#have some more stuff

[riality-check]

steddie role reversal au part 3! part 1 and part 2 are linked in case you missed it!

Steve comes back from practice. Hopper isn’t sure which it is, whether it’s basketball or swim, but he looks stressed no matter what. 

He always looks stressed after practice.

“You can quit, you know,” Hopper says from the couch. What possessed him to say that in this moment, he doesn’t know, but it’s been something he’s thought about saying to the kid for the past week. 

Steve stops mid-step on the way to his room. Hopper can smell the chlorine from here, so he guesses it was swim practice. 

“What?” he says. 

“You can quit if you want.” 

“I won’t get into college otherwise,” Steve says. 

Not why did you say that? or I don’t want to.

I won’t get into college. 

“You don’t have to go to college,” Hopper says. “I didn’t, and I like to think I did alright.” 

“I don’t want to be a cop.” 

“I don’t think any department would have you,” Hopper says honestly. 

Steve smiles at that, but they both know that’s as close as they’re gonna get to talking about the last two months, when Steve was in the back of the squad car more than he was out of it, until he finally said something about couch surfing and sleeping in his car when his “friends” stopped wanting him around. Until Hopper offered up his own place, so long as Steve quit dealing drugs to try to afford a proper place to sleep.

Hopper wishes he’d seen it sooner and then shoves that thought out of his head. He can’t go back. All he can do is meet Steve where he’s at and help him now.

“You’ve got options, is all I’m saying.” 

Steve nods. He doesn’t say anything else, just goes right to his room. 

The next day, he comes back right after school for the first time, and he looks so much happier.

________________________________________________________________

Eddie can't remember the last time he's been able to breathe right. 

Since freshman year, since his coach saw him take off down the football field, his life has been running. Cross country in the fall, indoor in the winter, outdoor in the spring. He runs and runs and runs and breathes fine while he does it. 

It's when he stops that air can't seem to find its way into his lungs. 

It's when he stops that he sees that he hasn't broken his PR in two weeks. It's when he stops that he sees how much college costs. It's when he stops that he realizes he has to study for a test. It's when he stops that he changes out of his shorts and into his work clothes, ready for a shift at Thatcher. 

He can't stop. He has to keep running. He has to break his PR and get the scholarship. He has to keep his grades up. He has to keep working to cover what the scholarship won't. 

No one else is telling him this. Not his coaches, not his teammates, and certainly not Wayne. 

Eddie can't breathe, and it's no one's fault but his own.

[mamawasatesttube]

BTW... PSA.... even if we arent mutuals if youre in my notes regularly theres a Very high chance i am still fond of you. yes im vaguing someones tags on the compliment the person u rbed this from post. but like. positive vaguing? THE POINT IS im weird abt following ppl but IM STILL SENDING U FOND VIBES...

[jakeperalta]

letting celebrities think they can and should "use their platform" to speak on all current events and political issues regardless of how educated they are on them was a grave mistake

[bixels]

Learning that fans hated Applejack and called her "boring" is crazyyy to me because I genuinely, unironically believe AJ's the most complex character in the main six.

Backstory-wise, she was born into a family of famers/blue collar workers who helped found the town she lives in. She grew up a habitual liar until she had the bad habit traumatized outta her. She lost both her parents and was orphaned at a young age, having to step up as her baby sister's mother figure. She's the only person in the main gang who's experienced this level of loss and grief (A Royal Problem reveals that AJ dreams about memories of being held by her parents as a baby). She moved to Manhattan to live with her wealthy family members, only to realize she'll never fit in or be accepted, even amongst her own family. The earlier seasons imply she and her family had money problems too (In The Ticket Master, AJ wants to go to the gala to earn money to buy new farm equipment and afford hip surgery for her grandma).

Personality-wise, she's a total people-pleaser/steamroller (with an occasional savior complex) who places her self worth on her independence and usefulness for other people, causing her to become a complete workaholic. In Applebuck Season, AJ stops taking care of herself because of her obsessive responsibilities for others and becomes completely dysfunctional. In Apple Family Reunion, AJ has a tearful breakdown because in she thinks she dishonored her family and tarnished her reputation as a potential leader –– an expectation and anxiety that's directly tied to her deceased parents, as shown in the episode's ending scene. In The Last Roundup, AJ abandons her family and friends out of shame because believes she failed them by not earning 1st place in a rodeo competition. She completely spirals emotionally when she isn't able to fulfill her duties toward others. Her need to be the best manifests in intense pride and competitiveness when others challenge her. And when her pride's broken, she cowers and physically hides herself.

Moreover, it's strongly implied that AJ has a deep-seated anger. The comics explore her ranting outbursts more. EQG also obviously has AJ yelling at and insulting Rarity in a jealous fit just to hurt her feelings (with a line that I could write a whole dissection on). And I'm certain I read in a post somewhere that in a Gameloft event, AJ's negative traits are listed as anger.

Subtextually, a lot of these flaws and anxieties can be (retroactively) linked to her parents' death, forcing her to grow up too quickly to become the adult/caregiver of the family (especially after her big brother becomes semiverbal). Notice how throughout the series, she's constantly acting as the "mom friend" of the group (despite everything, she manages to be the most emotionally mature of the bunch). Notice how AJ'll switch to a quieter, calmer tone when her friends are panicking and use soothing prompts and questions to talk them through their emotions/problems; something she'd definitely pick up while raising a child. Same with her stoicism and reluctance at crying or releasing emotions (something Pinkie explicitly points out). She also had a childhood relationship with Rara (which, if you were to give a queer reading, could easy be interpreted as her first 'aha' crush), who eventually left her life. (Interestingly enough, AJ also has an angry outburst with Rara for the same exact reasons as with EQG Rarity; jealous, upset that someone else is using and changing her). It's not hard to imagine an AJ with separation anxiety stemming from her mother and childhood friend/crush leaving. I'm also not above reading into AJ's relationship with her little sister (Y'all ever think about how AB never got to know her parents, even though she shares her father's colors and her mother's curly hair?).

AJ's stubbornness is a symptom of growing up too quickly as well. Who else to play with your baby sister when your brother goes nonverbal (not to discount Big Mac's role in raising AB)? Who else to wake up in the middle of the night to care for your crying baby sister when your grandma needs her rest? When you need to be 100% all the time for your family, you tend to become hard-stuck with a sense of moral superiority. You know what's best because you have to be your best because if you're aren't your best, then everything'll inevitably fall apart and it'll be your fault. And if you don't know what's best –– if you've been wrong the whole time –– that means you haven't been your best, which means you've failed the people who rely on you, which means you can't fulfill your role in the family/society, which makes you worthless . We've seen time and time again how this compulsive need to be right for the sake of others becomes self-destructive (Apple Family Reunion, Sound of Silence, all competitions against RD). We've seen in The Last Roundup how, when no longer at her best, AJ would rather remove herself from her community than confront them because she no longer feels of use to them.

But I guess it is kinda weird that AJ has "masculine" traits and isn't interested in men at all. It's totally justified that an aggressively straight, misogynistic male fandom would characterize her as a "boring background character." /s

At the time of writing this, it's 4:46AM.

[sysig]

Permission to headbutt: Granted (Patreon)

[starspilli]

now and then

very quick VERY rough very very very self indulgent doodles… i will accept no criticisms on this 🙏

[dog-teeth]

3 years post op anniversary

[uncharted-constellations]

It’s been a minute, (both post wise and design wise) so decided to update the fam + a couple additions compared to last time

[verflares]

i thought i felt your shape, but i was wrong. really all i felt was falsely strong, i held on tight and closed my eyes. it was dumb, i had no sense of your size. it was dumb to hold so tight.

[cryptcatz]

question: do ppl ACTUALLY say things they don’t mean when they’re angry? or is that just an excuse after letting something true slip? i wouldn’t ever say something i don’t mean in anger, so the concept confuses me.

but something was said to me that is bothering me, though apparently was said in an argument and wasn’t meant. but i don’t rlly believe it wasn’t like, deep down true thoughts/feelings??? anyone have any insight? anyone say things they don’t mean in anger?

EDIT: this was a hastily worded post that i didn’t expect to get notes. this is a genuine question asked in good faith that i got a lot of amazing answers to!

also re: the many ppl saying “OP is lying about not saying things they don’t mean in anger because everyone does it”— i genuinely have never done that. if i say something mean while angry, i meant it. that’s literally why i asked this question and why the concept confuses me, because i wouldn’t do something like that so i wanted perspective from people who do it. idk why y’all can’t believe that lmao not everyone is as prone to anger and outbursts

[drawnbythestream]

Obi-wan and his friend Bant Eerin having a sad moment after certain events

[mienar]

stillness in these waking hours

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[fallenrain40]

the MORE aphobia i see in fandoms, the more annoyingly in-your-face aroace i'm going to get. i aint gonna sit back and let aroace get erased, aphobia is literally just repackaged homophobia.

[sbeana]

the pool scene

[caffichai]

Regular Abyssal Hunter downtime activities

[classicslesbianopinions]

the other thing about being disabled in academia is everyone is like "yeah we can't do much about the buildings they're old :/" as if "old" being a synonym for "inaccessible" isn't just a constant reminder that the people who built the school did not imagine that someday someone like me might study there