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o-uncle-newt · 2 years

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Forgive me for hijacking my JF fanblog for this, an overly long rapture about Dorothy L Sayers's fabulous Gaudy Night

Or don't, I don't care. But either way, I'll be back to the regularly scheduled programming eventually, not that it was ever very regularly scheduled.

Anyhow-

I love Gaudy Night. One of my favorite books. It's not perfect, but it's brilliant, and that's better. Brilliance is rarely perfect because it requires creativity and an element of risk. Gaudy Night takes risks that don't all work, but when they do they are sublime.

I think the book is purposely messy and layered in ways where you can assume you know what Sayers was trying to say but can also get totally different things out of it. Purposeful in a choose-your-own-adventure way. You can read it as being purely feminist and ignoring class, or you can read it as being about women who are purely feminist and ignore class (to their detriment and ultimately peril). You can read it as Harriet falling in love with Peter or you can read it as Harriet discovering she was always a little bit in love with him. You can read it as being about women who prioritize integrity or you can read it as being about women who have grown comfortable and cloistered from real world responsibilities. And, of course, you can read it as women being cloistered from real life responsibilities or you can read it as female academics being held to a standard of responsibility that would never be expected of male ones. So many things to explore!

Also, it happens to speak to a lot of things I'm going through right now, though more in specific motifs than in the central conflict per se. (In my case, without being too personal, it's mostly the theme of ruminating endlessly over a choice that, once I've decided, will have felt inevitable.) So that kind of feeling of sitting in Harriet's headspace- and what a clearly defined headspace it is!- is pretty wonderful if jarring.

And so much amazingness- the punt? The chessmen?! Placetne domina?!? Yes, even the dog collar, because the way it's used is just kind of perfect. (And my mandatoryish JF reference here- as in my previous (re)blog, I really wonder if the idea for the dog collar in Here's What We Do came from this book. The conceptual resemblance is pretty uncanny.)

And human feelings!! Like, I came away from this book being genuinely unsure if I'd like either Harriet or Peter if I knew them in real life. Harriet is really judgmental in a way that I've never particularly liked in people, and Peter is smug in a way that would get my goat pretty quickly. But they're messy and in this book Harriet in particular feels real (and Peter feels real through her eyes) and messy real people are the most fun to read about. And "intellectual" romances are the best because the people in them think so much and get so mushy. They're really a perfect pair for this sort of thing and are loveable and compelling on their own terms.

(I also think, incidentally, that Busman's Honeymoon is a wonderful book, if somewhat ridiculous in the mystery and village-folk bits, and really underrated as an exploration of the challenge that Miss De Vine gives Harriet as to what happens when two intellects, and independent forces, marry. Where does one give way, and where does one stand firm? And what does it mean once someone has made a decision and feels at peace with it, and once someone has been pursuing something for so long and finally has it? How do they rebalance the relationship now that it is Harriet who, in many ways, has the emotional upper hand? And the ending is a LOT in a really great way.)

Though... I'll take a sec to rant about the miniseries version of Gaudy Night, with the full acknowledgement that I'm far from the first to do so. No chessmen? No dog collar? No Reggie Pomfret? No proposal letter? No St George? The creator sitting down and apparently saying "hmmm, people are OBVIOUSLY fans of Gaudy Night because of the intricate mechanisms of the poison pen mystery"? The way in which Peter is so pushy and off-putting at the beginning, and is the one who brings up the idea of academic women being repressed? The gratuitously edited dialogue? The way that the proposal at the end is portrayed as inevitable rather than the leap of faith that Peter helps Harriet to make? The fact that Peter NEVER APOLOGIZES?! Not even Harriet Walter and Edward Petherbridge save it, and that says a lot, because they're really good in it, even if I always thought that Petherbridge was just SLIGHTLY off as Wimsey (over-mannered and not particularly dynamic, though with great subtle physical comedy)- but Harriet Walter was always spot on and I'm kind of in love with her in this role, or possibly want to be her, I'm never sure (though I'd never pull off the hairstyle).

Though I will say, re the Peter never apologizing bit: the other two miniseries ARE genuinely good, I think- Strong Poison diverges from the book but in interesting ways except for the ending, which I'll get to in a minute, and Have His Carcase is basically as good an adaptation as anyone could have expected and the pacing edits generally work- but I think the whole miniseries run has one uniting flaw, which is that rather than follow Sayers's lead and have the trilogy deconstruct the idea that Peter is trying to wear Harriet down into proposing, the show seems to almost purposely perpetuate it. It's by far the most explicit in the Gaudy Night adaptation, but in Strong Poison, the awful flip of the ending in which it's Peter running after Harriet sets this up as the guy chasing the girl, and the very over the top attempts at compliments and physical affection in Have His Carcase are very irritating, even as the show does a phenomenal job with the argument scene. Gaudy Night only makes it worse, of course, with that cringeworthy scene at the dance and the complete lack of any depth to their relationship beyond what seems like perpetual nudging on his part, culminating in a basically sterile proposal scene that really does feel like he finally managed to wear her down. (I did read that Petherbridge and Walter rewrote it to be better, and I don't doubt that it was much worse originally, but it still is not great.)

Finally, a few random fancasting notes:

I've never really thought overmuch about modern day fancasting, but I feel like Tom Goodman-Hill would be very good as Wimsey. No opinion on who'd play Harriet.

I've also had this feeling that I'd have LOVED to see a British-accented David Hyde Pierce in the role of Wimsey back in the day (of course he's too old now). Would he be pretty similar to Petherbridge? Maybe. But I think that he'd bring something really interesting to the part that I'd have loved to see. Or maybe I just unreasonably love Niles Crane, also a possibility.

I think that if any new version of the LPW books comes out, Harriet Walter should play the Dowager Duchess. She would be absolutely wonderful.

#dorothy l sayers #lord peter wimsey #harriet vane #gaudy night #strong poison #have his carcase #busman's honeymoon #edward petherbridge #harriet walter

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sbrown82 · 1 year

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Shel, I have a few questions to ask here. I see you as a tumblr big sis (&and I thank you for putting me on Re: so much like the Kim Snyder smoothie, restaurants cuz I always crave plantain, etc):

- what are creative (yet still “team player”, since that’s my workplace culture😒) ways to say “no” to a colleague that tries to ask if you can do something for them (ie. “Can y help me since I have notes? Cool! Make copies and put them on my desk for me to look at. I’ll be at lunch” bitch what??!?)

- how do you deal with another woman (esp. another black woman) suddenly doing a 180 and showing you/revealing that she’s threatened by you and thinks your healing journey is going better than hers & life is treating you better than her? That shocked and hurt me & I’m trying to heal from being triggered each time I see her on here on a mutual tumblr page.

- how would you deal with projections/people (I really only care if it’s other women and esp other BW) not liking you, connecting with you or projecting things on you (esp. when you have never talked to them)?

I also want to ask you because I believe u once said that u went to an all girls school where some girls did the most to you and at some point u became a loner and ur attitude was like “you think I care what you think??” I thought “I want to be like that!!”

Please help🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

This is funny! So, okay...

First of all, at work you need to be a little more straightforward with people. Quit the self-deprecating explanations and be candid with people. Instead of saying, 'You know, I just don't have the bandwidth for this right now," you have to be like "I have a lot on my plate that I need to prioritize and I'd be unable to do a good a job on whatever you're working on and my other work would suffer.” You can tell people to f*ck off without telling them to fuck off, believe me!

In terms of ole girl, sis just stay in your lane and worry 'bout yours. I ain't steady worried 'bout none of these mfs out here.

You're clearly young, when you get to my age babyyyy, you don't care what people think. I don't give a hoot. That's the best thing about getting old!

I did! I went to an all-girls private school during my college years and it was tough. I had to deal with girls from completely different backgrounds than mine. Mind you, I was smart, but I was also a Black girl straight out the hood from Brookln, and them rich southern broads probably wasn't used to a girl like me. I was a loner and kind of blunt, but my attitude was very much Idgaf. Stop worrying about what people think. I never saw any one of them again! Lol

#anon #sbrown82

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swaghaver69 · 5 months

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i’m excited to be able to have my own life to decide what i wanna do with and build how i like and stuff. i get very nervous but i’m excited to have the freedom of choice and it makes me happy to be able to pursue the things that feel right to me deep down. like continuing my education in science and pursuing and prioritizing women and my relationships with them. i’m excited for my life. i wanna get a calico cat and a tarantula and snails. i wanna try that living in a van thing one day. and i do think it would be nice to marry a lady one day. i’m still making baby steps though. i’m still even trying to get my drivers license. but i have time and i’m making progress and it’s all going to be ok. i’m still just starting out trying to figure things out. i’m trying to read more books and listen to more types of music and stuff. i’ve been enjoying pottery painting. i do want to try to get back into art and doing creative stuff. i wanna get more crystals and go more places and meet more people. my anxiety gets overwhelming sometimes but i’m trying my best to work through it. it’ll all end up ok i think and hope. i’m excited for my upcoming birthday party and being able to hang out with my younger brother and go to pride with him and stuff. maybe my best friend can find a festival to sell her tie dye t shirts at or something. idk. i’ve just been so cooped up and stifled for so long i’m excited to go out and live life and do things and enjoy it. nervous too but trying to get over it! there’s so much to do and see and learn and people to meet. i hope i do well.

#my txt

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daquanshell · 7 months

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The Start of a New Career

It’s been about two months since I started my tenure with the PHP Agency and a little over a month since I completed pre-licensing.

Unfortunately, due to bad timing and personal issues, I haven’t been able to schedule my licensing exam, and the material is slowly fading from my short term memory. I’ve been trying to avoid getting an extension, but if it takes too long to resolve these personal matters than it may be inevitable, but I’d like to explore other options before I go spending even more money on pre-licensing, since I feel I’ve already spent enough.

The inability to move forward with my career has really put a lot of pressure on me personally, since I feel both trapped in the amount of money I make and trapped emotionally; I have a psychological need to sell, and not being able to go out to the field is absolute torture.

A Marketing Genius

As a financial representative, I not only have complete control over whom I do business with but I have an excuse to talk to anyone. I have an excuse to get dressed and go out into society, take pictures, videos, write letters, publish books, articles, design products, posters, flyers, and really go all out on the creative aspects. I can’t just do it “for the sake of doing it”, I can’t just do it for the sake of art, or creation, or love, or anything other than the cold hard truth. I want the money, and the freedom that comes with it. I want the justifiable spending of marketing and advertising, the justifiable outreach to actors, models, talent, creators, men and women of all ages.

As a financial representative, I approach whom I want to approach. If I see a beautiful woman across the street and I think to myself “wow, I’d like to spend more time with her”, I immediately begin asking myself the following questions:

does she live around here?

what is her name?

how old is she?

what does she do for work?

how do I learn more about her?

how do I pique her interest?

how do I stay in touch with her?

From my understanding of society, a man approaching a woman with that line of questioning typically has a sexual or romantic connotation, which brings me to the root of the problem I have been having: I naturally have a romantic approach to marketing.

You Broke My Heart

It is heart breaking not having anything for sale. This is an important feeling to burn into my memory, as it marks the completion of a transformation and the start of a new chapter in my life.

Originally, my academic background was in Interactive Media Production, before studying Graphic Design. I’ve known I’ve wanted to go back to school for awhile now but I couldn’t decide what I wanted to study. While I had a marginally successful career in Marketing, my soul was still that of an artist. This became even more apparent in the military, when a majority of the work I did was as an artist. Despite doing so much work, with plenty of perks and praise, I felt something was missing, and I couldn’t exactly put my hand on it.

Towards the Future

So I’ve made a few decisions. Yes, I’ll stay with PHP long-term and figure it out. Yes, I’ll go back to school, this time for Marketing, at the very least until I get a Bachelor’s Degree. Yes, I’ll attend multiple schools to get the most out of my education. Yes, I’ll establish permanent residency in Maryland, Baltimore specifically, despite the dangers of living here. Yes, I’ll still play video games and watch movies with my family and do things that aren’t business sometimes. Yes, I’ll still draw, and write, and paint and take advantage of all the skills I’ve developed over the years.

Now I get why I’ve been stagnant professionally, since I’ve been trying to put business first. You really do have to prioritize your personal life. Hopefully I can get my personal life in enough order to consistently publish content, launch some products, and get back out there and start dating.

Maybe it’s the haircut, but I definitely feel as though I got my groove back. Maybe I should try my luck, assuming I can stick to the script!

#sales #marketing #business #insurance #finance #dating #romance #suit #studying #notes #fit check #glow #careers #personal development #advertising #design

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alejandra-riveros003 · 8 months

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From the beginning, I approached the assignment with an open mind. Not having too much experience with abstract art or 3D art for that matter, I wanted this project to be about learning and possibly finding a new way to express my ideas creatively. I also wanted this project to convey a message, this was kind of a challenge that I set up for myself; transmitting a message through non-representational art, which I have no experience with. I wanted to choose objects that held a personal meaning. Moreover, I wanted to choose objects that truly represented a personal duality; two parts of myself that are still trying to understand each other. I chose objects that related to my motherhood experience and objects that related to my experience as a young woman. I decided from the start that the motherhood pieces would be arranged in an asymmetrical way as to represent the chaos and messiness that motherhood entails, and that I would arrange the rest of the pieces in a symmetrical way as to represent the opposite; a part of my life that seemed simpler, more orderly and harmonious. I chose to spray paint both pieces in white because it is often associated with perfection; the perfection women are supposed to convey both in motherhood and in life in general.

In the symmetrical piece, I tried to construct an ode to a part of me that is not quite forgotten but often overlooked. Since becoming a mother, not only do I have little time to take care of myself, but even feel guilty when I decide to prioritize me over my son. In this piece, I decided to arrange old and used beauty and skin care items making sure to keep a symmetry between the right and left side as well as the superior and inferior part of the assemblage, which I think can be noticed. In the asymmetrical piece, I wanted to portray the mess of motherhood and the way this mess can be isolating, by choosing objects like an old breast pump, an old pacifier, breast milk storage bottles, and more. Additionally, I added two necklaces to the composition as to accentuate the quality of perfection women are still expected to portray even when they are struggling to find themselves in motherhood. These objects are not arranged in any particular order other than in one that still holds some harmony, so that the eye of the viewer can flow through the piece and appreciate the chaos. MY assignment is successfully completed, when I look at it, I see the message I wanted to convey, I see the two parts of myself I wanted to dissect, and I see an abstract piece of art that is extremely personal and emotional to me. I thoroughly enjoyed this assignment because it allowed me to not only explore a new type of creative expression but also to put a raw part of myself in a piece of art in a way that I don’t think I had done before.

The first picture is of the two assemblages together

the second picture is of the asymmetrical assemblage titled: “A Mother Is Born”

the third picture is of the symmetrical assemblage titled: “A Woman Is Forgotten”

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yuna-writes · 1 year

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Lately, I’ve been feeling kind of bored at work, but I gave up on the idea of finding a job that’s ‘fun.’ Some days my job can be fun, but majority of the time the work is too easy so I get bored easily. It pays incredibly well, and there’s some sense of job security and stability associated with it. I could try to find that ‘fun’ job, but it can pay terribly bad and it can be stressful.

These days, I’m not sure what my next ‘steps’ are. I feel like I spent a good majority of time trying to become a designer. Now that I achieved it, I’m not sure exactly what I want to do next. Funny how as human beings we always look for the next thing. We go to school, graduate, go off to college, and then find a career etc. Once you reach to your destination, where do you go from there?

I think the usual next steps normally is that people get married, have kids, work that 9-5 job and live a ‘normal’ life. I’m frankly not very interested lol. I would like to get married, but I don’t think I want to invest my entire livelihood on family. I guess some people would find me strange but I like to spend my time thinking about creative ideas and how to innovate them. It just excites me more. I want to build upon my ideas rather then building a family. I’ve accepted it’s what I truly want but I do feel a little different when I see other people prioritize their life around their children. It’s like the biggest goal in life for them is to procreate and have kids. Why don’t I have such desires?

It’s not really a new phenomenon, I was always that creative kid that was really absorbed with my ideas and wasn’t so interested in the dating culture as much. I like the idea of being with a partner, but the whole dating culture was just so engrossingly superficial and obnoxious I didn’t want to participate in it. Now that dating culture has moved on to dating apps and it just made things more superficial lol. Romance in films and fictional story is pretty unrealistic when it comes to portraying how relationships really are in real life. I bet that disparity is going to grow larger considering dating culture has moved unto dating apps and I rarely ever see dating apps mentioned in a fictional story about romance.

I always see people putting romance and relationships on top of their priority in life after career. I just like putting my creative ideas on top of priority and I guess some people won’t understand it. It’s not really about maintaining career or anything. I think careers can be temporary but the legacy and impact you have left behind in your work matters to me more. I want to be known as that cool and creative person who created some neat invention that changed someone’s life. I’m pretty confident most people don’t have those thoughts. They prioritize and invest into relationships more and I respect it. However, I don’t really share my real thoughts because then I feel they won’t respect it. On the outside, people can act nice to not sound rude. But their real thoughts is that they find you weird.

My philosophy is that you live one life. If the traditional sense of starting a family isn’t for me, might as well accept it and quickly move on. Sometimes I scratch my head not knowing exactly where this road is taking me and I don’t have close connections with someone who can help. I notice not a lot of women are inventors or engineers. The women in my social connections have a pretty typical female lifestyle. They are married, have one or two kids, and work in a stable and structured job. Usually they work in more social jobs like teaching, nursing, therapy or other jobs that require social skills. I don’t have many female role models to live by, because they live a very different life so I can’t get advice addressing my specific problems. The only female friend I know who seems to understand my ideas and ambitions is a woman who works as a software engineer, but she’s really the only one.

#notes

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rochellekohanteb · 1 year

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Blog Post 2

Explain TWO (2) real-life issues that make it necessary to create your Earthseed community. What are you seeking shelter from?

Two issues that make it necessary to create my Earthseed community are gender-based violence, and discrimination in the workplace. Women, as well as people who identify as non-binary receive an overwhelming amount of harassment and violence in our society, as well as gender inequality and harassment in the place of work.

Quote two (2) Earthseed verses from Parable of the Sower and show how you will apply them to your community. You may be creative in your interpretation.

The first quote that I will apply to my community is “All that you touch, you change. All that you change, changes you. The only lasting truth is change. G-d is change.” This would apply to my community because it would mean that although we know things will be changing, we will be strong in adapting to those changes. It could also mean that the people in my community can find the power in them to change things that need to be changed.

The next quote that I would apply to my community is “The destiny of Earthseed is to take root amongst the stars”. This would apply because it highlights the fact that our small community would be a part of a much larger movement to help end and resolve the issues that we face.

Explain WHERE you will create your Earthseed community to be safe.

My Earthseed community will take place in a safe and remote area that will help to decrease the influence and pressure on the main society. I imagine it being somewhere like a big grassy field where there is no society for miles around.

Who can join your community and why? Who can’t join? Why not?

My community will consist of anyone who shares the same beliefs. I would not discriminate based on gender, sexual orientation, race, or any other kind of identity factor because that is exactly the kind of behavior that I am trying to stay away from. Anyone who took part in any kind of hate or assault of sexist or racist nature would not be welcome in my community.

What will your leadership model be for your community?

My leadership model for my community would rely on a collective decision making process in which everyone has a fair say in what they want, as well as a shared responsibility system so that everyone would pull the same weight. My belief is that everyone has a unique and individual perspective that deserves to be welcomed and shared with the rest of the community.

Create a FUTURE TECHNOLOGY (one on the horizon, not something like teleportation or time travel) to help improve life at your Earthseed community.

A future technology that would help improve life in my community would be 3D printing. This technology would allow for our community to create three-dimensional objects such as tools and parts, as well as medical devices that we would normally have to look elsewhere for. It would help us be much more self-reliant and stay away from mainstream society.

Explain/show how your Earthseed community will SURVIVE.

Our community will survive for many reasons, the main one being that we trust and rely on each other. Our culture would be based on cooperation and mutual support from each other. Additionally, we would rely on sustainable practices and being self-sufficient in order to stay afloat on our own without relying on other communities. We would also prioritize things like education, safety, skill-sharing, etc.

Explain/show what TWO steps your Earthseed community will make to build a better future, i.e. education, housing, conservation, farming, etc.

One step that my community will take to build a better future is a strong foundation of not only education, but the sharing of knowledge that each individual has. This would be a priority because it will allow each individual to have a strong foundation of whatever knowledge and skills that they need to thrive. This strength in education will include having the knowledge to do things such as farm, self-reliance, sustainable living, etc.

Another step to help build a better future would be to ensure a strong sense of activism and advocacy. All members of the community will not only share in the strong need to show their activism and advocate for those like them, but they will help to prioritize those individuals who have been affected by things such as gender based discrimination, harassment violence, inequality in the workplace, etc.

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leveloneandup · 2 years

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The Reimagined Now

Christen Press was born to play for Angel City. “I wanted to play at the highest level on a team that had ambition to win, and then after I heard about the club, I found out about the mission and the vision and the why. It felt serendipitous because a lot of the values that this club holds are the values that I’ve prioritized in my own life. I was meant to play here. And it really called to me to play for a team that has equity at its core.”

Press is inventive as a goal-scoring forward, but her creativity thrives most as the co-founder and CEO of re-inc. “I brought my characteristics as a player into myself as a CEO. People always say, ‘athletes make great entrepreneurs.’ And I was like, ‘That’s a lie.’ And then I started to do it, and I did understand what people meant because there’s a relentlessness and a little bit of a craze [you have to have] as an athlete.”

Press feels empowered to fulfill her larger calling at her day job, and for the first time, she sees herself in the Angel City ownership group. “For the entirety of my career, I’ve been trying to push the game forward alongside all of my teammates. There’s a full job off the field, fighting for resources and trying to raise the standard. I think Angel City just represents that entire mission of a new future for women athletes — and progress. And to have female ownership and leadership, it offers a different model where now when we need something, and we’re speaking to the people that own and started this club, there’s less of this feeling of resistance — like we’re fighting against the man that has the money.”

For Press, every day has its own legacy. “Legacy is kind of a funny word for me. It’s a big word. I don’t think about legacy. I think about impact, [and] I think about touching people’s lives. I’m a very existential thinker [and] kind of person, and even in hard times in my career, it’s not that I was a little girl that played football. What motivates me is that there’s people in the stands, and for those 90 minutes, they’re having fun. And they’re celebrating. And they’re with their friends and families. So, touching people is what really motivates me and the movement you can create.”

#christen press #boardroom #interview #angel city fc

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absurdthirst · 2 years

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Funny to see how you try to justify yourself! You have zero respect for him. Writing fanfic is one thing, writing perverted porn is something quite different. You lot all sound like either menopausal old women or virgins who think this is what sex is like… Source

Also, no need to read anything as long as you simply see the tags on the story. Are you so sexually frustrated that you write ten thousands of words on the subject? Additionally, married women who write fanfics are very sorry people. I feel for their husbands whom their wives find it more interesting writing porn about actors than caring about them. But like you said, you do you, keep writing your filth and I hope he never has to come across you ever. What a disgrace you are. Source

Pack it up folks. We are apparently wicked and perverted. So apparently, there are different levels of fanfic. Fanfic is okay as long is it only includes the things that they approve of.

The ageism is fucking nauseating. I’m so fucking sick of young twits believing that people closer in age to the fucking real life age of the man we are fans of is somehow gross.

Do you honestly believe that using our downtime, our creativity, to write fanfic affects relationships with spouses? It doesn’t. It’s called being an adult and being able to prioritize. Just because we write dirty fanfic doesn’t mean I love my husband any less and some are not married.

One day they are going to get old and realize that your interests don't change. You are just shamed for them.

These posts just scream I am a fucking child and other ridiculously gross things. Like homophobia. And religious purity.

And laughing my ass off at you sending this to @scribbledghost of all people. She writes the least porny fanfic out of most of us. Her work is beautiful and heartfelt. Go bully someone else with your bullshit - or better yet, keep your stupid fucking opinion to yourself.

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aphrostarot · 3 years

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Who Are You Pick a Pile

How are you seen by your friends, family, you, and society? How do you want to be seen and who are you actually?

Remember that this is a general reading and some things may not apply to you. Do not try and force it to fit. If you would like a personal reading you can click here. There I have my shop where I offer all of my readings. Or you can dm me with what you'd like.

*Please read before you pick a pile*

I say spirit when I am channeling and writing out your readings, if you do not believe in spirit that is totally okay, this message is still meant for you if you feel that it is! Whatever you believe in is valid and you can ignore when I say spirit if you don't believe in it or, replace it with whoever you believe is giving you this message. If you have any questions or you just want to talk about this feel free to dm me!

Pile One (Rose Quartz):

How do your friends see you?

Three of Wands: In this specific deck the three of wands is depicted as a long journey ahead, one that you are just starting. That being said, this would mean that your friends see you as someone who is starting a journey, maybe of self-discovery, a career journey, spiritual journey, etc. Your friends see you as someone strong, knows what they want, and is driven to get that.

The Avenger: The Avenger is made, not born. Her state of mind evolved from a primal desire for vengeance - and she has the drive to carry it out by whatever means necessary. The Avenger is distinguished by her ability to weaponize her innate knowledge and her surroundings and forgoes other elements of her personality until justice is served. In revenge films, the Avenger functions as karma personified - and her payback is defined by its symbolic, poetic flourish. Your friends think you’re strong and that you are someone who has fought to become who they are and will continue to fight until they become who they want to be.

How does your family see you?

Five of Pentacles: This card represents poverty, a great loss. Your family sees you as someone who has lost a lot and is currently in a dark place, in a low. They think that you are going through a tough time. You have lost a lot and that you need help.

The Goth: The Goth lives in a romantic world of horror and death. In genre fiction, the Goth often finds herself as the keeper of a mystical secret, an explorer of unholy ground, or an unknowing link to the realm of the dead. She often makes her home in a remote, decaying property, and her solitude allows for her to fully embrace every instance of terror. While the Goth’s inquisitive nature and innate resolve allow her to stand up against corrupt forces, both human and supernatural, she may also allow herself to be seduced by dark passions. This is how your family sees you, as someone who has accepted the darkness and is not willing to come out. They also see you as someone who wants to go against the grain and does their own thing.

How do you see you?

The Sun: Happiness is the meaning of this card. You see yourself as someone who is happy, successful, optimistic, and confident. You feel like you have this warm energy surrounding you, yellow may resonate with you. You feel like you are a light in a lot of people’s lives like you are the person people go to when they need someone to brighten their mood.

Two of Pentacles: The primary meaning of this card is, balance and all things that come with it such as; adaption, flexibility, and resourcefulness. Again, you view yourself as someone who is resourceful, the person that others go to when they need help. You feel as though you have your life in check, you know what you want and how you’re going to get it. You feel like you are good at balancing things and keeping everything in order.

The Muse: The Muse speaks to the soul. In fiction, the Muse is a woman who embodies the spirit of a particular moment so much that she’s upheld as an inspiration. While the Muse may be kept as a source of personal inspiration for an artist, her life is an artistic expression in itself. She may exude an attitude, philosophy, or appearance that makes her emblematic of lifelong creative or romantic partnerships. Even if her je ne sais quoi is short-lived, her impact can be crystallized forever. You think you are the person who is an inspiration to the people around you, that people center their lives and pursuits off of what you have done and continue to do.

How does society see you?

Seven of Pentacles: This is the card of growth, of hard work paying off after some planning. Society sees you as someone who has gone through a lot and has grown from that, that you’ve planned the way you want your life to go and that you execute those plans. You do everything you need to in order to get to where you want to be.

The Spinster: The Spinster is unbothered. In romance fiction, the Spinster is a woman who has remained single past the age deemed desirable, and as such is typically childless. The Spinster’s isolation from traditional domestic roles of wife and mother makes her solitary life a source of speculation and projected anxiety. The Spinster is generally used to caution young women against the dead-end of an unmarried life, and her solitude is seen as a consequence of curdled femininity. Whether by choice or not, the Spinster has the ability to rely solely on herself. Society views you as an independent person, someone who doesn’t need anyone, someone who chooses to be single because they don’t need anyone other than themselves to make them happy.

How do you want to be seen?

The Hermit: This is the card of solitude, of self-reflection. Meaning, you want to be seen as someone who is independent, working on themselves, and growing. You may like the idea of people viewing you as a hard-working self-indulgent person, a person who keeps to themselves and has persevered through everything thrown their way. Someone who makes their life work and has gotten what they want because they worked for it.

The Earth Mother: The Earth Mother is in sync with her environment. In genre film, the Earth Mother represents a connection to the terrestrial, often by rejecting modernity and embracing life in nature. She may present as a hippie who prioritizes the health of the environment, or as the maternal figure in a commune, offering motherly guidance to those seeking a more pastoral life. She may also be upheld as a symbol of growth, harvest, or fertility, and possess a mystical connection to the secrets of the natural world. You very much may want to be seen as someone with cottage core energy.

Who are you actually?

Nine of Wands: You are someone who has a lot of emotional baggage from your upbringing or previous relationships. This makes you a people-pleaser who wants others to like you because, deep down, you feel unworthy. Therefore, you’re the type of person who others walk over and take advantage of. On the opposite end of the scale, you could be unwilling to let anyone into your inner circle. You do not trust easily and are suspicious of others. The Nine of Wands, however, is a sign that your mistrust may be justified, which is a positive aspect of the card; you’re not quick to let just anyone into your life.

The Maid: The Maid sees everything and tells nothing. In pulp fiction, the Maid is typically a meek domestic worker who peers into the daily intrigues of the family she’s working for. Be it excessive consumption, familial corruption, or adulterous affairs, the Maid is expected to sweep the scandals of the every day up and out of sight. Due to her exclusive access to people’s lives, she may often palsy as a star witness in a trial, or get caught up in a blackmail scheme. But the Maid typically represents some form of class repression or exploitation - until she gets the chance to turn the tables. You have been on the underside of life for a long time, that doesn’t mean you will always be that way, you can turn the tables after a bit of work

Pile Two (Sodalite):

How do your friends see you?

Page of Pentacles (reversed): The Page of Pentacles reversed represents someone who is; foolish, immature, irresponsible, lazy, an underachiever, and a procrastinator. This is how your friends see you as someone who is not reliable and is childish.

The Cyborg: The Cyborg is a transgressive blend of human and machine. In science fiction, the organic, human form can be supplemented with technological enhancement. As such, the Cyborg has the capacity for mechanical perfection, working in tandem with human thought, emotion, and values. While often a figure of fear for their ability to rewrite and surpass human flaws. The Cyborg may use their abilities for destruction, but can also offer a glimpse into a perfected human being who is able to transcend human history and work towards utopic harmony. Your friends see you as someone who needs an upgrade. Someone who needs to change so they can be like the cyborg, able to use their powers to bring about harmony or destruction.

How does your family see you?

Seven of Swords (reversed): This is the card of truth being revealed, of having been manipulative in the past and now coming out and revealing that truth. So, your family sees you as someone who has something to reveal, something that you have been hiding from them.

The Headmistress: The Headmistress rules with an iron fist. In fiction, the Headmistress is responsible for overseeing the entirety of a school, typically one for girls or young women, and for managing its students, staff, and grounds. While the Headmistress is typically a strict disciplinarian with an eye for getting results, she can also function as a maternal, albeit authoritative presence. Her reputation often precedes her, and being summoned into her office is enough to strike fear into the heart of any student. Your family views you as someone who is to be feared, someone who does whatever it takes to be heard and in control.

How do you see you?

Seven of Wands: You see yourself as someone who needs to stand up for yourself no matter what, defend yourself and your territory. You may have gone through a lot to get to where you are and you don’t what to lose it. You feel like people are constantly trying to question you and bring you down, so, you defend yourself.

The Empress: You view yourself as the Divine Feminine, as someone who embraces all things feminine. You think you are someone who is loving, warm, sensual, and that you are as charismatic as you are beautiful. You defend yourself because people don’t understand the real you, in your eyes.

The Siren: The Siren’s call is irresistible. In horror and mythology, the Siren is a beautiful amphibious creature who appears as a human woman or a human and animal hybrid. The Siren typically lives with others of her kind in the rocks and cliffs of coastal areas. Together, the Sirens use their powerful voices to lure passing sailors towards shipwreck and death. While the origins and goals of the Siren vary, she is ultimately symbolic of the challenge of resistance. You feel like you are irresistible, that you are someone that nobody can resist.

How does society see you? The Magician: The Magician is someone who is; spontaneous, skillful, creative, original, someone of quick understanding, excellent reasoning, intelligent initiatives, and intellectual curiosity. This is how society views you, as someone who is extremely intelligent, someone who uses their brain and is quick with it.

The Gamine: The Gamine strolls the side streets straight into your heart. In genre film and musicals, the Gamine appears as a young, often waifish woman with a penchant for androgynous style and frank speech. Her rejection of what’s ascribed as feminine is characterized by her embrace of the masculine, opting for a short chop or pixie cut and boxy clothes, and presenting a boyish, unpolished demeanor. The Gamine may pursue an independent, bohemian lifestyle in defiance of gender expectations, but is too charming to thwart off attention from suitors from all walks of life.

How do you want to be seen?

Queen of Swords: The Queen of Swords has very high standards and can be highly critical of herself and others, she doesn’t allow anyone to use her, she puts people in their place. You want to be seen as someone who stands up for themselves and is loved but slightly feared. You want people to understand where they stand with you and to not test you or cross you.

The Coquette: Flattery has gotten the Coquette everywhere, and she has no plans to stop now. In genre film or musicals, the Coquette has a way with words and a knack for reading people - particularly people who have something she wants. She can be an adept conversationalist or an emotional card sharp, but she’ll make you feel so good about yourself you won’t even miss whatever it is you’ve handed over. You want to be seen as someone who is charming, a little intimidating but still, charming. You want people to fear you but also love you.

Who are you actually?

Ace of Pentacles: You are or are meant to be very clever and full of ideas. You are very innovative and clever and you do best with intellectual activities. You use the power of your mind to achieve what you want and need. You will apply reason and intellect to confront issues occurring in your life. You have great literacy skills and rarely lose an argument or discussion. You are someone who is very competitive and will not let go of your position easily. You love taking risks. You usually become an expert in any field you work in. A part of you is very restless and you need to be constantly stimulated. Sometimes you get lost in your head and need to be grounded. It is worth mentioning that the Ace of Pentacles represents new money coming forward, so, it is worth saying that you may be meant to make money in some way.

The Diva: The Diva has a gift from heaven that can make your life hell. In genre film, the Diva is a commanding artistic presence with an impossibly unique talent. The Diva is highly sought after and showered with praise but can become indignant and fickle when she’s not in total control of her ability. She may demand that conditions be met perfectly in order for her to perform, and storm out if she’s denied. Ultimately, the Diva needs her talent to shine just as much as the people around her, and she will do what is necessary to stay in the spotlight. You are meant to be in the spotlight, whether that be literally famous or just in the spotlight in your personal surroundings.

Pile Three (Fuchsite):

How do your friends see you?

Ten of Wands (reversed): The Ten of Wands reversed represents that your friends see you as someone who is truly burdened by circumstances that are not necessary in your life. They think that you are shouldering too much responsibility, that you fail to delegate because you may fear asking for help or you truly believe that you are capable of handling it all on your own. They think that if you continue to go on this way, you will reach a breakdown.

Six of Pentacles (reversed): The Six of Pentacles reversed means that your friends think that you are someone who is extremely generous, to your own faults. You give too much, more than you are capable of giving. They think that you are extremely nice and caring but that you need to take care of yourself. This could also mean that they think that you are someone who gives but at a cost. That when you are “generous” it always comes with you expecting things in return. They think that you are selfish.

The Dancer: The Dancers body is their instrument. The Dancer presents a mastery of control over their physical movement and expression and is a subject of fascination across a variety of genres. In the psychological thriller, they may obsess over perfecting their performance to the point of mania; in horror, they may perform a physical expression of moral corruption; in erotica, they may move to seduce and entice. Regardless of their particular presentation, the Dancer commands attention through perseverance - their refinement of skill even if just performing for themselves. Your friends see you as someone who puts a lot of their body, as someone who works hard and doesn’t take care of themselves enough. They also see you as someone who is extremely talented at what they do regardless of whether they ask for help or not.

How does your family see you?

Seven of Swords: Your family thinks that you are sneaky, that you operate in the shadows and gather information that might later serve you. They think you may be planning to betray someone, or a group of people, in order to assure self-advancement.

On the other hand, they may think that you are trying to better your situation. They think that the people you surround yourself with may be causing you great misery, hindering your progress, or your road towards self-improvement. If that is the case, they feel that you need to escape your current situation without insulting or hurting the people around you.

The Avenger (reversed): The Avenger is made, not born. Her state of mind evolved from a primal desire for vengeance - and she has the drive to carry it out by whatever means necessary. The Avenger is distinguished by her ability to weaponize her innate knowledge and her surroundings and forgoes other elements of her personality until justice is served. In revenge films, the Avenger functions as karma personified - and her payback is defined by its symbolic, poetic flourish. When she is reversed though, that means that rather than being focused, of having the motivation to get things done, and of seeking justice you are; cruel, filled with rage, and obsessed with the wrong things. This is what they think of you. Going off of what was said above, your family thinks that your friends are doing this to you.

How do you see you?

Page of Cups: You see yourself as someone who is highly intuitive and sensitive to the entire world and various dimensions around you. You think you have a loving, gentle, and warm personality and a strong desire to be around kindred spirits, who help you to feel needed and special. You think you’re highly creative and emotional, that you can be as shy as you are desperate to avoid conflict. Although, you won’t back down from a fight if a fight is what’s called for.

The Spinster (reversed): The Spinster is unbothered. In romance fiction, the Spinster is a woman who has remained single past the age deemed desirable, and as such is typically childless. The Spinster’s isolation from traditional domestic roles of wife and mother makes her solitary life a source of speculation and projected anxiety. The Spinster is generally used to caution young women against the dead-end of an unmarried life, and her solitude is seen as a consequence of curdled femininity. Whether by choice or not, the Spinster has the ability to rely solely on herself. Now with this coming out reversed, instead of you thinking you’re like that you actually think you’re timid, full of fear, and in disarray. Yes, you think that you’re highly intuitive maybe even an empath but still, a part of you thinks that you are small and full of anxiety.

How does society see you?

Justice: Society sees you as a decent, law-abiding individual. They think you make decisions carefully, weighing all the pros and cons. That you are good with words and place a high value on education. Also that you are practical and cautious, but remain a romantic at heart.

Two of Cups: Society thinks you’re warm, loving, and sweet. That you are keen on building and maintaining strong, long-term relationships. That you will marry young and/or remain in a devoted relationship. They think that nurturing relationships are at the core of your belief system, they think you are a great friend, child, siblings, and lover. That you are a natural healer due to your ability to listen to your partners and give great advice in return.

The Cat Burglar: The Cat Burglar is at her best when you never see her at all. In genre fiction, the Cat Burglar has a knack for sneaking into places she’s not wanted and sneaking out with more than she had before. While she prefers to work in shadow, she’s also a master of disguise and can situate herself undetected in plain sight. She can also function as a lady thief, who only seeks impossibly difficult targets or the rarest of valuables, and seldom uses physical force in conquest. Society sees you as someone who is able to blend in wherever you go, but not because you are not noticed, it is your own choice. They see you as someone who is willing to do whatever it takes to get what you want.

How do you want to be seen?

The Hanged Man: You want to be seen as confident — perhaps overly so. This card can also represent indecision, and as such, you may be at risk of not recognizing these opportunities when they do come to you. Consequently, you remain forever in limbo, trapped in your indecision, your primary action being non-action. You want to be seen as the person who is extremely confident, not aware of the things around them, just happy with what they have, and happy to be where they are.

The Mystic: The Mystic is in touch with the divine. In fiction, the Mystic may appear as a visionary or prophet who receives messages from outside the earthly realm. She may also appear as a sorceress or alchemist who can manipulate natural materials for her own ends. In any iteration, she is well versed in esoteric interests and shrouded in mystery and can use her knowledge to better herself or provide guidance for others. You want to be seen as someone who can help others and who has abilities.

Who are you actually?

Queen of Wands: You are meant to be passionate and ambitious. You are meant to be quite extroverted, with a radiant and friendly quality about you. At your core, you are a highly social creature, with a natural tendency to spread happiness and joy.

You also have a high sense of self-worth and will not let others belittle you. You aspire to be successful on a professional level — and almost always attain it

The Cyborg: The Cyborg is a transgressive blend of human and machine. In science fiction, the organic, human form can be supplemented with technological enhancement. As such, the Cyborg has the capacity for mechanical perfection, working in tandem with human thought, emotion, and values. While often a figure of fear for their ability to rewrite and surpass human flaws. The Cyborg may use their abilities for destruction, but can also offer a glimpse into a perfected human being who is able to transcend human history and work towards utopic harmony. You are meant to use your abilities of spreading happiness and joy for the greater good.

#tarot #oracle #pick a pile #pick a card #tarot cards #oracle cards #spirituality #astrology #aries #taurus #gemini #cancer #leo #virgo #libra #scorpio #sagittarius #capricorn #aquarius #pisces

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yandere-mha · 4 years

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Time to be horny. What’s everyone 20+ on your favourite list’s favourite sex act?

This request actually won first place for the Christmas gift vote so congrats!! Also it’s always time to be horny and no this is definitely not a debatable or problematic thing to say.

TW: SMUT, NSFW, NON-CON, RAPE, DUBIOUS CONSENT, BDSM, BLOOD MENTION, ORAL, PERIOD SEX, ABUSE, BODY IMAGE ISSUES, MENTAL ILLNESS.

READ AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION:

My favorite Yandere BNHA AU character’s favorite sex acts:

Dabi: So... As always with this man, he has a duality in regards to this as well. As we all know, he craves your touch and he wants to feel cared for. If you were to ride his cock/top him while you body worship him, he would probably explode in more ways than one. Even if you were only to do it once, he would treasure that memory and crave that feeling again for the rest of his life. However, he doesn’t ever ask for you to touch him - he either silently expects you to volunteer or uses his body as a punishment for you because he believes that no one would ever want to touch him like that. Whenever there would be moments of powerlessness and anger for him, he would accommodate for that in the form of violent, dominant, and often non-consensual sex. When this happens, he’ll become very talkative about how no one else can touch you like this and make you feel this good, but his actual objective is to make you feel smaller than him rather than to make either of you feel good. To be honest, he’s not very creative when it comes to sex, but when he feel like this he likes to hit you from the back in doggy style. That way, he feels more in control as he grips your hips and uses your body to fuck himself dry while also not feeling the vulnerability of having you look at his naked body. He will rip all of your clothes off while keeping himself as covered as possible. This is this another power move for him.

Hawks: Another one with a similar duality. He’s very touch starved due to isolation and he wants to feel your body against his. His absolute favorite sex position would be you sitting on his lap with either you facing him in a tight embrace while he slowly slides himself up and down your tight pussy, wrapping his wings around your exposed form or if you were to hit him from behind as he lays flat on the bed and you put your full weight on top of him. However, like Dabi, he will not voice this desire to you because of how self sacrificing he is and the fact that he would rather you feel protected by him than the other way around. Though he usually wants to be a bottom, he’s usually a very soft dom. He’s very careful not to hurt or overstimulate you and he prioritizes your pleasure over his own. Because of this, his most commonly used sex method is giving you very slow oral as you splay your body on the bed or couch and sling your legs over his shoulders.

Shigaraki: His favorite act is you body worshiping him as he power bottoms you, either slamming your hips down on his cock and fucking himself or controlling the tempo from the back. He simultaneously wants to be taken care of while also feeling the need to be in control. Because of this, though being a bottom would be the most pleasurable for him, he would not admit this to you and if he’s especially angry, empowered, or embarrassed, he’ll insist on being the dominant one. In times like these, he loves to fuck your face, pulling your hair back minus one finger in a non verbal threat to behave and worship him as he slams his hips down your throat and makes you gag.

Twice: Another one who wants to feel as close to you as possible. Any sex position or location won’t matter to him as long as you’re in a tight embrace that makes him feel your heart beat in your chest. If you even so much as loosen your hold or your arms get tired, his feelings will be hurt and he’ll begin to cry, begging you to just hold him.

Fatgum: As I’ve expressed before, yandere!fatgum has a bit of a weird relationship with gender roles even with a male s/o. I don’t specifically want to say that he’s sexist, he loves powerful and intelligent women, but he desperately wants to have the most average family you can imagine since he sees himself as the perfect father figure and you as the perfect mother figure. He wants to win the bread for you and your kids as you play the role of the main caregiver. Because of this, we wishes he could be a top, but he’s very much aware of his size and has a fear of crushing you, so he will never risk topping you. However, he finds other ways to feel more dominant like controlling the tempo of your thrusts. His absolute favorite thing is when he comes home from a tiring day at work and you gently pull out his enormous cock, doing your best to please him with your mouth as he sits back with a beer and lets you take care of the rest. Bonus points if whenever you come up for breath, you feed him food you’ve prepared for him. You have such a great way of taking care of him.

Stain: He is very dominant during sex and will never let you do any such thing as top him. In fact, he is the one who chooses when, where, and how you have sex. However, his immediate goal is to pleasure you rather than himself. His mindset is that he knows your body better than anyone else, including yourself, and if you say that you don’t want something you’re wrong because he knows that you do. His favorite thing to do is to use his quirk on you, making your body go limp so that he can use it however he sees fit. He doesn’t like to hurt you more than he sees necessary in cutting you for your blood, but he will mercilessly suckle and nipple at the wound in the hopes of any more blood seeping out of it. He has a blood kink, so he loves to do this while he lays you out on your side, resting your top leg between his thigh and hip as he sits upright on his knees and pounds into you from the side, filling you in the most foreign of ways while he gently grips your injured hand in his maw with an adoring look on his face. He also loves to give oral if and while you’re on your period.

Aizawa: While he mostly likes to be dominant, he is very shy about it and prioritizes your pleasure over his own, so if you want to do something else, he’d be flattered that you’d want to do anything with him at all. He’s also very affectionate during sex and will need to physically feel your shared adoration instead of just petty sexual longing. If you’re not either making intense and unbroken eye contact, softly caressing each other’s skin, or kissing in some way he wants nothing to do with it. His favorite position is when he straddles your hips as you lay down on the bed and he slides himself back and forth much too slowly while looking down at you with tears in his eyes. He also loves sleepy morning sex where you both cling to each other on your sides or spoon as he thrusts into you slowly while sucking on your neck. You always have to be facing each other or spooning.

Overhaul: Much like Stain, he is the soul person to decide when, where, and how you have sex. However, unlike Stain, he will not entertain the idea of caring to pleasure you as this is solely for the purpose of him letting his need for dominance and aggression out on you. He’s a germaphobe, so he won’t like anything messy like coming anywhere on your body besides your holes (pussy, ass, and mouth). You are never in control even in terms of oral and the only time you’re allowed to pleasure him with your mouth is if he’s fucking your face. If you get any drool on him or fail to swallow all of his cum, making a mess of yourself, he will drag you by your hair to the sink to wash your mouth out, saying how disappointed he is in you and how disgusting you are. Because of this, his favorite sex act is pounding into you against the shower wall as the water washes away any sweat, tears, or cum between the two of you. His idea of after care is scrubbing you with soap until you feel your skin tear. Just to be clear, he isn’t sadistic, he just doesn’t care about your comfort.

Miruko: She can’t get off on gentle sex and will always need to be violent towards you in one way or another. She has a very high sex drive, so she loves to overstimulate you and make you cum until you pass out. She loves choking you and picking you up over her shoulders just to show you how strong she is. However, she’s a sucker for a challenge and her favorite thing is for you to try to dominate her... Don’t actually succeed though or she’ll get Mad. She’s extremely creative with sex since she needs it often and she gets easily bored, but one thing that always remains the same is her dirty talk and teasing. She also very much enjoys is tying your hands up, edging you, and leaving the room before finishing you off. She thinks it’s hilarious.

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amandashaped · 2 years

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In progress. Still here, muddling through, trying to figure out how to prioritize my art when everything else in my life is demanding to come first. Still not sure what the trick is. I’ve been really enthralled by the human form lately, especially the female form, as I have not always been so keen on my own body. When I was younger it was difficult to embrace what I’d been dealt. The way that we treat young women in our culture made me feel so sapped of my own autonomy, like I was on display, like I had no control. Now I am capable of recognizing what a total waste of time that was. I love what this body of mine is, its utilitarian strength, its capacity for joy. I always get excited about these new avenues, and I hope that they will lead me in a new creative direction that will keep me energized until the next one. Let’s see?! (Also, fuck yeah, gold paint!) .

#typical girls fall under spells #work in progress #wip #illustration #art #illustrator #portrait #portrait artist #drawing #hand drawn #micron #marker #ink #speedball #watercolor #illustrators on tumblr #artists on tumblr

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brazilianism · 3 years

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Momento r/trueoffmychest but sometimes I feel like there's no future in Brazil. I want to be a writer but there's like 2 Brazilian writers who are even slightly famous outside and I've heard that here we only get 10% of the book's profit, which is frankly absurd. I love this country and I love my city and I don't think I could ever call anywhere else home and I really want to go to college for free because I think I can and USP has been my dream university since I was in 6th grade but I have absolutely no perspective of future here. My family even has Portuguese citizenship in case thinks go south and we have to leave. And then I look at what the future looks like outside and I know I'll have to deal with sexism that'll be even worse because they see Brazilian women as whores and possibly xenophobia which is totally insane for me because I'm white but the moment I say something all everyone will hear is a heavy Latino accent that I actually don't want to lose and on top of that there will be the usual homophobia since I'm a lesbian and it'll be really tiring. To top that, the only places where I can be a successful writer seem to be USA and England and even though I absolutely hate USA it is still in America and I kinda dislike England even more (many cases of racism against Brazilians, heard it's hard for a Latino to get a job). And if I go to USA, I'll have to deal with low minimum wage and rent that is impossible to pay and the fear of guns and I'll probably will end up in New York as a writer and it may be a place I really wanna visit but it does seem like an awful place to live unless you're loaded and I also kinda don't want to ever be homeless but it seems like an obligatory experience if you live in USA. So I have to ask. How do you do it? How can a Brazilian who wants more find a place in the world? I'm white and my parents went to college and have enough money to send me to a private high school and this was supposed to make all the doors open for me but really? I can only see the closed ones. And I know I shouldn't complain because it would be 100000% harder if I was black and poor but honestly right now I'm kinda hopeless. If I could choose what country to be born in, I would always choose Brazil, but I feel like being a Brazilian keeps me from being someone.

Shit girl, I get you. It was one of my earliest dreams to be a writer, too. And this might not be super motivational, but I haven't made it, lol but like i'm 24 so no big deal about it either. I mean, I still write my stories every now and then, but being a writer does take a LOT of effort and energy and especially at the times when I hit depressive episodes it was hard to put in all that effort. Luckly for myself I've been granted a head that is happy doing lot's of different stuff, so I've changed paths without it taking a big toll on me and decided to go into the movie/tv bussiness. First I was about to try scriptwriting but I learned scriptwriting takes a fuckton of techinique to learn and I'm not good at it (yet). So i'm more into production and other media areas (and it might be a bitch but there's always social media work around even if it sucks). And I mean, the movie/tv bussiness is also shitty and has huge amounts of competition AND is better in countries I dislike too, but in my head it felt "safer" cause it offers "secondary" jobs that will always be there. But like, that was what I thought at 17. Now I know that every profession has these jobs, you know, not the "dream" jobs, but the decent jobs around the area. So first thing I'd do if I were you would be to do some research in related areas. Like, I don't know, working on magazines as an editor, or journalism, or text review, or even social media work in the writing area (plenty of blogs and SEO to adjust out there), or publicity writing (someone is always hired just to write slogans and texts for billbords, you know), or even scriptwriting as I tried. It's not that you HAVE to follow any of these, but knowing that you could fall back upon any of these professions or work them part time while trying to write your books might give you some peace of mind to give it a try. Second thing I would do is to do more research on brazilian writers, because there are plenty. Yeah, not all of them are Paulo Coelho, but you don't have to be to be able to make a reasonable living or even to keep writing as a part time profession. Find those authors, follow them on social media, ask questions!! Most love to answer when they have time. But what I won't tell you to do is to stop writing, cause if there's one thing I know is that the only way to get better at writing (and ergo have more chances of succeeding) is to keep writing. And look, i'm not telling you this is by any means an easy field, or a regular job, and it's 100% okay to give up if you prioritize these things in life (i'm serious, mental health and peace of mind come first and there's NOTHING wrong with picking a profession that allows for these if that's the case), but what I know about most people that have an undeniable passion for doing something creative and pick something else without being really sure about it is that they always regret it. Most keep getting sucked back to it or end up miserable because they really wanted to be doing something else. So if it's your only dream, you passion for life, girl, you're super young. Your parents can give you a small headstart for a few years (aka you don't have to worry about getting any job in any field just to get by for now). So give it a try. Search the field. Try to put something together. Worst case scenario, you still learned something. It'll land you somewhere. Might even be a good place :)

#long post #advice #and my inbox is always open if you wanna talk about this more!!#writing #careers #personal

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wolfstar-in-color · 3 years

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June Creator Spotlight: BigBlackDog

Hello, colorful cuties, and welcome to our first creator spotlight!!

Each month, we will highlight a different creator in our lovely fandom who features diverse characterizations. We will invite you to get to know them better through questions and answers, Fandom Discourse(tm), and a featured prompt created by our guest!!!

For our first spotlight, we are more than pleased to highlight the incredible work of bigblackdog!!! See a little snippet of this wonderful interview below, along with bigblackdog’s prompt! Look below the cut for our complete interview. Don’t forget to share and interact with this post, and if you have anyone you’d like to recommend for a spotlight, shoot us an ask! You can find our first guest’s Tumblr here.

“I've experienced ups and downs in the wolfstar fandom. It often feels like the wolfstar fandom is willing to engage in discussion about every political issue but race. And the few people who are trying to talk about race consistently encounter this silence.”

bigblackdog’s prompt: I want to see more latino characters who are not impoverished or criminalized. Give me a joyful latino/e remus!

Hello, I'm bigblackdog! I'm almost 30, and I've been active in fandom on various platforms for about seven years now. I'm latina/e and live in the u.s. with a small white dog.

Q: How did you start creating in the fandom? What did you wish to bring into the fandom?

A: Like a lot of fans I started with self insert fic as a middle schooler. Sometimes the practice of self-insert gets ragged on in fandom, as if you're not doing real character work, but I think it's really cool. And if you're an under represented identity in the traditional western canon of literature, self insert is a radical practice. Making space for yourself in a story that refuses or ignores your identities is a radical act. And that's what i want to bring to fandom-- disruption and self care.

Q: What things about s/r as characters or in their relationship inspire you to create around them?

A: Wolfstar was the first queer ship I was introduced to. I wasn't someone who arrived in fandom with my own robust queer reading skills, I needed other queers to hold my hand and introduce me to queer ships and how to find them and build them. My interest in r/s was simply a clinging to queerness I wasn't finding in other places. I really think it could have been any characters, as long as they were queer.

Q: What things would you like to highlight about the Wolfstar fandom and your experience in it?

A: I've experienced ups and downs in the wolfstar fandom. It often feels like the wolfstar fandom is willing to engage in discussion about every political issue but race. And the few people who are trying to talk about race consistently encounter this silence. It's hard not to feel bitter. But i've also met some amazing people and overall feel that fans really are trying their best to be welcoming and inclusive.

Q: What type of content do you wish you saw more in the fandom?

A: I want to see more discourse that aims at amplifying underrepresented voices like wolfstar-in-color. I want to see more fans of color joyfully and irreverently writing themselves into the magical world!

Q: What is your favourite wolfstar fancontent (fic/fanart/gifset/etc) and how does it inspire you?

A: I love dontthinkonithermione's rp. Not only does she do an amazing nerdy know it all Hermione, she envisions Black characters in every corner of the hp world. Have you seen her Hogwarts p.e. professor rps? i love the space she creates for herself, and the joy she does it with.

Q: Which of your own identities inform your creative processes? How has that process been for you?

A: I started out in fandom really trying to feel out the nooks and crannies of being queer. As i've spent more time in fandom and become more confident in my queerness I've started looking closer at some of my other identities-- Latina, mixed, adhd-- and how i can squeeze them into the hp world. For a long time it was hard, especially with being Latine and mixed, to envision how that identity could belong in a 90s British boarding school in the Scottish wilderness. I also really struggled with the feeling that i would get "diversity" wrong. I’ve also struggled with feeling like I have to write diversity because i'm an underrepresented voice. Brown people are often pressured to do the work of educating white people about racism and in fandom spaces that often means pressure to write the reality of racism instead of the fantasy that white writers get to play with. And sometimes i just want to write a pwp without worrying about the revolution, you know? But i really love fandom for its refusal to play by the rules of capitalism and canon, eventually i started to feel like putting more of myself into my writing was another rule i could break.

Q: What advice do you have for other content creators with diverse backgrounds in the fandom? What would you say to people that might feel they don’t have the “right” history/experience/characteristics to participate in the creation of content related to Wolfstar?

First, there's a lot of content on tumblr that aims to silence your voice, learn how to recognize the difference between cancel culture and encouragement. Sometimes content that seems well meaning still presents writing diversity as a list of black and white rules (and virtue signaling) instead of encouragement for underrepresented voices to share their own messy experience. Set those rules gently aside. Second, fandom is built on the idea that the author isn't the only person who gets to play. we all get to play. It doesn't always feel like we were invited, but the great thing about fandom is there is no barrier to entry, no prior experience or publishing hoops to jump through. This is our playground too. If canon is dead then why can't our stories be brown and queer and neurodivergent? Third, find your people. i've found that having just one other person to talk about race with has made the whole space feel more welcoming.

Q: How could we build a more diverse fandom?

A: We have to stop prioritizing white and cis male voices. We recognize that policing irl is a problem inextricable from whiteness and maleness, but we don't see that fandom policing online is also a problem deeply embedded in whiteness and maleness. White and cis male people frequently use their discomfort with difficult topics to change the subject from a critical discussion to one that prioritizes their white and/or male feelings. The same thing happens online when personal discomfort is used to cancel or undermine content that's challenging to a white or male voice. White and cis male voices are used to having their needs met above others. And we still cater to that in fandom spaces when we privilege 'fetishization' discourse over racial discourse. When we lift up bipoc and women/trans/nb voices and the issues they're concerned with we'll make fandom a more welcoming place for underrepresented voices.

Q: What’s your favourite thing to modify in Sirius’s or Remus’s characterizations to bring new perspectives to them?

A: It really depends on the story i'm writing and what issue i'm trying to figure out. Sometimes i need Sirius to be Adhd to come to terms with my brain, sometimes i need two brown boys to fall in love and be happy against all odds.

Q: What does diversity mean to you? What does that encompass in fannish spaces?

A: This is a hard question! I tend to think of diversity as those voices that are disenfranchised or pushed to the margins. And fannish spaces have all the same hierarchies and blind spots as other spaces. In fannish spaces there's the idea that you can curate your experience to some extent, but for marginalized voices, at least in my experience, no matter how much you curate the marginalization is still there.

Q: What are your ideas about the notions of culture and ethnicity? How do you relate to those notions?

A: There was a time in my life where relating to my ethnicity was largely a process of recognizing larger systems of oppression and how they worked against my various identities. And for a while it was a really helpful way to frame my experiences. Now I feel a little less attached to ethnicity as like, a monolithic concept threaded through my whole life and more attached to the small things that I enjoy about my ethnicity and culture-- making a really good pot of beans, for example.

Q: Leave us with a quote or work of art that always inspires you.

A: "Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare." Audre Lorde

#creator spotlight #bigblackdog #bigblackdogfic #wolfstar #fandom #diversity

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