#source: frasier

[incorrect-tmnt2012-quotes]

April: Mikey, give Shini your number. Mikey: Can do! Shinigami: I don't want his number! Mikey: Not a problem. April: Take his number! Shinigami: No, I'm not that desperate. Mikey: None taken. Shinigami: That's not what I meant… Mikey: Shouldn't have assumed. Renet: Well, if you don't want it, I'll take his number. Mikey: I'm open to that! April: No! Only Shini! Mikey: Sounds good. Shinigami: Mikey, you should go. Mikey, leaving: On my way! April: Mikey, you should stay right where you are. Mikey, coming back: I've got nowhere to be! Shinigami: Shoo! Get out of here! Mikey: Roger that! Happy Friday everyone!

[golyadkin]

you can trust them, they're super scientists

[georgie3116]

Steve: If we wanna play it safe we can always make one of those pacts.

Natasha: Oh you mean, like if neither one of us finds anyone…

Steve: Yeah, exactly, we’ll marry each other.

Natasha: I was gonna say kill each other!

[daemon-is-perfectly-unhinged]

Jon: Are you happy?

Rhaegar: Are YOU happy?

Jon: No, but we're not talking about me.

[incorrectafcrichmond]

Colin: Richard was upset with Jan so Jan bought him a Mercedes.

Isaac: Woof.

Colin: And if you're suggesting I buy my way out of the problem, the answer is no. It's the cowards' way out.

Jan: Oh, so I'm a coward.

Colin: Yes.

Jan: Fine. But I'm a coward with a hickey.

[thedisdainfullysilentvisitor]

Logan: Why are you behaving this way? Roman: Because I had a banana thrown at me! Janus: *sighs* To you, not At you Janus: And you should know how to catch a banana! Roman: I am NOT having this argument again!

[thebearincorrectquotes]

Carmy: I’m not denying my feelings.  I’m so in tune with my emotions that I was able to move through them quickly.  In fact, I’ve logged them all in my journal. Let’s see, where are we? “5 AM: Blissful confusion. Something’s happened, but what?” “5:01: Ah, yes. An overwhelming sense of emptiness and despair.” “5:07…” - this one’s hard to read… oh, right! - “Wept uncontrollably.” “6:15: All cried out.  Hungry now.  Ate entire box of Frosted Flakes, they’re gr-r-r-reat!” So don’t you tell me I’m not in touch with my emotions!

[marksandrec]

Marks and Rec: Misc #2581

The thought is implied. (Dialogue from Frasier.)

[charmingradiobelle]

*sometime in Eden*

Lilith: so what brings you down here tonight?

Lucifer: my undying love for you.

Lucifer: oh damn— I meant to lead up to that!

[deadboyquotes]

Edwin: Niko was upset with Crystal, so Crystal bought her a “mercedes”

Charles: Woof

Edwin: And if you're suggesting I buy my way out of the problem, the answer is no. It's the cowards' way out.

Crystal: So I’m a coward?

Edwin: Yes.

Crystal: Fine, but I’m a coward with a hickey.

[tadc-incorrectquotes]

Gangle: I'm not denying my feelings! I'm so in tune with my emotions that I was able to move through all of them quickly. In fact, I've logged them all in my journal. Let's see, where are we?

Gangle: "5 AM: Blissful confusion. Something's happened, but what?" "5:01..." Ah, yes. "An overwhelming sense of emptiness and despair." "5:07..." This one's hard to read — oh, right! "Wept uncontrollably." "6:15: All cried out. Hungry now. Ate entire box of Frosted Flakes. They're g-r-r-reat!"

Gangle: So don't you tell me I'm not in touch with my emotions!

[welcomehomeincorrectquotes]

Frank: So, Mr Dear, what brings you here tonight?

Eddie: My undying love for you!

Frank: ...

Eddie: Ah shucks— I meant to lead up to that!

[sammys-magical-au]

Obi-Wan: alright. Let’s just drink our coffee and have some light, frothy conversation.

Anakin: fine. *takes sip*

Obi-Wan:

Obi-Wan: are you in love with Senator Amidala?

Anakin: *spits coffee everywhere*

Obi-Wan: … that was a bit frothier than I imagined.

[incorrect-aio-quotes]

Jack: Do you want me to answer as a friend or as a therapist? Jason: As a friend. Jack: See a therapist.

[harmonizingsunsets]

Castiel: I thought you liked Meg!

Dean: I do. I like her from a distance. You know, the way you like the sun. Meg is like the sun . . . except without the warmth.

[thebearincorrectquotes]

Richie: Why is Pete carrying a package of flour?

Carmy: Since he and Nat are having a baby, he heard that taking care of a bag of flour was good practice.

Sydney: And how’s it going?

Pete: Last night I dreamt my flour sack was abducted, and the kidnappers started sending me muffins in the mail.