#i know a lot of this debate is just people talking past each other

[northopalshore]

🌸 Composite chart observations: romantic relationships 🪼 ♡ 🪼

‿︵‿‿︵‿‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵‿︵‿‿︵‿

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In this post, I will be writing down some observations I made in composite charts between romantic partnerships. ***Contains mentions of s*x***

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Aquarius (8° scorpio) rising/uranus in 1st house

Both of you are very comfortable with each other in the sense that you have found your best friend as well as a lover! People will often think you aren't a couple or even each other's type but what they don't know is that you love each other more than anyone/anything else in the world. You might surprise a lot of people, perhaps you come from starkly different backgrounds but somehow, you are together! You both will feel understood in the relationship. It gives me that 'us against the world type' type of vibe.

note: if you have aquarius rising & uranus in the 1st house together, then you may as well act very touchy, close or romantic in public because uranus in aquarius is like rebelling the rebel so to speak. You will not act like the sign you have in the 1st house if you have uranus there i.e changing the norm of how it usually is. Aquarius here becomes softer, emotional & clingy .

9th house stellium

The focus of your relationship is learning & growth. Both of you expand each other's horizons in the relationship. Your relationship could open many doors in your life. You may come from different countries, and are constantly sharing your thoughts, perspectives and philosophies with your person. You will love to talk & have debates in your relationship. You will love to travel together, your relationship could involve you having to travel a lot. You will both teach each other many new things. You could also act like teachers to the world/be actual teachers.

Part of fortune in the 8th house

You will most likely be together for a very long time i.e get married! You will both help each other heal from past trauma or fears. This is a very healing relationship. You might also receive a lot of wealth together. You will transform each other in this relationship. Whoever you were before this person will completely change after being in this relationship.

Pluto conjunct ascendant

Your entire identity will change in this relationship. You will never be the same person you once were. You could seem like a very intense, obsessive, possessive & s*xual couple.

Moon (29° leo) in 5th house

Both of you will have a lot of fun in the relationship. A lot of romance, spontaneous dates, creativity will prosper. You may feel like kids in love, a youthful romance. You could also focus a lot of your energy & feelings towards art. Perhaps you'll collaborate on something? Children could also be involved, both of you will love the idea of having kids together. S*x can be very playful and emotional. You will feel very connected to eachother during the act. You could also.. prefer to not use protection.

Fama in 1st/7th house

You could be a very popular couple, people will notice you more when you are together. People will know you as "Your person's partner". People will look up to your relationship and how you act together.

10th house stellium

A lot of your focus can go to your career in your relationship. You could very much work with your partner. You will be a very popular couple. Your relationship is very public. It could borderline a work relationship too. A power couple.

Neptune conjunct ascendant

You could very much prefer to keep your relationship private. You will both deliberately make efforts to keep the things that happen within your relationship just between each other.

Groom sextile MC

The relationship might benefit the husband/man in their career. Their work plays an important role in your relationship. They could be very career oriented/ have a public presence. They could also be very prideful of your relationship. Your relationship will boost their reputation in a way.

Briede in 4th house

The wife/woman may be a stay at home wife. They could focus a lot of their energy into homemaking, taking care of children, cooking etc.

Boda trine sun

If they are married, they had a very public wedding. Their wedding may be very well-known within their family i.e standing out from the rest of their family's previous marriages. Iconic wedding. They will both see each other as marriage material.

Boda trine moon

Their wedding may have been very memorable to them as well as their family members. There could have been a lot of crying during the ceremony. Both parties felt very connected to each other.

Boda in 1st house

They may have/will marry quite quickly. Both of you couldn't wait to get married, either that or you had to get married quickly i.e to catch a certain date you like/brings prosperity. The wedding might have been quick too maybe a little rushed or the actual event is very short.

ex: In vietnam, you have to see a sort of pyschic that will tell you lucky dates to get married on. Sometimes it's just 1-2 weeks from when you visit them!

Chiron (12° pisces) in 10th house

You might get a lot of backlash for your relationship. People may dislike seeing you together. Your career will both suffer, or you'll suffer because of your career. People could hate your relationship. Your career will cause a lot of problems in the relationship. Perhaps it will cause you to be separated often i.e one person working in another country/state.

Jupiter(15° gemini) sextile uranus in 10th house

You could be a very popular couple. You may have a big presence on social media. You could experience sudden fame in the relationship. People just love talking about you and your partner. You could be seen as a friendly, unconventional couple. People think your relationship stands out. Maybe you'll find yourself talking about your relationship more than you initially expected.

Pisces 2nd house/2nd house ruler in 12th house

Money may come up as an issue in the relationship. Not necessarily in a bad way could just mean you both idealise money a lot, you could have unrealistic perceptions around wealth, beauty, food and luxury. You could spend a lot of money traveling, it makes sense if you are from different countries too, having to use money on long-distance travels a lot. Perhaps you could earn money through selling a fantasy, an image, an ideal or dealing with mental health issues. This makes me think of a couple that owns a getaway resort in the countryside, does reflexology or work as therapists. You could also be actors, artists or directors if it aspects the 5th house or has leo degrees. You could also sell/ spend money on weed, narcotics or alcohol lol.

Neptune in 12th house

You both may be very religious/spiritual together. You both could have sensed each other's presence waaaay before you met. Could have seen each other in dreams. You could learn more about spiritually, and strengthen your psychic talents/interests. You will be very connected to each other's spiritual side. You could also feel like you can't be separated from this person. Could be a karmic soulmate/relationship. Your relationship might also prove to be confusing at times. They might have misunderstandings around each other. Open communication is very important if you have this in a composite chart with someone.

Union (26° taurus) retrograde in Sagittarius 11th house

You may have met online before meeting physically. There could have been a time gap between the time you initially see/meet each other vs first face to face meeting. This is because you could come from different countries. Taurus makes me think that you were both at home when you first interacted/were introduced. But it could also be at a mall or restaurant or any beauty related event. You can check your union persona chart or my post about it here for more information. You could also meet face to face with them at their home/ a restaurant/a beauty event later.

Eros in leo/leo° 7th house

You could be very freaky together if you know what I mean. S*x is very hot, animalistic even. It's also very romantic, both of you know/want to pleasure each other and only each other. You can both be very possessive of eachother. You could also have a breeding kink lmao. You both want people to know that only you can give your partner this type of pleasure.

Venus conjunct mars

This is a very passionate relationship. S*x, love, and intimacy are highlighted. You could feel like your partner is a great lover. Great s*x. You could feel feverish, or obsessed with each other. You might share a lot of kinks or favourite positions. You both can feel like the other person does it exactly like you wanted.

Venus conjunct Juno

The other person might fit the description of your future spouse & how you meet completely. This might as well be your future spouse! Both parties feel like they are made for eachother romantically. Both might feel like they've met the one!

Venus conjunct MC

Your romance/relationship is very public. People that work with you will all know about your relationship. This is also a power couple placement to me.

Mars (19° libra) in Scorpio

You both work very well together. Both of your energies are on par. You are very possessive of your partnership. Definitely are intense and loove getting down and dirty. Can be very obsessed with eachother's presence.

Sun (4° cancer) in Scorpio

You are both very connected to eachother spiritually, physically and emotionally. Both of you will be very focused on how your partner feels, always making sure they are loved and protected. You are also seen as very private with eachother. Keeping the things that happen in the home between the two of you.

‿︵‿‿︵‿‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵‿︵‿‿︵‿

***disclaimer: entertainment & educational content only, reader discretion is advised***

Thank you for reading⁠ ♡

@northopalshore

Meant to be used in romantic relationships only, please do not use on unconsenting individuals (celebrities, one sided crushes) Delulu is not the solulu!!

[lomlhwa]

get out of my head (c.yj)

pairing: soulmate!yeonjun x soulmate!reader

preview: when you turn 18, you can hear your soulmate's voice in your head. you have to work to find each other, no matter the distance.

tags/warnings: fem reader, ITALICS IS YEONJUN IN READER'S HEAD + BOLD IS READER TALKING BACK TO YEONJUN, lots of dirty talk, monster cock!yeonjun (it's me, what do you expect), oral (m.receiving), face fucking, crying, pussy slapping, pet names (baby, pretty girl, good girl), unprotected penetration (wrap it before you tap it), creampie

trigger warnings: n/a

wc: 1.6k

song recs for this fic: yes, and? by ariana grande, 3d by jungkook, nonesense by sabrina carpenter

a/n: hey guys.... it's been a long time T-T hope you didn't forget about me. this is my first time writing a fic in a WHILE. hope you like it and i hope to post more maybe idk

“3! 2! 1! happy birthday!” your friends cry out at midnight on your birthday. you blow out the glowing candles on your birthday cake eagerly. you make a silent wish for your soulmate to be hot. 

your friends look at you expectantly. “has he said anything?” one of them says. you shake your head. your brain is still dead silent. no soulmate talking to you. “it is literally midnight, so he could be sleeping,” you shrug. your friends murmur among themselves as you slink down your chair.

“hellooo? anyone there yet?” a male voice appears in your head and you jump at the sound. your friends look at you concerned. “hello?” you sit in silence for a moment again, your friends remain unmoving. “fucking finally. took you long enough to turn 18.” you laugh and your friends relax. 

“he sounds pretty,” you say to your friends. they shake their heads. you’re the last one out of your friends to turn 18, therefore you’re the last one to hear your soulmate. your friends have been with their soulmates for months at this point. 

“my bad, i have a late birthday,” you respond to the voice in your head. your friends disperse through your house to let you talk to your soulmate for a few moments. 

“what’s your name? mine’s yeonjun. are you pretty? where do you live” you chew on your bottom lip while you listen to him talk to you. “my name is y/n,” your leg bounces as you answer the first question. “my friends think i’m pretty,” you add. 

you stay silent, debating if you should tell him exactly where you live or just the general area. saying you live ‘around seoul’ is too broad though. “well? where do you live?” you shake your head and just decide to give him the general area. 

“i live in busan.”

________________________________________

you stand outside a cafe nervously checking your phone every minute. you’re waiting for yeonjun. you’re meeting your soulmate. how terrifying. 

“i’m almost there. are you outside?” you jump when his voice rings out in your head. you’re still not used to having a whole other person in your head.

“yeah, i’m just waiting,” you lean against the wall behind you and observe your surroundings. yeonjun picked a really cute cafe to meet at. you watch as people walk mindlessly past you.

you look down at your phone until you hear yeonjun’s voice again. “what color are you wearing?” you look down at your outfit before replying. “pink.”

before you can say anything else, you feel a presence in front of you. you look up and make eye contact with one of the most beautiful men you’ve ever seen. he gives you a smile that lights up his entire face. 

“y/n.” it’s his voice. it’s his voice but outside your head. he’s in front of you. your mouth hangs agape as you realize this beautiful man is your soulmate. you flatten your hair and smooth out your outfit before you speak. “yeonjun.” 

________________________________________

before you know it, you’re back at his place with your back crashed against his front door. your date didn’t last long. he wanted you as soon as he saw you.

“you’re so fucking perfect,” his lips are attached to yours. being able to speak to each other telepathically really comes in handy when your mouth is otherwise occupied. 

his hands grip your hips and guide them to grind against him. he groans into your mouth. you can feel his hardening length through his jeans. it’s huge. 

“are you big?” you feel him smile against your lips at the question.

he grabs your hand and drags you towards his bedroom. “does the pretty girl wanna find out?” yeonjun says before pushing you down onto his bed. he stands between your legs, just looking at you. your face turns bright red under his dominant gaze. he’s basically fucking you with his eyes. 

“shirt.” his voice is commanding and you find your hands moving with a mind of their own to take your shirt off. you throw it on the floor next to his bed. you’re left in your pretty white bra and your pretty pink skirt. 

“fuck, so pretty,” his voice in your head makes you blush. he hasn’t even touched you yet and your panties are practically soaked through. 

he trails his big hands up your thighs, lifting your skirt in the process. he licks his lips at the sight of your soaked panties. he runs his long index finger over the wet patch, causing your hips to jerk. 

“you’re soaked. i haven’t even done anything, baby.” yeonjun’s tone is full of fake pity.

out of nowhere, he grabs you by the hips and forces you onto the floor. you’re on your knees in front of him. the tent in his pants is massive and you can tell that it probably feels unbearable. 

he undoes his belt and pulls his jeans down to his knees. he pulls his boxers down the same length and his cock flies out. it almost smacks you in the face. you look at it in pure shock. how is this natural?

“suck,” he orders. your jaw falls open and you welcome his length into your mouth. you take it slow and steady to try and prep your throat for his monster cock. you can tell that he’s getting impatient within just a few moments.

“please let me fuck your mouth, pretty girl.” the question sets something off in you and you feel like you would do anything for him. you stop all your ministrations and go limp. “do it.”

yeonjun gathers all your hair into a ponytail and uses it to move your head back and forth. you open your throat as much as you can but you could never manage to take all of him. there’s just too much.

his hips snap to meet the movements his making with your head. you cough and choke around him. saliva drips out of your mouth and onto the floor, creating a puddle. your eyes water and threaten to ruin your makeup. 

you look up at him with teary eyes and you can tell that he’s close, even through your blurry vision. “cum down my throat, jjunie.” your words in his head mixed with your teary gaze causes him to finish almost immediately. you choke a final time before he pulls out and watches you swallow. 

he lifts you off the ground with a foreign softness compared to his length in your throat. he lays you down and wastes no time in removing your panties. he leaves your skirt and bra, finding them particularly cute. 

he forces your legs apart to full take in your glistening pussy. he runs his palm over it before bringing his hand down and slapping it. you squeak, jerking back. your pussy continues to drip, so he does it again. 

“jun, please, need you,” you whine. your legs close to try and keep him from bringing his hand down again. tears well in your eyes out of the desperate need for pleasure. your core is throbbing.

yeonjun pries your knees apart and settles between your thighs, his cock brushing your core. “are you ready, baby? can you take it?” your eyes flicker down to his member, slight fear coursing through you. you nod hesitantly.

he brings his hand down to stroke himself before lining up with your weeping hole. “deep breaths pretty girl.” he pushes his cock in slowly, inch by inch. the stretch is painfully intoxicating. your eyes cross as he bottoms out.

“baby, breathe,” yeonjun says. you had been holding your breath while he pushed into you. you breathe sharply, trying to keep yourself from falling apart on his cock immediately.

“please, move jjunie,” you beg. you dig your nails into his forearms as he pulls all the way out and slams back in, balls slapping against your ass. you choke out a moan, throwing your head back into his pillow. 

“you suck me in so beautifully,” his voice rings out in your mind through the buzz of pleasure. you look at him to find his mouth slightly open, whines of pleasure escaping. his sweaty hair hangs over his eyes deliciously. you could cum just from seeing him like this. 

you clench around him, pleasure building up quickly. his fast pace thrusting into you has your mind going numb. you remove your hands from his forearms and grab him by the hair, forcing his lips to yours. he meets you in a feverish kiss, his thrusts becoming sloppier.

“i’m gonna cum, please fill me up jun,” you run your tongue over his bottom lip as he nods in acknowledgement. you wrap your legs around his waist as he uses your hole to get off.

your arms fall limp on the bed by your head and yeonjun takes the opportunity to hold your hands with his. he intertwines his fingers with yours in an attempt to ground himself.

“c-cum-” you stutter as your walls close in on him for a final time before you hit your high. he finishes immediately after you, your clenching becoming too much for him. his hips stutter and he lets out a high pitched whine as he spurts white hot cum into you. 

you pant, trying to catch your breath. you squeeze his hands gently. he collapses onto you, nuzzling his face into your neck. you brush your hair out of your face, finding that it’s sticking to your forehead.

“you’re so fucking perfect,” he whispers before kissing your neck gently. you giggle, biting your swollen bottom lip.

“my perfect soulmate.”

© lomlhwa 2024

[cowgirlcasanova]

I made the mistake of clicking on a link to a reddit thread about abigail marston.

the way the men on there talk about her makes me physically feel sick. the names they call her, the way they describe her and john’s relationship, the way they constantly bring up her past in a negative way.

They seem to lack any and all artistic thinking skills. to me, one of the main points of media and art is how you’re supposed to analyze and discover the things they aren’t outright said. You have to dig a little deeper, you have to actually think. The people on that godforsaken website seem to just not have/be able to do that!

abigail was a prostitute. yes, we all know this men of reddit and it’s okay! please shut up about it!!!!

she was also an orphan, even worse for the time, an orphaned girl. she had little to no opportunities in the world she was born into. EVEN JOHN KNOWS THIS. “she’s a woman in a man’s world” and they act personally offended on johns behalf. john was an orphan too, i can promise you he understands how hard it is to survive and he doesn’t look down on her! Not that it even begins to matter if john or anyone else “understands” her reasoning for her choice of survival. It doesn’t. it simply matters that abigail was incredibly strong throughout that time of her life and rest. she survived and did whatever she could to and that is to be appreciated.

These men seem to have this one single idea that “abigail was prostitute so john thought baby not his cause so many men 🤓” SHUT. UP. no actually that was so much more actually john not ready to be a father and being afraid of himself!!!! honestly speaking, the entirety of that situation has very little to do with abigail herself. but no they’ll never understand that because it was written out in black and white and you may have to think a little to get to that conclusion. not to mention, they could never accept it because then john marston wouldn’t be as “alpha” BE QUIET IM BEGGING YOU.

the way they discuss abigail and uncle made my skin crawl. there is nothing else said about that relationship, there is no one specific cannon explanation as to how or why they knew each other. but the men i saw discussing it said such disgusting and vulgar things about how uncle “reallyyy knew abigail”. truly horrifying. There’s so many different ways they could’ve crossed paths. she was a prostitute but that’s not all she was. she was still a woman, a person. i can assure you she had other hobbies and activities that she did, that she enjoyed doing.

not to mention how it seems to be such an odd and disgusting fantasy for them that “everyone in the gang had abigail” i hate to break it to you but no they didn’t! Now this is up for debate for a lot of people and i actually want to make an entire post just dedicated to this. When looking at both instances where that was said, it was purposely said to hurt john and throw him off. not to mention, abigail was never around when it was said. There wasn’t an instance of anyone saying it in camp or even throwing an insult to john about it in rdr2. hmmm i wonder why that is????? Bill said it to make him stumble and dutch said it because he knows john and he knows how to hit him where it hurts. But, i don’t think any of it is true. of course no internet bro is going to actually think into enough to even be curious so!

abigail marston is someone to be admired. someone who persevered as much as any man in that gang but she doesn’t get the same appreciation. she probably had to work just as hard if not harder than some of the men just to stay alive in her youth. Abigail marston is not a nag, she’s not annoying, she’s not “mean” to john. take a step back and look at what she’s responding to and give her the same grace you give arthur and john. “oh well arthur just had a hard time showing emotions because of the way he was raised” “oh john couldn’t deal with everything so he ran away for a little bit it’s okay.” let abigail have that same grace.

so sorry this was not meant to be this long. clearly it has been nagging at me. if you read this love you and love abigail marston!

[arminsumi]

two freaks

CHOSO ちょうそう

note : choso crack lol. i love him.

synopsis : you and choso have been the weirdest, freakiest, off-beat duo since the very beginning. your chemistry with each other thoroughly confuses the people around you. just two freaks in freaky love with each other.

warnings : 🔞 some suggestive content, mentions weed/getting high, unedited

no one knows how you and choso started dating. it's a mystery of the universe.

because you and him were always like mismatched socks. and yet you ended up together, for some reason. hell, even when you and choso were just friends you made an inside joke with each other;

"i have a type and you're not it." you'd joke.

"yeah i could never date you, either." choso would joke back.

if one of you accidentally flirted with the other, then you'd laugh and accuse each other of being horny.

"you're horny." you'd say.

"no i'm high."

"i thought you were choso?"

"no i'm your man."

"shit alright, let's get married."

your friends would sometimes overhear this and pull a funny face.

("are you guys crazy or high?")

"bitch, we're both."

you and choso met each other one day at an instrument store. you were accompanying a friend, they were choosing a guitar to gift someone — or whatever it was. anyways, so you were there lingering.

"you listen to the smiths?" choso scrunched his nose up.

"what's that face for! the smiths are great!"

so you and choso stood there, arguing about music. your friend just let you two be and snickered with the store's staff, who knew choso well because he practically lived in the store with how much he visited.

you visited that music store a lot and met choso over and over again, probably for a year before even exchanging numbers. neither of you were interested in each other, and you always argued about music... or at least it seemed like that to everyone else.

you and choso had an underlying comedy to each argument — yes obviously the both of you knew it was not that serious. choso just enjoyed debating music with you and was excited that someone finally debated back. sometimes he disagreed with your opinions even if he agreed, it became an inside joke.

"i like... (artist)" you'd say and then choso would shift his shoulders and lift his chin and reply with "oh, well now i can't like them if you like them. i refuse to associate with you." and you two would laugh.

the music store's staff genuinely thought you two were high every time you spoke, but at the time choso had a rule of never getting high and going in public because he'd embarrassed himself too many times.

sometimes you'd have a spontaneous hang out with choso. because he was spontaneous and you aspired to be.

one time, he said something unexpected when he lit up a blunt. you and him were loitering by a fast food restaurant's drive-thru.

"you know, i like the chemistry between our souls. i think we must have known each other in a past life."

"do you think we were also freaks in our past lives?"

he laughed and nodded, rubbing his watery eye when smoke got into it.

"we were definitely freaks."

"well, i also think our souls have got good chemistry. our souls are freaky."

"yeah, freaky souls."

you and him stared at each other. he seemed high but the rush hadn't even kicked in yet, so it must have been just because of your company.

"yo..." he cooed awkwardly. "sorry, didn't mean to stare." he mumbled something like that and looked away.

"eyes are the gateway to the soul. were you trying to perve on my soul?" you joked.

"yeah, i totally just perved on your soul." he laughed.

on that day, you distinctively remember talking to choso about how you two would be the last people to ever date. and he replied with some joke about "what if it were the apocalypse and we had to breed for repopulation purposes?" (how did you reply? he can hardly remember, all he knows is that he blushed at your reply until his cheeks burned.)

and then a year after knowing each other you were making out violently in his car after some friendofafriend's party. maybe you kissed him because he charmed you by playing the guitar earlier that night — he looked hot doing it, with his hair down, plectrum in between his teeth as he tuned it.

too many times have people scrunch up their noses in confusion when you and choso act like a couple.

whenever they ask;

"oh, are you two dating?"

with a weird attitude in their voice, you and choso troll them;

"no, we're partners in crime."

"yeah i do the killing and she gets rid of the evidence then we make out violently in the back seat of my car."

they look like they regret asking anything about you two. clearly you and choso were freaks.

people in your friend group make jokes all the time about how choso's in it for the pussy and you're in it for the weed.

"no actually i've been cutting back on my pussy consumption." choso replies with a face so plain that you could take him seriously.

"oh i been hittin' that blunt from the back lately i just can't get enough of it."

you completely confuse the people around you and troll them just for amusement. but truly you and choso do get fed up sometimes. it's sickeningly repetitive.

sometimes choso gets snappy, especially if it's a guy asking you;

"that's your boyfriend?"

"yeah that's her boyfriend." choso clenches his jaw and steers you into his arms.

ah, and his most classic response;

"are you her boyfriend?"

"no, i'm her wife."

© arminsumi

I do not permit the copying/reposting/translation/plagiarism of my works. Do not steal what I've worked hard to create.

This is fictional work.

[good-vs-evo]

saw some ppl on tiktok getting SO PRESSED about polycules and relationships other than hualian and that was kind of funny so i needed to make and explain my relationship chart

i’d love to explain to them (as a polyam person myself >:3) that love is not a limited commodity and hua cheng falling for yin yu doesn’t mean he suddenly doesn’t care about xie lian at all but i fear that would be lost on them HAHA

also if you… don’t wanna see that kinda stuff… just don’t look at it… don’t hate on people who do… life would be easier for everyone… but moving on

i debated splitting yin yu x he xuan x hua cheng from the moon quartet then decided against it because it was getting waaaay too chaotic

rip to quan yizhen, either he has no manhua art or i couldn’t find it (i haven’t read the manhua yet ffjhshd)

uhhh i got a lot of inspo abt huayin from @devotedbutterfly’s tiktoks and stuff (sorry for going thru like all of ur stuff and generally being a demon on ur tiktok and tumblr ahsjdj) and xuanyin/blackmoon stuff from @ghooostbaby so. yes their stuff is very cool :]

anyways-

first chart is different explanations for everyone’s relationship with one another

the second is me trying to simplify them into categories

BUT i’ll explain this a lotttt better in text

quanyin

uh. this one feels self explanatory

hualian

if i have to explain this one it’s over

fengqing

same as the first two LMAO

xianle trio

yes, i had to break the trio and quartet into different categories

mulian: mu qing always admired xie lian for his self-assuredness, strength, and also beauty. he was a bit jealous of him for a long time, but they were able to talk about it and they both forgave each other for everything that happened in the past. he's had a crush on him since the beginning, but was bad at showing it. xie lian thought mu qing was pretty and a very interesting person; when he got older, he regretted not spending more time getting to know him, so he makes up for it later on in life! he loves when mu qing is softer and shy and more vulnerable than he is usually, and loves how mu qing is a good listener and is pretty emotionally intelligent.

fengqing: well. you get the idea

fenglian: feng xin was always loyal, the first person to have fallen in love with xie lian, and dianxia’s first kiss. he would’ve never left xie lian if xie lian hadn’t told him to. he respected xie lian a lot. xie lian loved how much feng xin cared, and felt immensely guilty about being unable to give him anything more. when they reunite, he showers feng xin with gifts and words of affirmation (he got better at expressing his emotions) and they spend a lot of time together

xianle quartet

all the other ones stay the same, so i’ll just explain the two new ones

huaqing: they were once stuck together and had to talk just out of boredom. they bickered a little but the more they talked the more they realized that there was more to the other. mu qing feels genuinely bad about what he did to hua cheng. he has a hard time apologizing but he tried his best to express his remorse, and hua cheng was pretty shocked (previously thought mu qing was a bit of an asshole) and, since mu qing was being sincere, decided to accept his apology. they hit some rough patches now and then, but xie lian and feng xin help them through it. they realized they’re pretty similar, and team up to stir up trouble with people they don’t like sometimes!

huaxin: feng xin was jealous of hua cheng because he was the one who won xie lian’s heart after 800 years and was really happy when he found out that xie lian liked him too. he admires that hua cheng was strong enough to help xie lian so many times. he also likes that hua cheng is a little cocky sometimes (read: very often), and finds hua cheng very good looking. hua cheng was jealous of feng xin for being the first person to be that close to xie lian, but appreciates how loyal he was throughout everything that happened and finds him pretty cool. he likes the way feng xin curses a lot when he’s pissed (finds it endearing)

huayin

ONE OF MY PERSONAL FAVES!!!

yin yu fell first, because hua cheng was so fascinatingly determined and also like the prettiest person he’s ever met. he was intimidating, but could be quite kind, as he was to yin yu when they broke past the employee/employer relationship and became closer

hua cheng began to notice the way yin yu came off as so meek and unnoticeable, but had a kind of poised anger and strength beneath all of that. he trusted yin yu with a lot of more important tasks, paid him well, and considered him as more of a right hand man or partner in crime than a henchman, then eventually as just a partner

e’ming also likes yin yu, and trusts him to take care of it

hua cheng finds it endearing when yin yu gets protective of him (both of them know hua cheng is perfectly capable, but hua cheng finds it sweet regardless)

yin yu cheered hua cheng on a lot with xie lian and patiently listened to everything hua cheng had to say about him

huayinlian/hualianyu

ANOTHER PERSONAL FAVE

ppl keep being like “oh but hua cheng would never cheat on xie lian” HOW IS THAT CHEATING! GOOD LORD! HUA CHENG STILL LOVES XIE LIAN, BUT HAS ALSO DEVELOPED FEELINGS FOR THE PERSON HE SPENT THE MOST AMOUNT OF TIME WITH

i digress

yin yu fell for xie lian because he heard about him all the time. how could you spend so much time hearing about how wonderful, kind, gracious, and amazing someone is without catching feelings a little? additionally, hua cheng allowed yin yu to visit xie lian’s temple and leave offerings, trusting him to be genuine in his actions. yin yu saw some of the paintings and sculptures of xie lian and found him beautiful. he knows a lot about xie lian's life, and truly wants him to find peace and happiness

xie lian loves how devoted yin yu was to hua cheng and how much he helped him. he knows those years were hard for hua cheng, and he’s glad that he had a companion (contrary to what people say about “cheating”, xie lian is incredibly happy that hua cheng managed to find love while he was waiting). i know yin yu is canonically “plain”, but xie lian loves him and thinks he’s very handsome :) he gives him a lot of compliments and words of affirmation

blackmoon (yinxuan)

taking a moment to appreciate that very awesome ship name

yin yu thought he xuan was terrifying and intense, only to discover that. he’s just a guy (/pos). but he does have a lot going on! he has urges and a complex history and emotions he doesn’t show to a lot of people and plans within plans and is generally such an interesting person with so many layers to him. beneath a lot of those layers is a guy who’s kind and smart and would’ve stayed kind and smart if his life wasn’t utterly ruined

he xuan initially thought yin yu was just kind of pathetic, but learned more about him and started to like him more. he finds his passion really attractive, loves how genuinely sweet, kind, and gentle he is as well as how harsh, cruel, and unrelenting he can be. he treats he xuan well and makes him feel human and real and knows when to leave him alone and knows when he wants attention and cooks for him and-

they feel seen around each other, having experienced similar things (such as having their destiny “stolen” in different ways though) and have experienced suffering in such a firsthand way. they’re ready to just chill together now :)

moon quartet (hua cheng, xie lian, he xuan, and yin yu)

xie lian finds he xuan cool, doesn’t have too many thoughts about him. he xuan thinks xie lian is cute and also mildly terrifying (i’m definitely editing this later on, i just don’t have a lot of thoughts about them yet)

hua cheng and he xuan have been close for a long time, helping each other out with ghost king business. hua cheng let he xuan relax and chill at ghost city when he needed to, and he xuan kept a close eye on the heavenly capital, so they met often and bonded. they’re both motivated by something and are incredibly passionate about that thing, so they mutually admire the other’s drive and courage

i have the least for them so far, but i just think they’d be sweet together :] they’d all help each other heal and be able to talk to each other. they’d love each other a lot and take care of one another when they need it and be there when someone needs someone :3 idk they’re so traumatized and deserve to recover from that i’ll form more thoughts i swear

ANYWAYS. that’s it for now i’m def gonna write stuff for all of these ships :0 they’re all very special to me 💖 i might add them to my 30 day fluff challenge :3 cuz they all deserve some nice fluff! (ill also keep updating + editing! feel free to ask me to explain relationships more, id love to <3)

[tarotwithavi]

Your next relationship

Piles: 1~2~3

How to choose a pile?

Take a deep breath and close your eyes. Kindly ask your spirit guides to show you the right pile for yourself and then open your eyes. Whichever pile catches your attention is the right pile for you.

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Customize your reading

Pile 1

So first of all I'm getting that this person is an earth sign. This person is very hardworking and when they really want something they put their heart and soul into that. Though this person is hardworking but they lack structure, they don't know how to plan things out. They also don't really like working with people. You'll notice them sitting alone or working alone most of the time. This person is not so confident but they are currently working on it. I am also seeing that this person is extremely beautiful/handsome and I'm also getting that their love language is gifting and acts of service. They could be born in March or 3rd of any month. I'm also getting that they don't like it when people interfere in their personal matters. They like keeping things casual with people and rarely interact. You might meet this person through a group setting or they could be friends with your friends. They might have 2-3 friends that they trust the most. They might be rich or they are very good with money. I'm also getting that they don't think twice before spending on people they love. I feel like this person might have been through a breakup or a very bad ending with someone.

Your relationship with them is going to be really light and filled with love. I'm also seeing that you two might not chat a lot but there will still be a great understanding. You know the type of relationship where both the people are understanding and they don't stick together all the time. I do feel like this person doesn't like to act clingy but they do love you a lot. I get very light and sweet energy from this pile and I also feel as if this relationship will heal you. You might be the type of person who constantly needs drama in their relationship because normal relationships seem boring to you. This relationship will teach you what a healthy relationship is like.

Messages that might be significant: professional, classmates, number 3 and 9 , Taurus, roses, smell like vanilla, red, strong hands, white horse with wings, lots of presents and gifts.

Pile 2

You guys are each other's counterparts and there's no doubt in it. I also see that you could have a past life together with this person. Their energy is really healing and I'm also getting that they might like teaching or they could be a teacher. However I am also getting that when you guys first meet them might be stuck in a pattern or in a job that they don't enjoy much but they are just doing it because it pays them well. I am also getting that this person can have a deep voice and they might have monolid eyes. For some of you I'm getting that this can be your childhood friends or someone you know from your childhood but you didn't talk much at that time. They can have blue or light colored eyes. This person is really passionate and when they fall in love they fall in love deeply. For some of you this could be a karmic relationship but for most of you I'm seeing that this is a soulmate relationship. Your person loves late night talks and deep conversations. I'm also getting that your person is not a fan of small talks. Their favourite color might be blue or you could be wearing blue when you first meet them.

This relationship will force you to heal all your childhood traumas and I'm also getting that your person will help you a lot in the process. They'll help you become the best version of you and you'll help them do the same. And I'm also getting that some of you could even get married to this person. You guys might like to argue or have debates for fun. I also see that there are going to be a lot of deep conversations and late night walks. For some of you they could even write songs or poems for you. Very healing and healthy relationship. For those who are stuck with a karmic partner at the moment this person will come into your life when you leave your current partner and heal from the relationship.

Messages that might be significant: 🌙, resting B face, doctor or in medical field, not so bulky but muscular, snakes, Arabian nights, crows, eagle, swans, longs hair , life path number 6 and 2.

Pile 3

Nah the first message I got is that this person is really possessive 💀 I mean REALLY POSSESSIVE. They don't like sharing at all, once they decide something/someone is theirs they are determined to protect it/them at all costs. I am also getting that this person travels a lot and they might even change places a lot because of their parents'job. I also feel like this person is really rich and they like spending money. They might even have a business of their own or they might like to invest money in places that will give them benefits in future. I also feel like this person has a great understanding of how money Works so they never lack it. Oh and another thing I'm picking up on is that your person will straight off ignore other people who will try to approach them romantically. I feel like they will be so in love with you that the only thing they can see is you. They might be born of 7,16,25 of any month. This person has a lot of choices in love but all their focus will be on you. I'm also getting that this person might have Pluto in the first house or they could be Pluto dominant. Also they can be really indecisive when it comes to choosing gifts.

The first message I am picking up on is that this relationship will give you great life experience and teach you a lot of things. This is the relationship where you will learn about life and see how lovely life can be when in love. I'm also getting that this relationship will totally transform your mindset. The colour green could be really significant in this relationship. I'm also getting that your person might like hiking or you guys will spend most of the time in nature together. A lot of new experiences , love the vibes here.

Messages that could be significant: rivers and mountains, curly hair in buns, mama Bird protecting her baby, tooth fairy, nose piercing, china, glass birds, Genie from Aladdin, red curtains.

[peppermintquartz]

from a post by @parrishjeanna

--

I shouldn't have left Evan on the curb. Tommy kicks himself mentally when he gets home, and slumps into his armchair. But it stung when Evan told Eddie that they were going to look for "hot chicks". Stung in a way that Tommy didn't expect it to. It's not as if he expected Evan to declare out loud and proud that he's into dudes now, it's just that Evan panicked so fast in the presence of his best friend, and Tommy doesn't want to make him feel bad about any of this. He doesn't want to be shoved back in the closet either. It's taken him a lot of work to be comfortable with being gay, and Evan hasn't gone through all that yet.

He sighs again. Evan had looked so adorable, too, all flustered and blushing, too nervous to eat much but still engaged in their conversation. Tommy almost wishes he had taken that one step further, got a farewell kiss, but he would have caved to those big puppy eyes and he would have taken Evan to the movies and then there will be a more painful heartbreak for him in the future because he hadn't been firm this time. He knows this for a fact; it's not his first rodeo.

Nonetheless, there is a sense of wistful regret. He really wants to have kissed Evan a second time.

--

Evan's sitting there in the sun, glancing left and right, and Tommy's heart leaps into his mouth at how charming - yes, that's the word - the scene is. He takes a deep breath and sticks his hands in his pockets and walks closer.

He sees the exact moment Evan notices him, the way the younger man's smile widens.

"Hey," Evan says, and he's still as adorable as he was the first time Tommy saw him, when Howie led him and Eddie to the helicopter and they made hasty introductions.

"Hey," Tommy replies, and cringes inwardly at how forced-casual his tone is. It's the talk, he guesses, the one the guys give when they want to let Tommy down easy, to let him know that they were mistaken about feeling like that about him.

"Thanks for agreeing to meet me," Evan continues

"Of course."

Motioning to the coffee he ordered for Tommy, Evan smiles and says, (rambles, really) "I didn't know how you take it, so I, uh, just took a guess."

Tommy tries it. He debates for a second if he should lie, but puts that thought away. Better to be honest. "Mm. So, not like that."

"Seems like there's a lot we don't know about each other," Evan chuckles and Tommy's heart skips again. God, Evan is so good-looking, especially when his smile lights up his whole face like that, and Tommy braces himself for the letdown.

He meets Evan's eyes. "Practically everything."

"Well," says Evan, and Tommy steels his heart, and Evan continues, "I would like to change that."

What? Tommy suddenly is unable to breathe. He listens to Evan's apology, reassures him that there's nothing to apologize for (this part he has done three times in the past four years, and he means it - he doesn't want to force people out of the closet if they didn't want to be out), explains his reasoning.

Evan smiles wryly. "Still. The way I-I reacted was... not my proudest moment."

This part's new. Tommy nodded. "Noted."

"So you said before, um, th-that you don't think I'm ready."

Oh. Here it is. Tommy keeps his hands under the table, his fingers linked tightly. He's gonna say that he thinks I'm right. That he really isn't ready.

"And the truth is, I don't know what I'm ready for," Evan says, and it is unfair how sincere he looks in that moment, because all Tommy wants is to lean over and kiss the uncertainty out of him, and he can't do that. Not if Evan wants to just be friends. Oblivious to Tommy's internal struggle, Evan continues, "...but I am ready for something. And I think that something... could be with you."

Tommy's fingers clench together. His heart forgets how to beat. He forgets how to breathe. He takes a moment. He can't hide his smile.

"You already know that I'm interested," he manages to say, hoping it comes across clearly enough that it's not merely interest but also desire, yet afraid to be too blatant about what he really wants out of this.

Evan grins and breaks through all of Tommy's defenses. "Come with me to my sister's wedding."

"What?!" Tommy doesn't even know his voice can go that high-pitched, but the sheer enormity of what Evan is offering, just days after that date...

"I want you," Evan repeats, "to be my date for my sister's wedding."

"Evan." It's an Are you sure? and it's not just about the date, it's not just about being his date for his sister's wedding, it's about everyone knowing, and Evan has to understand, he must understand what a huge step it is...

Evan doesn't even hesitate. Tommy's still processing the invitation and finally hears Evan say, "...already know half the people there, and she wants to meet you."

His sister knows about me. He's told her about me. Tommy's never been thrown into the deep end like this. He can't remember being anyone's date to a wedding, let alone a family member's wedding, where his colleagues will also be present. Everyone in Evan's life that matters to him will know.

"Are you... absolutely sure about this?" Tommy asks, needing to confirm this.

Evan's smile is brighter than the sun. "Yes, I'm sure. There's gonna be free food, and I need someone to dance with."

How can anyone say no to that? As Tommy accepts the date, he feels a lot lighter and freer than he has done for a long, long time. This feels right, he thinks, gently squeezing Evan's hand tucked between his own. Let this be right for us both.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA getting a tattoo to represent my significant other without asking first?

Hi! I (20M) am polyamorous and have two partners. Let’s call them A(20) and B(19). I’ve been with both for 4+ years and they are dating each other too.

As you can tell from the title, I’m considering getting a tattoo that would remind me of B on my upper thigh. It would be small and pretty simple, just a flower that they like. I’ve never had a tattoo before, so it may end up being my first but that remains to be seen as I have a couple other ideas for tattoos I’d like to have. I’m debating whether or not to run this by them first. I would feel a little odd not doing so, but also I am very anxious when it comes to talking about romantic gestures and the like. I would probably die of anxiety trying to bring it up with them! It’s something that I really struggle with and I am trying to get past it but it doesn’t change that it’s difficult for me. Another reason I’m considering just doing it and not mentioning anything is that it would just be for myself to remind me of them and feel closer to them when we’re apart.

On the other hand, getting a tattoo to represent someone is pretty big and pretty permanent! They would probably end up seeing it eventually, and may put together my reason for getting it. This might make them feel uncomfortable to an extent with it being unexpected, and they may feel like it puts more emotional responsibility on them (I don’t quite know how to describe my thought process here but I hope you understand what I mean. Putting unwanted responsibility on people is another thing I get anxious over).

The other issue is it would feel a little odd to not get a tattoo representing A as well, but the thing is I can’t think of any design simple enough that I would enjoy outside of the association it would have with A. What appeals to me so much about the idea of getting the flower tattooed is that it’s simple, can be executed well in a small area and would hold a lot of meaning without being too complicated. There’s nothing I can think of that I associate so clearly with A that would fit these requirements. This is a more minor issue, though.

So, tumblr, WIBTA?

What are these acronyms?

[im-sleepdeprived]

Seasonal • Pt. 2

pairing: peter parker x reader

summary: inspired by the taylor swift song ‘peter’ where you and peter discover just how hard it is to hold on to something from your past, no mater how much you love each other

a/n: things are progressing :)) right now im picturing this series as 5 parts, also i’ve been getting tons of requests and TRUSTTTT that as soon as this series is over I’ll be working on those🫡

warnings: none really, some (lots) angst, some pining, there are some time skips both forward and backwards and I don’t have them marked (sorry !) but theyre pretty easy to spot imo, healthy family relationships :(

masterlist, read part 1 here

You blew out a breath as you set down the last box. “Ok, I think we’re done sweetie,” said your dad from his spot across the room. 

You collapsed on the bed, exhausted from hauling boxes into your new dorm. The place you’ll be living for the next school year. “Your mom’s already in the car, said she couldn’t handle this part.”

You sat up and smiled. “Yeah, I don’t know if I can either.”

Your dad chuckled. “Come here kiddo.” You stood up and walked over, your dad pulling you into a warm embrace. “If you need anything, just let us know, we’ll be here faster than you can blink.”

“I’ll be okay,” you whispered. 

“And…try to make friends honey. It’s a new place, new people. Get out there, okay? Promise me you won’t just lock yourself in here all the time.” 

“I promise,” you pulled away. “I actually have an orientation to get to in about an hour, I’m sure I’ll meet tons of people there.” 

“I love you,” he squeezed your shoulders for emphasis. “I know this was hard for you, breakups-”

“Dad I promise I’m fine.” You didn’t want to talk about this at all, let alone with your father. 

He stared at you for a while before seemingly giving up. Your dad let out a sigh, “Fine. But if you decide this isn’t for you, if you think college completely sucks I’ll come pick you up in a heartbeat.”

You smiled and leaned over to press a kiss to his cheek. “Thanks, Dad. Tell Mom I love her.”

“Will do kid,” he ruffled your hair. “Now let me get outta here before I start sobbing.”

You laughed and gave him one last hug before waving him off. You fell onto your bed again and let out a sigh. Across the room stood another bed, empty. For now. You hadn’t met your roommate, and you didn’t really want to. You weren’t in the mood for introductions and small talk. You weren’t even sure if you were up for going to that orientation you’d told your dad about, it was recommended, not mandatory.

There was only one person you wanted to talk to, whose voice you craved to hear. The problem was, it was the one person you couldn’t call. 

Columbia definitely wasn’t going how you thought it would.

Your first week flew by, you’d met all of your professors and for the most part, they were all pretty nice. You’d even made some friends; a girl named Marissa and another one named Lola. You’d met them both at the freshman orientation andthey were really sweet. You ended up going after your dad had sent you a little reminder (you wondered if he had known you were lying) and you figured it couldn’t hurt. They were nice enough people and it was good to get to know your peers. Your roommate, Lindsay, had come in on your second day, but apparently, she was dating some dude who owned an apartment right off campus and she spent most of her time there.

Clubs and all different frats and sororities were camping out in little booths all around campus trying to get new members. Seeing the photography club’s booth sent a sharp jab of pain through your heart every time. It was even worse when you realized one of the biggest photography classes was in the building right next to the English building, which is where most of your classes would be taking place. For your whole time there. 

It was one day a couple of weeks into your classes, you were exiting a class where you been debating whether it was better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all. Some students were talking privately, but the teacher had overheard them and made it a class discussion, exclaiming that she thought it was 'a trendy enough subject to raise engagement and break the ice’.

Then as you stepped out of the doors to your class, a flyer flew in from beside you and landed right at your feet. When you picked it up you realized it was a flyer for the annual photography competition. It was actually a pretty big thing around here and you’d heard a few students talking about it. 

You didn’t usually believe in signs but these seemed pretty clear. 

Without overthinking it, you pulled out your phone. 

hey

saw something abt photography and thought of you lol. how are you hows school so far ?

You bit your lip in anticipation. You weren’t expecting him to reply right away but…you were nervous he might not have even replied at all.

He was the one who’d said maybe no contact for a while might help, but he’d also said you could call him whenever, and he’d be there for you, no matter what.

i was just thinking about you

The words made your heart skip a beat as you saw them sprawled across your screen. 

school’s great, still trying to get the hang of things but it’s gotten easier

my roommate’s kinda boring, but maybe that’s for the best. he could be a crazy person

You laughed until another message showed up on your screen. 

how’s columbia? is it everything you dreamed it would be?

no of course not. we were supposed to go here together, we were supposed to BE together. i can’t go anywhere without thinking of you and all i want to do is call you and hear your voice and for things to be okay between us again. 

But you couldn’t send that. 

yeah ! it’s great but like you said, lots of adjusting haha

are you happy?

And you weren’t sure what it was exactly, but something about that text made you tear up. Were you happy? The answer should’ve been an automatic yes, you’d gotten into your dream school after stressing all year about it, you had got the classes you wanted, and everything was seemingly fine. Great even. But you couldn’t shake the hollow emptiness you’d been carrying since graduation. 

You’d gotten what you’d wanted, yes. It just wasn’t how you’d imagined it. 

yeah i am :)

glad to hear it ace

look ive got to go i have a class starting. talk to you soon

bye pete

bye

It wasn’t normal. At least, it wasn’t your normal and you hated it. But maybe now, it was.

Your heart raced when you saw the notification. You were so close to tapping it, reading the whole thing but you held back. Columbia’s acceptance emails went out today and you and Peter were supposed to open yours together. 

You were waiting for him on the fire escape bouncing your leg up and down anxiously. Checking your phone for the time again, you decided you’d just call him. 

“Hey Ace,” you heard his voice through the speaker, along with an array of other noises. 

“You’re out. Are you out? It’s okay, we can talk later.” You replied quickly. 

Peter chuckled on the other end. “No, it’s fine. I’m just swinging.”

You frowned. “I thought we agreed, no swinging and talking. You get too distracted Petey.”

“No you agreed Ace, I just politely listened.” You could hear the smirk in his voice.

“Peter,” you said in a warning tone. 

“Sorry, sorry.” He laughed. “I’m on my way.”

“Oh?”

“Duh. I know what today is, I got my notification. I’m almost there.”

“Have you checked?”

“‘Course not Ace,” he chuckled. “Have you?”

“No, no way, of course not.”

“Great, I’ll be there in five.”

“Okay, I’ll see you then,” you pulled the phone away to hang up and you could hear his protesting. Quickly, you yelled into the speaker, “Watch where you’re swinging babe!” And you hit the red button. 

He always said he preferred swinging on call with you, but there’d been too many close calls of him almost swinging into a building or in front of a car for you to be okay with it. 

Sure enough, in almost exactly five minutes Peter landed on your fire escape, feet on the ground, perfectly contact. 

“Good, you're here.” You rushed over and pulled him into a hug, kissing his cheek as he swiped his mask off. 

He pressed a kiss to the top of your head, “Thank you for waiting Ace, I’m sure it must’ve driven you crazy.”

“No, I’m good.” You said too quickly to sound true. 

He laughed. “Okay,” he pulled away and gripped your shoulders. He shook you slightly and grinned. “Let’s do this!”

You sit down on the floor cross-legged and unlock your phone. Peter followed suit as you stared at him. You both pulled up your applications, ready to see the change in your status. 

Accepted or denied. 

A new door to your future, either opened or slammed in your face.

“Ready?” He asked you gently. 

“Yeah, are you?”

He nodded. “Okay on the count of three. One. Two. Three.”

You clicked. You almost didn’t want to read and you were sure if Peter weren’t there you would’ve stalled a little more, but the words were in front of you now. 

Dear Y/N Y/L/N,

Congratulations! It is a pleasure for me to inform you that you have been accepted for admission to Columbia College.The faculty and staff would like to commend you on your past accomplishments, which formed the basis of our admission decision in a highly competitive pool of applicants. We look forward to working with you in your future academic endeavors. Please visit the Welcome to Columbia website at:

You stopped reading. Your mouth hung open and you couldn’t believe it. You kept rereading that first sentence over and over as if it would morph before your eyes and call you out for believing it in the first place. 

You looked up. Peter had a similarly awestruck expression on his face as he met your eyes.

“What does yours say?”

“What does yours say?”

He laughed. “Nuh-uh. I asked first Ace.”

Silently, you hand him your phone, letting him see for himself because you can't even form the words. You got in. 

It didn’t take him long, probably only reading the first few words before he put the phone down and pulled you into a tight hug. 

“I’m so proud of you Ace,” he whispered. “See? I told you you’d get in.”

You squeezed him. “I love you so much Petey, but come on you need to show me yours, s’only fair.”

“Don’t wanna,” he mumbled into your hair. 

Your brows furrowed. Why wouldn’t he want to show you? It would only make you happier to read his acceptance letter as well. You pulled away and reached for his phone on the floor. Peter didn’t stop you. 

Dear Peter Parker,

The Committee on Admissions has carefully reviewed your application to Columbia University, and we are sorry to inform you that we cannot offer you a place in—

You couldn’t believe it. You read it over and over and over again. Never once in a million years did you think Peter wouldn’t get in. The boy was a fucking genius and you couldn’t believe they would reject him. 

“Ace it’s not that big of a deal, honestly-”

“What? Of course it is,” you looked up at him, anger coursing through your veins. “They’re fucking idiots. They’re pieces of shit and this,” you held up his phone, “this is the biggest load of bullshit I’ve ever seen.”

He cracked a small smile. “Actually, that’s my phone. With you on the lock screen mind you.”

You weren’t feeling it. “Peter, they suck.”

“Obviously not if they accepted you.”

“Nuh-uh,” you shook your head quickly. “I don’t wanna go.”

“What?”

“No,” you shook your head some more. “I don’t trust people with such terrible judgment to lead me into my ‘future academic endeavors’. I don’t trust those little shits at all.”

“Ace come on, you don’t mean that.” He gave you a look. 

“No, I totally do. Actually, I might just-”

He cut you off, leaning in and pressing a kiss to your mouth. But just as soon as it’d begun, it was over. Peter leaned back, “That always works whenever you’re too worked up.”

“Peter,” you said, and your voice sounded defeated. 

“Ace listen to me,” he cupped your face and stared straight into your eyes. “You are going to go to that school, and you’re gonna love it. There is absolutely no way I’m running this for you.”

“You’ll ruin it by not being there,” you mumbled.

“No, I won’t. Because you’re going to be too busy blowing everyone's mind and being the absolute best version of yourself that you can be.”

You laughed softly but it held no humor in it. “But we were supposed to go together.”

“But that shouldn’t stop you from enjoying it without me. So what if I didn’t get in? I applied to other schools, greatschools. And if I really feel like it, I can always transfer, it’s easier that way isn’t it?”

“And what about us?” You bit the inside of your cheek anxiously. 

“Nothing’s gonna happen to us Ace,” he smooshed your face making you laugh. “Just because we aren’t going to the same school doesn’t mean we have to break up.”

It felt like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders. You weren’t aware of just how terrified you’d been for the future of your relationship until he’d said that. You know people had little to no faith in high school relationships but…something was different about you and Peter. You were sure of it. You’d get through this. 

You made your way through the halls. You were in an old building, one of the campus’ firsts, and you were on your way to the newsroom. Today was your first official day and to say you were nervous was an understatement. You knew how serious this was, they were the second-oldest college daily paper in the country, and they didn’t just let anyone onto their team. You were ready to prove yourself and prove that you’d be a great addition to the news staff. 

Also, you needed something that would get you to stop thinking about Peter. You’d talked a few more times after that first week, and it was always you who initiated your chats. They never went past simple hey’s and how are you’s and then one of you (usually Peter) had to run off. It was so strange for you to think that once you two could’ve talked about nothing and everything for hours and now you could barely get past simple greetings. 

You stopped in front of a door, checked the number beside it to make sure you had the right one and took a deep breath before turning the handle. 

You heard all the commotion before you saw it, confirming your suspicions that this was the newsroom. Before you, the room was filled with desks, each one supporting its own computer and keyboard, most of them filled. Some desks were neat and tidy, their chairs empty, looking as if they hadn’t been touched. Others were the complete opposite, you couldn’t see the surface of them, they were covered in stacks and stacks of papers, loose pencil shavings, and various other items. 

There was a whiteboard on the same side of the wall as the door and it was almost completely covered in lists, locations, and time stops for certain activities. There were copies of different editions of the paper framed and hanging on the wall. You smiled, this was perfect. 

Suddenly, you felt a tap on your shoulder. You turned around and came face to face with a guy who looked to be a couple of years older than you. He had cropped black hair and stubble covering the entire bottom half of his face.

“First day, right?” He asked you. 

You nodded quickly and offered him your hand. “Y/N Y/L/N.”

He accepted it and nodded. “Yeah, I remember you Y/L/N, your try-out piece was good. Really good.”

Pride bloomed in your chest and you gave him a smile. “Thanks. Where do you want me?” You gestured at the room. 

He narrowed his eyes slightly before giving you the smallest of smiles, a little quirk on the sides of his lips. “Straight to business, I like that. Think we’re gonna get along pretty well Y/L/N, come on.” He started walking you through the room and introducing everyone and their roles. “I’m Brandon, the editor, over there we’ve got our photographers, that girl,” he pointed to a redhead working at her desk, “Alyssa, she’s editor-in-chief. Helps with things I can’t get around to and when there’s an overload of articles, like now.

“It’s not usually this crowded in here, usually the only people always in here are the writers but, you know, start of the school year,” he gestured vaguely, “lots of new editions, things to be sorted.” He stopped in front of one of the desks that looked like it hadn’t been touched. “This is your place. Actually, we already have something for you to work on.”

You sat in your chair and got adjusted. “Great! Anything.”

He smirked. “We need someone to cover the new bathrooms opening near Kent Hall. Good luck,” he tapped your desk before heading off to deal with other things.

You stared for a bit, when you’d said anything that wasn’t really what you meant, but you figured you had to start somewhere. 

“Don’t worry,” a voice spoke from beside you and you turned towards him. “They do that to all the newbies, it’s like a right of passage or something. Write the shitty articles for the first few months, prove your worth, or some bullshit like that.” He rolled his eyes and gave you a small. Holding out his hand he said, “James Blake, nice to meet you.”

You returned his smile and shook his hand, “Y/N Y/L/N, nice to meet you too James.”

He grinned. James was blonde, he had a dazzling smile, and striking green eyes. Honestly, he looked more fit for a magazine cover, not a newsroom. “Well Y/N, I was in your shoes last year. It gets better,” he sent you a wink. 

You laughed, “Actually, I don’t mind. I’m just happy to be here.”

“That’s the kinda attitude that’ll make you editor in a few years if you want it,” he clicked his tongue and leaned back in his chair. 

You tried not to blush, his gaze was intense and you had a feeling he was trying to gauge what kind of reaction you’d have, though you weren’t sure why. “Right now the only thing I’m worried about are those new bathrooms near Kent.”

James laughed. “Fair enough. If you need anything, I’ll be right here. Don’t be shy to ask for help.” He winked at you again and you thanked him before turning on your computer and getting to work. 

Your first day in the newsroom was mostly getting used to everything. The people were cool, you had a great time getting to know them all, and you could definitely see yourself working here for the rest of the year, even longer than you hoped. You’d written down the keynotes for your article and had planned to start working on it later that week after you walked over to Kent Hall and got a look for yourself. It was a lousy topic, sure, but that would stop you from trying your best and proving yourself. 

It was true what they said, your first semester does fly by. Or at least that’s what you’d heard and now you understood. It was December now, almost winter break, and you almost couldn’t believe it. 

Your first article on the Daily Spectator had gone over pretty well. It was small, practically pointless as it was shoved somewhere in the back where almost no one looks, but Brandon liked that you didn’t just half-ass it and he’d started to (gradually) give you better topics to work on. You were hoping that by the end of the year, you might get your hand on one of the campus hot topics. 

You’d gone out a few times, Marissa and Lola from your first week were always inviting you out to different places andyou envied their easygoingness. You’d accepted a few times but you always went home earlier than them, you never seemed to really fit in those places.

Tonight, you were going out with a few of your friends from the newspaper. Over the past couple of months, you quickly became close with some of them, especially Alyssa. Even James, who was an okay guy, if a little cocky, but overall they were all good people.

One of your favorite things about Columbia was its campus and the fact that it was in the city. Walking around now, the snow glittered under all the lights, reminding you of the stars you and Peter used to watch together. You looked up at the empty sky and wondered if he could see any stars where he was now, if they reminded him of you. 

You walked into the restaurant and took off your coat. You were wearing a simple sweater dress with a high neck and a pair of ankle boots. You spotted Alyssa sitting at a table waving you over and you smiled as you walked towards her. 

“Hey everyone,” you took a seat beside Alyssa. Directly across from you, James shot you a grin.

“Hey Y/N, we’re still waiting on Nikki and Gavin,” Alyssa said. Her phone dinged and she checked it before saying, “That was her, they’ll be here in 5.”

Conversations flowed around the table and soon, Nikki and Gavin arrived. Everyone was laughing and having a great time and when the waiter arrived to take your orders, it took you a second to notice.

“Let me guess your order,” James leaned over the table with a small smile as the waitress started going around the table. 

You grinned. “Go ahead.”

“Hmm…” he opened up the menu in front of him and pointed to a listing of words. “Shrimp?”

Laughing, you shook your head. “No.”

“Okay, okay. Are you vegan? Any food allergies I should know about?” He wondered. 

“I’m getting the Fettucini Alfredo, what about you?” The way he gasped you thought you’d asked him to take his pants off right then and there. 

He shook his head, “I can’t believe you ruined the game. I was supposed to guess Y/N.”

You winced. “Sorry.”

“It’s alright, have you ever tried their steak?” He gave you one of his infamous smiles, “It’s great.”

“No actually, I haven’t been here before.”

“Really? Alright wait,” he held up a hand and turned his head. You hadn’t even realized the waitress had gotten to you. “I’ll have the ribeye, medium rare. And same for her,” he pointed towards you. 

You stared as the waitress turned toward you. “Any sides?”

“Um, the seasoned fries with a cherry coke please.” You weren’t really sure what to order anymore, James had just completely thrown you off. 

When the waitress finished up and walked away to hand your orders in, James turned toward you again. “You’re gonna love it, you’ll see.”

Jokes were shared around the whole table throughout the whole dinner and you were glad you got to have a night like this before finals week. James kept asking what you thought about the steak and while you didn’t hate it, you didn’t love it either. It wasn’t what you had wanted. But you didn’t want to hurt his feelings so you smiled and told him it was great. 

By the end of the night, you were stuffed and ready to go home. “You sure you don’t wanna join? Nikki said she hooked up with one of the security guards once and she thinks she could get us into the VIP section.” You had just finished paying for your food and Alyssa was currently trying to convince you to head over to some club with them. And you might’ve been tempted if your phone hadn’t just buzzed in your hands. When you looked down you saw that it was a message. From Peter. 

Your heart fluttered in your chest. He texted you. 

“Sorry Lyss, I’m not up for it,” you made a face, “I’m pretty sure I’m about to start my period and I’m feeling a little off.” It wasn’t a lie, but it wasn’t the complete truth. 

She nodded in understanding. She pulled you in for a hug, “Alright, well if you need anything, let me know. And if you change your mind, the address was sent in the group chat.”

You smiled at her when you pulled away. Alyssa had the sweetest soul of anyone you’d met and you were glad to call her a friend. “I will thank you, and that goes for you too. If you need a ride or anything, let me know and I’ll come pick you up. And turn on your location.”

“Already done,” she grinned. You returned the grin and said your last goodbyes to everyone before making your way to the door, you were itching to step outside and open your phone. But instead, a hand gripped your shoulder. You turned around to see James smirking as he looked at you.

“Leaving so soon?” He asked. 

You nodded, “Not really up for clubbing tonight, but you guys have fun!” You made to pull away but he held you back.

“You sure,” he furrowed his brows, “it’s not that late. If you come, you don’t even have to stay long.”

Smiling, you nodded again. “Yeah, I’m sure. Thanks for asking though.”

“Anytime,” he shot you another grin but…it wasn’t quite right. He still looked handsome as ever, sure, but if you didn’t know any better you’d think he looked a little disappointed. “Well, have a good night Y/N.”

“You too James, bye.” You waved at him and walked out the door without looking back. As soon as you were out the door, your phone was opened and in your messages app, opening you and Peter’s chat. 

hey ace, how’ve you been?

hey pete <3 i’ve been good, just finished dinner with some friends. what about you ?

that’s nice I hope you had a good time.

i’m good thanks. 

actually i wanted to ask what your plans for winter break are

nothing actually, you ?

i’m coming back home and i was wondering if i could see you

Your heart almost stopped. He wanted to see you.

You tried not to get your hopes up, it probably meant nothing. Obviously, you were still friends, or friendly, and maybe he just wanted to catch up. You could only share so much over text. Or maybe….maybe he’s been missing you just as much as you’ve been missing him and he’s realized all this was a big dumb mistake. 

Maybe you were getting your hopes up. 

i’d love that

when do you get here ?

You two stayed texting back and forth your whole walk home. He sent you a picture of his ticket and told you he and May would love to have you over the next day. You couldn’t fight the giddy smile that took over your face. You were ecstatic he reached out to you and you realized your texts together had probably been off because he was nervous. You knew how anxious he could get sometimes, and you hoped you could resolve that when you saw each other. 

You settled in your dorm that night with your heart full and your face lit up. You hadn’t felt this overjoyed in a long time. You wondered what made him bite the bullet and ask, but you could ask him that when you see him. God, you were gonnasee him. This was all you’d been wanting since the summer and now the opportunity just fell into your lap.

You sat on your bed and fell asleep staring out the window with a smile on your face. 

Graduation was right around the corner. The last week of school was a blur. Everyone was throwing parties, teachers were cutting you extra slack, and people who’d never hung out once in the four years they went to school together were all over each other now. It was sweet in a way. As much as you’d all complained and whined about everything, there was a sense of familiarity here, with each other, a community that was coming to an end and it was nice seeing people try to savor it while they could.

Peter had gotten into Duke. You were beyond excited and proud of him and you knew he was excited as well. But you couldn’t help the tiniest part of your brain that selfishly wondered what that meant for you. And honestly, you were scared to ask. 

Peter hadn’t brought up anything about your relationship changing or anything else of the sort, so you thought he’d come to the same conclusion you had; you were going to try to do long distance. 

Sure, it might be hard but honestly, it was better for you than the alternative, which was ending things. You would definitely choose long-distance over that. So you tried not to worry too much, he was probably thinking exactly like you. 

You were sat in a booth at an ice cream parlor with MJ and Ned sitting across from you, and Peter beside you, arm slung over your shoulder. He’d been acting a little weird lately and you hoped this would help cheer him up, it was probably all those end-of-the-year jitters. You were all laughing together, going over all your (least) favorite memories from school.

“Who remembers when Flash brought all those stink sprays to school?” Peter said. 

“Oh my god,” Ned started in his seat. “Some kid tripped over his backpack in fifth period and set them all off! The whole class smelled so bad they made us evacuate!”

Everyone cracked up but Ned wasn’t having it. He shook his head quickly, brows furrowed in confusion. “Why are you laughing? It’s not funny! I smelled so bad my mom wouldn’t let me in the house, she made me rinse with the hose in our front yard!”

That just made you all laugh even harder. “Oh my god,” you wheezed out. “I can’t breathe.”

MJ reached across the table and grabbed your hand. Looking you dead in the face with a serious expression she said, “Breathe girl.”

The whole table roared with laughter again. “Why did he have all those bottles of stink spray anyway?” wondered MJ.

“Knowing Flash he probably thought it was cologne,” grumbled Peter, making you laugh again.

 Once you’d quieted down Ned leaned back in his spot and sighed. “I’m really gonna miss this.”

You looked around, trying to fully take in this moment. You had no doubt you would all manage to stay in touch but when was the next time you would all be hanging out like this? MJ was headed to Sarah Lawrence, Ned was going to MIT, you (of course) were going to Columbia, and Peter was going to Duke. Five hundred miles away from where you were going to be. 8 hours 27 minutes and 36 seconds.

Sure in the grand scheme of things, you were all still relatively close to each other but…you’d have separate lives. For so long your lives were so intertwined with each other’s and now, you’d have to fight to keep that connection otherwiseyou’d lose it. You reached under the table and grabbed Peter’s free hand, intertwining his fingers with yours. You would fight.

Peter squeezed your hand and you leaned in closer to him. “I’m gonna miss it too,” he said in a soft voice. 

“Not me, I can’t fucking wait to get out of there. You guys keep talking though.” MJ said straight-faced making you giggle. You were thankful for her brutal honesty cause you were pretty sure if the conversation kept going in the other direction, it would end with you crying, and you didn’t want that. 

The group of you finished your ice cream while talking, got even more ice cream, talked some more, and suddenly you could see the sun setting outside.

“Holy fuck,” you muttered, shoveling a spoon of double chocolate chip into your mouth. “I really thought we’ve only been here for five minutes.”

“Well, now we know what you need to work on before college, Y/N. Your time awareness, we’ve been here for hours.” MJ smirked. 

You all laughed except Peter, who squeezed your shoulder and frowned. “She doesn’t need to work on anything, she’sperfect.”

You smiled and leaned over to kiss his cheek, “Thank you, Petey.”

He grinned cheekily at you, “Anytime, Ace.”

Mj rolled her eyes and cut you off with a loud groan. “Oh. My. God. We get it, you are disgustingly in love.” But you didn’t miss the small smile gracing her face. 

“You’ll live,” you deadpanned.

She grumbled something you couldn’t make out but before you could ask her what it was, Ned’s phone started ringing. He picked it up and answered.

“Hey mom…already? But…” his voice quieted down. “Ok, ok I’m sorry. Yes, ma’am. Bye.”

He hung up and you were all quiet for a moment before he said, “I changed my mind, I’m so ready for college.”

He dropped his head into his hands, grumbling about something like it’s not funny! while you all laughed. Finally, he stood up. “I actually really do have to go though.”

You all stood up as well, saying your goodbyes. “Yeah I think we should get going too, what do you think?” Peter asked you.

You nodded as you pulled away from your hug with Ned. “I still need to pick up my cap and gown from the dry cleaners.”

Ned nodded, “I got mine earlier today.” You high-fived him and he walked over to Peter and you watched as they did their complicated handshake. They’d claimed otherwise when you’d said exactly that, stating it was just advanced, which you’d said was just geek for complicated. 

You snorted as they did their little finger guns. “Dorks,” you muttered. But you loved it. 

“You can say that again,” MJ agreed, and you knew she loved it too. Staring at her for a few seconds, you launched at her with your arms open and pulled her into a tight hug. She tensed up right away. “I know of your aversion to physical touch, but right now I don’t care,” you murmured, “you’re my best friend and I love you.”

To your surprise, she relaxed into your hold and even hugged you back. “I know I give you a lot of shit,” she whispered back, “but I love you too. All of you. And I’m gonna miss you like crazy.”

“We’re definitely gonna hang out, like all the time, don’t even worry about it.” You reassured her. It was already a pain that Peter would be so far away, you weren’t going to take your closer friends for granted.

She hugged you tighter, “I’m gonna hold you to that Y/L/N.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way, Jones,” you pulled away and gave her a wicked grin which she returned. Peter approached the two of you, placing a hand on your shoulder he said, “Ned just left.”

“Bye Parker,” she held out a closed fist for him to bump with his, “you’re pretty decent. She bumps you up to Okay.” She nodded towards you which made you blow her a kiss. 

Peter chuckled as he fist-bumped her. “Thanks, MJ, I actually think you’re pretty great.”

She nodded, “Yeah, whatever. Still pretty decent.” She moved past you guys and waved as she exited through the door. 

Peter sighed and leaned his head over to press a kiss to your hairline. “Hey,” you started, “at least you're ‘pretty decent’ Ifeel like it could’ve been worse.”

“That’s actually exactly what I was thinking,” he said as the two of you walked out of the ice cream shop. You laughed and leaned in closer to him. “I’m not ‘pretty decent’ to you am I?”

You looked up at him seriously, “Do you think I’d be here right now if you were?”

Peter laughed and you could see those crinkles around his eyes that you loved so much. You always measured how good your jokes were by how deep they were and right now, they were pretty deep.

He squeezed your shoulder, “Whatcha staring at Ace?”

You shook your head, “Nothing, you’re just really pretty Peter Parker.”

You could see him blush out of the corner of your eye and it made you smirk. He smiled again, deep and beautiful as ever, and the crinkles were back. “I think you’re prettier Ace.”

Shaking your head, you smiled, “Not a chance pretty boy, you’ve got me beat.”

Peter’s face turned beet red at the nickname and you knew you won. “Hey,” he said in a voice that let you know he was trying to change the subject, “you what you said to MJ back there? Did you mean it?”

“Mean what?”

“Well, you told her she’s your best friend.”

“Okay…” you trailed off as you weren’t quite sure what he was trying to get at.

“Well, I thought I was your best friend.” That made you smile, but when you looked up at him again he was doing the opposite and you just wanted to kiss it away. 

“Petey,” you said softly. You would’ve laughed if he hadn’t genuinely looked so dejected. “You are my best friend and so is she. It’s like how Ned is your best friend, but that doesn’t mean I’m not your best friend too. I think a person can have more than one best friend.”

He frowned and it was obvious your answer didn’t appease him. “Ned is not my best friend.”

Your mouth fell open. “What?! Of course, he is Peter, what are you talking about?”

He shook his head, “But he doesn’t outrank you. He’s my friend but you’re more.”

Now it was your turn to frown, “Outrank? This isn’t a competition sweetie. Where’s this coming from?”

He sighed and paused his walking. You leaned in and pressed a palm to the side of his face. “Peter,” you pressed in a gentle voice. 

He turned his head and pressed a kiss to your palm before sighing again. “I’m sorry, that was stupid, it didn’t even make sense. It’s just…everything is changing, y’know? And I’m scared. ”

Your heart twisted. “I know Pete, it is scary. But we still have each other, this doesn’t have to change anything. I’ll always be here for you no matter what, no matter how far away you are. Plus, we still have all summer before we have to worry about that.” You gave him a small smile. Peter stared at you for a moment and the silence made you anxious. His eyes looked sad like he was already saying goodbye. Finally, he leaned in and kissed your forehead.

"Promise me no matter what, you'll remember I'll always be your friend."

Your brows furrowed but you agreed. "Of course, I promise."

He blew out a long breath and pulled you into a hug, “I love you, Ace. Always.”

“I love you too Peter.”

Today was the day.

Today was the day that the past twelve years of your life had led to. All those sleepless nights, insanely late nights, hours upon hours spent hunched over books and worksheets and essays. This is what they were for. 

You had woken up early to get ready, but also because you couldn’t sleep you were too excited. You had already done your hair and makeup and were scrolling on your phone until it was time to get dressed when a message from Peter popped up on your screen. 

morning ace ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

MORNING !!!!!!!

excited huh?

SUPER !!!!!

i love you

cant wait to see you

The plan was for Peter and May to come over and take photos before you all left for the actual ceremony. 

I LOVE YOU MORE XOXO

literally, what are you waiting for come over right now 

way ahead of you

Right after you read the text there was a tap on your window, making you jump in surprise. You rushed over and pushed it open, letting him in. 

“Hey Ace,” he said, pressing a kiss to your cheek. 

“That was quick,” you replied. 

He sat on your bed and patted the spot next to him signaling for you to sit as well. Taking up the spot beside him, you grinned at him and leaned in to pinch his cheeks. “What’s wrong Petey? Aren’t you happy you’re graduating?”

He smiled but his eyes didn’t crinkle like they normally do. “Hey,” you pressed with a gentler voice, “sweetie is something wrong? You can tell me.”

He blew out a breath and fell back onto your sheets. “I don’t know how.”

You played on your stomach and propped yourself up on your elbows, “That’s okay, we can figure that out together,” you ran a hand through his hair, admiring the softness of his curls. You always liked it like this, and when he got it cut, he’d started to keep it a little longer than he used to because he knew you liked it. 

He looked up at you and you realized how tired his eyes looked, he must’ve been spending more time on patrol lately. You made a mental note to make sure he spent the rest of the summer sleeping well.

“How did I get so lucky to have you?” He murmured and you felt your face heat up at his words. 

“I don’t know,” you shrugged, “wished upon a star maybe?”

He grinned. “Maybe, because there's no way you’re not magical.”

You matched his expression as you leaned down and pecked his lips softly. When you moved to pull away his lips chased yours, refusing to let you go that simply. 

Somehow, you don’t even remember how, you’d moved and suddenly you were straddling his hips and his hands cupped your ass. You moved one of your hands up to his hair, letting your fingers slightly tug at his curls, making him groan into your mouth. 

You could feel his hands gently pulling you down and you obliged, grinding on him as your lips attacked each other. All of a sudden, those same hands on you were being used to flip you over and the next thing you knew, Peter was towering over you, panting, lips plump and red, face flushed, and eyes hazy.

You pulled him back down but there was a knock at your door, making you both jump. Quickly, you held up a finger to Peter’s lips, making sure he didn’t make a sound.

“Y/N honey, are you up?”

“Yes Mom!”

“Alright, well get dressed and come out for some breakfast, we’re gonna need to leave soon.”

“Okay I’ll be right out.” You waited until you heard her footsteps retreating before you moved your finger. “Sorry about that.” You whispered. 

“It’s fine Ace,” he smiled and leaned down to press kisses all over your face and neck. You giggled but then remembered he came over for a reason. 

Pulling him back by the hair, “Wait, Pete, what was it you wanted to tell me?”

He stared at you in shock, as if he couldn’t believe you remembered. “No um, actually, it can wait. Go eat breakfast,” he kissed right beneath your ear, “I’ll see you in a little bit.”

You grabbed him and pulled him in for one more long kiss. “I love you,” you smiled sweetly at him, “and I’m so proud of you.”

He stared at you for a moment before he grabbed both your hands in his, “I love you so much Ace, and I need you to know that please.” His expression was almost pained, as if the thought of you doubting him for even a second caused physical hurt. 

“Of course I know that Pete,” you frowned slightly. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine.” He smiled. Or tried to smile, because once again those crinkles beside his eyes that you loved so much weren’t there, and you had a feeling there was something he wasn’t telling you. But you trusted him, if there wassomething that needed to be said, he would’ve said it.

“Okay,” you leaned in and kissed him, “I’ll see you later.”

“Bye Ace,” he said and walked to the window before crawling on the wall. The first time you’d seen him pull out that trick you’d told him he looked like a lizard. 

Finishing getting dressed, you stepped out to have a quick breakfast so you could see Peter faster. Soon, Peter and May were in your apartment and she and your parents were all fawning over the two of you. Peter had given her his camera and she was on picture duty for the day since he would be occupied. 

“Okay enough,” you said, taking off your cap and situating your hair. “It’s graduation you guys, not prom. Enough with the poses.”

“Oh, we all remember that,” Peter rolled his eyes making you smirk. The three of them had driven you guys insane with all the poses, the fussing, your dad’s jokes. And you and Peter had surely antagonized them to no end, rolling your eyes and grumbling. It was almost like being split into teams, sometimes, and you found it disgustingly cute how May got along so well with your parents and you and Peter always had each other’s backs. 

“We should probably get going, we don’t want to be late,” your mom spoke up and you shot her a grateful look. 

Peter looked at you. “You’re riding with me?”

Grinning, you answered, “Duh. I’ve got the playlist completely ready.”

He beamed at you and held out a hand, “Let’s go graduate Ace.” You took his hand and shot a smile over your shoulder towards the rest of your group. “See you!” 

“Be safe!” You heard your Mom yell at the same time May said, “Drive carefully Pete!” But you and Peter were bounding down the stairs, your faces lit up like the 4th of July.

“Do you have the keys?” You asked him once you stepped out the door of the building. He smirked at you, “I thought we get there another way,” he flexed his wrists. 

“Absolutely not, Peter.” You backed away from him, “Possibly the worst time to swing anywhere.”

He laughed and grabbed your hand, pulling you into his hold, “Relax Ace, I was only joking.” He fished out the keys to May’s car from his pocket and waved them in front of you. “I can’t wait to hear your playlist.” He dropped to give you a kiss before leading you to the passenger’s side door and opening it for you. 

“Good,” you smiled as you pulled your seatbelt on and reached for the aux cord. “‘Cause I’ve been working on this for weeks.”

Peter just smiled from beside you and started up the car as you pulled up your playlist. “Okay, I know this probably fits more for after graduation, but I’ve been dying to play it so we’re listening to it now and on the ride home,” you informed him before pressing play on ‘The Spins’ by Mac Miller.

“Whatever you want Ace,” he said as he placed his hand on the head of your seat, turned his head, and turned the wheel as he backed out. Blood rushed to your face as he pulled the car out of its designated parking spot. “But I wanna hear that One Republic song.”

You knew which one he meant. “Already in the playlist and cued up to play next pretty boy.”

He smiled softly and shot you a look from the corner of his eye, “You’re absolutely perfect, y’know that Ace?” Reaching over the center console, he grabbed your hand and intertwined your fingers. 

You lifted your enjoined hands and pressed a kiss to his. “I know, and you’re not too bad yourself Peter Parker.”

He squeezed your hand and held it tight for the rest of the ride as you sang your heart out as if he was scared that when he let go, he wouldn’t have the privilege anymore.

When you arrived at the school, Peter rushed out to open your door and the two of walked hand in hand to the auditorium where all the students were to be gathered until they walked out to the football field where the ceremony was being held.

Entering the auditorium, the place was flooding with students and as soon as you saw MJ you were flying out of Peter’s grip and pulling her into another big hug. 

“There’s gonna be a lot of these,” you warned her. 

“You wouldn’t be you if there weren’t,” she remarked but held you just as tight. 

The two of you took a seat over by the chairs while Ned and Peter hung out closer to the doors. As you were talking with MJ you noticed that it looked like they were in a deep, heated conversation and…were you crazy or did Ned keep glancing at you?

“Any idea what they’re up to?” You nudged MJ and jutted your chin in their direction. 

“Probably talking about how their bromance will make it through thick and thin,” she rolled her eyes but when she noticed you still staring confusedly in their direction she placed a gentle hand on your shoulder, “Relax Y/N, really, I’m sure it’s fine.”

You could’ve mentioned how Peter had been acting weird for weeks now, that he always seemed to be in a different placelike something constantly plagued his mind. You were sure if anyone had noticed it would’ve been MJ since there was no one you knew who was quite as observant as her. You could’ve mentioned these things and tried to gauge her opinion on it, but just as you were contemplating whether or not you should, your principal walked in and started guiding you all to the doors. It was time. 

As students began filing out into the hallways, it was hard to keep track of anyone in the wide array of blue caps and gowns. You had a funny thought of how it kind of looked like a tsunami. 

You needed to find Peter and wish him luck one last time, the poor boy had been basically losing his mind for the past few weeks leading up to today and you wanted to make sure he was alright. Standing on your tiptoes looking around while everyone moved ahead, you finally spotted him.

Shoving your way through the bodies you made your way right beside him. “Hey!”

He jumped a little, looking paler than he did before and your heart deflated seeing how affected he was by today. “God, Ace. Scared me.”

“All those super senses and for what? Anyway, listen,” you placed your hand on your shoulder and pushed him so the two of you were to the side of the hallway and the rest of the line moved freely. 

“Peter, are you okay?” You asked in a more serious voice, hoping he would just come out and tell you what had been bothering him.

You had no idea why but his face got even whiter. “What do you mean? I’m fine.” He chuckled nervously. 

You sighed and gave him a big hug. “It’s gonna be fine Pete, pretty soon we’re gonna be high school graduates driving home.” You grinned up at him. 

He tried to reciprocate, he really did, but you could see the strain on his face while he did, which only tugged on your heart more.

“I know Ace,” he pressed a kiss to your forehead, “come on, we have to take our seats soon, I don’t want you getting in trouble.”

You wanted to make a joke about how you weren’t sure you could even get in trouble anymore, but it felt like the wrong time. As the two of you walked onto the field, you kept looking up at him but he wouldn’t meet your eyes. You couldn’t wait for this to just be over so you could get your Peter back. 

There was a stage set up at the head of the field, with chairs flanking each end and a podium in the middle. The stage faced all the chairs for the graduating students, which is where you would be in a minute, and the bleachers, which werebehind them, were where all the friends and family were sitting. 

Peter walked you to your assigned seat and you pulled him into one last hug, “I’m proud of you Petey.”

He squeezed you so tight you wondered if he knew you’d be seeing each other right after this ceremony. “I’m prouder than you’ll ever know Ace.”

You waved him off with a smile on your face as he made his way through the crowd. You took a deep breath as you sat down, in a few minutes, your principal was up there giving some speech that you zoned out of in favor of finding your friends in the mass of blue all around you. 

You found MJ with no problem and she flipped you off as soon as she caught your eyes, and you gave her heart hands and a cheesy grin in return. Ned wasn’t far from her and you gave a little wave which he returned with a sad half-smile. Weird…but it was Ned so you didn’t take it to heart. 

When you saw Peter he was already gazing at you with an unreadable expression. Hoping to ease him up a little, you sent a storm of air kisses and you watched as he laughed and pretended to catch them all. 

Pretty soon they were calling the names. You clapped for everyone, cheering a little for kids you were closer with, but going all out for your closest friends. 

When MJ was called up you were hollering like a maniac, smashing your hands together as hard as you could. When it was Ned’s turn you whistled as loud as you could and when Peter was called up, you jumped up, lifted your hands over your head, and screamed. 

You watched his knowing smile as he made his way across the stage, he’d heard you, and after he’d trapped his diplomahe caught you staring and mouthed an ‘I love you’. You smiled happily as you blew him more air kisses. 

You didn’t have it in you to be embarrassed at all. Everyone was going the extra mile to cheer on their friends and whileyou might’ve tried to be less obnoxious on any other occasion, it was your graduation and Peter deserved some obnoxious cheering for how much he’d been stressing lately.

When it was your turn the cheering was returned tenfold. Peter, Ned, MJ, and all your other friends were clapping and yelling for you. You spotted your parents sitting with May in the back and you waved to the three of them excitedly. You heard Peter give an extremely loud whistle as you grabbed your diploma and shook hands with your teacher, which made you grin absurdly. By the time you made it back to your seat your face hurt from smiling so much.

You were buzzing with excitement as you waited for it all to be over so you could go and celebrate with everyone. It seemed like a lifetime till you heard the huge “Congratulations!’ on the speakers and everyone was standing up and throwing their caps into the air. 

The atmosphere was amazing, everyone was buzzing with an energy different than you’d ever felt before and you knew right then, you’d always look back fondly at this moment right now. 

MJ was beside you in an instant and you almost burst into tears at the fact that she was the one to hug you this time. “You were taking too long,” she mumbled and you felt a few tears slip out. 

Soon Ned and Peter were on the two of you and you shoved into a big group hug, which had MJ rolling her eyes. “I only wanted her,” she stated, but you knew that wasn’t true. 

You slipped out when you noticed Ned and MJ congratulating each other and took that as your chance to tackle Peter in a huge bear hug. 

“You finally did it!” You laughed, arms hooked around his neck as he lifted you slightly. 

“We did it, Ace,” he said and you almost melted into a puddle right then when you pulled away and noticed he was smiling. The crinkles were back. 

But they didn’t last long. 

The two of you made your way over to where your parents and May were awaiting you and they all pulled you into a fierce hug. Your mom was a mess and you tried to calm her down telling her if she didn’t stop, you’d be crying right beside her. Your dad was a little more composed but you could still see the emotion on his face. “I’m really proud of you kiddo.” He mumbled as he held you tight. 

“Thank you, Dad,” you sniffled a little. You were barely out of that when May was crushing you with her arms, making you laugh. She was always good at that, cheering you up. 

“I can’t believe you just graduated high school!” She said in disbelief. “I know,” you replied equally as confused. 

Laughing, she pulled you in tighter and pulled Peter in as well. When you looked up at him he looked a little green in the face, making worry flood through you completely. What could it possibly be now? You had yourself convinced, and he did too, that it was just nerves about graduation, that the celebration was reminding him of the reality of growing up and your lives truly starting was hitting him a little harder. You thought that once it happened he’d relax a little and give himself a little time to breathe. Apparently not.

You pulled him away once you weren’t out of May’s grasp and she was talking with your parents. “Peter,” you whispered, your voice filled with worry for him, “you have to tell me what’s going on.”

“Yeah,” he croaked, eyes turning slightly red which didn’t help your anxiety at all. You watched as he stared past you andwhen you followed his trail of sight, you saw May staring at the two of you with a solemn expression. 

Oh no.

You knew in your heart what was about to happen, and yet you wished with everything in you that it wouldn’t. 

“Come on,” he mumbled, grabbing your hand and leading you back towards the school. You followed him wordlessly as he opened the door and pulled back into the halls, the same halls you had comforted him just a bit ago, before the two of you had officially graduated you realized. 

“Peter,” you repeated, a little breathless this time because no, there was no way. He couldn’t be doing this right now, not…not after everything. 

“Ace,” he sighed and rubbed the back of his neck, looking away. 

“Peter,” you repeated but your voice was harder this time, letting him know that you were done with him beating around the bush. If he was going to do this, he could come right out and say it. 

“I leave in 2 days,” he said quickly. It felt like a slap to the face.

“What do you mean?” Your brain couldn’t comprehend what he was saying. 

He continued as if he hadn’t heard your question, avoiding your eyes as he did so. “Well technically I leave tomorrow, but I arrive the day after so…? I’m not really sure what—”

“Peter!”

He sighed and grabbed your hands, looking you in the face. “Ace, I am so sorry, like so, so, sorry. I wanted to tell you sooner I really did, and I tried! But every time it felt like it would just ruin everything and I couldn’t, I couldn’t ruin it, so I waited and—”

“Peter I swear to god if you don’t tell me exactly what the fuck you're talking about I will leave your fucking imprint on one of these lockers.”

You watched him gulp and you felt a strange sort of satisfaction seeing how you scared him. “I’m leaving,” he said in a quieter tone. “I got accepted into one of Duke's scientific summer programs and I leave tomorrow.”

It felt like a fucking punch to the gut.

“What program,” you said in disbelief, your mind reeling with all this information. “You never said anything about a program.” You looked up at him with a hurt expression. 

“Ace, you’ve got to believe me when I tell you I thought I had no fucking shot getting in, I mean,” he squeezed your hands as he spoke, “really. You should see how exclusive these things are. I wasn’t even going to apply but the dude who gave me my tour around campus convinced me, and then I forgot about it until I got the email, and—”

You shook your head quickly, trying to comprehend everything. “Wait but your tour was months ago.” You looked up at him. “When did you find out you got in?”

His eyes widened and your heart fell at the realization that he’d been keeping this from you for so long. When he didn’t answer you pushed “When Peter?”

“Not that long, I promise, probably a few weeks but I just—it’s been driving me crazy how to bring this up. There was no right time, I mean, I didn’t want to do it before graduation—”

“Well how thoughtful of you to wait till right after,” you snapped back. “No, really, didn’t even give me a chance to get out of the cap and gown!” You pulled away from him and scoffed, not wanting to be anywhere near him.

“Come on Ace, please,” he pleaded, and you dropped your head into your hands. You didn’t want to cry, today was supposed to be a happy day, and it had been! Before all this. 

“When do you leave?” You whispered. You were sure he’d mentioned it but you were also sure your head wasn’t working right. 

“Tomorrow. At night,” he spoke in an equally quiet voice, as if the softer the sound waves, the softer the blow they would deliver. That wasn’t true. 

You held back a sob.

“When do you get back?” An equally important question.

“I…I don’t. The program ends as soon as school starts…May’s shipping my things there.”

It felt as if he was physically tearing your heart out of your chest and stomping on it.

One day. All this time you’d been shoving away dealing with the reality of the situation because you wanted to be able to enjoy your summer, because you believed you still had summer left together and now he was taking that from you. It didn’t even feel like he had pulled the rug out from under your feet it felt as if he had shattered the whole ground. 

“Congratulations Peter,” you said sincerely. This was breaking your heart but deny that this was an amazing opportunity. If anyone in the world deserved it, it would be him. 

“Ace wait,” he moved in front of you, grabbing your chin and lifting it so you had to see his sad face. You wished he hadn’t, you didn’t want to watch him cry. “Please don’t be upset, I won't be able to go if you're mad at me.”

“Well I am upset Peter! Not that you got in, I’m so excited for you, but you didn’t tell me, and you leave tomorrow!” Your voice broke and you could stop the tears as they flooded your eyes and streamed down your face. How could this be happening? Everything was perfect and now this?

Peter pulled you into his arms, “Please don’t cry Ace,” he begged, which in turn only made you sob harder. “I’m so sorry, so sorry,” he murmured as he kissed the side of your head.

“But this isn’t forever. I’m going to come back and I’m going to find you,” he pulled away and held you by the shoulders, making sure you were looking at him, “You’re the only person I want Ace, you’re the love of my life. And I don’t want to hold you back from the amazing life you're going to start at Columbia, I can’t have you going to your dream school with one foot out the door,

“We’re going to grow and learn, and I might not be there for all of it, but we’re going to be together eventually because I want you. This is just goodbye for now.”

You closed your eyes and savored his words. You wanted nothing more than to believe every syllable. 

“Promise?”

“Of course Ace.”

And maybe if you hadn’t been such a fool in love, maybe if you hadn’t been so desperate to hang on to anything that promised the two of you would find each other again, you would’ve known promises like that were rarely lived up to.

hey, sorry but i can’t make it back for winter break. weather issues :(

Your heart fell. 

You were so looking forward to this, seeing him again, spending time with him and May, for things to feel like they were, even if it were for a brief moment. 

You took a deep breath and stared at the two presents on your nightstand. No point in them now. You had gotten the message earlier this morning, around when he was supposed to board, but your phone had been dead.

that really sucks pete, im so sorry

maybe next time <3

He didn’t respond, the only indication you had that he’d even seen it was the little read receipt at the bottom of your text, glaring at you mockingly. You remembered sometime last year when he’d confessed you were the only person he turned them on for.

“Wait why me?”

“You can’t seriously be asking that Ace.”

“Well…I am asking.”

“Because I love you, duh.”

He hadn’t turned them off. You wondered what that meant. 

You knew you shouldn’t have gotten your hopes up, knew you shouldn’t have gotten so damn excited, but…god, you really thought things were going to change.

But he had still wanted to see you, he’d still asked you to come over, and it wasn’t his fault his flight got delayed. Talking yourself up a little, you put on your shoes and coat. Grabbing your phone and the presents, you left your dorm. You were going back home, you could drop off the presents at May’s, stop by and see your parents, maybe call Peter if he was feeling up to it, let him know you really had wanted to see him and you were sorry you couldn’t.

It was cold outside and you could see your breath fogging up before you as you walked, but not of it even so much as fazed you. Hope was a beautiful thing, it could change lives, and it was so, so important. Hope was going to be what got you through this time without Peter, and it was going to be the thing that brought you back together. 

Because you believed. You believed him back on graduation. You believed that that hadn’t been the end of your story, itcouldn’t have been. You believed when he said he’d come back for you, that you were the only person he wanted, because you felt the same. And…maybe right now he physically couldn’t but that didn’t mean he didn’t want to. You believed andyou hoped. With your whole heart you—

You stopped in your tracks. It felt like your breath was snatched from your lungs and was being held just above your head, so you couldn’t reach it no matter how hard you jumped. You couldn’t believe your eyes. 

Because when you turned the corner, you saw Peter walking down the street beside his Aunt, laughing like he hadn’t justcompletely shattered your heart. 

What?

You scurried backward, still unable to catch your breath but thankfully aware enough to make sure you got out of the way before either of them could spot you. 

Leaning against the wall of the building behind you, you finally let out a breath, watching silently as it floated and then dissipated before you. He was here…

And he didn’t want to see you. 

You tried to rationalize it as you looked around, it was clearly snowing, and it was getting thicker by the hour. So it wasn’t far-fetched that his flight really was canceled, plus he had sent you that message earlier this morning, so it was equally possible that he might’ve boarded after all, or found another flight altogether. 

And maybe through all that commotion, he had forgotten to update you. Highly unlikely since you’d never known Peter to forget anything, especially when it came to you. But…you’d also never known Peter to lie, not without good reason at least, like about being Spider-Man, or that time Ned got him a birthday gift he didn’t really like, but said he loved it anyway, or any other time he’d lied for the sake of either keeping someone safe, either emotionally, physically, or both. 

He didn’t tell you, and it hurt. But something deep inside you trusted him. Maybe it was naive, maybe it was wishful thinking and nothing more but you knew Peter. You’d know him his whole life and never once would you think he purposefully did something to hurt you, hurt your feelings, or anyone’s actually. 

Looking down at the wrapped-up present you held, your heart tugged a little. You’d gotten him a Lego set, it was a Map of the Constellations Lego set and it was customizable, so you’d made sure it had all of the ones he’s taught you about. The ones you’d stayed staring at for hours on that hill, talking about everything. It even came with customizable Lego people, which you’d made look like you and Peter (or as much like you as you could with Lego bits), and a little telescope.

You felt like a total idiot.

You could’ve gone anyway, could’ve walked right up those stairs, could’ve said you were there to visit your parents andPeter wasn’t the only thing waiting for you here. But while you may have been feeling idiotic, you weren’t a completeidiot. You knew when you were unwanted. Even if he had just forgotten, if he really wanted you there, he would’ve remembered. And he didn’t.

You were tired when you got back to your dorm. Dropping off the presents, (Peter’s going under the bed, you didn’t want to see it at all, and May’s going on your desk. You’d take it with you when you went to exchange gifts with your parents). It was empty and you were thankful that Lindsay wasn’t there. She was a sweet girl, very bubbly, and you could definitelysee the two of you being friends if you ever got to spend more time with her, but for tonight, you just wanted to be alone. 

The end of your bed was against a window and you were grateful for it. Ever since things went south with Peter, you ended most nights sitting at the window. You didn’t know what it was, but you always found yourself looking up at the sky. Maybe it was the fact that anytime you needed him, he would be out your window in minutes, if not seconds. It could be that the sky always reminded you of him. But you figured the simplest answer was probably the right one. You missed him.

 It didn’t matter which window, it didn’t matter where you were, sometimes in certain buildings you could barely see the sky. Most times, you couldn’t see any stars at all. Almost every time. But it didn’t matter. Without fail, every night youwould look out the window.

Maybe you’d see him swinging around, maybe you’d catch a glimpse of those stars you both had loved so much. You weren’t really sure what you were waiting to catch. You silently hoped the silence on both ends meant nothing and he still felt the same. You hoped he meant what he’d said to you all those months ago, that he really would come back and find you. Even more, you hoped that what had happened that night was a dumb mistake, or at the very least had a solid excuse to back it up. You knew teenage romances were almost always doomed, but isn’t that why you’d broken things off? So you both could grow, and earn perspective, learn more about yourselves, and when you met again, you’d share everything you’d learned. Every new experience that had ultimately led to the reunion of the two of you. You could handle this for now, the not being together, if it meant you could have him later. That all this waiting and hoping wasn’t for nothing. You had to hope that even though you were leading different lives, in different galaxies, you both clung to the same dreams, otherwise you’d already lost him. 

You supposed that’s what you sought comfort in every night. You’d look up at the sky and know it was the same one that blanketed him, wherever he was. You shared the moon, the stars, and your hearts. 

You were always a dreamer, a hoper. So without fail, every night, you’d turn on your lamp and sit by the window. 

read part 3 here!

‘seasonal' taglist: @keira-kaz2y5 @imafangirlofeverything

[luna-rainbow]

Hi! I don't know if you have already read this Bucky's "analysis": https://www.tumblr.com/dreadnought-dear-captain/651270983166132224/cw-this-essay-is-about-about-trauma-including?source=share

I find it absurd that a person who claims to be knowledgeable in the psychological area and also to have lived through traumatic experiences themselves, can say that the depiction of therapy in TFATWS is OK and that it is "right" or "healthy" for Bucky to "take responsibility" for something he had no agency in. This is one of the many aspects that seem to me to be terribly wrong.

I'd be very grateful if you could share your opinion.

Sorry for the late reply, life’s been really hectic lately!

I vaguely remember reading this back in 2021. I don’t know if I ever got through the whole thing. I’m not trained in psychology so I can’t pretend to be any sort of expert.

There are some points I agree with, particularly to the headcanon that Bucky is actually very resilient rather than “fragile” — he has to be, to have lasted that long under Hydra, retained most of his innate willingness for good, and for Hydra to have been forced to use the methods they did to break him. While we’re on this topic, it’s not uncommon that people who leave abusive situations go through a period of “fragility” or being more open with expressing their vulnerability, because they’ve finally exited survival mode. I’m always soft for recovery fics where Bucky clearly has that stubborn resilient streak but also lets himself be vulnerable in front of someone he trusts.

It's not the first time that a self-proclaimed psychologist has tried to justify Bucky's arc in TFATWS with reclamation of agency (I feel like I've read a similar essay from someone else). My problem with these analyses has always been - Bucky is not a real patient, he's a fictional creation, therefore any talk about his psychology and in particular internal consistency can only be as good as the narrative. When you have a narrative that is as clunky as TFATWS, where it clearly made no attempt to consider Bucky's past, character, and motivations in many of the choices he made, it's ridiculous to examine this Bucky as though the writer had intended him to be a study of trauma recovery. It's like trying to debate the safest speed the Titan submersible should have descended at, when the real problem is that it's a creaking tin can from the get-go.

The problem with the reclamation of agency argument is the same problem with his healing arc. Just as Bucky already reclaimed his humanity and social connections by the support he got from the Wakandans, Bucky also already reclaimed his agency in the preceding movies. Are we forgetting his first act of disobedience to his handlers in pulling Steve out from the river instead of finishing his mission? Past that, he spent two years living a crime free and reasonably cosy life. He had a roof over his head, he was dressed clean and groomed, he was going out and conversing politely with shopkeepers, his apartment was sparsely furnished but lived in. All of these took a series of careful choices from someone who not only was forced to live with no agency for 70 years, but also had no identity, no documents, no money, and likely very little familiarity with this new world he's woken up to. He also made major choices that directly impacted the world around him, whether it was to divulge the location of the other Winter Soldiers, or joining Steve against the other Avengers, or choosing to go back to cryo, or accepting T'Challa's recruitment to go back onto the battlefield. He was not forced in any of these choices, and he had a lot to lose in each of them, but he still made the choice -- and the people around him, Steve and T'Challa, allowed him to make that call.

So yes, theoretically, if Bucky was a real patient, of course agency is a major theme in his recovery and a way to redirect away from overwhelming helplessness (although...Bucky's never acted as though he falls comfortably onto learned helplessness; again, the first thing we see him do as soon as he recalls any inkling of his past is to take agency into his own hands). But narratively? This is just regressing Bucky back to...oh, I don't know, early post-CATWS and retreading the recovery path he had already demonstrated.

And sure, trauma recovery is something that happens over a long period of time and people can vacillate between well-adjusted and emotional wreck, and we can argue given the events of Endgame, there's good reason for Bucky to have rollercoasted to an emotional slump by TFATWS. But - once again - this is a fictional construct, and if you took a step back and looked at the narrative as a whole instead of "Bucky should be allowed to make bad choices because he's mentally ill", there is no character justification for why Bucky would break Zemo out of jail or fight with Wakanda, very borderline justification for why Bucky would confuse the shield for his friendship with Steve, and minimal justification for why Bucky would crash Sam's mission in the first place. Not to mention the 20 things that doesn't make sense about the Flagsmashers and post-Blip world, and what authority Sam and Bucky were even working under. If the overarching narrative doesn't make sense, what even is the use of trying to rationalise his actions in a psychological sense?

As to your specific point about "the depiction of therapy in TFATWS is OK and that it is "right" or "healthy" for Bucky to "take responsibility" for something he had no agency in" - I'm not sure how it's argued in the original essay because I don't want to read the whole thing, but this feels like a really weird therapeutic strategy. If we equate Bucky's situation to rape - which we probably can after they inserted the stomach turning scene of Zemo selling Bucky to Selby - I'd like to know which therapist would sit with their rape victim and say it's "right and healthy" for them to take responsibility for the rape, ie the situation during which Bucky had no control over his identity or wishes. From what I've seen and read of victims in recovery, whether that's as survivors of abuse or rape or homocide, they find solace in taking control of the emotions they are left with in recovery -- i.e. the grief or rage or indignation, and repurposing that into a sense of mission, such as starting victim help groups or campaigning for policy change or fighting to get the criminals arrested. But again, that's not reclaiming the situation as something they had "responsibility" for, but rather to make the best with their experience and being a safety net for others. But that hadn't been what Bucky's therapy was about, Raynor was basically implying Bucky was dangerous and out of control and needs to make amends to prove himself stable. It wasn't about unravelling what Bucky feels about the long helpless 70 years of imprisonment and redirecting it to a sense of purpose, it was to make Bucky "pay back" the other victims...as a parole condition to make him suitable for society.

So no, it was not an appropriate therapeutic intervention, because at no point did it have Bucky's best interest at heart, nor - based on Sebastian's portrayal - did it have Bucky's buy-in. And as I've always said, it was also incredibly unfair to the other victims on the receiving end of Bucky's unexpected appearance and "amends" without any sort of neutral mediator.

[vettelinyourarea]

lavender haze - toto wolff

genre: fluff, slight angst(?)

word count: 1,061

inspired by lavender haze by taylor swift

warning: s-word, age-gap, english is not my first language

this is the first fict i've ever written

Meet me at midnight

Staring at the ceiling with you

Oh, you don’t ever say too much

And don’t really read into

My melancholia

You have been seeing Toto for a couple of months now. Nothing official, just a little date here and there. One day though, when you and Toto went on a date in Monaco, you both were caught by a paparazzi and it’s messy from that point. 

Here you are, at 2:30 am, sitting in your bed, mentally debating whether to send the message you have typed to the man you have come to care deeply in such a short amount of time.

I don’t think I can handle this, Toto.

By 3:00 am, the man himself is standing at your door. You didn’t expect him to be awake when you send the message 30 minutes earlier. But here he is, hugging you in your bedroom. Holding you while you cried on his chest. 

You have come to realized how different your lives are. Him, being the team principal of a big Formula 1 team, he is used to the media and the press. He is used to all of the public attention. But you’re just a student. Taking your master’s degree, you are not used to the public attentions and the press. 

But he’s here, comforting you. He’s here, coming to your apartment at 3 am just because you texted him. He’s here, despite all of the crazy schedule he has tomorrow. And he’s here, hugging you, comforting you, whispering to you.

“You’re okay, love. I’m here, I will always be here with you.”

I’ve been under scrutiny

You handle it beautifully

All this shit is new to me

I feel the lavender haze creeping up on me

When you first agreed to go on a date with Toto, you knew your relationship would not be the easy one. Having a relationship with someone way older than you is not easy for anyone, let alone the fact that he is a popular Austrian billionaire that will always gather a lot of attention wherever he goes.

Slut, gold digger, you called it. You knew some people would call you those disgusting things the moment they caught glimpse of you two holding hands. But knowing the fact in advance doesn’t make it easier for you. But still, neither of you care about the public perceptions. Because you and Toto knew for a fact that your feelings for each other is real. Both of you have fall in too deep with each other. You both also knew for a fact that the relationship you both have currently would become official in no time. 

The hate, the criticism. Those things only make you fell deeper for the man who is currently sleeping besides you.

All they keep asking me

Is if I’m gonna be your bride

The only kinds of girl they see

Is a one night or a wife

I find it dizzying

They’re bringing up my history

But you aren’t even listening

Going out on a busy weekend night is definitely not your smartest decision. But do you care? Not really. You do get annoyed when paparazzi started to follow you and ask questions about your relationship with Toto. Even though the guy is not even with you at the moment. You would have no problem to talk about the man you have grown to love, but not with them. Not in the situation like now.

You and Toto have officially been in a relationship for 6 months now and the press knew it already. But all they keep asking you is when are you and Toto going to get married. As if marriage is the only kind of romantic relationship. Of course, you grew tired of it, but you held on, not telling Toto about how uncomfortable you are.

But when the press starts to bring up your past relationships, all hell break loose. Toto was the first one to found out about the articles. No, he is not mad at you, of course. “I’m not mad at you, love. Why would I be mad at you because of your past? You are mine and I am yours now,” he said when you asked him.

And that is the truth. He is mad, no scratch that, he is furious at the media because why would they dig deep into your past life? You are not a public figure. You are in the public light because you love him. “I’m sorry that you have to go through these because of me,” he said one night while holding you. “Why would you apologize? I chose to love you first,” you had answered. And he kissed you softly as a reply, and you feel one single tear from his eyes, drop on your cheek. 

Talk your talk and go viral

I just need this love go spiral

You and Toto were having dinner at his house when he first asked your permission to talk about your relationship publicly. People knew about your relationship, of course, but neither of you have ever talked about it to the public. It was one year after your relationship become official. With his age, you knew your relationship with him would get serious very quickly. 

You also don’t care if your relationship become public or stay private, really. You just want to love him and be loved by him. And you already knew how in love he is with you, even without announcing it to the world. You don’t care about what the public thinks of your relationship. With that being said, of course you let him to talk about it.

So, on the next day when he has an interview, he openly talks about your relationship for the first time.

“Yeah, she’s everything I need and she’s the one who keeps me sane in this crazy world.”

That lavender haze

I just wanna stay

I just wanna stay

In that lavender haze

You are sitting with Toto in your shared house. After 4 years of dating and 2 years of marriage, he somehow still managed to give you butterfly. After all those years together, he somehow still managed to take your breath away when you looked at him. Even after all those hard years together with him, you both are still in that lavender haze.

[oh-no-its-bird]

Tora gets hit w the time travel beam *gestures vaguely towards the "team ro time travel to warring states era but make it Tora AU team ro" post*

And gets mistaken for a bastard senju kid and missing brother of Tobirama bc of the resemblance. But also using the same logic I used w Itachi of the "the only people allowed to draw the connection are people who personally knew Tobirama when he was Tora's age (which, if sticking to the original team ro prompt, would be like 12) so only like. The founders + Touka get to make that conclusion

Him 🤝 Tenzo -> getting mistaken for a Senju and getting lots of hugs from Hashirama that make them Feel Things (TM)

People are telling Tora he's probably a bastard kid and he's making deliberate eye contact w that one time he tried to break into the senju compound and was kicked out bc the gates keyed into senju blood specifically. He's pretty sure he's not a senju guys. Trust him. Really.

Mmmm ok but actually taking it seriously, how would Tora affect the team ro dynamics in that specific adventure? In my original post I went really in depth on what each character thinks of their situation + the founders, so would that change at all?

On top of that, since it's a few month before the Uchiha coup, it's also peak Itachi-Tora-Shisui chaos hours as they plot to stop it

I think it's mostly the same, tho maybe Tora's general affect on Itachi means he isn't quite so much in the "Hey what if we just kill Madara. What then." boat

But also I can see the opposite, with maybe Itachi instead getting Tora on the "Hey what if we kill Madara in his sleep" boat

Shisui can sense the "Tora and Itachi are doing something alarming" button being slammed in the room over and investigates

Oh my god worst possible outcome: they get Shisui on board too. I can see it tbh, they were looking for ways to avoid the coup and the possible village retaliation and like hey !!! Opportunity they sure as fuck won't be getting anywhere else!!!

Plus like, play into the "Itachi rarley offers his own opinion bc he trusts Tora and Shisui to be in charge, but when he does offer it he's listened to"

Well he sure did offer his opinion!! And he sure is being listened to!!!

They actually all just feed into eachothers stress and decide that yes. To avoid the Uchiha coup and or possible village retaliation (they dont know the massacre is on the board yet but suspect smthn similarly bad), this is the best choice to make.

It turns into Kakashi having to talk them all down (whether he does so in time or not is debatable)

They get stopped, obviously, (tho actually commiting to killing off Madara like that would be very funny) and Madara assumes it was Tora's idea bc hes a clear leading figure in the trio and the other two are Uchiha. Tora is willing to take the fall for his friend, but Itachi is not

Itachi has a whole breakdown and bursts into awful messy tears for the first time since his father took him out to a battlefield as a child.

It's a whole thing and everyone is horrified (Tora and Shisui especially but even Madara + whoever else was there are cringing awkwardly at the sight of a previously blank faced little kid just. Loosing it.)

Itachi confesses to it being his idea and, at this point we're past the time travel reveal, explains he just needs to make sure Madara doesn't freak the fuck out and inevitable fuck over the entire Uchiha clan w a shitty reputation that haunts him for years to come

Madara is horrified what the fuck

Also INCREDIBLY demoralized ab the village now, what do you MEAN he fucking left it what do you MEAN originally Izuna died (they were keeping them in the dark ab everything future-wise other than just the fact that the village existed but this kind of forced the lid off that pot)

Also note: Kakashi !! Was !! Not !! Aware of this !!! Holy shit kids !!!!!!

They end up having a whole Thing(tm) about how look even if Madara one of the causes of their shit reputation,,, it can't all be traced back to and blamed on one man. That's not how politics work you guys.

(Queue shocked Pikachu faces and disbelief of three teenagers)

Kakashi, having his own special front row seats to the Konoha politics and rumor mill + yondaime's student + experience with facing the worst of it bc of his dad, giving them some sort of speech about scapegoats and politics and the soul crushing realities of systematic oppression and blame

It's a learning experience.

[thetravelingtyper]

On the same page...(Simon 'Ghost' Riley x reader Bookshop! AU) pt 9

Late Friday morning sees book club, deliveries, and a surprising confession...

Chapter inspired by @glitterypirateduck 's Simon challenge!

Part 8, Part 10, Masterlist

Warnings! A little angst relating to a past relationship

AN As mentioned above this is inspired by the Simon 2024 writing challenge here! They mentioned it can be a part of a series and the prompts are just what I needed to do this chapter! Prompts used include: 2,8,20,27,80,95 (listed at the end to avoid spoilers lol they all go hand in hand)

-

Simon finally departs later Friday morning as the store opens later than normal due to the conversation. By the time you open the doors a few usuals are waiting with coffee from the close cafe. Simon presses a kiss to your temple before stepping out into the cold. You watch his form blend into the people on the street before turning your attention to the needs of your customers. 

Kyle lingers, talking with Sofia in easy conversation while the store fills with eager people. There is a thrum of excitement as people gather around as Sam starts an older book club in the open area where the chairs and coffee bar are located. Sofia and Kyle find themselves soon handed copies and you chuckle from the counter as they are pulled in. Kyle, like Johnny seems to be well-read and contributes well to the conversation. It soon drowns into background noise as you work the counter. 

 -

The conclusion of the book club is signaled by a steady stream of people leaving. A few familiar groups wave to you with easy smiles, each carrying a copy of the book provided in the sign-up for the session. You hear laughing and Sam approaches with Sofia and Kyle. The guys seem to be debating elements of the plot and Sofia passes them shaking her head.

“Endless debates these two.” 

“-I am just saying they could have extended the second act of the book a little more.”

“To what end There was enough development already, doing so would have cut the third short.”

Sam weights Kyle's response then nods with an,

“I guess you're right.”

Kyle grins as they make it to the counter. 

“Glad you see it.”

He turns to you with a smaller smile,

“It was nice to finally put a face to the name.”

“Likewise Kyle!.” 

He motions to set the book back on the counter but you mention for him to keep it.

“Consider it a gift.”

He nods in thanks and turns to leave before something catches his mind.

“Johnny invite you to the bar Saturday?”

You nod,

“I thought so, he was excited to introduce you to everyone. Anyways, have a good day!”

The three of you wave him out, a rush of cold air entering before the door is closed again. Sam has a residual smile on his face that makes you chuckle.

“He’s nice” Sofia comments as she gathers her things as well. You tilt your head,

“When will I see you again?”

She looks at her phone. With James coming there was a lot to prepare for the encounter, both mentally and physically. Mostly it was Sam’s family to prepare. When they had taken you under their wings they learned of the story, that alone souring their opinion of working with the American firm. But as you thought, and Sofia herself explained, this would be excellent publicity. Your books found success here but this would only expand that. 

“Sunday morning or afternoon. I am sure I’ll be pulled into a meeting with James’s team before I can make it here. I’ll keep you updated this time I promise. Have a good day you two.”

With that, she makes her way out of the store and into the cold leaving you and Sam at the counter. You come around to lean against it next to Sam. He watches you knowingly before wrapping an arm around your middle and pulling you in for a side hug. 

“It'll be ok somehow I know it.”

You think of Simon for a moment, the comfort of his presence and the others you’d met. You smile then,

“Yeah, I think in the end it'll be fine.”

-

The rest of the day passes into early evening. Customers come and go as the weather remains overcast and drowsy. You stifle a yawn as the clock turns to 4:50. You and Sam decide to just have dinner in the shop and remain open until late to counteract the late morning. You make the announcement to the pleasure of the readers in the sitting area. The group of usuals, a few older ladies smile at you as you work to make tea. You hear the door chime and you call out a “be there in a moment.”

There is no reply and Sam is in the shelves currently assisting a customer so you turn the corner to be met with…sunflowers? 

Standing in the center of the entryway is a cold-looking woman in a suit holding a vase of not just regular but annual sunflowers. She looks around, seemingly in awe of the store before centering her attention on you. Her eyes light up in recognition and she calls your name in an American accent. 

“There you are, Ma’am! It was difficult navigating here.” The smile that lights up her face is genuine and you feel like you recognize her. Your mind flashes through the faces of your old firm and then, recognition. 

“Mary?” You ask in question as the door dings and Simon in a leather jacket enters holding a small box. Mary turns and startles a little at the man as you come forward to help her.

“These are for you!” She shakes off the surprise and moves forward to you, setting the vase gently into your quickly opened arms. The familiar smell brings back memories as you give a small smile at the bright petals before you look back at her. Mary was the assistant to the head of the children’s department and one of the few coworkers who had reached out to make sure you were ok. While you wouldn’t call her a friend she was easily an acquaintance. She smiles at you,

“Courtesy of us at the children's department. Sarah said they were your favorite and she is excited to see you but,” her smile straightens into a semi-sour look.

“I was asked to pass this along, I’m sorry I couldn't say no.” She pulls off her backpack, a leather thing more like an adventurer’s rucksack and you can’t help but huff a laugh at the combination with the suit. Mary sets the backpack down and opens it pulling out a box and something shielded by brown paper. She straightens with a disgruntled huff, that of a mandatory messenger, and holds out the items to reveal a jewelry box and a fresh cut and blooming white rose wrapped in paper to shield it from the cold. 

Your free hand goes to your mouth at the bloom, a sense of awe at its beauty but a nagging feeling gripping your heart. You look at her and ask,

“Is it?”

Mary nods and you bite your lip.

“He asked and I wasn’t in a position to say no, though I'd like to shove it…” She grumbles the last of it as you turn to set the sunflowers on the counter, before your back in front of her and gingerly take the items from her like glass. There is an envelope tucked into the paper with the rose you notice, a small elegant thing with a shimmering J.M. embossed on it in gold. The items feel like stone and you slump, not expecting nor wanting to deal with this. Nonetheless, you give Mary a tight smile and she returns it with downturned lips but she offers a smile after a thought.

“We’re rooting for you back home. Some of us considered transferring. If you decide to come home Ms. Williams would see to it you are transferred to somewhere good.”

You consider it for a moment, what if you could go home? That was a thought you file away as you feel a presence approach. Simon is at your side then, murmuring a hello and setting the small box down on the counter next to the sunflowers. He nods a greeting to Mary as she looks up at him and his closeness to you with curiosity. She is about to speak but checks her phone.

“I have got to run but it was good seeing you. Sarah will be in town by Monday for the tour.”

“Thank you for this.” You nod to the sunflowers with a smile and Mary nods before glancing once more to Simon and heading out into the evening. You stand for a moment in silence just looking at the rose and the box before sighing. Simon watches you move, minding the sunflowers to sit down on the stool behind the counter and gently setting down the wrapped rose and velvet box.  

Simon approaches the counter and watches you put your head in your hands in thought while you gaze at the rose. The meaning was not lost on you, your first book featured the language of flowers and James would match flowers to different days. A white rose while often meaning loyalty, can also symbolize new beginnings, Your heart curls and you feel tears threatening to well up. You thumb the rose while you pull the small envelope free and brace yourself. You swallow thickly before opening the envelope only to find a small piece of fine paper. You recognized it as something you had gifted James a long time ago for notes. It's what is written on it that makes your heart clench.

Written in beautiful looping cursive, one you know took his focus and full attention was a quote from your first book,

“...and at the end of things, the dragon dipped its mighty head,

“What a mess I have made.”

The queen looked up with a newfound grace and replied,

“All endings, no matter how dark, lead to new beginnings, you are forgiven.”

Could you ever forgive me, my Love? 

You pull back at the sound of footsteps as Sam finally approaches the counter and you look up to him with pained tears in your eyes. Sam freezes catching the initials on the discarded envelope before he grits his teeth, he is about to approach but he looks at the customer with a frown on his face. Sam sends a pleading look to Simon and the other man nods.

Simon rounds the counter to your side. In a gentle voice, he calls your name and you look up into the warmth welling in his eyes. His arms come around you and he murmurs,

“Let's get upstairs dovie.” 

You nod into his chest clutching the box and the note. As he backs off you stand and take a shaky step towards the open door. As you pass up the stairs Simon is your shadow, a hand bracing at your elbow. Reaching the top, Simon reaches past you to open the door. His chest brushes your back as you walk forward a little aimlessly. Taking point an arm wraps around you as Simon leads you to the couch and lets you sit quietly before taking the spot next to you. You just hold the note, reading the lines over and over again. With a shaking hand, you open the box, and on a silver chain, his, silver chain is your engagement bands. Your hand shakes as you grab the chain from the box, the note forgotten as it slips from your fingers.

-

As you leave with Sam, you pause, tears streaming down your face you as everything you had built over the years came tumbling apart. You step into the living area twisting your ring off and setting it down gently before walking out.

-

The silver glittered like a faded star in the warm light, Flashes of lights and the swirls of gemed color matching your dragons. You hold the chain as a life line just gazing into the past. Your heartbeat hammers as your mind clouds into static. As tears stream down you face a large hand comes over yours. 

-

“You need to mourn this, not just work!” Sam follows after you as you grab a handful of old writings and pace.

“Get out Sam!” You raise your voice and sanp at your best friend but he only crowds you,

“When will you cry?”

-

Simon’s other hand gently closes around the rings, you hear a voice but its a mumble against the static. A hand traces up your arm, coming to your wet cheek and turning your face to his. Pale skin, soft hair and his lips are moving, then your eyes trail up to his. Its tigerseye you think, the flecks of gold in his eyes, smoky quartz or moonstone and you are drawn to their light like a moth, the light dancing golden beads in his eyes. You hand relaxes then, dropping the rings into his palm as you slump into his chest and finally cry.

Simon’s other arm draws you close, his hand cusping the back of your neckas you cry into his shirt, shoulders shaking with sobs. His heart hurts then he realizes, hearing you cry. He grips the rings until his fingernails and the silver digging into his palm hurts. He lets you cry, sobs rattling your soul as you mourn what you had lost. 

Your home, your career, your love, your mind murmurs. What had you done but turn tail and run? Why didn’t you fight, gnash your teeth and bite back.  You heave. Then what was the ‘kindness’ of Sabrina, the gentle pecks and “everything is ok?” Your breathing pushes in to a panic. Why hadn’t you seen it? The distance, the call the…?

“Dovie” The voice is firm, but soft, and a gentle lift from the static as you blink in the hiccup of tears. You pull back and find tender eyes gazing down at you, Simon hums, feeling it vibrate through your chest,

“There you are Muse, I’m here” 

Simon’s voice is husky as his hand moves to hold your face gently as he brushes away a stray tear with his thumb. You gape up at him at the nickname, hushed by the gentleness with which he speaks. Tears trickle down your face as you breath deeply in and out your nose trying to catch your racing heart. As you look into his eyes, feeling the pain mould around your heart, you wonder why?

It tumbles out of your mouth then as a hot spark of anger ignites.Why? Why had this happened, why did you have to leave, why did he dare come, why break your heart? The hand clutching the rings moves then, you feel simon move his arm and set the rings gently aside on the table before his hand takes one of yours. Your train of thought derails at the contact as he connects your foreheads, eyes calling to yours. 

He looks at you with Everything, light reflecting like jewels as you can see yourself in his eyes and something hits you like a hurricane as you gape up at him. Who was he to look at you this way, more who were you to deserve it? New tears well up as you doubt yourself and you move to look away but simon speaks,

“Don’t hide Muse, not from me.” He murmurs it as he entertwines your fingers and gratefulness and something sweet bubbles up in your chest and you finally lean into him, savioring his warmth. He watches with relief as your eyes focus on him, finally out of your mind and back in the present. 

You whisper then, a question that has haunted you for the past few days, Why?  

Simon smiles then, small but steady, as he thinks himself, Why?

Flashes of your smile, you engrossed in a book a look of concentration on your face. Most of all though, your love for stories. How you give books to the kids, helping the parents calm the clamoring children. Another time he comes in Sam is running the counter and he turns the corner to a sigh that melts his heart.

You are holding a baby as a mother reads to her children, a soft song on your lips that dances through the air of the bookstore. Once the baby stops fussing you let the mother finish before passing her the little girl with a soft smile. 

Or the day he wandered in to find you hosting a crafting circle for a near by childrens center. Your sitting with a puppet in your hand, using it to guide the glitter usage of a group of children. As he slips into the shelves he smiles at your laughter.

Or maybe it was all Johnny’s fault. The affectionate scot who jabbered on and on about the friend, “a sweet lass who makes the best tea L.T.” Or “Steamin’ jesus Simon these blasted cookies.” Or maybe its was how you made him feel above the clouds, looking past the scars and mask and seeing the man underneath.

Everything here in the city led him to you, he thinks, before speaking,

“I want to be with you.” Before meeting your lips.

Chapter 9 end :)

Taglist!

@ghostlythots, @tapioca-milktea1978, @cmbghost, @nexthyperfix, @feedthefandoms995

#2 A confession is made

#9 Alternate universe

#20 Forehead touching

#27 Nickname - Muse

#80 Soft Simon my beloved

#95 Wipe away the other's tears

[lopez-richter-fangirl]

The Tin Can Bros have launched a kickstarter to celebrate their 10 year anniversary with SEVEN new projects, and they need our help!

Read on to find out how:

This is Brian Rosenthal, Corey Lubowich and Joey Richter

You may know them from Team Starkid, or you may know them from their own group the Tin Can Brothers (creators of projects such as Spies Are Forever and the Solve it Squad), formed in 2014. To celebrate 10 years, they’re raising a goal of $200k in order to stage seven projects

They’re currently a week into their campaign and have raised almost $50k with 675 backers. But they still have a way to go! And to help, we need to spread the word

TINLIGHTENMENT PROMO SCHEDULE:

Saturday 10th - The Great Debate

What is it?

A live comedy game show featuring Joey, Brian, Corey and special guests pitted against each other to win a debate. It gets silly!

How will I be able to see it?

Live shows in LA (and potentially other places!) throughout the year, digital tickets, and eventually some ‘episodes’ on youtube!

What can I share?

If you’ve been lucky enough to see past great debates on Patreon, talk about favourite topics and moments!

If you haven’t, share moments and clips from the first public great debate livestream happening on Thursday! (I think - if plans are changed then they’re doing a terrible job letting me help them)

Talk about guests! They talked about a Dropout crossover which I know people have been asking for with Starkid. I don’t know what that is but tell the people that do!

Tuesday 13th - Gross Prophets

What is it?

A brand new comedy musical featuring Joey, Brian and Lauren with music by Ali Gordon and Angela Parrish (shitty broadway! https://youtu.be/AZ-bOPiDqo8?si=F6guq3Pk_lOkCB5B)

How will I be able to see it?

Live shows (some workshop-y) in LA leading up to a run at the Adelaide Fringe, with digital tickets and eventual youtube release

What can I share?

We don’t know a whole lot about this project yet, but we do know it’s got a great cast and creative team - talk about those people!

That it’s going to Adelaide!! Australia is frequently in the top backing countries on kickstarters, and those people finally get a chance to see a TCB show live!

Theories on what the show might involve!

Saturday 17th - SIS at the Fringe

What is it?

An Edinburgh Fringe run of the fucked up Scooby Doo parody, with the original cast!

How will I be able to see it?

Live shows throughout the entire Edinburgh Fringe run in August, or a digital ticket!

What can I share?

This is an existing TCB property, so talk about what you love from the original! Share art, gifs, edits, anything!

That it’s going to Edinburgh! As above, UK fans have been desperate for this for ages, now’s our chance! Make sure people know about it!

Tuesday 20th - Spy Another Day LA and London

What is it?

A live concert screening (Hollywood Bowl meets Rocky Horror!) of Spies with most of the original cast for LA and TCB plus Lauren for London!

How will I be able to see it?

A live show in LA in Spring (likely April) with a digital ticket option, and a live show in London in early September following their SIS fringe run

What can I share?

Like with SIS, anything and everything you love about the original show! Angsty fics, art, memes, it’s all good

Joe Walker. To me personally he’s just A Guy, but some people are still shocked to be learning he’s doing a show again! Get those OG fans to support this!

That it’s going to London. I need Joey doing a passable to decent depending on how much he’s practiced English accent in London! And again, an opportunity for one of the highest backing cities to see them LIVE

Saturday 24th - TCBoB at 54 Below

What is it?

The songs from their musical This Could Be on Broadway in concert at 54 Below in New York City, with Joey, Brian, Lauren, Esther, Bryce and Clark, plus more performers to be announced!

How will I be able to see it?

Live in NYC in November, with a digital ticket option

What can I share?

The first workshop only got a digital ticket release but if you caught that, share favourite parts! And the soundtrack is available, so talk about how fucking good the songs are

The fact that it’s an opportunity for people to hear these songs live!

Tuesday 27th - Intelligent Life

What is it?

A reading of TCB’s queer sci-fi comedy TV pilot

How will I be able to see it?

Live in LA in early Summer, or by digital ticket

What can I share?

Like with Gross Prophets, this is a brand new (to us) project so we don’t know a lot! But we do know it’s gays in space! We love space gays

Remember, these are just ideas. Share anything you personally are excited for and think other people might be interested in! The aim is to make sure people are aware of these projects, what they entail and why they need to happen! Any other way you have of getting the word out about the projects and the campaign in general is valuable!!

Join our discord for more ways to help or to ask questions! https://discord.gg/4VNEBzpA

And if you’re hearing about all this for the first time, check out the campaign! https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/tincanbros/tinlightenment-world-tour

[tadbitsketch]

accidentally took a 4 hour nap and now i can't sleep so mcsm theory time!

ok so this is kind of something that i never really see be debated in the community, but i do see it be represented in different ways. i'm talking about ✨the parallels between the new and old orders✨

for the most part, we can all agree that

magnus: axel (griefer)

ellegaard: olivia (redstonist)

gabriel: petra (warrior)

which just leaves two characters in each order: ivor and soren, and jesse and lukas.

i keep seeing people represent jesse in soren's place, because they're both the leaders of their respective groups or something like that. but i disagree.

lukas parallels soren much better because they're both architects. they're also both writers who live(d) away from civilization. they also both have a habit of being a little* bit dramatic in their storytelling of their adventures.

so if everyone else parallels each other in their roles... how does jesse parallel ivor?

the funny thing about these parallels is how it's not just in job that they match... kinda.

and i have some fun lil theories/analyzations on this, of which i will share!

theory 1: similar arcs

something really cool about these two (and some other notable characters i'll discuss another time) is that they both have character arcs where they grow and change as people.

ivor's plans of revenge backfire horrendously, and after that problem is solved, he makes new friends. ones who aren't liars, people who genuinely help. they're brave, and they forgive. they're willing to learn and change.

and so is he does too.

meanwhile jesse is a noob who knows barely anything about minecrafting who eventually saves the world. they learn a lot from the mistakes of their predecessors.

both ivor and jesse grow as people because of mistakes from the past. they both are characters who have decided to change things from how they were, whether it be how they were themselves or how someone before them was.

theory 2: creation/destruction

so i came up with this awhile ago, but you can split the members of the order into two groups (based on their "classes," so to speak): creators and destroyers.

olivia and ellegaard make redstone contraptions, lukas and soren build. they are creators.

axel and magnus blow things up, petra and gabriel slay monsters. they are destroyers.

what is ivor, then? his role as an alchemist means that he can create potions to help AND potions to harm. he is both a creator and a destroyer.

and jesse, our main character with quite the skillset (except for alchemy), also fits both the roles of a creator and a destroyer. jesse does whatever the heck jesse wants.

boom. parallels.

and one other funky thing i've noticed

ivor's stone in the amulet is the lapis blue one. jesse's favorite color is canonically lapis blue.

[violetrainbow412-blog]

Day 29: corn maze

Masterlist flufftober 🎀

Reblog if you liked it!

“Are you sure we should go this way? That corner over there seems familiar to me”

“For the umpteenth time today, you can't possibly recognize a place because they all look the same. They are cornfields”

“Your response only confirms to me that we are fucking lost.”

In reality, you knew you weren't lost and even if you were, you trusted that your friend would be able to get you out of there. You and Spencer had known each other for practically as long as you could remember and when he told you that he would be in Vegas for a few days you practically begged him to go out with you. You didn't even care where you guys were going, you just wanted to spend time with him and enjoy the fall weather like when you were children.

In the midst of it all Spencer looked at a sign advertising a haunted house and a corn maze on the outskirts of town and he thought about the last time he had gone to either. He talked to you and in the end you decided on the second option, feeling an adventurous spirit that was not very fueled right now.

“We’re not lost. I have an eidetic memory and I know perfectly well that since we arrived, we have made one turn to the right, three to the left, we walked forward along the path on the right side, then we made another turn to the left…”

“Yeah, yeah, I get it,” you whined, smiling slightly at your friend’s jabbering. A couple of people walked past you and waved at you, looking a little more lost than you.

Spencer was wearing a long coat that day, a garment you weren't very used to seeing him in, a themed scarf and a pumpkin-colored hat that you had knit for him a couple of years ago but that he still seemed to appreciate.

“Don't worry, these camps always use a Global Positioning System with satellites to help identify the location of all the people in the camp and are designed so that you can leave halfway if you panic.”

“This reminds me of that novel by King and his son, In the Tall Grass, have you read it?”

"No. Is it good?"

“It's a little scary if you live in the country. Or if you go into a corn maze, like a couple of fools thought of it” you joked and that seemed to amuse your friend, who giggled.

You moved a little closer to him and decided to wrap your hand around his arm, an approach that he gladly received.

“I'm glad we're here, I really wanted to see you.”

“I know, you hardly come to Las Vegas anymore. When was the last time?"

“Eight months and thirteen days”

“Too long,” you said, with a certain melancholy, and Spencer raised his opposite hand to put it on yours, as if he wanted to apologize for having taken so long to return.

“To the left,” he murmured kindly to you, pointing his head in that direction.

“I'm following you without questioning you, you know? If we get lost, I won't even know."

“We arrived at the third checkpoint, right there,” he pointed out, with a proud smile. “Relax, don't you trust me? I am a genius"

“You're a show-off,” you laughed, resting your head on his shoulder for a second and feeling his do the same on the top of your head.

It felt good to be with him like that, like two old friends who know that no matter how much time passes, things won't change at all between them. You didn't know it, but Spencer had been going through a lot these past few months, and being with such a familiar face comforted him immensely, as if he could remember a time in the past that seemed happier and simpler.

“I think it's this way!” you heard next to you. It was a group of teenagers who were pointing down the path to the left at a fork and who seemed quite excited by the discovery they had just made. “We are going to win, it shouldn't be too far away”

“Stop,” Spencer murmured, surprising you and them. “It's not that way. "You must take the other path”

The young people debated for a moment whether they should follow a stranger's advice or their own conclusions and you believed that, in their place, you would have done the same; I mean, a couple of adults advising them is always strange, since they feel like they know everything in the world. Still, you decided to support them a little.

“Listen to him, we haven't gotten lost even once. He's a genius for these things.”

You almost saw Spencer make fun of you when he heard you call him a genius, when just seconds before you were calling him a braggart.

“What if you are lying to us?”

“I'm so sure it's that way that I'll greet you at the exit,” Spencer responded, with a small smile “It's not too far away, but if you want to take that path and it leads you to nothing, you just need to go back to the right one.”

After thinking about it for a while, the group made the best decision and after saying thank you, they began to walk on the side that Spencer had recommended, where you saw them get lost a couple of seconds later.

“Why did you help them?”

"Why don’t do it?" he responded with amusement.

You continued advancing while you held him and when you reached the place that had caused discord, he guided you to the opposite side where the teenagers had gone. Your brow furrowed and you tried to mutter something, but Spencer beat you to it.

“I know this isn’t where we should go,” he pointed out, as if wanting to calm your questions.

"And then?"

“I thought that if we take the right path, we will spend less time together.”

Your heart skipped a little when you heard what he was telling you and you smiled unconsciously, like you always did when you were with him.

You continued to hold his arm carefully and chatted the rest of the way, not even having to worry about where you were going because you knew that in the end he would guide you to the right place.

And you thought, maybe, that was part of the magic of being with Spencer Reid.

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