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#im so tired of being so easily emotional
nimomo-mo · 2 years
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Just venting bc ive exhausted my friends with this lol
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sensitivegoblin · 6 days
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Stupid period vent
If youre a cis man; kiss a uterous haver on the forehead today
Cus fuck this feels like a mental parasite
#:(#i hate getting my period :(#im so emotional#fuck a stupid tiktok has me hyperventalating over hpw i miss my mom and i was 4 again#my dad doesnt come home for another 3 hrs......#i need a hug so badly i wanna call him and ask him to come home but i shouldnt#.....fuck i think i might need to#i hate that i was literally fine until that stupid tiktok....#have you guys seen the cat Mao cartoons on tiktok? i always get sucked and forget theyre always emotional#this one was about a mom cat and a kitten and the mom cat died#i hate my mom and think she did horrendous things to me i shouldnt be screaming how much i miss her#fuck.#i dont wanna keep growing up and watching everyone die or leave#fuck im spiraling so bad#the safe thing might be to call my dad but i really really shouldnt make him leave work#i can never do the right thing im so fucking broken#i really need a hug and a joint#if i dont message you back im ok: i just feel very uncontrollable rn#going back n forth between anger and heartbreak#ALL OF THIS OVER A FUCKING TIKTOK#im so fucking stupid..#ill be okay i just hate being alone when im thinking about my mom/dark stuff#im not even sewerslidal im just extreamly emotional and its scaring me#if im not ok by 3pm ill call my dad#i feel nothing one minute and then i feel everything and rinse repeat#i just hate that i get triggered so easily#i already feel a lil calmer im just tired n need a hug#i know that im safe my body just physically does not feel safe#so im like trapped in my head#but if my dad was here hed be able to pull me out
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pilotstreets · 2 years
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god. not to be sad online. but im sad online
#um. sorry i went on a really really long rant abt my emotions in the tags. hehehoho im sad!#im just like. there's no way im getting older. i feel like i haven't changed since i was 14 and i feel so disconnected from everything#my birthday is in like 3 weeks but i keep thinking im turning 15 or 16 again and i'll be able to live my teenage years again and#do it right this time or something but no! that's not how that works! obviously!#when my best friend turned 18 she immediately started saying ''im an adult im different im older'' but like#i think about how i'll be 18 soon and im just scared and im going to be holding onto teenage years and#fantasies about them that will never happen and it's just exhausting#i know i sound like such a dramatic teenager but i AM a dramatic teenager!#i had so much shit happen to me that made me lose out on so much of being a teenager and it's like#crushing that i'll never get those years back and other peoples choices ruined my life before i had a chance to have much of one#and i've missed out on so many experiences that all my friends got and i feel such a barrier between me and other people#for that reason and i also feel a disconnect between me and literally everybody i know#and making friends is literally impossible for me anymore and i just feel like i keep losing friends and one day i'll wake up and#i won't have anyone anymore. and i find it hard to talk to people who were my best friends for awhile and i just fall deeper into this#pit of loneliness every day and there's nothing i can do so i just give up. i dunno#im so tired and im just so so lonely and done with. existing#and im also never anybody's first choice which is always annoying but#and it's just.... heartbreaking to think about how my best friend will never choose me when her other best friend is there and#how when we all hang out they're both actually mean to me and there's just nothing i can do other than text my mom and cry#and it makes me doubt how much she cares if she gets that way so easily y'know?#ugh it's all juvenile problems but they just weigh so heavily on me :/#okay enough oversharing online for the night im going to sleep now. then tomorrow i'll just#have the same thoughts and it'll only get worse
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aashiqvi · 1 year
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Bought kaikeyi :-) gonna get back into reading and feeling stable !
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etherealkissed88 · 9 months
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5 GAME CHANGERS OF THE LAW ★
loass things i think you should know that makes things easier
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“DARE TO ASSUME” + JUST HAVE FAITH: just accept/assume what you want as easily as you effortlessly assume negative things. just do it. most of the time people are thinking about the 'perfect way' to imagine or manifest. they look for the 'perfect technique' when theres no such thing. just dare to assume it is yours now! when it is assumed, have faith in that assumption. just decide its done no matter what you see. whatever you assume and persist in will harden into a fact right? once youve assumed it true, go about your 3d life having faith in imagination. know that your desires exist already since creation is finished so theres no way that it's "impossible to manifest". just surrender yourself to faith. just trust the law. you have been applying the law since you were born without knowing. now that you understand the law, just allow yourself to have faith in it. it cannot fail. you assume something to be true and continue being that version of you in imagination aka persisting = manifestation. thats the law. if fears, anxiety, or negative thoughts come, "dare to assume" they have no affect on you, because by default they dont either way. "dare to assume its yours because you are always the operant power who choses how life goes. it gets to a point when youre tired of going back and forth with “i have it” to “no i dont”. it all comes down to faith. you should have faith in yourself and the law especially since the five senses you use to interact with the 3d are all limited and you cant see everything that goes on in the 3d. thats why it makes sense to assume something and stick with it regardless of the 3d. when will you realize that a version of you who has your desires already exists, so just surrender to the version of you who has it already in imagination. stop limiting yourself because of “fears” and just say yes to imagination.
so, i dont give a fuck about what negative thoughts or anxiety you have, just assume its done. its too easy but you overcomplicate it. once assumed, have faith and persist because this is called the law of assumption after all.
THE 3D FOLLOWS, IT DOES NOT PRECEDE: the 3d does not have a mind of its own. its only job is to reflect imagination so who ever you are being imagination, it copies. im sure youve heard the phrase “signs follow, they do not precede” which means signs do not come before your manifestation. they are there (if your limited senses can see it) because that is who you are assuming to be in imagination so it follows that (signs arent important either way so dont spend time searching for them and focusing on them when you should be focused on already being at your end goal which is already having ur desire). similarly with the 3d, the 3d literally only follows you so for it to change or show you something you want, you have to change self/imagination. the 3d literally obeys imagination so expecting it to change without changing self doesnt make sense. if you find yourself getting angry w the 3d, remind yourself “the 3d follows, it does not precede”. it cannot move on its own without your permission because you are the operant power. knowing this should send you straight into being the change you want to see and depend on limitless imagination only.
this also helps with accepting you are the only source of power and helps stop yourself from validating and depending on the 3d. when you know the 3d depends on you to change, you no depend on the 3d to show you your desire. you no longer crave seeing change from it, rather you be the change.
YOU WANT THE FEELING: im not even gonna say you dont want it in the 3d because of course your human self wants the physical experience. but you have to know that the feeling (the knowing, not emotions), dictate how you feel about it in the 3d. for example, read this and realize that even if you physically manifest your desire, if you dont feel / know that it is truly yours (aka if you arent fulfilled), it can lead you to get insecure and assume negative. an example is when someone manifests their sp but they still assume that their sp will get tired of them and wouldnt love them for long. this person was not feeling fulfilled (knowing) that they were in a committed and loving relationship which is why even with physical proof of the relationship, they still felt that it wouldnt last. you want the feeling of being loved, of having financial freedom, of feeling confident in your body, and then the physical manifestation of it is a cherry on top. you see how that if you lack the knowing (feeling) of your desire, you can allow bad assumptions to overconsume you and even ruin the fun experience of physically experiencing it in the 3d because you arent even sure of really having it (another example of how who you are in imagination = everything else).
focus on that inner fulfillment next time you imagine something. are you satisfying yourself and returning to the state to the point where you can accept it and know its truly done?
ENJOY YOURSELF: actually imagine to enjoy yourself. what do you want to experience? forget about trying to manifest that sp or money, what do you actually want to experience with that desire? whatever you truly want, imagine it for your own enjoyment and once imagined, it is experienced. manifesting is literally supposed to be fun so imagine for fun, do your techniques for fun and by law, it will reflect either way. realize that imagination can take you anywhere at anytime. you can imagine anything you want so imagine to the point where you dont desire that thing anymore because you know it is yours in limitless imagination. this is fulfillment: you realize you are experiencing it now as limitless self and you are doing it for your own enjoyment. thats leaving the 3d alone and not depending on it for validation and thats the best part of satisfying yourself in imagination.
i say this because ive realized that when i used to imagine something and do techniques, it would feel like im forcing myself to do it and then i dont even actually enjoy myself and enjoy whatever i imagine. figure out specifically what it is you want and imagine it any way you want. chase that satisfaction.
YOU EXPERIENCE IT INSTANTLY: when you imagine something, you experience it right away. it is experienced in the present always! if i imagine myself holding $1000, i really am holding $1000 in that moment. this is because you are consciousness simply being aware of whatever. once you are aware of something in imagination, it really has been experienced already. once imagined, it really happened! if you think this is not true its because you limit yourself to the dead, neutral 3d and think that the 3d is the only 'real' thing. this is not true especially since the 3d is a reflection of who you are being or who you assume to be in imagination, meaning that imagination is everywhere and is the 3d. as the operant power, you have full control over everything (over what manifests or not, etc). so even though you really experienced something in imagination instantly, you can assume it is true or not. you are the only source of power that can choose to identify with what you wants and has full control over whether or not something will be true in your reality. stop waiting for the 3d to change in order to “accept” it. stop being a slave to the 3d when you are the one who controls it in the first place. you can experience it instantly right now so why wait for the 3d to do that?
literally imagination is the source, yes? its the source because it always is molding the 3d (since they are connected) so hearing that once you imagine something, you experienced it instantly, should give you the confidence to know you really do have your desire already since it has already been experienced in imagination. nothing in the 3d can change until you change self (imagination) so imagination/self is powerful which is why you are powerful because you = imagination/self. thats literally why you have the ability to manifest in the first place. all there is to do is persist by living 3d life knowing/assuming/identifying as that version of you who has it already.
kisses, jani ☆
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harmoonix · 5 months
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🧚🏼‍♀️Fαιɾყƈσɾҽ🧚🏼‍♀️
*Unlock your inner fairy*
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Come away with me now to the sky
Up all the hills and the sea
Far beyond where memories lie
To a place where Im free to be me
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🧚🏼‍♀️ - Earth Risings (Capricorn, Taurus, Virgo) have that amazing personality thanks to their strong aura and energy. They're that chill yet wholesome person
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Midheaven in Fire Signs will mostly wanna have a job based on their desires and on what they truly want/desire from life
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Having your 4H in an earth sign it can indicate your home can be your biggest comfort, out of all the places
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Moon aspecting the Ascendant brings that type "serene" energy to the native, calm, peaceful, I love how they resemble those things
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Saturn aspecting Venus want a high standard relationship because for them loyalty and teamwork matters a lot in the relationship
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Pluto aspecting Sun/Moon/Ascendant can be judged for who their are, or heavy criticized, it's important to be you even if you have haters
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🧚🏼‍♀️ - Moon in Gemini/Gemini Degrees 3°, 15°, 27° moon loves this energy of self - expressing, I always think about this placement as "life in colors"
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Neptune aspecting Mars will always have a fiery energy, is electrifying and yet charismatic, full of boosts of energy
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Juno aspecting the IC (4th house) will have that familiy oriented spouse, possibly someone who wants also to live a traditional marriage life
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Let the stars fill your soul, when the moon cradles all
So, to yourself be true
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🧚🏼‍♀️ - When you have your North Node in your 9H you gonna decide which faith you wanna follow, which religion, education, schools, you have free will in that area
🧚🏼‍♀️ - North Node in the 3rd/5th house gives you the chance to express yourself how you want, you achieve things in your life by being yourself
🧚🏼‍♀️ - When you have your Mars in your 3rd/6th or 8th house Mars will react either very energetic either very tired. It's important to keep a balance between how lazy you are and how productive you are
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🧚🏼‍♀️ - Water Suns can easily attach emotionally by others, crying in the same time?? Girl yes! Telling your secrets to each other? Girl no! There always should be a boundary between you and your emotional side
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Neptune in the 2H/4H/9H/12H can come from a background with a spiritual family, like your family members can be into spirituality
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Mars/Pluto or Venus in the 5H get tempted easily, like their lust is overdosed here, take care at your temptations especially if you're in relationship
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Suns in the 12H can have a various impacts, on the good side this placement can help at growing spirituality and the bad side it is that it will make you to self - doubt a lot (You're worth it🫶🏼)
🧚🏼‍♀️ - I already said in numerous posts that Venus in Earth Signs men are gentlemen, like their aura is screaming that (GENTLEMAN/MY MAN) I'm looking at Taurus Venus while saying this ofc
🧚🏼‍♀️ - My Juno is in fucking Aquarius okay..so there was once an Aquarius Sun guy who saw me as his "relationship material" and I was like "Um nope" his Juno was in Capricorn while my Sun is in Capricorn and I had no like for him 😅🫶🏼
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Can we appreciate Capricorns for wanting to date older people so they don't have to suffocate themselves with the ones who have not matured at a certain time
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🧚🏼‍♀️ - Cancer Moons will basically attach to your heart like a spider cloth, and it maybe devour it at some point. If you love them they gonna "devour" your love
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Moon in the 1st/3rd/5th/9th houses love to party and enjoy life, the soul of the party placement literally
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Juno in 2H/Juno in Taurus is giving spoiling spouse,girl "you wake up with 24k gold earrings beside your bed from your spouse"energy
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Aries/Scorpio and Sagittarius Mars are those bad bitches who nobody plays with like, they don't accept it
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Mars in the 11H or Mars in Aquarius can become quite obsessive/possesive around their friends but in the same time can have lots of conflicts with them because after all Mars is the planet of war
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Stellium or lots of placements in the 9th house can show love for traveling/exploring/ even learning new things
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🧚🏼‍♀️ - Stellium in the 5th house or in Leo can indicate a lot creativity, a very talented person, can indicate you love being yourself as well
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Juno in the 11H or in Aquarius can indicate your husband will for sure be one of your closest friends
🧚🏼‍♀️ - If someone has Pluto - Sun aspects you can tell they can be misunderstood a lot, is hard to fit in the norm if you're just trying to make a difference
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Aquarius Suns and Risings are different from their family members or relatives, like when you go for example and visit their family, these natives will always stand out of them
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Sun in your 6H/12H can make you just tired or drained easily, try to not force yourself to do certain things if you don't really want that
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Mars in the 1H/Aries Mars is an icon placement, it shows a lot of motivation and energy towards the things you wanna do in your life
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Jupiter conjunct/trine/sextile Mars makes you extremely ambitious, very desirable, and you can actually manifest things so fast with these placements
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Venus aspecting the Midheaven (in good aspects) can be appreciated at their work for their personality/aura/vibe
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🧚🏼‍♀️ - Having more Cardinal Signs in your chart than others (Aries, Cancer, Libra, Capricorn) shows you're not afraid of change, sudden changes, you're ready for everything that comes in your life
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Chiron aspecting Ascendant (all aspects) can indicate a very big journey when it comes to self - discovering and healing yourself!! Your healing era is precious
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Having your 8H in a fire sign shows a person who is very sensual/passionate/has lot of desires and lots of naughty thoughts
🧚🏼‍♀️ - When you and a person share the same Lilith sign, you can both understand eachother on a psychic level, you can also tell which bad traits you have to eachother
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Pisces Saturn has a lesson about becoming more spiritual and finding your inner faith in a way, being more connected with yourself
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Sun/Lilith or Saturn in the 10H can have really big issues with their dads, the dad can be controlling/strict or just mean with some of these placements
🧚🏼‍♀️ - Chiron in the 2H can also be about being more healthy in your diet, like eating more healthy food and keep a balance in your body
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~ Bad bitches grew up with Tinkerbell 🧚🏼‍♀️🫶🏼 ~
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norrizzandpia · 9 months
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hello, firstly i would like to say ur writing is phenomenal!! secondly i wanted to request something like the reader having some insecurities or just social media making her feel unworthy of lando thank u 🫶🏼
Ive been hanging onto this request for a while bc i love these scenarios bc they hit so close to home and I always need to be in the right mindset for them and now i am!
Love You the Way I Do (LN4)
Summary: When Y/n starts to pull back, Lando knows exactly what to do.
Warnings: insecurities, talks of not being good enough, language
Note: the reason ive been so mia on here is because ive just been in such a bad slump and not feeling good about myself or feeling good enough in general and im starting to get out of it with a lot of time focusing on myself but i really miss it on here so im using this as a way to kind of help me cope a bit with what ive been going through recently
Y/n was never good with her emotions. Discussing them and trying to work on them, she could never reach a certain level of comfortability with the people in her life that allowed her to be that vulnerable with them. Her parents, friends, and other family members had to pry words out of her when it was clear she was struggling and no amount of therapy sessions had cured the vicious cycle. However, Lando’s peaceful presence in her life had shifted the way she operated, allowed her to open up more easily with the way he would hold her until she was ready.
He was patient, almost strategic, when it came to getting through to her. Past moments of darkness where she would try to shut him out, try to be alone in the agony, were lessons in which ways worked best to get her to realize that he was there for her, waiting with open arms and constantly ready to listen.
Easing her mind, that was Lando’s job and he was damn good at it.
He could always tell when there was a war going on beneath the walls of her head. When she would go quiet or laugh just a bit less, he caught on fast. Just like now, as he sat on the couch in their shared apartment and watched her talk to her sister on the phone in the kitchen, Lando clocked the way she wasn’t as smiley, as excited to talk to one of her favorite people in the world.
“Thursday? No, I can’t do Thursday. I’ve got some stuff to do.” She mumbled into the speaker. Lando could hear her sister respond, something about Y/n being too busy, but he couldn’t truly digest the words, too engrossed in his own mind wondering what she had Thursday.
If he remembered correctly, she had nothing scheduled.
The second sign; distancing herself from people close to her and staying inside unhealthily.
She paced the room, rounding each corner of the counter as she bit the nail on her thumb, “Friday, no… next Monday, no… next Wednesday, no…”
Their conversation continued that way until her sister gave up on trying to find a date, muttering about letting her know when the next date Y/n was available was, and hung up. His girlfriend set the phone down on the marble, head falling forward as she huffed out a breath.
“You okay, love?” He spoke, voice hesitant as to not startle very clearly something loud in her mind.
She turned her eyes, squinting at him lightly before whispering, almost too quietly, “Yeah, I’m fine. Just tired.”
A tired Y/n, Lando knew, warranted clinginess. That was her usual way of remedying exhaustion, curling up in his arms wherever he was and partaking in a Power Nap. Although, there was none of that as she walked out of the kitchen, turning a corner and disappearing behind their bedroom door.
Third sign; shutting Lando out, the one he hated the most.
He scrolled through his phone for a minute more, not wanting her to know he had already realized her turmoil. He wanted her to believe that his comfort was not out of pity, but love.
When the clock reached an even number, he got up from his seated position and pattered over to their door, knocking lightly.
“Y/n? Can I come in?” He said, though there was no response. He creaked the door open, seeing her frame turned away from him as it laid on their bed, her phone illuminating the room.
Because of the darkness and the only light coming from her phone, he could easily see what she was looking at. It was as clear as day and the reason for her distance, however painful, became apparent.
A twitter thread of why Luisa was better for Lando than Y/n.
It broke his heart.
He stood for a moment, taking in the scene before him and breathing deeply, and deciding his plan of action. It only took him a few seconds, although, he knew exactly what he wanted to say to her.
Lando approached her side of the bed and when his footsteps reached the ears of his beloved, she turned her phone off quickly. He kneeled down beside her, dried tears on her cheeks not going unnoticed by him. His hand cradled the side of her face that wasn’t pushed into her pillow and he kissed her forehead.
“Baby, I saw what you were looking at.” He whispered into the quiet. His green eyes bore into hers as she willed the knot in her throat to dissipate.
Lando gently took her phone from her hands, sliding it off the bed and setting it on the night stand next to him. He nudged her shoulder, signaling for her to move over so he could squeeze into her side of their massive bed. When he laid down, his arms wrapped tightly around her frame, squeezing the skin and warming it as she nuzzled her head into his chest.
“Why are you doing this to yourself? You know they’re wrong.” He tried.
Y/n pulled away from his chest, looking up at him and using her voice, albeit wobbly, “Do I know they’re wrong? Lan, you mean so much to so many people in this world, people you don’t even know the names of.”
He nodded, “Okay, yes, what does that have to do with this?”
She sniffled, “There are so many other women that could compliment you better. Women that people know the name of. Women that have made their mark on this world just like you have. I will never be able to be what you need me to be.”
Lando shook his head, her words outrageous in his mind because she was already everything he needed, just as she was.
“Y/n, what? What are you even saying? That’s crazy. You mean everything to me. I don’t want anyone else. I don’t care about anyone else, anything else. You compliment my life and my happiness perfectly. That’s all that matters.”
Wetness formed beneath her eyes once more and began to fall freely as she toyed with the hem of his shirt, “What if you wake up one day and realize that Luisa is better suited for the life you lead? What if one day you wake up and I am no longer good enough for you?”
Lando gaped at her, truly at a loss for words. In his mind, everything she was saying was so incredibly wrong, she couldn’t be farther from the truth. However, from the sadden look in her eyes, he could tell that she fully believed the things flying from her mouth. That idea, the thought that she was scared one day he would no longer cherish her in the way he does now, made him all the more determined to remind how much she matters to him and how that will never change.
“Y/n, stop. Listen to yourself. Have I ever made you feel inadequate?” He questioned, staring at her fiercely as if what she was saying made him defensive. It did in a way. He was defensive of the love he had for her, taking shame in the fact that he had made her feel as though their relationship would end.
She shook her head as he brought his fingers up to wipe at the tears still falling down her skin, “No, but-”
He brought his pointer finger to her lips, “No buts, Y/n. Listen to me when I tell you this. You have been and always be more than enough for me. You are the start and end of my day, and that is something I never want to change. Being scared that one day I’ll wake up and magically have fallen out of love with you is absolutely fucking clinically insane. It’s been two years we’ve been together, Y/n, and I still badger you at the end of the day, asking what you had done because I love to hear your voice. I love your rambles and I love the way you love me. There’s nothing that’s going to make me want to stop loving you because there’s really no going back. I’m in this with you and I always will be. You need to believe that. Believe me when I say the only way we will end is lying next to each other on our death beds with rings on our left fingers from our wedding decades ago.”
“That’s kind of morbid.” She whispered, a small smile gracing her features as his words sunk beneath her skin.
He chucked and leaned further into her, “It’s true. There will come a time where I get on one knee in front of you and beg you to be with me for the rest of our lives. There will come a time where I will stand in front of all of our friends and family, and declare my love for you and certainty over marrying you. I know these things will happen because I am interchangeably in love with you. And I know you are with me too. So, just leave social media be, baby. Stay here in this moment with me, push all those disgusting fans away and listen to my words. I love you,” He shook her head lightly in his hands as he spoke, “You are worthy of my love and love in general, and there will never come a singular moment where even the thought of leaving you passes my brain. We are it for each other, love. This is it for me.”
Her body relaxed fully into his arms and further into the bed as they stared at each other. Y/n giggled at his words and he smiled down at her, still holding her face whilst lightly rubbing excess tears in her soft skin.
A silence passed before Y/n mumbled, “I think I’m going to delete my social media platforms for a while. Take some time off and get back on track.”
Warmth swelled in Lando’s chest, threatening to spill out from his mouth at overwhelming amounts of it within his body.
“I’m so proud of you, love.” He whispered, leaning in to kiss her softly. He pecked her lips lovingly, sweet nothings spilling from his mouth in the form of the warmth that had been drowning him.
They stayed that way for a few hours, both falling in out of sleep in the arms of the other. And when crickets chirped and the clock read an ungodly time, Lando pulled Y/n from bed, into their bathroom, where he showed her how much he loved her. A bath, some face masks, and low music that he made her dance with him along to, all worked as ways for him to tangibly exude the feelings he had for her. No longer were the ex’s of his past, no longer were jealous fans, no longer were thoughts of unworthiness.
Just him, her, and the love that would never die out.
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abbyromanoff · 9 months
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Hi! Can I request G!P natasha x R where Nat retired after they got married. However, Nat got a call from steve saying she's needed in the avengers and Nat says yes. She did not consider R's feelings and when she came back, she found out that R had a miscarriage due to stress. :(
I WISH I COULD SAY IM SORRY
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PAIRINGS: Natasha Romanoff x reader
WORD COUNT: 1,538
WARNINGS: angst, kinda happy ending, stressful encounters, Nat being neglectful, pregnancies, miscarriages, think that’s all :)
NO ONE IS PERMITTED TO STEAL, COPY, OR REBLOG MY WORK AS THEIR OWN!!
“Y/N, we’ve talked about this,” Nat proclaimed with a sigh, and her gaze was unable to meet yours. Her voice was low, as if she was tired of the topic.
“No, you talked about it, I haven’t got to put my input on any of this! I am due in less than a month, and you want to fucking leave?” She threw her clothes loosely into her bag, and her eyes squeezed shut in irritation. She tied her hair up, removing it from her view while her body began to tense.
“I don’t have a choice, this is my job.”
“And I’m nothing? I’m your wife, Natasha, your wife. You decided to marry me, in sickness and in hell, you remember?”
“Of course, I remember-“
“No, no you don’t. Because you promised me, you promised in your vows that you would never leave my side, and you’re leaving? When I am carrying your child, you want to leave for a mission that anyone else could take?”
“It’s not that simple, my qualifications are required for this.”
“What about Tony, huh? He has a suit of armor, he has blasts that come out of his hand for fucks sake. Or Steve and Bucky, who have super soldier serum? Or Wanda, who has the power to defeat the entire world if she wants to. But you’re needed? You have fists and weapons, sure you have some of the best skills known to mankind, but they will always have more than you. They got lucky, Nat. You’re stuck with the skills you learned, and they have enchantments you don’t, they could easily do anything.” She bit her lip, and her head began swarming with your words. They were better than her, and they always would be. Even in your eyes, they were better.
“I’m needed, Y/N, and my job will always be more important than you are. I will see you in a week, goodbye.” She left without the words ‘I love you’ even leaving her, and you knew that was the end of this discussion, and possibly your relationship. You felt so idiotic, maybe you overreacted? Why would you say that? You knew she had more skills than her coworkers, you were just being selfish in asking if she could stay. You tried texting her apologies, but they went unread.
While you began your episode of sulking, Nat began hers of distraction. She felt so weak hearing you say it, and her insecurities began getting the best of her. Wanda and you had always been close, too close for her liking; but you always told her she had nothing to worry about, that she was simply just a friend and nothing more. But Wanda was stronger than her, she had the ability to defeat all of mankind, but Nat didn’t. Nat could barely even keep you happy, and she knew Wanda made you happier. Wanda was like your break, and your wife was the one making you need a break. And while that was nowhere near the truth in your mind, it was in hers.
The mission continued with little word from Nat, and the stress began taking over. You were filled with worry, and panic, and Nat wasn’t there to relieve that. No, she was the one causing it. You wanted to hate her, how could she leave you like this? But you didn’t just blame her, you blamed yourself. How could you be so stupid? How could you let your emotions get the best of you and belittle her strength when knowing that was her weak spot? You weren’t deserving of her, but that didn’t mean she had to leave you to rot alone.
The only hope you had was Nathan, the baby boy resting in your stomach. And you thought it would be impossible to lose him too, but when you woke with your sheets covered in blood, your crotch the same, you had a gut feeling that this was the last of it. Nat said she would always be here for you, but now she was gone, and you could only hope your child didn’t have the same fate. And while you wanted to have faith, you began picturing the hardships of losing him, and it caused your eyes to blur the entire ride to the hospital. It wasn’t far, and Wanda was on the phone the entire time to console you while ensuring she would be there as soon as possible, it felt as though seconds were hours, and days were months.
“I’m so scared, Wanda, I can’t lose my little boy.” Her heart shattered the worse your thoughts became, and she couldn’t deny that hers were beginning to stir as well.
“You’re not going to lose him, Y/N.”
“You don’t know that.” There was a small beat of silence before her wounded voice arrived once more.
“No, I don’t. But I want to believe it.”
“Nat, you need to get your ass home now. Y/N had to go into emergency labor, they didn’t allow me in but you need to man up and fucking get here already.” You were brought into surgery instantly, and they began performing a c-section in a desperate hope to save the child. Nat’s eyes widened when hearing the news, and in less than minutes she was stirring the Quinjet in your direction. It took less than an hour before she was there, and by the time she was, Wanda was no longer in the waiting room. She stormed in, lips failing to produce the words she wanted to say until Wanda stood, and Nat could tell by the look she gave that she wasn’t going to be receiving positive words.
“Where’s my boy?” Wanda looked down and gulped the tears back, wiping her cheek from the ones that chose to appear. “Where is Nathan, Wanda? Where’s my baby boy?” Tears of her own began to form, and she tried forcing them to stay at bay, but they quickly began streaming down her face.
“She had a miscarriage, The Doctor said all the stress got to her, and, uhm, the baby died, Natasha.” She put her hands on her hips, and Nat nearly broke entirely. It felt like her entire life was coming down on her, and the realization that it was her fault sunk in. She was the one to cause your pain, your stressing mind, and it was what caused the death of her child. She was a killer to her own family.
“I…”
“Don’t, Nat, it’s best you don’t say anything. You already hurt them enough, they don’t deserve this from you.” Nat decided to stay until you woke, but you begged her to go away. She cried by your side, apologies and pleas leaving her tightening throat, but you continued to stay strong in your choice. Wanda forced her to leave, and while you cried to yourself over the grief of your loves, Wanda began digging into Nat. She yelled, pushing the woman back until they stood outside, and Nat was deemed as too weak to fight back.
“They don’t need you, Natasha, and I certainly don’t need to see you, either. So you decide, you leave on your own, or I’ll force you to your fucking grave myself.” Nat paused, and while she was turning to leave, she suddenly stopped.
“You love them, don’t you?”
“What?”
“You love Y/N.”
“Of course, I do-“
“No, you love them. You’re in love with my wife, aren’t you?”
“Alright, maybe I do, what’s the problem with that? You weren’t there for them, Nat, and guess what; I was the one to swoop in and save the day once again. And watching them run back to you time and time again fucking destroyed me and I’m not letting them make the same mistake again. I don’t care if they love me or not, I will continue to do so and I will continue to show it until the moment I die. So, please, do us all a favor and leave, they’re better off without you.”
Nat didn’t come back, but she watched you from the shadows each day. And one single day stuck out to her. She was sitting in the park, a cap on her head and a book that she hurried her face in. She knew you’d be here, but she didn’t expect Wanda to be there as well. Her eyes widened at the baby carriage you pushed around and the growing stomach. She watched Wanda put her arm around your waist protectively while she glanced with a smile at the young toddler and the soon-to-be child inside of you. Nat’s face fell, and for a moment she pictured herself in the witch's spot.
But then she realized, she used to be the one doing so, she used to be the one holding you and glancing down at what was going to be her baby boy, but you never looked as happy as you did. Maybe it was because of the addition to your small family, or maybe it was because you finally chose the right woman.
And now Nat knew she would forever be stuck as your first love, but someone else would be your last.
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emmebearpaw · 1 month
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The archons but they aren't quite human. i mean. obviously they aren't. But really. I think we should let them get their uncanny on just a little bit. Or a lotta bit. Venti chooses to walk on the ground. They recognize it helps with the whole looking human thing but like, I don't think Barbatos used legs to move. Venti walks silently. Venti can seemingly get into any room. No one has ever seen them do it but they can just appear. The air around them is fresher. Like it sort of just feels nice to be in a room with it. Also, doesn't need eyes to see. Like, very clearly can seemingly navigate with his eyes closed (uses the air currents). Hair is often blowing in a breeze, even when there isn't one. Zhongli tries to tamp it down but Morax's feet never left the ground. His dragon form didn't fly either. The ground simply would move and bend to be beneath his feet at all times. I don't have as many for him but something about him feels like he should have a low rumble. Incredible at judging weights of things by eye. Like you can hold up some cheese you are about to grate for a recipe and he will tell you that you don't have enough. Also can navigate with eyes closed (just feels through the ground). Eyes glitter gold. He's getting better at hiding it but he blinks one eye at a time.
Ei + The Shogun who doesn't touch the ground when she walks. Hovering just above it. Like a bolt of lightning frozen in time. People's hair stands on end when she approaches. Is so full of static electricity. It doesn't bother her but yeah touching her can shock you.The Shogun doesn't blink but no one noticed that because Ei barely blinks either. Why would she blink? After act 2 of her quest you notice she does actually touch the ground sometimes. She blinks more too.
Nahida's not always planted in the ground but she usually is. Grass and vines and plants coiling their way around her as she stands, but usually easily retreating again when she begins moving. She might be barefoot but the power of the plants protects her from being defeated by a sharp rock. She can also easily ascend by climbing on plants like a step ladder. Yes she does manage to grow plants even if she is indoors or on tile. She actually gets tired if she stops doing it for too long. That's her fucking mycelial network. I think she should start photosynthesizing.
Furina. Furina also seems odd, why you ask? During her 500 years as the archon she learned a bunch of stage tricks to fake archon weirdness. She seems to leave water behind with every step she takes (she has water pouches hidden in her heels that release a little water with each step. Yes she does have to refill them... often). She once demonstrated she can walk on water (faked that lmao). She is genuinely blind in her darker eye though (focalors is also blind in one eye. it's also her darker eye, but i imagine their heterochromia is flipped so they are blind on different sides). This has led to her being genuinely better at navigating by other senses, including her innate ability to figure out where water is. She mostly read it as "ability to know someone is nearby" but it turns out that she could only determine when a Fontanian was nearby due to the fact they were oceanids. She was very weirded out when she stopped being able to do that. Neuvillette doesn't blink much (his eyes literally don't get dry unless he is dehydrated). He can determine where water was sourced from by taste alone (this might not be because he's a dragon. this might just be him). He can also determine when someone is coming (humans are still mostly water). It's literally canon his emotions influence the weather. Fontaine is already humid but god he can single-handedly increase the humidity of a room. anyways i think im out for now lmao
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teenagenutant · 2 years
Note
Ngl I love Galileo's entire concept. Does he have double the ego-mask and double the insecurities?
hope you don't mind me using this message to compile some asks ^^ (if you don't see yours im probably planning on doing something else with it) thank you so much!! first off... yeah totally LOL
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gali's being totally genuine here. i don't think galileo masks their feelings at all- they're a total emotional open book in contrast to both donnie and leo, lmao. when they're being egotistical, they mean it 200%, but its also the same when they're feeling insecure...
(a bunch more galileo asks beloooow)
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made me giggle LMAO
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in regards to powers: i'm still unsure on exactly how to handle it, but i do like the idea of being able to create more stable portal constructs... maybe being able to teleport constructed items? maybe being able to create more sci/fantasy constructs than donnie alone can...? much to think about. parmi definitely has a combined Even More Insane portal powers, messing with both dimensions and space... (but he operates on rule of funny, lol, so a bit unpredictable) they can probably still use their normal separate abilities to some extent, but probably are still affected by each other!
i love the idea of galileo getting Very hyperfocused Very easily- gali gets their love of learning and being right, and they don't feel hungry or tired as much as either donnie or leo would, so they can get really lost in the weeds... components of a fusion remember everything that happens and would probably retain the information learned, but wouldn't for example make leo instantly knowledgable on all the complicated science stuff donnie knows, and vice versa. aka: leo and donnie both ending up with a LOT of contextless, near-useless trivia after unfusing post-wikipedia binge. the image of them fusing exclusively to combine their ability to Prove Someone Wrong On The Internet is really, really good LMAO
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THANK YOU !! galileo was a fun guy to design, i'm really glad people like them. i think being galileo is actually really fun, especially in the moment... like how initially excited donnie was + how hyped leo was to make scifi stuff in mind meld..
thank y'all for the asks!! i'll be tagging this stuff as 'fusion mayhem au' in the future. (again no promises this'll be a Formal AU Thing but i thought it be helpful for people to have a tag to filter!)
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yyunari · 1 year
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JAKE 01. ⏱﹕ꕤ﹔ ETA !
your relationship with jake was built off of lies and deceit. that much was apparent all thanks to minji.
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⌇#GENRE ◠﹒angst + breakup #PAIRING ◠﹒sim jaeyun x fem! reader x ?? #WARNINGS ◠﹒toxic jake #WC ◠﹒1.1k
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being known as overly emotional and often getting pushed over had its struggles. that much was clear to you on a daily basis.
one of these struggles being how easy you had accepted jake’s request (more like a demand) to break up.
3 days after when you heard his rare yet melodious laugh, one akin to the sound of bells, chime throughout your mind, as it successfully carried onto your ears- you found yourself feeling sick. on a normal day you would be glad to hear it (and the dazzling smile that always accompanied it), but not anymore.
because you had found out that jake had most likely two timed you whilst you guys were together.
if it weren’t for minji texting you after she saw him with a girl on his arms, you wouldn’t have found out.
truly, you owed a lot to your best friend.
minji: y/n- SOS! ur ex is with a girl!
*video attached*
it got cut off but he said “poor y/n, she’s too much of a people pleasing pushover”. WTF!!!!!!
you: seriously? im omw :(
minji: what’s ur eta??
you: be there rn!!
you walked to your car and pinpointed minji’s location on life360 as memories of the breakup filled your subconscious.
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“lets break up.”
as soon as those words were uttered from jake’s mouth, you halted what you were doing and let your eyes slowly flutter up to meet his stare.
at first you assumed he was joking. after all, he had made no prior indication that he wanted to break up with you. though the two of you hadn’t spent as much time together in the previous weeks, you accepted that it was because you both were busy with your own lives and couldn’t be with each other 24/7. and it wasn’t as though you had felt that anything was amiss in the relationship, because the two of you had been peacefully coexisting for a while.
but perhaps you were wrong and he had a different idea of what your relationship was like.
as of now, you just wanted to know why. “oh… is there a reason?”
jake hesitated for a moment, then sighed. “yes, there is.”
before you had the opportunity to ask why, he ruffled his chocolate-esque hair with his hands and answered for you. “it’s really not you, it’s me. i just… don’t feel like right now is a good time for me to be in a relationship. you know?”
you felt something was off with his reasoning. the two of you had been together for 4 years, and jake wanted to break it off out of nowhere because it ‘wasn’t a good time’? what exactly made it not a good time? it didn’t make much sense, but you weren’t the type to throw a fit because of a breakup. you were the paranoid, constantly worried about saying the wrong thing type.
if he had his reasons, then you had to respect that. as much as it broke your heart.
but did you really want to?
“and you couldn’t ask me first before jumping the gun?” you grabbed jake’s hand, more confused than upset by how easily he wanted to break things off and how lazy the excuse felt. “i mean, i-i feel like this came out of nowhere. we’ve been dating for 4 years…” you noticed his expression grow more tired. “i’m sorry, i’m not trying to be rude! i guess i’m just surprised you didn’t say anything about it first.”
“i tried! i just couldn’t bring myself to do it, I guess.” jake pursed his lips, seemingly putting his thoughts together before speaking again. “i like you y/n, i really do, but i just don’t think we work. you have to agree- we haven’t been getting along well these days.”
you gave him a sad smile when you realized that you two had completely different perspectives about your dynamic. he considered it strained, while you considered it peaceful. he thought this was a reason to end a relatively long lasting relationship while the thought hadn’t even crossed your mind.
because after all, you loved him too much to even consider that.
“i guess you’re right.” you lied. you couldn’t agree to his judgment, but you couldn’t speak up about it either.
before jake could open his mouth in response, you spoke up again. “as much as i don’t want to do it, I'll have to respect your wishes. it’s for the better if we did… you know…” you looked at jake with tears beginning to cloud your vision. “break up. i’m sorry.”
the perturbed male let out a breath, as you could tell he attempted not to roll his eyes. you felt your heart crack with every action he took, each one somehow upsetting you more than the last. “yes, y/n. we’re done. i can’t handle us anymore.”
and with that you retired into your room, searching for anything and everything to make you feel his presence once more.
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“he’s been totally lying!!” you whisper yelled to minji, the two of you watching the couple from a distance. in any other circumstance it would be weird. but considering how clear it was that he broke up with you for her, you didn’t feel bad. “talking about how he wasn’t ready for a relationship… not ready my ass!”
minji put an arm on your shoulder in consolation. “you deserve better than that.”
“damn right i do.” you said, the apparent anger being a cover for the sadness you truly felt deep down. of course you wanted to run back to him and act as though everything was normal, but you knew the truth. he stopped being yours long ago.
it was truly absurd. you had spent hours upon hours post breakup trying to feel alright again; trying to fill the hole that jakes abrupt leaving had opened up. but all of that.. for what? just for it to end up being a whole lie? you felt dumb. not just because of how he made you feel, but because of how you had to pretend to be angrier than you actually were in order to actually be angry about it. it wasn’t that you didn’t feel angry, but rather that the sadness was more prevalent.
you wanted jake to see what he had done to you, to see how he had betrayed you. but passive, people pleaser y/n wasn't the type to confront people.
“hey y/n, you ready to get this show on the road?” jay, a close friend of jake’s, smirked as he grabbed your waist.
you chuckled in response, not hesitating to place a rushed kiss on his cheek. “ready as i’ll ever be.”
such a shame, jake didn’t know who he was dealing with.
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authors note. 🤓🤓🤓 this is kind of ass im ngl part 2 coming soon maube
permanent taglist. @muhwaa @hoori @yizhoutv @ja4hyvn @carayat @one16core @enhacolor @haerinz @soobin-chois @en-boyz @ohmy-fandoms @yeongwonie @yjwonz @yunki4evr @strwberrydinosaur @duolingofanaccount @iichaeyj @eundiarys @ineedaherosavemeenow @chaerybae @bubblytaetae @w3bqrl @xiaoderrrr @jaeyunnsworld @rikizm (if u requested to be on my permanent taglist and u didn’t get tagged it’s bc i cant see ur acc, but pls dm me if u want to be in it !)
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irishmammonagenda · 3 months
Note
Hii!! 🧚‍♀️It's Wee Emo anon 🍾
Really liked your last work, so here i am again
Can i request brothers reaction on MC who cry over small things?
Like they see little kitten on the street and - WHOOP! - they're bubbling sobbing mess
I'm kinda can't cry (sounds dramatic lol) and wanna MC to feel it instead of me 😬
Love your works, keep going bestie💐🏃‍♂️
HI WEE EMO <3 please ignore the fact you sent me this on april 27th and its now june i had gcses to prepare for 😔✊
anyway, who let you into my house 😧🤨
no seriously i've cried at multiple south park episodes. south park. sometimes i wanna cry when i see my dog i cannot be trusted i tear up so easily especially when im writing🙁
for not being able to cry that is not very good for you fr:
i used to not be able to cry + still only really tear up, some tears drip down and let out like 2 sobbing sounds before im good again, i dont even have to try and stop crying, two sobs and im done, but my biggest tip is, get tired like really sleepy to the point where your eyes water bc of tiredness then watch something really sad.
i ha to literally train myself to be able to cry again bro dw, i wish i could have a big long cry but like 3 mins of crying is better than none, trust me wee emo you'll feel better
#dontbottleupyouremotions
ANYWAY:
this was very hard to imagine their reactions to idk why, but i tried so 😔✊
grma wee emo for requesting <3 and grma everyone else for reading <3
Obey Me Brothers With a Sensitive MC <3
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It was safe to say you were sensitive, back when Melanie Martinez's music was a lot better, you really could say that the song 'Crybaby' pretty much encapsulated your entire being, it still did, but you liked to think you were more mature in your music taste now. (You weren't)
Being suddenly catapulted into the Devildom did a number on your emotions, and you found yourself quite numb. But as you adjusted, and bonded with the others, you found that you were back to your usual self, which was a crybaby.
So then how do the brothers react?
LUCIFER
Great. Two Mammons.
At least Mammon No.2 (you) isnt a tsundere about it.
Lucifer does not like seeing you cry. Even if its because something is cute, (although he does find it quite adorable, not that he'd admit it)
This demon is of the opinion that tears should never disgrace your beautiful eyes.
He will invite you to listen to his records with him and purposely put on sad ones or really sweet ones so you grip onto him while you tear up,
He is a demon, after all. ;)
MAMMON
Finally. Someone who cries more than him!
It actually makes him feel safer around you, like you wont bully him for being more sensitive than his brothers.
Actually ends up dropping a lot of his tsundere act around you.
You watch movies together, but always have to check the Devildom version of 'doesthedogdie.com'
Idk, I feel like Mammon would give you a bit of bother for it at first but then slowly start to like, open up more, because he really does see himself in you like that.
LEVIATHAN
He blanks.
One day you start crying because of how cute the anime you both were watching was, Levi thought you were geniunely upset, so he tried to cheer you up.
You end up thinking that its really sweet and start crying harder.
Leviathan PANICKS.
Even now, he still gets really nervous when you start crying, and has popped into his demon form more times than he can count when you grab onto him and sniffle.
Please he's already so awkward he can't handle how cute you are.
You might make him start crying as well :(
SATAN
Satan 100% gets so angry he starts crying so he can kind of understand it.
He's just glad you cry over positive things :)
His favourite moment was definetly when you teared up over a small kitten. (He took several photos and also took the kitten home)
Like Lucifer he 100% invites you to read with him and picks the fluffiest most adorable romance he can find, or the saddest most heartbreaking romance he can find.
He likes when you cling onto him and look up at him with those big teary eyes.
He's a demon. What did you expect, ;)
ASMODEUS
He thinks you're adorable.
Any emotion on your face is adorable to him actually. <3
If you wear makeup he makes sure to get you waterproof mascara and other eye makeup so your beautiful tears dont ruin your beautiful makeup <3
If any of you remember that crying girl makeup trend? Yeah he deffo starts that up in the Devildom (a) to make you feel less embarrassed about it and (b) because he thinks youre so beautiful when you express yourself.
BEELZEBUB
He doesn't cry a lot, it's not exactly something that comes naturally to him at all.
Its not that he CANT cry or that he holds his tears back, its just that he doesn't normally process or reaction to things with tears.
Only in serious serious situations will he cry.
So when he sees you crying over one of those little onigiri things that are literally adorable, he thinks that you've somehow hurt yourself. (i nabbed this off of pinterest)
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Beel panics, and mentally goes over the ingredients in his head, did he order something with an ingredient that was dangerous to humans?
He calms down when he realises that you're crying because it looks cute.
He feels you with that.
Makes an effort to take you to more places with food items displayed in cute ways.
Though you do have to look away while Beel cuts them up for you, otherwise you wouldnt be able to eat it.
BELPHEGOR
He laughs at you.
Point blank.
Originally when he's in the attic he uses your sensitivity as a way to manipulate you.
But post lesson 16, he really starts to appreciate it more.
This bastard will use his powers as the youngest sibling against you, he'll dress up in cute onesies and give you puppy eyes, all to coax you into taking naps with him.
Which you do.
I have no idea how half of these fuckheads would react tbh
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x0x0josephinex0x0 · 9 months
Note
hi okay so idk if your reqs are open rn (if not oops im really sorry) but pls plsplspls could you do svt with a socially exhausted introverted s/o (just coups if not svt) (this is totally not based on me and how absolutely tired i am of social gatherings) please only do it if you are inspired and have time! Dont force yourself!!! Also lysm youre doing great
ABSOLUTELY I will do this for you (also hi very rude of you to call me out like this, i am ur resident socially exhausted/overstimulated introvert gf) but since you brought up cheol I can't stop thinking about it for him and it fits so well! so here you go my lovely!! so: cheol with his socially exhausted s/o, or you can't filter your thoughts when you're peopled out and accidentally tell seungcheol you want to marry him (and maybe have his kids) gn reader, this is all meant to be comforting and cute, there are mentions of gambling at the beginning, pet names are used (baby, honey).
It's seven in the evening and Seungcheol has to settle a bet.
"Sorry guys. It's over." He throws in his cards, tosses some spare bills onto the table, and grabs his coat while the other boys groan.
"You owe me $50," Vernon says in English to Joshua, who shakes his head in disappointment.
Seungcheol decidedly will not be telling you about how the guys had bet how long you'd be able to last at your social engagement before texting him to come get you. Almost nobody had had any faith in you, and Seungcheol privately hoped they were right because you'd been so busy lately and he'd been missing you, but he knew that you'd be grumpy about people betting against you.
He's almost giddy, skipping to his car and humming along to the music as he drives to come pick you up, but that all changes when he sees you. Normally, not even your introverted nature can keep you from lighting up when you saw Seungcheol, but all you can manage is a tired smile and a wave as he pulls up to the curb where you're waiting.
"Hey baby," you call to him as he hops out of the car to open your door. "How was game night?"
"Boring," he says, wrapping you up in a hug, partially because it's true and partially because he knows how guilty you'll feel if he tells you he was enjoying himself and you pulled him away. (Never mind the fact that he'd leave his own presidential inauguration just to pick up a flower you liked.)
Seungcheol feels you slump against him, and he chuckles. "Tired?"
"You have no idea." This has been a busy and demanding work week for you, not to mention that your family recently moved closer to spend more time with you, and while you're very close, your sometimes demanding social battery is drained, leaving you exhausted, more irritable and emotional than normal, and prone to long episodes of dissociation in public. Even now, you can feel yourself begin to tear up. "I'm sorry for stealing you away."
He sighs, exasperated. "Let's get my baby home to rest."
He keeps one of his hands in yours as he drives. "Thanks for coming to get me," you say as you lean against the side of his car.
"Of course, honey," he says, keeping his eyes on the road. "Thanks for calling me."
If there's one thing Seungcheol will always do for you, it's unconsciously erase all of your anxiety around being a burden. It was one of the reasons it was so easy for you to be around him -- you felt so safe with him. He never made you feel like any favor you asked of him was too much, and he always made it seem like such a privilege to love you the way he did, without you ever even having to say anything. It's this thought that has you smiling at his profile, watching him as he drives until he gives you an uneasy look. "Are you okay?" he asks.
"Yes," you reply easily. "You're a fine man, Choi Seungcheol."
"Did you drink tonight?" he asks.
You swat his arm. "No, I'm just too tired to filter my thoughts. And my thoughts are saying that you're really pretty."
"You are pretty," he says quietly, smiling to himself. "But thanks."
"You're welcome," you say, settling back into the seat and closing your eyes.
By the time you arrive home, you're feeling calmer and less scattered. After parking in the driveway, Seungcheol comes around the side of the car to open your door again. "Can I carry you inside?" he asks hopefully.
"Now?" He's been asking this since you moved in together. "I'm okay, really."
"You look reeeeeeeeeeeally tired," he begs. "What's the point of all this gym stuff if not to carry you across the threshold of our shared residence?"
"Save it for the wedding night, Seungcheol," you tell him, and then the both of you freeze.
Because really, that is the reason you haven't let him yet. Of course, you hadn't planned on telling him that until much, much later, but once again, your social battery being on 5% has gotten you into trouble.
But Seungcheol doesn't seem worried -- in fact, he seems kind of...proud? "Okay," he says staunchly, his chest puffed out. "I will save it for the wedding night. Amazing idea, baby."
You groan as you take his hand to let him help you out of the car. "Forget I said that."
"Not a chance," he says. "Don't worry though. I know you're tired, so I'll wait until tomorrow to ask you about wedding colors."
"Shut up," you giggle.
Seungcheol ushers you into the house and locks the door behind him, following you into the living room where you collapse on the couch. He laughs at the way your face is smushed into the couch cushions before padding into the bathroom and starting the water. You listen as he bumps around the bathroom, too tired to move your head to look at him, but a few minutes later he comes into the living room and crouches beside your face. "Come on, honey," he says quietly, his eyes overwhelmingly kind.
So you take his offered hand and let him lead you into the bathroom, where there is a candlelit bath with rose petals waiting for you. "Is the water okay?" he asks, a little nervous as you test it with your finger.
"It's perfect. Thank you."
"You're perfect," he says softly before leaning in to press a soft kiss to your nose. "I'll be waiting in bed for you."
Seungcheol closes the door quietly behind him as he leaves the room. You, for your part, are once again wondering where you found a man like him as you strip down and slip into the warm water, letting yourself fully unwind for the first time in a week.
You stay in the bath for nearly an hour, but it pays off -- you leave feeling much less frazzled and drained. You're still tired, though, and you're sure Seungcheol can see it on your face as you enter your shared bedroom clad in your pajamas, because he opens up the covers he's already under and motions for you to come into his arms.
You comply, nuzzling your head into his chest like a cat with its favorite patch of carpet, and he brings a broad hand up to cradle the back of your neck -- the spot where he knows you get your tension headaches, which he massages for you on days like today.
"Feeling better?" he asks softly, kissing your forehead.
"Yeah," you say. "Thanks."
You just lay there quietly for awhile, relishing the feel of his hand rubbing firm circles into your neck. You appreciate that he refrains from asking about your night, knowing you may need some time to process before you'll be ready to talk about it. But you know he's wondering, so you decide to give him something, even if it's not much. "It was really fun," you tell him. "It's just been a long week."
"I know, baby." He kisses your forehead again. "I'm impressed with you for going and for how long you stayed. And it's good progress that you called me before you got too overstimulated."
You chuckle. "It was either come home or start throwing things and maiming people."
"You made the right choice," Seungcheol says, and you can hear the grin in his voice.
The moment is so perfect you want to freeze it in time: this man with his arms around you, in the low light of the bedside lamp, and the way you can just be around him without any demands. Your damaged filter, on the other hand, has other plans. "I don't know what I'll do when our kids just want me to be around all the time," you worry aloud.
Seungcheol's arms tighten around you. "Our kids?" he asks quietly, and you cringe.
"I'm exposing myself majorly tonight," you say.
"No, no, it's alright," he says, obviously trying to conceal how gleeful he is. "This version of you is...something else. I really like it."
"I'm sure you do," you grumble, but you muster the strength to look him in the eye. "Just so long as we're on the same page, I don't really mind you knowing I want to marry you and have your kids."
"We are most definitely on the same page," Seungcheol states firmly, leaning down a bit to kiss you. "I was on that page forever ago, so I'm glad you finally caught up."
And as he kisses you again, you think that as long as you've got him to love you whether or not you're capable of controlling your thoughts, any potential bumps in the road you might experience will be alright.
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melobin · 9 days
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“i love all 7 not just one” yet ur so dismissive abt a certain member which clearly isn’t loving all 7 goofy ass. no wonder ur friends with ninona 🤣 both y’all r ot6ers
me when i’m onto nothing the fact you can sit and assume you know how i genuinely feel about ot7 riize is crazy to me. you can continue to think what you want to because i can assure you both ninona and i do not gaf !! im far past the point of caring if people think i negatively of me over the situation with seunghan !! i know i love seunghan ! my friends know it too ! i do not gaf if random people on the internet think differently bc frankly why should i ? i run a smut blog girl im just here to talk about cock 99% of the time 😭
if i’m being completely honest here. i feel like people seem to struggle to grasp the concept that people handle things in their own ways. i’m a very sensitive and emotional person and over the years ive been trying to deal with that in a way where i don’t get hurt so easily. i’ve been dealing with severe anxiety for years i have chronic depression if i sat and thought about seunghan’s hiatus every day i would be completely miserable and worried and that’s not how i want to be i want to be okay i want to feel okay.
grief has never been something i ever get too emotional over it just doesn’t happen, of course it’s sad to not see him there but the way i handle things doesn’t mean i dislike him in anyway shape or form and i’m frankly quite tired of having to explain myself about this. at the end of the day, if seunghan returns it’ll be one of the best things to happen, it’ll make me incredibly happy, i don’t talk about my emotions often but if you want the truth there it is. if he, god forbid, ends up being removed from riize then it will hurt me and i will be upset. i’d rather spend his hiatus in a middle group of knowing there’s realistically a 50/50 chance of him returning and him not rather than sitting and getting my hopes up only to be hurt and upset after.
the way i deal with this hiatus is for my own benefit and my own sanity, i don’t want to be sad all the time, i just barely made it out of a depressive episode and i know if i sat and dwelled on him being on hiatus then i probably wouldn’t have made it out of it. the way i treat the other 6 members is the same way i treat seunghan, i feel the same way about them all, it’s just not as simple to show that when he’s not in gifs or videos or photos.
writing about him is not as easy because i haven’t seen him for months and as time has gone by the other 6 have become more visibly comfortable and free on camera and we never got to see that with him. i love writing for him, his porn plot fic is one of my favourite fics ive written and im always happy to write for him. i just tend to write more for sungchan and eunseok because those are the members i am more sexually attracted to, im a slut man idk what you want me to say. people rarely send asks about seunghan, they’re mainly about sungchan and anton and there’s nothing i can do about that. if people send asks about him, i answer them? if they don’t then i dont, i can’t answer something that isn’t there.
i don’t mean to post such a long rant but frankly i’m just tired of having to say the same thing over and over. no, i don’t care if you think badly of me over it, i don’t care for people who think they know how i feel about something and act as if their opinion is the be all end all. so thank you for sending this so i could freely express my feelings about this.
and DAWG leave ninona out of this as well !!! she expressed why she doesn’t write for him and i touched on my own feelings about writing for seunghan. i never once viewed her in a negative way, she’s one of the funniest people ive had the pleasure of befriending and no, she doesn’t hate seunghan either !
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azuritethehermit · 27 days
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Could you please write something angsty to do with the soul sharing in season 8 and Mumbo removing the waffle recently, it is such fanfic material
Maybe along the lines of Grian feeling his soul return and checking in on Mumbo to confirm his suspicions, and then confrontation? 👀
Pretty please
I've been feeling very angsty lately, maybe its the teenager in me. Im going to pour all my feelings into this
It's a little short and it has a happy ending but it is angsty.
(DISCLAIMER: I'm writing abt their personas and not the people in real life.)
Mumbo felt bad. Really bad. He had been avoiding Grian and Grian knew it. It hurt his feelings. He didn't know what he did wrong.
He wanted to ask Mumbo, but he knew it would only bring them farther apart.
Grian then felt a small surge of energy, and he knew what had happened. He knew it was over. Everything they had fought for, everything that they had worked for. It was all gone when Grian felt his own soul return to his body.
He almost imagined it couldn't be real. Everything wasn't over, was it? Mumbo was his best friend, maybe more than his best friend he didn't really know, but now that was all gone.
The best Grian could do was suck it up and talk to Mumbo, but he was so upset. He was angry and sad, and he felt so many emotions at once that he didn't really know what to do. All these thoughts swirled through his head of their relationship, whatever it was, being over and gone just like that.
There had to be some logical Mumbo explanation for this. Sure, they hadn't talked in a few weeks, but he didn't think Mumbo would just stop protecting his soul.
He had half a mind to march himself over to the Magic Moutain Shopping District. He knew Mumbo would be in that damn lab. It was all he ever did anymore was testing, testing, and more testing. Of course, Grian was upset he'd been losing out on valuable moments with Mumbo, and it seemed like Mumbo didn't even care.
So he honestly couldn't think of anything else to do except ask Mumbo. He picked himself up off the ground and realized he would have to do it. He knew he would have to tell Mumbo how he felt about him in order for him to understand where this is all coming from.
He quickly flew into the air, his wings picking his weight up off the ground, easily flying the short distance over to where Mumbo would inevitably be. And there he was, Grian saw Mumbo, he was attempting to tend to the sludge and cancer, that was the green liquid the side of the laboratory was spewing out. The ground and plants seemed to have mutated down the spot where the green sludge ran out. It disgusted Grian in a way, but not enough that he cared more about it than Grian.
Grian swooped down quietly. He wanted to say something, but he wasn't quite sure what that was he wanted to say.
"Mumbo," He said out quietly.
"Grian." Mumbo turned to face the boy, Mumbos appearance almost frightened Grian. He looked tired, more tired than usual, like he hadn't slept in days, and he had these two silver strips of hair drooping down his face. He seemed to stand a couple inches taller as well.
"What had happened to you?" Grian blurts out quietly without thinking.
"To me? I feel great. Better than ever." Mumbo grinned down at the small avian, his teeth showed the sharpness of them apparent.
"You don't look good?" Grian said even quieter this time.
"What?" Mumbo said, confused, cooking his head to the side. "No Grian, I feel amazing."
Everytime he said it, Grian felt a stinging pain in his chest, like his heart was being ripped out of his body and he couldn't control his feelings anymore.
"So you feel great?" He almost seemed to shout his voice, getting louder and louder. "I don't feel great, Mumbo. What happened to us?" Grian asked almost pleading.
"I felt it, Mumbo. I felt you give it back." Grians eyes started to form tears and he almost couldnt stand here and look into the eyes of a man he barely knew anymore.
"Give what back..?" Mumbo said. A few seconds passed by, and the realization dawned on him. "Your soul? Grian, no, I-" he placed a large hand to the back of his head, feeling the place where the little criss cross should be.
"I had no idea." He said quietly.
"You had no idea?" Grian was starting to get upset again, "you had no idea after everything we've been through together?" Grian asked him, taking a step through the atomic sludge to be closer to Mumbo.
"No Grian, you don't understand, I didn't give it back." He placed his hands on Grians shoulders, "I would never, you know I love you."
"Love me? You haven't been around in ages. It feels like you've forgotten about me. Like I'm just old news, is that it Mumbo? Am I old news? Are you gonna throw me away just like all this." He gestures around to all the pollution he's created. "You made your choice a long time ago, and I'd hate to think you were going back on that."
Grian takes a deep breath, and Mumbo just stands there he has an almost horrified expression on his face. "I still have yours." Grian reaches into his pocket and pulls out a little trinket. It holds Mumbos' soul.
"You're not getting it back." Grian grips it in his hand, "You're not getting it back because I love you, and I always have."
Mumbo looks petrified, like he doesn't know what he's done. What Grian just said to him felt like a confession of love, a declaration one might say. "Grian, I-" Mumbo pauses. "I don't know what to say." He looks down, and for a moment, he waits, and then he grabs one of Grians hands.
"Please," Mumbo breathes out, "give me one more chance. I'll treat you better this time." His other hand drifts up into the others' hair, feeling the matching criss cross he used to have.
"I'm scared of you, Mumbo." Grian says quietly but enough that Mumbo can hear.
"You trusted me before, trust me again. I can be a better holder for you." Mumbo says gently, squeezing the others hand.
Grian thinks for a second before squeezing his hand back. "Okay." And with Grians permission, Mumbo pulls him into a kiss. The kiss was passionate enough that both could feel the energy surge in a stupidly romantic way.
After a few moments Mumbo pulled away and Grian looked at him, he looked less tired. Still the grey streaks were there but he felt the tallers scalp and there were the scars. Grian smiled before pulling Mumbo into a hug.
"I'm so sorry" Mumbo breathed out.
"Never leave me again," Grian said just as breathily, and he had a hint of fear behind the words. Of course, he wouldn't want anything bad to happen to them. There was nobody he loved more than Mumbo Jumbo.
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beecanons · 10 months
Text
Regressor Astarion
[regressor astarion]
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no one asked for this but @hewasanamericangirl inspired me <33
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this man is babey he just is i dont make the rules
probably todler to pre-teen ranges
of course drinks blood from a sippy cup
if you dont give him a pacy he will start biting kinda like teething, but will actually bite pacy sooths
clingy and snuggly insists on cuddles, holding hands/holding onto someone, snuggles demands to sit in your lap or he will sulk on the floor
"astarion no" you recieve the cutest, saddest pout he can muster
will take naps when grumpy but only if he gets cuddles
very fussy doesnt like being told no, always wants to get his way not fussy to the point he'll throw a full fit, but he'll whine and pout and sulk and whatever he can till he either gets bored, tired or finally gets a yes. whichever comes first
likes picture books and story time
easily distracted by sparkly, shiny things super easy to keep him busy cuz hes attracted to it like a cat and a lazer pointer
if hes actually upset he'll find a space to be alone to sulk but a hug and a kiss on the head makes up for it
any companion or tav could be his cg especially tav
or possibly tav or companions could be fellow regressors theyre having a playdate watch them close tho make sure lil 'starion doesnt bite anyone
there are moments where he absolutely will cry and has if hes left alone too long, really wants something and cant get it/have it and hes very fussy to the point none of his usual tactics have worked so hes out of options
baby loves nicknames "lil 'starion", "little star", "handsome boy" and stuff like that very cute, adors them and will respond immedietly to those in fact, he has accidentally regressed when called nicknames offhand. "hey star, could you-?" "mhm??" cutest bright-eyed stare like a cat begging to be pat.
if you ask him to help with a task he will but only on the promise of praise and snuggles
happy cries if you give him headpats when he struggles to regress struggles quite a bit but not so often this happens a lot theres plenty of other ways to help theres just a few times where he will cry if you give him headpats durring a particularly difficult time regressing. he just gets so frustrated then suddenly he gets soft attention (pat pat) and its exactly what he needed.
generally cries out of relief after eing overwhelmed emotions are really hard for a baby please be patient
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hope you liked these! feel free to request more, something specific or something entirely different!
im always happy to write fics on @/hymn-of-muse as well!
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