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[incorrectbatfam]

Dick: Do we really force you to do things you don't want to do?

Tim: Yeah, but it's okay.

Bruce: How is it okay?

Tim: I promised myself if I ever got a family I'd do whatever they said. Really, I'm lucky you found me before a cult did.

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Dick: My mattress is strapped to eight roombas and I leave all my doors open at night so the roombas can go where they need to go. I wake up where they want me to be. I trust their decisions.

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Each kid has a different sweatshirt from a college that Bruce dropped out of send tweet

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[in the car]

Damian: Aww.

Selina: What's wrong?

Damian: It's gone.

Selina: What is?

Damian: My tarantula.

Bruce: *tenses up*

Selina: Okay, was it in the jar when we left the house?

Damian: Well yeah, I was just feeding it.

Bruce, paralyzed with fear: Selina, find the spider.

Selina: Bruce, I'm trying.

Bruce: Selina.

Selina: Don't stress me, sweetie. Where were you feeding it?

Damian: On the seat.

Bruce: I have a phobia of spiders, you know this!

Selina: Bruce, just calm down.

Bruce: Oh God, oh man...

Selina: Look under your seat, look under your dad's seat.

Damian: I did, it's not there.

Selina: Sweetie, does it have a name? Can we call it?

Bruce: Oh God.

Damian: Fred.

Selina: Fred? Okay. Fred?! Come here, Fred!

Bruce: OH GOD, OH MAN!

[later at school]

Damian: ... Which is how I was able to bring him here to show everyone today.

Damian: *holds up empty jar*

Damian: Aww.

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any headcanon or promp about the Batfamily reacting to photos of baby Damian, Bonus if there are photos of Jason holding Damian ?

Harper: Is that a potato?

Steph: It looks more like a misshapen bread loaf to me.

Cass: Potato bread. Can confirm, that's a thing. I eat food.

Duke: Guys, don't be mean. It's obviously a naked mole rat.

Barbara: No, it's too big for a mole rat. I think it's a shaved capybara.

Tim: Poor thing. It belongs in the wild, where it can roam free.

Bruce: All of you, stop that. It's Damian as a baby.

Dick: We know. We're talking about the thing holding him.

Jason: ...

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Bruce: Listen, kid.

Robin!Dick: Please, call me Dick.

Bruce: I’d rather not. If I named you, I could get attached.

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Tim: Why would you give a knife to Damian?!

Jason: He said he felt unsafe!

Tim: Well, now I feel unsafe!

Jason, reaching into his jacket: You want a knife?

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Tim saw the Batman movie and said "Now that's an idea"

Tim Drake debuted in 1989, the same year as Love Shack and Lunchables

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brand new terrible ship idea: lex Luther x black mask

Ship name: Blex

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Not DC related but I'm trying to settle a debate:

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Stephanie: Do you remember that horrible roommate you had back in college?

Harper: You mean YOU?

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Tim Drake debuted in 1989, the same year as Love Shack and Lunchables

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So I (24F) just moved to Gotham and something kept knocking against my fire escape so I removed it entirely. Then last night I heard a yell and two minutes later Batman came knocking at the door asking if I could put it back because it's "obstructing justice" or whatever but I really don't wanna.

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Donna: You guys don't do anything halfway, do you?

Wally: Nope.

Dick: We're two halves of a whole idiot.

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Tim: Do you think different paints have different tastes?

Damian: They do.

Dick: Why did you say that with such certainty?

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Dick: You know when something crazy happens and someone's like "it's okay, I've seen way worse"?

Dick: Everything I saw my brother do today is gonna be my "way worse."