a little excerpt from a new daredevil and avengers fic im writing.
premise: matt did die at midland circle, but he learnt many things from stick, and he can be the devil in more than name, so he refused to fall.
The world is on fire.
All his nerves are firing, the cuts on his body like flows of molten rock, the raw skin over his torso is covered in flaking patches of blood, the microscopic particles in the air running like sandpaper over his open skin, the vibrations of a train more than twenty blocks away arching through his bones, the lines of still-warm blood that flow down his body feels like someone carving a white-hot knife through him even though blood isn’t even close to that temperature-
Footsteps sound on steel sixteen blocks away. He flinches, burying his head deeper into his shoulders, but he can still hear all of it-
The minivan with AC/DC blaring through the speakers and the shouts and yells of the eleven people drunk and dancing thirty-seven blocks away, the cars on the streets, the screech of breaks failing as one car slams into a corner shop’s glass window, taking a drunk couple with them into death,
a man with a broken rib and a woman with a dislocated shoulder screaming and yelling at each other in Romanian, as a little girl two rooms over holds her baby brother in his crib crying, three pairs of people having sex, the dying heartbeat of an old woman sitting on the side of the road, staring up at the stars,
the gunfight at the docks, two kids screaming for someone to save their father as an alcoholic mother smashes a bottle into his exposed back, a teen sitting on top of a ten-storey building zipping up a bag and stepping off the ledge-
A child in the corner of a room, gagged and long since out of tears shivering violently as their blood pressure drops to lethal levels, a sister curling around the dying body of her older brother held by her mother and father as their son dies of something that could’ve been treated had they been anywhere else,
the screams of children, teens, adults and elders alike, the laughs of thirteen different people- some hysterical, some cruel, one joyful- and the thousands of different heartbeats he hears-
He can hear the gravel under his feet, the scrape of his bare feet across it, the bones in his body moving, joints rotating as his ligaments move in an instinctual way to walk, his muscles contracting and expanding, his blood rushing around his body, the blood still running on the outside of his body over skin, his heartbeat, the grinding of his teeth and his eyes blinking but he can’t see and he hasn’t been able to since he was nine-
He shudders as the scent of rotting and decaying bodies rush over him, joining the smell of salt, wind, pollen, dead fish, sulphur, motor oil, sweat, sex, alcohol, skin, nylon, plastic, burning rubber, metal, leather, cologne, perfume, tears, bricks and more and more and more and more-
But he hears familiar humming from a familiar place as he clenches his eyes shut to stop the dust and sound and light from touching them, and he stumbles from an alley as the talking of four people becomes crystal clear, he can hear the mechanical whirring from a man’s chest,
the high-pitched endless squeal of hearing-aids from another, the trained quiet from a woman, and the heavy thundering heartbeat from a man who’s muscles twitch then move as the man steps towards him, and he can hear the man’s lungs contract and air start moving as the man’s vocal folds move and the man starts yelling, “sir!” and he flinches, burying his head further into his shoulders and limping on forward to that familiar place.
bc i haven't slept, for anyone who actually reads all the way down here, you get a present called the google doc link where i put my chapters. all it's got is some of chapter 1 at the moment
Also, the 'him' refers to matt, because he quite literally just revived himself and escaped after a year of semi-torture, and he doesn't remember his name yet.
the man refers to steve (captain america) most of the time
also i know the formatting is shit, but ao3 has more space so hopefully it dont look as shit on there
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sure i find you in my hair and under my pillow and in the car. but i know in my heart you are picking me out of your teeth. i know i am burning through your sundays, sticking to your ceiling.
i hope i'm in every bitter cup of coffee and every candle wick and every bath. i hope my shadow flickers under your door so the empty hallway i have left behind is a swift dart of nothing more. i hope you find me in notebooks and stop signs and fleetwood mac - like i am marginalia on your life, i want my fingerprints burned into your days like acid.
i loved you, and you know i loved you, and for the rest of your life i will be the person you broke. for the rest of your life i hope the shame of that runs like a cattle dog, bites at your heels. i hope every time your cup is full or the moon is a toenail or a cat is purring or a laugh is in your belly or the sky turns pink while the sun is setting - i hope you remember that someone loved you, and you crushed them in your palms. you extinguished every future i lit. i hope that haunts you.
i hope you never fucking forget it.
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