Tumgik
#i'm so sorry anon if i've failed you <3
throwaway-yandere · 2 years
Note
Hi! Love your work so much and I adore the effort you put into your stuff. I'm making a genshin otome and was wondering if it'd be okay to ask for a promo of sorts in the future? It's absolutely completely 100% valid and understandable if you don't wish to promo other works in your own blog though! I just wanted to ask first for permission or whether it's okay or not! Thanks for reading! Love ya <3
Love your work so much
Press X to doubt, you sound saner than an average reader
Tumblr media
Okay kidding aside, I'm not exactly the most influential/popular person so I'm not sure how I'd be able to help but I can reblog it(?) for sure! I enjoy genshin and otome games so yeah!!! Even if you didn't read my works I'd still look forward to this lmao. Wish you the best in making the game <333
11 notes · View notes
sophietv · 1 year
Text
Everything you need to know : Failed Coming Out 2019
This is an answer to an anon I've received.
I typed it all and Tumblr said there was an error when I went and tried to published it. So I had to type it all again but lost the anon....
Here's the question: could you tell me more about her wanting to come out in 2019? sorry for asking again I'm new on the fandom!
Hi!
It will be my pleasure! This is such an important part of the Gaylor Lore to know and understand, especially when you are new in the fandom.
This theory has been confirmed, but we'll get to it in a minute.
Also, I'm so sorry because learning about what went down during Lover Era is a transformative experiece in the Gaylor fandom, in a very heartbreaking way.
So back in 2019 Taylor wanted to come out with the Lover Era.
June 30th during the New York City Pride wich was also the Stonewall's 50th anniversary, was supposed to be the day it happened.
This date might be familiar to you, because it's the date we learned at the same time as Taylor about her masters being sold to Scooter Braun.
So let's start at the begining of all of this. I won't go through ALL the details because my post will never end. But I'll cover the most important ones.
Right at the begining of the year, insiders were already talking about the fact that Taylor was planing to come out that year in podcasts and blind items.
Then in March 6th (Karlie and Taylor's anniversary)
Taylor does a post hinting at this new era. The very first lyrics we get (We got hints at ME back in February):
Tumblr media
Daylight the song is about Karlie. But this line specifically means coming out.
Stepping into the daylight, and letting everyone see the real you.
(Also worth noting the lesbian filter)
Taylor started being really loud in the posts she made from now on. Flagging rainbow, lesbian and bi colors every chances she got.
And flagging Butterflies. Wich is very important thematically in Lover and coming out.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Side note on the Butterfly meaning:
Remembre how in reputation, snake was a really important theme?
And how in Lover it switched to butterflies?
More specifically it switched to Snakes transforming into butterflies?
Tumblr media Tumblr media
There's a species of butterflies, that when they are in the chrysalid phase of their transformation into a butterfly, can look like a snake if they feel unsafe or attacked in order to protect themselves.
Tumblr media
Then, after the average 13 days waiting period, they transforms into a beautiful butterfly.
Basically what Taylor was doing, protecting herself during reputation with that "personna" like she described.
And now, she was ready to finally transforms and have a new beginning.
Here's a description of what butterflies means:
A powerful beacon of growth and new beginnings, the butterfly signifies the power of transformation and the incredible feats we can achieve when we trust ourselves. We all have the ability to listen to our innate wisdom, guide ourselves through difficult times, and emerge better and stronger than before.
Tumblr media
The ME! of it all:
Ok back into the Lover Era timeline!
So all those rainbow posts were leading up to the first single: ME!
Even Taylor Nation was pretty loud about this (number of rainbows = number of days leading to ME! release):
Tumblr media
3 days before ME! release, Taylor performs at the Time 100 Gala and it's the first and only time she switched so very clearly pronouns in the song, multiple times:
She sings repeatedly : I want HER midnights
And she even seems to be getting more and more confortable as the song goes on and singing it louder and louder.
She also looks at the crowd while singing it.
Then she releases ME!
That was really the first part of her coming out.
And honnestly, she shouldn't have had to do more than this.
ME! was released on April 26th.
April 26th in 2019 was Lesbian Visibility Day.
And she captionned the release with: ME! Out Now!
Tumblr media
A song about how she is unique as a Lover...
That is without mentioning the amount of rainbows everywhere in that MV as well as other references.
Worth noting that in 2019 Lil NasX came out in a MV with the rainbow tower and was annoyed that people didn't get it?
Tumblr media
Taylor also probably deadass thought that she made it obvious:
Tumblr media
May & June 2019 leading up to the big coming out:
Taylor continues to be as loud as she can.
She makes a very generous donation to GLAAD:
Tumblr media
She sings ME! every chances she gets, while flagging the Lesbian Flag.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Taylor Nation also keeps on being really loud:
Tumblr media
And releases a song and music video about homophobia and includes herself front and centered in the LGBTQ+ community (represented by the Trailer park, note how Ryan Reynolds, the only straight person in the MV is outside of this park, not in it like Taylor).
With a bi flag wig...
Tumblr media Tumblr media
So yeah, she was trying really hard to make people see her.
Christian Siriano and the dress...
Back in April, we learned that Christian Siriano (a fashion designer) was working on a project for Taylor:
Tumblr media
In June, he started teasing us about a mistery rainbow dress for an unnknown person:
Tumblr media
It was heavily rumored that it would be the dress used by Taylor to come out at the end of Pride Month.
He kind of confirmed it with this post:
Tumblr media
Then. June 30th.
The New York City Pride.
Taylor planned to come out at the event.
Employees on site, starts to be warned about this (you can find some comments online).
Taylor learns at the same time as us that her masters were sold to Scooter Braun.
She never makes it to Pride.
And Billy Porter ends up wearing the dress:
Tumblr media
But. You can see that the dress was not meant to be worn by him. It doesn't fit well and the "nude" parts shows that it was meant to be worn by a white person.
In 2022, Christian confirmed it by dueting a TikTok talking specifically about this.
He deleted it right after but you can still find it on TikTok: (X)
Last minutes changes to Lover:
We now know that Taylor scrapped two songs from Lover: All Of The Girls You Loved Before and Need.
All Of The Girls is really loud and very clearly talks about a girl. Wich Taylor couldn't afford if she didn't want to/couldn't come out.
London Boy was actually written and added really last minute to the album.
Really interesting, because this is her loudest song about her loving boyfriend. Wich is a brilliant thing to do if you want to limit the public speculation after all the flagging that you did...
We know it was last minute, because Taylor sampled it on Cold War from Cautious Clay. (X)
He was called in the middle of the night and had to approve the sample right away.
Interesting fact: Cold War was featured in Book Smart, a movie Taylor promoted that year.
The song plays during a lesbian sex scene...
The intro to London Boy is actually Idris Elba in a interview where he was talking about a charity where he sold a date with him.
You know, people paid to date him...
The shift in the Lover Era:
After this, you can start to see a shift. Where it was colorful sequin and rainbows everywhere with colorful choreography.
She now dresses in black, is incredibly sad and sings mostly accousting song.
Like her BBC 1 performance or Lover In Paris:
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Miss Americana:
Miss Americana was supposed to be her coming out documentary.
It has been confirmed by the director of the project that a lot of footage has been scrapped.
Also, the documentary was supposed to be called : Is It Cool That I Said All That?
This is why the documentary sometimes feels like something is missing and some parts are rushed.
They tried to switch her coming out approach by making it her political activism era.
Taylor confirms it in Anti-Hero MV:
youtube
She's pierced through the heart by The Archer.
Her queerness starts showing (she's bleeding lavender glitters).
She tries to cover it up by taking the table cloth.
Her wanting to cover it spoils the dinner for everyone and they leave her.
And while she sings : "Did you hear my covert narcissism I disguise as altruism, Like some kind of congressman?"
She covers her queerness with a sticker : Vote For Me, For Everything
Confirming that the political activism during Lover Era and mostly Miss Americana was in fact really to cover the fact that she was already one foot out of the closet when they had to backtrack.
With this. Take a look at the closing scene of Miss Americana. When The Archer is playing in the background.
It's a montage of Taylor talking to someone and Taylor on the release night of Lover.
Look at what Taylor says...
Tumblr media
Queerbaiting Backlash:
This might be the worse part in my opinion.
Since she was flagging so hard to come out.
Sadly, most people didn't get that that was exactly what she was trying to do.
And medias massively accused her of queerbaiting.
And using the queer community.
I'm still so mad and heartbroken about this....
Tumblr media
reusing an old Twitter post...
Even queer fans...:
Tumblr media
Frankly, speculating about her sexuality would have been way less damaging than this...
Songs about this event:
Taylor wrote a lot about this failed coming out.
The Archer, was her song about her anxiety about coming out. And begging her fans to stay.
I'm not gonna do a full lyrics analysis because this post is already a novel.
But read those lyrics with that in mind and you'll see how loud it is, and heartbreaking.
"I've got a hundred thrown out speeches I almost said to you"
Also. Worth noting that after Lover was released and she was not able to come out, she switched one lyric in that song.
Instead of "Combat, I'm ready for combat" singular (coming out was the combat she was ready to face)
She now sings every time "Combats, I'm ready for Combats", because coming out has turned into multiple battles that she has to face now...
Hoax:
Noticed how she says that all of her heroes die all alone in The Archer?
Her fear that if she comes out, all her fans would leave.
In Hoax she says: "You know the hero died so what's the point of keeping score movie for?"
Because with her Master Heist and everything, she was not able to be one of those heroes herself... The hero that she wanted to be died in that moment because she was unable to come out.
Edit: I messed up the lyrics. But it's even more telling. Because the movie she's talking about is Miss Americana, once she was unable to come out.
Evermore:
This song is litteraly her looking back at what happened and how she managed to process everything and ultimatly heal even though it felt at the start like she would never be able to.
"I've been down since July" - June 30th = failed coming out
"Motion capture, put me in a bad light" - Queerbaiting allegations. And Miss Americana being rebranded.
"Writting letters, adressed to the fire" - Her hundred thrown out speeches that she almost said.
"I rewind the tape, but all it does is pause, on the very moment all was lost" - June 30th...
"Sending signals, to be double crossed" - Her flagging strongly on her way to come out, only to be accused of queerbaiting.
Tumblr media
Right Where You Left Me:
The restaurant is a metaphor for the closet.
"Sitting in a corner I haunt, cross legged in the dim light"
Doesn't really feel like a restaurant, but her hiding in the closet.
"I swear, you could hear a hairpin drop. Right when I felt the moment stopped"
Droping hairpins is giving hints that you are gay.
She was doing this very loudly right before she was kept from coming out.
"Dust collected on my pinned up hair"
Her hair are still pinned up because she was not able to come out. And dust collected over time that she spent forced in the closet.
Anti-Hero:
AH is really The Archer 2.0, and talks about the same fear of coming out and being abandonned.
The fact that she decided to depict herself as the Anti-Hero is both really interesting and heartbreaking.
Because to her, the hero was the version of herself that was able to come out...
Listen to Change in the perspective of being able to come out and change the face of the industry:
"Tonight we'll stand, get off our knees
Fight for what we've worked for all these years
And the battle was long, it's the fight of our lives
But we'll stand up champions tonight"
They were the Champions.
Side note: she sang this song at the ACMA in 2010, two weeks before Chely Wright's coming out.
When we know that she has knowed and worked with Chely since about 2007.
Then Taylor wrote Long Live one month after Chely Wright's coming out.
Listen to the song with the same perspective as Change now.
"You held your head like a hero, on a history book page"
Chely Wright came out in May 2010. Taylor wrote Long Live in June 2010.
Look at the parallels of both songs.
And now, look at her choice to name that song Anti-Hero after everything that hapenned....
She also wrote Long Story Short and The Great War about that event, but this is for another post and it's about how this event affected her relationship with Karlie.
How she thought she was betrayed but ultimately found out it was not the case.
And how they both made it through.
Ok, I'm exhausted lol.
Sorry for writting a novel.
But this is such an important part of Taylor's history and I really wanted to do it justice (hope I was able to).
If you are still reading...Thank you for your question!
2K notes · View notes
etheries1015 · 6 months
Note
Can you do a twst wonderland x overworked reader? But instead of being normal and taking a break they keep pretending everything is fine despite the fact they are starting to flunk classes and forgetting lunch?
I don't really care who it is for I just need more twst wonderland stuff haha
I actually really really love this, since I've been working full time and going to college full time, overworking is NOT difficult to achieve. Remember that your grades do not determine your worth, and take care of yourself <3 thank you for this lovely request, Anon <3
Twst x Overworked!Reader
General warnings: Gender neutral, mentions of not eating and being exhausted.
featuring: Riddle, Silver, Vil, Malleus, Lilia
Intro:
Being the prefect of Ramshackle came with a plethora of responsibilities. You were practically the campus rag doll- carried around by everyone's will, solving problems, fixing issues, someone people would trust to go to in times of crisis. You were always there when a student over blot, and it was no hidden secret that you managed to do that while being at the top of the class despite being non-magic.
However, there was so much you could do, and so many smiles to hide behind. Everyone began to take notice, of the way you became snappy at others a little quicker than usual, dismissing issues with a wave of your hand and a stand-offish quick solution. It was in the way someone would ask if you were alright after noticing the dark circles under your eyes, only for you to give your signature kind smile and insist you were alright.
It was also obvious in the way that you were not found at lunch as you normally were, most students unable to find you not to realize that you were attempting to catch up on school work where you could. You could feel yourself begin to wither away, but the fear of being judged and losing the title of the smart, courageous prefect was slipping from your fingertips causing you to fall into a vicious cycle.
What do they do when they finally decide to confront you, seeing past the facade you were so clearly painting?
Riddle
It came as a complete surprise when you showed up to his dorm asking him to assist you in studying for classes. This was uncommon since he was certain you were doing incredibly well for yourself, taking note of your slowly increasingly disheveled look with every session you had set up. It wasn't until you yawned for the fifth time during a study session that he spoke up.
"Are you alright, (Y/N)? He asked, "You're distracted. You better pay attention if you wish to do better on this test, since-"
"Yes, since I practically failed the last one. Yes, I'm fine, please continue." Your interruption left Riddle surprised, raising an eyebrow and setting down his pencil.
"Are you sure you're-"
"I'm fine!" You snapped. Riddle was taken aback at this sudden outburst, a look of dread covering your features at the realization your voice had raised in a way you hadn't meant it to. You pursed your lips and looked down in shame, tears filling your eyes. You were quick to cover your face in embarrassment, shaking your head.
"I'm sorry," You mumbled a few times, each time becoming more broken as tears streamed between your fingers and you attempted to choke back sobs. You heard Riddle close his book and let out a small sigh, before standing up. You couldn't bring yourself to look at the red-haired male, for you were ashamed of yourself for lashing out in such a way when he had only meant to help.
"Come," He said. Confused, you peeked between your fingers seeing that Riddle had stood up and grabbed your hand.
"When I'm feeling overworked and sad..." He said shyly, "I secretly go to the kitchen and take a tart, or some other dessert." You raised your eyebrows, your tears slowing as you furrowed your eyebrows and tilted your head. "Do not repeat that to anyone else, though. Come, I'm feeling...overworked." Biting your lower lip, you nodded and took his hand, Riddle leading you out of his room and towards the dorm kitchen. Silence filled the hall for only a minute, interrupted by your curiosity. You knew how he felt about taking tarts that were meant for unbirthday parties, much less breaking the very rules and morals he strictly maintained.
"Do you really do that?" Without looking back, Riddle replied with a smile on his lips.
"I do in this moment."
Silver
Silver has always been a sweetheart to you, being attentive to your state he'd often bring you things such as teas on occasion, however, you realized he was doing it a lot more frequently than usual.
"Here," He said to you as you let him into Ramshackle and set down an armful of items on the table, "This tea my father says is good for aching muscles. Young master and I cooked some of these foods, they are good for replenishing your energy, especially after a long arduous day of training."
"I don't do any physical training though?" You pointed out to the silver-haired male, pulling out a chair and sitting in it, resting your head upon your hands as you glanced over the goodies he had brought you.
"Well, it works a lot for when you're really tired. I eat these myself frequently, and it makes you feel a little better when you're overworked." Your eyes widened at his statement, mouth opening slightly and looking up at the tall male who only graced you with a gentle yet sad smile.
"I'm not...overworked," Overwhelmed by his gaze that only held affection, you averted your eyes and began picking at your fingers. Silver placed a hand upon yours, before pressing his forehead against your own. Your face flushed red, yet you couldn't find the energy to pull away.
"You're warm, I think you're getting sick..." You tried not to correct him in the fact you were warm in his close proximity, allowing him to do whatever he felt was needed. Silver grabbed one of the teas that lay against the table, eyeing it and looking back at you.
"This will be good for you...I'll make some. You should go get some rest, and I'll help you sort out an appropriate schedule for you."
"Silver, I-" You wanted to decline his offer, yet was interrupted by the shaking of his head and a chaste hug.
"You do so much for all of us around the campus, your bravery shows no bounds. But even the strongest of heroes need to know when they've taken on too much." Sighing in defeat, you gave in and nodded. Silver smiled in satisfaction and made his way towards the kitchen to prepare you the tea he so kindly brought for you, as your eyelids felt heavy and the weight of burden slowly eased from your shoulders.
You were going to have a wonderful night's rest for the first time in a very, very long time.
Vil
You weren't particularly in the mood for this, Vil inspecting every part of you at this moment simply by attempting to convince him you were fine.
"your skin is pale showing signs of fatigue, your muscles are untoned-"
"They're always like that."
"I am not finished," Vil folded his arms, " The skin around your nails are torn up, and you have bags under your eyes that only get that dark and puffy after a significant amount of sleep deprivation and lack of hydration. You went from the top of the exam board and plummeted to the middle," He strutted towards you, looking into your eyes with sadness.
"And worst of all, you are nowhere to be found during lunch the past two weeks, and you seem to be losing weight and have less energy."
"Thank you," you rolled your eyes, "For pointing out everything wrong with me, as if I didn't already know. I'll be fine, thank you for your concern." You went to turn away from Vil, before his strong hands turned you back around and held you into a hug, stroking your hair. You were taken aback by this sudden form of affection, your arms laying flat at your sides.
"I'm fine," You repeated, mumbling into his chest where he held you firmly.
"I'm very good at spotting when someone is lying," Vil said plainly, "I can tell when someone is putting on an act. And it isn't to point out your flaws, (Y/N)," You paused at hearing your name escape his lips rather than your typical "potato" nickname he oh-so loved to attach to you.
"It's because I am worried for your health. Stop putting on an act." You felt your determination to hide your feelings crumble and tears form in your eyes, your arms trembling as you moved to give him a hesitant hug back.
"I know how hard it must be," He said with calmness and understanding in his voice, "to feel pressured to be okay. But around me, you do not need to pretend. Let me help you, as you have helped...us." He pulled away to see your tear-stained cheeks, tucking a hair behind your ear,
"As you have helped me. You do not need to struggle alone."
Malleus
"Child of man," Malleus called out to you, "Are you alright?" It was your typical meetup outside Ramshackle dorm, You sat down lazily at the garden table the two of you worked hard on, your head lay down on the table.
"I'm fine, Mal," You sighed, not looking up to see his gaze. You suddenly felt something soft wrap around your shoulders, recognizing it as His blazer. This caused you to finally raise your head, a gentle smile upon the lips of the tall black-haired fae.
"It's cold out, wouldn't you agree?" He took a seat next to you, "The flowers may wilt soon." You nodded, propping your head up with your hand.
"Sad, isn't it?" You grumbled, "they were so vibrant and colorful, and soon their leafs will wilt and turn brown. They will become weak and fall apart." Malleus eyed you curiously, noticing even in the dark the way your eyes were swollen and the frown that painted your features. Something that wasn't common to see, for you were typically so energetic to be engaging in conversation with him. He turned his gaze back to the flowers, leaning back in the chair and folding his arms.
"Yes...but when this harsh winter snow passes," He said, using green magic to grasp one of the blooms to twirl between two fingers, "Spring will come, and their vibrance will become apparent." You shifted your gaze over to him, tilting your head as his eyes lovingly inspected the flower.
"With seasons changing, so do these plants upon their own time. They will become weak and wither during the harshness of the seasons, yes, However...with the proper support..." the flower was suddenly wrapped in magical clouds, and when they dispersed the flower had grown in size and become a rose with large and healthy properties, a bright green stem and the reddest glow shining beneath the moonlight. Malleus looked back over to you with a smile, quickly de-thorning the rose and placing it behind your ear. Your eyes smiled for the first time in a while, letting out a breathy chuckle and a shake of your head. He really knew how to make his points come across without being direct, his poetic tongue becoming soothing for your tired heart.
"Thank you, Malleus."
Lilia
The ex-general fae was not unfamiliar with the signs of exhaustion and fatigue, and you were showing clear signs of such.
"Skipping lunch again, little bat?" A familiar voice called out to you, causing you to yelp in surprise, dropping your pen. How he managed to sneak inside of ramshackle dorm, much less your room, was far beyond you.
"Lilia! gosh.." You shook your head and picked your pen back up after glaring at him for startling you, shaking your head and continuing your studying endeavors.
"Playing catch up, I see? Take a break," The red eyed fae said, "I made you something~"
"No thank you, i'm fine," You quickly replied, almost panicking. Lilia pouted and pulled out a lunch box that was large and smelled...actually pretty good.
"It has many nutrients that are good for replenishing your health," He said proudly, "Seeing as you have been skipping meals, losing sleep, and your grades have been dropping presumably from your lack of self-care," He said bluntly. Your eyes widened as you looked at the fae with surprisingly good observation skills, curious how he was able to discern that information. You opened your mouth to reply that you were doing alright and that you just needed some time to catch up, however, his reflexes were far too fast for you. He pushed a spoonful of whatever food he had in his grasp, watching you with delight at your shock.
You almost choked at the suddenness, however the pleasant taste of whatever soup he had given you caused you to become almost entirely distracted.
"This...is actually really good. You didn't make it, did you?" Lilia huffed and closed his eyes with his signature look of disappointment, yet a smile not wavering from his lips.
"You wound me, but the others had convinced me the best way to help you would be by good-old chicken/veggie noodle soup!" he held out the rest of the bowl to you, pulling a seat next to you and clearing off your desk organized. You stopped protesting, for with this fae there was no getting around whatever he was doing.
"Now, take a break and allow your body some rest. You cannot learn nor function properly under these conditions. I understand how much it may mean to be accomplished, however, those accomplishments will mean nothing if you die from exhaustion," his smile never faded, yet you could tell his words were meant in seriousness as he chastised you. It was full of love and affection, though. He had the best of intentions, his ruby eyes
"Holding your issues inside is no good either, dearest. Now, confide in this old fae, perhaps I can be of assistance to your woes. And I hope this will be the last time I hear of your negligence to your health through your classmates, and next time you seek out help."
872 notes · View notes
nicksolemnlyswears · 1 year
Note
DUDDDDE!!
I am in LOVE with your writing. I have been craving some good Han Lue works and you're filling the hole!
Everywhere is extremely lacking in quality Han Lue content bro 😭😭
But any whosies.
I was wondering if it were at all possible to request a Han work from you (from what I've seen you still have requests open so if you don't im sorry)
Specifically something about a reader who's fucking amazing at driving, and has been crushing on Han for a while, and the two decode to race (set in Tokyo) and whoever wins gets the loser to do what they want. Y'know classic setup.
You could choose where this leads to. Idc if we win or loose. All I want is a little bit of fluff sprinkled amongst some smut mayhaps. You could do this in headcannon format btw don't feel obligated to write the whole thing.
I'm just thirsting for any thing I can take 💀🙏🏼
Take your time! <3
Tumblr media Tumblr media
pairing: han lue x racer!reader
words: 11.4k
warnings: some cursing and smut (pls wrap it before you tap it) don't judge my smut too much, it's been a while since i've written one
notes: hi anon! thank you for all your sweet, sweet words 🥺 i hope this is somewhere along the lines of what you were thinking of. as soon as i saw your request i was ✨inspired✨ it's been a long time since i've been so hooked by a oneshot. i have worked on it almost everyday since i received it so thank you! i changed the request just a little bit, i hope you don't mind.
trust me i know there is a ridiculous lack in han content! it's the reason i'm here writing over this man! there is not enough content for the speed i consume it, lol. i've read my own headcanons like 10 times already, excluding the times i was working on it.
anyways! might have gotten a little carried away but i enjoyed writing it so much! here you go! enjoy!
i really really hope you like it!!
Tumblr media
Tokyo was the city where you learned how to street race. Weaving through the cars on the highway became second nature the harder you pressed the gas pedal. The neon lights turned into blurs as you sped down traffic, whether it was in search of a prize or a thrill.
You were meant to meet Han Lue. His presence became known as soon as he stepped foot in the parking complexes that serve as makeshift race tracks. He quickly became popular with the crowd, especially when he joined DK's crew.
His races were seen as exclusive, known to happen once in a blue moon. He was totally opposite to you. You took the opportunity to race any moment you could. It's what lead you to become a good racer. Practice makes perfect, after all.
'Good racer' is a bit of an understatement. You're one of the best right after DK. There's a debate about whether the second best is you or Han. Each person can take their pick. Many have suggested the idea for the both of you to race, but Han has shot down each and every one. He doesn't need to prove himself to anyone. Besides, he hasn't had anything to gain from racing you.
People like to call you 'Angel' because when you started participating in the races, you looked like an absolute angel, but soon after, they discovered you raced like the devil. You fool everyone around you, even with the way you drive. Whenever someone has to go against you, they think they have your strategy down, yet you switch it up every time.
Tumblr media
The distinctive revving of your car alerts Han of your presence. He glances to his left, where you've parked right beside him. As you open the door and step out of your car, he opens a bag of chips, depositing one into his mouth.
You walk over to him, leaning against his car like he is. The bare skin of your back arching slightly as it touches the cool metal. "Have I missed anything?"
Han shakes his head cooly, watching his surroundings. He spares you a glance, taking in what you're wearing. A short, shimmery dress with an open back and high heels. Seems like you don't plan on racing tonight. You refuse to race in high heels. You've tried before and failed. You didn't lose, but you did break off both heels.
You feel his eyes trailing over your body, and you don't mind it. You like that you can catch his attention that way. Having a crush on a guy like Han takes work. He has every woman's attention in the racing underground. They often cling to his arms and bat their eyelashes his way, and he has gladly taken a few of them home.
"You done judging my outfit?" You say, looking at him.
"Not judging, admiring," he promptly replies with a small shrug.
That right there is what feeds into your silly little crush. Han isn't afraid of your comments or banter. If you look good, he'll say it. It's the way he says it that irks you, though. He is so nonchalant and aloof like he's commenting on the weather.
It doesn't help that he's never truly made a move on you. He considers you his friend and acts that way (most of the time, at least). You hate every moment because being his friend is the last thing you want.
"I take it you're not gonna race tonight?" He asks, already knowing the answer. He just needed an excuse to talk to you. Digging into his bag of chips, he grabbed another one to pop into his mouth.
"Not unless it's against you," you respond cheekily.
Han chuckles, "Not you too."
"Are you afraid of losing, Han?" You ask him, keeping your eyes on the race about to start. Why else would he avoid racing you?
Han props one arm on the roof of his car, facing you and saying, "If you're into racing, you can't be afraid to lose, Angel."
"Then why don't you spoil me a little and race me?" You hum, turning your head to face him. He's much closer than you anticipated, but you resist the urge to pull back despite the reddening of your cheeks. You want Han to know you like him even if you refuse to say it out loud.
"Maybe one day when I have something to race for," he responds simply, kissing your cheek and turning back to watch the race.
You release a shaky sigh and try to calm your pounding heart. Extending a hand, you dip your fingers into Han's nearly empty bag of chips and steal one for yourself. Han doesn't mind lowering the bag to make it easier for you. There's a smirk on his face as he fully well knows what he did. It's fun to make you flustered.
Tumblr media
Han is out on the streets of Tokyo doing business or collecting his money from the greedy hands of wanna be gangsters. It's entertaining, to say the least, although sometimes it gets tedious. It's only fun when they get rowdy and want to intimidate him. They should know better than to judge Han by his calm exterior.
He's walking by the busy streets of Shibuya, the shopping district of Tokyo, minding his business. Han avoids the masses of people until he looks into a store and sees you. You're by the checkout desk, ringing out a client.
Han can't help it; he's drawn to you. Forgetting the wad money he has to collect, he enters the store. The bell on top of it chimes, prompting you to greet the customer in an abnormally cheery tone.
"Hello, welcome to-Han?" You stutter over the greeting, seeing his slightly mocking grin.
Han walks over to you and leans on the counter, there was barely anyone in the store now. Perfect timing. He assesses you and your overly pink clothes, bedazzled name tag, and glossy pink lips. It's unlike you to be so pink. He recalls you telling him you hate the wretched color.
"So this is where you work, Angel," he hums, toying with the trinkets on the checkout counter.
"Not everyone can survive with racing and sketchy side deals," You mutter. One hand on your tilted hip as you shoot him an annoyed look.
If racing made you enough money, you certainly would not be working in a store that makes you wear pink on every single shift. You could get more involved in the sketchy part of racing, but things are alright for now.
"True," Han stifles a laugh. He grabs a lollipop from the big jar filled with sweets for the paying customers and pops it into his mouth.
You extend a hand to throw away the colorful wrapping, and he places it gently on your hand, fingertips grazing your palm. You're not a teenager to be reacting over such minuscule actions, yet you do.
"What are you doing here, Han?" Han adores it when you say his name that way, pretending to be annoyed by his presence when in reality, you love having him around.
"Wanted to visit my favorite girl," he responds aloofly, carefully gauging your reaction. As he expected, your cheeks redden, and you try to hide it.
"Did you know lying makes your nose grow long," you scoff, rolling your eyes.
"Could be useful," Han says cheekily, causing your blush to deepen.
"If you're not going to buy anything, you can't be here," you shoot with a pout.
You weren't prepared to face Han this afternoon. You didn't get to repeat your affirmation as you do every night you encounter him. His constant playfulness throws you off, not giving you the opportunity to compose yourself.
"Oh no, consumerism got its claws on you," he jokes sarcastically. You glare at him and cross your arms over your chest, which only emphasizes the size of your chest. "Fine, help me find a new jacket?"
You round the counter and motion for Han to follow you toward the men's section. Your coworker will have no problem taking over the checkout counter.
You shoot Han question after question in search of the perfect jacket for him: colors, textures, durability, versatility, sizing, and so on. He responds just as quickly, propping an arm up and leaning against a rack of clothes as he watches you storm all over the store in search of the item that screams Han. He had no intentions of buying anything today but seeing how invested you got it leaves him no choice.
"I quite like this one," you beam, standing Han in front of a full-length mirror. You slide off the jacket he's wearing and replace it with the nice black leather jacket you found for him. Dusting him off, you look into the mirror seeing how perfectly it fits his broad shoulders.
"Why do I feel like you're giving me the most expensive one?" Han asks, looking at himself in the mirror.
He had to admit you picked well. He looks great in the black leather jacket. It didn't have too many buckles to make him uncomfortable, and it wasn't too warm either. The material felt nice and luxurious hence his comment.
"You asked for my help," you shrug, "It's not my fault I have expensive taste. Besides, you look hot in it." You wink at Han through the mirror.
Han tries to hide the smile forming on his lips. You were getting bolder and bolder. He knows about your crush on him; you're terrible at hiding it. Truthfully, he's felt the same from the moment he saw you race. You're oblivious, though, so he likes to tease you.
"I'll take it," Han sighs, refusing to look at the price tag. "Might even wear it on a date."
"Oh, you've got a date?" Your smile falters, quickly regretting picking such a nice outfit that makes him look so handsome. You'd definitely put out if a man wore that to a date and was as lovely as Han. All of your hard work just for another girl to enjoy it. If you catch one of Han's little friends wrapped around the jacket...you will burn it.
"Not yet," he says mysteriously, taking off the jacket and returning to the checkout counter. Han has to get going. He does have to collect his money. Especially now that you've convinced him to buy the expensive leather jacket. 'It's an investment,' he tells himself.
"She'll be one lucky girl," you huff, scanning the tag, carefully folding it, and placing it on a bag. "Don't worry, I'll apply the friends and family discount."
You watch Han go through the display window and hope he was just fucking with you on the whole date thing. You can live with your crush and have him as just a friend, but if he gets a girlfriend, you will not be able to manage it. You scold yourself silently for acting like a lovesick teenager. You're better than that. Right?
Tumblr media
Taking the party to Han's club after a race is a must, especially after winning six thousand dollars. You won't have to worry about rent for at least six months, which is something to celebrate.
You park next to Han's car, and he waits for you to enter the plain-looking building. People greet him left and right as they go through the door that pours music and lights each time it's opened.
"You sure are popular," you tease him, leisurely walking towards him.
"Comes with the territory," Han responds without missing a beat. "Ready?" He asks, motioning for you to walk ahead of him.
"Always," you chirp. You purposefully accentuate the sway of your hips, giving Han something to look at.
Being a Friday night, the inside is filled to the brim, there isn't any space for more drunken people. Using your short height to your advantage, you easily find a way to the connecting hallway between this part of the club and the more exclusive one.
Han isn't as lucky constantly losing you from his sight. He's conscious that you are a grown woman capable of making your own decisions and caring for yourself, but he'd feel better being with you.
When he catches up to you at a point, he grabs your hips, pressing you against him, preventing you from getting lost again. You look back, startled, expecting to see a stranger rubbing against you. Noticing this, Han quickly calms you, "It's just me, Angel."
'It's just Han,' you repeat to yourself. You grab onto one of his hands, holding onto your hip, taking full advantage of the situation. Having Han wrapped around you feels like being on cloud nine. If this wasn't his club, you'd be going in circles, so he never pulls away.
With Han holding onto you, the way to the 'not-so-secret' hallway takes longer than usual. Not that you're complaining, though! Han's firm grip makes you fall harder for him. It fuels your imagination on how it would feel in other situations.
Han enjoys this position just as much as you do. He can pretend it's a safety thing as he steers you away from the sweaty bodies of drunks dancing, but it's for his selfish gain.
Having your body close to him reminds him of what he's missing and desperately desires. It started as a little innocent game for Han, knowing you had a crush on him, but then it turned into something more. He likes that you have feelings for him and wants it to stay that way. Han wants your attention on him all the time. His games are over; he wants you.
To your surprise, Han doesn't let go of your waist when you enter the hallway. Instead, he slings one arm around it as he walks beside you. "Maybe we should've taken the other entrance," he smirks.
"And miss the show?" You chuckle, finding a couple making out in the deserted hallway. Neither is willing to admit it's not about the show but about Han's proximity.
Unlike all the other times in the past you've partied with Han, he doesn't let go of you for more than two minutes. You dance all night together, just the two of you, no girls coming up to Han and no guys coming up to you. There simply wasn't a window of opportunity.
"You enjoying yourself?" He says in your ear over the loud music. Your back is against his front as your sway and roll your body to the beat. One of his hands is nursing a drink, and the other is right where it should be, on you.
"I won 6k and have a cute guy buying me drinks and dancing with me. What do you think?" You giggle, turning in his arms to face him instead. The drinks stop you from overthinking and let you wrap your arms around his neck. Faces close. You want to kiss him so bad you're not drunk enough, though, and it's not the way you'd like to do it, either.
"Just making sure," he smiles down at you, hand on your lower back.
The night is long, yet with Han, it goes by so fast. Sooner than you'd prefer, he walks you to your car, no longer holding onto your waist but your hand. There are only a few stragglers left behind who refuse to acknowledge the night is over. You and Han are two of them.
Reaching your white and red, modified skyline Han opens the door for you. With one arm propped against the open door and the other extended onto the roof, Han cages you against your car. Before you get in, you turn to face him, finding the bravery to do something you've been thinking about all night.
"Thanks for tonight, Han. I had fun," you say softly, suddenly feeling shy.
"Anytime, Angel," he responds smoothly, brushing his fingers on your naked shoulder. The jacket you wore earlier was discarded somewhere in the bar. An excuse for Han to see you outside the races.
"Well, goodnight." Gathering every particle of bravery, you stand on your toes and peck his lips softly.
It's only a tiny, innocent kiss, yet it makes Han close his eyes. It happens too quickly for his liking. You have been growing bolder, bold enough to kiss him. He needs to step up his game.
Taking advantage of his distracted state, you close your car door and rev the engine. On the drive to your apartment, you squeal in excitement. Fingers ghost over your lips, replaying the small kiss over and over again.
Tumblr media
Another chance at a race becomes available only days after your win. Men love to challenge women, especially those who are winning, much like you are.
They hate seeing you be successful, but it doesn't bother you in the least. It's another opportunity to win cash or a car, which you can use for parts and sell what you don't need.
As you roll up to the starting line, Han approaches your window, leaning down to duck his head in.
"Come to give me a good luck kiss?" You speak playfully, lips turned up into a smile.
You two haven't talked about what happened at the club and have continued to act as you usually do. He's been more touchy with you, though, often trying to find a way to be close to you. Being the lovestruck fool you are, you've encouraged it, finding those ways to let him be close.
"We both know you don't need luck. You've got this in the bag, Angel." Han speaks encouragingly, "Tell you what, though. You win, and it's yours."
"Making me earn it, I see," you laugh, shaking your head. "Alright, you've got a deal. See you on the other side."
Han is confident you'll win. With a last reassuring tap on your door, he steps back, finding his place in the crowd.
Your opponent finally drives up to the starting line, sending you an unnecessary nasty look you laugh at. The flag girl stands between the two cars, her dress leaving nothing to the imagination. You respect it. They are a lot more confident than you are in that department.
You are off when the word 'go' falls from her lips. You knew this track by heart, having raced it so many times. You knew exactly when to hit the gas and when to press the brake to get the car to swerve. Han's full attention is on your race, and when your car disappears to another level, he takes the elevator up to the top floor, where the finish line is. Watching you race is interesting. You always come up with ways to confuse your opponents.
With a bag of chips, he anxiously waits for your victory. Regardless of your ability to race and win, your races make him nervous. He cares about you, and so many things can go wrong.
The noisy crowd gets louder as the sound of tires screeching gets closer. In seconds, your car swerves onto the top floor, again marking you as the victor. There's not a scratch or bump in your car. Your opponent arrives shortly after with dents and long scratches in his paint.
The crowd cheers loudly for you, coming up to you to congratulate you and tell you how cool you looked. Your opponent comes up to you and hands you his keys with a scowl. You shrug it off. A deal is a deal.
Winning leaves you on a high, a feeling of invincibility wrapping around you. You've learned to control it because that feeling caused a big loss years ago. You get distracted by the people around you and forget Han's promise. It's funny because it was the only thing running through your head while you raced.
"Good job out there," Han says, catching up to you later in the night once the hype died down.
"Why, thank you!" You chirp, closing the hood of your car and leaning back to sit on it.
"I believe I made a promise," Han mentions, stepping close to you until you're face to face, only a few inches between the two of you. "You did," you nod, biting your lip.
Han notices this, bringing a hand up to cup your face, his thumb tugging your lip loose from the tight hold of your teeth. The other wraps around your waist, pulling you close. You slide on the warm metal of your car, placing a hand on his chest to brace yourself as Han settles between your legs.
"I'm a man of my word," he whispers, finally leaning down to press his eager lips against yours. Han is greedy for many things, and your lips are one of them. Ever since that night at the club, he's wanted to smash his lips against yours, to feel you close, taste you.
Your eyes instantly flutter close, fisting Han's shirt in your hand as if afraid he'll pull away too quickly. The kiss starts slowly as you both test the waters, but it soon becomes not enough. Han tilts his head, deepening the kiss.
It's an electric shock that consumes him and doesn't let him go. This is the result of Han holding himself back, and you made it worse when you gave him a taste the other night.
Han slips a hand under your shirt, feeling the warmth of your skin. You gasp against his lips, arching your back as his cold fingers catch you by surprise. It serves as an opportunity for Han, his tongue pushing past your pouty lips, savoring the moment.
You gave into him, offering everything you have in exchange for this moment. His warmth wraps around you, burning you from the inside out. The need to breathe makes itself present too soon and becomes far more demanding than the need for each other's lips.
Han pulls away, your bottom lip between his teeth. You're breathless, as if you ran a marathon. You feel lightheaded, intoxicated by Han, who continues to peck your lips softly. He might be addicted already. The tips of his fingers draw soothing circles on your lower back, grounding you in the moment.
"So this is what winning feels like," you breathe out, smoothing Han's shirt with your palms. A futile way to hide their shakiness.
Han laughs, pressing his face against your neck and leaving a fleeting kiss behind. "Appears so, Angel."
Tumblr media
A perk of being Han's friend is using his garage whenever you want. The days of paying for a spot to fix your car in a stranger's garage are far in the past. At the moment, you've spent the most part of the afternoon upgrading your car. The car you won on your last race sits beside yours with the hood popped open as you switched around pieces. He had quality parts, and his driving still sucked.
Twinkie, Earl, and the others are scattered around the large garage, working on different things and chattering. You had purposefully picked a spot away from them so you wouldn't get distracted. With work, your time is limited.
Han is on the second floor, leaning against the railing and pretending to watch the first floor and what they are doing. In reality, he is watching you closely.
You're bent over the hood of the car, working on unscrewing a tight bolt, cursing at the man who installed it initially. It's a sight straight out of his dreams. Your Nike sweatpants hung low on your hips, framing your ass perfectly. If he focused, he'd see the dimples on your lower back. His mind ran wild at the thought of pressing his thumbs against them while taking you from behind.
It's been a while since he's slept around. He cut himself off when he realized his feelings for you. What was the point of sleeping around if he wouldn't be satisfied? Those girls weren't you. They were temporary relief. Now, his pants tighten at anything you do. It's like he's seventeen again and unable to keep it in his pants.
He followed the curve of your ass to your arched back and the cropped shirt you wore. The matching crew neck sweater you arrived in is discarded in your car due to the heat. The revealing shirt rose with each of your movements, revealing the band of your baby blue bra. You tug on it for the millionth time today, annoyed.
The strands of hair you curled to frame your face stick uncomfortably to your sweaty forehead. You regret not putting them back into the two braids that fell over your shoulders.
Han needed to rip his eyes away from you before the others noticed. He's been staring for too long, fantasizing about everything he could do to you. To Han, you looked even more beautiful than you did that night with your sparkly dress and makeup. A woman who knows her way around a car is instantly a hundred times more attractive in his eyes.
As he accidentally visualizes you taking his cock from that same exact position, car included, you groan and straighten up. "I need help," you whine to no one in particular. The bolt is not budging, no matter how hard you try.
Han snaps out of his fantasy and springs into action, quickly appearing by your side. You've bent over again, wrench in hand, to give it one more try before giving up. He leans beside you, a hand on your lower back for faux support.
"What's the matter, Angel?" He says softly, one hand propping him up as he looks at the machinery under the hood. It's better if he helps you. He can't continue listening to your whines and groans.
"I need to unscrew those," you point at the bolts giving you a hard time.
Han asks for the wrench in your hands, and you place it in his hand, annoyed. You don't need the help of a man to do this, but it's Han, so you'll take it. You watch him as he places the wrench around the bolt, his arm tenses, emphasizing his muscles hidden by the short-sleeved button-up he wore over a white wife-beater tank.
His hair fell around his eyes as he successfully unscrewed the bolts. Feminism died as you lustfully took in Han, biting your lip. 'What a man,' you thought. You would've instantly refused the help if he had been any other guy.
"There you go," Han says, handing you the wrench. When he spares you a glance, he laughs softly. Good to know he has the same effect you have on him.
"Whatever would I do without you," you purr, shooting him a mischievous smile, "You deserve a reward." That's what it has come to, silly excuses to kiss Han because you're just friends. Nothing more.
Han looks at your lips briefly before snapping back to your eyes. You grin at him, leaning closer to kiss him for his 'hard work.' You know that he's been watching you all this time; you saw it from the reflective surface of the toolbox. Seeing his quickness to help you makes you believe he enjoyed the show.
Your lips brush teasingly against his, and just before Han can grab the back of your neck to stop the teasing, a loud bang tears through the room. Both you and Han pull away to see where the sound comes from, but Han bangs his head on the car's hood in the process.
"What the hell was that?" Han yells, rubbing the back of his head. He's annoyed that he's been interrupted.
"Sorry! The motor I was working on fell!" Earl exclaims from the other side of the garage, unaware of the daggers Han is throwing him.
"Best I get back to work," you quietly say with a chuckle, taking the piece you needed out of the car to bring it to yours.
"Yeah," Han says simply, reluctantly leaving to do his own thing.
Each and everyone that's in Han's garage returns to their business after the noisy interruption. Twinkie turns on a radio, blasting music to drown out the silence and clanking of tools. You work without interruption for the next three hours, giving your car all the love it deserves.
You clean your hands free of the motor oil and grease and search for Han. Your work for today was done. Now that you took anything valuable from the car you won, you had to sell it. You figured Han could do that for you.
"Hey, are you busy?" You ask him, seeing him working on a part by his desk.
"Nah, what's up, Angel?" He questions, dropping the screwdriver in his hand to focus all his attention on you.
Leaning on the desk casually, you begin speaking, "After I replace the bumper and give it a new paint job, can you sell that car for me?"
"Shouldn't be a problem," glancing at the car, Han agrees. It's a popular car in the racing world, and as soon as he gets the word out he's selling it, many offers will pop up.
"You're the best, Han!" You beam at him, pushing yourself off the desk to return downstairs.
"Angel, wait," he calls after you. Being your friend has been fun, yet he needs more. You shouldn't have to come up with excuses to kiss him; you should be able to do it freely whenever you want.
"Yes, Han," you ask softly, tilting your head in question.
Standing up from the rolling chair, he approaches you, "Do you want to go on a date?"
A grin sneaks past your lips before you even process what he said. Instantly, you nod your head, "I'd love to." You could combust at that moment. Finally, after months of pining, Han asked you out.
"Let's go," he smiles, grabbing your hand and guiding you to his car.
"Wait, now?" You furrow your eyebrows.
"Yes, unless you have something more important," he asks, teasing you.
"Nothing is more important, but I'm a mess," you shake your head hesitantly. You spent your afternoon working on cars, sweating, and getting covered in grease. You didn't think it would be in sweatpants when you pictured going on a date. Not to mention the state of your hair.
"No, you're not. If you must know, you've had me distracted all day," Han whispers the last part in your ear, trying to convince you even if it means giving himself away.
"Am I supposed to apologize?" You question, the corner of your lip curving into a sultry smile. You had been right all along.
"No, just agree to the date. Be spontaneous," Han bounces his eyebrows cutely.
"Let's do it," you sigh, hoping you won't regret it.
"Atta girl," Han smiles victoriously.
Han tries to remember the last time he had a proper date. Even with his ex, they just sort of happened. No date ever officially branded as such. It's why rather than asking you and waiting for the day to arrive, he decided to do it spontaneously. It leaves him no time to be nervous or to overthink things.
You slide your sweatshirt back on on the way out to shield yourself from the chilly Japanese night. Han opens the door to his car for you, shutting the door when you slip in. The drive is short as he takes you to a small family-owned sushi place he swears by.
"I'm surprised you eat more than chips and crackers," you joke with him as the food arrives, and he takes a bite.
"I definitely eat more than that," Han replies nonchalantly, referring to something else entirely. It's something you don't catch despite your dirty mind.
A discussion develops when you discover Han always orders the same thing in the restaurant. He's in Japan. He needs to throw himself into the culture and try new things.
Starting easy, you grab a piece of sushi from your plate, "You need to try this."
"I don't know," Han grimaces as he looks at the sushi held in your chopsticks.
"That's not an answer. Open your mouth," you groan, gently placing the sushi roll in his mouth.
You watch him chew slowly, getting a feel for the new food. "It's good," he agrees, liking whatever you had ordered. It was delicious, actually.
"Better than yours, right?" You ask him, knowingly, pointing your chopsticks at him.
"Yes," he rolls his eyes, refusing to give you the satisfaction.
"Told you," you sing, grabbing both plates and placing them in the middle of the table. Now you could each grab from both and share your meals.
The date goes smoothly. It's a wonder why the two of you hadn't gone to dinner before today. You already know Han is attentive and funny but his wisdom surprises you. He's already lived through so much, more than an average person. Despite being a couple years older than you, he retains his youth. That may be why he appeals to a younger crowd as well.
"What was your life like growing up?" You ask him, taking a drink from your Coke. Han ordered another plate of sushi to share, the one you chose earlier.
"My upbringing wasn't the best," he shrugs, remembering his life in California as a teen. "I was always in trouble."
"Why does something tell me that you were the one causing the trouble," you say, narrowing your eyes.
"I definitely was," he chuckles, "But in the end, it brought me here, and I'm happy."
Han believes in the timing of life. He's been after Tokyo for so long. Before stepping foot in Tokyo, he had to go through the Dominican Republic, Rio, Germany, Shanghai, London, and many more places. It was supposed to happen that way, or he wouldn't have met you.
"I knew it," you sigh dramatically, "I've always been into bad boys."
"What about you, Angel?" He returns the question, curious about your past.
"I grew up in a normal Japanese family. My dad's a mechanic, my mom a nurse, and my sister a pain in the ass. I went to school for engineering and graduated with top honors," you tell him, reminiscing on your not-as-impressive past.
"You say that as if it's easy to graduate with top honors," Han chides you, to which you roll your eyes. "Why work retail? Doesn't engineering make you a lot more money?"
"Don't laugh, okay?" You point at Han. When he agrees not to laugh, you continue, "I wanted to be a Formula 1 racer when I was younger. My dad signed me up to participate in smaller competitions, and I was pretty damn good. My mom was totally against it and forced my dad and me to quit.
Fast forward, I'm in college, and engineering seemed like the way to go. Learned about street racing and figured that could be a way back into my dream. It's a foolish thought. The professionals spend years in proper circuits practicing and competing. No one comes with a background of illegal racing."
Han wasn't expecting that answer. He assumed you hated engineering and did it to appease your parents. He wonders why you thought he would laugh. Your dream is nothing to laugh at. Having witnessed your racing, you undoubtedly had the innate talent. "So retail?" He prompts, realizing you didn't answer the first question.
Snapping your fingers, you say, "Right! I figured I'd always have my degree. I'd rather spend my time having fun now; when the time comes, I'll return to that. I do like it, but I'm not ready to commit to a life of 9 to 5's. I prefer spending my time in the wee hours of the night racing. Since I can't be a Formula 1 racer, I'll be a street racer. Much cooler, anyways."
"That takes guts," Han tells you, "I'm glad you're doing it."
You give him a little shrug and a smile because you were too. Despite your childish dream dying when your mom forced you to quit, you're still happy with your life. Especially if you end up with a guy like Han.
Han, being a gentleman, pays for dinner. Before returning to the car, you stop by a convenience store for dessert. Han follows you buying snacks for himself. In search of something sweet, you find a shelf filled with Pocky. You grab the chocolate-covered ones with a plan in mind.
You and Han sit at a table outside the convenience store. It was getting late, so only a few people were around. You open the packet of Pocky, taking out a chocolate-covered stick.
"Have you ever played the Pocky game?" You ask, taking a bite of the treat.
"No. What is it?" Han looks at you curiously.
"Essentially, you grab one end of the Pocky stick, and I grab the other. We have to eat it, but if one of us pulls away, they lose," you respond simply, hiding the game's purpose.
"That sounds awfully like Lady and the Tramp," Han mentions, catching onto your intentions.
Offering him a stick, you say, "Want to play?"
Han smiles at you and grabs the Pocky stick placing the biscuit end between his teeth. You hold the chocolate-covered end and tap his hand to start. You both take it slow, Han opting to stay still as you near his lips. You tilt your head when you're close to his lips, giving him the perfect opportunity to kiss you when only a small piece is left.
You smile into the chocolate-flavored kiss. If you wanted to kiss Han, you could've done it without so many sneaky plans or excuses, but it wouldn't be as fun.
"So, who won?" Han asks when you pull away.
"Does it matter?" You cheekily say, pulling him back in for another kiss.
There's no flaw in your reasoning. Han pulls you close, lifting your legs to lie in his lap. You spend more time than you care to admit making out outside the convenience store.
Han offers to drive you to your apartment since your car needs to be finished. Throughout the drive, his hand is laced with yours in your lap. Small talk flows between you as you continue to learn about each other.
Smoke coming from your apartment building cuts that conversation short. Firefighters stand outside the building, spraying water into the source of the fire. Han steps out of the car with you to ask anyone what is going on.
Noticing the building manager across the street, you approach him. He quickly blurts out all the information he knows. You're one of many of the tenants to approach him. "There's a fire on the sixth floor. We don't know the damage yet. I understand this is your residence, but you need somewhere else to say for the next few days while we asses the damage and inspect the building."
"What am I going to do?" You groan, covering your face with your hands. You worry about where you'll stay and your stuff in your apartment. You have important documents in there.
"You can stay with me," Han offers without a hint of hesitation.
"Are you sure? I don't want to impose." It's nice of Han to offer you a place to stay, but would it be too much at this stage of their situationship. Last thing you want is to push boundaries.
"You're not imposing. Let me help you," Han insists, grabbing your hand to rub soothing circles in it. It's a given he has feelings for you, but before that, you are his friend, and he's not going to leave you out on the streets or sleeping in your car.
Han offers you calming words on the way to his apartment. Your apartment is on the twelfth floor and the other side of the fire. Chances are that your stuff will probably be fine. Whether the building will close for renovations is another matter entirely.
His apartment is just another level to the building he owns. Its entrance is on a more private side. Inside, it's very clean and organized, a surprise since you expect most guys to be messy. Picture frames and knick knacks are scattered throughout the space, giving you more of a glimpse into Han's life.
It's quiet between the two of you but comfortable. Han is giving you time to process what you saw in your building. He offers you his shower if you'd like, and when you brought up you didn't have any clothes, he searched for a clean t-shirt and sweatpants you could borrow from him.
A shower is just what you need as you let the water cascade down your body. Fire aside, it has been a great day, even before Han asked you on a date. Hope fills your being at the prospect of soon beginning a relationship with Han. So far, everything points out it can happen. There haven't been any red flags or hesitation from him.
You change into the oversized t-shirt Han picked out for you and the spare pair of underwear you always carry in your bag. Smart girls know to carry a spare in case of emergencies. You debate about wearing the sweatpants he left for you but choose against it. The t-shirt covers enough.
You shyly make your way out of the bathroom in search of Han. You find him in the bedroom, grabbing an extra pillow and blanket. "The bed is yours," he mentions, eyes briefly trailing your naked legs.
"Where will you sleep?" You ask, furrowing your eyebrows. If anyone has to sleep on the couch, it should be you.
"I'll take the couch," he responds, as you expected.
"Han, stop being a gentleman and get in bed with me," you say, taking the pillow from his grasp and placing it back on the top of the bed.
He offers you an 'Are you sure?' look, and you nod confidently. He doesn't need to be told twice. Han steps out of the bedroom for a few minutes and grabs a shower. Taking that time, you get on the bed to get comfortable, it's soft, and you sink into it.
You're snoozing off when he returns to the room. Han carefully peels back the sheets and gets under them. Feeling the bed dip, you turn to the side to face him.
Your sleepy mood makes you cuddle up to him without much thought. The smell of his soap invades your senses. Han naturally accepts it, throwing an arm around your waist and hugging you closer, legs intertwined. He kisses the top of your head, finding comfort in the position.
Thankful doesn't begin to cover how you feel. There's this overwhelming sense of security that comes with Han. There is something about him that makes you trust him. Deep down, you know he wouldn't intentionally hurt you.
"How are you feeling?" Han checks up on you before you fall asleep.
"I'm okay. I hope none of my things got damaged," you mumble into his chest, pressing a kiss into it afterward. "Thank you for everything, Han. Your help with the car, the date, letting me invade your bed," you finish with a soft laugh.
"Anytime, Angel," he responds truthfully. If he can help you in any way, he will. Sleep consumes both quickly after, and it becomes the best night you've both had in a while.
The following day you're the first to wake. Han's arms are around your waist, and you feel his breath tickle the back of your neck. He's warm, and you just want to sink into it even more. Your need to pee pries you out of his embrace, though. 
As carefully as possible, you slip out of his loose grasp and head to the bathroom. Han had picked out a toothbrush for you the night before, which you're thankful for. Shuffling out of the bathroom, you cook breakfast for Han as a 'thank you' for his hospitality.
You pick the ingredients you need from his fridge, careful not to make too much noise. Your progress is slower than you prefer as you get used to the kitchen layout and localize everything you might need.
Soon enough, you drop pancake batter into the pan, and while that cooks, you scramble eggs with veggies. Since it's his kitchen, you assume he'll like what you make. It's his ingredients, after all.
Just after finishing the last batch of pancakes, you hear the patter of Han's feet entering the kitchen. You turn to glance at him quickly and greet him, "Good morning! I made you breakfast, sit!"
"You didn't have to do that," Han says, coming up behind you. He traps you between his body and the stove as if having you close last night wasn't enough.
"Yes, I did! You let me stay here, borrow clothes, sleep in your bed," you flip the pancakes as you count all the nice things he's done in less than 24 hours.
Humming, unconvinced, Han kisses your cheek and thanks you. It sends a tingle between your legs as his voice is raspy and deep from sleep. Your cheeks flare up, betraying you as always.
Han follows your orders and sits by the kitchen table, waiting till you're done to begin eating. With that time in his hands, he observes you. You're wearing the t-shirt he loaned you, which swallowed your frame. Each time you flipped a pancake, it rose slightly to reveal the light green fabric of your panties. Han soaked the sight in and wondered if this was what waited for him in the near future.
His eyes continue trailing down to your thick thighs. He wouldn't mind being trapped between them. Lower and lower, his gaze went from your pretty legs to your varnished toes. Back up, it went as you turned off the stove and approached the table. You weren't wearing a bra under the t-shirt, as your nipples poked through the thin fabric.
Han's glad he didn't notice these things last night, or he wouldn't have been able to sleep a wink. Spreading his legs, he tried to hide the hard-on he was sporting. None the wiser, you sit on the empty chair near him and tell him to eat up.
Shooing the dirty thoughts from his mind, Han thanks you one more time and digs in. It's a lovely morning, with light chatter bouncing between you. Han praises your cooking every chance he gets and even finishes the pancakes you left over but not before drenching them in more syrup. When both of you are done, you clear the plates and place them in the sink to wash.
"Angel, come 'ere," Han calls from behind you.
Mindlessly you walk over to him, wondering what he wants. Han grabs your waist, pulling you to his lap. "Han, what are you doing? I have to do the dishes!" You squeal, holding onto him, afraid he'd let you fall.
"No, you don't," he speaks softly, one hand cupping your cheek.
"I don't?" you prompt, leaning into his touch.
"Let me properly thank you," he offers, lips chasing yours. Han can't contain himself any longer. You've done a number on him, strutting around his kitchen in your underwear. He wants you. He needs you.
You lean into the kiss as you always do, pouring everything you have into it. Tasting the coffee on his tongue, you bring your hand around the back of his neck, softly tugging the long strands of hair. Han groans into the kiss, having missed that sensation.
Repositioning yourself, you straddle Han in the rickety kitchen chair. You feel his hands all over your body, trailing down your back to grasp your ass in his palms. Every so often, you'd resurface to breathe but dip down again and again to continue kissing him.
Han feels himself harden as you rub your center against him deliciously. It's clear as day you want him just as much as he wants you.
"Want to spoil me and fuck me?" You breathe heavily, kissing Han's neck.
"So bold," Han chuckles, his hands wandering under the t-shirt to feel your warm skin, his nails faintly scratching your back, sending shivers down your spine. "Six months ago, you would've been too scared to ask me that."
Six months ago, you would've been too scared to kiss him on the cheek, but you've come a long way. As time passes, you realize your feelings are not one-sided because Han means every word he speaks to you despite his taunting nature. Each and every complement is honest.
"I got tired of waiting around for you," you bite back, nipping his neck and sucking a pretty bruise on it.
Han hisses at the momentary sting, "I thought I was just a friend?"
You laugh sarcastically, picking your head up to stare at him, "I don't let friends kiss me or grope my ass."
"What does that make me then?" Han raises an eyebrow, cheekily squeezing your ass as a smirk forms on his lips.
"Special," you shrug, lips pouty and swollen.
"Because?" He wants to hear you say that you feel something for him. It's a last hurrah on giving you a hard time for fun.
You realize it's time to be honest and come out with it. You stopped hiding your feelings a while ago. Hell, you even asked Han to fuck you. All that's left is to admit your feeling out loud. "Because I have feelings for you, Han Lue," you whisper, brushing the hair that threatens to fall over his eyes.
"That's all you had to say," Han murmurs, catching your lips in a passionate kiss.
The heat rises with each passing moment. Your feelings have now come to a boil and bubbled over. Han picks you up easily and sits you on the kitchen table. He leaves his touch on your naked back to trace the outside of your thighs. It's time to give you precisely what you asked for and what he has been fantasizing about for far too long.
Grabbing the elastic band of your panties, Han slides them down the curve of your ass and your thighs until they are off. He throws them somewhere in the room, the information unimportant for now.
"Han, please," you whine, spreading your legs wider and giving him access to your most private part. You beg between kisses to feel his touch where you need it most.
"So impatient, Angel." Han jabs lightly as his right-hand touches the inside of your thigh. The pads of his fingers brush over your thighs repeatedly, nearing the apex more and more with each stroke.
You gasp as he finally dips a finger into your folds, gathering the slick that formed to spread it around your bundle of nerves. You gasp, breaking the kiss and throwing your head back.
Han sucks on your neck and collarbones as you moan into the air. Slipping a finger into your tight walls, he groans, thinking about how they'll feel around his hard cock.
"Fuck, Han, feels so good," you sigh when Han adds another digit into your soaking core and presses on your clit with his thumb.
"I didn't realize I made you this wet," he says into your neck as you grind your hips into his hand. You must've been wanting this for as long as he has.
"Liar," you respond, staring at him with hooded eyes. The nights you've touched yourself while thinking about him are many. The real thing is a million times better.
Han watches you intently, catching every little reaction you have to his touch. The moans and whines echo through the room and are music to his ears. Without a doubt, there's a wet patch in his boxers as his tip leaks precum from the erotic sight in front of him.
Your walls clenching around him alert him you're close, and promptly after you make it known as you beg him not to stop, except he doesn't listen and stops just as you're about to cum.
"Why did you stop?" You complain, eyes wide in desperate need.
"Want you to cum on my tongue," he responds, stealing a quick kiss before he kneels on the floor. Wrapping his strong arms around your thighs, he scoots you closer to the edge.
His words shoot another current down your legs, no doubt making more of a mess. You wait with bated breath as Han kisses the inside of your thighs, making eye contact with you as he delves into your pussy.
He licks up from your hole up to your clit. You grasp his hair with one hand, pulling the t-shirt up with the other to better look at him going down on you. Your eyes roll involuntarily when Han wraps his lips around your clit, sucking and flicking it with his tongue. His long fingers find your opening once more, sliding in effortlessly.
You try to maintain eye contact with Han through it all. If his hair fell on his eyes, you'd quickly brush it back, not wanting to miss his lustful gaze. It spurred Han on to see you crumbling over him, biting your lip as you tried to hide the pretty cries that wanted to fall from your lips.
Han stops licking your clit and slows his thrusting fingers each time you near your orgasm. Time and time again, he repeats this when you're near the edge. Only when your arousal coats his hand he keeps his pace, and as you whine out, 'gonna cum, don't stop,' he slips his tongue into your pussy, tasting your cum directly from the source.
He makes a great example of what his nose can do as it brushes over your clit while he tongue fucks you. You trap Han between your legs as your pussy clenches, your orgasm coming in waves. As you relax back onto the kitchen table, Han continues to lick your puffy center, being careful with your sensitive nub.
When he stands, you fist his t-shirt, smashing your lips together, tasting your essence. "Let's take this to the bedroom," Han pants. You nod eagerly and squeal when he picks you up, your legs wrapped around his waist.
You leave a trail of kisses on his neck as he makes his way to the bedroom. Once there, you both fall on the bed, Han hovering over you. He tugs on your t-shirt, "As much as I love seeing you in my clothes, this has to come off."
Without the shirt, he can admire your naked body. A lone finger slides down from your neck to your sternum. It slides to your side near the curve of your left breast, where a small sakura flower is tattooed.
"This is my new favorite thing about you," Han softly says, noticing you staring at him.
The tattoo was an impulsive thing to do. You had wanted a tattoo for years but never knew what to get. After your last breakup two years ago, you got the little flower instead of getting bangs and dying your hair. It has no real meaning to you. It's just a cute flower.
"You're the first to see it since I got it done," you tell him, a laugh bubbling from your lips as his touch on your ribs tickles.
"And I hope it stays that way," he responds. It's an unspoken promise. He wants you all to himself for the foreseeable future.
His finger continues the trajectory down your tummy, lightly going over your belly button before it traces over your mound and dips to touch your clit.
You gasp at the surge of pleasure as your clit remains sensitive from his previous actions. "Gotta say it's not fair that I'm the only one naked," you moan when Han continues to circle your nub.
"What are you gonna do about it?" Han incites you to see what you'll do.
Any remaining shyness you had is long gone as lust replaces it. You kneel in front of Han, who leans back to watch you. Your chest is close to his face, so when you lean closer to grab the hem of his shirt, he sucks one of your nipples. 
"Han," you whine, arching your back," "Stop distracting me."
Ignoring his mouth on you, you grab his shirt and pull it off. Successfully making him stop his attack on your breasts. You peck his lips and kiss down his jaw.
You take your time kissing his toned chest and stomach. You wish to memorize every part of him. "You're so handsome, Han," you purr, glancing up at him.
Those simple words that spilled from your mouth made his heart flutter. Han is used to being the one to dish out compliments and praise the women he's with. To have you say that is like a breath of fresh air, and he can't wait to have more.
"Fuck, Angel," he groans, grasping your chin. You kiss his palm with a smile that's equally angelic and devilish.
You want to peel two more layers off Han's body and decide to do it all at once. Grasping the band of his pants and boxers, you slowly pull them down, building anticipation.
His cock springs out of its confines, landing on Han's abdomen. You don't hide your curious gaze as you take in his cock. It's so big it makes you bite your lip in anticipation. The tip is a dark pink as it drips with precum.
After you remove his pants entirely, you grasp his cock, feeling the warmth and weight of it. Han breathes out through his nose, a futile attempt to keep his cool. A string of saliva drips from your lips, coating his hard length. Each stroke you made caused a bead of pre to spill from him.
You take it as an invitation to taste him, wrapping your lips around his head your tongue licks the beads of white. 
Han does the impossible not to push your head down to take all of him. The thought is present, though. You've barely teased him compared to how he teased you, but Han can no longer resist. 
"I need you," Han groans, calling out your name, not the nickname you've been donned for the past three years.
You don't take it for granted. Hearing your name sends you into overdrive. Han pulls you up to kiss you and lies you down on the top of the bed. He comfortably gets between your legs that hug his waist to bring him closer. His cock brushes your wet pussy, and you both hiss at the sensation. Your pussy clenches around nothing at the thought of having Han fill you entirely.
"You ready, Angel?" Han asks you. One arm holding him up and the other wrapped around your thigh, giving you a comforting squeeze. Time stops ticking at that moment. It's just you and Han wrapped in each other. 
"I've been ready for the past month, Han. Fuck me, please," you plead quietly, your fingertips running up and down his back. 
"Just because you said, please." Han lines his cock up to your entrance and pushes past your lips into your warm center. Relief floods through the both of you, but it soon dissipates, and it's replaced by waves of unfiltered lust.
Han starts fucking into you deep, at the perfect pace. Your eyes involuntarily close as you feel Han's cock stretching you open and filling you like never before. Han kisses your temple and releases sexy moans into your ear with words of encouragement.
'Such a tight pussy just for me.'
'Taking me so good, Angel.'
'Can't get enough of you.'
You echo his words, encouraging him to keep fucking you. Your nails dig into his back as you try to hold on to anything, and your heels dig into his lower back. The closeness between you is intoxicating, your scents mixing and becoming one, his hair ticking your face, his warm skin heating up yours. 
Han slows the pace momentarily, leaning back on his knees to see your pretty cunt taking his cock. He wants to commit to memory how your pussy spreads to make way for his cock, a white ring on the base of his cock, and how your little clit is exposed and vulnerable to his touch.
The other girls he's slept with only got part of his attention and dedication. He didn't mean to make a huge impression. He only did his job, often choosing to lie back and let them do as they pleased with him. 
With you, it's different. He wants to give you his all and leave a great impression. He'll do all the work; you can just take it if that's what you want. That's the difference between you and the other girls. He lived to spoil you.
Meanwhile, you fall apart under him, moaning incoherent phrases he can barely make out. He loves hearing them, though. You reach for Han's hand as he increases his pace and grips it tightly.
Han slips his cock out of you, wanting to make his fantasy a reality. You shudder at the empty feeling and whine, "No, don't stop." 
"Come on, Angel. Get on your knees," Han coo's at you, kissing your pouty lips. "Promise you'll cum soon."
Han positions you on your knees, your back arched as your tits rub against the bed sheets. You huff through it all, desperate to have him pounding into you again. He smacks your ass when you wiggle it to get him to do what you want.
Han enters you in one smooth motion, this position amplifying your pleasure as he hits the spongy spot inside of you more directly.
"Han!" You cry out, fisting the sheets underneath you. 
"I'm right here, Angel," Han breathes, snapping his hips rhythmically. 
Just as he visualized, he grabs your hips in his large hands and digs his thumbs into the dimples on your back. With a tight hold, he thrusts into you unrelentingly, and you push back onto him just as eagerly. Your cries are muffled by the pillow you're hugging to your face.
Your pussy swallows him with each thrust, even as it clenches to prepare for orgasm. He can't hold back any longer as his balls clench with each faltering thrust, and your walls squeeze him tighter than ever.
" 'm cumming," you squeal, your legs tense up and shake. Your walls contract and release in a rhythmic motion that sends Han over the edge, your name on the tip of his tongue.
Han pulls out of you, helping you get back onto a comfortable position, and lies beside you, catching his breath. He turns to look at you, and you do the same. You can't hold his gaze long as you furiously blush.
Han laughs, grabbing your hand to lace your fingers together. "You can't get shy now!"
"I can't control it!" You exclaim, hiding your face with the same pillow as earlier. 
The rest of the day is spent in bed. Han ignores his daily responsibilities and stays in, getting lost in your touch and making promises he hopes to keep.
Tumblr media
One Year and a Half Later...
You drive up to the empty parking complex. It's similar to the one you spend your nights on. Driving up the floors, you find Han where he told you he'd be. He leans against the familiar orange car, a bag of chips in his hands. A nice lather jacket covers his arms, making you smile when you remember how he got it in the first place.
"Hey, you wanted to meet me here?" You question, getting out of your car.
Approaching him, you kiss his salty lips and wait for an explanation regarding the random meet-up spot. In the entire year and a half of you dating, he's never asked you such a weird request.
"You feeling up to race?" Han asks you, holding your hand in his.
It's been years since the two of you met, and for the same amount of time, people have been pining you two to race. He denied every request, including the ones you threw every once in a while.
"It's about time," you exclaim, excitement filling your body. "What's at stake?"
There is something up Han's sleeve. You know that much. There is something he wants from you if he suddenly wants to race you. He could just ask. You'll give him everything he desires. You play along, though.
"Winner gets the other's car," he offers, pushing himself off the car to wrap his arms around you to hug you, his thumb soothingly brushing over the spot where your tattoo is. He last saw you when you left for your new engineering job early in the morning.
"You're willing to sacrifice your car?" You chuckle, implying you are going to win.
"It's only fair," he shrugs, kissing your cheek.
With one last peck, he lets you go and gets in his car. You follow his lead, lining up your car to the imaginary starting line. Han sets up a timer, and once it went off, both cars lurched forward at high speeds. 
You focus on the race, forgetting it's Han you're competing with. You've been dying to go against him for so long, desperate to find out who was the better racer between the two. 
As expected, Han makes it hard for you. The race is neck and neck as you drift up the floors of the building. Whenever Han takes the lead, you find a way to get ahead. You see the end near, and Han threatens to surpass you, but with one last boost, you keep your position, winning the race.
You leap out of your car, feeling the high of the race. No one has kept you on your toes for so long. It's a satisfying win. Han walks out of his car more calmly, smiling, happy to see you celebrate. It didn't matter to him that you were better. You deserved it.
"I can't believe I won," you exclaim, jumping into his arms as he spins you around.
"I can, and I'm so proud," Han says, kissing all over your face.
The race's prize is forgotten as you celebrate, but Han reminds you by handing you his keys, "A deal is a deal." You take the keys from him as a mere formality. You're not taking Han's precious car. Racing him is enough for you.
The weight of the keys is strange to you. They tend to be much heavier. Opening your palm to inspect them, you see that his keychains and spare keys are missing. In their place is a diamond ring.
"Han, what-" you stutter, whipping up to look at him.
"My car is yours. I figured I could be yours too. Will you marry me?" Han takes the keys from you, getting down on one knee and removing the ring from the holder. 
From all the possible scenarios you had in mind from this clandestine meeting, Han's proposal was not one of them. Nevertheless, you have your answer instantly.
"Yes," you nod, choking back a sob.
Han grabs your hand and slides the ring onto your fourth finger. It's a perfect fit, just like Han. You drop down in front of Han, ignoring the dirty floor, to kiss and hug him.
Han kisses away your tears, a smile permanently etched on his face. He never thought he'd see the day he would settle down, but this past year has been near perfection with you, and he doesn't see himself with anyone else.
"Did you let me win to set this up?" You ask him later that night. His arms are wrapped tightly around you as you lie on his chest.
"No," he answers simply, kissing your head.
"You let me win," you then say assertively.
"No, I did not, Angel," he answers again, hiding his smile in your hair.
"I don't believe you. We have to race again," you tell him, lifting your head to glance at him.
"I don't have a reason to. I've got everything I want right here. Take the win, Angel," Han tells you sweetly, his fingers playing with your ring.
"For now," you huff, settling back down and cuddling up to him.
Fin. 
Tumblr media
thank you for reading! i didn't mean for it to be this long although i'm sure you guys are not complaining!
this was so much fun to write. guys like i am in love with han lue, i've spent hours on tiktok watching han lue and sung kang edits. i need help! tell me i'm not the only one like this!
requests are still open ❤️
2K notes · View notes
tomatopers · 7 months
Text
❝ I'm. . . late?! ❞
Tumblr media
in honor of me also forgetting vday :,) here is my first post for this acc !! I also need to remember to make an intro post n stuff, and hopefully i'll make some friends on here eventually </3 i see ppl interacting with their anons/followers and it's sooo cute when will that be me !!!!
Tumblr media
They forgot Valentine's Day... surely the nineteenth is just as special? Diluc, Zhongli x GN!Reader (separate)
Tumblr media
Diluc watched you silently from a window, the sunny scene outside feeling worlds away from his own dim office. You were sitting on the stone wall surrounding the Dawn Winery, pretending to read one of his boring novels while pointedly ignoring him. He was very often unaware of his stumbles, this being his first relationship, but wouldn't he would catch on soon enough?
Sure it was immature to still act huffy at this age, but Valentine's day was 5 days ago! Not one! FIVE! You had to witness Lisa flirting with the Acting Grand Master for hours, which wasn't uncommon in the slightest, but the librarian seemed to make use of all her cheesy lines on the holiday.
The stone was frigid beneath your bare legs, and you were reminded that the sun hadn't yet begun to do its job this early in the month as your legs grew numb. Perhaps on this fifth day of snubbing your lover, you'd spend the night at a bar- maybe even in Venti's company, or Kaeya's. That last ditch effort to get him to notice your huffy behavior never failed.
The worst part of this whole affair was that you couldn't even be disappointed or properly upset in peace. How could you, when this was clearly not an intentional mishap? Diluc worked diligently, and was far more dependable than most; Though, this trait of his only served to deepen your guilt. Perhaps you should apologize for this childish behavior... Maybe talk it out like proper adults...
6 o'clock found you on a barstool at Angels' share, a little early for drinking but the glass in your hand was clearly not your first. Kaeya sat to your right, an arm resting on the counter as he lent an ear to your woes. Venti stood to your left, strumming his lyre quietly and pitching in jests during the quieter moments.
The door opened at 7 on the dot, and you turned around despite knowing who stood behind you. The backlighting of the evening sun made his hair glow like fire, exaggerating the irritation on Diluc's face to resemble anger. You stood up, slightly tipsy but no less aware, and grasped Kaeya's shoulder to steady yourself before walking forward.
"Good evening, Master Diluc. What brings you here so early?" He seemed to glare at you before casting a glance at Charles. The bartender visibly jumped, quickly bowing a greeting before averting his eyes as Diluc grabbed your wrist and tugged you out of the bar. His grip, though firm, wasn't the slightest bit painful- even now, in whatever bitter mood he was in, Diluc always treated you with the utmost care.
You felt even more guilty for acting the way you did.
He released his hold on you in a more private space, tucked behind a couple trees, and waited. Just as you knew he would seek you out immediately after work, he knew you'd soon crumble under his stare and explain what you wanted. Those red eyes, sometimes blazing with anger or warm with love, were now passive and unreadable.
"Well?"
You felt heat behind your eyes, feeling the tears before they could escape down your cheeks. How stupid. It was hard to form a sentence between sniffles, so you stood and cried as he enveloped you in a hug. Maybe you had more than a few drinks back at the bar...
When your tears were all but spent, you gripped his hand in embarrassment, unable to meet his gaze. "...I'm sorry."
"What for?"
You sighed, "I've been such a child about this, it honestly wasn't even that important yet I-"
"If it bothered you, then it's important. To me."
There it was again, the ever chivalrous Diluc and his overflowing compassion when it came to you. Despite the temptation to lie and play it off, you sheepishly admitted, "It's just that, uh- a few days ago, it was Valentine's day... and we didn't really um- celebrate together... But! It's okay! You do so much already and I honestly don't need to do anything for some silly holiday when we can do stuff like that any day and.."
Looking up, you trailed off into a confused silence. Diluc's face was red, and he was the one now avoiding your eyes. "I'm- My apologies. I admit, it did slip my mind, but that is no excuse. It's more than a silly holiday, and as such, I would be honored if you would allow me an attempt to make it up to you." You burst out laughing, and he looked relieved. You really had no reason to be upset, not with this cute of a lover.
"I would allow you all the attempts possible, Mr. Ragnvindr. All the attempts and more." He smiled and took your hand, giving it a gentle squeeze as you followed him out of the alley. "Shall we visit that famous traveling chef then, darling? I heard he's in town. Or the Good Hunter, for something casual? Or perhaps we could buy you one of those gorgeous necklaces they have at the-"
You pulled him in by his collar, feeling him stiffen at the kiss before relaxing. "Diluc, sweetheart, I was thinking something closer to home? I can make dinner, and," you gestured at the setting sun, "the night is still young, I'm sure we can have some... fun, in that great big house of yours."
He turned an even brighter red, trying to cover his blush with the hand you weren't holding. "...That would be perfect."
Tumblr media
It was rarer for Zhongli to go a day without speaking to you than it was for him to remember his wallet. That's why it was evident to even those around you that there was something amiss. You worked at a teahouse, and that just happened to be where Zhongli's favorite tea was sold. When you weren't working, you'd help out at the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, or stroll with him along the boardwalk. Plenty of time together, to say the least.
When the regulars witnessed you not serving the consultant's tea, as you always did, it immediately became a source of chatter- Some of the older women were having quite a laugh about young lovers' quarrels, though your relationship with Zhongli was far past the "young love" stage. As you walked from table to table, it was hard to ignore his stare practically burning holes through you.
The first whole hour of his visit must've passed this way; your every movement under the scrutiny of the ex-archon, your coworkers, and half the guests in the teahouse. Your work wasn't any different than usual, no. In fact, you might even be more productive now that you weren't stopping to chat with Zhongli whenever your hands were free. The owner of the place would never admit it, but he too was curious of the predicament under his roof.
Your scheduled break was minutes away, the one you would typically spend at Zhongli's table, but you clearly didn't intend to do so today. For a being such as him, it was inevitable that certain things would slip his mind, but Valentine's Day? You had planned out the entire day as a surprise, the holiday had even fallen on one of Zhongli's leisure days, but he called in the morning to tell you he'd be assisting the Traveler and would not come by. It wasn't even a brief task! He was gone for five days!
It wasn't like you hadn't told him anything, either. "Oh illustrious Rex Lapis, God among men, I beseech your presence in my humble abode on the final day of this week." He had chuckled at your attempt of mimicking the speech of those who cowered before him in his days of glory, taking your hand with a smile and a kiss. It was going to be perfect! But the plans were discarded, and the cake you made still sat untouched in the fridge...
Xingqiu walked in with his usual cheerful wave, heading to the back corner where he'd spend a couple hours reading; As though he noticed your restlessness, he smiled and offered you a seat to join him, "I'll take you up on your offer to regale me with the stories from your trip overseas, if I may?" You smiled back, "Of course! I'll bring the tea and join you."
You spent your break with the young man, and the following remainder of the shift passed with ease. At some point, Zhongli had disappeared- had he gotten upset? Most likely not, such a small matter was far from enough to garner his irritation. It was more likely that work had called for his presence. Maybe he'd notice shop owners taking down their holiday wares on his walk and remember his oversight.
You hung up your apron, bidding the staff goodnight before descending the stairs to head home. Someone was standing at the entrance to a darker alley, one tucked away from the streetlights and the watchful eyes of the Millelith. Quickening your pace, you were about to pass by when a voice, his voice, stopped you in your tracks.
"My dear, won't you tell me what has drawn your ire?" Zhongli stepped forward, his confused expression revealing his failure to decipher the issue alone. "I am unaware of any shortcoming, but I assure you it was far from intentional-"
"..."
He walked closer, "Pardon?" You looked up at him, hoping you didn't look pathetically sad. "It was Valentine's Day, the day you left for that trip with the Traveler. That's why I had invited you over." His face fell, his immediate regret making it nigh impossible to retain your frustration. "I will not make any excuses, beloved, it was entirely my fault that we could not celebrate such a wonderful day together-"
"It was, yes."
"-and I believe I grasp the value of celebrating love with a romantic partner, so while it won't compare, please join me for dinner tomorrow, where I can properly demonstrate my affections. I recall you liking when I cook, and surely such a thing is enjoyable together."
You pretended to consider the matter, before laughing and accepting his outstretched hand. "I would love to join you, and I hope I may occupy your time through the night as well." You saw his gaze sharpen for a moment before he swept you off your feet and into his arms.
"If I didn't know any better, my love, I'd think you were trying to tempt me."
"Whatever gave you that idea, darling?"
Without setting you down, he pressed a kiss to your forehead. "I believe you wouldn't protest to spending tonight together, as well?" You could feel the laughter rumbling through his chest, could see the smile splitting his face even with your face hidden behind your hands from the embarrassment. "My most adorable lover, I shall never again miss an opportunity to exhibit the extent of my affection for you."
541 notes · View notes
causenessus · 2 months
Note
Hi! Congratulations on your 1K, you really deserve it! I've just seen your post about your event and was thinking of sending something. Could you write ⭐️ with Sakusa where the reader is his roommate and suffer from insomnia ? And could the reader be personality-wise like Sakusa, but the two are already close friends or whatever you want them to be ? This is maybe silly lol, anyway thank you for this event it’s really cool!
can't sleep? | sakusa k.
sakusa x f!reader
written in second person
one word prompt from 1k followers event: ⭐ -> insomnia
"maybe i'll just place my hands over you and close my eyes real tight. there's a light in your eyes and you know <3" from look on down from the bridge by mazzy star
word count: 2.8k words
anon. thank u for this. u have fed all the omi girlies well tonight <3 thank you so much for requesting and i hope you enjoy this fic!!!
notes: lots of fluff <3 THEY ARE STRETCHING!!! JUST STRETCHING TOGETHER i stress this bc i couldn't take myself seriously and even y/n has a moment of "should i ask what we are after this?" but they're just stretching okay. also i frequented this list of stretches and literally followed its order so in case you want to know what stretch they're doing LMAO THIS SOUNDS SO WEIRD I'M SORRY 😭 i attempted to proofread this!!! but i'm sorry for any typos </3
THANK YOU TO @nectardaddy FOR HELPING ME DECIDE ON A COLOR AND MAKING ME VERY EXCITED TO WRITE THIS!! I HOPE YOU ALSO ENJOY IT <3
Tumblr media
kiyoomi likes his routines. he likes to be home by a certain time, eat dinner at a certain time, make sure the dishes are washed, and then he likes to retire to bed by a certain time. when he decided to find a roommate in order to split costs, he had been slightly worried that his routines would be ruined, but the universe had worked in his favor.
you had been his first option. he hadn’t even tried to send out messages to anyone else "just in case you declined his offer," he had just simply hoped you would say yes. you were quite frankly everything he could hope for as a roommate; he had known from the times you'd hung out throughout your years in high school that you liked things to be clean similar to him, and trying to find a time for you both to meet up throughout college meant he knew that your current schedules would line up nicely.
and luckily you had agreed enthusiastically, excited to move in with one of your closest friends. it eased your mind to know he would also be organized and keep to himself, which was not something you could say if you had moved in with someone like atsumu (would only become a reality if you had no other option) or osamu (you would consider it, after a lot of convincing and compromising).
and kiyoomi had been right. the decision to room had worked out perfectly in nearly every way. you always got home before him and would make your own dinner and take care of your dishes, leaving the place empty and spotless for him by the time he returned. sometimes, you even left notes for him, saying you had leftovers that he was free to eat if he wanted. 
and it wasn’t that he didn’t want to see you. you were good friends, after all, and one of the few people he found he could always tolerate even when a day had stressed him out. but you both had agreed that you liked having time in the kitchen to yourself rather than two of you trying to be in there at the same time. it wasn’t anything personal; you were both independent people who valued their alone time. and when he saw you around the apartment, he never failed to talk to you, even if it was just a small nod of acknowledgment. you always had a calm and collected kind of demeanor, which he reasoned he liked because it was similar to him, in contrast to the men who had too much energy for their own good that he was surrounded by every day.
your similar attitudes had also led to a lot of shared nights together. sometimes on the nights when you stayed a little bit later at work or school, he would come home and you’d still be eating at the counter, zoned out on your phone, not even noticing him until he placed his bag on the table.
“oh, sorry, omi. welcome back, i can leave–”
“no, you’re fine. stay there,” he’d cut you off.
he’d navigate around the kitchen, gathering what he needed while you continued eating your own meal. sometimes things were peacefully silent between you both as you resumed scrolling on your phone; you were just two roommates in their kitchen, illuminated by the warm light of a hanging lamp overhead. other times you asked him how his day was, and you would both chat while he made his own dinner, and if his day was bad, sometimes you invited him to watch a movie with you.
that was something that had confused him. he always was preparing himself to say no, that he was tired, or that he just wanted to be in bed in an hour, but instead he often found himself agreeing to the proposal. he realized after a bit of thought that it was because he liked being around you. he was willing to amend his routines to include you in them.
a friend had once warned him that he could never really know someone until he lived with them. and he had found that with you, he only liked you more once he started rooming with you. he liked how responsible and respectful you were with everything you did, aware of your surroundings and the space you shared with him. he found that he looked forward to seeing you every day, and when your door was shut, sometimes he felt conflicted. like he wanted to see you, but he didn't have the right to invade your space so instead, he was stuck alone in his own room, with you across the hall.
the only problem between you both (although he hated to call it that) was how late you stayed up. but even then, you tried to be careful about how loud you were, stepping quietly over the aged floorboards and using minimal lighting to navigate your way through the apartment. 
he wasn’t going to call you out for it. it was only a mild inconvenience, and he knew you couldn’t really help it. you had warned him before you moved in that sometimes you got restless at night, unable to sleep no matter how badly you wanted to.
he didn’t mind, he told you, and you had signed the lease. and truthfully, he didn't. but recently, your sleepless nights had become more frequent. for him, he rarely struggled with the problem. he could easily pass out on his bed at any time of the day. but sometimes he would wake up to your footsteps through the thin walls.
part of him worried for you, thinking to himself that this was what, the eighth day in a row he had woken up to you wandering around? while another part of him (a very cranky one) really wanted you to go to bed (for your sake and his own).
he stepped out of his room, blinking rapidly as he tried to adjust to the lighting of the living room lamp that was on. it wasn’t as bright as if you had turned on the overhead lights, but he’d just come from his pitch-black room.
you were curled up on the couch, knees pulled to your chest and biting the side of your thumb, still unable to get rid of how antsy you felt despite getting up from your bed. you looked up at him as he stepped into the room, the light of the screen reflecting against the side of your face, “oh god, omi. i’m sorry. i didn’t mean to wake you.”
the moment he sees the bags under your own eyes, any hint of irritation he felt about being woken up immediately fades. “it’s fine,” he says, coming to sit with you on the edge of the couch, “can you not sleep?”
you exhale a long breath through your nose at the question, “no. it’s been bad lately. i can’t fall asleep or i wake up a few hours later just feeling even more tired.”
“so you’re watching tv?” he says, raising his brows and looking at you. you purse your lips, pouting under his gaze, fidgeting with the sleeve of your shirt.
you give him a small nod, “yeah. i mean, i’m really tired but i can’t sleep so i came out here to watch something.”
“well screens aren’t going to help you fall asleep,” he chides and you sigh.
“i knew you were going to say that. but what else am i supposed to do?” you complain.
“have you tried stretching?” he suggests.
you look at him, brows raised in confusion, “no, why would i do that?”
he rolls his eyes at your sass but it can’t be helped. he really only knows about the benefits of stretching because they’ve been ingrained into his mind from years of volleyball, “it helps relax your body, especially when you're stiff or sore so that you can go to bed. it’s what i do when i can’t sleep.”
“oh,” you reply, playing with a stray string coming out of the couch.
it’s silent for a moment. “are you not gonna do it? are we just gonna sit here in silence?”
you look up at him in embarrassment, “well, i don’t know what stretches to do! you don’t have to stay up with me, omi. you can go back to sleep. i don’t want you to be tired tomorrow.”
he sighs, laying back and sinking into the couch, “i’m not sleeping until you do.”
“well then tell me what i should do,” you say, extending your legs in front of you, placing them firmly onto the ground so you’re sitting up.
he stands and your eyes follow him curiously, unsure of where he’s going. eventually, he’s standing behind you at the back of the couch, and turns your head forward so that you’re looking directly at the wall in front of you. “what are you doing?” you ask, body going rigid.
“i’m just guiding you through some of these stretches, relax,” he answers and feels you calm down, letting him push your head gently towards one shoulder. his hand is on your opposite shoulder, keeping it straight while you feel a stretch in your neck.
“thanks,” you mumble as he repeats the movement for the other side of your neck. he gives you a small “mhm” in response, focused on making sure you’re feeling the stretch without hurting you.
he ends up leading you to the ground, modeling the stretches for you so that you can follow along. he guides you to lay on your side, with one arm extended out in front of you while the other is behind you, and you face each other as you both lay there, arms mimicking a T.
you giggle, unable to control yourself as you stare into his eyes. “what’s so funny?” he chuckles, smiling at the sound of your laughter.
“i just feel so stupid right now,” you answer, shifting slightly in your position. “but this is helping a bit, i think. i’m feeling a little better.”
he hums in acknowledgment of your words, his smile staying on his face before you switch to the other side.
“what’s next?” you ask, sitting up.
“do you know what the cat-cow is?” he asks, brushing off his arms from where they touched the ground. when you look at him, mouth agape, he gives you a defensive look back, unsure of what caused your reaction. “what?” he says, tilting his head slightly.
“omi, i’m not getting on my hands and knees,” you say, embarrassed that you even have to explain yourself, but you’d rather say it than humiliate yourself further on all fours.
“oh my god,” he rolls his eyes, putting a palm to his face, “you’re turning this into something it’s not. i’m not gonna look at you or anything. i’ll even turn away, okay? just do it, it’s good for you. i’m tired of hearing you complain about your back.”
you sigh dejectedly but comply, moving into the position. you can’t deny that you feel less stiff, but you also can’t help but overthink the entire situation. if anyone had told you a year ago that the man you had been crushing on for years was going to ask you to move in with him and months later he’d be on the floor stretching with you because he really wants you to be able to sleep, you would’ve laughed in their face.
but this was reality, and this felt like an intimate moment between you both. you were unsure of what to make of the situation; it had come as a big enough shock that he cared enough about your sleep. but you also shouldn’t have been that surprised. 'he’s just being a good friend,' you try to reason. he asked you to move in because no one in their right mind would want to live under the same roof as atsumu, and you both value a clean, organized house.
but where were you supposed to draw the line between friends and something more?
his careful attentiveness towards you had started to make you think that maybe he saw you as more of a friend as well. you never imagined that he would ever want you to stay in the kitchen with him while he was cooking when it had been a bad day, and you were even more surprised the first time he agreed to watch a movie with you. you considered yourselves good friends but you didn’t expect him to actually want to spend so much time with you on top of everything else he had going on. he never seemed to tire of seeing you around the house; instead, he always made sure to say hi or ask how your day had been.
you wanted to bring it up to him soon, you really did. the feeling was starting to eat away at you, and this night together wasn’t helping in the slightest.
after a few more stretches, you stood up, reaching your arms above you as you yawned. “think you’ll be able to sleep now?” he asks, following you up and dusting off his clothes.
the thought of going back to your stuffy room makes you drop your arms and the content look on your face fades away. you felt tired, but something about your room just felt so unwelcoming. you didn’t want to walk back in there, where the air would feel heavy, your mattress would be too stiff, your pillow too soft, and blanket too scratchy. there was always something that bothered you about your bed every night, and being alone with your thoughts again would prevent you from falling asleep. you’d be stuck tossing and turning in your bed on a bed that never felt clean or comfortable, you could already feel it. 
“what’s wrong?” he steps into your line of sight. you look up at him as a thought crosses your mind, making you immediately look back down at the ground, face turning red.
“um–” you start, and then immediately close your mouth. it was a stupid thought.
but what’s the worst he could do? say no? give you a disgusted look? kick you out into the cold after spending half an hour stretching with you? that last one was a little extreme, but maybe you’d say it and he’d laugh in your face. or gag (being dramatic, again). either way, whatever he said, if it wasn’t a yes, your life would be forever ruined.
“y/n,” he says, and you look back up at him, feeling like you’re about to collapse under the weight of his gaze. but your mouth opens, unable to keep it in.
“i just–” you have to stop to take in a deep breath, the words getting caught in your throat. he keeps looking at you the entire time, waiting to listen to what you have to say. “i don’t want to go back to my own bed,” you blurt, finally spitting it out. “it just doesn’t feel right. i don’t know how to explain it, but i know i won’t be able to sleep alone in my own bed. i’m sorry,” you add an apology on at the end, feeling embarrassed by your own confession.
when he doesn’t respond, you feel even worse. “nevermind, forget i said anything, i’m so sorry. thank you for helping me stretch, i’m going to go to bed now–” you spin on your heel, moving to run away as calmly as you can manage when he catches your wrist. you let out a small exclaim of surprise at the touch as he turns you back around.
“don’t apologize. and don’t lie to me. i want you to sleep,” he says, looking away as he runs a hand through his hair, preparing to say his next few words. “would it–” he shuts his mouth, feeling the anxiety settle in his chest, “would it help to sleep with me?”
neither of you are looking at each other. he’s staring at the wall and you’re looking at the floor, face hot and burning. “if you don’t mind, i think it would,” you whisper, just loud enough for him to hear and look back at you, letting out a breath he didn’t even realize he was holding in.
he’s still holding your wrist, too, he realizes, but he doesn’t let go. he runs a thumb along the side of your arm, grabbing your attention again. he’s looking you in the eyes, and he wants to tell you that he’s not uncomfortable with sleeping in the same bed as you. in fact, it’s quite the opposite, but he’s not sure what you’ll say back, so he settles for a neutral response, instead, “yeah. of course i’m fine with it.”
maybe in the morning, when he wakes up next to you, finds your limbs entangled with his under his sheets, and sees the sunlight peeking through the curtains and onto your skin, he’ll be able to choke out a three-word confession. but for now, he only leads you silently to his room, letting you slip under the covers first before he follows after, holding you close.
181 notes · View notes
captainjamster · 4 months
Note
Hey if you're comfortable with it, do you think you write about how 141 would react to finding out you're ticklish? Preferably nsfw. Maybe they just tease you with it or maybe they have a session with you after a while and enjoy how it drives you crazy. It could be poly141 or just a drabble with each members reaction.
I love your writing sm
I'm sorry this took a while anon, thank you so much for your request!! This is the first time I've written about tickling, so I hope it came out alright. I loved researching this lmfao it's so cute
Pairing(s): 141 x reader (separately, not poly or sharing this time sorry! :p) Warnings: Bondage and restraint, tickling, tickling during sex Wordcount: 1.2k Summary: How each of the boys enjoy tickling you :p AO3 Link: Right here! <3
Full drabbles under cut <3
Tumblr media
Price loves your laugh; just the sound can get him hard. Maybe you should’ve seen it coming from the first date. It was the first thing he complimented you on in the small bakery – heart eyes over the brim of his coffee cup that had your cheeks red, already breathless at the story between a cheeky sounding sergeant and someone’s poor dog. He stores every terrible joke exchanged amongst his boys, bringing them home just to fill your ears with them, to get anything from that exasperated little giggle to a shocked cackle at some of Ghost’s darker ones – the first time he hears you belly laugh, he writes the beginning of his wedding vowels.
For him, there’s a privilege in being allowed to bring you to such a vulnerable state, dazed and breathless, whether it’s scrabbling against the material of his shirt as you’re bent over in hysterics, hiding behind your hands, gasping for air at the comedy he’s been nagging you to watch, or between his thighs against the mattress, straining with hiccupped shrieks and pleads at his weight as he tortures your overstimulated skin. The only thing he uses is his fingers, and he’s stubborn about it, possessive of the tactile connection between his fingertips against your skin. The furthest he goes is a plug in your pussy, with a command to try and keep it there at the threat of a good spanking (though you both know you’re going to fail).
He challenges himself to make you come with just tickling – he neglects your needy pussy, wet and fluttering with arousal, until the delicate dragging of his nails down the plush insides of your thigh has you spasming around nothing.
-
Gaz, poor Gaz. Gaz, with blood under his nails he just can’t scrub, who sees someone’s face with every punch he throws at the bag. He’s heard the way his peers talk all throughout his service – spank their ass, slap their face, tight grip to the throat, till they ache.
There was only one part that ever stuck with him – till they ache.
The only time he raises a hand against you is to watch you squeal in anticipation before it flies down to your stomach, skittering up and down the soft skin as you twist and writhe against the sheets. It’s everything he needs – he can make you cry, beg, scream, with the whisp of a few touches, the softest of caresses. Tracing the marks that scatter your skin, only love bites and the imprints of restraint. On some nights, Gaz loves tying you up and tickling you, watching you squirm and contort against his ropes in an attempt to escape. The knots dip into your flesh, keeping your arms straight and pointed to the metal hook that meets the rope stemming from your wrists, legs spread wide with the thick bar anchoring your feet flat to the ground. His fingers dance over every inch of skin bare to him, honing to the areas you try to pull away from, watching you sway this and that way in peals of laughter as he switches between sides on your ribs.
Unlike Price, he doesn’t care for games – he’ll give you what you want. A toy, his fingers, his cock. Slow and steady, letting the rope drop a little to bend you at the waist, rocking back and forward into him, clenching down those slick and warm walls in sync with each ragged laugh. He doesn’t mind wielding a tickle wand, dragging the feathers up and down your thighs, your armpits, behind your knees. It’s not over until your eyes are puffy, cheeks tear stained as you sag under your own weight, kept suspended by the rope as your knees shake.
-
Soap becomes aware of your ticklish nature very quickly, being such a tactile partner. He’s always touching you – whether it’s an arm around your waist, foot rubbing against your calf, pinkies linked together – and it isn’t long before he unintentionally makes you squeal, accidentally brushing up against one of your most sensitive areas. The noise makes him jump, worried he’s hurt you, but when he sees the red of your cheeks and the shy smile on your face? Oh, it’s over for you.
“Y’ticklish, bonnie?”
He’s all a-grin every time, hands raising menacingly with wiggling fingers.
For a while it stays non-sexual, but poor Johnny can’t help himself. The tickle fights start to linger way past what’s appropriate, making home in his mind – how you get so panicked and squirmy, trying to get away from his fingers, your breathless laugh and gasps as his name whines so desperately from your lips. Your squeals rings through his ears during overdue paperwork in his late nights, so clear that he swears your lips brush across the tips of his ears, and Price avoids looking at him too closely as he turns in the files before leaving.
Sly, smart Johnny starts off slow. When the mood is playful during sex, he purposely rubs his hair and beard up against your neck, your back, feeling you pulse erratically around him with each giggle. He introduces it in increments, a foot in the door as you warm to the idea. Things really get going when he confesses, head buried in the crook of your neck as he groans how the way you flutter around his cock with each giggle brings him so close, and you can't help but laugh at that too. Poor Johnny comes harder than he ever has, and you can't help but want to indulge the glassy, lovestruck expression on his handsome face.
Unlike Gaz, he’d never restrain you - Johnny loves fighting you to stay still, caging you in or dragging you back by the ankle into his reach.
-
For Ghost, he loves the chase and anticipation beforehand, and his favourite way of being a pest – catch him brushing against just the right spot to make you jump and squeal as his arms slip around you, or his chin nuzzles into your neck.
But it starts with a morning of productivity, taken with your own domestic chores in a quiet co-existence. He’s finished a spot-tidy, bringing some discarded rubbish and checking on you in the kitchen. You’re unsuspecting, caught up in your respective daily activities, fixated on the job in front of you – and something hits him. The way you bob along happily to the music in your head, scrubbing at the dishes with a sway in your hips, caught up in your own world. Your happiness is magnetic, beckoning him and basking him in the same warm rush of dopamine. A light bubbles up through his body, something that forces its way from the depths of his chest more often when you’re around, and his feet are moving towards the kitchen before he thinks twice.
“Hey love?”
You hum questioningly, putting elbow grease into a particularly stuck blemish from the morning’s dishes.
“Got somethin’ for you.”
You finally turn around, soapy hands in the air as droplets cascade from them. Simon gives you a second to stare quizzically, watching your expression morph into a pleading grin as his hands creep up from his sides, fingers curling over into a leering grab.
“No! I’m washing dishes, please!”
His grin widens, fingers wiggling threateningly. “Then dry your hands.”
Your hands fall to your shirt, squeezing the material as you ready yourself to bolt. He squares up, arms outstretched, but he doesn’t close them as you swoop by close enough, out the kitchen in a mad dash. Though the chase is superficial, it doesn’t stop the thrill that jolts him with each impending step, following you through to the loungeroom. The sofa keeps him at bay, circling each other in a practiced synchronisation around the furniture as you feint left and right, keeping him guessing which way you’ll take off.
You bluff right to distract him from your plan to run the other way, but Simon lunges left anyway. He’s faster than you can think, reading the tensing of your muscles, and unable to rectify your charade as you scramble, his arms clamp around you in a swooping grab.
And as you gasp and giggle underneath him, something stirs to life.
Tumblr media
dividers by cafekitsune
200 notes · View notes
senblades · 4 months
Note
Hi :)
I love your art and your writing, and you have such a great grasp of these characters that I was wondering if you have any fic recs? Rating doesn't matter ;)
boy do I! (and ty for the compliment <3 <3 <3)
[cracks knuckles] alrighty:
The Dissapearence of Goro Akechi by Kupowonders - Probably my favourite fic ever, honestly- it's like. derailing the plot of persona 5 post-medjed thanks to the persona 4 accomplice ending years prior. (So, spoilers for p4 in that, too) it's. very good.
Marigolds by Colbub - Akechi gets ng+'ed to right when he started working for Shido, and has to take a good look at the future to come and be like "Aight how the fuck do I fix this". Fun times!
Daredevil, You've hit the wall by ez_cookie. Essentially, p5 Strikers but Sumire and Goro get to be in on the fun, too. And, there's a direct sequel currently being updated that's a similar premise for p5 Tactica. very very good stuff
A Tale of Two Tricksters by Zoe2k8 - Murder boyfriends! ...sort of? Angst! Angst and murder boyfriends! An oversimplification, obviously, but I'm not kidding when I say this fic is amazing and is also over a million words holy shit-
Throw away your mask by MollyPollyKinz - Another ng+ situation for Akechi, but this time the poor guy gets thrown all the way to 2009. You can imagine how well that goes (For the audience, less so for Akechi himself.)
The Crow Cries at Midnight by Dorked. hehe this one is very fun. Basically, a series of coincedencs causes Akechi to get thrown into the plot of persona 4. No time travel here! Just a grumpy 12/13 year-old Akechi trying to solve a murder mystery
The entire Tales of Chaos series by Eternalmomentss (The first one is called Like sand between your fingers) Very very good stuff! Something of a character study, I would say, of Ren and Goro. Plus, all the funky plot stuff that comes from trickster-typical bad luck and poor descision making. I really love this series hehe
uhh this post is getting very long I need to make this less wordy- lightning round?
Hunger for a life by Leonawriter - do you like vampires? I sure do! Mix that and the p5 plot and you get shenanigins. [evil laughter] a lot of shenanigins
Fishbowl by KivaEmber - Akechi has a terrible time in Maruki's reality. And I mean a terrible time
You have a beautiful smile underneath that mask by Saposaki - Akechi has a crush on Akira and Joker has a crush on Crow. No one is aware of the other's secret identity. Dramatic irony and hilarity ensues.
MASTERMiND by StumblingBlock - No Metaverse au where Akira really doesn't want to follow in the footsteps of his crime family, and fails miserably
Rose and Rot by SixteenJuniper - Read this!! I'm serious!! "A fun fantasy adventure" don't listen to Juniper. You'll be in tears by chapter two. (/pos, of course) (Seriously this fic is incredible)
Redressing the Balance by Convocated - ...almost a ng+? Ng+, in the sense that shuake are getting funky visions that are very quickly derailing the standard plot of p5r. This causes problems of the "Someone get the popcorn and maybe the tissues" variety
She's got a heartbeat full of lead (And she's aiming straight for the head) by Dots - This fic haunts me, often. In the best way possible, of course; but seriously, read it
Cracked into by SydneyHorses - Ren makes bad descisions and it becomes Akechi's problem. 2/2 timeloop, perhaps most notably featuring HaruGoro friendship! Love love love this fic
Okay that wasn't as "less wordy" as I intended but it'll do
Aaaand that's a wrap! Sorry for the long post.. and this is by no means all of the fics that I've ever loved (nor are the ones here in any particular order) but I swear we'll be here all week if I keep going HAHA
ty for the ask (and again for the kind words), anon! Hope this was helpful and to your tastes! (I... hope you like Shuake HAHA it's present in most of these- I assume you do, since you came to me (points at literally everything shuake I've made) of all people, but uh. Some of these fics are gen if it's not to your liking?)
187 notes · View notes
the-massive-simp · 5 months
Note
I've been thinking about fem/gn reader losing their virginity to kaeya, venti and kaveh... But maybe they accidentally get hurt and have to stop? I wanna know how they'd act when something like that happens (:
a/n: I love this kind of prompt <3 here you go anon! I'm slowly trying to fight writer's block so its only headcanons and not drabbles but I tried my best. sadly there's no venti because i dont really feel comfortable writing suggestive or nsfw things with him (i know i got your request before changing my rules so you did nothing wrong. sorry for the inconvenience). and remember everyone: a yes can turn into a no at any moment, and that's completely fine. consent is key. also I think that my love for kaveh shows in this one because his part is twice kaeya's one
warnings: it's not graphic smut but sex is mentioned so don't read if you're uncomfortable with that. no mentions of protections (make sure use them irl)
♡Kaeya♡
I imagine Kaeya being a super sex positive person, like for him sex is not a big deal as long as there's respect for the other person
so he was probably ready to have sex with you since you started dating 💀
but of course he didn't push you, he waited for you to be ready to have your first time with him
one time you have dinner at his place and an heated make up sessions evolves in discarding eachother clothes
he asks for your consent like 100 times while you two move to the bedroom
he knows how important foreplay is, so he makes sure to prepare you for the main act
then he slowly pushes himself in, an heavy breath leaving his lips as he hides his face in your neck, his arms supporting him so he doesn’t put all of his weight on you
you immediately feel uncomfortable
the stretch feels too much and its almost painful
at first you think it's normal but it doesn't go away even after he begins to gently trust in you
if anything, it gets worse, but he fails to notice tour discomfort
tears start to spill from your eyes as you put your hands on kaeya chest and tell him to stop
he immediately freezes, concern and guilt flooding his face
"Can I pull out?"
you nod and he backs away from your body, opting to sit back to give you some space
"Did it hurt? Did I do something wrong? Should I go get anything?"
he listens to you as you try to explain him how you felt
he goes getting a warm cloth to gently clean you up before embracing you in his arms
he feels really bad for not having noticed your discomfort sooner
you tell him that's its fine, you thought you were ready but maybe you were too nervous
you two keep talking about it for a while until you fall asleep
after that for a while he's a bit reluctant to try again because he doesn't want to hurt you
but when you tell him that you really want to take this step with him, he finally agrees
expect 3 hours of foreplay
♡Kaveh♡
now now
sweet kaveh loves to spoil you, taking you out to have dinner and go shopping
however his wallet does not enjoy it as much as he does
so you often have dates where you just go for a walk together or have a picnic
it's during one of those dates that he casually mentions the subject of sex
now, he doesn’t want to force you but he loves you so much and the idea of you two doing that together looks amazing to him
the conversation its not meant to push you, but rather to offer you an occasion to talk about it together and see if you feel the same about him
when you tell him you're ready (be it that same date or after years) he gets so excited
he can't believe you're going to share the magic moment of your first time with him of all people
he probably asks you if you two can go at your place since he doesn't want alhaitham around
once you two get down to business, he's the sweetest guy ever
he kisses every single inch of your body, basically worshipping you
makes sure to keep eye contact with you most of the time so he can notice if anything is wrong
after the foreplay, he lets you get on top of him, straddling his lap while his back is propped up by some pillows
he wants you to be the one in charge so you can choose the pace of events
the moment you lower yourself on him, he knows something is wrong
yes, he does feel a lot of pleasure from finally being inside of you, but he doesn't miss the face you make
when after a few seconds he sees tears pooling in your eyes he has the confirmation of his suspects
he immediately grabs your hips and pulls you up, making you sit on his thighs before comfortly rubbing your arms and shoulders
"What's wrong baby?"
he's so gentle with you, holding you close while you sniffle in his neck, hands resting on his chest
he strokes your hair and reassures you that you don't have to do anything if you're not ready, that he'd wait a thousand years for you, that he loves you as much as before, that sex is not the important thing in your relationship
he waits for you to calm down before asking you what exactly you think went wrong
if you tell him you want to try again he's completely fine with it, but he becomes even more attentive and gentle, making sure that this time you'll be able to enjoy it
297 notes · View notes
silverzoomies · 3 months
Note
Ok so I've been a fan of Evan since days of future past came out. Like, the day it came out. I saw the premier or whatever it's called in theaters so DUH I LOVE QUICKSILVER SO MUCH 😞😞 anyways I know you're not taking requests but like I'm a little bit chubby (this is relevant I swear) and I CANNOT stop thinking about Peter and reader! being in a serious long term relationship, but they haven't gone all the way yet. Like, heavy make out session? Yes! Peter getting painfully hard during said make out session? Check. Make out session turns into peters desperately grinding, letting out the neediest little whines. Absolutely. Him definitely busting in his pants at readers! breathless little moans? Every. Single. Time. Never all the way though. He desperately wants to bone but he's willing to wait as long as he wants to because he thinks reader! doesn't want to, but they're just as desperate as he is but scared of what he would think because they're chubby. During one of their heated.. laundry day inducing make out sessions one thing leads to another and reader! ends up telling Peter why they haven't wanted to go all the way, and Peter proves to them he doesn't think that [;)] and talks reader! through it the whole time.
YOU DONT HAVE TO ADD THIS TO YOUR REQUESTS OR TURN IT INTO A FIC IF YOU DONT WANT TO. I just had to share this with somebody and OBVIOUSLY because you're one of my favorite writers I had to come to you with this (hi I've sent u a lot of messages 🎀) and since you're another huge quickie fan I thought you'd enjoy this :3 SORRY IF THIS WAS SUPER LONG OR IF IT DIDNT MAKE SENSE I'm mad at typing sometimes smh
helllooooooo anon, my lovely !!! i love you so much !! forgive me, i haven't written in a while !! i tried my best to make somethin' out of this because it was such a cute idea !! i hope a headcanon list will suffice !! also, please don't ever apologize for sending me long asks. i'm not kidding when i say they make my day, i love them so much !!
Tumblr media
headcanons || peter maximoff x chubby!reader
Tumblr media Tumblr media
to preface, i think we should consider some key things about our speedy goofball
peter’s a mutant. he knows exactly what it feels like to be alienated for something he has no control over
second of all, the guy’s a little bit of a weirdo
i legitimately doubt he would judge, or think less of anyone for something as superficial as looks
seriously. If he vibes with you, and you’re patient enough with him - you’re sexy as hell
it’s as simple as that, sorry. just bein' honest
so what if you’re a little thicker? he can’t get enough of you
he’s so addicted to you, in fact, you’ve got him trippin’ a little bit
like, he’s kinda goin’ cuckoo
the two of you make out a lot. so much. it’s like you’re glued to one another. any free time you have together usually consists of hanging out, and making out. not that he’s complaining
it’s definitely awesome. and it feels totally great. he does this freaky thing with his tongue that makes you squirm under him every time 
and the way you whine into each smooch - oh, man - you have him longing to get even closer
make outs eventually turn to dry humping. it’s kind of humiliating the first few times...
...since the grinding always seems to end with him busting a load in his jeans. and he whimpers too much...jeez...
but you always praise him for it, which never fails to turn him on even more
things get so heated between the two of you, escalating so often - peter finds himself confused
like…why haven’t you let him…y’know…
once or twice, he hints he wants to go down on you. and there’s no way you misread his signals. he’s pretty blunt about his needs
but you’re always so reluctant. you feign ignorance, or try to distract him with more intense kisses and pretty moans
peter’s never been a patient guy. the fact that he’s willing to wait this long for you says a lot. like, shit…he must really really really like you
but even now…fuck…he’s so worked up. he’s getting a little too bored of being limited to smooching
like, c’mon…do you think he’s ugly or something?? does he smell?? what’s the deal??
he never considered you might be self conscious. his brain doesn’t really operate like that. he’s all impulsivity and living in the moment
in the midst of making out, his hands travel where they don’t usually dare to go. he takes confident chances, fondling your tits over your clothes. but just as things heat up, you redirect his attention again
his blood almost boils. he’s way too hard for this, aching to get closer, and you’re just…gah! why’re you holdin’ yourself back? 
at last, you confess…you’ve been self conscious the whole time
ah
why didn’t you just say somethin’ before? peter tries not to laugh at how silly you sound. obviously, he’s super attracted to you. why else would he spend all his free time with you, tryna get up close and personal?
as things finally move forward, he dials up the sweetness a few notches
and damn, the wait for this was more than worth the uptick in laundry days (thanks to one too many nuts busted in his boxers)
he covers every last inch of your gorgeous body in kisses, as you let him shed you of your clothes
his masculine hands are more gentle than you expect
unclothed together, he doesn’t hesitate to get as close as he possibly can
you’re soft and cozy, and his body is like a furnace
months of pent-up desire leave him so horny, he can’t hold back anymore
through it all, he’s quick to remind you how much of a fox you are. peter teases you with his tongue in ways you never imagined possible. before rocking your world, flowing with the motion of the ocean
and by that, i mean…you bone. balls deep. hellz to the yeah
embarrassingly enough, it ends just as soon as it starts. but as usual, he recovers fast. and his endless stamina means he’s willing to go at it for hours
which he does. until you’re so exhausted, your limbs are like limp noodles. whoops...sorry about that !!
say...uh...no chance you'd wanna go another round, is there?
peter hopes you’ll be more up front with him from now on. so he spends less time dreamin', and more time goin' at it 🤍
123 notes · View notes
javis-burner-phone · 2 months
Text
To Writers in the Pedro Pascal Fandom:
This fandom went full Chernobyl this summer. I need a hazmat suit to get through these tags. I recently saw an anon reach out to a fic writer here.
Tumblr media
The anon is right that there's a problem in the fandom space, but they're misplacing blame. I'm writing this post for the non-hateful writers that have tried to feel a part of the community, but ended up feeling left out. I'm posting this on a burner account for obvious reasons that you'll see below:
The hateful posts about "big writers" have absolutely disgusted me, but I can relate to the frustration that many fic writers are expressing. We see very fun and active areas of the fandom where writers are communal, hyping each other up, reblogging fics, but only within certain friend groups. Most of us writers don't have that. Instead this fandom sometimes feels like a desolate wasteland for many of us.
Here's where us writers need to place the blame:
Since the introduction of algorithms, there has been a cyclical effect: popular Tumblr posts are boosted due to everyone's default feed settings and posts from new, lesser known blogs are pushed down.
Over years, this has impacted fandom spaces in a sort of feedback loop. We're currently seeing the late stages of this. This effect pushes most fandom activity towards the already popular blogs by default. (Yes, Tumblr has always shown popular posts first, but algorithms, and the feedback loops they create, have made the effect stronger over the years.)
Is that the "big writers" faults? No. Are friend groups to blame? No. In fact, we should have more friend groups in this fandom. That's how fandoms used to be. There were dozens of overlapping friend groups that would have long reblog chains and mainly interact with each other. New people could find other new people pretty easily and make their own groups.
Now new people/smaller blogs are far less exposed to other new people/smaller blogs by default. *That* is the problem.
Eventually, I found my people. I feel a part of the community and you can too.
You just need to make 3 virgin sacrifices and find the lochness monster in order to do so. What I mean is, it takes a lot more effort than it used to. Be ready for that:
1. Sort by "Latest posts" when searching fandom hashtags. Imagine if Ao3 used an algorithm to show popular fics first instead of sorting by most recent fics. New writers would be screwed, right? That's what Tumblr does. Support posts that resonate with you, but have low engagement. Leave likes, comments, reblogs! Guess what happens when someone that feels isolated in this fandom gets a bunch of notes from you? They're gonna check out your blog. They may want to connect!
2. DM people. Is there a lesser known blogger whose posts you like? Ask to be mutuals! Start a conversation! If you can't be social it's gonna be near impossible to build community. Sorry if you have anxiety, but that's the truth. Warning: half the convos will fizzle out. Move on to the next person as soon as you sense this.
3. Don't try to connect with bigger blogs for friendship. I've tried and as long as you gush over them, they respond, but the interaction ends there. DMing them works, but the convos almost always feel one sided and fizzle out. I'm mutuals with some bigger bloggers, but I had to add their usernames to my filtered content list in account settings. This means they can see my stuff, but I can't see theirs. Seeing them have fun in their friend group just reminds me of my failed attempts to connect. Maybe filtering them isn't fair, but that's how I deal with my negative emotions. No, they are not rude for not befriending me. I don't feel entitled to friendship.
(edit: I got a weird anon about this part. It's more difficult to befriend people who already have close-knit connections here. It's not impossible, but I've had much better luck with fellow isolated fandom members. The secret ingredient is our shared desperation lol. Befriend whoever you want ❤️)
4. Join/start a small PPCU discord server. The big servers will just make you feel more isolated, but the intimate ones are way more communal and it's easier to make stronger connections there than on Tumblr. 
These tips are for people that actually want to find solutions instead of spreading hate and complaining.
I'm saying this as someone that averages 50 notes on most of my fics after a year in this fandom(edit: saw this poll and thought I'd clarify. I get 50 notes now, but for 8ish months I got 5 on a lucky day. This post is for people who still feel isolated because I know how it feels.) It takes way more effort than in the early 2010s to feel a part of a fandom, not because of cliques, but because of the feedback loops the algorithm creates. 
I understand the frustration, but I'm not going to spread vitriol just because the fandom ecosystem went to shit. 
42 notes · View notes
elliespassagerprincess · 11 months
Note
ultraviolence by Lana del Rey with toxic/mean/abusive!ellie who hurts reader x painslut reader who kinda loves it
Ultraviolence - (ellie williams x reader)
hi anon! I'm sorry this took so long, its been a while since I've written something like this, so it took me a while to get into that mindset. I hope you enjoy<3
Tumblr media
This story is based off the song, Ultraviolence by the queen Lana Del Ray, if you can please listen to the song as you're reading:)
Pairing: ellie x fem!reader
requests are always open, feel free to leave one:)
Warnings: toxic relationships, manipulation, cheating, reader is toxic
Summary: In which she became the person, you've always wanted
Authors note: wheeeew its been a while since I've written a fic that wasn't hcs, but I'm glad to be back!
He used to call me DN
That stood for deadly nightshade
'Cause I was filled with poison
But blessed with beauty and rage
Jim told me that
He hit me and it felt like a kiss
Jim brought me back
Reminded me of when we were kids
there was always something about Ellie.
You weren't sure if it was her dorky personality, or how she would apologize to table if she accidentally walked into it.
There was something about this girl.
And ever since you were a little girl, you knew you knw she was special. You felt like she was holding back. There was another side, you wanted to see.
You were both 7. You remembered watching Ellie, better known as four eyes because she wore massive glasses, sit alone once again. You remembered walking up to her, and asking her to play tag with you.
You still remembered the smile that spread across her face, because finally someone wanted to play with her. And since then Ellie has just always been there.
The two of you became friends. You aren't sure how, but she was always there.
You were Ellie's everything, because you were there for her during her loneliest years.
You knew how much you meant to her. You knew how much she loved you, and you took advantage of that.
Ellie's innocence and purity was something that intrigued you. You truly thought she was odd. No matter how old the two of you were, you always saw her as four eyes.
Nothing more than that. There was no romantic feelings from your side.
Ellie was everything you weren't.
She was sweet, kind, loveable.
But you were sick. A sick twisted individual who took advantage, of someone like Ellie.
But who could blame you?
Ellie was attractive, strong, financially stable, and well you were someone who saw the opportunity.
So it was actually Ellies fault.
She should've not trusted you so easily. She should've not let you in. Ellie brought this upon herself.
With his ultraviolence
Ultraviolence
Ultraviolence
Ultraviolence
I can hear sirens, sirens
He hit me and it felt like a kiss
I can hear violins, violins
Give me all of that ultraviolence
you didn't know when it all started.
You weren't sure when you developed this "kink".
Was this a disease? Or were you just fucking weird?
In 11th grade you remember your teaching yelling at you for failing a another test. You were called "pathetic", a "failure".
Most people would cry due to humiliation, but you couldn't help but feel your thighs clench together.
You thought you were weird. This was fucking sick honestly.
You went out of your way to make people mad, so that they would yell at you. To degrade you to an extent.
god you loved it.
Ellie had asked you to be her girlfriend when the two of you were 18. You took pity on her.
She was so soft. So naïve.
Ellie had no place being with someone like you. Someone who craves to be hurt. You were a painslut and Ellie, poor Ellie wasn't. She wouldn't be able to do that to you.
You were trapped in a relationship, where it was healthy. It felt safe. You enjoyed it sometimes, but there was one thing your heart craved. And maybe the thing Ellie was holding back was it.
You wanted to leave Ellie, until that one night.
The two of you were at a party, and Ellie was drunk out of her mind. You don't even know what she saw, or who said what but she was really fucking mad.
"You're fucking cheating on me bitch" Ellie slurred as she pointed her finger at you. You licked your lips at the insult, at the aggression, she spoke.
Focus.
"Ellie you're drunk, i didn't do anything"
"give me your phone"
"Ellie-"
"I'm not asking again" she yelled.
Fuck yes. This is what you want.
You handed her the phone, and you watched as she searched and she found nothing. She threw your phone across the room, you flinched slightly.
god she's so hot.
Ellie got up and grabbed your arm, bringing you close to her face, you smelt the alcohol in her breath.
She looked at you with dark eyes, before uttering "Don't ever think of cheating on me" she let go of your arm.
She grabbed you and it felt like a kiss.
When Ellie woke up the next morning, she couldn't remember a thing.
She was back to being herself. You wanted her back. You needed her again.
You realized, she was drunk. You couldn't keep her under the influence forever, just because you liked that version of her.
After that night you knew she was hiding a part of herself from you.
Drunk words are sober thoughts they say.
So maybe deep down she was actually toxic. Maybe she was the person you craved.
All you had to do was to figure out, how to get through to her.
He used to call me poison
Like I was poison ivy
I could've died right then
'Cause he was right beside me
Jim raised me up
He hurt me but it felt like true love
Jim taught me that
Loving him was never enough
you were like poison.
Destroying anything in your path. Infecting those with your poison.
After that night you realized Ellie's biggest insecurity was that you would leave her. And you used it to your advantage.
Of course you had to, how else would've you got what you wanted?
You would flirt with other people in front of her. You would talk to other girls, send them pictures. You did whatever it took. You were practically cheating on her.
You knew she would never leave you.
And you watched as Ellie slowly disintegrate into madness.
There was no more happy, go lucky Ellie. There was no more smiles. No more care free days.
Ellie lived in fear. You were out of her league. She knew she was going to lose you.
If you were by her side and Ellie could die peacefully. You taught her how to love and how to be a better person.
If you left what would become of her?
Everything went down hill. Ellie started taking your phone. She became more aggressive with her words.
The lovely girl you once knew was gone. You killed the old her. And the person she was becoming was someone you've always dreamed of.
You had a curfew, and when you came home late it would end in her insulting you.
"Who else are you fucking huh? You're practically showing the world your whole body"
you lived a life of fights, make up sex, and jealousy.
You loved every fucking second of it.
She was hurting you and it felt like true love.
I love you the first time
I love you the last time
Yo soy la princesa, comprende mis white lines
'Cause I'm your jazz singer
And you're my cult leader
I love you forever
I love you forever
Ellie loved you, and you loved her.
You love her today, tomorrow and for the rest of your lives.
Ellie became the women you would choose in every lifetime.
Ellie was your leader. The person you would finally follow.
You love Ellie. You'd love her for eternity.
It was truly a sickining thing, you were doing to the poor girl, but God you were selfish. You wanted it all. All the insults, pain, negativity. You craved it.
For the sake of this relationship, you hoped Ellie stayed as toxic as she did.
165 notes · View notes
itsaspectrumcomic · 8 days
Note
On anon bc identifiable info - advice/thoughts? - This is really long, I'm sorry D: I'm a rambler and all the info is important (to me)
I've always had problems with stuff (according to my mom, "things have always been harder for [me] than everyone else") like I'm always the last one out the door, I lose things a lot (like hats and pencils and water bottles) because I set them down and don't realize, I have a lot of trouble doing textbook homework/notes bc I have trouble focusing
And I have a lot of trouble with social stuff, I never have a lot of friends, I can't keep friends for more than like four years, I feel really disconnected with people and people generally initially like me but like me significantly less after interacting with me a bit
I read a lot, and when I was a kid I would lose all sense of reality outside the book until someone touched me or I finished the book, but I've had a harder and harder time reading anything but fanfic as I've gotten older, and I have a lot of trouble reading very technical/instructions/nonfiction stuff
I have pretty bad insomnia, and spent ~2 years when I was 10-13 ish sleeping ~3-4 hrs/night weekdays and ~12 hrs/night weekends, I have a really hard time getting to sleep specifically - and (tmi maybe tw eating) I've had chronic minor eating issues and constipation (chronic minor dehydration, losing ~ 10 lbs over summers from not eating, etc. like I'm not dying or anything but this will probably eventually cause wear damage)
---
But I'm also a very good student, very smart, generally very good at what I choose to do, I just became a National Merit semifinalist, like, I'm doing "fine". I'm not dying, I'm not failing classes or anything, I've struggled since second semester year before last with getting things done, but I have like a 3.7 gpa rn (I could have a 4 if I tried harder (while I am capable of trying harder, it would destroy me))
I was in Gifted + Talented in elementary school, I'm an honors/ap student (my G+T teacher told my mom that the "gifted" basically means "neurodivergent")
---
I didn't get help for anything until last year, when I kinda fell off (as much as you can fall off while getting a 3.7 gpa ig) and got assessed for insomnia, which I got help with pretty easily (apart for waiting times) which was amazing. Almost went too well iykwim
And I was looking into why I was having such a hard time with everything (social, focus, sleep, schoolwork,etc) and I resonated a lot with autism and some of the feeling very disconnected from society/ other people but I was like eeeh, I'm a teen and idk I'm not, like, having it that bad, so I was looking into more quantitative solid stuff and I took the AQ + CAT-Q + stuff which still have very subjective questions but I tried to be honest and I got 32 (AQ) and 139 (CAT-Q) and 157 (RAADS-R) but like idk I could be biased or misunderstanding or idk
I mentioned feeling like I had more, underlying issues to the doctor I'm seeing for the insomnia and she was basically like "I work with autistic kids - you're not autistic" which like on one hand, you're the expert and I've only really interacted with the internet so idk but on the other, you've spent all of two hours with me, mostly asking me direct questions about my sleep or talking to my mother, like, ofc you haven't seen anything of me. Did I make too much fake eye contact with you?? (BTW if you dislike eye contact for any reason, which I always have, look at noses (my mother taught me this one) or hair (my personal fav) bc it looks like you're looking at the face, but you aren't!!)
this is getting very long winded, I'm sorry if you choose to read all this but thank you it means a lot to me to get someone who knows something's thoughts on this
So I was like "I am having other problems" and she was like "I suspect you may have inattentive type adhd" and I was initially like what?? but I'm not hyperactive. Can't have adhd. What. But I've been kinda thinking about it and lurking at the edge of adhd communities and googling stuff (google is not helpful) and maybe? idk
SO to get to my point/question
I'm very smart. (not tryna be conceited it's just I am) I'm not currently *dying* struggling, though I am having trouble staying on top of classwork
I'm a girl
I live in the USA
I'm pretty good at acting normal, I have a couple friends (one has diagnosed adhd, one has diagnosed autism, one I'm not sure, one I think? could be neurotypical? but she's also like really not idk) (I (only?) have four friends (which is a lot, for me))
I don't know if I'm "adhd enough" (or "autistic enough" if I was right initially) ((or both idk)) to get a diagnosis. I have hypermobility that causes issues with my joints and has led to me not exercising enough and having to quit violin but I'm not hypermobile "enough" to get a diagnosis or help for it (which sucks because it's literally affecting my quality of life, like, I could be an amazing musician if I didn't have this. D: )
If I try, will I get a diagnosis, or will I be "adhd, but not enough"? Should I continue to spend (my parent's insurance) money on this if it probably won't go anywhere? I'm currently 17, starting my senior year of high school. Will things get disrupted in transition to college? If I go abroad for college?
Also, will I crash and burn in college without my mother's considerable support? (tw eating again) I have always had a really hard time getting and preparing and eating food, and without her/structure idk how much I will eat. I loose weight over the summer bc we don't eat as a family much. when I'm on my own, will I struggle even more? Especially trying to juggle food and school and living independently? What about after college? My uncle was fine until he graduated college and now he's alone and a misogynist and mormon and lives with my grandma and seems kinda really miserable except way more hate-filled - am I doomed to the same path?
anyways this is really dark I'm sorry
specific questions for you are:
should I pursue ADHD diagnosis? Autism?
is there anything specific I should mention/not mention/think about?
is there anything you think I (+ people in similar situations) should research, any specific sites/books/communities you think would be valuable?
would therapy help with anything? social, focus, etc. (I have not had a chance, and I have been noncommittal at mentions bc. i strongly dislike people, and talking to people, and emotions ): )
are things in general going to get better, or worse? please be honest, not reassuring
If you decide to answer this, partially or completely, thank you, it means a lot to me to get someone else's thoughts on this, if not, I completely understand, either way, I hope you have a good day :)
Hello! A lot of what you wrote feels very familiar to my own experience - I was also considered a good student but found things increasingly difficult to cope with, struggled socially, lost and forgot stuff, couldn't focus etc. You're definitely not alone in feeling this way!
You are not doomed and you are not your uncle. Things can always get better, even when you're at your lowest. You never know what will happen next - you could make a friend, you could discover a new passion, you could be offered a cool opportunity, you could get the chance to pet a really friendly dog. Life isn't a straight line - you might be struggling for a bit, and then some nice stuff will happen, and then you might go through a rough patch again, but then things will improve again and you might feel better than you did before.
For eating when you go to college - identify the foods you generally find easy to make and eat and make sure you have a supply avaliable for when you're struggling. For me, that's pasta (you can get dry pasta which lasts ages in the cupboard, but you could also try fresh ravioli which has stuff inside like spinach or tomato or cheese so it's a bit more varied), crackers, bananas, and breakfast bars. That way if you can't make a proper meal, you at least eat something. Also try to carry a water bottle with you everywhere (if you struggle to drink water you could try flavoured water or juice.) If you forget about needing to eat you could set alarms to remind yourself.
Side note: did you know that hypermobility and autism very often occur together?
Onto your questions:
should I pursue ADHD diagnosis? Autism?
It's definitely worth looking into - I can't guarantee you'll get a diagnosis because it really depends on the person/people assessing you and some are more biased than others (if you're able to choose, look for people who say they specialise in diagnosing women and girls or have positive reviews from people in that demographic). Personally I found it helped a lot with getting accommodations, people understanding me, and understanding myself (even before the diagnosis was official). I will say it's usually quite a long process so be prepared for that.
Btw, you can definitely have ADHD without being hyperactive - that's the inattentive type which is more about trouble focusing.
is there anything specific I should mention/not mention/think about?
Honestly a lot of what you've written will probably come up in an assessment! I had to fill out a form with info about my experiences as a child and the traits I have now, as did my mum. If you're high masking (basically when you try to act 'normal' and hide your neurodivergent traits) do your best not to mask so the assessor gets to see you as you really are.
is there anything you think I (+ people in similar situations) should research, any specific sites/books/communities you think would be valuable?
Untypical by Pete Wharmby is an excellent book if you want to learn more about autistic experiences. The author is autistic himself and has an engaging writing style.
How to ADHD is a YouTube channel that focuses on coping techiques for ADHD and is informative as well.
I've found the autism communities on Reddit to be welcoming and supportive - you might like r/AutismInWomen which is inclusive and accepting of self diagnosis and those who are questioning.
You could also follow some of these people on instagram:
morgaanfoley - posts about her experiences as an autistic person
_ellawillis - posts about autism and ADHD and their daily life
candy.courn - posts about autism and disability as well as how that intersects with their experience as an asian person. Also has the most beautifully pink house
colourblind_zebra - makes cute and colourful art about chronic illness and neurodiversity
elliemidds - posts about autism and adhd and runs a community called We are Unmasked (weareumasked on insta)
itsemilykaty - posts about autism, mental health, and her book Girl Unmasked (which I haven't read yet but is supposed to be very good!)
Side note: I also have an instagram if you'd like to follow :) I'm itsaspectrumcomic there as well!
would therapy help with anything? social, focus, etc. (I have not had a chance, and I have been noncommittal at mentions bc. i strongly dislike people, and talking to people, and emotions ): )
Therapy can help a lot - with the right therapist! Look for people who specialise in neurodivergence, particularly in girls. The best ones are on the spectrum themselves :) It's OK if you don't click with the first one you try. You can 'shop around' until you find someone you're comfortable with (which I know can be exhausting but it's worth it when you find the right one).
are things in general going to get better, or worse? please be honest, not reassuring
Like I said before, things will get better, and then you might struggle for a while, and then things get better again. It comes in waves, at least for me. I know when you're having a hard time it can feel like it's going to last forever, but I promise it won't. There are always bright spots.
31 notes · View notes
raffe156 · 1 year
Text
Late Night sparring
Tumblr media
Pairing - Price X Tank X Ghost
Summary - A Late Night sparring sessions turns into something more.
Warnings - Smut (18+) Voyeurism, Language, Age gap Price (39) Tank (25) Ghost (36) SoftDom!Price, public sex, praise kink, fingering, Oral (F receiving) P in V, unsafe sex, Ghost being a little simp for Tank, Price likes to watch...
AN- I'm so sorry this took so long! not 100% happy with it, but we'll see what you guys think.
It's kind of filth, I re wrote this about 4 times so please please please let me know what you guys think either by comments, anon asks or however you feel comfortable! I've been in such a writers block headspace that getting this out felt like such an accomplishment haha!
Also enjoy another one of the commissions I had done by the amazingly talented @hffhifjou x
@deadbranch @mildlyhopeless @fanficandartgal @shuttlelauncher81 @a-littlebirdie @soapyghost @boomtowngirl @mostannoyingbillioner @brewed-pangolin @chb-7 @sarcastic-raptor163 @tapioca-marzipan
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Call of duty characters, Only Tank
“Hands where I can see them Riley!” Price shouted from the side lines. Ghost currently had you pinned underneath him both arms locked behind your back pressed to his stomach, face pressed to the floor of the ring.
“Will one do?” Ghost waved his free hand at Price causing his weight to shift fully onto you. You could just make out Price giving him the finger, his brow furrowed.
“Off now…” He made his way over to the edge of the ring, but Ghost didn’t ease up. Instead he leaned down close, you could feel the warmth of his breath on your cheek.
“You don’t want me to get up do you?…I think you like being under me…” it was just quiet enough for Price to miss but he didn’t miss the flush that spread across your face.
“UP NOW!” It was more of a warning that a request now. Ghost made a slow effort to get up, his hands being the last to leave your wrists. They felt bruised but it was a nice ache. You would never admit it to him, but he was right.
‘I think I’m done for tonight cap…I need a shower” You rolled over onto your back flat out. You didn’t even need to look at Price to know that wasn’t happening.
“Ill be the judge of that…I’ll take over the session..” Price shrugged his shoulders, stretched his arms and entered the ring. Ghost shot him a look.
“Maybe we should just hit the showers eh Cap?” Ghost rubbed your calf, you both knew exactly what he meant and the mental image caused your mind to wander…would all 3 of you even fit? The cubicles were small…you and Price just about fit…would Ghost keep his mask on? Did Ghost wear his mask in the shower? You hadn’t realised Price was talking to you till he snapped his fingers in front of your face.
“I said are you ready kid?” Price cocked his eyebrow at you.
“what? Really? I’ve just had my arse handed to me by him…I don’t need another beat down from you! Can we just all go take a shower?” You sat up, looking up at Price from under your lashes…hopefully the little lost lamb look would soften his big bad wolf stance…it didn’t. The pathetic attempt made Ghost scoff…but you and he knew it would have worked on him. Price was a tougher nut to crack. You stood up.
“If that’s what you want then you better get to work…because we aren’t stopping till you get me pinned to the ground” before you could protest Price was on you like a rash, in two moves he had disabled you completely. Both arms behind your back body bent forward. If you weren’t so pissed off this would have been hot, but you knew he meant business an knew he wasn’t joking about not stopping till you pinned him.
*******
It had been about an hour your breath was ragged, the sweat dripping from you, your body ached from being slammed to the ground numerous times by Price his full weight resting on you each time, he didn’t hold back.
Every sly attempt to seduce him or touch him failed and almost always ended up with you on your arse or in a headlock tapping his arm.
“Can’t flirt your way out of a headlock love!”
“How long can you keep this up? Really?” You crouched taking in the few minutes rest. You watched Price from the corner of your eye he circled you like a predator his breathing was deep, though he didn’t look half as worn out as you did, if anything he looked virile, rejuvenated what was he getting out of this? He crouched in front of you a smirk planted across his face.
“You know me Tank I can go all night…”
His smug words had you grabbing at his arm to attempt a throw but instead he pulled you back into him your back pressed to his chest your own arm locking you in place.
“Nearly…” He chuckled in your ear, he knew it enraged you. He knew you were getting ratty now like a toddler that had been deprived of an afternoon nap. You bucked back into him trying and failing to throw him over. His laugh only get louder.
Ghost was silent in the corner, he had watching in awe as the two of you had fought. Watched as your bodies collided and crashed into one another. He watched as if in slow motion you bare and snap your teeth at Price who only returned the aggression in the form or a smirk. It was like a dance and Ghost wanted to cut in.
“Think she’s had enough Price…she’s getting snappy now…literally” Just as he said it you had sunk your teeth into Prices forearm. He kicked your leg out from under you causing you to drop down releasing his arm from your bite, Price went down with you repositioning himself so your arms were completely locked behind you.
“Im sick of this shit…” you were struggling against him so much you hadn’t even clocked Ghost now crouched in front of you. His ski mask was up.
He leaned in his lips grazing yours. It took you by surprise but you welcomed him in, Price watched as you let Ghost slip his tongue into your mouth. He felt you ease up but he didn’t release his hold. He liked the control. He pulled you back.
“Tell me what you want Tank?” Price was in your ear. You let out a sigh.
“Ghost…” you knew the answer was a risky one, but he had wound you up. Ghost looked at you a little smirk on his face, but he knew Price was in charge here still.
“Is that right?…fair enough…” Price slowly released his hold. You looked back…there must be a catch surely it wasn’t that easy? But not to look a gift horse in the mouth as soon as your hands were free they flew up to Ghost face, your thumbs running just under the edge of his mask testing your limits, his hands came up to rest on yours.
“Easy tiger haha” Ghost watched Price from the corner of his eye, what was he up to? Price jumped out of the ring and made his way over to his jacket pulling out a cigar and lighter. Really?
Ghost turned his attention back to you, he was going to make the most of this “free rein”. He gently pushed you back so you were lay flat pulling your shorts off in one quick move. Your underwear was soaked. It made him feral the thought of you getting off on being thrown around and pinned by you Captain and Lieutenant.
He lowered his head his mouth just a few inches from your centre making you scream internally, his hand kneading your inner thigh he lifted his head slightly to plant little kisses close to where his hand rested in between each kiss you could feel the faint nip of his teeth, as he got close he used his other hand to gently pull your underwear to the side. His warm breath caused your nerves to spark and fizz. The sight of you laid open for him made his mouth water like a sour sweet had been placed under his tongue. He noticed your hand fidgeting in anticipation so decide to lace his fingers with yours, his much larger hand nearly swallowing yours as he did he slowly licked a stripe up your core, savouring your taste, smoked honey mixed with salt…it drove him insane as he licked and sucked at your slit you could feel your eyes rolling to the back of your head, as he pushed two fingers inside, you felt your walls clamping down on him and then came the familiar swell in your stomach. You turned your head locking eyes with Price his face mostly distorted by a cloud of thick cigar smoke, but you could just make out his sharp blue eyes.
The thought of Price watching you pushed you over the edge, he didn’t break eye contact as you came.
“Atta girl” the sound of praise from Price flooded your system just like his smoke filled your lungs. Even without touching you he could still cause a stir inside. He still had control. Ghost knew this but he didn’t care, he had you laid out, open for him to explore even if he had to share your attention.
He made his way up your body, taking you in as he did. He almost completely covered you, his body a shield. He had you caged underneath him his arm blocking you from Price’s view. He could see you looking for your Captain, but right now here you were under your Lieutenants command.
“Eyes on me…” he whispered as he undid his pants, pulling his cock out the weight of it resting on your opening. You were pinned under him but you watched his eyes as you managed to roll your hips up into him causing the head of his cock to slip over your clit.
“Fucking HELL” his eyes rolled back as you rolled your hips again for another pass. Ghost couldn’t take it anymore he hooked your legs over his thighs pulling you up as he did supporting you from underneath, you instinctively wrapped your arms around his neck. He fisted his cock angling it at your core you were warm an inviting. You looked at him your eyes glossy an wet, you wanted him inside you here an now and you wanted Price to watch him have you. You both looked down to where you were almost joined.
“Ready?” Ghost drew back he knew from last time he had to take it slow allow you to adjust around him.
“Mhmm” you head felt foggy like the smoke from Prices cigar had clouded it. But the feeling of Ghost entering you cleared the fog like a wave, washing it away suddenly all your senses were filled with Ghost, his body heat, his smell cigarettes and mint all filled you up the feeling of his rough hands gripping your arse as you rocked back down onto him. You held on tight pushing yourself into him chest to chest. He could feel your heart racing he wanted you closer needed you closer if he could he would open his chest an keep you there.
His thrusts became rampant, rutting up into you the sounds echoing across the gym. Ghost could feel himself getting close an could tell you were as well by how your walls clung to him reluctant to let him pull out even an inch.
“Cum for me…” he lowered you back down onto the floor of the ring his pace only slowing slightly your legs still wrapped around his waist.
You felt the spring in your stomach coil up tight as Ghost buried his face in your neck.
“Are you gonna be a good girl an cum for your Lieutenant” he growled through gritted teeth into your neck. You turned you head to allow him to get deeper into your clavicle. As your eyes fluttered open you noticed Price was sat closer to the ring slouched and legs spread, cigar still in his mouth puffing away. A smirk on his face was he enjoying this? He knew you were looking for him, knew you needed to know he was watching you. He knew you needed his nod of approval to say you could be a good girl an cum and there it was subtle but it was there. You allowed yourself to fully be devoured by Ghost and swallowed whole, you took all of him in every nerve ending was alight and screaming his name an he knew it he could feel the difference in you, Ghost wanted to give you all of him willed you to take it he only asked for a fraction of you in return as he knew he could never have all of you but for a split second as he glanced down at you he felt like he did.
You both came at the same time you could feel the hot ropes of cum filling you as your bodies eased up. Your panting an moans filled the gym hall. Both trying to catch your breath a haze of lust and body heat surrounded you. Then out of the haze came Prices voice
“Hurry up an hit the showers, you still haven’t pinned me yet Tank…so don’t be thinking we are done for the night…”
376 notes · View notes
thelaughtercafe · 6 months
Note
Hello! I'm very happy to found your blog... since you said you accept darker content request... would you mind doing something related to "bullying" with lee kageyama and ler oikawa? I feel like only Oikawa strong enough to bully Kageyama, because Kageyama itself was already intimidating in my opinion... Thank you so much in advance! P.S. please avoid foot tickles hehe
Tea Type: Black Coffee
Potential Triggers: Bullying using tickling, I'm gonna give a non-con warning for tickling too, some trauma responses and panicked behavior
Pairing: Oikawa/Kageyama
Length: 1.6k+
Summary: A chance meeting leads to familiar feelings and anxieties thought long forgotten.
A/N: Hope you enjoy this anon, apologies for the wait! I was a little unsure just how dark I wanted to go with it so it took a bit to finish it but I hope you enjoy the final product! Definitely let me know whatcha think <3
Chance Meetings*
Tumblr media
“Is that who I think it is?”
Kageyama froze in place; a long forgotten feeling of dread settling in his stomach. He felt his heart beat faster, heat flooding his cheeks as his eyes darted around, looking for an escape. He knew he shouldn't have gone to the sports store today. If he ran- he just knew he wouldn't get far. Not with him. 
A familiar arm slung around his shoulder and he whirled to lock eyes, still frozen. 
Oikawa laughed, eyes glittering in amusement at Kageyama's shock. 
“I should've known if I'd catch you anywhere it'd be here; heard you've been doing pretty well for yourself nowadays. Your team is pretty good.”
Kageyama nodded stiffly, wanting nothing more than for this to be over with. Maybe if he just told him what he wanted to hear he'd leave without a fuss. He cleared his throat and shrugged off Oikawa's arm, turning his face away as he headed towards the doors, trying to make it look casual. He tried to ignore the lump in his throat as he followed just behind him, a cheerful grin on his face. 
“Yeah, yours too. You're just as strategic as ever.”
“What can I say? Got to keep my opponents guessing~”
He tried not to remember his old encouragement methods, but failed, feeling more heat in his cheeks as he reached his car. He felt the weight in his chest begin to subside, a bit of genuine happiness making a small smile spread across his lips. 
“Sorry to cut the conversation short, I've actually got to meal prep for this week, but it was great seeing you again.”
Kageyama turned to try and open his car door but inhaled as Oikawa leaned over him, one arm over his head, subtly keeping the door closed and drawing his attention back his way. He tried not to flinch at the way Oikawa's once playful, light expression darkened, but only in his eyes. His voice and words remained bubbly. They were still in public after all. 
“Aww but I haven’t seen you in soo long Tobio~ I can help you! You don't mind me tagging along do you?”
Kageyama debated his options, nibbling his bottom lip and came to a decision. There really wasn't one. Oikawa was nothing if not resourceful, and stubborn. If he didn't agree now? He'd just get it worse later. Oikawa had never had any issues biding his time. He'd once said it gave him time to think up more “fun ideas”. For him, of course. 
So, Kageyama nodded with a sigh. 
“Sure, fine, whatever.”
He rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably and Oikawa giggled, his eyes lighting right back up at his agreeance and poked Kageyama's unguarded midsection, making him jump and cover his stomach. 
“Aww c'mon cheer up Tobio! We'll have so much fun!”
Kageyama grumbled and got into his car as Oikawa moved over to his own after a cheerful wave to follow him home. 
Once there, things were nicer than Kageyama expected honestly. He helped him meal prep, talking animatedly about setting strategies that he too couldn't help but get passionate about, and their favorite college teams. Kageyama was finally relaxing from being jumpy at Oikawa’s surprise attack earlier when he struck while they were relaxing in the living room. 
Kageyama had sat on the other end of the couch when Oikawa eagerly bounded forward and straddled his waist. Kageyama grappled with him but quickly found himself overpowered, with his hands pinned under Oikawa's legs as he straddled his waist.
Oikawa laughed gleefully and cooed at him as Kageyama glowered up at him. 
“Aww, you didn't really think I'd letcha off the hook, how did ya? What kind of friend would I be if I didn't test your endurance? You know; for old times sake~”
Kageyama's heart beat wildly and he growled, trying to make himself more threatening. It worked on everyone in Karasuno, and even with his current team. Most normal people would've cowered, and apologized- but Oikawa was the one bastard that had never worked on. Not ever since he found out this stupid, downright humiliating weakness of his. 
It was kind of hard to be taken seriously when you were laughing your head off, and squealing like a child. 
“Now where to start, where to start? Any volunteers?”
Oikawa sounded sadistic as ever, eyes scanning his body for the slightest movement now that they were alone and Kageyama discreetly tried to squirm. No dice. He was stuck. Unfortunately he bucked his hips in the process and Oikawa’s eyes lit up. 
“I never took you to be so eager Tobio~ But if you insist!” 
Kageyama threw his head back in mirth as Oikawa drilled his thumbs into his hipbones, making him really buck, for all the good it did him.  
“Hhehehehey! Cut it ohohout, get off mehehehe!” 
“Nah, you must be having fun. Look at that beaming smile you’ve got! So cute~”
Kageyama groaned in annoyance at that, feeling his blush darken. 
“Ugh! I am nhahahahat! I swear when you let me up you’re dehehehead!! You hehehear me!? Dead!”
Oikawa’s eyes sparkled with mirth as he jeered down at him, his fingers ruthlessly toying with his hips before one jumped to scribble at his tummy, his shirt having ridden up from his struggling.
“Oho? Still have it in you to threaten me? That’s not very sportsmanlike of you Tobio! Besides, we both know you’d never be able to overpower moi!”
Kageyama wished he had the strength to fight back, to prove him wrong but tickling had always made him helpless, unable to do anything but laugh. He’d tried to get him back later, give him a taste of his own medicine once, back in college. 
It hadn’t gone well- Iwaizumi had walked in and all chances had evaporated in front of his eyes. Two on one was hardly fair, but seeing the momentary panic in Oikawa’s eyes and the snort he’d let out had been worth it. At least till he had been wrecked to tears for the attempt. 
His struggling finally bore fruit as he bucked particularly aggressively when Oikawa moved suddenly from his hip to the bottom of his ribs, finally allowing one of his hands freedom. He grabbed his wrist, tugging the offending hand up and off of him, panting and glaring. It wasn’t very threatening apparently, as Oikawa merely giggled at him, the fingers spidering along his stomach pausing. He cocked his head at him, brown eyes glittering with amusement.
“Oho? I’m impressed Tobio! You’ve bulked up since our school days!”
The hand at his tummy jumped to his exposed underarm and Kageyama yelped, air leaving him in a rush. Now that’s he’d gotten one of his hands, he had some leverage and strength and knowing he didn’t have much time, he acted. He raised his knee so it was flush against his captor’s side and brought both their hands down against the couch to push off his tricep to turn. Oikawa wasn’t expecting his sudden movements, and tumbled to the ground beside the couch, freeing his other hand in the process. He quickly released Oikawa’s wrist and jolted up, and over him seeking refuge in his bedroom and slammed it behind him, locking it just as a body slammed against it, causing it to jump back in surprise. 
He panted, swallowing harshly, hands trembling as he tried to think rationally. Oikawa wouldn’t break his door down. That was too direct for a scheming bastard like him. His eyes scanned the room for his phone and he felt his blood turn to ice as he realized it wasn’t here. Shit. The banging stopped, and Oikawa’s too sweet voice came through. 
“Aw c’mon Tobio, we were just playing~ I guess you’re a tad more sensitive than I remember. Sorry if I pushed you too much; if you come out, I promise I’ll play nice~”
Kageyama snorted, glaring at the door. He felt bolder, now that he was safe from his old “friend”.
“I’m not the same naive college kid you tormented, just leave, alright? I’m not gonna fall for your sweet words anymore!”
There was stony silence and Kageyama immediately regretted his speaking out, but it was too late to take it back now. 
So instead, he listened, backing up to sit on his bed and try to process. He couldn’t believe he’d been so stupid. Why did he bring him here? Now he knew his address. Maybe…Maybe he really hadn’t changed that much after all. If he was honest with himself, he’d always known some part of him missed Oikawa. For all his faults, his lack of listening sometimes…those good moments were still good. Maybe he was over-reacting-
He shook his head, holding his head in his hands. He was doing it again. Falling back on old habits to cope with Oikawa being in his life. 
“Tobio, I’m going to head out now! I put your meals in the fridge. And…I’m sorry. Really.”
Kageyama looked at the door with wide eyes. Oikawa actually sounded…remorseful. He sounded serious. Still, he didn’t move until he heard his door slam, and even then he held his breath and put his ear to his door, listening for any sign of footsteps, just in case. He twisted the knob and then headed back to the living room, letting out a breath as he realized he was truly gone. 
Everything was cleaned up, his living room just as it was, as if he was never there to begin with. 
He jumped in place at a sound, and his eyes flew to his phone, making him sigh. Just a text message. Stupid body. Why was he still so on edge? 
He grabbed his phone and swiped it open.
His eyes widened and his grip tightened, his other hand moving to cover his mouth. 
An unknown number.
The message?
‘Let’s meet up again sometime Tobio~’
54 notes · View notes
aechii · 2 years
Note
Heyy, first of all I just wanna say I love your writing and I really really appreciate you writing for black readers 💖 I wanted to request a kylian story about reader meeting his family for the first time, maybe bonding with his mom and Ethan if thats possible 😊 (also are we getting a second part for good luck charm??)
₍⁠₍ ONE OF US ₎⁠₎
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
PAiRiNG ?! boyfriend!kylian x black!femreader
GENRE ?! romance, fluff (😞)
C/W ?! written in 3rd person since i can't write in 2nd person for shit, she/her pronouns used, kylian whines alot, ethan is too mature for his own good lool, KYLIAN ISN'T DRIVING !!!
A/N ?! i luvvvv this request :) im glad you appreciate my works, it means a lot to me since i really want to make my black readers feel included <3
tried to make it not too fluffy (😞) but im sorry if i failed. part 2 of 'good luck charm' will be the next fic released after this so stay tuned for that (hopefully before the end of this week). anyways, hope i did ur request justice, anon 🖤
~°~
one and a half hours on road, and the ending of the everlasting queue of cars and headlights seemed out of sight. a traffic light suspended from the sky, like a descending black orb, and [y/n] tilted her head as she leaned forward to observe it. sighed, resting back as the lowness of her car's hood rendered her efforts futile, and instead, relied on the agonising snail-speed of the moving cars ahead.
"traffic's heavy today."
kylian responded with a quiet hum, tapping her thigh to the beat of the playing song, "yeah, bad day to go out but my mum's expecting you."
fear hovered just beneath her skin and kylian noticed the tremble of her hands. they gripped the steering wheel, as if to strangle it dead, sure that the grooves of the grips had indented into her palms. he gave a reassuring squeeze to her leg, then stretched forward to peck her cheek.
"you'll be alright, they'll love you."
her eyebrows remained crinkled, "are you sure?"
kylian gave an affirmative nod, "of course— honestly they'll love anybody who isn't me."
she knew his words were a tad bit hyperbolic, but it made her laugh anyways.
"really?"
"yeah. their dear kylian can be a handful sometimes."
[y/n] was quick to nod at that, "you're not wrong there."
in any other instance, kylian would find fault in her words and be haste to correct her, whining. yet, he watched how the knots of her fingers grew loose and how her shoulders untensed and settled with ease, and bit his tongue.
silence dallied in the car, save kylian's hums of every song that cried from the radio. the congestion had lightened and they both rolled forward a couple of feet per minute.
"quick warning though, ethan is most likely to drag you to play fifa with him. don't be scared to say no," kylian rolled his eyes after; she found their bond way too endearing and wholesome for her heart to take.
"says that he needs to add to his fifa kill count, and literally verses anybody he can," he proceeded. [y/n] would think he meant his irritation if she didn't peak the slight grin that ghosted his lips. he could never dislike the boy, of course.
"i see where he gets his competitiveness from," she joked, surging the car forward as the light turned green. the motorway is long left behind, and the distant city blended and smothered into the view before them.
"are you one of his kill counts?"
kylian kissed his teeth, and it triggered a hearty laugh from the girl beside him, "that's not even the point. i've demanded rematches and he still refuses to."
"babe, i think it's a sign that you should suck it up and accept that he's better than you at fifa."
"in your dreams," arms were crossed and he ignored her grin, looking out the window, "i'm forcing him to play today."
the gps ordered her to take a left, and she swiftly took the sharp corner, bustling streets dwindling behind them as they entered a quieter road.
"i will be supporting you— although i can't guarantee that i will for all of the games you play."
"so- what? you'll be rooting for ethan?" his words left his mouth as if they were bitter and salty on his tongue.
"mhm."
she only said that to rile up the man, finding humour in his disdain. in kylian's eyes, [y/n] was his, and only his, hype woman.
"traitor."
"love you too."
they fell into tranquil muteness as the sight of kylian's childhood house is unveiled by the skyscraping evergreen trees that seemed to be a habitual plant around this side of paris. it's not entirely big, but large enough that, from the outside, it was obvious that it situated two floors. gated and neatly groomed grass carpeted the front lawn, bright green and dotted with white. daisies, she predicted.
the car undulated to a halt, and [y/n] released a sigh.
"we're here... finally."
kylian shifted in his seat, facing his girlfriend, "yeah, we are." reached to scoop her hands in his, "and as i said, you have nothing to be scared about. i love you, hm? even if they don't like you, which i highly doubt will happen, it won't change a thing, okay?"
nodded and tilted forward to kiss her boyfriend. kylian's hand rested gently upon her cheek as he deepened it, lips tenderly harsh as he attempted to portray his words into action, too. a ping from his phone caused them to break contact, turning it on as he read the text from the notification bar.
mama ❤️ i see a car outside. stopping hogging the poor girl and come inside, it's too hot.
"who is it?" [y/n] asked.
kylian showed her the text and she softly chuckled as she read it, "you heard her. let's go."
they depart, not before kylian gave her hand a reassuring peck, and they amble to the front door.
kylian looked at her, finger at the ready to poke the doorbell, "ready?"
"i think so, yeah."
+_-
greeted with a warm, encompassing hug, [y/n] was pulled inside, her boyfriend complaining behind her as he was left behind.
"okay, forget your own son then," he gruntled, closing the door as the warm air from outside began to mesh with the cold one inside.
fayza, his mother, kissed her teeth. undeniably kylian's mother.
"as if i don't see you more than i want to."
an arm circled [y/n]'s waist, head tucking itself into her neck as lips muttered complaints into her skin. she patted his hand in faux sympathy.
they're escorted to the back garden, filled to them brim with kids no taller than her waist, and chattering adults. it was welcoming chaos, one that made her feel settled and content because everyone was happy, doing they're own thing as they gathered as one family.
and now, she was to be one of them.
broken out of her reverie, fayza's voice cut through the cacophony, and all heads turned toward their direction.
"everyone, meet [y/n], kylian's girlfriend. make her feel comfortable and at home for me," her face was illuminated with a smile.
a little voice, she presumed was of one of kylian's nieces, sounded from just beside them.
"she's very pretty!"
[y/n]'s heart swelled, and she untangled herself from her boyfriend's hold, crouching down in front of the infant, "thank you, love. what's your name?"
she reponded, full of eagerness, "marie!"
[y/n] chuckled, "you have a very pretty name, don't you?"
the toddler nodded, as she signalled for [y/n] to pick her up. arms wrapped around the small girl securely, she stood up, swirling the girl around as she giggled loudly, then began to ask her questions about her and kylian's relationship. her curiosity was overwhelmingly adorable and [y/n] could feel her face muscles ache at the undying smile.
kylian watched from the doorframe, eyes drenched in obvious adoration as his girlfriend began to go around, socialising with the rest of his family. his sister is quick to welcome her with a hug and a kiss to the cheek, ruffling the curls of her daughter in [y/n]'s arms. if he hadn't decided to grow old with the girl, he certainly did now, for the sight of his most beloveds intertwining with so little difficulty made him feel full with joy.
+_-
the little girl in her arms began to grow restless, and with the sweltering heat beating upon her skin, [y/n] unleashed the hyperactive kid, submerging back into the air conditioned space inside. she went to look for kylian, stopping at the door of the living room (overly spacious, but embossed with pictures and trophies, made it feel smaller and more homely than expected) as she noticed two boys frantically clicking button on a controller, tv glowing with running, animated people in a sea of green. decided to not disturb and leave kylian to (hopefully) reign victorious this time round.
[y/n] found herself exploring the corridors of the house, gazing into framed photos hung upon the walls. a family so deeply knitted that not one was left out, and she couldn't help the thought of her face one day being displayed with pride, maybe with kylian beside her, or maybe just her, as she alone was enough to be one of them.
she ventured into the kitchen absentmindedly, meeting fayza stirring into a steam pot, napkin draped over her shoulder.
pushed all her nerves aside as she saw an opportunity to bond with her mother-in-law, "is there anything i can help with, ma'am?"
she was quick to spin around, a smile blooming as she recognised her voice, "you want to help?" [y/n]'s gesture was thoroughly appreciated, but the question left fayza's throat apprehensively.
"yes," then a laugh, accompanied by a permanent smile, "kylian is playing fifa with ethan so i really have nothing to do."
the older woman grunted knowingly, shuffling through the kitchen as [y/n] shadowed her.
"that's all the do when he comes here," a freckled hand is waved, aloof, "don't mind them."
she slid a bowl of freshly washed vegetables, dappled with droplets of water, "dice these for me, dear."
[y/n] acquiesced promptly, and the kitchen swiftly subsided into a warm silence. she chopped them with such experienced velocity, and fayza showed her an approving smile, althought she was too focused to notice.
"you know what you're doing."
the girl turned to the woman next to her, grinning, "have to be, or kylian would be a lost cause."
the guffaw that followed was thick with expectance and genuine hilarity, "you're very funny, looking after that boy isn't an easy task."
"you can definitely tell me about it," she fell silent as she focused on cutting off the butt of the onion, "but i love him, and forever will."
fayza felt her skin buzz with exhilaration and couldn't fight the urge to hug the lady helping her.
"you're such a lovely girl, perfect for my kylian," broke the hug and scanned the face of the girl that had her son immeasurably in love, "stand by him, okay? people out there are harsh, and, yes, i know that he's a strong boy, but with you beside him, he'll be stronger."
[y/n] exhaled, leaning against the counter as fayza started to fry the vegetables that she had chopped, "i won't lie to you and say it's easy because it's not," a hand rubbed down her face, "i don't get why people are so... brutal. it's like the only focus on his negatives when they lose, but praise him when they win, and i see that it gets to him a lot."
fayza knew what they, as a family, holding the name mbappé, just like the one that etched the back of france's golden boy, were getting themselves into. a life no longer hidden, everything was out and vulnerable for everyone to see, and if each blink and breath wasn't scrutinized by 'fans' (as they liked to call themselves, but tend to act otherwise) then something wasn't right.
"that's just how the world is, dear. they're backstabbers, running wild with no inch of humanity left in them. but you have to remain sturdy, be it alone or with the support of other people. and for kylian's case, he has us."
us. [y/n]'s skin crawled with thrill.
"you're part of the family, now, [y/n]," fayza smiled, eyes lined with aged wrinkles, deepened with the peaks and troughs of the past, and still to, with what was yet to come, "one of us."
she smiled, heart clashing with her ribs, "thank you, fayza. it really means a lot."
she returned it, arms agape, "it's nothing, dear. now, come here!"
[y/n] entered her arm, laughing loudly as her mother-in-law kissed her forehead, "and remember, if kylian ever does anything wrong, tell me, and i'll deal with him."
"i definitely will, ma'am."
she was given a disapproving look in return, "ma'am? please, call me fayza, or mum, which i prefer." winked and laughed.
however, their moment was cut short as shouts outside the door began to crescendo.
"—not only are you running away but your running to your girlfriend who i didn't even know was here!"
the kitchen is penetrated by the fury of two boys, of which their ages were miles apart but would think were near by how they acted, kylian's face contorted into a frown, "it would be a curse to introduce her to you, ethan."
the teenage boy gasped, kicking his brother, "take that back!"
"over my dead body!"
ethan scowled back, looking at her, before any trace of his negative expression seemed to disappear into thin air, "[y/n]! oh my days, you're prettier in real life!"
she grinned sheepishly, "thank you, ethan."
kylian, however, found no amusement in his words, hiding his girlfriend behind him, "oh please stop that crap. get yourself your own girlfriend!"
"and you just love hating! i bet your girlfriend is better than you at fifa."
"take. that. back."
"let's see it," he walked towards her, putting on the best puppy eyes he could muster, grabbing and tugging her arm, "please, [y/n]? play fifa with me?"
kylian glared at him, slapping his hand away.
"don't touch her!"
she turned to look at fayza, who nudged her head, "don't worry about it, go and take those hooligans with you."
+_-
10 minutes later, ethan was one goal down, with [y/n] on a aggregate score of 3.
"you're good at this— like good good. better than kylian."
to ethan's satisfaction, his older brother had been summoned by his mother to help her, saying he 'needed to use that football strength to good use'.
"how the hell did he even get a girlfriend like you? way too good for him, in my humblest opinion." she knew his question was far from ill-mannered, and didn't take it to heart. ethan tend to say whatever came to his mind at that moment.
"he definitely tried his hardest to ask me out," [y/n] stated, chuckling at the ever-vivid memory of his unrelenting advances.
"he's never one to give up, is he?"
she shook her head, "absolutely not. gave him my number for professional use only, and he saw the opportunity to flirt with me."
ethan visibly cringed at the fact, "that's embarassing."
"it was cute," she shrugged, "until it actually started to work and it all went downhill- or rather uphill- from there."
ethan's irises glimmered as he attempted a shot, but took in a sharp breath as he missed.
"all i can say is, he loves really hard. hasn't loved anyone as much as you, but from what i hear from him about you, he's deeply infatuated. i think it's scary, at this point," paused to regain his bearings as the ball was within [y/n]'s possession once again, "but, as much as i make fun of him, he's a good person. sometimes too good for his own sake."
he spoke truth. truth that hurt, because kylian's kindness was constantly taken for weakness, but he always, without fail, moved past it without another thought wasted.
"and he hides how much it affects him."
"exactly," ethan responded immediately, then laughed, "you know him just as much, or even more than me."
[y/n] grinned, "happens when you spend everyday with the boy. he's more readable than he thinks."
"or maybe you adore him so much that you just... care."
silence, then, "or maybe that."
it was only the noise of intense clicking and frustrated sighs that filled the room for a few minutes. it was a relaxed quietude, one that none saw the need to disrupt, but ethan wanted to express how grateful he was for [y/n]'s presence in his brother's life. it was comforting to know that he had someone, that wasn't a platonic friend, to confide in and find solitude in.
"you two were definitely meant to be."
"you think?"
"yeah," he looked at her, taking a hand off of the controller to punch her lightly in her arm, "i see you becoming [y/n] mbappé, one day."
"really?" her voice was incredulous, "you see me being one of you lot?"
"come on [y/n]," ethan rolled his eyes affectionately, "you're already one of us."
415 notes · View notes