#mental heath tw

[nellysview]

I was just casually scrolling on Tik Tok and then I heard a sound that made me cry immediately.

“But it made you stronger!”

“I was a child. I didn’t need to be stronger. I needed to be protected”

Can someone pls give me a hug? It just- it was too much for me rn.

[prendi-fiato-e-ricomincia]

[bunneclair]

A piece on my personal healing in the last 4 or so months after the ending of a very unhealthy relationship

For about seven years I was in an on and off relationship with an old friend of mine who I met online when we were both around 11 years old. It always went the same way; I would get into a relationship, it wouldn’t work out, I would get out of the relationship, and they would reach out to me before we inevitably entered a 3-4 month relationship and then the cycle would always restart. This is fairly typical of teenagers I think. Due to growing up together, both in very toxic environments, we did a lot of mutual damage to each other whether intentionally or unintentionally — most during about middle school, but enough that it left a lasting effect. The nature of our relationship was always toxic, and we had always been at odds and without proper communication, but the finality of this last ending in the relationship, although inevitably a positive change, certainly threw me for a loop before I could really begin to open my eyes and appreciate the weight that has been lifted from my shoulders. I am posting this for my own clarity and healing, as well as any others it may help who may relate to it, but I should add that if the person I am speaking of in this piece or any of their friends manage to get ahold of this and want to reach out to me; please don’t. I am happy. I hope you’re happy too, and if you aren’t, I hope that you can be. Have a good life. I was just as tired of fighting that battle as you were.

with that being said, much love to anyone who sees themself in a difficult situation or may relate to/understand my perspective. You are strong and I am glad if this will reach anyone in a way that is helpful.

Thank you :)

[idkmehhhhh]

Do you ever just stare at all the different food options you have and than just walk away knowing you can't let yourself eat any of it because same

[onlyoneofyouu]

yesterday I took my usual break from studying, I was celebrating taehyun's first post in days after what had happened and listening to soobin's live which, as always, helps me to take a moment off my mind and relax my nerves, when I learned in real time that moonbin passed away. i was shocked by the news and i couldn't believe it. i only know a few astro's songs and i've never been a fan of them, but i liked him a lot, i knew him a little bit through his time as an mc, for his solo music and his friendship with other idols, especially monsta x. i am very sorry that such a thing happened, i send my sincere condolences to his family and fans.

to any fan who may read this: please be kind to yourself, take the time you need, take a break from social media if needed, don't feel guilty if you don't feel like interacting with content (and i mean any type, even photos/posters), it's okay to not feel/want to listen to his music for a while. remember that it's never stupid to mourn someone, even if you never met them, your feelings are valid so let yourself feel them, cry if you need to, talk with someone. and please remember that someone else’s mental health struggles are never, ever, your responsibility, so don't blame yourself for what happened.

for anyone who finds and reads this: i may not know what you are going through, and i know the world is not an easy place at all, that it can be difficult to act due to difficult circumstances, that some people have much easier access to support and safe spaces than others.. but please take care of yourself, even on the hardest days. do what you can to put your health first always: take the time you need when you need it, get off social media when it gets too heavy, leave the people who hurt you behind even when it's hard, don't be ashamed to seek the help you may need. i hope you know that you are not alone, even if you feel like it, and you are loved, even when you think you aren't, and I hope there are and will be people in your life who show it to you how you deserve. i send you all my support for whatever you are going through. i truly hope better days are ahead of us.

and please always be kind and respectful to others as well, you never know what they are going through.

for a couple of months i've been struggling with things myself so I'm not in top shape, but if anyone needs to talk I'm here, even to just listen.

thank you for reading.

🤍

[pikaychuwu]

i did a brave.. will i have a meltdown? anything is possible 🥹

[duusheen]

Daphne has been feeling a little sad and unmotivated for a few days, so she decided to consult her doctor. During the check-up, she was diagnosed with postpartum depression 💔

[haley-harrison]

washing down Xanax with an energy drink has got to be in the top ten most neurodivergent things I've ever done, lmao

[talk-to-themoon]

I will rot and wither and you’ll just watch.

[kid-called-crow]

The way ocd is shown in most media is SO stupid like no Rebecca this is not quirky my room is not squeaky clean in fact i haven't had the energy/time in two weeks to put the socks away

[hajdu42]

[nellysview]

how are you? like really? how are you? whats going on in your life?

I am not okay lately. Everything has changed in my life and I don’t know how to deal with it. I am losing people and I can’t change it or be a better person. I am not myself rn or I never was. It’s difficult. I feel like everything I do is wrong and I know it’s wrong but still there is no way to make it right.

I need time to change. I need time to focus on myself ig but it’s so hard. I can’t even deal with my own thoughts. Ig that’s why I have always been so much into other people’s thoughts.

I have got diagnosed with depression and it’s kind of a relief but also a curse because people have to deal with me and it’s difficult for them so they need space.

Idk if this makes any sense but that’s how I feel. Thanks for the question tho and thanks for your caring<3

[prendi-fiato-e-ricomincia]

brutta bestia l’ansia

[that-was-a-bit-stupid-of-you]

if you self harm for "attention" you still deserve help and that's not a bad thing

[idkmehhhhh]

Well showers no longer sting but I do get dizzy when I stand up again. (If you know you know)

[luci-in-the-stars]

Comic Book Sale|| Sam & Luci

TIMING: Saturday after Thanksgiving LOCATION: Escape your Fate Comics PARTIES: @luci-in-the-stars & @uncannysam SUMMARY: Luci goes to the comic book store after Thanksgiving to find a Pokemon book. Sam and Scout, despite being on a break, decide to help. CONTENT WARNING: Slight Sibling death tw (mentioned), Mental Health warning (Talk about grief loosing loved ones pretty explicitly)

Black Friday and all the hustle and bustle had come and gone, and of course, Sam had opted to stay closed that day. Besides, if people had wanted to buy comic books that badly, they could come when she reopened Saturday. And surprisingly the store had been filled most of the day. But by afternoon a lull finally started to happen which meant Sam could have a break. And a break she needed, “Okay, Scout. You know the drill. If anyone comes in while I’m in the back, come and get me.” Her smile was soft and inviting as she gave the dog ear scratches and a kiss on the head.

Grabbing her phone from the counter, she went to the back and pulled out the lunch she had brought from home – leftover from her parents house. The best kind of meal. Taking off the lid, she put the small plate into the microwave and hit start. For once, in quite a while, her mind had been clear, and the sleep she finally succumbed to, at her mom and dad’s house during the holiday, had been what she had needed. No, weird images of people with wings and scales had seemed to bother her, giving her some piece of mind.

“I have waited all day for this.” As the microwave shut off and the beeping rangout through the back office, Sam was just about to take her food out when she heard Scout barking. Seriously? Every damn time.

Sam, defeated knowing her food would probably be cold by the time she came back, walked towards the front, “Hey, everything in the store is buy two, get half off the third and everything in the boxes on that table over there” Sam motioned to a back corner, “is 99 cents. Let me know if you have any questions.”

—

Luci was in a lot of ways trying to find something to get Milo for the holidays. It was weird and awkward, and while she had figured out his birthday she wasn’t sure she had another plan. It wasn’t quite doom time yet, but she really wanted to figure it out before she had to think of other things. 

So she ended up in a comic shop, not quite sure if anything here her brother would like. It was the - sixth store of the day? Biting her lip and looking down at her list she wanted to at least try it - it was empty looking and maybe she could find something small to build on. At the dog barking she looked up and realized that she was in there alone. Feeling perhaps she wasn’t supposed to be here she moved to leave before she heard someone. 

“Oh - so you aren’t closed? Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention. Oh okay - that sounds nice. I’ll let you know,” Luci said, nodding as Sam continued and she looked back down at her list of things she thought her brother might like. “Uh - do you know anything about Pokemon? Is there a comic with that? - Sorry I’ve been trying something for my brother, and I’m pretty lost here. I can look around though, if you were doing something in the back. I’ll let you know if I am going to leave or something.” 

After all, it would be their first Christmas without Gen, and Luz knew nothing would change that but she wanted to at least try. She just didn’t know what ‘try’ reasonably looked like. 

—

Looking down at Scout, Sam shot a warm smile in his direction. He was her best bud, and she was grateful to have him next to her. The days had seemed quieter and lonelier without Zach around. He had been her person. Her rock, and the one who was always there when things got tough. Though it had been a couple of months since he had passed, it still felt like yesterday. The one person she had swore she would always be there for, and she wasn’t. And now Thanksgiving had passed, and he wasn’t around to bring her some of his mom’s potato flake mashed potatoes and canned gravy or that slimy canned cranberry sauce he always threatened her with.

“No, I was just in the back taking care of some things. I’m open until 11 tonight, so you’ve got plenty of time to look around, ask questions, hang out.” Sam didn’t really care if people hung out at the shop until the lights were shut off. She had always had it in mind to make it feel welcoming and like a safe place for people to come to if they needed an escape, just like comic books had always been for her. It’s partly why she had named the store Escape Your Fate.

“Uh, I think I have some graphic novels. I’ll show you where they’re at.” Stepping over Scout, she walked towards where she kept the books for young readers. There was a variety of options that had included Scooby Doo, Archie comics, and…”Here ya go. I don’t have many, but depending on when you need it, I can always order something. Shipping can vary though, especially with the weather starting to get worse during the colder season.” Sam picked up the three different novels and handed them to her customer.

— 

At the idea that she wasn’t intruding Luci nodded lightly glad that she wasn’t. She didn’t like taking up other people’s space after all, especially lately. After all, through a series of events she now was on her brother's couch taking up more of his time then she should. Luz didn’t always think this way, didn’t always think that she was taking up space that she shouldn’t, but well what was all of this if not proof that she was. 

Still when the other showed her where the books were her eyes lit up a little bit, glad she had gotten something right. She had written down things Milo liked - if she was honest she did that with everyone she knew hoping that it would come up one day - but it was somewhat foreign to her. “Oh - Thank you. I really appreciate your help,” Luci said, taking the books in her hand for a minute, flipping through the first one and then nodding lightly. “I’ve been trying to find something that I can copy for his present. I’m trying to paint the little creatures - and sorry you probably don’t want to here but I think this one will work. Could I have this one please?” There was a sort of relief there, knowing that she had a plan now that would work and she could get the colors correct. She couldn’t seem to get any copies to do that well in print. 

— 

Sam watched as the girl looked the books over. It was always exciting to her to see what people were interested in. Their reasons for coming into the store. She, of course, had the regulars who would stop in and pick up their weekly subscription box and others who would just wander in looking for something to kill time. She often got a variety of questions, and she couldn’t answer them off the top of her head, she would search for the answer. Helping people had always been something she enjoyed, especially when they shared a common interest with her.

“Yeah, no problem.” Sam gently took the three books and put back the two she didn’t want, where they came from, “So are you an artist?” She loved hearing about aspiring artists. She had dabbled in inkwork and creating comics herself as more of a side hobby, but had never tried to go pro with it.

Sam made her way to the front of the store and stepped behind the counter ready to ring up the graphic novel, when the girl was ready, “And, please, if you want to look anymore, be my guest. There’s no rush. I can keep this up here until you’re ready.” She laid the book on the counter and sat down.

— 

Luci was slightly buzzing at the idea of finally having what she needed, and perhaps she’d give Milo the book later after Christmas too. It seemed lately her plans never seemed to go the way she wanted them, but this was a simple enough victory that she should be able to do so. At the question though Luci blinked and then shook her head. 

“Oh - no I’m not. I’m not very good at - uh ‘artistic expression’” she said her hands going up to quote the words her old art teacher used to tell her. While Luz had always been good at copying or drawing things she saw - she never quite got ‘it’. No one could really tell her what ‘it’ was - but she assumed it was something about how it was supposed to ‘move someone’. Her technical drawings, although detailed and in their own way probably pretty - never moved anyone really. “ I’m just good at copying - My brother is though - he’s a really good Artist.  I’m just planning on painting some of the pokemon onto the handle of some crochet hooks I found - and I couldn’t get a good read on what the colors were.” She babbled partially worried she had disappointed the other with her answer, and wanted to show that she did still like art - even if she didn’t get it. 

“Oh - okay. I will,” Luci said with a little nod wondering if there was anything in the store she might be interested in. She finally had some time to read now that she didn’t have to be in so many clubs. Maybe some of her other friends liked some of the comic books around here, and if she read them she’d have something to talk about. It was enough of a motivation that she started looking, curious about the comic books she’d only briefly saw her brother read. 

“Um - if you don’t mind me asking, what would you recommend if you were just starting out reading comic books?” Luci said after a few minutes, getting overwhelmed. “I’ve never actually read any but they look cool.” 

— 

So her meal was getting cold, but having someone to talk to made Sam’s day better than it was. The holidays had been hard, and she had been dreading them for quite a while now. But with a customer who was new to the world of comic books and needing some guidance currently in her store, it helped to take her mind off of things, “I don’t think you have to have artistic expression to enjoy yourself. And copying is how I started out.” She didn’t know her history, but she knew making copies could get your hands moving the way they needed to. “I think he’ll love it, especially because it’s coming from the heart, you know? Much better than store bought gifts. Plus, putting these characters on crochet hooks is a skill within itself. Don’t sell yourself short.” Sam smiled softly.

Grabbing her phone, she noticed a text from her mom had come in. Thumbing through the message about coming over again, Sam started replying back to give the young woman some space, so she didn’t feel as if she was imposing. When she finished the message, she put her phone back down, just in time to hear the question – her bread and butter.

Sam stood up from the stool and walked back around the counter and over to where she was, “That’s a big ask. But I can definitely help. I think we should start by narrowing it down first though. Are there any particular superheroes you like? Or are you more of a horror fan? What do you think you might vibe with?”

—

Luci wasn’t quite sure if she agreed with the other’s words, but it did make her smile a little at the thought. She was pretty sure Gen would have said something similar, and while it might have normally made her sad, it didn’t. “You are right, at least about me enjoying it. I do a lot of technical drawings and things like that. I just don’t think I’m really an ‘artist’ artist if that makes sense.” 

At the idea that her brother might like her gift she smiled a little brighter with a little more hope. “I hope so. It’s really my biggest idea at the moment. With finals and stuff - winter kind of came up quicker than I thought it would.” Part of that was, if she was being honest, because she had more things in her life now. Instead of the drum and ache of what had happened she now had things to look forward too. 

“Oh - Uh,” Luci rocked lightly on her feet trying to think. “I don’t mind horror and I don’t know many superheroes. I liked She-ra when I saw it. Are there any stories like that?” Luci said, trying to narrow down what she might like. She didn’t want anything hard, or particularly scary and the show was one she liked a lot. It did feel a little childish, but the other woman didn’t seem particularly like one that would judge that.  “Or - oh like the powerpuff girls? I used to love them when I was little. Something like that.” 

____ 

“Nah, you’re an artist in my book. Even technical drawings take craft and skill. Not everyone can draw a perfectly symmetrical shape.” Sam had seen so many young hopefuls come into the store. She had even been one herself and secretly still was. She had even slipped a few of her own works into the Indigenous comic books just to see if there were ever any bites. And while this person may have been visiting just to pick out something to copy and maybe something to get invested in, it didn’t stop her from trying to be encouraging.

“Winter does that every year. It’s like no matter how much you try to prepare for it, it still sneaks up on you.” Sam’s mind had been occupied by other things, and just like her customer, she had let time get away from her. It was easy to do that when you remained in your own head, but the store had been keeping her busy and was reminding her of what time of the year it was with the uptick in sales.

Her ideas were good ones that Sam could work with. And by the sounds of them, she knew something too scary wasn’t the vibe, but also a strong female lead. She had just the suggestions, “So if you’re looking for She-ra, I do have a section dedicated to Strong Females in Comics. Powerpuff Girls I think are still over there, but they might be back where Pokemon and Scooby Doo are. Oh, and if you like something a little more…supernatural…” Just walk outside. “I do have Sabrina the Teenage Witch also where She-ra is.” She led the brunette over to the section she was talking about.

—

Luci wasn’t quite sure how to take the compliment so she nodded. After all, it was a skill and one an alchemist needed. She wasn’t sure if she’d ever be able to make little figures that people adored though, but then again she wasn’t sure if she wanted to either. She still had time though, to figure out what she wanted to do other than being a spellcaster. 

“Yeah, it does seem to do that a lot,” Luci said wondering how time flowed for the other. Normally, she passed by at a reasonable pace for her. Lately though it seemed to be leaping over large sections of time. She supposed growing up did that. 

Luci followed the other amazed that she could figure out something she might want to read. There was a bit of excitement, new knowledge to be gained and maybe even to share with others. “Oh - I’ve never heard of that one before. I’m assuming it’s about a Witch?” It would be a little ironic if so, but that didn’t mean it wouldn’t be fun.  

—

It was as if time stood still at moments and others, as if it was flying by at a blur. Time, along with life, was a funny thing. “I think time, in general, does that though, especially when you’ve got other things on your mind.” She shook off the thought of Zach, not wanting it to bring her down any further than the current holiday already had.

Sam could see the excitement in her new comic friend, and it made her happy. That was one of the best parts of her job, “Sabrina? It’s a classic. It’s been turned into a TV show a couple of times. The comics aren’t really scary. More campy, if anything, but the most recent adaptation for streaming is definitely dark, and if that’s not your thing, I wouldn’t recommend it.” Never in a million years did Sam think she’d be living in a real life episode of Sabrina at any point in time.

“I’m Sam by the way. I’m really the only one who works here, so if you decide to come back after today, it’ll be me and Scout here to help.” She motioned to her dog who was laying on the floor near the counter. “And remember, it’s buy two and get half off the third. I don’t know how much time you have, but I think the 99 cent boxes might have some more comics with female leads, if you feel like digging. I try to keep them in alphabetical order, but it doesn’t last long.”

—

Luci nodded, her mind now focused on the idea of a new story and not herself at the moment. After all, there was something to look forward to and read, and maybe someone else in the town would like to talk to her about it. She wondered, briefly in a small part of her mind, if her sister would have liked the comic. Maybe she would have found it silly. Luz would have liked that. “Oh - yeah I don’t know if I would watch it, but I trust you that the comic would be fun. Maybe during halloween I’ll take a look at it,” Luci said, thankful at the warning and looking through the comics herself and settling on one of them to get. At the other’s name Luci looked up and said, “ Oh - I didn’t introduce myself. I’m Luci. I think I will, if you don’t mind. The store is really nice. It’s nice to meet you and Scout as well.” She also found Sam very nice to talk to, something she didn’t want to reveal in case that was annoying. At the idea of a sale she nodded and said, “I’ll take a look there too. Thank you, Sam.” Maybe she could find a couple of stories that would keep her entertained. It would be nice to have a little escape.