#glasses riddle..

[skyephobic]

studying :3

[block-swing-perry]

really abridged version of the latest chapter of the fic At My Worst cause that really hit me in the feels

[yukiire]

Happy (very Belated days late) Lunar New Year- or Valentine's Day

outfit is from a merch collab!

[baranedizille]

something something sweet

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Steal Your Heart (Part 1)

When the calling card of the infamous Knave of Hearts arrives, he’ll rob his victims blind of their most treasured items on the appointed date. Enter ace detective Yuu accompanied by rookie cop Deuce Spade, both seeking to apprehend the Knave and bring him to justice.

Will they succeed, or will the phantom thief steal their valuables--and their hearts--first?

This was originally meant to be one fic, but it was getting to be WAY too long. I decided to split it in half and release this part now and the second part (which I am still working on!) later. This first part focuses more on Yuu and Deuce; the second part will be more Yuu and Ace.

(Please note: there are slight romantic implications in the form of an Ace/Yuu/Deuce love triangle, but those elements could also be interpreted as platonic or as just playful teasing with no additional meaning. It’s all in the eyes of the reader!)

Imagine this...

The police station’s waiting room was a familiar sight.

With time, the shiny checkered floor had grown matte, marred with scratches and scuffs from the boots that crossed it on a daily basis. Someone had taken to attempt to pretty up the otherwise dull space by hanging out abstract paintings on the cream-colored walls, and a vase of white roses dripping with red paint at the check-in desk. There was as even a glass tank which housed a small family of colorful hedgehogs.

Maybe they were meant to be welcoming—but really, they were more clashing than anything. Certainly not a fit for the stiff atmosphere of the station.

Still the fluorescent lightbulbs buzzed faintly, flickering in and out on occasion. The sound distracted from the old television mounted in a corner to entertain guests. It seemed to play commercials on a loop more often than it played actual shows. Currently, an Olympus Corp. branded tablet was being toted as the next big technological marvel—though the TV’s audio was fuzzy at best, and the image half static.

A coffee table pushed to the wall, stacked with a new stash of magazines. Whoever updated the reading materials—most likely the friendly senior officer with orange waves for hair—was into the latest trends, often selecting fashion magazines with high gloss finishes. A dangerously beautiful man graced the covers of many of them, dressed in the hottest summertime styles while looking the part of an untouchable ice queen.

As usual, the station was scented with coffee and tea, the beverages of choice for many officers burning the midnight oil or working overtime. The chief demanded it at times to meet deadlines and goals—he was such a stickler for them—and the caffeine helped those under him stay sane as they went about their duties.

In the afternoons, most were either out on lunch or on patrol, lessening the foot traffic at HQ. There was only one man in uniform, seated behind the desk and filing some papers.

Yuu shifted in their own chair, adjusting the rim of the baseball cap upon their head. They were suited in an inconspicuous jacket and sneakers, fingers toying with a badge in a pocket, hidden out of view. To the common man, they were a jogger--but one flash of their lilac gemstone bound to a black and white striped ribbon, and there would be no doubt as to what their true identity was.

The smell of coffee and tea grew stronger, and Yuu glanced up from behind the bill of their hat.

The bespectacled man from behind the fro

nt desk had approached. He had a sheepish smile, bearing a paper cup filled with hot brown liquid and a napkin with a donut laid upon it. Bright pink icing dusted with sugared violet petals crowned the golden fried pastry.

“Detective.”

“Mr. Clover.” Yuu nodded—a terse, polite greeting. “It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”

“Please, just ‘Trey’ is fine.” He offered the treats, which they readily accepted. “Sorry for calling you in on such short notice. I’m sure you’re busy juggling your other cases—but I think I speak for the entire department when I say we’re thankful that you were able to make it.”

“No worries, I’m used to it in this line of work,” Yuu replied. “It must be something pretty urgent this time around. The Chief sounded frantic over the phone.”

Trey rubbed at his chin, grasping for the right words. “Let’s just say he’s not in the best of moods right now. You’ll need that sugar to get through this in one piece.”

“That’s very thoughtful of you.”

“Just trying to avoid any trouble. You’d better finish them before you step into his office. You know how he hates it when there are crumbs or spills in there.”

“Aye, aye, sir.” Yuu gave a joking salute before starting to pack away at their snack. The drink was the instant kind, and practically scalding, but it was easy to tell that the donut was homemade. The pastry, flaky on the outside and fluffy on the inside, dusted with sugar granules and sweet icing. “Wouldn’t want the Chief to be blowing a fuse again.”

“No, definitely not. He’s done too much of that lately.” Trey carefully eyed Yuu’s donut, now only half of it left. “Oh, but be sure to brush your teeth a thorough cleaning tonight, or I might have some problems with you. Cavities and staining are real dangers, you know.”

“Are you Assistant Chief of Police or my dental hygienist?” Yuu took a generous swig, then a bite just as big. “You worry too much about everything.”

“Ahahah… Do I? It’s a habit, I guess. Comes with the job.”

“That stressful, huh?”

“Well, I do what I can to smooth things over. Hopefully you can too. It’s been difficult on our department with the Chief all rattled up about the… situation.” He stopped himself. “I’m sure you’ll hear all about it from him.”

So the case is top-secret, Yuu concluded with the last of their donut. Not to be discussed in the public.

They ran their tongue across the length of their mouth, lapping up the remains of sugary residue. “I understand. The details are not to leave his office.”

“You catch on quickly. No wonder why the Chief thinks so highly of your abilities.”

“Flattery’s a part of your tool kit as well, Trey?”

He raised his eyebrows. “… You’ve worked long enough with us to figure these things out. Nothing gets by you, it seems.”

“UGIGIGIGIGGGGHHHH!!”

The remainder of Yuu’s drink sloshed around in its cup, set into motion by the bloodcurdling scream.

A familiar man with orange waves erupted from the chief’s office, hurriedly slamming the door shut behind him. His typically relaxed features were arranged in panic, his hair frazzled.

“How did trying to calm him work out, Cater?” Trey inquired half-heartedly. It was a courtesy more than genuine curiosity.

“What do you think?” the senior officer groaned, sinking where he stood.

Yuu quickly finished their drink, tossing their trash—the evidence they had been there—away and then stood, adjusting their jacket. “That sounds like it’s my cue.”

“Yeah, it is.” Trey sighed, frowning. “He’s in a tough spot right. Be kind to him, will you? That’s all I ask.”

“You got it.” Yuu tipped their baseball cap as they passed the officer. “Thank you for the pick-me-up. I’ll be seeing you, then. Officer Diamond—get some rest.”

“Good luck.”

“You’ll need it, Yuu-chan! Brace yourself.”

The Police Chief was a small but serious man.

His character came through in his office space: books on law and order neatly arranged on shelves, papers and files alphabetically organized in their cabinets, and pens evenly spaced apart and arranged in rows. A crystal vase with deep red roses was poised beside his writing implements. A plate polished to a fine shine was propped up at his desk, reading: Riddle Rosehearts, Chief of Police.

Perched imposingly despite his short stature in his seat, he impatiently tapped a finger on an arm. Riddle’s face was a telltale red and veiny, proof of his earlier outburst, but was beginning to cool into a faint, smooth pink.

There was already another man in the office, sitting across from the Police Chief. He was pale and jittery in a suit the color of the night and sewn with blue sequins and glitter. A top hat rested upon his raven locks, the brim of it shading his hauntingly golden eyes.

Yuu removed their hat and, keeping it to their chest, gave a shallow bow as they entered. “Sir.”

One move out of line, one hair out of place, and they suspected he, in his volatile and vulnerable state, would explode anew.

“Welcome, Detective. I’m glad you could join us today.” Every word was a gruff puff of air, a leash with which to wrest control of his rage. Riddle gestured to the empty chair beside the nervous man. “Sit.”

Yuu obeyed, sinking into the seat offered. They casted a glance at the stranger adjacent to them, who was fiddling with his velvet-lined gloves.

“Mr. Crowley, this is the independent detective from Stray Cat Investigations that I had previously mentioned to you. The force has collaborated with them for a number of difficult cases in the past. Their wit and strategic skills have made them an invaluable asset. I thought it prudent to have them return to join us for your case as well.

“Yuu, meet Dire Crowley. He is the esteemed director and curator for the Sage’s Island Museum, and he’s come to us with his woes.”

“Hello, Mr. Crowley,” Yuu said politely. “It’s nice to meet you.”

He responded with a tired attempt at a smile. “Yes, you too.”

“Now that we’re all acquainted with one another...” Riddle produced a file from beneath his desk and placed it before himself. “Do you care to explain, or shall I?”

“I-I’ll elaborate!” Crowley crowed. He picked at a collection of keys belted to his waist, glistening gold under artificial lights. “The Sage’s Island Museum is planning a new exhibition on the Great Seven. As part of the exhibit, we are having many priceless artifacts flown in from all over Twisted Wonderland. We have donations from even Briar Valley’s royal family!!

“There will also be a great number of important VIP guests present for the grand opening of the exhibit. Royalty, wealthy benefactors, important diplomats, businessmen, celebrities... All individuals who wish to see their history on display! This is very important, you see!! M-My reputation--er, I mean, the museum’s reputation--is on the line here!!”

“Right.” Yuu nodded as they parsed through the information. “I’m following what you’re putting down. And where does your problem arise, Mr. Crowley?”

“Ah, now that,” Riddle smirked, “is the question of the hour.”

He opened his file, pulling out...

A single playing card, its back facing Yuu.

“I trust you’ve been keeping up with the news?”

“As any good detective would. There have been several robberies lately. Terrible, really.” Yuu’s expression clouded with concentration. “Hmm... but if it’s a potential robbery that you’re concerned about, Mr. Crowley... Doesn’t the Sage’s Island Museum boast a state-of-the-art security system from Olympus Corp.? I doubt the average thief would be able to bypass it.”

“That’s just the trouble,” Crowley loudly lamented.

“We are dealing with no ordinary thief,” Riddle clarified.

“It’s not?”

“No. Far from it.” The Police Chief exhaled sharply. “The string of robberies from before--they’re connected by a single thread, perpetuated by the same lone culprit. And now that scoundrel intends to continue his crime spree.”

“I’ve never heard of this before.”

“You shouldn’t have. It was a top-secret operation within my force since the first of its kind.”

“Why am I being told of it now?”

“Because, loathe as I am to admit it, the culprit has managed to outwit us and elude capture each and every time, He employs a bag of cheap parlor tricks and smoke and mirrors like the coward he is,” Riddle confessed begrudgingly. The blue-grey of his eyes were steely and stubborn. “A case as important as this needs the additional man—and brain—power, Detective.”

He placed the playing card down and slid it toward the detective. “This arrived in the morning at Mr. Crowley’s desk, the same as all the prior robberies. It gave him quite the fright. He rushed all the way to the station to beg for our assistance.”

“This is...” Yuu gingerly turned the card over, revealing a message scrawled on the other side in bright red gel ink. Each letter was big and bubbly, bursting with cheek and pomp.

Their heart jumped.

To the Old Crow that safeguards the Museum,

Heyo~

Your pockets look a lil’ heavy there, so I’ll help you out. (Aren’t I so kind?) Three days from now, I’ll claim one of your most prized treasures at the stroke of midnight.

Stand back and watch as I perform the greatest magic trick you’ll ever see... and make the portrait of the Queen of Hearts vanish before your very eyes. It’ll be a show-stopper!!

Until then,

Phantom Thief Knave of Hearts <3

P.S. Send the cops my regards, they can’t catch me lol (especially when their teapot tyrant’s patience is in SHORT supply geddit)

“They’re just flat-out announcing what their intentions are,” Yuu realized. They were half impressed, half shocked at the gall. “You said all of the victims received messages like this?”

“Calling cards, yes.” The fury had returned to Riddle’s features, causing his voice to spike and strain. “It’s infuriating!! What does he get off on, misappropriating magic as cheap parlor tricks for crime, writing notes in such a cocksure manner, taunting us to pursue him?!

“Not only is he poking fun at my height and committing a crime, but for mere SPORT?! For the THRILL of it?! He’s making a mockery of the good people of this island and of my men and our efforts to secure the peace!!”

The Police Chief slammed a fist down on his desk, rattling his glass vase and setting his perfectly straight pens askew. Crowley shrunk back in fear. “That Knave of Hearts...!! He must be stopped at all costs!!”

“Y-Yes, absolutely!!” Crowley chimed in. “For my--er, I mean, for the museum’s sake, this criminal must be put behind bars!! That’s why I’ve come to you, my good people!

“My taxpayer dollars help fund the police force, so I’ve come to collect on what its promise to protect and to serve the community!! Well, here’s the community at your doorstep asking you to protect and to serve!!”

“That’s why you want to put me on this case,” Yuu concluded, clasping the calling card to their racing heart. “To prevent this from going down tonight.”

“And furthermore,” Riddle added, “to investigate the identity of this so-called phantom thief once the museum is safely secured.”

“That’s a tall order, sir.”

“You’ll have access to our force’s resources, and to my officers. You will assist in overseeing this operation, with maps and outlines of the museum’s security detail from Mr. Crowley. We’ll cooperate to create a plan of attack to apprehend the Knave.”

“You misunderstand me. I never said I wouldn’t take the job,” Yuu coolly informed the Chief. Their mouth cocked upwards with confidence. “I’m always up for a challenge.”

“Oh, blessed day!! From the very bottom of my oh-so-generous heart, thank you very much!!” Crowley cried tearfully.

For the first time the entire briefing, Riddle smiled back at Yuu. “Hmph. That’s what I like to hear. Happy to be working with you again, Detective.”

“Likewise, Chief.”

The sun had already set when Yuu exited the station, the stars blinking into existence. Several hours had been spent picking the museum curator’s brain with a fine-toothed comb, looking over layouts, and memorizing security detail. The information had been well-stocked, and now came the time to let it marinate and bloom into plans.

Stuffing their hands in their pockets, Yuu shuffled down the sidewalk and past rows of parked vehicles. Ahead, neon lights flashed in and out, and the trains rattled on their well-worn tracks, buses and cars honking at each other, the chatter of street vendors filling the air.

And something different than the usual tonight.

The city never slept, always buzzed with energy. Yuu had become accustomed to its sights and sounds, finding them even comforting. Their best ideas were conceived against the hum of the cityscape. It was just soft enough to not fully distract, but just noticeable enough to tug at their thoughts for long enough to stray into new territories and concepts.

Light from lonely streetlamps created tears in the darkness, illuminating the path to their favorite downtown thinking spot: the Mostro Lounge. A good (albeit overpriced) drink would chase away their tiredness.

Yuu continued with that promise in mind, every step catlike. First quick, next slow, then quick, moderate, slow, quick, slow, quick, moderate. Their speed, ever alternating.

Their ears strained against the sounds of the city, slowly parsing through the individual elements.

Trains, buses, cars, chatter… and the soft footsteps masked by them. Footsteps which matched Yuu’s pace.

There was no mistaking it now.

I’m being followed.

They didn’t look to see who it was—the first rule of tailing a target was to never alert them to your awareness. Yuu would know (as oftentimes they were the one in the position of tailer).

They cast their eyes across the street, which was busy with bodies. Once Yuu merged with the crowd, they could easily shake off their stalker.

Their feet picked up their pace again, hurrying to the crosswalk. It was a glaring red, advising pedestrians to stop.

Shoot, Yuu cursed.

They felt a presence step up beside them. From the corner of their eye, they could make out a dark form--clothes. Yuu pretended to check the time on their phone, and glimpsed him in the reflection.

He was in a hoodie, with the hood pulled up and head down to conceal his features. His hands, too, were out of sight, a sea of baggy fabric hiding identifying features, save for his frame. Lanky, but reasonably packed with muscle to keep up with Yuu.

The man shifted, and his sight grazed theirs. His eyes were hard and icy, a silent threat.

Yuu quickly focused on the crosswalk light. Their heartbeat became as loud as the surrounding sounds. Screeching above the vehicles, shouting from the rooftops. THA-THUMP, THA-THUMP, THA-THUMP.

At last, the light turned from red to white.

Walk.

They started--and so did he.

“Excuse me.” A hand came upon their shoulder. The other pulled at something with a sinister glint. “Do you have a second?”

No walking, Yuu corrected themselves. Run!!

They sprinted down the crosswalk, jostling pedestrians with a hasty “sorry!” thrown back at them. As Yuu weaved through the crowd as fast as they could, they could not completely shunt out the man after them.

“Hey, please wait!! Where are you going?! C-Come back, I need to talk to you!”

His voice carried above the others. People jolted back, the crowd parting to make way for the man to charge forth. His volume swelled louder and louder as he gained on them.

Towering apartments seemed to bear down on Yuu. Their windows, glaring.

A shop. Find a shop and get inside!!

Yuu pumped their arms, pleaded for their legs to move more efficiently.

Again, a weight fell upon their shoulder. It was a clamp, fingers biting Yuu’s skin through their jacket as they dug in and held firm.

The other hand wielded the same shining object that it had before. Yuu looked more closely this time, and the unease in them dissipated. It was not the pointed tip of a knife, but the glint of a familiar officer’s badge wreathed in golden roses.

The man tore off his hood with a sigh--though Yuu noticed that he wasn’t one bit out of breath. Navy bangs fell across his forehead, his eyes a peacock green-blue, much friendlier under the streetlamps than the crosswalk signs.

He smiled at Yuu as though he were greeting an old friend. His grip turned into a tender squeeze. “I finally caught up with you!”

The detective awkwardly pulled away, confusion scrawled on their face. “Um... Sorry, who are you? I don’t believe we’ve met before.”

“Oh! Uh...” The man jumped, retracting his hand. “That’s because we haven’t! Er, not officially anyway, but I’ve heard a lot about you!!”

Yuu pointed to his badge. “That. You’re an officer?”

“Yessir!” The man offered the proof of his identity and stiffly saluted. “Officer Deuce Spade, sir!! I’m a new recruit...!! I just joined the force a few weeks ago!”

Yuu mustered a faint smile. The darned fool was going to give them away. “... Am I in trouble, officer?”

“Nossir! Not at all!” His entire face shone with eagerness, earnest, and a slightly nervous energy. Maybe Yuu would have found it adorable (in the same way that a child trying hard was adorable), were he not blasting your occupation to the public. “Why would you be in trouble, sir?! You’re working with...”

“Okaaay, that’s enough out of you!” Yuu slapped a hand over Deuce’s mouth, silencing him.

Curious onlookers murmured amongst themselves. Some had taken to halt and full-on gawk. Children pointed, adult narrowing their eyes with suspicion.

Yuu frowned, removing their hand to shoo pedestrians away. “Nothing to see here, folks. Just a misunderstanding. Move along, Wonder Boy and I can settle this ourselves.”

“Wonder Boy?” Deuce, in a daze, pointed to himself. “Is that... me?”

“Who else would I be talking about?” Yuu folded their arms. “I assume you’re free now?”

“I am, sir! I was just let off my shift a little while ago, sir!”

“First, drop the ‘sir’. It’s giving me a headache,” Yuu instructed. “Second, if you’re free, then you’ll be joining me for a drink and a chat. We have things to discuss--chief among them being why you were following me.”

Ring-a-ling!

A bell sounded as the door to the Mostro Lounge swung open. Deuce stepped into a new world, Yuu at his side.

The interior itself was dim, but glass lights fastened in the shape of jellyfish projected swimming incandescent lights in purple, blue, and pink. Velvet booths lined one half of the eatery, the other, a glossy bar with tall, narrow stools, the shelves behind it healthily stocked with bottles in jeweled tones. Strangers poised with drink took residence in most of the seats.

The entire back wall had been repurposed into a massive aquarium teeming with aquatic plants and exotic creatures. Seaweed and coral gently swayed to the rhythm of the smooth jazz floating through the lounge, fish frolicking among them.

“Whoooa,” Deuce gasped, craning his head to drink in every detail. “I’ve never been to a place as classy as this. It looks so expensive. You think my salary’s enough to cover at least an appetizer?”

“Hang on tight to your wallet,” Yuu warned. “This place will squeeze you for every thaumark you’re worth and then some—and they won’t feel a bit of remorse about it.”

The detective raised an arm, flagging a nearby waiter.

Their uniform was simple yet sleek: dark dress pants, a white bow tie, spotless gloves, and a cummerbund and suspenders over a lavender button-up shirt. It allowed for slight variation—one waiter skidded by with his shirt buttoned as low as food safety regulations deemed safe. Another jotted down orders with a jacket thrown over his shoulders and a pair of glasses tucked into the crevice of his buttons.

The waiter Yuu called out to approached like a shark fin cutting through still water, neatly bowing to greet their waiting customers. He was prim and proper compared to the other servers, not a button out of place.

When he raised his head, Deuce marveled at his mismatched olive and gold irises, the teal of his hair marred by a stripe of black. Three diamond-shaped scales dangled from his left ear, as sharp as his eyes.

“I bid you welcome to the Mostro Lounge, honored guests,” the waiter said smoothly. He gaze immediately cut to Deuce. “I see you’ve brought a friend with you, today, Yuu-san. How delightfully rare.”

“Acquaintance. We just met outside under… less than ideal circumstances.”

“Oya, how quick you were to seize on that chance encounter. I may even deem you a bigger opportunist than our dear manager.”

“… Is that a good thing or a bad thing?” Deuce inquired.

“Perhaps you will find the answer to your question, should you act as a patron at our establishment for long enough.”

“Quit toying with him, Jade. You know what we’re here for,” Yuu grumbled. “My usual.”

“If that is what you wish. And for this gentleman acquaintance of yours?”

“Just ice water is fine, sir!”

Jade maintained his polite smile. “Very well. One glass of ice cold water for you. I will bring you a menu as well, in case you begin to feel peckish late into the night.”

“Oh, thanks!”

“Right this way then.” Jade gestured for the two to follow him.

“He’s upselling you, you know,” Yuu pointed out under their breath. “Hoping that you’ll buy something when presented with the opportunity to spend.”

“E-Eh, he is?! I didn’t even realize…”

“Fufufu. Please, do not let your worries consume you. You have come to relax, correct? We at the Mostro Lounge ask that you put your fins and your feet up and enjoy yourself while the night is still young.”

They were escorted to two empty stools in a (relatively) quiet corner of the bar. The glass jellyfish lights were clustered in the center of the main dining area, leaving the corner like a slice of dark, uncharted waters. Jass music and conversation filtered into a muffled melody.

Yuu plopped down with relief, followed by an apprehensive Deuce. He slowly sank into the cushy seat.

“I will be right back with your drinks. If you will excuse me.” With another bow, Jade rounded the bar and rolled up his sleeves—the transition from waiter to bartender. Presenting his back to the duo, he set to plucking bottles off of the shelves.

Deuce blinked. He still hadn’t taken to fully processing his new surroundings. “Are we really going kick back and have drinks when there’s a serial thief on the loose?”

“We can’t talk about that in public, or risk blowing my cover. It’s safe to talk here,” Yuu reassured him. “What happens in the Mostro Lounge stays in the Mostro Lounge. Say what you want about the slimy staff, but they know how to keep their patrons’ secrets. Client confidentiality and all.”

The young officer brightened. “Ooooh, I get it!”

“… You’re not the sharpest tool in the shed,” Yuu remarked bluntly. They slipped off their baseball cap, letting loose their hair. “So? Let’s have it.”

“Have what?”

“Your reason for following me.”

“Oh!! That.” Deuce nervously scratched at the back of his neck. “That’s kind of…”

The detective drummed their fingers on the polished counter. Methodical, deliberate. “You mentioned that you recently joined the force. However, only senior officials in the police department and myself were privy to this operation. How did you come to learn about it?”

Deuce stiffened, thrown off his beat (if he had any to begin with). “Th-That’s…!”

“I’m asking you a question, Mr. Spade. Please answer me truthfully.”

“I… um… Truth is, I…” Deuce stared at his lap, unable to meet the detective’s eyes. “I might have eavesdropped when I returned from my patrol shift…”

“Go on,” Yuu coaxed.

“There was a report I had to submit to the Chief, but it sounded like he was busy in his office. It’s hard to not notice him when he raises his voice, sir. I decided to wait outside until he was done, and… well, I got curious.”

“Wasn’t Assistant Chief Clover also present? He just let you do that without a single protest?”

“Assistant Chief Clover was very nice to me! He laughed a little and said ‘make sure you don’t get caught with your hand in the cookie jar’!”

Darn it, Trey!! You could’ve been a LITTLE stricter with this guy…! Yuu groaned, massaging the bridge of their nose. “Okay, I think I’m starting to get a better picture of what went down. You followed me wanting to learn more about the operation.”

Like a curious child chasing after a white rabbit. Still immature, still wondering, and still way over their head.

“Yes, but that’s not all!” Deuce insisted. He abruptly stood from the table. “There’s an even more important reason than just satisfying my curiosity, sir!”

Yuu quirked an eyebrow. “And what’s that?”

“I had to talk to you—without the Chief around. I had to. That’s why I followed you in secret.” The officer nibbled his lower lip, as if biting back something harsh and bitter from coming up.

“Out with it, Mr. Spade.”

“Pardon the intrusion,” Jade coolly interjected. His tone was nonchalant but his bemused smile was a telltale sign that he was relishing in every second of the hot gossip. “Your beverages.”

He slid two glasses between Yuu and Deuce before departing. One was tall and slim—a highball—loaded with carbonated water and fruity gummies. Yellow for jeweled pineapples, red for ruby berries, green for frozen mint, black for floral cacao, and blue from pure azure salt. It was Yuu’s usual, the famed Mystery Drink. The other glass was, by comparison, an ordinary drink of water, a single large, clear cube of ice floating in it.

A bead of sweat ran down Deuce’s jawline. Condensation forming and racing on his glass of water.

Suddenly, the officer slapped both hands on the counter, slamming his face down upon its surface. His navy hair splayed, forehead touching the table in a display of humility.

Yuu almost spilled their drink. “What are you doing?”

“I’m begging you, sir!! P-Please put me on the mission!!” Deuce pleaded, his voice shaky but resolute. “I… I want to help catch the Knave of Hearts too!!”

“If that’s all you wanted, why ask me? Go through the proper channels to…”

“I can’t!! The Chief would never allow it.” His expression creased with shame. “He says rookies need to work their way up from meter maid to working on cases.”

“He’s right. You need to grow into these things, not rush in head-first in a burst of passion.” Yuu made to take a sip of their drink—but the officer’s fist collided with the counter, the liquid inside the glass sloshing overboard. Seltzer water splashed onto their pant leg, leaving a sticky wet spot on a thigh.

“P-Please reconsider! I know how to handle myself in a fight! I’m fast, I could easily catch up with him if it’s a race on foot!”

“Look,” the detective said irritably, “I don’t know what you’re hoping to accomplish here. Fact is, no matter how much you ask, I wouldn’t want to take you on for this case. You’re too green behind the ears—and sorry, but I just don’t see you as an asset.

“You may be strong and quick on your feet, but it’ll take more than strength and speed to catch the Knave of Hearts. There’s a reason he hasn’t been caught yet.” Yuu tapped at their temple. “It’s this. He’s got smarts, and we need to combat that with smarts of our own.”

“I-I can be smart!! I can try to, at least! Please, just let me try…!!”

Frustrated, Yuu scrutinized the young man again. Their eyes roaming, searching, for detail wrong, a hair out of place.

Years of sleuthing had built up a great amount of cynicism and distrust in the detective. How many times had they pulled back the curtain, revealing the ugly truths hidden out of plain sight? How many bruised egos--both clients and coworkers--had they encountered? People seeking status or to feed their own pride.

Yet when they looked at Deuce, none of that ugliness or ego came through. Here was someone who stubbornly stared right back at Yuu, unwilling to back down, even when his dignity lay in tatters on the floor the instant he prostrated himself.

Another selfish bid for recognition? They ventured, toying with the idea. Maybe personal ambition, looking to climb up in the world.

“... One reason,” Yuu said, holding up an index finger. “Give me one good reason why I should take you on. Convince me.”

Deuce recoiled--as though even he hadn’t expected to have made it this far, or to be taken seriously at all. His brows creased with effort as he racked the recesses of his mind to find the right phrasing.

A second later, he let out a piercing shout.

“GAAAAAAAAH!!”

With a grunt, Deuce grasped his cup of ice water and lifted it to his lips. He hammered the drink in a single swig, releasing a satisfied hoot. The liquid courage had revived the man, returning the spark to him.

In a voice as clear as the drink he had just downed, Deuce said, “It’s for my mom. She’s just about the sweetest, most hard-working person I know.”

He hung his head and slammed his empty cup down, shaking the entire table.

“She raised me as a single parent. Mom never once complained, only wanted the best life for me.” Deuce glared into his glass, speaking with scorn and anger--not at others, but for himself. “And how did I repay her? I... turned to delinquency.

“I acted out because I wasn’t man enough to do the mature thing and work on myself!! She blamed herself for my stupid decisions! I made mom worry for me so, so much...”

Plip, plip.

Deuce faltered, letting quiet tears dribble down his cheeks and landing on the cube of ice left in his glass. Once they made contact with the frozen block, it was impossible to tell what was water and what was salt.

“I swore to myself that I would turn my life around... to show mom that it’s not her fault, that she did all she could to raised someone who could contribute to society!! So I studied really hard at the police academy, and even though my grades were crappy, I managed to graduate...!!”

He choked up, a concoction of fiery passion infused in his stuttering words. “I can finally be that model officer and make a change in the community! But I haven’t done a damn thing...! I just play meter maid while bad guys are out there running free, when I could be out there making this city a safer place for mom and everyone that lives here...!!”

The noises of the lounge seemed to fade into a stoic silence around Deuce. His declaration reverberated loudly. “I have to do this. I need to do this.”

He bowed again, his forehead pressed hard against the surface of the table. The single word he uttered was hoarse, desperate.

“Please.”

Deuce pried himself up almost painfully. The eyes were aquamarine, wet with hot tears. Something shone through them in shades of blue and green, priceless as any treasure: an honesty that burned like an eternal flame.

Yuu startled, striken by a single, haunting revelation: He’s telling the truth.

“... I don’t think I’ve met someone like you before,” they said cryptically. “I don’t doubt your story—but as touching as it is, I don’t know if...”

Hesitation reared its head, and Yuu forced themselves to look away. Couldn’t bear to see him, that wide-eyed sincerity.

Emotion clashing with their sound logic. Two things that shouldn’t have belonged together colliding. 

Wait... things that don’t belong together? Things I didn’t expect, surprises and twists to the tale...

A ex-delinquent turned into a policeman. A selfishness turned selfless. An anticipated lie turned into a truth. Something there that hadn’t been before.

The detective’s mind raced, quickly outpacing the words leaving their mouth. A solution which subverted expectations, a trap laced with honey for a man with sticky fingers.

That’s it. We’ll pull a trick of our own.

“Okay, I’ve changed my mind,” Yuu abruptly announced. “You’re in on this operation, Mr. Spade.”

“R-Really?!” Deuce’s face nearly tore in half, his volume revving up like a motorcycle engine. “You mean it?!”

“I do.”

Yuu took a cool sip of their Mystery Drink. Flavors from all over Twisted Wonderland cascaded over their tongue—a triumphant, fleeting pleasure.

They set their glass down and bent over, gripping Deuce by the strings of his hoodie. Yuu tugged, bringing the policeman lurching forward.

His clammy forehead against theirs. Centimeters away, his eyes widened. A flushed heat climbed to his cheeks, his voice set in a stammer.

“S-Sir, what are we...”

“You’ll have to follow my instructions very carefully,” Yuu replied with a devious grin. “Listen up, rookie: cuz you’re going to be the star of this show. Here’s the plan...”

The ambience of the lounge drowned out Yuu’s whispers. From afar, their words could only be read through the shapes of their mouth, the increasingly confused and alarmed expressions that Deuce pulled.

Jade observed them patiently, chuckling to himself. “My, my, it seems like our genius detective has found yet another solution.”

CLATTER, CLATTER!!

A tray piled high with empty plates and dishes was slammed down. Jade’s twin peered around the stack, leaning lazily against the bar.

“Eeeh, but I bet against them this time.”

“Playing the contrarian runs its risks.” Jade picked up a glass, staring at his brother through it. The golden orb called his left eye was clear as a topaz. “As for myself, I’m excited to see how this plays out.”

PLAP.

A notepad came down on the table as a third waiter joined them.

“Both of you need to stop gossiping and get back to work,” their manager chided, sliding the notepad—scrawled with fresh orders—to Jade. “Leave the customers to tend to their own business. We’ll soon know the outcome.”

[To be continued...]

[hoegender]

i drew a thing for this beautiful fanfic by @the-nameless-ramekin >:3c i 100% recommend this fic for people who enjoy crying (and beautiful writing in general!!) anyway hey rame...it's ao3 user bachstreetsolo o(-( i love your writing (i cried!!)

keep reading for rambles and alt images 🌟

fun little detail (kind of) - i gave each character clothes in a hue close to their partner's hair colour...vil's was a bit hard to work in but she has a bit of white in her hat. also sorry for having the opposite of same face syndrome

honestly i think this might be the most detailed piece i've done? even my rook birthday art wasn't this intense omg. i aim to do more detailed pieces in the future 💥 i can't keep doing flat backgrounds forever...i'll keep improving 🔥 and seriously read the fic it's crazy good

[i-love-your-shades-of-wrong]

I have a type:

Dark haired, intelligent, emotional, psychopaths

[theostrophywife]

if villain bad then why so fucking sexy?

tom babe let me be your whorecrux

[murmurmm00mm]

lol giggle riddle's reading glasses are my favorite concept👁👁

is he nearsighted or farsighted?...

[wisteriainslumber]

It’s Club Dayyyy

nrc club hcs for the club vignettes we never got

warnings: curse words, b6 spoilers for the movie club section

Mountain Appreciation Club

just jade, himself, and the great outdoors

appreciating life, having a nice peaceful hike on a sunny day

or a nice dip in the pond, it really depends if he wants to connect with nature or hunt nature that day

no, its not lonely being by himself, it’s jade’s cottagecore vacay away from NRC

he can literally just chill on the mountains as a club activity. no loud NRC tussles, no responsibilities, no having to play 4D chess to be in everyone’s good graces

its a goddamn dream come true

plus if you join, you can experience this too!!

a fan of any miniature items. the teensy tiny mushrooms are so cute they fill him with so much joy that hes shedding tears

if jade has lil terrariums, why not tiny fairy houses? 

DIY miniature doll houses with flower lamps, strawberry bean bags, and mushroom seats

this is totally a part of club activities btw <333 and yes his club room is decorated with all of these things, its very cozy

you don’t need to be an animal magnet like silver to get help from the forest critters

jade respects the earth, the birdies sometimes leave flowers out for him on the path he usually travels

for anyone screaming 'its a fae trap', his curiosity just rose astronomically

way too bold of you to assume he'd avoid such a thing

that ring of mushrooms? it looks very pretty, it’s like nature’s call for a photo op. maybe you should stand in it. jade will help you take pictures :)

if jade is ever feeling too lonely, he’ll bring a plushie along with him, for the illusion of company. its sort of nice because he can talk to it and encourages him to take more pictures (plushie tea party, anyone?)

all of these photos he takes arent only for the ‘gram its for the club (technically personal) scrapbook. he shows it to floyd & azul every time he takes a hike and every time jade pulls it out, there are audible groans

gargoyle research & mountain appreciation should have a collab i think it would be very enriching

Pop Music Club

all of their instrument expertise comes from outside of the club

u think they actually learned how to play in that club?? pffft its a glorified hang out spot

just a bunch of friends who all know how to play instruments hanging out under the guise of club activities

we are going under the impression that clubs either get no supervision or very little supervision bc there is no way this club will still be standing if so

their band practice is only for appearances bc all they do is play the few songs they know well then spend the rest of their time preforming trick shots w/ their instruments

kalim is reading off the sheet music meant for the trombone but its okay he’s going off the vibe™

as opposed to cater, who can’t even read the sheet music, but are they a boss with playing by ear (girls got perfect pitch)

if you hear the band get off-beat, its very hard to pinpoint who the culprit is bc none of them are on the same page physically, they communicate telepathically (its all in the Vibes)

they would be the band that continues playing during fire alarms and severe emergencies. nothing like a bit of background music to ease panic, right?

however they’re very quick learners. like if someone wants to belt off their lungs to a song, the rest of the club will find the sheet music and join

(seriously though, lilias got some pipes. kalim is getting too into it with bashing the drums and cater has to catch up bc in what world does a single college kid become so good at singing about unrequited love??)

put them in a room together and they are all fighting for custody of the braincell

all of cater’s and lilia’s old guitar picks are used as decorations around the club

as in, they connected them on sashes and it’s hanging like some colourful fairy lights

they let kalim pick three of the collection and those turned into pop music friendship bracelets :)

their meetings will end with ‘we should totally start a band’ (and they never do)

Board Game Club

monopoly was Extra banned after azul joined

have you ever felt extorted by the bank? that there is suddenly a surprise interest for taking too long to buy a property? to be told you counted wrong even though you're pretty damn sure u triple counted?? bc thats what he did as the banker

the biggest betrayals come out of this club during uno

crowley suggested to play more peaceful games like scribbl.io but then it ended up with a competition of art skills

their club room has drawings and fanart of their favourite characters in there 

students of this club absolutely CARRY the art bazaars. anything you can think of under the sun, they can do

need jewelry? pottery? paper crafts? cool paintings? costumes? you can absolutely commission them (uhh if you can find them, that is)

the D&D sessions in this club get so majorly intense that students have started physically reenacting the actions, like larping

crowley would have let the students keep the very real and very sharp swords they brought if pomefiore student C didn’t get a leg injury from them

better luck next time

but who am i kidding, if idia is feeling particularly silly that day he’ll permit the use of magic

and by silly he means when a club member says something so factually incorrect about the D&D setting that nothing less than fire can make them atone for their sins

and what is NRC if there aren’t any consequences for the losers? the mantle of the gamemaster is passed around at every meeting, so depending on their luck, the loser either wears a dunce hat or assists in the winner’s projects

despite all of this though, they are ride or die!!! if you need help farming mats for a game, you will have at least 3 classmates available to help

co-op is amazing in this club. it may be filled with taunts but generally they are very supportive and are a very cohesive team

it makes you wonder why they don’t work together very often

well thats because theyre only bonded by common goal. they are Petty. they’re still bitter about losing at uno

Equestrian Club

probably the most order you'll get, clubwise

not because riddle is part of the club its more like the horses will punish any misbehaviour before he can

the savanaclaw students defend the horses with an energy even sebek couldnt manage

poor ignihyde student B got flown across the field for being too rough with the lead

now on top of the very hurtful gut injury, ignihyde student B is getting mentally kicked down for treating the horse like a toy

during the beginning of the club, there would be info sessions and you’d have to pass a test regarding safety, maintenance, and proper care of the horses before you even begin to ride

and even before that, theres a grace period to establish a bond with the animals 

after silver pushed the agenda, riddle now schedules weekly bonding time with their horses

the scarabia students enjoy this immensely they'll be braiding flowers into every horses' hair

NRC students go ham on halloween and that means their pretty horseys are also getting cool costumes to match

sebek’s horse is out of the stable the quickest to run up to him

on the outside, very wholesome. but if you’re standing near sebek in any shape or form, it looks like his horse is charging up to trample him and it is very scary

the equestrian club magicam page is filled with the most photogenic horses and costumes you’ll see

and depending on who is posting, the captions will consist of horse puns or informative facts on horse maintenance and care

i seriously mean it when the members of the equestrian club start reciting these in their sleep

replace the salt licks, put on winter blankets, polish the hooves

and most importantly: WEAR YOUR PPE.

honestly this rule should be applied mostly to spelldrive & science club members but hell, that’s their problem. your ppe is just as important for you as it is to the horsies, so dont slack or else ur going on club probation

you know how people baby-talk their pets

now imagine that with a bunch of horse girls

thats the whole club

Track & Field Club

between a bunch of boys and the great outdoors, extremely dumb things happen in this club

if theyre done doing club activities, theres truly nothing to do

and they take advantage of the lack of supervision by hijacking the sprinklers

lots of water fights bc the sun is beating down on them while they’re doing exercise. ‘stay hydrated’ is their club motto

if all else goes wrong, at least the grass is watered amirite?

as far as ik, vargas supervises this club but they seem very chill. im not sure if this club is the one that’s in dire need of supervision

there’s a bunch of inside jokes that vargas somehow overheard??

he’ll say them back in later club meetings without a lick of context

a student once asked how his life in NRC was and while most of it was a lesson to take care of your physical health, the club has exclusive gossip on how vargas thought crewel was the most annoying classmate ever😭

they’re not snitches though bc they still wanna hear more juicy stories

a few curious students tried that raw egg diet and got sick as all hell

salmonella is deadly, my friends

rip to the beginners because vargas will ask you to do 100 curl-ups as a WARM UP. 

instructs like a sergeant but has the energy of a fun uncle

he will let the students pick a warm-up song 

very few fights or disagreements happen in this club mostly because everything can be solved through competition

whoever can run past the big oak tree first gets to be vargas’ helper for the duration of club time

the students are free to decorate their headbands for the club and because friendship is #magic, deuce and jack exchanged their headbands to decorate

at some point they started have mud sculpture contests and by ‘mud sculpture’ i mean they make mud hurdles and whoever can’t jump over them has to put the club equipment back by the end of practice

this club loves touching grass so much

Magift Club

leona is a wonderful leader but unfortunately he is also the least tolerant of problems that arise

if you can sort thru puberty then u can sort out ur own problems damn🙄🙄 yall really be going to leona to complain about octavinelle student B whipping a disk at ur head at ur grown age???

yall seen ruggie play upside down with his damn grippers on the broom

some of the club members think thats super cool and try to do the same

only to sustain head injuries

which epel very nicely helped them to patch up

before every game they group huddle and leona gets dragged in all the time no matter how much he complains

the mantle of the speech is passed around the entire team on different games

everyone plays a part!

and by playing a part i mean that they all scrawl down mean things to say about the rsa students and put it in a hat

they read them aloud when team morale is low

any breakfast skippers in this team broke their streak around the first week of joining

yk, because it is unhealthy™ but mostly bc if leona catches anyone skipping meals before practice or a match, they’re getting a new one ripped into them

he’ll prattle on about how he doesn’t want anyone at their 70% at a practice or that not eating makes their movements sluggish and a liability

and its very easy to take him at face value but i promise he means it all in good nature and concern for health <3

sometimes leona will use epel as an example and praising him for being a good student™ for eating and intaking nutrients or wtv 

but epel will sometimes then start an impromptu presentation about the nutrients in fruits and food which is a mix of things he’s learned from his family and from pomefiores routine

ruggie ofc says smth entirely different, that any food is energy, and leona promptly throws the slipper at him sjdsjdf

ruggie treats his broom like a person

very respectful, talks to it for no reason (or maybe he’s talking to himself??)

pomefiore student A believes that he’s establishing a relationship with a broom and isn’t that a beautiful thing?

riders need to have a good relationship with their horse, so why shouldn’t the same logic be applied to a broom?

yeah, this gets travelled around a bit and people who are not part of the spelldrive club are puzzled. like do magift players get an extra special broom or something???

Gargoyle Research Club

ALL on his lonesome its the saddest thing ever

if you ask a senior, they will tell you an old rumour that the club is a disguise for dark arts practice

to be fair, there’s nothing refuting the rumour but it got quickly shut down just because it wasn’t wise to talk about the future heir in such a way

the air of the club is so vibey bc come on, its just strolls around the campus and learning gargoyle lore

its mal’s niche interest and he’s sort of winning since hes the sole member and can ‘sign off’ that he attended even if he loses track of time and misses the meeting

‘‘meeting” is a very generous term its mal at a round table with a bunch of empty chairs 

jade and malleus are members of the #soloclub so jade passes on his advice to fill the empty spaces with plushies

hes learned every name of the gargoyles that reside on campus, and if they are nameless, sometimes he’ll bestow a name upon them

mal would help unclog or brush off any leaves that may have fallen into the drainage systems (yuu keeps putting leaves in the gargoyle mouths to ‘feed them’)

one of malleus’ favourite things to do in this club is when its raining. he loves to see the statues just spout off water so gracefully

he’d sculpt the most beautiful mini gargoyles though??

like i don’t think they’d be full size (for now) because there’s gargies all over campus, but just know, these miniature versions are all fully functional just waiting to do their job

lets not forget that mal is on his second? third? volume of his self published gargoyle research books. the next volumes are coming with illustrations for optimum learning efficiency  

the illustrations may occasionally have footnotes that say something along the lines of ‘gargoyle stationed next to the school gates, nicely polished’ 

lowkey though, he finds the statues weathered by time and storms the most beautiful. theres entire sections in his books just waxing poetic about the craftsmanship & the stone withstanding the force of nature and erosion

and ofc how to determine the approximant date of a sculpture, along with how cracks, rust, pigmentation, and whatever else stands as a testament to how beautiful things age

i think this club might benefit from powerpoint club initiation idk though

Science Club

yeah i said it before but these are unsupervised students with access to a wide range of chemicals

most of them are hyper-reactive as well

sometimes its nice to mix some stuff together and watch it blow up

and sometimes u be feeling a little thirsty and risky that day

diasomnia student A had grown fins and a tail because of this and looked majestic with them, even though he absolutely couldn’t breathe

some bright scarabia student had the fun idea to incorporate their own magic into the mix. you know, because plants, ingredients, and metals with magical properties weren’t ‘oomph’ enough

its not that they don’t know how to create a shimmer potion but, buuut what if they doubled the pixie dust so they can create an ultra light potion?? (*cough* it might function like a solar flare lolol oopsie daisies <33)

rumours say this student had received malleus draconia’s praise, but for some strange reason, none of the club members present had a reliable alibi 

even though they need to send in a full list of ingredients and their intentions with them, the students still end up creating borderline dangerous potions

its not like theres a bag inspection or anything

unspoken agreement within the club that anyone can bring in whatever the hell they want as long as they leave no traces afterwards

the science club has gotten extra extra sneaky because oftentimes crewel will show up unannounced to ensure that no one is doing something stupid

rook hunt is the anti-thesis of lab safety he has actually violated pretty much any and all lab protocols, past, present, and future

his bad influence is causing the other club members to forgo their safety equipment too

rook do be drinking random chemicals to see what they would do but what caused one student’s sclera to turn colours only causes rook to hiccup pink bubbles. its a strange phenomena 

and no trey is not exempt from this bc what were his club members with equally as dangerous chemicals in their bag gonna do? snitch? be fr

curiosity runs rampant in this club and none of their intentions are for the better

Basketball Club

jamil is the mom of the team

against his will, as always

his leadership style is much more different than leonas

while leona will step in if needed, jamil will dip

sort it out amongst yourselves. if he comes back in 10 minutes and theyre still squabbling, then jamil is going to sic floyd on their asses

of course it works every time. if you consider "fighting to the death" as an ethical suggestion

often times jamil will praise heartslabyul student E for being so well behaved but this is obviously a dig at ace

poor ace got demoted. he's the biggest menace in the first year group now he has to deal with ppl who are bigger menaces than him

without fail, every club meeting there will be someone reenacting the basketball song from that one classic movie. singing it just ups your chances of getting the ball in the basket i dont make the rules

if you listen closely, you can almost hear the squeaky shoes on the court

every time someone makes a shot, you will hear ‘LIMP WRIST SYNDROME’ being shouted

i dont know the basketball positions but ace is the one that’s all over the court. hes fast as hell. his members say its bc hes the shortest one on the team 

all those sleight of hand tricks arent only for parties, they’re also for playing ball >:) dupes the enemy team so much when fighting over the ball

this club is both the biggest victim and the biggest instigator for locker room antics because everyone is very very petty

jamil would scold them for tracking water all over the floor but will not stop floyd for soaking everyone with the shower head he personally knocked off the wall

until he got caught in the fire, now jamil has snatched the shower head and by the seven is he going to use magic to make that shit boiling hot

and ofc vargas mistook those burns as sun burns and praised the entire club for being so hardworking in the hot weather jsdfjh

once one of the diasomnia students thought they would get extra pumped for a game if they pretended the floor was an rsa student's face

they smacked the ball so hard on the ground that it ricochet up into their face and accidentally broke their nose

poor dude, you really gotta feel for him

Film Studies Club

crap ton of students signed up when vil was in first year solely for the reason that ‘vil is in this club’

which of course, was nice but vil made sure there was brutal auditions to weed out the ones who joined just to see him

many people believe it’s savanaclaw & the magift club that snorts protein like its crack

no, it’s pomefiore

and by proxy, vil is enforcing the same rules

gotta keep ur body on its toes, eat good for no pimple, work hard and rest harder

on another note though, oof, personal vocal lessons with coach schoenheit😩

the octavinelle students love to gossip and start rumours and play it off as it being "improv"

rumours circle around though and one epel felmier is not very happy about allegedly being an RSA transfer student

when they have movie analysis days, vil rarely ever lets his own movies be shown

yes, feedback is good from anyone, but not only is he a senior, but one of the leading figures of this club. the only thing he’d hear were praises, and if he wanted that, he’d just go to rook

ortho is having a blast working with all the different kinds of cameras, and loves when the members request for a camera with a very specific function

it gets his genius little mind to work and he can show off his expertise. it’s a win/win!

also uses all of this data to weaponize his acting to the max. he will learn how to use crocodile tears for his benefit, he will learn how to intimidate people even with his adorable form

vil may be a brutal dance coach but my heart tells me ortho is much worse. he helps choreograph but completely forgets that his joints dont work like people do

he also overestimates everyones strength solely due to the fact that physically, the club members are stronger than idia due to the rigorous training regimes

his stage directions be like “okay and you can move the set when you exit stage left”

like.. the entire set?? one person?? 

ortho gets wayyyyy too invested in his character but now vil is using ortho as an example to keep the rest of the club members in line aiuhdffgh

ortho is the biggest instigator for out-of-pocket improv because its like a livewire reaction. one person goes in a crazy direction and the rest of the club is following suit

no one knows what the original script is anymore ijsdhfgn

[haveyouplayedthisirlgame-poll]

Green Glass Doors is a party game where one player creates a (usually spelling-based) rule for what can be brought through a hypothetical set of green glass doors. The other players take turns asking if certain items can go through the doors, aiming to find the commonality between permitted items and therefore deduce what the rule is.

[post-futurism]

literally i am SO obsessed with hugh grant having starred in Maurice (1987), being what is quite literally his FIRST movie and he is GAY and in 2018 starring in A Very English Scandal alongside Ben Whishaw in which he is VERY GAY!!!!!! and how Daniel Craig’s final bond movie FINALLY confirmed that Ben Whishaw as Q is GAY!!! and has a husband thereby continuing the fact that every role ben whishaw has played since he came out has been a gay character and part of me thinks that Q being gay in Bond couldn’t have happened without daniel craig’s influence? and that in glass onion Daniel Craig IS GAY with HuGH GRANT and how hugh grant once said that rachel weisz notoriously HATES him but later retracted that and how rachel weisz is married to daniel craig and how rachel??? weisz??? was in disobEDIENCE the LITERALLY MOST ICONIC LESBIAN FILM like what is going on here what is going on here what is goin ON 

[weirdraccoon]

Harry *storming into the Sallow house, angry and pouty, waving his new glasses around*: I hate getting new glasses! They never get them right the first time. I wish Sirius would let me get that potion to correct my eyesight.

Ominis *sitting comfortably on the sofa while his wand scans some exams*: Oh you poor child. It must be horrible to be unable to see without glasses.

Tom, MC and Sebastian who were sitting around too doing who knows what: *snorting and laughing*

Harry *sheepish*: I'm sorry, Mr. Sallow.

[sleepyorchidmonster]

Do you ever wonder if Riddle's UM puts a target on his back?

I mean, Azul definetely wants to steal Off With Your Head, not to mention STYX has a gadget that does the same thing...

I once joked that, whenever there is an assassination plot or something against NRC, the first thing the assailants do is put Riddle out of comission, to the point that Crowley even said that "There's no assassins in the school, they would've attacked Riddle by now!"

But what if the attackers decided to brainwash him instead? If you're going to challenge some of the strongest mages in the world, having their classmate with a broken UM under mind control is a good advantage.

Except that Riddle is INCREDIBLY stubborn, and the sight of an emotionless Riddle blindly following orders and almost overblotting from trying to fight the spell just made the students angrier (they won't say they're worried, since they're NRC students. Well, aside from Kalim and Silver).

The assassins then decided that it's better to just fight with magic than try to cancel their opponent's powers. Malleus and Leona throwing punches was already bad enough, but then Floyd came in for the squeeze and HERE COMES CATER WITH THE STELL CHAIR!!!!

The scariest one was Kalim, though. He does not appreciate people hurting his friends (also the whole Book 4 thing kinda traumatised him, even if he forgave Jamil).

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

sooooooooooo for the NRC family day interactions, i'm curious to see what would happen if riddle and step-dad ashengrotto met in the wild, because riddle has expressed that recently he's gotten interested in law. it would b cool for him to chat with the canon lawyer who taught azul about laws n contracts.

plus the whole, riddle being unsure actually because his whole life his parents had plans for him and planned for him on becoming a healer like them, but now he's interested in something else. n while i kno he reads about law, it would give him a lot of insight to actually, speak to someone who does this for a living, who maybe even suggests ideas of finding a way to combine both medicine and law, like medical law (branch of law) or medical jurisprudence (branch of medicine).

and other stuff too.

idk i just think a conversation between the two could be interesting, even outside of like, riddle's own interest in law; like another interesting thing would b his whole, family/homelife situation & the fact that riddle hints that his parents don't really get along that well + knowing that step-dad ashengrotto met mama ashengrotto while she was filing for divorce... just lots of ideas in me brain i think.

idk hopefully this isn't unintelligible sdfjsdklfd thank youuuuuuu

Thank you for submitting this really interesting idea ^^ This one is really long compared to the others, so I slapped a cut in to make scrolling by easier. This fic borrows ideas from a theory that I talked about a few days ago?

I don't know if I've ever mentioned this before, but I think it's cool that Azul not only has a stepdad, but actually gets along with him. Rarely do I see divorce portrayed as a positive thing (I mean, how often do we see wicked stepparents or a child that refuses to accept the stepparent), so Azul's family was really refreshing to see.

Not me taking inspiration from the divorce lawyer in Enchanted and various characters from Ace Attorney for stepdaddy Ashengrotto—

Family means Nobody is Left Behind or Forgotten.

The cafeteria was packed, and the ghost chefs were working overtime to feed the influx of hungry guests. Staff, students, and their family members had been coming in and out throughout the day, leaving not many tables open and the food line long. Some had taken to sitting cross-legged on the floor or spilling out into the hallway to make space for new arrivals.

One look at the gaggle of people along the walls and on the ground, and Mrs. Rosehearts had turned up her nose. "I won't have you sitting like a barbarian, Riddle. We'll find you a proper seat. Look, there’s one now. You sit—I’ll see what they have available on the menu and fetch you an appropriate meal.”

“Yes, mother.”

Riddle shifted uncomfortably at a cramped table. He dared not falter in his posture. Back straight, head high, hands neatly folded in his lap. He was a rose among those deemed the weeds called riffraff.

… It’s noisy, Riddle noted.

Indeed, it was. The cafeteria buzzed with activity, students exchanging chatter and laughter with their loved ones. Sharing bites of food and stories, nourishing their bellies and their souls.

A memory clad in flowers filled his mind.

“Riddle!”

He was back in the Heartslabyul gardens, colorful decorations and card soldiers in every direction. Flamingos and hedgehogs at the ready, the roses painted red, a dormouse in the tea pot. Cakes, tarts, and finger sandwiches sliced up and served with tea.

Ace and Deuce were arguing over something silly again. By the sumptuous spread of snacks, Cater was snagging pictures before so much as a bite. In the memory, Riddle made to tell them off, only to be stopped by the vice dorm leader at his side.

“They have so much energy,” Trey had remarked. “It’s livelier than usual today.”

Yes, that was the right word for it. Not noisy, but lively.

How curious that dining at Night Raven College is like this. At home…

There was a lone platter set for him, a sad, limp little square of food in the center. His mother, arms folded, to the right. His father, trembling in his chair, to the lift. Raised voices and scathing remarks.

Some days the dining room was empty altogether, save for himself and stacks of textbooks. When he did crossword puzzles and sudoku, the vocabulary and the numbers kept him company.

His heart twinged. Riddle frowned and curled a hand over his chest, as if trying to soothe the pain.

What is this? Why… do I feel this way?

"Excuse me, young man."

He jolted upright.

An older gentleman in glasses was beside him. His hair, peppered with streaks of white, was neat, and he was dressed in an even neater suit. He smelled like salt wrapped in a sea breeze, faint citrus and sunshine.

The stranger gestured to the spot beside Riddle. “Pardon me if I disturbed your train of thought. I wanted to ask if this seat was taken. I need a quick place to rest my legs, then I’ll be out of your way.”

Riddle took a quick glance at the line—which still snaked around the room, but at least his mother had vanished from view. Relief. “It’s open. Please, sit.”

“Thank you.” The man slipped in next to Riddle. He sighed, just as relieved as the boy was. “Much appreciated. I hope I’m not stealing this seat from one of your parents.”

“Not to worry, sir. Only my mother is with me today, and it seems like it will be quite a while before she returns," Riddle reassured him. “My father is preoccupied with work, so he was unable to attend."

It was partially true. Whenever possible, his parents actively avoided each other. Strategically taking specific hospital shifts just so happened to be a means to that end.

"I'm here with my wife and son myself, they're perusing the food. A shame about your father. Really. Perhaps he'll be able to attend next year."

"Perhaps."

Riddle hoped not.

He looked away, dodging the man's eyes. Fearing that his own would betray him.

A glint of gold snagged his sight, and Riddle's heart leapt. Pinned to the stranger's lapel was a small pin depicting the scales of justice.

The man took notice. "I see you've spotted my bar association badge."

"You're a lawyer, sir?" Riddle's question came out small.

"That's right." He tilted his head to one side. His smile was slight, yet encouraging. "Might you have an interest in law, young man?"

"Ah, well..." Riddle instinctively looked to the line again before his gaze darted back to his conversational partner. "Y-Yes, I suppose you could say that. However, I'm aware that it is a big commitment, and I have already resolved to pursue magical medicine."

"A career like that can be fulfilling as well," the man said kindly. "I have colleagues that specialize in medical malpractice and negligence. We also sometimes work with forensic scientists for certain cases.

"There is most certainly crossover between the legal and healthcare sectors. You could consider looking into those fields as a middle ground between your two interests."

Riddle blinked.

"Did I overstep my bounds?"

"No, I just..." Hesitation. "I'm not used to speaking like this."

"About your future?"

No, Riddle wanted to correct him, it's being given advice and suggestions, rather than expectations and orders.

"About straying from the path," he said, a quick half-truth. "It's difficult to compromise, even if the options exist out there."

"Hmm." The man nodded understandingly. "Changing course can be scary, yes. I don't fault you for thinking that way. If it would help in any way, you are free to ask me questions about my own experience. I'm no medical lawyer, but hearing it from the horse's mouth has helped some of my clients before."

"You would offer such a thing...?"

The man's eyes shone with the trace of a contained laugh. "I don't charge for the first consultation," he joked.

"Then..." Hope crept into Riddle's voice. "Could you tell me about your own specialization?"

"My firm mainly deals with cases of divorce."

Divorce.

The word was bitter on Riddle's tongue as he swallowed it. But the lawyer spoke it with such ease, like it was nothing more than the weather forecast for the day.

Divorce, divorce.

It had always been an option for Riddle's parents since the first problems had started between them, but never seriously considered, never discussed. His mother would sooner die than confess she was anything but right, that she had made the mistake of choosing the wrong man. And what would the community think? What would they say?

As a child most foolish, Riddle had prayed to the Queen of Hearts to share her secret to a successful marriage. No answer ever came, and it was then that he realized: divorce was never in the cards for his parents.

The man carefully took in Riddle's frozen expression. "It happens. I see it a lot in my line of work—and it is one hundred percent normal. People are like castles in the sand, you see. They change, their feelings change. They fall out of love. Part of my job is to ensure that the separation occurs smoothly.

"There is stigma attached to the concept of divorce, that it ruins families and brings them great shame. But sometimes a family is better apart than together, and they can find new happiness once they've picked up the pieces. Cutting ties can be the most liberating feeling in the entire world.

"I speak from experience myself. I met a lovely, bright-minded woman while she was going through her own divorce proceedings. Now that woman is my wife, and her son, my own."

Riddle's brows knitted. Disbelief and confusion crowned his features. "It almost sounds like a fairy tale. Can such a drastic change truly lead to happiness?"

"For me, it did. It may not be the case for you, because you and I are different people."

"Th-Then tell me!!" Riddle stood, slamming his hands on the table. Food and silverware rattled, people stared. He didn't care, his volume spiking. "How? How do I do that...? Please tell me. I don't... I don't know how to do it myself."

"That, I cannot say."

"Why not?! You... You said you would help me!"

"I did say that, didn't I? I said I would help you by talking about my own experiences. Tricky thing, wording. It's easy to overlook the fine print." The man pointed at him. "The rest is in your hands."

"I can't do a single thing," Riddle protested. It felt like roses were choking him. "My hands are tied. My path was determined a long time ago. Change is absolutely unacceptable."

The lawyer regarded him coolly. "Let me tell you something, young man. The law is the law because there is a human element to it, no matter how impartial, how black and white, we try to be. We write the laws, act on them, and interpret them. Likewise, you, too, are responsible for that interpretation.

"What is right, what is wrong, and what role you must play therein... these are things you alone determine, whether that be in career, in love, or in life. You are your own judge, and the decider of your own destiny. It is something only you are capable of, and no one else but you."

Riddle reeled his head, reacting as though he'd just been decked.

Right and wrong... The role I must play... Something only I can do?

Someone had told him something similar not too long ago. The words harsher then, and paired with a sound punch to the face.

"Is that all you are?!" Ace had demanded, fist clenched, still raw from making contact with his dorm leader's cheek. "An extension of your mom? Can't you think for yourself?"

The twinge to his chest had returned. Stronger, sharper. Like thorns tearing into his skin.

"... I see," Riddle said slowly. "I think I understand it a little better now."

"I'm glad to hear it." The man's smile broadened. He looked at something beyond Riddle, then rose from his seat. "Well, if you'll excuse me... It seems my family has finished their business. We should get going now."

"Of course. Thank you very much for speaking with me, sir." He humbly lowered his head to the man,

A voice came from behind the redhead. "Oya, what a surprise. If it isn't Riddle-san."

He immediately bolted up in horror. The dorm leader of Octavinelle stood before him, lips cocked into a smirk. A woman with the same silvery hair was next to him, cut in a sleek black gown and with seashells in her jewelry.

"Wha--?! Azul...?! What are you..." Riddle faltered with both his words and his calm.

"Oh? Is it a crime to come collect one's stepfather?" The merman sighed dramatically. "I was going to come over sooner, you know—but it looked as though you two were having quite the engaging conversation. I thought it rude to interrupt and cut it short."

Riddle's head whipped back to the lawyer. "Th-This is your stepfather?!"

"Azul, I didn't realize this lad was your friend. We were just having a nice talk about career goals."

"Career goals, you say? My, that sounds so interesting." There was something unsavory, slimy even, about the way Azul emphasized his interest. "I'm jealous, Riddle-san. We've shared our dreams with one another before, but never on such an intimate level."

"And just who in their right mind do you think would willingly divulge that information to you? Don't act as though we're friends."

Azul smiled wryly. "Aren't we? After all, we've been through both hell and high water together."

"It sounds to me like you boys are good chums," Mr. Ashengrotto remarked, exchanging raised eyebrows with his wife, "though you certainly have a strange way of showing it."

"Why haven't you told us about him, Azul?" his mother asked. "I'd love to have him over for dinner."

"Riddle-san can be surprisingly shy. I wouldn't wish to cast a spotlight on him."

"Who's shy here?! All you've been doing since you showed up is put me on the spot!"

Mrs. Ashengrotto put a hand over her mouth, stifling a chuckle. “If you visit us, Azul could invite his other friends—do you know them? The Leech twins. You could all get to know each other, and that could help you get out of your shell.”

“N-No thank you, ma’am!!” Riddle said (perhaps a little too loudly, and too quickly). The farther away I stay from those sketchy brothers, the better!! I wouldn’t be caught dead trying to cozy up to them!

“No? Maybe another time then. The offer is always there. Come to us when you're comfortable with it, dear.

"I guarantee you won't regret it," Mr. Ashengrotto chimed in. "She makes the best food I've ever had under the sea. Azul could pack away an entire bucket of her fried..."

Azul loudly cleared his throat. "While this chat has been amusing, I believe it's time we stopped hounding the poor, unfortunate soul and moved to the next item on our itinerary. I'm sure that Riddle-san is busy with his own matters as well."

"Yes, my mother will be back soon with lunch."

"That so? We'll be on our way then. Wouldn't want to disrupt your time together." Mr. Ashengrotto tenderly squeezed his wife's arm. His other hand found its way onto Azul's shoulder. "Have a happy Family Day, Riddle."

"Happy family day to you too."

With that, Azul and his parents departed. Their mouths moved, their expressions changed, playing off of one another. Saying things Riddle couldn't hear, nor understand even if he could hear.

The rose-red ruler, entrenched in a sea of people, was left with many thoughts racing through his head. Those gathered in the cafeteria, Heartslabyul, the Ashengrottos...

One question lingered like the last vestiges of sunlight on a lazy summer day.

Are these... what families are meant to be like?

[mihyy12]

Ilustración de una versión alternativa de Tom Riddle rodeado de lirios marchitos en una catedral con enormes vidrieras verdes al fondo y pequeñas serpientes escondidas.