#i dont have money nor the knowledge of where to find good ones nor the bravery to buy one while im living with my parents

[lycan-mutt]

hmmmhmmmmmhmmm

[kunikidanelson]

Alright there was surprisingly a lot of people who wanted to hear my interpretation of kunikidas backstory. So uhm here i go, i just hope i dont disappoint y'all. (Its long as fuck i know, and its not even all LMFAO)

i think he wasnt an orphan because im fucking sick of every single character in bsd being a fucking orphan. What i do think though is that he didn't have the best family life, an overly "protective" (controlling) mother and either an absent or inactive father. (as in, the dad didn't really care what happened at home he just sort of did whatever his wife wanted him to do) but basically this is where Kunikidas hatred for authority starts because all his mother does is pull the "im your mother and you have to listen to me" card. I think his ability before being affected by the "all men are equal" would definitely act up therefore he couldn't go to a proper school because he didn't want to accidentally summon a lion or something like that. So he was basically a nuisance to his mother because she had to homeschool him. Once he was older he decided to go to a math based high school for two reasons: he cant summon numbers; he could live in the school dorms. He basically runs away from home once he's capable and takes on a lot of part time jobs (katai offers him money but kunikida refuses) and basically lives like this until college. Being a good student grade wise he made a deal that if he does tutoring for the other students, they'll let him rent the dorm for free. But at one point he fails an important exam, and though he doesn't get expelled from the college they retract their statement about letting him tutor unless he proves he's knowledgeable in the subject. But that ruins his housing situation and lives on the street for a few days, realising that its less than ideal to sleep on a park bench he goes to katai out of desperation and lives with him for some time while he tries to find a job. And you might see where I'm going with this. But i dont think kunikida would apply to be a detective at first. I believe he would see some poster about the agency needing a secretary, especially someone who could handle computers and decides to try to get a job there. When he goes to the interview he almost starts crying because he's so desperate for money and his own place to live in. Fukuzawa takes pity on him and lets him take hold of the files. Kunikida gets his own apartment (yay) retakes his exam and gets back to tutoring. At one point the agency say they need some sort of signature (or something, i dont have to think of a specific example do i??) on regular paper and kunikida admits that though he knows how to write, his handwriting isn't very good because of his ability he didn't have much of a chance to perfect it. Yosano and Fukuzawa, of course shocked that kunikida has an ability in the first place meanwhile Ranpo just shrugs because he knew all along, just didn't care to mention it. Then fukuzawa asks Kuni if he doesn't want to join the agency as a detective and that any training he might need, will be provided. (Partly offering this to him because the agency in the early days had literally 4 members including the president and secretary Kunikida and they all built a sort of trust between each other) so kunikida accepts and eventually drops out of college because he quite literally doesn't need it anymore, he knows what he wants to do now. And also after all men are equal takes place kunikida starts writing traditionally all the time, simply because he was so deprived of it before, thus building his habit of keeping his notebook with him 24/7.

I hope this made a bit of sense, if you imagined it differently, im not taking that away from you this is just my interpretation xx

Also don't ask me how katai and kunikida met i dont know nor care, i mean they've been friends for around 10 years, so they met when they were 12? They honestly could have just met one day on complete random, I'm not looking too deep into that

[justfangirlstuffs]

Okay, so @feralmoonlight 's recent cowboy au art gave me serious brain worms. But I got enough on my plate, so Imma just toss these ideas out cuz I do not currently have the confidence nor the familiarity of the western genre to write any fanfic around it.

So my idea is that it is set in cowboy AU, you are a doctor or physician whatever they call the profession (if I screw up any vernacular I apologize). You come from a really well to do family and you enjoy being a doctor, you're fresh out of medical school and you love helping people. But your parents are expecting you to take over the family business which you're looking less forward to because you're all about helping people and not really much about the business side of things.

You and your family are on a train heading to meet your chosen fiance which you're not looking forward to cuz you really don't have any say in the matter. But then your train gets hit by the most infamous Outlaw duo in the county Sundrop and Moondrop. They board the train steal some loot from them Rich Folk, but alas the authorities are hot on their Trail so they need a hostage. Sun playfully asks for any volunteers. Of course no one says anything. Until you speak up, volunteering yourself because you're a good person and you don't want to see anyone else getting hurt.

They take you with them and of course there is some coldness towards them on your part because you've heard all kinds of stories about the Dirty Deeds and heinous crimes these two have committed. So imagine you're surprised when they treat you incredibly well despite the fact that you're their hostage. They find out who your folks are and get to thinking that they can hold you for a pretty hefty Ransom so they're going to hang on to you for a little while longer. Much to your chagrin.

They take you to their hidden hideout (they blindfold you so you dont know where it is) and you find that they've built themselves a little community that is primarily filled with children. You learn that most if not all of the children there have been either abused or abandoned and Sun and Moon took it upon themselves to take them in and look after them, stealing money so that they can provide them all the food and clothes and comforts that they need. (I also Imagine they called the community Kids Cove, little nod to the game, and maybe one or two other animatronics are there looking after the kids like Foxy.)

When they bring you there they learn that some of the kids are developing a type of illness and you announce that you are a doctor and ask to have a look at them. You use your medical Knowledge and Skills to not only help out the kids but let the Outlaw Duo know what sort of medicine is needed in order to treat the illness. So you decide to make yourself useful and help out the poor kids while you're being held for ransom. However the longer you're there the more at home you feel and the more you come to take a shine to the pair of Outlaws that do so much for all these kids.

And eventually, when they offer to take you home, you asked to stay. And they are only too happy to accommodate you on that.

(Cowboy AU belongs to @castercassette )

[cutegirlmayra]

When your tired after a 16hr shift yesterday so you rant about Sonic and explain why aggressive writing vs. neutral writing helps with sharing ideas

Me and my online Sonic friend talking about Belle.  (I’m skipping some dialogue throughout the chat, this was lazily put together lol)

WARNING: It’s long, and it’s a rant. So please note that I’m blatantly aware of how wrong my aggressive, sleep-deprived rant was and that I’m stating “DON’T PRESENT YOUR IDEAS LIKE THIS!” because this is not a healthy nor effective way of sharing ideas.

ALSO, ALL THE MENTIONS OF WHAT I BELIEVE MY FRIEND IS FEELING OR THINKING DURING MY RANT ARE ENTIRELY MY OPINON. If she tells me to delete something or change it I will without hesitation but I find it funny, as I look back, to insert what I think might be going on in her mind XD She might have been oblivious to me but I’ll get her thoughts and change anything if necessary.

It’s also how most trolls and antis and even some ‘not experienced writers’ write their ideas out, and it can be easily avoided by using Neutral Writing Methods. So this is a ‘don’t do this, but try this’ post. Enjoy my badly written, sleepy aggressive rant~<3 (Also, my friend gave me permission to share this lol)

Me: She could be for entertaining little kids. But we already have too many OCs, and they're not 'dying off' any time soon so...I smell a mini-series backup plan...and I don't like what that means for Sonic. And it is cute, sorry, my brain is off the hook right now, I'll keep things to myself cause you may not like what I'm predicting and I'm getting sad thinking about it ;-; so, want to be wrong.

(Friend mentioned “Tinker Bell” spin on name.)

That's precious, but can I get a link to the reference sheet plz? Reference sheets can tell a lot about a chara's functionality if you compare it to the 'needs' of the casts. it can help predict their role. I think she's meant to help but also entertain the kids, maybe planted with a secret. Her goal could be to come back to Mr. Tinker but Eggman abuses that and tricks her into a new robot. I got a weird theory about her but I'll just say that she's probably gonna go a bit dark. But be cute and make the audience go, "Aww, poor thing! She's a cinnamon roll" at first, wonder if they'll equip her with 'happy backstory, tragic ending' kinda thing to switch the usual 'tragic backstory happy ending' but I feel this is a tragic character meant to pull emotion out.

(Friend understands my concerns but mentions there hasn’t been a ‘Bad’ Oc for the comic)

No one sets out to create a 'bad character' especially professional writers like these guys. But what makes a character 'bad' is if you ruin or oversaturate their purposes. If she's a main character that over-shines others with too much story then the audience feels 'betrayed' because they want that screen time for the main casts to express themselves and shine through. That's just an example. When working with IPs like Sonic casts, you HAVE to remember the fanbase is expecting things Do you like my OCs? be honest lol Not from my prompts. There's a specific way to handle a OC that helps the main cast shine and reveals their characters more. AU Ocs help Canon Characters in many ways.

(Friend admits they have not seen my OCs in some of my fanfictions, they’ve only really read my prompts.)

Oh, well, some of my fanfictions have OCs, not Lavinya, she's just a mascot. My Sonic OC that retried XD Sorry, I'm misspelling a lot but I hope you don't mind, my spellcheck sucks and I've given up on it lol Oh, so you don't know Harmony, Ol'Wizzy, and Data?Or the Metal Series? Well, there are specific Ocs that my readers like and they express/compliment the canon characters to where even though they're a main character, they don't intervene with the Main Cast's goals. They actually help. Then everything I'm gonna say won't have much merit so I'll just focus on waiting to see if my predictions for Sonic IDW will come true, but I really hope they don't do what it looks like they strategically might be pulling... I hate SEGA marketing- 

(The beginning of my aggressive rant, please note that I’m not thinking about my image and am writing tired and lazy. This is an example of how NOT to express your opinions in negative ways. It doesn’t influence good at all.)

Their ploys are outdated and frankly, do not work for their IPs market. They target the wrong age group, they have no idea how to organize themselves, and they don't have a leading 'elder' so to speak (just a professional among them) to make good calls. So you have young adults (not super professionals, this might be their first real company job) trying to target internet culture and failing their IPs. They're doing outdated Nintendo tactics that only worked for NINTENDO! Also some other companies that have DIED so why are you copying their marketing strats!? stop! lol

Friend: Did you study marketing because this entire convo kinda flew over my head in terms of understanding (This should have indicated to me that my words were coming off too factual and had too many ‘jargons’ going on. I was losing my ‘reader’ through my rant, but my tired brain would not cease!)

Sonic's trying to morph into something he's not and they're following outdated college course books and it's not gonna help... they're leading Sonic further down and the creators in japan have no power cause all the power is in the stock holders who are stupid money-hungry americans who have lost faith in American SEGA leading SEGA of Japan to move on to other things

Friend: mostly just got you don’t like the marketing (Huge red flag! This means my friend is starting to tune my info out, it’s because I’m presenting my ideas in a slightly aggressive writing style. There are trigger words here that lead an reader to start doubting you. This is why, in most of my answer posts, I make sure to write Neutral writing methods, but I’ll mention that more after my rant lol XP)

It's just bad. Lol I have a Frankenstein degree, (Now I’m justifying myself, which was caused by my aggressive approach. If I simply stated this in a more ‘neutral writing method’ then I wouldn’t have to worry about creditability claims because I’m not trying to sell my idea as the high authority on it.) which means I have knowledge on many different fields. I never took a fully -dedicated- 'marketing class' I took a lot of different communication classes that went to my overall major. One was directly about how you present, sell, and look at marketing tactics. So I have my fingers in many different fields, my major was "Creative Writing for Fiction and Film with an Emphasis in Video Production and a Cluster in Theatre Arts." So I can be on camera, off camera, post and pre production, creative table and actual filming. Does that make sense? (I’m not fully awake to realize what I’m writing, but it’s clear at this point I’m starting to wake up and realize I’m ranting and tossing my ideals of how to present ideas out the window, but let’s watch my follies and learn from them, shall we?) I have theories on what SEGA is going to do, and I have my worries because it's all outdated. It worked for older companies but those companies also targeted a varying audience, which SEGA refuses to see themselves as for a 'teenage audience' which is exactly why they boomed in the 90s. Their target audience is now 20s.

Friend: There are Kids who also like Sonic, even if they don’t play the games though. (Due to my aggressive tactics from not thinking clearly about, not just the what, but the HOW I’m writing, it has turned my friend into a ‘contrasting neutrality’ which is amazing by the way that she did this! She noticed my writing was turning aggressively ranting, and being my friend, didn’t want to be rude about what she was noticing. -I’m guessing lol- so instead, she took the commentary approach, which is to state the good as well. This is a terrible position to put your reader into, and you should make sure to always have good examples and good praise mixed in to contrast any opposing or aggressive statements you ever make. -though you should avoid aggressive writing at all times- Sadly, this does put the reader, in this case my friend, in a very vulnerable position. It leaves them open for attack... but thankfully, she’s a wonderful friend and had trust that I wouldn’t hurt her on her counter-follow-up.)

So instead of using their 40 to 50 year old charts, start with looking at early millennial trends and desires. They tried for 'angst' to 'adultify' Sonic but it busted because we are STICKLERS for animation. Because their story was so scrapped together and had no actual character depth, motivation, or even emotional growth to develop for future game lore, they went for the 'easy made game' (Easy baked oven quote lol that’s just mean XD) We loved the trailer, it was well made, but they threw their animators elsewhere and made the programmers (WHO BLANATLY ADMIT THEY DONT KNOW HOW TO DO STORY/GRAPHICS) and made them do things they aren't trained in. Those micro-head movements and mouths took them A LONG TIME to figure out.

(My friend is now agreeing with me several times through my rant. This is a tactic that is used as ‘avoidance’ but also for ‘appeasement’. She’s probably tuned out by now, but respects what I’m saying but is also incredulous at it as well. It’s fair, I’ve cornered her into my sleepy-time rant, and being the lovable woman that she is, she is simply waiting for me to realize my follies lolol I wish she would have told me but I think she knew I was beyond ‘logical reasoning’ at this point and was just letting me get it all out lolol What a good friend TDT)

Animation can't be learned that fast AND expect them to program a game AT THE SAME TIME. Sonic Forces was a 'split up SEGA' trying to get those who survived and said, "Yeah, I'll stay in this job." to do things that THEY AREN'T EVEN TRAINED IN. you put a game programmer on animation and some other stuff they didn't know what to do with and expect it be a top-notch seller.

Friend: (in more attempts to join in and be a ‘participant’ of the conversation I’m clearly dominating -MY ABSOLUTE BAD- she tried to engage normal conversation flow into the discussion again. At this point, she probably did notice I wasn’t my usual self, and just decided to play along and enjoy the ride lolol I’m just guessing this tho, but it’s a good chance to reflect on what ‘wrongs’ I was doing and what ‘rights’ she was doing during this situation ;)b) My big issue with SEGA is that they rush everything. A lot of things would’ve been better if they had the proper time.

That was resolved actually.

Friend: Oh? It was? (Although this looks like an encouragement, it’s actually just another avoidance tactic to help me ‘get the venting out’ but it’s clear she’s not fully onboard anymore. When you write to discuss, you have to leave room for other’s opinions to shine through as well. Healthy conversation doesn’t mean forcing the other person to comply to you. A lot of this is educated guess based on past research, she knows this, and it’s clear she’s got her own research. Please remember to never shoot someone down when they try to engage you in your conversations. But again, this is the ‘don’t do this’ and me upset at my tired self for not waking up fast enough to contemplate how I was coming across in my wordings. Let’s continue to investigate and dissect the train wreck, shall we?)

That was an issue a few years ago but SEGA is taking their time, it's just that they can't organize themselves and hire the right professionals. They have old tactics, they have rookies that aren't 'Fresh Blood with professionalism' like they need. They don't need an old fart who knows his stuff, they need a new guy who is dedicated and passionate about their company who will remain there, learn them in and out, and knows his stuff SPECIFICALLY for the things SEGA needs. You have to grow that. You have to hire a very talented and young spunky and fresh professional, have him work with you for 10-15 years, and start training others. But SEGA is already recognized as a 'established' company.

(Friend is still agreeing with me, but is aware of my way of presenting it isn’t “As nice as I usually present it” so she starts mentioning the symptoms of Japanese Work Culture. A wonderful, insightful point to mention! But let’s see how I butcher this as well...)

It's not Japan though! (Again, shutting her down. Tsk tsk, sleepy me. Wake up, you lazy bum.) They won't let Japan interfere! They're all really rude to japan actually. The guys in charge, anyway. We all respect the officials, but SEGA of America people just want results. They are just funders, they don't actually work the company.

Friend: So you blame them for everything? (She’s trying to help me see that my writing is coming off as ‘hate’ which is because of my aggressive writing follies I’m doing so bluntly. Let’s please all admire my friend’s patience as she lets me rant and kindly waits for me to realize how bad I’m handling my 16 hr shift from yesterday lolol)

Look, business is really unfair, and I get that, but if I have to rant (I’m starting to wake up more, oh goodie.) I'd say they really need to humble themselves and ask Japan to please take ownership again. They kicked out people due to a money crisis but they need a game that will be 'safe to secure money but get enough excited momentum to help us push on and continue.' which isn't Japan's strategy usually. Japan likes risks, they also like money too. They trust America too much (especially in the beginning) because America is a HUGE consumer. For the world in fact. But I think they sacrificed too much for the company (common in Japan) and trusted America too much in making decisions. The officials are too nice to say that America screwed them over because America wanted full control. Well guess what? They have too much control now and their product is sinking..

Friend:  You’ve got a lot of fire about this topic. (After I completely disregarded reading her follows-ups and continued to rant, my unconditionally kind friend finally threw in the towel, realizing I was no where near my usually ‘present’ self and was probably just flopped back in her chair smiling at my idiocy of not understanding her kind and subtly hints.) Go ahead and rant it out. (BOOM! Obvious right!? I should have corrected myself but at this point, I was writing like wild fire with droopy, waking up eyes and didn’t even read it during my long paragraphs...)

Sonic won't ever fade away due to it's fans, but the company is struggling to figure itself out for YEARS now. I just worry what they plan to do next. But I have a theory that they are really putting the next game in Japan's hands, a lot of activity is happening in SEGA of Japan, and they're spending WAY MORE TIME on the next installment of Modern Sonic (or Classic, still unsure which one it is yet.) I really think they need a remake game to give them profit, then use that profit for their next big installment. But so far, I think they are working on a game BUT corona might have effected production so I'm sure they are working but I'm concerned if Corona helped manage 'time and quality' or is helping to ruin it...That I can't investigate yet :( I just wish for the best (I’M FINALLY WAKING UP FULLY AS I STOP AND REALIZE-) Sorry for my rant! My theory talk showed through and I don't usually like doing that so forgive me. I'm tired and that's why T-T

Friend: It’s cool we all need to rant sometimes. (My friend’s going to make it to Heaven TwT she’s so kind.)

(Then I profusely apologized a billion times cause I realize how badly this all went down. lol)

(But the terror hasn’t ended... she mentioned some youtube videos mentioning other opinions as well. -which I’m usually cautious of cause some of them can be fanon.-)

OHhhh did he mention the arcade crash??? the literal WORST event in SEGA history??? That's literally where they sank the titanic, SEGA has never recovered from selling off their stocks. (I’M BACK AT IT AGAIN. -facepalm-) Shareholders are everything now and it's the biggest loss ever. Also, the problem is that kids don't play the games, (Rereading my follies and wanting to answer but still only just waking up...) but SEGA can't figure out why they like the characters and can't seem to take the FREAKIN' TIME to learn their lore. (Overwhelming the conversation again.) My easy steps: Re-establish Sonic lore CANONLY AND CORRECTLY, Re-gather the Japanese Officials original plans and notes, guides and study art, Re-make some popular games with the most details on Animation, Fluidity of motion graphics, and with modern Technology incorporated into the game. Once that is accomplished, they will have enough money to then- Create a continuity. Only with a flowing story and relevant past lore can they start moving forward. Animation will target their audience, Story and character re-established arcs will bring nostalgia and new blood to the field of their games, and then Japan's influences will keep it authentic for the continuities so we don't have fandom mixing with canon NEARLY AS BADLY as before anymore. Ugh, it does matter their sales, but I literally bought a book on the history of SEGA, and read a really compelling history article about more then just the Console Wars... I know SEGA has survived literally the edge of extinction on multiple fronts, but someone needs to take charge of their Sonic branch, and it's... it's just too outdated. kk, sorry for the rant.

Friend: (After being multiple times ignored, even after my brief moment of clarity, is still an angel. Frustrated, maybe, but an angel.) And your steps sound really good. Also mostly just listen to his vids if you ever do. It’s ok we all need to rant. (THE WORLD DOESN’T DESERVE THIS GURL T-T)

I'm tired so my 'angry' is showing and it's not professional XD do you mind if I post my rant? lol Actually, no. (Realize how awfully I delivered my ideas, this is where I begin to see my errors and where the clarity comes into play. -we all have our off days lol- )

Friend: Go for it

I want to but it's too aggressive. I'm too lazy to rewrite it out so I'll just save that for another day XD You got a rare treat

Friend: (This is actually interesting and fascinating to her. But she realized then that I finally did see my error.) Concerned you’ll get aggressive responses back?

Honest opinion is sometimes too blunt and I need to be careful about that

Friend: I mean it’s always good to try and get most of the anger out so you seem more professional (Saint. Literally. A saint. She’s puts up with too much of my crap XD)

That, and also the war of 'But this is Cutegirlmayra? She's so sweet and constantly puts her answers in supportive, positive lights so that if SEGA were to see it, they would feel empowered to try it instead of threatened and throw it off as hate or something unprofessional.' I have an image too. I can't post something super aggressive or I'll lose trust. You're right.

Friend: I’m glad you put a lot of thought into everything you post

I apologize for it tho T-T I didn't mean to dominate with such opinions...lol I worry who I influence, you know?

Friend: Most people don’t and trust me they get into trouble cause of it. And yeah.

I don't want to create trolls or heated arguments. I want to teach people they can safely express an idea without using such awful communication. Exactly, it's professional fanism. lol Positive writing is what companies and their employees actually read. (I’m almost fully awake now lol, realizing my blunder and starting to explain why I was in the wrong. Good on me, pat on the back, admitting I was coming off as aggressive is the first step to changing and getting better lolol Also, I’m including her more, and I’m saying “You’re right.” and she’s going “And yeah.” which is a indicator that the conversation is slowly returning to an enjoyable and healthy one. ;w; happy endings lol)  That's why I skip the aggressive stuff, even if it's passive, I write in a neutral setting so everyone feels safe to read, even someone who works at SEGA.

Friend: (Mentions some nintendo youtuber rant and also news as well, then says-) It was honestly very professional sounding and not rude. (MY HEART, YOU KNEW THAT WAS AN AGGRESSIVE RANT lololol So nice to me TDT)

Lol you had to have seen how slightly aggressive it was tho. (I’M CALLING YOUR BLUFF, BESTIE lol) You literally asked, "You blame America for it?" which is not always true but semi-true. They were way too prideful (Aggressive word) and haughty (Still aggressive terminology) about their success in other Japanese products that they wanted to completely change Sonic to their own wishes, pushing out Japan's creative "licenses" (I use this word loosely, and this gives a slightly aggressive feel but is also more dumbed down so it's more 'passionate' than just aggressive)

Friend: Yeah I saw it was slightly aggressive (Either is starting to realize it or at last admitting it now that I am fully aware of how I was coming across. I also used indicators to show what words were aggressive to help illustrate my point. This is showing I’m much more awake now :)b)

Gotta use those neutral tactics or no one will feel comfortable just reading your idea and instead, will constantly look for a place to intercept with aggression back, whether they agree or not, they're looking for ways to self-insert their aggression if you are also aggressive. I can't write something that doesn't somewhat support and uplift SEGA of America. Why? Because like I said, they literally have survived EVERYTHING and have stuck around. Without them, there wouldn't be an American branch and the money issue would have ended SEGA. Some might say, "But they've done so much harm than good! Why is the money thing such a thing to be praised for?" But it's huge, it's so big, it kinda does offset the wrongs. (Now I’m doing the healthy thing, doubling back and mentioning the good to try and recover. The damage may be done, but she did recommend some videos for me and was polite, so I’m just trying to smooth things over and leave on a ‘wrapped up’ conclusion. But... I should have just left it there in all honesty xD Some things you can’t double-back and correct lol) America is a great business-influenced mindset. None of us would be fans of Sonic without them.

(Friend continues to agree but realizes I may slip into ranting again. She just asks if I can watch the videos.)

America does have it's advantages in some fields and areas, but their biggest most redeeming quality is that they saved SEGA which gave us our biggest love and obsession: Sonic. Now, my usage in that writing was still off neutral, but combined with the slightly aggressive statements, made a GREAT contrast. It's still slightly praising

Friend: And they stopped Japan from giving him a human girlfriend right away.

Me: Exactly.

Friend: I will always thank them for that. (She’s still a sweetheart, working herself into the conversation so it stays healthy. lol Such amazing follow-ups too!)

So although I don't like what's happening, I'm also grateful... to a degree lol We need SEGA of America, which is why I think Japan just ignores them now lolol they know they owe them a lot. 

(Friend mentions videos and as I go to save them to my ‘watch later’ sees that one of them is about Nintendo.)

Yeeeahhh I've noticed that Nintendo is starting to trail into 'cash grab' tactics and that's sickening (MORE AGGRESSIVE WORDING??? HAVE YOU NOT LEARNED YOUR LESSON CHILD?! It takes time to fully wake up lolol) cause before, I literally thought, "Nintendo can do no wrong" their marketing was ON POINT! but the stuff they said about Peach and now... I think new, unprofessional blood (like SEGA) has entered Nintendo and the older guys are either 'training' or 'retired to other ventures'. Nintendo is having it's own 'we used to not be prideful but now we're getting a little too pompous (Another aggressive wording... This can easily trigger people to comment with further aggression either against you or for you, but no aggression is the ideal. Which is continuing to show my lack of remaining conscious lol) about ourselves' and they're starting to act like Disney before their big crash. Disney also had 'limited time offers' with their VHS movies. Now, Nintendo is doing that. They'll make money, but at what cost? When you lose your costumer's trust...

Friend: And yeah the 35th Mario thing immediately reminded me of the Disney vault

Me: Yep. I'm worried for Nintendo. Don't get me wrong! Disney is really good with money grabs, but they... they also act high and mighty (More aggressive statements, wake up, darn it!!!) and their fanbase literally calls them 'an empire' so the fan-trust is gone. That makes you 'lame/outdated' and fans begin to look for 'what's cool?' instead.

(Friend is now re-realizing I’m ‘in and out’ so is trying to use a effective avoidance tactic by asking about different things to help my ranting fully stop.)

Sorry, I'm tired, I get on these rants and I don't mean too. (Trying to shake myself awake again.) I'm sorry.

So we returned to a healthy conversation, but I hope this interesting insight has revealed how to and what not to do about Aggressive Writing. Always stick to Neutral writing if you can, putting in a compelling counter-argument. In this aggressive writing demo, you saw that I tried to cover up my follies by saying counter-praise, but praise writing can be just as bad as aggressive writing. Passive writing can sometimes be annoying (aggressive word choice) too if you come off as disinterested or uncaring, which can still result in negative comments coming at you, or someone overly praising in their writings.

This has been all I’m showing you cause it’s kinda embarrassing ^^; but I hope it helps you in what ‘not to do’ while writing your ideas out :)b

Learn from my sleepy-time mistakes! lol

[badwolfwrites-sometimes]

Drawn Together: Chapter 18

This baby is 1 year old today... I feel old

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18923374/chapters/58649161

"Nonno, please!" Feliciano begged for what felt like a thousandth time that day. Ever since he learned about his grandpa's trip to Germany, he has been dead set on joining him. "Please, you know how much I want to see Germany."

Grandpa Rome resisted. He had no idea how long he would be staying in Germany in the first place, not wanting Feliciano to be away from his brothers for a long time. Plus, he had no idea if his company would even allow Feliciano to come with him. That's just extra money for hotel and food they have to give. "No, Feliciano. Plain visiting Germany isn't a good enough reason for you to come with me."

"But you can say I'm your unpaid intern and it would be a good opportunity for me." Feliciano argued. "Please let me come, Nonno."

"We'll talk later." Was the response Grandpa Rome gave him every time. Usually that later lasted about two minutes.

Feliciano sighed, deciding that this was all he was going to keep getting no matter how much he tried. He walked over to the couch where his brother and Antonio were watching TV. Antonio held back the giggle at Feliciano's dejected face. "No luck?" He asked.

Grabbing the nearest pillow, Feliciano shoved his face into it, murmuring something Antonio didn't quite understand. "Sorry?" Feliciano removed the pillow just enough for Antonio to be able to understand him properly. "I want to see Ludwig." He repeated.

Lovino rolled his eyes. "Maybe that's for the best. Usually when people who met online meet in real life, it's a disaster. He might rob you and-" A pillow flew into Lovino's face. Feliciano's eyes looked unusually on edge lately, even more whenever Lovino badmouthed his friend. This, however, didn't stop Lovino. "If it's war you want, war you'll get." He threw the pillow back at Feliciano before jumping on him.

Antonio had made a quick escape from the battle of pillows and wrestling. A battle to the last feather, to the last standing hair on their heads, to the last inch of skin left without a bruise, to-

"I'm going out!" Someone spoke, interrupting their fight. Both Feliciano and Lovino stopped fighting in order to shoot deadly stares into the one who dared delay their match. It was only Romeo. And Lovino thought it was something important. He was dressed up unusually nice, though.

"Where are you going?" Antonio beat both of the boys to the question on their minds.

"Marie is giving me math instructions." Romeo simply said, making his way to the door, only to be stopped by Grandpa Rome.

"Marie? Who is that?" Grandpa Rome asked, a teasing smile framing his face. "Does little Romeo have a girlfriend? Your very own little Juliet?"

Romeo rolled his eyes, palms growing sweaty. "She's my friend and she's very impatient so I really need to go."

"Tell Marie I said hi!" Feliciano yelled from the couch where he was still trapped by Lovino.

"Will do." Romeo answered back.

"Yes, tell your girlfriend we all said hi." Grandpa Rome laughed as Romeo exited the house, shaking his head at his weird family.

"Who even is this Marie?" Lovino asked.

"His girlfriend obviously." Grandpa Rome answered.

"Young love... That's so nice." Antonio sighed.

"We're in love too, idiot." Lovino remarked.

"Sorry."

"She's not his girlfriend. He has known her about as long as I know Ludwig." Feliciano chimed in, surprising everyone.

"You know her?" Lovino asked.

"Who is Ludwig?" Grandpa Rome asked.

"Feli, are you okay down there?" Antonio, the sensible one, asked.

"Peachy." Feliciano answered as Lovino finally stepped off from him so he could get comfortable on the couch. When everything was finally settled, they all gathered around him, Feliciano asked. "If I tell you what I know about her, will you let me come to Germany with you, Nonno?"

Whines and sighs came clashing together at Feliciano who smirked at his brain being a genius once in a while. He awaited his answer, unwilling to share his knowledge unless he got an approval.

"Feli, that's blackmailing." Antonio chimed in first.

"Really? This again? You horrible-" Lovino started.

"You're really dead set on going to Germany?" Grandpa Rome complained, interrupting Lovino before his swearing fuse could be set on fire.

As this kind of conversation went back and forth, Feliciano kept quiet while laughing on the inside. His family had a thing regarding curiosity for centuries, passing it from generation to generation, they just needed to know everything they were interested in at the moment. "Yes, yes, yes, unless you agree to let me come, I'm not saying anything." Feliciano finally spoke.

All eyes were dead set on Grandpa Rome, watching his every movement. Antonio was practically begging him with his eyes to agree to take Feliciano if it meant he would spill the beans. Lovino, on the other hand, was still as opposed to Feliciano going as he had been before, something he made vocally clear to his grandpa. Feliciano endured the insults, waiting patiently for his answer. All that pressure and curiosity was bad for Grandpa Rome's health. "Fine. I'll talk to the company, but will you please tell us."

Feliciano beamed with joy. Grandpa Rome's company wasn't all that strict when it came to family members tagging along. He knew because he witnessed it himself, a lot of workers had troubles separating from their families. Excitement filled his body, enough for him to ignore Lovino's complaints. He wanted to tell Ludwig about this so badly, but first, he had to complete his promise.

"Now will you tell us?" Antonio asked, growing impatient.

"I will, I will. Wait." Feliciano said, pointing at Lovino who was still ranting furiously. Antonio silenced him with a pat on the shoulder, taking his hand to hold until Lovino was completely calm.

Feliciano could now begin. "Her name is Anne Marie. He met her at the library one day after lessons. She studies math and is really smart. She's not Italian, but she came to study here because she didn't really fit in with the French girls. She's from Monaco, I think, and she's older than Romeo. I think he said she was around my age and she's also really pretty. I might have a picture..." Feliciano paused, quickly searching through his phone for a short while before giving up. Not a word was spoken during the entire time. "I can't find it now, but Romeo might show it to you when he comes back. They hang around a lot because she explains math to him and he teaches her chemistry. That's all I know."

Pause. Everyone took a bit of time to process everything Feliciano said. "So, she's not his girlfriend, but they hang out a lot? Sounds to me like they are im denial." Grandpa Rome spoke first, but before Feliciano could repeat once again that his brother wasn't dating his friend, he was shut down by Lovino and Antonio.

"Obviously. Unless Midget is gay as well." Lovino said.

"That's a rude nickname, Lovi. I think it's sweet that he has a friend who helps him out, but if they were dating she could help him out even more." Antonio chimed in.

"Like I said-" Feliciano tried once again, but in vain.

"Our little Romeo is growing up. Soon, he'll be married with kids and maybe that would get his head out of that science thing he has." Grandpa Rome looked ready to cry.

Feliciano noticed that any more attempts to clear the misunderstanding up would fail, so he texted Romeo what happened.

♡~Feli~♡: Sorry i told them about marie ♡~Feli~♡: On the plus side ill maybe go to germany!!!!! ♡~Feli~♡: Ill bring you presents as an apology and tell her i said hi

Romeo's reply came in rather quickly, letting Feliciano know that Romeo was still on his way to meet her.

☆MeoMeo☆: Dont worry bout it ☆MeoMeo☆: But do bring me presents

Feliciano laughed, the conversation about Romeo's life still ongoing. A perfect opportunity for Feliciano to slip back quietly to his-

"Oh yeah Feli, you mentioned some guy Louis, I think. Who is he?" Grandpa Rome remembered, catching Feliciano in his attempt to sneak out of the living room.

"Ludwig, actually. He's..." Feliciano trailed off, he hoped this question wouldn't pop out before they were on their way to Germany. Or at least, before he told Ludwig there was a chance he would come visit him. "My friend."

"Oh? Alright then. How did you meet?" Grandpa Rome asked.

"Internet." Before Feliciano could answer, Lovino interrupted him. Feliciano just gave him the stare, nobody in this family was going to let him speak normally today.

"Feli, we talked about strangers on the internet. You can't trust him." Grandpa Rome stared at him concerned, so much that Feliciano wanted to scream and tell them all about how kind Ludwig actually is. He kept quiet, fighting was always useless.

"He's not a stranger, Nonno. He's my friend's relative and a good person." He simply said, hoping his grandpa would understand and not press the issue anymore.

"Feli, I'm not having this conversation. I want you to stop talking to whoever that Louis guy is."

"Ludwig."

"Doesn't matter." Grandpa Rome raised his voice, something so rare Feliciano felt his knees weaken. "He could be a murderer and I don't want to have to bury you so young. Stop talking to him immediately."

For a moment there was heavy silence. Neither Feliciano nor Grandpa Rome spoke, leaving Antonio and Lovino just standing there awkwardly. Lovino almost regretted not keeping his mouth shut, seeing as Feliciano looked about ready to cry. 'It's for his own good,' was what he told himself.

Sucking back the tears, Feliciano nodded. "I'll be drawing in my room, call me when dinner is ready." And he retreated to the one safe place for him in the house, limping his way to it until his bed was before him. Grabbing Silence in Venice, he collapsed face down on the bed, seeing wet stars.

The buzz of Feliciano's phone woke him up. He had no memory of falling asleep, at least not while holding his favorite book, but as he saw the texter's name, everything came to him. Unlocking his phone, he was greeted with over 50 messages all from Ludwig.

Ludwig: So about that challenge Ludwig: I don't really know how to draw dogs well but they were acting cute today and so I hope you don't mind that instead of a drawing you got a picture

*Ludwig has sent 20 pictures*

Ludwig: I guess that is a bit too much

Feliciano kept scrolling and reading Ludwig's messages. Most of them were long ones detailing the entire day of his pets' life, but then they begun getting weird.

Ludwig: So i think about pigeons a lot Ludwig: They are really cool you knkw Ludwig: And like what if i was a pigeon you know what id do Ludwig: Id take my body trash out on every persons head Ludwig: Doesnt that sound super cool

These were the most recent ones and Feliciano suspected Ludwig probably got really drunk when he texted him those, although that didn't make much sense because it was barely 6 p.m. Nevertheless, as weird for Ludwig as they were, they made Feliciano smile.

♡~Feli~♡: Are you okay Ludwig

Ludwig: Ludwig Ludwig: Im not ludwig Ludwig: Im the great pigeon man the awesomest of all

Well, that was strange. Ludwig wasn't the type to use the word 'awesomest.' If anything, he usually complained about that word because his brother-

Feliciano realized what was going on here.

♡~Feli~♡: Gil is that you

Ludwig: You bet i am im gil the pigeon

♡~Feli~♡: Okay gil pigeon would you be a nice pigeon and give your brother pigeon his phone back

Ludwig: But we re having such a nice pigeon conversation  Ludwig: He would ruin our pigeon time

♡~Feli~♡: I would rather text you from your own pigeon phone thats why

Ludwig: Oh why didnt pigeon you pigeon say so

♡~Feli~♡: Thats a lot of pigeons

Ludwig: Sure is Ludwig: I cant find my pigeon brother he probably got pigeon lost pigeon watching Ludwig: I want him to find a noce pigeon to take caer of him while i go on pigeon adventures

♡~Feli~♡: Thats really sweet of you pigeon gil

Ludwig: It sure is Ludwig: I found him hes pigeon asleep

♡~Feli~♡: Oh alright ♡~Feli~♡: Thank you pigeon gil

Ludwig: I woke him up and hes pigeon mad at me Ludwig: Goodbye my pigeon friend Ludwig: Sorry about that I swear I just took a nap and he is already so drunk

♡~Feli~♡: Dont be that was hilarious ♡~Feli~♡: Gil likes pigeons a lot

Ludwig: Yeah Ludwig: He watched a British culinary show where someone made pies out of pigeon meat and he has been angry about it ever since

♡~Feli~♡: Oh poor gil ♡~Feli~♡: Was it a good nap at least

Ludwig: It was short that is for sure Ludwig: I have been playing in the garden with the dogs all day so I am a little worn out Ludwig: How are you Ludwig: Will you be watching Eurovision tonight

♡~Feli~♡: Oh absolutely ♡~Feli~♡: I really like this years songs i think denmark might win ♡~Feli~♡: I dont want to get my hopes up by claiming we will win because we never do

Ludwig: I like Italy's entry this year Ludwig: Ours as well but it isn't victory material

♡~Feli~♡: I like germanys song a lot ♡~Feli~♡: I can relate to it but thats a whole other story ♡~Feli~♡: Anyway im both good and bad ♡~Feli~♡: Good because i might be coming to germany soon  ♡~Feli~♡: And bad because nonno

Ludwig: Wait you will be coming here? Ludwig: For real? Ludwig: I am not really done with the book yet

♡~Feli~♡: No ill be coming with nonno because he has this trip with his company and things like that all over europe

Ludwig: Then is the bad news that he doesnt want to take you or?

♡~Feli~♡: No ♡~Feli~♡: I wouldnt be feeling this sad if he didnt want to take me its just that ♡~Feli~♡: He wants me to stop talking to you and being your friend

Ludwig: Why?

♡~Feli~♡: Lovi spilled that we met online and my nonno is really strict about online friendships and everything ♡~Feli~♡: So he ordered me to stop talking to you

Ludwig: I see Ludwig: Well i did employ you in a way so maybe you could tell him that if you are going to come to Germany Ludwig: It is less suspicious that way

♡~Feli~♡: I dont kno ♡~Feli~♡: My nonno can be really mean sometimes but lovi is even meaner ♡~Feli~♡: I want to fight back but if i did he ll tell nonno and make everything be my fault ♡~Feli~♡: Its stupid and i hate it i hate it here

Ludwig: Brothers are usually like that Ludwig: Maybe it is good that you aren't starting fights because in that way Lovino can't project the blame unto you Ludwig: But at the same time that pushes him to abuse you more just to get a reaction out of you

♡~Feli~♡: I wish i could live with you ♡~Feli~♡: I wouldnt be lonely at least

Ludwig: If you still have problems with your grandfather you can tell him that you can stay here Ludwig: I suppose if he is traveling with a company that means the company pays the bills to hotels and transport Ludwig: So if you and him want to stay you can come to our place and save some money

♡~Feli~♡: You know what thats a brilliant idea ♡~Feli~♡: Ill tell him that ♡~Feli~♡: But lovi would probably object to something there

Ludwig: My best advice is to ignore what he says and if he says something mean about you just nod but don't take him seriously

♡~Feli~♡: I can try that

Ludwig: Talk to your grandfather first please

♡~Feli~♡: Are you excited at the posibility of me coming over

Ludwig: Ecstatic Ludwig: Gilbert would be overjoyed as well Ludwig: And also because I want to know will your grandfather approve of me  Ludwig: Because I really don't want to lose one of my only friends

♡~Feli~♡: We re both so lonely amd sad we need each other ♡~Feli~♡: Ill text you his response

Feliciano locked his phone and put it for charging, racing down the stairs to find his grandpa on the phone. Grandpa Rome mouthed to Feliciano that they were talking about the trip to Germany and shook his head that the company was refusing.

Feliciano motioned to him to cover the phone because he had to tell him something. Grandpa Rome excused himself for a moment to the person he was talking to. "My friend said we could stay at his place so we don't have to pay extra for hotels and food." Feliciano blurted out.

Grandpa Rome nodded, passing the message to the person on the phone. They waited for a response. Finally, Grandpa Rome nodded and Feliciano was gone in a second.

♡~Feli~♡: IM COMING TO GERMANY!!!

[yournewfavoritethings]

Y’all we gotta do something about the education system

I’m not just talking about the American school system, I’m talking about every one. I saw this post and it just tRigGEreD me to the core:

YALL WE GOTTA STEP IT THE F*** UP. CLAP YOUR HANDS IF YOU LIKE SCHOOL. HEAR THAT? NO YA DONT. literally everyone hates school and why?

We aren’t passionate abt what we’re learning

Information is forced upon us in an unhealthy process

The work is unreasonable and most likely things we won’t ever use again

Lastly, it teaches us to fit into little cut out spaces and fill roles that society expects from us.

Let’s dive deeper, shall we

Passion:

We’ve all heard this before, and yet none of us have taken a stand in any way that makes a difference. Listen, I know we all need basic math skills, and probably should read that Shakespeare book, and I agree. However, it doesn’t make sense that every year it’s MATH, HISTORY, SCIENCE, ENGLISH, and a sport or something. Like, how much do you think I’m gonna remember guys?

And none of us are into it. Personally, I love English. I could read and write and depict novels all day. On the other hand, I hate science with a passion. It does not make sense. Many students are like this, better at other subjects and maybe not as good at something else. Why is that so bad? I find myself dozing off in class bc it’s so boring. The way we’re learning isn’t learning at all. It’s being damn good at memorizing and cramming things last minute. THAT ISNT LEARNING which leads me into my next point

How we learn

First off, I’ve had 5 good teachers in my life. 5. I’m a sophomore in high school. The only reason I know weird things about how geometry works is bc of my 6th grade math teacher. The only reason I get human geography is bc of my AP human teacher. You wonder why I don’t understand biology? WE TAKE NOTES FROM OUR TEACHERS PAGES AND LISTEN TO HER READ OFF THE SCREEN. You wonder why my homework is excellent and my tests are failures? BECAUSE THEY ARENT TEACHING AT ALL, THEYRE EXPECTING US TO KNOW BC WE STUDY, AND THEREFORE ARENT DOING THEIR JOBS.

Secondly, students don’t learn the same. There’s this art piece of a monkey, a fish, and an insect or something and they’re all asked to climb a tree. This is the education system. Sometimes, people can learn easily bc they get it. For others, it’s impossible bc it’s not who they are.

And it’s unhealthy

get up at 6. Get off at 4. Have 3 hours of homework. Go to sleep at 9. Repeat. Do you know how unhealthy that is for teenagers? I play a sport and I have to go to practice at least two school nights a week. And on the weekend, teachers pile on everythingggggg. You wonder why we procrastinate? Cause we are unmotivated, tired, and physically unable. I take all AP classes bc it’s fun to learn, if you think about it. I’d love to know about the ecosystem and the planets. I think science is fun! I soak up facts about our ancestors and how our world came to be. I think history is fun! But the busy work, the stress, the never ending due-dates, finals, and homework make it unbareable.

Y’all have heard this before: we won’t use the work in the future.

No we won’t. The only thing I’d need it for is helping my kids with their homework, because the education system doesn’t change despite how awful it is. Honestly, it just keeps getting worse. Ted talks and posts about this are endless, so I won’t go into detail, you get the just.

Societal Roles

School is meant to enhance our creativity and our uniqueness, but it does the exact opposite. It discourages our individuality by making us take tests and work for meaningless grades. Think of the billionaires who didn’t go to college. Think of the successful people who are mathematicians or scientists. Everyone that comes to mind when I think of someone successful, probably didn’t use any of their prior high school knowledge to achieve their dreams. I’m tired of being anxious all the time. Even as the school year nears I feel myself becoming depressed, scared, and stressed already. What a shame.

Solution:

My first solution is that we have Fridays as half days, and start school at at least 9, but 10 would be better. The school day should still end at 4.

Why?

This will decrease stress dramatically and allow students proper time to rest. Having that delay will allow students to have healthier sleeping schedules and more time to do homework. While this does decrease time for actual learning, I believe schools can make it work. Having A/B schedules where students have half their classes on A day and the other half on B day should suffice nicely. As for Friday’s, the school should get out at 12 and be kept open until 3 for students to come in for tutoring. Teachers will then have to work until 4 bc we need our grades in and this allows them up to 4 hours to sort everything out.

Next solution, from Kinder through 8th grade, the four main subjects should be enforced as they are just basic means of education (but kept the same as they already are). High school should allow students to have 3 years of each, so that they can pick which classes they want to take that year.

This allows more room for endorsements and sports throughout your high school years. Personally, high school is already a drag for me and if they’re gonna continue the work load, then they’ve gotta cut the time we have to endure it. Everyone I know is so anxious all the time, they’ve turned to drugs and alcohol and juuls. Honestly, I think it’s bc it gives them an escape, but I wouldn’t know. On top of that, everyone’s depressed. I can blame about 70% of this on education alone. Imagine having the freedom to grow into a person you want to be. With this schedule, I really think we can. We have more time to figure out who we are and what our passion is through picking classes that suit us instead of the main 4. Plus, teachers will benefit as well. They get to teach those who want to learn their subject and will strive for it.

Last solution, work load needs to be fixed.

I’m not just talking homework, I’m talking busy work, projects, and tests. I’d rather learn than do that crap, bc, what a shocker! It doesn’t help. Tests should be once every two months, with quizzes enforced every two weeks. Quizzes should be no longer than 20 questions, and tests no longer than 40. Half the amount of homework we already receive should become optional, and a study resource more than a grade. I get about 5 pages a week in math alone, not to mention the amount I get from other classes. Let’s cut that to about 15 questions and have 3 pages of optional study work that help you understand the subject.

And for busy work, let’s make that a thing once every week, and for a short amount of time. The rest should be practicing with the teacher or optional station work.

Projects, on the other hand, should be given once every month. They shouldn’t be huge projects, but just simple ones to cover the unit. Nor should they be useless. I’m not gonna go design a topographic map at home and waste my money on poster paper or connect a baseball game to a mathematical equation. Give me a few key materials to research and a few options on how I want to complete it such as, google site, video, presentation, or creative side like drawing. Whatever benefits the student.

See how I’ve included every students needs and ways of processing the material, along with setting realistic expectations to uphold them to? Not that hard.

Please feel free to add more! I’d love to hear y’alls opinion on school and what you think of my solution! I’ll probably make a legit paper on this bc I kinda just threw this post together lol

[sagittariusboyfriend]

im gonna do a "how i see the signs" as well!!

traditionally masculine aries: a force of creativity. oftentimes politically correct. very friendly and easy to talk to, but will shift in temper and energy depending on whether or not he is in focus. musically inclined.

traditionally feminine aries: also a force of creativity. a kind of jittery energy that cant really be contained. might go up and down in volume a lot depending on social context but is always bursting to have a conversation. very awake and with fire in her eyes. openminded and wouldnt hurt a fly. artistically inclined.

trad. masc taurus: ugh horrible. forcefully straight forward, blunt in an unsensitive way, not that good at picking up on social cues because he is convinced of his reality. might be pompous and pretentious, even bitter. the flip side of venusian traits - pretty uncharming. snarky. way better at group/professional relationships than personal relationships. assertive in the workplace and is doing his job better than anyone else could.

trad. fem taurus: intelligent and an intellectual. sensual, assertive, has such a presence that people are in awe most of the time. might be pretentious but its actually genuine and doesnt come off as a negative trait. powerful.

trad. masc gemini: ahh gemini. witty, quick, reactive. genuine, but in short bursts. his intuition is based upon HOW he feels at any given moment, however he has no clue WHAT he feels. scared of emotions. might have a tendency to gaslight. obviously prone to communication and loves learning from history, but has a hard time seeing the bigger picture over the details. small things make or break him... for a week or so. then its forgotten, until something stirs it up 6 months later, and his emotions are all over the place; its like they get tossed up in the air and love might stick to the ceiling and pride to the wall and fear to that person over there and he has no idea where to start to assemble. charmingly childish, prone to grumpyness. social artisan regardless of controversial values or not. needs constant intellectual stimuli.

trad. fem gemini: does not need romantic relationships to feel like a complete person! prefers friendships over love relationships, and can usually pick and choose between lovers if on a romantic whim. not always even interested in shacking up with anyone, makes a happy independent single household. that "fun" friend. self-confident, quick, witty, might have a sharp tongue. absolutely excels in social situations and knows everyone in one way or another, and everyone knows of her in one way or another. prone to ghosting people for weeks because she simply forgets to respond. loses focus easily. probably works in sales. might come across as not so complex to other people.

trad. masc cancer: sweet, charming in a wholesome way. in tune with himself. intuitive and embraces and encourages talking about feelings. oftentimes very politically correct. might live somewhat of a fake life in the sense that he IS a family man, but cant help himself from wanting dirty, promiscuous sex for many hours with many random people. giving and generous - in every sense. probably does a lot of philantrophy or volonteers.

trad. fem cancer: reserved. exudes feminine energy, almost to a point that she is not comfortable with herself. very very sweet, just wants everyone to be okay. will disappear and reappear in social circles and no one will know where she has been, but theres an air of mystery to it and no one dares to ask. might be some kind of red preistess lol.

trad. masc leo: loyal, as long as he doesnt feel in the slightest that he has been made a fool of. very strong integrity, but an integrity that is based on image. easily approached, the nicest person in the room and will include and respect everyone. generous and genuinely loves anyone who does not come off as harmful, and will give you his last money if he feels you need it more. works hard to feel safe. creative in what he thinks is a funky way, but its actually pretty mainstream.

trad. fem leo: also honest, hard-working and loyal. integrity is also important. creative in traditionally artistic ways, like photography or drawing. has a natural authority but is the sweetest person and will NOT abuse it. very passionate about peoples equal value, doesnt really have a flare for drama at all, just wants to be stimulated. when she loves she loves with every fiber of her being and being affirmed by her partner is imperative to self-worth.

trad. masc virgo: retains information like a motherfucker! man, what a chattery bloke. an earth sign ruled by mercury makes the most, i think, well-rounded PR personality. gemini can frick off when it comes to arguments because trad. masc virgo WILL shut you down. he serves facts and will probably be a tad manipulative about it, but will also admit to it. doesnt really wait to run you over or quip back, and then just stares at you blankly as if he is waiting for a response. witty and warm like a sun to his closest, will make jabs and is cold like granite to people he doesnt like. might however have some ego issues.

trad. fem virgo: pretty much exactly like trad. masc virgo, only retains a certain jovial energy and a strong sense of nurturing and dicipline. very funny! authoritarian.

trad. masc libra: might come across as very calm and even meek at times. everyone likes him, no one dislikes him, but he isnt a big personality. nice and sweet and always positive. comfortable in the background as the glue that keeps groups together. not very verbally communicative, but ingenious when he channels his communication through music or art. wants to be appreciated and very much is. pretty private, but everyones friend.

trad. fem libra: full of the good venusian traits. loves love, loves good food, loves yoga, loves pampering herself and others. the best hostess you have ever met. has a hard time deciding on things and will make herself suffer through qualms and trials for days for something that, for anyone else, could have been decided within a couple of minutes. somewhat of a perfectionist. spiritual. gets along with everyone. very into female impowerment.

trad. masc scorpio: kind of rude, but smart. he doesnt know where it comes from, but his subconscious intuition oftentimes leads him to hidden truths, whether they are pleasant or not. might be the jealous type. can just trust his gut and will know exactly what is going on behind closed doors. intelligent in a very abstract way. might come across as always ready to strike just in case someone thinks they are better than him in any way.

trad. fem scorpio: does not show emotion easily. is very intelligent and knows how to lead a conversation where she wants it. inquisitive, literally opens her entire mind for you when you sit down one-on-one. not for anyone to enter, but for her to use ON you, and will analyze your behaviors to the core and dig around in there. make you see things from perspectives youve never even thought about. this could be used for bad, but usually its used for your own good because insight and truth, darkness into light is what she is after. intense. low key passionate. a great person to brainstorm with. excudes sultryness, but almost like a perfume, an illusion, mostly because people become so mesmerized with her psychological skill that they immediately figure she is coming on to them. powerful socially. doesnt want nor need drama, the quest for truth just gets ruthless sometimes. loyal if you dont mess with her integrity. unlike leo, her integrity is based on conscious and subconscious intuition. not into practical things in general. does not care for high morals.

trad. masc sagittarius: good at everything on the first try but gets bored easily, even depressed when forced into routine. diplomacy is important, so is personal freedom. a charismatic positive personality that shines bright and has an almost gravitational pull because of it. wants to be valued for his brain and generosity of free, non-traditional love and insight. learning is everything. the bigger picture is everything; abstract concepts that you can translate and cross-reference to different doctrines and schools and philosophies. on an eternal quest for knowledge in all situations, be it emotional or practical. "why do things work like this?" he asks and is genuinely excited to hear your and everyone elses reasoning. his goal in life is to get to know himself through others and to find firey partners to come along for the ride and share the fun. loathes drama, wants everyone to be accepting. optimistic. might be the guy many fall in love with but who is completely oblivious to it because he has his mind set on other things.

trad. fem sagittarius: very much like trad. masc sagittarius. also fierce, takes no shit, the life of the party, everyones instant friend and a BIG personality. equality is very important!

trad. masc capricorn: attractive, cold, sexual. on the grind, because everything works against him either way so he might as well work hard and overcome. dry humor and a smug smile, vicious eyes. but tender and fragile once you get to know him. so used to being the underdog in his own head that he hasnt realized everyone sees him as the leader. doesnt realize people follow him. doesnt care. is just and stern. is not afraid of delivering harsh truths, can shut you down with a look.

trad. fem capricorn: leads with silence. not because of shyness at all, its just a demeanor that comes naturally. although may have been shy when young, simply because of society. exudes power, unknowingly or knowlingly. intimidating and stylish as fuck. eloquent. uniformity is a keyword for everything. has learnt the hard way. hilarious dark humor. prefers respect to spectacle. is a force to be reckoned with and gains pretty much everyones respect.

trad. masc aquarius: might have a hard time deciding about personal freedom, what is and what isnt. contemplative, insightful, the least traditional of traditional men. high EQ, might prefer polyamorous relationships, almost lacks jealousy. tall and slender. very much capable of seeing through all points of view and will speak rationally. rarely gets heated in discussion because he just doesnt see the point in being reactive.

trad. fem aquarius: a higher being. high octave intuition; the person with the highest EQ youve ever met in your life. new insights with every breath. does NOT care for tradition, usually only indulges in the bare minimum of tradition to move about unnoticed in society as the penultimate alien being they are. she has an entirely different kind of mind that seems so complex and effortless at the same time, and her knowledge and ingenuity could change the world - if it was only ready for it. finds solutions to everything. altruistic. optimistic. so wise and so rebelliously young at the same time. manages to care for everyone and everything all the time. truly wondrous.

trad. masc pisces: an academic. a sensitive guy. highly philosophical, in its scholastic form. makes a good teacher of abstract concepts. always searching within himself first before speaking. interested in history and the human mind. constantly battles with feelings of not being good enough but always comes out as more and better than expected. probably very introvert.

trad. fem pisces: witchy. dreamy. some kind of seer. needs quite some time to process emotional impacts. has a tendency to mimick peoples traits and quirks without knowing it. very emotional, highly sensitive. very impressionable. open to and thirsty for new ways to make sense of all these emotional impacts, but might change ideologies and/or trim her sails to the current wind. conflicting subconscious emotional forces at play all the time which leads to a lot of self-doubt. not necessarily introvert, but introspective.

[system-of-a-feather]

Hi, so actually I want to make my driving licence but I am so freaking scared that I am not going to manage it.I have problems with focusing and I am fast overwhelmed, so what if I dont understand something and begin to cry or even Lose more of my focus? I don't know if it's good for me to drive,even I want it so bad.Also I barely have money, so I cant try and fail. If I begin, I have to success. My dad doesn't believe in me so Idk if it's just that what scares me..What do you think? Do or dont?

Ooof. I just woke up but like, I have been in a very very very similar situation as someone who has DID, is quick to get overwhelmed, easily looses focus, and chronically dissociates even outside of DID so I felt like responding pretty quickly. Honestly, from personal experience, this can be a tricky topic and a decision that I don’t know enough of the situation / your personal condition to say one way or the other, but I can generally explain how this issue has gone over for me / our system and if you want to pull from that, great. With that being said, this is 100% our experience with the issue and isn’t necessarily going to play out the same as yours. Just because it played out how it did for us, doesn’t mean it will be the same, so keep that in mind.

I personally got started with my drivers license before noticing this to be an issue so I didn’t necessarily struggle with the topic of if I should or shouldn’t go for it, but shortly after starting to learn, I found that I have a very strong freeze reflex (which isn’t good while driving since it keeps me from making a decision) and while driving it is easy for me to get overwhelmed and dissociate and not take in enough information to drive safely and comfortably. Of course, the knowledge of this makes me more anxious, more overwhelmed, and dissociate more ironically so it is a horrible feedback loop

This actually became a really bad thing for my mental health since I am a really independent person that functions on the idea that I can do almost anything myself if I study it, plan, and dedicate myself properly and that idea is one of the reasons I’ve recovered as much as I have - however I really really struggled to fix this loop.

Personally, I managed to figure out learning how to drive and all with some work, but I did honestly fail a few times. Currently, I do have a Drivers License but I honestly don’t drive because I don’t have a car (but if I really insisted I could, so it is also the second reason that is why I don’t have a car + lack of a current need for one) and personally don’t feel safe enough - at least as Riku - to drive regularly. 

With that being said, this might only apply if you have a system, but something that has worked for us a bit is finding what alters might have less of a problem driving and pretty much working really darn hard to set up a ‘ritual’ and environment to try to get them out as much as possible to drive when it is needed - both learning and otherwise. It took me some time, but I decided that it was okay that I really badly struggle with driving and it is something I will work on, but for the time being, I am going to rely on my fiance and Aderis for driving when I need to.

Typically for us, when I need to drive, I try to dress for Aderis, bring her soda, play her playlist, and essentially try to surround ourselves with a large number of her positive triggers since she has very little issues driving and actually likes it.

Currently, as mentioned above, we have a license but no car and don’t drive, which is partially because we don’t need it right now, and partially because I avoid driving - but it is something we are currently working on. Currently I have been working on integrating skills from other alters (drawing is the current one and we succeeded woot) and driving will probably be one of them eventually and at some point, I will have to work on breaking the anxiety-dissociation loop - but while it isn’t necessary nor having a car to drive we aren’t.

Back to your particular topic - some personal take-aways I have from the situation breakdown to the following.

1) Do you think you could figure out a way around your tendency to loose focus / get overwhelmed?

Can this issue be handled with therapy, CBT, or some form of internal management that you can work with? How easily do you think you might be able to recover / overcome this hurdle? If you aren’t sure and have a therapist, I STRONGLY recommend talking this issue over with your therapists.

2) Do you want to drive or do you need to drive? Does where you live have an alternative to independent driving based travel (subways, heavy biking presence, trains, good reliable bus routes)? 

If it is a want, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t as much as you should weigh how much you want to drive against how much stress / difficulty / of a challenge it would be currently to do it and weighing it against if you think you can get around it. 

Also, even if you technically don’t “need” to drive, if you don’t feel safe not knowing how to drive, I would generally count that as an almost need. Even if it isn’t necessarily needed physically if driving is important to you mentally feeling safe, then it is almost just as needed.

Sometimes, as sad as it might be, driving is a bit critical to gaining money, getting place, getting to school or interacting with people. This is personally why we didn’t give up on driving since we know future we would absolutely need it and with where we live, it wouldn’t work not to.

3) Is it possible to put learning off for a better time financially / mentally?

You do not necessarily have to do this right now. Down the line you might have recovered better and gained more skills to manage the issues that impede driving (I avoided learning for a year or two until I realized Aderis was comfortable with it and learned how to work, communicate, and get her out when I needed) or have more security with money that might allow you to be more comfortable taking the risk.

If it is possible to say “No right now, but it will be a goal in the future” that is 100% a good and valid thing to say since not everything has to be done immediately. 

4) If you decide you can’t drive / learn to drive, that is okay and alright. It doesn’t make you stupid or any less of a valuable human being.

It is okay to admit and state that your mental health (or physical health) condition will not allow you to safely and reliably do something most people can. Your condition is not something you asked for nor is it something that is easily controlled or “just got over”. Not everyone can do everything, and when you have a mental condition or physical condition that disables some of your functioning, that is even more so. With that being said, just because you can’t do this thing, it doesn’t mean you can’t do anything and it doesn’t detract from your inherent value as an individual. You are doing your best with the cards you have / were dealt, and it is okay to not be able to do everything. If you feel the need to hate yourself and criticize yourself, I understand where you are coming from - but I just want to remind you from both a mental health advocate and as someone who was in that position, it is okay that you can’t and you are just as valuable and lovable as anyone else. It isn’t your fault you can’t do it. You are trying your best with what you have.

You don’t need to be mean to yourself or hate yourself. There are a lot of people who can’t drive for a large number of reasons ranging from physical, to learning, to mental issues. You aren’t alone in not being able to do this, and things will be okay even if you can’t.

We still support you, and those that around you that are good for you should not care that you can’t work out driving. 

It is okay to not be able to do something. You are still an amazing lovable human being.

But anyways, those are my thoughts and personal experiences with this kind of issue and situation. I hope it helped and I really hope you figure this out! Best of luck regardless of if you decide to go for it, go for it later, or to mark it off of the list all together and I hope you have a lot of good luck and good results for whichever decision you make.

-Riku (Host)

[theaetherwitch]

Ethics in Magick: A Gray Understanding

- from my grimoire

An Important Thing to Note

As preface to this article, i would like to say these are simply my own opinions. These opinions are based off my own experiences, and things that I have learned throughout the years. This article is meant to be thought provoking and informative, which can make it lean on the more controversial side. Morality and ethics are very complicated and very touchy. There are many ways to view the world around you and this is simply how I personally view things. Don’t ever feel like this is exactly how things are or how they are going to be, because it’s not. Gray doesn’t come in just one shade, it comes in many.

Everyone views the world around them differently, so take this article with a grain of salt.

Things are More Then They Seem

When talking about ethics in magick, it can be easy to see things in a very black and white manner, ie: good is good, and evil is evil. This is why we see terms like “White Witch” or “Black Magick”. At some point during the long history of The Craft, someone felt the need to draw a thick line between positive and negative aspects. If something is one way, then it must inherently have an opposite. The sun and moon, masculine and feminine, light and dark, black and white, yin and yang. These are all things that have a counterbalance with each other. But as time passes and ideals change, these aspects begin to meld to create something entirely different. The color gray, or as my covenmates like to say “Androgynous Energy”. Energy that is nothing and everything all at the same time. It is not good nor is it evil, it exists in a completely neutral state. And that’s where we’ll begin.

Evil Good, and Good Evil

I’d like to really delve into this topic by saying, yes. There are good things in the world, and there are evil things in the world. No denying that at all, but for the majority of things, theres much more to it. A good example would be someone who shoplifts. On the surface, this is a crime and seen as wrong, and I don’t disagree with that, but take into consideration other things as well. Does this person have food, clothing, and shelter readily available to them? Do they have mouths to feed? Can they afford to support themselves? In some cases, no they don’t, and the only way they can keep themselves or the people around them alive is by stealing. This is still very much a crime, and I don’t condone it, but for some people its all they can do.

You can look at magick much the same. Take hexes for example, something that specifically meant to harm another person. But have you even considered why people hex? Sometimes there is someone or something in your life thats toxic, abusive, and just down right nasty to you and you need to find a way to cut it out or make it understand the error of its ways. That’s where a hex comes in, and why they’re not evil by nature. Sometimes harm is necessary for your own, or another persons well being.

On the other side of that coin are regular spells. Something that is usually used for something positive, but even that has gray areas. Lets say someone casts a wealth spell. Are they doing it because they truly need money coming their way, or are they doing it for greedy and more materialistic reasons? These are questions that you must always ask before jumping to conclusions about someones actions. You never really know what someones intent is, unless they explicitly tell you. Good can very much be evil, just as evil can totally be good.

Think about this scenario. You’re a refugee in a warzone and you have a group of people with you, and you’re hiding and trying to escape death or capture. One of the members of your group is a baby and it begins to cry. Do you cover the babies mouth and risk suffocating the baby, or do you let the baby cry and risk the whole group being found and captured or killed?

What would you do in a situation like that? It’s complicated right? That’s what happens with morality in general. Things can get very convoluted and very hard to understand, that’s why looking at things from someone else’s perspective is very important. Nothing is black, just as nothing is white, there is always going to be more to a situation then just what you see on the surface.

Black Magick vs. White Magick

Personally, I do not like these terms. They make people think that these are the only ways to practice their craft, and gives a very limited view. It can scare someone away from magick, and that's the opposite effect we want. The craft has already almost died before, we want it to grow and prosper and that requires people who practice, but that's besides the point. There is no inherant good or bad magick, there are only good and bad intentions of the practitioner.

Think of fire. In the wrong hands, fire can devistate not just a home, but an entire neighborhood or even city. But in the right hands, it completely changed how people grew and evolved. But just because fire can cause harm, does that make fire bad? No. What can make fire bad is someone who is handling it without proper knowledge of how to use it. Magick, like fire, is a tool, and it's up to the person using the tool to use it properly

Ethical Hexing: A Summary

Hexing, while commonly seen as a negative thing can very easily be turned on its head to become something positive. Honestly, Im going to make an entire seperate article on this, but I can give a really good example of how a hex can be positive. And I want you to think about this one and when/if you decide to perform a hex.

One of my covenmates has a hex that he will use if someone has done something majorly wrong to either him or a friend (things like abuse, assault, or manipulation and lying). "May they see the error of their ways" is the name of the hex. Yes, it is still entirely meant to cause harm, but that is only a short term effect. Someone realizing they've done something wrong can be a hard pill to swallow and open up alot of regrets in a persons mind, but in tern that gives them the chance to fix what they've done wrong and start becoming a better person. This hex can help turn someones life around.

If you're going to hex someone, think about how you're going to word it and think about what your true intentions are. Pick your words carefully and really think about how you want it to affect this person. Remember the wise words of the wendigo "The anger in your heart warms you now, but will leave you cold in your grave". Things that go around have a tendency to come back around, so when hexing someone make sure you're doing it for the right reasons, and not to just hurt someone for the hell of it.

And when it comes to hexing, I see nothing wrong with it in the long run. Negative emotions are something that everyone deals with, everyone. And sometimes you need to find a way to express these emotions, especially if there is a particular person who has caused them. Hexing, in the right context, can help you release this pent up emotion and keep you from exploding. Magick doesn't always have to be unicorns and rainbows.

Ethics of Love Spells

This is another place where magick can very much become gray. Love spells are something that I see plently of people on Tumblr practicing and honestly, my responce to that is a positive one, because I haven't seen (so far at least) anyone trying to force a particular person to love them. And thats very important when it comes to any matters in love. When making a love spell, don't try to force a specific person to bend to your will because it has very high chance of failing completely and blowing up in your face. Love spells work best when they're as vague as possible because that gives the universe the chance to bring someone to you that you actually belong with instead of just someone you think you belong with.

If you're making a love spell at a particular person, try to consider that persons feelings too, and put yourself in their shoes. Would you want someone creepily trying to force you to love them? Probably not. Other peoples feelings are just as important as your own. This brings me to my last topic.

Consent

Like in the physical world, consent in spiritual matters is just as important. Someones spiritual life and being are sacred to them, and unless they tell you it's okay to start meddling. DONT. Never try to perform any sort of healing or psychic surgery on someone unless they have given you explicit permission, because you could seriously hurt someone in the process. Whether that was your intention or not, it can happen. The spiritual and physical body are heavily connected, and when one is messed up, so is the other. Always, always, always get someones permission if you're doing anything to them other than just sending general positive vibes.

And that's about it! I hope this article made some of you think and that it helps expand your world view a little bit. If anyone has any sort of questions, please feel free to ask.

[sighfertryptich]

Im going to rant(ish), skip if you want.

So I was watching a video (its the “Generations React to Dan Howell and Eugene Lee Yang Coming Out On Youtube” video by FBE) and everyone started sharing their coming out stories, and everyone was sharing that they were either scared or felt a freak by it. I felt that I wanted to, considering this is the only platform I have on here that I can express myself to the fullest without judgement, share my own, even though I am not in an accepting household.

So, let me start out with this. Growing up, I thought I was straight. There were no signs of me feeling any different than other kids. I was one of the more innocent children, I didnt care about gender identity or sexuality. I just cared about who I was going to play with at recess. By the time I hit fifth grade, I was naïve to the fact that not everyone was attracted to everyone around them. I didn’t understand that some boys only liked girls, and some girls only liked boys. In my community, it was rare that the gays and lesbians understood what it was, so they werent around to put that knowledge in our vocabulary. To me, if you had a crush, it could be on either a female or a male, whether or not you were the same gender or the opposite.

Reaching middle school, about a year later, our views were widened. People around me were realizing or expressing their sexualities. I, on the other hand, still didn’t understand that there were labels to these things. (Keep in mind, there still weren’t lesbians or gays out in the open yet. Everyone was either bisexual or straight.)

When this new vocabulary came to light, I could finally attempt to put a name to myself, liking both men and women.

I accepted the term bisexual for myself at the ripe age of 11.

I didn’t plan on telling my parents. I never wanted to. They didnt have to know who I was imagining kissing, they didnt have to know who I had crushes on. To this day, I never planned on telling them until the day came that I would have to. As in, if the time came, I would tell them when I got engaged to a woman.

Throughout middle school, I was labeled bisexual. It just felt normal to like who I wanted to like, and the people I surrounded myself with accepted me. I guess I got lucky with that. Reaching into high school, I got my first serious woman x woman crush. Every single day, she’d come into class and I would just gush over her. She was gorgeous. And being honest, a ripe 13 year old me was in her scene phase, and this girl oozed alternative. She had a grunge look, part of her hair was dyed sea-foam green, and she was sweet and funny and kind. As far as I knew, she liked me back.

I remember my first Sadie Hawkins dance. I got with my school’s GSA (Gay Straight Alliance) Club and put together this whole thing where me and a couple friends made shirts that said “Will you go to Sadie Hawkins with me?” She said yes! but then later the dance was canceled and we just made other plans. As time went on, she led me on to thinking she liked me. I found out she didn’t and that she was wasting her time on me when she got with one of my guy friends.

This is when my chronic depression stepped its pussy up. Thank you Dan Howell for giving me that quote.

When I was 15, I moved to my small town a state over where I reside to this day. I was still labeling myself as bisexual. I met my first lesbian that year. (And yes, this was my first time meeting a lesbian. Im serious.) She became my best friend for the next 3 and a half years. She opened me to the world of different labels and helped me through finding out what I realized I truly was.

I was, and am, Pansexual. And a proud one at that. #PansexualPride.

I got my first serious girlfriend when I was 18. Or at least, I thought it was serious. I was head over heels for her. She claimed she was bisexual. [I say claimed because she admitted after we broke up that she was straight.]

Long story short, she used me to go to RenFest, then broke up with me a week later blaming her depression, then got with some dude a day later.

A couple of months later, I met a girl through an app called Amino. She was pansexual, like me, and we had a lot of the same interests. Only problem was that while I lived in Louisiana, she lived on an island off the coast of Florida.

Although our relationship didn’t last long, I added her because this was the first time in my entire life that I actually could see myself marrying a woman.

Let me explain.

Up until this point, I had only ever seen myself marrying a man. Yes, I had an attraction to women. Ive dated women, although not many, but never could see myself marrying any of them. Nothing wrong with that.

During this time, I cut my hair very short. Like, pixie-cut with an undercut. My intentions to cut it were that it’d be easier to put up into wigs when I cosplayed, and it’d be less to take care of and look good. We’ll come back to this later.

Directly after our 3 month anniversary, yes I do month anniversaries, I met my current girlfriend, Cole.

I swear, it was one of those moments where you see someone and you know they’re going to be in your life for years to come. [Fun fact - she told me that after she had met me for the first time, she joked with her friend that her and I “would have an August wedding” even though we barely had passed a few sentences between each other.] There’s just that feeling when you look someone in the eyes and know that there’s something special about them. Something you want - no, need - in your life, whether it’s to make a life-long decision or just to help you grow as a person.

I started dressing more comfortably. I no longer wore skirts or dresses. I wore jeans and t-shirts and hats and less makeup. I wore chains attached to my belt loops. All in all, I started looking more masculine, even though it was just me dressing comfortably. My job allowed it, I was earning the money to allow me to buy clothes like this. It made me happy. I started feeling more comfortable with more masculine terms rather than strictly feminine terms, ie. “mans, they, them, boy” etc. I wasn’t uncomfortable when someone said I looked like a boy, nor was I uncomfortable with my female body. I just didnt care. It wasnt insulting as I was raised to think it was. In fact, I encouraged it. I allowed - and still allow - people to think I was whatever gender they assigned me with. In all, I became Genderfluid. Gender Neutral, if you will.

Now, we’re going to back up just a tiny bit. Tee tiny, nothing big.

About a month before I met Cole, someone outted me to my mother. Keep in mind, I was never planning on coming out to her. My older sister is like me, Pansexual. She strives on the fact that she doesnt tell people she’s in a woman x woman relationship unless people directly ask. She doesnt label her sexuality. And I look up to her severely for that.

My mother is homophobic. She says she isn’t, and maybe she’s not, due to the fact she accepts my sister and her girlfriend, and hopes they get married someday. But for me, I was supposed to be the ray of hope. I was supposed to be blonde, straight, thin, cheerleading captain female who went to college and became highly successful. I wasn’t supposed to be the 5-foot-8, blue haired, overweight, artsy gender fluid kid she had who dropped out of high school, got their GED, and “doesnt show signs of responsibility” (- per my mother, who doesnt want to put me through college) kid she ultimately got.

Dressing how I felt was comfortable and loving who I wanted to love brought me hate from the one person who should love me unconditionally - my own mother. Most people were given hate by their peers, being called gay and butch. My hate was given from the person who gave me life. My mother has said that she regrets getting pregnant with me, and that she would’ve stopped after her first two kids. In fact, she had her tubes tied BEFORE she got pregnant with me. I was being born, with or without her consent. She has told me countless times that she feels like she failed as a parent due to the way I came out as an adult.

To this day, she tells me that I constantly look “too lesbian” or “too butch” and that I need to “go back to how I used to look”. She doesnt accept that I like women. She calls me a lesbian - and everyone knows that when you like both men and women, you’re very obviously not a lesbian. Ive told her countless times that I’m not a lesbian. But she never listens. She uses the term lesbian as anyone in middle school would use the word gay - as an insult.

It makes me confused. How could you raise your kid - which by the way, Im the first kid she raised on her own, her other two were raised with either my grandmother or the baby’s father - and tell them you’re disgusted by their happiness? How could you be okay with one pansexual daughter and hate the other?

(This next part might be TMI but it makes another avid point.)

How can you be okay with your daughter sending explicit pictures to a boy, but be disgusted by your daughter holding hands with a girl?

I still have to hide my relationship with Cole. It makes me sick to my stomach to not be able to say “Mom, this is my girlfriend.” with the girl I care ever so deeply for. I want to take her to family events and show her to the world, screaming at the top of my lungs that Cole is mine and mine alone.

Cole tells me that I’m an idiot when I get gushy. In fact, she’ll probably text me saying I made her cry (dont worry, its tears of love) if she gets to the end of this.

Cole is gorgeous. Even when I spend the night, and she’s got sleep in her eyes the next morning, teeth not yet brushed, hair a mess, making gross yawning faces, I still think she’s quite possibly the most beautiful person I’ve ever met. She’s always got me nonstop laughing, doubling over and straight up snorting sometimes. She’s caring and headstrong, not afraid to stand up for what she believes in.

I want to be able to show her off.

But I cant with a mother like mine.

So, long story short, I grew up in an accepting community. Fell hard for some men and some women. Grew up and realized who I was as a person. Found someone who accepts me through each and every questioning moment I have with myself. Yet, I cant show her off like the people around me all because of the one person who gave me life.

I guess you could say this is the end, but everyone knows its a To Be Continued. You just gotta roll with what life gives you, whether or not the people in your life are there to love you or hurt you.

If you got this far, I applaud and also thank you. I’m not able to rant to anyone like this, so if you took the time to read this, I appreciate it. No one wants to hear my story. If you do…

My name is Marley, and I am a Pansexual, Gender Neutral, KPop loving cosplayer who is not afraid to love who they want to love.

Thank you ♡

(Btw, sorry if I got off track towards the end. My mind wanders when telling stories. I wrote this on my phone so I’ll go back and add a “Keep Reading” thing if you’d rather just skip it.)

[stainedinlavenderblood]

Question thing tagged by @euthymiclurker

I tag @horse-boy @cinder-valestera @llunaruna @dieeisenkaiserin @pink-catnip

theres like 50 of them so im sticking them in the read more

1. What takes up too much of your time? being on Tumblr

2. What makes your day better?  when my friends get in call

3. What’s the best thing that happened to you today?  i went to a job fair and then got food at the burger king at my university for the first time and felt like i was adulting so good

4. What fictional place would you like to go to?  wherever i can find a real Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy and use it to go anywhere in the universe

5. Are you good at giving advice? i don’t know, i like to think so but sometimes i feel like i’m not approaching the problem people want advice on in any correct manner 

6. Do you have a mental illness? many 

7. Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis? nope

8. What musician inspires you the most? Tally Hall, i really like the variety in the way their music sounds and the way they can make nonsense lyrics sound so compelling and catchy

9. Have you ever fallen in love? many times, and every time i break up with someone my brain does its damnedest to fall in love again asap

10. What’s your dream date? getting food at somewhere we both like or showing one of us a place the other likes and then going home to play video games or watch something n fall asleep while cuddling

11. What do others notice about you? my sarcastic and/or straight-up rude shirts (i have one that says “not shy, just don’t like you” and the like dean of my university or something saw it and let me tell you i wanted to die.)

12. What’s an annoying habit you have? i don’t like to talk on voice calls for various reasons (most of which are out of my control but its also largely because i just don’t like talking in general) so everyone who calls me has to put up with me typing

13. Do you still talk to your first love? i have dated or had a crush on so many people i don’t even know who to call my first love. i had a crush on some girl when i was in preschool, i shouldve been thinking about legos and when the next time mom was making mac n cheese was

14. How many exes do you have? uh like 5

15. How many songs are in your playlist? which one. i have like so many. one playlist has over 1,500 songs in it

16. What instruments can you play? none of them. i tried trumpet once but i was no good at it

17. What do you have the most pictures of? anime girl reaction pics

18. Where would you like to go before you die? to my bed

19. What’s your zodiac? scorpio

20. Do you relate to it? sometimes

21. What is happiness to you? having no pressing responsibilities

22. Are you going through anything right now? adjusting to living in a college dorm

23. What’s the worst decision you ever made? being a gifted child and believing any of the shit they told me

24. What’s your favorite store? i don’t shop much but i guess fry’s grocery store??

25. What’s your opinion about abortion? life is not nearly as sacred as people make it out to be. i think some people need to accept that life is not as nice as they think it is and sometimes shit happens. if a woman doesnt want her baby for any reason i don’t care, especially because its not even born yet, its in no way taking an innocent life cause that thing isnt even fully formed yet anyways. there are a lot of steps matter has to take to become life and things can go wrong on literally all of them

26. Do you keep a bucket list? nope

27. Do you have a favorite album? the crypt of the necrodancer soundtrack is a fuckin banger

28. What do you want for your birthday? money

29. What are people’s first impressions of you? probably that i’m very quiet or i look like i really don’t want to be there

30. What age do you seem according to most people? people usually think im a few years younger than i am for some reason

31. Where do you keep your phone while you’re sleeping? on my desk or sometimes i fall asleep and wake up to find i was laying on it

32. What word do you say the most? ye

33. What’s the oldest age you would date? 20

34. What’s the youngest you would date? 17

35. What job/career do most people say would suit you? people don’t usually give me suggestions but they agree when i say what i want to do

36. What’s your favorite music genre? i don’t know i like a lot of kinds of music. i like some weird obscure genres like speedcore or gabber or something but i usually don’t say that. i just say i like “experimental” music most of the time

37. If you could live in any country in the world, where would it be? nowhere is safe as long as the US is still a world power

38. What is your current favorite song? The Correspondents - INEXPLICABLE

39. How long have you had this blog for? since September 21st, 2013. so, way too long

40. What are you excited for? the next time i get a lot of money so i can blow it all on video games for me n my friends

41. Are you a better talker or listener? im not bad at talking but i dont like to do it so i mostly listen

42. What was the last productive thing you did? worked on problems for an initial knowledge check for my math class thats starting on friday

43. What do you want for Christmas? to go home

44. What class do you get the best grades in? usually english

45. On a scale of 1-10, how are you feeling right now? ???

46. What can you see yourself doing in ten years? laying in bed and fighting off the ever-present feeling of wanting to just give up no matter how good things get

47. When did you get your first heartbreak? in like 4th grade

48. What age do you want to get married? it doesn’t matter to me much as long as we don’t like have a kid

49. What career did you want to have as a child? astronaut... i still really want to but i know that commercial space travel the way i want it will never become a reality in my lifetime and nor will we meet aliens

50. What do you crave right now? a more comfortable chair. the one they gave me in my dorm is not comfortable at all

[understandableparadox]

the beginning of a legend of zelda thing between me and a friend

solved paradox

you are a hero... a hero reborn time and time again, a summery of penultimate bravery. of unyielding courage, of time tested perseverance. a soul immortalized by the goddess... yet you are tired... so...so tired, time and time again fighting against the soul of the great evil, aided by the soul of a princess... ah... the warm golden hands of the goddess farore... goddess of courage,  the soul of demise is held by the goddess din and the soul of the princess is held in the hands of nayru... the cycle comes again. maybe this time...wait...the other two are gone but the farore remains...perhaps she has something to ask of you...

https://pm1.narvii.com/6819/9702d5dfdd9283e5dea69f1baba0b3f882c4cdbbv2_hq.jpg

Little Spotlight

You try and give a quick wave.

solved paradox

"im sorry... as a hero it must hurt seeing he goddess you will come to worship in your life carting the soul of your enemy back to the world of the living."

Little Spotlight

He sighed, just for now you would indulge them. Giving them a quick nod.

solved paradox

"I want things to stop... that’s why... your mission is not to kill and seal away his soul again. it is to destroy the soul of the dark god of demise."

Little Spotlight

He raised a brow...but didn't stop her.

solved paradox

"do you remember him...? it was life times ago, back when your blade could still speak and lead you. back when the hylians lived among the clouds on their islands..."

Little Spotlight

He mouthed the words but never uttered the name. FI

solved paradox

"I ask the impossible from the soul of a hero who has done the impossible. the foe is not ganondorf, nor ganon. it is demise, end this so the souls may rest, ask of me a gift to help you kill a god."

Little Spotlight

He took a moment. While still in between lives, he glimpsed between his lives. Every Experience he knew, every Ganon.

solved paradox

every ganondorf was the male born of the gerudo, one who forged a path though shear power, every disadvantage was broken and turned to a blade for him to weild, only for his mind and body to be taken over by the dark god of demise, whose fate would then be to meet an end at the end of the master sword.(edited)

Little Spotlight

He had been a champion betrayed, a minish hero, a hero split, a hero of time, ventured through the twilight, glimpsed into his times failed...so much. And he did decided. This time i will be the gerudo.

solved paradox

she seemed a bit worried...  "then you will be born side by side with ganondorf, please be ready... but I cannot consider such a life to be a gift, please, ask of me one more thing."

Little Spotlight

He thought about it. What he needed most, how he could use most effectively. Grant me the knowledge of the heroes shade in this next life.

solved paradox

she nods, the heroes soul is enveloped in your hand... you have not been reborn, but you could see your old mentor, the man who appers as both a skeleton and a wolf. he takes a knee and bows... it dissolves and becomes apart of you... his knowledge of blade and body become yours...  "good luck link..."  your vision begins to fade.

Little Spotlight

Maybe this once...he could rest.

The Brothers

solved paradox

your first taste of life would be of mass panic, female voices talking quickly, their words gibberish as your held in someones warm arms.

Little Spotlight

He tries to open his eyes once more.

solved paradox

You can see your mothers face, cradled in her other arm is another baby...

Little Spotlight

There he was...

Little Spotlight

He would have to keep his calm.

solved paradox

easy enough, given you retained no memories of the goddesses plea. your brother was asleep.

Little Spotlight

He looked to the mother above him.

solved paradox

shes crying.

Little Spotlight

He tried to reach for her.

solved paradox

she hugged you and your bother close to her...

Little Spotlight

He tried patting her face.

solved paradox

6 years later...life among the gerudo women was good, the small hub seemed ready to help take care of the two sole males collectively, with them you would be trained with a spear and dagger.

Little Spotlight

He tried to excel at both. Weapons naturally feeling great in his hands.

solved paradox

your brother would try to learn with you, he would use a sword and bow.

Little Spotlight

He wanted to make his mother proud.

solved paradox

that’s hard to tell sometimes... its almost as if she looks at you both with animosity behind your back...

Little Spotlight

He still tried his best, if not her then his instructors.

solved paradox

two women who were able to weave together magic, under their tutelage, they would show you the steps to a deadly dance, your partner the spear and dagger, how to step away or press forward, how to make something inanimate a living extension of the arm.

Little Spotlight

This dance was nice...he wanted to learn all of the dances he could. Even the ones his brother learned.Though he never said this...he never said anything.

solved paradox

the mute often get to hear things others dont... you could hear the tutors shouting at your brother for breaking the equipment or striking blindly. you can hear the talk of the town, the gossip of your mother being cursed...

Little Spotlight

Cursed? No she was great...he tried to gather something for her. Maybe some flowers, yeah a crown of them.

solved paradox

rather hard to find in the desert...

Little Spotlight

He was confident he could do it.

solved paradox

would you take anyone with you to help you look?

Little Spotlight

He needed his brother to hold attention. Maybe one of the other kids around.

solved paradox

after asking around, a few of they young girls of the village admitted that they got most of their flowers from pocket money when travelers came around

Little Spotlight

he scrunched his face. He wanted to do something better than that. He'll find one himself. Of course he's not going to let himself get caught at the gate...so he climbs over one of the side walls.

solved paradox

https://i.redd.it/3hb54c7xs6o01.jpg

the world is wide for a child...

Little Spotlight

He still had a dagger and spear... so he could handle it. He marched off into the desert.

solved paradox

its hot out there... out on the mountain you can see the god of the gerudo, vah naboris, behind you, the pillar stone that endlessly spouts water, way points.

Little Spotlight

He gave a quick prayer to van naboris. And scooted off.

solved paradox

where would you head to?

Little SpotlightToday at 2:10 PM

west.

solved paradox

west was more of the same... maybe you can get some of the flowers from the cactus that grow about.

Little Spotlight

He would do so...they would be neat...he cut down a cactus. And get a few flowers.

solved paradox

~gained 3 desert flowers~!~

https://knpr.org/sites/default/files/public/styles/detail_large/public/images/story/cactus2a.jpg?itok=a-PXM1ce

Little Spotlight

He decided...one more. He just needed something to tie it together.He did a little bit more just a little bit more.

solved paradox

how so? the flowers dont have vines...

Little Spotlight

Maybe not these but he was sure he could find ones that did.

solved paradox

ah~! there~! the vines that grow the hydro melons~!

Little Spotlight

*Ah he grabbed two of them and scuttled back home.

solved paradox

your brother covered for you perfectly~!

Little Spotlight

He got to work quickly to make a crown using the vines. He waited for mama to come pick them up from training. He wanted everyone to see mama get a crown and some melons.

solved paradox

as the sun comes down your mother comes to pick you up for the day.

Little Spotlight

He quickly a scampers up to his mother a set of freshly picked hydromelons hugged in grasp and in his grasp a crown of flowers. He raised himself on his toes and puffed his chest as he offered them to her.

solved paradox

she smiled down at you and hugged you, leaning down so you can put the flower crown on her.

Little Spotlight

He set the crown on her head. And with his hands free he offered her the fruits. He was glad to see her smile.

solved paradox

she set the fruits in the basket and lead you and your brother home...

Little Spotlight

He followed her with a cheery smile.

solved paradox

mutes get to hear a lot...

they can hear when someone comes into their room...

they can be silent enough to make their mother think that they are still asleep...

they can hear their silent sobs as they stand at the side of their brothers bed...

they can hear the thrashing.

Little Spotlight

Thrashing?

solved paradox

they can hear the muffled child screams...

Little Spotlight

He peered from under the cover.

solved paradox

your mother is holding your brothers head under a pillow. tears running down her face...

Little Spotlight

His chest heaved as he jumped out of bed trying to pull mama off of her brother. He didn't know why she was hurting brother.

solved paradox

in his struggle, you can see gold light pouring from the back of his hand...

Little Spotlight

That didn't matter, mama was hurting brother. He tried to pry her away. "Gah!" At least one sound escaped his lips.

solved paradox

in the panic, your brother pushed your mother, hard...hard enough to bury her in the ceiling, then to fall to the ground limp.

Little Spotlight

He looked to his brother panicked. Then over to his mother. He tried to check on her.

solved paradox

no pulse....you can hear him gasp for air.

Little Spotlight

He dragged her to the door. He screamed out the best he could. "Hahh!" He needed to get her help. Anyone.

solved paradox

they were slow to wake, but the guards would quickly take her to the med ward... another would go inside, only to find a whole in the wall of the room and the walls of the city...

your name is link.

your mother is dead.

your brother has earned the cursed name of ganondorf.

[batgirl-87]

So @mdeenise “challenged” me to answer all of the questions from this Hogwarts Mystery Asks: MC. I’ve already answered some (can check ‘asks’ or ‘ask game’ tags, I’ll also link them in my Masterlist) so I’ll answer the rest I haven’t been asked yet here because

1. What is their whole name? 

Nereida Adelyn-Keira LaFontaine Black

5. How is there relationship with Jacob?

Keira and Jacob were very close - it was them against the world! They’re very protective of one another, they can get/have gotten into a lot of trouble together, both with a rebellious, mischievous streak; but they are also siblings so there’s teasing, embarrassing each other, lots of physical ‘play fighting’ - they’re very much like I can be mean to my sibling but if you’re mean to them I’ll hurt you. Clearly when he ‘disappeared’ it was devastating for Keira and she felt completely alone. 

6. How is their relationship with their parents?

Both Keira and Jacob loved their mom who was their primary caregiver. Keira honestly doesn’t really remember her dad much but Jacob hates him. She has a vague recollection of him and Regulus and Sirius, a bit better memory of Sirius who kept in contact with her and Jacob even after they moved to Canada, possibly to spite his parents but Keira thinks he actually cares about his younger half-siblings even if it was something that started out from spite or curiosity. 

When their mom died of course Jacob and Keira were very sad over their loss. They were then taken in by their mom’s close friends and moved to Canada from Ireland and while there was an adjustment period they both appreciate the care they provided, and while Jacob and Keira didn’t exactly feel like they belong in this ‘family’ their mom’s friends were great parental figures and they do care about them and appreciate everything they’ve done for them. Their dad was nonexistent in their lives after the passing of their mom (he passed soon after the next year, after the death of Regulus) but when they arrived in the UK to attend Hogwarts they did find savings left for them from their dad in Gringotts (safe to assume without his wife’s knowledge). 

So both love their mom and ‘adopted’ parents (unofficially adopted =p) and while Jacob hates their dad and views him as a manipulative, selfish, neglectful arse, Keira is pretty neutral and apathetic about her dad since she doesn’t really remember him all that well. But she appreciates the money! =p 

8. How’s their relationship with their family?

Ahahahahahaha - I’m cackling =p

Unfortunately, the family on Keira and Jacob’s mom’s side are all pretty much passed or they have no idea who they are =p Their mom and mom’s parents are passed and their mom had no siblings since her mom died relatively soon after her birth (undines...) As stated before, Jacob and Keira appreciate and care very much for their mom’s friends who took them in after her passing, although a bit of awkwardness since it’s not ‘really’ their family...

As for the Black side of their family *more cackling* Orion seemed much more interested in their mom than them and didn’t seem to want much to do with them, at least according to Jacob. Walburga hates them and this whole situation, of course! With good reason! She honestly probably would of had them killed. She focused most of her energy on ensuring this scandal did not get out into the public and was probably very relieved when they moved across the pond. Of course when Jacob returned to attend Hogwarts he was done living this lie and didn’t care who it upset and went by his Black family name, encouraging his sister to do the same - this family would not win! Walburga could try to deny it all she wanted but a paternity test (which I’ve done some research on Wizarding World paternity tests and some interesting ideas came up!) just proved it.

Despite this, Walburga and the rest of the Black family continued to ignore their entire existence. Andromeda may have been left out of the loop considering she was disowned from the family as well but when Keira and Tonks realized they were both related to Bellatrix Lestrange, and therefore related themselves, Keira was so happy to be accepted by some members of the Black family. Sirius also was accepting of his younger half-siblings and stayed in contact with them even after they moved to Canada. He may have only gone to see them at first out of curiosity and then continued to visit and communicate with them out of spite to his parents but he probably did care about them and enjoyed them more than Regulus because they weren’t brought up in a pureblood elitist household. Probably wished their mom was his mom which would just upset Walburga. And if Walburga didn’t hate them before, after she passed, Keira, now more spiteful and daring with everything that has happened, moved into the now empty (well except for Kreacher) 12 Grimmauld Place which would just piss Walburga off! How she convinced Remus, no idea - basically she was like I’m doing this and Remus had to go along with it =p

Wait, is Kreacher family? Keira and Kreacher argue a lot and she will not stand for him being mean to Remus or any of her friends and will threaten to kick him out although it’s an empty threat because she wouldn’t actually kick him out and make him homeless! Kreacher of course thinks she’s invading some place that does not belong to her but because she is a Black she sort of does belong there and while not related to his previous Walburga, she is to Orion so he has to put up with her =p They eventually reach an understanding. Kreacher is free to stay there and does not have to do any chores or cleaning up after her or Remus, as long as he’s nice... or just stays away from her friends and Remus. 

I’m not sure how Regulus felt about them, maybe neutral? I think discovering his dad’s affair would be a shock to him, he might be curious as well to meet them and I like to think did meet them at least once, possibly while their mom was passing (like Orion went to see her and Sirius and Regulus decided to go as well because, hey, it is their younger siblings whether they like it or not and it’s a hard thing to go through) but I think he was more worried and concerned about Death Eater affairs and tricking Voldemort =p

So while Keira is close with Tonks, and probably her parents as well, and both Keira and Jacob are accepted by Sirius, and maybe even Regulus, who knows =p, most of the Black family still pretends they don’t exist. Although I like to think Keira later bonds with Draco and they become close and overall these next generations are going to be better. And while Bellatrix may refuse to acknowledge Keira’s relationship to her, deep down she actually really likes Keira because she’s a strong, tough bitch who isn’t afraid of her and would have killed Dumbledore without even being a Death Eater if asked =p Seriously, Keira knows she’s actually Bella’s favorite. 

(This also pretty much works for my original HP OC bio where she was Sirius’ daughter because besides Tonks, Andromeda, and Ted, the rest of the Black family wouldn’t really acknowledge her existence either)

Does Remus count as family? Of course he does, he’s “Uncle Remus!” =p Remus and Keira had an instant bond, they are incredibly close - I like to think of it as two people who felt completely alone in the world found each other and now they were not longer alone. Keira is very much like Sirius, and Jacob can be very much like James actually, so it was actually nice for Remus to be around them if not bittersweet. I actually have a post about Keira and Remus’ relationship so I won’t say too much more besides they are very close and Keira is suuuuper protective over him.

9. Do they have any other siblings?

Sirius and Regulus Black

11. Do they have pets?

Keira has a Siamese cat and Jacob had a Barred Owl named Archimedes which I guess is hers now too? Jacob also wanted a dog or crup but then went to school so their ‘adoptive’ parents are taking care of it =p

14. Any crushes?

Charlie Weasley.

She won’t outright admit it but it’s obvious to everyone else besides Charlie. Wasn’t even aware of it herself for quite awhile! =p But fortunately she plays it pretty cool and isn’t a stuttering mess around him so maybe he has no idea she likes him because she’s so chill and nonchalant about it. Although she can be flirtatious but she can be like that with a lot of people =p (She’s related to Sirius she can’t help it! =p)

16. Have they ever dated someone before (Either back at their home or at Hogwarts)?

Rumour has it during her summer before Sixth Year, where she spent most of it in Canada, and going into Sixth Year she was dating someone. Has not been confirmed nor denied. 😜

(I think that’s all of them? Wasn't that much actually, I expected more =p But I still wrote a lot more than intended so sorry about that! Hope I explained things well enough! If anyone has any questions or want to talk about MC’s more hit me up! Thanks for your challenge! 😉💙)

[gleesthertite1976-blog]

Now I putting myself on track because even if I still working out and running a lot, I find junk food makes me feel like shit. After a prolonged time of eating too much of it, my body doesn feel good and my mental state is even worse. It makes me depressed about things.. I got Origin Premier to try out Anthem Early and boi am I disappointed. This post sums up exactly what I thought of the campaign missions (boring and repetitive) not to mention server lag and overall game lag (sometimes when I ads my gun it gets stuck for about 5 seconds on the animation of my lancer lifting their gun and this is just one example of this. Many times in one mission my character will get stuck doing things like flying in a direction, spamming abilities, and freezing on an animation.) It didn do this during the beta. I could hardly hear them over the rain, the trembling of the house, and the explosive roar of the tornado a couple streets over. The windows were bulging in and out a good foot, but I was just immobilized looking out those windows. I remember I was not afraid, I was overwhelmed by the beauty of the ferocity of the storm and complete overload on the senses.. IMO faking makeup skill falls more into "selling" than "making art" category since we call them gurus. We all dealt with good salespeople and crappy ones. Shoot, a decent chunk of my income comes from sales commissions (much different industry tho), and I as honest and forthright and helpful to my clients as I can be.. Ed 김천출장샵 kind of a terrible ambassador for Union culture. When he went back down to talk to the alien leader, he started talking about how they an advanced society. I assumed he was going to point out that the alignment of the stars was different on different planets, and Kelly was born under Aquarius (or whatever) on Earth and Bortus was born under the Moon of Mumbojumbo on Moclus, and neither Aquarians nor Mumbojumbans have been observed to have the same tendencies as their Jilliacs. I ran through an Italian grammar on my way across the Atlantic, and from my knowledge of Latin, Spanish, and French, I soon had a reading acquaintance with the language. I had really wanted to go to Germany, that I might carry forward my studies in German literature, and I first applied for the 김천출장샵 consulate at Munich. The powers at Washington thought it quite the same thing to offer me Rome; but I found that the income of the Roman consulate would not give me a living, and I was forced to decline it. I don pretend to be a Hendrix but its true, more money more problems. When you dont have money the nececities are your problem, food, rent, utilities, etc. Once you have that money you can try to conquer your real deeply rooted problems and you realize you can cure them with money. There was some disappointment, especially from my youngest son at the time who said his heart was broken when he found out his sister was actually a brother. But the disappointment didn last long and he wouldn trade his baby brother for the world now. When your holding your perfect little baby it hard to feel anything but love for them. Once you start working you soon realize that you can always pick and choose where you want to work. Sometimes you need to take a coding job for the next FPS game or sometimes you need to add in and update the framework for online play. Maybe you the one that needs to go in and clean up all the textures or maybe it your job to add in the lootboxes.

[krystalia-productions]

Suave’s Bio

AU: Candy Factory Dicetale AU

Name: Sans Zariaki (Sans Hudson) Nickname(s): Dice (mostly just in his AU), Suave Sex: Male Age: 30 Species: Skeleton monster Sexuality: Pansexual Height: 5'3 Weight: 140 lbs Birthday: December 23rd Relationship Status: Single Likes: being stylish, having the finer clothes and all. Being mostly away from others. His more darker and or secretive jobs that he does. Being able to pretty much do what he wants. Being better than his family. Peppermint candy. Making magical potions as a secretive second job. Also likes seeing blood spill, and sometimes even splatter. He also likes sword fighting, and even has a training room for such. Enjoys making smaller sweets and basic cooking. Also reading and watching anime. Favorite color is blue. Really likes various kinds of tea. Dislikes: His biological parents. Being frustrated and or tired. Being rich and kinda well-known. Also being rejected as a person. Being out in public and being recognized. Not knowing much about his brother. When he fails to create a potion or even when it blows up in his face. When he's forgetful. Any scars he has. Personality: Suave is insane and surprisingly hard-working when it comes to his job, which he doesn’t like all that much. He is also a bit of a flirt if you are around him and you are appealing to him, personality or style wise. He doesn't expect flirtation back (as he isn't around others often) but when it does happen, he easily becomes a bit shy as well as his face becoming rather flushed. He also certainly doesn’t expect any advances either.

Not only does Suave make candy for a living, but he makes all kinds of magical potions as a more secretive job. This is one of the favorite parts of his day to him, as he enjoys creating such things. He hand bottles each of them, and makes each of the bottles their own labels.

He also like swords and knives, and even is extremely skilled with such weapons. He loves to practice with the sharp items, and even uses them on training dummies to get out frustration or anger that he does not want. Also, he can definitely throw knives with hella good aim.

He also of course enjoys some games such as Chess, Checkers, and other classic board games (especially monopoly, of course).

Other things are that he does know ASL (american sign language), he still has the white and black jacket and blue converse his mother and father gave him, he has self-harmed before and still has light scars, but does not currently self-harm anymore, plays the saxophone and the violin, and doesn't use his magic too often (except if an intruder gets violent, but he likes threatening with his sword even more).

Background: (Note: all is already on the surface. If you have not noticed already, this AU is very different) Suave was a pretty happy child, and he always tried to help his parents with anything they needed. His family was pretty poor, so he never really asked for anything, so he just played whatever board games they had and learned whatever he could. His parents didn't care much for him, but taught him stuff he should know (cooking, cleaning, etc), but taught him not to speak much, and mostly sign. When his brother came along, Suave was overjoyed. He couldn't wait to spend more time with his new baby brother. Unfortunately, their parents thought otherwise, and decided they didn’t want kids plaguing their lives and taking up extra money. Both Suave and Nikolai (Papyrus) were put up for adoption, and were eventually separated from each other. It's unknown where Nikolai ended up going. Suave on the other hand, was adopted by an older man, an owner of a small candy shop, by the name of Jeremiah Hudson. Suave was depressed for the first two months of being adopted by Jeremiah, but soon after they started growing closer little by little. Jeremiah happily taught Suave how to make different kinds of candies and chocolate, which is where Suave found his love for peppermint candy. Not only this, but he also taught Suave some sword fighting skills and how to throw knives for sport. Through the years, Suave enjoyed being in the home and company of Jeremiah, and even started calling him his father. The candy shop had gained more popularity as well, which wasn't a bad thing until the shop was robbed by armed men and monsters, and both Suave and Jeremiah were injured severely. Although, Suave did drive them out with threats and some fighting back with magic and even some knives. Suave was able to survive and recover, but ended up with some scars (the scars on his face and a few on his ribcage). Jeremiah did not survive and ended up dying a week later of the crime. Suave did not take the news well, as he went into depression and basically become emotionless. By this time, Suave was 25 years old, and could live without Jeremiah, but the loss was too much for him. When he was released from the hospital and made it home, he snapped (or went insane I should say).

Suave gained ownership of the candy shop, as Jeremiah had no other family, and had put Suave in his will to take it after he was adopted. He kept the shop running the way Jeremiah had it, but eventually started making much bigger plans. Better recipes for the candy and chocolates, and ways to get it to places he couldn't. His insanity took over and he went for something bigger than ever. This lead to the big factory being built, and while it was, he gained more knowledge about swords and knives, potion making, and preservation of body organs or parts.. When the factory was finished, he isolated himself in the place, with some secret workers to help him out there. He found the finer side of life, and got himself into new styles he never knew of, and eventually became the skeleton he is today. Since he doesn't go out much, he doesn't really have any friends. (besides those who might be from other AUs.) He still creates all the candies and chocolates that his adoptive father made, along with some added flavors. His seperate job inside the factory consists of selling potions (he's still learning tbh) and diving into bodies for organs and even cutting off certain limbs. Normally he grabs intruders in his factory unless he's not really feeling like it. He uses these things for some potion recipes.

.:Relationships:. (Canon in AU) Nikolai (Papyrus) Zariaki (Candy Factory AU!Dicetale!Papyrus)- Suave barely got to know him since they were separated from each other so early after Nikolai’s birth. Suave hasn't seen him since and has always worried for him, but with him not knowing where he is, and not having much time to look, there isn't much he can do.

Alyssandra and Gaster Zariaki (biological parents)- Suave doesn't particularly like either of his parents after putting both him and his brother up for adoption without a single thought or care. He hasn't seen them since then, and hasn't cared about them since then as well.

Jeremiah Hudson (adoptive human father)- Suave had a great relationship with him, and even called him his father after a while of living with him. Jeremiah taught him all kinds of new things, but lead him on the road to his candy factory in the end. Suave lost him when he was 25 years old and snapped after being released from the hospital. He's been messed up since Jeremiah’s death.

(Canon with other AUs)

Dice(Classic Dicetale! Sans) - they don't meet up much. It's rare that they even really talk to each other. Dice just likes to check up on him, knowing that Suave (on the inside) has a lot going on in his head. Sometimes they switch clothes so that Suave can get away from the factory for little bit. Dice doesn't mind the stylish clothing or attitude he has, Suave is just trying to cope after all.

Rice(Evil AU! Dice) - the two don't really get along, despite them both being killers. Suave doesn't agree with killing innocents, or those whom you don't know if they have done anything horrible or not. Rice does drink a lot and vent about his problems to Suave, knowing Suave doesn't really listen or really care, nor does he go out much. So it's unlikely anyone would hear about Rice’s whining. Rice is that one customer that buys most of Suave’s smoke bomb potions though!

Thrice(Happy Ending AU! Dice) - These two get along pretty well, even if Thrice doesn't approve of him killing those who come into his factory without permission. They have some pretty delightful conversations and Thrice sometimes helps with making new recipes for candies, which makes Suave a little more delighted about the candy part of his job.

World Domination AU! Dice - they don't talk too much, as this Dice is normally quiet most of the time. Sometimes he creeps Suave out when he stares intently. Either way, Suave lets him try safe recipes when needed and this Dice finds delight in the wonderful tastes of the candy Suave makes.

((yeah, i made him a bio. a while ago actually. i just recently updated the last part, but i still might update some later. if you would like for one of your certain character to have some form of relationship with him, always feel free to ask. i dont mind. with any of my characters as a matter of fact. but anyway, enjoy this boi’s bio))

[verngyu-moved]

man, if using stock photos for moodboards bothers you, how do you feel about memes? because those are literally ripped and reused from just about anywhere and everywhere. i get following fansite rules is important, but this is also the internet, and IP laws do allow for transformation of existing works. if you get so caught up on making sure that everything is perfectly credited, etc., you'll just suck the fun out of everything. i'm not trying to attack you, but i disagree with your post

i wasnt even referring about fansites in that post, i was strictly talking about the aesthetic photos you see, but yeah editing fansites’ photos they declare uneditable are an enormous no and im definitely not budging on that lol.

i think crediting the source of where u find memes is a good idea too, and i encourage every1 to do so when they can. but most the time when theyre used theyre not meant to gain notes, just to express an emotion. thats where i think moodboards & memes differ

i think its unfair to say just because its posted on the internet you can do whatever you want to something somebody else made without their permission and knowledge. like i said in the post, people do not forfeit their ownership rights over their creations when it reaches the web.personally if i had a website dedicated to my photography and found out someone altered one of my photos without asking first i’d be pretty mad. ik not all photographers feel that way but its better to be safe than sorry. its the same reason you shouldnt edit fancams if you dont know if they allow it.

and, “you’ll just suck the fun out of everything” –its already not fun for the works of ppl who didnt want their property taken & reworked. its fine for you to disagree with me, i always welcome a dialogue when it comes to opinionated posts i make, but i guess we’ll just have to agree to disagree. i dont think respecting peoples’ rules is that much to ask for, especially when they go out of their way to spend their own time & money to photograph stuff. you’ll survive if you cant use a certain photo for a moodboard to post on tumblr.

ps, the photos posted to weheartit/pinterest/instagram are not stock photos nor are they royalty free, im a graphic design major and we cant even trace stuff for our first draft projects unless we know the source’s license allows it.