#damn you sanderson

[yooo-lets-go]

May I request more Roach and Gaz?

They are besties on Snapchat

[andromeda-lv]

Brandon Sanderson: here's a random 3 page chapter about a homeless guy eating fries

.

.

.

Also he's a god who destroyed two planets and plots to take over the world but I will never mention anything about it until another seemingly unrelated book series.

[woodsyrain56]

Just finished the Mistborn series by Brandon Sanderson (for now) and…DAMN IT, IT HURTS MAN. He probably has one of my favorite writing styles and it almost made me cry SEVERAL times, cause I listened to it while at work and…I’m gonna start the stormlight archive saga and, yeah.

I believe this is one of my first actual posts on here so, hi

[natelia-aldelliz]

"So what's his damage," Soap whispers to him as he's floating above Ghost's sleeping form, in the plane on their way to Mexico.

Roach snorts. "Would be faster to tell you what's not broken, honestly. Though I guess his fiancé dying on him was probably the final straw, what convinced him to just... Close off, I guess."

Soap's face contorts in earnest empathy. "Ah shit, sorry," he says. "Did ye know them well?"

Roach just stares at him. From the little he's seen of him in the field, he's extremely competent, smart and resourceful. He's also apparently quite dumb. He's lucky that's exactly the kind of person Roach likes.

He sees the exact moment the realisation hits him, his pretty blue eyes going wide. "Oh, you're the- okay, damn, sorry man."

Roach chuckles. "You should have said 'that's rough, buddy'. It's been five years, I've accepted my fate. I'd just... Like for him to do the same."

Soap hums. "It's a complicated issue," he whispers. "But I have to say, most ghosts that haunt their partners like it better when they haven't moved on."

"Why would I want that," Roach frowns. "I want him to be happy. I want him to have friends. I want him to live his life."

Soap smiles.

"I'll have ye know I'm trying really hard to be his friend," he says.

"Don't take it personally when he treats you like an arsehole, it's on purpose, to make you flee and allow him to keep wallowing in his misery."

Soap nods. "Thanks for the tip."

"... You really mean it? You really wanna be his friend?"

Roach finds out right now and then that Soap's smile holds the power of the fucking sun.

"Yeah! He seems really cool and I love making friends."

That's a golden retriever in human form, Roach is sure of it now. A really pretty human form as well. Anyway-

"He's also really hot under his mask." Why did he say that?? Roach tries really hard not to facepalm. The man just met them, it doesn't matter if he knows he's Simon's type (and his), he just wants to be friends, what is he doing... He doesn't even know if he likes men! He can only blame that on the five years he spent without social interaction.

Not that he was that good at social interaction when he was alive, but that's not the point.

Soap sputters for a few seconds, cheeks pinker. That's... Interesting. Damn, he really has a one track mind sometimes...

"Hum, guid tae knaw," Soap says finally, his accent thicker. Is he that flustered? Does that mean Simon has his chances?

If someone had told him years ago that he would be flirting with a co-worker, as a ghost, on behalf of his unaware still living fiancé, he'd have laughed probably.

[fixfoxnox]

Someone: Here is my fic idea! So Soap and Ghost are together and Roach is ghosts dead fia-

Me, immeditely:

[toomanywordsnllines]

Okay so today it’s seems like a ‘Roach thoughts have just taken over my brain’ day. So I was thinking about his relationship with Ghost... and then I thought about how he would feel after Ghost started dating Soap and hmmm I might’ve written 1k words of it lmao. So here have them! Hope you enjoy them

Jealous.

He’s not– No it’s not that he isn’t. It’s that he doesn’t want to feel like this. Jealousy was always something bitter to taste. His mother would scold him when little, saying that such ugly feelings were not to be felt, especially not towards a friend. Someone important to you. So it’s not that Roach isn’t jealous of his friend. He is. And the fact that he is, is what hurts the most. It anger’s him in a way, it feels disgusting and it burns, like bile. He worked so hard to get those two idiots together. Because Ghost deserved it. He deserved someone who understood him and treated him right, who took what he was and worked with that instead of waiting for change. Someone more than Roach– more than Gary. (Because he always gave him that, he always saw Simon for who he was and never took more than was enough. So, perhaps that’s why it hurts so much.)

But he knew, learned from a young age, that people are never truly completed until they find their second half. That friends are there as place holders and should not cling like desperate children when the other finds the right one.

It’s a bittersweet little thing when he realizes that he’ll never have that and his place will always be as second, third, another option, a passing thought.

He’s never been one for self loathing (that’s a lie) but…

It hurts, worse than a bullet or a knife to the gut. It’s heartbreak and it’s worse than any other broken relationship he’s ever had. Because– because it’s his best friend leaving him.

And he feels so alone.

“Hiding in the shadow’s tends to be my thing, ya know.”

“A little selfish of you.” He looks up at the man standing in front of him, as usual covering all light with his huge fucking size, he looks him in the eyes and he looks… happy, content. Roach feels himself smiling absently, looking away and staring at the ‘Lieutenant Riley’ embroidered on his jumper.

Ghost hums, keeping his stance between Roach’s legs watching them swing idly.

“What’s up,” he asks, voice soft and comforting.

The ball that forms on Roach’s throat tastes a lot like grief. He’s going to lose all of this and he doesn’t know what to feel. Slash his belly open and he might know how to close the wound. Tear his heart from his chest and… Slowly taking a deep breath, slow and controlled, steady so it looks normal and not like he’s trying to pull himself together, he lifts his hands and signs: ‘Tired.’ He sees Ghost cocking his head to the side, analyzing him. He always hated when he did that. Made him feel like a caged animal in the zoo, he mindlessly thinks about kicking him for it.

“That all?”

No– no that’s not all, that’s not even scratching the surface. Tired does not even begin to describe the sinking feeling of absolute dread that’s taking all his organs down. It does not describe how he’s stupidly grieving someone who’s alive and healthy and still pretty much there. It can’t explain how it feels like a hole has been placed in place of his heart. Cold. Empty. Alone, alone, alone- “I’ll leave you to it, then.”

    ‘I’ll leave you to it, then.’     ‘I’ll leave you to it, then.’                         ‘I’ll leave you to it–’                                         ‘I’ll leave you–’                                                   ‘I’ll leave you.’                                                    ‘I’ll leave you.’

It’s like something snaps. Dizziness overcomes him with how fast he looks up. And he feels himself watch– He watches– He’s watching as Ghost turns his back to him. He’s leaving– Maybe it’s the word ‘leave’. Perhaps the ‘I’ll’ with the ‘you’. But panic wells in his chest and he’s watching – rewatching –  through a head filled with water, Simon’s back again before they march to a mission that would lead to their almost death. It’s watching Simon slowly bleed out before he can do anything. It’s watching death try to take him away.  It’s watching Simon take his heart and leaving him to bleed without meaning too. He’s watching death taking him

Himself.

He makes some type of noise, or grunt or something because Ghost is pausing and turning around– but Roach has lost control of his body the moment Simon started going away. He falls from where he was sitting, stumbles and slams against Ghost’s back, twisting the fabric between his hands

The man pauses.

And Roach tries to take a deep breath, but everything is so much and too little. He feels so empty and so– sad. He feels so sad He bunches the jumper in his hands– he’s going to lose his best friend–

“Ro–”

“Don’t leave me.”

And Ghost – Simon – might be dense as a god damned brick wall when it comes to his own feelings. But he’s also a caring soul at heart and observant at mind. He understands that those three small, insignificant words might as well be Roach putting his gun on Ghost’s hand and asking him to end it already. He understands. So it’s with little to no words that he turns around again and holds Roach closer, tighter. Holds him together as he falls apart. Agony is what the tears that drip down his chin feel like. Relief in his hiccups. Desperation in his hold.

He’s going to lose this. He’s a mess. He feels twenty again going through his first mission and having a strong hand on his back comforting him. He feels some years after that, all the years after that, and all his fallings and stumbles. How there was always a hand there, heavy and clumsy in its comfort. But always there. Not making him talk when he couldn’t, learning and finding a way to understand him when no one would. There. Always there. He’s going– “I’m here,” a pause, a nudge at his temple, “‘m not going anywhere.” The arms around him tighten even more it’s suffocating – he needs it tighter – it’s warm, it’s safe and it’s sleepless night’s talking about anything and it’s sneaking into medbay when you shouldn’t and it’s warm tea and– “If not even death can take me, you really think a hot headed Scot would?”

–It 's Simon.

It’s a little all over the place but that was a mixture of doing it on purpose  (emotions are hard and jumbled, no use making them look neat) and me not being the best of writers XD

[themuseoftheviolets]

lauren sanderson song of the day

[fantasiavii]

I’m like 70% through Towers of Midnight and it feels like it’s ending which is making me nervous. I have like 11 hours left what is happening

[highlifeboat]

The thing about Sandersons relationship is that... they simply don't know any better.

Like, they basically raised each other in relative isolation. They relationship is dysfunctional, but it's the only one they know.

No wonder, it took Sarah so long to confront her sisters, she thought her treatment was normal sibling relationship :p

The thing is though... Winnie and Mary do know better. If Hocus Pocus 2 is anything to go by, they were both teenagers by the time they became witches, while Sarah was like... 8 or 10, maybe, so assuming their parents died after Sarah was born, they both would have been raised by them for at least a little while.

I just think there's something to the idea that... they grew up in a Village. A village that probably would've helped 3 kids that lost their parents, at least for a little while. Mary showing empathy is also prof that someone had to teach them empathy, whether that was villagers, their parents, or the Mother Witch (who I'm assuming had some hand in raising them as well)

I just think Winnie is a very angry person, and while she might care for her sisters, she vents her frustration through them. And I think it specifically falls onto Sarah because Sarah is the one who tends to annoy her the most.

Mary definitely feels more like she bullies Sarah in a "sibling" way, but that isn't necessarily any better in this case. I do think she cares, but she's also more a devil's advocate and just goes with whatever is happening.

Sarah's the only one I think legitimately has no clue what a healthy familial relationship is. They just know that they love their sisters, and they love them, and sometimes that love is very painful. But it's still love. Or at least they think so.

But I do think they start to get tired of it, and just internalize those feelings. Because they know standing up to Winnie is pointless. The fact Sarah even attempts to demand more respect after getting powers shows that on some level they are sick of just being seen as stupid or a punching bad. So there is some degree of self awareness. (And quite frankly the way she flinches and immediately backs down when Winnie gets mad at her is so sad)

But I think the concept of Sarah seeing a healthy(er) sibling dynamic would be really neat. Like them learning the difference between minor sibling bullying and just.. flat out physical abuse. Or even just seeing them be happy together without a fight and having that split second "Oh I want that." moment.

[slothinginorbit]

The whole article is a hate piece on not only sanderson but also SFF fan culture. Jason kehe tries to paint the people in a bad light as much as possible: smelly, man-child, cultish, omg they have sword replicas and the swords have names??? Oh and why is there no sex in sandersons books, apparently that is a big sin. I would like to ask why are you so obsessed with having sex in every book sir? Why is it a must?

Why did they write this bs article? Many people are butt hurt in the industry for sandersons kickstarter being immensely successful and making him a lot of money. And that's the connection to this, me thinks. Publishing couldn't pocket all that money like they usually do.

[sedgewicke]

The Alethi: Jam is for girls.

The Fjordell:

*gets up*

*sits back down*

[forusomimiya]

Well, I was actually going to write something tonight, but I just finished a book and am drowning in my own tears.

I literally feel nothing right now. Just sadness.

[homicidal-slvt]

Thoughts on COD men favorite way to cuddle? Personally I believe Soap likes to lay directly on top of his partner, he’s a whore for head scratches. Please any soft headcanons you have for 141+LV would do rn. I just need some soft boys. 🥹

How Do They Cuddle?

-

COD SFW Head-Canons

Characters: John Price, Johnny Mactavish, Simon Riley, Kyle Garrick, Alex Keller, Gary Sanderson, Nikolai, Alejandro Vargas, Rodolfo Parra, Kate Laswell, Valeria Garza, Phillip Graves, König, Farah Karim

-

Warnings: None- Just Fluff.

-

John Price

Loves to pull you into his arms in bed and be the big spoon, honestly okay with most cuddle positions.

Will lay on top of you and snuggle but it's typically unintentionally in his sleep- like a weighted blanket that snores and sleep talks.

Will pass out immediately if you rub his shoulders.

Johnny Mactavish

Absolutely adores laying on top of you with his head on your chest, your heartbeat soothes him and lord help him if you scratch his head- he may just drool.

Any and all types of spooning is welcome, will be the little or big spoon.

Hands on you every chance he is given, tugging you close in bed and nearly roasting you because this man is a straight up living furnace.

Simon Riley

Pulls you into his side so you can lay your head on his chest, typically sleeps laying on his back.

Absolutely melts if you press little kisses to the scars on his face, wraps his arms around you so tight that there is no escape.

Not opposed to you spooning him or just wrapping your arms around him from behind.

Kyle Garrick

Does the thing of tucking your head to his chest so you can listen to his heartbeat, will also hum a soft tune to you and murmur the sweetest things as you fall asleep.

Tuck your face into the crook of his neck and you'll hear an audible sigh of happiness, arms slipping around you to pull you impossibly close.

Kiss attack!!! Will randomly pepper kisses all over your face and anywhere else you'll let him- he just can't resist you.

Alex Keller

Absolute puppy energy as he follows you around closer than usual whenever he wants to cuddle, will eagerly pull you to him on the couch or wherever else you two sit down.

Tucks his face into the crook of your neck and purposely tickles you with his facial hair, grins like an idiot when you giggle and push at him.

Is typically the big spoon in bed because he just loves being the one with his arms around you, planting kisses to your shoulders.

Gary Sanderson

Lays on top of you to trap you with his affection, nuzzling and making little hum sounds to express how much he adores you.

Traces shapes and letters along your skin when you two are cuddling in bed, loves tugging you close to his chest and running his hands along your back.

Often pats his lap when he wants you to stop what you're doing and just come sit on him for snuggles for awhile.

Nikolai

Handsy? Handsy. Gentle touches at all times and constant hugs from behind, is so damn cozy though and knows it- pulling you into him every opportunity.

Loves having you lay on top of him like a blanket, mumbling loving words in Russian as he rubs your back.

If you're sitting beside him his arm is wrapped around you, however he much prefers you on his lap so he can hold you even closer.

Alejandro Vargas

Wants you to lay on him. Please lay on him or let him spoon you, he just has to feel you close so he can praise you softly.

Will drag you onto his lap to hold you when he feels you're working too hard, that's enough chores for right now- snuggle time.

Rubs his hands lightly up and down your sides when you two are in bed.

Rodolfo Parra

Literally the absolute sweetest- wants to sit and cuddle you while feeding each other snacks. Wants you on his lap so he can tell you about his day while sticking food in your mouth.

Loves being the little spoon or laying his head on your chest, run your fingertips along his back and he'll hum out in response.

Consistently gives you the coziest hugs and sweet forehead kisses, hands on your waist or lower back.

Kate Laswell

Intense spooning- prefers being the big spoon but will gladly be the little spoon. Loves taking care of you.

Wants you to lean your head on her shoulder when you two are sitting at home watching shows together.

Encourages you to tell her all about your day, pressing a sweet kiss to your head as you drift off in her arms.

Valeria Garza

Holds your hands when you two cuddle in bed because it's romantic, presses kisses to your knuckles as you tell her about your day.

Praises you for whatever you accomplish and also insists that you take plenty of breaks so she can hold you.

Wants to be the big spoon or tuck your head against her chest so she can mumble sweetly in your ear.

Phillip Graves

An absolute menace who unleashes tickle attacks occasionally when you two are cuddling, usually though he just mumbles sweet things against your skin.

Showers you with kisses and groans softly as he eases into bed with you and with a 'c'mere darlin'' starts spooning you- loves being big spoon.

Wants you to lay your head on his chest sometimes as well, feel his breathing and steady heart beat while he rambles about his day.

König

Lay on him please- he craves it so bad to just feel you close like that. Wants to hold you tightly to himself and ramble about how much he loves you.

A giant teddy bear- please let him lay his head on your lap. He'll fall asleep instantly.

Gentle and doting wanting to give you massages constantly- if you return a massage though you will just hear so many soft groans and praises in German.

Farah Karim

Spoon spoon spoon- will be little or big spoon she doesn't care. Just let her tell you how gorgeous/handsome and perfect you are.

Rests her hands on your waist often when you're doing things, especially loves doing it if it makes you flustered.

Lay your head in her lap and she will gladly smile and stroke your hair- you're just so cute.

-

{This prompt made me so excited I just had to do everyone. LMAO}

-

{@gothgirl6-6-6 @soupbinsoup @sofasoap }

-

{More Content}

[runicarbiter02]

How would each CoD character react to you touching their cheek for the first time? (In a caressing way)

A/N: Oh my god, this is actually the cutest and I couldn't think of a better way to start off this blog, thank you for this, love! I hope you enjoy! ~ Hannah

ALEX KELLER

Oh, this man is absolutely melting the second your hand cups the side of his face.

The goofiest damn grin on his face, corners of his eyes crinkling, soft laugh rumbling in his chest.

"How ya doing, sweetheart? Hanging in there?" Man is always concerned with you and your well-being.

Absolutely is the type of person to just completely nuzzle into your touch, soft sigh of content leaving his lips.

You aren't getting your hand back any time soon. Try and pull away, and he will absolutely pull the kicked puppy look. You can't bring yourself to pull away anyway.

ALEJANDRO VARGAS

"Oh, is there something you need, mi vida?" This motherfucker and his sweet, smooth voice. Love him.

He will gently draw you in close with a hand on your waist, that signature cheeky grin on his lips. He'll gently take your hand in his and just press sweet kisses to your fingertips.

This will lead to him pulling you aside for a moment, peppering you in sweet kisses and showering you in the most endearing compliments in Spanish.

Expect to be walking away with a spring in your step and a flushed face.

GARY "ROACH" SANDERSON

At first, he will look wildly confused, his brows furrowing slightly and his head cocking to the side.

"What's up, hun? Everything okay?" He signs the term of endearment with so much passion every time, it is absolutely the sweetest and most heartwarming thing. Any term of endearment he uses is always signed with more passion than anything else.

Once you let him know you just wanted to love on him, this cheeky little shit is flirting with you like crazy.

"Oh, just wanted to love on me, huh? Well, there's more ways you could-" He cuts his signing off with his own laughter when you playfully shove his face away, and he follows after you, making obnoxious kissy noises.

He makes it up to you, though, with the most affectionate kisses. He's goofy and that reflects in how he shows you his love.

(Can you tell I love Roach? I love him very much.)

JOHNNY "SOAP" MACTAVISH

Johnny will take your other hand, place it on his other cheek, and will gently press your hands against his cheeks to squish his face.

He hums happily, reveling in your touch as his eyes shut and his lips curl into a smile.

"Always know what I need before I even do, mo chridhe." This man is so, so whipped for you. Looks at you with so much love and affection that you might as well melt before him.

Do expect this to end up with you wrapped up in his arms, snuggled close, the Scotsman whispering some of the stupidest jokes known to man to you in an effort to get you to laugh.

JOHN PRICE

I have like a very specific image in mind for this one!

He tends to work himself to the bone, getting lost and caught up in his work, and its very, very hard to get him out of it. It's one of those nights where you find him hunched over his desk, nose buried in his work.

You walk up behind him, gently resting your hand on his cheek and he pauses, tilting his head back to look up at you.

Despite the exhaustion, his expression softens, the tender smile on his face highlighting the crow's feet at the corners of his eyes.

"It's late, isn't it...? Mmm... Alright, dearest, I'll head to bed."

He gently grasps your wrist and tilts his head to press a fleeting kiss to your palm, and then to the pulse point on your wrist. It takes a bit more convincing before he's off to bed.

(I'm a bit biased, I'm a major John Price simp if you couldn't tell.)

KEEGAN RUSS

Look, I firmly believe our resident masked men are softies, but they're all different in terms of their softness.

This man is a softie with you, but good god, is he suave and flirty.

"Mmm, what's up, kid...? Just looking for an excuse to see my face, hm? All you had to do was ask." It should be illegal how much this man's voice sounds like a silky purr.

Soft kisses to your fingers, knuckles, and the back of your palm. Fleeting kisses that barely meet, brushing against your skin and leaving trails of goosebumps in their wake.

"Always so sweet for me, kid."

KÖNIG

(Apparently this man is a colonel? And from what I've seen, if he joined at 18, and if we take the average amount of time it takes to get to that rank... This man is likely in his early 40s. Dilf König? Dilf König.)

Masked man number two! Softie, but different from Keegan. This man is the shy sort of soft.

I imagine this would happen after he shows you his face for the first time. He grew up bullied for his appearance, among other things, and its made him rather insecure about his looks.

When you gently cup the side of his face after studying him for a moment, he heaves a shuddering sigh and averts his gaze shyly. But, the second you tell him how handsome he is, his face goes pink and he flushes shyly.

"Ah, meine Sonne und Sterne... You're going to make me melt." He then proceeds to kiss you softly on the forehead and tells you how much he loves you.

KYLE "GAZ" GARRICK

A pleasant flush works its way onto his cheeks and he gives you that beautiful smile full of sunshine.

"Missed you, lovely. You been taking good care of yourself?" Sweet, heartless man that he is, worrying about you even though he looks exhausted after his most recent mission.

Gently draws you into him and just hugs you tight, pressing his face into the crook of your neck and sighing happily. The second your cologne or perfume washes over him, all tension leaves him completely.

"Missed this. Missed you." Whispered words against your skin. He gently sways in place with you as you two embrace, his hand coming to rest on the back of your head. Fully cherishes the moment.

"How's about some takeout and we finally watch that show you've been talking about? The House of the Dragon, right? Hopefully its better than the last few seasons of Game of Thrones." You have a stellar date in as you binge the entirety of The House of the Dragon and make up for lost cuddling time.

(Gaz does NOT get enough love and it's criminal. Perfect boyfriend/husband material right here. I adore him. Also? Man is absolutely gorgeous? Best man.)

NIKOLAI

(Russian dilf? Yes please! Underrated man right here.)

Late nights in bed, curled up with him are always the sweetest. Soft whispered nothings as you both lay together, skin on skin, fully content in a post sex haze.

He shoots you a lazy grin as you cup his face, his hand gently rubbing up and down the expanse of your back. "What's on your mind, мое солнышко? Laying there looking so stunning..."

Soft, playful kisses are placed along your jaw, a cheeky smirk on his lips when you begin to protest, laughter in your voice.

"One more round wouldn't hurt... We can sleep in tomorrow morning, Золотце." You know damn well you're going to be exhausted in the morning as he takes the time to worship every inch of your skin.

RODOLFO "RUDY" PARRA

(Rudy, my darling, my beloved, my SWEET! This man is also criminally underrated even though he's PERFECT husband material. SHAME!)

He happily returns the favor as you rest your hand against his cheek, his hand cupping your cheek as he rests his forehead against yours.

"Long day, cariño? Mmm, I understand... I'll draw us a bath and we can relax." He takes your hand, pressing sweet kisses to your knuckles before he draws a bath for the both of you.

You both spend most of the evening in the tub, you resting against his back as he holds you close, featherlight kisses pressed to your skin as you both talk about your day.

The both of you take such good care of each other, and there's never less than 100% put into your relationship on both sides.

SIMON "GHOST" RILEY

Masked softie number 3: Tender and longing edition.

His night terrors don't often wake you; he's usually fairly good at hiding them. The first time he does wake you is during a particularly violent one that has him thrashing and crying out in his sleep.

He wakes not long after you do, sweating and panting, his voice hoarse from how much he had been crying out. Once you're sure he's fully conscious, you gently rest your hand against his cheek and guide him through a grounding routine: 5 things he sees, 4 people he knows, 3 foods he likes, 2 things he hates, and one thing he loves.

As he talks, you become his sole focus as the night terror fades into the back of his mind, the grounding method working wonders.

And when it comes to the one thing he loves, he shuts his eyes and presses further into your touch, a few tears streaking down his cheeks. One hand gently clutches your wrist while the other rests against yours, holding your hand against his cheek. He doesn't need to say it. You know.

You always, always know. And with a kiss to his forehead and your thumb stroking against his cheek, you let him know. I love you too.

[I'M SORRY IF ANY OF THE TRANSLATIONS ARE INCORRECT, I TRIED MY BEST TO GET THE PROPER ONES!]

Mi vida - My life; honey

Mo chridhe - My heart

Meine Sonne und Sterne - My sun and stars

мое солнышко - My sunshine

Золотце - Honey; darling

Cariño - Honey; dear

TAGLIST:

@floral-force

[aethelwyneleigh27]

Some Dad!Cod Character Scenario and Appreciation Post

Characters In Mind: Simon "Ghost" Riley, John "Soap" MacTavish, Kyle "Gaz" Garrick, Alejandro Vargas, Rodolfo "Rudy" Parra, Alex Keller, König, Keegan P. Russ, Gary "Roach" Sanderson.

The original creator of the picture, they also have so many works that are used in so many fanfics as well so please credit her. I found her account here on Tumblr (@ave661) and here is the post.

AFAB!Reader and used pronouns are "you"

Apologies if this is a bit too short but;

ꕥ HOPE YOU ENJOY! ꕥ

A/n: I've had a good but also bad week (good thanks to @puff0o0 and other extremely sweet mutuals), it's neutral, I'm not here to rant of any sort but my personal life has not been good. I understand that not everyone will like me but it feels as though everyone hates me, most of those people happen to be at school. Sure I'm not really going to do anything about it because I prefer avoiding conflict but those same people are trying to flip the story around as if I'm the one who hates them when in reality I don't and by being mean to me they're giving me a reason to dislike them. Sure I'm average academically, sometimes I have difficulty pulling my weight in group works and I'm not outstanding in reportings but we all have our difficulties. I just don't understand people who love to hate on others because they have nothing better to do.

This is a word of advice to everyone, don't let others let you feel insignificant, you aren't and you have many talents that make you different from them. (I don't really practice what I preach because I love self-deprication, however I don't want people to feel the way I do because I know what it can cause)

Disclaimers/warnings: OOC??, Pregnancy, Implied birth, Children (Pretty sure that was obvious from the title), People who don't want/hate children be warned.

Short note: This is also a dedication to all the Mistki and Hozier fans out there <3

He was so used to the smell of hospitals, the smell of medication, it always indicated death for him but this was a whole new feeling. It was the opposite of what he has seen most of his life

So much so that he refused to hold them, afraid of potentially hurting the fragile little one. He looked at you as if you were crazy when you tried to hand him the baby, "Come on now love, you can't just avoid holding them forever" you said to him as of it was a life or death situation.

Hesitantly letting you guide him through the proper way to hold them, he felt his breath hitch at the sound of cooing. The first time the baby opened it's eyes, the first thing they saw being their dad.

The moment he looked at the baby sealed it, he was going to protect them their whole life, he would go as far as feeling all the guilt of having blood on their hands again if it meant your baby would be protected and cared for.

The baby was so small that it's little head was practically the size of his palm, he didn't know initially what to do when the baby cried and shocked himself when he managed to make them stop.

Once the baby was old enough to crawl, he'd let the baby crawl all over him. The little one babbling non-sense while he just chuckled and replied as if he understood what the baby was saying. Gods be damned if he misses an important milestone such as their first word or their first time walking.

You'd often wake up to seeing him shirtless snoozing on the couch, the tv playing only ads for home appliances late at night while the baby only in a diaper having skin to skin contact with their dad, his huge hand big enough to support the little one from falling.

He almost cried the first time your baby reached for his face an touched it, resting it's tiny little fingers on his cheek, giving him a gummy smile. His little one unaware that they just healed something they never broke.

He NEVER wants to ever see your little one grow up, though sure it makes more memories with them, sometimes they just wish time stops for a second so they can enjoy the moment longer.

Initially was terrified that he'd pass his trauma down but he realized that wouldn't be possible and he will NOT ever let them go through what he did.

Eventually chose to resign from his work because the risk was far too much, what if he died? He'd leave you and your child to grieve over him? He won't be there for them growing up and he'd miss everything.

Sure he's worked most his life to get where he is now but nothing is ever worth more than spending a lifetime with you and your child together. He's been lonely almost all his life until he met you.

You are his family, his everything. He promised that whatever happens, he'll crawl home to you...

[toomanywordsnllines]

Yesterday I posted banter. Today I post sad. Yepie!

I’m mixing a little of the stuff that happened in the ‘09 game here cus god i love to suffer. They didn’t die in that mission (and of course it wasn’t sheperd) and this is what happens after Ghost finally wakes up, *does a little bow*

Enjoy

The door slides with a bang.

Brown eyes look up at him startled, probably because of the bang, maybe because of the blood going down his arms from where he tore away the drip, perhaps because he looks like a corpse himself. His eyes are foggy with medication, tired. Alive. He 's alive. Alive. alive alivealive– 

Captain Price had gotten up with his brusque entrance, he doesn’t care about what he has to say, he doesn’t care, he doesn’t want to hear him and whatever stupid shit he has to say. Right now he doesn’t care about anything, because Simon is alive and awake. He’s so relieved, he’s so– so…

So… angry.

He’s alive but so is the fury eating Gary away from the inside out.

He stalks closer to the bed, legs cooperative, shakes contained for now–

[His heart’s racing] Simon watches with wide eyes as Gary comes closer to the bed, the relief that floods his insides at seeing him alive almost makes him dizzy. [His heart races]. If he wasn't already laying down he thinks he might’ve passed out there and then. But–

There’s also something churning in his stomach. Heavy. He can’t put a word to it. It makes him feel sick. The expression on Gary’s face makes him feel sick. There’s apprehension in his veins as he finally reaches the bed [His heart doesn’t stop].

He doesn’t know why.

“What were you thinking?” Roach spits out, venom dripping out of his tongue, heavy and acidic, with no restrain. Price’s eyes widen from the corner of his vision. Surprised that he was able to speak after the two week long silence. After a week of a catatonic silence. After not moving, not eating, thinking. He speaks steady, contained, heart hammering down on his bruised ribs.

Simon looks at him, brow furrowed in confusion.

He looks up at Gary.

‘What was he thinking?’ of the mission, of course.

He wonders if Roach might’ve suffered a concussion of shorts. He was there. He knew what he did and why he did it. They had a task to complete and he completed it. They signed for this. What if he almost died? He also almost died! But that’s what they're there for. To complete the task or die trying their damn best. He knows that. Roach know that.

He tells Roach as much

“I was thinking of the mission, and how it had to be completed.”

He sees Roach’s jaw tighten, there’s fury, actually fury burning in his expression. To the point where Ghost sees him shake with it.

He doesn’t understand…

“You almost died.” Gary says through gritted teeth and his voice cracks at the last word.

Why is his voice cracking

“It’s the job Roach! I had to take you to safety, you needed help! What does it matter if I die, anyway!? The mission–”

One moment he’s looking at Roach

The next his face is staring at the window to his right, cheek stinging painfully.

The sound reverberates between the four silent walls like a clap of thunder. It makes his ears hurt.

He hears Price do some aborted choked sound before–

“WHAT ABOUT ME!?”

Simon looks slowly back at him, he’s not ready to see tears, the same way he wasn’t ready for the outburst or the slap, for Gary screaming, for his voice to crack–

“DID YOU THINK ABOUT ME– HOW I WOULD– IF YOU?! DO YOU TH– THINK SIMON?! DO YOU THINK ABOUT ANYONE BUT YOURSELF?! HOW COULD– HOW WOULD I–”

There’s a weird type of ringing to his ears, not the type you get after a bomb goes out or how when the blood flows through the brain painfully quickly, not this feels like…

He thinks he might go insane because–

It feels like a breath of fresh air.

Realization.

As Gary dissolves himself into tears, hyperventilating his breaths and screaming his voice raw. Simon realizes something.

As Gary breakdowns in front of him he realizes he feels– feels

And he feels horrible.

He feels loved.

He cares. He loves– He loves him. Him– Simon Riley. 

Ghost almost left him because he couldn’t see that. No. He saw it and he ignored it because no one can love Simon Riley. He…He doesn’t exist anymore he’s not worth tears no one ever cried for him no one ever mourned him no one ever cared he’s not worth being cared for he has nothing to give back– He saw Gary and he ignored him, brushed him away, put him to the side, pushed him under the rug because– he thought–

He watches as Gary presses his hands against the side of his face, like a child. He did that.

His hands twist in the blankets because he feels lost.

He did this but he doesn’t know how to fix it.

Guilt burns his throat.

It burns fiercely until he reaches out, hand grasping a stained jumper.

He pulls him gently towards himself. Tugs him to come closer, please. Gary shakes his head. He tugs him again. He falls into his arms like he belongs there. He sprawls on top of him, legs hanging over the bed and sits on the mattress like he belongs there.

Simon wraps his arms around him, cradles his head to his shoulder, pulls him closer by the waist and hugs him. He hasn’t hugged someone in so long.

But he fits like he belongs there.

“Please, don’t cry.” His voice cracks and it’s awful. It’s awful the stinging in his eyes and the guilt on his stomach, “don’t cry.” Please.

His mind sticks to a loop of saying it over and over and over, over again until Gary hugs him back, until his arms sneak around him and squeeze. Hold him tighter and closer. Sobs louder, shaking worse. But…

He’s there, Simon realizes, he’s there and he could’ve almost lost him. Could’ve almost left alone. alone.

The tears roll down easily, they burn, they hurt.

He’s so sorry

“‘m sorry,” he says to Gary’s hair and then he repeats it again, again, again and again. And he’ll repeat them until he can’t anymore–

He almost lost him.

And since I’m not THAT mean have a little bonus of what comes after all...this mess xoxo

Roach is sitting on the mattress. Legs swinging back and forth as he watches the window. The hospital lights don’t really help with his appearance. Accentuating every bandage and crease showing just how exhausted he looks. He should go back to his room and rest.

Ghost watches him from where he’s propped up on his pillows. As he traces the curve of Roach’s jaw with his eyes his mind plays That day on repeat. They haven’t really talked about it. Roach hasn’t been able to talk after it anyway and his hands shake too much to sign anything correctly. Price says he had a nervous breakdown somewhere between that day and today. He traces a finger gently over Roach’s knuckles.

He watches his shoulders and how they slump with exhaustion but how his neck is filled with tension. He grabs the hand and squeezes.

Per hospital rules, masks aren’t allowed, no balaclava and especially not one with a skull mask sewn to it. He was allowed to wear at least a surgical one. Gary seemingly discarded it. 

When Roach looks at him he can see all his face, it’s set into a neutral one, tired and worn. His eyes are a little blank before he blinks. Ghost squeezes the hand again.

Gary hums and Simon looks at him. Looks at both of his eyes, down the slope of his nose and over the many bandages that litter his face.

He sits up more, ungluing himself from the pillows that are shaped after him, to sit by himself. Gary frowns a little at the movement. Simon doesn’t really regard his expression much, opting to stare down at the hand he still has clasped in his.

He uncurls the fingers with his other, swiping them gently and pressing his thumb on the center of the palm. He smiles as the arm relaxes.

His whole hand circles the wrist keeping it secure.

“Gary.”

He lifts his head as he says it, catching how Gary stares at their point of contact with heavy lidded eyes. He looks almost asleep.

Roach looks up.

And there’s a pause as Simon looks at his eyes again, his mind is made up but he was expecting his heart to race and speed up. It doesn’t. Instead beating comfortably in his chest.

He smiles.

“I love you.”

Roach blinks. Then his eyes widen and Simon feels a little fuzzy at the feeling of his pulse accelerating on the tips of his fingers. 

Roach– Gary knows what he means, that’s why his face falls almost immediately after the surprise. 

His hand tries to sign before he sees it’s shaking too much for that.

Gary takes a deep breath and Simon sees him mouthing his name, before his voices comes out shakly:

“I don’t– I can’t–”

“I know”

He smiles because Gary looks at him. Idiot.

“I don’t care.”

There’s a pause and Simon is ready for rejection. His smile doesn’t waver however, maybe it’s the drugs because he feels like he’s floating. The feeling of speaking out what he’s feeling and putting it out there, finally after so long... couldn’t really break with a ‘no’. He’s fine with rejection; he just wanted Gary to know.

Tears slip past Roach’s eyes, that makes him panic.

He cups the side of his face and swipes the tears with his thumb, using his bent index finger to swipe more of them when they come out in reverence. "What 's wrong?”

Gary shakes his head, and anxiety floods Simon, but then he huffs a soft laugh.

“Haven’t heard that in a while.”

His voice is sticky with emotion. That won’t do Simon thinks so he pulls his mask down and cups both sides of his face pressing a kiss to his forehead.

Roach slips down and presses closer to his chest, he presses his chin on top of his head and leans back.

He’s starting to comb his fingers through his hair when he feels a finger gliding through his collarbone.

‘Love you too.’ Puts my hands in my hips: MAN THAT’S A LOT OF WORDS [writes more]

they...make me feel...so much I could (and have) cry for them. They just mean so much to me eueueueeueu. This is me trying to explain -- as I put in my notes: “This about what made Ghost finally let Roach in. How it happened. And when he finally realized his feelings.” -- their relationship is kinda hard to put into words cus I see it as somthing more complex than friend and lover so here! They’re partners.