#hey you asked for

[clingyduoapologist]

hello!! I was redirected here by bronzetomatoes after inquiring about kylo ren hate (I think the hitting him with a car post is so funny and also i know so little about star wars. it adds to the comedy tbh) and i was told if i want the funny/thorough answer that you’re the place to go. so if you’d like to, go absolutely off the walls about it :)

My friend have you come to the right place.

SO BASICALLY Star Wars is a story about how 3 good movies collectively altered the course of human history by making just like, stupid amounts of money right?

So obviously, Disney was like “I need to get in on that” and bought Star Wars and then started working on their own trilogy. If you’re a Star Wars fan, this is pretty cool! New planets, new character, new lore! It was pretty awesome. The trailer for the first movie in this new trilogy came out and everyone loved it! So much interesting things!!! A female protagonist?!?!? Wow this is so awesome!!!

The problem was the movie isn’t very good.

Don’t get me wrong the force awakens is fine, definitely the best movie in the trilogy, the problem is that it wasn’t good enough, not for most audiences, and especially not for Disney. So they fired JJ Abrams, who directed the force awakens, and hired Ryan Johnson to direct the second movie: the last Jedi.

I fucking hate the last Jedi.

And so did like half the world, and what followed the release of the film was probably the worst fucking time in the history of life on earth to be a Star Wars fan, as basically the entire fanbase devolved into a civil war between last jedi haters and last jedi defenders.

But amongst all the fighting, another group was beginning to form, one that had began in the shadows of the Force Awakens, but was now bolstered by the release of the last Jedi, a shadowy and secretive threat that was about to rear it’s ugly head:

Reylo.

Now, Reylo, as a ship is like, fine? It’s literally just the most barebones enemies to lovers ship you can imagine.

But Reylo as a fanbase? That’s where things start to get interesting. Because what Reylo lacked in character and writing, it made up for in hot fucking actors (I mean it’s fucking Daisy Ridley and Adam Driver what did you expect). this in turn led to a vicious cycle where Reylo fans were extremely uh… motivated… and also had basically blank canvases to build off of. This lead to the Reylo fandom becoming almost a separate entity to the Star Wars fandom, which only further boosted their forces.

But what made Reylo infamous was the scale. These guys were loud, and were prepared to rip anyone to shreds for even the smallest injustices. It was a dog eat dog world, and one that maintained itself through a constant state of war.

But setting Reylo fans aside for a second, you may be wondering “Okay but what does any of that have to do with Kylo Ren?” Which, sure fair question. But to answer that, we have to look at Reylo not as a ship, but as characters.

Now, Rey, as far as protagonists go, is… fine? She’s definitely screwed majorly by being in a completely unplanned trilogy of movies that wasn’t interest in making her a compelling and likable character, but like even then I’d be lying if I said that she wasn’t at the very least interesting. And again like I’ll take any excuse to see Daisy Ridl- sorry what, anyways point is Rey Palpatine skywalker kenobi whatever is a perfectly mediocre protagonist and thus, while sexist assholes may try to convince you that she burned the world’s crops and poisoned the town water supply, truth be told I and many others fans became at worst indifferent, and best charmed by her.

But Kylo Ren? Kylo Motherfucking Ren? Ben SWOLO himself?

This man makes me violent.

And it’s not because he’s more well written then Rey, or even because his writing is particularly worse, as far as I’m concerned they’re both hand in unlovable in in terms of writing quality.

The problem with Kylo is that he could of been so much better, so easily, and yet people still fawned over him.

Like, this guy is Darth Vader’s Fucking Grandson, Luke Skywalker’s Nephew, Son of Han Solo and Leia Skywalker, 1 hot actor removed from self insert character, and yet these writers fucking struggle, each and every time, to figure out what to do with him. Like they are fucking racking their brains trying to make a guy with one of the sickest lightsaber designs ever and a badass outfit all being acted by ADAM FUCKING DRIVER “interesting.”

And PEOPLE FUCKING FELL FOR IT. Like if you go into almost any even slightly sad tag in ao3 I guarantee there will be at least one kylo fic. Like I can not stress to you enough how many people fucking lost their MINDS!!!

FOR HIM

And remember, this is all ON TOP of the fawning that Reylo stans had already been doing. Which only made things worse, if you can even believe that.

And so ever since Rise of Skywalker managed to drag the sequel trilogy’s tired, burning, mangled corpse over the finish line, and all the buzz over it died down, and every YouTube video essayist/movie analyzer saw dollar signs in their eyes, we’re left here, with Adam Driver’s tits swaying in the wind. And for what? The most stock Sad Boy Villaintm of all time and his British gf? A marginally cool lightsaber design? Maybe like, 1 cool fight scene at the end of the first movie?

Like… I’m just left to stare… Stare at this man’s hot topic shopper ass hair cut and Zuko wannabe facial scar, left with nothing better to do than seethe, quietly and angrily, at a character who could have been so much, who could have done so much, but yet was doomed to only ever be himself.

In the end, I suppose I am like Sisyphus, rolling my anger up a hill, knowing that it’ll only roll back down again anyway, and yet not an ounce less motivated to continue my toil. Because Kylo Ren is my enemy, my one true opposite in this great narrative we call reality.

And at least, on some nights, I can rest easy knowing that he fucking died at the end.

[druid-for-hire]

[image id: a four-page comic. it is titled "immortality” after the poem by clare harner (more popularly known as “do not stand at my grave and weep”). the first page shows paleontologists digging up fossils at a dig. it reads, “do not stand at my grave and weep. i am not there. i do not sleep.” page two features several prehistoric creatures living in the wild. not featured but notable, each have modern descendants: horses, cetaceans, horsetail plants, and crocodilians. it reads, “i am a thousand winds that blow. i am the diamond glints on snow. i am the sunlight on ripened grain. i am the gentle autumn rain.” the third page shows archaeopteryx in the treetops and the skies, then a modern museum-goer reading the placard on a fossil display. it reads, “when you awaken in the morning’s hush, i am the swift uplifting rush, of quiet birds in circled flight. i am the soft stars that shine at night. do not stand at my grave and cry.” the fourth page shows a chicken in a field. it reads, “i am not there. i did not die” / end id]

a comic i made in about 15 hours for my school’s comic anthology. the theme was “evolution”

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Hey now, Let her cook!

[little-pissbaby]

fun fact about me! I have hyperadrenergic Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (hPOTS). this means I am prone to fainting when I change positions or when I feel a strong surge of emotion, positive or negative. for me, laughing is my worst non-postural trigger.

this is a clip from playing lethal company with friends a few months ago. you can hear the eerie silence of presyncope at 0:19, and the sound at 0:23 is my face hitting the keyboard lmao. I played this for my mother and she literally pissed herself laughing and DEMANDED I show every single person I know (including my doctors, who thought it was funny to see and surprisingly helpful, especially for being audio only).

[charcoaldustonmyfingers]

Free protein lol

Inspired by 1) my childhood dog, who would immediately start chewing faster if anyone noticed him eating non edible things and 2) my brother, who ate a beetle that one time for no other reason than to prove he could.

We also had a moth infestation once when I was a kid, and every time I went to check if the cereal was covered in moths or not, that same brother would tease me to eat it anyways for the extra protein >:p

My childhood dog was a big ol’ Rottweiler! Lovely dog, so gentle even when my ten year old self was trying to pry paper towels out from between his teeth lol

[squidwujun]

"Hey how is it going?"

[lorastyrels]

Got unfinished business, ain't we? Cases to solve, ghosts to help out 🔎

[steelsartcorner]

shadowheart has fallen to the make-everything-hades-game-forever fever... her boons definitely make for the strongest cast builds in the game

others in this style (ish): the dark urge (OC); minthara (bg3), Karlach (bg3), gale (bg3), halsin(bg3), lae'zel (bg3), wyll (bg3), astarion (bg3), kotallo (horizon)

p-please... my pen.... someone take it away

[egophiliac]

NEW BIRTHDAY THEME IS OUT!!!!!!!!!!!

BIRTHDAY SLUMBER PARTY, HERE WE COME

I think the theme is more loungewear than straight-up pajamas, but hey, I'm not complaining! (and -- look, we still have the groovies, I'm not giving up hope for animal kigurumi until I gotta)

[inkskinned]

so while i was writing the book, i became violently suicidal.

this was mostly due to the fact that i had a very bad reaction to some meds and my brain stopped producing any serotonin. also i was in the last semester of grad school where it's actually illegal to feel anything but dread. so it wasn't going well.

somewhere in the fog of it i became aware i needed help. nobody was taking clients or my insurance. i didn't want to do inpatient care - it wasn't right for my needs. there's not really an "in between" stage between "inpatient" and "no care," but i was trying to do the right thing. i was trying to activate the chain of command that was my emergency plan. i knew i needed help now.

i used betterhelp.

i know, i know. i'm a straight-A student and so smart and so clever, how could i ever use something so blatantly bad. to be honest with you, i didn't feel particularly keen on it from the getgo - things that seem too good to be true usually are. also, if something online is free, the price is usually your privacy.

the thing is that there was kind of a global pandemic happening at the time and i worked 5 jobs alongside of being a fulltime student and also like writing a book on the side. it is a miracle that i even thought about getting help. i would love to tell you i had the mental wherewithal to like, process whether this was the right choice for me. mostly i was desperate. i was so suicidal that i was trying to find a reason to stay inside of fortune cookies. i was the kind of suicidal that looks like splatterpaint. i hadn't been that bad in an entire decade.

they took my data. i gave them it freely. somewhere out there, they have a dossier on me. on everything i survived. my story in little datapoints, scattergraphed beautifully.

the first woman told me that really i should be grateful, because (and this is a direct quote): "at least you're not anne frank." i said that i felt that statement was antisemitic, as anne frank's life and experience shouldn't be compared to like, a nonbinary lesbian in western massachusetts. the therapist said that i should try to use lucid dreaming to try to picture myself in an actually scary situation, like running from nazis.

i applied for another therapist. i was willing to accept the possibility that there was a bad apple in the bunch. the next therapist and i even laughed about how inappropriate that statement was. and then, in our next session: the new therapist said if i was struggling with body image issues, i should just work harder on my appearance. she spent 3 sessions in a row talking about how she was grieving, and made me memorize facts about her grandmother so "she can live on through my clients."

i am a three's-a-charm kind of person. okay, so what if the last person made me uncomfortable. i figured it was just a misunderstanding of priorities - she had felt she was sharing with me, i had felt like i had to take care of her. i applied for another therapist.

the last woman asked me to help her pray. she bowed her head. i stared at her, frozen, while she said: lord, i beg you: cure her. take the pain of being gay away from her.

i spent somewhere between 2.5 and 3 months on betterhelp. in that whole time, i was not getting the professional help i so desperately needed, even though i was fucking trying.

in the end, i survived this because i finally could get off the meds that were literally killing me. a request for a real therapist finally went through. i survived because my friends saved my life. because nick let me sob myself dry in his arms. because maddie took the razors out of my room when i asked them to. because grace slept over in my bed for like 3 weeks in a row since nobody trusted me not to hurt myself when i was alone. i survived because i got fucking lucky. because even when i was desperately suicidal, i was too old and too self-aware to take "you need to be prettier" as good advice.

the thing is that there's a 19 year old me who isn't like that. who would have heard "just think about how grateful you should be" and said - oh, i see. i would have assumed that is what it means to be in therapy: the same thing my abusers used to tell me. that i am just pretending and lazy. that i am ugly and unworthy.

betterhelp positioned itself to take advantage of an incredibly vulnerable community. it preys on desperation. it knows it is serving people who are not doing well mentally. it saw that there is a huge need for real, immediate, compassionate mental health care: and then it fucking takes your money and privacy.

i still get their ads on instagram. last night i watched as a woman in a pool pretends to talk to a different woman. they discuss her anxiety.

there's a 19 year old version of me, and she didn't survive this. she was too tired, and drowning. i almost fucking died. this thing almost fucking killed me.

in the ad, the woman playing the therapist takes a note on a clipboard and then nods once, sagely.

i have to admit it's a pretty scene. the steam and light coming off the pool water lands on the actresses. like this, it almost looks baptismal, holy.

[heartorbit]

find another role, carry on the show

[u3pxx]

i guess i had to make with the kimchuck, coward

[gleafer]

@acethatlovesdinos

YOOOOOOHOOOOOOOO!

Someone wanted a Jimbriel Gabby??

IT’S TOUCHING MEEEEEEE!!!!

[corviiids]

cant shut up about this game for even one second

[batcavescolony]

I like fanon and I can enjoy it but like with all those "Tim Drake, the poor little wet cat, gets thrown into another universe and he's adopted cus no one in his universe loves him 🥺" fics are cool and all but it be more canon complaint I'd have to be like "Tim Drake goes through the multiverse to get a moment alone cus he's got so many people that are around him 24/7" he's got super friends, he's got civilian friends, he's got villain friends, he's got villains that are interested in him, he's got bats and other related heros. He'd willing jump into a portal to another universe to get some time to work on a project or something.

[leafwateraddict]

Couldn’t stop thinking about Dust being able to pass as Classic. So I had an idea where Dust replaces Classic in a timeline and steals(?) his partner.

He gets conflicted when he starts actually caring about you… But denial is an easy road to take when there’s seemingly no consequences to your actions.

The reveal i guess. Most normal reaction to learning your partners been replaced for god knows how long and you have no clue where he is.

Now that I think about it I might’ve gotten some inspiration from that one chapter of IJAG by @htsan (iykyk) only a lil bit tho

(Full rambling of the idea + extra sketch cuz i liked the expression) ↓↓

I originally wanted y/n to notice the differences instantly but i think it would be angstier if they didn’t and only noticed like months later >:3