#i mean u can like who am i to forbid you but what's the point when that's literally the whole vibe of it

[jealousmartini]

hi! i saw ur post where u mention age change with loa and could u talk more about that? cause i just turned 20, but i wanna be 17 again just so i can experience teenage things (i had depression and extreme social anxiety my whole teenagehood). i wanna feel young and do things right, apply everything i know now to this time in my life cause i can't help but feeling so old speacially since i have zero "firsts", like i'm 20 and no first crush or first kiss (ik it's not the end of the world, but i want back the expirences i was stolen from). i don't wanna over-explain myself nor trauma dump on u, but basically i just wanna start over yk? i know nothing is impossible to loa, truly know, but this one wish makss me insecure cause that will mean i was born in 2007 instead of 2004 and my old classmates werent really my classmates which is okay cause i never liked them but instead i had different ones that i don't know? i don't know if i'm making sense here, sorry to be asking u these things but ur the only person i've seen talking about age change so i'll be very thankful to anything u have to say to me. hope u have a good day :)

This ask unironically made me frown, like so hard, knowing that manifesters like you have to ask if starting over is okay because of the heavy misrepresentation and misunderstanding of manifesters and shifters who age change.

My love, OF COURSE you can. I cannot believe we have come to the point, on the interent as a whole, that people feel that they need to ask permission on what to do with THEIR LIVES, because the all high and mighty LOA police feel like they have the right to dictate what others should and shouldn't do with their lives.

And God forbid you don't obey them because then they'll throw every derogatory name, they'll diagnose you with every mental illness they want to insult you with (that they don't even understand), they'll assume that utmost worst about you, and take to their side of the community to shame you infront of them all. It's genuinely appalling.

Which is why I finally reminded myself a couple years ago that these people are not my mum. I have free will to do what I want with MY LIFE and whatever they say are nothing more than opinions that I can literally choose to listen to or to ignore. I refuse to fall into the trap of giving power, MY power away to outsiders and let them control me because real talk now, what are they actually going to do? At the end of the day they can cry, shout, rip their hair out on camera an tell me how insne I am for not having the same views as them, but none of that's stopping me from sleeping with their mum AND dad in another reality

Long story short, my answer is yes, you can start over and change the year you were born hun. You can do whatever you want because this is your call. Do what YOU want, not whatever the LOA police deems acceptable by their beliefs

[decolonize-the-everything]

(to preface this, i am white. figured i should make that known off the bat) i wanted to come bounce an idea off of you that i've been rolling around in my head for a bit. i have this pet theory that, for the population ill call here "white progressive queers who know very little about poc and racism", a large underpinning of this group's interaction with poc is a Fear of Fucking Up and more generally, moral purity thought. they (maybe even "we"- im still hopefully learning myself) get so paralyzed by this idea and line of thinking that goes something like this: "1) since i know nothing about poc & racism, then 2) clearly in discussions about these topics, i will fuck up and say something wrong or perhaps even Bigoted, which if i did 3) makes me an Irreparable Ontologically Evil Racist, hence 4) i should just be quiet and never ask questions/speak on these topics" which then results in said White Progressive Queer and those around them never learning. i wanted to know what you think abt this and tell me if im on the mark or not

also thank u for the work u do on this blog, ive found so many helpful resources through you

You're right. In my experience that's exactly how it is.

I want to add tho: yes they're uncomfortable that they might fuck up and be considered racists sure, but a huge part of that stems from the massive inability to place the discomfort where it belongs. Which is with their own guilt.

Instead they blame the conversations for making them uncomfortable.

And let's take some worthy notes here: this is not how white people feel all the time. Because white people are not uncomfortable making these fuck ups in front of other white people.

So it's not that the conversation is uncomfortable. They are made uncomfortable. And they are made uncomfortable because even when discussing anti-racism they step into the role of oppressor (the little fuck ups or accidentally bigoted comments) so naturally and God forbid other (not white) people can See how easy it is.

My advice for white people that are like this (that nobody asked for) is

Your fuckups do not define you but how you react to them does

Listen, respect, learn

That's it. That's the whole list. Say something bad? Apologize, but don't over-explain yourself. Ask how to fix it. Google how you fucked up so you understand why it wasn't okay. Google again to get idea of how your fuck up hurts people. Google some more to make sure you don't do it again. Go to some safe space and ask some clarifying questions. Listen, respect, learn.

Maybe the people you fucked up with don't forgive you and that's okay, they don't have to. But YOU won't ever make anyone feel bad or less than in the same way ever again and that's what matters.

Having one less person making racist comments matters even if it's a struggle for that person to get to that point.

I need y'all to understand that none of you are gonna just wake up being suddenly perfect anti-racist allies. And we will literally never ever have allies like that if y'all refuse to even sit with your own discomfort.

•°•°•

This weird morality issue white people have over looking racist is also just such a non-problem. Like if y'all want a PoC perspective: white people are already being racist ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯ ....we Already see y'all as racists. And also I'm gonna experience racism anyway so I'd rather it be because someone was just being ignorant on the path to anti-racism.

Y'all are so worried about how shit Looks that you can't be bothered how really things are? Like you're so afraid of looking racist you'd allow yourselves to continue being actually ignorant and casually racist. And to avoid what? Being uncomfortable for a minute? Being called-out? A mean comment?

We are trying to stop hate crimes and genocide. Like that's what we are dealing with okay. Accountability for your actions is an acquired taste but I think y'all can handle some discomfort considering.

[cloudcountry]

yippe for auburn writing twst again 🥳🥳

what about leona x male reader who gets headaches and migraines a lot (suffering through a headache rn -_-) also sry if its kinda lame i like never know what to request for writing requests lmao

SUMMARY: leona doesn't tolerate any interruptions when you're hurting.

COMMENTS: its not lame :(( dont say that about your request loser i'll whack u on the head with a leona plush

ALSO please have mercy if this is ooc i always had trouble writing for leona and now im rusty :(( i am so sorry if i do your man wrong I TRIED MY BEST I SWEAR

Leona isn’t heartless. He may seem like that to people outside of Savanaclaw, to people who don’t understand him, but ultimately he cares a whole lot for the people who worm their way into his heart.

You have a headache? He’s sending Ruggie for a cool, wet cloth to put on your forehead, he’s shutting all the curtains in his room to make it as dark as possible, and he’s curling up next to you.

If anyone aside from Ruggie knocks on the door, Leona will hiss at them to leave you alone. They get the message after a deep “leave him the fuck alone” passes through the door. Sevens forbid anyone knocks too loud, he’ll bite their tail off for disturbing you.

If you need medication for a migraine, Leona will be on that so fast. Only the best for his boyfriend! (And by that, of course, I mean he will send Ruggie for it and check to make sure it’s exactly what you need.)

Ruggie can pretend to be offended all he wants (“What, you don’t think I checked his medication myself?”) but he knows Leona just cares about you. He knows better than to tease though...he’d like to keep his tail, thank you.

If you didn’t know any better, you’d say you having a headache or migraine makes Leona grumpier. It makes you smile just a little bit—he cares so much about you and it really shows.

If he catches you smiling he will point it out, mind you. He may make a snide comment or too, but he always has his signature smirk on his face so you know he isn’t serious.

He makes sure you stay in bed—he doesn’t need you walking around and hurting yourself because he got dizzy or being assaulted by the bright lights and noises of the lounge outside. So he’ll throw his tail over you and sleep, holding you until you feel better.

[transmascissues]

holy crap dude, i only sent that anon because this blog is called “transmascissues” and “parents reacting way too personally” is not a transmasc issue, it’s a trans issue. “moms react with crying” and dads react with violence? what is your point? do you REALLY think that the difference in experience between transmascs and transfems are THAT different??? why do the details matter when the reasoning is the same? i am a trans man and i know exactly what you’re talking about. i just think it’s weird that you are basically saying trans guys have it worse. you’re literally ONLY focused on your own experiences and u assume youre the only one who’s gone through something like that?

jesus fucking christ…

alright, let’s do this fast so i can go back to living my life.

if you think this is about something as simple and general as “parents reacting way too personally,” you clearly don’t understand exactly what i’m talking about, even if you are a trans man. maybe if you actually read what i’m saying instead of just looking for anything in it that you can get mad at, you’d have a better understanding of what i’m referring to.

“why do the details matter” so you do understand that the details are different and you just think we shouldn’t be allowed to talk about them? that’s…somehow even worse, honestly. do you really think the way transphobia is enacted makes no difference if the intent is the same? do you really think trans people should never want to express their specific experiences and find people who relate? do you think the details don’t change the emotional experience for the person being targeted at all? do you think victims of transphobia shouldn’t be allowed to seek out people who were victimized in the same specific way and who understand that emotional experience? the details absolutely matter.

where did i say this being different from what transfems typically experience means we have it worse? i’ll give you a hint: the answer is nowhere. i didn’t say that. i have never once said on this blog that anyone has it worse than anyone else because i think that’s a ridiculous way to talk about basically any issue.

god forbid i talk about my own experiences. god forbid i make posts about the things being directed to me in my own home by my own family. god forbid i have a real life and real emotions and exist as a real person not just a robot that spits out impersonal theory. i’m talking about my experiences because they’re the ones i live with every day. you might be able to come on here and get mad at me and then go about your day, but when i log off i’m just going back to the exact transphobia i described, so yeah, i’m focused on it. fucking sue me.

if you send me anything else you owe me $50 per second i waste on reading it because this is getting exhausting and you obviously have no interest in actually listening to me.

[mrs-monaghan]

Hi! I love your blog and what you say, I had read so much of your answers to anons, so, what are in your op the reasons why jikook are probably dating - what made you believe in them? And in your op after the military service will they be even more braver in showing their affection? (P.s sorry if I made errors eng is not my first language sorry sorry)

I am African. English isn't my first or 2nd language so u get no judgement from me. 😁

Okay story time

I first discovered BTS in 2015. I was just perusing on YT when I came across Boy in luv and I thought RM was so fucking hot. I’m a sucker for a goodlooking man (who isn’t?) And Boy in luv RM was fire to me 😂😂

i tell that to my Jikook friends and they keep laughing at me but at the time he was, okay? I can hear you laughing. Shut up! He owned that song

He was hot. Leave me alone 😒

And I am obsessed with this hairstyle so there’s also that. (When Jikook had this undercut 🤤) Also I am again obsessed with dimples. My fiance, it’s his dimples that attracted me to him. I kid u not. He he hee...

Anyhu, BIL RM was hot to young me and so I was watching that MV like daily. Then YT recommended BST and I  thought Jimin was pretty but I didn’t really stick around much. I just downloaded BIL and went about my life. Then last year I was on my Tiktok and BTS were at an award show and I saw who I now know is V vibing to Idol in his chair. And I was like; I know them. I wonder how Mr. Dimples is doing 🤭

I also really liked that song because it sounded kinda African and I immediately latched onto the Nikki remix coz I’m a big fan. So I watched Idol and a few other songs and that’s all she wrote.

Now I’m on tumblr answering asks about Jikook.

He he hee... Like afore mentioned i am African and we are super homophobic. A man can marry 16 wives and that’s okay but God forbid two men of the same age date only eo. A person can be a serial killer but oh well, at least he wasn’t gay!

So, much like society, my mind is programmed to think everyone is straight unless they say otherwise. So I did not think that any member of BTS could be gay. Like at all. And when I got into them properly, I binged run bts, bon voyage and ITS and still saw nothing.

1) I was working with the mentality that they are all straight.

2)I am reading subtitles and trying to look at the one who is speaking. Aint no way I will notice shenanigans happening with other members that I’m not focused on.

Once I was done with their content I started watching compilations, and funny moments, etc. Mind you by this point I have forgotten about RM. Like I mentioned before I am a sucker for pretty men and Jimin is very pretty. Like abnormally pretty. Like, this motherfucker was glowing in a damn crowd how is this normal???

I don't think the fallen angel thing is a joke y'all. This man ain't normal 👀

RM may have brought me to BTS but it didn’t take long for the Jimin effect to hit me. So I was paying alot of attention to him. Which means when I didn’t have anymore official content to consume, (unbeknownst to me i had merely scratched the surface) I started looking for Jimin shit. And what happens when u stalk a specific member? Within no time u get a ship video. And that’s how I came across Yoonmin and boom! I was a Yoonminer. But I wouldn’t say I was that faithful to the ship because have you watched Jihope sexual tension videos? I’m sorry but they are 🔥🔥 completely out of context but still very well done. Also Jihope used to be the kings of fanservice so there is plenty of content.

I watched all Jimin ships and YouTube never once recommended me Jikook. Which is really weird. But then one day I saw “Jikook analysis" and it was by Mizgator and we all know how good and thorough she is. At first I was like; now what is a Jikook and why an analysis? But then Jimin was on the thumbnail so of course I clicked.

Mizgator made me believe in Jikook. I binge watched all her stuff and I couldn’t believe my eyes. And it was all so juicy and interesting I couldn’t stop. After I was done with her I looked for more and more and more until I had seen all Jikook analyses You tube had to show me.

That’s when I rewatched ITS and Bon Voyage with the eyes of a shipper and it was all there. I felt so dumb like; how did I not see it before?!

So sometimes I understand these antis and ot7 assholes. Because if you’re not looking for it, u certainly will not see it.

And its krazy because Jikook are like right in your face. The satellite/teleport thing is not even subtle. From both of them, not just JK.

Anyway, I joined a discord with like minded people who continued to point out things all the analyses I had watched didn’t pick up on. And I started noticing things too when rewatching everything. Its fun to rewatch stuff with a Jikook lense because they really are obvious guys. Its fascinating.

Anyway, all this is to say I am not like other people who say the following moments opened their eyes.

My eyes saw, but in my head they were straight so it was all nothing. Until I met Mizgator and my life has never been the same.

So,

What made you believe in them?

Mizgator

In your op after military service will they be even more braver in showing their affection?

Yes. I mention that here. And here. And then talk in depth (ish) about it here

What are in your op the reasons why Jikook are probably dating?

Anon this is a loaded question because it’s everything. Its the exclusive stuff they only do to/for eo. Its the 18+ moments. I mean especially the 18+ moments that have no hetero explanation whatsoever. It’s when Kjikookers tell us they defy what is usually the norm, culturally. It's how members react when they're Jikooking. It’s everything. Sometimes its hard to explain to an anti that we don’t believe in Jikook because of just one moment but because of so many things that when accumulated add to one big, humongous undeniable picture. U know?

Damn, this was a long answer but I hope you got what u came 4. Bless 🥰

[beautifulpersonpeach]

Hi BPP!

I want to ask u sth serious pls its ok to ignore. What is ur view of solo stans? Do u think solos are bad or army can be friends with them?

***

I’m not friends with any solo stans, Anon. I’ve said what I think about solos before so I won’t rehash it, but given what I said, any ‘friendships’ I’d have with the solo wouldn’t be genuine. I know it, so why bother, you know? Anyway, while I’m not friends with solos, there are a few I occasionally talk to who generally give me the gist of what’s current. They’re intelligent, able to form a proper argument in their heads and see from an opposite point of view. So in many ways, my kind of people… they just also happen to be more morally ambiguous than I am and a little bit sociopathic. So, of course, they’re solos. Anyway, the ones I sometimes see are good at keeping their opinions concise and coherent. I also really appreciate their extremely sardonic sense of humour. I’ve noticed solos are really good at that biting, cynical, but richly humoured commentary that war veterans take on during their third campaign. You get this sense especially from PJMs. Those bitches have fought taekookers every day of their lives. They’ve seen some shit. Because taekookers are the actual scum of the earth, backwater stupid, oloriburukus that god forbid you ever encounter in real life. And nobody has to deal with taekookers more than PJMs.

And so for that reason, when I receive a silly ask from someone who is obviously a PJM, I usually delete it before I even finish reading it. Quietly, respectfully (?), and promptly. Rather than post them for jokes or whatever (though this might happen later lol). Not like that’s something special - a lot of asks I think are weird do get deleted and every solo gets the same treatment from me.

I don’t like that solos are so myopic and pessimistic. I don’t like the mindset being a solo stan (especially the sort at the frontlines of dealing with other lunatics) forces you to inhabit. I do like that their communities are a bit more close knit than ARMY, but that also means that solo stans have much less variation in thought and belief, than ARMYs do. It kinda irks me too that a lot of them are really tunnel-visioned in particular ways. But at least they provide raw manpower for supplemental streams and sales. And for voting, solos are admittedly more disciplined on being consistent at this, than any other section of the fandom.

Too many of them just want to see it all burn. I don’t like that either.

And so, no Anon, I’m not friends with solos nor do I think it’s alright to be friends with one. But it’s not like you need my opinion anyway, since everyone here just does what they want.

[dulcewrites]

new chap of fcc… love u babe. DID WATCH THE NEW HOTD EP??? keep us updated on ur thoughts!!

Love you more 😘 glad you liked it!

Ok don’t hate me but I didn’t. I don’t have work on Wednesday so I may watch it then. But tbh I was tempted to do what I did last season and sort of catch up after the fact. I didn’t start watching s1 in real time till ep 8 (I binged the other eps the Friday and Saturday before). It actually helped me formulate my thoughts better. If that makes sense. Idk this fandom can be… a lot/overly negative for the sake of argument and it can be hard to enjoy it while airing. I don’t want to be fighting for my life as an Alicent girlie and an overall team green enjoyer lmao.

That being said I have seen a couple of clips and knows the basic beats simply by just being around so I will say:

- glad they gave Aegon Helaena and their family some development pre b&c. Can’t speak on actual b&c bc I haven’t seen it. Wish we got more of them as a unit in s1

- I think Emma and their acting skills does most of the work bc I don’t care about lucerys dying (sorry not sorry) but interested to see where grief takes Rhaenyra. How is she going to react to b&c.

- daemon is a loser wbk

- loving the dynamic they are setting up with Aemond. Not only him lean to the death being on purpose but also pointing out the honest hypocrisy of him ‘being the reason the war started’… while they already put Aegon on the throne 😭. Like yeah Luke dying def accelerated things. But at the end of the day, it all broke the moment Aegon got a crown on his head. Naturally Aemond would feel some type of way about a parent choosing Rhaenyra over him (in his mind)… again. And this time it’s the parent that defended him. That has to suck

- I guess the thing (outside of b&c) that people have the most things to say about is Alicent and Criston. Soooo I have mixed feelings on this. On one hand, I’m of the belief that BOTH rhaenicent and alicole are better left in the margines… aka things left unsaid and unconsumated. I like the will they or won’t they of both. That means I wasn’t like jumping up and down knowing they hooked up, especially since we apparently don’t see how?? I could be wrong about that but that’s what i am assuming not watching. I think I’d appreciate it more seeing the first time or how these ultra repressed people got to having casual sex. But I will say even as someone who enjoys rhaenicent, that I like the idea of Alicent figuring her sexuality out for herself. Even if she realizes it’s not for her or hates herself afterward, she deserves a chance to try it out. I’m not of the belief that Criston is just gonna turn on her one day.

Also I feel more inclined to defend it simply bc this fandom is weird and now people are taking their distain for alicole out on Fabien. What we aren’t gonna do is demonize a man of color for some ship. It is to the point where people want to make it seem like Liv doesn’t like him which we know is just not true. It is also extra icky when it comes from white people bc why are you calling Criston a dog…. While actively stanning white character who behave the same or worse way. It gives the same vibes as the misogynist who love the male characters of the show but hate the women. Like bffr

This in general brings up a larger point for me that I haven’t really known how to put into words. I feel like a group of people - mainly rhaenicents (and once again I say this as someone who thinks that relationship is one of the most if not the most interesting in the whole show) - who act as if Alicent needs to hate everyone BUT Rhaenyra. Like she must hate her children, her father, and Criston but god forbid you bring up any resentment she may have towards Rhaenyra. Alicent is allowed to be sad about her childhood being taken and love her kids. She’s allowed to resent the position her father put her in and seek his council. She is allowed to know what Criston is capable of and understand he has been there for her for more than a decade. Just like she can move to put her son on the throne and miss what she had with Rhaenyra. Alicent is very complex and that should be seen through all her relationship.

One gripe I will say about alicole is like… what is the payoff. It is to make his eventual death hurt more? Is it more division amongst the greens? Is it for the guilt of it all?

[slimepuparibaba]

Stars and Asters: Chapter 1.0 - "How to Train Your Drunk Bards' Dragon" Act 1... or something

Ari's Braindead Notes:

guys i know liyue was included in patch 1.0 okay but listen cut me some slack im literally covering all of mondstadt in this fucking chapter kJHAKLDFHAKLJDFHL

also yes characters interacting time, this will be a lot more fun for me

we do be skipping around to get to the more interesting points

if u wanna like make this fully fledged by all means have at it or like do anything with it i rlly dont care plz just end my misery i am like at my computer dying, wondering what ive done with my life

this is so unserious ok im so not sorry

anyway

without further ado:

CHAPTER 1.0 ACT 1: WHO'S READY FOR SOME MOTHA-FLIPPIN TUTORIALS?!

[WORD COUNT: 8.2k words (i am... so sorry)]

Areas of Genshin canon covered: Beginning of Game to End of Four Temples of Mondstadt

&lt;prev> <masterlist> <next>

Ah, Teyvat. Beautiful, innit? Amazing world full of--

Oh shit, nope, wait. Nevermind. Wake up, bitches, time to run, because the Cataclysm (chat noir??) happened.

So we introduce our two heroes, Aether and Lumine. They wanna escape Teyvat, and then Miss Totally Not Kiana The Unknown God, Asmoday (we think that's her name) shows up, forbidding the Travelers from escaping.

Fun Fact: That Unknown God? That's our corrupted God Program right there, taking the form of the most powerful entity in the world at present to exert control. So far, nothing's gone wrong. Haha. Haha.

Hah.

Anyway, Aether and Lumine decide to fight her, flying towards her, and then just as they dive up and are about to strike, the Unknown God freezes Lumine first.

Panicking, Aether calls out to Lumine before diving at the Unknown God. Yup. Aether is the prota--

Nope. Wait. Hold on. Wh... What's happening with Lumine's prison?

Suddenly, something LITERALLY NO ONE SEES COMING, Lumine breaks out, and through some unknown ability, is able to teleport RIGHT BEHIND THE UNKNOWN GOD, THIS CLOSE to getting a headshot.

Panicked, the Unknown God instead freezes Aether. Lumine calls out his name, then goes to strike again, only to be frozen second, crying out for the Unknown God to give Aether back.

Lumine, in the World System's eyes, has now been fully registered as the Traveler. While Aether, registered as the Abyss Prince.

So, fun fact: according to the "original world seed", that wasn't supposed to happen. Aether was supposed to be the protagonist, not Lumine. Like... something was wrong.

And the God Program? Was pissed.

She kept demanding that the World System reset. Again and again, but the World System refused. The only way the World System would reset was if the God Program reset with it.

God Program: Everything went wrong... you were supposed to be the Abyss Monarch, not your brother...! God Program: No matter... I can simply restart-- World System: Failed to execute deletion due to preexisting condition. God Program: ...Condition? What condition?! The condition claimed that her brother remain the protagonist. If she fails that condition-- World System: Teyvat ver. 5410010 World Console Rule No. 1 - The twin who is first reduced to nothing via the Unknown God is embedded with the Abyssal Monarch spirit data, whereas the leftover twin is embedded with the Traveler Twin spirit data. God Program: But resetting is the only way to get the story to work-- World System: Teyvat ver. 5410010 World Console Rule No. 1 Clause 1 - Once the Traveler and Abyssal Twins have been decided, this decision is permanent and no resetting is allowed. The only options include: deletion of the world console and the Overseer, continue with the storyline. God Program: ...That little bitch... God Program: Show me her data. Now.

The World System pulls up Lumine's data, and something of note is... different about her.

Avatar Name: Female Traveler Nickname: Lumine Model Type: Girl Weapon Type: Sword Element: Changeable Special Condition: Carrier of the Charitas Gene

For simplicity's sake, I'm not gonna explain what the Charitas Gene is. But the God Program is definitely not happy about it, far as I can tell.

(eyo ma'am we get it, youre miguel o'hara but a bitch goddamn--)

And so, Lumine falls asleep for 500 years. And now, we reach Mondstadt's beach, where she talks to Paimon and recaps her on everything that happened.

Paimon is also a literal fish out of water (get it? Because. Because she was fished out? ...okay, I'll see myself out--)

The two became close friends over the past two months and Paimon decides that their first stop should be Mondstadt! Which is. Literally right there. (like c'mon guys, it took you this long to figure it out?)

Also because I like showcasing character moments, please enjoy the two's banter. Please. They're actual sisters.

Lumine: You know... I never really understood how you could've nearly drowned. Paimon: What do you mean by that? Lumine: Oh, nothing... Lumine: I mean, you could've just flown out of the water. Paimon: Hey! J-Just so you know, there's LOTS of other animals that can fly, but they ended up drowning too!  Lumine: That's because their wings got damaged and they couldn't fly out the water. And, as far as I'm aware, Paimon? You don't have wings. Paimon: (unconvincingly) W-well... u-uh... it was... Paimon's legs! Yeah, her legs! They were super sore! Lumine: (chuckling) Mhm. Sure, they were.

The two head over to the first Statue of the Seven they find, and Paimon catches Lumine up on some of the "lore" of the world--about the Archons, about the elements, the statues. And then, immediately, Paimon just. Tells Lumine to touch the statue.

Paimon: Hey, maybe you should try touching it! Lumine: Uh, what-- Paimon: You heard Paimon! Touch the statue and pray to it! Lumine: Those are two entirely different things--

And so, Lumine resonates with Anemo...

...and accidentally windblades herself backwards onto the ground.

Paimon reveals that Lumine was likely blessed with Barbatos' blessing, the Anemo Archon, and that Mondstadt City would gladly welcome her in (to Lumine's confusion, because that's like calling the capital of England "England City", but whatever--)

Before they can decide to move there, gigantic-ass dragon flies over. The two go to check it out and see a green bard (we know it's Venti, this is very much obvious by now) talking to a dragon.

As the two peek in, Paimon accidentally floats too close, losing balance and bumping into Lumine, who creates a large blast of Anemo energy, startling the dragon.

The dragon flies off and Venti disappears. When they go to search for it, they find a red teardrop and have. No clue what to do with it. Lumine holds it in her hand.

Lumine: Huh... never seen anything like this before. Paimon: Paimon hasn't either! She can't tell what it is, but looks like we'll just have to take it with us! Lumine: You're saying we have to hold this the entire way? It's not like I have a bag or anything... Paimon: U-uh, m-maybe we...

The crystal randomly dissipates while the two ponder and Lumine and Paimon scream.

Lumine: T-THE CRYSTAL?! Paimon: WHERE'D IT GO?! WHERE'D IT GO?! Lumine: DON'T ASK ME! I WAS JUST HOLDING IT AND THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN--

The crystal reappears in Lumine's held out hands. Paimon and Lumine scream again, Lumine falling backwards as it hovers.

Lumine: It just... a-appeared again. Paimon: M-maybe... perhaps... Paimon: Oh! Maybe you have a psychic storage space that you learned about from another world!

Half-right. It's the World System working in the "game inventory" mechanic.

Lumine: Yeah, no, I don't think that's it.

It's kinda that.

Anyway, Lumine tests it again, concentrating carefully, only for it to dissipate into thin air. She stares at her palms and--yeah, no, it's definitely gone now.

Paimon: And now it's gone again! Lumine: Seems like along with my Anemo prowess, I can summon items and store them at well... Paimon: So it IS a psychic storage space... Lumine: I'd like to think of it as a virtual inventory. Paimon: Haaah, well, if that's really what you think, then Paimon won't correct you...

Virtual Inventory now introduced as an actual living breathing mechanic that Lumine can utilize as hammer space, they trek to the Whispering Woods, where they meet Amber, who is all like "hey you kinda sus"

Paimon and Lumine give Amber some sas, hilarity ensuing

Amber: You don't look like citizens of Mondstadt. Explain yourselves! Paimon: WE'RE NOT DOING ANYTHING ILLEGAL! Lumine: (internally) Only criminals say that kind of thing...?! Lumine: Sorry, ignore her. She's not good under pressure. I'm Lumine, and that's Paimon. We're really not looking for any trouble. Amber: Hmm... Lumine and Paimon, huh? Doesn't sound like any local names to me. Lumine: (internally) Not wrong... Amber: Well, other than your odd clothing style, you're clear, Lumine. Lumine and Paimon: (internally) Like your clothing is anymore conventional?!

No more time for chit chat, girls, because we got an issue with Hilichurs! Lumine feels like she can hear some sort of "Amber has joined your party" ringing in the back of her head, but she shakes it off as something she thought of herself.

So they find a Hilichurl Camp, and here is where we immediately start deviating.

Paimon: Whoa…! An entire Hilichurl Camp! Lumine: A Hili-what? Amber: Those. Hilichurls.

Amber points to the Hilichurls eating and dancing around a fire. Some are sharpening their axes, others stringing their bows.

Lumine: ...they look... kinda cute. Amber: Yeah, they seem cute, but they can get aggressive to people like you and me. They're too close to the city, so my task this time is to clear out their camp. Lumine: Wait, why can't we just say 'hi' and ask them politely to leave? Amber: B-Because they don't speak our language--wait, Traveler? Where are you going?!

Lumine then decides it's a smart idea to walk up to one of the hilichurls who's happily eating a Sunsettia. She kneels down and tries to talk to them.

Lumine: Um... Hi there, little fella. Hilichurl: ...? Ya!

The Hilichurl stands up, grabbing the club next to him and ready to hit Lumine. He drops his Sunsettia on the ground, but Lumine holds out her arm as if trying to show she means no harm.

Lumine: H-hey, no... uh... no fight! Paimon: Lumine, they won't listen! Hilichurls aren't-- Lumine: Shh, I think I'm making progress...!

Though she struggles, she tries to reason with the Hilichurl and hands it the Sunsettia, hoping to reason.

Lumine: Here… go on, take it.

The Hilichurl looks at her hand, then to the others in his group. They too seem puzzled, but do nothing. Finally, the Hilichurl takes the Sunsettia into his palms and stares at Lumine, before dancing a bit.

Paimon: …h-he… he seems happy…! Hilichurl: Valo valo! Ya mi tomo!

A flash of recognition appears in Lumine's eyes, as if she understands what the Hilichurl is saying. This shouldn't be normal, but she knows anyway. So, she continues conversing.

Lumine: You're welcome. Hey, do you think you can move the camp a little farther into the forest? Hilichurl: Dala? Lumine: Mm… mostly because the other people might be too scared of you, so they'll try and attack. Hilichurl: Mm…

The Hilichurl turns to his friends and starts speaking, Lumine understanding that he's requesting to move the camp farther from the city. After a bit, he returns to conversing with Lumine. Paimon and Amber look from afar in bewilderment.

Amber (shouting): What did he say? Lumine (shouting): He said that they were told to be stationed here by someone, but since I asked nicely, they'll move!

The Hilichurls seem happy that they were able to communicate, and suddenly, the one friendly Hilichurl runs over to the inside of the main hut, motioning Lumine to come over.

Lumine follows, and in front of the Friendly Hilichurl is a small, common chest. Lumine, in shock, looks at him as if affirming what the Hilichurl is offering. He nods in response, and Lumine opens it. Inside, however, is something uncommon…

Inside of the chest is a sword and a bow. The sword is glowing brightly with an aqua-green hue, while the bow seems to have the same sigil that Amber wears on her outrider outfit.

The Hilichurls wave goodbye to the trio as Lumine hands the bow over to Amber, keeping the sword in her grasp. Paimon and Amber are both astonished, as the Hilichurls fulfill their promise and start to move out further into the forest.

Amber: …How… did you do that? Paimon: Paimon's never seen someone interact with Hilichurls like that before… Lumine: Wait, really? No one's asked nicely? Amber: I mean, we've tried, but they couldn't understand us. It usually led to them getting upset and lashing out at us, so whenever they see a person, they strike first on reflex. Lumine: Well… that one Hilichurl said he'd try putting in a good word for me with the other tribes. So, maybe the issue's solved? Paimon: You understood Hilichurlian! That's amazing! Lumine: Just a bit. I'm more surprised he understood me. He seems like a sweet guy--seems like he's the youngest of the group. Amber: All that information from a single exchange with a Hilichurl… Ella Musk would be impressed…

Aside from me restraining myself from wishing Ella Musk's name was changed, the group then realizes that Amber gained a Favonius Warbow. And, for some reason... Luine has the Aquila Favonia?

No one really knows why, but anyway, the group heads back to Mondstadt. Amber catches 'em up: Stormterror is a big dragon that brings gigantic storms whenever he's near, and so Mondstadt's in a tight spot. The Knights of Favonius also have to deal with Hilichurls moving closer and closer into the city, but Lumine realizes something.

Lumine (internally): It doesn't add up... the Hilichurl I talked to said they were told to be stationed there, like they were told by a tactician. Not to mention the person in green who talked to the dragon… something's not right.

Detective Lumine, who decided to turn into Rosa from Tears of Themis for a good bit, then goes with Paimon and Amber to Mondstadt.

They take a tour around the city, which is pretty empty, and learn about what Mondstadt is like. Lumine makes mental note to never indulge in any of the taverns because she apparently might get too caught up in taste-testing wine to the point where she'll become flat-out drunk. Sasuga Traveler.

And then, Lumine is given a Wind Glider by Amber. She glides around, and suddenly, when she lands, the wind glider dissipates. Amber explains this to Lumine. More mechanics.

Amber: Wow, you did pretty well! And it seems like the Wind Glider recognized you as it's owner. Paimon: "Recognized"? What's that mean? Amber: : Some of the items in this world have a will imbedded in them, like my new bow! Amber summons the bow in her hands, which seems to come out of nowhere. This surprises Paimon and Lumine. Amber: See, if an item recognizes you as it's owner and synchronizes with you, you can summon it at will! Practically appears and disappears when you ask it to. Cool trick, right? Paimon: So that's what it is! Amber: Though it's a bit strange. Usually, only Vision holders can achieve this, but… as far as I can see, you don't have a Vision, Traveler. Lumine: …a Vision? Amber: Yeah. A Vision! You see, a Vision is--!

Woops, sorry walking exposition, but we got a dragon to deal with! A tornado begins to form--multiple tornadoes in fact, and as Amber and Paimon run away, Lumine gets Dorothy'd up into the air. Paimon and Amber try to hold her down, but nope.

But, with Venti's help, Lumine remains stable. She's instructed by Venti to "deal with Dvalin".

Venti: You're doing great! Keep it up! Lumine: It'd be nice if you could've introduced yourself before you put me in this situation! Venti: You really want an introduction at a time like this?! Mondstadt needs your help! Lumine: Okay, but when this is all over, I EXPECT answers!

On the ground, Paimon is watching worriedly for Lumine and is this close to flying in, but Amber is busy evacuating citizens.

Amber: Paimon, there's some citizens trying to seek shelter! We have to help! Paimon: B-but…! But what about--? Amber (serious): I know you're worried about your partner, but she looks like she can fend off Mondstadt against the dragon. Right now, these innocent people can't. I need your help.

Paimon seems unsure, looking back up at the sky for Lumine. Amber again asks, but this time, it comes out more as a plea.

Amber: Please…

Paimon then looks at Amber, nodding. Amber runs off, trying to help out innocents. Paimon hesitates, looking up at the sky one last time.

Paimon: …please be okay, Lumine…!

She then flies off in Amber's direction, assisting as best as she can.

Meanwhile, there's this guy... a guy with an eyepatch awtching from afar. He's doing that "cool guy" pose, leaning against the support beam of a building. Congratulations--we've met Kaeya.

Kaeya: So, an Outlander has come to save us from the big, scary dragon. How amusing…

Lisa, who is actually doing work for once, scolds Kaeya as she escorts a woman and her child to safety

Lisa: Kaeya! A little bit of help would be appreciated. Kaeya: Right. Sorry. Got distracted by the light show.  Lisa: Kaeya, not now! Kaeya: Alright, alright. I'm coming. No need to worry so much, Lisa.

While he's busy, though, he still is thinking heavily about that person in the sky... wondering about something. But, oh well, whatever.

After some time passes, Lumine successfully shoos Dvalin away and lands on the ground, where Paimon tearfully hugs Lumine tightly, glad she's okay.

Anyway, then Kaeya comes up

Kaeya (clapping): Well, well, well. You've actually got the power to go up against the dragon... Lumine: ? Kaeya: Are you perhaps a new ally... Kaeya: Or a new storm? Lumine and Paimon (staring): ... Paimon (whispering): Is he really a Knight? Lumine (whispering): No, I think he's a pirate. Kaeya (surprised): Huh. That's. Not the reaction I was expecting.

Anyway, we're introduced to Kaeya and the group heads to the Knights of Favonius, where they meet Jean and Lisa and basically go over how fucked the shit is.

Jean: So that's the situation. Stormterror's power sources must be cut off, and we need your help. I promise, we will help you seek out your brother. Lisa: Mhm. That's right, cuties! Lumine: ... Lumine: Okay so... stop THAT. Lisa: Hm? Lumine: And also, how... many Temples are we dealing with? Kaeya: Three of the Four Temples. Lumine: ... Lumine: I'm sorry, what happened to the fourth? Paimon: is it the rule of threes? Lumine: This sounds like the rule of threes. Amber: What are you guys even saying? Kaeya (snickering): Pffft... finally, my kind of crowd. Amber: No. Stop Do not.

So with that out of the way, Lisa and Kaeya join the party and embark on the quest to the Three Temples--I mean, Three of the Four Temples.

No, Paimon, Lumine, and Kaeya will NOT stop joking about it.

Lumine: But if the fourth temple is off-limits, shouldn't you just call it the three temples? Lisa: Well, you see, it's because-- Paimon: Yeah! If you keep saying it's dangerous but it still exists, then people who would want to visit the Temples would try to find the fourth anyway! Because completionism! Kaeya: Ah, see, I brought up that same point as well, but the Acting Grandmaster said otherwise. Amber: Listen, we're visiting THREE TEMPLES. Okay? Just three! No more! Paimon: No four. Lumine: What a bore. Kaeya: Such a chore. Amber: And no rhyming games! Kaeya: What a... Paimon, Lumine, and Kaeya: Shame? Lisa (sighs): A long errand this will be, won't it, Amber? Amber: You're telling me...

I'm not going to go over the stupid Temples, okay? Like. Literally no one remembers them. I'm skipping them. Shush. This is my fic, I do what I want.

Most you'll get is tidbits of what happens in each one.

First up we have the Temple of the Falcon, where we see Amber in action. And, um...

Amber: Oh no, Hilichurls! Lisa: Quickly, we must defeat them! Kaeya: Right. Amber: Oh, there's explosive barrels over there! Maybe if I throw Baron Bunny over-- Lumine: Oh, hey! Is that you, little guy? Friendly Hilichurl (from before): Tomo! Kaeya, Lisa, and Amber: ... All three: What? Lumine: Sorry for intruding. Were you guys stationed here too? Friendly Hilichurl: Dada. Dala si? Lumine: Oh, some friends of mine. Hey, listen, do you know where some sort of... draconic power is? Friendly Hilichurl: Da! Zido, zido! Paimon: Wow, Lumine, your Hilichurlian is really helpful! Lumine: I know, right? Kinda glad about that. Kaeya: ... Kaeya: S... she speaks... Amber: Yup. Lisa: And she negotiated with... Amber: Mhm. Kaeya: ... Kaeya: That's... a new one...

--yeah, so I lied. Remember how Lumine communicated with the Hilichurls earlier? Yeah, it makes things significantly easier for them.

They take out a Dragon's Breath, move onto the next Temple. Here, Lumine learns about Visions... and the group also tries to avoid every single sexual innuendo Lisa makes.

Lisa: So as you can see, when enemies are Wet, I can easily handle them via chain lightning, as they become electro-charged. Lumine: ... Paimon: ... Lia: The electrical discharge caused by friction is only a little less shocking than love at first sight. Lumine, covering Paimon's ears: Paimon, you're too young to hear this. Paimon, covering her eyes: Paimon is too Paimon to see this. Kaeya: Lisa, maybe cut down on the adult erotica you read? Amber: KAEYA! Kaeya, covering Lumine's ears: What? Just sayin'. Not in front of the children. Lumine: I AM 5'2", THAT IS LIKE AVERAGE HEIGHT FOR A FEMALE ADULT! Kaeya: Sure, kiddo. Lumine, squirming: HANDS OFF, HANDS OFF--!

Lisa also gets a new weapon here, but that's neither really here or there. I'm not gonna mention much about weapons, guys, unless the character is like super important.

Anyway, two out of the four three temples left! Kaeya's turn! And. Um. Well.

Kaeya: Luckily, the Hilichurls weren't so much as a problem this time... Kaeya, turning to Lumine, swinging around his new sword he just got cuz he wants to look like a badass: So. You said they were stationed here? Lumine: Yup. That's what they told me. They typically want to be as far out from humans or human-traveled locations as much as possible so they can live peacefully, but they only ever approach if stationed there. Kaeya: Interesting... Then perhaps. Kaeya, to the Hydro Abyss Mage behind him: YOU were behind this! Hydro Abyss Mage: Gohus, Chiso Vo--

And then a gigantic ass flaming claymore bursts in, hitting the Hydro Abyss Mage.

Hydro Abyss Mage: GAH-- Kaeya: ..well, well, look who it is. Diluc: Knights of Favonius. Always so inefficient. Kaeya: Agree to disagree. But, since you got involved, this should be more interesti-- Amber: KAEYA, DILUC, I GET THAT YOU'RE BICKERING, BUT THE THING ISN'T GONE! Kaeya and Diluc: ?! Lisa, busy electrocuting it: Master Diluc, may we remind you the basics of elemental resonation and why fire doesn't work effectively on water? Diluc: ... Kaeya: ...

Kaeya proceeds to freeze the Hydro Abyss Mage.

Diluc: ... Kaeya: So. 'Inefficient', you said? Diluc: ...tch.

Diluc leaves, while Lumine and Paimon just stare.

Lumine: ...was he... trying to be cool? Paimon: That was... the worst first imperssion ever. Kaeya: Pfft. Yup. Knew I liked you two.

So anyhow and anyway, the group returns to Mondstadt and updates Jean on everything, with Lumine and Paimon learning the Fourth Temple was actually Dvalin's. Insert an "ooooooh" here.

Well, actually, before they update Jean, they see her arguing with Fatui diplomats on things.

Jean: That was the Fatui... from Snezhnaya. Lumine: Actually, it's pronounced "Fah-twee". Jean: ...what? Lumine: You're pronouncing it like pah-tooey, like when someone expectorates. Lumine: Anyway, continue. Jean: Oh... kay...? Paimon: Wait, so the Fatui wanted to kill Stormterror? Kaeya: To be fair, the Cryo Archon and the Fatui have always coveted the other Archons' powers... Lumine: Okay, but why? Kaeya: Beats me. Paimon: Aren't you a Knight? Shouldn't you know more about politics? Kaeya: Aren't you the "number one traveling companion"? Shouldn't YOU know more about Teyvat in general? Paimon: D'oh...

Lisa and Jean then take a look at the red crystal, amused by it. They claim that it's impure, and surprising that Lumine isn't affected by it. Then, she is honored with the title.

Jean: Now then, Traveler... The Knights of Favonius have another favor to ask of you. Lumine: You can just call me Lumine... no need to call me Trave-- Jean: Please accept the title of Honorary Knight... and the gratitude of the Acting Grand Master! Lumine: Aaaaand a new title. Awesome. Paimon: Wow, look at that, Lumine! The Honorary Knight of Favonius! Kaeya: And now you're subject to being called Honorary Knight to the end of your days. Lumine: Haha, very funny.

The group disperses, going their seperate ways, only for Lumine and Paimon to ask for lodging! W-well, except, um...

Paimon: Paimon can't BELIEVE it! The Fatui took ALL THE ROOM IN THE GOETHE HOTEL?! Lumine: And to think it's the only hotel in Mondstadt... for the supposed capital of the place, you'd think there'd be more. Paimon: Urgh... those Fatui! And Paimon could've ordered food service. Lumine: Ah, so YOUR main complaint was food service. Paimon: W-well, who are we supposed to call here? Captain Eyepatch?! Lumine: Or Noelle. Apparently she's like the maid here? Paimon: Yeah, but... Paimon would feel bad asking her for room service... Lumine: (laughs) Paimon: So, Amber said that our room was... this one, right?

Lumine and Paimon arrive at their temporary lodging--the Knights of Favonius HQ. Well, specifically, the area where the Knights who live in the HQ stay. Thankfully, there were open spaces due to a large majority of the soldiers being gone with the actual Grandmaster of the Knights.

When Paimon and Lumine open the room, they find it's... pretty quaint. They get a decent view, a comfy bed. Though, there is a LOT of Favonius paraphernalia--from the books, to the carpet. Even the curtains and...

Lumine: Huh. Didn't know that had Favonius-branded napkins. Paimon: And lamps. Lumine: ...interesting...

Lumine and Paimon take the chance to settle down, sitting back and getting comfy.

Paimon: Lumine, you sure are getting comfortable with the Teyvatan language, though! Those two months of practicing were worth it, weren't they? Lumine: I also had to relearn how to walk again... you know, they never talk about how over five hundred years of sleeping can seriously affect your ability to move. Paimon: Mhm! But it was all worth it in the end!

As Lumine and Paimon lie down on their bed, Lumine looks up at the ceiling. It's getting dark out... they've been busy all day. Talk about an action-packed first day properly interacting with Teyvatan locals.

Lumine: ...it's only been a day, huh? Paimon: ... Paimon: Lumine? Lumine: Hm? Paimon: Are you... sad?

Paimon turns around, looking up at Lumine. She's worried.

Paimon: Do you think the Anemo Archon is the one that took your brother? Lumine: ...no. Far from it. If the statue is anything like the god that took him from me? Definitely not her. Paimon: Do you think he'd at least know her? Lumine: Well... I guess we could ask. Paimon: ...Paimon's sorry. Lumine: Hm? For what?

Paimon grows quiet, then whimpers.

Paimon: ...if Paimon could remember, Paimon would tell you, but...

When Lumine found Paimon, Paimon commented that there were things she did and didn't remember.

Lumine: Well, you seemed to remember some things as we made our way here, right? Paimon: Right, but... it only happened when Paimon saw them. It was like Paimon couldn't remember until she had to remember. Lumine: ...then, when the time comes, you'll remember. I know it. Paimon: ...mn. Paimon hopes so.

Paimon lets out a big yawn, and Lumine smiles gently. For the past two months, it's just been her and Paimon against the world. They've practically become inseperable. Attached to the hip.

Lumine: Tired? Paimon: Mn... Lumine: Go to sleep then, Paimon. It's been a long day.

Lumine stands up, gently tucking Paimon into bed. However, Paimon calls out to Lumine.

Paimon: Lumine, what about you? Aren't you sleepy? Lumine: I'll head to bed in a bit. Just want to do some reading practice before anything.

Lumine stands up, grabbing some books from the shelves. With a stack of them in her arms, she makes her way to the bed, flipping through each of them vigorously.

Clues about her brother's whereabouts. Myths about that Unknown God. An unknown location. She'd accept anything at this point.

Book after book, page after page... the light in the room stayed on throughout the night. It was as if hours passed. And yet, nothing.

No mentions of a blond-haired Traveler in search of his sister. No Unknown Gods with flowing white hair that claimed to be the Sustainer of Heavenly Principles. It was all simply tales of Mondstadt, or fairy tales about some oddities.

Lumine's eyes began to droop... she was getting sleepier by the moment. Until finally, the weary girl dozed off.

The first night without her brother. How sad... how unfortunate.

As Lumine dozes off to sleep, she hears a voice resounding... and suddenly, her surroundings change, and she begins to dream.

Once upon a time, there was a one-eyed peacock...

"He came from a long line of creatures that lived in a forest made by their own kind. They despised the gods that lived up above them in the sky, and wished to rule themselves. For they were the superior. That was their belief."

"But the gods were angered by these creatures. How dare they overstep such boundaries set in place? How dare these creatures be greedy and take life into their own hands? In anger, the gods set the creature-made forest ablaze."

"It was Hell on earth. Many cried, many screamed. Beings of shadow emerged from the depths, consuming everyone in it's wake... it was a disaster. No... it was a Cataclysm."

"Despite it being 500 years ago, the one-eyed peacock shared his ancestor's legacy. For his bloodline had been cursed by the gods. What that curse was, he would never say. But all he knew was this: his father had sent him to hide in a beautiful kingdom of dandelions, in hopes that one day, it would perish."

"The peacock, in truth, held a dark secret. His beautiful feathers were nothing but shards of ice. In truth, his true body was afflicted, tainted by his ancestors. And he had to bear that curse for as long as he lived."

"The peacock made his way into the hearts of the Dandelion Kingdom, and soon, he was taken in by an owl and his owlet. The young peacock and owlet grew close, standing side by side, learning and growing together."

"For once, the peacock wondered, 'Is this okay?'. He asked himself, 'could I live like this? Could I spend my days in this Kingdom of Dandelions?' He was comfortable, he was happy... perhaps, he thought, this could be his new home. Perhaps his curse didn't need to be his truth."

"...but the Gods forbade it."

"These Gods weren't the same ones who cursed the peacock's bloodline, not the ones who lived in the clouds. No, they were the ones who determined everyone's fate. The Gods, in their anger, were unsatisfied with the peacock's conclusion."

"You are cursed forevermore. It is your destiny."

"To prove their point, the Gods sent down a 'curse' that tore apart the owl that took the peacock in. Ripping him apart, limb from limb, pucking his feathers until nothing was left, but a mere husk. By the time that the peacock and owlet arrived, it was too late... the owl was no longer himself."

"The owlet watched in horror, his father growing mad and losing himself. No matter what the owlet did, he could only do one last thing:"

"The peacock watched as the owlet cried, curling up against his father's corpse, his beak and talons stained with blood. It had to be him that ended his father's life."

"This was the Gods answer... the peacock understood. There was no father here, no family here. The only thing left was his curse."

"For the first time, the peacock shed his icy feathers, revealing to the blood-stained owlet the truth. In tears, the owlet grew furious--how could the peacock have lied to him? The peacock, this entire time... was he glad that his father died?"

"The owlet clawed at the peacock, and in return, the peacock fought back. It was no longer a friendly duel between brothers. It was a falling out. They fought, and fought, and fought. But what the owlet didn't see were the peacock's tears."

"Ever since that day, the peacock understood. He must never shed his feathers, for he must keep the truth hidden within. The Gods have willed it so. It is, after all, his destiny, to lie."

"He cannot live a happy life in the Dandelion Kingdom. He cannot trust anyone, not even himself."

"And so, the peacock accepted his destiny, doing as the Gods instructed, until his body froze him to the bone, and he took his final breath, cold. Alone. Just as he had been since the beginning."

Lumine immediately bolted up out of bed, her head pounding, ears ringing. What was that dream...? No, really, what WAS that dream?

She looked at Paimon, who was sleeping soundly next to her. A dream about a peacock, an owlet, a dead owl... it was all so vivid, so terrifying, so...

...sad.

Lumine sat up in bed, taking in everything. What sort of dream was that? It was bizarre.

As she felt around for the lamp, her hand rested on a small book. A book she most likely was about to read before falling asleep.

The girl looked outside. Still dark out. Not only that, but her head still ached from such an odd dream--or would it be more appropriate to call it a nightmare?

Either way, she resolved to read the book and find a glass of water. Perhaps that would make it easier on her.

Lumine carefully crept out of the room, ensuring Paimon was fast asleep, before wandering the HQ. It was eerily dead silent in the middle of the night.

She looked around for the kitchen, trying not to make a sound, until at last she found the tap. Setting her book aside and grabbing a glass, she poured herself a drink--

???: "Teyvatan History 101", eh? Lumine: AH!

Nearly spilling her water, Lumine panicked, turning around. Standing there, carrying a lamp, was none other than Kaeya Alberich, dressed down into something she could only assume was his nightwear.

Kaeya: Snooping around in the middle of the night, little miss? Lumine: You scared the heck out of me...! Jeez...! Kaeya: Haha, sorry. Couldn't help myself.

As Kaeya laughed, Lumine held her hand up to her forehead before drinking her glass. Her brows were furrowed, and she seemed to be shaking a bit. At that, Kaeya decided to inquire.

Kaeya: ...hey. Couldn't sleep?

Lumine turned, then looked up at Kaeya.

Kaeya: What? Friend can't ask a friend how she's doing? Lumine: ...we're friends? Kaeya: I'm hurt, Miss Honorary Knight... are you suggesting we aren't?

Lumine laughs at that, before leaning against the counter, sipping her water. Kaeya joins her, leaning against the counter as well. The two are side by side in the quiet of the night.

Lumine: I, uh... yeah. Had a nightmare. Kaeya: Oh? Do tell. Lumine: I just... don't know how to make heads or tails of it? Kaeya: Surprise me. Not only am I devilishly good-looking, but I'm also an expert at interpreting dreams. Lumine: Pfft, that's a lie. Kaeya: You won't know until you try.

The two laugh a bit, until the mood seems to shift in a more... somber way.

Lumine: I, um... I guess I should start by saying I typically don't have nightmares. Kaeya: No? Lumine: Yeah... Aether and I always made sure that we were both at least in the same vicinity when we fell asleep so, I... guess he was like my nightmare repellent. It's... been happening for the past few months. Kaeya: ... Kaeya: I see.

There's a silence in the air, only for Kaeya to try and continue the conversation.

Kaeya: So. You and your brother were close? Lumine: Yeah. Well, are... Lumine: ...hopefully that's the right tense. Kaeya: Hey. I'm sure he's out there. Just gotta look for him is all. I'm sure he's trying to find you too, right? Lumine, quietly: Yeah. I... I hope so too.

Lumine looks into the water in her glass, before she begins to talk about her dream.

Lumine: ...the dream I had this time though was different from most of the other nightmares I've had. Kaeya: Hm? Like what? Lumine: In the past, it was... always about Aether leaving me. Leaving me behind, not letting me follow him, and in the end, I'd end up all alone in a vast, empty void. Lumine: But this one was... about a one-eyed peacock.

When that was mentioned, Kaeya's eye widened.

Kaeya: ...one-eyed... peacock? Lumine: Mhm. Again, a really weird dream, but-- Kaeya: What happened to it? Lumine: Huh? Kaeya: ...t... the peacock, I mean. Did... something happen?

Kaeya hastily tried to correct himself. Lumine couldn't tell if it was the dim lighting or not, but his eye seemed to dart around, refusing to make eye contact with her. Despite this, she continued.

Lumine: Yeah, um... so, the peacock was cursed by the Gods. Something about his bloodline being cursed by defying the creatures that lived in the clouds? It's really confusing. Kaeya: And then? Lumine: Well...

Lumine recounted the story, trying to piece together what she could recall.

Lumine: ...he was accepted into the Dandelion Kingdom. Well, more like sent to infiltrate it by his father to see it's downfall or... something. And he was adopted by an owl and his son. Kaeya: ...

Kaeya grew unexpectedly quiet at this. It was almost uncharacteristic for him.

Lumine: ...Kaeya? Kaeya: Continue.

When he realized how off he sounded, he corrected himself.

Kaeya: Sorry, sorry. I, um... tired. Lumine: O-okay... Lumine: ...well, as time passed, the peacock came to love it in the Dandelion Kingdom, but he questioned if it was alright to stay there or if he had to do what he was "destined" to do. Then, when he hesitated, the Gods got angry. The owl that took care of the peacock went made and his owlet had to be the one to kill him. And the peacock... just watched. Like he was being told "you have to do what you were destined to do now, there is no second option".

Kaeya's hands were shaking, though Lumine couldn't notice it. As if he was reliving a bad memory. A bad dream.

Lumine: ...the peacock decided to try and tell the owlet. I guess he felt bad and at least wanted to put all cards on the table. Shed his feathers, showed the truth and... they fought. And the peacock just... lied for the rest of his life, not questioning his destiny. Kaeya: ...what... happened at the end of the dream? Was... that all?

Lumine grew quiet, before whispering. Ah, so this is why he reacted this way...

Lumine: ...the peacock froze to death.

Kaeya's face darkened. It was like he was hoping for a happier ending deep down, but he knew that it wouldn't end that way.

A few seconds pass, before Lumine draws a conclusion.

Lumine: I don't... want to make assumptions but, I'm guessing from your reaction that... Kaeya: ...that the peacock was me as a kid?

Lumine looked up at Kaeya, who avoided her eyes.

Kaeya: Yeah. From a kid to my teens. Lumine: Then... that owlet was-- Kaeya: The owl was a man named Crepus Ragvindr. And the owlet? His son... Diluc Ragvindr. Lumine: The one who appeared at the Temple of the Wolf? Kaeya: That's right. He and I were close once. But, like you said. I wavered. Instead of being next to him when he had to kill his dad, end Crepus' misery, I just. Watched. Accepted that this was my fate as a descendant of Khaenri'ah.

At that, Lumine became curious.

Lumine: ...Khaenri'ah? Kaeya: An ancient nation made by humans. All Teyvatan nations have been established and run by the Archons, except for Khaenri'ah. Celestia, the big guys up above, hated that. They... wiped out everything. Lumine: I... I-I'm sorry, I-- Kaeya: Don't be. It was centuries ago. Nothing to do with me. Kaeya: Or... well, you know.

Yet another silence between them, only for Kaeya to suddenly chuckle sadly.

Kaeya: Haaah, why... why am I telling you this? Makes no sense. Lumine: Hm? Kaeya: I mean... think about it. We just met today, and suddenly, I'm telling you a secret that I only told one other person, and said person now hates me. I... I must've gone mad.

Kaeya ran his fingers through his hair, continuing to smile sadly.

Kaeya: Ah... that's fine. Just one more person to despise m-- Lumine: I don't despise you.

Kaeya froze in his place. Did... his ears decieve him?

He turned to Lumine, in shock.

Kaeya: What... did you just... Lumine: Why would I hate you for the sins of your father?

The man continued to stare at Lumine, who seemed completely serious. She said it so... matter-of-factly. Was something wrong in her head?

Surely. Surely something was wrong with her. After all, he's a sleeper agent, meant to wait there and watch as Mondstandt burned. So why? Why was she...?

Lumine: If anything, I hate the Gods. Kaeya: ...the... the Gods? Lumine: Mhm. The ones that said that you have to follow your destiny. It's obvious you love Mondstandt, right?

"Obvious"? Please, what does this girl know? Only a day and she's making assumptions on his character.

How could he love Mondstadt when he was to be there someday and watch it all crumble? It was his destiny, his God-given destiny. Written in the stars, unchangeable.

Kaeya: I... hah. I live here, obviously, so-- Lumine: But you love it's people. Kaeya: ... Lumine: I don't know why I got that dream, or why it was so close to your truth. But... what I do know is that every time I saw that peacock, I didn't feel angry. I felt... sad. Lumine: His dad abandoned him to make him fulfill revenge for something that he wasn't involved in, he found a family that was immediately ripped away because he wasn't following his destiny, and he just decides that he has to lie all the time until the day he ends up dying. Lumine: That's such a lonely existence... I couldn't hate a poor creature like that. Lumine: I couldn't hate you like that.

She looks up at Kaeya innocently. Something within Kaeya stirs--it's like she's staring straight into his soul, dissecting everything about him. As she continues to speak, he can't deny her. Like she speaks the truth.

Lumine: If that dream is your reality, then I can't be mad at you. Instead, I'd just be sad. Sad that you wanted to try and be your own person but instead felt like you had to live up to what someone in your past did. That's all, really. Lumine: ...in a way, the Gods never really gave you a chance to grieve at all. Because 'destiny' was more important than you were to them. Lumine: At least, that's just what I'm th--

As Lumine looks up, a strange sight is before her. Kaeya is paralyzed, staring at the ground... and for a moment, she swears she could see something trailing down his cheeks.

A teardrop. A small, tiny teardrop.

Kaeya had lost everything. He didn't want to admit that, but he did. There was nothing for him.

His birth father left him to carry his ancestors' burden. His foster father died in front of his eyes. His best friend, brother, despised him. All the while, he lost the ability to feel like "himself".

He's a liar. A hollow, empty liar.

And instead of falling for his bluff, Lumine, this random stranger from who knows where, shattered that bluff on day one.

Impressive. Scarily impressive. To the point that Kaeya actually felt terrified.

Kaeya: ...hah. Wow. Are... a-are you a therapist? You really should try getting into that. You're, um. You're a very good listene--

Immediately, Lumine sets down her water and hugs Kaeya tightly. She's a lot shorter than him, so her head barely reaches up to his chest, but... for some reason, it's not cold. It's... warm.

Is this a hug?

What kind of hug is it?

A hug of passion and desire?

No. No, Kaeya can tell it isn't... it's too different from that.

A genuine hug from someone that's worried?

...there's no way it could be that, could it?

Lumine: ...you can grieve now. Kaeya: ... Lumine: ...it's long overdue by now, isn't it? I won't get mad at you, so... Lumine: ...I lost something too. We can both grieve together.

...this girl was something else. That much, Kaeya understood.

His hands twitched, not knowing what to do, only to loosely reciprocate the hug. Suddenly, his head moved lower, resting atop hers...

...and tears began to flow.

He choked it back as best he could--oh, how hard he tried. He clenched his teeth, his fists tightening, but he couldn't.

Was this his true feelings? He didn't know. He thought he repressed it a long, long time ago.

But for some reason, Lumine simply saying that she would grieve with him... felt comforting.

Kaeya: ...haha. F-fuck... this is... the worst first impression I've ever made on someone. Lumine, also tearing up: Don't worry. I won't tell. It'll be our little secret.

The two continue to hug, tears flowing. Yet, it felt... freeing. Rejuvenating.

As he wept, as his soul began to thaw, Kaeya asked one question to Lumine. As if seeking this answer his entire life.

Kaeya: Hey, kid? Lumine: Hm? Kaeya: If... if I said I don't want to see Mondstadt suffer... is that okay?

When she heard that question, Lumine squeezed him tighter, nodding.

Lumine: Yes. It has always been okay since the very start.

Someone had listened to him. Someone had listened to his truth... and, for once, someone told him... it was all okay.

Was that all he wished for? A gentle voice to tell him he could do as he wished, feel as he wished?

Was all he wanted an affirmation that... perhaps he could have happiness?

Maybe. Maybe that was all he wanted ever since he was abandoned those years ago. Ever since he was a kid.

And now, finally, someone found him trapped in the ice and helped him break free.

It was almost as if he was reborn anew...

As their tears dried, Kaeya and Lumine took the time to get some fresh air outside of the headquarters. They began to chat over mundane things to ease themselves of the pain. Perhaps it was the stars in the sky, or maybe about some passing cat. Whatever it was, they were at peace.

Then, Kaeya brought up a question.

Kaeya: So. You said you were grieving too. You... were talking about your brother, right? Lumine: Mn. I... don't feel the same without him, so. Kaeya: Right, right. Gotcha.

For a few seconds, there was yet another silence. But then, Kaeya began to speak once more.

Kaeya: ...Diluc was like my brother too. Lumine: Really? Kaeya: Yup. My best friend, my brother-in-arms... but I, um... Kaeya, looking down: I guess I just didn't get the chance to grieve that fact that we couldn't go back to that after he found out the truth. Lumine: ...hey, I'm sure that when the time comes, you could potentially go back to that. Right? Kaeya: ... Kaeya: Pfft. Optimistic, aren't you? Lumine: Haha, I try.

The two chuckle, before looking up at the stars in the night sky. The way they twinkle, the way the clouds roll through the dark indigo hue...

Kaeya: ...what if we try and fill the brother-shaped gap we both have? Lumine: Hm?

Lumine looks up, interested at Kaeya's query. Noticing her puzzled look, he laughs and reiterates.

Kaeya: I mean... you're missing a brother. I'm also just realizing I'm missing a brother. Why don't we both miss a brother together? A pair of siblings without their sibling.

The girl stares at him, then looks down, humming to herself with a smile on her face.

Lumine: So... it's like you'd be my brother and I'd be your sister? Kaeya: Well, if you'll have me. Just know though that, since you know the truth now, I'm not going to go easy on you. Lumine: Haha, wouldn't dream of it.

Right as she says that, she then gets another idea. Her voice has a hint of sincerity to it, a soft look in her eyes.

Lumine: And if you ever go back on your word about "wanting to keep Mondstadt safe", I'll be there personally to punch you back to reality.

Kaeya's stunned at this. To think, instead of being hated, instead, she says she'd be there personally to ensure it wouldn't happen... what an interesting girl.

His lips curl into a smile, and he holds out his hand in front of Lumine.

Kaeya: Sounds like a deal then, little miss Honorary Knight.

Lumine stares at the hand, then up at Kaeya, only to return the smile, firmly shaking his hand.

Lumine: It's my pleasure, Captain Eyepatch. Kaeya: Captain Eyepatch? Lumine: It's the ugly nickname Paimon gave you. Kaeya: Hm... Captain Eyepatch. Hey, maybe I should make that my new working title now that I have no cavalry to captain. Lumine: That... (laughs) that was terrible. Kaeya: You laughed. Lumine: I laughed because it was bad. Kaeya: Aww, come on. Admit it. Lumine: Hahaha!

Their laughter echoed throughout the night. The stars in the night sky shone brightly, the moon watching over the City of Mondstadt. That day, an unbreakable bond was forged.

...and that day, the wheels of fate began to turn.

Kaeya has now joined Lumine's team.

================

jesus christ holy shit holy fuck we're done so some lil notes here before we end it off. yes, this is how the fic is gonna look. im so sorry but also i like character dialogue so much. the way they interact helps them grow more naturally, and the way they talk gives you insight as to how theyre changing and how they act and just. AGH. love dialogue. hate descriptions. cant do that. yuck. also some non-story-relevant plot points (like the goddamn temples like srsly no one remembers those) will be skipped in the future, cuz fetch quests are both tedious to play and tedious to write. only major story events will be recorded. also no kaeya and lumine are not romantically attracted guys just cuz two people stand next to each other doesnt mean theyll kiss, they are like brother and sister. theyre besties. shush. lumines husband will show up to save his girlie in liyue okay this was genuinely a lot more fun than i thought it would be but also this was rlly fucking long im so fucking sorry anyway KLSDJHAFKLJHKL thats all i got for u

&lt;prev> <masterlist> <next>

[candycryptids]

As someone who plays SMN for the ease of access its given me, i REALLY wish we'd get an upgrade for it. I can't just leave it off hotbar because its useful in lower level dungeons but it takes up pace in newer content...

Like I know SMN is not a healing class, we get SCH for that, but if we have to keep the one heal we get at lest make it semi useful?

when i go DNC at least curing waltz and Improvisation come in handy, even if they're not ear as good s what healers do, and we have seen how nus RDM is

i'm not asking for much, just for that one heal to do something useful? but like im also not a dev or a healer main u know?

No but really !!!! It’s nuts, it doesn’t even heal chip damage in higher content but you can’t get rid of it from your bar bc Twelve Forbid you need it when you run tamtara again for leveling lmfao.

And you’re so right abt Smn being really? Accessible. It’s not a fussy or overly complicated class that needs a ton of reach in your keyboard if you put your bars together right (I am looking at you BLM and RPR my hands fucking hurt and I can’t figure out a better bar setup without confusing other classes LOL)

Maybe they just don’t mean for phys to be useful on SMN past a certain point so it’s all very By Design but. God damn can it bite when red mage is raising and healer and blowing enemies up LOL. (I looooove dancer, when I figured out how to use Improvisation my life improved greatly. Turns out you should Read Things when you get them 🤡)

[glowingtitle]

they deserve it.....,,, the greatest, the memeiESt meme....

[jakesimfromstatefarm]

notoriously yours | jay park

✰ summary: jay park is a rich kid. it’s safe to say he has everything every broke college student on his campus could dream of and more. but the one thing he doesn’t have, which money definitely can’t buy, is a girlfriend. and his friends won’t see of it. literally.

so what happens when his friends bet him to date someone for more than three months? what happens when jay decides that fake-dating someone would be easier than actual dating (because god forbid Jay–the campus’ notoriously known fuckboy–decides to commit to something once in his life)?

and what happens when that someone is you, his childhood best friend he hasn’t spoken to in years..who has absolutely no interest in being in his life anymore?

✰ pairing: jay park x y/n [ft. members of enha]

✰ genre: fluff, comedy, angst | fakedating!au, college!au, childhoodbestfriends!au, (kinda) e2l!au

✰ warnings: cursing, nothing suggestive but jay's a fuckboy so slightly suggestive themes, mentions of parental neglect/leaving, it's hella long (and i thought my last fic was long)

✰ wc: 14.7k (how did i get it this long oh lord)

✰ author's note: picture creds go to original owners/editors! peep that edit of jay that lowkey inspired this entire fic 👀also this took me so, so long bc i lost motivation half way thru and bc college is a thing,,,so i honestly don't know how to feel abt it so pls bare with me :')))) ALSO the dividers are weird bc idk how to add more than 10 pics for the dividers so pls excuse those ٩(× ×)۶i hope u guys enjoy!! <333

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Jay Park is a rich kid.

Jay Park has enough to buy every textbook he needs for his courses without having to look up the free versions online. Jay Park has enough to bribe his professors to let him pass every class with a perfect 4.0 GPA (but because the boy has morals, he doesn't). Jay Park has enough to afford a car to drive to his furthest class from his dorm building instead of walk or bike like every other college student, meaning he also has enough to afford a parking spot on campus (those things aren't cheap!).

Jay Park walks around your school's campus like he owns the place (and considering the amount of money his family has donated to the school, he practically does), looking like he just walked out of your local coffee shop's newest fashion magazine. His blonde hair is never seen untouched, his attire usually consisting of an undoubtedly high-end all-black fit, accessorized with multiple earrings and rings that probably cost more than all the overpriced textbooks you had to rent out this semester. It's safe to say that everyone knows Jay Park.

Bottom line is, Jay Park has everything.

Well, his friends beg to differ.

In their eyes, Jay Park has everything but a simple factor in the equation of love (or whatever love is to the minds of a couple of 19 year olds): commitment.

So yes, it's safe to say that everyone knows Jay Park. Because everyone knows he's the campus' rich fuckboy. (What's a college fanfic campus without one anyways?)

Jay doesn't go unreminded of this by his friends, to the boy's annoyance.

Jay is aware of this on a Sunday afternoon, in his dorm building's first floor lounge, where he and his said friends are having a study session.

They're doing anything but studying.

In fact, no one has any books out or anything. Not a single laptop in site.

"You don't think it's the slightly bit concerning?" Jake's words are muffled as he continues munching on the fried chicken that he spent majority of this study session debating if he should have it delivered through UberEats or not.

"I really don't, no," Jay shrugs as he continues mindlessly scrolling through his Instagram feed. They're having the same argument conversation that they've revisited multiple times over the course of their friendship, one that Jay has been lectured on too many times for his own good. He thinks his friends could become his new parents if they really tried.

"Look at it this way, okay. You're about to graduate college in a couple of years, into the big world. Like the actual, adult world. And that means you'll have to settle down. Which you can't do when you. have. no. commitment!" Jake punctuates each word with a single clap of his hands, desperate to get his point across.

Jay simply rolls his eyes. He looks over to Sunghoon, who's minding his own business, not bothered by the same topic he's heard over and over again. His eyes tell Jay you're on your own, in response to his blonde-haired friend's look of despair.

Jay thinks that maybe he should get new friends. Yes, that's the only solution here.

"My love life," Jay reaches across the table for a drumstick from the greasy tub seated in Jake's lap until Jake swats his hand away, "is none of your business. Also, ouch."

"Uh, it kinda is. Because of you and your reputation around campus, it kinda affects us, your best friends. How do you think we look, hanging out with the guy who's known to ghost every girl in existence after one night with them? No offense to you," Jake deadpans to him. Jay mentally reconsiders the term best friends.

Tough love. Jay tells himself it's tough love.

"Yes, because every girl totally hates Jake Sim, the teacher assistant of a physics class who volunteers at the pet shelter every Sunday and brings their pet golden retriever to campus every two weeks," Jay rolls his eyes at his Australian friend.

Jake sighs. "Okay, then I'm coming from a place of worry for you."

Jay groans. "Again, none of your business!" This doesn't stop Jake. He comes from good intentions, really, but Jay wants nothing more than to stuff the kid's mouth with some of that chicken to shut him up.

"What are you gonna do if one day you meet someone you like, genuinely like, and you screw yourself over because you've never been in an actual relationship before? A real, committed one. Like one that lasts at least three months."

"You don't think I can last three months in a relationship?" Jay questions the boy currently taunting him.

"Honestly? No. What's the longest relationship you've been in?" Jake cocks an eyebrow at his friend across from him.

One month and two weeks. But Jay's smart enough to not say that out loud.

"I can so last over three months," Jay mutters more to himself than Jake.

Jake laughs at that, pausing to take another bite of the drumstick in his hand. "Jay, I am willing to actually bet you. Bet that you wouldn't be able to." He leans back on the couch, the ball now in Jay's court.

Jay freezes, looking up from his phone, narrowing his eyes at Jake.

"Forget it, Jake. He's not gonna agree even if you offered him money," Sunghoon finally perches from beside him. Well he's not wrong. It's not like Jay is exactly in need of more money, per say.

"What kind of bet are we talking here?"

Sunghoon's right. Jay doesn't need the money, but he does hate being wrong. Even if it's over something as stupid as this matter.

Caught off guard by the blonde's answer, Jake blinks blankly at him and takes a second to think.

"Hmm..what about...what about if you can date someone for at least three months, and I mean an actual, committed relationship, then I'll do all of your physics homework next semester."

Jay's eyes sparkle at that. If there's anything he despises more than commitment, it's physics.

"And if I win, you have to buy all of my textbooks," Jake sits back from the edge of his seat with a smirk lying on his face.

Jay pauses to think about it. I mean, what does he have to lose? A couple hundred dollars over college textbooks? No. Because he just simply won't lose.

And maybe he'll learn what it'll be like to actually be in a committed relationship for once. Maybe he'll finally learn what it's like to actually devote yourself to someone, open up to them. He shivers at the thought. Never mind. He'll warm up to it. Baby steps.

Nonetheless, what could go wrong? Even if he does lose, at least his money would be going somewhere productive––towards his friend's education. Jay was probably gonna use that money on something useless like a blanket that resembles a tortilla (a burrito blanket, he calls it)––something he doesn't necessarily need, but must have, he would argue.

"Fine. Whatever, okay. Deal," he grabs Jake's extended hand in front of him and shakes on it.

Jake's impressively smiling at the boy as Sunghoon lets out a sigh, in disbelief with the two guys he calls his best friends.

Jay concludes that this will be easier than his Introduction to Photography 101 course he took his freshman year. How hard is it to find someone to date the Jay Park? Surely, everyone will be lining up once Jay switches his FaceBook relationship status from "it's complicated" to "single".

Turns out, it's not as easy as his class where all Jay had to do was take pictures of a pretty sunset, slap a VSCO filter on, and call it a day.

He comes to this realization on a Wednesday evening, as he's seated at one of the many study tables lined in the middle of the campus' library, staring down at his phone's dry iMessage app, with his laptop and blank sheets of scratch paper scrambled across the entire table, as an attempt to look half as studious as the other students studying in the facility.

Turns out, being known as the campus' fuckboy who ghosts every girl on campus isn't a good thing when it comes to wanting to find a real relationship.

He comes to this realization after failing to receive a single text back to the many ones he sent out throughout the first half of his day. The ghoster gets ghosted. Oh how the turn tables.

Jay groans dramatically as he tosses his phone on the hard surface of the table, earning himself a harsh shush from the librarian filing books in the aisle beside him.

He sheepishly smiles back as an apology, directing his attention back to his open laptop screen, where his untouched calculus homework stares back at him––his mind preoccupied with the looming threat of Jake's bet. Not that it was threatening in any way, per say, but Jay just hates losing. And from the looks of things, it's safe to say that Jay won't be celebrating any victories anytime soon.

Jay thinks he should just change his identity and just transfer to some boarding school in Switzerland. Yes, that's a much better solution than admitting defeat to Jake.

Jay sighs as he lies his head on the table, figuring he might as well just write the check for Jake's textbooks now. He wonders how he got here in the first place. Not how he got into the bet, and definitely not how he's sitting in the middle of the library, having yet to start his calculus homework due at 11:59PM tonight (he should really start that).

But no, he wonders how he gained the reputation as the campus' playboy. To be fair, his friends (mainly Jake), are constantly reminding him of his notorious habits. But how did they come a habit in the first place?

The idea of being in a relationship is nice, sure, but the commitment that comes with it? The idea of being dependent on someone? It's scary, vulnerable, and one that Jay can't picture for himself.

Maybe some people just aren't meant to be paired. Maybe some people, like Jay, like being independent and are meant to stay that way.

But Jay also likes affection. He likes the fleeting, warm feeling he gets every time he finds himself under someone's sheets. He likes the short-lived comfort he receives from someone else's touch, even though he knows it's going to cease to exist the second he steps out of those bedroom's doors. He just likes affection, simple as that.

That and he's a 19 year old teenage boy with needs, what did you expect?

And so what if he likes the idea of affection minus commitment? Is that so bad? Apparently it is, to people like his friends and the entirety of his school's campus, at least.

At this rate, he might as well pay someone to date him.

Wait. Jay lifts his head off the table's surface in realization.

He might as well pay someone to date him.

There's no harm in that, is there?

He wouldn't have to endure through an endless amount of dates to find someone he clicks with, then continue going on dates with said clicked person, all while trying to develop an actual, serious relationship.

He'll win the bet, get his physics homework done for an entire semester, and some lucky girl out there will be making profit for the small price of hanging out with Jay Park for three months.

And lucky for him, Jay knows the perfect candidate for this scheme.

Simple as that.

Just as long as said perfect candidate says yes.

And as long as Jake and Sunghoon don't find out. Or else Jay might really have to move to Switzerland after all.

You love your friends, you do.

Hana and Heeseung have been there for you when others haven't––they were by your side when you knew no one entering high school, and they were still by your side when you were all graduating said high school. Needless to say, you're eternally grateful for friends like them.

But right now, in this moment––with you seated in the middle of the campus' library, trying to write your essay, as your two friends blabber on and on about the most recent gossip across from you––your two friends could be your villain origin story.

But again, you love your friends, you do. So you don't have the heart to tell them to leave. You've managed to naturally tune out most of the conversation, anyways, for this––your friends coming to hang out while you're trying to study––is no rare occurrence by any means.

"Oh yeah, Jay Park texted me last night."

You hate how your brain's filter suddenly turns off at Hana's words.

You hate how your ears catch the sudden mention of Jay Park's name.

You hate how the thought of Jay Park gets to even occupy a single brain cell of yours.

You hate how you even know who Jay Park is. Well, knew.

Past tense. Because up until eighth grade––when Jay decided to just suddenly pretend you didn't exist––he was attached to you like a koala to a eucalyptus tree.

And if you had asked past Y/N, ideally, Jay would've never left your side. Ideally, he would've never left you to fend for yourself when entering high school. Ideally, he would've stayed your best friend through out all four years of high school and ideally, you would've eventually told him how you really felt about him after growing up with him all your life. And maybe it would've lead to a completely different story. But for the sake of this fic, we don't live in an ideal world.

So yes, if it wasn't for his attendance at the very same university as you, you would've forgotten about the boy who brought you the painful memories of your childhood.

And since the universe clearly doesn't work in your favor, avoiding Jay Park's existence like he's the plague would have to suffice. And it works.

For the most part.

Until some people, bring him up uninvited into your conversation. Like now, for example.

"When was the last time you guys talked anyways?" Heeseung mindlessly asks as he reaches across the table to grab one of the many snacks you usually bring to your study sessions.

"Uh..like a few weeks ago. Give or take. Whenever you threw your house party. Can't say there was much talking involved however," she teasingly says with a giggle and wiggle of her brows.

Heeseung's rolling his eyes as you scoff and chuck a nearby crumpled piece of paper that was once one of your many essay drafts at her.

She bats it away right as it's about to hit her face as she laughs. "Doesn't matter anyways. He ghosted me the next morning, as he does with everyone else. Telling you this now," she extends a finger right at you, "stay away from Jay Park. That kid's just bad news."

You nod in response, mentally telling her she has nothing to worry about.

Been there, done that.

College. Ah yes, the very concept of spending four years of your life imprisoned on a campus where you'll be tearing your hair out from stress and spending all your life's savings just for a laminated sheet of paper with a golden stamp at the end of it all. We live in a society.

Because of said college, and all the weight that comes along with it, you had adapted a strict daily schedule in order to not completely lose your mind. It's a simple schedule really, one of a typical college student who's just trying to get by everyday with as little mental breakdowns as possible.

Wake up, get ready, go to class, go to the library to do your homework, walk all the way across campus to get back to your dorm, shower, then sleep. Oh and eat, of course. And maybe if time permits, be an actual social being and socialize.

It's gotten you this far into the college life without dropping out so, you conclude, you must be doing something right.

Sometimes, if you're feeling nice to yourself, you'll tweak the schedule a bit to fit in some exceptions. Maybe squeeze in a little trip to the bubble tea shop that's on the other side of campus, or maybe get dinner at that one dining hall that you don't usually go to because of the unncessarily long lines (but because they serve ice cream, you go anyways). It doesn't matter what the exception is, you still plan it out to fit into your schedule somehow. Everything is planned out.

Sometimes, however, the universe disagrees with your schedule, to your demise. Such as today, for example.

Because what you didn't expect for today was for a particular blonde-haired boy who you haven't spoken to in almost six years (but who's counting?) to approach your table in the library––a table you were sure no one could find you at, as it was quietly tucked away in the back corner, right next to the Astrophysics shelves. Because who browses the Astrophysics aisle for fun? Actually, maybe Jake Sim would. Anyways.

You definitely didn't anticipate a visit from the boy you've been actively avoiding, so you definitely didn't expect the first words coming out of his mouth when he sees you for the first time in six years to be:

"Fake date me."

You blink up at him.

Yeah, definitely not expected.

But you only let it phase you for a split second, until you feel a slight annoyance beginning to bubble up deep inside of you.

"Wow, hello to you too Jay! It's been what––half a decade? Yeah I've been pretty good, thanks for asking!" The sarcasm is practically dripping off your tongue.

You don't know what runs through Jay's mind, but apparently it isn't common sense––or the ability to read the room. Because next thing you know, he's sliding the chair across from you out from underneath the table and making himself at home.

And he's smiling right at you.

Curse him and his smile.

But no, you're not giving into it.

Not yet, at least.

"What do you want?" You deadpan at him when he makes no sign of making the next move.

"A girlfriend," he deadpans right back at you, as if he was casually telling you what he wanted for dinner. As if you two were close-knit friends that could approach one another without any proper greeting. As if you two had kept your friendship all these years. As if you two even had a role in each other's lives.

"Can't help you there," you scoff, deciding to not even question his lack of manners on top of his uninvited presence.

"Aren't you gonna ask me why?"

"Well gee, seeing that the first few words you decided to say to my face for the first time in forever were a demand, a demand to date you no less, then....no," your monotone voice says as you keep your eyes focused on your laptop screen, not daring to look at the boy across from you.

In the Introduction to Sociology course you took your freshmen year, you had learned of one important term: interactional vandalism. Textbook definition being: "ignoring signals of disinterest in a conversation, leading it to an offense."

Your definition being: "are you oblivious or just plan dumb, read the room!"

This was interactional vandalism, alright. Whether Jay's truly oblivious or just trying to annoy you until your head explodes (it's really the former, but you're convinced it's the latter), he takes your signals of disinterest and tosses it right out of his head to continue the conversation.

"I'm stuck in this stupid bet with Jake--do you remember him? He bet me that I couldn't date someone for more than three months and I figured having someone fake date me would be easier than actually dating someone, right? That's where you come into the equation," he proposes as he leans back in his chair, as if he had just finished a sales pitch to a prospective customer looking to buy a car.

You couldn't believe this. You're 98% sure this has got to be a prank. You're mentally preparing for a camera crew to jump out from in-between the library's aisles any moment now and scream into your ears that you've just been punk'd!

The remaining 2% of you, however, wouldn't put it past the two boys to get themselves in such a situation. The last memory you had of Jay and his friends were pretty much their childish selves back in middle school. And by looking at the current scene unfolding in front of you...it's needless to say they haven't changed much.

"Again, can't help you there. Ask one of the many girlfriends I thought you had." Ouch.

"But Y/N, you've known me all your life--"

"Up until you dropped me a few years ago but sure, let's call it that."

"--and convincing other people is gonna make me look--"

"--desperate? Yeah."

"C'mon, Y/N. What do you have to lose anyways?"

"Uh..my dignity? Pride? Self-respect? Sorry Jay, not happening," you turn your attention back to your unwritten essay in front of you, mentally checking out of this conversation. This would be a good time for that camera crew to jump out now.

"Look, no one else is gonna do it, Y/N." Jay has always been stubborn, you suppose. But so are you.

"Yeah, because you've managed to push every being of the opposite gender away from you. You gave yourself this reputation in the first place," you give it to him straight. It's not like you had a relationship with him to uphold anyways––Jay himself broke that friendship years ago.

Jay hates that you're right.

You're always right. He remembers how he used to always go to you for advice and clarity on the world's biggest problems. Granted, the world's biggest problems to him at the time equated to what he should dress up as for the fifth grade Halloween party, but still. A tough decision, for the mind of a ten-year-old.

You abruptly stop typing and begin putting your laptop and textbooks away as you huff in frustration. There's no point in trying to get your work done now. The longer you stay arguing with Jay, the bigger your headache gets. The longer he continues to occupy any part of your brain, the bigger your headache gets.

Getting up from your seat, packed and ready to slam your head into your pillow, you turn to the blonde one last time.

"Look Jay. We went on our separate ways years ago. If you weren't so notoriously known around campus and my friends would stop talking about you, I would've long forgotten you. I'm sorry you're in this situation, really. If I were you, I'd just tell Jake I can't do it. Or don't, I can't tell you what to do. Just don't get some innocent girl involved in whatever stunt of yours this is."

Jay stares at you, mouth agape, as you find your way out of the library and through the main doors. By the time he comes back to his senses, he realizes how he looks plain stupid––standing in the middle of the library, the look on his face screaming befuddlement, to say the least. Jay quickly makes his way out of the building, in hopes of convincing you one last time.

Jay catches sight of your figure already half-way down the walkway that connects the library to the main quad of your school's campus. Geez, you walk fast.

Not fast enough to outrun Jay's legs, however. If Jay running after you through the middle of campus in order to convince you to fake date him doesn't show how desperate he is to win this bet, I don't know what will.

"Wait, Y/N!"

You groan to yourself before turning to face the boy who can't seem to take a hint and leave you alone. You stare at his out-of-breath state as he heaves up and down from the slight jog he had to endure to get to where you are. If you're humored by him chasing after you, you do a good job of hiding it.

He meets your unimpressed state before stating his final proposition: "I'll pay you. Five hundred dollars."

You nearly stop breathing.

Now this catches your attention––after all, you're but a broke college student who's just trying to survive. And preferably not by feeding yourself instant ramen cups every night.

And so, naturally, you begin rethinking about the opportunity presented in front of you. You narrow your eyes at the boy as you weigh your options.

The first problem being, it's Jay Park––the bane of your very existence. You spent the last few years of your life pretending he didn't exist...for good reason. Not only did he do you dirty when you were merely a couple of 13-year-olds, but you just didn't want to be involved with someone like him. Someone known for his nature, someone who left your own current best friend ghosted. And not that Hana herself would care, for she has called herself the "female Jay Park", but you're sure this would be breaking some rule in the girl code handbook. Plus, if you agree to this, you'd be betraying 13-year-old Y/N, the one who decided to never speak to nor think of Jay Park again––which by now you've failed, but you get the gist.

Second problem being, three months is a long time. Three months is practically the rest of this semester, and did you really want to spend the rest of the semester tied down to the label of being Jay Park's girlfriend? There would have to be some negative connotations that came along with that title, right? No offense to Jay, but being his first girlfriend since, what, high school could make you come off as..naive, for lack of a better term. As if the only person you could settle for was Jay Park. As if you barely had any standards for yourself. Again, no offense to Jay.

Needless to say, if your school's debate club had to argue on why you shouldn't be doing this, you're sure the negating side could win with these two reasons alone.

But before you're rejecting the boy currently standing in front of you one last time, you find yourself mentally listing rebuttals.

First of all, you'd be getting paid. And again, you're merely but a college student living the stereotypical broke college student life––burdened by the costs of tuition, textbooks, and midnight McDonalds runs for when you're out of aforementioned instant ramen cups. Five hundred dollars could provide you with more than enough chicken McNuggets to last you the semester, and maybe some more to treat yourself to an online shopping spree.

Second of all, it's not like you were going to do anything better with your next three months anyways. It's safe to say you were too busy being a diligent student to actually look for anyone to date, per say. And if anything, having a fake boyfriend might actually be helpful in your case. Your mom would be off your ass about how you're still single, for one. And two, your friends (though it's really just Heeseung) would stop trying to hook you up on blind dates with guys that you would choose Jay Park over any day (and that really says something).

Third of all, it's Jay Park. As much as you despise the kid, you still know him. He's not a complete stranger to you, no matter how much you try to deny it. It could be worse, it could be a complete rando asking you to date him. At least you two have some sort of history, which would take care of the typical small talk and getting to know each other bit of this equation. And truth be told, you'd be lying to yourself if you said you weren't a tad bit satisfied by the fact that Jay chose you, of all people, to pull off this stunt with him. You don't know if it's the nostalgia of your childhood memories rushing back to you, but it reminds you of the endless schemes you two used to plan behind your parents' backs all the time. Granted, your childhood schemes––such as the both of you faking sickness so you could skip school together––don't even fall close to being in a fake relationship with one another, but still. It's the thought that counts.

All of those reasons plus, Jay isn't the worst to look at. He may have a spoiled reputation, but at least he has his looks going for him, you'll give him that (you're still secretly wondering when and how did he get his glow up, but don't tell him that).

And so by the guidelines of a college student's logic that states the pros outweigh the cons, you come to the overarching conclusion that maybe, this won't be so awful after all.

"Five hundred?" You ask, just for clarification. Jay's immediately nodding at your words. You continue to ponder on your thoughts as he stares at you hopefully.

The silent atmosphere of your campus heightens the tension so much, you swear you're in one of those overdramatic pausing scenes that occur too many times in k-dramas.

You sigh, then nod.

"Okay," you're internally praying that you won't regret this decision. "I'm in."

The next time you see Jay is at 12:17PM on a Friday afternoon, as you're exiting the doors of the lecture building that's home to your awfully long Capitalism in the Western World class.

You're going down the steps of the building, mentally deciding where and what you're going to treat yourself to for lunch––as the three hour lecture you had just attended drained all the life and energy out of you––when you hear the slight call of your name.

Turning to the source, you're met with a waving Jay, leaning against the passenger's side of his car, parked in front of the lecture hall building you were currently leaving.

Great.

You walk over to where he's casually waiting––he's unaware of all the stares he's attracted from fellow students leaving the same lecture as you. Can you blame them? It's not everyday you see a sleek, black BMW that probably cost more than your tuition pull up in front of your Friday afternoon lecture. It's not everyday you see Jay Park waiting for anyone outside of his said sleek, black BMW that probably cost more than your tuition.

"Hi," you simply let out as you plant yourself in front of him, not sure whether or not to question him why are you here? Surely, he wasn't waiting for you?

"Hi," he smiles down at you. There's a beat of silence. "I was waiting for you."

Bingo.

"Oh. What are you, my chauffeur?" You raise an eyebrow, unimpressed.

"Maybe. I am your boyfriend, after all," he says into the air, loud and clear, as if he wanted people to hear. Well that is the point, you suppose.

But still, all you want to do is smack the smirk right off his face.

Before you have time to put your next question into words, he answers it for you.

"I'm taking you out for lunch," he declares as if you have nothing else planned for the day. Well, to be fair, you didn't have anything else planned for the day. Except for your usual library run. But you figure the library could wait.

"Oh, like on a date?" You raise your eyebrows teasingly at him as you get into the car, Jay holding the door wide open for you. "Is Jay Park treating me to lunch as a date?"

Jay fights the scowl (or is that a smile?) growing on his face as he bends down to meet your eye level from inside the car. "Don't flatter yourself, princess. We've got fake lives to live."

"Call me princess one more time and you won't have a real life to live," you flash him a sarcastic smile and slam the door in his face.

Jay meets his own shocked reflection on the passenger's side window.

Cute.

"When you said you were taking me out to lunch, I expected like...I don't know...the diner on campus. Not whatever this is," you mutter to Jay as the two of you are brought to your table by a waitress at an upscale sushi restaurant, one that is undoubtedly out of your usual budget, but for sure an upgrade from your dining hall's pizza you were planning to have. You should've figured as much, the drive here was a little more than out of the way from campus, and who are you kidding, it's Jay Park you're eating with.

You stare down at your current outfit, which consisted of a hoodie you've owned since your junior year of high school and leggings that you threw on without second thought this morning––because you didn't exactly wake up and decide I'm going to go to a fancy sushi bar for lunch today!

"Why are we here anyways?" You ask him when you're both settled in your seats and the waitress walks away after listing the chef's specials for the day.

"Oh, they have killer dragon rolls here, you have to try it," Jay tells you nonchalantly as his eyes rake the menu in front of him, blocking your view of him.

How dense can one be? Your hand snatches his menu as you stare into his unamused eyes.

"No, Jay. I mean, why are we here? It's not like anyone's around to see us put on a show anyways."

"Oh. I figured," Jay's quick to grab the menu back from out of your hands as he continues, "that we should sit down and establish how exactly we're going to deliver this performance. After all, you're stuck with me for the next three months."

Again, smacking the smirk currently resting on his face would satisfy you beyond relief. Just once.

"If I drop out halfway through, do I still get $250?" You tease, leaning back.

"Ha ha. Funny. No," he narrows his eyes at you from across the table. "It's all or nothing."

You dramatically huff to make a show just for his annoyance.

"Worth a try. But sure, let's solidify this. What's the game plan?" You sit up in your seat, leaning over the table as if the two of you were hosting a secret meeting.

"It's simple really," Jay mirrors your actions, face leaning in close to where yours is hovering over the table. "Just pretend to be deeply in love with me for three months, and try not to actually be charmed by my cunning looks."

If someone gave you five dollars for every time you've already rolled your eyes at him today, you wouldn't even need to be in this deal for the five hundred dollars.

"Wow, smooth. Can I just remind you you're the one paying a girl to be in a fake relationship with you because you're just not competent enough to find an actual girlfriend?" You lean back, arms crossing over your figure.

Jay, unfazed, laughs, tongue briefly hitting the inside of his cheek. "Touché."

Your eyes go back to the menu in front of you as a silence falls over the table. Because you're not a loaded trust fund baby who comes to fancy five-star sushi restaurants for lunch on a daily, you don't recognize half of the entree names on the menu. You spot the dragon roll Jay suggested, but seeing that a basic California roll is less expensive, your natural broke-college-student-instincts figure the California roll shall do.

"Okay, in all seriousness," Jay begins as he puts his menu down. "It's simple really. We'll just go on weekly dates and post cute pictures of each other once in a while and a little after three months, I'll just say it didn't work out. I'll give you the five hundo and boom, we move on with our lives."

It's clear Jay's put some thought into this. Safe to say he's put more effort planning this out than the amount of work he's been putting into his classes. Someone's got their priorities straight.

You're impressed to say the least––you figured Jay would just be the kind to go with the flow and wait for the situation to unfold on its own and maybe blow up into flames. But seeing as he was just as serious about winning this bet as you were with making five hundred dollars, your doubts about this entire situation were slowly withering away.

Don't get it wrong, though, you still despise him. To an extent, at least.

"And don't worry about the dates. I'll pay on your behalf, as the loving, doting boyfriend I am," Jay finishes with a wide, cheesy smile you can't help but return a growing smile back at.

"Well then, as the loving, doting girlfriend I am, I shall gift you coffee, breakfast, all that fun couple stuff, whenever you please. Or maybe unannounced, if I'm feeling nice," you figure you should pitch in as much if he's paying for all your dates. And deep down, you find the idea kinda cute. But don't tell anyone that.

"Wow, look at us. We should become Dispatch's couple of the year already!" Jay exclaims, earning himself a small giggle from you, which pleases him to say the least. He thinks that maybe when this is all over, he'll hopefully make a good friend (well, for the second time) out of it.

And you're thinking that maybe the next three months won't be as bad as you initially had thought.

As the two of you delve deep into a debate about who would be the better significant other to each other, the waitress comes over to take your orders.

And because you're laughing and Jay's brightly smiling at you from across the table, you order the dragon roll.

The second time Jay takes you out––this time he gives you a heads up to get ready––it's at a, once again, high-class steakhouse.

The third time, you insist on the on-campus diner that's popular amongst the student population. Partially because you feel bad for the amount of money he's spent on you (even though he couldn't care less), but mostly because if you have to put on another fancy dress to just eat an overpriced meal that doesn't even fully satisfy your hunger, you might lose your mind.

And by this third time, Jake is aware of this newly blossomed relationship.

"Three dates! I didn't know you had it in you, going on three dates with the same girl!" Jake excitedly exclaims as he jumps into the empty spot on Jay's dorm bed and shoves his phone's screen into Jay's face.

The smaller screen displays Jay's most recent Instagram post: an image of you sitting behind your too-small-to-be-this-expensive-steak and smiling right into Jay's camera––a memory that brings a smile to his face:

~ ~ ~

"C'mon! We said Instagram posts would be a part of the deal! How else can we convince people we're dating?" A pout rests on Jay's face as he stares at you from across the table in the middle of the extravagantly decorated restaurant he picked out for your second date. You remember your eyes bulging out of their own sockets when you saw the "$$$$$" rating Yelp gave the place when you searched it up earlier.

"Okay, okay! One picture," you give in, already slightly annoyed that you were here instead of the comfort of your own bed, where you could be rewatching your favorite Netflix show for the third time. But because you made a deal and because you're desperate for money, you had to follow through––so here you were.

You flash an unconvincing smile to Jay's camera, which doesn't satisfy him, to say the least. "At least pretend you're somewhat enjoying this date," he frowns at you.

You sigh, until a thought crosses your mind and a smile grows on your face. "Only if you get me boba afterwards."

He narrows his eyes at you, but then meets your smile. "Sure, whatever you want. But only because I've been craving some mango milk tea lately."

"You're a fruit milk tea kind of guy? Sorry, but I might have to fake break-up with you," you tease as you take a sip of your overpriced drink to go with your overpriced meal.

Jay scoffs, feigning hurt by placing his hand over his heart. "Ouch. But before you break up with me, let me get this Instagram post in."

"Wow. Your priorities are so straight," you roll your eyes at him, eliciting a cheeky smile from him as he watches you through his held up phone screen.

"3,2,1."

"Hey, I wasn't ready! That was like mid-laugh!" You reach over the table to grab the phone, but not quick enough for him to put his phone back into his pants' pocket.

"Nope, nuh uh," he laughs as you quickly sit back down into your seat, not wanting to cause a scene in an establishment as proper as this one.

"It's fine. It's a good picture, you look cute," he casually lets out, unaware of the blush rising to the surface of your cheeks, thanks to the fact that you were suddenly interested in playing with the left-over food on your plate.

"Jay! Delete it, I'll let you take another one," you whine from your seat, imagining just how bad a candid picture of you could be.

"Ugh, fine. Ever so picky." He playfully rolls his eyes at you as he takes his phone out and opens the camera app as you prepare yourself.

"Okay, how's this?" Jay turns the phone screen to you after he takes a few snaps on his phone.

"I approve," you grin at him as he goes through the pictures himself, unaware of the smile growing on his face.

"Okay now delete the first one," you point your finger at him, narrowing your eyes at him.

"Okay, okay! Bossy," he laughs as he raises in hands in surrender.

When Jay gets home that night, he recovers the image from his Recently Deleted folder, telling himself it's for the sake of the memory.

Obviously.

~ ~ ~

"It's not that big of a deal," Jay mutters from his spot as his eyes go from the Instagram post to his Exile and Belonging in Modern Literature reading that's due tomorrow, bright yellow highlighter in hand. Typically, you'd find the reading buried deep at the bottom of his school backpack. But because Jay ran into you this morning and because he complained to you about the amount of work he's fallen behind on and because you had threatened him to do his work or else you're not going on another date––a fake date that is––with him, he figured he should at least get one reading done and annotated, despite his strong dislike for highlighters (they hurt his eyes, okay?)

What he doesn't know, however, is how your threat was completely full of bluff––but don't tell him that.

"It is so a big deal, for you at least!" Jake hops off the bed and lands on the wooden floors of Jay's dorm room so hard, Jay winces and sends a mental apology to the poor person who lives below him.

Jake suddenly gasps. "I have to meet her, Jay! As your best friend, it's practically mandatory that I meet her."

Jay opens his mouth to protest, but not before Jake interrupts him once again. "Oh! We can bring Sunghoon too, it'll be so fun! The best friends meet the girlfriend."

Jay can't think of anything worst. Jay imagines that bringing you to meet his best friends would just intimidate you out of dating him––fake dating him, that is. Obviously.

He stares at his friend in agony then back at the reading in front of him––the one Jake said he'd come over to help annotate, but the intention completely left Jake's head the second he heard about Jay's recent dating life.

"You don't have to meet her," Jay says pointedly. "Plus, you already know her."

Jake frowns at his friend's excuse. "Yeah, but that was in middle school! This is different."

Jay's hands shuffle through the reading's pages in front of him as he realizes there's no way the two of them are going to finish the assignment at this point. He supposes he'll have to save death by blindness from highlighters for another day and hope you still agree to go out with him.

Jake suddenly gasps in realization.

"Oh my gosh! Childhood best friends turned college sweethearts," Jake says so dreamily, he might as well plaster heart eyes on. Hopeless romantic, this one.

Before Jay can argue, the piercing sound of three loud knocks echo through the small room, followed with a:

"Jay, are you in? It's me!"

Jay stills at the sound of your sweet voice. He whips his head to Jake, who is also frozen in place.

But the widened-eye boy is quick to come to his senses––unfortunately quicker than Jay himself––because the next thing Jay knows, Jake's eyes are lighting up and he's running to the door, ignoring Jay's screaming whispers through this seething teeth that were somewhere along the lines of Jake––stop, I swear to god if you open that door I'm gonna fucking--

"Y/N!" Jake swings the door wide open, revealing an overly excited him and a frozen Jay half-way to the door, as if he was about to grab the very boy welcoming you in. It's as if we're living in a Sims game and the player clicked pause on this very moment.

Jake's eyes are wildly going back and forth between you and your supposed boyfriend, as if he was waiting for Jay to run over and smother you in hugs and kisses...or something couple-y like that. Jay wouldn't know.

"Uh––hi," you're awkwardly standing inside the room now, a relatively large paper brown bag resting in your palms as you look around for a surface to place it on. Jay makes his way to you without a second thought, quickly taking the bag out of your hold.

"You seemed stressed out earlier, so I figured I could bring you some food as a little pick me up. I didn't know what you liked, so I kinda just got a little of everything from the dining hall. Nothing fancy," you're rambling, but smiling so excitedly at him, Jay doesn't know what to say.

Instead, his mouth slightly drops open as he stares at you in awe, mostly because he's not used to being on the receiving end of such spontaneously generous actions––all while Jake's still excitedly looking back and forth between the two of you, as if he was expecting a marriage proposal to come next.

"Oh wow. Thank you. Really," Jay, still touched by your simple act of kindness, softly says as he places the bag on the limited amount of empty space on his desk surface––the rest of it is covered with his untouched textbooks and unfinished assignments. He wonders if you did this out of playing your role or just because you wanted to. He internally hopes it's the latter. "Seriously, you didn't have to do."

"Nah, don't worry. I wanted to," you shrug with such a genuine smile that Jay realizes he actually missed your smile.

Despite having seen you during your brief run-in this morning when you were fetching your morning coffee, Jay realizes he missed you. The two of you haven't been seeing each other recently because of your busy schedule and if Jay didn't realize it before, he's now sure he missed your company and presence around.

Weird.

"Well, you two have fun! Sunghoon needs me for something," Jake suddenly chirps from his place near the front door, halfway through with putting his shoes on already, breaking the comforting silence that fell between the two of you.

Jay frowns. "But you said you were free all da––"

"SUNGHOON IS CALLING BYE!" And before Jay can even register what's happening, Jake's out the door without another word.

"Er..sorry about him, he's...weird," Jay scratches the back of his neck as he returns to his spot on his bed, mentally setting a reminder to yell at Jake later for leaving the two of you alone. Jay doesn't know exactly why, but he's nervous at the fact that you're here in his room. It's not like you two are complete strangers––or whatever you guys were before––anymore. "Good job on your part, though. How'd you know Jake was here?"

"Oh uh, I didn't"," you let out an awkward laugh. "I just felt like doing it."

Heat rushes to Jay's cheeks and he's not sure 1) what this newfound feeling is and 2) how to respond, yet again.

Having expecting you to leave after dropping the food off, Jay's taken by surprise when you take your shoes off and come over to his bed to look at the pile of work he's spread out.

"Is this everything you have to do?" You question the stressed-out boy as you flip through the various assignments, readings, and essays he put off in the past week.

"More or less," he groans. This is no rare occurrence by any means––Jay being behind in his work––but this time, Jay realizes he may actually be in deep shit, considering he has no idea where to begin.

Right as Jay's expecting a scolding from you, he looks up to meet a look of sympathy on your face. "Well, I mean, I'm pretty much done with my day. I can try to help, I recognize some of these readings from last semester."

Jay thinks to himself that the universe has sent him an angel through the form of you.

"Really? Wow, you were't kidding when you said you'd be a good girlfriend," he sends you a surprised look.

"I'm just being nice, Jay. A concept I'm sure you're not familiar with," you remark back at him, causing his forming smile to grow into a laugh.

"I can too be nice! Need I remind you of who's paying you $500, covering all of our dates AND giving you rides to class everyday?" He remarks pointedly at you, a teasing look resting in his eyes as you're reminded of the first of many times he's come to pick you up before class:

~ ~ ~

You're late.

This never happens.

But then again, your life's been a series of unexpected occurrences lately. Such as the fact that you're currently known as Jay Park's girlfriend, for one.

You're scrambling out of bed once you take one look at your phone and realize shit, you're already late for class. Throwing on whatever articles of clothing your eyes land on first, you're already mentally groaning at the fact that you'll have to skip breakfast and run across your campus to get to said class.

Curse your professor for hosting her lecture at the furthest possible building away from your dorm. Curse the architect who decided to make your campus so large.

You're running down the steps outside of your dorm building's doors when you're abruptly stopped by a familiar sounding cough. You look up from trying to gather all your belongings together at once to meet the gaze of the source of the sound––Jay.

"Wow, you're a mess," he smirks as he gets up from the spot on his car he was leaning against to make his way over to you.

"Gee, thanks! Good morning to you too," you flash him a sarcastic smile before your default frown quickly makes it way back onto your face.

"Aren't you gonna ask me why I'm here?" He grins as he grabs hold of your backpack to sling it across his own back as the two of you walk towards his car.

"Why are you here, Jay?" you sigh, your sarcastic tone hard to miss.

"To give you a ride to class, of course!" He's beaming at you, as if he's a pre-pubescent teen who just won their first girlfriend a prize from the arcade's claw machine.

Oh. That explains the car, you figure. Deep down inside, you're relieved that you'll no longer be bursting through the lecture hall's doors as a sweaty mess––a result of having to run across campus to get to class.

Determined to not let your satisfaction completely show, you resort with a little smile directed towards Jay as he opens the passenger door for you.

The second your enter Jay's car, the strong scent of coffee hits you, and your attention is targeted at the two small cups of coffee sitting in the cupholders of the car.

"Breakfast?" Jay asks as he enters through the driver's side and reaches into the backseat to whip out a small pastry bag. A small, deliciously smelling, pastry bag.

Okay, well. You suppose you could drop the annoyed act now.

Your eyes widen with joy as you grab the bag from him and open it to reveal your favorite breakfast sandwich. He's been taking notes, you'll give him that point.

"Okay, you win. Thank you," you grace him with a soft smile before taking a bite into the glorious gift in your hands.

"Of course, I was just feeling nice," he grins at you as he starts his car. "But don't get used to it." His tone is serious, but his smile directed towards you says differently.

And the fact that he still showed up to drive you to class the next morning.

And the next.

~ ~ ~

"And need I remind you who has to date your dumb ass for the $500 in question?" Your eyes narrow at the boy who can't seem to get that damn smile off his face.

Jay sticks his tongue out at you, ending the conversation. Really Jay? What are you, five? Well, mentally––probably.

You're looking around his minuscule dorm room for a place to sit down, and Jay can't help but feel embarrassed now that you're here, in his messy single studio room that pretty much reflects how Jay treats every other responsibility of his oh so hard life: neglected.

"Uh...here, you can sit on my bed," Jay immediately offers as he moves to the side to make room for your presence––and it isn't much, considering the university only provided him a twin XL bed which is definitely not built for two grown college-aged kids.

If you told yourself a few weeks ago that you'd be shoulder to shoulder on a bed belonging to the guy you cringed at the very thought of, you wouldn't have believed yourself. You wouldn't have believed yourself if you said you were actually glad Jay let you stay instead of kicking you out after delivering the food. Huh.

Weird.

"You know, this kinda reminds me of when we were kids. I always carried us through those horrible multiplication tests in the fifth grade," you wink at him as you settle in the spot next to him, hands grabbing hold of the papers in his lap.

Jay let out a laugh, nudging your shoulder with his. "Hey! The twelve times table is hard, okay?"

You roll your eyes at him––a habit of yours he's noticed whenever the two of you are together, but more recently, he thinks it's been more out of fun than annoyance.

He wonders why.

When Jay had first brought up the idea of bringing you as his date to his father's company dinner, you had expected a fairly fancy five-star restaurant with a formal dress code––for you've become accustomed to Jay's lifestyle. Turns out, your expectations can continue to be exceeded. Because what you had expected to be a simple dinner with a few other business men and women turned out to be an entire party, hosted in a hotel whose interior resembled something close to a castle (Or what you assume a castle looks like, as you've never personally been into a castle yourself, but this hotel is close enough).

Your eyes sparkle at the extravagant columns and diamond chandeliers hanging high above you, and Jay smiles at the expression on your face; like a little girl being brought to the amusement park for the first time ever.

"Wow, this is...wow," you mutter as you drink in the scene in front of you: people dressed in formal attire likewise to yours and Jay's, mingling and drinking what you imagine to be beverages that cost more than your entire life's worth.

Jay laughs from behind you, "Yeah the company goes a little...extra when it comes to these company dinners."

You scoff as you look up at him. "Oh really, you don't say?" You look around and you're suddenly aware of the many people surrounding the two of you and the attention you've acquired ever since entering the building.

"Jay, people are staring." You shuffle closer to him, your voice lowering down to a whisper.

"Well, it's not everyday the son of the company's CEO brings his girlfriend with him, so...looks like we'll be the talk of the party tonight. Smiles on," he winks at you, and you just know he's loving the attention the two of you are receiving right now.

"Jay Park? Is that you?" You hear a warm voice call out from behind the two of you.

The two of you turn around to meet the owner of the voice, a middle-aged woman dressed in an evening gown that matches the pattern of high-end brands you've been recognizing ever since arriving.

"Mrs. Lee! It's so nice seeing you again," Jay cheerily addresses the woman as the two of you bow in greeting.

You internally giggle at the thought of your Jay being so picture-perfect in the eyes of his father's co-workers.

"This is Y/N," he continues, his hand finding its way to your back, protectively resting it there as you go to introduce yourself. "My girlfriend."

You swear you feel goosebumps rise from where he's lightly touching you, and more so when he introduces you as his girlfriend.

You tell yourself it's just your nerves. Yes, that's it, you're just nervous. I mean, you're in a room filled with people who could easily pay off all your college loans with just a snap of their fingers, who wouldn't be nervous? Right? Right.

"Y/N! It's a pleasure to finally meet you, I've heard so much about you!" Mrs. Lee excitedly exclaims as you turn to Jay with a slightly confused look plastered on your face. He mirrors your expression as he shrugs, moving to stand behind you completely, bringing his hands to rest lowly at your hips.

His hands feel like feathers on the thin fabric of your evening gown, so light, so delicate, as if he's unsure if he's crossing a line. It leaves you wanting more, wanting to naturally lean against him and his warmth. You quick to shake the thought of your head as Mrs. Lee chirps up again.

"Jay's father is always talking about how you've been keeping Jay pleasantly busy nowadays! Good thing too, about time this poor boy settle down for someone as beautiful as you," the woman rambles on as you feel a blush creep up on your cheeks at the thought of Jay talking about you to his dad. If only they knew.

"We should probably go find our seats, I think the dinner is beginning soon," Jay says from behind you, saving the two of you from having to listen to Mrs. Lee's story of how she's known Jay ever since he was five years old and seeing him grow into this mature, loving, young man is so amazing. Oh look! I have baby pictures.

Yeah, he was more so saving himself from embarrassment.

The two of you bid your goodbyes before Jay gently uses the hand on your back to maneuver you through the crowd of socializing business moguls.

"She's not wrong, you know," you feel Jay dip his head so he's speaking near your ear, his warm breath tickling your earlobe, as the two of you make your way through the large foyer room.

"Hm?" You hum in question, turning your head up just enough to be able to make eye contact with him as he responds to your look of confusion.

"You look beautiful tonight," he says, eye contact not breaking once. You freeze in your steps.

You stare back at him in silence. Oh.

Your mind is panicking as it flips through your mental book of responses, unsure of what to say back. But because your mind is cloudy from staring at a put-together Jay in a dark navy suit to match your dress (mixed with the nervous butterflies in your stomach––have they always been there?), the only sound that's able to leave your lips is the small stutter of a:

"Huh?"

Wow Y/N, you had one job. A simple "thank you" could've sufficed! And you went with "Huh"?

You felt like a fifth grader who just learned from a friend of a friend of a friend that their crush likes them back.

"U-um. Mrs. Lee. What she said about you. You look good, really," somehow your nervousness made its way over to Jay now––his eyes flickering from yours to anywhere, anything, else in the room––the awkward tension growing tenfold each second.

Goddamnit Y/N, this is just Jay you're talking to, get a grip.

You're knocked back into reality when he slightly nudges your back to continue making your way to the main ball room, where the dinner is being held.

"Is that a compliment from the Jay Park?" Your smirk can't be seen by Jay, since he's still trailing behind you, but he can definitely hear it through your tone.

"Don't make me take it back," he chuckles, his words felt against your neck, leaving behind a tingly sensation you're not sure why you're feeling. You're glad he's behind you, so he isn't able to see the blush creeping onto your face for the second time tonight.

Jay gives a small nod to the people behind the check-in desk stationed at the entrance as the two of you waltz right into a large ball room lined with countless circular dining tables. So much for a small business dinner.

As the two of you approach one of the tables placed at the front of the room, you notice a familiar figure seated next to the seats reserved for you and Jay.

"Y/N!" Jake exclaims as he gets up from his seat to greet the both of you. "I'm so glad you made it, Jay was so excited to bring you tonight. Deadass would not stop talking about it."

Jay lets out a noise that falls somewhere between a cough and a goose being strangled, his widened eyes warning his talkative friend to just shut up. He's silently cursing the company for always seating his and Jake's family at the same table for these events.

"Aw, is that so? He's lucky he's cute or else I wouldn't have agreed," you grin, winking at your assumed boyfriend sitting next to you.

"Hey, YOU were the one excited to come! I recall a certain someone's face lighting up when I suggested we go shopping for tonight," Jay immediately retorts.

"Only because you were buying," you giggle, causing Jake to laugh as well.

"Damn, Jay. Tough," Jake jokingly adds as you laugh alongside him. The scowl sitting on Jay's face expresses the opposite of what he's feeling right now: warmth filling him up from the sound of your laughter and the image of you getting along so well with his best friend.

"I'm gonna get us some drinks, you two have fun making fun of me," Jay narrows his eyes at the two of you as he gets up from his seat. You bid him off with a smile before turning back to Jake.

"No but really though, this boy would not stop talking about you coming tonight. Then again, he doesn't really ever stop talking about you," Jake nonchalantly says, not knowing how much he was exposing his friend to you right now.

You raise an eyebrow up in response, "Oh really?"

"Seriously! I don't know what you did to him, Y/N, but this Jay I've been seeing recently is new. He complains a lot less about life nowadays, especially on the days he sees you," he leans back in his chair as his comment brings a smile to your face. Little does he know.

You stretch your neck up to find the boy in question and spot him right as he's returning to your shared table, two drinks in hand. You lock eyes with him from across the room and without a second thought, you're giving him a genuine smile that he's immediately returning.

Your heart beats faster at the view.

You wonder why.

It's 3:07AM when you hear the first ding.

You're not 100% sure as of why you're awake at this hour on a Tuesday night––perhaps a combination of your restless thoughts and feelings not letting you sleep plus the typical stress that comes hand-in-hand with the life of a college student.

It's 3:09AM when you hear the second ding, and you brush it off, assuming it was just Heeseung spamming you with memes again––something he does often when he also can't sleep (you found this out the hard way).

It's still 3:09AM when you hear the third ding, and at 3:10AM , you finally reach over and decide to acknowledge the being who's bothering you at this godforsaken hour.

Jay [3:07AM]: Y/N

Jay [3:09AM]: hi

Jay [3:09AM]: r u awake rn

Y/N [3:10AM]: unfortunately so

Y/N [3:11AM]: why are you up

Jay [3:11AM]: come outside

Y/N [3:13AM: jay it's 3am

Jay [3:13AM]: ye and? don't tell me ur a college student with a curfew

Jay [3:14AM]: plus im alrdy waiting for u outside so u have no choice

Jay [3:15AM]: :)

You groan at your bright phone screen currently illuminating your dark dorm room.

You ponder the consequences you may have to suffer tomorrow if you stay up any later than you already have. But considering the fact that you're probably just going to stay awake lying in bed for god knows how long anyways, why not?

(And you would like to point out that this decision has nothing to do with the fact that you haven't seen Jay in a few days and that maybe a tiny, tiny, tiny, part of you may have missed his presence. Nothing.)

And since that logic is obviously valid (you really gotta work on justifying your life choices), you're suddenly grabbing a hoodie from your closet and hoping it'll be enough to keep you, who's merely in an old band t-shirt from high-school and pajama shorts, warm.

The breeze hits your skin the second you open the doors to your dorm's building, and you're met with the view of Jay's sleek, black BMW that probably costs more than your tuition. He waves at you from the driver's seat, motioning for you to get in.

"To what do I owe you the pleasure at this hour," you deadpan at him with a stone-cold voice as you enter through the passenger's side door, hoping your tone was enough to hide the fact that you're giddy at the fact he invited you out at 3AM in the morning. Like a high-school girl sneaking out of her house to meet up with her bad-boy boyfriend that her parents dislike.

The second you enter his car, you're instantly comforted by the warm air blasting through his vents and his playlist softly playing in the background. Jay's pajama pants and messy hair give you more than enough information to know that he probably just rolled out of his own bed as well. You don't know why, but your view: Jay in his oversized hoodie with his unkept hair in front of your dorm building at 3AM on a Tuesday night, gives you comfort in weird ways you can't explain even if you tried.

But it's obviously just your cloudy, 3AM mind not thinking straight. Obviously.

"When I can't sleep, I go on drives around campus. It helps clear my mind," he says, looking over at you to give you a quick smile before starting his car. "Plus, SnapMap said you were still awake, so...figured you'd wanna join."

"Oh so what, you're my stalker now? You're not driving to the woods to kill me now, are you?" You tease, an eyebrow brought up. Jay lets out a laugh from beside you as he begins to drive further into your campus.

"Guess you'll just have to wait and see," he throws you a wink before reverting his gaze back to the road, mindlessly driving to wherever the road decides to take him.

A comfortable silence falls in between the two of you as Jay continues to drive endless routes around your campus. You look over to the boy driving next to you and take in his features––you don't know what changed, but you no longer feel the same anger or annoyance bubbling within you when you're around him. You're not sure when this changed, but you figure it's just the effect of desensitization. After all, you've been spending so much time with him, you're bound to get used to it. Right?

"Why were you up?" Jay finally asks after a few minutes of just the two of you silently basking in each other's presences.

"Ah, you know. The usual. Endless thoughts running through my mind, stress from school, nothing new," you sign, giving him a soft smile followed with a shrug.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

You answer him with silence as you search your head for the answer.

"I don't know. This is kinda weird, isn't it?" You don't know why you get a sudden surge of confidence, but before you can stop yourself, you find yourself rambling on. "If you had told me a month ago that I'd be here driving around with you when it's nearly 4AM, I would've laughed in your face."

Jay doesn't know whether to laugh or scoff. "Is the idea of hanging out with me that unappealing to you?"

You give him a serious look back. "I mean, up until a month ago when you needed me for whatever this game is, you literally pretended I didn't exist."

Oh. Awkward.

You freeze at your own words, mentally screaming at yourself for letting the words leave your mouth. Why, why, why.

"Y/N..." Jay says after clearing his throat after a few seconds of silence.

"No it's fine, it was a joke," you awkwardly cough and direct your attention to anything else around you right now. The view of your campus' buildings zooming by. The clicking of Jay's blinker when he switches lanes. The quiet roaring of his car's engine. The nervous tapping of his fingers against the steering wheel.

The rest of the ride is excruciatingly silent as he exits the main road and into an empty parking lot of some administration building made out of glass that has too many floors for you to count.

You don't know why you feel your heart beating in your throat as Jay puts the car into park––why you feel uneasy. You slightly turn towards him in your seat, hoping to pick up any sign of well...anything from him.

You don't know why you feel a twinge of guilt––it's not like what you said was necessarily wrong. If you were being honest, you were slightly bothered by how the two of you seemed to silently agree not to mention your past all this time. You were always one to seek answers, to seek closure. You couldn't help but bring it up––Jay was your best friend during those years. For him to just wake up one day and pretend you were nothing to him hurt you, and you couldn't help but still wonder what in the world you did to initiate his actions.

"I'm sor–" You're interrupted with his timid voice, as if he was almost afraid to speak.

"I'm not good with people." He's nibbling on his bottom lip, fingers nervously picking at a spot on the steering wheel.

You're opening and closing your mouth, unsure how to respond. You're 100% positive you look like a fish right now. Good for you.

"I don't know why. Jake calls it commitment issues but in order to have commitment, people have to stay in my life. And people just...don't. They're all bound to leave at some point. So what's the point of putting in effort into relationships if they're just going to leave you at the end?"

You're stunned by his sudden confession, not having been prepared for such a heavy topic to arise between the two of you. Up until tonight, your interactions had always been light-hearted and easy––you guys got along well. You didn't know this is how he felt all along.

But you knew where he was coming from.

You knew what Jay had gone through as a child––his mother having left him and his dad when he was young. You remember when your parents had told you the news at the young age of 13, and you remember the pain and sorrow you felt for your then friend. All you wanted to do was go to him and comfort him, but he had already cut you out from his life by then.

"Or maybe I'm the problem. My dad barely acknowledges my existence because he thinks giving me an allowance is all the parenting I need, my friends probably only stick around because they feel bad for me, you wouldn't even be here if it weren't for the bet, and, fuck, I'm literally known as the campus' fuckboy," Jay continues, falling deeper and deeper into the hole he dug himself.

He hates this, he hates opening up and feeling vulnerable, so he doesn't know why he's doing it now. He doesn't know why he feels comfortable voicing out his fears and worries when he's around you. But he does know it's a new feeling––one he doesn't know how to deal with.

"Jay," you lace your voice with as much comfort as you can provide. None of this is his fault, you want to tell him. "I'm sorry."

"Why are you sorry? You didn't do anything," he says with a hint of bitterness and you can't tell if it's directed towards you or the topic at hand.

You're completely turned in your seat now to face him––despite the fact that he refuses to meet your gaze, afraid that looking at you is gonna bring out the most vulnerable in him. "You can talk to me. Talking about it makes it a lot easier. I'll always be here for you, as a friend."

Jay doesn't know what it is or why, but something in him snaps at the sound of a certain word falling out of your lips. Friend. Friend.

Friends don't make his heart beat nervously whenever he's around them. Friends don't keep him up at 3AM in the morning, pondering about his feelings for them. Friends don't provide him with this new, warm comfort he's become accustomed to whenever he's around you.

Deep down, Jay knows you didn't mean to add fuel to the fire. But because he's strong-headed, stubborn, and hates how vulnerable he feels next to you, he unleashes his emotions without thinking about the destruction coming along.

"It's none of your business, Y/N. Forget I said anything. You're just a toy for this stupid game and when it's all over we can go back to our own lives and forget this ever happened."

His sudden words cut deep, but they hurt him more than you. The second the words tumble out of his mouth, he's hit with the feeling of instant regret washing over him, and the lump forming in his throat restricts him from finding the right words to take them back.

The silence that falls between the two of you this time is different. It's a cold silence. A loud silence.

Jay feels his walls coming back up around him––the ones you managed to get through––and all he wants to do is apologize but he's terrified. Terrified of seeing your reaction, terrified of losing you again. For the second time.

You tell yourself he doesn't mean it. You tell yourself that he's just enduring more pain that one should ever receive.

But you also tell yourself that this wouldn't be the first time Jay leaves you in the dust.

You tell yourself that you're foolish for ever believing a friendship, or more, could come out of this act at the end. That you're so naive for feeling those stupid, stupid butterflies you've started to notice in your stomach whenever you see, or even think of, him.

"Okay," you begin with a firm tone. You're hurt, but you refuse to show it. You won't let him hurt you for a second time. Not again.

"Just...find me when you need me. As your fake girlfriend or just...me. I'm still here for you," is the last thing you say before un-clicking your seatbelt and leaving his car, beginning your walk back to your dorm hall.

Jay is unsure about many things in life. He's unsure about what he wants to do in the future, he's unsure of where he's going to settle in life, heck, he's unsure about what to have for lunch tomorrow. But he's sure about one thing.

That he's wearing his heart on his sleeve right now, and it's all because of you.

That you've become this new lifeline and he has to choose between holding onto you or drowning.

When Jay wakes up the next morning, his first gut instinct is to get ready to pick you up for class. But today's different. Jay doesn't know where the two of you stand now, especially after last night.

Jay doesn't know how to deal with this combination of unknown emotions he's been feeling lately. They didn't come out of no where, by any means, he realizes. They've been slowly growing over the past month of seeing you so often––like a plant he's been watering overtime, not expecting it to bloom into a flower so suddenly––but he figured it was nothing more than just enjoying the company of a friend.

Until he realizes that the term friend just doesn't suite you anymore––not to him, at least. And that scares him. It scares him that you've made him genuinely smile more in this past month than he ever has in his 19 years of living. It scares him that when he's around you he can't comprehend his own thoughts, his feelings. It scares him that you make him vulnerable, that you've changed him. That you've managed to make the walls that he's spent so long building and polishing to crumble with a simple tap of your finger.

In a perfect world, Jay would have already told you all this––he would be unafraid of how you would react, unafraid of your rejection, unafraid of losing this growing relationship with you. But alas, we don't live in a perfect world. And so when Jay drives to class that day, he drives right past your dorm building.

"Where's Y/N?" is the first thing Jake questions when he enters Jay's car that morning, confused by your absence, having been used to you being in the front seat every morning when Jay goes to give Jake rides to class as well.

"I don't know," Jay mutters, unemotional eyes focused on the road in front of him, not interested in continuing a conversation that involves thinking about you.

Jake hesitates as curiosity gets the best of him. "Did you guys get into a fight or something?"

Jay's hands tighten around the steering wheel of his car. "Or something. Let's just leave it at that."

There are a few beats of silence before Jake speaks up again.

"Well, I guess this works out because I wanted to talk to you about something."

Jay continues to stare straight ahead of him, focusing on just trying to get by without mentally beating himself up at the simple thought of you.

The simple thought of you and your smile. Your witty remarks. Your stupid eye rolls. Your laughter. Your kindness. So much for not thinking about you.

"I'm calling it off," Jake's words catch Jay off guard.

"Huh? Calling what off?"

"The bet. I'm calling it off. I don't care about the textbook fees I'll have to pay next semester. Look, fight or not, you and Y/N are good for each other, everyone can see it. And I really don't want this to end up being one of those messed up teen TV shows where the girlfriend finds out the entire relationship was based off of a stupid game and then they break up and the boyfriend falls into eternal sadness and regret. And I don't wanna see you sad, dude. So yeah! Congrats," although he's admitting defeat, Jake's beaming widely, just content with the fact that his best friend has finally found happiness through the form of you. "You win."

But Jay feels like the opposite of a winner. Because even though his only intention coming into this was simply winning the bet, his life isn't as simple as it was a month ago. Because he discovered something much more valuable than some stupid textbook fees or five hundred dollars or getting his physics homework done for an entire semester.

Something he's scared he's already lost.

You.

⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺

The next time you see Jay is at the same time and place as when he first ever appeared to pick you up––at 12:17PM on a Friday afternoon, as you're exiting the doors of the lecture building home to your awfully long Capitalism in World History class. This time, however it's different.

Because this time, it's one month later, and Jay Park is no longer a forgotten side character in the story of your life. This time, you're frustrated because it's been three days since you've last heard from Jay. And because it's been three days since you've last heard from him, you can't focus on anything else, and because you can't focus on anything else, you're falling behind on every other aspect in your life. Jay's somehow managed to become the center of your life without even having to be present.

Well, up until now. Up until you go down the steps of your lecture hall's entrance and look up to be met with a figure leaning on a car you're far too familiar with. You freeze in your steps as you make eye contact with the boy you've been thinking about non-stop for the past month three days.

Your mind tells you to walk away, to just follow your flight instinct instead of fight, to just go back to your normal life. But here's the thing. Ever since Jay's made his way back to your life, it's been far from normal.

And if you're being honest, you had no interest in going back to your normal life. Normal's overrated anyways. You find your legs bringing yourself over to him, your heart leading the way.

"Hi," you simply say, planting yourself right in front of him.

"Hi."

"What are you doing here?" You already know the answer, but you want to hear him say it.

"Waiting for you," Jay doesn't hesitate in answering you. This time will be different, he tells himself.

"I can walk myself home, thanks," you state, but your actions tell differently, as you make no sign of moving from your spot in front of him.

Jay's mind contemplates telling you everything. About how he regrets that friendship-breaking decision he made that one fateful day in the eighth grade, about his true feelings, about how he first suspected these feelings when he was 11 years old and saw you in your fancy get-up for the sixth grade dance but put it off as a little crush, and about how the same feelings grew into something so, so much more in the present. But seeing that putting all these thoughts into words would involve more than one functioning brain cell (which is all he's convinced he has in the moment, for the view of you staring up at him, looking like that, has his brain short-circuiting), he settles with:

"He called it off. It's over. The bet."

"Oh."

Silence.

Okay, Jay. This is your chance. Say it.

"Is that it?" You lift an eyebrow, awaiting for more explanation. When it doesn't come, you slightly nod and start backing away. "I'll see you around then."

Is that it? Do the two of you just go back to your respective lives now? How can Jay do that, when he doesn't even recall what his life was like before you entered it––and especially when he has absolutely no interest in going back to that life?

Fuck it.

"Y/N!" He stands up straight, a newfound confidence taking over. This time will be different, he tells himself. Because now, he knows what he wants. For sure.

You turn towards him, to see him already making his way towards you, stopping in his steps when he finds himself close enough to you that he can't concentrate anymore.

"I'm sorry for ditching you in the eighth grade. I'm sorry for ignoring you since then. I'm sorry for dragging you into this stupid mess and for pushing you away and I'm sorry for calling you a toy. Because it's far from truth. I like you. A lot. And––and I'm scared. I'm scared of what this means for us, because I just keep messing things up and all I know is that I don't wanna wake up tomorrow and realize you're not in my life anymore and––"

"Woah, woah, Jay. Slow down," you look up at him, the corners of your lips threatening to curve up into a smile. "You're an idiot, you know."

Jay's never really confessed his feelings to anyone before, per say, so he doesn't really know what to expect. But he's watched enough Netflix rom-coms in this lifetime (which is still not that many) to know that hearing the words "you're an idiot" isn't what you're supposed to hear after pouring your heart and soul out. Surely not, right?

"I––I'm not sure how to respond to that," he quietly says, searching your eyes for a sign, for anything. You giggle at his sudden shyness as you grab both his arms and look at him right in the eyes.

"It's okay. I get it, if anything, I'm also scared. But you somehow got me wrapped around your stupid finger, and I hate it," you smirk at him, your hands slowly making their way up his arms to circle around his neck.

Jay's hands naturally fall at your waist as he lets out a breathe he didn't even know he was holding as he returns your smirk. "Well, I could say the same about you. And I also hate it, for your information."

"Hmm, is that so? I guess it cancels out then, right?" You smile at him as he's pulling you in so close, your head turns cloudy.

Jay grins at you, his eyes holding so much joy and endearment as they quickly flicker down to your lips before returning to your own eyes. "I guess this only means one thing then."

"Mm, and what's that?"

And before Jay can answer––and because your life's been anything but normal lately––you make the first move this time, moving your head up to close the small gap between the two of you.

His arms instinctively tighten around you as you capture his lips with your very own, and Jay swears he's about to lift off into space right now. He's on cloud nine, and he makes no plans to touch the ground ever again.

The kiss quickly becomes fervent, all the pent-up tension that the two of you had for one another finally finding its way out, all the words that were previously left unsaid finally expressing themselves. You don't even care if you're being judged by the conservative faculty members of your school right now, or by the looks of fellow students walking past the two of you.

You try your best to keep yourself from smiling as he continues to press his lips against yours, his hand moving to hold your chin, guiding your mouth with his.

Before you find yourself getting carried away, you step back to take a breath, resting your forehead against his chest as his hands rest against your back. He smiles at the sound of you giggling against him.

Jay takes a step back to take one look at you and realizes, in this moment, that change can be good. And he's willing to undergo this change. As long as it's with you.

⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺ ⸺

The next morning, you bounce down the steps of your dorm building's entrance to meet the wide, bright smile of your ex-childhood-bestfriend-turned-fake-boyfriend-turned-real-boyfriend waiting for you in front of his car, small pastry bag in hand. You smile back at him.

Jay drives you to class that day.

And everyday after that.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ :

✰ let me know what you think! if u made it til the end, mwah :') <3

[retrievaldivision]

comparing how we've seen dispatch operate in manga canon to the BITE model for cult identification <3

putting this all under a readmore for thorough discussions of cults and suicide . heres my meta everyone

so basically. imho dispatch operates like a cult and will grelle ron and othello need to dip asap and ut had the right idea for leaving. this is basically evidence for my theory that at some point its going to get revealed that the "higher ups" are uhhhh. fucked up actually and the squad is getting emotionally manipulated. alright lets get to it

starting off w behavioral control letsgo

"promote dependence and obedience"

-so the big thing that signifies this in canon for me is the fact that . as sascha talked about in ch 105 (#brainwashedgirlqueen) the reapers are dependent on dispatch and the higher ups for forgiveness of their sin. if they dont play by their rules theyre not getting out of punishment purgatory

"modify behavior with rewards and punishment"

-remember when grelle was gone for an arc and then came back in campania and was like haha yeah ive been on suspension . i mean. there it is. theres definitely an argument to be made here about the fact that grelle was killing random ppl and like yeah definitely wld call for uhhh not being in public However-- why i kept this in was bc like . yeah she was being suspended for doing some mass murder etc-- but she was also being suspended bc she fully left dispatch during that time. like she was off with angelina pretending to be her butler not @ hq literally in disguise and thats why will had to come get her ass in the first place. which i think should be pointed out here

"dictate where and with whom you live"

-keeping this on here tentatively bc we dont know specifics but like. HQ. i think its important to point out that they all have this building where theyre all supposed to be

"control clothing and hairstyle"

-the suit uniform swag period.

"restrict leisure time and activities"

-again pointing out saschas monologue. the part where she points out theyre all supposed to be "worked to the bone".

-in the extended version of the BITE model they also talk about weaponizing keeping a cult member busy thru tasks bc if they are so pre occupied with tasks it leaves them w less time to question whats going on and . Yeah .

moving on to informational control

"deliberately withhold and distort information"

-pointing out how in campania ron and grelle had no fucking clue who undertaker was even tho he was supposed to have been a Huge Deal while he was at dispatch. why werent ron and grelle privy to this info why did they have to hear it from ut himself . unless ur deliberately withholding shit it makes no sense as to why they shldnt know abt the guy who destroyed half of HQ even if it happened before their time

"forbid you from speaking with ex members and critics"

-this is in purple and only half credited bc the strongest example i can think is from tmbd and not the manga but i still do want to bring it up (and i think is worth mentioning bc yana did draw those bitches into the manga when talking abt deserters so) but the whole. will monologue in tmbd where hes like yeah ur name will be stricken from the records . its a little uh. yeah its coded

"divide information into insider vs outsider doctrine"

-yeah so remember when the fight was about to happen in campania and grelle was like this is shinigami business stay out of it outsider to sebastian. like literally called him an outsider. its the vocabulary.

"encourage others to spy and report on others' 'misconduct'"

-for this i am citing the entirety of management div and the fact that its a thing. it can def be argued that management is also there to intervene during like very fucked situations where just retrieval div cant handle it as we've seen will do. but also like. it does seem esp w ripper arc that management div is there to narc on ppl for not following rules etc.

-Also for this one wanted to point out that in the extended BITE model they talk abt using buddy systems so like. u arent truly alone there is always someone who can rat on u . and how thru most of the arcs w reapers present theyve been in groups of two (ron and will in circus, ron and grelle in campania, sascha and ludger in green witch, othello and grelle during the whole ut standoff). again this can also be argued that theyre there for helping purposes in terms of fights But Also. its a little coded u guys imho

moving onto thought control

"instill black vs white, us vs them & good vs evil thinking"

-going to be talking abt this again for the second point but the way that specific language is used to moralize what the higher ups r asking the reapers to do. the way that the reapers describe what theyre doing as "collecting" souls whereas demons "hunt" souls even tho they are both. Taking Someones Soul. the fact that this paints their actions in a morally better light even tho it is the same action

-also wanted to point out a moment in the training ova even tho its not manga canon bc it is worth mentioning imo. will's whole monologue when hes getting his glasses where hes like. going to be "protecting" ppls souls and all of this stuff. and that these r Glasses Of Life. all of this pure morality and saviorism the reapers are being taught to attribute to them being in dispatch. Yeah.

"use loaded language and cliches to stop complex thought"

-thinking abt the v specific terms both will (current member of dispatch) and ut (ex member of dispatch) use to describe demons when they call them "vermin" like it is the Exact Same Word that they use. its again the repeated vocabulary to other and condemn demons even though they are Both Entities Who Take Ppls Souls Away. its . hmmmm. why does this not apply to u guys.

last one!

"install irrational fears (phobias) of questioning or leaving the group"

-based on the 105 info, if u leave dispatch, u r never going to be forgiven from ur "sin." even though. we've never seen this "forgiveness" ever actually happen and none of the reapers have ever indicated that anybody they know has ever actually been forgiven. its the irrational fear of not being forgiven even though attaining forgiveness has not, as we seen, been proven to actually be a real thing

"label some emotions as evil, worldly, sinful, or wrong"

-wld like to briefly point out wills monologue to ron in circus abt how having empathy is like not something that should be done

-also the whole . again with the 105 drop. the fact that dispatch is labelling having mental illness as A Sin. lol

"promote feelings of guilt, shame, and unworthiness"

-again going off of 105 . the whole reason they are there and working for the higher ups is bc they have killed themselves and feel the need to get forgiven for it. The Entire Model Of Dispatch Runs On Guilt

"shun you if you disobey or disbelieve"

-circling back to previous points made abt ut being a big deal and ron and grelle only finding out abt him when he literally spelled it out for them . like he was. all info of him was gone that wasnt firsthand witnessed once he deserted. also rons whole moment in campania i believe while hes talking to ryan where hes like i have no respect for ppl who meddle w death. and dispatch has rules against meddling w death.... hmm...

"teach that there is no happiness or peace outside the group"

-bringing up 105 again. there is no forgiveness outside of dispatch that is why they are still there this is the only way they can get forgiveness and presumably peace bc theyve righted their "sin"

in conclusion, the higher ups are fucked up and will grelle ron and othello are getting played <3 i do think this is going to be blatantly revealed at some point like. with everything ive talked about in this post . i do think there is foreshadowing directly pointing to this idea. and i think there will be a moment where will ron grelle and othello realize this . thanks for coming everyone

[bellesowl]

head over heels

- multiple characters

⤷ kuroo, iwaizumi, atsumu, sakusa 

genre: fluff!! ; established relationship

synopsis: in which they realize how head over heels they are for you

word count: 1.4k total :))

warnings: very very slight manga spoilers in iwa’s, i kinda curse a little

- a/n: hi! this is very very late for valentines but i wanted to post it anyways! also, this is very cheesy but when is anything i write not cheesy anyways? & please, i literally write for the same four people BYEE. oh & thank u @omisluvr for beta-ing this ily mwah

- kuroo tetsurou

he falls for your quick wit & intelligence 

we all know that kuroo is known for his wit and for being a big, big nerd LMAOAKJSC 

i think he would appreciate a s/o who’s on his level academically & could compete with him, esp cause he’s so competitive

and we know how quick with his words this man is- it’s probably one of the reasons tsukishima actually listens to this mf tbh

i feel like he would want a s/o who could bite back and put him in his place every once in a while

probably finds it super hot 

“tetsurou!” you yell, glaring at him. 

he raises his hands in alarm, amusement and mischief swimming in his eyes. he had embarrassed you in front of the whole class, immediately correcting you when you claimed that the reaction on the board was an endothermic reaction when in reality, it was an exothermic reaction. sure, he was right, but he didn’t have to point it out like that!

“what?” he questions, “it’s not my fault you lacked docosapentaenoic acid when you were a child.” he finishes with a smug smirk on his face. 

the scowl on your face morphs into a smirk at his words and his own falls at your face. “i think you mean docosahexaenoic acid, oh wise one?” you ask, sarcasm dripping from your tone.

he recovers quickly, yelling about how easy it is to mistake the two. at your laugh, he realizes just how lucky he and whipped he is for you because this? he wouldn’t trade this for the world.

- iwaizumi hajime 

he falls for your independence 

lord knows that having to deal with oikawa practically all his life + the seijoh third years, my man would not be able to deal with a s/o who is super dependent on him

sure, he finds it cute when you’re being clingy & want a hug or a kiss but someone who constantly insecure or is just overall emotionally dependent on him - i feel like it would be a slight turnoff 

now, if you feel insecure, tell him because he would also def appreciate your honesty and that wouldn’t necessarily be seen as a problem

it becomes a problem when you push all your problems onto him and expect him to fix it

but a s/o who can work out their problems on their own but still comes to him for advice and support?

yeah, he’s def in love

you hear a knock on your door and quickly move to open it, hoping it’s who you think it is.

“hey love,” hajime sighs as you usher him into your home, “i’m so sorry i’ve been so busy lately, with volleyball and all the extra applications to be able to move to the states, it’s been a lot.”

you nod, understanding written on your face. “don’t worry about it babe, i get it! do you need any help with anything?”

he shakes his head, instead choosing to wrap his arms around you, nuzzling his nose in your hair and breathing in your intoxicating scent. “being with you is enough. i really am sorry though, did you need anything?”

you shift slightly, guiding him over to the couch and cuddling up to him there, “all i need is this, hajime.”

he kisses the top of your head and while you both talk about everything and nothing, and it hits him that this is it. you’re it for him - because when he’s with you, he feels like he’s home.

- miya atsumu 

he falls for your unrelenting support

i think we all know that atsumu was left out a lot as a kid & i think that one of his biggest fears is that his loving s/o secretly prefers his brother like everyone else

so he probably tries to scare you off by showing his ugly side first- like constantly arguing with you or canceling dates in favor of an extra hour or two of volleyball practice- and you stay? 

he realizes that no matter what, you won’t leave him

“oi! what are ya still doin’ here, slug?” osamu yells, walking into the gym.

“what do ya think? havin’ a tea party?” atsumu quips back, annoyed that his brother interrupted his practice. 

osamu grabs a ball by his feet and chucks it at his brother. “do ya even know what time it is?” at atsumu’s look of confusion he decides that you’re too good for his idiot brother. “it’s already past 8, you’re late for yer movie date with y/n.”

atsumu’s eyes widen and osamu rolls his eyes at his brother’s frantic form, trying to clean up and get out of there as quickly as he can. “just go, i’ll stay to clean up.” osamu sighs, “but you owe me onigiri for a week!” 

back at your house, you’re sitting on the couch, patiently waiting for your boyfriend- who’s late, again. you jump at the frantic knocks at your front door and you open it to a very sweaty, very disheveled atsumu. 

“shit sorry babe! i left my phone on the bleachers and lost track of time but-” you cut him off with a kiss. his eyes widen before fluttering shut. 

“go shower, tsumu- you stink!” you laugh at his scowl “we can probably still get a couple movies in before my parents get back home.” 

he nods, “i really am sorry babe. i didn’t mean to come late, i just got so caught up in my serves and sets and i-”

“it’s fine love, you have to practice to get better, i understand. i would never tell you to skip out on something so important to you when you make sure to come see me in the end anyway.” you interrupt him, “and besides, i love to brag about how my boyfriend is one of the best setters in the nation” you add with a wink. 

he gives you a peck on the cheek before heading towards your bathroom, thinking about how lucky he is to have you by his side. he decides that this will be the last time he’s late because god forbid he does something to ruin something as precious as this. 

- sakusa kiyoomi

he falls for your respectful and understanding attitude

my poor baby

probably had to deal with getting so much shit for his germophobic preferences 

so when you guys started dating he def asked you to respect his boundaries 

and when you did without questioning him?? or making fun of him?? 

he was shocked because even his own cousin would have something to say about his proclivity for extreme cleanliness

you walk into the huge stadium, eyes searching for a mop of black hair, slightly terrified of getting lost. out of the corner of your eye, you see a flash of neon green & yellow.

“komori!” you yell, hoping he could hear you over the excited chatter all around. you see him whip his head around, trying to find the source of the sound. you yell a couple more times, jumping up and down like a lunatic. he finally spots you and smiles, walking over.

“oh, hey! are you here for kiyoomi?” he asks with a mischievous glint in his eyes, already leading you over to where your boyfriend is, “but i have no clue why you would look for him in the middle of the floor. don’t you know your boyfriend by now?”

you slap him lightly on the arm but excuse yourself when you see your boyfriend hiding in the corner with the most hateful glare on his face. as you walk away and towards him, you notice komori walking over to a tall, dark-haired boy. that must be the setter omi was telling me about, you think. you brush it off, deciding you’d bring it up another time and you tap your boyfriend lightly. the glare he gives you almost makes you want to drop dead right there but you notice how his eyes soften and his overall demeanor brightens.

he pulls you towards him, surprising you and everyone watching, and mumbles into your ear, “i thought you had a tutoring session?”

you pull back slightly and notice how he leans down, practically asking for a kiss. you peck his cheek before giggling, “i wanted it to be a surprise! are you surprised? did you miss me?”

he rolls his eyes before pulling down his mask and kissing you properly. “yes and ... yes” he answers, a light blush apparent on his cheeks.

“awwww! you have a crush on me!!! no, you looove me!! that’s so embarrassing!!” you laugh and he shakes his head but silently agrees because yeah, if the permanent butterflies and erratic heartbeat are any indications, he does love you. and he doesn’t plan on stopping for the rest of your lives.

[6okuto]

delivery for. . . @lost-lonnie and rime !

LONNIE!! omg thank u for the req i definitely did Not figure out wha u said. that shocked me completely

rime's a touchy guy. in public it's holding hands or a hand around your waist. in private, specifically when he's needy, it's having you sit/lay in front of him so he can rest his chin on your head, trailing kisses just to distract you, etc. doesn't matter if someone else is there, if they bring it up he just continues (now partially out of spite)

he's very good with quality time. the both of you just like, naturally stick near each other and hang out. he'll walk into your room and just flop onto the bed, sometimes not saying anything, other times asking about what you're up to. rime will go with you during chores or shopping trips with no complaints too

this guy (at first) doesn't realize how much his compliments are like.. [AWOOGA. OUGH] you know what i mean. like when he casually compliments something you're doing, points out a small thing you do that he appreciates a lot, says you've only gotten better since he met you. once he figures out the effect he has he's teasing you about it but he never stops being sincere!

rarely calls you by your name unless it's necessary for his teasing plan. like, purposely coming really close and saying your name to see your reaction. rime mostly uses pet names and if he Doesn't then something's definitely up. it's a little telltale sign that he'll slip up on at times—he sighs when he catches himself before finally talking about what's on his mind

rime likes listening to you read aloud to him while he lays next to/on you. your voice is calming and also who's he to complain about any of the plot drama and characters? even when you think you'll have to recap the next morning, rime has somehow managed to remember more than you expect and is ready to talk about it

i think he'd really try to give you a chance at ice skating at least, if not roller skates in LL. have you seen those old ice skates where they could attach them to the bottom of their boots...think about it!! you have ice you have blades this is basic mathematics! he thinks you look so nice btw. elegant, stunning, beautiful, and he isn't afraid to tell you this

this really works if you're a 16personalities infp. (I am a 16personalities INFP.) he helps with people pleasing tendencies because rime hates seeing you not prioritizing yourself or not treating yourself the way he wants you to. it's when words of affirmation come into play too because he's never going to give up an opportunity to fluster/compliment you.

either hides/takes your glasses because he's such,, he's So Rime. or he knows exactly where they are for your convenience. takes them off for you when you fall asleep and wipes them if they're smudged. it's the duality,, it's the little things

would love to learn how to help you with hair. it'd take some time but i think rime would actually be really good at it so you aren't taking out braids by yourself. to be honest i don't think he spends that much time on his own, so he really respects the time and effort you put in and loves being part of it

rime doesn't like when people try to touch his antlers. if somebody,, gods forbid,, asks/tries to touch your hair, he's suddenly right next to you telling them to fuck off. more specifically something like "hey, dumbass. what do you think you're doing trying to touch my girlfriend?" if they try to defend themselves, rime just stares them down and asks why they're Still In Front Of Him Right Now?

[mystic-myrtille]

Ever since the Alya insta saga ( where fans including myself said Alya was mean on posts forcing creators to post as Alya and Marinette saying they’re besties) I always felt she was the epitome of peer pressure and the force kiss proved it. What’s worse is fans can’t say it’s ooc it’s one of the only constant things in canon. Nino and the girl squad too but Alya as the bff is the main culprit. Hell didn’t she also lock Marinette in with a villain or am I misremembering?

Yeah I remember something like that about how people had issues with their dynamic but Marinette can handle the teasing or smth weird like that. And the "locking Marinette in with a villain" happened in the NY special I believe? I'm actually not sure, I've never watched that special.

I have to agree though, Alya is the one who pressures Marinette the most into doing things she really doesn't want to do and it's extremely annoying.

A problem with Alya's behavior towards Marinette (that I feel isn't talked about enough) is that Alya falls under the category of "the black best friend trope", a racist trope where the black best friend only exists for the white main character (or in this case half white/ white passing). TV tropes describes it as follows:

Your black best friend is sassy. She's never too busy to lend an ear, or come along on your wacky schemes. She is flawless to the point of being unreal. (Until it's time to save the day of course. That's what white heroes are for.) Is it because she has no love life, no apartment, and no family? It's hard to say, but there's one thing for sure. She has a cell phone, and never ignores your calls.

With the expection of Alya having a love life and a family which has been shown on screen, the rest fits pretty well. Alya's role is to somehow shove- I mean guide Marinette to her endgame aka Adrien. Other than that, Alya doesn't have her own arc, her (few) struggles are either brushed off or solved within 2 minutes and when she spends time with Marinette it's never about her, it's about Marinette (or Ladybug in season 4), and by extension, the love square.

Now mix the "Alya being nothing but a tool for bringing the love square closer together" thing with the "It's so funny when Marinette humiliates herself" and voila, you get the canon Alyanette dynamic with Alya getting Marinette into awkard situations and overstepping boundaries constantly (because god forbid Adrienette bonds without there having to be outside meddling). And since the series appears to have this weird philosophy of "the end justifies the means", Alya doesn't face negative consequences like Marinette talking back to her or getting into a fight etc. because ultimately, in the eyes of the writers, she does a good thing. She brings Marinette closer to Adrien in a "fun" way that "entertains" the audience.

And it sucks because I actually liked Alya at first. She was a fun character. Now, I look at her with a weird mix of "you are more often a bad friend than a good one" and "the writers did you so dirty", u know? Alya had potential to be a great character, especially in season 4 after becoming Marinette's confidant, and the writers did nothing with it as always.

Alya exist for the love square and not herself and honestly, I find that to be sad.

[ein-liebloser-wanderer]

Oohh I see you write for wonderlab abnos! Can i request yandere hcs for Blue Smocked Shepherd? Thank u for your hard work and thank u for reblogging cursed big bird fanarts :)

Before you read, head's up. There will be mentions of dark content:

animal abuse, manipulation, possessive behavior, and of course, a yandere

I don't intend to lighten certain aspects of these things, so do take heed.

Extra: Project Moon said it's up to our interpretation what the Shepherd's gender is, and considering they are based on the Boy Who Cried Wolf, I imagine they are male (or at the very least, more masculine in form). I'm not sure if that means it is up to the reader's decision to choose what to refer to them as, but for the sake of simplicity, I just refer to this Abnormality as he/him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

⸸ F-01-?? (The Blue-Smocked Shepherd) -- Yandere Headcanons ⸸

"I spy with my little eye a lil lamb talking to a big, bad wolf. Do you think I lie when I say you shouldn't trust anyone in this place?"

The Shepherd was, and always had been, untrustworthy. His truths will always be twisted, doubled in meaning to the point of being incomprehensible. But the moment he is being honest, be afraid.

The Shepherd will make you understand that lies are often better than the truth.

⸸ On the grand scheme of things, nothing would change. Everyone knows how terrible he is in canon, and that much still applies to him as a yandere.

⸸ He would still be a dog abuser and a liar, and he would still find joy disregarding the feelings of others.

⸸ But once his possessiveness finally reveals itself, that is when you'll realize just how good of a liar he can be when he really tries. Because chances are, you wouldn't even know what this Abnormality is thinking.

⸸ You will perpetually feel as if he is playing some sort of mind game with you--because he is. But this would be different from his usual ones. Rather than warning you of breaches, he is...conversing with you. Or at least, that's what it seems like on the surface, but of course, nothing good ever comes from talking with him.

⸸ What may seem like innocent questions about your day will lead to insults disguised as teasing comments, which then lead to him somehow tearing down your self-esteem.

⸸ Another facet I find interesting about the Shepherd is his absurd level of awareness over the other Abnormalities. Because of it, I imagine he would be one of the very few with a high level of lucidity.

⸸ He would be far from being delusional, and it is his mental clarity that would make him so, so terrifying to go against.

You could easily fool a delusional puppy into listening to you with the right words and actions...but how would you convince someone who knows you hate them...but simply doesn't care?

⸸ The Shepherd, being the guardian of the flock that he claims to be, would know everything about his Darling's routine. He would know where you are, what you are and will be doing, and which Abnormality you will work on. Nothing you do can be kept a secret from the him.

⸸ He wouldn't care if you worked on most Abnormalities. Most of them are pathetic or pitiful, anyway, and none of them could ever attain the same attention (paranoia) and deep feelings (hatred) you hold for him.

⸸ But heavens forbid if you pay any sort of attention on that sorry excuse of a wolf, that stupid dog that cannot even decide or do anything for itself.

⸸ It doesn't deserve your care and affection. That idiot is already beyond saving. It cannot even die. Why waste your breath?

⸸ Rather fortunate that you have...what was it you called it, a 'heart'? That very same thing you are proud of, the Shepherd will use against you. I hope you can stand to see your precious little buddy massacring down the entire facility.

~~~ End ~~~

Message to Anon: Hehe, I'm happy to know someone loves these cursed gems as much as I do. And if you have read this far, I would like to just say that I am very happy to see you hanging around, Anon! I'd love to see you stick around for more! Feel free to send requests for whomever or simply just to stop by and share. I'm just...obsessed with Project Moon...