#don't reblog this we do not need this bullshit connected to me

[aerodaltonimperial]

I did promise that I would try to explain how horrible (soul-crushing) the publishing world is, so at least people understood that I’m standing on the wreckage of all my self-confidence, so here’s the super abridged version. I suspect most people don’t know what it takes to be trad published—for our purposes here, trad published is going to be published by a major publisher with distribution. Normally this is the Big 5 but some of the smaller houses would still count here. We are not counting indie pubs here, because they have no distribution (meaning they are not in libraries or book stores), and I have already had experience with them and it was horrifically disappointing.

So you’ve written a book. That’s great. Now you have to try and find a literary agent, because you can’t submit to any of the Big 5 (normally) without an agent doing it for you, so you have to embark into the query trenches. Querying is where you spend a shit-ton of time researching lit agents (and weeding out the schmagents and the agencies with bad reps by trolling forums and somehow tapping into a whisper network; yeah, good luck with that if you aren’t in the biz already) and then you send them a little letter about your book and anywhere from 5 to 25 pages of the manuscript itself (depending on what they ask for, and every agent is different). The opening pages, so you’ve hopefully spent three weeks constantly tearing those pages apart and re-writing them, because you have approximately 3 seconds to be AMAZINGLY GOOD and catch their eye.

Agents all rep different age categories and genres. You have to filter through them to find the ones that rep what you write, and are open to queries (many are NEVER open, or open only to referrals from existing clients, or open only to expensive conference live-pitches, so again, good luck!) Some of them will throw up MSWLs (manuscript wish lists) and then you might find one that is asking for something very similar to what you wrote, and can toss it their way. Depending on what you write, you might have 30 agents to query (niche genres) or 100 agents to query (romance, women’s fiction, thrillers).

Agents are extremely busy. On average, the response time can be anywhere from 10 minutes to 2 years (no, I’m not kidding). Most of the lit agencies have a rule where you can’t submit to more than one agent at a time, so you are stuck waiting for the first rejection before you can query another agent there, and in at least a third of the situations, you will simply never get it. You’ll have to mark it as “closed, no response” after about 120 days and assume it’s a no. Some agencies STILL run by the “no from one is a no from all” which is BULLSHIT so you have to REALLY HOPE the one agent in the agency you picked to query will like your shit cause you can’t query anyone else.

And then you wait for the responses to roll in. Most will be form rejections. A few might be requests for more (partial or full manuscripts). And like I said, probably a third or higher will simply never get back to you. Ever. Generally, after about 6 months, you are probably done querying, with some outliers who will take a year to get back to you if they do at all.

If you get LUCKY and one of them requests your full manuscript, hooray! Now you get to wait even longer while they read it. If you are VERY VERY lucky, that agent might offer representation on it. They have to really love it. They will ask you for a call (these are all done via Zoom or the like, nowadays). Sometimes, you might get an R&R—or, a revise & resubmit, where the agent asks for changes. There is no guarantee that doing them will please them enough to get an offer on it. General consensus is that R&Rs only slightly raise your odds for getting an offer, and about 70% of them will still result in a rejection.

Fun thing about getting an offer of rep: industry standard is that you ask for 2 weeks to contact all the OTHER agents who still have your query and/or materials so you can let them know that you have an offer. And this is where my LEAST FAVORITE FUCKING PART of this industry comes in. It’s practically the tenet that publishing was built on—people only want shit that someone else already wants. Any outstanding queries, you “nudge” to let them know you have an offer and your timeline. Any outstanding submissions, you let them know they gotta read fast. You WILL get a shit ton of agents asking for your manuscript here, because SUDDENLY SOMEONE ELSE WANTS IT so it must be great. (On my only successful manuscript, my request rate for materials was 8% pre-offer. After my offer, it shot up to 60%. I will die furious about this.)

You may, if you are super duper lucky, even get multiple offers, and then you have to decide which agent you are going to choose.

So if you get this far, GOOD JOB. You have beaten 95% of the other writers out there. You are still doing all of this for free. And you still have more to go through! From here on out, now that you are with an agent, you get to go on “submission,” where your agent sends your book out to editors that they have (hopefully) matched up genres/likes with. And it’s just like querying, only your agent does it instead of you, and you sit at home and wait EVEN MORE TIME for overworked, underpaid editors to somehow fall in love with your book.

Maybe one of them does! Then you get to go to something called “second reads.” This is where the whole TEAM at the publishing house reads it and most of the time, they all have to agree. Then you have to go to ACQUISITIONS, which is a meeting at the publishing house where the editor has to pitch your book and ask the rich CEOs for money to offer on it. Your book can die at any one of these milestones: it can be rejected by editors, it can be rejected at second reads, and it can be refused at acquisitions. This process takes anywhere from 1 day (if you are super lucky and probably shit gold) to 2 years, and when all the editors are exhausted, your book is officially dead on sub.

If you DO HAPPEN TO GET THROUGH THIS and get an ACTUAL BOOK DEAL, you are the lucky 1%. And you might finally, FINALLY, get paid for the work you have done. (In installments, spread out over years, depending on how much of an advance you get.)

Or, like a whooooole bunch of us, you end up figuring out that your agent, for whatever reason, isn’t working for you. Maybe you want to write a genre next that they don’t rep. Maybe they leave the industry for whatever reason. Maybe you have a mismatch of communication/expectations/needs. Maybe they suck at being an agent and stop doing what they are supposed to do (like mine). And then you end up either leaving your agent or getting dropped by your agent, and you are back to square one all over again.

Remember that every time you have to query again, or go on submission again, you have to have a new book ready. The people who succeed at this industry have time, money, and luck; the more of those you have, the better you will do. A LARGE number of writers are bankrolled by a partner and/or parent and/or generational wealth who pays the bills for them, because otherwise, it’s pretty damn hard to find enough time to write as much as you need to.

And every single one of those rejections is going to eat away at you, inch by inch by inch, until you’ve amassed more than 150 of them representing all the times you just weren’t fucking good enough. Then you have to decide: do I keep doing this? It’s been years. It’s been double digit books. How much of my life and time am I going to waste on this fruitless quest? And I guess that’s the question you gotta answer lol.

[aroaceconfessions]

this one's for all the aros and aces out there that see the insanely unhealthy takes that amatonormativity spits out and conclude that allos must all be insane and have no self esteem and need to chill out/need to be on their own for a while to figure stuff out.

im aroace-spec but alloplatonic and i understand seeing amatonormative posts and going "wow allos are all insane?" because i was there for a while. i know how it is. so here's a few allo myths that im here to explain as best i can based on my own limited experiences; if any actual allos want to jump in and correct me in the comments/reblogs, feel free!

1) allos really do feel a "need" for a relationship meeting their attraction, and yes, food/hunger is a good analogy for this feeling. i think of it like an extra "need" meter, like if you copy-pasted the "need food" bar a few times and replaced "food" with "friends" or "romantic partner" or "sexual partner". obviously you won't physically die if you run low on your attraction meters but it is emotionally and psychologically damaging or even tortuous.

2) all the "I'm worthless without a partner" or "my life hasn't started until I'm married" bullshit is just amatonormativity. allos are very sad without their attraction need being met but if your self worth comes from whether or not all your needs are being met then there are bigger problems than just the unmet needs. looking forward to meeting someone that jives well with you + that you're attracted to is well and good but the moment your relationship status is the determining factor for your self esteem you're just buying into amatonormativity again.

3) yeah so basically a lot of allos talk about needing relationships and im here to say that they are not joking. we crave connection in a very deep-seated way and it's very difficult to just like... hold our breath, so to speak, and wait until we've figured stuff out before trying to pursue relationships. it's the kind of thing where you kind of have to work on it as you go i guess.

anyway it's interesting because like. there are pros and cons to having more or less needs. like i don't have to worry about maintaining my health in romantic or sexual attraction areas cause i just don't have those needs. which is definitely a perk. but it's also not bad to have those needs because that's cool too, you get to have a unique experience & relationship with those things.

anyway it just kind of feels like allo and aplaroace awareness kind of need to go hand in hand so we can all understand each other better. i just think there are a lot of misconceptions about what allo-ness actually is because especially in aspec circles we're used to hearing about it in the context of like, popular media and pushy family members and such.

[bramblewoodsims]

"A sickness ripped through me with uncontrollable ferocity until it burned me from the inside out. I died of overexertion, while laying comatose on Kristopher's couch. He tried his best. He always does." Lexi tells all...or, well, some. Transcript under the cut, since this was so dialogue-heavy! // [Previous Post] Lexi is by @dreamless-disco and the sitting and talking posepack is by @siimplysims, thank you!

A Stranger In Moonwood Mill (10/?)

reblogs over likes

TRANSCRIPT

Lexi: Wake up Sybil, you're not dreaming. Look at me.

Sybil: I can't, this isn't real.

Lexi: It is very much real. I am sorry to startle you. I held off as long as I could, but ghosts don't really get to decide when to pop in and out of limbo. There will be others like me coming, so you need to listen to me.

[The ghost, who introduces herself as Lexi Riverdance, spends the next hour explaining...a lot of things to Sybil.]

Sybil: That's...a lot. I'm having trouble taking all this in.

Lexi. It's alright. It IS a lot. ....so, yeah. Ghosts are real, and a lot of them happen to "live" in your house. It's where we all died.

Sybil: I'm so sorry.

Lexi: Kristopher Volkov used to live here, that's why he was so insistent on hanging around when you moved in. He was waiting for something to happen so that he could tell you without you thinking he was completely insane."

Sybil: Did you know him? When he lived here, I mean. Did you talk?

Lexi: Oh, yes. We all knew him in life.

Sybil: Oh. What kind of man is he, to have so many people he knows die in his house?

Lexi: That's where it gets difficult. Some story is mine to tell, but some is his alone.

Sybil: Bullshit! It's your death, it's all your story to tell!

Lexi: I know. And I can tell you parts. Sybil, how much do you know about Moonrise Mill?

Sybil: I know that everyone looks at me like they're waiting for someone else to tell them what to think of me.

Lexi: They are, in a way.

Sybil: (sarcastically) Great.

Lexi: Kristopher was telling the truth when he said he was a steward of the community. He's one of the primary leaders.

Sybil: He doesn't strike me as the town government type.

Lexi: On the contrary, he's exceedingly diplomatic and easygoing, to everyone except you I suppose. And I don't know if "town government" is how I would put it. Either way, you should talk to him. If he thinks you'll stick around, he'll be more forthcoming.

Sybil: He doesn't seem to like talking to me.

Lexi: He's afraid, for some reason. I don't know. It's not like him.

Sybil: I should be afraid of HIM! My house is full of ghosts and it's connected to him somehow?

Lexi: He's not...inherently dangerous. Let me paint you a picture. Several years ago, I was bitten by...something in the woods, very badly. Not a normal bite- the hospital wasn't an option, but Kristopher knew what to do. Or what to try, anyway. He tried to heal me, but he couldn't. The bite was not compatible with my body. A sickness ripped through me with uncontrollable ferocity until it burned me from the inside out. I died of overexertion, while laying comatose on Kristopher's couch. He tried his best. He always does. // Listen. I'm feeling myself start to slip back. I'll be gone soon. But I'll get pushed back here, through the rift, and some others will, too. I'll tell you what I can, when I can. But this town is tight-knit for a reason. Read that book you found at the library. It will tell you things that I can't. Kristopher would be upset with me. But you should decide if you're ready to stay here for the long haul. Then, talk to him. If you're ready to be a part of our community, he'll welcome you. Don't be afraid. Good luck.

[ventii-lous]

POV: You get into an argument and decide to leave PT I

Featuring: Venti, Albedo, Diluc, Kaeya

PT 2 : Zhongli, Xiao, Thoma and Ayato

A/N: Okay so this is the first time I'm doing something like this so sorry if anything is OOC. Reblogs, and likes are appreciated <33 Also note that Kaeya's part was kinda rushed cause I absolutely cannot seeing him ever hurt us...

[UNEDITED]

Venti

Venti had been recalling your argument the hour before and guilt was all he felt. He hadn't meant to say he was better off without you but he had and he knew it had hurt you.

As he approached your house he had made up his mind to apologise and make it up to you somehow. He however, hadn't expected to see your bags outside the front door with you tossing the keys through the mailbox.

"Y/N? Where are you going?" He said, confusion flooding his thoughts.

"I'm leaving..for a while." Y/N said, looking down.

Venti's heart dropped to his stomach as he tried to bring the words to his mouth but they were forced down as Y/N pulled her luggage past him.

Knees weak, he collapsed to the ground, grabbing onto the wall. He saw something glimmer on the road and he reached his hand out, fingers trembling slightly by the mere idea if what it was.

A gold ring. Their matching gold ring. With the sight of it, Venti allowed a single tear flow down his cheek. He knew he would always remind himself of the day his first and only love left him. The day he realised he was too naive despite his age.

Albedo

Whilst watching the reaction of his fifth experiment, he left the solutions to fizz up to the top of the glass beaker once again. He cursed himself for being clouded by the thoughts of you, your mouth, the way it closed abruptly, as if you had avoided saying something. He hated it sourly, He wanted you to feel safe to say what you pleased, despite knowing it would hurt him. He wanted to know the words that you wanted to say.

He slammed his fist down onto the work bench, ignoring the rolling pencils and flying paper. Sucrose watched from afar, concerned for both him, her family, and you, her closest friend. She knew there was a closer connection between the two of you.

"Sucrose, I'm..going out for a while, you'll be okay by yourself?" Albedo asked, already putting on his jacket and walking towards the door.

Sucrose hesitated as she thought of the package in her pocket. An envelope given from you. "Actually, Mr.Albedo, Y/N gave me something to give to you."

Sucrose pulled out an envelope and handed it to Albedo, watching him immediately rip it open. A letter fell into his hand and a metal object fell to the floor.

Sucrose gasped a little and she focused on Albedo whose eyes were wide open.

He didn't have to read the letter to know what it said but he opened it anyways.

I'm Sorry, Albedo

His world crashed and thunder struck in his heart, he lost the very thing that brought him meaning to what humans called living and now he had to pay the price.

Diluc

"I'm really busy right now, I don't have time for you or your bullshit Y/N, Get lost already.!"

Oh how he wished he could burn his words. He said the words without thinking. He raised his fist without meaning to. He knew as soon as the words had left his mouth and his hand had been raised that he had torn their relationship apart.

He watched silently as you packed your stuff from the door frame for your room. Now his.

He had already tried, begging, crying and apologising too many times to change your mind. Diluc's fists were closed and his arms were close to his body.

Despite all you said, he thought of trying one more time. "Look Y/N, I didn't mean to say it-"

"But you did, the damage is done Diluc, I..need some time, Okay?"

Diluc's eyes fell to your bag, "How long is some? Are you leaving forever? I can't..I can't live without you.."

Y/N stopped moving and turned to Diluc. "I..can't either..But if I had to choose between loving you and loving myself, We both know what I'll choose."

It wasn't a surprise to Diluc, he had always told her, Choose herself before others and now those words had become bittersweet to his ears.

Infact, he was kind of glad she was leaving him, he was about to hit her. About to. He would have never been able to deal with himself if he had. But he almost did and even that truth started storms in his head.

Y/N zipped her bag and walked past him. Diluc couldn't help but say one more thing before he let her go. "If you could ever find it in your heart to forgive me, that would be enough for me."

Y/N turned back before saying, "It would be a long time before I think I can."

Diluc felt tears brim but he kept a stoic face as Y/N left the house keys on the table and left the house for what may be the last time. It felt too quick.

He was glad; in a way. At least now she wouldn't have seen him fall into a chair and sob his pain away into the night. At least she couldn't see how much he hated himself for that moment.

Kaeya

Kaeya was devastated. Drunk and devastated. He hadn't seen you all day since your argument, and somehow he ended up in the Tavern.

"My my, why is such a young fella looking upset tonight?" Said a man, sitting a seat down from Kaeya.

He turned to face him and noticed he was a lot older than he was, perhaps in his late 60's.

"Just something with me and my wife..I know I'm in the wrong but I'm not sure if she would want to see me.."

The man sat quietly deep in thought than lit up his eyes, as if stumbling across a fond memory.

"Ahh, I remember being your age my lad, I was in a similar situation with my fiance. She was feisty and brave and definitely someone who would have lived to be a wonderful woman."

Kaeya sat up a little to hear what the man said, "I forgot our engagement ring in the park and she thought I had fallen out of love, oh how she was so wrong. Anyways, what I'm saying son is, these things happen but it can always be resolved, Instead of drinking here, return home and apologise, she may say no like my dear Phenelope but it may be the last time you talk to her."

The old man shrinked a little in his seat, as if the memory of his Fiance was a hard one to remember but it still lit a flame of hope in Kaeya.

He left his glass unfinished and dropped a few mora onto the counter for Diluc to collect later. Kaeya rehearsed several times in his head what he was gonna say to you on his journey home and each time gave him hope that you would forgive him and he could continue loving you.

The house lights were off. They were never off unless you both were out. 'Bizarre' he thought. The front door creaked open and immediately an aura flew out. Kaeya held his breathe as he switched the lights on and looked around the living room that came first. Everything if Y/N's was gone. Her socks, favourite books, even mug. It was all gone. Photos that hung on the window sill were all piled together on the coffee table.

Eyes widening, Kaeya found it harder to breathe. Had he come too late? He immediately ran to your bedroom and threw open your wardrobe, nothing of yours was left.

Kaeya fell onto the bed and stared at the ground. The realisation hit him like a brick and it only left an empty cold feeling in his heart.

Perhaps one day he would tell stories like the old man. About the one that left before he could even say goodbye. The next Phenelope..

[strawberryoverlord]

Hello! I need medication for life to prevent my lungs from collapsing, this implies permanent treatment with steroids, oxygen therapy, control of oxygen in the blood and antibiotics to prevent the development of bacteria in the lungs.

I'm afraid I have to insist on this because it may be the only way to get my treatment.

I need medication for life to keep my lungs from collapsing, this costs around $700 per month.

Things are really tough on me,I can’t afford. Please donate🖤

Bro I fucking said just fucking die already you are not real stop fucking messaging me how are you fucking scammers this fucking stupid you literally messaged me before? Get a fucking fucking hobby, get a real fucking job. Like you are a literal parasite and honestly you're not even gonna bother looking at this but I genuinely hope your house burns down with your computer and everything else that belongs to you

Like I'm about to figure out how to track you down so I can kill you myself at this point because you're so fucking annoying

Anyway THIS IS A SCAM, the is the SECOND account with this exact sob story, it's only a couple days old and the only post is their parasite bullshit. Stop fucking believing these asks, stop fucking reblogginf these people and treating them like their real

Normal real human beings who need aid ain't meticulously sending asks to people THEY DO NOT KNOW for help

If they were real and actually needed help they would have followers to reblog their shit. They wouldn't just suddenly make a new blog with NO CONNECTIONS and start begging like the world's saddest door to door salesman

Like literally I am BEGGING people to fucking reblog scam warnings cause HUNDREDS of people are still falling for this shit and honestly if you're following me: WHY ARE YOU NOT WARNING YOUR OWN FOLLOWERS TOO???

Like I'm not trying to tell you what to put on your fucking blocs but maybe we'd have less people falling for this shit if I dunno someone could make ONE fucking scam warning post viral

Like I've made one, several people have made one and everyone looks at them and goes "oh yeah no I don't need to share that that's not important clearly everyone is smart enough to not fall for this" like just fucking share it, maybe finally we can get enough people to just start reflex blocking these kinds of asks that they give up but whatever I guess

Like literally go to their pinned post and look in the notes. I can't fucking DM every person saying this is a scam I've already been shadow banned ONCE for that

Y'all will bitch day and night about porn bots flooding tags but guys, I GET THESE EVERY DAY. ONCE EVERY DAY OR TWO DAYS LIKE CLOCKWORK I GET ONE OF THESE

At this point I'm about to just stop warning people about scammers cause like early no one else sees a problem with people pretending to be DYING to steal money from people who probably don't have that much to give or have actual real medical problems

[cistematicchaos]

ID: text reading: “this is my issue w serano-esque criticisms of transunity. “transphobes dont hate trans women because theyre men they see them an underclass of women to abuse” are you telling me transphobes dont see trans women as men? all that misgendering is just posturing?”

Believe it or not, the post this quote comes from was about misgendering and then spun off into weird-ass transmisogynistic shit, mostly revolving “transunity”, but I saw this part here and I wanted to say something about it so sorry y’all, I’m bringing it over here. 

The usage of serano-esque and an almost quote of hers literally entrances me. I say almost quote because OP explicitly edited out the fact the quote is about transmisogyny, not transphobia. Which is an important distinction because if you know anything about transmisogyny, you’ll know transmisogynists and transphobes are two totally different classes of bigots.

Without the distinction? The quote is just inaccurate and useless. And the idea you can connect transunity, some kind of watered-down-fucked-up idea of transmisogyny, and misgendering together like that is like trying to stick a rock to the table using canola oil and glitter glue. Which is to say, absurd and generally wild as fuck. 

(That’s probably why the further the post goes, the wilder it gets tbh.)

It’s just. I know it’s not wildly appreciated when I make posts about transmisogyny but I think it’s absolutely fucking absurd posts like that can get tons of notes with next to no issue when OP and others are blatantly using transmisogynistic language and condescending to any trans women/fems who point it out and no one really seems to give a fuck. Like y'all wonder why a lot of TMA folks and even just anti-transmisogyny folks in general don't trust "transunity" fuckers? This is just one example in a list a mile long of shit that slides by in these crowds that's blatantly transmisogynistic but no one's allowed to say anything about it, even though it's complete bullshit and usually doesn't even make a coherent point.

So many of you have this idea that because you pride yourselves on not "policing" each others language, that you've somehow eliminated hierarchy and the oppression we need to fight within our community. That you can just "unite" and we can fight our oppressors instead but it doesn't work like that and all you wind up doing is acting like bigoted jackasses trying to mask it with progressive language. So actually fucking think before reblogging this type of shit and work on your transmisogyny for fucks sake, thank you.

[lost-technology]

Found another person blocking my blog, but this time I know why. I tried to dry-reblog some thoughtful commentary from them as an experiment, not knowing if they knew or cared about this blog connected to my wider Internet name, but apparently they do. You see, (name un-disclosed) was a person I knew in the old guard fandom about 20 years ago and had a lot of fighting with. It was basically a situation where a toxic former friend drew me into fighting with this entire group of friends and my stupid shenanigans landed me on Fandom Wank, where this person was among one of the main posters. (Hypocritical cyberbulling place if you ask me, but whatever). It confirms that they remember me and aren't willing to forgive. It's okay. It's not like I wanted friendship with them, I just thought they had an insightful post and was just curious. I mean, I actually had found out their tumblr handle from seeing them around Ao3 again (resurrected fan), but hadn't looked it up and didn't block it. The fact that they preemptively blocked me - went through that trouble tells me all I need to know about held grudges and now they are blocked from my main just for the sake of me not seeing their posts and forgetting / accidentally trying to reblog them. (Nothing personal, just respecting their apparent want of no contact and the works of managing main blogs and side blogs on this site). I feel kind of sad because we won't know how each other have changed. I have quite a bit. I have grown away from Church and have divested myself of past bigotries, for instance. I'll never be able to mea culpa enough for that shit , but I don't think anyone really wants me to - just press on and press forward and don't make a big deal of it. I have gotten a lot of help psychiatrically. I'll always be as bipolar as fuck, that's just my brain, but at least it's managed now, but I understand why people would want to shy away from that, especially if they were former Internet contacts who got the brunt of my moodswings and mayhem before knowledge of the condition and treatment. (I can still be pretty bad now, actually, but I was worse 20 years ago). I don't know. I guess I'm a bit sad because I saw "Oh, person from my past, I wonder what and how they're doing now - hopefully they've had a good life. Hopefully they've had as many positives as I have or more." And of course, there was that hope that they'd forget me entirely because The Bullshit happened 20 years ago and people on the Internet rarely have long memories. There is exactly one person from my Trigun Fandom Past that I would be likely to block on sight if I saw them again, but maybe... not even then. I'd look them over and if I felt like I still couldn't trust contact with them again in any way, perhaps I'd give them an explanation of the mistrust, and it being entirely on my end (not a judgement on the person they've become). I think that will happen now, should That Person ever find me. I guess I can think of it as kind of being like my relationship with my older brother. Growing up there was stuff I don't want to even talk about going on between him and I in terms of him being unstable and abusive. Granted, he and I share a disorder, but it was never an excuse - and yet, last Spring, I got to go back across the country and visit my family. In visiting him in particular, I dragged a cousin along as a "buffer," even though everyone was telling me that he'd mellowed out over the years. Indeed, I saw him and I'm glad I did, because... he has. He has, over the last 20 some odd years become more introspective, reflective and he apologised to me for his past treatment of me. I took it as sincere. He just had a manner to him of This Guy Has Mellowed Out and Made Change. It was nice to see. Running into Ghosts of Fandom Past kind of made me think of that. If we ever did talk to each other, putting aside the past, how much change in each other would we see? I want to know how life's been treating you.

[sweetrays]

About me: 

Just call me by my username I don't like using real names anymore

(bisexual transsexual male & 2 yrs on T) 

I write novels, short stories, and fanfiction

I draw novel illustrations and favorite characters

I'm autistic and therefore can be perceived  a little bit strange 

My dominant special interest fandom wise is Peter Pan stories. (Hook is my absolute favourite Peter Pan movie. You'll mostly see me talking about the character Rufio) 

I liked OUAT Peter Pan for a little while last year but it's not my thing anymore 

My other special interest is historical (mostly 19th century) fashion

A quick heads up:

I enjoy NSFW art, but I don't post any. There might be some reblogging of that here occasionally. 

A lot of the fanfictions I post are openly based off- have some sort of connection to my somewhat disturbing fetishes that involve characters dying or being hurt

I know some might not be comfortable with that.

If you'd like to be my friend please just skim through the readmore just in case you find my opinions distasteful. If you do, just block me I don't want trouble

My Internet Discourse Opinions

Stupid but very important in order to avoid ugly confrontations nowadays 🙁

"Proshipping" 

-the good pure holy shipping vs. icky yucky nasty evil creepy freak shipping stuff is bullshit. If you give me/a mutual shit over FICTIONAL ship your ass is getting blocked cause that's just a whole nother level of ridiculous. I do not condone the bullying and harassment that is so common in 'woke' fandom culture nowadays. It is disgusting that people are throwing around paraphilic accusations and words like p**o at innocent fanfiction authors who are just enjoying characters with no real malicious intentions. 

I come across ships on ao3 that absolutely disgust me on a day to day basis, even so, the last thing I'd want to do is be mean to the author/anyone who enjoyed that ship. That's because the author has just as much a right to write about just as I have the right to be uncomfortable. No character ship is illegal and people are allowed to be as gross or weird as they like as long as it remains fictional (which in 99.99% of cases no one is actively trying to encourage and/or normalising pairing that would be illegal irl) That's never how fandom, art, or fiction has ever worked. If you think otherwise, all I'm saying is you have some serious issues and you need help. 

When I write an age gap pairing I don't parade my fic around going "EVERYBODY START DATING YOUR FATHER!!" I tag with many warnings to avoid upsetting people who would be opposed to reading it + add a disclaimer explaining how I do not support such things in real life situations because I don't and neither does anyone else who ships 'problematic' things. 

Transgender discourse (neopronouns, etc) 

As a transgender male myself, I don't care what pronouns someone uses or what gender they claim to be. I am pro-block anti-harassment when I see someone I disagree with. 

However, I do block quite liberally when I see people saying that transgenderism is possible without dysphoria. Because it is not. Being trans is not a choice. Dysphoria is the cause of being trans. Even if it's just a tiny bit of dysphoria you are still valid. If you're a feminine presenting trans male, that is fine, if you're a masculine presenting trans female, that's fine too because even if you're trans you absolutely do not have to abide by society's confining gender stereotypes. 

But, if you are feminine presenting non-dysphoric afab going by he/him or a masculine presenting non-dysphoric amab going by she/her. That is not transgender. You just picked different pronouns. Which again, I don't care about the pronouns thing so whatever, but just please don't call that transgender because my brother in Christ, we are not the same. 

Therefore please leave me alone if: 

You have some sort of weirdly obsessive morality/legality bias against people minding their own business with character shipping in fandom

OR

Think that being trans is a choice. 

Thats all, have a nice day. Don't forget to block if you don't like me lol.

[silent-lily]

i saw your reblog! GOOD LUCK PLAYING OMORI MAN !!!! hope you have fun!!! i know we haven't interacted all that much but still, as a mutual, don't hesitate to scream at me about this game if you ever feel the need to do so! also beware of spoilers! this game will indeed fuck you up but don't we all love to be fucked up by a particularly good storyline sometimes !!!!

also if i may ask, what's your favorite silent hill game? and should they be played in their particular order, or is it ok to just pick any part of the series and enjoy the ride from there? i remember watching a silent hill 3 stream a while ago and absolutely loving that game, never played the others though; i would love to get deeper into the series and that's why i decided to ask you about that :P

HEYYYYY!!!! Thank you, I don't know how far I am in the game but I am certainly having fun! RPG Maker games have always been one of my faves, so Omori just took its rightful place amongst the other well-known gems :) I usually just scroll through Tumblr, reblogging stuff /w comments in the tags but if the need arises - I will gladly scream at you haha. I love love LOVE games that may fuck you up a bit (or not a bit) - psychological horror is one of my faves.

Okay, now THAT is a question I love to hear, as well as the second one. Long-long talk ahead, so I'll put it under the cut for convenience.

My faves are the games that are considered "Classic Silent Hill quadrilogy". Yes, all of the four - even though, if I'm perfectly honest, SH1 and SH3 are THE Faves actually, mostly because of the "Fucked Up Cultist Bullshit" parts of the series and the familial connection of the protags (in SH1 we play as the father, in SH3 we play as his grown-up daughter) who I love dearly. Also Alessa, the one who brought The Fog World and The Otherworld to life.

Many people consider Silent Hill 2 a good part to get into the series (as in to see what the series is all about, its main themes and its "psychological horror" style), and I agree! BUT - if you want to know the actual origins of all fucked-up stuff of that small town you better go with the first part, Silent Hill (1999) (or even another part about which I'll talk in a bit). There's no actual PC version of it out there but there are hacked PSOne versions which can be easily emulated.

Now, SH1 and SH3 are directly connected via story and characters, SH2 and SH4 are mostly standalones BUT connected together via some plot details. So I advise to follow this order of playing because it goes along with the canonical chronology of events:

Silent Hill 1 -> Silent Hill 3 -> Silent Hill 2 -> Silent Hill 4: The Room

(also for the love of everything DO NOT PLAY THE HD COLLECTION VERSIONS OF SH2-3; they're horrible and glitchy as PC ports and the voice acting was changed and it's WORSE than the original; look for Enhanced Editions)

All games that came after these four are considered of, well, lower quality and not as well-thought through. Which is true BUT: - Silent Hill Origins may also be good to look into because it's a prequel to the first game but better to just watch a playthrough in my opinion before going to the first part (I had too much of a hard time emulating it and... eeeehhh I didn't really like the gameplay even if it tried to be like in the "classic" ones); - Silent Hill Homecoming can be looked into as well even though it's the most hated one of all the Silent Hill games, story-wise and gameplay-wise. For me, I actually found some interesting details in it that I liked (again, mainly The Fucked-up Cultist Bullshit) so I don't hate it as much as any other SH fan. Again, though, better just watch the playthrough - the game, even if it has a port for PCs, is awfully broken and HARD to play by yourself.

There are also in the Main Series: Silent Hill Shattered Memories (a reimagining of the first game minus The Cult Stuff) which is... not that important to everything in the Main Storyline, it's basically an AU; and Silent Hill Downpour that can look kinda plain and boring after everything else because it copies plenty of the tropes that were in the previous games. They may be ignored (but in the end it's up to you of course - you may look into them as well).

So yeah, here we go! The games can be divided into two types basically (with SH Shattered Memories as an outsider):

Shit happens because of The Local Cult, involving innocent bystanders (chronologically - SH Origins -> SH1 -> SH3 -> SH4 The Room -> SH Homecoming);

Shit happens because people with heavy burden get trapped in their own nightmares and inner demons brought to life (SH2 and SH Downpour).

Tl;dr What's the best order to PLAY: SH1 (emulated on ePSXe) -> SH3 (Enhanced Edition) -> SH2 (Enhanced Edition) -> SH4 The Room (Enhanced Edition or GOG Ver.)

What's the best order to WATCH AS A PLAYTHROUGH for the story: SH Origins -> SH1 -> SH3 -> SH2 as a small breaker but it's needed -> SH4 The Room -> SH Homecoming

That's all! Oof sorry for THAT many words but... yeah Silent Hill series has been my love and passion for 15+ years so I LOVE to share things about it! Feel free to ask more stuff too! :)

(it would certainly be more noticeable how much inspiration was drawn from these games into creating Omniphobia after watching through all of them haha)

[vtori73]

Hmmm... probably shouldn't try writing this right now while lacking a decent amount of sleep BUT I can no longer escape complaining about it so I'm just going to DO IT...

Anyway, so, I keep seeing posts by people sharing counter arguments to posts complaining about people not reblogging their work and just... I'm not sorry to say this but none of these counters i've read so far make any sort of good arguments and kind of just prove the point that a lot of us artists/creators are already very aware of and that is that a LOT of y'all feel entitlement to our creations (regardless of if ur an artist or not).

Don't get the connection? I'll try to explain. Let start with breaking down some of these counter arguments I've seen. The flimsiest one being accusing people of 'guilt tripping' & yes I do think it's flimsy argument/accusation. For one, the artist is NOT literally forcing you to do anything you don't have to ACTUALLY share anything but for the artist it means a lot and could lead to them making actual money that they NEED but can't get elsewhere because we live in a capitalist society. If it bothers you, guess what, you can UNFOLLOW them (it's free) and artists shouldn't be made out to be the villains because they are being honest that the shares/engagement are just THAT important for them (unless they are literally harassing u but that's diff, let's all acknowledge that a diff thing... good? Good!). I don't really see it all that different from panhandling, sure you might find some artists who aren't actually poor poor BUT I would hope most of us are aware of by now that only a very very small percentage of artists are actually living lavishly and at most are making decent enough for what they do. Also, I know we all LOVE to complain about this age of influencers and how things have to involve engagement, likes, etc but for fucks sakes don't be dicks and forget SOME people DO need that bullshit because they can't get their shit out there otherwise & if their shit isn't out there they can't make money, and we need money to fucking live in this nightmare world!!!! You could also just BUY from the artist instead because you know what's even BETTER then online bullshit? ACTUAL FINANCIAL COMPENSATION!!! 'oh but I don't have money, I'm poor too, I can't right now, I would rather give to someone I know who REALLY needs it, etc" all valid responses (that you should keep to yourselves because we don't need to know ur business) BUT you can't have ur goddamn fucking cake and eat to, if you can't support us financially THATS why/when we ask for reblogs/reshares, etc because guess what?... Yeah, you guessed it, it's FREE to do that shit, sure likes are... SOMETHING I won't argue they aren't BUT at the end of the day it doesn't get the artists work to others, it doesn't help spread their artwork to others who might actually be able to pay/hire the artists for their skills.

... okay, so yeah I hope that all makes sense, if not... oh well this is as coherent as sleep deprived me can be. Moving on, I'm going to tackle the next argument which is "likes are engagement too, they mean something TOO ME!!!🥺🥺🥺" ...Ugh 🤮🤢🤮 yeah, this argument is... also bad. Why? Well for one it makes it about someone else, just because YOU are okay with only likes doesn't mean everyone else is especially since not everyone needs the same amount of engagement/support as others since some or even plenty of y'all arent ONLY making income from ur creations/art and have other venues of support unlike some other artists who rely on their art to bring in money. &, I KNOW we are all aware that's not how social media works, social media doesn't put much worth into just likes which is what most artists mean when they complain. They aren't LITERALLY saying your likes mean nothing to them and that you might as well have just spat on them & their work you FUCKERS but I feel like we should all be aware that's what these artists meant, right? Right? Well, y'all should if y'all pay any attention to social media/artists (and please, PLEASE don't try to lie and say yall don't because I know that's bullshit with how much commentary & criticism I see on this & that regarding social media & the claws it has in all of us and our passions/livelihoods etc whatever).

I... think I had another counter argument to a counter argument but I honestly don't recall either so for now I'm just going to wrap up this horrible post. So... you all like to go on & ON about supporting artists, about supporting individuals and not corporations, about supporting indie titles TRUE indie work... and yet... And yet, when these artists & creators go on to complain about no one reblogging/retweeting/sharing, etc their work that they have worked very long & hard for that they are trying to use to stay afloat in our capitalist society y'all are quick to go 'oh y'all are so mean to guilt trip us & this artists who clearly doesn't need engagement for xyz reasons says they appreciate just likes so why should we!!!" I've already known this for awhile, and it's not a hard pill to swallow either, it's just a fact of life that people don't actually want to support artists, it has to be easy, or quick or something, it has to be in the way y'all want to support us, otherwise y'all won't bother and instead of leaving it at that y'all dare to COMPLAIN about US, and it's... its entitlement, pure entitlement to us, to our creations and I just wish yall could acknowledge that, just... be honest with yourselves, with us... please.

Anyway yeah... this was directed at specific posts I saw, and maybe I'm being harsh but I'm just tired... so so tired & not just because I'm lacking sleep but also I'm just so tired as an artists and dealing with seeing day in and day out of basically almost NO ONE caring at all about us or our work. I'm just so tired of all of y'all and maybe next time instead of complaining about x mainstream media thing maybe just... go partake in it instead? I mean, at least those creators/artists were already compensated & don't actually really need y'all's shares, follows, etc, all y'all got to do it consume the media, which is what y'all actually wanted... right?

[eyesofbluebitch]

Hi i read your reblog to my post and yeah...Seto is kinda mischaracterized by the fandom (that's partly anime fault, especially the 4kids version). His characters is meant to be a ~ very ~ realistically representation of someone with clear PTSD do to an extremely shitty childhood. It is pretty clear that he uses Duel Monsters as a ways of escapism and to communicate with people, while for his relationship with Atem...i personally don't see it as romantic, i mean KT himself during an interview that Kaiba uses Atem as a trauma projection filler to take on the role of Gozaburo (the enemy to defeat) and that's extremely unhealthy.

So yeah... Seto is a good person AT HEART who is also very fucked up because of traumas...when he will go to therapy i will know peace ✌🏻

Hi. Thanks for the ask. I’ll be answering this with my own personal thoughts and opinions being a hardcore Seto stan and long term Seto writer. I reblogged that post because I write Seto very realistically with the actual meanness that puts most people off of him because it’s who he is. With the added corruption and snobbery of being filthy rich. Doing things that a rich figurehead in the real world would do that I absolutely can see Seto doing. Down to mafia elements and drug usage, I myself have gotten a extreme amount of criticism for how mean my Seto portrayal is as well as other themes. I feel he has always been misunderstood and mis-characterized by not only the fandom but his peers in the series as well. I write him with several mental disorders including PTSD. Down to him being an absolute control freak because it’s the only way he doesn’t feel chaotically not in control of his own life and destiny, down to being an immaculately clean person to near obsession levels of tidiness and order. His views on love and affection completely warped and skewed after growing up being abused and neglected showing him that was the norm outside of Mokuba and him and even they had issues now and then. Duel Monsters is most certainly his escape from all of the bullshit swimming in his head and his demanding job as CEO.

As far as romance is concerned in my view of him I can see him well aware he is drop dead gorgeous and I could see him partaking in casual sex to try to unload all of his trauma and use it as escapism. Which is why he is more or less a bachelor in my writing at the baseline. Letting himself love someone though would be extremely difficult and when presented is not without several drunken melt downs trying to analyze every single molecule of how such a situation arose. While they started off that way, him and Atem, he a object for Seto to take down, I feel DSoD changed that. Again it’s my personal view and what I got from the movie but I view DSoD as his personal love letter to Atem despite him being aware of what drives him to chase the man down. I don’t see him risking his life for just a platonic duel personally. He might not know something more is there until it slaps him in his face at point blank range but that’s how I write him as a Prideshipper.

It’s often the norm that people don’t understand trauma and abuse when it comes to turning someone into a harsh and jaded person, especially growing up with no parental figures and the one you think as a child you can trust only turn out to make you worse, that’s something that happened in my own life which is why writing Seto is more or less home for me. We connect in a lot of ways. As far as therapy is concerned I don’t see him going to therapy, at least not my portrayal because he is clammed up so tight that he would never let his walls down to talk to some random therapist. Instead I believe the therapy and escapism he needs he gets out of dueling Atem. Which is why he needs it so badly. He needs to feel alive and feel his blood rushing through his veins in the heat of battle. Letting him that small window in time to forget all the poison that lives in his mind on a daily basis. It is unfortunate that most people see the shit talking asshole portion of him on the surface and as expected want nothing to do with digging deeper because it’s actually work. It isn’t easy. He isn’t easy and people want something that is easy, which is why very few will ever get to see his softer side. But at the end of the day he’s just this big broken guy that wants what anyone wants in the world  —  to be understood and loved. Though he has all but given up on the idea of anyone doing more than betraying him so his walls only continue to solidify as time goes on. Though by post DSoD he does show character development in being willing to join Yuugi on the battle field and offer him a smile at the end of Diva’s defeat. So I hold hope that as things progress his relationships with certain individuals such as Yuugi will improve over time. It just takes him a extremely slow time to get there. Thanks for the ask though. Always willing to discuss my boy.

[lovecolibri]

SaL anon here friend thinking I'll join in on the speculations about the latest episode. So I read the post you rebloged about Buck mirroring the feelings of those around him as a way to avoid his own/feel accepted around them, and thought about how this episode was originally supposed to air 5x08 an episode where an actual mirror led to so much confusion and angst for Eddie and it was only when he realized it was a reflection that the kids were saved, and how Buck was upset he hadn't realized.

Hi bestie! You're posting theory once again proves true, for the most part, though in my defense, I'm also at the whim of the gif makers and while this episode was delightful in every other aspect but the b*ckt*ylor one, the last 10-15 minutes really drug the whole episode down (but also provided some...inch resting insights) leading to the wall of text posts I'm sure you saw (with a healthy mix of petty memes because of course). Anyway, I'm trying to figure out if once they break up, I'll be able to watch this episode again and fully enjoy it knowing I don't have to suffer through them being a couple for much longer but honestly I just so deeply dislike her character that sitting through her "sob story" again feels impossible. Like, I have zero trouble sitting through scenes with any of the other love interests for the rest of the firefam, even a*a's scenes (though I might still cringe) and still enjoy the episode but I'm not sure I can do it with Tay Kay because she has been pushed so in our faces and she is just so deeply unlikable as a character for me (sound familier? 🙃🙃🙃). And it's such a shame because the rest of this episode? Solid. Gold. Absolutely back on the normal 911 bullshit we all know and love. Insane calls? Family drama? Absolutely hilarious scenes that literally had me in tears? Adorable couple moments? It was all SO GOOD so I'm hoping some time and space and the eventual break up will soften the automatic "NOPE! HARD PASS!" reaction I have when I see her face, but we'll see. 🤷‍♀️

Okay, so as much as the last part of that episode was painful to watch (and not in the "good angst" kind of way like this show is so good at (lookin at you fight or flight, tsunami arc, etc), but more in the cringe, "sexy math" scene kind of way), it's also got me DEEP in my Evan Buckley feels because there is SO much going on here. With his actions born out of a knee-jerk trauma response to being "abandoned", with him shoving down his feelings so he's not being "needy" or making it about him, with him only getting a "love" acknowledgement for things he did and not for who he actually is as a person, with the choices Oliver is making with his face and the lack of eye contact and the body language and everything. It's all just so much in this episode, especially given the awkwardness we've seen from them all season.

And that mirror parallel to Defend In Place sure is something! The way we could have gotten the direct follow up to Tay Kay's story from 5x07 and then had an episode where she wasn't even brought up? But Eddie looks on the verge of a breakdown? Eddie realizing him and Buck had been, totally on accident, given bad information on the direction they should be heading and it took looking into a mirror to figure out the right way to go? The way Eddie lit up like a Christmas tree when he figured it out, but Buck was standing there still confused? The way Buck needs to look into the mirror of his relationship with Abby and see the parallels to his current relationship, but while Eddie has had his epiphany, Buck is still confused and hasn't made the connection yet? Like???? I'm absolutely feral about all this actually?

Because just like with Abby, Buck's putting in all the work and making the gestures, but this time he's not doing it out of love but because it's what he's "supposed" to do so it all looks (and feels) so hollow. Buck respected Abby first (definitely not something he will ever be able to say about Miss Girlboss) and genuinely enjoyed talking to her and then started a relationship. He asked Bobby what to do to keep the relationship working because she was drowning and he's Mr. Fix-It but he couldn't fix her mom being sick and eventually dying. And Bobby's advice was good and Buck did all the things out of genuine love and respect, however (it's especially clear on the re-watch), he and Abby had fundamentally different ideas of what their relationship was and what they wanted out of it and that's why she left thinking he would move on after a short time and forget all about her. And now, Buck is following the same pattern of getting into the mess because that's what Bobby said to do and it worked with Abby until her struggle was gone/took a new shape, and it worked with repairing his relationship with Maddie and building his relationship with Eddie, and being there and being a good friend to the rest of the firefam. But the thing is, it's not because he loves her that he's trying to help or be there as support for things he can't fix. It's because that's what you're supposed to do. It's a checkbox on a list of How To Keep People From Leaving You (Kind Of) and when it's backed by sincere love it's an act of service, it's a fulfilling part of the relationship but when it's not? When it's just a Thing You Do To Not Get Left? It's draining. And good god Buck looks drained this season. He is once again trying so hard and getting nothing that he actually needs back. And when he realizes he's fallen back into old bad habits, what becomes of his relationship then?

Anywhoodles, it's is very late and this is very long and rambling and may no longer make as much since as it did when I was thinking it in my head so I'm going to shut up now. *i just have a lot of feelings gif* but I'm just going to say that I am very interested to see what Monday night has in store for us for this winter finale. They are usually more on the wholesome side and wrapping up open plotlines but with as different (derogatory) as this season has been, who knows what we're going to get!

(also, whatever you do, do NOT think about masking and hiding true feelings and Michael Guerin (season 2 especially) because it WILL ruin your day and have you in tears. Just let these traumatized, curly headed men desperately grasping at any scrap of something that could possibly be "love" thrown their way, realize they are already so deeply loved by dark haired, sarcastic/sassy former military men who others might think are "closed off" but are actually giant marshmallows, and are a little overly cautious with technology/personal security, but on opposite ends of the tech-savvy spectrum.)

[mrs-nate-humphrey]

I am curious: what are your favorite scenes from your main ships (date, dair, derena...)?

scenes involving milo don't count, sorry!

for me, it's really not just scenes, but body language & just in general, how they are with each other, you know? dan and serena grin at each other and hug SO much, you can tell that being around each other in s1 made them both so happy, and even after that glow fades the way they look for comfort in each other... top level stuff. the way blair looks at dan... we never see her as radiant at any other point. she was not looking at anyone else like this. and gosh, dan and nate. they're both so comfortable around each other that there's absolutely nothing weird about like. discussing that one ex girlfriend whom they both share AND both were in love with. there is literally no other duo who trusts/enjoys each other's company so much that they're comfortable in a love triangle. (probably because they're more in love with each other than with the girl, but that is not the point. or is it?)

anyway, more specific answers. under the cut. this is one of the longest answers i've ever written on this blog possibly but you KNEW that would happen when you sent this ask, didn't you? (affectionate)

derena: i tagged one of my ds reblogs as 'the grumpy one is soft for the sunshine one' and like. look at them! this hug from 1x10 kills me in the best way. they are both the literal embodiment of :D when they see each other! i love 1x10 as a whole moment, their entire thing at cotillion is so sweet and they're both so happy. the fact that he is talking about his chemistry teacher during this kiss in 1x07. that bit at the end of 1x05 when they talk about their siblings (being there for their sibling because of fallible parents being a derena parallel makes me simultaneously really sad and really soft, tbh). 1x05 gives me SO MUCH SECONDHAND EMBARRASSMENT but the way they walk off together arms around each other does something to me - these are two people who are still getting to know each other but who really like what they see, and who trust each other and. are just having a good time together! back when derena was my OTP, the 1x11 "your story's about me?" was absolutely a fave, too, and i still adore it, albeit in a different, more nostalgic way. i like a dan who writes cute stories about serena. no empty shell sabrina van skoneker bullshit. she is so much like you, daniel! you'd be shattered if she did this to you. don't do this to her. tbh, most derena moments from s1 are just A+ romance. the bit in 2x02 in the jitney is so funny, they're SO bad at being exes. the bit in... 3x03 i think?? i don't remember... on the contrary. when they're talking about dan's fling w/ georgina and serena's relationship with carter, the ease with which they talk and how happy/supportive they are of each other's new relationships... yeah. love to see it.

i also really like any instance of them having honest/open conversations. 1x13, talking about how serena is concerned about blair. 1x08, serena talking to dan about feeling jealous of vanessa. this bit from the touch of eva or whatever that episode is. 4x04 i think. this is the conversation everyone is trying to get dan to have and he's avoiding EVERYONE else. derena interactions in 3x21 (can't find a gif right now) - the fact that dan is with serena when her dad abandons them, the fact that he goes all the way there with her. 2x07, "i'm really glad you're nate's friend. he really needs someone like you right now" (though i'm cheating, that's technically a d/n moment too klhdflkgf). there's a bit in s4 where he's advising her against having an affair w/ colin, i don't remember the ep number, but the way he takes her side so easily and naturally and puts due blame/responsibility solely on her professor... yeah. 4x10 i think this ep is?? idk. but like my tags say, im sentimental about this moment because while what dan was doing was irresponsible, sneaking her out of the ostroff, he was the only person in this episode who was actually talking to her and listening to her and taking her seriously. nobody else was doing that!!

i probably have more moments i'm not remembering, but we're only 1/3 into this answer and LOOK AT THE WORDS, good lord, i'm sorry.

dair: my favourite dair episode is hands down despicable b (5x21) which i have heard is an uncommon answer. i just love the conflict resolution of it all, okay!!! 1x04 & 2x08 are like. standard answers any dair shipper will give, and i'm no different. i love dan being able to give blair advice and blair actually taking his advice even though they're not friends yet!!! be right back, yelling at the intimacy of it all!! 5x16, with their getting together (this little kiss and dan being so startled by it), blair admitting a flaw she genuinely does have and dan saying it's not awful because it's her, which is just. romance at its finest. those vows, good lord. 5x18.... they're having fun! blair showing up at the loft in lingerie for dan... the delight on her face.... (i know this moment blows up in their face but when she's there she looks so happy and proud of herself and this was like THE moment when i was like. oh. dair is really the heart of this garbage show huh).

i think for me, the thing that really sells dan & blair together is the serena of it all. both of them love serena more fiercely than anyone else, and that is what brings them together. (fwiw i definitely think nate loved serena this much and this deeply, too; the writers just wanted to pop the serenate balloon, which even i think was extremely unnecessary and ooc.) but (& i have so much meta about this) their relationship grows beyond serena. their entire s4 arc is SO good. i love how comfortable around each other they are, in such an adult way, in the sense of like. they both bring so much stability to each other? morgan tagged this edit "the marrieds" and like. yeah. b offers to help him shave. they're having breakfast & reading the paper together.

all the love declarations we got that weren't a simple 'i love you.' be your charming wonderful self (how could she not love you/ tell me what would make you happy, dan) i told chuck he doesn't have my heart anymore (you spent your life earning the keys to set you free when you were free all along!!!!) dan's pep talk to blair in 5x21 (already linked a gifset earlier, here's another one if you want i guess). there's definitely more... but honestly, the way the dair arc was executed was so good - while i do have my complaints, i also think keeping those aside, it was SO close to perfect. i love dan & blair's banter and gradually becoming closer and closer and closer. it felt very organic and real and GOSH. the way penn & leighton looked at each other while playing dan and blair...... it's just SO MUCH.

date: this is the hardest, because it's. *screams*. maybe you saw me losing my mind over those 2 seconds of nate handing dan a waffle? i love almost every scene with these two, even the hellish s6 breakup scene. my favourite episode for d/n (& also favourite gg episode in general) is 2x06 - i love the homoerotic subtext of it all. nate pretending to be dan because dan's name is the first name that came to his head. dan flirting w/ nate while tied to that thing, in his underwear. them becoming friends. and 2x07 as a follow-up to that! dan getting nate to live in the loft with the humphreys for a while. i am so soft.

4x09 is a terrible episode in general, especially for serena my beloved, but the d/n moments in that one? off the CHARTS. this weird overly macho flirting, in some ways THE most iconic d/n line. this entire finish each other's sentences nonsense. someone (i think it was ana but im not sure?) compared the energy of those scenes i just linked to the book blairenate love triangle resolution, blairena choosing each other over nate in the books, date choosing each other over serena in the show (if only! RIP.) after the saints & sinners ball, this cute little moment of 'youre the only one who understands me. please tell me they went home together. i mean. how could they not have.

3x07, them watching vampire porn together. a tag i used on ao3 (& also on here, once) is 'nate brings out the himbo in dan'. here is a prime example. 'is she levitating?' i don't fucking know, dan, what do you think?? (i was telling my partner that that's what i love abt dair vs date. around blair dan is an intellectual, a librarian, an art historian, a museum curator. around nate it's like dan is competing to be #1 himbo on the show. can my girlfriend actually fly? i don't know, dan. i can't believe you're seriously asking such a question.)

3x12 pep talk. (sorry about the shitty quality!) essentially nate telling dan that he (dan) is hot and that he shouldn't talk himself down so much.

dan making nate gay in his book. you know. his book from which blair found out he was in love with her. nads (who i will not tag in this billion word long gushy meta, because i value her sanity) once called inside "wish fulfilment' and. i mean. yeah

nate checking dan out at the derena wedding continues to be hilarious. hilarious in the same way as dan sexually fantasising about nate. canon really went 'let's give ivy some special easter eggs' and i appreciate them a lot!

i love the way they are around each other - so quietly attuned to each other. i showed my sister my date!husbands gifset, and she was like. yeah they're so married. and it's just stuff like how dan looks for nate over his shoulder, it's not even an active action, it's as easy and natural and intuitive as breathing, checking to see if nate is still there.

oh, that wasn't as hard as it could've been! okay. cool. im SURE there's more things i could scream about, because it's DN, the fact that they're non-canon makes me THAT much fiercer about them than dair/derena, to be honest. so many dots to connect!! anyway.

[bomberqueen17]

No need to reply if you don't want to. I just wanted to express my support for boycotting censored fanwork exchanges. I guess I'm Old School and this is the first I've heard of content restrictions. Boggles my mind, that's what tags are for.

I didn’t even intend this to be a crusade or boycott or anything, I was just truly horrified and dismayed by the fact that there seems to be this new idea in fandom that heavy, subjective censorship is the default way to be inclusive.

Like, that’s the worst part-- the EBB people seem to genuinely think I and those who agree with me are on this weird crusade to force them to look at our trash. I’ve honestly had overwhelmingly positive responses but the occasional outliers are just frothing about the-- here’s the thing, I chose to summarize my fic to make it clear what kind of content I wanted to create, which I was fairly certain was what that exchange was actually looking for (I am not a darkfic or trashfic writer! No shade, that’s just not what I do), and the responses are like “ew her gross scat rape fic” and that is so clearly something they’re bringing with them to this, and I don’t know where they got it.

(Genuinely, I know some trashfic writers-- I’d fallen out of touch! 2020′s been dark! I don’t even read that stuff lately! but in these dark times we need to rekindle connections sometimes-- and I can’t think of a single one who’s into writing scat. It’s a weird, weird fixation, which does not originate within the trashfic community, I promise you.)

There is this wide, deep movement within our culture in general and fannish culture specifially that is wildly pro-censorship. It’s a kind of Purity Culture creep that’s startling, to those of us who’ve been here a while, and is just the latest wave of the Strikethrough bullshit. What’s stunning is how deeply mired within fannish spaces it has become; all kinds of people I’d blithely assumed were generally common-sensical are up in arms over this and are clearly not reacting to what’s actually been said, but what it’s said has been said, which--

I don’t even know who the mods of the EBB are? I don’t hang out on Discord servers generally and that seems to be where the younger set does its wheeling and dealing, though I’m not sure even of that. I only know what’s been publicly posted on Tumblr and even that, only what’s been reblogged into my sphere, so I have no idea who’s actually said what, but as far as I can tell, the drama is entirely that they feel attacked by this.

I’m not attacking anyone. I wrote that entire post inwardly-directed; I feel excluded, I am sad to be excluded, I am upset at this bizarre trend. I didn’t want to attack anyone, and I’m not even interested in drama.

But I definitely felt that if we can’t put our feet down against pointless self-censorship (don’t like don’t read is a phrase as old as fandom and if we lose that we lose ourselves) in an extremely adult-oriented fandom, then we’ve lost the beachhead entirely. 

Censorship is NOT normal. It is NOT normal and no, not everyone’s going to just “know what you mean” when you say “no dead dove”. (IIRC Dead Dove actually really just means “tagged thoroughly and accurately”, though my source on that is, you know, watching the meme develop, so maybe The Kids use it differently now, but I do feel like the original meaning’s kind of important.) No, appealing directly to the mods to review every story concept is not sustainable or fair or NORMAL it is NOT NORMAL. That is not how ANYTHING works. That is a new change. 

It’s a slippery slope, and I genuinely don’t want to hurt people’s feelings about it but oh my GOD no. This is an 18+ canon, and you cannot POSSIBLY run a general-interest event that you censor MORE STRICTLY THAN CANON and then have the absolute blind nerve to say this is “for inclusivity”.

[bloomsberries]

I posted 837 times in 2021

72 posts created (9%)

765 posts reblogged (91%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 10.6 posts.

I added 148 tags in 2021

#seen in 2021 - 58 posts

#wandavision spoilers - 15 posts

#the witcher - 14 posts

#dmm - 11 posts

#😍 - 11 posts

#wandavision - 9 posts

#black widow spoilers - 8 posts

#black widow - 8 posts

#shadow and bone - 7 posts

#yennefer of vengerberg - 7 posts

Longest Tag: 128 characters

#and i also think that having all of the ‘information’ in the world at your fingertips doesn’t necessarily make you more informed

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Here is a post to hold myself accountable:

I spend too much time doing meaningless nonsense on this phone. I am going to start writing my works in progress again and I am going to finish them. I will post a link here every SATURDAY until they are both done. RS first, then Bedlam. If you don’t see me doing this, feel free to call me out on my bullshit.

Thanks for your time lol.

34 notes • Posted 2021-07-25 22:49:54 GMT

#4

I used to do these lists back on LJ and I was reminded by ratherembarrassing’s recent weekly posts. I realized how much I like reading about other people’s experiences, what they’re into, how they’re feeling, what they’re up to—and i was also reminded about why I used to like doing it for myself, which was as a way to stay connected. I have disconnected myself from all but the most “essential” people in my life, and I haven’t found anything good in that isolation. I have to admit, once I stopped contributing to fandom (writing, having any meta opinions whatsoever), I kind of thought that no one would really want to read about my day/week. It’s easy to disconnect irl, especially in the middle of a pandemic, but it’s even easier to disconnect in online spaces.

Anyway, what I’ve been up to:

1. Watching Perry Mason in the evenings has been a soothing balm I hadn’t expected. It’s so predictable and yet enjoyable despite (because?) of its predictability.

2. I haven’t written anything since I got sick last month. I was on a tiny little roll, and now I’m back to not knowing how to string three words together.

3. I had a random Audible credit and picked up something called The High Five Habit? So far it sounds like so much hooey, but I do enjoy high-fiving myself in the mirror.

4. It’s October, which means we are in my favorite part of the year, finally. It is 95 degrees outside, but I can pretend we get to enjoy fall. TONIGHT I DECORATE.

23 notes • Posted 2021-10-01 21:13:12 GMT

#3

“Sphinx,” Rendezvous Series #77.

22 notes • Posted 2021-07-31 20:27:50 GMT

#2

things I've done with my freedom from my phone (I'm on day 4):

finally finished The Mars Room and Go Tell It on the Mountain (is there any writer who is able to match Baldwin's ability to construct a sentence, beautiful AND filled with pathos; if there is I don't know of them); am deep into How to Do Nothing; I'm going to start The Broken Earth trilogy next (it's time)

watched Ninotchka, The Desperate Hours, The Out-of-Towners (original)

have NO idea what is happening on Twitter; truly the greatest thing to have come from this whole endeavor

I've written in my journal Every Day

downloaded RS to my Kindle so that I can refer to it whenever I need to for writing purposes without going on the internet and possibly distracting myself (I'm bad); it is WEIRD seeing it there, among the real books

according to my phone, I am averaging 77% less screen time than last week

I hope you're all doing wonderfully

16 notes • Posted 2021-11-16 21:32:06 GMT

#1

Got the new TWSBI Swipe pen and I can safely say I will never go back to the mess that is piston filling fountain pens again. (Shh I know it’s not hard.) You mean I could have been using cartridges this whole time?

15 notes • Posted 2021-08-09 21:06:41 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[rpbetter]

what's the nicest possible way to tell a close friend their roleplay blogs suck and if they want followers and interaction like they keep complaining about they have to actually put effort into it instead of just making blog after blog and slapping a character on it like that's they need to do. I've tried to suggest this to her before by comparing other blogs that play her muse but she just feels inadequate instead of inspired to emulate them which I understand but it's very frustrating when I suggest a million ways to make her blog better and she brushes them all off for one reason or another and I don't want to say anything because she's like a sister to me. sigh.

Unfortunately, the short answer to this is that there really isn't any way you can make her see this unless she's ready to see it.

But, I don't like giving those sorts of answers, they feel hopeless and shitty, so, let's try this...

Understanding what the problem with your friend and her connecting with this information is, is important. It might help in talking to her about the issue.

What I find in these instances, and a lot of similar ones, is that the mun is unhappy about the results but quite happy with the process. She's enjoying some part of this, it's just not the lack of interaction, obviously. It's the very things she's doing to turn people off of her muses.

I think a lot of people get kind of addicted to new muses. I mean, the entire process of having a new muse:

interest to outright fixation, no matter how short-lived, in a new, inspiring muse

who is almost certainly in a new fandom, and probably, one that is very busy and popular at the moment

"someone stop me" phase, even though they've already decided

picking the perfect URL, creating the new blog, making the graphics and batches of icons

reblogging All The Content about the new muse, at least, the visual content and maybe, a couple of "oof, right in the feels" style short meta posts

plugging the new muse on the old blogs, through friends, etc.

mass follows

new mutuals! Shiny new meme asks in the inbox! New threads!

It's about the newness, the excitement, and the irrationally promising feeling that damn it, this time, the blog and muse is going to be successful, popular even, beloved, the actual favorite iteration of the character in the RPC. Like anything exciting, it's addicting for people. And like anything addicting, it can take hitting rock bottom and going several more feet down, a few times, before they're over it and want to change.

Which is, of course, where you come in with your as-yet failed RP interventions.

What makes what you're trying to do here very difficult is that there isn't a total bottoming out she's going to reach. There will always be something new and exciting coming out with a new and exciting muse that'll fix the problem, in her mind. There will always be the option and availability to create another blog, slap another muse on it, rinse and repeat. With shampoo and conditioner that never runs out.

You definitely had the right idea by trying to get her to contrast between why what she is doing isn't working the way she wants and why what someone else is doing is working out that way. It's just, as you found out, often not the best idea, no matter how well-intentioned it is. With her blogs constantly failing for reasons she refuses to believe, it's incredibly likely she's already done some comparison in all the wrong ways, ultimately going back and forth between blaming the other iterations, finding nothing but errors in the way they write the character and set up their blogs, and feeling depressed that she's not good enough, but they are.

So, you might have unintentionally inflamed all of this! She could be in a place where she's even more likely to believe that what she's doing is great as a defense mechanism for being hard on herself.

I'd also like to say that I'm aware the "right" advice here is, "there's nothing you can do, you'll just make her feel bad, people have a right to RP however they want." But, you're also her friend, and you have to be around the complaining and upset when this just keeps happening.

Furthermore, when we have very close friends like this, we automatically keep trying to fill in the gaps for them at cost to ourselves - every time they make another blog/muse, we get roped into writing things we know are just going to be dropped, making them things we know are going to left on a deserted blog, and so on. Eventually, it makes you feel bad about yourself because your efforts aren't good enough, either. It can really ruin the hobby for you, sucking away enjoyment and creativity you could be spending elsewhere.

I don't think you're wrong in trying to help both her and yourself.

Keep being honest with her. When she complains, be honest about why this is happening. And you can, indeed, be kind and honest!

Let's say that she says something about how she wrote all these opens and no one is going for them.

You could say something like, "that sucks. I liked this one, it's the one that feels and sounds like the character to me. What were you doing when you wrote that? You should rewrite the others to be a little more like that, I think people are looking for more of the character like we saw them in the series."

You're acknowledging that she's right, it does suck, it's a shitty feeling no matter how at fault for it she is. While pointing out something she did good (and, okay, maybe she didn't, maybe they all categorically sucked lol but find one that was even a tiny bit better/that has elements you can use to both boost her confidence and show her what is right, not just wrong). Then, giving her an idea - whatever she was thinking, watching, listening to at that time, she tapped into something more like the actual character, and she could do it again. And telling her what the problem is, at least with this, that people don't want a cardboard cutout muse, they want the one they like from the fandom book/show/movie.

No need to actually compare with another active mun and muse, or tell her that it's because what she's doing is terribly and driving you nuts. Even if both are true.

If she's the one that compares herself to another blog this time, seize the opportunity!

"Well, people like that the muse is developed and like the character they know. When you interact with another canon, don't you want them to be like the character you liked? You liked -current muse- for a reason. When I've felt like that, I reminded myself of why I was drawn to the character and worked harder on writing them accurately and getting their voice down. I think this other blog has done that and you haven't yet."

It's a little harsher, but she may very well only be looking for validation from you that this other blog actually sucks and she's doing great. A lot of complaints on tumblr are that - seeking validation, not help. The entire culture of that shit is not at all helpful. You don't want to try to sort of shock her out of it by being too harsh, but you do want to make it clear that you're not going to just give ass pats and tell her what she wants to hear.

You're telling her why this other blog is more successful, that the muse comes off as the character and is enjoyable to write with. Because the mun put in the effort to make them both accurate to the character and a muse that's fun/interesting/engaging to write with in RP.*

*Not all characters transfer over well to RP, either, and this might also be some of her problem. For whatever reason, some people are deeply drawn to the worst possible choices for them. They will find the least applicable character in a whole series, one with a billion characters that spans decades of material, plenty of viable options all around, but no, it's got to be this one. The one that's impossible for them to pull off, boring or disliked by the fandom, is incredibly difficult to interact with (think manic pixie bullshit, villains that are extreme loners, incredibly quiet and reserved characters, or those who are only ever seen in their canon to be bantering with friends and enemies - people they have established relationships with, unlike someone else's muse, even if that muse is a canonical friend or enemy), or is an active turn off in RP, like an outrageously overpowered character whose entire existence is based on being OP as fuck. That's going to be what they go for. Every. Damn. Time.

If you notice she's doing this, she could be compensating without even realizing it by turning the string of muses into identical and empty clichés she thinks people want to interact with, but that she can still handle writing. And unfortunately, your job is even harder, OP, because everyone has a character type...and your bestie's is Fucking Impossible to RP for 90% of the RPC Population Type lmao I'm...I'm so sorry.

Maybe if this is the case, you can get her to try out a different character that has some of the traits you've noticed she seems to always be drawn to, but without the complications. Work smarter, not harder, though! Propose this as you desperately wanting your muse to interact with x. Some people react very badly to being told "you'd write a great -muse name," others are flattered by it. If you don't know for certain that she'd be flattered, or at least not offended, that she doesn't hate this character or anything, do not say this. Just tell her that you love this character, you think she could handle them as a NPC in a thread, could she please try?

And make that the single most interesting thread in the history of threads. Specifically, for her. Give her tons of engagement with this NPC of the sort she tends to want the most. It might stick and reset some of her perspective on the types of characters she keeps choosing.

You're reminding her that she's a RPer, too, which sounds like a crazy thing to have to remind a RPer, but we do weirdly lose track of this. We get very invested in what we're putting out more than what we've successfully been given, especially when we're not being given much of what we want. So, you're prodding her to recall that there are two parts of this equation, she's been on the side of it - she's wanted to interact specifically with a canon muse because she loved the character/ship with hers/whatever, and has, as we all have, experienced both the disappointment of running through a ton of them who just are not that character and also finding the version that very much is.

This helps to put other people back into perspective in a way that isn't just "interactions." (Read as "desired attention." Which isn't a slam, it's true. It's also not a problem, we all are here to interact, we all enjoy having devoted mutuals and such. It's only a problem when we stop seeing them as anything other than a means to an end for ourselves.) She might be able to relate to them, thus, why they don't like her muses, if she can put herself back into their shoes.

You stick with that and transition it into why she picked the current muse. It's the same deal, there was something about the muse that sparked interest, creativity, etc. What was it? Something that isn't there, or there enough, in her writing. In all the excitement of muse-creation, she's probably let whatever it was slide right out the door. If you can get her to recall that feeling of interest and identify for herself what all triggered it, she might be able to stick with it.

And you've encouraged her again to give people what they want if she wants interactions by developing her muses. You've also done so, if it all applicable and true, by using yourself here, making it feel like not just a common problem, but one experienced and overcome by someone she cares about and trusts.

She might have an issue with needing a lot of high-interest, high-reward scenarios, too.

This is a high-effort, minimum reward situation for her. A lot of us in the RPC have shit like ADHD that can really make this difficult once we're experiencing it in this way, but even those who don't absolutely fall into it as well. So, you'll need ways to make it fun, but...I think if you can sort of kindly trick her into experiencing the effort as its own reward, it'd go a long, long way.

I can't really say what I do, having this problem with high-effort, minimal reward because I don't tend to experience that in RP. The writing is the reward for me, as much as I lose it utterly with happiness every time a writing partner is loving what I've given them. My reward system is set up around the writing and exploring characters. Hers seems to be set up around the reaction to it and amount of engagement with it. You need to try to use the latter to give her some of the former.

If she likes Halloween or Christmas, Fall or Winter, this could be your way into doing it!

Get her hyped about a seasonal prompt list you're doing. This does, yeah, mean you will have to do it, too lol but in the end, any time you aren't able to produce something daily like these lists usually are set up for, you're showing her that it isn't a job she's got to fulfill - the rules are only as strict as she wants to make them for herself. And if you keep yours short and fun, she'll feel like it's perfectly fine and good to do it this way as well. That it doesn't need to be a damn masterpiece or anything, just fun, something different to show off her muse.

While what she's actually doing, in addition to that, is getting in touch with and developing her muse. Importantly, when we write in a way that is just for ourselves like this, we tend to kind of...bond, for lack of a less weird sounding way of putting it, with a muse. It makes them stick with us longer, raising their importance and easier availability to us.

Let her know you're doing this, pick one out you genuinely like, and don't expect her to be down with it immediately. It's work with no foreseeable reward. Except, it's very hard to listen to our friends be excited, proud of themselves, enjoying themselves without wanting to join in. It'll be especially helpful, though, if you think people you interact with will like the posts and comment on them, or even try to turn them into threads if you include their muses (with their consent, of course, and no pressure). If she sees that, it might make it even more interesting to her. You might also have to pose this as her helping you out, that you don't think you'll get more than two done if she isn't doing it as well, as a sort of a challenge she can hold you to.

Whatever you think might work best for engaging her, you know her well, you can do it!

Be there to help her out with ideas if she goes for it. Throw out some easy, fun suggestions you think she might like, that even give her some opportunity to write something with her muse that she doesn't get a chance to. Pull from the muse's canon, is there something in their canon that goes with the prompt word "snow," for instance? Is it something she enjoyed about the canon story? Suggest it. Thinking about both the muse and your friend, is there something else that came to mind about that prompt you could suggest? Do it!

Again, whatever she's most into, it's an angle. Humor? Her serious muse is forced into a ridiculous, funny situation that involves the snow. Angst? A sad memory associated with the snow. Shipping? A romantic, fluffy scene (or steamy one). And so on.

Be there to express interest and encouragement while she's doing it. Don't do things that are going to come off as pressuring or helicopter moming her, of course! Like, asking how much she's gotten done, did she start working on it yet? That's a bad idea, unless she enjoys that sort of thing. Instead, tell her how much you can't wait to see this, ask about how it's going, tell her about yours to encourage her to talk about it.

And be there to be her audience when she posts it. This really seems to be her highest reward, so give it to her. Like the post, comment on the post, tell her in messages. Not individually, all of those things. If you can find a way to that doesn't mess up what you've got going on with your blog, mutuals, other friends, etc., mention it on your blog.

At this point, people might be both aware of her RP habits and wary of engaging with her, but someone might bite if you're enthused and go like the post. If it's applicable, make some jokes about it on the dash, turn it into a moment of inside joke-like crack for people to see. Mention that she wrote this and you loved it, link it or outright reblog her post. Hell, mention that you and her are doing such and such prompts for whatever holiday or season before the fact, that way, it doesn't come out of nowhere to your mutuals, either. Again, if applicable, you can ask to turn it into a thread.

The point, at this juncture, isn't to attract people to her blog and posts, it's to demonstrate to her that this is fun and rewarding. If you can get people to go like the posts, great, but you can only count on yourself to do it at first.

Most people enjoy those sorts of prompts on their dash from mutuals, though. You're always going to have some who feel like it's annoying because it wasn't strictly a RP reply, but whatever, they're not the majority in most fandoms anymore, thankfully. Point is, it's literally showing her mutuals that she's capable of thinking as her muse and working on her muse. It's showing off good things and making her muse more interesting and uniquely hers in a good way. And it's totally possible that she's going to organically generate likes, people wanting to use this as a plot with her for RP, and mutuals who are increasingly following along with every post made.

The hope is that she experiences the beginnings of more interest in the muse than she does making muses, gain some confidence in doing this with the enjoyment of it, and stick with a muse longer than five seconds so that she can actually end up with the interactions she wants.

There are definitely other ways of doing this, the prompt thing just came to mind because it's major prompt season. You've got a prompt list floating around for literally every popular point of interest right now, from whump to extreme fluff to horror to humor. And it's going to keep going until January. It's also something that can be as short as a paragraph or as long as several thousand words, and that a hell of a lot of people don't do all of. So, it's easy, so long as she's got a reason to find it interesting and stay on course with it even a little bit.

You could also try getting her into doing something like moodboards for her muse but with little additions of writing that go along with them. Nothing major, just things like a quote from her muse or a sentence from a starter, thread, whatever.

So long as you can get her to start refocusing on RP being enjoyable from the inside and not just the outside, it's valid as hell to try it! She seems to be experiencing RP as instant gratification and basing that gratification on things she can't control, like popularity.

Right now, even giving her the sober truth that one can write the best version of a canon muse there is to be found, be someone enjoyable and interesting in OOC interactions, and be an amazing writer without that being enough to garner popularity, or even the plots that are wanted. That being a very popular RPer and having more interactions than you know what to do with (honestly sucks ass) isn't a set of absolute values, but rather, variables that are always in flux and often, totally mysterious. It's usually a mixture of total luck, visual appeal, and both mun being on point with what people want to see right this second and muse being the mixture of fanon that is desirable, also, right at this exact second. It is seriously not within anyone's control, no matter how much effort, quality, or even outright bullshit they have to put out there.

If she's ever going to stick to a muse and not find herself envious, upset, and bored it's absolutely got to come from herself. She's got to be popular with herself, enjoying herself regardless of what others are seemingly achieving or want to give her. It's not going to be recognized no matter how harsh or sweet you are about the problem, unless she's capable of really looking at those problems as problems, and I don't think she's going to get to that point through negatively bottoming out. She might get there through the opposite, though!

It's...just going to take a lot of effort and patience from you, with no expectation of reward yourself.

Because it's still likely as hell it's just not going to happen. And while it seems like you are the kind of friend who would find the effort worth it because you care and are invested in her, please know that there's no shame in merely contemplating this and noping right out.

You've got a life and are trying to enjoy the hobby as well! And if it seems like something that could sour your friendship? It's not worth it. You're better off just accepting that she'll inevitably tire of doing this and move on to another hobby, maybe decide to do fandom blogs or something instead that you can support her in.

It's definitely an unenviable and frustrating position you're in. All you can really do is try not to let this negatively impact the friendship, to keep refraining from just outright telling her things she'd find hurtful, and try your best to show her that it's rewarding to develop the muse and stick with it, not a task. That there are improvements she can make to her blog, and that it isn't a negative reflection on her that they can be made. You can try all the compassionate trickery in the world to lead her there, but it's ultimately up to her whether she brushes this off as well, don't let it hurt your feelings or exasperate you too much!

Also, it's totally possible that even if you met through RP and/or it has been a big part of the friendship, you might have grown in different directions in the hobby.

Growing within the hobby is inherent to any hobby you stick to for long enough, especially if you started out in it young. Some people seamlessly just keep growing to things that make them happy, others experience a lot of growing pains along the way as they're maybe ready for change, but only in select areas they have to discover for themselves. Still others grow in a way that doesn't make them very happy, but they're both not ready (or willing) to approach why and what they can do, and also still too attached to the good times they had to reassess whether it's still something they want to do, or if it's something better moved away from into something else.

That's always very difficult as a friend. Difficult in watching your friends not go the same directions as you anymore, even in something as comparatively silly as a hobby, in seeing them not enjoying themselves, and in the possibility that it could signal the end of enjoying the hobby with them. It's sad and frustrating, and can feel lonely, but if you're close enough friends, you've got so many other things to still be good friends over, so keep that in mind!

She might need to keep doing this with her blog and muse situation until she comes not to the realization that she needs to change how she's RPing to get what she wants, but rather, that she wants to stop RPing. That could be the burnout that happens here eventually, but again, not only can you still be great friends, if it makes her happier, it's good.