#happiest season fanfic

[evangelinedanvers]

Abby chewed on her lip as she looked across the kitchen table at her girlfriend. She’d done so so often that now her lips were chapped, dry and prone to bleeding. Despite her worry, she had kept silent. Whatever was bothering Harper, she would tell her in her own time. 

The silence was palpable. Things hadn’t been right since they had both moved to be closer to Harper’s family.  Abby could tell something was wrong. Harper was definitely keeping something from her. She lowered her head. She really didn’t want to ask, but they couldn’t carry on in the denial that everything was fine. She couldn’t keep lying to herself. Harper would never be ready without a little pushing. With a heavy sigh, she lifted her head so that she could look into her fiance’s eyes. “Harper, what’s wrong? You’ve been distant ever since we moved. When you do talk I just feel like you’re mad at me. I’ve gone over and over in my mind and I can’t think of anything I could have done.”

For a moment, Harper’s eyes widened, but she soon recovered a calmer expression. “Nothing. Everything’s fine.” Her quick, clipped response suggested otherwise.

“Oh. Okay.” Abby shrugged, although she wasn’t about to just let the matter slide. The lie was disappointing. Every problem they had in their relationship had stemmed from Harper being too afraid to be honest. Her spoon, which had been gripped tightly in her fingers, clattered against the table. Breakfast had suddenly become very unappetising.  “I mean, I thought we’d learned a lesson around pretending everything’s okay when it’s not.” She shrugged again before mumbling, “If you think that’s best though, whatever.”

Harper’s brow furrowed. Abby felt soft, searching, eyes imploring her to let it go. Harper grabbed the edge of the table as it became clear that Abby wasn’t budging. Her grip made the tension she was feeling apparent. She couldn’t quite meet Abby’s eyes as she rushed out the thing that had been bothering her. “I don’t like that you’re spending so much time with Riley.”

Abby laughed, although it was quiet and full of sarcasm. “Excuse me. What?”

“We moved so that I could spend more time with my parents and sisters. Not so that you could spend more time with Riley.”

“So, what, I’m not allowed to have friends?” Abby shook her head. She’d been able to forgive a lot; able to understand some of Harper’s choices. However, controlling behaviour was something she would never tolerate. “What do you want me to do when you’re busy writing?”

Harper rolled her eyes. “You’re allowed to have friends, Abby. You just don’t need to be friends with my ex.”

“Oh. Okay. Cool. I get it. I’ll just go make some guy friends. Oh,” Abby paused, a finger in the air, as though a thought was only just occurring to her. “No, wait. You probably still fucked them too.”

Harper was silent, her lips parted slightly. The words had hurt her. It wasn’t a fair thing for Abby to say, and she knew that.

“Sorry.” Abby stood, getting ready to walk away from the argument. She knew she’d gone too far and didn’t want to make things any worse. “That wasn’t..” Embarrassed, she awkwardly rubbed the back of her neck with her hand. “Sorry. I didn’t mean that. I just don’t see what the problem is.”

“The problem is that,” for a moment Harper buried her face in her hands, looking embarrassed by what she was about to say. “Riley likes you, okay? I feel like a teenager again even caring about that. Which is why I hadn’t said anything.”

“What? No,” Abby shook her head as a blush crept onto her face. “You’re wrong. Besides, I’m not, it doesn’t go both ways. I love you.”

“So, we agree?”

“Oh, no. No, we do not agree. Riley is literally my only friend here. Everyone else still thinks I’m a common criminal. Plus you’re my girlfriend, not my mom.” 

“Abby, I...please?”

“If you can’t trust me,” Abby twisted her engagement ring from her finger and threw it down onto the table. “Maybe we shouldn’t be getting married.”

“Yeah,” Harper nodded, despite the tears that had begun to slowly trickle down her cheeks. “Maybe we shouldn’t.”

“Hey,” Abby said softly. She’d never meant for that to happen. She’d never meant to make Harper cry. She was about to go to her, wipe her tears away with her thumb and tell her that she loved her and everything would be okay. She stopped herself, though. She couldn’t keep giving in every time Harper cried. “I’m going out.”

“Abby, wait. This is stupid. Please, just,” she picked up Abby’s ring and held it out to her. “At least put this back on. Please?”

“No. I’m done. I’m out.”

Riley hadn’t been expecting Abby to call her, but she certainly hadn’t been disappointed when her name flashed up on her screen. A few minutes later and she was sitting across from her in their usual haunt. Her eyes narrowed as she observed a tense Abby, who gripped her coffee mug so tightly that Riley was afraid it might shatter. Her red eyes also alerted Riley to the fact that Abby had been crying.

“I think this is probably a really stupid question,” Riley said as she dropped a cube of sugar into her black coffee and gave it a stir. She needed to do something with her hands. Anything to distract. Anything to stop her from grabbing Abby’s hands and telling her that whatever it was, it was okay. Whatever it was, she would fix it. No. She had to stay calm.  “Because the answer is very clearly no, but are you okay?”

Abby shook her head. “I think I just ended things with Harper,” she mumbled. 

“What?” Riley spluttered as she stopped stirring her coffee, although her fingers still gripped the spoon. “Why?” 

“Things have been off between us since we moved.” Abby shrugged. She looked tired. To Riley, she looked like someone who had simply given up. “Today I finally asked what’s going on and she insisted that I cut contact with you because apparently you like me. Which is obviously crazy.”

“Oh,” Riley nodded. “Yeah, totally. Totally crazy. Harper is just insane in the brain, alright.” She smiled, although it was really more of a grimace than a smile.

Abby nodded, then twisted her fingers together, something Riley had noticed she did a lot when anxious. “Do you forgive Harper?” Abby questioned, out of the blue. “For, you know, outing you to protect herself?”

Riley’s answer was immediate. “Yes. Absolutely. She was a teenager and she was scared. And, honestly? If it had been the other way around I don’t think I could say I wouldn’t have done the same. I’m gonna guess you don’t? For lying to you about her family, I mean.” “You wouldn’t have. I’m not sure whether I do or not. I thought I did.”

Riley chuckled. It was nice that Abby thought so much of her, but she had definitely grown a lot since her teenage years. Really, it was a shame that she found herself unable to say the same of Harper. “That’s nice that you think that, but you didn’t know me then.” She sighed. She was in a fight with herself, struggling to make sure that her words held no bias. “This is probably a super biased opinion, but how Harper treated you was wrong. She’s an adult now. To force you back into the closet without a word of warning was absolutely not okay. She had reasons, but reasons are not free passes to treat people you care about like crap. If you’re struggling to forgive her for that, it’s valid. You’re valid.”

“I thought I was over it,” Abby said slowly, obviously still processing how she felt, “but she still keeps things from me. I don’t think I can be with someone who won’t talk to me unless I force the point. That’s not how I roll.”

Riley nodded. Her expression was neutral, but then for a moment her brow furrowed, betraying the consternation that the conversation caused. “Abby, I don’t think I’m the best person for you to talk to about this.”

Abby didn’t speak, but raised her eyebrows, waiting for further explanation.

“Harper isn’t wrong.”

“Oh,” Abby said softly. “That complicates things”

“No, it doesn’t,” She blurted out, desperate not to lose Abby’s friendship.  “I can see how much you love Harper, I would never come between you two. I just can’t promise that any advice I give you isn’t tainted.”

“Oh, yeah. No, I get that. Fuck.” Abby rested her forehead in the palm of her hand.

“You good?”

Abby shook her head

“Do you need me to go?” “No. It’s just, you’re really the only friend I have here and, really, are you gonna wanna stick around to be just my friend?”

“Hey, hey.” she leaned across the table and grabbed Abby’s arm, gently pulling her hand away from her head, “Look at me. Yes, I am attracted to you. I am not, however, about to go home and start writing poetry about how heartbreaking it is to see you with another woman. Chill out.”

“Okay.” Abby chewed on her lip. “But what if I said it’s a mutual attraction. What if I said right now I want to, i don’t know, take you out to dinner right now. Wine, dine and sixty-nine.”

Riley had chosen an in opportune moment to take a sip of her coffee, and found herself choking on it a little as she heard Abby’s comment. “First of all, there will be no sixty-nining ever. Secondly, if that’s the best pick-up line you have, I don’t think we have anything to worry about. Thirdly, no.”

“No?” Riley was sure that she heard disappointment in Abby’s voice, but it didn’t matter. 

“I actually value our friendship. Tomorrow you’d wake up, realise how much you love Harper and hate me for ever allowing you to jeopardize what you have with her. You’re not thinking clearly right now and I’m not taking advantage of that.” It was tempting though. So tempting.

“I was only kidding.”

“No, you weren’t.” Riley shook her head. “You’re angry and you’re looking for ways to act out. I am not that desperate.”

Abby shook her head “Maybe you’re half right, but I wouldn’t ever just use you. I do, uh. I am attracted to you.”

“Yeah? Who isn’t?” Riley asked, followed by a smirk.

“Straight women?” “Wrong.” Again, the smirk.

Abby smiled for the first time during the whole conversation. Riley wasn’t too sure whether Abby believed her or not, but it was nice to have an air of mystery.

“Hey, Abby?”

“Yeah?”

“While the sixty-nine is a hard no, I’m not opposed to wine, dine and supine. If things with you and Harper really don’t work out.” She was smiling, but her face fell as she realised Abby wasn’t wearing her ring. It had been nice to pretend for a moment, to tease. However, the missing ring made everything feel very real. “Abby, where’s your ring?”

“I was mad. I took it off when we were fighting.” She shrugged. “It was stupid.”

“Please don’t throw everything away over something so stupid. Don’t fight over me. I’m really, really not worth it.” Riley grabbed up her bag and rose quickly “I, I have to go. But call me, okay? Let me know,” her voice broke, but she cleared her throat and regained her composure, “let me know how things go.”

Riley felt like she couldn’t catch a breath as she left the cafeteria, moving as fast as she could. Once outside, she leaned against the wall of the place, trying to ground herself, trying to slow down her breathing. She tried to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall.

 For so long she’s refused to allow herself to be vulnerable. The way in which Harper had forced her to come out had left her unable to ever really trust anyone to allow for anything more than a one night stand. She didn’t let people in; she didn’t let people have the chance to stab her in the back. With Abby, she had a strong sense that she was going to end up hurt and it wouldn’t even be Abby’s fault. A happy ending in any capacity wasn’t on the horizon. She knew that. And yet, she couldn’t bring herself to just walk away. As stupid as it might be, she felt a need to see their friendship through to it’s bloody end.

Having forgotten to pick up her keys when she stormed out, Abby found herself ringing the doorbell to her own home. It was a little embarrassing, really. She had a hard time pressing her finger against the button and hesitated several times before doing so. Abby knew she hadn’t acted in the most mature manner. Tearing her ring off, going straight to see Riley. It was stupid and crazy and she found herself struggling to think why it had ever seemed like a sensible idea. 

The door opened, far too slowly. Abby held her breath, unsure how Harper would react to her return.

Harper said nothing, which somehow felt worse than if she had yelled. Her arms were folded. Her eyebrows were raised. Abby knew she didn’t deserve such a calm welcome.

Abby pushed a few strands of her hair behind her ear before bowing her head and shoving her hands deep into the pockets of her jacket. The silence was awkward, as Harper’s eyes bored into her.  “I’m sorry,” she mumbled.

“It’s okay,” Harper admitted with a shrug of her shoulders. “I have no right to tell you who to spend time with. I just wish you hadn’t stormed off as you did. I also wish we’d admitted to ourselves earlier that things just aren’t working out.”

Abby’s brow furrowed. She wasn’t sure exactly when they had admitted thing’s weren’t working out, but it hardly mattered. She licked her lips. Anxiety had caused her mouth to suddenly become very dry. She didn’t know whether to be honest or hide the truth in order to smooth things over. Of course, lies had never helped their relationship. “Can I come in?” She asked stupidly, as if she didn’t live there.

Harper nodded then moved to one side to allow Abby access.

Abby walked in and headed for the lounge. “Come sit with me?”

Again, Harper nodded. Still, she was silent. She seemed distant, her face was very pale. Abby knew that nothing good was about to happen, but she made the decision then that whatever did happen, it would be as good as it possibly could be.

Sitting on their small, leather sofa felt rather too intimate for the inevitable conversation. Pushed close together, it almost felt as though things could be okay again. It almost felt as though they should talk about how their relationship could move forward. No. It would only delay the inevitable and cause further pain in the long run. Still, despite this she still took a hold of Harper’s hand, although she perhaps gripped it much more tightly than she ever had before. Harper didn’t object or try to stop her.

“I have to be honest. I just met with Riley and uh, it was kinda stupid, considering what we just fought about,” she chuckled, it suddenly occurring to her how ridiculous the situation was. “You weren’t wrong.”

Harper looked surprised, her eyes widening. “I didn’t realise that’s who you’d gone to, but I should have known,” she sighed. “It’s fine,” Harper said, although her quiet, melancholic voice suggested that nothing was really fine. “We both know that this isn’t just about Riley. This is about us just not working any more. I’ve always been really good at being who the people I’m around needed me to be. Since I came out to my parents I’ve been trying to just be more me. Abby. I’m not saying you should just go straight to Riley and start something with her. But um. God, this is so embarrassing,” she rolled her eyes, looking up at the ceiling for a moment. “When we met I could tell you needed someone with an edge. Someone who wasn’t afraid to just take the bull by the horns, you know? That’s not really me. So I used to ask myself what would Riley do? Riley is literally perfect for you. In some ways she’s who you fell in love with, and that’s why i got so freaked out to have her suddenly around again”

“No. I fell in love with a version of you, not Riley. I don’t love Riley. I haven’t even known her long enough to say that.  I’m really sorry that you didn’t get to come out in the best way. But, like. We can work through that together. I’m willing to go to therapy with you. Anything” She couldn’t help it. Despite having told herself no, she ended up trying anyway. Agreeing to therapy was a big thing for Abby. She’d been when her parents had died and found the whole process so contrived. She’d been unable to be open in such an environment and after hours of stilted conversation with a clearly frustrated therapist, she had sworn never to attempt such a thing again.

“Oh, Abby.” For a moment Harpers gentle tone made it seem as though she was going to say yes, but then the other seemed to come to her senses. “We have to let each other go,” she said as she glanced towards their hands, hers still clasped within Abby’s. “It’s really stupid of us to try to cling to something that’s never gonna be what either of us wants it to be. I love you, but it’s like we’re running perpendicular. So, so close. But we’re never quite gonna be in exactly the same place at the same time.”

“I love you too,” Abby’s voice wavered.

“Do you? Or do you love a version of me who doesn’t exist any more? A version who you hope to see every day. Do you love me, or are you just waiting, hoping things are gonna go back to how they were. They’re not.”

“I don’t know.” Abby shook her head, suddenly feeling very lost and confused.

“Well, I do,” Harper said as she pulled her hand out of Abby’s.  “I also know that we’re ending this now, before we hate each other.” Now it was time for Harper’s voice to break. “Cos I don’t think I can handle you hating me,” she said in a whisper before wiping away her tears.

“I would never hate you,” Abby declared passionately, sounding almost angry that Harper thought such a thing could ever be possible.

“You would. Eventually. Give me your hand.”

“I don’t...no.” Even with her mind made up, she still fought against it. Of course she did. She was terrified of being left all alone again. Alone in the world with no clue how to be alone. Of course, this time would be different. This time she would know what to do. Not that it made the pain and fear any less.

“Yes.” Harper slipped her engagement ring from her finger and pressed it into Abby’s palm, along with Abby’s own ring which she had been carrying in her pocket. “Take them. I want you to have them. We had some good times. Remember those. I’m gonna move in with mom and dad for a bit.”

Abby sighed, before standing. “I need a minute,” She said as she felt her chest tighten and suddenly the simple act of breathing felt almost impossible.

Alone in the bathroom, Abby clung to the sink as she stared into the mirror, wondering how on earth she had gotten to where she was. She was far too old to be looking for the right person. Too much longer and she really was going to wind up alone. And then she realised, she wasn’t upset at losing Harper, simply terrified of the prospect of being alone. That’s when she knew that the decision was correct. Any doubts left. She had her moment. She shed a few tears before splashing some cold water into her face, taking a deep breath and going back out to face something that would be so very difficult whilst also being exactly what both of them needed.

“You need any help packing?” Abby asked brightly as she unclasped the necklace she wore and slid the two rings Harper had given her onto it. The brightness was slightly forced, but it showed how she intended to continue. She wouldn’t dwell. She refused to act sad, even though her heart was just a little broken. She had loved Harper once, after all. The least she could do was be amicable, even if they wound up not being friends. “Not that I’m trying to rush you.”

“Oh, God, yes please. If you don’t mind. You don’t have to.”

“No, but I want to. Like you said, I don’t hate you. Yet,” she added with a wink.

Harper smiled, then her eyes narrowed slightly as she hesitated. “Are we sure this is the right thing?”

“Were you happy?”

Harper shook her head. 

“We both deserve to be happy. So yeah,” Abby chewed on her lip, her vow to not be sad wavering for a moment. “This kinda sucks. But it’s the right thing to do.”

Months had passed and Abby had kept to herself. Working, mostly. She had managed to find employment as an art gallery manager. She considered herself lucky. She knew how many people didn’t find jobs even remotely linked to their chosen fields of study. But she had. Her life may have been fucked. She may have been alone, and she may have been certain that the universe had decided for her on the day her parents had died that alone would be her destiny; but at least she had a job. So she couldn’t complain, right?

Neither Harper or Riley reached out to her during those months. Harper because there really wasn’t much to say. They’d both moved on from a relationship that had never been destined to work in the long run. Riley because she was smarter than that. Abby was sure she just knew that she just needed her space to recover and move on from her previous relationship. To immediately continue a friendship with someone who had been a big part in the collapse of that relationship seemed as though it would be dooming that friendship to fail. As much as some days really sucked, as much as some days Abby felt as though she had no one in the world and would have loved nothing more than to just fall into Riley’s arms and cry and have her friend back she knew that she couldn’t. They both wanted more. And to have more, to give into that lust so soon would only lead to destruction. Abby wouldn’t do that. She wouldn’t fall into the clutches of a self-fulfilling prophecy. As much as she may have believed that to be alone was her destiny, she still had to cling on to some hope. Hope that if she at least tried to do the right things that maybe one day someone would stay. Because if she didn’t cling to that hope, if she didn’t kid herself that perhaps there was some kind of possibility, she would be right back to where she had been when her parents had died; in hospital; deemed a risk to herself; wondering what the point of living was if only to be alone; no one needed her. The world wasn’t built to be lived in alone, so it was just hard to see the point. So she had to. She just had to keep believing, because she didn’t want to die.

Eventually, though, Abby felt ready. Terrified, but ready. She felt ready to reach out to Riley to see if the doctor had any interest in resuming their friendship.

Her fingers tapped furiously against her phone, typing a message to Riley, which promptly got deleted. It was perhaps the tenth message to have gone the same way. Abby was nervous; jittery; hyped up on coffee and really just unsure of what to say. Her leg bounced up and down before she sighed and cradled her head in her hands. She knew she was over thinking things. She knew she just needed to calm down.  A deep breath and then she laughed as she remembered this wasn’t Harper. She didn’t need to write an essay. There wouldn’t be questions. There just wouldn’t. Because Riley … she just always seemed to get things without being told. So, finally, Abby sent out the perfect text. ‘Hey’

The response was almost instant. ‘Hey! What’s up?’

‘I miss you’

‘My place. Tonight. Bring wine. Bring ice cream.’

Abby was no longer nervous as she rang Riley’s doorbell but excited instead. It felt as though perhaps their friendship could reach new grounds, but she didn’t care. It didn’t matter. As long as she hadn’t lost her friend in all of the mess, she couldn’t be happier. 

The door opened to a Riley she hadn’t seen before. Hair a little dishevelled, dressed in a kimono, no makeup. Still, Abby had to admit to herself that even so she was still attractive. In fact … Abby chewed on her lip, wondering if perhaps Riley was perhaps even more alluring in the relaxed state rather than the suits she had become used to.

 “Hey. Hi. How are you?” Riley asked as she took the wine that Abby held out.

“Um, I’m good? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. Fine. Confession though, I started on the wine already.”

“Oh. That’s fine,” Abby shrugged. “How’ve you been? It’s been a while?”

Riley hesitated for a moment “Oh, you know me. Work hard, play hard. I’ve been good. Never better.” She smiled her easy, charming smile and Abby forgot that for a moment she’d felt that nothing was okay. “More importantly, how have you been?”

“Kinda miserable. Could be worse. Can’t complain really.”

“Abby, break-ups suck. You’re allowed to complain.”

“No. No, I don’t wan’t to be morose, you know?”

“Well, tonight we chill. Wine, ice cream, trash TV; make fun of the Kardashians. Tomorrow night, you’re gonna live. We can go out and do something fun and crazy. If you feel up to it.”

“Yeah,” Abby nodded. “Yeah. Totally.” 

“Come on. It’s been too long,” Riley said as she lead Abby into her lounge.

The evening proceeded as Riley had predicted. It was almost as though nothing had changed in the time that they had been apart. Which was a relief. Abby felt herself able to breathe easy again for the first time in a while. In a moment of silence she was looking up at Riley, thinking about how even though everything was normal, there was still an air of things unsaid. They both wanted more than friendship; that was no longer a secret. Abby didn’t quite dare bring it up though. Destroying the first feeling or normalcy she’d had for months to try to quell the feeling that perhaps things weren’t quite normal just wasn’t worth it. Apparently for Riley it was.

“You terrify me.” Riley announced out of the blue. Her voice was quiet in a way that Abby had never heard it before. Abby was so used to an air of confidence from Riley. This side of her was confusing, but almost nice to see. Riley was vulnerable. She wasn’t, perhaps, as perfect and as impenetrable as she had always seemed.

“Excuse me? How? I’m like, tiny. If anything, I should be scared of you,” Abby retorted, smirking, looking up at Riley from her place on the floor. Riley had tried to get her to sit on the sofa with her, but Abby had always found comfort sitting on floors. She wasn’t even sure what it was. There was just something about being on the ground that had a calming effect.

“Oh, fuck. I think maybe I overdid it a bit on the wine. No, no. I didn’t mean … absolutely, I could kick your ass if it came to it. I meant that I care about you so much that it scares me.”

“Riley? Are we good?”

“Good? Why would we not be good? Do you … do you not think we’re good?” Riley shook her head, sighing “I fucking knew it. This is too soon. You need more time. You need to … to … you need friends who you don’t wanna fuck. I’m not gonna be your rebound.”

“Whoa, okay. How much wine?”

“Enough.”

Before Abby really knew what was happening, Riley had slipped herself off the sofa. “Enough to do this,” she said before leaning in, kissing Abby, one hand on the floor to hold herself up as the other reached up and slipped open a couple of buttons of Abby’s shirt.

For a moment Abby melted and gave in to what she’d wanted for so long. She allowed Riley’s lips to brush against hers; allowed frantic, drunken fingers to pull at the buttons of her shirt. Then she realised that it was an awful idea. She didn’t want a few moments of pleasure. Not if it meant ruining any future friendship or relationship she could ever have with Riley. “Whoa, hey. No. Not happening,” Abby said as she pushed Riley away.

“Why? I thought…”

“Not like this,” Abby said, shaking her head. “I…” She reached over, her thumb gently grazing Riley’s lip. “I want to, but slowly and soberly. And … call me old fashioned if you want, but let’s have a few dates before we get into each other’s pants. I just really don’t want to ruin our friendship.” 

“Abby, I haven’t dated for a long time. It’s not … I don’t … Relationships aren’t my thing.”

“Oh? How long?”

“Since Harper.”

“Holy shit.”

[llycaons]

also romcoms tend to be very tropey and I dislike most romance tropes so.

[nottheweirdest]

Fanfic Writer Emoji Ask Game Part II

💖 Which of your fics is your pride and joy? 🎥 Pick a fic and I'll tell you the song I imagine playing during its movie trailer.

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👄 Your OTP are having their first kiss. What song do you imagine is playing?

🎭What genre of writing comes easiest to you?

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❓Insert your own question here!

[mountymase]

you don't get to tell me about sad

file two - lewis hamilton

a/n: i’m so unserious i cannot even- 🥲 i didn’t plan to post this today but i was on a mission. it’s my first lh44 fanfic and i’m actually proud of it. hope you like it! although it ends open to a part two, i truly don’t plan on writing, just so you know! 🤍

tw: angst, cheating, sort of toxic love/relationship, divorced parents, mentions of anxiety, twin pregnancy. a bit of “illicit affairs” inspiration.

1.449k words

Everything pointed towards one direction: you getting heartbroken in the end. Heavily heartbroken, to a point, it’d become hard to breathe and face the world as if he’d never been part of your life - how would you be able to forget him and the way the corners of his eyes wrinkled when he laughed, the way his hands instantly searched for your face to kiss you whenever you said something that’d make him laugh?

Lewis was drawn to you and your energetic personality the moment you met, at an FIA gala years ago, and everything about your relationship moved on so fast you were swept off your feet. Like a hurricane, Lewis Hamiton turned your life upside down in a way you’d never be able to explain - and that’s how it went for the next four years. You built a house, a life, a family.

When the twins were born, you thought life couldn’t be more complete, but then Lewis won his 7th World Championship the same year and you made a surprise appearance the moment he stood on the highest spot of the podium, where he belonged. You still remembered the way his eyes widened and jaw dropped, but his facial expression quickly switched to the happiest you’d ever seen him - the sparkle in his teary eyes and the way he never stopped looking at you. As soon as the champagne ceremony was over, Lewis rushed to find you, without even caring how all the cameras had their focus on the two of you as you kissed passionately.

“Where are they?” he breathed against your lips, asking for the twins. You motioned to the garage with your head, where your parents stood with each baby in their arms. Lewis sighed in relief, two weeks were too much time away from Daisy and Jude - the chubby tiny humans wiggled their feet seeing their papa coming closer and that’s how you were living the life that was meant for you.

Things got wonderfully overwhelming when, much to your and Lewis’ surprise, the two lines on five different pregnancy tests were as clear as the Spanish sun outside, as you enjoyed your summer vacation. The twins were just eight months and still needed all of your attention - with Lewis away most of the time and nowhere near thinking of retiring from F1, you had to count on with yours and his parents, so your constant absence during the new season was deeply missed by everyone.

You genuinely thought this new baby would add more joy to what was already a happy life - Lewis could barely contain his excitement and made sure the whole world knew about the family’s new and unexpected addiction, but by the time you were about to give birth again things had drastically changed.

He wasn’t your Lewis anymore, but you wouldn’t be the annoying wife, you wouldn’t pressure him so you’ve watched the love of your life slowly distancing himself from you as a husband. Lewis didn’t touch you anymore and the passionate kisses were no longer there. You knew very well how much it affected him seeing Red Bull’s and Max’s dominance on the sport that he, not long ago, was the absolute favourite - but something you two promised the day before you tied the knot, was to always seek each other whenever trouble approached and you felt like it could have an impact on your marriage.

Now, sitting on the expensive sofa of your Monaco luxurious penthouse, with your three children still asleep, you waited for the sun to rise as your eyes couldn’t move from the sparkling diamonds on your ring finger. The engagement ring, the wedding band, and the eternity ring Lewis gifted you when the twins were born. Each ring represented the most perfect memory and the life you had built with the man you loved.

When you hear your bedroom door open and slow, almost silent steps towards you, you can also feel anxiety bubbling up your stomach and making your head spin. It had to be now, or you wouldn’t have the guts to do it anymore.

“Good morning, Lew.” He stopped when he heard your voice, eyebrows scrunching in confusion. You never woke up this early whenever you were in Monaco. “Can you sit here with me?”

It wasn’t a surprise when Lewis sat on the opposite side, facing you as the first rays of sunshine found their way through the still closed curtains. His face was perfectly illuminated by the sun, and that’s when a wave of painful realisation hit you - there was no trace of love nor admiration he usually had in his eyes whenever he was looking at you. So this would have to go down the hard way.

“Why are you up so early?” The lack of emotion in his voice made you gulp. You desperately wanted to shake and punch him until he was back to normal.

“I don’t want to fight, especially under the same roof as the kids.” Lewis moved uncomfortably on the armchair, waiting for you to continue. “But I need you to know that I know.”

“K-know what?”

“That you’ve been cheating.”

Those four words put an end to your marriage and Lewis used the most pathetic excuse to justify his poor actions, saying how sad he was with how the season was going and that he didn’t feel good enough anymore - and on top of that, he also added to his lame speech how busy you’ve been with the kids. “You don’t get to tell me about sad,” was the only thing you could send back to him, so full of agonising anger that the thought of his hands touching another woman’s body while you were the dedicated wife and mother made you want to throw up.

Betrayed and shattered, you forced yourself to take one step closer to moving on each day the sun invaded your new bedroom - one recently acquired with years of hard work and not with divorce money. As you navigated through the painful aftermath of being exposed to the media, Lewis faced the consequence of his actions with most of the public turning his back on him once the cheating went public and you knew damn well how. The thick tan line on your ring finger and your children playing at the beach under the afternoon sun were the only things now that represented Lewis in your life.

You were never open to the possibility of reconciliation, and as you moved on the best you could, you had to deal with an insisting Lewis bringing you flowers each time he showed up to his father duties - one he performed incredibly well.

On a night out with Susie Wolff, you confessed how much you missed him in your life but also how you only thought about him touching another woman. Would you ever be able to let go, to allow yourself to be loved again and live a happy life? Lewis couldn’t be the only option.

“Toto cheated once,” Susie admitted, her cheeks blushing as your eyes widened. “I know you are already divorced, but it’s up to you to discover if you want to embark on a journey of healing and forgiveness. To confront your vulnerabilities, and insecurities, and acknowledge what caused the cracks in your marriage that led to the affair.”

Susie made it all sound so simple, but it was deeper than that.

You concluded that, despite having to see him in your children’s faces every day, it’d be easier to deal with it for a while as if Lewis Hamilton was gone forever - dead, even, as awful as it sounded to you. To be happy and healthy for your babies, you have to feel it for yourself first. So, that’s when you decided that you’d have to avoid him for as long as you could and that’s what you did. Your mother was responsible for meeting him now whenever he showed up to pick up the kids, and from a respectful distance, Lewis watched you moving on.

First, on your own.

Then, with someone new. Someone who was to you what he couldn’t be for eternity, as he promised the day he proposed.

He watched you look as gorgeous as the day you met at that gala, he watched his children accept the new man in your life, he watched you engaged again and your fiancé become the newest Formula 1 champion.

Lewis watched you living the life you deserved and openly hoped he’d have the chance to give you again, no matter what it’d cost, because for you he’d ruin himself a million little times.

And secretly, so would you.

[alargehunkofdebris]

the necessary anguish of the Good Omens 2 finale

Ah ok. So after 4 years of waiting post Season One and ten cumulative years of bookish fannery, I watched bonified New Content of Good Omens. And when those credits rolled, I sat there, not in my expected state of pleasant satisfaction, but in a state of abject shock.

I actually don’t know if I’ve ever had such a reaction to a show before. Or, rather, that I could still have such a reaction. I’m thirty, for goodness sakes – I was planning on being thrilled and charmed and entertained, not having my hands shake so much that it was hard to type a text. I wasn’t planning on losing an entire night of sleep because my heart wouldn’t stop pounding really hard, Neil. This was not expected. I had an estate sale to run the next day – by God, I needed that sleep.

 Anyway. These are my thoughts on the season, and on this upswell of mourning/unhappiness at such a gut-wrenching ending. As always, this are my dumb opinions and nothing more; take with a grain of salt, etc. 

I have seen a lot of suffering on Tumblr today. Everyone is in pain, and it makes sense. I, too, am in pain. But I might be in the minority, because I thanked God/Mr. Gaiman when things turned to pure pain in the end. Because narratively, despite the anguish we all feel, this is how it needs to be. And I was getting real worried there for a second.

When we have a mini-series (ie, a show with a set number of seasons) it can’t act the same as a series without a set end. We’ve got three potential seasons; therefore, they logically should behave like a three-act play, or the three acts in the standard Western movie/book plot. This middle season is the middle act, the second act. While it definitely doesn’t work exactly the same way, and needs its own story arc to work as a season, it is still functionally the middle part of one overarching plot.

And what usually happens near the end of the second act? All Is Lost, and the Dark Night of the Soul.

We NEED this to happen. This is what makes a plot delicious. If we’d had this perfect, lovely, romantic season where the stakes aren’t raised one bit and everything is fixed at the end, we would want for nothing and the gorgeous tension that keeps us waiting and watching would be lost. We wouldn’t feel that drive to create fanfics and fanart, we wouldn’t have the need to speculate or dream, because most of the tension was eased, and you just can’t have that if you want a highly anticipated third season. We’d have nothing huge and concrete to look forward to.

In fact, I was getting really worried once the Ineffable Bureaucracy started happening on screen, because I could see (I thought) past that bend in the road toward the end. I could see how this season might conclude, with big happy confessions of love and hugs and handholding (that’s all I expected, because I only expected the same chaste level of affection with both angelic/demonic couples) and then…then it’d all be over. What more could there be? I mean, there certainly could be more, but THIS is the main thing people waited for. The Happy Confession. The hug. The handholding. Whatever we got. And in my mind, having it now, at the end of season two, just wasn’t adding up – it did not fit. It couldn’t. No, we can’t have this now. It doesn’t work.

I get this peculiar thing that happens when things start getting too “everything is great!” in a story. I get the “someone needs to die” instinct. Instead of pure happiness that things are going great, there’s this feeling of intense discomfort, because I feel the weight of the shoe that’s failing to drop. I need it to drop, or else it throws off my entire standard-Western-narrative-trained brain’s balance. In the build up to The Scene, when things seem to be going swimmingly and heading directly towards the happiest and syrupiest of endings, I had to pause and pace my living room and roll around on the floor to alleviate the sheer build up of stress. Things can’t go this well. They can’t. There hasn’t been enough bad things, this is too sweet, too much. Can’t handle it. This can’t just be pure wish-fulfillment at this point; Good Omens shouldn’t work that way, it never has. We’d be happy in the moment, but then it’ll ultimately be a let down. No more danger. Nothing keeping them apart. No more tension, no more story. It was all too easy.

And then, finally, that shoe dropped. After a season of mainly getting along and being just thrilled with each other, they began to really argue. Things got horrific and serious, and I literally let out a breath of relief. I was able to watch without pausing every two minutes for a breather. Ok. Things weren’t over. This wasn’t the end. We had more to wait for.

And then it went on. The confession started, but in that gorgeously wrong way. And for the first time that season, I was actually feeling the stress of the story. Yes, there was danger throughout this season, but it was always layered with humour and wit. You didn’t get a demon scene without them doing something hilariously stupid. You didn’t get an angel scene without them being delightfully out-of-touch. The stakes were high, but they weren’t allowed to get EXTREMELY high. We never thought there was any question of them getting out of scrapes unscathed, because it was never all serious.

Never…until now. There was zero humour at this point. After 6 episodes of being pleasantly delighted, I was feeling the dread. However, I still thought I knew where it was going.  

See, I thought I had it figured out. If I had any extra money, I would have bet some of it. I knew that, whilst they’d likely have some kind of subtle confession of love and caring, and perhaps a touch – a hug, or a hand-hold (like Gabe and Beez) – I knew we couldn’t expect a kiss. This is a story thirty-three years in the making, and it’s always been in that grey area. They weren’t humans; they didn’t necessarily show affection that way. Besides that, we’ve had so many TV shows that get close, but rarely ones that go all the way to smoochville. OFMD was one of the very first, but it was new. It wasn’t an old, established story from the 90s like this is. It didn’t have decades-old fans waiting with bated breath for canon content. For Good Omens, we heard it time and time again in interviews; it’s a kind of love story. They had this kind of marriage. They cared for each other. They had a bromance. It’s close, but never quite there. So I thought I knew exactly how this would go, and would be thrilled with what we got. 

And then it absolutely didn’t go that way. It went exactly as far as so many hoped. And it went there like a knife to the gut.

And it was perfect.

Goddamn, what a season ending. Despite my lack of appetite and failure to sleep, I could not be happier with what Mr. Gaiman did. I am screaming crying throwing up and I’m thrilled about it.

The middle of a story is typically what drags; it never holds the highest stakes. Lord knows what we’re going to get in season three (knocking on wood), but I can only expect it to get bigger and heavier. And by God and/or Satan, am I prepared, in this deliciously painful purgatory, to wait and see.  

[spicerackofblorbos]

i'm GOD AWFUL at answering my asks unless they're requests, I'm sorry a;sldkfjas;df but to everyone who has sent me hearts, good vibes, and sunflowers, I appreciate and love you all so much!! <3 i'm finally getting around to this one!

i've been ordered by kat to do 5 more so here's my top 10 favorite fics I've written!! These are ALL x reader!

1. Amethyst | Leon Kennedy 2. Unspoken Words | Levi Ackerman - Chapter One: November 3. Sunrise | Levi Ackerman 4. Home | Leon Kennedy 5. For You, I Would | Armin Arlert 6. Can I Go Where You Go? | Levi Ackerman 7. Are You There? | Levi Ackerman 8. Chasing Waterfalls | Toge Inumaki 9. You'll Be Okay | Levi Ackerman 10. What's Mine, Is Yours | Erwin Smith

And here's my answer to tay's ask about my fics!

❥ fic I loved writing the most

this will always be dependent on when you ask me, because right now it will have to be Amethyst. If y'all haven't noticed, my newest love is Leon Kennedy, and writing for him is so much easier than writing for Levi and I think it's because I understand Leon's personality more. He's just so fun to riff off of. Not that Levi wasn't!! He was just harder to put down for me, I guess. ANWAYS. I loved writing for Leon and I'm working on a part two!!

❥ fic others loved that I didn't care for

okay so this might come as a surprise because it's my ultimate comfort fic, but it would have to be Sunrise. tbh, I don't know what loved the most means here but I'll equate it to notes. Sunrise is precious to me because it holds so many of my favorite things. BUT I really feel like I could have done so much better. The plot is there, the scenario and surroundings are perfect. but the WRITING?? I could have done better. don't get me wrong though, I still love it and I am very happy so many people liked it!!

❥ fic I had fun writing

definitely my For You, I Would fic. I don't have very many Armin fics but I enjoyed writing for him a lot because he's just such a shy little bean and so full of wonder and love. I could really see myself wanting to take him out on a date. This was also a request for my friend Tay and it was fun catering her interests within the story and how it works well with Armin!!

❥ fic I'm most proud of

for sure it would have to be Unspoken Words. I'm proud because it was the first time I've written something for myself in a long time. I didn't think I would care as much about fanfic until I fell in love with AoT, now look at me LMAO. UW helped me become a better writer as well as be more confident in areas I thought I lacked. I quite literally used it as a way to be better, and I'll always be proud of it. My first ever full and finished fic, I'll never forget it <3

❥ fic I wish got more recognition

probably Can I Go Where You Go? mainly because I really liked writing the semi plot twist at the end. like if you were caught up with season 4 of AoT, you would know what I was alluding to and it's like a kick in the gut LMAO. but also I thought I did pretty well with the descriptors, not to brag ofc. :3

❥ my happiest/saddest/most comedic fic

I SPENT 30 MINUTES LOOKING FOR THIS. but the saddest will have to be this short drabble about Levi losing you in an expedition and him coming to your old room, reminiscing. I don't know what brought it on but I was like, huh. let's just be SAD.

if you're interested, my fic masterlist can be found here!

finally, thank you so much for the asks @kingkonoha, @youre-ackermine, and @humanitys-strongest-bamf!! I love y'all a lot <3

[vessel-full-of-stories]

Buck is not a tactile person, at least not in the way we think.

I know in fanon and fanfics, many of us (especially me) love to imagine Buck as someone who constantly presses these small touches into the ones he loves. Except, he doesn't.

Don't misunderstand, Buck thrives on physical affection. Some of his happiest moments are when he receives that form of love. Except, when he gives it, it's almost always under a specific condition.

Buck waits for near-explicit consent.

Hear me out:

It's not as if he doesn't touch people, but it's very much a needed-as situation on the job and then rare occasions such as celebrations with the team. And again, it's never those small, mindless touches of someone who just wants to physically feel someone they care for.

Even in the scariest moments, he waits.

And we can infer he accepted her permission because we see Buck this terrified for a loved one the very next season. Except, he doesn't get any request for comfort or form of consent then.

They're both obviously in critical condition. Both need medical attention immediately. Yet, Buck takes the time to hug and comfort Maddie because she asked for it.

He clearly doesn't mind either option. He's overjoyed just to see them alive. And that's the point. For Buck, these interactions aren't about him. Which is why he doesn't actively pursue them. (Not saying he shouldn't. I, personally, think he should.)

This is a perspective I think many authors can take advantage of when writing fanfiction.

I am not saying to stop writing Buck as openly tactile. I'm saying write both. Write either. Write it all. I need more of this when I search my ship.

And in case you didn't know, EDDIE is the one more openly, physically affectionate between the two of them. 100%. But that's a separate post if you want it.

Also, Buck does not hold these standards when it comes to Chris. Also another post.

Bonus :

The only time I could actively remember Buck touching Eddie without consent (when he wasn't saving his life). Season 2x14 "Broken". This wasn't the first time Eddie had been in danger, but it was the first time he was in danger without Buck there. They were ready to run into the house after he didn't respond on the radio. Eddie came out after his "Spiderman" routine, saving a child in the process. Buck couldn't help himself.

(Just gonna mention how the physical distance between these two has only grown after every time Eddie's needed help... Hmm...)

[bylerismyeverything]

So because Pen and Colin had a buildup since season one, when it’s their season they just solve the issues they had from the previous season and then go right in, and suddenly Penelope is asking Colin to kiss her and I think “I’m not ready for them to kiss yet but I can’t handle him saying no” and then Colin agrees and it feels like a fanfic cuz wdym “I wanna experience a kiss so will you-my lifelong crush and good friend-kiss me?” but then they kiss and it just feels so right and so Colin and Pen, and then he realizes he’s in love with her and acts like “yeah Pen she’s such a good acquaintance of the family” when no one asked and he talks to his mom about friendship turning to love and one day he’s sad and wants to stay home and then his mom tells him Pen is about to be engaged cuz Violet Bridgerton knows what she’s doing and he crashed the ball in the middle of her dance to scare the only suitor she had out of marrying her, and then he chases down her carriage, confesses his feelings to her, she doesn’t believe him, he assures her, he’s shocked when she says they’re friends, he’s the happiest person ever when she says she wants to be so much more, they make out, he fingers her, they get to his house, they laugh together like the besties they are after a full on make out session, and then he asks her to marry him out of absolutely nowhere, not giving a shit about what anyone says but going to tell his family even though his sister hates her and he lied to his mom about liking her but he does it anyway because he wants people to know she’s his, and it’s all so them.

I love season 3.

[nottawriter]

Fanfic Writer Questions!

Thanks for the tag, @fazedlight and @thatonebirdwrites

1- How many works do you have on AO3?

I have 16

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

356,960

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Supergirl – Arrowverse/ DC Comics: Primarily Supercorp, secondarily Dansen, Brainia, and J’M’zz, and I have one AgentReign with secondary Supercorp.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

PRIDE and Prejudice – Super gay retelling of Jane Austen’s classic. Every kudos equals $1.00US to a LGBTQIA2S charity I make at the conclusion of Pride month (June) each year (teen)

Tell Me It’s Not Too Late – Post-S4, Lillian believes Supergirl is responsible for Lex’s death. Lena rushes to J’onn’s for game night, to confront Kara on her identity, only to find she’s nowhere to be found (teen)

I Believe in a Thing Called Love – Full alternate Season 6 rewrite (teen)

Wouldn’t It Be Nice – 50 First Dates movie AU (teen)

How Lost We Are – Lena is placed by her Witness Protection team (Maggie, Kelly, and Lucy) in Midvale as a flower shop owner where she meets teacher Kara and coffee/bookshop owner Jess, among others (mature)

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes, I do usually respond, though not always right away. I enjoy chatting about my fics, so don’t hesitate to ask questions, but I don’t give out spoilers though.  

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

When She’s Gone, the Darkness Comes – Oof. It was so sad I had to write a second chapter. I much prefer happy endings (teen)

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

All of them have a happy ending of some kind, or they will once they’re completed. Though there are some with happy endings like Speak Now and Tis the Damn Season. Smut. I’m talking about smut (explicit)

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Yeah, though I’ve been mostly lucky. I don’t know why people leave hate on any fics really. If you don’t like something, close the tab.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes. It started as a small scene here or there when it was a natural progression of the fic, but now I occasionally right full smut fics and pwp like those found here (explicit)

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Kind of, but the characters are all from within the Arrowverse/ DC Comics universes somewhere.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of. I don't understand why someone would do this. Please respect writers.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes. I Believe in a Thing Called Love is also in Spanish Creo en una cosa llamada amor (teen)

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I’m currently working on one with @thatonebirdwrites, though it's not published. It’s a Supercorp fic where Kara is a building inspector and when she goes to inspect Lena’s home, she meets Lena’s daughter to tells her the floor is lava, so naturally Kara has to ensure that issue gets resolved.  

14. What's your all time favorite ship?

Supercorp. But I do love most wlw ships

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I intent to finish all of my active WIPs. I have some WIP ideas that may or may not ever get going, but once I start a fic, I intend to finish it.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I have no idea… I guess easter egg type stuff or like blending canon into storylines. If your a reader and there's something you think is a strength I have, let me know.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Actually writing. Words be hard. And it's hard to find the time.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I do it sometimes, probably not well. I like to include the translation in the fic (unless the characters themselves aren’t supposed to understand until later). But I'm sure the translations aren't fully right as I only use google translate and the Kryptonian dictionary.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Supercorp. I started writing fiction in Dec 2020. Before that it was all scientific research papers for uni.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

I suppose What Has Been Lost (Mature). It was what started this crazy adventure, has been the most challenging piece, and my longest (still ongoing). It truly blends lore and characters from across the Arrowverse and DC Comics into a human world and original storyline.

For Tags, if you'd like to participate: @fyonahmacnally @casualsavant @luthordamnvers @itsalliebitheway @innamorament0

[fountainpenguin]

Sharing some fanfic musings because I had an epiphany.

I've been working on a 'fic with a plot about Mumbo preparing to eat Grian's soul in line with Hermitcraft Season 8 canon (One and a Half Birds). Obviously the story centers around Mumbo and Grian, but there's something about Impulse that just cracks me up.

This is a semi-realistic Minecraft universe where the villagers are more sentient and treated with more respect. Impulse spends the 'fic improving the farm and babysitting villager kids. It makes me laugh.

Obviously I'd never share the 'fic with him, but I hope on some level, Impulse would be amused to know there's a story that portrays his Minecraft persona as a guy who could've chosen to do anything in the fantasy world, and he opted to mend a villager's gloves and fix a fence. He is the happiest character in the story. He is living his best life.

[honestlydarkprincess]

How would you make Buddie happen in S7? Also, how would you break up Eddie and Marisol?

Excellent question! I personally would like to see some more development with their sexualities first, I'd kill to see Eddie's queer journey. So if I was allowed to have the reigns I would make season 7 about developing that and then season 8 would be about getting them together hehe, because if we look at it like it's been a slowburn (which I personally choose to believe it is) then they've been approaching this moment for several seasons now. If it came out of the blue I would be a little like huh what??? I mean I'd be over the moon and I'd love it buuuuuuuut I think they have an opportunity to really deepen it and draw it out and make us suffer!

Now because I live for fanfic, I would do it in my favourite way: increasing bouts of mutual pining, everyone around them is starting to get fed up and considering conspiring to shove them into a closet together (chimney is particularly fond of this idea), maybe there's a misunderstanding or a miscommunication that increases the pining! Either way it all comes together, maybe with an accidental confession or a slip of the tongue, I live for those. OR mayhaps they express their feelings hospital beside if we wanna go the angsty route.

All this to say that I actually have no idea how I would get them together because the options are just too good, I don't know what would make me happiest!

As for how I would break up Marisol and Eddie, I think that Marisol sees the way that Buddie interact and sits Eddie down and is like, my guy you are in love with him and we should probably break up. I wouldn't want them to have an explosive breakup because that's not really my jam.

I am so sorry, if you've made it to the end of this without scrolling, kudos! I am blowing you a kiss!

sleepover weekend!

[jennagrinsoverml]

ML Christmas Fic Recs

Merry Christmas to those who celebrate! 🎄🎁❄ I love a good seasonal fic and we have a lot of them in this fandom, so this is a long list. I'm not going to comment on the fics like I usually do to keep this post from being too long. Just trust me that they're all amazing!

I'll Be Home for Christmas by @thelibraryloser

Adrinette: Fake Dating for Christmas "Reasons"

Mistletoe by @11jj11​

The four times the Love Square found themselves under a mistletoe.

A Cat of Their Own by @sariahsue

Tom and Sabine have learned Ladybug's secret identity, it's obvious their relationship It's also obvious to them that Cat Noir adores their daughter. How deep do those feelings go? And how far are they willing to go to mother the boy underneath the mask?

Santa Baby, Slip a Superhero into a Box for Me by therealjanebingley

There's an akuma with the ability to give everyone their heart's desire for Christmas.

But when your heart's desire is your crush, and your crush has a secret identity…who's going to show up under your tree?

Better Fate than Never by @2manyfandoms2count​

This Christmas, about ten years after their first meeting, and five after Hawkmoth's disappearance, Ladybug and Chat Noir are taking the leap and finally revealing their identities to one another.

Two people, one hotel, one plan to drop the masks.

Seemed straightforward enough. Or so they thought...

The Purr-fect Gift by @gryffindorcls​

Years after the reveal and the start of their relationship, Marinette and Adrien move in together. To her dismay, Adrien has become distant and quiet after the move. Marinette just wants things to return to normal, but Adrien has a surprise for her that will change their lives forever.

Unraveled by @overworkedunderwhelmed​

When her holiday family obligations leave Chat Noir more than willing to pick up the slack, Ladybug comes to a rather startling observation -- one she was shocked to realize she hadn’t picked up on before.

Resolved, Marinette gives her all to make Christmas extra special for her partner.

But even the best laid plans can unravel.

Somebody Waits for You (Kiss Her Once for Me) by @thelibraryloser

Ladynoir: Caught Under the Mistletoe

The Christmas Miraculous by @mommadon​

Adrien's trying to build a new life for himself in New York, but after an unexpected break-up with his girlfriend, he returns home to Paris for some soul-searching. What he finds may surprise him.

A pure, 100% fluff, cheesy Christmas movie style fanfic for your guilty pleasure enjoyment.

baby please (come home) by @lnc2​

It’s the first Christmas after Hawkmoth’s defeat and Adrien is struggling without his lady.

Christmas by Starlight by @deinde-prandium

Worried that Ladybug is working too hard, Chat Noir plans the ultimate Christmas surprise. He's gonna give her the stars. Literally.

(Thing is, he doesn't realize that he's in for a surprise of his own.)

Then how the Reindeer Loved Him by @baneismydragon​

A chance meeting on Christmas eve leads to a moment of magic between Ladybug and Adrien.

Kistletoe by @codenamejd​

Adrien has inadvertently caught Marinette under the mistletoe...

...but Adrien's never heard of mistletoe.

12 Dates of Christmas by @lyramae-archer

When Ladybug notices that her partner, Chat Noir, seems down at Christmas season - the happiest time of year - she takes it into her own hands to make the days memorable and special, all with a Christmas spin. They aren't *dates* - they are just two friends doing Christmas things together because her kitty needs to smile. At least until she discovers who it is under the mask.

Kissing for charity by plikki

Marinette doesn't understand why the idea of Chat kissing someone else is killing her. It's for a good cause! But it's so bad that she's forced to spend her savings to make sure she would be the only one kissing him. For the sick children, of course.

Chat Noir's Christmas Spirit by @jennagrinsoverml​

Chat Noir isn't feeling the Christmas spirit this year.

How could he? Nothing's improved since last year.

But his Lady notices and puts her brilliant mind and kind heart to turning her partner's holiday around.

Since We've No Place to Go (Let it Snow) by @thelibraryloser

Marichat: Snowed In

and what's this? a BONUS trope? there was only ONE BED?

Be not afraid of greatness by @zipadeea​

"Love is blind, and lovers cannot see, The pretty follies that themselves commit." Maybe so, but sometimes, sometimes, all it takes to see is an early morning make-up exam, an irrational lack of sleep, and a pen that's out of ink. Reveal fic!

Chocolate Coins by @inkjackets​

A cold December day, a load of chocolate coins, two teenage superheroes... the perfect recipe for fun!

Smudged to Perfection by @overworkedunderwhelmed​

As pleased as Adrien was to have found an early Christmas gift from one of his friends on his desk at school, he was ecstatic when he realized it possessed a power far stronger than he’d ever imagined.

Zibeline by @chatonne-rousse​

Marinette finally pulls Adrien's name for the class gift exchange. She has a great idea for the perfect Christmas gift, but when Ladybug allows Chat Noir to help, things end up going differently - though not worse - than she had envisioned.

at every table, i'll save you a seat by @ladynoirist

unbeknownst to them, adrien and plagg have the same plan for christmas morning: giving their kitten the best christmas he's ever had

A game of pretend by @emsylcatac

Marinette was certain that Adrien was Chat Noir. She was also certain that he knew her identity. Yet, the both of them were acting like they hadn’t connected the dots and were still oblivious to what was now painfully obvious. She didn’t know if it was a game they were playing at or not, but if so, she had no intention of losing.

Which proved itself to be extremely difficult when Chat Noir suggested on patrol one evening that they go gift-shopping for their lovers together.

Butter by @ao3bronte​

It’s warm in their garden igloo, an Eden of good company and beating hearts cocooned against the December chill and the gently falling snow cascading from the heavens. Chat wishes he could spend the rest of his life like this, laughing and joking with Ladybug over a homemade Christmas dinner made just for the two of them.

Mice to Meet You by @sing-in-me-oh-muse​

Santa and his elves ended up sick from a shortage of sugar cookies because Mrs. Claus had gone on vacation to visit her cousin in Antarctica (and he's too busy to bake for himself and 300 elves).

So the day before Christmas, Santa calls Chat Noir for help.

But Chat can't do it on his own.

He needs help from Multimouse! Well. Several Multimouses.

Resolution by @thelibraryloser

Ladrien: New Year's Eve Resolutions

and also... another Ladrien specific bonus trope which is a surprise and I will give you a hint: it isn't gratuitous blushing

The following fic is amazing and absolutely worth reading, but does feature sexual content, so minors beware.  

Advent Calendar by @ghostlyhamburger

Chat and Ladybug do a different Christmas activity every day

[typewriting101]

have hope.

pairings: levi ackerman x reader

warnings: brief abuse scene & mentions of blood

genre: fanfic romance

word count: 1k+

⟶ summary: you’re the happiest person on base & levi has a secret liking to you. what happens when he finds out your boyfriend is abusing you?

a/n: this one was so hard for me to keep him in character so i hope it’s good anyways HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY

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It was a cold winter this year, but you didn’t mind. In fact, it was your favorite season. There was something about the crisp white of the snow, the scent of the cold air, that could refresh your mentalities and just make you feel reset.

Today was a training day. Every morning at precisely ten o clock, the Levi Squad met outside for combat training to start the day. Lining up in a row with one hand in a fist on your heart, the other behind you, while the Captain gave a rundown was the procedure and today was no different.

Your heart skipped a beat when you saw him.

Levi walked past each and every soldier, giving you a rundown of how the training will work, the goal, and if there were any questions. He looks each one of you in the eye as he speaks and everytime he reaches you, you can't help but give a small smile. He wouldn’t know it meant you thought he was handsome, strong and intelligent. You were the girl who always smiled, who always laughed. It’s one of the many reasons people loved you, you always wore your true colors.

Until recently.

A few months ago, you got in a relationship with another soldier. He was strong, confident and had his eye on you. At first, you thought it was off putting, but then you decided nobody else saw you that way, you might as well go for it and see what happens. So you did.

At first it was great, he’d bring you snacks, always had an eye on you while training, all of it. What you didn’t know until it was too late was how awful he truly was,

Because not everyone wears their heart on your sleeve like you.

You had to start making excuses to Armin. He was the smartest of your group. Every morning you used to wake up early with him and walk the grounds. Sometimes you laughed, vented about loss, and other times it was just your arms linked together taking in the breeze in a comfortable silence.

Now you told him, it was too much because you weren't sleeping well, but in reality you were applying makeup to the bruises on your face as you silently cried. You blinked away the thoughts as the troops yelled “YES SIR!” and began training. Armin, of course, being your partner.

Lunch came much earlier than anticipated and the two of you walked back to the castle, with Armin apologizing for hitting you in the cheek too hard as you laughed. The two of you waited in line and Jean yelled for you both. Armin waved, but you didn’t move.

You saw your boyfriend with an angry face, staring at you. His hand gesture told you to follow him as he left the dining hall to head towards the dorms.

“Oh, I can’t sit today.”

“What?!” exclaimed Jean, “Oh, I have had the best joke. Sweetheart, don’t do this to me. I gotta tell it before Eren comes!” causing Connie to snort out his drink, laughing hysterically.

Armin turned to you, his smile from Connie fading, “Hey,” he whispered, “Are you okay? I feel like I don't see you outside training anymore.” he put a hand on your arm as his eyes analyzed you, in the most comforting way. You felt a head look up and you panicked, not realizing how close you were to the captain's eating table.

“Yes.” You said too fast, “I have just felt tired. So, I'm going to head to my room, thank you, Armin. You're always so kind.” You left with your food as quickly as you came in, Armin watching you leave, along with the captain, a frown on his face.

Your boyfriend was standing outside your dorm room, tapping his foot. As soon as he saw you he grabbed your tray and tossed it, causing everything to spill, “Why did you just-”

“Where the hell were you?” he hissed. He grabbed you and slammed you against the door, his grip on your wrist would have caused you to groan in pain, but then he’d be angrier, so you squeezed your eyes shut. “Oh, so you're not going to even look at me now?” His breath reeked of alcohol, your least favorite thing. “Sounds like you need a lesson on respect.”

Fear dropped into your stomach so fast, you thought you might vomit.

No.

No.

No.

Please don't hit me.

But he doesn't know that word anymore.

You woke up early like normal, but today you knew it was over. You were unhappy, scared, everything you never used to be. You stood up and opened your curtains to let the light in. You looked in the mirror and gasped. In nothing but your big scout t-shirt, your body was absolutely littered with bruises in pinks, blues, and even purples. You crumbled to the floor in tears.

What happened to your strength?

You winced as you got dressed, your clothes covering most of them, and you used your makeup to cover your face, which helped a lot. You knew you looked okay, you just wished you were.

Levi was a Captain, he knew his soldiers well, but today felt odd. He didn't like it. It was breakfast time and you were nowhere to be seen. Yet here was Armin, without you.

As ten o’ clock hit, Levi marched outside and saw every spot was filled which meant you were here. You’d see him and smile, like you always did and things would be fine. except things were not fine. He got to you and stopped. Your eyes were dazed and dark underneath, your legs slightly shook from exhaustion, he didn't even think you realized he was in front of you.

“Y/n?”

Nothing.

“Y/N?” he said louder, to cover up his worry, causing everyone's heads to turn.

You snapped out of it and jumped at your name being yelled. He grabbed you by the shoulders to steady you, “Y/n, It's okay, everything is fine. Okay?” He said softly, realizing his soldier voice was the opposite of what you needed.

“Yes.” Your face turns red. “Sorry, Captain.”

He looked at you and blinked, “You're sitting out today.”

You paled, “What?”

“Rest of you, show’s over. Today is ODM gear training. Erwin’s waiting for you at the site. So don't just stand here, you're dismissed.” 

The familiar “Sir!” a salute echoed and everyone ran towards the trees.

Levi put his hands on the sides of your arms causing you to yelp in pain. “Jesus, what the hell?”

Your eyes widened as Levi froze, his hands ghosting where he touched you. “I’m fine, I just fell last night during combat training. So I'm a bit sore.”

A silence floats between you both and you shift under his icy gaze, “Tell me the truth,”

“What?”

“Y/n. I'm the Captain of this squad. I know when things are off and right now…it's you. Everyday you smile and nod at me, and not only did that not happen, you can barely stand up on your own today. You are zoned out and wincing when you're normally my best soldier.” he brings his voice down, “You can tell me, y/n.”

His eyes looked into yours, digging for an answer. Surprisingly, he looked a little worried, which is very unusual for him. 

You felt your eyes prick up with tears and Levi’s eyes widened. Then, as you were about to confess, you saw him. He was watching you, and he was angry. Levi saw your eyes flicker and went to turn his head but you panicked. “Don’t move!”

Levi froze again, his eyes still on you, “What the hell is this?” This time you hear the slight worry break through his usual monotone.

You saw your boyfriend leave and relaxed. “Nothing, I'm sorry sir. I'll do better.” You were slowly backing away from him, but he was moving forward.

“No… you were going to say something. What was it?”

“Nothing!” You snapped, Levi stopped walking and with a turn you left, mumbling about sitting out like he said.

Levi had no clue what to do and he always did. The nicest person he has had yet to know was different. Something was happening to you. He felt his heart hit his stomach, something is happening to you and he hasn’t stopped it.

He decided he couldn't take this any longer and followed you. He was high up in the military for a reason, you didn't catch on for a second. He lost you from your quick speed for a moment but heard your shrill whispers and his body filled with that dread he was new to experiencing.

“I didn’t tell the Captain anything, I didn't. I didn’t!”

 Levi realized you were now hysterically sobbing and was running at top speed to your cry that was echoing through the base. Suddenly, you screamed louder and the captain realized nothing was more frightening to him than not finding you. He reached an old door and kicked it open so hard his foot went through it and it slammed off the hinges.

The happiest person on base, the reason he, along with so many others, were able to get up in the morning, was curled up in a pile on the floor, blood trickling from your head. He took one look at the satisfied man towering above you and did what any sane captain would do,

He beat him until he was in a much worse state than you were, which didn't take long at all.

He was quick to check your pulse, which was fine, and he scooped you up and ran with you to Hange’s office.

“Captain Levi?” your voice was breathless, you could only just see him.

“It’s okay, y/n. It’s fine, I have you now.” His voice was soft, his running smooth. You curled into him and smelled something like teakwood, clean shampoo, and rainwater. “Don't sleep just yet, let Hange and I fix you first.”

“Okay.” was all you could say, and against his wishes, you fell into a sleep with his voice yelling your name.

You woke up to Levi sitting on a couch across the room, his hands stained with your blood as he sat spread out, arms crossed talking to Hange. You looked around and saw you weren't in a hospital bed, you were in Levi’s. You wore what was probably his shirt, and felt a bandage over your head, the pressure adding onto your stinging headache. She nodded and left, when he turned to look at you he jumped up and walked over to you. 

“I told you not to sleep, cadet.”

You smiled, painfully, “I'm sorry.”

He sighed, eyebrows furrowing as he rubbed them together with one hand, “So, are we going to discuss what I walked in on?”

Your eyes quickly left him and shifted to anything in the room. He sat on the edge of his very large bed, the two of you only taking up the left side. “He’s with Erwin, he’s being discharged. He can’t hurt you. Not anymore… I beat him to shit, That's what he looks like now. Shit.”

You laughed at his usual demeanor surfacing, which broke you into a cough. But you nodded, thanked him, and told him your story.

“Jesus.” Levi said darkly, as you finished.

“I’m sorry-”

“Never say that again.”

You were taken aback, used to apologizing. “Y/n,” he shifted slightly away from you. “I think… I think you've been apologizing too much behind closed doors. So, please don't feel like you have to apologize to me. If you should know anything, It's that you're safe in this room and that you're safe with me.”

Emotions filled your body in a way you didn’t understand, so you nodded, words failing you. He stood up and stared at you, then leaned down to you, his elbows on the bed. You froze thinking he was going to kiss you, but he didn’t. “Get some sleep. You’ll have a headache for a few days.” he whispered in your ear.

You nodded again and felt his face against yours, causing you to grow hot. You tried to sit up but Levi moved and pushed you down again. “Stay down. That’s an order. I want you to relax.”

He watched you contemplate him but gave in, very tired. “Are you leaving?” you asked, nervously.

He scoffed, “Tch. The last thing you need to be is alone right now. I have paperwork to do anyway. We learned a lot on the 57th Exterior Scouting Mission.” When Levi sat at his desk and turned to you, he saw you were asleep, but he saw a small smile gracing your face. His whole body relaxed. You were going to be okay, that's all he ever wanted.

He wanted to slap himself, realizing he now has emotions towards his best soldier. He didn't do romantic feelings. But, maybe just this once he could change his mind

and have hope.

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a/n: PLEASE LET ME KNOW HOW I WROTE HIM. i’m nervous hahaha

🏷️: @stellar-lunee @rwandabailey @maplemiyuki @canthebest1 @ardenous @majoshionna (i tried to tag everyone but some it wasn’t letting me?? help)

[anmagirl]

Hazbin Hotel prompts/ ideas

With season 1 over my mind is going haywire with new fanfic ideas, so I thought I share some and maybe write some when I have time.

Valentine's Day special for Charlie x Vaggie, Angel x Husk, or Cherri and Sir Pentious.

Sir Pentious tries to give Cherri chocolate for valentines Day but constantly fails

A day with Nifty and what she does at the hotel

date night for Charlie and Vaggie

Angel tries to ask out Husk without being pervy

a haunted house theme story where the characters start disappearing

Angel has to babysit the egg bois

on a group outing, they all lose sight of Nifty who runs off

Angel gets captured and is forced to stay at the studio. (takes place after episode 4)

what happens when one of the characters gets sick

what happens when it's one of the character's birthday/deathday.

daddy daughter day with Lucifer and Charlie and maybe Alaster

flashback stories for how the characters died or what their happiest memory was in life

sinner comes to the hotel but causes trouble and eventually gets kicked out

That is it for now.

[greypetrel]

Fanfic Writer Questions

Tagged by @melisusthewee, and at least another person. I'm sorry if I ignored the tag, I was away and it's a busy period, let me know ;_;

Tagging forward: @ndostairlyrium @shivunin @inquisimer and YOU who are reading and would like to do it!

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 12, right now.

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 497,183 ... I'm chatty.

3. What fandoms do you write for? Dragon Age, and a crossover with LOTR/The Silmarillion.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Home Was Never on the Ground (long fic, concluded, it's anthological and mainly me filling blanks in DAI as inspiration stroke)

She of Many Names (ongoing, a LOTR/Dragon Age crossover. A follower on Instagram asked me if Aisling was Sauron, the idea made me laugh so much that my mind took fire.)

Saturday Prompts (a collection of prompts I posted here. I never uploaded every one of them, oops)

Death and All of Its Friends (ongoing, a DA2 collection)

The Night Before First Day (Two chapters, concluded. One it's in rhyme and illustrated. Aisling taught her daughter that the Dreadwolf is Santa out of spite. Solas tries to disapprove.)

5. Do you respond to comments? Yes, always!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I do love angst, but I don't like angsty endings all that much ahahahahah. I think the one that gets closer, in a bitter-sweet way, is One for the Road. Call me a sucker for rare-pairs, this was also prompted here and my brain took fire (LavellanxFenris)

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? The Night Before First Day. Listen I'm not a Christmas person, I turn into a seasonal depressed Grinch at Christmas, living in a catholic country doesn't help, and that is my way of giving myself some joy.

8. Do you get hate on fics? Not that I know of.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Not any that I publish.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? Yes I do. She of Many Names is a Dragon Age and LOTR crossover. I love it dearly, I'm slow to update it because I have the greatest love for Tolkien (with all his flaws, but my brain rewired when I saw the first movie, and the book has been my entire personality for two years. I wouldn't be the same person without it) and I do care of rendering it as I want.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? ... Not that I know of? I hope not, ahahahah :"D

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? If you consider that English is not my first language, all my fics are translated? xD Other than that, no.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? No, but I'd love to.

14. What's your all time favorite ship? EowynxFaramir, hands down. Out of pure lenght. Maybe LeiaxHan Solo (my parents are both nerds, I think my mom made me watch Star Wars the first time... I don't remember, the vhs were always around in the house. I was very, very little.)(we don't talk about the sequel trilogy.)

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I tried to write a third chapter for the aforementioned One for the Road... But it ends up in a love triangle and I don't like love triangles that aren't a poly relationship. So, it's sitting in my folder and I'll never finish it. I was considering ditching the second chapter and rewrite it as a "Aisling as a companion in DA2" fic... But MEH.

16. What are your writing strengths? I think dialogue. I am trained as a comic artist, which means that the writing parts that get polished are dialogue. I have much more experience with that. ... I am also terrible at judging my own work in a positive way, tho, so you tell me.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? English not being my first language and leading to mis-spellings. Other than that... I started writing fanfiction after YEARS of not writing anything in prose that wasn't screenplays for comics (which follows different rules). Since I stopped because of being hurt by it, I went on to it by not planning stuff.

I'm rusty with prose, and my retelling -the first thing I tackled- clearly had little planning ahead.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? It's a no, for me, unless you specifically wants your audience not to understand what's being said and create a sense of isolation and of not knowing what's going on. A sentence here and there with a translation is fine. But if it's something long... You want the reader to understand well. Italicized text it is.

19. First fandom you wrote for? I wouldn't call it a fandom, but: Greek Mythology. I drew a parody comic of the Iliad in my first high school year, alongside friends. It had been so fun. I also wrote, still in high school, something heavily inspired by Eragon, which only my friends had the pleasure of reading. (I'm only saying it involved my now most hated trope: THE SECRET TWIN.)

20. Favorite fic you've written? The next one.

I'm very invested in Ashes and Sparks, aka the Dreadwolf AU. I'm putting ideas in it and going fully canon divergent and writing it as I would like Inquisition to have gone. No Corypheus, more crazy tevinters, and the focus ON FUCKING TIME TRAVEL.

In a modern setting because yes.

It's also tackling something I absolutely hate in fiction when it's done wrongly, which is time travel, and I'm sweating and hoping I'll do it with logic. It's something niche and not so focused on a single ship, so probably it'll interest only me, but I'm happily writing and trying to contain myself from posting chapters of more than 10k.

Blank Form Under the Cut

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

3. What fandoms do you write for?

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

5. Do you respond to comments?

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

8. Do you get hate on fics?

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

14. What's your all time favorite ship?

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

16. What are your writing strengths?

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

19. First fandom you wrote for?

20. Favorite fic you've written?

[cocrante]

I Start Over With You

[SOLANGELO FANFIC]

summary: After the great battle against the forces of Gaea, Camp Half-Blood and Camp Jupiter had formed a long-lasting alliance. Everything had gone well, and everyone was ready to start anew. This included Nico, who, after confessing his feelings to Percy, was prepared to open a new chapter in his life—perhaps the happiest one the Fates had ever written.

note: the chapters will be updated every Wednesday. If you want to read upcoming chapters of the fanfiction in advance, I invite you to follow me on Patreon. Subscribing is not necessary, these chapters will be added for free on the platform on Mondays and Fridays. Following me there is just a kind and free gesture to support my work c:

Reblogs are highly appreciated c:

[CHAPTER 20]

THERE WASN'T MUCH TO DO THAT MORNING AT THE CAMP. MANY ACTIVITIES WERE CLOSED FOR THE WINTER SEASON. Jason suggested to Nico that they do something indoors to pass the time. Nico, shrugged, agreeing to whatever his friend had in mind. Jason then took him to do some manual work, which was quite popular among demigods in December.

"You could give him a vase" Jason suggested ironically as they entered the pottery workshop. "Not a chance" Nico replied, perhaps too seriously, following him into the workshop.

The interior smelled of wood and clay. As soon as the two boys stepped inside, they were embraced by the warmth of the fire. It wasn't by chance that this activity was so popular among campers in the winter. The two boys took a table for two, jokingly challenging each other to see who could do the worse job. Neither of them was very skilled in handicrafts; they preferred to leave those things to someone more talented and patient, but at the moment, it was a good excuse to spend time indoors and stay warm.

So they began to shape the clay, molding it as best they could. Most of the time—whatever they were making—ended up either too crooked or too lopsided, requiring them to start over from scratch.

Jason sighed several times; the vase he was making kept collapsing in on itself. "You're getting it too wet" Nico told him, who instead seemed to find the activity more enjoyable than expected. It was easier to push away anxiety when one's hands were busy.

"Do you think so?" he raised an eyebrow, thinking he had used the right amount of water. The boy beside him nodded, giving him the rest of his clay that he no longer needed.

At the end of the day, Jason won that bet, finding his own work all crumbled. Ceramics just weren't his thing. Nico's vase, on the other hand, turned out well.

"Are you going to paint something?" Jason asked, propping his elbow on the table to hold his head with one hand. Nico pursed his lips, staring at the vase that still needed to be fired. He wasn't much of a painter, but if he could, he would have liked to depict the danse macabre on it, even though it had little to do with the Greeks.

"I'll probably leave it as it is" he said. It wasn't worth voicing his thoughts.

In the distance, the conch shell sounded, signaling that time had really flown by that morning. They cleaned the dry clay off their hands, taking off the clay-stained aprons and patches of color. Along with the other demigods who had locked themselves in there, they headed towards the dining hall, and suddenly Nico's heart began to pound hard in his chest: Will's arrival at the camp was getting closer and closer.

It was difficult for him to eat lunch. He kept staring at the entrance of the camp, impatiently waiting for his arrival.

"You're making me anxious too, please relax" Jason said, putting his fork down. All the panic his friend was feeling was somehow transferring to him.

"What if I'm doing something stupid?" he asked more to himself than to the son of Jupiter. All that energy he had, those pep talks he had with himself in front of the mirror, suddenly all faded away. He wasn't so sure anymore if he could do it, if he could talk to him about his feelings; in reality, it was something he never did well. "You're just nervous" Jason told him, taking a sip from his chalice. "You'll see, once you're alone wirh him, it'll be fine"

Nico just sighed, looking at the grilled food on his plate: he really wanted to believe Jason's words, but it was so difficult to push away all those negative thoughts and fears that arose, and with every passing minute, it was getting worse.

After lunch, Nico managed to eat something, or rather he forced himself to. He said goodbye to Jason, who went to the Greek class; he had become good at translations, but the words were still difficult for him to pronounce. He often confused Greek terms with Latin ones.

Nico instead went to the entrance of the camp; there was no point pretending to do something while waiting for his arrival. He sat down on a cut log, propping his elbow on his knee to rest his cheek on his hand. Time suddenly seemed to slow down; the hours never passed, the minutes remained the same, and the knot in his stomach grew stronger. Then, at the end of the valley, a door closed, and the engine of a car started again. His heart literally leaped into his throat.

It was hard to see who it was because of a light mist, but as the demigod got closer, Nico slowly started to breathe again, relaxing his previously tense shoulders. He had forgotten that Percy also spent the winter at the camp with Annabeth—she had driven there with him. "Hey Nico!" Percy greeted, approaching his friend and leaving the suitcases with Annabeth. "What are you doing here all alone?" he asked, and before Nico could answer, he continued. "Come with us! You have to tell us a lot about New Rome" he dragged him away from the camp entrance. "You could have sent me a message once in a while" Percy muttered ironically. Nico had missed that suffocating guy.

"I had better things to do" he replied, leaving Percy taken aback.

"Like what?" Percy asked curiously. Annabeth also approached, curious about the conversation.

Nico averted his gaze from Percy's, his cheeks turning a little red. "Oooh!" the two exclaimed in unison, noticing his embarrassed face. "And what did you talk about?" Annabeth asked.

"Nothing much" he briefly recounted the conversations they had had over those months, glossing over some small details.

"So he still doesn't know?" Annabeth concluded. Her boyfriend hadn't been able to keep the secret for long, but Nico no longer cared about that.

"No" he replied. "But he should be arriving at the camp today, so—" he didn't finish the sentence, it was obvious what he was about to say.

Together they went to the pavilion, there were many things they needed to catch up on, and then they had all the time to unpack their bags. Both Percy and Annabeth bombarded him with questions about New Rome, particularly about how he was doing there and if the people were friendly. They didn't want to end up with unfriendly neighbors. So Nico explained the situation that had arisen: it wasn't easy to get used to the changes, it would take years before everything was truly accepted. "Some tolerate it, I think, they understood what they were going against and preferred to abandon their ideals rather than end up in chaos" he explained. "Others are still sulking and would rather barricade themselves inside their walls than let their secrets out" he told them everything Reyna and Frank had explained to him in his first month in the new city. "So should we not expect a warm welcome?" Annabeth deduced. Nico simply shrugged. "Maybe not" he sighed, nervously glancing at the camp gate. He would arrive any moment now.

Without beating around the bush, the son of Hades got up, saying he was going to the bay. Percy gave him a thumbs up, wishing him all the best. Annabeth also gave him some courage, which was what he needed most at the moment.

He left the pavilion behind, heading towards the bay. At first, he hadn't thought about it, but suddenly he remembered that it had been the site of their first friends' outing, where Will had asked him to meet him that afternoon when he had gone to practice archery. He couldn't believe so much time had passed since then, it seemed like just a few weeks ago.

He sat down on a rock, staring at the waves and turning his back to everything else. He liked the sound of the sea, the surf breaking on the beach. It was somehow relaxing, as if the waves were carrying away his darkest thoughts.

The sun slowly descended, on the verge of being swallowed by the horizon. The bright, rosy colors of the sky turned purple, blending with the warm orange of the sun.

Behind him, he heard the sound of footsteps, mingled with the clinking of stones being moved. It was funny, but he was certain that even among a thousand steps, he would be able to recognize his. He turned towards that figure bathed in the late afternoon sun, which was now getting closer and closer. Nico stood up, his hands cold, and his heart in his chest seemed like it could burst at any moment.

"Percy told me I'd find you here" he said, nervously lowering his gaze. Will had probably noticed the place they were in.

"He told you right" replied the son of Hades, nervously playing with the ring he had on his finger. It was a gesture that Will had often seen him do when they were together. "I have to tell you something" added the son of Hades, staring into the blue of his eyes, which, as the sun set, took on various intense shades.

"Me too" the son of Apollo swallowed, approaching Nico.

It felt strange to Nico to see him in a burgundy hoodie and jeans instead of the usual orange camp outfit.

"Go first" Nico's heart started pounding harder as he approached Will, who was now only about thirty centimeters away.

"No, you" Will smiled awkwardly, encouraging him with a hand gesture to speak first.

"Okay, fine" he muttered, looking down at the ring he still hadn't stopped fidgeting with. "It's something important" he raised his gaze again as Piper had told him to do.

"Alright" the son of Apollo tried to hold back a laugh, it was funny to see him so nervous.

"Okay" he replied, taking some time to organize his thoughts. "I wanted to tell you that the weeks we spent together at the camp were the best of my life. I was scared at first to spend time together, afraid you might get tired of me like most people do" instinctively, he pursed his lips in a small grimace. "I'm not very good with these things, with feelings, words, living people in general— but I wanted to tell you that for me, the little time we spent together laughing and talking meant a lot. And that time you were right when you told me there's always time to make new and even better memories, you proved it to me every day we spent together. Both at the camp and through Iris messages" he looked into his eyes, and a delicate smile was slowly forming. "What I—what I mean is that I would like to build more memories... with you, Will" his cheeks flushed a bit.

Will curled his lips slightly, as if considering those words, stepping closer to Nico. A veil of silence fell between them; neither spoke anymore.

"So, Solace, did you get it, right?" Nico interrupted that silence, not knowing how else to say it.

The son of Apollo looked into those intense black eyes, sure that he understood. He smiled timidly, lowering his gaze to his own white fingers that never stopped playing with that silver skull-shaped ring. He nodded, bringing his attention back to Nico's tense face, which seemed impatient to hear his response. "I would like to build new memories with you too" he replied, smiling.

"Really?" Nico whispered, letting out a breath.

"Really" Will nodded, getting closer.

Once again, neither of them spoke, they let a silence fall interrupted only by the lapping of the waves breaking on the shore. Meanwhile, the sun was slowly setting to make way for the night. Nico bit his lip, he had never thought about what would come next, it couldn't end like this, perhaps even Will expected something and was now waiting for it.

"Well then—" Nico said quickly, interrupting that silence. "If you agree I'd like to start with this kind of memory" he took another step forward, placing a hand on Will's warm cheek, leaning towards his face to imprint his first kiss on his lips. Neither of them actually expected it; it was such a spontaneous gesture. That, and they both believed, would be the best memory. December finally acquired a different meaning for Nico and also for Will.

That kiss lasted only a few seconds, which for them seemed to last an eternity. They stayed staring into each other's eyes for a while, both with a smile on their lips and hearts beating fast.

Nico had never noticed it before, but Will smelled like sunscreen and wildflowers. The son of Apollo was right, he truly brought summer into the darkest and coldest day of the year.

[CONTENTS]

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