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proxima-writes · 11 months

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the old college try

pairing: frat dad!joel miller x college student!female reader

rating: explicit (18+ MDNI)

word count: 5.1k

summary:

Family Weekend, or DILF Day as you and your friends like to refer to it, is when the University of Texas encourages the parents and families of its student body to visit the school and participate in activities that the Division of Student Affairs has organized. The fraternities and sororities have their own schedule that includes not-so-sanctioned house parties on frat row following the game. It’s your senior year and your last DILF Day so you’re hoping to go out with a bang. Literally. Enter Joel Miller, handsome single dad visiting his son at the Theta Lambda Upsilon fraternity house.

dear reader:

this is an extremely self-indulgent fic that i just had to write, so i hope you enjoy it! if you do, please consider leaving a comment or reblogging <3

content warnings:

explicit sexual content (18+ minors do not interact), alternate universe - no outbreak/no sarah, age difference (42M and 23F), dub con - sex under the influence of alcohol, no use of y/n, frat party stereotypes, keg stands and beer pong, semi-public sex (frat bathroom), mild daddy kink (not during sex), p in v, oral sex (f receiving), dirty talk, cheesy dad jokes, the university of texas as a plot device. please let me know if any are missing!

You turn over in your bed with a deep groan, burying your face into your pillow. You reach your arm out from under the covers to grab your phone from the nightstand, smacking your hand around the wood surface until you find it and can bring it under the covers with you. Turning over, you tap the screen and squint at the series of unread text messages.

Ashley: Get up bitch!

Ashley: It’s time to get ready!

Ashley: We’re going to be late if you don’t get up

Ashley: Don’t make me break into your apartment

Ashley: You know I can

You sit up quickly, shoving the blankets off of you and rushing to the front door, flipping the lock and pulling it open. Your best friend is across the threshold, knelt down on the ground with two bobby pins held up and her eyes wide in surprise.

“Aw man,” she laments, standing and brushing off her knees. “I wanted to test my skills.”

“I’m not paying to replace the lock,” you chastise, stepping back to let her in. “Sorry, overslept.”

“Figured. I’ll get your coffee started,” she replies, heading for your kitchen while you head back to your bedroom to start your morning routine. “Guess which frat is hosting the tailgate today?”

“Which one?” You shout from the bathroom as you run through your skincare routine.

“Theta Lambda Upsilon,” Ashley shouts back. The scent of brewing coffee paired with this excellent news has you perking up immediately.

Your friend steps into your room with two mugs in her hands, passing one to you as you exit the bathroom and sit at your cluttered vanity, pushing aside products to make room to set your mug down. Ashley sits on your bed, folding her legs beneath her.

“The hottest frat hosting the tailgate and after party means we’ll get to see the hottest dads this weekend,” she says, shimmying her shoulders excitedly. “It’s simple genetics.”

“You dropped genetics. Remember? You couldn’t handle an 8 am class,” you say as you apply mascara.

“I went to enough classes to know how a Punnett square works.”

You laugh, finishing your makeup between long sips of coffee. “It’s amazing you couldn’t tough it out through an early semester but give you an afternoon game and you’re trying to break into my apartment at the crack of dawn.”

“It’s DILF Day, baby. It’s like waking up on Christmas morning.”

As an out-of-state student, your parents have always skipped Family Weekend in exchange for buying your plane tickets back home for Thanksgiving and Christmas break, which leaves you with plenty of opportunity to ogle the hot dads that descend upon campus on this glorious weekend. You’ve never had the guts to actually pursue anything with anyone, but it’s your senior year and your last DILF Day so you’re hoping to go out with a bang.

Literally.

“What are you going to wear?” Ashley asks.

“Shorts and that new tank top I got,” you reply, finishing your makeup with a pop of your lips after applying gloss. “And boots. Obviously.”

“Obviously,” Ashley nods as you rifle through your closet for the outfit in question - denim cutoffs and orange Texas Longhorn tank top that hugs your curves and shows off the perfect amount of cleavage. Finishing the look with your worn brown cowgirl boots, you spin for your friend who gives you a thumbs up. “Sexy. I reckon’ this year you’ll catch yourself a DILF.”

You roll your eyes. “Maybe. We’ll see.”

Joel’s arm hangs out the truck’s open window, fingers tapping against the hot metal as he drives down the highway towards the Austin campus of the University of Texas. It’s Family Weekend and his son, Sean, started his sophomore semester at UT a few weeks prior and now lives in the Theta Lambda Upsilon fraternity house on campus after proving to Joel that he would take his classes seriously by doing well his freshman year. Joel’s always been close with his son as a single dad and the fact that Sean asked him to Family Weekend feels like a testament to that bond.

The campus is already bustling with the game day crowd, trucks parked in grassy areas along the road with their tailgates down, people setting up tents and tables and coolers. Joel drives slowly down the street until he’s turning down a side road and parking down the hidden drive his son had given him instructions to find. He hops from the truck, sneakers hitting the hot pavement and the sun already beating down on his arms as he makes his way towards the TLU house a couple blocks away.

There’s a huge crowd of students and parents in shades of burnt orange and white on the front lawn of the two story fraternity house, red solo cups or cans of beer in hand. Joel looks around until he hears a familiar voice calling out, “Dad!”

Sean emerges from the crowd dressed in a white polo shirt with an orange Longhorn logo on the chest tucked into khaki pants, his curly brown hair slicked back with gel. Joel smiles, hugging his son and patting him on the back in greeting.

“Been ages since I saw you, kid. Have you gotten taller?” Joel asks.

Sean rolls his eyes. “You saw me last weekend!”

A voice calls out Sean’s name and the younger man throws an arm around Joel’s shoulders, dragging him along into the packed fraternity house. The scene inside is not unlike all the ones he’s seen in movies and TV shows - flags stuck to the walls as decor, a mysteriously sticky floor, and kitchen countertops filled with booze. Sean stops and grabs a red plastic cup, handing it to Joel.

“Pick your poison,” Sean instructs, grabbing his own cup. Joel raises an eyebrow at him.

“Last I checked, you weren’t twenty-one,” he chastises, earning him another eye roll.

“Like you didn’t know Uncle Tommy was buying me beer when I was a senior.”

“He what?” Joel asks, though the question is lost in the noise as Sean leads him to an impressive back deck hosting a beer pong table and two kegs nestled in plastic trash cans and surrounded by ice.

Sean slips into the crowd surrounding the kegs, taking Joel’s cup from his hands, pumping the tap and filling each cup with ice cold beer, handing one to Joel.

“Go Longhorns,” Sean says, tapping his cup to Joel’s and chugging the contents. Joel watches his twenty-year-old son with wide eyes and a torn conscience.

“This is what I’m payin’ tuition for, huh?” He teases, taking a single sip of the cheap beer. A cheer erupts from behind him and he turns to look at what’s causing so much excitement.

You and a friend are at one end of a plastic folding table, glaring daggers at two boys at the other end, a single solo cup set on the table in front of you. You have a white ping pong ball held delicately between two fingers, your other hand propped on your hip as you squint one eye shut to take your aim for the cup that sits in front of the boys. You let the ball fly and it sinks into the cup, another cheer going through the small crowd gathered around you as you jump up and down excitedly.

Sean approaches the boys, slapping one of them on the shoulder. One of them shouts, “Redemption shot!”

“Oh, please! You can’t aim for shit, Chad!” You shout back.

“Celebrity shot, then!” He suggests. The boy, Chad, reaches out to pull an older man to his side. “Dad edition!”

Your eyes scan the crowd, landing on Joel. You wave him over, the older man glancing around briefly before pointing to himself to confirm. You nod, smile bright as he approaches.

“I need a daddy for this celebrity shot, you wanna do the honors?” You ask sweetly. Joel swallows nervously, face heating at the suggestive tone and look you’re giving him.

“Come on, dad!” Sean calls out. “Show ‘em what a Miller man can do!”

“Yeah,” you chime in. “Show me what a Miller man can do.”

“Alright, fine,” Joel acquiesces, moving to stand beside you. You slip a ping pong ball into his hand, standing so close beside him that your bare arm brushes his as you both watch Chad’s dad take aim for the single cup.

The ball soars through the air, hitting the rim of the cup and bouncing off onto the table, rolling to the ground as the men groan. He feels you place a hand on his shoulder, your lips close to his ear as you whisper, “Come on, Mr. Miller. You’re my only hope.”

It doesn’t escape Joel’s notice that you keep your hand on his shoulder as he takes aim and throws the ball across the table, sinking it into the cup. You’re throwing your arms around his shoulders in celebration as the people around you shout excitedly. On instinct, Joel’s arms wrap around your waist, holding you close for a brief moment before coming to his senses and taking a step back.

“Thanks,” you say, looking up at him through your lashes. “I’m going to go inside for a drink. You want anything? I’ve got a stash of IPAs in a friend’s fridge upstairs if you want something better than Miller Lite. Consider it a thank you for winning me bragging rights over Chad.”

Joel should say no. He shouldn’t be taking up drink offers from someone half his age, but you’re giving him another devastating smile that has his resolve folding faster than a lawn chair in a hurricane.

“Sure.”

The hottest man you’ve ever seen is currently following you upstairs to your friend Craig’s room for a beer. He’s tall and tan with sweet brown eyes and dark hair that looks like it would be a dream to run your fingers through. His broad chest and toned biceps press deliciously at the confines of the white UT Longhorns shirt he’s wearing. When he stepped up beside you to throw your celebrity shot at the beer pong table downstairs, you’d noted that his left hand featured no wedding band or a tan line of one left behind.

You reach the second floor and head for the last door on the right, marked with a PRESIDENT plaque. You reach into the pocket for the key Craig had given you earlier and let yourself inside, heading for the mini fridge in the corner and grabbing two Yellow Rose IPA cans.

“So,” you say, handing the man one of the drinks. “You got a name, or should I keep calling you Mr. Miller?”

“It’s Joel,” he says, taking a long sip of the beer. You watch the muscles of his throat work, longing to press your lips against the tan skin.

You tell him your name, holding a hand out to him for a handshake. His grip is tight, sturdy, and for a brief moment you think about how his sure, thick fingers would feel deep inside of you. He looks around the room curiously as he pulls his hand back.

“Craig and I have been friends since freshman year,” you explain. “I helped him pass calculus, he lets me keep my beer out of the grubby hands of his frat brothers.”

“Calculus, huh?” He asks, taking another sip. “Must mean you’re pretty smart.”

“Just a basic engineering prerequisite,” you joke.

“Engineering? That’s impressive.”

You take a seat on Craig’s bed, crossing one leg over the other. Joel’s eyes track the movement and you smile, giddy at the attention. “What do you do, Mr. Miller?”

“Thought you were gonna call me Joel?”

“Mm, I can think of a few things to call you.”

Joel nearly spits his mouthful of beer out, choking on the bitter drink. You rush towards him, patting him on the back as he coughs. After a moment of fighting for breath, the man seems to realize how close you are, his gaze flicking between your eyes and your lips, trailing down to your chest.

You lean in a little closer, pressing yourself to him and you think this might be it, Joel Miller might be the DILF of your dreams as he leans into you as well.

But the doorknob rattles and the door swings open, Joel jumping back in surprise as both of you turn to look at the doorway. Craig leans against the frame, an eyebrow raised and a knowing smirk on his lips. You roll your eyes.

“Hey,” he says, looking between you and Joel. “Ashley’s lookin’ for you downstairs. We’re headin’ to the stadium now.”

“I better find Sean, then,” Joel says. Craig’s eyes light up.

“You’re Miller’s dad? Hey, man, nice to finally meet you. I’m Craig, TLU president.” The men shake hands, patting each other on the back. “Sean’s a good kid, we’re happy to have him.”

“Good to hear,” Joel replies.

“Well, guess I’ll go find Ashley.” You place a hand on Joel’s shoulder. “It was nice to meet you, Mr. Miller. Maybe I’ll see you later?” You let your hand trail down the man’s bicep as you leave and you watch his throat work around a nervous swallow.

“Yeah, sure,” he says. “See you later.”

The Longhorns pull off an impressive win, a 49-0 blowout against Oklahoma that has the entire campus celebrating with abandon. If Joel thought the TLU house was packed for the tailgate, that crowd was nothing compared to the after game party. More alcohol, more people, and more noise is packed into the house. Joel sticks close to Sean, meeting more of his frat brothers and their parents with shouted introductions.

When the stale air inside the house gets too overwhelming, Sean leads him to the deck. More kegs have appeared and his son bumps him with his shoulder, nodding towards where a few people are gathered around one, a man hoisted upside down by two people gripping his legs as he chugs directly from the keg tap. He spits the valve out as the crowd shouts a chorus of, “Twenty!”

“I bet you could do better,” Sean says. Joel raises an eyebrow at him.

“I know what you’re doin’, kid, and it ain’t gonna work,” Joel replies. Sean puts his hands up.

“I’m not doin’ anythin’. But if you’re too scared, you can tell me.”

“I’m not scared.”

“Hey, my dad’s got next!” Sean shouts, dragging Joel through the crowd with an arm around his shoulders. Joel tries to argue but a familiar face in the crowd has the words dying on his tongue. You wiggle your fingers at him in a wave and suddenly he has the motivation to execute the most impressive keg stand of his life.

Joel grabs the cold handles of the keg, Sean and one of his fraternity brothers lifting him into the air so that he’s suspended upside down over the barrel of beer. People begin counting, shouting numbers as he attempts to focus on the beer flooding his mouth and drinking it down steadily. It’s been a long time since he’s done one of these, probably before Sean was even born, but if there’s one thing Joel has never been, it's a quitter.

After what feels like forever he spits the valve out with a gasp and he gets lowered back to ground as the crowd shouts, “Thirty-four!”

Sean’s frat brothers jump around him excitedly, hands patting him on the back and cheering his name. He laughs as Sean starts yelling, “That’s what I’m fuckin’ talkin’ about!”

Movement from the corner of his eye catches his attention and he turns his head just in time to see you disappear into the house. He tells Sean he’ll be back in a minute and follows after you, craning his neck to scan the mass of bodies crammed inside until he spots you on the stairs.

When he finally manages to reach the stairs, he’s surprised to find them roped off at the bottom. Looking around to make sure no one is paying attention to him, he ducks beneath the barrier, taking the steps two at a time. The second floor is dark and empty but light spills into a hall from beneath the last door marked PRESIDENT.

Joel knocks on the wood, his head a little light from the rush of alcohol in his system but it has him feeling good.

Confident.

Maybe a little too confident because when you open the door, he wraps an arm around your waist, pushing his way inside as his lips find yours, a little noise of surprise swallowed by him as his tongue explores yours.

He comes to his senses when your teeth nip at his bottom lip, jarring him back to a reality where he is a mature adult who thinks with his brain and not his dick. He grips you on the shoulders, breaking the kiss and holding you at arm's length.

“Fuck, I’m sorry,” he says. “I didn’t even ask if it was okay to kiss you, just came bargin’ in here like a bull in a goddamn china shop and you probably don’t even want—“

“Joel?” You interrupt. He blinks.

“Yeah?” He asks.

“Kiss me again.”

Joel kisses you again, but pulls away a second time to ask, “Wait, how old are you?”

“Twenty-three,” you reply, giggling as he mutters a low thank god before pulling you back into his arms. It’s another short lived kiss, the man leaning back once more as you huff in annoyance.

“Wait, how much have you had to drink?” He asks this time.

“Less than you, Mr. Thirty-Four-Second Keg Stand,” you answer. He gives you a smirk that has your stomach doing somersaults.

“You liked that, huh?”

His hands slip into the back pockets of your shorts and you wrap your arms around his shoulders, fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. He kisses you again, slower this time, like he’s savoring the feel of your lips against his. Your heart is racing as he pulls you even closer and runs his hands up your back, warm palms exploring your curves like he’s trying to map them to memory.

You’re lost enough in each other that the sound of the door opening doesn’t register until an upset voice is saying, “Ugh, come on! No fucking in my room!”

“Shit,” you yelp, tearing yourself away from Joel. Craig is standing in the doorway with his arms crossed. You grab Joel’s hand and tug him towards the door of the en-suite bathroom, pulling him inside and slamming the door behind you, flipping the lock.

“Hey, wait a minute—“

“It’s not your room, Craig!” You yell through the wood. There’s a muffled curse from the other side.

“Condoms are under the sink,” he shouts back. You grin victoriously at Joel, who’s laughing so hard he has a hand pressed to his chest. You step up to him, grabbing that hand and bringing it around your waist.

“You sure about this?” Joel asks seriously, stepping forward until he’s crowding you against the door. You tilt your head up to look at his handsome face, his dark eyes so intense as he searches your face that you feel giddy.

“I mean, the location isn’t ideal, but at least Craig keeps his bathroom pretty clean,” you joke, noting the clear counter space and surprising lack of dirty clothing littering the floor.

“Answer the question, sweetheart. You sure about doing this with me?”

You reach up, tangling your fingers into his soft curls, pulling him close until your lips graze his as you respond, “I’m so fucking sure.”

Whatever tether of control Joel had been holding onto seems to snap with your words, the man kissing you so roughly that all you can do is hold on, your fingers curling desperately against his scalp as his tongue dives into your mouth and tangles with yours. He tastes like beer and smells like a mixture of cedar and sweat, the combination intoxicating as he presses close and surrounds you with it.

Joel trails his lips across your jaw, nipping your earlobe before continuing down your neck. He sucks the thin skin over your pulse before soothing the sting with his tongue as you writhe against him, gasping at the sensation. You can feel his smile against your shoulder and as he presses a thigh between your legs, you get a brief feel of his hard cock behind the barrier of his basketball shorts.

“So fuckin’ pretty,” he growls, hands trailing across your curves until he’s gripping one of your breasts, squeezing tightly.

“Not so bad yourself,” you moan. He chuckles darkly.

“The mouth on you.” He reaches two fingers into the low neck of your tank top, dragging it down over your breasts. He yanks the cups of your bra down in a similar fashion, the fabric bunched beneath your chest to expose your tight nipples to him. He dips his head down and wraps his lips around a tight bud, pulling it into his mouth as you gasp.

“Could show you some other things my mouth is good at,” you tell him as he releases your breast with a wet pop, lifting his head to look at you.

“I have a better idea,” he says, dropping to his knees. He lifts one of your legs and wiggles your boot off, tossing it to the side before doing the same with the other.

“What are you doing?” You ask when his hands reach for the fly of your shorts. He pauses, looking up at you with concern.

“I was plannin’ on eatin’ you out until you couldn’t think straight,” he says. His brows pinch together. “Do you not want that?”

“I-I’m not sure? I mean, no one’s ever…,” your sentence trails off, your eyes going wide.

Joel runs a soothing hand down your thigh, smiling up at you. “That’s a damn shame, baby. Let me show you how a real man takes care of a woman.”

You let him work your shorts and panties down your thighs, stepping out of them with a hand on his shoulder to steady yourself. He lifts one of your legs and settles it over his shoulder, opening you up to his hungry gaze. His eyes flick up to your face and he grins as he says, “Pretty all over, aren’t ya?”

Any smart reply you have died on your tongue as he starts kissing the sensitive skin of your thighs, starting at the knee that’s close to his face and moving up, up, up until you can feel his warm breath on your pussy. His tongue flicks across your clit, featherlight, but it’s enough to have you gasping his name.

He starts a rhythm of messy swirls of his tongue over your sensitive bundle of nerves before dipping down to your entrance, the tip of his nose still brushing your clit and making you moan. You buck against his face and he immediately grasps your hips in his big hands, fingers curling into the flesh of your ass to hold you still as he lavishes your pussy with attention.

“Oh my god,” you pant, reaching down to tangle your fingers in his hair. He groans at the same time his lips wrap around your clit and the sound of his satisfaction has your orgasm taking you by surprise, washing through your veins and making you feel like you’re on fire.

You feel breathless as he licks you slowly, thoroughly, his tongue making sure he’s gotten every last drop of your release. He leans back, slowly lowering your leg from his shoulder. His lips and chin are coated in your wetness, shiny in the light of the bathroom vanity, the sight making your cheeks feel hot and a nervous giggle spill free.

Joel grins, boyish and sweet. “Good?” He asks.

“Great. Amazing,” you concur. “Ten out of ten. Your Yelp review will be glowing.”

“Shouldn't I be the one leavin’ the Yelp review? You were the meal after all.”

You blink at him. “Oh my god, that was so bad,” you say, laughter near hysterical.

He stands, his palms cupping your face and pulling you into a filthy kiss that quickly shuts you up, his tongue slowly exploring yours and introducing the musky taste of yourself to your taste buds. You reach down, palming his hard cock through his shorts and the responding groan you receive from the older man has you clenching in anticipation.

Joel breaks the kiss, pulling you against his body and turning until you’re facing the vanity, your hips pressed to the edge of the laminate counter. You watch his reflection in the mirror as he runs a hand down your back, pressing you forward slightly so that you’re bent over the counter, ass slightly tilted up. His hand continues lower until it’s running reverently over one cheek. He catches your eye in the mirror.

“You gonna let me fuck you just like this?” He asks. Your breath hitches as his fingers trace through your folds, one dipping into your entrance. He watches your face in the mirror, eyes dark and expression serious. “Answer me.”

“Fuck, yes, anything,” you say quickly. He thrusts his finger slowly, curling it against your front wall with every pull from your body. One finger becomes two, the slight stretch making you whine as he continues to work them in and out of you. “Joel, please.”

“Please what, baby?” He asks.

“Need you to fuck me,” you tell him.

Joel grins, removing his fingers and urging you to the side so he can open the cabinet under the sink. He crouches down, rummaging through the contents for a moment before standing with a victorious expression and a foil packet pinched between his fingers. He shoves his basketball shorts and boxers down his thighs, just low enough to free his impressive cock, thick and long with a slight curve up that has your mouth watering. He rolls the condom on and then grabs your hips, the tip of his length sliding through your folds and making your breath catch.

“You ready, baby?” He asks, squeezing your hips. You meet his gaze in the reflection, your lips tilted in a smirk.

“Been ready for a while, old man,” you tease. He raises his eyebrows and draws his hand back, landing a sharp smack to your ass that has you crying out.

Before the sting even fades, he’s pushing inside of you with one steady thrust until his hips are flush to your ass. Your fingers curl around the edge of the counter and you lift onto your tiptoes, trying to escape the sudden sensation of his cock stretching you so well. He chuckles darkly, tight hands on your hips keeping you from going too far.

“Old man,” he taunts, mimicking the higher pitch of your voice. He reaches forward, palm resting beneath your chin as his fingers and thumb press into your cheeks, tilting your head up so that your eyes meet his in the mirror as he says, “Eyes up, sweetheart. You watch how this old man fucks you.”

Joel draws his hips back and slams forward, the head of his cock burying so deep inside of you that your eyes roll back from the exquisite stretch and pressure. He sets a rhythm that has a constant string of moans and pleas spilling from your parted lips, a slow pull out and a rough push in that makes you see stars. If you dare to let your chin drop or your eyes shut, the strong hand around your throat reminds you of his demand that you watch.

“That feel good, baby?” He grunts. “My cock in this tight fuckin’ pussy?”

“Yes, yes, yes!”

“That’s right, who’s fuckin’ you so good? Say my name, sweetheart, wanna hear it from that pretty mouth.”

“Joel!” You cry out, the tight coil of pleasure in your belly finally unraveling, your cunt pulsing greedily around his cock as you cum. He curses, his rhythm going sloppy as he fucks you through your release and right into his own.

His hand leaves your throat and his head drops to your shoulder, soft kisses being left on your shoulder blades as you both catch your breath. After a long moment, he pulls back from you, removing the condom and tying it off to toss it in the garbage.

You straighten up from your bent position over the counter, fixing your bra and tank top back into place. Turning, you find Joel holding your shorts and panties.

“Was that…are you…did you—“

You lean into him as you grab your clothes, kissing him softly. Pulling back, you murmur, “That was amazing.”

Joel sighs in relief, watching as you get dressed and tug your boots back on. “Good. That’s…good.”

“Why don’t you head downstairs first? I need to freshen up,” you suggest. Joel nods, but doesn’t make a move to leave. You raise your eyebrows at him and that seems to have him getting the hint.

“Oh! Right, I’ll just…go downstairs,” he says. You giggle, leaning into him for one more kiss before he disappears from the bathroom and you busy yourself with fixing your appearance to look a little less well fucked.

Downstairs, Joel wanders through the first floor in search of his son. He feels a flash of guilt for leaving him for so long, especially to fuck a woman half his age in a frat house bathroom, but the guilt is short lived when he finds his son with his tongue down the throat of a blonde girl in the living room.

“Jesus Christ,” he mumbles, turning to head for the front door instead. It’s getting late and now seems like a good time to head home.

He’s a few steps out the front door when he hears his name called out and you appear from the doorway.

“You heading out so soon?” You ask, bottom lip jutting out in a pout that he kind of wants to kiss from your lips. He runs a nervous hand through his hair.

“Uh, yeah. Was gonna head home,” he says. Christ, he has no idea why he’s acting so weird, but you have him tied up in knots.

“You know…my apartment isn’t far. Maybe…maybe you don’t have to go home just yet?” You say, looking up at him through your lashes.

Those knots of uncertainty loosen and Joel holds a hand out to you.

“Lead the way, baby.”

Joel Miller Masterlist

#joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller fic #joel miller x female reader #joel miller smut #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x you #joel tlou #no use of y/n #joel x reader #joel the last of us #joel miller tlou #tlou fic #tlou fanfiction #tlou hbo #tw age gap #tw age difference

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hydrngea · 1 year

Text

gyming

a/n : this was a very self indulgent fic that’s very unedited but i hope you enjoy!! this is gonna be a series of short somewhat connected blurbs of gymbro!rafe :))

summary : your first time at a new gym doesn’t start off too great until you meet your new gymbro. | rafe cameron x f!reader, rafe is a gym rat in this, reader is extremely thirsty and downbad lol, fluff.

navigation | masterlist

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

it took you a good 2 months after moving to the obx to try out the local gym.

you know, you know. there’s nothing really to be afraid of; you know how all the machines work and you don’t have to worry much about your form. it’s just now that you’ve moved away for college, you don’t have your best friend working out side by side with you. and it’s got you nervous.

you finally mustered up the courage after a long facetime call with her. you were gonna do it. expand your horizons.

you felt instantly relieved when you walked into the gym and it was empty. you always thought that nine o’clock at night was the perfect time to go, since all the machines and benches were empty a couple hours before the gym closes.

you look around. there’s about 4 people in the gym other than yourself.

there’s some guy in the corner by the deadlift platform that seems to think he’s batman;with a weird all black getup, wearing…combat boots?

another two are a really cringe high school couple. bleh.

and then the last one by the bench presses.

woah. he’s hot. you think, panning him from far away and taking him in. he’s literally lifting triple the amount of weight you can. you didn’t even know the arm had so many muscle groups.

alright, maybe this new gym isn’t so bad.

you find your way to an open bench and put your stuff down. you stare at the plates for a good minute or two and wonder what would be the best the start with. you decide on a safer weight to warm up. it has been more than a few weeks since you’ve benched.

you lay onto the bench and place you hands into position, puffing out your chest while sucking in a tight breath.

you push up on the bar and immediately regret your overconfidence. the weight moves too heavy, yet you still force yourself to continue with reps.

2…3…4..

you’re so close to hitting 6 reps, but suddenly at the end of the forth one your arms give out and the bar begins to fall on you chest.

you do your best to prepare for the blow, but it never comes. you blink a couple times and realize a pair of strong hands have pulled up the bar from you and a handsome face mirrors yours.

oh god. it’s him. the cute guy.

“easy there, sweetheart.” his gruff voice cuts through your thoughts you immediately fall in love.

he places the bar onto the hinges with ease and you quickly sit up on the bench, face burning. your hands are as red as a tomato from the right grip you had on the bar, and your wrist aches from the failed lift.

you pull your headphones off of your head and turn your neck to look at him, “i’m so sorr-“

you begin to apologize but he cuts you off with a chuckle.

“nah, what are you apologizing for? i’m sorry for not asking if you wanted a spot earlier.”

earlier? did he notice me earlier?

“this used to be my warm up.” you say with your head low, a small scoff coming out during the beginning of your sentence.

the stranger shrugs, “well for the first few sets it looked like you were handling it just fine.”

you raise a brow, not able to control the sudden urge for flirtation that comes upon you. “were you watching me?”

he crosses his arms over the bar and leans against it, shaking his head which caused his hair to shuffle a bit and his muscles to flex in the most mesmerizing way ever.

you’re sure you gawking at him and that you should probably avert your eyes from his body but you kinda can’t help it.

“of course i was. couldn’t stop but notice the pretty girl that walked in.”

you roll you eyes at the comment, shaking your head. “i doubt that i’m pretty.”

he scoffs. “you’re the prettiest girl in here.”

“is that because i’m the only girl in here?” you question, undoing your loose ponytail to redo it.

“you know what i meant, pretty girl.”

“mm. sure…pretty boy.” you test out the nickname and he smiles at you for the first time. you swear your feel butterflies all over your body at the simple action.

he takes a step out towards the front of the bench to face you. “how ‘bout we spot each other so we don’t get hurt, pretty girl?” he suggest, a lop sided smile curving onto his gorgeous face.

god. why are you so down bad for a guy you just met?

“why not?” you acquiesce, sending him your own mirroring grin in return.

you think it’s safe to say this won’t be the last time you’d visiting this gym.

—————

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starry-eyes-love · 3 months

Text

Too Young to Die- Part 1

Masterlist

Part 1 of 3 part Mini Series

Pairing | Massage Therapist Joel Miller x F!Reader with Autoimmune disease, no outbreak, AU (I changed up his timeline a bit).

Summary | You were referred to Dr. Joel Miller, a massage specialist, to help manage your joint and muscle pain with autoimmune disease. What you didn’t know was that Joel was an insanely attractive man, and that you’d be coming undone underneath him before your first appointment was even over with.

Series Warnings | 18+, Minors DNI, Smut!

Age gap (he’s 47, she’s 29), language, Smut (with a capital S, watch out!!), daddy reference, f!(fingering), squirting, female reader has autoimmune disease, Joel is a massage therapist, slight reference of medical stuff, reader verbalizes anxiety with treatment, fluffy Joel, soft Joel, sexy Joel, terms of endearment, Joel asks her out on a date at the end.

A/N: This one is completely self-indulgent and has been sitting in my draft folder since before Christmas. I have autoimmune disease, and treatment hasn’t worked much for me in many areas, so I know some of the troubles and struggles that the reader here has. Not everyone who has autoimmune disease may experience these symptoms, concerns, or struggles. This will be only a three part mini series. Very smutty with story building throughout. Enjoy!

Word Count: 9.1K (we’re establishing a story here)

Fuck you were wrecked, seconds away from crashing through, or into, a brick wall with an orgasm, you thought. This felt different though, so much different than what you’ve ever experienced before. “Joel, fuck, pressure, it’s a lot of pressure and I’m, fuck, I’m, I’m-” “Come f’me sweetheart. Come on baby, fucking soak my fingers.”

Joel Miller sat in his office of his massage studio, looking over the referral paperwork that Dr. Samson, an autoimmune specialist, had sent him. A female patient was being referred to him for treatment of musculoskeletal pain and tenderness.

“Patient has reoccurring musculoskeletal tremors of unknown origin that come and go. Bilateral joint swelling seen in all extremities with positive inflammation noted in laboratory test results and X-rays. Arthritis and arthralgia positive in all joints. According to the patient, anti-inflammatory and arthritis medication only works slightly for pain. Recommended gentle massage therapy to see if joint lubrication and increased joint mobility is plausible, and if pain and muscle tremors will cease. Immediate referral requested.”

When Joel glanced at the bottom of the form a week ago, he had seen that the referral had come in three weeks prior. Now today, four weeks after the initial referral, he was finally able to see you for the first time. When he had inquired with his secretary as to why it took so long before he saw you, she had said that there was a problem with your private healthcare insurance. Delaying treatment was never something that Joel Miller prided himself on. In fact, he was usually the opposite with trying to get his patients in for their first appointment within a week following their referral. Joel, having been a contractor in his previous life before becoming a massage therapist, knew the difficulties with treating joint and muscle pain. The goal was to never delay treatment as it would lead to widespread body inflammation. And once inflammation fully set into muscles and joints, it was harder for someone to find relief of their discomfort.

You were Joel’s next scheduled patient to arrive in 20 minutes. As he waited for your arrival, he went back over your X-rays, lab test results, and dictation notes from your autoimmune specialist. He had already reviewed it previously, but now he was refreshing himself on your in-depth history as he took some last minute notes of things that he wanted to ask you for this particular session. He had booked your first appointment with him to be about 2 hours, instead of the usual hour. Joel always conducted very detailed exams with his patients. He was also very knowledgeable in understanding autoimmune patients, especially knowing that each person was unique. He wanted to tailor a program that was going to help you specifically.

Joel Miller wasn’t just your average run of the mill massage therapist, he had a specialty license in massage. He specialized in patients with pain, joint stiffness and swelling, inflammation, autoimmune disease, injuries, etc. People usually only came to him by doctor referral, which usually meant two things. First, he prided himself on taking his time to get to know his patients and how he could help ease their suffering and pain. And second, he typically charged more money for his services. Most massage therapists would charge people a fee based on how long they performed their massage, Joel charged by the session. The maximum time he would give a client with his hands was 1 hour, but he’d pencil in 1.5 hours of time with them just in case they felt pain. Sometimes he’d have to stop and let patients breathe and relax for a minute before he started massaging their muscles again. Joel had a lot of training and education in the technique that was required, and many patients walked away from him stating that they felt a lot better. By glancing at your history he didn’t think that you’d be a one time only patient. He thinks that you would benefit from regular massages with him to help treat your inflammation and pain.

“Mr. Miller, your 10 AM appointment is here,” his secretary, Ashley, said.

“Thanks Ashley, I’ll be out in a minute. Please take her back to Room 5, and I’ll be along in a minute.” He replied, still studying the notes from your doctor and making notes for himself of the things that he wanted to focus on with you for your first appointment.

When you had arrived at the address for your first massage, you felt a sickly feeling in your stomach. Your doctor had reassured you that Mr. Miller would be the person to help you feel better. But just like all the other promises that your primary care provider gave you, and how none of them worked the way that you hoped, you were very skeptical at this new treatment option. Nothing helped you feel better, and you were beyond frustrated. It took you a bit to convince yourself this morning to come here, telling yourself that Dr. Miller was an expert at this, and that you should give him a try. What could hurt, you thought. Worst case scenario, it didn't do anything, which sadly was the norm for you these days.

For the last several years, your body had been poked and prodded more times than you would care to admit. Each time there was a promise of a better understanding or discovery of why this was all happening. But with each test, came more conflicting and confusing results, and you were exhausted from it all. You have been giving more blood for the sake of medical testing than what you’d think was truly normal. As ridiculous as it sounded, you felt that if Dracula was actually a real being, that he would be impressed with the amount of blood that you've donated for the sake of medical science.

With shaky hands, you got out of your car, locked it, and then entered the facility. When you entered you noticed that the space was calm. There was pale muted colors that covered the walls, colors that often helped people relax. But it did nothing for your nerves. You were shaking and not wanting to do any of this anymore. You felt like you had a huge lump in your throat, and that you couldn't fully swallow. Of all the things that you had to be afraid of in this world, you were the most afraid of medical treatment. Yet, that was the one thing that you were blessed with in having to always do. ‘Thanks body for betraying me with autoimmune,’ you thought.

As you walked up to the registration window, you found the secretary typing away on her keyboard while looking at her computer screen. You tried to settle your nerves before opening your mouth, but you felt like you were drowning in a pool of despair. Anxiety was getting the better of you again, and you felt like you wanted to run away and hide from everything. But where could you go when autoimmune always seemed to follow you, especially with the pain that came along with it.

“Um, excuse me,” you said meekly, after standing at the window for a brief moment.

The secretary continued to type away, not looking at you nor acknowledging your presence. You went to clear your voice again when she abruptly stopped and said, “what can I do for you hun?”

“I- uh, I have an appointment, with um, with Dr. Miller I think,” you said softly.

“Oh, hun it's just Mr. Miller, or Joel for short. He doesn't like being called Doctor. He always says he has a doctorate degree in massage, not in medicine. Yet they're kinda the same thing if you ask me.” The secretary said, shaking her head with a slight laugh. You stood there in silence, looking at her as she continued to ramble on. You were trying to listen to what she was saying, but all you could feel was your heart racing in your chest at the prospect of once again meeting a new person with the promise of helping you.

After listening to the woman who you thought was named Ashley ramble on for 15 minutes, as that was the name that you noticed on her name tag, you were finally sitting down in the general waiting area. You were slowly trying to calm down and relax while staring outside and watching the birds hunt for bugs in the grass. You didn't know how long you were waiting there, just staring outside, before you heard Ashley call your name again to take you back to Room 5. You didn’t know what to expect when you entered the room, but what you saw shocked you.

The room was softly lit, with soft music playing in the background, music that you liked. You also heard running waterfalls, sounds that came from the little fountains scattered all around the room. There was also a hint of cinnamon and slight vanilla aroma in the air, your favorite scents that would usually calm you. You tried racking your brain as to how, by chance, these scents and sounds were present when Ashley said, “it was on your intake survey. Your favorite classical music, scents, and sounds. Joel's very thorough, focusing on relaxation as much as muscle and joint relief.”

You stood there shocked. You thought those questions were just asked of people to try to ease the tension of how you were going to let a stranger put their hands on you. You had no idea that your answers would actually be taken seriously. Usually doctors, when they’ve asked those questions, never really did anything with the answers. Well, Dr. Miller was definitely different. It was at this moment that you were grateful that someone actually listened to you. You just hoped that he would continue with the same dedication while speaking with you, and not ignore what you said like everyone else seemed to do. You were frustrated with the medical field. You’d tell them something hurt, or something was happening and they only looked at your lab tests and X-rays and made decisions based on that, never actually listening to what you were truly telling them. You had only been in the room for maybe 5 minutes when you heard a gentle knock on the door, and the entrance of who you only could have suggested was Dr. Miller.

“Good day, I'm Dr. Miller but you can call me Joel.” He said while holding out his hand for you to shake. You shook his hand, and as you did, you felt how rough his hands were. They were calloused and strong, very sturdy hands. Not something that you'd expect to see from a massage therapist. This intrigued you, as you've always loved a man with rough hands.

After you introduced yourself, Joel walked over to the small desk in the room and sat down on the rolling stool. A typical doctor stool that you’ve seen countless times in exam rooms. He grabbed a piece of paper and then sat there for a moment writing a few notes, things that you thought were probably dealing with your medical file. After a moment he finally looked up at you and then asked with a slight Southern drawl, “How are y’feeling today?”

“I- I’m ok” you said meekly as you slowly looked over Joel. Joel was a gorgeous man, clearly in his later 40s with chocolate brown curly hair. He had a mustache and a slight beard by his jaw, one that had a slight sprinkling of gray in it. He also had glasses on his face with gentle eyes behind the glasses, ones that you could easily get lost in. He was wearing a simple white t-shirt, framing his broad shoulders perfectly. He had a slight tan on his arms, and hands that once again you couldn't wait to touch you. By looking at him, you didn’t think that massage was the only thing that Joel has done in his life. Something told you that he had spent many years doing hard work with his hands. As you continued your exploration, you then noticed that he was wearing a nice pair of black pants that hugged his hips perfectly. As you continued, you saw that Dr. Miller was definitely someone who was a decent sized man in the bedroom, seeing the soft bulge in his pants as he sat down with his legs slightly spread on the stool by the desk. You couldn’t help yourself but you stared at his package, wondering what it’d look like outside of the confines of his pants, and what it would feel like fully aroused inside of you. The longer you stared, the more you felt heat rise up the back of your neck. When you noticed the awkward moment of him looking at you, clearly having asked you a question that you didn't hear, you shook your head slightly, looking down fully at the floor while saying “sorry” out loud.

“It's ok darlin',” he said, giving you a small little smirk at the fact that he caught you checking him out. You were hoping that he didn’t see what you were checking out the longest though. You didn’t want to explain to your massage therapist that you were fantasizing about his package, and what types of moans or grunts he’d make while fucking your brains out.

Joel continued to talk to you, explaining why you were here, and how his services could help you. You were only half listening to him, embarrassed about how you had behaved previously. Joel was devilishly handsome, the type of guy that you were into. You were, however, internally scolding yourself at the importance of having proper social etiquette, and not eye fucking your massage therapist, which is what you were doing every time you looked at him.

As Joel continued to talk with you, he slowly moved around the room, grabbing different things off from the shelves. He instantly noticed your meek and shy attitude, even though he had caught you checking him out earlier. He had to admit, you were very cute, but Joel was a professional. He couldn’t allow himself the joys of thinking about you in a different sort of way. Nevermind, that if he wasn’t your massage therapist, he would definitely want to explore those other possibilities with you. What he did notice though was how you turned inward at the mentions of pain, autoimmune disease, and how your doctor said you didn’t have much abilities to do activities that your peers could do. You were 29, and he knew what the world did to 29 year olds who didn’t, or couldn’t, do the same things that their peers could. The world would ignore you. Joel, himself, remembered those days when he was 29 and worked construction when Sarah and Ellie, his daughters, were younger. All his friends went out partying after work, when he went home and raised a 10 year old and a 2 year old all on his own, Sarah and Ellie’s mom were already out of the picture. Joel was lost in his own head, remembering those earlier days, when all of a sudden he heard you speak up in an irritated tone.

“Mr. Miller, no disrespect, but I don’t think you understand what it’s like to not be able to do things that most 29 year olds can do.” You didn’t think he understood. So once again you found yourself trying to explain to a medical professional how much autoimmune has negatively impacted your life at such a young age, and how agitated you were at the fact that no one seemed to help you or listen to you. Joel, being the attentive man that he was, sat across from you on the stool and listened to every word that you had said.

Once you were finished, Joel took a deep inhale, then followed by a long exhale and then said “I am so sorry that people haven’t listened to you, or have taken you seriously about your concerns with your body. You’re right, I don’t know what it's like f’ya as I’m not you. But, I do know what it’s like to not be able to do everything a 29 year old can do. I may not have autoimmune, but I had different responsibilities that didn’t allow me the joys of doing everything that I wanted, including the joys of being with a beautiful woman like yourself at that age. That’s why I want to help you.”

As soon as Joel called you beautiful, he saw your reaction. You started to blush on your cheeks from the compliment. You felt flattered by the older man that was in front of you. Meanwhile, Joel internally scolded himself at how his statement wasn't proper patient-doctor etiquette. Joel had vowed to himself that he wouldn't cross that line again, especially with you, no matter how drop dead gorgeous he thought you were.

Joel began to run a few tests with you, checking your reflexes and testing your mobility. You didn’t say anything else to him after his statement. You felt embarrassed by your actions and assumptions that he didn't care or understand, when you could clearly see that he did. The longer you looked at him, the more you could see that he was someone who truly did care about helping others. You silently wondered if his treatment would actually help.

“Dr. Miller?” you asked, wanting to scratch the itch of your curiosity in understanding the treatment that he was suggesting.

“Joel” he said as he pushed on your shoulder blades. When you winced he said “are you tender here?” as he pushed on the same spot again, but this time with a little less force.

“Yeah. I’m tender there, and everywhere,” you said with a hiss as he moved his hand down to your biceps. “It’s tender inside every joint, and sometimes muscles. Winter’s in Minnesota aren’t too nice for people like me,” you said, head hanging low as a tear slipped down your cheeks.

You felt Joel stop testing your joints and muscles, hands still on your arms when he placed his finger gently under your chin, slightly tilting your head up so you could look him in the eyes. After a moment he said, “Well, we’ll try to rectify that now won’t we. Massage is more than just relaxin’, it helps a lot of people in ways that can-”

“Can it cure me?” you said, interrupting him, with wide eyes. “Cause if it can cure me, I’ll do anything. But don’t tell me that it’ll work miracles. Don't get my hopes up and then have it fail. I-I can’t take it anymore with all of the disappointment” you said, closing your eyes to take a steadying breath as tears gathered at your waterline. It has been a very long and exhausting road these past three years with your autoimmune journey. You found out early on that your body couldn’t tolerate medication, and nothing else seemed to work.

“I can’t promise that it’ll do miracles by curin’ ya, but I can promise that I’ll try my best to make you feel better. How’s that?” Joel said with a tender voice, trying to soothe your emotional discomfort of years of failed treatments. Joel remembered reading the last line of your referral by Dr. Samson which had stated;

“No treatments have been successful. Patient has voiced wanting to stop trying autoimmune treatments, stating that she didn’t feel like it was working. Patient was informed that if she decided to fully stop taking immunosuppressant medications, that the end result would be major organ damage that could lead to death. Patient agreed to try one more treatment for pain, stating that if the treatment didn’t work, then she’d stop autoimmune treatments altogether and ‘let whatever happens, happen’.”

‘Fuck,’ Joel had thought when he first read that last line in your medical file. Someone giving up, especially at such a young age, didn't sit well with him. Being 29, your entire world was still in front of you. You had a lot more years and possibilities of life in front of you. Giving up wasn't something that Joel did, and the fact that you had voiced wanting to stop treatments to your doctor bothered him immensely. Truly, it wasn't necessarily the fact that you had wanted to stop treatments that upset him. It was your willingness to allow death to potentially consume you that truly got to him. You were too young to die.

20 minutes later, you were lying on your stomach with a sheet covering your lower half. You were completely naked, scolding yourself internally that you didn’t wear underware today with your pants. Joel was slowly massaging your back, trying to work out the knots that he felt in your muscles. As his hands continued to work out the knots and tension, you felt an overwhelming sense of relief. His touch was not only skilled, but carried a reassurance that echoed through your body. You felt safe with him, safe in a way that you haven’t for a long time. You felt like if you were near him, that he’d take all the bad in the world away for you. And if you were being honest, this comfort was something that you haven't felt in a very long time from anyone.

"You're doing great, darlin’," Joel whispered, sensing your vulnerability and turmoil you had been feeling. Joel could tell that you were working through something major in your head, just like most of his patients did. Most of the time he focused on trying to distract people from their internal thoughts, giving them a break when they were here. But there was something about the silence between the two of you right now that he felt like you desperately needed. Every time he’d open his mouth to ask you a question, he’d feel you tense up, and that was the last thing he wanted you to do. So he slowly worked your sore muscles and joints, giving them the tenderness and affection that they needed, while allowing you to stay seated in silence.

Throughout the session, Joel maintained an empathetic connection with you. He explained each technique when he’d switch it up, providing you with the most gentle sense of comfort. He’d tell you what he was going to do, if he moved down your body or up, giving you moments to breathe when he felt like it was too much. But most of all, he gave you that warmth and unawkward silence that you craved. He wanted you to just live and feel, to just be in the moment with him.

As Joel's tender touch continued, you felt a warmth spread throughout your body, slightly dissipating the pain that had lingered there for so long. His words became a comforting melody, echoing a promise to you of relief. “You’re doing so good f’me, gentle breaths in and out, there y’go.” He said, encouraging you to stay centered and remain in the moment. That was the key in pain relief, staying grounded and living within the moment. When we just allow our body to feel, and not force anything, we can find peace and calmness. These feelings of peace and calmness are what leads us to having pain relief.

As Joel moved down to your lower back, you let out a hiss in pain, followed by an “ouch that hurts.”

“What hurts darlin’?” Joel said, slowing his deep strokes on your lower back, right above your tailbone area. He doesn’t remember reading in your file that you had lower back pain, so this was something new that caught him a little off guard.

“Right there, low” you said, hissing again as he pressed his finger into the lower part of your back, on your left side, by your hip.

After you hissed a second time, Joel immediately stopped and walked around to the other side of the massage table. He gently pressed on your lower back and hip joint on the other side, saying, “how ‘bout over here, does this hurt?”

“No, not as bad,” you said. “It's my left side, god that hurts.” You said, as he reached over and lightly pressed on your left side once again.

“Ok, let’s try somethin’,'' Joel said, moving completely over to your left side now. “I’m gonna hold up the blanket, where you still are covered, and I want you to flip completely on your back, okay? I wanna see if your pain continues in a different position.”

You nodded your head and then gently felt the blankets pull off from you. Joel was completely looking away from you, giving you privacy as you turned to lay on your back instead of your stomach. When you finally settled, you told him that you were ready. He then informed you that he was only going to uncover your left leg, to the mid thigh region. As he did, he explained how he was going to test your leg's range of motion to see if it was your hip joint that had caused you pain.

With only doing simple joint motions with your leg, Joel noticed that nothing was painful. When he bent your knee, pointing your knee outwards towards the left, followed by gently lifting your leg higher, to open up your pelvis more, he didn’t see any outward signs of pain from you.

“If I do this, does it hurt?” He said, placing a little weight on your leg.

As soon as your knee got about level with your pelvis you hissed again. Joel tried pushing down on your pelvic joint to determine where it hurt, but all you did was whimper. The pain wasn’t coming from your joint, it was coming from someplace else deep inside of you. When he returned your leg back down he said “I’m sorry darlin’, I can’t determine where your pain is coming from. Have you had it-”

“Just forget about it” you said, turning your head to the opposite side, closing your eyes as you felt the tears start to stream down your face.

“Hey, none of that, '' Joel said, gently turning your chin towards him so he could see your face in its entirety. “If somethin’ is hurting ya, I wanna hear about it. Help me out, where does it hurt?” When you didn’t respond right away he said, “does it hurt here” as he gently pressed on your hip bone. He watched you shake your head no. “How about here?” He asked, moving slightly inward, towards the inside of your pelvic bone.

With a shaky breath you said, “no, but it hurts straight down, but lower and inward more.”

“Here” he said, moving down about halfway where your hip joint was, towards the inside of your pelvis. You let out another shaky breath, closing your eyes as tears fell more from your cheeks, shaking your head no to him.

It took Joel a second to figure it out. But when he did, he finally understood why you were crying. You were embarrassed about what was happening inside of your body. When he moved his hand down towards the lower left side quadrant of your abdomen, and gently pushed where your ovaries were, he asked, “does it hurt here darlin’?” As soon as he applied a little bit of pressure to your left ovary area, you let out a stuttered breath, nodding your head up and down.

Joel flattened his hand on your tummy, where the sensation was, knowing what the culprit was. You were probably mid cycle and ovulating with an ovarian cyst. He didn’t remember you being pregnant, but he wanted to make sure that it wasn't an ectopic pregnancy before he ruled it as an ovarian problem.

“If I press over here, does it hurt?” Joel said, pressing on the other side in the lower abdomen. You had your eyes closed, tears lightly falling, shaking your head no.

“Ok, ok, darlin’. I know, I know. Deep breaths for me though, ok?” he said, as he watched tears stream down your face. He gave you a moment to collect yourself, before he asked his next question.

“Is there any chance you could be pregnant?” He said, slowly stroking your tummy where a baby would be laying. He knew he shouldn’t, but somehow imagining you having a swollen tummy where a baby would lay was giving him fantasies that he didn’t even know existed.

You let out a sarcastic laugh, saying, “no, it’s not that.”

Puzzled, Joel looked at you and said, “y’know, if an ectopic pregnancy happened, y’still could have a normal period. If there’s any chance that you could be pregnant, like having unprotected sex, or even if the condom broke, you probably should-”

“Joel, I haven’t had sex in 3 years,” you said, barely above a whisper. When you noticed the shocked look on his face you turned your head away from him adding, “guys really don’t want to have sex with a woman like me.”

“What’d y’mean, a woman like you?” He said, furrowing his brows at your odd phrasing.

“A woman who’s sick with autoimmune, Joel.” You said, closing your eyes and trying to pull back the tears that were threatening to fall again. You didn't want to have this conversation, and you sure as hell didn't want to admit how the act of even having orgasms were difficult for you. There were just some autoimmune embarrassments that you wanted to keep to yourself, no matter how much it shattered your soul inside. You didn't feel like a beautiful, young, sexy, attractive woman that you knew all the other single 29 year old ladies felt. You felt like you couldn’t offer anything to the male race that wasn't medical tests, sickness, and heartache combined.

Immediately Joel felt irritation and anger at your careless comment of how men wouldn't find you attractive or want to be with you. Without dwelling on it, Joel did the one thing that he knew he shouldn't, he opened his mouth to speak more on the issue. He hoped he could get you to understand that not all men were like this, that he sure as hell wasn't like this.

“Darlin’, boys, not real men, are like that. A real man wouldn’t allow sickness to stop him from wantin’ a beautiful woman like yourself. A real man would enjoy making you feel good. Real men, honey, not boys.”

Once he said it, Joel knew that he shouldn’t have opened his mouth, especially with the look that you were giving him. You looked back at him, shocked, and taken aback by his forward statement. But he couldn’t just stand there and listen to you accuse men, like him, of not caring. He would do anything to be with a beautiful woman like yourself, whether or not you were sick with a permanent illness.

After your head caught up with Joel's statement on men, you just shook your head. You then gave him a genuine, honest to god, belly laugh. “Yeah, well, Mr. Miller, show me where a real man is who wouldn’t care about all of that. Tell me who he is, because honestly, I haven’t found one single guy out there who’d be willing to have a real relationship with me because of this illness. And for the record, I can’t even get a guy to fuck me with no strings attached either. Not that I’d want that, cause I don’t do the casual sex thing, but still, you get it.” You said, snapping right back at him.

It was Joel's turn this time to look shocked. He thought to himself, why the hell has no one treated you right? He could see that you were exhausted with your own body and with your own life. He could tell that you were exhausted at the reminder of what you didn't have, of what your autoimmune disease had taken from you. He wondered if you ever truly tried, or if you just gave up right away. The longer he looked at you, the more he realized that you had tried, but obviously you weren't successful.

As you sat there partially propped up onto your forearms, you felt the tears well up into your eyes once again as you watched Joel look at you. You were embarrassed at what you had said. At admitting how easy it was for everyone else in the world to have relationships, everyone except you. Hell your own family even disowned you after your diagnosis stating that it was “too hard for them to handle.” So you've been doing this on your own, all alone, for the past 3 years. Exhausted didn't even come close to describing the way that you felt.

As you gently laid back down at this realization of loneliness once again, silently scolding yourself for opening your mouth, you accidentally hit the back of your head on the table, muttering “shit” under your breath. After a moment, you heard Joel let out another long sigh and then he gently grabbed your chin and said, “hey, look at me.”

When you looked into Joel’s eyes, he was staring back at you with concern and tenderness lacing his features. Joel saw your frustration and array of emotions, and he felt like it was important for him to take away all those insecurities by telling you that he wasn't like all those other boys you were with. With a slight smile, he gently cupped your cheek and said, “darlin’, a real man, like me, doesn’t fucking care if you’re sick or not. Men, like me honey, would take care of you regardless of the problems that you have. And honestly, it’s a damn shame that no one has ever taken their time with you, making sure your needs were met. If I was with you, I'd make damn sure you were enjoying it the entire time.”

Joel then removed his hand and placed both hands on the side of the massage table, stepping back and exhaling through his mouth as he looked down at the ground. He knew he needed to end this session right now. He's already stepped over far too many lines, and if he didn't watch it, he'd cross an even bigger one of showing you how a real man gave a beautiful woman pleasure.

You laid there watching the turmoil unfold on Joel's face. He wouldn't look up at you, kept staring down at the floor, shifting his weight back and forth on his feet periodically. He had checked his watch several times, attempted to clear his throat once, and had quickly glanced out the window. You knew those signs, he was trying to find a nice way to end the session or end the conversation. The more you watched him, the more upset you got.

After Joel stood there staring outside for a while, he finally cleared his throat again. “I- uh, I think Dr. Anderson can probably help you better, she’s very good with this type of stuff,” he said, waving his arm at you, but not looking at you.

When he straightened up to walk away you closed your eyes and said in a soft voice, “Please, please, help me.” You wanted to keep your voice steady, but you found that it slightly cracked at the end, which made you internally scold yourself. You weren't a weak person by nature, you couldn't afford to be with a disease that was slowly destroying your organs and killing you from the inside out. But somehow you felt like you were weak, like you were just a shell of the person that you once were. At first, when you asked for his help, you didn't know what exactly you were asking for. But as the seconds ticked by, with him not answering, you realized that you were pleading for him to see you.

Without looking at you, Joel asked in a gentle tone, “what do y’need help with?” When he turned back around towards you, his eyes were closed, and he was taking several steadying breaths. He was trying to calm his nerves and to silence the war that was going on in his mind. His mind was screaming at him, reminding him that this was inappropriate patient-doctor conversation or relations. He knew he needed to stop. So it shocked him to hear himself say a little louder, “Darlin’, what do you need help with?”

You just stared up at him, searching his face to see if what you wanted to voice was okay for you to do. You wanted him, as a man, to find you attractive and to touch you. But how could you ask him to go against all of his code of ethics as a medical provider just to touch you like a husband would touch a wife, desperately and passionately. You didn’t even know if he was married, or even in a relationship with someone else.

As Joel opened his eyes, he looked down at you, and it was then that he knew what you wanted. You were looking at him the same way his ex-wife used to look at him from time to time. When she’d plead with him to fuck her, to silence all her insecurities in her head. He hasn't seen a woman look at him like that for almost 20 years, and it did something to him. It made his resolve crumble instantly where he said ‘fuck it' in his own head, and he gave in to his primal instinct of helping you as a man, not as your doctor.

“Baby, come on. I ain’t gonna ask y’again. What is it that you need, honey? Tell me, and I'll do it.”

“Joel, please,” was all you could say, begging him with your eyes, trying to tell him what you wanted.

“No, now, come on. Y'gotta use your words for me. Be a good girl and tell Daddy what he can do to help you and make you feel better.”

As soon as Joel had said the word daddy, he instantly scolded himself. But when he saw your eyes glaze over with arousal at the name, he knew what you wanted. You lightly whimpered and started squeezing your thighs tight together.

Joel felt dizzy for a moment as blood rushed fast to his cock at your whimper, his cock hardening to the point of being painful. But this wasn't about him. This was about you, about showing you that a real man, like him, could give you affection and attention like you so desperately needed.

He walked towards you, gently placing his hand onto your thigh, lightly stroking it. He was trying to center you and help you communicate with him in what you wanted and needed. He knew all of this was wrong, but he couldn't help himself, especially when you begged him to touch you.

“Joel, please, touch me,” you said, while grabbing his hand and guiding it to below the blanket to where you were practically throbbing.

“F-fuck,” Joel slightly moaned, closing his eyes at the feeling of you not wearing any underwear as he touched your slick velvet folds underneath the blanket with his hand. Your lips were slightly swollen, aroused, and desperately needing attention. You were making a mess on his table, slick pouring out of you from your needy little hole. You wanted Joel to help soothe the ache deep within you, to take your pain away.

Joel slowly moved his finger down to your center. Feeling your pussy spasm and clench around nothing. He rested his finger at your opening, not pushing his finger inside of you just yet, but slowly stroking it with feather-like touches. “Baby, we shouldn’t do this” he said, still slowly circling your opening, and not stopping or pushing his finger in. He needed to hear your verbal confession that you wanted this, that you wanted him. As Joel felt your hole clench a second time at nothing, he said, “baby, please, say somethin’.”

You moaned slightly while opening your hips up to allow him better access to you. “More” was the only audible thing that you could say at the moment. And that's when Joel’s resolve fully crumbled, and he pushed two fingers knuckle deep inside of you, stretching you perfectly around him.

“Fuck baby, that's tight. Ya squeezing my fingers in a goddamn vice.” He said, growling low, followed by a soft grunt.

You willed yourself to relax, to allow Joel in more. To allow him to get deeper within you, to where you knew that you needed him. To say his fingers were a stretch was an understatement. His fingers were longer and thicker than what you were used to. It was a comfortable stretch, but almost borderline on being painful. You've never been stretched out this much with just fingers alone. If you had to guess by his slow movements he was doing right now, you thought that Joel was a very experienced man, especially when he curled his fingers and found that spot deep within you that you've never found before. As soon as he hit it, your eyes rolled back in your head and you softly moaned “fuuuck.”

“There she is, right there huh, baby?” He said, angling his hand a bit more to get a little deeper as he started to stroke your g-spot with those perfected come hither movements.

Joel was good at three things: First, he was a very hard worker. He had the perfect street smarts to own and operate two successful businesses in his lifetime. Second, he was an amazing father. Always listening and being there for his girls. And finally, he was an attentive lover. He listened, and found what worked for every woman that he’s ever been with. He knew how to fuck a woman just right, and how to bring her the most and best pleasure. And that was something that he made sure you understood at the moment with his fingers.

As Joel continued to work his magic with his fingers, pushing them a little deeper inside of you, and picking up the pace in stroking you, you felt your walls spasm more. You let out a low moan, breathing starting to become erratic as the sensation of pleasure took over your body. You were right, you obviously hadn't had a good fuck for a long time, especially considering that you were not far from coming undone on just his fingers alone with no clit stimulation whatsoever. And if you could describe the feeling that you were feeling right now with his fingers moving inside of you, you would describe it as being ‘fucking fantastic.’

Joel found himself matching your small moan with a groan of his own, especially when he looked down and noticed your pussy was dripping all over him. He slowly started withdrawing his fingers, giving you time to adjust, before pushing them back in. It was obscene, the wet squelching noises that your beautiful cunt was making for him. You were biting your lip, eyes casted away from him. He gently grabbed your chin with his other hand, turning you towards him while saying “no darlin’, eyes right here. Ya keep ‘em on me, ok?” He said, as he slowly kept pushing his fingers in and out of you. He kept up the slow pace for a bit, working you up, not wanting to fully tip you over the edge just yet. He knew that you needed this, that you needed to enjoy the experience.

“Joel, it feels- fuck, it feels, it feels,” you were at a loss for words at the moment. You were struggling to keep your eyes on him right now, fighting them from wanting to roll back into your head at the sensation of pleasure.

“I know baby. Fuck, just listen to her, she needs this huh? Your pussy needs this, doesn’t she? This. Nice. Slow. Finger. Fuck, huh?” He said, slowing down more and thrusting harder with his fingers at every word he said, drawing out your pleasure more. The longer he fucked you slow with his fingers, the more your pussy gripped him hard, sucking him in, not wanting him to leave. You were panting, starting to squirm, getting lost in the pleasure. Joel wanted to tease you a little longer, but he figured you weren’t used to this kind of play. Something he intended to do next time he had you alone, preferably in his bed with you begging for his cock.

When Joel saw you start to match his thrusts with your own, he knew it was time for him to tip you over the edge. So Joel really started to finger fuck you you now, the way that he knew women liked. When he did that, you cried out at the stimulation and surprise of his actions.

“Shhh baby, it's alright,” he said, cooing at you to quiet you down. “Now, darlin’, you’re gonna be a good girl and come all over these fingers, ok? Then you're getting a full refund today. I don't charge money to finger fuck my clients.”

You nodded your head, trying to keep your eyes open as Joel massaged the inside of your velvety warm walls, getting closer to the edge. Your toes were starting to curl, breathing was very erratic. You were getting very close to cumming.

“And lastly sweetheart,” he said, putting pressure down on your lower abdomen, and curling his fingers in a way that he knew would make your vision go blurry, while building a firm pressure sensation inside of your abdomen. “You must communicate with me with your words when something doesn't feel good, or if you want me to do something differently. You know your body better than me honey. I don't, so help me make you feel good. Okay?”

“Come f’me sweetheart. Come on baby, fucking soak my fingers” Joel growled in your ear as the rubberband inside of you snapped hard. When it did, your cunt seized around his fingers as you felt the gush of fluid come out of you, he made you squirt for the first time. Your vision went white, ears ringing, legs shaking from the intensity of it all. You’ve never come so hard ever in your life, and you couldn’t help the loud moan that escaped your lips around Joel’s hand that was now covering your mouth. He continued to fuck you through your orgasm, whispering “good fucking girl” with a strained voice as he watched you come undone. His own pupils were blown wide, eyes impossibly dark with lust, wanting nothing more than to bury his cock deep inside of you, to feel you spasm around him hard like this. But that would have to happen at a later time. Today was about you, about giving you something that you needed, attention from a man. You were a beautiful woman, and you deserved to have a man take care of you in this way, and other ways too, even if you did have autoimmune disease.

Joel continued to slowly work you through your high, pumping his fingers gently in and out of you. When you finally came back to Earth, he removed his soaked fingers from your cunt and then he slammed his lips hard against your mouth, kissing you fervently. You licked the seam of his lips, asking for access into his mouth, which he quickly granted. You two were wrestling your tongues together, each seeking dominance over the other. Joel has never been kissed like this, with so much passion that he hated pulling away from you mere moments later, gasping for breath as his heart raced out of control in his chest.

“Fuck woman, no one’s ever kissed me like that,” he said, gasping for breath. Joel placed his forehead gently against yours, eyes closed, breathing you in as his heart rate slowed in his chest.

“Do you want me to take care of you?” you asked, laying your hand gently on his crotch, feeling him buck slightly into your touch beneath you.

“No baby, I wanna do this right, take ya out first, if y’don’t mind.”

“You don't have to if you don't want to, I mean-”

Joel snapped open his eyes and stood up looking at you, furrowing his brows. He then shook his head and said “don't”, and walked over to the sink in the corner of the room to wash his hands. You sat up, chewing on your lip, overthinking things once again. After a moment of silence you heard him speak when he shut the water off.

“I'm not some 20 year old punk ass boy who only cares about getting his own rocks off, darlin'. I don't do that sort of thing. Now, if you don't want to have dinner with me, then that's fine. But I'd really like to take y’out.”

“Like a date?” You asked, looking into his eyes hopeful.

“Yes baby, like a date.” He said, standing in front of you, holding a robe up for you to take to cover your naked body up.

“Yeah, but what happens when I- when we- when it's done? Or what happens if I can't because of this- because of autoimmune?” you say, motioning your hand up and down at your body.

Joel took a big breath in, and then slowly let it out through his nose. He then cupped your face with both hands and said, “ok, I'm gonna stop you right there. First, I don't fuck on the first date, ok, so don't worry your pretty lil’ head about it. And second, I don't give a damn if we have to reschedule. I understand you have autoimmune disease, remember I've read your file.” Joel immediately winced at that reminder, of how he has crossed every line in the sand with his actions. He didn't know how he was going to explain to Dr. Samson that his treatment wouldn't work with you and that he was going to refer you to Dr. Anderson. It was going to cost him big time, he knew that. Dr. Linda Anderson wouldn't just drop it, she'd want an explanation. But Joel couldn't think about that right now, he'd deal with it and her later.

“But Joel it's-”

“Do you not want to go out to dinner with me?” He asked, the color draining from him face. Did he read you wrong? Were you just looking for a quick orgasm and nothing more? He rubbed his neck in embarrassment, thinking he completely fucked up at your signals once again. “You-uh, you don't have to say yes if you don't want to. I mean, if I read you wrong you can- uh, no pressure to say no.” He was internally scolding himself at this entire situation, of how much he's fucked up today. His ex-wife was right, he thought, he definitely doesn’t understand what women need nor want. Proof was here, right in front of him, with your reluctance to say yes to just dinner.

Joel turned to walk out, mumbling “I'll give you some privacy to get dressed. I'll tell Ashley to give you a refund when I see her tomorrow, don’t worry, she’s already left for the day. And you can just forget about today if you want, if I made you feel uncomfortable. I’ll sorry, I just-”

“Stop, please,” you said, grabbing his arm. “Don't leave. Everyone does, everyone leaves me. I-I want you to stay with me right now, please.”

Joel stopped and looked at you, seeing the gears in your head turning. After a moment he said, “please honey, ya gotta tell me what you're thinking. I can't-”

“I want to go out on a date with you Joel, it's just, don't have high expectations or hopes for me, ok? Men do, and then as they get to know me they- they get mad when I don't meet something that they wanted. I- this- it’s hard ok? It’s hard ‘cause I have a gorgeous man in front of me that I've been attracted to since the moment I saw him, and all I want is for him to see me. To really see me. And I- I don’t wanna fuck that all up where you hate me, or think I’m a failure and I- I should just really stop talking.” You said, laughing at yourself and blushing at the fact that you just spilled all of your insecurities in the air to a stranger. A very hot stranger, but a stranger nevertheless.

“Honey,” he said, grabbing your hand softly. “I want all that too and, if I'm being honest, I'm a little scared of a date too as it's been a long time since I've done this. The whole dating thing, it hasn’t been a priority of mine for a while. But I wanna do it f’you, with you. We can take it slow, we can figure it out together, ok? How does that sound?” Joel then leaned in and gave you a soft, delicate kiss on your lips, one that immediately calmed your nerves.

“Ok, yes. Dinner would be great,” you said, a tad breathless after Joel pulled away from kissing you. You took a moment to compose yourself, to will the butterflies to calm down in your tummy at the thought of getting a chance to have a date with this man.

Joel watched the blush rise up in your cheeks, and if he was being honest, it flattered the hell out of him. That a simple gentle kiss could get you all hot and bothered, where you were blushing for him. “Ok, good,” he said, smiling. “How about I pick you up around 6pm this Saturday?”

You nodded your head, and noticed that Joel furrowed his brows at the lack of your speaking to him again. You quickly said, “Saturday would be perfect.”

Joel stood there for a moment, glancing over your features, looking at you intently, making sure that you in fact truly wanted this. Once he found what he was looking for, he stepped back and gave you a small smirk.

“Ok, darlin’. Now for life's biggest, and most important question. What toppings do y’like on your Pizza?” Joel decided to take you to his favorite pizza place on Saturday. When he saw you smile, he knew that he picked a good choice.

“Well Miller,” you said, while giving him your best playful smirk. “You’re just going to have to take me out to find out.”

End of Part 1

Dividers by @saradika-graphics

Top banner by Artist on Instagram: caimages_love

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circeius-invidioso · 3 months

Text

I do not get why the Red Corsairs are not a popular choice.

Like.

Like here is the elevator pitch for the warband and then we can come to some justified conclusion.

What isn't there to love?

You want me to turn into an infomencial and make a top 3 reasons why the Red Corsairs are great?

Cause I can.

And I will.

The Diverse Working Enviroment

Here in the Red Corsairs we might have started as Ultramarines but the barrier for entry is on the floor. So anyone can join.

You are Night Lord with a bad rep and no ship.

Buckle up we got you covered.

You are a Fallen and have 20 Dark Angels all up in yo business? Trying to shoot down the boss babe you are?

Fear not, or in our case. Know no Fear. We are strapped and don't get clapped.

You are a traitor that likes their Legion but sadly you got in our way?

Tough luck buddy, you will join or die and your geene seed will join our cause. Nothing personal battle brother. Just business as usual.

Everyone is welcome as long as they follow Huron's guidelines and don't aggitate the topless sweaty Khorne worshipping Ultramarines in the basement.

Sustainability

Unlike the corrupt Imperium of man and the corpse Emperor our leader is powered by miracles (which is trully a miracle how he survived but that on the next section), and we use 0 psyckers to power our crap.

Our carbon footprint is also minimum as we use salvaged goods and don't indulge in toxic industries that destroy worlds.

The Red Corsair base of operation is in the Eye of Terror and from there we expand our scope. A place greatly known for its constant shifts, and horrible conditions but the tan our serfs have are spectacullar from all that cosmic radiation.

Finally we are commited to recycling. As in we take from our victims benefactors and put those stolen goods to some great use. Nothing goes to waste, neither mortal, nor static object. If something is not nailed on the floor we will take it.

In fact we might take the floor too and the nails used to set it in place.

Nothing goes to waste!

Unmatched Leadership

Last, but certainly not least.

The man.

The myth.

The Legend.

Huron Blackheart.

Aka Lufgt Huron.

Aka what would happen if we gave a compressed Guilliman a daemonic familiar and left him to ferment in a warp storm.

Not only the name is so edgy you might cut yourself by saying it out loud. But also it's complex enough that if you say it quickly three times without twisting your tongue theres is a chance furniture might start levitating.

The man has put his Ultramarine brain to use and amased enough influence and power to put the Black Legion to shame.

Huron went from 0 to 100 in no time, he is a self made Warmaster. With no daddy issues or troubles in the world, he goes into battle blasting Alestorm in the voxxcasters.

He does not care.

He probably wears this when he wants to relax.

You think he cares?

He does not care.

He has a biker gang specifically organized to hunt down those who have betrayed him.

They slap those things on their armors not for the usual biker reason

(which fun fact the meaning is, 99% of the bikers are law-abiding, where the 1% are not. That's where the 1% comes from. The more you know 🌈)

no they wear that 1% because that's how high are your chances of escaping from them are.

Is that a bit extreme?

Yes.

You think he cares?

He does not care.

The dude once gathered his buddies and decided...

to you know. Have a casual outing. Nothing too serious, it was a sunday afteral.

So they decided on.

Kidnapping Guilliman.

Which they almost did if not for a Fallen of all people getting in the way.

But still.

The mad lad took Macragge's Honour and went on a joyride/ mini civil war.

Who in the galaxy can turn and say.

Yeah, I stole Macragge's Honour, almost captured my old Primarch. Told a daemon prince they are irrelevant on my way there. Anyway after crushing a fool who thought he could take my crown as king of the space pirates, I went to the home planet of the White Scars and kidnapped and tortured their Chapter Master. What did you do this week? 💅

Who wouldn't want to be a part of that?

You tell me I can be an immortal, gorgeous chaos Ultramarine goth boy going on pirate adventures across the galaxy?

Where do I sign up?

I don't need ink for a signature.

I will use my own blood.

#warhammer #warhammer 40000 #warhammer 40k #wh40k #shitpost #red corsairs #chaos ultramarines #chaos space marines #games workshop #black library #huron is the chaos ultramarines representation we deserve

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plumpedxprincess · 1 year

Text

The Breeding Facility (Part 3)

reader insert | accelerated pregnancy | multiples | rapid hyper preg | alien pregnancy

a/n: this is most self indulgent and last part. definitely borrowed some of these ideas from other stuff i’ve read over the years

~~~

After your last three pregnancies were quadruplets, you were getting tired of the same thing happening. Your body’s growth still was incredible to you, but going home to your little bedroom all alone wasnt feeling like enough anymore.

As you talked with the other pregnant patients in the facility, you started hearing rumors about the men upstairs. At first you assumed they were talking about the owners of the facility, but you soon learned in one of the other wings of the center, there was an upstairs area dedicated to different breeding facilities.

Breeding facilities with men of another species.

The pregnancies were more extreme than anything here, and you were curious. You were greedy, selfish, wanting to know what was happening as well as get in on it.

At your last check up before labor with your current set of twins (a change of pace to make sure your body was still doing well), you asked your doctor about it.

“Oh, yes, there is a separate breeding facility for a different project. We are helping produce population for an alien species.” Dr. Ambrosia says, looking over your paperwork, “Honestly, hun, with your history, you would be a perfect candidate.”

After expressing your interest, she goes on, “Instead of being inseminated artificially, you will have sex with one of our volunteers. You get put up in an apartment home for the next few weeks and stay with him. Since the pregnancy is different from humans, there are some changes.”

Your doctor tells you about how these pregnancies last a little longer even while accelerated, and that the side effects are different. That’s why you stay with the father.

You sign some paper work and not even three days after you give birth, you are whisked away to the second floor.

Your new home is lovely, a studio with a small kitchen with a stocked pantry, a living and dining room, and a bed in the far corner.

You are only standing in the room for three minutes before a man enters. He is tall, broad, and his skin gives off a purple hue. He smiles at you before walking toward you.

His handsome features captivate you, making it easy when you realize he’s the one you’ll be having sex with. It’s not long before you are on all fours on the bed, completely naked as he plows into you.

His dick is quite large and when he comes, he releases more than you anticipated, leaving you bloated with cum.

You fall asleep soon after than, but wake to your hunger. Not only for food but also for him.

You break open the snack pantry, devouring three sleeves of cookies and crackers in less than five minutes. When you finally pause, you look down to see your stomach has swelled to look six months large already. Your belly isn’t as firm as it normally is, it’s a little softer, and you rub your hands over it excitedly.

“Do you feel it?” a voice calls behind you.

You turn around to see the man.

“Do you feel hungry for food and hungry for more seed?”

You find yourself nodding at him. He smiles and as he fucks you across the dining table he whispers in your ear the fact that he got you more pregnant.

Was it possible that this species could impregnate the same person more than once at a time? You came to the idea that you would be absolutely massive in just a few days.

And massive you were. Not even six more rounds of sex and you were barely able to walk. You were sprawled out on the couch presently, as your man fed you dinner.

When he wasn’t feeding you, he was fucking you. It was a lovely time. He took great care of you.

The best part was the companionship, the belly rubs, the food, the help getting up out of a chair.

With all the fucking you were doing, you had to keep eating. Every time he fucked you, a new baby was added. Along with the growth spurts from the already present babies, you were getting large quite fast.

Your belly was past your knees in just a few days. You couldn’t see your feet. Your arms had to rest on your belly with how wide you were. All you wore was a skimpy tank top that barely covered the swell of your breasts.

Your man constantly rubbed your belly. You found that when he mumbled something near your navel, your belly started to swell even more. You wondered when you would ever stop growing. You didn’t mind though.

A doctor came to visit on the fourth day, after countless fucks and more food than you had ever eaten in your past pregnancies combined. You were seated up right in the bed, where you hadn’t been able to move from since this morning.

Your doctor said you looked good though, and that once the very first baby implanted was ready for labor the rest would follow shortly after. She said it could still be a few days or even a week.

You moaned as you ran your hands over the swell of your belly. It was gargantuan. You couldn’t see the TV anymore. You could only see belly.

You moved your hands to your breasts which were more sensitive than ever. You were hornier than you had ever been.

As if senses your needs, you felt a pair of hands descend on your belly, rubbing in big circles. The man you had once described as a giant was now looking small in comparison to you.

“Are you hungry for more?” he asks.

“I just ate 10 minutes ago?” you ask back confused.

“no,” he says, “hungry for more of this.”

he mumbles against your skin and you feel a flutter of kicks, hearing a gurgle of motion as your belly expands even more.

You moan at the sensation, horny as ever by your expanding body, and he slides his cock into you.

When the expansion finally stops, he comes, dumbing another round of cum, another child into your already colossal dome of a belly.

“I can’t move,” you mumble later as he feeds you more food to feed your young.

“You don’t need to move, only grow.”

This is an insanely crazy mess you’ve gotten yourself into, but you can’t seem to mind.

~~~

It’s officially been a week, with no sign of stopping. The bed you are resting on must be made of extreme materials, because you now fill most of it, and your partner has to sleep on the couch.

Despite your massive size, he still fucks you, still mumbles his expansive words on you, still feeds you like there is no tomorrow.

With all the kicking and constant motion within your belly, you want them out. You miss going for walks outside. You miss when your tits werent taking up most of your vision.

You miss not being horny constantly. It was fine with the other pregnancies but with how large you’ve become you feel nothing but the need of release.

Your man is preparing food in the small kitchen, and you can barely see him around the large dome of your belly. You are seated half propped up in bed, which is the only comfortable way you’ve been able to lay these past few days.

You’re debating asking him to fuck you after he feeds you. Part of you wants it extremely badly. The other part of you isn’t sure how much bigger you can handle being. If you’re this horny at this size how much worse will it get before you finally go into labor?

As you see him finish up in the kitchen, you stroke the sides of your massively inflated midsection. You haven’t seen your belly button in days, let alone be able to touch it.

When you see him start to walk towards you, you feel it. Not labor, no, but another growth spurt. Oh god.

You aren’t sure how it’s possible for you to get any bigger, but you do, as you frantically rub your hands in circles around your belly. Whenever there’s a growth spurt, the babies inside of you get riled up, causing something along the lines between pain and pleasure.

Your man sees this, and sets down the plate next to you and plants his hands on your belly too. His eyes are filled with hunger but you aren’t even sure he will be able to reach your core to do anything about it. He’s filled you up so much. To the absolute max.

You’re immobile, completely owned by this man at this point. at his will.

You wondered how much longer you could last.

~~~

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ukiyowi · 7 months

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Past Life PAC ✫

Note: Have fun and take care also stay hydrated muah muah, photo credits me that's why they suck (/hj) If you like the pac please reblog!! It helps a lot 💏

1 -> 3

Masterlist ✧ Paid readings ✧ Tip Jar

🍄 Pile 1

☆ You were someone who was constantly transforming, both spiritually and mentally and may have gone through multiple cycles. You were someone who took things in stride and believed that everything will turn out well even if it didn't seem that way. You had a tendency to change a lot in a small period of time to the extent of people not recognising you, you may also have been extremely intellectual and learned, being interested in the arts and subjects like philosophy or psychology. You wanted to get to the bottom of everything in existence and were very curious. However, you also tended to be stuck in the past, reliving old days and collecting old ornaments, nostalgia held you back. You didn't travel a lot nor did you want to, you were set in your ways and your self-doubt led to you missing out on opportunities that would have made you thrive.

☆ Your life on the other hand, was nothing short of glamourous. You were probably born in a wealthy and well to do household with servants and butlers, people were at your beck and call. You may have been close to your father and he may have had a huge impact on you and your decisions. Your life looked perfect from the outside but it was not what you desired. You wanted to make a name for yourself however could not due to restrictions put on you by your family members. You may have tried to stand up for yourself but were only lectured or turned down. Your sibling’s nay has gotten more chances than you did and you felt life to be unequal and unfair. You may have had an unstable family life, and their unhappy marriage may have affected your views on love.

☆ Initially you did not feel fulfilled in your long-term relationship and both parties may have been involved in infidelity and bring closed off about their relationship. This relationship could have been established against both of your wills as a business deal or relationship for the profit of the families rather than the individuals. This harboured a lot of negative feelings from both of your sides, and you both were unwilling to commit. You may have left your home to go be with this person. However, as time passed, you leading to a deeper level of emotional understanding. From this point on, it may have felt like fate or magic that brought you two together. You may have had one child together.

☆ You've learnt your karmic lessons in your previous lifetime and this lifetime is like a blank slate. You understand and accept how the universe is trying to guide you and are more spiritually enlightened, you may have psychic abilities that may be related to your calling in life. You're starting over completely and you will feel called to indulge and try out different activities and hobbies, and enjoy life at its fullest.

🍄 Pile 2

☆ You were indecisive and lacked direction in life. You felt trapped in every situation you were in and were quite pessimistic, which developed a lot of self-limiting beliefs you never tried to grow out of. You were a fatalist and believed you couldn't do anything to make your life better, and were doomed from the start for a lack of better words. You may have been apathetic and a sceptic and were quite discontent and angry with the universe. You may have spent hours, days even months soul searching, you loved nature and believed that it had the power to heal, you may have liked meditating in caves. You tried to be introspective and listen to your inner guidance, but due to your impulsiveness you never did.

☆ You may have lived a life that was lively but you didn't feel like you belonged. Your family may not have been the most well off but you made it work. Seeing them struggle you may have taken it upon yourself to study and educate yourself to find a way to help. You planned a lot and spent loads of time trying to decide what to do, only to come up empty handed because you believed you wouldn't want to live an empty life. You may have gone through a lot financially, and faced homelessness in your adulthood as well as a myriad of financial problems and health problems leading to a lot of loss. Your feeling of not belonging lead to you lashing out at people randomly making you stay away from romantic relationships, being averse to the very idea of it, you may have gone through more than one marriage due to separation or divorce.

☆ You may not have been the luckiest in matters of the heart either as your relationships may have fallen apart due to lack of communication and secrets from either of the parties, you may have gone through a divorce or your s/o leaving you in the past for someone else, however when you did end up meeting someone that you felt comfortable with, you tried your best to communicate with them. You may have felt like your love and affection towards them was illegal (I'm getting lgbtq+ vibes but it can be a secret romance or inter-religion/caste too) and that you need to get rid of your feelings before either of you get in trouble. You may have been avoiding the reality of the situation at the start but after a period of time you may have decided to either get together regardless of what people say, or, eloped. This made you feel free and content, however there were still certain commitment issues and the love fizzled out after a brief period of excitement, and did not procreate rather choosing to live a calm and peaceful life alone in the hills.

☆ Your lesson to learn in this life is to find value in things that are not necessarily materialistic and to stop trying to run after money, and let it flow into your life naturally. You're meant to learn how to balance work and life without burning out in both areas, and learn how to actually execute your plans and work on them rather than simply staying in the planning stage. You need to learn how to accept challenges without doubting your abilities and skills because you already possess what you need.

🍄 Pile 3

☆ You were an extremely traditional person and held strong conventional ethics and morals that made you come off as a perfectionist or stickler for the rules. You were an extremely 'by the book' person and believed that nothing could go wrong if you followed all the rules. You were also extremely religious and prayed every morning, you may have felt very connected to the divine and felt that someone was watching over you. You may have been overbearing and harboured a lot of insecurities especially in regards to your own self but physically and mentally and felt like you were never growing or moving forward.

☆ You may have moved slowly in your life, you may have had a strict and traditional upbringing, with your family being close knit and extremely loving. You had very supportive people around you that always tried to lift you up no matter what and offered their wisdom and advice whenever you needed it. You may have progressed slower than others in terms of your career, but your uncertainty never stopped you from doing what you wanted. You may have travelled a lot in search of what you want to do, and may have wanted to teach or be involved in a career that allows you to impart knowledge. You may have faced failure multiple times and put in a lot of effort in everything you did but we're let down frequently before you could find the correct path. You may have worked in a field where you helped guide people or helped children, you were also someone who got exhausted easily.

☆ You may not have had a lot of romantic relationships and had an arranged marriage which was conducted traditionally. You had similar values, ideas and opinions which led you to have great conversations and you gave each other mutual respect. You were both extremely committed to each other and had similar goals which could mean you both worked towards it together, leading to prosperity and abundance in your career after this relationship as you both built each other up. You both will prioritise your relationship and involve each other in your daily lives, keeping the other in the loop. You'll also make big financial decisions together and have a balanced relationship. You may have two kids together as well.

☆ In this life you're meant to learn how to be alone with yourself without feeling lonely. You are meant to introspect and search for what you truly desire deep in your heart and to stop settling for things but rather striving for more. You'll be learning how to be more intuitive and to be open to taking a spiritual path in the future, while making major sacrifices especially in regards to your ideas or beliefs in order to be more open minded.

All Credits and Rights Reserved to Ukiyowi. Do not STEAL do not PLAGIARISE

#pick a card reading #tarot readings #tarot reading #pac reading #pac #pick a card #pac readings #tarotblr #tarot cards #tarot #tarot commissions #tarot community #intuitive readings #intuitive #pick a pile reading #pick a pile #pick a picture

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sleepingdeath-light · 6 months

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relationship hcs ; astarion

requested by ; mod / self indulgent

fandom(s) ; baldur’s gate 3

fandom masterlist(s) ; here

character(s) ; astarion ancunin

outline ; “dating headcanons for astarion”

note ; i have never played this game and am going completely off of the clips and guide videos i’ve been watching pretty much nonstop for the past week so apologies if my characterisation is at all shaky in this piece

warning(s) ; brief references to canon torture, self worth struggles, and other related angst — but otherwise mostly fluff!

when it comes to being in a relationship with you — a real relationship, that is, and not the act he was putting on to try and manipulate you at the start of your journey as a group — astarion is, for lack of a better analogy, very much so a fish out of water

and, thankfully, that’s not something he’s ashamed or scared to admit to you, so the early days of your relationship are filled with a lot of trial and error as you navigate your new dynamic and he adjusts to being permitted to make his own decisions and set his own boundaries

some things definitely come easier than others for him — namely verbal shows of affection like using pet names for you or being playful or flirty whenever you’re together; things that are more instinct than anything else, but no less genuine in their use

as one might expect, astarion does also use quite the variety of pet names for you — to the extent that your friends have a running joke about him not actually knowing what your real name is (which he always refutes with about as much sass as one might expect) — with his main terms of endearment being ones that he settled into using early on like ‘darling’, ‘beautiful’ (or ‘handsome’ if that is your preferred term), ‘my dear’, and, when he’s being a bit of a tease, ‘my little treat’

actual physical intimacy, however, is a much different story given his rather unfortunate history with his body and how he was forced to use it by his tormentor

of course he knows that you’re different, that you’re not like cazador or his ilk, but that doesn’t make those old habits any easier to break, nor two hundred years of trauma easier to shake from his mind — love and patience can only go so far, after all, and those memories and their effects on him won’t just vanish overnight

so, naturally, that means that adjusting to physical touch unrelated to sex is a very slow process for him — though he’s thankful to have you there with him throughout

there are a few things that he learns he really quite enjoys and makes that abundantly clear to you when you’re together: kisses, gentle touches to the hand, and hugs, mainly

oh and his kisses are truly marvellous once you help him accept intimacy unconnected to sex — they’re soft and sweet but no less passionate for it, starting off with a brief peck before he turns his head and gently (oh so gently) grasps your chin or cheek or neck and pulls you closer to him, almost as if you’re melting into each other as the kiss either deepens or makes way for a string of chaste pecks before you eventually pull apart for whatever reason

he also always makes sure to sooth any places he’s bitten with some apologetic kisses once he’s had his fill (as well as plenty of compliments on your person and about your blood)

his other favourite places to kiss you are either on your hands or wrists (the gentleman that he is): the insides of your wrists, the tips of your fingers, each of your knuckles in sequence, the backs of your hands, your palms when you cup his face in your hands — truly the list is endless and he delights in finding new ways to fluster you and make you smile

shit talking and gossipping amongst yourselves is extremely common and astarion has mastered the art of saying just the right thing about someone he doesn’t like just loud enough for you to hear at the perfect time to make you laugh (or try your best to cover said laugh if you’re currently talking to the subject of said shit talking)

when it comes to sleeping arrangements, astarion just loves being held (but not too tightly so he still has the freedom to get up and walk away for whatever reason if he needs to), but the specifics of the position don’t really matter to him — he’s just as happy to have you laying on his chest, or him on yours if you’re larger than him, as he is to cuddle you on his side (though he does secretly prefer to either be the little spoon or to have his face level with your chest when you’re both on your sides as it makes him feel safer, though it will take him a long time to ever even consider admitting to that)

he is naturally very protective of you and has been known to pull a dagger on anyone he deems as a threat to you — which is very beneficial in combat scenarios or situations where you are actually at risk, but a bit inconvenient when you’re trying not to draw any attention to yourselves and the issue is just some drunk that can’t keep quiet (still not good and something that should be called out, but perhaps not worth having to leave the town you just got to early as to avoid getting charged with yet another crime)

he doesn’t quite know what to do with himself whenever you’re unwell for whatever reason (especially if it’s something a healer can’t contend with) because it’s been centuries since he’s experienced any sort of illness so he can’t even really empathise with you about your situation — he tries his best, of course, but it’s easy to tell that he’s really out of his depth

no matter how long the two of you have been together, astarion still melts whenever you ask his permission to do the smallest of things (like asking if you can kiss him or hold his hand, for example) — but he melts even more when you accept when he declines for whatever reason becaus the novelty of being respected and loved without expectation or conditions never really wears off for him and he appreciates it all just as much as he did the first time

#sleepingdeath #gender neutral reader #fluff #fluff hcs #bg3 fluff #astarion ancunin fluff #baldur’s gate 3 fluff #baldur’s gate 3 x reader #bg3 x reader #astarion ancunin x reader #bg3 astarion fluff #bg3 astarion x reader

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wangxianficfinder · 6 months

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In the mood for...

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1. Hi could you please suggest some

A) Omega Wei wuxian alpha lwj fanfics?

B) And fox wwx dragon lwj with good plot too @lostsoul234

1A)

A/B/O Comp

🧡 shoot your shot -- hot or knot by defractum (nyargles) (E, 51k, WangXian, Modern AU, A/B/O Dynamics, Reality Show, Hunger Games Setting, Canon-Typical Violence, Extremely Dubious Consent, Getting Together, Happy Ending, Humor, Additional Warnings In Author's Notes) (link in #6) would probably work?

@archeaologies said: re your latest 'im in the mood for' post, 1b (foxxian and dragonji fics): ive been slowly putting together a massive rec list on my sideblog (@lansyuan) of exactly this au - its currently sat in my drafts but if op wants to pm me on my sideblog then i can link them all the fics ive collected so far! 🥰

Shape-shifter AU Comp

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2. I was wondering if yall wouldn't mind reccing any favorite Chengxian canon Era fics? @dragonfairies

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3. Itmf for wangxian post canon where WWX is threatened to sacrifice himself for LWJ. It can be any case fiction with an interesting villain making their life hard. @paraffin22

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4. Hello, thank you for all your wonderful recommendations! Itmf LXC takes care of WWX

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5. Itmf omega WWX presenting for lwj

#2 in this fic finder might have a few you would enjoy

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6. Itmf wangxian survival fics, like wilderness or cold, etc

and from our own/live to ourselves by betweentheheavesofstorm (M, 105k, wangxian, modern, fantasy, reality tv, angst w/ happy ending, survival, blood & gore, self-harm, animal death, slow burn) this might count?

The Edge of Night by Hobbsy3 (M, 277k, WangXian, XuanLi, Modern AU, Zombie Apocalypse, Yúnmèng Siblings Dynamics, Accidental Baby Acquisition During a Zombie Apocalypse, Junior Quartet, (except they’re all babies), Angst with a Happy Ending, Minor Character Death, Hurt/Comfort, Blood and Gore, Ensemble Cast, Worst Zombie Fighting Team Ever, Found Family)

In The Dark Right Now by phnelt (T, 10k, wangxian, JC & LWJ, WWX & JC, graphic depictions of injuries, trapped in a cave, Near Death Experience, fatalistic thinking, established wangxian, Family Feels, mention of unnamed illness of an offscreen character, Nobody dies in this fic, Modern Setting, JC and WWX are caved in and LWJ talks to them through the radio, Hurt/Comfort)

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7. itmf (self indulgent) wwx appreciation fic. have a good day.

Simping over WWX is my fave hobby Series by brrrrrRawr (T, 10k, WangXian, WWX's original body, Fluff, Pet Name,s Blushing, No Smut, Genius WWX, yunmeng bros reconciliation, endgame lotus pier, big bro wwx rights, also dad wwx rights, BAMF WWX, Bad Writing, Body Dysphoria So OOC, world building, cliff diving, corpse wrestling, OOC, Canon Divergence, god WWX, god WN, god WQ, child JL, teenager MXY, xuanli get resurrected, rip nmj tho, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, BAMF WWX, BAMF WN, BAMF WQ)

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8. papa-zhan fics please! a-yuan/sizhui calling him dad, a-die, baba, whatever. canon world or modern anything, just some baba lan wangji softness.

🧡 Yiling Salon: Hair, Nails and Piercing by TriviasFolly (T, 22k, WangXian, Modern AU, hairstylist AU, WWX owns a salon, Hairstylist WWX, 5+1 Things, Fluff, Experimental Style)

🧡 paint smears on sunny days by SnowshadowAO3 (E, 53k, WangXian, Comfort, Fluff and Smut, Everyone Is Alive, Modern AU, Dadji, Mutual Pining, Happy Ending, Brief Alcohol Mention, Masturbation, Blow Jobs, Hand Jobs, Accidentally co-parenting with your son's art teacher, Fatherhood)

When You Wake, 怎能当梦一场 by acertainrogue (T, 39k, WangXian, WWX is in a coma, Angst with a Happy Ending, Modern AU, Single Dad LWJ, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Parenthood, YZY's A+ Parenting, JFM's A+ parenting, wangxian family) mind the tags pls

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9. hello! it is me that animal-whisperer lwj fic anon! thank you for recommending that, it was such a good read..

would it be fine to ask more of that kind? i cannot seem to get enough of that trope.

🧡 A Study in Fluff by WeaverOfTheNight (T, 29k, WangXian, Modern AU, Ghost bunnies, Vet LWJ, Architect WWX, Kid LSZ, Domestic fluff, Modern with Magic)

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10. This is more of a recommendation ask, does anyone know of any good canon compliant post last chapter fics? basically just more of lwj and wwx and the juniors etc just living their lives like the iron hook extra in the novels? Basically just any very canon post story stories people made i can’t get over the last chapter it was so cute with the lotuses and tipped boat help Sorry if that doesn’t really make sense THABK YOU TUMBLR!!!!!! @kaleajakic

🔒do not go gentle by RoseThorne (G, 684, WN & WQ, WN & WWX, LSZ & WQ, Canonical Character Death, Spirits, Ghosts, LWJ Plays Inquiry, Song: Inquiry, Protectiveness, Grief/Mourning, Love, Acceptance, Family, Angst, Post-Canon, POV Third Person, POV WN)

A More Practical Approach by Elhana (T,9k, WangXian, Canon Compliant Teacher WWX, Humour, POV Multiple, Implied Sexual Content, WWX is resourceful, wuxia magic shenanigans, Based on a Tumblr Post, Post-Canon)

It takes courage to pet a dog. by nenufares (T, 10k, WangXian, Post-Canon, a bit of canon-typical violence, past animal abandonment, Dogs, Fluff and Humor, Mild Hurt/Comfort) I'm not sure if they really count but they are post canon and I enjoyed reading them!

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11. itmf fic where wwx is cultivating the ghostly path like in the novel. i'd like recs for a cultivation that's more a compassion/empathy-based collaboration that results in the liberation of the resentful dead not an antihero necromancer forcing the dead to do his will for the greater good. thanks ❤️🩵

🔒 the thread may stretch or tangle but it will never break by RoseThorne (E, 91k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Soulmates, Self-Esteem Issues, Fix-It, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, PTSD, Handfasting, Panic Attacks, Getting Together, First Time, Aftercare, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, /Referenced Torture, Scars, Chronic Pain, Golden Core Reveal, First Time, Switching, sex-related injury, LWJ Stays at the Burial Mounds, LSZ is a Wèi, Good Sibling JC, Dissociation, Burial Mounds Settlement Days)

A Life Without Regrets by naqaashi (M, 74k, wangxian, JFM & WWX, JC & WWX, WRH & WWX, LXC & LWJ, LQR & LWJ, LWJ & NHS, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, Angst and Humor, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Crack Treated Seriously, musical cultivation, Slow Burn, Pining, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Murder Husbands, PTSD, BAMF WWX, Demonic Cultivation, POV WWX, Cultivation Sect Politics, Worldbuilding, No Yīn Iron, Genius WWX, Inventor WWX, Artist WWX, Musician WWX, Night Hunts, Fate & Destiny, Bad Parent JFM & YZY, Golden Core, Cultivation Theory, Sentient Burial Mounds, Father-Son Relationship, Dysfunctional Family, Grief/Mourning, Parent-Child Relationship, Angry WWX, Pining WWX, WWX is Not Okay, No Golden Core Transfer, BAMF LWJ, Pining LWJ, POV LWJ, Angry LWJ, One-Braincell Wangxian, Love Confessions, Idiots in Love, WIP)

Ad Oblivione by Baph, HikariNoHimeWriter (M, 70k, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, Temporary Character Death, Canon-Typical Violence, POV Multiple, Hurt/Comfort, Grief/Mourning, Identity Reveal, Golden Core Reveal, Cultivation World Critical, Not JC Friendly, Abusive YZY, Angst with a Happy Ending)

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12. Hi! I was just wondering if you have any good, longer fluff pieces. They can have plot, but in general everyone is happy and no one gets hurt (unless it’s jgs). I know canon makes it a bit more difficult, but if you have any recs, that would be great! I’m just looking for fluff, humor, and plot

Thank you!

how to fall in love with a catfish: a guide by wei wuxian (disaster rat) by bwyn, Yuisaki (T, 54k, WangXian, Modern AU, College/University, Actors, Multimedia, Online Friendship, Drunken Shenanigans, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Underage Drinking, Drinking Games, Families of Choice, Ensemble Cast, Fluff and Angst, Slow Burn, Catfish AU) there's a bit of angst here

Meet Me Friday At Seven by craftyTrickster (luoxiaobai) (E, 128k, wangxian, modern, Fluff, Meet-Cute, Friends to Lovers, Blind Date, lots of texting, almost a chat fic, WC and WLJ aren’t evil but they are annoying, Kissing, Masturbation, Anal Sex, romantic sex, Bi WWX, bi nhs, Single Parent WWX, Slow Burn, Unreliable Narrator) just pure fluff

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13. Hi! I am looking for canon-divergent fics where people think WWX dies but he actually doesn’t? I then want a big reveal when people realize he is still alive/never actually died. Thank you so much!

ahhh I just sent in an itmf ask about WWX dying but not really? I meant to specify that I want him to be "dead" for a long period of time, not just a brief gimmick. Long enough that people mourn him or move on, and then he comes back years later like in canon. Thanks, and sorry for not putting this in the first ask!

🔒Brotherhood by LtLJ (G, 10k, JC & WWX, CQL canon, Canon Divergence, Yunmeng Brothers Reconciliation, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon-Typical Violence, BAMF WWX, BAMF JC, breaks from canon during the time skip, YLLZ WWX)

WWX and JYL run away by shanastoryteller (WangXian, XuanLi, JYL and JZX lives, JYL and WWX raise JL and LSZ, Fake Character Death)

Something From Nothing by sami (E, 55k, WangXian, XianLi, Minor QingLi, XiCheng, Canonical Character Death, Canonical Character Resurrection, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon Divergence, Assassin's Creed Fusion, Kinda, Assassin's Creed Vibes, Wangxian is endgame, Slow Burn, specifically for wangxian, no infidelity, no partner betrayal, Angst with a Happy Ending) This has canon divergence and wwx being dead long enough for people to move on plus hey he's alive reveal but not exactly the way requester described

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14. hii! I'm sorry to bother you! i was hoping you could rec me some dark lwj, or dark gusu lan fics? them being more manipulative or possessive? thank you so much in advance<3

A Matter of Time by mrcformoso (M, 40k, wangxian, time travel fix-it, graphic depictions of violence, underage, LWJ pov, JC pov, dark LWJ, manipulation, grooming, teen body adult mind for LWJ, happy ending for wangxian, problematic consensual underage sex, blood & violence, insane LWJ, manic LWJ)

~*~

15. hello!!! hehe would just like to ask if you have any fics where lsz is referenced as the lan heir? thank you! 💕

anyway, here's wuji by kakikaeru (T, 18k, ZhuiYi, WangXian, LingZhen, Post-Canon)

❤️ A Civil Combpaign by Ariaste (M, 12k, zhuiling, wangxian, arranged marriage, combs, courting, awkward teenagers, teenage drama, humor, feelings, fluff)

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16. Heyy ! I am in the mood for your favourite nightmares fic (Wangxian if possible). Thxx ! @sebyyw

#FreePalestine | hold me close by gentil-minou (Flyingsuits) (E, 13k, WangXian, Post-Canon, Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Established Relationship, Porn with Feelings, Emotional Sex, Grief, Mental Health Issues, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, tender husbands being tender, Character Study, Masturbation, Oral Sex ,Anal Sex, Working Through Grief With Sex, Grieving Your Husband While Fucking Him, Depressed LWJ) I'm not sure if this is what you're looking for but lwj has a nightmare in one scene in my fic here

hunters seeking solid ground by Attila (E, 23k, wangxian, Canon Compliant, discussion of canon character death, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, bed sharing, Getting Together, Yearning, Literal Sleeping Together, Really Excessive Amounts of Hurt/Comfort)

Feathers On My Breath by Sweetlittlevampire (T, 3k, wangxian, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, Teen Crush, Pre-Relationship, Panic Attacks, LWJ Has A Panic Attack, Nightmare, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Past Character Death, Mentions of Dying Linked To The Panic Attack, Sharing a Bed)

a needle, a whisper, an insidious dream by pale_and_tragic (M, 19k, wangxian, WWX & WQ & LWJ, post-canon, fix-it of sorts, case fic, horror elements, nightmares, hallucinations, pining, hurt LWJ, aroace WQ, platonic relationships, suicidal thoughts, angst w/ happy ending, hurt/comfort, sleeping beauty)

~*~

17. Me again, back to pester you all w/ an ITMF ask! Thank you so much for all you do! I have read (and re-read) An Elegant Solution and also Things to Do with a Flute During Wartime, and they have put me in the mood for NMJ-centric stories where he is a fully robust, complex, interesting character. Any ship is okay, and modern AUs welcome, but pref. no MCD. <;3 @kimboo-york

🔒 Audience of One by WinterDreams (T, 181k, XiCheng, WangXian, XuanLi, mentioned SongXiao, implied MingYao, Modern AU, Celebrities, Inspired by 10 Things I Hate About You (1999), Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Singer LXC, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Everyone Needs A Hug, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Swearing, Slow Burn, Family Feels, Family Bonding, childhood crushes, past emotional abuse, Post-Betrayal, Venerated Triad Feels, Yunmeng Duo Feels, Nightmares, Fluff and Angst, hand holding, Babysitter Ā-Qìng, Domestic Fluff, Soft XiCheng, Eventual Happy Ending)

🔒 shades of grey spill from my veins (bleeding ink all over the page) by Reverie (cl410) (M, 58k, LXC/NMJ, wangxian, NHS/WN, POV NMJ, Canon Divergence, WWX raised by the Nie Sec, Mentions of WWX's life on the streets, Hurt/Comfort, Accidental Sibling Acquisition, Single Dad NMJ, NHS & WWX Friendship, Fluff, Humor, Happy Ending, Everyone Lives AU, Protective NMJ, a plot showed up, Sunshot Campaign, Some angst, Blood and Injury, Kidnapping, Protective Siblings, Found Family) more canon

found in translation by sysrae (E, 12k, LXC/NMJ, wangxian, Modern Cultivation, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks, my extremely justified hatred of LQR, Meddling brothers, Coming Out, Loss of Virginity, Under-negotiated Kink, slight breathplay, Light Dom/sub, Aftercare, Angst with a Happy Ending) a modern AU

~*~

If you didn’t get an answer to your ask here, don’t forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesn’t have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - it’s all good!***

#wangxian #mdzs #wangxian fic recs #i'm in the mood for a fic #the untamed #wangxian fic search #wangxianficfinder #long post

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elf-osamu · 11 months

Text

“AZUL, JADE AND FLOYD WITH A S/O WHO IS SCARED OF THE SEA”

[ masterlist ] [ reblogs are very appreciated ]

hurt/comfort ig, romantic, azul ashengrotto, jade leech, floyd leech (separately) x gn!reader

warning(s) : slight book 3 spoilers in azul’s (only in the first paragraph) !!!!, the reader has an anxiety attack but in floyd’s it’s not described with many details, perhaps a bit ooc but honestly i’m not really sure abt it, not proofread

word count : 1411 words

plot : “you’re scared of the sea, but you haven’t said anything about it to your boyfriend because you don’t want him to take it personally. how does he discover it? how does he support and reassure you?”

a/n : very self-indulgent prompt because i get very scared when i see/think about the marine depths for various reasons, so here you go :) <3. i just wanna remind y’all that everyone’s experience can be different, this is mostly inspired by mine !!

AZUL ASHENGROTTO

[ ☆ ] he has come to terms with his past self, but his insecurities still linger to his mind from time to time — he only brings up some aspects of his previous way of living, usually things that have to do with business.

[ ☆ ] so i’d say he wouldn’t talk about it as much as the other two do !

[ ☆ ] still, since he’s the housewarden of octavinelle, everything is very much sea-related in his dorm.

[ ☆ ] rooms, hallways, the mostro lounge… everything.

[ ☆ ] and, since you’re azul’s partner, he trusts you with some of his projects. certain people are fascinated by marine depths, so he would probably host events or re-arrange the mostro lounge with decorations inspired by those.

[ ☆ ] although he could be quite busy because of his schedule and complicated matters, azul is an extremely observant person, no detail escapes him.

[ ☆ ] he would notice quite rapidly if something bothers you, unless you hide it pretty well. but, even in that case, something would give it away, from a worried expression to slight trembling to just not communicate much when he or someone is talking about said topic.

[ ☆ ] azul is probably suggesting a new idea for octavinelle’s restaurant, about the darkest places you could find in the ocean — he’s thinking about changing the walls decor with posters of mysterious creatures and frightening images — when you just start to space out, blocking outside’s noises and his voice.

[ ☆ ] you’re not particularly aware of this action of yours, you don’t mean to ignore him, but the fear has set in and you can’t focus on something except depths and depths of dark water.

[ ☆ ] azul would immediately notice how your body is stiff and your mind seems to be elsewhere; he would waste no time in taking you to a quiet place.

[ ☆ ] when you feel better and explain why it happened, he’s

[ ☆ ] he’s very mindful about this topic with you around! after all, he remembers all the secrets, weaknesses and strenghts of his clients, so it’s not a problem for him to keep your needs in mind, it’s quite the opposite.

[ ☆ ] he would stop holding events with things related to your fear, or he would warn you beforehand.

[ ☆ ] he isn’t fond of swimming, but he would make sure to be by your side if you want to see ocean documentaries or read about sea depths.

JADE LEECH

[ ☆ ] he loves to learn about the customs people follow on land or about nature, especially mushrooms, as we are aware of. so, since your world has piqued his interest, he doesn’t bring up his life in the deep waters on a daily basis.

[ ☆ ] however, with jade the problem rises when he makes comparisons between twisted wonderland’s customs and the ones in the dark depths of the sea.

[ ☆ ] he can be extremely accurate when it comes to describing his experiences and the creatures he met when he was younger, making you shiver in fear when he explains the darkness of some places.

[ ☆ ] at first he is too immersed in his story-telling to see your reaction.

[ ☆ ] but after you two enter a new stage of your relationship, being used to floyd’s frequent mood changes (he’s very perceptive after all), it doesn’t go unnoticed when you hold your breath, shake your head or close your eyes to not think about those scenarios.

[ ☆ ] he would ask you if there’s something wrong and, since you deny it, he doesn’t say anything else on the matter.

[ ☆ ] however, he’ll observe you more than usual and wonder what you’re hiding from him.

[ ☆ ] it doesn’t take him long before he grasps the reality of the situation — he prefers not to say anything though, because he wants you to feel comfortable enough to share it with him.

[ ☆ ] he proceeds to talk about how his life was before he was chosen to be a student of NRC less and less in detail, and he notices the way you see, more relaxed.

[ ☆ ] until one day, you’re in your biology class with jade and the professor chooses to talk about marine life, showing pictures and accurate descriptions of certain places.

[ ☆ ] upon noticing your discomfort, he’ll excuse you and himself, taking you outside the classroom because “[name] needs to go to the infirmary and it’s necessary to accompany them there”.

[ ☆ ] once you tell jade about your fear and the reason you hid it, he listens very attentively and gets it.

[ ☆ ] “dear, you have nothing to worry about; in the sea there are many creatures that are terrified of what could possibly be waiting for them on land, so i don’t find it hard to understand where you’re coming from”, he smiles fondly. “next time, would you mind telling me about something that bothers you straight away? so i could better prevent anything which may trigger you?”

[ ☆ ] he’s very gentle about it!! he’ll ask you what exactly he has to avoid and if he can do anything to better support you.

[ ☆ ] if, after a while, you want to “test” yourself and try to swim in the sea/watch something related to sea life, he’ll be there for you! <3.

FLOYD LEECH

[ ☆ ] among the octavinelle trio, he would be the most blunt about it.

[ ☆ ] no waiting, no schemes, he would go directly to you and ask if something is wrong.

[ ☆ ] how would he notice it?

[ ☆ ] well, when floyd is interested in someone or something, he’s very loud and open about it; with you being his significant other, he spends a big amount of time with you.

[ ☆ ] he easily catches up on some of your habits and little facts about yourself just by watching what you do, he’s very attentive when he’s motivated to do so.

[ ☆ ] he adores to swim when he’s in the mood to do so. it can be both relaxing and exciting: it’s something that often vitalizes him, making him think more clearly and calm him down when he’s upset.

[ ☆ ] if you refuse to go in the sea with him, he would slightly complain the first times, as he usually does when he doesn’t obtain what he wants.

[ ☆ ] it’s only a bit of whining though, floyd would never force you into doing something you’d rather not.

[ ☆ ] when people around him and he’s bored, he passionately tells scary stories about his childhood and the creatures he has met during that time; he mostly entertains himself by exaggerating and adding unnecessary details, but he’s always satisfied with himself when he manages to scare someone.

[ ☆ ] but if that someone is you? things are a bit different.

[ ☆ ] he becomes aware of your fear almost immediately after noticing how you’re quiet when he’s in the middle of explaining how a huge monster tried to attack him once and he couldn’t see anything since it was quite dark there; you haven’t said anything in a while and you look bothered but also… truly frightened.

[ ☆ ] floyd has demonstrated multiple times how he’s quick-witted; thinking about all the times he was storytelling or just suggested to go in the dark marine depths, he has no doubts about it.

[ ☆ ] “[name]”, he says in a slurred tone, his eyes are looking for yours. “you’re scared of the sea, aren’t you?”.

[ ☆ ] when you admit your fear, explaining why you thought it was better to keep it a secret, he frowns. then he proceeds to gently hold your jaw in one hand and place the other on your shoulder.

[ ☆ ] “i don’t judge [name]. has someone done it? who are they? should i squeeze them?”.

[ ☆ ] he’s really caring when it comes to people who are close to him! so you can feel totally safe with him on your side.

[ ☆ ] if you ever wanna try to do something related to your fear, he’d be 100% excited and supportive about it.

[ do not copy, translate, repost, etc. | by @ elf-osamu ]

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agroupiewhore · 4 months

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Some random headcanons about what it would be like to date Fran. I haven't wrote anything in ages so apologies if this is shite. Please no hate. 💗💖🍓💕❤️🎀

*Disclaimer: This is my own work and my own self-indulgent ideas, none of this is based in reality.

If anyone wants a part 2 please let me know or has any questions or suggestions for improvements then please let me know, I apologise in advance for spelling and grammar errors.

🎀 This man can cook. He is amazing in the kitchen, will make you whatever you fancy no matter what time it is or whatever you fancy, nothing is too much trouble for him. Cooking you something is his love language.

🎀 He would much rather read then watch something. On the evenings you spend together you're sat on the sofa together reading. He will also read aloud to help you fall asleep.

🎀 No matter what the time is this man will come and pick you up. "But babe, I'm probably gonna be staying out till like 3am" "Ok mi amor, I come get you then" "But aren't you due on set at like 5:30am?" "Yes, and? I come pick you up at 3, I love you."

🎀 Will pay attention to all the little things that you like and remembers them so he can surprise you later on.

🎀 Never ever puts you down or makes fun of you when you're practicing Spanish with him and vice versa for when he is talking with you.

🎀 100% that annoying couple which never seem to argue. Just a walking disney film. The guys all tease him about it. "But you must argue over something, anything!?" "No, nothing" "I bet he leaves the toilet seat up" "No, always puts it down"

🎀 Believes in the art of letter writing and writes you letters in that fancy calligraphy writing. (Something he learned for a part in a theatre production)

Here is a small imagine, no TW etc, a little bit of making out etc, pg/13

A surprise

"My love" Fran said as he wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you closer. "I can finish the dishes, it's ok".

"No I got it" you said as you began drying off some of the plates. "Besides you must be tired after yesterday's wrap party".

"It was fun, you need to come to the next one" he said as he brushed your hair aside to kiss your neck softly. "I missed you alot, the others were asking for you".

"I'll be at the next one babe, I promise" you answered setting the plate down and turning to face him. Fran was beautiful and you couldn't believe how lucky you were. You wrapped your arms around him and rested your forehead against his. "I think you need a second helping of that dessert you made. You need it". Fran smirked and kissed your nose.

"I said you don't need to ever worry about me. I promise, I'm going to be ok" he answered.

"Oh I got you something, to celebrate the film being done" you said going to pull away.

"No wait, just one more second, I want to stay like this forever with you" he said enjoying the moment, he felt he could be anywhere in the world but as long as he was with you he was home. You smiled and held onto him a little tighter.

"You did not have to get me something. I already have everything I need, I'm very lucky like that you know. Can carry everything I'll ever need in my hands" he smirked as he picked you up, catching you off guard.

"Fran!" You laughed as you instinctively wrapped your legs around his waist. "O my gosh put me down, I need to go and get your present". You looked down into his beautiful deep eyed and cupped his cheeks and began kissing him. He had the softest lips and skin. He kissed you deeper savouring the taste of your peach flavoured lip balm. Peaches were his favourite fruit. A fact you'd noted quite early on. You remembered the look of surprise and satisfaction on his face the day he'd realised your lip balm was the same flavour as his favourite fruit.

"Fran... I need... to get... your gift" you said between kisses. "Please mi amor". Fran smiled against your neck, there was something extremely hot about you using Spanish pet names for him. He was so in love with you it was unreal.

"Just one more my dear, please" he begged staring up at you. How could you say no to him? You lent down and kissed him, twice though. It was a small little ritual the two of you had. He would always ask for one more kiss whether it was before going off to sleep, before he would leave for set or an audition or before going on stage. You always kissed him twice just to be safe. He gently set you down and stroked your cheek.

"Te amo, mi amor" he smiled.

"I love you more" you answered before squeezing his hand and leaving. He heard you going upstairs and into the second bedroom. He was excited at the prospect of seeing what you'd got him although he was more excited to see your face at his gift for you. He smiled wider as he placed his hand into his trousers pocket and felt the box with an engagement ring inside.

#lsdln #the society of the snow #francisco romero #franciso romero imagine #x reader

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prince-liest · 11 months

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more self-indulgent jgy abo headcanons

I read a fic so long ago that I no longer remember the fandom nor characters involved, but the thing about it that really stuck in my mind was that it was an abo-verse fic that used the concept that omegas have an ingrained biological need for physical (including platonic) affection, to the point where “touch-starvation” was a medical diagnosis

this is obviously extremely up my alley for ALL my blorbos, but consider jin guangyao in particular:

unlike the usual ‘omega pretending to be a beta’ trope, I think that once he is established at jinlintai, he would not really try to let people assume that he’s a beta. being an omega leads people not only into underestimating him, but also into offering him a certain degree of safety in providing a veil of stereotype-associated demureness, placidity, etc. it is more to his benefit for people to see him as a polite young man, perhaps even one who, yes, is a war hero - but people can’t quite imagine what kinds of things he must have done for that. surely nothing too bad.

but at the same time, this is the character who couldn't even serve tea to people as nie mingjue’s deputy without people making a show of wiping off their fingers after touching the cups. people know he is an omega, people judge him for being an omega on top of all the other things he is already judged for, but I suspect that most of the relevant and appropriate people in jinlintai avoid touching him unless absolutely necessary. in a world where casual contact is thoroughly commonplace just due to the socialities set up by their biology, jin guangyao has a personal space bubble of like 2-3 feet because he's the dirty son of a prostitute.

he walks through the halls, ostensibly the second young master of the tower, and feels like he is drowning in the physical manifestation of loneliness.

who does he have left? family? jin zixuan is not close to him, and frankly is likely an alpha raised by alphas to whom it would not even occur to that such needs need to be minded. jin guangshan certainly is aware, but is using it as leverage, allowing and denying contact as he see fits to manipulate jin guangyao the same way he does with his fatherly affection. there are his sworn brothers, but his relationship with nie mingjue is fraught: certainly da-ge wouldn’t withhold contact as punishment or leverage, but that doesn’t mean he wants to touch jin guangyao anymore, nor does he really understand how the necessity of it feels when he grew up with nie huaisang, an omega who has never been shy about taking whatever affection he wants. and er-ge... he just isn’t around enough.

lan xichen is still the best option, and by the time they have the opportunities to see each other, jin guangyao is pressing nails into his palms to stop from just plastering himself up against lan xichen’s side, which surely would be humiliating for both of them. but still, he’s so aware of it any time they’re in the same room, meting out as many small touches as he can get away with without embarrassing himself. lan xichen slips his fingers over jin guangyao’s wrists as he pulls him up from a bow, intending warm affection. jin guangyao doesn’t want to let him know that it feels like being allowed to gasp for a single breath of air before his head is shoved back underwater.

(with nie mingjue, it is worse. da-ge is just as aware as jin guangyao is when they touch, but for all the worst reasons.)

it is the strangest blessing whenever jin guangyao sees nie huaisang. it’s embarrassing, a little - the knowledge that nie huaisang understands, unlike most people in jin guangyao’s life. but nie huaisang takes that embarrassment onto his own self willingly, never hesitating before making a fool of himself in the way that only a terminally younger brother can, and simply flinging himself into his san-ge’s arms. it’s nostalgic, too: nie mingjue isn’t quite so aware of how important touch is with how proactive nie huaisang can be, and so during his days as deputy, it was often nie huaisang who gave meng yao what he could not ask for.

the cultivators at jinlintai look down on him just as the ones in the unclean realm did, but now there is no willing young master to soothe away the tangible, physical ache of it. more often than not, jin guangyao tucks his hands into his sleeves to hide the way his fingertips shake.

anyway this is my petition for jiang yanli to take two looks at this situation and promptly wrinkle her brows just the slightest amount, expressing quiet concern to jin zixuan that it’s strange how she doesn’t see anybody touch his half-brother very much, does she? and jin zixuan is a little confused, a little embarrassed, a little off-balance - he doesn’t feel close enough to jin guangyao to be that casual, but he’s an alpha, he doesn’t get it until jiang yanli explains to him, with a beta’s patience, the value of family bonds to an omega as well as jin zixuan’s responsibility as a brother (older brother? younger? his father claims older, but there’s no way to truly know - ), and isn’t it wonderful, having a little brother?

and then someone pats jin guangyao over the head until he’s feeling a little less strung-thin and out of options, he realizes he has to keep jin zixuan and jiang yanli alive lest he actually lose his mind (sympathy for da-ge? oh no...), and etc etc things end happily ever after, the end, QED.

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vasito-de-leche · 6 months

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;R1999 FORGET ME NOT - General Headcanons

Compilation of headcanons and analysis on Forget Me Not as a character and other related things.

this post was brought to you by me, procrastinating on the second part of the Cover analysis and those yandere Pavia headcanons, and ALSO because mister lawrence cavendish jr is the second target for my brainrot

warning for suicide and self-harm themes!

On the subject of Forget Me Not's name and past.

It's Lawrence Cavendish Jr. Forget Me Not's real name is confirmed to be just that, as seen in this specific excerpt:

"Cavendish Jr, who was still alive and once sat in front of you [...]" which alludes to the dinner Vertin had at the Walden with Druvis III and Forget Me Not, and "'Forget Me Not', what a hilarious, stupid name". I only included this because I've seen people wonder about it.

What I mean to tackle in this point is the relationship between Forget Me Not, his origins and his current chosen name. Despite his calm and collected appearance, it becomes clear that Forget Me Not is one hair away from becoming entirely deranged, especially when confronted with the possibility of getting revenge. But why is Forget Me Not so focused on revenge specifically?

His backstory is not as openly laid out for us to read, but we can gleam some bits and pieces from all the documents and dialogue he has. To understand Forget Me Not, we also need to look at Druvis III.

All throughout chapter 02, we see parallels and connections being drawn between Forget Me Not and Druvis III - both of them appear to be extremely aloof, cold and collected, only to be revealed to be very emotional deep down, for better and for worse. Druvis III is initially defined by the neutrality and inertia that comes with being stuck in the past, while Forget Me Not is initially defined by the neutrality of the Walden and his ties with Manus Vindictae, an organization that rejects the future.

Druvis III is a disgraced, fallen noble whose life wasn't ruined by the fire that took her family, but the perception the world had of her, an image they forced onto her due to their hatred towards arcanists. And Forget Me Not has a family surname "buried in the dust, shot dead in history". A disgraced, fallen noble implied to have struggled with poverty, battling hunger and suicide countless of times. In the "··· Formula: 1920s" document, we can see a few pieces from various people and their opinions on Forget Me Not from the Big Mouth Bulletin. 3 out of 4 want him dead or think of him as a monster - entirely because of his existence as an arcanist.

The similarities are obvious. Hell, both share the theme of flora and plants, too. There is an even more subtle dynamic here too, alluding to the game's prominent religious imagery - Vertin's suitcase being compared to an ark that will brave the "Storm", the last supper moment, Arcana's offering, the orange, being a replacement for the apple of Eden...

And then, Forget Me Not association with snakes, rumoured to have a body covered in scales, with an arcanum skill that allows people to indulge in alcohol during the Prohibition Era - the snake that tempted Adam and Eve. Druvis III is associated with forests, trees, as well as a link between Vertin (the good guys) and Manus Vindictae (the bad guys) - the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil. The two go hand in hand and are linked together.

The big difference between them is that their respective quests to set things "right" are entirely different - their "revenge" is not the same. Druvis III was hellbent on finding out who set the fire that killed her family, not because she wanted them to face the consequences, but because in doing so, people would finally leave her alone and let her mourn. She could finally move on from something that she knew the truth of. Forget Me Not does it to feel satisfied with himself and get back at everyone who ever looked down on him or wronged him. To inflict as much as pain unto others as he had received before. It's a powerplay fantasy in which he finally wins, against all odds.

It's unclear what truly happened to the Cavendish that caused Forget Me Not to end up in such conditions, to the point where he'd go as far as make sure no one can trace him back to his family, to the point where not even the Foundation has a proper report on him.

But there is one line in particular that lives rent free in my head when it comes to the Cavendish and Forget Me Not's potential relationship with them.

This takes place after Druvis III loses her forest, after she loses her eternal branch because of Vertin's intervention during their dinner. They're talking about how to use her forest to build a refugee camp.

There's the possibility that Forget Me Not is simply alluding to that forest - something that used to belong to her is now something that he should have for the sake of Manus Vindictae's goals.

But! Indulge me for a second! There's a noticeable pause, there's a subtle tone to his voice. Reverse 1999's writing might be confusing at times due to the translation, but it's easy to see that it's loaded with metaphors, hidden meanings and so much more, to the point where reading deeply into everything most characters' say is pretty much the norm.

The dialogue that precedes that specific line is Forget Me Not insisting that he can transfer the ownership of the woods over to Druvis III anytime, because she has always been and will always be the only owner, no matter what. He does this to convince her to go through with Manus' plans, that's his main goal, he doesn't care about the woods. But that single line pictured above? It could mean so much more.

Again, the two share many, many similarities. So when Forget Me Not talks about what Druvis III once had - a prestigious family business, a name people can recognize, an assured future - is what he should have, it evokes a sense of entitlement and lingering resentment. Almost as if Forget Me Not's desire to go back to the past doesn't stem from nostalgia like her, but to reclaim something that was denied to him.

Which is incredibly ironic to me because both of them carried their family in their names - Druvis THE THIRD. Lawrence Cavendish JUNIOR. And yet, the one that worked so hard to obscure his origins and changed his family name was him.

Neither of these characters can be recognized nor traced back to their families by appearance alone - people need a name or a really good memory to truly recognize them. The only one with enough courage to continue carrying such burden is Druvis III. Forget Me Not wants something that he willingy lost the right to the moment he allowed Lawrence Cavendish Jr. to die and fade into obscurity.

The name "Forget Me Not" begins to sound more ironic. Like an order, a threat or the promise of his return - his desire for revenge and his hypocrisy become clear once you begin to dissect his character. Like the narrator in the "To Lawrence Cavendish" document says: "He is patiently waiting... to put his meanness, craziness and quivers under the sun". He's waiting to reveal himself.

The "stage" is shown when he makes people explode from inside out, a lot of people who recognized him as Forget Me Not, the mixologist. This is when we finally see his true intentions and the main difference between him and Druvis III, all in their respective reactions to the journalists.

She's terrified, thinking about the day of her family's funeral. On the other hand, he's ordering them to watch and record as he "takes everything he has been deprived of".

This is why the thing that breaks Forget Me Not is hearing that Druvis III does not care about the man who started the fire, that it's not important anymore. He believed them to be on the same page, that she would love to torture the single person responsible for all of her grief. The guy is projecting heavily onto Druvis III.

In the end, I don't know if Forget Me Not resents his father, his family name, if he had some sort of business to inherit and a "future" that was taken from him, or if they actually might've been a happy family.

What I do know is that Forget Me Not's desire for revenge was absolutely amplified and fueled by Manus Vindictae's own agenda. And that's why he works perfectly as both a victim of their MO and a willing member within their ranks.

He clings so hard to the past because there is no future worth fighting for, because everything would be much better if it was rebuilt from scratch with only those that won't oppose him and repeat history. He clings so hard that his new name and identity are, in the end, a plea for the world not to forget who he used to be and, at worst, an order because he sure as hell hasn't forgotten all the things others have done or said Back when Lawrence Cavendish Jr was around. Once his family outlived their usefulness or relevance within society.

TLDR: THIS is the cold-blooded, numb murderer who is actually very sad, empty and broken deep inside that some people wanted Pavia to be. Like, he's even sopping wet and sad and asking Vertin to kill him next time they meet.

Which leads us to my next point!

On the subject of Forget Me Not's self-destructive and suicidal mindset.

We've talked about Forget Me Not's views and relationship with the Cavendish - but what exactly is the end goal? He feels entitled to a better life, one he was supposed to have, and then what?

The "???" narrator mentions a woman who made a promise to Forget Me Not, as well as leaving a "sarcoma" behind which he then adapted and turned into his own. This woman is implied to be Arcana, as we see her talk to Vertin about being able to see the truth, to not be blinded - there's an emphasis in the way she recruits people by opening their eyes to reality. The sarcoma is the city (apparently "Windy City" is used to refer to Chicago, I had to google that but hey, that's pretty neat!). It's the world he lives in and that wants him gone. She focused Forget Me Not's grief towards it because in doing so, it would help Manus Vindictae's ideals of a world exclusively for pureblooded arcanists.

And even so, he remained suicidal. There was at least one more attempt at taking his own life, and that's when he saw "what had been on his mind". Whatever that might've been, no doubt influenced by Arcana and his situation, is what pushed Forget Me Not to "allow himself to revenge, revenge, re-re-re-revenge, and to die".

Ultimately, Forget Me Not's goal is to die at the end of it all - even after he gets his revenge, earns the life he wanted, takes back everything that was meant for him. This is why, after he's fully defeated, his last words to Vertin are to show no mercy next time they meet. To kill him.

This is not only a long and convoluted plan of revenge, it's Forget Me Not willingly marching into his own demise. And just like before, he's not strong enough to pull the trigger himself. Now that he has no solid argument to justify his anger - all because Druvis III has shown him that people can, in fact, move on - his only option is to have someone else end his life. He's shown tired, and the phrase "Don't save it no more" might indicate that even if there was someone who could repeat what Arcana did to him - give him a sense of purpose and a target for his grief - he simply doesn't have the energy for that.

Forget Me Not's self-destructive tendencies can also be seen in other ways. His job at The Walden is to cater to all the people who shunned him - he welcomes everyone and anyone for the sake of creating a network of secrets, he attends fancy parties and events full of those who call him a drug dealer, Satan's spawn and so much more. And he pretends to be someone else entirely while wishing for others to remember him. He willingly surrounds himself with all the things that hurt him.

His arcanum being related to alcohol is rather poetic to me - since Forget Me Not is said to have spiraled into decadence and into this extreme mindset, it makes sense that his main skill is related to being intoxicated and to drown into something that is largely hated but at the same time, desired and coveted. The Prohibition Era does have a very similar mentality to religion, namely western ideologies - you're meant to openly reject and loathe something, but the constant repression causes you to yearn for it instead. And at some point, this repression can become an addiction in itself, leading some to indulge in it. This loops back to Forget Me Not's association with the snake in the Garden of Eden.

It makes sense to me that he indulges in something so painful, while cohercing others into indulging in forbidden alcohol. That he later uses this very same arcane skill to kill all those people who, in his eyes, represent everything he loathes about the current state of the world. It's like a sarcoma that he now leaves behind, that kills from inside out.

And this is the last time I'll bring up Druvis III in a Forget Me Not post, but notice their choice of flower/plant? She has a mistletoe bouquet - a parasitic and toxic plant which represents positive things such as fertility, life and protection in many different cultures. Forget Me Not has black roses, roses being immediately recognized as one of the most beautiful flowers but, in this context, symbolizing things such as death and rebirth, remembrance, mourning. Their duality, contrast and the "two-faced" aspect is prominent there. And not to get very deep about character design, but Druvis III holds the bouquet very carefully and carries it around with her willingly, whereas the black roses that Forget Me Not wears wrap around his neck not unlike a noose.

To really drive home how Forget Me Not sees himself, here's the description they gave him for his boss fight.

They boil down his character perfectly, to all the little traits that make up his whole emotional baggage.

And to also put more emphasis on how Forget Me Not truly doesn't expect to live and "win" at the end of this whole revenge trip, here's his ultimate - "Heavengazing from Hell". He's fully aware that he's going to be destroyed by his own actions and that the only thing left for him will be to look up at heaven from hell. That all the good things will forever be out of his reach.

Now, onto proper headcanon territory, since I'm running out of media to analyze!

On the subject of Forget Me Not's scales.

As established before, Forget Me Not is associated with snakes - one of the segments from the Big Mouth Bulletin comments on this. "[...] he had scales under those long sleeves, one next to another embedded in his flesh."

And this can actually be seen on his in-game sprite! It's very faint, but there's absolutely some sort of texture peeking out from under his collar and sleeves that resemble scales. They can also be seen on the trailer animations. The only time these scales don't appear or peek out from his clothes are in The Walden illustration, with the other members of Manus Vindictae, but that can easily be explained as him covering up properly and the angle he's drawn in.

Originally I thought that they could be burn scars, as it would mean a stronger connection between him and Druvis III. But upon closer inspection, they don't look like burn scars at all.

I like to headcanon that it's a side-effect from his own arcanum, similar to how Rabies is implied to look like a scarecrow because of his involvement treating rabies. Being something "self-inflicted" - in the sense of him having the choice to stop and heal, but refuses to - also lines up with Forget Me Not's suicidal tendencies, the whole sarcoma metaphor and the fact that by carrying on like this, he's doing nothing but destroy himself and add to his suffering.

As for how far the scales have extended, I don't have a set favorite idea! Part of me really would love it if the scales coiled around his body like actual snakes, but also the idea of him having different patches of scales scattered throughout (again, like a sarcoma) and the third secret option of him being MOSTLY covered in them to the point where it becomes grotesque, something that he can't even look at.

They're not just a tattoo or pattern embedded onto his skin either - they're actual scales, cold and rough to the touch. The areas affected by this have grown numb, making it hard for Forget Me Not to feel any warmth or pressure applied onto them. This adds to that otherworldly and sinister vibe he's got going on, even if the lack of proper tactile sense irritates him. It's extremely uncomfortable if they're brushed or rubbed in the wrong direction, however!

Sometimes, Forget Me Not might pick at the scales, as if deciding whether he loves or hates them. In particularly bad days, he picks them out. I like the idea that, once picked, the scales grow faster and stronger, as well as in broader areas, making it a perpetual loop of picking them off from his skin.

Overall, it would be extremely easy to conceal them - he only needs a shirt with a higher collar and gloves or some make-up, but I like to think that Forget Me Not loves the idea of someone catching a glimpse of them, a reminder that he's dangerous and so much more than meets the eye.

As much as he he's been affected by the stigma against arcanists, he now thrives in their hatred for him and his existence - sneaking into places he knows he's not welcome is addictive, especially knowing everyone tolerates him because he's their only access to alcohol. The way everyone will turn around and talk shit about him once they're out of The Walden is fun, because it reinforces his views on why this current era deserves to be rebuilt from the ground up.

Forget Me Not has extremely poor eyesight.

I know the glasses look thin and pretty standard, but I just like to think that Forget Me Not can't see shit without them.

He has this habit of taking them off to "clean" them whenever he's talking with those he loathes - mostly humans - just so he doesn't have to look at them directly. Sometimes, he might just close his eyes and dissociate, pretending to pay attention if the situation calls for it. Yes, he's petty and hateful enough to feel physically sick when talking to people he hates.

If you pay enough attention, it becomes clear that eye contact becomes scarce, as if just looking at them will send him into a fit of rage (but he conceals it extremely well when needed).

Forget Me Not's poor eyesight is not a secret, and he often likes to make patrons nervous by making their drinks without his glasses - of course, he knows his way around drinks and potions, there's no chance of him messing up, he could do this with his eyes closed. But seeing customers squirm is such a delight. Because now, they must choose between making a scene in HIS territory or risk being poisoned with a poorly-made drink.

I like to think that he also just has a very fine ear, since he does play instruments (all of his attacks being related to music and him using a piano as his wand during the boss fight). So really, Forget Me Not couldn't care less about his eyesight.

Forget Me Not enjoys floral arrangement.

This is just based on his association with the actual forget me not flower. I think he enjoys creating bouquets or putting up vases full of flowers around his home, even if all of them may end up creating a very gloomy and decadent atmospere - they're perfect for funerals, and he simply may be preparing for his own.

And he leaves them out on display long after they've wilted. "They're more beautiful this way", he'd say.

It's not rare to find Forget Me Not on rainy afternoons with a pair of scissors on hand, absentmindedly cutting every leaf and petal off from all these roses, as if he had a personal vendetta against their colorful hues. Sometimes, he just twirls the stem around, pressing hard on the thorns to feel anything while he looks out the window. He's so very fucking dramatic and volatile.

Basically, I like to picture Forget Me Not as the type of person who has dedicated so much time into something as empty as revenge, that he absolutely has no idea what to do outside of that.

Everything he does is just a way to pass the time until he can go back to dedicate every waking second of his life into his and Manus Vindictae's plans, every "little pleasure" is just a façade, he doesn't get any real enjoyment from anything. Sometime he worries that revenge won't help him climb out of this apathetic life he's built for himself, but he can't afford to dwell too much on that possibility. Everything that he does is muscle memory, he's forcing himself to try and do it, because otherwise he could simply sit still in an empty room for hours on end, with the lights turned off, waiting and waiting - all alone with his thoughts.

#reverse 1999 #reverse: 1999 #r1999 #r1999 headcanons #reverse 1999 forget me not #forget me not #playable forget me not WHEN bluepoch i NEED him #i like forget me not when hes like. deranged #when hes one hair away from hurting others or hurting himself because hes. in the most horrible mindset ever #like hes just looking for an excuse to blow up or blow up others (hehehehehe....get it....)#like sure hes so cool with the walden and his network of information and secrets #but hes still a cowardly snake who hides and needs to be revealed. bc he cant reveal himself willingly and openly on his own #its the loss of humanity again but whereas pavia rejects it. FMN just lives within it. he just masks SO well #'but you cant simp for any manus vindictae character! theyre explicitly racists!' and re1999 is a game that CHOSE to replace #actual racial issues in history with their magic ppl vs normal ppl plot line with many many parallels to struggles poc like me lived throug #and then chose to be like 'hey theyre actually physically different and its xenophobia on a whole different species hahaaa bye'#so like. fuckin chew on that first before coming for me. if we're already suspending our belief for the sake of playing:dont cherry pick #tackle the WHOLE thing the game chose to portray. not just a single group within the whole game #sorry if that was heated but lmfao i saw ppl already trying to dictate who ppl can and cannot simp for on twitter #as if this wasnt another fictional anime gacha game at the end of the day

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missrhinedottir · 1 year

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| Heaven’s Name |

Painter!Albedo x Muse!Reader

Warnings: He/Him pronouns for Albedo, No pronouns for reader, afab reader, smut, not sfw, MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, blowjobs, oral sex (reader to albedo), Albedo cums in your mouth whoops, cock riding, love confessions, mutual pining, implied slow burn, very self indulgent but not necessarily selfship, Albedo is very nervous and embarrassed in this <3, reader is implied to be trans masc, reader and Albedo get domestic towards the end, Albedo paints reader, strangers -> friends -> lovers, ass spanking, reader has hair, hair pulling, slight soulmate au, reader is called: sweetheart, good boy, baby; 2.4k words.

A/n: Wow i don’t think I’ve written something this long in SUCH a long time uhh so yeah I went a little overboard haha, but I had SO much fun writing this and I hope y’all love it <3 And if you haven’t read this already, you should be because this is a sequel to that drabble <3

It had been weeks after Albedo had committed his runaway stunt in the midst of a painting session, and it left you wondering, or rather thinking about why, he had run away. He hadn’t left much to mystery, what with how loud he was and all, but you weren’t about to give away his dirty little secret. At least, not yet. Instead you relaxed into the cushions of his bed just as you always did and let out a small breath, trying your best to remain comfortable and still. You looked to the walls that were covered in paintings, mostly of you, but there were also some landscapes, as well. Some familiar and some not.

You reverted your gaze back towards Albedo and the both of you locked eyes, the two of you quickly getting lost in the color of each other’s irises. That’s when you saw how his eyes fluttered, opening and closing at a rapid rate, until you heard the clank of a paintbrush falling against the wooden easel. Trying your best to stifle your giggles you bit your cheek, but it did little to hide your amusement. As much as Albedo wanted to hide in his shame and embarrassment, he just couldn’t. Not when your smile was so beautiful. It set his soul on fire and in response he rubbed the part of his body where his heart lay underneath, hoping it would satiate the burn that was building up in his chest, but it still wouldn’t relieve the tingling feeling spreading throughout his body.

“S-sorry about that. Let’s continue.” He said in a shaky voice.

And so you both did just that, you continued, and as time went on the more nervous and hot the both of you became. You watched as the beads of sweat trailed down his face and neck onto his shirt, and he studied the way you squirmed slightly on the same bed he fantasized you two sharing together. As more time went by it became increasingly hard to avoid the inevitable, and that’s when Albedo was faced with the shameful fact that he was extremely hard at that moment. He went to excuse himself from you when your eyes begged him to stay. Pleading with him to not be afraid to ask for more, be more than just a painter and you his muse.

“I’ll be right back-” He began, but was cut off by your frantic voice. If it weren’t for his own anxiousness he wouldn’t have missed the way your voice trembled when you spoke to him.

You got up and slowly approached him, pressing a gentle palm against his cheek. “Stay. Please?” You asked timidly.

He nodded very slowly and stared at you with half-lidded eyes, and as you leaned in for a passionate kiss his eyes widened. He wasn’t expecting it, but christ did it feel fucking fantastic. It was everything he had always dreamt of and more, like a thousand galaxies were exploding all over his body all at the same exact time. At first he pushed you away slightly, pulling out of your hold and promising this won’t happen again and that he was sorry, swearing he’s not usually like this and that he wasn’t sure why he was acting so out of control, but you silenced him with a smile and a kiss.

“Shh, relax. I want this, too, Albedo. So, please, relax?” You reassured him as you kissed his cheek gingerly.

Finally, he nodded and relaxed his body, allowing you to do whatever would please you most. Both your minds were racing a mile a minute and yet, neither of you stopped for a second even as the what if’s were causing your worlds to spin. Albedo was quiet the entire time aside from the few whimpers and moans that slipped past his lips. Try as he might’ve to suppress his noises, it was inevitable. Your hands roamed his body and it was becoming more and more difficult for Albedo to hide his hard on, but eventually he gave up the fight after your hands grazed the tip of his cock just slightly.

He let out an abrupt gasp, “I’m… I’m sorry. Maybe we should stop.”

You pulled away momentarily to check his expression and was met with his beet red face, and a hand covering his drool stained mouth. It soon became very evident to you that he wasn’t asking to stop because he didn’t enjoy, but rather the complete opposite. He relished in the way your hands touched his body, from his hands up to his arms and then his neck, he couldn’t help but sigh and look at you lovingly when you held his face in your hands.

He was going to say something, a few hopelessly romantic words I’m sure, but his attention was turned towards your words instead. “You say that but…” You paused and leaned in, pressing your lips to his earlobe, “You and I both know how badly you want this.”

He swallowed hard and gripped the arms of the chair he was currently leaning back in. You were right, and a part of him hated that fact, but another part of him couldn’t wait to find out what that meant for the both of you. So, he swallowed hard, again, and grabbed your wrist with his hand which shook, and placed it on his cock which throbbed inside his pants. You were right, he did want this, but he was too nervous to do a thing about it. At least, that’s what it felt like beforehand, but now? Now he couldn't wait to wrap his arms around you and entangle his body with yours.

Keeping your eyes trained on him you lowered yourself on your knees and began to unbutton his pants, slowly pulling out his cock and giving it a few taps on the flat of your tongue. Albedo was already dying to shove you all the way down to the base of his cock, but he resisted. His face burned with desire and already his hips were jerking up into the air for any sort of pleasurable sensation. He tried to stop but he couldn’t, not before you forced his hips down and swallowed his cock whole. Albedo writhed and whined underneath you as you licked your way up and down his shaft. Taking your sweet time you pushed your lips past the thick, red tip of his cock. His tip was throbbing and leaking with precum and with every flick of your tongue and touch of your lips, you could feel Albedo becoming less and less in control.

His hips jerked the more time went on and before you knew it the poor man was pushing you away, again, too caught up in his own pleasure to realize he had already released himself all over your face. Immediately he covered his face in embarrassment and apologized profusely to you, but all you did was laugh.

“You’re cute.” You giggled, and your eyes scrunched closed as you smiled.

Albedo looked away in embarrassment, too bashful to make eye contact with you, but you pulled his head to face you, insisting that he look deep into your eyes. That was the moment that you leaned in for another kiss, taking your time to enjoy the sensation of his lips against yours. He whimpered into the kiss as you climbed on top of him, beginning to remove your bottoms. His breath hitched when you carefully and gently stroked his cock, struggling to catch his breath.

You pulled away for a second to look at him and asked, “You doin’ okay?”

Albedo looked at you with eyes brimming with lust and love, he was ready, more ready than he had anticipated. He nodded and leaned his head against the palm of your hand that was now resting against his face, and gave you a tender smile. Then he placed a hand over yours and opened his eyes, finally speaking.

“Before we continue there’s something I have to confess.” He admitted, his fingers now trembling slightly.

You nodded and he took a big breath before confessing, “I’m– well– I am and have been in love with you for quite some time now, and I thought you deserved to know before we continued.”

Before he could say another word you cut him off with a kiss on the lips, passionately you parted and joined your lips with his as his hands hovered over your hips. Eager to touch you but too scared to, out of some peculiar fear that if he did you would vanish into thin air, but to his shock and amazement you pulled his hands onto your body, pulling him closer as you deepened the kiss. Then you backed out of the kiss to gaze into his glistening eyes.

You smiled and admitted, “I know, and I’m in love with you, too, Albedo.”

“Oh. Oh wow, I had- I had no idea that you felt the same way.” He stammered, too nervous and happy to be his usual reserved self.

“Now…” You began to say as you situated yourself back on top of him, hovering over his cock, “Can we continue? I was really enjoying it before, ya know.” Your face was hot due to embarrassment regardless of the confidence you portrayed in that moment.

Albedo was quiet for a moment out of confusion but then he realized exactly what you meant, and he said, ‘Oh- Oh! Yes, of course we can continue. P-Please do..”

Without hesitation you slid yourself onto his cock with a lewd moan, bracing yourself by gripping onto his shoulders and rode him. Gradually you sped up the pace little by little until the sound of slapping skin echoed in the room. Soon the both of you were a symphony of moans and whimpers, the wet slapping of your bodies enhancing the experience. You allowed your hips to roll against the rhythm of his for a while, until he abruptly took control by turning you on your side and lifting your leg up to gain better access to your cunt.

You whimpered at the sudden change of position and clung to him desperately, gazing deep into his eyes and getting lost in the color of them, again. Those beautiful, turquoise eyes of his captivated you and soon you became just as lost in them as you had with the high of the moment. Your nails dug into his soft back, leaving red marks trailing behind them. Albedo looked at you briefly before leaning in for a passion-filled kiss, his hand slid up to fist your hair as he fucked you rough and hard.

“You’re so beautiful.” He cooed, leaving kisses over every inch of your body that he could reach.

You moaned, “Fuuuuck. I want more, gimme m-more, please, ‘Bedo.”

He grinned mischievously before flipping you onto your stomach. “On your knees.” He demanded and you did just that. Once you were on your knees he pressed the flat of his hand on your back, bracing himself as he slid inside of you with ease. You were soaking wet and already begging for more with only your body, but Albedo wanted to hear those begs from your very own lips, and so he was determined to do just that.

“You’re very wet, sweetheart. You've wanted this for a long time, haven’t you?” He asked, all too pleased with the reaction he’d gotten from you.

You nodded quietly, trying not to say a word except for the whiny ‘Mhmmm’ that you hummed accidentally. Albedo wasn’t pleased with your response and spanked you lightly on the ass just once.

“I’m sorry, I couldn’t hear you. Could you please repeat that?” He asked calmly.

You gave in and started to beg, “Y-yes I have… Please, keep going, Albedo.”

He smiled, “That’s my good boy.”

Without warning Albedo began to fuck you fervently and without remorse, you’d never seen this side of him before. It was like the painter you’d always had an eye for was someone entirely different when it was just the two of you, and as much as you supposed you should’ve found that alarming, you didn’t. In fact it was the opposite, you loved it. Like you got to see a special side of him that was kept secret save for you.

Albedo rolled his hips at a fast and hard pace, hitting that sweet spot of yours perfectly every time. He was comparable to an archon –or what you at least imagined that pure bliss to be like– but better. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head each time his pelvis slapped against your ass. Oh, it was pure heaven, but you were disappointed when your high had come around so early. Thankfully, for you he wasn’t done just yet.

“You’re doing such a good job, taking me so well, baby.” He praised you, stroking your hip gently with his thumbs.

“Can you do one more for me? Just one more and then we can take a break?” He pleaded, nearly begging you for more. In his own reserved way, of course.

For the next few hours you two shared a bed filled with moments of bliss and pure euphoria, ripping release after release from both of your bodies. You lost count of the many times he had made you cum and vice versa, and the moment your head rested against the pillow afterwards you were fast asleep, but that didn’t erase the bliss buzzing throughout your entire body. Even in your sleep your body remembered what it felt like to be loved and ravaged, truly and passionately. And while you were fast asleep, Albedo took that as the perfect opportunity to paint you in your most peaceful state.

This time he took all the time in the world, smiling as he painted your face resting peacefully against the soft, fluffy pillows which lifted your head up. You looked like the purest of angels sleeping soundly in his bed, and if he hadn’t known any better he wouldn’t have been convinced otherwise. After another hour or two passed and the painting was finished, he followed suit and slipped into bed next to you, turned off the nearby lamp on his nightstand and wrapped you up in his arms and pulled you close as he finally drifted off into the best sleep he’d ever had in years.

#albedo x reader #albedo x you #albedo x y/n #genshin x reader #genshin x you #genshin x y/n #albedo smut #genshin smut

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tsublue · 2 years

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Lilith in ASTROLOGY & observations

Picture credits: Pinterest

What does Lilith mean in astrology?

• Lilith, or more specifically, Black Moon Lillith, is the furthest point of the moon’s orbit around the earth, when the moon is at its most isolated. It represents “a person’s primitive impulses and behavior in their rawest form,” revealing repressed sexuality and “expresses the dark side of one’s personality, buried deep in the subconscious realms of our psyche.” Intense spooky energy. It’s also referred to as “our shadow self” and “Dark Side of the Moon.”

!! I truly love reading the comments and hearing about your thoughts. Let me know what is your Lilith in and what are your thoughts on it!

!! Please do not re-word, copy, steal, repost and etc my post. If you want to use something from my posts, then please ask for permission first and give credits. !!

Lilith in Aries/1st house/Aries degrees(1, 13, 25)

Your subconscious thinking is sharp minded and with a sharp tongue. You are willing to do anything to maintain your personal freedom. Depending on the chart, you get karmatic responses and they might happen to come later in life. Your extreme passions can prevent burnout and breakdowns. In relationships, you must learn to indulge and include your partner as you do yourself.

Lilith in Taurus/2nd house/Taurus degrees(2, 14, 26)

You are willing to do anything to feel physical and emotional pleasure. Mostly from people. You know how to separate yourself from people and avoid their energy, but you tend to ignore it sometimes. In a relationship you want to know the body of your partner in many ways such as even how it moves physically. You need to learn to balance your spiritual health and material wealth.

Lilith in Gemini/3rd house/Gemini degrees(3, 15, 27)

You are great at talking, but may feel an inner dissatisfaction in everything you do. Everything you already have learned or know still feels like it’s not enough still. You are prone to gossiping even the slightest bit or you do it with yourself in your head since you do not want to deal with the aftermath. Your words are the ones you defend yourself and you know how to choose them. You also tend to have a difficulty to settle for a relationship in many ways. But it does not have to be your priority. Enjoy your own time.

Lilith in Cancer/4th house/Cancer degrees(4, 16, 28)

In relationships you tend to give so much that you might lose your independence and traits of your own personality. Deep inside you is there still this innocent little kid who wants love and peace. When you’re with yourself you probably enjoy taking care of your inner child. Do not jump into love and relationships at a minor convince and to just feel it. Focus on yourself and set boundaries and boarder lines between you, your mind and the outsiders and others thoughts and opinions. Have your eyes out. People are here to manipulate you.

Lilith in Leo/5th house/Leo degrees(5, 17, 29)

You might me seen as someone who overindulges and there is basically almost nothing you can do about it even if it is not true. Be aware to not have excessive confidence and self-esteem to the point of delusion and narcissism. It is your karmatic duty to look out for your attitude and how you present yourself. You either get bored with yourself or at a perfect balance and would rather be by yourself maybe because of the experience with not matching with other people and in other words getting called annoying.

Lilith in Virgo/6th house/Virgo degrees(6, 18)

You have an obsession with detail and perfection even if you never want to admit it. You love to be in control in many ways. Simply because you know how to do it and only you can do it right. Your karmatic duty will involve you letting go of control and the need for perfection and embracing change. Your subconscious is a very straight forward and analytical place. you overindulge in aesthetics and obsess over little details you will eventually learn to let things take their course if you put your mind really into it.

Lilith in Libra/7th house/Libra degrees(7, 19)

You and your subconscious is a social butterfly. You overindulge in the company of others. You need to set a line between yourself and others when talking and being around etc. You need to set boundaries for yourself. Losing your personality in a conversation just to be liked in that 5 min convo is not good for you. You need to learn to be by yourself as a karmatic duty. Marriage and long term relationships may bring struggles to you or you may meet partners who are karmatic or karma to you.

Lilith in Scorpio/8th house/Scorpio degrees(8, 20)

Your subconscious is often in need for transformation such as for you to turn bigger and better. You are prone to the dark and dark truths even if it can scare you. You want to know everything. On the outside picture you like to keep your mind and subconscious hidden and far away from other energies and people who can harm it since its a fragile thing and you need to protect it even if it’s a subconscious thought. You also may seek for the spiritual reasoning and meaning in things you do daily and your mind is like a library. You have A LOT there, especially in the subconscious. I’d recommend you to be close with your mind and develop an connection more than anything.

Lilith in Sagittarius/9th house/Sagittarius degrees(9, 21)

You may love education and getting knowledge even if you do not want to admit it. there is a pull towards the spiritual and a natural go-with-the-flow attitude. One of your karmatic duties is to figure out what you truly believe in without any pressure from other individuals. You really gotta figure out what is the right and wrong on your own. You probably deep down think that everything is fated and out of your control but there are still things out there that you CAN control continuously. You will have to chase relationships that help you grow spiritually rather than in societal education.

Lilith in Capricorn/10th house/Capricorn degrees(10, 22)

For your karmatic duty your public success and material wealth will be tested. You gotta learn to detach yourself from your work life and balance other stuff such as non material stuff. You are very much family oriented and it will help your develop relationships that run in other than materialistic level. You may feel like an outcast or even maybe basic in the subconscious and if pisces placements included in the chart then it has caused isolation since you’ve figured out there is not better place then your own mind or your try to avoid it. Just a friendly and helpful reminder: You running away won’t make them stop chasing. process through it.

Lilith in Aquarius/11th house/Aquarius degrees(11, 23)

You tend to base your personality and mindset off of your friend group and the people you surround yourself with. You need a feel of uniqueness and being different in the subconscious. It can bring you stress and anxiety if you are fitting in too much. If may feel like you’ve lost you and your personality and became an NPC in a way. You thrive in a relationship where the person has a uniqueness to themselves as well. Your karmatic duty will be learning to set boundaries and stop being a people pleaser. Each friendship and relationship will teach you something. Even if you think it’s the most useless thing. You learn a lot from these and different people for an example if they have a different background.

Lilith in Pisces/12th house/Pisces degrees(12, 24)

You have a severe need to escape life all the time. You will learn that your mind and unconscious is an unique place and isolation are a pleasurable things. Your karmatic duty is to regain your independence while simultaneously working and healing with others. you have a regenerative power from within and can master great strength to transform yourself. You need to have a line, even if its really thin between your spiritual and physical health. In relationships you may struggle with welcoming your partner into your mind and mindset since it’s a well protected place that people rarely have access to and learning to be more open is hard.

WOAH that took me a whole day but I finished it on an angel number👍

If you do not relate to the observations, then keep in mind, that it’s just my observations and not everything is straight up 100% facts.

I really truly hope that you enjoyed this post.

I also have a song for you who have made it this far, you deserve a treat!

The depressive one:

And the happier one I guess?:

See you next time!

~ Love, Tsunami

#astrology #lilith #observations #tumbrl

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luvyblossom · 10 months

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Love me (not) (Pt. 3)

Hello Lovelies!

Thank you to those who have given me so much love on the previous parts! There will be a part 4 coming soon. This chapter is so self indulgent. Lots of angry Hyunjin! Also if you want to be added to the taglist just leave a note and I will add you.

Happy Reading!

W/c 4.5k

Warnings: this fic contains sexual content. MDNI

Series Masterlist

_____________________________

The week went by as normal except for the fact that you had not seen Hyunjin since he left your apartment that night. You had texted him to hang out a few times but he had said he was busy with some project or had other plans so you let it be. Felix had started to join your regular study sessions that used to be with Hyunjin and he would drag you to the gym after to show you some Taekwondo moves. Your evenings passed by pleasantly that week with Felix and his lessons would tucker you out so that you were ready for bed as soon as you got home. You were almost tired enough to not miss Hyunjin sleeping next to you- almost.

It was finally Friday and the day of your 'date' with Felix. You weren't sure if it was a date yet. Although you had spent hours with him this week, he had been friendly and nothing more. No real flirting, no almost kisses- which was frustrating because watching him show you martial arts moves only made him sexier. You had tried to call Hyunjin but he hadn't picked up. You were starting to wonder if something else was going on. He had never spent this much time away from you. Maybe he was just really stressed with his project but you decided that you would go see him tomorrow, he needed to take a break at some point. Now however, you had to get ready for a hike which was likely uphill. How exactly could you look cute while sweating?

"Where exactly is this hike?" You asked Felix as you climbed into his passenger seat.

"It's a surprise." He gave you his signature smile as he started to drive. You both listened to music and sang along. Maybe you were just forming a friendship similar to what you and Hyunjin had. Felix felt familiar and while you found him extremely attractive, he had not given you any indication that he liked you after the night of the party so you decided to clear your mind of any date ideas. You would just be disappointed again if you were expecting it.

Felix parked his car in what looked like the middle of nowhere. You were surrounded by trees and there was no sign of any civilization. "You didn't bring me here to kill me right?"

Felix laughed, "I've shown you enough self-defence that you should be able to take me down."

The hike was really pleasant. Trees surrounded you and when the foliage thinned you could see a river with bright blue water running alongside the trail. You walked quietly with Felix, a comfortable quiet, as you took in the beauty around you. The whole time Felix just watched you.

"This is the spot," Felix said as you reached a clearing at the top of the hill. Two large rocks sat at the top as if they had been placed there just so you and Felix could sit. From the lookout you could see the expanse of the river, the changing csky and the faint outline of the city skyline. You had made it just in time for the sun to start setting.

"It's absolutely beautiful," you sat on one of the rocks and Felix sat down next to you. The sky turned shades of orange, red, pink and purple as the sun started to dip below the horizon. "So how many girls have you brought here?" You teased.

"Actually just one," Felix rubbed the back of his neck, a habit that you had learned to recognize was a sign that he was nervous. "My grandma used to bring me here. She always told me this spot was magic, if you made a wish as the sun set, it would come true."

"What did you wish for?" You turned to Felix, peeling your eyes away from the gorgeous view in front of you. He was already looking at you, his brown eyes looking so intently as if he was trying to memorize every part of your face. He moved closer to you and crashed his lips onto to yours, taking you by complete surprise. The kiss was deep and he held onto you, pulling you close against him as if you were going to be taken away. He ran his tongue over your lips asking for entrance which you granted, allowing him to deepen the kiss. You pulled away to get some air and moved to straddle his lap. As soon as you were sitting on him, his lips were back on yours.

You felt his hands start to explore your body, tracing his fingers from your neck, down your back and to your hips, leaving your skin burning with every touch. He let out a moan as you started to grind yourself down on him, feeling how hard he was. He kissed down your jawline until he reached a sensitive spot on your neck, leaving a love bite there while he guided your hips to roll over his length. You could feel the wetness gathering in your panties as you rubbed yourself against him, getting just enough stimulation for momentary satisfaction while leaving you wanting so much more. Felix was leaving sloppy kisses and bites all over your collarbones while desperately pushing up into you, yearning for friction as well. He suddenly stopped his movement and pulled himself away from you, drawing a whine from you.

"I think we should head back," he sounded breathless as he said it. As much as you wanted him to rip off your clothes and fuck you there, it had become dark. The city skyline painted a faint figure of lights in the distance and the stars and moon reflected in the water. You could hear coyotes in the otherwise quiet night so you reluctantly agreed.

The moon lit your hike back. Felix and you walked hand in hand, admiring the stars, the admiration being interrupted with bouts of making out on the path before remembering your final destination. When you did finally reach Felix's car, you were more desperate than ever. As soon as he climbed into the car you were on top of him once again, crashing your lips onto his. You let your hands roam his body and slip under his shirt to feel his muscled torso and chest. His muscles were carved out, defined like a statue. It was your turn to mark him up as you kissed over his collarbones.

Felix groaned as he placed his hands on your shoulders and gently pushed you away from him so you were face to face. " Can we just talk for a second?" He was still breathless as he held you away from him, resisting the urge to buck his hips up into you.

You were surprised, not sure what to expect as you nodded your head.

He brought one of his hands away from you to scratch the back of his neck. "So I-uh," he closed his eyes tight, trying to figure out the right way to say what he wanted. He opened his eyes but avoided looking into yours, "I have a bit of a reputation of uh, sleeping around. I know it may make me seem like that's all I want but I really like you and I don't want it to come off like I just want a one night stand. Can we take it slow so I can actually date you?"

There was your heart, thumping loud enough to echo through the quiet valley. He looked so cute being this nervous and he liked you? He wanted to date you? You felt admired, wanted and so warm as he sat nervously, waiting for your answer. You moved the short distance between the both of you and gave him a kiss on the cheek, getting his attention so he would finally meet your gaze. "I can take it slow," you reassured him with a smile. You could see the relief wash over Felix's face as the smile that almost permanently sat on his face returned.

Despite being tired from your week with Felix and the long hike, you sat in bed feeling more giddy than ever, recounting all the events that happened today. You felt a blush spread over you as you remembered how Felix had felt against you. How he had told you how he felt. You didn't have to guess or overthink, he just told you what he thought. You wanted to call Hyunjin to tell him everything that happened but it was already late. You would have to wait until tomorrow.

-------

You tried Hyunjin's phone getting sent to voicemail for what felt like the 100th time this week. You hung up and called Seungmin instead who refreshingly, picked up after the first ring.

"Hello pretty lady. What makes you call today?"

"Is Hyunjin there? I have literally not been able to get a hold of him this entire week."

"He's not home. He's been a dick this whole week. I think he's fought with everyone at the house atleast once."

That was weird. Hyunjin could have a temper but it rarely came out and he wasn't one to pick fights quickly. "He must be really stressed over that project. Do you know when he'll be back? I'm gonna force him to take a break."

"I'm not sure when he'll be back but we're having a party tonight and I know he'll be there for that so just come tonight."

You let out a sigh. Another party. "Okay I guess if that's the only way to get a hold of him. Do you know if he's angry with me? I've never seen him be this intense about school." You weren't sure what exactly you could have done to deserve this much of a cold shoulder from him but maybe that's why he had been avoiding you.

"He hasn't talked to me at all, but I'll see you tonight!"

-------------

You walked into the over crowded frat house trying to navigate your way through the crowd and find a familiar face. You found Seungmin at his spot in the kitchen making drinks.

He gave you a smile and a hug when he saw you, handing you a drink. "You look hot,” was all he said as he looked at you, making you blush at the compliment. You had worn a fitted short dress with thin straps that left most of your cleavage exposed. You smacked Seungmin's arm as he pretended to gawk at you so he would stop teasing.

"Do you know where he is? Has he already found a girl or can I catch him before he disappears?" You didn't want to walk into his room and have a repeat of last weekend.

Seungmin pointed Hyunjin out to you, he was sitting on one of the couches next to some girl- it wasn't Jess to your relief. She had her hands on his arm as she kept talking and he seemed to be barely listening to what she said. He looked so effortlessly gorgous as he sat there in a white button down and black jeans. His black hair framed his face and rings adorned his long fingers as they wrapped around his red solo cup. Not seeing Hyunjin for so many days had made you forget how perfect he looked, almost unreal.

"Good luck, he's been so grumpy," Seungmin said as you made your way through the suffocating crowd again to reach Hyunjin.

You tapped the girl's shoulder, "I'm sorry to interrupt but I really need to talk to Hyunjin." She gave you a dirty look and tried to turn back to Hyunjin. You proceeded to shove yourself between the two of them on the couch, successfully chasing her away after she called you a bitch under her breath.

Hyunjin looked at you but somehow avoided eye contact, "Y/n, what are you doing here?" His voice was quiet but sounded so cold and monotone.

"I came to see you," you tried to place your hand on his but he pulled it away from your grasp. "Is something wrong?" Hyunjin wouldn't look at you and you were starting to get over the silent treatment he was giving you. You chugged your drink and then grabbed Hyunjin's forearm, attempting to drag him off the couch. It wasn't very successful as he didn't even budge an inch despite you using your full force. You held on to him and gave him a pleading look until he got off the couch with a sigh and let you lead him. You ended up taking him to his room so it would be quiet enough to have a conversation. You were happy to find that there wasn't a girl waiting to kiss his face off in his room tonight.

"What do you want?" Hyunjin sounded like an angry teen as he sat down at the edge of his bed.

"I want to know what’s wrong with you. I haven't seen you all week and you've barely spoken to me."

"I told you I was busy." Hyunjin still refused to look at you.

"Did I do something to piss you off? Did something happen? Seungmin told me how grumpy you've been this week."

Hyunjin didn't say anything, looking down at his shoes, still effortlessly gorgeous even when he was moping. You walked up right in front of him and hugged him, pulling him close to you. He didn't resist but he also didn't wrap his arms around you in the way you had become accustomed to. You pulled away and moved your hand under his chin, tilting his head up so he would finally look at you, ignoring the way your heart echoed in your ears at the proximity. His deep brown eyes seemed clouded, like they had a storm brewing behind them that hadn't quite reached the surface.

"It's okay if you don't want to talk about it but don't ignore me please." You wanted to tell him how much you had missed him this week. How empty and cold your bed had felt without his presence but you knew how needy that would sound and you didn’t want to say those words aloud.

Hyunjin’s eyes softened as he looked into yours, recognizing the concern that flooded them. He spread his knees so you could slot into the space between his legs as he sat at the edge of his bed. His arms finally wrapped around you and he pulled you in so close that you could feel each other breathe.

Hyunjin let out a deep sigh, pulling you even closer, "you didn't do anything wrong. I'm sorry." He closed his eyes and nuzzled his head into your neck. With his lips ghosting over your skin he whispered, "I missed you," so quietly that you almost didn't hear.

Your breath hitched, being this close to Hyunjin was dangerous. You pushed away from him, giving him a warm smile when he looked up at you, loosening his grasp on you. You wiggled out of his arms and began to look around his room. His desk was cluttered with different art supplies, the walls covered in paintings and posters. An easel sat by his window in the corner of the room. It faced away from you so you couldn't see what was painted on the canvas.

"You promised you'd show me your paintings. I think I've earned a private showing by now."

Hyunjin stood up and walked over to his desk to grab a sketchbook. He sat back down on his bed and patted the spot next to him signalling you to sit down. He flipped through the book describing the inspiration behind every painting and picture. His art was breathtaking with such a wide range from delicate water colour paintings of abstract scenery to sketches so precise that they looked like photographs. They gave you a different view into his life: his dog back home, the places he'd seen and his favourite movie scenes.

"So not only is Hyunjin Hwang absolutely gorgeous but he's also extremely talented." You complimented him, not noticing the blush that painted over his cheeks. You kicked off your heeled boots and started to walk around his room, admiring his paintings that decorated his walls.

Hyunjin sat, watching you as you smiled at his paintings, pointing out the scenes of places that you had visited together. He got the chance to take you in. You. Looked. Hot. Your dress left little to the imagination as it hugged every one of your curves. Being away from you for a week had allowed Hyunjin to ignore how he had started feeling about you after the towel incident, but being around you now, looking the way you do- it brought those feelings bubbling back. He was willing himself not to get hard in your presence. Hyunjin had not met with any girl since the last party, your lack of presence in his days making everything feel boring. He had been pent up and he didn’t realize it until you were in front of him, with your perfect lips and in that tight dress. The sight of you was only making his situation harder. While lost in his horny thoughts, Hyunjin did not notice you open up the other sketchbook on his desk.

You felt like you were in your own museum, getting to feel the artist's art not only through the paintings but through his words. Hyunjin was very talented and you lamented not getting to appreciate his art sooner. You finished examining all the paintings on his wall and started to look at the various sketches scattered over his desk, finding a sketchbook that he hadn't shown you yet. As you flipped through the pages you saw some shadow-work and flower paintings. Then you reached a sketch with made you stop turning. The picture was of the library where you always studied, the focus of the sketch being a girl with her hair swept up in a bun, brows furrowed as she held a pen between her teeth and stared down at something in front of her. It was a sketch of you.

"Did you draw me?" You asked Hyunjin while turning to the next page. Here was a drawing of a familiar memory when you and Hyunjin had gone to the beach. There you sat in the sand, looking out at the sea with your beach towel wrapped loosely around your shoulders for warmth. He had drawn it from his perspective. He sat next to you that evening and had captured your side profile while you were unaware, lost in the feeling of the misty breeze that had floated over the ocean.

Your words snapped Hyunjin back to reality. It took him a second but he realized which one of his books you were holding. His eyes widened in panic, "Don't look at that one." He practically shouted as he lunged towards you, aiming to grab the book out of your hands before you could look any further. You tried to dodge him but your reflexes were not quite as fast as his. He swiftly grabbed the book out of your hand but not before you got a glimpse of the next page. You had seen a side profile where the girl wore a loose muscle shirt that showed ample side-boob and allowed her nipple to poke through the thin fabric. What stood out to you was the small rose tattoo that sat beneath her breast, right on the rib. The small tattoo that you had gotten on your 19th birthday, the one that was so easy to hide that very few people knew about it.

You didn't get time to process the intimate drawing as you found yourself trapped between Hyunjin and the desk. He stood against you with one hand on the desk supporting his weight and the other holding the sketchbook behind him. The proximity and the thought of his sketch left you feeling dizzy. You somehow found the breath to say, "Why can't I see it?" Not giving away that you may be aware of exactly why he didn't want you to look.

Hyunjin chose not to answer the question, being unable to think of an excuse when he stood this close to you. Your body pressed up against his and your face so close to his that the smallest movement would allow him to kiss your soft, tinted red lips. He tried to shake the urge to take what he wanted most at this moment. Instead he gently brushed his fingers over your jaw. The touch was so light that you barely felt it, but it was enough to make breathing impossible for you as you stood feeling like a deer in headlights trapped under his intense, almost hungry gaze. He used the same feather light touch to run his fingers down your neck. You still held your breath, heartbeat drowning out all the noise from the party going on just outside the door, leaving you feeling like it was just you and him in this moment.

Suddenly, his fingers stopped their gentle movement as they lingered at the base of your neck. His eyes staring at a spot and his gaze changing from soft to intense fury. He spoke in a quiet, measured voice, "Who did that to you?"

Your attention was brought to the spot that his eyes were fixated on. You ran your hand over it, feeling the tender flesh, realizing it was the spot where Felix had left a hickey on you the night before. You had completely forgotten about it.

"Y/n, who did that?" Hyunjin repeated, voice as quiet as before but the words sounding harsh.

"I uh- I had the date last night and-"

Hyunjin cut you off, "Did you fucking sleep with him?" He scoffed. "One fucking mediocre-ass date and you threw yourself at him." Hyunjin's words dripped with bitterness as he glared at you, his body still pressed against yours and his fingers still hovering over the hickey on your neck.

You attempted to push Hyunjin off of you,"it is none of your fucking business what happened between us." You matched his rage as you continued to push against him, failing to move his body. "Let me go."

"He's going to use you and then toss you aside when he's bored" Hyunjin snapped at you, continuing to trap you with his tall frame.

"Not every guy is like you." You pushed him away one more time, this time he let you go.

Your words rang in Hyunjin's ears. It stung that you thought of him like that, but he knew it was true. You walked away from him and sat down on the edge of his bed again, beginning to lace up your boots. "Where are you going? It's almost 2am."

"You don't need to monitor everything I do." His worry was valid and you felt a bit bad for snapping at him again but you were so angry. Who is he to dictate what sort of relationship you had with Felix? There was finally a decent guy who liked you, who wanted you and who was honest about his feelings and you weren't going to let Hyunjin's dislike of him ruin a potentially good relationship.

Hyunjin swallowed his jealousy, pain and anger, recognizing the rage that you held behind every word. He had just got you back and he did not want to spend anymore time without you. The week truly had been so lonely without you. He walked over and knelt in front of you, slowly taking your hands away from your boots so you would leave the task and acknowledge him. "I'm sorry," he closed his eyes, "I'm being overprotective. I just don't want you to hurt."

You let out a breath, the warmth from his hands working it's way through your anger, reminding you how much you missed him. "I know you care about me and you mean well. I know you don't like him but I promise he's genuine. He really makes me feel special and I trust him."

Hyunjin kept his eyes squeezed shut as you made your case for Felix. Finally, he met your gaze, "Stay over tonight. It's too late for you to go home." You agreed, too tired to go home at this point and looking forward to time with your friend. You spent the rest of the night watching movies in Hyunjin's bed, comfy in his t-shirt, until you both drifted off to sleep. The glimpse of the sketch still at the back of your mind as your eyes fluttered shut.

-------

You joined the line of girls doing the walk of shame out of Sigma Chi the next morning. Hyunjin was still asleep but you needed to go home. You could not shower with his 5-in-1 wash again. Unlike the other girls who tugged on their clothes and uncomfortable shoes from the night before, you had the luxury of leaving in Hyunjin's hoodie and a pair of his sweats.

As you walked out, you heard someone calling your name. You turned to see Felix jogging towards you. "Good morning," he said when he reached you. "What are you up to?"

"Morning. I'm heading home. Hopefully to take a nap," you replied. "What are you doing running on a Sunday morning like a psychopath?"

Felix laughed, "Training doesn't end. But I'm done for now, let me walk you home." He took your hand in his, lacing his fingers through yours. "You were at Sigma Chi?" He tried to sound casual, masking how the question was gnawing at him.

"Yeah. I was at the party last night and ended up staying over since it was late," you explained, not picking up on how Felix clenched his jaw.

He wasn't sure how to prod further without making it seem like he wanted to know what exactly happened. He had been happy this week, thinking Hyunjin had backed off but now he saw you walk out of Hyunjin's house, dressed in clothes that were definitely too baggy to belong to you. He finally blurted out, "you saw Hyunjin?"

"Yeah, I went to see him and we talked it out. It's good to not be fighting anymore." Despite being tired, you felt light. The weight that Hyunjin's absence had left on you finally lifted. Felix on the other hand did not feel as light. Maybe the hickey had been too subtle.

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And that's the end of Part 3!!

This is an original work. Do not republish or repost this work in any form, including translations.

©LuvyBlossom

Tags: @chartrucewhore, @meeeds

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