#genderfluid fan is so canon

[anonymouscain]

for every time someone calls 8 my son I will inch my hand closer to the blend button on a blender while my head is in it

[andsomemaniacgotridofthewheel]

My big "How Neil Gaiman handles Happy Endings, Plot Twists and Immortal Characters"-meta-post is still in the works (as I haven't re-read all of his novels yet), but for the people who, after David Tennant's comment, fear that Aziraphale & Crowley will end up mortal:

Neil Gaiman has several characters who start out mortal and discover later that they are actually the child of a god or something.

He has several immortal characters who die. Some of them come back from the dead, some of them keep interacting with people even though they are dead, but none of them ever become mortal.

Also, basically all of his novels have happy endings. Sometimes, in the ones that aren't comedies, they are bitter sweet endings, though – and if you read the one in Stardust you will also have a great example of how things are not ending for one of his immortal characters.

You can witness the same inner integrity and logic of his characters when he talks about Aziraphale & Crowley's relationship and his never waving insistence that they are a genderless and sexless angel & demon, and not gay male humans; and that human experiences and concepts and conventions only tangentially apply to them, if at all. Yes, they love each other. Yes, they are queer in the sense that they like to present as genderfluid or gay male, and that their relationship is a forbidden one. It is not a sexual one, however, and he remains steadfast in this no matter how many people are yelling at him over the internet that that would make him a homophobe. (Yes, that happened. After both seasons. If you didn't see it, be glad.)

Because I've only read a couple so far I don't have the same experience with the works of Terry Pratchett, who famously plotted the ending with Neil almost two decades ago. But his characters seem to have the same inner integrity, and I don't think that he would ignore their very nature and force them into a conventional, if queer, romantic or sexual human relationship just to please a specific subgroup of fans.

So I think when David Tennant said that it might not be the ending they or we might want, he said that knowing that a lot of fans expect an explicitly romantic ending with Aziraphale & Crowley ending up in a human-like or even sexual relationship, some even expecting a marriage proposal or something like that.

And that is just never gonna happen (in canon). Their South Downs Cottage or Garden Happy Ending will be, if there is any human label that could possibly fit, queerplatonic.

[ingravinoveritas]

Following up on this excellent post from @nightgoodomens, it really is astonishing to see so many people in the GO fandom misunderstanding the characters/personalities of Aziraphale and Crowley. While I by no means am against people having head canons or differing interpretations, it has become frustrating to see people pushing their ideas about Aziraphale and Crowley onto others and declaring them to be official canon, leaving no room for any kind of discussion.

One of the things spoken about in the above linked post is the denigrating of Crowley, which seems to be a near constant in the fandom at this point, particularly in relation to the "apology dance" scene. (Which, to be fair, is chock full of soft!Dom Aziraphale vibes--thank you, Michael Sheen.) What seems to keep getting missed is that the entire apology dance routine is something that Aziraphale and Crowley do to each other. There is just as much of a possibility that Crowley sat there with a similarly smug look on his face and let out a guttural, snakey "Very nice" when Aziraphale did the dance in the years he listed off, because they play this game together.

Aziraphale and Crowley's relationship is one of equals, and I think this is also something people seem to not understand well. It seems as though a lot of fans who project themselves onto Crowley want to be taken care of, and so they want to believe the same of Crowley, and that the reason he wants to be taken care of is because he is broken. But someone doesn't have to be broken to want someone to take care of them. Sometimes the people who are a shambles on the outside can be dominant, just as sometimes the most buttoned up, put together people can also be submissive. And sometimes the people who look in control on the outside can feel not at all that way on the inside.

But this nuanced thinking seems to increasingly be difficult for many GO fans, particularly those who spend a great deal of time on social media, a place where people are either blindly praised or denigrated and torn down, and where such behavior greatly reinforces that binary, black-and-white mindset. We so badly want the world to be clear-cut--good vs. evil, heroes vs. bad guys--but very often that just isn't how things work. And it is exactly what Terry and Neil were trying to speak against in the GO book (and subsequently, the TV show).

The other thing that I think influences a lot of fans' perceptions about Aziraphale and Crowley is their chosen corporations (i.e., Crowley being thin and Aziraphale being plump). There is an automatic assumption that thin somehow equals more vulnerable, and for all of the emphasis that is placed on Aziraphale and Crowley being genderfluid/nonbinary/not subscribing to traditional gender roles, it's Crowley who seems to be viewed as more androgynous/femme, and is therefore looked at as inherently vulnerable. Meanwhile Aziraphale is thicker and viewed as more masculine, and therefore he is somehow inherently not vulnerable. Yet if the body types were reversed, it seems highly likely that fans' attitudes toward them would be much different.

(It also saddens me that this seems to mirror the fans' treatment of Michael and David, where Michael serves as a target for the fans' venom and is seen as less desirable/more threatening because he presents more traditionally masculine, while David is not targeted or attacked and is seen as more desirable/less threatening because he presents much more androgynously. Consequently, many fans find it easy not to sympathize with Michael, and when you can readily disregard someone's feelings, it becomes easier to see them as "less." In the case of Aziraphale and Michael, it leaves no room for either one to be vulnerable and is unfair to both of them.)

What I have always taken away from Good Omens--and from Michael and David's portrayal of Aziraphale and Crowley and how deeply they both understand these characters--is that Crowley doesn't need to be a perfect angel for Aziraphale to like him. He just needs to be a little bit of a good person. And Aziraphale doesn't need to be a perfect demon for Crowley to like him--he just needs to be enough of a bastard to be worth knowing. Neither one has to fully subscribe to the other's outlook or point of view to listen to what they have to say.

Aziraphale and Crowley meet in the middle. In the place that becomes their side, and where they take care of each other, fight with each other, and love each other. And that's more than most of us could ever ask or hope for...

[punkeropercyjackson]

"You're real fucking sweet but i gotta watch out,you'll burst my bubble,like strawberry POP!"

For @rinverse ' 1 year Atsv annivesary event and illustrated by @a-hypnos-v,my Spidersona:Nora Morales aka Earth 1610's Spiderwoman,also know as Gamespider!

Nora is the eldest Morales sibling at 36/37 with Jefferson and Rio being aged up to their 60s but he's not their bio kid because i'm black biracial instead of monoracial so he's adopted!His parents took him in as a 16 year old street kid who'd been kicked out for being trans,specifically transmasc genderfluid and bigender.The Morales fam are super supportive of him and always have been!!

He's super bubbly,goofy,silly,sweet and kind but very insecure due to his trauma which also included getting bullied at school with zero friends and never went to college because his neurodivergence made school at that level too hard for him(audhd,anxiety and mdd)and Miles having all the same ones didn't help at all.But he never takes it out on him and is super proud of him for how smart he is and they're best friends on top of being adoptive siblings!!!Nora's also really snarky and lowkey cheeky and a huge gamer and geek and actually pretty responsible with good self-care habits contrary to the stereotype because he's a black fem instead of a white dudebro who dosen't read Spiderman comics.His poor social skills made it hard for him to connect with people but he does have a few casual friends in Itsv!No real strong connection though,it's just people he knows well enough.I think it goes without saying but he has hidden anger issues and spiteful tendencies too!

His version of the movies is called 'Spiderman/Spiderwoman:Spiderverse' but would be dubbed Spidersiblings:Spiderverse by fans if he were canon!It's both his and Miles' story as the titulary Spiderman and Spiderwoman so they're co-protagonists and Across has him as the fem mc instead of Gwen

Into him worked at the diner Peter B and Miles talked at and that's why Miles took him to it and Jefferson is a househusband because fuck copganda

Nora actually got bit at work at the same time Miles did while with Ripeter and Nora's intro blends into his as their theme songs play back to back/mixed into eachother:Miles' is 'Sunflower' and Nora's is 'Strawberry Pop',a rap song about black womanhood and Nora's type specifically as it was written for him like Sunflower was for Miles and both have a few lyrics referencing eachother as the heart and soul of Spiderverse.They're open with eachother about almost everything and Nora partially helped raise Miles so he always looked up to him but stopped vocalizing it as he got older so Nora misenterpreted it as him not thinking he was cool anymore and it hurt but he didn't vocalize that either because he found it fair

Nora was close to Uncle Aaron too and had suspiciouns he was hiding something and there's a moment where he jokes that he's secretly a supervillain but pretends not to be to protect the family with a goofy expression and hand gestures and we don't see Aaron's expression on purpose for dramatics and angst sake

His Spider motif is the purple jumping spider so his power is super strong legs including beyond average strength in them and echanced jumping and the rest of his body is already thick beforehand due to age(and so he dosen't look ridicilous LMAO)

Peter B is his main love interest!They bickered a lot in Itsv due to the whole 'extrovert optismist vs introvert pessimist' thing but had relathionship development as they got to know eachother and worked together and ended up crushing on eachother.Nora was the first older trans person Gwen met so she instantly latched onto him because they clocked eachother and he was happy to be friends with her and mutual mentors for lack of a better term(i.e Gwen taught Nora about being Spiderwoman and Nora was a positive adult figure in Gwen's life who took care of and looked out for her).He gets along with Peni,Noir and Spiderham too and Peni is shoujo based instead of moefication bullshit so naturally her and Nora's pastel femme ass hit it off

What's Up Danger? is a Morales Siblings shared theme song and Nora gives Miles ressurances as much as their parents and Peter B do and Peter B himself helps Nora out in feeling like Spiderwoman even before he chills out.There's a scene where Nora devastates that Miles will never look up to him like he used to but will make a great Spiderman and Miles is shocked speechless before he say he just didn't think he needed to say it anymore and got made fun of for admiring his big sister so much by his bullies because he talked about him at school a few times and tells him he never stopped being his hero and that he's 'the most awesome Spidersister in any universe' and that's what gives Nora the confidence to really be Spiderwoman as they rush off to the collider after hugging tightly and grinning at eachother.Nora is Spiderwoman(male)and Miles is Spiderman(female)

Nora showed bits of interest in punk culture in Into and goes full pastel punk/afropunk between it and Across and that's where his suit upgrade comes in and Itsv!Nora dressed like an afrolatina grandma tbh while Atsv!Nora dresses like a baddie and a huge faggot(complimentary).Spiderwoman is frequently seen at riots and charity events and Spiderman accoumpanies him when he's not too busy with school shit.Also Spiderwoman dosen't follow the no kill rule just for the exception of abusers and fascists

Nora becomes even more parental acting post Uncle Aaron's death for obvious reasons and there's direct talk of him in Across because of how important he was to the Spidersiblings.As Spider(wo)man,Nora naturally has something going on with all adult MJ's(meaning yes 1610 MJ and 616 MJ but not Em Jay because she's Gwen's age)and there's a joke of this when they sneak into the Kingpin party with the Mjnora interaction that implies bisexual MJ who loves all Spidermans regardless of gender

Atsv has a rework of it's intro sequence with a speech by the og Spiderfam(Miles,Nora,Gwen and Peter B)and same for the actual art/animation in it and Nora is the first amongst them to discover Spider Society,followed by him and Peter B reuiniting in a corny romantic scene that's interrupted by Miguel and Jessica and it cuts back and forth to them and Gwen as contrast and Gwen and Nora have an equally tender reunion as she frantically tells him what happened to her in a meltdown and he comforts her as they make it to Spider Society.Nora excitedly says he can't wait to tell Miles about it until Miguel says he can't just yet and refuses to tell him why so Nora just gives up and follows along because he's so fucking annoying about it.The movie is extended to almost 3 hours and there's a lot of Nora and Miles bonding in Earth 1610 and Peternora replaces Ghostflower as the love story of the movie and Gwen and Miles are platonic to not feel like it's only a thing because they're the other two main Spiderpeople

Hobie and Nora did the Spiderman pointing meme when they first met because they're both punk Spiderpeople and acted like they'd known eachother for years after only a few days of friendship and Nora basically adopted Hobie as his little brother and pseudo-son.They're platonic t4t black love realness and Margo gets in on it too since him and Nora have a shared special interests in video games and other matching tastes and Nora provides a shoulder to cry on when Mr and Mrs Kess are being extra toxic.He also helped Peni post Canon Event to cope and could relate from his own broken childhood that turned him into an edgecase too at the time and Pavitr and him are beyond unserious together and Gwen lives with Hobie fulltime on his boat and Nora visits them often enough to parent them it's pretty much his second house

This earns Nora the nickname 'Spider Manager' since they call themselves the Spiderband and he's their mentor/caretaker(Also George Stacy is Nora's canon event cop /hj.MURK THAT NIGGA!!!!!!)

Punkflower happens and their dynamic is the same because they're already so romantically-coded but there's more scenes and expansion due to longer run time.Ghostbyte also is together but there's tension going on not due to antagonizing eachother but due to Gwen's fated death and Margo's self-worth issues in regards to romance because of the 'disposable black love interest' trope.I wouldn't say they're on the same level because misogynoir is a very real thing but i think it's a good angle to work with in-universe and i'm a black woman myself so i'd say it's okay for me to since it's my territory

Jessnora is REALLLLLLL THEY'RE SO FUCKING GAY.Jessica still has a husband and is pregnant but they're polyamorous so it's okay with him them being a thing and Jessnora is that one trope where they're both chaotic but one's classy and elegant and smooth about it and the other's just a fucking menace with NO fanciness to them.Noraguel is also real in an enemies to lovers and rather angsty way as Nora actually changes a lot of Miguel's views by working with him and making him spend quality time so he unwinds but he's still scared to loose everything all over again and Spiderman and Spiderwoman in the same dimension makes them The Original Anomalies and it's a long while before he connects the dots and is too blinded by his trauma to see reason.He knows he loves Nora too but Nora has no clue on his feelings or Miguel's and it's torture because he can't figure out why he's so important to him but nonetheless dosen't hesitate to beat his ass and come for his entire life

42 Nora aka Nora J(Junia)is Venom's host who ran away from home post Jefferson's death because it broke him and is a vigilante like Miles G but much darker in his plots and sourer and meaner.There's a horror movie based reveal in the finale where Miles thinks he's safe because his Nora is with him but he turns and reveals himself as Venom-faced but has no actual intentions of hurting him contrary to his terror and his actual Nora gets Miles G and there's a dual frame reveal where the 42 Morales Siblings say the same thing:'I'm Miles/Nora Morales'

42 Nora/Nora J is also known as 'Venora',Nora has the trans pin on his Atsv costume to match Gwen's room flag,all Spiderpeople have special move the others can't do and Nora's being able to hack with his webs thanks to being kinda a criminal to get by when he was a homeless kid giving him experience beforehand and Beyond has Nora helping Miles G get that redemption-healing arc so at some point he asks him why he's so insistant on caring about him so Nora responds 'I'm gonna save you even if it kills me.You're my sunflower too'

[averagetmntfan]

MASTERPOST!

(yeah I copy pasted it from the other acc, don’t sue me)

wassup! Finally, a master post! Am I right?

(TC*ST AND PROSH*PPERS DNI!!)

hi there! I’m Jayah! You can call me jj tho. I’m js here to post a bunch of fun art and maybe some animation stuff? And occasionally, fan fiction >:). I am GenderFluid, and I go by all pronouns. And my sexuality is lesbian! (But I am also aroace)

and my lil gay ass miiiiiiight be possibly maybe simping for someone rn..?? (*cough* a literally drawing)

I also have 12 roleplay blogs! @leontheluxuriousone , @wrecking-it-raphie @gayass-blueberry-mugman, @bendy-the-dancing-doofus, @koi-the-cosplay-boy, @improv-master-mikey , @ask-miss-maple-leaf ,@blue-masked-simp , @mikey-the-magnificent , @no-ditches-no-bitches , @candy-for-the-win and @ask-olive-huchers

my current hyper fixations are: rottmnt, tadc, TBT(trolls: band together/trolls 3), The great north, bobs burgers, the cuphead show, moon girl and devil dinosaur, amphibia, the owl house, tmnt 12, cuphead and mugman in General, KREW, poppy playtime, and a SHIT TON MORE-

btw I swear quite a lot on this, so if that isn’t ur thing, u should click off.

and here’s my sona ref!

DISCLAIMER: please don’t send me werid asks, or gross inappropriate content. I’m a minor.

100 DTIYS!!

• FANART!!: •

Leo goober(@ghosty-0w0)

PRINCESS KOI FR (@mikey-rottmnt)

MY BABIES- (@allyheart707)

MY SONS<333 (@mikey-rottmnt)

YOU MADE ME LOOK SO PRETTY RAAHHH (@mikey-rottmnt)

• ROTTMNT FICS!!!: •

The sand.

shopping day! (discontinued)

1 2 3

The 4 servants Au:

Chapter 1 (ongoing)

pt.1 pt.2 pt.3 pt.4 pt.5 Pt.6 Pt.7 pt.8 pt.9 pt.10 pt.11 pt.12 (currently on hiatus)

The 4 turtles work peacefully at a competing hotel with the battle nexus, with their beloved father. But one day, everything spirals out of control! And their worlds get flipped upside down! Follow Leo, Donnie, Raph & Mikey on the journey of a life time! And who knows, they might meet some friends along the way, or maybe more…

• DOODLES: •

Pissed off peeps >:[

brace face!!

• FICS: •

Colour theory thingy sorta??

• RANDOM STUFF: •

Leo being a dumb-dumb

• ANSWERED ASKS: •

what do the bros do outside of the hotel??

Mikey needs a hug

does raph break stuff often?

Do the bros like Lou Jitsu movies?

How do they feel about working there?

Time beats a dead man

(Collab au w/ @mikey-rottmnt!!)

Pt.1

A silly cuphead and mugman au Abt uh..a lot of stuff. (Heavily inspired by babtqftim)

• FICS/ INCORRECT QUOTES: •

picky eater

get served! ..or, maybe later..

portals gone wrong!! 1 2 3

Secret admirer<3

…?

the struggles of school

Is it salad?

THATS NOT WHAT I MEANT!!!

• HC’S that are canon in this silly au: •

Mugs

Cups and mugs (cups are not Canon)

How to hug the gang!!

• DRAWINGS: •

Human mugs doodles

chip and Dale!!

Koi and mugs being gay

KOI CANON IN TCHS?!

Rock paper scissors

• some lore: •

mugs lore

Hs! Mugs and euro…

Mug and cup lore

Main crews fav ice cream!!

cup lore (belongs to Ari)

Favourite drinks!

Pipsqueak!

(Coming soon..?)

“Small turtle, and even bigger problems.”

[midwesternvibes]

This one is currently winning on my little motivation poll so here we go

SEPERATED LEO AU!!! (because we don't have enough of those already lol)

Link to original post

So, I wanna talk more about how they all refound each other (link to how they met here)

Just to recap, Big Mama has Mikey, Draxum has Raph, and Splinter has Donnie. Big Mama's in her Nexus Hotel, Draxum is in NYC with a cloaking broach, and Splinter's in the ever iconic sewers.

Big Mama is actually a very kind mother to Mikey! She loves her little baby, and especially loves how he has her beloved Lou's smile. She spoils him to death and lets them express himself however she'd like. (If you haven't picked up on it yet, Mikey is genderfluid in this au and generally presents as a feminine man) Mikey absolutely adores skirts and zip-up hoodies, and usually wears a very bright suit top with a big orange ball gown skirt to formal events that Big Mama matches at Mikey's whims (I cannot draw for the life of me so if anyone is willing to draw this for me I will work out some kind of trade with you if you'd like 🙏)

But yeah, Big Mama does not let her fight in the Nexus, and has even toned down the brutality of the Nexus due to Mikey's pleading. There aren't any more lethal fights and she rarely makes binding, lifelong contracts because it made her baby upset to see all the sad and scared people.

They are a very cute duo and both genuinely love each other very much

Then there's Draxum amd Raph! Draxum luckily snagged two cloaking broaches before his lab exploded and slapped them on both him and his 2 year old son before heading up to the surface. The two of them then got a apartment in the.....*shuddder*........human world. Draxum tries to hide them in mostly secret, only leaving the house for groceries and necessities, but eventually realizes that poor Raphie is very lonely.

This is made so much worse when he meets the little girl downstairs and wants so desperately to follow her to school after their playdates.........Draxum finally caves.

With the help of Mr. and Mrs. O'Neil, he enrolls Raphie in the same Kindergarden as April and lets him finally go to school after years of homeschooling. Raphie struggles with the transition a bit, but eventually he gets the hang of it and thrives! Draxum encourages him to join as many clubs as he can (without getting overwhelmed of course) and is his biggest fan.

Once Draxum is able to settle down, he's actually a huge soccer mom and goes to all of Raphie's events, he gets totally embarrassed sometimes. Draxum and the O'Neils are really good friends and try to have dinner at least once a week

But once again, a very happy family! They struggle to show it sometimes, but they truly love each other and only want what's best for each other

Then we have Donnie and Splinter! Splinter was mutated with the DNA from his pet rat that he picked up on his travels with Big Mama and Draxum to get the turtles, and he was only able to grab Donnie and retreat to the sewers before Draxum's while lab collapsed. He, along with the other two, belive his partners and other children to be dead, so he never goes searching for them. Instead, he raises his son in the sewers on his own, foraging for all that they need just like in canon.

However, their sewer home is PREEEEEEEETY nice, since Donnie doesn't really doesn't have anything better to do other than make their home as nice as possible. He's has all major appliances working since he was 6 and only makes improvements from there. He also has his little pet project, but Splinter doesn't know about that yet!!!!

Speaking of Splinter, he varies pretty dramatically from canon. He's a lot less depressed because he had a much better experience with the yokai world and doesn't feel nearly as ashamed to BE a yokai (or yokai-adjacent) and keeps himself in much better shape, helping him with the dysmorphia that he does have. Overall, Splinter's doing pretty well, and he's a pretty attentive parent overall!

He was able to access some of his funds from his Lou Jitsu days and pays for Donnie to go to online school, and by the time Donnie meets up with the rest of his family at 11, he's halfway through high school work and has plans to go on to college so that he can start building up his tech empire by the time he's 18

But yeah, yet again, a overall happy parent/child relationship!

(Then there's Leo. All the angst had to go somewhere, right???)

Moving on! Now, the adults all lived separately with each of their respective kid, but when Raphie was about 8, he got really sick. Like, really really sick. Draxum went to as many human doctors that he could trust, but none of them were able to figure out what was wrong with his baby. He finally musters up the courage to go down to the Hidden City, and finds out that Raphie has Mystic Overload Syndrome. While he's running around trying to find stuff to help his little boy (he's so affectionate guys), Raphie sneaks out! He starts running around the Hidden City unbroached, and he feels truly seen for the first time in his life.

While running around, he literally runs into another turtle yokai, one who's dressed in expensive orange clothes...........

This post got REALLY long, so stay tuned for more! Next post will probably be how Draxum and Big Mama finally met, and then how Splinter and Donnie come into play!

(Don't worry about Leo this isn't about him he's fine)

First // Previous // Next

(Also stay tuned for the name reveal of the AU!

[curlybinghe]

huuuge fan of just. completely ignoring actual canon when i make headcanons. on account of 1) it makes certain people sooo mad 2) sometimes it gets me new friends and 3) if i want vash the stampede to be a transgender man it will be so in my own personal reality because hes not real. and that's pretty neat

here are some other examples of this

wei wuxian and xie lian are best friends

nicholas d. wolfwood is mexican catholic

yugi amane aka hanako-kun is genderfluid

jin ling's favorite uncle is actually wwx

the travelers from genshin impact are both black because i am

and on the topic, aeventi is the truth

shen qingqiu and shang qinghua do in fact fuck regularly despite both being married to their respective demon husbands

meryl, milly, vash, and wolfwood are ALL married to each other

remember that in fandom you can do whatever you want forever. peace and love! <3

[johannestevans]

Woe, Boypussy Be Upon Ye: Transing Characters in Fanfic & Fanart

What’s the deal with envisioning your blorbos as transgender?

Originally published in Prism & Pen. Also on my Patreon.

It’s a meme, I made it. Here it is.

It’s been unbelievably positive for me as a trans dude, the change in approach to trans characters in fandom and subsequently in media in general, and I just wanted to write a bit about my experiences with the cultural shift and how positive it’s been for me personally.

What’s weird about people in fandom confidently, nay casually, writing characters as transgender and just having them be a regular dude with a pussy or a regular girl with a dick is that like… I remember when it wasn’t a thing.

Back in 2009, for example, which was a big time for fandom — Superwholock was running rampant, Star Trek (2009) had just gotten a new generation of fans into Trek — or even in 2012, when Les Misérables (2012) had dropped and gotten new people into Les Mis, or when the Hobbit had revamped a lot of interest in Tolkien’s books and the original Lord of the Rings films, not to mention The Hobbit itself, none of this even getting into the Marvel movies, like…

It just. It wasn’t a thing.

Sure, there were transgender characters around, characters that people wrote as trans, but I remember it so strongly as being very niche. It was deep, emotional work where people had to work to “justify” the emotional work they were doing, and even then, they couldn’t just say a character was trans and be chill about it. In order to justify a character being transgender, one had to put in mountains of evidence, or admit the trans perspective was a genderbend of sorts.

For me, I’m pretty sure the moment when things started to change was when I was reading and writing a lot of Loki-centred fanfiction, roundabout 2014–2017 — and the more permissive culture was very much borne of Loki being seen as an exception.

Loki, of the Marvel film and comics, is an alien secretly kidnapped and adopted into the Odinson family, and is known to change his body and appearance frequently, including changing his apparent gender or expression.

He was, in the comic canon (not to mention the original Norse mythologies) quite genderfluid, after all, so even if you didn’t refer to him as explicitly transgender, you could explore him as being some variety of genderfluid, nonbinary, or intersex — as an alien, as a Jötnar as opposed to being AEsir like Thor or Odin, as a god.

But then things changed a bit more.

Welcome to Night Vale, a weird narrative horror podcast, started in 2012, and one thing you could rely on from a lot of fanfics is that people might have weird or alien or otherwise not-not cisgender but not entirely cisgender genitals either. The Magnus Archives, also a narrative horror podcast, started in 2016, and when I got into the fandom in roundabout 2019, which is also when the new Good Omens TV show was due to release and there was a resurgence of interest in the book as well, I remember experiencing a sort of newfound thing where like…

I’d had a mental block around writing many trans characters, before — I could create my own characters who were trans, but a big part of me still felt like I wasn’t allowed to just make a canon character trans if they’d never been mentioned as being trans before or made explicitly trans.

What was it that stopped me?

My own dysphoria? Perhaps a little. Maybe some lacking self-confidence.

Most of all, it just felt as though I couldn’t justify it. I couldn’t justify seeing a cis man written by cis people in a cis show and saying, “Hey, no, he’s like me, actually” — even though I could easily do it about the same character being gay or Jewish or even chronically ill or disabled.

It was like there was a mental block inside me I just couldn’t get past.

I still had a lot of the old online cultural expectations stamped onto me, I think, even being an out trans man who knew many many other trans and intersex and nonbinary people of every gender imaginable in fandom.

I think for Welcome to Night Vale and then especially for The Magnus Archives, part of what made it so easy for people to write and envisage different characters as trans, the fact that there was such limited physical description of characters, the fact that you were attached to them by their voices alone, allowed people to envisage them in whatever way they liked.

In The Magnus Archives, most of the main characters are envisaged as trans in one way or another — Daisy Tonner particularly is explored with all flavours of butch dykey complexity, trans in whichever ways or directions are juiciest and most interesting. But for so many of the characters — from Jonathan Sims and Martin Blackwood to Sasha James and Tim Stoker to Elias Bouchard to Peter Lukas to any of the other Entities — there is no end to the characters people will explore or envisage as trans or nonbinary or just straight-up outside of gender or gender-weird.

No one has to justify a period character being trans with no problems. Loads of people write Izzy Hands or Stede Bonnet or Edward Teach, as being trans in Our Flag Means Death alongside the canonic nonbinary character Jim Jimenez. Any and all characters, trans or otherwise, are invited to participate in ye olde top surgery performed by Roach, the ship’s surgeon, or somehow get hold of ye olde hormones in whatever handwavy way necessary, and it’s cool and fine.

And what’s wonderful for me is the way I see the current approach to trans characters gleefully and delightedly applied to fandoms that are years if not decades old.

I see people write House MD fanfic now where they just go, right from the beginning, yeah this or that character is trans, and they’ve always been trans, and it’s chill. What if James Wilson was trans? It’d rock, that’s what. What if Greg House was trans? Yeah, he’d probably do his own T-shots under the table.

People write Spock as trans now, or guys from M*A*S*H, or Jean Valjean.

What if in the X-Files Dana Scully and Fox Mulder were T4T? Makes complete sense, and also, the idea fucks absolutely. They’re already so lesbian vibes for each other, it fits perfectly.

I wrote a silly little Tumblr post a few weeks ago envisioning Morticia and Gomez Addams as T4T, and it blew up immediately — I think about how if I’d made that most a decade ago it would have been met with crickets, if not a bit of scorn, and not just from transphobes, but just people who like me at that time hadn’t been able to relax and have fun with it.

That’s the real crux of the matter, the impact a lot of fandom has made on me and the way that trans characterisation is approached, the hunger I have for trans characterisation now — it’s the idea of being trans as joyful and delightful, as inherently fun and sexy, but also just as being something every day and normal. A detail you can include as casually in your interpretation of a canon character as any other headcanon.

There’s a beautiful freedom in it, and I’m so grateful to have been able to learn from and grow because of other trans people paving the way with their confident headcanons and delving into trans ideas in their fic.

It’s done wonders for me everywhere — not just in my fanfic, but most of all in the original works I pen now, each one of them featuring trans character after trans character.

[runwiththerain]

an introduction to the marauders

for @gently-decaying-flowers

follow up posts will be made for the valkyries and skittles

james fleamont potter

also known as prongs

important canon information:

dead, died on october 31st 1981 defending his family from voldemort so lily could protect harry

his parents are fleamont 'monty' and euphemia 'effie' and we love both of them

his animagus is a stag

was head boy and a chaser on the gryffindor quidditch team

had a mutually antagonistic relationship with severus snape

fancast information:

original fancast was aaron taylor johnson

second fancast was reiky de valk

my personal fancast is gabriel.stewart

other fancasts include nickisnotgreen and thomas weatherall

common fanon traits:

is known as the sun and a golden retriever character, wears red converse, swiftie, quidditch obsessed, early morning riser who tries to force other people too (doesn't work), loyal, hero complex, hopeless romantic, mischievous and loves pranks, often is desi or latino, would take a bullet for anyone in his life, definitely strutted and is a therapist friend, has a hard time opening up

ships:

jily/sunflower/flowerpott: james and lily evans

jegulus/sunseeker/starchaser: james and regulus black

prongsfoot: james and sirius black

moonchaser: james and remus lupin

sirius orion black

also known as padfoot

important canon information:

godfather to harry and best friends with james

left home at 16 to live with the potters

was wrongly accused for the betrayal of lily and james

served 12 years in azkaban before using his animagus form to escape

his animagus is a black dog

was killed by his cousin bellatrix lestrange

fancast information:

original fancast was ben barnes

second fancast was undecided

my personal fancast is conan gray

other fancasts include louis seriot and eren m güvercin

common fanon traits:

drama queen, massive david bowie fan, rides a motorcycle, experiments with makeup, genderfluid, compulsive and mischievous, gay, owns and wears a leather jacket, he thinks his initials stand for son of a bitch, short king, gets jealous easily, no concept of personal space, mommy issues, daddy issues, family issues, pretty crier, french, likes to paint his nails

ships:

wolfstar: sirius and remus lupin

blackinnon: sirius and marlene mckinnon (widely unaccepted now)

prongsfoot: sirius and james potter

remus john lupin

also known as moony

important canon information:

his nickname of moony came about due to his "furry little problem" (being a werewolf)

in prisoner of azkaban he taught d efense against the dark arts at hogwarts

has a child called teddy with nymphadora tonks

was killed in the battle of hogwarts

fancast information:

original fancast was andrew garfield

second fancast was undecided

my personal fancast is p4perback

other fancasts include paul ahrens and matthew hitt

common fanon traits:

always wears grandpa sweaters, craves academic validation, best friends with lily, grumpy around full moons, loves chocolate, the mastermind behind all the marauders pranks, goes to a study group, is a massive nerd, tall but it took ages for him to grow, self worth issues, raspy voice, swears a goddamn lot, welsh and no one can understand what he says

ships:

wolfstar: remus and sirius black

moonwater: remus and regulus black

moonchaser: remus and james potter

moonrosekiller: remus and barty crouch jr and evan rosier

peter pettigrew

also known as wormtail

important canon information:

traitor to the marauders

was james and lily's secret keeper but ratted them out to voldemort hence resulting in their death

his animagus form is a rat

hid in his rat form in the wealsey family as 'scabbers' until discovered by sirius and remus in the prisoner of azkaban

fancast information:

original fancast was dane dehaan

second fancast was undecided

my personal fancast is lewis capaldi

other fancasts include maxwell acee donovan and jacob batalon

common fanon traits:

friendly and sociable, plant dad, needs validation, great cook/baker, indecisive, cheeky, amazing at chess, not the smartest academically, childhood friends with james and marlene, quick thinker, unintentionally funny, wants nothing more than to fit in, sometimes forgotten, has a really healthy dating history, sometimes has the best pranks and suprises the others

ships:

pebill: peter and sybill trelawney

unknown ship name: peter and james potter (usually a one sided crush)

unknown ship name: peter and remus lupin

partyvan: peter and barty crouch jr and evan rosier (this is mostly made as a joke)

[angelofd3athandd0gs]

When I say I can rant about the mf-ing Marauders, I MEAN IT.

All messages sent to my best friend after she made the mistake of asking if I could give her a rundown on the marauders:

"James Potter

-Harry's dad

-Also known as Prongs/Jamie/Potter

-Considered the sun

-Animagus is a deer

-Sirius' best friend and found brother

-Marauder

Him and Regulus are shipped because of the whole "best friend's brother" thing. Their ship name is Starchaser and Jegulus. There's two cause most prefer Starchaser

-The fancast is Aaron Taylor-Johnson

(Will send pictures with explanations later 😂)"

"Regulus Arcturus Black

-Sirius' younger brother (by one year)

-Slytherin

-Died by drowning because of the locket (5th picture) at 17

-Death eater by force

-Was supposed to be the heir to the Black fortune/house

He's shipped with both Remus and James. (I have a ✨️preference✨️)

-James is shipped with him because James is much brighter and well, more happier than Regulus is. Reggie is considered depressed and dark. (Starchaser/Jegulus)

-Remus and Reggie are shipped cause they're immensely similar. Both bookworms with anxiety and attachment problems because their parents suck (Moonwater)

-Also he's named after the brightest star in the constellation Leo"

"Sirius Orion Black the third

-Obviously my favorite. Totally couldn't tell right? 😂

-Marauder

-Ran away at 16 because his parents are ✨️abusive as fuck✨️ (the stars are cause he's watching me type 😂😂)

-Huge rock and roll fan

-Gay asf

-Genderfluid

-Was framed for the murder of his best friends by Peter Pettigrew

-Also known as Padfoot

-His animagus is a black dog. Very floofy

-Died at 36 due to the Avada Kedavra curse

-Killed by his cousin Bellatrix

-Harry's godparent

He's shipped with Remus Lupin because he's a clingy bitch. Also his name is after a star (like Reggie's) and Remus is a werewolf and his nickname is Moony. So moon and stars. (Wolfstar) also tall werewolf and short puppy is cute

-Named after the brightest star in the constellation Canis Major"

"Remus John Lupin

-Werewolf

-Nickname Moony

-Professor at Hogwarts

-Loves chocolate and coffee

-Afraid of the moon

-Bookworm

-Sassy"

(Ugh trying to keep these factual was so hard 😂😂😂)

"Peter Pettigrew

-Wormtail

-Not shipped with anyone cause he's a traitor

-Scaredy-cat

-Framed Sirius for murder"

"Barty Crouch Jr

-Slytherin Skittle (Like Reggie I just forgot to put that)

-Killed 12 people in cannon

-Evan Rosier's boyfriend

-Death Eater

-Son of Barty Crouch sr who's a minister of magic

-Used the polyjuice potion to change into Mad-eye moody the original Defence Against The Dark Arts teacher, teaching kids the crucio curse and traumatizing Neville

-Cinnamon roll with a knife addiction

-So very fucking *gay*

Shipped with Evan Rosier, James Potter and Sirius Black and Regulus Black.

-Regulus and Barty are Bartylus cause they're both Skittles. Plus Barty's very very out there and Reggie is very prim and proper so it's a well complimented

-James and Barty are SunKiller. Enemies to friends to lovers. Always. It's one of my favorites.

-Sirius Black and Barty are BitchKiller. Two out there twinks and they both have AWFUL parents.

-Barty's full name is Bartiemus but I'm sure he's very upsetable if you call him that

-He's played my bbg David Tennant in the movies"

"Evan Rosier

Tbh idk much about him 😅😅😅😅

-Killed by Mad Eye Moody

-Death Eater

-Slytherin Skittle

-Barty's Boyfriend

-Sassy mans

-Definitely a twink

-Somehow only shipped with Barty

-He and Barty are Rosekiller"

"Pandora Lovegood (Rosier)

-Luna's mother

-Psychic

-Sweet baby

-Ravenclaw/Slytherin, nobody knows for sure

-Regulus' best friend

-Shipped with Lily and Mary Macdonald

-Also called Panda

-Slytherin Skittle

-Miss ma'am should be an elf"

"Mary Macdonald

-I know nothing 🙃

-She pretty and obliviated herself

-Also she's shipped with Lily and Marlene"

"Lily Evans

-My baby

-Fiery redhead

-Sassy

-Bookworm

-Smart af

-Canonically James' wife and Harry's mum

-Muggleborn

-Remus and Sirius' best friend

-Definitely pansexual

-Very very pretty

-Shipped with Pandora, Marlene, Snape, James, Remus, Mary, Regulus and Sirius"

"Marlene Mckinnon

-Basically blonde Sirius

-Killed by Barty Crouch jr at 20

-Gryffindor

-Shipped with Dorcas

-Was supposed to marry Sirius before he went to Azkaban and before she was killed

-Her and Dorcas' ship name is Dorlene"

"Dorcas Meadowes

-Also a Slytherin Skittle

-Very close with both Marlene and Pandora

-Shipped with just about every female and it's kinda hilarious

-Somewhat close to Evan but we aren't sure

-Noone can agree on her fancast"

Plus some random messages that I don't feel like retyping. But my best friend went "Omg I didn't expect that"

Ma'am- Have you met me?? 😂😂 If it's a hyperfixation I can and will go on for hours if you let meee

Then somehow we decided sometime during that that I should rewrite the Harry Potter books and make them as gay as possible. So I am 😂 1971 on Quotev 😂 What If Series

[doberbutts]

Also the whole "if Mizu was a white woman you wouldn't debate her gender" no actually because the first instance I saw of a woman who had to hide as a man to survive was one of Tamora Pierce's Tortall books and Alanna's a white ginger who originally in canon was intended to be a cisgender woman who had to pretend to be a man and then Pierce reflected on what she learned from the trans community absolutely loving her female characters because they are so well written and said "yeah if I wrote Alanna today she'd probably be genderfluid and trans".

Note that Pierce does not say this about her other Tortall women- Diane, Kel, Ali, Beka, all of these are white women who defy gender roles and at least two of them do it very similarly to Alanna , but only Alanna is questioned by fans on being transgender or not, because the others are more clearly written as women than she is.

[lokiiied]

thinking about loki’s 400 year long stare at mobius when he says, “it’s about who”

and then how he looks at sylvie and says, “i can rewrite the story” and how she has her own story - without romance. how she told him to “write his own story” and how he’s now canonically god of stories/storytelling.

thinking about how if they make lokius canon, marvel’s first major canonically queer character will have “rewritten” the cishet centred narrative that a major audience is expecting and just how powerful that would be.

because, as much as i like the bisexual “confirmation” scene - it was very easy to look over if you’re a homophobic viewer or don’t know what bisexuality is. because they never had either of them say the words, “i am bisexual”. that and how they “dealt” with loki’s genderfluidity.

but a major gay couple?? with the healthiest and most intimate relationship i’ve EVER seen marvel write?? that would not be so easy to ignore. especially when you go back and see that it’s been there the whole time. if you knew what to look for. which, is honestly probably the queer vision in a nutshell. because cishets will be blind to anything if they see a man + woman option. they need “undeniable” proof. marvel knows that & it’s why they’ve gotten away with this. why they’re still “safe” for most of their anti-queer audience.

but just imagine, if loki fixes all this, get his friends back, and shows mobius know how he really feels and basically says “this has been the love story the whole time” THAT will be his legacy. in all the glorious i’m a god and i’ve been bad and i’m good and i’m queer and i have inherent worth just like everybody else and i don’t give a fuck loki fashion. and i hope to gods we get to see that.

that’s the story i want to see.

because if they turn around and give us sylki — (and in doing so say here’s a perfect example of a healthy gay relationship but instead we’re gonna give you a toxic genderbent selfcest romance) regardless of the fact we know they are both queer — that is not what a homophobic audience is going to see. they’re going to be satisfied that they didn’t see two men kissing on their screen and call it another win. and marvel would be continuing to encourage the idea that us queer fans are delusional - despite the clearly intentional writing.

not to mention the exhausting, intrinsically homophobic harassment & clowning lokius shippers have endured would actually not be for nothing if lokius were canon and marvel were to decide btw queer people are real and so are their stories and so is their love.

if the show about the genderfluid bisexual god of stories can’t accomplish that after all this character development then. idk.

[acoraxia]

Hello, good evening! Can you tell us random facts about your ver. of Erlang and Wukong? Just random stuff yknow--

OOOH OK i love sharing general headcanons and stuff (keep in mind most of this is for the LEGO Monkie Kid verse not JTTW or FSYY verse)

Erlang Shen / Yang Jian:

Middle child syndrome is strong with this one

He's much older than most other gods and deities that have been presented to us thus far because of the fact he had a mortal father and an immortal mother. It isn't until he fully accepts his role as the God of Justice and Engineering that he gradually stops aging whatsoever (rip to him, forever having to deal with backpains)

A funny gag I have is that he and Su Daji used to hold hands but that is mostly due to the 2019 drama series of Investiture of the Gods. He misses his wife. He misses her a lot Wukong :(

He has a habit of coming across as closed off/serious when in fact his head is completely empty and he is thinking about when he can go home

Watched all of Heaven and the world almost collapse and went, "Well, that's not my problem," and went back to taking his nap with XIaotian Quan

Doesn't like meeting new people

Has a soft spot for his found family in Heaven (Sun Wukong, Nezha and his extended family from Wukong's side)

Sun Wukong / Victorious Fighting Buddha:

"The Buddhist canon states that bodhisattvas can assume whatsoever gender and form is needed to liberate beings from ignorance and dukkha." genderfluid Sun Wukong is real y'all who says he can't have a fem form???

do you have any idea how hard it is to fully characterize this guy? goofy silly YES but also serious like he was during the book but also a terrifying demon king but also a kind god that protects people

he houses LOTS of yao in his mountain, takes in anyone regardless of who they are, but he makes sure they all do their part in taking care of the mountain even in his absence

technically lives within a mansion on flower fruit mountain but it's similar to his vault: magic door to enter and no you cannot enter if you are not allowed to sorry

i do not like how LMK makes FFM feel so SMALL like gosh dang it is a GIANT KINGDOM and Wukong loves all his subjects that live there

planted a garden for his generals, spider queen, macaque and lady bone demon

i always imagined lady bone demon and swk having a familial dynamic (all because of that ONE jttw live action show making them sworn siblings) and it explains his reason for being so angry at her during Season 3

he loves stone fruit, not just peaches, and they're his favorite thing to munch on (peaches are just everywhere because of the one peach tree he planted)

can beat up Erlang if he wanted. has threatened to do so. nezha hopes he keeps that promise-

Sun Wukong AND Erlang Shen:

became sworn brothers through the journey

Sun Wukong almost beat him to death after he learned that Erlang burned his mountain to death

they had a moment (think Invincible talking to Mark after beating him up) and Wukong apologized before saying he was angry and viscous and "you took my family"

they reconcile years later and Erlang proposes they be each other's family (as brothers) and Wukong spends time on plum hill before accepting

Wukong sometimes shrinks down to his younger self and clings to Erlang when he needs comfort

Erlang has a habit of worrying over Wukong far too much (he was an older brother before Wukong mind you)

Iron Fan prefers Wukong over Erlang

my personal headcanon that Iron Fan was not that close to Erlang during their time in Heaven as Erlang kept to himself or was just never fully there

DBK does not like Erlang!

[autism-autobot]

So apparently it's Pride Month now... what.

LMK Sexuality/Gender ID Headcanons

I did this for transformers last year and now it's Lego Monkie Kid's turn

Sun Wukong: Gay & Genderfluid (not projecting in the slightest, no sir not me)

MK: Gay & Trans (FtM)

Mei: Straight & Cis Ally

Pigsy: Pansexual & Cis

Tang: Gay & Cis

Sandy: Straight & Cis Ally

Macaque: Bisexual Demiboy

Demon Bull King: Bisexual & Cis ("someone big, strong, and handsome! LiKe AzUrE LiOn")

Princess Iron Fan: Straight & Cis Ally (she loves her family)

Red Son: Gay & Genderfluid (A Garden Across Our Collarbone got me hooked)

Tang Sanzang: Aroace & Cis

Sha Wujing: Straight & Cis Ally

Zhu Bajie: Straight & Cis Ally (used to be homophobic but fixed himself)

Ao Lie: Gay & Genderfluid (his Hair OMG)

Azure Lion: Pansexual & Cis

Yellow Tusk: Bisexual & Cis

Peng: Gay & CANONICALLY NONBINARY HOW??????

I love Lego Monkie Kid. Might make a part 2 for queer shipping.

[punkeropercyjackson]

Please reblog if you vote + You are NOT allowed to participate if you apply racist stereotypes to any of the characters,think Gwen isn't canon trans or erase Hobie's punkness.Denying transfem fans the right to see Gwen as rep despite her coding is overstepping and i'm an irl black punk who also familialy/platonically selfships with Hobie so fuck off if you're one of those weirdos who make him a misogynist or act like him being british means he's not as black as Miles/Margo/etc or any other bullshit.Please respect my wishes and i'll leave you be

@gummywormlimbs @honeypotsworld @insomniac-jay @julieemarine @floof-ghostie @nogender-onlystars @genderfluid-bat @leo-thecactus @cottoncandyspikes @moonage-gaydream @chessbox @pinkpinkspidey @transgnckon @ph4ntomed @askkakuro @zoeloveconvers99 @bemybabymp3 @mystiqdreamer @hairlice

[ilgaksu]

never a god (mysterious lotus casebook, post-canon, genderfluid li lianhua)

@difeisheng is a filthy enabler and my mum told me to tell them i can't have discord sleepovers with them anymore. they're also writing a ficlet in the same series and i'll link to it in this post when it's up!

*

The evening shift at the House of Scarlet Delights starts out just like any other. Li Xianghua wakes late in the afternoon, eats at the long table in the kitchen with the others, crowded in amongst girls still in sleep-clothes and others already fully made up for the night’s work, hair ornaments shimmering against each other like enamelled butterflies. Li Xianghua is tired, but it’s a familiar kind of tired. Still, he keeps his head down and eats. He inhales porridge with ginger and chili oil and lets his brain meander; painless, like floating. His body aches. 

“Huahua,” Xiao-mei asks, startling him. “Sorry! Huahua, do you have a comb I can borrow?” 

Her eyes are huge and pleading, round like a little animal’s. All of Xiao-mei is round to match, small and plump and plush with a matching mouth, and wildly, wildly popular with customers. She makes herself very hard to resist. Even as she speaks, she is always reaching out, twining some of Li Xianghua’s hair around her fingers. Against the fresh pink of them - Xiao-mei is barely twenty - the cold brittle white of his hair, like frost on an immortal’s mountain, is stark. Not for the first time, Li Xianghua feels old around her. Had he been so bright back then, too? No wonder Shan Gudao couldn’t stand to look at him. 

“Stop bothering Xianghua,” Weiwei snaps, from the kitchen doorway, frown etched on her face like iron, fan in her fingertips like Li Xianghua might have held a sword. “You know she’s had a long week, and here you are, hanging all over her like she’s your own mother. Have you no shame?” 

“But I missed her,” Xiao-mei whines, “And she always lends me things when I ask. Not like you, Weiwei.”

Weiwei sighs, crossing her arms and flipping the long braids of her hair over her shoulder. Even years of life in the Central Plains haven’t done their work to erase the signs of her first home from her; she still dresses like a girl from the plains, albeit one laden in jewellery. Weiwei purses her lips as she says, “Li Xianghua lends you her things when you ask so you’ll go away and stop bothering her.” 

Li Xianghua’s lips, despite himself, twitch. Weiwei, looming over Xiao-mei’s head, winks at him, so fast it could be denied, before dropping back into her ice princess act. 

“That’s not true is it, Huahua?” Xiao-mei demands, eyes now enormous. Li Xianghua inhales the last of the porridge, lips stinging with chili oil, and stands. In a previous life, he had to dodge girls like this all day. The dance doesn’t get any less tiring, especially when they’re sweet like she is.  

“I’ll give you the comb in a second,” is all he says. “I have to go get my flute now. We’re about to open.” 

He escapes. In his room - compact, not quite cramped, dominated by the bed, the chest of belongings, prone to steam from the girls’ bathhouse below entering through the open window but therefore always nearly warm - he dresses quickly, kneels and opens the chest. Inside, the flute is wrapped in a piece of red marbled silk, like the veins on a man just before he becomes corpse. The flute itself is beautiful, fixed along a distinct break right through it, like a newly fused bone. But the memory of the wound will always be there. Both of these things, silk and instrument, are from men before Li Xianghua became a dead man to them, each for a second time, and now, what is he? In the polished bronze of the mirror on a low table nearby, pushed right back against the wall and partially obscured by a medicine chest, he catches a glimpse of himself: hair fever-white, robes a dark green like mulch, and face painted like a heroine in a story. 

The story is over, and what he is, is what is left alive.  

He selects a comb at random from the splay of them on the table and leaves. 

And so, the first hour is peaceful. Usual, even. Xiao-mei is embarrassingly grateful, even holds her breath as Li Xianghua helps fit the teeth of it firmer into her hair. Li Xianghua ignores this. Li Xiangua focuses on his work. He kneels on a dais at one end of the main room, head bowed, and plays for the incoming flux of customers, all lilting songs that suggest yearning over satisfaction. It helps encourage them to stop drinking and go upstairs. This, too, is peaceful; usual. Li Xianghua focuses on his breathing and the music and the world melts around him, and then he gets paid for it. It’s a good life, as they go.  

However, once that first hour passes, this - the music, the brothel, the sanctuary - is interrupted, when a man in lilac, shimmering robes and hair tied up high and away from his face strides in, still no subtlety about him in sight. There is shock, certainly, but then comes with it an immediate wave of resignation, so much more muted than dread. What is a shadow meant to do in the face of unyielding light but dissolve? It’s the way of things. Li Xianghua watches, resisting the urge to laugh or scream or distract or sprint away, any of it, anything at all, as the man, still boyish about the face with it too, reaches into his robes and removes a wooden badge. 

“My name,” he says, voice as clear as a bell and just as headache-inducing in prolonged succession, “is Fang Duobing, and I’m a detective of Baichuan Court. I’m here to investigate the disappearance of Cai-daren's son.”

Li Xianghua resists the urge to roll his eyes. He keeps them half-down, instead, inspecting up from beneath his eyelashes. He shifts one hand, slightly, to try and cover the mended crack in the flute. But something about the minute movement must alert Fang Duobing, because he turns like a fox scenting blood, stares directly at Li Xianghua. He blinks. He gapes. His gaze drops to the flute, fixes for a deadly beat, and then rises back to Li Xianghua’s face. He tries to make a sound, but no sound comes, the bell cut out or cut down or shattered on the spot, and Li Xianghua, Li Xianghua who was twice a dead man but only, until this moment, once resurrected, looks back at him and thinks - 

Well, fuck.      

[read this on ao3]

[read ash's ficlet here]