#dash safari

[great-and-small]

A large Nile crocodile is using your dashboard to bask. Please scroll past quietly.

[loustyles]

jsyk you can open any audio post in a browser and right click -> save audio :) alternatively (like on mobile) chrome tap 3 dot menu -> download, firefox tap and hold -> save file to device

[dreamertrilogys]

the awesome thing about this website being completely non-functional is that i can vote/see the options in polls but only if i click buttons in a random and incomprehensible order and even then only sometimes

[weirdgirlvampire]

I love playing the game ‘see how long I can scroll on tumblr before the app craps out on me’. Usually it’s around 5 minutes

[wickedghxst]

what’s with the sudden increase in ads.

[incorrectbatfam]

On the subject of Damian and the axolotl, I feel like people do send him pictures of animals and stuff and he gives a rating, idk tho

Stranger: I thought you'd like to know that Lacey had her puppies. *sends a pic*

Damian: For once, a mother who should be proud. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: *sends a derpy cat pic* This is my cat Momo, short for Movie-Theater Mozzarella-Sticks. He just turned 3 and likes to eat pillow feathers.

Damian: Truly the cat of all time. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: I think I saw Krypto the Superdog on my way to work. *sends blurry video of Krypto flying*

Damian: There goes Metropolis's hero. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: *sends a pic of a lizard in a pointy hat* This is King Gizzard, my lizard, as a wizard for Halloween.

Damian: I would give him all my candy. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: *sends a video of their parrot*

The parrot: Polly loves crackers and Damian.

Damian: Tell Polly I love her too. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: Bruh there are so many gophers at Gotham U. *sends pic of gophers chilling in the quad*

Damian: 10/10. Good for them, living their best life.

———————

Stranger: Do fish count? If so here's Bubbles. *sends video of a goldfish*

Damian: They absolutely do. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: I went to my aunt's farm and got to ride the horses. Meet Dash. *sends Instagram story with a horse*

Damian: A fine specimen. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: Opinions on this stingray? *sends scuba diving footage*

Damian: Superb. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: I found a worm. What should I name him? *sends pic*

Damian: He looks like a Kevin. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: This is me and my stepdad with the hens we've been raising. *sends pic*

Damian: What lovely ladies. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: I went to a butterfly garden today. *sends video of a butterfly landing on their hand*

Damian: Stunning. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: I just got back from a safari. *sends album of savannah herds*

Damian: Next time take me with you. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: *sends a Ratatouille GIF*

Damian: Don't tell my family but I'm training my rats to do the same. 10/10 by the way.

———————

Stranger: This is Herbie, our class bunny. *sends a pic with the teacher fumbling in the background*

Damian: He looks more intelligent than your teacher. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: *sends pic* Got bored and bought a frog. I'm naming him Toad.

Damian: I hope your life is as dull as ever. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: Tzu Tzu keeps leaving her laundry everywhere. *sends video of a snake shedding its skin*

Damian: You're her assistant. Do your job. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: I finally got a hamster!! *sends video*

Damian: Now treat them like royalty and get yourself some tubing. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: Ideas for decorating my hermit crab's shell? For context his name is Juan and he likes the color yellow. *sends pic*

Damian: I suggest black and gold. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: I saw a turtle on my morning walk. *sends a pic*

Damian: Ethereal. 10/10.

———————

Bruce: *sends a family photo*

Damian: *blocks and reports*

[missterious-figure]

OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! HOW WOULD THE BOYS REACT IF THEY SEE THEIR DEAR LITTLE HANDLER BEING HARASSED? Either physical or naughty flirty with inappropriate touches

The boys would most likely go ballistic, and attacked the offender on the spot.

Suggestive Warning: sexaul harassment, sexaul references.

You walked slowly through the safari zone, back on your way to the bar. You had just finished watching two adorable Indian roller chicks while they're parents were away performing. You were the only one free at the time, so you happily agreed. And better yet, Sun, Moon and Eclipse were busy at the bar performing for some event, so they weren't able to tease or bother you while you looked after the babies. But eventually they got someone else to take care of the hatchlings, so you were shooed away.

Other than that, today had been a good day. At least, for now... As the bar came into view, you knew the boys would be ending their performances soon. You sighed. Better get ready for the teasing. Your day already seemed worse. You opened the doors to hear the crowd finish up their cheering and the brothers disappeared behind the red curtain on the makeshift stage. Good. At least they wouldn't notice as you walked in.You managed to push your way through the many bodies to the counter without getting jostled too much. The bartender glanced up at you a smiled. You smiled back, before asking.

"Could I have a water please?"

Before they could respond, someone slammed you into the counter from behind. You were going to push them away, but who ever it was shoved one of their hands over your mouth and used the other to hold your hip. As you tried to get your lips free, you glared back at the offender. It was muscular dude with messy ginger hair and some peach fuzz to compensate for a beard. He wasn't dressed very fancy, which you found odd, given where he was. He wore a tattered white tang top covered in stains and long ripped jeans that pooled over brown sandles. You broke your face free from his grip and growled at him.

"Let me go!"

He quickly covered your mouth again and whispered in your ear, his breath heavily tainted by alcohol. He was kneading your hip with his other hand as he spoke.

"You're pretty cute, sweet cakes. I think you're going to be perfect."

He licked his lips as he admired you in areas you would rather him not. Small tears stung the corners of your eyes as he drew himself even closer.

"Perfectly small..."

Without warning, he was yanked off your body, and tossed through the air in the opposite direction. The man crashed in to a table, interrupting a couple's meal together. Meanwhile, you almost fell face first into the counter due to the shift in sudden weight. Before you could, gloved hands caught you. Gazing back, you were met by Sun's worried face. He turned you about and held you by your shoulders.

"Are you okay, Darling?"

You whimpered and nodded. Sun gently set you down on the ground and retracted his hands to himself. He looked like he wanted to hug you, but was holding himself back. You looked past Sun just in time to see Eclipse pick the man off the ruined table by the arm. He was probably the one who threw the guy. Eclipse brought him face to face.

"If I ever see you touch them again- no, if I ever see you NEAR them again, you will be severely punished. Now, get lost!"

Eclipse tossed him to the ground like he was nothing but a piece of trash. The man wasted no time. He scrambled onto his feet and dashed out of the bar. Eclipse watched until he was gone. He then turned to you and walked over. He crouched to your height. You backed away, scared, and not wanting to be touched. This was all happening too fast. But his eyes were soft and welcoming. You relaxed a little, reaching out. He gently embraced you. You snuggled quietly into his fluffy neck feathers, you hadn't even noticed you had started crying. Eclipse slowly stood. Your eyes were buried, but you could tell he was moving. You listened as Sun tried to follow Eclipse, by the sound of boots close behind.

Eclipse paused and growled at his little brother. You looked up at him, confused. You didn't expect him to get aggressive with his brother, and neither did Sun, as he looked quite shocked. That seemed more like a Moon thing to do. Speaking of Moon, you hadn't seen him this entire time. Hopefully he wasn't getting into any trouble...

Sun stared quietly at Eclipse, before turning around and marching back to the bar, angry. You almost felt bad for him. Eclipse continued his walking. As he did, you rested your head back into his neck. The rhythmic walking and bobbing made you sleep. That, and how much you were crying. You heard the click of a door opening. Everything else after that was hazy.

You could feel him placing him in his hammock... covering you with a blanket... sitting on the floor next to you, he started playing a song... no, he was singing... Your soft snoring filled the air. Eclipse still sung his song, watching your body contract with every breath. You were precious, and nobody was going to hurt you like that again...

[holopossums]

Tumblr staff at it again with some money-making scheme that preys on people who haven't been here very long and dupes people into thinking they'd be getting something good by using premium.

Reminder that all these features are FREE if you know how to navigate the site or have some wisdom and restraint.

Free solution to ad-free browsing: Use an adblocker. Ublock Origin is your new best friend. You can get it for desktop and mobile, pretty sure the only big browser not supported is Safari. On mobile you have to use Tumblr out-of-app on your regular internet browser for this to work, but it's nearly the same experience as being on the app. They don't want you to know this. They want you to think you have no choice but to use the app. But you do. You can improve your life. Get adblocker.

Free solution to early access features: You don't need that I promise. No one needs that. Every other new feature this site comes up with sucks anyway. You're not missing anything.

Free solution to blazed posts: Make friends and reblog from each other as god intended. There you go, your post gets circulated and all without annoying the hell out of random people because they chose to follow the ones putting the post on their dash.

Free solution to badges and such: Customize your blog. I cannot stress how much you should customize your blog. Just put an emoji in your blog title or bio if you don't have a badge. There you go, free badges.

Free solution to social feature limits: If you're posting more that 250 posts a day or liking more than 1,000 likes per day, take that as a sign from above to go do something else. Be honest with yourself, have you ever even hit that limit? And even if you did, do you really need double that limit? I hope not.

Don't give them your money, you can get all this stuff for free. Most people only pay for the no ads thing, but that's free too if you're willing to take a moment to download a browser extension and figure out how to use it. It'll save you so much money in the long run.

[steddieficfind]

Hi! I was literally just reading a fic on the little pop-up safari window you get when you click on a link on tumblr and then my phone died and I lost the fic and arghhhhhhh

Basically I saw a post on my dash earlier today that was someone reccing an author and it linked several of their works with a brief description and the ao3 summary, with a link to the fic on ao3. It was complete and it had 3 chapters but I don’t remember anything else from the ao3 info box.

The plot is that Robin wants to go to a gay bar so she can kiss a girl (or maybe Eddie suggests it?) and Eddie’s taking her (he’s out to Steve but that doesn’t happen in the fic) but she’s really nervous so she asks Steve to come along and he agrees. Eddie gives him this whole talk about how there are going to be gay people at the gay bar and Steve can’t freak out if they’re being gay or if guys try to flirt with him, which kind of insults Steve, kind of makes him feel really weird about the potential of getting gay flirted with, and kind of makes him super determined to show that he’s a Good Ally. Eddie helps Steve get ready and when they get to the bar Eddie pretends to be Steve’s boyfriend to stop guys from hitting on him. A drag queen tells Steve that Eddie’s in love with him and Steve freaks out about it and talks to Robin, who points out that maybe he should just be gay for Eddie. At first Steve is like No Way I’m Straight but then he thinks about it a bit more and decides to test it (his possible bisexuality) out by taking Eddie back to the bar to see if he (Steve) likes the fake boyfriend thing, which Robin thinks is an awful idea. In the meantime Eddie watches a basketball game with Steve and Steve goes to a hellfire meeting. They go to the bar and Steve is like Yup I’m For Sure Crushing On Eddie and I don’t remember what happens next because that’s about where I lost the fic.

Some details I remember are as follows: the drag queen is named Connie and she has a bet going with Steve about the basketball game and she promises to buy him a round of drinks in after the game airs in three weeks which is Steve’s excuse for bringing Eddie back, Steve bumps into one person on his way to the bar and the guy starts flirting with him/asking him to dance and that one guy is all it takes for Eddie to swoop in like Nope I’m Your Boyfriend Now, the author refers to the tops that Steve and Eddie wear as “singlets” (which was really confusing to me at first as I could only picture the wrestling leotards until I turned to google), Eddie puts makeup on Steve and it’s black and gold, Eddie give Steve a sword necklace and a spiky bracelet, neither of them return each others clothes because they liiiiiiiiiike each other, at one point eddie says that Robin has experienced being part of a “lesbian sandwich” (a term that Steve doesn’t know) and points out that she has red lipstick on her face

Sorry that’s a lot of details but I was reading the fic literally just a few hours ago before my frantic search to find it again

Thank you guys so much you’re truly doing god’s work o7

Request 904! Send us an ask if you recognize this fic!

[wip]

re the new messaging: I use desktop and multiple tabs at once and switch back and forth- the new messaging does not know how to handle this. When I switch tabs the conversation will be stalled way back wherever it last was in THAT tab until I close and reopen, and when I close and reopen (as I must do to get my updated messages or to switch convos and back), even in the same tab, when I reopen it will show an unsent draft of the last message I sent (or occasionally one from somewhere further back) rather than an empty field to type in, until I select and delete it so I can enter a new message; it's pretty annoying. Also it covers the scroll bar of the dash view pop up so you have to close the messages to access it, would be great if you could make the various changes work with rather than against each other

Answer: Hey, @b-a-n-d-e-r!

Thanks for getting in touch with this, and let us address your question in parts.

1.

"and when I close and reopen (as I must do to get my updated messages or to switch convos and back), even in the same tab, when I reopen it will show an unsent draft of the last message I sent (or occasionally one from somewhere further back) rather than an empty field to type in"

This is intentional! The message window will cache type, but not send messages when you minimize and reopen a conversation window. This won’t sync within browser tabs, and mobile apps have the same behavior.

2.

"Also it covers the scroll bar of the dash view pop up so you have to close the messages to access it"

If we understand this question correctly, from what we have seen on Chrome, Firefox, and Safari on Mac, the conversation window does not overlap with the browser’s vertical scrollbar. And it also does not overlap with the scroll-to-top button on the timeline. It is possible we have misunderstood your question and would invite you to clarify this one with us in case there is an issue.

3.

Finally, as for that shortcut and scroll-to-top button problem, we are already on this and planning to work on it as soon as we are able!

Thanks for your question, here. For any updates on the points raised, keep an eye here on WIP or over at @changes.

Best,

—Jasper and Maxime

[great-and-small]

Lucky you! An endangered secretary bird is crossing your dash!

[charlotteheehee]

Wario Land influencing Wario the Character (and vice versa)

Yeah I rambled to some friends of mine and I'm gonna copy-paste it here, with some tweaks and additions.

The Game Boy had a small screen, and since Wario's rather big frame would take up a good portion of it, it was decided his game would be slower pace as to prevent the players from not being able to react to what's ahead of them

Wario's greedy nature was established by selfishly stealing Mario's own castle in his debut game. This, combined with the above factor, influenced Wario Land's primary objective: looking around for LOOT.

With the incentive to explore levels that were slower and somewhat more open than Mario levels, it's a guarantee for more playtime and replayability.

(Would you look at this haul, wowzers!)

This is expanded upon in the sequels, which are even more exploration-based, fitting for Wario's newly-displayed hobby of treasure hunting.

And when the screen for Wario's games got bigger, whether it be on Virtual Boy or Game Boy Advance, Wario was allowed to ram into who-knows-what even faster.

Wario's design changed a tad following his new series, he was slightly redesigned to be less.. goofy-lookin for the protagonist role.

Here he is in 1992, his debut year, he's a real charmer.

The lazy eye, my dear lazy eye, was removed quite soon after.

Here he is in 1994 with his trusty treasure-hunting hat, his debut as the lead of the Wario Land series. He has a confident smile that says "You're-a playing as Wario now! That's right, soak it in, hee hee hah hah!"

(I know that's a safari hat, but the way it's shaded always makes it look like metal.)

Here's where his strength is first emphasized, what with powerfully ramming into everything and everyone against him. note those toned arms of his, this trait will become more visually apparent soon.

The next year, my darling Virtual Boy Wario Land released. Take a gander.

Here he's drawn notably slimmer than usual, spooky, though this is rather inconsistent.

Not much else to say here or for the next couple years outside of the advent of his 3D model, so let's skip to 1998

Behold, Wario Land II !

Would you look at that, someone's shortened his sleeves!

To emphasize Wario's cartoonish levels of strength of which he displays in his games frequently, the designers have given Wario permission to show off his enviable biceps. (Mario spinoffs went back and forth on this for about 6 years. The funniest example to me is Wario having short sleeves in Mario Tennis, yet having long sleeves in its sequel.)

Wario has reached the conclusion of his design evolution, good for him. Well, there's WarioWare, but that's for another day.

Despite these tweaks to his design, Wario is still very much a goof, so all his transformations are just comedy.

Initially, Wario's power-ups were just that. Wario utilized a variety (3) of hats, all of which granted him abilities such as a flame attack or a flying dash attack.

(look at that, incredible.)

The world turned upside-down on, once again, the release of Wario Land II. Those deranged folks back at Nintendo get a lot of yucks inflicting life-threatening slapstick onto Wario, all because Wario is naturally goofy, poor guy.

Thus, "Wario with a Dragon Hat that Breathes Fire" became "Wario Running Uncontrollably on Fire" and "Wario with an Eagle Hat that Helps Him Glide" became "Wario Got Stung by a Bee and His Balloon Head Gives Him Flight" among others, there's a lot more than three this time.

I love this guy.

[positivelybeastly]

I just have to ask: Why did you show up to that jazz club wearing Simon's old safari jacket? (Or one that looks just like it)

And assuming that it is Simon's jacket, how exactly did it end up in your possession?

". . . Well, it was a. Nostalgic sort of night, you know?"

Crickets chirp. You're not getting out of this with that answer, Hank.

"W-Well, first off, it wasn't his old jacket. I don't own pieces of Simon's old wardrobe."

That Simon knows about, anyway.

"I was, if you'll recall, in something of a hurry that day, having done the mad dash from Muir Island to New York so that I could see Wondy again, so I didn't have much time to pack a bag. I needed clothes for a social occasion, and so I went out and bought some."

Which was how he'd ended up buying a replica of Simon's old jacket, which he'd been. Lucky, enough, to locate.

Hmm. This wasn't helping his case.

"So, I thought it would be funny. To turn up wearing the jacket. Sort of like old times."

The old times where you'd wear Simon's jacket and no shirt underneath, Hank?

Hank squints.

"It's not gay, if that's what you're thinking. It was a joke. I wanted to make Wondy smile. Is that such a crime? Why the third degree, huh? Huh? Huh? I bet you have things that you do for fun that would seem strange to people not in on the joke!"

So defensive, Hank . . .

"This conversation is over."

[smirk47]

In honor of the one, the only, the magnificent 🎉🎉Titface (@dufrau)🎉🎉 on this, the day of her birth, I was inspired to dust off my meager and ever-so-rusty Adobe Illustrator skills for the first time in 10+ years to create a small artistic tribute.

Inspired by:

if you look (and know what to look for) by titface

with just a wee dash of (We Took That Holy Ride) Ourselves To Know (aka Bigfootverse) by titface

@dufrau: You are not only a fantastic writer, but also a total badass and a delight to share a little corner of the internet with! Thanks so much for sharing your wonderful stories with us - they have been a true source of joy, laughter, and catharsis during a very stressful year.

Happy Birthday, friend!!! I hope it is an excellent day and the start of an even better year! 💜🍻🥓🎂🫘🏳️‍🌈

Credit/reference image sources under the cut:

Background image: https://www.pexels.com/photo/silhouette-of-trees-under-starry-night-1361215/

Original water tower reference image: https://www.flickr.com/photos/80651083@N00/1814803669/sizes/z/

Bigfoot reference image: https://www.amazon.com/Safari-Ltd-Mythical-Realms-Construction/dp/B07HJ9PZ1T

[astravis]

AU where despite Fenton's alter ego getting out, he's still treated with disinterest by the student body. Because they like it when he's the heroic, wise-cracking ghost, not awkward, nerdy Fenton. Sure, Dash lays off the bullying, but Fenton isn't getting fawned over. His interest only spikes when he turns into Phantom– same with the student body. (Insert Tucker joking about how the jocks still technically want him dead)

Tucker, being a furry, comments on how common this is for popular fursuiters. "And when Safari Roo was walking around the con suitless, she didn't receive as much attention. And it hurt a little to know that people cared more about the costume than the person behind it. And it’s not like what she looks like without the head is a hard-to-find secret."

[realsafari]

Hey safari, hope your day is going good! Always a pleasure when you show up on my dash, so felt I should share the love!

🥺