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#honestly i needed this thank you for the ask
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Was Any Of It True?
Pairing: badboy!Azriel x goodgirl!Reader
Summary: Modern/College AU! Az’s on-again-off-again girlfriend gives Azriel a proposition: make the new bookworm fall in love with him, then break her heart, in exchange for anything he wants. He agrees, but things get complicated when he falls for Reader for real.
Based on this request! 🩷
Warnings: angst, sexual language?, swearing, Azriel & friends being assholes
Word Count: 10.2k   oh lord sorry besties I couldn’t shut my little brain off
“I'm telling you, Az, she's pissing me off. The professor loves her, and I saw that she got a 100 on the exam,” Claire was seething while she and Azriel lounged in his apartment, eating the pizza he'd ordered.
“Mhmm,” he mumbled around his pizza, only half listening. Claire was always complaining about something. “And what did you get?”
“98! He took two points off because I didn't answer thoroughly enough,” she scoffed. “God, I hate her. She's going to push me right off the top of the Dean's list.”
Azriel blinked. “I mean, you'll still be very near the top of the list.”
Claire groaned, throwing her napkin onto her paper plate angrily, “That's not good enough!”
He rolled his eyes and she glared at him. “Don't be an ass! This is a big deal to me.”
“Oh, I know it is. This girl is all you talk about.”
“Because I hate her. Maybe if she got laid, she’d be distracted enough to slip up once in a while,” she grumbled.
“Yeah, maybe,” Azriel said, pulling his laptop out of his backpack and setting it on the table, a sufficient signal that he didn’t want to talk about his girlfriend’s arch nemesis anymore. 
No more than a week later, Azriel’s on-again-off-again girlfriend was off-again, and honestly, he was relieved. Claire’s obsession with being at the top of the academic food chain was bordering on insanity, and he was glad he didn’t have to hear about it anymore.
He was currently at a house party that Cassian had dragged him to, with a blonde girl that he couldn’t remember the name of sitting in his lap, one of her arms draped behind his neck, the other resting on his chest. She had been whispering in his ear all the things that she wanted to do to him, before Cassian interrupted, handing Azriel a shot with a grin. 
Blondie scowled at Cassian, who just smirked back as the girl that Cass had been talking to earlier sidled up next to him, wrapping her arms around his middle. 
Azriel knocked the shot back and handed the cup it had come in to the blonde girl. “Can you get me another one?”
She seemed annoyed, but took the cup from him anyway, striding into the kitchen. 
“Sorry for interrupting,” Cassian said, settling on the couch next to him, before pulling the girl onto his lap.
Azriel rolled his eyes. “Like I give a shit.”
Cassian snickered as the blonde girl came back, draping herself in his lap again, handing him another shot. He drank it, just as Claire appeared before him, her arms crossed over her chest, and her brow furrowed.
“What do you want?” he asked, his voice husky.
“I have a proposition for you.”
He smirked, making a show of tightening his grip on the blonde girl’s waist. “No, thanks. Been there, done that.”
“Not that kind of proposition, you idiot. Can we talk privately? I think it’ll be worth your while,” she said, her lips turning up into a sultry smile.
“I don’t know, Claire, I’m pretty busy right now,” he said, turning his gaze to the blonde girl, squeezing her thigh. She sighed dreamily, leaning further into him.
Claire groaned. “Look, Az, I really need your help. Please?” 
Azriel studied Claire, and he could see that it was true. She was wearing her most annoyed, don’t-fuck-with-me face, but her eyes were pleading. Sad.
He sighed, glancing apologetically at the girl in his lap before turning back to Claire. “Fine, we can talk.”
She led him into someone’s empty bedroom and shut the door behind her. 
“If this is about that girl you’re obsessed with, so help me,” he said. She winced, and he threw his head back. “Unbelievable. Claire, I don’t want to hear about this anymore! I don’t care about your problems.”
“Just hear me out!”
He crossed his arms over his chest, and raised an eyebrow at her, waiting.
“She actually is threatening my spot on the Dean’s list now,” she said, looking close to tears.
He looked pointedly at her. “And?”
“And I was thinking about what I said earlier… about how if a really hot guy was interested in her, maybe she would stop caring about her grades so much,” she said, smiling at him now.
“And?” Azriel just wished she would get to the point.
Claire sighed, exasperated. “I need you to seduce her.”
Azriel barked out a laugh, leaning his shoulder against the nearest wall. “You’re kidding, right? Why would I do that?”
She stepped closer to him, trailing a finger along his chest, her touch feather-light through his black t-shirt. She looked up at him from beneath her lashes, “Because I asked? Because I’ll give you anything you want,” she said, her voice dropping seductively.
He held her gaze, leaning down until their mouths were a breath away. Azriel heard her breath hitch.
Then he pulled away rapidly, and she blinked. “Sweetheart, you know I can fuck you anytime I want, right? That is not going to persuade me to help you.”
Her brow furrowed, her nose scrunching up. Oh, she was furious. Azriel's mouth turned up into his calculated half smile.
“What do you want, Az?” she huffed.
“Hmm,” he said, taking his time to think. Claire scowled. “I haven’t decided yet. But when I need to call in a favor of my own, you have to promise to do it. No matter what,” he drawled.
To her credit, she really looked like she was thinking it through, trying to think of another way to push this girl off the list. But finally, she sighed. “Deal.”
He pushed off the wall, walking towards the door. “Alright, so I just have to seduce the bookworm? Easy.”
Claire shook her head, her eyes still alight with her anger. “No, if I’m going to agree to any favor you could possibly want, you’re going to have to go further. You need to make her fall in love with you.”
Azriel bristled a bit, leaning against the door now. “I know I’m an asshole, but that seems too far, don’t you think?”
“No. If she’s going to be distracted enough that her grades will slip, you need to make it seem real,” she said, and then smiled as if she had a wicked thought.
“What?” Azriel asked.
“And then you break her heart, right before exams,” she said excitedly, her eyes burning with enthusiasm now. “You tell her, in front of everyone, that it was all fake.”
He rubbed at his bicep, a nervous tic that Claire picked up on immediately. “Jesus, Claire. I don’t want to ruin this girl’s life.”
She arched her brow. “Why not? She’s ruining mine.”
Azriel rolled his eyes and Claire pounced, “Any favor, Az. Any time, you can tell me to do whatever you want,” she smirked. 
He groaned, pinching his nose. “Fine,” he ground out. “Where do I find her?”
Claire beamed. “Where else would a nerd be? The library, of course.”
---
You shifted in your seat, starting to feel sore after poring over your notes for hours. Maybe you should go for a walk. Maybe. But, you still had so much to do…
Groaning, you crossed your arms on the table, laying your head down on top of them. Just a minute, you just needed a tiny break --
“Studying always makes me feel like that, too,” said a low, male voice. 
You lifted your head, bewildered, and nearly choked on your own spit. The guy who was for some reason deigning to talk to you was… well, what other way was there to say it? He was drop-dead gorgeous. 
His face was stoic as he sauntered up to your table, his jet black hair was just a tad unruly, his hazel eyes burning into yours. But it was his body that made the breath completely escape your lungs. He was dressed in all black, his t-shirt hugging his chest and his biceps, showing off his every muscle, and there were swirling black tattoos peeking out from under his sleeves. 
All you could do was stare as he took the seat across from you, leaning back with his arms crossed like the two of you did this every day.
“What class is that for?” he asked, nodding to the textbook open in front of you, the dozens of papers scattered around you.
“Organic Chemistry,” you said, trying to sound like you were normal and not completely surprised by this handsome stranger finding you in your favorite quiet corner of the library.
He let out a low whistle, “Damn, you are smart.”
“What, did someone tell you I was?” you asked. 
“No, I just figured when I saw all the --” he gestured to your cluttered workspace, “homework stuff.”
You arched an eyebrow. “Homework stuff?”
His mouth turned up the slightest bit, holding up his hands like he was surrendering. “You caught me. I’m not much of an academic.”
“Then what are you doing here?” you asked curiously.
“Now, that is an excellent question,” he said, and really did seem like he was questioning it. “Girls? Parties? Though I could get girls anywhere and I don't particularly enjoy parties.”
You nodded. “Ah,” you said. “Got it.”
He braced his arms on the table, leaning forward. “I take it you’re not into that kinda thing?”
A dry laugh escaped from your throat, “Definitely not. I’m really only here for the--” you mimicked his gesture from earlier, “homework stuff.”
He barked out a laugh, his stoic face completely transforming for the briefest of moments. You couldn’t help but stare. “You’re telling me all you do is study? A beautiful girl like you? Please tell me you’ve been to at least one party,” he said, looking at you incredulously. 
You blushed. “No, I haven’t been to any.”
You braced yourself for impact, for the teasing or insults to come, but he just smiled softly. “You wanna go to one with me tonight?”
Your eyebrows knit together in confusion. “You don’t even know my name.”
The side of his mouth quirked up into a smile, his eyes dancing with amusement. “What's your name?”
Rolling your eyes, you told him.
“Nice to meet you. I'm Azriel.” He raised his eyebrows, “So? Party?”
“I thought you just said you don't like parties!”
“True, but I do love the thought of corrupting a sweet, innocent bookworm,” he smirked.
“No, thanks.” You couldn't imagine yourself going to a house party, especially not with a stranger.
Azriel's cool-guy demeanor seemed to drop the slightest bit. “Why not?”
You looked at him pointedly. “I don't know you. And I have no interest in being corrupted. Why do you want me to come to this party so badly anyway?”
He shrugged casually. “I like you.”
“You don't know me!”
“See, that, right there,” he snapped his fingers and pointed at you. “You're funny. Smart, beautiful. What's not to like?”
You forced yourself to hold his gaze, even as a blush rose to your cheeks. “I'm not going to a party with someone I don't know. They make true crime documentaries about that sort of thing.”
He seemed to contemplate that for a moment. “Okay, you make a fair point. What do you want to do then?”
“What do you mean?”
“You can pick our first date, since you didn't like my idea.”
“What date?” You blanched.
He arched an eyebrow. “Our first date? Weren't you listening?”
You studied him for a moment. For the life of you, you could not figure out what this guy's angle was. 
As if reading your mind, he said softly, “Look, I just saw you and thought you were really pretty, and that it looked like you could use a break from studying. That's it,” he held his hands up again. “I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. If you want me to go, I'll go.”
For a beat longer, you watched him, his body language, his ridiculously pretty face. What was the harm, really? You sighed, tore off a scrap of paper from your notebook, scribbled out your number, then handed it to him. “I need to study. If you text me later, I'll let you know where we're going on the first date.” 
His face broke out into what might have been the first genuine smile you'd seen from him. He took the paper from you, his fingers brushing against yours.
“Can't wait.”
You were half expecting to never hear from Azriel again. But just a few hours later, as you were eating dinner in your apartment, your phone chimed with a text. 
Az: Done studying yet?
It was an effort to bite down your smile. 
You: Taking a break for dinner. 
It was less than a minute before he responded. 
Az: Dinner? Is that what our first date is going to be?
You didn’t try to hide your smile this time.
You: A little cliche, don’t you think?
Az: Oh, absolutely. So… what are we doing?
You: Meet at the tennis courts at 7 tomorrow?
Az: We’re playing tennis?
You: No, but I’m not giving you my address. And I’m not giving away the surprise.
Az: So smart. So mysterious. I’m swooning.
You: Shut up.
Az: See you tomorrow ;)
You tossed your phone to the side, forcing yourself to focus back on your schoolwork.
The following day you parked your car by the empty tennis courts on campus just before 7. It was early spring; the weather finally started to warm up enough to not be too chilly in the evening. Still, you rubbed your arms nervously. You were starting to regret this. You didn’t know this guy at all. What if it went horribly wrong?
Before you could contemplate bailing, a familiar figure rode up on a jet black motorcycle. Of course this guy had a motorcycle. You couldn't see his face underneath the helmet, but you would already recognize those tattooed arms anywhere. 
He parked his bike, smoothly sliding off it and taking his helmet off before sauntering over to you. “Hey, beautiful.” 
You rolled your eyes, sure that he had said that to a million girls on a million dates before.
“What? Don’t do that,” he said softly, his smile softening and his gaze raking down your body. “You are beautiful.”
“Thank you,” you said quietly, giving in. 
“So,” he said, towering over you. “What’s the plan?”
You smiled. “How’s your mini golf game?”
He raised an eyebrow, looking a little skeptical. “Mini golf? That’s what you’re choosing?”
“Yes, it is. Do you have something to say about that?” you teased. 
His eyes sparked at the tone in your voice. “Nope. Nothing at all.” He nodded to his motorcycle. “You wanna hop on the bike?”
You looked pointedly at him and he laughed. “Didn’t think so,” he gestured to your car. “Lead the way.”
Your nerves started to dim as the two of you fell into a rhythm going through the course. The two of you were just talking and laughing like it was normal. It was… fun, actually.
“Shit,” Azriel muttered as he overshot the hole. Again.
You laughed and his eyes flicked over to you, lingering a bit. “You’re good at this, bookworm,” he said as he took another shot, sinking it into the hole this time. You watched, leaning against your putter, having finished that hole two shots ago. 
Shrugging, you said, “I used to go with my family a lot.”
He placed his hand on the small of your back as you walked to the next hole. You cleared your throat, focusing on your steps, on your breathing, on anything but how it felt to have him touch you so casually. “What about you?”
“What about me?” he asked as you dropped your ball onto the green. 
You took your shot before you answered. The ball landed just shy of the hole. “What’s your family like?”
“My family…” he trailed off, clearing his throat, setting up his shot. He paused to look at you for a moment before he swung. “It’s complicated.”
He hit the ball and it stopped right next to yours. 
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pry,” you said, as the two of you walked further down the hole.
“No, you didn’t. It’s just… I don’t really talk about them with anybody.”
You nodded, not sure where to go from here.
Azriel smiled reassuringly, nudging you lightly with his shoulder. “Stop worrying.”
“I’m not worrying,” you claimed, your voice an octave too high. 
“You are. I can tell.”
You bit your lip to hide your smile as you sunk your ball into the hole.
“I think I’m going to need some pointers from you on the next hole,” he grumbled. 
“I guess I could help you out,” you laughed. 
So, when you got to the next hole, the last hole, he stepped so close that your bodies were nearly touching. You tried to control your breathing. 
“You’re gonna help me out?” he murmured, his eyes flashing down to your lips for a moment. 
“Okay,” you breathed. 
He stepped behind you, his body pressed against your back, wrapping his arms around you, his hands covering yours on the club. 
“How is this going to help you, exactly?” you asked, your voice slightly unsteady. 
His lips brushed your ear as he said, “Oh, trust me, it’s helping.”
You couldn’t say anything. Could hardly breathe.
“What do you think I’m doing wrong?” He murmured. 
You swallowed. “You’re hitting it too hard. Not exactly rocket science.”
“Mmm. That makes sense. I do tend to go… hard.”
That finally had you coming to your senses. You stepped out of his grasp, turning back to glare at him when you were a safe distance away. 
The side of his mouth turned up into a smile. “Sorry. I couldn't help myself.”
You resisted the urge to roll your eyes at him again. “Just take your shot.”
He smirked at you for a moment, before he swung, and the ball went right into the hole. 
He turned to you, his eyes wide. You laughed and he hugged you, picking you up and spinning you around. 
You let out an involuntary squeal of surprise, and he laughed, gazing into your eyes as he set you back on the ground. “Thanks for the help.”
“I think you’ve been playing me this whole time,” you joked. 
His smile fell a little, his eyes sobering. 
“What’s wrong?” you asked. When he just stared at you, his expression unreadable, you added, “Azriel, I was joking.”
He blinked and then his natural, stoic expression was back as he took a step closer to you. “Right. I think you’re just a good teacher.”
You just looked at him, trying to decipher the changes in his mood, who he really was underneath the gruff exterior.
He smiled faintly, stepping even closer. “What are you thinking about?”
You had to crane your neck to look him in the eye now. “I'm trying to figure out what you're thinking about.”
Azriel's smile turned into a smirk. “I'm thinking… that I really want to kiss you. But I don't want to scare you away.”
Heat flooded your face and his smile turned softer as he cupped your cheek gently with a rough hand. “Would it scare you away?” He murmured.
“I -- don't know,” you said honestly.
His hazel eyes dipped to your lips and stayed there. “I think I'm gonna have to take the risk,” he said, his voice low, husky.
“I think so, too,” you breathed.
His free hand slinked around your waist, gently pulling your body into his. Your heart thundered in your chest as he leaned down, slowly bringing his lips to yours. He seemed to give you a moment to process, and you felt him smile against your mouth when you started to kiss him back, your fingers curling around his bicep, his shoulder.
You were breathless by the time he pulled away, and as the two of you drove back to the tennis courts, you couldn't help but hope that it would happen again by the end of the night.
When you parked your car near his motorcycle in the abandoned lot, he lingered, his gaze holding yours, dropping to your mouth again.
He shot you a crooked smile. “Aren't you gonna walk me to my bike?”
Rolling your eyes playfully, you got out of the car, walking over to the motorcycle and settling against the fence near it, crossing your arms over your chest. “Happy now?” You asked.
Slowly, he sauntered over to you, his eyes twinkling under the stars. He raised his arm, twining his fingers in the chain link fence above your head, leaning his body towards you, but not quite touching. He gazed down at you, still sporting that half smile. “Very happy,” he murmured.
Your breath hitched and when his smile widened, you knew he heard it. 
He held your gaze as he leaned down, bringing his mouth to yours again. You let yourself fall deeper into the kiss this time, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him into you. 
When he finally pulled away, he was grinning. “Want to go for a ride before you head home?” He said, nodding to his motorcycle.
You had stepped far enough out of your comfort zone for today. “Maybe next time.”
He raised his eyebrows in amusement. “So you're giving me a next time?”
Damn. You blushed. “I said maybe.”
“Uh huh, sure,” he said, leaning in again so his lips were barely an inch from yours. “You can't wait to see me again,” he whispered.
You shoved him away lightly and he chuckled, backing up towards his bike, but keeping his eyes on you. “Until next time, then. Have a good night, bookworm.” He winked before putting his helmet on and speeding away.
A few weeks, a few dates, and several kisses later, you couldn't deny that Azriel was on your mind quite a bit.
You had never thought that someone like him would be interested in someone like you, but he seemed to prove time and time again that he did indeed like you. He texted you flirty little things every day, making you blush in class. He asked about your day, and seemed to genuinely be listening, and he would do pretty much anything you wanted on your dates. Last week, the two of you had gone to a local bookstore and he had watched you browse, a small smile on his face. He ended up picking out a book he wanted you to read and you did the same for him. He had been sending you daily updates on his progress through the book. Slowly, you were starting to let your walls down, despite yourself.
So, when he asked you to finally go to a party with him, to meet his friends, you accepted. You still felt cautious: partying had never been something that you were remotely interested in, but you trusted him.
---
Azriel knew he had to tread this next part carefully. Things had been going well with you. He let you take control of your time together so you would be comfortable, and honestly, he was actually having a really good time getting to know you and seeing where you would take him next.
And when you kissed him… God. It was always a struggle to keep his hands on your waist, to stay PG. He wished he could explore things further with you in that regard, but he wouldn't let himself go there. Not when your broken heart was the finish line.
He rarely let himself think about it -- the deal that he had made with Claire. Being with you felt so natural that he usually forgot he was supposed to be acting. That he was supposed to be leading you to Claire’s revenge.
He had convinced you to come to a party, upon Claire's request so she could see the progress he had made with you. You had said yes, he assumed because you trusted him enough now. The thought made his stomach roll. He was really starting to hate himself for getting mixed up in this.
Azriel acted differently around you than he did around the rest of the general population. At a young age he had learned to keep quiet, to not show a single emotion on his pretty face, to be tough, or be punished. 
With you… he couldn't help but smile. Couldn't stop the laughs that he usually stomped down for the rest of the world.
So, having his two worlds collide at this party…he didn't know exactly how to navigate it. Deep down, it made his heart swell that you trusted him enough to help you navigate something so far out of your comfort zone. But if his friends saw the way he acted around you, he would never hear the end of it.
This would be a mess.
If Azriel wasn't leaning against his motorcycle when you exited your apartment building, he may have fallen over. You were wearing skintight jeans and a black tank top that showed more cleavage than he ever imagined he'd see from you. His fingers flexed on his biceps. He wanted to pull you back into your apartment and spend an hour peeling those clothes away inch by inch.
He blinked the lust away, trying to maintain his stoic expression, but failed, as he always did with you. He smiled at you and you smiled back. 
He could tell by the way you carried yourself as you neared him that you were nervous. “Hey, beautiful,” he drawled his usual greeting as you wrapped your arms around his waist in your usual greeting.
“Hi,” you said, a little sheepishly. His eyes must have lingered on your curves a little too long because your eyes widened a bit, and you bit your lip nervously as you pulled away from him. He nearly groaned. “Is it too much? Do I look stupid?”
Azriel placed his hands on your shoulders gently, dipping his head to look you in the eyes. “You look amazing. Seriously.”
You blushed and murmured, “Thank you.”
He had to turn away, to grab your helmet, so you wouldn't see how much you affected him. He fucking loved it when he made you blush like that. 
Azriel turned back to you, holding up the helmet, his eyebrows raising with amusement. “You ready to join the dark side, bookworm?”
You sighed, shifting on your feet. 
“It'll be okay,” he said softly. “I got you.”
You nodded, seeming to resolve yourself, and reached for the helmet with slightly shaking hands.
He helped you make sure it was on correctly, his fingers brushing your chin, your neck. He bit back a smile as you shivered.
Azriel held your hand as you got settled on the back of the bike, showing you where to put your feet, and how to shift your weight with him.
When you seemed at least somewhat comfortable, he slid his helmet on, smoothly setting onto the motorcycle. You wrapped your arms around his middle, pressing your chest into his back. You were already holding him like your life depended on it, and he beamed freely underneath the helmet.
“Hold on tight,” he shot back at you, before he revved the engine, taking off much more gently than he normally would.
He tried not to think about the feel of you pressed into him, how tightly you were holding on. It didn't work. He wanted to drive you everywhere.
He couldn't resist reaching back to briefly squeeze your thigh at a red light. “How are you doing?”
“Good,” you said. He couldn't be sure, but he thought he heard a smile in your voice.
Too soon in Azriel's opinion, they had made it to the party. He parked, offering you his hand to help you get down.
When he pulled the helmet off your head, he was pleased to see that you were indeed smiling.
“Have fun?” He smirked.
“I did, actually,” you said, sounding a little breathless. 
“Whenever you need a ride, you just let me know,” he winked.
You laughed, glancing behind him at the house. 
He took your hand in his, squeezing reassuringly. You seemed to relax a bit. “We can leave whenever you want, okay?”
Taking a deep breath, you nodded and smiled nervously up at him.
You were doing this for him, he realized. Because he had asked you to. His heart constricted, guilt churning in his gut again as he led you inside, your hand squeezing his tightly. 
His shoulders tightened as he led you through the crowd, making sure you were tucked in close to him. 
“You want a drink?” he asked, as you made your way to the kitchen.
“Sure,” you said.
He rifled through what was on the sticky counter, trying to find something not disgusting for you to drink, making sure you stayed close to him. 
Finally handing you a cup, he put your hand on the small of your back, guiding you to a corner of the living room that wasn’t yet very crowded. He took a seat on the couch and you settled in next to him, tucked closely into his side. 
You smiled, leaning your shoulder into his. “Is this really it?” You asked skeptically. “You just sit here and drink around a bunch of drunk idiots?”
He laughed before he could stop himself. “I mean, yeah, that’s pretty much it,” he said, dipping his head to say in your ear. “Or we could dance. Or make out,” he smiled against your ear. 
You blushed and he laughed again, kissing your temple. 
Azriel wrapped an arm around your shoulders as Cassian and Rhys showed up, grinning at you, their eyebrows raised. Azriel fought the urge to roll his eyes. They had seen him laughing with you, kissing you, he knew. He had nearly forgotten where he was, why he was here with you. He loved them, but he wasn’t sure what they would say to you about him. They didn’t know about his arrangement with Claire, and he had been keeping details about his relationship with you as vague as possible.
“So you’re the one Az has been spending all his time with,” Cassian grinned. 
You smiled sheepishly, leaning further into Azriel. “I guess.”
Azriel nodded to his friends. “This is Cassian and Rhysand. They’ve been my best friends since we were kids.”
He could tell you were intrigued by that. He still hadn’t told you anything about his childhood. 
Before you could ask any questions, Claire showed up next to Azriel’s friends, her expression the very picture of friendship. It unsettled him so much that he held you closer to him, so you were practically on his lap. 
“Hi Claire,” you smiled, and his heart sank. You really had no idea how Claire felt about you. 
Claire smiled back. “Hey. I never expected to see you here.”
“I’m trying new things,” you said, smiling lightly at Azriel.
He couldn’t take it, having you so close to Claire, seeing that trust you had in him when you looked at him. He cleared his throat, standing up and offering you his hand. You took it, smiling politely at Claire and his friends as he led you through the house, out to the backyard. 
“Is everything okay?” You asked, looking up at him curiously as he leaned his back against the side of the house.
“Yeah,” he said, unable to stop the smile that rose to his face as you gazed at him with your big doe eyes. He tugged you closer, wrapping his arms around your waist. “I just wanted you to myself for a minute.”
“Oh yeah?” you flushed, and before he could stop himself, he kissed your cheeks, feeling the heat against his lips before his lips met yours in a slow, sensual kiss.
He was still kissing you when he heard Cassian snickering close by. “Oh shit, he’s whipped.”
Azriel rolled his eyes as he pulled away from you, but kept his hold on your waist. “How am I whipped?”
Cassian’s eyes gleamed with mischief and Azriel’s heart started to pound. “Sneaking out here on your own. You’re usually content to stay on the couch to make out with your girl of the week.”
Your body tensed in his arms and Azriel groaned internally, glaring at Cassian, who smirked. “Oh, she didn’t know? My bad, Az.”
Azriel’s expression was enough to send Cassian back inside. 
Your brow furrowed as you stepped back, out of his reach. “Girl of the week?”
He winced. “He’s being dramatic.”
You raised your eyebrows, glaring at him, crossing your arms over your chest. 
It was kind of adorable, but Azriel reigned in that comment. He held up his hands in surrender. “Okay, look. I told you when we met that I go to parties and meet girls there. But things are different now,” he said, taking a step closer to you. And it was true. Things were different. You had been the one haunting his thoughts since that first date. He had barely looked at anyone else since.
After a moment, you sighed, and he knew you wouldn’t resist when he wrapped his arms back around you. 
“Cassian’s an idiot,” he murmured, his focus back on your lips that he was dying to kiss again.
“So I’m not the girl of the week?” you said quietly, your eyes on his lips now. 
He smiled. “We’ve been seeing each other for several weeks, haven’t we?”
You nodded, biting your lip, before you stood up on your tiptoes to press a quick kiss to his lips. Azriel was surprised by his own relief. “Are we going back inside?” you asked. 
“Not if you don’t want to,” he said, wrapping his arms around your waist again. 
Pursing your lips in thought, you said, “Mmm. Let’s go back in.”
“Yeah?” he said, surprised.
You smiled up at him, resting your chin on his chest. His heart melted. “I’m trying to be brave.”
He kissed your forehead, smiling faintly. “I’m proud of you, bookworm.”
You beamed, your whole face lighting up. 
Azriel led you inside, his hand on the small of your back, trying to manage the swell of emotions in his chest. He didn’t have the time to process them right now. 
The two of you mingled throughout the party for a few hours, and you even went so far as to dance with him for a bit, your body pressed against his, your hips swaying to the beat of the pounding music. He could hardly believe it, the way you let loose with him.
He stopped in the bathroom before the two of you left. He wasn’t gone for more than a few minutes, but when he returned, he spotted you near the kitchen, backing away from a guy who was clearly very drunk and very horny. Azriel saw red. 
Before he could take a second to think, Azriel was upon the bastard, punching him in the jaw. 
He heard you yelp. The asshole staggered back, swearing, his hand cradling his jaw. Azriel barely spared him a glance, his hands gently holding either side of your face, his gaze raking your body, searching for any sign that he had touched you. 
Your eyes were wide, your breathing labored, but you seemed physically fine. “Are you okay?” he asked. 
You nodded, your eyes still frantic. 
He wrapped his arm around your shoulders as he led you outside. Claire caught his eye on the way out, hers shining with delight. He scowled at her. 
When you made it outside, he hugged you to his chest. “I’m sorry.”
“For what?” 
“I shouldn’t have left you alone.”
You snorted. “You were gone for a few minutes. It’s not your fault that men are gross.”
“Are you okay, really?” He asked, pulling back to look you in the eye.
“I’m okay,” you said quietly. 
He held you close to him, gazing at you for another moment before you smiled faintly. “You really didn’t need to punch him, you know.”
He winced slightly, remembering the yelp you let out when he threw that punch. “Sorry.”
“Don’t be,” you said, rising on your tiptoes to kiss him. 
Azriel held you until his heart rate slowed down, until his body was convinced that you were okay.
Later, after he had dropped you off at your apartment, Azriel stayed awake, tossing and turning, so many images from that night racing through his mind.
The way his heart constricted every time you smiled at him, the horror he felt at seeing Claire play nice, the terror and rage that flowed through his entire body when he saw that creep bothering you…
Azriel knew then, that he had real feelings for you. Shit.
---
“C’mon, baby, you’ve been studying for ages already,” Azriel murmured, standing behind you as you sat at your desk in your apartment, his arms draped around your chest, his lips trailing down your neck.
Your toes curled, heat running right through you. You wanted to give in. You really did. But…
You sighed. “I’m sorry, Az. I have this big exam on Tuesday. And finals are only a few weeks away.”
For some reason, that comment made his entire body stiffen. “Oh, yeah. Finals.”
You snorted. “Don’t tell me you forgot about finals.”
“No, I just… they’re soon.” His voice wavered a bit as he stood up fully. You twisted in your seat to look up at him. His brow was furrowed, his eyes swimming with anxiety. 
“What’s wrong?” You asked, reaching up and cupping his cheek with your hand. “Do you need me to help you study?” He had never seemed to care about his grades before.
He leaned into your touch for a moment, shooting you a forced smile. “No, it’s okay. I’ll be fine. I should go, and let you study.” He stooped down to press a quick kiss to your lips. “I won’t distract you anymore today.” 
Before you could even respond, he was out the door. 
You turned back to your notes, but couldn’t digest any of the information. That was… weird.
Azriel and you had been dating for months now. Though neither of you had ever put a label on it, you both knew you were exclusive. 
In the privacy of your own mind, you secretly loved that he acted so differently around you than he did out and about on campus. You felt like you got a different version of him that was saved especially for you. It made your heart swell, all the little things he did for you each day. 
You were also willing to admit, to yourself only, that you were absolutely in love with him. You had known for weeks now, and had been debating whether or not you should tell him. 
He had been the one that made you step out of your comfort zone, to try new things, to be brave. 
So, soon. You would tell him soon.
--- 
Azriel had to get out of the deal. Now.
He remembered the exact moment that he realized he was in love with you. It was a random afternoon, the two of you were watching TV at his apartment. He was laying on the couch, you were laying on top of him, your legs intertwined with his, your head on his chest. He was absentmindedly running his fingers through your hair while you giggled about something that happened on the show. 
And he had the thought. I want my whole life to look like this. 
And he knew. He loved you.
This had scared him, obviously, on multiple levels. He had never loved anyone before, never knew what that looked like. Yet somehow, he knew without a doubt that it was true. 
And then, of course, there was the deal he had made with the devil. 
He had known early on that he would have to get out of the deal. He had just been putting it off, hoping that Claire’s insanity would die down throughout the semester. 
But now his time was up. 
He prayed to whoever might be listening that Claire would listen to reason. That she would call it off. He couldn’t bear the thought of hurting you. He wouldn’t do it. 
Claire smirked as she opened the door. “I’ve been wondering when you would show up. It’s been a long time, Az,” she purred. 
Azriel stalked into her apartment, barely sparing her a glance. “The deal’s off, Claire.”
She cocked her head to the side, amused. “Oh? Why is that?”
“Because it’s insane,” he growled. “You were insane for coming up with it, and I was insane for agreeing to it. I’m done.”
Slowly, her lips curled up into a lethal smile. “You fell for her.”
Azriel blinked. 
Claire cackled. “Oh, this is rich. You actually fell for the bookworm? I never thought I’d see the day. No wonder you haven’t been crawling into my bed.”
He scowled. “The deal’s off,” he repeated in the tone he used to scare people away.
She really looked at him then, her eyes bearing into his. After a moment, she finally said, “Okay.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Okay? Just like that?”
Claire shrugged. “You were right. It was an insane plan. And it didn’t even work,” she said bitterly. “You suck at your job. She’ll still be on the top of the Dean’s list, even after all your lovey-dovey shit.”
A swell of pride ran through him at the thought of your name at the top of that list.
“Alright,” he said, his brow furrowed, trying to figure out if there was some kind of angle here. But, there didn’t seem to be one. 
He left quickly, his heart and mind feeling lighter. The guilt of how the two of you started would always be there, he knew. But now when he looked into the future, it wasn’t a hazy blur of nothingness that he saw. It was you.
---
The week before finals, there were parties everywhere. So you heard. 
You had gone to a few more with Az over the past few months. It still wasn’t exactly your thing, but you didn’t mind going, especially with Azriel being so attentive to you every time you did. 
Azriel didn’t seem particularly interested in going to this one, but his friends had been complaining that they never saw him anymore, so he agreed to go. And you had agreed to go with him, if only to take a break from your near constant studying these days.
You followed him through the crowd, his hand clasping yours, as always. Drinks in hand, you made your way to the outskirts of a group of people who were dancing and you joined them, Azriel pulling you in close to him, moving against you.
A laugh burst from you, and Azriel grinned, leaning down to kiss you. 
You were so happy, you thought. So happy in that moment with him. You knew people watched you, as they usually did when Azriel was like this with you. You didn’t care.
When he pulled back from the kiss, he gazed down at you, his eyes swimming with affection. 
“I love you,” you said before you could stop it.
His eyes sobered, and he pulled you in even closer, so your bodies were flush together. He leaned his forehead against yours, and in a crowd of people, Azriel said, a soft smile on his face, “I love you, too.”
Your heart leaped and you grinned, threading your fingers in his hair and bringing his lips to yours. 
Suddenly, the music stopped, and from the TV came a voice. Azriel’s voice. 
Everyone turned to the sound, curiously, watching. The video was jumpy, filming the floor, like it was filmed from someone’s pocket. 
Azriel tensed, his arms still around you. “Fuck,” he said. “We need to go.”
Utterly confused, you didn’t argue as he pulled you through the crowd. But you stopped dead in your tracks when you heard video Azriel say, “Sweetheart, you know I can fuck you anytime I want, right? That is not going to persuade me to help you.”
Your blood ran cold, shock jolting from your heart down to your toes. Azriel was tugging on your arm, but you didn’t budge as you heard Claire’s voice next. 
Claire. He had been talking to Claire. What did he mean, that he could fuck her whenever he wanted? You hadn’t even known that they knew each other. When was this filmed?
“Baby, please, I’ll explain everything, but we need to go,” Azriel was saying, sounding frantic. 
You wrenched your arm from his grasp, weaving through the still crowd, moving toward the TV. You heard him swear, calling your name behind you, but you kept moving.
They were saying something about a deal, about him owing her a favor. You couldn’t make sense of it, not until you heard video Azriel say, “Alright, so I just have to seduce the bookworm? Easy.”
Video Claire responded, “No, if I’m going to agree to any favor you could possibly want, you’re going to have to go further. You need to make her fall in love with you.”
It was then that you noticed Claire, next to the TV, her eyes locked on you, smirking. 
You couldn’t breathe, your legs were going to give out -- 
It was all fake. All of it. 
Azriel caught up to you then, picking you up, slinging you over his shoulder. You didn’t protest, the shock setting in. You had to get out of there, even if it was him that carried you out. 
When he made it outside, you pounded on his back with your fists. “Put me down, you asshole!”
“Sorry,” Azriel said, wincing as he gently set you on your feet. “You looked like you were going to pass out.”
“Like you even care,” you spat, storming away from him. 
“Of course I care. Please, just give me a minute to explain,” he pleaded, following you. 
“Explain what?” You stopped abruptly, spinning around to face him. “That you played me for a fool? Made me fall in love with you as a sick joke? Well, congratulations, it worked,” you said, pouring every ounce of venom that you could muster into your voice. You turned back around and continued walking as tears started pricking your eyes. You refused to let him see you cry.
“It may have started out that way, but it’s not like that anymore. From the first date, I had feelings for you. I love you. You have to believe that,” he said, right on your heels. 
You knew he could catch up with you easily if he wanted to. He was hanging back, trying to give you your space. That pissed you off even more. “How could I possibly believe that?” 
“Because you feel it, I know you do,” he said, finally wrapping his fingers around your wrist.
You tugged your hand free, but stopped walking, needing to catch your breath. You faced him. “What was the point?” You asked quietly. “Why make the deal?”
It didn’t matter. But you had to know.
He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Claire and I used to date. When you transferred, you pushed her off the top spot of the Dean’s list. She hated you for it. She said she would give me any favor I wanted if I made you fall for me… to distract you from school.”
You were so surprised that the tears you had been holding in started to fall. You angrily swatted them away. 
Azriel continued, “I said no at first, but she was persistent, and…” he took a deep breath, darting his eyes away from you for a moment. They were shining with unshed tears. “I have no excuse. I agreed to it. I’m an asshole. But you made me want to be different.”
“Was any of it true?” You heard yourself saying, your voice breaking. 
He lifted his hand, like he was about to reach for yours, then let it drop, thinking better of it. “It was all true. From our first date, you were breaking down my walls, making me smile, making me laugh.” He smiled sadly. “I fell for you. I love you,” he said, and now a lone tear did slide down his cheek. “I called it off with Claire ages ago. I told her I was out, and she agreed. I… I didn’t know she filmed it.”
You wanted to believe him, that he really did love you. But… “Even if you do love me, that doesn’t change what you did,” you said in a small voice. 
Azriel sniffed, wiping the tears off his face. “I know. I am so, so sorry.”
Shaking your head, backing away from him, you choked out, “I don’t -- I can’t. I can’t do this right now.”
He took a step toward you, his eyes pleading. “Please. Please don’t go.”
Turning your back to him, you walked away, barely registering the pavement beneath your feet, the direction you were going. 
You knew he had followed you home, not letting you walk alone at night. You watched his form retreat after you locked yourself inside your apartment with trembling hands. 
Azriel called your name, but you kept walking.
You went to bed, not even bothering to change. Laying on your back, watching your ceiling fan spin around and around, you tried to identify all that you were feeling: shame, humiliation, sorrow. Fury. 
Replaying all that had happened between you, all the times he was probably laughing at you with his friends behind his back about you. You felt nauseous. 
How could he do this? How could he have played you for so long?
You woke up to several missed calls and texts from Azriel, all sent hours apart. It seemed that he didn’t get any sleep at all.
What the hell were you supposed to do now?
I am so sorry. I’m the worst person in the world. I know that. 
I know what you’re thinking right now. I know that you’re going over it all in your head. But, it was real, baby. It was all real. I swear it was. I love you so much.
I’m hoping you’re getting some sleep. Can I see you today?
Groaning, you tossed your phone to the side, and took a long shower. By the time you got out, someone was knocking on your door. 
You quickly dressed in some old pajamas and called through the door, “Go away, Az.”
“Well, at least you’re alive,” you heard him say. “Can I please come in? Two minutes?”
You threw the door open, furious. “No, you cannot come in. You humiliated me. You used me. You had your fun. What else could you possibly want?”
Azriel was standing on the threshold, his hands in his pockets nervously, his facial expression looked like you had just slapped him. “I want to apologize! I want to make things better, that’s what I want.”
Biting your lip to keep from crying, you said quietly, “Go away.” 
His face fell. “I love you.”
Shaking your head, you said, “You don’t.”
He took a step forward, wedging his foot on the door jam so you couldn’t close it on him. “I do,” he said, his eyes pleading, baring into yours. “You know that I do. You know I’ve never let anybody else see the real me. Nobody but you.”
Tears spilled onto your cheeks then, and he wiped them away gently. Despite everything, you couldn’t back away. “It doesn’t matter,” you croaked. “You only went out with me so you could help her ruin my life.”
Azriel opened his mouth, as if to reply, but then shut it. 
You laughed humorlessly. “See? Even you don’t have a comeback.”
His eyes softened, his rough fingers still absentmindedly stroking your cheeks. “Please,” he said again. “I’m so sorry.”
“It’s not enough,” you whispered, your heart breaking all over again as you looked up at him, at the pain in his eyes.
“How do I fix it?” He whispered back, tears sliding freely down his cheeks now.
“I don’t know,” you said, stepping back out of his grasp. “Please, Az. I just -- I need to be alone right now.”
He nodded, drawing his arm across his face to wipe the tears away. “Okay. Okay, I’ll umm -- I’ll see you later?”
You didn’t know how to answer that, didn’t know if you would see him again at all. He took a step back, into the hallway. 
Especially knowing where that awful bet had originated, you refused to let Azriel and Claire get in your head for finals. You buckled down, spending entire days at the library studying, writing papers, finishing projects. 
Without another word, you shut the door.
It was helpful, actually. You didn’t allow yourself to think about him, about all the memories you had that had become so tainted and confusing. 
By the end of the semester, you had maintained all your A’s, passing every final with flying colors. And thus, secured the very top spot of the Dean’s list.
Azriel had been texting and calling every day. You left them all unanswered. 
You hadn’t yet had time to think, to process through the hurt. 
A new text chimed as you were packing up your car to head home for the summer. 
Saw the list. Nicely done, bookworm. I know it doesn’t matter, but I really am proud of you. Looks like all that hard work paid off ❤️
Despite everything, there was a swell of emotion in your chest at his words. God, why did everything have to be so awful?
Later, you were hefting your last box into your trunk when you heard the distinct sound of a motorcycle slowing down behind you. Your heart raced. You couldn’t tell if you wanted to see him again or not.
Slowly, you turned around to see Azriel sliding off the bike, his helmet tucked under his arm. “Hey, beautiful,” he said, somewhat tentatively.
“Hi,” you said softly. 
He nodded to your car, his expression grave. “You’re leaving?”
“Back home for the summer,” you said, unable to take your eyes off him. He looked tired. And sad. 
A moment passed silently, the two of you just looking at each other, pain hanging in the air between you.
“I miss you,” he said quietly. 
You sighed. Willed yourself to be brave. “I miss you, too,” you admitted. 
Something like hope gleamed in his eyes. “I love you,” he murmured. 
“I --” you started, and couldn’t bear it. “I need time.”
He looked crestfallen, like you had just punched him in the gut, but he nodded. “The summer?”
You swallowed. “Okay,” you said. “Okay. I get the summer, and I’ll find you in the fall. We’ll talk then.”
“Thank you,” he said, quietly. “Thank you for… for that. For talking to me now,” he winced. “I know I don’t deserve it.”
“No, you don’t,” you said, but there was no malice in it. You were too tired. “I get the summer, Az. Don’t contact me until school starts.”
He looked like he wanted to argue, but agreed. “Okay. I’ll see you in September,” he said, backing up towards his bike. “Have a good summer, bookworm,” he added with the slightest of smiles, before he slid on his helmet and drove away.
---
You spent most of the summer moping around, reading books, and trying to sort through everything that happened, all the feelings you had. 
For three months, you sifted through every moment that Azriel and you had shared together, picking them apart, deciphering every movement. 
It may have been slightly unhealthy.
You believed that what you and Azriel had was real. You believed that he did love you. And you couldn’t deny that you loved him. That maybe you always would. 
Was it worth it to deny yourself the person who had made you so happy? Who had taught you new things, who had helped you out of your comfort zone?
As September grew closer, you still weren’t sure. 
 ---
Azriel got more and more anxious as the summer came to a close. It had been torture to not contact you at all, but he knew he was in no position to be asking you for anything, so he did as you asked. 
The hurt on your face those months ago was still a clear image in his mind that haunted his nightmares. He would never forgive himself for hurting you. 
Yet, he couldn’t stop imagining what would happen when he saw you again. Would you give him another chance? You would have to be a saint to even contemplate that. But then again, you were the best person he had ever known. If anyone would be able to forgive, it would be you.
Scowling, he stomped that shred of hope down. He couldn’t go into this having any expectations. 
Soon, he would know.
---
It was bittersweet coming back to school. Academia was where you thrived. You felt right at home in the library, stacks of papers all around you. 
And you used to feel at home with Azriel. 
You sighed at the thought. The first day of classes was tomorrow. You had told Azriel not to contact you until school started back up again, and knowing him, he would take that seriously. 
Deep down, you knew what you wanted to do. It terrified you, though. 
Sure enough, the next morning, you had a text from him:
Hey, bookworm. Hope your first day of classes goes well. 
The slightest smile spread across your lips. You knew he was probably dying to ask when he could see you, but was trying to keep it light. Leave the ball in your court.
For the first time since everything, you texted him back.
Thanks, Az. Yours, too. 
He opened it immediately. After a moment, you willed yourself to send another:
Wanna meet up at the tennis courts tonight? 
His reply came at lightning speed:
7?
Reigning in your smile, you replied:
7.
You couldn’t remember ever being this nervous as you walked to the tennis courts. There were a few people playing, so you sat underneath a tree nearby, willing your legs to stop shaking. 
Right on time, a familiar motorcycle turned into the parking lot. He spotted you immediately, striding over to you with unsure steps. 
“Hey, beautiful,” he said quietly. 
You looked up at him, your heart racing at the familiarity you felt. “Hi,” you said, and after the briefest hesitation, you patted the grass next to you. You weren’t sure you would be able to stand. 
Immediately, he plopped down across from you, his knees only inches from yours as he faced you. 
His eyes were locked on yours. “How was your summer?” he said, his voice cracking slightly. 
“Okay,” you said. “How was yours?”
“Okay,” he said quietly. 
You took a deep breath, steeling yourself. “Okay, here’s the thing. I did a lot of thinking. A lot of thinking. And I do love you, Az.”
You paused, not sure how to word what you were feeling. 
“But?” Azriel said, his voice dripping with trepidation, his eyes guarded.
“But it’s going to take some time before I can trust you again.”
Azriel swallowed, his eyes never wavering from yours. 
He seemed like he was waiting for you to continue before he said anything, so you added, quietly, “I am willing to try, though. To give us another chance.”
The tautness in his body released, relief flooding his features. “Really?” he croaked, tears swimming in his eyes. 
You could only nod before he launched towards you, knocking you on your back, before he threaded his fingers through your hair, kissing you deeply. 
You laughed, as his other hand came up to cup your face. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, I swear I will spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you,” he said against your lips.
Wrapping your arms around him, you sighed into his kiss. “I know, Az. I know.”
“I love you,” he murmured, moving to kiss down your neck.
“I love you, too.”
“I missed you so much,” he groaned before kissing your lips again.
You giggled. “I missed you, too.”
He finally stopped kissing you, settling his elbows on either side of your head, leaning his forehead against yours. “Thank you. For giving me another chance.”
Smiling, you kissed him swiftly on the lips. “Don’t mess it up.”
“I won’t. I swear I won’t.”
The two of you spent the rest of the afternoon in each other’s arms, going over your respective summers. 
Eventually, Azriel propped himself on an elbow, gazing at you with all the love in the world.
“What?” you asked. 
He grinned. “You wanna go mini golfing, bookworm?”
You couldn’t help but return his smile. “Only if I can help you again.”
Azriel leaned down to gently kiss your forehead. “It’s a deal.”
@thalia-as-blog @saltedcoffeescotch
825 notes · View notes
ithebookhoarder · 1 day
Note
Hi! I’m not sure if you’re still taking requests for criminal minds but if you are could you do the BAU react to their so being a paramedic/firefighter? :))
If you decide to write this thank you in advance
(BAU Headcanons) If their S.O. was a paramedic/firefighter 🚨
A/N: You're very welcome! Here you are my angel. I'm always taking requests but I can't promise how long I'll take to reply and finish them 😅 Hope this is worth the wait. Also - major shout out to any first responders out there. You are literal superheroes! 💕
Warnings: Mentions of injuries, mentions of mental health, alcohol references, sexual references, references to death. (Let me know if I missed any)
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Aaron Hotchner
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Aaron would be honestly so in awe of you and what you do for a living. He’d also appreciate having a partner who understands what it’s like to have a job with unpredictable hours, such high stakes, and requires risking yourself to save people. 
As such, he would know how important it is to prioritise time together for the two of you. It’s why he is so active with forming a family calendar as he knows that, if it isn’t written in ink, you may never find an opportunity to do something. 
He is all about creating concrete plans for you both, so you have something to look forward to and actually have a chance of being able to arrange it, even if it’s months in advance. It doesn’t matter if it’s Jack’s soccer game, going for a jog in the park together, or a week-long vacation. 
However, he’s learned to be far more flexible if plans don’t work out the way you’d hoped. He’s had virtual Thanksgivings with you over the phone, a boxing-day Christmas, and even turned running errands on a day off into a date-day. 
We know Aaron would honestly hate knowing how much danger you’re in sometimes at work but he also knows he has no leg to stand on given his job and what he does every day. So, you both agree to let the other one know at least once a day that you’re ok, even if only by text. 
You’d have to agree to a ‘no work at home’ policy for you both to even stand a chance of relaxing at home and focusing on Jack (who thinks he has the coolest parents ever! Like, two superheroes for parents? He’s the luckiest kid in the world). 
Aaron would be such a proud partner too, even if he doesn’t always say it out loud. He shows it in his face every time he and Jack come to visit you at work, or when he displays a picture of you receiving an award on his desk for everyone to see. 
He even helps Jack when he asks to go as you for Halloween one year - the sight of which made you cry so hard you couldn’t even speak for a good hour after. Instead, you snap a picture and carry it with you everywhere when you leave the house, and even stick a copy in your locker. 
He’d have notifications set too, tracking incidents in your area so he knows when you may be working or out on a job. He’s also not above pulling the ‘FBI’ card if he even hears of someone making your life hard at work. 
He’d also be the biggest hypocrite, always worried you’re not getting enough sleep or eating enough, despite him running on no sleep and three expressos. 
He’d also be the first to rip into you if he found out you’d taken some unnecessary risk whilst out on a call. 
“I have enough worrying about my own idiots over here without worrying about you doing something stupid too. Please, you need to be more careful, ok? I can’t and won’t lose you. Not like that.”
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David Rossi 
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Rossi has lost many people over the years so he would definitely be terrified of losing you, and getting hurt. However, he knows what it’s like to have a passion for helping people and he’d never stop you from doing what you love and making a difference.
Besides with his crazy schedule he doesn’t mind having a partner who is mostly out working, or also operates on a crazy schedule. It’s almost complimentary, and allows you both not to miss each other too badly when you’re busy. 
Rossi strikes me as a supportive partner in his own ways. For instance, he would make massive donations to fundraisers for your department and for causes supported by your work. He wouldn’t even tell you most of the time, leaving you to work out where the mystery million dollars came from overnight after you just so happened to mention it to him over dinner. 
Speaking of dinner, he’d be keen to invite your colleagues over to his place for social functions, offering to hosts BBQs and family dinners. He’d also invite his BAU family too, knowing how nice it is for your worlds to mix and for people to relax amongst people who get what it’s like to deal with difficult issues. 
He also makes homemade dinners at least once a week, cooking enough so that you both have leftovers to take to work for the next few days. 
He’s also keen to share any recipes he can with you, so you know how to make them when you’re on shift for hours on end. 
“Just because you’re busy saving lives doesn’t mean someone shouldn’t take care of you too!”
This man would also make sure to call you whenever he gets a chance, especially if he is away on a case. He likes hearing your voice and makes sure to ask all about your day so far, knowing its good for both of you to touch base. 
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Derek Morgan
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This man would be the biggest supporter and cheerleader. Like, you know your pictures are all over his desk and he’s always bragging about how you saved someone’s life whenever he gets a chance. 
“Oh yeah, that’s my baby. They’re a literal superhero. They’re badass.”
That doesn’t mean he doesn’t worry about you when you’re away working or if he sees some major incident on the news. He’ll be refreshing his phone over and over until he sees a text from you telling him you’re ok. 
You know he will also be begging Penelope to see what she can find out too, through any means necessary (Hotch doesn’t exactly have to know about it…)
You bet your ass that if he does hear you’re hurt or if something is wrong then he will be bolting his way down to the ER or wherever you are the minute he is able to. Penelope would likely be one step ahead of him if he was unable to be there right away taking care of you until he can.
Morgan is such a good care giver too. He knows how hard it is to take care of others if you don’t take care of yourself so is King of supporting healthy habits. I’m talking meal plans so you eat right, proper sleeping habits when you can make them work, and getting out of your apartment on your days off.
He’s all for vegging on the sofa sometimes but he’s keen to support you where he can and remind you there’s a world outside of work and your home. 
He would be the kind of partner who would suggest doing things together as a couple, whether it’s a daily jog in the park or even training for some kind of race. This gives the two of you a shared goal and also shared time together - including in the shower once you get home. 
“What? It’s twice as fast this way and costs half the water bill, sweetheart.”
Also, you know this man gives the world’s best massages and he would be only too willing to give you one when you get home. He’d even try and wait up for you if he could, although you’ve come home more than once to find him passed out on the sofa. 
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Emily Prentiss
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With her track record of trusting and being betrayed by people I think Emily would be extremely anxious about having a first responder for a partner, even if she would also be totally amazed by you and thinks you’re so badass. 
Like, you can’t tell me she wouldn’t be beaming ear to ear if you ever came to visit the BAU. She would be showing you off to everyone and anyone, giving them all a face to put to the name she’s been talking about for weeks. 
“Babe, you’re amazing. You’re literally saving lives every day. All I did yesterday was fill out a stack of paperwork as big as my arm.” (She ignores the disapproving look Hotch shoots her for that comment…)
It’s just that she’s scared about losing you and it would take you both a while to work out how to make your relationship work and communicate effectively with one another about your fears. I mean, it’s not like you aren’t as equally worried about her but it takes a while for you both to accept that it’s a part of your relationship and that neither of you are willing to give your jobs or each other up. 
When she’s away on a case, or if you’re working overnight, then she won’t be able to sleep unless she sees she has a text from you telling her you’re ok and still in one piece. Of course, she prefers to be able to call if she can but knows it isn’t always possible for both of you if you’re in the middle of a shift. 
She’s a safe space so wouldn’t take it personally when you get home and have fatigue, adrenaline dumps, or just lack any potential excitement or energy for plans you made in advance. 
She’ll meet you where you are, whether it’s cancelling plans and staying in, or going out anyway because you need a distraction. As long as she’s with you then she’s happy and it isn’t like she doesn’t do the same thing after a really bad case. 
Also, we know that you’re the only one she trusts to look after Sergio when she isn’t there, knowing you will be better having someone to cuddle, feed, and look after when you’re not on shift. You become Penelope’s version of Sergio too, as Emily instructs their tech analyst to keep an eye on you both when she can’t. 
She’d be keen to spoil you from time to time and indulges on takeout, trips to the movies, and wants to take you to as many amazing places on holiday as she possibly can. She knows it’s good to travel and to have a complete break from your daily routine. Plus, she knows so many people and so many languages that you’re spoilt on choices of where to stay next. 
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JJ
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I honestly feel like JJ would struggle having a first responder for a partner. She’d be such a Momma Bear that its both wonderful and intimidating.  Like, we know she and Will worked it out eventually with him being a cop, but the fear of losing you would be a big issue for the two of you for a while. As would be navigating how you both deal with the other’s feelings after a bad day on the job. It takes some trial and error before you get into the swing of things. 
For example, she would give the best pep talks and would also know just what to say after a bad day. 
“You did everything you could, sweetheart. I am so proud of you and you saved so many lives today. You may not have been able to save that one, but they knew you tried. They knew you were there and that you cared. That’s all we can ask for in the end. You are amazing and I’ve got you.” 
When you’re both home together, or if you’ve told her you’re having a rough shift, then bath times are a must. She normally has one run, with candles lit, by the time you get in the door. She is also keen to crack open a bottle of wine, or whatever you drink you want, to help you both relax as you lie together in the warm, soapy water and just forget everything for a little while. 
She’d also insist on you both leaving voice messages for the other when you were away, so you could wish the other a ‘goodnight’. It’s comforting to her but she also likes being able to share them with Henry too. 
Speaking of phones, this ex-media liaison would have so many alerts set up and contacts to call if she even suspects you may be out on a major incident. It’s honestly kind of mind-blowing how quickly she managed to get on the phone with your superior, after hearing you could be out on a job that had gone awry. She was in a different state at the time but wouldn’t hang up until they told her what had happened, where you were, and if you were alright. 
She’s also keen to support you in a practical sense, so offers to do loads of laundry for you between shifts and also cleans the house as a way of making sure you have a nice home to come back to. You’d be sure to return the favour when you could, but she likes doing it and being able to show her appreciation for you in such a basic but important way.
JJ would be way more relaxed leaving Henry with you if she’s away, knowing your training makes you like the best possible babysitter ever. 
That, and you cannot tell me that Henry would not worship the ground you walk on. After finding out what you do for work, that little angel would make siren noises whenever you’re in the car together - something you’re keen to encourage as “everyone knows the best part of the job is turning the siren on, JJ. Duh.”
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Luke Alvez
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Luke would be so proud and so scared for you sometimes, being a first responder. 
Luke would understand that you both have super stressful jobs so is keen to suggest a ’leave work at the door’ policy unless one of you really wants to share. He knows sometimes all he wants to do after a challenging case is walk in the door and face-plant on the sofa and he’d be a hypocrite if he didn’t let you do the same… that doesn’t mean he won’t reach over and gently pull of your boots for you, and leave a glass of something on the coffee table for when you feel like it.  
He is also a firm believer that Roxie cures everything, so would be only too happy to leave her with you when he’s out of town, so you can have all the cuddles and playtime you want. 
He also walks her by your work if he gets time so you can come out and sneak a cuddle if you’re not too busy or on a job. Roxie is now your work’s unofficial therapy dog and she loves her role - and the added attention very much. (And you best know she has her own little version of your uniform too).
I feel like he’s the kind of guy who would wake up with you if you have an early start, even if he doesn’t, just so he can cook breakfast and make you coffee in your favourite to-go mug. 
“You deserve to start your day in the right way, so go and enjoy your shower, baby, and it’ll be ready for you when you come out.”
He’d also leave you stupid little love notes in your bag too, knowing they make you smile when you find them later on. You also like to keep them and stick them in your locker for luck, and normally have one tucked in your pocket too. 
He’d also recommend different kinds of music for you to listen to on shift, making you playlists you can share and add to when you’re not together. It’s got so bad your co-workers refuse to let you have the aux when you’re driving around anymore as your choices are so varied they get whiplash. 
Luke also loves getting involved wherever he can, whether it’s donating time to help organise a fundraiser, bringing pizza by work, or going with you as a date to any formal events you’re invited to. He scrubs up niceeee and he loves seeing you all dressed up formal too. 
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Penelope Garcia 
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Penelope would worship the ground you walk on and frets about you like she frets about all her BAU babies when they’re out on a case - but WORSE.
So she does what she does best and compensates with love and kindness. She takes care of the people she loves and you would know that better than anyone. This queen would totally make you care packages and would make sure you had them delivered when you’re on shift. 
“You spend all your time taking care of other people, my real life knight in shining armour. The least I can do is make sure you have some fluffy socks, face masks, and other basic pamper essentials to take care of yourself! Oh, and don’t forget the protein shake I made for you! And stay hydrated! And be safe!”
She’d make sure to send gifts for your co-workers too. It’s why she’s the favourite spouse of all your colleagues and she’s greeted like the queen she is whenever she visits. 
Her cookies have earned her the unofficial title of ‘Star Baker’ and you best know there have been physical fights over them whenever you’ve left them in the crew mess. In fact, your boss has had to give you all warnings about it as a result, calling ‘dibs’ on them if you couldn’t all be trusted to share. 
She would also give you one of her many mascots for the dashboard of your rig, knowing that the little bobblehead or whatever will remind you of her when you’re out on a call. 
Speaking of calls, you know she is tuned in to all scanners / messaging systems so knows exactly where you are at all times, but especially if there is a call out. You best believe she is making sure you’re ok and has her eyes and ears open if you need help of any kind or back-up. 
As a result, you know she has been scolded more than once by Hotch and by the local authorities for interfering and hijacking calls when she thinks you’re being ignored or need assistance. 
Penelope would also be the first person to encourage you to attend some kind of support group, or seek out some kind of therapy, to help deal with all the stressful and traumatic things you deal with on a day to day basis. She would be only too happy to help you find one and would drive you there and back when she’s able. She’d even come along if you wanted her to. 
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Dr Spencer Reid
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Spencer would be an incredibly proud partner and you know it. He would show his support in various different ways and would absolutely take any and all opportunities to remind people he’s dating a superhero (especially Morgan). He doesn’t understand why someone as amazing as you would choose to date someone like him. 
He would like giving you book recommendations so you always have something to read on shift. He’d give you his copies to borrow, so you can enjoy his pencil notes in the margins when he’s not with you. 
Not only that, but he’d also be happy to take recommendations from you too - no matter how different they may be from his usual reading material. That way you can both compare notes when you both get home and leave work behind for a moment.  
Also, you know Spence would be a fountain of knowledge about your job and has probably read up on anything he didn’t already know about your field. There isn’t a piece of jargon or code that he doesn’t know and he loves trying to use it when talking to your colleagues when he visits sometimes. It earns him their respect, which you know he would be nervous about, as your co-workers are like your second family. He’s that way with the BAU and he wants to impress the people who mean the most to you. 
His thirst for knowledge means he is always willing to let you practise different exercises on him and is keen to learn whatever you’re willing to tell him (something that has come in handy on many of his own cases). 
In return, he would like sharing whatever statistics he has memorised about the work you do. It’s also why he is so concerned about you, knowing how much your role takes out of you. His job is tiring and traumatic enough, but he is at least part of a big team and works only one case at a time. 
“I’m just saying sweetheart, it’s estimated that 30% of first responders develop behavioral health conditions including, but not limited to, depression and PTSD, as compared with 20% in the general population. If you ever want to talk to me or someone else, like a professional, then you know that’s ok.”
As much as he isn’t an overly affectionate person, I feel like he’d be the kind of person to buy you both those bracelets that you can tap and it sends a pulse to the other, letting them know you thought about them. It’s like a virtual tap on the shoulder just to let you both know they’ve got you and love you. 
He’d also drive the doctors insane if you ever got hurt on the job, yelling at them to double check their diagnosis if he even thinks you’re not getting the best treatment and care possible. 
He’d also insist on taking care of you during your recovery, not trusting anyone else to do it right - and he also has Dr Who primed for your entertainment. What could be better than that?
Masterlist
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dreamauri · 1 day
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♪ — 𝗪𝗜𝗥𝗘𝗗 𝗜𝗡? - part three max verstappen x reader (fluff) “. . . when he wants to be normal, he can count on you, stranger.”
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( fic master list | general master list ) ( requests ) ( previous | next )
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He thought he’d forgotten how to breathe, standing in his spot with his hands in his pockets, looking up at the chalkboard menu. You'd think he was a statue with how little he was moving. But then again, you weren't aware of who you were standing next to you.
"Y/N? Can we explore for a bit?" the two college-aged boys asked, making you peel your eyes off the list of foods to the interns, Max would assume. Out of the corner of his eyes, the blond could see you check your watch before nodding. 
"Yeah, sure. There's plenty of time. Meet me back here in an hour and a half so we can head over to the circuit. Deal?" Oh, that was definitely your voice. You were his Y/n. The way you talked and your voice and accent. He could now put a face to your voice, no more profile pictures.
"Deal! Thanks, Y/n." "See ya, Y/n."
"Take care, guys." Max didn't expect to run into you so soon, or be this close to you at all, even. He watched as you waved to the two interns who excitedly jogged out.
Don't come off as a creep, Max reminded himself, shaking his head and taking a step forward in the direction of the register. He'll just act cool, normal. Get himself something to drink and sit down. That helped calm him down a little, just like any other indifferent person.
It's very unfortunate for Max that his inner peace never lasts so long. Not that it was a bad thing he bumped into you. There is nothing wrong with accidentally stepping forward at the same time as you. It's just not good for his heart. Max already has to meet fans today and get in the car for fp2 and 3. You're just making his brain go haywire a little too much that he feels his eyes are going to turn static and face turning the shade of Charles' Ferrari.
"Sorry." He tried to apologise, stepping back, feeling his body stiff and turning to stone. 
"Désolée," you went to apologise only to look up and meet eyes with the three time world champion. "oh- im so sorry."
"No, it's ok." Max smiled nervously, meeting your eyes for the first time, which honestly made him feel mesmerised.
"Here, you can go," you stepped back, offering the blond to step to the cashier. 
"No, no. Ladies first." he shook his head, cutting you off when you went to argue back. "—I insist."
Max was kind of disappointed that you felt so nervous and acted so polite upon recognizing him. He wished you would've treated him like normal, the same way you talk to him as amilian or the same way you would talk to a stranger who wasn't looking where he was going and bumped into you.
He knows it's not fair that he's pushing his expectations on you, though. Anyone would react the same way upon meeting a very important or famous person. Max just wished he was standing beside you in line instead of behind you. Having a friendly conversation, telling you how much you'll love the cheesecake.
He'll have to settle for sitting on a table not too far from you for now, sipping from his paper cup while scrolling through his phone.
★ ☆ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
y/n — 'I bumped into Max 😓' 
Max himself, glanced up to where you were sitting, catching you looking away quickly, face turning a deep shade of red.
y/n — 'And now he thinks I'm stalking him!!' y/n — 'million help 😭😭'
Max chuckled slightly, feeling his heart ease. You were overthinking things. He wished he could sit beside you and pat your back until you calmed down. But he can't really do that, can he? Max calming you down after you get all nervous and anxious meeting him? The situation gets sadly funnier the further Max plays into it and thinks about it.
Max — 'What did you do ⁉️' he sent back in the chat
y/n — 'I went to the café you told me about, and i think i accidentally stepped on his foot 😭😭' y/n —  'I ruined his shoes! And he needs his foot to drive the car!!!' y/n —  'He must hate me' y/n —  'He saw me looking at him too' y/n —  'Must think i’m a weirdo
"Not at all." He mumbled, a soft smile covering his face. You're just feeling anxious. He could care less about his shoes, and his foot is fine. He didn’t even realise you stepped on it. 'relax, deep breath' he sent, seeing you fill your chest and release as told.
Max — 'you're fine' 'don't overthink things'
y/n — '🥺' You were actually pouting.
Max — 'Do you want me to text him and apologise on your behalf?' 
A weird offer. Apologising to himself for you even though he wasn’t mad, but grateful he saw you today. 
y/n — 'NO!!!!' 'NO NO NO!' 
Max — 'Do you want me to get you a pass for the meet and greet?'
y/n — 'THAT'LL MAKE IT WORSEEE'
Max — 'Ok, ok' 
Max thought for a moment, sitting back. 'Count from one to ten' He was actually surprised that you did as told, listening to him, closing your eyes and taking a deep breath for ten seconds.
Max — 'What did you order?' Start a conversation, comfort and distract her. He's good at that.
y/n — 'A mocha, the one you told me about'
Max — 'You should try the cheesecake, the one with strawberry jam on top.' He typed back. 
y/n — 'I didn't see that on the menu?'
Max — 'Trust me' Max — 'You'll love it'
y/n — 'Ok, ok, i trust you a million' y/n — ‘But not right now’ y/n — 'I'll stop by after finishing with stuff at McLaren’ y/n — 'I'm not hungry rn’ y/n — 'Wish you were here'
Max — 'Yeah, i'd be stealing that cheesecake from you' 
y/n — 'Don't you dare!! 😠'
Max chuckled, you were really expressive with your face as you typed. He saw you frowning to match the emoji, but there was still a hint of a smile. He liked that smile, he loved it. He loved you overall. 
You were real. If only Amilian was real. If only he could sit beside you and tease and joke with you. 
Max — '🫵😏' 'Max texted me!'
y/n — 'WHAT?!!!!????!!' 
He could see you jump in your seat a little before trying to act cool even though it was clear you were anxious.
Max — 'He texted me about a cute girllllll who he bumped intooooo' 
y/n — 'AMILIAN COME PICK ME UPP 😭'
He couldn't help the smile that curled on his face.
Max — 'I’m joking, I’m joking' Max — 'hahaha' He leaned back, sighing happily.
y/n — 'ofc you are' y/n — 'No way he thinks i'm cute'
Max — 'I mean you dress up like it's fashion week' Max — 'Compared to him, he could use some advice'
y/n — 'His outfit is actually not that bad today' y/n — 'Baggy white pants!!' y/n — 'And a blue shirt!!!!!'
Max — 'Wow, you serious?' Max — 'No way' He typed even though he is wearing that.
y/n — 'tbh it makes him look even more pretty'
Max — 'Pretty?’ Max — ‘He's a guy' 
y/n — 'What, a guy can’t be pretty?' y/n — 'Max is cute’ y/n — ‘Especially when he's having fun and smiling'
Max — 'The guy looks like a gremlin.' He didn’t even realise he was smiling, feeling fuzzy inside. Max — ’Sid the sloth, Netflix rerun’
y/n — 'Don't insult him!!' y/n — 'Take it back' y/n — 'He’s handsome and beautiful and amazing!' y/n — 'Any woman would be lucky to have him'
Max — 'You just dug your own grave' Max — 'I believe you fall into the *any woman* category'
y/n — 'No no no, pleasee' y/n — 'You'll embarrass me'
Max —’That's my job’ Max — 'I'll simply put in a good word for you'
y/n —'amiliaaaaaan 😭😭'
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pomefioredove · 1 day
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hellooo! i saw you're taking requests! if it's okay with you id like to request floyd, jamil and ace with a sleepy reader just coming into their dorm room during the day and curling up by their side. thanks!
as a fellow sleepy guy I so get this
summary: sleepy reader type of post: headcanons characters: ace, floyd, jamil additional info: platonic or romantic, reader is gender neutral, reader is not specified to be yuu, short
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𝐀𝐜𝐞 𝐓𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐥𝐚
if you ask to sleep in his room, he'll say no
just his natural instinct
but he won't get upset if you do happen to fall asleep next to him
at least you're not bothering him
...and you're kinda cute like this
not that he'd ever admit that in those words
he honestly just gets used to it
might use you as an arm rest, or a table to put stuff on
and if you end up curling up at his side, he won't even tease you about it later!
plus, if he gets caught for not doing his homework, he can just say you fell asleep on him and he couldn't move you
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𝐅𝐥𝐨𝐲𝐝 𝐋𝐞𝐞𝐜𝐡
squeezable?
...squeezable
finds it absolutely adorable and entertaining, most of the time
definitely gets used to it really fast
as in, the first time you do it, he accepts it right away and falls asleep next to you
will whine and mope around when you don't show up on days where he could go for a squeeze
on days where he doesn't feel like it, he'll pick you up and carry you around with him like a cat
does not matter what you weigh, he will be dragging you around like you're his favorite stuffed animal
actually a pretty good cuddler
9/10
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𝐉𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥 𝐕𝐢𝐩𝐞𝐫
the first time you do it, he wakes you up
pokes you with his pen until you get out of his bed. he values his personal space, and his alone time, after all
the second time he just gets up and leaves
he's got other things to be doing, anyway. not like he really needs the bed all the time
plus, waking you up is such a hassle
by the third, he's learned to accept it when you come in and curl your body around him as he's trying to focus on throwing his assignment scores
you're warm, and comfortable, and as long as you're treating this as casually as you do, he has no reason to suspect you're up to anything
he even checks to make sure you're really sleeping a few times
...just in case
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momowritings · 3 days
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K i l l i n g M e S o f t l y
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Pairing: Toji Fushiguro x Female Reader
Summary: It's hard to compete with a ghost. Especially when that ghost was Toji Fushiguro's wife.
Wrd Ct: 20k
tags: angstyyy, established relationship, complicated relationships, non curse au, vaginal sex, missionary, wall sex (?), oral sex (f receiving), breeding kink, DILF Toji, grief/mourning, Toji is trying to be a good dad to Megumi, Toji has a praise kink, mentions of mamagumi, open ending
Part One, Part Two
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Part Two
You managed to speak a grand total of five words from the time you got into bed with Toji to the moment you all sat in the car to watch Megumi board the train. Good night, good morning, and thanks. He wasn’t going to take more than he was given, but the way you even avoided his gaze was really getting under his skin. Both of his hands were glued to the steering wheel as he drove, and the music playing from the radio was the only thing to break the heavy silence in the car. 
When you all arrived at the station, you held Megumi in your arms, giving him a tight hug. “Don’t be a stranger, alright? Please take care of yourself. And take your vitamins!”
Megumi laughed. “I’m still going to visit on the weekends.”
“I guess that’s true. I’m impressed that you go to a top school but it sucks that you have to live there. I was hoping to push off this experience until you got to college,” you sniffed. Megumi gave you one of his signature soft smiles.
“I’ll call you, I promise.”
“Thanks, Megs, but also, have fun. I’m not trying to smother you.” 
Behind you and Megumi was Toji who watched you talk. Megumi caught his gaze over your shoulder. Toji gave you both enough space that you weren’t within earshot so Megumi could speak freely. 
“I know it’s not really my place to talk about it…. but my dad really likes you. And I like having you around too. Please don’t give up on him yet.” 
Megumi eyed his father again who was fiddling with the handle of his suitcase, trying his best to look unbothered. Toji has a lot of faults, yes, but Megumi could tell that he was trying. Megumi hated to think that a good thing for his dad was going to end so soon.
“I’m trying to be more understanding,” you said honestly. You turned your head to the side, looking at Toji out of the corner of your eye. “And I love your dad. You don’t have to worry about us, okay?” 
You patted Megumi’s head and Toji finally came up behind you, giving his son an awkward pat down that was supposed to be a hug.
“Study hard. Remember how I taught you how to hold a knife and how to use it. Don’t stay out too late.” 
“Thanks, Dad.” 
You snorted at the short exchange, and you and Toji both watched Megumi get on board. You waved until the boy was too small to see through the window, then stood quietly together. 
“I need to visit my friend later today. I’ll probably stay over there tonight.” 
Toji raised his brow at you. You were really determined to stay away from him. 
“This is the first time you mentioned this.”
You shrugged your shoulders and started to make your way back to the car. “I can’t predict when her ain’t-shit boyfriend is going to break her heart.” 
Toji frowned. It didn’t have to be a double meaning, but he felt like it was. “Do you want me to drop you off?”
“Hmm, no thanks. If anything happens while I’m over there I’d like to have my own car.”
“Right… Anything else?”
You stood in front of the car door he opened for you. With your eyebrows drawn together you shook your head. “Are you expecting anything else?”
“No. Let’s go.”
Halfway back home you took Toji’s hand just to hold. You didn’t say anything, and he didn’t ask any questions, but when you laced each of your fingers in between his heart calmed down. He brought the back of your hand up to give it a kiss. Toji was getting into his own head. Maybe you weren’t trying to avoid him. He still had the chance to fix this. 
When you got home you went right to packing your bag for your overnight stay. Toji watched you at the doorway, his arms crossed and his frown deepening. Not that he didn’t care for your friend but fuck did she have the worst timing. You folded over one of his hoodies to put in a duffle bag and he walked up behind you, carefully holding your waist to not break the delicate beads that you wore, and rested his head on your shoulder. You took a shower in the morning but he could still smell the shea butter scents on your skin. He took a deep breath in and sighed. You continued to fold clothes into your bag, trying to ignore his wandering hands that had your breath catching. 
“What am I going to do with you gone?”
“I’m sure you’ll find some home project that needs improving,” you snorted.
“I’ll miss you. I mean it.” 
You turned around to meet Toji’s eyes and wrapped your arms behind his neck. He gripped you even tighter, your back curving to his touch. He wondered if you could hear how fast his heart was beating in his chest. The idea of you staying mad at him before you left was eating him up and he needed the reassurance that you two were okay. 
“Want me to cook something for you before I leave? I can make your favorite.”
Instead of answering, Toji hovered his mouth over yours. The tip of his nose brushed your cheeks, deciding on which side he should tilt his head. With parted lips you both shared the same air, silently waiting for the other to take the first step. 
“Can I kiss you?”
You released a breathy laugh. “Since when did you start asking?” He held your chin with his thumb, and he dipped your head back to cover your lips with his. With a familiar hunger he gently pushed you on the bed, fumbling to get your bag on the floor without spilling all the contents inside. 
“Toji–” you mumbled into his mouth, trying to clear the fog that was in your head. You weren’t mad, not as much as you were in the morning at least, but this still wasn’t the best idea. Not without having a serious conversation. 
However, talking could wait after he was done working his tongue on you. 
Toji left red hot trails down your body, littering your neck and chest until he got disrupted by your clothes. He took off your top with ease, taking time to admire your bronzy skin before resuming his worship. He lapped at one nipple and rolled the other with his thumb and forefinger until you were squirming beneath him, just to switch off and continue the tortuous process. Toji didn’t stop until you were panting. You grabbed a handful of his hair to pull him off your breast to smash your lips on his mouth. 
You directed his hand to cup your sex, grinding shamelessly to get him to move on. Toji grinned in the middle of the kiss. He loved it when you dropped your reservations and started to want him in the same fashion. Your fingers scraped his scalp and he groaned, resuming his path down the hills and valleys of your body, stopping once he reached your navel to slowly slip off your shorts. He swirled his tongue over your belly button while removing your shorts and it sent a shock up your spine. 
“You’re always into weird shit,” you groaned. Toji couldn’t do anything other than chuckle. He’s still on the tip of the iceberg of all the things he wanted to do to you, but he would get you there someday. With your legs bared he could finally see how you were dripping wet for him. Ever the tease he sucked on his two middle fingers, taking them out with an obnoxious pop to drag them over your folds. You arched your back to his touch, breathlessly urging him to give you more. 
“I thought you always say that I rush it,” he smirked. His fingers glided over your sex, rubbing circles on your clit before dipping inside of your heat. You mewled, twisting underneath him, your chest rising and falling rapidly. “You could always stay home so it could last longer.”
“Je- ah! -Jess needs me,” you whimpered when his fingers curled against your spot that brought tears to your eyes while putting his thumb on your clit. Tears brimmed your eyes, a look that Toji enjoyed looking at and he climbed up again to kiss them away. He licked the salty liquid off of his lips, straying from your eyes so he could reach the junction of your neck. Toji continued to stimulate both spots, his fingers reaching deep inside of you and his thumb drawing out moans from you until you were kicking the sheets on the bed. 
“I need you,” Toji murmured in your skin. He was unsure if you heard him. You gazed at him with watery eyes but you were too overcome with your speeding climax to catch what he said. He dropped to his knees, dragging you to the edge of the bed and threw your legs over his shoulders. He left butterfly soft kisses on the inside of your thighs, his fingers grazing over your quivering thighs until you gripped his hair.
“Don’t you wanna make it up to me?” You asked in a husky voice. The edges of your sentence trembled with anticipation and a challenge. His eyes widened then darkened at your words. He couldn’t really tell what you were thinking. He hated that; being left in the dark and completely at your mercy. This was his chance to have you only focus on him and how good he could make you feel. 
Toji buried himself nose deep in between your legs, lapping up your arousal and you thrashed around in his tight grip, drenching his tongue with your come. Your thighs threatened to crush his head between your thighs. Toji didn’t mind it, only continuing his onslaught against your sanity. Your hips drew back away from him, looking for a break only for his mouth to follow incessantly. It wasn’t until you dragged his head out from your cunt that you got relief, but as soon as you did you still wanted more. 
You could taste yourself on his tongue when you pulled him up, the remnants of your orgasm evident, shiny on his lips and down his chin. You were on your knees on the bed, making you the same height as him, and with your mouths welded together you worked your hands to get him out of his pants. Toji stood painfully hard. The moment you started to stroke his hot length a guttural groan escaped his lips. You kissed his jaw and neck until you got to his shirt. 
“Take this off,” you ordered in a thick voice, and within the next second his shirt was flung to some obscure corner of the room. You harshly bit his shoulder  once you had access to his pale skin, then ran your tongue over the area to soothe it. 
“You know how to take care of me, baby,” you whispered in his ear, telling him exactly what he needed to hear. Over time you learned that Toji enjoyed the praise that fell from your lips, craved for it. His ears would take a fiery shade when you complimented him outside of the bedroom, so naturally it carried on inside of it as well. You took only a moment to break away to spit in your hand, mixing the saliva and precum that gathered to glide over him. You bumped noses with Toji to get him to focus on your face. He looked at you through his dark lashes and you focused more on his frenulum, making a tight circle right below his tip and his eyes rolled back into his head. His hand that rested on your hip had nails that dug into your skin. You thumbed his slit and spoke in his ear again. 
“You’ve always been good to me,” you murmured. “Just take me like you mean it.”
You were on your back once again, pressed deep in the sheets with Toji deep in you. Every attempt to say his name was lost by his movements. Toji fucked you just as you asked, leaving no room for you to doubt him. He was rough, pushing you into different positions that made his length reach the end of you, his mouth sloppily covering yours until you were gasping for air. When he flipped you on your stomach, Toji’s unabashed moans went directly in your ear, fucking you through another orgasm out of you with his hand squeezing the front of your neck. He twisted, bit, and sucked your nipples so much prior that the collapsed position on the bed made them hypersensitive against the sheets. The tears rolling down your face attested to it. Your hands were clawing at the sheets from the overwhelming sensations. 
Toji wondered if you could feel the desperation coursing through him. The apologies he wasn’t good at, the sincerity, the need he has for you, his love. He hoped it all translated well with every touch even if it was rough around the edges. It wasn’t until you were shaking again, your cunt messy from another climax that his strokes shortened. Toji threaded his fingers through your hand that was outstretched above your head, and you latched onto him like a lifeline. You cried out when he slammed into you one last time, painting your insides white. 
He was resting in you, barely holding himself up to keep from crushing your frame completely. You shook off his hand that was holding him to snake it up to the back of his neck, pulling him down to your side for one last kiss. It was salty from sweat and tears yet sweet, clumsy, and reassuring. You were clearly tired, and he was still inside of you, but you were no longer in a rush to leave. You deflated back into the bed and Toji got up to get a wet cloth to wipe you down. Once you were clean he laid beside you and you gave him a sleepy smile, your eyelids half open. 
“You win, for now. I’m too tired to go anywhere right now. Wake me up in an hour,” you murmured, already falling asleep by the end of your sentence. You looked so peaceful when sleeping, like all was well and there were no problems between the two of you. Toji wished that he could sleep untroubled in the same manner, but all he could do was watch you drift away with his arms around you.
~*~
Toji stared at his empty phone after he got off of a call with you. You had just let him know that you were at your friend’s house, and Megumi was away doing school stuff, so he was alone on a weekend, something that hasn’t happened in a very long time.
He poked at the device, his mind wandering. There were things to do, he would find something to do, but instead he typed in “therapists near me” in the search engine. It couldn’t be that bad. You were right, he never officially went through a grieving process, whatever the hell that meant. His wife died and the next ten years were a blur. He happened to run into his son and Megumi didn’t even know who he was. He never knew how much he looked like his mother and it snapped something back into place in Toji’s brain. All he knew is that he had to fix what he ruined all those years ago.
The fixing was still in process, and Megumi lets him off the hook way more than he fucking should, but maybe that’s why the mistakes and dreams were happening so often. Toji got his son back, he found you, and his life was… normal. It was something that he wanted since he was a child, but it came only after her death. His stormy life has finally become calm and now he has to sift through the broken pieces left behind. 
Toji turned off his phone after reading reviews of a counselor. They all seemed full of shit. Clients talked about their feelings for a month and suddenly they were doing a lot better? Right. The feelings he had will pass, they always do. He didn’t need someone to tell him that what happened all those years ago fucked with his mind. The gap in his memory was a clear indicator already. He didn’t want to go poking around there either. 
After long deliberation Toji decided to go to a bar he used to frequent in the beginning of the relationship. The both of you became homebodies the longer you dated, but after he brought you there the first time it was the one place he found that the two of you could agree on going first and letting the night play out after when you weren’t to sure on what else do to for date nights but wanted to get out of the house. Upon entering and taking his section on the counter the familiar face of one of the bartenders came to serve him. With a smile without words she immediately started to prepare a cosmo for him out of habit, because it was something you ordered. Toji had to stop the bartender once he realized what she was doing. 
“She’s not with me tonight.”
Her eyes went wide with surprise. The only woman Toji continually had around him was suddenly no longer here. Toji could see the stories building up in her head and immediately put a stop to it. 
“She’s out with her friend. Girl’s night.”
“Ah, that makes sense. I was worried there for a second,” the bartender giggled. “Just water for you still?” 
“Actually, I’ll have a glass of whisky. Neat.”
Once again the eyebrows on the bartender almost touched her hairline. He has never taken a sip of alcohol no matter how many times he stepped foot inside of the bar, no matter what sugary concoction you ordered, so she never thought she’d see the day. She snapped out of her astonishment when Toji gave her an annoyed stare and quickly made his glass. She slid it over to him and he drank it in a flash. 
“Another one,” he ordered, and gingerly she took the glass. 
Toji eyed the TV overhead, half listening to the program playing when he heard a familiar voice come from beside him. The bartender handed him his second glass when the guest guffawed at Toji. 
“I didn’t think I would ever see you again.” A sharply dressed Korean man slipped into the seat next to Toji at the bar and it made him gawk for a second. As always, a cigarette hung from the other man’s lips, unlit and carefully balanced. His tie that he usually wore was nowhere around his neck, and the top buttons of his shirt were undone.
“Well you did say the only time you ever want to see me again is in hell,” Toji remarked after the moment of unexpectedness passed. 
“That I did say. Almost thought I died for a second.” Toji gave the man a side eye, then they both let out wry laughs. 
“What are you doing here, Shiu?” 
“Nothing you’re interested in. I heard you retired.”
“Heard right,” Toji grunted. He stared down his glass and downed the rest of the ambery liquid. It stung on the way down, but he was on the third glass and still didn’t feel any buzz like he had hoped. Drinking never did much for Toji. He didn’t know why he thought tonight would be any different.
“Never thought I’d live to see the day.” Shiu shook his head in disbelief. He worked with Toji when he was at his lowest for years doing unsavory business. He knew that he was dealing with a broken man, someone who would take anything that was given to him because it would be better than working with his blood relatives, so when the news finally got around to him he couldn’t believe that Toji finally decided to stop working underground. He had a hard time imagining what Toji could do anywhere else. Seeing him in the flesh, alive and relatively well was a sight to behold. 
“Usually I wouldn’t pry because it’s none of my goddamn business, but I’m feeling a little loose tonight. What made you leave? What do you do now?”
Toji waved down the bartender to fill his glass once again, and he gulped the drink down with a sigh before answering. “I got my kid back and I teach other spineless fuckers how to defend themselves for a living.” 
Shiu gave him an incredulous look. “Megumi lives with you? And you just help people now?”
“Yeah. Why do you look like that’s impossible for me to do or something?”
“The last time I asked you about your kid you didn’t even remember his name and you used to blow people’s brains out for cash. Sorry if I find it hard to believe,” Shiu chuckled. 
“Better believe it.”
“So what’s the problem? I find you here after all this time, drinking when you told me before that it has no effect on you. The only other thing that made you this way was lady issues.” 
Toji ran his finger over the edge of his glass silently. If Shiu wasn’t being annoying before, he was now. 
“Seriously? You? You married again? Third time’s the charm,” Shiu winked.
“I’m not married.”
“If she’s not your wife then why the hell are you moping around like this?”
“Fucking hell, Shiu. I like you better when you don’t talk.” 
“Suck it up. You’ve piqued my interest.” 
Shiu finally lit the cigarette that he held in his lips and called the bartender over for his drink. After a long drag, Shiu released the smoke. It billowed up in front of both of the men, its tendrils grazing Toji’s face that made his nose itch. 
“So you got a woman. She’s not your wife but what, you’re thinking about marrying her? Being nervous about that kind of thing is not something I believe would bother you so no, that’s not it. But maybe it is. Maybe marriage isn’t the problem right now, but it will be pretty soon. And seeing how you suddenly got soft, a fight that you guys had is shaking you up. You’ve always been pretty attentive to the few women in your life that you actually liked outside of a place to sleep.”
“Shut the fuck up,” Toji gritted. 
 “Right on the money,” Shiu smirked. “I happen to like you more when you don’t take yourself as seriously. So what is it? She must be terrible and won’t let you do anything or you guys are fighting all the time and you’re starting to think it’s not worth it.” 
“Neither. Believe it or not, I’m the problem.” 
“I figured. I was just trying to be on your side for a little bit.”
Toji stared down at the empty cup as he spoke. The words were moving faster than the ability he had to actually process what he was admitting to. It seems like all the drinks were finally catching up to him. He confessed everything before he could bring himself to shut up. 
“We’ll be doing great, her and I, and then Megumi’s mom starts showing up again. She lurks in my mind, haunts my dreams, creeps into our lives. I'm calling my late wife’s name instead of her and it’s breaking her down. She doesn’t even want to be around me right now.” 
It was so silent between them that Toji had to look up to Shiu. He had the stick between his fingers, the ember smoldering and Shiu’s eyebrows were raised for the umpteenth time. 
“Of all the things you could have said, I wasn’t expecting that. Could you blame the girl?” “Why do you think I’m here?”
“Give her some time to cool off but you fucked up.”
Toji tried to wave the bartender over once again but Shiu stopped him. Toji gave him a hard stare, one that could kill a man if the man wasn’t Shiu. 
“I know you don’t do this often but you will be shit faced if you keep that up. Leave now while you can still walk in a straight line.”
“Yeah right.” Toji shrugged him off. He didn’t feel that much different, but he took Shiu’s advice. He left a hefty tip in his place and left the bar, getting in his car and driving on autopilot until he suddenly was in front of a graveyard. Toji hasn’t been here before, even the day that they buried her. He was just told the location and avoided it at all costs. 
Your voice rings in his ear again, telling him that he could talk to you about his wife if it made it easier. It still baffled him how he managed to find someone as understanding as you when he didn’t even have the balls to attend the funeral. Her grave was, as expected, large, gray, and cold. He stood in front of it, not saying anything, dusting off the leaves that piled on the top of the stone. 
“I met someone new,” he started, shocking himself but he kept going. “I think you’d like her. She’s like you in some things, completely different in others.” 
Wind blew through Toji’s hair and he realized that he left his jacket in the car. Or maybe at the bar. He hoped that wherever you were you had a jacket. You got cold so easily, your fingers turning to icicles at the slightest temperature drop. 
“I’m taking care of Megumi the best way I can. I fucked up in the beginning, almost ruined everything, but he’s a great kid. All his best qualities are from you.” Toji sighed and looked up at the starless sky. There was no moon either, just an expanse of darkness that stretched in all directions. A helicopter with blinking lights passed through his vision, breaking the sea of black.
“I love her. You’d probably say some shit like you want me to be happy, and I’m trying to be. It’s harder than it looks,” Toji huffed out a dry laugh. He looked back at the grave.
“Thank you.”
~*~
When you showed up to Jess' place she was exactly how you expected her to be; angry. She had heavy metal music blaring through her speaker so loud you worried for her neighbors. She was actually in a much better mood than you expected. Before when she had first broken up with her boyfriend (along with the second and third time), you were welcomed to big, soppy tears running down her face and a handful of tissues clenched tight in her fist. You guessed that with each breakup Jess hardened her heart more until there were no more tears left to give and only anger remained.
You let her get her emotions out, tidying up the place while she told you every shitty thing her boyfriend did, things that you had said that he was going to do because you already knew that he was bad news, until she was out of breath from screaming and talking and finally sat down on the couch with you. 
“Feeling better now, babe?”
Jess held a pillow in front of her and her face was obscured by it, her answer coming out muffled. “No.” 
“But you will be. He was only holding you back,” you reassured. 
“Yeah. Sure. Whatever. I hope he falls in a ditch somewhere.”
“Me too,” you said, handing her a wine glass and you both sat in silence for a few beats. You were lost in your thoughts full of Toji when Jess called out your name. 
“Your boyfriend– his last name is Fushiguro, right?”
“Yeah, why?”
“I was talking to a client today. More like listening in on his conversation. Real sick fucker, kept calling all the girls sluts and whores, and not in a cute way. Unfortunately, he wanted me to dance for him in the booth, and I heard him talk about Toji. I mean, I don't know about you, but I don’t think that there’s that many Toji's out there. Anyway, this blond motherfucker keeps talking about trying to find a way to bring Toji back into the family. Whether he means that literally or it’s some yakuza shit, I don’t know. What I do know is that he said that he wished he knew if Toji was with anybody so that they can use them to bring him in. Obviously your Toji’s girlfriend now, and you mentioned that he used to have a wife. I just thought it was strange. This guy’s last name was Zen’in though. He mentioned it like, 50 times. I think he’s supposed to be important.”
“It’s gotta be some type of coincidence.”
“Yeah, I fucking hope so. Do you really know Toji? I mean blondie was a bitchboy but the other guys he was surrounded with… I don’t know. If it is your Toji, he’s dangerous.”
“… Toji isn’t like that.”
Jess gave you a hard stare. Neither of you believed the lie you were trying to convince yourself of. You knew that Toji must be a lot more dangerous than he let on, but it seemed to be in the past. 
“Anymore! Whatever he did before he met me is none of my concern. He has a kid that he’s very devoted to and he’s been… well he says that he loves me. I just have to trust him.”
“Right, until he gets you killed.”
“Jess!”
“Don’t shoot the messenger! I’m not wishing any harm on you, just be careful.” 
“Oh wow thanks for putting that thought in my head,” you sarcastically grumbled. You huddled yourself in a small ball on her couch and didn’t notice Jess studying you intensely. 
“So what’s up with you?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean you barely talked about Toji since you came in.”
You gave you a pointed look. “You called me on the phone crying that you're finally over your boyfriend and I’m supposed to talk about mine?”
“True… but this feels different. You didn’t even bring him up in passing. You’ve said nothing about Toji.”
“Right now it is about you, love.” It was a dodgy answer, both you and Jess knew it, and she stared you down until you cracked and told her what had happened the night before and everything preceding it. She winced at the mention of Toji’s late wife the same time you did and went into deep thought. 
“So how are you feeling?”
“Like an asshole. I know it’s really not his fault.”
“You have been dating for how long now?”
“Gonna be six months pretty soon.”
“Six months? You’re better than me,” Jess side-eyed you. 
“He was married. That’s a big deal.” You didn’t even know why you were getting defense for Toji. It’s been bothering you too, a lot more than you let out to him. Now you felt like you actually had a reason to pull back instead of it all being in your head. 
“Married yeah, but been with you for a while now. You’d think he’d try not to mix you up. What if… what if you’re a replacement? Like he doesn’t actually see you. ”
The thought has crossed your mind before and you fell into a deep silence. If you had been asked this just a few weeks ago you would’ve confidently been able to say no. However, now… now it seemed totally plausible. 
“You could remind him of his wife so much and that’s why he likes you.”
“Stop,” you muttered, but Jess didn’t hear you. 
“I know you don’t know anybody who was close to her but what if you two look alike? What if—“
“Shut up! What is wrong with you?” 
“I was just saying—“
“It’s his late wife, and I’m not anything like her.” Your voice was cold and heavy, settling in the air with a deadly finality. Jess was stunned, but then she gave you a saddened smile. 
“You don’t know that, but you’re right, I'm meddling again. You know what we should do? Go out. I’m tired of being the entertainer, I want to be entertained.” 
You were grateful for the change of sec energy after the conversation, even if you had to get ready in a whirlwind. Jess put you in one of her dresses and you were glad that you two were similar sizes and styles. You choses a simple silk dress that went down just past your knees with a high collar but an open back. Jess, who never gave up the chance to show off her legs, donned a plum dress with a halter neck and a skirt that flared and stopped mid thigh . Low yet stylish black heels were clad to both of your feet, as you decided that you would take a taxi and walk to the club instead of trying to find parking with your car. To your surprise Jess chose a jazz club, and music poured from the open door down the street, soothing and flowing like honey that calmed your soul. Immediately you thought of how you would love to go here again with Toji and you shook the thought out of your head. 
“I'm here with Jess,” you muttered to yourself. 
 Jess turned around and cocked her head to the side. “Did you say something?”
“No. Nothing. Let’s head inside.” 
“Are you sure you’re okay?” 
The night was supposed to be about Jess, and you weren’t going to let her focus on you like this. You dragged her inside of the establishment, your eyes adjusting to the dimly lit space covered in a thin veil of smoke. You couldn’t hear it from the sidewalk, but now inside here was a woman singing on the stage. The embodiment of old Hollywood, a silver sequined dress glittered on her smooth, caramel skin as she sang romantically into the mic. Her body swayed side to side, getting lost in the music, drowning in it, and you wished that you could be absorbed by the melody like she was. 
It was Jess’s turn to drag you around since you fell into the trance of the singer, and she chose a booth tucked away on the wall. You still had a great view of the stage, but close enough to the bar.
Jess went to do her thing, standing at the bar and sitting pretty and batting her eyes to the people around her. It didn’t take long for a drink to be offered to her, and it worked like a charm every single time. You had thought that was the case for you as well when a strawberry margarita was brought to you at the table by a waiter, but when they pointed in a direction opposite of Jess you were more inclined to search for the sender. 
A familiar face, or rather faces, gazed back at you. White tufts of icy hair, crystalline blue eyes peering about black circular shaded, and a million watt smile flashed at you while the other face had dark pupils and sharper eyes, but a comforting grin you knew well. 
You waved for Satoru Gojo and Suguru Geto to come over to your section with a wide smile. 
“Satoru? Suguru? What are you guys doing here?”
You stood up to hug the both of them and inspected their faces. It has only been a few years since you last saw them in college. Gojo’s hands remained on your back while Surugu gave you a recap of the last few years without you. Just then, Jess came back with two drinks in her hand and a confused look. You quickly introduced her to your old friends. 
“Jess! This is Suguru and Satoru… I met them back in college,” you explained. As soon as Suguru’s name left your mouth Jess zeroed in on him with a seductive stare. 
“So you're one of her friends. I was afraid that I was the only one she got,” Jess purred. She didn't even bother with Satoru, only giving him a quick nod of acknowledgement before giving her undivided attention back to Suguru. 
“It looks like you’ve been taking good care of her,” Suguru praised, returning the interest with his own heavy gaze. When he took Jess’s hand you couldn’t believe your eyes. You lost your friend to Suguru the moment he opened his mouth. Turning to Toru instead, you pulled him down to sit next to you. 
“While they do that over there,” you said, “Tell me what’s been going on with you! Are you still drinking straight sugar for the hell of it?” “Ha-ha,” Satoru laughed dryly. A bright smile was still plastered on his face. You took him in full, his casual black t-shirt and thighs clad with dark washed jeans, and his signature black frames pushing up his hair and framing his face. He wore a fresh and sweet smelling cologne that even you would get. On the outside, Satoru seemed great. However, you’ve known him for a long time, managed to become someone who he cared enough about to call a friend and you took the title seriously. You knew how well he hides his emotions because he’d rather keep things light. He did it extremely well that sometimes it was hard to tell what exactly could be wrong. 
“Stop psychoanalyzing me before you burn holes through my head. 
“That’s my line, high beams.” you shoved him with your shoulder. “I just feel like we never talk anymore. I’ve missed you.”
A sly smile crept over his face. “Told you that America wasn’t all that. You just had to learn it the hard way.” “Yeah, you’re right there.” You took large gulps of your drink until it was finished and sighed. Gojo raised his brow.
“What’s that about?”
“Ask me after my third drink,” you said, calling the waiter over. 
“Drinking away your woes has never worked for you. In fact, I remember when you drank so much you got confused and said that I was kidnapping you.” 
You threw your head in your hands. “That was one time!” Heat started to creep up your face as Gojo recounted all your embarrassing drinking moments. 
“One time? Maybe the kidnapper thing, sure, but then there was the time that you broke down sobbing, and I mean big fat tears rolling down your face, at a deer just crossing the road. You tried to take it home with you.”
You groaned but there was humor in it. You’ve seen the videos of how you act around animals, and Gojo was never too far, oftentimes scooping you up to take you home since you could barely walk. He kept good care of you whenever you went out. 
“Suddenly you think that every animal is the most beautiful creature in the world and you get sad that they don’t know that.” “It’s true. There’s only eight species that can identify themselves in the mirror.” “Of course you know that. Nerd.”
“Shut up,” you laugh. “I’m the nerd while you have an electrical engineering degree?”
“Would geek fit better? You’re the one who becomes a hyper vigilant Snow White when you get drunk, spewing animal and space facts just cause.” 
“I’m not gonna stop drinking and I'm not apologizing. I give you valuable information whether you know it or not,” you shrug. Your next drink was brought to you, and you tried to drink it a little slower through the straw. It didn’t work, as you were suckling on it faster than expected as Gojo caught you up on his personal life. He always amazed you with all the projects he had going on simultaneously. It made your head spin, but you held deep respect for him. For the care free act he put on he was incredibly considerate of those who were younger than him, and always ready to challenge those above him if he thought they were out of line. You envied Satoru’s assertiveness, and when you finally got to your third drink, he asked you what was wrong once again. 
“Just silly relationship stuff. I’ll get over myself soon enough,” you tried to wave him off. Your tolerance was nothing like it was during college, and your words were starting to slow and crash into each other. You nursed the drink close to your chest and Satoru sighed. He pulled it out of your hand, resting the glass on the table while you whined. 
“Toruuuu, stop.”
“Tell me what’s really wrong. You get everybody to talk about their feelings and shit but you want people to overlook yours.” 
“It’s nothing to worry about,” you mumbled.  “I came out tonight to forget about the whole thing.”
On the floor Suguru and Jess swayed in each other’s arms, whispering in each other’s ear and giggling. He looked at her with such adoring eyes, something much deeper than the lust you first saw. Jess was a bubbly mess in his arms but she was enjoying herself. When his back was facing you she gave you an ecstatic look, mouthing a “thank you” that made you smirk. 
You could never get Toji to dance with you. Said it wasn't his thing, and after a couple times of asking and being rejected you dropped the matter altogether. It didn’t make you want to dance any less, it hurts all the same. Gojo saw you looking at all the couples circling around and slid out of the booth. He offered you his hand, and you raised your brow suspiciously. 
“What? You don’t like dancing anymore?”
Gojo wasn’t Toji, and you have never compared them in your mind ever before, but in that moment you had wished that Toji would be a little bit like him. You took Toru’s hand and he took you to the small dance floor, twirling you around to the song. You barely caught the lyrics, but it was a sweet melody about first love. You rested your cheek on Gojo’s chest and he carried the tempo of your dance. 
“Thank you, Satoru,” you muttered, sure that he didn’t hear you. But he did, and he leaned back to look down at you with concerned eyes. 
“I haven't done anything yet. What did your boyfriend do to you?”
Your bottom lip wavered to answer, ready to spill your troubled heart’s concerns when the slow song ended and an upbeat instrumental song started to play. Trumpets were introduced, charging the air with electricity and everybody on the floor started to dance more vigorously. Your face lit up, already forgetting what you were about to say and you twisted and spun around with Gojo, matching the beat, flowing to the rhythm, laughing just as happily as the music sounded. You only went back once to finish off your drink, and you danced until your feet were throbbing. Before Jess left the dancefloor she winked at you and told you that she would be leaving with Surguru, giving you a sly smile. Gojo offered to take you home, and drunkenly you agreed. 
You sang badly to the radio on the drive back to your place, basically yelling songs into Satoru’s ear but he joined in with you, singing right back to you. He matched your energy until you were dissolving into a fit of giggles from singing lyrics entirely backwards. When reached your home Gojo held your heels and bag in his hands while you tiptoed across the stones to get to the front door. 
“Bag please!” 
“Still have manners even when you're drunk,” Gojo laughed. He held your purse open for you to rummage through. You were both looming over the purse and accidentally bumped heads. Gojo’s hand immediately went to rub your forehead instead of his own and you nervously giggled. 
“Careful. You could’ve given me a concussion with that hard head of yours,” he teased.
“Oh fuck you,” you laughed. Your eyes were trapped by his until his lips became the prettier picture. Always pink and plush, you started to drift closer to his face until you finally got some sense. 
 “God Satoru, why did you have to come back now?” You tore your eyes away from his lips and shoved your face in his shoulder. Gojo wasn’t going to stop you from kissing him. He should have if he was a better man. However, he has always wanted to be with you, and you never gave him the chance, so he would’ve taken anything you gave him. Now that he has settled down, he would have been your boyfriend. 
He spoke first to break the silence. “Do you have a headache?” 
“No… I should get my keys now. I’m cold,” you mumbled. 
You couldn’t find your keys in the bag, and you patted yourself down as if you had them in your pockets but you were wearing a very pocketless dress. He could already see the tears forming on your lash line and wanted to soothe you. 
“What if they're at Jess’ place?” Satoru said to calm you down. 
“Why would Jess steal my keys? I thought we were friends?” You were about to start crying. Just then, the front door opened, and Gojo was greeted by a face he never thought he’d see again. 
“Fushiguro?”
“Toji!” 
You jumped in Toji’s arms and he caught you with ease. He came to the front door because of all the noise he was hearing. Never would he had thought that it was Sataru fucking Gojo and his woman bickering outside. 
“Toji I missed you so much. I sent pictures. Did you see them?”
“Yeah. I saw them. You’re gorgeous.” Each word came out with daggers thrown in Gojo's direction.
Toji’s grip on your waist got tighter as you peppered his face with kisses, his stare unbroken from Gojo’s. The first and last target that he wasn’t able to kill all those years ago came back to bite him in the ass. Of course you of all people knew who Gojo was. Gojo looked at the scene like he walked into an alternate universe. You were with Toji. Toji was with you. This was the man that had you moping at the club. 
“Thank you, Sa–Satoru,” you hiccuped. “Don’t be a stranger.”
“You do the same. And let me know if you have any other relationship issues you want to talk about,” he smirked to Toji, and the other man scowled. 
“I told you, it’s nothing,” you said in a sing-song voice. “I’m really sleepy now.”
“I bet you are,” Toji said in your ear. Toji gave Gojo one last look. There was no real emotion on his face anymore. Satoru was only able to thinly veil the annoyance in his voice when Toji dismissed him. “Let’s go to bed.” 
Once inside you led Toji to the bathroom, stripping down naked and stepping straight into the shower. You beckoned him to join you, and he grabbed your shower cap that you forgot so you don’t get your hair wet. Toji took the washcloth from your hands, wanting to wash you himself. This was routine to him, something that made him feel calm. You had the faint smell of alcohol and cigarette smoke lingering on your skin, yet there was still your natural scent of you underneath. He kissed your shoulder, turning you back into the spray of the water, and you peered up at him. You brushed his hair out of his forehead to see him clearly. 
“Did I mention how I missed you?” You giggled. 
“I missed you too, doll.” 
Toji lifted your chin up to look at him. His thumb rubbed the flat surface right below your lip and he kissed you softly once. It wasn’t even a whole day since you were gone and he had missed this feeling more than you could know. The touch of your lips was enough to get him hard, and it was starting to show. 
“I’m never gonna drink again,” you groaned, dropping your head into his chest. “Thank god I don’t have work tomorrow.” “You’re really lucky,” he mumbled. “How do you… who was that guy?” 
You took your washcloth out of his hand and grabbed his own. After lathering it with soap you started to scrub him down, admiring his body in the lowlight.“What guy?” 
“That guy that brought you home,” Toji said through clenched teeth. 
“Toru? He’s just a friend.” 
You even had a nickname for him. 
“Just friends? Since when?” Toji hated the way he sounded. It was needy, prying, totally unlike him. He shouldn’t give a damn, you were back in his arms, going to sleep in his bed. Why couldn’t he just let it go?
“Since uni. We weren’t in the same college but our friend groups overlapped.” 
“That’s it?”
You slowed the way you washed him. The questions started to feel more loaded, and you were sobering up. Your eyebrows were drawn together when you answered. 
“I mean, yeah? I never dated him, if that’s what you’re trying to get at.” 
“I thought you went out with Jess.” Not a question this time, yet the air felt heavier. You were aware of how cold the water was when you usually like to take hot showers. 
“I was with her. She wanted to go to this jazz club and we met up with friends. Jess left with a guy and Toru took me home.” 
“Isn’t he such a great guy,” Toji said through clenched teeth. “So instead of calling me you climbed into some bastard’s car, drunk , at one in the morning.” 
“He’s not just some guy, Toji. I’m sorry, I should’ve called you but I know him.” 
“That’s what you think,” Toji scoffed. 
You scoffed right back at him, now crossing your arms over your chest. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” 
Toji was getting too emotional. He tried to grab the washcloth out of your hand but you stopped him. You both gave each other hard stares with anger seeping into both of your expressions. Toji already spoke too much, ready to let it go, but you were just getting started. 
“You can’t just move past that. What’s the problem this time?”
Toji rolled his eyes. “You make it sound like I always have a problem.” 
“I wouldn’t know, you never tell me anything,” you fired back. 
“There’s no problem. We’re wasting water.” 
You turned the faucet so the shower stopped then stood your ground. This was a side of you that Toji didn’t see often. The stubborn one, the immovable object against his usually unstoppable force. He would be on the sidelines when this happened, watching you deal with family members or other people outside with this unwavering spirit that wouldn’t back down, but now it was turned on him. 
“There. Water’s not wasting. You want to get something off your chest? Say it.” 
“I just didn’t think I’d have to tell you to call for me if you wanted to come home. I know your phone wasn’t broken because you sent me pictures. I expect you to tell me where you’re going and call me when you want to leave. I think that’s the least you can fucking do,” he said through gritted teeth.
You pinched your eyebrows together. “I was drunk Toji, and it was a quick decision that really doesn’t mean anything.” In the back of your head you knew that you sounded like a hypocrite. What he was asking wasn’t a hard request. In fact, it was the very same thing you had asked of Toji when you first started to date. Toji would just up and disappear for hours. Granted, you could always find him at his dojo or in his garage, but he never told you that. You didn’t want to know every little thing that he was doing but a general “I’m okay” would suffice. You knew this, yet you still couldn’t stop the malice crawling up your throat.
“The least you could do is call me by the right name but I guess we’re both having problems with simple tasks.”
Your words rang in the air for a long while. You wanted to regret them coming out of your mouth but you didn’t. It’s been eating you up since you heard her name. She must’ve been a gorgeous lady with a name like that. You couldn’t find any information on her, and it’s not like Toji kept pictures around, yet Toji’s late wife haunted you. Somebody that you have never met had permanent residence in your head. It made you sick. 
You took things to hell and Toji didn’t push back. He didn’t know how else to comfort you, to convince you that he was in love with you, now, and always has been. Flashes of Toji going to see her grave earlier popped into his mind. Even though he was there, all he could think about was you. Toji thought he couldn’t explain himself that well, so he settled for something else.
“You’re not her and I don’t want you to be .” 
Hot tears ran down your face before you even knew that they were there. Toji cupped your face and used his thumb to wipe away your tears. “I thought I could let go of this. I thought I would be mature enough about this whole situation but I’m not. I can see it in your eyes, Toji,” you sobbed. “It only happened one time but if another slip up like that happened I won’t be able to handle it. I think– I think I need a break.” 
Toji froze. You held his wrists and pried them off of his face, putting them back to his side and wiped your nose with the back of your hands. The cold was starting to settle in his bone, a chill that he was familiar with but alway unprepared for. He waited for you to explain yourself and you sucked in a deep breath. 
“We did this whole thing pretty fast, don’t you think? I mean– it’s just–”
“A break. You want to leave.” 
You tried to clear up the confusion. “I want to have some time to think. That’s all. Stay at my place for a little while. I need to think everything through.” 
“Think what through? So what, I’ve been keeping you hostage? Forcing you to be with me the whole time? Fine, go ahead.” 
Blood was rushing in Toji’s ears; he could barely hear his own voice. He left you behind in the shower stumbling over your own words to calm him down. Take a break. What a stupid fucking concept. If you want to leave, just say that. Why would he hold hope for you to come back to him? 
“Toji, wait. Listen to me!” You hastily wrapped a towel around your body, calling behind him but he was not stopping. 
“You already said everything. Go pack your stuff already. I won’t be holding you back anymore.”
“I didn’t mean it like that–”
“What the hell could you have meant?” He growled. He regretted it the second you shrank away from him. It was never Toji’s intention to make you feel small. He sighed and rubbed his hand down his face. 
“You don’t get to talk to me like that,” you whispered. The glassiness in your eyes was not lost to him. You stomped back into the bathroom, coming out with your toiletries in a basket and putting them on the floor. From the closet you brought out your suitcase you had bought the time you had flown to Malaysia with Toji. You started to open the dressers, throwing your  clothes haphazardly inside. You put on your clothes to ditch the towel and grabbed everything that was yours on top of the dresser. 
“Stop,” Toji said in a low voice. If you genuinely didn’t hear him or ignored him, he couldn’t tell. You continued to move like a whirlwind around the room. 
“Stop. Just stop,” he repeated, grabbing your arm and you reeled away like he was a red hot iron rod. 
“I just wanted you to be better, Toji. That’s all I ever wanted. You’re not the only one who’s dealt with loss, you know? There are steps you can take and you refused them all and I am tired . I love you but clearly that’s not enough anymore. If you love me, let me go.” 
The white in your eyes and the tip of your nose was tinged red. The tiredness that you spoke of physically manifested itself, and Toji saw just how much of a toll it was taking on your body. He didn’t want to hurt you anymore.
“It’s not safe to leave right now. Wait until the morning. Please.”
The “please” was your undoing. Not only was he right, but you also didn’t have your keys. They were still at Jess’ place and getting a ride this early in the morning would be impossible. You gave him a curt nod. 
“You sleep here. I’ll sleep in the living room.” 
You didn’t say anything to him when he left the room. Toji sat on the couch plunged in darkness, listening to you shuffle around in the shared bedroom until the light went out. He sat there until the sun rose from the horizon and he didn’t remember when he actually fell asleep. He didn’t dream of anything. All he knew is that when he finally came to you were gone, your stuff cleared out as much as it could be with a note to throw everything else out.
~*~
Toji’s finger hovered over your name on his phone. He shouldn’t call you. He’s the one who pushed you away, told you to leave if that’s what you wanted to do. But after seeing you tonight for the first time in weeks, at the bar that you used to go to together, with with that white haired fucker you looked happy. You were as gorgeous as always, and Toji could almost taste the lip gloss that you were wearing, knew the exact shade it was as it left a mark on the glass you drank. You hung off Gojo’s body, hooking your arms with his, resting your head on his shoulder, giggling and holding his face the whole night. Toji was sure that neither of you saw him, and watching the both of you felt like he was intruding. Jealousy reared its nasty head on Toji, making his chest tight. He wondered how long you’ve known him for. You never brought Gojo up before, not once, but his past always had a funny way of sneaking up on him. Toji left before he did something reckless. 
He couldn’t be mad at anyone other than himself. Now he sat in his car after spending hours driving around the city to clear his head, time slipping through his fingers. Toji’s phone dimmed, a sign of inactivity from his inability to make a decision. He hasn’t been able to reach you in weeks. Every call went to voicemail, but lately they’ve been ringing through with no answer. You must’ve blocked him, but he’s unblocked now, right? The worst that could happen is that you don’t pick up, again, or he could call and call like he’s been doing and you do pick up, but only to tell him to never speak to you again. It would be deserved, but at least he’ll get to hear your voice one last time. 
“Fuck it,” he muttered, pressing the call button and waits. The first ring goes though, then the second, then the third. “Come on,” he urged. You always have your phone on you. He imagined you sitting down somewhere, just watching his call vibrate your phone. Finally, on the last ring the screen changed, the time starting to show that you had picked up. 
“Hello?” It didn’t sound like you were in the middle of anything, but it was hard to tell. You could’ve been laid right up underneath Gojo for all Toji knows. You didn’t sound angry either. There was surprise in your voice, but nothing else. 
“Hello? Toji, are you alright?” 
He spent so much time analyzing your voice he forgot to actually respond. He cleared his voice before answering. “I’m good. How are you?”
“I’m fine. Tired.”  You shifted, the sound of sheets settling around you and Toji tried to imagine where you were. Hopefully in your own bed with no one else in it. “Is– Is everything okay? Did something happen?”
“Nothing happened. Megumi’s okay too,” he said before you could ask. “I just wanted to hear your voice.”
 It was a truthful admission, even if it stirred from jealousy. Nothing could be heard from your line besides your soft breathing. Toji’s finger impatiently tapped on the steering wheel. Usually when he says that he likes the sound of your voice you would turn your face away from him to hide the lopsided grin that would grow on your face. He wondered if you were fighting back the same reaction now. 
“Oh,” is all you said. Oh . Oh well? Oh no? Oh what?  
“I’m going to come over. Is that alright?” 
“Right now?”
“Yes. Now.”
“Why?” 
Toji already started to drive in your direction. He needed to have more than just your voice. He didn’t want to end things with you like this. He didn’t want it to end at all. 
“What, are you busy or something? Got somebody over there?”
“No. I just wasn’t expecting a visit so soon. And I’m surprised that you even asked. Usually you just show up at my place like it's yours too,” you laughed. Music to his ears, that what your laugh was to him. 
“I thought I would use those manners you’re always talking about. I’ll be there in twenty.” 
You sighed heavily. “Bab– Toji. I don’t think this is a good–”
“I just want to talk.” 
“Just talk?” 
“If that’s what you want.” 
“Don’t flip this on me. I tried talking to you and that didn’t work. It never does. I’m not sure if I should even let you in.” There it was. The hardness in your voice that had finality like you were truly done with him. 
“I’m not gonna force you to.” There was nothing left he could say that he thought would convince you. You hated being told what to do, so this was Toji’s last chance to give you the final say. If you told him no, he would turn his car around and lick his wounds later. Explaining to Megumi what happened between the two of you would be a pain in the ass, and getting used to you not being by his side would be hard to get over, but he could do it… at least he thought so. He would try his hardest to avoid that outcome. 
“Fine. See you in twenty minutes. To talk ,” you acquiesced. 
“Right. See you.”
 He was one lucky son of a bitch. 
Toji might’ve been speeding since he made it to your apartment in 10 minutes instead. It’s been months since he’s been in there, the last time being when he helped you pack up a few boxes to put in his house. When he climbed up to your floor and knocked on your door, you cracked the entrance open to look at him. You didn’t open the door all the way, instead using your body to block the rest of your space. 
“Aren’t you going to let me in? You said that I could come,” he said. 
You rubbed your forehead. “Yeah, I guess I did.” 
You looked exactly how he imagined. A satin bonnet covering your head, a big, loose t-shirt from an old rock band, bare legs, and fuzzy socks. It was your nighttime uniform that he’s seen a thousand times before. He just wished it was his shirt instead. “Want anything to drink?” 
You . “No,” Toji grunted, following into your space and closing the door. 
Your apartment looked like you had never left. It’s like he didn’t even make a dent in your life like you did his. You walked over to the kitchen, pulling out some health drink you were obsessed with. He bought that exact flavor when he saw it at the store just to see if it had grown on him. It didn’t, but he drank it down. He stared at your fingers and hands, then your neck as the liquid moved through you. His favorite place to leave a mark on your skin was bare. 
“Aren’t you gonna say something?” You questioned after licking your lips clean. Toji cleared his throat. 
“I’m going to therapy now,” he announced with no preamble. Your eyebrows raised up in an instant. You had no idea what he was going to say, but it definitely wasn’t this.
“Th–that’s good. Really good, Toji. How is it going?”
 “It’s not the condescending bullshit I thought it was going to be.”
You gave him a small smile. “So it's not that bad. I’m really proud of you. I could’ve recommended it till I was blue in the face but actually going and being consistent is where all the hard work lies.” 
“It’s not that hard. Should’ve gone sooner.” Toji cuffed the back of his neck that was heating up from your praise. He couldn’t even look at your face, instead focusing on your fuzzy socks moving around. “I didn’t know how much I was bottling up.” 
You reached for his hand to hold it. It was a simple gesture, something that you have done a million times before, yet Toji’s heart hammered in his chest like it wanted to jump out. “I’m glad you're having a great experience. I mean it. I also went back to therapy myself to work some things out internally.” 
You tried to return your hand back to your side but Toji wrapped around your wrist, pulling you till you laid flush on his body and you used your other hand to prop yourself up on his chest. Your legs slotted between his and he trapped you there, holding you tighter. 
“Toji,” you gasped. Your nose was full of him, you were so close you could count his lashes. He was too close, too soon, but you didn’t push him away. 
“You’ve always been better when it comes to voicing your emotions. You’re perfect.”
“You are the only person in the world that thinks that,” you laughed. “I was a major hothead before we met.” Your giggles died out when Toji’s lips ghosted over yours. It made your lips twitch with how near he was with no contact. 
“Toji… You came to just talk, remember?”
“Tell me how proud you of me are again, ” he stated unashamedly. You sucked a sharp breath in when his free hand slipped under your t-shirt, starting at the middle of your thigh, grazing up to your waist. Warm hands that could lull you to sleep now set your body ablaze. You should’ve told him to stop when  his fingers went south, brushing past your pubic hair before dipping into your sex. You should’ve told him to stop when he used two fingers to stretch you out, hissing at how tight you because you haven't done it in a while. Hell, you should’ve told him no when he called you to come over because you knew how it would end up. Instead you locked lips with him, hiking your leg up to his waist so he had better access, giving him the praise he wanted to hear. 
“I’m proud of you,” you whispered in his ear before licking the shell of it. You combed his nape and started to grind into his hand, using his palm to rub on your swollen clit while he curled around the spot that made you bend to him. 
“You’re doing so well Toji, just like that.” 
“Fuck,” he groaned. He wanted to taste you, he wanted to fuck you. You already had that glazed look in your eyes, about to reach your climax soon. Tonight you were extremely sensitive, shivering to every touch, gripping him like a vice. His fingers were drenched, and when he put his thumb over the silky mess covering your clit you tipped over the edge, your legs shaking so hard he held you up under your knee to keep you from falling over. 
You only caught your breath for a moment before you went to his pants, fumbling over his belt and pulling him out of pants. Toji pressed you up against the nearest wall, giving you just enough time to throw your shirt off before he smashed his lips on yours. You cupped his face, afraid that he would pull away as he lined himself up with your entrance. Breathy moans filled the quiet apartment when he finally fit himself inside of you. Toji has missed this feeling of you around him more than he had thought. No amount of jerking off with a clothing article of yours that you left behind would have satisfied him. The sounds that you made, the soft gasps and mewling couldn’t be replicated. He fucked you up the wall, holding one of your legs up so he could snap into you over and over again, the toes of your second leg barely touching the floor anymore. 
“Faster, faster,” you begged. You hugged around his neck tightly, and when you pulled away to look at him you were met with his pupils dilated. There was a rosy flush on his cheeks that was lovely to see. You were worried that if you saw Toji again he would not be interested in you anymore. It has never felt so good to be so wrong. You brushed his hair out of his eyes to look at him more clearly and traced his lips with your thumb. Pushing your thumb past his lips, you ran it over his bottom teeth and he held it gently with the top one. You pulled your thumb out, then used your index and middle finger to push down on his tongue, watching the pink muscle move around in his mouth. He did well without gagging, and for that you murmured a “good boy” to him. All the blood in Toji’s body went straight to his dick after hearing those words. If he went any harder he would’ve broken through the wall. 
“Open your mouth,” you ordered. You really didn’t need to, as your fingers were still down his throat but you took them out slightly so he could widen his lips. You spat in his mouth and closed it immediately with a harsh kiss, your teeth bumping each other. You hugged him tightly once once, wrapping your arms around the top of his shoulders and tried your best to match his strokes in the position. Never have you been fucked on a vertical surface, and for a fleeting moment you felt bad for your next door neighbor. Toji’s teeth teasing the skin on your collarbone quickly made it a secondary thought. 
“I’m gonna come,” you warned. “Come with me?” 
Toji nodded, his nose bumping yours. The place where you were connected was a mess, your essence staining the front of his pants. The tinkle of his belt loop added a musical quality to the claps of your bodies meeting each other. 
Just like you had hoped you came at the same time. Soft yet heavy pants replaced the other sounds crescendo you just made. You could feel Toji softening inside of you, and he slowly slid himself out of your cunt with a sigh that you second. There was no way for him or you to comfortably stay connected while standing up, fucking was already hard enough. You cupped your sex, catching the come that was starting to drip out of you when Toji brought damp paper towels to clean you up. You wanted to collapse on the floor at the end of it. 
Toji carried you to your couch per your request. You admitted that you still had some of his clothes, and there were his sweats in your closet if he wanted to change his pants when he put you down. You laid on your stomach, stretching your legs as far out as you can, praying that you wouldn’t catch a cramp. When you gained some feeling in your legs that wasn’t static you took a peek at Toji when he walked back in. He was staring down at you, waiting for your reaction. He wasn’t a fool that would believe that sex would fix everything, but it wouldn’t hurt if it reconciled something between the two of you. 
“I want to preface this by saying I do not regret what we did,” you started. You wanted to address the elephant in the room before it crushed you. Toji got down on one knee to be at your level when you spoke and you smiled. Unknowingly he was such a gentleman but he didn’t see himself that way. 
“I don’t regret it either,” Toji agreed. If it was up to him he’d fuck you again and stay the night. He knew that would be asking for too much but a man can dream. 
“Right… but I don’t think we should get back together. Not yet.” You nervously bit your lip. You dared a glance at him and his face was unreadable. 
“We’re working on ourselves, trying to get better. I really do think we’re benefitting from the intimate time apart. I swear I’m not trying to be an asshole when I say this, but I think we should be friends first.”
Toji was silent for a few minutes. You were so worried that you poked his arm to get some kind of response. “I still get to see you?”
“Yes,” said slowly, as if you were afraid he would change his mind suddenly.
“And we can eat meals together?”
“I don’t see why not.” 
“Are you still going to drag me to see movies during the daytime?”
You scoffed. “It’s cheaper and has less people!” 
Toji gave you a shy grin. It slowly melted off of his face, making you ask what’s wrong. 
“You’re not in love with me anymore.” 
You sat up from the couch, putting your hand over Toji’s that rested on the brown leather. It wasn’t a simple answer. The love you had for Toji could not be given to anybody else. You only had room for him in your heart. Trying to pretend that you didn’t, moving on before you were ready backfired, and Gojo got the worst of it. Not that Toji needed to know, but when Toru kissed you, you realized that you never had romantic feelings for him. All you could think about was what Toji was doing, but you were the one who left. It was unfair to Gojo. 
“I still love you, and I do think we can make this work if we do it the right way. We are in fragile states right now, and if we mix a relationship in it we might blow up like we did before. What I'm saying is; let’s take this slow. There’s no rush, right?”
“You’re right.” You were asking for a fresh start and Toji could do that. You were trying so hard for him, and he was willing to do the same. He would earn you back eventually. However long it takes.
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Thank you so so so much for reading!! Any interactions are appreciated!!
Part One
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marnikula · 2 days
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Can u do early seasons spencer x reader who has a lot of problems and they let people walk all over them and they dont set boundaries and they struggle with their emotions. Reader likes spencer a lot but doesn't seek him out bc they feel like he deserves better! And u can decide what happens but make it happy ending :)
Oh my word, I literally spent like 2 hours writing this because I wrote something and then my internet cut out when I posted and now it's lost, so I had to rewrite it. Hope you enjoy!
Cw: gn reader, people dumping work on reader, Spencer being cute
Enjoy!
You were a doormat. You knew it, your friends knew it, everyone knew it. You tried to set boundaries, to say no, but it never seemed to stick. Saying no made you feel guilty, it made you feel like a bad person even though you knew you weren't.
Being a doormat, people tended to walk all over you, requesting ridiculous things of you. That is how it came to be that you were sitting alone in the bullpen, the clock ticking away, showing you that it was around midnight and you still had a whole stack of papers to go through. You felt yourself about to fall asleep, and truly, you were too tired to fight it off when a ding signaled the arrival of someone.
Without even turning to look who it was you knew it was Spencer Reid. You recognized his footsteps, and even if you didn't, the smell he brought with him would have alerted you. It was the smell of coffee mixed sweet undertones, almost as if he had spent his whole day in a café. It was intoxicating. "What are you still doing here?" "Working, I have a lot of stuff to finish before tomorrow" "you mean today" looking back at the clock you could see he was right, it was now officially the next day.
"Do you need some help?" without even waiting for you to decline Spencer took half of the pile you were working on. He moved fast, knowing you well enough to know that you hated asking for help, especially from him, he just could never figure out why.
"Spencer, you really don't need to, I've got this" reaching your hands to take the files back only to be swatted away by the doctor was something you did not expect. "I'm not saying you don't have it, I'm just going to help you so you can go home earlier"
Sighing you admitted defeat and went to go make coffee for the two of you. With Spencer's help you managed to make it through the massive stack of papers on your desk in less that an hour, something you would never have been able to do on your own.
"You, doctor Spencer Reid, are amazing, what can I do to thank you?" it was a slight tease on your part. You didn't expect him to ask you anything return, it wasn't like him, he was too nice . That was one of the things you loved about him, and one of the reasons you willed the crush growing in your heart to shrivel up and die. He deserved so much better than you. Someone with a mind as amazing as his own, someone with kindness rivaling his and someone who knew how to say no. You were none of those. At least not in your own eyes.
"You could go on a date with me" Spencer surprised himself with those words, he really hadn't meant to say them out loud, but he really liked you, and in a moment of confidence inspired by sleep deprevation, he decided to take a chance.
"Really? You mean it?" the both of you were blushing hard at this point, him thinking about how he could have possibly screwed this up and you thinking about how this could possibly get any better.
"I-I mean, only if you want to, you really don't have to feel pressured, I know I said I would take it as paiment, but honestly spending time with you was enough of a payme-" grabbing his face in your hands you turned him to look at you, shutting off his ramblings with the movement and shutting off his brain with your words
"I would love to"
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lnlightning81 · 23 hours
Text
Quiet Dates - Part Five [OB38]
Series : Younger Sister
Summary: Ollie takes you on that first date because he won the bet. Takes you to a small cafe so your anxiety doesn't get the best of you and you can enjoy it
Pairing/s: Oliver Bearman x Norris!Reader, Lando Norris x Sister!Reader
Word Count: 1.7k
Masterlist Oliver Bearman Masterlist Lando Norris Masterlist Younger Sister Masterlist Tag List
Previous
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Standing in the hotel room, Lando was out visiting Carlos and making sure that he was okay. Normal boyfriend duties as you liked to annoy him about. Hungary was fairly warm, so you had decided on a nice outfit that would keep you cool but still allow you to be comfortable in what you were wearing at the same time. 
There was a knock on the door, so you got up from the bed and wandered over to it. Opening the door to see Ollie with a smile on his face wearing a t-shirt and a pair of shorts. 
“Hey” You smiled, opening the door further to let him into the hotel room. Ollie was silent as he followed you back into the hotel room. You turned to look at him as you grabbed your handbag and phone 
“Hey you okay?” You asked him with a frown as you walked over to him. 
“Huh? Yeah, sorry. You just look really good” He smiled, and you blushed, glancing down to the ground before looking up at him 
“You also look very good” You smiled, taking his hand in your own. Ollie blushed as he looked down at you. 
“Thanks. I found a nice little cafe it was really empty when I went past it, and I figured that you’d quite like it” He smiled, and you nodded 
“Sounds perfect” You smiled, walking out of the hotel room with him. 
Walking to the cafe was nice and calm. Ollie made sure that he was holding your hand the whole way there to help ease your nerves as you walked, which you were so thankful for. You hadn’t known each other in person for a long time, but you had been talking over text for ages, which meant you both knew more about each other than you thought. 
You looked up at the little cafe Ollie had found. It looked like a small family fun business that had pictures of the family history dotted around the cafe. Taking you inside, Ollie found a table for you both sitting opposite each other with a smile. 
“So how's the race treating you?” Ollie asked as you looked about the cafe taking in the decor. 
“They’re good. I’m quite enjoying them. Still not so comfortable about trending on social media every time I breathe. but it’s okay. I’m getting used to it. Comes with the job. Although teenage boys and girls who find out you’re hanging out with Formula One drivers aren’t the best. They’ve been blowing my phone up” You chuckled, and he nodded
“Oh I get that. The number of people I’ve had in my text messages from before I left school this weekend is crazy” He laughed, and you nodded, looking at the menu 
“So I believe it’s my turn to pay” You hummed, and he shook his head 
“Got to beat me to it” He hummed, and you rolled your eyes 
“You know I will. You might have the reaction speed, but I’ve got older siblings” You hummed, giving your order to the waitress. Ollie did the same, ordering some tea and a slice of cake 
“Don’t tell my trainer” He joked, and you nodded 
“I don’t even know who your trainer is” You shrugged, and he laughed, holding your hand across the table 
“So I know you probably don’t want anyone to ask you this, but how are you feeling about tomorrow?” You asked, tilting your head slightly to look at him
“I’m scared. More than scared, actually. Formula One is so much different to Formula Two. It’s faster, the cars are different, a lot more g-force, more g-force in crashes. There’s so much that could go wrong” He ran a hand down his face as you gently squeezed his hand. 
“Ollie you’re going to do great. Look at how amazing you did today! I know it was probably a stupid question, and I’ve just made you even more anxious than before, but honestly, I know you’re going to do great. I know you are, and remember we’ve got a deal you need to keep” You hummed, and he smiled at you taking a drink of his tea
“Have you met Charles’ puppy yet?” Ollie asked, changing the subject 
“He’s got a puppy?” You asked now, very excited. Ollie nodded 
“Here let me show you” Ollie showed you a little picture of the puppy
“He’s a little dachshund” You smiled, looking at the picture 
“I can see. He’s very cute. Is he here?” You asked, and Ollie nodded
“Yeah. I’ll let you meet him tomorrow. He wasn’t at quali” You smiled eating a bit of your cake. 
“Want to go for a walk?” Ollie asked once you had both finished your drinks and food.
“Oh that sounds like a good idea” You smiled, getting up and walking to pay. Ollie tried to push you out the way so he could get there first and pay 
“Oh come on, Ollie. You paid for the ice creams” You whined as he paid for the drinks and food. Oliver took your hand as you walked around the park that was next to the cafe. Your energy picked up as you spotted a play park.
 Dropping Ollie’s hand, you skipped over, getting on the swings and starting to swing. Ollie laughed, following behind you in just a walk as you waved him over to come on the swings with you. 
“You have so much energy” He chuckled while getting on the swing next to you. 
“It’s a Norris thing. Actually no it’s not. It’s a Lando and Y/N thing. None of our other siblings have this much energy” You shrugged, enjoying yourself. 
“That’s probably true” He laughed as you tried to get higher than him on the swing, except he was able to get higher faster 
“Oh come on. I just want to go higher” You huffed, and he chuckled, getting off the swing and giving you a push. Your giggles make him smile even more than he already was. 
Getting off the swing, your arms instantly wrapped around him as you regained your balance. Ollie pressed a kiss to your temple before you looked up at him with a smile 
“I want to change our deal” You hummed, and he frowned, looking down at you 
“What why?” He asked, confused, trying to read your face 
“If you finish the race tomorrow, then I’ll go on another date with you. However, I don’t want our relationship to spawn out of a bet for your first ever formula one race. I want that to happen whenever we want that to happen” You explained gently, resting your chin on his chest as his arms wrapped around your waist
“What if I want that to happen tonight?” He asked 
“I think I’d like that” You smiled up at him as he leaned down a little. Your faces hovering above each other 
“Can I kiss you?” Oliver asked, and you nodded 
“I think I’d like that too” You whispered as he leaned down. 
Your lips pressed together gently as you wrapped your arms around his neck. He pulled you closer by your waist. You smiled into the kiss, relaxing in his arms as you kissed him. Pulling back after a little while. You rested your head against his chest as you looked up at him 
“Was that okay?” He asked, causing you to nod 
“It definitely was. Although you’ve stolen all my energy now” You joked, and he laughed 
“Good. It means you’ll stop texting me at two in the morning” you smiled up at him as he wrapped his arms around your shoulders, pulling you into his body as he started walking with you again. Looking at your phone, Lando had texted to say that he was back in the hotel room now and not to wake him. 
“We both know that I’ll be tired until I get into bed and then I’ll be jumping on Lando again” Ollie laughed as you pulled a hair tie off your wrist and pulled your hair out of your face. 
“I know my dads here, and he’ll be in the garage tomorrow, but I’d really appreciate it if you would be in the Ferrari garage tomorrow. You’ve got this great way of calming me down” You smiled, looking up at him 
“You know I’ll be there if you want me there. Lando really won’t care” You hummed, and he nodded, stopping as you passed a fountain. You looked at him with a frown as he looked down at you with a smile on his face 
“Make a wish” He hummed, and you turned to the fountain and made a wish before starting to walk back to the hotel. Walking you up to the hotel room stopping outside of your room with Ollie, who smiled at you 
“Thank you for coming out with me” He smiled 
“Of course. I really enjoyed it, Ollie. Thank you” You smiled, opening the hotel door up after giving Ollie another hug and pressing a kiss to his cheek. Walking into the hotel room silently, assuming that Lando would be asleep by now. you let out a scream when you saw Lando sat staring at you 
“Jesus fuck Lando” You swore hand going to your chest as Lando laughed at you. There was a knock at the door 
“Y/N?” Ollie called, and you opened up the door to see a worried looking Oliver Bearman. 
“I heard you scream. Are you okay?” He asked, looking to check you for any injuries 
“Yeah. Just got a heart attack from my lovely brother. He told me he’d be sleeping, but he was sat staring at me” You explained as Lando was still laughing in the background 
“Oh good. I’m gonna go back to my room then” he smiled 
“Night Ollie” Shutting the door again, you turned back to Lando, rolling your eyes as you sat on your bed, taking your shoes off 
“How was your date?” Lando asked, raising his eyebrows as he turned in his seat 
“It was good. We went to a little cafe then walked around the park. I got a little too excited when I saw some swings” Lando laughed 
“So you admit it was a date?” He asked, and you rolled your eyes again 
“Yeah. I admit it” You grabbed your clothes walking into the bathroom as Lando cheered obviously very happy with the outcome.
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wosoamazing · 2 days
Text
Leah's Return
Part 6 - Fire on Fire Series
A/N: Sorry this one is short, updates may not be as regular in the next few weeks bc Uni is getting a little hectic... (I know I posted one yesterday but I don't know if I 100% like this so I'm just getting it out)
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The game today was the one Leah expected to be making her return, it also was the game your parents had decided to come to. There was some irony in that, as your parents were most likely going to ruin a night that was meant to be fun and celebrate the return of Leah. However you ignored the fact they were there, not even looking for them in the stands before the game started.
At 61 minutes Leah was subbed on and the reception was great. The game finished amazingly with Arsenal beating Reading 6-0.
-
As soon as the whistle blew you ran up to Leah and hugged her.
“You did amazing! I’m so proud of you,” you told her as you patted her on her back, “I have to go speak to them now, but I will see you later,” she nodded as said something along the lines of thank you and good luck before you walked off.
You quickly found your parents in the stands and walked up to them.
“Look at you two playing the supportive parent role”, you said as you greeted them, seeing how they had brand new Arsenal Jerseys on which had your number on them, and to top it all off they had Mum and Dad written across the back.
“Y/N, respect please,” You Dad beckoned,
“I’ll decide how I treat you when you tell me the real reason your here,” you pointedly said
“Can we go somewhere else?” He asked.
 “No we are doing this here,” “Well, your father and I are giving you one last chance before we cut you off, you can decide, but there won’t be anymore chances, we will buy you whatever house, wherever you want, and we will pay for all your expenses whilst you study, all you need to do is quit.” 
“No,” you reply, looking at her dead in the face.
“No?” They both questioned, expecting you to put up a fight. 
“No, I’m not giving up the thing I love. Just to fulfil your wishes and your distorted reality. You didn’t raise me anyway so you cutting me off won't do much harm,” you walked off, and made your way into the locker room, quickly having a shower before you jumped in your car and headed home, to start getting ready for tonight, at least tonight you could drink and forget about it all.
_____
It was later that night and your plan to drink and forget it all had definitely not worked, you hadn’t actually drunk at all, knowing all too well it wasn’t the best idea at all to drown your sorrows but you also felt like shit. You couldn’t believe they came all the way just to cut you off, clearly having no respect for the date that was steadily approaching in two days. You just wanted to go home, however as you were meant to be going home with Leah you didn’t know if that was an option, as this was her night and she should have fun, however as you looked around the bar you noticed Beth and Viv together, so you decided to ask them if they could take you home.
“Can you take me home? I know it’s really early, but I’m just not feeling the best and I don’t want to make Leah leave early.” “Of course, we were thinking of heading off now anyway,” Viv told you and Beth rolled her eyes.
You were sitting in the back seat head resting against the window, when Beth asked if you were okay, and you mumbled a small ‘yeah’ before small soft tears started to roll down your cheeks.
Both women followed you into your home but you didn't question it, you were honestly expecting it, however you just ignored them and walked into your room.
You were scrolling on tik tok when the fifth edit of your parents and you from the game showed up on your screen, with the caption saying how supportive your parents were. Before you could even think you flung your phone out of your hand and it hit the wall
You threw your phone across the room as hot angry tears started to flow down your face.
“Hey, what's going on?” Beth asked as she opened the door, “are you okay?”
“No, but that doesn’t matter, sorry if I scared you, I threw my phone, I didn’t want to see another edit or post of me and them from tonight. People are saying they are supportive, but they aren’t, and I mean I did have my aunts but it’s still different. Knowing your parents are literally throwing millions of dollars at you so that you do what they want. Knowing they disapprove of what you do so much that they would do that. It’s fucked, and it’s fucking unfair,” you took a deep breath before more tears started to stream down your face, “I’m sorry.”
“It is unfair. It is a fucked up situation and you have nothing to be sorry about,” Beth said as she walked up to you, and wrapped her arms around you. You practically collapsed into her, needing any form of comfort. “Should we call Stina?” She questioned
“No,” you had called Stina enough over the past few years, tonight was date night and you weren’t going to interrupt her night, “oh you can go if you want,” you said as you tried to pull out of her arms, getting the sense that she didn’t want to stay.
“No, that's not what I meant. I just didn't know if you would want your best friend or not?”
“No, it's okay, and you're one of my best friends now too,” you admitted, shortly after hearing a sniffle, looking up to see some tears had fallen from Beth’s eyes.
“You’re a fat softy you know that, right?” you told her before pulling her in for a massive hug.
You spent the rest of the evening on the couch with Beth and Viv watching a movie.
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moonstruckme · 7 hours
Note
For have a bonfire 🌺
James Potter + angst (comfort at the end) + reader who keeps up this perfectionist persona but James accidentally sees them break down :(
(I'm in dire need of comfort angst it's actually not even funny anymore)
Thanks for requesting!
James Potter x fem!reader ♡ 1k words
James doesn’t know what he’s doing, following you like this. It’s creepy, probably, but there’s just something about your demeanor today that’s not sitting right with him. 
Your party’s great. You’ve made fun drinks and more snacking foods than anyone can eat, been migrating from group to group to make sure everyone is introduced and comfortable, struck that delicate balance in temperature so that Remus isn’t too warm but Sirius isn’t too cold, you’re the perfect hostess. But there’s something about you, in you, that feels off to him. 
You pass the bathroom, going into your room and shutting the door behind you. You want to be alone, clearly. James should respect that. 
He knocks softly so as not to startle you. Waits a few moments, then says your name. 
“Yeah?” There it is again, that wrongness. It’s your voice, and yet it doesn’t sound entirely like you. “Is everything okay?” 
Is it? he wonders. “Yeah,” he says, “can I come in?” 
“Do you need something?” You sound embarrassed to be asking. It’s not really in your nature to deny anyone anything. “I’ll be out in a minute.” 
James should go. He should, but his blood is thrumming in his fingertips. He asks, “Are you okay?” 
Silence from the other side of the door. 
He tries the handle. It moves. “Hey, I’m coming in, alright? Shout if you’re naked or something.” 
When the quiet persists, he opens the door. You’re slumped on your bed, fingertips pressing harshly into your face and your eyes pinched shut. The air in James’ lungs goes stale. 
You open your eyes to look at him, and they’re wet, not quite red but getting there. You say in a hushed voice, “I’m so sorry.” 
“It’s alright,” James says automatically, closing the door softly behind him. Then, “What do you have to be sorry for? Are you okay?” 
“I’m fine.” You give him a watery smile, waving a hand like this state he’s found you in is irrelevant. Laughable. “I don’t mean to take you away from things.” 
“You’re not, angel.” James crosses the distance to you slowly, giving you time to signal for him to stop. When you don’t he eases onto the bed beside you. The mattress dips, making his hip slide until it’s touching yours. “I wanted to come see you. What’s wrong?” 
“Nothing.” You try to laugh, but twin tears escape from the corners of your eyes, undermining the effort. You catch them before they can get far. “Do you think everyone is having a good time?” 
Your voice nearly cracks on the last word, and James’ heart completes the act. 
“Oh, sweetheart,” he murmurs. You squeeze your eyes shut as if his caring stings. “Can I hug you?” 
Your nod is mute and stiff enough that James doesn’t fully trust you mean it. He wraps his arms around you tentatively, only pulling you to his chest when you turn into him, letting your face wet his neck. 
“Everyone’s having a great time,” he answers honestly, thumb sweeping over your shoulder. “If you’re not, though, we can go home. You don’t have to do all this if you’re not feeling up to it.” 
“No,” you say thickly, worming a hand between you to rub cruelly at your eyes. “No, I don’t want to be a nuisance.” 
“You wouldn’t be.” James holds you closer, his body obeying some futile wish to protect you from whatever makes you think things like that. Your face is warm against his shoulder, the slow dampness seeping into his collar evidence that your upset hasn’t dissipated. “It’s your party, you shouldn’t need to cater to everyone when you’re not even getting to enjoy it yourself. We’re being nuisances to you, really.” 
“No you’re not.” Your rebuttal comes quick and ardent, a knee-jerk reaction. You ease away from James’ chest, wiping under your nose. He lets his arms fall to your waist but keeps you in their circle. “You’re my friends, you could never be nuisances to me.” 
He smiles. “You seem to be catching on.” 
Your expression remains solemn. Guilty. “I just feel like…” Your gaze flees downward. James doesn’t give chase, letting you have what space you can. “I think that if I’m not being useful, I’d probably be more trouble than I’m worth. Maybe more of a nuisance than people think.” 
For a second, James can only look at you, any placations or assurances drying up on his tongue. Despite your best efforts, your upset has left little pools of makeup underneath your eyes, and your shoulders are hunched inward like you want to hide this part of yourself. Which you do, obviously. If James hadn’t pried his way in here you would have had your cry in private, probably rejoined the party with a pasted-on smile, back in your role as the perfect hostess and ready to please everyone again. He wonders how many times it’s happened. 
All day James has been thinking you’re not yourself, but maybe he was putting that pressure on you too, to be the self that made things easy for everyone. Put-together, palatable. Perfect. 
“You think we care how useful you are?” he asks, smoothing a hand up your side to cup your neck. He doesn’t force you to turn your face up to his, but you’re amenable to it, following the motion of his thumb on your jaw. “You’re our friend, too. We care about you, not what you can do for us.” 
Your face pinches and then crumples, and James pulls you into his chest again, making half-desperate shushing sounds while he pats your back. 
“Sorry,” you squeak. “I’m trying not to—” 
“Hey, don’t be sorry, angel, okay?” James turns his face into your hair, kissing the side of your head and not letting himself think about what that might mean to either one of you. “You don’t have to do anything. I’ve got you.” The tension seems to slip from your shoulders, and then they’re shaking properly. You wrap your arms around his middle. “It’s okay,” he promises, gathering you closer. “It’s okay, sweetheart, I’ve got you.” 
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thegoldencontracts · 2 days
Note
ONE OF MY TWST OCS IS A TOTAL TSUNDERE WHAT THE HELL
Make twst tsundere content, I DARE you(I'd say I'd match you with content of my own, however it is drama and science finals week and I'd rather not burn myself out on more than one front bc my english final is next week. So I will not guarantee that lmao BUT STILL THAT SOUNDS AWESOME MAKE THAT CONTENT I WILL EAT IT UP)
- thoughtlessdesires
THANK YOU SOMEONE ELSE WHO UNDERSTANDSSSSS
Hello, you there, yes, YOU 🫵 can help make tsundere twst by uhh... idek man it's tsundere twst,,, it's cuteee i swearrr imagine THIS:
I-It's Not Like I Like You!
Summary: The Housewardens deal with their affection in the oddest of ways.
Notes: This is a taste of what we can make possible GUYS tsundere!twst is cute and it's not ridiculously ooc or smth like that i SWEAR- Also the last sentence in Azul's part is literally ripped straight from the third part of his dorm vignette (the tsundere potential of this man is so understated guys PLEASE let me yap here I have a point-)
Night Raven College; a place of raw meritocracy. Sentiment is rarely found, and affection is often mocked. Logic and strength are meant to take priority, and discord between students is common.
So what happens where these students find someone who treats them with kindness, understanding.
...Completely flounder, of course.
The housewardens, during one of their meetings, even discussed the dearest Ramshackle Prefect, so odd, so understanding. Kalim had brought the topic up, of course.
"...Why's this important?" Leona had said, a bored look on his face.
"I-Indeed," Riddle said. "The Prefect isn't particularly relevant to our current topic of discussion, regardless of accomplishments."
Azul sighed in his typical, overdramatic manner of his.
"How cold!" he said. "Kalim was merely doing his duty to discuss the needs of all students, regardless of how-"
His nose wrinkled.
"Talentless."
"Well, the Prefect's not that bad." A lukewarm praise. Even Kalim wasn't speaking highly of the Prefect? Just what was going on here?
"A total normie," Idia had said.
"It's true, the potato could use some work," Vil said,
Wow. These housewardens sure did hate you, didn't they?
Wrong! At that moment, all of the, were lying! They liked you. And no one in that room had any clue how to deal with it.
Riddle hasn't ever really got to experience relationships due to the stifling pressure of his mother. Thus, he has absolutely no clue how to handle the sudden affection for you he feels. He'd often stop by Ramshackle to help you with your homework. Just because you happened to need it way more than the others, of course. N-No ulterior motives here. What do you mean 'his face is red'? You're just imagining things!
Leona's always been treated like a cold, uncaring individual, and that's what he's used to. That leaves him completely flabbergasted when you suddenly start making him lovesick. He happens to "accidentally" drop money and the like while you were near. Not that he wants to help you, of course! He just doesn't really care about the money that much. Why're you looking at him like that? He's not that kind of sap!
Azul's childhood's left him used to rejection. After so long of being mocked for any desire of love and companionship, he's shunned it. Love's just business to him, an easily exploitable emotion. So he'll never be able to admit it now that he's the exploitable one. He gives you stuff... for free? Since when did he do that? Ask him about it and he insists he's just doing it for business' sake. What kind of business? Is he sure he doesn't just like you? W-What sort of foolish questions are those? Do you honestly think him capable of such an illogical sentiment as "attachment"?
Kalim, of course, isn't immune. Even he doesn't understand this. Someone actively returning his kindness? He's absolutely in love, and he doesn't know how to handle it. Although he won't be quite as abrasive as the others, he'll definitely struggle to admit his feelings. He might actually be less nice to you than to others. Not in a rude way, of course, he's just a bit quiet because he's always so flustered around you! Can you blame him?
Vil, too, despite his normal mentality of being candid and mature, struggles to handle his affection. He'll buy you skincare and the like. B-But, he'd do this for anyone, of course. There's nothing particularly special about the way he feels for you! Once again, though he isn't particularly defensive, he'll definitely struggle to admit his feelings, and it causes him boatloads of internal conflict. Why's he being so immature all of a sudden?
Idia doesn't get you. Why'd some normie suddenly have to start talking to him? J-Jeez, it's not like he enjoys your company or anything! Idia can vaguely recognize the word 'tsundere' in his head as he mulls over his interactions with you, but he denies it. Denying his feelings? U-Uh, what feelings?
"Looks like you have some competition, huh?"
"What competition, Lilia?" Malleus's face twisted in displeasure. "The Child Of Man- they're merely a friend."
Malleus doesn't know how to feel. He's never really had these sorts of close relationships before, so when his heart pounds around you and sparks seem to fly, he has no clue what to do. He's so deep in denial, partially due to his obliviousness when it comes to matters of sentiment and partially due to how he's used to being intimidating, and blushing like a schoolgirl around one's crush is the opposite of intimidating.
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its-the-ratdawg · 2 days
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One thing I think about a lot is how in S3, the person who worked the hardest to keep Will away from Hannibal was actually Will. And even he didnt do a good job, but he can honestly say he tried. He tried to have a normal murder free life with a wife and a kid and he tried to stay away from anything that would tempt him to do smthng else. When Jack turned up to ask him for help he said no thank you. He tried to resist his urges both homocidal and homoerotic but he did not have very much support in that at all
He said "I need to see Hannibal" and Jack basically told him "By all means! Go right ahead! Go visit him whenever you want for as long as you want, let him smell you too. Just like old times." He told Molly, "When I come back, I might not be the same." "But I will be 🥺" Girl shut the fuck up hes fighting DEMONS
How hard would it have been for one singular character to say "Hey, this is a bad idea" just ONCE. Jack could have personally supervised Will's visits to Hannibal. Molly could have vetoed his involvement after Will TOLD her it was probably going to be bad for him. Literally any small intervention from someone with actual sway over Will's decisions and there's a small chance he might have listened.
Not that it was anyone's job to prevent Will and Hannibal from disappearing to Europe together for a honeymoon murder tour but you also cannot surprised pikachu face when you did not even do the tiniest low effort thing to prevent it. Especially when you saw it coming miles away. Will and Hannibal more than deserve to enjoy their homoerotic killing spree when every other character knew this could and would happen and did fuck all to stop it
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stinmybubs · 2 days
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"I Want you Pt.2" NSFW
AN: Hi hi!! Thank you all so so much for the love on my last post, this one was planned out a tiny bit more but tbh I just want to skip to the sex at one point sooo Teehee. (I also decided to spell his name with the gou lol.)
18+!! Please Minors DNI! Please and thank you! I’m not too good at drawing sex scenes tbh! So I hope this’ll be okay I’ll practice more!
AFAB! Reader x Bakugou Katsuki
Warnings!!: Degrading!! LONGER THAN PT.1
Pt. 1 here!
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Bakugou was livid. Not only was every other boy in the class able to get a peek at your ass, but you keep purposely putting yourself out there for everyone to see. Of course he didn’t want anyone to look at what he wanted. What was his. But of course, you weren’t his yet though.
Bakugou found the best way to punish you, to tease back. Maybe leave some soft touches on your body here and there, getting you to want him, crave him, and only think of him.
So, as the time passed in the gym he plotted how he was going to go about this without being caught by everyone else. But seems fate had something in store for the two of you, because you could have perfect timing.
“Fuck I need more water…” you groaned, begging for time to go faster. As you grabbed your water bottle your good friend Uraraka waved to you, quickly walking over to you with her beautiful smile on her face.
“Where ya goin? We have like 20 more minutes.” The wide eyed girl asked, curiously looking at you.
“Well, I need more water if I’m gonna survive anymore of this…or I’ll pass the fuck out.” You say, wiping your forehead with your towel as the girl chatted it up with you before letting you go refill your water.
As you make your way out the hall and to the water fountain, you can’t help but think about how sexy Bakugou looked working out. His skin glistening perfectly on his muscles, oh and the way his pecs just looked so perfect, the way he would lift up his shirt from time to time to reveal his abs. Oh god. He was so hot.
You thought about how his rough hands would feel on your body. How’s he would grab you by the waist, he honestly could easily pick you up without and issue. You gulp as you put the water bottle underneath the faucet of the water fountain. Not realizing how you were rubbing your thighs together and your breathing became uneven.
“Whatcha’ thinkin’ of? Hm?”
The voice made your heart sink. Feeling a sudden weight behind you, his hands grabbing the water fountain to trap you in front of him.
“N-nothing… I’m just thinking how long the workout out is!” You pant, your heart racing as he pressed against your back.
“Really? That’s all? Cuz yer sure was showin off a ton back there..” he leaned in to your ear, the feeling of his breath on your neck and ears made you shudder.
“I-…I don’t know what you mean Bakugou.” You try your best to keep yourself together. Oh how you wanted to just melt underneath him and let him take you right then and there.
“Hm…you think I don’t notice? Yer’ little stares? Ya’ pathetic attempts at teasing me?” He puts the thin skin of the tip of your ear between his teeth, nibbling it slightly. You let out a small whimper, omg. It’s finally happening! You shut your eyes prepared anticipating his next move.
Nothing. As hot as his pressure was, you didn’t realize he was gone. What the fuck? Was I imagining or was that real? Am I going crazy over this man? You panic internally realizing how hot your body was. Fuck, i gotta go home. With that you did not care if you all had 20 minutes left on the clock, you were all hot and bothered and needed some relief.
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“Fuck…” you quickly fidget with your keys, trying to get your room door open. “Why isn’t it working?” You hiss, taking the keys out to examen them. Wrong key. You accidentally grabbed the nearest key next to your water bottle instead of your own. The worst part is. It was Bakugou’s keys.
“Oh my god, you got to be kidding me…” your heart began to race, thinking of your last interaction with the guy.
“Oi. You got something that’s mine.” The familiar voice seen shivers up your spine, your heart dropping as you turned around to look at the blonde. “Haha…seems I do” you awkwardly laugh, watching him walk over to you, he had a towel wrapped around his neck with one hand holding one side and behold his other hand. A key.
“And I’m guessing that’s my key?” You point to the key in his hand. He nods, a small smirk entering I face. Oh how handsome he was up close. You couldn’t help but stare at his face, it’s like you were entranced for a moment, watching a bead of sweat drip down his face and off his chin. Oh how you saw his grin grow wider.
“Quite ya’ starin.” He uses his free hand that was once holding his towel to flick your forehead.
“Ow, sorry! Sorry…may I have my key back?” You looked back him, making eye contact for a split second before he made a ‘hm’ noise. His body shifted closer to you, pressing your back against your dorm door. The dangled the key over your head as he leaned one arm against the door.
“Come earn ya’ keys back pretty.” He once again flicked your forehead, grabbing his own keys out your loose hands and walked away.
You were freaking I out. What did he mean? Why did he do that? What the FUCK is going on? So many question filled your flustered head. Omg, omg omg, omg!! Your face burning red.
Katsuki waited patiently in his room, leaning against his own bed, staring at the keys he had in front of him. You were taking fucking forever, all that teasing and no guts to back it up made him snicker.
Knock knock
Finally. Opening the door to see you standing there, your face all flushed red. Cute. He thought, letting you into his dorm, grabbing your keys and throwing them somewhere.
“What took ya’ so long? Fucking thought you pussied out of wanting me.” He grabbed your face, making you look into his eyes. “I uh…was nervous?” You questioningly stated. Your heart racing. His room smelt so good.
"So uh...how do I earn my keys back Bakugou?" You nervously asked as he let your face go, blushing at how big his hands were. The boy hadn't answered you yet, but oh you got your answer when he grabbed your wrist and pulled you close to him.
"B...Bakugou? Why-" you were cut off by Bakugou pressing his lips onto yours, moving the hand that was on your wrist to your waste to pull your body closer to him and the other pressing your head deeper into the kiss.
You were in shock, your eyes wide making eye contact with katsuki. Soon you melted into the kiss, wrapping your arms around his neck. Fuck. You never knew kissing could feel so good, it got hot so fast it felt like the room was on fire. Your kiss with bakugou soon became sloppy as he effortlessly picked you up by the waist, your legs immediately wrapping around his waist as he moved you over to his bed.
Katsuki released himself from the kiss, you let out a small whine because the kiss felt so fucking good you never wanted it to stop. questingly looking up at him, you noticed that devilish smirk on his face. "Wha-AT" You squealed as he tossed you onto his bed.
"What the fuck Bakugou!?" You shout, super confused on what's going on. Trying to sit up you feel your legs being grabbed and pried open by his hands. "W-Wait!" You shout, trying to stop him from removing your shorts.
"I-...I haven't showered yet I might stink." You shyly try to close your legs back up but he was just too strong, keeping them open. "I don't care. And stop calling me Bakugou...ya' know what we're about to do and ya' still keep saying the wrong name. It's Katsuki." He gently slapped your hand away from you trying to remove his hands.
You gulp, completely surrendering yourself to his will, watching as he slowly removed your shorts. you could already feel how wet you were through your own panties and were extremely embarrassed because you knew he was gonna tease you about this.
"Wow...this we for me? Or was it when ya' decided to give the whole class a show hm..? " The feeling of of one of his fingers pressing against your soaked panties, at this point the panties didn't even matter, you felt how he rubbed his fingers against you fold causing you to let out a small moan.
Katsuki couldn't wait any longer, all the teasing and the thoughts he had of you all building up to this moment. Fuck you looked so hot laying on his bed, face all flushed and completely surrendered to him.
Katsuki removed you panties effortlessly, tossing them aside not caring where they landed, fuck. This is really happening. You felt Katsuki’s fingers slowly slip into you, your slick already making wet noises which made you really embarrassed.
Katsuki watched you, he watched as your body convulsed and your face contort as his fingers moved in and out of your pussy.
“K-…Katsu please.” You look at him with pleading eyes, his fingers felt so good, but of course you wanted more. And you knew he wanted more too. “Ya’ want me that bad huh?” He chuckled leaning himself further between your legs, his fingers still doing their job as his face got closer to yours.
“Why should I give a slut like you my dick?” He questioned, you barley able to answer him over the feeling of his thick, touch fingers pounding into your pussy. “C-cuz…please?” You beg, your eyes slightly welling up with tears of desperation. You’ve never felt so hot and needy in your life.
Katsuki hummed at your expression, he could feel his cock throbbing in his pants, his mind being clouded with lust. Finally having you laying in his bed, it felt like a dream.
Katsuki removed his sweatpants and boxers swiftly, ready to feel you. Of course he couldn’t think properly, not even caring to get a condom…not like he had one in the first place, him being a virgin. He was simply acting on instinct and desire.
You try your best to brace yourself, trying to get a peak at his dick. You couldn’t really due to his tank top dropping a bit far where you could only make out a bit of it, and boy was he bigger than you thought he would be.
His dick wasn’t huge, it was the perfect size about 6.5-7 inches and hell was he pretty girthy. This made your anxiety peak a little. Will that hurt? Well the only thing that’s been inside your body until this moment has been your fingers. So yeah pretty sure it’s gonna hurt.
“Look at me.” You heard the blonde boy growl, one of his free hands forcing you to look up at him, making eye contact the whole time he slowly put in his dick.
“Ah..! Katsu-…it hurts!” You hiss in pain, feeling his dick stretch out your walls. He simply groaned, stopping a little bit to make sure you adjust to him. “Fuck.” Katsuki leaned in to kiss you, trying to help distract you from the pain as he slid the rest of his dick inside you.
You moan into his mouth, deepening the kiss as you felt even more pain writhe throughout your body. Soon the pain easing into a more pleasurable feeling. Oh you felt so full.
“Kats..!” You separate the kiss, leaving a string of saliva from one another’s lips. “You can…you can move” you struggle to say. Katsuki didn’t waste anytime, slowly he started moving his hips. He was trying his best to hold himself back, but you were so fucking tight and he just wanted to ravage you.
Slowly his thrusts became faster, leaving you a moaning mess as your vision became a bit blurred. Oh how you didn’t regret teasing Katsuki at all if it all means he wanted you this badly as well.
“Fuck!” Katsuki exclaimed looking back into your blurred eyes, loving how pathetic you looked underneath him. “Ya’ look like a whore.” Katsuki’s comment made you feel something, you never thought you’d like anything like that but his comment turned you on even more.
“Ya’ like that huh? Like being called a fucking whore and slut.” You gulp, nodding your head profusely as he kept fucking your pussy.
“Katsu…please! More!” You beg, you couldn’t help but give up your own will because you just felt so good. “Beggin like a fucking whore…ya’ so fuckin perfect for me.” Bakugou kissed you, a rough and sloppy kiss.
You felt like a fucking pornstar as you stared at the ceiling when he kissed you, feeling closer and closer towards your climax. Fuck…thought I’d last longer. You admitted to yourself.
Immediately you remove yourself from the kiss, letting out pathetic moans, “gonna…cum!~” you shout, wrapping your legs around his waist trying to trap his dick inside you.
“Fuckin cum ya’ slut.” Throwing your head back in pleasure, you could feel your legs violently shake as you finally came. Katsuki stopped, looking at your pathetic state and with a lick of his lips he lifted one of your legs over his shoulders.
“Wh…what…?” You question, barley able lift your head to see what he’s doing.
“I haven’t cum yet…” he gave you his signature smirk.
Oh fuck. You were in for a long night.
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AN: This took me a lot longer to complete than I liked it to. I got stuck at the sex scene because I just forgot how to write it. So I’m trying to practice on smut again! I hope you all enjoyed it I am sick rn so I will proof read this later! Thank you so much for all the love!! Xoxo Stinmybubs.
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wh1msic4alwasab1 · 24 hours
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𝐒𝐢𝐫 ⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩彡
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synopsis: working at your husbands company meant no short skirts <\3
tags: semi-public, vulgar, degredation, rough, spanking, penetration, explicit
wrd cnt: 1.2k
a/n: i need him biblically
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You walked into the office, your high heels clicking on the floor, making it echo throughout the halls. You were late today, but no one would say anything about it. They all knew better than to tell your husband what they thought of you.
You wore a short tight skirt, which was a mistake on your part, but someone had to bring a little fashion into the boring corporate world which was your job, and your husbands business.
"Y/n?" One of the men said, looking at you up and down. "Are you coming from a party or something?" He said, chuckling.
"Nope…why?” You say, too tired this morning to jest anyone.
“Alright well, boss wants you in his office."
"Okay!" You gave a small wave and got up, oblivious as to what he’d need you for.
As you stepped into the room, you noticed that there was only your husband and another one of your colleagues. "I'll leave you two alone then." The man said without another word.
"Ah, y/n. Come sit next to me." Your husband gestured to the seat across from him, his desk.
"Yes, sir." You nodded and moved to sit.
“Sir”, it was a little formal, but it’s what he preferred.
He took your hands in his own, pulling you closer to him as he leaned back against his chair. His eyes never leaving yours. "How’s work so far?"
"Good, sir." You answered truthfully.
"Good, good. And how was dinner last night?" He asked curiously.
"It was great, thank you." You replied honestly this time.
"Great!" He grinned happily at you. "Now, tell me about these new clothes you bought for yourself."
"Oh, they're really nice." You blushed a bit at his question. "They fit me perfectly too."
“Oh yeah? They definitely turn some heads huh.” Do you know why?” He said, slowly getting up to hover over you as you sat atop his desk. So close you could feel his breathe across your cheek. His demeanor had completely changed.
You nodded your head, getting nervous as to what he was going to say.
He placed his hand on your thighs, squeezing them slightly before smacking them.
“Because everyone’s so curious as to why you look like a whore in my office.” He whispered, his eyes piercings yours. “Everyone wants to fuck you, you know that right?” His voice was low and raspy. It sent shivers through your body.
You shook your head, trying to deny it, but you couldn’t lie. You did look like a whore in his office. Everyone wanted to fuck you, didn’t they?
His hand left your thigh, moving up your skirt to grip your waist tightly. He pulled you towards him, his lips brushing against yours as he spoke once more. "Tell me, y/n. Do you want to be fucked by every single person who walks into this building? Or are you just trying to embarrass me on purpose?"
You nodded, unable to speak any words. All you could do was nod no’s as he gripped your body tighter.
“Or you want me to fuck you that badly? Let everyone hear? Hm?” He said, pinning your wrists behind your back, his body pressing against yours. “If I take off that tight top, would you let them all see those beautiful breasts of yours?”
“No-no!” You whimpered out, tears forming in your eyes.
“You want to deny it?” He growled, pushing himself further into you. “Is this what you want? To get punished by me?”
“Please...please stop,” You cried out, tears rolling down your face as he continued to push himself inside you.
"Then tell me the truth." His voice was deep and commanding as he thrusted deeper into you.
"I...I don't know." You whimpered, your body trembling under his touch.
"What do you mean you don't know?" He growled, his grip tightening around your wrists.
"I...I..." You stammered, unsure of how to answer his question.
"Answer me, y/n. What do you want?" He demanded, his voice harsh and demanding as he thrusted harder into you.
"I...I want you to punish me," You finally admitted, your voice barely audible as you spoke.
That’s all he needed to hear, all he needed to turn you right around and bend you over just enough and your skirt slid right up by itself; your ass spilling out and revealing the cutest thong too. You heard a snap as it hit your ass, along with a deep chuckle from your husband.
“tch- such a fucking whore.” He said, unzipping your pants and pulling his belt out.
"Spread your legs, slut." He commanded, and you obeyed immediately.
You spread your legs wider, giving him access to your pussy. You felt the cool leather of the belt against your skin as he ran it up and down your slit.
“This will be the first of many punishments for you, y/n.” He said, and you nodded your head in agreement. “And I hope that you enjoy them all.” He said, and you nodded your head again.
He slapped the belt against your ass, hard enough to make you cry out in pain. “Are you ready to be punished?” He asked, and you nodded your head yes.
He began to spank you, hard enough to make your ass sting and burn. Each slap brought a fresh wave of pain and humiliation.
After a few minutes, he stopped and stood up straight. “Stand up.” He ordered, and you complied immediately.
He pulled you over to the edge of his desk, where he bent you over and pulled your panties down to your ankles. Then he grabbed hold of your hips and pushed you forward until your knees were resting on the desk.
“Spread your legs apart for me.” He commanded, and you obeyed immediately.
He spread your legs wide apart, exposing your pussy to his view. “Look at this pretty little cunt.” He said, and you nodded your head in agreement. “Does it belong to me?” He asked, and you nodded your head yes.
“Good girl.” He said, and then he leaned forward and licked your pussy.
You moaned softly as he licked you, his tongue sliding over your clit and then down to your asshole. “Mmm, that’s a good girl.” He said, and you moaned again in response.
He continued to lick you, his tongue sliding over your clit. “I bet you wanted everyone in the fucking office to see this, with that fucking skirt on.” He said, and you moaned louder in response.
He continued to lick you, his tongue sliding over your clit faster and faster. “Fuck, I bet you’d love if they heard you right now..” He said, and you moaned louder still.
He leaned forward and kissed your pussy, his tongue sliding over your clit as he did. “You love being watched, don’t you?” He asked, and you moaned in agreement.
He leaned forward and sucked on your clit, his mouth moving up and down your pussy as he did. “Fuck, I bet you’d love it if they saw you taking my cock like a dirty little slut.” He said, and you moaned louder still.
Without much thought, Alhaitham pulled you close, spreading your legs further as his hard cock rested right below your slippery lips, just waiting to sink into you.
Without warning, Alhaitham plunged his cock deep into your pussy, causing you to gasp in surprise. “Fuck, that feels good.” He said, and you moaned in agreement.
He mindlessly rammed into you, feeling your clench around his cock while tears spilled out of your eyes, the thickness making you quiver.
“S-sorry, mmph, sir-! I won’t wear that skirt again, please, lemme cum!”
“Sluts don’t get what they ask for.”
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whimsic4alwasab1 ™ - do not copy, translate, modify, or claim any of my work as your own.
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13.00
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Non-Idol Choi San x (F)Reader
Summary: So maybe 'colour with numbers' was a serious activity after all.
Genre: Fluff
Warnings: None
Word Count: 1.6 k
Est.Read Time: 15 min
Rating: SFW
Networks: @cromernet @k-labels
@san-network
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"Um...in my defense um...at least she can colour well! Look, it's inside the lines." Scratching his eyebrow he smiled nervously at the paper in hand, who knew his daughter's teacher would call him in from work for this, the poor taekwon-do sabom had to leave his students in the hand of his newest trainee- let's just say he didn't trust the kids with Wooyoung, especially since they spent the last time he had left them alone, playing Uno for two hours straight.
"Mr.Choi, I understand you're a busy man, and running a dojang is difficult, however, I specifically remember telling you that your daughter still needs to work on her 'colour with numbers' skills." She sighed, rubbing her temples, this was an ongoing issue and she was yet to understand why the father of this cute little girl would not understand the gravity of learning colours and numbers.
"I- I know, Miss, but I- I tried, I even took Saturdays off from work to teach her, but she just doesn't listen, and she's very convincing when she has a certain point of view, I think she gets it from her mother." He chuckled, trying to use all tactics he'd learned in damage control, it is not like he didn't try, he did, but when he tried to explain to his little girl how the world works - the world of colouring with numbers- she had simply refused. She had looked up at her father with a similar pout, one that he knew resembled him, as mentioned by his wife ever since she was born, her hair tied up in a ponytail with a purple ribbon, little heart-shaped clips decorating the rest of her hair, matching her clip on heart earrings- her mother really did treat her like a doll sometimes- as she pointed at the flower and let out an "Appa, I like this colour more." And that's exactly how and why he let her colour the flower blue, the leaves yellow, the sky purple and the sun green. His little princess liked it that way and who was he to say no?
"Really now." The woman crossed her arms, leaning back against her chair as she eyed the bigger man, from the way his eyes turned into feline-like slits when he gave her that dimpled smile, his uniform jacket making him look bigger or perhaps he had grown bigger, and that- "What happened to your thumb?"
"Oh...I scratched it," he mused, eying the clock on the wall, 12.56 PM, thank god this was over, he probably couldn't take any more of this interrogation, honestly who was he to tell a child what to do and what no- when it came to colouring that is, otherwise Choi San wasn't the most lenient father, even with his daughter, he was soft, there was no doubt about that, but there was a set routine she was to follow, a balanced life is a healthy life. He wasn't swayed the slightest when she'd ask for dessert after bedtime, or when she'd ask to stay up late- his little girl deserved the best, so she'd get that cookie she asked for in the morning, but there was no comprise on her sleep schedule and he was glad his wife agreed with him most of the time, unlike when it came to colouring.
"Mr.Choi," she called out, snapping him back to reality as he cleared his throat, nodding at her, though his eyes averted from the table to her face, admiring the serious look she had adorned, one that the children loved, there was something about her that radiated 'authoritative figure' energy, no wonder it was difficult for her to daughter to not call her umma in class sometimes, but then again most of the children did, which is why she let it slide. Though her authority came with a sense of femininity, of maternity and empathy, where she'd know when to use the carrot and when to use the stick- his eyes flickered back to the clock, 12.58 PM before back at her eyes when she continued, "You need to understand, she'll fall behind in class and saying 'I like blue flowers and a purple sky' isn't an excuse, Hana is smart, mature too but she can't win her way out of it just because she gives her point of view."
His shoulders slumped in defeat, perhaps to her teacher, Hana was just another student, one that had the potential to excel and she would do her best to mould and shape that raw potential into the star her parents wanted her to be.
"I understand, Miss." He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck as he sat and stared at the papers on the table again, "I'll... talk to her about it, she can read though and can count to two hundred, my wife and I make sure to use interactive learning tactics with her, the whole relate and remember strategies." At this point he looked more guilty than a cat caught in the rain, head dipped in shame- did he forget he's the parent and not the student who is being talked about?
Shaking her head in disbelief she leaned forward to collect the papers, neatly stacking them together and placing them beside her purse, "I understand Mr.Choi, and not once do I doubt your efforts. Choi Hana is the brightest in the class, so I'd prefer if we keep it this way, I'm sure your wife would agree, even if it means telling your little girl she can't always have her way." She smiled at him gesturing towards the door, "Thank you for dropping by on such short notice today, knowing a parent is concerned about their child's progress, especially when both parents work, brings me great joy. I'm sure your wife is proud of you, especially since you came to the Parent Teacher Meeting, even if a bit late, it's nice to see a man supporting his career-oriented wife."
As soon as her monologue ended he stood up straight he gave her a respectable, grateful 90-degree bow, mumbling a thank you as he quickly made his way out of the classroom, closing the door as he leaned against the door, letting out a sigh. God, that woman was horrifying, it was like he was back in school again, no wonder he was horrified of going to school as a child, it's not like the woman was bad or evil, but why the hell did he feel like he was being punished, truly a nightmare.
He'd have to talk to Hana about this, he thought to himself, moving away and rolling his shoulders, trying to ease the pain, was this...old age- no, no, San it isn't, it was just the words of this teacher that made you realise the burden you carry, a responsibility you love, the responsibility of your wife and child. Taking his phone out of his pocket he glanced at the time, 13.00, finally, it was over, to think a parent-teacher conference could be this long and excruciating.
"Ready to go home?"
He turned to glance at the woman coming out from the class, closing the door behind her as she gave him a gentle smile, one that deceived his poor heart all those years ago, making him think he had fallen for an angel, who knew he was falling for -
"How was the PTM?" She asked again, wrapping her arms around his arm, shaking him slightly to bring him back to her, looking up at him with an all too familiar look, Hana, she'd look up at him like that when she knew she was winning.
"Great, babe." Smiling down at her he began walking towards the exit, "The teacher though was horrifying, she gets all worked up when she wears that blue cardigan, it was like I was her student and she was scolding me." He exasperated, opening the glass door for her, walking out to stop at the platform when she pulled away, hands on her hips as she frowned up at him- oh boy.
"Choi San, I specified what her weak areas were, she'll become stubborn if you keep this up- did you just call me horrifying!? And what's wrong with my cardigan!? Yah. Stop walking away." She called out, running down the stairs to catch up to him, watching him walk down the stairs, "Choi San!" Finally grabbing his hand when he reached the bottom of the stairs to wait for her, raising his eyebrows when she huffed out a breath, "Man, this used to be easier-"
"Old age, love?" He teased only to be smacked on the shoulder, whining in response, though he got a scoff in return, "Oh please, if that hurt you, then you should shut down the dojang."
"Nope, I can never win in this house," he mumbled shaking his head in defeat, though he tenderly laced his fingers with hers as the two continued to walk towards the gate of the primary school.
"Why were you so late?"
"I had a feeling the teacher would scold me, so I wanted to make sure no one else was there." He glanced down at her, smiling when she chuckled, "You deserved it."
"I know, I know, Saturdays are my tutoring days- I won't let my wife and my daughter down." He huffed puffing his chest with pride as he smiled at the sight of his little girl standing next to Wooyoung, waving at him- he probably let the kids go home early, that would've upset San, but seeing his two favourite girls could fix any ruined day in a matter of seconds.
Smiling up at him she squeezed his hand lovingly, taking in the way he gazed at their daughter with all the love and admiration in the world one could muster, "Like I said, I'm proud of you, both of you, and always will be."
"Yeah, that's why you're our favourite teacher, Mrs Choi."
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Taglist: @edenesth @yessa-vie @jaehunnyy @mlysalt @the-kpop-simp @spooo00oky
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littlexdeaths · 22 hours
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hi mari!!
first of all i LOVE the way you write! i love how you write eddie so much and i had a request for whenever you get the time and if you want to write it… so, i saw this spicy video (iykwim) and there was this thing that honestly made everything so much hotter. when the guy took off his girls panties he hung them on himself (he was already hard obviously) and he then f*cked her like that until they finished even on different positions……. i was speechless i have never seen anything like it and it was hot as hell!
so i was thinking of maybe you writing something like that where eddie surprises the reader by hanging her panties/thong on his hard pack and doing the reader like that. i just thought that was such an eddie/dilf!eddie thing to do i had to tell you hehe tell me what you think👀🤭
hi darling!!
and thank you so much, that really means a lot to me 🥹
also, im so sorry this definitely isn’t what you asked for, but this thought is just stuck in my head and i had to get it out. besides i needed something to make me giggle today.
so i hope this okay 🥺
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18+ ONLY MDNI
warnings: eddie is the biggest dork of all time, allusions to oral & sex, dick talk lmao
“Eddie, take them off please?” you whine, as he continues to brush his fingers over the elastic band.
He’s been at this for the last twenty minutes, touching you over your now soaked underwear. Before teasingly running his fingers back up along the seam.
And in turn driving you absolutely mad.
His eyes meet yours, mischief clouding his irises as he hooks his fingers beneath the elastic. He tugs them down slowly, letting his fingers graze along your thighs as he goes.
Once they are finally off you breathe a sigh of relief, spreading your legs wider for him. But he’s not looking at you now. Instead his gaze is focused on the pair of panties he has hooked around his index finger.
He swings them in a circle, ignoring your groan of annoyance, “Come on, Ed, what are you doing?”
If he hadn’t been teasing you for so long you might find his actions funny, but right now all you wanted was his face buried between your thighs.
“Just… hold on a second, babe.” He says, attempting to hold back a laugh. “I wanna try something.”
You watch in confusion as he suddenly pulls his hardened cock from the confines of his boxers. That confusion turns to mock horror as he hooks your panties around his shaft.
Eddie places his hands on his hips as he begins to swing them in a circle. The article of clothing begins to swing slightly, but it’s his cock that is gaining more momentum.
“Seriously, what are you doing?” You can’t help but laugh at the utter ridiculous display in front of you.
Your boyfriend peeks up at you from under his lashes, as he continues to swing his dick around even faster. His tongue pokes out from between his teeth, as a familiar look of concentration passes over his features.
“What’s it look like, sweetheart? Tryin’ to see if I can swing ‘em in a circle.”
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The Beast Wants to Tempt the Little Rabbit (Epilogue)
Translations may not always capture the exact nuances or tone of the original text. Expect grammatical errors and inaccuracies. Not proofread.
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Matias: "Don't move, or else I won't be able to get it off."
(Get off what?)
His fingers tickled my cheek for a moment before moving away.
Matias: "I finally got it."
Emma: "Was there something on me?"
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Matias: "Just a hair."
Emma: "I didn't notice, thank you."
(Maybe it was his way of not interfering with my mysterious rule, just because I mentioned I have to space out once a day.)
(I really think he's a kind person. He even politely goes along with my lies.)
------------Flashback-----------
Matias: "A crime is a crime. Your excuses hold no meaning."
Matias: "If you still wish to make excuses, do so in court."
Matias: "Whatever the reason, the law is something that must never be broken."
Matias: "Criminals have no right to beg for mercy."
---------Flashback Ends--------
I became a little curious.
Emma: "Could you teach me about the law now?"
I placed my hand on the law book, and he nodded.
Matias: "Sure. As a token of my gratitude to you."
Emma: "Then, may I ask one thing?"
Emma: "Is there no leniency in Acroite's laws?"
(This has been bothering me for a while now.)
In Rhodolite, judgments often consider the circumstances of the offender.
(But judging from his attitude earlier, it seems like Acroite...)
Matias: "I can't say there's none at all."
Matias: "There used to be, but now, as a matter of principle, there isn't. Regardless of the circumstances, we uphold equality under the law."
(Just as I thought.)
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Matias: "Strict laws have contributed to making Acroite the safest country on the continent."
Matias: "For example, crimes like fraud rarely occur because everyone in the country knows that the law is strict."
Emma: "Are the punishments severe as well?"
Matias: "Compared to your country, yes, they are. There's no need to show mercy to criminals."
Matias: "Everything is the fault of the guilty. This is the unshakeable foundation of justice."
(His country seems quite cold.)
While I believe that humans are creatures prone to making mistakes, his attitude suggests he doesn't even forgive those mistakes.
(Is this justice for the sake of equality?)
(My emotions might influence me, but I guess that's one way to look at it.)
I accepted his views without affirming or denying them.
Matias: "By the way, is there a specific number of minutes for your rule of spacing out?"
Emma: "It's over now! Sorry for the trouble!"
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Emma: "I'll focus on your lecture from now on. Thank you in advance!"
Matias: "Leave it to me. I'll cram the law basics into you in a few hours."
By the time we left the shop, the sky had already turned red.
(I might have underestimated the lecture.)
The lecture in which he began using the book turned out to be more comprehensive than I thought.
I was able to understand everything thanks to his easy-to-understand explanations, but perhaps due to the dense content, I still felt a little dizzy.
Matias: "Sorry. I got a bit carried away."
Emma: "Please don't apologize! It was very informative."
Matias: "Well, if you say so, but I may have overdone it since you were listening so attentively."
Matias: "I often get told off by my juniors for this, but finding the right balance is tricky."
Matias: "Especially with women. Honestly, this is my first time giving a lecture to a woman."
Matias: "I'll have to imagine and practice every possible scenario when I go home."
(This is his first time giving a lecture to a woman.)
I was surprised because most of the women we passed by would look at him when he was just walking around like this.
Jin and Nokto often attract female attention, but in his case, I feel a compelling "force" akin to butterflies drawn to honey.
Emma: "Are there no women around you?"
Matias: "There are plenty. But they're all unique."
Matias: "Whether they are as pretty as butterflies or as lovely as bunnies, they all change their attitude when I approach them."
(Ah.)
Matias: "But you, on the other hand..."
Suddenly, Matias stopped in his tracks.
Matias: "Miss Emma, are you sure there's nothing wrong with you when you're with me?"
Emma: "Hmm, I don't think so."
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The moment I replied, it was as if a dam had burst, and his charm overflowed, leaving me breathless with its intensity.
(He might be like this, but his presence feels like it's breaking some law.)
The overflowing charm of the most law-abiding prince, who seems to have gone to destroy order himself, is a guilty verdict in every sense.
(But he doesn't seem to be aware of it.)
Matias: "You're my only hope."
Emma: "Huh?"
He smiled warmly and clasped both of my hands.
Matias: "I thought I would never meet my ideal queen because women's attitudes often change, but..."
Matias: "If there's a woman as level-headed as you, there's still a chance."
Matias: "And someday, we'll greet the morning together, wrapped in a blanket, watching the early snow."
Emma: "Prince Matias?"
Matias: "Ahem. Anyway, you're my hope."
Matias: "I now have another reason to thank you."
(I may not fully understand everything he's dealing with, but he seems to have his own struggles.)
Emma: "I've received more than enough thanks today. I hope you find your wonderful queen."
Matias: "Yeah."
Emma: "And, Prince Matias, my house is just around the corner."
Matias: "I see. That was quicker than I thought. I guess this is it then."
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Emma: "Yes. Your lecture was fun and informative. I feel like I've become a bit smarter! Thank you for today."
Matias: "That's what makes you such a lovely woman."
(That charm again.)
Dizziness washed over me as he smiled charmingly. I tried to let go of his hand, but he held on tightly, stopping me.
Matias: "Would it bother you if I said I find it hard to leave?"
Emma: "Did you say something?"
Matias: "No, it must be your imagination."
(----?)
Matias: "If there's another chance, I'll teach you anything you want to know."
Emma: "In that case, I'd like to hear about your student days next."
(I'm really curious about their student life.)
Matias: "Sure. There's no shortage of stories from our school days."
With a sudden change of demeanor, he lifted my hand and kissed the tips of my fingers.
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Matias: "Until we meet again."
Matias: "Emma, I sincerely appreciate it."
Emma: "Likewise."
He reluctantly released my hand and walked away.
His beautiful figure gradually grew distant, and the gaze of the women also shifted away. 
(Matias is a kind and good person, but I wouldn't want to meet him in a courtroom.)
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Part 1 ╎ Part 2 ╎ Matias End ╎ Epilogue
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