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chickenkupo · 5 months

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I Just Want My Tea

Summary:

Wriothesley, the busy man that he is, doesn’t notice that his tea stash is getting rather low, no thanks to Sigewinne taking her share since she considers it payback for what Neuvillette and him put her through once he was claimed. It wasn’t until after a shift at the Fortress of Meropide, however, that he noticed this. After going to the home that he and his mate, Neuvillette, share, he vows that the next morning he will run to the nearest grocery market to take note of their goods, and purchase some more that suit his tastes perfectly. He drools just thinking about it.

However, Neuvillette is starting to feel a sort of odd heat beneath his skin recently, and it only gets worse as the days go by. He constantly finds himself staring at his love when they are together, and when they are apart, he can only think of having his man back in his embrace, littering him with possessive affection and a viscous need. He’s finding it hard to let Wriothesley go anywhere without him, now, this heat feeling like it is reaching its peak.

But, the man desperately wants his tea, and the dragon wants his man. The compromise? Why, of course the dragon sovereign is going to turn into a little noodle version of his full dragon form, and go with him! Why, you ask, would he do this?

Well, how else is he going to pleasure the both of them while out in public?

TLDR: Horny noodle dragon is in his heat and tries to get freaky with his mate while he just wants to do some simple grocery shopping. Chaos ensues.

Recommendations: For full context, please refer to I Promise and Now For the Next Act. This is considered a little side story before I continue on with the next 'serious' work in the series.

Warnings: 18+, though barely. Will be writing up some stuff to add onto this as a second chapter with even spicier content, but this story had to leave my head one way or another. Dubious content, public sexy behavior, slight mind manipulation.

SHOUT OUT TO MY AWESOME BETA READER, Gleth_Eldigande! Please, if you like my content, go and check out theirs here! I promise you'll enjoy it! ALSO SAY THANK YOU! They work hard to keep my lore together and keep me on track!

Author Note: IM BACK BBY! Finally wrote up my Noodle Dragon/Wriothesley story. I made it WAY LONGER than I intended to, but I don't care, here it is! Tumblr is getting 2 day early access to this, after which I will be posting to AO3 because, once more, I cannot write something short to save my life.

Sheeeeeesh, long enough intro, right? Well, let's get to the good shit!

•

Wriothesley groans as he holds his head, a small, yet persistent, headache forming. He knew what the exact cause was, and there was nothing he could do to cure it, currently. He had a few more appointments with new inmates to address, assigning them to their roles and housing, before he could leave the rest of the duties to Grace. Thankfully he had a few more moments until the next prisoners arrived for his council. His wrapped hands reached towards one of the side drawers of his massive desk, and after reviewing the contents (or lack thereof) once more, a defeated sigh escaped his lips. His wooden tea box that was consistently managed and previously well stocked had taken quite a hit logistically. He reckoned that he should have taken Sigewinne more seriously when she proclaimed that she was going to do some damage to the supplies.

“YOUR TEA IS FORFEIT!” She screamed, loud enough for Neuvillette to still remember, even with his then feral brain taking over and becoming the overprotective mate that he was now.

The Duke did not take her that seriously after the event, however. Neuvillette had informed him of what she proclaimed, as he was still passed out at the time, his body trying to process all of these new changes and get some sort of semblance of rest, for once. But, as he continued to stare down at the empty contents, he knew then that she kept to her word. He winces, a sharp pain shooting through his skull. Not only did the tea he drank help to calm his nerves after dealing with, to him, ridiculous situations most of the day, it also provided him with a level of caffeine to keep him awake. Now, not having a single drop of tea all day, his body was going into withdrawal. He desperately needed the energy, too. Not only did the constant appointments seem to drain his energy, but he also had the odd situation occurring at home.

Neuvillette, to be completely honest, was going full horny mode on him here recently, and it felt like every night it was getting worse. At this point, from what he experienced last night, he knew that the moment that he walked through the threshold of their home, the hydro dragon would once again pounce on him. The attack being sudden, as Neuvillette would probably assault his mouth with his own, his long dragon tail being released from its glamor spell and then wrap itself around Wriothesley’s legs, and halfway up his torso, holding him in place as Neuvillette would continue his assault. Then, literally get dragged into their bedroom, tossed onto the bed and be devoured as if he were some sort of feast for a god. Granted, Wriothesley loved every single second of it, but it would take so much energy out of him. They’d continuously partake in divine levels of intercourse for the remainder afternoon and well into the throes of night, until it was almost near time for him to get up and return back to the fortress, though he noticed the snarls and hisses thrown at him as he got up and ready. Never threatening to him, but he knew now how dragons would literally throw a hissy fit now. It was cute, yet slightly terrifying.

So, yes, Wriothesley needed his tea, desperately. There was no way he could go through another night of this and live to tell the tale. He’d just have to stop by the grocery building in Fontaine before he headed home. As much as he did enjoy the meals provided to him in the Fortress of Meropide, only one of the grocers in Fontaine had his favorite flavor of tea bags and loose leaves in stock, and he never went down the cheap route when it came to his tea. The man had standards, you know. He’d be a little late getting home, and maybe Neuvillette wouldn’t really notice. It wouldn’t take that long, anyway. Just one quick little trip and return home, snagging a sample of the already brewed tea that they normally had on sample display should be enough to boost his energy levels, somewhat. Ever since his somewhat odd transformation, his body did recover much more swiftly regarding many different levels of exertion, than his previous, normal human body did. For that, he was grateful, though it did take a decent amount of time for him to mentally and emotionally adjust to such changes. Dragons were determined and possessive little fuckers, but at the end of the day, Wriothesley wouldn’t have had it any other way.

“Sir! Two new inmates would like to come in for their meeting, would you care to have them come in now, or do you still need a moment or two?” One of the fortress guards addressed him from the other side of the room. They must have walked in while he was deep in thought, as he didn’t hear their footsteps at all. Thinking about how your horny mate was fucking your brains out the previous night and reliving those clips in your head will do that to you. Wriothesley closed the drawer that contained the empty tea box at his desk, and did his best to put on a look that didn’t show the now throbbing headache he was suffering from.

“Go on ahead, let them in, let’s get this done and over with.” He almost grumbled, pulling out their files and taking a brief overview before the two entered his office.

The Duke had barely finished his sentence before two figures came barging in, the guard having to help press against the two individuals to keep them at a respectable distance from Wriothesley. Not so much for his safety, but rather theirs. Wriothesley did pack a rather ferocious punch, but little did everyone know that he had an even more ferocious hydro dragon that would spill blood in less than a heartbeat if even a hair on Wriothesley’s head had been damaged. But the citizens of Fontaine didn’t need to know about that, not quite yet.

“WHY IS HER ASSIGNED BED LARGER THAN MINE? HER CRIMES ARE WAY WORSE THAN MINE, THIS ISN’T FAIR!” One of the women screeched out, pushing against the guard with each emphasis.

“WELL HER MEALS ARE BETTER QUALITY THAN ANYTHING I HAVE HAD HERE SO FAR AND I DEMAND RETRIBUTION!” The other woman rang out, also pushing against the poor, singular guard, who was doing a rather fine job of holding the line. They might need a raise after today.

“S-S-SIR!” The guard yelled out, looking for any sort of instruction or assistance in the current matter.

The Duke merely sighed, shaking his head as he crossed his arms over his broad chest, the migraine now pulsing.

How the hell was he supposed to survive today?

•

What should have lasted five minutes felt like it lasted five hours. In reality, it did turn out to be a couple of hours that Wriothesley had to sit there, trying to make sense of the situation and figure out the best way to handle it while the poor guard held the two women back from causing not only a fight with Wriothesley, but also between each other. Grace, having stepped in to take over when she noticed she had not been called after, had truly saved him that day. He swiftly exchanged information with her, and eased himself out of the room while the Melusine tried to calm the entire situation down. At first he was nervous for her, but after turning around and looking at her crazed expression and wicked smile about facing a new challenge, he blinked, gave her a thumbs up and headed out swiftly. He didn’t have much time to spare at this point, or at all, so he needed to make this trip quick.

As much as he hated using the teleport points, mostly because it always left him with such an odd dizzy feeling after reaching his destination, he didn’t have much of a choice this time around. Touching the teleport point at the Fortress, he concentrated his energy to focus himself to travel to the central hub of Fontaine, where the shops were only a short walk away. The blue aura took over him as he closed his eyes, and felt his entire being travel from one distant location to the other. He wasn’t sure what else he could describe the sensations he was feeling when this happened, other than he felt like he was displaced in an unknown area before his being settled to where it should be. A part of him wanted to figure out the mechanics of these one day, but sometimes it was better left unknown and to just be happily taking advantage of its properties.

As his body settled in the heart of Fontaine, he doubled over for a second, holding onto a concrete railing to gather himself. Normally it wouldn’t have affected him so badly, but with the thudding pain in his head still present, it only amplified the uncomfortable sensations he was going through. Wriothesley took a moment to take a deep breath, hold for a few seconds, and then slowly exhaled. He found that helped him level himself after teleportations, and it did end up alleviating a little bit. He would have normally spent more time taking it easy for a few more minutes, but he didn’t have that luxury at the moment. He was late, still needing at least a smidge of caffeine at this point, and he had a nagging feeling in his soul that Neuvillette was not happy with him not being at their home. He was seriously fucked, not that he really minded that, but he’d rather not pass out the second they get started. Oh no, he was going to wear that hydro dragon out if it was the last thing he did.

Once he fully gathered himself and his surroundings, he hurriedly walked himself closer to the grocer. Luckily, they were ones that stayed open later than the usual surrounding vendors, so he still had some time. Wriothesley noticed that the surroundings were getting darker, the sun must be setting. His suspicions were confirmed as the outdoor post lights that littered the city began to glow, offering a new form of illumination for those out wandering about. Yeah, there was no way he was going to make it back at a reasonable time. He cursed to himself but accepted the circumstances. Now wasn’t the time to wallow and be mad, he needed to get in, grab as many of the peppermint tea bags as he could, and bail. Wriothesley looked up and saw that he was maybe a half a block away at most, before something suddenly came crashing into his side, sending him flying into a nearby alleyway. He gasped and braced himself for impact into the concrete below, but was shocked when he noticed he didn’t feel any pain, just a very familiar weight on top of him. He didn’t even need to look up to notice who was now straddling him in the dark and hidden alleyway.

“For fuck’s sake, Neuv! Really?!” Wriothesley fussed at his mate in a harsh whisper, eyes narrowed at the dragon that was laying on top of him, noticing that he was in a more half transformed body. His horns were showing again, his hair more unruly and trailing down further, eyes more feral, fangs showing and a faded mirage of his actual draconic tail whipping back and forth behind him; a dragon studying his prey.

It took a few seconds before Neuvillette replied, a hiss escaping his lips as his words left his mouth. “Yes, really…”

Wriothesley rolled his eyes, and then tried to push the man off of him, who didn’t budge at all. Blinking in confusion, and then trying again, he got the same result, with a hint of a growl from the man above him. Neuvillette lowered his head and started nuzzling down on Wriothesley’s neck near his mating mark, purring again, looking very reminiscent of the day when the claiming took place. A part of Wriothesley wanted to fade into bliss and let the hydro dragon have his way with him, but for now he had more blood rushing to his brain than his cock, which was starting to get harder by the second. They couldn’t do this out in the open, and Neuvillette sure as hell couldn’t reveal his form to the citizens of Fontaine like this. Well, brute force obviously wasn’t going to work. He had only one plan left that seemed to snap Neuvillette out of his feral fits like this, and technically it was true.

The Duke lifted one of his hands slowly, running it through Neuvillette’s hair, in a calming manner, letting him nuzzle further into his neck and breathing in his scent. The massive amount of heat radiating from Neuvillette indicated to Wriothesley that whatever he was going through was getting worse, so hopefully it wasn’t too late for him to listen to reason.

“Babe, please. My head is throbbing right now, and I need some caffeine, okay? It’ll help lessen the pain and I can uh…actually be awake and last for what you got planned, eheh…plus, can you put away the whole…dragony bits? This is not the way to really reveal this sort of information, you know…” Wriothesley laughed nervously, his cheeks flushing with an intense blush, praying to the archons that this would actually work.

Neuvillette immediately stiffened as the words settled into his brain and he fully comprehended the situation, but the heat within his body was unrelenting. His two cocks, hard as the cement below them, were brushing against Wriothesley’s own erection, still tempting the two of them into further, dirtier deeds. The hydro dragon’s instincts were going wild, demanding relief for the two of them, and Wriothesley, though his scent was incredibly attractive to him, was severely lacking in his own scent being mixed in (even though, to be quite frank, if there were any other dragons around, they could definitely smell Neuvillette all over him), which made him even more irritable. But his mate was correct, and he needed to get himself together. Wriothesley was not rejecting him, and he needed to be a good mate and take care of him.

Almost immediately, the tail that was behind Neuvillette faded back away into nothingness, his horns began to recede, fangs and hair retracting back to their previous forms. A noticeable, and adorable, pout played on Neuvillette’s face as he started to remove himself from straddling his mate, offering him his hand as he pulled the two of them up so they were both standing casually in the alleyway. Wriothesley, as he was shaking the dust and dirt off of himself, started to scan his surroundings. It didn’t seem as though anyone had walked by while they had their little scene, a relieved sigh being released once he realized this.

“Listen, ba-” Wriothesley grunted, knowing he wasn’t whispering now and was addressing Neuvillette properly, as they were in public now and more easily noticeable than before. “Monsieur Neuvillette…” he corrected himself, and cringed at how that sounded now. He knew the hydro dragon didn’t like being referred to in that way by him, but knew that they had to keep up the formalities until the proper time presented itself.

“I’ll be able to come back once I’ve grabbed what I need, real quick, alright? It shouldn’t take long, and then we can go back to…” Wriothesley’s voice trailed, as he continued talking, but Neuvillette couldn’t seem to focus on anything that was being said, as long as it was nothing regarding his health or safety.

Instead, all Neuvillette could do was feel both of his cocks still pulsing, needing friction and release. His skin started to grow hot again at the lack of touch against his mate, driving him insane. He could feel his fangs beginning to lengthen, ever so slowly as he continued staring at the scales that lightly dusted Wriothesley’s skin from his recovered injuries. He had to do something, and he had to let Wriothesley get what he needed.

“I’m coming with you, end of discussion.” Neuvillette proclaimed, ever maintaining the image of a proper gentleman even with the hell he was currently going through, as he cleared his throat and adjusted his garments, slapping the dust off of them as well from when they plummeted to the ground earlier.

“What? No, that’ll take forever! Everyone will want to talk to you! Listen, we’re both struggling here, ba-Monsieur. Go on back, and I’ll meet you there. I promise, it will not take long, okay?” Wriothesley stated, trying to reassure his lover, patting him on the shoulder as an emphasis to this. The Duke thought he was finally in the clear as Neuvillette did not respond, and began heading his way back to his original destination, before he had the oddest sensation run through him.

As quick as he felt the energy in the air, it dissipated, and suddenly he felt something wriggle its way through underneath his jacket and undershirt beneath his vest, and wrap around him like some sort of snake. He gasped in shock, trying to tear open his shirt to see what the actual fuck was going on, and his mouth dropped open as he peered down. This hydro dragon was nothing but trouble underneath all that proper poise and composure.

Underneath all of his clothes and happily coiled around his bare torso, was the hydro dragon himself, in his full dragon form, but…incredibly tiny, like a plushie. His white scales glistened with blue ever so slightly in the little amount of light that was being produced nearby. His little white hair and beard was rather fluffy and tickled his skin, the horns being too dull to prick or poke him, but still noticeably there, and the same with his claws. His tail completely wrapped around his torso and tickled his body a bit as it waved back and forth across his skin.

With an agitated sigh, he glared back down at Neuvillette one last time, who merely placed his scaled chin on one of Wriothesley’s pecs, tongue flickering out and teasing the skin of his mate, looking up at him with large, slit lilac eyes that Wriothesley was all too familiar with. The man sighed as he tightened his clothing back up, trying to ignore the ever present hydro dragon that was now descaled down to a small noodle plushie size and wrapped around him. Yeah, he wasn’t going to regret allowing this to happen at all, but maybe for once the dragon would behave himself.

“Alright, I’ll allow it, I get it, we’ll compromise on this. But if you give me any sort of trouble, I swear…” Wriothesley warned, and knowing his lover, he was surprised when he didn’t hear any sort of feedback. Dragons were rather proud creatures, so a statement against them as such, even from their lifelong mates, usually warranted some sort of warning growl, hiss or light love bite. But Wriothesley felt nothing. Blinking, thinking that maybe Neuvillette was just really distracted with how he had been feeling the past couple of days, he took it as a sign of acceptance of terms, and moved onward to the grocery store.

Oh, how wrong he was. No matter the dragon, they were all the same in this respect. When they wanted something, they got it. End of discussion. Though they do cherish their mates deeply, they were nothing but masters of persuasion and persistence. One way or another, what they wanted would become theirs. Neuvillette was not an exception, even to this.

Even if he was in an adorable noodle form that Wriothesley was secretly gushing about in his mind – it was too cute to handle, but he had to stay focused.

Wriothesley tested the next few steps that he took, making sure to concentrate more on the dragon that had curled around him than the still throbbing pain that he felt in his head. So far, so good. It seemed Neuvillette was content with just having some skin to scale contact. Maybe that’s what he needed all along, or that’s just the level of restraint that Neuvillette had now, knowing that his health wasn’t at tip top shape. He chose to end his logical reasoning, and focused instead on the grocer, who was now in plain sight. The door was still propped open, and the lights were still on inside, some patrons walking in and some walking out with their purchased goods. A brief sigh of relief escaped his lips as he started to walk through the threshold, observing the different aisles of goods, knowing exactly what he needed. He was a man on a mission right now.

Though the building looked rather small from the outside, the inside of it was quite large. Aisle after aisle of consumable goods were on display, one trip here is all you would require for most of your culinary needs. Ranging from fresh meat, to locally grown vegetables and fruits, to imported goods, the store had all that you needed and then some. Since the rebuilding efforts of Fontaine began after the the chaotic events occurred, many of Teyvat’s nations decided to pitch in one way or another and send goods to the local stores of Fontaine, helping to restock whatever goods they had until the nation was able to provide at full capacity for its citizens once more. The citizens of Fontaine greatly appreciated this for many reasons, but one of the major ones was the new type of diversity of resources and food provided. Wriothesley was just one such of these people. Without Mondstadt sending over some of their interestingly flavored tea, he would not have been able to try the peppermint flavor that he now constantly desired. Something about the mint from the land of freedom itself just had that extra fresh and tasteful twist to the brew that he couldn’t find anywhere else. Plus, if he ever had a day when his throat was irritating him (he’s mentally glaring down at the cute but troublesome noodle dragon that was coddling his chest, being the source of these recent moments), it fixed him right up. The Duke was about to walk down one of the aisles to go to the middle of the store where it had a more open view of where the items were located, when all of a sudden he felt a light tapping on his shoulder.

The man turned around to address the individual, immediately on high alert, which faded almost as soon as it had developed. A sweet, gentle smile of a young woman graced him, one that was sadly familiar to him now, but he was used to having social situations like this. He blessed her with one of his trademark smiles, arms crossed over his chest. He did poses like this to give off a rather calm, but stern demeanor. He had a reputation to uphold, after all, no matter the circumstances. But he would be lying if he were to say that this didn’t have a secondary purpose. He had started feeling Neuvillette wiggle against his skin and clothing, trying to adjust himself, he supposed, to get a better view of the situation. Though, that was still rather hard to do with the amount of layers that Wriothesley tended to wear.

“Your Grace, it was indeed you! I just wanted to thank you for your assistance the other day. I know it’s not the best situation, but you’re truly one of the best to handle it. I don’t know what I would have done without all of the help that you and your men provided.” The young woman said, with a sweet, soothing voice. Such a compliment caused Wriothesley to blush ever so slightly. Most people wouldn’t be able to tell, even in bright lighting. But one being could, and that was the ever growing jealous dragon that was snuggled up to him.

Noodlette (Wriothesley was proud of this title he just came up with for him, he’d have to tell him about it later after they got back from pound town), was clearly starting to get agitated. The moment he seemed to have heard that it was a female voice that was close to his mate, a slight hissing sound escaped him. Luckily for Wriothesley, her voice seemed to out-mask his tiny hiss, which irritated the hydro dragon even more. He was well aware that women were of no interest to Wriothesley, but he was also well aware that most people found the man attractive, and loved to have his undivided attention. Attention that should be his, by the way, especially now when his heat was about to be upon the two of them at full blast. Noodlette grunted, and being the needy dragon that he was, started to come up with some mischievous plans.

“Of course, it’s all part of the job, after all. Your brother will be taken care of at the Fortress of Meropide, I swear. But, it’s good to see you out and about. Get your mind off things, you know? People make the wrong decisions sometimes, but we’ll handle it from here.” Wriothesley tried to assure her that no thanks were necessary, it was all part of the job. He was about to continue on with another sentence before he stopped in his tracks, immediately becoming stiff, so much so that the young woman in front of him gasped, reaching her hand out to him to check on him.

“Your grace! Are you alright?!” The woman asked, worriedly.

Wriothesley continued to try to keep himself together, but the sensations were already starting to flood his senses. Noodlette had started slowly licking the skin around his left nipple, lapping the hardening bud up while lightly nipping and pulling on it. Noodlette also had his claws out, though not all full sharpened length, as he slowly dug into Wriothesley’s skin, not enough to break it, but enough for his mate to feel the tension, and slowly started to drag his claws down. The two of them came to find out that Wriothesley loved it when the hydro dragon would release his claws and scratch at him while they were love making. It became one of his favorite things, and Neuvillette didn’t mind at all. The more marks on him to show the world that he was claimed, the better, in his opinion. Wriothesley grunted as he tightened his arms around himself, hoping to constrict the noodle dragon and halt his actions. It worked, for now. Little did he know that the dragon was beaming, having had a naughty moment with his mate, getting him all flustered, and this woman hadn’t achieved that. Plus getting a tight hug like this? The dragon was the proudest he had been in a while now.

Clearing his throat to hide a moan as Noodlette started to slowly inch his claws back down his skin, Wriothesley put every bit of his focus and energy into keeping the conversation normal.

“Y-Yes, sorry about that. I’ve been having a little bit of a headache today, nothing to worry about. That aside, I’ll be sending some update reports your way once your brother gets established at the Fortress.” Wriothesley stated, surprised at his own ability to keep himself together at this point. He could feel the little noodle dragon starting to squirm again, and he had no doubt that his lover wasn’t enjoying the woman’s company, especially being so close when he had one thing on his mind, dicking his mate down hard. The Duke was getting the message loud and clear. Get away from other threats, get the goods and go home so they can lose themselves in feral lovemaking.

The young woman brought her arm back to her side as she eyed him up and down, skeptically, making sure he was indeed alright. After a few seconds of seeing him maintain his composure, she simply offered him another soft smile, nodding her head.

“Alright. I do hope that you feel better, your grace. Once more, thank you for all of the help, truly. I apologize that part of my family caused so much of a mess for you, but hopefully this will all be the proper steps in the right direction.” She concluded, giving a small bow as she eyed him up and down once more, making sure that she didn’t miss anything. But, his stature and expression remained the same as he had given a small smirk, nodding his head in acknowledgement to her. She took that as her dismissal, and promptly left after gathering her small bag of goods and left.

The moment that her presence couldn’t be felt nearby, Wriothesley began to feel an odd, small vibration coming from Noodlette. Blinking in curiosity, Wriothesley peeked downwards and saw that the small dragon was gently rubbing his head against his skin again, purring away, with a big smile. It was almost as if the hydro dragon were just as gleeful as ever, rubbing his face away on him like a cat would their owner. The man had no doubt Noodlette was enjoying himself by staking his claim yet again by scenting him, like it wasn’t already obvious through the faintly shimmering scales that littered Wriothesley’s skin if the light hit them right, or the blue essence that Neuvillette had pumped into him the night of the claiming that was still coursing through his veins. This made Wriothesley think of all the ways the dragon obviously had him as his mate and vice versa, his mind not clearly understanding just how truly territorial dragons were with their mates and close loved ones. In truth, the woman that had approached Wriothesley just moments ago was lucky that the dragon didn’t strike her down right then and there. Dragons, back in prior times, held no mercy against any threat, subtle or not, to their claim. However, that just showed how much Noodlette still respected the position and title of his mate. Though, instincts were hard to completely control, and this was what resulted from him trying to resist them while also giving in a bit, before it all drove him into insanity.

If only Wriothesley understood this to the fullest extent, however. Instead, the man just found Noodlette to be needy and extremely bratty at this point. Though not necessarily untrue, he would find out later that night exactly what this all entailed. That didn’t stop the Duke from continuing to glare down on the blissed out Noodlette, and after looking around to see if anyone was nearby and content when there was not, he squeezed the dragon a bit which earned a little adorable squeak from the tiny dragon, like some sort of plush toy. Wriothesley knew he didn’t hurt the poor little thing, just surprised him.

“What the hell is wrong with you?!” Wriothesley hissed at at Noodlette, who tried to look up at him with the most innocent eyes that he could muster, along with an odd light chuffing noise, which the man assumed was some sort of pouting huffs to emphasize his adorableness and lessen his anger. Wriothesley growled at the minuscule dragon, who then got a cranky face of his own, and growled right back at him, even though it sounded so pitiful. The growl of the dragon eased off into a whimper, as Wriothesley started to feel the whole body temperature of the noodle dragon that had wrapped himself around him start to drastically increase. Noodlette started whimpering even louder, and Wriothesley blushed as he started to feel a rhythmic movement against his chest, sides, and…was that Noodlette’s little tail that had somehow wormed its way past all of his belts and headed straight down his waist?

Wriothesley’s eyes widened as the rhythmic ministrations continued, and he began to hear an odd panting noise coming from Noodlette. Was that also…what was that hardness that was bumping up against him? Wait, what the fuck? Was Noodlette humping him now? Was this what this was?!

“Y-You need to stop that and get it together! You’re such a little shit! Stop it, stop it!” The man growled out, keeping his arms once again tight around his own torso, trapping the little Noodlette to prevent any more movements. The last thing that needed to happen was for him to have a massive boner in public like this and have to provide some explanation to the general public as to why he was walking around a grocery store in that sort of state. The little Noodlette let out a little squeaky whine again, barely audible but with Wriothesley’s increased sense of hearing since their initial coupling, he sure was able to hear it loud and clear.

However, the young little boy that was bouncing between the aisles didn’t notice this noise. He had broken away from his mother, who had found someone that she knew a few aisles down and was doing the classic mom thing of talking for what felt like hours, just to say nothing or discuss boring drama that the little boy had no interest in. None of the aisles had really piqued his curiosity, except for the one with sugary sweets and drinks. His mother had swiftly ushered him away from those, the last thing she needed to deal with was a hyperactive kid when it was close to dinner time as it was. So, the kid ventured away as soon as her attention was divided, and that’s how he came upon the aisle where he saw the strange man, dressed so scarily (and like a badass), in grays, black and reds, with belts and boots to match. He was awed at first, until he saw the odd behavior of the man. He seemed to be hugging himself and muttering some odd words, almost as if he were fighting with himself. What was once awe then turned into apprehension and wariness as the kid started to get a worried feeling about the guy in front of him. He was acting odd, clearly talking to himself, should they call the guards?

The child started to take a few steps away until he accidentally backed into one of the shelves, causing a can of archons knows what, to fall off of the shelf and roll on the ground towards the odd man. The kid's heart began to race so hard he felt like it was about to burst out of his chest and go running down the street. He was frozen in fear as the can rolled right into one of the black boots of the man. The man then whipped around to look at the kid, sharp, gray-blue eyes pierced right through the kid's soul, it felt like, and the kid started to shriek and cry as he ran back towards where he last saw his mother.

Wriothesley stood in place as he was trying to comprehend what was going on, as well as hoping that the kid didn’t see the little Noodlette’s head poking out from underneath his vest, tongue flicking out in curiosity. It took a second for the man to notice the little dragon head poking out, viewing the outside world for a few seconds before he hastily shoved the little scaled head back down underneath his clothes. At first, the dragon tried to fight and push its way back out, but the horny seemed to get the best of him again the second he felt more skin to scale contact. The little dragon crooned as he began rubbing his face all over his mates skin again, tongue lapping out, teasing the man. This made Wriothesley groan as he accepted his fate. He knew there was no trying to calm the little dragon down, he needed to go and get the tea and get the fuck out of here, and fast. He was already starting to make a scene, he didn’t need anymore added to his docket right now.

“Just, just don’t do anything crazy, please, I’m almost done!” Wriothesley begged as he began to race down through the store, heading towards the exact aisle that he needed. He glanced around, sighing in frustration as he noticed some of the items had been moved around since he had last visited the store, the peppermint tea not in the same location as it was before. Luckily, he remembered that the packaging was in a light blue box with a scene of misty mountains on it, and after taking a moment to go back and forth in the aisle, he managed to finally find it. The second that his hands grasped the box, he felt like his migraine was already starting to fade away, the cure was finally in his grasp. Happy, and somehow not becoming a moaning mess at the noodle dragon that was currently trying to tease his nipples again, he began to storm out of the aisle and towards the front of the store to pay for his goods, before he felt a presence in front of him.

“Oh, it’s you! Oh, my son just adores you, he’s always going about how he wants to work at the Fortress of Meropide one day! Seriously, you’re his biggest hero! It’s not often we see you in these parts of Fontaine, can we get your autograph, your grace?” A middle aged woman ran up to him, leaving her cart and child behind, and whipping out a pen and notepad that he saw also had a grocery list on it.

As much as Wriothesley wanted to oblige her, he felt the little noodle getting rambunctious underneath his clothing again. That was never a good sign, he noted. The hydro dragon probably thought this was yet another threat to his claim, which had him mentally rolling his eyes. However, to his surprise, and dismay, it seems as though Noodlette had come up with a new method of torturing him. It was subtle at first, but as Wriothesley was about to reply to the woman, his actions ceased as he heard a weird sort of…tune? Coming from the little dragon. At first it just seemed like a series of growls and coos, but now it started to blend together in an odd, soothing melody that hastily started having his senses be dulled and a light heat pumping through him. He shook his head, holding a hand up to it to support himself as he began to come back to, though not fully snapping out of it.

“Oh! Are you alright?! You must be suffering from hay-fever like the rest of us right now, I know that look anywhere, young man. You need to be getting your rest and sleep! Come, Conner, let’s leave your hero to rest! How else is he going to stay big and strong and keep us all safe?!” The mother stated to her child and she returned back to her cart, trying to usher the two of them away.

It was then that Wriothesley got a good look at the young kid that was with her, eyes wide open as he noticed it was the same young child that he had seen before that ran off, terrified of him. He inwardly groaned, thinking for sure that he didn’t blame the kid for having that sort of reaction, he was a kind of scary guy, especially with how frustrated he was sure he looked after this whole debacle. After the kid realized who was in front of him and his mother, sniffles turned into a full blown crying episode as he clung to his mother for comfort and safety.

“Now, now, Conner! It’s okay, we’ll get his autograph when he’s feeling better, okay sweetie? Who knows, maybe the Duke will feel so much stronger then that he’ll even want to pick you up onto his shoulders, wouldn’t that be fun?!”

The child only started crying harder after hearing that, clearly still terrified of the man, little to the knowledge of his mother.

“Hush, hush! Here, why don’t we go back down the sweet aisle and I’ll grab you some sweet bread, wouldn’t that be nice? That’s my big boy!” the mother crooned, as she gathered her son and started walking down the way towards the desserts and breads. Wriothesley only wished he could give some sort of verbal reply, but that damned song that Noodlette was performing was preventing him from doing so. He was surprised that the older woman or her child couldn’t hear it, which started to make him believe that Noodlette was making this only noticeable through his own hearing.

The little noodle started to unwind himself from his mate, now slithering out from underneath his clothes, head and neck peering out to look Wriothesley directly in the eyes. The duke could only stare and get lost in the piercing, slit eyes of his mate, even in this form. Where they were once wide and adorable to look at, now they held a level of conviction and seriousness, a possessive aura flowing through them. Wriothesley didn’t sense anyone near them, which was a relief, but he was confused as to what exactly was going on now.

To his shock, those same small glowing orbs that had appeared when Neuvillette had first claimed Wriothesley appeared again, and the longer that the man stared at them, the more he started falling under whatever spell that Noodlette was casting upon him. The tune was so coaxing, his migraine, which was still there, had lessened to a dull thud, and the heat that was once pooled in his gut was starting to branch out everywhere within himself now. The song teased him with senses of peace, pleasure and possession, if he would only surrender himself to it. It needed his consent, craved it, and he knew the moment that he gave it, all of Fontaine be damned, this dragon was going to claim him then and there, in front of them all. This was, he assumed, what Sigewinne had once told him about as she had started to study the mating rituals of dragons, especially after what she had witnessed that one fateful day. There weren’t many records, but the ones that did exist, she absorbed their contents immediately.

There was one story that she shared of a dragon’s mating call. Normally, this would be used to lure a potential mate in, but it also served different purposes as well, especially if a mating bond had already been established. If that prerequisite had been met, then the mating call held an overall different purpose. Instead, instead of luring in a potential mate, this call was used to lure their stubborn mate to give into their deepest, carnal desires, tossing logic to the side and also increased the sensitivity within their nerves, guaranteeing that once the mate fully submitted, they would experience a pleasure more intense than ever before, unless the song had been used on them previously. Sometimes mates needed to be reminded of who they belonged to, and when a dragon called out to them with this mating call, they would never forget again.

Wriothesley tried to fight against the sensations at first, but the battle was easily lost. He felt his consciousness flow into a state of calm and bliss that no other sensible thoughts were running through him. He should be resisting, checking to see if anyone else saw this little noodle of a dragon poking out from underneath his clothing to stare into his soul and devour it whole. He should be convincing Neuvillette that this was a horrible idea, that they needed to keep away from the prying eyes of the citizens of Fontaine that were still within the store. He knew at first that this needed to be top priority, fuck the tea at this point, but he couldn’t fight. Whatever energy was flowing through him now, it was as if it were his own blood pumping through his veins. This claim that the dragon had was eerily strong and superior, it transcended anything that Wriothesley could muster against it. It should horrify him, but it oddly gave him a sense of satisfaction and adoration for the hydro dragon. Previously, no one in his life held any high value to him, other than Sigewinne. No one truly cared or wanted the best for him or would be willing to give up everything just to see him smile. He felt that, among many waves of lust and wanting, through the bond that they shared with each other. He, himself, was about to toss every sense of care away and act upon it.

Wriothesley took a few steps forward, now noticing that there was a full body supporting him now, helping him to keep upright. The Duke wanted to raise his head and address the figure, but no words could be formed. The searing heat continued to rage through him, not in discomfort, but rather waves of pleasure. He was about to release a series of moans, before a gloved hand came up to press a finger against his lips, silencing him.

“Shh, my dear, we wouldn’t want you to, how does one say, ‘spill the tea’ now, would we?” A haughty Neuvillette teased, now fully back into his humanoid form. Since his mate received the mating call so well, his body and soul knew that it would be appeased soon, and the primal instincts within himself started to recede, enough for him to drag his prize back into their den for a copious amount of carnal activities.

“Now, let’s go and make a purchase and commence our meeting, shall we? We have some rather important details to go over…” Neuvillette said, again in the same teasing tone as before. He offered Wriothesley his side for support, helping him walk ahead towards the front of the store. Helping was a rather loose term here, however. The call was still playing through Wriothesley’s mind, and it felt like the bond between the two of them was flowing through his body and helping to propel his legs forward, beyond his sense of control, one of his hands holding his head to soothe the dull throbbing that still persisted. Even the mating call wasn’t enough to douse the intense pain. To outsiders, it would look as if the duke were suffering from a casual migraine and the prim and proper Neuvillette was helping him to finish at the store and return back to the Fortress of Meropide as soon as possible. They had no idea that there was a dragon in heat clawing to release and mate with its lover before a feral rage took him over that would level Fontaine as fast as it was rebuilt.

Wriothesley could hear faint mutters through all of the sensations that he was currently feeling. He recognized Neuvillette’s voice easily, but there was another that was there. Cheery, concerned, and businesslike. He assumed that it was the storekeeper, ringing up their purchase and voicing their concerns for him. However, his professional mate addressed the issue, he was sure, as they spent a few more moments there and were ushering themselves out the store, he could hear the bell of the door ringing as it opened, and once more as it closed. It was odd, he couldn’t really sense anyone strongly outside of his mate, but a part of him knew it was still the working of the mating call. He only needed to recognize his mate, respond to him and surrender himself completely to his dragon, and only his dragon.

He felt his body continuing to move on its own, until it suddenly stopped. The hold that was over him was starting to lift now, not completely, but enough for him to become aware of his surroundings. It was now dark outside, the sun must have set while they were inside dealing with each other's shenanigans. The lights of the lamp posts were keeping the areas lit, which struck him with a wave of curiosity. The two of them were currently in front of one of the large fountains within the city square, close enough to feel some of the droplets of water bounce off of the surface and dust their skin. As Wriothesley continued to take note of his observations, he saw that there were a decent amount of people surrounding them, some in small groups and conversing with each other, others appeared to have been walking down the streets connecting to the other parts of Fontaine, while the rest were surrounding the fountain, taking in the beauty of it. But, there was something really odd going on here.

None of the people were moving. It was as if they were frozen in time, but everything else around them was continuing on. The waves of the fountain continued to cause a light sprinkle to grace their skin, and for that Wriothesley was thankful. At least there was something moving and making him feel less crazy, though he had no idea what was going on, yet again. Looking to his mate for answers, he gasped as he saw that Neuvillette’s eyes were glowing bright, pupils sharp as he stared at him, causing shivers to go down Wriothesley’s spine. They didn’t need words between them right now, the bond pulsed between the two of them and gave him all of the information that he needed. Neuvillette had done something to stop everyone from being able to see whatever the hell was about to happen. The duke tried to take a few steps back from Neuvillette out of caution, and that was the absolute wrong thing to do.

It all happened within a split second, a snarling, loud and ferocious growl was released from Neuvillette as he rushed right up to Wriothesley before he could take a second step backwards. Immediately, arms were wrapped around the duke, pulling him so close to the man that their noses were practically touching. The hydro dragon continued with his warning growls, fangs elongated to greater lengths than before, horns protruding from his crown and the dragon tail that was once a ghost form of itself now completely corporeal and wrapping around Wriothesley, holding him tight.

“Wriothesley…” the dragon purred out, with a slight growl towards the end. This made the man weak in the knees, completely thankful that his mate was supporting him with his arms and tail. He felt like such a limp noodle right now, and he knew that fighting any further would not be beneficial to him at all anymore. No, he was prey that was captured now, and he needed to face what was coming for him.

“We have what you need…” Wriothesley looked and saw a small bag attached to his side, it must have been the tea bags from earlier. The man gulped, knowing that he had teased the dragon before and had given him trouble while in the noodle form, a big no-no for the mate of a dragon.

“Now, you must suffer the consequences of your actions, my love. You were late, you did not tell me of your status, and kept me waiting.” Neuvillette continued, as he began to move the two of them painfully close to the fountain that was behind them. Then, a sharp smirk played on Neuvillette’s face as he pushed the two of them into the water of the fountain, Wriothesley’s eyes becoming wide as he wasn’t prepared for his dragon’s sudden motion. The dragon continued to push the two of them into the water’s depths that seemed to be endless now. The Duke could feel the unfamiliar waters turn into ones that he was too familiar with now. What felt like minutes underwater being pushed through by his dragon, then ended as they both breached the water's surface, his body being tossed onto the familiar bed that the two of them shared. It was obvious now that Neuvillette had frozen people in their steps so that they could teleport back swiftly to their den. Neuvillette stood at the door leading to their watery bedroom, as he smirked at his mate, holding the bag with the caffeinated goods inside.

“You’ll have your tea here in a few moments. But I’m going to have you all night…”

Archons, this dragon drove him crazy in every sense possible, and he wouldn’t have it any other way.

#genshin impact #neuvillette #wriothesley #wriolette #ao3 writer #ao3 #neuvillette x wriothesley #ao3 fanfic #writing #noodlette #wriothesely smut #neuvilette smut #dragon smut #sigewinne #noodle dragon #genshin smut

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xotication · 3 months

Note

can u do gamer!kaneki and reader doing a stream where it’s just them goofing off and doing random stuff? like reader does his makeup on stream, smash or pass w anime characters, etc. ofc if you’d like !! thank u ♡

of course! sorry this took so long :(

☆,

as you know, kaneki has been streaming for a while now. his viewers love him, but they also love you! he’s starting to think he can’t have one stream where they’re not begging him to bring you in.

eventually you become a reoccurring guest, no matter what is is you two are doing.

his viewers eventually give you guys ideas of some silly things to do.

like one time you guys had to remake peoples instagram stories. you guys would just scroll thru your mutuals stories & randomly click on one.

it left you guys posting some corny couple photos, random fit checks, your attempts at some of the fancy dinners they were eating, or even random videos between them & their friends.

another time, the viewers begged & BEGGED the two of you to play smash or pass & it was the funniest thing ever.

“okok. uhm, smash or pass satoru gojo”

“smash.”

“hello??”

“what- i can’t smash gojo but you can?? he’s my glorious blue eyed king!”

“YOUR?! ken baby, he doesn’t even know who you ARE!”

“just shhh..”

“ok wtv. smash or pass eren jaeger”

“pass..”

“smash.”

“excuse me? didn’t he commit like every war crime.. ever?”

“ok & he was sexy while doing it all.”

“is that what i have to do for you..?”

“absolutely.”

“you were supposed to say no….”

“oh-”

this continued with a plethora of people & by the end of it, you guys were questioning each other so hard.

some of your guys’ other friends got wrapped into the content. one night you called up hide to test his loyalty.

“uhm- hey hide. is kaneki there with you? he said he’d be hanging out with you, but i haven’t heard from him in hours.”

hide literally requests to facetime you & walks you throughout his whole house to show no signs of kaneki. manz was playing NO games. & kaneki was so heartbroken.

“bro how’re you gonna expose me like that?!”

“bc if you’re cheating on your girl, i’m not gonna help you cover that shit up. be a man, moron”

“ok chill. i didn’t even cheat”

“yeah +10k aura for hide..”

“ok i’m hanging up wtf”

you ended up asking ken if you guys could do a cooking and/or baking stream. but without a recipe, he agrees & this makes for the most viral stream yet.

you have hide and ayato there to let you guys know how much time there is left, to referee the whole situation, & ofc to judge the food

you’re instructed to make pasta, FROM SCRATCH.

things start off well, but when you take a bathroom break, kaneki ends up sabotaging your dish.

he’s adding in a lil bit too much salt to your pasta sauce, & tasting it makes his whole face scrunch up.

when you come back, hide looks so guilty. like he had seen something he wasn’t supposed to see. which was of course, the underlying truth. all the while ayato was there, pokerfaced.

noticing this, you immediately assume ken is suspicious, “kaneki what’d you do.”

“what?? nothing.”

“hide is he lying.”

“i dunno”

“you were here the whole time?! ‘wdym i dunno’ you do know!”

“no i don’t?!”

you decide to let it go.

the whole process is chaotic, but fun. by the time it’s ready for judging, you & kaneki were both stressed out.

making noodles from SCRATCH without a recipe isn’t an easy task.

ken’s plate looked like mario & luigi threw it up, while yours looked like a penguin just regurgitated it to its baby.

you guys place the plates on the dinner table & you sit across from ayato & hide.

“alright chat. the foods done, looking rather.. interesting. i’m a little hesitant & scared to consume this but, we move”

“shall we?” ayato hands hide a fork & they both take a bite from ken’s dish first.

“uh- okay. i mean it’s definitely food. definitely a plate of food, i think” hide speaks first.

& ayato follows up with, “this is awful, ken”

kaneki gasps, almost as if hurt by the words, “okay then try y/n’s!”

& when they do, they’re pleasantly surprised. hide was expecting it to be salty as FUCK. but of course you peeped the chat saying how much salt ken had added. so you just added a shit ton of tomato sauce to even it all out. & it made for a yummy dish!

“this is decent! it’s not the greatest ever, but it’s also not the worst. definitely better than kaneki’s. the noodles are bit easier to chew & the sauce is almost normal”

“so did i win” you asked & ken looked so defeated in his seat..

“uhm. no you didn’t win. rightfully so, anyway.” ayato informs him & you jump for joy!

“you shouldn’t have tried to sabotage me, ken”

“how’d you even know?!”

lastly, one day you were super bored. you didn’t even plan on getting in stream with ken. you kinda just wanted to chill that day. but you chilled too hard. now you were literally doing nothing.

you put your phone down & wiped your eyes after scrolling through tiktok for what felt like hours.

“what to do, what to do” you said to yourself.

an idea clicks & you quickly jumped from your bed to make way to your closet.

you're putting on a cute dress & getting ready for, well, nothing at all. but it's all part of the plan. ken is so wrapped up in his gaming that he takes no notice of you at all. you're at your vanity pulling together the last pieces of your look.

even chat notices before your own boyfriend does, they're thinking ken has to leave soon because you guys are going somewhere but that's not at all the case.

you're stood by the bedroom door, all dolled up & pretty. "okay ken, i'm gonna go to target!" he looks back at you for a quick second & then back at his monitor.

"okay, see you later, love you!"

you walk out the room & ken is reading his chat. "target.. in that outfit?" "bro is not going to target" "bro didn't even see what his girl was wearing" "ken.. she said target, not the red carpet"

finally ken takes a second to picture what it was you were wearing again, & he gets up so fast he almost falls.

mans literally sprints out the room, out the house, & finds you sitting in your car. when you saw him, the last thing you had expected him to do was remove you from the car, & throw you over his shoulder but that's exactly what he does.

ken carries you all the way to the bedroom & throws you on the bed. stream STILL going btw.

"change."

is all he says before he's sat back in his chair, queuing into another game.

most of the girls in the chat are going crazy, rightfully so tbh.

ken looked back at you to see if you had listened, & when he saw you on the bed, still just laying there.. he wasted no time ending the stream.

he began to undress you himself. took off his own shirt, pulled it over your head, & then he took you to the bathroom to help wash your makeup off.

"going to target my fucken ass."

blehhhhhhh

#anime #kaneki x reader #fanfic #manga #tokyo ghoul #kaneki ken #headcannons #fluff #tokyo ghoul re #xoti writes

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kttyn1or · 8 months

Text

monbisou's mlb fic rec!! mlb fics recced by monbisou(me)!!

okay let’s get crackin!!

There’s Something About Marinette by ThoughtWarfare

im telling you this fic is so funny and honestly kind of the reason i got pulled back into ml fandom after thinking i’d finally moved on with my life. ever since i read this, marinette x ladybug has been my otp.

Girls Talk Boys by LNC

the core four and adrienette being oh so charming. to be honest, i would recommend everything and anything by LNC, this just happens to be my most recent read.

golden (like daylight) by okayanna

in my mind everyone has already read this because it’s so perfect and classic and lovely. also, well written! adrien is so well characterized. what else can i say. ummm 10/10.

Who Kissed Dupain-Cheng by Ridiculosity

sometimes i think about the marichat dynamic in this fic. actually, who am i kidding. i think about it all the time. constantly. i’m obsessed with the marichat dynamic in this fic.

Friends by meeble

short and sweet and deadly. god i love adrienette.

final girl by picayunewrites

could i do a fic rec and not mention final girl? could any honest marichat lover stay silent in the face of the work that is final girl? i recommend this. i recommend it so so hard.

comfort food by Reiaji

marinette cooks for adrien. marinette teaches adrien how to cook. marinette loves adrien. she loves him.

Trying to Get Bi by breeelis

adrien is ladybugs celebrity crush. is he your celebrity crush chat noir?

bon voyage by gentlefist

set more recently in canon! adrien and marinette are dating! they are dating one another! “dang it!” says chat noir.

Mr Perfect Disguise by caprisuns(marimbles)

ladybug wearing a very big floppy hat. adrien agreste wearing slides. romance!

baker “enemies” comic by buggachat

okay, you’re on tumblr, you’re a ml fan. i’m sure you’ve read or at least heard about buggachats comic. i think my favorite thing about buggachat is their portrayal of the core four. or maybe it’s their adrien? maybe it’s their ladynoir. i love buggachat so much.

oeuf ouch owie by miraculousumflower (ominousunflower)

hahahahahahahahahaha:):))

daydream by a_miiraculer and clairelutra

marinette and adrien are so so into eachother. also, he’s figuring out who ladybug is.

But All I’m Seeing Is You by chealseababylove

for a while i was like, “idk man i’m not sure i’m a ladrien type of guy” but that was before i read but all i’m seeing is you by chelseababylove.

The Dating App by leadernovaandthemacabre

chat noir and marinette. marinette and chat noir. they text eachother and analyze eachother from different angles. ps! a lot of sexy talk! for those who are opposed!

for the record by peachcitt

adrien and marinette set the dating record straight! as friends!!!! prpr

telepathy by thelibraryloser

sometimes you just want a good reveal fic. this one is really good.

A Partir De

something i’ve noticed in ladrien fics so far? a lot of very silly disguises. i’m talking extremely silly.

Strangers in the Bright Lights by poodles

poodles you cook my metaphorical noodles. also, this fic is wondrous.

and that’s it!! for now!!! more coming soon i suspect but then again, who knows?

#wow this turned out very long #anyway #realizing that maybe this is a little marichat heavy?#and ladrien?#not a lot of ladynoir #jeez monbisou #cmon man #fic rec #fanfiction reccomendations #miraculous ladybug #marinette dupain cheng #adrien agreste #adrienette #ladrien #marichat #ladynoir #<3

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autisticlancemcclain · 2 years

Text

“There is no way. You’re fucking with me right now.”

Shiro glares at her, arms crossed and bottom lip jutted out petulantly, because he’s 25 going on 3, apparently. “I am not. I am completely justified in it — ghosts are real. They are.”

Pidge throws her hands up, quickly scrambling on top of the couch cushions so she can look Shiro in the eye. She looks ready to kill. So does Shiro.

Lance is delighted.

”You are a man of science, Shirogane! You are a decorated astronaut! You have written papers —”

“Pidge fucking Holt our number one enemy is a zombie —”

“In what fucking way does a zombie prove the existence of ghosts —”

“In what way does it not —”

Keith slinks quietly into the room, sprawling half on top of Lance and turning his eyes to the arguing knuckleheads at the front of the room, because he has gotten way too comfortable in their time in space and thinks crushing Lance is funny.

“What are they arguing about?” he whispers.

Lance scowls, trying to push Keith off of him, but unfortunately Lance’s arms are kind of noodle-y and Keith is a stubborn jerk. (Lance can’t see him, due to the smothering, but he just knows Keith is smirking, like the butthead jerk he is.)

“I can’t tell you because your gigantic butt suffocating me,” Lance gripes.

“Spend a lot of time looking at my gigantic butt, do you?” Keith says blithely, and Lance flushes even though he knows Keith is teasing.

“Whatever, stupid-head.”

“Oh, ouch, McClain. Stupid-head? My inner four-year-old is smarting.”

“…I’m not telling you now. You don’t deserve to know.”

“Oh, I’m sure I’ll find out —”

“Someone back me up! Keith!”

Keith startles at Pidge’s snap, which gives Lance just enough leeway to squirm out from under Keith and also kick him for good measure. Keith winces, because Lance is pointy, but otherwise continues to look handsomely smug, which is very annoying.

“Uh, what?”

Pidge glares at Shiro one last time because she is a youngest child and therefore incapable of letting other people have the last word (Lance knows, he does the same) before turning exasperatedly to her fellow arm of Voltron. (Shiro rolls his eyes at her like the drama queen he is. Lance loves this shit. He didn’t know what a dork Shiro was until he met him, and it is the greatest thing he has discovered, including Voltron. Sorry, Alfor.)

“Tell Shiro that he’s a dumbass and ghosts are not real in any way, shape, or form, because he won’t listen to me!”

Keith blinks. Then his eyes narrow, smile going sharp and cocky — his game face. Lance looks away quickly so he doesn’t explode.

Stupid sexy motherfucker. With his stupid sexy hair and face and smile and — whatever. He’s hot, is the point, and Lance hates it.

“As much as I love disagreeing with Shiro —”

“HEY —”

“— I’m on his side this time, dude. Ghosts are real as shit. I’ve heard ‘em.”

To say Pidge is incensed is an understatement. Lance grins, flipping over on the couch to hang upside down because he thinks it will bring the most comedy to the situation when he is invariably asked for input.

“So you’re both blatant ignorers of science, then!”

“Um, no way, pint-sized Dana Scully. The evidence is everywhere.”

Pidge hisses. Like, actually. As if she is a particularly angry kitten, or perhaps one of those little chihuahuas with rage issues.

God, Lance’s life is so good.

“Call me pint-sized again, Kogane, and I’ll deliver a pint-sized kick so far up your ass you’ll —”

Lance tunes them out for the time being, letting them continue to vaguely insult each other and not actually go anywhere in their argument. He instead busies himself with finding tiny little washers under the couch (left there from the time Pidge, extremely sleep deprived at one in the morning, mistook the common room for her workshop while carrying a box of loose parts and tripped over the couch, spilling parts everywhere) and throwing them at Hunk. The man ignores the first couple dozen hits — and they are hits, because Lance doesn’t miss — but after washer #46, he visibly snaps, setting his tools down in a very carful way that tells Lance that Hunk wants to kill him a little.

“Lance, I’m fucking busy.”

“Oooooh, are they any good?”

It takes a moment for Lance’s horrible joke to sink in. Hunk closes his eyes and sighs deeply, but the corner of his mouth is twitching and Lance smirks to himself.

Hehe. Point to Lance.

“What is so important that you must interrupt my very important —” he puts heavy emphasis on the words and stares at Lance pointedly, but Lance has lots of practice pretending to not understand things to piss people off, so it does nothing — “work by repeatedly assaulting me with I-don’t-know-what?”

“Washers that Pidge dropped,” Lance supplies, and then points at the three stooges. “They’re arguing about ghosts. Team Ghosts Aren’t Real is losing. Thought you might want to weigh in.”

Hunk looks incredulous. Lance doesn’t even pretend to hide his grin. “How is the correct team losing?”

Lance shrugs. “Dunno. Guess Pidge needs your arguing expertise and your patented look of disdain. You should join her.”

Look, Lance has never claimed to be subtle.

“Damn right,” Hunk says, determined, and Lance grins.

He loves having his own personal sitcom.

“Now what are you fools arguing about?”

The speed at which everyone’s head whips toward Hunk is comical. What is also comical is all three dorks make an identical face of relief, each one individually thinking that, of course, good ol’ Hunk is on their side.

God, this is literally getting better by the second.

“Hunk,” Shiro says, weariness leaving his face by the second.

Oh, Lance cannot wait to see it come back full force.

“Pidge seems to fully believe that ghosts aren’t real, even though that’s a ridiculous stance to take given our current circumstances.”

Hunk scoffs. All the blood is starting to rush to Lance’s head to the point where it’s hard to pay full attention, now, so he scrambles back upright and leans as close as he can. He will not miss even a second of this.

“Of course ghosts aren’t real.”

Silence. A pin could drop on the rug-covered floors and sound like a nuke going off.

They erupt at once.

“Hunk, how could you?” Shiro sounds heartbroken. He looks it, too, deep black eyes all big and sad like a hurt puppy’s.

“Hunk, you fucking traitor.” Keith is all hot and glare-y, but his stance is loose, playful.

God, Lance is so attracted to that man. It’s fucking ridiculous.

“That’s my man!” Pidge’s yell is louder than anyone’s, and she holds her hand up for a high-five. Hunk slaps it without looking, and the sound cracks through the room.

“Unrehearsed,” they say in unison, like the dorky nerds they are. There’s a second of unbelievably tense (and still a little betrayed, if Shiro’s expression is any indication — Keith has been absentmindedly patting him on the shoulder for the past few minutes) silence before everyone speaks at once.

“We fly magical robot lions —”

“Magic does not equate ghosts —”

“Yes it fucking does —”

“That’s so fucking stupid, just because one thing exists doesn’t mean another thing exists. If humans evolved the ability to breathe underwater it would not give them the sudden ability to fly —”

“In what way is that argument even remotely the same —”

“In every way, what are you even —”

Their argument is getting circular, so Lance starts to get bored. And snacky. Hm. He’s pretty sure Hunk is hiding that Beruvian wild rice grain in the top-most counter in the kitchen (the one only he can reach), and that shit pops deliciously, almost as good as movie theatre popcorn. And Lance is good at climbing shit, and also at stealing from Hunk.

He quietly makes his way out of the common room, taking his time as he walks to the kitchen. He won’t be missing any vital parts of the argument, he can feel it. He can afford to stroll. Mm, and think of all the salt and butter he’s going to put on the popped rice. Hell, maybe he’ll grab that weird spicy Altean soda that only he and Allura like, too.

Seriously. Murderous alien Nazis and crushing homesickness aside, Lance is living the goddamned life.

Allura and Coran are both in the kitchen when Lance walks in, and greet him brightly. Lance grins back and waves, but continues making a beeline for the counter farthest to the left and hefting himself up.

“What are you up to, dear?” Coran asks, sounding amused. Lance turns to wink at him.

“Shenanigans,” he says evasively.

Allura hums. “And would those shenanigans involve the destruction of my castle?” she asks, as Lance starts opening cupboard doors to use them as footholds.

“See, that’s the best part about being a stick, ‘Lura. I’m basically as heavy as a sad little puff of wind in the middle of the Arizona desert.”

“Neither of us have any frame of reference for that,” Allura points out.

Lance waves a dismissive hand. “Eh. I’m not going to break stuff, is the point.” He steps gingerly on the door of a particularly small cabinet, and pretends he doesn’t notice Coran blatantly standing under him with a hand out to spot him because he thinks Lance will fall and die.

How rude. Have they no faith in him? Lance is the youngest sibling of five. He is excellent at getting into shit he’s not supposed to be in. It’s, like, his superpower.

“Aha!” He finally sees it — a rough pink bag, pulled taut with the sweet sweet elixir of snacky promises. Hunk has made a valiant effort to hide it behind a couple pots.

He should know better, really. Lance has been stealing his shit since they were toddlers.

Lance carefully makes his way back to the ground — sticking his tongue out at Coran when he manages without dying, who raises and eyebrow and flicks Lance on the nose in retaliation — holding the bag triumphantly. He immediately starts rummaging around for a pan, some butter, and some salt.

“What’s the occasion?” Allura asks, poking at the bag.

“Drama in the common room.”

“Ooooh.” Allura perks up immediately, heaving herself up to sit on the counter to watch Lance as he works. Coran heads over to the fridge to grab himself a water and the two of them their fancy sodas, which he gives to them with a teasing grimace and a paternal hair ruffle (something they both pretend to hate but secretly feel all smushy about).

“What kind of drama?”

“They’re arguing about whether or not ghosts are real.”

“…Ghosts?” Coran says the word carefully, like he does when something doesn’t translate. Allura looks confused, too. Lance hurriedly wracks his brain for an Altean equivalent. He can’t think of one, so he goes with a description.

“Spiorad beoite,” he says after a moment of thinking. Animated spirit.

He’s proven correct when, at the same time, Coran lights up and Allura goes scowly. “Taibhse,” they both say, in exact opposite tones.

The first rice grain pops.

Lance grins.

“I think you guys should come back to the common room with me,” he says, after his rice is popped and seasoned and Allura and Coran have started a small argument of their own.

They do decide to come with him.

The three of them make their way down the hallways, Coran needling Lance for information the whole time.

“Who is arguing what?” he asks.

“Pidge and Shiro started it — team ghost and anti-ghost respectively. Hunk is on Pidge’s side, and Keith,” Lance, admittedly, smiles when he says the name, “is shockingly teaming up with Shiro.”

Lance sees the smirk spread over Allura’s face and realises a second too late what she’s going to say, and as such is not fast enough to run away before she slings an arm around his shoulder and holds him captive with her superstrength.

“I bet I can guess which team you’re on, Loverboy,” she teases. Lance glares at her, but it does very little because unfortunately his face is very red.

“Get off of me, you —” Lance tries very hard to think of an appropriate name to call her. Preferably something scathing and witty. “—jerky jerk face.”

God, he wishes the universe would smite him where he is standing. Why can he only think of good plans and insults when he is in mortal peril? What a fucking design flaw. Lance should take it up with a manager.

Allura bursts out laughing and gives him a noogie, because she is horrible and spends way too much time with Shiro and Shiro is a horrible, horrible influence.

“Oh, but Lance! I want to hear about Keith’s luscious hair! Or his dazzling smile! Or —“ she batts her eyelashes — “his sexy, sexy voice —”

Since Lance has about as much physical power over Allura as a butterfly does a mountain, he decides his best course of action is to screech at the top of his lungs and go limp. It works like a charm.

Lance decides to celebrate his newfound freedom by crossing his eyes and sticking his tongue out at Allura, which in hindsight was possibly a poor plan.

“Oh, it’s on, you little runt —”

This time Lance’s screech is one of fear. The last time he’d seen that expression on someone — one of bruised honour — was the time he’d been caught using Veronica’s very expensive custom lip gloss in a ‘potion’. He’d barely escaped with his life.

Lance barely dodges Allura’s sharp jab to the ribs, and is ready to start sprinting away from her and her pointy fingers before a calloused hand grips the back of his hoodie and lifts him limply in the air.

“Children,” Coran says drily, holding them away from each other (and also somehow holding on to the popped rice and drinks?) and up in the air like particularly naughty kittens. “Save the bloodshed for common room. Don’t waste it here.”

“But she falsely accused me of being on Keith’s team for gay reasons! Who says I’m even on Keith’s team?”

“Because it’s true, you whipped loser —”

Coran shakes them both, and they shut up. “Are you going to behave for the two minutes it will take us to meet the others?” he asks. His eyes twinkle mischievously.

“Yes, Coran,” they chorus, and are finally freed.

They make it the rest of the way to the common room without incident, except for the four (4) occasions wherein Allura looked suspiciously like she wanted to Say Something, because she is horrible and has no respect for Lance’s already tattered dignity.

“All of you are ridiculous! The existence of the Blue Lion on Earth does not imply the reanimation of the human spirit!”

“Of course it doesn’t,” Allura agrees as she strolls elegantly in the room. She nods at Pidge. “That would be ridiculous.”

Hunk looks close to tears in relief. “Finally, someone with sense!” he cries.

“Now, now, lad,” Coran says, shaking his head. “While indeed, our wonderful Blue Lion does not prove the existence of ghosts, it is not for your reasoning — ghosts simply outdate Blue. There are hundreds of other proofs of the spirits of the universe.”

Keith holds out a fist for Coran to bump, looking smug. Coran shakes it — because Lance may, admittedly, amuse himself by wrongly teaching Coran Earth culture —but Keith looks unbothered. “Take that, Hunk. We have a wise Altean advisor on our side, which means we basically win by default.”

“We have a fucking princess!”

Lance grins as he tosses some popped rice into his mouth. Now that Allura has turned her evil older sister teasing and arguments on someone that isn’t Lance, he can enjoy himself again.

And enjoy himself he does. When he notices that Shiro has his crazy-eyes again, Slav-style, he decides to hand him a couch pillow. Shiro, so caught up in his surety that he is Obviously Correct, barely even registers where the pillow comes from and immediately lobs it at Hunk’s face.

There’s silence. A shocked, incredulous silence. Then Keith’s face lights up with unbridled glee — and holy shit, he has the most beautiful smile of anyone Lance has ever met and ever will meet — and he grabs his own pillow and smacks Pidge with it. The room ascends into wonderful, wonderful chaos.

Lance hurriedly sets his bowl and soda somewhere else and busies himself with handing ammo out to any empty hand — Coran in particular is going absolutely ham — shouting encouragement whenever someone lands a hit (regardless of the side), and —admittedly — simping a little over Keith’s rippling muscles.

(Look, he’s wearing that black sleeveless hoodie, okay? The one that fits his chest real well and shows off his biceps. And, well.

Lance has eyes.)

“Ugh,” Hunk finally mumbles, half-smushed under a pile of pillowed-out paladins and co. “Who won?”

Shiro and Pidge — who started it all — answer at the same time.

“We did.”

There’s a loud, in-unison groan from the pile.

Lance giggles. “Dorks,” he says.

At the sound of his voice, Keith shoots up so quickly that Shiro is thrown off him with a yelp.

“Lance!” He shouts it. Lance startles, staring back with wide eyes — dark brown meeting dusky purple. “Lance, you’re the answer!”

Alright, look. Look.

Lance is a human guy, okay? He’s just a guy. He’s challenge any other being in the giant fucking universe to look the love in their life in the eyes as they called them the answer and not, like, collapse. Lance is surprised his heart is still beating, Christ above.

“I am?” he squeaks.

“Of course you are!” Keith says it so earnestly. As if it’s obvious.

Lance’s heart honest-to-God skips a fucking beat.

“Our vote’s divided, shatz.” The closest Earth language to the Galran Keith’s speaking is German, and Lance’s German is rusty at best, so he has no clue what Keith’s saying. The word could be different, anyway. Lance tries desperately to convince himself it doesn’t matter.

“You could solve everything!” Keith continues.

Oh, dear God. Is he doing this on purpose? Lance is gonna fuckin’ die.

“That’s not a bad idea,” Pidge says from her position on top of Allura. “Tie-breaker, to say it in a less gay way.”

Allura snorts.

“Shut up, Pidge,” Lance and Keith snap at the same time. They look at each other, and then away quickly.

Keith’s face is as red as Lance’s.

Jesus fucking shitdicks, this will be how Lance dies.

“C’mon, Lance,” Hunk complains. “I want to be off this pile. Choose! Are ghosts real or not?”

Keith is looking at him so hopefully. It’s so cute. Pidge rolls her eyes, like she already knows what the answer is going to be.

And, well. Lance hates proving Pidge right, but he’s doomed! He’s doomed, when Keith is looking at him like that.

“Ghosts are very definitely real,” he rushes out.

Keith smiles so hard his eyes crinkle shut. Lance’s very favourite Keith expression. “I knew I could count on you, liebe.”

Vaguely, Lance hears Shiro’s muttered ‘oh my God’ and Coran’s blatant laughter, but all he can really hear is the blood rushing through his ears because holy shit.

“This proves nothing,” Hunk whines as everyone lethargically makes their way off the floor and to the popped rice. “Lance would be on our side if he wasn’t so disgustingly in love with —”

“OKAY THANK YOU HUNK,” Lance says loudly, and his entire horrible team snickers at him.

Except for Keith. Keith is looking at him almost… shyly.

“I have to be somewhere that’s not here,” Lance announces transparently because he’s a little too frazzled for excuses.

“Loser,” Pidge heckles, because she’s particularly horrible.

“Goodbye,” Lance says again. As he’s about to finally walk out the door, there’s a soft call of his name that stops him in his tracks. Lance swallows roughly.

“Yeah, Keith?”

Keith looks hesitant again, for a second. Then his eyes narrow, and his smile gets sharp and cocky.

His game face.

“I’m glad you’ve got my back, Sharpshooter,” he says. And then he winks.

Lance can’t even help himself. He practically flees out of the room. He doesn’t allow himself to stop until he’s collapsed in his bed face-first, and has a good, lengthy scream into his pillow.

Once he’s calmed down and his heart no longer feels like it’s been injected with pure cocaine, he sits up, props up three of his favourite stuffed animals, and looks at them intently.

“I think Keith was flirting with me,” he tells them seriously. Mr. Shark says nothing, but Lance can feel a giddy smile spread over his face anyway. “I think — I think he likes me.” He can no sooner stop the giggle bubbling up his throat than fly to the moon.

“I think Keith Kogane likes me!” He holds a pillow to his chest and flops back onto his quilt. He sighs to himself, kicking his legs out a bit. Yeah, he suffered quite a bit of teasing from the whole ordeal, but — but. He thinks he was right, earlier.

He really is living the life.

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munson-blurbs · 1 year

Note

TUI 15

BUG. MORNING SEXY TIME. A BROKEN CONDOM. BREEDINGKINK!EDDIE.

“God, I love you.” HE SAID IT!!!!

“Because it wasn’t about sex when you calmed me down after the parent-teacher conference. It wasn’t about sex when you taught Harris how to read and bowl and be a better person than I’ll ever be. It wasn’t about sex when you cheered me on during our last gig, and it wasn’t about sex when I saw you holding Ettie.” (He mentioned her with Ettie!😩) “And even after having sex, it isn’t about sex. It’s about you being the one for me. I love you, I love you, I love you.” *Screams like a fucking banshee*

Inviting her with him and Harris for the weekend 💕

Lil man Harris excited to see his ms. sweetheart pick him up from school 🥰

he leans in to Jeff, whispering “I told her,” ending the statement with a grin. “My man!” Jeff grabs Eddie’s shoulder and gives it a small shake. “Let me know when to buy my tux for the wedding.” WE LOVE JEFF, YOUR HONOR.

Jason is a limp noodle ass bitch 🤣

BABY HARRIS AS FRANK!?!? UGH MY HEART

The fact that there are actually people like Jason who still bully people and think it’s actually funny is just so… sad 😂

“Are you sure you’re okay with this?” “Positive.”

My soul can’t handle this chapter…. Or the fact that there’s angst ahead 😩 WHY BUG!! WHY!?! *knowing damn well I will love it* Love you and this lil almost family. 🥹💗

*me knowing I can’t handle the angst about to come my way

B, you know I gotta sneak in a little breeding kink Eddie wherever I go.

This "I love you" has been 15 chapters in the making...it had to be cute and meaningful. My goal was feet-kicking, squealing fluff, so I'm glad that this was achieved 🥰

Jeff is no Mac Daddy Wayne, but he definitely gets an honorable mention.

Jason is a limp noodle ass bitch (both canonically and in TUI) and we do not have time for his bullshit. I should've written Eddie punching him, tbh.

Harris is the cutest lil Frank Sinatra, and I actually teared up a bit writing that part, but that could also be because my grandma was a fan of Frank Sinatra as well.

YOU CAN HANDLE THIS ANGST, B! IF YOU CAN GET THROUGH CHAPTER 4, YOU CAN GET THROUGH ANYTHING!

#answered

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one-vivid-judgment · 6 months

Note

waiter! waiter! more Kuwana headcanons please!!

no just kidding but can we please get some nsfw or sfw headcanons for my favorite depressed old handyman? I'd let him get handy with me if you know what I mean...

God, I miss Kuwana so much, I wanna replay Lost Judgment SO badly 😭😭 Crazy thing is, I've only played it ONCE when I've played 7 + Judgment for HOURS (and probably will pick up 0, Kiwami 2 & 5 for a replay at some point; sorry for Mine, Tanimura and Kido cause I ADORE them, but I'm NOT going thru block hell + prison break hell + Fuckin' Munakata AGAIN).

Idc Idc Idc, I just know Kuwana would treat me right 😔😔

He loves sleeping in as much as the next guy, and he’ll do it as much as he can get away with. However, if you are staying over (or rather, he stays over at your place, cause his is... like that), he’ll sacrifice his sweet, sweet sleep and wake up earlier than usual just to make you some coffee. He hasn’t quite let go of his daily morning coffee routine from his teacher days, so he has the experience and makes a mean cup of coffee.

Absolute husband material: caring, sweet, affectionate, absolutely adores you. This just in though: you must have guessed it by the state of his apartment, but cleaning is... not his forte to say the least. Cooking, he’s a bit better at, but he is still average at best—honestly, he might still be living off cup noodles and convenience store food, and living in that small, filthy one-room apartment if it weren’t for you.

Picked up reading as a hobby in his university days and it persisted well into his teacher days. When he got fired though, he had to quit buying books. In fact, he had to sell some to make ends meet. Admittedly, you’ve caught him staring at the books in your shelves more than once—please, please, please, let him read them, he will love you for it. It kinda makes him miss teaching, in a way, but it’s nice anyway.

As you may have noticed, his teacher roots are far from gone. Which extends to sex. Which means teacher-student roleplay. He’s fine doing it with no other add-ons, but if you go out of your way to add a sexy schoolgirl uniform to the mix—you might kill the man, honestly. Also, if you want to feel sore for a few days? Call him ‘Kuwana-sensei’.

Sex with him is more love-making than anything. Romantic, slow and passionate. Cuddle-fucking is his favorite position for a reason: he gets to have you pressed impossibly close to him, kiss you whenever he wants to, maybe grab a handful of ass or tits if he’s feeling like it (never ask him if he’s an ass or a tits guy though, he won’t be able to give you an answer).

Handymen need to know how to use their hands, and boy, does he know how to use his. There is nothing he likes more than seeing you fall apart on his fingers. If one day he doesn’t feel like having sex but you do, he’s not leaving you out to dry; he’s making you come on his fingers at least once, maybe twice if you can handle more.

#ryu ga gotoku #judge eyes #judgment #lost judgment #jin kuwana #.txt #anon ask #yakuza headcanons #nsft headcanon

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sequencefairy · 1 year

Note

Hello Jess it's time for fun fic authors self rec! Kindly tell us your favorite five fics you've written, then pass this on to spread the self-love ❤️

Oh! Thank you beloved.

♦ 'Cause This is Devotion - Ten/Rose, Bad Wolf!Rose, 4.6k, M

“You do not get to die on me now, you daft alien, not after I’ve been through so goddamn much to get back to you.” Rose sits up to pound her fist into his chest. “Fucking breathe, damn you,” she swears, and when no one says anything to stop her, she pounds the Doctor’s chest again. She wonders if she can break his ribs the way she could break a man’s. There’s no one left to ask now, not with him so still, so silent; splayed across the asphalt like a puppet with his strings cut. His face is slack, eyes closed and mouth parted. OR: The Doctor dies in the road, and Rose Tyler tells the universe no.

One night, @zjofierose and I were spelunking through our WIP folders and I found the skeleton of this and it sparked something inside of me and I immediately desired to finish it. I love Bad Wolf!Rose, I love creating actions that have far-reaching consequences we do not explore on the page, I love writing Doctor/Rose angst.

♦ Rush Light - Jaskier/Yennefer, canon-adjacent, post-s2, 22k, E

He’d been headed back from the taverns down by the wharf, having done a tour of the establishments to see if one would take him on for the weekend, when he’d seen it: a flash of purple in the light of a street lamp, swiftly followed by several large men in dark clothes. Something had turned over in the bottom of his stomach at the sight. Even if it wasn’t who he thought it might be, this wasn’t a neighbourhood for someone with the kind of coin to afford a cloak that colour to be wandering around in. So, against his mostly better judgement, Jaskier had let himself turn down the selfsame alley, steps slowing so as not to arrive as a too hasty surprise. He creeps forward, glad of the rushing rain as it muffles his footsteps. Some people also forget that he is quite capable of being quiet when needs must. Very good that he did go to this trouble after all; he hears her before he gets close enough to see them. “Get the fuck off me!” she snarls, and oh, Jaskier would know that voice anywhere. In which a sorceress gets herself into a spot of bother, and Jaskier happens to be in the area. It's all rather more serious than he expects.

I finished s2 of The Witcher and immediately descended into my google drive with forty ideas and this was the one that floated to the top. I love this fic. I had so much fun writing it. It gave me back my fantasy voice, it reminded me that I can write things that are fully for my own self and that other people will also enjoy them, and it was fun as hell to do a bunch of silly research for this.

♦ Signal Fire - Prodigal Son gen!fic, Malcolm Bright-centric, post-series finale, 2.8k, M

Dani’s footsteps crunch over brittle and drying grass as she approaches. Her weapon is still up. Sunlight glints off the barrel. “Bright?” she asks. Malcolm doesn't look down.

I got into Prodigal Son before realising that it didn't have an ending and when I got through to the end of what we got, I was left with so many questions. None of them are answered in this fic, but I did reaffirm the love I have for whumping the pretty boy.

♦ For Your Eyes Only - Shyan, 007 AU, 6.2k, E

The door to the elevator opens and Shane's stomach sinks. He’d know the breadth of those shoulders anywhere. “Moneypenny!” Ryan crows, as he sweeps towards Shane’s desk. Shane thinks wistfully of the long rice noodles and sweet-spicy sauce he has been dreaming about all week. Mr Daeng’s Tom Yum would also have been such a nice addition to Shane’s fridge for the weekend. “Don’t call me that,” Shane says, and regrets it immediately. OR: It's Bergara. Ryan Bergara, and he'll have his martini shaken, not stirred. Shane, on the other hand, manages M's calendar with an iron fist and has no time for nonsense. Or does he?

This fic is so sexy, if I do say so myself. It's got spies, it's got a little violence, it's got the author's kink discovery in the middle of it. What's not to love?

This Tornado Loves You - Shyan, Storm Chasers AU, 22k, E

“Thing’s a fuckin’ monster,” TJ says into the phone, “you should be able to see it now.” Shane turns to look out the truck window. The sky is black, and around him, the corn tops are still. Nothing moves. The air feels terrifyingly full. Shane looks under the storm. It takes him a moment, but then he sees it, backlit by a flash of lightning. All the hair stands up on the back of Shane’s neck. Or: Shane Madej is a serious scientist, not just some yahoo with a camera and a death wish. Ryan, on the other hand, has a camera and a plan.

When they said write what you know, I took them at their word and wrote 22k about storms and chasing them and filled it full of weather and romance and the kind of proposal I might even say yes to, if it ever happened to me in the future.

#jess answers #thechaoscryptid #am writing #anyway these are just five of my favourites #i have way more than five

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naneun-no · 1 year

Text

💭 Thoughts on Seven - song and MV

Are you looking for someone to react to this with you? Are you wanting to hear someone else’s thoughts so you can organize your own? Here you go! This is gonna be a long one but I have thoughts to share! I’ve broken them down into categories…

The Song

Lo and behold, the horny anons were (a little bit) right! This song is definitely about sex! Lol.

I’m gonna need a few more listens to really solidify my opinion, but first few listen throughs and… I like it! It’s fast, its a little chaotic, but it’s still so melodic and pleasing to listen to, courtesy of Jung Kook’s impeccable vocals, as usual. It’s a lot more explicit than I was expecting, lmao, but we’ve been saying for a while that he’s a grown ass man. No serious person was out here thinking he doesn’t fuck. Is the song somewhat aspirational for him with the “every minute every hour” thing, considering he spends at least 2 hours at a time in the middle of the night making noodles with ARMY? Perhaps. But hey, most of us alosexuals can only dream of getting lucky seven days a week, so I don’t blame him for manifesting that energy. Also, he didn’t write it. So there’s that.

Concept & Video

My condolences to the horny anons for the lack of steamy, sexy scenes in the video (the scenes that the rest of us knew wouldn’t be there, and let’s be real Jung Kook singing about fucking somebody right is already probably the most his fans can take at any one time lmao. I’m sure there were ladies fainting at his GMA performance like they were front row watching Elvis swivel his hips in 1956).

I liked the video! It was fun, and unexpectedly funny; JK playing the part of a boyfriend so obsessed with his toxic relationship that he keeps chasing his poor woman down even after every breakup (and murder?) attempt, through these surreal settings that just show how chaotic and unstable their relationship is. Han So Hee was gorgeous and did a good job despite her character pretty much having the same reaction/feeling in every scene but the last. Jung Kook, as so many pointed out, did a pretty terrible job looking angry or frustrated at any point 🤣 but that wasn’t really the point — the point is his obsession with his partner and willingness to jump off of a literal gurney and right back into the same situation that put him there in the first place.

Which brings me to my one gripe about the concept of the video which is that…. It doesn’t really match the lyrics? It’s not like that’s unusual in the world of MVs and I don’t think videos always have to be a play by play of the song, but it does feel like an excellent execution of a concept that would have fit better with a song about obsessive love, being unable to stop falling into the same toxic patterns, etc. Instead the song is pretty purely about sex and romance. To be honest, a few scenes of them falling into bed together would probably have made a bit more sense, honestly, if that’s supposed to be the reason he can’t stay away from this woman who seems to want almost nothing to do with him, lol.

Overall the video was visually satisfying and interesting, and this moment actually made me laugh out loud, boy was in his goofy element for a moment:

Latto

I’ll start by saying I was very excited when I realized that she would be featuring. I know some people had complaints, others didn’t know who she was, but I very much do know who she is and love her sound, so I was jazzed. My one concern was that… Latto lovers don’t be mad, but in my opinion she doesn’t have a lot of on-screen charisma.

I think it’s because she’s still relatively new. She’s beautiful, but I’m not sure she knows what to do with it yet other than sensually touch herself and minutely dance. It’s reminiscent of Dua Lipa in the early days when she wasn’t really great at dancing but was thrust up in the spotlight surrounded by backup dancers (who lest we forget have typically been training in dance nearly all their lives). For Latto, if she has no interest in dancing, that’s totally fine. I don’t think she HAS to do it or be good at it, but then in that case, I would expect a bit more expressiveness in her face and actions. And maybe you totally disagree with me — feel free to watch the Big Energy video and decide for yourself. To me though, she doesn’t bring enough energy (lol). Basically the opposite of Jung Kook in the GMA performance (which he fucking owned 😩 the 90s boy band vibes, the way he held his own and actually drew my attention the entire time despite the immense talent of his backup dancers. Holy shit that boy is a star.)

And my initial excitement and concern about Latto pretty much held up. Her rap was good, a fun add to the song, and I think she nailed the energy and the rhythm and the vibe (seriously when will male rappers catch up? Women are the only ones I want featuring on pop songs from now on. They’re the only ones who understand how to stay on topic). That being said her feature in the video was… just okay? The funeral scene was one of the better ones because of the above moment I mentioned, so that saved it, but I wish she’d given a little more than just like…touches to her boobs, you know? But to be fair, that was in keeping with the song’s theme.

Overall it’s a job well done for her. I was bummed she couldn’t join him at GMA but baby rapper JK came out of hiding and did a few of her lines, which was fun. He did quite intentionally change out the pronoun from “him” to “her” which brings me to…

Does this song mean he’s announcing he’s straight?!

I feel like I’m going to get a lot of anons about this… or maybe not since their wild predictions of pornographic make out scenes didn’t happen, after all… but I feel like there will be a lot of people calling this his definitive “coming out” as a pussy-loving straight dude. And to that I say…

Maybe? Here are my thoughts on this in no particular order:

We always say to listen to the guys. I didn’t disregard it when he and Jimin chose not to change the pronouns in their cover of “We Don’t Talk Anymore” and I won’t disregard the fact that he did change them in his performance here. For whatever reason, he wanted this song and this performance to be about a woman.

This might be an unpopular opinion, but him making this single about a woman doesn’t necessarily mean he did it out of an obligatory need to appear straight in order to appease his oppressive government. Maybe he just wanted to make it about a woman. And just in case you forgot…

Liking, being interested in, and/or being sexually attracted to women doesn’t automatically make a man heterosexual. Jimin has been giving off flirty vibes to men AND women his entire career, and he still melts over Jung Kook like a bomb pop on the Fourth of July. You can be a man and like women and also like men and those things can coexist and there’s a word for that. It’s called being bisexual. Hi 👋 there’s lots of us out here, even though we tend to get drowned out and ignored, especially if and when we pursue relationships with the opposite sex. Let’s not do that so much anymore, yeah?

I’ve brought it up before and I’ll continue to; he was in Charlie Puth’s video as a very obvious love interest. Now he has a woman in his video as a love interest. Neither one cancels out the other. Neither one is a definitive confirmation of his sexuality.

Also like… maybe it is that he’s just closeted and doesn’t feel ready to share his sexuality and so he’s going with heteronormativity because it’s easy and less questions will be asked. Idk. It’s not really my business to know.

Regardless, all the holding-hands-with-an-actress-in-a-music video moments in the world can’t cancel out this:

He supported Jimin in all these ways with all this undeniable lovey-dovey energy all this time. I don’t think his feelings for that man have changed one iota, whether it’s a really tight friendship (with… ahem, undertones of longing and desire) or a bona fide relationship. Either way, I think they’re enjoying it. And I hope they have fun exploring New York together.

Oh and I know he didn’t write it but… you gotta appreciate the continuity of “give me a good ride” and “it’s the way that you can ride” 🤭🤭🤭🤭

OKAY I think that’s all my thoughts for now. What are YOUR thoughts??? Please share them. Please share them respectfully, whether you comment or message or send an ask. I’m all ears 😁

#jeon jungkook #jungkook seven #jungkook seven music video #thoughts on seven by jungkook

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gertruderobinsonscat · 2 years

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I posted 1,581 times in 2022

86 posts created (5%)

1,495 posts reblogged (95%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@dathen

@ashes-in-a-jar

@feathered-serpents

@cuttoothed

@neeka-noodle

I tagged 1,086 of my posts in 2022

Only 31% of my posts had no tags

#our flag means death - 165 posts

#the sandman - 113 posts

#malevolent podcast - 108 posts

#dracula daily - 85 posts

#interview with the vampire - 56 posts

#v sexy and good op - 42 posts

#ofmd spoilers - 41 posts

#marvel - 39 posts

#iwtv spoilers - 36 posts

#moon knight - 35 posts

Longest Tag: 135 characters

#and you don’t need to relentlessly seek out reasons it’s problematic and spread the word that this is actually the worst thing to exist

My Top Posts in 2022:

924 notes - Posted August 1, 2022

Sorry if this has already been done.

1,001 notes - Posted March 12, 2022

“Some people freak out about the age difference…they think, ‘What’s this 70 year old man doing with a guy seven times his age?’ You know, I don’t care!”

2,880 notes - Posted November 7, 2022

You know, I think Lucius might be the most badass character in the entire series so far? I mean:

1. Jim is about to stab him in the face, so he distracts them long enough to whack them on head and escape

2. Convinces Jim to stop trying to kill him by stealing a dagger from a vicious pirate who keeps a jar of severed noses

3. Izzy Hands *tries* to put the fear of god into him and he responds with ‘you want to fuck me so bad it makes you look stupid’ and outwits him by being nice to Fang and learning Izzy’s secrets

4. *Cuts off his own goddamned finger* in a delirious haze, winning the game of fuckery

5. Tells motherfucking Blackbeard to stop being a dick

2,925 notes - Posted March 21, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Shout out to Death of the Endless for being such an excellent wingman to her insufferably emo little brother.

“Hey let’s go to the tavern and hang out with some people! Oh ho, there’s one handsome mortal over there who maybe has enough joie de vivre he make at least a *dent* in your brooding drama king persona! Why don’t you go introduce yourself? I promise not to lay a finger on him until he’s ready!”

*seven hundred years later and Dream is more insufferable and emo than ever*

“Hey, why don’t you check in on that cute friend of yours? ;) He’d love to see you. ;)”

6,026 notes - Posted August 6, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #let it be known that my top tag would be tma related if i tagged my reblogged tma posts

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gayerthanevertbh · 2 years

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dearest johansson || s.j

pairings: scarlett johansson x fem!reader

summary: both of you were infamously toxic for each other. you hate her, she hates you too. maybe things got a little too out of hand.

warnings: slut shaming, degradation, talks about drugs (briefly), cheating (both sides), hatred, sexual theme (brief), sensitive topics (talks about suicide, drugs, and more). please read at your own risk.

a/n: this is heavily inspired by the movie malcolm & marie. although, i had a little twist. let me know if you want part two.

masterlist

There’s a difference between staying married and staying in love. The word marriage seemed to be like a job – a work that has to be done every day. You cook for your wife, you make love with your wife, and you give them the best reassurance if they need it. But, what if the idea of being married becomes shit to you? I feel that all the time ever since Scarlett has become this whole new persona bitch. She was meaner – sometimes sweeter – and can be very demanding. As she said in an interview once, she was a little controlling. I mostly agree with that.

Staying in love can be hard to admit because I, for a fact, wasn’t in love anymore. Well, maybe that’s just me angry talking; I probably don’t mean it. But as time passes, it could be true. It’s not because I envy Scarlett’s work. In fact, I praise her talent and her brilliant mind. But she can be a total prick sometimes. Maybe all the time.

Getting out of the car was relieving from all of her rants about this guy who seemed to be praising the role that she played in Marriage Story. She said that the man was oblivious, horrific, and completely dull when I thought of him as a swell man. For the most part, I wasn’t hearing her part. I guess I was too tired to think or speak.

“What do you want for dinner?” I asked, opening the door with the keys and maneuvering myself in; inhaling the homey scent. Scarlett hummed and flopped her entire body on the couch, rubbing her eyes roughly.

“Ramen? I don’t know,” she murmured, laying her head on the armrest. “Did you like the movie?”

I nodded, not knowing what she really asked, but I still nodded in courtesy. I can’t believe I’m still being nice to a narcissistic woman who requires attention. Why am I still in this relationship?

“Tell me verbally, come on.”

I could throw a whole blender at her if I could. But, I chose not to. That would be too brutal and could ruin my entire career for it, so I sighed but rather deeply and replied with a nonchalant tone, “I liked the movie, Scarlett.”

I could hear a fainted laugh and without even a blink of an eye, she was hugging me from behind – her head buried into my neck as she squeezed my waist, whispering with lust: “You are so fucking sexy, you turn me on so much.”

Now, I wasn’t as turned on as her but I like the way she squeezed me if I had to be honest. Though, I was still pretty upset with her for what happened to this fine evening. I turned my head over, trying to shake her off, and continued to unwrap the noodles from the plastic. Scarlett scrunched her eyebrows in confusion. It was as if I wasn’t appreciating her act in her new movie – it wasn’t about that, it was because I had no recognition for it. All the hard work she’s done, I was there. I picked up the pieces when she was frustrated and didn’t know what else to do. I had to put up with her yelling at me or someone, then take her back home whenever she was severely intoxicated.

Scarlett Johansson has been infuriating lately.

“What seems to be the problem?” Scarlett asked, chuckling it all off as her hands tried to touch my waist – but I flinched quickly. She scoffed but then smiled, “Baby, what’s wrong? Come here.”

I turned around, dropping the packets of noodles on the countertop – making a loud slam – and pursed my lips together way too tightly. I responded with a tone of authority, “Make your own god damn noodles how about that, hm?”

“First of all, calm down,” she demanded, with her hand lifted in the air. “Second of all, what’s going on? Did I do something wrong–”

I grabbed the bowl from the dishwashing sink and placed it on the counter, not afraid that it might break, and poured the noodles in it. She watched as my anger rose until it was clogging inside my throat, wanting to roar it out. I snapped my head to the side and said: “Figure that out yourself.”

“Y/N–”

I turned on the lamp that was at the center of the table and placed her warm bowl of noodles that was nearly fresh. Though, I can say that it was instant. Either way, it was unhealthy enough to eat. I pulled her to a chair that made a loud screeching sound and continued, but with a louder voice, “All you did this night was to fucking talk about your work and you never even gave me attention throughout it!”

Scarlett crossed her arms, trying to act like a victim, and responded with the same voice as I had – although a little meaner.

“Y/N, I had to. I had to thank everyone who made this film with me… of course, I’ll talk to them all night!”

“Don’t fucking pull that shit with me,” I cut her off with an evident scoff and removed my earrings that were gifted from her on our 1st anniversary. She sighed, pinching her nose bridge, and replied: “Can you come back here? You don’t just walk away from this.”

I lolled my head to the side, flopping my hands on the side of my thighs, and responded with a monotone voice, “If you can talk to your people and thank them all night, then I might as well not talk to you. I’m just being fair.”

I walked away like I was in a movie, although it wasn’t. This was reality, and it sucked. Scarlett sucked her lower lip in – as if to control her anger – then quickly blabbered the nastiest thing a person could say: “You are so fucking ungrateful! Everything I do isn’t enough, huh? You’re just some skank that I fuck all the time and–god, I even married you! You are fucking deranged, Y/N. DERANGED!”

These words don’t hurt me as much, they were always there. I wasn’t innocent either, I would shamelessly flirt with men that never meant anything to me. In my defense, Scarlett never gave me that much attention for so long. I had the right to. Although that comes out very badly and it makes me look like I have no sympathy or morals.

I took off my dazzling purple dress that had a low V-cut on my chest. Scarlett bought it for me the day before the premiere happened, it was the only time I was grateful for. I could say that I liked living that wealthy life; having an A-List wife, going to the fanciest restaurants, and owning a couple of yachts, I was living every girl’s dream life.

Until I became sick of it. So sick that I wanted to kill myself. Though, I’m speaking metaphorically.

Scarlett sighed, her nose flaring with such pure anger, and grabbed the bowl. She ate it with her chopsticks, munching it loudly so that I could hear it from a distance. She sniffed, wiping her nose with the length of her finger, and said with a hoarse tone: “For a woman like you, you’re fucking mental. I mean, I gave you everything, literally everything! And you complain about this one single thing? It’s ridiculous.”

With that assumption, I marched my way back to the kitchen and pointed at her with glaring eyes. I was upset about her saying that, let alone of her not knowing what really went downhill. If she only knew, if she only thanked me, we weren’t having this conversation.

“You’re a drug addict,” I tell her, which was kind of a fact. “You sniff that shit all day long until you want to fuck me and I would say no! You tried–Oh my god, you’re sick as I am.”

Scarlett threw her fork across the room and yelled with spit flying out of her mouth, “I would not fucking rape you! Yes, I do admit I snort that shit but I would never EVER lay my hands on you.”

“Bullshit Scarlett,” I laughed, clapping my hands together – as if it were pure comedy; which it was. “Fine, maybe not in bed. But you ask for so much! I’m not even your wife anymore, I’m your god damn personal maid who cleans up your mess all the time!”

“I never asked you to do it,” she said, clearly annoyed but leaning more to anger; her face shows it all. “I never asked you to fucking clean up my mess!”

“But I did it because I love you!” I started loudly, my nose prodding with anger as both of my fists clenched so that I could feel it through my skin. Scarlett clenches her jaw, hard. She swirled her tongue all over her cheeks – making me angrier. I continued helplessly, “I’m your wife. And I have to take care of you, who else will?”

“Maybe one of your fucking suitors.”

I couldn’t defend myself from that. But, there were no regrets about it either. Maybe because those men treated me with respect while Scarlett was the one who’s degrading on me all the time. I’d say she wasn’t so decent lately, especially towards someone like me. Her wife.

“You knew the reason why,” I said, the tip of my fingers pressed hard against the cold dark wooden table. She knows that I was infuriated, but she liked it. She loved it. “You know damn why.”

“Doesn’t give you an excuse to cheat on me.”

“I wasn’t–Oh my god! You still don’t get it, do you?” I scoffed loudly, rolling my eyes and she noticed how rude I was. She clenched her jaw and tried grabbing me by the neck but I immediately slapped her arm, making her reatract back and held onto her arm with a hiss.

“What the fuck?!”

“Let’s not forget you were flirting with other women too,” I stated with my nose flaring with anger. “I only did that because you never gave me the simplest attention! I mean, was there something wrong with me? Truly, there it was! You are so ignorant, Scarlett. It’s fucking exhausting.”

Before Scarlett could speak, I turned around and looked at the drawers that were near in front of the lounge room. I brought out a document that looked like caramel and placed it on the table, making a loud bam sound. She knew what it was, it was fairly obvious. Despite the look I was giving her, how angry I was, she knew that it was that paper.

“I forgot to mention that I filed for a divorce,” I tell her with my hand around my waist while my other one was at the edge of the table. I chewed the inside of my left cheek and added, “I want this marriage to be over.”

Scarlett harshly grabs the document and pulls up the paper, looking down that I have signed it. It was a little smudged – probably because I was in tears while doing it – but anyway, she stared into me and shook her head.

“No.”

I quirked my eyebrows in disbelief. “You have to sign that. I no longer want to be with you anymore.”

“This is fucking ridiculous!” Scarlett threw her hands in the air and removed the scarf that was wrapped around her neck. “We–You can’t just give up!”

“Didn’t I cheat on you?”

“And I also did, didn’t I? But here we are, fighting!”

I scoffed as I crossed my arms tightly around myself. “You called me a skank not just five minutes ago! Yes, I did say that you are a drug addict but you keep saying the nastiest words at me, ever since you’ve become so distant.”

Scarlett laughed, but in sarcasm. She presses her index finger and her thumb across her forehead, feeling her temple thump with pain. Everything was happening so fast, it was like she didn’t have time to explain on her side. In just a few minutes, this marriage might fall into pieces and it’s not something she wishes for.

“I’m sorry baby, okay? I shouldn’t have called you that,” there was some sincerity in Scarlett’s tone but I wasn’t convinced that she meant it. She smiled, way too softly, and continued, “I was just angry. You know, I can say things when I’m angry.”

Was that an excuse? Scarlett is being manipulative about it, she’s trying to brainwash me that calling me a skank is an okay thing – when it’s not. I wasn’t going to fall for this, ever again.

“I won’t change my mind about this one.”

She took a few steps until her body was behind me and wrapped me around like a blanket, her arms hugging my lower waist. Scarlett sighed and kissed the exposed skin on my neck and muttered, “I’m sorry, baby. Let’s forget about this, please. Let’s not do this.”

I was falling a little back when her lips were all over my neck as if trying to swoon me over to forgive her little act. But, she still doesn’t get why I was so upset. I might as well have been delusional at this point, and maybe she was too – I’d say we both were.

“Scarlett,” I sighed through my nose and dropped her hands from my waist, hard. I turned my head and shook my head, “I’m sorry, but I really can’t be with you anymore.”

I left the room and stripped off my clothes, feeling the cold harsh breeze against my sensitive skin. I could hear a caded sound of Scarlett yelling and going out of the house with a loud slam of the door. We lived in the woods where no obsessed paparazzi could find us, I merely suggested this idea to her, and she agreed.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” Scarlett stomps her foot on the ground repeatedly, almost as if she’s going insane – which she was. This wasn’t supposed to happen, they were going to have the loveliest night until her psychotic wife – which was me – was going nuts into something that wasn’t worth fighting for. Scarlett never meant to cheat on her, maybe she was also exaggerating it. There was no cheating, it was just simple flirtation.

“Fucking slut, doesn’t know her fucking place,” she mutters with her lips dried up to the cold wind and sat on the log that was near in the dark woods. “Acting like she’s the fucking victim, fucking whore! You are a slut! A skanky whore!”

I could hear her so clearly, yet so far. And, I wasn’t even offended by her words at this point. It was painted all over me; I wouldn’t be surprised if the article calls me a skank. I was one, I was.

I took a short warm shower while Scarlett was having a tantrum outside, it felt like peace for once. I was alone, bathing myself with lavender soap, and thought about possible ways of murdering my wife. Well, not in a literal sense. She was getting sick in the head, or maybe that’s just me. I got out, did my skincare, and wore a white tank top along with black sweatpants.

Once I was done, her tantrum seemed to stop. She came back in with her puffed eyes and grabbed the nearest bottle of whiskey, taking a large mouthful of it. She goes to the living room and sees me on the floor – lying like a painless body.

Scarlett sits down near me and holds my leg gently. She mutters, “I’m sorry for the fighting and screaming. I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that.”

I nodded, closing my eyes.

“It’s fine.”

Without opening my eyelids, Scarlett was above me, kissing my trembling lips. I stilled when her hand was on my waist, pinning me back down on the floor while she inserts her tongue inside my cold mouth. We kissed, maybe for a while, until I pushed her off with a giggle erupting from my voice.

“We probably shouldn’t do that,” I murmured while Scarlett nips on my chin, then to my bottom lip like some hungry animal. She shook her head and whispered close to my nose:

“I want to fuck you here right now, baby.”

“But Scarlett,” I teased, with a fake pout as our bodies danced together for attention. “Maybe it’s a bad idea.”

“How come having sex is a bad idea?” she asked, groaning impatiently as her right hand groped my breast – making myself moan quietly when she began to massage my breast roughly. “You love me, don’t you baby girl?”

“Of course I do, honey.”

She smirks and pecks my lips before saying: “Then I can fuck you, hm? Come on, it’ll feel good.”

“We are literally fighting–”

Scarlett groans with frustration and stands up, waving her hands in the air as she begins to feel angry again. She says with a yell, “We never have sex anymore, and now you have to ruin it.”

I scoffed and leapt at her, pointing hard at her chest with my index finger – which hurt a little. I said, mocking her tone: “You are being a bitch! When I tell you it’s a bad idea, you storm off like some fucking kid.”

“Are you fucking blaming this on me?” Scarlett turns around and takes the whiskey bottle from her hands, pouring it all over my chest like some slob. She smirked, throwing it across the room that made a loud shattering sound – I almost flinched.

“See, look what kind of a slut you are.”

With the adrenaline rush I was holding back, I grabbed her by the neck but unsuccessfully pushed her against the wall; she had her grip on me, too tightly. I screamed with so much terror, “You are such a pathetic woman! You treat me like I’m nobody, yet I will give you everything!”

She let go of both of my hands and saw how red my mark was around her neck. The blonde huffed, muttering something, and walked behind me, throwing her hands in the air and screaming back.

“You are an attention seeker! You don’t want me,” she says, laughing wearily. “You want fame! Money! Not my love!”

Somehow, I think Scarlett has become a douchebag without a doubt. When I look at her, I feel sick and numb. It’s like I don’t even know who I’m talking to at this point or who I love. With all the degradation she has given me, I don’t see the point of being in love with her. She’s sick.

“You make me feel awful, Scarlett,” I stated with a trembling unmelodic voice, which was embarrassing in this situation. “I wish you could fucking kill me instead of loving you. You make me feel sick whenever I have to be with you, I want that divorce paper to be signed by this morning. I do not want to be with–”

“You’re so ungrateful! A fucking slut with no self-esteem,” Scarlett yells, her veins popping up in her neck as she slams her hands on the countertop with a slightly red face. “I hate you!”

“Well, I hate you more!”

“I HATE YOU THE MOST!” she screams as tears fill up in her eyes, wiping them roughly with her arm, and continues to scream – her voice wavering. “I will fuck every woman in this town and make you realize how unimportant you are to me. You are nothing but the woman I saved from despair.”

The audacity she has said makes my skin prickle with such anger that it is inflaming throughout my body. But, she was also not wrong. Scarlett did save me from my awful past, but I was the one who worked for it. Not her. Although, I did thank her for everything that she has done for me. Have I ever heard her say that from her mouth? Not even once.

And that’s why my anger is above my head, it’s because Scarlett never shows appreciation for me. I do deserve better than that. I do know my worth.

I played with my tongue around my cheeks and turned around, looking at the empty kitchen and finding a knife that was left unused. Then, being delusional as I was, I grabbed it and played with the point against my finger. Scarlett’s eyes widens with fear and took a step back – her hands in the air to stop me from stabbing her; which wasn’t the point at all.

“Y/N, you have to drop that right now.”

I shook my head, smiling like a psychopath, and whispered in a soft tone: “Do you know how much I have wanted to kill myself because of you?”

There was a broad silence, but she shook her head. You see, this is why I want to file for divorce. Because of these little things, she cannot notice them at all.

“Well you are incredibly blind, Scar,” I chuckled darkly, using her nickname to threaten her more – which it worked. I pointed out the know how much I appreciate you doing for me. And, I can’t get a simple thank you?”

“Y/N–”

“No,” I cut her off, wiping the tears from my eyes as I walked closer to her weakening body. “You don’t understand how much I want to die because of you. I can’t believe we are playing this kind of part in your movie. How ironic is it?”

My wife looks at me and then at the knife that was dangerously close to her, she backed up a little until she fell on the floor with a thudding sound; making her whimper in fear. She whispers in a defeating voice:

“Baby–My love, drop that now, please. Let’s talk about this.”

I rolled my eyes playfully and murmured, “Fine.” she watches me as I drop the knife on the floor, making a clinking sound that was surrounded by the room. I knelt on the floor, feeling my tears dry up on my cheek, and told her nonchalantly,

“You make me sick every day, Scarlett. I do hope you understand where I’m coming from. It’s not about cheating, no. I am so glad that I flirted with those men; because that makes you realize how pathetic you are to me.”

We both stared at each other with such intensity that I could hold onto it forever. I’ve always wanted this moment, this moment of the idea of scaring her. I was doing the right thing. Although, I didn’t want to kill her – more like to myself that I want to kill.

It was never her, it was me. But, it was also her fault for becoming this person that I barely recognize.

“You’re the love of my life,” Scarlett whispered with a trembling voice as our stare began to soften. “You… you’re my everything. Don’t leave me, please. You can’t.”

I scoffed, smiling while I bowed my head down. I know what I was doing in this situation, I wasn’t dumb. This is what happens when you have the shittiest wife who degrades you every second. I was sick of her, and I know she felt that with me.

I lifted my head and my eyes watered from even thinking about the past mistakes that have happened to me. She sympathizes with my pain, but not really knowing how much burden I was carrying with her.

“Who helped you when you couldn’t be recognized by people anymore?”

She nods her head at me, saying silently that it was always me. Scarlett whispered, “You. It’s always been you.”

“Exactly,” I nodded with her in agreement. “And, did you hear me say thank you each time you rise up?”

She nods again, see how pathetic she is?

“Thank you for realizing how much of a wife I was to you,” I responded with a louder voice, standing up from my own two feet and walking away from her weak self. I realize that I will never have to see her face again, and I thank god for that opportunity. I felt free, somehow. When I don’t look at her, I feel freedom.

I yelled, “Sign those damn papers. I’m out of your god damn house.”

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