#i’ve dumped all my bedding on the landing so i can lie here and scream for a bit because why. whyyyyyy

[fingertipsmp3]

Someone needs to put me down like a sick dog

[moxfirefly]

So I’ve been working on this for a little while now after a comment @supershiny-raven left on one of my post. I present to you:

How the others find out you and the turtles are dating.

Raphael entered the Lair with you in his arms. His brothers stumbling by him, Leonardo actually tripping.

The gang had gone to drink at Vern’s fancy penthouse, a round of drinks had turned to four and before anybody had common sense he had broken out his fancy wine collection.

That had truly been everyone’s undoing.

Yours as well.

Raphael the tank had pretty much only gotten buzzed, even more so upon seeing your state he figured he needed to somehow get you and everyone else home safe and in one piece.

“Where do we dump Donnie?” April had one of his arms slung over her shoulder while Mikey had his other, they had quickly found out the purple banded terrapin was a fan of wine. “Whatever is flat and comfortable, you think you can manage him and Leo?” Raphael nudged his older brother who had dozed off while resting against the couch.

“Yeah yeah brah, we totally-“ He unceremoniously let his brother fall on the nearest cot, poor April taken along for the ride. “Shit, sorry girly”

Raph shook his head, you groaned stirring awake and tightening your hold on him. Raph was basically carrying you with one arm beneath your rear. Making his way towards his room he gently placed you on his bed and set about the task of removing your shoes. “Hey hey mister, I got a boyfriend” You squinted at the large terrapin at the end of the bed.

“Yeah I heard, lucky guy gets to put ya drunk ass to bed, where’s your makeup bag baby?” He got up when you half hazardously pointed at the dresser.

Pushing yourself up a little on your elbows you watched him gather your face creams and a pack of makeup wipes. He sat back down but next to you and motioned towards his lap. “C’mere, let’s get your face off” You giggled when he manhandled you onto his thigh and took out the wipes. Slowly and in the most excruciatingly loving way Raphael set out to wipe off your makeup. Each stroke removing foundation and eyeshadow, you mumbled something he somehow understood in your inebriated state. “Yeah yeah I got ya kid” With all the careful dexterity he developed over time, he gently removed your eyelashes.

“Somebody has been paying attention” You giggled, feeling the buzz in your body shift into grogginess. Raphael looked inside the bag, adding some cream to your face to hydrate it. He examined his work, a lazy smile as he caressed your face. It felt bizarre he could actually do this, touch a beautiful girl and do something so silly as help them out with their face routine. The two of you had been rather quiet about your relationship, enjoying it all to yourselves.

“Ya were the cutest drunk at that party” He ran his knuckles across your chin, You smiled sleepily lifting up enough to catch his lips in a languid kiss.

The door creaked open and there stood April, her own slightly drunk face breaking out into a sweet smile. The two pairs of eyes that landed on her read ‘get out’ and ‘keep your mouth shut’ slowly April backed up nodding with a giggle.

Then there was a ruckus of what Raphael only assumed was April tripping and Leo drunkly laughing his ass off.

____________

Michelangelo

Oh he was screwed.

So insanely screwed.

How could he misplace something he kept on his person so diligently?

Mikey turned over everything he could in his room, currently he had done just that with the mattress but to no avail.

His phone was missing.

His phone with that very scandalous polaroid you’d taken for him.

Mikey had nearly passed out when you gifted him the picture and to his delight he had stuck the polaroid on the back of his phone in its clear phone case. He kept his phone on him all the time, sure he’d have to be a little sneaky about placing it down but he could manage.

Now though? He was about to have a coronary.

Okay, currently in this disaster there was no trace of it. This meant he’d have to scavenge the living room.

Where his family was.

Mikey swallowed and scurried out with a silent prayer that it would there.

Raphael and Leonardo were currently watching a basketball game. They seemed pretty engrossed and perhaps wouldn’t notice that he was scouring the ends of the earth for his actual girlfriend’s literal boobs. He peaked aglance at the couch, his large brothers had to take up so much space to make it worse.

“What are you looking for?” Came Donnie’s voice from the kitchen. The orange banded turtle froze, he tried giving him a nonchalant shrug. “Just checking how I can give Raph a wedgie ya know” Donnie raised a brow ridge, mug of coffee to his lips.

“I double dare ya numbnuts, the Knicks are down ten points and I’m pissed” Raph grunted as the opposing team landed another shot and Leo sighed exasperated with the outcome. His eldest brother got up thankfully which allowed him to take a look at the that side of the sofa. To his dread but relief there wasn’t anything.

Where the fuck was his phone?!

“Hey snot face, can ya order a pizza?” Raph grumbled as the game seem to worsen, a pizza could fix up his mood. Mikey frozen, mouthing a series of ‘shit shit shit’ as he frantically looked around.

“Oh man that would fix this terrible game, can you order it with extra bacon too?” Leo went straight to the fridge to grab something to drink. “Order some cheesy sticks too will you?” Donnie asked as he poured himself another mug of coffee.

Yes all of this sounded wonderful and his stomach did grumble but

HIS GIRLFRIENDS BOOBS.

Raph had scooted further to grab his own soda from the coffee table and just as he did he saw his phone. Relief washed over him but to his immense dismay and terror, the back of his phone was facing up. Which means the clear case he had was displaying the infamous polaroid he had been gifted.

You had simply asked him one thing.

‘Please don’t let your brothers see my tits’

It all felt slow motion, his eyes going wide, his hand diving to the couch and just as he did, Raph’s quick reflexes kicked in unfortunately and he turned to grab his youngest brothers wrist. “Ya ain’t giving me a wedgie man!!”

Raph’s eyes followed Mikey’s hand and then his eyes bugged out.

“Why are there titties on the sofa?!” Raph made for the phone but only got a face full of pillow cushion. He snatched the phone before it could be grabbed by anybody else. The red banded brute grinned as his brother hugged the phone to his chest. “Advert your gaze you perv!” Mikey all but shrieked.

“I’m not the one walking around with a titty pic as my phone cover” Raph grinned, just to make matters worse Leo and Donnie had gathered.

“Mikey why are you walking around with a random porn pic on your phone cover” Came Donnie’s disapproving tone.

“It’s a polaroid” Was all Raph needed to say.

The silence that fell was brief, then a series of ‘ooh’s’ sounded off and Mikey all but frowned and felt his cheeks heat up.

“No way! That can’t be...” Leo was incredulous. The relationship between Mike and you had remained rather on the down low. It was fun, a little secret away from the world that could stay between the two of you.

“Mikey, are you and y/n a thing?” Donnie asked exactly what the rest wanted to know but Mikey dreaded to answer. He sighed dramatically and tucked his phone into his pocket, shooting Raph a glare as his green eyes followed the motion.

“Listen dudes she made me promise that nobody would see that picture and I’ve already broken that cardinal rule thanks to this jerk face” He frowned at Raph, who in turn rolled his eyes.

“Well maybe keep the picture in your wallet or your room?” Leo sipped his soda with a matter of fact tone.

“Or as a background on your phone cause honestly man” Donnie smiled to himself when Mikey shot him an incredulous look. “Why’d she give you that?” Raph inquired sneakily with a smirk.

“For our three month anniver- AH YOU DICK” Mikey huffed out as Raph began to laugh, it was so easy to trick Mikey when one played their cards right.

____________

Donatello

Investigating could take a toll on anybody, even if by all means you weren’t a detective it still didn’t mean you wouldn’t find yourself researching and investigating crime. It seems to be part of the job description when you befriend four giant crime fighting terrapins.

In away you could help, you did.

Everyone had huddled around the living room, the coffee table littered with pictures, clues and all sorts of pieces of evidence that could possibly lead to the culprit they were trying to catch. You had set down a stack of papers, eyes already screaming for a break. Leo and Casey were at the kitchen talking, Casey had just clocked out and was reporting back what the nights investigations had gathered. Raph and Mikey were checking out the pictures Casey had brought over and Donnie naturally was researching on a laptop he’d placed there.

You had nudged him to come over and join the huddle, and secretly you just wanted him close. The two of you were dating, quietly and unannounced, but in those first few stages of just wanting to be glued to one another it was a little difficult to do said glueing.

On a few occasions with prying eyes preoccupied with their investigating, you had reached over to rub his cheek, his sleepy eyes spoke greatly of how tired he felt. Donnie had been at this already for a while, you’d been there with him along the way.

With a stretch of his arms, Donnie yawned and rolled his neck. The clock on your phone read 3:45am, he was due for a nap at the very least. “Why don’t you lie down, I can keep helping out here” You reached over again and took off his glasses, he smiled tiredly but shook his head. “I’m fine, I can keep going” Despite his entire body language screaming otherwise, Donnie would always soldier on.

By the time another hour passed, people consumed enough Coffee to give themselves an additional pulse (and somebody committed the mistake of giving Mikey said coffee) the investigation had died down. A few walls were hit but a few leads had come from it as well. Everyone was ready to call it a night (or morning).

Casey yawned, twisting his neck to let out a few pops. “Okay who’s staying and who’s coming with me?” By the sounds of April softly snoring against an equally happily snoring Raph, it seemed she would stay. Casey had a few hours of sleep to catch on before heading for his next shift and you had to preoccupy yourself with the same before tackling a night shift at your job. Donnie’s tired eyes expressed how he wanted you to stay over but he knew work was closer to your place.

“I guess I’m carpooling with you” You told Casey, already grabbing your jacket and bag. A quick hug to Leo and Mikey, a bow to a recently awaken Splinter and you were next to Donnie.

He’d been sitting on the kitchen table, arms crossed and looking closer to being k.o’d.

It was the sleep deprivation honestly, on both your behalves.

Because you had spread your arms for a hug and so had he, but your face had met in the middle and before either of your foggy brains could comprehend what was happening you had smooched him.

On the lips.

For about a minute.

Minute and a half honestly.

You both froze, the awake members of the family staring with raised brows. Donnie furrowed his brows, lips pursed in a thin line, you still had your own in a kissing motion.

“Well at least we solved one mystery tonight” Spoke Mikey with a snicker, Leo nudged him.

Donnie sighed by shrugged. “Not exactly how I wanted to announce this so yup, I’m her boyfriend, she’s my girlfriend, please hold all inquires for a later time when I’m actually awake” He pulled you in again for a hug, and another kiss (greedy boy) and instructed Casey to deliver you home safely.

With a blush but albeit happy look on your face you waved everyone off.

___________

Leonardo

Keeping a relationship quiet had never proven to be so difficult. Truthfully it came easier when the circle of people surrounding you was bigger, but a close knit one? Everyone suddenly had the powers of observation up to God level.

But Leo’s ninja skills were God level too and you knew how to keep your trap shut and not sigh like a love struck teenager every second you saw him. So it had gone good, real good for a while. The thrill of maybe sharing an intimate kiss while others we’re around was a sensation you never expected to enjoy. When it was time to leave, Leo would ‘walk you’ home safely and by ‘miracle’ run into a few thugs on his way back.

Because there’s no reason a brisk ten minute walk to your apartment should turn into an hour and a half.

Raph wasn’t buying but cared little to stick his nose into it. Donnie was too busy to bother. Mikey had an idea but decided due to bro code not to voice it.

His father though?

Splinter knows what’s going on because well, he’s Splinter. You live long enough with four giant sons all with their unique personalities and traits, you pick up a thing or two about parenting pretty easily.

And Splinter is a phenomenal parent.

Both Father and Mother to his sons.

So naturally he’s irked that his eldest is sneaking out at odd hours and trying to conceal his return. Because Splinter feels that out of all four, Leo has always been the most open with him. Once Raph hit those pre-pubescent mood swings, Donnie began to teach himself all matter of subjects and Mikey was too busy trying to set a new record of heart attacks to give his father while skateboarding; Leo always remained the same.

Even with all the acolytes Leo has achieved in his ninjutsu training, he still had his hiccups and his father would never spare the opportunity to turn into a teaching moment.

So when Leo had kissed you passionately on his way out of your window, you still in nothing but the skin that he had dedicated a fair amount of time in kissing and bitting. He thought he was being slick, he thought he was going to ninja his way into the Lair, into the showers and straight to his bed.

What he didn’t account for was his father waiting up on him. A mug of hot tea on the kitchen table and hands clasps together in what Leo recognized all to well as ‘Dad Mode’.

He’d been caught with the proverbial hand in the cookie jar. His gear was half hazardously on, mask slipped down around his neck and for Christ sake he was holding a shoe. It was 6:30am and he smelled like a girl, a pretty girl no less. The jig was up, especially when his dad motioned for him to come forth and seat opposite him at the kitchen table.

“Dad I can ex-“ Splinter held up a finger and pushed the mug of tea towards his disheveled eldest son.

“My son, I am not angry” Which was truthful, he wasn’t, in fact he was ecstatic that Leo had found somebody, somebody good and somebody that loved him for he has. Long ago he had accepted the pain that his sons would not find suitable partners and the ache it would come with for them. But here was Leo, nervous and trying to adjust his clothing because he’d been with a woman, a woman he clearly loved.

“I like y/n, she is kind, thoughtful and caring to us” Splinter emphasized each trait with a tap of a long nail on the table. “She should be treated with respect, I hope I have instilled that teaching unto you, a lady is to be respected Leonardo” Leo nodded at his fathers words, he nodded and prayed that the underwear he had stuffed into his pockets wouldn’t magically transport on the table to further humiliate him.

“So please my son, do not lie to me, do not come home late in this state and not expect me to know what has transpired” Dad voice was on, coupled with the sympathetic eyes though, man Splinter was good at this shit.

Leo hung his head, clearly ashamed of his dishonorable doings. “Hai, sensei” Even as an adult being scolded by his father never stopped hurting.

“And please do tell her that there isn’t anything hide, she is welcomed in our home, I would not mind getting to know my future daughter in law a little bit more” Splinter enjoyed the way his son nearly choked on his tea.

“Perhaps I can tell her a few anecdotes of your growing up” He smiled when Leo looked at him with pleading eyes. “I believe I have a few embarrassing ones she will find most delightful” He stood up and placed a hand on his sons broad shoulder. “I’m sorry dad, sorry for sneaking around and not telling you” He was earnest in his words and Splinter bowed his head.

“I know, thank you Leonardo” He walked away, hands behind his back.

Leo sighed and pulled out his phone, shooting you a quick text.

-so my dad wants to formally meet you... as in introduce you as my girlfriend.

It felt nice to hit send on that message.

[sokkascroptop]

traitor. (sokka x f!reader) pt 3

A/N: Finally we get to see Azula’s true nature! Also, the first time we get to see Zuko!! To be clear, Azula is in this fic a lot, but this is far from a redemption fic. 

part 1 | part 2 | part 4

Zuko caught Y/N’s eyes like he wanted to ask her a million questions. But she was too embarrassed about everything to hold his gaze. She looked away hoping she didn’t look too guilty or shameful. She joined Azula in staring out the window. The cherry blossom trees were in bloom. They covered every square inch of sky as she looked out. It filled the room with a sweet scent that Y/N knew was going to permeate their clothes when they left. If she let her eyes go unfocused it looked like there was a raging fire in front of her. 

Y/N found herself outside in the palace gardens. She was running from something, but it wasn’t scary. She was laughing and she heard other girls laughing around her. She began to climb a tree, stifling her giggles the entire time. For some reason, she had to be quiet.

“You’re going to get in trouble for being up there,” Someone said from below. 

Y/N looked down between the branches to see a boy her age. He was wearing a high ponytail held with a small fire pin. 

“Why?” she asked. She jumped down to the lowest branch and sat there hanging her legs over the side. She didn’t want to get down just yet. 

He arched one eyebrow. “Just ‘cause. If the palace gardener sees you climbing the trees, he’ll yell at you.”

“Well I’ll just tell him that my new friend is Princess Azula and that’ll shut him up.” Y/N laughed again and made a start to go back up the tree.

“Well, I’m her older brother Prince Zuko and I’m telling you, you’re gonna get in trouble.” He looked like he wanted to emphasize his sentence by sticking his tongue out at her. 

“Why aren’t you playing hide-and-explode with us?” Y/N asked. She jumped down and landed lightly in front of Zuko. They were the same height, which made her feel oddly proud. 

“I don’t like playing games with Azula,” Zuko said. “I’m ten–”

“–well I’m nine and a half and I can still have fun,” Y/N interrupted. 

“You’re almost my age and you’re friends with Azula? What happened? Did you get held back?” Zuko taunted.

“No!” Y/N made a face. Suddenly she felt very self conscious. She didn’t know what ‘held back’ meant but it didn’t sound good, not when he was laughing at her. “This is the first time I’ve ever gone to real school. I just got put in her grade.” 

Suddenly a fireball landed at Y/N’s feet; sparks flew up and singed her pants and burnt her legs. She squealed, a mix between surprise and pain. 

“Azula!” Zuko snarled. He half stepped in front of Y/N, all hints of the earlier teasing gone. Zuko produced a similar fireball and threw it at Azula’s feet but she kicked it away, making it land in a nearby bush. 

“You’re it, Y/N,” Azula ordered. 

“It’s not fair, Azula. She’s not a bender,” Zuko argued. 

“Neither are Mai and Ty Lee. And they don’t whine like babies.” The last part she directed at Y/N with a sneer. 

“I’m not whining!” Y/N protested. She pushed Zuko out of the way and covered her eyes, beginning to count to twenty. She peeked at Zuko at fifteen. All the girls had already scattered but he just stood there watching her. “I’m faster than Azula anyways. I can catch her.” 

She paused and looked at Zuko who stood there awkwardly. “Are you going to hide or what?” She asked. When she covered her eyes again she heard him run away, looking for a hiding place. She waited a beat before counting again, “–SIXTEEN, SEVENTEEN..”

Y/N woke to darkness. But it was always dark below deck. The only light came from candles and lanterns hung in the hallways. Her own candle was only an inch high and fading fast from the accumulation of wax. She could feel the familiar rock of the ship lulling her back to sleep… Y/N sat up quickly. She could tell that it was morning, possibly very early but she couldn’t risk going back to sleep. She tucked the covers under her neck and over her shoulders to snuggle down to ask the important questions. Why was she dreaming of Zuko? 

The day they met was probably one of their most innocent and least notable moments. At least that’s what she thought. Or it was possible her brain was trying to make her feel guilty about what she and Azula were going to do today. That day wasn’t the last that Zuko had tried to protect her from his sister, it actually set the stage for years of him standing up to Azula in her place. Not that she needed it, she could hold her own plenty, but it felt nice to be protected. 

Sometimes she wondered if they had more time together, if they’d have become better friends than her and Azula. Even though he was a fire-bender too, he spent a lot of training with his dual swords. Time that was spent with her on the training grounds. They sparred daily until his banishment; spirits, Y/N was sure they’d even sparred the day of the war meeting that started everything. Now she was going to find him, and lie to him, knowing that what awaited him at home was not a crown but a prison cell. Y/N shook her head to clear it and slid out of the bed and into her clothes. No use in thinking of the past when her future was all that was necessary. Honor and glory and all. 

Y/N could hear Iroh and Zuko arguing a mile away. Azula and her had gotten there an hour before and broke inside the little cabin they were living in. They’d not so inconspicuously gone through all their stuff and upon not finding anything worth while, sat around just waiting. 

“We don’t need any more useless things. You forget we have to carry everything for ourselves now!” Zuko lamented as Iroh dumped a bag of seashells on the table by the door, that looked suspiciously like the same seashells next to Azula on their dining table. Neither one had looked up to see them inside. 

“Hello, brother,” Azula said. “Uncle.” Both of the men jumped. 

“What are you doing here?” Zuko asked as he stepped his body in front of Iroh’s. He looked from Azula to where Y/N was sitting in the window sill behind Azula. Her stomach dropped. This was the first time she’d seen his scarred face. Pink and red scars circled his left eye and wrapped far back enough to cover his ear. His hair was no longer long, but shaved around his ponytail. He looked so much older even though it had only been three years. Y/N wasn’t sure what made him look so different, whether it was a scar that marred his face or the anger that seeped deep beneath his pores. 

“In my country we exchange a pleasant hello before asking questions.” Azula picked up a seashell and inspected it. She glided across the room to stand in front of him. She was so much shorter than Zuko and Y/N but she carried so much power. “Have you become uncivilized so soon, Zuzu?”

“Don’t call me that!”

“To what do we owe this honor?” Iroh spoke up, breaking up the fight between the siblings before it started. Y/N moved to stand behind Azula. 

“Hmm, must be a family trait. Both of you are so quick to get to the point.” Azula was still playing with the men like they were rabbit-mice. She snapped the shell she was holding in her hands. “I’ve come with a message from home. Father has changed his mind. Family is suddenly very important to him. He’s heard rumors of plans to overthrow him–treacherous plots.” Y/N looked to Zuko to gauge his reaction. His face had softened at hearing the news from his Father.

“Family are the only ones you can really trust,” Azula told him earnestly. “Father regrets your banishment. He wants you home.” Azula paused to look out the window. 

Zuko caught Y/N’s eyes like he wanted to ask her a million questions. But she was too embarrassed about everything to hold his gaze. She looked away hoping she didn’t look too guilty or shameful. She joined Azula in staring out the window. The cherry blossom trees were in bloom. They covered every square inch of sky as she looked out. It filled the room with a sweet scent that Y/N knew was going to permeate their clothes when they left. If she let her eyes go unfocused it looked like there was a raging fire in front of her. 

When no one said anything, Azula whipped her head back around to stare at her brother. “Did you hear me? You should be happy, excited, grateful. I just gave you great news.”

“I’m sure your brother simply needs a moment–”

“Don’t interrupt, Uncle!” Her voice changed from sickeningly sweet as she plied Zuko with the words he wanted to hear to savage as she screamed at Iroh. Azula had never learned to be patient, and she wanted them on the ship now. “I still haven’t heard my thank you,” She growled at Zuko. “I’m not a messenger. I didn’t have to come all this way. I could have sent Y/N for this.”

Y/N tensed at her words. She bit her tongue so hard that she tasted blood. How dare Azula think she was her messenger hawk?

“Father regrets? He wants me back?” Zuko muttered. Y/N felt like this was a conversation with himself that they were all intruding on. Y/N had to admit that the words that Azula used to trick them were sweet as honey, but also not very believable. 

Y/N touched the back of Azula’s arm. “I think that he needs time to take this in. It’s all very sudden for him.” She sent a smile in Zuko’s direction that he did not return. 

“I’ll send Y/N to call on you tomorrow.” Azula concluded and she and Y/N took their leave. 

“Why are you sending me tomorrow?” Y/N asked once they were out of range of the house. 

“Zuko trusts you more than he does me,” Azula admitted. “I figure even if he decided he doesn’t want to come, you’ll be able to sweet talk him down the hill to our little ship.”

“Zuko and I were–” 

“Oh shut up, Y/N. You two always had an eye for one another.”

Y/N felt her cheeks heat up. “I–”

“Besides that’s the reason my Father wanted you to come anyways.” They had reached the wooden dock that the ramp to their ship rested on. 

Y/N stopped dead in her tracks. “What?” 

Azula cocked her head. “Well, I figured you’d caught on to that already the way you were making moony eyes at my brother up there.”

“I wasn’t–How was I supposed to know I was only brought here to flirt Zuko’s ass all the way back to the Fire Nation?!” 

“Just back to the ship. Once he gets here we’ll put him in a jail cell.”

“AZULA!”

“Look,” she snarled. “You’re good with a sword but what the hell is that going to do against a fire bender? It’s a fact that you being a non bender means you’re a liability in a fight.” Azula turned and marched up the ramp. That was the end of the discussion even if Y/N had more to say. 

She looked down at her toes at the blue-green water between the slats. She could feel her eyes burning with unshed tears. She blinked them away and followed Azula onto the ship. 

Y/N fisted her hands in her tunic and stalked to her room. Control your anger, control your anger she repeated over and over in her head. She wasn’t like Azula or Zuko, she couldn’t make something with the anger that grew and festered in her chest. She couldn’t throw a fireball at the nearest wall and hope that her anger dissipated like the sparks that fell to the floor. She shut her door and immediately balled up her fist and let it slam home against the wall. The thin metal crumpled easily under her hand. It stung, but that was good. Y/N let out a breath she thought she’d been holding since the dock. She collapsed onto her bed and pulled her knees to her chest. 

It wasn’t a secret that she was a non-bender. But it’s not like it didn’t hurt to be reminded that she wasn’t as worthy because she was one. 

Please like/reblog!!

[litwitlady]

love at any cost is a bargain

Vultures are circling overhead. Fixated on the lifeless body down below. Wanting nothing more than to land and devour. Their only deterrent the two men dragging the dead man through the scorching desert heat.

Michael and Alex are soaked in sweat. Alex is limping and Michael is desperately trying to lighten his load. But his powers have been drained dry and the best he can do is take most of the man’s weight himself. But Alex is still limping.

They are at least half a mile from the Chevy when Alex finally collapses, crying out in pain. That sound might be the worst thing Michael has ever heard. At least since the last time Alex had wailed in pain. Not even fifteen minutes ago. Michael kneels beside him, hands immediately going to his right knee.

‘My leg’s done, Guerin. I’m sorry.’ There’s so much guilt in his voice that Michael feels his eyes well with angry, frustrated tears. Not at Alex. Never at Alex. At the mess he himself has gotten them into. Again. And at the hurt he has no way of healing.

‘Don’t you be sorry. This is my fault. I never should have dragged you out here in the first place.’ He squints up at the buzzards.

‘You…you didn’t have to kill that guy. I’m sorry about that.’ Alex won’t meet his eyes.

Michael squeezes his own eyes shut. Letting them burn as sweat mingles with tears. After several deep breaths, he cups Alex’s cheeks in his hands and waits until Alex looks back at him. ‘He was hurting you. And I’d do it a million times again. Do you understand me?’

Alex nods weakly. ‘Was that the first man you ever killed?’

The last hour replays in Michael’s head. All the initial hope he had felt when Alex agreed to work with him on this insane mission. Their incredible teamwork and laughter. The sweet promise that maybe they were finally working their way back to each other. And then the alien appearing out of nowhere and kicking Alex’s bad knee out from under him. Everything ruined in an instant.

Without even the slightest hesitation, Michael had crushed the man’s throat – concentrating all his telekinesis on stealing the alien’s breath. The sounds he’d made as he choked on his own blood keep pounding through Michael’s head. But he had been honest with Alex. He’d do anything to keep him safe. Anything.

‘It doesn’t matter. It’s done now.’ He wipes the sweat from his brow and stands up. ‘I’ve going to get you out of here. Come back for the body after.’ He squats and places Alex’s arm over his shoulders, lifting them both with his tired legs.

‘The vultures aren’t going to wait. Maybe you should leave me here – take the body instead. What if someone else finds it?’

Michael stops dead, huffs out an annoyed laugh. ‘Fuck the body, Alex. I only care about you.’ It comes out harsher than he means it to. ‘Anyway, truck can’t be too far. Let’s just get there and hope one of us has cell reception. Or that my powers don’t take forever to recharge.’

They struggle the rest of the way – Michael basically carrying Alex. The sun climbs higher in the sky and they are both panting by the time they see the pickup break through the hazy horizon.

Michael’s telekinesis has returned enough to open the truck’s door with no hands. He lifts Alex up and onto the bench seat, pressing his forehead into Alex’s shoulder as he catches his breath.

Neither of their cell phones has any signal. Michael swears and throws his useless phone onto the dashboard. ‘Let’s get this off you.’ He bends down and starts untying Alex’s boot.

‘I can do that.’ Alex swats at his hands, but Michael grabs his wrists, gently placing them back on his lap.

They lock eyes and Michael sighs. ‘I know you can. But I am going to do it this time. And you’re going to let me.’ He slides his hands back down Alex’s thigh and starts to remove the prosthesis. Breath catching when Alex reaches out and pushes a stray curl off his forehead.

Once Alex is more comfortable, Michael sits in the footwell and chugs two bottles of acetone. ‘I don’t want to leave you like this, but I’ve got to go get that body.’

‘Is there no way to get the truck past the fence?’ It’s a good question but Michael just shakes his head.

‘Worked on Peterson’s ranch a few months one summer. Keeps everything locked up real tight.’ He tosses the empty nail polish remover over his shoulder, rising to his feet again. ‘Listen to me.’ He opens the glove department and pulls out his revolver. ‘If you see anyone – anyone at all – shoot. I’ll hear the gunshot and run back.’ He places the gun in Alex’s hand, closing his fingers around the barrel. ‘The trigger gets a little sticky sometimes.’ He hears how shaky his voice is and tries to clear his throat. ‘I hate leaving you here.’

‘Michael, there’s no one around. I have a gun. And I’ve been in worse situations. Go – I’ll be fine.’ He rests their foreheads together until Michael bends down to leave a soft kiss on Alex’s right knee and turns away.

The minutes tick by uneventfully. Not a soul in sight. Eventually, Michael returns – body floating in front of him as he maneuvers it through the fence posts. He drops the dead man into the bed of his truck and heads directly for Alex. Finds him sprawled across the seat and panics.

Without thinking, Michael flings himself on Alex, straddling his waist. Searching frantically for signs of life. And then Alex screams, pointing the gun at Michael’s head – just shy of squeezing the trigger.

He’d only been asleep.

Michael falls forward, placing his head on Alex’s chest. Listens to his strong, steady heartbeat. Alex drops the gun and weaves his fingers through Michael’s hair. And they lie there for a long time, syncing their breaths together and slowing their heartrates.

Alex’s phone chimes. ‘Liz texted. Says Isobel and Max are on their way.’

Reluctantly, Michael untangles himself from Alex and slides out of the truck. Alex follows as far as he can, scooting to the edge of the seat. He tugs at Michael’s shirt, pulling him back between his thighs. Looks him in the eye. ‘It’s okay, you know. Not to be okay with killing someone. Even for a good reason.’

‘I’m fine, Alex. I –‘

Alex brushes his thumb across Michael’s bottom lip, effectively shutting him up. ‘I know that. I’m just saying that you don’t have to be fine. Not with me.’

Michael takes a shuddering breath. ‘I’ve never asked you about what happened over there. If you’re okay. Are you?’

Alex’s shoulders droop as he sighs. ‘No. But I keep trying every day.’

‘I should have been there for you better. Instead of always being so angry. I’m sorry.’ He wraps his arms around Alex’s shoulders, settling him in against his chest. ‘I want to be good for you, Alex. But I’m not sure I am.’

‘You are. You are, Michael. There’s no one I feel safer with. There’s never been anyone I felt safer with.’ He tightens his arms around Michael’s waist. Both their thoughts drifting to the dead man in the bed of the truck.

Max and Isobel arrive a few minutes later. Find Michael and Alex holding each other and leave them that way. Rolling the body into a rug and dumping him in the back of Isobel’s SUV. Intending to take him to Liz’s new lab. Isobel puts a comforting hand on Michael’s shoulder and then they leave.

Alex is the first to pull away. ‘Take me home.’

Michael nods and shuts the door. Heads to the driver’s side and slips in next to Alex. He starts the engine and grips the steering wheel. ‘Can I stay with you tonight? In case I’m not okay?’ He darts his eyes over to Alex who smiles at him softly.

‘You can stay with me every night. And you never have to okay.’

Michael slides closer to him, kisses him gently on the corner of his mouth and whispers thank you.

[dimonds456]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27269650/chapters/66625315#workskin

Tw: Disassociation, anxiety (tho nothing too bad!)

This is a response to @steven-universe-au-prompts’s post, now featuring a second chapter and an Ao3 link. Enjoy!

Steven thought for a moment. He’d have to be careful about what he’d tell her, as her knowing just how messed up he was could lead to something bad. She must not know, else she would have confronted him already.

The fact that not even Garnet knew how much he was hiding was scary. He didn’t want it to be, though. He was so, so tired of being scared all the time. But, he had to be careful. He had to be. Maybe breaking it to her slowly was the best way to do this?

The whole time he thought, Garnet hadn’t moved. She let him gather his thoughts together, still running a hand through his hair affectionately. If she knew everything that was bothering him, would that hand still be there? Would it be again? The anxiety of the unknown, and Steven knowing he was taking a risk at her expense, was suffocating.

“A-actually,” he murmured, “I need to- I need time to really get together what I wanna say. Is…” he looked up at her again. “Is that okay?”

Now, logically, Steven knew that Garnet would agree. She knew how hard it was to carry burdens like this (oh gosh,he was just adding to the pile, wasn’t he?), so she’d be more than happy to continue this discussion in the morning. But man, his brain, fresh off of hurting both a stranger and a family member, did not let him alone after the question was out of his mouth.

It was easy- almost too easy- to imagine Garnet pushing him, begging to know more so he never hurts someone again, telling him that he was a threat that needed to be contained as fast as possible. If he went back to sleep, he would have a nightmare and scream, breaking the bedroom around him, debris falling onto the lower floor, a sharp piece of wood landing at just the right angle on top of Pearl or Amethyst, then more to slam it in like a knife, they’d poof, and it’s his fault-

“Sure, Steven- we can continue this conversation whenever you’re ready.” Garnet gave Steven one last squeeze before standing up, letting his bed shift back to normal without the added weight from her.

Gems were not organic, anyone could tell you that, but because of their hard light exteriors, they did radiate a faint heat not unlike that of another human being. They ran a bit colder, but that was fine on any day. Their forms had to constantly run more light through them, too, creating something akin to a heartbeat as well, refreshing their bodies to make sure they didn’t deteriorate.

When Garnet stood up, her spot felt cold. Empty.

“I’m going to be downstairs,” the maroon gem announced softly. “Come down if you need anything.”

Steven gave a light nod to show he heard. “‘Kay. Thanks.”

Garnet gave him a nod and a thumbs up in return, smiling at him, before reaching a hand up to flick across her face. Her visor reappeared, and she exited his room swiftly and with confidence. She gently shut his door behind her, and he listened to her heavy footsteps retreat back down the stairs.

Steven remained where he was for a while, sitting upright in bed, facing the window. He could see his clock out of the corner of his eye, but he didn’t face it for fear of what number would be displayed on it. It was still dark outside, and so the teen was happy to relish in the fact that he still had plenty of time to catch some sleep. Which he could do at any time.

Any moment now.

Aaaaany minute now, he’d lie back down and finally fall asleep.

But, he found himself frozen. His mind wasn’t empty per say- he had too many thoughts to latch onto one at once- but he still found it blank. In his mind’s eye, he could see the next morning to clearly: he’d get up, smile, go about his morning routine, then tell Garnet about all the demons in his head.

“Hey, Garnet! Good morning! So, I’ve had some time to think, and I think I’m ready to open up now. So, that scream was only a little bit of what’s new. Did you know that every time I turn pink, things around me start to break? I actually beat Jasper in a fight on my own- or at least I could have if I didn’t stop- and I can slow down time! That’s cool, except all of those things happen whenever I’m mad, or upset, or stressed, or just generally not okay, which means I’m glowing a lot. Did you know I’ll start glowing if I’m just alone in my room thinking about things? One time I was taking a shower and I just remembered that time right before Ruby and Sapphire’s wedding when I took a shower, too, and I started glowing! Every time someone mentions Mom at this point, I start glowing! So, yeah, I guess don’t ever be negative near me or I might blow you to smithereens!”

Cuz that would go over wonderfully with her.

But, he told her that he would open up more- no, he told her that he would trust her more, and trusting her mean trusting her to not fall apart on him. But, could he do that? If she did, Ruby ya day Sapphire would be in turmoil, and he’d need to bring them together again, for a third- possibly fourth- time.

Just thinking about that fallout was exhausting.

But, he promised. So, he’d need to start with smaller things and go bigger from there, right? Small things to tell her that might set him off…

Well, what small things were there? He thought for a moment, not entirely sure what counted as a “big” thing or a “small” thing himself yet.

Mom? Definitely a big thing, and she already knew about that one. She hadn’t fallen apart over the big one. That was good. But, did she know just how big was big, and just how bad it was? Surly she didn’t- she only knew what he and Pearl had told her. So, yeah, she was probably missing a few things here and there, and Rose was a big stressor for all of them. How much more could she take?

Probably shouldn’t talk about her, then.

Jasper? No, absolutely not. Steven was a pacifist. If she found out that he’d engaged a fight with her and nearly beat her, she’d flip.

The time thing with Smokey? That one seemed a lot more tame, but Steven couldn’t really remember what emotion had caused that pink. The roller coaster was about to go into the water, and they weren’t going to make it in time. Determination, maybe? But determination could be a positive emotion, and he’d figured out that his pink powers were negative a long while ago. Unless…? Maybe he was wrong about them. Maybe they were just a power upgrade from everything before, and he’d just never yelled loudly enough to break anything before…?

No, that was dumb. But maybe Garnet could help him figure it out. Maybe she could help him figure out all his powers. He just needed to be open and honest, and trust her. He had to trust her. That was the whole point

But, how much to trust her with? How much could she take? At what point was it selfish to dump everything on her? Would this help or hurt her future vision? Would she tell Amethyst and Pearl? His dad? How would they take it? They’d flip! Pearl would blame herself for not being there, or not seeing it sooner, even though this was all his fault, and Amethyst would try to take his mind off stuff while suppressing her emotions so she didn’t fall apart on him, but she would. They all would.

Wouldn’t they?

His gem hummed, and suddenly, Steven was glowing again. His heart spiked in panic, and he tried to force himself to calm down. It wasn’t as hard as last time, so the glow was gone within a second or so, but just the fact that he had glowed- again- just because he was thinking about stuff was telling. He was falling apart, and needed to keep himself together. For them. If he fell apart, they would, too, and no one would be able to pick up the pieces.

He couldn’t do that to them. He just couldn’t.

So, he forced himself to just lay back down, close his eyes, and try to sleep. Just try. That was something he could do for himself. He’d have a clearer head in the morning.

Tomorrow, he’d tell Garnet about Smokey Quartz, and they’d figure it out from there.

It took a while, but eventually, he fell asleep. It was going to be okay.

He had to trust that it was going to be okay.

[calypsoff]

Eighteen

Shaking my head lightly “you annoyed?” Barry asked me between him packing his case and looking at me “a little, she’s barely responding to me. She is busy, like she called me and in the background I just hear someone say Rihanna we need you back, I hate that shit. Like why do I need to be there!?” Barry snorted laughing “you sound like you just want her attention on you, she is working Chris and she wants you to be supportive of that and be there to you know, I don’t know rub her feet. Hug her, maybe she wants you to see what she does, why are you the way you are? I mean seriously, enjoy the time. Hair is being paid for, you just turn up!” Barry is excited but I see it for a different point of view, I just hate the shit. He’s going to be all pointing like that is her boyfriend, I am Chris, shit is weird “but she hasn’t called me back? I’ve called her for the third time now, I could be dying” Barry laughed out “you’re annoying, be there for her. Don’t be a pain, which I see you will be. Shit, I am so excited for this. I’m going to be on Rihanna tour, she followed me you know. On Instagram!” He is so excited, they all see it differently then I do “I got my chains on, these are pussy magnets. Foreign pussy” TJ randomly came in to tell us they “be quiet, but yeah. I will get my shit together” getting up from the bed “if she dumps you I will be the man to take over” shaking my head laughing, Barry so stupid but I just hate that she is not picking up her calls, I miss her a lot. I am not even being funny about it, I just miss her so much. Just speaking about random shit, when she is answering my calls it’s straight to the point, then it’s like because I think she knew I wanted to speak longer she goes haven’t you got some clothes to promote, that pissed me off but it’s annoying me, she knows it and I hate it. Now she’s not even answering but yet promoting this shit tour on her page.

We got an Uber to go to the airport, we got a late flight out and got a cheap hotel because the flight is leaving in the early hours and if I am not there I do not want to hear Robyn about it “I expected more, like where is the driver?” Looking behind me and at the backseat at TJ “and who are you!?” I spat laughing “I am your best friend, I just wanted to be escorted. Like dang we are flying commercial, where the fuck is the good stuff” shaking my head at him “you think your girl is angry at you because of the whole girl thing in Virginia” Barry had to remind me “I didn’t ask for a picture with her, she just took it but I think she is just busy, genuinely too” turning back around, I can’t believe my picture with that girl in the bar ended up on blogs, I looked so wasted and then Robyn didn’t really care for it but she wasn’t amused, she just said be careful and that I need to remember who I am dating like she doesn’t remind me every few days, I think it did annoy her a little. The girl was on my lap and I don’t even remember that part at all. Actually thinking back to it, she could be angry about that, I don’t know anymore. She hasn’t kept in contact with me at all, I am pissed off myself, she hasn’t said anything to me, and I am started to become annoyed.

We checked into the cheap hotel, still Robyn hasn’t contacted me, and I don’t think she will until the day. But she has posted a rehearsal picture, nice of her “I personally think that as her boyfriend we should be held in a higher status, ok maybe not us but you yes, we are in a cheap hotel sharing a bed” I jumped on the bed laughing “it’s cute, I am the big spoon” I pointed at TJ “mhmmm, I like being the small spoon. Just to feel your body heat on me” rubbing my face laughing “nigga dumb, well what we doing then. We in New York?” Barry shook his head “if we have to be there in the morning, sleep that is what” I guess he has a point, looking up from my sneaker seeing TJ recording “niggas on tour” putting two fingers up at him “my nigga Breezy and Breeze” I feel a little fed up and we haven’t done anything, I just feel it because of the lack of contact. I feel annoyed already and this is no good because I know me, I am going to be mean as fuck. I am going to try and be nice but we will see tomorrow. Imagine not speaking to someone that has never been on tour, that doesn’t know what he is doing. It makes no sense to me at all, I would be in contact with her because I would know she is new to it but that is just me.

Barry stared at me, he is annoyed with me but I am more then annoyed with him but I guess we all dumb, we are slightly late but they still processing people and she hasn’t contacted me still, I feel like a second citizen and I am very much ready to go back to Texas. Where the fuck do I go, where do I stand. There is a lot of journalists and fans here in this line, I wouldn’t call it a line. More of a mess of people just stood around “should we be really here? They were screaming earlier because they saw Rihanna’ manager, that is why I asked” TJ is nosey, I nodded my head “I am pissed off, not going to lie. I am here for y’all now. Because I know how excited you all are” that is the honest truth, I did it for them “thanks” TJ said, I chuckled “that is him” TJ pointed “who?” I questioned “manager” he stared at me and I just stared at him, he sniggered, that was not smile. It was more of a snigger but whatever “I don’t care, I don’t even know dude like that, I don’t know what he is smiling at anyways” shaking my head “so is this it?” I am so grumpy right now, but you can’t blame me when this shit is happening, how the fuck am I here and Robyn is wherever, is this her punishment because I didn’t want to initially go with her to California.

Checking my phone, nothing at all. We are currently outside waiting to board to be honest, but there is a lot of waiting around and that alone irritates me but it’s whatever “name?” this girl asked “Barry” seeing a couple of fans starting to run off in a way, I looked to where they was running too “and you?” the girl said, I don’t know who she is “Chris” I mumbled, seeing Robyn walking eith her entourage, black shades on, black tank “excuse me” looking to the lady “you should be up ahead?” she pointed out “nah, that is a mistake. I will be here” walking off, I rather sit with my friends. Looking back at Robyn and she is smiling wide and is going up the stairs at the front end of the Boeing, me on the other hand is entering the back side “shawty got a big crew, she looks happy” pushing TJ to walk, we need to go. I just want to sit and go to sleep, I am tired. Even though we came late, we still left late so it’s whatever.

I am not happy, that is the actual truth and I am pissed the fuck off “aren’t you Rihanna’ boyfriend?” looking up at this random guy sitting in front of us “nah” I laughed shaking my head “uhm I think you are” I shrugged laughing, this guy started to get his phone out and I kind of died inside now because this is awkward, I am sat in the nosebleeds and I look dumb, TJ looked at me and I looked at him, this is not good “yeah, this is you” he turned his phone to me, this is awkward “bro, it’s a mirage” I need him to not “you’re her boyfriend and you’re sat here, already. I am Jason by way, what is it like to date Rihanna? Weren’t you welcome there” this guy is annoying me “just leave it, thanks” I said nicely, I am trying to be nice “did she leave you because you are a criminal” I got up from my seat and gripped his tee “I said fucking get off my dick” pushing him back, the whole flight went silent “sir, can you please sit down or we will need to remove you” sitting back in my seat “I will fuck you up now shut the fuck up” lowering my snapback, I am fucking angry. He is just talking so much fucking shit in my face, how is that even fair.

I feel like the flight is talking about me, I am just going to sleep through the flight. Robyn did call once, that was it. She can go and be what she wants to be “Chris” moving my snapback up seeing Mel “you need to come up front” staring at Mel, do I want to be escorted like a child to the front, no I don’t “I am good here” I said in a whisper, everyone is so quiet and it’s because they are trying to hear “can I just sit in the middle for a minute” Mel said to TJ, he got up from the seat to let Mel sit “I will go the bathroom then” nodding my head, I don’t want to hear it, I am stubborn about this “Robyn wants you to come up front, you shouldn’t be here” Mel said in my ear, rolling my eyes “tell her I am good here, she ignored me all this time and now she wants me to come?” I laughed “we heard, you attacked a journalist, the whole flight knows Chris. Robyn is busy, she will be busy. Don’t be the one to add to it” it’s always about her “I am staying here Mel, it doesn’t hurt to text me and call me. To tell me where to go, shit. Even say we will meet up when I land, nothing. If she wants me to come then she will come herself, and the journalist deserved it” I don’t want to argue with her friends “you don’t do that over here Chris, it’s making her look bad but ok” she got up from the seat, I do not care about that.

TJ did a nervous laugh “we about to kicked out the tour, I guess we get one out of the seven” not going to lie but it made me laugh “nigga said one out of the seven” I said laughing, I expected Robyn to text me, I did. I mean of course she would, to make it seem I am in the wrong, unlocking the phone to see her message.

Twin: What did I say about stressing me out now!? Out of all the days, you fucking HAD to do that, the talk about you being sat there like a fucking dumbass.

Oh she is angry well she can be, messaging her back.

Chris: How yu making this about me when you didn’t message me all fucking day, what did yu want me to do? This is on yu not me.

Twin: Get your ass here NOW! Or this fall out will be bigger then it is

Chris: No

Twin: Tina is coming there, yu come here now

Chris: I will visit

Getting up in a huff “where you going?” TJ asked, side eyeing him, and he let out an oh as he got up to let me out “I will be back” I ain’t staying there, she probably wants to tell me how wrong I was, how I am making her look bad, the usual. This is going to be a long way to the front, not only was I going to attack a journalist now the whole plane knows I am sitting here, and I did that, they know who I am “are you ok sir?” the attendant asked, “uh yeah” walking into the next section up, these are loud as fuck, I mean they are hype as fuck about this trip I guess “party with us Chris?” I don’t even know these people “I will pass on this” I laughed just walking, I don’t want to be in this mood, but Robyn is wrong, now she will be all hurt by it. I feel like I am going to be an ass, I don’t want to be that, but she brings that out of me.

Her bodyguard was about to pounce on me thinking I just came into the first class without being someone in her circle, but he stopped himself, realising who I were. Robyn is busy here I see, having fun. Her smile soon faded, she is not happy, and neither am I. She waved me over and I proceeded to see her, she sat down in her little private seating, nice of her. I didn’t bother to look at others, I am not staying “hey” crouching down to her “why are you sitting there?” first thing she asked “because the very person that is supposed to be there for me isn’t there, you didn’t text me or anything. You haven’t even called, not even a quick text to say hey Chris meet me here, you didn’t even care for me like that, what am I to you?” I am trying to speak at a whisper, but I feel like it is getting higher “I am busy Chris, I expect you to use your brain. And you had to attack a journalist” she thinks I am wrong and I think she is, this is about to be annoying.

[saelwen]

The Last Dragon

Daenys Targaryen x Thranduil

Crossover: Game of Thrones and LOTR/Hobbit

Chapter6

Masterlist

Summary:After Daenerys death, her daughter Daenys, flew away with Drogon. Feeling lost with out her mother beside her, but what will happen when Daenys find a portal that will lead her to a certain world, where dwell elves, dwarves, humans and other races.

Warnigs: Fluff

Words: 1.463

Two days have pass since the company have left me behind. I still can’t believe it that they left without me, even if Gandalf had said I was still part the quest. A sigh falls from me as i was sitting on my balcony room, watching the trees sing with the wind. My stay here has been amazing, the elves were kind and always help me whatever I was lost in this huge Palace. Me and Thranduil got closer, spending afternoons together in the garden. I’m not going to lie, I've fallen in love. He looks like a cold and heartless King but in reality, he is a kind and brave King, always worry with his kin and doing what’s better for them.  

A knock on my door interrupted my thoughts, looking back to the door “Come in!” I say softly. The door open and Thranduil walk in, with a serious face “What’s wrong?” I ask a while a stand up from the sofa. He walks to my bed and sat down “The dwarfs have awakened the dragon...He’s destroying the Laketown and my son is there!” his voice came out like a sob, I run to him and wrap my arms around his shaking form. He hides is face on my neck, I could feel his warm tears on my skin. Rubbing my small hand on his back “Shh...It’s okay...Legolas will be okay. He’s a smart ellon, he knows how to stay safe.” I say softly to him, kissing his soft silver hair “I know...but I worry about him, I always had....I’ve been a terrible father..” he let out a small sob and wrap his arms around my waist. I continue calming him down, we lie down on the bed and stay there. Thranduil push away a little, so he could look to my eyes. He moves his hand to my cheek and rubs softly “Please...never leave me...” his voice was soft and sweet, full of love. I nod “I will never.” he begins lean down his head, staying inch away from my lips, looking into my eyes asking for permission. I slowly nod and with that he crashes his lips into mine, kissing me softly.

The kiss was passionate, making a moan escape from me. We break away and look to each other, with huge smiles on our faces “Sleep now...Tomorrow we have much to do.” he says softly a while closing his eyes.

After some minutes, I hear his breath become heavy, telling that he's fast asleep. I get out from his arms and bed slowly, careful for not awake him up, and walk to my wardrobe. I grab my travel clothes and change very quick.  

Stopping by the door, I look back to the sleep form of Thranduil. I’m sorry...but I have to do this! I walk out of my chambers and went to the gardens, where is an entrance to a small clearing. As I arrive, I saw Drogon standing there waiting for me. Walking to him, I pet his warm snout “Hello, old friend.” he starts purring, I chuckle a little and climb to his back, grabbing his spikes “Come on, Drogon! Let’s show that stupid dwarfs of what you can do!” with that Drogon jumps in air and flap his huge wings, flying us into the deep night.

                                               ~~~~~~~~~~~~

When we arrive near the Laketown, I saw a massive fire destroying all town. Fuck! How Thorin let this happen? I order Drogon fly higher in the air, to try spot Smaug. After sometime looking, I saw him preparing to let out another blow in the town “It’s show time!” and with that Drogon dived down in the air.  

As Smaug was about to let out his fire, Drogon grabbed him by his neck and bite off his skin. Smaug let out a loud cry “WHO ARE YOU?!” he screamed to me and Drogon, I look down to him and smirk “Your worst nightmare!” with that Drogon’s feet grab his wings and took him high in the air. Smaug try everything to break free from us but Drogon was much stronger than him, I look down to the town and saw that we were far enough to kill him. I grip tightly to Drogon spikes and yell on top of my lungs “DRACARYS!” and with that Drogon dumped all his fire into Smaug, melting his scales.

Smaug let scream of pain “HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE!? FIRE CAN NOT KILL ME!” he screams in agony, “You were made with dark fire! A while Drogon was made with pure fire.” I said to him. Drogon stops and bite Smaug neck again, tearing off his head.  

I took a deep breath as Smaug body falls into the lake. We did it! We save the town! I pet Drogon warm scales “You did good, my friend!” he let out a little roar. I chuckle, looking forward I saw the sun shining on the horizon, bringing light to all the land.  

Suddenly I begin hearing little cheers far away, looking down I saw the town people applauding me and cheering for begin alive. A small smile forms on my lips, a happy sensation run through my body. So this is how mother felt when she set free all the slaves.  

I order Drogon to dive down and land on the shore. As he lands, people begin running to us, cheering and thanking me for saving them. Slowly, I climb down of Drogon back and as I got closer to the people, a little girl jumps into my arms, wrapping her little arms around my neck “Oh Thank you! Thank you!” she whispers to me. A smile appears on my lips and I wrap my arms around her small frame “Your welcome, little Lady!” all the sudden a girl, who looks older than this child, come running towards us “TILDA! Don’t disappear like that!” the little girl let me go and turn to the other girl “Sorry, Sister...But I wanted to thank your savior ...and also to see the dragon...” at the last phrase, I let out a loud laugh. I put my hand on Tilda shoulder “If you want, you can pet him.” at my words, her eyes shined like two little stars “Really??” she squealed, I nod and let her go to Drogon, who was lying down. She starts rubbing his snout and giggled when he let out his warm breath on her face.  

Suddenly a tall man with long brown hair went to me “In all name of the people of Laketown, we want to thank you for saving us.” he said a while giving me a little bow, I nod “Your welcome...and I'm sorry for not arriving early, like this Smaug didn't had destroyed half the town.” I said with soft voice. The man shakes his head and smile to me “Do not worry, my Lady. We will rebuild a better place for us.” I smile “Oh by the way, my name is Bard.” he says with an embarrassed voice. I chuckle and bow my head to him “Nice to meet you, Bard. My name is Daenys Targaryen and this is my friend Drogon.” I point to Drogon, who was now playing with Tilda. My attention got caught by four small figures walking in my way, I look better and saw Kili Fili, Bofur and Óin standing there with guilty smiles. I walk to them “Well, well, well...What do we have here? Four little dwarfs that were also left behind by the mighty Thorin?” I said sarcastically. They look down to they feet's, Fili was the first to talk “We are sorry, Daenys...We shouldn’t had left you behind but you know how Thorin is!...We are going now to Erebor. Do you want to come?”  he say with a tired voice. A sigh left my mouth, I nod “It’s okay, I forgive you...but not Thorin! And yes I will come with you.” they all nod and turn back to walk to the little boat. I grab Fili shoulder “And where do you think are going?” I ask with a smirk, they stop and look at me with a confused look “To the boat. Why?” Kili said with a confused voice “Well...I have a better way to travel faster.” I said a while looking to Drogon.  

The four dwarfs went pale as I said that, I chuckle and wave them to follow me “Come on! It will be fun.” I said a while walking to Drogon.

Oh boy! This will be fun.....And wait for me Thorin because I will have a talk with you!  

Hey Guys!! New chapter here. I hope that you all are enjoying this series as am I! Feel free to comment and tell me what you think!

XOXO

Taglist: @foggyturtleknightangel​ @moonchild-stuff​ @tigereyesf​ @llama2264​ @crazyonesarethebest​ @yes-captainstark​ @aeryntheofficial​ @gwendelerynan​ @shanty-lol​ @burningcoffeetimetravel​ @numwoon44​ @ultrabumblebeeisus​ @peaky-marvel​ @damnittjim​ @nikipuppeteer​ @ameliana153​

[edierone]

26 and 77 for the mash up list

Five Miles Is a Long Way to Walk In Florsheims

She really did it. 

She — she just pulled over, told me to get out, and — kept on driving. 

I know I was pissing her off this entire case (but especially today), I know I probably (definitely) pushed it too far when I did the vehicular version of Dutch-ovening her just now, a little juvenile humor to lighten the mood … ok, honestly, with the heat on, it was really kind of nauseating, even for me. 

She’s threatened to dump me out before, like a dad yelling at the kids to pipe down or he’ll make ‘em walk home. 

But — this time, she really did it. And here I am, by the side of a two-lane road in the far yonder of cow country, in a cold drizzling rain, in my suit (minus the jacket, which is … still in the car) and cheap dumb dress shoes from JC Penney — thank god I left my Nunn Bush oxfords at home, I guess? — watching the rented Ford’s taillights recede in the far distance.  

I’ll wait a few minutes. She’ll come back. 

Nope. It’s been fifteen already. New plan: Walk till I’m just over that next rise — probably she’s sitting there, waiting for me to catch up, parked on the narrow shoulder with the radio on one of her channels (theory: might’ve been the fourth airing of “Livin’ Lovin’ Maid” that pushed her over the edge; note to self, that’s enough classic rock for today). I’ll show up, she’ll forgive me, and we’ll get back to finding the Phantom Murderin’ Cowboy of BFE. 

*************

Nope. Fox and his tired old dogs are walkin back to Cowburg. 

*************

Five miles is a long way to walk in Florsheims, especially when the seams start to give and your socks are soaked and your hair is in your face and even your belt is ruined. It’s enough time to get titanically self-righteously angry, then run out of steam on that and rethink your position, then feel like utter dogshit for the way you’ve treated the most important person in your life, then script and rehearse your most abject apology speech dozens of times, refining it to remove all traces of self-pity and accusation and adding a few jokey lines so she knows it’s you and not some shapeshifting asshole wearing you as a skin suit or something. 

I’m — I’m properly chastened, is what I’m saying, and all I want is to get back in her good graces. And maybe get some dry clothes on; my balls are rubbed pretty raw at this point. 

Room 27, adjoining room 28, the last two on the end farthest from the road. I start to feel just how bad off I am as I cross the parking lot: I’m freezing, my left knee hurts like a bastard, my ankles feel swollen to the point of sloshiness, my back is killing me, and my feet — oh god, my feet … I limp to good old 27, then realize with a wave of despair that my key is in the pocket of my suit jacket, which I can see crumpled on the floor of the Taurus’s backseat. 

Shit. 

Rather than add “broken rental car window” to my list of crimes and expense items, I gather what’s left of my dignity — there ain’t much — and shuffle over to 28. 

“Knock knock, it’s the bog monster of Black Rock Creek, I’m here to —”

The door swings open so fast I almost fall through it. 

There she is, keys in hand and coat on — that determined/worried little furrow between her eyes quickly smoothing out and hiking skyward as she takes in my bedraggled state. I don’t get a chance to give my apology speech, because she’s already launched into hers: “Jesus, Mulder, you look like a drowned rat! I’m so sorry — I thought it was only a mile or so, but it took you so long, I got worried — you — I was so angry, I guess I just didn’t realize how far it was — oh, look at your shoes! I was coming to get you — god you must be so cold —”

The whole time, she’s dragging me inside, running to the bathroom to grab towels which she tosses at me, bending to help me shuck the worthless bits of leather that used to be size 11 Fed footwear, checking through my sopping-wet hair for head trauma — at least I think that’s what she’s doing, but I don’t really care cause it feels pretty good. 

But I can’t let her do all the apologizing, so all the while, I’m trying to interject with my own mea culpa — about how it’s OK, I’m OK, I was being a dumbass and I deserved it and I’m sorry for questioning her take on the third vic’s cause of death (she was right, I was reaching, and being a dick about it besides), if she wants to Dutch-oven me as revenge, I’ll take it like a man … 

That one finally makes her stop fussing and laugh, her big surprising Scully-laugh that makes me feel like a god for bringing it forth. 

“Mulder …” she finally says, looking me up and down with a mixture of pity and amusement that kinda makes me tingle. “I’ll save that idea for another time. Why don’t you go get a hot shower and I’ll — try to find something to eat. I’m already dressed to go out anyway.” 

I agree to this plan, and in less than an hour, we’re side by side in comfy warm sweatpants on the surprisingly decent couch, eating some of the best tortilla soup I’ve ever tasted. She brought icy cold glass bottles of Coke, too — “Hecho in Mexico, oh man, Scully, that’s the stuff!”

She puts hers down and hops up, going to dig something out of her trench pocket. “I almost forgot! I found something else to warm you up.” She holds it out to me — a pint bottle of Jameson’s. 

“Heyyyyyy!” I reach for it, cracking it open and smelling it. “Where’d you get this? I thought this was a dry county.” 

“It is,” she smiles, with an arch aren’t-I-clever look. “I bought it off the front desk clerk — smelled something on her breath and took the big investigative leap. She charged me a pretty big markup, but I thought it was worth it, under the circumstances.” 

I agree, and ask if we have glasses — but this isn’t the kind of place that furnishes barware, so I guess we’ll have to swig it like a couple of winos under a bridge. 

“I don’t mind swapping spit with you, Scully, if you’re ok with mine,” I say, landing a pretty ill-timed glance at her lips that I hope she doesn’t notice. 

She does. It makes her blush a little, which she brazens through with a big manly belt of the Jameson’s. She hands the bottle to me and dares me with her eyes to do better. 

I can’t, of course, but I try, and as the first gulp slides down my throat, warming me from the inside, I have one of those hot pulses of the deepest kind of affection for her — the kind that just shouts in my head, iloveyouiloveyouiloveyou, so loud that I almost give it voice for real. 

But, of course, I don’t; we finish our dinner, taking occasional nips of whiskey, calling out increasingly sloppy answers at Jeopardy! and then Wheel of Fortune on the crummy motel TV. 

The news is next and neither of us is in the mood, so I click through the five working channels and get lucky: North By Northwest is just starting. I scooch around to get comfortable, but I must’ve stiffened up — both of my hip joints and something up high in my back crack audibly, and the girly scream whistling out of me at the way my calf just seized would be funny if it didn’t hurt so much. 

Well, I guess it’s funny to Scully — she laughs, but apologizes. Then laughs again. She’s ruthless, not to mention mean. I tell her so. She laughs harder. I pout dramatically, and eventually she relents.

“All right, all right — you’ll be useless in the morning if I don’t get you fixed up, and I don’t plan on carrying your bag through DFW airport. Get up on that bed, I’ll massage the kinks out.” 

I swear I do not even have time to open my mouth before she warns, deadly serious: “And if you say one word about this is how some of your favorite movies start —”

Ahh, she knows me, doesn’t she? 

I make like a totally innocent man — pure of heart, mind, and deed — and lie down on my stomach with my feet toward the headboard, propping my chin up on a pillow so I can keep watching the movie. Scully gets to work. 

And she’s good. Got those doctor hands. Whoever’s in 26 must think we’re making the world’s weirdest sex tape in here, or else that we’ve kidnapped a moose that sometimes converses with Cary Grant. 

By the time she gets to my feet, I feel like a melted marshmallow.  

Scully says dreamily, “I remember watching this once somewhere when I was about twelve, and thinking Eve Kendall was the coolest thing I’d ever seen.” I make an inquiring noise. “You know — this scene —”

They’re on the train. Eva Marie Saint’s lookin ol’ Archibald in the eye, telling him she’s twenty-six and unmarried and likes his face, how it’s gonna be a long night, and

“And I don't particularly like the book I've started,” Scully murmurs along. I crane my neck to look back at her; her lips curve upward in the most delicious-looking arc, her eyes twinkling with that sort of mischievous/impressed look she gets toward me sometimes. 

I love it, but it makes me a little jealous, so I tell her so. She just giggles and says, “Oh, don’t be jealous of old crushes!” I want to ask her who’s the crush, Eva Marie or Cary, but she grabs the other pillow and flops down on her stomach beside me and suddenly I can’t talk — I just lie there, grinning like a fool. 

She passes me the one-third-full Jameson’s — one more sip each before she caps it for the night. We watch for awhile longer. During the next commercial break, she turns to me, studying me with a gentle smile.  

“You look a little dopey,” she says fondly, and I laugh. 

“I’m also happy, sleepy, and tipsy — wonder where the other three dwarfs are?”

Her eyes are on the TV again. “Doc … Bashful … Horny …” 

Suddenly my heart is thumping way too hard. When I talk, it comes out softer than I meant it to. “I don’t think ‘Horny’ is one of the original septet, Doc …”

She shifts a little. She’s smiling but she won’t look at me. “Neither is ‘Tipsy,’ but I spotted you that one — fair’s fair, Mulder.”

“Oh, we’re being honest?” Where did this voice come from, the one that makes her shiver? There — just then — she did, she did shiver. I saw it. “Well, maybe there was a Horny. And a Woody, and a — Smitten, and a —”

“I think you better stop there, Prince Charming,” she interrupts, finally half-turning her face toward me. She still won’t make eye contact; maybe she knows, like I do, that if she does that, we don’t stand a chance of keeping this from happening. 

The thing is, I want it to. I have for a long, long time, and I think — so does she, so has she. 

That’s the source of so much of the tension between us; that’s really why we fought earlier, why there’ve been so many of these little flareups lately, embers dropped into dry grass and then stomped out with such vigor. We’ve been careful not to get into situations like this one, where the space separating us is so small that we can feel the other’s exhales on our own skin. 

I drop down from my elbows to lie flat, facing her. I can see her eyelashes silhouetted against the washed-out lights of 1959 onscreen. “Scully,” I say, barely above a whisper. 

It’s a long moment before she finally whispers back, “Not here.”

I know what she means, of course I do. Not on a case, not in a janky motel, not even a little bit under the influence. 

“Then where?” 

She shakes her head, a tiny movement that makes her hair fall forward, obscuring any part of her I could read. 

She doesn’t know? Or she doesn’t want to say? I can’t tell, so I try another question.

“Soon, do you think?”

She tenses, and for a second I think she’s going to get up, or order me out of here. But then she drops her head to the pillow, facing me. Her eyes are huge, serious, full of something unnameable that I nonetheless understand. 

“Soon,” she agrees. 

I nod, nearly overwhelmed by my love for her, the tremendous weight of this moment, the desire that’s been there for so long I don’t remember a time when it wasn’t. 

She reaches to touch my face, skimming lightly along one side, barely barely barely there on my eyelid, so softly; I close my eyes as she traces where she likes. 

Her hand falls eventually, coming to rest in the little valley between us. I take hold of it, gently, risking a glimpse at her. Her eyes are shut now, but I’m not sure she’s asleep. 

“I love you,” I say, but silently, the coward’s way. “So much.” 

If she hears me, it’s only subliminally; that’s all the daring I have tonight. Sweet dreams, Scully, I think as I drift off. Sweet dreams. 

--------------------------

[Thanks for the long-ago prompt, anon -- from the Fic Trope Mashup list, Massage Fic and In Vino Veritas]

[grahoria]

I'm Kidnapped by a Hot-Headed Superthief

I can’t sleep. It’s been a long day, and I’ve got another long day ahead of me tomorrow, but it’s like caffeine has been injected into my bloodstream. I don’t even feel tired.

Hunk is sound asleep, so I change into jeans and a t-shirt, grab my jacket, and head out for a walk.

There’s nowhere I want to be right now. I just wander around, letting my feet decide which way I go. When I finally look up, I’m passing the Sparrow Industries building. Which would be completely worth ignoring, if I didn’t also see the figure climbing out of a window three storeys up.

I’m moving before I fully realize what’s going on. My back slams against the wall, and I hold my breath. I’m witnessing a break-out. Or, since it’s pretty obvious whoever it is shouldn’t have been there to begin with, the end of a break-in.

I can hear his heavy breathing now. What should I do?

I don’t have time to think much more than that, because there’s a quiet thump, and then I’m bowled over by a figure wearing black and red. We hit the dirt in a tangle of limbs.

There’s a moment of silence save for distant sirens.

I manage to sit up a bit, and look directly into my attacker’s eyes. Behind his black mask, they’re wide and full of a mix of panic and determination.

Something flashes out of the corner of my eye. I glance away to see police cars pulling in. When I look back up at Mystery Guy, his eyes have narrowed.

The next thing I know, red fabric is wrapped around my head, I’m thrown over Mystery Guy’s shoulder like a sack of potatoes, and he takes off. I can’t reach my phone, so I just try not to fall off.

What follows is what I can only describe as a human rollercoaster. Mystery Guy changes directions a lot, stops and starts once or twice, and then starts going up instead of forward somehow. I’m this close to barfing when he finally stops and dumps me semi-gently onto the ground. The fabric is ripped off of my head.

I take a second to catch my breath, then get to my feet and look around. The first thing that hits me is that we’re standing on top of a building. The second is that my kidnapper, who has his back turned to me, is wearing a black unitard with red-lined gloves and boots, a utility belt, and a red hood.

I’ve been kidnapped by the notorious Wild Notion.

It takes a moment before I regain my voice. “What are you going to do to me?”

Wild Notion doesn’t look at me. He doesn’t answer either.

I try again. “Hello? Mr. Wild Notion? Are you going to murder me now?”

No answer.

“If you’re not going to stab me or drop me off the roof or anything, would you mind letting me go home? It’s a school night, and I really need to-”

“Shut up!” Wild Notion growls, whirling to face me. He’s got pale skin, and he sounds like John Wick, which would be super cool if he also didn’t look like he wanted to put scorpions in my bed.

“So you... are going to murder me?” I guess.

He makes a noise of irritation. “I don’t kill people.”

“Really? Because your face kind of looks like you’re going to kill me-”

“I’m starting to wish I did kill people.”

That shuts me up. I look out over the city. The Sparrow Industries building is still in sight, but I mainly see it because of all the flashing lights.

“Don’t try to get their attention,” Wild Notion says shortly. “They won’t hear you.”

“If you don’t want to draw attention, why are you wearing bright red?” I challenge before I can stop myself. Stupid big mouth, getting me into risky situations like this.

Wild Notion appears to be gritting his teeth. He turns away from me.

I don’t know how long we wait, but it feels like hours. The silence is finally broken when Wild Notion mutters, “Crap.”

“What?” I ask.

He’s scowling. “The Defenders’ll be here any minute. The next action we see could be Lady Light coming in for a landing.”

Right. Lady Light can fly. This could be my chance!

“So...” I take a few casual steps closer to the rampart. “If I wanted to escape, my best bet would be to-” NOW! I pour on the speed and leap over the rampart.

It only occurs to me as my feet leave the cement that Lady Light might not arrive in time to catch me.

The next instant, muscular arms wrap themselves around my middle and heave, sending me sprawling backward. I lie there, gasping for breath, while Wild Notion kneels beside me. “Are you CRAZY?” he shouts into my face. “You could have DIED!”

“No duh,” I manage.

This, shockingly, does nothing to calm him down. “Of all the STUPID, RECKLESS, IDIOTIC… YOU COULD BE A GREASE SPOT ON THE PAVEMENT RIGHT NOW!”

“Maybe that would be better than death by masked psychopath.” Why do I say things like this?

“I AM NOT GOING TO KILL YOU!”

“Right, because the yelling’s really selling your point.”

He growls at me - actually growls - and storms over to the rampart to keep an eye on the police situation.

Well then. Looks like I’ve been kidnapped by a real hothead. Maybe that’s why his hood is red. Or maybe he wants to look like a modern criminal vampire.

I’m suddenly struck by the irrational urge to take his picture. Or, at the very least, get a better look at him. Where is my phone?

I turn on the torch feature and lift my phone, just as he turns to face me.

I absolutely do not scream or almost drop the phone when his eyes glow bloodred.

“Turn that off!” he barks, raising a hand to block the light. I obey, but there is no way on this earth that I’m leaving myself in the dark with a pale, glowy-red-eyed criminal who can scale walls like the freaking Spider-Man. I leave my phone on, which he doesn’t seem to mind as much.

“Are you a vampire?” The words are out of my mouth before I can swallow them.

“No, I’m the Mothman,” Wild Notion says sarcastically. “You had a phone on you the whole time?”

That’s my cue to grip my phone with white-knuckle intensity. “I didn’t call anyone,” I say quickly.

Wild Notion gives me a narrow-eyed glare, then takes a few steps toward me. I take a few steps back, but not before realizing I’m taller than him by a few inches. Believe it or not, that actually makes me a bit less terrified for my life. “Give me that.”

“No,” I say, and pocket the phone.

He does the angry-growly thing again and turns his back on me. I’m starting to wonder if I’ve been kidnapped by the Beast from Beauty and the Beast.

“Crap.”

“What?” I ask.

“The Defenders are here.” Wild Notion turns and glares at me. “Stay put until I’m gone,” he orders.

I make a big production out of looking around me. “Right, because I’m going to take one of the millions of escape routes off the roof as soon as you’re not looking.”

“Stay. Put.” On that delightful note, Wild Notion hops up onto the rampart, then steps off into thin air.

What the heck?

I rush over to the rampart and look down. He’s sliding down the wall like it’s not completely vertical, cool as a cucumber. About ten feet from the ground, he pushes off the wall and lands lightly on his feet. Then he sprints off into the darkness and disappears.

Leaving me stuck on a roof in the middle of the night.

[unpack-my-heart]

IT Fandom Prompt Week - Day 7 - Famous / Band AU

@constantreaderfool​ @xandertheundead​ @tinyarmedtrex​

Final Prompt for IT Prompt week 2019. 

Read on AO3 HERE

Like many people, the first metal band that Eddie listened to was Metallica. He was 16, and had spent the day at Bev’s house, the balmy evening sun hanging heavy and bloated in the sky. They’d sat at the bottom of her garden, legs bare and grass between their toes. Bev’s old cassette tape player was balanced precariously on a rickety wooden chair, the tapes lay scattered around the grass, like plastic flowers. Eye’s half-closed, Eddie was listening to Bev tell him about the book she’d been reading, and how he should read it before they start their college degrees in the fall. Bev’s voice, pitchy and animated, fought with Morrissey’s crooning voice, and Eddie let himself swim in the noise. That was, until Bev changed the tape, and an unrelenting guitar riff came booming out of the tinny speakers. Eddie’s eyes snapped open.

“Who’s this?” Eddie asked, shifting so he was propped up against the fence.

“Huh? Oh, Metallica. They’re pretty good, right!”

“Yeah,” Eddie mused, bobbing his head slightly along with the rhythmic chugging of the guitar, “yeah they’re pretty good”

That night, Eddie had practically skipped home, fanny-pack stuffed with as many cassette tapes as Bev could wedge in there without breaking the zip. The bands are those he has never heard of before, Black Sabbath, Judas Priest, Nine Inch Nails. Bev promised that he’ll love them, and he trusted her.

A few days later, Eddie escaped the stifling confines of his mother’s house to join Bev on a trip to the local record store. Bev immediately tugged him over to the ‘rock and metal’ section, where they spent ages flicking through the tapes, Bev filling Eddie’s hands with tapes in a matter of minutes. Eddie, who had felt out of place in a dingy record store in his pressed khakis and pastel yellow polo shirt, had immediately struck up a conversation with the friendly guy behind the counter, who couldn’t have been any older than he was.

“First time?” The guy asked, picking through the tapes that Eddie had dumped on the counter, looking for the price stickers.

“Pardon?”  

“First time somewhere like this? You have the first time kinda look, like you’re afraid the tapes will bite you or something”

“Oh,” Eddie replied, scuffing his feet on the floor, “Yeah, it’s my first time. Bev said she’d been in here loads and it’s cheaper than the store downtown, so…”

The guy laughed, a warm laugh that rang in the quiet store like a bell.

“Yeah, Bev’s in here a lot. Doesn’t spend much money, though !”

“Bite me, Hanlon”

“Ever the charmer, Miss Marsh,” The guy turned back to Eddie, “As rude as she is, Bev has good taste. You’re definitely in safe hands, but you can always come in here and I can help you, if you get sick of her forcing you to listen to Trent Reznor’s entire discography over and over and over again”

“I’m warning you, Michael!” Bev hollered, brandishing a vinyl record like a weapon.

– X –

Soon enough, Eddie fell into a routine. He’d wait until his mother fell into a deep, sleeping-pill induced sleep in front of her soap operas, and shut the lounge room door, painfully slowly to stop it creaking. Then, he’d charge upstairs as fast as his legs would carry him. Whilst Eddie looked everything the picture-perfect poster-boy for “good boys” everywhere, from his perfectly coiffed hair, his crisp, 100% cotton polo shirts, and even down to his sensible, chalk-white sketchers,  he had a secret hiding under his bed.

Under his bed, behind the stacks of biology and chemistry textbooks and old shoes that don’t fit him anymore, lurks a small metal box, and a rusty cassette player. The metal box is home to his ever expanding collection of tapes, and he’d take great pleasure in passing his fingers over the spines of the cases, like he was choosing the biggest, most decadent chocolate in the box. His fingers almost always landed on Metallica first, his gate-way drug. He’d disrobe the tape, and place it into the cassette player, but not before he’d plugged his monstrously large headphones into the jack. Cranking up the volume, Eddie would place the cassette player next to him on the bed, and lie back, and drift.

Master of puppets I'm pulling your strings Twisting your mind and smashing your dreams Blinded by me, you can't see a thing

Eddie would spend hours listening to Rob Halford’s demonic screaming if his mother had been particularly taxing that evening, or if his day had been slow and lazy, Ozzy Osborne would sing him to sleep, regaling him with tales of faeries dancing with dwarves. Soon enough, and without any real effort, Eddie became a secret, but die-hard, metal-head.

– X –

A note hit the back of Eddie’s head in chemistry.

Anthrax are playing at oil slick in Bangor! We gotta go. B x

Eddie tries to protest, he really does. He sits under the bleachers with Bev at lunch, and tries to convince her that he’d never be allowed to go to a show in Bangor, that his mother would never let him, that he can’t lie to her, really Bev, I’ve tried, I’m a terrible liar.

She doesn’t take no for an answer, and sure enough, when the night of the show arrives, Eddie is sat in his bedroom at half past six, practically vibrating with nerves. He knew that his mother would be dead to the world in a few minutes, passed out for a whole twelve hours. Eddie thanked the God of Nyquil and prescription medicine. When the familiar rumble of his mother’s snores starts to seep through his floorboards, Eddie throws open his window, takes a deep breath, and leaps like a frog onto the branch of the big tree that stands dormant outside his window.

He runs straight to Bev’s aunts house, and they both clamber in her rickety Sedan, Bev, who had recently turned 17 and was now trusted with her Aunt’s car, at the wheel. Eddie was wearing the black straight-leg jeans he’d begged his mother to buy him, and Beverly Marsh, his lord and saviour, had lent him one of her old leather jackets and her Iron Maiden tour shirt that fit him like a glove. Together with Bev clad in enough leather to upholster a couch, they drove to Bangor.

Eddie had the best night of his life, and crawled back in through his bedroom window at four am the next morning, sweaty and disgusting, but happier than he’d been in years.

– X –

When Bev’s aunt gets a PR job at Iron Horns, the best heavy metal festival this side of the Atlantic, Eddie almost squeezes the life out of Bev when she invites him to go with them. He was eighteen, and on the precipice of adulthood. He’s staring down the crevasse of responsibility, college degrees, mortgages and student loan repayments, and the void is staring straight back at him. He toyed with the idea of telling his mother that her little Eddie-Bear spends his weekends lurking in dive bars listening to boys with longer hair than most girls scream into the microphone, and he plans on getting dirty in a field for a weekend with his best friend.

He, of course, doesn’t do this, and instead told his mother that Bill and Ben have invited him to go camping with them, and he wanted to go. Predictably, she wasn’t happy, and bleated on at him about bears and poison ivy until she was blue in the face and panting, but she couldn’t catch Eddie as he sprinted down the path, backpack bulging on his back, pop-up tent in hand.

Iron Horn’s was huge. The site was a sprawling sea of grass, tents and stages, and as they drove down the make-shift drive-way to the staff car-park, Eddie could feel himself begin to panic. His hand instinctively tried to find the inhaler he has stashed in his fanny-pack, but Bev’s hand caught his hand in hers and squeezed. They held hands until they got out of the car.

Bev’s Aunt Lucy was ‘head of logistics’ for the entire festival, something that makes Eddie gawp with awe, and because she was such an important cog in the machine of the festival, they had arrived one day before the music started. Lucy was also able to throw her weight around a bit and swing them a camping plot in the staff and VIP section of the festival, something that calmed Eddie’s nervous jitters. The staff camping had a regular block of toilets, so he wouldn’t have to venture into alien territory … the dreaded porta-loo.

The staff camping ground is made up of plots of grass for people to pitch tents, but it also had porta-cabins for the musicians. Eddie scanned the names on the doors, finding that he recognises all but one of the bands.

“Bev, who are Crimson Nightmare?” Eddie asked Bev, trying to help her pitch their tent, but mostly just getting in her way.

“Huh. I have no idea, but they’re headlining the second day so I guess they’re probably pretty good”  Bev huffed, trying to bash the tent-pegs into the firm ground with the heel of her boot.

Once they (or rather, Bev) had finished pitching their tent, they both clambered inside with their bags, and proceeded to get changed out of their travelling clothes. Most of the clothes that Eddie has brought with him are Bev’s hand-me-downs, or things that she’s bought him for Christmas, or just because. Eddie changes into one of Bev’s ripped Judas Priest shirts, and a pair of her tightest black skinny jeans that just about fit him if he doesn’t breathe too deeply. Luckily, because Bev’s feet are the size of common shrews, Eddie has his own boots that he’d saved up for with money from various birthday’s. Obviously he can’t keep the boots at home because his mother would find them and burn them in a sacrifice to the God’s of easy listening music, so they live in the trunk of Bev’s Aunt’s car for him to change into when they go to shows. They’re beaten up old black Docs that he bought in a thrift shop. He swapped out the characteristic yellow laces for rainbow ones, and he let Bill draw dancing skeletons on them in white sharpie. Eddie treasured those damn boots.

Once they’re changed, Eddie and Bev head over to the VIP tent where they grab some food. The VIP tent was home to a catering service, and a small bar for the staff and the musicians to wind down in the evening. Upon walking through the entrance flap, Eddie was immediately star-struck. There are people from his favourite bands milling around, talking to each other, laughing, shouting, existing. As he looked around, Eddie realised that no-one else looked quite as starstruck as he did, which made him feel all sorts of ridiculous, but he couldn’t help it. He continued to stare at Layne Staley.

Once Eddie and Bev had finished their food, and Eddie was trying not to stare at the lead singer from Steel Martyr too much, he caught the eye of a tall guy with intense dark eyes and a wicked smile leaning nonchalantly against the bar. Eddie doesn’t recognise him, so he assumed that he must be a light tech, or an audio engineer, or maybe even a roadie. He also looks very young, perhaps no older than nineteen. This, accompanied with the fact that he’s wearing sweatpants with an old hoodie, suggested to Eddie that he couldn’t be a member of a metal band. The guy held Eddie’s gaze for a beat too long, and before he glanced back to the bartender, the stranger winked at Eddie.

Against his will, Eddie felt the all too familiar heat in his cheeks – an unfortunate indication that his face was blooming a violent scarlet red. Eddie snapped his head away, eliciting an loud bark of laughter from the stranger at the bar. Bev, who had been too busy trying to surreptitiously roll a joint under the table, looks up when she heard the laugh.

“Eddie, why is that guy over there staring at you?”

“…Wuh-What?,” Eddie stutters, fertilizing the glint in Bev’s eye, “What guy? There’s no guy”

“Uh… Yeah there is, that one” Bev snorts, and turned in her seat to point directly at the stranger, who waved at her.

“Him? What about him? I don’t even know him” Eddie mumbled, staring very intently at an interesting speck of dirt on the floor.

“Well, he’s been staring at you since we got here, he laughed at you about thirty seconds ago, and now he’s coming over here”

“WHAT!”

“Yeah, he’s totally coming over here!” Bev squealed, looking positively gleeful.

Eddie snapped his head up, and sure enough, the stranger in the sweatpants was striding over purposefully, his eyes glued on Eddie.

Eddie stared back at him, eyes owlish and ridiculous.

“I guess I’m gonna have to make the first move, then?” was the first thing the sweatpants-stranger said, as he plonked himself down in the empty seat to Eddie’s right.

“Um” was all Eddie said in response.

Bev was thirty seconds away from howling with laughter judging by the look on her face, and Eddie prayed that embarrassment was a painless way to die.

“Hi! I’m Bev, and this beetroot looking thing here is Eddie”

“Nice to meetcha, Red. The name’s Richie. D’ya have a voice, short-stack?”

“I do as it happens” Eddie replied, snottily.

“Oof. I like ‘em spicy. Come here often?”

“Do you speak only in pick-up lines or are you capable of stringing a coherent sentence together?”

“Get yer coat love, you’ve pulled”

Eddie rolled his eyes, and angled his body away from Richie’s.

He knew what this game was, and he intended to play to win.

“Hey now, I’m just playing with you” Richie cooed, taking Eddie’s bait, “In all seriousness, whatcha doing here? You performing this weekend?”

“Naw, my Aunt is the head of logistics for the fest so we came along for the ride. Couldn’t pass up the opportunity to see Tool for the fifth time!” Bev responded, speaking for Eddie, who raised his eyebrows at her gratefully.

“Ah, of course. Gotta admit, I’m pretty heartbroken I’m not gonna get to see little Eddie Spaghetti losing his shit on that big stage, though. I bet that’s a real pretty sight”

“And what are you doing here, then? Light tech, or something?” Eddie interjected, a feeble attempt to steer the conversation away from himself.

“Something like that. A bitta’ this, a bitta’ that. Jack of all trades, me”

Eddie wasn’t entirely satisfied with that answer, but he didn’t push it any further.

“Can I get you both a drink?” Richie asked, drawing Eddie out of his introspection.

“Are you over twenty-one?” Eddie affirmed, sceptical.

“Nah, but I’ve known Jonsey for a few years now. He’s not worried about silly little things like legal drinking ages”

“Uh ..,” Eddie looked at Bev for confirmation, and much to his chagrin Bev gave him the most ridiculous, and most unsubtle thumbs up ever.

“Okay, sure,” Eddie relents, “just get me whatever you’re having”

“Are you sure you can handle that?” Richard said with a wink. Eddie stared at the floor again, eyes wandering over Richie’s boots. The laces were not proper laces at all, and were instead blue string, frayed and threadbare.

“I’ll have a jack and coke, if you’d be so kind. Lotta Jack, not so much coke” Bev asks, smiling up at Richie.

“That’s a lot of booze for a young lady like yourself” Richie drawled in something Eddie supposed was supposed to be a southern accent.

“Bite me”

“If you’re sure”

Eddie sort of expected Bev to tell Richie to fuck off, but she doesn’t. She did something much more surprising.

“Hey Eddie, why don’t you go and help Richie carry the drinks? I’m just gonna –“ she gestures to the opening of the tent and waggles the spliff between her fingers.

“Aw, man. I’m hitting on the wrong person here. Any chance of a do-over, Red?”

“Not a fuckin’ chance, Trashmouth. I’ll be back in a few, Eddie, go help with the drinks!” Bev says again, a little bit more insistent this time.

“What a marvellous idea! Come on, Spaghetti” Richie announced, sending a look towards Bev that Eddie didn’t understand.

Eddie stood up, wordless, and followed Richie towards the bar, but not before sending a silent “what the fuck?!” Bev’s way. She just smiled at him, stuck her thumbs up, and disappeared out of the tent.

Eddie waited at the bar with Richie, who was drumming out the beat of a song that Eddie doesn’t recognise on the polished wood.

“Bev has a girlfriend, you know,” Eddie blurted out before he could stop himself, “just so you, y’know … know”

“Does she? That’s nice. Now, do you have a boytoy, Mr Eds?”

“but … aren’t you trying to hit on her?”

“Uh, I’m definitely trying to hit on someone, but it ain’t Red”

“Then … who …”

Richie looked at Eddie square in the face with epitome of are you shitting me written across his face.

“…oh”

“Yeah, Oh” Richie mocked, laughing. Eddie couldn’t help but notice that his eyes were glittering despite the low light of the tent.

Unsure of what to say, Eddie remained silent for a few beats too long, but he was saved when the bartender came over to take their order. Richie orders Bev’s drink, before also ordering two pints of hard cider, one of which he passes to Eddie.

“So, to return to our previous conversation, is there a Mrs Eddie Spaghetti waiting for you at home?”

“Okay, you gotta stop with all this spaghetti stuff. It’s just Eddie”

“Sure. Is there a Mrs Just-Eddie waiting for you at home?”

“Wait – hang on. How did you even know I like men?”

“Lucky guess” Richie boasted, waggling his eyebrows.

Eddie stared at him until Richie burst out laughing.

“No, Seriously! It was a lucky guess. I was fully prepared for you to tell me that Red was your girl and that I’d have to slink off with my tail in between my legs”

“Bev will find that hilarious when I tell her that”

“C’mon, S’getti you’re killing me,” Richie groaned, “should I persist in my pathetic attempts to woo you or am I wasting my time?”

Eddie pretended to think, and rubbed his chin with the hand that wasn’t holding his cider.

“I’m not sure I wanna tell you, yet. I’m quite enjoying watching you squirm”

“You sadist” Richie shot back immediately.

Eddie stood up on his tiptoes and whispered, “you don’t know the half of it” directly into the shell of Richie’s ear, before he swiftly turned on his heel and slinked back to the table.

“I’m taking that as a ‘Yes, Richie, please continue trying to get into my pants!’” Richie yelled after him.

Eddie threw his head back, and laughed.

– X –

When they got back to their tent that evening after staggering back across the field, Bev and Eddie collapsed onto the same tiny air mattress and curled around each other like inebriated kittens.

“Sooooo?” Bev drawled, as she tried to pull her boots off without unlacing them first.

“Whazzit? What?”

“Richie? D’ya like him? Because I’m pretty sure he’s gone all kissy-kissy-mushy-mushy over a certain little spaghetttiiiiii”

“oh m’god, shut’p,” Eddie slurred, and he tried to hit Bev on the arm but missed by a good six inches, “he’s just … uh … flirtatious”

“Naw, Eddie, he’s desperate to, y’know, get in there!” Bev laughed hysterically, as she pointed at Eddie’s crotch.

Eddie rolled his eyes, at least he thought he did, he’s definitely too drunk to tell.

“C’mere, tiny, I wanna spooooon” Bev moaned, grabbing Eddie.

They both fell asleep almost instantly after that, Bev’s arm wrapped snugly around Eddie’s waist.

– X –

The next morning Eddie woke up with a mouth that tasted like he’d gargled with white spirit, and, surprisingly, no headache and a stomach that only felt a tiny bit like a whirlpool.

Bev, on the other hand, wailed like a banshee when Eddie shifted on the air mattress to open the tent flap, letting a stream of cool air into the tent.

“Edward, I will cut off you bollocks if you let any more light in”

Eddie slipped out of the tent, leaving Bev to her hangover. The sun was already high in the sky, and Eddie guessed it couldn’t have been earlier than eleven or midday. His mother would definitely never have let him sleep in this late. The music started today, the first band taking to the main stage at 3pm. There seemed to be more people than Eddie had ever seen in his life charging around the staff camping grounds, carrying various bits of rigging, instruments and electrical equipment. Eddie sat on the grass outside his tent, trying to psyche himself up enough to make the long, arduous 500 metre walk to the bathrooms to brush his teeth, when a large hand clamped on his shoulder. Eddie barely managed to suppress his scream.

“Howdy, neighbour!”

“Oh my God, it’s you”

“That isn’t a very nice way to greet your beloved now is it, Eddie?”

“I thought I’d dreamt you up in an alcohol-induced fever dream” Eddie deadpanned as Richie all but threw himself down on the grass next to him.

“Naw,” was all Richie said, closing his eyes against the light of the sun. Eddie swore he could see the freckles scattered across the bridge of Richie’s nose multiply in front of his eyes.

They sat without talking for a while, listening to the hustle and bustle of the campsite. Richie looked exhausted, and Eddie wanted to let Richie rest his head in his lap while he stroked Richie’s wild hair until he was snoring.

“So … plan on seeing any good bands today?” Eddie asked awkwardly, consciously aware of the fact that the Dutch courage previously coursing through his veins had evaporated overnight.

“I dunno, yet. Who are you going to see?”

“Bev wants to see Def Leppard, who I’m not majorly fussed about, but I have to go see ‘em if she’ll even think about coming with me to see Kiss”

“Where is Red this morning, anyway? Is that … is that tent of yours empty?”

“She’s still asleep”

“Cockblock” Richie cursed under his breath, just loud enough for Eddie to hear it.

“You’re very presumptuous, has anyone ever told you that?”

“Believe it or not, I don’t make a habit of this” Richie replied, with a serious edge to his voice.

Eddie blinked.

“Make a habit of what?” Eddie asked, dumbly.

“This,” Richie gestured to Eddie and then back to himself and repeated the action, “I’m not … I don’t do this stuff”

“Richie, I’m confused”

“Never mind, sugar. I’ll explain it to you when you’re older”

Before Eddie could protest that he wanted Richie to explain his cryptic message now and not later, a rather dishevelled and grumpy looking Bev poked her head out of the tent.

“Okay. One, Eddie, I love you but you are so dense that light bends around you. Two, can you guys go flirt somewhere else please, it’s making my stomach churn”

“Top o’the mornin’ to ya, lassie!” Richie bellowed in an awful Irish accent, shuffling closer to Eddie to allow Bev more space to clamber out of the tent.

Bev collapsed on the grass next to them, rubbing her head.

“Do you have any painkillers in that magic fanny-pack of yours?” She asked Eddie, a pitiful twang to her voice.

Eddie nodded, and climbed back into the tent to search for the fanny-pack. When he’d grabbed it and climbed back out of the tent, Bev and Richie were sitting close, heads together, whispering frantically about something that Eddie couldn’t hear. Bev’s face was stern, like she was scolding a small child who had broken her favourite mug, and Richie’s eyebrows looked very insistent, but also vaguely scared. They sprang apart when Eddie climbed back out of the tent, painkillers in one hand and a bottle of water in the other. He passed both items to Bev, who hoovered up two painkillers quicker than Eddie could blink.

“I gotta skedaddle now, my love. Promise you’ll stay faithful as you wait for me,” Richie announced as he stood up, and brushed stray blades of grass off his jeans.

“I won’t make a promise I can’t keep, Rich,” Eddie tried to joke, but it fell flat as Richie’s smile, only for the briefest of seconds, was replaced by a mask of hurt.

“I guess I’ll see you around then,” and with that, Richie sauntered off, hands shoved deep in his pockets, head hanging uncharacteristically low.

“Eddie, what I need you to do right now, is go after him and apologise for being a dick”

“What did I do?!”

“You know exactly what you did”

Eddie did know.

The truth was, Eddie was harbouring a crush on Richie that was growing exponentially. He’d spotted him immediately as they’d walked into the VIP tent the day before. His heart had thumped wildly the entire time they sat close together, drinking cider and laughing, and he’d almost vomited every time Richie’s arm brushed his. Eddie had it bad. He knew this. But, try as he might, something kept him from entirely letting go. Something about the fact they’d met at a festival, miles and miles away from Eddie’s home town, and they’d probably never see each other again. He’d never experimented with casual sex, a nice fuck and a see you never! arrangement. He’d never given it much thought. Maybe he should.

Without another word, Eddie sprung up and chased after Richie, who was now rounding the corner by the toilet block.

“Rich!” Eddie called out, panting.

Richie turned around, and beamed at Eddie.

Eddie felt lighter.

“I’m sorry I’m a dick”

“You’re not a dick”

“I am, and I’m sorry. Do you … I dunno, do you wanna come see Def Leppard with us later, maybe? I mean – you don’t have to, I just meant if you have nothing better to –”

“I’d love to”

– X –

“POUR SOME SUGAR ON ME!” Eddie screamed along with Joe Elliott, thousands of other people, and Richie.

Bev had disappeared a few songs ago, pushing her way to the front barrier, but Eddie had hung back. He was stood directly in front of Richie, who had been whispering (or, more accurately, shouting) into his ear occasionally, and even in one delicious, ridiculous moment, picked Eddie up and stuck him on his shoulders. That didn’t last long because Eddie was terrified he’d fall off, but having his thighs wrapped around Richie’s neck was exhilarating for the four minutes it lasted.

“Eds, this might be the best day of my life,” Richie shouted, hot, moist breath tickling Eddie’s ear.

“I think me too!” Eddie shouted back, and the Richie did something that made Eddie’s brain shortcircuit.

Richie wrapped his arms around Eddie’s waist, crossing them over his stomach, and placed a large, wet-sounding kiss on the top of Eddie’s head.

Eddie didn’t dare blink, breathe, move or think.

“Thank you for inviting me” Richie whispered, and it was a real whisper this time, spoken directly into Eddie’s heart.

“it’s uh – no problem”

The band ripped into a cover of The Who’s ‘My Generation’, and much to Eddie’s annoyance, Richie released Eddie from his cobra-hold and tugged him forward, forward, forward until they ran into Bev at the barrier. Bev’s long orange hair was piled on top of her head, her face was sweaty and pink, and she looked absolutely radiant.

“This is our fucking song now!” Richie bellowed, hoisting Bev up on his shoulders like he had done to Eddie a few songs earlier.

Eddie grabbed Bev’s ankle and squeezed it. She smiled down at him, all teeth and tongue and happy, happy, happy.

– X –

The sun had fully set behind the massive stage, and Def Leppard had just finished their encore. The mass of people that had been surrounding Eddie, a coagulated mass of shadows and sharp elbows, parted like red sea as people slowly started to trickle out of the main arena and back towards the campsites. As they walked, shoulders bumping together occasionally, Eddie noticed several people staring at Richie, or pointing at him and whispering. Eddie glanced up at Richie to see if he’d noticed, only to find Richie looking down at him with soft eyes and a small, but genuine, smile.

“You okay, Eds?”

“Yeah, yeah I’m fucking great, Rich. I wasn’t expecting to enjoy it as much as I did”

“Ah, that’s because I was there, obviously” Richie boasted.

Eddie could tell that he was joking, that he was just playing the game they’d been playing for the past twenty-four hours, but that didn’t stop Eddie from saying “yeah, it probably was”, as honest as the day is long.

Eddie’s honesty seemed to hit Richie in the stomach like a sucker punch, because he made this weird spluttering noise.

“Fucking hell, Sugar, you can’t just say stuff like that”

“Why?”

“Because – Never mind, I’m gonna walk you back to your tent, c’mon”

Eddie stopped walking, and tugged on Richie’s arm to get him to stop too. Richie swung around so he was facing Eddie, boot toe to boot toe.

“Richie, what’s wrong?”

“I don’t think I can do this anymore, Eddie”

“Do what?”

“I can’t just keep this up. I can’t keep fucking – fucking dancing with you, laughing with you, letting you smile at me like that, and then when you cuddled with me during the show I was like, ‘oh my God, this is it, he does feel the same’  but then … then you go all cold on me or you glare at me or …” Richie trailed off, his eyes flickered between Eddie’s eyes and mouth.

“Richie, I – ”

“Please don’t, please don’t pity me or say you’re sorry, or anything like that. God, I’ll drop down dead if you say you’re sorry, Eds. It isn’t your fault, it’s mine. I wasn’t joking about walking you back, though, c’mon, Bev will kill me if we’re back much later than – ”

Richie stopped talking because Eddie had kissed him.

Eddie curled his hand around Richie’s neck and dragged his face down, before he smashed his lips to Richie’s in a kiss that started off almost violent in its awkwardness but soon became soft and hesitant. Richie didn’t move at first, and Eddie almost pulled away, ready to sprint off to the campsite fuelled on nothing but mortal embarrassment, but just as Eddie had pulled his lips a millimetre away from Richie’s, Richie opened his mouth slightly, just barely, and kissed Eddie back.

They kissed, Richie’s hands cradling Eddie’s face, until someone came careening into Eddie’s back, sending him flying forwards into Richie’s chest, arms flailing wildly.

“Sorry, mate!”

“No problem, bro” Richie responded, voice low and gruff, and from his position squished up against Richie’s chest, Eddie laughed, poking at the soft flesh of Richie’s tummy with his index finger.

“Bro?” Eddie mocked.

“What?”

“You’re ridiculous”

“And yet, you kissed me”

“I did”

“So that makes you ridiculous as well”

“It does”

“Wanna do it again?”

“Yes”

This time, Richie kissed Eddie.

– X –

By the time they’d gotten back to the tent, Eddie wasn’t done with Richie. Not even close. They’d stopped a few times on the way back, mostly Richie cutting Eddie off with his tongue, or one time that Eddie got so frustrated with Richie doing that he shoved him up against a tree and kissed him until Richie couldn’t breathe. It still wasn’t enough. However, Eddie didn’t know how to ask for more, how to ask Richie to climb into his tent with him.

Bev wasn’t in the tent when Eddie poked his head in, but there was a note lying on the air mattress.

With my mom tonight, wanted to give you some space WINK WINK

Love you be safe I’ll kick his ass if he hurts you

Don’t show his this note

Or you can if you want

Richard I’ll kill you if you hurt him okay

Love you love you love you

Eddie loved Beverly so much he could scream.

“Uh… are you tired yet?” Eddie asked, trying to remain inconspicuous, but subtlety was never his strong point.

“Nope” Richie responded, popping the ‘P’.

“Do you wanna, come in? I can’t offer you coffee because … well, I don’t have any way of making any but I can offer you … lukewarm water?”

“Eds?”

“Yeah?”

“Cut the shit”

Richie all but threw himself through the entrance of the tent, pouncing on Eddie with a loud ‘oof’. They both sprawled backwards, and Richie hovered over Eddie, his eyes dark.

“Are you sure?”

“More sure than I’ve been of anything for a very long time”

“Do you have … the necessarily equipment?”

“Are you talking about whether or not I have a dick? Because …” Eddie gestured to his crotch where, yes, it was very obvious that he was packing heat, thank you very much.

“No, you goof, I meant lube and stuff”

“Oh… yeah I do, hang on”

“You’re very … prepared”

“Jealous?”

“I would be if it wasn’t me in this tent with you right now”

“Well it is, so shut up and kiss me”

– X –

The next morning, Eddie had woken up with a crick in his neck. Richie had gone. What lay on the pillow where Richie’s head should have been, was Bev’s note. Or, rather, another note, scrawled on the back of Bev’s note.

Please get as close to the barrier as possible during Crimson Nightmare’s set

Please please please please

You fuckin’ rocked my world last night Eds

R x

– X –

Eddie looked behind him at the pulsing mass of people, blurring into one lacquered mass in the darkness of the night, random faces illuminated by the spotlights. Raucous chants surrounded him, a war cry, “CRIMSON NIGHTMARE! CRIMSON NIGHTMARE! CRIMSON NIGHTMARE!”. It was cultish, and Eddie could feel himself becoming indoctrinated.

Without warning, the huge fluttering black cloth that had been obscuring the stage was sucked through a gap in the ceiling, and revealed the stage. The entire set was decked out to look like an industrial hellscape, all juddering fans, sharp looking pieces of metal jutting every which way and large metal platforms. Several huge industrial fans were stood in the centre of the stage, acting as a podium for an obscenely large drumkit. Eddie hardly noticed the stage, though, as he was preoccupied with looking at the elaborate venetian masks the band were wearing. They obscured almost their entire faces, and looked like they were made of a buttery-soft leather with horns curling skywards. The bassist was stood on a large piece of scaffolding stage right, and the lead guitarist was standing on the floor surrounded by shards of metal poking out of the floor stage left. The screams and hollers of the crowd grew deafening, and the guitarist ripped straight into a blistering riff that sounded like it’d been spat from the mouth of the devil himself. A scream tore its way out of Eddie’s body, and he began jumping up and down with the crowd, coagulating until he had become One with the throbbing mass of people.

Like Richie’s note had said, Eddie was right at the barrier. His ribs were being crushed against the hard metal every time he leapt up and down, but he hardly noticed it once the vocalist walked out onto stage. The vocalist walked with a swagger that punched Eddie straight in the gut, and before they had even managed to spit out a single syllable, Eddie almost collapsed on the floor. He was held up by Bev, who shot him a questioning look. Eddie didn’t dare speak, move, breath, blink.

“Aw man, look at you see of sexy bitches come all this way to see little old me?” the vocalist brayed, stamping his feet in time with the rhythmic booming of the bass drum.

The crowd roared back in response. Eddie couldn’t breathe.

The vocalist was wearing the same mask as the rest of his bandmates, but that didn’t matter.

“All this noise for me? Too fuckin’ bad I’m gonna make your ears fucking bleeeeeed. This one’s called ‘You’ll Float Too’ and you’re gonna fucking love it” Richie yelled, before screaming like a banshee and launching into the first song.

It was Richie.

It was Richie’s voice.

It was Richie’s voice, Richie’s raspy growl, Richie’s beaten up old boots.

The frontman of the last headliner of Iron Horns was the guy that Eddie had ridden on his shitty little air mattress in his shitty little tent the night before.

Eddie tapped Bev on the shoulder, and soon the taps became almighty whacks when she wouldn’t turn around, but when she did, Eddie knew that she knew.

“IS THAT?!”

“IT IS!”

“FUCKING HELL”

“I KNOW”

Richie paraded up and down the stage, the big black coat he was wearing flapping in the breeze of the industrial fans. Eddie was mesmerised by the way Richie made screaming into the microphone with such tenacity look easy, and the way that Richie leapt around the stage effortlessly. The crowd were screaming, and a pit opened up directly behind Eddie, who clung to the barrier, knuckles bright white, to avoid getting sucked into its depths. Bev, as she always did, disappeared into the centre of the hurricane, and was spat out again several minutes later, eyes gleaming, hair tousled.

– X –

Half way through their last song, Richie locked eyes with Eddie.

Eddie hadn’t been sure that Richie had seen him there, a fleck of sand on the beach, faceless amongst the crowd. But, half way through ‘No Dread, No Desire’, Richie’s eyes locked with his. Of course, Eddie initially thought that Richie could have just so happened to have been staring in his general direction, but when Richie practically ran to the spot directly in front of where Eddie was standing, all doubts dissolved. Richie dropped to his knees and belted the rest of the song directly at Eddie, who needed Bev to hold him up once more.

– X –

Even after Richie had sung the last note of the encore, and bid the crowd farewell, Eddie couldn’t move. He was glued to the spot, practically growing roots. Bev stood next to him, saying nothing, just breathing, loud and heavy breaths curling into the black sky like smoke.

“So”

“So”

“Richie’s in a band”

“Richie’s in … a fucking good band”

“You slept with him”

“I did”

“You slept with a guy in a band”

“I did”

“Are you a groupie now?”

“Fuck off”

A figure appeared on stage, and shuffled towards them. A figure wearing sweatpants and boots with laces that weren’t real laces, but were instead blue, frayed string.  

The figure crouched in front of them.

“Did you like the set?”

“You’re fucking famous” Eddie blurted out, tongue thick and fat in his mouth.

“M’not, not really. The vocalist of Crimson Nightmare is kinda famous, but he’s … he’s not really me. M’just Richie”

“But … Aren’t you the vocalist?”

“Well, yes, I mean technically, but I wear that mask n’ all so… It’s also sort of, not me?”

“Richie I have no idea what to say, I’m like … I’m fucking shaking”

“Good shaking? Bad shaking? Did you hate it? That growl in the third song came out so fucking janky, and I know that I sounded kinda flat in a few of the songs but –“

“You were … spectacular” Eddie breathed, and stared up at Richie with wide, earnest eyes.

“Aw, shit. You’re gonna make me blush, Eddie Spaghetti”

Richie hopped down off the stage, crowding into Eddie’s space. They were separated by a thin metal fence. It was too much distance.

“Beverly, if you don’t want to watch me shove my tongue down Eddie’s throat, I suggest that you avert your eyes, otherwise, enjoy the fuckin’ show”

Bev’s indignant squawk was drowned out by the all-consuming taste on Eddie’s tongue.

– X –

From: Sugar Daddy:

[youtube link]

From: Sugar Daddy:

Last night in Denver. I think you’ll like it <3

Eddie opened the link. It was a video of Crimson Nightmare headlining a spot at Denver arena. The camera was shaky, and the audio screechy, but it was clear enough so Eddie could hear everything Richie was saying.

“Alright, alright, now, I know this is gonna come as a fuckin’ surprise to some of you, or maybe it won’t, but I dedicate this next song to the boy who inspired it. Eddie Spaghetti, this one’s for you, my love, my one, my only”

Screeching guitar and guttural screams filtered out of the shitty speakers of Eddie’s phone. Eddie lay back on his bed, closed his eyes, and drifted.

To: Sugar Daddy:

I love you

[angelinwhy]

Never Going Back

Description: Y/N leaves her abusive boyfriend, covered in bruises and cuts, and goes to her best friends house - Harry. He cleans her up, and looks after her.

Warnings: mentions of abuse!

It hadn’t always been that way.

Y/N hadn’t always lived her life in complete fear that she could be hurt at any given moment. She used to be so carefree, so happy and bubbly. A true beacon of happiness that beamed everywhere she went. She travelled a lot and found new places, and in those places she found happiness. For most, finding good things in bad situations was like a needle in a bloody haystack - not for Y/N. It was like a hidden talent.

But it all changed when she met her boyfriend, of two years, Jake. He was good to her at the start, like really good. They were a model couple for every other couple on the planet. Always hosting dinners for their friends, spending every given day with each other, always smiling and always laughing. Sure, they had arguments, and got over them within a few days. But didn’t every other couple? Jake was a lad, in honesty. He had his reputation on the streets for being a man who slept about a lot (a man-slag basically) and just dumped the girls the day after. That stopped when he met Y/N though, as she completely grounded him. Made him a different person, but over time, things had started to change, and it wasn’t the best change.

It had all started during an argument one nice. Jake wasn’t one to be insecure about things, but when it came to the megastar Harry Styles, who happened to be Y/N’s best friend of 5 years, that was his deepest insecurity.

He wasn’t insecure because he wanted to be like him.

No.

Jake was insecure because of his friendship with Y/N and the ‘alarming amount of time they spent with one another’. He always thought that something was going on whenever Y/N went to see Harry, because she came home all giggly and happy and wanting to talk about what they did together. Jealous, Jake was, but very insecure too. So they argued about it, and no matter how many times Y/N told him that nothing was going on between her and Harry, he just didn’t believe her. The fight had escalated and became a screaming match, and Y/N was almost sure that the neighbours were going to phone the police on them. God, Y/N wish she had, as Jake just got more angry at Y/N, to the point when it scared her like a little lamb. Then, out of the blue, Jake did the unthinkable.

He hit her.

Jake had hit her, multiple times.

To him, he thought it established dominance, as after he did it, Y/N was sweet to him. Like she always was but to Jake it seemed unnatural for her to be nice.

It all carried on from there - she spent countless nights being scared that her body would be covered in bruises and cuts after he got home. Y/N spent most of her mornings covering up the marks with makeup, because she went out. As it happened for so long, she became rather good at it and no one had suspected a thing. But, after living all of her life in happiness, it was flipped upside and down she just lived in terror that one day, she would end up laying in a hospital bed, fighting for her life.

Tonight was the worst.

It was the night she feared the most.

He had got so angry, so fucking angry.

Jake had got that angry that he worn himself out, so ended up passing out in bed, that’s when Y/N slipped out the house to leave for a while, to find somewhere safe to go. And although Jake knew where it was, her first thought and destination was Harry’s house.

She had got a bus down to his house, as they were on opposite sides of the city to one another. Y/N had narrowly avoided an elderly couple giving her an odd look, or fussing over her when she stepped onto the bus. Her eyes caught theirs straight away and before they could get a properly good look at the state of her face, she pulled up the hood of her jacket and pulled it down over her. It shaded her face in all the right places so no one could see, and she kept her head down the whole time, occasionally looking up to see where she was. Her body ached the whole way and she just wished for some paracetamol to ease the pain for a while. Y/N knew she’d be able to get a couple at Harry’s house, but she needed them then.

The walk from the bus stop to Harry’s house was quiet, despite the shuffling of her feet on the concrete and the occasional car that drove past her. It was all so peaceful and silent, and the cold, fresh air was helping her cuts slightly.

And there here she stands.

Outside of Harry’s stunning residence, looking up at it like she was debating on whether to go inside, or to just turn around and go back to him. The devil.

She knew this was the right thing to do. So, she reaches out and pressed the intercom button as his security is tight, and he needs to speak the person before they enter the building. Within a few deafening buzzes, she hears a quick. “I can see you through the security cameras, Y/N. I’ve unlocked the door for you,” he tells her shortly before it goes quiet again.

Y/N reaches out and pushes open the door, before closing it behind her and hearing the mechanical whirring as it locks again. His house is lovely, and it’s only his front garden she’s in. It was an impressive, so to say it, mansion and although many of the large rooms were vacant, Harry didn’t mind. It was home. Once she is at the front door, she pushes it open and the first thing she hears is Tame Impala blasting through the house, so she immediately took a guess that Harry was just chilling, or singing. She closes the door behind her and kicks off her shoes, before pulling down the hood of her jacket. Her hands shook slightly as she began to wonder what Harry was going to say when he saw the state that she was in. It was the thing she was scared of the absolute most.

His house is warm and it provides her some comfort as she walks through it.

“I’m in the kitchen!” A voice then yells.

Y/N sighs in relief at the sheer sound of his voice, because although he was yelling, he wasn’t using the same tone that Jake not, not just an hour ago.

As she walks into the kitchen, she spots Harry facing the stove, cooking pasta. When he turns around and his eyes land on her bruised and cut face, his pales and he can’t even find the right words.

“What the fuck has happened to you?” He asks in a rushed tone and he moves towards her, not caring for the pasta now. Y/N tries to shrug him off gently as he tries to grab her face, and he almost frowns at her rejecting his touch. She shoves her hands into the pockets of her jacket, shrugging as she takes a seat on the breakfast bar, Harry just stands in front of her as he watches her intently.

She sighs. “I got jumped by two girls on the way here, they were looking for get my phone and purse off me, but it was fine. I fought them off, kinda,” she lies straight through her teeth, not wanting to tell him the whole story. She couldn’t. But she needed him, she needed him to be her safe haven for the night. Somewhere where she could hide. “It was just as I got off the bus, they pushed me to the ground and like kicked me and that. I’m fine - I mean it hurts like a bastard, but I’m fine,” she fake smiles and Harry sighs, going towards his stove and turning off the hob. He needs to clean her up before he can think of his dinner. Y/N watches him as he opens the cupboard under the sink, and pulls out a green box.

A medical kit.

“You need to be more careful when you travel here at night,” he tuts as he comes back over and sits down next to her. “You know what the streets of London are like.” He scolds her like a child.

Before he starts to clean her cuts and tend to her bruises, he helps her take off her jacket, which he places on the chair behind him. So she was left in her thin white, noodle strap top that wasn’t providing her any warmth. He then asks her if she could tie her hair up, so she pulls the bobble off her wrist and ties it up into a messy bun at the back of her head.

“You should’ve called me.”

She sighs. “I know, I’m sorry. I didn’t think it just all happened so quick,” she lies again like it was the easiest thing in the world, to lie to her best friend.

“Bus stops normally have CCTV so we can ask for the footage to be checked, see if we can find them,” he says as he gets a little cotton wool bud and puts some rubbing alcohol onto it. The first face he looks was her face, which seems to be the worst. He felt sick to his stomach that two random girls could do this to someone so harmless. “This is going to sting a little bit, okay?” He tells her gently, and she nods her head before clenching her fist. Harry puts the cotton wool on her face and she feels that horrible burn on the places that were already hurting so much. He apologises quickly, before wiping off that cut, as it was the one that had the most blood on it.

He looks at her, and sees the pain on her face, and frowns slightly. He hated seeing her in a lot of pain.

“Were you coming over here anyways?” He asks as he takes out some wipes.

She nods. “Yeah, I was feeling pretty bored.”

“Was Jake not in?” Harry asks harmlessly.

Y/N tries to hide it but her breath hitches when Harry says his name, so she plays it off like one of her cuts was hurting, just so Harry gets confused. “Uh, well he was. But he had been working the whole day and was tired, so he just ended up going to sleep. I was going to watch Drag Race, but remembered that it had been a days since we last seen each other.” She tells him, not all of that was a lie. Jake was asleep, but she waited until he was asleep so she could sneak out of the house without him knowing. If he had woke up when she was leaving, then God, there would be all hell to pay for. Harry smiles at her lightly.

“Well, I’m glad you’ve come over. Your room is made up again so if you want to stay then you can,” he offers up and she wanted to throw her arms around him and thank him, as she was too scared to go back.

But he couldn’t know that.

So instead she just nods her head with gracious (yet fake) smile on her lips. “That sounds great, Haz.”

After a few minutes, Harry had cleaned up the most of the cuts on her face, given that some of them were a lot worse than the others. He puts away all of the dirty stuff, before getting some clean ones out so he could move onto cleaning her hands. He had put some cream on the cuts on her head, so he decided he needed to do the same for the ones on her hands so they didn’t get infected. Harry puts down the cotton wool, and grabs her cold hands gently. But his brows furrow in confusion when he notices that they are perfectly fine. Surely she couldn’t of fought back and not got any marks on her hands? He asks himself as he continues to inspect her hands, so he wondered if his eyes were playing tricks on him.

When she notices him inspecting her hands like they were the most interesting things in the world, she yanks them away from his grasp.

Then it all clicks in Harry’s head.

If she had really fought back like she said she did, and given the state that she was in, her hands would definitely be all busted and cracked, with dried blood on them. He watches her face, as he displays a bunch of different emotions. Since they had been best friends for so long, he could basically read her like a blood book. Plus, she was terribly at hiding her emotions sometimes. Harry leans back in his chair as he looks at her again, but her eyes avoid his ones.

“Fought back, huh?” He asks, doing the ‘fuckboy nod’ but in a more angry way. He knew that she was lying to him now.

She doesn’t even look at him. “Yep.”

“But you don’t have any marks on your hands?” He pushes.

But this time, he doesn’t get an answer.

Y/N felt her heart beat getting faster when she knew thag Harry was onto her, and she chews nervously on the skin around her thumb. Harry notices that and immediately notices it as a sign she did when she was nervous or scared - and judging by the look on her face, Harry knew that she was feeling a mixture of the both of them. He didn’t want to make her sad by pushing the subject, but the more he went on, the less he believed that she had been jumped at the bus top. Then he remembered how her breath hitched when he said ‘Jake.’ He didn’t want to believe what he was thinking in that moment, so he remains calm as he looks at his shaking best friend. She looks so terrified, and it was making Harry slightly anxious.

“You didn’t get jumped,” he tells her softly, looking down at her to try and catch her eyes. But he fails. “Who did this to you?”

She shakes her head. “The girls at the bus stop.”

“There was no girls at the bus stop.”

“Yes there was.”

“Y/N, don’t lie to me. I know there was no girls, so tell me who did this and why they did it.”

“It was the two girls.”

This time, she was a little more hesitant when she responds to him, and that’s when Harry notices that she’s starting to crack. He felt like a terrible best friend who questioning her when clearly she was not feeling great, and feeling uncomfortable, but he knew that if he wanted the truth, he had to do this. It was all starting to come together now. Harry was just wondering why she lied about who hurt her badly, and who was she covering for?

“You’re a liar.”

She shakes her head. “I’m not.”

“Well I’m your best friend and sometimes I like to think I know you better than you know yourself. And right now I know that you’re bullshitting - there was no girls and you didn’t get jumped. So tell me, who did this to you?”

“Harry…”

“Y/N. Tell me.”

“I don’t want to say it.”

“Y/N…”

“Fine!” She then snaps, and Harry is completely taken aback by her sudden yelling. Y/N looks right at him with tears in her eyes, and her hoarse voice managed to yell out. “I lied to you, okay?! There was no girls at the bus stop, it was all a bullshit cover up for my boyfriend who beat the shit of me tonight. I had to leave when he fell asleep because I was scared that if I tried to leave when he was awake, he’d hurt me again. You were the only person I knew I could come to and your house could be my safe place from him. So there, Harry! Now you know. My boyfriend hates my fucking guts and I’m in an abusive relationship! Happy now?” She scowls as they tears fall down her cheeks, and she collapses back into the chair, a hand coming to rest above her eyebrows.

Harry didn’t know what to say.

He had just found out that his best friend was being abused, and he had no clue on how to even approach a situation like this.

There was going to be no remorse when he saw Jake, but that was the last thing on his mind at that moment. His mind was on his best friend, who was sitting in front of him, sobbing quietly, too scared to even move. Harry tries to put a hand on her thigh to soothe her, but the sudden action makes her flinch and pull back from him.

The sadness grows in Harry’s eyes. He’s fucking broke her.

“Bab, I am so sorry,” was all he manages to get out, as he didn’t have a clue what to say to her. She just nods, a sob passing over her lips as she had finally managed to tell someone. Maybe all of this can be put to rest after all of this stuff with Harry. He didn’t know what to do - was he to phone his mum and ask her what he was to do, or maybe Gemma? Both of the women in his family were super smart, and maybe advice from a woman about a woman would be the most helpful thing. But he knew that it would only worry Anne and Gemma, as they treat Y/N like she was a daughter and a sister. Like she was one of the family. There was something he wanted to do, but was too scared to ask Y/N. “Is it just on your face?”

She shakes her head. “Nearly e-everywhere.”

That was like a punch Harry’s gut. Nearly everywhere. God those two words were like ice cold daggers to his heart, and he could only imagine the things he was going to do to Jake for doing this to his best friend. What would possess someone to hurt another human being in this way?

“Can I see?”

Y/N’s eyes then shoot up, as she looks directly at him. “I don’t think I can, they’re everywhere, Harry.” She tells him, her voice quiet, but he just gives her a soft look. She knew he meant well and he only wanted to help, so that’s why she stood up so she could show him.

The first place she went was the hem of her leggings. Her fingers hooked around them and she pulled them down, just enough so Harry was able to see the top of one of her thighs - his breath hitched in his throat when he saw it. A massive bruise on her thigh, that had a few bits of dried blood on it. She looks down at her and a tear fell. Once she pulled the leggings back up, the next item of clothing she grabs is the shirt she’s wearing. Hesitating slightly, she pulls it up just below her boob, and this was the one thag shocked Harry the most - all over her stomach and side were bruises and cuts. It was like she had taken a million tiny knives to her stomach. One man had done this to a completely defensless woman.

Y/N then turns around, and lifts up the bun which had slightly fallen out, revealing her bruised back. It was worse than the front.

“That’s the worst of it,” she tells him, as she turns back around to face him.

“There’s more, as it was just relentless. Most of them are like on my legs, some in other places. I think if I had fought back, it would’ve been a lost worse, so I just lay there and let him do it.”

Harry felt the tears prick in the corner of his eyes as he realises that she was literally letting him do it to avoid herself getting hurt more. He tries to fight the tears back, but in the end, one of them slips and rolls down his cheek. He sniffles slightly, looking at his best friend who was in so much pain. “How long has he been doing this to you for?” He asks, wiping his nose as it had started to run, due to him crying. She pauses for a second, and Harry could literally see the cogs spinning like madness inside her fragile mind. “About 6 months.” Harry felt his heart stop again. All of this had been going on for six months and she had managed to keep it to herself and not tell anyone? He almost felt like throwing up right there and then.

“I got pretty good at covering everything with makeup,” she informs him like it was the most normal thing in the world.

Harry shakes his head. “Is there any reason he does this to you?”

“Yep,” she sighs. “He’s insecure about me being friends with you, as he believes that when I’m with you, I’m sleeping around with you. That was the first argument we had when he started doing this to me, and from then on that’s what it all seems to be about. I try to tell him that you’re only my best friend and that I would never do anything like that to him, but if anything that just makes him more mad as he thinks that I’m lying to him again. It’s become easier to deal with - argue, take the beating, go to bed, wake up and watch him be nice, cover everything up. It’s just a huge, repetitive cycle. As I said I thought it was becoming easier to deal with, but that all changed as of tonight. Tonight was definitely the breaking point.”

This was so much for Harry to register that he didn’t even know what to say. He kept on going back to the same thing though and that was getting his hands on Jake and teaching him a fucking lesson.

“I am so sorry that this is happening to you, Y/N,” he apologises again. “You’re never going back to him.”

“He’ll find me if I don’t go back.”

Harry shakes his head, “he won’t find you, because firstly, I have my security around the house and if I need to I can call in my actual security. Two, once you are all sorted out, I’m going to ring the police as I’m not letting him get away with this. I want to be the one to beat the fuck out of him, but I know I’ll get done for battery, so it’s best if I just let the cops handle this one.”

“No, Harry no you can’t!”

Y/N moves away from him, like she was ready to run from him. “If you phone the police everyone will get involved and I don’t want everyone to know!” She yells at him, beginning to cry again. His heart aches for her as he stands up and cautiously makes his way over to her shaking frame, not wanting to frighten her any further. “Please don’t phone the police Harry, as your best friend I’m begging you.”

“Y/N, bab, please listen,” he says gently as he stops in front of her. “The police are our best hope. If I don’t phone them, and let you go back then God knows how long this will go on for. If we get the police involved, they were take him to court and get a restraining order, or better yet put him in fucking jail. Yes they’ll ask for statements from you but when you do it you have to remember that the police are some of the most trustworthy people, and they’ll do all they can to help you, okay? You know I love you, and I know that you’re scared but I’m going to be phoning the police shortly. I can’t let you live like this. I don’t want you to live in fear because of him.” He couldn’t even bring himself to say Jake’s name. Y/N nods.

“I’m scared,” she sobs.

Harry opens out his arms for a hug, and she doesn’t hesitate before moving straight into them.

He wanted to squeeze her so hard that all of her broken parts mended, but he knew that she was so fragile and hurt. So instead, he hugged her lightly, resting his chin on the top of her head.

“Right, here’s what we’re gonna do okay? Me and you are going to go upstairs, and I’ll give you some of my clothes to wear for the night as I don’t want you sleeping in the stuff you came here in. I’ll make us a cup of tea and then we can do whatever you want. Whether that be sleep or watching the TV, but while you’re just getting settled I’m going to ring the police, okay?” He legs go of her and slightly bends so the two of them were eye level. As she nods her head, Harry kisses her forehead, and lets the kiss linger for a second. Once he pulls away, he grabs her hand and starts to lead her towards the stairs.

As they were halfway up the stairs, Y/N stops and Harry turns to look at her. “Can I sleep in your bed with you, tonight?”

His face softens, and he nods at her.

Once they were in his large bedroom, Y/N sat down on his bed and watches as he goes through his drawers to find something that she can wear. He pulls out a plain white t-shirt, and a pair of jogging bottoms. She then asks if he had a hoodie that she could wear also, so he pulls out one of his own merch hoodies. He hands the clothes to her, but waits a second. “I’m going to make the tea, and to ring the police, okay? You sure you’ll be alright up here alone?” He asks, and she nods her head. Harry smiles slightly before leaving his bedroom and closing the door behind her.

Y/N gets up from his bed and starts to get undressed so she could put on some warmer clothes. His clothes were big for her, so she had to pull the strings of the jogging bottons extra tight so they didn’t come down when she was sleeping, but other then that, it was all good. Once she was dressed, she tosses her dirty clothes into the washing hamper in the corner of his room, before climbing onto his bed. She settles onto ‘her side’ (the right side) as it was her favourite. Although it wasn’t her bed and was Harry’s, she first night she slept in it she had claimed her own side. It didn’t really bother Harry about the side that she had chose, as he preferred the left side. She buried herself under the heavy quilt, before looking around the room. It was complete silence, and she hated it.

But, she was more than thankful to Harry for tonight.

When she first arrived at his house, she was scared that he was going to notice, which in the end it did. But it was the build up to it. Having him realise that she had been lying all along to cover the tracks of the person who she wasn’t going to call her boyfriend anymore, so she didn’t hurt herself. Unfortunately, Harry was too smart and had found out, and having to tell someone that she was being abuse was one of the hardest things she had ever done. But, she was proud of herself for finally managed to tell someone.

She was just scared for what was going to come next.

About twenty minutes later, Harry came back up the stairs with two cup of teas, and a packet of chocolate digestives hanging from his mouth. He dangles them in front of Y/N so she can take them from him, which he does, and then she takes her boiling hot tea. Harry comes around the other sides of the bed and climbs in next bed, leaning back against the headboard. “The chocolate biscuits have been in the fridge, because I know you don’t like them when they’re warm and all the chocolate has melted,” he tells her, and she cracks a small smile at him remembering her habit. She opens the packet and offers it to Harry, and he takes a couple before putting them on the coasts that was on his bedside table. He looks at her.

“Did you speak to the police?”

“Yeah,” Harry nods after sipping his tea. “I told them about how you came here and what you told me - about how long it’s been going on for and stuff. They said that they’re going to go to your house, and I told them that you’re scared, as they were going to come here tonight to speak to you. So instead they said that you can some to the station tomorrow and give them a statement, and they can also have a nurse take a look at your bruises and that. Is that alright?” He asks and she nods her head with a small smile.

“I’m scared, and really nervous, but yeah that sounds good. Will you come with me?” She asks softly.

He nods. “Of course I will.”

Y/N takes a sip of her tea, before dunking her biscuit into it and eating it, as she watches Harry turn on the TV. She notices him flick through the channels until he finds the right one he wants, and when he clicks on it, the familiar elf with long blonde hair and the dwarf with an axe comes onto the screen. Y/N smiles as she instantly realises it as her favourite film - Lord of the Rings. She was a complete nerd for stuff like this, and just being able to wind down and watch this with Harry after such a hectic night is the best thing.

“Thank you, Haz, for everything you’ve done for me tonight. I honestly don’t know how to thank you for it all,” she tells him softly.

He looks at her and smiles. “I just want to make sure that you’re okay and that, y’know. I don’t want you to ever feel like you can’t come and talk to me, even if the situation is something on this scale, okay? I love you,” he tells her and she grins.

“I love you too.”

As the two of them sat in bed and watched the film, occasionally laughing at Gimli yelling at Legolas over who could kill the most orcs, Y/N couldn’t help but feel thankful for Harry. He was truly the kindest person on this whole planet, and she knew that she was so lucky to have someone as amazing as he is in her life, because she knew that if she didn’t have him, the outcome of tonight would’ve been different. And she didn’t even want to think about it. She knew that there was going to be way more stuff to come after all of this, like telling Harry’s family and her own family, but throughout it all, Harry was going to be with her every step of the way. He wasn’t going to leave her to deal with this alone. And she knew that, and that’s why she’s so glad that they’re best friends.

“Hey! Stop dunking your fucking biscuits into my tea, you have your own, and I’d rather not drinking biscuit crumbs!”

[galacticcannibalism]

Of Assassins and Hearts CH. 10

Chapter 10: Breaking News

beta-d by: @thinkwritexpress-official​ and @arrow-guy​

Summary: Time for Kylo to tell you the truth.

Rating: Explicit 18+ ONLY

Word count:2634

AO3 Link

Kylo Ren is an assassin. Kylo Ren is an assassin. Kylo Ren is an assassin.

The frilly underwear you held in your hand slipped from your numb fingers, your mind repeating the words over and over while Max’s voice in your head spoke soothingly to you. Your stomach lurched and you had to fight down the nausea that rose at the words.

That’s not the only secret he is hiding from you. His name Little Bird, what is his name? Max asked, his voice soft, almost concerned. 

“Kylo Ren,” you whispered aloud.

Your voice cracked with the words, leaving you feeling like your voice tried to stop you from uttering the lie.

Ben Solo, His name is Ben Solo. Now that I’ve revealed him, maybe it's time you come back to me, Little Bird,  he said, sweet and harmless.

Your ears rang as you wrenched yourself away from Max’s poisonous thoughts, but his words still rattled around in your skull like dice in a cup.

Assassin. Ben Solo. Assassin. Ben Solo. Kylo Ren. Kylo Ren. KYLO REN.

You sank to the floor, hands clamped over your ears, trying to stop the rattling, trying to see past the words Max had sprung on you. You squeezed your eyes shut and cleared your mind, blocking out Max and Kylo. You could feel them both in your head, a chafing presence. 

A hand on your arm pulled you out of the storm of thoughts and dual voices screaming in your head. You staggered to your feet, eyes still closed and voices still drowned out. The hand on your arm moved and pried your hands away from your ears, and you finally opened your eyes to find Kylo standing in front of you, his expression concerned. You jerked out of his hold and turned away from him. The tidal wave his hands held back threatened to overtake you again.

“Don’t touch me,” you spat at him.

“What’s wrong? What did I do?”

“According to Max, you’re a fucking liar!” you shouted.

“Listening to the nutcase that zip tied you to a chair is always a good idea,” Kylo said sarcastically.

“Who is Ben Solo?”

The words you whispered took immediate effect. Kylo’s face paled as he stepped back from you, stunned. You waited a few seconds before turning on your heel and leaving the store. The fact that he had no answer was proof enough that he had lied to you. You power-walked toward the road. Between the feelings of anger and sadness, your heart cracked as your mind went over every lie. Tears streamed down your face as you walked, partially blinding you to the Jeep pulling to a stop behind you.

“Y/N, get in the car,” Kylo shouted behind you.

You didn’t respond and chose to keep walking. 

I just need to get away from him.

“Please, Y/N,” Kylo pleaded from behind you.

“Leave her alone, dude, you’re dumped!” a man in a passing car yelled.

Y/N I’m sorry, Kylo said in your head.

Who is Ben Solo?

You stopped walking and turned to face Kylo. His head was tilted, making his hair fan across his face, hiding his expression from you. 

I’m Ben Solo.

“Why should I trust you?” you called to him.

You started back in his direction, determined to wring the truth from him. I can’t have another incident like I had with Max.

“I’ll tell you everything.”

“Everything? Like why you don’t go by your name kind of everything?” you asked.

“I will, I promise. Just get in the fucking car,” he growled at you.

You finished your walk to the Jeep and climbed in, waiting for him to start the conversation. He started the car up and took off down the road back onto the highway without a word. You watched the scenery flash by, mind drifting. 

What if he’s some kind of serial killer? What if I’m his target? Do I even know this man? If he doesn’t give me a satisfactory answer I’m gone at the next stop. 

Kylo glanced over at you before turning his eyes back to the road. You were sure he’d heard your thoughts, but he didn’t comment on them. You waited for a few more seconds for him to offer up the information.

“Before I explain, you have to understand some things are secret because they aren’t my secrets to tell,” Kylo started, his tone grave. “And I’m only going to go over this with you once because there are parts that not even I know.” 

You nodded, prepared to commit every word to memory.

“When I was a kid, I trained at my uncle’s dojo. My uncle, Luke, was a martial artist and a gunsmith. He wanted me to learn control and balance in my life. I lived with him and trained with him for years, learning different martial arts and my way around guns,” Kylo explained in a low voice.

“You asked me if I could shoot,” you pointed out.

“Yeah I did. I learned the beautiful calligraphy you write with too,” he said, casting a glance at your bright pink cast.

You pulled the sleeve of your shirt down to cover as much of it as you could suddenly embarrassed. 

“When I was 16, my uncle and I had a major falling out. I left and joined a gang, The Knights of Ren. I stayed with them for years, not realising how toxic they were. My dad pulled me out, but it cost him his life,” Kylo continued. “I was on the road with him one night. He was trying to talk me into going home to see my mother when his truck got ambushed. They killed him, and they killed me. They killed Ben Solo.”

You shuddered at what you heard. You could almost see it in your head, Kylo laying on a deserted road way with his body broken. You wanted to reach out to the broken man in your vision and cradle him, to reassure him everything would turn out alright. You looked at Kylo and the unshed tears in his eyes made your heart ache.

“What about Poe? Where was he during all of this,” you asked.

“You’ll have to ask him. It's not my secret to tell.”

“If you died...  how are you here?”

Kylo didn’t answer. Instead he concentrated on the road, humming again. You let him hum through Devil in Disguise before you started to get impatient.

“I woke up handcuffed to a hospital bed with feds standing over me, telling me that I was a suspect in a list of crimes that would land me six feet under if I was convicted. That list included murdering my father. They threatened me with jail time before leaving. What I didn’t know is that the Knights of Ren took exception to me leaving and decided to move illegal goods that The First Order wanted via my father’s truck,” Kylo explained. “The Knights of Ren are lenient, but the First Order is a leave-no-witnesses kind of group. ”

“You were supposed to die with him.”

The realization shook you to the core. Nothing could have prepared you for the revelation that the man who was supposed to be tied to you almost didn’t survive to form the bond.

I might have ended up Max’s Soulmate, you thought sourly.

“Nobody on the planet deserved to be tied to him,” Kylo said gruffly. “Sorry about earlier.”

You nodded absently and picked at the cast, resisting the urge to scratch at the growing itch.

“The doctors patched me up and released me. They told me I’d died on the table 3 times and they were surprised that I’d even survived. Before I made it 10 feet out of the hospital doors, the feds hauled me in, they were waiting for me to be released. First they threatened me, then they bargained. I didn’t have anything to give them, so I made them a deal; I’d take out the Knights of Ren and the First Order. But I’d need immunity for everything. Permanently. That included any jobs I took for them.”

You stopped picking at the cast and turned in your seat to look at him fully. Kylo’s expression had hardened while he told his story.

“I never killed innocents, only people that deserved it. Traffickers,untouchable, and murderers. People like that. I don’t just go on unchecked rampages. I have standards,” Kylo said, his tone harsh.

A few minutes passed in silence, broken only by Kylo taking deep, angry breaths. You wanted to say something but you didn’t want to interrupt if he had more to say.

“I killed them all. The Knights of Ren. That was the day Ben Solo completely died. He has a lovely gravestone, and he was buried with his father. I became Kylo Ren that day,” he narrated, his words starting to dip into a monotone.

“So, you really are an assassin?” you asked nervously. “What about your Mother and Poe, do they know?”

“They know and disapprove, but what can they do? The First Order needs to be stopped, or they’ll keep spreading.”

“Why me? Why did Armitage come after me?”

“I can only assume he came after you to weaken me. Nobody knows what effects the violent death of a soulmate can have,” Kylo answered.

You swallowed thickly. He wanted me to give up Kylo’s secrets and then he was going to kill me? 

“I’ll protect you, I swear. And I’ll stop them, and if Max has joined them, I’ll deal with him too,” Kylo promised fiercely.

“What were you going to tell me if I asked what your job was?

“Probably a police officer or something along those lines. Something safe.”

You didn’t ask any more questions as darkness fell and Kylo left you to mull over his words. Your heart sank the more you thought about everything he said and everything he hadn’t. He was an assassin, like Max said, but he hadn’t done anything overly threatening to you. 

“Wait, you said you pinned Armitage to my floor. Did you- I mean how? Why?”

“I pulled out a big ass knife and stabbed him through the chest with it, and pinned him to the floor. Not really rocket science,” Kylo answered with a shrug.

“How big was the knife?”

“The blade was about 14 inches.”

The amount of strength he’d need to do something like that is incredible. That is both extremely sexy and absolutely terrifying.

The words caught up with the rest of your brain.

“Wait, you left a man pinned to the floor of my apartment! Oh god I’m going to jail,” you groaned.

“He isn’t dead. Phasma can take his wounds from him. And they probably burnt down your apartment anyway.”

“And that is better how?” you asked, glaring at him.

Kylo shrugged and pulled off at the nearest exit and into a hotel parking lot.

“Why are we stopping? I thought we had a ways to go.”

“We do, I’m just tired. Get us a room and I’ll get us food,” Kylo directed.

You looked down at your clothes and back at him. 

You gestured at your sweat pants and said “Pockets.”

He dug into his own pocket and pulled out a cellphone and a credit card, pushing them to you. 

“My number is programmed in, text me which room it is.”

You climbed out of the Jeep and watched him speed out of the motel parking lot. You tapped the credit card thoughtfully against your chin while you pondered Kylo’s stunning revelations. You’d never heard anything so convoluted and twisted. If Max hadn’t already confirmed it in an attempt to get you away from Kylo, well, you’d never believe it. With that disheartening thought, you strode into the office of the motel.

After 10 minutes of haggling and a non refundable incidentals deposit that you were sure went into his pocket, you managed to get a double room. You glared at the man behind the desk and stalked out of the office, taking out the phone Kylo had handed you. You opened the contacts list, and true to his word, he was the only contact. You punched in a text message with the room number and pocketed the phone.

Where are you, Little Bird? I can come and take you away from him, Max’s voice spoke gleefully in your head.

Stay the fuck away from me, Max. I swear you’ll regret it if you don't, you snarled, sending every ounce of anger you felt through the connection.

You felt him flinch away from your thoughts, making you smile in satisfaction. Maybe the bastard finally felt an ounce of the pain he had caused.

Don’t worry, Little Bird. I’ll be there to save you, Max promised, his voice sounding far away and muffled.

While you walked, you pulled all the anger and pain you felt around you, using it to shield your mind. Max being in your head was a violation that couldn’t stand, no matter what the reason. 

No more, you thought grimly.

You made it to the room you’d texted to Kylo and unlocked the door; it surprised you that the hotel hadn’t switched to electronic keypads, but that wasn’t your business. You double-checked the door was locked then dropped the key with a clang on the little table by the door. Walking to the bed furthest from the door, it looked clean enough, so you kicked off your shoes and climbed in.

I’ll get up when Kylo needs to be let in.

You were pulled from sleep by a rhythmic sound, unidentifiable and soft. You looked to the empty bed across from you, noting with tired interest that Kylo wasn’t wasn’t there. You held your breath for a few seconds and angled your head to get a better feel for where the sound was coming from. When you determined it was coming from the bathroom, you climbed out of the bed and padded silently to the door. The sound of flesh-on-flesh followed by a sigh was unmistakable.

I should go back to bed, you told yourself. But what if it's some random person? That clerk was pretty sketchy.

You peered through the crack of the open door, resolved to scream bloody murder, but the sight in front of you froze the sound in your throat. Kylo was seated on the edge of the crummy bathtub, hunched over himself with his shirt clamped between his teeth, one arm braced on the side of the tub, the other moving rhythmically over his length. Your eyes strayed from his face, unable to keep yourself from watching his cock disappear in his fist. A bead of precum formed at the head and he spread it across the length of his cock with the palm of his hand, easing the friction as he thrust into his fist. The new sensation pulled another muffled whimper out of him that had your eyes shooting back to his face. He let his head fall back as he let out a low groan, and you sighed as the sound set you aflame. His motions halted at the sound, and he quietly called out your name, guilt heavy in the word. 

You backed away, slowly and soundlessly, retreating to your bed and climbing in, laying motionless. A few seconds passed before Kylo walked out of the bathroom and stopped at the end of the bed. He called your name again softly, as if he wanted your attention but was afraid to wake you. A few more seconds passed before he went back to the bathroom, shutting the door with a soft click. You rolled over and the scene played before your eyes over and over until you drifted back to sleep.

[hazzasgayvodka]

28 * DON’T LET ME DOWN * 28

Impact: Chapter 28

Chapter title song: Don’t Let Me Down - The Beatles 

JESS

The bell rings signaling the end of Literature and I realize I can't remember a thing Jason said all class. My mind is in a million places, my hand dragging my pencil across my paper in small lines that form messy doodles across my notes. I pack up my things into my bag and wobbly stand from my desk, my head pounding from lack of sleep. The flood of students going out the door gets me caught towards the back and I feel a shiver come over my body, the feeling of someone watching me.

I find myself looking over my shoulder to make sure for the hundredth time that he's not sat there with his feet propped up, staring at me. I swear I can feel his eyes on me, sending shivers down my spine and goosebumps along every surface of my body.

"Hey Jess."

I jump at the sound of Jason's voice, turning around to face him abruptly, nearly bumping straight into him. He grabs my shoulders, carefully holding me back.

"Woah, careful," He laughs, "Are you okay, you seem a bit off today."

"Yeah, I'm fine, thanks Jason." I falsely smile, wrapping my arms around myself as the shivery feeling returns.

He reaches forward, taking me in his arms and I'm shocked. His embrace is comforting, his arms are strong around my quivering body. He breathes over my shoulder, his body condensing as he sighs, and I recognize the familiarity of the action all too well.  

"It's going to be okay, he's-he's going to be okay." He says quietly, his voice cracking and I know that he's saying it more for himself than me.

I don't know what to say as he pulls away and I adjust my bag on my shoulder. His eyes meet mine and I realize now just how tired he looks, the angry red lines running through the whites of his eyes giving it all away. He nods to me in understanding, no words needing to be spoken but I surprise myself when I grab him in my arms again, pressing my head into his chest. He holds me to him, his hand cupping the back of my head. I breathe against his chest, his wrinkled button up quickly becoming stained with tears.

It's been three weeks.

He holds me back by my shoulders, wipes the tears from under my eyes with his thumbs and gives me a look of sympathy, neither of us know what to say. I weakly smile, thanking him for understanding as I adjust the strap of my bag on my shoulder and head to the door. I look over my shoulder one last time before closing the door behind me as he walks back to his desk and collapses in his chair. I watch as he runs his fingers through his hair, sighing, before finally letting his head fall into his hands.

It overwhelms me, makes me wonder why he thought this was all okay. Makes me ask where he is and what he's doing. It's been three weeks and I'm worried. No one has talked to him. He hasn't been in class, hasn't been at work. No, I can't do this. I can't go on worrying over him like this, I'm sure he's fine. I'm sure he's celebrating, finally raking in the payoff, and getting shitfaced with Niall right by his side.

It's then that I decide I need to go, I need to get out of here. I walk through the door and slam it behind me without looking back. Outside the sun is bright despite the cold, lifting my mood and making me squint my eyes. It dries the tear stains on my cheeks and warms me through my many layers of clothes. For the first time in two weeks, I feel a genuine smile tugging at the corners of my mouth.

I walk to the coffee shop on the corner and I see his head of blonde hair at the front of the line. He grabs two coffees and turns back towards a booth. He meets my eyes across the shop and smiles, walking over to me and handing me a coffee.

"I already got your favorite." He grins, guiding me to a table and sitting down across from me.

"Thanks Miles." I smile, bringing the cup to my lips and taking a sip.

"Are you okay?" He asks, searching my eyes for any signs of what's wrong.

"Yeah," I lie, just like I've been saying to everyone for the past three weeks, "I'm fine."

HARRY

I wake up to bright light and pain in my neck. The sun is pouring in through the window, scalding my eyelids. I shield my eyes with my hand, sitting up from the floor, my bleary eyes barely able to take in my surroundings.

This floor isn't mine, these walls are not mine, this isn't my house, where am I? I look down to see my body half naked, Ashlyn lying beside me with my jeans and my shirt scattered across the floor. Her hair is a matted mess, her eyeliner streaking down her cheeks, her red lipstick smeared across her face.

I grab my clothes and stand up from the ground shakily, my head swimming, the whole room rocking back and forth like a ship out at sea. I nearly lose my footing as I brace myself against the wall and drag my malfunctioning body in the direction I believe to be the bathroom.

I shut the door behind me once I successfully collapse into the correct room, bracing myself against the sink. I'm hardly recognizable, my eyes bloodshot and my skin much paler than I seem to remember. Ashlyn's lipstick is smeared across my face and all the way down my stomach, red scratches from her claw-like nails mixing with the bluish-purple bruises all down my torso.

I splash my face with water, hoping to uncover the world from the foggy film I seem to be looking through, but it stays the same, covered in a haze. I slip my shirt over my head, the stark smell of tequila invading my nostrils as I do so. I feel sick as I shove my legs through my damp jeans, drenched with sweat and alcohol no doubt. I run my hands through my hair, but it makes no difference, I haven't washed it in days.

My phone rings in my pocket, making me jump and I take it out to see the last person I want to talk to.

"Are you coming?" He asks impatiently.

"Yeah I'll be there in ten."

JESS

We're outside his house in fifteen minutes and walking through the front door to be overwhelmed by the amazingly sweet smell of strawberry cupcakes. I find Eliza almost instantly, rushing around the kitchen in her adorable apron and burnt orange colored dress. I take her in my arms for a hug, relishing in the contact and the way she holds me like a mother should.

"Eliza you look amazing." I smile, holding myself back from her to take in her ensemble from head to toe. The diamonds around her neck make the outfit themselves.

"Oh, Jessica dear, you are too sweet." She grins, holding an apron out to me and welcoming me into the kitchen.

I tie it around my waist as Vance appears around the corner with his briefcase in his hand, fumbling with the tie around his neck. His eyes land on me in surprise and he stops dead in his tracks.

"Oh, Jess, I didn't know you'd be coming by." He smiles warmly.

"I didn't either," I confess, "It was a bit impromptu."

"Well, you're always welcome here." Eliza smiles, glaring at Vance with a look of warning.

He clears his throat and pushes past me, kissing Eliza on the cheek before continuing out the front door. The air awkward now, I know I'm not as wanted as I want to believe I am. This isn't my family, what was I thinking trying to adopt myself into it? It's the only place I've been able to come and feel safe and secure the past couple weeks.

"You kids ready for the homecoming dance tomorrow night? It's gonna be a fun one right after the game." Vance smiles.

Miles meets my eyes immediately, I can tell he's worried that the mention of homecoming is going to throw me over the edge but I won't let it phase me. He grabs my shoulder in solace but I shake him off, turning back to Vance.

"I won't be attending but I'm sure everyone will have loads of fun." I say confidently, holding myself together until I turn back towards the door.

As soon as I'm around the corner I hear the whispered voices of Eliza and Miles scolding him. The tears threaten to spill from the corners of my eyes but I squeeze them closed and take in a breath just as Miles finds me again.

"I'm sorry, he didn't know-"

"It's fine, I'm fine."

He looks at me the way that he does, with that sorry look in his eyes. I can't stay here forever. Every minute I'm here, I feel broken. Miles handles me like I'll shatter at any moment. Vance and Eliza tread on broken glass with every word they say.

My mind is thrown back to the day he asked me, the loving smile in his eyes. His short hair. The way he picked me up and kissed me and kept grinning so hard his cheeks hurt. Even then there were secrets, too many to count.

I know I can't stay here but I don't know where else I could possibly go. My dorm is filled with memories of loud music and him laying on my bed. I can't be in there alone knowing that Sam is with him, in his house, our house.

It didn't feel real until she brought my stuff back, an entire bag of clothes and makeup and a full box of fruity pebbles. I remember her telling me that he was screaming, shouting at the top of his lungs as he trashed the house. He tore the sheets off his bed and threw them away and ripped out all of the drawers of his dresser and dumped them on the floor. He knocked over bookshelves and broke every CD he owns, all because it reminded him of me.

I wish I could do it, break everything. Maybe then I could eat more than toast and coffee. Maybe then I could sleep longer than an hour or two at a time before the memories flooded me and made me wake up in crying agony, reaching for him across the bed. Days feel like years and nights feel like eons. Laying in an ice cold bed without the presence of his tattooed skin feels like Hell on Earth. I want to break it all, I want to tear it all, get rid of it all. Get rid of the feelings that make me nauseous and the cautious looks of everyone around me. Maybe then I could be present for more than a few seconds before I slipped into my sedated state where I'm numb and it doesn't hurt anymore.

HARRY

I walk in the front door with my gym bag slung over my shoulder. I'm still stumbling, my balance still not fully composed. He meets me in the living room with hollow cheeks and dead eyes. I wonder if I'll look like that soon. How long do you need to feel dead inside before it starts to show?

Niall's here, he tells me I'm being an idiot. I shrug him off. I walk to the bathroom and grab a new pair of jeans and a shirt out of my bag. I'm clean for the first time in what feels like forever. It takes a while for the soap to suds up in my hair, to break through all the layers of oil and product covering every strand. I spend ten minutes scrubbing my skin wishing I could get rid of it all, scrape myself down to muscle and bones.

My skin is sore and red and angry but it's all gone, she's gone. Her touch isn't lingering, Ashlyn's lipstick no longer stains every inch of me, I'm not covered in anyone but me, it's just me. It's me covered in scribbly black ink and part of me wonders what I'd look like without it all. I can't remember what my bare skin looked like before I covered myself in memories.

I regret it instantly, I miss the feeling of her skin on mine.

She's gone.

She's gone.

She's gone.

I pushed her away, I scrubbed her away, she's gone.

I'll never feel her fingers trace my skin again, never feel her lips against mine, never hear her voice or see her beautiful eyes. I want it back, I want her back, I never meant to erase her. I pound my fist against the tiled wall, my hands gripping my soaking hair and tugging it from the roots. I can't stand its length. It's overgrown and curling around my ears and the back of my neck. I miss her hands, threading through it and twirling the waves around her fingers. My hands are different than hers, it'll never be the same. I wish the water would come out hotter and faster, I wish it would cascade down my skin, a steaming Hell bath, surrounding my nerves and making me feel like I'm drowning.

I can't breathe, I can't eat, I can't sleep, she's gone.

JESS

"Everyone's going to be here any second you all better be ready!" Eliza calls throughout the house and I'm glad I went ahead and got changed already so she isn't yelling at me.

Miles comes out of his room in nice khaki chinos and a white button up with freshly showered hair. He smiles, his eyes wide when they land on me and suddenly I feel self-conscious in the short white dress.

"Jess you look amazing." He grins.

"So do you." I smile, straightening his collar.

Vance appears next, coming down the stairs in a hurry, his hands fumbling with the tie around his neck, "Liza, can you help me please, I seem to be having amnesia because I can't remember how to tie a bloody tie."

She puts her hands on his shoulders, calming him down and assuring him that it's only because he's nervous. I notice the small tremors in his hands and a tiny bit of sympathy for him becomes apparent in my mind. He rubs the back of his neck the same way that Harry does and suddenly I feel sick.

"Guys," Miles says, breaking away from me to sling his arms over both Eliza and Vance's shoulders, "It's just the first meeting of the wedding party, it's really not that big of a deal."

Eliza smiles, patting Miles' hand on her shoulder and smiling fondly at her son, "You're right, it's not a big deal Vance."

"We've only been planning this for a few months Liza," He sighs, "Is it too soon for all this? We don't even have a venue booked yet-"

"Do you think anyone cares?" She asks him, "It's both of our second weddings, it's not going to be crazy and extravagant, is it?"

"No but-"

"Then why do we care?" She smiles, leaning forward and pressing her lips to his, causing my stomach to flutter with happiness for them.

She pulls away from him, exiting back to the kitchen as a timer goes off for her cupcakes most likely. Vance's smile is brighter, his shaking hands stilled, and I feel a small bit of admiration for him.

"What would I do without her?" He laughs.

The doorbell rings a few minutes later and Eliza nearly jumps out of her skin, gathering everyone together and making sure everything around the house is in tip-top shape. She opens the door with a smile to two tall boys with matching grins who envelop her in a hug almost instantly.

"Jacob! Lucas!" Miles shouts, jumping into the group hug.

It finally clicks when I remember Miles telling me stories of his brothers. One of the boys grabs Miles in a headlock, ruffling his hair, making Miles whine about how Mom's going to kill him. He shoves him away before the next brother grabs him the same as before. Vance joins the hug, clapping both Jacob and Lucas' backs, all of them smiling like a family stock photo.

"Jess, what are you doing standing over there, get over here!" Vance laughs, all five of them opening their arms for me to join and I can't help the smile that spreads across my face.

I slip into their arms, joining the hug and my heart fills with joy, every part of me lighting up like a Christmas tree. I haven't felt true happiness like this in forever, the kind of happiness that makes you smile so hard your cheeks hurt. The brightness of the world increases, the swell of my heart just might cause it to burst through my chest. Miles takes me in his arms and kisses my cheek, his sparkling eyes nearly addicting. It's a kind gesture, nothing too romantic. Just enough to make my heart swell and hug him back.  

The doorbell brings me hurtling back to reality and the door swings open revealing Lex holding two bottles of wine. He kisses everyone's cheeks, his face already flushed from alcohol or maybe excitement, who knows? Everyone greets everyone, everyone smiles, everyone hugs and cheers and grins and drinks. Everything is perfect, and I realize that there is only one person that could make me feel better than I do right now.

Just as the thought enters my mind, Harry strolls through the door. He's dressed in trousers and a button up, both all black. I can see him stumbling from here as he leans against the counter to walk himself to the living room. Is he drunk right now?

"Oh my god Jess, I'm so sorry, I really didn't think he'd actually show up." Miles rambles, taking my hand in his and trying to drag me away but I can't take my eyes off him.

His hair is overgrown and messy, curling around his face. It looks like it hasn't been brushed in days. I'm surprised to see his earrings and lip rings all removed. He grabs a short glass from the stack on the counter and fills it with bourbon, stumbling to the living room and collapsing onto the couch beside Lex. I move around the counter to get a better look at him and the sunken purple bags under his eyes.

I gasp as he looks up and his eyes meet mine. Despite the obvious tiredness in them, they're still vibrant, the greenest eyes I've ever seen. I tear my gaze away from him quickly, turning back towards the kitchen. I expect him to charge me, to run up to me and make a scene and beg me to listen to him but he stays put. I turn back around to see his eyes still trained on me, glaring as he stares over the rim of his glass, wincing as he swallows.

It hurts, staring at him. Knowing that he's just right there but he's so far away. It hurts knowing that he's done, that he's not going to get up and scream in my face. I wish he would, I wish he'd run up and smash his glass against the counter and beg me to look at him. I wish he'd do anything but just sit there and stare at me, mocking me because he's so close but so far.

It breaks me, the tears welling up and my throat threatening to close as I realize he's not fighting. The one man who always fought for me till the end, who never gave up despite our differences, he's not fighting anymore. He's sitting on the bench, watching the game go by and I'm getting slammed from every direction. He's not jumping in to help, he's not calling for a timeout, he's been reduced to only a spectator.

I choke out a sob as I put down my glass of champagne and head for the door. I can't be here with him. I never could have imagined that it would be this brutal, this heart wrenching. To stare into the eyes of the man I...I thought I could do it, I thought I could pretend everything was okay but that was before I saw him acting as if he's fine. Is he? Does it hurt him the same way it's hurting me? Has he been the same, going about his days as if we never happened? Lord knows I couldn't do it if I wanted to.

But maybe it wasn't to him as it was to me. Maybe he doesn't miss me the same way I miss him, like someone cut off my right hand. Maybe the sound of my name doesn't knock the wind out of him, maybe he sleeps every night without the empty pit in his stomach.

Miles tries to follow me as I run towards the door, but I hold him back, telling him to have fun as I evade the line of his brutal gaze.

HARRY

When my eyes land on her, my breath is knocked from my lungs. I haven't laid my eyes on her in weeks. My throat wants to close up but I take a sip of champagne to settle my heaving breath. I can't tell what it is, but she looks different. Her hair is more purple now than red, a dark burgundy indigo color. It's shorter, not touching her shoulders at all, and bone straight.

She looks frailer, has she been eating? Surely, she can't transform her body in only three weeks, but I swear her arms and legs are thinner than I remember. Perhaps it's the way her body folds in on itself rather than standing confidently as she usually does.

Her eyes are the same, a burning inferno. A golden brown that sucks you in like quicksand and holds you hostage for as long as you'll let it. She turns away suddenly, ripping my gaze away from her and running towards the door.

She can't do it, she can't see me, it's hurting her I can tell. I wish I could say it makes me feel better but it's anything but. It's a stab to my chest, over and over, the death of an already deceased heart. I want to run to her but I'd only be making it worse, I know. Miles follows her, and it makes me sick to my stomach. Are they back together? Is she happy with him? Is he the one she kisses goodnight and calls to pick her up from class?

Vance sits beside me, the couch beneath me dipping under his weight. I can tell he knows he's treading on thin ice with me, he doesn't know what happened, the torture I've been through.

"You look like hell." He sighs, grimacing.

"I've been through there once or twice this week."

He looks at me with sympathy in his eyes, he feels sorry for me. I haven't slept in all three weeks, the fear of nightmares swarming me after going so long without them keeps me awake. Everything I eat ends up coming back up, so I spend my daily calories on bourbon, jack, and vodka.

"We leave for San Francisco next week," He sighs, and I remember fondly the days I was planning to surprise Jess with the news of the trip, "Are you coming?"

"Is she going?" I ask.

He grimaces, knowing that neither of us will agree to go on this trip as long as the other is attending. I can put on the mask but I know she can't, she has no ability to hide her feelings as well as she wants to make everyone believe she can. She might fool others but I know, I know her.

"I'm not sure, she said she'd give me an answer tonight."

"She just left." I say monotonously, nodding my head towards the door.

He looks at me incredulously as he stands from the couch and shuffles past all of his guests to get outside and find her. I'm sure she's long gone by now, she was always good at running.

JESS

The front door opens, and I turn around expecting to see him, my heart fluttering in my chest but my eyes land on Vance instead. I curse myself for hoping it was him, what's wrong with me? Vance rushes to my side and the tears pour down my cheeks, hiccupping sobs echoing from my body.

I haven't cried since the second week. I thought I finally had him out of my system but seeing him here in the flesh ripped my stitches and reopened a gaping wound.

He crouches down, sitting on the concrete steps beside me without a word. He places his hand on my back and rubs up and down lightly, just enough to ensure me that he's here. I continue crying but it slows, the vicious sobs that were once rocking through my body now replaced with small sniffles and single tears falling down my cheeks.

"Have you thought about San Francisco?" He asks, surprising me.

"Not even a little bit." I sniffle and he laughs.

I know he doesn't want to say what he's really thinking. I know I haven't told him what really happened between me and Harry, he has no idea.

"You know," He starts, his eyes drifting across the street, "When Harry was a baby he cried all the time, we could almost never get him to stop. I remember I used to sing to him and rock him in his crib, there was only one song that could ever calm him down."

"What was it?" I ask, turning to look at him.

His eyes stay staring straight ahead, a small smile finding its way onto his lips, "Don't Let Me Down by The Beatles."

I let out a small laugh, my face finally breaking into a smile. He pats my back and laughs with me, finally turning to meet my eyes.

"He was singing it word for word by the time he was three years old," He chuckles, his eyes glossy as I wipe tears from my own, "He's always loved music, always turned to it for comfort. He has an addictive personality Jess, I think you know that. He's addicted to music because it makes him feel safe and he's addicted to you because you make him feel everything else."

His words make the tears pierce my eyes again and I'm hastily wiping them away with the backs of my hands, wishing I could shove the words out of my mind. I repeat them over and over in my brain and I know that they're true because he does the same to me. He ignites me like I'm the flame and he's the damn gasoline, fueling the fire within me. He has the ability to make me sad, to make me angry, to make me so unbelievably happy and so fucking mad.

I let my head fall to Vance's shoulder as the tears pour from my eyes and he wraps his arm around me comfortably. I haven't been held the way a dad holds you in so long and as soon as he starts rubbing up and down my back the tears come faster.

"Don't let him down Jess, don't let him down." He whispers, and that's when I finally shatter.

HARRY

"Another!" I yell over the loud pumping of the music, slamming my glass down on the bar top.

The bartender gives me a look that makes me want to punch him in the face. The world is swimming again, tilted and fading a bit black around the edges like an artistic vignette.

"Are you sure, sir? I think you've had enough." He says warily.

"I'll be the judge of when I've had enough! Your job is to serve so why don't you do your fucking job you fucker!" I shout, my face becoming hot and I can't tell if it's due to the alcohol or the adrenaline now coursing through my angered veins.

"Um, yes sir, another one right up." He says his voice rushed and sporadic.

"You bet it is, and you better make it quick, I'm not feeling too patient tonight."

He nods his head quickly, not daring to meet my eyes as his shaking hands grab a fresh glass from behind the bar and he pours yet another whiskey coke.

I feel my phone vibrating in my pocket for the hundredth time tonight and I let out a hefty sigh as I finally unsheathe it from my pocket and glance at the many notifications flashing across the screen. Surely, he's got to know by now that I'm simply not answering it. If he wants to talk to me he's going to have to get off his lazy ass and come find me.

The young man behind the bar hands me my fourth whiskey coke with rattling hands and I throw my head back, gulping it down in only a few sips. I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand and I feel his eyes on me as I slide the small glass back across the bar.

"Dylan, is it?" I ask, straightening up on the barstool I'm sat on.

"Um, yes sir." He says quickly, extending his hand.

"Harry," I say curtly, eyeing his outstretched hand, "Harry Styles."

"As in Styles publishing house?" He asks, his eyes widening.  

"Something like that," I muse, "But that's not what I want to talk about."

He nods his head, attempting to seem casual but I can see the gears turning in his head as he eyes me, taking in my unusual appearance due to lack of sleep and abundance of alcohol.

"How old are you?" I question.

"Eighteen sir."

"Stop calling me sir."

"Yes sir-I mean-Mr. Styles." He stutters, his voice cracking due to nerves.

"Have you ever been in love, Dylan?" I ask, seemingly surprising him with my question.

"I um, yes, I have a girlfriend that I love very much."

"Tell her that," I advise, "And mean it. Tell her how much you love her every single day and don't be afraid to lose yourself, because she'll find you. If she runs, chase her. If she pushes, you better pull her right back, do you hear me Dylan?"

He nods his head vigorously, his uneasy eyes still trained on me wondering what I'll say next of course. My stomach feels uneasy as he offers to pour me another drink and I decline. I produce a carton of cigarettes from my pocket and ask him to light it for me.

I inhale carefully, relishing in the calmness that settles over me. Every cell of my body moves slower and allows me to think, relaxation covering me like a cloud and finally I can breathe.

"Why are you telling me this Mr. Styles?" He finally asks, speaking up despite the comfortable silence that had asserted itself between us.

"Because Dylan," I begin, "The perfect woman only comes into your life once, and I let mine get away. She's going to take on the world and I wanted to be beside her when she did, but I blew it. She was brilliant, and I let her go." I gulp, the words coming out shakier than I intended, "Don't let her go, Dylan."

I see him walk in a few minutes later, sighing in relief when his eyes land on me. He walks over and takes the bar stool next to me, collapsing onto the seat.

"I'll have a whiskey coke." He sighs, nodding to the bartender.

I grimace as the words come out of his mouth, I guess it's true, I really have been cursed to be just like him. He looks over at me, but I keep my eyes staring into the brown liquid in my glass. The bartender hands him his drink and he thanks him, taking two large gulps.

"I thought you didn't drink anymore?" I ask, turning to him with glaring eyes.

"To get through tonight, between the two of you," He groans, pinching the bridge of his nose, "I need a drink."

I think back to what I said to the bartender, it's everything I should say to her. I can't believe it as I look over at him, that out of everyone around me, he's the one that's here.

"Thanks," I shrug, swirling the drink in my glass, "For coming."

He nods, not saying a word as he gulps down another sip of his drink, grimacing as it goes down. I laugh as he shakes his head, his mouth puckering. He really hasn't drank for a while.

I drink another and he gets a water. I know he's staying until I leave, he won't let me get in a car in this state and I'm glad. He forces a water into my hand and stares at me the way a father does when he's telling you to eat your vegetables.

"Dad?" I ask, the word falling out of my mouth before I can catch it, "How do you know if a girl is the one?"

He straightens up in his seat, finally turning to face me and meet my eyes. He shakes his head with a chuckle and places his glass on the bar top, folding his hands in front of him.

"Harry," He says seriously, holding my gaze, "When you're sitting in a bar with your deadbeat dad after hardly speaking for years and asking him how to tell if she's the one, she's the one."

JESS

I walk into the office shakily, an uneasy feeling washing over me every time I get off the elevator. I'm always on edge, just waiting to turn around and see him standing there. He hasn't been in for weeks, Lex has been bringing him his work at home apparently, but I don't think he's been doing any of it.

It's crazy how quickly he went from being an absolute workaholic to not showing up in three weeks. It makes me think that all his hours here were just a lie too.

Vance strolls passed me as I head to the break room to grab a cup of coffee and his face is solemn as he waits to see what kind of mood I'm in today.

"Morning, Vance." I sigh, putting all of my effort into a smile.

He pats my shoulder and holds the door open for me. I grab a mug and pour a cup of coffee, it still feels foreign to only make a cup for myself.

"Did you finish up that paperwork I left on your desk?" He asks, taking a sip of his coffee.

"No, I'm sorry, I'll get it done first thing today." I sigh, running a hand through my hair in frustration.

"It's okay," He laughs, "Really Jess, it's not life or death."

I let out a breath of relief as he leans against the counter and I shake two sugar packets into my coffee with trembling hands. No matter how hard I try they won't be still.

"Have you thought about San Francisco?" He asks and my stomach flips.

"Yeah," I say uneasily, "I think I should go."

He looks up at me in surprise, his eyes wide in shock, "You do?"

"Yeah, I need to see this place, I want to explore and see the new building." I say carefully.

"You're thinking of moving there after school, aren't you?" He asks knowingly.

I feel the tears in the corners of my eyes as the words come out of his mouth, but I grip the edge of the counter and steady myself, breathing heavily.

"I can't come here every day and pass him in the hallway and act like nothing happened," I breathe, "I think I need to get out of here."

He nods his head in understanding, pursing his lips as he stands from leaning against the counter. He pats my shoulder, giving me a squeeze as he walks past me and that's when the tears burst, cascading down my cheeks.

HARRY

"What do you mean you're not letting me go to San Francisco? I'm head of editing, you can't just tell me I can't go!" I yell, pointing my finger into his chest with every word.

"Harry, you're off the rails. You haven't come into work sober in two weeks! We made an executive decision based on the future of this company, this is not the time for your antics!" Lex shouts.

"What the fuck are you talking about, mate? I'm fucking fine!"

He's not wrong.

"Harry, I'm really worried about you. What's happened? Something's changed." He says genuinely.

Her face comes surfacing to my mind and I want to rip my hair out. My morning scotch is wearing off and everything I've been trying to bottle up is coming rushing. Her eyes, her skin, her touch, her taste. It's all coming back, sitting in the office we shared one too many intimate moments within. I remember dancing and smoking by the window, tying ties and making out on desks.  

I'm going to throw up.

"Harry! Oh my god, are you okay?" He asks a million questions a minute, holding me up from collapsing after emptying my stomach of scotch on his carpet. "Talk to me!"

"Sorry." I mumble, wiping my mouth with the back of my hand.

He's looking at me like I'm crazy, like I've just been diagnosed with a life-threatening disease. He looks like he's about to tell me that I only have a few weeks to live and the worst part is that I'd believe him if he did.

"Harry, you're not okay, you're not even stable. What's wrong? Are you sick? Do you need help? A doctor?" Lex asks over and over.

I can barely keep my eyes open and the contents of my stomach settled as I nod along to his many questions. It feels like an interrogation, like every part of me is vulnerable and out on display but I know it's the exact opposite. I know I'm not okay, but I refuse to believe myself when I say it, I refuse to believe I've truly done it, gotten rid of her.

But the truth of the matter is, I'm not okay, I'm not even stable.

[dammitadolfnomorecake]

COTW - Chapter 6 update

It was like the previous night hadn't happened. Setting up near the water's edge, Eren looked amazing. Dressed in a loose white shirt and short white shorts, his long brown legs contrasted perfectly, as he caught the eye of everyone on the beach. Kicking back under the beach umbrella they'd rented, Eren was fussing over Viren as the boy tried to say no his floaties. It wasn't happening. No way was Levi risking his son's healthy and safety with that much water right in front of them. Pulling out his phone, Eren snapped photos of Viren, while Viren tried to escape to the water. Kissing the boy, Eren somehow seemed to get the photo he wanted, before looking up to him "Viren's ready for a swim, daddy. You should be the one to take him in. I can't swim" "You'll be fine. We're only going to the water's edge" "I don't feel that great. I think the rice from last night didn't agree with me. My stomach's been gross all morning" He'd probably thrown up so much that his muscles didn't know how relax "Are you sure?" "Yeah. I really want to get some good photos of you with Viren. He's so excited to be here" "If you want to go back to the hotel room, that's ok" "No. Family holiday remember. Besides, my two best boys make for the best targets" The smile that Eren gave him, seemed genuine enough. But the jealous stain on his heart, from the previous night, still left his blood cold. Distracting himself, he scooped Viren up "You're just going to take photos? Or record?" "Recording? Definitely recording. You two look so good together" "Ready?" "I'm more than ready" Viren cried the first time the cold water ran over his feet. His little legs marching up and down on the spot as he reached up Levi's hold. Eren was laughing as he watched. Slowly the pup seemed to realise that the water wasn't some big scary monster in the closet. Falling in his bum, he splashed his legs. The joy was obvious. This was what he thought being a family would be like. Him. Viren. Eren. All of them a team and force of their own. Abandoning his phone, Eren came to sit on Viren's other side while Levi helping Viren build sand piles, only for the waves to continually wash them away. The boy too curious about it all, to be mad at the fact his work was being wasted. Settling himself down, Eren's hand landing on their son's head as he adjusted his hat "He seems to love it" "He really does" "I got heaps of you two together. I want him to have these memories" "So do I. How do you feel?" "I'm ok... my stomach doesn't know what to do when I'm not throwing up" "Does it hurt?" "A little. But this is nice" "We should head back up to the hotel soon" "We only just got here" "It's getting hotter faster than I thought it would. Today would be better inside. We can look up tourist things" Eren hummed, looking up to the bright clear blue sky "Mmmm. The sun feels nice, but he's got such delicate skin like you do. You're already starting to burn" "And you're not?" "Nope. Because I put sunscreen on" "So did I" "Mine must be better than yours. Viren, baby. It's time to get out of the water" Trying to lift Viren, Eren groaned, releasing the boy as hand moved to his stomach "Eren?" "It's ok. My stomach's still sore... maybe today would be better if we found something else to do?" "There should be a museum or something around. If we can't find anything, we can always take a drive" "I thought you'd be sick of driving after yesterday" "It's all about making memories, isn't it?" Eren looked confused for a moment, before cringing, then smiling softly "Yeah. Do you want to convince him to get out of the water?" "I've got it. Will you be alright packing up?" "Yes, mum. I can handle packing up. Hey, there's a great bar around here, I found it last night. They're supposed to do lunch. We could there, I mean... if you want to?" Levi's breath caught momentarily. Eren was bringing up the bar. The alpha wasn't sure if it was the sun, or the deep shame he felt at mentally accusing Eren of cheating, that burnt at his cheeks... no. It had to be the sun. Alphas didn't blush! "Sounds good. Did you have a good time last night?" "I ordered a lemonade. Just because we're on holiday, doesn't mean that I'm off mum duty" "I never said it did. Let's head back up" Leaning over Viren, Eren pressed a sweet kiss to his lips "I love you. Just. Don't forget that" "I know" "Good. Let's get this one up and into a bath. Then it's food time" * Some how their trip to the beach had ended up taking up two hours. No wonder he'd started to burn. Heading into the bathroom with Viren, the boy didn't like the fact they weren't down at the beach anymore... and for a kid who's feet had barely touched the sand, he sure had a lot of sand over him... and in his mouth. He hadn't even seen the boy eating it. Cleaning the pup down, he carried Viren out to the living area so Eren could get him dressed. His omega busy rifling through his suitcase "Viren needs clothes" Dropping whatever was in his hands, back into his suitcase, Eren snapped it shut. Levi was getting real tired of Eren hiding whatever it was that he was "He looks like he needs a nap too. You don't mind waiting a little longer for lunch, do you?" "No... you really want to go back to that bar, hey?" "Yeah. It was... it was nice. And they were super friendly" "Oh, yeah?" "Yep. I think I might head back there tonight, if you don't mind" Levi's stomach did that annoying thing where it decided to drop again. Mental images flashing of Eren laughing with that stranger. And then. It was like the last two hours had never happened "Levi? Everything ok?" "What?" "You look like you have something to say" "It can wait" "Ok. Well. I have some things I want to talk to you about. I did some thinking last night, and I think I need to tell you" Eren did some thinking? This was it. His heart was racing. His mate was about to dump him. To dissolve the bond between them, and return the two rings that sat on his perfect finger... the two rings that were still waiting for a third to join them "Levi?" "Sure. Whatever. We'll talk. Viren needs clothes" Practically dumping their son on the bed, the boy jumped straight off, falling face first as he did. "Viren!" Screaming his name, Eren rushed to the boy "Levi! What the hell was that?!" "I didn't mean for him to fall" Lifting Viren off the floor, Eren nuzzled into the boy's hair as he hushed him "I don't know what your problem is, but go take a shower" "I didn't mean..." "Go shower. It's ok, baby. It's ok. You're ok" Rocking Viren was a bounce in his step, Eren shot daggers in his direction "Levi, go cool down. I can smell your anger" "I'm not angry" "Don't lie to me" "I'm not" "Is it the bar? We don't have to go. I just thought it would be a nice place to have lunch with you" His confusion and fear over having been the cause of his son's fear stripped away the filter on his mouth "Is it me you want to have lunch with? Or that man you were with last night?" Eren blinked at him, a confused and hurt expression clouding his face. He practically hissed in Levi's face "What?! What are you talking about?!" This was definitely not the time to be having this conversation. And now Eren was lying to him "Don't worry. I'm going for a shower" Stupid. Fucking. Shitty. Idiot. Scrubbing himself aggressively. He stayed under the cold spray until his scent was completely washed away. He'd just admitted to Eren that he'd stalked him again. That he didn't trust him. Forgetting to take clothes with him, he walked out wearing a towel. Eren was sitting on the end of their bed, the omega wiping at the tears rolling down his face while Viren was laying on his own bed, their son probably exhausted from all the fun and excitement the morning had brought "Eren... what's wrong?" "I worked it out. You weren't down at the car were you? You fucking followed me. I can't believe you" "You can't believe me?! I'm not the one who was letting a stranger buy me drinks! Is that why you want to go back? To see him again?!" "What? No. That was some random" "He brought you a drink and you fucking started acting like an idiot!" "His mate brought me a drink! When I sat down, he mistakingly thought I was interested in him and tried to tell me he was bonded. It was the only free seat at the bar at the time. I set him straight, and he went back to his mate. The drink was from her as a joke. God! Do you seriously think I would stoop to your level?!" "What's that supposed to mean?!" "You're the one who cheated Levi! I know it! I smelt omega and slick all over your pants and your arousal! I've been trying so hard to find a way back to you, but you don't even care" "I never fucking cheated on you!" "You're lying! Admit it! Admit it, Levi! You don't want me anymore! I'm useless!" "Don't you dare start with this fucking shit! I'm trying my hardest to do everything for you!" "You cheated on me! I smelt it!" "I never fucking cheated on you. My bosses mate went into heat and collapsed at work. She called me, because she needed help and needed an alpha she could trust. The whole time, I was thinking about how that could be you" "So you cuddled up with an omega in heat, thinking of me?! Is that supposed to make me feel better? I smelt your arousal!" "I wasn't aroused!" "Their slick was on your pants!" Eren's sobs grew harder "I knew it! I knew you didn't want me anymore!" "You're the one who doesn't want me!" "I've never wanted anyone or loved anyone more than you! You're everything to me! Everything Levi! You don't trust me! You... I never cheated on you. I never even had the thought to! You're the one who replaced me" "I never cheated either. I don't want anyone else! Why don't you get it!?" "Because I don't belong in this family! Not anymore!" "Yes you do! God. I can't live without you! I followed you last night because I was worried. It's not because I don't trust you, it's everyone else I don't trust! I don't want you hurt! I don't want you scared! I want you by my side forever!" "Then why aren't we married?! I thought we'd be married by now! I was so excited. I even started planning it. I even stupid changed my name to Eren Ackerman-Yeager on everything I could, because I was serious when I proposed to you! You're everything I ever wanted..." "Shit. Fuck. How the fuck did we end up like this? How did I hurt you so badly that you think and accept I would cheat on you?! Where did we go wrong?" Blinking through his tears, Eren started rummaging through his suitcase. His mate stopping once he'd found whatever it was he was looking for. Angered at his omega was disregarding such an important conversation, Levi snatched the box from his hands. His eyes widening as he read the name, his alpha barely contained "What the fuck is this?!" "What do they look like?" Despite the drop in volume, Eren's voice carried all the anger it had before. Miserably, Eren resumed wiping at his face "Eren?" A pup. Another child... His alpha was over the mood at the idea of another pup... and bit by bit the pieces came together for him. The way Eren said his pills stopped. He'd had to stop taking them, but couldn't tell him because he'd pushed him so far away he seriously believed Levi had cheated. The confusion Eren must have felt believing he was now his second choice. The struggles with Viren and getting the boy to show him love, even when Eren presented him with everything but the moon on a silver platter. Eren's tone became filled with resignation and despair, the kind a parent uses when disappointed in you, and you wish they'd hit you instead "You want to know what's wrong? Fine. I'm fucking pregnant. Ok. I'm not sick. I don't have a stomach bug or food poisoning. I have a baby growing inside me that you don't even want. You're always using two fucking condoms, but you didn't the night of Mike and Erwin's wedding, and you never bother sticking around once your knots deflated. So I wasn't planning on telling you. Now just back the fuck off. We already have one kid that doesn't fucking want me around" Shoving past him, Levi was too shocked to think. Pregnant. He. What. Another pup? Why didn't Eren tell him? How far along was he? And... abortion pills? Eren seriously thought he didn't love him? Or love him enough to want another child? He used two condoms because Eren had said he was scared of falling pregnant again. That and he didn't want to come way too fast, given their sex life was interrupted by parenting and responsible adulting... and Eren's arse was incredible "Eren? What? When did you find out?" "A few weeks ago" Weeks. He'd been stuck like this for weeks. Stuck thinking Levi didn't want another kid with him. Who knew how depressed and empty that had made him feel "And you didn't tell me?" "I. I've been trying to figure out us! I was going to hide it, but after the beach and last night... I needed to tell you. It's not... ok. I'm not ok" "You said you needed to talk..." "Yeah... well. Surprise. I'm pregnant and my body isn't coping... fuck..." The word came out like a grunted groan of pain. He didn't even have time to question it "Daddy? Mummy?" Turning from the box of pills, Levi looked to a newly woken Viren as there was a solid a whimper behind him. Turning completely, his eyes widened. Eren's wet white shorts were fast turning red as blood ran down his thighs, his left fingertips covered in it, with clear traces of finger marks across Eren's legs where he'd wiped "Eren..." "Levi... I don't feel good" As his mate's eyes rolled back, Levi dropped the pill box, barely catching Eren by the arm as he crumpled. Across the room, Viren started screaming in fear. Eren had said his body wasn't coping. He'd been put on pills to combat his nausea, but his mate's body must have been giving everything it could to their child. He'd been given sedatives because the weight on his shoulders was just too heavy. His body too weak to dance anymore. In the space of the last month, Eren felt like he'd lost everything. Then there was the fact Eren was coming off his tablets. His system would be completely out of whack. He needed help. Laying Eren down in the recovery position, he stripped his towel off and shoved it between his legs. Jogging across the room, he snatched his phone up, a stuttering mess as he called through to emergency services for an ambulance. Leaving the call connected, he then found up the first pair of pants he could. He desperately wanted to comfort Viren, but he needed to check Eren's vitals. With the combination of Eren's pants already being wet, slick and blood, he couldn't gauge the bleed... but it was entirely possible, and more than likely, that Eren was losing the pup. Kneeling down, he placed his palm of Eren's forehead as he double checked his mate still had a pulse. Whining for him, Eren curled around himself though out of it "Brat. Come on, open those bright eyes for me. Come on, baby. I need you to look at me" "Mummy!" Fuck. The pills... had Eren already? He'd told Viren he'd be better soon? Scrambling across the floor, Levi pulled the blister tray from the box. Both pills still inside. He hadn't... he'd wanted to... but he hadn't. Eren had wanted to tell him. He was getting the box to tell him. He'd let his anger get the better of him. Shit. Shit. Shit. He knew Eren was in a fragile state of mind... he shouldn't have pushed. He shouldn't have blown things out of proportion. He should have listened to his mate. Eren very well may have told him about the drinks thing when they went to the bar... but if he hadn't pushed, he wouldn't haven't have known that Eren thought he cheated on him. He wouldn't haven't known the pain his mate felt. Jealousy and pain carving themselves soul deep as Eren tried not to be abandoned by him... Maybe... He didn't like seeing Eren suffer, but without the medication coursing through his system, his omega had opened up to him again... his yoyoing emotions making it impossible for Eren to calmly sit down and explain things, because he simply wasn't able to right now. He hadn't wanted to be angry. He hadn't wanted to fight. He was just struggling to figure out how to make Levi and Viren happy, like he always did, leaving him with the weight of the world on his fragile shoulders "Mummy... mum!" Viren pulled him back to reality. Ok. Ok. He needed to approach this the way he was trained, and not like the untrained ape he was currently doing the world's greatest impression of. First. Unlock the door. Eren was in the recovery position. His airways were clear, and he had a pulse. His heart was racing, but he was still breathing. Second. Viren. Viren was just a child. He didn't understand. He saw the blood and knew mummy was hurt... Shit. In the few moments it'd taken him to open the door, his son had made it to Eren's side. Pulling him back, he held him to his chest. Making sure the boy was facing away from Eren. He couldn't stop a miscarriage, he didn't have anything to do anything about it with. He didn't even have his first aid kit... Viren. He had to protect his son from seeing his mother like this. Eren would never forgive him if he did. Kissing the pup's hair, he cursed the ambulance for taking so fucking long. He knew something was wrong. He knew it. He should have made Eren go to hospital. He should have been there when he collapsed. Hanji had said Eren asked for him. Had he wanted to tell him then? His mate would have been terrified. He should have dragged him there by the hair if he'd had to, when Eren didn't start improving. Did Hanji know? She'd gone with him... Why hadn't she said anything? She was able to get more out of Eren than he was these days and holy fuck... his omega's pain was ebbing through their bond. Levi seriously felt like was about to shit himself with the pressure and cramps that seemed to be forming in his gut. Finally the sound of sirens reached his ears. Viren was still crying hysterically in his arms. It was another 10 minutes before help finally arrived. As the two EMT's entered the room, Levi explained the situation to them. His alpha leaving everything he was saying curt to and the point. He wanted to snap the arm of the first woman who placed her hand on Eren's shoulder. No one should be handling his mate, except for him. No one. Within minutes, Eren was on the gurney, Levi needing to ride along as he had no idea where Paradis's hospital was. He barely thought to grab his phone and Eren's wallet off the bedside table. His own buried somewhere in the things still packed from the beach. His feet felt like lead, his head swimming as he followed Eren out, people having gathered to witness what the fuck was going on. Eren would have loathed all the attention directed his way. His heart so precious, he would have hated even the thought of causing inconvenience. Eren didn't stir during the hospital ride, Viren cocooned in Levi's lap crying softly, as he watched every single move the EMT made. Mike and Erwin wed on the 21st of August, so that was the rough date of conception, 11 weeks ago... 11 weeks... Just shy of 12. It was like Eren's first pregnancy all over again. He'd missed the start, even though he was right beside him. Arriving at the hospital, Eren was whisked away from him. Levi feeling a little lost until an attending nurse came over to him to collect Eren's medical history. He didn't even know the name of the pills his mate had been taking... giving her the name of Eren's doctor, she promised to check, giving him a sympathetic smile as she did. Evicted out to the waiting room, his mind was still a muddled mess of self loathing... but there were things to do. Pulling his phone out, he called Hanji. The woman taking a frustratingly long time to answer, sounding as if she'd just woken. Launching straight into explanation, his voice trembled. He'd lost a pup he hadn't even known about... and his alpha was mourning that loss as of the poor little thing as if it had been birthed. Eren was going to be distraught. He didn't deserve this or the weeks of suffering it'd brought him. How could his omega think that he wouldn't be excited?! He loved Viren and he loved Eren. It may not have been planned, but the idea of expanding their family filled him with pride. He was at the stage where he could tolerate moving to the suburbs. A house with space to move, a backyard for the kids to play in... though, he didn't think he could part with the apartment. He'd kept it because it was a home with Eren. Every time his omega wandered off, he always knew Levi was waiting there for him. Lost his own thoughts, he forgot he was on the phone to Hanji. Hanji repeating his name over and over until he grunted in acknowledgement, then promising to head down to help out with Viren. Eren probably wouldn't be feeling very holidayee, and incredibly tender, both emotionally and physically, over the next few days, possibly the next fortnight until the miscarriage had passed. * Waking up confused, Eren whined softly. His head felt like it was filled with cotton wool, and he couldn't quite remember how he'd gotten to wherever he was, only that the was clearly no longer in the hotel with Levi. Whining again, Levi appeared at his side. His alpha's large, cool palm felt wonderful against his head "Hey, Eren. How do you feel?" "Thick... I can't think" Nuzzling into Levi's touch, his alpha sank down on the edge of his bed "Do you remember what happened? We were fighting in the hotel?" Eren blinked at Levi, right... he was going to tell Levi was he pregnant... then... The pups... he'd started bleeding. His confused green eyes filled with sorry "Shhh... shhh. It's ok" "I'm sorry... I..." "You wanted to tell me. I know. I didn't figure out until after I yelled at you. I'm so sorry, Eren. I'm so sorry I yelled" "'s ok..." "No it's not. Eren, I promise, I never cheated on you. And I know you didn't cheat on me, right?" He was too tired for this "Lee... no... I can't think" "Sorry, br-Eren. I had to tell you" "Am I dying?" "No. No, you're not..." "Viren's presents are in the top of my wardrobe... and yours..." "Eren, shhh. You're going to just fine" "But the..." "We're still waiting for the results. They only just let me back in to see you" "Viren?" "He's sleeping next to you" Eren couldn't find the strength to look down, even moving his arm was hard as hell. He was so warm and tired... other than his head, he couldn't feel the rest of him. It was nice to be pain free. Taking his hand, Levi placed it on Viren's soft hair "He's been crying for you" "He shouldn't be here" "Hanji is coming down to take care of him. It's fine... ok. It's all organised" "I'm sorry" "No. This isn't your fault. Ok?" "Did I... did..." He was so fucking confused... and really sleepy. Whining softly, he didn't know what he wanted to say "You're ok. Just rest" "Lee... stay?" "You want me to stay? I'm not going anywhere" "Hold me?" That's what he wanted. He wanted to be in Levi's arms. His omega was stuffed right back under all that cotton wool, but they both wanted Levi to take whatever was happening away "Ok. I need to move Viren. You've got two IV lines running into the cannula in your left arm. They had to give you a blood transfusion, because you're so weak" "'m sorry" Leaning in, Levi kissed him. Eren was sure, if he could be sure, that his mouth was taste revolting. He was too tired to think about it. Nuzzling into his forehead, Levi sighed softly "I love you so much. I never ever meant to hurt you. You're my everything. I'm completely and totally Erensexual for you, my Shitty Brat"

[silvana-fangirls]

Target [Dabi x ua!Reader]  Chapter 4.

Hey there, boys and girls :) I'm so sorry this took a bit longer than promised, but yesterday as soon as I got home from college I collapsed in my bed and I forgot to post this.

Anyways, PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU START:

-Time lapses may be a little bit fucked up but just because I needed to change them to fit in the story better! So, if something seems out of place, it's probably that - Also guys, I've got the amazing oportunity to get my OC (the girl I imagine when I write this) drawn by an incredible artist. Of course, this is a Reader Insert so you don't have to imaine her as I do but if you could please chec it out it'll mean a lot to me! He's also drawn his OC Ren thats really similar to mine (in quirk abd stuff) and he looks crazy good as well :) You can check them out on this link His tumblr acc is @unlikelypickle and you should def follow him and check out his amazing art :)

There are more notes at the end!

Links to:

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

Read it in (AO3)

Or below the cut

No one moved for a moment.

While Dabi appeared to be in a calm manner, he was in high alert, waiting for any movement and he could tell the rest of them were the same.

All eyes were on the angry kid, particularly on his still smoking hands.

The silence caused by the situation allowed everyone on the room to listen clearly at the still going interview.

“Mr. Eraserhead” A man said. “You claimed it was for the student’s safety… but in the middle of it all, you urged your students to fight” He added. “What were your intentions at that point?”

If it wasn’t because of the little explosions that started to go off from Bakugou’s hand, Dabi would surely have turned to the T.V. to listen what possible retarded excuse could the Pros have for the incident.

“Since we had no way of grasping the full nature of the situation I made that decision in an attempt to avoid the worst-case scenario” Eraserhead answered.

“The worst-case scenario?” The man almost snorted loudly. “How else would you describe a situation where 26 of your students were wounded and two of them were kidnapped?”

“At that moment, the worst case I could imagine involved the deaths of my students” Eraserhead said glaring at the man.

‘We should’ve killed someone’

The man stood quiet.

“It became clear that the gas responsible for most of the harm was a villain’s quirk –one with a soporific effect” The Principal said. “Kendo’s and Tetsutetsu’s quick thinking was responsible for minimizing the damage. The students have all received psychological evaluations, and none of them seem to have emotional trauma”

“Is that meant to be a silver lining?” The man asked sarcastically.

“We believe that the worst has been avoided as long as the students still have their futures” The Principal answered.

The man stood quiet for a moment before glancing at the U.A.’s representatives dangerously and spoke:

“Can you say the same about young Bakugou, who was abducted?” He asked in a calm manner. “He won your Sports Festival” He started. “He struggled valiantly and fearlessly against a powerful villain during the sludge incident. His impressive record implies the making of a tough, powerful hero, yet… He showed a rather violent side of himself after his Festival victory. An attitude that persisted up through the awards ceremony” He explained. “We’ve already caught glimpses, here and there, of his mental instability”

Dabi saw how Bakugou went rigid at that, he clenched his teeth and knuckles but remained in fighting stance.

“Or better yet…” The man said once again. “What about (Y/LN) (Y/N)?” He asked. “The daughter of two of the most dangerous villains the country’s ever had. Villains, that I may add, were ruthless, sadistic and clearly mentally unstable” He added. “How does someone with roots like those even ends up in the U.A.?” He asked. “How can you assure us that she doesn’t have the same beliefs as her parents? How can you assure us that she won’t end up just like them? Are you really expecting us to believe that she was kidnapped by chance?”

The whole press started murmuring.

“You can’t honestly expect us to believe that all these qualities, from both kidnaped students, are mere coincidences?” He asked. “What if a skilled manipulator gets to them and sends them both down to the past of evil? Can you provide ‘proof’ as you say that both of them still have a future?”

Eraserhead instantly shot up and bowed, glaring at the man murderously.

“Any lapse in the behavior of our students is our failing” He said. “Still, regarding Bakugou… He behaved that way at the Sports Festival because he has such strong convictions and ideals. More than anyone, he pursues the tittle of Top Hero with everything he’s got.” He added. “If the villains have mistaken that for weakness, then their thought process is indeed superficial… Regarding (Y/LN) (Y/N), even if I’m not her teacher, all I can say is: there’s classified things you don’t know about. You don’t know how it all went down. If she’s in the U.A. now, it’s all thanks to the convictions and ideals she’s pursuing”

“You got that, you fucking scumbags!?” Bakugou’s voice roared as he cracked his knuckles. “Just so you know... Technically I’ve still got permission to fight back!”

‘Something’s wrong with this kid’ Dabi thought. Maybe that man wasn’t so wrong when he talked about his mental instability.

“This boy really seems to understand his position! Clever little thing!” Magne said, quite perturbed about Bakugou’s antics.

“Can I stab him?” Toga asked, looking at Bakugou with her typical chirpiness.

“No, you idiot” Dabi said, eyes not leaving Bakugou.

“Why don’t you just pretend that we’d won you over? I don’t understand!” Mr. Compress said and Dabi agreed with him.

It’ll be easier to just pretend to agree and escape later.

“I don’t fucking lie about anything” Bakugou said. “Enough of this bullshit. I’m not in the mood to hang around this nasty dump anymore. Untie her, now!” He screamed at Shigaraki, but he was still standing in the same position, looking at the hand.

“You mustn’t, Shigaraki Tomura, calm yourself!” Kurogiri said, charging towards Bakugou and Shigaraki.

Only then Shigaraki turned to glare at Bakugou, making him take a step back with widened eyes.

“Stay back… all of you” Shigaraki said and calmly picked up the hand that was on the floor. “This kid…” he said, and placed the hand on his face again. “…Is an important pawn.” He sighed. “I wish you would’ve at least listened to me. I thought we might understand each other…”

“Nope” Bakugou simply said. “Don’t make me repeat it. Let her go!” He ordered.

“Why?” Shigaraki said. “We haven’t talked with her yet, maybe she wants to join us”

“Like hell she does” Bakugou spat. “Those restrains are proof enough. It’s clear that she didn’t came here fucking willingly”

“We just needed to make sure she’s got to listen to what we have to say” Shigaraki simply said.

“Haven’t you heard the fucking interview? Her answer will be no”

“Don’t be naïve, boy. She was raised by villains after all” Mr. Compress said.

“I think she deserves a chance to hear us out just like you did” Shigaraki said.

“Okay, that’s it” And Bakugou lunged at him once again; hand ready to create another big explosion.

Shigaraki managed to dodge this time making Bakugou direct his attack too close to the girl; and even if the explosion itself didn’t hurt her or touched her whatsoever, the loud noise near her made her jump awake.

All eyes were directed to her.

Dabi saw how her widened eyes started to look everywhere; disorientation and confusion clear in them. She was breathing so erratically that for a moment, her breathing was the only sound filling the room.

After her frenetically scan, her eyes landed on Dabi for a moment. He could tell that she held back a gasp and she tried to make a move to back off but her restrains stopped her.

Her eyebrows frowned at that and she looked down at her body… tied up, trapped in a chair.

“…What?” Dabi heard her mutter under her breath. She started to shake her arms in order to free herself but there was no use.

With now panicked eyes, she looked at him again for a moment to then look around the room.

It was only when her gaze met Bakugou’s that she seemed to understand what was actually happening.

“What the he-“ She tried to say but was interrupted by a yelp coming from her mouth as she winced. She tried to move her arms to touch her head but she was cut short by the chains. It was only then when she realized that there was something tightly tied around her head.

Dabi was pleased to see that it was working to keep up her pain.

“So, the sleeping beauty finally awakes” Shigaraki said and started to walk towards where she was.

“HEY, back of-“ Bakugou roared but Dabi had enough of his bullshit so he cut him short by grabbing him by the nape of his neck, heating up his hands just enough to make sure he got the ‘One more move and I roast you’ message.

(Y/N) gave Bakugou a quick side glance but then turned her eyes to Shigaraki, trying to keep up a threatening look.

“Where am I?” She asked with what Dabi thought was the calmer tone of voice she could manage at the moment. “Why am I here?”

“You’re here because we wanna discuss something with you” Shigaraki said, purposely ignoring her first question.

Her eyes narrowed and she gritted her teeth.

“I already know what it is, and I’m not interested” She said firmly. “I’ve already told one of your minions what my answer was.” Dabi held back a snort at this ‘Minion?’ He thought as he continued to keep a firm grip on Bakugou’s nape ‘This girl is something else, gotta give her that’. “So, if you already know, why am I here?” She asked again.

“Mind manipulation” Dabi simply said, already feeling Shigaraki’s gaze on him.

It’s not that he felt the need to give any explanations, but just so everyone knew that he wasn’t an idiot that just blurted out their plan to her.

Shigaraki’s gaze turned to her again and he kneeled down to her level.

“Fascinating” Shigaraki said, observing her.

(Y/N) Backed off as much as she could and she sent another quick glance at Bakugou.

“So, her answer was ‘No’?” Magne asked Dabi, clearly confused as to why. Dabi didn’t answer, he just kept his focus on Shigaraki and the chained uo girl.

“I thought that a few words were gonna be able to convince you” Shigaraki said, looking at her. “But I gotta admit that it’s also kind of satisfying to see you play hard to get. Dabi said you were quite a pain” Dabi rolled his eyes at this.

‘I didn’t say that’ But of course Shigaraki would use everything he could to make him look less.

“I know how you feel” Shigaraki continued. “I know how people judge you, I know how you always go straight home from school and how you have to go as undercover as possible to do simple things as grocery shopping or laundry. I’ve seen you. I’ve observed you for quite a while”

‘And that’s not creepy at all’ he could tell she was thinking the same thing by how she tried to distance herself even more from him and looked away. ‘Is he trying to recruit her or to freak her out?’ He sighed at how stupid some people could be.

“Doesn’t it make you angry? Seeing how your life turned out to after what those heroes did to your parents?” Her eyes widened slightly at this and she snapped her head to him again. “How those merciless heroes murdered them?”

“SHUT UP!” She screamed, boiling rage clear in her eyes. “You have NO idea of what you’re talking about”

“I don’t?” Shigaraki asked incredulously. “That’s exactly how it went down, everyone saw it” He snorted. “The heroes were ruthless. All Might was ruthless... they didn’t even give your parents a chanc-“

“The heroes didn’t do anything. If they’re dead now, it’s because they were villains. That’s fucking it. It was their fault!” She shouted again.

Dabi had to admit he was a bit taken aback by it all. Yes, she’d already said that when they were fighting in the forest but he hasn’t really put much thought into it back then. Plus, he also thought that since Shigaraki said she was forced to enroll the U.A., maybe the pros kinda got to her or they convinced her to think that way.

But watching her now, anger in her eyes and even a bit of shame, it was kinda weird. It was almost as if she didn’t want to talk about the subject but not exactly because she felt sad about it.

“You can’t possibly mean that” Shigaraki said at first. “They were your parents, and they raised you to be a villain”

“Are you serious, girly? Heroes were glorified that day for taking the lives of your parents, yet when a villain kills someone they get condemned by people! Having to face years of imprisonment or worst” Magne exclaimed offended.

“Plus they got unimaginable prizes and rewards for it; it was all over the media. Heroes are only working for fame and money nowadays. Getting paid for some of the same atrocities ‘villains’ do, getting praised” Spinner added too. “The Hero Killer Stain taught us-“

“I don’t care what he taught you” She said, cutting him off.

“You don’t care? You don’t care about how society praises ‘heroes’ that are just as ruthless as some villains? You don’t care about how the ones that are ‘less’ are immediately tossed aside by society? You don’t care about how people judge you when they don’t even know you?” Shigaraki asked offended.

“You are judging me without even knowing me!” She pointed out.

“I seriously can’t understand you. Your parents raised you to be a villain” Shigaraki said in disbelief.

“I didn’t know I was forced to be whatever my parents wanted me to” She spat.

That did strike a chord in Dabi.

The way those words hit him almost made him tense up… almost.

He narrowed her eyes ever so slightly as he observed her and he kinda wanted to smack himself for not recognizing his same own ‘feelings’ in her eyes.

Shame, anger, disgust, rejection, hatred.

Apparently he was right when he thought this girl was something else. Now he knew for a fact that she won’t ever agree to join them.

He almost just wanted to unchain her and let her go do whatever she was doing to make her parents writhe on their graves.

Almost, but not quite. His mission was way more important and he knew for a fact that whether she agreed to join them or not, keeping her here with them kept on making the society turn against the heroes more and more as each second passed by.

The more time the Pros took to ‘rescue’ their students –if they even manage to do it- the closer the villains were from reaching their goal.

Shigaraki finally stood up from his kneeling position and looked down at her with what seemed to be a smile.

“I really wanna kill her” Toga commented after a while. Dabi was quite surprised to see actual hatred in her golden eyes.

“Don’t worry sweetie. In time, you’ll change your mind” He said to the chained girl as he grabbed her chin and pulled her as close as he could to him.

“DON’T TOUCH HER YOU IDIOT!” Bakugou screamed as he attempted to lunge at him, but Dabi shot a small yet dangerous flame from the palm that was holding his neck making Bakugou scream in pain.

(Y/N) gasped horrified, even if she couldn’t move her chin, she saw from the corner of her eye what happened.

“STOP IT!” She pleaded.

Shigaraki finally let go of her chin and turned to Bakugou. “Same goes for you”

“Fuck you” Was his reply that came out in pained grunts.

“I can’t waste much more time in this, not now at least” Shigaraki said. “We all heard about the heroes’ investigation, so we have to lay low and be careful” He explained. “Magne and Compress, you’re gonna watch the base from outside. Get rid of any possible threat without getting noticed. Don’t let them see you” He ordered and Magne and Compress left the room. “Toga you’re going to go downtown see if you can find any more information about whatever the heroes plan to do be sure to use your quirk discreetly and please act as sane as you can” Toga nodded eagerly and left as well. “Spinner you go to the rooftop. Keep watch from up there and be sure to remain out of sight. Dabi, tie up Bakugou again. You won’t be able to go out since you can’t possibly hide those nasty scars of yours. When you’re done go meet us behind. Kurogiri and I will be searching for someplace new to hide, at least until these two agree with us”

Kurogiri and Shigaraki left the room after that, leaving only Dabi and the two kids inside.

Dabi started to drag Bakugou back to his restraining chair, and to his surprise he didn’t put up a fight.

Both of them were quiet but he could almost feel their hate towards him.

Being careful not to get caught, he could see her eyes trained on nothing more than Bakugou the entire time he was chaining him. He could see her eyes traveling from Bakugou’s face to the now burnt flesh in his nape and vice versa.

He didn’t really agree to leave them alone and unguarded, but he wasn’t going to stay and babysit either. So, once he was done he exited the room leaving the door open.

But instead of walking down the hall to where Kurogiri and Shigaraki were, he stood quietly hiding from their sights.

“You okay?” Bakugou said after a while, not quite whispering but certainly not loud enough either.

It took some time for her to reply.

“I had better days” She said at first before grunting in pain. ‘Probably caused by the leather still tied to her head’ Dabi thought. “I’m fine” She assured. “Are you okay, though?” She asked.

“It’s nothin’” Bakugou said. “I’m used to burns”

They didn’t say anything more for a few seconds.

“Don’t worry” Bakugou said. “We’ll get outta here”

To that, she didn’t reply.

-

She couldn’t describe how she was feeling. All of her was filled with dread, anger, impotence… But, most of all, guilt.

She couldn’t stay and just do nothing.

She’s always considered herself a ‘correct’ girl. She always did what she was told, she’d always done things the ‘good’ way, and she’d always beat up every single expectation people had for her. She was a good girl.

But now, she was going to break the rules.

It didn’t matter what it could cost her, the guilt was consuming her and doing something was better than sitting and wait.

After all, she was the one that let her go to the woods on her own, for Christ’s sake.

Kendo felt absolutely devastated when they first told her, she didn’t even believe it at first.

“It’s not only Bakugou, Kendo. (Y/LN) is missing too” was what her classmates had told her once the paramedics finished checking her out that horrid day, and the first thing that came to her was how she offered to go to the woods with her and how easily she let her go alone after she refused just once.

Maybe if she’d insisted a bit more she will be here safe and sound today. Maybe if she’d insisted a bit more they could’ve fight the villain that abducted her; Or maybe they could’ve been in this together now.

She was painfully aware of (Y/LN)’s past, as everyone was. Everyone knew what happened to her since almost everyone probably saw it on T.V. or at least re-watched it somewhere else. Everyone knew who she was, even if she’d hardly spoken to anyone till this day.

Kendo knew she lived alone and she knew that other than her, she didn’t have any friends.

They were barely even friends to begin with.

Kendo knew that she had no one waiting for her to be found, waiting for her to be free. There was no one truly waiting for her other than Kendo herself.

Kendo also knew how some of her own classmates already thought that (Y/N) has joined The League of Villains.

She couldn’t believe how blind they were.

Still, that didn’t matter now. What did matter was the fact that while visiting some of her hospitalized classmates, she’d heard something.

She marched quickly to the hospital; she’d be dammed if they’ve already left without her. She needed to hurry.

Luckily, Kirishima’s red head came to view once she neared the hospital.

She run to them and they all became rigid.

“H-Hey, Kendo!” Midoriya stuttered. Trying to pretend as if nothing was happening and failing miserably.

“I know what you’re up to” Kendo ignored them and turned to everyone.

They were all about to make up excuses but she spoke again.

“I want in” She demanded.

They all stood in shock for a moment.

“Okay” Midoriya said.

“We’ll be leaving tomorrow night” Todoroki added.

 Notes:

I really liked this chapter tbh, I hope you did too :)

Anyways i know I said we'll get some backstory in this chapter and we got a bit of it, but not all. Next chapter we'll be diving in the Reader's P.O.V. again and we'll get the whole story (so don't freak out just yet) and we'll get to know what she thinks about all of this too.

Second thing, I’m going with the Dabi is a Todoroki theory mainly because Dabi is such an incomplete character rn and it’s very difficult to understand him since we really know nothing about him

Also, if you're wondering why Bakugou didn't try to fight them (at least not in his carelessly way) it's because she was still chained up and while he could've fight them (and possibly believe that he could've win) she was still trapped and being the hero in training he is he refused to leave her (and he didn't want the villains to hurt her either just because of him)

The new chapter's gonna be up after Saturday so I don't spoil the people that didn't read the manga.

Thoughts? :)

tag list: @buckybear97 @this-lost-child @aebeessun @ye-rinn@ihatemyselftoinfinityandbeyond @cindxalex @luvley-shadow@taeniix @roadtripsonspaceships @iana-therese @darkagedoctor

(let me know if you want to be added to the tag list)

Do I continue this or nah?

[yukiwrites]

Time for a Happy Hunt

Thank you for commissioning me, Anon! I’m sorry for the delay and I hope you like it! ;D

Summary: Keaton was still the leader of the wolfskin back at Mount Garou, even after Kamui’s coronation as Queen of Valla. That meant that he would often travel back to his home to whip them into shape. One night, however, he comes home to hear wonderful news...

Commission info HERE and HERE!

Part 1 - Part 2

As Queen of Valla, it wasn't viable for Kamui to leave the Silent Kingdom to live with her beloved Keaton all the way up at Mount Garou. She planned to go one day, of course, once all the Sealing Rituals were done.

However, for the time being, they had to make do by opening a portal at the foot of the Mount that led straight to the inner garden of Castle Gyges.

As leader of the wolfskin, Keaton was frequently summoned back home to take on any aspiring cubs intent on taking him down from leadership. The strongest would always be the leader of the pack, after all. Although no one had managed to land a single blow to him for the three years following the war, he always welcomed a challenge.

He would also lead raids in search of treasure as well as hunts for colossal animals. He was about to get ready for one that would take at least a week to complete, using the remaining time to snuggle and sniff his wife.

Ticklish, Kamui giggled as her husband sniffed her neck and back of her ear, hugging her from behind. "K-Keaton, I can't laugh anymore...!"

He nipped her earlobe, licking it afterward. "Your smell's been different lately, Kamui. Didja do something? Eat anythin' strange? Or use a different, yuck, perfume?" He licked her entire neck, biting her trapezius so it would leave a mark.

"Eh? Do I stink? N-no, get away...!" She clutched her heart, worried that he'd find her disgusting.

"No way!" He bit harder, sucking so as to leave a love bite. "It's not bad, it's just different is all. I like it. Your taste is still the same, too." His hands groped her body from under her sleeping gown, making the Queen flinch with sudden pleasure.

"You pervert..." she pouted, tilting her head to the side so he could keep on licking and biting her, pulling her hair out of the way.

"It's meal time!" His tail wagged as he threw his wife on the bed, getting ready for yet another night of wild love.

After the following morning, they would part ways for over a week, after all, so they needed to bask in each other's warmth for as much as they could.

As a nocturnal beast, Keaton left hours before sunrise, his instincts blaring him to return with a fine haul for his wife. He didn't understand the urge to come back quickly, but he wasn't about to object to his instinct of all things.

Hours later, Kamui woke up to a cold bed, feeling fulfilled and lonely at the same time. Rough as her beloved was, she would feel him with her whole body for a few days, but she already dreaded the moment she started longing for him.

Distracted, it took her twice as long than usual to complete her duties, her mind somehow foggy and her body heavy.

"Are you feeling unwell, milady?" Jakob asked as he poured the afternoon tea, placing one hand over her forehead to check her temperature. "It doesn't seem to be a fever..."

The Queen sighed, sipping the piping hot tea. "I'm fine, Jakob, just a bit tire-ugh..." She grimaced, putting the cup away. "What blend is this? It tastes," she groaned, "I-I can't drink this, Jakob. Take it away, p-please, I don't feel..." Kamui placed one hand over her mouth, her entire body rejecting even the beverage's smell.

"M-milady!" Jakob ran to his liege, placing one hand behind her back. "F-forgive me, my lady! I must've messed up-"

"It's okay, j-just take it away..."

"At once, Lady Kamui!" Jakob stuttered, swiftly cleaning the table. Once he placed the cart outside, he came back, apologetic. "Would like to lie down for a bit? You're pale!"

Huffing and nauseated, Kamui accepted the butler's extended hand. "I will. Thank you, Jakob, and forgive me for the trouble."

"It's no trouble at all, milady. Do find it in your heart to forgive this absurd blunder of mine." He guided her to the bed, worried for her health. "Should I bring my staff?"

Placing her head on the pillow, Kamui relaxed. "No need, Jakob. I'll just rest for a bit and go back to my duties. We had a sealing ritual scheduled for the day after tomorrow..."

"Perish the thought, milady! Think about your health first and foremost! I am certain that Lady Azura will not mind postponing the ritual should the need arise." He bowed. "I'll excuse myself now, however do call if you need anything."

The didn't wait for her reply and quickly left the room, ashamed for making his lady feel unwell. He tasted the tea himself a few minutes later, finding nothing wrong with it.

"I wonder fi it's simply not to Lady Kamui's liking any longer?" He wondered, pushing the cart back to the nearby pantry.

Discreet as he is, Jakob didn't mention Kamui's nausea so as not to rise unwanted attention to his lady. He would be the first one to step in should she feel worse, however.

The following day, Kamui felt oddly impatient regarding everything. Somehow, each little thing she did was a tad slower than she wanted it to. Why didn't she already finish writing that sentence? Why is that person with whom she was in a meeting with spoke so slowly? Why is the smell of tea so unpleasant lately? Why is the cake soggy? Why couldn't she just scream atop of her lungs to put everything working back at its usual place?

"Milady, you've been drumming your fingers for so long I fear that you'll scratch the table sooner or later." Jakob commented, learning his lesson and bringing coffee instead.

"I'm just- hahh... I'm sorry, Jakob. I've been irritable lately. I thought it was only for today, but now that I think back -- I've been feeling antsy for a few weeks already." She sighed, relishing on the coffee's bitter taste.

"I wish I could do more, milady. I fear that you are too burdened as Queen." He humbly bowed.

Feeling bad for making him worry, Kamui clutched her chest. "It's okay, Jakob. I'm sorry for dumping all this on you. I'll... be okay." She breathed heavily. "This coffee is making me feel better, already! Thank you so much for all the little things you do."

Moved to tears, jakob hid his face under his bangs. "You flatter me, milady. However I am overjoyed that today's drink is to your liking."

"Oh... Sorry again about yesterday." She placed the cup on its saucer. "I'm sure it was a blend I usually drink since it was you who brought it, but somehow I couldn't even be near it without feeling nauseous."

"Hm...?" Jakob narrowed his eyes, wondering about such strange symptom. He shook his head moments after, dismissing such silly thoughts.

"Alright, bring it on! I'll do better today, you'll see!" Kamui puffed her chest, feeling recharged. "Can you bring me a slice of that special cake you made the day before yesterday? Suddenly I feel like eating it."

"Of course, milady. However, only after dinner. You've had your fill of sweets for the afternoon."

Kamui grumbled. "Alright."

Hearing about the cake from the servants, Camilla used that as an excuse to visit her beloved little sister. "Aren't you lonely, darling? I hear Keaton is quite insensitive... leaving you by yourself for days at a time! The audacity!" The princess held Kamui's hand, slightly pouting her lips.

"W-well, I'd be lying if I said that I don't feel lonely at all, but... But I fell in love with his free spirit and wildness." The Queen poked at her cake with the fork, relishing on all the delicious spread melting right off of it. "B-besides, he makes it up with me when he... comes back..." increasingly embarrassed by what she was saying, Kamui lowered her head to hide her rosy cheeks.

"My, oh my! The fire of youth!" Camilla chuckled, putting a tuft of hair behind her ear. "Be sure to tell him how you feel, dear. I'm afraid you married a man that won't notice things unless they're expressly thrown into his face."

Kamui snorted, almost spiting the cake she munched. "Y-you're right on that." She gulped everything down with a large sip of coffee, feeling refreshed. "I'll be okay. Thank you so much for the visit, Big Sister."

"Anytime, my dear." Camilla pinched Kamui's cheek. "Should I sleep with you tonight? I'm sure your bed's cold without your little wolfskin to warm it for you."

"N-no, I'll be okay-" Kamui shook her head, but suddenly felt a carving for human affection and lowered her head. "Actually... maybe you should."

Camilla's fork fell out of her hand in surprise. "Indeed?! Ah, darling! How long has it been since you allowed me to sleep over!" She wrapped both arms around Kamui, squeezing the dragon Queen on her chest. "I'll warm you through the entire night, you hear?"

Mildly regretting the decision, Kamui laughed nervously as the air was robbed of her. "A-alright, Big Sister..."

Camilla wasn't lying when she said that: she hugged Kamui senseless through the entire night, carefully rubbing one hand up and down the Queen's back. It was a night Kamui wasn't used to, but one she didn't wish it hadn't happened.

However, once morning came, she felt nausea hit her so hard she had to quickly jump out of the bed (over Camilla, as well) towards the latrines. She threw everything up, coughing nervously. "W-was it the cake? But I felt fine eating it..." She commented with a hoarse voice once Camilla worriedly brought her a glass of water.

"Darling, how long have you felt this way? Tell your big sister everything."

Pensive, Kamui placed the glass away and tried to remember how often that's been happening. "Actually, this isn't the first time I throw up in the morning, but it always happens whenever Keaton isn't here, so I never really noticed them..."

Camilla nodded, holding Kamui's hand. "What else?"

"U-um... that's it? I don't think I felt particularly strange... Oh."

"Hmm?" Camilla's grin grew. If her suspicions were correct, she would finally be an aunt!

"I've been irritable lately, but again it's only when Keaton isn't here. I also can't drink tea anymore."

"Mhm, I noticed how you had Jakob serve coffee yesterday instead of your usual blend of tea." Camilla hummed. "My dear, I believe we should call a healer as soon as possible! I am absolutely sure you are pregnant!"

If she had still been holding the glass, it would've shattered on the floor. "P-pregnant? B-but..." she remembered all of the wild nights she had with her husband, clearly not throwing that possibility away. "I'm...? With Keaton's...?"

"Child, yes!" Camilla hugged her sister, rubbing Kamui's face on her chest. "What joy! Call the healers at once!" She laughed, so very much looking forward to smothering a little wolf baby with everything she had.

Shocked, it took Kamui a few moments to compose herself before a wide smile took ahold of her face. "A baby!"

Somehow, with the confirmation of her pregnancy, it was as though the other unpleasant symptoms has lessened: she didn't feel as irritably as before, the joy of expecting Keaton's baby making her hop instead of walking. She performed the Sealing Ritual as expected, feeling renewed and refreshed.

Soon it was time for Keaton to return, and Kamui eagerly waited by the portal at the garden. Fidgety, she turned her weight from one foot to the other until Keaton jumped out of the portal, huffing. "Keaton!"

"Kamui?! You waited for me?" He leaped in her arms, licking her face all the way to her lips, deeply kissing them.

Losing the strength on her legs, Kamui wrapped both arms around Keaton's neck, losing herself on his wild kiss. "K-Keaton, I have something-"

"Mhmmm... your smell's getting better and better everyday..." He hummed, sniffing her neck and pulling her up with both arms.

Then it hit her: maybe he'd been smelling their BABY instead! "Keaton? How long have you been smelling this different smell on me?" She pulled his hair so he would detach himself from her and look her in the eyes.

Wagging his tail, he pouted as he searched in his memory. "Hm... I dunno, about two months? Maybe more? Why'd you ask?"

"You buffoon!" Kamui laughed, nudging his shoulders. "You've been smelling my pregnancy this whole time, silly!"

"Preg-" With a frozen smile on his face, he tilted his head to the side, still not fully understanding.

"Maybe you've never been around pregnant women? I'm sure you'd be able to tell the difference once you've caught a smell."

"B-back up, Kamui. You're- mine- A PUP?!" He yelled, brusquely lifting her overhead, twirling around himself. "MINE?! A PUP!!" He laughed. "AROOOOOO!!"

"K-Keaton, people are sleeping, hahah!" She tried to cover his mouth, but he simply put her on the floor and transformed, running around her while he howled.

"WAIT HERE!" He huffed, jumping back into the portal.

"Keaton-" Barely was his name out of her mouth, he came back, holding some kind of an animal's colossal leg on his mouth. "Let's have a feast to make our pup's stronger!"

"W-what kind of animal is this?!" Kamui marveled. Only the leg was as large as he own dragon form.

"I dunno! It was flying around Mount Garou and we decided to hunt it! Now, let's eat!"

"I'm not eating it raw, you silly man!" Kamui laughed at his eagerness. "Why don't you take me back to your village so we can all eat together?"

"AND TELL EVERYONE ABOUT MY PUP! AROOOO!" He ran in circles, dragging the giant leg around Kamui. "Hop on! We're running full speed back to the mount!" He huffed, his giant eyes sparkling with glee.

Laughing, Kamui climbed on her husband's back. "I love you!" She giggled, holding tightly as he sprinted towards the portal.

"Arooooooooooo!!!” He howled, letting his companions know he was coming. “I love you too! Arooo!" He said, uncharacteristically honest, too happy to pretend he didn’t care. "Tonight we party! It's my pup's celebration!"