#for some of these it's not so much that they scared me but they stayed with me/made an impact on me

[dadvans]

i feel the weight [7x09 coda, bucktommy]

Buck hadn't actually been planning on seeing Tommy tonight but the late night pit-stop at Eddie’s has him freaking out, so he shoots Tommy a text from the dark driver's seat of his jeep: kinda need to get out of my head. Could you come over?

The response is almost immediate: already in bed. If you’re safe to drive there’s a spot next to me waiting, followed by a selfie, Tommy shirtless sitting up in bed with his readers on.

Buck’s keys are turning in the ignition before his phone screen goes dark, and he’s pulling out of Eddie’s driveway to hurry over. Tommy gave him a key last week, and despite an odd track record staying over at exes’ places instead of them at his, he’s excited he finally gets to use it.

He lets himself in, kicking his shoes off and is still half tangled in his jacket when he nudges Tommy’s bedroom door open. The overhead light is still on and Tommy’s got what is clearly a World War Two biography thicker than a Tolstoy novel in his lap, fingers keeping his spot in place. He puts it on the nightstand and smiles so softly for a big guy, gives a little chin tilt greeting.

“Hey you,” he says. “Everything okay?”

“I don’t know,” Buck replies, taking broad strides over to his bedside and then climbing in Tommy's lap, straddling Tommy's hips, getting hands on his face to trace the rim of Tommy’s glasses with his thumb. “These are staying on, by the way.”

“Fine by me,” Tommy says and sighs, searching Buck’s face for a second. “Okay, sweetheart, let me take care of you.”

And then Buck loses himself for a little bit.

He comes back to himself sweaty, minus his pants, and come drunk, panting at Tommy’s side some time later. Tommy’s leaning on an elbow, looking at him. His glasses are crooked, and Buck reaches out to straighten them.

“Thanks.” Tommy snorts. “So, you wanna talk about it? Something happen during your shift today?”

“Not really. Sort of.” Evan sighs, and Tommy pets his hair, pushing the curls stuck to his forehead up. “Something going on with Eddie, and I feel like I shouldn’t even be talking about it, but I’m scared he’s going to hurt himself. I’m scared he’s going to do something that’ll hurt Chris in the long run too.”

“Sounds difficult.”

“Yeah, I mean, you guys are close too, so if you see him this week or sometime soon, just— could you check in with him? I don’t think I’m overreacting, but the situation seems crazy, and it just makes my head hurt." He sighs. "I'd honestly rather talk about anything else.”

“Okay, I can do that.” Tommy doesn’t sound placating. He never does when Buck talks about Eddie, which is a novel experience compared to Buck’s other relationships. And maybe that’s because Tommy is friends with Eddie, but also maybe it’s because Tommy’s just different like that.

Good for you, Bobby had said.

Buck smiles. “There is something good that happened earlier today, actually. I can tell you about that. Bobby told me he uh, approves. Of us.”

“Oh? Do all your relationships need Bobby’s stamp of approval?” Tommy asks wryly.

“No, no, it’s not like that. It’s just. Bobby’s seen me go through a lot of relationships, and I think he worries, you know? I have a tendency to not do the right thing sometimes, compromise too much, maybe, try too hard. And I think he’s seen how settled I’ve felt. At ease, you know?” Buck sighs. “It felt really good to hear.”

“That is good to hear.” Tommy’s hand combs through Buck’s hair down to cradle the back of his head, and he pulls them together for a soft kiss, just one. “I’m glad your dad approves of us, Evan.”

“Stop,” Buck says, but he’s smiling.

“Not in a million years,” Tommy replies, and he’s smiling too

[idkwhatever580]

Nat…

Masterlist

Taglist

Pairings: Natasha romanoff x reader!highschoolau

Prompt: Natasha and y/n like each other but are two dumb idiots that won’t ever confess their love. Or will they? (You know they will) both are about 17-18

Warnings: swearing, Natasha has bad parents

Pronouns: she/her mostly

A/N: Omg I need some fluff. lol all of my stuff is basically fluff. Also I’m graduating todayyy!!!!! I’m so excited!!! I’m gonna cry 😭

Nobody’s Pov

Natasha and y/n are having yet another sleepover. Ever since Natasha turned 16 she was basically kicked out.

And so naturally her best friend y/n welcomed her immediately into her home.

And of course y/n’s parents were more than happy to take her in.

Natasha goes home sometimes, but mostly stays in the y/l/n’s guest room which at this point is her own room.

And yet, the girls always find themselves asleep together in one of either beds.

Natasha lies awake behind y/n in an almost spooning position, and she just admires y/n from afar. She can’t even see y/n’s face but she doesn’t care. She softly trails her nimble fingers up and down her arms and shoulders.

Her touch is so light. Yet not enough to wake up y/n. Or so she thought.

Y/n’s pov

I softly awake to Nat’s hands rubbing up and down my arm.

I don’t want her to pull away like she always does, so I stay as still and as calm as possible.

I won’t move a muscle so that she stays close to me.

Okay. Sure. Maybe I do have a little crush on her.

Maybe it’s not so little.

We’ve known each other since we started school. And although her parents are assholes, I’ve always been by her side. Through thick and thin.

So of course I was bound to fall in love with her.

It’s hard though. She hates physical touch but I’m her exception. She loves simple things like holding pinkies. Or a slight touch of shoulders or knees. But when we’re alone she’s all over me.

And yeah it’s nice but it’s hard when she doesn’t like me the same way. It’s hard when she’s so flirty too.

But I don’t care. All I can about right now is the fact that she is touching me.

I keep pretending to sleep but I know I move a lot in my sleep so I decide to turn around and snuggle into her. She won’t do anything since I’m “asleep.”

She pauses her movements scared she’s woken me up but then when she thinks I’m still asleep she envelopes me in a hug.

I softly breathe into her neck and smell her.

She smells nice.

She smells my hair. And rubs my back. And I wish she’d do this in a romantic way. But that’s not her thing.

But then. Out of the blue she starts whispering to me. Obviously she thinks I’m still asleep. And I guess I’m doing a good job. But I’ve always been god at fake sleeping. And it’s not like she’s a super spy or anything.

She starts whispering into my head from where she is. Like she’s wanting to tell me this.

“Y/n, I don’t know how or why, but I’ve fallen for you.”

If I wasn’t fake sleeping I would be shitting my pants right now. But I want to hear what she has to say so I keep up my facade.

“I love your hair and how it looks in the wind. I love how your nose crinkles a bit when you smile. I love you have little specks of gold in your eyes when you look at the sun.”

She sighs and continues

“I wish I was brave enough to tell you all of this. I wish I could kiss you and tell you how much I love you.”

She is getting a bit choked up and I hear her sniffle a bit but she keeps going

“I wish you loved me. But you don’t. So I can’t ever tell you these things. Because I don’t want to lose you. If I can’t have you as a lover, then I’ll take you as my friend. And that’s okay.”

She sniffs a bit more and continues, god what I’d do to kiss her right now

“I just don’t know what I’m going to do when you fall in love with someone else. I’m not ready to hear you talk about your crush. I’m not ready for you to break my heart. I’m not ready to watch you at the altar and hear you say I do to a stranger as I stay silent when they ask if anyone objects.”

Another sigh. She starts scratching my head softly.

“But I won’t say anything. I will never tell you how the first time you gave me butterflies, I thought I was actually sick. I thought I was having a heart attack at 16. And I never said anything. I can’t. I won’t. Your happiness matters too much to me. So I’ll stay your best friend. And I’ll let you go.”

She holds me tighter and says

“Because sometimes when you love something, you have to set it free”

My heart clenches at her words.

She really does love me. Oh my god she loves me back. I have to tell her!

I almost jump up but then I realize she’d know I was fake sleeping if I jumped up. So I pretend to shuffle a bit.

She stops her speech knowing I’ll be “waking up” soon and just continues to scratch my head softly.

I “wake up” and peek my eyes open at her.

She smiles and says

“Hi”

I send her a dopey smile full of love back at her and say

“Hey”

Then we pull apart awkwardly and I don’t know how to tell her that I love her too.

So I end up letting us get ready and then we go downstairs for breakfast.

My mom has known about my crush on nat for a while but she doesn’t mind. She thinks it’s cute.

And my dad has an idea about it but he doesn’t really dabble with my relationships yet. They’re both supportive though thankfully.

We eat breakfast and have some small talk.

Natasha knows I don’t like to talk a bunch in the mornings. But when we’re done with breakfast and put our dishes in the sink to clean later we head back up to my room.

“Wanna play Roblox?”

Natasha asks me with a smile knowing I love Roblox on Saturdays.

I nod my head and we jump on the bed and I decide I should tell her.

We sit on my bed and I set my phone down as I think of how to tell her. She suddenly says

“You alright?”

I nod my head and say

“Can I tell you something?”

She sets down her phone and nods her head. Then we face each other sitting with our legs criss crossed and she’s all ears.

“I have this crush on this girl.”

A flash of dread goes over her face. Clearly she is not ready to hear this yet. But she doesn’t know it’s her. Either way she covers it up and pretends to be excited.

“Omg! Really? Who is she! Do I know her? What’s her name? What does she look like?”

I smile cheekily and say

“Well. I won’t tell you her name yet”

She groans at my teasing and I continue regardless

“But. I’ll tell you about her and then I’ll tell you who she is.”

She nods her head and is staring at me.

“Well, her hair is so pretty. It’s curly and red. And her eyes are like forests.”

I kind of look off into space and keep talking as if I’m imagining my dream girl

“Her smile is so pretty and we’re pretty good friends. Her laugh is so contagious and she just lights up the room wherever she goes. She has had a rough life, but she’s never lost her heart. And she’s so kind to me. But I think the thing that gets me is how she loves everyone and everything. She talks to passionately about her feelings and her hopes and dreams to me. And it’s really only a few people she lets in and I am so lucky to be her friend. And I think she likes me back”

Natasha’s shoulders slump a bit more every few seconds and she’s droopy now. I look back at her and say

“Any guesses?”

I send her a sly smile and she looks at me and says

“Wanda?”

I start laughing my ass of and I say

“Oh man you’re so funny. Heck no! She might fit my type but definitely not her.”

Then Natasha kind of shrugs her shoulders and is gloomy now. She doesn’t care that she’s showing her dissapointed face at my crush.

I lift her chin up and say

“Nat…”

I give her a look telling her everything she needs to know. But she doesn’t believe me so she says

“Who is it then?”

I smile and giggle at her obliviousness and I say

“I’m not gonna tell you until you give me some advice. What should I do about it?”

She sighs and says

“I guess you should tell her.”

I smile and say

“Nat…”

She looks at me and says

“What?”

I smile and say

“I just did”

Her face turns pale and she says

“Wha- what do you mean?”

I giggle and say

“Natty, I just told her.”

She blinks a bit and silently points at herself as if she doesn’t believe me.

I laugh and nod and then I say

“I really really like you nat. And I wanna kiss you”

Usually I am not this bold so she is a bit dumbfounded and she nods her head so I lean in until I’m about half an inch away from her and she takes the initiative to go the rest of the way.

The kiss is soft and tender. Wayyy better than i imagined. And her lips are divine. They make me think of when the girl from the Lorax was describing truffula trees. (I don’t know. Don’t ask)

Then I pull away in need of air even though I don’t want to and we just stare at each other.

I look back at her lips and now I have become very shy. So she takes the lead and kisses me hard on the lips this time.

She ends up pushing me back on the bed and I wrap my left hand around her side and my right one threads into her hair.

We kiss and kiss and then after a bit, she trails her tongue along my bottom lip asking for permission and I grant it.

When she puts her tongue in my mouth I almost pass out. God she’s going to be the death of me.

This kiss is amazing. After a bit more kissing I accidentally let out a moan and it brings us back to reality so she pulls away.

I keep my eyes closed for a few seconds and a dopey smile is on my face.

She giggles at my flustered state and I finally open my eyes and awkwardly say

“Hi”

She laughs and says

“Hi”

We sit in silence for a bit until she gets off of me and I sit up. I look at her and say

“I’m sorry”

Her eyebrows furrow and she says

“Why?”

I look at my hands in my lap and I say

“I heard you this morning. When you said all those things to me. I’m sorry I didn’t say anything earlier but I didn’t know how to tell you”

She scoffs and shoves my shoulder slightly saying

“You little fuck!”

I laugh and then say

“Forgive me?”

She thinks about it and says

“I’ll forgive you if you say yes to this…”

I nod my head and dramatically say

“I’d do anything for my queen to forgive me!”

She laughs and says

“Be my girlfriend?”

My breath catches in my throat and all I can muster up is a nod.

She smiles and gives me a soft peck and my face turns red. I am all awkward now so I say

“What now?”

not knowing what to do and Natasha says

“Well. We could play Roblox?”

I nod my head and gasp and say

“Wanna be Roblox girlfriends?!”

She nods her head at my childishness and I pump my fist knowing Roblox girlfriends is like the ultimate title. Then my mom knocks on my door and says

“Y/n?”

“Come in!”

I smile at my mom and she narrows her eyes at me and says

“You’re being suspicious…”

She takes a look around my room but drops it and says

“Can you please text me those pictures from last night?”

I nod my head and say

“Do you want the ones of me in my cap and gown?”

she nods her head and says

“Yeah and make sure you send me the one of you throwing your cap in the air”

I nod my head and she leaves. Then I turn to Natasha and she says

“I can’t believe we graduated yesterday and now we’re dating!!!”

I nod my head and say

“Roblox baby”

“Yes of course. I forgot”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: sorry about the last part. I didn’t know how to finish it and graduation has been on my mind.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taglist

@ihartnat @ilovesnat

[urfavlarry]

If you're comfortable with that, maybe female reader getting the stars tattooed on her forearm sh scars? Like the "you drew stars around my scars" line by taylor swift. And some of the stars are just normal stars, some lines and some are stars drew by joost. And also maybe before tattooing them, her asking joost to draw stars on a piece of paper

You drew stars around my scars

Joost Klein x fem!reader

warnings: mentions of sh scars, swearing, some school trauma, back stabbing/fake friends, most likely bad grammar

genre: fluff/hurt comfort

summarry: Joost has never really noticed your sh scars despite being with you for almost half a year. You got used to covering them but you decided it would be a cute idea to get a tattoo on the things that caused you such sorrow in your high school years

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╰┈➤ ⋆｡‧˚ʚ 🐦 ɞ˚‧｡⋆

Joost kept asking you about what the stars were for all week, following you around and trying to get at least the slightest bit of information out of you. You never gave him a straight answer or you avoided the question completely. Joost was going mad, staying up with his thoughts and questions running through his mind like mathematical equations. What could you possible need him to draw stars for? A week ago you came up to him with your beautiful and sweet smile which lit up his day all the time. He hugged you, kissing you on the nose before letting you speak your mind. “Could you pretty please draw a few stars for me? Different sizes please.” You ask and he raises a brow at your mischief, but did as you told him, drawing you quite a lot of stars, circling the ones he like the most before handing the piece of paper to you. You smiled and kissed his forehead before going off somewhere.

A week later he was home alone while you were off somewhere in another country visiting a friend you haven’t seen for quite some time. Joost would’ve gone with you but he had important plans for the day of the departure which you understood. He texted every day, asking you how your day was and sending you videos or voice messages of him telling you and showing you how his day way and what he did. He missed you dearly but you were coming back tommorow night, which gave him so much energy he couldn’t even sleep from the pure excitement of seeing you again. You on the other hand were nervous. Of course, excitement filled your body from even thinking about going back but it was the first time you would be telling Joost about your high school years. Well it could go many possible ways, but you mostly tried to think about the positive outcomes. Joost wasn’t the type to get angry at someone for this, he’s going to be there for you and you’re confident in that statement.

Around 5:38AM you got to the airport, the plane was supposed to be departing at around 7:40AM. You texted Joost the whole time you were waiting for the plane, saying your goodbyes once you were supposed to board the plane. The hours felt like 15 minutes, getting off you took a uber home so you wouldn’t bother Joost. Once you got there, you walked to your shared apartment and you felt like you couldn’t breathe. Anxiety filled every single part of you, but you tried your best to shake it off, unlocking the door and get greeted with the warmth of the apartment. A quiet curse could be heard in the room and a few crashes, which alarmed you but then again you’re living with Joost Klein, so you weren’t that scared. You walk to the living room/kitchen and see Joost there holding your favourite flowers and what looked like a hand made gift. You smile softly, walking over and hugging him, not letting him go for a few minutes. He looked tired but happy to see you, leaving kisses all over your face.

Spending the day with Joost was all you could’ve asked for, but he still didn’t notice the new tattoo that was on your upper arm. That’s where the scars that haunted you during your high school years were. You hoped he would notice them first because you didn’t have a clue how to even start that conversation. What would you even say? Hey so I hurt myself in highschool and got this tattoo! Cool ain’t it? Of course not! Little did you know that Joost noticed the tattoo, he was just trying to approach the subjest in a not ignorant way. He understood how you felt, life gets really tough and he’s sad to see you went through something so bad you had to go to that for comfort. He decided to run his fingertips along the scars, making you gasp slightly and put your hand on top of his. You look at him, beautiful ocean blue eyes looking at you with nothing but sympathy. “I.. uh, how do I start this..” You say, trying to explain yourself but Joost just brings you into a warm embrace. “You don’t need to explain yourself my love, I’m sorry you had to go through something so horrible to make yourself do this.” He says with comfort but hesitance, choosing his words carefully. It was clear he cared but he had no idea what to even say in this situation. “I think it’s time you know.” You say and he nods, kissing your forehead and grabbing your hands, and interlocking your fingers.

And so you tell him everything, from start to finish. How school overwhelmed you and never finding the right people at school, all of them always stabbing you in the back in some way. You felt like it was a silly reason, something that wasn’t as serious as other peoples problems but he made you push those thought away. “Everyone has their own struggles, none are bigger then the others. They are all the same. It’s something that bothers you and just because someone had a ‘better reason to do it’ , which is totally not true and nobody should say or think, you should never think they aren’t important and don’t need help because the internet says they aren’t valid.” His soft smile was intoxicating, slowly making your frown turn into the smile he so loved.

“Thank you, thank you so much Joost.” You say, tears threatening to fall. They weren’t sad tears, of course not they were the tears of pure relief and joy. He wiped your tears, kissing your cheek and then looks at you with his signature, cute smile. “Live the tattoo.” He says and you giggle, showing it off to him. His eyes light up when he sees the stars he drew, along with other stars. You told him about every single one and who they were from and what they had to do with it and why you even let them draw a star for you. He listened to every single word that came out of your mouth, asking about your silly tales every now and then, which made you even more excited to talk about it. Joost couldn’t stop looking st the tattoo, tracing both the scars and stars, taking multiple pictures and showing them off to both his fans and friends. “So proud of her.” He would say to everyone, which made your heart melt.

That night he made a promise with you. “I promise on our never ending love i’ll always be here whenever you feel down, unworthy, unloved, sad. I’ll always be here no matter the situatuon and promise to listen to your problems.” He says, kissing your soft lips and embraced you for what felt like the 100th time that day. You stayed like that in each others comfort, letting all the bad emotions wash away into the stars of the night sky, miles and miles away.

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╰┈➤ ⋆｡‧˚ʚ 🐦 ɞ˚‧｡⋆

!! do NOT copy or repost any of my work on other platforms !!

[itsangelll]

𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧’𝐭 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐞𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮. ✰

A/n:hey cuties finally a fic out after a month 😭 this is a collab with @tomssexdoll I think we absolutely did amazing she’s a fabulous writer!! I hope you guys enjoy <33

parings: 2011 Mafia Bill x Freader

genre:angst to smut to fluff?

MDNI

warnings:A LOT of swearing p in v dom!bill sub!freader a bit of abuse please please do not read if your uncomfortable or sensitive with these topics!!

You and bill were forced to get married, the promise of your businesses improving if we did. You guys obviously agreed to this wanting to make as much money and more deals if you could.

You and bill had a lot of sex mainly during a middle of an argument, you were both very stubborn and immature, not willing to accept yours and his mistakes. You both had your good moments together not everything was terrible with him, sometimes he’d hold you and tell me how much he loved you, but his actions would be speak a lot more than words. Most nights Bill would be gone coming home at midnight or even later, lying to you constantly the question that always lingered in the back of your mind was that did he really love you or was he just using you?

You both had multiple fights a week some even becoming more abusive than usual, one got so bad he almost succeeded at throwing a chair at your head. You guys hated being like that towards each other but you couldn’t help it. It was way too stressful and overwhelming of being one of the top mafia couples in the world.

Bill came home late one night again saying goodbye to all his buddies as they sped off, he fiddled with the door before swinging it open and slamming it shut, You were in the lounge, it was pitch black having a cigarette lit your legs crossed, you felt like scaring him making him mad anything at all.

As he went to walk up the stairs you startled him with your voice, “And where the fuck where you exactly.” “Jesus Christ don’t scare me like that why are you in the dark for?” he grumbled before turning on a light noticing your red puffy eyes.

“Have..have you been crying?” he scoffed “As a matter of fact I have did you know how fucking worried I was about you what if you got shot?” You raised your voice after talking a long drag from your burning cigarette.

“Fuck sake like you’d care wether if I was dead or alive, can’t I have my fucking fun? I’ve been stuck here for a week with you for work” he went over to the liquor cabinet taking out his aged whiskey and sitting in his chair pouring the burnt umber drink into the glass.

“You’re a fucking asshole you know that right?” You glared at him your jaw slightly clenched “trust me I know” he lit a cigarette as well “you tell me everyday just as I tell you that you’re a whiny bitch all the time.” he gave you a sarcastic smile rolling his eyes and taking a huge sip from his whiskey.

“I can’t believe you just go out, stay out till 5 in the morning and I get no fucking call at all, you expect me to greet you with cookies and milk but yet you still think I’m a shit wife your the fucking, pathetic one here.” You shouted, “don’t yell at me you drive me up the wall here” Bill yelled back getting up from his chair and storming over to me, he grabbed your wrist with so much force pulling you up towering over you.

“oh you think you scare me? Nice try.” I snatched my wrist away, blowing the smoke in his face, Bill just stood there his gaze burning into mine a certain rage taking over him.

“You are so controlling can’t a grown man do what he wants when he wants?.” He huffed his chest heaving up and down in anger Bill was gonna snap at any moment. “I’m the controlling one here?! Aren’t you the one who gets mad at me for looking in another guys direction, you beat up any man I talk to refuse to let me go out when I’m apparently wearing something too “short” but yes bill I’m the controlling one you fucking hypocrite.” You scoffed shaking your head.

“At least I have good reasons, you’re the one getting upset over me being out late suck it up doll.” he spat his words cruel, “You just don’t get it do you? It’s not the fact that you’re out late I don’t give a shit do what you want, It’s the fact that I never got told where you are, I’m sitting here late at night wondering where you are and if I should call the police or not, I’m really fucking sorry for worrying about you is that so bad?” Your voice still raised anger coursing through your veins.

“You make me so fucking mad..” he grunted walking closer towards you narrowing his eyes at you. “Cry me a river,you’re a grown man aren’t you? Learn how to deal with your emotions properly.” You rolled your eyes, Bill grabbed your hair pulling you close “don’t fucking speak to me that way!!” he yelled inches away from your face.

You pushed him off slapping him harshly across the face leaving a bright red hand mark. “Don’t you ever fucking touch me like that” you screamed, “You know what I could kill you right now.” He yelled back rage in his voice.

“Shoot me then fucking shoot me.” I yelled my voice starting to strain. you and bill just stood there silent for a second both of your chests heaving up and down.

Without another word bill grabbed you by your waist and kissed you passionately his tongue entering your mouth searching for dominance, “Your so fucking whiny aren’t you” he muttered between kisses, his hand roughly slapping your ass you couldn’t help but moan. He pulled away from the kiss a string of salvia parting from your mouth, Grabbing your hand and taking you upstairs he had a pretty strong grip you almost couldn’t keep up.

When you guys made it to your room he threw you on the bed towering over you his dark brown orbs filled with such lust, wasting no time he ripped off your shirt then your jeans leaving you in nothing but your black lace set of lingerie. Bill groaned at the sight a large tent forming in his pants, “You’re so pretty f’me Schatzi” he said in a raspy voice, your breath hitched your core getting even more wet. Even though sometimes Bill was a complete prick you couldn’t help the affect he had on you.

He unclasped your bra and ripped off your underwear, your nipples and your wet cunt getting exposed to the cool air a shiver went down your spine running his fingers over your breasts. You whined “Don’t be a tease Billy this isn’t fair” he smirked and lifted your chin up “Does my doll want me fuck her dumb hm? Is that what you want?” His knee was rubbing your clit non stop, you could burst any second nodding desperately Bill without any hesitation removed his belt in one swift move, his jeans and boxers pool at his ankles letting his cock spring free.

Even though how many time you guys have fucked you could never get over how big he was. Bill swiped a finger at your folds his finger now coated with your arousal “I haven’t even done anything yet and your already wet for me doll you’re just that desperate aren’t you?” You couldn’t answer, He snickered without another warning he slammed into you then pulling back out fully before filling you up once again. You moaned loudly the way his cock fit your pussy was amazing, His hands made their way down to your waist gripping tightly bound to leave marks tomorrow. “Fuck Jesus you feel s’good around my cock love gonna fill this slutty hole with my cum” he groaned out.

Bill moved at a rapid pace his tip kissing your cervix perfectly moans were spilling out of you uncontrollably, you were in pure ecstasy, your walls clenched around him every time he hit that gummy spot the knot in your stomach growing tighter with each passing second “Mm Bill fuck fuck I’m close!” you breathed out he moved his hand down to your clit rubbing his thumb in fast circles, “Cum on this cock for me doll” he whispered you were about to break.

Those words were all you needed to hear, your legs shaking bringing you over the brink you screamed out his name cumming all over his cock, “Fuck baby that’s it” Bill let out a low growl before shooting his cum inside you thank god you were on the pill. He collapsed on top of you, lifting his head up and pressing a kiss to your temple, “You okay my sweet girl? Did I go to rough?” he said in worry, you smiled “Yes billy I’m okay it was amazing” you replied.

“I’m sorry about the fight earlier Liebe you just mean to much to me and I can’t lose you ever I don’t know what I’d do” you were in awe “Billy you aren’t ever going to lose me I promise you that” you took his hand in yours and kissed him passionately you really did love him.

A/n:I hope you guys enjoyed! Me and @tomssexdoll worked really really hard on this, she did an amazing job. but I’m glad I’m writing again, I’m gonna try and write more mwah bye cuties <33

Taglist:

@itsmealaiah

@noellethinks

@jadedchar

@madzandmore

@memzyyy

@tomssexdoll

[writingroom21]

Can I get a request!

Rafe and y/n are both working parents, so they have a nanny, but the nanny develops a crush on rafe

Kinds like one tree hill storyline with nanny Carrie

A/N: I love the way your mind works. I hope you enjoy!

You're All That I Want

Pairing: dad!rafe x mom!reader

Summary: You hire a nanny when you go back to work. A serious of weird interactions make you think that the nanny is into Rafe.

Warnings: fluff, Rafe being a softy for his family, feelings of insecurity, (Let me know if I missed any)

Wc:3.0K

When your son Luca was born everything was perfect. Rafe finally felt comfortable in himself. His fathers words weren’t plaguing him, keeping him up at night just to tell him he’s a failure. All the nightmares throughout your pregnancy seemed worth it when he finally held his baby boy in his arms. He couldn’t have been happier. 

He had the perfect wife and now he had a son. A baby boy who completed your family, making his heart grow even more. Rafe was originally scared when you told him you were pregnant. The both of you had only been married for a year at that point. All of the negative emotions that he worked to put behind him came rushing back like a tsunami. 

His father’s hatred is at the forefront of his mind. He thought he was destined to fail, ruin the family he desperately wanted. “It’s okay. We can figure it out together. For better or for worse, right?” You rationed with him. Never letting him forget he isn’t his father.

“Thank you  for coming with me today.” You had just gotten out of an appointment. Rafe was focused on the little picture in his hands. The sonogram showing a blurry blob that was your baby. “Why wouldn’t I come? This is our baby.” He’s confused on why you would think he wouldn’t show. Yes he’s busy with work but you and the baby come first. “It’s just some guys wouldn’t think about showing up during the work day. So thank you for being an amazing dad.”

You kiss him on the check and continue walking. That’s the first time you called him dad. The role of the parental figure feels heavy. Then he looks at that blurry blob and at you. A sense of pride fills him, his family. From that moment on the nightmares didn’t seem as scary. They still made him doubt himself but it was manageable. 

Then on a sunny Friday morning your baby decided to make his entrance to the world. He was the most beautiful thing you have ever seen. You were crying as the nurses placed him on your chest for the first time. Luca’s little wales calmed once he felt your touch. “Hi baby boy.” You whisper, stroking his head lightly with one finger. You turn to look at Rafe.

He had tears streaming down his face as he watched the two of you. He has been staying back, watching his son from a distance. Following him around as the nurses cleaned him up after he had cut the umbilical cord. Once he saw his son and his wife bonding he broke. Every worry dissipated from his body. Knowing that he would do anything to keep the two of you safe.

Rafe was glued to your side from that day on and since your baby was glued to you, he always had eyes on the two most important things in his life. He felt lucky that he ran the family business. Since Rafe was the boss he could take as much time off as he wanted. You on the other hand had a steady job. 

In fact you were a nurse at the same hospital you gave birth at. They had so gracefully given you five months of maternity leave. It sure helps that they had an anonymous donor all of a sudden. Rafe just wanted to spend as much time with his family that he could. He knew you would want to work so he found a happy medium. His ideal would be you staying at home but you insist on continuing to work. He honestly values that quality in you, hoping that Luca and any future kids get it as well.

The first few weeks were hell. The two of you didn’t know how to handle a baby. Your mom tried to help as much as she could but you and Rafe wanted to figure it out on your own. It took a while but you got the hang of it. Soon feedings, nap time, and bed time were going smoothly. The five months had seemed to fly, feeling as if he was just born yesterday.

Towards the end of your maternity leave you both had a conversation. It was finally time for you to think on how to move forward with child care. “I have to be honest here. I love being at home but I miss being at work. I miss my patients, Rafe. I don’t know what to do.” You confide in your husband. Feeling ashamed for wanting to work. “Hey if that’s what you want we'll make it work. I won’t stop you.”

You look at him, trying to find comfort and finding it hard. “You don’t think I’m failing as a mother? Putting my job before our family?” You question, your fear finally being voiced. “Baby you are a great mom. I wouldn’t be as good of a dad if it wasn’t for you.” He comforts you. “I think you should do what makes you happy. If that’s going back to work then we’ll just find a nanny. It’s not a big deal.” You kiss him, grateful to have such a loving husband.

The Rafe you knew in highschool was completely different. He was a  trouble maker that made you fall for him. But now he’s everything that you dreamed of and better honestly. “Thank you.” You say after breaking the kiss. “How about we go look at nanny’s?” He questions, pecking you one last time.

The hunt for a nanny didn’t take long. The last five candidates really just have to pass the Luca test. He’s been fussy with people that aren’t you or Rafe. The only exception really being your parents and Sarah. Poor Wheezie is still trying to get him to like her.

All the candidates seemed perfect but Luca had other thoughts. Each one dropped like flies, not one lasting long enough to be considered. That was until Candice. She came in with a bright smile and Luca seemed to like her. You and Rafe watched as they played together, sharing a look knowing you finally found someone. Relief filling you both now that you have a solid plan. She was hired on the spot, instructed on all his needs and when to show up next week.

The final week was ignoring the outside world and spending as much time together. Taking every chance to cuddle with your precious boy and on rare occasions taking the opportunity to be alone. It was a perfect way to send you back off to the workforce. That was until your first day on the job.

You were happy to be back. Catching up with old co-workers, filling them in on the new addition to the family. Seeing the old patients that were still here and meeting the new ones. There was just this part of you that missed being at home. You chalked it up to just being back and went on with the day. The routine followed the same few a month or two. You went to work and longed to be home. A part of you telling you that something wasn’t right.

It never made sense, you loved your job. Sure there were some moments you didn’t like it, you just loved to help people. It’s normal to miss your child but this was something deeper. 

One day you got out of work early. Excited, you rushed home and were ecstatic when you saw that Rafe was already home. It wasn’t late so you could feed Luca and the three of you could spend time together. Once in the house you hear Rafe talking to the nanny.

“So basically you just buy property and sell them?” You hear her question. “Umm it’s a little more complicated than that. It can be stressful but yeah that’s the jist of it.” Rafe answers. There’s some clanking sounds of pots hitting each other. “You know if you are ever stressed I can help you.” Candice states. 

You freeze at her words. “Well thank you for watching Luca. Here’s your paycheck, see you tomorrow.” Rafe dismisses. You walk into the kitchen, looking at the two of them. Candice is sitting on the kitchen island and Rafe is moving around the kitchen. Candice turns to see you, her eyes narrowing a bit. “Oh hi Mrs. Cameron. I didn’t see you there.” Rafe looks over at you when you are mentioned. He smiles and walks over, giving you a deep kiss. “Hi baby.” He says, squeezing your ass a bit. “Hi.” You giggle, looking over his shoulder to see her gone.

You don’t mention how you feel, bottling it up and storing it away. Chalking it up to it being a weird interaction. Then you come home again a little earlier than expected. As soon as the door is open, arms wrapped around you. “How was your day Mr. Cameron?” A sultry voice asks. You push Candice off of you, her shocked expression matching yours. “Excuse me?” She backs away. Her hands rubbing together to calm her nerves. “I’m sorry I didn’t think you would find it inappropriate.” She reasons.

“Inappropriate? You said Mr. Cameron, were you waiting for my husband?” You accuse. Her eyes widened, her head shaking. “No I swear. I said Mrs. Cameron. You must have misheard. God I’m so embarrassed, I’m so sorry.” She seems genuine. Against your better judgment you let it go not wanting to think further into it.

The following week you get out of work, heading home just wanting to sleep. You had to stay extra today, your body is exhausted. You enter the house on pilot mode. Going through the motion as if you were in a game, all of your actions already being chosen. You didn’t snap out of it till you made it to the door of the living room. You saw Rafe and went to call out to him, stopping when you saw candice on the couch next to him.

They were close, leaning into each other. You stand there, an agonizing feeling in your chest. Why is he so close to her? Your mind thinks back to the way she threw herself on you. Of course she was waiting for Rafe. How fucking stupid could you be. Yet you knew he would never do this to you.

“Hey baby. Hi baby boy” You walk in and go over to Rafe, giving him a kiss. Picking up Luca for his playmate to give him a kiss. You look at Candice and she’s glaring at you. “Hi Candice. I’m going to go get cleaned up and we can have dinner.” Rafe’s hands find your thighs, rubbing up and down. He pulls you a bit closer, looking up at you. “Sounds good. I’ll put Luca’s toys away and get his food ready. Let me take him.” You hand him over to his dad, Rafe takes the time to kiss you one more time. 

That night in bed you let your mind wander. Voicing your discomfort in your own way. “The nanny is kinda cute, isn’t she?” You ask, head moving to look at him. He's reading a book and doesn’t really move to look at you. “Huh?” “I said the nanny’s kinda cute right?” This catches his attention.

People might think he’s stupid but he’s actually pretty smart. He knows what you are getting at here. You are starting to feel uncomfortable, maybe even jealous. “I guess, I never thought of it.” You hum at his response. It doesn’t give you much to go on. “It’s nice that she stays later even once you get home.” Rafe raises an eyebrow at you. Surely you're not implying what he thinks you are. “Yeah it is. Think we should give her a pay raise?” He jokes.

You suck in a breath, hurt starting to seep in. He wants to pay her extra for flirting with him? “What do you guys do while you wait for me to get home?” You get straight to the point. You are fed up of coming home and seeing how close together they are. You need to know if you are wasting time here. Rafe just looks at you, his eyes shutting closed and then pening up.

“Do you really think I would cheat on you?” He doesn’t hold back. The book is thrown off the bed as he turns his body to you. “No. I just can’t help the feeling that she likes you. That you will see that she’s better. It’s stupid but I really think she likes you.” He feels relieved knowing you don’t find him capable of that. He could never hurt you, you are everything to him.

“I’m never leaving you. I don’t think she has one and even if she does I don’t care. You’re all I want. We will be ninety and getting on each other's nerves. For better or for worse.” You laugh, your worries leaving. He was right, for better or for worse. 

Rafe didn’t understand why you were so worried anyway. All Candice asks him is about his day, job, and golfing. She will talk about her life from time to time but nothing more. He just simply didn’t see why you were so worried. The relationship between him and her was strictly platonic.

Rafe had beaten you home today. An account hadn’t taken him as long to close as he planned. He figured that this was a perfect time to make it up to you. He knows you have been having a tough time recently so he wants to make you feel better. Rafe had ordered your favorite food, went to the store and got your favorite chocolates and flowers. On the way home he even called your mom to see if she could take Luca for the night. He wanted to give you a stress free night.

“Candice, I'm home.” Rafe shouts into the house as he enters. His plan is to get her out of the house as soon as he can and bring Luca to your moms. He brings the bags to the kitchen, wanting to get everything set up. He’s in the middle of plating the food when he feels arms wrap around him. He smiles for a moment, thinking you got home and caught him doing something nice. He realizes something is wrong when the body leans deeper into him. He looks down and doesn’t see your ring.

“Can’t believe you would do this for me.” Candice’s voice rings in his ear. Rafe rips her arms off of him shoving her away. “What the fuck are you doing?” He yells at her. He stares at her with wide eyes. “What are you talking about? I’m just doing what we both want.” She’s walking closer to him. He has to shake his head to see if this is reality. Rafe puts his arms up before she could get closer. “Listen I don’t know what you think is happening here but it’s not real.”

He’s trying to be nice, not waiting to embarrass the young girl or make things awkward. “Yes it is. I see how you look at me. It’s okay Mr. Cameron I want to fuck you too.” Rafe is utterly bewildered. What the actual fuck is this girl on. “Hey I’ve done drugs in my time but I won’t allow you to put my son’s life in danger just so you can get high.” That could only be the possible explanation.

Every conversation and interaction is playing in Rafe’s mind. There is no way he gave her the impression that he wanted her. She just laughs at him. “I’m not on drugs, silly. I just want us to finally get it over with. I mean you brought all of this for me, clearly you feel the same.” Her arms wrap around his neck. You walk in just in time to hear the last part of what she said.

He really played you. He made you feel crazy for your thoughts and here’s the proof. You didn’t have time to speak up because Rafe was yelling. “Get the fuck off of me. You need to listen to me, touch me again and you are fired. Matter of fact you are fired. We will no longer be needing your service.” He shoves her off him, his eyes filled with rage. “What I thought.” Candice tries to explain.

“I don’t want to hear it. You know my wife saw you for what you are. A nasty whore who tries to break up families. I’m disgusted even knowing I defended you because you are nothing but shit on the bottom of my shoe. Take your fucking money and never come back.” Rafe throws the check at her yet she doesn’t reach for you.

“Let’s see what that little wife of yours thinks when I tell her how we’ve been sleeping together. She’ll leave you and you’ll just have to stay with me. She won’t believe you when you say I’m lying.” She smirks as Rafe’s face drops. Thinking she won the battle she goes to step closer to him.

“I think she’ll know you are lying. Then fire you just like MY husband did.” She freezes and Rafe looks relieved to see you. “Mrs Cameron.” “Save it.” you cut her off. “Take the money and leave. We don’t need you here anymore.” Candice picks up the check with a solemn face. She rushes past you as she leaves, looking back at Rafe one last time.

When she is gone Rafe takes a deep breath. “I’m so fucking glad you were there. I was close to punching her in the face.” He breathes out. You just laugh walking over to him. “I wouldn’t have minded.” He gives you a kiss, looking at the bags on the counter.

“So much for a romantic night for the two of us. Even have your mom for overnight duty.” You smile at him, biting your lip and you look up. “Why don’t we drop Luca off and you can make it up to me. Since we already have the sitter of course.” You rationalize. “I like the way you think Mrs. Cameron.”

[skunkox]

"Until he gets tired of me."

That's was Darlin's answer anytime someone questioned their relationship with Sam. A pircing but deep pain would shoot through their chest every time they said it. But it was always said in a joking tone and a movement to distract the other person from their face.

No one needed to see how that thought may have hurt them. They knew what they were getting into from jump. Darlin' felt safe. Safer than they had felt in a long time. They found that safety in Sam and were grateful for it. Nothing is promised, and to have had Sam in their life at all was a blessing and a mercy.

As much as they hated the thought of Sam ever leaving them, Darlin' could never blame him. They'd fucked up so many times in their life. People had gotten hurt. They were reckless. In being so, caused Sam to strain himself to care and worry for them.

There were day they wished Sam would just pack up and go. To rid himself the headache of their presence. But whenever they woke, he was always right there, holding them close and tightly.

He'd never do that, though. It was obvious to anyone who actually bothered to see them together. The tenderness in his eyes. The gentleness of his touch. The vampire was beyond sprung for the wolf. He was happy. Like he was finally healing.

Sam wouldn't be going anywhere. Sam learned that about himself very quickly after the first couple of meetings. Darlin' knew as well. A part of their brain screamed to believe otherwise. They hadn't done anything to deserve his grace. His patience. His love. Love that was promised to them until the end of their time.

"Do you think Count Yee-Haw will stay?"

The question had been asked once again. This time, by a young boy named Carlos. He had gotten attached to Darlin' as a toddler and was one of the few pack members that was genuinely happy to see them back.

Count Yee-Haw was the nickname the the pack kids had given Sam. Only they could call him that, though. It was a name bestowed upon him after the collective decided to put his vamp strength to the test. The poor man was literally dog piled and left to hold and stumble around with a minimum of 8 kids hanging off his frame like ornaments. It was a title he was growing fond of.

"Probably. At least until he gets tired of me." Darlin gave the boy a half-hearted smile and pulled forward the hood of his jacket.

"I heard some of the adults talking. They said that he wouldn't stay when you get older." Carlos admitted, frown all too clear on his face. "It's stupid. He obviously loves you. And you're happy now. Isn't that enough?"

The words spoken came from a place of care. Carlos had missed his favorite rebel and defender of Asher's antics. Truth be told, he was worried Darlin' would become uneasy around the pack again and got MIA again. They were more stable with the southern vamp at their side.

Darlin' was about ready to hug the kid in an attempt to soothe his nerves. But a single thought ran through their head. Carlos was a sweet kid. But what he said was just a little nice? Too nice to come from a tween.

"Besides. I don't think you'll ever stop being weird. A d he already talks like an old ma-." Darlin' cut him short with a smack to the back of his head.

"If you think that, why even ask?"

"Because I know you hear them too. And I don't want you guys to go anywhere."

🦇🐺🦇🐺🦇🐺🦇🐺

If you read all that, I'm sorry.

Labeling this as part 1 cause I'm tired. Sorta been drained all week. Hoping to get actually rest this weekend and do a part 2. I have a habit of starting things and not finishing.

AO3 scares me, so small shit will remain here for the time being.

[dashofmonsters]

Dreamers & Delusions- Pt. 7

merman x female reader

"Would you like to move in with me then?" Tao asks.

You gape at him in disbelief of what just came out of his mouth before shaking your head, "Wait a second, wait a second... You'd be ok with me living with you?"

"Yes, that's why I asked." Tao confirms.

"Because you know if I agree to this and I move out of my grandmother's, she won't take me back and I can't afford rent in this area even with a double shift at the diner and all," you wave your hand about as you rant your concerns.

Tao nods and reaches for your hands, "You can stay here if you want. I would never, could never abandon a shoal mate."

You know he's being sincere, know that he'd never kick you out or leave you behind. But you're also scared, scared of these feelings that you have for him. He's your friend and you trust him so much that it hurts sometimes.

You want to jump up and say yes a million times over but there's this part of your heart that weeps at the idea of growing closer to someone you've decided is off limits. It would be torturous to stay with him, to be any closer than what you'd allow.

"Let me... let me think about it ok?" you finally say, poking the remnants of your cake slice.

"Oh... uh Of course," Tao stutters, sounding unusually shocked. "It's a big decision, I understand"

"Yup, for sure." you shove the piece of cake in your mouth and try and think of something else to talk about but nothing comes to mind.

There's a stretch of awkward silence that Tao eventually breaks when he takes a sip of coffee and nearly chokes on it. You jump down out of your seat to check up on him but he laughs it off. You can't help but to notice he's a bit dry to the touch, his usually moist and slightly leathery skin feels a bit scratchy.

"Tao, buddy, I think your overdue for a jump into your tank." you poke his arm and he looks down at it with a grimace.

He quickly hides his arm behind his back, his pointed ears have flattened like that of a cat's and he's backed away from me a good few feet.

"Should I not have mentioned that you need to rehydrate? Is that some cultural thing?" you ask.

Tao looks to the hatch and then at the floor and then the closet and then basically anywhere that's not you. He looks visibly uncomfortable and like he might run off at any second.

"Dude, you gotta talk to me or else I'm not sure what to do here." You sigh.

Without looking at you he nods and groans, "It is a cultural thing and it is a bit embarrassing to my kind... I am well hydrated, I just uhh missed a spot when I was scrapping off my dead skin..."

"Ok, no big deal then. Easily fixable right?" you smile at him, hoping that it'll help him be less uncomfortable but he still looks like he's ready to sprint.

"It is indeed a very big deal my friend, please excuse me." Tao dashes off and kicks the hatch open, and before you can say his name he's plunged right in. Water splashes up and around the living room floor and you're left alone.

The house in quiet once more but less awkward. Now that he's gone into the tank you're left alone with your thoughts and you're not quite liking them. If you had your phone you'd be texting Jess all about this, hoping for some sound advice. For the first time in a long time though, you're absolutely alone.

So you do the one thing that's always taken your mind off of anything and start cleaning.

You knew Tao's tiny beach house like the back of your hand since it's a pretty finite space and well organized. Usually he keeps his home spotless but since he rescued you he hasn't been paying much attention to keeping up with his house.

Lucky me, you think as you riffle through the cubbies of cleaning supplies under his kitchen sink.

Tao buddy, your house is about to be attacked by anxiety induced cleaning.

You attack the kitchen first, getting into every nook and cranny you can. At some point you get inventive in order to get the hard to reach spots as intrusive thoughts creep in here and there. A full hour passes and though your fingers are now wrinkled from being damp and your back sore from bending over in ways you weren't meant to, you continue on.

It's not till one of your wounds opens and blood drips that you realized you went a little too hard too soon. You groan and clean the spot off before holding a wad of folded paper towels over it. A makeshift bandage till you can find one of Tao's many first aid kits.

You look under the sink and in the pantry but you don't see high nor low of any band aids or antibiotic ointment. You run down the hall to the bathroom hoping you'll find one in there when you start to feel dizzy. You look down and see that the paper towel is almost all red.

Well that's not fucking good...

You're not one of those people who faint at the sight of blood but for some reason you've never been too ok with seeing a lot of yours exiting your body like this. You do your best to continue your search with shaky hands and a calm mind but your anxiety has other ideas.

Your vision blurs as tears sting the corners of your eyes and you do your best to hold back the pathetic whimpering but you crumple in front of the bathtub and cry as you hold onto your wound.

A small part of you hopes Tao won't find you like this and that you'll be passed out already but the larger part of you is hoping he'll get his tall merman ass over to you ASAP.

In desperation you remove the shirt you borrowed from Tao and start to wrap your arm with it but your hands are too shaky. You curse and cry and then gasp as you feel yourself being lifted up. You don't have it in you to protest until the cold water of the tub makes you yelp.

A soothing hand holds your shaking arm still as the stinging effects of the healing potion bubble along the wound.

"I should have warned you that this only acts as a temporary fix but doesn't completely heal the wound unless you use it a few times a day," Tao rubs his thumb against your hand, his voice is filled with remorse and worry.

All you can do is nod as you attempt to curl your body into a ball, both out of embarrassment for being pretty much naked in front of Tao and ashamed that he's seen you in this crumbled state. Being pathetic from nearly dying out at sea is one thing but being pathetic because you can't handle the sight of your own blood is another thing entirely, at least to you it is.

"You've lost even more blood, you must be exhausted..." His hand slowly leaves yours and pats your shoulder. "I'll be back with a towel and then I'll take you to my nest. Try and get some rest tonight."

Without meaning to, you start sobbing. You're completely inconsolable as you cry into your hands. You feel childish and Tao makes it even worse as he scoops you up into a towel a wraps you up. He holds you close as if you mean the world to him so you cry against his chest. You're a shaking shivering wet hot mess who is crying so hard in the arms of her crush that she starts falling asleep.

Your eyes sting with the salt of your tears and your throat aches from crying but you feel at peace. Like you can finally sleep without having to worry about getting you ass beaten for no fucking reason. You don't feel scared or on edge.

Suddenly the heat from Tao's body is missing and is replaced with a large comforter. He tucks you in and you whimper. He soothes his hand against your cheek and you turn into it and cry some more. You haven't felt this safe in a long long time nor this amount of pain and agony.

You hate to admit it, but you really like Tao... no, you're in love with him and this is going to fucking hurt.

~~~~~~

Your soul nearly jumps out of your body when you wake up to the loud clap of thunder. You jolt up and gasp as you look around in the dimly lit nest room. Your heart is beating a mile a minute and then it nearly stops when a very large hand plops onto your shoulder. It takes you a moment to realize that it's Tao's arm.

It takes you less time then that to realize that you're naked and Tao's large arm is across your body and rubbing up against your chest.

Tao groans and turns up against you as his hand slowly roves down to your hip, pulling you down until he's spooning you. And then, he begins to purr. His large cold hands absent mindlessly roam until one settles on your hip and the other on your shoulder. His mouth is dangerously clothes to your ear and his um... um...

Your mind goes blank because you've dated and you know what morning wood feels like and this... uh... he's either got a very big package or he got two very good size packages.

Right now, you feel as if you're both in heaven and hell being wrapped up in the arms of the merman you've finally admitted to yourself that you're in love with. Unfortunately, he'll regret this because you're not his mate.

You allow this to go on for a few more moments before you start wiggling out of his arms as carefully as you can before locating something you can wrap yourself up in.

With your now strapless blanket dress on you decide to tip toe to the kitchen for a quick midnight snack. You find the soup that Tao had made for you and toss it in the microwave while munching on some chips. Thoughts of the day and years past start to rear their ugly head as you stare at the spinning bowl. All your worst fears and nightmares circling around. You've told yourself you're not meant for love for so many years because if you were no one would have betrayed or left you.

And that's why you hate how fast you fell for Tao. You know he won't betray you or leave you without a damn good reason. He's been blunt and brutally honest with you to the point that it hurts sometimes. You trust him so much and feel so safe with him that it scares the shit out of you.

The soup pops in the microwave snapping you from your deep dark thoughts. You quickly clean up the mess while trying not to burn yourself on the hot bowl. You stir the lukewarm contents before shoving it back into the microwave, this time covered up.

You sigh and turn to head towards the fridge but end up bumping right into the rock hard chest of your heart's tormentor.

Like a bumbling idiot you jump back and nearly trip yourself up in the saddest attempts to gain composure. You obviously failed.

Tao sort of catches you, sort of pins you against the counter. Either way, you're both flustered and awkward.

"I uh... are you well enough to be walking around?" Tao asks as he helps you straighten up.

"Oh um yeah, just a little sore. Mostly hungry," you shrug and nod towards the microwave.

Tao nods his head and for the first time you notice that his eyes are all black. Not a single fleck of gold in them.

"Did you come out here for a snack too?" you ask as you start towards the fridge again.

You barely make it past Tao when he hoists you up in his arms and walks you to one of the bar stools.

"Oh come on, I'm not that bad off," you groan as he sets you down.

He glares daggers at you and frowns, "Need I remind you that you're still healing and that your wounds are only temporarily closed."

You want to joke or make some kind of snide remark but the incident is still fresh so you end up just curling into yourself. You gently clutch your sore and bruised arm and turn away from Tao.

Tao's fingers brush against your arm but quick retract when the microwave goes off. He takes the soup out and sets it front of you before going back to grab some rolls and pour you a glass of water.

You stare blankly at your food, your stomach sinking and appetite disappearing. You fidget with your fingers as your eyes start to blur from the heaviness in your chest.

Tao tries to reach out to hold you but you dodge his arms and slide off the chair. You're breathing is a little labored as you crumple to the floor. You needed more time before seeing him again, needed more time to compose yourself so you can continue lying to yourself.

You hear Tao talking a mile a minute, panic in his voice but once again his words are lost on you. You feel him get close so you scramble back, putting some dramatic distance between the two of you.

"Why are you running from me!?" he yells, the panic having evolved to pure distress and confusion. His black eyes are wide and his usually well kept hair is a mess and sticking to his face.

The bottle holding your years and years of pent up emotions finally shatters and without warning you cry out every frustration, every bold face lie you told to keep yourself safe, and every terror you've ever faced.

At some point you jolt up and start pacing circles like a mad woman, ranting and raving about your family, your jobs, your school, basically your whole damn life. You've told Tao bits and pieces but never the whole damn story.

You never told him that you almost died from starvation thanks to your estranged mother's fairy magic drug habits. You never told him how the girls in high school would lock you in the school over the weekends. You never told him or anyone how many times you had to lie, cheat and steal to keep your siblings fed since working in fast food hardly paid enough.

"The worst part is that I thought I finally fucking escaped my shitty ass family only to get tormented by my own grandmother on a daily fucking basis!" You shout, your chest heaving and your eyes now dried and crusted. "Who fucking tells their grandkid that their an overweight piece of shit? Who fucking does that?!"

It was a matter you used to joke about, something that you'd act like it didn't bother you but the truth is that it always got under your skin. You hardly got to eat anything decent growing up and now that you're all grown up you get to eat whenever and whatever you damn well please. It's not like you gorge yourself, but no one, especially your grandmother, should have any fucking say in your weight.

Tao slowly walks till he's right in front of you before crouching down. His hand slides against your cheek and he whispers some sort of spell that soothes the ache in your eyes. You crumble into his arms, truly exhausted now. He gently kisses your forehead before carefully lifting you up.

"You're safe here, you can rest," he tells you, his voice cracking.

You nuzzle up against him and his hold on you tightens. You always felt safe with him, it was an immediate thing. Like the second you met him you had this feeling deep down that you knew you could trust him.

Little by little you drift in and out as he walks you back to his nest room and tucks you back in. You feel him hovering over you before he leans in to kiss your cheek and then your nose. He slowly peppers your face in gentle and soft kisses expect he never kisses your lips. You can't help but to laugh before you sit up just enough so you can quickly steal a kiss from him.

It was meant to be a quick kiss goodnight before you pass out but that low rumble you hear from Tao catches you off guard and you get lost in the moment. He leans into you, holding you close. One kiss turns to two, turns to three and before you know he's lowering you back into his nest, lips still locked.

His large hand cups your face and you feel your heart pounding like crazy as your face heats up. You and Tao have kissed before, but not like this. He's kissing you like he actually likes you, and more than just a friend. He's kissing you like...

You turn your face from him and fake a yawn, "Oh god, sorry... I'm just-"

"Get some sleep," He kisses your cheek and sits up. "We'll talk in the morning."

You smile at him as he gets up and heads to the door. He nervously mentions that he's really dehydrated and it might be a bit before he comes up for air tomorrow. You wave him off and tell him goodnight before rolling yourself up into a ball of blankets and woe.

"I really fucked up..." you grumble as you clutch at your heart.

~~~~~~

Tao:

I really fucked up, I think.

I allowed myself to get caught up in my emotions and fell into her arms. I haven't even told her how I feel nor have I given her the space to heal.

Gods and goddesses I am the absolute worst.

I lament myself as I droop over a pile of rocks. I knew she had a tough upbringing and has issues with he family but I never realized just how much she was hiding. How long has she been suffering on her on?

She laid herself bare, screaming in agony of every sad story no one probably ever cared enough to listen to.

My heart bleeds for her, truly. For I know what it means to be alone in that regards. I had started opening up to her little by little. I never felt compelled to talk about myself but with her I feel safe enough to do so.

Suddenly my heart stops and I realize that's why she ranted for hours on end now.

She feels safe with me.

I start cursing myself in a similar fashion to my... my shoal mate.

The neutral tasting words leave behind a numb sensation. I can no longer call her my friend in private. It just tastes too awful. I can call her my shoal mate, it's a honest statement but it's still further from the truth.

When I held her earlier as she laid in my arms fast asleep I felt this need to protect her. It was similar to how I felt compelled to protect my shoal back home but there was more to it. I was anxious and every little creek or shuddering of the house had me on the edge. It wasn't until she rolled over and curled into me that I started calming down.

I started thinking long and hard about how to approach her once she was well and fully healed. I want to ask her if I could court her, tell her that it doesn't matter if we're not fated mates that my heart has chosen her. I want her as my mate and I can only hope she feels the same way.

But all that will have to wait a little while longer. She has more than just the physical wounds I must worry about. She needs to heal from the years of pain this world has wrought upon her.

I know she hasn't answered me on moving in but for her safety I will greatly insist. She cannot begin to heal properly if she's under the constant scrutiny of a woman who feigns love and concern.

I close my eyes and slowly doze off as I start planning her move and how she'd be living here and getting to work.

~~~~~~

Your everything hurts when you wake up. You somehow someway rolled into the corner of the nest room and woke up with your body curled in a way it shouldn't. You're well and tangled up in your blanket dress and something sort of sharp has left an imprint on your leg.

Ever so elegantly you toss around till you're free of your bindings and dig around for the object that left a deep dent in your thigh. When you finally find it you nearly drop it from shock. It's the crown your wore when you and Tao were dancing on the cliff. You remember leaving it here so your grandmother wouldn't ask you a million questions or worse, throw it away...

But why's it in here?

Maybe he meant to put it up somewhere safe and accidentally sort of just left it lying around, you think before quickly dismissing the thought. That wouldn't be very Tao of him.

You wrack you brain for a moment longer before you hear a knock. Turning your attention to the open doorway you see Tao's hand tossing a bag towards you.

"I woke up early this morning and it seems like the storm has mostly cleared up. I uh... I hope those are the right size," he clears his throat before excusing himself to the kitchen.

You scramble towards the bag and pull out the shirts, dresses, and pants and stare at them stunned. These were all designer brands and they all looked like they'd fit you perfectly. You want to try them all on, only problem is that you kinda wish you had some undergarments.

Picking up the bag to set it aside you feel that there's still some weight to it and see a couple of thin black boxes in there. You roll your eyes hoping that there's not over priced accessories in them or you'll have to chew Tao out for unnecessary spending.

When you open the first box your jaw drops and you feel your eyes widen to what it probably a cartoonish size. In the first black box was a set of grey and black lacy under things that looks like they'd fit like a dream. That being said, you quickly check the other box and see a black and blue set with a gold little details on it.

Your brain short circuits because both of the sets are Tao's colors. For a moment you start thinking that there's some weird hidden message here but knowing Tao who is straight forward you quickly abandon that thought. He probably just asked for help or something and they picked out sets based off of his colors thinking it's a gift for his girlfriend or some shit, you reason with yourself.

Feeling a bit more settled knowing that Tao would never gift you lingerie in his colors you set to trying on the black and blue one. As you thought, it fits perfectly. You toss on a simple light grey shirt and shimmy into a pair of blue jeans before gathering all the clothes he had gifted you into a neat folded pile.

You trot to the bathroom first before heading to the kitchen when you get the silly idea to go back to the nest room and put your crown on. You quickly settle in on your head and tip toe to the kitchen. You see Tao chopping something up but he quickly stops like he knows you're there.

"Did anything in that bag f-" He stops talking the second he turns around and his eyes widen and mouth straightens like he got caught doing something wrong.

You wave your hand at him, "Earth to Tao, you good buddy?"

He shakes his head and runs his claws through his hair before promptly returning to the chopping block, "Just fine... I uh see you found something to wear in all of that."

"Oh yeah, thank you by the way." You smile as you walk up to his side. "What are you working on?"

"I'm trying my hand at pastries. I gave up too soon the first time so I thought I'd try again," he shrugs, continuing his chopping of what looks like pistachios. "Oh and I... I made you some breakfast, it's on the bar."

You look up and see a crazy ass spread of every breakfast food imaginable. Part of you is confused but your stomach could care less about you being confused because you're hungry ass hell.

Circling around the counter, you make a jump start to the barstool and stick the landing as you grab at waffle and take a quick bite.

"Oh by the way," you pause to swallow. "You should return some of those clothes."

Tao stutters his knife and nearly slices a finger, "Did they not fit?"

"No, they all look like they'll fit perfectly it's just that they're high end brands... You shouldn't have to pay that much money for clothes. Like, I appreciate it, don't get me wrong... But this is too much," you look down and feel a bit of guilt for almost readily accepting these gifts.

You hear Tao chuckle and look up to see him shaking his head, "Believe it or not, I know what designer brands are. I bought those for you on purpose, no one ripped me off, and yes, I can afford to spend like this ever so often."

"But-"

"I'm not returning them," he looks down and swipes the chopped nuts into a bowl on the side.

You mutter something about how he should save that sort of thing for his mate and you swear you hear him grind his teeth. You quickly dig into your breakfast as you try to ignore the strange tension in the room. You notice Tao is acting a little off, not just with the clothes and breakfast but with his entire demeanor.

He seems more stern with you than usual and a bit more attentive than you care for. Your glass is empty for hardly a minute before he refills it with juice but somehow avoids looking in your general direction.

You try to ignore it but it's bothering you way to much, "Tao, buddy, are you ok?"

Tao turns and before he says anything you hold up your hand, "Because you've been acting really weird since I got up and please don't tell me this is because I trauma dumped on you yester because if it i-"

"It is, and it isn't," He admits and sighs as he tosses down a towel he was using to wipe off the counter.

"So what's wrong then? Are you mad at me? Annoyed? Is this... is this a pity thing? Oh gods please tell me this isn't a pity thing..." you start to panic and sprint out of the stool to the nest room.

Gifts are one thing but pity gifts piss you the fuck off.

Tao catches you before you make it past the bar and holds you in place, "I did none of this out of pity! I would never do something like that to you, I only wanted you to feel comfortable and provide you with the clothes of your own."

You feel yourself tensing, not used to others giving a rat's ass about your comfort without some sort of strings attached... But this is Tao, there wouldn't be a 'but' or 'however' or 'you owe me' added to his gifts and if he says he doesn't pity you then he doesn't pity you. Simple as that. Right?

"It just feels wrong somehow... I don't know why but it does," you slump. "Like I'm not worth the trouble of doing all this stuff for or getting really nice gifts."

"And who said that you're not worth it?" He crouches down in front of you, still holding your arms. His gold eyes search your face as he brings a hand up to cup your cheek. "Was it the girls who harassed their starving classmate? The mother who got high while her children suffered? Or the grandmother who shamed her granddaughter while she's healing? Because not a single one of those imbecilic curs has any room to speak of your worth nor judge you."

You feel your knees buckle and your eyes blur, "How can I be worth anything though? If I was, none of that would have happened to me, right?"

Tao shakes his head, "Your life isn't defined by your worth. You are not a commodity or currency but a person."

That's something you've always tried to tell yourself after moving away but it never felt real, never stuck its landing. But hearing Tao say it, verify that he knows there's more to you than what you can bring to the table just somehow settles you.

You fling yourself at him and give him the biggest hug you can manage that he quickly reciprocates. For the first time in forever, you feel seen. You feel safe.

"Hey Tao, buddy? If it's my day off you better let me sleep in." you laugh as you pull away, wiping the tears out of your eyes.

Tao sighs in relief and smiles, "So you'll move in?"

You smile back and nod, "I guess I should, I don't think I can go back to that hellhole."

"Thank the goddesses! I was trying to think how I should convince you to stay." He nervously laughs as he stands up,

"Honestly dude the breakfast kind of helped." you jokingly pat your stomach and he arches a brow at you.

"Really?" he tilts his head.

"Listen I was convinced when I woke up, breakfast just sealed the deal man. I'm a foodie!" You give him a silly pose and laugh.

"Oh I am going to regret some of this aren't I?" He rolls his eyes but smiles all the same.

"No takesies backsies." you grin.

"Wouldn't dream of it." Tao says and takes your.

[tomssexdoll]

I can't get enough of you

PAIRINGS: Bill 2011 x Female reader

CONTENT: ANGST + SMUT + FLUFF

SYPNOSIS: Bill and Y/N have a very toxic marriage, they fight over almost anything. One day he comes home late again and Y/N decides to confront him, when it gets heated, things take a turn...

A/N: HIII ALL, collabing with the wonderful @itsangelll, she is such a sweetheart and we worked so hard on this <3 I wrote the angst and she wrote the smut and fluff, I hope you guys enjoy!!!

WARNINGS: dom!bill, sub!reader, p in v (missionary), a lot of arguing and yelling, physical violence (not super bad)

Me and Bill were forced to get married, the promise of our businesses improving if we did. We obviously agreed to this, wanting to make as much money and deals as we could. Our marriage wasn't healthy or fulfilling at all, it was very toxic and bitter.

We had a lot of sex, mainly during the middle of an argument, we were both very stubborn and immature, not willing to accept our mistakes. We did have good moments, not all were bad, sometimes he'd hold me and tell me how much he loved me, how much he cared but his actions would speak volumes, most nights he'd be gone, coming home at ridiculous times, lying to me constantly, so did he really love me?

We had multiple fights a week, some even becoming physical, one got so bad that he nearly succeeded in throwing a chair at my head. We really did hate being like that towards each other but we couldn't help it, work was stressful and the pressure of being the top 1 mafia bosses in the world.

He came home late one day again, saying goodbye to all his buddies as they sped off, he fiddled with the door before swinging it open and slamming it shut. I was in the lounge, it was pitch black and I had a cigarette lit, my legs crossed. I wanted to scare him, to make him mad, anything.

As he went to walk up the stairs I startled him with my voice, "where the fuck where you Bill?" "fucking hell, don't scare me like that, why are you in the dark?" he grumbled, turning on the light, noticing my red, puffy eyes.

"Have..have you been crying?" he scoffed, "as a matter of fact, yes, I was worried fucking sick, what if you were dead on the fucking road and I didn't know?" I raised my voice, taking a long drag from my burning cigarette.

"Oh shut up, it's not like you give a shit if I was dead or alive, let me have fun, I've been stuck with you for a week for work," he went over to the liquor cabinet, taking out his aged whiskey and sitting in his chair, pouring the burnt umber drink into the glass.

"You're a fucking asshole, you know that right?" I glared at him, "oh trust me I know," he lit a cigarette as well, "you tell me every day, just as I tell you you're a bitch everyday," he gave me a sarcastic smile, rolling his eyes and taking a huge sip from the whiskey.

"I can't believe you just go out, stay out till 5 in the morning and come home and expect me to greet you with milk and fucking cookies, you are a pathetic excuse for a husband!" I yelled, "don't fucking yell at me, you drive me up the wall!" he yelled back, getting up from his chair and storming over to me, grabbing my wrist and pulling me up, towering over me.

"Oh you think you scare me? Nice fucking try" I snatched my wrist away, blowing the smoke in his face. He just stood there, eyes burning into mine, a certain rage taking over him.

"You are so fucking controlling, can't a grown man go wherever he wants?" he huffed, his chest heaving up and down in anger. "Oh controlling am I? Aren't you the one who gets mad at me for looking in a guys direction, beats up any man who talks to me, refuses to let me go out when I'm wearing something short? Oh yeah I'm controlling," I scoffed, shaking my head.

"At least I have good reasons, you're getting upset over me being out late, suck it the fuck up," he spat, his words cruel. "You don't get it do you? It's not the fact that you're out late, I don't give a shit do what you want, it's the fact that you never tell me where you're at and I'm sitting here at 4am wondering if i should call people to see where the fuck you are, sorry I give a fuck about you is that so fucking bad?" I rasied my voice, anger flowing through my veins.

"You make me so fucking mad.." he grunted, walking closer to me, narrowing his eyes at me. "Boo fucking hoo, you're a grown man aren't you? Learn how to deal with your emotions properly," I rolled my eyes, he grabbed me by my hair pulled me close, "don't fucking speak to me that way!" he yelled, inches away from my face

I pushed him off me, slapping him harshly on the face, "don't fucking touch me! Don't you ever put your hands on me again!" I screamed, "I could fucking kill you right now!" he yelled back.

"Shoot me then, fucking shoot me!" I yelled, vein buldging out on my forehead. We just stood there, silent for a second, both of our chests heaving up and down in anger.

Without another word Bill grabbed me by my waist and kissed me passionately, his tongue entering my mouth, searching for dominance, "you're so fucking whiny aren't you?" he muttered between kisses, hand hand roughly slapping my ass, I couldn't help but moan.

He pulled away from the kiss, a string of saliva parting from my mouth, grabbing my hand and taking me upstairs, he had a pretty strong grip, I almost couldn't keep up.

When we made it to our room, he threw me on the bed, towering over me. His dark brown orbs filled with such lust, wasting no time, he ripped my shirt off, then my jeans, leaving me in nothing but my black lace set of lingiere.

Bill groaned at the sight, a large tent forming in his pants, "you're so pretty f'me schatzi.." he said in a raspy voice, my breath hitched, my core getting even more wet. Even though Bill was sometimes a complete prick, I couldn't help the affect he had on me.

He unclasped my bra and ripped off my underwear, my nipples and wet cunt exposed to the cool air, a shiver went down my spine as he ran his fingers over my breasts. I whined, "don't be a tease Billy, this isn't fair!" he smirked and lifted my chin up, "does my doll want me to fuck her dumb, hm? Is that what you want?" his knee was rubbing my clit non stop, I could burst at any second, nodding desperatly. Bill, without any hesitation removed his belt in one swift move, his jeans and boxers pooling at his ankles, letting his cock spring free.

Even though we've fucked so many times, I could never get over how big he was. Bill swiped a finger over my folds, now coated with my arousal, "I haven't even done anything yet and you're already wet for me doll, you're just that desperate aren't you?" I couldn't answer, he snickered and without warning, he slammed into me, then pulling out fully before filling me up once again. I moaned loudly, the way his cock fit my pussy was amazing.

His hands made their way down to my waist, gripping tightly, bound to leave marks tomorrow. "Fuck, jesus, you feel s'good around my cock love, gonna fill this slutty hole with my cum" he groaned lowly.

Bill moved at a rapid pace, his tip kissing your cervix perfectly. Moans were spilling out of me uncontrollably, I was in pure ecstacy, my walls clenched around him every time he hit that gummy spot, the knot in my stomach growing tighter with each passing second.

"Mmm! Bill, fuck fuck! I'm close!" I whined, he moved his hand down to my clit, rubbing his thumb in fast circles, "cum in this cock for me doll," he whispered, pushing me over the edge,

Those words were all I nodded to hear, my legs shaking, bringing me over the brink. I screamed out his name, cumming all over his cock, "fuck baby, that's it!" Bill let out a low growl before shooting his cum inside me, thank god I was on the pill.

He collapsed on top of me, lifting his head and pressing a kiss to my temple, "you okay my sweet girl? Did I go too rough?" he said in a worry, I smiled, "yes, Billy i'm okay, it was amazing" I replied.

"I'm sorry about the fight earlier liebe.." he sighed, "you just mean to much to me and I can't lose you ever, I don't how what I'd do without you," I was in awe, "Billy..you aren't ever going to lose me, I promise you that," usually he was cold and bitter, leaving me to fall asleep on my own after fucking me in a fit of rage, but this time, he had a change of heart.

I took his hand in mine, kissing him passionately, I really did love him. Even though we were very toxic to each other, I didn't want to ever lose him, he's the reason I keep waking up every day, the reason I want to live life to the fullest.

He's always stayed loyal, always given me what I want, he may lack respect and love sometimes but we can work on it. "I really want us to change our ways, I hate fighting all the time, you mean so much to me," I whispered, looking into his eyes.

"Me too baby, me too, we can make it work," he smiled, sincerity in his expression.

tags: @itsmealaiah @itsangelll @kaulitzsbabyy @ella1289 @tomsonlyslut @ballhair @charliesgoodboy @ge-billsgf @bkaulitzlover @estxkios @miyukafujii

[lucyswinter]

༘⋆ ❅ Snow Day･:*:｡ ❆

pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!BAU!reader

summary: spencer’s coworker convinces him to skip an important meeting to play with her in the snow

genre: fluff

warnings: none!

(a/n): haven’t posted in a hot sec! even though it’s the middle of may, i was feeling cozy and decided to write a fic set in december. enjoy! (only briefly proofread)

“y/n! Hey.!” Spencer said as he turned around in his swivel chair to see a bubbly BAU agent moving quickly towards his desk. His face flushed pink, but he was sure if was just from the heating units they had been blasting in the office nonstop for the past week.

“Hey Spence!” she smiled at him as she skipped over to his desk, her skirt peppered with hearts swishing with her quick movements. Her cheeks were burning pink from the warmth of the office. She stopped for a moment to push her brunette hair behind her ears, adorned with cute earrings shaped like cats. “I know you’re going to hate me for this, but that grumpypants Hotch wanted me to let you know that there’s a meeting in the main lecture room in 20.” She informed him, an exaggerated look of disappointment on her face.

“Oh, thank you" Spencer said with a chuckle. He couldn't help but notice how cute she looked today. His eyes drifted down to her skirt that was peppered with hearts, and he felt his heart skip a beat.

“Mhm!” she dropped the disappointed act and grinned at him again before turning around and skipping to the other side of the room to talk to Garcia. She had on her skirt, and a blue cardigan with snowflakes on it, since it was finally December. The first snow of the season had just arrived, and her and Garcia were plotting to sneak off and enjoy some snow time.

As she left, Spencer let out a shaky breath. He couldn't stop thinking about her and how adorable she looked in that skirt. His mind begins to wander, and visions of cat earrings and blue cardigans danced through his head.

From across the office, Spencer could hear her chattering with Garcia about how to sneak out and what they would do in the snow. As unsuspecting as they were trying to seem, they were being much too obvious about their plans.

She could feel Spencer’s gaze on her, and suddenly the warmth of the office wasn’t the only thing heating her up. She looked from side to side before waving Spencer over quietly “Spencer!” she whisper yelled “C’mere!”

Spencer look around to make sure no one was watching him, playing in to her bit, and quickly stood up, making sure to tip toe for dramatic effect. He gave up after a few paces and proceeded to walk over to y/n and Garcia

"Yes, y/n?" he asked nervously. Not that she made him nervous- well, she did. But In all honesty he was more scared of what her and Garcia had cooked up.

“Okay so” she looked over to Garcia and giggled “We were thinking-“

“Who is we? You’re on your own for this one, sweetheart.” Penelope laughed, and y/n rolled her eyes.

“Anyways… I was thinking of ditching Hotch’s meeting to go enjoy the snow…want to join us? I mean…me?”

Spencer's heart rate sped up at the thought of being alone with her in the snow. He couldn't believe his luck.

"Oh um, sure. I’d love to join you" He said, trying his hardest to keep his voice from cracking.

Her face lit up at his response. “Great! We just need to make sure no one suspects us… everyone else would totally rat us out…” she told him, suspiciously eyeing Morgan, knowing he of all people would not find their antics amusing.

"I, uh, I may have a few ideas," Spencer said, his mind racing. He glanced around the office, considering his options. "What if” he paused for dramatic effect. “Instead of skipping the meeting, we...”

He was cut off by a giggle and a shush “Nope! I will not be talked out of this” she grinned “The is revenge for Hotch being such a frump and making us stay later on a snowy day!”

Spencer couldn't help but chuckle at her stubbornness. He found her confidence viciously attractive. He let out a small sigh, because he knew there was no point in arguing with her when she got like this.

“Alright, alright," he said, giving in. He was met with an eardrum shattering squeal and two hands grabbing in to his, connected to a body now jumping with joy. He smiled. “Let's go enjoy the snow."

She detached her hands from his to clap and let out another squeal.

“Okay, so, we both have to go out at different times. I’ll go first, then you. Okay Spence?” He nodded, giving her an awkward thumbs up. She grinned as she looked around once more.

“Alright.., see you out there” she saluted him, before getting up and not-so-nonchalantly walking out of the office and into the hallway. You could hear her pennyloafers clacking down the stairs until she finally reached the door and ran outside.

Spencer watched her leave, the smile not leaving his face. He glanced around the office, making eye contact with Morgan. He panicked and left the office, following quickly behind.

As he walked out the front doors of their building and onto the city streets, he saw her run out onto the snowy sidewalk and dance around in the rain of falling snowflakes. She had no jacket, so the small lumps of ice just collected on her hair and cardigan.

“Hey Spence, I caught one on my tongue!” She laughed as she twirled around.

He stepped forward out into the snow, his breath forming small clouds in front of him. He couldn't help but smile as he watched her dance in the snowflakes. He quickly took off his jacket and draped it around her shoulders before joining her on the sidewalk.

“No! I don’t need that. I’ll be fine. A little snow never hurt anybody!“ She told him. He sighed again at her stubbornness.

“No, really! I insist. You’re going to freeze to death out here! Actually, I was reading this interesting statistic about how last year, nearly 26% of all frostbite contracted was severe-“

“You look cute, yknow? When you geek out, or whatever.” She paused, cocking her head and making an confusing face, one which Spencer did not understand. After a while, she spoke again. “What’s your IQ?”

“187”

“Woah”

“What’s yours?”

“104…I think.”

They both stood there silently for a moment, the sound of cars beeping and sloshing in the sludge filled the air. This time, Spencer broke the silence.

“You called me cute.”

“Are you accusing me?”

“No just…just pointing it out-“

“Well, it’s true.”

She smiled softly at him. Her pennyloafers left shoe-shaped prints in the thin layer of snow that covered the sidewalk. She took a few steps forward, almost an arms length away from Spencer.

“We should go inside”

“Yeah”

They both stood there for a moment, looking at each other and enjoying the peacefulness of the snowfall. The tranquil sounds of the city had just faded into white noise. She waited a few more moments before she walked a bit closer to him, close enough to touch. She looked down and touched his pinky to hers. He shivered, but smiled and gave her a small nod when she looked up at him. She gave him a wide grin, complete with chattering teeth, and hesitantly laced her hand into his. He jumped at the feeling.

“Gosh your hands are cold.”

“We’re out in the snow, what did you expect.”

He just shook his head and chuckled, but his hand remained locked with hers.

“How about we head back inside. Before anyone notices us gone.”

She nodded in response, swinging their interlocked hands together for a few seconds before leading the him towards the front doors of the office.

(a/n): thanks for reading! ❄️🌨☃️

[alltheboysandgirlsiloved]

Chaos Theory review (characters' oriented review)

Since everyone is doing this, I thought I'd share my thoughts too because, to some extent, I feel like I'm in a minority here. In this post I'm going to focus mostly on the characters because there's a lot to say about the show in general and I don't have patience to write everything in one post.

spoilers under the cut

I said it yesterday and I will say it again: I absolutely loved Chaos Theory. It was action-packed, well-paced, dramatic and funny. It was everything I loved in Camp Cretaceous.

I'm especially grateful that they gave us a whole variety of emotions coming from all of characters.

I loved yasammy's conflict because it felt real and natural. Yas' PTSD being openly addressed was everything I hoped for (all of them have PTSD in some capacity but when it comes to Yas the execution was on the next level). And Sammy being fiercely overprotective over her girlfriend to the point it became too much?? That made so much sense because she had always been always protective but after the experiences in camp cretaceous, it is no wonder that this trait started to get out of her control. I don't know, it just made sense. I hope that in season 2 they go in detail about Sammy's family situation, I want her to talk about it with Yas. I'm really curious how it will play out and I can't wait to see Yas being super awesome supportive girlfriend.

I also really liked Darius and Kenji's relationship - I know, I know but hear me out. I actually enjoyed how the conflict(s) in their case seemed to keep piling up; they were growing like a fungus. I adored that little bit when Kenji mentioned that he stayed in touch with Darius' mother, while Darius didn't call her. I think it was incredible; such a small detail but tells you a lot about the years in their life that we didn't get to see.

While we are at it, I have to address the whole Darius and Brooklyn thing which I actually... didn't mind. I really didn't? And I don't mind that it was one-sided either. Maybe because it is the first (*cough*) openly addressed one-sided love story between the campers. I've always loved Darius and Brooklyn friendship, I genuinely believe that it was one of the strongest relationships in CC. It would be cool if they stayed platonic but really, I truly don't mind that one-sided love plotline. I wouldn't even call it a love triangle because to me it seems that Darius, to some extent, always knew that it was an unrequited crush, and I don't feel a sense of a privatization (between Kenji and Darius) either. You know what I actually liked about this situation? The fact that Darius didn't go to meet with Brooklyn because he was basically ashamed, embarrassed, and a little scared of his own feelings, of getting hurt. I feel like, in the long run, this is going to be incredible for his character development. Darius trying to run away from his own feelings to the point where he abandoned someone, where he tried hiding something from others? I genuinely think it added to his character and gave him additional depth. That's just my opinion though. I also think that even without that romantic plotline he would still call Brooklin after her "death". So to me, this really didn't change much other than adding more awkwardness and I had no trouble handling that (I always really liked visually the scene where Kenji and Darius were sitting in the bathtub. There was something pleasing about this)

Moving on to Kenji... Killing Daniel Kon so fast was certainly... a choice but. Kenji's reaction to his death was so well-done. It really highlighted the complex relationship that Kenji had with his father - someone he hated but who he also considered kind of a indestructible. His reaction was so heartbreaking and I was there for it.

And then there's also Ben. I'm gonna be honest - I am biased. I loved him before, I love him still so it feels unfair to write about him from my very biased perspective. Still - they could never make me hate him. I like how his character changed in so many ways but also stayed true to his core – he is adventurous and a little reckless (like a Jungle Boy that he was), and he is also soft and sensitive (that scene when he was crying when he was hiding under the truck broke me). I'm extremely curious about his background story that we barely touched upon - it is obvious that he had been living in that van for a while, which is interesting considering how he used to live on the campus and (let me remind you that) he has a loving mother that would surely support him if he decided to take a break just because he needs a break. From the looks of it, Ben seemed to be living on his own for a while – was his obsession with "being hunted" the only reason? or was there more? many questions. I am also a bit... sceptial about his girlfriend. The first time he mentioned her was not convincing to say at least, not to mention that apparently he had been living without his phone for a while now - were they talking online all this time or what? Idk, if he really has a girlfriend then first of all - the screenwriters are cowards, second of all - the relationship doesn't seem super-convincing for now.

Bonus: Mateo is one of the best characters introduced in the show, for me, he beats even Mae. He was perfect, actually perfect, I loved him. I really hope we will see him again in season 2 (above taking care of Bumpy) because I really liked his agency and his character arc.

Overall: I feel like your final review of CT depends heavily on what you tend to focus on while watching the show, and what you like in shows in general. I don't mind drama as long as it doesn't interfere with characters' personality. And I feel like a lot of choices they made in CT actually makes sense for these characters. I think it is also important to remember that this was - from what I understand - planned as a two-seasons long shows from the beginning which means that a lot of loose ends and decisions may not make sense yet but they will eventually be developed in season 2 (which would be awesome, we love consistent writing)

anyway, I only watched CT once for now, so don't quote me. I'm sure that I will have more thoughts later

[milliesfishes]

Hope you are having a GREAT DAY. Re read your fics multiple times omg. My ideas for requests would be either your take on a verbal fight happening with Billy and then the groveling and making up that comes after

Or reader witnessing Billy getting having to be violent and him worried that they’ll be scared of him now 😭😭😭😭

thank you so much bb love u you and billy have a fight fem reader x billy the kid

Your breathing was heavy, your hair tangled and skin sweaty as the waves of euphoria crashed over you. Tilting your head back, your arm fell over your head, breasts heaving. Billy, who'd been holding himself above you with his forearms, let himself collapse into you, his head resting on your chest.

He was sweaty too, and when he lifted his head, you saw some of his curls were stuck to his forehead. Billy smiled tiredly, taking your free hand and kissing the fingers. Then he rolled off of you, still lying on his side and facing you. Your eyes were fixed on the ceiling, but you could feel his on you.

Billy's arm found its way over you, thumb running up and down a little patch of skin. It was soothing, and you closed your eyes briefly, your heart still pounding.

His eyebrow quirked. Usually, you were so cuddly after sex. But today you were quiet, pulling the sheet up to cover your chest, one arm still flung above your head.

Settling in beside you, he kissed your shoulder, nudging his chin there. "You okay baby?"

Nodding, your eyes didn't leave the ceiling.

Billy sat up on his side, leaning on one arm and looking down at you, frowning. "Are ya sure?"

"I'm fine," you insisted, your hand fisting the sheet over your chest.

He reluctantly relented, despite knowing you weren't being truthful. Billy laid back down beside you, sliding his arm under your body and pulling you closer. Your position remained, keeping your arm where it was and your hand holding the sheet. He propped his chin up on your shoulder, exhaling softly, seeming to decide on telling you something.

"I've gotta leave again in the mornin'," he mumbled, looking over your face to gage a reaction. Your expression was unchanging, but you closed your eyes for a second, nodding.

Then, unexpectedly, you sat up fully, his arm remaining on the bed behind you. The sheet was abandoned, and you drew your knees to your chest, aware that your body was still bare. Your chin rested there, your hair falling over your shoulders and brushing your calves.

Billy watched you do all this before he sat up next to you. He'd known this would upset you. His hand came to your back, rubbing it in slow circles. "I know, I know I just got back, but I...I can't stay 'round for too long. These jobs Murphy's got us doin', they're takin' us all over the county."

You were numb to his explanation, and you turned to him, your legs falling flat on the bed, hands in your lap. "How long this time?"

He hummed, thinking about it, using his fingers to brush your hair behind your shoulder absentmindedly. "A week. Maybe two."

Looking down again, your fingers flexed. "And then what, you'll be back for another day and gone the next morning?" You'd known he was going to leave again soon. It had been on your mind all night. "You weren't even back for half of one this time."

He was surprised at you. Leaving as often and for as long as he did bothered you, he knew, but he hadn't known it bothered you this much. "Sweetheart...y'know this is what I hafta do. I gotta work, so we can really be together someday-"

"And what happens when we are together?" you asked, turning to look at him. "We'll always need money. Are you gonna keep leaving then too?"

Billy's hand fell from your back. "Where's this comin' from baby? Ya never had a problem with my work before."

"I'm tired of it!" the desperate words fell from your lips before you could think about it. "You leave for weeks then come into town for a few hours. It's the same every time. You ride in, send me a message, sleep with me, and then you're gone again."

Astonished at your outburst, he ran a hand over his face tiredly. "Dunno what ya want me to do baby, I can't control when Murphy wants me to go out."

Your knees bent again, and your elbows were propped up on them, your fingers curled into your palms and resting on your forehead. Eyes falling to the tangled bedsheets, your whisper was pathetic. "What am I doing?"

"Baby-" he shook his head, putting one hand on the side of your knee. One of his legs was bent, his other arm resting on it. "I'm trying, you gotta believe me. This is the best I can do. Murphy's payin' the best money I can get for my work-"

"That's not true," your hands fell from your face. "You told me about Tunstall."

"We've been over this." Billy sounded exasperated. "Can't leave the gang."

"You could though," you insisted, sitting on your knees now and facing him. "You could, and you'd be doing honest work for more, and you wouldn't be away so much-"

"Stop." His voice was firm, final, and you were taken aback. He'd never used a tone with you before. "Ya know the boys've done a lot for me. I ain't leavin' 'em."

"But you'll leave me?" your words were small.

Billy sucked in a breath frustratedly, shaking his head once, keeping it turned to the side. He closed his eyes and raised a hand to his forehead, rubbing it as he tried to compose himself. "Baby...I ain't expectin' ya to understand. You're too innocent, ya don't know the things I've seen-"

"Innocent?" The usage of the term was a barb. You looked up at him, your doll eyes worried. "But I'm not...I'm not innocent."

He turned his head back to face you, a confused frown gracing his features. "What're ya on about baby... 'course you're innocent."

"But we've..." you gestured down to the scene, to your bare bodies and messy sheets. His eyes followed your hand, and his face clouded with understanding, moving closer to you as he realized.

"Baby," he started, putting his hand on your thigh. The weight of it was warm. "Makin' love don't take your innocence away. You're mixin' up innocence 'n virginity."

"But..." you shook your head, crossing your arms over your breasts, feeling shy suddenly. "It isn't...it's not..."

"It ain't a sinful thing if ya do it for the right reasons," he said gently, rubbing your thigh soothingly. "It's a natural act honey...not a bad thing when it's with someone ya love. Like when we do it."

You felt stupid, looking down as it washed over you. It couldn't...it was so confusing. Everyone had always acted like it was some dangerous thing that would make you horrible if you did it. What kind of cruel secret was this? Making you feel foolish, making you feel like you should've somehow already known.

Billy could see your internal battle, and he tilted your head up with his palm on your cheek, his eyes reassuring. "Baby...the kinda innocence I'm talkin' about is in your soul. You're a good girl. Ain't ever done anythin' bad to no one. That's what makes ya innocent. And I love that about ya, okay? There's nothin' to be ashamed of. Not with me."

How he was saying it made sense, but you still felt embarrassed for not knowing. Your eyes fell from his face. He exhaled softly, seeming to know you were beating yourself up. "It ain't your fault you didn't know. Don't do that."

"I'm innocent," you repeated. "I'm too innocent to understand you?"

Billy winced as you recalled his words from earlier. "That was a poor choice 'f words. You just...you're...you're..."

"What?" you searched his eyes, worried over what he was going to say next.

Billy opened his mouth, then closed it, sighing. His shoulders slumped. He raised both his hands to your face, thumbs stroking the sides of your face, a half-smile turning his lips up slightly. "Beautiful. And kind. And good. You're my angel."

Your eyes pleaded with him. "Billy."

"You really felt like this the whole time?" he asked, concernedly tracing a finger down your cheek. "Musta been eatin' ya up inside..."

"It's fine," you shook your head, wanting to rid yourself of embarrassment. "It's...I..."

Billy sighed, clicking his tongue. The backs of his fingers pressed against your fingers, and he pushed your hair from your face. "All this time...you coulda..."

Could have told him. You couldn't have. Not with him slipping in and out of your life like a needle running out of thread, dipping over and under fabric. He stopped himself before he could say the rest, realizing his mistake.

"I don't wanna leave ya baby," he promised in a whisper, looking down into your eyes. "I hate it, ya know. Always feel like I'm usin' ya, sleepin' with ya and then hittin' the road again."

Tears pricked your eyes at his words. Because that was how you felt sometimes too, though you felt guilty for it. It obviously wasn't true. But that didn't erase the feeling.

Billy could see all this on your face, and his expression saddened. He leaned in, kissing your forehead. "'M sorry." He kissed your cheek. "'M so sorry baby." Then your other cheek. "'M sorry." Your nose. Then your lips, capturing them and leaning against you. "Don't deserve ya...I know that."

You sniffled, feeling overwhelmed. Billy noticed, pressing his mouth to yours again, his kiss gentle. He pulled you into his arms, his big hand pressing your head into his chest. It was then that your tears fell, everything swirling inside you like a never-ending storm. His lips dropped to the top of your head. "Kinda man am I, huh? M' sweet baby's cryin' causa' me."

A little sob escaped you, and he tensed slightly, rubbing your side. Now that your tears were falling, it seemed they wouldn't stop. Billy arm remained around you protectively as your body shook. "I know...I know pretty, I know."

"It's been so hard Billy," you choked in a broken whisper. "All those nights in between...some of them we didn't even talk, just..."

Crashing through the door. Kissing, touching. Waking up alone.

He nodded, squeezing you tighter and kissing your head again. "'M sorry sweetheart. 'M so sorry." Billy pulled you away slightly so he could look into your eyes, holding the sides of your face. "'M gonna do better for ya. This ain't worth it if it's hurtin' ya." He thought for a moment, resting his chin on your forehead as he did. "Maybe I can sit this next job out. Figure out what to do next."

Billy didn't make promises he didn't keep, and this whispered one against your hair lit a candle in your heart. "You will?"

"Yeah," he whispered comfortingly. "Maybe I can..." he exhaled, then nodded. "I'm gonna go talk to Tunstall."

You searched his eyes in disbelief. "Really?"

He smiled fondly, rubbing your cheeks with his thumbs. "Yeah baby. I shoulda done that awhile ago. The boys'll do just fine without me."

"It's a big change Billy," you murmured. Even though this was what you wanted him to do, you were worried about the repercussions. "Murphy-"

He shook his head. "Doesn't matter. He's gotta understand. I got my girl to think of." Billy nudged his nose against your forehead, then kissed it. "I needa keep the girl I got to think of. 'N doin' the long jobs he gives the gang ain't gonna help with that."

You smiled softly, throwing your arms around his neck, holding him close. "You'd do all that for me?"

"Yeah," he breathed, rubbing your back. "I was supposedly doin' these jobs for ya to begin with. But we're gonna change things up. Make it all better."

Billy kissed your forehead as the last of your tears dried. "It's all gonna be better."

[luna-lovegreat]

Legend sick fics you say 👀

Well I don’t think I remember too many sick fics off the top of my head but weathered and wavering by Quirkle is very good.

Once you have a collection please do share with the class 🫶

Hehe yeah. Here is the original post about Legend sick fics. I got a lot of recommendations in the replies and reblogs that are so cool- seriously I read a ton of them and you guys are so awesome (/gen)

@uniquevoidflowers wrote this fic for me which is amazing of course- it has some of the coolest imagery with a flower thermometer which makes me very happy

Pretty much all of @skyward-floored 's sick fics are awesome, including this legend one that was instantly recommended to me by quite a lot of people lol (since it was posted very recently) (go read it)

Fill the cracks with gold by @sister-dear was so fun to read, it might be one of my favourites for Four

I loved Hiding behind plaster and ceramics by @occasionallyprosie -it had a lot of takes I hadn't seen before and was also very good writing

@arecaceae175 recommended down, a nine chapter sickfic that is really good, I loved reading it.

There's a lot of other ones, and most of them are in the notes of the post I made:

@the-au-collector made this reblog with a ton of good recommendations, and @hero-of-the-wolf reblogged with one I liked. Idk if the links can work like that but we'll find out

And my wisdom tooth surgery went well :D I've stayed off the internet for a bit of recovery. I'm good I'm just not doing too much interacting when I'm tired *shrug*. I was scared because my health is always so bad but it was ok. :))) I have definitely spent a lot of time reading- I knew it was a good idea to ask for sick fics for surgery week XD

So that's the lovely list of sick fics I've been reading- for when you get your wisdom teeth out. Or you're not feeling well, or you just feel like reading. Anyways.

Also my mind is still pretty tired right now but I wanted to answer this- I hope it's ok for everyone I tagged, and my phrasing and language isn't good right now, sorry. Love you guys /plat <333

[sturnsbabie]

DEAR GRACIE

FINALE: THE SURPRISE.

pairing: dad!nate x sls!reader

summary: in which nate surprises sls with a special beach trip with him the kids and her family.

warnings: swearing,emotional,crying,fluff, smut.

wordcount:2.9k

gracie was now five months old and we were currently on a trip to the beach. nate randomly surprised me and my family with a beach trip.

we had been at the beach for about a few days now.we were staying in florida at this beach house that nate rented for a week.

i was enjoying the beach and the little vacation. a much needed break. just being around my family and nate.

rightnow we were all going out to eat as a big family. i was getting myself and gracie ready and nate was getting him and the boys ready.

“aww gray look how pretty you look in your little dress” i said and she giggled and cooed at me.

“mamas baby so pretty.” i smiled softly giving her a kiss on the cheek.

nate and the twins walked into the room. they all three had matching outfits on. they all looked so cute.

“hi mommy!hi sissy!” owen said and he climbed onto the bed giving gracie a kiss on the cheek.

gracie squealed when she saw owen. gracie and owens bond was so cute, they both loved eachother so much. owen was always wanting to play with her.

leo loves his sister but he doesn’t interact with her as much as owen does. he does every once in a while but not often but sometimes i catch him checking on her when shes napping in her room.

“hey princess.” nate said kissing me softly.

“hi baby.” i smiled as i was getting the diaper bag ready.

we all left and went out to eat. we went to some fancy steak house and it was a nice little dinner. we all just kind of sat around eating and talking about random topics.

once we finished dinner we all went back to the house and we had a little bonfire by the beach roasting marshmallows and making smores with the twins.

it was such a good day and now we were all just relaxing. i had gracie asleep in my arms and nate was helping leo roast a marshmallow. chris and owen were in the pool swimming. matt was sitting beside me and so was nick. we were just all talking about random topics and how nice this trip is.

suddenly owen and chris came running over to us. “mommy owie wan smore!” he said.

“have uncle chris help you make one baby. mommy has sissy asleep rightnow.”i said softly.

“otay mommy!”he said and ran over to where chris was sitting.

“cwis!!owie wan smore!” he said.

chris chuckled and grabbed the stuff to make him a smore.

“here you go owie!” chris said handing him the smore once it was finished and cooled off.

“fank ya unca cwis”owie smiled and ran over to me sitting next to me.

after we finished the fire nate and i put the twins to bed and we were now laying in bed cuddling as gracie was asleep in the bassinet next to us.

nate kissed my forehead as i was laying on his chest. “goodnight princess i love you.” he said.

“i love you too nate.” i smiled softly as i pressed a soft kiss to his lips.

with that we both laid there cuddling and watching our show til we fell asleep.

.•°♡°•.

NATES POV

i had been planning this for a while now. and today is the day its finally gonna happen. i was proposing to y/n, something i have been wanting to do since i first laid eyes on her.

i always knew it was gonna be her that i marry and have kids with. i knew from day one it was gonna be her no matter what.

she has been there for me since day one, shes always been my bestest friend besides her brothers. shes my first love. she means so much to me and i love watching her be a mom to our babies.

i dreamed of this life since i was younger,being with her and having babies with her. 14 year old nate would be shocked how things are now.

we went from making out in her bed all through freshman to junior year when we both were scared to admit our true feelings to us going to prom together and losing our virginities in the backseat of my car admitting our feelings to eachother to secretly dating for 7 months to everyone finding out, us getting pregnant with twins our senior year to us having baby gracie.

and now today i was gonna propose to the love of my life, i was absolutely nervous but so ready for this moment.

rightnow she was out on the beach with her parents and the babies. her brothers were with me helping me plan out how i was gonna do this. i wanted to make sure this moment was special for her.

i asked her dad and brothers a few weeks in advance before this trip if it was okay if i married their daughter/sister.

jimmy gave me his word telling me he trusted me with his daughter. justin also said it was okay and told me that he always knew it would be me.nick got super emotional when i asked him and told me he was also okay with it. matt was really sweet and gave me words of encouragement saying it was okay. chris was hesitant at first going into over protective brother mode and he got emotional and gave me a long talk and he gave me his word. marylou cried and gave me the biggest hug telling me that she knew this would happen one day.

“so how do you plan proposing to her?” nick asked as they were all sitting in the triplets room.

“well tonight after i take her to dinner im planning on taking her on a walk on the beach at sunset then propsing to her.” i said.

“i wanna have you guys be hid somewhere vlogging this moment and so you guys can come out whenever or if she says yes.” i said.

“of course shes gonna say yes nate! its sls were talking about!” nick said.

“yeah man go get your woman.” matt said.

“she should be coming back from the beach any moment to get ready.” i said.

“you’re lucky i approve of this because in my eyes shes still my little baby sister.” chris says.

we all laugh and head out of the room so it wont be suspicious.

.•°♡°•.

it had been a while and the girl was now currently in the room she was staying with nate in getting ready in the bathroom. she had on a white flowy beach dress and she was fixing her curls. she had on some light makeup and she was applying her lipstick.

nate was in the room getting ready he had on a button up shirt with some kahkis on. he had the ring in his pocket as felt himself getting nervous while getting ready.

after the girl was finished getting ready she walked out into the room. “aww you look so beautiful.” nate said walking over to her pulling her into a hug.

“thank you. you look so good” she giggled as she kissed him a few times.

“cmon princess lets go.” nate smiled softly as he led her to the car.

nate took her to dinner and they enjoyed themselves and just talked about their relationship and their babies.

now they were on their way back to the house. nate was extremely nervous but he was doing a good job at it.

before they left the restaurant he texted the boys so everyone could go hide so they can film the engagement for them.

.•°♡°•.

the two now got back to the house and were about to go on a walk on the beach. once nate parked the car he got out and opened her door for her.

“cmon princess lets go take a walk yeah?” he said.

“yeah lets go!” she giggled.

with that he grabbed her hand intertwining their fingers as they started walking on the beach.

“the sunset looks so pretty.” she said as they were walking.

nate chuckled. “youre prettier.” he said.

“nate shut up thats cheesy!” she giggled.

the two kept walking for a while til nate stopped her standing in front of her grabbing her hand.

he pressed a soft kiss on her lips as he felt his heart starting to race with what he was about to do.

nate suddenly got on one knee looking up at her as he held her hand.

“nate whatre you doing why are you on one knee!?” she said as she felt her heart starting to race as she got nervous for what he was doing.

“princess, you have been my bestfriend since we were in second grade. ive been inlove with you since i was eleven. my first love. my first everything. i love this life i have with you that started out with us sneaking around with eachother in highschool to your brothers finding out to us getting pregnant senior year with our sweet boys to us getting pregnant 7 months after the twins were born with gracie. you have always not only been my bestfriend but also the love of my life. i wouldnt wanna have it any other way. i love having you as the mother of my children. we are so lucky to have you sls.i love you so fucking much. i don’t want you to be my girlfriend anymore but i want you to be my wife. will you marry me?” nate said shakily trying not to cry as he reached into his pocket grabbing the ring out and showing it to her.

the girl had tears running down her cheeks as she was sobbing. “yes nate ill marry you.” she said.

with that nate smiled happily as he put the ring on her finger.

the girl looked at the ring and let out a loud squeal. “IM MARRYING MY BESTFRIEND!” she said.

nate picked her up and spinned her around as he kissed her softly.

“i love you princess.” he said smiling.

“i love you baby im gonna suck your dick so good tonight” she said.

“yeah you gonna have that 10k wrapped around my dick baby huh?” he chuckled.

“NATE 10K?”she said.

“yes baby you deserve it.” he said.

nate chuckled and put her down as the girls family came running towards them.

“IM ENGAGED!” she said as she had tears running down her cheeks as she hugged her mom and dad.

“im so happy for you baby.” her mom said as she gave her a hug.

“congratulations sls.” her dad said as he gave her big hug with her mom.

her triplet brothers were all hugging nate and congratulating him. justin was holding gracie as he was congratulating her. her mom and dad had owen and leo on the backpack leashes so they wouldnt run off.

chris came over to his sister pulling her into a hug as he started to sob in her arms. “im so happy for you. you deserve this so much.” he said.

“chris youre making me cry.” she chuckled as chris kept hugging her.

“mommy why u cry?owie don like mommy cry”owen said.

“mommys happy baby” she giggled and gave him a hug.

nick and matt both gave her hugs and congratulated her. everyone was so happy for her and nate.

they all congratulated and hugged her and they let the newly engaged couple spend the rest of the evening together kid free.

.•°♡°•.

nate and i were currently laying in bed making out as i was on top of him grinding myself on him.

i pulled away from the kiss starting to kiss down his neck as i grinded myself on him.i kissed all over his neck and jawline with wet sloppy kisses.

i leaned over and whispered into his ear. “im gonna suck your dick so good rightnow.”i said as i felt him let out a whimper.

he was already shirtless so i kissed my way down his body making my way to his happy trail as i pulled his pants down letting his dick spring out and hit his belly button.

i wrapped my hand that had my engagement ring on it around him as i spat onto his tip starting to jerk him off slowly.

“oh fuck baby.” he said as he watched me jerk him off.

i leaned down and took him into my mouth as i started to bob my head the same time i was jerking him off as he started to let out whimpers and swearing under his breath.

he started to squirm underneath me as i removed my hand taking him all the way in my mouth as i started to deepthroat him.

nate grabbed my head and started pushing it down a bit as tears ran down my cheeks from the pressure.

i had saliva all over my chin as i was giving him the sloppiest head ive ever gave him. he loves it that way and i love how much he whimpers and moans when i give him head.

“im gonna fucking cum princess” he moans out.

i pulled off of him. “you can wait baby.” i said as i started to stroke him with my hand making eye contact with him.

he let out a loud moan as i felt him start to twitch in my hand. “i want you to cum all down my throat baby.” i said and he moaned in response.

i took him back into my mouth and i felt him buck his hips as he started to thrust into my mouth as he was grabbing my hair.

i moaned against him as i felt him shoot his load down my throat. i pulled him out of my mouth swallowing every bit as i hovered over him kissing him.

“let me take care of you princess.” nate said as he flipped me over so now he was on top of me.

he slid my dress off of me leaving me in my panties as he slowly slid them off of me.

he pressed a soft kiss to my lips as he started kissing from my neck all the way down my body. he then leaned down spreading my thighs apart pressing soft kisses on my inner thighs.

he then attached his mouth to my clit as he started sucking on my clit as he slid to fingers inside of me causing me to let out a loud moan.

he held onto my thighs as he sucked on my clit like his life depended on it causing me to grip at his hair and grind myself on his tounge as he was fingering me at the same time.

“oh my fucking god nateeee” i moaned out as my eyes rolled back. i usually only gave head because i love giving more then receiving but rightnow this felt so good.

i felt myself start to clench around his fingers causing him to slide them out of me. “i want you to cum all over my tounge princess.” he said.

i felt him attach his mouth back to my pussy starting to eat me out as i grinded myself on his tounge as i felt my orgasm starting to grow closer and closer til i released my juices all on his tounge.

“fuck baby you taste so good.” he said as he pulled away from me as my arousal was all over his face.

“gonna fuck you so good.” nate said as he grabbed me putting me on all fours as i felt him rub his tip against my tip.

he slid into me as he grabbed my hands pinning them behind my back as i felt him deep inside of me as he started to thrust into me.

he slapped my ass harshly as he was pounding into me. “i love your ass so fucking much baby. love watching it jiggle while i pound myself so deep inside of you all you can think about is this dick.”he said as he leaned down kissing my back.

“hmphhhhh i love y-your dick baby!” i moaned out.

all i could think about was him pounding me til i couldnt take it anymore.

i felt myself start to clench around him as i let out a loud string of moans as mt orgasm was growing closer.

“g-gonna cum daddy!” i moaned out.

“cum for me princess. cum all over my fucking dick.” he said as he started to pound into me at a faster and deeper pace.

with that i felt myself clenching around him as i felt myself cum around him coating his dick with my cum.

he fucked me thru my high as i felt him start to twitch inside me as he started to go at a faster pace stopping and spilling his seed deep inside of me.

the two spent the rest of the night just enjoying eachother and their bodies celebrating their engagement.

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[dragunflies]

⤯ 𝐈𝐧 𝐊𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐲 ->

Ellie Williams X Fem Reader

omg, my first fic, eek! so scared lowk but I have so much saved in my docs that I need to spill soon. Ok, love ya, lmk what u think, constructive crit is welcomed per usual <3 ⚢

❦❧❦❧❦❧❦❧❦❧❦❦❧❦❦❧❦❧❦❧❦❧❦❧❦❦❧❦❦❧❦❧❦❧❦❧❦❧

  It was a cool mid Autumn morning. You sat there with the open window breezing against your flushed face and loose hair. It was an empty one-bedroom house, the cold air accompanied by the hollow walls made it eerie but relaxing. Wearing simply a baggy t-shirt and underwear you rose from the nest of a bed that formed while you slept. Although you snore, you sleep like a baby. With a head full of messy dark brown hair, a quick finger comb through your hair evens out the texture and density to some extent. Rolling out of bed, you crack your back, letting out a groan of relief, slowly easing your way out of your cozy bed. Come the fall time, the need for patrol hits its peak, most infected don’t stay out in the cold, so they tend to be the most active at the cusp of autumn.

As your eyes adjust to the light from the outside, so do your ears, the muttering of Jackson echoed through the neighborhood and led into your home. You reach for the hairbrush next to your bedside and try your best to aggressively claw out the knots left.

While you brushed and brushed your long hair, you heard the voices becoming more distinct. One specific member of the town, Ellie, became particularly known very quickly and very shortly. Her voice was raspy and stuck out quickly from the crowd; you could pinpoint it was her instantly. Not only did she just arrive a few years prior, but she was quick. With a quick tongue and a quicker fist, no one fucked with her. She was like a chihuahua, all bark and bite. Intimidating, but intriguing and sometimes weird to look at for too long. But oh did she piss you off, getting cocky and assertive in the smallest of tasks. She always insists on signing the postbooks, never shares her rations, and complains about hypothermia despite only wearing thin canvas sneakers. 

God was she the fucking worst.

Hearing all the commotion outside, you persist, throwing on a pair of jeans, a belt, and a long-sleeved black top, rolling up the sleeves to your elbows. As you get to the door, you swing on a pair of your best and only boots and slide into a pocket-ridden jacket. You searched for your lighter and handgun, striking the white lighter to double-check its usage. You then make your way out of the suburban make-shift home and easily make your way to Jackson, the city you grew up in. 

The leaves crunched below your boots as you made your way to the town center, where the majority of the town gathered that morning for the patrol assignments. Looking around you see familiar face after face, lining the circle surrounding Maria and the handful of men who surrounded her. Fortunately, you missed the entire meeting, but unfortunately as you have zero idea what the fuck you’re assigned to do. Surprisingly, Maria didn’t call you out like she usually does, by now she would've had your neck for being this casually late to a meeting like this, especially such an important one- 

“Y/n.” Maria states assertively, the loud chatting turning to a shushed mumble.

You look around trying to avoid the piercing eye contact but falling back into her stone-cold stare, it went right through you, sending shivers and goosebumps.

“Yes, ma’am?” You ask, never using such proper language when addressing someone, ever in your life, you shuttle at the look Maria gave.

Her boot steps sounded louder than they ever did before.

“This is the 5th time this month.” She barked, the surrounding crowd turning away and quickly sharing chatter with their cliques. 

“Yeah, I know, just trust me, I was in a rush, I didn’t even put my hair up,” You say, placing your hands in your pockets in the hope of hiding your anxious picking.

“I watch you stroll into the center all relaxed, you seem in no way of a rush,” Maria stated, her voice lowering as she raised a single eyebrow.

“Okay and?” Y/n mumbles, “Guarantee it wasn’t anything important.” 

She lowered her eyebrow, crossed her arms, and raised her head abruptly, “You missed patrols, you were assigned the post north-east of Kelly,” Maria’s lips curled, looking y/n up and down as she walked away to her office building, “better get packing, that’s nothing important, right?”. You could hear the smile form on Maria’s lips as she walked away.

Are you fucking kidding me? Kelly, the farthest post owned by Jackson, all because you missed one meeting? Not even just the Kelly outpost, the farthest fucking post all the way up in the peaks- oh my fucking god. 

Growing up in Jackson, you were trained for all different kinds of situations. Though you weren’t born here, it was where you learned everything you know now. Combat, shooting, hunting, gathering, and all the basics. Yeah, you weren’t always at the top of your class in everything, but you were a damn good aid. Knowing each medicine by its prefix or suffix, biology, and medicine is where you shine. Yeah, not combat, but you can survive, that’s all that matters. 

“Who am I posted with?” Y/n called out, a scoff leaving your voice as you exhaled, her eyes closed hoping for a big group where she could simply sit back and watch.

With Maria’s back still turned, she answered with a pause. “Williams, she has the experience you don’t, trust me, you won't be that screwed.” 

You stood there waiting for more people to be announced on your patrol. Nope, just Ellie. Fucking. Williams. 

With a groan of dissatisfaction, you turned around, looking through the crowds of people, with everyone holding warm mugs and staying clumped together, it was hard to find that short mother-fucker. You still couldn’t believe it, peering between each conversation, trying to find the auburn-headed girl. She was so obviously loud this morning, how could you not find her now, when you actually needed to get ahold of her. 

Suddenly, after walking around town center for a minute, you overhear a group of chatter, 

“I can’t believe Maria would pair you two up like that,” One voice echoed down an alley.

“I know- like out of all of us standing there, she picks y/n.” Another states.

“I’m fucked.” Says another. 

That was the voice. The raspy and obvious voice stood out so quickly to your ears.

You followed the group of voices, walking down a strip of self-owned stores, the in-between of the two buildings had voices spilling out of it. You walked closer, and upon turning into the alleyway,

There she was.

[things-arent-what-they-seem66]

I have a prompt request because I always want some Adamsapple angst and hurt/comfort. I was reading the posts about Adam having a miscarriage and I was thinking about him having his first miscarriage. Since he probably never saw Eve have one he would probably be scared when it happens to him and he becomes devastated when Lucifer explains what happened since he saw it happen to Lilith many times before Charlie was successfully born. All Lucifer can do is comfort poor Adam while cries over the baby he lost.

"How could this happen? This has never happened." Adam whispered these words to himself over and over as he was sat on his bed, knees pulled to his chest. He was currently wearing a baggy shirt and sweat pants, about an hour ago him and Lucifer got back from the hospital.

Adam had been bleeding a lot, so much so it was cause for concern. Lucifer rushed him to the ER only to find out that he was having a miscarriage.

That word shook Adam to his core. He wasn't so naive that he didn't know what it was, he's heard of people having them.

Eve never had one, why would he? Adam was literally created to make babies, it was his god given purpose in life and now apparently in death too.

If he couldn't even do the one thing he was meant to do right, what good was he?

The doctor tried to tell him that it was perfectly normal for something like this to happen so early on. Adam didn't take in the words, all he could think about was the baby he lost.

It didn't matter if it was the size of a grape, there was a heartbeat. And now that heartbeat is gone, he feels hollow now.

His womb was going through cramps, trying to go back to normal size. Just another cruel reminder.

A sob escaped Adam, he wanted his baby back.

Lucifer quietly entered their bedroom, he had been taking care of the kids they do have getting them lunch. He took the opportunity to make something for Adam in hopes he would eat.

When Apple asked him where her mama was, all Lucifer told her was that Adam wasn't feeling well and needed time to feel better.

He told Charlie the truth though. She was heartbroken for her dad and Adam. She volunteered herself and Vaggie to watch Apple and Lily for the rest of the day so he could be there for Adam.

Lucifer set the plate of food down on the night stand and moved to the other side of the bed. The sight of Adam like this stabbed him in the heart. It brought back memories from when him and Lilith went through this.

He removed his hat, shoes, and coat before crawling on the bed and wrapping an arm around Adam. "Love, is there anything I can do for you?" There was nothing worse than the one you love being in pain and you can do nothing about it.

Adam sobbed harder and buried his face in Lucifer's chest. "Turn back time."

"I would if I could, love. I'd do anything to take this pain away from you." Lucifer placed a kiss in his husband's hair holding him close. "Lilith lost hundreds of babies before we had Charlie."

"I'm not her."

"No you're not, thank god. But what I'm getting at, is the doctor is right these things happen. It doesn't mean you did anything wrong."

"But I-"

"Adam, my love, there is so much more to you than just being a baby making machine. You are funny, musically inclined, witty, the list goes on. I love you for all of you." Lucifer cupped his face. "We have been blessed with two daughters of our own, if we are meant to have more we will. If not...... Then that's fine by me. I want you."

Adam gave him a wobbly smile, eyes still full of tears and red. "I love you, Luci."

"I love you, too, hun. You feel like watching a movie? Even if it's just background noise." Lucifer offered.

"Will you stay?"

"I'm not going anywhere, my love."

[fruit-sy]

My personal thoughts on the major themes of Penacony 2.2

I was gonna make an entire Penacony retrospective and try to really dig into the whole story, but 1. I'm not that smart and 2. It has hours of footage and I don't think I'm strong enough to parse through that and form my own conclusions

so, just the things that really jumped at me and made me pause to think. I may do surface level research to make sure if a character really said this or that, but other than that, these are my thoughts fresh after finishing the quest.

Ok, to start off: Sunday and the road to hell

He's... god, he's such a complicated and interesting little man.

He is what I would call the embodiment of the saying "the road to hell is paved with good intentions". On the surface, he is trying to make a universe which is authoritarian-like. If you peel it back a bit more, he intends to make the universe a better place. But at the heart of it, I think he's just someone who is scared of pain.

There are 3 sequences I want to break down:

The Robin-Sunday exchanges before they meet Gopher Wood

This exchange has a lot of Sunday misdirecting Robin's points, but she calls out most of it.

Robin starts off with observing the dreamscape and concludes that dreamchasers shouldn't use penacony as a means of escaping entirely from reality. Because they won't overcome their demons. She asks if this can really count as "living"

Sunday at first seems to agree that things are not the way it should be. But there's a bit of misdirection on his part. He responded to robin's question by connecting "people using penacony as an escape" with (his opinion on) the way people currently "live" (which is what he was agreeing to in "things are not the way it should be"). He will then frame the narrative to show that people completely escaping through dreams is a good thing, and then will swerve to say how the "strong" should determine the future of the "weak".

Robin understandably does not agree with Sunday's narrative, because she believes that by staying in the dream (or MAKING dreamchasers stay in the dream), it will lock dreamchasers in stasis forever, making them unable to choose how to go about their future and overcome their difficulties. She then criticizes that no one has the right to determine whether a human deserves to live for a future or not.

There's a clear difference in ideology here. Sunday's devotion to Order is so strong because the experiences in his life had led him to believe that forcing his will on other people is the way to go. His ideology is rigid, cold, impersonal and is applied to all uniformly.

Robin firmly believes in choice and refuses to let an authority govern the way people should live. She wishes to unite people through her singing, and to inspire people to live. Her ideology is more personal, uniquely applied, and is idealistic and romantic.

2. The quiz sequence

An interesting thing about this sequence is the first two questions have quite reasonable answers. At the start of it, at least.

The first question is about nurturing and letting go. I think why most of the girls agreed to put the bird in a cage is because to do something great, you must first be equipped to survive. Maslow's bottom hierarchy, if you will. i think Sunday realizes this too, and puts it into some of his points to justify making decisions on behalf of other people.

"We must teach the weak how to live a happy life"

Though, the problem is that he twists this point so much and wants to force this on everyone. This is seen when he puts everyone on Penacony in Ena's dream. This disregard for other people's input kinda reflects how he sees the bird, in a way. The bird is something below Sunday, it cannot object his actions because it is merely just a weak, injured little thing.

It is here that he experienced pain of futility. The pain of putting in effort into something but have it crash and burn in the end no matter what. Afraid of that pain, he wonders if birds are meant for the sky if some fall before they can reach it. He has a very black and white mindset about this.

Either all birds fly and deserve the sky, or if even one bird falls then no birds deserve the sky.

The second question is about a person who is being pursued by the bloodhounds. Sunday is in a position of power, and has the influence to pardon the man. As a result, the man got away, forgot about his children, and hurt the people working under him in penacony.

Though, it's worth to mention that I think it's also partly the fault of the Oak family, who didn't try to discourage dreamchasers trying to find answers or solve their personal problems in Penacony. But I believe that's intentional.

Anyways, the crux of the question, if Sunday had known the outcome of his decision from the start and he had the foresight to think that Penacony isn't a place to search for answers, I actually think upholding the law would be the best course of action here.

I think this is where he developped his fear of... consequence. Because humanity has free will, they may use his pardon from the law to do awful things. This might be why he values upholding the law so much.

Another thing to note, I think Sunday hasn't gone off too far into the deep end at this point of his life. In a previous sequence with the same scenario, he actually questions what devotion to the Order would be like, and his doubts on its way of life.

"Who can judge the strong when their power hides their crimes?"

"Who can vouch for the weak when they will pay any price to survive?"

"Who can comfort the purest souls when even they get led astray?"

It's important to note that Sunday is in a position of power and emphasizes knowing the outcome of the first two questions.

The third question is the only question where he and the other party were of near equal standing. It's where he still hasn't made a decision, and which the outcome has not yet been decided.

Sunday cares about Robin's input and feelings. He cares so much he doesn't have it in him to force her to stay for the Order.

I think this is the crack in his belief of the Order. Because he cannot stop her from trying to fly. Because he cannot apply his law indiscriminately. Because it's Robin. His sister.

He has not made a choice, and Robin has not met her end yet like he's feared.

But he's so afraid of the pain of losing her. He's so afraid it haunts him in his nightmares.

After presenting the quiz, he essentially asks the main question of penacony: "Why does life slumber?"

He answers, "Because we are afraid to awaken from our dreams."

Interestingly, this is identical to Firefly's conclusion in 2.0. The difference is, Sunday thinks his answer is universal and will force his solution on everyone, while Firefly's is just her own personal answer.

Firefly asks what the price for Sunday's paradise is, and that made me stand up and point at the screen in agreement. Because what Sunday's aiming for is an authoritarian universe.

When an authority reigns supreme that it forces its will onto unwilling citizens, all in the name of the ideal society. That's a dystopia.

As Sunday said before, who will keep the authority in check? Who can ensure that the authority will not abuse their power?

That's what's so dangerous about an authoritarian government. You can't take the risk when it comes to this. You can't just give the power to one person, no matter how righteous or nice they seem. Because like the saying goes, give them an inch and they will take a mile. You cannot afford to cross the line, because when you do, who knows how far they'll take it.

Sunday clearly sees Firefly as someone weak, kind of akin to the bird in his childhood who needs his "saving". But Firefly does not appreciate someone deciding on her behalf whether she's weak or needs saving.

3. Ode to Order

I think it's important to note Sunday really frames Ode to Order in this angelic and holy way. Hell, the music even reflects this with a more bright and heavenly choir.

"Requiem aeternam" is a prayer for souls to reach heaven, eternal rest.

(A bit of a tangent, but when I saw this in the game I SHIVERED so hard. This is such creative story telling aughh- Like, using previously established game mechanics and twisting them to become something horrifying is SO COOL. What a delightfully terrifying way to illustrate what Sunday aims to achieve.)

This illustrates Sunday's paradise as a place where everyone is forcefully "tuned" to become a certain way forever. To be manipulated with Ena's strings without their consent like puppets into a picture perfect scene.

Though, I was confused why Sunday framed this ideal society as people abandoning the need for an authority, when it was something he was pushing so hard in previous sequences.

But my interpretation is that he will spread this message, of everyone being of equal standing, but leave himself as the true leader that will stay awake to ensure everyone else is blissfully asleep.

This really ties everything together for me. Sunday is someone so self righteous but self sacrificial that he's willing to put himself high in the sky, and be aware that he will be completely alone up there.

He is afraid of pain, and will do everything to avoid experiencing it ever again.

After experiencing pain, we shouldn't be scared of it. Sure, we can escape a bit to get some reprieve, but we must tend to our wounds so that we may not only survive, but live.

That brings me to the second major theme of Penacony : Nihility, and the feeling of futility

I will be breaking down Acheron's character first.

Self annihilators/Nihility emanators are so interesting, they are beings that slowly are losing themselves thanks to their own powers of Nihility. A predetermined end.

Living for so long + Nihility actively chipping away at her being is sure to make her memories blend in together. This is why Acheron values emotions so much, because it is one of the only anchors she can use to avoid succumbing to Nihility.

Her flashbacks with Tiernan are beautifully melancholic. Their exchange starts with Acheron pondering if the task Tiernan is doing is pointless, and if he should even bother? And if the end is expected, then should they change it? It's a bit muddy, but I interpret that here, Acheron is still searching for the meaning of Nihility, and Tiernan is the person who guides the souls to the other side of the river at that time.

In the next scene, Acheron states she's holding on to whatever she can to avoid succumbing to Nihility. She had journeyed with a Nameless girl once, who wanted to explore IX. But as expected, the girl ceased to be, but left with a smile. Acheron is scared of forgetting her memories with that girl.

The only other anchor she knows is of her promise to bring more warmth to other people, to a more hopeful future where she will cut off Nihility. She associates that promise and hope with the color of red.

The next scene mirrors the first scene. I interpret it as Acheron having found the meaning of Nihility, sorta embracing it, and is now guiding others to advance towards and depart the Nihility, with Tiernan having forgotten himself.

When Tiernan asks if what Acheron does is pointless, she gave the same answer Tiernan gave her, because some things have to be done. And she's come this far without needing a point, so why should she search for one?

"May death be the end of your boundless dream... guiding you back to the waking world."

I still cannot decipher the meaning of this statement completely. As far as I know, it's said 2 times. The first is after Firefly "died", and the second is in the above exchange with Tiernan.

In Firefly's case, perhaps the "death" refers to waking up from Ena's dream at the beginning, "boundless dream" is Ena's dream, and "the waking world" is Dreamflux Reef/reality.

In Tiernan's case, I can assume the "boundless dream" is his eternal unrest, as he's still lingering in the dead sea, not yet ready to enter the abyss of Nihility. The "death" may be referring to him entering the abyss, while the "waking world" is existence, as he finds his way out of Nihility.

To bring this all together, I think Acheron in this case represents and goes against Nihility. She presents Nihility as something inevitable and predetermined (death), something that awaits everyone, and something that everyone will have to embrace at some point of their lifespan (boundless dream).

But she also believes that one shouldn't wholeheartedly embrace Nihility. in the face of Nihility, we must do everything to take in the world around us and remember what makes us exist. She believes there is a way out of Nihility, and that is existence. (waking world)

In the face of futility, if everything really did have a predetermined end, I believe we should still try to make choices. Despite it being "pointless", I think that's what gives meaning to our existence. Otherwise, we risk succumbing to Nihility.

That's why when the trailblazer finally uttered their own choices, I felt shivers. One, because this shows the development of TB's character, and two because TB will do what they have to, they will never be content living in a dream, and they choose to continue in the face of "futility", despite the ending of their journey being predetermined.

In the face of futility, Sunday chooses to eliminate pain and choice out of the equation, only choosing to create a universe that's stuck in a mindless, blissful stasis. Because he is anticipating pain.

But sometimes, the anticipation is worse than the actual pain itself. He is also eliminating the element of choice, with the assumption that people will not be able to survive when they are facing futility.

But, Acheron's words really struck me.

In the face of futility, pain, and pressure humans may freeze in fear. But that innate survival instinct in humans might push them to fight and claw themselves out to save themselves. By removing the choice to fight for their lives, they won't have the choice to fight off Nihility.

To end this, I would like to go back to main question of Penacony

"Why does life slumber?"

And I think TB answers this beautifully.

"Because we will wake from our dreams."

Life slumbers to find reprieve from the harsh reality. But slumbering does not give us the solution to our problems, only recharging us to prepare for the waking world once more. And in the waking world, even if what we do is futile, we still have a choice in how we want to reach for the end.