#i was gonna make her send him a flower crown but where would she get flowers from

[jonathan-samuel-smith]

Lord Jon and Prince Damian is a funny combination because just imagine Clark never managed to conquer all earth because magic and magic user, Talia basically built a huge kingdom to protect her people from the Lords and also accepts some others who are fleeing.

Years past and Jon has always been curious about that place and laughs when he faces Talia's youngest soldiers. He falls in love deeply hard about that boy with green eyes, then Jon starts to try to seduce that cute and smol boy (and Damian hates him deeply)

Just imagine:

Jon: *throws a body at his door like a cat*

Damian: ... Some guys bring flowers

Jon: I'm not 'some guy'

And also

J: "i've killed for you. how many other people can say that?"

D: "... Multiple, actually"

Basically: Lord Jon's love language is being annoying

Took me a while to figure out how I'd write the Super Lords, but eventually I was inspired by another work. I might write a sequel to this but we'll see. Fic under the cut.

Jon was scrolling on his phone, looking to find people talking negatively about him or his father so he could send them death threats. He could probably find them easily and make good on those threats, but then he'd have to get up, and he was comfortable where he was. He was getting a little peckish though, so he might run through a couple if he got up to eat.

His dad came into the room looking flawless. “Jon.”

“Hey dad, can you get me something to eat?”

“What? No. Get it yourself, or better yet, ask Kelex.”

“I thought you took away my voice commands after I killed the wrong general last week.”

“Oh, right. Have the knowledge crystals not taught you how to hack yet?”

Jon groaned ”I hate the knowledge crystals dad, they take so much time. I don't see the point in them.”

“The point is they would teach you how to solve problems, like how to reinstate your voice commands in Kelex’s code. Now get up, I have something important for you to do.”

Jon got up and stretched. “Oh I'm way hungrier than I thought. Hold that thought, Dad.”

“Jona–” Kal started sternly as a gust of wind blew past him. He could hear Jon ferociously consuming junk food from the pantry in superspeed. When he was done, he ran back up to his dad.

“Hey Dad, I'm back. What's up?”

“What do you know about Talia Al Ghul?”

“Oh that's easy. She's like, your archnemesis. Her family's got really strong magic so she can kill us if she gets close enough. She controls the last stronghold of human resistance. She's older than you so she's, what, a million?” He grinned cheekily “Just kidding, Dad. You don't look a day over 500.” He laughed. “Kidding! You should see the look on your face.”

“Jon, I'm being serious here.”

“‘kay.”

“She's just crowned her heir, Prince Damian. He's your age.”

“Oh?”

“He's an even more powerful mage than his mother, and trained in martial arts. He is a serious threat, one that needs to be neutralized.”

“Ok, but how am I gonna do that? You said he's more powerful than his mom, and you can't kill her.”

“He takes his group of soldiers into the Himalayas every month to train privately. I want you to ambush them.”

“Kill them, right? How do you want them dead?”

“Doesn't matter.”

“Alright. I'll be right back.”

Kal grabbed his arm and dug his fingers in hard enough to bruise. “You could die today, Jon. Take this seriously. Run away if you need to. You're no good to me dead.”

Jon nodded. “Got it.”

Jon flew to the mountains and looked for them with his heat vision. He found them fighting each other and flew down and started snapping the neck of the closest person to him. Unfortunately, this was slow enough to draw alarm from the other assassins, who all knew magical attacks. Still, Jon was quick and he fought dirty, letting out a deafening shout and causing an avalanche. The teens fought him with martial arts married with magic, sacrificing their lives so that the final assassin could defeat Jon and place him in magical bindings.

He spat blood. “You're lucky they can be brought back to life, or I wouldn't have spared yours.”

“I didn't ask you to. But thank you– not for sparing my life, but for beating me. I've never lost before. It was exhilarating! Can you do it again?”

The boy looked at him strangely. “What?”

Jon grinned manically. “You're a great fighter. I want you to defeat me again. And again and again until I get bored. What's your name? I never even lose to my dad.”

“... I am prince Damian Al Ghul.”

“Oh no way! I came here to kill you! Well, I'm not doing that anymore.”

“Clearly not.” Damian said, gesturing to the chains around him.

“Oh no, not cuz of that. I meant cuz like–” Jon cut himself off as Damian took off his mask and piercing green eyes met his own. “Wow, you're really pretty. I've never seen anyone as pretty as you in my whole life. Definitely not prettier. I think I was saying something?”

Damian blushed. “Tt. You were saying why you're not going to kill me.”

“I think I'm in love with you.”

“What?!” Damian squeaked.

“That was so cute! You're so cute! You're so small you look like you'd fit just right in my arms!”

“Go back to the ‘I love you’ part because I'm not understanding!” He shouted.

“I'll say it as many times as you want! I love you, I love you, iloveyouiloveyouiloveyoui–”

“Stop! You can't love me, you just met me, and your dad is superman!”

“Um, I'm pretty sure I can. Love at first sight is a thing, and I've known you for longer than that already.”

“So what, just because you think I'm pretty and I beat you for the first time, you're in love with me?”

“Is that not enough? Ok well, I really like the color of your eyes, and you're really powerful, and you make me feel so many feelings I have never felt before! Fear, excitement, curiosity, admiration, respect, awe, happiness, arousal–”

“Stop talking.”

“Whatever you want, gorgeous.”

“That's talking.”

“Oh, right. Sorry.”

“Still talking.”

“I don't know how you want me to stop talking if you keep talking to me. Oh but uh, don't stop, I like it.”

Damian facepalmed. “I'm taking you back to my mother.”

“Oh I hope she doesn't decide to kill me after you went through the trouble of sparing me, that would be really embarrassing for you.”

Damian was quiet for a few minutes. “...You've never felt curious? Or excited, or afraid or happy? Really?”

Jon shrugged. “Maybe once. But nowadays I'm always either bored or bloodthirsty. Except right now, I'm neither. You're the most interesting person I've ever met and I just killed 5 people. That's like, 1 more than I usually do in a day.”

Damian set his jaw hard. “Why do you kill so many people?”

“Why do you think, assassin Prince? To feel alive.”

“...Who do you usually kill?”

“Dissidents and criminals. My dad's okay if they're dissidents or criminals. There's not, like, a ton of those out there anymore, though, so I've taken to scrolling back really far on Twitter. Oh, and jaywalkers.”

“Tt. Typical.”

“Who do you usually kill?”

“Political enemies, soldiers, criminals.”

“I guess everyone's a political enemy when they're aligned with us and not you. That's a lot more people you can kill. I kinda wanna join your side now.”

“We don't kill frivolously.”

“Why not?”

“Because we value human life.”

“Why?”

“What do you mean, why? Why does your father care about order if not to preserve human life?”

Jon laughed. “My dad doesn't care about humans! He just wanted to tidy things up. He gets mad when I kill other people because it messes with his system. It's one of those dumb parent rules, like keeping your socks in the sock drawer, or cleaning the fortress on Sundays even though we have robot servants.”

“... You're completely insane.”

“Do you want me not to be?”

Damian furrowed his brow. “Why are you asking me that?”

“I want you to get what you want! You deserve to get anything you want, way more than my dad does. I bet you could with your magic! Cast a spell on me, make me sane for you. If you want that, I want it.”

“It's Jonathan, isn't it?”

“Yeah, or you can call me Jon. Or you know, whatever you want. Even if it's mean, I can take it.”

“...Jonathan. I don't want to take your agency away with my magic. That wouldn't be right.”

Jon shrugged against his chains. “If you say so, my prince.” Damian was quiet for a while, and Jon slipped free of his chains to help Damian cart back all of the bodies. “You should let me carry this.”

“What– Jon?! How did you escape my bindings?”

“Magic interacts completely unpredictably with me.”

“I don't– why are you even still here?”

“Why would I leave? It's not as if there's anything more interesting on TV. Twitter says all the shows are boring cuz of Dad. Well, you know, the dead side of Twitter. God do you know how perfect you look? From every angle?”

“Jon, I think you should just leave.”

“Well, my dad is expecting me home soon. What do you think I should tell him about you not being dead?”

“... Is he going to hurt you if you go back?”

Jon shrugged. “If I let him. Which I probably will, so I don't get grounded. But I might be grounded anyway since this meant a lot to him. If I don't get grounded, can I see you again?”

“It's best if you don't.”

“I'm going to be honest, I don't like that answer. If you want me to stay away you'll have to use your magic to harm me.”

“Tt. Do you have a death wish?”

“No. My biggest wish is for you to spar with me and win.”

“What if I lose?”

“Then we'll go again until you win.”

“...Hm. You're very… persistent.”

Jon grinned. “Thanks. Wow, it feels really good when you compliment me. Do it again.”

“Um… you have really unique eyes?”

Jon beamed. “This is great, keep going!”

Damian blushed. “I'd rather not.”

Jon pouted. “Pleeeeaaase? I'll do anything.”

“Will you go home?”

“Fine, yes, after… 3 more compliments. Then I'll go home, for now.”

“Tt. Your curls look very nice, your hair makes a nice contrast against your skin tone and you– ah… you… that is, you're very strong.”

“I already knew that last one.”

“I meant muscular.”

“That's not a compliment, that's just a fact.”

Damian’s ears burned. “...I like it. I like that about you. I like that you're muscular. It looks… visually appealing.”

“Oh, I'm definitely in love with you. I'd love to stay and compliment you back, but I said I'd leave, and I want you to trust me! If you ever need me, or just want me, all you have to do is call. I'll come.”

Jon flew back home. “Dad? I ambushed him, caused an avalanche, and killed his squad, but he still beat me.” Jon called out.

Kal walked out to see his son. “You look unharmed. Why did he let you go?”

“Honestly? I think I annoyed him too much. But I'm going back tomorrow.”

“I see… an ambush didn't work, so you'll have to gain his trust and then betray him. I was going to punish you but your tenacity and cunning deserve a reward, so it is simpler to do nothing.

“Oh, yeah, psh, that's totally why I want to go back. I totally want to murder him in cold blood. I mean, you know how much I love murder.”

Kal frowned. “I do know. It gets in the way of your studies. However, this time I approve.”

“‘kay. Thanks. See ya.” He went back to his room to watch Damian with his X-ray vision.

The next day, Jon went to Nanda Parbat and watched Damian from the sky, waiting until he was alone to approach him.

Damian’s hair was slicked back with sweat and he was flushed and panting.

“Prince Damian. You look somehow even more incredible than last time.”

“Spare me the mockery.”

“What? I'm not mocking you. The way your skin flushes and glistens is as enchanting as any of your spells, my lord.”

“Hn. You know most humans find sweat repulsive?”

“I'm only half human. Also, you smell great. Musky. Can I lick you?”

“Definitely not.” Jon pouted. “Do you want something?”

“Yeah. Can we spar?”

“After lunch. Would you like to dine with me?”

“Can I? Won't the servants see me?”

“I cook for myself.”

Jon gasped. “I get to try your cooking?! Yes!” He pumped his fist in the air.

Damian chuckled good naturedly.

Jon leaned against the island as Damian cooked. “What did your dad say about you failing to kill me?”

“Oh I told him I was going back today and he thought I meant that I was going to gain your trust to kill you.” Damian stiffened. “So I'm going to let him think that so I can spend more time with you.”

“Try this.” Damian said, handing Jon a spoonful of sauce. Jon tasted it.

“Hm, that's pretty good! I've never had this before.”

Damian tasted it himself and nodded. “It is good.”

Jon ate at his usual impatient pace and spent the rest of the meal talking at Damian.

“Alright, Superboy, follow me.”

“Anywhere.”

“Tt.” Damian led him to the training courtyard. “Here we are. Remember to be quiet.”

Jon rushed to tackle Damian but he predicted it and dodged, casting a spell to slow down Jon’s movements. It was a lot stronger than the spell Damian intended to cast, and he moved like a sloth. “Wow prince…” he began as Damian took his time pinning Jon to the ground and immobilizing him with a spell. The first spell wore off quicker than expected. “...Damian you're so fast! Oh, it's already over!” Jon giggled. “You did even better this time! I suppose it's to be expected since it wasn't an ambush. You're really impressive…” Jon sighed dreamily, looking up into Damian’s eyes with a lovestruck gaze.

Damian coughed and looked away. “...You wanted me to beat you. Did you go easy on me?”

“I can honestly say that didn't even occur to me. I don't know why I would do that. Would it have made you happy?”

“Hell no. It would have made me angry.”

Jon smiled. “I'd like to see you angry. Maybe I will next time. Though I don't know if you'd even notice, considering how well you beat me this time.”

Damian looked confused. “Why would you want me to be angry?”

Jon raised a brow. “‘Cause I wanna see how you look when you're angry. I've never seen it before. I wonder if it would make me angry, too. I never get angry anymore.”

“You're… impossible.”

Jon grinned toothily. “Is that a good thing?”

“... I haven't decided.” Damian got off of Jon, much to the younger teen’s disappointment, and did a nullification spell on Jon before helping him up. Jon smirked and flipped Damian over his shoulder as he stood, but Damian landed on his feet and cast a sleeping spell on Jon. He woke him up with a water spell, sitting on his chest.

“You got me again! I love you.”

“You're weird.”

“Is that bad?”

“I haven't decided.”

Jon smiled, crinkling his eyes. “Wanna go again?”

Damian laughed. “Sure. I've not even worked up a sweat yet.”

The next time he came to Nanda Parbat he threw down a corpse in front of Damian, face still splattered in blood.

Damian sighed. “Most guys bring flowers.”

“I'm not ‘most guys’”

“Who was he?”

“He criticized your looks so I killed him for you.”

“Jon, I don't care what anyone says about me.”

Jon's eyes flashed red. “I care that he said that. Now he can't say anything like it ever again. What do you think of my technique?”

“Messy, but efficient.”

Jon smiled “Thank you. Do you want to spar?”

“Jon it's 11:38 at night.”

“... Is that a problem?”

“I was sleeping.”

“Oh. Can I join you?”

“Tt. No. Go home.”

Jon pouted. Damian held firm.

“Okay. I'll miss you.”

“Tt. You say such embarrassing things. Goodnight.”

Jon smiled, then quickly leaned in to kiss Damian’s cheek. “Good night, my love.”

Damian slammed the door in his face.

It became somewhat of a pattern for Jon to ambush Damian when he went out on missions, and Damian learned to expect it. Jon was getting faster at killing Damian’s compliment.

“I killed them, so we can be alone!” Jon said cheerfully, gently touching Damian’s cheeks with his bloody fingers and looking at him adoringly.

“Jon. Keep your hands to yourself before I cut them off.” He said, drawing his rune-encrusted sword slightly out of the scabbard.

Jon pouted but removed his hands. “As you wish, my lord. So, what are you out here for today?”

“I was planning on retrieving a magical relic from a temple to the east of here, until you showed up. You’re like a gnat.”

“I can get it for you!”

“Tt, I’m sure you can’t, there are magical booby traps.”

Jon pouted. “I want to do this for you. Please?”

“Jon, I am certain that if you were deathly injured my mother would not permit me to put your body in the lazarus pit.”

“Not even if I died saving your life?”

“Likely not. I shouldn't even be talking to you, you are the enemy.”

Jon grinned. “I guess we both like to do whatever we want.”

“It is human nature to desire freedom.”

“Well yeah but I'm not human.”

“You are as human as you are kryptonian. I wonder, did your father have the same disregard for your mother as with the rest of humanity?”

“I dunno. I was cloned from her dead body and my dad. I never saw them interact. But I know he loved her, and I know he misses her. He's told me it's the only reason he puts up with me.”

“It does not sound like you are very close.”

“We aren't. But he's the only other kryptonian other than Kara Zor-el so y'know, he's important. Not as important as you, of course, but he was previously the most important person in my life.”

“We're here. Don't follow me.”

Jon floated after him. “But I wanna keep you safe! Let me carry you.”

“No– Jon, put me down!”

Jon grinned and flew Damian in. “What's it look like? I can look through the walls for you.”

“Unneeded, I have a map.”

Jon swiped the map from him and read it. “I have a great sense of direction, don't worry.”

“You are infuriating.”

“We cause strong emotions in each other~ how lovely. Okay, hold tight.”

Jon flew quickly down the halls, before being knocked into the wall by a magical hammer. Damian rolled off of him as Jon groaned in pain. “You idiot. Where are we?”

Jon grunted and pointed to their location on the map.

“I can’t even cast a healing spell on you as I have no idea how it will effect you.”

“Don't worry… I have super healing… so the side that hit the wall will be fine. The wall isn't magic, right?”

Damian checked. “Luckily for you, it is regular stone.”

Jon grinned. “Help me up? I wanna help you finish this.”

“It's a bad idea. We need to get you out of here.”

Jon shook his head. “I'm not going. I'll be right behind you. You can handle the magic traps, and I can fly in front of an arrow for you or something.”

“And what if it's a magical arrow?”

“I'll die for you. Did I not mention that?”

“Tt. You're dangerous to have around. But if you're not leaving…” Damian got out a rope and tied them together by their waists with a length of rope in between them. “Stick close to me.”

Jon floated to his feet. “Mkay. Let's go!”

Damian sighed and pulled along a floating Jon. He disabled the traps as they went until they reached the chamber with the artifact. Damian picked it up and the room shook with a deep voice.

“To get out of trouble, face your double. Return the staff to the rack and it will end the attack.”

Smoke billowed out of the air vents and coalesced into shadow versions of Jon and Damian. Damian sighed and took out his katana.

Jon and Damian fought back to back as their shadow versions worked independently. Damian took out his double and Jon defeated his own. The smoke dissipated and Jon cheered.

“We did it! That was awesome! They didn’t stand a chance against our teamwork! Imagine if you came in here with your whole squad! That would have been so much chaos, I really did you a favor by killing them.”

Damian growled and pressed his sword to Jon’s throat, backing him up against the wall. “No. Killing.”

“Mhn, so it's fine if you kill me but not if I kill your squad, who as we've previously established can come back to life whereas I will not?”

“I will kill you if I have to.”

“I would expect nothing less, my prince.” Jon smiled slightly. “So this is what you look like when you're angry. I love the intensity in your eyes.”

Damian narrowed his eyes. “Are you really trying to de-escalate the situation by flirting?”

Jon shook his head as much as he could. “Just saying what I think, my lord. And I think you look beautiful.”

Damian sighed and withdrew his blade. “You're an idiot.”

Jon smiled cheerily and let Damian drag him along by the rope still attached to his waist. Damian escorted Jon back to the entrance of the temple and cut the rope. “You need to stop killing my team every time I leave the palace. It makes me look incompetent.”

“Do you get in trouble?”

“Not exactly, no–”

“Then it's fine!”

Damian pinched the bridge of his nose. “Listen to me carefully. I am telling you that I want you to stop killing my team. Did you not say that I deserve to get what I want?”

“You're turning my words against me! I just want to be with you. Your assassins would never allow it. If I don't defeat them, I'll die.” Jon whined.

“Then learn non-lethal techniques of taking people down. Practice on those criminals or whatever.”

“You want me to… not kill a criminal?”

“Yes.”

“I can try… can I still be violent?”

“I would appreciate it if you did not scar my team too badly. But outside of that, you can be as brutal as you like as long as they do not die.”

“Okay. I will practice not killing and come back to you. Farewell, my prince.”

“Farewell, lord Jonathan.” Damian said as Jon lifted off into the sky, the cut rope rippling in the wind with his cape.

Jon stormed through the palace towards Damian, knocking people out of the way like flies. “Prince Damian! I came back, as I said I would.”

“Yes, I can see that. Are you here to kill more of my people? You know I cannot allow that, Lord Jonathan.”

Jon cocked his head. “Why would I do that? I don’t care about humans.”

Damian quirked a brow. “I am human.”

“You’re better than everyone else, though.”

“Is that so?”

Jon giggled. “Yeah, I think you could even kill me if you tried. That’s so hot. Look at you, not attacking me right now… so romantic...” Jon sighed.

Damian tutted. “I’m beginning to regret that.”

Jon giggled. “Some days I think I love you so much I'd just let you. Would you like me to do that? Or would you want a fight?” He came closer.

“What kind of question is that?”

“A genuine one. Oh… If I tried to kill you, I hope you’d try to kill me too… maybe we could die at the same time. If I am going to die, I want it to be by your hand. And no one else deserves to take your life away but me, and only if you asked me to.” He giggled, twirling his hair. “I really like having you around, so you would have to convince me first, or else I wouldn’t even let you kill yourself.” Jon hummed. “But I don’t see you convincing me that this world is so terrible as to deserve to be ridden of such beauty.” He stroked Damian’s cheek with a gloved hand, and Damian smacked it away. Jon sighed. “I love you.”

“You don’t know what love means. Your father never showed you.”

“I don’t? Well then, you’ll have to teach me. No one else will do.”

Damian tutted, before sighing as if greatly put upon and offering his ring for Jon to kiss. He did so gladly, kneeling at his feet.

“My prince.” Jon held Damian’s hand by the wrist and turned it over so he could nuzzle into his palm. Damian allowed it. Jon locked his violet eyes on Damian’s emerald ones. He kissed his fingertips one by one.

“You are so devoted to me. It’s perplexing.”

Jon kissed his wrist. “It’s simple; the whole earth should bow to you. You are perfection. Every moment you spend with me is pure gold; my greatest treasures.Or maybe it is that I can take anything in the world that I want, except for you. You are the only thing I could ever rightfully earn. The only goal worth pursuing. Everything was meaningless and dull until I met you, my Prince.”

Damian cupped his cheek. “And what if you got me? What then? Do you truly believe that to be love?”

“I would work to keep you and to serve you, to make you happy.” He smiled. “To annoy you, to pester you, to laugh with you, to see you cry. To hold you. To learn everything there is to know about you until you’ve changed so much that I have to learn you all over again.” He sniffed Damian’s wrist, at the cologne there, and deeper at all the smells that made up Damian. “Intoxicating.” Jon puffed out a laugh. “I don’t know what love is supposed to be like. Have I got it wrong? Do you think it matters? I ask out of curiosity, ‘cause even if it were really something completely morally unacceptable to you, I wouldn't care. It feels better than anything ever has. It’s what I live for.”

Damian’s lips parted in surprise. He schooled his features to ask his next question. “How many people have you killed since I last saw you?”

“None.” Jon smiled. “I’m learning, see? I can do better. I must be of some use to you, haven’t I?”

Damian got a strange look in his eye just then, and Jon became excited at the prospect of learning that expression. “Get up.”

Jon wilted. “Have I offended you, my Prince?”

Damian shook his head. “Stand up. Don’t. Float.”

Jon bowed his head obediently and stood up. Damian stepped close and put his hand on Jon’s shoulder, pulling him down into a slow and gentle kiss. Jon did not know his heart could race so fast. Damian pulled away with an unreadable look in his eye. “Alright, Jon. I accept. I will teach you how to love.”

Jon beamed. “Oh, this is so much better than murder.” He whispered.

Damian smirked. “It is, isn’t it? A lot of things are.” Damian took his hand off of Jon’s shoulder and put both behind his own back.

“Could you excuse me for just one moment? I feel the urge to go fly.”

Damian nodded, and Jon flew off, laughing brightly like a child.

Jon returned a moment later. “I love you! It feels so triumphant!” Jon gasped. “Does this mean we are dating? Boyfriends?!”

“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but yes. My mother will not be pleased.”

“I can kill her for you, if you wan’t.”

Damian glared at him. “No. No Killing.”

Jon looked at him for a long time. “Okay… Okay. But if someone tries to kill you, I won’t spare them. Even if you get mad at me. Even if you don’t believe my explanation. Even if you can take care of yourself. I promise, I won’t let you die.”

Damian scowled. “Just…kiss me, you idiot.”

Jon flew to his side in an instant, but was much more apprehensive about actually kissing him, so Damian grabbed his head and dragged their mouths together. Jon purred and pulled him closer. Damian nibbled on Jon’s bottom lip and he gasped. “Damian!”

“Yes?”

“You’ve done this before! And I can’t kill whoever you did it with!”

“You don’t have worry, they are already dead.”

“Woah, do you kill people instead of breaking up with them?”

“Tt, no. They betrayed me. I made an example of them.”

“Wow, I can’t imagine killing you if you betrayed me.”

“Hm. I can’t say it was pleasant, but— we are supposed to be kissing right now, Jonathan.” He pulled him in for a few more smooches.

“Is this part of learning how to love?” Jon asked dazedly.

“No, this is for me. I’m just glad I found a way to shut you up.”

“Dami! That’s–” More kissing. “That’s mean. I love it when you’re mean to me.”

They had their arms wrapped around each other by now. Damian rubbed between Jon’s shoulder blades. “You really shouldn’t.”

“Nobody is ever mean to me but you! How could I not like it? I love when you give me attention.”

“To have everyone afraid of you, your whole life… Let’s change that, hm? You are terrifying in the way that you move, talk, smile, laugh, and behave… But we should be able to change at least two of those.”

“Am I so scary, even to you?”

“No, not to me. You’re even… cute.”

“Isn’t that a bad thing?”

Damian furrowed his brow. “No, why would it be?”

“My father always told me to stop acting so cute, that it was distracting.”

“Everything about you is distracting. You’re currently distracting me from my work. I didn’t think you cared.”

Jon smiled. “You’re right, I don’t. And like I said, you can be mean to me, as long as you don’t ignore me. Well, even if you tried to ignore me, I’d cover your eyes until you had to acknowledge me. Or… maybe I could bite you, like Krypto used to do when I was little and I’d ignore him. Hm… come to think of it, you did just say I was distracting, I’m sure there are lots of ways I could get your attention. I like being distracting.”

Damian arched a brow. “Surely you’ll allow me to get my work done.”

“Well, that’s not ignoring me ‘cause you’re mad! So it’s fine. I can just watch you.”

“Do you watch me when you leave?”

Jon nodded. “And I strain my ears to listen. I love the sound of your voice, my prince.”

“Oh Jonathan, your life cannot only be me. I want you to stay in the palace so I can show you other things you might find meaningful.”

“Like what?”

“Friendship, learning to cook, making art. Things that are worthwhile because of the struggle. I think you will enjoy pottery.”

“What's so interesting about making pots? Plenty of people can do that.”

“They can do it because they put in the work, and they are better than you at it. Don't you want to impress me with an excellent piece of pottery?”

“You would like it if I gave you something I made?”

“Jon, the only person who can make the art that you would make is you. If you do not make it, it will never be known. You can give me something no one else can.”

“Who cares? Everyone will say they love it so I don't singe their eyebrows off…”

Damian arched a brow. “I won't.”

Jon blushed and smiled at Damian. “That's right, you're not afraid to tell me what you think. You're my equal.”

“I may even decide to encourage you with kisses.”

Jon rumbled a purr. “I love you. I'm going to make you the best pot ever.”

Damian kissed him again. “Good. I eagerly await it.”

[gamerwoo]

Wonwoo: Drawings

Characters: Wonwoo x reader (featuring chanyeol)

Genre/warnings: florist!Wonwoo x tattoo artist!reader, angst, a little bit of fluff in between, some crack, and mild violence????

Word count: 3,822

Summary: He definitely doesn’t look like it, but Wonwoo loves tattoos. He usually wears sweaters to cover his tattoo-clad arms when he works at the small flower shoppe in town, but on one of his days off, he goes to the new tattoo shop down the street, and runs straight into the girl he accidentally punched in the face the night before. (Idea was half created by @ripperoonii)

Wonwoo didn’t necessarily like to spend his time at bars, but it was Seungcheol’s birthday and he was his best friend; he wasn’t going to miss his best friend’s birthday. So, he was dragged to some dive bar a few blocks away from the flower shoppe he worked at.

“Congrats on being another year closer to death.” Jihoon deadpanned, holding his glass up a bit before taking a sip in some sort of half-assed cheers.

“Wow, good one.” Wonwoo chuckled, taking a sip of his whiskey.

“Thanks.” Seungcheol gave him a fake smile before his face immediately dropped all form of emotion. “Dick.”

Their group of friends snorted and chortled, slapping the eldest playfully on the back. It was rare for all of them to be together, so even with Jihoon’s sarcastic comment, they were still cheery just from gathering all together for once.

As Wonwoo watched Jeonghan finish his drink and wave the bartender over for another, most of the group’s attention had drifted over to a scene being caused by the pool table. The yelling between two men was getting louder and louder, causing most of the patrons of the bar to look over at what was happening. Even Jeonghan and the bartender had frozen and peered over to see what was going on.

“You cheated!” one of the large, burly men slurred.

The other man -- just as tall, but not really as scary-looking other than the tattoos and red hair -- just scoffed and rolled his eyes, spinning the pool stick in his hand. “Did not, you giant pussy. Stop your bitching and pay up.”

Wonwoo hated conflict. It wasn’t that he was a softy, he just chose to avoid confrontation because he believed fighting was pointless. Especially at some bar where two big guys were about to battle it out, he wasn’t having it. He had work tomorrow, and the last thing he needed was a black eye. He ran a flower shoppe for crying out loud!

“I think it’s about time I-”

Wonwoo’s goodbye was cut off by one of the men insulting you -- a shorter -- well, shorter than him -- but still very intimidating girl that was there with the man that was accused of cheating. 

“Take your slut and get out!” the man had shouted.

You simply looked at the man who spat the comment toward you, rolled your eyes, and went back to your drink. However, Wonwoo’s blood was boiling. There were three things he didn’t tolerate: mistreatment of animals, mistreatment of children, and mistreatment of women. While he didn’t want to get involved, he could make an exception for any of those three things.

You weren’t bothered by the comment. Your coworker -- the one in the fight -- brought you to this bar so many times that you were used to the disgusting men and even more dirty comments made toward you. But you could hold your own, and you definitely looked it with the tattoos inked into your skin, and the piercings in your nose, eyebrow, and trailing up and down your ears.

However, this idiot in a denim jacket, black jeans, and white t-shirt seemed to think otherwise as he stood up from the bar and glared at the man yelling at you and your coworker. “Why don’t you fuck off, huh?”

Wonwoo looked thin, and the only things he had going for him to make him even slightly intimidating were his height and his resting bitch face. You thought it looked like a puppy trying to take on a full-grown dog. This would only end one way, and you’d have to be the one to break it up since everyone else was always too worked up. It wouldn’t be your first fight, anyway.

“Why don’t you mind your business, kid?” the man sniggered, looking Wonwoo up and down. “Leave this to the real men, yeah?”

“Real men don’t treat women like that.” Wonwoo stated, walking forward.

“Real men don’t come to this bar.” you muttered under your breath, rolling your eyes for the umpteenth time.

“Should we ditch before this gets worse?” your coworker asked.

You and your friend, Chanyeol worked at a tattoo shop a few blocks away. Chanyeol didn’t normally look it considering his cute face, but he was muscular and terrifying in fights. You’d seen him with split lips and black eyes too many times to count -- even a broken nose a few times. But he was your best friend, and you’d take care of him no matter how many times he said the wrong thing to the wrong person.

You were just thankful he had some sense in him now.

But unfortunately, you didn’t have any. “Nah, I should stick around and help this poor kid when he gets his ass handed to him.”

Even though it wasn’t really your fight, this stranger was helping you and defending you, so you felt like you should help him out of this mess. That’s why when you noticed the two men standing toe-to-toe, you pushed yourself away from the pool table and put yourself between the two men.

Right as Wonwoo was pulling his fist back at a comment about you that the burly man had made.

“Alright, break it-” your words were cut off with a sharp blow to your nose and cheek, “Argh, fuck!”

You stumbled backwards, into a pool table that you used to lean against as you pressed both hands to the center of your face. You would already feel the warmth from the blood that was dripping down to your lip, and your eyes watered from the pain. But you didn’t cry, thankfully.

“___-ah!” Chanyeol shouted.

The man who punched you -- he was surprisingly strong despite how lanky he looked -- gasped, staring at you wide-eyed. “I-I...I’m so sorry!”

“Hyung!” Chan whined from where he sat at the bar, already sufficiently drunk. “I can’t believe you did that!”

Half of his friends looked shocked, while the other half looked worried. Clearly, this guy didn’t normally get violent, and it was an even bigger shock that he had gotten -- unintentionally -- violent toward a girl.

You just glanced up at the man before your eyes swept the bar. All eyes were on you, except the bartender’s, who was pointing at the burly man who had started the fight before he pointed to the door, telling him to get out.

“Do you want me to do anything, ___-ah?” Chanyeol asked, bending down a bit to look at you. “Let me see your nose.”

“No, I’m fine.” you insisted, though talking hurt. You just looked around the bar, glaring at everybody staring. “Alright, show’s over. Go back to your cheap beer and mind your business.”

You turned away from the crowd, removing your hands from your face. Your palms were covered in blood, and more continued to pour from your nostrils and down your face. You suddenly saw napkins in your vision, but didn’t recognize the hand that was giving them to you. Your eyes followed the arm up until you were met with Wonwoo’s face.

“I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean to.” he told you, sounding genuinely distressed.

“Yeah, you don’t look like you’d mean to, either.” you spat, taking the napkins and wiping your hands with a few of them before putting the rest to to clean up your face, and press to the bottom of your nose. At least it wasn’t broken. “Nice aim, by the way.”

“You came out of nowhere!” he insisted before he let out a deep sigh. “But that’s no excuse. I really am sorry. Can I make it up to you?”

You looked up at him, your gaze turning to a glare as you realized how sore and fucked up your face will be for the next week or two. “Yeah, you can learn to stay out of shit that doesn’t involve you.”

And with that, you took Chanyeol and stormed out of the bar.

-

Wonwoo felt awful the next day at work. It wasn’t because he was hungover or anything, but because he couldn’t stop thinking of how he hurt you. You seemed more pissed than in pain, but he still couldn’t believe he’d punched an innocent girl in the face. How was he supposed to live with himself?

He couldn’t think much about it since the flower shoppe was so busy that day, but he liked that business was picking up. It kept his mind off of how awful of a human he was. Plus, he’d be getting yet another tattoo after work, which he had been planning for a week now. Hopefully, all of that kept his mind off of you and your bloodied nose.

Wonwoo was relieved when one of his regulars, a elderly lady that simply went by Mrs.Kang, had stopped by the shoppe for some daffodils because they were her husband’s favorites. She could easily tell there was something on his mind, and he decided to vent to the sweet lady in hopes she could give him some advice.

“Wonwoo, dear, you are the sweetest person I’ve ever met,” she told him, “and I’ve been alive for...a very long time. You visit the children’s hospital, you volunteer at the animal shelter, and you work at this little flower shoppe. People like you are scarce, Wonwoo.”

Wonwoo chuckled at her hesitation to say her age. “Thank you, Mrs.Kang.”

“I believe that as long as your intentions are not bad, you are not a bad person.” she concluded. “You never mean to hurt anybody; it was just bad luck. Don’t beat yourself up, dear.”

Wonwoo offered a small but warm smile to the woman. “Thank you. I’ll try to remember that.”

Mrs.Kang was someone who always seemed to learn everything about Wonwoo to a point where he considered her a trusted friend. She was one of the only people, other than his friends, that knew about his personal life, and the sleeves of tattoos that he had on his body. She knew that he was passionate about things he loved, and his beliefs, and he would never do anything to intentionally hurt anybody.

You, on the other hand, sulked all day at the tattoo shop. You and Chanyeol sat on the black leather couch in the waiting area while you waited for your next appointments or any walk-ins. Chanyeol made you press an ice pack to your face between clients to keep the swelling and bruising down, though your skin was still black and purple anyway.

While it was clear that it wasn’t Wonwoo’s intention to hit you, you were still angry he did. How could he be so careless? Then again, he didn’t look like he’d fought a day in his life. He looked like he was trying to look tough, but failed miserably.

“If I ever see that asshole again, I’ll-”

“Didn’t you say he didn’t mean it?” Chanyeol chuckled at how you were flip-flopping over if you blamed him or not. “___, you’re probably never going to see him again anyway. It doesn’t matter anymore.”

You sighed, closing your eyes as you laid your head back. “Yeah, you’re right.”

“You just have a temper.” Chanyeol giggled.

You frowned, opening one eye to glare at the redhead. “Do not.”

The door to the shop dinged, so you raised your head and looked at the entrance. Your blood boiled, and your nails dug into the ice pack as you squeezed it in rage. Even though he was now wearing a pink sweater, jeans, and white sneakers instead of his outfit from the night before, you recognized his face.

“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.” you growled.

“Do too.” Chanyeol laughed quietly before he stood up to greet the guy. “Long time, no see.”

“Y-you work here?” Wonwoo stammered as he took in your familiar forms. “Shit, ah... I’m sorry, I can go somewhere else if you-”

“Did you make an appointment?” Chanyeol wondered, already walking over to the front desk to check the computer.

“Yeah, last week.” he nodded as you stood to follow Chanyeol.

“Name?”

“Wonwoo.”

“Ugh!” you groaned, your hands dropping to your sides, and revealing the nasty bruise Wonwoo’s hand left.

Both men looked at you, Chanyeol quirking his eyebrow. “A client assigned to you, I’d take it?”

You nodded, covering your face with your hands, and the ice pack you were still holding. “Yup.”

“I can-”

“No,” you cut off Wonwoo’s offer to either switch or reschedule with someone else or whatever, dropping your hands and stomping off down the hall, “just follow me.”

Wonwoo nodded at Chanyeol and mumbled a ‘thank you’ before he followed after you, not wanting to make you more angry. You led him into your little room and had him sit down on the chair before you sat in your swivel stool and began to prep.

“Alright, what am I doing?” you asked, trying to keep your tone even, but the bite to it didn’t go unnoticed.

Wonwoo pulled a folded up piece of paper and handed it to you. You took it in your hands and unfolded it, turning it this way and that to try to figure out what in the hell it was. It looked like a child did it but didn’t have an actual thing in mind. It was just...scribbles.

“Two things,” you spoke up after examining the drawing, “what the fuck is this, and why did you make this your first tattoo?”

Wonwoo just chuckled, finding something that you didn’t understand to be funny. “This isn’t my first.”

He rolled up both of his sleeves, revealing collages of ink on both arms that disappeared under his pink sweater. No doubt that there were probably more on his body and not just his arms, but you weren’t about to ask him to take his shirt off. But it was clear you were in awe.

You did notice some of the tattoos looked...weird. Not that they were done weird, but that the drawings themselves were weird. Actually, a lot of them looked like children drew them, between stick figure people to scribbles with no clear intention, to blobs of random color outside lines that didn’t make sense.

“What...are these?” you asked slowly as you continued to examine his arms.

“I visit the children’s hospital, and some of them grow pretty attached to me.” he explained with a meek shrug as his cheeks stained a blush pink. “They can’t do a lot, so they usually just draw. Some of them draw pictures, and I get them tattooed to show them later. It makes them happy, and it makes me happy.”

Wonwoo punching you full-force in the face didn’t make you cry, but his explanation almost did. You felt your eyes getting misty as you thought about this sort-of-scary looking man covered in tattoos that were all children’s drawings that they had made for him. You wondered the story behind each of the illustrations, and if any of them were okay and out of the hospital now.

Clearly, you had severely misjudged this guy.

You finally peeled your eyes away from his skin when you had blinked back all the tears. “What’s your name?”

“Wonwoo.” he told you with a soft smile.

“I’m ____. It’ll...” you paused to take a deep breath, trying to keep your emotions under control. God, why did this guy have to be an actual saint? “It’ll be an honor to tattoo you.”

Wonwoo’s face brightened, and his toothy grin was about as bright as the fluorescent lights. “Thank you.”

As you sanitized and put your gloves on, you made small-talk with Wonwoo like you did with your other clients. You found out that he worked at the flower shoppe down the street -- one that you’d always wanted to visit but never had a need to buy yourself flowers -- and also volunteered at the animal shelter. He really was an angel.

“So you’re covered in tats, but you do all this softy shit?” you laughed as you spun back around to face him, prepping his skin to be inked. “You’re something else, Wonwoo.”

“Well, it’s not everyday I see girls covered in tattoos and piercings going into dive bars and putting themselves between two men about to fight each other.” he shot back with a chuckle of his own as he watched you disinfect his skin and put the tracing on. “I guess we’re both pretty odd.”

“Chanyeol -- he’s the tall guy I was with last night,” you explained, gesturing with your head to the waiting area where Wonwoo had last seen your tall friend, “he always says I’m the definition of not reading a book by its cover.”

“Oh? Why is that?”

You sighed softly as you started up the machine and began to dip the needle in ink. “Well, because he says I’m a big softy. Yeah, I’ve gotten into a lot of fights and shit, but... Hmm, what can I use as an example?”

You thought for a bit as you pressed the needle to his skin and began to trace the outlines you had put on him. While you were always one to be more of a rough and tough kind of person, you weren’t always like that. You just kind of had to learn to be like that when you were a girl who lived alone. As far as the tattoos went, though, you just liked them.

“Oh!” you had finally thought of something, and Wonwoo laughed at how excited you seemed. “I don’t like bugs. I can’t kill them, and I can’t capture them to release them. I just can’t go near them at all.”

“You can fight a guy who is six feet tall, but you can’t take care of a spider?” he chuckled, tossing his head back in laughter. “That’s adorable.”

You couldn’t contain the heat creeping up into your cheeks. “Adorable, huh? Nobody’s ever called me that.”

Time with Wonwoo went by faster than you expected, and you actually enjoyed his company. He actually made you giggle. He also didn’t let it go, and neither did Chanyeol who had heard down the hall from your open door.

As you stood behind the desk with Chanyeol, who was examining Wonwoo’s other tattoos, Wonwoo slid the money he owed you -- plus a very generous tip since he still felt bad about your face -- across the counter. “So, if I ever need another tattoo...?”

“I’d be more than happy to do it for you.” you smiled with a nod. “Thanks, Wonwoo.”

“No, thank you.” he grinned. He turned to leave, but then seemed to remember something. “Oh, ___; what’s your favorite flower?”

The question seemed a bit odd and out of place, but you answered anyway. “Sunflowers.”

He nodded slowly before saying goodbye to you and Chanyeol and leaving the shoppe.

“You like him.” Chanyeol teased once the door had closed.

You frowned with a huff, pressing the ice pack back to your face -- which, Wonwoo kept apologizing for. “Do not.”

-

The next day when you arrived to open the shop, you found a bouquet of flowers on the welcome mat in front of the door. You bent down to pick up the bundle of flowers that were held together with a pink ribbon before unlocking the door and entering the shop.

When you had turned on the lights and made your way to the counter to turn on the computer, you read the small card it came with.

‘___,

I can’t say sorry enough. I hope these help you.

-Wonwoo’

You couldn’t stop the smile that crept it’s way onto your face. Before anybody else showed up, you hurried down the hall to your station to put them in some water and hide them away from Chanyeol’s teasing.

However, the teasing was inevitable when more flowers showed up twice a week. Later that week, Chanyeol walked into your room where you were with a client, a bouquet of sunflowers in his arm.

“Special delivery for Miss ___ from her boyfriend.” he teased with a childlike grin, resting the flowers on a nearby counter.

“He’s not my boyfriend!” you pouted as Chanyeol left before you could stab him with a needle or something.

Before you had started to wash up and tattoo the small, nervous girl in your room, you checked the card on the flowers.

‘___,

I wanted you to know the boy loved the tattoo! Thank you again for doing such a wonderful job.

-Wonwoo’

Your heart fluttered at the fact Wonwoo was continuously sending you flowers, and that feeling only worsened as the weeks went on, and he continued sending more and more. Some were just sunflowers, and some featured other flowers and greenery that accented the large yellow flowers perfectly. Wonwoo was truly great at what he did.

And you finally got those flowers for yourself you always wanted.

But you started to feel...kind of bad. You face eventually healed, and you hadn’t seen or properly spoken to Wonwoo in a while. The conversation and were one-sided, just like the gifts. But what could you send that would be meaningful? You didn’t know what he liked.

Then again, you were an artist. You could think of something, right? 

It took a few days to a week, but you eventually thought of the only thing you deemed decent enough to send back. When Wonwoo went to open the flower shoppe one morning, he saw a box in front of the glass door. He picked it up, seeing there were no addresses or stamps on it, meaning it was hand delivered. That made him curious.

He brought the box inside and put it on the counter top where he worked. He used a pair of scissors to open the box, and gasped softly when he saw the framed pencil drawing inside. It was a picture of him, eyes closed with a content smile. Surrounding him were a few sunflowers, and a halo floating above his head with angel wings coming from his back. He noticed that there were even a few of his tattoos drawn on his arms, and he was shocked that that detail was correct.

Under the picture was a note that he immediately picked up after carefully setting the portrait on the counter.

‘Wonwoo,

You’ve made it up to me enough, so it’s about time I do the same. You really are an angel.

-___

PS I hope I got the tattoos right!’

Wonwoo covered his face with both hands, trying to hide the shy smile on his face even though he was alone in the store. How did you remember what he looked like so clearly? And the tattoos were a whole other thing! He wasn’t only impressed and flattered but...something else. It was a good feeling though.

A very good feeling.

[howlingday]

jaune's from a family of raiders

well not quite he's from a culture that puts a lot of stock in capturing and ransoming off their friends and neighbors from other tribes. think of it like a combat sport only some times you're also stealing cattle and horses.

he's a prince of the high king

well again it's more complicated the kingdoms are like city states they don't exactly legislate or collect taxes all the way out into the wilds. but they do send huntsmen to protect the area and then tax the huntsmen.

jaune's dad just happened to be a huntsman who didn't pay taxes because the area his family had lived in for generations also happened to be outside the control of vale. and lots of people wanna live near the huntsmen who can keep them safe. so he has a position of respect among all the tribes. and jaune is his son

he's also required to have a harem

this one is interesting because it's one of those cultural things that seems weird from the outside but makes more sense when you look at it. men are hard to keep alive without a hospital. even with aura. women are part of a protected group like children and so take less risks in life. leading to there being a ton more women than men. and since technology isn't quite to the level of the kingdoms proper,

well more hands to help maintain a house isn't bad right?

but most of all jaune is a man who only wants to do right by his family, whether that be those from the past, or the woman, or women, that he loves.

and this part needs no further clarification

tldr: au where jaune's part of a tribal community and brings his lover or lovers home to meet the family. how does that go for everyone?

P.S: also sorry for the flowery ask, i felt inspired by something

Ooh, do tell the inspiration!

"Unhand me, you brute!" Jaune sighed as the girl in white screeched and squirmed behind him. "Do you know who I am?! When my family hears of this, they will hang you for this! Do you hear me?"

Jaune kept his focus on the road ahead as he gripped the reigns of Valorie, his mare, glancing left and right occasionally to avoid an ambush. His family might have a hold on the territory, but with his father growing in age, so, too, did that grip loosen. A rival tribe or rogue patrol from the kingdoms would easily snatch up an easy target like the lone swordsman and his latest bride.

"Could you at least tell me where we're going?"

"Home." Jaune answered, not looking back.

"Oh, yes, of course! How could I not know? And where exactly is your home?"

"Just up ahead."

"Uh huh, I see, and what are you going to do once you're home?"

Jaune let out a long sigh as he stretched his shoulders a bit. "Well, drop you off with the others, then have you judged, if there's enough time."

"Judged?" Weiss raised an eyebrow. "Judged for what?"

"Wife material." Weiss blushed and her jaw dropped. "Can you cook; can you clean; are you good with children; can you have children; do you have any family illnesses?" He shrugged. "Routine wedding discussions."

"W-Wedding?!" Ah, and just like that, the shrieking began anew. "You savage! You brute! I refuse to be treated like some stock taken to auction, about to be sold to some pervert noble!"

"You're not being sold to a noble." Jaune smiled and looked back. "Just me." Before she could begin again, Jaune let out a sigh of relief. "Finally, we're home."

It may have only been about a week since Jaune had left, but it felt like forever since his departure from the lands of Arcadia. The valleys and hills were as green and lush as ever, and the summer winds carried the calming scent of flowers across it all. He passed the growing crops, where he saw his sisters, their wives, and some of his own watering and tending to them. They waved to him, and he returned one to them.

"Welcome home, Miss Weiss." The girl marveled at the beauty. She had only heard of such places from her studies in the manor, but to see it in person was something else. Before she could admire it more, however, the mare stopped, jostling her from her focus.

Jaune slid down, then pulled Weiss down as well, carrying her bridal style. He then set her onto her own feet and untied the binds on her wrists and ankles. She lifted her leg, then kicked his shin. He yelped in pain.

"That was for the kidnapping!" She shouted.

"Yeesh! Just a kick?" Weiss turned to see a lilac-eyed blonde woman in fieldwork garments smiling at her. "When he dropped me off, they had to get his old man to get me off of him." She looked past Weiss to Jaune. "You going soft on me, or just your taste in women?"

"And who are you?" Weiss spat. "One of his whores?"

Yang laughed and placed a sweaty, mud-encrusted paw on her delicate shoulder. It felt warm at first, then hot as her grip became tight, and her eyes red. "I dare you to say that again."

"Yang, stop it!" Weiss and Yang looked to the younger girl running from inside the house. She was a brunette with red tips and silver eyes, and she wore a red apron that she had to roll up to her shins. She futilely tugged on the blonde woman's arm. "Jaune told you not to hurt anyone else!"

She let go, making the girl yelp as she was lifted with her arm. "Aw, c'mon, Rubes, we were just playing!" She then looked to Weiss, her eyes lilac once more. "Ain't that right, Ice Queen?"

"Ice Queen?!" Weiss balked.

"Yang, cut it out, please." Jaune sighed.

"Fine, fine!" Yang turned around, lowering her arm. The smaller girl let go as she walked away. "Besides, the crops won't grow themselves. I'll go be a good workhorse." She stopped to look back and winked. "I expect my carrot tonight, though, sweetheart~."

"Play nice and we'll see." Jaune responded with a smile. With that, Yang chuckled and resumed walking, swaying her hips for a few more yards before jogging back to the field. He looked to the younger girl and smiled. "And how have you been, Ruby?"

She sighed. "Do you mean after you left, or after you came back?"

"Both."

"After you left, I missed you. It was your mom's birthday, but I couldn't afford a present, so I took on her chores for the week, but I didn't expect her chores included chimney cleaning, so now I have soot so far up my nose, I'm still sneezing black. Then I had to tend to the chickens, but they're so vicious, and I swear they can smell weakness, because the rooster jumped me at least six times. Then Zwei needed a bath, but he somehow tricked me into the tub, so I smell like wet dog a little bit. And then I had to bake her cake all on my own, but there were eggshells in it and it came out both burnt and raw somehow, and I just- Argh!" Ruby collapsed into Jaune's torso. "I really missed you."

Jaune held her and kissed the crown of her head. "I missed you, too, Ruby." He stepped back and held a hand outward towards Weiss. "Ruby Rose-Arc, this is Weiss Schnee. She's going to be my newest bride." He looked to Weiss. "Weiss Schnee, this is Ruby Rose-Arc, my second wife. She and Yang will help prepare you for judging."

"It's so nice to meet you!" Ruby swooped in, snatching the other woman's hands in hers. Her smile was wide and bright. "It'll be nice to have another short girl in our home!"

"No!" Weiss yanked her hands away. "I refuse! When my father hears of this, he'll-"

"Oh, that reminds me!" Jaune walked to Valorie and reached into her saddlebag. Weiss grumbled as she watched him pull out a small, burlap sack. "Here, Ruby. This was part of the dowry, but I want you to have it."

Ruby opened the sack and squealed in delight. "Dust crystals!" She hugged the new woman tightly. "You are the bestest bestie a bestie could ever have!"

"What the-?! Where did you get those?!" Weiss shrieked.

"From your father." Ruby ran inside with her new sack. "In exchange for marrying you, we'll allow him to trade through our lands."

"My father would never-!" Jaune gave her a curious look. "I mean, not to one of his own-!" Her voice grew softer. "I thought..."

"Listen," Jaune placed a hand on her shoulder, "if you don't want to marry me, I understand. Most of the others didn't want to, either. But if you give it a few days, you might learn to love it here. You won't go hungry, you'll be well protected, and I promise you'll be loved every day."

"I just... I didn't think I would be treated like this. By my own family."

"I know." Jaune removed his hand. "Would it be okay if I hugged you?"

"I-"

"JAUNEY!" The two saw a young woman bull rush towards Jaune, carrying a dead boar high above her head. Jaune extended his arms out and caught her, spinning in place at least a dozen times. Blood sprayed around, including onto Weiss and the other two as they embraced. When they stopped, Jaune set her down, giving her a butterfly kiss with his nose to hers. "You're home!"

Jaune chuckled. "Yup!" He peered around her and looked to Weiss. "And I brought back someone new."

Nora turned around and gasped as she looked at Weiss. "Oh! My! Dust! You are so small!" She looked to Jaune and waggled her brow. "Be careful you don't break her!" She then laughed. "I'd shake your hand, but, uh, I'm a little busy. I'm Nora Valkyrie-Arc, Jaune's fourth wife."

"Weiss Schnee." Blood dripped from her hair. "And I was just about to leave."

"Aw! Already?! We were gonna make pancakes tomorrow!"

"I was going to make pancakes, Nora." Weiss turned to the male voice and saw a slim man in the doorway, wearing both an apron and a blank expression. "Just like I do every morning for you."

"Renny!" Nora cheered before tossing the trophy to him. "This is my first husband, Lie-Valkyrie Ren!"

Despite his slim figure, the man held the heavy beast with seemingly no trouble. "A pleasure to meet you." He nodded, before turning to head inside.

"Is he also your husband?" Weiss asked. Jaune chuckled nervously. This was going to be a long day, but they both already knew that.

[yuri-shibuya]

so im writing something for arctic au tubbo but in the meantime!!!!

Here are some fun facts about this au!! 🎉🎉

- Tommy was born on the longest night of the year!

- Wilbur on the other hand was born on the longest day of the year!

- Techno can't style his hair kek (any fancy styling mentioned at any point was done by tommy or wilbur)

- Sally was originally not gonna be a part of this au but she headbutted me as soon as I thought of babie Fundy so here she is haha

- Mumza did the same hahah

- Techno is more proficient with longswords, Wilbur with bows and arrows, and Schlatt (when needed) with axes!

- Bad adopted Sapnap!

- Karl loves stories and regularly watches performances in their local playhouse!

- Niki is wayyyy more badass than u think she is (she is so cool i love her so much)

- Niki, Techno, Eret and Fundy regularly have book club meetings! fundy loves fantasy, eret and techno regularly discuss history and myths, and niki reads murder mysteries!

- Dream's tree is hidden within the depths of the Holy Lands and is inaccessible by most people (but george n sapnap think it's a regular ole tree kek)

- Ranboo owns one of those norwegian forest cats named Endie!

- Hannah and False are cousins!

- Hannah and Punz have a lil rivalry ongoing about their bedwars streak (hannah is winning by one point)

- Niki is the daughter of an apothecary and worked under a baker before she entered the castle as an apprentice baker!

- Dream has a very skewed mindset on what a normal person can take (he once thought sapnap could jump down a tree, sapnap was 5 poor child)

- Skeppy and Bad regularly send each other letters! (they both sometimes add gifts or herbs to the letters)

- Phil makes little frost flower crowns for the boys when he sees them (Tommy's melts after a bit and Wilbur gives tommy his!)

- Wilbur has a guitar! It's a special one made in a temperate shop where they made it to withstand the arctic cold :D

- Every area has their own common medium for spells! (Arctic embroidery, Temperate carvings, and Tropic written)

- Every area knows how to do spoken or sung spellcasting but the Holy Lands have transformed it into an art form!

- Red and Ant met when they were very young in the Tropics before they were brought to the Holy Lands.

- Phil gave Mumza a set of deep purple embroidered gloves when she agreed to marry him (she immediately wore it and squished his face)

- Tubbo can and will do things out of spite if mentioned he cant (he lives to prove people wrong)

- Tubbo and Techno regularly spar! The rest bring snacks and hang out if they can but it's a rare thing to witness

- Xisuma, Sam and Bad regularly have tea together!

- Quackity and Jack are partners in crime! (they're amazing conmen and pickpockets)

- Iskall took one look at Mumbo and went "we're friends now" (mumbo is still confused)

- Tommy is a very bad navigator (tubbo is a good one by necessity)

- Fran is Sam's first ever golem that he'd worked on and she's still his favorite

- In honor of my cat shedding on everything i own, Ranboo regularly finds Endie's fur on all his things (theres fur on my laptop and she doesn't even go near my laptop pls)

- George sleeps quite a bit but once he slept so long that Dream thought he died and cried (he woke up when sapnap and dream were getting to the eulogy of their own makeshift funeral) in fairness sapnap was about 10 and Dream doesn't know how people work.

thats about it!! there were a bit more but they're more involved in the storyline and i didnt think yall would want to hear me ramble about more worldbuilding stuff hahaha

[seattlesea]

Lorien Legacies Characters as Things My Family and I Have Said (Part Three)

John: Am I cute

Six: Whatever makes you happy

--

Marina: Where’s my perfume?

Eight: I drank it

--

Nine: *squeezes bread* I just really felt like doing that

Five: I feel like doing that to you

--

Eight: Use your bread you fucking heathen

--

Five, tucking Maggie and Ella into bed: Night night c*nts

Maggie and Ella, in unison: REEEE

--

John: *attempts to do something but fails*

Nine: Bitch thought

John: Shut up

Six: Bitch thought

Five: Bitch thought

One: Bitch thought

Eight: Bitch thought

Adam: Bitch thought

John: I hate you guys so fucking much

--

Eight: Is eating this much cheese even healthy???

--

John: Raise your hand if you love dogs

Adam: I would but I’m eating goldfish

--

Five, on an Omegle video chat with a knocked-out Sam and Ella: They're dead

Nine, on the other end of the call: Tell them to get up

--

Six: Men are dumb. Fuck men. You know, what? To all the ladies in the chat, here's some advice.

Six: Become a lesbian

Six: Adopt a cat

Six: Plant a garden

Six: Live in a forest

Six: Destroy the patriarchy

Six: Travel the world

Six: Fuck shit up

Six: And do it with a smile and a piña colada *bites chip*

--

Marina: I was gonna wear a cute pink flower crown with my outfit but then I thought fuck that, I'm going low-key cottagecore, not Ohioan frolicker or Idahoan horse girl

--

Adam: Dude, are you high?

Sam: What? No

Sam, suddenly remembering he rode passenger while Nile smoked weed on their way home and has gotten high off second-hand smoking weed before: OH SHI-

--

Five: Why am I even up at four in the morning with chips and Mountain Dew???

Marina: I mean, it could be from insomnia rooting from your depressio-

Five: Depression? BITCH PLEASE that shit is so 2019

--

Adam's teacher: I know it's Monday, but if it's any comfort, today is the first day of the last week of April!

Adam: What the FUCK did you just say to me-

--

Eight, mimicking an old man: gEt OfF mY lAwN

Sam: *puts face in bowl and laughs*

--

Nine, knocking on the door: Let me innnnn

John, sitting against the door so Nine doesn't come in: No, I'm still mad at you

Nine: Ok ok I'm sorry, I'll pay you fifty dollars

--

Five, trying to be compassionate with Nine: Remember when we used to match hairstyles, you fuck?

--

Literally anyone: *laughs*

Eight: Giggles

--

Hannu: No sad, just ball

--

Six: fight me fight me fight me fight me fight me fight me square up square up square up sqUARE UP SQUARE U-

--

One: Can I use your headphones?

Adam: Sorry, I'm using the-

One: Shut up you dumb fuck

--

Eight, talking to himself in the mirror: Oh my god look at you in your big, baggy flannel you look sO CUTE you're adorable don't let anyone tell you differently, including you you dumb fucking insecure little bitch

--

Daniela: What would happen if a woman took penis enlargement pills?

Adam: Hey no offense but what the fuck is wrong with you?

--

John: What even goes on in your mind?

Nine: Tarot cards, money, Cotton Eye Joe on loop, applesauce, lighting a house on fire, jumping out a second-story house to see if my ankle is durable or not...

John:...

Nine: But mostly Cotton Eye Joe on loop

--

Five: Some people identify as she/her. Some people identify as he/him. Some people identify as they/them. I identifty as a fucking disappointment.

--

Marina: Hey, can I ask you a question?

Eight, naked in a bubble-filled bathtub with lit candles, a wine glass full of apple juice, and IceJJFish playing: Do I look like someone with the fucking time?

--

John: Hey, are you gay?

Adam, sitting on the ground blasting Ariana Grande with an iced almond milk latte and wearing a baggy flannel shirt: BITCH-

--

Six: *opens her online-shopping package*

Marina: Uh, those are going to make you look a little emo, aren't they?

Six, putting on her thick chain choker and leather gloves: that's the poINT-

--

Sam: *dances like a crab to the Crab Rave* Crabby Rave make pain go away

--

One: 'oH i DoNt HaVe PrOnOuNs'- what the fuck are you then, a toaster?

--

Random celebrity: Wow, fangirls are so sweet and dedicated, they really should get paid for all the promotions and hard work they do!

Six: Ok pay me then

--

Maggie, crying: All I wanted was some fucking chicky nuggies

--

Sam, walking up to Nine in public: Hey bestie-

Nine: I don't know you

Sam: Bitch-

--

Ella: I'm gonna send a celebrity a meme everyday until they reply to me

Marina: Why?

Ella: Why the fuck not?

--

Five: Yeah, I'm depressed *laughs*

John: Why'd you laugh?

Five: It's a coping mechanism

--

Maggie: I don't want a boyfriend or a girlfriend or a partner I wants the three D's

Sarah, horrified: The WHAT

Maggie: Dogs, donuts, and diamonds

--

Hannu: So there's this philosophy theory-

One: I will fucking drown you

--

Six: If you are male and you have a flat ass, don't speak to me. I need guy friends who match my level of THICKNESS

--

One: Oh my god she's so cute

Adam: She has a girlfriend

One: Sharing is caring

--

Five: If ONE MORE BITCHASS WHORE comments on my clothes and shits about how feminine I dress I swear I will be gOING TO JAIL

Five: JUST SAY YOU ARE JEALOUS YOU CAN'T WORK BOTH AND LEAVE BITCH

--

Nine: So I have this problem where I hate myself but I still think I'm better than everyone else

John:...

Nine: Like I'm trash but I'm QUALITY trash, I'm trash from the garbage bags of Louis Vuitton, I'm recyclable, reusable trash, I'm the trash no one wants to throw away

John: Um...

Nine: If Gucci made a limited-edition, 24-karat gold garbage bag, I'd be that garbage bag

--

Maggie, holding a nerf gun to Adam's head: Gimme all your fucking money

--

Sam: I don't know, I've just been feeling a little down lately

Six: No

Sam: What?

Six: That's not allowed

Sam: Wha-

Six: *smacks Sam in the face with a pillow*

--

Maggie: BESTIE. YOU ARE A BAD BITCH. DON'T LET ANYONE TELL YOU DIFFERENTLY. WORK IT QUEEN

The pigeon on the sidewalk:

[halloweenhoneylover]

serendipity

summary: spencer cannot wait to propose, but you accidentally beat him to it (spencer reid x fem!reader)

word count: 5k

warnings: some language! some minor angst!

author’s note: this is 100% based on one of my favorite episodes of new girl (google doc name is winston bishop type shit), also this is mega self-indulgent so if u don’t like dinosaurs and/or ferns i’m sorry :/

You let out a satisfied hum. Everything was quite nearly perfect. Presently, you were sitting on a bench next to the little duck pond in the park by your apartment, and you watched as tendrils of the weeping willow grazed the surface, sending gentle ripples across the water. It seemed to glow in the dappled sunlight. An adorable duck family was nestled into some of the reeds, and your heart was happy as you watched the mother tending to her ducklings. This was your favorite spot in the entire city.

“Hey, Spence?” Your head rested on his shoulder as he read one of the Ray Bradbury novels that he loved dearly. You weren’t sure which one he was on now; he’d been determined to read his entire collection this weekend and had been flying through.

“Yes, dear?” His eyes didn’t leave the pages, but you didn’t mind.

“What do you call a group of ducks?”

“There’s a couple names actually. It can be called a raft, team, or paddling; it’s a matter of preference.” Finally, he shifted his gaze toward you, and he couldn’t help the smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. The flush of your cheeks and the wisps of your hair, he was so incredibly enamored, he loved you so much. And he was so excited to let you know so soon, but not quite yet.

“I think I like paddling.”

“Yeah, me too.” Shutting his eyes to revel in this moment, he pressed a kiss to the crown of your head. 

“Hey, Spence?”

“Yes, dear?”

“Do you wanna get married?”

What.

Spencer floundered in the absolute contradiction of feelings that he found himself submerged in in that moment. Ice flooded his veins, and his face heated. His blood pressure skyrocketed, and oh God, it’s not supposed to happen like this. Yes, he loves her terribly, and yes, he absolutely wants to marry her, but he had a plan! An incredibly intricate and thoughtful twenty-two step plan that was going to take place over the course of the next month. It was all laid out in an entire binder in his desk. All he could muster in response was an extremely eloquent, “Uh—well, uh—”

Oblivious to his inner turmoil, you finally lifted your head to look at him with the biggest heart eyes he’s ever seen, and he can’t help but feel so, so guilty. “I just thought, why not, you know? Spencer, I love you a whole lot, and I’m pretty sure you love me a whole lot too. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, and I want the rest of my life to start right now.” 

“No.”

Judging by the look on your face, that was clearly not the answer you were expecting. “No?”

“Uh, yeah, no.” God, stupid dumb idiot, telling the girl you want to marry that you don’t want to marry her. What’s the point of having 187 IQ points if you use exactly none of them when it actually matters?

“No, you don’t want to marry me?” Your heart dropped into your stomach and was falling further and further every passing second.

“Wait no, hold on—” 

“No, I get it,” you choked out, hastily standing up from the bench. “Actually, I don’t get it, but that doesn’t really matter, I guess.” You jammed your arms into the sleeves of your jacket, so you could get out of this moment as soon as humanly possible. Holy shit, had you been blind-sided. “Um, I think I’m gonna go hang out with Penelope, might spend the night, I’m not sure. Enjoy your book.” And with that, you were speeding down the path out of the park.

“Wait, (Y/N/N)!” Spencer tried to gather his belongings to run after you, but you had a head start, and he couldn’t gather all of the books in his arms fast enough. Leave the books!!! Go after her!!! But you had already turned the corner and were out of sight.

With his books finally secure, Spencer sprinted in the direction of your shared apartment. He needed to fix this. And fast.

———

Morgan sat at his desk peacefully looking over the plans for a house he was renovating when the phone rang, and he couldn't help but internally groan at the sound. If Hotch is calling on his weekend off, so help him God, he would hang up and chuck the phone out the window.

Instead, he was met with Garcia’s voice, which was so loud he had to pull the phone away from his ear. “Whoa, whoa, whoa, mama. Let’s take it down a few notches.”

“Alright, fine, babycakes,” she hissed, and Derek was shocked at the unfamiliar venom in her tone. “Would you please be so kind as to explain to me why your dear friend Reid is the most evil, most reprehensible, most despicable—”

“Garcia, what are you talking about?”

“You mean that little rat boy hasn’t come crawling to you explaining his crimes?”

Despite his infinite patience for her antics, he sighed quietly. “I’m in the dark, baby girl, but I’m sure whatever Reid did, it can’t be that bad.”

“Oh, it can be that bad! He told (Y/N) that he didn’t want to marry her.”

“He did what?” Derek’s eyes were practically popping out of his head at the news. There’s no way that happened.

“He said that he didn’t want to marry our precious lily flower (Y/N)! I love that boy, but now, (Y/N) is here bawling her eyes out on my couch, and I don’t know what to do!”

His heart broke a little at the thought of his friend being so devastated, but he couldn’t help the roaring confusion that plagued him. Derek knew that Spencer was planning to propose to you; he’d seen the binder. He’d even been recruited to help with Steps 4, 9, 10, and 18! 

Oh.

And that’s when Derek had a sneaking suspicion as to what had occurred. “Penelope, were his exact words ‘I don’t want to marry—” But his attention was drawn away from the phone by a knock on the door.

Speak of the devil….

“Garcia, I gotta go, but tell (Y/N) everything’s gonna be okay. I’m gonna have a word with our boy.”

“Oh my God, is he there with you?! That little bastard—” He hung up before her words could become any sharper, and the knocking became frantic.

“Okay, okay, I’m coming!” He jogged to go unlock the door. “You’re gonna knock the door down, kid.”

The door swung open to reveal Spencer, huffing and puffing with a red face and a binder in arm. “Morgan, I am the stupidest man to ever walk the Earth.”

“Did you run here?”

Ignoring the question, he pushed past him with an agitated step. “I am a complete idiot, a dumbass, if you will.”

Morgan shut the door and crossed his arms, walking to stand opposite Reid who had sat on the couch with his head in his hands. “Yeah, I might agree with you on that one. Garcia called me, told me (Y/N) is crying on her couch ‘cause you told her you didn’t want to marry her, which I know is not true.”

“I didn’t say that!” he cried, gesticulating wildly. “Not exactly. She asked me if I wanted to get married—”

“And what did you say?”

His hesitation was palpable. “...No.”

“Yeah, I’d say that constitutes dumbass behavior, especially because I know you only said that because you have your proposal all planned out, and you want it to be perfect.”

“Morgan, you don’t get it,” he implored, the desperation evident in his eyes, and Derek finally started feeling a little bad for the kid, an inkling of sympathy squirming in his gut. “No one deserves the most perfect proposal more than (Y/N). No one. You know how she’s always felt unwanted, and she’s told me that she felt like she always has to ask for love, and I couldn’t let her feel like that with me. I had to make sure that she had a special proposal because she’s special. And I want her to know without having to ask that I want her more than anything else in this world.”

Reid looked down at the toes of his scuffed Converse, hoping that he hadn’t permanently fucked up his best chance at happiness, and Morgan’s expression softened. “I know, kid. And I’m not trying to rub salt in the wound, but you do know that this was not the best way of letting her know that she’s wanted and loved?”

“Yes, I know, Morgan,” he muttered, voice breaking around the slug in his throat. “I wasn’t thinking.”

A sigh. “No, you weren’t. But I’m gonna help you fix it.”

Reid looked up with wide eyes. “Really?”

“You both deserve to be happy...even if you make some pretty stupid choices sometimes.” 

Reid didn’t think he’d ever felt so grateful for his friend, and he offered a smile in gratitude. “Thanks. But I don’t even know where to start.”

Quirking an eyebrow and returning with a grin, Morgan picked up the binder from the table where it had been set. “I’ve got a couple ideas.”

——— 

“How is she doing?”

“Erm, it’s not looking great,” Garcia responded.

She was openly hostile when Reid had called her (he’d never been on the receiving end of Garcia’s wrath (so few people had been), and he was sure that was something he never wanted to experience again), but she’d finally restrained herself and offered a little empathy (not a lot though, she was too loyal to (Y/N) for that) when he had explained himself. However, when she’d been informed of the plan to apologize, regain your love and trust and to maybe, just maybe, ask for your hand in marriage, she had wholeheartedly avowed her support and pledged her help despite still being a little miffed at boy genius’ idiocy.

“She’s been sitting on the floor of the bathroom for an hour listening to Landslide on repeat and crying, so I would say she’s, um…not well.”

Spencer winced at that, and he felt physically sick at the thought that you were hurting because of him. His heart clenched unbearably, and he wished so badly that he could take back his words and just say yes, but unfortunately for him, time is linear, and he was just going to have to do his best to fix things.

“I just need a couple more hours to get everything ready.”

“Well, hurry up, pretty boy! I love our girl immensely, but if I have to hear Stevie Nicks mourn the passage of time and love one more time, I will lose my mind.”

“Garcia, please, just be patient.”

She groaned. “You’re lucky I love you.” And with that, she hung up.

——— 

You huffed a sigh, clutching to your chest a shiny pink pillow covered in sequins and giving Garcia the biggest puppy eyes you could muster. “Please, Penny, let’s not go out to dinner. Let’s just stay in and order Cheesecake Factory; you love Cheesecake Factory!”

“You’re right I do, but I love you more, and right now, you need to get up and get some fresh air!” The almost excessive amount of peppiness in her voice and her refusal of Cheesecake Factory was slightly suspicious, but you didn’t really have time to consider it as she dragged you up off the couch and to the door.

“Okay, counterpoint: what if you went out for dinner, and I stayed in and wallowed in self-pity?”

By the look on her face, you knew your evading tactics were not going to fly. She tutted slightly and said, “You’ve got to know I can’t let you do that. I’m legally obligated to stay with you until you feel better, that’s the deal when you’re friends with me.” She grabbed your coat, holding it open for you. 

Reluctantly, you sighed and slid your arms in, grumbling, “You’re too nice for your own good.”

“Well, that’s very sweet of you, but let’s get a move on!” And with that, she herded you out the door.

——— 

It was a nice dinner, the two of you out on the town, and for a while, you were granted the solace of distraction. Garcia took you into the city, and somehow it felt a little easier to breathe there under the streetlights amidst a bustling Saturday night crowd. You nestled together in some street corner diner, ordering an absurd amount of food and jabbering on about anything and everything. If she noticed the moments when you fell silent, eyes distant and glassy, (and she definitely did), she never said anything; she just offered a new topic and redirected you from the very sad place that was thoughts of Spencer. And you would latch on eagerly, seizing the opportunity to forget.

So, you spent the evening with late night waffles and french fries and milkshakes and the unending source of cheer that was Penelope Garcia, and by the end of it, your mind didn’t immediately redirect to that morning’s tragedy, which Garcia would define as a success. Together, you found your way back to her car, and you tumbled into the passenger seat, your eyelids immediately fluttering shut. Penelope grinned and drove off.

When you woke again, you were engulfed in bewilderment and not just the regular post-nap disorientation. “Penny, why are we at the National Mall? This is the opposite direction of your house.”

She tapped her acrylics on the steering wheel and nervously surveyed the street in front of her, trying to escape your prying gaze. “Uh—no reason!”

Too exhausted from your day of grief and distraction to be suspicious of her terrible lying, you leaned your head back against the seat, watching the glow of the streetlamps as they roved over the interior of the car.

Garcia seized this movement to set the next part of Reid’s plan in motion. “Hey! You know, what’d be fun is if we went to the Natural History museum! There’s nothing better to cheer you up than dusty old dinosaur bones.” (She didn’t necessarily understand the appeal, but she was trying her best.)

A small chuckle escaped you. “As much as I’d love that, it closed at nine, so we wouldn’t even be able to get in anyway.”

Garcia’s mind thundered furiously as she tried to come up with some way to get you in that freaking building. “Let’s just walk past! Take a peek through the windows, see what we can see!”

Something in you sensed that she wasn’t going to let this go, so you relented as she finagled some sort of street parking that was definitely illegal. You could barely get your seatbelt off before she was dragging you the stone steps, the massive corinthian columns looming. You squeaked a quick Penelope! and tried to keep up. Entirely ready to give up and head back to the car when she tried the door, your mouth fell open in shock when it gave way with ease. 

“Oh, look! It’s open! Let’s go inside.”

She didn’t wait for you to respond before she was ducking in the building, and you followed, completely and utterly baffled. Stumbling into the atrium, you were met by a receptionist at the desk. She smiled warmly, “Miss (Y/L/N), I presume?”

You nodded slowly before turning to Garcia whose devious smirk was undeniable. “Penny, what is going on?”

She grabbed your hands and looked at you with tears in her eyes. (Where the hell did those come from?) “Just remember that you’re a very forgiving person, and that sometimes the smartest of us can also be the most stupid.”

Furrowing your brows at that slightly cryptic message, you went to respond when the receptionist stood and said, “If you would, miss, please follow me.”

And so you walked with this stranger through the empty halls, the click of her heels echoing. It was odd to see a space that was normally flushed with people completely empty, and you studied the walls as you walked. “Um, may I ask what’s going on?”

The receptionist grinned, “I’m sorry, but I’m under strict instructions from Dr. Reid to not reveal anything.”

Strict instructions from Dr. Reid. You gasped a little at that, and your thoughts raged with possibilities of what Spencer could possibly have planned. If this was an elaborate attempt at an apology, you were a little overwhelmed; the little dispute this morning absolutely did not necessitate a response of this degree. Sure, you were disappointed, and you needed time to deal with it away from him, but you weren’t mad at him, not really. You had talked about marriage and knew that it was something you both wanted, but you had never discussed when. If he wasn’t ready to marry you quite yet, that was fine; you’d adjust. You were pretty sure you’d wait a whole lifetime for him. Besides, you had sprung it on him quite abruptly, and you knew Spencer and that he was not always well-equipped to deal with monumental change, and how could you blame him for that? You’d wait as long as he needed. 

“Here we are!”

Her words broke you from your thoughts, and you looked up to realize you were at the Hall of Fossils. (You had always been fond of the dinosaurs.) Glancing at the girl, you asked, “What do I do now?”

She laughed a little at that. “Just go inside. Take a look around.” And with that, she turned around, leaving you to wander the exhibit. 

So you ambled easily through the prehistoric relics and fossilized memories of a past Earth. It was rather haunting, the eerie silence and the illuminated dinosaur skeletons. You peered down at one of the explanatory plaques and instead found a blue post-it note. COLD. A grin wormed its way onto your face, and you jogged a little to the next plaque. GREENHOUSE GASES—WARMER. Spencer was always one for a game. So you zig-zagged through, collecting post-its. GLACIAL PERIOD—COLDER. CRETACEOUS WARMING. EOCENE KIND OF HOT! 

With the last note, you looked up and gasped yet again. Spencer was standing in a sea of different plants and flowers placed throughout the central clearing, and donning his signature tight-lipped smile and your favorite of his cardigans, he gave you a small wave. “Hi.”

“Hello.” Your response was breathless, and now that you had met his eyes, you couldn’t tear yours away. A weight lifted from your lungs, it was such a relief to see him, and you hadn’t realized how much you had missed him in the hours you spent apart until you could breathe properly again. “Fancy seeing you here.”

He chuckled at that, but the tension in his shoulders never released; he was clearly anxious, but for what reason, it was hard to say. 

An amusing gleam in his eye, he replied, “Same to you.” 

“How did you get into the museum after hours?”

He took the moment to examine the toes of his shoes, replying delicately, “I have friends in high places.”

“Ah, Dr. Reid, I always forget that you ruled the world of academia before your time fighting crime.”

He paused for a moment before continuing. “Do you remember our first date?”

You gave him a tender smile, and his racing heartbeat eased ever so slightly, you just had that kind of effect on him. “Well,” you began, “I remember you were wearing that cardigan, the one that I love, and I was so nervous I thought I was going to pass out—”

“I was definitely more nervous. I was so anxious I forgot who Carl Sagan was at one point.”

“I’d forgotten about that!” You giggled at the memory. “But I remember being in this room, and we were making stupid dinosaur puns, and I believe I told you that you are dino-mite….”

He nodded meekly with a subdued grin. “I think that was the moment I fell in love with you.” Meeting his eyes once again, you felt the wind knocked out of you. The utter honesty you found radiating from his soft golden irises hurt your heart, and it was impossible to not believe him. He fell in love on the first date, how sweet and lovely and perfectly Spencer is that?

You took a breath and began to walk closer, skimming a hand over the lush greenery around you. “You know, the last time I was here, I didn’t remember there being so much flora.” 

As if he had forgotten the miniature forest that surrounded him, he surveyed the plants surrounding him. There was a sea of succulents and ferns and honeysuckle and peonies and almost every other plant under the sun. “Yes, they’re a new addition. And if I recall correctly, it seems that lots of your favorites have made an appearance.”

“It does appear that way.”

He reached out to gently lift one strand of a nearby fern. “I believe you’ve mentioned before that you would ‘take a fern over a flower any day of the week.’”

“That would explain why they seem to be taking over the windowsills of our apartment.”

“True. Did you know that in the Victorian floriography, the fern represented sincerity and humility? So maybe if somebody had made a stupid mistake and they were trying to let someone know that they were really sorry, they might give a fern to say that they know they were being an idiot and they felt really bad for what they did.”

You laughed airily, “No, I was not aware of that fact.”

He closed the gap between you, reaching to tuck an errant lock of hair behind your ear. He simultaneously managed to pull a small bouquet of purple-ish flowers from thin air, causing more laughter to bubble from you. The laughing is a good sign, he thought, grinning. Keep going! “To really drive the point home, they might also give some columbine which represents foolishness.”

You looked up at him, your expression bright. “Oh man, this guy feels really bad.”

“Yeah,” he agreed before his words took a more somber cadence. “Yeah, he does.”

Your face softened. “Spence—” 

“Um, before you say anything else, (Y/N), I just need to let you know how sorry I am for this morning. I love you so, so much, and I never want you to doubt that, and—”

“Spencer, slow down. Really, it’s okay! I’m not mad.”

“Well, I’m glad you’re not angry with me, but it’s not okay because you still deserve an apology. A good apology. So,” he took a deep breath, “I am so very sorry for my actions and for letting you think for even a second that you’re not the most important thing in my life, and I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you that I want to marry you when you asked because I do. I really, really do.”

Something warm and elated simmered in your stomach, and you beamed at him. “I’m glad because I wanna marry you too.” But before you could get too caught up in the moment, you remembered your earlier thoughts. “I don’t want to push you in any way, though, or make you commit to anything before you’re ready because marriage is kind of a big deal, and I’m happy to wait. Spencer Reid, I’d wait for you forever.”

“I don’t want to wait.” He shook his head and began digging in his pocket. 

Your eyes widened in shock and spluttered, “Spence, seriously, if you’re not ready—”

“I am ready.” Finally, he found it and pulled out a small velvet box, looking you dead in the eye. “(Y/N/N), I have been planning this for so long because I wanted it to be perfect for you. You deserve nothing less than the absolute best, and I wanted to give that to you.”

His admission gave you pause. “Wait, you’ve had this planned?”

“I’ve been planning this for months! This isn’t me trying to fumble around and fix my mistake. I have a binder and everything, you can ask Derek. That’s the only reason I said no!”

“You said no because you had a binder for your proposal plan?” you teased.

You both broke out into laughter at that.

Recovering his breath and trying to suppress his ever-growing grin, he said, “No, that’s not why. The only reason I said no earlier is because I needed to show you how much I wanted to say yes. You deserve the best, you deserve every star in the sky and every beautiful thing on this earth, and I wanted to make sure I gave that to you when we decided to spend the rest of our lives together because I want to be enough for you.” Trying to swallow around the slug in his throat, he continued, voice breaking slightly. “This is me giving you all the love I have to offer. You’re it for me, (Y/N). And frankly, I don’t want to spend another second without you.”

He settled on one knee and opened the box, looking up at you with the gentlest gaze and a pounding heart. The wetness of your eyes matched his, and you gave him a watery smile. “I’m saying yes now. I would really, really like to marry you, (Y/N/N), if you’ll still have me.”

“Of course, you absolute dork.” Yanking him up from the ground and grinning like a madman, you grabbed his face and pulled him in for the messiest kiss. He clutched your waist and held you as close as he could possibly manage. (His desire to never be parted seemed to be coming to fruition in the sort of melding of bodies that was occurring.) Clashing teeth and knocking noses, it was hard to settle things when neither of you could stop beaming. Overwhelmed by the complete and utter joy bubbling up in his chest, Spencer hugged you tightly before spinning you in a circle, both of you devolving into boisterous giggles. 

“Wait,” he murmured. “I forgot to give you the ring, I still need to seal the deal!” To which, you responded with another peal of laughter (something he thought he would never tire of hearing), as his trembling fingers floundered for the ring.

“I’m pretty sure that’s not how it works, but I’ll take it either way.”

He finally secured, and taking your hand in his ever so gently tenderly, he slid a glimmering emerald on your finger. 

“Oh, Spencer, it’s beautiful.” He let out a sigh of relief. With light confusion, you asked, “What’s the sigh for, handsome?”

“I know you wanted a special ring, but when I went ring shopping with Derek, there was nothing I thought you’d like, so I special-ordered one from this shop that was going to be your size and everything, but that ring wasn’t going to be ready for a couple weeks. So today, when I knew I had to propose tonight, I ran to that vintage store you love and came across this one, and I thought you’d like it, but I wasn’t sure it was gonna fit, and—”

“I love it,” you looked at him, trying to will him to understand the depth of your sincerity. “And it fits perfectly!”

“How serendipitous.” He thought his face was going to split in half, he was smiling so wide. He couldn’t stop looking at the ring on your finger. How could one silly little rock make tears well in his eyes? Nonetheless, the sight of it made his heart race and his stomach churn with unrepentant butterflies because looking at it, he knew the girl he loved more than anything else on the planet, his favorite person had chosen to spend the rest of her life listening to his rambles and laughing at his jokes and sitting next to him by the pond in the park. The listless dream that had seemed so hopeless and romantic finally came to fruition in that shiny green stone, so no, he would not stop staring. 

“Indeed,” you mused, subtle and irresistible risibility fizzing in the silence that followed. You contemplated for a moment before asking, “What do we do now?”

A thoughtful frown graced his lips, and then he shrugged. “We have the museum until midnight. We could just wander for a bit.”

Your eyes widened to the size of dinner plates and you tugged on his sleeve, your excitement palpable. “I’ve always wanted to be in a museum when no one’s around at night! Oh my god, Spencer, it’s just like Night at the Museum!”

He quirked a brow, and a sly smirk turned up the corners of his mouth. “Does that mean I have to protect you when the dinosaur skeletons come to life?”

You scoffed, “Please, we both know that I’d be the one protecting you.”

Another devolution into giggling. It seemed to be your thing tonight.

“Fair enough.” 

“Also, do we get to keep all of these plants?” His eyes remained glued to your flushed face as you peered around the room. He wasn’t ashamed to admit just how besotted he was, shamelessly beaming at his fiancée. 

“I bought them for you, so yeah.”

“Sick! Our apartment’s gonna turn into a little greenhouse!”

He extended a crooked arm to you, to which you looped yours in his and proceeded to set off on your museum adventure. You learned your head on his shoulder as you walked, completely and perfectly and incandescently happy.

“Hey, Spence?”

“Yes, dear?”

“I love you very much.”

“I love you too, dear.”

[whaleofatjme1920]

Can I ask for an scenario were the proxies have to interact with Charlie? Like, maybe for example the boss sends the 4 of them to Kate’s old house for some reason, or Charlie just wonders into them because he’s scared

Grilled Cheese Sandwiches

[Proxies and Charlie]

[Warnings: like, none?]

[This is like full fic length bc I kinda liked the idea]

“Kate?” Tim’s soft voice called out from the driver's seat. He sees that she’s gazing out the window, lost in her thoughts. A small sigh escapes his lips as he leans back, hand gently patting at Kate’s shoulder. “Kate, we need to go.”

The dark haired woman stirs, blinking rapidly in response. She pauses. “I’m sorry?”

The men in the car laugh, Toby devolving into giggles as he clicks her seatbelt. “We’re h-h-here,” he smiles.

Kate shifts, slightly uncomfortable in her seat as she reaches to unlock the door. There, down the driveway is the house that used to be hers. She slides out, listening as her teammates do the same. Her shoes rest on the gravel and gently press against the earth. She hasn’t been able to see her house in the daylight for goodness knows how long. In fact, most of the time she’s here, it’s nighttime.

“You okay?” Brian asks as he rests his hand on her shoulder before moving to her upper back. He’s gently guiding her to the house.

She shrugs ever so slightly, a cloud overtaking her eyes. “Not sure.”

Brian hums and gently rubs her back as they walk up to the house. “We’ll be in and out, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Tim suddenly cuts in.

“W-Why exactly a-a-a-are we h-here?” Toby asks as he catches up to his three group members, stretching his arms and cracking his neck as he does so.

“Operator said we needed some files or something,” Tim answers. “Shouldn’t be that hard, yeah?”

Kate feels a little on edge and nostalgic when she sees the brick walls that surround her home. She takes a glance around. The yard needs to be done as there’s tall grass and weeds that have overtaken the once pretty garden. Ivy and vines grow over the windows, the brick needs some upkeep - it’s a mess. But surprisingly enough, the swingset is still intact. She walks down the path to her front door and reaches out for the doorknob, opening it and raises her brows to see that it’s open. “Huh,” she murmurs. “Wonder if there have been any squatters in here.”

“Sure hope not,” Brian says as his gloved hands trail the tall grass’ edges. “Means we gotta go out there and hunt them down.”

Tim and Toby both sigh in agreement, grimaces crossing over their faces. This house is practically a time capsule into Operator behavior and the like. It reeks with his energy. This place is only open to proxies, and even then, they have to be cleared proxies. If any humans made it in here, that means they have to get killed. That’s just how it is.

Kate steps into her old house, slightly displeased to see that the house looks eerily similar to how she left it with the minor additions of Lauren’s snooping as well. It doesn’t feel or smell like someone has been in here for a while. She begins to explore the place, her hand on her weapon just in case as her teammates file in.

‘So,’ Tim begins in the back of his proxies’ heads, ‘just a few files. Apparently we’ll know ‘em when we see ‘em.’

Toby snorts slightly. ‘You don’t have anything more solid than that?’

‘No.’

‘They’re bound to have Lauren on them,’ Kate says. ‘It’s uh, just the feeling I get.’

Hums echo throughout the house from her teammates as they split and scope out the house. Kate stands in the kitchen, looking for the files. Nothing so far. She sighs. She was hoping they’d be in and out.

“Any luck?” Brian calls out after deeming the house safe.

“Nope,” Tim calls out from the TV room.

“N-Not here either,” Toby says from one of the upstairs bedrooms.

Kate hums as she opens up the drawers. “Empty,” she says.

Tim sighs and runs his fingers through his hair as he rounds the house, mindlessly looking for the things the Operator asked of them. He’s a little upset that they’re just not out there in the open, but that would be convenient, far too convenient. He begins to look out the window, watching for the birds and other things, anything to just calm down. He pats absentmindedly at his pocket, feeling his pack of cigarettes. “Goin’ out for a smoke,” he says over his shoulder to Kate who is still searching the kitchen.

Tim steps outside and lights up a cigarette, placing it between his lips before sucking in a slow breath. He watches the clouds as they swim in the sky, the sun as it passes overhead. What a beautiful summer afternoon. He’s honestly zoning out when he hears a rustling in the grass. What is that? His head turns and so too do the hairs on the back of his neck. Something is on the grounds and it doesn’t feel human. Tim immediately drops his cigarettes and crushes it under his boot before palming his gun.

Dark eyes begin to scan over the tall grasses as he remains planted at the doorstep. He’s about to call for his teammates in what they lovingly call ‘head talk’ before he sees something peeking out of the tall grass, just outside the brick gates. It has dark hair and sticks out like a sore thumb amongst the lush green. Before Tim can even make any plan of action, it’s up and stalking towards him. He swears under his breath, raising his gun towards the creature.

It hisses, making clicking noises and snarling as it keeps a distance, large hands get held up defensively as Tim growls back.

Kate, in the kitchen, hears this and internally panics. At first, she thought it was some rabid raccoon or something, but she recognizes those clicks. That’s Charlie! She slams her drawer and then rushes out to the front where Tim, Brian and Toby are locked in a standoff with the poor thing.

“Woah, woah!” She cries out, extending her hands as she does so.

“Kate, get back,” Tim hisses, hand reaching out to grab at her collar. He grows in disapproval when she pushes off of him, quickly coming to the zombified proxy’s side.

Upon seeing Kate, the creature pauses. It purrs lowly and lowers his head.

Kate stands in front of him, arms out. “He’s not gonna hurt you.” She gently pushes Charlie back, wanting to get him as far away from her teammates as she can.

“It c-c--could be an o-outlier,” Toby says with narrowed eyes, hand not loosening its grip on his hatchets.

Kate takes in a deep, frustrated breath and shakes her head. “His name is Charlie.” She explains. “He’s what we are.”

“What we are?” Brian asks with a tilt of his head, brow raising, but gun still pointed. “He can’t be.”

Toby nods in agreement. “P-Proxies don’t l-look like t-t-that,” he murmurs with uncertainty.

Tim sighs deeply as he lowers his gun, holstering it. “This is what happens to proxies if the Operator wills it,” he explains, a small grimace on his lips. “It’s the radiation.”

Uncomfortable chills run up and down the spines of Tim’s teammates as they slowly put their weapons away, frowns on their faces.

Charlie tilts his head, though his body language conveys that he’s clearly still distressed over what’s happened. His hands are waving, ready to strike should he need to, teeth bared and ready to snap.

Kate runs her fingers through her hair and waves off her other teammates. “Go back inside, let me handle this,” she commands. “He’s harmless, but you’ve made a bad impression on him.”

“He shouldn’t have been poking in the grass,” Tim says as he crosses his arms over his chest.

Kate sticks out her tongue at him. “Get inside, and bring me two sandwiches.”

“Excuse you?” Tim says in slight surprise.

She looks over her shoulder as she gently grabs Charlie’s large hand, leading him to the swingset that is surprisingly still intact. “Go take a seat buddy,” she guides in a warm tone, watching as Charlie slowly slumps back over to his most natural pose, quietly walking towards the swingset. “You heard me,” Kate calls back over her shoulder.

Tim rolls his eyes and heads back inside, mentally telling Toby to make two sandwiches.

Toby, who is watching as Charlie sits on the swingset, rolls his eyes at Tim’s command before sauntering off to the kitchen. He’s admittedly surprised to pull open the fridge and see it’s stocked with food and there’s fresh bread. ‘What kind of sandwiches did you guys want?’ Toby hums as he rummages through the fridge.

Kate pauses swinging. ‘PB&J would be fine,’ she replies. ‘Really anything goes though, Charlie just looks hungry.’

Toby obliges and frowns for a moment. ‘Do you think you and Charlie can wait a second?’

‘Why?’

‘I have something special in mind.’

Kate hums and then nods. ‘Yeah, take your time, Tobes.’ With Charlie at her side, Kate begins to talk with him, buying Toby some seconds. “So, you feeling alright, buddy?”

Charlie chirps quietly, swinging beside her.

“Did the big guy send you here?”

Charlie nods.

“Is he being mean again?”

Charlie’s eyes lower as he shivers slightly, another solemn nod dragging his head downwards as he focuses on the pretty flowers that grow up from the ground.

Kate furrows her brows with a small frown and stands up from the seat, peeling off her hoodie. She drapes it over Charlie’s shoulders before sitting on the gravel just in front of him, pulling at the pretty pink and blue flowers. “I’m here now, yeah?”

Charlie purrs as he holds the arms of her hoodie, a small smile curling upwards on his face.

Kate hums softly as she weaves him a flower crown.

Inside the house, Toby is almost done with the grilled cheese sandwiches. He’s melting the cheese on the second one when Brian and Tim stroll in, a tad bored from watching Kate and Charlie.

“That’s surprisingly nice of you,” Brian lightly ribs. “Smells good though.”

“Why don’t you ever make these with us?” Tim inquires with a small chuckle.

“I c-c-can make them n-now for u-u-s,” Toby begins, flipping the sandwich. “B-But my s-sister used t-t-to make these w-when I was u-upset. F-Figured C-Charlie needed a p-pick me up,” he explains, a small smile on his lips as he turns off the stove. Toby places it on the plate and grabs it before heading to the front door.

In the front yard, Kate is just finishing placing a flower crown on Charlie’s head. The colors compliment his hair and Kate giggles softly as he coos. “You’re so pretty,” she compliments, gently tapping where his nose should be, making him giggle in response. Her nose picks up the scent of Toby’s cooking and a warm smile spreads over her lips. There he is, in the doorway.

“T-Thought you g-guys would l-like these,” he says as he meets Kate halfway.

“You’re so thoughtful,” Kate smiles as she takes the plate into her hands. “You wanna come say hi to Charlie?”

“I-Is he o-okay with it?” Toby asks, wanting to ensure Charlie won’t get wound up again.

Kate glances over her shoulder to the large cryptid like proxy that is currently playing with the flowers that adorn his head. “He’s fine,” she hums, leading Toby to the swingset. “Hey buddy,” she quietly greets. “Toby made some sandwiches for us.”

Charlie tilts his head curiously at the new scent, both Toby and the grilled cheese. He pokes at it before lifting it.

“It’s s-s-still a little h--hot,” Toby warns as Kate sits him down on one of the swings.

Charlie tilts his head again.

Toby blows a bit on his hand.

Charlie follows in suit before chomping into the sandwich, mouth opening and closing like a dragon due to how hot it is.

Both Kate and Toby laugh.

Brian and Tim watch from the windows as Toby, Kate and Charlie begin to get to know each other, giggles and positive energy flowing between the three of them as they do so.

“Should we let them stay?” Tim hums.

Brian nods, a small smile on his lips. “Yeah, let the kids play.”

Tim chuckles, patting Brian on the back. “You check the basement for those files yet?”

“Nah, did you?”

“Wouldn’t be asking if I did,” Tim grins.

Brian rolls his eyes. “Be right back,” he informs, hazel eyes reluctantly leaving the vision of the swing set.

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed Episode 08 first part

(Masterpost) (Other Canary goodness)

Warning: Spoilers for All 50 Episodes!

Rabbits

The Jiang kids have some quality time with the rabbits. Initially Jiang Cheng says it’s wrong for gentlemen to hold rabbits, which is definitely in no way related to gay-rabbit-god symbolism, but changes his mind when he discovers how fun men rabbits are to cuddle. 

Jiang Yanli says, in a moment with zero foreshadowing, that if they take one rabbit away from the others, it will miss its family and be lonely. Also if a rabbit were to watch from the rooftop while a mean enemy rabbit poured wine on the corpses of its parents, that would be extra upsetting. For a rabbit. So let’s leave all the rabbits where they are. Check. 

Speaking of cute fluffy creatures that are upset, we see this distressed look on Wei Wuxian’s face kinda often when he’s talking with Jiang Cheng.  

There are some sibilng relationships where you will always do anything to help each other because you survived a shitty childhood together, but as adults you find you don’t actually share values, and that your interactions are kinda toxic -- for both of you. This seems like one of those. 

Even though he’s younger, Jiang Cheng is in the role of the elder sibling who is being abused by the parents, and is handing the abuse on down the line to the “younger” sibling, in the form of constant criticism and casual hittings. Wei Wuxian isn’t actually younger, but he is lower ranked because he’s not a blood relation, and he gets plenty of parental abuse as well. It’s...not a healthy family. 

(more after the cut!) 

Lan Wangji has been lurking nearby during this conversation, and after the Jiangs leave, he looks at the rabbits and says farewell.  He clearly means farewell to Wei Wuxian, or else he has a really unhealthy level of yearning being directed toward the rabbits. At least, for a vegetarian.

Uninvited Gusu Guest

Lan Xichen is meditating, and because the Director of Photography loves us, we get a bunch of nice closeups of his exquisite face. He hears a noise thing and tells Wen Chao to come in, which results in a dire bird scream and Wen Chao’s muddy feet intruding on his day. Why did Wen Chao bring the bird with him? He’s trying to be sneaky, right? So...ok whatever.

Wen Chao acts like a dirtbag and menacingly reminds Lan Xichen that his didi just hit the road all by himself. Lan Xichen gets so upset he curls his fingers slightly. His beautiful, beautiful fingers.

Is it slapping time yet?

Road Tripping

Fortunately for the Lan brothers, Lan Wangji isn’t going to be alone for long. Wei Wuxian is determined to follow him, and where friend-maker Wei Wuxian goes, an assortment of other helpful cultivators will soon follow. 

Wei Wuxian leaves a note to say “I’m running away from home with the hot boy I met in summer school” and signs it with a smiley face, the dork. Jiang Cheng is angry, as usual; Yanli has confidence in Wei Wuxian, as usual, and Jiang Fengmian is autocratic and doesn’t explain what he’s thinking, as usual. JF is aware of the Yin Iron, however, so he may understand that WWX will be useful in protecting it on the road.  

Lan Wangji has changed his hair, upgraded his crown, and put on the most absurdly beautiful outfit of the entire show to go on a solo road trip totally without any hot infuriating boys. 

Quick, Lan Wangji, catch this callback to that time you rejected my advances back in Gusu! This time Lan Wangji catches the offered fruit and keeps it, presumably to consume furtively when he wakes in the dead of night, restless with unslaked thirst for Wei Ying. Or, you know, to have with his lunch while they’re riding on the boat. 

This is a level of synchronized walking-with-shoulder-contact that would make the Guardian boys proud. Lan Wangji is all touchy feely now that he’s out from under the eyes at Cloud Recesses. 

He also has upped his troll game, actually smirking after he says “boring” to Wei Wuxian’s declaration of I’m-gonna-come-along-you-can’t-stop-me. 

He also...doesn’t seem angry? Like, he is still seriously on edge, but it feels like he left the boiling rage at home.  Lan Xichen is right; having a friend IS good for Lan Wangji. And for whatever reason, Lan Wangji is ready, now, to accept Wei Wuxian’s friendship.

We Rate Birds

Wen Chao has the weirdest fucking pet. This bird has a resentful energy problem, obvs, but it also seems to be invisible except for resentful energy, but it leaves random feathers behind at places, and then when Wei Wuxian kills it, it’s a regular bird corpse with a little smoke. “Imbued with Yin Iron energy” seems to be the explanation. But Nie Huaisang said they see a lot of these in their neck of the woods. Did he mean “just a regular bird” and didn’t notice the billowing black visual FX? Either way I want to see a nest full of baby dire Yin birds, I bet they’re hideous cute. 

Wen Qing has a new outfit and an elegant fiery golden crown. There’s probably some plot stuff happening here. Wen blah blah Yin Iron blah blah. She’s so pretty. I love her ears and her cool double hair parting. The girls’ hairlines are always nice and soft, presumably because they get to wear their own front hair instead of a lacefront like the boys are glued to stuck with. 

I Call it Bondage

After the fun they had in the ice cave, it’s only fair that Wei Wuxian gets to have a turn tying up Lan Wangji. 

One of the fun things in clipping The Untamed is that the show’s editors generally didn't drop any frames when they intercut the various scenes, meaning that some longer shots can be spliced back together by removing the other camera portions, as with these two string-pulling bits.

Lan Wangji totally lets Wei Wuxian put a leash on him, quickly declaring it boring and taking control of it, pulling Wei Wuxian along behind him. 

Incidentally, at this stage about half of Wei Wuxian’s talisman’s are blue. After he loses his core, they are 100% red, but nobody notices that. Well, maybe Nie Huaisang does because he notices a LOT, but nobody says anything. 

After they play around in the field for a bit, Lan Wangji’s magic bag of plot advancement goes off, sending them to Flower Town. 

He’s Leaving Home Bye Bye

Meanwhile, at Lotus Pier, we get a nice view of the rooftops. I’d hate to be the guy whose job it is to hang up bells and tassels at any of these places. 

Jiang Cheng sneaks out to go join his brother’s road trip. He gets caught, because his idea of sneaking is to walk out the front door in broad daylight and leave the door open behind him. 

Jiang Yanli tells him to go ahead, though and he scampers off to have...the last carefree fun of his entire life, actually. Sigh. 

Flower Town

Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji go to Tanzhou and immediately run into Nie Huaisang, because sure, why not. China’s not very big.

Lan Wangji’s startle response

Wei Wuxian’s startle response

Nie-Xiong and Wei-Xiong are delighted to see each other, once Wei Wuxian explains that Lan Wangji isn’t there to bust them. 

While Wei Wuxian and Nie Huaisang squee over each other, Lan Wangji ...tries to deal with that. His reaction is probably a mix of jealousy and social anxiety. This town has got to be overwhelming for him after the order and quiet of Cloud Recesses; he even admits--aloud!--that it’s too crowded for him at one point. Add in his boyfriend’s travel partner’s number one enabler, and it’s not a comfortable situation.

Oh great now they’re going to want me to get high and make out with them, ugh

However, with Lan Wangji in the mix, the Nie-Wei dynamic shifts away from mischief making, and they very quickly become a friend trio sharing a serious purpose. When Wei Wuxian, in his second life, refers to NHS as “that old friend of ours” when talking to LWJ, he’s not wrong. Nie Huaisang and Lan Wangji become friends during this trip, and arguably remain friends, within the limits of Nie Huaisang’s revenge remit. 

From one point of view, Nie Huaisang is grown-up Lan Wangji’s very best friend (not counting his eventual husband). Everyone in the cultivation world knows what Lan Wangji’s heart desires most, after Nightless City, and Nie Huaisang gives it to him. By, uh, manipulating a crazy guy into ritual suicide. Hey, no gift is perfect.

Continued in Next Post! Soon!

[theimpossiblehologramtree]

Making Queen members flower crowns would include

Pairing: Queen members x reader

Word count: (altogether) 1800+

Warnings: some sickening fluff, oh and swearing but that’s a standard, some slightly suggestive themes in john’s (implied sex) but nothing accually happens except a kiss

A/N: Hello you beautiful people! I’m back (don’t get used to that tho lol) I thought of this two years ago when i first saw Bohemian Rhapsody (SO 2 FUCKING YEARS AGO). Freddie’s is gender neutral. I tried to add a “keep reading” button but I’m not sure it works tbh because this hell of a side never cooperates.

Please keep in mind that English is not my first language.

🐝masterlist🐝

REQUEST IF YOU WANT MORE

☕buy me a Ko-fi!☕

Gifs aren’t mine. Credits to the owners.

Brian May

You were laying on Brian's lap, the sun hitting your face pleasantly. This week the weather was nice and warm, which was something extremely unusual in England, so the two of you decided to head out to the country and have a little picnic.

After what felt like hours spent in the car ("Brian, for Christ's sake, would you open the bloody window, I can't breathe!" and "Bri, I love you, but if we don't get there in five minutes, I'm going to murder you, I swear") you finally found a nice clearing, where you could relax and forget about the stresses of city life.

Brian put down a blanket on the grass, near a small stream that flew through the forest. He brought the bag with food and drinks (you didn't have a basket, so you had to improvise). 

You quickly put some sunscreen on your face and laid down, keeping your head propped on Brian's lap. He put a hat over his face and fell asleep, his chest rising steadily. 

After some time (that fucking wasp didn't let you sit in one place), you stood up and noticed many beautiful flowers, growing on a nearby bush. You got lost in picking up the most beautiful ones, admiring each one carefully. When you got enough, you sat back down and started tying the stems together.

Suddenly you got an idea. Careful not to wake him up, you began sticking the flowers in Brian's dark curls. 

Your now decorated boyfriend woke up and stretched, not noticing the colourful addition to his hair. This made you chuckle softly, but you decided to see how long it would take him to realize.

+"What is it, babe? Do I have something on my face?"

"No, Bri, I just remembered a funny joke, that's all."

"Oh tell me, then."

"What’s the difference between a lawnmower and an electric guitar?"

"Hm?"

"You can tune a lawnmower!"

You both enjoyed the rest of the day swimming in the stream, sunbathing and eating the snack you brought. And Brian somehow still didn't notice.

Until it was time for you to get home.

You got in the car ("Open the window now, it's like in the oven in here!") and Brian looked into the rear-view mirror.

+"Hey, (Y/N), what the fuck is that? I love it."

Roger Taylor

So honestly it would probably happen during one of his concerts.

You were backstage watching the show, enjoying every second of it. Freddie was in the middle of shouting some (very inappropriate) compliments to Brian's ass, slapping his buttcheeks. The crowd immediately went wild hundreds of fans screamed in unison. You chuckled under your breath, flashing a white smile at your beloved boyfriend Roger and his bandmates. You felt an arm wrap around your shoulders. Surprised, you turned around, your eyes meeting Mary's.

+"What's up, kiddo?" she smirked and patted your back.

"Oh, nothing much. Just Freddie being Freddie," you replied, making both of you erupt with laughter.

Suddenly you felt a familiar feeling form in the pit of your stomach. Out of nowhere, your hands became shaky, your breath shallow and quick. Feeling like you need some fresh air, you excused yourself.

+"Are you sure you're okay, (Y/N)?" Mary watched you carefully, her hand supporting you in case you fainted.

"Yes, Mary, I just need some fresh air. I'm extremely tired, and I haven't eaten anything since this morning" you reassured your friend. "I'm just gonna sit outside for a while."

"Do you want me to come with you?" she asked, still not convinced about your well-being.

"Yes, I wouldn't want to spoil the gig for you. I'll be back before you know it" you squeezed her hand and, after promising her to be careful, you headed outside.

You took a walk alongside the small patch of lawn beside the exit. After taking a couple of deep breaths, you noticed some daisies grow in the green grass. Without thinking much, you sat down and started picking them up and tying their stems together.

Your fingers worked quickly, making a beautiful flower crown, mindlessly.

Meanwhile, on stage, the boys were singing She makes me - a song that reminded Roger of you. He quickly glanced to his right, expecting to see your beautiful figure standing with Mary. But, much to his surprise, he couldn't see you anywhere. It was no secret that his eyesight was shit but, bloody hell, it wasn't that bad. His blue eyes were searching for you, frantically.

When the song ended, he quickly motioned to Freddie to take a quick break, while he went to check up on you. He practically sprinted to Mary, almost knocking down his drumkit and John.

+"You dumb fuck, watch where you're going, Rog!"

Usually, Roger would reply with some snarky comment, but at that moment he really didn't care. When he reached Mary, he didn't even need to ask her about you. 

+"She's outside. Needed some fresh air" the girl shooked her head towards the exit. 

Roger quickly walked outside, knowing that he couldn't stall the audience for too long. But at the same time, he must have made sure you were all right.  

He got out of the building and searched for you. He spotted to sitting on a small patch of grass, holding a pretty flower crown in your hands. His heart ached at this sight. 

+"Hello, love" he whispered, kneeling next to you. "Are you all right?"

"Yes, I am, Rog" you kissed his cheek. "I just felt a bit off, that's all." 

You felt your boyfriend press a kiss to your hair. You smiled at the feeling, leaning into his touch. 

You finally placed the finished flower crown on his head, brushing away loose strands of sweaty hair from his face, your hand gently brushing his temple. He took your tiny hands in his and kissed your fingers.

+"Do you wanna go back in there, sweetheart?" he asked sweetly, looking deeply into your eyes.

You nodded and pecked his lips, "Of course, Rog, I wouldn't want to miss any more of your show."

He smiled and lead you inside, placing his hand on the small of your back. You returned to Mary and wished your boyfriend good luck. 

Roger kept the flowers on his head throughout the whole gig, sending you a dashing smile and winking at you every now and again.

I just think Roger would look sososo pretty in a flower crown.

John Deacon

It was a lovely afternoon in London. You and your fiancé John decided to take a walk after the whole day in the studio, recording songs.

Taking a walk in a nearby park was a great way to destress and release the tension accumulated during the day. It was something John realized pretty early on in your relationship and took full advantage of it. He loved wandering along the pebbled pathways that swirled around beautiful trees and bushes full of colourful flowers. Being in the presence of nature made him feel at ease and helped him relax.

But the real reason why he enjoyed your walks so much was you. He adored seeing your face light up with joy when you saw a squirrel run up a branch of an old oak or when you spotted a particularly beautiful fish in the small pond. He could watch you pick up fallen leaves for ages and hear you talk to little kids in a playground, showing them the shiny rocks you collected along the way.

To be honest, he always dreamt about starting a family with you and seeing you get along with kids so well only increased that desire.

Often after a walk, he was in the mood™, which, considering his shy nature, always took you by surprise.

Oh man, he just loved taking a walk in the park.

And today was no different.

You were walking hand in hand, admiring the blossoming flowers. Occasionally, you would stop and pick them up, making a small bouquet in the process. White daisies, pink clovers and blue forget-me-nots accumulated with every step you took.

John was telling you about the new idea he had for a song, kissing your cheek every now and again.

Listening to him, you started to fiddle with the flowers, tying them in knots. After a while ("And then, I think, we could include a gong, you know?") you were done with your creation.

You put the flowers on John's head and kissed his temple.

+"What's that, darling?" he asked you, surprised.

"Nothing, but I think you look sensational, my love" you replied, smiling innocently.

You felt John's hand bring you closer to him. He kissed you, entangling his long and incredibly skilled fingers in your hair. The kiss soon turned into more heated one.

+"I'll show you how sensational I really am, pretty girl."

Freddie Mercury

So with Freddie, it was probably at one of his parties.

He invited you along to have a drink with him and his bandmates.

You usually weren't the one for big and loud parties, but he kept asking you and you gave in.

+"Oh okay, Fred, I'll do it," you said after the twentieth time he had asked you.

"Fantastic, (Y/N)!" he exclaimed, loudly clapping his hands. "Just remember to wear a costume."

But you didn't really want to dress up in fancy dresses or costumes from different eras. Calling Mary, you asked her for advice and she told you to just wear some accessories.

So before the party, you went to a small flower shop and bought a small bouquet of purple lilacs. At home, you made a flower crown, hoping that dressing up as a nymph would be enough.

When you got to Freddie's house, you were greeted by a crowd of people in colourful skirts and suits with fashionable patterns. That's when you found Freddie, Roger, Brian and John, chilling on a couch with their dates.

+"Oh, (Y/N), you look marvellous, darling!" exclaimed Freddie dressed as a king, while he stood up to embrace you in a warm hug.

"Thank you, Fred, I made it myself" you smiled shyly.

You got some champagne and joined the conversation.

Suddenly, you felt a pat on your shoulder, and, when you turned around, you saw Freddie holding out a hand to you, asking you to dance with him. You gladly accepted and got up. 

+"I really meant it, darling. You do look marvellous tonight" he whispered in your ear.

"Thank you, Freddie, you can have it if you'd like" you sent him a warm smile.

You took off his golden crown and set it aside. Gently taking off the flower crown from your head, you placed it on top of Fred's. He beamed at you and put his own crown on top of your head.

+"Now you rule here, darling."

taglist

[avengerscompound]

The Tower: Family - 23

The Tower: Family An Avengers Fanfic

Series Masterlist PREVIOUS //

Pairing:  Avengers x OFC, Bruce Banner x Bucky Barnes x Clint Barton x Wanda Maximoff x Steve Rogers x Natasha Romanoff x Tony Stark x Thor x Sam Wilson x OFC (Elly Cooper)

Word Count: 1945

Warnings:  Pregnancy, smut (MFF bisexual threesome, Vaginal fingering, vaginal sex, oral sex, electro stimulation, the use of wanda’s powers in a sexual way)

Synopsis: With new powers, Thor now living on Earth full time, a wedding to plan, and Natasha and Wanda expecting, a lot is changing for Elly and her large and rather unconventional family.  When Elise’s parents try to reestablish connections, Elly questions what being a family actually means.

Chapter 24: The Photoshoot

The baby shower that had been strictly no gifts had ended up with a handful of gifts anyway.  They were mostly clothes - though Sam’s sister bought a breast pump that she had sworn by, while Loki and Angela had brought protective totems from Asgard.  There were a few plush or little wooden toys from people too.  Rhodey had bought all the kids, starting from Riley and Pietro, Cat in the Hat t-shirts.  Riley’s was labeled Thing One, Pietro’s Thing two, and then there were four tiny baby t-shirts labeled things three through six.  Phil got a little bundle of onesies that had funny little round cat-like blobs on them and the slogan ‘I love all my mommies and daddies’.

The party was fun but exhausting and Wanda, Natasha, and I all ended up going to bed early that night and sleeping right through.

Afterward, Wanda was very excited about doing a pregnancy photoshoot.  It wasn’t too hard to convince Natasha to in the end.  Partially because the pregnancy had been going so well for her and she wanted to commemorate the time she finally got past everything the Red Room had done to her.  But mostly it was just because she loved Wanda so much and she wanted her to have anything that made her happy.

We all headed out to the Avengers facility in upstate New York for the photos.  It was surrounded by forest and by the river so that we could give Wanda the full Earth mother vibe that she’d been cultivating.

We had three ideas in mind.  One was outside and two would be in the old house.  We started with the tamest version.  Wanda, Natasha, and I all put on long, flowing georgette gowns, our hair loose, with flower crowns.  Wanda wore magenta with matching roses, Natasha - black with black orchids, dotted with red poppies, and I wore a sky blue with delphinium and sea holly.

We were going with a family shoot to start with so everyone else wore white linen.  The kids both had baby’s breath threaded through their hair and were very excited to be out in the woods with the family and the dogs.  We did photos of them kissing tummies.  Of our whole group walking in a line through the woods with Wanda, Natasha, and I in the middle.  All of us lying in the grass everyone cuddles up to the three pregnant women.  Photos of hoards of hands on bellies.   All the standard pictures you see when you think of pregnancy photoshoot in the woods only there was a gaggle of us.

When the kids seemed to grow bored of the photoshoot we all headed back to the house so Wanda, Natasha, and I could change and they could play with the toys they hadn’t seen for the last month since we’d been back.

Wanda, Natasha, and I changed into lace gowns the same colors as the others.  These weren’t normal lace gowns though.  They were strapless, and while the empire cut bodice was solid the skirt was completely transparent and opened right down the middle exposing our bellies.  We paired the dresses with lace boyleg panties.  Wanda wore black, Natasha red, and I wore white.

We stayed inside for these photos and posed in sexier and more intimate poses with each other.  We would drape ourselves over couches and the bed.  We cuddle up to each other and put our hands on each other’s exposed bellies.  There were photos of us kissing and caressing each other.

Finally, we stripped down to our underwear for the last part of the shoot and hopped in a tub with milky white water together.  The photographer decorated the outside of the tub with flowers and candles and floated flowers around us in the tub, so the three of us were all floating, with our heads on the edge and our bellies poking out of the water towards the middle, our legs tangled together in the water.

By the time we were done, I was pretty tired and hungry.  We changed into sweats and ate with the others before the three of us went to take a nap.

I woke up to a shift of the bed beside me as the whole thing swayed.  I opened my eyes as whoever had climbed into bed with us wrapped his arms around me and turned to see Thor.  Natasha was already gone and Wanda had started to stir beside me.

“Good evening, my queen,” Thor said, kissing my neck.  “I was sent to wake you up.”

“You gonna do it by getting me all worked up?” I complained, backing my ass against him.

“You’re always waking us with kisses and soft touches,” Thor said.  “I was merely returning the favor.”

“You’re not an overly hormonal pregnant woman,” I huffed.

“No, that is true,” he chuckled.  “I am a man though.”

I started giggling and Wanda moved closer to us.  “What’s happening?”

“Dinner will be served shortly,” Thor explained.  “I was sent to come and wake the both of you.”

“By getting me all turned on,” I pouted.

“I can tell,” Wanda teased.  “Which isn’t helping me at all.”

“I am sure I can help both of you with your problem before the meal is served,” Thor said as his fingers traced over Wanda’s nipples.  “Who would like to go first?”

“Elise,” Wanda said, quickly.  “The two of you can bring me close before you touch me.”

“As you wish, my love,” Thor said, leaning over and kissing her deeply.

As the two of them kissed, Thor slipped his hand into my pants and began to slowly roll his hips against my back.  I could feel his erection starting to press into me as he rutted against me, but he took his time, teasing my clit and kissing the side of my neck.

Wanda leaned forward and kissed me, her lips parted as they brushed over mine, and I followed her lead, bringing my tongue out to meet hers.  I moaned softly into the kiss and ran my hand up into her hair.  She hummed and shifted closer, our bellies touching against each other.

She pulled back and lifted my shirt over my head.  As she did thor pushed my pants and panties down in one go.  He shucked off his own clothes and pulled me tighter against him, so his erection sat against my asscrack.  Each time he rolled his hips his shaft moved up and down the crevice.

His hand returned to my cunt as Wanda leaned down and pulled one of my nipples into her mouth.  I mewled and tugged on her hair as my arousal started to seep from within me.  Thor’s fingers worked my clit quickly and with practiced ease, sending shivers running through me and making my whole body vibrate in anticipation of more.  A small spark danced off his fingertips, sparking against my clit.  I gasped and came then and there with no warning, jerking between them as my cunt spasmed.

Thor chuckled.  It was a deep booming sound that made me feel warm right to my core.  “That was quick.”

“You cheated,” I teased playfully.

“I am sorry, let’s see if I can do this properly,” he laughed, and lined his cock up at my entrance.

“Don’t do anything to hurt the babies,” Wanda said, looking over my shoulder at Thor.

“My life,” Thor said.  “I am a fertility god, I know what I’m doing.”

I started giggling but it was cut off by a gasp as Thor thrust into me.  He didn’t allow any time for me to adjust, he just began to thrust into me from behind.  Wanda resumed sucking on one breast and then the other.  She was feeding off both mine and Thor’s pleasure, and as we began to moan with it, so did she.

She flicked her wrist and a small ball of pink light ran down my skin, between my legs, and began to vibrate against my already oversensitive clit.  I mewled and jerked back between them, my legs trembling.  One of my hands tightened in Wanda’s hair and I reached behind me and gripped Thor’s arm with the other, tethering myself to them both.

“Oh god,” I gasped, quivering between them.  “Won’t last.”

“Whenever you want, Elise,” Thor rumbled as he continued to snap his hips into me.

I tried to relax, but my muscles spasmed and clenched.  I dug my fingers into Thor’s arm and he wrapped his hand around my throat and tilted my head back to him, fiercely kissing me.

Things became hazy and I couldn’t focus on anything except the building pressure in my cunt and the tendrils of pleasure that spread out from my breasts.  Wanda increased the buzz from her energy projection and moaned loudly as my cunt suddenly seized up.  I cried out, breaking the kiss with Thor as I came hard, shuddering between them.

Thor slowed his pace, fucking me through my orgasm before slipping out of me and climbing over us both.  He positioned himself behind Wanda so he was spooning her the way he did me, and cradled her carefully.  I kissed my way down her body as helping Thor undress her as Thor rutted slowly against her.  When we’d removed her shirt, I latched on to one of her breasts and sucked on her nipple, drawing a sharp gasp from her.  Thor pushed her pants off and began to slide his cock up and down her soaked folds.

I kissed down lower, over her baby bump where the strings of light only I could see connected me to both her and the twins growing inside her, and down to her cunt.  Thor adjusted her hips back and eased his cock inside her.  She moaned softly and I lifted her leg and began to lap at the place where they joined and up over her clit.

“Oh!”  She gasped and her hands tightened in the sheets.

“Are you okay, my beloved?”  Thor asked.

“Oh yes, Thor,” she mewled.

He began to thrust and I sucked greedily on her clit.  The flavor of her arousal filled my mouth as I lapped up her fluids.  They were musky and sweet and heady in a way that almost made me drunk on her.  Each flick of my tongue made her moan more loudly and she seemed to have trouble controlling her limbs.  She gripped at the sheets pulling them free from the edge and she kicked out, her toes curling.

Her clit began to twitch under my tongue as her breathing became ragged and Thor’s hips started moving faster, stuttering as he came closer to his own release.  I sucked Wanda’s clit into my mouth and flicked my tongue quickly back and forth over it and with a loud cry, Wanda came, her powers flaring out and engulfing us like an embrace.

Thor groaned and jerked up into her, releasing.  I could feel the pulse of his cock at the base against my mouth as he filled her.  Their fluids mixed together and leaked from Wanda down Thor’s shaft.  I licked up the cocktail of their arousal greedily and climbed back up the bed as Thor slipped from Wanda.

“Now, now, my loves,” Thor scolded, sitting up.  “We have to join the others for dinner.  You can’t go back to sleep.”

“Just five more minutes,” I joked, cuddling up to Wanda, making her giggle.

Thor gave my butt a playful spank.  “Come along.  None of that.”

Wanda and I got up, laughing as Thor helped us get redressed and we headed down to join the rest of our family.

// NEXT

[m-aster-of-spinjitzu]

orange and gold

...I just need more Cole and Vania content, they seem like they'd be great friends.

Basically it's just 'Cole goes to visit her there, they almost burn down the kitchen, and make way too many puns', lol.

Set a few months after Master of the Mountain, but before Seabound or The Island.

Also yeah, I couldn't think of a better title, sue me- I just know that they wear one of the colours at some point, so... 🤦‍♀️😂

Trigger warnings: none I think? Huh-

Also, bingo!! I really need to learn better time management, dear freaking gosh- I hope I'm not too late though? I know it's like half a day late, eek- and I was supposed to post this earlier, but I ended up literally falling asleep while writing it😂

Thank you so much Fabro, for hosting such a cool event!:D Your comments on my fics literally never fail to make my day<3. And I'm so glad that I met so many awesome, really skilled people through this event too - it's been a lot of fun working alongside y'all:D, I wish I'd had more time to interact instead of posting stuff and vanishing lol, but exams be like:////

Prompt: cooking (does baking count as cooking? I realized too late lol-) from @ninjago-bingo 's warm board.

Word Count: 2497

---

Trying to escape from killer dire-bats hadn't been on Cole's to do list today - although the mountains were kind of beautiful.

It was a bit difficult to see them while he was being dragged to his death, but hey, didn't Jay always tell them to be more positive?

That was, until he made the mistake of looking down.

Miles of snowcapped mountains touched the pastel blue sky, but he was more focused on exactly how high he was from the ground.

Great.

Trying to swing back onto the Bounty, he didn't notice a golden-winged blur shoot past the bat, almost dropping their spear in haste.

"Let my friend go, or I'll-"

"Vania?"

She throws the spear at the bird, successfully knocking one of its wings.

Huh. She must've been practicing - throwing with accuracy while flying seemed kinda difficult.

"I'm so sorry!" she replies, grabbing his arm before he fell down too. She winces at the strain on her wings, almost dropping him onto the deck. "I was supposed to come earlier, but there was an issue with one of the mines, and it took forever to-"

"There ain't anything in this world that's managed to kill me yet," he replies jokingly, checking that the autopilot hadn't been damaged. "I doubt an angry bird is going to be the first."

"Didn't you mention that you became a ghost once? Pretty sure that means you were dead-"

"Shh, that's not an important detail," he jokes.

"If you say so," she replies with a grin. "Did I mention that Chompy's been tearing down the palace flower arrangements again?"

"Send my regards to the gardener-"

"Did you just make a pun?"

"Remind me why I decided to visit you again?"

"Because you love me?" she asks stepping onto the ground as the Bounty landed gently.

"I hereby crown you as my platonic soulmate," Cole deadpans, taking her hand. "Vania and Cole-"

"Destined to annoy each other for eternity," she giggles, swinging their hands up and down. "But seriously - thanks. I don't think I realized how much work being a queen was."

"What's it like?"

"I mean - I'm glad that people trust me, and they come to me if they have a problem, but the paperwork is a nightmare. I never get to go outside anymore, I swear."

"Paperwork? Also, you just invited me here for a week. I don't wanna disturb you?"

"Nah, I cleared my schedule, don't worry. And trust me, you don't want to know. Everything requires some sort of official written thing, and it's so boring-"

"Official? But you're the queen?"

"Well, yeah, but I don't really want to change something unless it benefits the people. Not after..."

Her smile dims, eyes straying to the palace walls.

Oh- oh.

"You're nothing like him," Cole says firmly, squeezing her hand. "I mean, if you need to take a break, or you can make your job a bit easier by cutting out something unnecessary, that's just gonna help you become a better queen. You've definitely got the interests of your people at heart, and that's the most important thing, you know? And well, uh, everything seems to be going great so far - you don't have to beat yourself up over someone else's mistakes."

"Thanks," she replies softly, her smile slowly returning. "Speaking of breaks, what do you think we should do this time?"

"You could show me around the city again?"

"You've already seen everything cool," Vania giggles, skipping ahead of him. "We don't renovate much - unlike you guys-"

"Hey, it's not our fault that our city gets destroyed every few months-"

"More like every few days," she teases, tying back her golden hair. "How about we find some dragons to adopt?"

"Tempting, but where would you keep them?"

"They could sleep in my room-"

She breaks off when she notices him laughing. "What?"

"N- nothing," Cole replies, in between laughs. "Jay and I just made a bet."

"On what?"

"How many dragons you've adopted. I bet at least six, he bet fifteen."

"Well, jokes on both of you - I'm pretty sure my advisor's going to throw a fit if I show up with another one," she starts, giggling. "We've got twenty living in the palace right now."

"Twenty dragons?"

"They're so cute! You just look into their adorable little eyes," Vania pauses for breath, continuing her animated gesturing, "and you can't help but wanna hug them!"

"Oh, Jay's going to be so mad."

"Aww, I'm sorry guys. They're just too adorable!"

"...Wanna hear a funny story?"

"Yeah, sure!"

"I actually used to be terrified of dragons-"

"No way!" Vania exclaims. "Y'all have been on a lot of adventures though, so-"

"Nah, we used to have our own dragons at first. They were pretty cool! I just- I'm a simple guy! Huge animals with wings are scary up close when you're barely a teenager."

"Or when you're really short-"

"We're the same height!" Cole exclaims, facepalming in a bit of a fondly exasperated way.

"I'm two years younger than you-"

---

"Ugh, whose idea was this?"

"Yours," Vania grins, sitting down on the kitchen counter.

"You were supposed to help me, not leave me high and dry!" Cole accuses jokingly, staring at all the appliances they'd found in the cupboards.

"'One must always be prepared for new adventures,'" she quotes seamlessly, waving one of- what was his name again? Mulch something? Oh! Clutch! Some explorer he was, leaving them to die in the pyramid - Clutch Powers' books in the air.

"Fine," he sighs, staring at the old recipe book she'd found in one of their back cupboards. "But you've gotta help me? I almost burned down-" "Woah, what? If you finish that sentence with 'kitchen'-" "In my defense, Kai was playing a prank on me-" "In my defense, I wouldn't like to explain how the queen of Shintaro burnt down the palace by teaching one of her friends to cook," she grins, flipping through the pages. "What do you wanna start with?" "Something simple?" "Have you ever tried baking bread before? It's a lot of fun!" "I haven't really had the time, but that sounds kinda interesting."

He skims the recipe, raising his eyebrows. "Wait, why does this take hours? I thought you said it was simple?"

"Trust me, it is," she laughs, adding, "besides, I still wanna hear about all your adventures!" "Uh... okay," Cole replies hesitantly, "but if this fails, I'm so sorry." "Give yourself some credit, you guys literally saved the world! Multiple times!" "Bold of y'all to assume we know how we did it," he laughs, only half-kidding. "Besides. I botched soup once."

"I've botched toast," she mock-sighs, smiling. "Pretty sure that makes us even."

"Lemme get this straight. You've messed up toasting bread, but you can bake it from scratch?"

"Trust me, I don't know either," she giggles, trying to open a brightly coloured packet of... something? Did flour come in packets that small?

"Uh, why are you opening something called 'feast'?" he asks, eyebrows creased in confusion.

"Feast," she echoes, trying to stifle her laughter. "Off to a... rocky start, aren't we?"

It took him a second.

"I already regret this," he jokes, facepalming. "But I'd say that your puns are, uh, gold."

"I've un- unleashed-" breaking off, she half-falls off the counter, laughing so hard her face starts to go red, "a monster."

---

"Uh, is it supposed to look like that?" Cole asks, frowning.

The mixture looked less like the dough he'd been expecting - more like one of Jay's inventions gone wrong.

Badly wrong, he thought, eyes widening at the goopy mess of foam that threatened to spill over the jug.

"The yeast?" Vania echoes, poking her head out of one of the cupboards. "Yeah, all good! It always looks a little gross, and you're gonna doubt ever eating bread again, but at least it doesn't taste like it's fermented-"

"It's what?"

"Yeah," she grimaces, exaggerating her disgust a bit. "If aliens ever fell from the sky, they'd think we were crazy for eating bread-"

"Aliens? I think we're a bit crazy!" Cole exclaims, trying not to laugh.

Vania smiles, then sighs, lugging a huge bag of flour onto the counter. "I can never open these bags properly," she starts, eyeing the the bag a bit warily, "and it always makes such a huge mess all over the kitchen. You'd think they'd make it easier for people to use, right? I swear-"

He jokingly puts his hands over his ears. "I can't hear you!" "But you know that I've sworn off swearing-" she replies, breaking off with a laugh. "Pun not intended - that actually made sense in my head. I swear!"

"No," Cole interjects with a grin, shaking his head. "You don't, remember?"

"See, this is why we're friends-"

"Friends? Is that all I am to you?"

"Oh, be quiet," she shoots back, exaggeratedly dragging a hand down her face. "I mean, sure, just because everyone thinks that we're dating doesn't mean that we-"

Wait. What?

"People think that we're dating?" he asks, clamping a hand over his mouth in a poor attempt to muffle his laughter. "I- I- really?"

"I know, right?"

"Even my friends thought so at first," he confesses, dragging a hand down his face. "I mean, as much as I love you-"

"I love you too," Vania replies, completely seriously. "Even if you'll always be more like an annoying-"

"Hey-"

"Sibling to me than anything else," she finishes, grabbing a pair of scissors. Cole watches, a little alarmed, as she stabs them into the flour bag over and over.

"Is it... supposed to be this difficult to just open the bag? Seems kinda stupid-"

"Well, er, they have this piece of paper with glue that you're supposed to pull away from the rest of the bag, but it never works properly and I-"

"Well, we could always make our own flour," Cole interjects, laughing. "I mean, I've got a scythe? Let's go!"

"Uh, but we don't have wheat growing here. I don't think it'd suit the climate very well?"

"Wheat a shame," Cole sighs jokingly, measuring out the flour (which had, finally, escaped the bag).

"Oh my gosh," Vania deadpans, "you did not just-"

"Yep, I did."

"You're horrible," she giggles, "then again, I was the one who started this whole debacle, so I think we'll share the blame."

"Debacle? Where'd you pick that one up from? Sounds kinda cool-"

"Oh, it's from a book someone wrote about you guys," Vania says casually, pouring a cup of water into the bowl.

"Hey, uh-" Cole starts hesitantly, twisting his fingers back and forth, then breaks off. "Why'd you read all that stuff about us, anyways? Adventure books don't really seem like something you read a lot, since we have similar favorite books. I mean..."

"Well, um..." Vania trails off, clearly uncomfortable. "Uh- I guess, well, it sounds kinda stupid, but I'd never really met anyone my age who wasn't a royal or something. I... er, I didn't want to be left out, you know?"

Cole thinks back to a scroll; a quest, a sacrifice. One that his friends never seemed to really notice, unless it was with horror or flinches. Not that he blamed them, but - joking about how he was much more useful to the team when he was freaking dead than he was before he'd stumbled and fell in the temple?

That had been a bit far, even for his best friend. Locks could always be picked or something, he didn't need to be a ghost to provide some sort of value-

Well, that's not completely true, is it? a small voice questions, and he can't keep his hands from shaking a little.

"Jay here thinks you're the least valuable ninja."

Not enough to be a performer. Now, not good enough to even be a ninja, apparently.

Well, he reminds himself firmly, you don't have to be the best - just stand up to those who are cruel and unjust.

Nothing but a scar that glowed warm orange occasionally left of the whole Cursed Realm ordeal, sometimes it was all too easy to forget - or pretend - that it had never even happened in the first place.

Other times, like when he'd dropped a glass of water on the floor and his hands hadn't stopped shaking for hours, or when he woke up screaming, expecting to fall through his bed again, it still felt like he was trapped as a ghost. Literally - and maybe a little figuratively as well.

Yeah. Yeah, I know.

"Thanks for trusting me with that," he replies softly. "And I'm sorry. That sounds... horrible, but, honestly, you're a pretty cool person, and I ain't just saying that because we're friends. People can be awful, and they can- they can leave, but you don't need to pretend to be someone you're not for people to accept you. I kinda know what it's like, and it's... just, uh, not great."

"No, thank you," Vania says, rubbing her eyes. "You're pretty cool, too. And I'm glad that we become friends, even if wasn't in the- the, er, greatest circumstances."

"Right back at ya. The fall was pretty terrifying, though," Cole says casually, as if memories of that nightmarish plunge into the depths of earth don't still send shivers down his spine.

"No, definitely! I was so sure we were gonna splat onto the ground or something, thank gosh we didn't."

"Yeah..." Cole trails off, reading the recipe they'd been following. "Oh- do we just leave the bowl somewhere for a few hours now?"

"Oh, yeah," Vania answers. "Other than clean up the kitchen, what else do you wanna do?"

"That's kind of you, but, ah, I don't mind. You can choose something."

"I don't mind either," she replies, covering the bowl with a dishcloth. "Seriously, I don't."

"Same here though."

"Really, I don't mind-" Vania breaks off with a laugh, adding, "Well, actually, there is something."

She doesn't elaborate, thoughtfully gazing out the window.

"Well, what is it? Don't keep me in the dark."

"Ugh, it's kinda stupid-"

"I'm sure that it's not- well, unless you want to try to jump off a flying ship with a homemade parachute to prove a bet to someone-"

"Do I even wanna know?"

"...uh, probably not. We're way too crazy sometimes, our Master has a hard time keeping us in check. Your thing, though?"

"Can I give you a hug?"

Cole blinks for a second, expecting some sort of punchline.

"That's your thing?"

"Well, yeah- I mean, I said it was kinda stupid-"

"No no, that's not what I meant. You're so sweet - that's all."

"Well, not more than you-"

"Nah, you're sweeter-"

"Let's just call it a tie," Vania says with a smile, reaching over to give her friend a hug. "Thank you so much, I swear- well, no, I don't, but you know, anyways-"

"Yeah," Cole replies, laughing softly. "I know."

[willow-salix]

Ok, so, here's the next chapter.

It's a wee bit weird, so feel free to skip most of it, it won't affect the story at all. It's just there, doing it's thing.

Here's the first part, you can follow the link to read the rest of dip out here if you don't want to read a full ritual.

---

“What do you mean Lin is in the hospital?” Selene gasped, unable to believe her ears. “I just saw him no more than...” she glanced at her phone, “four hours ago.”

“Yeah, well, that was before the arrow hit him,” Vera snorted, tugging at Selene’s dress as she unzipped it and yanked it down.

“Arrow? What arrow?” Selene asked, her voice muffled as a new dress was slung over her head.

“The one that hit him in the leg,” Alegra answered as she bustled past with an armful of candles, clearly heading outside to the circle clearing.

“What the hell was he doing to get shot in the leg?”

“Teaching an archery class, it appears someone had very bad aim. One legged Linden strikes again,” Alegra replied.

“That name is because he is the master of Tree pose, not because he only has one working leg!" Selene argued, starting to feel more than a little stressed. “Who the hell is going to be my Priest if Linden is out of action? There’s no one else I’ve worked with enough to even have a connection with let alone one enough to raise the power needed for the circle.”

“Don’t you worry your head about it,” Vera snapped, tugging violently on Selene’s arm, yanking her down in a chair where she sat as still as a statue, allowing the old lady to attack her hair. “Tanzi said she had a plan, so give her some time to see what she can pull out of her arse before you start your panic flapping.”

“But there isn’t anyone here,” Selene argued. “Why don’t we let Tanzi take my place, she’s worked with far more people than I have, she'd know how to work their energy better than me.”

“Because it’s your role, that’s why.”

“But I- OW!”

Vera pulled the brush back like she might donk Selene on the head again.

“We’ll have none of that negativity, my girl, I taught you better than that. You know negativity before a circle is a no no. Just trust the Gods, trust they have a plan and a reason.”

“Linden won’t like that he was part of whatever plan they supposedly had,” Selene grumbled but stayed still as Vera slapped a flower crown on her head and set to work curling her hair around it.

"Well, it's not like he has a say in it now, is it?"

-x-

“I feel ridiculous,” John complained as Tanzi straightened his tunic, giving him the once over.

“Oh hush, you look gorgeous, she’s gonna shit a brick when she sees you.”

“I swear, if anyone even dares to take a picture I’ll make sure that they never get an internet connection again for the rest of their lives,” John threatened, wincing as Tanzi grabbed a comb and a pair of scissors to start attacking his hair. "Are you sure this is completely necessary?"

"Oh yes, very necessary, you have to dress the part, besides, it'll be worth it, you'll thank me later," Tanzi grinned admiring her handiwork. "That bitch is gonna send me a gift basket for making you look so good."

"And there's really no one else to do it?"

"No, I already told you. Linden is out of action and it's been years since she's worked with anyone close enough to lead a ritual with them. You're bonded to her, you're basically her familiar, you're the perfect solution. Don't worry, it'll be fine, believe it or not she does know what she's doing, she won't let you mess up."

"I never thought for a moment that she wouldn't be completely capable and in control, she always is. She may seem flighty but-"

"You don't have to tell me," Tanzi interrupted, patting his shoulder. "I've known her since she entered the craft, in fact I think tonight will be quite eye opening for you. You've never seen her in a ritual before, have you?"

John shook his head.

"Then you're in for a treat, she's a natural performer as well as a talented witch."

"My wife with a penchant for dramatic performance? Never."

Tanzi sniggered under her breath but declined to comment, focusing her attention on the back of his head as she worked.

"Are you sure this is all I have to do?" John asked, unfolding the instructions he'd been given and reading them through again. They seemed simple enough, follow Selene, stand where he was told, do as she directed and only speak when she spoke to him first or asked him a question, it sounded like a standard social event to him.

"Yep. You've got your part of the performance there too, just make sure you give Sel her part."

"Tell me again why we aren't warning her about this?"

"Because I want to see the look on her face," Tanzi shrugged. "I'm old, I have to get my kicks somewhere."

John snorted out a laugh. "Don't let my Grandma hear you complaining about being old, she gets very defensive when anyone under sixty even dares to mention they have a wrinkle."

"Good job I'm over 60 then," Tanzi answered distractedly, tugging at the side of his head as she tried to wrestle his hair into submission. He resisted the urge to flinch and instead focused on her words.

"Sure you are, and I'm planning a career change to become a game show host." The woman didn't look any older than he did, let alone old enough to appease his Grandma.

Tanzi grinned evilly. "Look me up if you don't believe me, but sit still while you do it."

For want of anything better to do John pulled out his phone and did as he was told. It took him less than two minutes and a tiny bit of government file delving to find the truth.

"There's only one Tanzanite Summerland, who is apparently seventy-eight years old."

Tanzi hummed a little sound of acknowledgement as she worked on his parting, trying to force his hair to lay in a way that didn't come naturally to it. "Why won't your bloody hair stay where I put it?"

"Selene asks the same thing, I gave up trying to change it years ago and just work with it, but don't think I don't know you're trying to change the subject," he retorted, on to her game.

She huffed, giving up on the parting, deciding to work with what she had, smoothing it back into place instead. "I'm mated to a full bloodied Shifter, Nikos is 297."

"He's what?" John spluttered, turning to look at her. "That's impossible."

"Dude, you turn into a cat, nothing should be impossible to you," she drawled, her tone implying she thought he was being particularly dense as she grabbed his head and turned it to face forward. "Avery is 413."

"Avery too? What does he turn into?"

"Nothing, though I'm sure he'd love to embrace the bat cliché if he could."

"Bat? Why would h-"

Tanzi raised her curved fingers to her mouth in a crude depiction of fangs and hissed.

John's eyes widened.

Tanzi nodded. "Yeah, and he's still not matured into a fully functioning adult, he'd be lost without my sister, I swear. Now, you've got your words, I've done the best I can with your hair, I think you're good to go."

"What? No! I've got questions, you can't just dump this kind of information on me and expect me to just accept it. I need answers."

"No time my friend, chop chop, it's getting dark, move your arse, your wife's waiting."

-x-

"Seriously?"

Selene couldn't have been more shocked if Tanzi had produced a monkey from her pocket to slap her around the face.

"You think John is the solution to our problem? How? Why? He hates people!"

"Oh hush," Tanzi soothed, brushing away her concerns. "He'll be fine, it's only a little ritual-"

"Little? There's a hundred and fifty people out there joining in!"

"In at the deep end," Tanzi shrugged, "he married a witch, he's gotta learn sometime. He said he'd do it."

"But why him? Is there really no one else?" Selene fretted, more worried about her husband's social anxiety than the ritual itself. "Can't you do it?"

"Nope, you're our poster child, you're the one they came to see, we can't let them down. He's the only person here with a connection to you that won't dull your energy. You know a Priest is supposed to enhance it, not drain it."

Selene wanted to argue, but her friend did make a good point, not that she wanted to admit it. She had worked with John in little ways before, working on his intuition and raising his personal power quicker and easier before each shift he attempted; it really wouldn’t be that much different for him, you know, apart from all the people staring at him.

“Fuck it, we’ll make it work,” Selene huffed. “Did you at least prepare him, even a little? Gods, he’s never going to leave my side again after this. I walked away for an hour and he was drafted.”

“Of course I prepared him, I gave him a script and everything,” Tanzi promised her, crossing her heart.

“Which script?” Selene asked suspiciously.

“This one,” Tanzi grinned, handing Selene a book of Shadows already opened on a page.

Selene quickly scanned through the pages, recognising the revised ritual instantly.

“I’m going to make a few adjustments,” she stated in a tone that allowed no arguments.

“Wouldn’t expect anything less,” Tanzi assured her, knowing that she had won that round.

“Fine,” Selene sighed, checking the time. “Then I guess I'm ready.”

“Good, let’s go,” Tanzi said, draping a cloak around Selene’s shoulders.

“Hang on, where’s my chapstick?”

“Do you really need it?” Tanzi asked, desperate to get the other woman moving.

“Yes, I do, especially as I have a lot of foreheads to kiss out there,” Selene answered, already scrabbling through her bag looking for the elusive little tube.

“Where the hell is the bloody...Oh, thanks, babe,” she said in response to the chapstick that appeared in her line of sight, recognising the ring on the hand that held it. She took the stick and slicked on a generous amount, making fish out of water noises at her reflection in the mirror before turning around. She stumbled, reaching blindly behind her for something to hold on to, because praise be to every single deity for the God that was her husband.

“Holy shitballs Batman!”

“See, I look stupid!” John huffed, his cheeks burning. He should never have let himself be talked into it.

“Rubbish,” Tanzi scoffed.

“Wow,” Selene breathed, seemingly unable to form any full sentences.

“Told you she’d like it,” Tanzi grinned.

“What...I mean...how the...my Gods,” she breathed, unable to tear her eyes away from the pure gorgeousness she was seeing. Her eyes kept darting to a new part of him, there was simply too much beauty to take in in one go. “Wow.”

“Yes, I am a miracle worker, I know this,” Tanzi preened, brushing a non-existent speck of dirt off his shoulder.

“Is that a wig?”

“Clip in extensions.”

“My Gods,” Selene whispered again. John’s hair was now brushing his shoulders, falling in shimmering red waves that perfectly matched his own colour. His usual side parting had been maintained, the extensions having obviously been trimmed to blend in with his forelock, which somehow made it look less alien on him. Her fingers itched to run through all that silky looking hair and she actually reached out a hand but Tanzi slapped it down.

He was dressed in a black shirt with loose fitted sleeves that laced up across his chest under a dark forest green tunic. His legs were encased in black leggings and dark brown lace up boots that came up to just below his knees. He had a black cloak over one arm and a metal headpiece that encircled his head looking rather like a crown. But it was the pointed ears that peeked out from his hair that really pulled the whole look together.

“Fuck...me,” Selene was absolutely stunned, taking a few steps towards him, wanting to be close, to touch, to kiss...

“Later,” Tanzi ordered. “You two have to get moving, I can hear the drums already.”

Snapping out of her dazzling husband induced daze, Selene grabbed a sword that had been laying on a table in one hand and reached for his hand with the other.

If John felt nervous dressed in his ridiculous costume, it was nothing compared to how Selene seemed to be feeling. He could feel her hand shaking in his and hear the way she kept sucking in a deep breath before letting it out slowly.

He wanted to say something to make it better, but knew that in times like these words made very little difference to her. Instead he repositioned her hand in his, linking their fingers and giving it a comforting squeeze. She looked different tonight, he’d seen her in ritual robes before, but this time she had replaced the dramatic makeup she had been wearing earlier with something much more subtle. She looked younger, less sure of herself, with pale golden eyeshadow, pink blushed cheeks and no lipstick, maybe that was part of the reason that she looked a little less confident than normal.

They waited just outside the perimeter that had been marked out for the circle, around which a ring of people stood, others seated in little huddles on blankets, obviously not part of the actual ritual but wishing to observe. The whole clearing was lit up by the crackling flames of a large bonfire, which warmed the chill air to a more pleasant temperature now that the sun had gone down, taking its heat with it.

The drumming that had been growing louder with each passing moment reached its crescendo and abruptly stopped. He felt her stiffen and heard her inhale deeply once more, holding it for the count of five before letting it out slowly.

“Show time,” she whispered, more to herself than to him. “Just follow my lead, babe, I won’t let you down.”

“I know,” he assured her, bringing her hand to his lips and placing a gentle kiss on her knuckles.

Link to Ao3

[infinitegalahad]

Borhap Boys As Sugar Daddies

(reposted bc it was disappearing from the tags😭)

hey guys!! I wanna apolgoize for the disappearance, school is ✨madness✨ luv. so I've decided to try something new. But I promise I'm working on requests (and a bunch of new ideas). I love all of the borhap boys (bc they are babies🥺) so this might become a little series of head canons! no major warnings, just lots of fluff and some suggestive material. also reader is gender neutral (boy, girl, whatever you what it my dudes!) why not mix my fav trope and boys all in...one fic😳😳 anyways hope you guys enjoy!! I would love some feedback for future reference

Masterlist (requests are welcomed!)

Rami Malek-

Number one that gif of him...need I say more? 🥰

I’m sick of how ya’ll sleep on Rami!! I’m gonna give him tons of love

He would be one of the most affectionate sugar daddy’s tbh

Certainly would spoil the HECK out of you

Whether it be paying off your bills or lavish trips to Greece, Rami always has your back

You never had to pay a SINGLE PENNY when you were around him

Being with Rami, you were a changed person

Your fashion game went UPPPP

Like chanel perfume, all designer clothes, nice handbags, you NAME IT

”Rami, I’m not buying a five hundred dollar shirt from Theory.” ”What do you mean? It would look so good on you, sweetheart.”

Yes, Rami bought you the shirt

You two were at a vinyl place and you saw a limited edition queen vinyl

He buys it (and basically 10+ vinyls you love)

SO RAMI MAKES A WHOLE ASS ROOM IN HIS HOME FOR YOUR VINYLS🥺🥺

This man is omfg i loveee him❣️

Little sneak kisses to your forehead

Seeing you smile as you shop and blush at his complaints makes him so freaking happy HE LOVES YOU SO MUCH

He would take you shopping at the best stores

“I would be fine at a target, y’know” as you look around a Gucci store

Rami would snake an arm around your waist as he cooed into your ear, “My baby deserves the best, and nothing but the best

What started out as an arrangement turned into a genuine relationship

When looking for a sugarbaby, Rami was simply looking for company (and someone to spoil the heck out of)

In all truth, he was simply a lonely guy who simply wanted someone to make happy, and made himself happy in the process

Wherever you guys would go, he would always wanna hold your hand and be close to you bc he’s scared of loosing someone he’s made a connection with

And i’m totally not crying as I write this

Both of you were in dark places when you first met

Rami showed how much he truly cared about you

If you called him all upset, he would SPEED over with whatever you needed whether it be pizza or emotional support

Sitting on your couch, his arm wrapped around yours as you vented about your problems

Rami had convinced you to drop your job and come live with him because he’s a KING!!

”Angel, you’re not gonna have to worry about anymore.” ”What do you mean?”

You ended up quitting your job and moving in with him

What turned into an arrangement became an intimate relationship

The sex between you to was AMAZING

it was VERY intimate

It started off slow but would get increasingly rougher god I hate what I said

Rami would always check up and you and NEVER go past your limits

It would end with the two of you cuddling in bed

Let’s just say you never had to worry about your bills ever again😎😎

I MADE MYSELF CRY WHYYY

Gwilym Lee-

my love for this man? ENDLESS

Seriosuly gwilym lee HAVE MY CHILDERN

anyways to the pLOT

Gwilym is the sexiest and cutest man alive

The sugar daddy that will bring you EVERYWHERE HE GOES

He’s such a gentlemen

Like all relationships start, it was more of an arrangement then a relationship

Your job was to escort Gwilym at all these events as “company”

Gwilym would send a bunch of nice items and a driver to bring you to the location

”Hope you like this ❤️ xxx”   “Treat yourself! 😘xxx”

Like mister I-😳😳

Gwilym is literally such a sweet person

Whenever you were spotted with him, you would get thousands of compliemnts/questions

”You’re with Gwilym! So lucky!”

”That necklace is to kill for! Did Gwilym give it to you?”

”Teach my your ways!”

Whenever you’re at these events all these people give you evil stares

Your like👁👄👁 “is Gwilym a playboy??”

Gwilym is all like “what do you mean?? 🥺Of course not! Your the only one that matters to me right now”

He’s such a king we LOVE HIM

Spontaneous trips to France and Italy

Gwilym and you grow super close

Also your dates would range from fancy galas for Gwilym’s works or peaceful book/poetry readings

He LOVES books and always takes you to bookstores and gives his best recommendations

He literally turns into an english teacher while overanalyzing books

”The greenlight in Green Gatbsy is such a crucial symbol”

”Jane Austen is one of the best feminist writers, she was so ahead of her time!”

You wanna be annoyed but can’t

i can’t I LOVE GWILYM LEE I’M NOT SORRY

The two of you would lie in bed together

You would be slouched against his body as he stroked your hair, reading to you in that accent

As much as you love your gentlemen, you get him into the wacky world of ninety day fiance

”This looks like trash...I’m going to watch every minute of it!”

You guys order chinese food and watch this obsessviely for six hours

I know this is meant to be fluffy but why not add some 🌶

Sex with you and Gwil is like ✨fireworks✨

He would make sure you wouldn’t be able to walk the next day let’s just say😉

He would have to carry you around and kiss your head, saying “You're so adorable, poppet” or “Don’t strain your legs, Cariad!”

Also ceo of AMAZING NICKNAMES

”My anwylyd” (Welsh for dearest)

Would 100% write you romantic poems (over text and in paper)

And yes he WOULD dramatically read them to you😤😤✌🏽

He would always greet you with the most over the top nicknames like “Good morning cariad!” or “Sit there and act pretty, my beloved”

hi mr lee please make me your sugar baby

Gwilym is your sugar daddy but also your sweet, book loving man

He loves seeing you happy so in return, you make him happy💓💓

Joe Mazzello-

This one is a wildcard ladies and gays!! 😌😌

Joe definitely does not strike you as a sugar daddy

He seems more like your boyfriend than anything else

The two of you were inseparable

After dinner Joe would take you to a karaoke bar or for ice cream

After the first date you started calling him Joey

Drunken duets to cheesy 80’s romance songs

The two of you would sing your hearts out before vomiting from the copious ammouts of ice cream and vodka

With Joe it’s eithier mcdonalds or Nobu in TriBeCa

Mr.Mazello has range😌✨

This dude is the ceo of cheesy nicknames

”Yes my little lover muffin!”

”What is it cutie patootie?”

”You look amazing buttercup!”

“What’s up, hot stuff?”

In public he calls you “baby” or “lover” dw he saves you from public embarrassment 

You know that meme of will smith and his wife? That is basically you and Joe

My love for his man is infinite

Joe is super clingy

Hand holding and lots of PDA

He wants people to know that your his sugar baby😤😤💓

he will always send texts like

”miss you baby💓💗💓💗!”

”can you grab milk from the store pls??”

”SUGAR HONEY ICED TEA WHERE ARE YOU😩😩🤯🤯🤯”

”Joe, it’s been a day.”

He has so many photos of you in his camera roll

You are his lockscreen😔💓

The ceo’s of amazing instagram photos, whether it be you wearing a burger king crown at Burger King or You guys kissing on a boat with the Italian sunset on a private boat

Captions would be could “my favorite fairytale is our love story” or “yasss queen slay it!”

It’s cringey but god Joe is so adorable

A combination of a child and gentleman ALL IN ONE

All of his friends are like “you guys HAVE to be dating!’

It’s suppose to be nothing more than an arrangement right?

I mean the two of you were living with eachother and he dropped all of this other sugar babies for you

The two of you are master chefs minus the one time Joe burned mac and cheese and set the stove on fire

Also not to get smutty but the sex between you two? Like

Straight up RAMMING to sweet pillowtalk

Anyways Joe being your sugar daddy would definitely not be a bad thing at all😘

Always exchange those “I love you’s” 💕✨

Ben Hardy-

When first seeing Ben on your sugar daddy app, you were 100% intimidated

But upon meeting him, this tough dude was a PUPPY🥺❣️

On the first date he bought you flowers and gave you a hug

“Y/n, right?”

“That’s me!”

“I just wanted to say you look stunning, love.”

You were wearing jeans and literally smiled so much

You know this date was going to go VERY WELL NOW😩✌🏽✨

Instead of a fancy restaurant, Ben took you to a stroll around London

Whatever clothes you wanted? He got it

Whatever cafe you wanted to stop at? Buy all the tea/coffee and pastries you want

Hotel? Trivago

The two of you walked around the city, hand and hand as you got to know eachother

You ended up walking around the city for five hours up until midnight

You laughed and talked about thousands of things

In confusion, you had to see Ben again

As Ben walked you back to your place, you smiled at him,

”I’d like to do that again.”

”Call me when you want, y/n.”

So your “dates” became more frequent

Ben had the best ideas for dates

Dinners at small Italian places, walking around a museum, or just sitting in his place and watching mindless television

He made sure to spoil you

With gifts, literally and figurreitly

Sex was a large piece in your arrangeemnt

But it was not the only thing in your relationship

And it was!! Amazing!!

”You’re so fucking beautiful” as he would kiss your forehead and dive straight into it 🥺😳

Not only could that man be A BEAST but an absolute sweetheart

Everyday you looked forward to not only getting paid by him, but just talking to him for hours on end

He would stay up for hours just to talk to you, whether it be about your lives or anything

and that ladies and gays is a dedicated MAN

No matter what, Ben always found a way to touch you

He always had his hand on the chair behind you or your thigh

You guys would have pillowforts and nerf fun battles together

It would always end with a cuddle session

Frankie would be skeptcial but love you!!

You guys got so close that he took you on a trip to the greek islands AND PROPOSED!! LIKE!! YES!!😌😌😌

LIKE YES POP OFF MISTER BEN HARDY

[poge-life]

can you do an imagine where Drew and the reader always flirt because they share lots of scenes together on OBX, one day he snaps when he sees austin and the reader close. he makes her his when they leave to go back to his place

italics= filming

Anyone who had eyes could see that you and Drew had a thing for each other. You got casted as Toppers older sister, which meant you were always spending time with Drew, Austin, and Dion. But you were always closer to Drew, considering you spent the most time with him. 

You two were always flirting with each other. But you never acted on anything, not wanting to mess up your friendship. You guys were getting ready to film ‘midsummers’ and you were matching with Drew. You both had yet to see each other, due to the fact everyone wanted to keep you apart until the last minute so the reaction on camera was genuine.

You and Madelyn were up in ‘Sarah’s room’ getting changed with the help of the hair and makeup people. You were dressed in a off the shoulder, light blue ball gown with white flowers on the top layer. Your hair was curled and pinned to one side of your head with a blue and white flower crown placed on top. 

The makeup department had placed light body glitter on your chest and shoulders, careful of your dress. You stood in front of the mirror, smoothing out the front of your dress as Madelyn came up behind you. 

“Holy fuck. You look so hot.” She laughed, wrapping her arms around you, as you let out a giggle, grabbing both of her hands in yours. 

“Look at you! Whatta babe!” You winked as she shook her head at you.

“Drew is gonna go insane when he see’s you!” Madelyn spoke, turning you to face her, as you looked down, “Really?”

“Of course! You both are so oblivious to each others feelings! Drew would be insane to not make a move on you. If he doesn’t, I will.”

“Rolling in 5!”

“C’mon let’s go!”

You and Madelyn both took your place at the top of the stairs and waited for Jonas to call action.

“And rolling!”

“Girls! It’s time to go!” ‘Ward’ called up the stairs as you and Madelyn walked into frame. Madelyn went to move down the stairs but you grabbed her hand, “What if he doesn’t like it?”

You weren’t really sure if you were still in character or talking about Drew at this point.

“Hey. Rafe has been in love with you for years. He’ll love it and if he doesn’t, then screw him. You look absolutely hot and you don’t need Rafe to tell you that.” She gave your hand a squeeze, leading both of you down the stairs. 

Drew had his back to both of you while Austin was facing the stairs, like the script had said. Austin had hit Drew on the arm as the two of you came down the stairs, causing him to turn and face you. His mouth dropped at the sight of you and you felt a smile make its way across your face as you stopped in front of him.

Madelyn walked over to Austin and gave you a nudge and a smile, and you waved your hand at her, not breaking eye contact with Drew.

“You look...wow.”He smiled

“You look very handsome Mr Cameron.” You smiled, fixing his bow tie, placing your hands on his chest.

You had to bite your lip to keep from giggling as Drew looked down at you with a little smile on his face. 

“Avery! I want a picture of you and Rafe. It’s the only time we’ll get to see him smile.” Ward spoke and you rolled your eyes as Drew clenched his jaw in ‘anger’ at his ‘fathers’ words and you grabbed his hand, leading him over to where his parents were.

You stood next to Drew, one hand on his chest and the other around his back while Drew placed his hand on your ass, causing you to blush

‘That definitely wasn’t in the script.’

You looked up at Drew, who just had a smirk on his face and you shook your head, looking back over at Madelyn and Austin who sent you both knowing looks and you just smiled at them.

“Aw, Rafe. You don’t look like a douche for once.” Madelyn spoke and Drew went to take a step forward but you placed your hand on his chest and grabbed his hand, pulling him back into you, “Rafe. Don’t.”

“Sarah. Knock it off.”  Charles spoke, turning to look at Madelyn and Austin

“And scene!”

You and Madelyn let out a giggle as you both looked over at each other as Drew and Austin shared a look of confusion at the two of you.

“Alright. We’re gonna go shoot some scenes with Chase and Rudy. So, it’ll be like 45 minutes? Maybe an hour? Please don’t dirty up the outfits.”Jonas spoke, walking towards you guys, sending you and Madelyn a look as you two were notorious for getting your clothes dirty a lot.

“Damn, Starkey. You clean up nice. Like, wow.” You smirked, placing a hand on his chest. Drew sent you a smirk, wrapping his arm around your waist, pulling you into him. You stumbled a little in your heels but sent him a smile as you looked up at him.

“Can you guys just fuck already?” Madelyn called, holding her phone up to face the two of you.

You blushed and pushed yourself away from Drew, walking over to Austin, dragging him over to that patio that was attached to the house.

“I’m gonna explode if I have to stand next to Drew in that tux. Jesus.” You huffed, plopping down on the chair, sitting in a position that your mother would deem un-lady like. Austin let out a laugh, sitting on the arm of the chair.

“Why don’t you both just admit you have feelings for each other? It’ll be a relief for all of us if you guys admit you like each other and fuck.” Austin shrugged. You snapped your head to look at him and he sent you a wink.

What you both didn’t see was Drew standing off to the side, watching you both with a frown on his face.

-------

Safe to say, the rest of filming went bad. Drew would barely talk to you and was hostile towards you the rest of the time. As soon as you two were done with your scenes, he would walk away from you and go hang out with someone else.

It kind of hurt. Hell, it hurt a lot. Drew never acted like this towards anyone. Let alone you. You had no idea what you did to make him act like that to you. Walking back to your trailer, heels in hand. You were pulling the bobby pins out of hair, wincing every time one got stuck. Bumping into a hard object, you stumbled on your feet. Looking up, you saw Drew and went to say something but he walked away before you could.

“Okay. Why the hell are you being such an asshole? What did I do?!” You exclaimed, throwing your hands up in the air as you turned to face him. Drew stopped in his tracks, turning slightly to face you, “Don’t you have to be with Austin?”

You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion, giving him a look, “Austin? What does he have to do with anything?”

Drew shook his head, turning to face you, “You two seemed pretty cozy earlier. Despite the fact you were flirting with me not even two minutes before that.”

“Jesus christ, Drew,” You mumbled, “I walked away with Austin because I would have jumped your bones right then and there if I stood by you any longer.”

Drew felt his face heat up in embarrassment at your confession, rubbing the back of his neck, “Now I feel like a dick.”

“Oh yeah. Now you do.” You spoke in a sarcastic voice, rolling your eyes at him.

“Any chance you’d let me take you out to dinner to make up for it?” He asked hopefully.

“Are you asking me out on a date, Starkey?” You smiled, taking a few steps towards him as he stepped towards you, “And if I am?”

Dropping your heels, you wrapped your arms around his neck, as he wrapped his around your waist, “I’d say, you got yourself a date.”

Drew smiled down at you before leaning down to press your lips together.

[hargrove-mayfields]

Harringrove April Day 7- Daisychain

Pluck, twist, pluck, twist, pluck, twist.

When he’s upset, Billy has a bad habit of getting himself caught in a rut, repeating the same action over and over again until he’s even more worked up.

Most of the time it’s chain smoking, lighting up one cigarette after another until his chest burns and he’s angrier than when he started, but right now, he had to resort to something else.

Susan was hosting some get-together in their backyard, and Billy had been told explicitly, don’t do anything that could embarrass the family and don’t try to stay inside and get out of it either, so even though he didn’t want a damned thing to do with the bullshit happy family routine, and especially not for Susan’s wine mom group, he knew better than to try anything.

There was a shady spot near the edge of their property where he went to brood, not out of sight of the little party but far enough away he finally had some room to breathe.

Finally away from the people, he started feeling jittery, just itching for something to do with his hands, so he plucked a mayweed, stuck his thumb under the flower to pop it off, and put the bitter stem between his teeth.

Max must’ve been feeling the same pressure to socialize, because she had come over and sat down beside him in the grass not too long after.

When Billy pulled up another daisy, she had scoffed, “You don’t have to kill them, you know.”

“Shut up, shitbird.” He flicked the head of the flower at her this time, smiling fakely when she rolled her eyes.

“God, if you have to ruin them you could at least like, make a chain or something.”

It was Billy’s turn to scoff at her, “Really, Max? Do I look like the type to braid delicate little flowers together?”

“No.” She remarked sarcastically, picking up the flower he broke, “But you do look like the type who’s going to find all these petals in your hair if you don’t quit killing my daisies for no reason.”

“If I make a stupid daisy chain, you’re wearing it.” He threatened, but nature is Max’s thing, and she had sat up straighter, a smile on her face, “Deal.”

So now it was pluck, twist, pluck, twist, pluck, twist, until he had a whole nother chain finished for Max. He ties it off and sits it atop her head, but his hands still need something to do or he’s going to tear his hair out as he slips into that same old routine of repetition.

His knuckles are locked from how aggressively he was braiding them by the time he finishes a second one, but he’s still got tons of energy to burn and no cigarettes to smoke, so it’s pluck, twist, pluck, twist, pluck, twist, again and again.

There are eight crowns in total before Billy decides his fingers are going to break if he keeps going, and he decides he’s sacrificed enough flowers. Max tries to stack them all on her head, giggling when the tower of flower crowns tips over, and then they have to decide what to do with them.

Max keeps two, one for herself and her friend El, and gives one to each of the women Susan invited over, getting a smile and a pat on the head from each one. She returns to Billy with one daisy chain left, and puts it on his head.

He shakes it back off immediately, sends a pointed glance towards Neil sitting in a lawn chair, drinking his fourth beer at two in the afternoon, “Gonna have to give this one away too.”

“Well don’t you have somebody special you can give it to?”

The answer is yes, absolutely he does, but he doesn’t know how appropriate it is, showing up at his boyfriend's house with flowers he picked out of his own backyard like he’s in some kind of puppy love.

So for now he just shrugs his shoulders, a noncommittal response to Max’s question, but really, he can’t stop thinking about it, delicate white and yellow flowers in chestnut brown hair.

He was supposed to go see Steve after this stupid social was over anyways, maybe he’d take it to him then. Yeah, that would work.

Except once the party’s over and he gets his drunken confirmation from Neil that he’s free to go, Billy’s just sitting in his car outside of Steve’s with the daisy chain hanging from his mirror, debating on whether to give it to him or not.

Because he wasn’t supposed to be that kind of queer or Neil Hargrove would’ve sniffed him out a thousand times by now. He was masculine, tough, not at all the type to bring his boyfriend fucking daisies.

So it stays in the car, but the whole time they’re together, he’s still thinking about it, likening soft porcelain skin to white flower petals, lean limbs to sturdy stems, until he decides he’s just got to see that pretty face framed by spring blooms.

Right before he leaves, he grabs it out of the car, holds it behind his back, “Got you something, pretty boy.”

He steps back onto Steve’s stoop and crowns his King, placing the circle of mayweed on top of his head, making Steve blush, just the lightest dusting of pink on his cheeks as he declares, “Oh, I love daisies! Our lawn boy always puts weed killer on all of our flowers, says it makes the yard look nicer, so I never get to see any.”

Then he kisses Billy on the cheek, gentle and soft, and tells him, “Thank you, Billy.” and closes the front door. In that moment, standing on his boyfriend’s stoop at midnight, having brought him flowers and got the sweetest display of affection in return, Billy felt like he was in one of those sad-sap love stories like Susan watched.

And maybe it’s a little much, but now how is Billy supposed to just show up at Steve’s door without one of the wild daisies that grows out back, since they have so many? Especially when each and every time Steve does the exact same thing, kisses him on the cheek and puts them in a little vase on the table.

It doesn’t take long until he’s picked the yard almost barren of any wild daisies just to see that sweet smile on Steve’s face again.

Now the only thing that could ruin this for him would be- “William Reuben Hargrove, what did you do to all of my daisies?”- if Max found out he’d picked her flowers.

It was so worth it.

[trashbinbackyard]

jack/mirad & kai/helvi

I woke up at 8 and went like eeeh i can sleep another half an hour and them boom, 1pm

1. Who's the one who's reckless and always getting into trouble while the other gotta pull em out

Mirad has grown past his most reckless tendencies, Jack however hasn't, but he's more at danger to himself than to others

Kai is very careful when he's out hunting and he's never alone. Helvi however has a habit of going into the woods alone

2. Who's the one to send the other "I love my gf/bf" memes

I don't feel like either?

If they had phones it'd be Helvi

4. Which one spoils the other more and do they ever get competitive to show the other more love

Mirad spoils Jack, lets be real, it doesn't turn into a competition bc it's in moderation, and mostly Mirad treating Jack to some of his skincare products

Kai miiiiight spoil Helvi juuuuust a bit, he doesn't mind getting up way earlier to fix her breakfast and help her tie her hair and acquiring many fur blankets

5. How many years did it take to get married or was it just not for them

A few years for sure, when they both were sure about it. Probably talked about it too before Mirad proposed

Few years, if wasn't for Kai's role in the village they would've gotten married later, as neither really saw marriage as That important and just something they one day would like to do.

6. What was their wedding like

Small, just closest family and couple friends, nothing extravagant for the middle aged men

Whole day event basically with everyone from the village and surrounding area invited (against Kai's best wishes), Weddings, and especially high profile weddings like that are few and far between and they're quite the event. Small ceremony but then a huge feast with dancing singing and general revelry

7. Is their friends/family supportive

Ellen is very happy for them both, Mirad's parents were wary but approve later on, Marda is still sus about Jack

Very much so, Kory pretty much pushed them to get married already, Kat when she finds out is very happy for them both. Helvi's parents are so proud and treat Kai like close family

8. How does one comfort the other when the other is in distress/having a panic attack/crying

Mirad talks to Jack gently, checks if he hasn't hurt himself, bring him a snack and drink. When Mirad's distressed Jack will ask if he can do anything and keep him company if he lets him

If Kai's in distress he tends to shut down and all Helvi can really do is keep him company and hold him. If Helvi's upset Kai will call a timeout and just go somewhere with her where she can calm down and talk things through

9. Which one dissociates

Jack mostly

-

10. Which one stares at the other's booty like "damn" and how does the other react when catching them

Both. Mirad would be more cheeky (hehe) in his reaction while Jack is like "my booty?? :0"

Helvi. Kai blushes

11. When they live together what kinda place do they live in? What does their home look like?

Both had their separate places, where Mirad's was very neat and organized and Jack's was a whole mess. Jack would still keep his place as a workshop while he pretty much now lives with Mirad, where he learns to respect the house rules

They share a two-story chief's house with Kory and a garm, they have the whole lower level to themselves pretty much, and it's quite big, it's very cozy and bit cabin'y even if it's larger

13. How does each act when getting drunk

Jack's a sad drunk, first thing Mirad knew about him tbh. Mirad doesn't drink if I remember correct

Neither of them want to get Drunk drunk, just tipsy. Kai loosens up and gets chattier. Helvi gets giggly and cuddly

14. Which one rolls over in the morning to wake up the other one just to give kiss them

Beware the morning breath. Mirad wakes up before Jack

Kai doesn't wake Helvi up when he leaves the bed to go prepare breakfast, but when that's done he will kiss her goodmorning

16. Does one have an interest the other think is weird but wants to listen to it regardless

Jack likes welding for fun too, he's made some little "art" pieces for Mirad with textures he knows he likes, and Mirad appreciates it. Mirad's big into working out and Jack will be out of breath in two minutes if he joins but it's a pleasant experience

Helvi loves making potions and instruments and while Kai knows little about either he's up for helping her if she asks, she also sings. I know this seems kinda random bc I just know thought of it, but Kai's into drawing with charcoals, it would be fitting for his "quiet kid with not many friends" character (it hits a little too close home lmao)

17. Which one uses cropped hentai as reaction images

That's very much up Jack's alley

If they had phones, Helvi

18. Does one of them kinkshame the other

Not kinkshame, more like kink-concern on Mirad's part like "Jack, honey, WHY do you wanna be choked that hard"

Neither of them have really out there kinks, though Helvi would be up to do it in the woods. Just have to be extra careful they're far enough from any civilization

19. Is one of them self conscious about their body? If so how does the other comfort them

Jack, he's pudgy and wrinkly. Mirad doesn't mind it one bit and calling Jack a sexy beast on the regular makes Jack happy and less ashamed of his body

Helvi used to, before trans-your-gender spell hit, (and bc she basically got to decide what her body would look like of course she has no regrets) Kai is very body-neutral about himself, yeah that's a body, nothing special but ain't nothing wrong with it either

21. What is their song? Like the song that gives them overwhelming feelings?

Well I have listed Silent storm for them once and you know what, I stand by it

From Heilung Traust and Krigsgaldr (first half of it anyway), both were big inspirations for Helvi's character in general and Maria Franz is her voiceclaim too lol (also the guy on krigsgaldr second verse for Kai's voiceclaim (before 4.40 mark))

28. Are either of them mentally ill, if so how do they help one another cope

Jack is a recovering addict, also depressed, and alcoholic (recovering when they get together). Mirad is also an ex-addict and while he's much further into his recovery he's not immune to the shitty stuff that still might happen, they're each other's peer support

Helvi used to have bad dysphoria

29. Does one have a spot on them where they would melt when the other kisses them there

Head, forehead for Jack (and lips of course) he's not that big into getting kisses on his body. Mirad is sensitive everwhere but IIRC neck and sides are big

Helvi's wrists and neck just below her ears. Kai's throat and forehead

30. Do they dance together

Mirad poledances, Jack enjoys the view

At their wedding sure, both lil tipsy and letting loose, both lost their flower crowns that evening

31. Do they sing together

More like hum if they feel like it

Helvi's the one signing, Kai might join in on a verse or two

34. Are they a reckless couple or safe

Pretty safe with the occasional reckless on Jack's part

Safe

35. What be their kinks and do they try each other's kinks

Love and Care, and choking

They're pretty vanilla

37. Do they get into fights often? If so what do they fight over and how do they make up?

Arguments sure about Jack's self-destructive behaviors sometimes but the rule is never go to sleep angry so they both reflect on it with compassion

Not really, at least before The Incident, apologize and kiss and make up

38. Which one's top, bottom, verse

Mirad's a top, Jack is a pillow princess vers

Kai's top, Helvi's bottom

39. What kinda sex they be having (gentle rough whatever)

Whatever they're in the mood for, some tender lovin'? Sure! Get hot and heavy? With moderation. Break into laughter in the middle of it? Silly is also a mood!

It starts off as hot and heavy but calms down to more gentle

40. Who would fight in honor for the other if someone would insult them

Jack would just hit them with the "don't be meeeaaan 🥺🥺" Mirad I feel like would go the verbal route as well but more stern

It's common knowledge to Not insult the village shaman (the one who has illness remedies and the one who blesses you before you travel), and you DONT insult the the chief's kid/chief. They're both capable of defending themselves but Kai will step in if he happens to hear

44. Do they want kids

Nah, who needs kids when you got nieces

Yeah, and I've finally made up my mind, they're gonna adopt a bunch (and bc you dropped out of the campaign I can tell you how: a village not that near but not that far gets attacked by a power hungry druid and leaves bunch of kids without parents and the party will escort them back to Kai's village, before they go after the druid)