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#i do not like to think about what may be under there
luveline · 2 days
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can I pls pls pls get an other single dad Spencer I'm on my knees here jade baby! I would love a fic where they r dating and reader comes over and basically Amy is like ur his gf?? But I thought u were my best friend?! And she's upset and reader is just like babe I can be both! Obvs we r bffs! And then May be she asks Spencer if she can take amy out of ice cream or something just the girls
thank you for your request! fem, 1.4k
Peeling Amy’s grapes is a repetitive, calming task. You press your nail to the top of the grape where the stalk had been, carving away a sliver of the fruit as you pinch the skin and pull. It comes away in small, triangular pieces that you put in the bowl on your lap. 
You put the naked grape in Amy’s hand. They’re seedless, so all she has to do is chew. 
“Thank you,” she says, distracted by the TV. 
“You’re welcome.” You move to another grape. 
You’re sitting together on the couch in Spencer’s apartment. Spencer sits at the dining table across the way, writing a letter, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration. Bright afternoon sunlight ebbs in through the window behind the kitchen sink to kiss his arms and illuminate his workspace, a beam of it catching his arm, his fine hairs like strands of gold. 
“Spence?”
“Yeah?” 
“Are we still going to the library?” 
“Yeah…” His writing gets very fast. He finishes it off with a smile and a resounding period, picking the paper up and folding it in a clean half. “I can post my letter at the same time.” 
You watch him give his hair a vigorous scratching as he stands. “I’m gonna go get a sweater,” he says, making for his bedroom. 
You follow him until he’s gone. Amy hums, kid-talk for please pay attention to me. 
“Oh, sorry. Forgot your grapes.” 
“Why do you look at him like that?” 
You smile shyly. “Uh, like what?” 
Her brown eyes widen as her eyebrows pinch together. “I don’t know. You looked at him for a long time.” 
“I guess I like looking at him, ‘cos I really like him. You’re beautiful because of so many things, but your dad is part of the reason. He’s beautiful, so you’re beautiful.” 
She wrinkles her nose, but she’s smiling. “You really like him?” she whispers. 
“Of course I do,” you whisper back, “he’s my boyfriend.” 
Amy winces hard. “What?” she asks. 
She’s suddenly and emphatically incredulous. You take her hand, but she takes it right back and stands up on the couch. She gives you a weird look as she backs away, sitting heavily on the armrest. “He’s your boyfriend?” 
“Why do you think I’m always here these days?” 
You know you’ve said the complete wrong thing the moment it leaves your mouth. You’re honestly shocked she didn’t know; Amy is a very smart little girl, and you were under the impression she knew about you and her father being a couple. But she’s also just a little girl, with big feelings. 
“I thought you were here to see me,” she says softly. 
You push the bowl of grapes across the coffee table, remorseful. “Amy, I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. I come here to see you, too, of course I do, I love spending time with you.” 
Her eyes fill with tears. She’s not a crocodile crier, at least not when you’re around. You know these to be the genuine deal, and that makes it much worse for you. 
“Babe, I’m sorry! I really didn’t mean it like that, I promise. I’m here to see you, too, it’s not just to see your dad.” 
“Because we’re best friends,” she says. 
“Of course we are.” You open your hands. “Of course.” 
She finally takes your hands, despite her tears. Her face has turned dark with a hot flush, embarrassment twisting her lips into an expression that turns your heart. 
“I’m sorry for what I said,” you whisper. “Can you forgive me? You’re so important to me, Amanda.” 
Spencer appears behind her looking like a deer caught in bright headlights. You ignore him, giving Amy’s fingers a rolling squeeze. 
“I thought we were best friends– and– and–” She sucks in a shaky breath as a fresh crest of tears fall. “I thought you were here to see me.” 
“I am here to see you.” 
You’ve done loads of things with Amy without Spencer’s involvement. If he sleeps in, you and Amy watch cartoons together in your pyjamas eating breakfast burritos. You’ve babysat her on short notice, you had her for a sleepover once so he could give a talk in Michigan. You and Amy do tons of things without her father, like eating peeled grapes, and jigsaw puzzles while he reads, and girl talk. You cuddle. 
Poor girl. 
“Amy, I love you.” 
“You do?” 
“So much!” You wipe the tears from her chin. 
“I didn’t know that– that dad was your boyfriend,” she says bashfully. 
“Me and your dad started as best friends, that’s why. He’s my second bestest friend ever.” 
“Who’s number one?” she asks. 
You poke her chest gently. “Who do you think?” 
She nods and looks down. She wipes her cheeks, and that’s what upsets you the most in the whole ordeal. Her hands look small and uncoordinated. 
“You okay, angel?” Spencer asks, coming up from behind to hug her. 
“Sorry,” she says. 
“It’s okay. Crying is okay,” he murmurs. “What happened?” 
“I didn’t know you were boyfriend and girlfriend.” 
“I’m sorry, I thought you knew,” Spencer says, giving her arm a soft up and down, “when I told you we were dating I should’ve been more clear about what that means. I’m very sorry we confused you.” 
“It’s good!” she says, sniffling, pressing a little sob into Spencer’s chest. 
You bite your cheek. You really hadn’t meant to do this to her, just she’s as empathetic as her father. She’s a bubbling mess against him. 
You look at Spencer. It’s your fault, you misspoke, and you’re asking him to save you as a kindness. 
“What’s making you cry, sweetheart?” he whispers, pulling her right into his chest. 
“I just wanted to be her best friend.” 
“You are,” he whispers, nose against her temple, “I might be her boyfriend, but you think she likes me so much she’s here every single weekend? No way. She sees me every day at work, she doesn’t need to come over if all she wants to do is see me. But you know who she doesn’t see at work?” 
“Me…” 
“Exactly. She comes here every weekend to be with you, so we can all be together. Okay?” 
“Okay,” she says, taking in another shaky breath. 
“Are you crying because you’re still upset, or because it’s just a feeling?” he asks softly, slowly. “It’s okay if you’re still sad, but maybe we need to have some water?” 
“Okay,” she says, stretching it into one big cry. 
“Could I give you a hug?” you ask. You’re lost. 
She nods. Spencer says, “Okay, you guys hug and I’ll go get my Amy a glass of water.” 
You fold Amy into an embrace carefully. She’s heavy with her upset but she wants the hug, her arms at your sides as she rubs her nose against your shoulder. “Amy,” You say, taking a pause to brush her hair from her warm neck, “I’m sorry, angel. I really am. I didn’t mean to upset you.” 
She sounds just like her dad as she replies. “I didn’t mean to cry.” 
“Well, that’s okay! If I thought you didn’t want to be my friend either I would be just as upset.” 
“You would?” 
“Amy, do you know how much I love seeing you? I would sit here and watch TV and peel grapes with you every day of the week, I’d love to…” You hope Spencer won’t mind what you’re about to suggest. “In fact, maybe you and I need to do more things together, what do you think? When was the last time we went to Penny’s Ice Cream Parlour?” 
She looks up at you with love and apt suspicion. “You just want me to feel better.” 
“Of course I do. I should be allowed to take my favourite girl for ice cream, right?” 
Spencer hesitates in the kitchen with the fairy glass half full. You’re stroking Amy’s hair away from her neck, so sorry, and so lovely. He couldn’t want anything more in life than Amy, but if he got to choose, he would love to have you, and to have you treat her as you are now, nothing but affection in your touch as you soothe her overstimulation. “We can go alone?” Amy asks. 
“Sure, bubby, we can go just you and me. Banana splits?” 
Spencer loves her, but he loves ice cream, too. “Wait, why can’t I come?”
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ham1lton · 2 days
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NASTY GIRL!
— pairings: oscar piastri x reader.
— faceclaim: rihanna <3
— summary: slut, whore, bitch - all the words that have been used to describe famous party girl yn yln. so when you show up to the grid with a shiny diamond ring on your hand, people are trying to figure out just who would choose you.
— warnings: misogynistic language and attitudes about yn’s behaviour and actions. not from any of the main characters in this au though!
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enews: y/n may not be releasing new music anytime soon, but she’s definitely making waves—this time under the sea. the party girl was spotted scuba diving in italy with her usual mixed-gender crew, proving once again that vacationing is her real full-time job. 🎶 or should we say, lack of? #priorities #wherethemusicat?
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badgalyn: y’all stay on my dick 😭 hop off.
-> user1: LMFAOOOOOO
user2: can a girl not holiday now?
user3: idgaf if she’s partying. she’s been working since she was 16. have a mimosa for me babe <3
-> user4: bffr. she just sings into a mic for a living. that’s not a job.
-> user5: every job is a job. and every job has it’s downsides. she’s been touring every year since her debut almost ten years ago. let her breathe 😭
────── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ──────
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liked by ynupdates, ferrarigirlies and 2,737,839 others.
f1gossip: look who’s in the ferrari garage today! the singer/songwriter yn on break from… well, her eternal break. and what is that we saw on her hot girl walk through the paddock? a diamond ring? oop 🙊
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user1: LEAVE YN ALONE !1!1!1!111
user2: she’s engaged to charles and they’re gonna have the most gorgeous kids!!
-> user3: um… could be carlos?
-> user2: no 😜
user3: nahhhhh no way she’s engaged 😷
-> user4: like c’mon. it’s probably a rich ceo from behind the scenes. no self respecting f1 driver would want HER 😒
-> user5: like who would actually marry her?
-> user6: u sound so miserable 😭
-> user7: like what fucking weirdos LMFAO 😭 focus on yourselves.
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liked by ynsgirlie, oscarspiastri and 1,108,890 others.
ham1ltonshaderoom: singer/songwriter yn was invited by ferrari to watch the baku grand prix but was seen relaxing in the mclaren garage after a photo op. the moment went viral on social media, what do you think of yn’s disappearance ham1ltons?
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user1: idgaf. she can do whatever she wants.
user2: she’s so fucking ungrateful my god.
user3: love her!!!!
user4: who cares?? i just wanna know who put that ring on her finger???
user5: RELEASE THE ALBUM @/BADGALYN
-> user6: RELEASE THAT SHIT NOWW
badgalyn: is it illegal for me to move from place to place now? like damn 😭
-> user7: they stay on ur ass like
-> user8: WHO DOES THAT BIG FAT RING BELONG TO ?!!?!!
-> user8: I KNOW U SEE THIS SHIT
-> user8: ANSWER ME 😭😭
────── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ──────
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liked by landonorris, badgalyn and 1,090,123 others.
f1: oscar piastri is your ‘24 baku grand prix winner!
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user1: OSCAR GIRLIES EVERYWHERE CHEERED
user2: YASSSSSSSS
user3: SO PROUD WOOOOOOO
user4: YN WHAT ARE U DOING HERE 😭
nicolepiastri: that’s my son btw 🍾🥂
user5: DID Y’ALL SEE YN RUNNING OUT TO KISS OSCAR?????
-> user6: WHAT?2&2&
-> user7: GIRL IT’S ALL OVER TWT
-> user7: https://twitter.com/ynsgirl/status/827373832992125
-> user8: oh… they in love frfr
-> user9: SICK OMG SICK SICK SICK
-> user9: HATE SEEING HAPPY COUPLES
-> user10: the way he carries her?? ims ick
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INTERVIEW W/ YN YLN.
by james collins.
she walks into the room like she owns it, a diamond-studded one of a kind necklace hanging off her neck, and a confidence that can only come from being at the top of her game. y/n yln is more than just a household name at this point—she’s a cultural phenomenon. whether it's topping the charts, turning heads with her bold fashion choices, or making headlines for her unapologetic lifestyle, y/n is everywhere.
GQ: let’s get right into it. you’ve never been one to shy away from controversy. you've been called everything from a "party girl" to… well, a lot worse. how do you deal with the constant slut-shaming?
Y/N: (laughs) i mean, what can i say? people are gonna talk whether i’m out at the club or chilling at home in sweats. they see me having fun, and they can’t handle it. honestly, i don’t care. i love my life. if i want to party, i’ll party. if i want to make a million-dollar deal the next morning, i’ll do that too. being called a slut? whatever. it’s just a word. a word can’t hold me down.
GQ: that’s the attitude that’s made you so iconic. but it seems like the more successful you get, the more people try to tear you down. how do you stay grounded amidst all the noise?
Y/N: honestly, it’s all about knowing who you are. like, i know what i bring to the table. the opinions of strangers on the internet? they don’t pay my bills, they don’t run my career. i’ve got a solid circle around me—my family, my team, my people. they keep it real with me, and that’s what matters. plus, i’ve got my own inner voice. if i let every hater get to me, i wouldn’t be where i am now. you gotta block out the noise and keep doing you.
GQ: you’re definitely doing that, and it shows in your music. speaking of which, your last album broke records and you’ve hinted that the next one’s even more personal. what’s the inspiration behind it?
Y/N: oh, this next album is gonna hit different. it’s like a reflection of the last few years—everything i’ve been through, the highs, the lows, and the lessons. i’ve been writing a lot about love, discovery, identity, and power. there’s a track on there that’s straight-up about how people have tried to label me my whole life, and i’m just like, ‘f**k that, i define me.’ there’s some deep stuff in there, but also bangers that’ll make you wanna dance your ass off. it’s a mix, just like me.
GQ: there’s been a lot of talk about one specific song that fans think is about your alleged relationship. care to spill the tea on that?
YN: (smiling) oh, you mean *that* song? (laughs) yeah, people are good at picking up on things. look, i’m not saying too much, but let’s just say it’s a vibe. relationships—especially when you’re in the spotlight—are complicated, and i’m not afraid to write about it. but you’ll have to listen to the track to get the full story.
GQ: fair enough. now, let’s address the gorgeous and expensive elephant in the room—that ring. fans have been speculating non-stop about your engagement. can you confirm or deny the rumors?
Y/N: (grinning) ah, you’re nosy! but yeah, the ring’s real, and it’s from someone very special. look, i’ve never been one to hide anything, but i also love keeping certain things close to my chest. all i’m saying is… things are good. real good.
GQ: the internet’s been trying to piece it together, especially after you were spotted at the mclaren paddock with oscar piastri. any comments on that?
YN: (laughs) you are really trying to get me in trouble! look, i support my friends, i show up for them, and they show up for me. that’s all i’m saying for now. but if people want to talk, let them talk. i’m busy living my life.
GQ: fair enough! last question—what’s next for y/n yln?
Y/N: taking over the world, obviously. (laughs) but for real, the album is coming soon, and i’m working on some new projects that’ll surprise a lot of people. i’m not just a singer, i’m building an empire. music, fashion, business—it’s all on the horizon. so, buckle up, we’re just getting started.
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tagged: @/badgalyn
liked by ynswifey, ham1ltonshaderoom and 4,938,983 others
gqmagazine: from island girl to international superstar: our newest covergirl yn yln talks slutshaming, her upcoming album and wedding rumours in this months gq magazine. link in bio! 🔗
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oscarpiastri: real good is an understatement 😉
-> user1: WHAT)2&/@/
-> user2: yn being all cryptic and oscar straight up like ‘yeah we together and what about it?’
-> user3: OSCAR HELLO?2&2
landonorris: am i invited to the wedding?
-> landonorris: hellloooo @/badgalyn????
-> landonorris: i’m sosoooooo drunk @/badgalyn
-> landonorris: YYYYYNNNNNNN 😭😭😭
user4: she’s such a bad bitch idgaf
-> user5: ‘i love my life. if i want to party, i’ll party. if i want to make a million-dollar deal the next morning, i’ll do that too. being called a slut? whatever. it’s just a word. a word can’t hold me down.’ — AS YOU SHOULD QUEEN!!!!
user6: y’all … oscaryn is growing on me fr
user7: this is so wattpad trope i love this for them
user8: YN RELEASE THE ALBUM!!!!
user9: MIC DROP FROM OSCAR YUP YUP!
user10: she’s so gorgeous… her face card omg
user11: Y/N YLN AND OSCAR FREAKING PIASTRI ARE ENGAGED AND CONFIRMED IT IN THE MOST CASUAL WAY?? HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FUNCTION TODAY?!?!
user12: oscaryn engagement. yn6 being in the works. more pics of yn’s face card. ynnies, we won today.
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— oscar taglist: @papayadays @assholeinatrenchcoat @mxdi0 @lillysbigwilly @liberty-barnes @yelenasloverrrrr @hiireadstuff @starz4me1 @mvk1ma @lozzamez3 @dear-fifi @ihtscuddlesbeeetchx3 @styl1shl1v @whyamireadingthis @halleest @s4misbetter @llando4norris @chezmardybum @ivyvlair @isthatacandle @luvsforme @fabulouskk01 @littlegrapejuice @anotherblackreader @laur20a23 @greantii @sumlovesjude @sageispunk @mindless-rock @mehrmonga @ravisinghs-wife @six-call @notyaslol @1-800-love-me @nzygftoji @dilflover44 @ilivbullyingjeongin (all works taglist in comments/reblog. if you see yourself tagged and you don’t want to be or you don’t see yourself tagged and you want to be — refill out the taglist in my pinned post! <3)
────── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ──────
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naturesapphic · 2 days
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Hi! Would you be able to do a CEO!older!Natasha romanoff x Younger!fem!reader fic where reader is part of a startup advertising company while nat is the feared CEO of a well known advertising company and both met in a fancy wine bar only find out they’re business rivals in the advertising industry. Fluffy and some steamy smut please
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Business rivals
CEO!older!natasha romanoff x young!fem!reader
Warnings: strict nat, fluff, smut
Word count: 1,002 :)
Walking into the bar, you were hit with the smell of alcohol and some type of fancy perfume. You walked up to the bar and sat down and ordered a strawberry martini. Feeling a presence behind you, you looked behind you to see a beautiful red head in a black suit and tie. “May I seat here?” She asks in a strict but kind voice. You gave her a smile and nodded your head. The red head smiled back and sat down next to you. “What are you having sweetheart?” The red head asked and you chuckled at the pet name she gave you. “A strawberry martini.” You replied and she shook her head. “Why don’t I buy you something stronger hm?” She suggested and you shook your head.
“No thank you. I need to stay as sober as I can. I have to go to work tomorrow.” You explained to her and she nodded in understanding. "I have work too but ! can just call out if I really need to." She smirked as she called over the bartender and ordered a bottle of vodka. Your eyes widen in surprise at her choice of alcohol and she just gave you a playful smirk and wink. The two of you talked for hours at the bar and learned so much about each other but what she was about to say now was something you weren’t expecting her to say. “I’m actually the CEO of stark advertising.” She confessed and you felt your whole face turn pale at her words. The redhead noticed how your whole demeanor change and she asked what was wrong.
“You work for stark advertising. You are Natalia Romanov, You are my rival!” You exclaimed with wide eyes and Natasha’s eyes widen themselves. “Shit…” she muttered under her breath while you sat there dumbfounded. “You are feared and an asshole..but getting to know you…the real you…I don’t see it…” you confessed to her and she looked into your eyes with a mix of mischievousness and softness in them. She got a little bit closer to you and carefully took one of your hands in hers, making you look up at her. “I really like you y/n. If you could just give me a chance…we can even go back to my place tonight if you want.” She suggested and you nodded, deciding to give her a chance.
~ at the house ~
You didn’t know how you were half naked on her bed with her on top of you but that’s what’s happening. Lips are connected and moving as you swiftly take off Natasha’s clothes. She was completely bare, her pale skin gleaming in the lamp light that was shining on the bedside table near the bed. Her short red hair that sits on her shoulders frames her face. You were in awe of her and she interrupted your admiration but leaning down and kissing your neck sloppily. You were a complete mess and she was barely doing anything to you. Natasha while kissing your neck and leaving hickies behind, was busy taking the rest of your clothes off, leaving you fully naked as well. Her bare body pressed up against your had you spiraling and not thinking straight.
Her gentle but yet firm touches and the smell of her hair, the softness of her body, the noises that come out of her mouth when you hit a certain spot, had both of you in a frenzy. Natasha was satisfied with your neck and started leaving kisses down to your breast. Your nipples harden by the coldness that filled the room and she took one of your pink buds between her lips, suckling softly. You bit your lip at the sensation and gently raised your hand to run your fingers through her red locks making her eyes snap up at you. She sucked on both of your nipples before kissing down to your stomach to your pelvis. She kisses all over your thighs until she got to your dripping cunt. Using her index and middle finger, she spread opened your lips, revealing your wetness and your throbbing hole.
Natasha smirked and licked her lips. “Is this all for me doll?” She said huskily that made your pussy clench. “Y-yes nat…all for you..” you whimper out, causing her to chuckle. She leaned down and attached her lips around your clit, sucking harshly. You let out a strangled breath and you shut your eyes tightly, feeling the pleasure all through your body, like a shock. She lapped at your pussy then went back to sucking on your clit, mixing the two together to get you to orgasm quickly. Which happened because not even a few minutes later you felt the tightness in your stomach and you let go. You came all in her mouth and Natasha greedily lapped it all up, not leaving a drop behind. You panted in the middle of the bed, recovering from the orgasm that nat just gave you.
“Fuck nat…” you breath out and Natasha let out a chuckle as she goes up and lays beside you, pulling your sweaty body to hers. “That was amazing.” You tell her as you roll over to face her, her arms still wrapped around your body. “I’m glad it was…” she said softly as she moves some of your sweaty strands of hair away from your face, causing your face to heat up. The two of you laid there admiring each other until y’all fell asleep in each others arms.
A/n: I haven’t been very good with endings but thank you @unlady-like-12-25-36 for the request! I hope you enjoyed it and that everyone else did too! Remember to stay hydrated and to rest! Take care of yourselves. I love y’all :) special thing coming up this week ;)
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rustedhearts · 1 day
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somebody told me (fratboy!steve harrington x fem!reader)
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summary: steve has made it very clear that he doesn’t want you. but he doesn’t want anyone else to have you either.
uses she/her pronouns and female anatomy.
i want your things in my room (part one) the library record store
tags: angst, mean!steve, so much tension, yeah the football player is tim riggins in my mind and so what?! i literally wrote this months ago, enjoy <3
"heaven ain't close in a place like this"
— somebody told me, the killers
may 1st, 2009
“What the fuck are you doing here?”
It came hissed in the doorway between the second floor fraternity steps and the sticky wood paneled wall. Steve hovered above you, breath sour with beer and a new bottle dripping condensation through the hand dangling at his side. His eyes were slanted and directed down at your eyes watching him in surprise.
30 seconds ago, he cornered you against the wall after your swift trip to the bathroom. You caught eyes with him across the kitchen nearly an hour ago, and it took all this time of carefully scanning your movements when you weren’t looking for Steve to get you away from the junior you came with.
“What are you talking about?” you laughed. “It’s a party.”
“I didn’t invite you.”
You swallowed, trying not to let your good-natured grin drop. You were well aware that Steve didn’t invite you.
After he practically ran from your bedroom two weeks ago, things went radio silent between you and Steve. You texted, he didn’t answer. You called once, thought about leaving a voicemail, and spent a whole weekend crying when you realized: he didn’t want you. Someone who wants you doesn’t flee your room the way he did that night.
You were perfectly content wallowing in your idiocy for ever thinking Steve Harrington could have a special spot for you in his tiny, shriveled heart—until said junior you were attending tonight’s party with saw you at the dining hall.
You were studying late into the evening, sitting all alone at a table near the fireplace with your books sprawled out and your picked-at dinner in scraps. He came staggering in with a band of other men, all sweaty and half-dressed from practice. He was a linebacker on the football team, and he looked damn good easing into the chair across from you and making it squeak.
His name was Tim and he had a handsome smile, and a slow way of talking in this Texan drawl that had you blushing. For the ten minutes he sat and talked to you and asked you what you were so focused on, you forgot all about Steve.
You texted for a week, grabbed a few lunches and coffees together, and now here you were. At a frat party, invited not by Steve—but Tim.
“I know that,” you told Steve, pulling your arms up to fold them over your chest. Steve’s eyes flashed down to your breasts cupped under a black lace bra peeking through a red shirt.
“I came with Tim.”
Steve screwed up his nose, pulling back a little. “Tim? Tim who?”
Huffing, you pushed yourself off the wall and pressed Steve back by the shoulder. “Tim, Steve. Now, excuse me, but I’m gonna go find him—“
“No, hey.”
Steve snatched you by the elbow, causing you to fumble on the carpeting and narrowly miss someone heading up the steps. You gasped, stumbling into Steve still against the wall.
“Steve, what the hell?”
“‘m not done talkin’ to you.”
You glared at him, wrenching your arm away with force. “I don’t care.”
You rushed down the steps before he could speak again, head suddenly swollen with confusion, heart pounding hard in your chest. He hadn’t touched you in weeks. Hadn’t spoken to you, looked at you, so much as acknowledged you since the last time he was inside you.
All it took to get his attention was to finally attempt to move on? It was bullshit. It made your cheeks flame and your mouth line with sweetness that made your stomach coil. It wasn’t fair.
“Hey.” That soft Texan drawl called to you.
You raised your head from where you were glaring at the floor, softening when they found Tim’s green gaze. He grinned at you, still holding your red plastic cup from earlier. You retrieved it from him and allowed yourself to tuck into his side under the weight of his arm.
“You okay?”
“Yeah,” you told him. “Long bathroom line.”
Steve stepped into the fluorescents of the kitchen, weaving his way through bodies with wide, squared shoulders. He tossed a quick glance your way and shook his head as he made his way through the room. And what pissed you off most was the fact that he thought he had the right. The right to be upset, the right to think anything of you.
“Baby, you look so pretty in that lil’ top,” Tim said, tipping his chin down to you with a lopsided grin. He was a few beers in and loopy.
You grinned. “Do I?”
“Mhm. Real pretty—come gimme a kiss.”
You perked up on your toes to meet his mouth. His lips were always warm and soft and soaked in beer. Lord, college boys drank a lot. If you closed your eyes and forgot where you were, sometimes he even tasted like Steve.
But Tim always called you baby, and Tim always called you back. He walked you to class with your books in his arms and a hand on your waist, opened the door for you, and helped you into his truck when he took you for coffee.
And Steve? Steve acted like you didn’t exist if his dick wasn’t inside you.
Your tongue was just slipping past Tim’s teeth when you were torn apart by force. Tim stumbled aside, knocking you as he went and catching you quickly with a hand on your waist. Both your heads turned sharply toward the assailant.
Steve stood near the island where Tim had previously been, holding a bottle of beer and a look of nonchalance. His eyes glided from Tim’s look of surprise to your absolute glare.
“Sorry about that,” Steve said coolly. “Wasn’t watching where I was going.”
Tim resumed his spot beside you, and your body felt like it was vibrating against his. Every part of you was burning—and you couldn’t tell from what. Anger? Humiliation? Arousal? Maybe all three. You swallowed with difficulty and let Tim pull you in again. But your eyes never left Steve’s.
And his never widened from their slits. The ball of muscle near his jaw bone knotted when he clenched his teeth and it didn’t move.
“You okay, baby?” Tim’s attention was on you, and you looked away from Steve to smile at your date.
“Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine.”
The footballer had an easier lightness to him. Breezy, taking things with a grain of salt. He didn’t bother fighting Steve for his ‘mistake.’ He didn’t scold him for knocking you. He only smiled at you with a pair of pretty dimples and kissed the top of your head, arm bending around your shoulders.
“Wanna get outta here?”
Because he’d be going home with you. And it only took Tim a few moments to deduce that it was that fact alone that would drive Steve crazy. Even if you couldn’t.
You nodded, hand rubbing over his chest. You spared one more glance toward Steve, who had stepped away toward the other side of the kitchen with slow, slithering steps. He took a swig of his beer and clenched his teeth on the swallow.
“Yeah, let’s go.”
Tim held your hand on the way out, guiding you down the front steps and toward the street. Your arms swung over the pavement, and you almost felt compelled to check if Steve was watching. What the hell was wrong with you?
“So what was that?”
You peered up from the pavement to Tim’s green eyes. “What?”
He cocked his head back at the brightly-lit house dimming behind you. The music faded the further you went. He was still wearing that dimpled grin.
“Back there, with that guy.”
You inhaled, looking back toward your feet. It only took a few moments to decide that you didn’t want to lie.
“We…used to hookup. But it’s completely over, I swear.” You skirted to a stop, gathering Tim’s other hand and meeting his eye again. “He’s just being a dick about it.”
He snorted. “I sort of got that when he came from across the room to ram into me.”
A giggle burst from your mouth, but it drooped into a frown. “I’m sorry.”
Tim frowned, brows creasing. “For what? You don’t got nothin’ t’ be sorry for, pretty girl.”
The warmth pulsing in your chest you could certainly make sense of now. “Okay.”
He grinned again, dropping one of your hands to squeeze your chin affectionately. “Okay. Come on.”
You walked the rest of the way to your apartment with his heavy arm over your shoulders again. And Steve watched from the front seat of his car, knowing exactly where he was going as he peeled away from the curb.
✶ ✶
“Alright, goodnight, little lady.”
“Goodnight, Tim.”
Your voices were punctuated by the slam of a door. Quick footsteps followed, a rhythmic succession ascending the staircase. Over the creaky board on the other side of the door, then—
“What the fuck?”
It burst open to a streak of lamplight in your bedroom and one Steve Harrington shadowing it at the foot of your bed. He had your university football teddy bear in his hands. It was a gift from Tim and it had his number on the bear’s soft yellow t-shirt.
Steve leapt to his feet. “What are you doing?”
You couldn’t seem to close your mouth. It hung open as you watched Steve raise his brows and jerk his chin expectantly. He tossed his arms out on either side.
“Huh?”
You came to your senses with a hard blink. “What am I doing? What the hell are you doing? How did you get in here?”
“Same way I always get in,” he quipped.
Heat touched your cheeks as you stepped into the room and gently clamped the door shut. You snatched the teddy bear from his hand and placed it back on your desk silently. Your purse fell to the floor where you were standing.
“You didn’t answer me. What the fuck are you doing?”
“Is this about the party or Tim?” You kicked your shoes off one by one, keeping your back to Steve and his stupidly pretty face.
You had such a soft spot for pretty boys, it seemed.
“You know what? Both.”
“Okay,” you sighed, pulling the first layer of your outfit off. Steve’s eyes scanned the lace of your tank top as red fabric made its way toward the hamper. “Tim and I are seeing each other. Tim wanted to go to the party, which happened to be at your frat—alas, there we were.”
The mattress springs yipped when you bounced on the edge to pull a clean pair of socks on. You wanted to strip your jeans, too, but you didn’t want to give Steve any ideas. He was already standing there with his arms crossed and his biceps and chest all puffed and sculpted. He already had that handsome pink tinge to his cheeks: his beer blush.
“Well, it’s weird,” Steve stated.
You rolled your eyes, exhaling a snicker. “Okay, Steve. Can you leave now? I’m tired.”
Steve tapped his finger on his arm, watching you shift on the bed and feign exhaustion. He chewed his cheek for a minute before reaching for his hair.
“Well…you know I missed you, right, sweetheart?”
He dropped his hands and softened his eyes into that soft, puppy-dog pout. Your scoff was sharp and sliced through the room. Steve stepped toward the bed.
“Right.”
“No, really,” he urged, sinking into the mattress before you. “You know I was just made president, and I just got super busy, that’s all. I meant to call you.”
You tipped your head at him and stared directly into those faux-pleading hazels. "How come everything you say to me sounds like a line, Steve?"
Steve sat unblinking for a moment. Then his cheeks colored a rosy shade, and he covered it with a cruel scoff and another sweep of his hair.
"What? Come on, you-you know I like you."
You pushed off the bed, head shaking. That warmth was slowly but surely returning to your body in violent form. You pulled your hair off your neck and padded toward the window to open it. Your room already smelled too much like Steve.
"You like playing with me," you corrected, keeping your back to him even as the mattress shrieked with his freed weight.
"You know, you're such a bitch-"
You spun around, shoving him by the chest. Steve stumbled a step back, but the smirk on his face made you regret even touching him at all.
"Get out."
"Hell no," he bit, lunging back into place. He grabbed at your arm again. "You think Tim wants you either? You think he doesn't just like playing with you? You always gave it up so easy."
Tears bubbled in the edges of your eyes. A tingling burn settled in the bridge of your nose. You shoved at him again and angled your head away from him and his sneering scowl and beer breath.
"Fuck you, Steve."
“You’re trying to replace me? Hmm?” Steve cocked his head to meet your eye, and you wished you could will away the hot tear trickling down your cheek. “That’s fine, sweetheart. I’ve got ten of you in my pocket.”
He shoved your arm away with a scowl, and you sniffled as he headed toward the door. All the hot-headed, enraged words pulsing on your tongue shriveled and died—and they were replaced with a hurt and heartbreak that was so familiar it was almost comfortable.
Yet as he opened your bedroom door, you rubbed your arm where he had held you and sniffled.
“Stay away from me, Steve.”
Door in hand, Steve turned and scoffed at you. “No problem.”
✶ ✶
You spent the next hour crying between makeup wipes and playing your radio on low. Pulled a faded grey t-shirt from your pajama drawer and tried not to look at Steve’s face rumpled at the bottom on a white t-shirt. Why hadn’t you thrown it away? He was so hard to let go.
With the football bear cradled to your chest, you wiggled under the covers and reached for the lamp. Your phone buzzed consecutively on the nightstand, causing pause. The plastic clicked on its hinges as it flipped open, and the sheets rustled when you shot up in bed.
u up?
tim is a fckn l0ser
answer
i’m sorry
The first time he called, you didn’t answer. You watched the small square light up with his name, felt the plastic shake in your palm with the force of its ring.
answer
Another call. You pressed the green button, but waited.
“Hello? Hey-hello?” His faded voice brought you from your daze.
You pressed the phone to your ear. “Hello?”
“Jesus, do you not read your texts?”
“Wh-what…why are you calling me?” Disbelief colored every syllable from your mouth.
Steve huffed. “I just…how much do you really know about this Tim guy?”
You looked at the bear sitting on your lap against the sheets. “About as much as I know about you, Steve.”
The line buzzed with quiet for a while. You played with the hem of the teddy bear’s shirt and gnawed on your lip. An ache balled in your chest when the thought of him hanging up occurred to you.
“Fair,” he said quietly.
Sighing, you shimmied under the covers again and reclined back against the headboard.
“Why are you calling me, Steve?” This time it was softer. You couldn’t give in to him anymore, but you had to hear him out. He never called you like this.
He never acted like he cared until now.
“Just…don’t wanna see you get hurt.”
You scoffed, pressing your palm against your head. Despite the way your heart pulsed with excitement, and the way your nerves locked up at the thought—you knew Steve didn’t mean any of it. He was just jealous. He wanted you as his personal plaything and he didn’t like to share.
You couldn’t swallow it anymore. You couldn’t keep biting your tongue to stay the perfect toy in hopes he might see you as more.
You had to end it.
“You already took care of that, Steve.”
You reveled in the buzzing silence of the other line for a beat.
“Goodnight,” you told him.
And you hung up the phone.
328 notes · View notes
dropsnectar · 3 days
Text
Pollen and Potions: Bee-men x afab!reader
PART THREE
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This is a longer part than the rest, but its all necessary dialogue so it should be fine. More fluffy and romance than smut, BUT!! Their will be smut in the next section! I know I said this will only be 4 parts, but it may actually be more like 5 or 6. Anyway, hope you like!
So. You were starting to learn that using large batches of magic back to back weren't ideal for a young witch's health. It seemed like you might have overdone it, as when you woke you found you had been asleep for TWO WHOLE DAYS. So. If you were going to do magic, it looked like you were going to have to pace yourself, or perhaps use LESS magic.
You put yourself to learning more about witchcraft. The thing was, your grandmother's books didn't really go into the basics, and as witches were so rare, information was hard to find. Of course, the internet was full of supposed witch spells, or frameworks, but it was like throwing dice. Some spells didn't work. Some spells took up WAY too much energy. Some were just… fine? But not what you needed. 
Next you checked out forum sites. Maybe you could find a community through that way? But all you found were psychics and tarot readers. Nice people, but not what you needed.
Whelp. Maybe you needed to look at the issue differently. The environment used to be a beautiful, thriving area. What had changed between now and then? In order to understand a magic ecosystem, you had to understand ecosystems. So, for the rest of the week you busied yourself with ecology study. It was turning out that this project you had adopted on a whim would need a lot more time and breadth of knowledge then you originally thought.
***
When you met with Rena, under Lyith’s friendly gaze, you found that the magic you had cast hadn't waned at all. The flowers had grown beautifully and continued to give magic nectar that created the best honey. Rena was beside herself. “The elders of the hive say they haven't had honey of this quality since they were children! You are really onto something here, little one.”
Rena had now gotten in the habit of calling you little one. Sure, as a Bee-man she was slightly taller than you, but not by much. Also the constant fluttering and floating didn't help. 
“You've been given permission to test your magic on our other gardens as well. As long as we are careful and continue with caution!” Rena babbled. You gave her a small smile and felt Lyiths arm on your shoulder. He laid his head on your other shoulder, leaning his fuzzy head against yours. 
“Whats wrong?”
You wiggled a little. “I'm just having a hard time brainstorming how to do this. I know I said I'd help you guys, but I might not be able to use as much magic as last time. To be honest, I don't really know much about my mana and my limits…” you explained your situation. Expecting there to be disappointment, you were surprised to find none.
“I can’t help but think… How long will this last? One spell isn’t going to cut it for that long. I want to create something that will last for you guys, but that might take a while… and doing just this took all the mana I had. I want to do better. But I don’t want to hurt myself either, especially when I don’t know how this could affect my health in the long run…” The bee-men seemed to be catching on.
“Of course, little one. We wouldn't want you to harm yourself.”
 Lyith also popped up, his voice almost in your ear.
“Us Bee-men also have something like mana. Our magic is not never ending. We would have fixed this situation ourselves if it was.”
Rena reached forward and grabbed your hand, giving it a reassuring pat. “We don't have to do anything today. We can commence whenever you'd like. Our flowers have spread out beautifully and even this is enough.”
You frowned.
“I may have to do this every spring. Or even redo it in the summer…”
“You don’t owe us anything. You are trying your best to do us a kindness. And our hive knows and sees that. We are beyond grateful to you… Its… We’ve needed…We are truly grateful.” His expression fell at the mention of his hive, his antennas drooping. Rena moved forward and held Lyith, a sad expression on her own face.
There was a pause in conversation that grew somewhat awkward.
How do I make this better? You tried to brainstorm, but only one thing came to mind. 
You went over and gave the both of them a big bear hug. It was a tense one, but you tried to adjust your emotions, instead concentrating on how fond you had grown of the two. You tried to shout it as loud as you could through your brain at them.
This seemed to break the spell, as Rena started to laugh. Lyith looked at you affectionately. 
“I know we haven't known each other long, but I just want to say, you can count on me. If you ever need to talk about anything let me know. I'll listen.”
Rena and Lyith hummed in response, returning your group hug with a long squeeze.
Long hugs. The favorite actions of a Bee-men.
After some quiet reassurances, the two of you decided to idle while the two foraged on the edge of the Wood. You walked with them and asked them as many questions you could think of. How old were they? Were they able to do other magics? You had thought Bee-men to be isolated. How come they knew so much about human culture?
Lyith was the one who answered you most of the time. It seemed that bee-man typically lived double the life of a human, with Rena and Lyith being about 45, and 51, Lyith being the oldest. They were in the same season of life as you though!
Bee-man could do some other magics(they didn't go much into what), but they specialized in making their magical honey, which fortified the health and wellbeing of a Bee-men. 
They didn’t say it outright but it seemed like the dip in magic had affected the nutrition of their food source. They kept their own bees and shared honey, but it still wasn't enough, so they had ventured out into human society to buy fruit when it was necessary. They also did trade with neighboring beast-men, the Wolfmen being happy to share their fruit for their Bee’s wax waste. I 
“What exactly do you guys do for fun though?” You asked, trying to lighten the mood.
Lyith smiled. “Late night flying is fun.”
Rena snorted. “You mean late night spying. Lyith has a habit of looking through people's windows.”
Lyith wrinkled his nose at Rena. “If they did not want to be seen they would have drawn the curtains. It's not strange, I am just curious about human life is all.”
Rena reached forward and pinched Lyiths nose. “Poor thing. So bored he must make mischief.”
You looked at Lyith with surprise. His big eyes grew in concern and he pouted at you.
“You are not going to tease me too are you? I promise, I never see anything scandalous. I'm a good little bee.” He fluttered his eyes at you.
You giggled and pushed his shoulder. 
“As long as you're not spying on me I guess it's harmless.”
Lyiths expression shifted to one of his dopey smiles. It always surprised you how innocent he could look despite his size. Was it maybe…
“So… I may have read that you guys are telepathic right?” 
Renas face changed into a smirk. 
“Yes, and?”
“ Well, have you guys ever… used your powers on me?” 
Rena snorted. Lyith gave you an unreadable expression. “We Bee-man are very particular about sharing our heads outside of our hives. But no. We haven't done anything to you if that's what you meant…”
Oh. He was pouting now.
“No! Thats not what I meant! I just… i feel so comfortable around you guys it's almost supernatural. I just. Idk. Wanted to know. Please I didn't mean anything by it!”
Lyith wrinkled his nose at you and Rena continued to seem amused. You felt helpless and got a bit upset with yourself. You did your best to calm yourself down but you were upset. You had so few friends here and you were afraid you blew it. A wave of loneliness swept through you.
Lyith was watching you the whole time, before sighing. “All will be forgiven if you give us some of those fruit tarts you made yesterday.”
You looked at him, shocked. 
“I thought you said you didn't spy on me!”
“I wasn't spying, I just happened to be foraging by the window, and smelled something amazing. It was all incidental.”
“There's sugar in the crust. Won’t your tummy get upset?”
He just smiled. Rena laughed. “He named his price. For offending us, we must get fruit tarts.”
Finally feeling better, the three of you walked(they let you walk!!!) Back to your home. You served them up your tarts, when finally the questions started coming about you. Why did you move here? Do you have any siblings? What were you like as a child?
This went on until dinner time, at which point you decided to shoo your new friends away. “ I'll be back to do the flowers tomorrow. We… we will see what I can do.” You admitted. The two of them smiled at you, hugging you tight for a good three minutes. They always lingered, nuzzling your face and hair, as if they were getting a whiff of you. You could smell their own perfume and tried not to think too much. Their goodbyes always felt so intimate. 
 Rena decided to pepper your face in kisses before they left. Lyith just rolled his eyes at her. When they drew apart you felt empty, like some piece of you was going with them.
***
As always, Lyith picked you up that morning. This time, you made sure to bring a scarf and hat, alongside emergency snacks in your bag. Where he was taking you next was a little longer of a trip, a whole ten minutes to the usual six. That was a long time when you were hurtling through the air.
You were surprised to drop into a small crowd. There were ten Bee-men present besides Rena, who seemed to be communicating silently with them. The air was full of bee noises; humming, purring, the fluttering of wings. The air smelled amazingly fresh, floral and syrupy. It was an odd smell, but it seemed to put you at ease somehow. And maybe a bit peckish.
A Beeman a whole foot and a half taller then Rena fluttered towards you. They bowed, of which you awkwardly returned before they reached forward and took your hand gently. Lyith started,
“This is Elder Bisou. He is the eldest of our hive. He is showing you respect.”
Elder Bisou smiled at you. “Little Witch, I welcome you to our territory. My human is a bit… unused. Please receive our thanks for your efforts.” He took your hand and leaned down so that it met his temple. You could feel the rush of his magic, like your mind was a fish bowl and he was putting a gentle hand on the glass. You could feel his warmth, his deep gratitude through it. 
Your back straightened and you felt water prick your eyelids. You gave him a slow nod, becoming acutely aware just how serious this whole situation actually was. Rena and Lyith had been dancing around it, but the Bee-men must be slowly starving to death. That was the only explanation for the depths of what you had felt.
“I will do my best.” Was all you could reply. 
Lyith, acting as your translator, took you to each Bee-men he could and introduced you. It seemed that some of the elders, as well as some of those who had free time had come to watch the “little witch” work. Most took your hand gently, and sent you a ghost of what their emotions were. There was a sort of film around the emotions, a barrier of sorts. Whether this was on purpose so you wouldn’t be overwhelmed, or just how their telepathy worked, you couldn't tell. 
You did your best to not let your nerves get to you as you dissected the sections of the field where you would be doing your experiments. You didn’t know how these particular flowers would take to your spell, so it was still best to be cautious. The bee-men looked on with interest.
You did your chants in a loud booming fashion, and channeled in as elegant a fashion as you could. Like always, the magic came, and the spell did its work. These flowers were different, like rainbow colored lavender. Rather than letting the magic gush through you, you let it gently trickle out, pacing yourself. When the deeds were done, you still felt sore, and you still held a headache in your temple, but there was no nausea, so growth! 
Once you were done with your work, there was a large excited buzzing throughout the forest. There was clapping, dancing, stomping of feet, pumping of many hands, whoops from Rena and Lyith. One Bee, a worker named Aidenn held a small wooden instrument in his hands and started to play. This triggered a chorus from the Bee-men. There was a harmonizing among the crowd and they started to circle each other, laughing and dancing. A circle of flying, spinning Bee-men formed.
Rena grabbed you by the waist and hoisted you onto her shoulder before joining in the circle of the dance. You giggled as you spun, feeling the giddiness in the air like it was laughing gas. That same pressure filled your mind and a part of your heart started to soar. It was intimate, but not stifling and you loved feeling so close to everyone.
You lifted your hands and, feeling in the spirit, decided to hum along. At some point Rena had taken you in her arms and held you close as they continued to fly in a circle, spinning and perrying, and switching. It was similar to square dancing, where there was a pattern to it. 
At one point, the tune changed and Lyith swooped down from above and grabbed you out of Rena’s arms. She snorted at him but let it happen, joining hands with another passing Bee-men. When Lyith gathered you in his arms, he cradled you as close as possible, surprising you. One hand was gripping firmly around your waist and the other crushing you to him. He landed on the ground, and the rest of the bee-men followed, causing something of a ballroom dance. 
“You did wonderfully today.” He breathed in your ear, causing them to redden. You pulled yourself back a bit to see his face and he was looking at you with such pride and affection it felt like a weight crushing your chest. You moved your hands from his shoulders to reach his own hands. You were shaky, but you wanted to return his feelings somehow. His palms were soft.
This caused him to laugh, a purring sort of trill coming from his throat. You couldn’t help a silly grin form on your face.
“I’m glad you came to my garden.” Was all you could think to say.
He looked at you, with those big black eyes, then reached forward and kissed you on the lips. It was only a peck, but you could feel his joy through it. 
Something complex within you, a mix of happiness, excitement, hope, all of your feelings rose up into your throat. Unable to find the words to express yourself, you took all of those big heavy emotions, wrapped them all up together and kissed him back, right there, in the middle of your makeshift dance floor.
When you pulled away Lyith looked shocked, his bottom lip hanging open. Adorable as usual. 
Rena hollered from the otherside of the gathering, sending out a big whoop. There was laughter, buzzing and an echoing whoop from some of the younger bee-men. Elder Bisou made some clicking sounds, but the sides of his mouth were slightly upturned.
It occurred to you then that you were in the middle of a group of very telepathic monster people. Your cheeks grew hot in embarrassment and you pulled away from Lyith a bit. Your shoes suddenly became very interesting. 
Lyith eventually turned your chin back up to face him. He held a small peaceful smile, before bumping his forehead to yours. He didn’t share his emotions but the affection was still there.
After you grew too tired to dance, you took a seat under a tree, munching on a granola bar. Another one of the Bee-men, a younger drone named Haven, made his way to sit next to you.
“I don’t know if it was mentioned, but honey production has picked up enormously since you agreed to help us. I haven’t felt this great in… well ever! Thank you little witch!”
“I’m not little, but thank you for saying so.” You were starting to get a bit lightheaded now, and not from the dancing. It was possible that some of the symptoms of mana sickness were surfacing a little late.
“You are strong! That is true! Even elder Bisou has said he hasn’t met a human or beastman with mana like yours!” Haven turned his voice down to a whisper, as if he was sharing a secret, “Your magic smells so much like flowers, really, its a huge blessing! In fact, I would eat you up if I could!” He laughed as if he had made a joke. He sighed and looked up dreamily at the sky. “Alas, I am saving myself for when we find our queen.” He wrapped his arms around himself, as if to fend off imaginary suitors.
You wrinkled your nose. “Queen? You don’t have a queen? Isn’t that super bad for bees, I mean bee-men?” 
Heaven tilted his head at you, reminding you of Lyith. 
“Of course. That's why we are all so small and weak.” You stared at him in shock. He put up his hands. “We are doing well though! It's been 20 years since our queen died but we are still here! Oh! There is a hive up north! Any day now, one of their queens' daughters might descend and bless us! Or.. Or we--”
“Little One! You seem like you're getting sick!” Rena Descended from above and put a hand to your forehead.
“You are far too warm! Haven, mind if I take her out of your wings?”
Heaven looked up at Rena, his face a mask of confusion. He eventually gave in though and stood up.
“I should check on Elder Bisou! He might need something!” His voice was flat, obviously fake, but he ran away- flew away with gusto.
Rena took your face into her hands, tilting your head back and forth. Your lightheadedness turned full on dizzy. Rena’s face screwed up in an annoyed expression.
“You overdid it. And after that whole speech about not knowing your limits too..” She gently put a hand on your back and picked you up princess style. You would have been embarrassed, if your brain was functioning properly. Instead your gaze fixed on Rena’s beautiful iridescent wings. The lights were so lovely and they helped ground you. Honestly, everything about Rena was lovely. Well, maybe lovely wasn’t the right word. She was rough around the edges. A tease and a know it all. But she doted on you so, it made you feel a bit overwhelmed. Your gaze shifted from her wings to her lovely nose, pretty sharp for a bee-men. 
Rena started conversing with Lyith about you, pointing her jaw and humming. Huh. Rena was actually incredibly attractive. You had known that before. Maybe it was something about how dizzy everything was. The last time you had felt this way she had been kissing you, her textured tongue pushing nectar down your thoat-
“Little One”
Your mind immediately focused. She was using a demanding tone. 
“Lyith will take you home. Next time, we will only do one spell at a time.” She leaned forward and placed her cool lips to the side of your mouth. Making you blush. Well your face was already heated so you would have blushed. “I will see you again soon. Rest.” And she was off.
You were in Lyith’s arms again. A place you were starting to get comfortable in. He stared at you for a moment, his lips pursed, then sighed loudly. He held your gaze for a moment.
“I do not like this habit you are forming. You will not get sick again, understand?” 
You nodded at him, mind hazy. Sleepy. You were sleepy. 
You didn’t register the fly home, only that the coolness felt nice. You were carried from the porch, into the living room, up the stairs, and laid on your bed. You were covered in warm, delicious blankets. 
You never saw Lyith leave before you passed out. Probably because he tucked himself in right beside you, the cool air washing over both of you from the open bedroom window.
Part Four
173 notes · View notes
eustassslut · 2 days
Note
🌈~
Hi c': I saw that your requests were open! I was wondering if it's possible to request a Luffy, Law, Kid, and Zoro(separately)(if you can't add Zoro, that's fine!) with a s/o that's basically deemed a Nobody? They have no devil fruit, no special Haki skills or some super power hidden gift. The most they can do is doodle every now and then and that's it.
The main prompt is basically their "Nobody" s/o doodles their boyfriend(s) in their spare time, and gifts them the drawings c': They know that it may not do much, but their love language is showering them in drawn sketches of them(almost like a little kid aha)
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Luffy is the biggest hype-man and supporter of any hobby you might have.
He regularly asks the other Strawhats for advice on what art supplies to buy you with his left over money.
He also keeps every sketch you've ever given him in a special box that he asked Usopp to make him so they're kept dafe. Will ask you to paint on the box so its extra special.
If you ever showed him any new sketches or doodles you've done, he'll beg you to let him keep them as well.
Whenever you draw him, he gets really happy and becomes even more hyper than normal. He'll be desperate shows everyone on the crew the doodles you've made of him.
Wants you to draw him doing literally everything, from going to the toilet and holding a bug to him as a bug and eating meat.
Repeatedly makes you promise you'll draw him reaching Laughtale and becoming King of the Pirates.
Luffy also boasts to everyone who will listen about you and randomly starts up conversations with strangers or his allies about you and your art supplies.
Frames everything...or he tries to before Nami tells him they have no space to store it all.
Carries some of drawings and doodles you've done of him everywhere so he can show off if he has a chance, he'll be fighting an old enemy and will pause to ask if they want to see something cool.
You have a fan in Crocodile now though who is quite invested in your art journey; but you're not sure if that's because of the rumours he's your boyfriend's parent or if it’s because the older man just enjoys art.
But if anyone was to interrupt or insult you by calling you a nobody or implying he deserves better, he'd go completely feral and has to be pulled away by you so he doesn't try to fight them.
Strong believer in earning the right to have dreams and earn a reputation for your skills so he doesn't really care if you're seen as a nobody (he still hates hearing it said to you or him though) because he used to be one as well when he started his journey.
Luffy is nothing but your biggest fan and he hopes everyone will one day see the same value and talent he sees in you.
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Law acts like nothing you do effects him and that you don't get under his skin, but it's always obvious upon looking closely at him just how flustered he gets each time you hand him one of your drawings.
Will just say "thank you, it's lovely" or "thank you, you're so talented my love" and give you a kiss before putting it in his desk draw, showing he appreciates it but not on the same scale as Luffy or Kid.
However, you will later find your drawings pinned to his fridge or tucked away in medical textbooks as Law uses them for motivation to work hard so he can impress you in return.
Law struggles a little bit to show love for you, having lost so many loves ones so young but he tries his best to show through his actions that he thinks you're talented and that he really appreciates being given anything you do.
Gets drunk on one occasion and cries to you about how he's scared he'll forget what his family looked like overtime, then cries harder when you ask him to describe them so you can draw them for him.
Keeps the sketches of his family and Corazon on his desk, next to a drawing of you and him since he wants everyone he loves to be together in one place.
Very much a man who uses his actions to prove he loves you and sees your talent. He'll clear out some of his medical books for any books on art he can find and always makes sure he cares a sketchbook and materials for you in case you want to draw.
At the end of the day Law loves you for you, he doesn't care if you have no devil fruit or if you're perceived as a 'nobody'. He probably even prefers that you prefer quietly sitting nearby or on the Polar Tang because it means he always knows you're safe.
He's not like Luffy though and he will not try to fight anyone if they called you one to his face but he would threaten them and reassure you in private that you're not a nobody, instead you're the most important person in his life to him.
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The king of insanely loud cringe worthy support and also gift giving back to support your hobby.
When you first show you like to draw, Kid would clear out some space in his workshop so you can have your own studio to quietly draw if need.
He sees quality time together as very important so he wants to quietly sit and do your respective hobbies together; pausing to show each other what you're both doing and exchange compliments.
Will try to copy any doodles you do and make metalwork versions out of them. Definitely makes you a necklace with a metal copy of a doodle you drew of you and him kissing.
Encourages you to paint on his bedroom walls if you want to and also to draw on tables.
Insists you sign all of your sketches and doodles so they're official.
Claims he needs to make sure he has the biggest art collection so that when you become famous he will be extra rich and he can add art collector to his long list of achievements (aka his crimes).
Definitely calls you the worst nicknames you've ever heard in your life, like his gorgeous talented artistic boopsie bear and the ball wrangler of all art. Genuinely means them as compliments to uplift you as well.
Loves giving you excuses to draw so he gives you awful prompts out of the blue and a time limit.
Kid will ask you to draw his crew so he can always have proof they sailed together and keeps those drawings in his bedroom.
Will try to frame everything he can like Luffy would, but he does have limits and eventually just invests in a big set of drawers designed for storing art.
Refuses to steal art supplies because he believes in supporting artists so he makes sure to take you art supply shopping and then leaves tips.
Casually has a very good reputation now in the art world and they all really admire you for winning him over with your art.
But thoughts and prayers for anyone who ever calls you a nobody, they're about to get beaten up almost to the brink of death. It's a bold decision to say anything about you in front of him.
Kid doesn't care if you're seen as weak or powerless and art is seen as the only thing you have going for you. He likes being able to keep you safe and protect you but recognising you're not strong (especially compared to him since he's literally a beast) is very different to seeing you as a nobody.
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Zoro is probably such a mess when it comes to supporting your hobby but he's trying his best for you and at the end of the day you know he sees you as the most important person in his life.
I feel like the first time you draw something and give it to him, its a doodle of Chopper and him on a napkin at dinner and when you sheepishly give it to him as a way of showing your affection he'd accidentally use it.
Just so oblivious that he does not realise why everyone at the table is staring at him in horror and you look like you might laugh or cry. Eventually looks down and apologises so much when he notices, claiming the stains on it make it even more special because it adds to value??
Does not understand art at all.
Zoro can tell that you're talented though and recognises your passion so he tries his best to support you with verbal praises and his actions.
However, he's so emotionally constipated its insane; literally does not how to express his affection for you without either being a sassy little bitch or just coming across insane.
Like you could mention you like roses and he'll come back the next time you dock with a full rose bush he's torn out of someone's garden by its roots, but then say you can throw it away if you want. He's just a weird feral man.
He'd probably learn how to make paper so you could have drawing materials (he also has no money so he has to adapt to the obstacles ahead).
Commissions you to draw several new horrific wanted poster versions of Sanji to torment the blonde with. Sanji can't get mad at you though because he thinks you're talented and likes that you get to practise.
Is very similar to Kid and likes when you sit in the lookout nest and quietly draw whilst he trains beside you. He does pose a little because he knows sometimes you like to draw him and he wants you to get his best angles.
Tries to call you talented every time he talks about you or talks to you. Zoro is very verbal about how incredible you are.
Will not tolerate anyone calling you a nobody (he will beat them up if you want him too) and it hurts him the most if you call yourself one because he knows what its like to feel inferior to those stronger.
You don't need to fight anyways since you have him but if you want to learn he'll teach you in exchange for more horrific Sanji doodles.
Your talent is more then enough to eventually earn a reputation anyways so who cares if you can't fight or you're weaker.
King of pep talks and reminds you constantly you don't have to be strong to be important, you just need to believe in yourself.
No matter what he's always in your corner and supports you in his own silly weird ways.
buy me a coffee | ao3 | tiktok
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gay-dorito-dust · 3 days
Note
Hi 🙂 could you write a fic about Agatha and Rio both taking an interest in reader and competing for their attention. Who they end up with up to you. Xxx
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I got issues w/ wanda stans which ultimately make me hate the character (I don’t want to but you freaks force my hand) by osmosis and I’ll just block you out cuz it’s honestly pathetic to listen to you speak.
You were cute, they both had to admit it, adorable even if they were kind enough to admit aloud. So congrats on being the object of desire of two very powerful and beautiful women. I’m jealous.
Neither Rio nor Agatha were exactly delighted to know that the other was also thriving for your affection and attention. Not. One.bit. They didn’t want to take civil either when it came to you and would boast rather loudly and confidently about how your heart was already taken as their possession.
‘You don’t have a heart to give, so why would you ever delude yourself to the idea that y/n would ever give you theirs on their own terms?’ Agatha said as Rio smirked and shrugged.
‘I do have a heart, it’s black and it beats for them as theirs does for mine, I just have to make them see that even if it means removing you from the picture.’ Rio replied but it only proved to make Agatha cackle as though she was told something funny rather than threatened. She’s had that be the case for a long, long time on multiple different accounts.
‘That’s cute but they were mine from the moment I stepped into Westview during Wanda’s…attempt to play house and acting as their wife,’ Agatha sighs. ‘Let’s just say I was given tastes of them which were sweeter than nectar.’ She smirks when she seeks the smirk on Rio’s lip was wiped off, replaced by a scowl as a perfect visual of jealously and anger overcame the face green witch.
‘Well we’re not in THAT Westview anymore my dearest Agatha,’ Rio began, ‘those memories you may try to hold over my head are long forgotten by them, besides it’s time they moved on with someone with more…potential.’ It was Agatha’s time to look annoyed and angry at Rio as she waves her hand. ‘Bye bye Aggie, we’ll be sure to send the marriage invite.’ She adds sarcastically before leaving.
Agatha, alone in the house she was trapped in for the past three or more years, took a deep breath to compose herself. If Rio wanted you, she’s going have to go through her first, after all you were hers first even if it was under the hex. You were always going to be hers before you were anyone else’s.
Agatha would try to woo you by doing things you supposedly liked during the hex, but once she realises that wasn’t the case anymore and the you in the hex was a charachuer of who you were. She knew that she had some actual work to do in order to win your heart before the black hearted Rio did.
She’d even console in Senior Scratch from time to time, tucking the rabbit in her arms and under her chin as she schemes about how she’s going to swoon you over to her.
‘Flowers did the charm once but it doesn’t exactly scream ‘ don’t make me the other woman in this relationship’ or ‘you chose me once, do that again because it’s the only correct answer.’ Agatha raised the rabbit to her eyes. ‘what do you think? Yay or nah.’
Senior scratch twitched his nose and flicked his ear.
‘You’re right, after Wanda traumatised this town, I doubt it’ll be easy getting to y/n anymore as it is getting a needle out of a haystack, but I’m not going to give them over to her.’ Agatha spat as he mind went to Rio earlier this morning, whispering rather flirty and somewhat vulgar things when told to someone with a particularly filthy mind, into your ear and smiling when you looked at her with wide eyes and a flustered face.
‘You know where to find me sweetheart, so don’t be shy.’ Rio then said as she locked eyes with Agatha as she kissed your cheek, leaving a perfect dark imprint of her lips there for anyone to see.
Rio on the other hand wasn’t afraid to saunter up to you and openly flirt with you while keeping her composure. It came to her as easily as breathing, and besides your reactions always made her smile in accomplishment, so she keeps doing it while handing you a special black rose that she conjured up just for you.
‘What’s this?’you asked.
‘A rose of course.’ Rio replied.
‘I know that but,’ you look from the flower to Rio, ‘what’s the occasion?’
Rio smiled as she walked up close to you, placing her hand over your own as she made you both squeeze the stem of the thornless rose. ‘No occasion, can I not be allowed to gift you something that will never wilt, never die, never look less perfect than the day I plucked it for you.’ Rio answered as she looked deeply into your eyes.
You smiled. ‘Thanks Rio, I promise to treasure it along with the lavenders that Agatha got me.’
Rio’s jaw twitched at the mention of the other witches name but didn’t let her annoyance be shown to you as she smiled tightly. ‘You take gifts from other women now? I’m hurt.’ You chuckled as you rested your hand on her shoulder, cussing a flicker of warmth to flow through her briefly.
‘I didn’t take Rio Vidal to be the jealous type.’ You joked, ‘besides it’s not like I can reject Agatha’s gifts, she can be very convincing.’ You add as Rio internally seethed.
‘Yes, very convincing.’ She chocked out through gritted teeth. Agatha was more of a pain in her ass than she originally thought.
‘Anyways I’ve got to go, Agatha invited me to her house for tea and snacks this afternoon but I’ll see you tomorrow for that abandoned botanical garden you told me about, see you later Rio.’ You bided the green with goodbye as you clutched the black rose to your chest as it emanated a brief green glow.
‘You think you’re winning this fight Agatha, but the wars only just begun.’ Rio spat as she watched Agatha welcome you with open arms, holding you close as she looks at Rio with a look of accomplishment.
‘Come on in dear, I have your favourites ready on the table. Senior Scratch has been missing you as of late.’ Agatha cooed as she booped you on the nose, her hand now sliding to your waist as she guides you into her home that felt familiar and smelled like lavender to ease you into a sense of comfort and warmth.
Who you end up with is up to you. (I’d want both but I’m a sucker for Kathryn Hahn and Aubrey Plaza)
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leovenuslatina · 8 hours
Text
𝒍𝒆𝒕'𝒔 𝒈𝒆𝒕 𝒊𝒕 𝒐𝒏 ✶⋆.˚
⋆.˚⟡ ࣪ ˖
THIS READING IS 18+ MDNI
⁺˚⋆。°✩₊✩°。⋆˚⁺
💓what you FS does to turn you on💓
⁺˚⋆。°✩₊✩°。⋆˚⁺
-trying something new here-
₊˚⊹ ᰔ౨ৎ₊this is just a reminder that tarot isn’t permanent or set in stone YOU decide how your life goes no one or nothing else now take a deep breath and choose the pile that calls to you ₊˚⊹ ᰔ౨ৎ₊˚⊹
(dont worry i’m still answering asks ill just i’m sending them privately now)
💋 tip ur reader 💋
₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊ ₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊ ₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊
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₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊ ₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊ ₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊
Pile One - Ace of Wands, Wheel of Fortune, Knight of Wands, Six of Pentacles
⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡
- Right off the bat your FS is always horny i don’t even know what it is it could be you or it could be that they just have so much pent up energy and you’re the only one he feels comfortable letting it all out with.
- there’s so much wand energy here and i keep hearing that song “thinking with my d!6k” like literally he just cannot keep it in his pants for you.
- to turn you on he gets all up in your space he’ll come up behind you and grind himself on you make sure you feel just how excited or horny he is for you
- your FS will whisper all the things he wants to do to you and what he wants you to do to him he’s very good at telling you what to do. very dominant
- your FS will give you gentle touches all over your body he’ll tell you how pretty or gorgeous you are and how much he’s so in love with you
- he’s very obsessed with being touchy-feely with you to turn you on
- he may even give you long massages to turn you on. he’ll probably want to relax FA you and make you guys feel close he wants you to know that it’s not just about sex when the two of you are being intimate he genuinely just loves being close to you 🥹💓
- to turn you on he’ll hold you very close he’ll definitely loveeeeeee love love having you in his lap. i just keep seeing his hands all over you. squeezing and touching and grabbing at whatever they can.
- i’m also getting your FS is such a freaking tease ! to turn you on your FS will literally touch you all over EXCEPT for exactly where you need him most.
⋅───⊱༺ ♰ ༻⊰───⋅
Pile Two - Page of Wands,Queen of Wands, The Fool, Judgment
ᡣ𐭩₊˚.⋆⁺₊
- Your Fs is very golden retriever vibes when they wanna turn you on there’s sloppy kisses all over your face and neck they’ll tell you how much they love and miss you and how they want to be near you and in you.
- their hands will be all over you trying their hardest to get your close off when he’s wants you to want him they’ll be so rushed to get you under them
- the two of you will have a very exciting and active sexual relationship and you’ll always be all over each other people around you think it’s gross but you guys are just so physically attractive to each other.
- to turn you on your future spouse will use your kinks and fantasies to his advantage he knows them very well because he knows you very well and use them to get you in the mood
- they’ll use your fantasies and kinks to get in your head and make you melt under him
- Pile 2 your FS will take turning you on as a game (not in a bad way) they’ll think it’s so easy to get you all excited and needy for him.
- they take a really relaxed approach to turning you on he likes to take his time he likes to make you feel as needy for him as he can as much as possible
- i think your FS knows you so so well that they’ll know all the little things that turn you on
- for example if you like his arms he’ll like roll his sleeves up slowly or if you like his voice he’ll whisper random things in your ear you know just to get you going
⋅───⊱༺ ♰ ༻⊰───⋅
Pile Three - Justice, King of Cup, Page of Cups
⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅
- Your FS IS FINE ASF 😤😤 like literally straight outta romance novels like riding on a white horse shirtless kind hot 🥵
- they’re very equal when it comes to freakin anything you do to them they’ll wanna do to you but 10000x better
- i think you’ll always be pretty turned on when you’re with or around your partner just because of how beautiful they but to get you going anymore they’ll pretty much follow your lead
- your Fs is the type of person to mirror you exactly they won’t do anything they think you don’t like or aren’t 100% into
- Your FS may or may not be your first sexual encounter or partner if so they teach you and show you what kinda things you like and they’ll help you explore your sexuality in all ways
- if your FS isn’t your first time they will definitely be your best and will show you just how good sex can be
- To turn you on your FS they will massage you calm you down relax you.
- you maybe the kind of person that has a specific set of needs before hopping right into bed and your FS will be very understanding about that
- Your FS Will always make sure you’re comfortable and happy and consenting before getting anything started
- Your FS is very understanding about any sort of situation you come from they won’t judge you or make you feel bad for your past or anything you make like or want him to do for you or with you.
⋅───⊱༺ ♰ ༻⊰───⋅
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star--nymph · 1 day
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thinking about how as a templar, Cullen wasn't functioning as a person. He was just a cog in a machine; a rusted, chipped one that screeched when it connected with another cog, but a cog nevertheless. Templars don't have belongings, they don't have interests, they forfeit their family, if they are allowed to marry it's under strict guidelines. the lyrium isn't just there to make the powerful, it's to make them subservient, in theory it is meant to be the leash that yanks when the templars speaks for themselves or others. You want to rebel, you want to advocate for others? The leash can be pulled, taking you further and further away from a new drought of lyrium.
no one pays a templar to think. you are there for the honor and love of the Maker and you swing your sword for Him and no one else
and when he comes out of it, what does Cullen have? His suit of armor, his sword, his mantle, maybe an under shirt and a pair of breeches, and his coin
the coin that was his one act of rebellion in his seventeen year tenure
no one wonder he says to a romance inquisition 'when it started, I hadn't considered much beyond our survival' because why would he? Templars don't have futures, they have service and they either die in service or die on the street, starved of lyrium and dignity. It's an act of rebellion in and of itself for Cullen to think he has the possibility of a future with anyone or anything
maybe that's the greatest gift an inquisitor, romanced or not, can give him--a chance to leave service and for once, be a person with dreams and desires. And what does he do when he's given that? He creates a sanctuary for other templars, so they may no what it's like to be a person as well.
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fivelila · 2 days
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Okay, people may not like Five and Lila as a couple, I get it… but what I find absolutely hilarious are posts like "oh, look what they took from us" about Lila… or "Five from S1-S3 will always be a famouse" and I'm like wtf!? 🤣
Why do these people like Five or Lila? Because he's an old man in a young body who can kill a room full of people in a few minutes? Or because Lila is a sexy rebel who does messy things? Nothing deeper?
Did we watch the same show? Cause I have a feeling we didn't.
Five never wanted to be an assassin, yes, he wanted to save his family, he wanted to save the world from the apocalypse (but that doesn't mean it was a hobby he actually enjoyed doing, he just had to) - it does not make up his whole personality. Have you noticed how frustrated he is and how he wants to be at peace and finally get some rest? No? It wasn't interesting enough, was it? The guy lived one huge trauma, the fact that he was sarcastic and obnoxious most of the time might have been "funny" but it's actually rather sad that he spent most of his life training for the UA, then was alone for forty years and then had to become a killer. Haha, he must have enjoyed life, huh?
And Lila had been under the influence of the Handler for most of her life, and in fact you could see that she was afraid of her. She herself said she was a coward, she was afraid of telling the truth, which would make her weaker, she was the one who wanted the family she didn't have (and yes, all of this was back in season three). So why are some people so shocked about S4 Lila? Among other things: you don't think a woman changes in any way after 13 years? Or did you expect her to act like a crazy teenager at 40+? Or what exactly did you expect her to do?
I think Lila could have easily been childless, but then I don't think she and Diego would have been a couple at all after a six years. Because they got back together mostly because she was pregnant. Other than that, their relationship was just based on deception and their physical attraction. Well, unfortunately, that's not something you can build a long-term relationship on in real life.
Just because some people don't like it doesn't mean it doesn't make sense.
But I understand, here most people don't care about the realism of real life, where people change their attitudes, where there is a dysfunctional relationship, where the characters want a real life… just fun and nothing deeper… okay...
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pparacxosm · 1 day
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wounded in
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(blue-eyed son part 2: electric boogaloo !!!! ; (hate to be that gal but you may have to read the first bit for context); homeless era!patrick zweig x jaded businesswoman!reader; nonlinear narrative; tw office job; tw coworkers; tw mcdonald’s; the sound of music stuff is for myself; i fucking love sound of music; and i fucking love cats (the animal not the musical, though that's lovely too) so there’s that; pushing a patrick zweig can’t spell agenda; tw new england maybe; i gave new rochelle a better rap this time; kiss scene kindaaaa ??..? ; tashi coaching patrick after new rochelle is canon to me; tw descriptions of emojis; what if i told you there’s a part 3; then what)
You hold in a bout of laughter when Patrick brings the drinks to the table.
His hair is longer than the last time you saw him, which wasn’t that long ago, in scale. In bones, in feels like a while.
Dear old New Rochelle. Far enough out that the city is a twinkle on the horizon like a cluster of stars, far enough that there are some actual stars above you, now. It’s odd to see him in New England. It’s odd to see him in jeans. But then it’s September.
There are new lines on his face already. He’s aging quicker now, as if to make a point.
Drinks are on me,
Is the first thing Patrick told you, when you walked in in a juniper parka. Scanned the room, picked out his booth.
Is this the part where you tell me you’ve opened a savings account? you said, trying to seem completely blasé about it. It would have been childish to be thrilled by such meagre chivalry at twentyeight. I feel like I should pay, you’re in my city.
Yeah, but you’ve hosted me enough for now.
That’s what you are, half the time. A host to him.
A museum. Thumbing through a rolodex of all the different shades of blue his eyes could go in one humid night.
You pass on more nights out than you accede to. You got a cat. You’re getting LASIK soon. But what it really looks like is that you’re wearing glasses to show that time has passed.
“What’re you smiling about?” Patrick asks, placing the foamy mug of beer in front of you.
You wipe discreetly under your eyes, spreading the mascara smudge. “Just thinking about how my aweinspiring generosity has rescued you from the misery of total squalor.”
Patrick chuckles. “Well, they say to pay it forward.” He sounds pleased as he lifts his own mug with a wink.
You look out the window. There’s a film of dust on it. There’s dust on the faux-chintz curtains too.
You start to wonder if that’s what he really thinks. That this is him going forward.
Patrick picks up the plastic menu. “We ordering sidedishes or do we want a full dinner? What’s good in Wellesley?”
You try to laugh, though the noise has the distinct tender hue of a sob. But you’re sure you feel mostly fine. “What are you doing here?”
“Hm?”
“What are you doing in Wellesley?”
Patrick looks up at you with bright, twinkling eyes. “Challenger in Boston. Thought it’d be a waste not to come see you.”
You clench your jaw to prevent more runny mascara. It’s stupid. You don’t much like waste either. But you’re not going to weep in front of Patrick like a child.
“You hungry?”
You nod, picking up your own menu, hiding your face behind it.
His hand reaches suddenly across the table, trying to touch yours. You pull away, but make it look like you didn’t.
“Bet you had a hard time leaving Tobes for the night,” he says, trying to lift the mood.
“Um yeah. A little. I like to imagine what she gets up to when I’m away.”
“My sister had a cat, when we were young. My sister was, like, seventeen, and I was eight, so pretty big gap.”
Because he has to clarify those sorts of things. Because you don’t know he has a sister. You don’t know anything.
You find it hard to picture him pinned down in any humane way. It’s always his beautiful leg (now sheathed in denim) writhing in a bear trap. Always his papery wings unfurled and pinned against a picture frame like a butterfly. Something metamorphosed. Something capable of a great change, and that must be tortured for it.
“She found the cat in an alleyway. She called it Patrick.”
You lift your eyes. You feel it bubbling in you like magma, the urge to coo. You feel all soft these days. And maybe that’s just open heart season, and the passage of time. But you see a vivid meridian in your life, and it falls right along the night you met this guy. And this back half is all soft, so you sort of want to blame him.
You swallow.
“Well, that’s sweet.”
Patrick lowers the menu. “Nope,” he shakes his head, that huge smirk on his face, like his name is on every ticket of the raffle, like he’s cheating at something. “Let me tell you what she used to do. She used to put the fucker in, like, a blanket, right? And she’d lift it up like a sack, with him inside, and he’d obviously start clawing and making all of these noises—“
He makes the noises. Just starts whipping his head around and making kitten growls, imitating this cat with his name. You get the sense that this is one of those anecdotes that explains a lot about a person.
“—And she’d come into my room, in, like, the middle of the night—this is real psycho shit—and she’d lift my covers and drop the cat. And the shit would fucking claw at me and bite me, just—“
He’s doing the noises again. And now he’s clawing at the air with his hands.
He stops, and the way he closes his mouth around his grin makes his teeth look like they’re trying to escape past his lips. But it looks sort of lovely.
“When the fuck died, Saskia texted me. She was like, oh, he loved you so much, you should’ve said goodbye.” He pauses, widens his eyes, looks at you with the pointed intimacy of sharing in this ludicrousness.
You roll your eyes. But you catch yourself smiling. You like the idea of him being mauled like that, skin deep. You get the sense that life has done to him a lot of that—those growls and scratches. And that sounds a little fucked. But what you like about it is how he seems so unmoved now, by this psycho shit. This flailing animal, this torture device. Pinning him down. He's laughing.
You try to imagine him as a child, but the proportions are all comically bizarre, in your mind’s eye.
“Pork chops,” you say, throwing the menu aside. “I feel like stuffing my face.”
Patrick gets three sausage egg McMuffins on the way to the New Rochelle Country Club—and fries, and a hash, and a soda—and he’s eating the second by the time you pull out of the drivethru.
There is a compelling sense of chaos to how he drives. Like, he’s so bad at driving. Three different people honk at him in a dozenminute window. And you feel content knowing that whatever had had your heart thumping last night has not shrivelled and died with the morningtime. Though now it’s maybe a partial distress for your safety. But you get the sense that, maybe, this is actually the person you are now. The woman who sleeps beside a rugged stranger and buys him breakfast and doesn’t care how he speaks with his mouth open while he’s eating the fries. Doesn’t care about the writhing mire of half chewed potato on his tongue. The way his lips gleam pink with salt.
“I need to listen to really specific music to, like, get in the zone? If you don’t mind?”
He sounds so uncharacteristically shy, for brief a moment. You have to lean forward and look to see he isn’t joking. He isn't.
“Uh— yeah, of course. It’s your car.”
He slides a Sound of Music soundtrack disc into the mouth of the dashboard.
You laugh so hard you fold over.
He’s got one hand on the wheel, and shifts is his seat, peeling the unfamiliarly clean skin of his thighs off the leather before sitting back down. He’s tearing into his third breakfast sandwich with a reckless abandon reserved for death row. He laughs around the bite, glancing, bemused, between you and the road, and, ultimately, spending more time looking at you.
“What?” he laughs around a halfmasticated mouthful. “What?”
There are tears sluicing down your face. You can’t breathe. You think you can, and then you start laughing again, and you can’t.
“How do you solve a problem like Maria?” Patrick hums cheerily as he noshes. It’s a gross and wonderful noise, the food moving between his teeth, circumventing Hammerstein.
You think the large coke is probably no performance enhancer, not only because he all but tumbles out of the car when it’s hardly halfway parked (poorly, you’ll add).
“Fuck, need to piss,” he says frenetically.
When you know the notes to sing…, carols Julie Andrews.
You’re still laughing. Crying. Your tummy fluttering painfully.
Patrick makes you order dessert too, since you’re celebrating.
Celebrating what? you had to ask, though, at the time, you were wearing an impish, knowing, frankly celebratory sort of smile.
Patrick feigned great offense. He said, I’m fucking here, aren’t I?
He wants you to have sundaes together. You spill some ice cream on your skirt. He finds that funny. He’s always got this weasel smile, like he’s constantly ready for amusement. He’s shaved, at some point between now and then. The hairs on his face are sparser. The skin on his face looks milky and organic like a crinite litchifruit.
The frumpy diner was his idea too.
He’s spent some time on the veritable extremes of the economic spectrum—that’s what life tends to be for him; veritable extremes, scratching him meanly—and now he just wants to play at being the average wage earner.
“You really are welcome to stay with me, if you’d like.”
Patrick looks at you like he’d rather shoot himself.
You sort of marvel at his sense of pride, as if it were a rare stone, swallowing light and spewing it out at all angles. The Sociology course you took in uni had a whole two modules on personal pride. It is one of the few emotions that are unique to humans.
Patrick—for his weasel smile and beastly hunger and feline anti—is remarkably proficient in being human. In the real, visceral parts of it. In wielding his emotions like kaleidoscope hues. Dancing freely in confinement.
“When are you leaving?”
“Don’t worry about that. If you have time for breakfast tomorrow, we can—”
“Mm, not tomorrow, I don’t think. But I have no plans this weekend.”
You say it with this weird, bright intonation, like you’re jesting. Which—a lot of things feel like a bit of a joke these days. But he seems to understand you well enough. Delivers a curt, unspurned nod, and even a smile. Not the weasley, chronicling one. The wolfish one that makes his eyes crinkle up.
“Come here then,” he says.
Patrick leans in for a hug. You can’t avoid it. He enfolds you in a fascinatingly soft, burning embrace. He still smells sort of musky and acrid. Like even though he can shower regularly now, he maybe doesn’t as often as he should. But you find a gross comfort that. This pleasantly fetid, human man. His cologne smells like a wine cellar.
He says, “It’s nice to see you again.”
Something churns in your belly. Maybe the pork chops. Maybe the ice cream. This whole fucking day. You accidentally deleted some files and IT spent five hours trying to help you unsheathe them from oblivion. You felt like a failure. And now you’re here and,
“Fuck, you’re still so cool.”
You push away from him with a forceful laugh.
You used to be able to tell your sister all kinds of things. But, lately, you haven’t been able to talk to anyone about anything.
Working so many years for a soulless corporate hive mind has turned you into an expert at short, polite, and meaningless feedback that only varies with inflection.
“Right”, “Sure”, “Got it”, “Whatever you think is best”, “Already on it”.
Half the time you sound illiterate. The other half, you sound like you could have written Prozac Nation.
When your sister asks, how was New Rochelle? she expects you to say something annoyingly vague and ominous in your cool, collected adjunct’s voice, like: Everything is under control.
But, instead, you say, “Do you and Mark still go to mass? I really want to start giving more of myself away.” And you’re wearing this smile that’s utterly sincere.
That’s what spooks your sister.
Of course, you want to tell her more. Because your sister married a Herman Melville character; one of those grizzly, stinky, sacerdotal men who don’t want to work but don’t want to lose either. You know your tale of Linklateresque, serendipitous connection would render her mesmerised and marginally jealous.
But, soft and charitable as you may now be, you keep it all to yourself.
Patrick is still in Massachusetts a fortnight later. You say you’d have loved to come and see him play, but you’re really busy, and he says not to sweat it. Insists really. Maybe even begs. Do not sweat it.
You text him, presumably a day or two afterwards, and ask how it went.
Smahsed it!, he texts, and garlands the (misspelled) notion with eight sunglassfaced emojis. You counted. Dibner? he texts.
Then, a moment later,
*dinner?
You get to see your first New Rochelle sunrise.
You slink out of bed with toothfairy softness, even though Patrick is sleeping the sleep of death—with a deep, miserable snore like a resounding dirge to prove it—beside you. Your pillow wall, in the night, had collapsed like Berlin in 89.
You step outside. You check your phone, first, but you do go outside. You do believe in fresh air in the mornings, even if you don’t have the fortitude for mindfulness and journaling.
The parking lot is a vast open soul. Regretfully resigned and stunningly silent.
The sky looks like a bleeding mouth, but the hard grey edges around it don’t seem to care. The concrete enterprises and litter splay do not want anything to do with this bruise. A tart, sort of sewery smell makes your eyes water.
Cars drive by too fast. 
You think, in some faraway capacity, you can hear the soft, rhythmic thunk of tennis balls hitting asphalt. But it’s only your heart.
You hear things. You see things.
You don’t want to sound like some haunted Victorian heiress with a mystical past, but you do.
In the break room, mostly.
So you hadn’t noticed before. Your coworker, Sam, goes fucking wild for tennis. Sam’s slobbering lewd and voracious over tennis. It’s hard to witness. In fact, you feel dirty witnessing this. You should call HR. Sam’s in the break room doing an onanistic oneman scene play about tennis.
Or maybe he just kind of likes it.
And you hadn’t noticed it before.
There’s a lot, for your part, that you were content not noticing around the office.
But now every errant tenniscentric commentary makes your hands feel sore and weightless without the presence of a gun.
“No, you don’t get it, Deirdre, this is like if LeBron played a game at some random Y, and got dunked on by this fuckin’ nobody, and then just… quit the game.” He sounds tumid with bewilderment. “Just fuckin’ dipped!” Sam’s incredulous. “Forever!”
“LeBron…?”
“Fuck, Deirdre, you’re killing me.”
You slot the mouth of your bottle beneath the spout of the water cooler. You close your eyes—zombieleaden, uneven on the tiles; it’s only 10—and listen to the halting trickle, trickle… stream. The plastic goes cold against your palm as the water rises.
“All because of some… fuckin’,” Sam snaps his fingers, “Fuck, I forget the name.”
Peter Zeppelin, your mind supplies dryly.
It is then that Sam chooses to notice you. Points his finger. Wide smile. “Oh-ho, here’s trouble!” says Sam.
Sam and you have had enough one on one conversations for you to list on your one free hand, and you wouldn’t be spoiled for digits. But, all the same,
“Here’s trouble!” Sam announces, “Big shot boss babe, huh? Back from kickin’ rear in New Rochelle. I know you’re glad to be back.”
You don’t say anything. You feign responsiveness, flash a stilted smile. But you don’t say anything. Because what would you say?
Outside the men’s bathroom of the New Rochelle Country Club, you fidget awkwardly, standing against a wall and trying to look inconspicuous. Patrick’s duffel sits at your heels like a staunch hound.
Your gaze meanders around the venue with an idle sense of inquiry.
You’d expected a certain echelon of grandiosity, anyway. And the country club is nice—you feel silly casting any judgement at all—if a little outdated. All glossy wood-panelling and pea green outdoor carpet.
You can see yourself, warped and bleary, upon the polished floor. The bar flourishes a glassy sheen and cloistered amber rows of lavish whiskeys.
Through glass windows, golf splays unfurl, ceaseless viridescence, beset on all sides by sharpcornered hedges.
People mill about with the air of the lookedafter, and polo shirts as white as the maw of God.
Which is nice—it’s all nice—and all, but your chest seems to enwreathe a stark state of dread. You feel the sort of nausea that would rack you as a child. Floating in the curtains at your dance recitals, like an anxious little poltergeist.
When Patrick emerges from the loo, he is whistling. Fluting finely the swooping tune of ‘Sixteen Going on Seventeen’.
“You certainly seem unburdened,” you murmur, gaze shadowing him as he draws near. You know you sound unconvinced. For his part, he looks undeterred.
Slings his bag over his shoulder like it is floatable, even as you know it bears the poundage of half a man’s life.
He grins, flashing a canine.
To you, he has just eaten his weight in greasy, leaden carbcloth, and proceeded to piss for twelve minutes straight.
But Patrick seems imbued by morningshine.
He throws a heavy arm around you, squeezes your shoulder. Says, “Look alive!” Says, “I’ve had a good night’s sleep, a hot shower, the breakfast of champions, and I’m about to get paid!”
You wince a bit at his volume, and also because he seems to be emanating a bit of that morningshine. Not to speak of the heat. Searing from his very bones.
If nothing else you admire his buoyancy. In that way, the warmth—even as the sun blooms above you—is a fascinating comfort.
Like something to be shared.
You say yes to dinner.
You keep having dinner. He keeps taking you out for dinner, and to decent places, too, places you haven’t even been to around here.
You’re sitting across from him. You’re eating, as one does. He’s regarding you with something like awe. Though you wouldn’t know it, because he regards, too, his plate, when the waiter rests it before him, with a sort of comical reverence. Even though you’re pretty sure he’s not starving, anymore.
But hunger’s not always about those sorts of things, you suppose. Maybe he's just still hungry.
He’s winning a lot. Must be, if he’s taking you out all the time, and—hey—maybe you can get him to sign something for Sam. That’d be nice of you.
Patrick watches you eat.
You try not to stare back at him. As long as you keep chewing, you won’t have to ask why he’s still here.
“That’s a nice shirt,” he says after a long silence.
You smile. “Thank you.”
He doesn’t text you for months, many months, after New Rochelle. You’d given him your number, because you wanted to put the ball in his court, and—fuck—here’s hoping you didn’t say that.
But you can’t recall.
It’s been months.
So, when you do get the text, you’re pleased to see it’s aptly contrite.
ypu probably think I’msn idiot, it reads, and it’s late at night and you’re already in bed, stewing over NYT Connections.
You eye the ID. Maybe: Patrick Zweig, but that’s implied—so many implicit little shards—because not a lot of people are so tortured by the prospect of your opinion on them so as to text you at 1 AM. So.
Define idiot, you text back.
dictionary defenition is Patrick Rupert Zweih. There’s prpbably even a lil picture of me next to it.
A few moments.
A bad one.
Ten or eleven emojis of abject terror.
You consider this—not a bad picture of him (though he doesn’t quite strike you as wildly photogenic anyway), just... This Whole Wound—and tap the side of your phonecase in tentative thought.
Your full name is Patrick Rupert Zweig? Tough.
Like ypu didnt already look me up.
You blink. Whoa—okay.
Not a humble idiot, I see, you type.
You don’t know where you get the balls. There’s a sweeping litany of long, gorgeous miles between your bed and New Rochelle, but maybe he can smell you thinking as much because,
Im in MA next week
In the registration room, a man with a binder asks his name, and Patrick sheathes his canine in a way that makes him look conspiratorial and bemused. You suppose it’s become an inside joke.
The ATP official seems to gleam with recognition when Patrick does give his name—his real name—and he says, “Oh wow, that is you!”
You can’t see his face from this angle, but you can envisage the way his moue has settled in confusion.
Apparently, the ATP official was a line judge at the Junior US Open back in 06.
You try to think back to what you were doing in 2006. Probably populating your microcosm in The Sims. Trapping little imitations of those who had scorned you in swimming pools to drown.
“You were really something back then, huh?” says the ATP official.
Your eyes flicker to Patrick’s profile. He doesn’t quite know how to respond to that.
The official hands Patrick a packet. There’s a little map of the facility in there, in case he gets lost. His first match is against one Gonzalez, on court seven.
Patrick says, marginally halting, “Hey, so, is there any chance of an advance payment on the prize money.”
The official blinks.
“Because I know I’m guaranteed a minimum of four hundred dollars even if I get knocked out today—“
You frown a bit at that. The official frowns a lot at that.
“Well,” he says, “Generally we don’t give out winnings until a player makes his way through the tournament…”
A beat.
Then,
“You could always just lose today. Then we’d have to cut you a check this evening.”
Patrick hardens to bone. You hope he has another lifeaffirming piss in him. He doesn’t meet your eyes when he turns to leave, but flicks you a glance that seems to ask that you spare him the judgement.
You leave New Rochelle today. Good as the night’s sleep may have been, he knows better than anyone that life’s loveliest things are fleeting.
So—fine—you don’t begrudge him. Instead,
“He seems hopeful,” you say wryly.
“Must’ve been thrown off by my pretty caddie,” he says dismissively. Maybe a little bristled.
The warmup courts, deep blue plane, shimmer in the sunheat.
Patrick takes the asphalt, flicks his racket around by its handgrip as though refamiliarising himself with the palmfeel for the first time in a while. Which—well—doesn’t give you confidence, at risk of contesting Julie Andrews.
He practices his serve. Starts to work the ball up and down the court. Hits a few forehands, a few backhands.
Then,
“He was lying,” he yells to the bleachers.
The bleachers are mostly empty. A few errant loiterers. Bored spectators who have finished their lunch earlier than their friends. What have you.
He’s looking at you, though. With a staggering precision from so far away.
“What?”
“That guy. He was lying. Or… bigging it up. Or whatever. I wasn’t really something, I was just decent.”
He strikes a ball over the net. You can see, from here, the vibration ricochet through the racketstrings with a shudder that has you expecting music to flutter out.
You lean back in your seat, sort of sliding down against the glossy plastic, a tremor of induced electric tickling your bum through your jeans. You cross your arms.
“That’s kind of bullshit,” you call out.
He spares you a glance, sort of doubletakes, and you can see the corner of his mouth tremble with intrigue.
He takes another ball from the basket. Tosses it up. You watch the neon starsphere spin fleetingly in the air before being walloped to oblivion. And what do you know of tennis? But you do think his serve is a thing of beauty. Beauty measured in power and precision, sure (he hits the ball straight and hard and fast and low, just barely clearing the net), but you can also see the way his muscles work beneath his skin. Which—you know.
Patrick walks to the fence that partitions the courts from the stands. He leans over, rests his arms on the palisade, and looks at you.
“This was the whole problem,” he tells you, “Everyone was always telling me how good I was. And it got to my head. And now I’m here.”
It’s a shabby imitation of humility. What it really is, is an attempt to scale down the apogee, so the fall seems less mythic. So the years seem less unkind.
“I didn’t come here to watch you sulk just because some guy was nice to you.”
Patrick grins. His cheeks are flushed with heat, and there are little spots of sweat on the hollows where his skin and bones meet. But he seems to know not to exert himself fully right now.
“You think I’m sulking?”
“I think you seem pretty torn up for a guy who’s going to play a thirty minute match, and walk away a few hundred dollars richer.”
He makes a noise like you’ve wounded him, but he seems elated.
“A few hundred dollars?” he says, raising his brows. “So you’ve lost your faith in me.”
“I have some,” you allow, and you’re not surprised to find that you really do. “Just don’t choke.”
Patrick wears the smile of a newly crowned Miss Universe. He looks touched that you’re being so frank.
“I won’t,” he says, with a sense of finality and what you feel is an incongruous tenderness. “I’m pretty good at dealing with pressure. My parents always used to take me to work with them and tell employees to come to me at random intervals with madeup highstakes scenarios. Like, pretending to have a breakdown, and saying they needed me to help them out and make the final decision. Some of them could cry on command.”
You try and fail to hide a look on your face that divulges how demented you think that anecdote is. But you try to find something neutral to say.
“Well, maybe you’re lucky,” you tell him. “I was horrifically nervous as a child.”
“Not anymore?” he asks, swinging his racket idly, and you get the sense he’s actually very interested in how you will answer.
So it’s hard not to answer him honestly.
“I don’t know,” you say finally, and you look away from his eyes, and instead at the sky. You’re alarmed to find they are precisely the same tincture of aegean. “Mostly not. But if I have to give a presentation or speak up in a meeting, I have to take one of those beta blockers, you know? Propranolol?”
You are stricken, at odd moments, in New Rochelle, in Massachusetts.
You get the sense that he’s trying to be cavalier. But, at the same time, there’s this unmistakable fragility about him. Like it wouldn’t take much to knock him down.
You are stricken by how he’s managed to maintain this cocksure swagger for so long. With such a brittle, aching core.
How easily it all might’ve been shaken by the wrong person, and the wrong word.
You love the smell of your dear kitty’s head right after a bath. The fluff of dandelions and baby bird. You love toweling her, taking her little paws in your hand and prying the toes open.
Toby pretends not to like being fussed over, but she doesn’t put up much of a fight. In fact, most nights, she falls asleep in your arms.
When he pays you the visit, Ms Tobes is breathing evenly in your arms, your thumb caressing the organtender slope of her silky head.
You open the door, and great weeping gales have been jostling your windows all evening. But he is in shorts.
Patrick’s been in New England for nearly a month.
There’s an odd sort of look on his face, and an unlit cigarette behind his ear.
Hands in his pockets, he leans against the door frame, staring down at you. You feel a remarkable heat radiating from the downy flesh of his bare legs.
He doesn’t seem confident, nor does he seem unperturbed. He seems… pensive and maybe even penitent, but he wears it with a fascinating poise. There’s still something wounded and vulnerable about the way of his shoulders, the slant of his mouth. It's the softness that kills you, anyway, you think incoherently. 
You peer up at him, dubious, through the briar of your lashes. He looks down at Toby, at the sweep of your finger over her head. You do not know if it is he or Toby who purrs.
When he speaks, he is whispering very softly, though there’s a frayed, low seep of his voice in his throat. It feels revoltingly intimate.
“When Patrick died,” he says, “The cat. I felt so shitty. I had this weird feeling of—like—I don’t know. Shittiness. Because of how Sassy said what she said. You should’ve said goodbye. What am I supposed to do with that, y’know?”
You swallow. The hallway is so vacant and noiseless you can hear the plush shuffle of his running shoes against the carpet. Dutifully beyond the boundary of your home, even though he’s been here quite a few times now.
“Patr—“ you croak.
“I’m not in Massachusetts for a game,” he tells you, shrugging hopelessly and almost smiling. But failing to. Which you register. “There’s no challenger in Boston. There’s just you. In Wellesley. All these… fucking ponds everywhere. Private schools. Bunch of rich little assholes who need a tennis coach, I bet. All these res—fuck. You know,” he shifts, taking the cigarette from his ear and gesturing with it between the two of you, “We’ve been out, like, twenty times, since I’ve been here, and there’s still, like, fifty restaurants we haven’t been to.”
You stare up at him. Your palms, where they cradle Toby, grow damp. The throbbing organ of your heart takes up residence in your throat. There’s a sad sort of clanging from the clock in the hall.
You lift one trembling finger to your lips.
Please, don’t say anything else, you beg with your eyes. Please, not in front of Toby.
Patrick’s eyes glint ruefully. Almost ominously. He seems insulted by your gesture, but he understands. He always understands. He never holds anything against anyone.
“No need for that,” he says very quietly. “I come in peace.”
He moves closer, breaking the enclave where the carpet of the hall meets the vinyl of your floor, until he is inches away.
A head taller, yet shrinking, as if you were seeing him from across a room.
He smells very good today. He smells like spice and bergamot and the laundered fabric of his navy blue halfzip. You sort of miss the musk. Of course you think of New Rochelle. You think of Bob Dylan and Hello Kitty and thermostats. Fucking Sally.
You lift your chin.
“I’m not asking you to—“
Patrick leans forward, his nose touching your nose.
“I’m gonna do the tennis,” he speaks the words into your mouth, voice like gravel melting in the sun.
You part your lips. A part of you hates him, hates how he’s insinuated himself in your life without warning. Another part, however, is asleep and betrays you.
He shushes you, though you’re sure you haven’t said anything. It’s just that you’re crying now. Completely still and silent. Weeping like the dead, because the dead weep, too.
He shakes his head, his nose brushing over yours, says shhh like you’re a cat, and, even then, Toby only stirs between your fingers.
“It’ll be good,” he says, and you’ve heard him sound convincing. You know that right now he sounds… something else. And he’s still shaking his head as he whispers, “It’ll be good, I’ll be good. I have a coach, I’m not done, I love the tennis.”
You look up at him. Lick your lips, which, when you’re so close, also means sort of licking his. Sort of licking into him. You want to say, fuck your tennis and fuck you too, but you also want to fuck him and you want to fuck his tennis, too.
You think of New Rochelle.
Patrick’s hand meanders upward toward Toby, and, if his cigarette was lit, you’d see sweeping coils of smoke floating heavenward.
It isn’t lit, but still.
You catch him quickly. You hold him by the wrist.
His skin is nauseatingly warm.
“You love it?” You sound unimpressed now. Your mouth moves over and around and against his as you speak.
“I do.”
“You love it, you love the tennis?” You’re sort of spitting it at him, and he tastes it.
And he thinks of Patrick the cat, how he lay there and was mauled. Pinned down. He thinks he’d let you draw blood, now, if you really wanted to.
“Tennis doesn’t love you.”
“Do you?”
There is time enough for you to answer. But when a sound is finally made it is only Toby, who mewls.
Patrick smiles. You feel the seam of his lips touch your lower teeth. “Didn’t think so.”
He straightens, his lips swiping your nose on his way up. He gently removes his arm from your grasp, your nails scraping is skin.
You exhale sharply. You feel stung.
Poor Toby, caught between your beating hearts. Patrick steps away. He places the cigarette between his lips, and then you do not stop him from touching Tobes. He strokes her gently.
“You got a lighter?” he asks around the cig.
There are three aflame candles in your home right now. He can smell the vanilla. You shake your head. He smiles again. Toby purrs. Patrick’s fingers touch yours between the heather fur.
You feel a strange ignition in your bones.
The game begins.
Everything is quick and violent.
You don’t know if tennis is actually quick and violent, or if that’s just him.
You are astounded by just how much a man can sweat. You are spellbound by the visceral implication of being drenched in one’s own exertion.
Gonzalez is younger. A little bit more thrilled to be here. And he’s got the kind of easy, quick thoroughness that means he probably practices with a ball machine at home, but not a lot of real experience.
Patrick makes brutal work of him.
There is a certain way his muscles tense through his forearm and the pulse travels up his bicep when he strikes the ball. His shirt rises as he twists to send it flying over the net. There is so much laboured breath and dripping skin.
He has you sit exactly where you sat during warmups.
Between sets, he extends his arm, taut and sweatsoused, and points to you with the scratched edge of his racket, one eye closed like he’s mapping trajectory. And he does sort of have this bloodhungry precision in his gaze, like a marksman.
You feel it in your neck, the ache of your focus, how your eyes water for lack of blinking as you swivel your head side to side. You do not close your mouth once.
He hits the ball again, and then again. Each with an almost startling accuracy. Each with a deep and fleshsatisfying thwack that makes your very ear canals thrum with the sort of pain that has you expecting the warmth of dripping crimson on your shoulders.
But it’s not just the force that strikes you. It’s that precision. That bulletgleam precision.
He seems to know, with a profound, animalic certainty, exactly where to place each shot.
At times, they will land exactly where the last landed.
And by the time his adversary cottons on, he has set his hungry eyes upon another target.
It’s beautiful.
You start to wonder if you have ever—ever—looked so fucking beautiful doing any single thing in your life. This strange and beautiful violence. Refined and delicate violence. He is violent and graceful.
Patrick groans when he hits the ball. Makes a guttural sound, a pained sort of sound, like he loses something of himself with each forceful departure.
The sun beams down, and you see his beautiful legs flex aglow with the beautiful gleam of his abject labour.
You think, fuck—
New Rochelle is beautiful.
“You know, I could have gone pro.”
Sam leans back in his Herman Miller chair. Takes a deep quaff of his coffee before pointing to Deirdre with his mug.
“You played for two years in middle school,” Deirdre deadpans, her gaze unmoving from her monitor as she populates a spreadsheet with who the fuck knows.
“This is huge, D,” says Sam, unhurt, “This is like if Jamal Mashburn started coaching the fuckin’ nobody that demolished LeBron at the Y.”
Deirdre seems to have forgotten this analogy, which, for her part, Sam first made months ago now.
“But also if Mashburn was married to Lebron,” adds Sam.
Your computer screen casts depressing polygons across your glasses. You slide your AirPods in. You don’t want to know where Bob Dylan will appear on your Spotify Wrapped.
I met one man who was wounded in love. I met another man who was wounded in hatred. And it’s a hard, it’s a hard— It’s a hard, it’s a hard—
It’s a hard rain’s a-gonna fall.
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bbydoll18xx · 1 day
Text
This Is Me Trying
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'I just wanted you to know that this is me trying.'
Azzi Fudd x Reader
Based on this request (sorry it took forever lol)
Masterlist
Word Count: 1.1k
Themes: depression, mild alcohol abuse, hurt/comfort
A/N: hiii so here i am trying out writing for someone other than Paige, and I really hope you like it! If this is a decent success I may write for other people as well :) And of course it was time to write a fic to go along with my most favorite song of all time (folklore stans rise up)
Lets do thisss
also sorry this is lowkey kinda depressing i am a sad girly
~
Your lack of sleep was showing in deep purple bruises under your eyes that no amount of even the heaviest concealer could adequately cover. You haven't slept well in days, and today’s shift had not helped your exhaustion. The day was filled with incessant neediness, people cussing you out, and an endless amount of shit.
Literally and figuratively. 
You walk into your apartment, just wanting nothing but to fall into Azzi’s warm and loving arms, but you’re met with the still darkness of an empty home. Your girlfriend was in Las Vegas playing against the Aces, and she would not be home until tomorrow afternoon. 
She had promised to call you after the game, but you weren’t sure if you would even make it through your shower, much less wait up for her by the phone for another three hours. 
Your eyes fill with tears, the feeling of overwhelming loneliness mixing with your exhaustion, and as you throw your stuff on the floor, dredging your body into your bathroom, letting the downpour of water drown out your own tears. 
You had become quite accustomed to hiding your feelings behind bright smiles and fake laughs, desperate to clutch onto the need to prove to everyone that you were okay.
Even if you really weren't.
Your girlfriend had enough stress on her, and the idea of her needing to worry about you, too, was enough to send guilt shooting through your entire body. 
You had kept up your facade all throughout college, choosing to take long, solo car rides until you had to pull over, the tears swimming in your eyes nearly blinding you. And when you were strung along to the bars with Azzi and the rest of her teammates, you drowned your sorrows and fears with liquor, numbing your thoughts and your body until you were delirious. 
You were the golden girl. 
You knew what jokes to crack for which group of people you were around at the time. Your grades were stellar. And you had bagged the prettiest, sweetest girl in probably the entire universe. 
So, you resented yourself for feeling anything other than being on top of the world, because it was actually quite the opposite.
It got worse once you graduated. 
Azzi was often gone, traveling for away games, and that left you alone to process the unimaginable emotions that came with your budding nursing career. Feelings of loss and incompetence clouded your brain constantly.
Today was no different. 
You had lost a patient, a kind, gentle woman who finally let go, taking her last breath while gripping your hand, completely alone. 
It broke you, and the devastating reality had sunk into your chest, crushing all of the air out of your fragile lungs. And you were now gasping for air, leaving you feeling bereft and vulnerable, like an open wound. 
Maybe that’s all you’d ever really be, and you could not help but think that you were the festering wound in yours and Azzi’s relationship, threatening to slowly tear it apart until the two of you were left standing in the tattered shreds of what used to be. 
You wanted things to be okay so, so badly, but the overwhelming feelings of loneliness and longing had set in, chilling you down to the bone. And you were scared. 
So you would just continue on pretending. 
Azzi comes home the next day, and you put the mask back on the second she walks through the door. You’d be lying, though, if her presence didn’t make you feel the tiniest bit whole again. You melt into her arms, drinking in her presence, as she rubs your back soothingly, her face pressed into the crook of your neck. 
Maybe everything would be okay, if only you could be honest with her.
~
Azzi lays in bed next to you, and you indulge in the way her smell has permeated the soft bedsheets again, after days of the scent slowly becoming less and less potent. She smells warm and comforting, and you nuzzle into her, desperate for her to fix every little part of you that was screaming out in insecurity and despondancy.
A low sigh escapes your throat, secretly wanting your girlfriend to pick up on your mood, and because she knows you better than anyone else, she does. 
“What’s wrong, baby?” She questions, her tone filled with concern and worry. She places a hand on your cheek, coaxing you to look into her eyes, and the glow of the lamp on the bedside table illuminates the kindness emitting from her deep brown irises. 
“I–” You begin, taking a deep breath and then stopping. Trying to put all your emotions into coherent words was quite the task. And honestly, you were terrified of how Azzi would react. 
Her thumb strokes your cheek, as she sits up fully next to you in the bed, eyes still peering into yours. 
“It’s okay, it’s just me,” she murmurs gently, and something clicks inside of you.
It was Azzi. You could tell her anything, and it would never even come close to dimming any of the love she felt for you. 
In that moment, all the anxiety you felt about coming clean seemed silly, like it had been built up in your head to great heights, and here it was now, crashing down all around you.
“I’ve been really depressed,” you mumble, your cheeks feeling warm from her touch and the prickling of shame. “For a long time, actually. And I really fucking miss you. I hate feeling like a needy girlfriend, but I don’t know how much longer I can keep doing this.”
The confession pours out of you, and as the air stills between you, your heart races as you watch Azzi’s face contort into a look of hurt and confusion.
“Oh, baby,” she breathes, scooping you up and setting you into her lap, legs draped over hers as she interlaces your fingers with hers. 
“I’ve been missing you, too. And I didn’t want you to feel like you had to sacrifice your career for mine,” she murmurs, pressing a kiss onto your temple. 
Your shoulders sag in relief, and you connect your lips in a kiss. There were numerous unspoken words shared as your lips entwined in a sheer display of passion.
As you break apart, you gaze back into those dark brown eyes, pupils now blown wide. “Guess this means we’ll have a lot more time to be doing this,” you giggle, wagging your eyebrows at Azzi.
She shakes her head fondly. “Just want my sweet, happy girl back,” she whispers in your ear.
Little did she know, you already were.
~
I really hope everyone enjoyed this. I have been toying around with a lil Pazzi fic, so let me know if you'd be interested :)
xoxo katy
Taglist:
@fullladypanda-blog, @omg-imtumbling, @tenaciousglitternerd, @oldcrdigan, @paigebuxkets, @the-other-half , @patscorner , @dietcokesmom , @tndaqltoifwy
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Text
Mad Season 6 🕸 Story A
Warnings: non/dubcon, social anxiety, chronic illness, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.
My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.
Character: this is Peter's side of the story.
Summary: a class project gets messy. (short!reader)
As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging ❤️
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“Um...” you drone dumbly at Peter. “I don’t know.” 
He stares back at you. He looks scared, “you don’t know?” 
“I’m sorry, I...” the raucous party rumbles on inside the walls. “I can’t think here.” 
“Hey, let me grab my jacket, we can talk outside,” he offers. “Wait, where’s your coat? You can’t go out like that?” 
You look down and realise you left your jacket inside. In fact, he took it. You shrug and he holds up a finger.  
“Please, just give me a chance.” 
You nod. What else can you do? He rushes back through the door and you turn away. You try to ignore the couple sloppily lapping at each other’s mouths. 
You don’t know what to think. You can barely cling to a coherent thought. Bucky’s warning echo in your head. Isn’t this proof? There are other girls, not just you. Yet, you keep asking yourself why you care about them. Peter asked you to be his lab partner, not his girlfriend. 
In fact, no one has ever asked you to be their girlfriend. Why would they? You’re quiet and boring. You shrink back against the wall and peer down at the floor. You should just tell Peter to go back to MJ. 
He appears and your resolve rots away. He only has his coat. “Hey, I’m so sorry, I couldn’t find your coat. I looked all over. The green one right? With the orange buttons? I don’t know what happened but take mine.” 
He holds you his jacket, “Oh, it’s fine. I can’t--” 
“Now what kinda jerk would I be if I let you go cold?” He insists. “I’ll be fine. Really. I like the cold.” 
You blink and take the jacket. You don’t like arguing. You already feel bad enough after barging in on him and MJ. You can’t stop thinking of it. God. It feels so... wrong. 
He walks you down the hall. You’re both silent. You keep distance between you as you get to the elevator and ride it without saying a word. You go out into the lobby and as you get to the front door, you grab the front of his jacket and start to push it off. 
“Please, keep your coat. I should go home--” 
“Just hear me out, okay?” He begs and stops you from taking off the coat. “Please.” 
You face him and dip your chin, “okay.” 
He sighs. You peek up from under your eyelids. He smiles nervously, cheeks pinkening, and he shifts his weight on his feet. He clears his throat. 
“Look, I’m an idiot. I went into that room with MJ. I know how she is. I’m not going to play victim here. All I can say is it won’t happen again.” His jaw ticks, “I’m a dummy. I was... I was so nervous about talking to you. I know you hate parties but I thought if I was drinking I could just tell you how I feel. And of course, it just made me stupid.” 
Your mouth falls open. He can’t be saying what you think he is. Right?
Before you can respond, the door to the lobby opens and you look over as MJ struts out. Her long legs are toned in her heels and her short leather skirt. Her hair is perfect and her makeup brings out her natural colouring. She’s perfect and you’re wearing a pleated skirt. 
You look at Peter again and deflate. 
“Peter,” MJ approaches, “why’d you run off?” 
“MJ,” he sighs, “I told you--” 
“What did you tell me before you had my tongue down your throat?” She smirks. 
“Stop,” he snips. “I said no.” 
“But you didn’t stop me,” she scoffs. “And now what? You’re scurrying around with her? Really? Her?” 
“Don’t be mean,” Peter steps between you and her, as if he’s trying to hide you. 
“You call it mean, I call it honesty,” she chirps back. 
“Get out of here. You weren’t even invited,” he snarls as he reaches back and latches onto your wrist. 
“When did you turn into such a fucking loser?” She snips and shoves him.  
He collides with you but takes most of the impact. She stomps out in her clunky heels as you turn to watch her. She doesn’t look back. 
Slowly, you spin back to Peter, “are you alright?” 
“Yeah, fine,” his shoulders droop. “Look, I get it. I screwed up. I don’t want to ruin the rest of your night. I already dragged you here. Just, take my coat, get home safe. Be done with me.” 
His eyes twinkle wetly and his nose twitches. He looks like he could cry. As small as you are, he seems even smaller in that moment. 
“You didn’t let me answer,” you say. 
His forehead lines in confusion and his lips open wordlessly. 
“I... I’m surprised is all. It’s been a weird night and...” You sway and fold your hands. “I’m kind of a mess myself. I really don’t do well in crowds. I know you know that.” You try to smile. “And I know it’s lame but... I really do try and...” you look away and your cheeks heat up. “I don’t think I would if I didn’t like you too.” 
Another suffocating silence sucks the air out of the room. You fidget and stare at your boots. You wince as Peter steps closer. He surprises you as he pulls the jacket closed and does up the zipper. As the tab reaches the top, he taps your chin and you look up at him shyly. 
“Can I walk you home?” He asks as he brushes his hand down the sleeve and tickles your fingers. 
A full smile breaks through and you nod giddily, “sure.” You grab onto his hand, vibrating in vibrant excitement. Can he feel you shaking? 
“You still cold?” He asks as he tugs you towards the door. You shake your head but as you step outside, he puts his arm over your shoulder and pulls you close. He walks you down the pavement as a blistering wind blows around you. “Gotta keep my girl warm, huh?” 
“Your... girl?” You squeak. 
He hums and squeezes you tight, “all mine.” 
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bekolxeram · 2 days
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The ever so observant @misterapril pointed out in this post that there may be a fake plane crash scenario on Hotshots while a real one (possibly with Athena onboard) is happening, explaining the 2 different planes we see in bts material.
I've mentioned numerous times before, this cockpit mock up belongs to an aircraft from the A320s family.
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The cockpit mockup seems to be from the same type of aircraft as well. It's a narrow body judging by the proportion, and the 2 Boeing narrow body airliners (737 and 757) both have cabin doors working like a regular door, namely rotation outwards to open. While all Airbus doors pop straight out and move to the side without rotating.
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B737 door vs A320 door
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This aircraft on the other hand looks more like a wide body to me, simply because a narrow body airliner doesn't have enough ground clearance to fit a whole firetruck under its wing. It's a Boeing for sure, look at the cockpit windows. I'm leaning towards it being a 767 instead of a 777, simply because a 777 should be a bit larger and I see no winglet on the wing (can be a perspective issue, 777 has raked wingtips that might not show up if you take a photo leveled with the wings).
Well, thanks to @misterapril, I've just noticed something that should be super obvious if I wasn't blinded by the plane.
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This is not the Ontario Airport tower.
So we know Angela filmed something at ONT terminal 2. The hangar with all the firetrucks and ambulances is also there. What you may not know is that said hangar is right next to the ONT control tower, so I always assumed the night scene with the Boeing plane and the 119 truck was also filmed there.
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But guys, they're not the same tower.
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The one behind the firetruck is the San Bernardino Airport tower.
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In fact, I'm pretty sure I know exactly where they filmed this particular scene, taking into consideration other landmarks visible in the same bts photo.
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I think this video posted by Kenny was filmed in the same location.
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I believe they are the same building. You can judge it on your own by watching this clip. It's also the only area within the airfield with highway like markings, leading straight out of a fire station.
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Why is this piece of information important you may ask? Well, we've been speculating the 2 different planes conundrum might be due to budget/production constraint. In S1, the show bought an actual 757 from an airplane boneyard in Arizona and shipped it piece by piece to California. It was such a headache.
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Do you know San Bernardino Airport is also a boneyard? I can imagine Tim says, "don't worry about logistics, we're taking the filming straight to the boneyard this time!" So everything is possible, you have all sorts of retired airliners you can play with for cheap. There's also the possibility that the Boeing we see is just parked nearby, maybe it has nothing to do with filming.
Do you know what else San Bernardino Airport has? A USFS air base. In 7x04 they used the Helinet hangar and its (mostly news) helicopters for the Harbor tour scene, right? San Bernardino is filled with actual firefighting air tankers and helicopters. Perhaps they would be generous enough to let the show take a few shots of a certain helicopter flying around, I don't know, saving people?
EDIT: From the same bts video Kenny posted, I think they're standing under the horizontal stabilizer of a plane? I might be seeing things, and it's not very important, just curious.
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wilcze-kudly · 2 days
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Using the Avatar state scenes as an example and saying this is katara relationship with aang is so vile 🤦‍♂️
https://www.tumblr.com/sunandmoongobrrr/662596151677190144?source=share
Ugh this take again. It honestly always exhausts me to see this because the thing about Aang going into the Avatar state is that it is, at it's core, a defence mechanism. Aang goes into it in life threatening situations, or otherwise, incredibly distressing situations. I've even pointed out its similarities to panic attacks:
Katara is an incredibly empathetic person, and she is able to emphasise with Aang's pain. Because a) she's just that type of person and b) her and Aang share the trauma of genocide and loss.
Katara's interactions with Aang when he is in the Avatar's state aren't based around tempering his anger, but providing comfort and reassurance. It almost seems that Katara just reminding Aang that she is there and that she cares is usually enough to calm him which makes sense. Because, at the core of it, Aang's greatest pain, likely the root of most of his nrgative emotions is that he is the last airbender. His people are dead, have been dead for ages. He is alone, the last of his kind, and it destroys him.
Aang: [To the winged-lemur.] You, me and Appa; we're all that's left of this place. [Looks at the lemur.] We have to stick together.
Enter Katara, who reassures Aang that she is with him, that she cares, that she won't leave him. Because she sees that he is hurting. She hugs him as normal people hug their friend when they are upset, and later, when their relationship is more established, it's just enough for her to make eye contact with him and remind him that she's there.
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Katara : Aang! I know you're upset and I know how hard it is to lose the people you love. I went through the same thing when I lost my mom. Monk Gyatso and the other airbenders may be gone, but you still have a family. Sokka and I! We're your family now!
And I truly don't think Katara does this out of a sense of obligation or fear. She does this because she sees her friend, and later, romantic partner, is hurting. And she knows that pain intimately. So she offers her comfort. Of her own free will, because she cares.
Katara : Do you remember when we were at the air temple and you found Monk Gyatso's skeleton? It must have been so horrible and traumatic for you. I saw you get so upset that you weren't even you anymore. I'm not saying the Avatar State doesn't have incredible and helpful power ... but you have to understand ... for the people who love you, watching you be in that much rage and pain is really scary.
I think the emphasis on "the people who love you" is important here. Katara isn't afraid of the Avatar state itself. She is saddened and scared for Aang, because she knows he is in pain. And he is someone she loves, be that platonically, or romantically.
Side note; I always found it so cool that when Aang went into the Avatar State in the Avatar State episode and wreaked havoc on general Fong's base, Katara, who was literally in the middle of it, remained completely unharmed.
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See, the theme with Avatar is that holding onto anger and pain can be incredibly self destructive. We see this, of course, with Zuko, but also with Aang and Katara.
Of course, we're shown how one's anger affects others, but we also see how painful it can be on oneself. Which is a very poignant theme that isn't often explored.
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This is what Aang was trying to communicate to Katara in The Southern Raiders. And this is what people like this, who commented under OP's post don't get.
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Oh, something crazy? Like for example going against her entire morality and do something she might regret for the rest of her life? That type of crazy? Hell, look at how strongly "The Southern Raiders" ties back to "The Puppetmaster", an episode about a victimised Southern Waterbender driven to near madness by her grief pain, and rage.
Aang isn't stopping Katara from feeling anger, he's trying to make sure she doesn't do something that will weigh on her and compromise her morals and ideals, because he knows how important they are to her.
Aang: The monks used to say that revenge is like a two-headed rat viper. While you watch your enemy go down, you're being poisoned yourself.
Hell, he even supports and believes in her, letting her take Appa and believing she would make the choice right for her. Which she did, in the end.
Aang: I wasn't planning to. This is a journey you need to take. You need to face this man. But when you do, please don't choose revenge. Let your anger out, and then let it go. Forgive him.
And no, I don't think he was trying to save face, since he has never had a problem disagreeing with Katara before, for example in the Avatar State episode, where he followed his sense of duty as the Avatar, despite acknowledging and valuing her criticisms of the matter.
Aang and Katara's relationship is one of mutual support, particularly in helping alleviate each others pain, since they are both genocide survivours, both lost a parental figure to the fire nation, both value their cultures and desperately try to perserve them etc.
I think some excellent aymbolism of this can be in how Aang tries to help Katara with her dismay and discomfort around losing her mother's necklace, something she's expressed was very valuable to her due to her loss. First by making a symbollic replacement, and then risking himself by retrieving the necklace from Zuko.
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I also genuinely enjoy that in both of these instances, Katara put the necklace on herself? Like it would be so easy to just make a cliche meaningful scene where Aang puts it on her and "proposes" but theres almost something more appealing to me of Katara taking the necklace from Aang and putting it on completely on her own.
Katara does not need Aang to calm her down when she's angry, because, with the exception of the Southern Raiders, her anger is usually benign squabbling which is completely normal 14 year old behaviour. Wheras for Aang, his anger usually rears its head on rare occasions when he's in deep distress.
But Aang is there to comfort Katara, to bolster her confidence, to support her, make sure she's having fun almost whenever she needs it.
These are just a few examples of Aang providing comfort to Katara.
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These actions may not be as bombastic and awe worthy as Katara ripping Aang out of a state of deity like power, but they are nonetheless important to Katara and make a big difference.
Aang and Katara's live language with each other is providing comfort, in any way they can. Be it by alleviating anger and pain, making the other feel good about themself, or connecting over the horrific genocides that brutally deprived them of their loved ones. You know, just normal couple things 💗
And this is where I could slander Zutara, but I'll simply tactfully say that Zuko... prioritised things other than Katara's comfort and happiness.
Also, incredibly rich that one of OP's examples of Aang going into the Avatar state out of anger was in the comics. OP neglected, however, to include the scene leading up to this where Aang is extremely calm and nonconfrontational until Zuko grabs Katara and refuses to let go of her despite both Aang and Katara telling him he's hurting her and then attacking Aang after Aang knocks him away from Katara.
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Like hun this is not a good look.
And another point I'd like to raise is this persob in the comments who apparently watched the show blindfolded.
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why are we still here just to suffer etc etc. Like have you folks even watched the show why do you have beef with a twelve year old who commited the crime of loving a girl his age. If you're that fucking upset about it you can just not have him do that in your mind palace you don't have to pick violence.
Aang is a genuinely amazing character who deserves so much more than what his haters say. It's fine if he's not your fave character I just don't understand why people have to be dicks about it.
Genuinely the only good thing I get from examining this type of bullshit rethoric is that it lets me inspect Kataang more closely and find new things I genuinely love about it.
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nina-ya · 3 hours
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A/N: i was a little sappy writing this one ngl idk I just love law so much LMAO Pairing: Law x reader CW: none, mild backstory spoilers if you squint WC: ~800 Other versions: Luffy Zoro Sanji Law (more to come) • masterlist • ko-fi • discord server •
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
Loving Law is not easy. It’s not supposed to be. He’s all sharp edges haphazardly taped and glued together, just waiting to fall apart at a moments notice. Every glance feels calculated, like he’s already three steps ahead in some mental game of chess that only he knows the rules to. But once you become a part of his life, once you’ve proven that you deserve his trust and care, you’re under his protection in ways that you may never fully understand.
Loving Law is falling in love with the ocean at night. It’s unpredictable, dark, but there’s a certain beauty in the unknown that is him. He won’t admit it, but he will always catch you before you fall. Not because he’s trying to be a hero, but because losing anyone else is something he cannot quite handle. His love comes in the forms of subtle checks such as a quiet “don’t overexert yourself,” a lingering glance that asks if you are okay, or a warm coat tossed your wat in the middle of a cold night. He’s practical, pragmatic, but never indifferent. 
Loving Law is accepting that he doesn’t need to be saved, but sometimes he will let you stand beside him as the waves crash over him. He will let you in just enough to feel the weight that is constantly pushing down on him, but never so much that you think he’s burdening you. But you’re there to remind him that being strong doesn’t mean carrying everything on his own. 
Loving Law is loving someone who sees the world through a lens of strategy and survival. His love doesn’t come with flowery speeches or romantic gestures- it comes with an almost obsessive need to keep you alive. He ensures you have what you need and he never asks for thanks. He doesn’t need it. 
But then when you break through those hard walls he had built around his heart from loss after loss, you get to explore a much more vulnerable side to him. You get to learn about the despair that he has been put through, all of the rough battles he has fought to get to this point, everything that makes Law, well, Law. It’s not easy for him to do, and you can see this in the way he chooses each word carefully as if they may betray him. But when this does happen, you realize that there is a strength among the vulnerability, a wordless trust that comes from knowing that you wont use it against him.
And when he opens up, even if its just for a moment, you realize that he is not just giving you his trust, but he is giving you everything. Every piece of himself he thought was lost, every part of him that he thought was too broken to be loved, it’s all there, in the space between his words and the look in his eyes. And you couldn’t be more grateful to be the one he shares it with.
Loving Law is knowing that it may take some time to get through to him, but when you do, its more than perfect. There is a heightened intensity in the simplest of gestures such as the way his fingers graze over yours, the warmth of his hand resting at the small of your back, or the way that he presses his forehead against you staring into your eyes with a look that screams ‘i cherish you’ without having to utter a single word.
When his lips finally meet yours, its as if the whole world screeches to a halt. There is no rush, no frantic urgency, just a slow deliberate tenderness as if he is memorizing every inch of your mouth, the softness of your lips. The way he tilts your chin up, deepening the kiss with an inhale as if he needs to breathe you in. His hands are firm, one cupping your face while the other rests on your waist, keeping you close to him. His hands, calloused from years of battle, move with a surprising softness when he’s with you, as if he’s afraid of breaking something precious. Loving Law is finding safety in vulnerability. It’s the knowledge that while he may keep the world at arms length, he lets you in piece by piece until he allows himself to be fragile in your presence. It’s the softness that only you see in him, the way his hands tremble slightly when they brush over your skin, the way his lips can express so much in the soft presses against yours, the promise that despite all the loss he has endured, he will never let you go.
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