#his Dad and siblings are cooler

[nelkcats]

Conner Phantom, learning to live

It had been a few years since Vlad and Danny had stopped being enemies, years since Amity had been at peace with the ghosts. Danny spent his days teaching his children (he assumed they were his children) about well, everything.

Dan and Ellie had prefabricated knowledge, the halfa couldn't quite get it, but the point was that while they knew who was the creator of the chemistry, they had no idea how to do 2 + 2, so he made it his homework to fill in all the gaps.

No one at Amity blinked at the 30-year-boy-who-was-actually-12 and the 15-year-girl-who-was-actually-4, Danny guessed they had gotten used to the weirdness. One day, Vlad called and pointed out that someone had entered his database a few months ago (apparently he checked his digital security very little when he didn't make "evil" plans) and they had stolen the plans for the cloning capsule. Danny had a bad feeling.

Of course, it was after a month of searching that he found out about Lex Luthor's little "project." To say that he was angry was an understatement; he found the poor Superboy being mind controlled. He felt sad when he remembered Ellie's situation and well, he ended up stealing a clone child and destroying some laboratory. Like old times.

The world did not know of Phantom; Amity was suspicious, almost jealous that their protector could be taken away if they said a word, so they didn't say anything out of the city. It's not like the League did anything when they called. Danny didn't care, less tedious meetings and contingency plans for him. Besides, he wasn't excited about going back to the field if he didn't have to, as long as Amity was safe, the world could be destroyed for all he cared.

He wondered if spending too much time with Dan was affecting him, but in the end he dismissed the thought. Upon arriving home, Superboy had woken up and was being interrogated by the Phantoms. He chose his name to be Conner (sounds good apparently) and agreed to take classes to fill in the gaps of knowledge, just like Ellie, he seemed uncomfortable with the gaps.

The poor boy looked uncomfortable, waiting for the other shoe to drop, but it never did. After finding out whose clone he was, he wondered if they would take him to Superman, but Danny just snorted. By the end of the week, Conner was a Phantom, and he was fine with that. Danny even told him that he could live normally if he wanted to, and the boy happily accepted the offer. Conner didn't want to be a hero, at least not that early, and Danny was happy with his decision.

Danny frowned thinking of all the heroes who would say that is "selfish" for someone with power to not to use it. But he believed that they were doubly selfish. Being a teenage hero wasn't fucking easy. He hugged Conner, welcoming him to the family and within days, the whole town already knew about him (they also knew whose clone he was, but they didn't really care, they weren't snitching).

Curiously, it was Tim Drake who noticed the strange family visiting Gotham (a 23-year-old seemed to be berating a 30-year-old for stealing tires, he snorted at the irony). However he froze when he saw Clark?, but much younger, speaking in Kryptonian and laughing. He called a meeting in the batcave and tried to call the family, but as soon as they saw the expression in his face they vanished from sight.

Hell, he needed to report it to Bruce.

[transgaysex]

slowly realizing that i might have to be the second to last kid to leave this fucking household

[thehighladywrites]

ACOTAR men x reader, meeting your parents

𐙚 summary: the acotar men meet ur parents for the first time, how will it go?

𐙚 warnings: crack, fluff

𐙚 amara’s note: thank u sm for the req anon!!💗 i need cassian so bad i’m not joking 🙁 | based on this req

Rhysand

okay so in my mind there are two ways this could go

either ur parents are scared shitless bc of him or they absolutely adore him

They’re real scared if your parents live in the Hewn City and have only seen Rhysand’s bad side, you know, when he was with Amarantha and just seemed like a real jerk overall

The part where they adore him would come into play if your parents lived in Velaris and witnessed Rhysand's true self, not the facade he presents to his court, but the genuine person behind the mask

I think he would act very nonchalant and act like its a casual thing meeting your parents but he is shitting himself behind the facades

He's just really eager for your parents to like him, so he ends up accidentally over-complimenting your mom, which might make your dad a bit irked.

“Mrs. L/N, your beauty is as radiant as the stars. And your cooking is absolutely divine,” he has a hand on his heart, his famous smirk playing on his lips

“Aw, thank you so very much Rhysand, how very kind of you. I’m glad you like it!” your mom beams at him sweetly

“Alright, Rhysand, let's not get carried away,” your dad mutters, staring daggers at rhys as he gets drags your moms chair closer to him

After a while they grow to love him and your father’s distaste for him lessens

Azriel

it’s kind like rhysand’s situation, your parents score is based on how much they know about him

okay, so if ur parents know he’s the scary night court torturer and spymaster who does dangerous things for his work, he might not be very well liked. not only that but they would be genuinely worried and very scared

but if they only know he works for the high lord, i believe the chance of liking him is big

I think azriel’s calm aura when he’s with you makes him very likeable and trustworthy

Your parents see how much he cares for you, the little things he does for you and they approve

they see the small things he does, like this vid right here

Azriel is actually so fucking nervous, he stalks your parents before meeting them. He knows what your dad likes and he knows what your mom likes. Azriel brings their interests up casually in conversations and see how their faces light up

of course you know about all of this but you let him think he’s slick

Eris

Just like rhys and az, it depends on how much they know ab him.

If this is pre berons death eris, they will probably not like him bc of the way he presents himself

I still think Eris is charming and will win over your parents

He’s an expert on charming people and he uses it when he meets ur parents

he is very respectful, tho not very talkative. He speaks when spoken to basically

He gets very nervous when he is asked questions about your relationship bc if there’s one thing he loves it’s privacy

Eris is super vague, i’m talking one word answer for everything

“So how did you meet?”

“at a meeting.”

“Okay! so whats the story?”

“we fell in love.”

Absolutely melts when ur parents decide to like him bc he has never had any parental figure like him that much except for his mom and he is very happy on the inside when ur parents love him

literally thinks of ur parents as his after a while

Lucien

He is extremely well liked, like right off the bat, they love him

We all now he is prythian’s most charming male

is the type to say “wow i see where my girl gets her beauty from” to your mom and “you raised her well, she is very smart” to your dad

I swear he will flirt with anyone. your brother, your sister, your mom, your dad

he brings gift baskets whenever u visit them and it’s always personalized gifts too

your younger siblings always greet him before you bc they think he’s wayyyyy cooler than u

he just basks in the attention bc slowly ur family basically adopts him and he becomes part of the family very quickly they all love him

Goes on walks with your parents, bakes with them, talks to them, literally becomes their fav in a heartbeat making u a lil jelly

This is SO him and ur mom LINK

Cassian

awww😭 bless his heart he is so awkward

he is so adamant about being liked, he goes all out

i’m talking gets a suit, shaves and gels his hair back even though you say it’s really not that deep

sweating bullets, wings drooping a tiiiiiny amount. not noticeable to anyone but himself

anyway

cassian knocks on the door w flowers for ur mom and his hands are literally sweating

absolutely doesn’t let you touch him in a romantic way. he literally swats of your hand on his bicep, “bae, we can’t do that right here, are you crazy??” he says in ur mind, looking around to see of anyone saw that super scandalous touch

at the dinner table he almost knocks over a glass and drops a fork on the floor

his tie is too tight and he carefully tugs on it for air until you decide it’s too much and take him to your childhood bedroom

“Cas, are you okay? They love you so much, there is really no need to be this nervous.”

“Are you sure they like me? Be honest.”

“Baby, I promise you, if they didn’t, you would know. Now get rid of this tie, pop a button and relax, let me get you a drink.”

After you kiss him and get him a drink, he calms down and goes back to his normal non nervous, lovely self

🏷️: @amara-moonlight @rowaelinsdaughter @redbleedingrose @artists-ally @thelov3lybookworm @clairebear08 @riddlesb1tch @cupidojenphrodite @readychilledwine @berryzxx @fell-in-luvs

[thealtoduck]

My Little Love

Selina Kyle x Son!Reader

Bruce Wayne x Son!Reader

Warnings: Fluff…

BatCat!Bro Masterlist

Summary: Bruce finds out you snuck out again alone at night and decides to follow you…

——

Bruce had just finished up his patrolling for the night when he got a call from Alfred. ”Master Bruce, you wouldn’t happen to know Master Y/n’s wherabouts?” He questioned. ”I thought he was at home, didn’t he say he’d be studying” Bruce said.

”Apparently not, his window was open and we suspect he snuck out again” Alfred explained. Bruce let out an annoyed huff and said ”Track his phone and send me the location”. Bruce made his way to the Batmobile as Alfred sent him the data.

Your location showed on the Batmobile’s map, you were inside a bus and it was moving, Bruce started the car and drove to follow you. The map showed you were on a bridge leading out of Gotham, Bruce wondered what you wee up too. He sped up the car and drove towards the bridge.

After driving for a while he saw your icon had stopped on the map, it had stopped next to an old gas station. Meaning you must’ve gotten off the bus there. Soon Bruce arrived and parked the Batmobile in the gas station parking and got out, you were nowhere in sight.

He walked around the corner of the closed station where he found you, leaning against a wall, back turned to him. Bruce silently made his way behind you and placed a hand on your shoulder. You suddenly turned around with a balled up fist, punching Bruce in his armoured chest.

Which was a mistake on your part. You let out a small wince in pain. ”Don’t sneak up on me, Bruce” you said annoyed rubbing your now bruised fist. ”What are you doing out here?” Bruce questioned plainly. ”None of your business, now go home” you told him.

”I thought Dick talked to you about the whole sneaking out thing” Bruce said. ”I didn’t ”sneak out”, i just left without telling anyone and i had a good reason too” you defended yourself. ”What do you mean, you ”had a good reason too”?” Bruce asked. ”Like i said it’s ”none of your business” now go, i’m waiting for someone” you said looking around. ”Who?” Bruce questioned.

”I think he’s looking for me” a familiar voice spoke up from behind Bruce.

Bruce turned around and was met with Selina, you immediately ran past Bruce and in to your mother’s arms, as you were wrapped in a tight hug. ”Hi, my little kitten” Selina said lovingly in your embrace. ”Selina?” Bruce said suprised.

”Hi Bruce, it’s been a while” she greeted. You and your mom spent about an hour catching up on what the other had been up to, since you moved in with Bruce and the others and since she went on the run. Bruce stood silently and listened, not wanting to interrupt knowing how much you had missed your mom.

”Are you coming home soon?” you asked her hopefully. ”Not yet, they’re still on my tail but as soon as i can, you’ll be first to know, okay?” she explained. ”Okay” you uttered disappointed. ”Y/n, can you give me a moment to speak with your dad?” she asked. ”Sure” you said walking towards the parking lot of the gas station.

”You know, i’ve missed you too, Bruce” Selina said giving him a kiss on the cheek. ”I’ve missed you too, Silena” Bruce said warmly. ”So, how has he been behaving?” Selina asked referring to you. Bruce gave a slight smile and started ”Well…”.

”He’s secretive and tough, he steals from his siblings, he sneaks out without telling anyone, gets in to fights at school and somehow has decided he thinks Black Canary is cooler than me” Bruce explained. ”That’s my boy” Selina said proudly and quickly added ”Our boy”. Bruce smiled turned slightly saddened. ”I think he sees himself mostly as your boy” he said.

”That’s my fault” Selina admitted and continued ”I should’ve introduced him to you sooner and let him get to know his father before just leaving, but he loves you, i can tell”. ”How?” Bruce questioned. ”Otherwise he’d sneak out and not come back” Selina explained.

She and Bruce then walked up to you waiting on the gas station. ”I’ll need to get going soon, Bruce, can you go wait in the car” she said and walked towards you. Selina grabbed you and pulled you in to another tight hug. She then said softly ”Look Y/n, you need learn to trust your dad, i know he’s been gone for 13 years of your life and that was a bad choice on my part”.

”Don’t hold it against him that he wasn’t there for you, okay?” she finished and you nodded. ”Now run along your dad is waiting” she said and put her biking helmet on. She then started her bike and drove off. You went back to the Batmobile and sat down in the passenger seat.

”Sorry, i snuck out again, B-… Dad” you said, the word dad feeling strange in your mouth. ”It’s okay, Y/n, it was ”none of my business” after all” Bruce said jokingly and started the drive home. By the time you two got back to the manor you had fallen asleep resting your head against your dad’s shoulder.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for taking my kid’s bike?

I (37f) have two sons ages 10 and 12 who ride their bikes to school. Recently 10 has got it in his head that helmets are dumb and sweaty and he will not be wearing one. He refuses to put it on when he leaves, and when I make him his brother tells me later that he takes it off as soon as they’re out of sight. 10 doesn’t deny it, and he usually arrives home sans helmet. I told him that we could either get him a new, cooler, more comfortable helmet or he could walk to school. But his brother and the neighbors they ride to school with still told me he was taking it off, and he didn’t deny it, so I took away his bike. He now has to leave early walk to school. I’m not driving him because he’d rather that than bike and I really don’t have time. (I work from home but have a bunch of meetings when the kids are leaving for school).

He is obviously furious and says that it is unfair and stupid. The thing is, I kinda agree with him! I’m basically doing this on the testimony of his pre-teen brother and the neighbor kids, I have no other proof except that he doesn’t deny it when I ask. Instead he makes arguments about why he shouldn’t have to wear a helmet. Eventually he’s going to agree to wear the helmet and start hiding that he’s taking it off, at which point my only way of knowing is if the other kids tell me. And that’s unfair to all of them, I can’t put them in a position where their brother/friend will be punished solely based on what they say.

Their Dad is deployed for a few more months but he agrees with me and backed me up to 10 over the phone. He thinks 10 shouldn’t get the bike back until ‘we can trust him again’ but he admits he has no metric to determine that. My parents think that they were totally justified in letting me and my siblings bike on busy roads without helmets and that I’m overreacting.

(FYI we live in a part of the USA that doesn’t have great bike infrastructure, it’s not like in some places where bikes get their own elevated lanes or barriers, and the kids have to cross a busy road to school).

I’m really torn up about it, especially when he calls me the worst mom ever and says he hates me.

AITA?

What are these acronyms?

[obsidianstrawberrymilk]

A short list of things I would have changed in HoO

It takes place ten ish years after the end of PJO. Percy and Annabeth aren’t a part of the seven but instead appear as cool older mentors to help out the Lost Hero trio. They both have careers and live in New York and go to Sally’s house for dinner every weekend.

Caleo isn’t a thing. In fact, let’s not even mention Calypso. At most we mention she was freed after the last war as idk proof demigods have some power or something.

More than 1 Asian character. Give this one ADHD and dyslexia bc shocker Asian kids can be disabled as well.

For that matter a properly disabled character. I have a deaf OC I would use if I rewrote the series.

Leo is aroace. His arc is about learning that his self worth doesn’t have to be tied to the people around him and his friends love and care about him and he doesn’t need romance to be complete. His flirting is overcompensation bc he doesn’t feel romantic or sexual attraction and is afraid he’ll be alone forever.

Drew and Piper become friends. Drew’s mean girl bullshit is outdated and boring and it would have been a lot cooler to see her icy exterior thaw and her help Piper with her charmspeck (explaining how Piper learned how to use it to begin with) and take on an older sister role

Neither Leo nor Piper become head councilors to their cabins because that’s dumb

Keep the chapter title style from PJO. It was so fun and one of the highlights of the series for me. The relatable nature of PJO in general was kinda lost in HoO and it’s a shame bc there was such a variety of characters for people to identify with there.

Give Reyna a girlfriend or at least a homoerotic friendship that can become an actual relationship in the next series or something

Frank is 14 and he and Hazel aren’t dating, they just have mutual baby crushes on one another.

For that matter what the fuck was ‘Frank is magically not fat due to Mars’s blessing’ bullshit? Frank is a fat character who stays fat but learns to be confident in himself and his body type.

Stop The Adultification of Hazel 2k23. Hazel is 13, she’s the youngest member of the seven and despite her trauma I think that should be obvious. I think emphasizing her relationship with Nico could be fun here - he’s in his 20s so him taking a more ‘that older sibling who toes the line between parent and sibling’ role here could be fun.

Also, I don’t want Hazel to have Hecate’s blessing or whatever. Between her being a magical horsegirl and the daughter of Pluto there’s already a lot of room to expand on her powers that was never used - I think doing more with her cursed jewels and metals powers and her learning the other aspects of her powers, like Shadow Travel, would be fun.

Instead I think having a daughter of Hecate as a part of the Seven would be cool, because we could still have a witchy character with mist manipulation and magic powers.

Give Jason an actual personality, please. Bro’s been a child solider practically since age 2 and has spent his whole life with the weight of other teenagers’ lives on his shoulders as praetor - give him perfectionism issues and anxiety. We’re told that he’s spent his whole life helping others compromise instead of being his own person - show that. Let his arc end with him deciding to try and live a mortal life and find out who he is beyond being a war general.

Show us that Octavian’s a piece of shit, don’t just tell us.

Leo and Piper are the ones who fall into Tartarus. Nothing romantic ever happens but we get heavy emphasis on their friendship and we get to see their grief over Leo’s mom and Piper’s grandfather respectively

Piper’s grandfather has died a few months ago and she cut her hair herself when her dad didn’t want to let her due to that (correct me if I’m wrong but it’s a tradition in Cherokee culture to cut your hair when a loved one dies, correct?), which is why it’s all uneven. A lot of her insecurities stem from going from growing up in rural Oklaholma (not in a reservation bc there aren’t any there) without much money to suddenly being catapulted into a millionaire Hollywood lifestyle and having everyone criticize everything about her and be really racist, all while her Dad drew farther away from both her and her grandfather. Her arc would be reconnecting with both her culture and Dad and learning to find who she is and her self worth again.

They defeat Gaea in a way that isn’t so anticlimactic and fucking stupid

[haesunflower]

meeting the parents with zb1

genre: fluff

pairing: reader (gn) x all members of zerobaseone

about/tags: zb1 is introduced to your parents for the first time

cursing in some, yujin is here platonically, family dynamics, bullet point reactions

⠀⠀ kim jiwoong ⠀⠀

is so confident lol and has every right to be

during dinner, one of his hands lays flatly on your leg because you keep nervously fidgeting in your seat

he doesn't get why you're panicking because it's going so well

you're just nervous because you've never introduced anyone to your family, as jiwoong is your first serious adult relationship

while you're washing the dishes with your mom, jiwoong overhears your conversation and finds out he's the first boyfriend you've ever brought home

"but for the record, i think he's perfect for you y/n."

"i didn't want you to meet anyone i'm less than sure of, jiwoong is definitely the one mom"

⠀⠀ zhang hao ⠀⠀

is a fucking nervous wreck

literally can't think straight and scared he'll say something stupid

so at first, he doesn't really talk at all

you softly squeeze his hand from under the dinner table, just to let him know he's supported

your mom ends up really liking him and tells him he has a gentle soul

"that's one of my favorite things about him, mom"

looks at you fondly smiles

across the table, your parents are reminded of a young version of themselves

⠀⠀ sung hanbin ⠀⠀

is so helpful oh my god

literally sets up the table and helps your mom carry the cooler to the garden

even helps figure out how to work the grill with your dad

your parents are impressed to say the least

your mom whispers to you, "you better marry that one"

hanbin is busy sharing a beer with your dad, toasting to the grill that was now working

he looks back at you and gestures for you to come closer to taste the meat that was grilling – makes sure to blow on it so it's not too hot before feeding you

you're chewing happily, and hanbin is smiling at you with his eyes

⠀⠀ seok matthew ⠀⠀

he is quick to become friends with your dad

they bond over conversations of sports teams and weightlifting, and they disappear into their own world

the rest of your family arrives for the pool party

your dad and mom are throwing water balloons at each other when matthew giggles from beside you and says "that'll be us one day y/n"

you're distracted by his sweet words you don't even realize both of you are being pushed in the pool by your younger siblings

matthew pretends to look offended and starts to playfully chase the culprits

you're smiling to yourself because you can't believe how easily he fits into your family

⠀⠀ kim taerae ⠀⠀

your parents already knew taerae

he grew up next door and was also your first boyfriend

it was literally no problem, no issue 100%

when you wake up at noon, taerae is already dressed and helping your mom prepare for dinner

you're just like./??? when did you get here?

your mom calls you lazy and says she is grateful to have a son-in-law like taerae

he smiles widely at the word son-in-law, dimple on full display

you don't say anything, instead you stand next to him to quietly assist him

the whole thing feels domestic, but you're not complaining

it feels right :)

⠀⠀ ricky ⠀⠀

he ordered flowers in advance for your mom & expensive whiskey for your dad

covered up his tattoos and wore his hair down to look less intimidating

even asked you if he should just dye his hair natural color because he was scared your parents would HATE him

you kept assuring him there was nothing to worry about

ricky is perfect so he nailed it obvi! he didn't show an ounce of nervousness and kept his cool the whole time

your dad jokingly asks him if he should also bleach his hair blonde

you all laugh at the dining table as your mom hits your dad playfully

(your dad isn't joking) (in fact asks ricky to bleach it for him)

you wake up the next day to texts from your dad, it's a selfie of him getting his hair done by ricky

⠀⠀ kim gyuvin ⠀⠀

you're scared that your dad will scare the shit outta him

and for the record, he did

"h-hi sir, it's n-nice to meet you sir" while bowing literally too many times

gyuvin feels like his face is frozen in a forced smile as your dad asks him all sorts of questions about him ,,,, it feels like a job interview

he relaxes when you start drawing small circles on the back of his hand

in the end your dad says "okay you pass, you're pretty decent"

gyuvin takes it as a win and just breathes out a sigh of relief

you excuse yourself to go to the bathroom and while you're gone, your parents sincerely thank gyuvin for making you happy

gyuvin in return thanks them for raising such a wonderful person, and tells them that "loving y/n is the easiest part of my life"

you didn't actually use the bathroom, you just wanted to know what they'll say without you there :') you're soft now

⠀⠀ park gunwook ⠀⠀

is literally so prepared he STUDIED what your parents like by stalking their facebook and took notes while asking you detailed questions about them

just in case, made a whole speech to answer the question "what do you like about y/n?" (he didn't end up using it but he came prepared!)

lol the usual, everyone loves him

your mom barely acknowledges you during dinner and serves gunwook all the best parts of the steak, literally no one hears you ask for someone to pass the potatoes bc they're so engrossed in conversation with gunwook

gunwook hears you though and happily serves you a heaping, whilst responding to your dad's question with ease

your mom smiles at the interaction

at the end of the night he proudly says "i think your parents like me :D" and he's so cute because he looks so satisfied with himself

⠀⠀ han yujin ⠀⠀

(friendship only)

during your recital, your parents think he's some sorta dancing prodigy

which is true because he only started dancing a year ago

at the lobby, you and your parents bump into yujin and his family, and they commend him for doing so well during his solo

when you get home to check the footage from the recital, you're barely in any of "your videos" because it's 70% yujin -_-

A/N: work is killing me guys, i don't know when i'll be able to sit down and just write huhu

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[moodyvoid]

You’re dating Dabi and you want to meet his parents and he wants to keep up his facade with you that he’s not part of the infamous league of villains, so Magne and Mr. Compress dress up and act like his Mom and Dad.

Magne, glaring: “So, what are your intentions with my son?”

Dabi: “A little less intense, Mag.”

Magne: “Show a little respect... Call me Mommy.”

Dabi: “not a chance in hell—“

Mr. Compress: “Wanna see a magic trick?”

Dabi: “No, they don’t want to see a magic trick, Mr.— Dad.”

Mr. Compress pulls a bouquet of roses out of thin air and hands it to you.

Magne, opening a photo album: “Would you like to see his mugshots— I mean, his vacation photos?”

Dabi: “No— Why do you have those?”

—Later on that night—

You: “Your parents are very interesting. Different than I expected.”

Dabi: “I’m adopted.”

You: “I loved meeting your siblings, too.”

Dabi: “My what—“

Twice and Toga both waving from the front door.

Twice: “Nice meeting you!!— You could do way better!”

Toga: “Bring them back soon, Dabi! They’re cooler than you!”

Dabi, deadpanning: “Oh, yeah… my siblings.”

[punkeropercyjackson]

Related to my prev post:

I don't give two shits if Bruce is written like a bad dad if it means we get good writing for everybody else since i think minorities are more important than a white cishet male nepotism baby unlike his butch lesbian counterpart who's judaism is an actual fundamental part of her character and since he's been written as abusive so consistently over the years it's in-character anyway

Dick can be both bi/pan and demisexual and there's more evidence for the latter than the former so making him be sexually loose is aspec erasure and mspec stereotyping and he dosen't have a thing for redheads,he has a thing for black women and to me the only guy he seems to like romantically is Roy and that adds on to his demisexuality since they're childhood best friends

'Catholic guilt Jason' is a shit headcanon that misses the major and critical part of him being Red Hood that he didn't feel the slightest bit bad about killing people and the point of his redemption was learning remorse,afrolatino Jason isn't based on stereotyping but him filling out so many black and latino cultural aspects and if any hcs for him are stereotyping it's the one that he's a slut because he's a very handsome and hot and cute goth punk man

Tim is perfect the way he is and dosen't need power ups or to get 'punished' for the oh so horrible crime of being a realistic teenage boy,he's not JUST huge a loser or a super cool dude but both at once and it's bad writing and fetishistic to ignore his wide range of relathionships that consists of mostly of women to make him a 'guys guy'

Stephanie is heavily autistic and bpd-coded so she's far from a 'normie',much less an 'it girl' but people see blonde hair and blue eyes and throw away everything else about her because that's all she's worth to them or call her an abuser and a pick me just like they do irl bpdtistic women and she's also canonically pastel/indie punk and a Team Mom but gets her presentation switched to basic and made out to be a womanchild instead

Cass had a million times more moral conflict than Jason ever did,would never in her LIFE wanna be feminine even in the chinese way and would be butch in it instead,turning her scattered speech into sign language is ableist not unlike(but not on the same level as)changing Babs' type of wheelchair disability and she'd be a better Batman than any male character in existense

Duke is only a golden child in the sense he has a yellow motif and is as disruptive and authentically quirky as his siblings,We Are Robin is a better team than the canon Outlaws,his powers are cooler than any Al-Ghul ones you could come up with,he has more femme energy than Tim does and Carrie Kelley ain't shit and only gets brought back to replace him because DC is antiblack

Damian's introduction mentality was a result of not only child abuse but also psychological grooming to get him to dehumanize himself and all his bigoted comments are explained either by him being like 12 or his writers trying to demonize brown people and anybody who thinks he's a bad person is a super-sized pissbaby with no sympathy for kids of color,shipping him with Jon is making a bisexual man into a ped0phile and Jay is good even if aging Jon up wasn't and he should be friends with Maya,Suren,Nell,Colin,Kathy,Maps,Tai and Miles,Gwen,Peni,Pavitr,Hobie and Margo from Atsv and Nico and Hazel from Pjo instead of Billy Batson or Danny Fenton or ANY Mcu characters

Talia is super hot but should be drawn in accurate arab clothes instead 'sexy assasian gear'(not that these two can't co-exist but you get what i mean),her personality is extremely rich and her stories are mega interesting,she's a good mom to Damian and literally never 'took advantage of Jason' seeing as That Scene In Lost Days was decanonized by it's writer who said it was ooc for her on his part,she should've been a mom figure to Stephanie in her Robin Days too since they would get along and she deserved her own run where she takes over Lexcorp to transform it into a force for good and become Superfam-adjacent to free herself from having only male connections

[aroacesetitoff]

Infinight Interns Reference Sheet + Headcanons

Bartholomew Finn

-Vest of Slow Descent-i made it green based off his canon design and then gave it "feathered" hems to allude to its ability

-pre-Draconic Transformation Bart-gave him silver jewelry and the only draconic traits are gold freckles, fangs, and shorter horns

-post-Draconic Transformation Bart-gold jewelry to match with his dad (Simsun), and of course claws and scales and larger horns

-boatswain's call whistle-a reference to the Jebediah + Capt. Marge

-gave him the thigh dagger sheath-cause why not. I think Bart's that character in movies that has a shit ton of knives hidden in the most improbable places

-he's got a 17 string lute, but lets be honest i aint drawing 17 strings. painted a wave design on the body and the soundhole/rosette has a dagger design

-Breath Diagem/lute pick ftw

-scars on his hands (from doing hot boi sailor shit)

-not shown but i think he's got a bunch of tattoos (like "I <3 Mom" for Marge, flowers for Gum Gum, crossed anchors, etc.)

-pupils are slitted like dragons and a very dark shade of blue

Kyborg the Mighty/Kydelius of Everwinter

-Fun Fact: i used to do archery! so some of his gear is based off of stuff I had. But you know cooler

-Canonically his hair pretty loose, and its pretty but my god its gonna get caught up in his bowstring man. braided/tied it back for practicality

-thigh highs. no notes

-gave him an armored version w/ fur because his current design didn't feel like Everwinter-y enough

-its not terribly visible but he has the Belt of Sick Trick so i put a bird on it (vaguely Tony Hawk reference)

-the Longer Bow Krystallina-gave it a snow fall design + red accents

-scars from archery, since this guy shoots barebow

-the left (flesh arm) side is the most armored and unscarred, and the right (metal arm) side is scarred + unprotected (bc u know its metal)

-pupils are really dark shade of red as a reference to the Source Diagem

-metal arm-i took an anatomy class not a robotics one, so the structure is based off human musculature (kinda) and i put the Source Diagem in his shoulder instead of his hand

Gum Gum Galindor

-star boi 🌟

-constellations on the inside of the brim of his hat that Bart sewed for him-(Bart's a sailor, he knows his constellations)

-the flowers (orange @ blue) on his hat represent him & Bart. The orange ones bigger bc u know thats his big bro right there

-the hoodie+pauldron+cross body strap combo is a direct copy of Bart's design bc thats what younger siblings do u know

-made the patches to repair his coat stars bc why not

-Random Axe of Kindness-the cute lil heart does not detract from the fact that its an axe

-timeskip design i went for a gardener vibe bc he works in the Orchidnage now-i think despite having the worst dad of the group, Gum Gum would be a pretty good father figure

-Staff of Flowers-i wanted to reference Dia w/ this one so I tried to have this be the most colorful part

-Bart pierced his ears at one point

-i gave him constellation freckles that showed up post Dia reveal

-he has his manacles yeah but i wanted to design friendship bracelets for the rest of the team

-Mudd's-green thread with pink & white flower beads-the charm is Gumbo

-Bart's-leather cord with blue & gold beads and an anchor charm

-Kyborg's-brown leather cord, green beads, and a red arrow charm

-made his pupils a lighter shade of blue that glows when he uses Wild Magic

-edit: lots of scars, some from fighting, a lit from just tripping and shit. Also a dog bite from that one time

Mudd Bramblecrack

-i love him but it was so hard to come up with a design

-the pink streak keeps moving bc im inconsistent and also bc he has to redye/cut his hair constantly

-the "fur" cloak is the Cloak of the Secluded Garden, and its actually pine leaves & grass

-gave him a very simple tunic w/ a bramble design bc we would try to disguise his noble bg

-i put Mudd in a kilt bc i have free will and also he's Scottish. I dont think he would ever wear one unless for formal occasions tho bc i think they take a while to put on

-Gumbo :) + badger armor -this ones very specifically inspired by Lonna Bowstripe from the Redwall series

-originally had the purple gems on his tunic, made em earrings instead bc thats cooler

-Bramblecrack signet (?) ring-also the Virtues Diagem. Both this and his earring are purple bc its an ace reference (for me). The ring is definitely an ace reference bc i made it a black metal and put it on his right middle finger (ifykyk)

-pink paw pads + talons-less of a firbolg thing, more of a Moon Druid thing

-eyes are a rlly dark shade of green but glow a brighter shade when Wildshaping

-pupils are a rlly dark shade of purple (Diagem ref) and also horizontal like cows

Okay I think that's everything. If not ill just come back and edit it 🤷. working on the OG Infinights next so stay tuned or whatever

[notjustjavierpena]

Three Times You Didn’t Kiss Joel - And One Time You Did (Part I)

A/N: Enjoy the beginning of a four chapter fic, where a cute summer romance starts! This is the same universe as Hurried Morning but before! Chapter two and three are just waiting to be posted. See my masterpost for all chapters.

Summary: Joel helps you restore your grandparents' house over the summer. He has big strong arms.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Reader/You (No y/n)

Tags: +18 no smut but mature thoughts (minors DNI), pining, summer romance, DILF Joel, sexual tension, idiots in love

Word count: 2.8k

Link to this work on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/47914783/chapters/120803500

Chapter One: Introductions

The house had been empty for a while when you had moved in. The location was good, somewhat quietly charming as the suburbs were, but the house’s neglect called desperately for a loving hand to bring out that charm again, which had been allowed to fade for too long. It wasn’t that the house had been willfully neglected by you, no you had wanted the house for a long time, but the whole scenario of you ending up here had been long and ridiculous: Your older brother had finally, out of the goodness of his heart, offered it to you, but only after a few years of having been in doubt about whether or not to move into it with his family. He had only gotten first say in the fate of the old place, because he was the oldest of the two of you, a thing that he liked to remind you of. 

The house was overly suburban, missing only a wisteria bush and a fresh coat of paint, additionally, perhaps, a good amount of effort put into the garden as well. It was going to be a time-consuming summer project, but one that you were excited about because of its potential end result.

The house was all paid off by your grandparents, but after the passing of your grandfather some years ago, your grandmother had felt like the house was too overwhelming to live in all by herself, so she had found some place smaller and left the fight of inheritance to your mother, who had then passed it onto you and your sibling. The fact that you had now won that fight was ironic; you would end up alone in a house that your grandmother found too overwhelming to be alone in. 

You step out of your car after parking it in the driveway, walking around its back to open the trunk and start unloading its contents. It is half your latest salary worth of a Home Depot haul.

You head to the garage door, knowing that your grandfather used to have a workbench inside and you need tools to assemble some of the things you have bought, amongst other a stepladder that you hope to build without too much trouble. 

Though the lock at the bottom of the garage door is already doing its job of causing trouble, and you curse quietly as you have to put everything onto the ground at your feet to use both hands on it. The lock struggles for a moment but then clicks, and you finally pull up the garage door until you can duck underneath it with ease.

You get a feeling of someone watching you as you drag two buckets of white paint into the garage, following with a new set of brushes and paint rollers.

The feeling grows stronger as you reemerge from the garage and you start to hear muffled voices nearby too, but you ignore it due to how much you have scheduled for today. Additionally, you would admit in all honesty that you would be staring at the single woman neighbor too, if she was struggling with the garage door and making a fool of herself. You push your curiosity away and reach into the car trunk again. 

“Hey,” it’s the voice of a teenage girl. You jump and nearly hit your head against the roof of the vehicle, and she chuckles a little in a way to seem cooler than she is, “Oh, sorry! Didn’t mean to scare you, but you just looked like you needed a little help and I wanted to offer. Well, my dad told me not to.”

“It’s alright, I’m grown. I can handle myself,” you stand up a little straighter to properly look at the teenager, giving her a smile to reassure her that you’re cool too. She’s around fifteen, kindest eyes you’ve ever seen in a girl her age, a mess of curls and her thumbs tucked into the belt loops on her jeans. She looks shy, but something tells you that she isn’t. You realize that you are staring, then hold out a hand and introduce yourself.

“I just moved in, inherited the place from my grandparents,” you add as the teen shakes your hand.

“I’m Sarah, we live just a house away. There,” she points to a nearby home, where a man is standing against one of the posts on the front porch. He has his arms crossed over his chest but you’re too far away to read his expression. Sarah continues, “Oh, right, that’s my dad. Yikes, that stance makes him look like a jerk.”

“Perhaps a little,” you laugh genuinely and Sarah beams at your approval. She raises her arm and waves her father over, who protests against it at first by waving his arms no, but then capitulates and walks over to you. 

“Joel Miller,” he states as he approaches, holds out his hand and you repeat your name, trying to grab his hand for a shake, but it ends up the other way around with the size of his palm. Joel’s hands are huge and rough, calloused in a way that makes you guess that he doesn’t sit in an office all day. He has a firm grip, and you catch yourself watching the way that the muscles of his underarm flex when he holds your hand in what feels like an instant.

He doesn’t notice you staring at all, but you wonder if it’s because he is so used to it; Joel Miller is gorgeous, scruffy and sexy in his washed-out jeans and a simple army green t-shirt. You wish that you had worn something other than your dark blue t-shirt with a Batman logo, but a sundress would not have been practical for assembling stepladders and carrying tools.

“We were wonderin’ when we were gonna see someone move in,” he speaks with a Texan accent. It suits him very well, “I’ve wanted to paint the surface several times last summer, would be a shame to have it crack if you had the opportunity to save it.”

“I could use some help, honestly. My grandma moved somewhere smaller because it was too much work to be alone here,” you run a hand over your hair, brushing a strand behind your ear. Sarah looks from you to her father, and then back to you again. 

“Maybe that’s our summer vacation!” She exclaims. Joel turns quickly towards her.

“Sarah, honey,” he warns but she just continues without a hint of hesitation, sporting childlike enthusiasm and innocence. 

“But you said that we needed something to do together this summer, and we couldn’t afford a trip somewhere,” she reasons excitedly, “This is perfect. Very movie-esque, you know.” 

“But it’s not our house,” Joel adds, smiles at you apologetically and makes your pulse spike. 

“But she says she needs help,” she doesn’t let it go. It’s sort of sweet, “Come ooon, dad.”

“I do actually need help,” you back her up. 

“You don’t have a boyfriend who knows how to swing a paint brush? Or who you’ll hurt by not letting him do the heavy lifting?” Joel asks casually. Sarah scrunches up her nose beside him. 

“Nope, no boyfriend with a masculinity complex,” your cheeks blush a little as Joel chuckles, hidden by a smile as you shake your head no. You wish you did have a guy in your life, but right now only so you could see if there’d be any detectable disappointment on Joel’s face when you said yes.

Joel reaches up to scratch his beard. He looks like he is weighing the pros and cons, but a part of him also drags out the anticipation to tease his kid. He smirks, “Fine then, but you better be up early every day for a day’s hard work, Sarah Miller.” 

“Oh, he used your whole name. You’re in trouble now,” you point out with a grin. Joel eyes you from beside you.

“Yes! Better than summer camp,” Sarah removes her fingers from the belt loops of her jeans to grab her father’s arm and press her forehead against it, “Thank you.”

“You’ve never been to summer camp,” Joel rolls his eyes but wraps an arm around his daughter. 

“I sleep in though, so don’t come knocking at eight in the morning,” you point out. 

“Dad sleeps in too, don’t worry,” Sarah keeps going. 

“Sarah, what’s wrong with you?” Joel is the one who looks embarrassed now. He pushes her gently away, “Go back home, kid. Let the grown-ups sort out the details. You can call for pizza, yeah?” 

“Ugh,” you hear her say to her father but she gives you a sweet smile, “Nice to meet you.”

“You too, Sarah,” you reply but she’s already walking away with her back towards you. Joel, on the other hand, doesn’t move from his spot in front of you, suddenly stuffing his hands in his pockets and almost entirely mirroring Sarah’s stance from moments before.

“Tell me what you need help with?” It’s meant more as a question or a suggestion than a command. 

“Right,” you wonder how long you have been staring at his mouth. It’s been a while since you’ve been kissed, so you allow yourself the fantasy of Joel Miller being interested in kissing you. His beard tells you that it’s been a day too many since he would normally trim it, and you can almost imagine the feeling of the hairs tickling your chin and jaw as he kisses your mouth and neck—

Stop. 

“Well, I have some work to do on the house facade,” you blurt out after the silence has gone on for too long.

“Clearly,” Joel nods in acknowledgement, crossing his arms over his chest and spreading his legs a little where he is standing. Like this, he looks like he is a good listener, “I should see if I can find some cheap but good wood protection, looks like it’s going to be more expensive in the long run if it doesn’t get some kind of coat.”

“That’s so nice of you,” you give him a soft smile. It is confirmed then; the man is clearly not the office-type with how he talks about restoring the construction of the house to its peak. 

He goes on: “Don’t worry about it, yeah? I’m sure you can pay me with hot dinners for Sarah and I or something. I can do this, the work on the house, but I’m terrible at getting her to eat other things than takeout with my normal schedule.” 

Suddenly very open. Interesting. 

“I wouldn’t mind that, no. It’s going to be a lot of dinners though. I have a whole lot of ideas,” you reply, still trying to not drop your gaze to his mouth again as he talks, “Garden needs to be weeded out, replanted, lawn mowed— oh, you don’t have a lawnmower, do you?” 

“Sure do,” he answers, nodding towards his house, “I can get it. You need help with that now?” 

*

You blame the Texan sun for how breathless you feel as you have time to really look at him. He has his hands on the handle of his old lawnmower, gripping firmly to the point of unintentionally showing off his biceps in the form-fitted shirt that he wears as he pushes the lawnmower around the wild grass. 

You are sitting on the back porch, legs crossed with a screwdriver in hand and the instructions to the, by now, stupid stepladder. You’re more creative than practical, and it shows in the way that you tighten one screw but the stepladder still wobbles as you test it out. 

Frantically, you go through the instruction manual front to back and then back to front until you accidentally rip the thin paper, but you don’t feel any smarter about what you are doing. You throw the screwdriver onto the wooden boards beneath you, fighting the urge to scrape a bad word into the grayish wood. 

You lean back on your arms and close your eyes almost all the way, soothing yourself by taking in the sun and letting yourself look at Joel work without him noticing too much. Your eyes travel down his frame, looking at the jeans that have green patches around the base of the legs before going upwards again. You try to convince yourself that looking at his clothes makes up for how you’re ogling him now.

Subconsciously, you stretch out your legs from underneath you, then cross one leg over the other and lean further back on your elbows instead. Joel’s knuckles are slightly white from gripping the lawnmower and his t-shirt has started to form a patch of sweat at the base of his spine, supposedly caused by sweat dripping from the back of his neck because the hair there is damp. You curl your toes a little, press your thighs together. You want to know how strong those hands are, how they work at his daytime job, which you guess by now has to do with construction work. It feels wrong to think these things, but you allow them as long as they don’t leave your head. 

You close your eyes fully then, not needing to feel even more warmth prickle at your skin, radiating from your core instead of being caused by the sun. You lay like this until the lawnmower stops. 

“Woah, what happened here?” Joel walks over and looks down at you and then to the crime scene you’ve left open on the back porch flooring. You stare at him with a sheepish expression on your face as he shields the sun from you with his body. 

“It didn’t want to do it the way that I wanted,” you simply say.

“Remind me not to piss you off,” he jokes and shifts where he stands until the sun hits your eyes again. You grin up at him, holding a hand over your eyes to not be forced to close them and miss how he looks as he smiles back.

“Thanks by the way,” you add a moment later, “I’m honestly happy that I don’t have to do it myself.” 

“Yeah, no problem… Look, I’m gonna go back to Sarah, have a shower, then the pizza that’s probably cold by now,” he lingers for a moment before starting to move.

“Sorry about the pizza,” you say and start to get up again, leaving behind the mess of screws, ripped pages and stupid tools. 

“All good, I think Sarah will forgive me. She likes you,” he waves back at you as he leaves. You wave after him too, something feeling like it’s about to implode inside of your stomach and you know what it is. It is butterflies. It is the beginning of a crush.

In the morning, you find the stepladder assembled to perfection on your back porch. 

[xecutivecucumber]

Executive Cucumber's thoughts on the Bad Batch: Season 3x06 and 3x07 (I'm pretty sure I'm formatting this differently every time. Oh well)

Okay, there's a subject I'm going to have to postpone until the end of the post because I want all my thoughts on that to be together: the main operative clone. And the rest might be slightly out of order. I'm also doing this before I see anyone else's thoughts, just so we get the pure version.

Let's go!

I honestly thought that Senator Singh and Riyo were dead meat. But no, they're fine because REX IS COOLER THAN ANYONE. Ugh that man. Freaking throwing the grenade back at him.

Clones are beautiful. That is all.

THAT'S THAT ONE PLACE FROM THE OG CLONE WARS MOVIE!!! TETH!!!

Howzer I love you but if you touch Crosshair we will be having words.

I am actually really proud of Crosshair and his restraint this episode. He could have been really cutting to Howzer.

OMEGA WITH THE TOOTHPIIIIICKS and Hunter is jealouuuus

EDIT: ECHO AND THE CROSSBOW HE'S SO SWEET

WHAT DID THEY DO TO YOU CROSSHAIR

It's really nice to see normal clones being normal again. (Too bad it doesn't last)

There's something up with Omega. I'm not going to lie, I think that she and Rex are going to plan to get her captured in order to track her back to Tantiss.

HOWZER STOP DISTRUSTING CROSSHAIR THIS MOMENT

I appreciate that Hunter doesn't seem to distrust Crosshair during this point.

...they really shouldn't have brought that operative back.

Rex is considering stealing Omega, I swear. I love that he gets down to her level.

WOOOOOOOOOOOLFFE (Plo would be so disappointed in you)

It's...odd to see these normal troopers with him.

It's also strange that he cannot comprehend that the clones could be traitors at first.

STOP DYING YOU BEAUTIFUL REGS

'She only bites half the time' I'm pretty sure Omega is lying here but I don't care.

CROSSHAIR IS SUCH A WORRIED DAD HOLY CRAP. 'Oh, I'm much worse' I LOVE YOU

And this just gives such a little insight into how the Batch was when they were together. I have a feeling that Crosshair was a fusser and a nagger.

And I love how Howzer's natural and correct conclusion is: 'no one evil could love that child.' (Unless you're Nala Se)

Hey, actual candor from Crosshair. I keep saying this is who he always was under it all, but I do think he's healed somewhat, at least towards regs. The healing power of Omega.

'Too bad' I LOVE THIS MAN

STOP DYING REGS

Rex talking down Wolffe reminded me so much of him trying to talk Jesse down. So ow.

Okay, what ROCK have they shoved Wolffe under for the last YEAR??? YES THE EMPIRE WOULD GET RID OF THE CLONES YOU DOG BRAINED IDIOT

(Plo would be proud that you let them go)

...they just killed all of Rex's clones, except Howzer and Gregor. And I have a bad feeling about Howzer. STOP TAKING THINGS FROM REX HASN'T HE LOST ENOUGH???

Okay here we are, at the big topic. Hold onto your pants.

That operative clone. Is. Tech. Because if he is not, they are purposefully using the narrative to deceive us.

I might miss a few things, but that's because I'm up past my bedtime and I've been up too late the last few days.

1. The falling and water parallels. This clone falls a LOT during this episode and dives into a lot of water. He even falls into mist. This time it's to kill and capture his siblings instead of save them.

2. The injury. This clone is hobbling around a lot after his injury, which was immediately reminiscent of Tech's broken leg at the beginning of season 2. Both of them are forcing themselves past their limit to achieve a mission. Specifically with injured legs.

3. General attitude and demeanor. In combination with the stealth and injury, this clone has a more hunched posture. His speech patterns are more formal, though we haven't really heard a lot of other clone operatives talk with their helmets on. But he's also apparently allergic to orders. I first thought that he'd be out of the chain of command, but they would have told Wolffe that he wasn't in charge of the operative if that were the case. Or the operative would have straight up told him 'I don't take orders from you' instead of staring awkwardly at him. Instead he runs off and does his own thing. While injured. Not to mention the buttons on his gauntlet. The other clone operatives don't have those.

4. The cybernetic legs. Now we don't know for sure if Tech would have cybernetic legs, but it seems likely for a severely injured trooper. And when Crosshair is looking at the heat signature, you can see that his legs are blue instead of yellow or red. No heat. Not organic.

5. What he says to Crosshair. 'You could have been one of us.' 'You chose the wrong side.' Yes, he's talking about Crosshair resisting the re-education. But flip it on its head real quick. 'You could have been one of us. One of the Bad Batch.' 'You chose the wrong side. The Empire.' Those lines very easily have double meanings.

6. An interesting one is when he starts moving rocks after the explosion. Why would he do that? Why not immediately go find another way in? He's moving only the smaller rocks. There's a large one in the way that he couldn't move himself. And he doesn't get the rest of the troopers to come move it when they arrive. He almost seems confused.

Like he's somewhere else after an explosion, having to move rocks. Like in the Crossing.

I know that this hardly seem like iron clad evidence. But in the language of story telling, it's practically screaming in our faces.

And I'm so glad he's back. I missed him. He won't be himself for a while, but I legitimately believe we'll get one last fight with the Batch all together. Because brain washing is a heck of a lot easier to fix than being dead.

My sister is doing the good work and creating a tik token about it, and I'll probably share it here when she's finished.

(We're getting the episode 'Identity Crisis ON MY BIRTHDAY and so help me if that's about Tech)

Honestly I thought I'd be more excited, but I spent the entire two episodes forcing myself into not having expectations and also I might be in shock.

[badass-queer-couples-battle]

Sword gays showdown, round 1, bracket two

Propaganda:

For Dave:

(tw meteors and child abuse) after being cloned by his best friend, dave is sent on a meteor to earth (with a pony), where he is found by his "bro" (actually kind of his dad). bro proceeds to SPEND THE NEXT 13 YEARS OF DAVES LIFE beating the everloving shit out of him, and also teaching him the use of the blade. as a result dave becomes very good at strifing, and his strife specibus is swordkind (basically he is Assigned Sword By Universe-Destroying Game). he goes to space and meets aliens and has a bisexual crisis! yeah thats right the blond guy with sword symbolism is BISEXUAL we keep on winning and dave deserves to win this poll too

his swords are sharp and awesome and are swords. 

Dave uses Multiple swords throughout canon. Starts with a katana, switches to a broad sword, and alchemizes multiple variations of said broadsword! Not to mention his entire story arc is about coming into himself and that includes into his sexuality. Bisexual Dave truther for the win  

Bi and gay sibling solidarity 

For Ahsoka:

Girl weilds not one but TWO lightsabers! Look at her go! I know a lot of her fans headcanon her as LGBTQ, especially cuz there's some episodes (especially episodes 5-8 of season 7) where her interactions with other women really give off those vibes. Anyway, back to her swordiness - she kicked Maul's robotic ass even tho he's older and has more experience than her, she demolishes the Inquisitors when she's older in Rebels, and just. Her cute little tricks and quips! I love her.

[alyswritings]

JJ X sister maybank reader please, she catches her brother with another girl and he tells her to get out when really she needed him the most. She then goes to kie and sarah.

Y/N sniffles as she gets back to the chateau, wiping at her tears. She looks around for her brother, going into the guest room that they use, opening the door, stopping when she finds JJ and a girl making out on the bed, JJ shirtless.

"Jesus! Y/N, what the fuck?" JJ questions the thirteen year old.

"I-- sorry. I just... I-I needed to talk to you." Y/N says.

"Well, do it later. Leave." JJ hisses.

"But, J--"

"Go." JJ growls, giving her an annoyed look, and he gently shoves her out of the room, shutting the door in her face, and she hears the lock click.

"Who the hell was that?" She hears the girl ask.

"Just my sister." JJ says. "Now, where were we?" The room goes silent and Y/N knows they went back to making out already. She huffs, feeling more tears fall down her face and she storms out out of the chateau.

Y/N quietly cries while sitting on the hammock as she thinks of what to do. She goes over to the shed and finds John B's old bike. After testing it, she gets on and pedals away.

Finally reaching Kie's house, Y/N jumps off the bike. She manages to climb up the side of the house, not wanting to risk having to make small talk with Kie's parents.

Reaching Kie's window, she knocks on the window. After a moment, Sarah is walking over, her eyebrows furrowed at the younger Maybank sibling. Sarah slides the window open.

"Y/N? What are you doing here?" Sarah asks.

"I, uh... is Kie here, too?" Y/N asks.

"Yeah. Yeah, come on." Sarah steps aside, letting the younger girl climb in.

"Y/N? What's up?" Kie asks.

"I, uh... can I stay here for a bit? Just, like, the night or maybe or something?" Y/N asks.

"Yeah. Yeah, of course. Why? Is something wrong?" Kie asks.

"Everything." Y/N mumbles. "My dad, my history teacher is out to get me, those kids are picking on me again." She lists, sitting on the bed, her eyes watery. "I went to JJ, but-- but he was making out with a girl and he kicked me out." She sniffles.

"Oh, baby." Kie sympathetically sighs, hugging her. Sarah frowns, sitting on Y/N's other side and rubbing her back.

"Why is your history teacher out to get you?" Sarah asks.

"He always humiliates me somehow. It's not my best class and when he demonstrates bad grades, he always uses my stuff. And I failed an essay the other day and he made me read it out loud so other kids would know what not to do."

Kie rolls her eyes at the teacher, her jaw clenching, wanting to protect the girl she views as a little sister.

"What about the kids?" Sarah asks.

"Just stupid comments that shouldn't bother me, but do. They made me spill my lunch yesterday. And please don't ask about my dad. You already know that kind of shit."

"I'm sorry, sweetie." Sarah frowns.

"How long has this been going on?" Kie asks.

"I mean... it kind of always does. It's just been worse the past couple of weeks." Y/N says.

"Well, we can have a girls night. Nails, movies, games, annoying gossip. Completely forget about all the shitty things in life, unless you're up for an amateur therapy session. How's that sound?"

"Good." Y/N smiles a little and nods.

- - -

The next afternoon, the three get to the chateau, always hanging out there as usual. They're all outside and getting ready to go out on the boat. JJ goes into the chateau to get drinks and snacks, Sarah and Kie following him.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Kie sneers, smacking JJ over the head.

"Ow!" JJ cries out, holding his head.

"You ditched your little sister for a hookup, JJ? Really?" Sarah asks.

"What the hell are you talking about?" JJ asks, putting some beer in the cooler.

"Y/N. She said she tried to talk to you yesterday, but you were making out with a girl." Kie says.

"Yeah. So?" JJ asks.

"So, she needed you, you fucking idiot." Kie hisses.

"What are you talking about?" JJ asks.

"She really needed somebody yesterday. But you chose a random chick over her." Sarah says.

"Well, she didn't say she anything. All she said was she had to talk." JJ says, shrugging.

"She didn't look sad or anything?" Kie asks.

"I-- I don't know. Maybe." JJ says. "I had other things on my mind." He chuckles and Kie smacks him over the head again. "Ow!"

"Look, leave her alone on the boat, cause if she starts talking she'll probably start crying, but when we were are back on land, you apologize to your little sister and you listen to her." Kie orders, a finger pointed in JJ's face sternly.

"Yes, ma'am." JJ salutes her.

"I'm serious, JJ." Kie states.

"Me, too. All right, I will. What was bothering her, anyway?" He asks.

"Bullies, history teacher, and your dad." Kie lists.

"History teacher? Come on, that prick again?" JJ groans.

"Yes. The teacher who should definitely not be a teacher." Kie says.

"Okay, okay, I'll take care of her later." JJ says, ignoring the guilt forming in the pit of his stomach.

- - -

JJ did subtle things to watch out for Y/N while on the boat. He gave her drinks even when she didn't ask for one, made sure to notice when she was tired or hungry.

They're back at the chateau and Y/N is inside and making a sandwich. JJ goes inside, slowly walking over.

"Hey." JJ greets, standing across from her on the other side of the counter.

"Hi." She mumbles, spreading the peanut butter on her sandwich.

"So, um... what, uh, what'd you wanna talk about yesterday?" JJ asks.

"Doesn't matter." Y/N dismisses.

"Right." JJ mumbles. "Look, Y/N, I-I'm sorry for kicking you out. Okay? I-- I wasn't in the, um... the big brother mindset. I'm really sorry. I should've noticed you were upset." He says.

"Thanks, I guess." Y/N mumbles.

"Look, um... Ki-Kie told me what you were upset about." JJ says.

"And she's the only reason you're apologizing?" Y/N assumes.

"No. No, I'm apologizing because I feel bad, kiddo. Really, I'm sorry. I promise to never prioritize a hookup over you ever again." JJ says.

"Okay." Y/N mumbles.

"So, uh... do you wanna talk about it?" JJ asks.

"Not right now. I don't really wanna cry right now, so." Y/N says.

"Right. Can I at least beat somebody up?" JJ asks and Y/N smiles a little.

"You'd get sued if you beat up my history teacher." Y/N notes.

"Well, I'm sixteen. It's still not really completely inappropriate for me to beat up some thirteen year olds." He smiles.

"Jayje..." She gives him a look. "I appreaciate the thought, but that's not gonna help anything. It'll only make them hurt me worse, my history teacher would probably sue us or get you expelled or something."

"I'm cool with that." JJ says.

"We're broke enough, don't you think?" Y/N retorts.

"I got a job." JJ shrugs.

"JJ." Y/N gives him a look.

"Alright, alright, alright, okay." JJ holds his hands up. "Fine. No violence." He gets up and walks over to her. "But if you change your mind..."

"Call our designated fighter, yeah, I know." Y/N says.

"Anytime." JJ hugs her, giving her a noogie.

"JJ." She whines, pulling out of his grasp. JJ laughs and gets some peanut butter off her sandwich. "JJ!" She complains again, watching him laugh as he eats the peanut butter.

"You love me." JJ grabs her head and kisses her on the cheek.

"No, I don't." She argues.

"Yes, you do." He ruffles her hair, grabbing a beer and going outside.

Taglist: @glxwingrxse @venomsvl @wildieflower @aliciacat20 @allyson15 @gabbylovesreading @itsmaneskinbitch @ironmaiden1313

[hobiebrownismygod]

So on one of my recent posts about Hobie, I got this comment from @unnecessary-account and I thought it was really interesting.

Miles has a connection with the Prowler

That's already been established (Prowler Miles)

We know that Uncle Aaron was the Prowler and he was a 'bad guy' and all that. We know that the Prowler in ITSV was supposed to be a bad guy, with his scary theme, the fact that he worked for Kingpin, and the fact that he was trying to kill Miles until he found out who was under the mask.

But the Hobie Brown Prowler is different.

Hobie Brown was a really smart kid who grew up in a really crappy family. His father left when he was a baby and his mom was an alcoholic. He had 9 siblings and all of them were basically forced to raise themselves.

In order to support himself, he became a window-cleaner who used his intellect to build gadgets to make his job easier. When he was eventually fired, he turned to a life of crime, where he would steal money from the Daily Bugle.

But after a confrontation with Spider-man, he realizes this life of crime sucks and he actually becomes an anti-hero. Spider-man even comes to him for help every once in a while and Hobie joins the Silver Sable group, a group of anti-hero mercenaries that includes Sandman.

"The Prowler gives me control over my own life-- and power. Power I can use to protect the helpless."

The Prowler Issue #1

The Prowler gives Hobie power over himself and his identity

It gives him control over his own life and his own future

Now lets connect this to Spiderman Hobie

Hobie advocates for freedom and free speech. He would want people to have control over themselves and their future. He actively fights against a fascist dictatorship in order to provide human rights for all the citizens of London

Being Spider-man means having the freedom to do these things

Having that mask on means being the voice of the people

That's what being Spider-man is to Spiderman Hobie

Now lets connect this to Miles

The first thought Miles has when he sees Hobie is "Damn. He's way cooler than me."

He's jealous of Hobie, not just cuz he's close with Gwen, but because he's an older boy who knows what he wants, does what he wants, and doesn't have to worry about other people's perceptions of him.

He's the definition of cool

Miles in the meanwhile is struggling to balance his classes, struggling to keep his identity a secret and feeling completely alone in his world

He's struggling with anxiety, panic attacks, maybe even a little bit of depression from what we saw in The Spider Within

He's struggling with the meaning of Spider-man

He's working so hard to protect his city, help the helpless, to fill those shoes that the original Peter Parker left behind. Hobie Brown's Prowler does the same thing, where he takes inspiration from Spider-man to fuel himself and his goals

Miles doesn't have control over his own life. At the end of ATSV, he doesn't even have control over his own future or his own fate.

Hobie Brown wanted control and power. Hobie Brown became the Prowler to have control and power.

Miles Morales wants control and power. Miles is fighting against his canon event because he needs that control over his future and he needs that power in his life.

Because both Spider-man and the Prowler are good people that have been put in tough situations.

And both of them want control over their own lives

Miles and the Hobie Brown Prowler share that connection. Spider-man in general shares that connection with the Prowler. I think that's pretty cool.

This analysis was kinda all over the place, mb 😭

if something doesn't make sense I'm happy to explain it though

Sources under the cut:

[mixelation]

hello yes i wrote team disaster babysitting. deidara pov because why not. i'm thinking AFTER their chunin exams (which they fail) so they're still sort of hanging out as a genin team but there's a somewhat established rapport with the Uzumaki-Namikaze social cloud, for example they've at least interacted with kakashi a few times

Deidara found himself alone in the mission office on a Friday morning. He’d volunteered to go while Tori and Itachi waited in line for breakfast, because waiting in line was for idiots. Also, he liked to be the one to pick missions. Tori wildly underestimated what she could handle, and Itachi picked missions based on what omiyage he could bring back to Sasuke. Nerds. 

“Hokage-sama requested your team specifically,” the desk-nin told Deidara. 

“Oh yeah?” Deidara asked, accepting the scroll. “Any idea what it is?”

With their team, it could range from anything to some insane and super fun S-rank down to a D-rank where someone fucked up the fuinjutsu trap on their front door and needed an expert to undo it, like the ninja equivalent of using your keys. Well. An S-rank wouldn’t come in a regular scroll. But it could be a B-rank…

The desk-nin just stared back at Deidara. “That’d be against protocol.”

Whatever. Boring. 

It would look bad for other people to see Deidara open the scroll without his team, so he hurried out of the office, dodging around a half-asleep chunin. As soon as he stepped out of the office proper, Hatake Kakashi of all people melted out of the fucking wall. 

“What the fuck,” Deidara swore at him, barely avoiding running right into him. 

“Hello there, my adorable ninja sibling,” Kakashi said, stepping right in his way. “I see you have a mission scroll. Have you opened it yet?”

Kakashi was grinning at him, so hard his one visible eye was crinkling. Also, only Kushina-sensei ever referred to them as “ninja siblings,” because that wasn’t a thing. Something was up. 

“It’s bad form to do it without your team,” Deidara replied slowly, hackles raised. When had Kakashi ever shown interest in their missions before they had a chance to go spectacularly wrong? 

“Oh, yes, good, good…” Kakashi said vaguely. “Well, I hope you three have fun.”

He disappeared in a whirlwind of leaves. What the fuck, indeed. 

Deidara ducked into the bathroom on the second floor to open the scroll. It wasn’t like it was illegal for him to do it– Konoha was just really into all their genin doing things together and blah blah blah. Whatever. 

The mission parameters of the scroll were actually quite short, which either meant something so classified they couldn’t print things, or the most boring mission possible. 

A big blue D ranking glared up at him. So it was the latter. Blegh. 

Babysitting…? 

xXx

“Not Kakashi-nii-san?” Naruto whined. “Dad, you promised–”

“Kakashi had… something to do,” Minato answered, shooting his son a placating smile. “But look, Sasuke’s here!”

Sasuke did not look happy to be there, fidgeting at Itachi’s side. Naruto gave him an extremely judgemental one-over. 

“We’re going to have tons of fun, Naruto-kun!” Tori said, putting on her most disarming smile and flashing a thumbs up. 

Naruto looked doubtful. Last time she’d been here, Tori had been very insistent on doing a jigsaw puzzle, because Tori was a nerd who liked puzzles and didn’t understand small children didn’t. Deidara wasn’t sure what the appeal of Hatake Kakashi as a babysitter was, but he definitely seemed cooler than Tori. 

Not cooler than Deidara, obviously. 

Kushina-sensei and Minato were going to go out to eat on a rare date night, and Kushina passed over a post-it note with the restaurant’s phone number. She said their plan afterwards was to take a “long, private walk” for several hours and that they could be reached via ANBU in case of a dire emergency. 

(Fuck. They were going to go off and fuck, possibly in the woods or some shit. Thanks for sharing, Kushina-sensei.) 

They received instructions for heating up dinner and Naruto’s bedtime, and then were left alone with the kids sitting around the dining table. 

“Do I really have to stay the entire night?” Sasuke demanded of Itachi as soon as the adults were gone. 

“Yeah, Mom says I have to give my bed to him,” Naruto agreed, crossing his arms in a stunning imitation of Kushina-sensei’s disapproval pose. “That’s just not fair.”

Sasuke stuck out his tongue, and Naruto wadded up his napkin and threw it at him. 

“Whoa there,” Tori protested, grabbing it out of the air. “That’s not a situationally appropriate way to express your feelings, Naruto.”

Had Tori… ever spoken to a child?

“Sasuke, we won’t be going home until after you’re asleep anyway,” Itachi said blandly. “Besides, you like Hokage-sama’s pancakes.”

Naruto brightened. “Dad said he’s making pancakes?”

Briefly distracted by the distant dream of pancakes that Itachi may or may not have just made up, the two boys calmed down enough for them to get dinner on the table. Then they immediately started bickering again. 

Deidara had no idea why Kushina-sensei insisted they were friends. Itachi also insisted this but Itachi was also, like, noticeably insane about all things Sasuke. Deidara just didn’t see the point of forcing playdates like this. 

“Okay, that’s it,” Deidra decided when Naruto flicked rice at Sasuke. “You lost seat privileges, yeah.”

“What–” Naruto started as Deidara picked him up by under his arms. “Hey!”

Deidara sat him back down at the other end of the table. Itachi wordlessly passed Naruto’s plate over. Sasuke looked like he desperately wanted to mock Naruto, but his eyes kept flicking back to Itachi. Apparently Sasuke could act slightly civilized with Itachi literally breathing down his back. 

Naruto got extremely pouty and refused to finish his whole meal, but they did get through dinner without a food fight. 

“I found a super fun game,” Tori announced while Itachi peeled and cut up pears for dessert. She set a box down on the table. “It’s a puzzle of the Elemental Nations, where each piece is a province! Is that fun?”

Both boys stared at her. Tori stared expectantly back at them, like she was waiting for them to burst into cheers any second. 

“Do you want to see what’s in my room?” Naruto offered. 

“Okay,” Sasuke agreed. 

Naruto grabbed the entire bowl of pears the second Itachi set it on the table and zipped off, Sasuke on his heels. Tori sunk into her chair, pulling the puzzlebox towards herself. 

“Well, I think it sounds fun,” she mumbled.  

There was the distinct sound of one of the boys slipping on the stairs, followed by the clang of the plastic bowl hitting the ground, and Itachi sighed and followed them. 

The next couple of hours Deidara would categorize as “not terrible, for a D-rank.” Deidara convinced the boys to abandon Itachi to clean up the pears, and Naruto very proudly showed off the little training target and plastic shuriken set he had in his room. The plastic shuriken couldn’t stick in anything, but they were weighted to mimic an actual shuriken, and the target mat hanging from the back of Naruto’s door  changed colors where pressure was applied, so you could see where you hit it. 

“Nii-san lets me use his real kunai,” Sasuke sniffed, even as he picked up a baby blue shuriken. 

“Well, he’s not supposed to,” Naruto countered. “Dad said.”

Deidara cut off the argument by picking up a pink shuriken and nailing the target in the center. 

They played with the shuriken for a while, and then Naruto unearthed a board game from the mess of his room. Both boys seemed very intent on beating each other, but Deidara got bored with it about three turns in, and Itachi showed back up with a washed bowl of cherries. Tori trailed in behind him with a deck of cards from the same pile of games she’d found the puzzle.

“I’ll teach you how to gamble,” she told the boys, and Itachi buried his face in his hands as both of them lit up.

Card games were fun for a few rounds, until it became clear that Tori didn’t didn’t know you were supposed to let little kids win every once in a while lest their little feelings get hurt. 

“Don’t show them your full hand until you’ve already won!” she proclaimed, pulling her pile of random game pieces they’d been betting with towards herself. 

“That means she’s cheating,” Deidara told the boys sagely. “You should throw her out, yeah.”

“I’m not cheating–” Tori protested. “Hey– hey!”

Watching Tori get wrestled out of the room by two eight year olds was, actually, one of the funniest things Deidara had ever seen. So, the night wasn’t so bad… right up until Itachi announced it was bedtime. 

“But we didn’t even finish our game,” Naruto protested, gesturing at the board game they’d abandoned. 

Sasuke’s eyes flicked between Itachi and Naruto. Sasuke had to be acutely aware of Itachi’s… personality. If Itachi decided you were going to do something, you were either going to do it, or you were going to have to unleash an S-ranked jutsu to make him back down. 

Sasuke might have been ready to defer to Itachi, but Naruto had a whole eight years of practice ignoring the Hokage himself. He puffed himself up and metaphorically dug his heels into the ground. And, to what looked like Itachi’s dawning horror, Sasuke decided he wasn’t going to let Naruto outdo him. 

“No,” Itachi said to Sasuke’s impressive puppy dog eyes, but Deidara could see him wavering. “No. Go brush your teeth.”

“RUN!” Naruto shrieked, and then the air was filled with glitter. 

“Oi,” Deidara protested, grabbing for him, but then immediately recoiled when his hand touched something slimy. 

Craft glue? Deidara wondered, barely registering Sasuke flipping the boardgame into Itachi’s face. Both boys run out of the room giggling. Is this why Kakashi was acting like that?

Kakashi had had to cut something strange out of his hair a couple months ago… 

“No, my puzzle!” Tori screeched from downstairs, so apparently she was useless. 

Itachi clicked his tongue in annoyance, and Deidara watched as he flash stepped over the stairs’ banister, rather than run down them like a normal person. Deidara followed him. 

Most little children usually couldn’t do their own jutsu or cunning plots to foil Uchiha Itachi. But most little children didn’t have full access to the Hokage’s house. 

“Later, loser!” Naruto yelled from what Deidara had thought to be a closet door in the living room, and then slammed it shut. There was a click and a flash of light to indicate a jutsu, and then absolute silence. 

Itachi stepped forward and tried the doorknob. It didn’t budge. 

“Oh, that’s…” Tori started. “Yeah, you’re not getting that open.”

It wasn’t a closet, apparently, but rather some sort of safe room. Whatever jutsu was on it not only prevented them from opening or kicking in the door, but it also completely soundproofed whatever was happening with Naruto and Sasuke on the inside. This was probably a good idea if the Hokage’s family had to hide during an emergency, but a terrible idea if your son was a little shit who hated bedtime. 

“If the Hokage and Kushina-sensei designed it, I doubt even you could blow it open,” Itachi said to Deidara. After a beat he added, “Not that you should try.”

“I’m sure they’ll get bored and come out, yeah,” Deidara replied. “I’m going to check out their movie collection.”

One movie later, during which Itachi paced around behind the couch and in front of the safe room door, it started to occur to Deidara that maybe they weren’t going to come out. Or, god forbid, they simply weren’t able to. 

“Tori,” Itachi whined. 

Tori made a big show of laboriously standing from the couch, but Deidara could tell she loved every second of it. 

“Let’s see what’s going on with this seal,” she said, and then slapped her hand against the door. She did it with more drama and flourish than she did most things, which was just how she did anything involving channeling her own chakra. It was sort of pathetic, in Deidara’s opinion, because nothing Tori could do with her own chakra as of now was nearly as impressive as the type of shit she did without it. 

This technique was one Deidara had witnessed Kushina-sensei teach her, and it was one of a number of super basic fuinjutsu skills Tori had somehow skipped. It was one of the few fuinjutsu “lessons” Tori had received where she didn’t get an internal-screaming looking in her eyes as Kushina-sensei explained something that Tori clearly already understood. The technique forced collapsed seals to unfold themselves. 

(“Have you just been working blind?” Kushina asked, aghast. 

“Sometimes?” Tori replied. “You don’t always need… well, I can unfold them with another seal–”

“Tori, that’s the hardest way to do it–”)

The seal appeared beneath Tori’s fingers, spidering out across the door and then onto the walls and even across the floor and ceiling. Tori took a step back, eyes darting around to study the seal as it grew. Deidara was no fuinjutsu expert, but this had way more parts than any of the barrier seals he’d seen Tori make before. 

“Jesus Christ,” Tori breathed out. She hadn’t accidentally sworn by her family’s god since the whole reincarnation thing, which meant whatever they were looking at was really, really bad. 

“Well,” Tori said after a beat. “It’s good for children to learn that their actions have consequences.”

“Tori,” Itachi hissed back at her. 

“What? They’ll be fine in there. It’ll only be, what? Three more hours, max?”

Itachi glared at the wall. 

“We could contact Kushina-sensei,” he said finally. 

“What, and ruin their date night?” Deidara countered. “I’m with Tori. Kushina-sensei would never let us live it down, and the kids will be fine, yeah.”

Itachi glared at the wall some more. He twitched. 

“Could you at least take down the soundproofing?” he asked finally. “What if they’re scared?”

Deidara groaned. What if they need a little snack? What if they have to pee? Who cares!

“Actually,” Tori said brightly, eyes still studying the seal, “it’s really well-integrated, so it’d be easier to undo the whole thing–”

Itachi twitched again. 

“You need to calm down, yeah,” Deidara told him. Tori wrinkled her nose at him. “If you get started about ‘microaggressions,’ again, Tori–”

Itachi did not calm down. Eventually, he summoned a crow to contact Hokage-sama, as if he didn’t care how hellish it was going to be to have to deal with Kushina-sensei after they box-blocked her. 

Also, like, rude? Even old people deserved to get some sometimes. 

“Okay, okay, fine,” Tori said, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Itachi, can you use your Sharingan to confirm whose chakra is powering this thing?”

The crow stayed on Itachi’s shoulder as he studied the seal. 

“It’s a mix,” he said eventually. “Mostly Hokage-sama, with Kushina-sensei, and… ah, I guess the third one is Jiraiya-sama.”

“Okay, thanks,” Tori told him. “I think deactivating it is chakra-specific, so only those three people can do it. If you can find something in the house with some of their chakra, I might be able to trick it.”

Itachi nodded solemnly and then walked off, crow still on his shoulder. Tori continued to stare at the seal, biting her thumbnail in thought.

When Itachi was gone, Deidara asked, “What sort of object do you think he’ll find?”

“Oh, I just wanted him to go away,” Tori replied, leaning against the back of the couch. “If Itachi finds anything, I’ll tell him it’s not enough.”

Deidara stared at her. Normally, he’d be very pro manipulating Itachi. But…

“So you can deactivate,” he concluded. “Why not just do it?”

Tori took her time to answer, and Deidara heard Itachi open a squeaky drawer in the kitchen. 

“I don’t think I should be parading around the fact that I can just undo the Hokage’s personal seals,” Tori said finally. 

“So what?” Deidara countered. “You work for him. He’ll be delighted, yeah.”

Tori bit her lower lip. Don’t show them your full hand until you’ve already won, she’d said. She sat through so many lessons where she pretended she had no idea what Kushina-sensei was talking about. 

Deidara reached over and shoved her. 

“Hey,” Tori protested. 

“You’re being so stupid, yeah,” Deidara told her. “They knew since day one I could blow up the whole village if I really wanted to. That’s why they recruited me, yeah. You’re supposed to let your village know how good you are.”

Tori gave him a look like she thought he was the one being a little stupid. 

“It’s different for me,” Tori said finally. “I’m not– you and Itachi, you could fight your way out of anything. I have to play smarter than that.”

“Play?” Deidara repeated. “What game do you think you’re playing? Hokage-sama and Kushina-sensei aren’t Orochimaru. They’re not going to cut out your spleen because they get bored. There’s no ‘game,’ yeah.”

“They let me play with their kid,” Tori protested. “Their trust���”

“What the fuck, Tori,” Deidara countered. “They let Itachi play with their kid. They already trust us. They’ll trust you more if they know you’re not going to burn your eyebrows off making stupid fuinjutsu mistakes.”

Tori turned her face back to the seal. “Hmm.”

“Whatever,” Deidara told her, flopping down onto the couch. “If you want to be a moron and let Kushina-sensei keep wringing her hands and giving you fuinjutsu tips you don’t need instead of actually being useful to you, I don’t care.”

Eventually, Itachi came back with chakra-infused ink. He’d also grabbed some brushes. 

“Actually, I think disarming it completely would be a security risk,” Tori told him, looking him dead in the eyes. The crow ruffled its wings. “But I’ll get rid of the soundproofing, if you want.”

It took her two tries and over an hour of work, but Tori didn’t blow anything up or set off the additional alarms in the seal. 

“Naruto-kun is so annoying,” Sasuke reported through the door, completely unafraid and unharmed. “And so stupid! He’s been trying to open it but he doesn’t remember how.”

The safe room had both food and water, along with little cots, and they managed to convince the boys to go to sleep before Minato and Kushina got home. 

“Oh crap,” Kushina said when she saw the seal. “Guys, I’m so sorry, he’s done this to Kakashi twice–”

“And you didn’t warn us?” Itachi cut her off, eyebrow twitching. He’d dismissed the crow, at least. “Or adequately teach your son how to undo it?”

Kushina-sensei blinked down at him. “Well, I mean– he’s a kid. We figured he’s not experienced enough to make the call about when it’s safe enough to come out.”

Itachi opened his mouth again, probably to explain to Kushina he thought she and her husband were idiots, but Tori stomped on his foot. He closed his mouth. 

Minato had approached the door, likely with the intent of undoing his deathtrap, but had become distracted by the additional seals Tori had painted onto the wall directly to the right of the door. 

“Oh, sorry about that,” Tori said, foot still in range of kicking Itachi. “Itachi was worried when we couldn’t communicate with them, so I tweaked the soundproofing a little.”

Minato tapped a finger to his chin, looking thoughtful. “I see.”

“Hmm, I guess if Naruto’s going to activate it in non-emergencies we do need to give him a way out,” Kushina-sensei continued to babble, stretching as she stepped around her husband to check out Tori’s work. “Yikes, Tori, why didn’t you just undo the whole thing? Would’ve been way easier.”

Tori was watching them very intently, still standing closer to Itachi than she strictly needed to be. She’d also put Deidara between herself and the seal, he noticed. 

Paranoid bitch, he thought. 

“She said it’d be a security risk,” Deidara answered for her, moving so he was no longer between them. Tori glared at him. “Like you might need to use the room again in the next couple of hours or something, yeah.”

He yawned performatively. 

“Did you hijack the chakra in the seal?” Minato asked, sounding baffled. 

“Yeah, babe, what else would she do? You know she likes medical stuff, and that’s all they do–”

In the end, Tori learned she could have made her seal with about thirty fewer strokes, Sasuke woke up and demanded he be taken home, and Deidara barely dodged a newly escaped Naruto throwing tinned natto in his hair. 

“Brat!” Kushina-sensei bellowed. “You know it’s past your bedtime–!”

On their walk back to the genin dorms, Tori seemed oddly pleased with herself. It wasn’t the way she’d normally express pride; there was no wild gesticulating or her attempting to explain every detail of her latest feat. Instead, she kept her eyes on the sidewalk and a tiny little smile on her face. 

“What’s up with you?” Deidara demanded after a few blocks. 

“Oh, um,” Tori fidgeted. “That went better than I thought, I guess.”

That was actually really fucking sad. Had Tori always been like this?

Deidara reached over and shoved her off course. “I told you, yeah.”