#i think it was like? some dumb shit about it being educational? idk it really Wasnt and most importantly that was The Only Time

[toytulini]

Why did you have to read Ben Carson's book to get access to the twilight books? What was stopping you from just getting the twilight books? I'm confused and curious

BKGDJWVIVE oh my god i just saw this sorry. my mom made me read the ben carson book before she was willing to buy me the last 2 books while i was in middle school. it was dumb but in retrospect its so ridiculous its funny.

[fairydares]

loook i get why the idea of riding the "anti/pro" fandom disk horse makes people gag a little in their mouth and try to opt out entirely, but here's why i went from feeling exactly the same way to taking a firm profiction stance. I've been meaning to make this post for a while.

~10 years ago, I posted a fic for the first time and it got its own harassment campaign. The fic wasn't even sexual, and wasn't going to be (it remains incomplete). It was accurately rated T on fanfiction.net. Anyone in the Fairy Tail fandom will understand this: I literally got harassed for writing a "Lucy leaves the guild" fic💀.

After many nice comments, someone left a pretty nasty one. Hurt, I messaged them back. They acted super attacked that I'd responded (lmao) and after we argued, threatened to "rip my shitty story apart in the comments section" if I responded again. I told them "go ahead lol."

They went ahead.

Now know that it was a relatively small harassment campaign, but at the time, it was devastating. Right around then, I wound up in the hospital. After I got out, I went to excitedly check my fic, and found several reviews saying things I wouldn't repeat to my worst enemy. I was suicide-baited more than once, told "thank fuck you finally abandoned this shitty story, dumb cunt," stuff like that.

There were several accounts involved, and I can't say for sure, but I suspect at least a couple different people were involved, though probably at least half of it was one person.

All the other comments were screeching about how I hadn't updated, mostly. "NO UPDAAATEE WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPENS TO MEEEE??!!!" was one that stood out after I'd been miserable in a hospital for an extended period of time.

Idk what people think is going on when FT fic authors write this trope, and frankly I don't give a fuck. Because while I was partly writing the story out of some young, cringe feminist rage, I also did genuinely have a real story I was compelled to tell. I was inspired by another, popular fic I loved which used the trope to talk about how trying to shoulder our burdens alone really just hurts both ourselves and everyone who cares about us.

My own story was ultimately going to have similar themes, with more focus on strength, what it means, and in what contexts earning and having it actually matters. In retrospect, no wonder I wound up in hot water, because at the time "Lucy vs. Strength vs. Misogyny" was the FT fandom's Designated Nonsensically Activist Debate™. But that's partly why i wanted to write about it; engaging with the fandom had gotten me thinking about it 🤷‍♂️

Not too long after that, FFNet oh-so-benevolently granted us the ability to delete comments from our own stories (they never took my reports seriously at all, afaik). I deleted all or most of the harassers' comments (may still be a one or two up, and i'm fairly sure there's a couple comments defending my fic from the harassment) without saving screenshots, which I really regret now. I was just so mortified and full of self-loathing about the whole thing that i wanted to forget it completely. Something that had brought me joy at a very lonely, vulnerable period of my life had turned so negative, and i couldn't even tell the people closest to me about it without being made fun of for writing anime fan fiction.

I didn't understand why this happened at the time, but--after a period of trying to forget/bid out of it all with a slight anti lean (a common approach I see people use, and one which I'm not proud of adopting)--I just had to figure out What the Fuck Even Happened There. And I'm telling you, after years of reflecting, wrestling with both sides, and educating myself, that this "status quo of harassment" culture which pervades fandom goes way deeper than you think and comes out of a way darker well than you probably realize. An astonishing amount of this is, quite literally, TERF shit and evangelical shit.

Trying to be in fandom and take a stance of, "Anti/Pro shit? Ew, I'm Not Touching that," is like swimming in a heavily polluted river and being like, "Poison? Cringe. Not me lol."

You might be lucky enough to be in a less-polluted part of the river (AKA a relatively non-toxic fandom, in which case good for you!)...but tbh this rhetoric and peer-signalling will still seep in.

I can't stress enough that pro-fiction, AKA "proship", is the normal, leftist-about-art-and-sex opinion. Pro-ship is against all the horrible things you're against; in fact, pro-ship isn't trivializing real trauma by equating it with fictional trauma, or trying to apply literal evangelical/radfem solutions--which are proven not to prevent or help. Profiction/proship is literally just saying, "Fiction is fiction, reality is reality, and the two don't have a 1:1 relationship. And historically, trying to censor just things we've decided are bad has done nothing but get LGBTQ+ and POCs censored. Therefore, depictions of illegal things shouldn't be censored." That's it. "Proshippers all ship problematic ships," is a brazen lie. Many of them share other fans' disgust for those ships, they just don't believe in censoring fic authors over it.

It is also taking a stand against harassment because--and I hope my own story has helped drive this home--as with all groups who adopt ingroup/outgroup thinking, antis are defined by their tactics, not actual stances on real, serious issues. What happened to me was absolutely a result of anti, "it's okay to 'bully out' anything I just don't like" mindset pervading fandom. In a way, this was the mindset's final form. They didn't even feel the need to cite a reason the trope was "bad" or "wrong"; it annoyed them, and they viewed their own feelings as a valid enough pathway for policing to go right ahead and do so.

In the interest of offering solutions instead of just bitching about problems, I might make a "how to know if you've bought into these types of views"-type post sometime. Also might come back to this and provide some sources/citation.

[hazbin-critique-place]

THINGS I HATE ABOUT THE THE APOLOGY TOUR (part 1)

Blitzo just randomly walks in. AND DON'T GET ME WRONG, I LOVE HIM, HE'S LITERALLY THE CLOSES THING TO MY COPING MECHANISMS IRL AND PEOPLE HAVE DESCRIBED ME THE SAME WAY AS HIM, I'M NOT SHITTING ON HIM, but rather the storytelling... Like... What??? Like, make it make sense.

So he just randomly comes and goes, as he wishes??? And we saw he didn't have any problems with stealing (maybe just felt bad a bit but come on he kills ppl for living and we see how sadistic he can be he's NOT gonna have problem with that) why doesn't just steal from Stolas' house and sell that shit????? Like - he could fucking quit his job or find a better one!!!

And then he wouldn't need the grimoire, and... Boom.

Then, why is he even there??? Like - did he use his brains at all?? Like - bruv, you got rhe crystal already, so if you wanna act like you don't give a shit... Just don't come pleading to him (bird dick guy) and basically annoy the shit out of him for next 10 minutes even if you're right. Trust me, that's not how you feign nonshalance. I would know.

Stolas being sassy at him, then??? Like - if you have the guts to be sassy, why don't even have the whole conversation wuth him and sit and talk the relationship out with each other already??? Are you THAT stubborn?! That's not normal.

Also, if you really don't want him there, Stolas, just teleport him out. Or yourself. Just - fucking make it make sense. You HAVE the powers, and I KNOW that in Good Omens Crowley and Az would in this situation probably forget that, Neil even speaks about it in some interview or idk, but... Come on. HE'S SMART. STOLAS LITERALLY READS. (I know this is stereotyping but there IS a reason for the stereotype - literally a majority of people who'd read in their free time (and c'mon, even I, an ao3 monster, wouldn't read after such a fight like Sto and Blitz had - my anxiety would be making scenarios and pacing through the garden already -) ARE smart.) Don't make him look all educated and priviledged and informated and shit just to act like this mean asshole, like - does he ENJOY annoying Blitzo back??? (Also, pls shut, you twitter users who "dOn'T dEaDnAmE hiM!!!1!" all over reasonable posts when you lack better arguments. It literally IS his legal name, and if he had such a problem with it, he could change it easily... Take Anthony to Angel Dust, after all. Or just nicknames could work.) Bcs I at this point honestly think he does.

Also, you dumb, dumb, hypocritical bird, why would you show him a fucking invite when you could just repeatedly tell him to at least 'go away' or just act objectively reasonable????

And if you're trying to be so polite bro, just magic him a cup of tea, or something, to match the yours. It would nicely fit to the scene and aesthetic, also it would make you seem more nice and classy... At least I could like you.

Also, are you ignoring Blitzo or fuck¥ng talking to him???

Because at the same time, you want to have an alone time, but you still throw baits to elarge the conversation at him.

He's all sassy and makes comments and aaahhh - so you're like satisfied with the situation now or what???

I mean, poor Blitzo -

Like-

If you hate him, just tell it to him already. Poor boy.

Oh god, we aren't even 3 minutes in and I have already writen a goddamn novel.

Also, I know it's supposed to be funny, but the whole party idea is honestly just dumb. Like... I would be so bored and not even excited to even go to a place designated to constantly talk about a person I hate? Lol

Like I love a good gossip but not as a theme for a goddamn concert-having function!

Also, you know that happy people live longer, right? This is kinda unhealthy - I mean, that's just basic, no? Like don't support and feed your hatred towards an individual just to feel better about yourself, or at least don't force it.

Bcs I get the guy who broke down crying at that one shot after he tried to hit the blitzi plush so much. And the other dude was hyping him up. I'd be so much confused, like him. Like - he's going through some hard stiff, like some facking serious character development right now, just let him be!

About Martha... Ehhh, I love her new design and character, but it just seems boring and soul sucking now that every character, after they're denonised, they just happened to be the same, most generic, and shitty snappy, constantly angry and always frustrated (and frustrating) characters ever. Like - does hell really that much brainwash people??? I mean, it would be interesting, but honestly I don't think that Vivzie did this intentionally at all.

Also, why would you even sleep with your nemesys... 😭 I'm a number one enemies to lovers fan and I don't ship it if they don't bite rach other but this, especially so unexplored and just randomly thrown in, does NOT make and sense.

It was funny though lol. I want more of these just to see how much Viv's one-dimensional view of her own fucking characters transforming to hell changes.

Part 2 soon.

[astralnymphh]

I just got on and saw what’s been happening and bro…I’m glad people are talking about it. Mostly about the smut, inclusivity, Palestine, and the fetishization of trans people.

Reading smut is so underwhelming like it seems like that’s all what people write these days. Like I need ANGST! I need to CRY! I need SLOW BURN AND PLOT….

And to be honest, I personally feel like some writers purposely list the reader’s physical descriptions as being white… like damn you know multiple people are going to come across your shit. I would get annoyed asf when I see something like “she touched your soft pale flushed skin” BITCH- 💀 don’t piss me off 😒🦶🏽

I won’t speak too in depth about the fetishization of trans people in fanfics because I’m not trans and I don’t want to say anything inaccurate BUT I will say it’s so disturbing and off putting seeing shit like that and seeing how people are sexualizing trans people more than treating them like regular humans…I also came across that ‘femcel’ series and🧍🏽‍♀️erm… no.

I appreciate the account who made the post discussing how the word trans and the f word are completely different. I didn’t even know that word was derogatory and it shocked me... I hope that account takes it down and they educate themselves or something cause 🙁👎🏽

yes pook YES smut can be underwhelming and so overdone. we definitely need more angst/fluff.. or just PLOT in general. no, i'm not saying don't write it at all (incase anons twist my words, cause.. they're good at that.) i'm just saying that it would be nice to see some fully fleshed out pieces with emotion and storytelling. i have something in the works though, that encompasses all genres (fluff/smut/angst) so, there's that!

people will so clearly write the whole petite pale white girl bs like "ur delicate small hand" or the fuckass "doey eyed and blushing cherub red" like NEVER portray reader so specifically unless you're going to specify it in the cw!!!! do whatever for ellie's white ass but for the love of gods and goddess BE AWARE OF READER AS A SPOT TO FILL, NOT AN OC!!!! idk how else to describe what i just said. but. it is said. so it. yeah. that whole delicate small petite thing kinda trickles into writing childlike readers too but. thats a whole nother discussion. no clue if i ever used that phrasing in the past tho i have no bold memories of my writings in detail.

i think people will listen to anybody but trans people who are actively calling it fetishization, like. all the mfs arguing with them say "trans and f💀ta aren't the same!" yeah. they aren't. cause one is like, a genuine, flesh and bone person.. with a whole story.. and feelings.. and experiences.. and one is.. fetishization. how many times do trans people have to repeat that? bet most of the people trying to argue against it aren't even trans.

the whole thing about authors "flooding" the tlou tag with palestine posts is also dumb as fuck. is scrolling a bit too taxing on your poor smut-guzzling thumbs?? ur scrolling over big booty fics, i think you can scroll a little further past those posts if you're really that much of a basement dwelling fuck that's sitting comfortably in their homes while a genocide is happening. out here sobbing cause people are spreading awareness. eat my bum bum booty. ++ also add-on cause we're holding writers accountable for ignoring a strike (different than not knowing at first) but there's also the artists!! they're there too.

anons r gonna come into my inbox abt all this but i'm not even gonna answer like, don't waste your time. im not reading all that. especially coming from an ANON 💀

me when

[firefistjaigio]

OP social media headcanons (only some lol)

thinked too hard about what some OP characters social media use would be like

The Strawhats:

Luffy: avid IG reels and Youtube shorts user, they do not let his ass on tik tok. He posts random shit he sees on his IG story and also makes reels about beetles. He begs Usopp to help him make a YouTube channel but Usopp will do most of the work for it so he's not fully on board yet

Chopper: Gen Alpha realness he is crazy about Roblox, they don't really let him have his own account but he look at reels and shorts with Luffy

Zoro: Literally nothing but youtube to watch workout, sword, martial art, fitness, and like some eastern philosophy motivational content. Nami also downloaded a locator app on his phone so the strawhats can find him and stop him from wandering to another country. Oh and he tried google maps, fucking hated it

Sanji: He is sharing flowery good morning gifs on whatsapp and facebook all the time. He runs the account for the baratie on Instagram and it's actually pretty savvy but also real. Oh and he's on Snapchat for loser reasons

Nami: Gen Z legend, she is PROLIFIC. Makes really cool tik toks about navigation and is lowkey an educational influencer. Also is on Instagram and is somewhat villainous on Twitter with Usopp. Scams people on Discord

Usopp: Lord he is on everything. He will demolish you on Twitter, Nami helps, he has doxxed evil bitches with her help. He's evil in IG reel comment sections but not like that bad. Oh and he posts pretty cool stuff on tik tok and Ig reels about all the stuff he makes, everyone always hypes his art. Oh and like he's probably always just looking for tips on Reddit and sharing answers too

Robin: Tumblr most definitely, archeology and history blog on tumblr

Franky: Runs a facebook account and instagram account for his mechanic? woodworking, robotics just whatever the fuck shop, we love him for it.

Jinbei: Facebook mom, also shares dumb stuff he sees on facebook to the others on whatsapp

Brook: Also just nefarious on Facebook but Usopp helped him open an account to post music, has a following from people who were fans of him back in the day and also just music fans.

This isn't a me post if I don't talk about the ASL brothers sighs

So the brothers overall have a childhood youtube channel with vlogs they would post of their shenanigans, has a lot of of fun and crazy stuff on there. They kept it all out of fondness for the memories.

Sabo: Lord... he is on political twiter bullying THE FUCK out of right wingers. He is practically everywhere, he runs a tik tok account for political organizing and education that Koala also runs with him. He has used tumblr, but not really much. He has an Instagram he mostly neglects for being crazy and discussing theory on Twitter. He goes on Discord sometimes but the modern au version of the revolutionary army shed that for Signal I guess. Sabo is also on bluesky, idk what goes on there though.

Ace: mostly offline, justs uses Whatsapp to chat with his people yeah.

I'm gonna add Law to this post too because bye

Law: LinkedIn... ew... and twitter but like in a stressed way like he just scrolls on it and just tweets about his life.

[bisexualseraphim]

People around my age thinking being 30+ is “old” or “cringe” is whacky to me because like… I for one actually can’t wait to be in my 30s.

My experience of being in my 20s hasn’t been the most pleasant. Due to circumstances out of my control, primarily brought on by the pandemic, I haven’t made it as far in life at my age as many of my peers. I finished college, had the odd temporary job or apprenticeship and then… that’s kind of been it. I haven’t been in work or education for the last almost 4 years and I feel like total shit for it. I also don’t really enjoy clubbing or getting drunk, and I find that many people I try to make friends or get into relationships with have no sense of commitment or permanence. Everyone my own age wants everything to go FAST FAST FAST and you’re looked down upon if you just want to relax and slow down for a minute. Your 20s are supposed to be for getting ahead and being a dumb youth after all!

People in their 30s and older, however (and I hope I don’t sound like I’m indirectly calling them old here lol) tend to be a bit more relaxed about these kinds of things. Chances are they’ve had some actual life experience that has made them more mature, and they’ve realised that there’s no need to rush anything. You’re going to (hopefully) live for 70 years or so; what’s the rush to get everything done right now? At 30 and older, maybe you’ve gone through a couple of jobs, experienced living alone, made and lost a few friends, had a relationship or two, maybe you’ve even gone back to school just because you can — and even if you haven’t, who fucking cares? Life isn’t a competition. Trying to rush anything is only going to guarantee that you have regrets.

As such, I don’t feel as much social pressure, if any at all, around people aged 30+. They don’t look down on me for not having made as much progress as I wanted to. All they tell me is “you’ll get there when you get there, there’s no rush or pressure to do anything” and that is honestly so much more freeing than hanging around people younger than me who have already had 3 jobs, 2 houses and a date for their wedding. I love having friends in their 30s and 40s. They make me feel safe and content with myself.

This isn’t me trying to be like “I’m not like other kids in their 20s… I hate anyone born after 1995 😎” I just mean that shitting on people older than you simply for being “old” is the REAL cringe lol seeing as they’ve been your age and likely know a thing or two about life better than you do. They could help guide you through your obstacles and instead you’re teasing them for idk, using the 😂 emoji or something. Not to mention the fact 30 is considered “old” now is highly concerning…

All I mean is, yes, you do owe other people the absolute most bare minimum kindness and respect and that does, in fact, include your elders. Stop calling people who are still pretty young “old” please

[dootznbootz]

hello, sorry it's me again, you've basically become my comfort blog-

I was on reddit and out of curiosity typed in "Circe rant" because idk, I was feeling salty about the book.

I saw a post that had some legitimately good reasons and indicated that this is all just the person's opinion.

But when I checked the replies everyone was just disagreeing with them and being very rude?

Like, they complained about how the book doesn't feel feministic because Circe isn't that likable of a character? And then half the replies were "Uhh she's supposed to be morally gray" "I disagree, Madeline told her story very well." "What gave you the impression this book was supposed to be feministic??"

(Disregarding half the reviews on the cover are calling it a "great feministic piece")

I was kinda pissed so I went to post my own thought about why I really dislike Miller's take on Circe. And 80 present of the replies were just flaming me-

Some guy said people can interpret her anyway they want because she's not real. Someone said I should be more humble and that I just don't like Circe as a character (which is not true). And so on.

Something I've seen is that the Circe book fans are so sensitive good god- Whenever someone criticizes their book they go full defensive mode. Trying to reason with you when most of the time you're the one who actually knows more about the actual character-

They act like all of our concerns on the book actually have a reason and make sense? Honestly, props to us for being bold enough to voice our concerns on a book that basically has a cult following-

Again, really sorry for coming here to bother you. I'm just salty and I genuinely really like your takes

That's really sweet that you feel safe and comfy on my blog. That's what I'm trying to be. Thank you 🥹

You're not bothering me <3 I can understand being salty about the book. It makes me salty too. It's why it's honestly good to block the tags and avoid most of that stuff. Make friends and find the community that actually understand what actually went down in the Odyssey and what happened to Odysseus. There are plenty on here! :D Also quite a few who have really neat and fun stuff about Odyssey Circe while still being respectful of Odysseus!

I don't recommend trying to fight with these folks. It's frustrating but they're not gonna change their mind. As they don't want to. Inform and educate sometimes especially if people ask but don't waste so much energy on it. It's not good for you. It's okay to vent and rant but I don't recommend searching it out. <3 You'll just stress yourself out :D

I think the book is almost like, the most "basic angry feminist shlock in a bland and easy to consume can for pre-teens" book, you know? And that's why so many people cling to it. I can see SOME people taking comfort in the anger maybe?? But idk. Anyways it has so many classic "YA shit". Girlboss who has "no flaws and can do no wrong" who actually isn't a very nice person (what's with so many characters being so mean and moody???), the mean, MEAN men who are just soooo awful to her and try to push her down. The other women who are just slutty and so dumb. They don't get it. etc. etc.

I think it's a lot of younger fans who are JUST starting to see a lot of "adult shit" and it's scary so it's nice to have...idk this?? I don't understand it. As I was never really one to be into that or really even behave that way. Odysseus is much relatable and hopeful as insane as that is.

[vohtaro]

to the anon who sent me an ask recommending i read the da vinci code: sorry tumblr ate your ask. i do hope you see this.

so here it is. my da vinci code book review.

well, that was... a book.

context: while i have seen the movie 'angels & demons' like seventeen billion times bc it was on tv all the time, i have only seen the da vinci code once, probably around when it came out. i feel it safe to say that i was fairly fresh on the material. i listened to it on audiobook over the course of 3 weeks bc that's what was available soonest from my library.

i can start by saying... i get why this book was popular. you have conspiracy, "the church is hiding a truth!" drama, little puzzles that chock themselves up far beyond their merit... selling the idea that every symbol, every story, is somehow this secret tapestry that all cultures across the world are metaphorically shaking hands on... yeah. it's the kind of book that someone reads and gets the chat about at dinner parties and end on, "well, you never know, it could be true!". the chapters are short, too, which is amazing given the amount of entirely unnecessary detail stuffed into them.

brown's writing style is at times deeply insufferable. most times it's mundane, but his descriptors are damn painful at times. the detail he provides are either entirely unnecessary and add nothing, or are so far beyond what anyone cares about. but i think the worst offense of his writing is the air of smugness that it carries. the obnoxious quips about hollywood, the students he was lecturing at whatever school, his general internal monologue; there were these little remarks that i could just feel that when dan brown wrote them, he paused from his typing to give himself a cheeky little pat on the back. "I showed them," he chortled to himself, wiggling in his chair. "gave them a good smarting, I did!". it feels like brown has a Big Thought about some utterly minuscule thing that absolutely does not matter, but if he doesn't say it, he'll fckin explode.

as someone who has no serious religious background/education, i found the entire "secret"... rather underwhelming. i struggle to imagine that the entire world would be torn asunder because jesus fucked that one time. and not to mention, the idea of a direct bloodline from jesus being so vital for ??? some reason that i don't even recall was explained, felt so... bizarre?? just entirely strange. like, i don't know why the existence of a direct descendant of jesus christ would be so fundamental in the destruction of a multi-thousand year long faith, but sure. pop off, dan brown. and no, i really don't want anyone to explain it to me.

robert as a character is very. idk. he's inoffensive, ig. his character suffers by being a product of brown's desire to mic drop once in a while. i'm sure robert said some dumb shit that i forgot about, but he's really just some guy talking out of his ass with a bit too much confidence. he's not intentionally rude or anything. it's hard to describe him bc he's just A Guy who knows shit about pictures. he's a picture guy. Professor Picture. idk if he's a professor.

sophie meanwhile is a character whose purpose is being by-association rather than being a person with her own agency. she is important because she knew jacques and solved his riddles and puzzles as a child; not because of her own professional merits. she solves like three things at the beginning, all of them being word puzzles and then the fibonacci sequence password at the bank. otherwise, she is someone who gets upset about her late grandfather for a plethora of different reasons. not unreasonable of her, given just how much she uncovers in the span of 36 hours, but that's really where her character ends. at times, she is forward, perhaps even brazen with her determination, which i did appreciate. at the start of the story, she's actually moving the plot along quite a bit: she gives robert the clue via the phone message; she breaks the window in the bathroom and throws the tracker too iirc; she's driving during the car chase, helping robert escape (in her hashtag not sponsored Smart Car). but after that..... it feels like she's just along for the ride. i feel like she could have been more instrumental as time went on.

and speaking of sophie.... i could entirely feel the way that stupid romantic subplot was being shoved in between robert and sophie because some editor demanded it. it was so fucking brutal. their little """moment""" outside the house before robert left for paris the next morning had my fingers leaving impressions in the steering wheel.

the worst puzzle had to be the isaac newton one bc as soon as newton was mentioned i was like "apple. it's apple." and it took an UNGODLY amount of pages for anyone to piece it together. literally how did it take THAT FUCKING LONG. i was yelling in my vehicle and incurring road rage over it. APPLE!!! JUST GUESS IT!!! IT'S NOT LIKE THE CRYPTEX WILL LOCK IF YOU GUESS TOO MANY TIMES!!!! COME AWNNNN!!!

so anyways, thanks for recommending it. it sure was a trip. though given that you suggested this on anon, perhaps i should say 'how could you' since you knew what this book could do to a man. /lh

if you have any specific questions for me about impressions or thoughts regarding something i did not mention, feel free to ask; it's very possible that i just forgot to mention it.

[onlyplatonicirl]

henlo it is i the headcANON, here to go ramble about everyone's favourite little guy, casey. its insane to me just how much you've endeared me and many other tcoti fans to this silly fella

i can see casey going to a religious school (the only difference from a non religious school is you learn re but literally no one cares lol), most parents will try and send their kids there cause they are known for being better schools (they get more funding for extra lessons), and casey couldnt give less of a shit about it

i also think he wouldve went to an all boys school, he just sorts acts like he did lol

whilst in school my man would try and break every single dress code policy known to man, half of the time hed just show up in his pe clothes, the other time hed show up with no tie, no jacket, a coat and whatever else he could fet his hands on that he wasnt supposed to have (english schools have really strict dress codes, idk why its dumb)

he knows a small amount of spanish, in most british schools you are forced to do mfl (modern foreign languages) and its usually either french or spanish (you rarely have a choice to pick which you want to do), some will let you pick up german and even mandarin but thats usually at gcse level or as an extracurricular activity (which most kids are also forced to do). he isnt fluent in spanish, not by a long shot, but he definitely knows how to have a conversation, albeit very scripted and short. however, one thing he does understand is how to swear in spanish, and what it sounds like. i imagine him and his friends just looking it up on the laptops during class time, definitely to annoy their teacher.

so i have this image in my head that gray doesnt like swearing all that much (maybe fresh got to him lol), so he tends to swear in spanish or french because the british boy wont understand - alas he does

casey could not be arsed with most lessons because he didnt really care about getting a good education since he couldnt see all that bright of a future for himself, if one at all, but he was actually quite good at maths and history, even when he tried not to be

he has been shown on more than one occasion, undernovella, and whilst he was put off it due to it 1. being in spanish, and 2. the cast being played 99% by monsters, he actually really ended up enjoying it by the end

hes also been getting into anime and manga ("dude its like a comic book but even more brutal"), mostly shonen like one punch man and dragon ball, but he also really enjoyed sailor moon and doesnt want to admit to it, he liked the romance and friendship aspect of it, also pretty girls

he has always been into comic books, his favourite super heroes are deadpool and spiderman

before he met gray (properly), he mostly played shooter games (ones that were free or cheap), fortnite, valorant, and a pirated copy of fifa, because thats what guys play. if his past self saw his year 4 stardew valley save file, hed spontaneously combust

i think he also plays splatoon now, he mains the dualies because theyre cool, hed definitely be an inkling as well but thats an au for another day

zelda too

despite everything thats happened, he really did grow to love his last foster mum, she was a single lady and she treated him like her own son. hes had bad experiences with the foster care system in the past (breaking news: fork found in kitchen), parents only taking him in for the money, some wanting to complete their family and forcing him to live by their ideals, all that bad stuff, which is why he often ran away from them. he had run away from his last foster mum, two times before, but it was very early into their relationship before they got to understand each other better.

his last foster mum asked him what his hobbies were his first night at her house, he didnt know, so she suggested he pick up an instrument - he decided the guitar, because it looked cool. he almost cried when she offered to buy him lessons, he didnt take her up on the offer, determined to learn it by himself, and he did

he has a really nice singing voice he'll never let anyone see - hes a lyric baritone

also whilst in canon hes a brummie, i like to imagine he was born a bit further north (hes a mackem to me), and moved to birmingham to be with his most recent and last foster parent, and that he lived there for so long thats hes picked up the accent

he felt really bad leaving her but managed to convincr himself that she would be better off without someone like him in her life

casey is a very traumatised child, he has a lot of triggers and boundaries he doesnt fully understand himself, plus a boat load of unhealthy coping mechanisms (mainly smoking and socially isolating himself)

he tries to keep his bad habits a secret from gray, because he doesnt know how he would feel about it - he knows, he doesnt like it but he isnt exaclty the greatest at having healthy coping mechanisms himself, at the very least he tries to get him to swap one for another, instead of smoking play stardew valley with me for 37 hours straight :) ?

he often struggles with the idea that hes a burden, so he doesnt let people spend money on him, or give him gifts

he also struggles to express his emotions (hes british unfortunately), and has a hard time saying 'i love you' to anyone, the only person he never strugfled saying that to was his mum

bit of a trigger warning, im going to be talking about casey's injuries and all that jazz, so if you dont wanna read, head to the next bullet point! casey shouldnt be alive, the injuries he suffered were severe, the paramedics were convicned he was a lost cause (still they have to do everything they can), so it was a shock to all when he pulled through. this was, however, not without a bit of a battle, and it left permanent effects on his health. casey's lungs are horribly scarred (smoke inhalation will do that to you), and it doesnt help that he smoked before and after. his nerves on the left side of his body where the support beam collapsed on him, are quite literally fried. where it hit directly, he cannot feel anything there, the areas that were dames by the fire however are unbelievably sensitive and painful to the touch. even after the scar healed it stills remains sensitive, so he bandages up those areas. the beam also broke and bruised a lot of his bones, mostly his ribs and the bones in his arms. his left ear is also burnt, and a portion of it, mostly the tips of it, are straight up missing. after recovering from the initial injury, he had a skin graft taken from his right thigh to supplement the damage done to the left side of his face. for a while after he had to take a lot of pain meds, and undergo a ton of therapy both mental and physical - even still hes not fully healed

casey loves animals, particularly dogs. his last foster mother had a german shepherd, and he used to let it sleep on his bed. it made him feel safe and loved. dogs and cats also just like to come up to him on the street, bros a disney princess for real

beefed with paperjam for a while, both had a lack of trust in each other, but they got to be on equal ground after a while, that didnt last long, not since after chapter 31..

hes fighting demons (bisexuality)

ever since he met gray and by extension his wack ass family, hes grown more and more accustomed to monster culture, particularly their disregard for gender norms and compulsive heterosexuality, and hes been experimenting with his gender expression, he never thought hed actually enjoy dressing in pink or taking care of his hair. he tried painting his nails, but did not have the patience to let them dry, he still sometimes wears it, albeit chipped and blotchy, but he thinks it suits him

he has always been fine with being labelled a man, but sometimes he doesnt feel as though it fits him, not entirely, hes not sure what his gender is because sometimes male really does fit him, but other times he just wants to throw the whole concept of gender away, hes stuck with unlabelled for a while and feels as though it somewhat fits him

he once buzzed his hair cause all the guys in his school did for whatever reason, he cried for several hours afterwards and got nicknamed sampson for a week, biggest mistake of his life - bro experienced dysphoria for the first time in his life

celebrates gyftmas because its way cooler than christmas (I NEED A GRACEY GYFTMAS ONESHOT ASAP), he celebrates the majority of monster holidays since everyone (1 to 2 people at max lmao) in the house he currently lives in does too. is confused as to what monster halloween is supposed to be

likes going out with gray (which is once in a blue moon), his favourite spot is waterfall, but he also really likes snowden and hotland

- headcANON

Holy shit HEADCANON I AM EATING SO WELL

Also I hope you don’t mind me tagging @ottererpop because they’re a Casey enthusiast as well and they must see all of this solid gold.

I Must respond to some of these AAA

- I talked with multiple people about how Casey is ABSOLUTELY breaking every dress code he possibly can. Like he would come to school in the bare minimum to not get expelled but his “uniform” would just be wrinkled to hell and his tie would just hang around his neck completely untied

- Casey is genuinely intelligent and if he actually tried in school he would do really well. However he’s a massive shithead and doesn’t care because of how depressed he is

- I do have a very specific speech pattern and tone of voice for him in my head but I’m not sure exactly how to write it. Also about him being from Birmingham - he’s not really from the main city itself but more generally around that area, so he very well could lived farther north and end up closer to the main city has he went to live with foster parents. Im purposefully avoiding getting too detailed with exact places and cities because then it just becomes hyper-specific.

- he absolutely would love undernovella - he love sitcoms so he would adore those over-dramatic plot twists

- He and his current foster mom (before he left ofc) have a tolerable relationship. She was often gone from the house and left him to his own devices, so he would mostly just skip school and play games on his computer all day, which did annoy her significantly.

- his smoking is partially a coping mechanism, partially a peer pressure “cool guy” thing that he picked up, and partially something that could very subtlety equate to self-harm. I could get into a whole thing about his smoking habits. He doesn’t smoke that often, but it is definitely something he tries to hide from Gray. Or at least not make it obvious. Like I said recently PJ has caught him smoking cigs over the kitchen sink while Gray’s been asleep.

- you are correct in your assumption that he doesn’t feel anything on the part of his torso that was severely burnt.

- I’m sure he has shaved all his hair off at some point. In the past he for-sure had one of those haircuts that’s short and buzzed all on the sides but long on the top, or at least buzzed in the back.

- gray’s family and the entire omega timeline being extremely unlabeled when it comes to gender and sexuality, like it’s not a big deal in the slightest, is definitely a massive change for Casey and he struggles to understand it. He’s grown up in an environment where he’s constantly felt like he has to prove how tough and unfeeling he is in order to get ahead. That’s why he’s so embarrassed of his severe sweet tooth, because he’s scared it comes across as “girly”. He’s by no means sexist but he definitely is over-anxious about not being perceived as “weak”.

- I’m sure he would absolutely adore waterfall :)

[existentialbby]

Sometimes I like to think about the fact that in 1492 Christopher Columbus sailed the ocean blue but like, honestly, that is such a random historical fact that has for reason gained relevancy like it's common knowledge now that the vikings landed in the US before Christopher Columbus and also like uh maybe the literal native Americans hello????? Like just cause everyone in England was too busy fucking inventing new ways to kill eachother to realize like oh shit there's more land over here doesn't mean that the America's were some sort of huge discovery, like why the fuck do I even care that Christopher Columbus existed other than the atrocities he committed being bad. It's not even a particularly relevant history to the America's if you ask me like the colonies sure that's kinda relevant thats when Europeans started to immigrate but idk I think I would have just liked a section that taught native american history. Like the most I ever got was the Thanksgiving speech and even that shit hole lesson was conceived by an ass hat who had no idea what was going on or trying to needlessly dumb it down for me. Very frustrating. I think that sometimes we spend a lot of time trying to dumb things down for kids, and lord believe me I know that some kids out there do totally need it to be dumbed down, but like, nah man immerse them kids in a cultures and educated enviornment so they can grow up and recognize parallels between the lives of people past and their own experiences. There are so many modern examples of happenings in the world that we can look back to history and say "wait, haven't we done this before?" Maybe that's the nature of humanity, to be in an infinite loop of constant fucking up and repeating out mistakes, but I'd really like to believe that we're more than that, that we can truly learn from our past and our mistakes if only we open our hearts to the possibilities. Sometimes, it seems like it's surely too big an ask to be even remotely possible, but such is our burden, the burden to try against that which is impossible. Every day we wake up and face the horrors of our reality, the mundanity of life, and though it may be a struggle, ultimately we do find ourselves doing our little tasks and serving the capitalism gods above us. We do this in spite of our eminent ends. Maybe we don't always recognize that, we choose to not constantly think about how any day can be our last, but it is a fact that we celebrate in many ways. With each passing year we celebrate birthdays, both for the monumenntous occasion of our entering into this cruel and beautiful world, and for a grim but subtle reminder that our time here is but a trial. And sadly, no one knows when it's going to end.

Maybe that's what makes our little lives precious, of course there's all the rest of being a person and Yada Yada Yada, but I find that there is something uniquely human in our determination to face everyday despite the literal hard wall of the inevitable. Often, instead of feeling down, though I have down days too, I feel inspired to create, to pour my heart out into these posts or to write a hilariously bad piece of poetry. That too is a burden in of itself, a constant battle of wanting to outplay my own past experiences, to one up myself in an infinitely scaling tower of incredible mind numbing expository greatness, or to somehow eventually create something so profound that it doesn't just touch your heart, it shatters it. I think it's hard to convey emotion through any medium, how is it possible that great artists can use the forms of music or paint or word to twist us up? How can I surpass their ability to give you an emotional and mental experience like no other? How can I wire to you, directly, the feelings that I have? I want to blow your mind. I really do. But it's hard to constantly reach that level when sometimes all your brains wants to do is be like hehe hehe froggy. So I don't know, there's a lot of things I don't know. Like

The primordial soup right

DNA was just forming

How did that happen? Obviously there's theories but like imagine being there in person to see it. It would probably look like nothing but still, that could be cool. Isn't it scary to think about how we're all nothing but constantly running chemical reactions? Everything including us could be reduced to simple cause and effect. Like, you say bazinga, cause I asked you to and the effect I'd that it would cool I think

B*zinga (derogatory)

[unbecomingsposting]

As someone who literally came over to tumblr bc of the woso twitter toxicity & the amount of hate that Son was getting when they cancelled her, it’s so funny/weird to see people like her on Twitter again. Like they have been on her fucking neck since it happened. It hasn’t mattered how much better she has become as a player post WC to them.

The people that dung up those tweets do not understand that that is how our generation was on social media at that age. Like blatantly making fun of ourselves, doing dumb shit, and not realizing that it might matter one day. Friends followed friends. No one I knew really followed strangers then. You just didn’t think any of it mattered. To act like people are unable to grow into better people post-HS is insane.

yeah i’m around her age and like. i’m not denying that her twitter from 2010 or 2011 doesn’t contain some casual racism and casual xenophobia. and obviously those are not good things to say. but it was also over a decade ago…during a time when these things were not only completely normalized but in fact were things you basically had to say to be considered normal or cool by people your age…for someone that age to not only recognize what they were saying was bad but also to say so out loud would have been extremely surprising and also would have resulted in them being immediately ostracized by every one of their friends. this wasn’t even a white girl thing back then, it was everyone. the indian kids i went to high school with said “that’s so gay.” the white boys made 9/11 jokes. ppl just were not in any way socially conscious and pre-college you’re basically a product of either 1) your parents, who mostly are more conservative than whoever the present generation is or 2) your internet usage.

from 2010-2013 you didn’t…use the internet the way people do now. you were not getting fucking educated on prison abolition or systemic racism or transphobia on 2012 twitter. that’s just not what it was used for in any way. idk. i think it’s all stupid. esp when it’s aimed at someone that the “woke favs” like rose, andi, crystal (which, lol at this point with pierre), lynn, midge, pinoe, christen, tobin all adore. like, they LOVE her. do you think lynn or midge or christen would be like that about her if she was a nasty little racist? no. be fr.

[the1975attheirverybest]

An overview is more than ok!

Hmmmm...I'm trying to think what my process even looks like, hahah. idk if this will even make any sense but here we go

I'm mostly interested in "intimacy" I guess? i think thats usually easier to see in blurbs and one shots than, like, longer things like "Education" or that multi chapter fic. But I genuinely find people really interesting and the idea of a close romantic relationship where both people's flaws, passions, insecurities, all come out is extremely fascinating to me, lmao. A lot of the time it's two people trying to love each other but in completely different ways, and misunderstandings inevitably happen.

Not to get all existential on y'all but like isn't it insane that we are all just...trapped in our own bodies and consciousness. and that love is the only way that we can escape that and exist with/for/alongside someone else? Idk i think thats just so cool. Matty says it more eloquently than me in "Inside Your Mind." it's basically that stuff....

BECAUSE im interested in intimacy I'll usually try to start out with a specific, concrete example. Like, if someone asks for an angst concept where an argument happens, or if im trying to write the next installment of Education, I try not to think about it in terms of genre like "ok time to write angst." instead, I try to think "if an argument were to happen between Matty and someone he loves, what would it be about? what kinds of things would he be unwilling to budge on."

so, like, that last piece I wrote where they argue about the new show etc. That's how that one happened. I couldn't imagine him being legitimately upset about like dinner or laundry or an outing, not enough to start a fight because of it. Idk...he just doesn't strike me as the kind of person who cares THAT MUCH about simple stuff. BUT he does care A WHOLEEE LOT about every tiny detail of his show and chooses everything for a specific reason and with a specific goal in mind. So, if someone were to have an issue with his art, of course it would become an argument, cuz his work is a reflection of himself. And since he's been under fire this year about the limits of irony and some fans online (even here on tumblr, ive legit gotten asks about this) have been like "ugh i hope he doesn't do the whole acting thing again" I imagine thats a legit concern that he has to deal with. So, the more specific the idea is, the more real it feels/ in line with who I think Matty might be, the better it is going to end up.

This is where I struggle the most: im not that great at detail, description, emotion etc. but i find dialogue natural to write. So, usually, my starting point is dialogue. Like, once I had the idea for what I wanted the fight to be about, I imagined Matty in that situation and how he would be a bit sarcastic and say that thing about how hes imagining someone asking him about the new show where he says "oh yeah, its going great! i mean, my missus hates it, but at least Rolling Stone thought it was alright" or whatever. And I start out with that and build the scene around that kind of interaction.

Same with longer plots and stories. Like, I had the idea for Education after we were all talking about inexperienced!Y/N and Matty being patient and teaching her. So thats half the plot. the other half is, again, what I imagine Matty would be like. He's had a few slutty phases recently. And if it were a friend/ non-gf situation im sure he'd be dumb enough (hes a man after all, bless him) to like continue sleeping around. and ive been doing a thing, though im not sure its clear enough for y'all to have noticed lmao, where like, whatever "lesson" he teaches her in bed has a common theme with the plot of the chapter.

Like, for example, the next one is gonna be called "Mistakes are how we learn" or some shit. no spoilers but, thats gonna be the theme of what happens both IN and OUT of the bedroom, so. But again, the plot sorts itself out around the moments that I imagine in their dynamic. Matty's super gentle, physically affectionate, etc. So, while it's not quite the same as romantic intimacy, he is the type to look out for his friends. and we've all seen how comfortable he is with kissing/hugging etc. So, I try to work with that and then expand it to work with what the plot of the chapter is.

I will say that I used to think that getting his "englishness" down to a T would be important cuz i didn't wanna make him sound american. though I have to say, sometimes that shit ends up being so forced and unnatural cuz *i* dont talk like that hahahaha. So, I've stopped trying. It's a hard balance to walk cuz you don't want him to sound like hes from fuckin texas or whatever. but you also dont wanna sound like hes a 56 year old newscaster at the BBC's 6pm news. you know? wish i had better advice on that one.

does any of this make any sense? idk. might be total bullshit. not sure that im the most organized person haha sorryyyy

[rynfinity]

How do you feel about Thai fans being upset/bothered by the newly leaked audio from yesterday and international fans automatically jumping the gun to call Thai people immoral, dumb, that they should educate themselves, calling them two faced and just generally being condescending... when the majority of Thai fans in the quote retweets of that thread were criticizing Build/whomever leaked the audio and just the way the "evidence" was handled

Like, idk, I feel like as an international fan who has to rely on second or even third hand amateur fan translations, I trust the people who have nuance and actually understand the language than the very loud international fanbase who thinks they know shit and they truly, truly don't...

Something something racism something something western superiority complex something something xenophobia

Like I am just appalled at how sure of themselves the international fanbase is of themselves meanwhile the domestic fanbase has at the very least remained neutral to straight up abandoning Build at worst...

Hi, nonny.

I personally think it is a lot harder to really understand what’s going in another country than it is to understand local issues, especially when it’s a country where everything about the issue is in a language that doesn’t always translate easily back and forth from English/the romance languages/etc. There are just too many intermediate layers (do I understand the culture? the fandom customs? the language? is the translator accurate and neutral? does the specific statement have an exact equivalent in my language?) for me to feel comfortable publicly disputing the local fans.

That said, a lot of emotions are clearly still running high on all sides and some folks are not on their best behavior.

All I can do is try not to join them, or amplify their voices.

[daydreaming-in-daisies]

Once again I'm up late because I can't sleep, I have a headache, and I'm still freaking out about potentially not graduating this semester. What else is new lol. Like fucking hell will this trash ass period of my life just fucking END ALREADY????? I swear to God being in school for so long has felt like I'm living in some weird ass time warp. The worst part is seeing people my age who have been out for a few years and have been able to travel, build their own life, and actually exercise their independence. Not experiencing those things and not knowing when I will when I so badly want to is pretty embarrassing. It makes me feel delayed compared to my peers.

I know everyone's life is different and life isn't linear, but damn, at times I still feel like my childish, awkward 18 year old self. I think it's because I've recognized that I made a lot of decisions I wasn't actually ready for back then, and I'm realizing how shitty the consequences of that are now. I definitely picked the wrong major. However, there's no way I could've just not gone to college because what else was I gonna do. I didn't realize that I wanted to do fashion until that introspective period of the pandemic. I didn't realize that it was okay to change my mind about goals I once had and to potentially disappoint others in the process. Idk why exactly, but before then I thought that changing your mind, growing as a person, whatever you wanna call it was bad. Like it just made me "fake" or "indecisive" or something like that.

I was also still pretty heavily into manifesting/LOA/toxic positivity, which back then I didn't have the life experience, maturity, or desire to confront the fact that that was a bunch of bullshit that I was taught and that basing some of my life decisions on what I thought I was going to "attract" was dumb af. I only stopped believing in that pseudo-spiritual, pseudoscientific garbage about a year ago. Which by the way, leaving that cult (yes, it's a cult idgaf) after practically growing up in it was easily one of the most difficult things I did. Because it took me years to actually sit with myself and recognize that this was a belief system that was not only damaging, but also not at all science or reality-based like these fraudulent-ass LOA gurus say it is. That shit had a HUGE influence o on me, as well.

So I guess I don't necessarily feel like I'm still the dumbass teenage/early 20s that I was before, but I definitely feel like I'm forced to live as that person sometimes, because much of my external environment from that time period hasn't changed. I still go to the campus that I did when I was 18, I still have a lot of the same personal items (ex. clothes, school supplies, accessories, etc.) from back then, I still have to center my life around school like I did back then, etc.

That's why I feel so fucking trapped. Idk if I'll finish this semester. I really hope I do, but there's a chance that I'll graduate next semester. I dread having to do this shit for another semester, because I no longer want live as the sad college girl who's constantly losing her damn mind over grades and classes that I won't even use in real life. Tbh my entire educational experience hasn't been that great, and I've realized that academia just isn't for me. It's not an environment I thrive in and that's fine. For years I felt guilty about being one of those people who didn't live up to the "high school/college is the best years of your life!" ideal. But I don't feel that way anymore because I've realized there's more to life outside of those stressful, and quite frankly, OVERRATED years of your life. Like fr having gone through college and being almost finished, I can honestly say it's not a big deal if you didn't particularly like those years. Trying to get a degree while balancing a job, your social life, your health, and your sanity is fucking HARD and from what I've witnessed, damn near an impossible standard. I don't know a single person who had all of that shit together. There were good moments, but I would NEVER revisit this shit ever again.

I have a lot of plans for after I graduate. I plan on starting my own business and revamping some of the stuff I had for it before. I also plan on travelling more often and getting a new job. I'm most definitely throwing away a bunch of my old shit because I don't wanna be reminded of my unsure, awkward college self. I also plan on hanging out with new people and building new relationships, but this time being smarter about who I hang out with lol.

I know this weird lull won't last forever, but sometimes it doesn't feel that way. All I know is that I'm pretty sure that mid 20s, delayed teenage rebellion is probably gonna start after I graduate. Idk how crazy I'm gonna get (it probably won't be that bad lol), but after all of the fuckery I've been through over the years it's most definitely time to get lit fr.

[notebooks-and-laptops]

Okay, so I’ve noticed a theme in posts recently about Izzy Hands that I want to address. I love Izzy as a character (*chefs kiss* to Con O'Neill's portrayal) and also love exploring him. He is (unfortunately) one of my blorbos. But the thing is that

Izzy Hands is homophobic. He’s a queer coded homophobic homosexual - this immediate interpretation of him that was passed around isn’t wrong.

I’ve seen at least 5 posts now saying he isn’t and it’s kind of bizarre to me? He literally is. So I sort of just want to look at some of the reasons people are saying he isn’t. Ultimately, I think the reading that ‘it’s wrong to say Izzy is homophobic’ comes from like. A misunderstanding of all the forms homophobia can take? Or a belief that if you yourself are mlm you can’t be homophobic? 

So one HUGE thing I’ve seen multiple times now is ‘Izzy ignores Pete and doesn’t say anything homophobic to him when he finds Pete and Lucius having sex in Episode 5′. But the fact that Izzy immediately picks on the effeminate gay man and calls him a ‘bitch’ - a pretty damn loaded term in this context - is homophobia. But then why does he ignore Pete? It’s because Izzy’s homophobia is specifically directed towards effeminate gender-non-conforming gay men. Which is a pretty intense form of homophobia, in fact its a wildly common one. ‘I’m okay with someone being homosexual, but I can’t stand all that gay shit’ is like. A huge thing. Do we not remember that dumb meme that was passed around in like 2012 that was all ‘gay people I respect vs. gay people I don’t respect’? 

So yes, Izzy ignores Pete in favour of Lucius, but that’s because Lucius is the kind of gay man Izzy takes issue with. And there’s obviously more to it than that, there’s an important class reading (in an episode which is all about class) in that Lucius represents the most educated member of the crew apart from Stede. But that’s not it in it’s totality because the ‘bitch’ line is RIGHT THERE, and the way that Izzy wants to use Lucius’s open flirting with the crew is RIGHT THERE. 

And Izzy’s hatred of Stede plays into this; Stede is an imbecele, he’s dumb, he’s ridicious, he’s not the right sort of man. Edward when he allows himself to enjoy the things Stede enjoys is also not being the right sort of man. But wanting men to not be openly feminine in some of their hobbies and personality it just...it IS homophobia. 

And Izzy is obviously queer coded. As the show runners said, he has a toxic love for Edward. He gets really close to men and stares at their lips while he argues. Etc. Etc. If Izzy was offered a ‘manly’ no holds bared violent relationship with Ed he wouldn’t have a problem with that at all. If the crew were fucking but like ‘proper pirates’ do (aka calico jack and Ed’s relationship) then Izzy probably wouldn’t have a problem with that either. But just because he doesn’t take issue with mlm relationships in all their forms, that DOESN’T mean he’s not homophobic and denying this part of his character is just...a really weird move in my opinion? And sort of denies him some of the complexities he has? 

Idk if people are doing this because they want to make him more sympathetic, or more ‘blorbo-y’ or if they just genuinely don’t see this kind of behaviour as homophobia but. You can like the character even if he is like this you know that right? In fact, this aspect of his character is what makes him interesting to many people and makes people want to explore his backstory and stuff (and maybe give him some kind of redemption arch)? It’s okay to like villains and people in fiction who you wouldn’t IRL? He did all the bad stuff he did and that’s actually very interesting and way more cool than if we sooth him over so he’s easily digestible. 

Anyway, that’s my rant.

[nightswithkookmin]

chile i'm so glad i came across your blog, the amount of "i'm not going to assume they're dating" or "we can only draw certain conclusions but i can't say for sure" "we don't know their sexuality, BUT" type blogs i follow is getting kinda wack lmao. while i appreciate their perspective and nuanced takes i need to strike a balance. like let's get a lil delulu every once in a while. 💀

lol the im-not-a-shipper-but-call-jikook-boyfriends-every-other-post blogs are the funniest to me. the shipping hierarchy, so to speak is so weird. maybe just because im not a "shipping real people is bad" person i don't see the big deal. gonna get called delulu anyway, might as well go full out. they is gay/queer and they're fucking. i'm so sorry.

*also can we touch on the fact that shipping in this type of fandom (kpop) is kind of inevitable and unavoidable??! these boys are the other people we see them with day in and day out, interacting with each other and no one else. i feel like it's natural to ship when there's no other people around to break up everything, idk maybe someone can articulate this better than me. and people who are made to feel stupid for thinking that 2 members could actually be dating is so dumb. like is it really out of the realm of possibility that two people (jikook, cause all them other ships are....😬) who spent almost every waking minute together for like 8 years could fall in love. really?

/rant

It's the delulu hat for me

Lmho.

I guess for me being queer, I feel it's gaslighting for these people to be saying things like that. As silly as it is, it inadvertently deny and invalidate the existence and queerness of gay individuals and so I struggle with it.

This is the consequences of straight people in gay people business. They like defining gay parameters for us and it's like who asked you?? I feel people who say things like that are just plain ignorant or tone deaf or willfully homophobic.

I don't think everyone in BTS is gay but it makes me feel safe to see half the community assume them to be and celebrate them in that way. They are not cussing at them and threatening to leave the fandom or cancel them for this assumption and that is huge inspiration to me.

Those parts of the fandom are a safe space to be in as a queer army.

When people assume a person's queer sexuality they are simply admitting to themselves at the very least that LGBTQ EXISTS. This is important to me because I grew up in a community where LGBTQ didn't even exist in the collective consciousness of the people and EVERYONE IS AUTOMATICALLY ASSUMED TO BE STRAIGHT AND EXPECTED TO BE.

People read people's sexuality all the time and have done so since time immemorial and a lot of the time when they have had a sexuality read it's in the lines of straight, cis, rich, poor, superior or inferior. And that is a problem for some of us too because that discrepancy in the assumptions is as a result of homophobia and heteronormativity.

That whole don't assume a person's queer sexuality debacle sounds to me like a boujee way of denormalizing and preventing the normalization of queerness disguised under care, disguised under intelligence and disguised under wokeness. Especially when straightness is the default setting in this giant blue bulb.

We need to radicalize that. We need to change the cis straight default setting and if you are perpetuating this narrative you really aren't helping the situation. SIT DOWN.

I'm rarely assumed to be queer in certain circles and while that makes me feel comfortable within those circles it often times make it hard for me to admit my queerness openly in those circles too because I fear I will lose that comfort and respect and love and privileges that comes with being percieved straight in those spaces.

When I started my blog, I noticed some people assumed I was white and would use certain black descriptors as slurs when describing other people to me. I quickly had to switch the formal way in which I wrote to a much casual tone so my blackness would show through. Don't get it twisted. She black. She blackidy black black.

Then on the other hand, I was hesitant to let my queerness be known too because being black, I was marginalized as it is- you is black, or sound black💀 you know how it is- it's that intersectionality of oppression at play. Double double homicide.

When certain people realized I was black POC minority, their attitude towards me changed. I had those who didn't so much understand what black language is or perhaps wasn't used to being in black spaces and were uncomfortable with my blackness- these would take offense at me saying certain things in certain ways. Like chilee relax Karen, all I said was these motherfukkers gay as shit and they gay. Why you acting like I called them twinks or sommin. Right there, I'm cancelled for calling Jikook motherfuckers. They get sirens and everything😭😭😭😭😭😭

Same vein, I struggle destraightening myself or correcting people who assume I'm straight because I fear they will treat me differently if they knew I wasn't.

Straight privilege exists in the same way as white or even pretty privilege may exist and because these exist there's that automatic conception of queer, poc, ugly, fat disemfranschismet to run along side it.

People treat you differently based on how they perceive you. That's a fact. And for queer people, perceiving us as straight is the only way we get to be treated as human by the masses. And a lot of us embrace that- straight until proven gay am I right 🤣🤣🤣🤣

It's the duper's delight for me. Untill you catch me with a 5'8 melanin skinned silk pressed auntie on my left nipple good luck proving I'm gay.

It can be fun, I akekeke when some people around me are totally oblivious to the fact and even sometimes defend my straightness with their dying breath when nasty friends throw them shades or try to out me unprovoked.

A lot of us don't want to admit we are gay because we don't want to be disenfranchised.

I speak for myself when I say this.

But 'Don't assume someone's sexuality' is a double edged censorship used for and against queer people. It seemly offers protection on the surface of it for queer people but underneath it promotes heteronormativity and standardizes straightness and it is also used to promote closet culture, under the disguise of care and concern for the autonomy of queer people but that is a fallacy because our autonomy has never mattered to anyone since the dawn of homophobia.

And I don't know where this interpretation comes from. Why do people not want to assume queer people's sexuality but it's ok to assume straight people's???

It feels like a hijacked movement to me.

THIS IS THE ACCURATE MOVEMENT AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED.

Don't assume all people are straight. It's ok to assume some people are queer because queer people exists too.

It is wrong however to assume queerness based on how a person talks, walks, dresses or even on their body type. That is stereotyping. And stereotyping is wrong.

When it comes to Jikook, Jimin is often stereotyped as gay more so than Jungkook because they have different body structures. Jungkook is stereotyped too solely because of the way his wrists hang, or based on moments he's femininity shines through.

But I don't think shippers stereotype Jikook in that way at all. I dont think shippers believe Jikook are dating eachother simply because Jungkook applied setting powder to his face that one time. They assume they are gay only because they believe those two to be dating eachother. That is not stereotyping. If those two were heterosexuals I don't think people will accuse their shippers of stereotyping.

It's one thing to assume Kai is gay because he looks skinny and dances well. It's another to assume he is gay because in a relationship with Gdragon. And if people can't tell the difference between the two, they should get some education and stop talking about things they know nothing about or only know because they stumbled across user69 on Twitter. They are not helping.

Untill people get offended when people assume others are straight, that rhetoric doesn't matter in its inequality. If you ask me, everyone is gay until proven straight.

Yet how many people will take offense at that?

Assuming people can be gay is not delulu.

It's ok to assume people can be gay. It's wrong to stereotype them as gay. If you can't assume they are gay, don't assume they are straight and don't assume at all. Run with this sis.

Wait, they don't ship Jikook but they call Jikook boyfriends???????👀👀👀👀👀

The fake woke syndrome will kill people in this fandom with these mentally confused thought crisis bunch💀💀💀💀

Jikook themselves are shippers💀

Smh

GOLDY