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#i can't describe it but it infuriates me
somacruising · 2 years
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no one understands Shiba Miyakaze like i do
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neil-gaiman · 5 months
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hi neil! big fan! first time i've mustered the courage to ask you a question, haha.
it's good omens related: i've heard a lot of people (and been infuriated by them) over the past nine months saying that you only did the kiss because of the fan pressure. i want to know whether this is true or if you still would've done the kiss had the fandom not been begging you.
tysm for reading this! can't wait for season 3!
No, I came up with the kiss in December 2019 because John Finnemore and I had spent a day talking about the general plot of Season 2, when, late in the afternoon, sitting by the Regents Canal, John asked how it was actually going to finish, because, he told me, he is the kind of writer who needs to know how something is going to end before ever he starts. (I'm the kind of writer who normally finds out how things end when I get there.)
And when he asked, I thought for a bit about where I wanted to be at the start of Season 3, and then I described the last ten minutes of Episode 6 to John, including the kiss.
Given that we wouldn't tell anyone that we were doing more Good Omens for another 18 months, the daily asks saying "THEY HAVE TO KISS IN THE NEXT SEASON OTHERWISE YOU ARE QUEERBAITING US" had not started to come in yet, and by the time they did, the kiss, along with the rest of the scripts, had long since been written.
(And at no time has any fan ever pressured me to write a kiss at the end of Episode 6 that would break their heart.)
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taibhsearachd · 2 years
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...ngl, the fact that ADD and ADHD got condensed into ADHD when the hyperactivity specifically is part of the reason so many girls were simply not diagnosed drives me up the wall.
It's not that the whole name isn't bullshit, because it is. It describes the way people outside of our experience perceive us, as opposed to the difficulties that are part of our lived experience. Even from an outside standpoint, it's recognizable that "deficit" is not always the issue with our attention... but that's beside the point.
When psychiatrists noticed that ADD and ADHD were basically the same thing... they chose to favor the typical male presentation in the literal naming of the condition, and in doing so condemned a generation of girls (and other afab people) to suffer through being told they're so smart, they just don't apply themselves enough, that it's a personal failing they can't regularly turn in homework, that they're lazy for waiting until the last minute to work on an assignment... because those girls weren't hyperactive. Those girls just kind of drifted off and daydreamed in classes. Those girls doodled or wrote stories all through their school years, and functioned measurably worse when a teacher noticed they were doing that and tried to stop them. Those girls are now so many of my adult friends who are now being diagnosed with ADHD as adults, because the hyperactive part of the diagnosis almost solely applies to children (CHILDREN, when, I might note, this is a lifelong condition) who are socialized male.
We need a whole other name for the condition, because attention deficit is not our problem at all. But my god, the hyperactivity part actually ruined my life for so many years, because I had no way to explain to my dad why it physically hurt me to be bored, why I had to read or write or doodle in class in order to keep my focus, why I excelled in tests but failed at homework so my grades sucked because of that. No one even considered I might have ADHD, all through my childhood, but earlier this year I had the opportunity to go through all my grade school reports, and they could not be MORE CLEARLY talking about a child with ADHD. "Pleasure to have in class", "assignments not complete", "does not pay attention in class", "Birdie is a highly intelligent child with specific and unique needs" (I would LOVE more follow-up on that one, from third grade, do not have it). But I was a quiet and reserved child, so obviously I couldn't have ADHD.
I'm legitimately angry about it in retrospect. I went off my Adderall for a couple months recently, as an adult who only started taking Adderall as an adult, and it completely fucked up my ability to function. For years I was just out there as a teenager struggling through high school and college entirely unmedicated because as a child I was too withdrawn to be diagnosed. Fucking wild and also infuriating.
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sleepynoons · 2 months
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alhaitham x afab!f!reader, nsfw, 18+, not beta read
cw: omegaverse (alpha!alhaitham + omega!reader), heat, knotting, massive massive MASSIVE breeding kink, impregnation kink, size kink, slight sadism/masochism (more masochism if anything), mentions of pain + hurt, marking + biting, fingering, squirting, unintentional edging (receiving), allusions to dubcon + objectification (but none of it actually), slight nipple play, implied marathon sex
notes: sighs,,, idk how i ended up convincing myself to write omegaverse,,, but i really had a lot of fun with this,,, anyway, i love being an alhaitham fucker, and i love it even more when he loses it and can't be his usual put-together self. lmk if i missed anything in the warnings.
edit: 700+ notes?? y’all :((( i’m v touched and also cracking up lol omegaverse ig checks out - but tyssssm for all the love!! reminders that requests are still open (pls read my rules), and i’d love to have moots/anons!!!!
edit x2: 1,000+ notes... y'all... this is a massive milestone for me to hit - thank you so much for all the love on this lil drabble!! there's no amount of words that can describe how grateful i am, truly.
“ALHAITHAM, FASTER!”
you’re whining, sobbing, desperately begging your lover. anything will do – he can even just lie back and let you bounce up and down on his cock. but you’re only in such a frenzied, lucid state because of your heat. alhaitham, on the other hand, is a few weeks out from his next rut, which means he is able to think about what’s rationally best for you.
you’re infuriated. you need more. you need him to mount onto you, pounding and thrusting into you until you’re screaming for him to stop, and even then, he’ll continue to push you over the edge over and over again until you’re a sticky, fucked out doll. the fire in your belly is burning so passionately, and while you would say something snarky or sarcastic to rile alhaitham up, you can barely carry a thought and can only dig your fingernails into his biceps to convey your impatience.
your lover grunts at the piercing sensation and, through gritted teeth, says, “you just started your heat. rushing through it will only hurt you and lengthen your recovery process.”
you groan at his response, overtly dissatisfied and restless. alhaitham’s response is… it’s just so typical of him. he’s detail-oriented, almost scientific in the way he takes care of you. this isn’t your first heat with him, and he’s learned from prior experiences how to ensure your safety and comfort. in fact, the two of you now follow a procedure to prepare for your heat that consists of: gathering all of your favorite snacks and drinks; washing and prepping all of the pillows, clothes, and blankets you’ll need for your nest; and most importantly, figuring out a polite way of telling kaveh that he’s getting “sexiled.”
but this is overkill, you scream in your head. in missionary, alhaitham is going at a steady pace, but what he doesn’t know and can’t feel is that he’s edging you. he’s fanning the flames of your arousal yet never helping you reach the peak. he’s stimulating you at your most sensitive spots and parts, but it’s not enough for your release. he’s torturing you, and he can’t even tell.
“alhaitham,” you cry out for the nth time. “please, please, please! i can’t take it anymore! i just - i need your cock! i need to cum! please, please, i beg you, i promise you i’ll be fine! alhaitham!”
you’re breaking down into tears. by instinct, your body releases more of your scent, and somewhere beyond your crying, your lover takes a deep inhale.
while alhaitham isn’t in his rut, that doesn’t mean he can’t lose control. he hopes you know that he’s doing his best for you, that he’s holding onto the last shreds of his willpower because, if otherwise, he doesn’t know what will become of you. he’s so much bigger, stronger, sturdier than you are, towering over you in both size and strength. he can be painfully forceful, and inflicting pain upon you is the last thing he wants to do.
but you’re sobbing uncontrollably. you’re defenseless yet pleading him to take you roughly, to break in your pussy with his heavy, leaking cock. you want him to use his force to placate your insatiable heat. you need him to overpower you.
he releases a long, shuddering sigh. he attempts to rationalize, consider the potential repercussions of giving in. but he soon realizes he can’t think. your addicting, heady scent, combined with the beautiful sounds of your moans and whimpers, are rendering his mind empty.
it’s pointless. he growls, “you asked for this.”
one second you’re weeping, and the next all of the air inside you is knocked out by a sudden, harsh thrust from alhaitham. he’s going so fast and hard now, cock head brushing against your womb while his balls and knot slap against your asshole. you feel your toes curl at the feeling of being split apart, and your mouth parts to voice salacious moans.
this is what you wanted. you feel your body relax. you just have to take it, take his fat cock bullying your cunt open, take his harsh bites and teething at your nipples, take his seed until you’re filled to the brim. in your mind, all you can think is, you’re his, you’re alhaitham’s, he wants you. the omega in you croons happily, and you’re every bit as delighted as well.
alhaitham grips onto your wrists tightly as he shoves himself into your tight, sticky walls over and over again. at one point, he flips you over, commanding you to raise your ass up higher. as he holds onto your hips, he watches your ass bounce and jiggle as he pounds into you, and he wants to lick down the beautiful curve of your back. you’re doing your best to stifle your screams because somehow, your lover is reaching even deeper, and the scraping of your breasts against the bedsheets is driving you mad.
then, you feel one of alhaitham’s hands reach down, brushing against the fat of your thighs. it’s inching dangerously close to your throbbing clit, and heat rushes up to your face.
“wait, alhaitham, no –“ 
your lover pinches your yearning bud, and you scream. wetness gushing everywhere, you’re squirting and creaming, white cum staining your lover’s cock and leaking out of your pussy. your eyes roll back, and you’ve lost all ability to control your body, which is absolutely shaking as alhaitham continue to rub and flick at your clit as he tries to squeeze his knot into your fluttering hole.
“oh, archons! alhaitham! stop! no, no, it’s too much! it can’t fit!”
alhaitham, still teasing and toying with your pussy, leans over and snarls into your ear, “you were just saying you wanted more. now you can’t take it?”
you’re wailing. you feel as if you’re being ripped apart at the seams. but the thought of alhaitham’s knot is just too delicious to pass on, so you don’t complain anymore. you just accept the waves of pain and pleasure that crash over you as alhaitham finally locks his knot inside you and bites down on your neck.
your lover groans loudly, lost in his delirium as well. after a few more shallow grinds, he reaches his own high, and you feel rope after rope of his cum fill you up. alhaitham’s cum is so warm and gooey and thick that you’re drooling and slobbering over the pillows at being filled up so thoroughly – impregnated – with it.
even as he’s still cumming, alhaitham bites on the shell of your ear and commands, “keep up, because i’m not stopping anytime soon.”
you can only whimper and fist the blankets even tighter at his command, bracing yourself for the next round.
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just-cofffee · 7 months
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The annoyance was evident through that peaceful and dull face that always seemed to have, alluding to how tedious the conversation they were having seemed.
"Just tell her," Suguru repeated for the fourteenth time.
A disheartened sigh escaped Satoru's lips. "You don't understand, it's not that easy."
"Why?" Suguru's voice already had a hint of frustration.
"You still ask why? Do you think I can go there and say, 'Hey Y/n, what I want to say is that I've never seen you simply as a friend. From the moment I saw you, I knew you were the only thing I wanted in my life. Your beauty has captivated my eyes and made me ignore all other women. The softness of your skin is my deepest longing, and the light in your eyes and the grace with which you move completely envelop me. My life has taken on an absolute meaning from the moment your presence blessed my eyes. For me, your mere existence is like a balm that calms my soul and ignites a fire in my heart. Every time I see your sweet smile and receive your attention, I feel like the whole world fades away and only you and I exist. It infuriates me to the core when some idiot approaches you, because I know none of them are worthy of your brilliant sense of humor, your infinite kindness, and your captivating charisma. Although I feel selfish desiring that only I can be the one you give your love and attention to, I can't help it, because you are the most valuable and precious thing in my life. I don't know if I'm worthy of you, but I'm willing to fight and show you every day that I'm capable of loving you with an unwavering passion. These words are just a desperate attempt to describe the magnitude of what I feel for you, but I know in the deepest part of my being that my love for you transcends words and is eternal.'". His chest rose and fell rapidly as if he hadn't breathed while talking about Y/n.
"Satoru…," Suguru murmured with a slightly mocking tone.
"She doesn't like me, she's going to tell me she likes Nanami. She's always been very close to him, and one day Shoko told me that Y/n had a crush on him and-"
In the midst of his despair, Suguru interrupted with a mocking tone, mentioning Satoru's name. This made Satoru stop and look at him confusedly. Suguru nodded behind Satoru with his chin, and at that moment, Satoru paled even more. A feeling of frost traveled down his back and settled in his stomach, causing a deep discomfort. She had heard everything.
"You also like me, Toru."
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kadwrites · 1 year
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young love | T.S
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previous part | next part
or check out the series masterlist
summary ; a person from your past makes an appearance.
warnings ; arranged marriage!trope , fem!reader , idk what the hell is happening , SLOW burn
a/n ; i promise that i have a plot but i keep getting side tracked????
-
"what the fuck are ya doing here?" you pull the front door shut
"hello to ya too."
you look at him again , brows raised "what brought ya here hmm?"
"ya didn't even invite me to your engagement party." he looks down at you, his voice teasing
"oh i'm sorry" you let out a small outraged laugh "i didn't know that inviting your ex boyfriend was an engagement tradition."
"aren't ya glad to see me?" he gives you a sly smile
"what brought ya here?" you grit your teeth , looking up at him
"i came here for ya."
"for me?"
"to save ya."
"from what?" your patience is thinning
"well i couldn't let ya get married to someone like 'im could i?" he chuckles "not after the love we had for eachother."
"jeremy." you pinch the bridge of your nose "that was years ago," you try to not raise your voice "do ya even know who i'm marrying?"
"oh i do."
"ya do?" you laugh "and ya thought trying to convince his fiancée to run away is a good idea?"
"you're making a mistake."
you just look up at him, laughing. "jeremy, ya slept with your sister in law, i don't think you're qualified to give me any kind of guidance."
"i'm a changed man" he leans down to whisper to you
"no you're not!" you let out an angry breath , trying to compose yourself "what do ya think tommy shelby would do if he found out you're here? hmm?" you hiss at him
"i love ya." he looks at you, his eyes bore into yours , inching closer
"oh my god" you put a hand over your face, turning,
"i do, i can't let ya go" he hand touches your arm
"oh my fucking god!" your voice becomes high pitched , your eyes opened wide "why are ya still talking? do ya want to get killed?" you whisper angrily, keeping your voice down
"i can't let ya do this" he begs , he pleads
"yes ya can, ya just walk away" your hands wave at the door
"did ya not hear what 'appened to his first wife?" his nostrils flare in frustration
your jaw slacks , you feel as if your eyes would bulge out of their sockets
"do ya know what would 'appen to ya if he heard ya say this?" your voice is low.
he closes his eyes, licking his lips before speaking "look..."
"no" you raise a hand , stopping him before he could get another word in "i don't particularly like ya, but i'm telling ya this as a favor for old times sake" you point at the door "leave , and never come back"
"i'm not leaving ya."
"this isn't a joke, jeremy" you can't help the angry chuckles that keep coming out of you "this is probably the stupidest decision you've ever made."
"do ya want to marry 'im?" his eyes scan your face, studying you
"this is none of your concern." infuriated wouldn't even begin to describe what you felt, "what i do with my life is none of your fucking concern"
"i know ya , this is not something ya would do."
"ya said it yourself, you're a changed man now" you try to explain, "we're different, ya and i are so different now, we are not the same kids we used to be. this isn't what it used to be."
he doesn't say anything else in return, he walks out, shutting the door loudly behind him
you have a hand over your forehead , pacing around the living room, renee is still in her place, watching.
"you brought him here didn't you?" your mother stood in the living room with her hand on her hips, looking you up and down
"mum ... please stop." you stop in your tracks , frustrated "how would i bring 'im here? with telekinesis? i didn't even know he still lives in birmingham for fuck's sake."
she comes closer , gabbing your shoulders "we need to forget this, never speak of it in front of tommy"
"what if he comes back again?" you start to panic "what if he does something worse than this?"
she closes her eyes at the possibility, she doesn't answer.
"this is just what i fucking needed" you turn, plopping down on the sofa
"jeremy is a sweet boy... he wouldn't do anything, would he?" your mum picks at her cuticles nervously ,
you look up with a raised brow "he fucked his brother's wife while we were dating, his brother who by the way raised 'im." you rub at your temple "his moral compass is as useless as that brain of his."
"god, now i know why i always hated him."
"and yet ya wanted us to get married at 17."
"well i didn't want him to knock you up."
"so ya tried to talk me into marrying 'im?" your mother's logic made your head spin faster than it already was "ya know what, forget i asked that" you wave a hand
"what are ya going to do now?" renee finally speaks,
you and your mother look at each other, before looking at renee
"i don't know.." you mumble "i 'ave to go see 'im today, to talk about the wedding venues" you groan, the stress of it all comes back to her
"okay" renee gets up, and sits next to you "ya just act normal, ya get this done, ya forget about it for today and then tomorrow ya try thinking about solutions."
you smile when you step into his office, your hands clasped in front of you, and he's on his chair, a cigarette dangling from his lips.
"why do ya look like that?"
"like what?"
"ya're too happy to see me."
you raise a brow "ya don't want me smiling at ya?"
"ya look possessed." he deadpanned, exhaling a cloud of smoke, his thumb scratching lightly at his lips, hiding his smile
you kiss your teeth, "i hope ya choke in your sleep." you walk up the chair and sit down
he chuckles, looking at you with his head tilted slightly "you'll miss me?"
"believe me , i won't."
"what's wrong?"
your brows pinch together "nothing is wrong"
"really?"
"yes."
"you're a very bad liar."
"i'm just ... tired" you shrugged, your voice squeaked
it's not that you're not used to lying, it's that you have a hard time lying to him
"how's your mum?"
a genuine amused smile pains over your lips, "she's good"
"who told ya?" he nods at you
"who told me what?"
"that i talked with your mother" he continues "was it your two nosy friends?"
"hey hey hey" you put a hand up "don't insult my friends"
"they are nosy, it's the truth"
-
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pretty-little-mind33 · 4 months
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Tom Ryder x fem!reader
Summary: You're Tom's makeup artist for a movie he's shooting and you absolutely hate him. However, one round of karaoke later, your feelings temporarily shift.
Genre: Fluff, smidge of angst, Enemies to Lovers (very one-sided lmao)
Warnings: Tom is a stupid asshole (but he's also just a mess), swearing, reader is described as shorter than Tom, light misogyny, slapping, alcohol, being drunk/high.
TOM RYDER MASTERLIST
The bar is dimly lit and the loud music resounds in your ear as your knee bounces. You stir the straw around your drink, sighing as you turn to Vanessa, your co-worker. "He left me another post-it note on the desk yesterday telling me he wants a new lip oil because his now tastes weird!? His last one is only from last week and it's the same brand he always uses! I'm so sick of his bullshit, V," you drop your head in your arms and then peek up at Vanessa again, "He's such a dick."
Vanessa laughs, sipping on her margarita, as she shrugs, "Didn't you know that when you took the job, honey?"
"I mean, sure. But those could have been rumors," you pout and sit up, moving some hair behind your ear as you look around the room, where other crew members have gathered around the karaoke machine.
"Listen, don't think about Tom Ryder. You're off the clock and everyone knows he's a world-class asshole—a pretty world-class asshole, I will let him have that," Vanessa hums and also turns her attention to the rest of your friends and co-workers as she claps her hands. 
You look down at your drink, your cheeks feeling warmer than usual. Not thinking about Tom Ryder was easier said than done when you had to work on his face 5 days a week. He was so infuriating most times, either talking down to you when you worked or wouldn't cooperate with anything you told him to do because he was on his phone. Sometimes he really makes you want to stab the mascara stick into his eye. 
Still, you can't deny he's extremely handsome and that just annoys you more. 
Suddenly, you hear a bunch of cheers and hoots from outside, directly accompanied by the sound of the door slamming open. When you hear an all too familiar voice, your eyes widen and you snap around to make sure you hadn't just imagined it. 
Tom Ryder coming to one of the crew parties? No fucking way. Obviously, he's always invited to them but in a very arrogant fashion he never shows up—which is one of the reasons you do, because he never does. 
Only this time he did and he's not alone. 
Tom is dressed in another one of his boisterous outfits, his shirt loosely unbuttoned to reveal his chest and a peak of his toned abs. Pink-tinted sunglasses sit on his nose and his dirty blond hair curls messily around his face.
He looks drunk, or high, when he walks in and you can't tell which one it is because he's constantly moving and laughing. He's accompanied by a few other low A-list actor friends he has and a pretty blond model hangs on his arm, her giggles instantly infuriating you. 
How can she stand to be near him for more than a minute? Even less hold his arm and be his eye-candy? 
You turn back around, desperately attempting to calm the bile rising in your throat. God, you hate him. You feel even worse when he leans beside you at the bar and orders a drink from the bartender, snapping his fingers as he does. He doesn't even address your presence beside him and your blood boils. 
Your anger immediately turns to disgust when you hear the man hosting the karaoke scream out Tom Ryder's name.
"Tom Ryder everyone! I loved your new movie, man, it was awesome! How about a song?" the man asks, eyebrows wiggling as the crew clap (mostly out of politeness) and his friends make loud, drunken noises like a bunch of animals. 
"C'mon! One song—for all the pretty ladies in the crowd!"
Tom seems intrigued when the man mentions the girls. You roll your eyes and your hand tightens around your glass as he walks up to the host, raising his hands in surrender and feigning humbleness. "Alright, alright, I have to give the ladies what they want, don't I?" Tom boasts, winking at one of the camera girls he never looks at otherwise. 
Someone put you out of your misery now.
The host seems ecstatic to have someone this famous next to him and asks Tom for a quick photo, which Tom obviously doesn't turn down. You pretend to gag when Vanessa turns to look at you and smirks at Tom's behavior.. 
"How about a duet, Ryder?" The host asks as he hands him the mic. 
"Nah, I usually sing solo," Tom says, his words slightly slurred, and then he leans in to whisper something in the host's ear—which probably goes something like, "Unless she's got a nice rack, then by all means invite her up here." 
You lean in and whisper into Vanessa's ear, "Ten bucks he takes home the girl he ends up singing with," you say with a frown, your voice a little strained. Vanessa laughs and then the worst thing happens.
"You," the host shouts and you look up alarmed. Your eyes are wide when you realize everyone, including Tom, is staring at you. "The angry-looking girl in the back. Why don't you come up and join him? I doubt he'd bite." 
Laughter, including some nervous ones from your friends, resounds around the room as Tom's smirk widens. You'd be surprised, you think. You find your voice again and say, "Um, can't you ask one of them?" you point to the group of eager fangirls swarming around the small stage as they ogle Tom. 
"C'mon, sweetheart," Tom slurs, squinting at you, "One song won't kill you." 
But you might just kill him.
Vanessa, the traitor, nudges you again and you stumble from the stool. You glare at her but when all your friends, including Tom's more obnoxious friends, chant encouragements you feel completely trapped. 
The walk to the small stage feels eerily similar to a walk of shame as you look to your co-workers in hopes someone will save you. No one does and you ignore the stares from all the girls who wish they could take your place. 
You're blinded by the lights as you step on the stage and approach the host. "Atta girl," the man smirks patronizingly as he hands you the second mic. You scrunch your nose at him and then look up at Tom, expecting him to be ignoring you like he usually is, but instead, he's staring. 
His cheeks are pink from being intoxicated and he tilts his head, watching you clutch the mic nervously. 
The host doesn't warn you when the song begins to play and he walks away. You realize too late you and Tom are now alone and everyone is watching you as dread slowly fills your stomach. 
You don't even know how to sing! This is so humiliating. 
 The familiar melody of, "Don't Go Breaking My Heart," fills the air and you feel the heat rise in your chest and up to your ears. Your heart is pounding so loudly you can only faintly hear Tom start to sing the song. He sounds fairly good and you aren't surprised considering he's an actor. 
Your voice catches in your throat and you feel tears rise. You don't sing when it's your turn and the crowd is silent. 
Suddenly, you jump when you feel a strong hand on your hip and you snap your head around to look at him. Your hand finds Tom's hand immediately, gripping it, and just as you're about to pull it away, he leans in and whispers, hot against your ear, "Baby doll, you're making me look bad," he states, his tone as condescending as it always is, and your heart does a somersault in your chest.
He looks down at you this time, his blue eyes lock with yours for a moment and his hand falters on your hip. For an actor, Tom Ryder has surprisingly no poker face because when he sees your distressed state, his demeanor shifts, and instead of frustration, he takes on a different approach.   
He takes your hand, suddenly twirling you around and you make a small sound as you stumble. It's been a few seconds since anyone has sung the song, so he sings again and this time, his eyes stay on yours as he sings your lyrics.
"You know this," he mouths, encouraging you as he does this weird, clearly drunk-induced shimmy that makes you laugh despite your better judgment. He points to the small screen where the lyrics are displayed.
You take a breath and then sing, focusing on him instead of the crowd and your head feels light. You would have never guessed there would be a day when you'd find comfort in Tom Ryder. Your friends clap with amusement and laughter swirls around the bar as you both continue to sing and dance. 
Occasionally, Tom will pull you in closer but you'll move away, flustered, and when the song finally ends, you move back and almost trip on the mic's cord. 
With a gasp, you expect to fall flat on your ass but instead, Tom wraps his arm around your waist and pulls you into him as your palms press on his chest. You're breathing heavily and so is he, his hand is still on your back as his eyes roam over all your features until you push him away and walk down the small stairs and back to the ground where all your friends are whispering and clapping. 
You feel like you can't breathe, your heart beating so quickly. You mumble a quick "excuse me" to Vanessa, snatch your purse from the bar counter, and open the door to outside. The cool air calms your burning skin and you lean against the building. 
What the fuck was that? Why was he looking at you like that? 
"You know, it's normal to be nervous around someone like me," Tom's voice interrupts your panic and you spin around, not expecting to see him. "But running from me? Now, darling, that's truly a first," he finishes with a chuckle and an obnoxious smirk. 
"You're so full of yourself," you whisper automatically but then your eyes round as if you've realized what you'd said. 
Tom looks surprised but he also remains cool as he strokes a hand down his jaw and puts it on his hip. "Mm, I assume you're not a fan then." 
You cross your arms and look anywhere but directly at him because fuck, why did someone so incredibly stupid and pretentious have to be so darn hot? "You could say that, sure," you shrug. "Not everyone likes you, Tom Ryder." You shut yourself up as soon as the words leave your mouth. This isn't exactly something you should say to someone who you work with.
However, Tom's expression sours and he lifts his eyebrow. "You don't like me?"
You turn to him, eyes locking with him this time. "That isn't what I said."
Tom's eyebrows crease and he squints at you, removing his stupid sunglasses and they push back his blond hair. "You're confusing me." He sounds genuine. 
You can't help but chuckle at his idiocy and surprisingly for you, your laughter makes him smile. He leans in and you lean away, eyes round when you realize how close he's becoming. "You have such a sexy laugh," he says cockily, "Bet I can make you do it again."
You hate to admit this but your heart does flutter at his words. Can anyone really blame you? It's Tom. Fucking. Ryder. You try to remind yourself how much of a dick he is—and always has been—but as you look into the blue of his eyes, his reassuring touch burns imprints on your skin and you feel dizzy. 
Shit. 
"You look familiar," Tom straightens himself, "Have I seen you somewhere? You been in any magazines? You certainly have the look."
You ignore the so-called complement and stare at him. He has to be kidding. You've been doing his makeup for over six months now and he supposedly sees you almost every day. You worked on his face every single day—how could he not recognize you? You open your mouth to ask if this is a joke but he interrupts you.
"Seriously, I must know you from somewhere. Gimme a hint, baby,"
Your stomach sinks and you feel so so stupid. Tom doesn't sense your shift as he's still focused on whatever fleeting emotion may have been between you before as his hand finds your hip. 
Instantly, your palm connects with his cheek, and the sound cracks into the air. "Don't touch me," you say harshly, ignoring how shaky your voice is.
Tom looks at you, his hand over his bruised cheek, "You hit me?!" he says in disbelief, "What the fu—" 
You don't stick around to hear his whining as you turn around and run from him. 
Again. 
"Hey–wait!" you hear Tom's shout but why would you turn around now? Tears of frustration brim your eyes as you hastily walk down the empty sidewalk.
There is no way you're fucking crying over Tom fucking Ryder right now, you tell yourself and pinch the inside of your eyes. 
No way. 
You ignore Vanessa's incessant calling and her worried texts when you arrive at your apartment. You scream in frustration, throwing your heels across the room and scaring your poor cat, Pumpkin, as she sprints into the living room, her claws against the floorboards.
Quickly, you follow her and scoop her into your arms, "'M sorry, baby," you coo and nuzzle your nose into her fur. "I'm sorry Mommy scared you."
You hear Vanessa's fifth call from your purse but you're too exhausted to deal with her and the fallout from what had happened tonight, so instead you sit on the couch and cuddle with Pumpkin, scratching behind her ears. 
* * * 
When you pull into the parking lot of the new set the next morning, you haven't slept well and you feel like shit—it doesn't help that they're filming outside today, in the summer heat, and grainy sand infiltrates into your Converse. 
You groan as you walk over to the makeup trailer and see Vanessa waiting for you. You almost called in sick this morning until you realized how guilty that would make you look, so you sucked it up. 
"Y/n?!" Vanessa shrieks and pulls you behind the trailer. "Where have you been?! I've called you a hundred times, why haven't you answered any of them? I was worried Ryder somehow took you home and that I'd lost 10 bucks—" 
"Gross, why would you think that?" you say with disgust as if you weren't surprised to hear that after you left Tom hadn't returned to the bar. 
"I mean, for one, Ryder was missing and no one knew where he went. And second, are you shitting me? Girl, the tension was more than palpable! You were practically dry-humping Tom Ryder in front of everyone!" 
You feel like someone has just punched you in the stomach and your voice comes out high and nervous when you exclaim, "I was not! It wasn't like that, V! Is that what everyone thinks?" Vanessa nods as an answer and you want to scream. 
"I swear, I- nothing happened—even outside—I- funny story I slapped him because he's a jerk and I- I don't like him!" you ramble and your heart thumps quicker when Vanessa looks behind you and her mouth curls into a devious smirk.
"Don't look now, sweetie, but your boyfriend just arrived," she pauses and checks her watch, "An hour late. As usual." Vanessa looks you dead in the eyes and then she teases, "Chop chop, time to put makeup on your man." 
Your eyes widen and you pull Vanessa further behind the trailer so Tom won't see you or her. You hold her shoulders. "Please switch with me for today. He won't even notice the difference, and Allie doesn't need to have her makeup done until noon so that way I don't have to see him! Please, V, I'll do anything!" 
Vanessa crosses her arms, "Nothing happened with him, hm?"
You look at her, your eyes round and pleading, "Please."
"Fine, but you're paying for my lunch later," she says and taps your nose, "and giving me a detailed rundown on what happened with Ryder."
You nod reluctantly, whispering a small thank you under your breath as she turns to walk into the makeup trailer behind Tom. You let out a breath, leaning against the trailer. You know you'll have to face him at some point—just not now.
The day drags on and on as the heat is becoming almost unbearable. You stand to the side, your makeup kit secured to your hip as you watch the scene from under a tent. It's another action sequence and it's very obvious Tom's makeup is fading from the warmth and his sweat. 
Shit, you realize, he needs a touch-up. Vanessa didn't use the correct primer. 
You look around, hoping to see Vanessa and tell her Ryder needs a touch but the director's voice cuts in and you tense, "Cut! Someone come to fix his face!" Jody turns to you, her eyes kind as her voice becomes a little less stressed when she sees you're prepared for this, "Can you fix his makeup?" 
Shit, shit, shit. 
This is your job, you can't say no so you walk out onto the set where Tom is leaning against a prop rock. He straightens himself and when he turns, he doesn't have the chance to process your presence as you guide him down and fumble with your kit. 
He's taller than you so he's leaning down so you can fix him up properly. You put your hand on his jaw, near his ear, to steady him as you touch up under his eyes and near his cheekbones. 
He's staring at you and you know he recognizes you this time, his blue eyes wide and puppy-like. 
Silently, you add some powder on his cheeks and nose so the product sticks better this time and when you let him go, Tom opens his mouth to speak, but you shake your head no, and then you turn your head and hurry back behind the camera. 
Your ears are burning from embarrassment as you walk directly to the makeup trailer, without looking back at anyone. 
You've barely closed the door when it slams open and you scream. You spin around just as someone tries to hold onto your arm and on instinct you grab the hairspray that's in your kit and spray it directly into… Tom's eyes. 
He screams too, his voice high-pitched and very un-sexy, as he clutches his eyes. Seeing him only causes you to scream again. "Ryder?!" you exclaim and immediately take his arm, pulling him inside the trailer as he wails like a child and rubs at his eyes. 
You slap his hands away and push him down under the faucet, pouring water into his eyes and in the process drenching his blond hair and ruining his mascara. 
"Fuck," he groans as he sputters out water as he jerks away from you. You move closer to him and without thinking hold both of his cheeks in your hands, looking directly into his, now slightly irritated, eyes. 
"Does it hurt?" you whisper, clearly concerned. 
Tom rests his hands on yours and pulls them away, "What do you think?" he groans and blinks a few times. "You're the girl—" he mutters and pinches his nose, "at karaoke. I remember you now."
You realize how close you are to him now and, overwhelmed, you step back. "Lucky me," you mumble sarcastically and take his arm, pulling him to one of the seats. "I have to fix your face again or someone is gonna fire me." 
He's weirdly docile as he looks at your work as you dry his hair. Once you're done, he speaks up, "Why'd you run from me? I mean, c'mon, the way you looked at me with those fuck-me eyes—" 
Tom has no shame and of course, he wouldn't. He's probably never really been rejected in his entire life and women have most likely let him speak to them like this. You pause and pull his chin harder so he's looking at you as you continue with his mascara. 
"Tell me honestly Ryder, do you even hear yourself when you speak?" you ask, your voice strained. 
"What?" Tom asks, sounding genuinely confused. 
"You're an asshole. That's why I ran from you." You drop his chin and your word vomit comes out without you being able to help it as you cross your arms, "I mean—I have been doing your makeup for months! And you've only ever left me your stupid post-it notes when you have a demand! No "Hi," "Good morning," "How are you?" No. Nothing like that. And I tried! I really tried in the beginning because like everyone else on this fucked up planet I thought you were awesome."
Tom opens his mouth to make a snide comment but you instantly press your finger to his lips. 
"I really thought, "I'm so lucky to be Tom Ryder's makeup artist!" and then I found out Tom Ryder is a shit person that doesn't—"  
"I'm not a shit person," Tom deadpans and stares at you as if your words have hurt him. 
You tilt your head and drop your arms to your side. You don't even know what to say to him anymore. 
"Okay, okay, I'm sorry I made you feel shitty, okay?" Tom defends and his cheeks are pink, "I just—I am really bad with faces—and I-I was completely shit-faced and high on–" 
He pauses, stands, and wraps his hand around your jaw, his thumb stroking your bare cheek as your eyes widen and you tense. Something about his charm makes it impossible for you to move and because his touch is gentle, you aren't too worried. For now. "'M sorry. I am. Can't we call it even since you hit me and sprayed me in the face with whatever that fucking was?!"
He continues, "—listen, I liked karaoke with you and I was shit-faced so I know I must have been a dick."
"You're always a dick, Ryder," you comment, your tone less mad than earlier.   
"Then, you don't know me very well," Tom shrugs, "or like at all." 
"So—you're saying all this dick-ishness is a persona?" You sound very skeptical and Tom just shrugs as his thumb strokes over your skin once more and then he drops his hand, putting some distance between you and him. 
"No. Not entirely. But, you know, that doesn't mean I'm incapable of genuine feelings, Y/n."
You're surprised when you hear your name fall from his lips. Tom sees your expression and another one of his smirks curls at his lips, "As I said, I remember you now. Always did—my hot makeup artist—ask anyone—ask Gail, I mention you a lot. I was just hammered, you know? High out my mind—and it heightened all my fucking senses that I couldn't get your laugh out my head for hours." 
"If you're joking," you say and glare at him, "it isn't funny." 
Tom puts a hand on his heart dramatically, "'M not. Scouts fucking honor." 
You look at him and for once, you can't read him. "Well, either way, that doesn't change how much of an asshole you've been to me. You never said "hi" but you told Gail about me? Sorry, but that doesn't impress me."
You walk up to him and tilt his head using his chin, examining his make-up once more, and then you take his arm and try to pull him out of the trailer, "Now, c'mon, you have a job to do—go do it," you hiss.
"But—" 
"No," you start but he won't move. He turns around and stares at you. Fuck, he's strong. "Why won't you leave?" you ask, breathless as you step away from him. 
"Do you hate me so much that you won't even consider that I genuinely find you interesting?" he asks with a hint of insecurity in his voice again. "That I liked spending time with you and I think you're pretty."  
Your chest tightens and you sigh, "I- I don't know," you admit and you look up at him. You can't deny that your feelings have shifted and a little voice in your head screams that this is a trap and he'll eventually break your heart. 
"Here," Tom fumbles with the pants of his costume and pulls out a pen and a post-it note. 
"You seriously just carry those on you?" you crack a smile, finding that weirdly endearing. 
Idiot. 
"Yeah," Tom says like it's the most normal thing ever and then he writes down something on the paper. When he hands it to you it's the name of a restaurant. You frown, it's your favorite restaurant. He'd written a time beside the name. 
"How do you know this is my favorite restaurant?" you ask. 
Tom looks up, his smirk turning into a smile. "I didn't—it's mine."
Your frown deepens, "Hm, I didn't take you for a low-priced family-run Chinese restaurant kinda guy—don't you have a personal chef or something," you say and look at the time he's written down, "What is this anyway?" 
Tom shrugs and adjusts his hair. "I do but I like this place. The family who owns it never tells anyone I've been there, it gives me some privacy," he sounds serious and he walks closer to you, "Don't tell anyone, it might ruin my reputation and then your favorite restaurant might be swarmed by a bunch of fangirls," he smirks, pleased with himself. 
You can't help but chuckle. 
"And this," he points to the time, "is where I'll be tomorrow evening if you'd like to join me," he says nonchalantly and then opens the trailer door. Just as he does, he takes his phone and takes a picture of the time so he remembers it and he sends you a wink. "I won't wait long but if you do come, it's on me." 
You stare at the paper and realize Tom Ryder has just asked you on a date. You look up but he's gone and your heart does about ten thousand summersaults as your brain screams in agony. Your cheeks feel warm as you fold the paper up and put it in the pocket of your jeans. 
You're so very screwed.
You hear a ding and then a text from Vanessa saying, "Ryder's mic was on—crew heard absolutely everything—we didn't wanna interrupt your moment," she adds a mocking winking emoji but you don't care. 
That's the least of your worries now that you have a date with Tom Ryder.
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nocturnalrat · 1 year
Note
Hear me out…
1610! Miles comforting reader after she get jealous because of how much he’s been around Gwen and he’s just touching and kissing her in all the right places and makes sure that reader knows that he loves her and only her 🙈💕
Thank you for the great prompt! I had lots of fun writing this. :p <3
---
It was truly infuriating.
You hadn’t seen each other in a week due to school work keeping you busy, and there had been a surge of criminal activities in New York, which is why Miles had been occupied most of the time as well.
And now, when the two of you were finally able to hang out again, he kept talking about someone else entirely.
You were lying on the bunk bed in his dorm room, listening to him ramble on about the adventures he had lived through last week.  
“You should have been there, the way Gwen incapacitated the guy was like something out of a movie.” He gesticulated frantically with his hands as he vividly described last night’s care chase.
"That sounds really fascinating," you grumbled.
After hearing your unfazed (and slightly sarcastic) tone, he looked up from his chair. "You don't sound very impressed, though."
How could you have told him that his constant stories and songs of praise about Gwen were starting to annoy the heck out of you?
Jealousy was an ugly emotion. To confess to it was shameful, exposing; you wanted to be the easy-going, cool and confident kind of girlfriend, but Miles was making it really hard for you to not seethe with anger and discontent.
"Everything okay?" he asked, and you avoided his gaze. Lying was easier when you didn’t look him into his eyes. They always were too honest and seemed to notice too much.
"Sure," you said.
He saw through your charade immediately, and climbed onto the bunk bed to be closer to you.  "There's something bothering you. I can tell."
"You can't tell shit," you said before you could stop yourself. There was anger in the pits of your stomach threatening to take over.
"Did I say something wrong?"
Yes.
"No."
"Then why are you frowning like that? It looks like you’re ready to kill someone. It better not be me."
Fuck. Were you really scowling that obviously?
"You and Gwen get along great, huh?”
"We certainly do." He tilted his head. You recognized that look on his face – it was the same one he had when struggling to solve complicated math problems. "Why’d you bring her up?"
"Why do you keep bringing her up?" you snarled. "We weren’t able to have a single conversation in the last few weeks without you mentioning her a dozen times. Not to mention the fact that you spend way more time with her than you do with your actual girlfriend.”
Shoot. Now you had done it; you had shown weakness.
Miles stared at you incredulously. "Wait a minute - are you jealous?"
You crossed your arms and looked pointedly at the ceiling.
"Absolutely not."
"Nuh-huh. That's why you're pouting." He grinned, and his lighthearted reaction only intensified the nauseating feeling of jealousy. "You know, part of me wishes you could come with us when we're patrolling, just so you could witness how much I talk about you when I'm with Gwen. But the other part of me is terrified of you being with us, as it would be incredibly dangerous for a civilian.”
"Yeah." Biting sarcasm. "I'm sure that's what you talk to her about."
"It is!" He scrambled over to you and leaned in close. "You don't have the faintest idea how important you are to me, do you?
"Can’t be that important, judging by your behavior.”
"Not that important!" he repeated indignantly. "I think about you all the time. How you're doing, what you're doing, if you need anything - always. You're the first thing I think about when I wake up, and the last thing when I go to sleep!"
"Well, you sure as hell don’t act like it,” you mumbled.
“What do I have to do to make you believe me?” He brushed an unruly strand of hair from your forehead, and the gentleness of his touch loosened the knot in your stomach the jealousy had caused. You had only recently started dating, so every little touch of his felt all the more exciting.  
You looked at him, and his wide eyes were filled with worry.
“Do you guys have to hang out so much?” you asked reluctantly. “How would you feel if I suddenly spent all of my time with an attractive guy who was single?”
He furrowed his brows. “Well, I wouldn’t be thrilled,” he began slowly. Then he shook his head. “Okay, scratch that, I’d be really pissed.”
You almost laughed. He was just like you.
“Then you know exactly how I feel.”
He kissed the corner of your mouth. "You really have no idea, do you?"
The almost-kiss had distracted you, and it took a moment for you to reply. “No idea about what?” you asked, a little breathless.
"About the things I'd do to make you happy." With a tender gesture, he took your face in his hand and caressed your cheek. "I love you more than anything in this world." The kiss that followed made any doubt you had disappear in an instant. He was telling the truth, that much was evident. “Next time, you can just straight up tell me what’s bothering you. Although I have to say, I kind of like it when you’re acting all jealous and cute.”
“Fuck off,” you said, but it was with a smile. You playfully tried to push him off of you, but he buried his face in your neck.
He was stronger than you, and his weight was pressing against you in a way that made it impossible for you to escape. Not that you wanted to - not when his lips had found your neck and left a sensation so new and good that you couldn't help but let out a sigh of contentment.
“I love you,” he said, His voice was so full of affection that it warmed your heart. “Only you. Always you. I won’t be patrolling with her as much in the future, I promise.”
At times, you wondered how someone as great as him had ended up with someone like you. The room was bathed in the warm glow of the afternoon sun. His eyes shimmered with an amber-like hue; the smile that graced his face was a breathtaking image.
He appeared radiant in the sunlight, and in his presence, you felt a profound sense of peace and trust overcome you.
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afyrian · 1 month
Note
Hello!! Can i request 📸🍓 with Kenma please??🥺
Hope you have a great day<3
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kitten photography w/ kenma | wc: 262 m.list | prompt: photographer + 'oh my gosh you can't just say that!'
    “sit up, if you keep laying down i’m not going to get anything good for the shoot,” you purse your lips, looking around your camera and meeting kenma’s gaze.
  his fingers are intertwined with a kitten’s tail, the soft fur running along his knuckles. rolling his eyes, kenma looks back to the kitten, his hair cascading to the white backdrop you acquired. letting out a short sigh you wonder if working with him is something you actually want to do. you’ve known him so long and you love him but he’s so infuriating to work with. 
  “kenma.. i will leave this room and tetsuro will never buy you breakfast again, i’ll make sure of it,” you quickly rest your hands on your hips.
  “my god! you can’t just say that, his breakfast runs are the only things keeping me going,” kenma leans his head back to look at you again, his lips curled into a somewhat amused smile. 
  tapping your foot against the ground, one eyebrow raised in what could only be described as a disappointed look. “i can definitely tell, you don’t seem like the type to be able to pick up their own breakfast,” you watch as he finally sits up, holding the young kitten in his arms. 
  “i wake up late!”
  “and you also don’t know how to pose for photos,” you joke, finally convincing him to sit up and give you more poses for the shoot. he almost never listens to you.. but missing the breakfasts he’s too tired to get is more than enough of a reason. 
a/n: thank you anon!! gen. taglist (open): @eggyrocks @causenessus @applepi25 @softpia
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hiramaris · 1 year
Text
Kiss It Off Me
CHAPTER 1
Summary:
A story revolving around the newly arrived resident farmer in the eyes of the personified perfection, the sunflower of Pelican Town herself, Haley. Or. When Haley finally met the person that caused ripples in what was once a stagnant town, and she didn’t know how to handle such massive change.
Pairings: Haley x Fem!farmer
Notes:
Haley's heart events are just soooo wifey, especially after marriage. Her character development is well written off but I just can't help but notice that something is missing, like the heart events are just not that connected in some way. Stardew is an absolute gem don't get me wrong. I'd like to try and connect what I think is missing which is the reason this fic is created. P.S. Second try in making fanfiction. I apologize for any future grammatical errors or whatever. English is not my primary language.
Disclaimer:  I do not own Stardew Valley or any of the related characters. Stardew Valley is created by and owned by ConcernedApe. This fanfiction is intended for entertainment only. I am not making any profit from this story. All rights of the original Stardew Valley story belong to ConcernedApe.
Warning: None so far? Just Haley being her usual self
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Gif from reddit.com
Winter 25
Immobile.
Stagnant.
Bland.
What words could possibly do justice to describe this sleepy town? Pelican Town had its charms sure. It’s peaceful, the air is fresh, and would never choke you on your sleep plus it gives a really nice tan so Haley wouldn’t really complain. 
But it was just so... boring. Was that the right term?
The people are meh, nosy, and just as bland but they are good neighbors though don't get her wrong. They look after them— her and Emily when their parents can’t. 
Ugh.
Them again. Thinking about them just makes her angry— blood boiling and all that, and well… sad which is infuriating.
How can you just leave your kids just to go follow your own dreams and travel? And then act like you care just by sending some half-hearted letter? Sending a letter now and then was hardly enough to make up for their absence. How low could that be?
Emily doesn’t think so. But what does she know? Her cooking was as bland as the town, and her obsession with crystals and hippie clothes was just plain ridiculous. She knows nothing. 
Her sister is anything but pessimistic. She saw the light in everything whereas Haley ever saw them through the lens of her camera.
Capturing a single moment in a photograph was a thousand times more vivid and alive than the bleak and colorless reality she was currently living in.
She should be in college right now, pursuing her dreams, being the center of attention, and having boys falling over themselves to impress her. Or she would have been running her own photography studio by now in a city that never sleeps, schmoozing with some famous photographers and carving a niche for herself in the cut-throat world of photography.
But no, because here she was, stuck in a six-mile drive from the nearest city, life as directionless as the people in here.
Why am I even staying here? She wonders.
Oh, yeah— grandma.
This house is hers. Her house is the only thing that made her feel that Grandma is still here, with them. Even though Haley is talking big about leaving this town, she knew to herself that she doesn’t have the strength to just leave it just like that. Which is why they both tried to keep it tidy and well... avoiding it from falling apart.
Aside from that, there was nothing to do here. The only things keeping her sane were her camera, her phone, and the clothes she ordered online.
Oh, and of course, her best friend, Alex.
He's the only one— aside from Emily and of course, the Mullner residence, Granny and George are good people even though George is grumpy all the time,  that she's able to have a decent conversation. She and Alex are, after all, not the sharpest tool in the shed, and shared almost the same brain cell.
He’s that typical jock boy, ripped as hell but in terms of brain, well… meh. Not like Haley's any better so who is she to judge?
They went to the same school, belonged to the same clique, and were both popular, of course. He’s here to practice his grid ball or whatever but Haley knew better.
Alex, despite being the dungus that he is, has a lot on his plate already. He needs the peace this town can offer.
And maybe, maybe I need it, too.
Maybe being away from the city has a good cause, despite her constant complaints, this town has been her home for the past six years after all.
But she just really couldn’t help but dwell on this stupid thought of hers of being stagnant and directionless at this time of the year.
Winter.
Ugh. It’s stupidly cold outside and there’s no way she’s walking in six-inch snow just to get a quality photo, which isn’t much considering the lighting outside does not satisfy her at all. The only, and probably one good thing about winter is peppermint coffee. It's hot, minty, and makes her feel warm while making her mouth worthy of being sucked on— err... that's a want that cannot be sated as of the moment.
The bachelors in this town suck for real. They are not even worthy of a single glance. Apart from Alex, of course, but he's a friend so... no.
And what's made it double suck is that she ran out of peppermint coffee. Pierre is out of stock and there's no way she'll let herself be caught alive inside that creep manager's store that runs Joja or whatever. 
Now she's stuck sitting at the table, devouring a massive pink cake that could feed an entire family, enduring a coffee so bland it makes her want to try and drink tea.
She hates tea.
Oh yeah, she's also holding a note and a sunflower in her other hand. 
She doesn't want to read the letter but considering the gifts she just received, it’s probably just the same lame-ass apology about being unable to be here on her birthday this coming Spring 14th. Not that it mattered anymore; it had been two years of absence, and she had grown used to it by now.
With a flick of her wrist, she tossed the note onto the table, debating whether to toss it into the fireplace or tear it to shreds or whatever.
If it's just another excuse, she doesn’t want to hear it.
"Haaaay!" And there's a familiar voice. 
"If you don't have peppermint coffee with you I swear to Yoba—"
"What's the case, long face?" he quipped. "And no, I don't have anything with me."
She looked up from her cake, finding Alex strolling in their kitchen with one of his shit-eating grins, hair covered with a concerning amount of snow. She grimaced. "Sometimes I wonder why I'm friends with you."
He feigned a hurt expression. "I thought you loved me though."
"According to gossip, maybe but really, I don't," she deadpanned. 
He cackled at the mention of that. At the center of the gossip mill passing down from Marnie, Jodi, and Caroline, maybe Robin, too, and probably all the yoga club, is he and Haley dating. Which was absurd, to be honest.
"No, really, Hay." He finally turns serious. "What's up? What's got your face looking like that?" 
"It's just the stupid climate." Haley tried to lie. She didn't want to stir up drama at the moment. Alex frowned, catching up with her lie almost immediately. He caught sight of the letter Haley threw earlier. "Alex don't—"
Too late. He already got it. He sat down next to her as he read the contents of the note, his brows furrowing in what she assumes is annoyance. "Parents, huh? Same old, same old?" He raised an eyebrow.
Haley huffed and snatched the letter away. "Yes, the usual."
"Well." Alex propped his elbow on the backrest, a sly grin returning to his face. "I just got the perfect news that might take your mind off things."
Haley arched a perfect eyebrow, curious. Gossip wasn't his usual forte.
"Spill." 
"A new farmer is coming to town."
Haley's fork paused in mid-air. "Uh... I'm not sure how to react to that, and what's so great about it?"
His smile widened. "I heard she's from Zuzu City."
"I'm sorry, what?" 
"Why? Surprised another Zuzu native is coming here?"
"No, you dungus." She slapped his hand attempting to take a slice of her cake. "I heard you correctly, right? You said the farmer's a she? A girl is taking over that farm?"
"Yes," Alex confirmed, finally snagging a bite of cake. Haley makes a scrunched face in mock disgust. "The farmer's a she. Old man Railey's granddaughter actually. What's the problem though?" he asked in mouthfuls.
Haley stood up to grab another spoon. No way she's getting his imaginary cooties. Alex doesn't seem to mind; it only further encourages him to eat some more.
"Because it’s weird," she said as she sat down. "Farming isn't exactly a girl's job, especially for a city girl like her. I bet you she wouldn't last a month."
"Not all girls are like you, Hay— ow! What's that for?!" He rubbed his ribs where Haley just nudged with her boniest elbow of all time.
"As I was saying before being rudely interrupted." She rolled her eyes. "Farming is all dirt and nasty, smelly clothes. That farm was barely run by old man Railey before he died. What could possibly a city girl like his granddaughter could do with that rundown farm? I bet you it’s already smoldering by now."
"Good point," Alex said as he continued eating. Haley swear to Yoba all this idiot does is eat and relax in here.
He has a diet, right? So does she, and they're like eating a fat block of sugar right now.
Whatever. Pink cake has always been an exemption from all her seasonal dietary plans.
"But I guess we'll have to wait and see; don't you think so?" Alex turned to her after a few moments of silence. "I heard she's around our age. If it's true that farming is as difficult as they say, the least we can do is make her feel welcomed."
Haley barely nods in acknowledgment. 
This town is like a pond, where everything that enters stays and everyone already there remains. The city is a raging storm with ocean waves ready to swallow you if you go against the flow. A lot of people there has a sense of direction, one Haley aspires to have, and what Pelican lacks. You can't, at all costs, be still and unmoved and some people just couldn't do that.
And those people who couldn't stand the pressure, come here, like a moth drawn to a flame, seeking the mundanity Pelican Town could offer them. Perhaps they have grown weary of the constant hustle and bustle. Maybe city life has been too much. Maybe modern life has been too much for this farmer.
Who knows?
But one thing Haley doesn't like, and what keeps her unmoved and still, is change. Adapting, and adjusting isn't meant for her. It took years before she could finally settle a lifestyle in this town, and another two years of adjustment when her parents decided it would be a good idea to abandon them and go travel. She knew where to go, where townspeople go just so she could avoid interacting with them, she accustomed herself to their culture, and the perfect spots for taking pictures. She has it all memorized and planned out perfectly.
And this farmer will be an anomaly to her perfectly (not as perfect as she thought) crafted routine. New face, a new attitude, and just an overall new person she might be obligated to talk to for the sake of introduction.
Pelican is a stagnant pond, yet this farmer, this alien to her world, she's not yet even here but she is already starting to cause ripples.
And Haley doesn't know what to think of it.
~~~~~
Next
Notes:
The title was inspired by Cigarettes After Sex' Kiss it off me. Their songs are such *chef's kiss* and whilst I was listening to this song, it kind of, sorta, reminded me of how my farmer sees her wife. Thus kabooOm this fic is born
Edit: Because I'm procrastinating and I made sure to finish off my other story first, I decided now to transfer this story from Ao3 to Tumblr
470 notes · View notes
sundrop-writes · 9 months
Text
Your First Kiss With Jason Todd
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Jason Todd x Gender Neutral Reader
Summary:
Jason always thought he hated you. He did hate you.
Until he didn't.
Until his love for you ruined him in ways he couldn't even imagine.
Jason Todd x Gender Neutral Reader. Frenemies to Lovers. Pure Angst (Hurt, No Comfort). Set during Season 3.
Word Count: 8,200
DC Titans Masterlist | AO3 Link
Detailed warnings and author's notes below the cut.
Warnings: This fic is almost entirely angst - hurt, no comfort. This fic does not have a happy ending!!! So be warned of that before you enter here. Jason and the reader are described as ‘hating’ each other, but they are more like frenemies/annoyances - they have a playful banter (at the time, even they don’t know that they like arguing because it’s sexual tension and passion for each other); the reader is completely gender neutral - the only pronouns used for the reader are you/yours; this is mostly written from Jason’s POV (which is where most of the angst comes from); Jason describes himself as a ‘zombie’ or ‘half-alive’ - but he is fully alive and has all of his mental faculties, he is just freaked out about the fact that he was resurrected; the reader does not have any meta powers, but is described as being very good at combat (this does not denote the reader’s body type); mentions of sex and some sexual themes - but there is no outright smut and no detailed descriptions of sex; mentions of negative stereotypes surrounding frat boys/frat houses - including STDs and group sex (mentioned in a negative light); mentions of Jason masturbating (and thinking about the reader while doing it); mentions of Jason’s canon trauma (being kidnapped and tortured by Deathstroke, dropped off the building); mentions of Jason being killed by the Joker (and being ressurected by Crane); mentions of the reader mourning Jason’s death; mentions of drugs and drug addiction (based around the canon storyline of the anti-fear gas); mentions of Jason’s trauma surround his mother’s drug addiction; mentions of Jason killing Hank (as in the canon); the reader is kidnapped (by Crane or someone who works for Crane) and held hostage, and later rescued by Jason; somewhat graphic descriptions of violence (Jason beating up Crane, other background instances), gory descriptions of a death toward the end (mentions of acid burns and choking on non-breathable air); major character death - the reader character does die. Like I said - no happy ending. Sorry not sorry.
A/N: This is set during Season 3 - and this does feature spoilers for Season 3 if you haven't seen Titans before. So if you wanna watch the show spoiler free, definitely avoid this fic. I was imagining this to be set around episode 6 or episode 7, before Crane's plan to use the ice cream factory is taken down by the Titans, but obviously Jason breaking away from Crane's control so early goes against the canon - so there's that. Also, if you wanna pair some music with this for something truly heartbreaking, I would highly recommend the classic Running Up That Hill by Kate Bush, or the highly underrated Colorado Sunrise by 3OH!3 (the lyrics are way more depressing than people realize, and I love it as a whump song. oomf). I also feel like the song Cloud 9 by Beach Bunny would go so well with this fic, but in like - the most devastating way. I haven't written something this cruel since I wrote Ghosting and I had so much fun doing it. You can't leave me alone with whump for too long, I turn into a monster. I need to go back to smut again quickly lmao.
...
Jason Todd was in love with you. 
It was something that he hated himself for. Actually, it was one of the most infuriating, devastating facts in the world. But it was true. You were someone who was so entirely amazing. You were beautiful - literally the hottest person Jason had ever met who wasn’t photoshopped or catered to be some unrealistic daydream. You were clever and smart and strong. You could kick anybody’s ass on any day of the week and still have enough energy left to tell them how much of an idiot they were and list all of the reasons why. 
And you would definitely never love Jason back. There wasn’t a snowball’s chance in hell that he could ever have someone like you. 
So he kept all of that stupid, idiotic love to himself. It was a secret that he had sworn to die with - and technically, he already had. 
Jason tried not to linger on the very fucked up, seemingly impossible fact that he had come back from the dead. And now he was existing as some weird, fucked up zombie thing - resurrected from having his skull caved in by the Joker to do Jonathan Crane’s bidding. This definitely wasn’t what Jason would have wanted out of a renewed life - but hey: when an Arkham prisoner gives you rotten lemons. 
When Jason wasn’t beating down drug dealers, stealing money, or strapping bombs to people - when he was trying his hardest not to focus on the fact that he had died and he was now living some strange half-life, reliant on Crane’s drugs, he was thinking about you. He thought about you a lot. 
He hadn’t come into contact with you since his strange foray back into the land of the living. That was probably for the best. He knew that you had freshly come back to Gotham, upon Dick’s request. Nightwing had called for backup from all the ex-Titans to help end Red Hood’s reign of terror. Jason wanted to stay as far away from you as possible. 
Genuinely, he didn’t want you getting caught in the crossfire of whatever Crane was planning. He wished you had stayed out of Gotham, but he knew that you were too loyal, too good not to come to the aid of the Titans when they needed you. He couldn’t reveal himself to you just for a taste of nostalgia - one last argument before you sold him down the river for good. But fuck - he thought about you a lot. 
When the two of you had first met, you were the last person he ever thought that he would surrender that stupid, soft label of love to. Even months into first knowing you - he would have said that he hated you. He would have told anybody that he found you to be the most annoying person on earth. 
Your relationship used to be the worst kind of dance. 
Every single time that Jason opened his mouth, you said something to contradict him. To a point, he believed that you didn’t even fully stand behind the things you said - you just enjoyed arguing against him. That you did it for sport. You used every single last bit of your time and energy to get under his skin. From mocking him to calling him a fuckboy to prodding at his grammar, poking holes in his points by smugly correcting him. He always found you to be the most infuriating person in any room. But it seemed that the more frustrated he got with you, the more cool headed you remained. 
He tried to mock you back, and you shrugged it off. Every time he became visibly annoyed in your presence - you giggled. He wanted to strangle you. 
And it was one fated day that he realized the line between heat fueled by frustration and heat fueled by lust truly weren’t that different. 
… 
“Jason! I thought I smelled you coming down the hall!” 
Jason groaned when he heard you make this comment. 
He thought that for once, he could have some peace to train alone - but it appeared that he would have no such luck. You were already in the training room, holding a long bo-staff as you ran some drills. Apparently, you were eager to exercise your mouth too - already whipping off clever insults the minute that Jason entered the room. 
When all he could muster was a glare in your direction, you let out a giggle. His blood boiled. 
“Between that god awful Axe body wash and that alcohol based aftershave that you like to drown yourself in, you smell like a walking frat house.” You continued, blabbering on even though Jason had made no efforts to engage you. At least not yet. “Just throw in some Busch Light and weed, and I might be able to catch gonorrhea just from the stench.” 
That was the nerve that hooked Jason into the conversation. First of all - he smelled fucking delightful. He always made hygiene one of his personal priorities. He was absolutely not one of those guys with crusty, sweaty balls. And second of all - he was not one of those STD spreading manwhores. He was clean in all senses. He always used a condom. 
“Sounds like you’ve got experience with that.” Jason quipped back. 
He looked to you for some kind of reaction, some inkling that he had gotten under your skin even a fraction of the way that you did his. His movements were rough with annoyance as he began wrapping his knuckles with tape so he could have a few rounds with the heavy bag - mostly out of a need to pound out his frustration on something. He was getting too angered with your presence in the room and not wanting to snap and take it out on you. (He already had enough on his record with Bruce, and despite popular opinion - he was trying to improve.) 
When you weren’t quick to respond, Jason continued. 
“You used to letting frat boys all over you? You seem like the type of person who would enjoy a good, sloppy frat house train. Twenty guys, one after the other, none of them knowing your name, just because you’re so needy for a good fuck.” 
Jason grinned, feeling like he had won this conversation with the essence of shock alone. 
But no. As always, you remained cool. You grinned right back at him, stepping toward him, crowding into his personal space as you said your next words in a low, smooth voice. 
“Sounds like you spend an awful lot of time picturing me running a train.” You smirked. “Is that why you’re always so late getting up in the morning? You wake up and the first thing you do is get a hand on your dick, imagining me getting fucked by a lineup of guys? Probably just wishing that one of them was you.” 
Jason’s face fell flat. 
You were so strikingly confident in your words that it made his stomach twist. Facing him down, speaking such filthy words without flinching - embarrassment and heat collided inside of him. Even more so with what you did next. 
You put a hand out in front of your crotch, mimicking the motions of jacking off while you mocked him in a broken voice. 
“Oh, oh fuck Y/N! Come on! Take my sloppy, frat house cock!” 
You then mocked a whiny series of moans that must have been Jason’s fake orgasm - and while Jason’s insides bubbled with a confusing heat, you quickly dissolved off into laughter. 
“Shut up.” Jason snapped, forcing his eyes down to focus on the process of taping himself up - praying that you wouldn’t see the heat that had spread across his cheeks. “You’re the fucking worst.” 
“Only when I’m with you.” You replied, blowing him a kiss - to which he stuck his middle finger up at you. 
He was eternally thankful when you went back to your own training in silence, only taking occasional glances up in his direction. 
… 
After that point, Jason had to admit to himself that he was attracted to you, at the very least. He could no longer deny that you were insanely attractive; you were a very, very hot person. And somehow, even past your annoying habits, he was being drawn into the orbit of your gorgeous looks and your wonderfully cocky, filthy mouth. 
But he still hated you. He definitely still hated you. 
He hated it even more when you became right - and you did become the object of some of his more heated fantasies. He became downright annoyed at the times he had his hand around his cock and imagined himself hate fucking you - imagined forcing every cocky retort out of your mouth, imagining you breathless and needy beneath him, begging for more with every hard push of his hips. 
He hated how everything changed after Doctor Light. 
Jason wasn’t thinking about your stupid beautiful cocky mouth after that. His mind was full of glass and he was being shredded from the inside out. He came home broken. After everything that happened with Deathstroke and Doctor Light - he was some fragile bird; some chewed up, used, pitiful thing. He didn’t have the energy to fight you anymore, not even for sport. 
So after he was rescued, still floating in numbness, he didn’t know what to do when you burst into his room unannounced. You practically shoved the door off its hinges, and stormed across the room toward him - tears hot in your eyes. You pounded curled fists against his chest, screaming at the top of your lungs. Half of your words were static in his ears, but the tone of your voice pierced through his heart like an arrow. You called him stupid, asking where in his empty head he had gotten the idea to go off by himself. 
Jason didn’t have it in him to fight you. So he broke down. 
He felt like the world’s biggest idiot for crying in front of you. But his throat was tight and he choked on the tears - he was too tired. He just couldn’t hold them back. He screamed back, and asked you to lay off. To get off his fucking back. 
You looked shocked. Like you had swallowed a piece of glass. 
You surprised him when you uncurled your fists and wrapped the most tender, gentle hands around his back, and for the first time since he had known you - you embraced him in a hug. He was weak and he needed it more than he was willing to admit, so he let you. He sobbed against your neck, his own cries too loud that he missed the timid sound of your apology. 
That wasn’t the only time you surprised him that week. 
He knew it was because he was some broken little bird, but you started taking care of him. You brought him plates of food without being asked, and when he attempted to shove them away - you refused. You told him to eat before you had to ‘shove it down his fucking throat’. 
You didn’t mock him. You didn’t correct him. And you surprised him even more when you turned the sharpness of your tongue on the others when they tried attacking Jason. They accused him of planting booze in Hank’s room or drawing crosses on Rachel’s mirror to fuck with her, among other things. And you popped veins in your neck going on a winding rant about how stupid and baseless their accusations were. 
Jason wasn’t sure if you knew it, but you jumping to his defense wrapped him in a blanket of protection that he had never before felt. It was so entirely strange, but welcomed coming from you. Especially because he knew that it was genuine. He knew that you didn’t have any ulterior motives for doing this - for some reason, you just wanted to help him. 
When you extended an invitation toward him to come with you as the group dispersed, torn apart by Dick’s nasty, festering secret - Jason felt welcomed by you. He knew that the dynamic between the two of you was changing at a breakneck speed, and he had to embrace it. He found himself eager to follow the weird, newly developing kinship that he had with you rather than wanting to stay in the empty coldness of the Tower with a brooding Dick. 
From there, it was really difficult for Jason to pin down the exact moment that his feelings transitioned toward you from casual lust to something more. He couldn’t tell exactly when it turned into that panic-inducing, ‘oh my god, I’m fucked’ feeling of being in love. After leaving San Francisco, during the entirety of the time that the two of you were in Gotham together, your relationship remained completely platonic. 
It was a few short weeks spent kicking ass as the best vigilante duo the city had ever seen, but there wasn’t a single moment Jason could point to where the two of you lit up with that romantic spark. It wasn’t some romcom bullshit come to life. It was just the two of you being friendly for once. The two of you helping each other survive. 
Back then - Jason wanted you, badly. Even if he didn’t know just how badly, he wasn’t going to fuck up the whole dynamic just to get laid. He felt safe with you. He kicked ass with you. He was good with you. And during that short time - he was happy. So he wasn’t going to do anything to risk that happiness. Happiness was too rare for him. So why the hell would he try putting the moves on you, scare you away, and fuck it all up? 
… 
A little slice of that happiness came in the form of Hal’s Diner. It was a place in downtown Gotham, open twenty four hours, and you and Jason had gotten into the habit of stopping there after your patrols. 
The two of you would kick some ass - break the legs of some drug dealers, make sure that women got home safe if they were walking late at night, keep the streets a little safer. And then you would change out of your patrol outfits and head to the diner, just as the sun was rising over the scummy streets of Gotham. You would get breakfast and Jason would get dinner. He would steal one of your eggs and you would take half his burger, and you would always comment about him putting way too much ketchup on his plate. 
It was harmony. 
“You know, every time I see you make a grown man cry, it brings me such intense joy.” Jason grinned as he said this, reminiscing about a beautiful moment from earlier in the night. 
He spoke about it in the same manner that someone might reminisce about seeing a relative or a cute puppy. But this was natural for the two of you - since you had taken up vigilantism as a duo, violence was a sweet art for the two of you. 
“Well, if he would have left that girl alone the first time I asked, I wouldn’t have broken his arm.” You shrugged, speaking very casually about it yourself. 
You then picked a piece of bacon up off your plate and took a bite, grinning at Jason fondly. You did appreciate it when he complimented your skills. 
Jason chuckled. 
“You know, it is nice to see you using your powers for good instead of evil.” He commented. 
“My powers?” You parroted back, your mouth half busy with chewing, your words slightly muffled. 
You didn’t have any metahuman powers, so this comment did leave you slightly confused. 
“Yeah.” He nodded, entirely confident in the statement he had to follow. “Your endless amount of energy to harass people and be endlessly annoying. The powers you used to spend all your time using on me.” 
“You used to deserve it.” You were quick with your tongue as usual, not missing a beat with this statement. 
Jason’s only rebuttal was to pick up a french fry - one not doused in ketchup - and throw it at your head. You flinched slightly when it bounced off your forehead - but when it landed in your lap, you easily picked it up and put it in your mouth, not thinking twice about doing so as you tossed Jason a wicked grin. 
That. That must have been the moment. 
That was the moment he realized that he was truly in love with you. You grinning at him from across the table, your smile lighting up your whole face, playing around with him like he actually made you happy. Like he could spend the rest of his life making you happy. 
That’s why it hurt so much more when your phone buzzed on the table a few minutes later. When you told him that it was the Titans - Gar in trouble. That’s why it hurt so fucking much when you left. 
Jason knew, in hindsight, that he should have gone with you. But he flailed like a rabbit caught in a snare, and rather than just agreeing with you, he felt the trap tightening around him, and he opted to chew off his own foot rather than simply letting you help him free. 
He stupidly argued that it was some test from Dick. That the Titans could deal with their own problems. Jason knew that deep down, he was still tender from everything that had happened - Dick dropping him, even by accident. The accusations, the secrets. The rejection. He felt like he was laying down a line - he was letting you make a choice. 
Him or the Titans. 
But it shouldn’t have been a choice. It was Gar. Jason should have stood by his friend. He should have gone with you. 
Deep down, Jason feared that if he did go with you - the Titans wouldn’t want him back. He feared another cutting rejection. They would simply bench him again, they wouldn’t even need him to help save Gar. They wouldn’t want him to help. He was useless, after all. He was careless and stupid. That was why he needed you to choose him. To stay. 
That was what his mind was screaming out as you looked at him, disappointment flooding your eyes as you questioned him about Gar, about going back to the Titans. 
Stay. He silently begged. Pick me. 
And watching you snatch up your jacket in a huff and get up from the table, your food barely touched - his eyes boring into your back as you retreated - it was like having his heart carved out of his chest. And because he was so fucked up, he just sat there. He couldn’t bring himself to do anything about it. He didn’t chase you. 
He let you go. 
Having you suddenly disappear from his life was like missing a limb. Jason was constantly aching around your non-presence, constantly missing you. He felt torn up from the inside out, wondering if his frayed nerve endings would ever heal themselves. When he went to Donna’s funeral, he stared at you from across the tarmac - telling himself that if you even so much as glanced in his direction, he would cross that sickly one hundred foot black sea and talk to you. He would make the leap and apologize. 
But you were fettered and stubborn and you kept your head straight. You knew it was the ultimate punishment not to acknowledge him. So the moment that the plane took off, Jason shoved on his helmet and sped off on his bike.
He easily became numb after that. 
He went back to Bruce - to lay low and lick his wounds, or because it was the only place he knew, he wasn’t sure. He tried to be a Robin that wasn’t with you. It didn’t work. He felt more broken than ever. It was cheesy, pathetic bullshit - but he talked about you in therapy. Leslie encouraged him to reach out to you, but every time Jason’s fingers hovered over your contact in his phone, his hands shook, and all he remembered was the look of pure scorn you had given him before you snatched up your things and left the diner that day. 
He thought of you as he suited up to go after the Joker. He considered how easy it would be for the two of you to take down the stupid clown together - how flawlessly the two of you worked as a team. 
Jason thought of you as he drew his last breath, soaked in blood and struggling past the world-ending pain. He wondered, in a haze, if you were warm in your bed in The Tower while he was pressed into the cold ground, taunted by the laughter that rung in his ears. 
… 
Jason didn’t know how hard you cried for him when you heard the news of his death. 
You wouldn’t have dared to say that the hole in the middle of your chest was caused by love - caused by the heartbreak of a lover being stolen. But you certainly felt robbed when you heard that the Joker had killed him. You seethed and you heavily considered marching toward Gotham to seek revenge. 
You knew that Dick was angry with Bruce for finally giving in to what the Joker wanted and killing him. For finally ending their sick, twisted game. But when you found out - you were glad that the clown was dead. You wrapped one of Jason’s stolen shirts around your pillow, and you slept a bit easier at night. 
Jason knew that he should have left town. 
Crane claimed that Red Hood was going to be the next Batman - that he was going to be something the Bat never could. That he was going to actually keep the streets safe. But so far, all Jason had done was steal, kill, terrorize, torture. Crane spoke of omelets and breaking eggs - pigs and bacon, and ‘marketing’ himself to the public. But truly, it never made any real sense to Jason. 
Jason knew that now, he was the type of man lurking in the night whose arm you would have broken if he was lingering too closely to the vulnerable. And you would have been right for doing so. 
Jason was tired. He felt lost - directionless. He was getting tired of Crane’s bullshit. He missed you. But he knew that he couldn’t just go running back to you. You likely wouldn’t have accepted him back into your life if he did. 
When Crane called him in that night, wanting to discuss ‘the game plan’ - Jason was worn. His patience for all of it was already wearing thin, and what happened next - it truly caused him to snap. 
Jason showed up in full gear, wearing the costume of an alias he no longer believed in; foolishly dressed up as someone he had truly begun to resent. He was holding his helmet in hand, his heavy boots clunking on the floor as he dodged around Crane’s egghead lackeys - a random group of people who were working to convert the anti-fear gas into a larger batch. He knew that they were aiming to get more and more people in the city hooked; if Jason hadn’t abandoned his morals in this new life, he might have cared more about the consequences. 
Instead, he made a B-line for Crane, who was typing away at something on the computer. 
“Jason, my boy!” Crane grinned at him, giving a false, performative grin over his shoulder. “Lovely evening, isn’t it?” 
“What do you want?” Jason asked, his tone flat. 
He was far too tired of Crane to engage in more word play or stupid riddles. 
“Never one for pleasantries, are you?” Crane chuckled. 
Jason didn’t offer him a reply - seemingly confirming his theory with this simple act. 
Truthfully, he wasn’t. He wasn’t feeling very pleasant today. He hadn’t felt very pleasant any day since he had been so rudely pulled from the morgue and zombified to do someone else’s bidding against his will. Being an undead puppet didn’t really make a person all that pleasant. 
Crane reached into the pocket of his oddly quaint grandpa sweater and pulled something out - a small glass vial, containing some clear liquid. It looked harmless - like water. But Jason knew Crane, and he knew that whatever it was must have been entirely dangerous if Crane was carrying around such a small dose of it. 
“Do you know what this is?” He asked, giving the vial a small shake, jostling the liquid inside to emphasize his point. 
Jason hesitated before he shook his head in the negative. He hated to appear clueless and stupid around such an intelligent man, but he didn’t want to guess and be wrong. He knew that being misinformed around Crane was dangerous. But being cocky and pretending to know more than Crane was even more dangerous. 
“This is a very highly concentrated form of liquid Methadone.” Crane explained. “It’s a highly addictive substance. And I think it’s going to give the mass market version of your formula that little extra kick that it needs, ya know? Keep the people coming back for more!” 
He let out a bright chuckle, as though he was talking about a cleaning product that was marketed on an infomercial or some kind of great recipe for soup. That was one of the things that scared Jason the most about Crane - his ability to talk about life changing, deadly things with such jarring enthusiasm. He truly thought of bringing people their worst nightmares and their most painful deaths as ‘beautiful work’. 
“What about it?” Jason prodded quietly. 
He knew that Crane hadn’t called him here just to brag about a new idea to add something to the formula. He needed Jason for something. 
Jason just hoped that he wasn’t looking to use him as a guinea pig again. He would likely rather die again than go down the path of heavy drugs. One thing he had vowed - he wouldn’t end up like his mother. 
“Well, you see, my boy, that’s where you come in.” Crane grinned at him. “Due to its highly addictive qualities, Methadone is also a highly regulated substance. But because I am the wonderfully well-connected man that I am, I happen to know that there is a very large stash of it just sitting there, ripe for the taking, in this quaint little building uptown.” 
Jason’s gut stirred with suspicion. 
“Where uptown?” He asked. 
“Well, it’s just-” Crane stuttered, and then sighed, deciding to get it out and over with. “The Wayne Memorial Cancer Research Facility.” 
Jason glared at him. 
“But see, it’s fine! Because I happen to know someone who knows their way around the Wayne Tech security systems very well. So Red Hood breaks in there, gets me my-” 
“No.” Jason said flatly, before he turned and started to walk away. “Find somebody else. We’re done.” 
Crane had threatened to replace him before. Crane had no-so-subtly threatened to kill him alongside being replaced. Maybe that was a good thing. Maybe Jason would be better off dead. Maybe Crane would find out that Jason was irreplaceable after all. Maybe Jason was a dirty, seedy criminal shaped by life for only one thing: ruining the lives of others. If Jason couldn’t do that, he wasn’t sure what he would do. 
But he wasn’t going to fucking do this. 
Killing was one thing. Stealing from drug dealers and mobsters was another. What he had done to Hank had crossed too many lines - but it didn’t even begin to approach the lines that this crossed. 
Stealing from a facility that Thomas and Martha had set up when Bruce was just a child, shitting all over their legacy, using skills that Bruce had taught him in order to do it? That was too far. Jason couldn’t say that he had morals anymore, but he still had that voice of common decency in the back of his head yelling at him to stop it. Maybe it was your voice, correcting him at every turn the way you used to. 
He should listen to that voice. 
He should leave town. 
“Hold on, hold on there, Jaybird!” Crane called after him. 
The pure annoyance that the nickname caused was the only thing that stopped Jason. He considered turning around and shooting Crane just to shut him up. 
“See, I think you forget how this works.” The man went off again - talking in that humming tone he always used that made Jason’s ears numb, made his brain switch off. “Every loyal dog gets a treat. A little motivation to get that Pavlovian mind barking in the right direction.” 
Jason turned back around then. 
“Nothing you say ever makes any fucking sense.” He barked out, ready to leave Crane with these as his last remarks before he left Gotham forever. 
But then Crane tapped at a few things on his keyboard and pulled something up on the monitor - a dark, grainy video feed that had Jason squinting his eyes and walking closer to get a better look. 
When Jason was able to truly take in the scene - his stomach dropped. 
It was you. 
You were sitting alone in some anonymous, concrete warehouse - probably in the industrial district of Gotham, if Jason had to guess. Crane didn’t like to keep his insurance policies too far away, he liked to play it close to the vest. You were tied to a chair, duct tape tight over your mouth, very much there against your will. You were looking straight ahead, with the camera angled down from the top corner of the room. Even through the grainy, black and white footage, Jason could see the wetness of tears streaking down your face. 
You were terrified. 
Jason’s helmet clattered to the floor, slipping from his grip as the shock overtook his system. 
For the first time in weeks, fighting through the numbness of the drugs and the hazy shock of his new half-life - he was terrified too. Then he was angry. Rage bubbled up inside of him like a sharp, acidic bile. 
“What the fuck have you done?” Jason growled out, the anger setting his jaw so tight that the words could barely escape between his teeth. 
“I told you - every loyal dog gets a treat.” Crane said, a barely contained glee filtering through his voice as he peered over Jason’s shoulder at your weeping face on the screen. 
He clapped a large hand on Jason’s shoulder, and Jason felt himself nearly choke on his own tongue - so swollen with anger that it barely fit in his mouth. 
“So, go fetch, doggie.” Crane continued. “Go get me what I need. Otherwise, that sweet little treat of yours is gonna play dead.” 
Crane leaned over and whispered those last words into Jason’s ear - and that was what truly caused him to snap. 
In a flash, Jason grabbed the hand that was on his shoulder, whipped Crane around - there was a loud crack as Jason broke Crane’s arm. The egghead types who were working on the formula all paused; some of them gasped or hid behind things, but none of them were brave enough to intervene. Jason shoved Crane’s face into the monitor, cracking it out like a spider’s web but never fully obscuring the image of that dark, cold warehouse - the place where you were alone and terrified. 
He twisted Crane’s broken arm, making a sound like glass grinding in on itself, and the man let out a howl. 
“I think you forget how this works.” Jason barked at him, his voice so dark with rage that it almost sounded like he was wearing Red Hood’s voice modulator even though his helmet was on the floor at Crane’s feet. “When dogs get pissed off - they bite.” 
He twisted the injury again, and Crane let out another bitter howl. 
Jason demanded to know where you were, and Crane squeaked out an address. It was in the industrial district, so it checked out in Jason’s mind. It didn’t seem like a trap or a false answer to waste his time. 
Jason shoved the pathetic, useless man to the ground, kicked him in the gut for good measure, and then leaned down to grab his helmet before shoving it on. He would need it in case Crane had anybody stationed there, guarding you. 
Crane shouted something at him as he walked away, but Jason was barely paying attention - now very singular minded on his mission toward you. 
“You have to learn to play by the rules, Red!” Crane choked out. “You won’t like how this ends! I made you! I fucking made you!” 
… 
Jason was surprised to find the building empty. No guards, seemingly no bombs, no gas canisters. At first, he thought it really was a trick, a misdirect to waste his time. But when he had just about given up hope of finding you, searching one of the back most rooms that used to serve as overflow storage for Ace Chemicals - he found you. Concrete and anonymous, some of the beams having eroded away in places from improper chemical storage. 
When you saw him stalking toward you - his gun drawn, heavy boots thudding against the floor, modulator puffing out heavy, mechanical breaths - you let out a terrified whimper past the duct tape and more tears flowed freely down your face. 
Jason felt a twinge of guilt. Of course. You had no clue it was him. 
Perhaps he could get away with the mercy of never revealing himself to you. He could keep his mask on, release you, drop you back off with the Titans and then leave town. But eventually, Dick would tell you who he was. 
At the very least, he could give you the comfort of seeing a familiar face after the hell you had been through. You were wearing a sweatshirt and simple cotton pants, and running shoes - it looked like you had been plucked off the street during a jogging session. He could only imagine how much Crane’s lackeys had scared you. 
Once he was confident that the area was secure, he holstered his gun and then reached up, removing the face mask from his helmet and tossing it aside. 
“Hey, hey, it’s me.” He told you - attempting to be gentle and soothing in his voice. 
He approached you slowly, not wanting you to be scared as he reached to his belt for a knife - only with the intention to cut the ropes around your torso, wrists, and ankles. 
He watched your expression as you flashed through a range of emotions - deep confusion, a bit of relief, sadness, and then strangely - burning anger. You glared at him with the most intense rage he had ever seen from you - more intense even than the day you had stormed into his room and called him stupid and suicidal for going after Doctor Light without backup. 
Jason was slightly afraid of the lecture that would come next, but nonetheless, he knelt beside you and began cutting you free. 
The minute that one of your hands was free, you reached up and ripped the duct tape off your mouth. You took only a fraction of a second to wince in pain from the tender skin of your lips being disturbed before you began verbally tearing into him. 
“Jason Todd!” You screamed at the top of your lungs, so loudly that Jason was sure some of the edges of the corroded concrete pebbled off and fell down just from this. “Jason fucking Todd! I should have known you had something to do with this!” 
“Wh-?” 
Before Jason could question your odd choice of words or even recognize it as an accusation, you raised your other freshly free hand and slapped him squarely across the cheek - it was a hard, skull-shaking clatter. It had Jason dizzy, falling back onto his ass and dropping the knife before he could finish cutting the ropes around your legs. 
“Fucking ow!” Jason griped, reaching up to grab his now very red cheek. 
“You are such an asshole! Of all the completely idiotic, stupid things you have ever done-” 
“I didn’t fucking kidnap you! Okay? I didn’t do shit!” Jason quickly argued back, finally now realizing that you thought he had put you here in the first place. “I’m here to rescue you!” He said each of these words slowly, looking you in the eyes, hoping that his point would get across more firmly this way. 
There was a tense moment as you stared back at him with your jaw locked. It was likely that if your feet hadn’t still been tied, you would have run away - or kicked him. Jason was thankful that you couldn’t do either at the moment.  
“Why?” You asked, finally breaking the tension. 
“What?” Jason gaped. 
This was the last thing he had been expecting. 
He was saving you - why were you questioning him? 
“Why are you ‘rescuing’ me?” You asked, taunting his phrasing of it with a mocking tone and large air quotes. He now regretted freeing your hands. “So you can bargain me off to Dick for ransom money? So you can put a bomb in my chest?” 
You said the last part with intense disdain, tears dancing in your eyes.
So you did know what a monster he was.  
He was surprised that you hadn’t hit him harder. 
Jason heaved a sigh. He reached over and picked up the knife, very slowly, very tentatively resuming cutting the ropes on your legs to free you. 
“I’m just freeing you so that you can be free. That’s it.” He said quietly, defeat lacing through every inch of his voice. “You don’t deserve this.” 
He cut the last rope and folded the knife, sticking it back in his belt. He stood up then and caught a glimpse of your face - you were wearing the most complex expression he had ever seen. Perhaps confusion, perhaps anger. Maybe somewhere deep in your eyes - hurt. 
He turned and moved to leave, hoping you would simply follow him out of the confusing maze of the building and he wouldn’t have to drag you out kicking and screaming. 
“That’s not an answer.” You told him, your tone sharp and certain - the same tone you always used to correct him. 
Jason whipped back around then, heaving a sigh as he looked at you - standing in the middle of the room now, arms folded over your chest, glaring at him on the spot. Cocky and so sure about yourself. Too damn certain and immobile in your points. Infuriating. 
“Why the fuck do you have to make everything so damn complicated?” Jason shot back, annoyance and dread tight in every inch of him. “Why do you have to interrogate me about every damn thing that I do?” 
“Because you make stupid ass decisions when I don’t.” You easily fired back. “Now tell me: why are you doing this?” 
“Because I wanted to.” Jason huffed. 
“Why?” You prodded again. 
He let out another hot huff, and you didn’t let it go. 
“Come on Jason!” You shouted, increasing in volume as you became more frustrated with his lack of an answer. “You didn’t just develop a conscience all of a sudden! Why did you feel the need to suddenly drop everything and come to my rescue? What makes me different than Hank? What makes me different than-?” 
It was the annoyance grinding on him. It was a combination of your nagging voice, the lack of drugs in his system for the first time in weeks. The rawness of the world ragging on his last good nerve. The sound of your voice putting him in line - exactly where he was supposed to be. The way you reminded him of the truth now more than ever. 
“Because I’m in love with you!” Jason shouted. 
It was almost… angry. It was a declaration that hit you like a whip - more like an insult than something warm and kind. It wasn’t made of sweetness, like some moment from a film with a gentle piano riff wrapped around it. It was real - made of the haunting kind of passion that kept Jason awake at night. 
Your eyes widened. Jason’s breathing stilled as he waited for you to react - to say something. 
“Oh.” Your voice cracked around this syllable, and your eyes danced with more tears. 
Jason felt his own heart crack apart inside of his chest, more terror flooding him. 
He had died with the secret because he had never wanted to live up to the embarrassing vulnerability of confessing it. In the deepest part of his mind, he had lived this horror a thousand times. Him finally creeping out onto the edge of oblivion - speaking those words. Confessing. And then you stabbing him in the heart, rejecting him. 
The reality of it ripped through him so much harder than it ever had in his nightmares. 
Any last tiny piece of his soul that had survived being murdered by the Joker had just been shattered by you. 
“Yeah. Fucking oh.” Jason echoed back, his own tears clutching at his throat. 
Seeing him with that naked vulnerability dancing behind his eyes - it reminded you of the same person who came back from being kidnapped by Doctor Light. It reminded you of the real Jason you had gotten to know. 
In that moment, it all came crashing toward you. You gasped harshly as you could barely breathe around it. 
That hole in your chest had been shaped like a lover - it had been shaped like him. Filled with the pain of letting him get hurt, leaving him alone in Gotham to be murdered by the Joker. Filled with the doubt and confusion of never knowing what could have been between the two of you if you had chased those flirtations a little bit farther. 
And now, he was standing right here in front of you, somehow perfectly alive and well - and there was only one possible thing you could do. 
“Jason.” You gasped out his name, unable to fathom more words. 
Before he could move, you reached out and grabbed both sides of his face, one of them still singed with a burning ache where you had slapped him so hard - and you pulled him into a kiss, hard. 
It wasn’t pretty. It wasn’t dainty or smooth like some Hollywood love confession - it was hungry. Bordering on feral as you both fought to consume more of the other person, bleeding out little moans and fighting for breath past each other’s lips. Jason’s hands rushed to embrace you, wrapping around your back and grabbing a needy, possessive handful of your ass while you kept your grip tight on his face, keeping his face forcefully close to your own as you devoured his mouth. 
You felt some of his tears escape - such a rush of emotions making him raw and unable to hold them back, and you moaned pitifully into his mouth as he wetness slipped underneath your palms. Whatever it was - his pain, his pleasure; you would take it. He was all yours now. 
… 
Far off, on the other side of Gotham, Crane chuckled quietly to himself as he watched the scene unfold. He had pulled up the camera feed on a separate tablet, seeing as Jason had used his head to crack the monitor. With his broken arm bound in a temporary sling, he used his one good hand to pull something out of a drawer - a remote with a single button. 
“For these violent delights have violent ends,” He recited to himself, still grinning widely as he looked at the two lovers in the grainy, black and white footage. “And in their triumph, die like fire and powder. Which as they kiss, consume. Even the sweetest honey is loathsome in his own deliciousness, if the taste confounds the appetite.” Crane poised his finger on the button. “Therefore, love moderately.” 
He pressed down, and dissolved into more epic laughter as he watched what came next. 
… 
You were only human, and you could only kiss Jason for a few minutes before your brain demanded oxygen. As much as you hated to pull away from the sweet, bruising sting of his lips, you forced yourself back and immediately took in a sharp breath that turned into a rolling pant - Jason let out a needy whine in protest. 
With his arms holding you so securely and the dizzying heat now flowing through you - you almost didn’t catch it. But it was there, in the background, something steadily present that wasn’t there before. 
Beeping. A small, electronic beeping. 
“Do you hear that?” You asked Jason, squinting your eyes with confusion and looking around, trying to find the source of the noise. 
He did hear it. 
“Fuck.” Jason mumbled. 
Panic flooded him. The whole thing had been a trap. 
He pulled away from you hesitantly and grabbed his mask up off the ground, snapping it back on. 
“We have to go. Now.” He told you, his voice now sharp and robotic through the voice filter as he grabbed your wrist and began dragging you away - you became limp to his direction for once and simply followed, fear tight in your gut once again. 
Jason didn’t want to consider the possibilities, but he knew it could be anything from a large bomb, meant to tear you to shreds, to a large dose of fear gas waiting to be deployed. And he didn’t have an antidote at the moment. He needed to get you out of the building and transport you to safety. 
When the two of you came to a door - one of the many that Jason had passed through on his way in - it snapped shut in Jason’s face. It was on some kind of mechanical locking system, that much was apparent. Jason rushed forward, trying to pry it open - but it was welded steel, and it wouldn’t budge. 
Jason heard more slamming - more metal forcing itself shut on the same locking system. 
“Jason?” You croaked, that unsure terror back in your voice again. Something so rare for you. You were looking to him for answers. You were looking to him to rescue you. 
Overhead, the last bits of light were shut out - glimpses of the street lights outside - as thick metal shudders collapsed down over the windows. The room was sealing itself shut, becoming air tight. 
“Stand back.” Jason told you, not waiting to see if you followed the instruction before he pulled out one of his guns and began shooting at the door’s heavy metal hinges. He knew it was futile and he feared that one of the bullets might ricochet off and hit you, but he didn’t have many options left. 
Then he heard it. The gentle hissing of gas being released into the air. 
Jason was naive to have hoped that it was Crane’s classic Fear Gas - that would have been a merciful walk in the park compared to what he had planned for you. Betraying Jonathan Crane meant that Jason had to be truly punished. 
Jason turned to you, wrapping his arms around you, as if trying to shield you from the air itself - but it was too late. You began coughing and struggling to breathe, and Jason looked on with confusion as his chest twisted with guilt. 
With his helmet on, he felt nothing. For the first few moments, he didn’t even understand what was going on as you gasped for air, struggling to form a word as you choked on each breath. Jason had no clue what the substance was or how he could fix it, looking on in horror as thick fog clouded around your ankles - your eyes bulging out of your head as you struggled for oxygen. 
“Y/N?” Jason gasped, holding you by both shoulders as you became weaker and leaned on him. “Y/N?” 
You couldn’t answer him. 
You continued to wheeze, your breath hitching against your throat harshly. As the fog reached up to touch your face, it left angry, blistering marks in your skin. Unlike Jason, you had no armor to protect yourself - and somehow, Crane had turned the air itself acidic. Your eyes became wrecked with bloody red streaks and your face swelled as you continued to choke. 
Jason’s insides screamed, but he felt too still. 
As more of the fog touched you, some of the marks on your neck and your cheek blistered more and opened up, bleeding out pinkish bubbling puss as Jason continued to hold you - he didn’t know what else to do. 
All he could do was hold you. 
A harsh foam seeped out of your mouth as you choked on your last half-breath, and Jason felt a stinging pain consuming him - he wasn’t sure if it was the acidic fog finally breaching through his clothing, or the biting pain of having you limp in his arms - dead, as he huddled there on the floor. 
“Come on.” Jason wept, steaming up the inside of his helmet as he recycled back his own breath now. He reached up to your cheek, accidentally skimming off a layer of your marred skin with his gloved thumb as he tried to wipe away some of the teary blood that had leaked from your eyes. “Come on, Y/N. Wake up.” 
Jason simply wept. And he held you. 
As he looked at the camera feed, Crane smiled. 
“This is what happens when you don’t play by the rules, Red.”
...
A/N: SOOOO obviously this ending leaves us with a lot of questions - did Jason survive? I think this can be interpreted one of two ways: one, Jason did live. He managed to escape somehow, and he had scars all over his body from the acidic fog, and he enacted a very vicious, bloody, torturous revenge on Crane before going into hiding forever (or before using Red Hood to give actual justice to innocent people who needed it, his scars always a reminder of who he lost). Or - he sat there in shock and eventually choked to death as well. Or he pulled the whole 'my life is not worth living anymore' thing and just took off his helmet on purpose. So you can imagine that either of those things happened next.
Also, if you didn't catch it (or, if you're not a Saw person) - this situation was heavily inspired by the final plot twist trap in Saw X. I love the acidic fog, and I feel like Crane could be a trap guy. The Titans version of Crane could be good friends with John, imo.
Also, if you enjoyed this fic, check out my DC Titans Masterlist for more of my other fics!! And please consider reblogging and commenting on this fic to tell me what you liked about it.
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hunn1e-bunn1e · 1 year
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Twst Handful - Strong, Understanding, Silly & Teasing Male Reader
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IT'S FINALLY DONE! The reader is described as muscular. The reader is implied to be tall. For Crewel; the reader is the art teacher. For everyone else but Vil; you are in their dorm. For Vil; you're related to Coach Vargas and are in an unspecified dorm. I hope this is what you wanted @kawaistrawberry21! —Benny🐰
                                                                                                   
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🦯 Ugh, you! He can't stand you! Nah, he's just kidding. He likes you just as much as the average coworker by day, lover by night would. Though, he must say, even if he loves you now, he certainly didn't before you both got together.
🦯 The first issue Crewel had was obviously your abhorrent taste in fashion (to him at least) that's what made him dislike you right off the bat. But as any good dog wrangler would say, he cannot judge a pup by its coat alone. So then, with much hesitancy, he got to know you and you hit it off from there.
🦯 Your silliness is... appreciated, to say the least. It's a great distraction for when he's feeling stressed with work. You always know how to make him smile with your little jokes and eccentric attitude. Don't misunderstand though, he values professionalism quite a bit and will tell you to straiten up when he feels that it's needed.
🦯 You want to tease him? Okay. Just be ready when he teases you in return; he was never one to hold back after all. But Crewel's teasing is never the mean spirited kind, that's reserved solely for Vargas. His teasing is sultry in nature, sure to leave you with glowing hot cheeks and swirling thoughts as you fumble for a come back.
🦯 A feature of yours he most definitely enjoys is your immense physical strength. He's surprised that you teach art and not physical education instead of Vargas. Loves watching your muscles flex when you lift things that would seem immovable by the average person's standards. It's not that he dislikes it, but warn him next time you want to pick him up! You're going to give him a heart attack.
🦯 Crewel is really thankful for how understanding you are. You're such a good listener and you give surprisingly wise advice when he goes to you with his problems. He'll let you lay on his lap in the teacher's lounge; stroking your hair as he rants about the misbehaving puppies he had during his last class.
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"You always know how to make me feel better when I'm down, don't you, Puppy. Such a gentleman you are. I suppose you deserve a treat for all your hard work, hm? Alright, here boy."
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🌹 Seven help him, you infuriate Riddle so much. Seriously! Even though you and Yuu helped him with his overblot he still finds you irritating. He doesn't hate you though, he sees you as a good— no, a great friend. A really annoying one, but he supposes that's what makes you yourself, unfortunately.
🌹 You're quite silly, he found that out even before his overblot and at that time he was annoyed by it. Couldn't you be serious for once? The Queen of Hearts's rules are nothing to joke about! But... after his overblot, he really learns to appreciate it. It was you after all who broke the tension in the infirmary when Yuu and the others came to see him; lightening the atmosphere to make room for pleasant conversation.
🌹 The teasing. By the seven, the teasing. Please... give poor Riddle a break, you're going to make him burst a blood vessel with how irritated he gets. Stop calling him short, he gets it already! Yes, his hair is red, now stop calling him the names of red fruit! His head is NOT shaped like an apple, dammit! He's glad if you stop after a while, because if you don't he might start losing hair and you might (read as: most definitely will) lose your magic.
🌹 Just because you're strong doesn't mean you're allowed to throw him over your shoulder like a sack of potatoes whenever you please! It's scary! It's like he's getting kidnapped or something! But your strength is appreciated sometimes. He definitely makes you carry around or move heavy items for him. Maybe the common room furniture needs to be rearranged again.
🌹 Riddle was quite literally moved to tears after you immediately forgave him for his behavior before and during his overblot. You didn't even let him finish telling you about his mother in the infirmary; you just hugged him tightly and said 'I forgive you. I don't need to know your past to understand that you regret your actions. People can change, Riddle.'. He cried. He sobbed. You have no idea how badly he needed to hear that.
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"Call me 'shortstack' one more time and it's off with your head, you hear me! And get your arm off my head! I am not an armrest for you to go and just lean onto, you— you miscreant!"
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🦁 He doesn't pay you too much mind. Your personality is comparable to Ruggie's, and he has no issues with the way Ruggie behaves and does things, so you're cool in his books. Just don't interrupt any of his naps like Ruggie does, or else.
🦁 A silly attitude is something he's used to interacting with giving his attendant and his neffew being the same way. Leona mostly tunes out any jokes you tell him unless they're about Malleus and the Diasomnia dorm, he finds those pretty funny. He likes when you tell him random made up stories as he falls asleep, they usually influence his dreams so he always asks for peaceful ones.
🦁 Oho? You? Teasing him? No, no, no, sweetheart. He's teasing you. Each and every time you attempt to tease him he flips it around on you and makes you a flustered mess. This man is absolutely ruthless with his teasing and won't let up until he's rendered you too embarrassed to even look him in the eye for the next few days. Maybe you should think twice about teasing him next time, yeah?
🦁 You're strong, are you? Say, you wouldn't mind doing Leona a morally questionable favor would you? If you think he wouldn't take advantage of your strength to further his chances of winning Magishift, you're sorely mistaken. But outside of of his schemes, he loves making you carry him to the greenhouse and his bedroom when he doesn't feel like walking.
🦁 One time, when the two of you were just relaxing alone in his room, he shared the details of his past to you. What he got in response was a 'Well, that explains alot.' as well as a tight hug. After that he tells you all about his insecurities and troubles and you just listen and nod. He's thankful for someone who understands him and makes him feel seen for the first time in a long time.
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"Hey Herbivore, you'd better carry me back to Savanaclaw. Consider it your punishment for stepping on my tail again. Shouldn't be a problem for you since you're so strong, right?"
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🍩 You and Ruggie get along pretty well. Sometimes you both meet in the Savanaclaw dorm kitchen and make a meal together or you help him prepare a meal for Leona. Speaking of the lion beastman, you both like to get together and gossip about him. Not in a malicious way of course, but Ruggie always has a full kettle and needs to spill the tea once in a while.
🍩 You're silliness is something he can mesh well with. The both of you are pretty similar in personality anyway, so you definitely get along. You both like to joke around about Leona being your son, with him being the mom and you being the dad. You definitely play pranks on the unsuspecting student body together like partners in crime.
🍩 Ruggie honestly finds your teasing nature to be a breath of fresh air. Being around a grouchy pessimistic person all the time really does a number on his mood after a while. You both partake in playfully teasing one another; never mean spirited and rarely suggestive. You and Ruggie are just here to have fun, why spoil the mood with negativity; that's why Leona's never invited when you guys hang out.
🍩 By the seven, are you strong! Here, carry this; and this; oh, this too. Would you be so kind as to drag Leona to class? Thanks a bunch! To say that he's living for your strength would be an understatement; everything is so much easier now that he can get you to help him. Now hold still and let him get on your shoulders so he can dust the ceiling.
🍩 Dang it stop being so good to him! You're making Ruggie feel bad for injuring all those students! He vents to you about how bad he feels about hurting everyone even if Leona told him to do it. After you express that you don't fault him for following through Leona's orders because he's in no position to refuse, Ruggie jumps on you and damn near sqeezes you to death in a hug.
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"Huh, 'Mister Mom'? My son? I don't got a kid yet, 'm still in school, man. —Oh! Pfft! Shyeehyehehe! Are ya callin' Leona a kid! Awe man, that's friggin' hilarious. I guess I am 'Mister Mom', huh."
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🪞 You... remind him of Coach Vargas for some reason. That's not a good thing. His eyes are burning, please Stop flexing like that, you look like you're constipated. And please, PLEASE for the love of the seven shave your chest hair, he visibly cringes every time your shirt is open. Vil thinks you're very handsome and could do very well in Pomfiore but it's overshadowed by your agregious lack of tact.
🪞 He's well versed in all sorts of mannerisms, so you being silly isn't a shock to him in the slightest. 100% will he try an make you be more serious in situations that can effect his public image, so be prepared for that. Even though he tries not to smile too hard to avoid developing smile creases, you always make him laugh. Stop that! Stop making him so happy, you scoundrel!
🪞 Vil does not like your teasing nature. Whether it be his name, actions or appearance you're teasing him about, he can't stand it. He's already insecure as it is and here you are 'teasing' him as you call it. The only indication of how bothered he is by it is a sharp glare that's usually too fast for you to catch. Seriously, don't tease Vil; friend or not, you'll most likely end up with ipecac in your tea. Don't push your luck.
🪞 Your strength is nothing to scoff at; he had found. He thought your muscular physique was very easy on the eyes and often tries to squeeze you into a corset to slim your waist down more. In his words: 'Muscular men with small waists are quite a sought after figure'. He'll have you model with him often in position that has you lifting himself and another model or a heavy product that he's advertising.
🪞 Vil appreciates how good of a listener you are. He'll often come to you and talk about how he thinks his dorm members hate him. How he feels a little bad for pushing them so hard. Vil vents about how, one time, Epel had accused him of trying to erase his personality. You only rubbed circles on the small of his back and encouraged him to keep talking. He felt bad... but it didn't stop him from carrying on to do it all over again the next day.
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"Alright, my Chivalrous Sweet Potato, you know what to do. I simply can't dirty my shoes, so you'll have to use that strength of yours to carry me over all of this awful mud, understand?"
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🏹 Oh, Rook just LOVES you! You bring him so much joy. Though he comes off strange considering the whole hunting you thing, he really means well. He considers the two of you to be the best of friends; connected at the hip, partners in crime, two peas in a pod and so on. Truly you and Rook have the most beautiful, albeit somewhat one sided, friendship.
🏹 He finds your silliness quite admirable and finds similarities between you and Epel pretty often. You make him laugh pretty often when you make jokes about beauty or even the art of hunting. Often times he sits down with you to write silly poems together and read them out loud to each other, or have Vil and Epel unwillingly sit in as the audience. Please release them, they're suffering.
🏹 He loves when you tease him and he loves to tease you back. Rook plays pranks on you pretty often as well. Suddenly appearing behind you, hiding in your bedroom and jumping out to scare you when you get comfortable, shooting an arrow with a bag of glitter tied to it just above your head; you know, the usual. Ah yes, Rook loves a good prank.
🏹 Pilier de force; pillar of strength. That is the nickname he gave you after you picked him up with one hand, like he weighed nothing. Oh, how he swooned in that moment. What a heart throb you are, swooping in and cradling this humble huntsman in your arms. He's definitely suggested you taking up archery on many occasions, you certainly have the upper body strength to pull a bow string properly.
🏹 You have what Rook calls an insightful heart. One full of untainted, unshakable love, compassion and forgiveness. He believes that in a previous life you must have been an angel of some kind with how beautiful you are. Rook has even said your more fair than Vil in his eyes because of your beautiful and noble heart.
👑•♡•👑•♡•👑•♡•👑•♡•👑•♡•👑•♡•👑•♡•👑
"Oh, mon Pilier de Force. Your compassion knows no bounds. Your heart is pure as the first snow of autumn. One cannot help but to swoon at such a loving disposition, monsieur."
👑•♡•👑•♡•👑•♡•👑•♡•👑•♡•👑•♡•👑•♡•👑
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🍎 Epel thinks you're pretty cool! No— badass is a better descriptor. You two are best friends! Or at least, he wants to be your best friend. The both of you had never even conversed before he literally ran into you in the halls; he was just too shy to approach you. But then you helped Epel up and introduced yourself and you hit it off from there.
🍎 At first he thought you were going to turn out to be another creep like Rook. However, he was pleasantly surprised by the lack of weirdness. No stalking, no appearing out of nowhere, no breaking into his bedroom. You were just a bit af a goof and by the seven did that have him relieved. You supply him with a great outlet to let all the stress of being in Pomfiore melt away just by being around him.
🍎 Epel is okay with your teasing so long as you don't mention his appearance being feminine in any way since he's pretty insure about it. He can take a joke about his height pretty well but he'll climb on you in retaliation, so be prepared for that. He also loves pranks! Epel will even get Rook to join in if he can.
🍎 Your so cool! How are you that strong! Teach him! Teach him! Please, teach him your ways! If he's as strong and muscular as you he'll be manly for sure! Here, lift this bookshelf right here. Yeah, it has books on it still but that'll make it even cooler when you lift it. Ah! No! Don't pick him up! He'll bite you, he swears on it!
🍎 You're such a good listener; has anyone ever told you that. Epel is surprised that he feels comfortable enough to confide in you about his insecurities. How he feels about his appearance and how he feels about the way Vil treats him. And by the time he's finally got everything thing off his chest, Epel cries into your shoulder as you simply pat his back and tell him to let it all out. You never chastise him for not acting masculine enough; in fact, you never bring his appearance up at all.
👑•♡•👑•♡•👑•♡•👑•♡•👑•♡•👑•♡•👑•♡•👑
"Woah! That's so cool! How can ya even lift that much weight? D'ya think I can lift that too? Ya gotta teach me how! I know yer gonna be the best teacher f'me, so let's get started!"
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🐲 Are you talking... to him? Are you sure, you do know who he is right? You know, Malleus Draconia, scary dragon fae, immensely powerful mage, Diasomnia's prefect and heir to the Valley of Thorns's throne? Oh. You really are taking to him! And you're not scared of him? This must be some kind of blessing from his grandmother, right? No, it doesn't matter, he's thankful either way.
🐲 He doesn't mind your silliness, it's such a nice change from the near constant fear that's directed towards him whenever he goes somewhere that's not Diasomnia. You make him so happy he can't even put it into words. When he's with you he's sporting a constant toothy grin because that's just how powerful of an effect you have on him. Please keep goofing off with him, his heart wouldn't be able to take it if you got bored of him.
🐲 You remind Malleus so much of Lilia when you tease him. Perhaps he should introduce the two of you! He knows that you never do it in a malicious way; it's just for fun. Malleus definitely indulges himself in teasing you back. For him it's playful banter between soul mates.
🐲 Oh dear, you've got quite the strength in you, haven't you, Child of Man. Perhaps, only if you wanted to, you could be trained to wield a sword and join his guards? Though, you don't have to, it's only a suggestion. When you scooped him up in your arms one time like he's as light as a feather? Oh he's over the moon with joy that you're even near him, let alone sweeping him off his feet.
🐲 Malleus finds it really endearing that you listen to his trivial issues. You must be bored of his voice by now with how much you've allowed him to drone on and on. He's not even speaking of his troubles anymore, he's telling you about what his day entailed. Surely, Malleus always finds himself wondering, you must have things to share as well. Please share your troubles with him as well! He wants to be a supportive friend like you!
🐉•♡•🐉•♡•🐉•♡•🐉•♡•🐉•♡•🐉•♡•🐉•♡•🐉
"I never thought it would be quite so relieving to confide in someone other than Lilia about my present worries. So I must thank you, child of man, for lending an ear to me in my time of need."
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🦇 You two get along like white on rice! Seriously! You and Lilia are nearly inseparable! Except that one time he rendered you bedridden with one of his culinary abominations; you were out of it for almost a week. Lilia felt kind of bad of course but the face you made kept him laughing the entire time you were ill.
🦇 The two of you are the silliest people in Diasomnia, it seems. Not that he minds of course; having you around will help him on his mission to get Malleus and Sebek loosen up a bit. It's healthy to be a goof every now and then, it just so happens that you're like that nearly all the time.
🦇 You'll rarely succeed in teasing Lilia. You can rarely catch him off guard or fluster him. Even your pranks are unsuccessful most of the time. But don't give up yet! It really amuses him to see you so passionate about getting one over on him. Lilia prefers to tease you instead, it really makes his day. He'll also insist on playing pranks on other together rather than alone, it's just much more fun that way. The few times that you can tease him, it's the funniest thing he's ever experienced to be honest.
🦇 Well, aren't you strong. He may offer to train you with a sword like he did with Silver and Sebek. Whether you want to train to be one of Malleus's vassals is up to you, but he did offer.. You've got physical strength, yes. And you might be able to be him in an arm wrestling competition. But! Can you defeat him in this new video game that the youngsters say are all the rage? He's serious. Can you beat him?
🦇 You're quite compassionate, aren't you. How sweet. Lilia often finds himself coming to you and talking about his concerns with his three children. He's thankful that you hold no ill will towards Malleus and Sebek because of how they come off. Though he rarely does it, Lilia sometimes tells you about his experiences in the war. Sometimes he'll be reduced to tears from the haunting memories of his fellow fae being slain, but you just hold him tight and let him cry. Lilia's thankful for that.
🐉•♡•🐉•♡•🐉•♡•🐉•♡•🐉•♡•🐉•♡•🐉•♡•🐉
"I know I assured you that I'm far older than my looks my lead on... But ... baby faced grandpa. Pfft- that's— Wait! I still want you to elaborate what you meant when you said all my past lovers 'dodged a case'!"
🐇.•°•.🐇.•°•.🐇.•°•.🐇.•°•.🐇.•°•.🐇.•°•.🐇.•°•.🐇.
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moodymisty · 2 months
Text
𝕴 𝖉𝖔𝖓’𝖙 𝖈𝖆𝖗𝖊 𝖜𝖍𝖆𝖙 𝖞𝖔𝖚 𝖙𝖍𝖎𝖓𝖐, 𝖆𝖘 𝖑𝖔𝖓𝖌 𝖆𝖘 𝖎𝖙’𝖘 𝖆𝖇𝖔𝖚𝖙 𝖒𝖊
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[ 𝕸𝖔𝖔𝖉𝖞𝕸𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖞'𝖘 𝕸𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙 | 𝕬𝖔3 ]
Part 1, part 2, Part 3
Author’s note: Time for the dicking, enjoy.
Summary: Cato Sicarius continues to fume over Primarch Guilliman's diplomat, unable to hide his disdain; But neither you or himself are wise to how he truly feels.
Relationships: Cato Sicarius/Fem!Reader
Warnings: NSFW, Degradation, Sexism/misogyny, Choking, Size difference, Toxic relationship, inadequate foreplay and aftercare, Dubious consent, Sicarius is a virgin because like... he's a space marine but also he's not going to admit that to you lmao, Please remember this is not me like slandering Sicarius or something this is just my kink
tWord count: 5240
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Cato Sicarius makes his way down the main thoroughfare of the Macragge’s Honour, helmet tucked in the crook of his left arm. His cape flows behind him just barely dusting over the ground, the shine of his sword catching every glint of light. He walks with purpose, head held high.
Cato Sicarius is ever the epitome of Ultramarine valor.
His dutiful walk is interrupted by something catching his eye however, as he looks out towards a myriad of docked ships. One is being refueled- an action that in and of itself is not wholly unusual - and he sees Ultramarines preparing to board it.
Second Company, Ultramarines. He recognizes their regalia, and some of the men armoured and prepared to be loaded in. Titus is among them; A face and set of armor he instantly recognizes despite his preference not to.
But... What are Second Company Ultramarines doing preparing to board a landing ship without his leadership, or at least knowhow?
With a newfound haste, he approaches the landing ship and catches the attention of the first marine that passes by.
“Yes, Captain Sicarius?” Sicarius gestures to the ship with his right hand, still holding his helm with the other.
“What is happening that’s deployed some of Second Company that I am somehow not aware of?”
The marine looks at him with a very odd expression, that Sicarius can't seem to place. He looks back towards his fellows for a moment, of whom give Captain Sicarius the proper respect when they realize they've caught his eye. The young marine he had questioned speaks up and regains his attention, Sicarius turning to look back at him.
“Lord Guilliman has us as retinue for the lady diplomat. She’s in charge of negotiating planetside with the local population.”
You.
Of course it’s you. Sicarius laments that it’s never anyone else. Since the day Guilliman requested your assistance to the day he kept you aboard this ship, he’s found your existence at best annoying, and at worst absolutely infuriating.
He is worth more than escorting around baseline diplomats, as are his men; But why don’t they seem to mind?
Titus doesn’t mind; but Titus is a scavenger seeking anyone who will blindly trust him after his incident, in Sicarius’ eyes. To think the man had once served as captain.
Sicarius turns away from the marine with nary a farewell and begins to make his way to Lord Guillman’s study with haste, his ceramite boots freshly cleaned thunder on the ground and rattle the metal tiles.
When Sicarius arrives at the doors to Guilliman’s chambers the guard in front lets him pass without issue, given his rank. Sicarius wouldn’t be here if he didn’t consider the matter important.
Though when he enters and announces himself to his primarch, Guilliman looks up from flimies and parchments with an expression Sicarius can only describe has bland.
“Have I misheard that some of Second Company are leaving without a captain?” Guilliman steadies his soul and looks at him with a dour expression.
“No, you haven’t. I have Lieutenant Titus currently serving as their leader. I made the decision not an hour ago.” So Titus was not only involved, he was leading the front. Unlike your previous escorts, where he had merely served under Sicarius.
“You have a lieutenant serving in my stead? Do I have no voice in this?” Guilliman leans upright, abandoning his materials and any hope of continuing to go through them.
“I have a lieutenant serving in your stead because you have an attitude that has become uncharacteristic of this legion.” He gestures plainly to his table, and unconscious action to emphasize his words.
“Were you not one the most gifted fighters this legion has seen, I would consider your attitude problem beginning to exceed your worth,” Guilliman continues. “The woman is staying. She serves a purpose for me to trust with less important tasks and if you cannot handle that, then I will assign another to lead her retinue in your stead.”
Sicarius boils in his armor at his primarch's words, like he's been spit in the face. His face grows hot with anger, though he holds his tongue.
Does Guilliman really put so much value on you? You're nothing but a weak little inconvenience that must be escorted around to avoid being killed by even the simplest of things, how can a primarch possibly trust you so much? Enough to waste so many resources, like Astartes that should be in the field of battle, just to keep you alive?
You must've done a great job at convincing him of your own importance, slotting yourself right close to his side. Have you seduced him the same way you seduced his men, with the delicate fabrics of your dresses that tight wrap around your waist and soft hands that contrast with scarred ceramite plates? Do you have your eyes set on larger goals?
No. How dare he think such a thing of his primarch; To think he would be so weak as to fall of the wiles of such a woman.
Sicarius clears his throat, and then regains the composure he had so nearly lost.
"Very well."
Sicarius leaves his Primarch's study when Guilliman nods at him, a cue that he understands the conversation is concluded. The dark red fabric of his cape billows behind him as he walks, the bottom frayed from years of dependable use.
He is sure you've departed by now to the surface of the planet they now orbit. He can see the top half of the planet through the windows as he looks out, past the space debris. He stops for a moment, as serfs, servitors and servoskulls pass him by.
He wonders what you're doing down there, before he swiftly pushes it from his mind.
The rest of Second Company that are not currently on active duty are now currently in their daily training, and Sicarius makes himself busy by attending in person; Standing like a shadow watching and inserting himself or his voice where needed.
He hopes his presence even occasionally prevents any of the men from slacking, as even the most minor error can cause irreparable damage to his men, their battle brothers, and perhaps even worse. Minor slip ups are not something Ultramarines will tolerate, not even once.
After a few hours, Sicarius decides to take his leave once many of the men currently training put down their arms to eat their meal of the day. Sicarius purposely takes a different path than them, to avoid bunches of young, talkative marines. Neophytes are even worse, though thankfully he hasn't had to deal with them today.
While walking, he hears a voice that stands out through the sounds of ceramite boots on the ground, and the hum of machinery.
"I don't mean to be disrespectful to any of you all, but I would pay anything to see that."
It’s you. He recognizes your tone of voice.
Sicarius slows his walk slightly, eyes glancing to the left at the branching hall that will soon connect with the one he walks down. That's where the voices must be coming from, as an astartes laughs.
"We all still give the new ones a hard time about it. Not all of us had the most smooth transition into wearing our armor."
Another marine laughs, as they continue to walk.
"We fall over for Macragge!"
Sicarius reaches the apex where the two halls collide, and sees you with the same squad of marines that he had seen you leave with. Titus included. You're all smiling; Though the smiles fade from the astartes faces completely and turn to expected stoicism upon getting noticed by their captain. You loose your smile as well, and nod politely at him.
"Captain Sicarius."
You all say, greeting him. He glances at them, a hand on the pommel of his chainsword. He only casts you a brief glance, before he forces himself to look away.
"You all returned quite quickly."
You nod, and Sicarius doesn't know why he's upset over your change in disposition. The marine behind you speaks for you, his ashy blonde hair sticking to his forehead from the pressure of his helmet.
"It went well, Captain. We are on our way to report to Lord Primarch Guilliman."
Sicarius hums.
"Very well. Get on with it then."
Sicarius continues walking by, gripping the pommel of his chainsword tight as you all disappear from view, in the direction of the bridge. As he continues to walk, he figure you’ve all made it there by now, if not already left.
He wonders how the conversation went.
Did Primarch Guilliman praise you all? Compliment you for you diplomatic talents? The Primarch has a surprising amount of trust in you, for a baseline human. He has had no shortage of good things to say about your dedication and work ethic, how well you’ve helped him in this new Imperium- As Lord Guilliman uniquely calls it.
Is he the only one that feels this way? Why does no one just understand? Why is he alone in this?
The lights in the halls are dimming slightly; The marines are all beginning to sleep. Sicarius decides to quit wandering with no goal and get his armour removed, before returning to his quarters and getting some rest. Perhaps that will make him a bit less irritated at every little thing that manages to get under his skin.
It hasn't worked in the past, but he isn't apposed to giving it another chance. At least he wasn't the one who had to escort you, though he knows that it would've been significantly easier to assassinate Primarch Guilliman's prized diplomat without him there.
He should’ve been there. He should’ve been at your side, not Titus, he thinks as he has his armored removed piece by piece. The serfs and tech priests treat every piece with respect, as they should. Once they carefully hand him his robe, he slings it over his shoulders putting it on before stepping down the two steps away from the armouring machinery and leaving. The walk is short, and it isn’t long before the captain can slouch his shoulders once safely behind the privacy of his own door.
Sicarius’ quarters as one would expect are befitting of his rank; A singular habitation suite occupied by him alone. The bed is more than large enough for a man of his stature, and he sits on it in only his linen robes before taking them off and throwing his legs fully onto the bed.
He has five hours before he needs to wake. Tomorrow shouldn't be a day filled with too many unknowns and busywork. He hopes. But no matter how much he thinks it, sleep just won’t come. At least not full sleep; He could do as he does in the field and let only parts of his brain rest, but that isn’t what he wants. Normally he can fall asleep within moments after he closes his eyes as he's trained himself to do, but now he finds himself staring at the ceiling, flexing his fingers.
His palms are sweating. Sicarius wonders if he's getting ill, as he realizes much of his skin feels warmer than usual.
He takes few slow, deep breaths. The way he would when trying to get partial sleep in the field. But it doesn't work, and he finds himself leaning up to sit.
One of his hands presses against his bare thigh, as he slouches. The muscle and fat of his stomach folds as he runs a hand through his cropped hair.
He wonders what you're doing right now. You sleep for a few hours longer than the marines do, and when he had voiced up about it, Guilliman had told him baseline humans need more sleep than them to function at their peak. You had joked to one of his men once however that you didn't always sleep for all that time, sometimes you would work while in bed.
Sicarius growls and shakes his head.
Why does no matter for how briefly he lets his minder wander, it goes back to you? He can't even clear his mind for a moment before it's back on you, what you're doing, the way you look at the people around you; But not at him.
Why?
What do you see in all of them that you don't see in him? He is Cato Sicarius; The commander of the Victrix Honour Guard, the Grand Duke of Talassar, the Master of the Watch. Yet you cast your whoreish gaze to the likes of Titus, a demoted marine with a permanent stain upon his name.
You treat him with respect, issue the bare minimum conversation needed to communicate, before leaving him. Is he not enough for you? Are you scared of him? Why does the idea of you fearing him illicit a feeling that seems negative?
He knows he shouldn't care. That this is all meaningless, but he can't help but want an answer. Why do you keep your most whoreish and sweet smiles for others? Perhaps you know he is too well disciplined to even bother trying. And so you toy with the others, sitting beside them as they shadow you with massive sets of armor, holding a gauntlet of which you can only grasp two fingers.
Sicarius shifts slightly, and feels the way his lower body is tight; He’s hard, pressing against his inner thigh. He feels disgusted with himself that he's allowed this to happen.
You just keep clouding his mind like some sort of malignancy that he can’t remove.
Damn it all.
Sicarius rises from his bed and lets his feet hit the floor, dressing himself before leaving his personal quarters not two hours after he entered.
He knows where your own quarters are by memory despite having never actually entering, storming by anyone in his path to get there. When he does, it’s easy enough for him to override the door lock and enter himself, closing it behind him.
You are just rising in your bed as the door hisses shut, the fabric of your clothes molding to your skin.
You’ve taken off the underclothing for your chest- Sicarius doesn’t know the name - and he can clearly see the outline of your breasts through your clothes.
“What is t- Captain Sicarius?”
He storms closer and as his face becomes more illuminated by the soft light at your bedside, you see his seething expression distorting his stubble-ridden face. The papers you must’ve been working on are sitting on the small table to your side, having been recently abandoned in favor of sleep.
“You."
He points at you and you can almost see the finger shake from how furious he is. Your lips are parted slightly as your mouth gapes from surprise, wide eyes looking between his hand and him.
"You are little more than an Ultramarine branded harlot.”
Your face is shocked and surprised, Sicarius heeds none of it. He can hear your heart racing in his ears as he approaches more and grasps the front of your clothing, pulling it away from your chest. For a brief moment he feels the soft pillowy nature of your breasts pressing against his knuckles, before the fabric is pulled away.
"Captain Sicarius, I, what do you think you're doing?"
He hears you stutter, the crack in in your voice. Now of all times you become shy? Not when you were pressing your hands to Titus' armor and complimenting him? Like you’re begging him to ravish you? Not when you have one of the young, fresh marines toss out a hand for you to grab so you don’t fall?
“I am sick of you throwing yourself at my men like some faithless degenerate. If you want it so badly, then I will give it to you.”
Sicarius leans forward, putting his knee on the bed while he shoves you back down into it. Your head thumps against the pillow, bouncing as the massive astartes moves to cage you underneath him.
Both of you have always been well aware of the size difference of all the astartes of the Macragge's honour, and Guilliman himself; Other than the serfs, occasional other diplomat or Imperial pskyer, everyone aboard the ship towers over you. It is particularly apparent with Sicarius, who shadows you in the near dark with a body significantly wider and taller than your own. He’d never realized just how small you were; Both of his massive hands could circle your entire waist.
“Throwing myself? What are you t-“
The speed in which Sicarius moves a hand to your jaw is enough to pull the air from your lungs.
“Quiet, whore.”
Your hands latch onto his arm, pulling at solid muscle. It doesn’t budge in the slightest, your palms sliding over scars, hair, and the metal of his interface ports. It feels like barely anything at all, your touch is so feather light and soft.
Pulling his hand away from your jaw he reaches and grabs a handful of the fabric of your nightgown, pulling it upward roughly. You could hear the sound of multiple stitches snapping, fabric now bunched at your stomach.
The air on the ship is always cold, but a shiver runs through you as you feel the hot skin of his hand on your waist.
He’s never actually touched you before. He’s never felt your skin with his own, the most he’s done is grab your shoulder with his gauntlets on to guide you someplace. You’re even more fragile that he would expect, you’re nothing compared to his hardened bones and you feel as if you’ll break apart in his hand. Your back arches up to fit his fingers between you and the bed, breathing heavily. Your attire always left little to his imagination, but it’s still different to actually feel.
“How are you still so soft after all this time,” He grumbles.
You have a less taxing job than many aboard the ship, but Sicarius knows that if you could have your way, you’d lay back and let the marines of your retinue use you. If you aren’t already, the way his men follow you around like dogs instead of acting like the way the Emperor’s Angels should gives doubt. The mere thought makes him jealo- furious; For his men not himself, he thinks as he grabs a fistful of his robes.
The front of most astartes robes are tied or wrapped, and so it doesn't take any sort of intense effort from Sicarius to pull the fabric apart, pressing his bare skin to your own.
It’s so hot; It's like his blood is boiling just below the surface of his skin. But is it because of his anger, how much he seems to hate you for reasons indiscernible, or because of something you can feel pressing against your thigh? His cock is already completely hard, tip wet and leaking precum as it slides up your thigh.
He only needs to do this once; Break this curse you have on him. He needs to be able to be around you like are aren't suffocating him.
With little regard Sicarius slips his hand between your thighs and only briefly notes how soft they are, the pillowy flesh of your inner thighs presses against his hand like a blanket rather than hard muscle.
"Sicarius, are you really not going to explain yoursel-"
Your voice cuts off with a shaky inhale as his fingers slip between your outer folds, soft wet velvety skin covered by his hand. It isn't long after his initial touch that his fingers find your entrance and he pushes one inside.
You feel so much softer than he had imagined. So soft that even he in his anger is unconsciously more gentle than he expected, forcing his finger deep into you down to the hilt until his palm presses against you. Your body wraps around him like velvet fabric, warm and hot. When he moves, your thighs tense and shake, but you're still trapped in the cage made by his body.
"I don't need to explain myself to you," He says, and you quickly combat him with:
"You do when you storm into my room and try to-"
He pushes a second finger inside of you, and your throat shakes with a moan as you feel that aching stretch of being just under your limit. He feels the way you tighten around him, and even in his lack on knowhow, Sicarius can tell that it will be a tight fit for him inside you.
Why do you have to be so damn small? It just furthers his worri- complaints that you're so easily hurt, and need to be so heavily protected from even minor damage.
Even he's hurt you, he can see the bruise starting to blossom on your jaw where he grabbed you a bit too hard, though you don't seem to mind. You're too busy panting, grasping at his arms as his two fingers curl inside your cunt. It's like you're trying to pull him in deeper, you just want more and more because you're his little wh-
Perhaps impatient, Sicarius pulls his two fingers from you and feels the way your thighs tremble, and the way you've covered his fingers and some of his palm in that sweet stickiness. For the briefest, most minute moment, he wonders how it might taste.
His wipes them off on the blankets below him, before grabbing your hips and pulling you closer to him. You can feel the weight of his cock against your inner thigh until he moves to slide it along your folds, slicking himself with the wetness he pulled from you. Suddenly Sicarius shakes his head, letting out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding.
The room smells, entrenched in this sweet, salty smell that radiates from you in waves. It's intoxicating, the way it screams at him that you want to be fucked, you want to be turned over bent over you little whore you just want him finally you want h-
Sicarius presses the head of his cock against your entrance and pushes slightly, feeling the way he can slowly sink into your tight heat once he pops past the tight ring of your entrance. Though it is still a stretch. Astartes are big, and they match suitably. Your neck is tense, collarbone prominent as your muscles flex.
"Fuck- that's, that's too big..."
He only manages to force half of his cock into you when you already start complaining about feeling full, it being too much, but he continues to push and go farther beyond until you feel like he's threatening to push into your stomach.
"You'll take it- I'm not leaving till you do."
Eventually his hips press against the back of your thighs when he's fully sheathed inside of you, and he can hear your breath rattle in your lungs and your singular heartbeat against your ribcage like the pistons in an engine. Badum badum badum, he hears as his cock throbs inside of you.
Sicarius pulls himself out barely halfway before flicking his hips back towards you, listening to the way you suddenly keen underneath him. You tighten and leak around him, your pillowy cunt swallowing him whole. He hears the sound of his own skin slapping against your own as he drives himself deeper, and each time you squeal as his massive body forces your thighs apart.
"By the t- Sicarius,"
You can't help the way you tense, your stomach turns and tightens in knots as the head of his cock threatens to knock against your cervix. He can see tears pricking in your eyes; You don't get to whine about him being too much, you wanted this, you begged for it with those pretty dresses and sweet smiles, you wanton harlot. You keep begging, as your hands grip his thick forearms to keep yourself steady as he thrusts into you.
He had imagined once what it would be like to rip those dresses off of you, and the curse of his memory means he'll never forget that pondering. He'd have to wrap you in the fabric of his cape, hiding your body from everyone but him-
"You're too big, I can't-"
You're whining, tears prick your eyes but your cunt is soaked, leaking down his cock, your well thought out words and demure voice turned into helpless ramblings as you lay beneath him thighs spread for your better, your superior; Pulling him in with your greedy cunt.
"You can," He grips your hip tight and pulls you to meet him halfway into his thrust and listens to you let out a broken moan. "And you will."
Your eyes have been fluttering open and closed for much of this, unable to look at him directly in the eyes for long. But even now Sicarius' eyes drift downward, distracted by the shape of your barely parted lips. They're so soft looking, unscarred, and he finds himself pulled in before he even realizes.
Sicarius finally kisses you for the first time, pressing his lips to yours as his hips smack against your thighs. He rests on his forearm to get lower, while his other hand still grips your waist.
You’re frozen at first, before your hands move to knit into his cropped hair and you press back into him. He bites the inside of his cheek hard enough that he bleeds- tasting metal before it instantly coagulates. He’s rough, forceful- his teeth are dangerously close to hitting your own, he catches your bottom lip between his and hears the way you whimper.
“Cato…”
You speak against his lips, the bow of his upper lip brushing across your own. The stubble against his jawline scratches your skin, as your lips grow puffier from his less than gentle treatment of them.
He pulls away from you, your spit on his lips while his forehead rests on yours.
“I, I thought you hated me,”
You say, nails digging into the skin at the nape of his neck, just above the scars he has from the surgery for his black carapace. If the light was brighter in your room, you might've been able to see the grayish tint to his skin where you could see it underneath the surface. His voice sounds angry and confused when he responds.
...Does he hate you?
“I… don’t know.” His voice almost tremors, confused within himself.
If not for the circulated air of the Macragge's Honour always being so frigid, you're sure you would feel even hotter than you already did, as Sicarius traps you in a cage beneath him, radiating body heat. His arm rests close to your head, while the other grips your hip to keep him from accidentally pushing you away as he humps into you.
His forehead slides from your own to the side of your head, and you can hear his heavy breathing in your ear as he pushes his cock deeper into you than anything else has previously. The wet noises and skin on skin fill the previously silent room other than the humming of pipes in the ceiling and walls, and the sound of animalistic grunting from an astartes you thought hated you.
He does hate you. He hates you so much for doing this to him, but he's the one who's failing, who fell to the temptation rutting into you like an animal-
Sicarius groans as you somehow get even tighter than you were, feeling the way a shiver runs through your entire body as you cum on him. Your nails leave little marks that will leave in moments, though he knows the smell of your wet cunt will stick on him far longer.
"By the throne, you are too damn tight,"
Sicarius continues through it even as you gasp, nails digging into his skin. He goes faster and faster, your soft skin will surely be bruised tomorrow but you keep begging for more, as he snaps his hips into you and pushes himself as deep as he can possibly go. He lets out a shaking groan, and you feel him finally empty himself inside of you.
It's hot, there's so much; You feel limp underneath him as he keeps cumming inside of you. When he slowly tries to pull out you whimper, the feeling of emptiness and the way the moment the head of his cock slips out of you, the seed he left behind slowly dribbles out of you and onto the bed.
Sicarius, for a man barged into your room and humped into you like an animal in rut, clams up the emotions he showed to much of and looks away.
“You should wash. Titus will be able to smell me on you.”
You look up at him confused, leaning up just slightly before stopping. He can see spit from his kisses on the corners of your mouth, lips swollen and hair messy.
“Why would that matter?”
Sicarius goes to laugh, though he quickly cuts it off when he notices that instead of becoming angry like you normally would, you get withdrawn.
“You don’t think he’ll mind that his cute little diplomat is off with other Astartes?”
The collar of your nightdress is stretched and uneven, and you push down the bottom of it away from your stomach so it covers the mess he left between your legs. Or you at least try to, but you grimace when you attempt to lift your hips enough to push it down. Sicarius leans forward and gently tugs on it for you, snapping more seams but succeeding in covering your sore, cum slicked thighs.
"No, Titus was only being nice since he knew I was having trouble dealing with everything that's happened. Primarch Guilliman has been," You look away for a moment at the papers at your bedside, that are now scattered across the floor.
"He's been giving me so much to ease his burdens and believe me I am honoured to serve him, it's just- it's been overwhelming. Titus had just offered me an ear so I could vent." You look at him confused, brow furrowed and lips parted.
"You didn't think we were... Did you?"
Sicarius looks at you, at the concerned expression on your face. Your body is swollen and sore from his abuse even as gentle as he was, he can smell the salt of sweat on your skin.
With one smooth motion Sicarius shifts himself to get off your bed and stand, wrapping his robes about around him in an acceptable enough fashion for a captain.
"Cato?"
You raise up higher, sitting up and curling your legs to the side. He turns to leave, but that damn demure, worried voice of yours stops him. He doesn't even care that you're using his first name, calling him so casually.
"Can you stay for a minute?" He turns and looks at you with that neutral astartes expression.
"Why?" You blow a breath of air through your lips that makes them shake.
"Dammit Cato just, can you? Please?"
He watches you for a moment, as you wipe the corner of your mouth.
Eventually however he turns fully around and walks closer, standing at your bedside and towering over you. You swallow and he can see the knot in your throat move, before you look up at him and start talking.
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metalnecklace · 1 year
Text
Stubborn When It Comes To This
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Pairing: Javier Peña x Reader (plus size)
Words: 9075 (this really got away from me)
Warnings: Smut (mdni), Plus size reader, Use of (Y/N), Probably some historical inaccuracies, Mentions of canon character death, Language, Oral (both f and m receiving), Fingering, Light choking, Spitting, Creampie, Unsafe sex (wrap it up, folks), Praise, Consent is sexy!, Pet names
Notes: This was supposed to be a super quick thing, I have no idea what happened
Summary: Javier Peña is frustrating, until he isn’t.
Masterlist
Arrogant.
If I could pick any word to describe Javier Peña that’s the one I’d use. Arrogant. Or maybe asshole. Bastard. Piece of shit.
Maybe I was getting ahead of myself.
I had been working with the DEA for about two years as a secretary, and usually didn’t have much issue. Luckily most of the men left me alone due to my larger frame, but not even that stopped the infuriating Agent Peña from being a thorn in my side. My entire time was spent blocking him from documents he wanted, no matter how hard he shamelessly flirted with me for the first few months before he gave up the charade. I knew it wasn’t sincere, and I knew I’d be the one getting in trouble if I let him have what he wanted.
So I said the one word he hated the most: No.
“Come on, sweetheart,” he sighed, exasperated. “Just give me what I want. Do you understand what’s at stake here?”
“Yeah, my job,” I grumbled, “and my sanity. Javier, we can't keep doing this.”
“You’re right, we can’t. So give me those files.”
I looked up at him, putting down the pen I had been writing with. “I can’t give you those files. I barely have access to them, so what makes you think you can?”
He chewed his lip, staring at me while I refused to budge. “Fine. But if Escobar gets away again I’ll know who to blame.”
I scoffed. “Yeah, ‘cause I’m to blame for your incompetence.”
He narrowed his eyes, his jaw clenching so hard his lips were in a pout. I thought for a moment he looked almost adorable, but shook the thought from my head the second it entered.
“You know what? That’s fine. You sit here like a good girl behind your desk and frilly little blouse, while I put my ass on the line so you can live safely.” He stood up to his full height, looking down his nose at me. I had never felt smaller, but couldn’t avert my gaze. “Can I have the files, yes or no?”
“Fuck you, Javi.” I gritted out between my teeth.
He grumbled something under his breath that sounded like mierda, then turned on his heel and marched away.
I grabbed a scrap piece of paper from my desk and spent the next fifteen minutes scribbling on it with my pen until it ripped through the surface. It was upsetting, the way he got under my skin like no other. I had never dealt with anybody like Javier Peña.
It had been a lot tougher to deal with him since Carillo’s passing. He no longer danced around the subject as much, and got straight to the point. Or demands, I should say. His patience was thinner and it seemed as though it was getting harder for him to keep his temper at bay.
I felt bad about my comment. He had never spoken to me the way he had, even when I had frustrated him so much in the past. But I knew he was still feeling the weight of Carillo’s death. It was no secret Javi blamed himself.
I had just gotten so sick of his attitude, I couldn’t stop the words from slipping out. Of course he had called me a good girl too. I was always dressed like a school teacher instead of the usual classy outfits the secretaries had. They always looked so poised, perfect, and sexy, whereas I always felt a bit frumpy when I tried to show off a bit more of my body. So I stuck to the knee length pencil skirts with flowy, frilly blouses tucked in and buttoned all the way up.
Perhaps what bothered me most was that he was doing the one thing that most of the women in that office were accused of. Everybody knew he slept around, either with informants or the other women in the office that allowed his company. When he wasn’t partaking in those options he could be found at the whorehouse or the bar. He did everything to get what he needed, who he needed. But the second any of the women indulged in the same they were shamed by the men around them.
On my very first day I could see Javier Peña coming from a mile away. The way his jeans wrapped around his legs and ass like they were made just for his shape, and the glisten of his skin shining underneath the top three undone buttons of his shirt. The pout of his lips, the warmth of his eyes. I could feel myself drooling just watching the way he sauntered down the hall to my desk. His fingers stretched out over the paperwork on my desk in front of me as he leaned in like we were sharing a secret. The pout on his lips slipped into a smile that made me glad I was already sitting down. That smile disappeared once he realized I wasn’t going to be giving him what he wanted.
He tried the sweet approach for months, but I never budged. It frustrated him, that was apparent, but I couldn’t afford to get in trouble because of him. I had been transferred to Colombia because I was well trusted in my position at home, and didn’t need to jeopardize that reputation because of some pretty boy.
Even though he was very, very pretty.
I didn’t see him for two weeks after my comment about his incompetence. It was strange enough for me to notice, since I usually saw him every few days if not every day. I hadn’t even seen him around the office, which meant he was either away or avoiding me. I figured it was the former since I doubted I was even a speck on his radar. Sure we pissed each other off, and I usually went home imagining what it would be like to go home to him, but to him I was just a pain in the ass secretary who stood in his way.
Eventually news traveled down the pipeline that Javi had been caught up in Los Pepes, which was a complete shock to me. I never suspected he would do something like that, but I assumed that just showed I didn’t know him well enough at all.
Without his presence the office seemed duller. I found I was just moving through the days, not realizing how much I had looked forward to our little arguments before.
When Murphy announced that they got Escobar, the first person I thought of was Javi. The man who had spent all that time, all those years, just to be sent home in the final hour. My heart ached for him, but I was mostly just glad the fight was over.
The fight with Escobar, anyway.
It wasn’t long before we were assigned to the Cali Cartel case. Some of the secretaries were leaving, but a select few got to be reassigned. I wasn’t sure where I was going to be assigned, but was told that I had specifically been requested.
Imagine my surprise to find I had been requested by Javier Peña himself.
I walked into his office, expecting to find a new agent, but found those eyes pinning me in place.
“Javi?” My mouth was gaped open, and I’m sure my eyebrows were raised comically high on my forehead.
“(Y/N),” he greeted me as though it was the most normal thing in the world. “You’re early.”
“You’re the one who requested me?” I asked, still shocked. “Why are you even here? I thought you got sent home.”
He chuckled and resumed looking down at the files on his desk. “I was, then they called me back. Turns out they need someone willing to do what it takes. As for you, yes, I requested you. Turns out you’re willing to do the same.”
He looked back up and met my eyes, his lips were quirked into a slight smile.
“I figured if you could keep me away from those files that long then I’d need someone like you guarding me.”
“Guarding you?” I was so confused.
“Yes.” He stood up and walked around his desk so he was standing in front of me. Whenever I had spoken to him in the past I had been sitting at my desk with him hovering over me. This time we were face to face, and although he was still taller than me it felt nice to at least be closer to eye level. “I need somebody to make sure I’m not bothered throughout the day. I have way more responsibility and people depending on me than before, and I can’t have people thinking they can interrupt me whenever they think their bullshit is more important than mine.”
I nodded, chewing on my lip. My heart stuttered as I watched his eyes flick to my movements before moving back up my face.
“That’s funny,” I finally said, “considering it was you who used to think their bullshit was the most important.”
His smile grew into a smirk. “Exactly. Which is how I know you’ll be perfect.”
My face heated at his praise, but I turned away before he could notice. “Great. I’ll be at my desk if you need me.”
I was stationed just outside his office door, and did my best to keep people out unless he told me otherwise. Although I was slightly annoyed to not only be working with him yet again, but to be working for him, there was a strong part of me that wanted to do my best. I wanted to do well for him.
To be good for him.
Javi was right, though, he did have more riding on his shoulders. There were times where he worked throughout the night, and I would walk in the next morning to find him in the same spot as he was the evening before with the same clothes. Other times he was gone for a few days, or even weeks.
I was usually quite swamped with whatever he needed me to do, but even though I worked for him I felt like I never saw him. Javi’s voice over the phone became a comfort, because then at least I’d know he was alive and well. Or at least physically well.
“Javi, are you alright?” I asked during a phone call one afternoon.
“Yeah,” he grunted, “of course. Why wouldn’t I be?”
He hung up, leaving me wondering what he wasn’t sharing. Not that he owed me any explanation. His work was exhausting, and he was putting every part of himself into it.
He finally caught one of the brothers, and the office decided to go out to the bar to celebrate the amazing victory. Javi didn’t seem to care that he made a huge step forward in not only the case, but also his career, and told everyone to go out without him. I watched his back, forever tense, as he dragged his feet into his office with his head down. He didn’t even acknowledge me when he passed by, but I tried to ignore the hurt that radiated through my bones.
I was dismissed with just a wave of his hand, and I went home to change. It had been a while since I had gone anywhere but work and home, and I couldn’t help but feel as though I wanted more. Every time I went home at the end of the day I longed for someone to fall into.
My closet was almost embarrassing, since I mostly had workwear that was not usually appropriate for a bar. In that moment I envied the other women at the office with their working outfits that looked so easy to transform to nighttime events. There were a few girls I had become friends with, but they were much smaller than me so I wouldn’t even be able to raid their wardrobes, and I was too proud to ask for fashion advice.
I swiped through skirt after skirt after blouse until I came across a dress I had tucked away toward the back. The tags were still on, but the little black number was perfect. It was slightly small when I squeezed myself into it, but only slightly. I just wouldn’t be able to sit in it. I also had to leave one of my top buttons undone, showing off the slopes of my breasts. The hemline was a bit shorter than the pencil skirts I usually sported, but it did the trick.
The mirror reflected a woman that I nearly didn’t recognize, until my red painted lips turned up into a smile. My eyes squinted a bit at the corners, showing my true happiness to be out of the office and ready to take on the nightlife.
I was on my way to the designated bar when I felt a pang in my chest, like a tug toward a certain building. Leaning forward, I asked the cab driver if we could make a quick stop. We pulled up outside the office and I slowly made my way inside. The lights in the hallways were dimmer than usual since the other offices were unoccupied, but one doorway was still bright.
Of course he was still there.
I stood in the doorway and studied him for a moment. Javi’s white shirt was a bit wrinkled, with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows and a few buttons undone. His tie was laying off to the side across his desk, next to his arms which led up to where his hands cradled his head. He was clearly stressed, if the ash tray of cigarettes were any indication, along with the empty bottle of whiskey next to them.
For a moment I thought about walking over to him and smoothing my hands over his shoulders. They seemed so tense they were almost up to his ears. But I knew that wouldn’t be the right move. Instead I just knocked softly on the doorframe.
He jumped a bit, looking up to see who was there. His eyes nearly bulged out of his head once he saw me, and he dragged his gaze down my body and back up to my face. I could feel my chest heating up but stayed steady on my feet. I knew what I looked like, and felt better in my skin than I had in a long time.
“What are you doing here?” He asked, both confusion and shock etched across his features.
“I should be asking you the same question,” I said. “You know we’re celebrating your accomplishment right? If you’re not going to join us, at least give yourself a bit of a break.”
He sighed and sat back in his chair, his hands clasped together on his lap. “Just because I caught one of them doesn’t mean crime stops for the night.”
I shrugged. “I know, but still. Why don’t you relax for the night and let them panic a bit?”
“I haven’t seen you wear that before,” he commented, changing the subject to keep me from pressing. To my shock, his eyes shamelessly roamed my figure once more.
He used to flirt before he gave up, back when I was just a barrier between him and whatever he wanted. But even then, he would comment on my hair, accessories, nails, but never my body. Even when he commented on my clothes it was a throwaway comment about the patterns or adornments.
The way he was following the way the fabric of my dress hugged my waist, my hips, my soft tummy, had me blushing like crazy. It wasn’t subtle by any means, and certainly not what I was used to from Javi.
“Yeah, I bought it a while ago but never had a reason to wear it.” I smoothed down imaginary wrinkles as a way to distract myself from his gaze. “Figured now was as good a time as any.”
He hummed in agreement and looked back down to the papers sprawled out on his desk. I wondered briefly what it would be like to be those papers before tamping down that train of thought. My face was already burning from his attention, I didn’t need to make it worse.
“Well, I hope you have fun tonight. You’ve been working quite hard, you deserve a break.” He still stared ahead at the papers, as if it was too difficult to look at me again.
“Javi,” I said, causing him to drag his eyes away enough to finally look me in the eye, “you should really come.”
He nodded slowly, then looked away once more. “I’ll try.”
I sighed and wished him a goodnight, hoping I would see him again before the night was through. The click of my heels echoed throughout the empty hallway as I walked away from Javi’s doorway.
Although I occupied myself with my small group of work friends at the bar, I still kept a lookout for my boss just in case he actually attempted to make an appearance. After about an hour I gave up, realizing that he wasn’t going to grace us with his presence.
I had known that in the past he would only go out with either Carillo or Murphy, that he wasn’t the celebratory type, but I had hoped things had changed.
One of my coworkers approached me. I hadn’t really talked to him other than being the middle person whenever he needed to speak to Javi, but he seemed quite nice.
“I don’t normally see you out of work,” he said. His name was James, and he was slightly taller than Javi, but didn’t have an ounce of his charm.
“That’s because I’m hardly ever out of work.” I chuckled, bringing my drink to my lips. When I first ordered it I had to struggle not to cringe at the strong taste, but after another two it was going down like water. Dangerous, but much needed.
“I’d love to see more of you,” James said, not shy in the way his eyes took in every part of me. I felt myself struggling not to shy away, so unlike the confidence I felt when Javi did the same. “You’ll have to get the boss man to give you some more time away.”
I smiled. “Yeah, like that will ever happen. You know he needs the best,” I joked.
James stepped closer, his cologne invading my senses. “Well, he needs to learn how to share.”
“Who needs to share?”
My back straightened as though someone shoved a rod through my spine. “Javi?” I asked spinning to see him standing behind me, a smile directed at me, his eyes downright murderous toward James.
“Hello, (Y/N).” Javi brought his glass of, what I assumed was whiskey to his lips, and raised his hand to my lower back. I welcomed the warmth of his skin seeping through the fabric of my dress while his eyes remained on the man in front of us.
“I didn’t think you’d be coming out,” James spoke calmly, as if he couldn’t tell the tension radiating between us. “I heard you weren’t the partying type. Well, anymore.”
Javi’s smile never wavered, but his eyes darkened enough that I noticed. “I wasn’t planning on making an appearance but somebody reminded me of how hard we’ve all been working.” He turned to look at me, his hand tightening slightly on my back. “If we don’t celebrate our successes we might as well let them win now.”
“You mean your success?” James wasn’t backing down.
“Teamwork.” Javi countered, looking back up at James. “I couldn’t have done it without my team.” His hand slipped around to my hip, pulling me into his space. James’ eyes flickered to the motion, his smile turning into a smirk.
“Wow. Looks like you’ve grown up a bit, Peña.”
“Someone had to.” His hand tightened, my chest felt on fire.
James glanced toward me, then the hand at my hip, before aiming his glare back to Javi. “Although it is comforting to see some habits haven’t changed.” He stepped back, turning to part from us, but not before throwing over his shoulder, “you two have a wonderful night!”
I didn’t have a chance to say goodbye before James was out of sight. Javi removed his hand from me and started to walk away, but not before I spun on him, ready for a fight.
“What the fuck was that?” I was shocked at Javi’s display, but mostly downright furious.
He shrugged, taking another sip of his drink. “I don’t know what you mean.”
“All of this,” I gestured between us, and to my hip, still feeling the warmth of his skin, “and the whole ‘someone had to’? Are you serious?”
His eyes darkened. “What are you trying to say here?”
“You have no right,” I hissed through my teeth in anger. “I may work for you but I don’t belong to you.”
“I didn’t even do anything. If you want to keep talking to James, be my guest.” He stepped closer, I could smell the whiskey on his lips. “But don’t think I’m going to stand by while that shitbag tries to pick you up.”
“Maybe I wanted him to pick me up, ever think about that?” I crossed my arms, then immediately uncrossed them when his eyes flickered to my cleavage on display.
“I did think about it, but thought you might want to know what kind of man was trying to do it.” He downed the rest of his drink then zeroed back in on me. “That man has been sleeping his way through the office and leaving a trail of broken hearts behind him. I didn’t think you’d want to be one of them.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “So he’s you?”
His lips tightened into a thin line, his jaw clenching. “Right.”
It felt like someone reached into my chest and squeezed my heart. I knew I wasn’t being fair, but I wasn’t completely wrong either.
“Javi, I’m sorry I-“
He held up his hand. “No, you’re right. I won’t be bothering you anymore, don’t worry. Have a good rest of your night.”
I didn’t bother trying to stop him as he set his empty glass at the bar and walked away. I sighed, finding myself alone, and when I looked around I noticed James was already chatting with another woman, her head thrown back in laughter. My night was ruined, so I went home.
Javi didn’t return to the office for another week. I had been told he was away looking for ways to keep Gilberto Rodriguez in prison, but he hadn’t left me a single note. He never even called me the entire time he was away. I worked away with what I had delivered to me by others, but Javier Peña never contacted me directly.
He had to return to his office eventually, but it only happened after Franklin Jurado was murdered. I knew Javi was beyond pissed and frustrated. But so was I, especially after he walked into his office without a single acknowledgment thrown my way.
I immediately stood and followed him into his office before he even had a chance to sit down.
“What do you need, (Y/N)?” He asked, still not looking my way,
“What do I need? What do I need, Javier?” My chest heaved while I tried to contain my anger. “What the fuck?”
He finally looked up, his face placid. “Unless this has to do with keeping that motherfucker locked up, then I suggest you save it for later.”
“Fine,” I grumbled, then walked out of his office, slamming the door behind me. I barely paused to grab my purse before storming out of the office, not giving a single shit who was watching my temper tantrum.
I marched myself to the nearest bar, ordering the cheapest whiskey they had. I wasn’t wanting to get drunk, just needed to dull the senses a bit. Calm the fires that licked at my heart.
Two drinks later I found myself feeling enough of the effects and bravery for what I wanted to do. I laid more than enough cash on the bar and clutched my purse to keep me steady as I walked out and in the direction of a certain apartment.
I had only been to Javi’s apartment once before, and it was only to drop off paperwork he had needed. He had barely cracked the door, not wanting to cross our work and home boundaries, which I appreciated in the moment. This time I was ready to run across those boundaries if he’d let me.
Javi never answered his door. I knocked over and over but no response. I sighed, realizing he probably hadn’t left the office. It felt as though I was doing a walk of shame as I made my way out to the street to try and flag down a cab.
The cab passed by the office and I almost asked if we could stop, but no longer felt the fight that had brought me to Javi’s apartment. Instead I just rested my head on the window and watched the lights pass by until we stopped outside my place. I trudged up the small flight of stairs and rounded the corner to find the man I had been looking for leaning against my door.
He was still in his navy suit from work, though his white dress shirt underneath was slightly wrinkled. His tie was missing which gave me room to see the expanse of tan skin exposed with his top three buttons undone.
I stopped in my tracks. “What’re you doing here?”
He shrugged as if it wasn’t a huge deal. “It’s later. I figured you still wanted to talk.”
I glared at him, his expression still not changing as if he was already bored from what I would have to say. Instead of lashing out in my hallway I pushed past him to unlock the door. I walked in leaving it open, he got to choose whether or not he crossed that boundary. Sure enough, I heard the door close with a click and the lock slid into place. I was glad he took the same safety precautions as me.
“Take a seat wherever.” I waved toward my living room before making my way into the kitchen. I grabbed two glasses and thought about it before pouring myself more whiskey. Javi would appreciate it, but I probably needed to slow down. I poured myself a glass of water instead.
I brought his alcohol and my water out to the living room and handed him the former before sitting in the chair opposite him.
“So,” he started, “what did you want to talk about? Back at the office, I mean.”
I took a deep breath in and out. “You’ve been a real jerk.”
He didn’t seem shocked whatsoever and nodded for me to keep going.
“I’ve been working my ass off for you, even though I did not like you, and you’ve been so rude. You hardly give me the time of day, and the whole James thing was fucked up.” I felt like everything I had to say was falling apart. I was spiraling, no longer fueled by the alcohol and anger running through my bloodstream just an hour earlier.
“Okay,” he said. “You done?”
“Yeah. Yeah, I’m done.”
He stood up, drained his glass, and placed it on the table. “Alright. Sorry for being an ass. Hope you have a good night.”
My mouth dropped open as he turned to leave. “Javi!”
He stopped but didn’t turn back to look at me.
“You can’t just leave, don’t you have anything to say?” I stood up and walked over to stand in front of him. He wouldn’t look at me.
“I don’t have anything to say. I apologized, what more do you want?”
“Javi, come on. There must be something else going on. I know you’re frustrated with work but that doesn’t explain your behaviour-“
His head snapped up, his eyes locking on mine.
“You have no idea what I’m feeling so don’t fucking act like it.”
“Then tell me! Tell me, Javi,” I begged.
He grabbed my upper arms and pushed me back toward the wall. His hand came up to the back of my head to cushion it against the hard surface, causing my breath to catch in my throat. I couldn’t look away from the heat burning in his eyes, intense and focused directly on me.
“I have seen shit that would keep you up nights. Stuff nightmares are made of. And I’m so fucking tired. Half the reason I smoke as much as I do, no matter how hard I’ve tried to quit, are to stop my hands from shaking, and the only comfort I’ve found is either in someone else’s bed or at the end of a fucking bottle.” He softened his grip on my arm. “Until I met you.”
I opened my mouth to speak but the look he gave me was enough to stop me in my tracks.
“Ever since you walked through that door you’ve been the only thing I think about. Whiskey doesn’t taste the same, smoking has lost all its effect, and I wouldn’t dream of being in any bed but yours. If only you’d have me. I know I don’t deserve you. You’re so good, you’re the hope in this world. I don’t deserve to carve out my own comfort in you.” He pushed himself even closer. I could feel the heat between our lips. “But that doesn’t stop me from wanting you. Craving you.”
He leaned in, his nose brushing against the underside of my jaw. My eyes fluttered shut as he inhaled my scent, sighing out and causing goosebumps to erupt over my skin.
“If you tell me to stop then I will, just say the word. I’ll walk away, I’ll move away if I have to. I’ll never bother you again.” His voice was raspy, a restraint pulled tight over his vocal cords. “But if you don’t stop me then I’m afraid I never will. I’m addicted to you. Just tell me what you want and I’ll do it.”
“Javi,” I breathed, finally opening my eyes again to find him pulled away enough to observe my reaction. “I-“
He shook his head slightly. “Yes or no, querida. Do you want this? Do you want me as much as I want you?” His voice was a whisper, barely loud enough to hear, shared only between us like a secret though we were alone.
I nodded my head, then said, “yes, Javi. Yes.”
Kissing him was like coming home after a long day. The plush press of his lips quenched a thirst I didn’t realize was that strong within me. It was everything I wanted. Everything I needed.
His arms were strong as they held me against his body, pulling me in tighter and tighter. I couldn’t breathe, but I couldn’t stop. Our lips slotted together perfectly, he pushed and I pulled, drinking him in. I moaned into his mouth, giving him an opportunity to slide his tongue past my lips.
We pulled away gasping for air, our chests heaving together. His eyes searched mine for any sign of regret or hesitancy. He never found it. The only thing radiating from my very being was want.
“Wow,” I sighed out, “that was… wow.”
He chuckled and leaned in to peck at my lips. “It doesn’t have to stop if you don’t want it to.” His lips smudged kisses across my jaw, then down to my neck. I moaned when he reached my collarbone, licking a strip up behind my ear.
“I don’t ever want to stop,” I said, slightly out of breath.
“Good,” he growled against my skin before sinking his teeth in enough to make me groan. “Me neither.”
“I need you, Javi,” I said, my voice turning to a moan at the tail end of his name.
“I know, lo se, hermosa,” he spoke between bites along my neck. “Show me your bed, baby.”
I pulled back as much as he would let me and led him by the front of his shirt through my hallway until we got to my room. Before I could turn around to face him again he had wrapped his arms around me and pulled me against his front. His name left my lips in sighs and moans while his hands slid up my body to cup my breasts, all while his lips still continued exploring any inch of skin they could reach.
My ass pressed back against his aching cock that could be felt through his suit pants. He pulled his lips away from my neck enough to whimper in my ear as I kept grinding myself back against him. His thumbs rubbed against my nipples through the fabric of my blouse and bra, but soon enough he pulled away with a huff.
“You look so sexy in this outfit, baby, but I need to feel you,” he said, his eyes roving over my clothed figure. He reached up and flicked the frills at my collar with his fingertips, smiling gently at me.
“Thought you hated the frills.” I remembered him commenting on them several times.
He shook his head, disbelief in his eyes. “They drive me fucking crazy, keeping up that good girl image. You were always such a good girl with everyone.” He leaned in and kissed me, pulling away just enough that I could still feel his lips. “For everyone except me.”
I gasped as he bit my lower lip, tugging on it slightly. His hands started undoing the buttons on my blouse as he kept talking.
“Always so vulgar, dismissive, uncaring with me. Pushing me away, telling me no.” His lips followed the skin he uncovered as he continued to slowly unbutton my shirt. “But you can be a good girl, can’t you?”
He looked up at me, his big, brown eyes tugging at my heart. He smirked and shoved me backward onto the bed. I barely got my bearings before feeling his body following mine, caging me in. There was no way I could move as he pressed me into the mattress and continued kissing his way down my body.
“You’re going to be such a good girl for me. Aren’t you, baby?”
“Y-yes, Javi,” I moaned. “I’ll be so good for you.”
I had never planned on giving in so quickly to Javi but I melted as soon as I felt his lips on me.
“Good fucking girl,” he growled against my lower abdomen. His hands slipped down to my skirt which he peeled down my legs. “God, these thighs. They look fucking delicious.”
I went to close them, feeling too open for him, but he slapped the inside of one of them before I could. He chased the sting with a gentle kiss, then sucked a trail of marks inside my thighs up to my center. He practically ripped my panties off, bringing them to his nose and inhaling while his eyes were locked onto mine.
Lord, he was sinful. And I needed him bad.
“Javi,” I groaned, pressing my head back into the bed.
“Ask nicely, hermosa.” His hands slipped up my calves and thighs, pushing my legs apart enough for him to settle between them. He was on his knees on the floor, and my legs were over his shoulders. “I thought you were a good girl.”
“Please, Javi. Please,” I begged. I wasn’t even sure what I was asking for, pleasure forming a steady haze in my mind. All I knew was that if he didn’t touch me I was going to go crazy.
“There we go,” he said before sliding his thumb through my slit. He ran it over my clit before moving further toward my hole. “Fuck, so wet. You’re absolutely soaked for me.”
I gripped onto the blankets as his tongue swiped over my clit. His name and ‘please’ were the only words I could say or think while his head was buried between my thighs. My back arched as his tongue was relentless on my clit, his hands warm and firm holding my legs in place.
“Are you always wet like this? Or is it just for me?” He asked, pulling away enough to circle me with his middle finger. I writhed on the bed, wanting more. “You don’t have to answer that, baby, I think I already know.”
His finger slowly pushed into me, and I moaned for him. “Javi, fuck, need you, Javi.”
“Lo sé, querida, but I need you to be patient for me.” He continued to fuck me slowly with his finger, then slipped another one inside. I practically lifted off the bed when he crooked them and hit the right spot. “There we go.”
“Javi, please,” I breathed, my chest heaving. “I want to cum.”
He smirked at me, then spit directly on my clit. My eyes rolled into the back of my head at the feeling of his spit sliding between my folds.
“Filthy, baby, you’re fucking filthy. You love this, don’t you?” He dove back in, sucking my bud into his mouth while he was rubbing against the exact spot I needed.
Lightning started to shoot through my veins, and I knew I was close. Just in time for him to leave my clit. His tongue traveled down until it was fucking into me between his fingers. My chest burned as a blush spread up to my neck as I opened up for him. His nose nudged at my clit once, then twice, until it became a steady rhythm.
He pulled away. “Ride my face, baby, use your hips.” He pushed his tongue into me then pulled back out. “I won’t break, I can take it, come on. Fuck my face.”
I groaned and reached down to fist his hair between my fingers. He slipped his fingers from my cunt and wrapped his arms around my hips, pulling me down on his face. His nose pressed deliciously against my clit and his tongue continued to lick into me. I started to buck my hips, testing out the waters until he used his grip on me to encourage more movement.
It wasn’t long before I was pulling his head as close as possible and grinding my hips against him. Javi moaned against me, the vibration racing through my body. My toes started to curl as his grip tightened into steel. A thrill ran through me at the thought that there might be marks afterward, that his fingerprints would be worn into my skin as a reminder of how I felt in that moment.
My orgasm hit me like a bolt of lightning as it shot through me. “Javi, Javi, Javi,” I chanted.
He groaned and finally pulled away once I fell limp. “Holy fuck, you’re so beautiful when you cum.”
I lifted my head to look at the man still on his knees for me. His face glistened with my juices, and my mouth watered at the thought of tasting myself on his lips. A blush continued to creep up onto my cheeks as I took in his disheveled appearance. He was still wearing his suit, which was extremely rumpled, and reminded me that I was still in my blouse and bra.
He leaned forward and kissed me, before he started to slide my shirt off my shoulders, then moved his hands to the straps of my bra. It was almost strange how delicate he was after the strength he showed while holding me to his face, but he was gentle as he slid my straps down my arms. One of his hands went up my back to the clasp, and he undid it with a simple motion. I gasped as he smirked at me while pulling the fabric off my chest.
I was always very conscious of my breast size. They were considerably larger from a young age, and something I had always tried to hide. The first time I hadn’t was that night at the bar. I thought about shying away from Javi as he uncovered them, but the look in his eyes made me freeze. His pupils almost completely engulfed the deep brown, and they were fixated on my fully exposed body.
“Holy fuck, hermosa,” he growled, reaching up to cup both breasts in his warm palms. “I knew you were beautiful, but seeing you like this? Unbelievable.”
His thumbs smoothed over my nipples, making me moan. The warmth of his mouth pressed on my sternum, then moved to my right breast.
“Javi,” I sighed, one of my hands coming up to the back of his head. His hair was still ruffled from when my hands were in it before, and he moaned when I gave a gentle tug to the curls at his nape.
He licked over my nipple, making my body jerk. “What do you need, baby?”
“Clothes, off, please,” I panted as he absolutely tortured my nipples with his teeth and tongue. “Need to see you.”
He pulled back, locking me in place with just a look. Slowly he started to slide his suit jacket off, maintaining eye contact even when he started undoing the rest of the buttons on his shirt. My skin vibrated with a restless want, my fingers itched to reach out and touch the tan planes of his stomach that he revealed to me. I was practically salivating by the time he dropped his shirt to the floor. His fingers moved to the button of his pants but I reached out to stop him.
“Wait,” I said. “Let me. Please.”
He smiled and dropped one of his hands, the other coming up to smooth the hair out of my face. “Okay, baby. You go ahead.”
I continued on, beaming up at him, trying my hardest to be sexy but the euphoria running through my limbs made it impossible. My fingers were trembling at the thought of what I was doing, but I pressed on, determined not to let him see how nervous I was. A firm grip on the underside of my jaw caused me to pause.
Javi lifted my face so I could see his. “(Y/N). We don’t have to keep going. We can stop right here if you want.”
I shook my head as much as I could in his hold. “I don’t want to stop. Just nervous is all.”
He nodded. “Take your time, I’m in no rush as long as I’m with you.”
His words caused my smile to grow almost too large for my face. I could tell he meant it, his smile matching mine even through the dark look in his eyes. Even if I couldn’t feel the heat radiating from his body, and the hardness just on the other side of his pants, I would know how turned on he was.
I popped the button on his pants and slowly dragged the zipper down. “Such a good girl,” he cooed above me, keeping me going.
The dusting of hair leading down his pants was soft against the back of my fingers as I revealed more and more skin. Where I thought his underwear should begin was bare, and when I started to pull the fabric down I was met with the thick base of his cock.
I glanced up and his hand reached down and cupped my jaw, his thumb smoothing over my bottom lip and dragging it down until it popped back up. I felt like I was barely breathing as I refocused on the task at hand and pulled his pants the rest of the way down.
His cock was smooth as velvet and heavy in my hand. I heard him inhale sharply as I started to drag my hand slowly toward his tip then back down to the base. I lowered my head until my lips were perched at the slit, and poked my tongue out to catch the bead of precum that had gathered there. He hissed through his teeth as I hummed at the taste of him.
“Fuck, baby, stop teasing,” he grunted, reaching his hand to the back of my head. I waited for him to pull me closer to his length but he never did.
I parted my lips and slid the head of his cock into my mouth further and further until I could feel the weight of him settle on my tongue. The taste of him was heady, and flooded my senses. Salt, skin, warmth, and him.
Before I could continue pushing myself further, his hand came around to my throat and wrapped around firmly. He pressed back and I had no choice but to pull myself off his cock, and continued to follow his grip until he had me pinned on the bed. His hand squeezed once around my neck, enough for me to feel lightheaded for a moment, and then he pulled away.
Javi slowly tugged at his cock, now throbbing and fully hard, while he watched me. My mouth was still agape and my chest rose and fell steadily.
“I’m sorry, hermosa, but I need to fuck you.”
I couldn’t speak, too stunned at the ghost of his grip on my neck. I had never had somebody do that, but the way he had wrapped his hand around my throat caused a steady pulse to erupt between my legs. I wanted his hands back on me, wherever he wanted to put them.
He kicked off his pants and socks, then climbed on the bed next to me. I pushed myself up until I was laying on my back toward the top of my bed, my head on a pillow. Javi watched with his mouth in the shape of an ‘O’, trailing his eyes up my legs, my stomach, my chest, then landing on my face.
He moved so he was on his knees between mine, and brought his fist down to his cock once more. I watched, mesmerized by the sight of the wet head of his cock disappearing in his large fist, as he lazily stroked himself.
“Touch yourself,” he commanded, his voice soft but firm.
I obeyed immediately, bringing my hand down between my legs and circling my clit with my middle finger.
“Fuck,” he groaned, “you look so good. You’re doing so good for me, baby, so good. Fuck.”
“Javi,” I whimpered for him. “I need you. Please, I need you so bad.”
I was absolutely aching for him, electricity lighting up my nerves while he watched me pleasure myself all for him. I gasped at the feeling of his cock sliding between my folds and looked to see him thrusting his hips against me. He held firm onto the base of his cock, directing it to nudge against my entrance before sliding it up to my clit instead, over and over and over.
“Beg,” he said. He didn’t ask, he spoke calmly as if he wasn’t torturing me.
“What?” I asked, unsure that I even heard him right.
“I said,” he slapped his cock against my clit, making my entire body jolt on the bed, “beg.”
I thought about what that meant for him. After years of begging me for something as simple as basic files, and after years of me telling him no, he now had me in the palm of his hand. For a second I thought about saying no, then he slapped his cock down again. Tears sprang to the corners of my eyes at the sensitivity, and I gasped when he pressed himself at my entrance.
“Please,” I whispered, “please, Javi. I need you, I need your cock inside me. Please fuck me.”
He sighed, pulling back. “You’re lucky my patience has run out. Next time you’ll have to do better.”
The thought of ‘next time’ raced through my mind, but that was cut short when he started steadily pushing in. The stretch of him caused my head to fall back into the pillow and a guttural moan was ripped from deep within my chest.
He stilled when he was settled all the way, and I wiggled my hips to feel more of him. He leant down and braced one hand on the bed next to my head, while the other gripped onto my outer thigh.
“Want to be gentle with you,” he said, his words coming out tight. “Want you to feel good.”
“Don’t. Don’t be gentle, please.” I panted underneath him, sweat starting to prickle at my skin. “Want to feel it, I want to feel all of you, Javi. Don’t hold back.”
He pulled out abruptly, and I whined at the loss of him. “I need you on top,” he said, helping me move so he could take my place on the bed. His hands guided me so I was straddling him. “You want to be good for me, right?”
I nodded, feeling my nerves creep up. He could see all of me, and I would be the one in control.
“Then fuck me like a good girl.”
He pulled my hips down into his length, and I threw my head back as he sunk further and further in. Once I was fully seated my entire body shuddered. His lips were parted with his tongue sliding out to wet them as he looked at me like I was his next meal.
“Look at you, baby, mierda,” his voice somehow came out incredibly sweet and syrupy, even though I could feel every ridge of his cock against my walls. “Ride my cock, that’s it, ride me like I’m yours, I’m all yours, baby, all yours.”
The only sound I could make was a squeaky, high pitched moan as my legs burned from bouncing on him. My hands were perched on his chest while his traveled up my body to grasp my tits. He held me firm and I used the opportunity to switch up what I was doing.
“Oh, Javi,” my voice came out lower than expected once I started to grind myself against his pelvis. His name continued to pour from my lips, getting more and more breathy until I was just shaping my lips around the letters.
“That’s it, good girl,” he continued his praise, which made me grind down even harder. “Such a good fucking girl.”
My orgasm approached steadily, less of a punch to the gut as the last one, and my thighs tightened around his torso. I continued to grind myself back and forth, my toes curling, his words and moans spurring me on. I reached up to one of his hands and pulled it off my breast, leading it up to grip around my throat. Finally I gasped out his name as my pleasure pulled me under, squeezing the air out of me until I slumped down over him.
“Oh fuck, such a dirty girl, cumming with my hand around your throat,” he growled.
He barely gave me time to recover, and pulled my upper body closer so he could bend his legs. “Stay still,” he grunted before pounding into me so mercilessly the only thing I could do was hang on to him.
My teeth latched onto his collarbone, and my hands scrambled until they found purchase on his shoulders. He was grunting and gasping while pushing himself in and out of me, my cunt deliciously trying to grip him while I sobbed from oversensitivity.
Javi chanted my name over and over while I continued to bite down on his neck. His hands reached down, one wrapping around my lower body to press me down onto him further, while the other gripped my ass. His body jolted, messing up his rhythm, and he held me even closer to him. I felt so incredibly full as his grip of steel held me firmly in place. His cock pulsed inside me before his hot cum started filling me up.
“Baby,” he whined against my temple, his voice gravelly and torn. “Baby, baby, baby.”
Eventually his body melted, his cock softening inside me. We made no effort to move, and stayed still just breathing together.
“I am never letting you go,” he murmured, his lips still pressed to my hairline above my ear. “You hear me? Never. You’re stuck with me now.”
I chuckled, then gasped when I felt his cock stir. “Sounds good to me.”
He helped me roll over so I was on my side, and he went to find a warm cloth to clean us up. I could feel his cum steadily leaking out of me, but was still a bit sad when he wiped it away. It helped when I saw the way he watched it drip out of me first, almost like he didn’t want it to end either.
We slept in each other's arms that night, and when I awoke to find my face still buried in his chest I couldn’t help but smile. He slowly woke up not long after me, and we laid in bed kissing each other slowly. Our tongues moved lazily together with our soft moans waking us up more and more. He pulled away and I reached for him.
“I can’t, we have to go to work.” He chuckled while gathering his clothes.
I groaned and rolled onto my back so I could watch him. He got dressed while I wished he would do the opposite.
“Can’t we just call in sick?” I mumbled, sleep still thick in my throat.
“Yeah, cause that won’t look suspicious.” He buttoned up his shirt, and started to roll the sleeves up his forearms a bit. “Bad enough I have to walk in there with the same clothes as yesterday.”
I smirked, and got up to get dressed. My smirk turned into a full blown smile, and it didn’t leave when we got into his car together, or when we walked into the office side by side with his hand on my lower back, and not when I sat at my desk.
And it certainly didn’t leave as I watched him continue on into his office with the top three buttons of his shirt still undone, showing off the purpling bruise on his collarbone.
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fuctacles · 4 months
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@steddiesummerexchange for @chaosgremlinmunson | part 3/3 | beta @stevesjockstrap 💚
T | 10858 | Steddie, Buckingham, platonic Stobin and Hellcheer, Wayne&Eddie | Soulmate AU, unconventional soulmates, misunderstandings, idiot4idiot, fluff | divider by me | Part 1 | Part 2 | Ao3
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He knows he has to tell Chrissy as soon as possible, but she'll have to wait. There's someone else he has to go through first. 
He kicks off his shoes, hangs up his jacket, and accepts his fate.
"So, not a word, but I got a new tattoo."
Wayne turns away from the TV, raising one bushy eyebrow at his nephew.
"Thought you were playing DnD today."
Eddie nods his head, sways on the balls of his feet, and sighs. 
"I was," he admits, and holds his hand up, palm facing his uncle. 
He observes in real time as the realization hits his beloved relative and an infuriating grin spreads on his face.
"I said not a word!"
"I'm not saying anything." Wayne raises his hands innocently, the satisfied grin on his face making his wrinkles contort in joy.
"I gotta call Chris," Eddie grumbles, making a beeline for the phone. His uncle's amused gaze doesn't leave him for a second.
Chrissy is, needless to say, ecstatic. She makes plans to get ready together faster than he can explain the situation. It ends with him digging deep into his wardrobe the next day. 
"I don't have any good jeans!" he exclaims, showing his friend another pair. 
"Well, I want to see all of them anyway, so I can choose the ones that give you at least an illusion of an ass," she explains patiently, sitting on his bed and doing nothing else but judging.
"Rude," he murmurs, but he's aware his ass is as flat as a wooden plank so he doesn't argue. "What if he's a platonic soulmate too? What if I'm misinterpreting things again?"
"Please don't remind me." Chrissy shudders and Eddie makes a face of his own. When they first found each other, there were a couple of unsuccessful attempts at kissing before they realized they were strictly platonic. "Then he'll have to fight me because I'm not sharing. He already has his platonic soulmate, we're all due for some action."
"You know, as much as I know you," Eddie says, pulling out another pair of pants from under a pile of winter clothes. "It never ceases to amaze me how nasty you are."
"You're nasty," she throws back. "Now put these on, I wanna see some ass."
His outfit looks the same as always, with a couple of minuscule differences Chrissy insists are making a change. His pants are charcoal, not black, and his ass is almost noticeable in them, and his shirt is one of the shorter ones. If he moves his arms the right way, a sliver of his stomach will show. He barely wins the battle for his hair, though.
"We can't have the same hair!" he protests when she describes what she wants to do - a ponytail with some loose strands. She pouts, with torture devices already in hand: a brush and a scrunchie.
"I'll let my hair loose," she offers, surprising him. She always complains about hair getting in her face when it's not tied back.
"You're that determined, huh?"
She nods her head furiously.
"Fine," he sighs. "Do your worst."
In the end, he doesn't look bad, but also not exactly like he tried. Just a cleaner version of his daily look. He gets a stink eye from his friend when he throws a leather jacket over it but she doesn't say anything. She knows he doesn't have many to choose from. 
They drive to the mall, where they are planning to grab ice cream before going to the cinema. When the pairs spot each other at the entrance, Steve seems to take extra joy in waving to Eddie. The dice on his palm rattles and so does Eddie's when he waves back. They both land on twenties. 
Despite it all starting because of the girls, it was their first official hang-out together, so the boys hung back to give them some space. And to observe the intense stare Robin was giving Chrissy's hand, like she was too overwhelmed to touch it. Eddie could tell that Steve was barely holding back a laugh.
"What are we seeing," Eddie asks when Steve wins the fight at the register and pays for his chocolate cone.
"Some comedy about aliens. Or, there's also a romcom we can switch to."
"Nah." Both Robin and Eddie stick out their tongues with disgust.
"Well, sci-fi comedy it is."
They chat a bit at the ice cream place, mostly watching Robin and Chrissy's attempts at flirting, before moving on to the ticket booth. When Steve asks for two double seats away from each other, something must show on Eddie's face, because Steve smirks at him.
"For privacy," he says, reaching out to gently trace the outside of his hand with his fingers. 
Eddie has to be pushed towards the theatre after that, too floored to move. He panics a little when separated from his soulmate, who is too engrossed in her crush to even notice. 
"Hey." Steve tugs gently on the cuff of his jacket. "Relax, I'm not going to eat you. I won't even touch you if you don't want me to." He seems disappointed by that prospect but his tone is soft and genuine. Eddie knows he can trust him so he twists his wrist to squeeze his hand gently.
"It's okay. I'm just still a little surprised by it, is all," he reassures him. 
"Okay." Steve squeezes back. "Just tell me if I'm too much."
"Sure." 
He doesn't have to say anything, because he can barely sense his presence next to him. Other than them putting up the armrest to press their shoulders together, and Steve brushing against his hand from time to time, he doesn't press further. Eddie, though, is getting antsy, and having Steve next to him proves to be just a part of this problem. Halfway through the movie, he leans closer to his companion.
"You're never picking the movie again."
Steve groans quietly. It sounds like he's relieved.
"I know, I'm sorry," he admits his mistake. "It looked good in the trailer."
"They are supposed to look good." Eddie points out. "Wanna leave?"
Steve hesitates. They both look at where their friends are sitting. The girls are leaning towards each other though facing the screen, probably roasting the movie to shreds.
"They seem fine, I guess," Steve reluctantly agrees. Eddie stands up without further prompting and gently leads him through the dark, down the steps, and to the exit.
The light in the hall blinds them for a second but Eddie doesn't drop his hand, half-blindly pushing forward.
"Gotta use the bathroom. Then we can grab a bite or something."
"We should wait for the lovebirds," Steve protests. 
Eddie rolls his head to the side, not sharing the sentiment.
"I don't know, they seem fine without us."
"But it's a double date," Steve presses. 
"Okay Harrington, we can just hang around the mall I guess. Until that sad excuse of a movie ends." He gives in, shaking his head. 
Steve seems happy with getting his way, which weirdly makes Eddie feel the same. 
They ease their grip on each other only when they reach the bathroom. Without a word they enter stalls far away from each other, figuring the urinals would make it too awkward. When they are washing their hands minutes later, Steve gives him a grin through the mirror.
"We have the bathroom all to ourselves, you know?"
Eddie raises an eyebrow, something in his gust twisting with nervous anticipation.
"Yeah? You wanna murder me or something?"
"Uh, no?" Steve's smile falls. "I just— Sorry, that was stupid. Forget I said anything," he sighs, threading his fingers through his perfectly coiffed hair. 
Eddie turns sideways to face him, his hip digging into the sink.
"You know, Chris and I tried dating for like a week after we found out. Kissing her felt wrong, like I was kissing my sister, but we were both convinced we were interested in each other like that."
Steve makes a face.
"Yeah, I was so sure I had a crush on Robin for a while. But then she said she's strictly into girls and we quickly realized we're twins separated at birth." He smiles. "So I uh, understand why you'd want to feel things out first." He nods.
But Eddie bites his cheek.
"That is the opposite of what I'm saying."
Steve cocks his head, brows furrowed. He has mirrored Eddie's stance, leaning against the sink.
"What are you saying?"
"Yeah, I do wanna feel things out, but I think kissing would be most efficient."
Steve doesn't hide the smile that grows on his face. Eddie bristles at that, mostly from anxiety and embarrassment. He chuckles nervously.
"Okay, your excitement scares me a bit. You really wanna kiss me that bad?"
"I don't think you realize how kissable you are." Steve shifts a bit like he's getting ready to pounce. "Can I?"
"Be my guest." Eddie waves his hand and straightens up himself, his minimal experience making him unsure of the proceedings.
He's expecting a straightforward kiss, but it's not what he gets. Steve slides closer, his heavy hand landing on his side. His face is right there, but instead of his lips, there is a feather-light touch on his nose, where Steve gently traces it with the tip of his own, inhaling his skin. Eddie breathes softly and okay holy shit there goes the first soft peck on his lips. Then another. And two more, until he's softly murmuring "Stop teasing" against them, prompting Steve to capture his lips in a proper kiss. 
There's nothing of the confusion from his kisses with Chrissy. This time the emotions are easy to pinpoint and decipher. They grow like an itch at the tips of his fingers, eager to touch, and he indulges by wrapping his arms around the man in front of him. They take a couple of wobbly steps towards the wall until Eddie can comfortably lean against it, trapped between cold tiles and Steve's warm body.
"Does it feel platonic?" Steve leans back to ask, his hand sneaking under his jacket to slide over his hip, scorching hot without the thick layer of leather.
"My dick says no," Eddie answers, making Steve snicker.
"Well, my dick agrees with yours."
They look into each other's eyes, a new form of understanding weaving between them, a bond more complex than the matching tattoos on their palms. They are each other's and there is nothing platonic about it.
Eddie muffles an unsexy sound of laughter, held back in his throat. Steve's lip wobbles.
"Maybe they should touch, they might be soulmates too."
The dam bursts, and they start laughing uncontrollably.
"Oh my god," Steve wheezes out, leaning heavily on Eddie. "You're so stupid."
"You're stupid," Eddie counters between laughs, shoving him before wrapping his arms back around him. Their tight embrace is the only thing holding them up while they laugh against each other.
They barely register the sound of the door opening, but catch the movement with the corners of their eyes. They turn in unison and spot a guy, frozen in shock by the sight of them: two guys holding one another up in a fit of laughter. The three men look at each other in silence, until Eddie squeaks and it starts all over. The man runs into the stall furthest away.
Eddie shoves Steve away, and Steve shoves back. They start a half-hearted slapfight until Steve catches his right hand, the one with the tattoo, and kisses the inside of his palm. Eddie's eyes go wide.
Steve grins and skips out of the bathroom.
"Hey!" Eddie calls after him, quickly following. "Not fair!"
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The girls find them lounging on the sofas in front of the theatre, poking each other with Twizzlers. Or maybe feeding each other. The scene is unclear, but the wide smiles on the men's faces are unmistakable.
"Twizzler?" Steve offers to his soulmate while poking Eddie's cheek with the candy. The man catches it with his teeth and tries to pull it from his grasp.
"Sure, thanks." Robin grabs one from the pack without batting an eye. "I get it the date was a success?"
"Was yours?" Eddie asks back, looking at Chrissy with a Twizzler hanging from his mouth.
"Yeah." She grins, hip-checking Robin. 
The girl blushes, chewing on her candy intensely. She's avoiding Steve's gaze but his stare only intensifies. He's basically peeling his eyelids back to burn a hole in her forehead with his eyes only.
"Did you guys kisssss?"
"Robin. Robin. ROBIN. Don't ignore me."
"I know you can hear me. ROBIN!"
She flinches when he mentally yells at her and he raises an eyebrow now that he has her attention. She glares at him.
"We did. Did you?"
He smiles smugly.
"Duh."
She snorts.
The exchange doesn't go unnoticed by their other soulmates.
"What was that about?" Chrissy asks first with a frown. But before any of them can answer, Eddie suddenly grips Steve's knee.
"Holy shit!"
Steve looks at him. Eddie's eyes are wide and full of awe, which is becoming his favorite expression on the man. 
"Can you read each other's minds?!"
"Uh, yeah," Steve admits, suddenly sheepish about the ability he's been so happy to have. And which impressed the little nerds to no end. And the big nerd too, apparently. If the way he started shaking his knee was anything to go by.
"Steve! My man! My soul!" Steve can't help but laugh at his exaggerated antics. "Magic tattoo? Mind reading? What other freaky shit can you do?"
"Well, the mind reading is more Robin than me..."
"Still!"
"...and the other freaky shit I don't show on the first date." He grins cheekily. 
Eddie's mind goes blank for a second, his excitement freezing as he reboots and processes what he just heard. Steve's grin only widens. He might like this reaction even better. 
Robin makes a retching sound, as she does, so he flips her the bird, as he does. Chrissy, though, has an evil smile that lets him know she'll be a great co-schemer in making Eddie squirm.
"Uh-huh." Eddie's mind has rebooted by now, so he looks back to him. "Next date when, then?" he asks. He tries not to look too eager but fails miserably. 
"I'm free tomorrow?"
"Perfect." Eddie grins at him. Steve picks his hand up from his knee and gives the tattoo there a gentle kiss. He bites back a smile at the soft gesture. 
"Do you guys have any soulmate abilities?" Robin asks, always the mood ruiner. She makes another dive for the candy and Steve lets her have the bag. He'd rather hold Eddie's hands anyway. They're a bit sticky from the Twizzler fight, but he doesn't mind. Maybe he should lick them clean...
"Well..." Chrissy trails off, and it immediately picks up his curiosity. 
"Don't say it," Eddie hisses at her, eyes narrowed. She shrugs with a teasing smile.
"They're gonna find out anyway. Besides," she pouts and gives him her best puppy eyes. (Steve is very impressed, after all, game recognizes game.) "Are you ashamed of our bond?"
Eddie seethes. 
"I fucking hate you," he says, but doesn't stop her from saying what she wants to. He just looks away and Steve observes his cheeks going progressively redder. 
"Eddie knows my cheering routine by heart."
Eddie makes a displeased sound in his throat and refuses to look back at him. 
"Really?" Robin sounds impressed. "So you guys can perform together?"
"Yup. And we do. My cheer squad fucking hates it."
Steve can't help but imagine him among the cheerleaders, in a matching dress. It would show off most of his hairy thighs, and his long legs. He'd have to tie his hair up like today so they don't go in the way while he's jumping and cheering for Steve's team, pompom's shaking, skirt flipping up when he spins—
"Where the fuck did your mind just go?" Eddie's voice brings him back to reality. His face is still red, but his eyes are now narrowed in an attempt to look threatening. 
"Can I see it?" he asks in lieu of an answer, though it's probably enough to clue him in. "In a cheer outfit, preferably?"
Eddie starts to sputter out protests, but Chrissy grins mischievously at Steve. 
"I can make that happen."
He knew he was going to love her. 
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sugarbbgrl · 6 months
Text
Got Yourself a Bad Habit
I'm tipsy, h word and hoping this doesn't come out too shitty :3
WARNING: MDNI, 18+
cw: enemies to lovers, pnv, insults
wc: 1355
└── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──┘
It’s a constant battle between the two of you, every damn day. No amount of peace in the world could get you to stop irritating each other from your respected apartments.
The first week he moved in was the last time you knew tranquility. You’d think you would make peace with each other and then move of with you lives. But then, BAM, two years later and there still seems to be a problem everyday.
You can't play your music without John hammering his fist into the wall adjacent to you. It interrupts your spring cleaning and is more obnoxious than the music itself. But the volume doesn't falter no matter how much he complains
Until a knock at your door disrupts you. Well, more of a bang on your door.
"What?" You say, opening the door to see a red faced John Price at your door with his hands on his hips.
"Did you not hear my complaints to turn that shit down?" His chest heaves in anger as his voice booms through the air, his British accent more gruff than usual.
“Oh.. That was you?." You smirk and lean against your door frame, taking a sip from your coffee. “Thought is was someone’s dog yapping.”
“It’s nine o’clock in the fucking morning, Y/N.” John point s finger at you. “Turn that shit down.”
“Mmm..” You trail off as you fake a thought, tapping on your chin with your free hand. “No.” You slam the door in his face.
“You’re a right cunt!” His muffled curses could be barely heard through the closed door as you turned the music up a little bit more. Banging continued against as Bad Habit by The Kooks began playing, until your front door was slammed open by a, now, fuming John Price.
“Hey! You’re going to pay for the damages, asshole!” You screamed at him as he stormed into the threshold. Price made his way to your speaker and hit the power button, you music coming to an abrupt halt.
"I told you to turn this horseshit off, Y/N!" He yelled, solid chest heaving from the short and angry breaths.
"What's your problem, John?!" You scream at him, walking closer to him. "It's just music! I'm allowed to play whatever I want and whatever time I want and there's nothing you can fucking do about it!" You poke at his solid chest, digging you finger in harder more each time. You stare into each other's eyes for a few seconds longer before you mauver your way around him and turn your speaker on once more
"You're so fucking infuriating!" He barks at your back as you scroll through your songs. You smirk as you settle on Something in Your Mouth by Nickelback, really trying to elicit a reaction out of the fuming man behind you.
Suddenly, large hands twist your around by your waist. You're now chest to chest with John, both breathing heavy and tension to light around the both of you as he crashes his lips against your mouth.
A muffled yelp escapes you cover lips, eyes widening sightly before squeezing shut as you kiss him back with the same amount of force. Your hands move along his broad shoulders to the back of his head, gripping the soft strands in your fist.
You can't lie, you've been dreaming of the day you get to have some physical interaction with your neighbor, John is a sight for sore eyes; wide, muscled back, pretty eyes, and a slight sense of humor when he wants it to break through. Even with his annoying "rules" of no music past a certain time, you've always been attracted to the Brit now roaming your body with his rough hands.
The kiss was more than you could've ever imagined. Intense was the best word to best describe it. Teeth clashing lightly, tongues intertwined and short breaths between.
"You piss me off far more than you could imagine." He speaks into your mouth, ending the sentence with a tight squeeze of your ass in his hands. You can feel your pussy begin to soak your underwear at the rough action, causing a quiet moan to push it self against his lips.
"Fuck you.." Your mumble, his kisses trialing form your mouth and to your neck.
"Yeah? You think so?" John stops his attack and spin your around, pressing your body against the nearest wall. "Why don't you try me, slut."
John spreads your legs with his knee and yanks your shorts down with lustful force, taking no time to cup your cunt with his large hand. You sharply inhale at the sudden contact, your pussy clenches against him as he brings his hand to your clit, taking two fingers to rub circles onto it. You force your ass against him at the feeling, your arousal drenching his fingers.
"So fucking wet.. All for me?" You hear his voice from behind you trail and an unzipping of his jeans.
"You fucking wish." You exhale as his tip lines up with your entrance, running it along slowly with his fingers still focusing on your slit. John pushes himself into your opening slowly, hissing at the tightness of you.
"Jesus fucking Christ." John bottoms out into you, nuzzling his nose into your neck and kisses the back of your neck once more, "If I would've known you were this ready I would've done something sooner."
He slowly pulls himself out of you before pushing back in with just as much force, as if savoring the warm feeling of you around him. You sigh as he bottoms out once more, pushing his chest to your back, more heat roaming around the both of you, His fingers still touch your small bud, retracting and thrusting once more.
"You wouldn't know what to do even if it was in front of you." You breathlessly chuckle, savoring the feeling of his thick in your. A locw growl emanates from deep within in, his other hand snaking its way through your hair and grips the crown. You look at him as he forces your head back, mouth open and doe eyes capturing his attention. John keeps a steady pace now, sliding in and out of your with ease and rests his mouth on top of your head.
HIs cock grows harder as he impales your harder, hushes moans pushing past his lips with every movement. You can feel yoursekf growing wetter as he tightens his grip on your scalp, closing your eyes to fully immerse yourself in the pleasure.
"You have no idea how long I've wanted to fuck the living shit out of you." He breathes, picking his pace up more and more as time rolls by. "Watching you take your trash out in skimpy little shorts and a tank top without a bra. You could make any man forget everything.
You can feel your climax approaching faster and faster, opening your eyes once more to meet his.. Eyes linger longer this time, breaths quickening pace, He places a quick yet gentle kiss to your forehead, lips lingering a bit longer than expected. His cock hardens further at the moans you shamelessly let go, finally letting yourself feeling everything in this moment.
Your orgasm rip through you, a yelp and a shiver running through your entire body. Your legs shake as he keeps the same pace causing your eyes to roll back. He pushes your head against the wall as your body gives into the intense feeling coming over you.
"Fucking shit,," John hisses, releasing our head and running his hand along your back before landing on your waist, gripping both side with force. He comes not to long after you, puling out to spray his ejaculate along your backside. Deep moans ringing in your ears as you attempt to recover form your own climax.
Banging on the wall from your neighbor on the opposite side sounds through your place, breathless chuckles coming from the both of you as you both sit and process the interaction between you two,
"Well, maybe you should turn your music up louder next time."
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