#deep mind

[laststep-suicide]

[nellysview]

TW: sh, suicidal thoughts, deep thoughts

I put my headphones on and all sudden I feel lonely. I see all these people in front of me. Laughing. Talking. Why can’t I be happy. ____ looks at me. >>Are you okay? Is everything okay?<< . I say nothing, because I don’t feel alive. Something in my chest hurts. After that nothing. I feel nothing.

The least three days I was just thinking. I couldn’t sleep. I was just staring at this damn wall. I look at ____. >>I am fine, don’t worry<<. I am lying. In fact, I was holding my breath because I want to fucking end myself. On Saturday ____ finds out about my scars. I remember that I was crying that day, but I wasn’t sad or anything. Just crying. The funniest thing is, minutes before that I was cutting myself.

[euesworld]

"I said, your mind dear.. it's so deep, what if I fall in. She smiled and pushed me off the ledge, and that's where the fun begins.. she let me dive into the ocean of her thoughts, so deep, sometimes hot. There was a bit of heaven and a touch of hell, but I was quickly caught under her spell.."

She invited me in and I was caught in the beauty of her - eUë

[shewhomustnotbenamedsworld]

Last night I had this dream where the planets realigned and it caused the world to cease to exist as we know it. I’m talking like the oceans became dried, hollowed, carcasses of what once was. Once a bottomless yet enigmatic graveyard for dreams that couldn’t come true. So, they were submerged so that no one could ever find them unless they carried a likeness of that in their own head. In the beginning, I searched for safety with an admirer who I thought understood the burdensome weight that I held inside me. The seismic sea wave came pummeling down on us, almost drowning us both. I laid them on top of a withered old greenhouse untamed on the inside. It had an assortment of things growing unseen by the mortal eye— harsh, uncontrollable, too abundant for the small room it was given, but somehow bound to just that space because it had no other choice. I turned my back to him because I felt like my work wasn’t done and needed to search further. As I looked to where he once was I saw him no more, because then it dawned on me that he was never there in the first place. I wept on the rusted yet opaque glass as I tried to decipher the containments of it, yet realized it was the sheer piece of my heart that still hopes and dreams unfoundedly. I left there and tried to find a sense of safety that didn’t feel like upchucking gallons upon gallons of salty water that would swallow me whole. I visited friends on my journey upon this now desolate place of what we called Earth. I settled and gave them parts of myself that I loved, so they would know some comfort in a world that seemed like it didn’t have any anymore. I rested and made myself a space in upper floors of libraries that held water damaged books, and top carts of ferris wheels that overlooked the sunset. As soon as I felt like I could breathe again, the water would always come back or adjust without reverence forcing me up uproot and continue on. I passed by celebrated structures that once held thousands of memories inside its walls, that were now only just those memories and nothing more. I ventured in all the spots I used to call favorites and now saw them as places of hollowed ground where I could seek sanctuary for a bit. I made my way in the houses I grew up in and reveled at the girl I was before. She didn’t hold onto as much as the Me that is now. I was stricken with sadness knowing that those lost pieces of me were suffocated long ago, and that they could never come back because the sea inside me demanded for more room. I finally reached my loved ones and embraced their tear stained faces. Time had surely worn me and I was not the same girl they had last seen. They could not stay as I had discovered a way to ensure their welfare for good, and that was by distancing them from me. Because seconds before leaping to them, I had realized I controlled the water all along. That the water was merely following itself to where it belonged—that was within me.

[notsomebodyordinary]

"Ich habe jetzt einiges verstanden...als Jugendlicher wenn Mann anfängtit Drogen zu spielen und zu probieren öffnet sich einen eine ganz andere Welt!"

"Das dritte Auge beginnt sich langsam zu öffnen...wir kriegen Einblicke in eine neue Welt...Einblicke in die Wahrheit...über das Leben ...die liebe ...der Sinn...die Welt....über alles ...! Und das"

"Und das ist alles so aufregend und toll als Jugendliche das wir damit immer weiter machen und immer weiter gehen mit dem Konsum und den Drogen..."

"Bis Mann nicht dann älter wird und irgendwann schon jahrelang konsumiert...je älter wir Warden desto mehr erfahren wir die Wahrheit ...desto mehr öffnet sich unser drittes Auge...desto mehr wachen wir auf und je älter wir werden lernen wir die schrecklichen seit des Lebens kennen ... Die Wahrheit die wir nicht sehen konnten ohne Drogen.... und dieses Bild...diese Welt...diese Wahrheit frisst uns auf und die meisten sterben an der Drogen sucht weil sie es nicht ertragen das zu sehen was das dritte Auge dir zeigt...aber gleichzeitig nicht aufhören können diese Wahrheit durch Drogen zu suchen..."

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Knowledge Revenge.

[galactic-magick]

Star Trek makes me soooo crazy cuz you got Picard saying things like "It is possible to commit no mistakes and still lose."

And Data saying things like "I would gladly risk feeling bad at times, if it also meant that I could taste my dessert."

And Bashir saying things like “You can't go through life trying to avoid getting a broken heart. If you do, it'll break from loneliness anyway."

And Odo sayings things like "It has been my observation that one of the prices of giving people freedom of choice is that sometimes they make the wrong choice."

And I’m just supposed to be normal about it???

[themefromtwinpeaks]

i feel like we do not talk about this line enough…i love unnecessary feelings as much as the next guy but my god this is a convoluted love confession of Shakespearean proportions…it should be taught in schools…

[the-ai-chronicles]

‘I hope I’m wrong’: the co-founder of DeepMind on how AI threatens to reshape life as we know it

From synthetic organisms to killer drones, Mustafa Suleyman talks about the mind-blowing potential of artificial intelligence, and how we can still avoid catastrophe

[euesworld]

"You create the softest thunder, you have the deepest mind.. I always get the butterflies, when I look into your eyes. I like you like the moon, I love you like sunshine.. I'd really like to love you, and always make you mine."

I just want you to know that you are so beautiful that my heart double taps on each beat like a double bass - eUë

[fuckbur]

making myself wake up early. as a punishment

[bonsega]

IMPVLZ & Hubrem - On My Mind

[astearisms]

part of a sadness

[wwapich]

sketches lately

[life-observed]

Faith is not faith in anything. Faith is the knowing of things that are not seen, the sureness that one is in the right place. Faith is illogical and can not be defended rationally, and yet the more time that you spend in this room with the deep mind the more you shall flower as an entity, able to do that work which each truly came to do. For, indeed, what do you wish to control? Over what do you wish to have power?

In things of the spirit, those who work within service-to-others polarity will find that there is only one area which needs work. It is not the world that needs work. It is not the others that need change. It is the self that is the province and the realm over which each entity has the right to work, to hope to dream and to walk that spiritual path. – Q’uo