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imtryingbuck · 2 months

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Three simple words

~ gif not mine credit to owner ~

Pairing: Steve Rogers x fem!Reader

Summary: Steve tells you he loves you

Word count: 1,640

Warnings: fluff, tiny mention of our Stevie boy having to pleasure himself, swearing

A/N: I wrote this ages ago and wanted it gone from my drafts. It’s shit but have fun reading🙂

Masterlist

Steve knew he was in trouble when he heard your laugh for the first time, it warmed his body and melted the iron bars from around his heart. He followed the sound like a lost puppy, and when he looked through the windows he saw you.

Your eyes shined so brightly he was convinced they could light up a dark room. The huge smile on your face made your cheeks puff out, your hair was all over the place slightly looking like you had been electrocuted.

But to him, you were the most beautiful woman he has ever laid eyes on.

“-ah here’s Steve” Bucky’s voice pulled him out of his trance.

“Huh?” There was that laugh again making him all fuzzy inside.

“Come in then punk, everyone you obviously know who this is and Steve this is everyone”

“Great introductions Buck”

“I know” His best friend smiled before turning back to the class “I want Y/n and Donny to spar next, thanks” Bucky winked at Steve then whispered “I saw you watching her, you creep. You’re going to love her Stevie”

Before Steve can even try and defend himself he sees you getting into the ring with a huge guy, who was clearly ten times bigger than you, he’s heart stopped.

Watching you move around the ring dodging hits from your opponent, getting a few good shots in yourself he had to admit you was doing good considering how big this Donny guy was.

He felt a tinge of jealousy when you looked at Bucky and winked. He didn’t see it coming nor did he suspect it but when you walking straight up to Donny grabbing his fist as he tries to punch you, you flipped him like he weighed nothing. Steve’s eyes nearly bugged out of his eye sockets, his trousers started to strain.

He’s never been more grateful holding a stack of paperwork as he was right now, in his life.

As soon as the class was dismissed he rushed out of the room to go to his, pleasuring himself to the image of you that had ingrained its self into his brain.

“I’ve talked to Fury about bringing L/n on our next mission, he said I have to talk to you. So here goes, Steve I want to bring Agent L/n on our next mission. She’s great, amazing really. Top of her class and she’s a fast learn-“

“Buck slow down jerk, if she has your approval then you’ve got mine. But I wa-was thinking what about Y/n? She was great in the ring against that Donny kid”

Bucky tried his absolute hardest not to laugh or smirk at his friend “Yeah I mean she’s great and all but not like L/n”

“No that’s fine, bring Agent L/n on board but you stick with her the whole time okay” Steve tried not to let his disappointment known, he would of liked to of seen Y/n again - even talk to her would be amazing for him.

“Cheers pal you won’t regret this”

As the door closes behind Bucky, Steve slumped into his chair and sulked.

Their next mission came a week later and it was pretty simple; get in, arrest the bad guys, download information, get out. Easy.

Steve and the team was already on the quinjet and was just waiting for Bucky and L/n to arrive, him and Nat were talking about a film they all watched the night before, when he heard two sets of footsteps coming closer.

“Sorry we��re late, I had to sign off some more paperwork for this one, everyone this is L/n and L/n this is everyone” Bucky says.

“Terminator you really need to work on your introductions, I’m Sam it’s a pleasure to meet you”

“Hi Sam I’m-“

“That’s Nat, Tony, Wanda and Steve” Bucky cuts you off.

“I’m Y/n, it’s so great to meet all of you” That. That has Steve lifting his head, his brain short circuiting for a moment before his eyes went directly to Bucky who stood there with a smirk on his face.

“Aren’t you going to say ‘ooh it’s an absolute honour to be working you The Avengers, it’s a dream come true’?” Tony asked in a mocking tone which caused Steve to snap his eyes away from Bucky to the Billionaire.

“No” Your laugh caused him to smile lightly “That would be a lie well the second part anyway, my dream was to always be a fairy princess but-“ waving your arms out “that appears not to of come true.” Everyone laughed as Tony smirked and clicked his fingers.

“I like her, welcome aboard the crazy express”

“Thank you, Mr Stark”

“Tony, call me Tony sweetheart”

Steve didn’t know which one to kill first Bucky or Tony. Both as bad as each other really.

With the introductions out of the way and the mission briefing just finished, Steve pulled Bucky to the back of the quinjet.

“You didn’t tell me that L/n was actually Y/n!”

“Yeah, L/n is Y/n’s last name Stevie”

“Don’t try and be funny Buck! She sticks with me throughout the mission”

“But you said for her to stick with me…”

“I know what I said but I’ve changed my mind”

“Why?”

“Be-because…I’m Captain America” Smiling and raising his eyebrows at his friend.

“That’s true - oh just before I leave, you know tonight when we get home? Make sure you get FRIDAY to soundproof your room so I don’t have to hear you moaning out Y/n’s name again like the other week”. It was now Bucky’s turn to smile as Steve’s face went bright red.

“H-how?”

“Remember Captain America I’m just like you” Tapping his ears before walking off.

Steve bows his head and mumbles “Shit”.

Days after the mission Steve was walking down the corridor with you occupying his thoughts when he bumps into a person-

“I’m so sorry” The voice he’s committed to memory says.

“It’s okay, are you alright?”

“I’m fine, I wasn’t looking where I was going-I’m really sorry”

“It’s fine honestly. I’m glad I bumped into you actually, I’ve spoken with Fury about making you a part of the team, and he’s agreed”

“Wait thee team?”

“You’ll be a member of the Avengers”

“Oh my God thank you!” You jump into his arms throwing your arms around his neck hugging him.

He holds you tightly, breathing in the scent of your soft hair. Loving the feel of your weight in his arms and before he knew it you was pulling away and jumping down.

“I’m so sorry! I-that was so inappropriate and unprofessional, I’m so sorry Mr Rog-“

“It’s fine! I promise it’s okay, and it’s Steve I told you this”

“Still I’m sorry”

He hates the look in your eyes, he knew that he would happily hold you in his arms for a lifetime if given the chance.

It’s been a few months now since you joined the team, everyone welcomed you with open arms. Nat and Wanda loved that there was now another woman on the team. They both became your best friends instantly.

You became close to everyone especially Steve, if you two weren’t next to each other you’d be texting. And since he was always up before you he would always make you breakfast in bed after he came back from his run. Every Friday you would make him his favourite meal that is mom use to make, it took you about five tries before you perfected it not that Steve ever complained.

You developed feelings for the super solider early on, you didn’t mean to per say, it was his own fault for being perfect, and beautiful, kind, understanding even when he had no idea what you was talking about, did you say beautiful? Oh and he had an incredible arse. So really it wasn’t your fault, but his.

It was Saturday night, you and the girls were watching rom-coms in the common room when you heard Steve and Bucky talking.

“It’s just three simple words Stevie, tell her”

“It’s not that easy jerk, what if I scare her away and she never wants to talk to me again”

“You’ll never know unless you try, just tell her you like her, easy”.

Your heart sank into your stomach.

You knew you weren’t going to be that lucky woman who he confesses he likes but a girl can dream.

Despite the pain you’ll go through seeing him with another girl, you’ll be happy for him.

When he walked past the common room he saw you, Nat and Wanda watching a movie. Wanda was throwing popcorn at you as you tried to catch them in your mouth.

Bucky nudged him, mouthing ‘do it’. He didn’t even think about what he was going to say to you other than the truth.

“Go away, this is girls night” Wanda says as she sees the pair coming into the room.

“It took us half an hour to get rid of Sam so please just leave or we’ll result to violence” Nat speaks.

“I just need to say something to Y/n then we’ll be out of your hair ladies” Steve says as his eyes are trained on you.

“Sure what’s up?”

“I love you”

The silence was deafening.

“What?”

“I love you. Pretty much from when I heard you laughing when you were training with Bucky’s class”

“Is this a prank?”

“No. Why would you thin-“

“I love you too”

Steve stood there with a shy smile on his face “Re-really?”

“Yes Steve I love you too”

“Good, good. Okay bye”. All four of them sit there and watched as Steve walked out of the room and down the corridor.

“Did he just…”

“Yep”

Bucky laughs, says his goodbyes to the women and follows his best friend.

~ banner credit goes to @sweetpeapod ~

Tags: @imcinnamoons | @pigeonmama | @capsbestgirl77

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nkhrdstyvskrrtskrrt · 3 months

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📎 YOSANO AKIKO ANALYSIS

UNDERSTANDING & ANALYZING BUNGOU STRAY DOGS YOSANO THROUGH THE LENSES OF THE REAL YOSANO AKIKO'S LIFE

WC. 4,000

DISCLAIMER: I am no historian or literary expert I am just obsessed and mentally unwell, if u cannot tell, teehee <333 If this will ignite any hate or hostility (not this post’s intention), please set your sights elsewhere and just scroll. I made this because I love her character and BSD in general to a bone-shattering degree. I hope you have as much fun as I did while researching and writing this, enjoy!! (also English is not my first language forgive me for any grammatical errors ty)

There might be a part two for this, but for now, this is all my tiny brain could offer >:))

IMPORTANT NOTE: There will be a lot of omitted, summarized information that has been subjectively extracted or abridged. This is not a complete, rich historical account but research done to make connections and parallels to better understand and theorize about BSD Yosano’s character. I did not finish reading the entire biography, which is why this is only the first section of a bigger whole.

However, if you desire to dig deeper about her in an unabridged manner please kindly refer to the source I will list below. One last thing, please don’t hesitate to add your own thoughts, I am encouraging you to do so, I will appreciate it so much actually!

My primary source;; Janine Beichman - Embracing the Firebird_ Yosano Akiko and the Birth of the Female Voice in Modern Japanese Poetry-University of Hawaii Press (2002). [pdf can be downloaded for free @/libgen]

Allow me to initiate this observation with a passage directly extracted from her biography (the one named above):

“Yosano’s father Òtori Sòshichi (1847–1903), was the second-generation owner of the Surugaya, a well-known confectioner that specialized in yòkan (sweet bean paste) and sweet dumplings.”

With this passage in mind, I’d like to remind you of this scene in the manga that hinted at BSD Yosano’s circumstances and background prior to being selected as Mori’s assistant at the fortress. In this panel, she mentioned that she was tending to a candy store before getting drafted.

Now, drawing from the passage we read regarding the real Yosano Akiko and applying this to BSD Yosano—it’s not far-fetched to assume that the candy shop she was tending to was run and owned by her family. Normally, we could say that familial separation, especially at such an early stage of childhood would be quite hard on the child. However, if we consider the following facts from the real Yosano Akiko’s childhood and parallel it to BSD Yosano again, we could conclude that the separation wasn’t as difficult nor emotional for her when Mori selected her, because she was called in this book an ‘infant exile.’

Starting from the very birth of the real Yosano, her father was severely appalled by her because she was a girl. Moreover, he deserted their home for a week without even looking at his daughter’s face. Her mother became distressed because of the week-long absence of her father, (fainted, even) and couldn’t breastfeed her properly, resulting in the infant Yosano being sent to a maternal aunt accompanied by a wet nurse.

Two years later, due to convenience rather than the will to come back, Yosano returned to her familial house because her aunt had a new baby of her own to look after and raise. Though at this time, a new baby was born, too, at the Otoris. And this baby grew up to be the brother to whom the adult Yosano dedicated her poem ‘Thou Shalt Not Die.’

Since the arrival of this baby boy, Yosano’s existence has become easier to tolerate—see this actual snapshot from the passage I am referencing:

‘ while at the Òtori home a baby boy had finally arrived, making it easier to tolerate the unwelcome girl.’

As if to rub in the author’s title for the real Yosano Akiko (infant exile) even their servants and relatives had a distaste for her and her personality, viewing her as the ‘difficult’ child in the family. Here’s another direct quote from the biography book:

‘The relatives chimed in disapprovingly: “‘The younger brother is better behaved; his older sister is a little much.’ From the apprentices to the little uncle on my mother’s side all predicted better things for my younger brother than for me. Having to listen to all that didn’t feel very good.” Even the servants rubbed it in.’

Additionally, Yosano Akiko herself wrote that she never knew the warmth of a mother or father’s lap and that her parents had an inherent antipathy towards her that was not inflicted on her siblings. She wrote, that other women are troubled concerning their in-laws, and how to operate as human beings alongside them but this same worry is her very reality in her own family’s household—blood and flesh—she served her parents as if they were her in-laws and endured hardships by their hand and in their name. Here’s a snippet from the biography:

‘“Other women become brides and struggle to manage a household, but for me it was the reverse: from the time I was a young girl I served my parents as if they were my in-laws, and endured emotional and physical hardships.”’

Another possible factor that enriched an equal sentiment of apathy within Yosano was despite the extremely young age of three she was coerced into attending school—which, as made clear in the biography, was something she disliked. What gave her parents this idea? Well, her father was quite the ardent enthusiast of the science of producing superior human beings. With this belief in mind, it’s no surprise that when he mistook the large forehead of the young Yosano as a sign of intelligence, he sent her to study immediately.

But Yosano was too young, too passionate, and excited still to engage in play with other children, to have fun with her friends because she was hardly above infancy, only three years old. Despite the awareness of the adults around her that she’s not of school age yet, she was shamed for her disagreement—as said to her by one of her maids: “See what a good girl Miss Takenaka is. Aren’t you ashamed of skipping school?”

Are you seeing a parallel? BSD Yosano, although just 11 years old, was chosen by Mori to be the core of his immortal regiment plan, because similar to the real Yosano’s situation somebody (her father) saw something urgent and, perhaps special or advantageous in her which is why she was pushed into studying—in BSD Yosano’s case Mori saw this potential within her and incorporated her into his plans, and drafted her from what seems to be her family’s candy shop.

One thing I’d like to emphasize again is that in this drafting of BSD Yosano, the fact that she agreed or at the very least went along with Mori even if it meant being separated from her family, is because she (if we parallel it once again to the poet Yosano) was never really seen as important or someone capable in her family, they did not have faith in what she can do or her future, they did not have confidence in her character. Regarding this sentiment here are two excerpts from the biography:

‘The restrictions themselves (which were not uncommon then, at least in Sakai) did not hurt as much as the misjudgment of her character and what she might do were she free: “It goes without saying that in a house with many employees, and particularly in a morally lax city like Sakai, a daughter had to be strictly supervised. But there was no need to go that far with a woman who took as many pains to protect herself as I did. I thought the lack of understanding of my feelings that my parents’ attitude showed was outrageous and when alone I often wept over it.”’

And:

‘Like her parents, the teacher hurt her pride by assuming that she was less intellectually and morally advanced than she actually was, but politeness kept her from objecting.

And as stated by the creature in Frankenstein (see how I always find a way to mention it haha): “And tell me why I should pity man more than he pities me?”

Why should she nurture deep affection for her family—relatives and servants too, even her teacher—when they will not reciprocate even a pittance of the same love and care? Or even respect. Take a look at this paragraph from the document:

‘But the results of this parental coldness were not entirely negative. Just as

ignorance of her ancestry liberated Akiko from the weight of family tradition,

so multiple caretakers and the lack of parental affection weakened her sense of

filial obligation.

‘What gave her the strength to defy her family’s expectations

and flee to Tokyo in her early twenties? Surely, the intensity of her love for

Yosano Tekkan and her own literary ambition were most important; but would

a more cherished daughter have been able to make the break so decisively? The

seeds of the later revolt were planted in the infant exile.’

For this very reason, I conclude that if anything, being drafted by Mori was, in the 11-year-old Yosano’s eyes, an opportunity to prove her competence and worth and realize her goal—saving people’s lives (although in this, she has been failed). As a matter of fact there is a compelling possibility that this conviction to save lives was another element of the real Yosano’s personality and beliefs. It has been written in the biography that Yosano Akiko’s father was a fan of stories of heroism, stories that involved the act of protecting and saving, and what makes this relevant is that he also loved sharing these stories with his children.

From a young age, her mind was fed with these noble stories, and children are impressionable. That said, the young Yosano Akiko inherently possessed a special empathy and protectiveness over life, in support of this let us read through another snippet from a passage;

‘One summer when Akiko was around eight she was sitting up there in the evening cool with her siblings and some cousins, when one of the older children remarked, “A night when the moon and the stars are close means fire.” When the others had left, Akiko gazed up at the vastness of the sky. Feeling sorry for the children in any house that might burn and worried that the fire might reach her own house, “I tried to think of some way to increase the distance between the little star and the moon.”’

As additional support, kindly read this excerpt as well:

‘In the morning, Akiko’s parents returned from her sister’s house. As their own manager politely expressed his relief that the Takemura home was unharmed, Akiko thought sadly to herself, “I wouldn’t mind having the Take-muras’ storehouse burn down if only the Gusei girl had not turned into a charred corpse.”’

And the last addition to further highlight this:

‘So much in this story of the great Sakai fire is typical of Akiko’s view of the society in which she grew up. She shows us all the negatives of the situation: People turned out in force either because they wanted to keep the fire from spreading to their own houses or because they enjoyed a good disaster as long as it was someone else’s. Even her own family thought it natural to rejoice that their daughter’s storehouse had been spared rather than grieve for the dead Gusei girl.’

The young poet Yosano Akiko, even compared to the adults in her environment bore within her a deeper reverence for life, the actions of the adults and their selfish concerns did not amuse her, she thought very negatively of them. The grief and pity she felt for the single casualty, the girl, meant that the loss of life be it a loss of what people consider an insignificant person, mattered to her. For her, every death is worth grieving. And should never be a source of entertainment or material for gossip (the villagers made festivals and dances inspired by the incident). Taking all this into account, it’s not much of a shock that BSD Yosano was so driven to save lives, why it mattered to her so strongly, why, she was also so severely devastated about what her ability has been used for.

A brief interlude before further digging into the real poet’s early history, I’d like to draw more emphasis on the previous points made—specifically how she’d rather have the storehouse burn (despite having a mother who’s from a lineage of merchants, and Yosano running the candy shop business as well) if it meant seeing a girl she didn’t know too deeply, live—leaping to the future, the poet’s adulthood, for a moment, to affirm further BSD Yosano’s principles regarding the preciousness of life above all else.

In her most, as called in one article, ‘inflammatory’ poem which is ‘Thou Shalt Not Die’ I want us to focus on this particular line in the poem:

For you, what does it matter if Port Arthur Fortress falls or not?

The poet Yosano Akiko was so adamant in stopping her brother, Port Arthur be damned, because it was common knowledge at that time, false or not, that serving the military was volunteering for your own death—there were rumors of the Japanese soldiers being sent to suicide missions—and for what cause, even? Well, that’s not the right question to ask, let’s correct it to what 11-year-old BSD Yosano expressed in her refusal against Mori’s command to continue healing: Should any cause matter over human life?

Remember, she disagreed when he (Tachihara’s brother) told her that her ability could change the world. She hoped only to save those she could reach. She was aware, of her limits, of the consequences, and that she could not and should not aim for such causes.

Alright, now that we can clearly see how the real Yosano Akiko’s qualities reflect onto BSD Yosano. Back to the early past.

As young as eight, Yosano Akiko tended and shouldered a huge portion of their business’s management, because, as said in the biography her mother was “sickly” while her father was “irresponsible” so she felt that she had to shoulder their responsibilities, here’s a direct quote: ‘ So Akiko felt that she “absolutely had to” stay home and help her parents, managing both the store and the household.’

But because of this, she earned a position of authority in the household, (additionally, by the age of eighteen, she has salvaged the losses from her father’s stock investments.) analogous to—as she stated herself—how a servant acting on behalf of the master can carve out his or her own sphere of autonomy.

Our Yosano, if we again, try to see her in the real author’s light, must have been reminded of the corner she was driven into in her younger years. Reminded, of how the adults around her could so easily burden her with duties disproportionate to her age and how powerless she was after all amidst all of it.

This time though, she had hope; hope that she could start anew and could finally leave behind a life riddled with mistrust, and belittling, that she could choose for herself what she would labor for and dedicate her efforts to.

That—in the absence of her hometown and the people she grew with, the absence too, of admiration and belonging would change.

For a brief moment, it did.

The soldiers adored her, praised her as an angel, and treated her as someone capable—one made her good coffee, drew her a portrait, and Tachihara’s brother even created a present for her with his ability. She was needed not as some fallback for responsibilities nobody wanted. She was necessary, in a way she approved of. She was not a better-than-nothing exile anymore.

Furthermore, quiet acceptance didn't shackle her speech and response to the adults surrounding her in the fortress. The author, Yosano Akiko during her time running the business, often had to put on a polite face and way of speaking to the customers and called out herself when she seemed childish; moreover, she had to endure the incredulity of the prominent figures in her life, and deal with its damages internally. Take this excerpt, for example:

‘Like her parents, the teacher hurt her pride by assuming that she was less intellectually and morally advanced than she actually was, but politeness kept her from objecting. Among her friends, Akiko could be open about her ambition and her pride, but with adults, she apparently felt she had to choose between a pained silence and outward disrespect, and the latter was impossible for her.’

Meanwhile, in the fortress, she could allow herself to be less restrictive with how she interacts with them.

Even with Mori, her superior, she let go of the hesitation to speak her mind. It’s no surprise then, that by the end of it, her spirit was broken.

This opportunity for change—to make a change, meant the entire world to her. At last, she was able to help in the way that matters to her and appeals to her heart, she did not choose to be there because there were no other options. She was there for a purpose she believed in. Her service was met with gratitude, they accepted her presence, not simply tolerated it.

Until things went south.

And it did in ways that reignited the severity of an existing fear within our Yosano. How, and why is this the case?

The poet, until about fifteen years old, nurtured within her as she wrote, an ‘irrational anxiety about death,’ which ‘shaped her inner life.’ As if to fuel her unease, rumors circulated in Sakai (her hometown) about a certain family’s daughter who died bathed in blood after suffering for three days straight. This rumor made the young Yosano Akiko weep, imagining such a kind of suffering. And with these thoughts haunting her, she came up with a specific way in which she would accept death:

‘“If I am to die, let it be at night, so no one will see. I don’t want my suffering exposed to the light of day. I want to breathe my last alone at night in a dark room, letting death’s cruel hands claim me with lips firmly sealed, not a hair of my

head out of place.”’

She even contemplated suicide, since it is the only way for her to die on her own terms.

Oftentimes, though, she’d take what she could to stay distracted from her mortality, which is mostly done by reading:

‘So here, in addition to the intellectual curiosity, the pleasure, and the inner

rebellion that motivated Akiko’s early reading, is another motive: escape from

anxiety about her own mortality.’

She attempted to pacify her thoughts and emotions about death, through religion. However, despite her consideration, she ended up rejecting it. From the age of three or four, she hated the scent of incense being burned, going as far as to rush past the many temples that burned them. She disliked, too, sitting beside her parents with her hands clasped in prayer. Affirming and elaborating more on this, allow me to show you this passage:

‘The Buddhist teachings and legends they told her seemed no more than “fairytales for grownups” that could be of no help to her in “preparing for death.”

Once she “asked if Gautama Buddha had really existed and, if so, what country he had been a citizen of ” and was told that she “would receive divine retribution” for her impertinence.

Every month her mother and her friends heard a lecture by a priest, but as soon as

the lecture was over, the priest would join them in “ordinary gossip, speaking ill of people behind their backs.”

Akiko “realized that these believers were not even one-tenth as serious as I was about... life and death and that even after twenty or thirty years of visiting temples and praying they were still not saved.” If they had no hope, she reasoned, how much less had she. And so she

concluded that it was “useless” for her “to expect to be helped by Jòdo Shin-

shû.”’

What did encapture her, and attract her (as said in the biography) then?

Alongside the stories of heroic virgins in Japanese myths, she too was moved by Sokkyò Shijin which was the Japanese translation of The Improviser, translated by—guess who? Ougai Mori. Yes, him. Now I want you to witness this excerpt from the biography:

‘“I envied the pure, noble life of virgin empresses like the goddess Amaterasu. The imperial virgins of Ise and Kamo also filled me with longing. When I look back now on how I felt then, I think that, while squarely facing reality, I flew off and thought of my future in beautiful, idealistic terms, and wanted to stay a pure, undefiled virgin, like an angel, all my life.”’

Considering the new information, we can once again connect it to our Yosano and conclude that BSD Yosano also shared the poet’s fear of death and mortality. Besides her disconnect with her family, she wanted to prevent others from experiencing the fear of dying in a gruesome and undignified manner, which is why she allowed herself to be drafted for war. If you’ll allow me to speculate further, I’d say dying for her (at least she believed) should be a choice, or at the very least should be aligned with the personal preferences and ideals of the person dying—and this principle of hers, augmented the horror she has felt and has bestowed upon the soldiers because what exactly did the weaponizing of her ability bereave the soldiers of, exactly? The control they have over their own death.

She wanted to save them from death, and she did. Until they didn't want to—until, she didn't want to, anymore. But she, a child, never stood a chance against what she was actually there for. She was there as a tool to convey a new age of weaponry which were abilities.

The scene with Kaji must have allowed these memories to resurface, he called the train bombing incident an experiment, and in a sense she too was an experiment—like the soldiers, she was there to further the idea and be the evidence that abilities were the weapons of the future that will completely change the battlefield, without any guarantee that she or the soldiers would achieve success, or leave intact.

And they didn’t—not them, not her.

For now, this is all I have for our Yosano.

Or is it? Before we end this I’d like to speculate even more about the significance of Mori as a figure in our Yosano’s life—the poet was moved, her heart attached to the real Mori’s use of language in his translation, in how he wrote the nun—perhaps, BSD Yosano put an equal amount of trust and faith in Mori, his intentions, his treatment of her. Given the real Yosano’s experiences and applying the same to our Yosano, she has every reason to be distrustful and skeptical of suddenly being drafted out of all the older, more experienced people by another adult. So there must be something about BSD Mori’s language, too, that persuaded her and moved her the same way the real Yosano was affected by it. For the first time she believed—relied on him, despite experiencing so many disheartening memories dealt to her by older figures in her life.

Okay, I’m serious now, this is the end. I hope you enjoyed and most of all I hope you appreciate her more as a character, that would be the greatest achievement this post could make.

my main is @ice-devourer jic u wanna talk more abt this, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING OMG!

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd analysis #bungou stray dogs analysis #yosano analysis #bsd yosano #bungou stray dogs yosano #mewrites

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xotication · 3 months

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☆,

i’m bored nd tired of videogames so here’s some more of what type of man i think kaneki is..

okay. when you & kaneki first meet, you have to break him into a LOT of things. one time you guys were texting nd he said something funny.. so you keysmashed & poor baby was CONFUSED.

“y/n are you okay..?”

having to explain it to him made the situation all the more funny but awkward at the same damn time. it’s a hassle having to explain gen z things to this man LMAO.

you had him download instagram, tiktok, even snapchat & learning how to use them was such a drag to him.

“why do you like this stuff anyway?” he says but a week later he’s sending you his entire fyp all like “HAGAHAHA BABE THIS IS SO FUNNY” like boyyy.. wasn’t you JUST talking shit?! at one point he even takes it upon himself to upload silly lil vids & they start to go VIRAL. he doesn’t understand why bc half the time he’s just talking about you & explaining diff things he doesn’t understand about girls.

“my girlfriend asks me really dumb questions all the time, i don’t get it.. how does your brain come up with that?? what on earth do you mean by ‘would you still love me if i was a worm’ like what?!” & then there’s just girls in the comments sending thoughts nd prayers for his poor soul.

basically, kaneki becomes a whole different person after dating you for just a couple months. he adapts damn near all your habits nd it’s the most endearing yet hilarious thing ever.

for example: say he’s talking about a girl or boy & you give him a nasty look bc.. why is he talking about OTHER PEOPLE?! eventually when you start having story times that include someone else, he gives you the MEANESSSTTTT side eye ever. it’s insane.

& don’t ever ask him about it either. “why’re you looking at me like that?”

“idk, why’re you conversing with people who aren’t me?”

“ken, i have to socializ-”

“says who?!”

not only that, but kaneki is airheaded when it comes to people. like if the man doesn’t like someone or something. it shows all over his face.

one time you guys were out eating, & he thought the waiter was being a lil too friendly.. manz was making the most uncomfy faces ever. 😭

“ken- fix your face?!”

“i’m sorry! i’m trying my best.” you guys both whisper yell.

ken gets a house kitty, & when you’re not home, he makes one of those, “gf isn’t home.. yk what that means.. OPTIMUS PRIME ON THE COUNTER” tiktok’s & thinks it’s so funny.

also, when you’re not home, this poor manchild is so bored.

he could read books upon books in a day & still be dying. it’s not until he hears that front door unlock that he feels freed from the shackles that are his boredom!

ken loves to annoy you, he loves to be around you, he loves to look at you, to touch you, any & everything to do with you- he loves.

not to mention.. he begs you to build legos with him. when you agreed, he made it a whole little picnic date & made sure that the weather would be perfect… he also made you swear to not leave the park until the whole lego set was completed.

kennie baby is soso cuteness.

posting my drafts cuz my brain doesn’t wanna work nowadays. 😫😫😫

#anime #fanfic #kaneki x reader #manga #tokyo ghoul #kaneki ken #headcannons #fluff #tokyo ghoul re #xoti speaks!#xoti writes

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sincerely-sofie · 9 months

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Seeing as you have finished writing the script for your AU thingy, I wanna know, how?

Like, were you motivated the whole time? Or was it a on and off writing type thing?

i'm trying to write but I don't know if I have the motivation...

How did you keep the motivation if so?

Oh man. I have so much to say about writing and creativity that I could make an entire series of posts talking about the subject, but I'll try to keep things orderly and brief.

Disclaimer: I should let you know that I have never finished a writing project before recently finishing my TPiaG AU. Keep that in mind when reading the advice I offer— the tips I give have only been put into work in my own life over the course of the last couple of months, but they’ve proven very effective in my experience!

Sofie Creativity Tips Episode 1, go!!!

Was I motivated the whole time I was writing TPiaG / How did I stay motivated?

Absolutely not. If I hadn’t provided myself a detailed chapter-by-chapter outline for TPiaG before starting the writing process, I would have given up thanks to a mix of writer’s block and absent motivation. Motivation is a fickle muse and prone to ditching me for months on end, so I’ve adapted by trying not to rely on it, but also by creating new motivation rather than clinging to past motivation. I create motivation for myself in two ways: removing friction when writing and being my own fandom.

Removing friction is pretty simple— I create very detailed chapter outlines that remove any fear of writer’s block, set up my devices in a way to make it easy to access my manuscripts and notes, download premade writing playlists that have Pomodoro session break timers built into them, and more. Anything that makes the writing process easier to get into and enjoy doing, I make sure to incorporate into my life.

Being my own fandom is less intuitive, but a thousand times more rewarding in terms of motivation. I make memes of my characters. I write self-indulgent snippets on the side. I make AUs of my own work. I make playlists and save audio clips that suit the characters. I draw comics exploring concepts that might not get into the manuscript itself but that I want to make content for regardless. Basically, I dive in deep into the story, characters, and world, and try to do so with the enthusiasm that I give other people’s projects.

(That part is extra fun, because if I have a headcanon, it automatically becomes canon to whatever AU or original project I’m working on. I have all the power in the world when working like this, and it’s very fun.)

What changed and made it so I finished my first ever written project?

This isn’t exactly what was asked, but because I have eschewed motivation as the main driving force in my writing process, I figured I’d give another insight into how TPiaG went against the pattern of half-started and swiftly abandoned projects that came before it and actually got finished. Late into October, I adopted a new method of producing first drafts. Previously, I would spend weeks polishing the same chapter and would only move on to the next chapter once the current one was perfect. My new method is the complete opposite. I’ve started calling it Writing BFF:

Write bad

Write fast

Write fun

First up, write bad. The point of this is not to waste your time writing prettily during your first draft. Don’t bother agonizing over how to reword that one sentence to be more elegant when it does the job well enough to get its point across. Don’t go off on a 30-minute research tangent in the middle of a writing session because you want to fact-check that one detail and make sure it’s perfectly accurate when you could just put a placeholder detail in brackets and CTRL+F search and plug in something accurate later on. Don’t write pretty, write bad. And be okay with it. You can’t edit an empty page, so fill the page with as much garbage as possible so that you can turn it into gold later on.

Next, write fast. This is only effective when paired with writing bad. Don’t pause, don’t hesitate, don’t deliberate. Write as much as you can and do it as fast as you can. This idea is best illustrated by Chris Fox’s book 5,000 Words Per Hour, where he talks about increasing your WPM (words per minute) and how it makes everything about your writing better. The person who creates a beautiful first draft once every three years is doing okay, but the person who cranks out a complete manuscript every three months learns leagues more about writing than the first person does by the end of three years. The second person has practiced outlining, drafting, editing, publishing, and more with every manuscript completed. The faster you write, the better you get, because practice makes perfect and quantity begets quality.

Finally, write fun. I write what I enjoy, and if I’m not enjoying it, I pivot the project so that I enjoy it again. I like writing deeply personal stories, so pretty much everything I write is heavily based on my life and experiences— TPiaG included. Grovyle’s portrayal is deeply influenced by my experience being an elder sibling who has been a bad example of self-talk, and cleaned up my act because my younger sister started echoing how I spoke to myself. Dusknoir’s portrayal is informed by my experiences with being the therapist / mom friend in different social circles as well as attending actual formal therapy. Twig is the character that my experiences have the greatest influence on in her portrayal, and I joke about her being a self-insert, but ultimately all of the characters are self-inserts to some extent. I also enjoy low-stakes and slow slice-of-life stories that are driven by character growth. If I ever stop having fun with a project, I inject more of myself and my preferences into my work to get it back into my favor.

TL;DR / Writing advice lightning round

Write as badly as possible as quickly as possible, and have fun as you do it. Momentum yields motivation and stagnancy yields doubt. Editing comes only after the first draft is complete. Be your own fandom and your project’s biggest fan. Give yourself direction and ward against writer’s block by making detailed chapter-by-chapter outlines. Make the writing process as easy and enjoyable as possible. Motivation is a lie and if you chase after it instead of making your own, you’ll be writing on hard mode for the rest of your life. Reject perfectionism, embrace flawesomeness.

If I didn’t answer your question right, let me know! I’ll do my best to correct it.

#creativity tips with sofie #sofie answers asks #sofie says stuff #writing #writing advice #writing tips #writing motivation #writer advice #writer tips #writers on tumblr #writerscommunity #writers of tumblr

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minecraftnewsnetwork · 1 year

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If anyone wants to join MCNN for the looming 5th Life season, hit us up at @minecraftnewsnetwork

In light of recent cryptic Grian-posting, it looks like this series will happen sooner than expected!

We can always use more help with:

Administration and project management

Taking notes

Writing scripts

Recording in-game reports

Downloading clips

Creating art/ visual assets

Editing video

Even if you can only do some of those, or one of those, all help is good help! Our main requests are that you be up front about what you can do, and let us know as soon as possible if your availability changes.

Our account here at @minecraftnewsnetwork is a shared account between Lead Reporters @pixiemage, @the-joju-experience, @fearforthestorm, and @salemoleander. Feel free to send an Ask directly to the main MCNN account for Discord details, or Message any of us on our personal accounts if you have questions.

Please note: We cannot guarantee that we will accept everyone who requests to join - we could get 2 requests or 200, and at some point that's too many cooks in the kitchen. Requests will largely be first-come, first-served, with some exceptions/prioritization made for those with video recording and editing experience.

FAQs

What the heck is MCNN?

A fan-created, scripted video series that seeks to summarize and report on the events that occurred across every POV in the Life Series that week. We started with Limited Life, and now I guess it's time for our second rodeo. This is our YouTube channel.

Do I have to have experience in [Video Editing]/[Script Writing]/etc to sign up for it?

Not at all! Everyone is welcome to sign up for whatever roles they want to do. We do like to aim for a certain level of quality in what we make, so if you aren't very far along in your creative journey with that medium please make sure you're prepared to receive peer feedback and edit suggestions!

I'm a minor! Can I help?

We do allow people under 18 to help, yes! Limiting who gets to help on a fan project about a ~PG video series seems nonsensical; especially when many of the adults in MCNN got their Minecraft start well before they turned 18, and it sparked a longstanding creative interest. However: School, family, and your overall wellbeing come first. If at any time the project seems to be conflicting with those priorities, you will be asked to step back for the remainder of the season.

What applications/tools do you use?

We use Google Sheets to write timecoded video notes, Google Docs to draft and work together on scripts, a mixture of ReplayMod and OBS to record in-game reports, and DaVinci Resolve to edit video. All of these tools are free to use, and we are able to walk through settings and basics with you if you're unfamiliar with any of these.

Do you make money from this? What do I get from helping?

\We are not monetized, and have no intention of monetizing or turning on ads. This is a fan-created show, made for the love of creation and celebrating a series we like. We are all unpaid interns, here at MCNN. :D That said - this is a 2+ month project involving project management, editing, writing, and other real-world technical & professional skills. If you participate and want help adding this to your resume, or need a letter of recommendation for a job or school organization/event, we are happy to assist with that!

#traffic life smp #life smp #life series #trafficblr #traffic series #mcnn #minecraftnewsnetwork #minecraft news network #hello. please come help!#reporter salem

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crescencestudio · 1 year

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Devlog #33 | 07.26.23

Hi everyone!

It's only been a month (per usual) since the last devlog. But it feels like so long ago! Very weird that last devlog I hadn't even released Intertwine yet. But here we are, back with another one!

Before we get into things, I want to extend the biggest thank you to everyone who has played and supported intertwine!

if you havent played yet, here it is. this is me on my knees asking because i am quite proud of it and what our team accomplished in two months!

in the almost month it's been out, we stand at almost 15k total plays and 200+ reviews which is so crazy to me. i never would've expected that kind of reception for our little game and when i say it has been so motivating for alaris!!! u dont even know!!!

thank you again for all the kind words---i know you are all Sick of me talking about it but i don't know how else to express my gratitude <3 it means so much to me ;_;

I wanted to make sure I inserted an official section for it in the Devlog just to really thank you all for the support. But with that, I shall get into the updates!

But not before a quick belated happy birthday to Fenir!

Writing

I posted it earlier this week, but I HAVE!!! THE MOST EXCITING NEWS!!! At least for me.

I FINISHED DRUK'S FIRST DRAFT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We all know how long this has been in the making. I've been talking about his route for what feels like an eternity. Evidently, it's Very Normal to experience burnout, struggles with motivation, creative ruts, etc. etc. at this point in development. The initial and final stages of development are easier because your motivation is up. In the beginning, it's like Wow!! This is Fun!! And towards the end, it's like Wow!!! I actually Fckn Made It!!!!

And so the middle part of development, aka the stage I just entered with Druk's route, is the slog.

Now that I've overcome that initial hurdle, while I'm not near the end of development, I do feel like I will have a better handle of progress on the following routes since I have a better set of expectations and tools on how to get through this stage (compared to when I initially started Druk's route, and I was like what are all these Feelings?? Why am I Struggling so much??).

That being said, WE ARE OVER HALFWAY DONE WITH THE SCRIPT! It currently stands at 200k words including the demo, and with how each of the routes have been shaping up, we have about 150k left to go. Wow!!!!! It is crazy to know I've written that much for Alaris, and this feels like such an exciting milestone to know that I'm over halfway there for the script!

We also have just about wrapped up Fenir's developmental edits, so that makes Kayn and Fenir's foundational versions of their routes done (all that would be left at this point is line tweaking and/or revisions based on beta feedback)!! Overall, this was a really exciting month for writing updates, and I'm so happy to feel back on track with Alaris development <3 I also finished my dissertation proposal in case anyone is keeping track of that HEEHOO

Art

Most of my attention for art was (un?)fortunately on Intertwine this month AGAIN. I really had anticipated being able to dive right into Alaris and irl work this month after Otojam ended. But the reception to Intertwine made it so I needed to dedicate some time to "marketing" artwork aka the artwork I like to make when reaching certain milestones of support (e.g., 1k downloads, etc.). Obviously these aren't necessary, but I like to show my thanks and appreciation in some way, and the artwork is what feels best conveys my gratitude.

Because we hit milestones relatively quickly, I ended up having to make those pieces faster than I anticipated prior to release. So I spent the first half of this month mostly on intertwine "promotional/apprecation" artwork. Near the tail end of this month though, I've prioritized Alaris artwork and have made progress on both the Kickstarter physical rewards and some CG sketches!

sneaky peeky of pretty mermay Aisa

Vui continues to hit it out of the park with the backgrounds. Most of them are spoilers at this point. But I do have one that isn't too bad of a spoiler! And because you all have been so supportive and patient with me, I show hehe

vui and his bg mastery: a preview of the dragon springs

The demo mentions dragon springs (I..... think......... LMAO), and here is a preview of what those dragon springs can look like. Wonder what the context will be in which we visit them, teehee! I'm in love with the way Vui brings the fantasy world of Alaris to life. I am so grateful for him ^^

Market Research

My wrist was feeling ~delicate~ this month due to Otojam crunch and then post-release pieces. So I don't have any actual art pieces to showcase this month for market research. I did play Otojam games and started Cupid Parasite (ryuki and allan my beloveds). But crescence's wrist needs to relax LOL. So no art pieces more than necessary for this month!

I will send some love to my besties over at Ravenstar Games though! If you haven't heard, they have a game currently in development called Lost in Limbo. It looks sick as hell, and the team is unbelievable talented and hardworking. This month to celebrate Barbie, they were able to sneak this promotional piece in, even while working on their Master's ((Do you see...... a familiar group of people..... heh))

Alaris x Lost in Limbo x Barbie the collaboration of the century

That's all from me for now. Thank you again for all the support and love on Intertwine! I've truly cherished all the fanwork, reviews, kind messages, etc.

That being said, while it was a bit of a struggle getting back returning to the Alaris world initially (I was literally like what.... was the plot of this again... LMAOsazodujf), it's been so rewarding to return to my OG gang. The intertwine release and return to Alaris work has also been strangely sentimental since it's reminded me how far I've come in the two years I've been in this dev Thang. As always thank you for your continued support (and for supporting Alaris since it's inception when I was a Wee Dev), and I look forward to bringing you more updates in the future <3

See you all next month, and stay safe!

#devlog #alaris

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i-can-even-burn-salad · 1 year

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Till Death

[ID: The title of the story, till death, written in light green, brush-stroke letters over a photo of a blonde woman in black clothing, walking through a dense forest, facing away from the viewer. All other images are divider lines, showing four small brass bells. End ID]

Her garment covered him like a soft green blanket. It didn’t keep him warm, because there was no warmth to keep, but it made him feel a bit safer. One tiny barrier between his broken body and the teeth of the forest, but perhaps it was enough. Perhaps she was going to stay with him until it was over.

📖 Synopsis

Finnian is a wandering healer down on his luck. When one of his patients dies, the village turns against him, beating him half to death and abandoning him for thirst and scavengers to finish what they started.

Eilis lives deep in the forest, hiding from the world. When she finds him, impaled on a tree and barely alive, she can‘t leave him to his fate, even if it means upending the peaceful life she has built for herself.

As Finnian slowly recovers, days filled with quiet companionship make the prospect of him staying less daunting than either of them had expected. But he carries too many scars, and Eilis too many secrets, threatening to destroy their fragile relationship as the shadows of the past draw closer. When everything falls apart, will they save each other, or will the price be too high?

📖 About

Genre: Dark Fantasy Love Story

POV: Third person past tense, dual POV

Wordcount: 110k

Status: final_final_v2_thisone.doc

Content Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, gore and rape, including, graphic eye/hand trauma, attempted hanging, strong deathwish, insects, animal attacks, torture (whipping, strangulation, cutting, flaying, burns, broken bones), forced to watch, self-sacrifice, abusive marriage & childhood trauma

Vibes: left for dead / falling leaves / “please don’t leave me” / crows on the branches / making fire (the novel) / sweet berries / small touches / “i'm sorry” / the chiming of bells / a stubborn goat / unreliable magic / the smell of honey and milk / “don’t hurt her”

AU: Forsaken - Forgiven - Forever

Custom artwork links below, contain spoilers as well as sketchy violence and gore <3

📖 Cast

Finnian

As a healer who cannot use his magic to heal, Finnian has spent the last fifteen years barely scraping by. He hates his profession, he hates people, and most of all, he hates himself. Unfortunately for him, someone else hates him just as much.

Eilis

Deep inside the forest, in a little hut with only her ducks and goats for company, Eilis is hiding from her past. She can’t trust, she can’t speak — but she also can’t turn the wounded stranger away, even if it means risking her heart.

📖 Tags

There aren’t many, because I have yet to think of a tag for the two protagonists. The only tag I am currently using is #wip: till death, for tag games and ask answers talking about this wip.

I don’t know what genre to call it — it does not quite fit the common cornerstones of Dark Fantasy, or Dark Romance, but oh boy, it definitely is dark.

It won’t be posted on Tumblr, instead arriving directly as ebook, because I am just done dealing with this site.

As of Aug 20th, the first draft is done at 110k words! Now I'll bother my friends, let it rest for a few weeks, then edit it. Fingers crossed!

It's out! Download the ebook here.

#wip: till death #wip intro #writeblr #whump

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megumi-fm · 9 months

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20th - 25th Dec || 145 to 150 of 150dop

this is a late post because I was away from home for the holidays and I didn't really have the time or good enough internet to update you guys, but here we are!!! thank you to everyone who tagged me in cute games during this time (i will be doing them only next year tho hehe) and especially to @chaotic-diaries-of-yours-truely and @winryrockbellwannabe who sent in really comforting asks during this time <3 you guys are my favourites. (I will answer them soon I promise! I've just been swamped 😭)

🎧 Son O-Gong by Seventeen

📋 Tasks

🩺 Radiomics Projects ↳ BCR: draft next year timeline ↳ GBR: download source code and learn mechanism 📝 English Proficiency Test ↳ results are out!!! I did really well, yay!!!

🎨 Personal

I went to my hometown (it's not so much my hometown as it is my native place) and got to meet a lot of family friends and relatives!! It was a lot of fun!! I had a great time!! 📺 Shows this week ↳ My Love Mix-Up JP ✅ ↳ Cherry Magic TH 🔽 (can I just say that I love this adaptation wayyy more than I expected. I really like that it is not trying to be a replica of the JP version and instead focusing on the same themes in a different light) ↳ Last Twilight 🔽 ↳ I also kind of started Trillion Game (meguro ren the man you are)

and we're finally done!! this was my first challenge after setting up my studyblr and I am so happy that I made so many wonderful friends on here who have been checking in on me and supporting me through the course of these 150 days. Even if you're just sharing these posts or liking them, it has really motivated me to do better and keep going. And you guys, who have also been working hard to meet your goals, y'all inspire me day in and day out, I really wouldn't be here if it wasn't for this wonderful studyblr community <3

I initially started this series in july and it was only supposed to be for 100 days, but now, after several days skipped in between, and the 100 days updated to 150, and constantly changing goals, we're finally here. At the end. And despite all the modifications, I've only really met 50% of the goals I set for myself. But that being said, i'm proud of myself for making it through. I tend to struggle with consistency a lot, but I'm happy that I still tried my best to be regular with posting. I'm also happy that I was kind to myself through the duration of these 150 days- that I didn't get too rigid with the structure and I let myself have off days or club several days in a post together. At the end of the day, it wasn't supposed to feel too pressurizing or like a chore, and I think I succeeded in that. I also learnt a lot about planning, and I've also in general come to accept the truth that goal setting is a dynamic process and goals and due dates will change over time and that is okay. So yeah. I felt really challenged throughout this series, but that being said, I'm never doing this again 😭. May next year bring new challenges hehe

37 - 42/final42 // the end.

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dee-the-red-witch · 3 months

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Summer Re-runs

So, time for a content update on some fiction stuff.

For those new to here? Saltbrook was a serialized horror novel that ran on here a few years ago. At the end of the novel, I'd put the whole thing together and started another full year of submitting it to publishers and agents, all of whom didn't have time to read it much less reject it for anything other than sitting in their queues for too long (no objections from here, 2020/2021 was a weird time for publishing since EVERYONE used the pandemic to finish their novels).

And then? Well, I had edits I wanted and needed to make, and it got buried in with the giant backlog of everything else as another pressure to get done. The last two days, however, somehow turned into this sudden burn through finishing the remaining edits and starting the layout passes to set everything up for self-publishing it. So, in about twelve or thirteen weeks, there's a novel getting released.

What does that have to do with here? Well, the first serialized run was the rough rough draft of the book. Things got tightened up a good chunk. And the final chapters never got put up on here. So, I'm adding a treat for everyone with some summer reading- a re-run of the entire book now that it's edited. One chapter a week, every Thursday, with access to everyone subscribed at any membership tier level. Also some other posts with things like the AMAZING cover art done by Terra Bosart, and other bits. When the serialized run finishes, there'll also be a free download of the final version of the e-book made available for all paid subscribers, not just the tier levels. This'll cover about twelve weeks while I'm finishing up the layout work, and hopefully doing some promotional work for it like getting some blurb and preview solicits done.

So yeah, summer re-runs. Some chilling fiction to help beat the heat, set in the remains of a drowned and abandoned town and valley that's packed full of secrets and hauntings. Starting this Thursday.

Now to go queue up a whole BUNCH of posts!

#fiction #saltbrook

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einsatzzz · 3 months

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Ein's Art Log #1

@lixenn!! Here's the timelapse I recorded for my rarepair week submission! I'm just gonna start this log series because I wanna study art more and take notes of it here in this blog. And maybe it will help people with their drawings? I'm putting my notes below ↓↓↓

Draft & Lineart

First, for this art, I used a base made by Ging (깅). Using bases like these are always useful for a lot of things and it also forces me to draw things (like poses, hands, etc) I wouldn't normally draw by myself (if its up to just my hand with zero braincell input, I would just draw the characters facing 3/4 to the left over and over). Also a lot of them are just so *chef kiss*, god bless Korean artists. They're so good, especially with how they do the figures and anatomy!

I just adjusted the base a bit to match the characters' heights, since Kurumi is taller than Chrome by like 6cm.

Then when making the drawing a draft layer over the base, I usually use bright colors like green, red or blue (most often green). I usually don't think about the draft too much even if it turns out ugly, I think it's actually better that it turns out ugly and messy.

Otherwise, if the draft looks slightly more decent than expected, then I'd become too lazy to draw a more proper lineart. Whenever I remember to do so, I also use a gray-colored background so it's easier on my eyes, especially since I drew this after work.

For the "lineart", I used a brush called 촉펜 (MTL says it's "Touch Pen" in English; Content ID: 2050169). I recently started using this for doodles/sketches, it feels nice. It was free when I downloaded it, but it costs 10 Clippy now.

Anyway, I used a little bit more braincells for the "lineart" now after the draft, but then I didn't really try that hard to make it look clean, since I'm rushing to finish it as fast as I can. I just made sure that the outside lines are connected just enough for easier selection & coloring later.

Coloring & Shading

The coloring is where my experiment actually started! I usually go ahead and color them one-by-one per each color and part, but to be quicker, I used the Magic Wand selection tool to select the area outside the background, then inverting it so now the selection is at the characters *except* the background.

I then used the the bucket tool to fill the selection with the color I use as the base skin color. I still keep the selection there for further coloring purposes.

Just from here, I added another layer on top for the shading of the skin! For the shading, I used a brush called Yuri Watercolor (Content ID: 1889385). This one's really a paid brush, but I liked it a lot so I got it hahaha.

I do plan on replicating on doing this on IbisPaint one of these days! My plan so far is to use the free watercolor brush there, lower the brush opacity to around 60-70% and then draw the shading on a clipping layer set to the Multiply layer effect.

After shading, it looks like this now! I didn't mind the colors bleeding through the non-skin parts (except for two parts: the neck shading that would bleed to the face and thigh shading that would bleed to the skirt). I also used this brush to color Chrome's eye. Huhu I can't remember how I did it, helpskjfbjsbf

Then for the coloring of the hair and clothes, I just used the soft airbrush! I tried using the Yuri Watercolor brush for it too, but I couldn't quite grasp it yet on how to use it for coloring/shading those parts. I guess I know what to study next hahaha

When coloring the hair (and clothes), I did color the middle parts but didn't really full-on color till the edges to make that fading effect at the edge.

For the shading, I added clipping layers above and used the watercolor brush again!

For the hair highlights, I used the soft airbrush again. I just used a white color on a Soft Light layer effect to add a faint highlight on their hair (showed on picture on the left). Afterwards, I added another layer above with the Add/Glow effect and turned down the opacity to around 50%, to put more shine to it (showed on picture on the right).

Additionally, I also added a paper texture layer at the bottom! I also grouped up all the lineart and color layers into one folder and set the layer effect to Linear Burn.

Finally, after a bit color corrections/adjustments, blur filters (post-processing stuff, maybe for a different post?) and adding some decorations, the drawing is finally done! KuruKuro my beloved 💖

That's the process I'm playing around with so far, but I think I can still improve on it. I'm also planning on making a page on my wiki to compile my resources, references and such (maybe some free to use assets too). But anyway, that's all for now!

#putting this together is so fun!#einartlog

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