#ignore any mistakes pls i am SO tired

[elysianymph]

signed, sealed, (not) delivered

A collection of letters exchanged between Dorcas Meadowes and Marlene Mckinnon between 1975 and 1981.

dedicated to @lesbianmckinnonn

ZANDRA HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY LOVE <33 i wish you the best and hope you have a great day. i'm so glad i met you, you're so talented and i love talking to you about our silly little headcanons and screaming about the angst we write. sorry for giving you angst on your birthday (i'm not) but that's my brand and this idea came to me one night so i had to. hope you like it <33 (sorry if i make you cry)

The first letter — or rather piece of parchment that they wrote on together — was exchanged during a particularly boring Defence Against The Dark Arts class in their fifth year. Even Dorcas couldn't help letting her mind drift elsewhere as the professor talked, her manicured nails tapping against the wooden desk, counting down the seconds until the unbearably boring class would be dismissed.

Until a piece of parchment had landed right in front of her. She looked down at the offending object like it would turn to ashes from her gaze alone. The last thing she needed was a detention for passing notes.

She looked up, hoping to see who had thrown it at her, and she immediately made eye-contact with a pair of smug hazel eyes that belonged to none other than Marlene Mckinnon, her rival on and off the quidditch pitch. Her eyes narrowed in suspicion as she glared at Mckinnon who wore a grin on her face, a dimple appearing on her left cheek from how hard she was smiling.

‘Open it,’ she mouthed to Dorcas, sending her a wink. Dorcas felt her cheeks heating up — in anger and annoyance, obviously — but her curiosity took over and she opened up the parchment carefully, bracing herself like it would explode in her hands.

‘Meadowes, are you going to grace us with your presence at the Gryffindor Tower this Friday?’ was scribbled on the parchment in Mckinnon’s messy handwriting. Dorcas’ eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

‘Why are you so interested? Hoping for something?’ She wrote and threw the note back to Mckninnon’s desk, making sure the professor’s back was turned so he wouldn't catch her.

Dorcas watched Mckinnon from the corner of her eyes as she quickly wrote down her reply, pausing before scribbling something else on the note. She threw it back to Dorcas discreetly.

‘Don't flatter yourself, Meadowes. I’ve just heard you’re good company when you’re high and trust me, there will be plenty of weed. My friends made sure of it.’

Dorcas rolled her eyes, taking a peek behind her to see the aforementioned friends sitting in the back of the class, trying to keep their laughter in at some ridiculous joke.

‘And by your friends I suppose you mean the four imbeciles sitting in the back poking each other in their asses with their quills?’

Mckinnon choked back a laugh as she read Dorcas’ reply and Dorcas had to force her head to turn away so she wouldn't continue to watch as Marlene laughed, mesmerised by how her eyes turned to crescent moons.

‘They’re having more fun than we are, you have to admit.’

‘I would be having more fun if you would stop sending me these notes.’ Dorcas threw the note back, not bothering to even look at Mckinnon.

‘I wouldn't have to if you answered my question.’

Ah, so Mckinnon wasn't going to let it go. Dorcas finally writes the question that had been going through her head the entire conversation onto the parchment. ‘Why are you even asking? It’s not like you're going to spend time with me.’

Mckinnon actually pouted when she opened the note. With a crease between her brows she threw it back at Dorcas.

‘How will you know if you don't show up?’

Dorcas stared at the note for a moment, perplexed and at a loss for words. What was she supposed to say to that? She turned to look at Mckinnon — hoping to read from her expression whether or not this was some big joke — only to see her biting at her lower lip, watching Dorcas intently. When she realised Dorcas was looking she perked up, eyes wide as she mouthed ‘please.’

Dorcas turned back to the letter and let out a sigh, her anxiety leaving her body along with the air as she made an impulsive decision. She wrote down her reply and threw the note to Marlene, not giving herself a chance to overthink it. ‘I’m expecting the weed to be free.’

Mckinnon threw the letter back to her with a playful wink. ‘I’ve got it all sorted out for you, don't worry your pretty head about it.’

Dorcas gave her one last look, the ghost of a smile on her lips. She rested her head against the palm of her hand and the rest of the class seemed to pass by in a blur, her thoughts occupied by the girl in red as she absentmindedly played with the crumpled parchment.

The second (first?) letters they exchanged were over the summer break right after their fifth year. Surprisingly, all that was needed to bring two rivals together was a bunch of weed and Firewhiskey. Dorcas and Marlene had bonded quickly after that night, fights on the quidditch pitch quickly turning into playful teasing in the halls. Marlene had even snuck into her dorm one night, a pack of cigarettes in hand and a soft smile on her face as she asked for some company. Dorcas was grateful that the cover of the night had hidden her flushed face from Marlene’s view.

Which is exactly why Dorcas was stuck in this predicament because Marlene had left her jumper in Dorcas’ dorm and Dorcas — instead of immediately returning it like a normal person — kept it under her bed and wore it every chance she got like some sort of creep. She had held onto it until the last days of the school year when she was packing her bags and reconsidering what she would do with it. Ultimately, she didn't have the guts to approach Marlene and give it to her. So now she was sitting in her room at home, writing a letter that she would attach to the jumper she should've returned months ago.

‘Dear Marlene,

I hope your summer is going well. Everything seems easier now that the threat of our OWLs isn't ahead or at least in my mind it does.

While unpacking at home I found a jumper that definitely wasn't mine and after asking my roommates none of them told me they had lost a jumper while at Hogwarts. I came to the conclusion it must be yours since you were the only other person who I had brought into my dorm. You probably forgot it that night you snuck in.

I’m really sorry it took this long for me to realise but even the nights are too hot this time of year to wear jumpers, so I hope you didn't miss it too much.

From Dorcas.’

Despite second-guessing her choices and being unable to sleep one entire night, Dorcas didn't regret the letter after she had received a reply from Marlene in only two days — along with a pack of homemade cookies.

‘Dear Cas,

I knew I hadn't left that shirt at home! I couldn't for the life of me find it in my dorm room and I was scared I had lost it. Glad to know it was in good hands! Must’ve spilled some perfume on it though, smells just like you :) Not that I mind, you smell really nice.

I hope you’re having fun! I was wondering if you wanted to meet up over the summer sometime? Just the two of us, out in the town or maybe at a pool or something? We could even go to Hogsmeade if you want.

My mum encouraged me to send a gift back since you were so kind as to mail the shirt back to me, so I baked some cookies for you! I’m still new to it but these are my favorite to make so I hope they’re good enough for your tastes.

Can't wait to see you again!

Love, Marlene.’

The simple exchange had left Dorcas a giddy, smiling mess for days, impatiently waiting for the days to pass by so she would see Marlene’s face again, maybe wearing the jumper Dorcas had stolen.

By the time the summer holidays after sixth year had started, Dorcas had lost count of the letters she and Marlene had sent each other. That summer however, unlike the last, was radio silent until the last week of August. This time when a letter assigned to Dorcas arrived and she had recognized the Mckinnon family owl her stomach hadn't filled with butterflies, rather a sickness she could feel rising to her throat. The sickness had built up until Dorcas couldn't handle it anymore and she had finally, finally torn open the envelope that had sat on her bedside table for three days.

‘Dorcas,

sorry if you end up needing to use a decoding charm on this letter but I can't seem to stop my hands from shaking as I write. I’ve written this letter a million times and thrown it into the trash every time, which is why it took me a month to send this in the first place. I’m wearing my Gryffindor robes at the moment, channelling my inner bravery. It’s not working.

I’m sorry for kissing you on the train.

Well, I’m not, actually. I liked it, your lips are really soft, just like I imagined. I’d been dreaming about doing it for so long, I just wished I had done it in a better way. I didn't mean to run away after either. Not my proudest moment, I’ll admit.

I just wanted to let you know how I really felt before we all finally grew up and I was forced to deal with the reality of our world. All of my friends are talking about the war and the preparations, Sirius is losing his mind and Lily is determined to join the fight. James is right behind her and his boys will follow blindly. But all I’ve been able to think about is how I want to kiss you and hold you in my arms, run away with your hand in mine to some place no one will ever recognize us.

I know it’s wrong — not how I feel about you because a love as pure as this could never be evil like the people who can't understand it try to make us think — but the way I’m disregarding every other thing in favour of you. I can’t help it when all that I dream of is your eyes looking into mine and that pretty smile on your face, lighting up the room. Funny to think that even the dead aren't guaranteed to feel heaven but I already have, in your presence.

I’m sorry for being a coward and not saying this to your face, sorry for not giving you the love confession you deserved. Romantic candles and sunsets on the beach but I was never the type to follow the rules, was I?

Hope you like the blueberry muffins I sent you. I know blueberries are your favourite (they might be my favourite too now that they remind me of the taste of your lips).

Yours, Marlene.’

Dorcas hadn't dignified that letter with a reply, instead letting the bravery so unlike her green robes wash over her as she ran to hug Marlene at the train station, pressing their lips together and feeling the fireworks explode between them as the world melted away.

A crumpled piece of parchment was in her pocket, a simple ‘I love you too’ written on it in case her words failed her. But by the time she had pulled away from the kiss and seen Marlene’s teary eyes and wide smile, she felt like no words were needed when her actions had done the job.

After that, the years had passed by in a blur. The world had changed and Dorcas could feel it crumbling beneath her feet and threatening to swallow her too but she hadn't paid it any mind, too focused on holding her love in her arms.

Marlene.

Marlene with her pretty smile and soft lips, always a cigarette between them — a bad habit she couldn't seem to break. Marlene with her hazel eyes that pulled Dorcas into a forest she dared not to escape from. Marlene, beautiful and alive Marlene, whose arms would always be Dorcas’ home.

There was no need for fear when Marlene would press a kiss to her lips and wish her good luck on her next mission with the Order, a playful promise of making her favourite meal by the time she returned. As if Marlene wouldn't be far away on a mission by the time Dorcas was back. The reality didn't matter, not when they would always come back to each other, alive and in one piece.

At least until Dorcas had received another letter from Marlene. Despite the circumstances, she couldn't help the smile that had crossed her lips when she opened it, feeling like she was once again 16 and hopelessly in love. Only one of those things had changed.

‘Dear Cassie,

sorry for sending this on such a short notice but I had to tell you I won't be waiting for you at home when you return. Don't blame Dumbledoor this time, blame my mum. My brother is back from abroad along with his family and mum is insisting we have a family reunion in the middle of a war.

I can't even blame her when things are getting so rough. I hate to think about it but it may be the last time I see my family all together. I’m sure you’ll understand why I’m inclined to visit even when it’s so risky.

I assure you I’ll be fine like I always am. You take care of yourself, can't have you sitting in St. Mungo’s during our anniversary.

See you soon, love, miss you terribly.

Yours, Marlene.’

Dorcas held onto the letter like a lifeline only a week later, wearing black robes wet from rain as she watched her love be lowered into the cold ground undeserving of embracing her. Her salty tears had smudged the sacred ink which had immortalised Marlene’s last, hopeful words.

“I think it's strange…” Lupin began to speak as he walked up to her. Dorcas remained unflinching, staring straight at Marlene’s casket and hoping, praying for a miracle that would confirm this was all a dream. She would wake up in Marlene’s warm arms, safe and sound. Instead, Remus’ next words only served to twist the knife further in Dorcas’ chest: “That the Death Eaters just so happened to attack the one night that Marlene was there.”

“What are you insinuating, Lupin?” Dorcas asked, not in the mood for his vagueness.

“There are only a few close people Marlene would've told she was leaving to see her family,” Remus continued, “and we know there is a traitor among our ranks. I’m afraid Marlene may have just told the wrong person the wrong thing.”

Dorcas’ eyebrows furrowed and she looked up at Lupin, who was turning his head away, inviting her to follow his suspicions.

She followed Remus’ gaze, landing on Sirius’ hunched over form. She had to do a double take, to make sure she hadn't already gone crazy with grief but there was no mistaking who Remus was looking at. When she looked back up at Remus he only gave her a nod, confirming her thoughts.

But it couldn't be.

No.

Dorcas’ eyes trailed down to Sirius’ hands and there it was — the red and gold friendship bracelet Marlene had made back in 6th year for Sirius’ birthday. The two star charms still dangle from the worn out threads, shining against his pale skin. It was all the confirmation Dorcas needed that Sirius was innocent, as if the tears streaming down his face weren't enough.

She wasn't sure what had possessed Remus, if the war had really made all of them so distrustful, if perhaps she and Marlene had only been shielded away from it because of their love for each other. In that moment Dorcas dared to think death a mercy, for at least her and Marlene trusted each other until the end. At least she had lost Marlene instantly instead of watching her drift away and turn into an unrecognisable shadow of the version she had fallen in love with.

“Remus…” She looked up at him, tears that she thought she had bleed dry threatening to fall again. She spoke again, unsure of who she was convincing, herself or Remus: “You don't actually think that.”

She watched Remus shake his head, swallowing the lump in his throat. “I’m just telling you to be wary,” he said and walked off, leaving Dorcas alone with her thoughts.

One thing was for sure, she wasn't going to stop until every one of those wretched bastards was dead.

Dorcas’ body was found in early August of next year, surrounded by the corpses of Death Eaters she had dragged to death alongside her. One final act of revenge. She was buried alongside Marlene by request of her family, with two unused wedding bands on a chain around her neck and her final letter in her pocket — two declarations of a love that wasn't allowed to bloom.

‘My dearest, Marlene,

I love you, my star.

I know how much you loved to hear it when I would press a kiss to your lips and smile, whispering the same words into your soft skin. I hope the words reached you all the same when I whispered them at your grave with my lips pressed against cold marble.

Forgive me for not writing to you sooner, I’m sure you’ll understand why. Every time I tried to pick up a quill to write, the only thing that would stain the parchment were my tears. I had no words for such a long time, nothing to say, to express my grief when it seemed like everything was gone and everyone had moved on without me, without you.

The distant look in your hazel eyes still haunts me but I’m afraid I can't remember what your smile looked like. Your laugh still rings in my ears when I wake up but I can no longer remember the sound of your voice. The fragments are there and I’m still desperately clinging onto how your tongue used to curl around my name, how you would stretch the last syllable when you wanted to tease me.

I can still feel your hand ghosting against mine, your cold breath against the nape of my neck as I cook your favourite meal in our kitchen. I still make enough for two and bring out your favourite plates, although I’m not sure why. I hope you don't mind that I’ve been using your cherry perfume, that expensive one Peter bought you for your birthday last year, I know it was your favourite. I’ve used up almost all of it by now, even though I used as little as I could every day, but I can't help myself to find comfort in every small thing that reminds me of you. I’ve been wearing your clothes recently, the old ones that still smell like you and your cherry body wash, though overpowered by the smell of smoke that still clings to them. Your old quidditch jumper is very comfortable, if a little small, I’m not sure why I stopped stealing it from you.

You had looked beautiful even that day, as they lowered you into the cold ground and I watched my own life be buried alongside you. Ever since then, the world has been cold and grey, the same as your tombstone. I hope you didn't mind my constant company those first few weeks but I couldn't bring myself to leave you alone, I could barely restrain myself from digging my fingers into the dirt and wrapping my arms around your cold bones and carrying them back home. I think they would offer more comfort and warmth than this cruel world has this year. I think my love should be enough to wake you up from your slumber.

The heavens are not merciful enough to agree.

I’m writing this to say goodbye one last time for I never got the chance to before and I hadn't mustered up the courage earlier. I’m going into this mission knowing it will be my last, knowing that all that will remain of me is my lifeless body if I am lucky enough. I had expressed my fear of dying to you when we were younger, eyes brighter and lungs full, but now I find myself strangely numb to the knowledge that I’m inviting death to my door. I had been afraid then to die without living the life we had planned together, to die without letting you know how deeply my love for you lives inside me, engraved into my bones. Now that my biggest fears have come true, I find that the fear has left me — perhaps just another thing I left buried alongside you.

My hands are stained red from the revenge I’ve tried to take but I know you will welcome me with open arms. Your friends — and what little I have left of mine — have tried to comfort me, to help me but they can't understand how I feel without you. They do not know that without you I am nothing, not when I had spent half a decade planning my life with you. I love you so much that even in your absence you are all I can think about, the words and touches I did not get the chance to share, the plans I did not get to fulfil because of my cowardice. I cannot imagine loving anyone the way I’ve loved you in your life and continue to after your death. You, dead, are so much better than anyone alive.

I cannot avenge you because even if I killed every single one of them, their souls wouldn't be enough to make up for the loss of yours. At the same time I cannot move on, not when you stand in the way of my life and when I dare not push you away, you are so far out of my reach already. There is no other choice for me but to join you. So this may not be a goodbye after all, perhaps just a notice that I’ll be with you soon if the heavens decide to bring us together again.

Please forgive me for not mailing this last letter, I don't know your new address.

Yours, in life and in death, Dorcas.’

Somewhere, far away in time and place, brown eyes meet hazel and Dorcas’ heart beats once more with no other purpose than to love.

[poopiefart420]

young and turnt on ember island

Bonus doodle vvv

[milflewis]

or can you make sewis toxic

the gc said what if seb n lewis were teammates at merc during baku 2017 earlier today and my brain is fucking melted and this came out. what if lewis went to ferrari after 2016. what if baku happened while they’re were both in the title fight for a wdc with ferrari and make it be the worst possible scenario. what then

“I’m not very nice today,” Sebastian laughs, titling back in his chair, smile bright and toothy, red shirt loose and too big along his shoulders. His fingers are ringless, tapping away on the arm of his chair, no bracelets either excerpt for a thin material one, faded blue, and a thick sensible watch. “Sorry.”

He doesn’t sound sorry but then again, Sebastian never does. Lewis only shrugs, letting his eyes soften, reaching over to bump Sebastian’s chest with his closed fist, light and easy. Mattia is peering over the file in his hand from across the room. “It’s alright, man. Losing can be difficult to swallow.”

Sebastian is far too good at his job to glare at Lewis. His smile simply widens, chin tilting down so he can glance up through his lashes. “You’d know all about that, wouldn’t you?”

Lewis laughs, stretching his legs out in front of him, feet crossed at the ankles, until his back clicks quietly. “I would,” Lewis says and the helmet painted in Lewis’s colours on the shelf behind Mattia holds the exact same number of stars, one grey, two silver, one red, as Sebastian has titles. You’re not special, Lewis thinks. Not to me. I see you. I know you as a racer. As a human being. I. See. You.

I’m not Mark Webber, Lewis had said to him, last year after they had handed him the trophey and he’d become the first Ferrari world champion since Kimi. Sebastian had only laughed, furious and spitting and grinning, no?

Nah, Lewis had leaned in close, smelling his sweat and champagne and the race track that always seems to cling to Sebastian. I’ve beat you in your own team, haven’t I?

That hadn’t wiped the smile off of Sebastian’s face, nothing had that year, not once he started losing and never stopped, but something in his eyes had flickered, got you, and he had said, they aren’t my team, like it was awful and terrible and the worst thing he could think of. He didn’t say they’re yours because apart from the very few times Sebastian very distinctly is, he generally isn’t much of a liar.

Lewis had known him a long time at this point, as a friend and stranger and colleague and rival and teammate and ally and rival, and had just shrugged. Yeah, they are, man. They’re Ferrari, they’ll never be mine. And they’ve got to be someone’s — too needy not to be.

Then why are you here. It was the first time since Lewis signed the contract on the heels of 2016 that he saw Sebastian desperate and it was even partly real. Maybe I just want to win with every team, Lewis had watched Sebastian’s fingers pull at the sleeves of his race suit, the material damp and thick. That’s what the papers are saying, anyway, so it must be true.

Sebastian hadn’t said anything to that, jaw still set and tight, knuckles white where he had twisted them into the material. Lewis could’ve forgiven him for choosing Nico over him, or at least, not choosing Lewis. Could’ve and did. He was even able to forgive him for not saying anything when the shit stupid jokes came back after he signed and the Tifosi lost their shit, bouncing back and forth between ecstasy over getting Lewis Hamilton in Ferrari, stealing him from Mercedes as if Lewis hadn’t walked away on his own two feet, and the horror of having a black driver in their beloved team.

What he is not able to let go, and probably couldn’t even if he tried, is Sebastian not taking back what he said after Baku, never telling anyone that he was wrong, even after the FIA of all people stood in Lewis’s corner. It wouldn’t have hurt so much except —

Well, Lewis had thought, hadn’t he, and —

— it didn’t matter. Not in the end.

Sometimes, Lewis looks at Sebastian, beside him on the podium, across a team briefing, staring in front of him, behind, right there, and he hates him. He’s pretty sure that they could’ve, maybe, possibly, been something.

Sometimes, he even catches Sebastian staring back but for all that he swans around, all open palms and look here, look, look, I’ve got nothing to hide, I swear, he can be so very difficult to read. And it’s been a over a year since Lewis has trusted himself around the other man.

[osaemu]

GOJO SATORU: ❛❛ SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGE ❜❜

.ೃ࿐ staying the night at your ex-husband's house was a mistake. NSFW

contents: fem!reader. you and gojo have a daughter. oral (m. and f. recieving), satoru calls you a slut + whore, degradation mixed with praise, mocking, dacryphilia.

author's note: edit—crying bcs an irl read this and alluded to it in one of our convos pls actually kill me /hj

"hey, sweetheart," the man holding your daughter's hand says casually, as if he doesn't know how much you hate the pet name. "you took your sweet time."

a familiar scowl makes its way onto your face and you cross your arms. "satoru, will you ever stop calling me that?" you ask exasperatedly, pressing two of your fingers into your temples.

six years.

you've known satoru for six years, and you were his wife for four of them. now, after a long, painful road, you two were finally divorcées.

it's been a year since you and satoru ended things, and sure, it was hard for all of you, but life moved on. your daughter, to her delight, still gets to see her father on weekends. and unfortunately, you usually tagged along.

"mommy, can we stay for the night?" your four year old asks, looking up at you with big, shiny eyes. "please?"

you hesitate — if it were up to you, you wouldn't stay in this house, the one you once lived in any longer. "sorry, pumpkin. i think we should go. wouldn't wanna intrude on daddy's space any longer."

you hate the look on satoru's face when you refer to him in the same way your daughter does. fucking pervert.

"you two can stay as long as you want," satoru interjects smoothly. he smiles lazily, kneeling down to your daughter's height and ruffling her hair. "it's kinda late, isn't it? i'd hate for you to have to drive all the way back in the dark."

"yeah, mummy!" your daughter says, nodding along to satoru's words. "i'm tired."

you wince and ignore the smug grin on satoru's face as he stands back up with a soft grunt. "we should head home, kiddo. i bet your dad has work to do, and we have our own house."

satoru frowns slightly at the last statement, but he doesn't even consider shooting back — not in front of his daughter. "sweetheart," he says to you, voice coated in that sickeningly sweet tone that you hated, "it's late. and i don't have any work."

when satoru sees the way you scowl at him, a smile tugs at the corners of his mouth. "you have any other reasons why you wanna leave?"

none that you need to know.

both your ex-husband and your daughter, who takes after her dad more, take your silence as grudging agreement. 

"hey, kid, d'you want to go to bed?" satoru fondly asks your daughter, ruffling her hair again. when she nods, sleepiness evident in her eyes, satoru scoops her up and carries her off to her room without looking back.

when they turn the corner into your daughter's room, you sigh and plop down on satoru's couch. your ex-husband was an infuriatingly good father, and it pissed you off. 

a couple minutes later, satoru strolls out of the room, closing the door gently behind him. 

"so, babe, you dating anyone?" satoru says conversationally as he plops down on the couch next to you. he's close enough to make you tense, but stays just out of your personal space.

"what's it to you if i am?" you mutter, ignoring the pet name. you know that if you tell him to stop, he'll just say it more, so you don't bother.

he scoffs and faces you, resting his back against the arm of the couch. "what's up your ass today?"

"fuck off, satoru."

satoru whistles and tsks at you, shaking his head. "language, sweetheart. you kiss our daughter with that mouth?" 

after a couple seconds, his expression softens and he studies your face carefully. "what's on your mind?"

and just like that, you're back to the times when the two of you were happy. back when satoru wasn't such a dipshit and actually cared about how you felt.

unfortunately, those times were over.

long over, you remind yourself as you dig your nails into the palm of your hand. "nothing you need to be concerned about," you reply. your tone is clipped, and the words come out harsher than you meant them to.

satoru doesn't seem to mind. in fact, he has a lopsided grin on his face as he scoots closer to you, a mischievous glimmer in his eyes.

"you wanna fuck it out?"

his words are so unexpected that your mouth almost drops open. thankfully, it doesn't, but a couple minutes later, your legs do.

"fuckkk," you moan, tilting your head back as satoru's tongue trails a stripe up your slit. 

"keep it down, sweetheart," satoru says without looking up. "don't wan' to wake up our daughter, do ya?"

you hum in response, physically covering your mouth with one of your hands to muffle the sounds escaping the confines of your lips.

in the year that you and satoru had ended things until now, you'd slept with a couple guys. you'd even dated one or two of them, but god, none of them could use their mouth like satoru could.

satoru can't help but smile as he eats you out, pulling away momentarily to shake his head at you. "tsk, you were so mean to me earlier. and now look at you." he dips his head to nip at your clit and grins when he feels you flinch.

"i've barely even started and you're already drippin' all over my sheets," he mutters, lips brushing against your inner thigh. "fuck, takin' my tongue so good, you little slut."

"satoru, i w-wanna cum," you mewl, shuddering when his tongue re-enters your folds. "wan' you inside me."

"i already am, dummy."

you feebly attempt to swat his head in response before scowling and insisting that he knew what you meant.

satoru scoffs as he pulls himself up to face level to you. he readjusts his position over you so your back is pressed into the mattress underneath him before pressing his lips to your ear.

"let's put that mouth of yours to use, yeah?" he mumbles, slipping two fingers underneath his sweatpants' waistband and tugging him off. 

it's been years since you last fucked with satoru, and in that time you had forgotten just how pretty he was. you'd never admit it out loud, but you really didn't mind the reminder. setting into a comfortable position, you wrap your lips around his cock, relishing the way his moans get louder and louder.

you hum slightly, resisting the urge to smile when you feel satoru shake from the vibration. but god, his reaction when you run your tongue over his tip? priceless.

"fuck, baby, it's been too long since you've sucked me off. forgot how good you were- aah," he cuts himself off with a breathy moan. "fuckkk."

you briefly stop to look up at him with a cheeky smile. "you still moan like a girl, satoru."

"and you're as much of a slut for me as ever," he grumbles, reaching down and pushing your head into his painfully hard cock again. "d-don't stop, baby. feels s' good."

satoru's moans only get louder from there, until you have to be the one reminding him that your daughter's asleep two doors down.

"m' gonna cum," he whines, grabbing a handful of your hair and tangling his long fingers in it. "swallow all of it, yeah? don't waste a drop."

you nod your head obiediently, using your tongue just the way you know he's always liked to push him closer and closer to the edge until–

"fuckin' whore," satoru gasps, groaning loudly as he cums in your mouth, hips grinding against your face. "aah, missed your s-slutty tongue, baby, fuck."

"missed your girly moans," you manage to gasp before his tip hits the back of your throat, painfully so.

"shut up and swallow," satoru commands, tugging on your hair just enough to make you cry out. "yeah, who's moaning like a slut now, hmm?"

after you swallow all his cum and lick your now-swollen lips, satoru has you open your mouth so he can check. 

"good girl, looks like there's at least one thing you can do right, even if it is just sucking me off. c'mere," he mutters, pinning you down on the mattress and making the bedsprings creak loudly. "m' gonna fuck you, m'kay?"

you nod, reaching out to stroke his saliva-covered cock. "y-yes, please, satoru."

your ex-husband, who you should really not be fucking with, looks down at you with a smirk and takes your hand, bringing it up to his lips. "you look so pretty, baby. all covered in my cum, never looked hotter."

he nudges your legs apart with his knee before pushing himself into you, gritting his teeth through a smug grin when you cry out in pain. "careful, baby. wouldn't wanna wake up our daughter with your slutty moans, would ya?"

"s-satoru, hurts s' much," you whine, pawing at his chest. "you're too big, i can't-"

"you're too big, i can't," satoru mocks, rolling his eyes. "how do you think our daughter was made, baby? did the storks just drop her off?"

his next thrust is particularly harsh, and something about your pained cry almost makes him cum again on the spot. "fuck, we should do this more often," satoru cooes, reaching up and stroking your cheek. "wait, you cryin'?"

yes, you were crying. your cheeks were wet with a mixture of your tears and the remainder of his cum from earlier, and fuck, all you could think about was satoru's cock. so much for being so over him.

satoru laughs, shaking his head and slowing his pace to give you a kiss. "just when i thought you couldn't get any prettier, you gotta go and prove me wrong," he mumbles, licking his lips. "god, you're fucking beautiful."

he presses his lips to yours again, this time letting his tongue slip into your mouth. "i missed you so much, baby. i still do," he mutters in between kisses. he's controlling the pace, purposefully making each kiss's ending sudden as to not allow you to talk — only him.

"you know how many times i've jacked off to you?" satoru breaths, reaching down to grab your thighs and push you impossibly deeper into him. "you know how fuckin' much i want to put a ring on your finger?"

"satoru, i-" you try to say, but his mouth is on yours before you can finish your sentence. and a couple seconds later, more words are waterfalling out of him.

"fuck, baby, you have no idea. i fucked up, but i swear i've changed. c'mon, give me one chance, i-"

"mummy? daddy?"

you and satoru both flinch and whip your heads towards the door when you hear your daughter's voice, preparing to make up some far-fetched story to tell her besides we were fucking.

thankfully, the universe allows you two seconds to cover yours and satoru's bodies with a blanket before your daughter opens the door and pokes her head inside. "i heard noises."

you look at satoru for help making up an excuse, and thankfully he has one ready to go. 

"oh, we were just watching a movie," he lies, running a hand through his hair. "go back to bed, kiddo. we'll tuck you back in in a second, yeah?"

your daughter looks at you before looking back at satoru and nodding. 

"close the door, please!" you call as she turns to leave. when the door shuts behind her, you let out a long exhale and bury your head in satoru's chest.

and to your horror, the door opens once more.

your daughter looks at you with shiny, curious eyes. "mommy, are you and daddy back together?"

satoru saves you from having to answer that impossible question with a laugh, wrapping his arm around your shoulders and pulling you closer. "go back to bed, pumpkin. i'll be there to tuck you in."

ten seconds after the door shuts for what you hope is the final time, you turn and glare at satoru. "you're gonna tuck her in?"

satoru scoffs in mock disbelief, raising his eyebrows and pointedly looking you up and down. "if you wanna tuck in our four year old daughter covered in my cum, be my guest."

you nudge his arms off of you and bury your face in a pillow, groaning softly. "fuck you, satoru."

"love you too, sweetheart."

[almightygremlinblob]

In Every Life (AMAB Ver.)

In which Sukuna falls in love with the Reader without realizing it.

Word Count: 5, 466 of slow burn. ⚠️Content Warnings⚠️: True Form Sukuna, Heian Era, Sukuna fluff, soft Sukuna, mentioned cannibalism, slight angst, Sunshine AMAB!Reader but gender neutral expressions used, Reader is not a sorcerer and is implied to be the only non-sorcerer of her village. THIS IS NOT BETA'D and I am very tired while editing this. SO! If you spot any mistakes, esp. around the parts lmao, since I made two ver. of this, pls tell me! Minors and ppl not okay with anything sexual pls DNI and have a nice day 👍🏽 AFAB!Reader (with gender-neutral pronouns) here

⚠️Further Content Warnings⚠️: Virgin!Sukuna, Sub!Sukuna, Reader and Sukuna both switch from gentle doms to subs, size difference, soft & fluffy sex, very messy sex, Reader makes out with the tummy mouth, anal, cock worship, Reader makes out with tummy mouth, lots of fluids in general, lots of mouths, consensual blood drinking, this is getting worse the more I write lmao.

You were happy you managed to catch the attention of the King of Curses.

Sure, you didn't exactly know how you did it. You weren't strong, or exceptionally beautiful like the sons and daughters offered to him. You weren't even that smart!

You were clueless, as a matter of fact!

So clueless that, nearly two weeks ago, you gave the strange looking man with four arms a warm meal and a place to stay for the night - since it didn't seem like the storm would let up any time soon. He was pretty much shunned by the rest of the village upon his arrival…probably due to the overwhelming energy that sent people into fight or flight…but he was just born different!

Probably.

"What's your name, Mister?"

"…"

You quickly learned that he didn't speak much, and he does not like to be looked at. Only watching as you go about your day - trying your best to navigate through the judgement and, frankly, abuse of the other villagers; ever as judgemental about you as they were likely to talk down on you, spread rumors and try to take advantage of your endless kindness. Not that it worked, though - and for that, everyone pretty much hated you. Despite his silence, your visitor was the only one that seemed to regard you without any ounce of hatred.

Then, one day…

"Why do you entertain them?"

"Ah!" You visibly jumped at that moment - up until now you were certain he couldn't speak. His voice was lovely baritone, but held a quiet authority - much like him…and a very clear evil but you wouldn't dwell too much on that. "M-me? Oh…of course, me…"

"U-um…I'm not entirely sure, actually. I don't like them, b-but…" Those sharp, piercing eyes are distant, scanning the forest as you tried to think of a reason. "I-I guess they're my neighbors. Friends? No. But it wouldn't be right to just outright ignore them."

"Hmph, of course…" He scoffs, and rolls his eyes. "You people and your morals…"

"Do you not have friends?"

"No."

"Oh…" Your shoulders slump slightly. "Then, consider me your first friend!"

"No."

"Oh…"

When you visibly deflate, he laughs lightly, shaking his head as if he's heard something utterly ridiculous. "Why does that bother you? You hardly know me. I could be a mass murderer for all you know."

"Because you…you're…" You think for a while, before finding the right words. "One of the most unique people I've ever had the blessing of meeting."

His eyes finally land on you. "Blessing, huh?"

------

Eventually, the villagers turned violent towards you and your guest, but you did your best to keep him safe - urging him to leave, quickly. It was that day, when you were nearly beaten to death, that you learned the strange man's name.

"Die, you peasant!" There was something in the way these villagers attacked. A strange energy that made it hurt all the more. You were bloodied, bruised and beaten to the point you couldn't even find the strength to scream. A blade was pointed to your throat. "Any last words?"

Despite yourself, you manage to spit at him.

"I didn't think you had it in you." That familiar low voice, low and uninterested, sounds from behind you both. Then, before your very eyes, everyone was somehow cut to pieces. No screams, or cries…just the sounds of flesh and bone being cut apart. You were probably hallucinating...

You see your guest walk beside you - the gore, guts and limbs not affecting him in the slightest.

"Ah, you're okay…" His eyes land on you again. "B-be careful…t-there's an invisible…invisible something that's cutting people up…"

He scoffs. "And if I told you that was me?"

"What."

"Tsk." He promptly grabs you and, without you even realizing, your wounds begin healing, closing up, and suddenly you're more aware than you were a while ago. Then, with the flick of his wrist, the bodies get further chopped apart. The gears in your head start to turn and your eyes widen. "O-oh…"

"Go on, then. Go ahead." He grabs your face, forcing you to look at the disembodied people and the growing river of blood. "Run."

"No. No…" Your breathing steadies, and you relax into his hold. He must sense it with the way his whole body tenses for a moment. "Not from you."

In the silence, you can practically hear him thinking as he gets up. And when he made no move, you realized he was waiting for you. So you got up too, wordlessly, and began to follow him. After a while of silence, he graces you with his voice again - quiet, almost…soft.

"My name is irrelevant…but people call me Sukuna Ryomen, the King of Curses."

------

And that was the start of your new life, as a servant of the King of Curses.

It…wasn't so bad! Sure, you could be killed any day, like a few of the other servants and many of the courtesans, but you also didn't do much! And, best of all, no more of those abusive neighbors! Your days were mainly spent helping the head servant - the attractive one with white hair and a pink splotch - do things for the king, for only up to four hours. Four hours! Then you'd spend the rest of the day doing whatever!

This was not one of those days, however.

Today, you were cleaning the Lord's study, in his chambers, along with the attractive head servant. There were...a strangely high number of Dokudami paintings...

"The Lord seems to have an obsession with this herb. Does he like it?"

"That's an interesting observation. Though you're mistaken. It's more the symbolism of this plant."

"And…that would be?"

"Its flowers are delicate, pure. The plant itself is medicinal against many illnesses - it's endlessly helpful. Kind. But it grows everywhere, even in the places not many grow. A surprising resilience despite it's 'delicate' nature." The head servant explains, and you can hear the tinge of amusement in their voice. "Remind you of anyone?"

"Uh…no? No one comes to mind…"

They simply snort at that.

------

The first time you were called to his chambers, you thought you were going to die. Actually, everyone thought you were going to die. They were all giddy at the thought. You didn't expect to just sit there in silence while he practiced his calligraphy.

"I can hear you thinking. Speak."

You fidget around a little, before getting the words out. "I've always been meaning to ask…why…why me, my Lord?"

He clicks his tongue. "You dare question my choices?"

"N-no! Only…I'm curious."

Sukuna is silent for a while, hand perfectly still as he thinks, before eventually speaking.

"You calm me." He sighs as his brush continues to move. "Somehow, every time, you calm me."

------

The courtesans could see you from outside, and you could practically feel them glaring daggers at you - endlessly furious and envious that you could be that close to the Lord.

"My Lord, you…never seem to show interest in your courtesans. Have they, I mean…" You weren't sure how to word it without coming off as too brash.

"Of course they try to bed me. They always do. Don't even try to hide that they're doing it to gain a semblance of power in my estate. The last two were just…" He waves his hand dismissively, tone making it abundantly clear he wasn't happy with the memory. "Had her head cut off and the second had his limbs strewn on the floor."

You feel his gaze on you, scowl evident in even his voice. "Why do you ask me about this?"

"It's just…you have so many, I thought, well..."

"Tsk. They only want something from me, and they think they can take it freely. From me. Me!"

"Surely not ALL of them…" You fidget a little. "Why would you keep them around if that was? There's…there's so many…"

You can practically hear his smirk. "Because their organs taste GREAT sautéed."

"A-ah…"

He snorts, seeing your discomfort. "Are you afraid of becoming like them?"

"I…hm…" You look up in thought. "Perhaps…"

He lets out a soft laugh. "Then you truly are a fool."

"But…I think, it would be a good sacrifice." You finish the last area, as he goes awfully quiet. "Like an offering to a god. I think…I think I wouldn't mind that."

His presence is more than clear behind you, strong and foreboding. "Do you mean it?"

"Yes."

"Do you trust me?"

"Of course."

"Liar. Everyone says that…" He scoffs. "…but, nobody means it. If given the chance…"

You hear a sound, sharp and strong, much like a blade. A pain blooms from your wrist, and you realize you're bleeding lightly - only a few drops of blood at a time. "They all run."

"No. I wish to stay by your side, my Lord. I have nowhere I'd rather be." When you relax and make no move to run, a big and warm hand engulfs yours.

"You…weren't lying." You feel lips against the wound on your outer wrist, and the swipe of a tongue against it before the wound starts to close. "You fool…"

------

Many in the estate didn't like you, jealous of how close you were to the Lord - but it wasn't everyone. Now, it was everyone. Rumors fueling jealousy and malice for the very obvious favoritism.

Taking little nibbles, you didn't want to take more than your share.

The food was beyond AMAZING. However, Sukuna simply scowls as you shyly keep your head bowed and you must feel his gaze harden by the way you flinch under it.

"I apologize. I just…don't want to take more than my share…"

"Do you mean to insult me? This entire meal is yours." He scoffs, grabbing your bowl. He grabs one of the sushi rolls and puts it against your mouth, which is still closed due to your surprise. "Eat. I won't accept this…whatever it is you're doing."

"O-oh, I-…thank you, my Lord." You open your mouth and allow him to feed you. Light blush forming from how good the food is. Yes, that was definitely why. "My compliments to the chef. This is beyond delicious, my Lord…"

And it was true, the sushi, the miso soup, selection of meats, everything tasted DIVINE.

"Compliments taken."

WAIT-

You nearly choke on your food. "I-I apologize…my Lord. I, you…for me???"

"Use your words."

"I mean, ah…" You shake your head, trying to recover from your mind going into overdrive. "You…made this for me?"

"Yes." He says it so plainly.

"What…what for?"

He doesn't answer and, for once, looks unsure. "I…I don't know."

------

When you came out of his chambers unscathed the second time, everyone - except for Lord Sukuna himself and his servant - went into a frenzy. The servants were appalled, the courtesans were fuming, and you made sure to steer clear of everyone who now seemed to loathe you. And, soon enough, all your duties were either with the head servant, with Lord Sukuna, or by yourself. Still, you didn't feel safe in the estate anymore.

Then, one night, the head servant came to your quarters, stating that "Lord Sukuna has requested I take you to his chambers."

If you weren't going to die physically, you would die of embarrassment.

Still, you followed the white haired servant to his chambers, entire form trembling as you nearly stumbled over yourself. Sukuna glances you once over, and can't help the snort that escapes his lips. You looked like a newly born fawn with how shaky your legs were.

"My sincerest apologies. I just…nervous…"

"That much is clear. Sit." Something is off and you can tell he's tense. "This probably isn't going to go how you're expecting."

You do as he says, sitting seiza in front of him. Something sharp is pointed to your throat, right where the artery is. Your eyes go wide, but after a little bit, you allow your entire body to relax. If you should die by anyone's hand, it would be his.

"Look at me." He commands and you look up, seeing him holding a spear of sorts. For the first time, you see him - truly see him. His form beautiful, terrifying and divine all at once. Your eyes and body must show your adoration, because he looks away - as if uncomfortable.

He shuts his eyes, and the spear is repeatedly pushed against your neck, as if trying. However, it never follows through. This was so easy for him, and yet…

"My Lord, if I should die today, it would be the greatest honor for it to be by your hand." Your body relaxes, eyes close and you lean into the blade of the spear. Sukuna tenses, and you feel it in his hold. "If it's by your hand, my Lord, I can only die happy."

"Yes. That much you've made clear." You hear him sigh, tired and defeated, as the spear drops to the floor. "To think this is how I'd lose…how pathetic…"

"M…my Lord?"

"Leave."

You see him, frustrated and defeated, and it makes your heart ache to see him like this. Without even realizing it, your hand reaches out and stops just before touching him. "Might I stay for you? Please, I only want…"

His glare nearly has you frozen. "THIS is how you want to celebrate a victory over me?"

"No, my Lord. I only wish to stay by your side and help how I can."

He's quiet, clearly upset. "Do what you will with me. I might as well be worthless like this anyway."

"Never to me, Lord Sukuna." You take his hand in both of yours, and bring your lips to his knuckles but he quickly pulls his hand away.

"What?!" He snarls. "What use is your loyalty to someone like me now?"

"You are my Lord, Sukuna. I serve you…" Your eyes meet his, full of longing and concern. "Anything I can do to help you, please let me…"

His eyes briefly glance at your quivering lips, leaning in without realizing before he turns away with a click of his tongue.

"Leave."

And you do as you are told.

------

"How is Lord Sukuna?"

Was one of the most frequent questions you'd pester the head servant's ears with. They roll their eyes. "He's not frail, you know. You don't need to worry about him like a mother hen."

"I just…it's been a week since I've seen him! If he doesn't want to see me, that's fine, but…I-I'd at least like to know if he's okay…" You sigh. "And what I did wrong…so I can avoid doing it again!"

"Just give him time to process." The head servant states nonchalantly. "This is new territory for him."

------

The silence was…

Awkward, to say the least.

Not a word uttered as he continued to paint those stupid edible weeds in the candle-light. It was already late…

"A-ahem." Your voice breaks slightly when you clear your throat, and you feel his gaze on you. "M-my Lord, if there's nothing else, I shall retire for the night."

"Stay."

What.

"Don't make me repeat myself." Clearly your reaction was evident in your body, and you choke on your words before they even get out.

"That night was my first defeat." He says, as if sensing your question, yet you hear a tired and heavy sigh. "As of now, it's been my only one."

"But…have you been okay, my Lord?"

"Always about me, hm?" He scoffs, and there's tension as his footsteps grow closer. Your eyes meet his, beautiful and terrifying, when his fingers gently tug your chin up - guiding you to look at him. Guiding your body to the mattress as he cages you underneath him. "And why not just claim your victory? I have no right to complain. Isn't that what you meant to do the night you defeated me?"

"What? No! My, Lord, no! I-I'm sorry. It wasn't-I didn't mean-It's not what you think! I could never-" Your hands cover your mouth - shocked at the implication. "Oh Lord Sukuna, I bow to you! Only you! I-I will never, could never, force something like that on you! Not then. Not now…"

"Good. This was getting overwhelming." He sighs and then promptly rolls off you, plopping down to your side. Though your skins were still touching and, for once, Sukuna didn't mind someone this close to him in this way. He was relaxed, as if his worries melted away. You couldn't help the smile that grew. This was the Lord you know - a walking death and calamity, now pacified. You both face each other and he can't help but look away, cracking under the weight of your loving gaze - full of adoration, concern and awe.

Weak.

He was weak.

"Lord Sukuna, may I?" Your hand reaches out to him, stopping just before reaching the wooden part of his face. He was so terribly beautiful.

"Do as you wish." He mumbles, and you gently hold him - even though he doesn't show it, you can feel him tense.

"My Lord, what's wrong?" There it is again, the weight that makes him feel like he's breaking without being broken. "I know you don't need it, but I only wish to help in any way I can…"

His mouth opens and closes several times before he's able to finally find the worse. "You've broken me. Made me weak…and I can't even curse you, or wish we'd never met because I'd be lying."

You chuckle. "My Lord is far from weak."

"Yet I am powerless against you." His four eyes bore into you, in them a mix of desperation and longing, as you gently stroke the wooden part of his face. Finally, he closes his eyes, relaxing against you. "And I never thought defeat could feel like this…"

"Is it pleasant, my Lord?"

"It is…" You feel his fingers tracing along your collarbone, up to your jawline and you feel something wet licking your skin as his hand rests on your throat. A mouth on his hand, gently licking and suckling on the sensitive parts of your neck. "…but only if it's you."

"Lord Sukuna…" Despite everything, you feel he's still tense. "You're tense. Would you like me to…?"

"Yes. I meant to bed you tonight, but this…it's…" He sighs. "Overwhelming. I'm not clueless, but something about you makes it all…too much…"

"Then let me lead, my Lord." You gently push him down, and he lets you - following you as you guide him. His hand takes hold of your chin, pulling you in so your lips meet his. His kiss was tentative and unsure, or perhaps more accurately, scared. Scared of every feeling that threatened to overthrow him. You eagerly massaged your lips against his nonetheless. "Please…allow me to worship you tonight, Lord Sukuna."

His breaths become heavier when you straddle him, gently undoing his kimono while he easily rips your clothes to shreds with a flick of a wrist. Your lips mark his skin gently. Moving down to worship his mouth, jaw, his shoulders, both chests and finally to the mouth on his stomach - who was breathing just as heavy. Sukuna tenses when you take his tongue into your mouth, sucking on it and explore the much bigger one with your smaller tongue.

When you pull away, there's a small pool of saliva where the stomach mouth lay open and plenty on you where the mouth-hands had left their marks on your skin. Both his cocks, beautiful, heavy and fat, sat on his stomach where they were already leaking with arousal. Sukuna's breathing turned heavy, and as your hands move to his waist, stopping just before doing anything, you look up at him. "My Lord, if at any time you wish for me to stop, please say so. I will stop without hesitation or question."

"Always about me…" He chuckles and, in a sudden movement, easily manhandles you so your ass is on his stomach-mouth. "No, I do not wish to stop. But if you truly ask for nothing in return, then let me be gracious."

"M-my Lord, ah-" Your eyes roll back when you feel that giant tongue lapping at the rim of your hole, the both of you moaning as he did so.

"Delicious…" A hand finds its way to your length, giving it lazy strokes before a mouth opens up and begins licking you - before taking you in. The heat of his mouth felt absolutely divine. The mouths on his other hands suck hickeys and bite the skin of your neck, while they find the sensitive nubs on your chest and harshly tug at them with teeth and lips, too. You hear a noise that's half-way between a whimper and a moan. "…everything about you…so delicious…"

"That's it, my Lord. I'm yours tonight…" You sigh, mind in bliss as your hands find his cocks. He bucks his hips when you begin to stroke him - slowly, before building to a steady pace. His cocks were thick and fat, heavy and veiny and monstrously beautiful in all the ways that had you nervous to take him. They throbbed eagerly, dare you say even aching for your touch. Bowing down, you take one of his tips into your mouth, careful not to let your teeth get in the way. The way his tip had pulsed and the amount of arousal you had to swallow down, had you moaning and whining happily as you swallowed his cock. Amidst the low growling of his stomach mouth, you hear a noise that's halfway between a whimper and a moan, and feel him buck his hips into your mouth as you lick and suck on him eagerly - tongue, lips and hands feverishly worshipping Sukuna's heavy, monstrous lengths.

The tongue begins to enter you, and you nearly cum on the spot - choking on his cock. Slowly, it reaches deep, deep enough to hit that spot that has you seeing stars. When you continue to moan, Sukuna's hips move on their own - tip fucking your mouth while you drool and stroke him.

You both get lost in pleasure. His large tongue tastes and moves eagerly inside you, practically assaulting that sweet spot as the stomach mouth continues to growl and whine and drool. While you eagerly suck on and stroke his twitching and throbbing lengths and he returns the favor, albeit a little more sloppy.

A guttural moan escapes Sukuna's throat when he releases into your greedy mouth, and you do your best to swallow everything he has to offer while his other cock paints you in white. Drool, precum and his seed still leak out your mouth, though - and you quickly find it's too much. Before you can stop yourself, you release into the mouth sucking you off - ass clamping down on the large tongue inside you as it continues to move inside of you, well past your high. You cum heavy into one of your Lord's many mouths, and it gags on your cock - the sensation making you spurt more into the mouth that greedily tries to swallow everything.

His tip leaves your mouth with a sloppy and wet pop and with a groan, both tongues take one final lick before retracting back. You both are breathing heavy, shaking a little as he repositions you to face him. His hand caresses your face, eyes completely dilated as he makes a noise somewhere between a moan and a sigh.

"Oh, gods, look at you…"

"My Lord, I-" Your eyes widen a little as you struggle a little in his grasp. "Wait-"

"Have you forgotten who you answer to?" He clicks his tongue. "You are in no position to make demands of me."

"I…answer to you, my Lord." You still, realizing what he was asking you. "I'm sorry."

There's a small silence as you look away bashfully. However, when you glance back at him and are met with a frown - there was the sudden realization of an unsaid question waiting to be answered. He hasn't moved at all. Immediately, you explain yourself, not wanting him to get the wrong idea. "I-I'm still a bit sensitive, is all…but I-I still want this! Truly, my Lord! I-I want…I want you, still."

Your voice comes out a little higher than you would have liked, but it seemed to quell him nonetheless.

"As am I, but…" He sighs and before he looks away, you capture his lips in a chaste but wet kiss.

"I know." You bite your lip bashfully and your voice comes out soft and sweet in all the ways that make his cocks twitch. "But, I did promise to worship my Lord tonight. I shouldn't make a promise I can't keep."

When your hands begin to stroke him again, slow and gentle, Sukuna practically throws his head back, biting back a low whimper while his stomach mouth shamelessly groaned and panted. He cursed as his hips began to move on their own, muscles tensing as his cocks grew hard again. Yet when your eyes lock he only sees adoration and longing in them as your hands worshipped him diligently. Not the empty lust he saw in everyone else who wanted him this way but could never get close.

"You look incredible like this, my Lord." Your voice comes out raspy and full of longing, and it tears a near animalistic sound from him.

"Enough." He growls, and you immediately stop. "Let me inside you."

"Anything for you." A mix of arousal, anxiousness and excitement overwhelms you as you climb on top of him, positioning yourself so his bottom cockhead kisses the entrance to your ass - readying you as it spurts those large trickles of precum. The both of you share a guttural groan as you sink down on one of his cocks, the free one throbbing delightfully in front of your own length. Sukuna was massive, to say the least, and despite how dripping wet he was your legs were still shaking from the wonderful strain. Although, your gummy insides took him in eagerly while being stretched to their limit.

The initial pain of the stretch was nearly drowned out by how wonderful he felt inside of you - fat and veiny cock completely filling you, dragging deliciously along the inside of your ass. You could feel him his arousal leak inside you, lubricating you plenty, and his length pulsing like a second heartbeat. And when you fully sheathed him inside of you, you both almost lost the ability to think properly.

"S-Sukuna, my Lord…" You'd be embarassed by how shameless you sounded with your Lord now fully inside you, his fat mushroom head leaking on and throbbing against that sweet spot. His hands rested on your hips, keeping your bodies joined with a messy puddle of arousal underneath you both. Sukuna's eyes were rolled back and fluttering slightly while his stomach mouth was open with his massive tongue lolled out, making a noise somewhere between a low growl and a whimper. Seeing him like this nearly sent you off the edge.

"O-ooh, gods…" He groans when he feels you clamp down on him, and a hand pulls your head into a clumsy kiss. You feel his breath turn into full on panting when he tasted himself on you, the hands on your hips now painfully digging into your skin as he begins to thrust up into you - sloppy, slow and languid, as if trying to get even deeper and split you apart. Your free hands, once caressing the wooden part of his face, now move down to stroke his free cock - earning you a low growling from the stomach mouth as it started panting.

"Oh, you feel heavenly, Lord Sukuna…" As if encouraged by your words, his thrusts start to get faster, harder - a steady rhythm beginning to build. "That's it. You're doing so well, my Lord."

"Ngh, ah…" Your Lord made such sweet sounds.

Neither of you were going to last long, it was all too much.

"A-ah, it's so good my Lord…" The pain had long subsided, replaced only with ecstacy. Sukuna's fat and heavy cock dragged along every part of your insides, and the feeling of the warm arousal dripping from his tip and the throbbing of his veiny length had you near screaming into his mouth. Your Lord was completely filling you and leaving no part of you unloved. While your ass, already sloppy and wet with Sukuna's arousal, desperately sucked him in every time you and him moved, only to be rewarded as he thrusted back in and you bounced back down on him, wet velvety insides squeezing him tightly as if never wanting him to leave. Without you even realizing it, your body was unconsciously and sweetly worshipping and loving your god. "I love you, Lord Sukuna!"

Something in Sukuna snaps upon hearing those words, which were otherwise empty - had it come from someone else.

"I want to taste you." He practically whimpers into your mouth as you both pant and continue to knot tongues. The kiss is clumsy, inexperienced, but you were far too lost in love to care - exploring your Lord's mouth eagerly while you struggle to ride his beautiful, monstrous form. The tongues on his mouths sucking, biting and tasting your skin; marking every bit of your body they could. This would hurt, but you didn't care. You only wanted to show your god how much you loved him. "Let me taste you…"

"Yes, my Lord. Anything-" This would hurt, but you didn't care - only wanting to show your god how much you loved him. "Anything you wish of me…"

With the flick of his wrist, there's a sharp pain on your tongue and a metallic taste floods both of your mouths - there's not enough damage to fully cut off your tongue, however, only a cut.

"Swallow me." Sukuna's breath hitches as he continues to kiss you, letting out a noise between a growl and a whimper, and you realize that it wasn't only your blood in both of your mouths. An offering of a devotee to their god, and a god to their devotee. You eagerly swallow each other's blood, moaning into your mouths as you share the messy, bloody kiss.

"Y-yes, keep going my Lord…" You continue to encourage him, as one of his hands moves to take both of your lengths and stroke them together. You and Sukuna both throw your heads back and nearly yell as the mouth on his hand opens up and swallows the both of you - tongue working eagerly on both your tips while your hands work on the shafts. "Cum for me, my Lord. Please…"

His thrusts get faster and harder, and you bounce on him just as fervently. What was once a steady rhythm has now turned sloppy as you both rode each other into your high. Sukuna reaches his orgasm with a choked yell, and you reach yours with a scream - bodies tensing as you both get lost in each other and neither of you stop moving. His warm and thick seed floods your insides, far too copious and spilling over. Your ass spasms and clamps down on him, almost painfully milking and sucking him in, desperately trying and failing to keep his overflowing love inside. The mouth that held both of your cocks greedily tries and fails to swallow all of the overflowing love as you and Sukuna both cum heavy into it.

It feels like forever, but you eventually collapse on top of him - both of you too tired to pull out of either hole. Though the mouth that held both of your cocks still lazily licked up at all the overflow. Minds completely muddled neither of you could think, bodies shaky with the high and tranquility of post-orgasm. There was nothing but the sound of your breathing for a while, before he silently cups your face and you feel the sting on your tongue disappear. With shaky hands, you touch your tongue and find the cut was healed.

"Thank you for sharing your blood with me, my Lord." You bury your face in the crook of his neck. "If I may, might I stay the night?"

"You'll be staying here every night, from now on." Without realizing it, his lips reach your forehead. "And for the rest of eternity, you will never leave my side."

"Yes, my Lord. I swear it." It was one simple, powerful vow that had you staying by his side for the rest of your life…

And made you return to him, in every life after.

-----

My GAAAHD was this difficult to write. Not the writing part itself, NO. But finding the time for writing. YEEESH. Anyways, have a great day!

[ilys00ga]

𝗶𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗱𝘀, 𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗻𝗮𝗶𝗹𝘀.

➞ pair: yoongi x reader.

➞ genre: hurt/comfort (why do I keep making these lmao), established relationships, I'm so bad at tagging sorry.

➞ warnings: angst and fluff cuz we all need that (we really do). reader has anxiety and abandonment issues, yoongi is trying his best for the sake of both of them, just relationship things.

➞ A/N: requested by @parkjennykim, this was very fun to write! thanks for yet another idea <3 I hope u like it. I'm organizing this blog/post (?) while listening to mono, and let me tell yall, it's such a vibe omg. I think you should read this while listening to that album, I love it sm, I can't even begin to explain UGH- if namjoon ever goes on a world tour, he better perform every single song in that album, cuz imma be losing my mind in the crowd, esp during moonchild. my vocal cords are already getting sore. yeah. if u want this to hit that spot, maybe u should do what I said (this is a friendly order, if u will). if not, just enjoy and pls ignore any mistakes, english has been challenging me recently (for the last 10 years lmao)

ps. I am in a dire need of a yoongi in my life. specifically the one I wrote in this one. oh how I love being a lonely fanfic writer <33

★ MASTERLIST.

ᵎᵎ 𖦹彡⋆｡˚・ ─ ・ ⋯ ・ ─ ⊹ ♡₊˚๑

God knows how long it had been after it hit midnight when Yoongi stood in the kitchen. His eyes were red and heavy with drowsiness, but he couldn't sleep that night.

How does one sleep through a restless, biting night?

Surely not with a bad headache, or overflowing thoughts, and especially not with guilt chewing on his core.

He gulped, throat begging to be quenched as it held onto a slight, delicious, yet bothersome burning sensation. He opened the fridge and filled a glass with some water, raising it to his lips when loud a cry of his name, followed with a thud and a number of sobs, disturbed the quiet of the night and made him jump, startled.

His limbs froze in their place, glass almost slipping his hand and crashing on the floor when his sleep deprived brain realized that the muffled cries were yours.

Wide awake, he dashed after the sound. Thirst and sleep no longer occupied his mind, all he could think of was holding you in his arms.

He found you on the stairs, trembling as you wailed into your hands.

He hated it so much: seeing you in pain. He wanted nothing more than to shield you from the rainfall of your gloomy sky, from his own rainfall, from the world. How could one be an umbrella and the rain at once?

He blinked, once, twice, then gulped and heaved a deep, tired breath.

One storm doesn’t require another storm to be calmed down, that he knew. One needs to be composed and collected to stand still during a storm, that he knew as well.

With worried eyes, he gently called out your name and walked up to you, “darling, what’s wrong?”

You looked up as soon as you heard his worried voice, some tiny sense of relief washed over you when you saw him right there. A hundred daggers digged so deep into his heart and bones, aching, the moment a broken whimper of his name fell from your lips.

Without a second thought, Yoongi hugged your face to his chest. One of his hands was patting your back and the other affectionately caressed your head.

As he listened to his name that never left your lips, Yoongi held you there on the cold of the stairs with nothing but sweet nothings whispered back to your ears.

Everything he did and said was so gentle and soft, like he was so afraid you'd crack and come to tiny bits and pieces at any given moment. It all made you want to cry even harder, to hold him so tight and never let go.

Soon, when your tears started winding down, pulled away and cradled your face with his hands, palms faintly pressing on your cheeks as if he hoped to share their warmth with you.

Tender eyes met your wet ones and stared as their owner’s voice made its way through the noise of your sniffles and hiccups. He said, “It’s alright. I'm here. Talk to me, hmm?”

You answered his plea with a small nod, before wiping your tear stained skin and hugging him again. He smelt like home. You took a deep breath, greedily feeding your lungs with his lovely scent.

He hugged you back, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling your body closer to his. He pressed light kisses on your temple, patiently waiting for you to talk.

“I had a really scary nightmare. so, so scary- I woke up, didn’t find you there- then…then I remembered the fight we had earlier. I…I thought I lost you- I'm sorry. sorry for the stupid things I said earlier. I love you so much! please don’t leave. please..”

Your voice quivered with fresh tears ready to be spilled again. Yoongi started hushing you as soon as he noticed that you were working yourself up.

Squeezing you in his arms, he whispered “I never left, and I never will.”

“I’m all right, nothing happened to me, see?” he leaned away just enough to allow you to take a quick look at his body, then added, “a stupid fight is not going to make me leave. I love you way too much for that, and I'm sorry for hurting you too.”

He could still read fear and uncertainty all over your face, and he didn't like that. He knew that you trusted him, and he didn't doubt your love for him.

At first, he didn't get it. He didn't understand the insecurities, the anxiety and the nightmares you suffered from especially after the inevitably worst of arguments that happened between you and him. But after longer and deeper talks, with you expressing your feelings and him listening with careful ears, it made much more sense to him.

Sometimes he hated himself for triggering your alarms and making it harder for you, but he knew it was neither his fault nor was it yours.

Growth and pain are two key elements that come arm in arm with love, and fights are an unpreventable part of any kind of relationship. For all that, he always ended up blaming himself for making you question your worth to him when he can't even sleep without you happily cuddling his side.

Softly, lovingly, he started prepping tender kisses over your cheeks, nose, forehead, chin, temples, all over your flushed face.

It worked like watching waving fields of green wheat dancing with the wind, your storm started to slowly die down and your heart felt at ease again. slowly, but definitely.

Smiling ever so affectionately, Yoongi sealed his reassurance with a loving kiss that consumed you whole, and it left the corners of your mouth curving up in a dazzling smile. You nuzzled his chest and sighed.

“I really hate fighting with you.” you mumbled into his clothed chest, drained and light headed from all the crying and nearly-a-panic-attack you went through.

“I know, I'm sorry. I hate it too." he whispered back.

There was a pause of comfortable silence, with both of you breathing each other in, before he wondered aloud: “did you fall down the stairs? are you okay?”

You chuckled breathily at his question, recalling the hysteria he had to deal with just a few minutes ago. But Yoongi was there, right beside you. your arms were tightly wrapped around his torso, right by your side.

He had some kind of exceptionally irrepressible magic in those fierce eyes and that gummy smile of his, you inarguably couldn’t be more grateful for that.

“I'm alright. Was too busy crying, I didn’t even feel a thing to be honest.” you said, and he giggled.

“I love when you’re clumsy like that, but please be more careful, muffin. Can’t have you hurting yourself because of me even more." Even with your face buried into the crook of his neck, you could feel and hear the heavy pout in that comment.

Huffing, you leaned away with furrowed brows and a strict gaze. Yoongi gulped. Hesitation took over him, yet he knew that honesty is the only thing that must be present to drive this conversation to an end.

Honestly brings clarity, he found himself reminding himself of that very often.

"as long as we take care of each other, it's okay. I love you." you affirmed, and perhaps Yoongi almost teared up because of the way you looked at him right then and there. He wouldn't utter a word to spoil that information out loud, though.

The shy grin and the flushed cheeks you were met with were worth risking the entire world and its eight billion residents. You couldn't help but smile and pull him into another hug.

"This is great and all, but my butt is numbed. I think there's no blood flowing down there anymore," he said, his heart swooning when you giggled at his humorous change of topic, so relieved that he was finally able to hear your brightness again.

"Let's go back to rest, darling." He stood up, grabbed your hand and squeezed it in his, then gently pulled your body up and dragged you to your shared bedroom, where everything and everyone else meant little to nothing at all as you laid in each other's arms.

[flxwxr-bxy]

hi! I'd like to request some fluff/comfort with Rin from Blue lock with a gn!reader who has a hard time going to sleep due to being scared of having nightmares since they had a really bad one please

— PINK AZALEA ☆

☾ Hii sorry for taking so long, and I'm not quite sure if this is what you wanted, but I hope you liked it! ☆

☆ Genre: fluff/comfort

☾ Character: Rin x gn! Reader

☆ Warning: None!

☾ I am not a native English speaker, so I apologize if you find any spelling mistakes.☆

He woke up when you were leaving the bed in the middle of the night but assumed you had probably gone to the bathroom and decided to go back to sleep.

As the minutes passed, and you didn't return, he became more and more irritated. Even though he didn't like to admit it, he only got a good night's sleep if you were by his side.

He turned to look at the clock on your bedside table only to realize that it had been thirty minutes since you had left, and with a sigh, he decided to look for you.

There you were on the balcony of the house with the sleeping clothes he gave you so you could spend the night with him, and taking into account how cold the days have been and the time you have been out there, it was very likely that the next day you would wake up sick. How troublesome...

You didn't feel his presence until he sat next to you, and without thinking, you rested your head on his shoulder, feeling calmer now that he was by your side.

"Although it's a nice night, we both know you hate being sick, so would you mind explaining to me what exactly are you doing here?"

You let out a sigh before explaining what was really going on. "I had a pretty disturbing nightmare. I tried to go back to sleep, but I kept remembering it, and you came home pretty tired, so I didn't want to bother you and thought maybe the cold night air would calm me down. I didn't realize it had been so long for you to come looking for me. I'm sorry"

He looked at you, trying to figure out what you might have dreamt to make you feel so scared, but ignoring his curiosity, he decided to put you on his lap and hug you, thinking about what he could say to make you feel better.

You leaned your head against his chest. The beating of his heart made you relax slowly and feel how the sleep came back to your body, and after a while, you heard Rin talking again "We should go back to bed; it's late, and I don't feel like getting sick soon. Come on, I'll make you a tea to relax and forget this nightmare."

A few minutes had passed, and now you were in Rin's arms. The tea he had prepared was empty on the bedside table, and although Rin wasn't the best at comforting, you knew from the way he kissed your head before sleeping and hugged you tightly to him that it was his way of telling you that you were safe as long as he was there.

☾ Author's note: Pink Azalea is a flower that can represent taking care of yourself and your family. Pls reblog and follow if you want, I hope you have a lovely day or night. :) ☆

All works belong to @ flxwxr-bxy don't copy, translate or repost in other sites without my permission. Thanks ♡

[shimkongzlove]

Ryouhei x reader

A/N - loved windbreaker but I couldn't find many fics related to it so I decided to write one on my own . It is terribly written with a bunch of spelling mistakes and a basic plot. Read at your own risk ❌️❌️

Warning- mention of blood , violence , a bit of angst , sexual themes ( ig that's it )

You were working as an intern in the xyz hospital ( choose any name u like ) for your winter break . U loved working there , the staff was sweet and u received a good pay . But there were a lot of things which dint particularly suit your liking ,first and foremost it was situated in a rather shady area , the patients who came there during ur night shift were let's just say interesting .

Night shifts were something that u did not enjoy even hated to a certain level . They were tiring, boring and deprived you off of sleep . Yet what was important had to be done

4:30 am

A cold gush of winds welcomed u as u exited the hospital . The walk home was rather quite until u heard grunting from a nearby alley . Normally u would have ignored it but today u were feeling rather curious

U peeked into the alley way only to find a man surrounded by blood , lying on the cold floor . U stood there Debating whether to help the man or not and atlast ur heart won over ur mind .

U made your way to him cursing yourself for even stopping in the first place . Kneeling down next to him u observed his features . He was handsome no he was hot as fuck , the scar running down his face Made it 100 times better maybe it wasn't that bad of a decision to stop

While u were in your little dream land the man in question had regained his consciousness, his instinct led his hand to your wrist breaking u away from your thoughts .

The panic started to set in 'fuck he's awake man I hate my self for this ' , " who are you " said the stranger in question not letting go of your wrist which was starting to hurt " you're hurting me let go , please " ur plee fell on deff ears " I'm a doctor ur bleeding profusely if we don't sto-" ur words were cut short by the man pulling u closer "I asked who the fuck are you " he asked once again ignoring ur words . His deep voice sent shivers down ur body , ur face was just inches away frm his " si-sir I'm y/n , I can help you , your wounds look deep we have to stop the bleeding "

"I'm fine " he said letting go of your wrist " don't need help frm a complete stranger " "sir pls these wounds look serious I promise I mean no harm " as much as u hated the man's attitude u were still a doctor by profession it was your duty to help those in need

"My house is just 5 minutes away from here I can help stop ur bleeding and then we can both go our separate ways forgetting this ever happened deal " before he could argue his body gave up and he fell right into your arms

'Fuck he's heavy ' u somehow managed to drag him to your apartment . U laid his body down on your bed and started collecting all the medical supplys needed for the treatment .

Ryouhei's pov - 'man does my head hurt ' regaing back his consciousness he started to realize that he was not in an alley fighting people but rather he was lying on a bed one that was not his , his vision was still quite blurry from the hit he had taken , realizing he could not do much in his state he layed there accepting his faith

"Oh, ur awake I was just collecting the medical supplies needed for your treatment " "where am i" he said once again ignoring u " ur at my house, I promised I won't harm u so rest assured" u said walking closer to him " I dint quite catch ur name " " ryouhei " he said In an uninterested tone " well ryouhei-san you'll need to take of your um... clothes for me to help you..." u said as blood creeped up to your cheeks

He adhered to your request without any further question . He had a well toned body with a few cuts and scratches here and there . U caught urself staring a little more then needed, face as red as a tomato "take a pic it'll last longer " were the words that broke ur train of thoughts u felt an ache between ur legs ' this is so unprofessional, but man he's so hot ' "so-sorry, ehh anyways I'll start your treatment it's gonna sting a little so try not to move that much k?"

Sitting next to him on your bed u started your treatment , u felt him shiver under your touch "why are u doing this " he asked " I'm a doctor, it's my duty to help those in need " ur words sounded sincere to him " I'm a bad guy ukw that right " " I'm just here for the intern ship , i dont know the dirty business that goes around here " u said eyes still on his wounds , somehow u dint feel scared by his declaration , his hands went to your waist pulling ur body even more closer to his , stopping ur movements " everyone here knows who I am , many are scared to even approach I could do anything to you and ppl won't even bat an eye "

"U could have harmed me the moment you woke up yet here we are , so ik u won't do anything to me , atleast that's what I'd like to believe " " tch, ur way too confident " u decided not to reply , the time after that passed by silently

After about 15 or 20 minutes u were done putting bandages on his chest, arms and shoulders there were still a few cuts and scratches on his back so u asked him to turn around . He was now laying on his back

The spots were hard to treat because of the position u both were In , the only best possible way for u to reach them was to sit on his back "ryouhei-san ...the wounds on your back are kind of hard to reach so I'll need to change my position to treat them " " do whatever u want"

So u did what u had to , your theigs were now on either side of his body ( u were wearing shorts) touching his bare back.

Ryouheis pov

He was going crazy , the feeling of your theigs deff caused him to get a hard on not only that ,since the moment he met u . He was doomed. U were so pretty ,ur skin shining in the moon light, ur sweet voice, ur scent everything about u was intoxicating he couldn't take it much longer

He turned around causing u to yelp and hold on to his shoulders for support u were now basically straddling him " ur driving me nuts " "what did I d-" before u could finish , u felt smth poking ur inner thigh "oh" " yea feel that , that's what u did , you gotta help me now babe "

The end

( this is sooo poorly written 👎 but I had to to justice to my man ryouhei , there are barely any fics about him 😭😭 lemme know if yall want a pt2 )

( ps- this is the first fic iv ever written so please go easy on me and I hope yall enjoyed it)

[starlightsreigns]

same ol' mistakes | j. uso

summary: ginger loves her man. her friends... want her to get over her man, but sometimes mistakes need to be made a couple of times.

warnings: none.

word counts: 1.6

author's note: welcome to part three of the anti one shots! find part one and two here! not really sure how I feel about this one, but here we are. might rewrite in the future. i have a couple ones left! pls ignore the lowercase and errors.. ofc x

"feel like a brand new person (but you make the same ol mistakes)”

“ginger is now a ginger!” nia whistles. 

my hair flows down my back as she touches a piece. i can’t contain a laugh as cathy whistles alongside nia, gawking at the new look i picked up over the weekend. the higher ups agreed it was time for a new look to match my new persona. so, when it was time to sit in my stylists chair, my jet black hair was replaced with something a little more edgy. 

“you guys like it, honest, i wasn’t sure how it’d look with my skin tone.” i shrug, taking a seat beside bianca. 

bianca rolls her eyes, “you kidding? c’mon black women can rock any hair color they want.” 

it was the truth, i guess, so we sit in our group and watch the start of smackdown. in a rare occasion, the bloodline weren’t the ones to start the show. from the corner of my eye, i can see jimmy staring at me. he looks shocked at the hair change, and it takes everything in me not to react at him - not when bianca and nia were right beside me. 

“look who watchin” nia murmurs. 

caught. I feign confusion in her direction, but she can see through me. she’s always been good at calling my bullshit; that’s why she’s my accountability partner in figuring my relationship out with jimmy. 

nia leans in, “don’t do it, ginny.” 

of course, all i can do is nod. yet, it’s hard to ignore him. for two years, we were attached at the hip - correction: for two years we’ve been on-again-off-again boyfriend and girlfriend. my friends were tired of hearing the shitty things and consoling me every time we were off again. i don’t know what it is, but we just can’t seem to figure it out and we can’t seem to let each other go. love is a mysterious and trifling thing. 

“well, i don’t care, im in love” 

the match left my shoulders burning in pain. bianca walks ahead of me out of the guerilla. i’m nearly in stride with her until a hand touches my shoulder. jimmy smiles sweetly - that dumbass, goofy smile that i love so much. 

“you looked good out there with yo’ hair, gin.” he compliments with his sweet voice. 

“thanks jim, i appreciate that.” my voice soft, unsure what to say. 

jimmy opens his mouth to say something else, but bianca clears her throat. she sends me a death glare but gives jimmy a sweet grin. she comes back to take my hand, shooting a comment at jimmy before she pulls me away from him. 

“ginger, don’t piss me off, it’s been two weeks.” 

i sigh heavily, “he was just complimenting the match, B.” 

bianca whips her head towards me, “I don’t care if he was sayin’ a prayer, be serious.” 

how do i explain to my friends that this isn’t what i want anymore - the hovering, the pestering and questioning and disappointment. the disappointed looks when i even mention his name is killing me slowly. this wasn’t what i wanted anymore and when i glance back at jimmy, i knew it. 

“i can just hear them now, how could you let us down?”

happy hour came and went, but i couldn’t move from my seat at the bar for several hours. the uber ride home felt miserable and the text messages from the girls didn’t help the vomit that was threatening to spew from my lips. i barely made it through the door before i could rush to the bathroom. 

“fuck!” the scream came out of my mouth. 

this shouldn’t be my life. why am i scared to talk to the one person i want more than anything else in the world. fuck it. the ringing lasted a second before his voice came through the speaker. 

“ginny?” he was asleep. “you good?” 

my nerves set in for a moment - this was dumb but i couldn’t back out of this now. 

“i don’t want to do this anymore. i don’t want to not talk to you because the girls are telling me not to. i don’t want us to not try and figure it out when i know in my heart that we’re meant to be together and we just need to stop fucking around and make it work.” my words spill out before i can stop them. “i don’t care if it’s the same fucking mistakes, i want to make them until we figure it out.” 

he’s silent for a moment, but i can hear his breath on the other end before he clears his throat. “i love you, ginger, ain’t nobody gone change that or ever make me stop.” 

“not thinking in black and white.. thinking it’s worth the fight”

there’s a nervousness that’s settled in my chest. I wonder if they’ll know the second that they see me every time - will they know that me and jimmy are on again? that nervousness has overtaken every moment when im with them now. It’s been a month and I can’t sit and pretend like this isn’t happening. my mind is just a mess. 

“ginny, you okay, you have this weird smile on your face.” nia pokes my cheek. 

it’s become difficult to focus on anything else, while i was happy to be back with jimmy it’s been stressful to keep such a big secret from the women i trust more than anyone else in the world. 

“nah, im good, just lost in my own world.” i mumble back a quick reply. 

thankfully, the women turn back to their conversation. in the brief moment, i glance over at jimmy whose sitting with his cousin and of course he’s already watching me. he sends me a goofy smile that i can’t help but to smile back at before quickly glancing away. i just want to be near him. 

and as the night ticked on, my restlessness only increased. 

bianca kept an eye on me like i was a child who’d run the second they got their chance. it was suffocating. we sat in one of the makeshift viewing areas backstage, escaping the clutter of the women’s locker room, for a moment. jimmy sat not too far, sneaking glances at me. 

subtlety wasn’t his thing, because bianca threw random comments at me about needing to stay strong. 

“nia, please remind ginny.” bianca sighs when the older woman sits beside me. “she’s sharing looks with him.” her voice drops to a whisper as she leans across to me. 

my hands draw circles on my thigh as nia starts her pointless, and slightly demeaning lecture. 

“you’re better than this ginger…” she starts like a scolding mother. 

the tears sting the brim of my eyelids. i sneak a glance at jimmy who has a scowl on his face. he can see it written on my face. 

“we only want what’s best for you,” bianca chimes in. 

i couldn’t get a word edgewise as they continue. it's like a game of tennis and I'm the net in the middle, being jabbed by either player.

“your happiness is all that matters to us,” nia rests an arm on my shoulder. 

they continue, not sensing how over this whole situation i am, and finally i can’t help but let the tears fall. i’m not quick to wipe the tears, just stuck in my position trying not to go into a full blown anxiety attack in that moment. my eyes finds jimmy as he’s getting up and walking towards us. 

bianca looks up at him, “jimmy, this isn’t-”

“nah, Bianca,” he stops her immediately. “you know i got love for you and nia, but ease up on Ginger. She grown and don’t need y’all talkin’ to her like she a kid. I don’t appreciate you makin’ her cry over something like this.” 

the women stop, they look at me and finally see the result of their words. i can see the regret on their face. bianca wipes some of the tears off my cheek, whispering how sorry she was.

“y’all her friends, I get that, but she should be able to tell y’all anything. But y’all got her feelin’ like she gotta keep secret because you do shit like this. We got back together and we workin’ on us but she can’t do it because she worried about y’all.” 

jimmy grabs my hand, helping me up from between the women. all i can do is stare at him too afraid to look at them or the disapproval on their faces. we walk away as i try to wipe the tears that are streaming down my face. we’re halfway down the hallway before we stop, hearing nia’s voice. 

“ginny,” her and bianca wait until i turn to continue. “i’m sorry, love, we just wanted to protect you but we never want you to feel like you can’t talk to us.”

bianca nods, “we’re sorry gin, you know we’ll support you.” she looks at jimmy. “the both of you. we overstepped and we won’t do that again.” 

i stare at them for a moment before breaking out a grin and pulling them into a hug, “I love you guys,” i laugh before moving away. “I know you want to protect me, but i gotta figure my own shit out and i swear, i love this man and you don't have to hear the bullshit anymore.”

“girl, if you don’t tell us how are we supposed to beat his ass?” nia jokes, smacking jimmy’s arm. “you can talk to us.” 

jimmy takes me hand into his and twirls me into his arm. “so, we can kiss in public again, gin?” 

the girls groan playfully as I roll my eyes with a nod.

should i start a tag list?? would people want to join it? x

[danikamariewrites]

imagine dark reader who is azriels sister x lucien, she is possessive and obssesed with lucien and has plotted her way into his life. From the second she lied her eyes on him when he and feyre came to velaris she knew she had to have him no matter what. reader goes to great lenghts to make sure nothing stands between her and her precious lucien. She pushes elain towards her brother and slides in comments about how they make a great couple and that the mating bond isn’t really a big deal. She cringes while she says it bc she would kill for a mating bond with lucien, and cannot stand how elain is ignoring him. it enrages reader so much but also pleases her bc now she has him all to her self. Now lucien turns to reader for comfort and ofc reader gives him just what he needs. when they share their first night, she almost doesn’t let him leave their bed, she knows how charming he can be and the thought of someone being on the recieving end is nauseating. and anytime she hears the ic says something sbout lucien she defends him to no end, even with him there, she almost lets her mask slip, she calls mor out calmly when mor says something mean about him being there for starfall. still the next day someone broke into mors house and ruined all her dresses. no one knows who did it👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

please you would write this so good, like i’ve read through everything you’ve written. pls i’m so desperate for lucien being protected, i’d pay so much money for s fic. literally like do you take comissions??? i’d pay frrrrr

Fox Hunter

Lucien x Az’s sister!reader

A/n: As soon as I saw this I put my glasses on and opened my laptop. I love evrything about this and loved writing it. And thank you very much for reading all my stuff and liking it anon, that means a lot.

on the topic of commisions (it's been on my brain for a while), I have been thinking about setting something up to do them for a while now. So if that's something you guys are interested in let me know. I'll probably do a poll or something.

Warnings: dark!reader, manipulation, Elain slander, suggestive

When he stepped through the front door of the Town House for the first time I swear I stopped breathing. Though he was caked in dirt and tired looking, the seventh son of the Autumn High Lord had to be the most beautiful male I had ever seen.

His that tan skin glowed under the Fae lights. The scar over his eye gave him a handsome, rugged look. And that golden eye. Oh how entrancing that golden eye is.

It simply broke my heart when I found out he is mated to the middle Archeron sister. But Elain is a shell of a female now. It would be easy to dissuade her from accepting the bond.

Truthfully, I am jealous of the girl. Jealous and angry. She has one of the most beautiful males in Prythian willing to throw himself at her feet, and she will not give him a second of her time.

I watched as they sat together for the first time. How she reacted when he tugged on the bond. Elain was angry. I couldn't imagine being angry.

I placed my hand over my heart. Hoping against the Mother, the Cauldron, and the Gods that they made a mistake. That I would feel the tug in my chest for him.

I noticed the small glances she and my brother share. Azriel seemed so intent on keeping her from Lucien. Good.

If he kept Elain for himself I could keep Lucien. Another easy task. Azriel is desperate for love. They will not be hard to manipulate.

Lucien broke my heart again when he left for the Continent. I know it is necessary for the coming war, but it didn't hurt any less. I had made sure to say goodbye to him. To wish him well on his journey.

He seemed happy that someone in the court was treating him with kindness. Lucien had kissed my hand, thanking me and asked me to be safe as well. It took all of my power not to lose my composure in front of him.

After the war, after everything with Nesta, life calmed down. It has pained me to wait this long to truly set my plan into action. But good things take time.

I had made sure to spend time with Elain all these months. To gain her trust and show her friendship. "I must admit," She said to me, one afternoon in the garden. "I was afraid of you at first. You and Azriel were so simialr with your silence. Then you opened up to me and I'm so happy to have a friend like you, y/n."

I smiled at her. Although it was fake part of it felt real.

"I'm happy to have you as well, Elain. You can bring anyone out of their shell I'm sure." I smile at her from the stone bench I'm perched on. My wings spread a little to soak up the sunshine. "Well, not everyone." Elain says solemnly, looking back at her tulips.

I gently place a hand on her shoulder, "Keep trying with him Elain. I can tell Azriel is in love with you. You see the way he looks at you, yeah? There's no denying it."

Elain looks back up at me with those hopeful, doe eyes. "You think so?" "I know so." Happiness flashes across her face for a moment. Then she goes back to that somber look.

That look drives me crazy. Elain needs to stop feeling sorry for herself. It's not cute and it is driving me crazy.

"But what about Lucien...and the mating bond?" And there was what I was waiting for. "Your sisters, Rhysand, and Cassian make out to be this glorious thing. For them it may be that way. But you get to decide to do with yours.

"Do you feel connected to Lucien?" She shakes her no. "Do you feel the need to be close to him? To have him hold you?" She shakes her head again.

"Then the mating bond doesn't matter. Reject it of you must, but follow your heart, Elain. Not tradition." The fool smiled up at me again. Standing, she wrapped her arms around my neck tightly. "Thank you, y/n." I hugged her back for the theatrics of it all.

I watched as she scurried off inside. Most likely to fling herself at Azriel. It did hurt a little, telling her to break the bond. If someone had said that to me I'd most likely slit their throat.

The mating bond was something I had longed for since I was a little girl.

I had never had many friends or lovers growing up. It was just me and Azriel in that dungeon for most of our lives. And if we hadn't met Rhys I would be without wings.

When we got older I watched as Azriel had females fling themselves at him. While many of the males in Windhaven showed their intrest in me, I did not return the sentiment. I knew those relationships would never go anywhere.

So, I'd stick around for the fun they'd offer for a week and move on to the next. None of those males ever excited me the way Lucien did. Never made me feel love.

A few weeks later Lucien was back in Velaris. Rhys had sent him to the human lands for emissary duties. I made sure to ask him to lunch before the rest of the Inner Circle tortured him with their questions and scared him off.

We went to a nice restaurant with a view of the Sidra. Lucien pulled my chair out for me like the gentleman he is. Before sitting I gave him a small peck on the cheek. Holding his smooth face in my rough hand.

I could've swore I saw the corners of his lips twitch and his cheeks turn red. I bit my lip, taking my seat.

As Lucien sat across from me we fell into easy conversation. Mother above, he's just so perfect. And charming. Any female would be lucky to have him. And that female would be me.

A lull settles between us and I sip on my water. Lucien clears his throat and I meet his gaze. "Elain has asked to meet with me." His tone changed to serious, leaving the playfulness I love so much behind.

"Do you know why?" I ask, my tone coming out more clipped than I meant. "I have a feeling it's about the bond. I know her and Azriel have been...together." He said that last part like he could feel it. I could sense his discomfort.

I hated that look in his eye. That look of feeling unwanted. I had seen it in my own eyes so many times as I stared at my reflection. I reach across the table to hold his hand with both of mine.

"You deserve love Lucien. If she doesn't see how hard you have been trying for her then she doesn't deserve you. I want to see you happy, fox." He gave me a loving smile at his nickname. "Thank you, little bat. You have always shown me kindness when you family hasn't. I love that about you."

Love. My heart fluttered at the word falling from his lips. It sounds so right. I want him to tell me he loves me. Tell me he'll do anything for me like I would for him.

That night, my fox came to the Town House. I had taken it over since Rhys and Feyre moved to the River House. It was empty and quiet here.

Opening the door I saw the distraught look on Lucien's face. I felt a pang in my chest. I had caused this for him. I have to stop this feeling. Have to make him better. "Lucien," I breathed out, "come in."

I drag him over to the couch and sit next to him. We're so close our thighs are touching. I drape a wing around his back for extra comfort. "What is it, fox?"

Lucien takes a deep, shuddering breath. "We broke the bond." I want to breathe out a sigh of relief, but I have to keep the facade up. "Oh Lucien, I'm so sorry. I can't imagine the pain you're going through."

He looks at me with a pained smile, taking my hand in his, desperately kissing my knuckles. "I am hurting, yes. But Elain made realize something." I held my breath. I could feel my eyes going wide. Could this be it? Could all the work I had planned to do already be done for me by that little fool I call a friend?

"The love I have been searching for has been in front of me all along. I was never meant to be with her." Lucien slide off the couch onto his knees in front of me. My hands still trapped in his. "I love you, y/n. And I curse the Mother and the Cauldron for not putting us together. I need you little bat. I cannot bear another moment without you."

I am frozen in shock by his declaration of love. All this time I thought it would be me on my knees before him. Telling him sweet nothings and saying how we belong together. This is all I needed to hear from him.

Before anything can change I grab Lucien's face, my lips colliding with his in a heated kiss. It's all teeth and tongue. Want and desire. Lucien pulls me to his chest, holding the back of my head.

"Take me upstairs fox. Show me how much you love me." I whisper against his lips. Lucien stands, holding me by my thighs. I wrap my legs around him. I feel his hard cock pressing against my core and grind against him letting out a moan.

Lucien gently places me on the bed, careful of my wings. We undress together. Baring ourselves to each other. Feeling a bond that should've been ours.

The next morning I lay awake staring at Lucien's sleeping form. I trace his scar a few times and play with the ends of his hair that are splayed on the pillow. As his eyes slowly open he sends me a smirk. "Morning my love." Gods I want to keep him like this so I can hear his morning voice forever. It's gravely and deep, sending heat straight to my core.

"Good morning, fox. How are you feeling." Lucien thinks for a moment. "Hurting still. But I feel better with you." My smile widens. It feels genuine this time, it almost brings tears to my eyes.

Lucien moves to get up. My hand flys to grip his bicep, pulling him backdown to the mattress with all my strength. "No," I practically yell. "Stay with me? Let's stay here all day and rest." He lightly kisses my lips and pulls me to lay on his chest. "Ok little bat," he whispers.

We lay in a comfortable silence together. We trace patterns on each others bare skin until I ask, "Lucien, I know things have changed now but I need to know," My heart is pounding so hard. I hate to ask him this but I need him to feel in charge, like he wants me and I need him.

I look up at him as I force tears to line my eyes. "Are we...please say I'm yours now." His lips form a sweet pout I want to kiss. Lucien squeezes me to his body, placing a chaste kiss to my forehead. "There is no one else in this world for me. I love you, y/n. Last night was just the first of many. We have a life time ahead of us together and I don't plan on wasting another moment of it without you."

I cradle his cheek in the palm of my hand. "I love you too, Lucien. And I never want to be without you either."

[goldenempyrean]

sick!reader x natasha where nat gets home from a month long mission and learns from their friends that reader is miserable with a cold. however the spy knows how stubborn you are and wants to see how long you can pretend you’re fine until you accept being taken care of

Everything's Gonna Be Okay

Oh damn, this was meant to be a short little fic... Well here I am 3 and a half hours after starting... Oops, ALSO! I did actually edit this, I know, Im shocked too dw. (Pls for the love of God and my sanity ignore any mistakes i've missed.)

Summary: Natasha's been away for so long. Shes finally coming home, nothing can go wrong. Only it does, of course it does.

Wordcount: 3580

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Natasha gave a much-needed sigh of relief as she finally stepped onto solid ground, she never thought she’d ever be so happy to be home again. Nat had been sent away on a long deep-undercover mission and in total she had been away for about a month, however as of the nature of the mission, keeping in close-contact wasn’t possible. The only communication you received was via small hand-written letters, and they meant the world to you. though they were small you’d kept ahold of every one, keeping them safely tucked in your bedside drawer, re-reading them before you’d turn in to sleep each night. 

Which is why you had been so excited for Nat’s return; you’d even deep cleaned your shared bedroom so everything would be perfect for her arrival. Nothing should’ve gone wrong. If only everything went how you’d planned... 

~~~ ~~~ 

You’d gone to bed a little later that night, feeling a little more tired than usual, you wanted to have plenty of energy for tomorrow. That’s probably when you woke up that next morning, your body washed with fatigue and the feeling of a migraine settling in, you felt your eyes grow teary. How could this happen today? Of all days for you to get sick, why today? 

No. You pulled yourself from the bed, as you stood a wave of dizziness fell over you, sending you scrambling to grip the bedpost to steady yourself, ignoring your body's cries to remain laying down. You gave yourself a moment to adjust before forcing yourself to remake the bed behind you. There was no time to be sick today. 

You tried to sniffle, but you couldn’t. Now that you thought about it, you had been breathing through your mouth the whole morning. You twitched your nose and sniffled again, trying to get some air through your nose to no avail. You rolled your eyes, could today get any worse?  

You regretted asking yourself that question a second later when you found yourself pulling off Nat’s red hoodie (the one you’d been sleeping in for the past week) feeling an uncomfortable warmth begin to settle over you. Maybe a shower would help, you thought before making your way over to your bathroom. 

Stepping into the tiled room, you turned on your shower and waited for it to get warm, feeling dizzy again, you put your hands on the counter to steady yourself and looked up at the mirror. You felt yourself physically cringe at the sight. God, saying you looked awful would be a huge understatement, your eyes had dark circles beneath them, it looked like you hadn't slept in weeks.  

The mirror slowly began to fog up, reminding you of the shower which was running behind you. Pulling open the door, you were hit by a cascade of warm steam. It felt amazing and you could feel your congestion start to loosen a little. 

Only your delight lasted for a second, a familiar sensation creeping into the bridge of your nose. Stepping into the shower, you were only able to enjoy the feeling of the water briefly before the sensation in your nose grew to an irritating tickle. 

“Hhup’tshiew! Hh-’iishiew! HHe’TSHHIEW!” Your body bent forwards at the waist as you sneezed down into your hands before washing them off under the water, you grimaced at the sound you made, knowing it was only the first of many to come. You sighed, your stuffiness returning in an instant, though you really didn’t get long to dwell on it before you began coughing into your fist. 

It took you about 30 seconds to finally stop, “Well that was attractive.” You spoke for the first time today, finding your sarcastic tone had a painful-rasp to it, your consonants blurred by congestion. Although nobody was there to hear you, you found yourself cringing at the sound of yourself. Taking a deep breath, you could feel your chest crack, you looked upwards, allowing the water to fall directly onto your face. It was obvious today was going to be a very long day.

 You let yourself spend longer than usual in the shower, stepping out of the warm water, your body shivered and you rushed to wrap yourself within a towel. Getting changed was a task which proved harder than you thought, every time you removed the towel, small goosebumps ran down your arms, making your wrap yourself back up, desperate for warmth. Eventually though you managed to pull through and you changed into a pair of Nat’s sweatpants and a thick cotton-lined hoodie. 

It was almost 10:30AM by the time you’d wandered down into the compound kitchen in search of something to eat, you weren’t necessarily hungry but still you had to eat something. Nat didn’t like it when you didn’t have something for breakfast plus you were hoping that if you ate something then you’d feel a little better. 

Looking in the cupboards, you settled on having some Poptarts, you were reaching up to grab the box when Clint, Wanda and Bruce came into the kitchen together, they’d most likely just finished training.

“Morning Y/N.” Clint said cheerily as he came to sit at the island behind you, “Nat's coming home today.”  

“I'm aware.” You said bluntly, as you sniffled into the sleeve of your hoodie, taking two Poptarts and putting them in the toaster. 

“Woah, no need to get snappy.” Clint said throwing his hands up in fake-defence, you knew he was only joking but still, it pissed you off. 

“Can yo-” You stopped to muffle a small chesty cough into your hoodie, “Can you just stop?” You said with an irritated tone, turning around to glare at him. 

You half-expected him to return the gesture but instead you were met with looks of concern from him along with Wanda and Bruce who’d watched the whole thing unfold. 

“Y/N, honey,” Wanda’s soft voice said as she came to lean against the fridge, trying to get a closer look at you, “Clint was only joking, he didn’t mean to annoy you. You're sounding a little stuffy over there though, you feeling alright?” 

“It's okay,” You sighed, looking over to Clint, “Sorry, I overreacted and Wanda, I'm fine, don’t worry.” 

It was then that you felt your nose begin to tingle again, you fanned your face for a moment, in an attempt to somehow stave the tickle off but it didn’t help, you turned quickly to the side away from everyone as you sneezed into your elbow. 

“Hh-itshhiew! HhH’uptshiew!” You gave a small congested groan before reaching over to grab a tissue from the box sitting on the countertop. 

The three Avengers blessed you, exchanging glances between themselves. You didn’t notice however, as your Poptarts were ready a moment later. You grabbed a plate and put them onto it, taking a bite, you winced as you swallowed, the action angering the soreness at the back of your throat. You realised then that you really weren't hungry at all, you took another few bites before pushing the plate away from you. You’d only managed half of one. 

“It's not like you to leave food.” Bruce voiced the thoughts of everyone around you. 

You gave a weak shrug and pushed the plate infront of Clint, “You can finish it if you want.” 

He was about to take a bite of your half-eaten one when Wanda pushed it away mid-air, a red glow forming around it. 

“If Y/N’s sick, you don’t wanna catch that.” She him chided lightly. 

“Who said Im sick?” You looked over to her as you began to walk out from the kitchen, “I just happened to leave some food unfinished, that doesn’t mean Im sick, does it?” You said grumpily as you left. 

Wanda shook her head and shrugged at the others before following you out into the corridor, jogging up so she could walk aside you, following your lead as you made your way towards the lounge. 

“Mind if I tag along?” She asked politely, “You really don’t seem yourself today, did something happen with you and Nat? You’re normally buzzing with excitement every time she comes home.” 

“Nothing happened Wands,” You stopped walking, suddenly sneezing down into your hand, “I can't wait for her to come home obviously. Im just a little tired or something.” 

Wanda blessed you but gave you an uneasy look, she didn’t believe you but seeing how you’d gotten irritated at Clint earlier, she didn’t want to accidently annoy you. 

You and Wanda made your way into the lounge, settling on opposite sofas. You pulled a blanket around yourself, your hoodie doing little to keep you warm. You let Wanda pick something to watch, you didn’t really care, all you wanted was something to take your mind off the mind-numbing ache in your head. 

“Is Brooklyn-Nine-Nine alright?” She asked as she browsed through Netflix. 

“I don’t mind.” You sniffled, burying your head into the blanket as you coughed deeply, the noise causing Wanda to look over at you with worried eyes.

“You sound terrible.” She said as the intro to the series began to play.

 Looking up at her, it was obvious she was concerned, “Just something in my throat.” You grumbled, your voice coming out in crackled, raspy words rather than a flowing sentence, “Its fin- h- Hh'tshhiEW!” 

Wanda wordlessly got up and picked up the box of tissues from the coffee table in the centre of the living room and placed them firmly next to you, ignoring your glare. You couldn't help but feel weak, if you couldn’t hide your little cold from Wands, how on earth were you meant to hide it from Natasha.  

You and Wanda sat in silence for 2 episodes before you felt your nose begin to run causing you to begin sniffling repeatedly, it was then that you found yourself being thankful for her prior act, taking 2 tissues to blow your nose, you mentally thanked her, giving her a brief smile. 

Wanda looked over to you, she’d heard your thoughts and gave you a kind reassuring smile. 

You didn’t know it, but you were slowly falling asleep, your eyes growing heavier by the minute. You looked up to the clock on the wall, it was almost 12PM, meaning Nat would be home in afew hours. You yawned, maybe you’d just close your eyes for a minute... 

~~ ~~ 

Stepping off the Quinjet, Natasha could barely contain herself, finally she’d be able to see you! She didn’t waste any time, leaving the Quinjet loaded and her bags at the exit. She could clean up later, she had to see you first. 

She practically jogged down the halls towards your bedroom, expecting to find you waiting for her. 

“Im home bab-” She called out but stopped, realising the room was empty, she did notice how tidy it looked though, well except the random towel in the middle of the floor, but apart from that the room was almost spotless. 

Nat stopped to think for a moment before realising you were probably with the other Avengers, she said hello to Clint as she poked her head into the kitchen, scanning the room for you. 

“They’re with Wanda, in the lounge.” Clint called, answering her unasked question as he wiped down the countertops, cleaning up after himself. 

Nat thanked him before actually jogging towards the living room, she swung the door open and smiled seeing both you and Wanda sitting on the sofas. 

She was about to call out to you but stopped, seeing Wanda put a finger to her lips. She stood up and came over to Nat, pulling her outside. 

“What's up?” Nat asked, visibly confused at the witch’s actions. 

“I thought you should know, Y/N’s sick, they sounded dreadful earlier. They fell asleep about 3 hours and have barely moved an inch.” She explained, “Im glad you’re back though, how was it?” 

“It was alright, I missed everyone though.” Nat smiled and hugged her friend, “Thanks for telling me about Y/N too.”  

“Don't mention it.” Wanda smiled and left to go do something, allowing Nat to greet you privately. 

Natasha came back into the lounge, carefully coming to kneel infront of the sofa you were asleep on, “Hey baby.” She whispered, as she softly stroked your cheek, she recoiled her hand, instantly alarmed at the heat radiating from your face, “Wakey, wakey sweetie.” 

It took some more love from Nat before you slowly began to wake up, moaning softly as your eyes adjusted to the light in the room, you rubbed your wrist against your eyes as the image of Nat came into focus. 

“Did you have a nice nap baby?” She asked, helping you sit up. 

“Natty.” Your voice cracked as you spoke, sending you into a small fit of deep coughing. Only this time you had Nat to softly rub her hand down your back, “Sorry, something got caught in my throat there, when did you get back?” 

“About 10 minutes ago, when did you get sick?” She raised her eyebrow at you as you woozily stood up, quickly offering her arm out to support you. 

“What do you mean?” You asked, resisting the urge to sniffle. If there was anytime you needed your acting abilities to be flawless, it was now. You had a pretty rocky start but you could still make up for it.  

Nat gave you a curious look, “Wanda said you were sick?” Her words came as more of a question then a statement. 

“Oh.” You feigned surprise as you tried to discreetly clear your throat, “Well Im fine, never better.” You flashed her a small forced smile.  

‘Fine’ is probably the most misused word in the whole of the English language, you most certainly were not fine, even as you stood still it felt as if the room was spinning around, you but you did your best to act as if nothing was wrong. 

Now Natasha knew you were lying, it was obvious from your appearance alone, your eyes were tired and glassy, not to mention both your cheeks and nose were tinged red. But still, she was impressed at your perseverance, maybe that was why she went along with your scheme. She wanted nothing more than to wrap you up in her hands with tissues and a blanket but she just wanted to see how long it’d take for you to give in. 

“Maybe Wanda was wrong then.” Nat smiled at you knowingly, “You wanna go out for drinks later?” 

 You wanted to cry, you wanted nothing more than to go out for drinks with Nat but you knew there’d be no way you’d be going, “Sure, sounds nice, Im really happy you’re home ‘Tasha. I missed you so so mu-” Your trailed off, feeling the ever-present tickle in your nose grow. Not now. 

“Hhu’tshhiew! Hep’TSHHIEW!”  

“Oh bless you, my love.” Nat cooed, holding back the plethora of concerned words which were about to tumble from her mouth, “I thought you said you weren't sick?” 

“Im not,” You stammered, quickly rubbing the sleeve of your hoodie against your nose, “It was just two -Hh- rando- Hh'iishiew!- random sneezes, its nothing.” You sniffled wetly, reaching for the box of tissues which was still sat on the sofa behind you. 

Natasha was stuck. Her heart broke seeing you sick but she really was curious how long you would deny it for, she thought for a moment, if you got any of worst then she’d take matters into her own hands. 

“Have you eaten yet?” You asked, even through your fever, her welfare was still at the top of your mind. 

“No, but I could use a drink though.” She fibbed, hearing the rasp behind your voice, it was clear you needed water. 

“M’Kay, we should go get you one then.” You mumbled, linking your arm with hers as you both left the lounge to go to the kitchen. 

Entering the kitchen, you let yourself sit down on one of the stools at the island as Nat grabbed two glasses from the cupboards, pouring water into each. 

“Here baby.” She said lovingly, sliding it over to you. 

You thanked her and drank it, the cool water feeling amazing against the burning of your throat, “Did you already unpack?” 

“Not yet,” She replied, sipping her water, “I’ll do it later.” 

“You need a hand?” You offered, praying she’d decline your offer, you really weren't too confident in your lifting abilities at the moment. 

“Aw thanks baby but I think I’ll be okay.”  

You sat silently, waiting for Nat to finish her water when you started sniffling, feeling your nose begin to run again. You eyed up the tissues on the counter opposite, but grabbing them would be an instant sign to Nat that something was wrong so you opted for trying to discreetly rub your nose against your hoodie. 

However, the action only seemed to irritate your nose further, sending an intense tingle to the bridge of your nose. 

“Hh’k-tshhiew! Heh’iiishiew! Hh..H..HHitsshiew!” 

“Bless you, bless you!” She exclaimed, her worry slipping into her tone as she spoke, “You need a tissue?” 

You nodded, as you swiped a handful from the box which she offered out to you. You blew your nose softly, though it did little to ease your discomfort. You sighed, fanning your hand infront of your face, feeling that familiar warmth from earlier that morning come over you again. 

You tried to ignore it, but it slowly became unbearable, you raised your arms, pulling off the cotton hoodie, revealing your black sports bra. 

Natasha looked over you, puzzled, before noticing that your fever-flushed cheeks had darkened further. Right. This had gone too far now. 

She firmly pressed her palm to your forehead without warning, letting out a string of curses in Russian as she felt your raging fever. 

“Shit, Y/N. You feel like a furnace. Enough, I know you’re sick, I’ve known the whole time, it's gone too far now.” 

What? Her words barely formed coherent sentences in your foggy mind, how did she know? You’d hidden it so well. Small beads of sweat began to form and run down your hot skin and you groaned in discomfort, longing for her love. 

“Natty-” You spluttered off into a series of deep coughs, your chest convulsing as you coughed down into your elbow. Natasha had rushed to your side and began running circles down your back, slowly helping you regain your breath. 

“Baby I don’t feel good.” 

“I know sweetie, I know.” Nat kissed your cheek before grabbing a tissue to wipe your running nose, “You need to get into bed, come on.” 

You nodded and opened her hand out towards you. 

You stood and the world span around you, your peripheral vision fading black suddenly as your knees buckled under yourself and you felt the weight of gravity pull you down. You thought you were going to hit the ground when sudden you felt yourself being lifted upwards. Natasha’s fast reaction had allowed her to slip one arm beneath your knees and another behind your back, safely catching you in her arms as you lifted you up in the bridal position. 

She held you for a moment before releasing a deep exhale, “Jesus Y/N. You scared the shit out of me, don’t ever do that again,” She brought her head and pressed it softly against yours, “Poor baby, you’ve been so strong but we need to get you to bed now, okay?” 

You nodded woozily, Natasha continued to whisper sweet nothings to you as she carried you, her strong arms supporting you. Your eyes fell closed for a moment and the next thing you knew, you were being lowered down onto your bed, Natasha’s anxious green eyes looking down at you. 

“I guess we’re not going out for drinks then?” Your words were mumbled but you saw her give a slight smirk at your humour. 

“No baby, we’ll go out when your well.” 

“Sorry your first day back was so eventful, I wanted you to be able to relax.” You sighed, with a damp sniffle, rubbing your nose against the blanket which Nat had pulled over you. 

“You’re okay baby, you’ve done so much today. You just need to relax yourself, just lay here. That fever of yours is no joke, you need to rest.” 

Natasha opened your drawer, seeing if you had a thermometer at hand, what she wasn’t expecting to see though was her letters, “You kept these?” She asked, her eyes prickled with tears. She hadn't expected you to keep them, her mission had been hard and seeing her letters only reminded her of how much she’d missed you. 

“They remind me of you so I wanted to keep them.” Your words were slurred but she understood you anyway. 

She honestly wasn’t sure why she thought you wouldn’t keep them. Seeing them lit a little flame in her heart, she leant down to your side and planted a soft kiss on your lips, “I’ll never leave you again baby, okay? Im here.” 

You muffled another deep cough into the blanket as Nat regained her composure, wiping the tears from the corners of her eyes. She came and slid into bed beside you, sitting upright. You shuffled backwards so you were laying on her, your head on her chest, listening to the steady beating of her heart as she softly ran her hand through your hair. 

“Everything’s gonna be okay.” 

[builtbybrokenbells]

Spitfire | iii

Jake still can’t seem to get the girl from the bar off his mind, even after his time in Baltimore was long forgotten to everyone else. He spends his free time getting to know her, realizing quickly that she’s everything he’s dreamed of. She makes fast at showing him that not everyone is interested in him solely for the fame, but he’s still puzzled at how she pushed him to the brink of falling in love with her in only a mere few weeks.

Read part two here

Read part four here

Pairing: jake kiszka x f!reader

Word count: 5.3k

Warnings: university exams/exam season (🤢), drinking, smoking (weed & cigarettes), long distance, annoying brotherly activities, fluff, mentions of provocative text messages, not really a whole lot w this one, but sorry if i missed any!

hi! here’s part three :) this is mostly a filler to advance to the main story, but i wanted to throw in some long distance fluffiness because i love hurting my own feelings! lots of dialogue to set the scene/relationship/emotion. as always, enjoy, and please be kind and ignore any grammar mistakes 🫶🏻🫶🏻 also disclaimer I am no longer a science student at university so some of the science-y stuff may not be perfectly accurate, no hate pls

~

An incoming call shook you from your focus, your eyes quickly darting down at your phone to see who it was from. You removed your glasses for a moment, rubbing your eyes to wake yourself up. When you put them back on, you noticed that Jake was the one causing the disturbance. A small smile crossed your lips as you picked your phone up, swiping across the screen to accept the video call. His face appeared after a few seconds, a beaming grin plastered on his cheeks. His hair was damp, likely from him showering after the concert he’d just had. A few hours earlier, he promised he’d call when he got back to the hotel, and it wasn’t like Jake to forget a promise.

“Hello, beautiful.” He said before you had a chance to greet him. You let out a small laugh, clicking the lamp on that was sitting on your computer desk. You placed your phone against the screen of your laptop, propping it up so you didn’t have to hold it.

“Hello, handsome.” You greeted back. “But, I am far from beautiful right about now.” You dismissed him, taking your hair down from its messy bun and putting it back up, neater this time. “I think this paper is going to kill me.” You truly meant it. You were in the midst of writing your final thesis paper for your undergraduate degree. After doing a research credit all year long, the paper proved the most difficult of the whole process.

“I think you’re going to ace it.” He said, taking a seat on the hotel bed. “What’s it on, anyway? You never actually told me.” He was right; you’d been working on it the entire time you’d known him, but never dived into the specifics with him, too afraid of talking his ear off about your year-long journey.

“Um,” you gave a small chuckle, pulling out your draft report. “The study of blood-glucose measurement based on blood resistivity.” You muttered the title before tossing the book of paper back down. His eyes widened a bit, trying to process what you were saying, but he covered it up quickly with a supportive nod.

“I love it when you talk science to me.” He sighed, a note of humour radiating from him. You let out a giggle, happy he’d called to ease the tension between you and your work. “But, you know, could you give me a refresher on what exactly that means?” He asked, leaning back against his headboard. You noticed he was shirtless, feeling a small flutter in your stomach at the sight.

“You mean to tell me you can’t tell me all about a diabetic study based off voltage and curve fitting?” You asked, an incredulous look in your eye. He laughed, giving a shrug.

“I’m a bit rusty.” You admired his features, how beautiful he looked when he was happy. You also noticed he looked tired himself, his eyes drooping slightly.

“I’ve been doing a research credit for my degree. I read a study about something similar way back in high school and it stuck with me, because my father’s side of the family struggles with diabetes. My dad and two of my brothers have Type 1. I decided to take a deeper look into it for my thesis.” You explained. He gave you his full attention, humming an agreement to assure you he was listening. “But basically what I’m doing is experimenting to see if we can measure a persons blood-sugar level in a non-invasive way. I studied pulses with electrodes and compared the voltage to different blood-sugar levels on a curve to see if it’s a suitable way to calculate it.”

“Did it work?” He asked, genuinely intrigued.

“Well, sort of.” You scratched your head, furrowing your eyebrows slightly, trying to find the best way to explain it. “There’s definitely a correlation, and I think if it was studied further, it could genuinely get somewhere. It would be pretty cool if it did. Blood-sugar level tests are extremely troublesome in general. They take time, they’re painful, and super expensive in the long run. I know my family spent thousands of dollars on Will and Sam when they were kids, and we had good insurance. It was really interesting to look at. I’m glad I picked it, but almost seven months of study is a lot to compile into one report.” You chuckled. “It’s required to be 40-60 pages long.”

“I think you’re a genius,” he said as a matter-of-fact “and I know that whatever you put down on that paper is going to be fantastic.” He assured you. You gave him a smile, appreciating his words.

“I can only be so much of a genius with a recycled idea,” you reminded, sitting up in your chair. “But I’m almost done the bulk of the work now, so I can forget about it soon enough.”

“When is it due?” He questioned.

“Friday.” You sighed, looking at your calendar. “Three days to go and I’m officially done.”

“See? That’s not so bad. I’ll read it when you’re finished and tell you how amazing it is. I probably won’t understand any of it, but I do know how to give you a compliment.” He flashed the smile that you’d been missing so much. And he was right, he sure did know how to compliment you. It was his favourite pastime, even when you looked as run down as you did in that moment.

“And I would be more than delighted to share it with you.” You watched him again, more interested in him than you’d ever been in your schoolwork. “Anyway, enough about me. How’d your show go, rockstar?”

“I don’t think I can ever get enough of you,” the cheesy line was accompanied by a goofier grin. You rolled your eyes, both of you knowing you weren’t really annoyed with him. “It was good. The crowds are always amazing. We played really well, but I am tired though.”

“Of course you are; it’s hard work to put on a good show.” You sympathized. You could tell how much he loved what he did, but he was always exhausted when he called you at night, which was a common occurrence. He’d been gone for almost two weeks, now, and if he absolutely could not call you during the day, he texted as much as he could. Communication was never ceased, in turn, never leaving you wondering if he meant everything he’d told you. It only took him the length of the plane ride to use your number after he left, claiming he didn’t stop thinking of you once while he was flying away from you. Now, the end of your semester was quickly approaching, which meant the end of your bachelor studies as well.

The day you’d so conveniently ran into him at the coffee shop had sparked a beautifully blossoming relationship. That evening, both went back to your house, where he’d met your roommates (well, officially, at least) and you all had dinner together. You’d given him the house tour he’d been so eager for, and eventually you went back to his hotel with him. Much to everyone’s disbelief, it was completely PG the whole night, aside from a few kisses. You’d met his brothers, spent some time with them and were lucky enough to get to know them, even if it wasn’t much past the surface level. You and Jake spent the night talking, listening to music and really getting past the superficialities.

Not once did he make an advance, proving to you even further that he meant what he’d told you. You shared a bed with him night, falling asleep wrapped in each others arms with no intent for sex or any other hidden implications. It was something you’d never experienced before. When you woke, you got breakfast together. You went with him to the airport to see him off, and he’d kissed you. That’s where the intimacy ended. Now, you had to see him through a phone screen or a camera, always aching to be held by him again. It was the most peace you’d ever known from another person.

You were still nervous, finding it hard to integrate another person into your daily routine in such a way, but the process was made so much easier because of the type of person he was. He was understanding of your timidity, always kind and gentle, he was quick with his words and they were always sweet, and he was gorgeous. Making Jake a part of your every day life had been easier than anything you’d ever done. Nothing was official; it was mostly just phone calls and texting, even if it was constant. A lot of it was innocent, asking about each others days, or mindless chatter that you would never bother to share with anyone else. No matter what you had to say, he always seemed to want to listen. Occasionally, the flirting would take over. He was usually very respectful, he didn’t like to initiate until he knew you were okay with it, but every now and then, he’d send a risky text or picture first. Nothing too graphic, just enough to let you know he was thinking about you. You’d never admit it, but they were some of your favourite texts to receive. Sometimes you would send one first, particularly when it was a bad time for him, just to be an asshole.

You were still processing the entire situation. You’d never been in a relationship or a ‘situationship’, as some say, without it starting with sex, or at least the intent of only having sex. It was nice, knowing him so well before he knew you so intimately. The emotional intimacy felt way nicer than any physical gratification you could imagine. You felt yourself really falling for Jake, despite being so evasive of the idea when you first met him. You truly felt like he was someone you could love, or he was someone who could love you like you’d always wanted.

“When is your ceremony?” He asked. Your eyes shot up to the screen, breaking out of your thoughts.

“Uh, what, sorry?” You cleared your throat, feeling a bit embarrassed for zoning out.

“Your graduation ceremony?” He asked again, not bothered by having to repeat himself.

“Oh,” you looked at your calendar again, eyes tracking the days. There was a big red circle with the word ‘freedom’ scribbled in it. You chuckled to yourself, remembering when Eve had written it. She was over the moon for you when you submitted your credits for review to graduate. She was taking her degree slow, likely to finish in five years rather than four. Knowing that you would still be there with her while she finished, or that she wouldn’t have to leave you behind when she moved away, made both of you relieved beyond measure. “The 24th.” You clarified.

“I have a show that day.” His voice was sad. You felt a bit of disappointment at his words, but you understood. Besides, you’d only known him for a couple weeks; you couldn’t expect him to drop everything to go to your graduation when he barely knew you.

“That’s okay.” You assured him. “I didn’t expect you to go anyway.” You realized how harsh your words sounded after they came out. A solemn look fell across his features. “No, Jake, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that.” You rushed out. “I just meant that we’ve only been talking for a few weeks. I would never expect you to drop your whole life to come and see my ceremony.”

“You say that like you’re not important to me.” He said, fidgeting with something behind the screen.

“I know I am, Jake.” You assured him. “And you’re important to me, too. I just know that life is busy. Especially for you, rockstar.” A small smile tugged at the corner of his lips.

“Maybe Eve will be generous enough to do a video call with me.” He suggested. You nodded, thinking that wasn’t a bad idea at all.

“I’ll have to ask her, but I’m sure she would. I think she likes you.” He let out a small laugh.

“Well that’s good, I guess.” His attention was disrupted by a knock on his door. “Hold on,” he mumbled, getting out of the bed. He continued holding the phone, not wanting to miss a moment of time talking to you. You heard his hotel door open, only being able to see his shoulder on the camera.

“Hello, brother.” You heard a voice say. You could recognize it as Josh’s. He’d joined your calls a fair few times over the last few weeks, just the same as Danny and Sam. You were slowly getting to know all of the boys, which was really making you feel like Jake was serious about this whole thing. “Care to partake?” You heard a laugh fall from Jake, warming your heart. You were certain that it had become your favourite sound in the whole world.

“Yeah, but she has to join, too.” Jake informed his brother.

“Oh, is that y/n?” Josh asked, his excitement growing. “Actually, I don’t think I even have to ask.”

“Hi, Josh!” Your voice echoed from the phone. You saw a struggle on the screen, hearing muffled bumps and noises, until eventually Josh’s smiling face popped into view.

“Hey, mama.” You could hear Jake arguing with his brother, trying to get his phone back. Josh seemed to be walking down the hallway, now, away from his twin. You couldn’t help but giggle at the interaction. “You wanna get drunk with us?” He asked. You eyed your laptop screen, internally debating if you should or not.

“You know, you guys are awfully bad influences.” You teased.

“Is that a yes?” You could see Jake approaching in the background of the camera, now. Josh raised his eyebrow at you in anticipation. He was still evading Jake, picking up his speed as he ran away from him.

“Josh, don’t pressure her into it.” Jake scolded. He sounded far away, you could barely make out what he was saying. You were having a hard time holding back your laughs, now. The whole situation was perfectly comedic and seemed to be exactly what you needed to feel better.

“Yeah, I’d love to, Josh.” You agreed. He let out a triumphant noise, halting his movement completely. Jake finally reached him, grabbing his phone back. You finally lost control of your laughter when you saw his grumpy expression appear in the frame. “Hi, honey.” You joked through bouts of giggles, wiping away a tear that had fallen.

“I’m glad you think he’s funny,” Jake tried to sound annoyed, but he was failing miserably, unable to stay upset while seeing you so happy. “Try being around him all of the time.”

“Oh come on, he’s not that bad.” You comforted, catching your breath.

“You have no idea.” He grumbled, making his way back to his hotel room. Josh appeared behind him, holding a liquor bottle in his hand. You stood yourself, throwing a hoodie on over your tank top. Jake watched you silently, admiring you. He thought you were the most beautiful girl he’d ever seen, even when you were doing the most mundane tasks. You grabbed your cigarette pack from the desk and slipped it into the pocket. “Are you sure you want to stay on the phone? I can let you go, I know you have work to do.” The concern was dripping from his words.

“I’m okay, I want to talk to you guys. I wasn’t getting much work done, anyway. I think I just have to take a break, start fresh tomorrow.” You were lying, but only slightly. Your work was not going fantastic, but you were making progress. Still, you’d rather put the last bit of your report off until tomorrow if it meant you got to spend time with Jake, even if it was virtual.

“Okay, if you’re sure.” Jake said, a note of warning in his tone.

“She wants to hang out with us, Jake. Don’t convince her to change her mind.” You could practically hear Josh’s eye roll in his statement.

“What, I’m not- you know what? Get out.” Even as he said it, there was a smile on his face and a ghost of a laugh in his voice. You thought it was sweet, how close the two boys were. Twin thing aside, they really were best friends. They knew each other better than anyone else, and they were always functioning on the same wavelength. Even when they were mad at each other, they were never really mad.

Almost nightly you’d see an appearance from Josh in your FaceTimes with Jake. He’d instantly added you on his personal social media’s, wanting to know you just as bad as Jake did, but for a different reason. You remembered back to a few days after they left, how Josh had sent you a message telling you that ‘if Jake talked so highly about you, he had to know you, too’. The instant acceptance was heartwarming. The boys reminded you of your own brothers. You were excited for them all to meet, eventually. They’d talked on the phone a few times, but you couldn’t wait for them to all be together and really know each other.

Just as you were exiting your room, your phone began to vibrate again. A grin pulled at your lips. Your brother Sam was calling, too. “Hold on, guys.” You said, clicking the hold button on your current call and answering the video from your sibling. “Hello, spawn of Satan.” You greeted as soon as the call connected.

“I’m really starting to question if you love me or not.” He shot back. You chuckled.

“Oh, I do love you, brother dearest, but it’s because I have to.” You teased. “Hold on, I’m on the phone with Jake. I’m going to merge it.” You informed him. He gave a nod. You clicked into the other call, pressing the merge button. Within a moment, the screen was shared between Jake and Sam. It took Jake a moment to realize what happened, but when he did, his eyes lit up.

“It’s other Sam!” He said. Your brother cracked a smile, probably larger than any one he’d ever given you.

“What’s up, rockstar?” Sam asked. Josh peeked his head into view, not wanting to miss out on any of the conversation. “Twin rockstars!” Jake and Josh got a chuckle out of it. You’d instantly told Sam about Jake, calling him right after you got home from the airport. Sam, being a nosy little shit, did a deep dive of him on all social media’s. Within a few days, all of your brothers knew about him, and were begging you to let them meet him. So, you thought you’d ease the transition by allowing them on a few of your calls with him. Sam had taken to him immediately, especially upon learning he also had a brother named Sam. According to him, it was fate that you and Jake ended up together. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think he wanted to date Jake, too.

“Glad I’m so easily forgettable.” You rolled your eyes, making your way down the hallway and into the kitchen. Ally was sitting at the table with a bowl of soup and her laptop in front of her. She looked like she’d been crying, staring down her final assignment with a look of disdain on her face. Exam season always put a damper on the household mood. You walked over and gave her a supportive shoulder pat, knowing you were close to the same mental state. Sam found himself chatting away with the other two boys, completely ignoring your comment, which only proved your point further. “M’going outside, if you wanna join.” You told her. She shook her head, barely being able to formulate words.

“I have to finish this.” She groaned, relaxing into her chair. “Due tomorrow.”

“Stuck?” You asked, peering down at her screen. She nodded. You gazed at the question that was left answerless, the last one on the page. “Is this Calc III?” She gave a nod. “Okay, where’s your work for it so far?” She pointed out a paragraph.

“I just can’t seem to get the numbers to work out.” She let out a long sigh, throwing her pencil down on the table. You looked over it for a minute, studying the numbers she was using.

“Okay, it’s a relation between a flux and a line integral, right?”

“Yeah, it is.” You turned the volume down on your phone a bit, not wanting to distract her while the boys talked.

“You remember the unit where you talked about the three main integral theorems?” She gave a hum, seeming to get what you’re saying. “One of those has an equation that will solve this question. And you’ll need to remember it for the exam, too, because there’s a couple questions about it.” You told her. She looked like she was wracking her brain for an answer, desperate to remember what you were talking about. After a moment, it seemed to click.

“Stoke’s theorem!” She exploded, catching the attention of all of the boys on the phone call. She noticed the lack of noise, a blush rising to her cheeks. You held up your hand for a high-five, helping her forget about her outburst. “Thank you.” She whispered.

“No problem,” you assured her “now, if you want to join, I will be outside getting fucked up. I am trying to forget about my thesis.” She let out a small laugh.

“How many pages?” She asked.

“I am on page 51, if you must know. Nearly there!” You cheered yourself on. “I should be able to finish it tomorrow.” You went to the fridge, grabbing a bottle of wine and a container of cut up fruit someone had bought at the grocery store.

“I believe in you.” She said, turning back to her laptop. “I might be out in a bit. I haven’t seen Eve all day. Not sure if she’s alive or not, so I’ll have to check on her first.” You saw Sam perk up at the mention of Eve’s name. He probably hadn’t heard from her, either. She was fully immersed in studying, more so than anyone else. She took her exams extremely serious. With a smaller course load, she wanted to ensure her marks were as best as they could be. You were proud of her for it. She worked really hard, but you did miss her presence during exam weeks.

“Saw her this morning drinking orange juice from the bottle, haven’t seen her since.” You informed her. The two of you shared a laugh. “She’s alive, just in hermit mode.”

You parted ways, opening the front door after putting on a pair of slippers. You moved over to the patio chairs placed around a table on the porch. It was a closed porch with large glass windows and another door leading to the street. You thought it was peaceful, finding it your favourite spot in the whole house. You sat down, resting your feet on the table. You pulled out a joint and a cigarette from the cardboard box in your pocket. “What did I miss?” You asked them, now focusing on your screen again.

“We were actually just talking about how much we hate you,” Sam said, a hint of fake sympathy accompanying his words.

“Mmhmm,” you mumbled, joint now between your lips and your lighter setting the tip ablaze. You took a large inhale, the cherry glowing red in the dim lighting. A billow of smoke flowed from your mouth as you exhaled. Almost instantly, you felt the tension melt off your shoulders. Josh seemed positively buzzed, his cheeks burning red and his smile never leaving. Sam looked as though he was ready for bed, eyes heavy and bloodshot. You were sure he’d been high for hours. Jake was sipping a drink silently, but his eyes never seemed to move from the camera.

“Alex and I are flying in Friday morning.” Sam said. Your eyes lit up, a course of adrenaline flowing through your veins.

“Really?” He gave a nod.

“Yeah, we decided to come early, spend some with with you before mom and dad got there. I think our flight leaves here at five.” He explained. “So you better have all of your shit done, because we want to party.” He warned.

“It will be, don’t worry.” You promised. “I think I’ll have my report done by tomorrow. I just have to type the conclusion and my entire novel of sources.” You chuckled to yourself, looking down at the joint between your fingers. “I’ll get Ally to proofread it; she said she would a few days ago. After that, I’m a free woman.” You announced, feeling proud of yourself for getting this far.

After that, the chatter died down. Sam eventually hung up, telling everyone he was tired and wanted to go to bed. You bid your goodbye, already feeling the anticipation begin for his arrival. You and the twins continued on with mindless conversation, sipping away at your drinks. When you cigarette pack was down to the last three, and the bottle of wine was threatening the end, Josh was ready to retire for the night, too. He was dozing off in Jake’s bed every so often, a small snore falling from his mouth periodically. You were caught up in Jake, not caring that the rest of the company had dwindled down. He was exhausted but still immersed in your conversations about nothing, and everything.

It wasn’t too long before Josh stumbled away to his own hotel room. He gave a solemn goodnight, telling you that he wished you were there with them, before he toddled away. Your cheeks were warm in the cool night air, the liquor and weed weighing heavily on you, but not any more than your tiredness.

When Jake settled into bed under the covers, as much as sleep wanted to become him, he couldn’t bring himself to close his eyes. “Are you going to bed, beautiful?” He mumbled. You couldn’t help but giggle to yourself. He was barely formulating the words, head buried so deep in the pillow you could hardly see him anymore.

“I think you probably should.” You told him, concern becoming you. “We can talk tomorrow, rockstar.”

“Don’t want to,” he mumbled “just want you here with me.” Your heart ached, hating to admit to yourself that you felt the same way.

“I know, I do too.” You finally mustered out. As much as you enjoyed talking with Jake, and as aware as you were about your feelings for him, the opening up part was proving quite difficult. You had no problem with the flirting, or the endless conversations, or even the sex talk, but telling him how you truly felt was troublesome. You weren’t sure if it was because you were scared of rejection, or because you were just scared of falling in love with him. “I miss you.” You whispered.

“I miss you too, beautiful.” He seemed more alert now, energized by the fact you’d made that proclamation first, this time.

“When can I see you again?” You picked at some frayed strings on your pants, avoiding looking at him.

“Soon, I promise. Once you finish school, I’ll take you around the world with me.” His smile brought your attention back to him. You found it impossible to look anywhere else. Your chest burned at his statement, wondering if he was being truthful or not.

“You mean it?”

“Never meant anything more in my life.” He assured you. “I hate sleeping alone, now, ‘cause I know what it’s like to sleep next to you.” You stood to go back inside, butting out your last cigarette of the night before entering through the front door and locking it behind you. You didn’t answer him until you were in your bedroom with the door closed.

“Don’t make promises you don’t mean, rockstar.” You took off your sweater and your pants, climbing into bed. The alcohol was buzzing through your veins, making your head feel a bit fuzzy. You were more than ready for bed.

“I’ve never told you anything I didn’t mean, baby.” The pet name rolled off his tongue so effortlessly, like he was meant to call you that all along, but it hit you with such an impact that you were sure it had stopped your heart for a moment. He’d called you plenty of other names, more in a compliment context, but such a domestic title was something very new. He didn’t even notice the effect it had on you; he was laying there with his eyes closed, phone only showing half of his face in the frame. When you didn’t answer, he opened one of his eyes to see what was going on. “I’m sorry, did that bother you? I wasn’t thinking,” he rushed out.

“No, Jake. It’s okay.” You reassured him. “I liked it.” A small smile creeped onto his face. You couldn’t help but return it. “I think I’m falling for you, rockstar.” You breathed after a moment too long.

“I already have, witchy woman.” His eyes were open again, watching the blush spread across your cheeks. That was the best way he could say it, because he was afraid he’d already fallen in love with you. He was glad he could at least tell you a sliver of what he was feeling for you. “I can’t wait to see you again.”

“Soon,” you said, curling up into your blankets.

“Can we stay on the phone tonight?” He asked. “I don’t want to hang up.”

“Yeah, I’d like that a lot.” You turned over, plugging your phone into the charger. You set your phone on your nightstand, propped up against a book so he could see you. He shuffled around, doing the same thing. This wasn’t the first time you’d fallen asleep with him on the phone. You hadn’t done it in a few days, though. It was nice. When the days permitted, sometimes you even got to wake up to him before he had to go. He usually waited as long as he could before hanging up so he could at least try to say good morning. If you were awake first, you did the same. You really enjoyed the little routines you two had been building together.

You both settled into your beds, rustling in the pillows and blankets to find the comfiest position. You watched your phone, wanting to soak in every second of seeing his face. “Goodnight, beautiful.” He mumbled, sleep calling to him. “Sleep well, I’ll see you in the morning.” He said it as if it were a promise.

“Goodnight, rockstar.” You whispered. His eyes fluttered closed as he bit his tongue, holding back any other words. The ‘L’ word was always so dangerously close to slipping out of his mouth. He felt so stupid, wanting to say ‘I love you’, when he’d only known you for a few weeks, but he felt like he really did. He’d never met anyone else who made him feel like you did, and it started from the minute he saw you.

Before you closed your own eyes, they drifted to the wall behind your computer desk. The record sleeve of one of Jake’s albums stood so beautifully prominent, his signature illuminated by your desk lamp. Your gaze lingered over the sharpie marks, stomach fluttering at the memory of him writing it. You fell asleep with a smile, already excited to wake up to him in the morning.

~

Tag list: @gvfpal @jakesgrapejuice

[cunninghamchrissie]

can we all just get along or at the very least ignore each other pls i’m so tired i’m so anxious i’m so upset. i signed up to ship two fictional characters in my spare time not to worry abt cliques and popularity contests and bullying and doxxing and suicide!!!!! pls god i’m desperate

whatever mistakes i’ve made i’m sorry, i’m sorry if i was ever inappropriate, lashed out, fucked up, treated anyone badly i’m sorry i truly am sorry pls i just want this all to end and for everyone to have fun again, i’ll do anything, i’ll speak to anyone, i’ll atone just pls i can’t handle any of this anymore, how did we even get to this state

[deathlydeathovo]

If You Cry, I'll Cry

TW: self-harm, detailed description of cuts/scars, blood, knives, stained carpet, sorry for any mistakes.

reader has no menitioned gender.

note: currently writing this with hot cheeto fingers, pls pray for my keyboard

note: I am no longer writing with hot cheeto fingers, but I am writing with cramps worse than a limb being ripped off <333

♡♡♡

"I don't even know why I opened my fucking eyes.." You moped around your room. It was unusually messy, for you atleast. Jax had already tried to open the door a couple times with his spare keys, yet you used your body strength to keep his sorry ass out.

"I'm not worthy of breathing."

You walked to the bathroom, and opened the cabinet that stood in front of you. You grabbed a little knife out. "Perfect." You sliced open your skin 5 times, letting the blood drip into the sink. Each plop made a 'doink' sound. The cutting never hurts as much as the washing..

"I'll just get an infection, i don't wanna wash these.."

Your arms were covered from your palm to the end of your forearm, with cuts. They went deep into the skin, making scars that looked like dry skin. you peeled open a dry scab out of boredom. You sighed, letting that drip into the sink as well.

"I'm too fucking tired for this bullshit.."

You walked out of the bathroom, blood staining the carpet of the floor. You got into bed, pulled the blanket over you, and closed your eyes.

--x--

'Jesus.. whats all that racket..?' you thought, opening your eyes. You could hear two people bantering outside, before it stopped. there was a quick twist on your door handle and it creaked open, then you could see Gangle peer through the crack, her hands on the side of the door. "D-darling..?" Gangle looked distressed as she opened the door a little more.

"May I uhm.. Come in?"

You gently smiled despite the pain of the cuts on your arm. Gangle always knew to respect your privacy, but she also knew she couldn't just.. leave you. "Sure, just.. uhm.. stay near the door, please.." You mumbled. Gangle did so, and walked in. She closed the door behind her and locked it.

"You're not okay, Sweetheart.."

Gangle sat on the side of the bed, ignoring your pleas to stay near the door. "And I know this.. I was just too afraid to say anything." You panicked a bit, seeing how close Gangle was from seeing the mess on the floor, and the bed. "Yeah, uh-huh.." You nervously laughed, which it seemed Gangle caught onto that.

"You're.. not hiding anything, are you?"

Gangle's eyes narrowed. She looked.. disappointed. "Why would I hide anything from my beloved..?" you mumbled. Gangle huffed, and got off the side of the bed. She then walked around to the side you were on, and her eyes widened. The blood that stained the carpet was (unfortunately) still visible.. "I-I was just uhm.. hurt a little.. Scraped my knee.." You smiled with a nervousness that could only be described as 'pls dont check pls dont check'. And guess what? Gangle checked. She removed the covers from you, and looked at your legs. She huffed again with even more disappointment.

"Don't you start lying to me.."

Gangle was obviously still worried about you, yet she had to atleast project some annoyance in her voice to tell you how disappointed she is that you were lying. You had your arms up to your chest, but it was only a matter of time before Gangle got suspicious of that. "I'm not hiding anything from you, Love.." Gangle looked at your eyes. "Show me those." She pointed to your arms that were tucked into your chest. "Could you- uh.. tell me what 'those' are?" "Arms. Show me, now." Gangle put her hands on her.. hips? whatever, she was mad. "I said now." You were.. ashamed of yourself now. But, despite being ashamed, you showed her anyways. You brought your arms up from your chest, and you could see where the blood now stained your nightgown. You turned your arms toward her, and mumbled a soft,

"Sorry.."

Gangle's eyes went wide once again, this time with a horrified expression. You could tell she was worried for you, but she also looked like she was gonna vomit. The brownish red scabs from old cuts, and the new ones from earlier, and the red that stained your arms.. it was all disgusting, but expressed a lot. It expressed how much you felt like a failure, or how you felt like you were just empty mass. Gangle's happy mask dropped. It didn't break, but it dropped off onto the floor with a 'clink'. She started to sob, and she took your arms gently into her ribbon hands. "Why..?" Tears fell from Gangle's eyes like a waterfall. Yet after awhile she stopped. This moment was about you.

You could hear Gangle huff.

She sat down next to you, taking your arms in her hands. She softly caressed the wounds, but not with pressure. She just.. Wanted to feel them. "I'm.. sorry I didn't notice it sooner." Gangle's voice was more toned down, and calm. "I truly am sorry." She gently put her 2d mouth onto the cuts, to gesture a kiss. The soft and cold mask touched your skin like you could break at any second. "Ribbon, I'm sorry.." You looked at the celing with guilt plastered on your face. "I should've told you.." Gangle turned her head towards your face. She took one hand off of your arms to turn your face toward her. "I know you probably wouldn't have anyways, so.. don't sweat it. I know I wouldn't wanna tell anyone that I did something bad.." She chuckled, then sighed.

"Is there anything else I should know about?"

You looked at Gangle's eyes. "No.. But.. Can we not talk about this right now..? I just.. It's a lot." You looked away, tears pooling in your eye sockets. Gangle looked at you, then pulled you up off of the bed. "let's wash these off.." Gangle's ribbon hand wrapped around your wrist gently as she guided you to your bathroom.

"It's cold.."

The water ran over your cuts like a soft breeze. It made your arms tremble. Once washed, Gangle patted the cuts with a warm towel to dry them. She wrapped your delicate arms in gauze and tape. Gangle guided you back to the bed, holding you as if you would run off if she didn't. She lied you down, and then climbed into bed with you. "I'm sorry.." Gangle sighed. "there's nothing to be sorry for, Dove.." It was obvious Gangle was having trouble saying the right thing.

"You don't have to say anything.."

Gangle looked at the floor.

"You being here is.. already enough."

taglist: @beesofink

[almightygremlinblob]

In Every Life (AFAB Ver.)

In which Sukuna falls in love with the Reader without realizing it.

Word Count: 5, 283 of slow burn. ⚠️Content Warnings⚠️: Not Beta Read, True Form Sukuna, Heian Era, Sukuna fluff, soft Sukuna, mentioned cannibalism, slight angst, Sunshine AMAB!Reader but gender neutral expressions used, Reader is not a sorcerer and is implied to be the only non-sorcerer of her village. Minors and ppl not okay with anything sexual pls DNI and have a nice day 👍🏽 AMAB!Reader (with gender-neutral pronouns) here

⚠️Further Content Warnings⚠️: Virgin!Sukuna, Sub!Sukuna, Reader and Sukuna both switch from gentle doms to subs, soft & fluffy sex, very messy sex, size difference, Reader makes out with the tummy mouth, squirting, lots of cum, cock worship, lots of fluids in general, belly bulge, lots of mouths, consensual blood drinking, this is getting worse the more I write lmao. THIS IS NOT BETA'D and I am very tired while editing this. SO! If you spot any mistakes, esp. with the body parts of Reader lmao (since I made two of these), pls tell me!

You were happy you managed to catch the attention of the King of Curses.

Sure, you didn't exactly know how you did it. You weren't strong, or exceptionally beautiful like the sons and daughters offered to him. You weren't even that smart!

You were clueless, as a matter of fact!

So clueless that, nearly a month ago, you gave the strange looking man with four arms a warm meal and a place to stay for the night - since it didn't seem like the storm would let up any time soon. He was pretty much shunned by the rest of the village upon his arrival…probably due to the overwhelming energy that sent people into fight or flight…but he was just born different!

Probably.

"What's your name, Mister?"

"…"

You quickly learned that he didn't speak much, and he does not like to be looked at. Only watching as you go about your day - trying your best to navigate through the judgement and, frankly, abuse of the other villagers; ever as judgemental about you as they were likely to talk down on you, spread rumors and try to take advantage of your endless kindness. Not that it worked, though - and for that, everyone pretty much hated you. Despite his silence, your visitor was the only one that seemed to regard you without any ounce of hatred.

Then, one day…

"Why do you entertain them?"

"Ah!" You visibly jumped at that moment - up until now you were certain he couldn't speak. His voice was lovely baritone, but held a quiet authority - much like him…and a very clear evil but you wouldn't dwell too much on that. "M-me? Oh…of course, me…"

"U-um…I'm not entirely sure, actually. I don't like them, b-but…" Those sharp, piercing eyes are distant, scanning the forest as you tried to think of a reason. "I-I guess they're my neighbors. Friends? No. But it wouldn't be right to just outright ignore them."

"Hmph, of course…" He scoffs, and rolls his eyes. "You people and your morals…"

"Do you not have friends?"

"No."

"Oh…" Your shoulders slump slightly. "Then, consider me your first friend!"

"No."

"Oh…"

When you visibly deflate, he laughs lightly, shaking his head as if he's heard something utterly ridiculous. "Why does that bother you? You hardly know me. I could be a mass murderer for all you know."

"Because you…you're…" You think for a while, before finding the right words. "One of the most unique people I've ever had the blessing of meeting."

His eyes finally land on you. "Blessing, huh?"

------

Eventually, the villagers turned violent towards you and your guest, but you did your best to keep him safe - urging him to leave, quickly. It was that day, when you were nearly beaten to death, that you learned the strange man's name.

"Die, you peasant!" There was something in the way these villagers attacked. A strange energy that made it hurt all the more. You were bloodied, bruised and beaten to the point you couldn't even find the strength to scream. A blade was pointed to your throat. "Any last words?"

Despite yourself, you manage to spit at him.

"I didn't think you had it in you." That familiar low voice, low and uninterested, sounds from behind you both. Then, before your very eyes, everyone was somehow cut to pieces. No screams, or cries…just the sounds of flesh and bone being cut apart. You were probably hallucinating...

You see your guest walk beside you - the gore, guts and limbs not affecting him in the slightest.

"Ah, you're okay…" His eyes land on you again. "B-be careful…t-there's an invisible…invisible something that's cutting people up…"

He scoffs. "And if I told you that was me?"

"What."

"Tsk." He promptly grabs you and, without you even realizing, your wounds begin healing, closing up, and suddenly you're more aware than you were a while ago. Then, with the flick of his wrist, the bodies get further chopped apart. The gears in your head start to turn and your eyes widen. "O-oh…"

"Go on, then. Go ahead." He grabs your face, forcing you to look at the disembodied people and the growing river of blood. "Run."

"No. No…" Your breathing steadies, and you relax into his hold. He must sense it with the way his whole body tenses for a moment. "Not from you."

In the silence, you can practically hear him thinking as he gets up. And when he made no move, you realized he was waiting for you. So you got up too, wordlessly, and began to follow him. After a while of silence, he graces you with his voice again - quiet, almost…soft.

"My name is irrelevant…but people call me Sukuna Ryomen, the King of Curses."

------

And that was the start of your new life, as a servant of the King of Curses.

It…wasn't so bad! Sure, you could be killed any day, like a few of the other servants and many of the courtesans, but you also didn't do much! And, best of all, no more of those abusive neighbors! Your days were mainly spent helping the head servant - the attractive one with white hair and a pink splotch - do things for the king, for only up to four hours. Four hours! Then you'd spend the rest of the day doing whatever!

This was not one of those days, however.

Today, you were cleaning the Lord's study, in his chambers, along with the attractive head servant. There were...a strangely high number of Dokudami paintings...

"The Lord seems to have an obsession with this herb. Does he like it?"

"That's an interesting observation. Though you're mistaken. It's more the symbolism of this plant."

"And…that would be?"

"Its flowers are delicate, pure. The plant itself is medicinal against many illnesses - it's endlessly helpful. Kind. But it grows everywhere, even in the places not many grow. A surprising resilience despite it's 'delicate' nature." The head servant explains, and you can hear the tinge of amusement in their voice. "Remind you of anyone?"

"Uh…no? No one comes to mind…"

They simply snort at that.

------

The first time you were called to his chambers, you thought you were going to die. Actually, everyone thought you were going to die. They were all giddy at the thought. You didn't expect to just sit there in silence while he practiced his calligraphy.

"I can hear you thinking. Speak."

You fidget around a little, before getting the words out. "I've always been meaning to ask…why…why me, my Lord?"

He clicks his tongue. "You dare question my choices?"

"N-no! Only…I'm curious."

Sukuna is silent for a while, hand perfectly still as he thinks, before eventually speaking.

"You calm me." He sighs as his brush continues to move. "Somehow, every time, you calm me."

------

The courtesans could see you from outside, and you could practically feel them glaring daggers at you - endlessly furious and envious that you could be that close to the Lord.

"My Lord, you…never seem to show interest in your courtesans. Have they, I mean…" You weren't sure how to word it without coming off as too brash.

"Of course they try to bed me. They always do. Don't even try to hide that they're doing it to gain a semblance of power in my estate. The last two were just…" He waves his hand dismissively, tone making it abundantly clear he wasn't happy with the memory. "Had her head cut off and the second had his limbs strewn on the floor."

You feel his gaze on you, scowl evident in even his voice. "Why do you ask me about this?"

"It's just…you have so many, I thought, well..."

"Tsk. They only want something from me, and they think they can take it freely. From me. Me!"

"Surely not ALL of them…" You fidget a little. "Why would you keep them around if that was? There's…there's so many…"

You can practically hear his smirk. "Because their organs taste GREAT sautéed."

"A-ah…"

He snorts, seeing your discomfort. "Are you afraid of becoming like them?"

"I…hm…" You look up in thought. "Perhaps…"

He lets out a soft laugh. "Then you truly are a fool."

"But…I think, it would be a good sacrifice." You finish the last area, as he goes awfully quiet. "Like an offering to a god. I think…I think I wouldn't mind that."

His presence is more than clear behind you, strong and foreboding. "Do you mean it?"

"Yes."

"Do you trust me?"

"Of course."

"Liar. Everyone says that…" He scoffs. "…but, nobody means it. If given the chance…"

You hear a sound, sharp and strong, much like a blade. A pain blooms from your wrist, and you realize you're bleeding lightly - only a few drops of blood at a time. "They all run."

"No. I wish to stay by your side, my Lord. I have nowhere I'd rather be." When you relax and make no move to run, a big and warm hand engulfs yours.

"You…weren't lying." You feel lips against the wound on your outer wrist, and the swipe of a tongue against it before the wound starts to close. "You fool…"

------

Many in the estate didn't like you, jealous of how close you were to the Lord - but it wasn't everyone. Now, it was everyone. Rumors fueling jealousy and malice for the very obvious favoritism.

Taking little nibbles, you didn't want to take more than your share.

The food was beyond AMAZING. However, Sukuna simply scowls as you shyly keep your head bowed and you must feel his gaze harden by the way you flinch under it.

"I apologize. I just…don't want to take more than my share…"

"Do you mean to insult me? This entire meal is yours." He scoffs, grabbing your bowl. He grabs one of the sushi rolls and puts it against your mouth, which is still closed due to your surprise. "Eat. I won't accept this…whatever it is you're doing."

"O-oh, I-…thank you, my Lord." You open your mouth and allow him to feed you. Light blush forming from how good the food is. Yes, that was definitely why. "My compliments to the chef. This is beyond delicious, my Lord…"

And it was true, the sushi, the miso soup, selection of meats, everything tasted DIVINE.

"Compliments taken."

WAIT-

You nearly choke on your food. "I-I apologize…my Lord. I, you…for me???"

"Use your words."

"I mean, ah…" You shake your head, trying to recover from your mind going into overdrive. "You…made this for me?"

"Yes." He says it so plainly.

"What…what for?"

He doesn't answer and, for once, looks unsure. "I…I don't know."

------

When you came out of his chambers unscathed the second time, everyone - except for Lord Sukuna himself and his servant - went into a frenzy. The servants were appalled, the courtesans were fuming, and you made sure to steer clear of everyone who now seemed to loathe you. And, soon enough, all your duties were either with the head servant, with Lord Sukuna, or by yourself. Still, you didn't feel safe in the estate anymore.

Then, one night, the head servant came to your quarters, stating that "Lord Sukuna has requested I take you to his chambers."

If you weren't going to die physically, you would die of embarrassment.

Still, you followed the white haired servant to his chambers, entire form trembling as you nearly stumbled over yourself. Sukuna glances you once over, and can't help the snort that escapes his lips. You looked like a newly born fawn with how shaky your legs were.

"My sincerest apologies. I just…nervous…"

"That much is clear. Sit." Something is off and you can tell he's tense. "This probably isn't going to go how you're expecting."

You do as he says, sitting seiza in front of him. Something sharp is pointed to your throat, right where the artery is. Your eyes go wide, but after a little bit, you allow your entire body to relax. If you should die by anyone's hand, it would be his.

"Look at me." He commands and you look up, seeing him holding a spear of sorts. For the first time, you see him - truly see him. His form beautiful, terrifying and divine all at once. Your eyes and body must show your adoration, because he looks away - as if uncomfortable.

He shuts his eyes, and the spear is repeatedly pushed against your neck, as if trying. However, it never follows through. This was so easy for him, and yet…

"My Lord, if I should die today, it would be the greatest honor for it to be by your hand." Your body relaxes, eyes close and you lean into the blade of the spear. Sukuna tenses, and you feel it in his hold. "If it's by your hand, my Lord, I can only die happy."

"Yes. That much you've made clear." You hear him sigh, tired and defeated, as the spear drops to the floor. "To think this is how I'd lose…how pathetic…"

"M…my Lord?"

"Leave."

You see him, frustrated and defeated, and it makes your heart ache to see him like this. Without even realizing it, your hand reaches out and stops just before touching him. "Might I stay for you? Please, I only want…"

His glare nearly has you frozen. "THIS is how you want to celebrate a victory over me?"

"No, my Lord. I only wish to stay by your side and help how I can."

He's quiet, clearly upset. "Do what you will with me. I might as well be worthless like this anyway."

"Never to me, Lord Sukuna." You take his hand in both of yours, and bring your lips to his knuckles but he quickly pulls his hand away.

"What?!" He snarls. "What use is your loyalty to someone like me now?"

"You are my Lord, Sukuna. I serve you…" Your eyes meet his, full of longing and concern. "Anything I can do to help you, please let me…"

His eyes briefly glance at your quivering lips, leaning in without realizing before he turns away with a click of his tongue.

"Leave."

And you do as you are told.

------

"How is Lord Sukuna?"

Was one of the most frequent questions you'd pester the head servant's ears with. They roll their eyes. "He's not frail, you know. You don't need to worry about him like a mother hen."

"I just…it's been a week since I've seen him! If he doesn't want to see me, that's fine, but…I-I'd at least like to know if he's okay…" You sigh. "And what I did wrong…so I can avoid doing it again!"

"Just give him time to process." The head servant states nonchalantly. "This is new territory for him."

------

The silence was…

Awkward, to say the least.

Not a word uttered as he continued to paint those stupid edible weeds in the candle-light. It was already late…

"A-ahem." Your voice breaks slightly when you clear your throat, and you feel his gaze on you. "M-my Lord, if there's nothing else, I shall retire for the night."

"Stay."

What.

"Don't make me repeat myself." Clearly your reaction was evident in your body, and you choke on your words before they even get out.

"That night was my first defeat." He says, as if sensing your question, yet you hear a tired and heavy sigh. "As of now, it's been my only one."

"But…have you been okay, my Lord?"

"Always about me, hm?" He scoffs, and there's tension as his footsteps grow closer. Your eyes meet his, beautiful and terrifying, when his fingers gently tug your chin up - guiding you to look at him. Guiding your body to the mattress as he cages you underneath him. "And why not just claim your victory? I have no right to complain. Isn't that what you meant to do the night you defeated me?"

"What? No! My, Lord, no! I-I'm sorry. It wasn't-I didn't mean-It's not what you think! I could never-" Your hands cover your mouth - shocked at the implication. "Oh Lord Sukuna, I bow to you! Only you! I-I will never, could never, force something like that on you! Not then. Not now…"

"Good. This was getting overwhelming." He sighs and then promptly rolls off you, plopping down to your side. Though your skins were still touching and, for once, Sukuna didn't mind someone this close to him in this way. He was relaxed, as if his worries melted away. You couldn't help the smile that grew. This was the Lord you know - a walking death and calamity, now pacified. You both face each other and he can't help but look away, cracking under the weight of your loving gaze - full of adoration, concern and awe.

Weak.

He was weak.

"Lord Sukuna, may I?" Your hand reaches out to him, stopping just before reaching the wooden part of his face. He was so terribly beautiful.

"Do as you wish." He mumbles, and you gently hold him - even though he doesn't show it, you can feel him tense.

"My Lord, what's wrong?" There it is again, the weight that makes him feel like he's breaking without being broken. "I know you don't need it, but I only wish to help in any way I can…"

His mouth opens and closes several times before he's able to finally find the worse. "You've broken me. Made me weak…and I can't even curse you, or wish we'd never met because I'd be lying."

You chuckle. "My Lord is far from weak."

"Yet I am powerless against you." His four eyes bore into you, in them a mix of desperation and longing, as you gently stroke the wooden part of his face. Finally, he closes his eyes, relaxing against you. "And I never thought defeat could feel like this…"

"Is it pleasant, my Lord?"

"It is…" You feel his fingers tracing along your collarbone, up to your jawline and you feel something wet licking your skin as his hand rests on your throat. A mouth on his hand, gently licking and suckling on the sensitive parts of your neck. "…but only if it's you."

"Lord Sukuna…" Despite everything, you feel he's still tense. "You're tense. Would you like me to…?"

"Yes. I meant to bed you tonight, but this…it's…" He sighs. "Overwhelming. I'm not clueless, but something about you makes it all…too much…"

"Then let me lead, my Lord." You gently push him down, and he lets you - following you as you guide him. His hand takes hold of your chin, pulling you in so your lips meet his. His kiss was tentative and unsure, or perhaps more accurately, scared. Scared of every feeling that threatened to overthrow him. You eagerly massaged your lips against his nonetheless. "Please…allow me to worship you tonight, Lord Sukuna."

His breaths become heavier when you straddle him, gently undoing his kimono while he easily rips your clothes to shreds with a flick of a wrist. Your lips mark his skin gently. Moving down to worship his mouth, jaw, his shoulders, both chests and finally to the mouth on his stomach - who was breathing just as heavy. Sukuna tenses when you take his tongue into your mouth, sucking on it and explore the much bigger one with your smaller tongue.

When you pull away, there's a small pool of saliva where the stomach mouth lay open and plenty on you where the mouth-hands had left their marks on your skin. Both his cocks, beautiful, heavy and fat, sat on his stomach where they were already leaking with arousal. Sukuna's breathing turned heavy, and as your hands move to his waist, stopping just before doing anything, you look up at him. "My Lord, if at any time you wish for me to stop, please say so. I will stop without hesitation or question."

"Always about me…" He chuckles and, in a sudden movement, easily manhandles you so your dripping cunt is on his stomach-mouth. "No, I do not wish to stop. But if you truly ask for nothing in return, then let me be gracious."

"M-my Lord, ah-" Your eyes roll back when you feel that giant tongue lapping at your juices, the both of you moaning as he did so.

"Delicious…" Fingers find their way to your clit, rubbing circles as a mouth sucks hickeys on your skin and your chest - finding the sensitive nubs and harshly tugging. You hear a noise that's half way between a whimper and a moan. "…everything about you…so delicious…"

"That's it, my Lord. I'm yours tonight…" You sigh, mind in bliss as your hands find his cocks. He bucks his hips when you begin to stroke him - slowly, before building to a steady pace. His cocks were thick and fat, heavy and veiny and monstrously beautiful in all the ways that had you nervous to take him. They throbbed eagerly, dare you say even aching for your touch. Bowing down, you take one of his tips into your mouth, careful not to let your teeth get in the way. The way his tip had pulsed and the amount of arousal you had to swallow down, had you moaning and whining happily as you swallowed his cock. Amidst the low growling of his stomach mouth, you hear a noise that's halfway between a whimper and a moan, and feel him buck his hips into your mouth as you lick and suck on him eagerly - tongue, lips and hands feverishly worshipping Sukuna's heavy, monstrous lengths.

The tongue begins to enter you, and you nearly cum on the spot - nearly choking on his cock. Slowly, it reaches deep, deep enough to hit that spot that has you seeing stars - forming a light bulge on your stomach with how big it is. When you continue to moan, Sukuna's hips move on their own - tip fucking your mouth while you drool and stroke him.

You both get lost in pleasure. His large tongue tastes and moves eagerly inside you, practically assaulting that sweet spot as the stomach mouth continues to growl and whine and drool; while you eagerly suck on and stroke his twitching and throbbing lengths. A guttural moan escapes Sukuna's throat when he releases into your greedy mouth, and you do your best to swallow everything he has to offer while his other cock paints you in white. Drool, precum and his seed still leak out your mouth, though - and you quickly find it's too much.

Before you can stop yourself, your cunt clamps down on the large tongue inside you and your body goes tense as you reach your own orgasm. Fluids leak out of your greedy cunt as you squirt on his tongue, which continues to move inside of you well past your high.

His tip leaves your mouth with a sloppy and wet pop and with a groan, the large tongue takes one final lick at your overstimulated insides before it retracts back. You both are breathing heavy, shaking a little as he repositions you onto his lap. His hand caresses your face, eyes completely dilated as he makes a noise somewhere between a moan and a sigh. "Oooh, gods, look at you…"

"My Lord, I-" Your eyes widen a little as you struggle a little in his grasp. "Wait-"

"Have you forgotten who you answer to?" He clicks his tongue. "You are in no position to make demands of me."

"I…answer to you, my Lord." You still, realizing what he was asking you. "I'm sorry."

When you look away bashfully, there's a small silence.

There's a small silence as you look away bashfully. However, when you glance back at him and are met with a frown - there was the sudden realization of an unsaid question waiting to be answered. He hasn't moved at all. Immediately, you explain yourself, not wanting him to get the wrong idea. "I-I'm still a bit sensitive, is all…but I-I still want this! Truly, my Lord! I-I want…I want you, still."

Your voice comes out a little higher than you would have liked, but it seemed to quell him nonetheless.

"As am I, but…" He sighs and before he looks away, you capture his lips in a chaste but wet kiss.

"I know." You bite your lip bashfully and your voice comes out soft and sweet in all the ways that make his cocks twitch. "But, I did promise to worship my Lord tonight. I shouldn't make a promise I can't keep."

When your hands begin to stroke him again, slow and gentle, Sukuna practically throws his head back, biting back a low whimper while his stomach mouth shamelessly groaned and panted. He cursed as his hips began to move on their own, muscles tensing as his cocks grew hard again. Yet when your eyes lock he only sees adoration and longing in them as your hands worshipped him diligently. Not the empty lust he saw in everyone else who wanted him this way but could never get close.

"You look incredible like this, my Lord." Your voice comes out raspy and full of longing, and it tears a near animalistic sound from him.

"Enough." He growls, and you immediately stop. "Let me inside you."

"Anything for you." A mix of arousal, anxiousness and excitement overwhelms you as you climb on top of him, positioning yourself so his bottom cockhead kisses the entrance to your cunt. The both of you share a guttural groan as you sink down on one of his cocks, the free one throbbing delightfully in front of your cunt. Sukuna was massive, to say the least, and despite how dripping wet you both were your legs were still shaking from the wonderful strain. Although your sopping, velvety insides took him in eagerly while being stretched to their limit. The initial pain of the stretch was nearly drowned out by how wonderful he felt inside of you - fat and veiny cock completely filling you, dragging deliciously along your insides. You could feel him his arousal leak inside you, and his length pulsing like a second heartbeat. And when you fully sheathed him inside of you, you both almost lose the ability to think properly.

"S-Sukuna, my Lord…" You'd be embarassed by how shameless you sounded with your Lord now fully inside you, his fat mushroom head threatening to breach the entrance to your cervix and spurting his precum on it. His hands rested on your hips, keeping your bodies joined with a messy puddle of arousal underneath you both. Sukuna's eyes were rolled back and fluttering slightly while his stomach mouth was open with his massive tongue lolled out, making a noise somewhere between a low growl and a whimper. Seeing him like this nearly sent you off the edge.

"O-ooh, gods…" He groans when he feels you clamp down on him, and a hand pulls your head into a clumsy kiss. You feel his breath turn into full on panting when he tasted himself on you, the hands on your hips now painfully digging into your skin as he begins to thrust up into you - sloppy, slow and languid, as if trying to get even deeper than he could. Your free hands, once caressing the wooden part of his face, now move down to stroke his free cock - earning you a low growling from the stomach mouth as it started panting.

"Oh, you feel heavenly, Lord Sukuna…" As if encouraged by your words, his thrusts start to get faster, harder - a steady rhythm beginning to build. "That's it. You're doing so well, my Lord."

"Ngh, ah…" Oh, how your Lord made such sweet sounds.

Neither of you were going to last long, it was all too much.

The pain had long subsided, replaced only with ecstacy. Sukuna's fat and heavy cock dragged along every part of your insides, and the feeling of the warm arousal dripping from his tip and the throbbing of his veiny length had you near screaming into his mouth. Your Lord was completely filling you and leaving no part of you unloved. While your wet and sloppy cunt desperately sucked him in every time you and him moved, only to be rewarded as he thrusted back in and you bounced back down on him, wet velvety insides squeezing him tightly as if never wanting him to leave. Without you even realizing it, your body was unconsciously and sweetly worshipping and loving your god. "A-ah, I love you, my Lord!"

Something in Sukuna snaps upon hearing those words, which were otherwise empty - had it come from someone else.

"Let me taste you." He practically whimpers into your mouth as you both pant and continue to knot tongues. The kiss is clumsy, inexperienced, but you were far too lost in love to care - exploring your Lord's mouth eagerly while you struggle to ride his beautiful, monstrous form. The tongues on his mouths sucking, biting and tasting your skin; marking every bit of your body they could. This would hurt, but you didn't care. You only wanted to show your god how much you loved him. "And I want you to accept me, too..."

"Yes, my Lord. Anything-" This would hurt, but you didn't care - only wanting to show your god how much you loved him. "Anything you wish of me…"

With the flick of his wrist, there's a sharp pain on your tongue and a metallic taste floods both of your mouths - there's not enough damage to fully cut off your tongue, however, only a cut.

"Swallow me." Sukuna's breath hitches as he continues to kiss you, letting out a noise between a growl and a whimper, and you realize that it wasn't only your blood in both of your mouths. An offering of a devotee to their god, and a god to their devotee. You eagerly swallow each other's blood, moaning as you share the messy, bloody kiss.

His thrusts get faster and harder, his cock twitching and your cunt spasming. What was once a steady rhythm has now turned sloppy as you both rode each other into your high. Sukuna reaches his orgasm with a choked sob, and you reach yours with a scream - bodies tensing as you both get lost in each other and neither of you stop moving. His warm and thick seed floods your insides, far too copious and spilling over as he paints your womb white. Your cunt spasms and clamps down on him, almost painfully milking and sucking him in, desperately trying and failing to keep his overflowing love inside.

It feels like forever, but you eventually collapse on top of him - both of you too tired to pull out. Your minds were completely muddled, bodies shaky with the high and tranquility of post-orgasm. There was nothing but the sound of your breathing for a while, before he silently cups your face and you feel the sting on your tongue disappear. With shaky hands, you touch your tongue and find the cut was healed.

"Thank you for sharing your blood with me, my Lord." You bury your face in the crook of his neck. "If I may, might I stay the night?"

"You'll be staying here every night, from now on." Without realizing it, his lips reach your forehead. "And for the rest of eternity, you will never leave my side."

"Yes, my Lord. I swear it." It was one simple, powerful vow that had you staying by his side for the rest of your life…

And made you return to him, in every life after.

-----

My GAAAHD was this difficult to write. Not the actual writing part itself, oh NO. But finding the time for writing. YEEESH. Anyways, have a great day!

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Taglist:

[bluenightcomedies]

uuuugh i keep procrastinating cuz i wanna make new refs n' arts n' all for us all but art slow so fuggit placeholder pinned abt the system better pinned with comm details, other accs, etc later :3 will reopen for commissions once arty verifies me! as a whole we're legally deaf and disabled! we can all draw but have diff styles/preferences :3 body is 30 (eugh i don't like admitting that) so am adult BUT we don't wanna be involved in nsfw art so pls respect that⭐ We can't get a formal diagnosis due to various real life issues, so we're not going to claim any particular diagnosis, but we can't exactly ignore the symptoms and stay masked forever. We're going to stay out of syscourse as much as possible, of course. 🌙 each alter has an assigned emoji so ppl can tell us apart easier if needed, use em as our tags too (when we remember) note- using they/them for any of us fine too!⭐

(doesn't include alters that rarely or never front) ⭐star emoji = Blue! she/her pls~ guess i'm the honorary host cuz i front most. uhhh... nothing rly too fancy i can say abt myself, i'm p affectionate and love y2k art and hanging out, i try to be as nice as i can >w< my art's usually sketchbooky, with thin lines and soft colors/shading!

💠this blue gem/flower emoji is Azure! she/her, she's kinda new to the system. looks n' acts a lot like me but uh... more childish i guess? very silly, very 'cringe culture is dead'. loves to rp, say silly things, n' cling to people. hyperfixates on Dot Hack (RIP) her art looks like mspaint x3 🌙 (Writing for myself since I'm available.) The name's Lune, hence moon emoji, and I use she/her pronouns as well. Formerly "Starry" but people kept confusing me with Blue due to her star symbolism. Used to be the designated mask, I'm glad I don't have to do that anymore... Sometimes I re-mask out of habit so if something sounds like me but wasn't marked as an alter, it probably is me. I have a flat tone and chronic paranoid anxiety so uh... Let me know if I come across as rude, I usually don't mean to. I enjoy doing research and organizing information, so I'm often the one to fact-check things or find guides and how-to's for the system. My art's very bold and colorful, and friends describe it as 'angular'. Clashes with my personality, huh? 🗝️key emoji = Sylverwynd! he uses he/him! he's super laid back and chill, i've never seen him upset or anything, but he's rly long-winded talks... kinda poet-y? he loves reading and talking abt lore and myths so he'll pop in if ur talking abt something he likes or if he has trivia 2 share! fave genres r horror n' fantasy he's still experimenting w/ style but likes drawing rly soft

❌cross emoji= Laceburner! it/its or they/them pronouns! tbh i'm not used to it/its pronouns but Lace wanted em; it's very uh... emotionally empty i guess? aroace, agender, can't socialize or empathize v well. it usually fronts when the rest of us are tired or in pain cuz it just ignores all that. likes 2000's scenemo aesthetics though which is surprising but ye idk how to describe its style, but it's trying to mimic emo art n' likes bright colored lines with dark bg/colors 🗡️the dagger is Kal! he/him pronouns, he gets angry and stressed abt things really easy but he gets too hostile abt it so he tries to not front too much; need to find him a way to de-stress n' chill out... when he's not mad at smth he's a good sympathetic listener imo, still swears and talks all rough tho hasn't drawn much yet but does rly harsh lines and fast/messy sketches when he does (and gets riled up by mistakes =w=;)

❤️heart is Weiss! genderfluid, goes by any pronouns, usually uses whatever they like at the time x3 has a hard time fronting but tries to. flirty, loves dumb jokes, overly confident... (we worry they'd get us in trouble sometimes cuz the shit they want to say) loves demon and monster-related stuff! still experimental style but uses bold colors and thick rough lines a lot, may get suggestive (forbidden from outright nsfw, don't ask >:c) btw ur always welcome to direct asks @ someone specific >w< we just might take a while to respond