#god this entire book is just giving voice to so many things i think about like wtf hes even talking about the things i bitch about in scifi

[oflgtfol]

“Other shortcomings [in communicating science] are evident in television science fiction programming. Star Trek, for example, despite its charm and strong international and interspecies perspective, often ignores the most elementary scientific facts. The idea that Mr. Spock could be a cross between a human being and a life-form independently evolved on the planet Vulcan is genetically far less probable than a successful cross of a man and an artichoke… There must be dozens of alien species on various Star Trek TV series and movies. Almost all we spend any time with are minor variants of humans. This is driven by economic necessity, costing only an actor and a latex mask, but it flies in the face of the stochastic nature of the evolutionary process. If there are aliens, almost all of them I think will look devastatingly less human than Klingons and Romulans.”

- Carl Sagan, The Demon-Haunted World: Science as a Candle in the Dark

[munsonsmixtapes]

https://www.tumblr.com/munsonsmixtapes/747871761169793024/does-anyone-have-any-steve-or-eddie-requests

U ASK AND U SHALL RECIVE🫡

Eddie and reader layin in bed, reader half asleep, laying on Eddie’s chest with her leg on his waist(yk like the cute little thing where he’s holding her thigh on him?)

And he’s reading the lord of the rings, and starts muttering aloud, and the reader goes “just read it out loud”

And he’s just 😀 “huh”

then reader goes “you’re already practically saying it out loud, just read it to me”

Eddie swears he couldn’t fall more in love, like he thinks you’re already perfect but your Laying on him, In His bed, In his home, asking him to read you his favourite book?!

He’s going to get a ring tomorrow!

Or just give you one of his and slip it on your ring finger while reading or explaing the plot up to that point🤭

Thanks so much for your request!

Eddie x fem!reader

word count: 1k

There were many things you loved about Eddie. You loved his sense of humor even though no one else seemed to get his jokes. You loved how smart he was and how he always seemed to have interesting facts on hand. You loved how passionate he was about the things he loved and that he had countless books about it all. But the thing that you loved most about Eddie was the fact that he always seemed to read everything aloud.

Whether it was something he had gotten in the mail or a message he had gotten on his beeper, it didn’t matter. It seemed to annoy everyone else, but it was something that you had grown to really like about him. You wanted to hear his voice any chance you got, even if the words directed towards you. Especially when you were falling asleep and he was reading one of his books. It had become your favorite lullaby.

Lately, though, you had noticed that he had been doing it less and less. He would no longer whisper along with the subtitles on the TV or mumble the words that were written in his books. Everything was quiet, his voice no longer filling the house you shared. You hadn’t realized how much you had missed it until he stopped.

The two of you were snuggled up in your bed on a lazy Sunday. You were snuggled up into his side with your leg draped across his waist exactly where he liked it. One hand was resting your bare thigh while the other was holding his very beat up copy of Lord of the Rings.

You rested your chin on his chest, admiring the way he has his hair tied back and the glasses he always wore to read. He hadn’t even noticed you looking at him, his lips moving as his eyes scanned over the words in his book. He had read it so many times that you were convinced that he could have quoted the entire thing word for word.

His eyes finally locked onto yours and he set his book down, now favoring you. His now free hand rested on your back, leisurely rubbing it, something he always did to show his love for you without having to say the words.

“What?” He asked, looking down at you, his brown doe eyes boring into yours.

“Nothing,” you shook your head. “I just love you.”

“I love you too, sweetheart,” he replied, a smile kicking up at the corners of his mouth. “Now are you going to tell me what’s really on your mind?”

Sometimes you hated that he was always able to read you like a book. How he could somehow read your thoughts, knowing exactly what was going on inside your brain before you did. Perhaps that was why you worked so well together. He always knew what you wanted or needed and was prepared to give it to you.

“It’s just-” you cut yourself off, trying to get your thoughts together.

“Hm?” His eyebrows furrowed and his tongue poked through his lips, a telltale sign that he was deep I thought.

“You’re not reading aloud anymore.” A pout made its way onto your face, your lip jutting out. God, you were just so cute.

“I’m not what?” You had said the words so softly that he hadn’t heard the last part. He wanted to know what you were so upset about so he could fix it. He hated seeing you so upset.

“You’re not reading out loud anymore.” You were now straddling his waist, his hands moving to rest on your thighs.

“You’re right,” he nodded. He didn’t think you had even noticed let alone missed him doing it now that he had stopped.

“Why not?” You let out a little whine, your hands resting on his chest. It warmed his heart that you liked hearing his voice so much.

“Well-I guess I just figured that it annoyed you.” He chewed on his bottom lip-something he always did when he got nervous. You were quick to pull it from under his teeth. Your hand rested on his cheek, rubbing along the skin with the pad of your thumb.

“Why would I think that?” You eyebrows furrowed. “I love it.”

“You do?” His hand moved up to rest on top of yours.

“Of course!” You let out a laugh, wondering why he had been so confused that you had enjoyed hearing him reading. “I love hearing your voice.”

“I’m sorry, honey. I was just letting the guys stupid comments get to me. They hate when I do that so I just assumed you did too.” His band mates had complained so many times about him reading their song lyrics aloud and after hearing the complaints so many times, he had just jumped to the conclusion that you had hated his little quirk as well. He supposed he should have asked, but it made him feel too vulnerable despite how long the two of you had been together.

“Well, you were wrong. So you can do it around me as much as you like. In fact, I require it.” At that, Eddie was quick to take you into his arms, peppering your face in kisses as you let out little giggles. He then finally captured your lips between his in a lingering kiss.

“Now read to me, Eds.”

You curled yourself up into his side and he was quick to pick the book up, turning it to the first page so he could start from the beginning. He held the book to where you could see it as well and cleared his throat before he read the first page. One page turned into two and before the two of your knew it, he had flown through the first book and had moved into the next.

You could have stayed right there for the rest of your life and been content. It was just you and your man and his huge stack of books that had been practically begging to be read. You thought Eddie really was meant to read aloud. He put on a different voice for each character and used his hands as he spoke, really enveloping you in every single story he read.

You fell asleep after a few hours, but that didn’t stop Eddie. He continued to read, knowing that if he had stopped, you would have had something to say about it, somehow noticing from your deep sleep. He couldn’t believe that he had actually thought you had hated hearing him read. And that you had loved it so much that you had noticed when he stopped.

He looked down as he started the third book, looking down at you with so much love. He had really lucked out with you. No one had loved him so much that they were content listening to him read when they could have done anything else. At that moment, he just knew that he wanted to marry you and was going to have to take time to go buy a ring.

[furicookiebndz]

Lucifer x !FemReader : My old friend

Hello everyone, it is my first time writing this, i hope it will be good enough, have fun! This fan art isn't mine. Full credits to the amazingly talented artist/creator.

It has been thousands of years since evil began.

Lucifer, whose pride blinded him, attempted to dethrone the creator, only to ultimately fail and be banished from Paradise.

Lilith, who refused to submit to Adam, in turn fled from this magical place, but which hides many facades.

Yet few people know that with them, a third person flew out of Paradise. And even rarer are people who know the cause, 3 to be precise.

However, behind this unusual act lie very dark secrets, seen as…

-Can you stop, Vag'? You're giving me a headache.

The young woman turned her head towards the source of this execrable voice, a spider who was visibly lying carefree on the sofa, arms behind her head, a bored expression on her face.

Refraining from answering him, she continued:

Tragic, some thought it was another rebellious woman, others a fallen angel because of a serious crime, but that wasn't logical, what's worse than to confront the creator?"

-That doesn't help all of us, the young woman noted, running her hand through her hair, frustrated.

-It would be beneficial to have her on our side, especially if she has such a significant influence on the world of the living and beyond, Charlie concluded thoughtfully.

-But she hid from the world, living as a hermit. Many think it's a myth, but given what's been happening lately, I believe it's much more present than sinners think.

Vaggie rubbed her temples, trying to come up with an idea.

-Who the hell are you talking about? I hate it when you pretend to be Sherlock and leave me like the old cookie in the back of the cupboard.

-Are you interested in what we do? retorted Vaggie sarcastically

-No, more about why you were busting my balls, joked Angel.

-You don't even have one, asshole, mumbled quietly Husk, taking a sip of his cheap booze.

-Want to check~? It is free for you kitty cat.

-Not even for a thousand balls, growled quietly Husk, who was beginning to lose his patient.

-Ouuh finally a price there is progress, Daddy, the spider sent him a kiss

Alastor, who was reading a book by the fireplace, decided to speak

-Charlie, Darling, you seem concerned about this person Let me see…

He seemed surprised for a moment, before smiling more, if possible.

-My my, what a terrible coincidence. The person you are looking for is one of the most sought after. Didn't Lucifer tell you about Lady (Y/N)?

-Um… We're not exactly talking about all that-

“Daddy issues,” Husk muttered.

Alastor continued:

-As reported in this document, she flew away shortly after your parents. She was a person living in Heaven, she was not human, but not an angel entirely though, she had two pairs of wings, although she is the appearance of a mortal, yet she had her own power, not to be underestimated. She embodied humor, justice and determination. In short, all these things that are way too boring-

-Cut it short, Alastor, Vaggie said, snapping her fingers.

-But when Lucifer challenged God, she did not follow him, not because she had to beat him, but because he knew just as well as she did that what he was doing was wrong. For the first time in her life she felt an immense disappointment in the love he had once inspired in her, and the semblance of a relationship that was perhaps tending to end disappeared with the appearance of the first demon, your father, Charlie.

However, you are aware that shortly after the creation of Lilith, she quickly became friends with your mother, and when she flew away from Paradise, and she learned the cause, she entered in a black anger, so black that Gabriel had difficulty in containing it, Until then, she had always been obedient, never contesting the decisions, which were of infallible Justice, but this departure had torn away part of her herself. She confronted the lord, she tried to rally the others to her cause, but nothing changed. Disappointed, she left that place, and no one ever saw her again.

There was a heavy silence for a moment, before Angel said:

-So…Is she still a virgin?

Vaggie rolled her eyes before Charlie had an idea:

I'm sure she's not that far away. Maybe I should ask my father to contact her again. She must care about him, at least I hope so, and if I convince her, Gabriel won't be able to object!

Vaggie refrained from adding a comment, she knew it was too good to be able to do it, but in front of her girlfriend's adorable face, she couldn't refuse anything.

______________________________________________________________

-No, Lucifer said firmly, before Charlie could even finish his idea.

-But dad-

-End of discussion, I don't want to hear anything, he turned around and mechanically squeezed the rubber duck in his hand, like an anti-stress ball.

Lucifer seemed elsewhere, deep in thought. His friend, his old friend…

.

.

.

“Luciferrrrr!” A burst of joy appeared as she walked towards him, a smile on her lips, a book in her hands.

Lucifer as usual had a lyre in his hands. He looked up at Y/N and smiled.

One discussion led to another, he shared his ideas about the mortal world, while she agreed with some and shared her opinion on others. They would sometimes just stay silent, or she would read aloud from a book, and he would then accompany her with his lyre.

Such a beautiful memory…

.

.

.

Why Lucifer?! Why did you do this?

This same friend was there with her eyes filled with tears, disappointed in him.

Lucifer looked down. One mistake, just one mistake, had caused him to lose those he considered family, and his closest friend.

He wanted to tell her that it was just a misunderstanding, that it was for the best, but the damage was already done.

He took Lilith's hand and without a word, left for their new home.

The young woman, in tears, could only watch them leave, the man she loved and her friend, without being able to do anything, because her principles prevented her. Gabriel placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, and said nothing. If she knew, he couldn't imagine how she would have reacted

.

.

.

-Dad?

Lucifer seemed to come out of his thoughts and focused on a family portrait. Lilith was already gone, after their separation he only had his daughter left, and after a second of thought he sighed and said:

-I'll see what I can do…

-It's true? Oh thank you Dad, thank you thank you thank you!, cried Charlie enthusiastically.

She took him in her arms, and Lucifer said to himself that finally, if having a hug from his daughter meant having to seek the 7 rings of Hell and even the beyond, he would do it without complaining.

Now all that remained was to find it, the most complicated part…

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lucifer, Charlie and the hotel members thought for several days, using all their knowledge and powers to find her. If she was neither in Hell, nor in Heaven, or even in the mortal world, she must be between the latter options-

Lucifer suddenly had an idea, remembering a conversation they had shared long ago, and he cast an incantation, which opened a portal to a world- no, a unique place, so messy and blurry, and yet so… familiar, as if he were…

“In the middle of a dream,” Charlie whispered softly. The rest of the team followed her, looking around curiously. Lucifer asked himself so many questions, was it a place where souls rested between life and death? He did not know it. After all, the soul left the body for a while when it slept, that would explain the place.

-Who are you? I sense human souls, but something else…

They saw several women advancing, of great beauty, similar to fairies, but armed, ready to defend themselves, if it was not for another who stopped them by raising her hand, she advanced slowly, and Lucifer recognized her completely. right now.

-(Y/N)..Lucifer seemed upset to see her, and tried to pull himself together by talking to himself. "Ok, Ok. It's going to be okay buddy, you can do it, you can do it", When he met her gaze, he lost all his courage and hid behind Charlie.

-Dad!

-What? I-I'm just covering your back Charlie.

-At least what I thought of you is true, you're just a sissy Lucifer, Alastor sneered.

You looked at him for a moment, the man you had loved for thousands of years, it was..strange. You didn't know whether you should greet him or hit him.

-Lucifer, what is the honor of this visit worth to me? In 10,000 years you have never had the decency to come visit me.

Sarcasm. Something unusual about you, he couldn't help but admire you. Your two pairs of wings were now grey, but your eyes were still this soft (e/c) shade, but now full of resentment, and perhaps.. mockery?

-And you, you must be his daughter, mhh?

You moved closer to her and observed her suspiciously, while she was sweating profusely, and Vaggie seemed on the edge on attacking you, and to her surprise, you smiled widely and took her in your arms, with surprising strength.

-My lord you are his carbon copy, so pretty~, you squish her cheek cheeks and gush about her, while she laughs awkwardly.

Everyone was stunned by how fast the tension dissipates, and the women behind you giggle, seemingly aware by how fast your emotions tend to change. Lucifer smiles, maybe he still had a chance..

-But you seem so polite, unlike some, you cast a dark look at Lucifer, and greeted the others with a sympathetic and curious look, their offering to sit down for a while to talk.

...maybe not finally.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

-If I understood everything, you created a hotel to rehabilitate sinners… and are trying to convince Heaven, is that right?

She nodded and Lucifer tried to add something, but you stopped him:

-I don't speak with traitors and liars, especially if they forget to send me a life message for eons.

Lucifer doesn't say anything wanting to make anything worse. He knew he was wrong, and sighed heavily.

(Y/N)-1 Lucifer-0.

-Damn, this girl is awesome, Angel whispered excitedly.

Vaggie continued:

-Lady (Y/N), you still have decent relationship with heaven.Could you try talking to some highers-up about it? Like Gabrie-

-No, this thing is no longer part of my circle of close friends, I can still try to talk about it again with Sera and Emily, but I can't do anything with the other weirdo.

Charlie felt hopeless, and she took your hands and looked at you with a miserable expression.

-I beg you, you must speak to him, my people are dying every year at the hands of the exorcists, and I-I cannot stand by and do nothing. Can you try..?

At his beaten puppy look, you widened your eyes, it was exactly-

Please don't tell them where I was, Lucifer pleaded with adorable eyes. You sighed but smiled, nodding your head.

-Well, i will. But I'm not promising anything though-

-Thank you thank you thank you, she hugged you, and you hugged her back with a smile.

Lucifer felt his heart beat faster, these two women who are precious to him have finally met, and got along better than he expected.

Now all he had to do was sort out one last problem.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Explanations were made. You listened patiently, and after a while you answered:

-Why Lucifer, didn't you tell me before? I-I thought I was your friend.

Lucifer held her gaze, and for the first time in millennia he took his courage in both hands and took hers:

-I didn't want to see your disappointed look, I know I made a mistake, but I only thought about doing the right thing. And I-

-You got scared?

He nodded, and you sighed:

-I don't blame you, at least not anymore.

He raised his eyes, feeling a bit of hope, and feeling Charlie's encouraging look, he continued:

-So, can we try again? I mean our relationship- Well our friendship!

He blushed slightly and you chuckled softly:

-Yes, always Lucifer.

[typicalopposite]

Bucktommy 🌞

🫡🫡🫡 I picked watch a sunrise. And it spiraled into this! I hope you like it

<3<3<3

They both have the next day off, but Tommy’s shift ends late. So Buck insists Tommy needs to get some sleep, so he should go home, and then Buck can come over in the morning. Tommy is reluctant but finally agrees. 

The sun has long been set. Buck has cleaned his entire loft, and packed a bag for the morning. His belly is full, he has bathed, and he is… wide awake. Nothing he wants to watch on TV, no new book he is interested in enough to start reading. He doesn’t even feel like scrolling the internet for the next insane fact rabbit hole he can tumble down, then fill everyone in about later. All he can think of is everything he wants to do with Tommy, and for Tommy, and to Tommy, once he is over there. 

He lays back into his pillows and tries to just force his eyes to stay closed. Then his phone rings. It’s Tommy.

“Do you have any idea what time it is?” Buck says, barely able to contain the smile on his face (he wonders if Tommy can hear it in his voice). “You’re supposed to be sleeping.”

“Mmm, I tried… but I just couldn’t stop thinking of you.” 

“Yeah?” 

“Oh yeah. It’s really becoming a thing, you always being on my mind,” Tommy says, and Buck’s heart skips a beat. “Wouldn’t really be a problem if you were here…”

Buck laughs, “You just worked a 48,” he says. “And i can’t promise either of us would be getting much rest if I was there right now.” 

“You say that like it’s a bad thing,” Tommy replies. Buck rolls onto his side and wraps his free arm around himself, pretending it is Tommy’s arm. He sighs. “Hmm… are you thinking about me, now?” 

“Maybe.” Buck feels his cheeks heat the slightest bit; he feels the smirk on his lips. 

“And what about me are you thinking of?” 

“Right now? Just your arms wrapped around me…” Buck says, tightening his hold on himself. “I love when you hold me.” 

“I’d love to be holding you right now…”

“You need to sleep.”

“I know, I know,” Tommy sighs. “But first, is there anything else?”

“Anything else?” 

“That you’re thinking about?” 

Buck laughs: “Not really…” 

“Come on, I’m sure there’s something,” Tommy presses. 

“Going to bed, like you should already have done,” Buck teases. He hears Tommy scoff, like he knows Buck wasn’t about to be able to fall asleep either. “I'm thinking about what we’re going to do tomorrow.”

Tommy hums, Buck can just picture his soft smile, and his tired eyes… he needs to sleep. “What are we going to do?” 

“You will see when I get there, tomorrow.” 

“But I just want an idea on what to expect… please baby.” And that’s all it takes for Buck to melt into the mattress. God he’s so gone on this guy. He tells Tommy about his plans to take him to this little farmers market Bobby showed him. How he wanted to get the ingredients for a new dish he found, and how he wants to buy Tommy his own apron… How he wants to see him in it while they make dinner together… maybe just in that. “Hmm sounds like you have a lot planned…” and okay, to be fair, he does. He tries to fit in as much together time as he can when they get days off together; tries to make as many memories. “What about after dinner?” 

“Tommy… go to sleep!” 

“But I’m so curious,” Tommy says, and he sounds so tired. “You said you want me in just an apron… and you're not going to tell me where that might lead?” 

“Oh I think you know where that’s gonna lead…” 

“I’d much rather you tell me… in very explicit detail.” Buck rolls his eyes, his cheeks now burning from how long he’s been smiling. He gives Tommy what he wants… maybe he secretly wanted to linger on that thought a little more himself. “I don’t know if I can wait until tomorrow for that…” Tommy sighs through the phone. 

“You’re gonna have to, cause you’re going to bed now…” Buck tells him. 

“What if I wanted to know about how your day went, first?” 

“I can tell you tomorrow…” Buck groans. “It was boring anyway.”

“Then tell me, and maybe you’ll bore me to sleep.”

Buck turns his face into his pillow to muffle his laugh. “Or you could just go to sleep!” There’s a silence, and Buck knows he’s being long distance pouted at. “Fine…” 

This continues—the back and forth of Tommy convincing Buck to share some random story, and Buck ultimately doing so. “What can I say, I love the sound of your voice,” Tommy says, and Bucks insides erupt into butterflies. “Hey Evan?”

“Yeah?” 

“Look outside…”

Buck does and he laughs. Through the buildings, in the small section of the horizon visible from his bedroom window, Buck can see the very beginning of the sunrise. 

“It’s morning,” Tommy says, sounding very proud of himself. “And you should have an Uber there for you in about— now. They're about to pull up.”

“You sent me an Uber?” 

“Couldn’t have you driving here on no sleep,” Tommy says. 

Buck feels the strain of his smile in his cheeks again and throws his blanket off, grabbing his bag and slipping on his shoes. “I’m on my way,” he laughs, pulling his door closed behind him.

[werewolf-witchboy]

Druig X Eternal! Reader

✨ (Gender Neutral) ✨

No Warnings.

After many years of being split up, the Eternals must come together as a team again. Nobody seems to know where you've been all these years, so they've gone to the one person who might know of your whereabouts...

Little did they know that you're a lot closer than they thought.

"You have given me a lot of bad news in one go, my lady." Druig's tone is a lot less welcoming after he's been told the horrible truth.

"You and (Y/n) are the main parts of our big plan. We need you both to get through this." Sersi explained again. "Will you help us?"

"We can't find (Y/n)." Ikaris cut to the chase, obviously not ecstatic about needing Druig.

"All of us have searched across almost the whole planet." Sersi subtly encouraged Ikaris away from Druig, sensing the tension already rising between them. "All of (Y/n)'s favorite countries, every area we've had somekind of special or significant moment, we've even asked elders who've written many books about (Y/n). Found not a trace of where they could possibly be."

Drugs arms stayed crossed. "I don't think it's my business to just give out personal information like that." Once his fellow Eternals showed up, his peace was interrupted and he now has a headache.

He knows he told them to "make themselves at home," but he didn't expect them to drop all of this shocking news on him about their true purpose as Eternals, and then interrogate him about your location.

"Do you all remember this forest? Beautiful." Druig walked around the room with his hands clasped behind his back, trying to make small talk and steer the topic away from (Y/n). "It was the last place that we all lived together." His tone held some sorrow at the memories.

"I've protected these people for 20 generations now. From the outside world, and from themselves."

Druig towered over Kingo's valete, Karun. "Your kind, my friend, you will be responsible for your own extinction one day. Don't you think?"

Karun looked a little intimidated, but he answered honestly.

"I think that we must learn from our mistakes and do better, sir. You must not give up hope."

Druig did not seem to like his answer, expressing so by possessing Kingo's valet and proceeding to throw his camera against a wall, thoroughly frightening Karun and pissing off Kingo.

"Oh, where is your sense of humor Kingo?"

"You are not a god. You know that right?"

"How ironic. Kingo, the movie star."

"I've directed some things too."

"Oh yeah? Like what?"

"Some internet content..."

"How many views?"

"I don't do it for the views-"

"Let's go. He's waisting our time." Ikaris started heading towards the door.

"We need him and (Y/n)." Sersi tried to reason.

"Ikaris!" Druig stepped in front of the taller man's path. "I missed you."

Druig was really pushing it right now. "Are you not gonna charm me or threaten me?"

"There's a third option if you'd prefer that."

"It must be heartbreaking to find out that you're not mothers favorite." Druig taunted about Ikaris not being the next chosen leader.

"I'm sure she'd be real proud about what you've been up to." Ikaris always seemed to fall for the psychic's taunting.

"Druig, this is serious." Sersi tried to butt in once more.

"I'll tell you what's serious." Druig's voice got louder as he seemed to get more annoyed.

"I've just been told that I was sent on a suicide mission for the past 7,000 years, and that my entire existence is a lie." He looked Sersi in the eyes. "So excuse me for not giving a shit about your plan right now."

Athena stepped forward, brushing away Gilgamesh's hand that attempted to stop her from engaging in the conflict. She'd been quiet this whole time, but nobody else seemed to be getting anywhere with the stubborn psychic.

"This is very important. Everything will be lost if we can't stop the celestial birth. You have to admit that we've all gained somekind of admiration for humanity. Not only will the humans be gone, but so will all of the memories we've shared on Earth. Our memories with each other." Athena turned away from the rest of the Eternals, only addressing Druig when she said her next line, hoping that she'll strike a chord in him. "Your memories with (Y/n)."

Everyone was silent.

Druig let out a heavy sigh, but before he could even open his mouth to say anything, the large wooden door creeked open slowly.

"Hey Druig, I-"

Silence still hung heavy in the room amongst the Eternals, but this time it was shock.

There you stood, slightly different from the last time they've seen you many years ago, but still you. It all made sense now, why you were nowhere they searched, even though they've literally checked everywhere.

Your voice got caught in your throat as soon as you entered the cabin filled with your old friends, whom you may also have been technically hiding from.

"Uh...bad timing." Druig's voice rang in your head. Your panicked eyes met his from across the room.

"Holy shit." Kingo was the first to speak up. "(Y/n) has been here with Druig the whole time?!"

You let out an awkward chuckle, not knowing how to reply.

"What have the two of you even been doing here together for all of these years?!" Kingo's arms flailed in the air dramatically, obviously annoyed that all of their searching was for nothing.

"Actually, don't answer that question." Sprite put her hands up when she saw the look you and Druig exchanged.

"Ohmygosh-" Ikaris pinched the bridge of his nose in disgust.

Confused, Kingo looked back and fourth between everyone. "Wha- I wasn't even aware the two of them are a thing."

Everyone turned to look at the man in purple with expressions that read "really?"

"Are you telling me that I'm the only one who didn't know?!" Kingo was still going on about it. "(Y/n) is too kind and cute for Druig!"

You couldn't help but laugh behind your hand as Druig rolled his eyes, fighting a small smirk.

You had to admit that you missed your family.

"Well I for one honestly don't care where (Y/n) has been this whole time. I'm just glad to see them again!" Gilgamesh stomped up to you and scooped you into a big bear hug, fits of giggles escaping you as he squeezed your breath away.

Laughter eventually erupts from everyone, the atmosphere a stark contrast from how it was only 5 minutes ago.

When all was settled down again, Sersi sat you down and told you everything...

The tragic death of Ajak, your wise leader and mother figure.

How your purpose is to keep a planet happy and thriving just to destroy it by creating a celestial.

How all of your memories have been erased countless times, because you've killed planets and birthed celestials countless times.

By the end of it, you were a sobbing mess. You've always been a little more sensitive than the others, so this obviously deeply soured the peppy family reunion mood you were in.

There was no question that you were going along with Phastos's plan. You wanted to keep these memories that you've spent centuries cherishing, and you wanted to watch humanity grow so much more.

When you declared your certainty about going with them, Druig was dragged in by default.

Wherever you went, he went.

You did the same for him when shit hit the fan in Tenochtitlan and he left.

You knew you'd miss the little civilization that you and Druig have helped create, but it'll still be there after you've saved the planet. When it's all over, you can go back with Druig and continue waking up next to him every morning to start a busy day of harvesting crops and handwashing laundry.

For now though, it's back to Olympia.

....................

"Well, look who it is!"

"Didn't think you'd be so glad to see me Phastos." Druig remarked with a smirk.

"I'm not. I was talking about (Y/n)." He brushed past the raven haired Eternal to embrace you.

Makkari elbowed the psychic, who had been grinning like an idiot while watching (Y/n).

"You look like a lovesick puppy." She signed.

Druig rolled his eyes, but his grin never faltered.

"Well, I for one, still can't believe it!" Kingo's appeared on the other side of Druig.

"I've never seen this man smile bigger than that annoying smirk." Kingo playfully leaned an arm on Druig's shoulder.

"I've also had the displeasure of seeing them kiss like 50 times during the time spand of getting here from the Amazon."

"You're just jealous." Makkari joked.

"What?! No! I get tons of babes! I just don't have the time for a committed relationship." Kingo stuck his nose in the air.

You tried not to smile while listening to your friends tease Druig. You continued pretending to pay attention to Phastos's rambling about a new invention idea.

Druig's eyes caught yours.

"Get me outta here!" He pleaded in your head.

"We just got here baby." Your voice is always so gentle and soothing in his brain. Even though he's begging to leave, he doesn't mind staying as long as you're here.

"Alright. You definitely owe me one, love." A smug look dawned his features as he affectively ignored the two Eternals babbling next to him.

You felt your ears and cheeks blush, going thankfully unnoticed by Phastos.

You are going to do absolutely anything to make sure that you both come out of all of this alive and well. There's no way you could possibly imagine a lifetime without Druig.

[samirant]

Dungeon Crawler Carl & You

*taps microphone*

Okay, so I've been going off about Dungeon Crawler Carl for months now and I do not see it stopping at any point, so let's see if I can entice one or two of you to join in my madness.

DCC is Lit RPG and written like a video game come to life, from the point of view of the contestants trapped within the game. There are levels to conquer and loot boxes and quests and an AI running things that has a very tenuous hold on stability to begin with and doesn't keep it for very long.

Carl is just... a guy. He's just a guy with a traumatic backstory that he's squished deep down inside himself because he doesn't like drama and he thinks he's doing just fine because it's done, you know? It's in the past, can't change it, can't hurt him anymore.

(It can hurt him. It does hurt him.)

The world as we know it is destroyed in a split second, Carl surviving by mere happenstance and the only reason he goes into the dungeon is that he will literally freeze to death otherwise. At no point is this guy searching for glory or thinking he's a savior, he's just trying to survive another day. That Carl happens to have his ex-girlfriend's prize-winning tortie Persian cat with him is a coincidence - and it turns out to be his major lifeline in the entire series. Princess Donut is his partner in crime, his bestie for life and if he ever loses her, he will lose everything. Goodbye to the last vestiges of his sanity.

The first couple levels are pretty contained, Carl & Donut learning the ropes and how to survive every encounter with increasingly powerful enemies who want nothing more than to see them dead, the eyes of the universe and the corporations running the shitshow ever focusing on them and trying to eke out as much profit as possible at the same time.

Then they meet other survivors - both good and misled - and the beauty of humanity comes out, the sacrifices they are willing to make for one another, the knowledge that they aren't likely to survive, but they make the right choices anyway because dying might be bad, but letting each other down is worse.

The secondary characters grow in complexity with every level. Where it was once just Carl & Donut, it becomes dozens of characters, from all over the world, all of them gifted in their own way, all of them fighting as best they can, some of them betrayed, some of them dying, some of them choosing to go out on their own terms. Men and women and animal alike, they are individual and committed to the greater good.

Matt Dinniman has written a series that takes an emotional toll on its readers: pain, loss, horror, humor, desperation, walking through life with an unrelenting grief. There are dick jokes and drug-dealing, lava-spitting llamas and riffs on Wonderwall and lines like: Trauma does that, I thought. It's an explosion with your heart at the center. It changes everything all at once.

Also, there are velociraptors.

And a decapitated, talking sex doll head that wants to kill everyone's mothers.

It's a LOT of stuff going on, all right?

And just as you think the story can't get any better, enter Jeff Hays. Our audiobook narrator, our man of a hundred distinct voices. Good god, he's phenomenal. I've listened to so many books and while there are some very talented narrators out there, Jeff Hays leaves them in the motherfucking dust. I honest to god thought he was using an app to manipulate his voice for different characters until I saw him narrating in real time and I was utterly blown away by his talent.

The combination of this story by Matt Dinniman and narration by Jeff Hays has me going back, time and time again. I recommend the experience wholeheartedly and hope you'll give it a chance.

[marie-m-art]

There's a specific concept from Good Omens that I really like (amongst many others), that I was chuffed to also find in a Sandman and a Discworld story!

I love that in Good Omens (both book and TV), Heaven and Hell are presented as mostly redundant and ineffectual when it comes to human morality - and that Hell in particular find some of the things humans do to be pretty shocking, and/or instructive.

Opportunities for humour aside, this idea flies in the face of the common belief that the world's worst ills are the result of outside forces influencing people to do evil (ie the devil. Or ... lizard people etc? I digress). And it's unlike other stories out there that are like, "World War II was actually caused by xyz characters!" or similar. Good Omens doesn't rewrite history like that, or let us - humanity - off the hook when it comes to the big stuff, when it could so easily have done so in a universe where Heaven and Hell are literally real.

The story, of course, also credits human cleverness to humans, and celebrates the things we should be proud of, like art, music, delicious food, craftmanship, invention, etc. And it credits humans for having a propensity for compassion and goodness.

"[Crowley] did his best to make their short lives miserable, because that was his job, but nothing he could think up was half as bad as the stuff they thought up themselves. […] And just when you'd think they were more malignant than ever Hell could be, they could occasionally show more grace than Heaven ever dreamed of. Often the same individual was involved."

I love this concept because I see it as an uncoupling of religion and morality. They can both exist together, but the former isn't necessary for the latter. (This isn't the only possible interpretation; the more literal reading might be more about free will, but this is where I extrapolated it to).

From Sandman: Season of Mists Episode 2 (plot context stripped out to avoid spoilers, but skip ahead to black text if you want absolutely nothing spoiled if you want to read it).

Lucifer: "And the mortals! I ask you - why? […] Why do they blame me for all their little failings? They use my name as if I spend my entire day sitting on their shoulders, forcing them to commit acts they would otherwise find repulsive. 'The devil made me do it.' I have never made one of them do anything. Never. They live their own tiny lives. I do not live their lives for them."

And from Eric, a Discworld book (this one's related to Hell learning from humans, more than morality/free will... I won't spoil the funny by elaborating!):

"Earl Beezlemoth rubbed one of his three noses.

'And humans somewhere thought this up all by themselves?' he said. 'We didn't give them any, you know, hints?' […]

The earl stared into infinity. 'I thought we were supposed to be the ghastly ones,' he said, his voice filled with awe."

Another commonality between these two stories that isn't directly shared by Good Omens (yet...? still have another season coming …) but that I like enough to point out, is the idea that Hell is a place where people end up if they believe they deserve to go there. I like this because a lot of people are influenced to feel guilty about "sins" that are innocuous parts of normal human behaviour, so it's pretty brutal to fear going to Hell over them. There's comfort in this idea, to me. (granted, the following Sandman quote states this less explicitly but I take the same meaning from it … but lmk if I've done a reading incomprehension; I also haven't read all the books yet).

From Sandman:

Lucifer: "And then [the mortals] die, and they come here (having transgressed against what they believed to be right), and expect us to fulfill their desire for pain and retribution. I don't make them come here."

From Eric (partial footnote near the beginning):

"Interestingly enough, the gods of the Disc have never bothered much about judging the souls of the dead, and so people only go to hell if that's where they believe, in their deepest heart, that they deserve to go."

Eric also really leans into the idea of Hell being a bureaucratic, corporate, boring nightmare, also familiar to Good Omens fans, and the demons are so over it. The tone (you could probably guess) is very different from Sandman, and it's one of the earlier, less-serious Discworld books; it's a very fun, absurd ride of a read!

There are a few other Discworld books I'll talk about in a future post, that may also be of interest to certain Good Omens fans (I'm gearing these posts toward the fans who came to Good Omens from the TV show and haven't had the pleasure of discovering Neil's and Terry's other work yet); the ones I have in mind examine religious extremism, and the uncoupling of religion and morality too. A couple of them also have queer themes, if that is also your jam! (Less shipping opportunities but I assume some fans, like me, like the rest of the material in GO in addition to the love story).

I'll end this with a quote from a footnote from Eric that has nothing to do with anything in this post, but which took me by surprise and had me laughing days later whenever it came to mind. It's referring to books in a section of the library:

"Just erotic. Nothing kinky. It's the difference between using a feather and using a chicken."

And another bonus one that I found while looking for the first:

"Rincewind had been told that death was just like going into another room. The difference is, when you shout, 'Where's my clean socks?', no one answers."

I hope this made sense and is maybe interesting to someone ... I had fun talking about this at least!

[s1ckh1mb0]

Lemme give you a megaphone so the ppl in the back can hear you bestie‼️🫶🏽

Like yes I wanna be longingly fucked sideways with fingers down my throat till I’m all teary eyed but….what if me and him just went to a museum and look at marble statues or paintings made by artists from long ago and point out the small details while sharing the historical context behind them. Or what if we held hands while going to a coffee shop owned by a small business then an old bookshop. We could read classic literature and write poems to each other or sum🤷🏾

I love this so much. Like the causal intimacy of being together with your girlfriend/boyfriend and being able to have interesting conversations and spending time with you is what makes doing things like this so great. Both of your phones away in your back pockets so that you both have one another’s attention. Time can go by so fast without the distractions of other people around trying to voice opinions. Learning together and growing together as you both grow older.

There are many different characters I can see this with. Especially when it comes to the women. Most time they are some of the most intellectual people and they just get thrown off. The AOT girls are the first ones that come to mind. Mikasa and Historia especially. Those two would absolutely love to do something casual with you. Historia is an absolute renaissance art lover. Michaelangelo is would be one of her favorite artists. She knows so many facts and can tell you for literal hours. Painting dates ejth Historia oh my lord. One of her favorite things to do. She’s so messy with it and it’s so cute.

Mikasa though? She’s all for cafe dates. She is obsessed with you. Now I think Mikasa and Historia had a bit more fancier taste because of who they are, but Mikasa loved being to be close to you and just hear you talk to her about just about anything. Her pretty nails that you did for her, twisting around your curls as she sat prettily on your lap while you fed the small cake that she bought for you guys.

Another girl I think this works for is Bulma from dragonball. Oh my god that woman is beautiful and smart. Museum dates are 100% guaranteed. She’s one of the smartest characters in that entire show and you think you’re getting out of hearing everything that woman knows? She is so graceful with it too. The two of you walking around hand in hand while she educates you on all the different facts is so amazing. She also loves how much you know on your niche and different interests. Especially if comes things about science or the body. She loves being able to talk to someone on her level or educate you.

When it comes to men the first thing to comes to men first people that come to mind are Nanami and Levi. We all know how Nanami is, he’s the hardworking man that we all love and there’s no way you guys don’t have a museum date at least once. But, I can see nanami doing bakery dates. Something small you both can fit in your busy schedules because nanami had made a vow to himself that you guys do at-least two times a month. He loves to use that time to discuss anything you think has been affecting you guys, whether to be in the relationship or just something bothering you at work or whatever. If there’s nothing bother you then you guys just talk about any events coming up or even planning the future you want to have for the both of you. It’s the ambiance of the bakery that makes you both feel so calm which is so different from the many things you have to do all day. He holds your hand as you speak, rubbing his thumb over your knuckle while watching your lips as he digest every word that comes from your lips.

Levi is totally the bookstore date kind of man. Sometimes you guys don’t really want or have anything to talk about. You just both miss each other so you sit together while reading. Both doing your own thing but being close enough to fill the need of being together. You both have your own books (headcanon that Levi prefers audio books instead cause of his lost of vision) and you rest your hand on his lap as you sit together on the small bench in for bookstore. He is retired so you two take a lot of time to yourselves, just enjoying the presence of one another..

Even people like Captain price and Laswell from call of duty, they love going out to drive in movies with you. You end up sitting on their lap while they laid in the back seat. Halfway through the movie those two aren’t even watchin anymore. Laswell would just be kissing the back of your neck while wrapping her arms around your waist, silently thinking about how lucky she is to have you in her life. While price is just happily watching all perched up in his lap, smoking his cigar, and thinking about how in love he is with you.

———————————————————————

Anyways I love all these ideas and a lot of people currently (especially men) don’t do dates and showing affection like people used to. I feel with how everything is on social media people just mostly look for someone sexually or they base a lot of opinions on the sexual aspect of the relationship. Like yeah that’s great and all but I want someone to YEARN for me. To want to be around me and miss me when I’m gone. Someone willing to remember small things because I feel like when someone knows you well knows what efforts to put in when it comes to loving you and showing you ways they do.

And I’m fortunately lucky enough to have a man like that❤️ @insane-juggalo

[revasserium]

pomefiore #1 - truth

vil.

the truth is — he doesn’t know what to make of you, and it isn’t like it’s the first time he’s felt stumped by something, though he’d rather give up his favorite tinted moisturizer than to admit it but… there’s something about you. you, in all your unassuming beauty — the kind that begs no attention but your own, and yet leaves no one unchanged in its wake. the first time he sees you, he is held still by the sight, the quiet weight of your presence, and the first time you smiled, he’d found himself breathless, held still by his hummingbird heartbeat, the stitch and stagger of his lungs as he fights for the air that he knows he needs and yet. “you’re staring,” you’d said to him once, long after he’d admitted to you how he felt, and not so long after you’d admitted to him that you’re not quite sure what this is but you’re willing to try. “i know,” he says, offering you nothing more than a painted porcelain smile, his eyes never leaving yours. “you can take a picture, it’ll last longer,” you tease, feeling a blush as it warms your cheeks, but vil only shakes his head, “a picture could never do you justice… what a preposterous thought.” and he says this was if it were an obvious thing, reaching out to brush a stray strand of hair from your cheek, “and why would i bother with a picture when i could spend my time admiring the real thing?”

rook.

the truth is — he’s been a gone man since the moment he saw you, and suddenly, everything he’s ever thought he knew of falling in love, of being swept off one’s feet, of happily-ever-afters, seems shallow in the face of this — whatever this is. because he’s certain that there isn’t a word big enough for it yet, this thing inside him whenever you deign to look his way, whenever you cast him a shy glance or a smile, whenever he hears the sound of your crystalline laughter, ringing through him like so many church bells, tolling the coming of something heavenly indeed. “the descent of an angel,” he proclaims, sweeping into a too-low bow the first time you ask him what he thinks of you being here, crash-landing the way you did into the entrance ceremony. you’d laughed again, then said, “c’mon, i’m being serious!” to which he’d pressed a hand to his chest, his eyes going wide as he insists, “i’m being nothing but! do you think i’d make jest of such a momentous occasion?” and when you’d pursed your lips, blushing hard, looking anywhere but at him, he’d reached out to tilt your chin back up took at him, only to say, “i mean… what else am i supposed to think? when someone like you falls from the sky? if that’s not a blessing, then truly, i don’t know what is.”

epel.

the truth is — he’s never felt more at home that he does with you, and not because you remind him of home, the soft, lilting accent of your voice so much more melodious than his own, but when you’d told him that you like his accent, he’d gone quiet for almost a full ten minutes, trying to think of something perfect to say. he comes up blank, but by then, you’d gone back to your book, humming as if you hadn’t just shattered his entire world with a single sentence and gone about your day. so he lets himself sink into the summer-like warmth of your presence, the sweet and tang of your teasing eyes, your daring laughter, the way your tongue darts out over your apple-red lips when you’re thinking too hard. and he wonders, god does he wonder — what those lips might taste like, what they might feel like. if they’re just as sweet as he thinks they are, or if they, like you, carry a sharpness inside like a hidden knife, if they might split him open if he were to one day press his own lips to yours, for just the quickest taste. maybe someday, he’ll try, but for today, he contents himself with watching your eyes flicker back and forth over the pages of the book, and he thinks maybe someday, but tomorrow is someday too, isn’t it?

[posallys]

all right here is my word vomit live watch

IMMEDIATELY i am slapped in the face by toby stephens as poseidon i am FERAL

THE LUKE AND PERCY PARALLEL “LOOK, YOU DIDN’T WANT TO BE A HALFBLOOD” OH MY FUCKING GOD

THE MISSING LUKE AND PERCY TRAINING SCENES OH DEAR LORD THANK YOU THANK YOU

“When am i ever going to use this” percy i LOVE YOU

“So you can use them against your opponent” OH BOY

Finally some action i love a good sword fight

But where's annabeths necklace imma kill people

Ooh some god strength okay okay tasty

HELL YEAH POSEIDON POWERS FUCK HIS SHIT UPPPPPP 

“I WARNED YOU. IF YOU'RE NOT CAREFUL, YOU'LL FIND OUT WHO I AM” OH I LOVE THE ENERGY YESSSS FUCK YEAH

GO OFFF PERCY 

“AND YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE JUST A KID”

Ares didn't curse him i hate it here

OH WHAT IS THAT VOICE

OH MY GOD THE CABIN SOMEBODY SEDATE ME

this can go one of two ways

“Violent seismic activity” MMM YUMMY

UH HULLO THIS IS NOT WHAT I EXPECTED ALECTO!???

I lied there was a secret 3rd way this could have gone and it happened 

OOP THERE’S THE NECKLACE

“Where's the glory in that” wow tell me you don't understand Percy's character without telling me you don't understand Percy's character 

“I don't have an appointment” THATS SO FUCKING ICONIC OF HIM

Wait i kind of fuck with this olympus i was picture all white and pristine but this FUCKS

“SHOULDN'T THEY BE JUST AS AFRAID OF US AS WE ARE OF THEM” OH MY FUCKING GOD. OH MY GOD. HOLY SHIT 

“you're learning fast” OH MY GODDDDDDDDD

“Things that are small and scary….” BROOOOOOOOOOOO

the show has rights for the luke and percy content and posally and percabeth and that's IT

LANCE REDDICK ❤️❤️❤️ greatest of all time rest in peace ❤️ (you'll always be Cedric daniels to me)

Ohhh king he does a bad ass zeus

Where's poseidon though DONT TAKE HIM FROM ME 😭😭😭

Lance ily

Lance reddick zeus you're perfect to ME

OHHHHH YES GOOD SHIT

percy jackson king of audacity 

AGHHHHHJJJDHH POSEIDON I LOVE YOU BRIAN BROMEN OH FUCK YES IM. SNKDKKWKWJFKMQ3LI4HRND IM VIBRATING NRJNW OHMYGID

IM THROWING UP OH MY GOD

“I SURRENDER” OH BROTHER DO I HAVE THOUGHTS THOUGHTS TOO MANY THOUGHTS FUCKKKKK

OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDDD IM GOING TO PUKE

TOBY STEPHENS LOVE OF MY LIFE

I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE UNWELL IN MY ENTIRE LIFE

SHUT UP NOBODY TOUCH ME

“OBEDIENCE DOESNT COME NATURALLY TO YOU DOES IT” ohhhhhhhh brother call me an ambulance 

“I must take some of the blame i suppose” so you CAN read the books you just chose not to for the other 7 episodes….

THE SEA DOES NOT LIKE TO BE RESTRAINED FUCK YEAHHHHHB BROTHER

HIM ONLY UNDERSTANDING THE WORD FATHER IM GOING TO KILL MYSELF IM SOBBING 

POSEIDON SMILE IM DYING 

I DIDN'T LEARN IT FROM CHIRON AND THEN POSEIDONS FACE OH FUCK IM PUKING SHAKING CRYING

IM SO SO SO UNWELL IM LITERALLY INCOHERENT 

“Ares is a moron, as you noticed” STOP I LOVE HIM THERES THAT ASSHAT POSEIDON ENERGY IM LOOKING FOR

“of course we dream, why do you ask” “DO YOU EVER DREAM ABOUT MOM” I AM DEAD I DIED I ASCENDED IM FLOATING LEVITATING FLYING OH DEAR LORD OH MY GOD IM SO SO SO ILL

TOBY STEPHENS THE MAN THAT YOU ARE POSEIDON THE MAN THAT YOU ARE OH MY GOD HIM GOLDING PERCYS HEA DIM VIMITING SHITING MYSELF KILLING DYING DEAD DJFICJJWOKDKDJN FUCK ME FUCK FICK

TOBY TOBY TOBY YOURE PERFECTVTHE PAIN THE FACIAL EXPTESSUINNS IM DYING DEAD

THE PEARL KILL KILL KJAJDJWKKDJJDJDUEJJ2NH3H

I AM HYPERVENTILATING 

Not to be greedy BUT WHERE IS THE QUEEN AMING WOMEN WHERE THE FUCK WAS IT YOU CANNOT GIVE ME ALL OF THAT AND THEN NOT GIVE ME THE MOST FUCKING ICONIC LINE OF ALL TIME WHAT THE ACTUAL ABSOLUTE FUCK I AM GOING THROUGH SO MANY EMOTIONS WHATBTHEFUCK

there's still 20 minutes left taylor breathe it can still happen 

PERCABETH HUG MY RELIGION

annabeth luke percy trio is SOOOOO interesting to me

I hate percy knowing :( ur a bit too perceptive buddy but it's okay 

“I DIDN'T THINK YOU'D GIVE THEM TO GROVER TO WEAR” SHOOT ME IT WOULD PROBABLY FEEL ABOUT THE SAME

THE GODS ARE MY ENEMY, YOU IM HERE TO RECRUIT OHHHHH BROTHER

OH HELLO BACKBITER LORE OKAY

LUKE I GET YOU I UNDERSTAND

I MET YOUR DAD *SLASH* OH THEY GOT HIM THEY GOT HIM GOOD

LUKE PERCY FIGHT MY EYES HAVE BEEN BLESSED IN THIS DAY

PERCY APOLOGIZING HONEY UR TOO SWEET

ANNABETH OH FUCK OH HELLO

So tell me what are the plans for ttc now lol

I HEARD EVERYTHING ANNABETH HONEY COME HERE I NEED TO HUG YOU

I must ask….where the FUCK was this energy the rest of the season this episode is literally so insane it almost makes up for the rest of everything

“How does she feel abt all of this” ooh yummy i like the foreshadowing 

“I imagine she's thrilled” WRONG thalia would stomp freddy chases head in if given the chance

LEAH UR BRAIDS ARE GORGEOUS

stop percy had HEART EYES 24/7 FOR HER IM GOING TO COMBUST

“JUST BE A KID” IM SOBBING

THE SEARCHERS LICENSE IM CRYING SOBBING UR PERFECT GROVER 

“I'LL FIND YOU” FORESHADDDDDDDOWWWINGGGGGGGG

“NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS WE MEET BACK HERE NEXT YEAR”, OH I LOVE THEM IM CRYING SOBBING OH MY BABIES

MONTAUK IM GOING TO KILL MYSELF FUCK DUDE U CANT DO THIS 

i want poseidon to be there i know he wont be but i NEED it

Stop honey percy ilyyyyy you're such a sweetheart im kissing ur forehead and tucking u in

OH HELLO “IT'S TIME TO WAKE UP” WOOOOAHHHHHHHH OKAY

“WE'RE STILL DOING THIS” LMFAOOOOO

“TURNS OUT IM PRETTY GOOD AT THIS….COME FIND ME” CRAZY 

……MOTHERFUCKER if they dont show gabe dying im gonna riot

WHERE WAS THE REST OF MY POSALLY 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 YOU CAN'T GIVE ME SOME AND THEN TAKE AWAY THE LITTLE FROM THE BOOKS

WHERE IS SALLY MURDERING GABE HELLO

AHHH END SCENE LOL AH THE BOX

THE IMPLICATION THAT IT WAS ALL POSEIDON……..WHAT IF I DIE OH MY GOD

[chaoticbardlady99]

Darling, Never Stop Haunting Me- MDNI 18+

Spawn! Astarion x F! Ghost Reader

Chapter 9: Performance Review

Synopsis: You and Astarion read your book and a moment of peace opens up the opportunity for risks. You ask Astarion to give you a lesson early in the morning after Karlach's morning wake up call wakes more than just Astarion's brain up.

CW: Oral (Female Receiving), Oral (Male Receiving), sex, praise kinks, virginity loss, Dom (Astarion)/ Sub (Birdie/You) ish

Disclaimer- put together the picture for the banner, but I do not own any of the pictures. I did take the picture of ‘Birdie’ and Astarion on my PS5

Likes, Comments, and Reblogs are always appreciated! Thank you for all your support and love!

Chapter 8: Chapter 10: AO3

  “He stuck his member into the man’s weeping hole-“

“Astarion,” you laugh, “stop, this is terrible- I don’t think it’s going to matter how many different voices you make or gestures- let alone languages- you read it in.” 

“I disagree, my Love,” he says as if it’s the most natural thing in the world, “I think I have made it far more entertaining this way.” 

“Ah yes because talking about a man’s ’weeping hole’ sounds so much better in a pirate voice or in Orcish.” 

 “Oh? Can you do better?”

 You clear your throat before belting out in a C Minor, “HE STUCK HISSSS MEMBER INTO HIS WEEEEPPINGGG HOLEEEEE!”

  You are both in stitches- this book is truly truly terrible, but it has erased any tension that had been lingering from earlier. 

  It’s probably pretty late now- surely it would be best to start going to sleep. You can’t get yourself to though, you want to spend as many waking minutes as you can with him. 

 You had really thought he was going to spend the night with someone else, but he’s here with you instead. He wanted to be here with you- he was rushing to get back here to be with you.

  Your laughter dies down and you are both left in a comfortable silence. You lean back into Astarion’s chest once again- relishing in the feeling of the contact. 

  Maybe you just… make your move? It could be possible that he has feelings for you, couldn’t it?

  You move slowly so that you straddle his lap and Astarion almost seems to help adjust you faster when he realizes what you are doing. He is looking up at you and your heart skips a beat. 

 Wanting. Need. Love.

 Affections that are relatively foreign to you, but you can identify in his eyes because you feel the same. 

 You cup his face with your hands, your eyes search his face for any sign to stop, but his hands are tight on your hips and his mouth is hovering over yours of his own volition. You timidly close the gap.

  It feels like fireworks, but not in the way one would expect. It feels like giddiness, happiness, whimsical, and excitement. His lips tease at yours and guide you as you learn how to kiss him. 

  It’s absolutely incredible- your hands gently grasp at his curls and he moans against your mouth. Astarion’s hands move to your ass and he maneuvers you so that you are even closer to him now. 

  You don’t know how you end up on your back, your hands pinned next to your head and your legs hooked around his hips, but it all feels positively divine. 

  All you can feel, breath, and acknowledge is him. Astarion is your entire world in this moment and you never want it to stop.

 So of course Gale and Tav are screaming upstairs. 

 Astarion lifts himself from you with a huff of frustration.

 “WHY ARE YOU GUYS SCREAMING!?”

  You feel bad for feeling so annoyed, but Gods dammit- of all the times, now!?

 “Uh hm, we- we,” they shout back, “WE ARE ARGUING ABOUT WHO IS GOING TO BE A BETTER DANCER DURING OUR FIRST DANCE!”

 “TAV,” you yell from inside the room, “GALE HAS TWO LEFT FEET!”

 “I DO NOT HAVE-,” Gale scoffs and throws his hands in the air, “you lot are insufferable!”

  As soon as the shouting stops, you pull Astarion back down on the bed and straddle him- he greedily brings your crotch down to his own. You gasp at the contact.

 More. You need more.

  He seems to have the same idea. 

  You both fumble through taking each other’s clothes off- your shirt getting stuck over your head because you both forgot to unlace the front. Astarion laughs as your shoulders slump and you look at him through the fabric, the neck stuck on your forehead, entirely unamused.

“This is your fault, ya know?”

 “Oh is it?” he says teasingly, “I’m not the one who chose the shirt.” 

“Well I wasn’t the one in charge of taking it-” you are stopped by the gasp that leaves your mouth when his mouth latches onto your exposed breast. 

  Astarion is relentless in his ministrations- he teases at your sensitive nipples. They almost feel sore in the aftermath, but it just makes you want him to continue. He releases your nub with a flick of his tongue before repeating his affections on the other. You fumble with strings on your shirt- finally taking it off- and the sight underneath you causes a wave of warmth to coat your legs.

  Astarion looks up at you with wide pupils and a hungry look in his eyes. He watches your every reaction and you try to hide behind your hair- only to have him quickly pull it away from your face.

 “Oh no, no, no,” he kisses in between your breasts, “don’t become shy on me now.”

  He brings you to a standing position, sinking to his knees as he kisses along your body and down your navel, and his hands gripping your ass. You feel worshiped, adored. 

  His mouth hovers over your already overly stimulated clit. He flicks his tongue across it and you gasp with pleasure.

“Do you want me to continue, lover,” he whispers, placing a kiss on your thigh that makes your body shiver in delight.

“Take me, Astarion,” you could cringe at how needy and cliche you sound, “I’m yours.”

  Astarion smiles widely, “Oh Darling, I am sure the Gods have sent you to ruin me.”

  His mouth is immediately sucking on your sensitive nub. Your hands grip his hair- eliciting a moan that vibrates to your core. You can feel yourself dripping between your thighs as he laps at you and teases you. 

  It all feels so right- his tongue against you, his hands holding you in place. You have certainly imagined moments like this, but nothing will ever compare to this- the real deal.

“Oh fuck- Star-“

  He hums against you before dipping his tongue inside your virgin cunt and you whine with delight at the contact. Your legs begin to shake and a knot of pleasure is forming in your belly. 

  Astarion uses his strength to keep you upright as your legs begin to give and his tongue seems to find the magic spot because you are fighting to not scream in pleasure. This is a private moment and if you can hear them, they can certainly hear you. 

  He removes his tongue from inside of you and you whine in protest- looking down at him with tears pricking your eyes. You need to cum- it’s physically painful how turned on you are right now, in the best way possible, but still.

  You had been so close.

  “I need you to be a good girl, Birdie,” he says, his eyes hooded and his smile mischievous- placing an open mouthed kiss to your clit, “I need you to cum for me and,” he grabs your hand away from your mouth, “I want the entire world to know you are mine. Cover your mouth again and I will stop- I am so much more motivated when you sing for me.” 

  Fuck. 

  You don’t have a moment to respond before he’s diving back in between your thighs, spreading your legs a bit so that his nose begins to tease your clit while his tongue drinks in every last bit of you. 

  You feel the knot uncoil in your stomach and you have to put your hands on Astarion’s shoulders for support. Your legs shake and your knees feel like jelly. You can’t believe you have been missing out on this for 354 years!

  He picks up your blissed out body and places you softly on the bed. Astarion grabs your left leg and begins to kiss up your body, starting at the ankle all the way down to your inner thigh. You feel so wonderful- you don’t ever want this to stop and a part of you is worried it’s a dream. 

  That thought is quickly thrown out the window when one of his fingers enters you and begins to slowly pump in and out. 

  Your back arches and your head goes back- a cry of pleasure leaves your lips. 

“So pretty “ he kisses the inside of your calf, “so good and all mine.” 

 You whine in agreement- your body finally adjusted to one finger so he adds a second. His mouth and other hand begin to knead and play with your breasts. Astarion suckles and nips your sore nipples- he adds a third finger and you immediately see stars. 

“A-astarion fuck…” 

 He removes his fingers from inside you- making eye contact as he cleans them off.  He kisses the rest of the way up your body and his mouth hovers over yours. You feel the head of his cock tease your entrance, it’s already easily dipping in between your folds. 

“Do you still want me to continue?”

 You nod earnestly, but you definitely feel some of the nervousness you had forgotten about begin to build up. Astarion seems to notice this and raises an eyebrow at you.

“You are thinking about something- what is it, Darling?”

 “What… what if I disappoint you?” you whisper, avoiding his eyes. 

  Astarion’s eyes soften significantly more, the flames of lust simmering and you fear you ruined the moment. He tilts your face back up so that you are looking him directly in the eyes.

 “You could never disappoint me,  Birdie,” he leaves a chaste kiss on your lips, “you are perfect in every single way and I truly am having the most wonderful time I have ever had sharing an intimate moment with someone.”

 You sigh in relief- that makes you feel a lot less nervous about the whole ordeal. 

“Let me know if I need to slow down or stop,” he whispers into your ear, “I fear, that if I have my way, you may not be entirely comfortable.”

  Warmth pierces your clit and the ball of nerves feels strained with want. You nod and Astarion kisses you again at the same time he slowly begins to push inside of you. You gasp- the uncomfortable pinching feeling making the corners of your eyes prick with tears. 

  You feel so full and his shaky breaths against your lips, the stiffness of his lower half as he tries to be gentle. One of your hands reaches between you so that you can rub your clit. 

  You can feel the static energy waiting to be released within him- he has wanted this for a lot longer than you thought. A part of you was worried he had just begun to feel this way and you were moving it along too fast. 

“You feel so good,” he kisses along your cheek, a moan leaving his beautiful lips as he moves in and out slowly, “it feels like you were made for me- made to take me.” 

  His words are genuine- you can hear it in his tone and the way he peers into your eyes now. 

 No performing, just Astarion.

 “I feel like I was made for you too,” you whisper before kissing him again, he groans against your mouth.

 Astarion rocks his hips, taking his time to stretch you around his cock. The pinching feeling is beginning to go away and unleash sensations of pleasure that you never thought you would get to experience in any lifetime. 

  He whimpers into your neck, his hips stuttering as he tries to hold back, but now that you feel good you need more.

“M-more- please.” 

  Astarion chuckles while releasing a sigh of relief, “well, since you asked so nicely, my love.”

  His hips snap, all the power he holds back being put into several deep thrusts that leave your toes tingling and reduces you to nothing but a puddle of whimpering gasps and moans. Your arms are loose around his neck and he kisses you along your chin, leaving love bites as he makes his way to your collarbones.

 The sound of your skin slapping together as he hits that perfect spot every single time is damning- his mouth is covering yours for the sake of some privacy (he doesn’t want you to feel embarrassed) but occasionally frees you so that he can hear you cry out as he thrusts back into you. 

  He adjusts so that one of your legs is up, ankle on his shoulder, and the other leg around his hip. You feel yourself blush as he makes eye contact with you through every movement of his hips, biting his lip and panting- his hair a wild mess for the first time ever.

 “You are far too good for me,” you whine, “Gods, you are perfect.”

  His pace falters- his body losing it’s rhythm for a moment and his head drops into the crook of your neck.

“You are amazing,” you say through gasps, “fuck-“

Astarion moves himself slowly within you and reaches down to play with your clit- pushing your hand away. Your back arches towards him- your body pleading for more as his pace picks up and his fingers continue to pay attention to your overstimulated clit. You are panting with want and he puts you on your knees. 

  The new angle and position as well as Astarion playing with your clit brings you closer to your orgasm than you had wanted to. You want to keep going- he feels so fucking incredible.

 His. His. His. I am his and he is mine.

  A blindingly wonderful sensation courses through your body as the knot unravels in your stomach again and your orgasm ripples through your body. You cry out his name, begging him to keep going. 

“Good… girl,” he kisses your calf, his hips erratic now as he chases his own high.

  The overstimulation and the general euphoria of being with him in this way makes your head spin in circles with happiness. Your lips are slightly parted and he coaxes pathetic whimpers from you. 

“A-as-Astarion,” you say through a shaky breath, “I need you to cum inside me pl- EASE! FUCK! 

 That seemed to have unleashed something within him because he is quickly pistoning in and out of you- your moans turning into borderline screams of pleasure, taking a guttural pitch. You can feel the thick ropes of his being coat your walls, leaving a mess in it’s wake. Astarion collapses on top of you and he softens inside you. He nuzzles his face into your neck and hums with pleasure.

  You breathe heavily as you try to regain your bearings. That was like nothing you have ever experienced before. He pulls you into him- his hands tracing shapes on your hips.

 “That, my Sweet,,” he says between kisses on your shoulder, “was incredible.” 

 “Extremely,” you let out a breathy laugh of relief, “that stupid book doesn’t do the act nearly enough justice.” 

 “Maybe we should continue reading,” he whispers into your ear, “compare notes?” 

  You laugh and kiss the top of his head.

“I think we may just have to.” 

****************************************************************

 The morning sun and the sound of ruckus downstairs stirs you from your sleep- Astarion is still passed out with his face buried in your hair and his breath fanning your skin. He obviously hasn’t heard of his other companions' arrival. 

  Memories of last night come flooding back to you and you smile like an idiot- enjoying every second of your memories of the events. 

  It had been a beautiful dance- after so long of just wanting him and somehow, he wants you too.

 “KNOCK KNOCK FANGS, TUNES! GET YOUR ASSES OUT HERE! IF I’M NOT GETTING EARLY MORNING SEX YET, THEN NO ONE IS!!”

“IF ONLY THEY WOULD HAVE NORMAL SEX TO BEGIN WITH!” Tav yells after her.

 So everyone began drinking pretty early then and no one heard a thing. Awesome!

  Astarion, obviously awake now, groans in irritation and presses his face into your shoulder. 

“If we ignore her… she’ll go away.”

 “I hope so,” you return with an equally sleepy voice, “I have no intentions of leaving this bed if I don’t have to.”

  He chuckles and Astarion absentmindedly places a kiss on your shoulder. A  needy, horribly wanting sigh escapes your lips. You would feel embarrassed, but it seems that he very much enjoyed the sound because you can feel his hard cock against your ass.

“SHIT!” 

  Astarion pulls away and looks absolutely panicked- pulling a pillow over his crotch area. 

  “Fuck- Gods- I am so sorry,” he is practically hysterical, “I-“

  Your body moves for you and you press your lips against his- it’s a brief peck and he is absolutely bewildered by your actions. You feel the tears of rejection coming on the longer he doesn’t do or say anything and you hold them back like your life depends on it.

  At least it you were given the opportunity to experience your dreams once, right?

 “I- sorry- I thought after last night,” you chuckle awkwardly, tears falling from your eyes in spite of your willing to make them stop, “I will, um, give you some privacy.” 

  You don’t even have a moment to move before his lips are following yours and his thumbs are wiping away your tears- using his body to pin you to the mattress, flinging the pillow aside, and he grinds against your clit. 

 Gods, this is divine. 

“That wasn’t just a dream?” He whispers against your lips.

“No,” you whisper back, “do you regret it?”

“Not at all,” he says promptly, “do you?”

“Not at all,” you smile back- his own smile becoming even more blinding. 

 His lips refuse to leave yours for even a second after that. He is soft with his touch, but desperate and needy all at the same time. It’s not difficult for you to keep pace with him- your body seems to be programmed to his within seconds. Only one time and you are entirely his. You are ruined for everyone else- you just know it. 

 However, you want to make him feel good and just focus on him this morning. You have heard him using the bathroom once or twice to… fulfill his needs, but you never could have dreamed he would be imagining you.

  “Wait,” you put your hand between your lips and feel him frown, “I want to pleasure you.” 

 “Is that so?” He whispers, he looks surprised if you are being completely honest.

“Teach me how to take care of you,” you cup his face with your hands, leaving a chaste kiss, “show me.” 

   Astarion pushes himself off of you, pulling you upright along with him- he looks at you with curiosity.

“Are you sure, my Love?” He says wearily, “I don’t want you to feel like you have to.”

“I don’t,” you insist, “but if you don’t want me t-“

“That- my Dear- is far from the issue,” he steps forward, leaning forward to whisper in your ear, “get on your knees.” 

  You do as you are told, a jolt of arousal going straight to your core, and you hook your hands into the seam of his underwear, pulling them down and his cock springs free. All of this, just for you, because of you. 

  His tip is already weeping with precum and he looks embarrassed. Why? You think he looks beautiful this way. He always looks beautiful.

 “You’re beautiful, Star,” you kiss along his navel, “I am so excited to finally know what you taste like.”

  His eyes alight again at the praise and the implied desire in your words. 

 “Cheeky pup.”

 Astarion wraps his hand around his cock and you look up at him with anticipation- he puts the tip to your lips and salty precum begins to dribble down your chin. You lap it up needily and that seems to push the embarrassment away. With hands tangled into your hair, he opens your mouth so you can take him. 

  Take him you do- his head hitting the back of your throat, you gag at the sudden presence, slightly embarrassed. Astarion chuckles.

“Nothing to be embarrassed about, Love,” he says darkly, “you are already being so good for me.” 

  You didn’t think you would have a praise kink, but you suppose it makes sense with the nature of your vocation anyhow. You live for praise and compliments so it makes sense. 

  Your mouth follows his hand as he strokes himself, his other hand gripping your hair, and keeping eye contact with you as he slowly fucks into your mouth. You are surprised by how much you are enjoying this, but it’s only because he obviously is.

  Astarion is a moaning mess above you and around you, sweat starting to dampen his neck, and his hand guiding you to go faster. You apply pressure with your tongue and drag it along the sensitive skin- he shudders with pleasure.

“D-do that again and I… I want you to touch yourself.” 

 The last part comes out as a whisper and again, you are surprised to see him nervous and embarrassed about the things he is saying. It’s like you are both blushing virgins.

  You happily comply, circling your tongue around his head and applying pressure on his slit. Astarion’s hand tightens in your hair as he begs you to keep doing that. You play and tease your own clit- humming with pleasure around his length. You can feel yourself blushing more and more as he praises you and guides you through touching yourself- eventually having you finger yourself at a painstakingly slow pace. 

“Do- don’t change your pace until- fuck- until I tell you to.”

  You hum and nod your head in understanding- bobbing him in your mouth. Astarion thrusts and hits the back of your throat- you gag a bit, but readjust much quicker this time. 

  Thank the Gods you have read so much pornography it could make an entire brothel blush. Being a 354 year old virgin really left a lot of free time and Donella had a very trashy library that was never redone.

  The early morning sun is illuminating the entire room- his eyes are bright and practically sparkling, his pupils blown wide with lust, and you can see the little bit of blood coming from his bottom lip. He must have bit it- the crimson liquid mixing with the thin sheen of sweat that covers his face. 

 Your ministrations coax praise from him and even the occasional begging when you stop moving to tease him. This is far too fun, for once, you are the one in control. 

  “Fuck- I’m,” he is cut off by his own moan, his seed spilling into your mouth and down the back of your throat. You can’t help the smile that graces your lips as he watches you swallow with wide, affectionate eyes. 

  You release him with a pop, swallow, and stand up- throwing your arms around his neck.

“How did I do?”

  Astarion throws his head back in laughter and you furrow your brows- leering at him.

“What!?”

 “That was the single best oral sex I have ever received and you are asking for a performance review?” he scoffs playfully, pressing a kiss to your forehead, “you were perfect, as you are in all things.” 

  You beam- deciding to ignore his teasing. 

“Would you like to join me in the bath?” He asks, “I doubt our companions are going to leave us alone for much longer if we don’t make an appearance.”

 Instead of answering, you take his hand and drag him to the bathroom.

**********************************************************************

Author note: Likes, Comments, and Reblogs are always appreciated! Please let me know if you would like to be on the tag list! I am using the Ghostwalk campaign for NPCs, locations, etc. It is a 3e Campaign and doesn’t mirror 5e Ghosts. I have tweaked some of the ghost powers and such for the sake of the story, but if you would like more information on Ghostwalk and the City of Manifest, there is a PDF online that is free to download :)

Tag List: @n3rdybirdee @fandomarchiveilyd @dajeong @hotmesshobbit @godoffuckedupcats @bitchstarion @hereliesblackdragon @pebble-bb @preciouslittlebhaalbae @lavvyan @beepersteeper @misscrissfemmefatale

[zabala0z]

Eughhhiffugi my legs hurt. Walked around college with my mom today because she got accepted so woooo!! Anyways, welcome back to me saying “huh???” To TMA S2. I’m your host, you know me, I’ve been posting for the past month 🫶🫶

MAG 67: Burning Desire

Oh my god Agnes. This further proves my theory that she’s probably not evil???? Like I think she does sone bad stuff like kissing the guy and permanently scarring his face for life but like…she kinda cried?? Also that woman told her something about being “released” so I think it’s like some kind of curse? But Agnes shook her head so I don’t know. Maybe it was about being like spiritually bound to that tree or something

MAG 68: The Tale of a Field Hospital

Unironically, this is my favorite minor character in The Magnus Archives. Joseph Russo is such a fanboy and I love it. He was all “and I know Illuminati exists but you don’t have to tell me 😏” like god I’m howling. So sad he’s dead.

The whole…death and disease has been pretty prominent in this season as well. Mostly spiders as we’ll see but there’s like a shit ton of illness themes. Also Amherst appearance. Whether it’s the same or a different person, Amherst seems to have disease and gross shit follow him around. Like the ants in an earlier episode and that old persons home in Taken Ill. Gross. Ew. Gross.

ALSO “she seemed far too tall” yeah no shit. I’m literally screaming at my phone please I’m begging you Jon to figure it out

For MAG 69: Great more spiders. My only connection to anything is just the fact there are spiders and that’s been appearing a lot. Also poor Martin, trying to keep everything together 💀

Not much to say in “Book of the dead” but I liked it a lot. Another book. Surprisingly not Jurgen Leitners. Did not think that was possible.

For MAG 71, I don’t have many connections, again, but it was weird that Karolina was so…calm, giving her testimony?? Like usually when people give their statements in the moment, they sound pretty panicked, especially during the more scarier parts but she was flat throughout the whole thing. I’m guessing she’s keeping something hidden from the story and something happened to her. Maybe she got “replaced” y’know like with Sasha. Or maybe she’s entirely made of dirt. I mean she was pretty dry

Sorry.

Anyways, someone is living down in the tunnels. I would say it’s Gertrude because maybe she faked her death to hide from people but they did find her body. Well Martin did and then the police. But who knows.

Okay that’s everything. Not many revelations but I noticed I’m getting close to the end of season 2! Very exciting. I hope Michael pops up again. Just so I can hear it’s creepy ass voice

[skaldish]

Could you expand upon your ideas around how Venerating a Deity doesn’t mean trying to embody what they represent? I was raised in a church that literally said the word “worship” meant “to try to become like”. So I’m fascinated by how you could worship a deity of a thing and not want to make more of that thing out in the world. I want to learn a new paradigm

Happy to! I love talking about paradigms.

Firstly…

Different religions and denominations conceptualize "worship" differently.

This includes "what you do to worship" but also includes ideas around "what gives worship its value."

"Trying to become like a deity" is something I've seen specifically associated with Evangelism and Fundamentalism (perhaps others, but this is what I know). It's derived from the idea that Christians are warriors of god and that it's their duty to act as his voice and hands on Earth. This is derivative of their doctrinal idea that they need to "save" people by any means necessary. (Teaching people to define who they are through God makes people dependent on God for a core sense of self, which is a huge reason why it's so psychologically awful to leave these denominations. It robs you of everything you are and leaves you with no way of creating yourself anew.

It's one thing to admire a deity and aspire to adopt some of their attributes as a point of personal growth; it's another altogether to teach people that they need to replace their inherent personality with a prescribed ideological construct. I loathe it entirely.)

Now, Catholics don't tend to interpret worship as the act of "trying to be like God." Given what I've observed and what I know of their ideology, worship for them is largely a function of sacrifice. You sacrifice your time, skills, wealth, etc. to God, because giving up things that are difficult to give up is how you show you really mean your devotion.

(I've seen this behavior in Heathens, actually, when they do things like buy top-shelf mead only to pour every last drop of it out on the ground for Odin or similar.)

I also take a lot of issues with this form of worship because I know why it exists: Extortion. The Church learned hundreds of years ago that guilt-tripping people out of their money (in exchange for salvation, an unfalsifiable concept that they neither had to prove nor procure) was an excellent way to get rich and powerful with impunity.

Clearly you caught me on a day I'm feeling extra-spicy towards Christianity. But I bring those two up in detail because I know a lot of my followers come from these backgrounds, and having more points of differentiation is important.

See, the real pitfall here lies in thinking that Christianity represents the "default" for how religions work, when in reality it's the grand exception, given all of human history.

The other religions I know about (with the exception of Judaism) are distinctly polytheistic: Shinto, Hinduism, Buddhism, and various flavors of Paganism. These all have different models of worship because they all have different, culturally-informed philosophies about how divinity works. Religions are inseparable from the cultures that create them for this reason, and why switching religions is a function of adopting a completely new mindset, not just a new set of gods to venerate.

Norse Heathen Worship

Since this is a Heathen blog I'm obligated to talk a bit about this.

How we worship as Norse Heathens is still a matter of debate, but that's because we're still figuring out how to define "worship" within the context of how it operates as a spirituality.

At no point did Norse Heathenry have a governing body, a religious figure, or a holy book to guide practice. Things developed organically, unique to their time-period and location, and stories were (and are) passed down via oral tradition rather than written down.

Many Heathens mistakenly think we're missing religious mandates, hence why they're so bent on trying to find them or devise them. I think this is a mistake.

A religion's architecture derives from the values, worldviews, and agendas of the culture/people behind it. The reason why a Christian's relationship with God looks like a Lord/servant dynamic is because the religion was shaped by lawmakers, and "loyalty towards the law" was a value they wanted to instill in the general population. Christianity was used to shape politics, so politics in turn shaped Christianity.

Norse Heathenry didn't have this function, so rather than reflecting political values, it reflects cultural ones. The stories are allegorical representations of cultural ideas, which themselves are based in the context of animism—the idea that everything operates as an ecosystem, and divinity is inseparable from that ecosystem.

This is all to say that the way Heathens worship is largely a byproduct of how they interface with that ecosystem. How this looks is something we choose based on what we find connection with, as opposed to mandates given to us.

Some people might find this kind of answer unsatisfying because it doesn't lead to any directive on "how to worship," but that might be because we're used to thinking of worship as a "duty," as opposed to what is actually, anthropologically is: A type of enrichment.

How I Worship

The way I go about worship is the same way I go about any kind of social bonding; through collaboration. In my mind, venerating deities is functionally identical to socializing with them, and like any socialization, how that's done varies from deity to deity. Anything I do in my practice—offerings, devotional art, etc—is informed by what I perceive them liking.

(Keep in mind I'm a hard polytheist, and I'm a hard polytheist because it's the only descriptor that could describe how I experience deities; as beings with autonomy divorced from my own will. A soft polytheist would conceptualize this entire thing differently.)

I also personally conceptualize "veneration" "devotion" and "worship" all differently, which is why you'll see me use the word "veneration" to describe what most people call "worship:"

Veneration is the general state of reverence or respect for something we hold spiritually important, such as a spirit, deity, or ancestor.

Devotion is a kind of enthusiastic dedication that emerges from love.

Worship is a ritual activity done as a gift for a god.

But this is just how I understand things for myself. They're not a reflection of how these things are thought of in Norse Heathenry. (In fact, they're mostly a product of the fact I initially learned about worship through observation, rather than experience. But I figured I'd bring it up anyway to provide an additional dimension to your paradigm explorations.)

I'm not sure what else to say so, uh…feel free to follow up with questions in case you want me to dive more into something.

[felassan]

Article: 'If Anthem is the "anti-BioWare game", then James Ohlen is correcting the balance'

Text [quote]:

"The hugely influential design director talks Baldur’s Gate, his next RPG, and the abandonment of the BioWare model.

“Baldur’s Gate II set the model, and I obviously loved that model,” says James Ohlen. “But there were a ton of people at BioWare who didn’t like it.” During leadership meetings over the course of the Canadian designer’s 22 years at the RPG studio, he’d sometimes feel totally outnumbered when talking about the importance of story. “Game developers don’t get into the industry to create stories, they get into the industry to create games,” he says. “And so there’s this conflict between game developers and story - my entire career it's been a constant fight.”

Ohlen picked his side early. He was telling BioWare stories even before he joined the company. The meeting of Minsc and Boo, one of the most enduring partnerships in PC gaming, came about in a tabletop Dungeons & Dragons game he ran as a teenager. Then a comic book store manager, he took advantage of his premises to guide no fewer than three concurrent D&D groups through their campaigns. “I didn’t really have much of a life outside of Dungeons & Dragons,” he says.

BioWare programmer Cam Tofer played Minsc in one of those campaigns, “as a guy who’s basically been knocked on the head too many times in fights”. A merchant NPC of Ohlen’s invention sold him Boo, the miniature giant space hamster, in an apparent scam. Tofer ran with it, declaring that Boo would be Minsc’s animal companion, and holding one-sided conversations with the confidant that lived in his pocket. “In my campaign he was just a hamster,” Ohlen says. “I always thought of him as just a hamster.”

Back then, in the early 90s, there were no game design degrees, but Ohlen had dedicated himself to the next best thing. DMing proved to be an intensive training course in giving players agency and immersing them in another world - and his local reputation as a story wrangler landed him a job working on Baldur’s Gate. It’s a similar origin story to that of David Gaider, another D&D head who was plucked from the hotel industry to tell tales about vampires and druid groves.

“Have you ever read Malcolm Gladwell on the 10,000 hour rule? I think by the time I got hired by BioWare, I had done 20,000 hours of dungeon mastering,” Ohlen says. “It was ridiculous. I owe a lot to D&D. My friendships, my career, my mental stability.”

BioWare co-founder Ray Muzyka encouraged Ohlen to dig into the huge binders that contained the details of all the player characters and NPCs in his campaigns, and to let them spill out into the world of Baldur’s Gate. “I hadn’t intended to do that,” Ohlen says. “It seemed narcissistic. But he was right. Once I started using them, I started getting things done real fast. All the characters had personalities that I already knew.”

Those tabletop campaigns turned out to be accidental writers’ rooms - producing distinct personalities that reflected the voices of their individual players. From the binders came some of Baldur’s Gate’s most beloved companions, like Minsc and the egotistical conjurer Edwin, as well as its villains - leading all the way up to the sequel’s Hannibal Lector-esque antagonist, Jon Irenicus.

That said, inspiration for Baldur’s Gate II’s much deeper companion stories came from an unlikely source. During a freezing winter smoke break in Edmonton, an Interplay producer named Dermot Clarke mentioned that Baldur’s Gate’s characters weren’t nearly as developed as those in Final Fantasy VII.

“I’m very competitive,” Ohlen says. “I went and played Final Fantasy VII and was like, ‘Oh my good god, these characters make ours look like a bunch of cardboard cutouts. This is terrible.’” The disparity convinced BioWare to up their game, leading to the complex journeys of companions like Jaheira - the grieving wife and activist, whose sense of duty has been shaken by so much loss. Despite Ohlen’s distaste for the way SquareSoft’s RPGs played, he continued to be influenced by their character work - all the way up to Knights Of The Old Republic, which was partly inspired by the twist-laden Chrono Cross. That and Star Wars, of course.

“I actually totally, entirely ripped off The Empire Strikes Back in such blatant fashion,” Ohlen says. “You basically go to face the dark lord by yourself, and then you get into a lightsaber fight with him, and he kicks your ass. And then, after kicking your ass, he does the big twist. Then you don’t die because you’re rescued by your friends on the Millennium Falcon - I mean, the Ebon Hawk. It’s beat by beat the same thing.”

Of course, KOTOR’s plot twist didn’t feel familiar to players because it impacted not Luke Skywalker but them personally. For those who don’t know - and spoiler warning, if so - it revealed that your character was in fact a former Sith Lord, their memory wiped by the Jedi Council. In an RPG genre rooted by knowing your avatar down to their last stat, having your identity ripped out from under you felt genuinely radical. BioWare had succeeded in making its biggest setpiece not a battle, but a revelation. And in the process, it proved that BioWare storytelling was packed with the kind of explosive potential a publisher could bank on.

After the sale of the company to EA in 2007, Ohlen was put in charge of creative development on a Star Wars MMO, The Old Republic. It was BioWare’s next great hope, and an enormous undertaking - involving the founding of a brand new studio in Austin, Texas. At launch, it featured eight story campaigns which unfolded across 19 planets. In 2011, executive producer Rich Vogel told Fast Company that The Old Republic hosted “the most content in a video game ever”. Looking back, Ohlen views that as a fundamental problem.

“If open-world is the enemy of storytelling, multiplayer is the arch-villain,” Ohlen says. “If I was to go back in time to give my 2006 self some advice it would be, ‘Don’t try to make the game so long that you can fill up 200 hours. Instead, keep it shorter.’” With less ground to cover, the Austin team could have committed more resources to its Flashpoints - story-heavy missions which forefronted the difficult decision-making and tight encounter design that had elevated previous BioWare games. “Everyone wanted Knights of the Old Republic Online, and it felt more like World Of Warcraft with Star Wars spray-painted on it and some BioWare juice thrown in,” Ohlen says. “Even though the Metacritic was pretty good, it wasn’t new enough to really take off.”

At this point, a Knights Of The Old Republic 3 directed by Ohlen would be “not great”, he says. “Because I’m all Star Wars’d out. I have nothing else to say about Star Wars. But if a whole new studio does KOTOR 3 that loved KOTOR, that could be an amazing game. So hopefully Disney makes that happen. But probably not, because executives around there are all probably going, ‘It’s too hardcore.’” Ohlen still remembers the efforts he made to convince EA boss John Riccitiello that fantasy was a genre that could sell. “I had this whole PowerPoint presentation,” he says. “We have Lord Of The Rings! We have World Of Warcraft! We have Diablo!”

The year after The Old Republic’s launch, with the arch-villain of multiplayer still undefeated, development of Anthem began - and BioWare fought that increasingly costly battle for the better part of a decade. Those at the studio tired of the Baldur’s Gate model had the backing of EA, since a live service looter-shooter in the mode of Destiny could unlock years of long-term revenue beyond the reach of a single-player RPG. Or so the theory went. “It was always chasing the gigantic successes instead of leaning into what BioWare was good at,” Ohlen says. “It wasn’t just EA leaning on BioWare - there were lots of people in BioWare who wanted to do something different.”

Ohlen understood why others at the company would want to get away from a formula that empowered old hands like him and Gaider, and embrace one that empowered them instead. And he knew first-hand that freedom to experiment was what had set BioWare on the path to success decades before. Yet this new direction felt like an abandonment of the studio’s strengths. “Anthem was the ultimate expression of that,” Ohlen says. “It got away from everything. It’s kind of like the anti-BioWare game.”

Ohlen left in 2018, intending to retire from videogames altogether. “The big games have a formula and they don’t adjust it too much,” he says. “It’s very production driven, and I was like, ‘I’m not gonna get to make a game that I want to make at EA.’” He returned to the tabletop, putting together a new Baldur’s Gate adventure book featuring Minsc and the gang. But then Wizards Of The Coast called and flew him up to Seattle to discuss starting a new studio. Ohlen didn’t need or necessarily want a videogame development team under his wing - and that proved to be a perfect negotiating position.

“My demands were, ‘I only do this if I get to start my own studio in Austin, I get to choose who I hire, I get to choose exactly the kind of IP I want to make, no one’s gonna tell me anything about how to make the game.” At this point, Ohlen adopts a megalomaniacal tone, as if he were Baldur’s Gate baddy Sarevok, ascending to the throne of the dead god Bhaal. “I want control over absolutely everything! I want all the power!”

To his surprise, Wizards said yes, and Ohlen has been happily presiding over Archetype Entertainment ever since, building a new sci-fi RPG world without interference. “If you’ve seen the games I like to build, it’s that style of game,” he says. “But then it leans into the people and technology that I have available.” Ohlen won’t elaborate on what’s in his toybox, for fear of spilling secrets - but it’s worth noting that Mass Effect legend Drew Karpyshyn joined Archetype in 2020 as lead writer. “The feel in the studio reminds me of my early days at BioWare,” wrote Karpyshyn on his blog at the time. “I can feel the magic in the air.”

Magic and Wizards and science fiction - it’s the kind of atmosphere in which you could believe a hamster isn’t just a hamster, but something altogether sillier and more exciting. An act of collective imagination is happening, the binders are filled to bursting, and all we have to do is wait."

[source]

[underforeversgrace]

don't sass a sleep deprived ghost

DannyMay 2023 Day 17: Temper

title: don't sass a sleep deprived ghost

words: 1432

Complete

Excerpt: He was tired, he was over this, and he was so fucking done.

~~~~~~

“Dude, when was the last time you slept?” Tucker asked, eyeing the bags on Danny’s face.

Danny groaned and leaned his head against the locker, not even grabbing the books he needed for their morning classes. “Technically? About an hour ago. When was the last time I slept longer than thirty minutes, though? Like ten days ago.”

“Isn’t that when Ember knocked you unconscious?” Sam asked, frowning.

“Yes, how do you think I managed to sleep longer than half an hour?” Danny shot back with a weak grin.

“I don’t think being hit over the head so hard that you lost consciousness counts, bro.” Tucker said.

“Then we’re looking at over a month.”

“Danny!” Both friends exclaimed at the same time.

“I know, I know,” Danny said, waving his hand at them dismissively. “I don’t exactly control how many ghosts show up to beat my ass like a piñata, y’know? And my parents haven’t fixed the lock on the portal. So it’s just open.”

Sam sighed. “I’m worried, Danny. Half ghost or not, you need to sleep. If you were human, you’d probably be half dead by now.”

Danny frowned. “Yeah. If I was human. Good thing I’m dead then.”

Sam flinched. She hadn’t thought that sentence through and Danny - even a year since his accident - did not like being explicitly reminded his humanity was questionable at best. “Danny…”

“Drop it, Sam.” Danny said, irritation creeping into his voice in a way that made her spine tingle. Sometimes she had to stop and remember that Danny - goofy, silly, space obsessed Danny - was legitimately one of the most powerful beings she’d ever encountered. Only some god-like entities were stronger than him.

“Sorry,” she mumbled. He’d just cracked a joke, how had his mood turned so dark so fast?

“It’s fine. Maybe I can nab a nap during science class. I’m failing it anyway.” He grumbled, rubbing his eyes, the irritation already gone from his voice and replaced with exhaustion. She’d never seen him this tired. Should they be worried? A super powered, sleep deprived teenager with already questionable impulse control?

Sam fiddled with the wrist ray she always wore now. Hopefully there were no ghost attacks today. She didn’t want to have to fight something while Danny snoozed.

~~~~~~

Danny felt relieved. They had managed to get through all four morning classes without a single hint of a ghost. And! Because his teachers had all entirely given up on him and didn’t give a flying fuck about him, they let him sleep!

Yeah… he was definitely fine with the way his teachers had given up on him. This was fine.

Regardless, he had managed nearly three hours of sleep between all the classes and his ghost sense had not gone off even once.

Still, as he stumbled to his locker on his way to lunch, he could still feel the weariness all the way to his core. Sam and Tucker walked beside him, not so subtly glancing at him frequently. As much as he appreciated them being concerned for him - and he really did! - he didn’t enjoy the feeling of being watched, especially as on edge as he was. He’d been in at least six fights a day for the past month, ever since the lock on the portal broke.

“Fenturd!” A familiar voice called and Danny groaned. He did not have the energy for this shit today.

“Can we not today?” Danny said, turning around to face the bully.

“I got an F on my math test!” Dash shouted, picking Danny up by his shirt collar and shoving him against the locker. Dash was so mad he was red in the face and a vein was visibly bulging in his neck.

Great. Oh, look, they even had an audience, a semi circle of other students watching on in fascination.

“So did I. The hell do you want?” Danny responded as he forced his body limp, forced his body to not react to the assault.

“To make myself feel better.” Dash sneered, clenching his free hand into a fist and slamming it into Danny’s nose.

Danny yelped in pain, pressing his hand to his now profusely bleeding - and probably broken - nose. Apparently feeling Danny sufficiently wailed on, Dash released the smaller boy, who fell to his knees, still clutching his face.

Seriously? Danny has to get wailed on by ghosts and the dumbest fucking human he’d ever had the displeasure of meeting? “Fucking asshole,” he grumbled, though apparently he did so too loudly, Dash not yet out of earshot.

Dash turned instantly, an angry scowl on his face. “What was that, Fentwerp?”

“Nothing, Dash.” Danny said, pushing himself back to his feet, accepting the tissue Sam handed to him as she glanced at Dash in concern.

“No, no, please repeat yourself,” Dash said, getting back into Danny’s personal space.

“Check your ears, Dash. I didn’t say anything,” Danny insisted.

Dash practically growled in anger as he went to slam another fist into Danny’s face.

This time, however, Danny’s exhaustion caught up with him, and where normal people probably moved slower when tired, Danny routinely fought for his life and his instincts were far and beyond that. Immediately, Danny’s hand came up, catching Dash’s fist. Dash let out a barely audible noise of pain - which made sense, he had just done the equivalent of punching a brick wall.

“Lay. Off.” Danny hissed, tightening his grip on Dash’s hand threateningly before pushing Dash back.

Dash stumbled backwards, shaking the hand Danny had gripped. “Why don’t you make me, geek?”

“Danny…” Sam said beside him, tugging on his sleeve.

Even as she did that, though, Danny heard the students around him beginning to chant. “Fight! Fight! Fight!”

Danny let his backpack slide off his shoulder, landing with a loud thump on the floor. “Y’know what, Dash? I think I will.” Danny said, crouching down slightly and rolling his shoulders to loosen them, a more-than-slightly feral grin on his face. He was tired, he was over this, and he was so fucking done.

Surprise flickered across Dash’s face but he didn’t back down, raising both of his fists up.

“Fight! Fight! Fight!” The chanting continued.

“You gonna stand there and look stupid all day? It really is one of the few skills you’ve mastered.” Danny said, still looking a touch too feral.

Dash took the bait, lunging forward and aiming a fist towards Danny’s stomach.

Too easy.

Danny sidestepped him, hooking one of his feet behind Dash’s ankles and pushing while simultaneously driving an elbow into Dash’s back. Dash yelped as he fell, slamming his face into the locker.

A collective gasp went through the surrounding students. Everyone had been expecting Danny to get a tooth punched out or something, not for wimpy Fenton to nearly lay out their star quarterback.

“That the best you got, Baxter?” Danny taunted, stepping backwards.

“Danny, stop!” Sam called but Danny ignored her.

“Cheap shot, loser.” Dash spat back, getting back to his feet.

“So I’m fighting like you?”

Dash tried to rush him again and Danny just grinned wider. He jumped to the side and took one of Dash’s arms in both hands. He twirled both of them around, launching Dash back directly into the lockers.

Dash recovered faster this time and repeatedly tried to slam his fists into Danny’s face. Danny ducked and weaved, hands behind his back, letting Dash tire himself out. After several swings from Dash, Danny dropped and lashed out one of his legs, knocking Dash’s feet out from under him.

Dash fell and landed with a sharp, pained intake of breath, his back slamming against the linoleum floor.

“Where the hell did you learn how to fight like that, Fenton?” Dash wheezed, pushing himself up into a sitting position.

“My mom has three black belts.” Danny said, shrugging. It technically wasn’t a lie - his mom did have that, it just wasn’t where he learned to fight. “Now fuck off.” He added as he stepped around Dash, spinning the combination to his locker and grabbing his lunchbox.

People parted for him as he walked, many with shocked, open mouthed stares.

Sam and Tuck tagged along behind him.

“Seriously, Danny?” Sam hissed.

At the same time, Tucker said, “Nice one, Danny!”

He was still sleep deprived, he was still so over all the ghosts recently, but maybe now he could avoid fights of a human nature for a little while.

And less fights meant more naps, he determined as he laid his head down on the lunch table and promptly passed out, his friends his ever vigilant guards.

[karmawonders]

Congrats on 800 followers!!!

Ever since I learned about SAGAU, I have been nervous to play music (idk why though??) But I listen to people like Cupcakke and Ayesha and now I'm wondering what the acolytes' reactions would be to the creator playing weird music ^^

🌸Thank you, thank you!🌸

Ahh, I do enjoy myself some good Cupcakke and Ayesha. I got both of em on my playlist, haha! I listen to some pretty out there music as well, if hyper-pop counts as weird. Who knows~ Anyway somehow this became Consort!Diluc and I apologize, my brain went running with this ask and it became.. this.

Warnings: Sexual Content. Cult and Self Aware AU. Somewhat Yandere.

Contents: This could be considered a crackpost at some points. Includes the song squidwards nose / commentary from because I bop to it, aight? . There is mention of "holy dildo." Forgive me i thought it was funny. Diluc is completely devoted to you(he wants to be your consort) and is suddenly worried about his dick size. Not beta read we die like rex-lapis.

Anyway!

I imagine it would be a normal day like any other in Mondstadt. The city is bustling, Flora giving people cute little flower crowns to promote her flower shop, bards singing about various topics and styles, Knights of Favonius helping people find lost cats, etc etc.

In the middle of the town square, stands your current puppets (thats what I call the"vessles" in my au) , in this case the traveller. I imagine depending on the emotional connection/friendship level you have to each of your puppets, people can sometimes hear you through them. Like a walking speaker or smth.

Since the twins don't got a friendship level, its just the equivalent of maxed out. They're crafting up some condensed resin for you, since you were AFK and they knew you were going to do so anyway. They were doing their best to ignore the loud music that they are emitting whilst doing so, Timaeus and others looking at them with wide eyes.

It isn't often your non-puppets hear obvious signs of the creator themselves, ya know! Literally everyone likes listening to you, whether it's Lofi music, rock, pop, or your voice itself!

Whenever they hear your voice from one of your more connected puppets, everyone is just filled with bubbles of happiness and excitement. Like! yay! I am directly in the High Gods presence! Sorta! Not really but its stilly exciting!

This time though, its a bit more of a "Ayo what the fuck?" sort of feeling instead of the usual.

Loudly blaring from their beings, was Cupcakke, and the iconic song "Squidward Nose".

Jean? Red faced, making sure no children are in the area, hands covering her face as she does her best, and fails, to think on who "dora the explorer" is, instead thinking about her god wanting a dick apparently as large as "squidwards nose". She has the church and the sisters notate this in a book. Might be some form of holy dildo or something, who knows.

Lisa is laughing her ass off the entire time, patting her on the back as she helps annotate notable things in the song with a few of the sisters from the Cathedral. Gotta keep their holy bible updated, afterall. She is tempted to write a new thesis for the scholars at Sumeru just for kicks and giggles about how their High God could potentially be more human than formerly assumed. She has a great new evidence, after all~ then again, the scholars at Sumeru are batshit crazy, so many not.

Venti is right at the travellers side, committing the song to his memory the best he can. Definitely getting in the way of them actually crafting the Resin, much to the twin's annoyance. He is always at whoevers side when you are playing any type of music, the music is completely new to him after all. You can bet he will be doing his best to sing the song at any late night tavern performances, even if he isn't getting all the references outside the obvious sexual stuff. Its an instant hit at Angels share, not just because Venti is singing it, but because the High God apparently likes the song as well. Also because its a great song.

Speaking of Angels Share, Diluc's face, is obviously, also as red as tomato when he hears Venti reciting the song later. He enjoys very much being a puppet, and he is definitely incredibly devoted to the High God. (aka you). He has to be devoted if he wants to fully commit himself to you, and possibly be your consort if you come down to Teyvat one day! This entire situation is completely uncouth, much to his dismay. He thinks its ruining your image before he realizes it is simply expanding it. Also, he is very upset. He is packing down there, definitely. But now he is self conscious because what if squidwards nose is better? He should honestly really kick out Venti, even is he is an Archon. Its getting in the way of his business.

Kaeya and Rosaria know about Diluc's somewhat obsessive worship and desire to be your consort, and they also know exactly why thats he is so red faced and upset and Venti's song. And because they absolutely enjoy it, they keep on giving Venti bottles of alcohol for encores of the song. And more, and more. Until Diluc has to excuse himself and leave. They are laughing the entire fuckin time. They always enjoy listening to your music whenever its playing, and they definitely agree that you should play similar songs more often. Its incredibly amusing.

🌸

Anywho's, that was fun to write! I do not know why Diluc was on the mind, but to be honest, I simp for the man highkey soooo-

Hope that was all alright for you dear Anon, and I hope you have a good day!

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