#i hope i got everything right its 2am | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

unsolvedjarin · 1 year

Note

Hi! If this inspires you, could you write a platonic fic where reader (who is around Charles’ age and is also teammates with him at Ferrari) is on the podium alongside him and Seb (this being set when Seb is at AM), but like that video or Lewis (that I can’t remember when it’s from) she already seemed exhausted while receiving her trophy, and when they exit the podium, she collapses onto Seb? Just hurt/comfort vibes from both drivers, really. Maybe Seb is close to her like a mentor, he’s worried about her? I think that’s it. Even if you don’t find it inspiring, thank you for sharing your fics. They’re really good. 😊💚

note: thank you for the kind words anon! i saw the word “exhausted” in the request and i kinda ran with it so this might have strayed from the original idea a little bit, but i hope it’s to your liking!

gif by overtake

THERE FOR YOU

pairing: (sebastian vettel x ferrari driver! reader, can be read as platonic or romantic) (charles leclerc x platonic! reader)

summary: you overwork yourself, and pay the consequences for it by passing out on the podium. lucky for you, a certain german driver has the means to catch you and take care of you.

word count: 2.1k

content warning: hurt/comfort, mostly fluff, not grammar checked writing because its 2am

You were going to throw up or faint any time now, you were sure of it.

“Are you sure you’re good?” A voice asked from beside you. You recognized it to be Charles, who was preparing for the race the same as you were.

“With this excessive asking I won’t be,” you retorted.

“I’m just looking out for you, amour. You haven’t been looking great.”

He was right, you looked awful. Everyone knew Spa was a tough track, but you looked like you had just gotten back from war— and the Sunday race hadn't even started yet.

You’d been feeling horrible all Saturday, but decided to ignore it. After all, Ferrari was counting on you that day to get a high position in quali since Charles was out in Q2.

You were starting in 4th today, Ferrari praising you for your good qualifying result. But the sleepless nights on the simulator along with the strain of being in a car going roughly 200 mph yesterday were detrimental to your health.

But of course, you were too stubborn to call in sick for Sunday— Ferrari was counting on you. And you couldn’t let them down.

“AND IT’S LIGHTS OUT IN SPA!”

The race was long and tedious, but eventually you managed to overtake Lewis and end up p3. Considering the heavy rain and how Charles spun out, you were surprised you even made it to the top 5.

You can’t remember how the race ended as you exited your car, weaker than you’ve ever felt before. The roar of the Tifosi was loud, cheering on your podium win. Whenever you won or got a podium they made you feel proud, a large grin on your face and goosebumps all over.

But not today.

Today, it was too loud. Too overwhelming. You could feel your head ache and pound at the noise. You felt a hand on your shoulder, Max coming to congratulate you. You think he had won the race but you couldn’t be sure, everything was too hazy.

“Congrats Y/N! Your first podium this season!”

You give Max a weak smile and a firm handshake, the pressure almost making your vision fade. God you needed to get out of there.

You looked around, there had to be an exit. Some place where you could rest your head for a second and regain your senses.

Thankfully, a guiding hand led you to the cooldown room, and you recognized it as Sebastian’s. He had gotten 2nd, that you knew, you were battling for his position earlier.

Once you got inside the cooldown room, there was no other word that could describe it but moist. The rain outside had moistened up the inside, barely enough to be noticeable, but to you, sweaty from the race and sick, it was enough to have you stumbling onto your chair.

Sebastian could sense something was wrong, he wasn’t stupid. To someone else you would’ve just seemed like someone who was simply exhausted from a race, but he wasn’t someone else. He knew you.

Before he could ask you about it, however, a man led all three of you out the cooldown room to go to the podium itself. You were moving with half-lidded eyes, and a really really sweaty body.

“And in third, the Ferrari favorite, Y/N L/N!”

You raise your arms as high as you can and put up two thumbs up, exerting all your effort to put up a show for the fans. They deserve it, you think.

Unbeknownst to you however, Charles was watching from the side with a worried look. He was the only one who knew about your sickness the past few days, and his concerned eyeing was not ignored by an observant Vettel.

The champagne spraying was everything but fun, the overstimulation getting to you. It was too much, everything was too much.

The sickness, the sweat, the champagne dripping down your face— you just needed to rest for a second, just…lay down maybe…

“Scheiße!” Sebastian shouted out, his voice not heard over the hollering of the fans. With all the chaos of the spraying of champagne and the bellows of the orange army, no one had noticed how you had fallen into Sebastian’s arms, passed out. He had dropped his champagne in the process, and the breaking of the glass was what had gotten Max to notice what happened. He discreetly ushered Charles, who was still watching from the sidelines, to help Sebastian pull your dull body away from the limelight.

People were starting to notice now, and there were worried glances among the fans and the teams, but were eventually calmed down by false reassurances of ‘everything is fine.’

It was not.

You were burning up, a fever so high it would put the sun to shame. Not only that, but Sebastian had noted how you seemed more physically worn than before. Not an unhealthy amount, god knows being an F1 driver wouldn’t allow that, but enough for it to be noticeable.

You were awake at this point already, but still weak. Lying down on a bed in the First Aid tent, your eyes threatened to close on you again, before Ferrari’s resident emergency doctor walked in.

“Well the good news is we don’t have to bring you to a hospital, you just have to get some food in your body and rest.”

That reassured Sebastian a little, but not enough. He needed to see you healthy and well, or he would be a nervous wreck all week. Thanking the doctor, he was left alone in the room with you again.

As much as he wanted to be there for you, Charles was held up by media duties, which meant that it was only you and Sebastian for a good while.

The German had always been kind to you. Not only was he your friend, but he’d also taught you everything he knew, and half your skills were something you had learnt from him. He was your support system, the one who always helped you when you were down, and the one who always had your back as you had his.

That’s why Sebastian didn’t understand why you hadn’t told him about your current ailment.

“When was the last time you slept?” Sebastian asked, the first words he’s spoken to you all day.

Shrugging faintly, you answer, “I don’t know.”

“Have you eaten anything today?”

“No.”

“Have you drank anything today?”

“Some Red Bull,” you mumbled, while attempting to slowly sit up on your bed.

Sebastian sighed. You weren’t taking care of yourself and it was killing him. “Why didn’t you sit this one out if you knew you were sick since yesterday?”

A beat of silence passes, and Sebastian could sense you contemplating if you should tell him the truth or not. He hoped you would do the former.

“…Because Ferrari is counting on me,” you finally answered meekly.

Of course. That was why. Your feeling of obligation to constantly deliver for your team was a feeling each driver shared with their own, but you always went above and beyond. ‘Couldn’t you see how you were much more important than some stupid points?’ Sebastian thinks.

Frowning, he sits down on a chair beside your bed, taking your warm hand and holding it with his own. “Schatzi, you’re hurting yourself. I know you want to deliver for yourself and your team, but this is not the way. If you keep going like this you’ll be sleeping at the wheel and end up worse than you are now. Please, I beg you, take a break.”

You wince internally at his words. He was right. You’d end up in a worse condition if you keep this up and disappoint your team even more.

“I just want to prove myself to Ferrari. Tell them I’m worth it to keep, you know? My contract is expiring soon, and I honestly don't know if any team would pick me up. I feel so— so lost and so hopeless— if I lose my seat I don’t know what to do. I mean I’ve built my entire life up to this, and now I just feel like a burnt out shitty driver.”

You had tears welling in your eyes, and Sebastian was quick to grab some tissue from the bedside table and wipe them away. He hated how you thought so low of yourself, he wished you could see yourself from his view, one of the best drivers and people he’s ever met.

“Your seat doesn’t measure your worth, Amore. Trust me, I know. After Ferrari I didn’t know what to do or where to go, my ‘golden boy’ status had faded and not a lot of teams wanted me anymore. But look at me, I’m here. I’m okay. And you will be too, just not like this.”

His words broke your composure, finally letting out all the stress and pain you’ve endured for days— weeks, even— in the form of full on sobbing. You were grateful for the privacy the room provided, as Sebastian hugged you tightly, not caring if he got your fever too. He whispered sweet words to you, stroking your hair and calming you down.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you. I’ve got you darling. Just let it all out,” you hear him murmur into your hair. You’re sure he said more things, but you couldn’t really hear them over the sound of your own sobs.

Eventually the dam dried up, and you attempted to compose yourself and wipe away all the evidence of your tears. Sebastian still held your hand, rubbing it reassuringly, reminding you of his presence. He was always constant in your life. You were thankful for that.

You both sat in the comfortable silence, allowing it to calm you after everything that just happened.

“I’m retiring next year,” Sebastian says out of the blue.

Okay, now you’re no longer calm again.

“I just thought you should be the first to know,” he adds.

“Wh- what? Why? You’re leaving? But no— you’re a pinnacle of the sport! You’re Sebastian Vettel! You can’t leave! You can’t just retire and leave me and- and-” you were starting to see black spots again, your emotions making you forget you were still physically weak.

Okay, maybe it wasn’t such a good idea for him to say that out of nowhere, Seb thinks. But it was now or never, and he wanted you to know before everybody else did. He wasn’t going to tell anyone in advance, but you were special to him. He couldn’t explain it, but you made him realize things in life. The way you enjoyed the little things, the way you laughed at stupid dad jokes, it made Sebastian miss the freedom of just…existing without having to worry about race after race after race.

Silencing you by enveloping your frantic hand with both of his larger ones and shushing you, he replied, “Calm down Liebling, I’m not leaving you. You still have me outside the track, you can visit me anytime and I would gladly let you in. I wouldn’t dare leave your life just like that, I’d never do that to you.”

You smiled softly at his words. He’d never do that to you. That’s why you loved him, whatever type of love it was. He was always there; a constant figure, and that wasn’t about to change. Sure you’d see each other less, but the love would still be there, and that’s all that would matter.

“I would get up and hug you, but I think we’ve both noticed that my body has decided to stop working on me,” you joke. Sebastian rolls his eyes in response, “And who’s fault is that?”

Oops. He got you there. “Mine,” you reply bashfully.

Thankfully he takes pity on you, and adjusts himself instead. “Scooch.” You move aside, giving him space to sit up beside you in your First Aid bed.

Putting his arm around you, he rubs your shoulder gently as you rest your head on his chest. This was nice.

“Don’t you have media duties? Aston Martin will kill you if you miss those,” you ask softly.

Sebastian simply shrugs, “You are more important to me than some reporters milking me for content like I’m a cow.”

His wording made you giggle, and the sound of you happy again makes Sebastian smile. He was going to get a scolding later for missing his duties, and he was definitely going to catch your cold from keeping you this close too, but it was all worth it when he heard that sound of laughter leave your throat.

The next season may be rough, it may not be as kind as this one was. It will be different, it will be lonelier, and it will feel lacking without Sebastian. But right now, as you sit on a bed in comfortable silence in a First Aid tent in Spa, being cared for by a man you care for, you get the sneakiest feeling that yeah— everything will be okay.

#sebastian vettel #sebastian vettel x reader #sebastian vettel x you #sebastian vettel imagine #formula one #formula 1 #formula 1 imagine #formula 1 x reader #formula 1 x you #writing #f1 fandom #f1blr #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #charles leclerc #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc x reader

2K notes · View notes

makos-ribcage · 2 months

Text

Why did Ultraman had to be so cute? ㅡ ༝ ˚ ｡⋆ 𓇼 ⋆｡ ˚ ༝

[] - Reader x Kenji Sato. Kenji needs your help.

𓇼she/her

warning ! mentions of blood.

word count- 2k

so ultraman has been my latest hyperfixation so i really enjoyed writting this and even rewatched to make sure everything made sense, it ended up being less romantic as i intended so its mostly a piece of life sort of? i rlly like it anyways and will probably write a continuation.

Being friends with a celebrity was hard. You knew him from when he was little, so he trusted you a lot, to the point you knew stuff about him that made him less flattering than the media would make him look.

You were there for him when his mom disappeared and you were as heartbroken as he was, you had such admiration for her that the moment you got the devastating news you decided it right there, you were going to follow her steps and become a KDF scientist, study Kaijus and make the cities at least a bit safer.

It’s not like it was a surprising decision for anyone, since always you’ve showed interest for kaijus. You liked to study with Professor Sato when you visited Ken, you liked to ask him stuff and getting explanations probably no one else could. When you told Ken your decision though, he looked troubled for a few seconds, you were confused but he quickly changed his expression, smiling to you and letting out a “Good luck with that��.

After that, the following years just made you more inseparable, until he left. You tried to keep in touch, but it was hard. Not because y’all hated each other or lost interest but work and studies just kept getting harder for you, and playing and growing as a baseball player in a foreign country was getting harder for him. In despite of that, you kept touch with Professor Sato, him guiding you through your career is something you’ll be forever grateful for.

So, when Kenji came back to the country and didn’t told you anything definitely made you slightly mad, but you had hopes to hear an explanation coming from him soon.

What you didn’t expect was a call from him at 2am after weeks of knowing he was here yet not contacting with you.

“Look, I know It’s sudden.” The distortion in his voice quickly threw you off. “I know its 2am in the morning, but I need you here.” You remained silent for a few seconds, thinking what could possibly be going through his mind. “Please, I need you.” Before you could say anything, he hung up. You were worried. You saw in the news how Ken Sato didn’t show up to two games now, and apparently has been missing for months, just because of that, you were actually going to drive to the other side of the city.

The location to his home wasn’t unknown, but it was remote and hard to get in, but you managed to get in time. The sky was cloudy, the night was dark and cold, and you were glad you were driving a car and not that damned motorcycle of him, on top of that, the disappearing bridge connecting his home with the city made you a bit scared.

A smart gate let you in, somehow knowing you were you. You knew a lot about technology thanks to your job, but Sato’s residence always were a few steps ahead, given the fact that both parents used to be scientifics.

You parked near the door, stepping out of the car and walking to the house. It was quiet and it spooked you a little bit.

You were unsure as if you should knock the door, they knew you were there from the gate, but you still did.

“Come on in!” Hearing it in person the voice sounded more distorted, you knew it was him, but it sounded distant, loud and robotic.

You opened the door, stepping inside and closing it behind you, a big empty living room welcomed you.

“Uh… I know it’s… Hard to understand, and I know you hate him, and…” You heard his voice again, this time coming from what seemed speakers around the house.

“Hate him? Who?” You questioned, even though you weren’t sure he could hear you.

“Just Imma need you to keep it as a secret, and don’t freak out!” He seemed to be stumbling on his own words. You saw an elevator come out of the floor, you didn’t question it much and just stepped in, feeling a bit dizzy as it went down.

“You’re the only smart person I know… And I’ll be in a lot of trouble if you decide to speak ‘bout it, but I trust you.” You weren’t hearing him through the speakers anymore, yet he sounded loud. “I need you to not yell me, judge me, or be mad at me, just help me.” Every time he said anything, it made you more confused, what could be so bad?

One of the walls of the elevator raised, letting you get out of it.

And you saw him. Ultraman.

“Surprise…” You heard Sato’s voice coming out of him.

He was crouching because of the tall walls, not tall enough for him though.

“Ah… You’ve got to be kidding me.” You whispered, feeling surprised and annoyed at the same time.

The little big asshole who was ruining any time the KDF tried to capture kaijus was your childhood best friend.

The arrogant giant who would destroy apartments instead of safely getting kaijus out of the city was a famous baseball player.

And you knew him too well, enough for him to tell you who he was, and now you had to help him and keep his identity a secret.

“I wish I was…” You heard him whisper, though whispering at that size didn’t count as a whisper. “I can’t turn back. I’m stuck.” He explained, you walked closer to him, and he sat down crossed leg, not needing to crouch anymore.

“That’s why you didn’t went to your games?” You asked, he drew a hand near you, palms up, he wanted you to step on it.

You hesitated, a bit scared of heights, but did it anyways. You sat on his palm, legs crossed as well, and he held you with both hands.

“And what do you want me to do?” You questioned, having mixed feelings about if you were helping your best friend or the reason of your headaches at work.

“I don’t know… You know a lot about kaijus, I’m basically the same.” He was not, both of you knew that, but whatever. “Please…” He gave you what seemed to be puppy eyes, even though you could only see white pupils.

“I’ll see what I can do… You still got your dad’s stuff?” You asked, he nodded. “Mina?” He called, and the little ball assistant appeared, with said stuff literally coming from the floor.

Complicated machines, complicated tools, some similar to the ones you’ll see at work, some you’ve never seen before but you guessed you’ll have to figure out.

“Alright… Put me down, I guess.”

You made him a simple blood test. Finding veins on such body was hard, trying to identify anything on the blood sample was harder.

“So… What are you? A machine? A monster?” You asked, both out of curiosity and because it could help you figure out what happened to him.

“I’m not sure… My dad told me we are like… Aliens, or used to be, at least.” He explained.

“Well, some kaijus come from the space.” You started. “Maybe you are closer to kaijus than you think.” He seemed to think about it for a while, you knew how he struggled to see kaijus as anything else than soulless monsters.

“Mina, can you check this, please?” You told her, giving her the blood sample. She took it and left.

You stared at him, with a mix of confusion and aweness.

“See something you like? Hm?” He said with a flirty voice. You laughed.

“Not yet, ask me again when you’re Kenji and not Ultraman” You flirted back, making him slightly surprised.

Mina came back, with a piece of paper that noted anything found. A bunch of cells you didn’t knew, probably part of his alien side, but you recognized something.

A common virus found on some kaijus that made them incapable of controlling their powers, which seemed to be what was happening to him.

“Alright… How do I get rid of it?” He asked once you explained the situation, you could see the desperation in his eyes.

“Well… We don’t really cure kaijus when they’re sick, and we can’t treat it like a normal virus since you’re humongous and can’t drink or eat…” You thought, sitting on the floor, feeling his puppy eyes back on you. “Kaijus can usually get rid of the viruses by themselves, so if we can mimic kaijus antibodies, you might be able to do the same.” You explained, and he agreed, just wanting to get out of the situation.

You were a bit worried his body couldn’t handle it, but you trusted that his alien-self would do the work.

You gave the indications to Mina; you were lucky she had Professor Sato knowledge on her.

You modified Kenji’s blood so it would produce the antibodies that were needed.

“So… I reprogrammed your cells to produce what we need, kind of like a cancer.” The word spooked him, but he trusted you.

Mina set everything up for the blood transfusion.

“Alright… I hope you understand this is risky” You muttered to him, trying to prepare his arm. “Gosh, you’re huge…”

“I know, just hurry up.” You heard him say, hints of normal Kenji voice behind the <<robotic>> filter that it gave his voice. You stared up to him a bit annoyed by his rushing. “And… You’re the best scientist I know, so please help me.” You blushed slightly, shaking your head.

“Thank you, I guess.” You whispered, feeling those uncanny white pupils on you. “Alright… Here I go…” With the help of Mina once again, you started the process. “Let me know If you feel something…” You told him, staring at him worried it might go all wrong.

You sat down with him, on one of his thighs, waiting for it to have any effect.

“So… You’re Ultraman” You stared at him. He simply shrugged, not seeming to be too happy about it. “I’m guessing that’s why you came back from America.” He nodded, not elaborating any further.

“I’m sorry… I know I’ve been causing trouble to… Ya’ll” You knew what he was referring to, the KDF.

"It's okay... You should start doing better, though. It's difficult relocating people and fixing buildings and...” You scolded him, both because you were right and because you enjoyed annoying him, and you knew you succeeded when he sighed audibly.

“I know, I know! I'm trying, alright?" You laughed slightly, him laughing back when he noticed you were just playing with him, even if there was a piece of truth behind your words.

“You know?... I missed you, I was sad you didn’t call me” You whispered, probably feeling less exposed since he didn’t looked like Kenji, you were sure you were going to regret it, but it was late at night and you were tired. You let yourself lay down, still on top of his thigh. “Oh, you did?” You heard him, somehow, hearing his smile. “I’m sorry, I thought you were mad.” He whispered, realizing you were falling asleep.

“And I was… You could still have called me, though.” You whispered back.

You woke up hours later, feeling the harsh floor under you, with the warmth of arms around you. Blinking slowly trying to adjust to the light, looking up to see Kenji in a deep sleep, hugging you tightly.

You blushed, freezing in your place unsure of what to do. “K-Ken…” You called up to him, trying to squeeze yourself free.

“Ngh… Five mins’ more…” He whispered, raspy morning voice getting to your ears as he hugged you tighter. Suddenly he opened his eyes. “You’re not small anymore!” He exclaimed, happily. “I’m not huge!” He stood up, taking you with him. “You saved me!” He hugged you tightly. “Thank you!” He grabbed you by the shoulders, staring into your eyes with a huge smile on his face. You blushed. Why did Ultraman had to be so cute? “Coach is going to kill me.” He said suddenly, running towards the elevator you came from.

“Kenji…” You called, annoyed that he was leaving you just like that.

“A-Ah… I’ll take you to dinner, yes? Tonkatsu Toki. 7pm. I’ll pick you up.” He didn’t let you answer and just left.

-----

-tags

@luneariaa @aise-30 @kalsplace

#kenji sato #kenji sato x reader #ultraman #ultraman rising #ultraman ken #fanfic #ken sato #ultraman netflix #mako's works

263 notes · View notes

layuhsblog · 2 months

Text

Keep Calm pt2| Gojo X Reader (Angst Ending) TW

warnings: mentions of abortion, cheating, throwing up, its rough guys, abandonment , nanami is a sweetheart.

A part of you wanted to keep this from him, the other, although was mad, knew it was his right to know he was gonna be a father.

You couldn't sleep that night, you couldn't stop crying as you packed his things. You thought about what you will say to him, but nothing felt right. The thought of seeing his face, made you want to throw up. God, you loved him so much but you were disgusted by what he said. For the right reasons as well.

Your phone buzzed from evening to night, then stopped altogether at 2am in the morning. Figured he'd slept. You couldn't though. Part of you wanted to fix things the other knew that his job was too demanding for him to be a father. Another part of you knew, you couldn't afford to raise a baby alone.

'I dont wanna think about it!' You shook those thoughts away and clutched your stomach. You wanted to keep it so bad. Ever since you were a child. You wanted to be a mother so bad..

When did everything change, when did you become such a workaholic.

You sobbed and sobbed wondering where everything went wrong and eventually slept.

Your alarm woke you up around 8am. Nope, you cannot deal with your shit boss today. You took a day off. Not caring whatever shit you'll hear from him for it. Fuck that.

You took a hot shower, the water easing your racing thoughts a bit. You were dreading to break the news. You felt so fucking alone right now.

Getting dressed, you dialed up your bestfriend. Probably the last person you should've called.

"I'm really sorry to bring you into our mess Nanami, I just, really needed to talk to someone that understood my point of view."

"I understand ___, I'm glad to help. It's not easy working in the corporate environment."

"God, I know I should've told him first, but I feel so alone in this. I-I don't know how he'll react- And I can't seem to- I don't want to-" You started tearing up, Nanami hesitantly rubbed your back, trying to soothe you.

"Listen, as much as I hate Gojo, he will understand. He'll be supportive. I hope the both of you can make it work." You started sobbing at what he said. You hoped he was right. He gave you a handkerchief to wipe your tears. You were grateful that you both had such a good friend.

"Wash your face and get ready, I'll drive you to his place. No matter what happens, you have me and Shoko to support you okay?" For the first time that day you gave a small smile.

Nanami waited in the car with Gojo's stuff, while you nervously stood infront of his door.

Taking deep breaths, you rang the doorbell.

You waited for a bit, nothing.

You rang the bell again. There he was, shirtless, ruffled hair, blue orbs staring down at you in surprise.

"Y/n..? What are you doing here?" He was...not happy to see you?

He got a good look at you and his stomach churned. Your eyes were so swollen, you looked like a mess.

"Gojo I, came to drop your stuff."

"Baby please, we can make this work. Please don't leave me. I-I love you. I'm really sorry for what I said to you...I-I didn't mean it-"

"Satoru, I'm pregnant. You told me I'm choosing work over you? I'll work on it. But first you need to tell me- are you willing to do the same for me? I want this baby. I cannot do this without you and I-I'm willing to forgive you. Just, you need to choose. Is it me or-"

His head dropped low, in a very low voice he said something you weren't ready to hear,

"..I cannot do that. I'm sorry ___, my students need me. If I had a choice I'd stay. But I can't, being The Strongest comes at a price..." To his surprise, you gave him a defeated smile, eyes brimmed with tears. You said nothing except,

"I'll ask Nanami to bring your stuff from the car."

"...will you go ahead with the pregnancy?"

Before you could answer, you heard a voice in the back-

"Toru? Baby, what's taking so long?" Oh you knew that voice. That's why your phone stopped buzzing at night huh? You wanted to laugh, you felt so fucking pathetic right now. It dawned upon you, you were never the choice. It was never going to be you.

"___, I can expla-"

"Well, I won't now. Glad you took my advice Gojo, have fun with (ex name)."

You got back in the car. Gojo tried to follow you, thankfully Nanami got the hint and drove off. Whilst driving, he spared you a pitiful glance,

"___, I didn't expect this from him. I'm..sorry, if you want to keep it, Shoko and I can help you raise the child. You don't have to give up on your dreams for him."

"I didn't expect this from him either, please drive to the clinic." Your voice, shaky and cold. You looked out the window, blinking away your tears. He didn't say anything else, just nodded understandingly, if you didn't want to keep it, he couldn't stop you- it was your choice.

Nanami knew the one person this decision was hurting the most is yourself- you didn't want to depend on anyone again, didn't want to raise a child in the mental state you were in. He was so angry he was gonna kill Satoru, that's no way to treat a lady. He'd warned him multiple times.

But for now he'll do his best to be a good friend to you. That's the least he could do for you.

(DONT YOU DARE SHIP OC AND NANAMI TOGETHER. I didn't want it to be a cliche ending where the bestfriend gets the girl. Sometimes in your hard times you just need a friend and that's what I wanted to show.)

#jujutsu angst #anime #jjk gojo #gojo angst #jujutsu fluff #gojo satoru #jujutsu kaisen angst #jujutsu kaisen #gojo saturo #gojo satoru imagine

87 notes · View notes

vioartemis · 1 year

Text

I love her so much...

(Jenna Ortega x fem! reader)

Summary: After she comes home late in the night, Jenna and you have a fight Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 2 [au] Request is here :)) Warnings: angst (English isn't my first language, I'm sorry if there are mistakes or if something doesn't make sense TvT)

You had been Jenna's girlfriend for almost two years, but lately, your relationship wasn't at its best. Rather at its worse actually. She had been ignoring you lately, and it was starting to be difficult to deal with.

You were alone at your shared appartement, in tears, when the doorbell rang. You got up shakily and made your way to the door, opening it for the girl behind it.

"Hey..." she said

"Hey..." you replied

You stepped to the side so she could enter, but quickly broke down in her arms.

"I don't know what to do Emma... I can't... I can't do this anymore..."

The girl held you close and rubbed your back, before leading you to the couch where you could both sit.

"I know, I understand... Maybe..." she bit her lip

"What...?"

"If you wait for her to come home you could talk, get things straight..."

"I don't even know if she will come home tonight..."

"It's okay, I'm sure she will... I'll stay with you until then if you want..."

"Yes please..."

Time passed by, and quickly it was 2am.

As you were still crying in Emma's arms, you heard the door of your appartement open, followed by footsteps. Jenna was home. Finally.

She entered the room, putting her keys back in her bag, and froze and she saw you.

"Where the fuck where you?" you asked

"Are you cheating on me?"

You couldn't believe your ears. Did she really asked that?

"I should probably go..." Emma said, getting up

"No, stay" you tell her, before turning to your girlfriend "You're seriously asking me if I am cheating on you?"

To everyone's surprise, you let out a laugh.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me. You've been ignoring me for weeks, and I am the one who's cheating? You get up so early and come back so late I don't even see you anymore! And when you don't you spend all your time with Percy! "

"I'm sick of your jealousy Y/n! I told you there's nothing between Percy and I-"

"I know!" you cut her off "But you spend all your time with him! It's like I don't exist anymore! Do you even care about me? About us?"

"Of course I do!"

"Okay then. What day is it?"

"What? I don't know the... the 4th of July?"

"And?"

"And what?"

"What. Day. Is. It?" you repeated, throat tight

She stayed silent. You could tell she was thinking hard. Which hurt you even more.

"I- I don't know, Y/n."

You chuckled, whipping the tears in your eyes with shaky hands. You wanted to believe she would remember. You wanted to believe you were important to her. She just crushed all your hopes.

"It's our anniversary, Jenna. Was our anniversary, considering that it's 2am now. You really do care a lot, huh?"

You watched as realization hit her. Maybe she did care a little after all.

"So you spent our anniversary with Emma?"

Or not.

"Don't try to turn the situation around. I spent all day waiting for you. I had everything planned. I thought we would finally be able to be together and talk about us." you felt your anger rising "I called you 27 times. 27 fucking times Jenna. You never picked up, not once. I texted you too. Still no answer. So yes, I called Emma. It was already past midnight. I called her once, and guess what? She answered and came, even at that time."

You had to take a deep breath to prevent tears from rolling down your cheeks.

"Y/n I'm sorry I was-"

"With Percy? Figured that out."

"No it's not-"

"Jesus, Jenna! Stop trying to find excuses! Stop pretending that you care about us! You didn't even remember it was our anniversary!"

"Of course I care I- there's just... a lot going on right now... But I love you Y/n..."

You couldn't help another chuckle to escape your throat.

"No, you don't love me! You ignore my calls, my texts, you don't kiss me anymore, you don't talk to me anymore, you don't even look at me anymore! How can you say you love me when you do all that...?"

"I do! I- I love you I-"

"If you really loved me you would've picked up. Read my texts. Answered me in any way. But you didn't, Jenna. You left me alone on the day of our anniversary, crying all the tears in my body when I understood you wouldn't come."

"But I didn't know! If I knew you were crying I would've-"

"Of course you didn't know. How would you know, considering you barely say hello to me these days? And what would you have done? Taking me in your arms, telling me everything would be okay, even though we both know it's not true?"

"N-no I- I would've... I would've..."

She too had tears in her eyes now. She was hurt, and it only made things worst for you. But you had to. You couldn't continue living like this.

"It's too late, Jenna. I- I can't..."

"What...?"

"I can't keep up doing this." you took another deep breath, fist clenched hard "It's over, Jenna."

It hurt you to do this, but she didn't leave you any other choice. This relationship had become toxic, and for your own good, you had to end it.

"What...?" she repeated "N-no Y/n wait..."

You took a little box out of your pocket and threw it at her. She caught it, confused.

"Here, your anniversary gift."

You then walked past her, to the door.

"What are you doing...?" the brunette asked, her voice trembling

"I'm leaving." you had to make an insane effort not to cry "I'll be back tomorrow to pack my things."

You didn't wait for an answer and got out of the appartement, Emma following you.

Deep down, you hoped she would burst out of the flat and follow you, try to hold you back, do anything that could prove she still loved you. But she didn't.

You arrived on the sidewalk without anyone to stop you. That did it for you.

You broke down again, in the middle of the street, letting all the tears flood down your cheeks, all the sadness, the pain, out. Your heart was in million pieces.

And again, Emma took you in her arms, patting your back gently.

Jenna didn't move from her previous position, in the middle of your living room. She was devastated, tears rolling down her cheeks. She never meant to push you away. She felt like she had ruined everything. And it was the truth. She did.

She wanted to run after you, tell you she was sorry, tell you she would try to be better, to be more here, anything that could make you come back. But her legs weren't working. No matter how hard she tried to move, she couldn't.

Her own incapacity to do anything only made her cry more. With a cry, she finally managed to move and stumbled to the window.

And what she saw really broke her.

You, in Emma's arms, again. You were crying, again, because of her.

She loved you, she really did. But all she did was hurting you lately. She didn't deserve you. You didn't deserve to be with someone like her.

Maybe it was better if she didn't try to hold you back...

You wanted to run back to her, hold her tight, kiss her, tell her you didn't mean it, tell her you loved her... But you couldn't. It was simply not good for you.

Your cries only intensified at the thought.

"Y/n..."

"I love her so much..." you cried out, voice hoarse from crying

"I know... I know..."

[Next part] || [Next part [au]]

#jenna ortega #jenna ortega x reader #jenna ortega x fem reader

622 notes · View notes

cryingisnecessaryfanfics · 9 months

Text

PART TWO

Its 2am have more scar headcannons/imagines

Characters: Razor(platonic), Kaeya, Xiao, Tighnari

Sorry these are probs subpar cuz my writing style varies depending on the bpd mood lmao. Bear with the redundancy of these, there are only so many ways to write the same action.

If youre the anon who sent me an ask im replying to your ask with the inverse you talked about. Stay tuned <3 (its probably gonna take another 6 months but welp)

Not spell checked or proof read sorry lol

Razor (platonic)

Wolf boy has a lot of scars as we can all tell. I feel like he probably doesnt get the point of lotion. Probably says it smells bad, like chemicals. His scars are all really improperly healed. Probably has keloid scars (overproduction of scar tissue). The sheer size of the ones on his arms lead me to believe he never got stitches or bandages of any sort, which makes sense considering his story. Regardless, that shit looks painful lmao. (Lighthearted imagine to start us off)

“Razor!” You yell, damn that kid was way faster than you. You nearly trip over a log as you run after him.

“Razor, stop running dammit.” You continue to shout after him, hoping anything you say might just make him slow down. Lord knows you could never catch up to him.

“It's just lotion. It'll make you feel better!” Your lungs start to sting from the chase and your legs drag behind you. You stop to catch your breath and Razor slows down in front of you.

He approaches you slowly like he's afraid you’ll catch him if he gets too close. “Smells bad,” he says and you all but roll your eyes.

“Sometimes things that are good for us smell bad.” You explain. Razor waits for your breathing to even out before he gets within arms reach of you.

“Like soap?” He says and you laugh at the memory of trying to get him to wash himself with soap instead of the occasional dip in the river.

“Yes, like soap.” You sigh and he frowns. Tentatively he holds out his arm, he looks at you expectantly.

“Finally.” You say under your breath and open the bottle of lotion. You can practically feel Razor's eyes watch your hands cautiously. He doesn't move as you spread some against the skin of his arm.

“Cold.” He comments and you huff a little laugh.

“See.” You say when you finish. “Feels better right?”

Razor finally relaxes and smiles at you. “Yes.”

You're just glad he stopped running.

Kaeya

Not gonna go the obvious way and say his eyepatch because I'm different lmao. I think his knuckles are scarred. I think kaeya seems like the type to cope with his feelings through violence. I think kaeya probably hates himself. When everything gets to be too much he just starts coming out swinging. The kind of person who punches a wall without really thinking about it. But yeah I think he used his fists too much when he was younger and now he wears the fingerless gloves to protect/cover the scars. (Sorry if this is weird or seems ooc, it just makes sense to me idk why)

You first see them when he gets the new outfit in sumeru. Everyone around you seems to disregard them, or maybe just not notice. But you can sense the way he subtly hides the scars, the way he walks with a hand behind his back, one covering the other. Its easy to not notice if you arent always watching closely. Maybe the only reason you noticed was because you seemed to always be staring at him. Kaeya catches you looking more than once and in typical kaeya fashion he deflects with flirting or jokes.

Later, when youve returned home to mondstat you ask him about it and he explains after some persistence.

“Its nothing to be shameful of.” You murmur, a hand holding his, looking at the dry scar tissue.

“Its one thing to have scars from braving a battle, a complete other thing to have them from your own stupidity.” He looks away from you and the eye you can see seems far away. Like he’s recalling something from his past.

“But it wasnt stupid, it was a way to cope. How can anyone think of something like that as not brave?” He doesnt answer you, only frowns slightly, a face youve never seen him make. “Do you atleast take care of them?”

He still doesnt respond. You sigh, exasperated, and pull out your endless bag of goods to find a lotion to help with the dryness.

“What are you doing?” He asks, and you all but cringe at the thought of him not knowing you have to moisturize scars.

“I’m helping you.” You half expect him to make a witty comment but the situation proves to be too heavy and he goes back to staying silent. The whole act goes without words, you spread the lotion over his knuckles, rub it in gently. He doesnt say anything until you slide his gloves back on.

“Thank you.” He says and before you can say anything back he adds, “For your actions and your words.”

You press a kiss to one of his gloved hands. “Your welcome.” You thnk you see his cheeks tint the slightest shade of red before hes back to normal again.

“And here I thought I was the romantic.”

Xiao

I always liked the images of the karmic binds/shackles so I like to imagine his wrists are scarred from straining(?) those too much. I mean considering Xiao is an Adeptus physical wounds wouldn't leave a scar so maybe these more mental-type wounds would. Like the more karmic debt he has the worse the scars get in condition, the less debt the more they fade. Maybe the lotion helps soothe the debt more than anything. Maybe the act of something so comforting and intimate with you lessens the pain. Food for thought I guess.

Every morning, at dawn, Xiao enters a room in Wangshu Inn so his lover can put lotion on his scars. This morning is no different.

“Good morning, Xiao.” You say like always, same pretty smile on your face every day.

“Morning,” Xiao mumbles and frowns as if this isn't his favorite part of the day. He avoids your eyes as he takes off his gloves. As many times as youve seen his wrists, he still gets insecure about them. It's no secret Xiao hates being vulnerable, even around his most trusted companion.

“I saw zhongli yesterday.” You say quietly as he sits down on the bed next to you, lotion in hand. “He was with that harbinger.”

“Tch. Useless scum.” Xiao comments and you laugh.

“He seemed happy, Xiao. Try to be tolerant of his friend.” Xiao just rolls his eyes and rests his arm in your hand. You continue to talk about your day as you open the bottle of lotion and start to spread it out against his wrist.

Xiao stays quiet during this, as he always does. You think he must enjoy your voice because he's always been intent on listening to you speak even if he usually prefers silence. He absorbs your words so soaked in affection and the ache in his body seems to lessen. Pain becomes distant, horrible and intense feelings become easier to push away.

It's over before he realizes it, you've put the lotion away simply holding his hand now, savoring the feeling of his skin against yours. He leans against you and you hum in content.

Maybe this is healing for the both of you. Mutual comfort.

Tighnari

I know a lot of people like the idea of him having scars from getting struck by lightning so i'm just gonna play off of that. Lighting very rarely leaves scars but the scars it does leave are burns. The electricity also causes nerve damage so you'd have to be very gentle and careful when handling tighnari’s scars. They're probably on his neck/back so itd take a lot of trust for him to let you see him so vulnerable. He probably already has lotion he puts on himself but its very hard to reach your own back so eventually he asks you for help.

You've seen him put lotion on his scars many times, watched him wince at the pain of it. You refrain from asking him if he wants your help. Tighnari is independent, he doesn't need anyone's help. But maybe itd be less painful if he didn't have to strain his muscles to reach the scars.

He doesn't say much when he asks the first time. Just tells you to be careful. He starts to list the ingredients of the lotion he's made. How he found it, what the weather was like that day.

No matter how gentle you were he’d still pause in the middle of sentences, and with his back to you, you never saw his winces but you knew they were there.

“Okay,” you say when you've finished and you know he's relieved it's over even if it was a more pleasant experience than him doing it himself.

But he thanks you anyway, and he’ll ask you to do it again the next day.

#genshin #genshin fanfic #genshin impact #gender neutral reader #genshin imagines #genshin fluff #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #xiao x reader #kaeya x reader #razor gi #razor genshin impact #tighnari #tighnari x reader #genshin xiao #genshin kaeya #genshin tighnari

166 notes · View notes

explodingstar · 5 months

Text

I miss you Simon.

Warnings: NSFW 18+

Pairings: Simon Riley x f!reader

It was a slow day for you back home all the household chores were done and dinner was already made for later tonight. Just some leftovers from the night before, reheated. Simon had only left a couple weeks ago to go back on deployment to another mission. You miss him already and damn do you miss him. You grab a book and lay down in bed with only the bedside lamp illuminating the darkness of the bedroom.

Buzz buzz

A text? From Simon? You pick up your phone hoping to see his name in your notifications instead its just another alert from facebook. You roll your eyes and put down your phone again but you REALLY needed him to text you especially with the mood you were in at the moment. All of a sudden an idea comes to your mind and you put the book you were reading down on the bedside table alongside your glass of wine. Was this a drunken idea? Possibly. Did it still seem like a good idea?

Definitely.

You get up and walk over to your closet and grab Simons favorite article of clothing that he LOVES to see you in. A black lacy one piece that is just sheer enough to see everything, in the right lighting. You grab your tripod and set it up at the edge of the bed and change into the lingerie that Simon had essentially tried to rip off of you before. You set up your phone on the tripod and turn it on video mode to take screenshots of it later. At first you pose a couple different ways. One on your knees with your arms pushing your tits together and your hands on the bed in front of you. Another one with the top of the one piece down so your tits are fully out and your hands running through your long gorgeous hair. You get to thinking…‘What would Simon enjoy most?’ An idea hits you. You turn your back to the camera and seductively bend over to where your ass is in the air and your soaking wet pussy can be seen through the sheer lingerie that you decided to put on. You get up and grab your phone looking through the video to make sure everything is perfect. A couple screenshots here, a couple there and you make a little folder called “For Simon”.

“This should get him to text me…” ‘attachment delivered’ you read.

Simon’s POV

DING “Simon! You got a message!” “Thanks Johnny I’m pretty sure I can hear” Simon says annoyingly. He picks up his phone and opens your message. He smirks to himself and stands up from his seat. “I’ll be right back mates” He goes into the bathroom off of the barracks just for a bit more privacy.

Your POV

RING RING RING You look down at your phone blushing when you see Simon’s name and photo come across your screen. You slide over to answer “Hiiii Simon” You hear the sound of metal clinking together and you know exactly what it is, his belt coming undone with one hand. “Im going to assume you got my pictures love”

“Ughh Fuck. I did..ya miss me don’t ‘cha?” He says through grunts. “I always do” you say rubbing yourself just to the sound of his voice. A small moan escaping your lips as you do so. “Wait till I get back…you wont be able to walk for teasing me like this…oh fuck” he says softly. He continues stroking his cock still looking at the pictures you sent. “I cant wait for you to come home.” You say with your middle finger slowly pumping in and out of you. “Fuck..well lucky for you I get home tomorrow…”

A/N: I plan on making this a part 1! Part 2 would be Simon coming home. 😈 (Sorry for any errors its almost 2AM.)

#cod #cod fanfic #cod modern warfare #cod mw3 #cod x reader #ghost cod #simon riley x reader #simon riley x you

100 notes · View notes

ellabehavior · 1 year

Text

You’re on your own kid ~ Rafe Cameron ☼

Summary: Rafe and you have been best friends since you were young. However, now that he got his new girlfriend you suddenly realized that you could possibly like him more than simply as a friend.

Pairing: Rafe Cameron x Fem!Reader

Warnings: anxiety, mentions of drinking

A/N: Its been a while yall, but i’m back!! I hope y’all enjoy :)! ( i hateee this but i hope y’all love)

angst to soft!

Summer went away,

You’ve been best friends with Rafe since as long as you can remember, but last summer was the summer where everything changed.

The summer before your first year of college.

School was back up and you were also starting to look at Rafe with a different eye. He was taller, tanner, smarter, he’s growing up.

Still the yearning stays.

Everytime you’d pass Rafe in the hallway hed give you a short smile but never really acknowledge you.

You missed last summer when you guys would hang out everyday, tell eachothers every little secret, and have the best deep conversations at 2am.

You knew at this moment that things might never be the same again.

I play it cool with the best of them.

For the first time in months Rafe contacted you, he invited you to go to a party with a lot of people from your school.

When you arrived, that’s when you seen him with her.

He had his arm around her neck and her long blonde hair rested on his lower arm.

I wait patiently, he’s gonna notice me.

“It’s ok, It’s ok” You whisper quietly while gaining the courage to go up and talk to Rafe.

As you walk up to him he gives you a half-hug due to the blonde on his right.

“Hey Y/N i haven’t seen you in a while.” He grins.

“Yeahhh, I guess i’ve been busy yknow with all the test and s-” Immediately you get cut off by a high pitched voice.

“Rafeyyy cmon let’s go play some games this is boring.” She says with a pout.

“Mkay babe. Bye Y/n” The boy said walking away without a glance at you.

It’s ok we’re the best of friends, anyways…

About a week after the party Rafe finally calls to check up on you.

“Hey y/n.” He drowsily says .

“Rafe? It’s 1:00am what are you calling me for?” You voice concerningly

“I just miss my bestie that’s all” He laughs.

I hear it in your voice,

You're smoking with your boys.

I touch my phone as if it's your face.

“Rafe are you high right now?” You almost shout.

“Yes, Maybe, No.” He giggles.

“Rafe do you need me to come get you?”

You rush to grab your keys and your wallet to go pick Rafe up.

“No i’m here with my girlfriend.” He says.

You stop in your tracks, immediately getting a sick feeling in your stomach as soon as those words come out from his mouth.

“Oh Okay, we’ll I’ll talk to you some other time okay?” You suggest.

And with that he hangs up the phone without a goodbye.

I didn't choose this town,

I dream of getting out.

There's just one who could make me stay,

All my days.

As a kid you and Rafe would always talk about how when you guys were 25 you’d move to London together, and to this day that’s still your biggest dream.

You hate this place, it’s full of people who will be rude to you just based off of how you grew up.

Surprisingly Rafe is now dating one of those girls, Lily.

From sprinkler splashes to fireplace ashes

I waited ages to see you there

I search the party of better bodies

Just to learn that you never cared

You promised yourself after last time you would never go to another college party, but here you find yourself at one that Rafe invited you to.

You would be lying if you said you’re here because you wanted to party, you’re waiting to see him.

You see Lily off in the crowd dancing, She’s perfect. You understand why Rafe would pick her. Her hair flows perfectly in the wind, her makeup is never less than flawless, and even though you want to tell yourself that she’s ugly, she’s one of the prettiest girls you’ve ever seen.

As you study Lily you see Rafe come up from behind her and hug her.

You're on your own, kid

You always have been

The whole night Rafe didn’t even bat a single eye at you, so you left.

I see the great escape

So long, Daisy May

I picked the petals, he loves me not

Something different bloomed

Writing in my room

I play my songs in the parking lot

I'll run away

You tried to distance yourself ever since the party, finally realizing this crush is starting to form into something you don’t need right now.

It’s been exactly 2 weeks since you’ve gone no contact with Rafe and if there were 20 stages of grief, you’ve been through 30.

All you want to do is call him, text him, or tell yourself that maybe he’s just using Lily as a distraction because he really likes you.

“Why is it never me.”

From sprinkler splashes to fireplace ashes

I called a taxi to take me there

I search the party of better bodies

Just to learn that my dreams aren't rare

It’s a cycle.

Another party, Another slap in the face.

You can see the other girls also looking at Lily wishing they could be with Rafe.

The realization kills you to know that it’ll probably never be you in that spot with all these options he has.

You're on your own, kid,

You always have been.

It’s a drunken night, and you’ll definitely regret this.

“Rafeyyy babyyy” you slur.

“Y/N? Why are you calling me in the middle of the night?” You can tell he is worried in his tone.

“I don’t like her. She’s rude, you deserve better.”

There is a long pause and then you hear someone speak, “He’s never liked you babe. You’re nothing compared to me, and you know that.”

The phone hung up.

From sprinkler splashes to fireplace ashes

I gave my blood, sweat, and tears for this

I hosted parties and starved my body

Like I'd be saved by a perfect kiss

It’s been hard to do anything since the altercation.

Eating, Getting up, Going to class, Socializing, and pretty much everything feels like a chore.

You’ve tried so hard to get his attention yet he never seemed to care.

And of course as a mean girl, Lily decided to tell everyone about what you said to Rafe. Of course he apologized for what she said, and for what happened but that didn’t stop the whole school for coming at you for a whole week.

The jokes weren't funny, I took the money

My friends from home don't know what to say

I looked around in a blood-soaked gown

And I saw something they can't take away

You received a text message late at night, usual for Rafe.

Rafe: Hey, i’m so sorry for what Lily caused. You’re my best friend and I realized nothing is worth loosing that, me and her are over now after a long talk.. Can we please hang out? I miss you.

Fuck. This is what you’ve been longing for all these months and it finally is here.

You: Yeah sure, Sleepover? my place tmmrw? ;)

Rafe: Ofc. I miss you. Cya.

Cause there were pages turned with the bridges burned

Everything you lose is a step you take

So make the friendship bracelets

Take the moment and taste it

You've got no reason to be afraid

The anxiety levels are high waiting for Rafe to come over, it’s been so long since you’ve had a real conversation through all this time of him being with Lily.

You start to wonder if he still likes Starwars, or if his favorite dancing song is 22 by Taylor Swift.

You then hear a knock on the door.

You're on your own, kid

“Hey!! Can I come in” he says.

“Of course.”

Then the catching up, the apology’s, and the stories start up.

It’s just like last summer.

Yeah, you can face this

While Rafe is telling one of his stories, you start to feel a pit of anxiety in your stomach because you know what you have to do.

You’ve gotten ready for this moment, practiced it in the mirror about 50 times to make sure your facial expressions, or your tone doesn’t sound too weird.

You're on your own, kid

“Rafe.” You stop him mid conversation.

“Yes?” he says with a quirk of his eyebrows.

“All these months i’ve been so distant but really all I wanted was to be near you, since last summer you’ve been the only thing on my mind and maybe you don’t feel the same way but-“

He cuts you off with a kiss to your lips.

“I’ve been waiting since the 8th grade for you to say that” He says as he pulls away.

“So all that practicing in the mirror was for nothing?” you giggle.

“Guess so.”

You always have been

200 notes · View notes

longliveao · 2 years

Text

Ultimatum

AgedUp!Neteyam x afab!omaticaya!reader

Warnings: its mostly smut, nsfw, MDNI!!, oral (m receiving), unprotected sex (be careful!)

Summary: Neteyam always scolds you and Lo’ak for your mischief, what happens when you give him a bold ultimatum?

Word Count: 1.8k

Note: I’ve never written on here and I feel like I could’ve done this way better so I’m nervous. My mind is gross asf but I hope you enjoy lol

As Lo’aks best friend, he felt the need to have you come on every single expedition of his. You guys were double trouble, something you had gotten scolded for many times throughout the years. When you were not learning in the healers hut or exploring with kiri, you were off causing mischief with your right hand man. Neteyam hated this, not just because you allowed Lo’ak to drag you into these situations, but because of you in general. You had a habit of teasing him about everything, whether it be mean or sexual. He couldn’t stand you for it. No other woman in the clan would even dare to diss him half as much as you do. The two of you slowly but surely causing him to reach his boiling point. As you stood with Lo’ak in the forest to get lectured by him for the millionth time, Neteyam was nothing short of fuming at your nonchalance. “I swear everything I ever say to the two of you goes in one ear and comes out the other” he said raising his arms in frustration. “Bro its not even that serious for real” Lo’ak said equally tired of this conversation as you were. You kept silent watching them argue, Neteyam can’t argue if you don’t argue back. You and Lo’ak had snuck out of your tents in the middle of the night to go exploring again but Neteyam followed. It’s like he has a radar for when you’re doing something you’re not supposed to be doing. “They could’ve been hurt Lo’ak” Neteyam said strength to his brother. It was true. Right when Neteyam caught up to you two, you had gotten stuck in a tree. A vine was wrapped around your leg and arm, suspending you in the air. Lo’ak only laughed, swiftly cutting you down the moment his brother came into his view. “Why the fuck do you care so much about what we do?”, Lo’ak asked in frustration, “we’re adults now, we can do what we want”. While that was true, we directly disobeyed Jakes curfew order. Neteyam was very over this conversation that they were having at 2am. “Go home” he said to his brother. “Whatever” Lo’ak huffed, walking off into the forest towards High Camp. You turn to follow him, only to be stopped by an arm pulling you back. “Not you”, turning you see Neteyam with that familiar flame of anger lingering in his eyes. You groan loudly at this. His grip on your arms tighten, “watch it”. “Or what?” you ask amused, “you gonna run and tell Daddy how bad I’ve been”. His face hardens at this. “Stop” he says evenly. His arm pulling you closer. At this point you were inches apart, the height difference between you two becoming obvious. “Neteyam” you begin, “you can either fuck me, fight me, or shut the fuck up”. At this, his eyebrows relax and his arm grip falters. Taking this opportunity, you pull your arm from his grasp and walk off towards home. Leaving him as he stood dumbfounded at your sentence.

After the argument in the woods, you had gotten yet another scolding from your Olo’eyktan and Tsahík the next morning. A few days of training went by but a certain someone was nowhere to be seen. Neteyam had taken to avoiding you after what you said in the woods. Honestly, you were used to it. Everytime one of your insults got under his skin, he’d disappear from your life until the next time you and Lo’ak needed to be told off. You found this funny. It was so easy to get under his skin and honestly, his reactions made it so much funnier. You had gone on another forest trip with Kiri a few hours ago. Night had fallen as you made your way out of another healers tent after they had patched up the nasty gash on your bicep. Most, if not all, of the Omaticaya population was asleep already. Taking a peak outside, you swiftly walked towards your own, hoping that Neteyam wouldn’t be awake to notice you. You realized you were not so lucky after you heard the opening to your tent swish behind you. Sighing you turned around to face an angry Neteyam. “What did you do now?” he asked pointing to your arm. “I fell” you said rolling your eyes. “Why are you so careless?” he asks, already frustrated. “If you came here just to yell at me again, you can find your way out jackass” you say turning your back to him, beginning to walk towards your sleeping mat. Suddenly a hand wraps around the front of your neck, yanking you back and turning you around to face neteyam. “wha-“ you exclaim, his hand tightens. “shut up” he says through gritted teeth, pulling you closer. “I’m real tired of that mouth of yours” he growls.

You stare at him in shock. You’ve seen him this angry but this was more than that. You could see another emotion swirling in the gold of his iris’, one you didn’t recognize. Before you could even begin to compose yourself, he smashes his lips against yours. Although you were taken by surprise, you kiss back. The hand on your neck slides up to grip your jaw. He breaks the kiss and tilts your head up to look at him. The emotion in his eyes registers at this point. Pure lust. “Get on your knees” he states firmly. You listen immediately and get on your knees in front of him. From this angle you can see how hard he is in his loincloth as he unties it. “You always have something to say, should’ve shut you up long ago” he mutters as his loincloth hits the floor, his dick slapping his stomach. Gripping it between his fingers, he begins stroking himself. “Open up” he says. Once again, without a word you open your mouth. He rubs his tip on your lips, the salty precum lingers on your tongue before you begin to take him in your mouth. He’s bigger than you thought he’d be. All those nights spent touching yourself at the thought of him led you up to this point. You gag as his dick hits the back of your throat and he groans at the feeling. Gripping your head, he begins to thrust himself into your mouth. You gag as he assaults your throat, hands on his thighs trying to steady yourself. His head falls back, deep, loud groans leaving his mouth. His pace picks up making it harder for you to breathe, tears falling from your eyes. “Isn’t this what you wanted My Love? For me fuck your throat raw?” he teases. You only can only hum in response.

You reach your hand down into your loincloth to circle your clit. A sharp yelp falls from your lips as Neteyam growls, gripping your hair and yanking you away from him. Your throat praises the breaths of air you take in. “Did I say you could touch yourself, slut” he barks, anger clearly evident on his face. “No sir” you mutter, staring at the floor of your tent, still perched on your knees. This seems to ignite something with him. Suddenly, he’s pushing your shoulders for you to lay down. “Mine” he says from on top of you before leaning in to kid you roughly. Your mouths move in sync, his touch pushing past your lips. His hand moves down, untying your top and loincloth as he kisses you. He runs his finger through your labia, up to your swollen clit. He pinches it, causing a moan to slip out and be swallowed by his mouth. Pulling away, he whispers in your ear, “so wet just for me huh baby?”. Leaning back, he positions himself between your legs. You moan as he runs his tip up and down through your folds. He lines himself up at your entrance before leaning down to capture your lips with his once again. He takes advantage of the distraction and pushes himself all the way in with no warning. You yell out in pain. “Shhhh it’s okay” he whispers again your lips, “I’ve got you”. He waits for you to adjust before he begins moving. The stinging slowly turning into deep pleasure, you begin to lift your hips to meet his thrusts. Neteyam takes this as a sign to speed up, pounding into you. His long fingers grip your hips roughly as he plunges himself in and out of your pussy. You can already tell it’s going to leave bruises. His braids fall around his face as he breathes obscenities.

He lifts one of your legs over his shoulder, the new angles causing you to lose your breath. He’s hitting right where you want him too, and he can tell by the moans that leave your lips. You lean forward to press your hand against his abdomen only for him to slap it away. “Move your fucking hand” he growls. “Teyam- too much” you manage out. “Take it” he says speeding up, causing you to throw your head back onto the floor. A familiar feeling builds up, you clench around him. “Gonna cum” you say as the feeling begins to build up, causing your eyes to roll back in your head. “Not yet” he moans. The lewd sound of your hips meeting his echo through the tent. You close your eyes as you try your hardest to hold it in. It’s not long until his strokes turn a little sloppier. He places his thumb on your clit and begins running fast circles. “Neteyam!” you exclaim placing your hand on his as your legs begin to shake. “Cum for me baby” he says, out of breath. With that you allow the feeling of your orgasm to overtake you, eyes rolling back into your head as your vision turns white. The feeling of you clenching around him has Neteyam throwing his head back, pressing himself against your cervix. “Ah fuck” he says as he shoots his load into your womb. His hips stutter as his head falls back once again. Your legs shake as he fills up your overstimulated pussy. He gives a few languid strokes before he’s pulling out. Your head lay back onto the floor, catching your breath. You begin to feel the warm liquid leaking out of you onto the floor. Neteyam sits on his knees in front of you, admiring his work. “We should settle disagreements like this more often” he says smiling, as you cover your face in embarrassment, “don’t get all shy on me now, you’re the one who gave me an ultimatum”. You only sigh as he grabs a cloth and wets it with water before coming to clean you up.

#neteyam #neteyam sully x reader #neteyam sully #avatar #neteyam smut #atwow smut #neteyam oneshot #atwow fanfiction #neteyam x reader smut #avatar smut #avatar 2 #loak x reader #loak

648 notes · View notes

mrs-snape5984 · 5 months

Text

“Oh, breathe, just breathe…”

“'Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable. And life's like an hourglass glued to the table. No one can find the rewind button, girl. So cradle your head in your hands and breathe, just breathe…” (“Breathe (2AM)” by Anna Nalick)

Sometimes, you just have to accept, that there are things, that can’t be changed or fixed anymore…at least not right now. I guess, I’m more and more coming to terms with this insight, considering the fact, that it just doesn’t make sense to wrap my head around the reason for my disease ME/CFS.

I can’t alter my previous decisions. For the past two years, I’ve blamed myself for catching Covid on an Open Air concert of my German favourite punk rock band “Die Ärzte”…especially viewed in the context that I avoided social gatherings since late 2019 because of my medicinal immune suppression. But when I got these tickets as a gift in 2022, my brain must have shut down and I started to belittle the potential risks of catching the virus by telling myself, that I would stand in the back of the crowd, beneath the open sky. This was also the first occasion, when I didn’t wear my mask…after enduring being bullied and mocked for wearing masks everywhere and rejecting every single invitation to parties and simple get-togethers.

Well…only one week later, my life- as I knew it before - came to an abrupt halt. I don’t want to go into detail about my current situation in this post. Whoever knows me and also my prior posts, is probably already fed up with my complaints about ME/CFS and its results for my life.

So, all I can do now, is to breathe. Deliberately slowly…breathing in…and breathing out. Calming my nerves…soothing my troubled mind with my fantasies of Severus and my absolutely self-inserted OC Jules…

I’ve commissioned someone new for this project. Someone different from all those lovely artists of Snapedom, who I regularly contacted for my usual coping mechanism of commissioning artworks of Sevy and Jules.

This time, I reached out to @pinklovecharm, an incredibly kind and understanding artist, who made me speechless with this drawing. I asked her to help my imagination of Severus and Jules, being on a walk in the forest, come to life.

I can’t tell you, how much I’m missing this simple activity of enjoying the autumn sunshine and some fresh air on a walk in the woods. In my fantasy, Severus would apparate us to a secluded path in the middle of the forest, wrapping his arm around my waist to support my steps. We wouldn’t talk much…but Severus would remind me of the importance of breathing…and he would exercise it with me…patiently waiting for me to eventually calm down. He’s my safe haven…my home.

My dear Sadie, you can’t imagine, how much you soothed my soul with your mesmerising art and your kind-heartedness. You really achieved to put me into my OC Jules…with all her emotions and physical attributes….and you even integrated my cane into your drawing! Normally, I don’t show my reference pictures publicly, but I’m too impressed by your dedication to the details of my appearance, that I can’t stop myself from presenting them here. Thank you for everything, you wonderful person! I hope, we’ll stay in touch and that I may commission you again.

🖤Severus & Julia🖤

🖤Sevy and Jules🖤

39 notes · View notes

x-liv25-jamieswife · 24 days

Text

short taylor swift playlists for each tig character - rebecca

another playlist :). we don't know much about her so some of this might not be accurate (some of the songs i added were added because of hcs i have). i wrote this at like 2am last night so some of this might not make sense.

#1: i hate it here: this song is about escapism. its about a person who escapes to this secret world they've created in their mind because they hate this world. there are many reasons why i think this song suits rebecca. for one, i've always imagined her being a reader. it just makes sense to me. i feel like she'd view it as a form of escapism. her home life is clearly not the greatest. she was constantly pushed aside by her parents because of her sister's condition and was forced to take care of emily. i also feel like with everything going on with thea at the time, and her need to lie to her sister to gain her approval, she would want to find ways to escape her life.

#2: the prophecy: the prophecy is about yearning for a different destiny and the hope one has for a better future. rebecca wasn't loved by any of her family, and, based on what we know, she doesn't seem to have many friends. the only person who's ever truly been there for her is xander (i'm not counting thea bc she abandoned her for her sister right before she died). she's always been treated unfairly by others so it would only make sense for her to yearn for a different future and love.

#3: maroon: the song describes a relationship from beginning to end. the song doesn't necessarily fit rebecca (and thea), but the vibes do (as well as some lyrics). the vibes fit them so well it was impossible for me not to add the song.

#4: you're on your own, kid: i think the title of this song is quite self-explanatory. its about realizing that, at the end of the day, you only really have yourself. like i said earlier, she has no friends or family (except for xander) that truly cares about her. she doesn't really have anyone that she can depend on or trust fully.

#5: champagne problems: the song tells the story of a woman who surprises everyone by turning down her lover's marriage proposal. the woman in question turned down the proposal because of her struggles with her mental health. this song isn't an exact fit, but i do think that it fits her well enough. just like the narrator, rebecca struggles with her mental health, and she did turn down thea at first when she asked her out after their break up even though she liked her. the only part that doesn't fit her is the proposal part.

#6: 'tis the damn season: the song is about a woman returning to her hometown during the holidays, where she briefly reconnects with an old lover. the song isn't an exact fit, but it screams thebecca to me. after emily's passing, thea and rebecca broke up, but they never truly let go of the other (especially thea). they were incapable of staying away from each other and being just friends. their feelings for the other never faded away, and i can definitely imagine them sometimes giving into those feelings despite being broken up.

#7: tolerate it: my favorite song in the entire world. it's about wanting to be loved by someone who doesn't even bother paying attention to everything you do for them. i think this is quite self-explanatory. rebecca has always lived in emily's shadow. there was nothing she could do to change that. it got to the point where she started believing she was the problem. even though her loved ones weren't there for her, she was there for them all. i made a full analysis of this song from rebecca's pov a few months ago (here).

#8: evermore (ft. bon iver): the song follows a person's journey from this seemingly never-ending period of sadness and depression to one of optimism. this person says that, without this specific loved one, they wouldn't have made it. by the end of book 3, we can see that rebecca is starting to heal from the trauma and pain her family inflicted on her (she started dressing herself and styling her hair in ways that she liked instead of trying to fit into the mold emily had created for her). i think thea (and xander and maybe even avery) assisted her in beginning her healing process which is why i think this song fits her quite well.

#9: right where you left me: this song is about not being able to move on from an ex. the narrator was left sitting in a restaurant after a break up, and, even after all of these years, she's still there, frozen (mentally). i think this song fits her in two different ways. i think emily's death and the pain her family put her through affected her so badly she was unable to move on and heal. she sort of stayed frozen in time just like the girl in the song. i also think she was unable to move on from thea even though she was the one who broke things off between them. i think the guilt she felt for dating thea behind emily's back and the trauma she was dealing with made her break up with thea (and also maybe she felt betrayed by thea after she chose emily over her), but that doesn't mean her feelings for thea faded away.

#10: mirrorball: the narrator of the song compares themself to a reflective disco ball. they think they reflect other people's personalities to make them happy. rebecca is a people pleaser. she did everything emily and her family asked of her hoping that it would make her worthy of their love. she wanted their approval so bad she forgot she was her own person (in thl (or maybe tig), she literally refers to her hair as 'our hair' as if it's also emily's). all rebecca wants is to be loved, and she's been made to believe that the only way for that to happen is if she molds herself into someone people actually want (cause she thinks no one could want her as she is).

#11: illicit affairs: the song is about the heartbreak and happiness that infidelity can bring. this song doesn't fit her perfectly, but, whenever i listen to it, i think of how thea pretended to be seeing xander while dating rebecca in secret. at the time, this was the only way for the two of them to be together, and although being with thea made her happy, i'm certain she wished she didn't have to keep their relationship a secret. hiding her relationship probably felt like hiding a part of herself.

#12: false god: the song describes the power and pain of loving someone. loving someone obviously doesn't come without challenges. i feel like rebecca would sort of hate herself for loving thea because she's her sister's best friend. they also kept their relationship a secret from everyone because they were afraid of what people would think (they also probably hid their relationship bc they're two girls). all of this obviously wouldn't be easy, but, despite the pain, they still stayed together. i also think the vibes of the song fit them really well.

#13: call it what you want: the song is about not caring what the media has to say about your relationship bc all that matters is that the two of you know the truth. this obviously doesn't apply to them in the first books. they literally hid their relationship from the public because they were afraid of what people would say, but, in book 3, i feel like thea and rebecca stopped caring and just did whtv they wanted. literally no one knew whether they were dating or not, and they didn't seem to feel the need to clarify. i guess that, after starting to heal from their trauma, they sort of realized that other people's opinions don't matter.

#14: all you had to do was stay: the song is about a crumbling relationship that ends because of the lover's indecision. like i said earlier, i think that part of the reason why rebecca broke up with thea is because, the night that emily died, thea picked emily over her even though she knew it would only cause problems. thea was so desperate for emily's approval that she chose her over her girlfriend, and that most definitely hurt rebecca's feelings. maybe, if things had gone differently and thea picked rebecca instead, they would've never broken up.

#15: this love: the song describes the revival of a failed romance. the narrator of the song explains that even though relationships aren't always perfect, they're still worth being in for the good memories they give you. rebecca and thea broke up and then got back together some time later after realizing that they're more miserable apart than they are together. this song fits them perfectly.

#the inheritance games #avery grambs #jameson hawthorne #grayson hawthorne #nash hawthorne #xander hawthorne #libby grambs #rebecca laughlin #rebecca x thea #thea calligaris #emily laughlin

21 notes · View notes

bekaterrier · 3 months

Text

Happy Audio Drama Sunday! I listened to a few things this week (gushing and spoilers ahead):

@woodenovercoats S4: You know it's going to be a good season when it's already got me tearing up in the third episode! Madeline and her family!! 😭 Madeline and Rudyard besties! 🥰 I absolutely loved seeing Antigone continue to grow this season. She just wanted to be seen, to know she was strong enough to be seen, and she was!! We also got to hear Rudyard give more time to his life outside the funeral home, particularly his special interest in history! We finally got Chapman's backstory! Heartbreaking though. 💔 Holy shit that sound design when Chapman and Rudyard go over the falls was *chef's kiss*. My first thought re: the Funns running Chapman's was "Oh lord, how is Rudyard going to F this up?" It was really nice to hear them actually properly put on a funeral like we knew they could. Throughout the season, we heard Eric and Antigone grow closer and some feelings start to develop there. Then hearing Eric calling out for Antigone in his dream was...whew. "Sorry about the chloroform." 😂 Georgie's cycle of grief is so real. It hits you at the most unexpected moments. They're a town!!!! And of course he came back, he's home!!!!! This ending is so perfect, so absolutely satisfying. This show was incredible ♥️

@midstpodcast S1: I've been seeing so much about this show in my feed lately as its third and final season released, so I just had to jump into it. And wow am I hooked! The way the narrators share the story and the character voices between them is fascinating. The world building is absolutely incredible - the visual they painted of the fold sweeping through is just chilling. Combine that with the actual visual elements created by the podcast, seen in the YouTube videos...so so cool. Side note - I hate the Trust; the way that its systems ensure that those at the bottom are kept down, rewarding those already at the top...kudos to another podcast where one of the villains is capitalism. In any case, I was so absorbed in the stories of each of the three protagonists, trying to see ahead to how their lives would intersect, I almost forgot about the very first scene! The moon falls out of the sky!! Absolutely wild!! I'm very much looking forward to learning more about the consequences of this and the impact on Midst.

@midnightburgr Welcome to the Horizon Part 3 - The Wayfaring Stranger: God I love this town and these people. I laughed out loud so many times this episode! Frank and June's reactions to Verge's background are hilarious. I'm so glad we have Verge in this mini-series. It's also so fun to hear them flirting with Deirdre, especially after hearing their VAs as not so friendly in Moonbase Theta, Out (love you Cat and Tina). The news that we get from Trinkett about the comet is verrry interesting and concerning, so looking forward to seeing where that goes.

@tellnotalespod S1 & S2 (to date) re-listen: TNT is currently on their mid season break, so I re-listened to everything that's been released so far. I said earlier this season that it was going to be tough listening to all the S2 episodes in a row since many of them made me cry individually...and I was right! 😭 I am so looking forward to the rest of S2, and I really hope Leo, Riley and Julia all get the hugs they need, preferably from each other.

@storiesfromylelmore Winter Solstice crowdfunding episode: I love hearing the kids out and up to their shenanigans! It was also really sweet to get a glimpse of the parents doing their thing, but also loving all the kids (even though Elas can sometimes be puce). I also loved hearing more about their world's Winter Solstice story! The worldbuilding is so fantastic.

@hinaypod Episode 41 - Danny Boy (Pride Episode 2024): I'm glad I listened to this one during the day because I definitely would have gotten creeped out by some of the curse's descriptions if I'd listened at 2AM, as I sometimes do. We got quite lore dump on our favourite horrible old man, but I still have so many questions!!

#audio drama sunday #audio drama #wooden overcoats #wooden overcoats spoilers #midst podcast #midnight burger #tell no tales #tell no tales podcast #tntpod #stories from ylelmore #hi nay #hi nay podcast #hi nay spoilers #bekaterrier #my jewelry #handmade jewelry #wire knitting #bracelets #podcast piece

13 notes · View notes

smidgen-of-hotboy · 6 months

Text

Out in the Cold Field, pt. iv

I always finish these it seems at 2am. Huh. Now go fetch! @ananxiousgenz @ceaseless-watchers-special-girl @urjover @demonic-panini @one-joe-spoopy @waters-and-the-wilde @the-private-eye

“What do you know about Pandora?”

“Wife to Epimetheus, beautiful, sculpted by the Gods, the perfect lady, had a vase she was told to never shatter, super curious, so she unleashed all the evil in the world… I sense a lesson coming.”

“Pandora did a lot more than just bring evils into the world. Do you know why the Gods made her?”

“Punishment I presume? Everything always harkens back to punishment.”

“She was a punishment from the Gods to man. A God who made humans stole for us fire. They chained him to a rock, and every day a vulture would come and pick at his liver, and every day he would suffer immense pain and regenerate. The Gods made Pandora then to punish humanity.”

“Why would they do that? They knew the culprit, they sorted them out, so why continue and drag it out onto the rest of us? Isn't that some sort of war crime?”

“Today, yes. Back then, there was no such thing.”

“Mmm… I guess that explains a lot of things. Wasn’t there also one good thing left behind? Hope?”

“In some retellings, yes.”

“Mom’s books say there was hope. She circled and underlined it a bunch.”

“And why do you think that is?”

“If the evils were a punishment, and hope was trapped inside the jar with them… the evil things were a message. There is no way to escape, outsmart, outtrick, or outlive the Gods. There is no escape. And hope… can always be there. At the heart of it all. Hope is also a will of the Gods. Just like everything else that was in the vase.”

“Smarter than me, as bright as your mother. Well done, солнышко моё.”

Growing up, Buddy had very few friends her age. The ones she did have were either scared off by Palomine, or scared off by Buddy. It left her an awful lot of time alone. Time that she spent reading and studying. Time that she spent hanging around the countertop of Palomine’s bar, asking the other patrons to share with her one of their stories. And oftentimes he would find her and shoo her upstairs, handing out complimentary drinks as apologies. Occasionally he wouldn't find her and occasionally she got to hear stories beyond her comprehension.

That was how she heard about the Carte Blanche. A regular of her father's came in and sat down at the bar. A younger Buddy Aurinko slid up next to them and talked about Odysseus. She knew the epic as well as the back of her hand but never wrapped her head around it quite right. The regular she sat with however was good conversation and explained it very easily. Their patience for her temper proved something wrong about Palomine.

The regular listened to her like always and laughed in her face when she said that she would have never returned home if she were Odysseus. They asked if she had ever stepped foot on a ship before and offered to show her theirs. Buddy readily agreed.

It was a week-long trek to reach the port they had docked in. And, at the time, the Carte Blanche went by a different name. Its sails were a drab cream color and the bow had a half naked siren strapped to the front. She was hideous. Buddy fell in love instantly.

That regular died suddenly four years later. Their wife found Buddy at the bar and slid to her a will. They wanted you to travel the seas. They hoped that someday you would find your Penelope.

She spent months scraping barnacles off the haul and removing that damn siren from the bow. The sails were the easiest to replace. The days of cream colored past were behind them now. Navy blue sails brought her all around Hellas Basin. The end of an era. The winds were changing and the seasons were rolling into each other as Buddy finished painting her ship's new name, Carte Blanche.

Now she was Captain of her own ship. She left Palomine to take control of her future, to reign in her own destiny, and now here she was. Captain of her own ship, of her own life, her own destiny. Finally out from her father’s reach– except she wasn’t allowed to die. And her life wasn’t hers alone to dictate anymore, not so long as Jet and M’tendere were with her… And Palomine had tried to bargain for his life with hers… And she’s going back to the bar where she left him four months ago.

The voyage to the Cerberus Province was lonely and cold. Buddy had always dreamed of wrangling together a crew of misfits like her and Vespa to sail Hellas Basin with. She dreamed of someday retiring and growing old with Vespa. Getting to sit under their own vine and fig tree. Relaxing in the shade together, at home with the knowledge that they had put their best foot forward. That they had tried to better the lives of people like them, and given their best efforts for someone else’s chance of survival.

On the third night aboard the Blanche, M’tendere sings Buddy and Jet part of a song. They call it their Key.

“It sounds lovely darling.”

“Thank you,” M’tendere strums their guitar a bit more. “If there’s a song you’d like me to play, I will happily play it for you, Captain.”

“Please, call me Buddy.”

“No can do, Captain. Jet and I are guests on your ship. You invited us on board and you’re helping me smuggle fire away from Hadestown. The least I can do is show you a bit of respect.”

On the fifth night, Jet stands at the helm of the ship. One hand planted on the wheel, the other holding the lamp. The fire inside has been burning now for almost two weeks straight. Possibly longer. M’tendere never answers her when she asks how and when they stole the fire.

Speak of the devil, they’re turning out to be pretty bad at the whole sailing thing. Jet is a natural. M’tendere… would have probably faired better taking a month to skirt around Hellas Basin avoiding the road and tracks to Hadestown than ever stepping foot on the Blanche. For now M’tendere has kept to the lower deck. Much darker and damper, they’re starting to develop a cough. Jet doesn’t seem worried, so until he is neither will Buddy.

Buddy slides up next to Jet, two of M’tendere’s scarves wrapped around her throat.

“Your fingers are white.” She glances at Jet and back down at her hands. “Why haven’t you said anything?”

“Why didn’t you ask me sooner? If you knew this whole time, why hold off? If you care so deeply about my health–”

“I didn’t ask because I was waiting for you to mention it. M’tendere said that you would when you were in enough pain.” He pauses, and if it were locked into other season and Buddy any other person, she might have turned a beautiful shade of pink. “I care for your health, Buddy, because you are alone. You are walking a dark path, one that I have beared witness others walk before, and it never ends the way you or they hope.”

She scoffs, “Oh don’t be ridiculous, I’m not like other people. You don’t know the first thing about me. We hardly know each other.”

Jet nods passing off the lamp to her. Buddy accepts it without a second thought and for a brief moment, she thinks she might have caught hint of a smile.

“You’re right, we don’t.”

A long stretch of silence wraps around them. Eventually the pain in Buddy’s joints makes itself known. She bids Jet a fair night and descends to the lower deck to join M’tendere. They greet her with a cough and refuse to accept the lamp. For the rest of the night Buddy keeps it close to warm her hands.

On the ninth day, the seas are rough tossing the Blanche around. Buddy steers, while Jet stands on the bow keeping an eye out for rocks.

That night it’s calm enough that M’tendere joins them above deck. They play a few songs intermittently asking Buddy questions in between. It strikes her at some point that while it’s a game to her, it’s a dance to them.

“How long have you been sailing?”

“Only a few years. How long have you and Jet been traveling together?”

“We travel separately most of the time. You got found at a very lucky and rare time when we’re stuck together.”

“M’tendere asked me to help them fulfill their dream.”

“Oh really? And what is your dream?”

M’tendere sighs and leans back against the mast. Their head tilts at an awkward angle searching for constellations in the sky. “I wanted to help people. Balance out all the bad things that I’ve done in the name of Hades.”

So you stole fire goes unsaid. Just like Promethus.

“What is your dream, Buddy?” She looks up at Jet, who again has claimed his spot at the helm. Her damn ship that half the time she doesn’t even get to man anymore.

“My dream?” She chuckles, “I wanted to help people. Give back, uplift, and empower. But that time has come to pass now. What’s done is done they say… What is your dream, Jet? Don’t suppose it’s also to help people?”

“How disappointed would you be if I said it is?” This time, she does get to watch him smile. It’s bright and glorious and could fill up a whole room. And when Buddy laughs, M’tendere does too. They break into a coughing fit that lasts longer than usual. Again, Jet does not seem concerned. Despite this, Buddy tries not to either. M’tendere plays a final song that night, Their Key, and heads down to rest.

In the morning there is a thick sheet of ice that formed on the bow. Buddy takes a crack at it using part of an old rusted anchor. She instructed Jet to search for an ice pick in the cargo hold. M’tendere hasn’t moved a muscle. It’s fine. Just four more days. They can rest.

Jet emerges from the belly of the beast. Buddy steps aside to allow him to take over.

The voyage to the Cerberus Province was lonely and cold. Had she not died somehow without Jet or M’tendere’s aid, the return trip back would’ve been no different. It would have been harder. It would have been colder. She might have actually died.

“Jet,” he stops mid-swing to look back at her, “ask me again. Ask me again why I want to die.”

He turns towards her, rolling his shoulders back, standing at full height. Grimly, she is reminded of depictions of psychopomps in her mother’s old texts. Shadowy figures that slip on billowing robes. Some with animal heads. Others so handsome and flawless that they had to be immortal. But when she blinks the winter sun bathes Jet in cool light. Chasing away the shadows on Jet’s face, bringing into focus his heavy leather winter coat. Scars his hands remind her that he bleeds too.

“Buddy Aurinko.” She takes a deep breath. The voyage was to the Cerberus Province was cold and lonely… “What happened to make you want to die?”

They say it took Odysseus 20 years to journey home. 10 years fighting the Trojans, and 10 years lost at sea. When he returned home, he returned in disguise to win his wife’s hand in marriage and scare off the competition. He accomplished a little more than that, but he had his wife. He got back his Penelope.

The voyage to the Cerberus Province was cold because it shouldn’t have been made alone. Odysseus fought and won the war. Odysseus got to go home to be with the one he loved. Buddy Aurinko, wouldn’t even get so much as a final goodbye.

“I lost someone. I lost– I lost Vespa. I lost her and my dream and I can’t bear a life without her.” She wipes the stinging tears from here eyes. She turns her back and walks away. Not once did she let Palomine see her cry, Vespa only saw her cry in joy, and she wasn’t about to start sobbing a second time in front of Jet.

Buddy plants herself at the helm and watches Jet resume chipping away at the ice. Just four more days. Just four more days.

That night she sits with M’tendere on the lowest deck. The scarves they loaned to her are rolled up tight to support their neck. They wheeze with each breath. In the relative quiet, she tries to think back to what Vespa would do. What Vespa would say.

“Goddess hands, guide me.” She mutters under her breath as she clasps M’tendere’s thin wrist to count their heartbeat. There has to be something. Anything. If Vespa were here she would know what to do and how to treat them. She would probably say something like… like…

Vespa’s voice is slipping from her mind. Goddess forgive her. What would go next? Her face? Her touch? Rough lips on soft skin. Green has never been her color but it always belonged to Vespa.

"Captain," Buddy does not flinch as M'tendere's body seizes into a coughing fit. The end is near. Death approaches. She has always hated goodbyes, and loathed letting go. How could she when all the people she lets herself love die in the end? She refuses to believe it, wants to object like Jet did. You can’t be dying yet, we have four more days until we dock.

She swallows a lump forming in her throat and nods. "Keep your strength. I'll fetch Jet." She pats M'tendere's cheek and heads up to the main deck of the Carte Blanche. They have at most four more days until they can dock at the harbor. And another week maybe before a doctor can come. Just four more. Four more and one week… They don't have a week though. Or four more days.

"Jet," Buddy finds him again chipping ice off the bow. He looks up. It's hard to read his expression buried underneath all his layers. "It's M’tendere." He nods and goes to her office to retrieve M'tendere's precious instrument.

When he makes it to their bedside, Buddy has them propped up by every linen blanket and wool stuffed pillow they have on board. Jet offers the instrument but they shake their head. M'tendere has never refused to play them a song. They promised they always would. I’ll happily play it for you, Captain. Nothing would make her happier now than to hear their strong voice.

"I have one last one for the road." They suppress a cough and wipe blood from the corner of their mouth. "My Key."

Once upon a time M'tendere's voice used to lull Buddy to sleep. The voice of an angel. And now, wrecked by disease, it's little more than a frogs croak. She surprises herself still able to recall what that sounds like.

M'tendere sings and hums a quiet peaceful tune. Tears roll freely down Buddy's cheeks. She never allowed her father to see her cry. She would move mountains though to allow M'tendere to see her cry another day.

A second voice picks up the tune. Quieter, deeper. She glances at Jet and finds him plucking the strings of M'tendere's guitar. Finding the right chords. They point and smile when he gets it right.

Four days later, Jet and Buddy Aurinko dock on the other side of Hellas Basin. A snowstorm picks up keeping them cooped on board the Carte Blanche for another week with a decaying corpse. Neither of them speaks much, not even a whistled tune.

The town they docked in is on the outskirts of Hyperion City. A couple of days worth of travel through the snow and they’ll reach Palomine’s bar soon enough. For now, Buddy takes down her navy blue sails and sells them for a quick cred. With that money, she rents them a small room on land to stay in. The whole time she keeps M’tendere’s little fire clutched close to her chest. Humming their key.

#ask to be tagged or removed #i am sleeby #BUT ALSO THIS MEANS IM FREE TO GO BACK AND WRITE MORE OUR ANGEL OF BRAHMA #but also also this means i gotta write and publish the VesBud portion of the Hadestown prequel sighhhh #well. i feel like i got smth done at least #the penumbra podcast #the penumbra fanfic #private eye's keys go jingle jangle #a hotboy's writing #out in the cold field #unedited. just finished it and went straight to posting #NIGHTY

10 notes · View notes

noisymutantherelol · 4 months

Text

" Oh Dear........."

(TW:ANGST,GORE,BRATTY EX,A FLUFFY ENDING,TORTURE,OOC,GIRLBOSS YING)

Kaiju An exited the Dream Domain and started heading back home.It was late very late so Kaiju needed to get home before her mother started to worry and as she was walking back home she noticed a weird person following her,at first she thought she was tripping but she wasn't as the guy continued to follow her she made a turn into a alleyway and hid behind a dumpster,the guy walked in and looked around he took off his hood as he started to complain, "Dammit,I lost them.......", he said as he left the alleyway,'WHY IS MY MOMS EX FOLLOWING ME-' ,she thought as she walked out from behind the dumpster and then everything went black the last thing she heard before she passed out was, " Gotcha ".

(Third person POV)

' Everything is dark,I feel limb and i'm really dizzy what happened?'.........then it hit her,' am I being kidnapped!?! ',Kaiju opens her eyes lazily as she looks around and the first person i sees him," good,your awake now you can help me. ", he said as he grabbed a chair, " What do you want.... ",Kaiju glared at him as he sat down on the chair," Important things that requires your magic......and blood but I know you will do those things willingly....wither you like it or not...",Kaiju was filled with rage and decided to use those words Macaque taught her, " YOU F-CKING B-TCH WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE TRAPPING THE GUARDIAN OF DREAMS AND THE- ",She was cut off by Dong grabbing her by the neck and choking her almost killing her, " YOUR TITLE MEANS NOTHING TO ME........YOU MAY HAVE STRONG AND POWERFUL FEATS IT'S NOTHING COMPARED TO ME....", he let go of her he looks at her in annoyance,Kaiju was taking multiple deep breaths as she gathered breath for her lungs," You are nothing more than a sheer tool for my fame " he said as he injected a potion into her making her fall asleep. then a certain monkey went to go alert the mother.

{WITH YING}

"When is she coming back......" , Ying said to herself it was 2am and Kaiju hasn't came back yet making dear Ying worried as its been 4 hours straight.... Knock knock Ying freaking dashes for the door hoping it her daughter but opens it to see everyone's favorite hot topic monkey,Macaque," YING-,don't close the door on me........it's about Kaiju ",Ying creaked the door open to see the monkey man and bluntly tells him," tell me everything......."

{BACK TO KAIJU}

she woke up after having a terrible dream of times when her life was crap and got interrupted by Dong harshly grabbing her and throwing her harshly on the floor , "So.........tell me ", he said as he walked towards Kaiju An in her weakened state , " Where is the Medalent? " he asked as he towered over her," I'm....n-not telling you anything you bitch-",that seemed to in rage as he kicked Kaiju in the stomach sending her to crash against the wall, " TELL ME NOW ",He yelled he was slowly losing his composer," No... ", That made him even more mad,He grabbed Kaiju by the tail and threw her against a table breaking it," OW- " ,this continued for 19 minutes straight,he was ruthlessly beating her up,Kaiju An was terribly beat up,sore,bleeding and she had a few scars,she saw Dong walking up to her but then.....SMASH Kaiju An saw flashes of light and dark purple before passing out.

{WITH YING AND MACAQUE}

Ying was choking Dong,her eyes filled with rage she was not about to leave this place without letting him have it,she was punching him relentless of the blood being splattered on her face.Macaque went to retrieve Kaiju Ann and was horrified at her state," oh kid.............. ",he examined all the scars and saw how terribly beat up she was and her ear and right hind leg where in a Terrible conditions," Ying! I got-.......",he saw Ying on her knees with her covered in blood,and Dong beat up and half of his face ripped off he is just lying there bleeding Macaque used his shadow portals to teleport's all three of them back to Ying's House," Ying....Ying? It's gonna be ok... ",he pulled her close to him embracing her,even if she has bloodstained clothes," Kaiju is gonna be alright....... ",Ying pulled away from Macaques hug and went to go find the first aid kit but she used up all the supplies so she went to text Sandy if he could help out

Sandy? yeah? Can you come over? Kaiju An needs help

o Ofc! on my way rn

thanks

(time skip cuz I'm lazy)

" I'm here! "

PT.2 soon.....

@yingjiaoyue

#lmk x oc #lmk oc x canon #lmk angst #lmk macaque

14 notes · View notes

cupoftaae · 1 year

Text

Forever And A Day (KTH x READER) series ♡ fondness (chapter 16)

Summary: your lifelong friend is forced to face his true feelings for you once he breaks the number one rule of becoming friends with benefits: dont fall in love. He knows he loves you, but you on the other hand need more convincing of the most important thing: the right decision.

Genre: fwb. Roommates, friends to idiots to lovers, fluff, angst, smut, the whole 9 yards tbh.

Pairing: taehyung x female!reader

rating: 18+ (minors dni!!!)

word count- 5-6k

warnings- swearing, mentions of miscarriage, tae is sad sad, kaito is back, drinking, um i think thats all? lmk if not!

a/n- Lovies!! hi i hope ur all doing good. Im trying to write a lot more because i literally just quit my current job (they treated me like shit) after 2 months. Im applying to so many places rn but in the meantime im having fun giving my tumblr a little luv <3 also apologies for any mispellings, I had read over my previous chapters and cringed at some of the words I spelled wrong. I have been learning english for years now but apparently its still not to a 100, oh well! Anyways, please enjoy! -Nini <3

"I had my suspicions"

You blushed, eyes down on your water bottle as you sat in your childhood bed again, your mother sat comfortable at the end of it as you both talked.

You arrived back home around 2am yesterday, and to say that you already felt a little better was an understatement.

"you did?" you mumbled as your mother nodded, smiling.

"when you came to visit a while ago, I saw a lot of touchiness" she giggled "but I minded my business"

"ah this is embarrassing" your hands flew to cover your face, now knowing your own mother knew about your relationship before you could say anything.

"no, I dont think so" she hummed, looking at the carpet. "I just know when a boy is in love, i remember your father-"

you inhaled sharply at her words, biting your lip and looking away.

"-...he would always look at me like I was the center of the universe"

You stayed quite for a moment before speaking up softly, "what happened?"

She smiled sadly, "he chose a different life, and I resented him for so long, but I accept it for what it was, and now that I have..I feel like im free to live again. And thats what you need to do, accept it, accept whats happened." she whispered, calming voice infiltrating the bedroom at such a late hour of the night.

Your eyes met hers, a glimmer of love was bright enough to see through her dark brown orbs. You nodded as she began to speak again,

"Taehyung and you.....I always knew it would happen" she giggled, "I remember once you guys hit middle school, and the moment I caught you sneaking into my closet for makeup before he came over to play video games-"

"oh god, stop" you blush, shaking your head

"it was cute even if you wouldnt admit it" your mother waved her arm at you.

You hummed, crossing your arms over your chest as you got lost in thought.

"so, how is he taking everything?"

"taehyung?"

she nods, eyes burning a laser into yours.

"well...i dont know" your answer was honest as she sat up.

"what do you mean?"

You sighed once more before speaking, "he and I kinda argued before I left paris...im an asshole mom" you offered a sad laugh, looking down. "im an asshole...because, I got mad at him for trying to help"

She tilted her head, listening, "Im sure he just wanted to be there for you, he was hurting as much as you"

"i know, and thats the thing mama...but I just needed to be alone and away....and he got mad when I expressed it...its not like we are married" you roll your eyes

she giggles, "I understand my dove, but listen" she grabbed your hands, "things like this happen all the time, we cant run away from our loved ones when life gets bad. What happened between you both was terrible, and im so sorry sweetheart" she whispered, your own eyes getting a bit misty, "but running back home isnt gonna do anything"

You nodded before smiling, "I came here because its comforting, you're comforting.....now you're scolding me?" your voice had humor.

She laughed, "you are a 23 year old woman, I cant control your actions, like whether you stayed with Taehyung or came back to me, however I can tell you my opinion, and if your decision was right or wrong, not trying to guilt you, just being a mom"

You nod slowly, fidgeting with the heating pad sitting on your stomach to help ease the lasting cramps that only served as a painful reminder.

"you make your own choices hun, but...let me ask you this, do you love him?" she whispered

Your eyes shot up at her, your heart singing with sadness yet love.

"....yeah.." you whispered so quietly it was barley heard. "yeah I do" you couldnt help but begin to cry as she wrapped you into her arms.

A mothers loving embrace.

It could heal all, and this is exactly why you came back.

"You find comfort here, but as you get older, you need to find comfort in new things." your mother began, " life is scary, but its all about changing. Without change, life would be rather boring, huh?" her hands ran up and down your back as your face rested on her shoulder. "Taehyung has been here forever, youve grown together, but these new feelings? they offer new experiences,...amazing ones too. Im sure he loves you just as much, thats why he let you go..." she whispered, "but my dear, you have to fight through the darkness to find the prize, to find why you had the connection at all"

You were full on Niagara falls into your mothers sweater. Her words provided insight, but as well as pain. You shouldnt have left him behind, it was wrong, and you hoped he understood.

you realized that you were your fathers daughter, and not just in DNA. Your first instinct was to run away from your loved ones, run away from family when they would give you everything.

You were becoming your father.

And you hated how much you still loved that man even if he left you. and you hate that you take after him in such painful ways.

But most of all...you hate how you didn't even see it happening.

"shh" your mother cooed, holding you as she rocked back and forth slowly. "my child, life will settle, but you need to find your way, and if thats with him, you need to tell him"

"i know" you whispered, wiping your eyes as you clutched the tiny bear you packed.

The bear.

Fuck, you wish you didnt bring it in your suitecase.

It was the teddy bear taehyung bought the day after finding out you were pregnant, The perfectly placed initial on the middle that always made you remember he thought of you as a Kim, as well, even if you werent married.

It was a reminder he wanted you in any way he could grasp you.

As a girlfriend, a mother to his child, eventually a wife, but always....always his best friend in life.

Your mother looked down at the bear, smiling. "y/n..."

"hm?" you mumbled, leaning back as she put your hair behind your ears.

"im so sorry this happened to you" her voice was quiet again, "you would have been a beautiful mother....and if you decide to have kids in the future, thats exactly what youll be"

You nod sadly, "thank you...."

It was quiet for a moment before she spoke up again, "when I was in my twenties, your father and I decided to try and have another child..we saw how you clung to your pre-school friends and called them your sisters" she chuckled "so we thought maybe another baby would be good. Well- I got pregnant right before your 4th birthday" her voice choked softly as you watched, this being news to you.

"unfortunately I, too, had lost it" she teared up explaining the situation. "it was one of the most painful things I ever went through....but looking back at it" she smiled at you gently, rubbing your back, "im so greatful"

"grateful?" you whispered, in shock

"I had you, my little best friend whos always stuck by me even in the worse situations...you never had to fight for my attention, we were always together"

You wiped her tears as you smiled sadly, agreeing.

"and you have always been more than enough." she mumbled, "so my love, I guess the lesson here is...that once you learn to accept it and know the situation for what it is.....you'll heal"

You hugged her tightly as her words struck your chest with a great force.

She was right, whether you liked her advice or not, shes been through exactly what you have, and if she can make it out and be such a wise, resilient woman today, than you can too.

But you'll be damned if its in the steps of your father.

Later after she went to bed, you were left alone, the covers up to your neck as the tv played some old school tv show that only got airtime in the late hours of the night.

You found your hand resting on top of your stomach as you laid calmly. You had to acknowledge it to get past it. "im not pregnant anymore..." you whispered, feeling an overwhelming sadness fulfill you. Your eyes drew down to your hand as you rubbed your stomach, feeling a bit stupid at what you were doing.

taking a few deep breathes, you opened your eyes and looked up at the ceiling, "its okay to be sad....its okay to cry" you remind yourself aloud, voice quiet and shaky, "but I can heal....its not my fault" you nod, tears falling for the millionth time within the past few days.

You were exhausted, mentally and physically, but after tonight you feel like perhaps you made a breakthrough, you were proud of yourself even if it was just a baby step.

You turned over in bed to look at your phone, the time was 3:55 am, yikes.

You barley had time to register it before the lock screen caught your attention, now all you could think about is how Taehyung was feeling.

"why are you already back?"

"dude just give me my fish and dog so I can go" Taehyung mumbled, standing at the front of his friend Jin's apartment.

He laughed and turned away for a moment before returning with Hae swimming around in his tiny tank, the packet of food wedged underneath jins chin. "here"

Taehyung took the bowl and the food, nodding "thanks..."

"mhm" he smiled, "so wheres Y/N? The last thing you posted was a photo of her standing on the edge of some fountain, did you push her into it?" he snorted, trying to be light hearted with his friend.

"no shes just, busy I guess" he shrugged, trying to leave quickly, "wheres yeontan?"

Jin looked behind him and picked up the small dog, putting the leash on him securely before handing it to taehyung, who took it with his free hand.

"thanks for not killing my pets and taking care of them, even if it was probably Stephanie who did everything" taehyung referred to Jin's wife, who stood behind him with a wide grin of acknowledgment. "i'll see ya" he nodded before turning down the hall to leave, Yeontan leading the way on his leash.

Taehyung walked on the sidewalk, his feet finding the familiar path to his own apartment.

He left Paris a day and half after you did, only communicating with you through occasional texts that left much to the imagination when it came to how you were doing.

He unlocked the door and walked in, wincing at how messy you two left it before leaving. His hands gently put Hae down on the kitchen counter as he began to pick laundry up, tossing them into a ball and making a mental note to do a washing load this weekend.

Tae checked his phone for any sign of you, frowning when he was met with 0 notifications.

Would it be wrong to call you? he didnt know anymore, things felt awkward...you left with no closure or definitive answer on what was okay or what crossed the boundaries.

It definitely felt uneasy being alone in the apartment, he missed your loud laughing, and the good food you always made for him.

He even missed when you would force him to watch shitty reality shows with you because it meant he got to cuddle with you on the couch for a few hours.

The rumbling sound of his stomach knocked him out of his head as he turned to the kitchen. There wasnt much, other than a few now rotten bananas sitting on the counter.

His hand gripped the fridge handle as his eyes were met with an ultrasound photo hung up by a hello kitty magnet, it felt like salt was poured into his wound...his hand slid off the handle. he wasnt hungry anymore.

Beside the photo was doctors reports hung up for upcoming appointments and reminders.

This upcoming weekend was supposed to be the gender reveal. Deep down Taehyung didnt care if it was a boy or girl, but not that he'd be having neither, it felt more upsetting.

It was a reminder of something that he might never get to experience with you.

He found his way to the kitchen counter, sitting in the quiet room as yeontans tiny pitter-patter paws echoed through the apartment wood flooring.

Taehyungs eyes were drawn to hae, the tiny yellow fish swimming around in his spongebob tank, a toy pineapple placed perfectly in the center for him. For some reason he teared up.

suddenly he felt the urge to hear from you, but he felt selfish for doing so. You should be the one to reach out, right?

He didnt know anymore.

"oh hae....I miss mama" he sighed, leaning down to rest his head in his crossed arms over the table.

"are you gonna just sit in bed?" your mothers voice echoed into your room, the lights were off and the curtains were closed as two large blankets covered your body....it was noon.

"I'll get out soon"

She shook her head, leaning against the door frame "Hun, I need to go shopping, I need to know you are up and alive before I leave you here alone"

Reluctantly you sat up, wiping your sleepy eyes as nostalgia from high school mornings hit you.

"there she is!" your mom cheered, directing her cat to follow over to you as she turned to leave.

You smiled at it as you stretch, "hi baby" your voice cooed before turning over and unhooking your phone from the charger

2 notifications

"oh" you mumbled, quickly unlocking it and going to your texts. You wish it was Taehyung, unfortunately it wasnt...

Kaito: hey, I know this is sort of inappropriate to text you like this, I get it, but I cannot stop thinking about you. I cant stop thinking about the baby. Can we please talk about maybe getting a paternity test?

you frowned, petting the cat as she climbed into your lap

kaito: and I know btw that you dont want me to be the father figure, which is fine. Ive taken time to understand that...however i need to know if its mine, I cant live without knowing y/n. please call or text.

Oh thats just great, another person you had to break the news to.

Your mother came back down the hall, knocking on the door frame "so are you coming or not? im leaving" she smiled

"I'll stay here, thanks though mama, hows your back?"

She waved her hand in dismissal "oh im fine honey, I got my brace"

You smiled sympathetically as she turned to leave, knowing she was probably lying about the pain.

Shes always been stubborn, thats where you get it from.

After getting cleaned up a bit, you made your way outside to sit on the front deck, propping your phone up as you sit in the rocking chair. Were you really about to facetime Kaito?

....guess so...

After a few rings, you began to feel the tightness in your chest...the anticipation...the nervousness...

"hello?" his voice echoed through your ears, for some odd reason you felt like crying already.

"hey....are you at work?"

"on break" he smiled softly, eyes looking into yours through the phone screen. It felt odd to sit here on call with him, you havent done it since you both had been dating.

"so..."

He sat down, propping the phone up against a wall as he watched you, making it clear he was ready to talk. "listen, please understand this isnt me trying to make my way back into your life"

You nod, picking at the skin around your fingernails.

"I just want to know if its mine is all, I mean, I figured theres a chance it is, no? so this is warranted right? i dont want to seem pushy...."

You sigh, looking at him, "um, well I called you because I wanted to discuss everything"

"what do you mean?" his head tilted softly

"kaito, I uh, I lost the baby" you said aloud, nodding as you did so. In some way, the words left your mouth a lot easier than just a few days prior.

You were knee-deep in the healing process

"oh." was all he responded, his face appearing confused and unsure, "you lost the...baby?"

"miscarriage" you add, "it happened a few days ago, I never had the chance to tell whether it was yours or taehyungs"

He frowned, "y/n, im sorry"

"dont apologize its fine, im fine"

"god...."he ran his hands over his face, obviously deeply upset by the news.

"its okay" you assured again as he watched you for a moment,

"do you think it was mine? genuinely?" he whispered

You shrugged, eyes dragging away from the screen to look at the cars driving past the house "I dont know"

You did, you were 90% sure it was taehyungs, this was decided last night as you carefully calculated the dates between periods, and the breakup vs when you and taehyung got together.

If it was kaitos, that would have meant you were close to being 5-6 months pregnant, and at the time of the miscarriage, you were about 3-4.

regardless, it was still upsetting, and in hindsight, it didnt matter anymore especially when you had to sit and break everything down to your ex.

He sighed again, "how are you managing?" he whispered

"im good, im at my moms house right now"

"wheres taehyung?"

you scoffed slightly, even after telling him the situation he only cared about you and taehyung. "Kaito I called to inform you about the baby and the baby alone, we dont need to discuss my personal life, you dont get to know information that no longer involves you"

He sat watching you for a moment before nodding "okay....sorry?"

"thank you for being understanding during this, and all I ask is that you continue to be respectful to not only me, but taehyung"

He rolled his eyes slightly "okay"

"okay" you repeated, sitting near the phone, "well...thats all I suppose, text me if you have more to discuss on the topic, have a good shift"

with that, you hung up and couldnt help the slight smile that popped up on your face, you finally stuck up for yourself, and taehyung

It felt good.

so good that you almost called taehyung out of instinct.

would he be okay with that?

you decided against it, putting your phone away as you sat back and swayed in the rocking chair.

Taehyung gently creaked open the door of what used to be his bedroom, but was now reserved in the space of a future nursery.

He hadnt been in here in a while, and now as he sets his eyes on it all, he wishes he didnt walk in.

There were boxes of items you ordered online piled up in the corner, he smiled sadly and looked through them.

The crib you bought, he promised he would put it together for you, you were never good at building things, instructions or not.

The thought made him giggle softly as he looked at the other things, the vanity and picture frames. The familiar grief found its way into his chest as he went over and laid on the rug in the center of the room.

It was a lilac purple rug, you picked it out and decided the nursery will be just that color scheme, regardless if it was a girl or not. His fingers weaved through it as he began to cry, eyes scanning over the room that will forever be empty, items put to waste. The small bundle of baby toys that never get to be played with.

He never realized just how much he was hurting, but he had to say not having you at his side made it sting even more.

Yeontan nudged his way into the room and grabbed one of the stuffies, making his skilled exit quickly as taehyung got up

"hey! thats not yours!" he frowned and chased out of the room after the small dog, following him around the living room before running into your room. He gave up and dropped the giraffe by your desk, his tiny legs leading him away to hide.

Taehyung kneeled to pick it up, unable to help the way his eyes scanned over the items on top of your desk.

Unorganized homework for school, binders left open and messy, he smiled a bit at it as he walked over, his arm accidentally pushing some of the books off the side.

"shit" he sighed, leaning down to pick them up.

There was a smaller brown notebook that caught his attention, he didnt want to snoop around your things, but when the front of it says "to my love", its pretty hard to ignore.

He carefully sat on the ground and opened it, feeling wrong for doing so but unable to stop.

The first page was full of your handwriting.

May 11th

so...today I just found out the biggest news of my life. im pregnant, its weird to even write. I just bought this notebook at the flea market because I need to tell someone. Im really scared, and im unsure of what you will think of me. I love you a lot, and I hope I get the chance to gift this to you after all is said and done

suddenly he felt like he was doing something wrong, reading something forbidden.

He scanned over the next page quickly, seeing how you spoke about dedicating this as a future love note for him, a chance to let him see inside your mind.

He tossed it back on top of your desk and sighed softly, he missed you so much and it seems like every second only let that feeling grow.

He wasnt sure what position you two were in, but he loved you dearly, probably a lot more than a person should love another human being.

He hoped you felt the same deep and burning desire.

Thoughts passed into his brain, he realized he was grateful you went through the crazy process of the past few years, in which referred to the friends with benefits situation.

If it never happened, you would have never been this close now.

Little does he know, that miles away from Busan, you laid on the floor of your room too, looking over older texts between the two of you and giggling

even if it was about groceries, or a small message asking him to pick you up from class, it made you smile.

Taehyung and your mom have been the only ones that you can say have never left you, the only ones who are there when you need them.

were you going to let him go over something that can be talked over and fixed?

you looked out the window and silently spoke,

"i'll see you soon”

Going back to your old doctor in Gwangju was an odd experience, you had too have been no older than 18 the last time you visited her.

“It seems that everything is going smoothly, and you said you’ve stopped bleeding?”

You nod, fidgeting with the gown you put on as the doctor wrote down everything.

“Your tests seem good, i would say you are coming along healthily after this, which is a good thing, right?” She smiles cheerfully, “do you have any questions for me?”

You shrug, looking up at her “I don’t really know”

She sighed and sat down “y/n, what you went through would be hard on anyone. You are so young and you already are stressed with work and college, and this being thrown on top had to have been difficult right?”

You nod, resting your head in your palm.

“Do you think seeing a therapist would be helpful to you?” She asked sweetly

You quickly sat up “well…im going back to Busan eventually and-”

“I can contact your doctor in Busan and have them find you a therapist”

You sighed deeply, therapy was something you never really considered. Would it help? Maybe. But bottom line was that you never liked discussing your problems, you have always been closed off and the thought of being vulnerable with some stranger is terrifying.

“Look y/n, I’ll send your doctor a note and you can discuss it with her once you go back, how about that?”

You nod reluctantly “okay….”

Once you arrived back with your mother at the house, she began to cook something up for lunch as you laid on the couch, cuddling the cat.

She purred in your lap, making you smile.

"how was the appointment?" your mom spoke from the kitchen, peaking over to you as her hands chopped veggies up on a cutting board.

"well...It was fine I suppose"

"just fine?" she smiled, adjusting her glasses, "did she say anything bad?"

"no, no, nothing bad, but just...she wants me to do this therapy thing and I just-"

"oh that sounds like a good plan...I think therapy would be beneficial"

You sigh, looking down at the cat, "well I probably wont be doing it so..yeah"

She stopped cutting, looking over at you "and why is that?"

You simply shrug in reply

"you know theres nothing wrong in getting help...right?"

"yeah but im not sure im ready to go talk to someone yet"

She laughed softly, "thats when you should talk to someone, when you are unsure, get it out before its all locked up"

sitting up a bit, you look back at her, "I guess, I dont know, we will see...."

Your eyes returned back to the tv in front of you as your mother continued to create a meal for the two of you. As a mom, she felt defeated, she knew the other alternative here but knowing you, the reaction may be less than ideal.

The last thing she wants to do is interfere with your current situation, but hey.....

what is a mom if she isn't nosey?

taglist!-

@turnthepageandbeburnt @taebangtanbabe @borahaexoxo @lelefoodlover @tan-veee

35 notes · View notes