is and is not popular wrt jun wu. what are the popular jun wu opinions.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

once again im kind of at the same place i am wrt mu qing of, like.... nothing, honestly? i am incredibly happy with what we got, i think it's beautifully written and the resolution is perfect, mxtx is a good writer and tgcf is a good book, no complaints

having a bit more of his backstory with mnq might be cool, i guess? we get the huge infodump but it's kind of just an infodump, it is just Pure Exposition, going into that a bit more / more naturally than "guoshi helpfully exposits for us" could be neat even tho i dont think its necessary. as mentioned i'm p much happy with what we got

(ask game, give me a character)

[imeverywoman420]

Being neglected as a child doesnt have many benefits but one of them is absolutely that i go through life assuming people dont care about me. Bc im either right or pleasantly surprised. Ive noticed specifically with like women in relationships with guys where theyre like “why does he act like this when he knows it makes me feel like x”and theyre SOOOO vexed and confused!!! and its like babe you have to consider that he literally does not care at all. Like occams razor the simplest answer is the best. But it just doesnt occur to them at all that someone doesnt see them as the center of the universe. Like hes hurting you not out of malice and cruelty but bc he doesnt care. Ur both 20 something and u have emotional issues and hes just some normie piece of shit guy. He knows ur just gonna cry and scream and shit your pants and not break up with him. You guys started dating when u were like 18 and ur like 21 now he obviously started dating you out of convenience and wont break up with you bc u keep threatening to kill yourself? Like HOW do you not see that!!!!

[plato-repulsed-culture-is]

sorry if this is a weird question, but um, a girl i know asked me out. Shes aplatonic but alloromantic and allosexual. I do like her back, but im a bit worried.. ive dated a guy before who didnt have friends and what ended up happening is that i had to support him 100% of the time when something bad happened and i had to be with him after school every day because i was the only person he talked to and he would get lonely otherwise. He even threatened to do bad things to himself if i went to a friend's sleepover because it made him feel bad. Im really worried that something like this would repeat... it lowkey traumatized me i think. Is this a valid concern or are aplatonic people different and they dont really need much emotional support compared to non-aplatonic people? Or was my ex just uniquely an asshole? Thank u so so much if u respond

I am prefacing this with a disclaimer that this blog was never for giving people advice, especially when they view aplatonics with such suspicion and are not actually asking any advice related to plato repulsion which is what this blog is about. I can also only go off of your statements here to draw conclusions, and I am assuming you are stating the truth here (especially as this is online, I know there is a possibility people can lie, but may also be telling the truth.). Also, we are not responsible for anything that happens to you emotionally or otherwise if you make decisions based off of this advice, because thats not within our control.

From what you said, your ex sounds like he was being rather toxic and manipulative towards you. That kind of behaviour is harmful (threatening self harm as a form of control, trying to control who someone spends time with, and not respecting peoples boundaries regarding interaction or emotional support, are all harmful actions.) and nobody should be acting that way towards others, we're sorry that happened to you. You also don't need to be concerned that someone will act this way towards you just bc theyre aplatonic. Your concern is valid, but it is in no way something that will inherently apply to aplatonics.

If you are concerned about whether this person has unmet social needs then you should just ask her about her social needs and emotional needs and what she expects in a relationship, and communicate about your needs and emotions regarding these things too. If its possible to, maybe mention that you have past issues or trauma in relationships which is why you want to be careful about dating, while not making it seem like aplatonicism is inherently a reason you think someone might hurt you(because it's not).

Set boundaries about what amount of time you want to spend with someone you're dating, and state your limits regarding how much you are okay with emotionally supporting someone / what topics you are ok with talking about / etc. . Don't assume that someone will be toxic or abusive towards you just because they're aplatonic. Its not really like your ex was inherently aplatonic just because he didn't have friends, and it may even be more likely he was alloplatonic.

Some aplatonics have and/or want friends but some dont, and moreover, if someone doesnt have friends by choice, that's very different from someone who is lonely because they don't have friends and mistreats a partner because of it. I will also add here that I don't intend to malign mental health issues just because it sounds like your ex may have had them (as you mentioned loneliness - which is different from just being alone or even liking solitude) ; mental health issues do not innately make someone abusive or toxic, and one can have mental health issues and still be respectful to people.

Someone without any mental health issues can also still very much be abusive or toxic towards others. And honestly, if you associate the concept of aplatonicism itself with this trauma then maybe its not in the best interest of you or the other person to date? And if it applies maybe it could be possible that you are simply not ready to date someone again after what happened, which is also okay, but I don't intend to assume that or be harsh in stating it as a possibility. I will also add that not having friends is not a 'red flag'. If someone has a preference to date/ be involved with people who have friends, that's okay, but not having friends is not inherently a 'red flag'.

Some aplatonics may not get lonely if they don't talk to people (but this can also be true of alloplatonics), and just because someone is aplatonic doesnt mean they will expect their partner to support them all the time to an unhealthy level or to an extent that crosses their boundaries. I will also add that there is no surefire way to tell whether someone will be abusive or toxic, although if they cross your boundaries or are disrespectful to you from the start, its worth staying away from them. Even ppl who are very kind to you initially may at some point abuse you or mistreat you, and theres no way to tell for sure whether or not this will happen because thats kind of how social relationships of any kind are.

But don't profile aplatonics as inherently more likely to be abusive or toxic (I don't know if this is intentional on your part, but hearing the word 'aplatonic' and making all these assumptions about how one may be in a relationship wounds like either this and/or like a trauma trigger extending to the concept of aplatonicism). Not all aplatonics even approach social relationships the same way, and even those who don't have friends are still capable of respecting boundaries in relationships they engage in. I wouldn't say that aplatonic people don't have emotional needs, but people in general have varying social needs and emotional needs. Some people who don't want friends may specifically not have a social drive towards having friends, but this may also apply to people who want friends.

If someone is happy without having friends then they probably don't seek emotional or social fulfillment from friendship. They may have other relationship types even if they are aplatonic (such as familial , romantic, sexual, alterous, etc.) (I don't know if you and this girl are monogamous are not but if you are intending to be monogamous that obviously is excluding sexual and/or romantic then) , and I will add that people don't always need social relationships/ bonds for emotional support. Some people may process emotions through journalling, or may go to a therapist, or such.

Some people may have people they talk to sometimes but don't call them their friends. Having friends does not ever guarantee anyone emotional support, and neither does any other relationship. It just so happens that a lot of people end up mutually (i.e. more or less both ppl give the other emotional support, it doesnt have to be equal so much as it is respecting the boundaries of both people. It is also possible that people may be incompatible in this regard) giving emotional support due to just being around people they are close to and also due to having some kind of emotional connection.

Anyways, long answer short, aplatonicism doesn't say anything about someone's social needs or emotional needs, and neither does alloplatonicism, and its often better to communicate with people you are close to or are looking to be close to, about important aspects regarding relationships.

(Also stating here that this is not an advice blog, we will be deleting any asks seeking advice from now on. If you want you can send in asks as reply to this response, as long as you aren't asking for more advice)

Anyways I hope it works out for you, whatever you decide to do.

(Additional disclaimer - to anyone who sees this post - do NOT suggest that 'narc abuse' 'borderline abuse' or whatever is real, do not imply mental health issues cause ppl to inherently be abusive, and do not treat having no friends as a 'red flag', regardless of platonic orientation or favorability)

[1863-project]

so for your poll abt abelism in fandom communities - i voted yes + reblogged but i will say i dont 1000% know im doing this right.

but for my experiences its been a lot of stigmatising of cluster b personality disorders. i have BPD which is already incredibly misunderstood/stigmatised but especially in fandom spaces where its "i headcanon x character w bpd" and immediately met with "no u cant bc ppl w bpd r evil and functionally not even ppl!!! all they do is hurt ppl they care about fuck them fuck ppl w bpd!!!" which

is incredibly harmful, as you'd imagine.

as well, i have autism and suspected schizophrenia and OCD (autism diagnosed, i am working on getting evaluated for schizophrenia and/or OCD) and fandom spaces can be incredibly rude to people with autism. whether it is schizophrenia related or not, i deal with extreme bouts of paranoia. fandom spaces also have a tendency to play into this - ie "joking" threats to be in my walls to hunt me down to kill me because i have a different fandom opinion.

its. alot. and i avoid most fandom spaces because of it.

Anon, I'm so sorry this has been your experience, because it absolutely should not be. This is the entire point of doing the poll and using the data to work on an essay - this behavior needs to be addressed and acknowledged as harmful.

I'm autistic with OCD myself, and this website is definitely bad to people with OCD. The misunderstanding of intrusive thoughts and how so many people become purity police and assume those intrusive thoughts actually mean you want to do something instead of understanding that they cause OCD folks extreme distress and anxiety is really, really harmful. And don't get me started on autism - I've been out in the real world doing self-advocacy for over a decade now, and the way a lot of people in fandom spaces treat autism is abysmal - there's even a lot of internalized ableism on that front, i.e. "I can't be ableist because I'm also disabled!" We all have internalized ableism to work through because of the world we live in.

Cluster B personality disorders and psychotic disorders get it the worst, though, with people treating those with them as "inhuman" and "evil" more often than not. No one is inherently more "evil" than anyone else. A personality disorder doesn't necessarily indicate that a person is bad. A psychotic disorder doesn't, either. BPD in particular actually makes a person very vulnerable to being abused due to the nature of how it works, but people love ignoring that part.

RE: people using your paranoia to send hateful anons, be really careful about what you share about yourself online. If you give too much information about what specifically can be used to hurt you, some people will absolutely do it. I know I may sound like an overly cautious adult to many of you (I'm 34), but when I was a teenager, we didn't put any personal information online in order to keep ourselves safe. If you aren't talking to people you really trust, don't necessarily share that information, because people are often cruel when they feel they can be so without any repercussions. Don't put all your triggers in your Carrd, don't make massive DNIs with all of the things that can hurt you in them - just use the block button and protect yourselves. Not everyone is acting in bad faith, and indeed, most humans aren't, but there are always some who will, and if they know how to hurt you or get back at you, they won't hesitate to hit where it hurts.

I'm sorry you have to remove yourself from fandom spaces just to feel safe, anon. It really isn't fair and you should be allowed to have a safe experience too.

[beaniebabyenjoyer]

1, 11, and 16 for newt + 15, 22, 23, and 27 for vince + 30, 31, and 34 for jamie (sorry if this is too many i just see u tag stuff as them a lot and im v curious abt them! u dont have to do them all if ur not up for it)

TY HEHE there's no need to apologize i absolutely LOVE talking about my ocs ^_^

Newt:

1: What’s the maximum amount of time your character can sit still with nothing to do? A long, long time. Newt spent most of her life alone in a swamp so she's used to a lot of downtime.

11: How do they cope with confusion (seek clarification, pretend they understand, etc)? She mostly just stays quiet and hopes/assumes another party member understands. Either that or she'll ask for clarification (usually this is for when i, as her player, is also confused KJFDSS)

16: What makes their stomach turn? Losing or letting her friends down. The thought that something is happening that she doesn't understand [this is currently happening in the campaign shes in lol]. Worrying that her god will abandon her and she won't have the magic she needs to protect her friends anymore.

Vince:

15: How do they speak? Is what they say usually thought of on the spot, or do they rehearse it in their mind first? She usually says what's on her mind unless she feels like its Personal or Compromising. She makes an effort to put off a confident, snarky, mysterious vibe but is pretty guarded when it comes to her own feelings.

22: How does jealousy manifest itself in them (they become possessive, they become aloof, etc)? Badly. Especially early on in the story, he can act pretty impulsively when he feels jealous or threatened and can end up hurting someone either by lashing out verbally or physically injuring or even killing someone. He gets a LOT better at this later though. He's still got issues but he's working on it :)

23: How does envy manifest itself in them (they take what they want, they become resentful, etc)? Similar to prev. It starts out as a villain in the story before it gets redeemed. It takes what it wants without any consideration for the people it hurts in the beginning and it does deal with a lot of resentment in its plot arc. but it gets better at dealing with that and its own emotions. eventually.

27: What causes them to feel dread? Her sire (she's a vamp, her sire is Awful and the main reason she is Like That in the beginning) and the thought of having to feel the guilt over the bad things shes done. It takes her a While to be able to let those emotions back in bc she dreads having to feel the remorse. She also has a lot of dread around losing people she cares about.

Jamie:

30: Who do they most regret meeting? GOD THIS IS A HARD ONE. He has a professor that kinda kicks the whole story off by introducing him to the supernatural world. Even though they are a big mentor figure to Jamie, i think he really regrets meeting them sometimes because it completely changed the trajectory of his life. He is now in infinitely more danger and has horrible, painful visions that drive the story. It's not what he expected his life to be like.

31: Who are they the most glad to have met? Yknow what it may be the same person. He has very complicated feelings about the prof. Otherwise probably Marcos :-) They're a really good friend to him and have stuck with him through it all. Also much later the answer might be Vince! She's kinda the worst to start with but post-redemption they eventually get together and vince eventually kinda becomes a weird wife guy :-) they love each other <3

34: How hard is it for them to shake a sense of guilt? Very, very difficult. He blames himeself for a lot of things, even things that are definitely not his fault. Somebody needs to get this guy a therapist.

If you wanna learn more about my Bite Club ocs and their story u can find my masterpost about them here!! I'd love to answer any more questions u have about them or just talk about them in general :3

You can also find out more about Newt here!

[perpetually-sad-but-its-fine]

chicago fire 11x08

herrman proving that hes just a grumpy old man is hilarious

kelly and stella just talking about the leadership conference and stella just assuming it’s men drinking scotch and smoking cigars?? 

*chefs kiss*

we love it

oh god

this thing with gallo and carver??

man please

i can't

oh that detective dude

not rlly sure how i feel abt him tho

carver istfg

don't do this

christ, hes doing this isn't he???

dude

cmon

goddammit carver

don't do this

COME ON

sylvie correcting him about the term for fear of clowns is great

oh wow

sylvie and this guy are funny

there are lightbulbs goin off in violet’s head and i cant tell if its bc she wants to set sylvie up w/ this guy or if its smthing else

oh my god its EVAN

oHHH

that was a clean connection

oh she's gonna set them up isn't she???

stella sensing the tension like ‘my mom senses are tingling’

herrman further proving that hes a grumpy old man

oh god now hes talking about gen z

this is gonna be interesting

‘they have no respect for safety, stop signs, or basic common decency’

that's bc most of us just don't care for our lives anymore but go off ig

ritter just being the embodiment of gen z is fantastic

‘you know what i'm saying’

‘i don't actually’

‘doesn't matter!’

heS JUST A GRUMPY FATHER

ITS SO CUTE

kelly and pryma

how's this gonna play out???

severide playing ‘fire cop’ again

why do i feel like pryma’s the dirty cop??

i don't feel too good about this

oooo

here comes violet to set up dylan and sylvie

oh poor violet

i still can't believe evan is gone

i don't like this

stella’s mom senses are tingling again

‘scarecrow’

‘cowardly lion’

‘what?’

mouch’s genuine concern for herrman is hilarious

uh ohhhh

gallo’s in T R O U B L E

i fuckin knew it

her moms senses

they worked

oh god

this thing again

look

gallo

cmon

stella

please just yell at him

GIRL WHY TF ARE YOU STANDING THERE SO SILENTLY

stella and kelly domestic moments

adorable

we love

even tho the convo isn't the most pleasant

pryma is dirty

i can feel it

ooooo

DYLAN’S HERE

oh hes gonna ask her out

awww

im low-key kinda loving this

oh

sylvie 

say yes

please

plEASe

hes cute and hes sweet

but at the same time

i still want matt to come back

violet lurking around the corner is me

sylvie

please call him

herrman

tf are you doing??

that's not gonna fool--

oh shit wait

why do I feel like this isn't gonna end well

i fuckin knew it

mouch and herrman being besites

we love it

oh no

stella and carver

what's gonna happen here

‘that was just a miscommunication’ my ass

stella

put an end to this

‘mutual understanding’ sure

whatever you say

this beef b/w carver and gallo’s gonna interfere with this call, isn’t it?

this guy IMMEDIATELY going to mouch

i don't like him

nope

‘lady lieutenant’ 

bro

dont try to fix it

u already fucked up

gallo’s look when he got the balcony idea made me laugh, idk why

CARVER

FOR FUCKS SAKE

KIDD KNOWS WHAT SHES DOING

gallo’s little smirk

nows not the time man

uh oh Gallo

TW: SUICUDE. DO NOT READ IF YOURE NOT COMFORTABLE. SCROLL DOWN UNTIL YOU CAN SEE THE NEXT BOLDED PART.

what's gonna happen here??

i don't like it

oh no

this is a suicide

oh no

ohhhhh noooooo

he’s gonna jump

goddammit

noooooo

this isn’t gonna end well

i can feel it

what?

he’s made mistakes?

tf is he talking about

is this somehow linked to pryma?

oh no wait its not

nvm

god this real talk is killin me

is this gonna work??

i hope it does

oh this poor guy

god please don't do this

carver and gallo better work this out

god he’s still gonna jump isn't he

HE JUMPED

OH MY GOD

I FUCKIN KNEW IT

NOOOO

ALL CLEAR. ENJOY THE REST OF MY CRACK REVIEW AND STAY SAFE. I LOVE YOU ALL. *mwah*

oh poor gallo

poor poor gallo

this is hurting me so badly

who is this chief???

can you not see the pain on gallo’s face???

oh violet

youre so sweet

oh goD

WHY DO THE CHICAGO FIRE WRITERS DO THIS

WHY

WHAT FOR

THEY KEEP HURTING ME

violet and sylvie supremacy

mouch and herrman back at it again

pryma again

i don't like this dude

this is gonna be a constant thing, isn't it??

its gonna be there throughout the season, isn't it??

i. do. not. like. this.

oh god Gallo

take care oF YOURSELF

PLEASE

also

where tf has joe been this entire episode???

carver if u don't help

istfg

ill kill you

ritter would be such a good friend

gallo

don't push him out

please

carVER

HELP HIM

gallo

accept the fuckin help

thEY COULD BE GREAT FRIENDS

CMON

the scar has smthing to do with his family doesn't it

gallo don't be mean

good

carver

good

uh oh

what’s gonna happen

LMAOOO

HE RAN THE STOP SIGN

BROOO

*cackling sounds*

THIS IS EVERYTHING

TRUDYYYY

i love the dynamic b/w trudy and herrman

aHHHH

SYLVIE

bro how does she look so beautiful??

i don't understand

she’s so PRETTY

ahhhh

this is so sweet

kidd and severide making dinner

domestic bliss

pryma

kelly’s just done

and stella’s throwing the attitude look at pryma

oh that's not gonna happen

I FUCKIN KNEW IT

NO CHANCE IN HELL

oh fuck off pryma

leave them the fuck alone

oh god

gallo and carver

awww they’re so sweet

bro

i don't think this is gonna end well

oh wait

it might

oh poor gallo

carver and gallo

why am i invested in this dynamic???

carver is being sweet

i love it

are we gonna get a story about his scar yet??

awwwww

stop this is sO SWEET

AND ITS HURTING ME

awww

stop that's adorable

[perfectlyripeclementine]

hey the previous anon here, i still hvnt found anyone 🥺

it is so interesting tho bc like bc of my body dysphoria i would never really care about myself. like im not a stone top by any means but i didnt really care about my body either tbh. but with my ex it was kinda the first time someone Wanted to show me that they find my body attractive even if i dont but didnt make it into a whole "but ur boobs are great why would u want to get top surgery" and actually like...did it right if that makes sense. and then it got to a point where i was the horny bitch touching myself as she is on the phone talking about work and to this day idk how i got here but oh well jfkdmdj

anyway i still am very touch starved and manifesting someone to come fuck me.

part 2:

hi again the same anon. imma go with 🦄 if thats not taken djdkdmjd

anyway now i cant stop thinking about my ex and how she made me feel so wanted and i will never forget how the first time we were making out she dipped her fingers inside me and than licked them clean and i think i died a little. i love doing that but no one had done it to me (not to bash my other (very limited) partners they usually just assumed i would be uncomfortable with it and i didnt really know what i wanted at the time either) and how it was the first time and how she was not even like actually looking at me and just savoring the moment and how afterwards she said "ive been wanting to do that for so long now" aaaaaaaaa i die

hi sweet. yes, the unicorn is all yours 🦄

I’m sorry that your breakup has left you feeling at odds with your own body. I hope you remember that even if she helped you become more sexual comfortable with yourself, your and your body’s pleasure are ultimately yours. a gift that she gave you is that you better know how to access them, and even though it really hurts to miss somebody (trust, i know), that’s yours to keep now.

it makes total sense that you want someone who thinks you’re hot as you are but also doesn’t have specific expectations of how you should or shouldn’t want to treat your body. i promise there are others like there who will also find you attractive and also be excited to see you change and come into yourself as you choose to. there are many weirdos, and also many people who are well-meaning but may not know how to navigate some of these questions. and there are also lots of people who are curious and excited and wanting to better understand their own pleasure like you.

mmmmm that sounds like a really hot memory. ❤️‍🔥 that sounds incredible. i’m sure it feels amazing to touch you that way, and know that feeling of relief when you finally get to push into someone you’ve been wanting to for so long. it sounds like that really opened some doors for you and now you’ll know how to talk to other partners in the future, and what to ask for.

i’m sorry this relationship ended, i know how tough it can be to lose someone who was really affirming. but it sounds from what you’ve said that this was just the beginning for you. manifesting someone to fuck you and enjoy you like you deserve 💕

in the meantime, while i don’t feel comfortable directly sexting anons on here, you are welcome to drop fantasies in my inbox if that’s fun & hot to you, and i hope that you keep exploring what works for you through tumblr and whatever other platform works for you.

[fxirybun]

are there really multiple physical versions of ourselves? not just dopplegangers but u could be different to how u currently are but this version of me seems the only version and it sucks cause i feel like people dont know how to reciprocate what i expect them too if im upset at them they dont like it if im happy they also dont like it if i remember something someone did guess what? they dont want to remember their past behaviours.

so i feel like sometimes this is the only version of reality there is because I havent seen anyone be any different and I have kinda been stuck in this reality because ppl dont want me to thrive cause no matter what I try nothings been a success for me thus far. so im wondering now if theres another reality where I mightve had more success or maybe different type of parenting where they couldve had more empathy lmao it seems a common theme in people lacking basic understandings of problems they cause for others that still affect others later on. i often am told to just "get over something" yh bc they have such a great social circle but i dont. sorry for ranting but im stuck and i dont feel comfortable reaching out to people in current times cause i feel like many folk are mainly fragile egoists who only want to benefit themselves. they dont care if they hurt someone or prevent an opportunity or make it about themselves. have u had such experiences?

that reminded me of the egg theory that i stumbled upon on tiktok. we can't expect someone to treat us fairly these days since most of the time they'll usually focus on themselves whilst they can and would do anything to take advantage of someone in order for them to gain something.

i came to a realization back in middle school that people will only treat you poorly if you degrade or underestimate yourself. i remember letting myself be secluded from my peers due to my low self-esteem and how it reflected it based on how i showed myself outside. this led others to assume that i'm shy or weak which was considered a "bad image" during that time. because of it , i ended up receiving poor treatment and just like you i feel frustrated since i didn't do anything wrong to them.

when i decided to change myself and did it the other way around that's when i'm receiving the treatment that i've wanted: to be respected. there would be an instance wherein i cannot keep up with the persona i made outside my small bubble since i'm an introvert at heart and i tend to be an awkward person. when i'm with someone alone it would be dead silence unless there's another person around who knows how to start a topic. it bothered me at first but i got used to it due to me embracing this side of myself.

did i regret doing it ? not at all since i know how to balance it + i get to recharge my social battery once i'm in my room. humans are known to be social creatures and cannot stand alone , i learned it the hard way. this is one of the reasons why i socialize with everyone because it's hard to be by yourself especially in times when you need help. moreover , you also get to meet other groups of people who are on the same vibration as you along the way ^_-

to conclude , there's still a way to change the version of yourself in this reality ! if i can do it , then so can you ⸜( ◜࿁◝ )⸝ there's a trial and error on my part but that didn't stop me from committing it because i don't want to live in this vicious cycle. i also learned back when i was 14-15 ish that i'm the only person who can help myself and that i cannot rely too much on someone in other situations. it is my problem that i need to face , not theirs since they're not obligated to it + they have their share of problems too that they need to take care of.

i ended up not giving a fuck as to what people may think of me because , at the end of the day , i'm the only one who knows myself better. thank you for sharing how you currently feel anon and hopefully my food for thought made you feel valid or provided you some kind of comfort or such ∩(´∀`∩)

[slowpokedragon]

try listening to the actual trans women who having been saying for so long now it hurts them and is not helpful for their community to keep pretending they are the single most oppressed and threatened and weakest community in the entire queer population and every one else needs to defer our fear and victimization and needs to theirs. "trans women have always had it worse" if this was true wouldn't trans women also have the highest rates of sexual assault, which they dont? or the highest rates of suicide, which they also dont? wouldnt they have no platform to speak about their struggles, which they absolutely do have? stop pretending to care abt trans women so you can whiteknight and self demean yourself and so many other trans and otherwise queer people. she isnt gonna fuck you cuz you pretend her life is the most horrible way to live in the history of humanity.

ok first of all relax lmao. i am not trying to whiteknight or anything. i am happily married (and it says so in my bio! imagine that, reading a quick little blurb before you send messages like this in someones inbox), and the fact that you immediately assume that i am trying to, idk, get something from trans women instead of thinking, "hey, maybe this person is just misinformed!" says a LOT abt you.

second of all ik my knowledge of the oppression transfems face is surface level, and ik that solidarity is the most important thing overall. i originally even got all these asks bc i was complaining in the tags of a diff post that i feel like transandrophobia is a divisive term that causes more harm than it solves BECAUSE it makes an "us v them" mentality instead of, oh idk, helping us all stand in solidarity of our experiences?

maybe dont jump down a strangers throat and assume shit that isnt true, pal. all ive done is talk abt the things ive seem transfems talk abt, which is the struggles they face and how they get no benefits from either passing or not; ik that trans men only get superficial benefits to passing as cismale, and i also know that i accidentally divorced race from the topic and acknowledged my mistake in the notes of that ask. (ie trans men getting shit from cops bc they pass as a man of color, etc.)

so, you know. have u considered that i am perhaps someone who does actually care abt trans women and is trying to help the only way i know how + the issue wasnt even originally abt that? have u considered that not everybody can be the worlds most well read person on queer discourse, and that some people can be stupid and wrong even when theyre trying to help? you talk about solidarity but then spit in my face for making a couple mistakes. but hey, solidarity only exists for ppl who do everything perfect the first time, i guess? god forbid somebody have struggles w assimilating info correctly! god forbid somebody (gasp) make MISTAKES in their solidarity and support!

ive also got my own thoughts on statistics, and how often things go underreported bc going to the cops literally doesnt help like ever, and how often statistics of queer ppls experiences are incorrect, but w/e. anyway, come off anon next time if youre really so certain of yourself.

[misqnon]

i stopped reading usosan fanfic for this (actually i was happy to stop bc it was smut and i wasnt in the mood to read smut but was too lazy to look for non smut)

I KNOW.. PLEASE .. why does only sanji get to be free .. im so sad for them. reiju the literal (former) child soldier and pudding with no one to care for her and love her. i assume theyll come back in the cover stories. .. please oda... pls..

"UR RIGHT NO SHAME….PUTS MY YAOI PROUDLY ON THE FRIDGE" YEAH!!!! YEAHHH!!!!

NOO AHDNSBF.. i can relate though i always do exactly what im warned not to do

"it was all me. next i will be asking the size of katakur- [gunshots]" NOO HOW COULD THEY SILENCE U LIKE THIS ... dont worry I'll ask in ur place

u cant put improper french in ur fanfic!!!!

reading the water 7 arc when usopp splits always kills me inside... it hurts so bad. i hope that if/when sanji and zoro fight, its THAT emotionally impactful. like all the hidden meanings and . angst.. i want good angst. if they do actually get into a fight To The Death, i dont think anyone but luffy could stop them. i could also imagine theyre fighting to the death and like . what stops them is someone in the crew is put into mortal peril and theyre forced to work together (bc that's always how it goes). what they should actually do is sit down and talk about their feelings... with a mediator perhaps....

"but why does shuggy feel like one of the most likely to me." IT DOES TO ME TOO!!! like the subtext... is there... it is so much There.

"that is canon shuggy to me. oda doing it kinda halfheartedly in a roundabout way for laughs but the fandom is popping bottles (we popping the BIGGEST bottles when shuggy happens tomorrow-)" YEAH i think even if this is the case its a win. canon gay old guys??? who have been pining after each other (well mostly shanks pining after buggy) for what .. 25 years?? that would be amazing..

"do u think zoro will get more development of him as a character by the end of the story?" i do!!! i think he needs a bit more depth tbh. like he is a wonderful character and im not saying he should have a sadder backstory or something but. to me rn i think hes a bit more two dimensional compared to the rest of the crew. like yeah simplicity is wonderful but i think to me hes less.. of a simple character.. and more like a character that needs to have more emotional highs/lows. i know i could love him so much more if i just ... knew him better. anyways i think its coming bc there have been some realizations involving his character? backstory? recently. and i assume oda knows that he could use more emotional depth. stoic and aloof characters are fine but i think the real appeal is when u get to see into their mind for a second and understand who they really are as a person

sexualize him to the point the audience wonders if hes actually a woman

thank u for watching my 4kids sanji video. i actually have like 5 videos saved of trace heatfist because he is so weirdly attractive in the 4kids dub but i will spare u. also idk if uve heard 4kids luffy but imo his voice is way better than the funimation dub???

"WHILE CONNECTED to a GIANT PROJECTOR…THIS briefly flashed on the screen before i frantically clicked away. no one saw but i. i did." this is EXTREMELY FUNNY. i really enjoy embarrassing stories because i find my own embarrassing stories very funny (when i tell them to other people)

brainwash everyone into believing sanji one piece is gay in SOME way.. ur doing gods work

i love how not normal u are about him

"(nodding) no go on what animal parts" see if u had read dungeon meshi i could reference it and everything would be so much easier, BUT YOU HAVENT /lh /teasing

ok but i have been obsessed with animals since i was a kid (especially lions and wolves (special interest go brr)) so probably lotta lion parts... because theyre cooler looking than wolves. and also just give me wings for good measure. i want to fly. nevermind that wings are meant for lightweight creatures. these are magic wings. its one piece..

i saw u post abt nightcrawler and i was never really into x men but hes pretty

i stared at the law comic... for.... like... 10 minutes.... rhank u ... for putting that onto my . feed

YEAH HES 6'3. actually hes the shortest warlord, tied with boa hancock. 6 feet tall is short in one piece

"gay art markets" already intrigued.

THATS SO COOL AJJDHSDJ.. i have been to a few anime cons and i dont remember?? ever seeing any law's??? its very sad .. i went the year before last year i think. i did see a huge furry one time (at the anime con). they looked like they were 7 feet tall. it was really exciting. and intimidating. that weird mix of the two. i am 5'3 for reference.. like wow. u are huge.....

"i love ur insane thoughts pls continue to share."

"i will do the same someday when i am less shy and ashamed of my unhinged fandom thoughts" pls do!! share ur own!! (when ur comfortable!!) i will not judge .. this is a judgement free zone. and also a shaming free zone

"such as making zoro amvs to abba in my head on the way to therapy." u are so powerful...

"thats a line my therapist actually said in response to something i did once." ur therapist sounds cool wtf. i never got a cool therapist

YEAH I SAW PPL TALK ABT IT SO I RECOGNIZED THE POSSIBLE CROCODILE.. i saw someone say croc was gonna be... some white dude.. and internally i was crying.. how could u do that to him

thank u for ur sacrifice

(watched the video) omg its prozd!!!! i love stuart.... Stuart.. stuart little.. ???? no wonder he got along with mice

YEAH I HEARD THAT TOO?? LIKE WTF IS HAPPENING... its cuz crunchyroll is funding ...

did my meme image come off as ambiguous. i asked my friend if it was ambiguous and they said no.. but i had nothing wlse....

robin canonically having touched (crushed) franky's balls for an extended period of time is so weird to me. thats what i think abt when i see naked franky..

p.s. i will add u there... my discord is something like. stupid.. stinky... or something... i dont remember. u saw the doflamingo snail just remember that. oh wait i also have my name as my name. ok. i forgot about that.

send me ur sanji pics .

rowan i am honored 

ok that gives me a question tho. i feel like u mentioned sanuso before and im curious. do people?? have ships with characters in them that they dont like?? like before i converted u. i feel like i could never like a ship that had a character i disliked in it. or at the very least i would grow to like both the characters

THE COVER STORIES i didnt think about that!! yes…oda please…i know u havent forgotten about reiju bc u put her in that one really fruity chapter cover with tashigi for some reason…

to all the haters that i dont have….but my silence. for $5,000 a month,

APPARENTLY NOT the french in my fic is all now double checked….to my embarrassment 

TRUE IT WOULD BE LIKE THE USOPP SPLIT…and yea. that moment WAS a lot. i think i teared up. there are a lot of “crewmate almost leaves the crew” moments and i think a fight between two strawhats (which has also happened before! but usually at least one of them is luffy!) could feel similarly. i like ur interpretation of how it could go too…there’s this trope in zosan fanfics where robin ALWAYS is all up in there business trying to mediate them and i both love it and hate it lmao. like yea she probably would notice but also why does she always gotta be ur guys’ therapist….and in canon. for a moment like that. it would probably have to be luffy wouldnt it??

oda: haha guys i made buggy gay isnt that Funny

the fandom: [hooting and hollering]

I AGREE COMPLETELY ABT ZORO. HE DOES NEED JUST A BIT MORE EMOTIONAL DEPTH. MAKE HIM GO THROUGH SOMETHING…stoic and cool characters REALLY DO need a moment where they ARENT STOIC AND COOL to be more well-rounded…and zoro hasnt really gotten that since that one time he cried at baratie like a thousand chapters ago (literally). and that was a very brief moment. he and robin can be similar and enies lobby is what made everyone love her more…when is zoro’s enies lobby. i dont actually need an entire arc like that for him (i mean i'd love that but i dont expect it) BUT AT LEAST GIVE HIM SOMETHING!!

“sexualize him to the point the audience wonders if hes actually a woman” already there babes 🫡 just doing my part

DID. DID THEY ACTUALLY CALL HIM TRACE HEATFIST IN THE 4KIDS DUB…ARE U SERIOUS RN…IVE NEVER HEARD THAT BEFORE PLEASE SAY SIKE. i just looked up luffy’s voice as well AND I LIKE THE VOICE ITSELF A LITTLE BETTER?? BUT THE VOICE ACTING IS….HM. 

THE GALLERY I WORK AT IS SUPER CHRISTIAN I THOUGH GAY SANJI WAS GONNA GET ME FIRED ZJBFVHDCSKJ it was. it was so funny afterwards tho. i will share embarrassing stories like my life depends on it

“i love how not normal u are about him” 

IM SORRY MY FRIEND KEEPS TRYING TO GET ME TO READ DUNGEON MESHI BUT IM TOO BUSY READING ONE PIECE 😭😭😭 lion…and wings…so u want to be a griffin 👁️

not 6’3 and shortest warlord. dkjnvkjnfvkj

i love the gay art markets. also NO LAWS?? I THOUGHT HE WAS SUPER POPULAR…DIDN THE BEAT OUT ZORO IN THE POPULARITY POLLS ONE TIME

“i will not judge .. this is a judgement free zone.” WRONG bangs my sanji gavel. 

my therapist IS very cool she makes fun of me but in a good way and also makes me laugh. and i make her laugh. bc i am ridiculous. i got very lucky

i dont think theyve made any casting choices for s2 publicly yet so…we will See..

STUART KILLED ME but so did “HIS NAME IS LUFFY! THAT’S Monkey Luffy” its been playing in my head. also sanji’s love for mice/rats makes me fucking insane bc its the cutest thing on earth. that scene where he’s completely enamored by a rat that’s sitting in a woman’s shirt and he is completely ignoring the woman. for the rat 😭 SANJI LOVES MICE MORE THAN WOMEN CONFIRMED-

no but i saw clips of that scene and about cried. same to that mouse wedding he attended in a drawing request oda did kfnvkjd. can u imagine the first time they get rats in the galley and they’re all expecting sanji to freak and kill them and then they walk in and he’s made them tiny stir fry and is calling them cutesy names. they would be like. 😮

also all the fan content ive seen where ratatouille is his favorite movie. ANYONE CAN COOK!!!!! 😭

AMBIGUOUS?? I DONT THINK SO? I liked it. we turn a sad into a frrAAANKKYYYYYYYY

and god i try not to think about it but also. ROBIN WHYYY WAS THAT THE FIRST THING YOU THOUGHT OFFFF SHE IS INSANE. SHE’S SO WEIRD.  

EVIL(ER) CROCODILE NX KJDC

I ADDED U ON DISCORD!!!! sanji pics…breathes in…i will add a couple more here but. should i send some on discord as well. is that how i break the ice. images of sanji with his ass up in the air (my collection)

also check out how much this dude can cry!!! (laughing but also crying):

[zvdvdlvr]

reggie fluff alphabet? 👉🏻👈🏻

ғʟᴜғғ ᴀʟᴘʜᴀʙᴇᴛ

ʀ.ʙʟᴀᴄᴋ

warnings: mentions of death

readers pronouns: unspecified i think

A = Admiration (what do they absolutely adore about you?)

Reggie adores anything about you. He appreciates that you never force him to talk, or make him feel bad about his feelings and weaknesses.

B = Body (what is their favorite part of your body?)

h a n d s . he adores everything about you, but when you brush hair out of his face, or massage his shoulders, he can't help but favor your touch more than anything in the world.

C = Cuddling (how do they like to cuddle?)

ok but reggie is little spoon religiously. he 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘴 when your big spoon cuz you play with his hair and press kisses into his neck and telling him you love him and you'd do anything for him and he just loves how he can be vulnerable with you.

D = Dates (what does their ideal date with you look like?)

picnics, picnics, picnics. bby loves being outside with you. he prefers going out at dusk/night, but he's down for whatever

E = Emotions (how do they express emotion around you?)

by talking or physical contact

F = Family (do they want one? If they do, when?)

i think it really just depends on you. i don't thing reggie would care, and if tou did want kids, adopted or not, he would try to give them the absolute best childhood, as he didn't have a particularly good one lol

G = Gifts (how do they feel about gift giving? What are their habits when it comes to this?)

reggie def spoils yo ass, you can argue with a wall if tou dont agree with me. when he gives you stuff, he normally just sets it (assuming its something that can go in a box of sorts) in front of you and watches your reaction and his face fucking splits open when you like what he got you bc he is so proud that he made his darling smile so big.

H = Holding Hands (when/how do they like to hold hands?)

most of the time you have to go for his hand, because he loves affection from you, and you specifically, but he understands if/when you don't want physical contact. if you do hold hands, he always gets a little excited so he laces your fingers together and cant help kissing you knuckles every so often

I = Injury (how would they act if you got hurt?)

he would need help helping you becuase he is absolutely infuriated at whatever or whomever hurt you. he wouldn't trust himself to help you by himself if it was sirius (im sorry) because his hamds would shake a lot. idk its hard to explain

J = Jokes (do they like to joke around with or prank you?)

if reggie is feeling good on that day, oh f u c k y e a h. its normally just harmless pranks though, nothing Maurader sized.

K = Kisses (how do they like to kiss you?)

tongue, tender, breathtaking. boom. e nuff said.

L = Love (how do they show you they love you?)

by 1.) showering you in everything and anything you desire 2.) by outright telling you 3.) by affection or some smexual contact

M = Memory (favorite memory together?)

the first time you really played with his hair.

okay, so, let's say we're at Hogwarts for this. regulus's day was not it. he was on edge, depressed, and snappy. you came to his dorm (whenever the hell u had time, ig) and were all like, "hello, my beautiful gorgeous amazing beautiful darling, is there anything i can do for you???" all he really wanted was you. so you climbed into his bed, and he let you lay on your back and he pulled your legs on his shoulders and rest his head between your thighs (in a very non sexual way). your hand slithered (slithered lol im sorry again) into his hair and he let out s9mething between a groan and a mewl when you scratched gently at his scalp and tugged at his hair (gently ofc bc i feel like reggie kinda has sensitive hair. is it just me???). he fell asleep and kinda groaned in his sleep when you did that because O H M Y F U C K

N = Nightmare (what is their worst fear?)

easy. you leaving him and completely fucking obliterating his heart, or you being siriusly(i cant stop doing this) hurt or killed

O = Oddity (what is one of their quirks?)

he bites his nails. he also paints them, and its kinda hot, tbh

P = Pet Names (what do they like to call you?)

he adores calling you: darling, dove, love, my baby, my darling, my pretty darling(😩),my handsome baby(😩😩😩😩)

Q = Quality Time (how do they like to spend time with you?

cuddling, reading, talking, or going outside.

R = Rhythm (what song reminds you of them?)

Adele- I Miss You

Mitski- Me and My Husband

Patrick Watson- Je le laiserai des mots

Matt Maltese- As The World Cave In

S = Secrets (how open are they with you?)

depends on the situation, but he really does try to talk to you, and he does.

T = Time (how long did it take you to get together?)

a few years, but you had liked each other for more that 'a FeW yeARs'

U = Upset (how do they act when you’re upset?)

he lets you get out your emotion out, and then asks you about what happens, but he understands not to interrogate you, and if you dont want to talk, he will let you come to him when and if you want to

V = Vaunt (Do they like to show you off?)

yes. yes, yes, yes, yes. he happily admires you and talks about you to whoever will listen, and the poor person is like, "are you married yet-"

W = Warrior (how do they feel about you fighting? Would they fight for you, beside you, etc?)

if you want to fight, he will let you fight... by his side. if he loses you, he loses himself, and if it comes down to it, he'll take the killing curse for you.

X = X-Ray (how well are they able to read you?)

you know how to mask your true feelings, so it might take a minute for Regulus to "read" you, but he will, in the end.

Y = Yes (how would they propose to you?)

on one of your picnics, he just asks. "y/n? my love? my darling?" "yes, darling?" "will you- will you look at me?" you look up from a book or whatever the hell ur lookin at "marry me?" you bring him in for a very yummy kiss and look at his beautiful ass eyes. "of course i'll marry you, Regulus Arcturus Black, the love of my life." you whisper into his lips and kiss him again and ugh 😩

Z = Zen (what makes them feel calm?)

lavender and vanilla candles, rain. and books. regULUS LOVES BOOKS TO ME OKAY?!

[tendouluvr]

aizawa calling you clingy - gn reader

- [attempt at] angst to fluff

- warnings: being called clingy, aizawa gets annoyed with reader and berates them, one use of the word ‘shit’

- wc: 1.9k

a/n: this wasnt......as sad as i wanted... i cant tell if im just not so good at writing angst or immune to it T_T

once again, not edited!

#! aizawa!!!! eee

#! hes a levelheaded man so arguments are rare

#! u both trust one another so theres no reason to have doubts in ur relationship

#! being his s/o, he tells u things thats not so easy to tell others over time, and you’re patient enough to let him take however much time he needs to let u in

#! however, years of keeping to himself most of the time doesnt just disappear even if you’re his s/o

#! so aizawa does have this tendency to close off and distance himself from u bc of his stress and insecurities

walking through the spacious halls of ua, you were headed towards your lovely boyfriend. aizawas been pretty busy lately with teaching his class, making sure no one is being left behind progress wise, doing his job as a pro-hero, and then spending his free time training with shinsou.

you knew showing up at school unexpectedly was something aizawa found irky, that’s why you made sure to tell him the night before that you would be coming during lunch time to bring him some yummy homemade food.

humming softly to yourself, you finally reached the door opening to class 1-A and walked in. the classroom was empty, but there at the front was no one other than mr. aizawa shouta. you quickly greeted him with a smile and he turned to look at you.

“what are you doing here?” he slowly asked with a look of confusion.

“i brought you some food! did you eat yet? i hope not, i made-,” you quickly stopped talking once you noticed the look he was giving you.

“why are you here? i already told you, you shouldnt be showing up without letting me know first. our relationship is quiet, if the students see they’ll get noisy and ask questions, i’ll get bombarded by my colleagues, and it’ll put you in danger if words get out. did anyone see you coming here? can you listen to me for once instead of continuing to always be near me? you’re so damn clingy and need to start thinking about the consequences your action will bring. i already ate, just go home before anything happens.”

your jaw dropped a little after hearing what he just said to you. did he not remember what you told him last night?

worst of all, you couldnt believe he just called you clingy. you just wanted to do something nice for him by making his favorite food hoping that it’ll relieve some of the stress thats been building up, but he just thought of you as clingy.

fine, if clingy is what you are then you’ll stop bothering him. you quickly whispered an apology, not sure if he could hear or not, and began making your way back home as fast as possible. the food you made for him was still tightly grasped in your hand.

due to the new dormitories, aizawa stays at ua majority of the time. he comes home to your shared apartment whenever he can to spend time with you. unfortunately, those time aren’t usually much because as soon as he’s free, he’s quick to do something else.

once you’ve made it home, you packed the food away and put it in the fridge. you felt your phone buzzing repeatedly, already guessing who it could possibly be, you took it out to see it was your boyfriend.

shou <3: im sorry

shou <3: honey, im so sorry. pls text me back when u can

shou <3: i know what i said hurted u, but i promise u i dont mean it. pls just call me or text me so we can talk about this

shou <3: i have to go back now. but i love u. so much.

staring at your screen, you contemplated texting him back.

letting out a sigh, you decided not to.

putting your phone to the side, you walked to the bedroom and changed out of your clothes into the comfy pjs you were wearing right before you left.

seeing that there was nothing for you to do other than wallow in your insecurities and let out a few tears, you got into bed and made yourself comfortable for an afternoon nap.

aizawa on the other hand was at school and distracted. his own words kept replaying over and over in his head and all he wants to do is smack himself a few times (after comforting u ofc).

his students could tell he was in a badder mood than usual so they collectively agreed to not worsen it (one particular student does not care. can u guess?). aizawa just wanted the day to pass so he can apologize to you directly and make it up with some cuddling.

despite being distracted with planning his apology and thinking about you, he was still teaching as he should and constantly telling his students to be quiet because he’s intimidating like that.

a few hours passed, the students are back in their dorms and some of the teachers are still in school finishing up some work. the hallways were empty and silent, and the weather outside was nice and calm - not too sunny with just the right amount of wind.

however, if you were to peek your head inside of class 1-A at the moment, the environment is an exact 180. aizawa is quickly trying to grade the remaining stack of papers he has on his desk so he can leave as soon as he can. there’s papers everywhere, he’s not so sure where the answer key went off to but to hell with the answer key. he just needs to go home.

his hair is messily tied up and his lips have probably been gnawed off by now. as soon as school ended, he got out his phone to see if you replied and sadly you didn’t. he doesn’t blame you though, considering all of the shit he said to you earlier. 

finally writing down the fat score in red pen onto the final paper, he gathers everything and put to the side of his desk and packed up his stuff. his stuff being his yellow sleeping bag and that’s it.

he went to his room first to clean himself up a bit, and then grabbed a taxi to go to your shared apartment. arriving at the front door, he takes out his copy of the key and entered.

first thing he noticed while entering and taking off his shoes was that the apartment was dark and quiet. he made his way to the kitchen first and turned on its lights to check the fridge. in the fridge laid the food you made for him earlier today. he took it out to start heating it up in the microwave then he walks away from the food and to your bedroom.

quietly opening the door, he poked his head in to see you laying on your side with your back facing the door. he assumed you were asleep and gently closed the door to not wake you up. he made his way over to the bed and sat on the edge of it. 

you, feeling the bed dip, slowly opened your eyes to be greeted with the sight of your boyfriend gingerly brushing his fingertips across your cheekbones. he notices that you’re awake and looks up to meet your eyes.

making eye contact with him, you quietly grunted and brought the blanket up to cover your face while turning your entire body to the other side to ignore him. aizawa sighed and brought his hand down to rest on your waist as he begins talking.

“yn... i know you’re.. mad at me for the things i said to you earlier, but i’m truly sorry. i know saying i didn’t mean it isn’t good enough for you to forgive me, but i want you to know i’m really really sorry. i’ve been so busy for the past few days, my head is all over the place, seeing you at school just got me overthinking and worried that i ended up saying things about you that’s not true at all. i love you so much, hun. you’re the best thing to happen to me. you don’t have to forgive me now, i understand if you want some space.”

it was silent for some time after he finished his apology. the echoing silence was slowly making aizawa worried that you’ll leave him, but he won’t tell you that. thinking that you wanted space, he lifted his shaky hand off of your waist and moved to get off of the bed when you suddenly grabbed onto his hand to keep him there.

“i...i told you the day before that i was going to be visiting you during lunch time. did you not remember? or even hear me tell you?”

aizawa situated himself back down onto the bed before replying. “if i’m being honest, i don’t really remember much of that day at all. my brain was occupied with work and rest, so i was practically drained by the end of the night. i’m sorry i took it out on you, it’s my fault for overworking when i know you’ve been trying to help.”

letting out a soft sigh, you turned your body back towards him. still holding onto his hand, you carefully slotted your fingers in between his and pulled him down to lay with you. he immediately found comfort in this and placed his head into your neck. you could feel his facial hair against your skin making you let out a quiet giggle.

“i love you. i know you have a habit to overwork since that’s all you did before we dated, but please shou, take care of yourself. im not talking physically, cuz you’re already so damn fine, but mentally. i hate seeing you bury yourself in work and training that it even makes me tired just watching you.”

he grumbled something against your neck - his usual reaction to you complimenting him - and held onto you tighter while putting light kisses on your collarbone.

“i know. i will. please bear with me, i know i’m a pain but i’ll always try to be my best for you. i’m never letting you go, love you too much for that.”

“hmm? who said i’m going? you’re stuck with me forever just so you know,” you laughed and patted his head before rising from the bed.

“i heard you heating up the food earlier. get up and come eat,” you tugged aizawa to get him off the bed.

he grumbled once again because he was being forced to leave the warm comfort of your shared bed, but followed you out anyway holding onto your hand.

“wait. you heard me entering? so you were pretending to sleep when i got here?! not funny, babe. not funny. -also don’t take sleep for granted. i did and look where that got me. stop laughing!”

bonus:

it was the next day and aizawa just finished passing out the grades he rushed grading yesterday. even though it was rushed, he was confident that there wasn’t any mistakes-

“aizawa sensei, you marked this question wrong when it’s right. this one too. and this other one on the last page. are you trying to fail me?!” denki dramatically wailed as he showed aizawa his papers.

guess he did make mistakes after all.

[yesimwriting]

hiii, this might seem weird but do u have any head cannons for when the reader is pregnant and how the Darkling would react?

a/n love this concept,, it's not weird at all!! i feel like there's so much here!! also i leave for college this month and im lowkey starting to freak out so ive been watching star wars movies for comfort 😭and now i have half a mind to write for them, especially the prequels (cough, cough,, anakin) 😭 😭 that should tell you where i am mentally

anyways lets get into the headcanons:))

--

- okay so like most of my headcanons, this is probably going to be all over the place bc i feel like so many different things could change how he would react. Like if the darkling x reader have been trying to get pregnant, or an unplanned pregnancy with someone he really likes, i also think whether or not the reader is a grisha affects his reaction too

- in general though, i think he'd lowkey have a breeding kink he'd def find something about the thought of you having his child really attractive bc for one thing, he wouldn't have to worry about being left alone and now he has an excuse to be a real 'protector'.

- also if youve read my other headcanons i am 100000% convinced that he has this thing where if he really likes someone he needs them to need him (let's all remember the whole 'i will strip you of everything you know and love speech until I'm your only shelter' speech he gave to Alina)

- also i kinda want to write a fic or blurb series or something that's just the darkling being super toxic in super thoughtful ways LMAO if that makes sense, like he's being super sweet but it's to make sure the reader is dependent on him

- and he def wants to be the protector to give himself some sense of assurance bc he's so desperate to not be alone anymore and bc the reader is the only person he has/loves, he wants to feel in control and like he's the less attached one

- okay,, let's get back to the pregnancy thing, anyways, your pregnancy is most definitely activating all of those senses and this was meant to be a sub plot but it kind of became it's own thing lol

- so lets get to the actual pregnancy reaction

if you two have been trying to get pregnant:

- when you tell him, he kind of like, pauses bc it's not every day that he gets surprised so it takes him a moment to register that he's experiencing shock lol, so he tenses and goes islent

- and then after he realizes that he's surprised and that it's bc of a good thing, he manages to relax

- meanwhile you're kind of freaking out bc he got so quiet?? you start to wonder if he's regretting ever wanting a child with you? and you're like two seconds away from a downspiral and then he...

- he touches your cheek and looks at you in a way you've never seen him look at anyone,, not even you

- the look is so warm and strong and full of fierce admiration that you feel foolish for ever thinking he didn't want this. And then he says something about how you're carrying his child and how he didn't realize he could adore you more and then he kisses you and it's all :)) warm:)

- he doesn't want anyone to know that he's expecting a child as long as possible bc of how many enemies he has and how he has to worry about you enough when people just know that you're his 'lover' (a title you never really liked, but one he tells you is necessary to make sure no one realizes the extent of his attachment)

- if you really want to tell your mother or someone of that relation, he won't be mad about it, but he just needs to know

- Genya is the only exception bc the darkling basically instructs her to look out for you,, but when you tell her she's like oh?? you guys just found out?

- miss girl most definitely noticed like a day and a half ago after you cried bc she couldn't find you ice cream the other night 😭and she just assumed you knew but weren't ready to tell anyone

- okay so this what i think is his most problematic expecting father trait would be. So i just ranted about how important secrecy would be to him but he's also the most overprotective person in the entire world,, like he was bad before but once he knows your with child?? yeah, if a man asks you about the weather, he's done for

- he's next to you in a second, ordering either you or the man to do some asinine task

- if you get mad about this (rightfully so) or even just point out how nothing is wrong and you having a casual conversation with a man who isn't even looking at you sexually won't hurt you or the baby, he'll lose rationality

- it depends on how much you push, but it'd be super easy to make him super possessive bc like i said, being bonded by a child has made him so much more intense (and he was pretty intense before)

- and if you push too much he'll lowkey forget about how cautious he's trying to be with you and pin you against the nearest wall and say something along the lines of 'are you already forgetting you're mine? that i own you, body and soul--is my child growing in you not enough of a reminder? because i'll give you another one if you need it.' (AH--i want to write a whole fic based on this line)

- also if the reader is grisha, especially if she's a sun summoner/special grisha like him, he def talks about the power that they've created and how proud he already is and how he can't wait to train together and be the most powerful family in the world

- not everything is perfectly happy though, bc now he feels more pressure to complete his plan and establish the world he wants his child to be born into

- so sometimes when he's working extra hard or is extra aggressive for no reason, you have to work at calming him down and reminding him that the best thing he can do for his child is be there for them (and the child's mother,, lol)

- sometimes he'll respond by actually listening to you and trying to make up for his absence or his aggression by being extra soft until you finally forgive him

- you never last that long, it's hard to be mad at him when he's coddling you and whispering such sweet things about he's so happy to have you and your future child

- overall, his first reaction is to swell with emotion, which he isn't used to, and so he becomes super protective but also extra lovey and you know that his overreactions are just him trying to show that he cares about you and your future child more than anything

If the pregnancy was unplanned:

- the initial reaction is pretty similar, only his state of shock lasts longer

- like i said at the beginning, he's not used to being surprised and an accidental pregnancy is so much more surprising than a planned pregnancy

- this really sucks for you bc he's not exactly known for his patience so you just kinda sit there and genuinely wonder if you're going to be a single mom or if you're going to want to deletus the fetus or something

- but then he takes a step towards you and you see how he's looking at you and you just know that that fierceness has to mean something good

- and at this point you're scared and nervous and feel so alone so tears are pricking at your eyes,, so he wipes his thumb across your cheek to wipe away tears you won't let spill

- he then whispers something really sweet about how you two are now together forever, as you should be

- it's really relieving bc you felt so alone and uncertain and he's such a smooth speaker that by the end of the night, you feel like this is a good thing

- if youre still hesitant/weighing your options, he's not above trying to (gently) manipulate you into thinking that what he wants may be the only way

- by that,, i don't mean outright tricking you bc he means everything he says, but he def is pushing the keeping the baby agenda,, especially if you're a grisha,, and even more so if you're a grisha with similar power levels to him

- he won't get angry at first bc he's not so out of touch that he's unaware of how shocking a pregnancy is to a woman who wasn't planning one,, but his patience is limited and if you fight it too much he will get mad and yell

- but unless you really don't want to have a child, it won't get to that bc he makes the idea of having a baby with him sound so perfect?? like you genuinely don't understand how he did that

- he chases away all of your worries and assures you that youre not alone and that even though it isn't planned he wouldn't rather anyone else carry his child

- the initial conversation would probably end in you two sleeping together again bc he finds the fact that you're carrying his child so attractive and bc being aware of the pregnancy makes him more possessive

- it's also a good way to fight any of your doubts

- speaking of being possessive though,, i feel like he could be a little more possessive/protective of a reader who didn't plan on getting pregnant bc your relationship has been less established

- no one sees you as anything to him and he doesn't want to start rumors now bc it's important to him that his enemies don't find out about you or his future child so he doesn't want that to change

- but he almost forgets about all of those reasons each time he sees a man get a little too close,, especially if that guy is flirty

- it takes all of his will power to not just go 'she's mine and if i wasn't worried about the stress that witnessing something violent would cause our unborn child, you'd be dead already, but if you're not gone by the time i turn around, i'll forget about caution'

- lots of close calls ngl!! at one point youre like 'if it bothers you so much, maybe you should tell someone??' and he's like 'no,, maybe,, shut up' and then you raise one eyebrow and he just closes his mouth and is like 'i mean,, i'll kiss you to shut you up, haha--dont be mad'

- youre the one that's pregnant but sometimes you think he might be the one experiencing the mood swings i swear 😭

- so your little theory gets tested,, he's not the type to gossip with his besties and be like 'guess who's officially my girlfriend, i knocked her up but it's not like it sounds--'

- so he's like ig you can tell genya

- once again genya is like ?? yall thought you were keeping that secret? couldn't be me

- but having it a little out in the open helps ease him just enough that youre actually capable of consoling him when he becomes jealous

- still though,, he's quick to go into possessive/pregnancy kink sex

- youre most def not mad about it,, unless pregnancy has you particularly sore

- he's normally pretty understanding about that and def doesn't mind pulling his weight in the bedroom when he needs

- honestly he'd be really good at being a source of calmness at the beginning, but as time goes on he becomes more and more worried about finishing his plans bc he didn't expect to have a child right now

- so he'd be more adamant about working/becoming more tense and would be more difficult to console if it was an accidental pregnancy

- when you call him out on it--or on anything while your pregnant--it's frustrating for you both bc the number one thing everyone knows is stress is bad for baby, so he's trying to keep you calm without backing down

- these argument always end with one of you clinging to the other,, and then the more angrier of the two just like shuts up, rolls their eyes, and lets go of the argument...at least for now

- the main difference between an accidental and intentional pregnancy would probably be how you perceive him,, bc an intentional pregnancy means youve talked about things but since you havent talked about anything your shocked about how soft he becomes ??