#family shit tag

[broomsticks]

If you were “mature for their age” you might have been parentified. Parentification is when a child is made to fill an adult role.

This is an “invisible” trauma that has life long impact.

HERE’S WHY: 🧵

Parentification is an extremely common family dynamic where children are expected to: manage their parents emotions or issues (most common is marital problems), take care of the home & siblings on a regular basis, or act as a peer to a parent.

Many parents aren’t aware they’re doing this for several reasons:

1. They were parentified themselves

2. They’re overwhelmed & lack support

3. They don’t know/understand the language & culture so they depend on their children

Parentified children are treated as adults. They’re not seen as children who are emotionally developing & need emotional support to find their sense of self.

They’re seen as adult peers who are able to navigate crisis and any family issue.

Children adapt quickly to this role. They learn they must betray their own needs, desires, & emotions to keep the connection to a parent.

Many children feel a fierce sense of loyalty to the parent thats parentifying them.

They want to fix, rescue, & protect that parent. It’s a true role reversal.

This can be confusing because while they play a key role in the family: no one checks into see how they feel, or what they think.

Their emotional world is ignored.

Boundaries don’t exist.

The child learns to manage adult emotions. And doesn’t have the chance to understand their own inner world.

The result: a codependent view of love.

Adults who’ve been parentified have been conditioned (since childhood) to ignore how they feel. And to prioritize the needs of others.

They tend to find adult relationships where they: try to fix, rescue, or enable. Just as they did as children.

They struggle to understand what they actually feel, what they actually think, and what they actually need.

Parentified adults also feel a deep feeling of being misunderstood, of not being considered, and deep loneliness.

Many fill this void with constant “busyness”— always on call for other people’s crisis or issues. This feels their familiar childhood need to feel wanted.

The most important step in healing is learning to set boundaries.

Of course, this will also be the most difficult because:

1. Boundaries were non existent

2. Self worth comes through other people

3. Enmeshment (lack of boundaries) feels like closeness— though it’s superficial.

Working through the guilt of setting boundaries, meeting their own needs, & clearly speaking their own limits is challenging.

It will also be very healing— it’s self recovery.

[redysetdare]

All this aroace character shipcourse has proven to me that a majority of people that interact in fandom cannot actually interact with characters and media outside of shipping and genuinely I believe you need to learn how to interact with media outside of shipping.

[findafight]

Funniest part of Charles having cancer is that my grandpa might live to see his fourth British coronation

[myersesque]

i think it is so funny that adam and lawrence were given so long for their game. there are so many games that r like "do this super complicated and painful task in the next 5 minutes or you're dying horrifically!", but jigsaw lives for the drama and knew putting those two in a locked room together would be like a soap opera, so he gave them hours, just so they'd have time to air out the dirty laundry - and then gave himself front row seats. beautiful.

[golyadkin]

you can trust them, they're super scientists

[canonkiller]

devil's bargain; they will love you as a daughter, but it will be love.

[lunapegasus]

The unofficial official Robotnik family tree!

[z-mizcellaneous-z]

ship ask game: send me a ship in asks and I'll fill out the bingo card accordingly!

[pcktknife]

they r soooo father daughter

[littlelightfish]

Something I loved from the anime adaptation on episode 5:

They made a summary about Mick's and Kuro's characters and relationship from what they saw in this two panels on the few seconds this scene taked place.

Just this. Kuro and Mick both surprised on the first. Kuro looking at Mick like he's worried about something, and Mick eating bread in silence, looking in distrust at the guy.

The anime makes it so rich on subtle expressions, I'm in love here. They're just on the background of the scene. But what they do says really a lot about them.

When the guy first comes to scene, Mick looks a bit confused but nothing else. "Who tf this guy?" They're not planing on paying him any mind.

When he sits besides him, he gets uncomfortable, you can see it on his face he doesn't want to sit beside a stranger. He wants to get up and change places. "What's with this guy? What does he want? Why is he so close?" Kuro notices this and looks at him. He saw him flinch (off camera because guy is covering him). Mick is scared of this guy.

Mickbell is a naturally untrusty person because of his backstory. He gets uncomfortable when new people starts acting friends because "well that can't mean good, can it?" Kuro knows this because they share a life together and proceeds to try and calm him the best he can in this situation.

Kuro puts his hands on Mick's back. He already has them there when the camera changes angles. "I got you. I'm here. Nothing is going to happen to you. Calm down." Mick now looks confused at the guy, but it's still clear he's very uncomfortable there. He leans towards Kuro a bit "I feel safer by your side and this guy is wierd".

In seconds, as soon as he sees him grab food from their table, he changes his mood. He jumps in surprise at the audacity. He's now annoyed and pissed. That's their food! How dares he... But he isn't the one to say anything, and from this alone you could tell he's quite introverted outside of their friends group (or that he didn't pay for the food idk). Kuro keeps his hands in there, knowing he's nervous.

Mick just looks at him eat, annoyed, maybe angry, and silent. He isn't probably paying any mind to what this guy is saying. He is stealing food. He should go get food somewhere else. Kuro seems to think something alike, but he is a bit surprised this guy has the balls to steal food so openly (he isn't paying atention either ot he doesn't understand)

He thinks a lot of thinks but says none, eating in silence. Kuro is staring with no good intentions behind those eyes. Only murder. Food robber. Mick disturber. Deserves death.

[misssclumsy]

Desi parents be like "tumne abhi duniya dekhi kanha hai" and won't let you see duniya as well.

[crashqueen-motorbaby]

headcanon that when hop adopts billy, billy doesn’t start calling him ‘dad’, instead he calls him ‘pop’ instead of ‘hop’ one day by accident and just sticks with it

[thenonbinarydetective]

some of the things people say about Damian on here are fucking disgusting

I don't care if he's fictional, I would never say these things about a child

[sea-buns]

All the buffs they've added to the cooking mods is hilarious to me. Like it's for sure super fun and exciting. But imagine the world cracking apart at the seams and from the moment you wake up you are immediately pounced on by "DAD! DAD! LOOK WHAT I CAN DO!" *places brick oven*

I just imagine Chayanne has been surrounding his dads' beds with various plates of food. Cuz you KNOW he's a stress cooker.

And Talullah's like "bro that's a loose popsicle on the floor Missa's gonna slip and die"

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

This election day, I'm thinking of my Nana.

I'm thinking of how as a young woman, she fled political violence in her native Colombia to build a new home in a more stable country. I'm thinking about how she lived a long life, but not long enough to see her home country elect its first ever progressive president (just a few months ago!).

Coincidentally, I was living in Colombia at that time (in the very city she grew up in), and I was able to witness what felt like a miracle. A very conservative country, suffering from the violent inheritance of colonization and catholic invasion and the war on drugs, against a backdrop of the dangerous global rise of the far right--this unlikely country managed to elect one of the most progressive heads of state in the world, in 2022. That's a pretty big deal.

And I'm thinking about this, this election day, because that election was won by a very thin margin. I'm thinking about how it almost didn't happen. I'm thinking about how it was only possible thanks to the highest voter turnout in 20 year. And I am thinking about the countless number of voters who chose to vote for the first time. I am thinking of the poorest and most disenfranchised citizens who showed up at the polls. I am thinking of the indigenous women who rode 12 hours on public buses to vote at the 'nearest' polling stations. I am thinking of all the money and corruption that went into preventing minority citizens from voting, and I'm thinking about how they showed up in the millions and voted anyway.

I am thinking that I would like to see a miracle like that in my own home country.

So if you're on the fence about waiting in line today to cast your vote, I hope that you will think--about the country you want to live in, the future you hope will unfold, and about all of the people it takes to make a miracle.

Because history may deem us nameless and faceless, but when we show up en masse, we are the ones who make history happen.

And yes, maybe also spare a thought for my Nana. Who was in fact a very angry and judgemental woman who supported the republican party for 50+ years, and who would be turning in her grave right now (if the family hadn't had her cremated). Think about the mean angry ghost of my Colombian grandmother, who very much wants you to not show up at the polls to support abortion and other sinful progressive values. Think about her. Do it for her. Do it for Nana.

[biganimal92]

father's favorite