#im weird and funny and slightly insane

[d3l3t3d-deactivated]

meow

[boxwinebaddie]

oh my god so i just saw this picture of froy guitterez with a bearded dragon and i fear i am going to have to give clyde a bearded dragon. i'm not sure how he got her, ( prolly by doing something extremely impulsive, dumb and unhinged ), but he snuck her into him and tolkien's dorm room and was like "okay! so don't get mad BUT--"

...he was Mad, btw. but rm!tolkien doesn't scream because he is a dignified british king ( the only one i respect ) and just speaks at a slightly louder volume and does things with his eyebrows like "Why. Do. You. Have. A. LIZARD. Clyde?" and he's like "okay, first of all, she's not JUST a lizard; she's a Bearded Dragon and her name is-" idk what her name is it's probably something insane like glizzy or salamanda or mary guana, i want to start crying, oh my god. clyde loves reptiles.

and tolkien is like "right...so does 'glizzy' have a cage? food?...water?" and clyde is just staring at him blankly like, "damn. i didn't think about that." KHSSDLKSDH HELP so they go to a lil pet store, i think they figure out a clever way to keep her warm and make her a strange makeshift enclosure. tldr, she gets all set up...except they have to Hide her ( also prolly in some elaborate way ) bc they're not supposed to have pets in the dorms and at first, tolkien was so Anti-Glizzy, like he made clyde put up lost lizard ads online/stuff on craigslist...

...buUUUUt accidentally got attached to her and secretly took the all listings down. anyways, happy pride month ft. rm!tyde co-parenting a lizard daughter together. the world is a beautiful place, in fact. <3

[yongseungkim]

.

[inamagicalhallucination]

headcanon atsushi’s ability the tiger does not know what to do when it likes someone

like in general atsushi is bad with knowing what to do with the ppl he likes and showing affection -- like he tries to mimic others but he himself is still working on something that feels natural if that makes sense

but the tiger

the tiger is far worse becuz the only positive thing it can associate with positive emotions is food so every time it gets closer to the full moon the tiger starts whispering in the back of his mind that he should eat dazai and kunikida

then kyouka and junichiro

and ranpo and yosano and fukuzawa and kenji and naomi and haruno

at first atsushi panics (naturally) worries he’s a cannibal, thinks the tiger hates the agency, panics more, especially after dead apple when he and the tiger gained an understanding of each other and he realized that the tiger was protecting him so he’s like why r u trying to kill the agency members

but gradually he realizes that actually the tiger just doesn’t know how to deal with positive emotions and yeah

anyway:

atsushi: dazai-san is so nice to me :)

the tiger: yeah :)

the tiger: we should eat him

atsushi: NO????

//

kunikida, patting atsushi’s head: good job on ur report atsushi

the tiger: use his arm against him and eat him

kunikida: atsushi u look weird are u feeling unwell

atsushi: hahaha dont worry about no weird thoughts here hahahaha

//

atsushi, literally just working:

the tiger: the small candy one eats a lot of sugar. he would taste sweet. Eat him.

atsushi: NO??????????????

ranpo, looking up: i’ve actually always wondered what i would taste like-

//

and so on

is this incredibly dumb? yes but is it also funny, yes

atsushi realizes he likes akutagawa because at some point when he spots him the tiger immediately starts wondering what he’d taste like

atsushi, sees akutagawa: oh there’s that basta-

the tiger: i bet he’d taste really nice

atsushi:

atsushi: oh 

atsushi: oh no

//

akutagawa: how did you figure out you liked me?

atsushi: i couldn’t stop thinking about what you’d taste like

akutagawa, blushing: oh-

atsushi: yeah it was insane how much the tiger wanted to kill and eat u

akutagawa, slightly confused and horrified: oh-

//

eventually as atsushi learns to deal with his feelings so does the tiger but unfortunately it’s still an animal so its more like

atsushi: dazai’s so nice :)

the tiger: yeah :)

the tiger: lets hunt a deer for him 

atsushi: no??????????????

//

kunikida, petting atsushi’s hair: good job on the job atsushi

atsushi, not thinking about what he’s saying: kunikida i like u so much should i kill a bear for u?

kunikida, slightly confused, slightly flattered: uhh no???????

//

atsushi, at the store: lemme just get something for kyouka-

the tiger: we shall hunt until we find something suitabl-

atsushi: no.

//

atsushi: im sorry i transformed last night, snuck out of ur place, hunted down a goose, broke back in, left it in the living room table, and then climbed on top of u, still a tiger, and then fell asleep and only transformed back now, after u had to use rashomon to get tiger me off u 

akutagawa, dead tired: yeah i don’t know what the appropriate response is but ur cleaning the bloo-

akutagawa: wait wtf do u mean theres a dead goose in the living room

atsushi: do u not like goose :(

akutagawa: that is NOT the issue here

//

yeah

[boydepartment]

ོ༘₊⁺☀︎₊⁺⋆.˚ from the start (trips) - nishimura riki x m! reader

inspired by this cover - angst - masterlist - wc 250-300 -> PT 2

riki absolutely hated your tendency to have new crushes almost weekly. you were his best friend ever and something that kept him from going insane. riki always had busy schedules so being able to hang out w you once in awhile helped balance it.

there was just one thing, you were a hopeless romantic and would crush on anything breathing. and normally this didn’t bother him but now for some reason

it was.

it was REALLY bothering him.

riki didn’t know what was wrong with him, he watched you as you started to wash his face, bumming off his products and clothes.

he liked when you both shared clothes, having the same style helped a lot. he liked shopping with you too, how your eyes would light up a bit seeing something. or when you guys went out to get coffee and you’d know his order.

but you were his friend. yeah…

“oh and then she said this thing that was just so funny it had me cracking up and-“

you were ranting about this girl you met in your class, which was weird because riki noted that you mentioned slightly last week that you leaned towards guys which wasn’t a problem for him at all and-

no never mind riki didn’t want to think about that right now.

“she also said this one thing about my hoodie- well your hoodie and-“

“okay okay i get it.” his tone even took him aback, he felt horrible when he noticed you tensed up and turned to him.

your messy hair falling perfectly on your boyish features, the way your eyes looked, the small details on your face. this has been happening a lot, the awkward silences and him staring at you for a little too long. then it clicked…

oh

oh

“i’m sorry- i- i don’t know where that- i’m sorry continue.” riki coughed and looked down at his phone.

he heard you huff and he looked at you again, “i’m not going to talk if you’re just going to look at your phone. in fact you’ve been off this entire hangout dude… i don’t know what the fuck i did to you- god forbid i share about MY day… you get-“

“okay well maybe you’re fucking annoying talking about all your crushes every week, it’s to the point where i tune you out because it’s so fucking irritating!” riki snapped and he now knew where this anger was coming from- jealousy

he watched as your features shifted from anger, to concern, right back to anger, “well fine since i’m SO annoying i guess i’ll leave then.”

riki felt you shoulder check him before walking out of the bathroom, he stood there for two seconds debating.

he could run after you, and risk ruining everything.

or he could stay here in the bathroom and wait till it all blows over the next day- handling it in a very “dude” way. that’s what jake and him do. just handling it the dude way with a quick apology after an argument then it’s over.

but to riki- you weren’t just a dude, you weren’t just one of his guy friends, you weren’t just his best friend, you were more than that.

and before he knew it, his feet were sprinting to the other side of the house where you were slipping your shoes on. panicking he full on tackled you.

“what the hell is your problem?!” you yelled as you hit the floor

“IM JEALOUS OKAY? IM JEALOUS!” riki yelled, holding onto you like you’d disappear

he had no clue what the hell he was doing. he felt crazy- insane even.

he felt you sit up slightly, rubbing your head from the impact and he looked up at you. still holding tightly onto you.

your brows were contorted and confused, you were dazed obviously because of the fall.

“jealous of what, you psycho?!” a small smile started to curl up on your lips, he felt his stomach churn as you kept speaking, “you’re my best friend, some girl won’t change that-“

“no- no it will-“ riki was panicking again, god what was wrong with him?! usually he’s confident and calm what the hell is going on?!

you looked at him again, “riki genuinely i’m not a shitty friend i’m not going to leave you for her that’s a terrible thing for a friend to-“

“i- i-“ he swallowed hard and he did something he is going to regret, he let go of you, he realized just because you said you liked boys, doesn’t mean you necessarily liked him like that, “yeah- yeah sorry… i just got paranoid i guess.”

“stupid.” you laughed and shoved him playfully, you took off your shoes, “since you’re not going to be an asshole anymore let’s finish that movie.” you stood up and riki watched you walk back further into the house. when you turned the corner he turned so he was on his back, he stared at the ceiling.

memories flashed of you and his hangouts, he felt his heart drop.

i guess he’s always loved you from the start

[lovesodakid]

what a tease.

chris x fem!reader

summary: y/n and chris have a ‘weird’ friendship. that friendship took a sexual turn one night. which ultimately led them to being friends with benefits. now, playing card games with everyone with slight teasing between two of them.

warnings: smut!, teasing, dom!chris(ish). should be it. *not proof read*

____________________________________________

“oh my god, nick!” i whine, throwing my face into my hands.

the triplets, madi, and i are all having a game night at the triplets house. we all collectively decided that we needed to have a night to our selves, all of us being so busy with work causing us to almost barely see each other anymore.

nick, matt, and madi sit on the couch as chris and i are sat on the floor in front of the coffee table facing the couch. a deck of UNO cards sitting in a nice stack in the middle of the table, while right beside it, is a messy stack of cards that’s been thrown down by each of us.

nick just threw the +4 card down on me.

“sorry y/n!” he giggles, showing anything but empathy in his face.

i groan before grabbing 4 cards off of the stack, earning myself 2 reverse cards, a +2 card, and a regular blue number 9 card.

chris being after me, he lays down his choice of card before speaking.

“you’re definitely the type to throw tables when you lose a game y/n/n.”

my eyebrows furrow as i shoot him a disapproving look.

“you are so insanely wrong,” i begin. “i might hate losing but i definitely don’t throw tables.”

“i don’t know, you kinda seem like that type.” matt chimes in.

i throw my hands in the air, opening my mouth to speak until i get cut off by nick and madi agreeing while laughing to themselves.

the game continues, music humming at a low volume coming from the tv.

once the game end games with matt winning, we sit around in the same spots, just talking about life and what our plans for the future are.

“i’m working on new designs for second choice right now, i don’t have anything else going on other than that at the moment.” madi explains to all of us.

“can i see some!” nick asks excitedly.

“of course!” madi smiles, grabbing her phone, scrolling on it, seemingly showing nick her designs as he lets out a few ‘oo’s and ‘ahh’s in adoration.

matt, sitting next to them scrolling on his own phone.

chris and i, sitting next to each other, also on our own phones. occasionally showing each other funny tiktoks that’s come across our for you pages.

“here.” chris says. pointing his phone toward me so i can see his screen.

i look over to his phone, expecting some video of someone falling, like he’s showed me pretty much everytime he decides to show me something.

but oh. was i wrong.

when i look at his phone, it’s one of those slide pictures, with a red background. i swipe two times before reading the words on the red screen.

“you look good in clothes. but you’d be looking fine ash without them.”

im surprised my eyeballs didn’t come rolling out of my head by how wide my eyes opened, along with my mouth.

i shake my head, pushing his phone away from me as he lets out a small chuckle.

a few moments go by, occasional conversations between nick and madi, sounds coming from our phones, and the music in the background filling the silence.

until i feel a warmth on my exposed thigh, due to my pajama shorts. i look down, noticing chris’s hand almost completely covering it. god. how i love his hands.

i quickly come out of my trance of staring at his hands as i look up to him, furrowing my eyebrows.

he notices, and mouths a quick “what?”.

i look down to his hand, then back up to him, almost as if to say: “what are you doing?”

with that, he just gives me a cocky grin as he turns his attention back to his phone, keeping his hand on my thigh.

thankfully, it seems like everyone else is in their own little world, completely oblivious to chris’s actions as he slowly and sensually works his hand more upwards. closer and closer to my center until his middle and ring finger are slightly ghosting over the middle of my shorts.

“hey y/n/n, do you want to see my new designs?” madi asks, turning her phone around to face me as she slightly leans over the coffee table.

“sure!” i smile, leaning my own body forward a little bit.

in my peripheral vision, i notice chris’s face being taken over by a sly smirk. before i can question it, i feel a quick up and down motion right on my clothed clit. that’s why he was smirking.

“so…what do you think?” madi asks, excitedly.

i clear my throat to choke back a small moan as his finger movement speeds up. “t-they’re gorgeous!” i chirp back.

she smiles sweetly at me as she leans back into the couch, attention going back to her phone.

i turn my own attention on to not making any sounds as chris continues to speedily move his fingers against me.

i grab his hand with mine, harshly moving it to his own lap as i leave it there. which causes him to quickly snap his head toward me with the most smug grin on his face.

i roll my eyes, turning my phone back on to scroll through instagram.

“hey do you guys wanna bake some brownies?” nick questions the group excitedly.

-

“and now we wait 30 minutes.” madi tells us, setting the pan of uncooked brownies into the oven.

“i don’t know if i can wait that long!” chris groans loudly.

“you’ll be fine kid.” matt chuckles, picking up the trash that was left over from our baking.

i walk over to get the bowl of brownie batter. because everyone knows brownie batter is the best part about brownies.

i swirl the spoon around the bowl, picking up some of the left over mix. i lift it up to my mouth, licking the spoon clean as i hum at the chocolatey taste.

i go to put the spoon back in the bowl to scoop up the rest but i stop as i get the feeling of eyes burning holes into me. i look up, noticing chris staring at my mouth. like his eyes can’t be ripped away.

i smile to myself, scooping up the rest of the batter before i stick my tongue out, slowly licking up the spoon. i hold eye contact with chris as i do so.

“hey y/n…can you come help me pick out an outfit for our next photo shoot?” chris asks, a small hint of urgency lacing his voice.

i nod my head, putting the empty bowl and spoon into the sink.

“don’t take too long, we got brownies to eat!” nick exclaims as chris and i make our way to his room.

well more of chris dragging me to his room.

once we get to his bedroom door, he swiftly opens it, pulling me into the room behind him. he practically slams the door shut as he pushes me against the back of it, pinning me to it.

“what the fuck was that?” he rasped.

i furrow my eyebrows, allowing a playful smirk to spread across my face.

“what?” i question dumbly.

“you know what.” he retorts.

i shake my head side to side. “no i don’t.” i say mockingly.

he lets out a low chuckle before leaning into me, his lips grazing over my ear. i’d be a fool to say the sound of his husky laugh coming from his mouth didn’t turn be on tremendously.

“licking that spoon like that?” he rasps, lifting his left hand to caress the left side of my face as he breaths into my right. “the same way you use that tongue on my dick?”

he closes the gap, his mouth attaching itself on that spot right under my ear.

“chris!” i yelp breathlessly, the tingling in my abdomen becoming almost unbearable from the teasing earlier and now this.

“hmm?” he hums. “what is it baby?” he detaches hisself from me, staring into my eyes.

i whine at the detachment as i return his gaze.

“i need you.” i whine in a whisper.

“mhm.” he hums, a smirk present on his face as he connects our lips.

our lips dance across each other smoothly like a ballerina sways across a stage.

his left hand slides from my cheek to my neck, wrapping his hand around it firmly as he pulls me off the door.

he swiftly turns me around, walking me backwards until the back of my knees hit the smooth frame of his bed.

he intensifies the pressure on my throat. but as quickly as he does, it’s also gone as he uses that to push me onto the pillowy soft comforter of his bed.

my body bounces from the impact before stopping, sinking into the mattress.

he waists no time in using his hands to loop around the waistband of my pajama shorts, yanking them down. they end up finding home somewhere on his bedroom floor.

“god ‘ma. did i do this to you?” he groans, noticing the wet patch in my orange lace underwear. he takes his index finger, running it up and down my clothed folds. repeating his steps from earlier.

my hips buck up, not expecting the sudden motion.

“chris!” i cry out.

“shh baby,” he removes the hand from my center, covering my mouth with it. “don’t want them to hear you, hm?”

i nod my head. he smirks, removing it. “think you can handle being quiet?” he husks, removing his sweatpants.

i nod my head once again, this time at a faster pace than before.

he pushes his red boxers down, stepping out of them. his cock visibly throbbing, needing attention.

he kneels back down between my legs, his hands making their way up the plush of my thighs. once he reaches the lining of my panties, his fingers hook around them before skillfully gliding them down. which also end up making home on his bedroom floor.

“we gotta be quick ‘ma.” he breathes out. referring to the fact that there’s still a house full upstairs.

he crawls over me, using his hands to hold himself up as they come on each side of my head.

“you ready baby?” he cooes, rubbing his hand up and down my clothed stomach. the both of us only being nude from waist down.

“yes.” i whisper, entangling my hand in his hair.

he smiles as he looks down between us. i moan softly as his tip begins pushing into me.

“fuck.” he groans as he bottoms out, his head falling into the crook of my neck.

“move chris, please.” i whimper.

he pulls out, leaving his tip in before he pushes back in at a slow pace.

he continues the slow thrusts, my walls hugging his dick in all of the right ways.

“chris, faster!” i moan out.

almost as if he was waiting for me to say it, he speeds his thrusts. rutting into me at a harsh but pleasurable pace.

“taking me so well, hm?” he grunts into my ear. the rasp of his voice traveling through my ear straight to my pussy.

the tip of his dick continuously kissing the sweet spot inside me, sending me over the edge.

“mm-fuck.” i moan quietly, reminding myself of the people upstairs.

“were you thinking about this when you were licking that spoon like that?” he grunts. “maybe next time you can use that pretty little tongue on my cock?”

i moan in response. his hips snapping into mine at a quick pace.

“chris-i’m gonna cum!” i warn, feeling the coil in my stomach get closer to snapping.

“c’mon baby, cum for me.” his already quick pace speeding.

almost as if my body needed confirmation, the coil snaps immediately. ecstasy coating my body.

“fuck.” chris moans in a grunt. his hips sputtering as he paints my insides white.

we lay with our body’s connected for a moment as we both catch our breaths.

he eventually pulls out, causing both of us to hiss at the slight overstimulation. he walks to his bathroom, grabbing a towel to clean the both of us up.

once we’re both clean, he dresses himself before dressing me.

“let’s head up now, yeah?” he pulls me up, leaving a small kiss on my forehead as i nod.

we both make our way out of his bedroom, back upstairs to join everyone else.

“took you long enough! the brownies are done!” nick yells excitedly. a plate with a half eaten brownie sitting on it. matt and madi sitting with him at the table.

____________________________________________

a/n: i’m so sorry this took so long to get out !! im working on sts 6! and sorry this is so rushed, esp towards the end, i kept zoning out during it so it lowkey kinda sucks lol

(also thank you to @imwetforyourmom and @bernardsbendystraws for lowkey helping me out w this 🙏)

____________________________________________

[daftmooncretin]

rip to rian johnson but star wars sequels would be way better if ben solo was just kinda cowardly and han solo coded so he defected from the jedi and went to be a fun swashbuckling anarchist space cowboy instead

and finn and poe have to find him and try to convince him to come back to the rebellion but hes afraid who he is and what he could become

also instead of luke trying to kill his nephew for NO REASON (so insanely out of character it boils my blood) he just realises after ben dips thats hes not cut out for teaching. and is living on a mandalorian colony as rebellion liason/ambassador with chewie and sometimes lando i guess (din djarin is there) he aids the rebellion (because of course he would fuck that plotline) but he wont stay on the rebel base because he doesnt like all the chosen one clout and mandalorians are very chill and mind their own business

han and leia are still together and play active parts in the rebellion because fuck that plotline too although they do disagree about the ben situation (leia is annoyed and han is understanding) poe and ben childhood friends and for what.

in this au, rey is raised in the empire and is a sith lord but she has doubts and isnt as abjectly disgusting as kylo ren because of course not. (appears slightly too interested in the rebellion when poe is captured and maybe??? possibly lets finn and poe escape but thats up for debate.) rey gets more evil over course of movies before turning to light for plot drama and a satisfying zuko arc.

force awakens timeline

prophecy that a new jedi will rise and take down the dark side. rey and sith lord (dk who but fuck snoke im writing him out) assume it is the missing ben solo (its finn and rey tho fr) and are intent on finding him. movie opens on rey being evil probably and capturing poe. also finn as a character actully needs no real changes hes great. and then next scene space pirate ben solo doing his thing (but without identity revealed so we dont know who he is yet he may go by kylo because funny)

instead of luke poe has a lead on missing almost-jedi before he dipped ben solo and is searching for him on leias orders.(rebellion also believe the prophecy is about him. but nuh uh) torture scene and escape scene doesnt need to change but show reys nuances and how lost she is.

in the interest of narrative poe and finn still crash on tatooine but finn manages to pull poe out of the crash. (finn still gets the jacket at some point because i say so) poe is too injured to fly so they seek out help and and meet ben solo who saves them from pirates or something idk. (but neither know who the other is)

finn and poe convince ben solo to be their pilot still thinking hes a random smuggler named kylo. they get along very well, especially finn and ben. rey by this point is tracking their whereabouts

they end up on that lightsaber planet and ben gets the weird darth vader nightmare and freaks out, (hes afraid of being evil or something idk) poe is getting suspicious now also finn feels the force and takes up the lightsaber. rey comes and finn trys to hold her off. finn get hurt and drops lightsaber. ben is forced to take it up and his identity is revealed as rebel reeforcements led by han and leia arrive and they see him fighting. rey and ben have a weird charged moment (yes i guess i am still making reylo a thing but its reyben now and its woke so shh) and in a dramatic desperate effort he manages to knock her lightsaber away with the force. poe crawls into a plane at somepoint and blows up reys ship. the rebels destroy the stormtroopers but rey captures finn and escapes in a stolen ship.

ben has a oh-shit-i-said-id-never-use-the-force-again related existential crisis which makes him freak out and leaves. a distraught finn-less poe calls him a coward. poe picks up the discarded lightsaber and the jackettm and sadly packs them up. leia tells him about the starkiller and poe volunteers to go on the starkiller and save finn. han and leia have a sweet moment and han decides to go with poe on the suicide mission, chewie goes too.(chewie arrived at somepoint i guess)

mid hostage situation finn blocks reys force attempt and shes shook up. he sees something in her (finn is a beautiful sweetheart) and he trys to appeal to her. she force chokes him and books it out of there. but it is clear she fears him a little. he escapes with mind tricks and runs into han poe and chewie on the deck. finnpoe moment fr. poe gives him his jacket back in order to get the keep it it looks good on you line.

meanwhile ben is back on his ship(i guess its the falcon?) and he thinks about finn and his mom and luke or something.. a dream maybe?? idk something emotional and motivational for his arc. and he goes to a box under the floor in his ship and pulls out a green lightsaber. he turns the ship around.

on the ship poe finn han and chewie are planting the bombs and escaping when they get stopped by stormtroopers ordered by rey. poe is about to be shot by a big droid thing when it is cut in half by ben wow big reveal hes here oooo ah. rey is shot in the shoulder by chewie and angrily orders more stormtroopers. they cant take them all. han sacrifices himself by blowing up the bridge. he tells finn and poe to find luke in the mandolorian colony ben is distraught him and han have an emotional goodbye he tells him to tell leia he’s sorry and that he loves him and he proud of him then he makes chewy get ben out of there and he blows himself up. leia senses it v sad rip man but he had to die to intensify plot drama

rey chases them onto the ice planet and another weird charged moment. mind link established??? this time ben is too angry and grieving though so its not a good match and she wounds him real bad all over hes v scarred now. poe shoots at rey and throws lightsaber at finn. he gets ben onto the ship and finn and rey have the big force awakens show down. finn uses the force v powerful all that jazz the good guys get away. on the ship finn mentions how he felt a connection with rey to poe and claims he sees good in her

movie ends with meeting luke on mandolore. ben is very traumatised wont really speak to finn or poe and avoiding luke. finn returns lukes lightsaber and rey has doubts movie over. movies ends with ominous rey ben mind link

final notes (on first movie and overarching rewrite plans)

finn

finn is the protagonist of this movie so it would be much more character heavy on him them the original. more in depth on his stormtrooper trauma, how he always chooses the people he loves over the cause and his reluctance to join the rebellion. his friendship with poe and the han/leia parallel’s especially. relationships with han and ben important for his character exposition and he plays a key role in supporting both rey and bens character progression. possesses the strong sense of mercy and kindness at the heart of the star wars franchise.

rey

rey is raised in the first empire and does not know anything different. when she meets finn who was able to rebel and escape from the same system she is trapped in she becomes plagued by doubts and projects all of her hatred and resentment onto finn to compensate, but it is clear she fears him. to escape from her doubts she fixates on finding and capturing ben solo imagining him to be a frightening and terrible adversary. however when she meets him they see eachothers minds, and she sees how plagued by doubt and fear he is, how he runs from everything and he sees her too. they connect and develop a strange mutual fascination/understanding. this is put askew by finns appearance at the end of the movie in defence of ben. reys fear of finn increases when she sees the true extent of his power. she fears and hates equally finns strength of character and easy goodness and by extension hates ben for his alliance with finn. she blames finn for “taking” ben from her.

ben solo

kylo ren is a disgusting blight on the star wars names so ben solo is being completely reclaimed by me into a different character because i fucking hate that stupid pretentious eboy. instead ben solo is an incredibly han solo coded character with a heart of gold and deep love and loyalty to his friends and family. his main weakness as a character in this rewrite is his fear and lack of self belief. ben is terrified of being a jedi and of his own power. he fears his own nature and was so afraid he would become his grandfather that he ran from the jedi altogether. ben solo is a runner that wont face his problems, he runs from the jedi and from his parents to avoid failing or becoming something terrible. finn and ben recognise the need to run in eachother (although important distinction finn runs because he doesn’t want to fight for a cause. and ben runs because hes afraid he will be the reason the cause fails) and ultimately encourage eachother to break the cycle and stand their ground (well finn motivated ben in this movie, finns not fixed yet.) Bens arc in these movies is about learning to live with his own nature and fighting for what he believes in despite his fear. also dealing with mommy issues (ben is kind of jealous of poe and leias relationship the son she wanted or something blah blah blah etc) and being a malewife to his murder girlfriend. his job is kind of to support and fight with finn and later rey and help them save the world

finnpoe (will be a gay couple)

their friendship will be front and centre in these movies because they represent duty vs personal loyalty. poe puts the cause above all else and values his own life and personal relationships little. finn on the other hand is disillusioned with establishment cause of stormtrooper trauma and wants to protect himself and others from it. poe is the first person that finn truly bonds with and loves. he puts poe above everything, including being a jedi and the rebellion. this leads to a lot of fighting and discord between finn and poe as finn doesn’t understand how important the rebellion is to poe and poe doesnt get why finn is trying to protect him from it. ultimately though poe teaches finn faith and belief and finn teaches poe to accept love and value himself. (also many hanleia parallels) the two of them are the harbingers of a new age. poe as future leader of the new republic and finn as the jedi messiah or whatever. in terms of romance, im thinking slowburn. baity first movie, kiss at the end of the second and established relationship by the halfway mark of the third.

also when rey eventually joins the light in the beginning she refuses to talk to ben (cause of romantic drama i havent thought of yet but centres around some sort or betrayal in the second movie) or finn (because hes her narrative foil and slow burn best friend forever) so her first friend is poe and she kind of follows him around in her first few months before she eventually bonds with finn 4eva. her poe shadowing has lots of cute friend moments where they fly together and he tries to talk her down about finn and the ben drama but also more importantly it foreshadows her leadership ability and tactical mind as she gives him advice and aids him with the rebellion behind the scenes (also leads to leia taking rey under her wing probably because poe is her surrogate son and mirror) which will eventually lead to her and poe leading the republic together because in my mind rey is a jedi but actively a member of republic government because ben can’t do politics and finn won’t but shes great at it so she’d be a perfect jedi liason and vice president to poe. meanwhile finn and ben lead the jedi. finn as a knight travelling across the galaxy and ben as a teacher. (luke is happy in retirement rn on mandalore but leia is still probably an advisor in the republic because retirement is definitely not for her) and everyone is happy the end. force ghost han solo is clapping.

[prettyb0ycvnt]

hi freaks of tumblr . here's my introduction post teeheehee <3

my name is aiden ! i am an eighteen year old gay trans man - pre-op and pre-t unfortunately ... but whatever im still hot. giggles and twirls hair.

more about me :3

☆ freakiest virgin you've ever met. i'd like that to CHANGE but uhhghhh the most i can get is freaks on tumblr (hit me up lalalala)

☆ real life prince charming pupboy :3 !!!

☆ literally not an ounce of dominance inside me at ALL i'm very submissive!!!! to an insane extent!!!

☆ bottom.

☆ perpetually in heat actually. need that to be rectified

☆ bst timezone. british twink moving like Oh Good Heavens... Oh My... Good Grief...

☆ my asks are open all the time to anyone! dms are open for mutuals only. please do not message me with sexual intention if you are a woman (im a faggot) (please do message me if you're an older man!!!! i love older men!!! i love all men!! please message me if you're a man!!!! or nb!!! please!!) also feel free to dm or ask me stuff if you just wanna be friends!!! blank blogs do not message me it weirds me out x

☆ i'm a writer! my posts may tend to get real descriptive if i'm not hornied-out beyond all comprehensive thought!!

☆ i am transgender and a lot of the stuff i post will focus on this :3 !!! my posts will reference fem biology but i'm not a girl don't call me one or i'll rip my hair out and die.

☆ im a GAY MAN!!! please don't repost my stuff if you're a cishet blogger or a 'men dni' blog im literally a. man and i love men and i talk about loving men and im the antithesis of everything u stand for . all queer freaks (including. wlw!!!) can do whatever they want with my posts :3

☆ some of my non-freakish interests include acting, literature, writing, baking, reading and certain fandoms that i don't want to explicitly reference in case this post appears to them uhm feel free to ask me about them!!!

claimed anons: 😵💫 ; 👾

dni: minors, MAPs, bigots of any kind, trans fetishisers, ed & sh blogs, ageless blogs, weirdo freaks of the bad kind!!

interactions disclaimer: i don't accept nudes, nor will i send any. buuut i'm totally open to any sort of conversation you wanna have with me :3 !! please keep my limits in mind they're down below...!

tags

#☆ aiden's corner -> silly thoughts of mine!! sometimes they r Slightly lesser hornyposting... sometimes they're just funny things ithink of. welcum to aiden's corner !!

#☆ aiden's freakish thoughts -> hornyposting to the maxxxx.... under this tag im a FREAAKKK

☆ reblogs -> stuff i find relatable or stuff i find super duper hot . perhaps both at the same time!!

#☆ anon -> answering anonymous asks!

#☆ asks -> when used alone, answering non-anon asks! also used in conjunction with #☆ anon :3

me if u even care

okay thats all i can think of rn ummm anyway. stuff i'm into & limits under the cut :3

i looove >_< !!! praise, degradation, breeding, petplay, major voice kink!, exhibitionism, voyeurism, humiliation, objectification, free-use, cockwarming, royalty, dumbification, somnophilia, forcemasc and ummm probably more you should totes talk to me so we can find out!

limits >:[ !!! detrans/misgendering, forced feminisation, scat, bestiality, watersports, blood, basically any bodily fluids that aren't cum or spit, anything to do with feet, feederism, weight gain/weight loss, incest/fauxcest, ageplay, extreme cnc, rape, daddy/mommy, pregnancy, basically everything else that's super fucking weird and unethical. -> if you're into these things that's totally fine!! i'd just prefer they're not brought up in regards to myself ^_^

bodily terms for myself :3 not on t nor have i had surgery so i still very much have female parts and im fine with them being referred to as such!!! acceptable terms include cunt, pussy/boypussy, slit, hole, clit, chest, tits, (t-)cock& (t-)dick !! all i ask is that the term vagina is not used.

things i like being called >_< please refer to me with masculine or neutral terms, nothing feminine. degrading terms like whore, bitch, slut and any other varieties (cumslut, etc.) are 100% okay! in fact please call me them!! praising terms like good boy are wooonderful. call me puppy/pup and ill explode and die (in a good way!!!) tbh literally call me anything as long as its not feminine and i'll love it. lalalalaa

[sometipsygnostalgic]

Due to a series of unfortunate events (a cancellation of all direct flights for 2 days), im going to be spending between 90 minutes and three hours in IRELAND of all places. The REPUBLIC of Ireland. I was not expecting this on my american adventure.

I wont get to do any irish things but im flying both flights with Aer Lingus instead of British Airways.

Here is my review of Aer Lingus which is by extension my review of Ireland:

- Holy SHIT this airbus is half the size of the boeing i was going to take. I expected it to have insane turbulence like the KLM washing machines but honestly it's no different to the boeing

- it is nice to hear announcements made in a celtic language first again, even if it's Gaelic and not Cymraeg. I look forward to seeing the "Casnewydd/Newport" sign when i finally take the train home, it's the first symbol of being in Wales.

- We left early. EARLY. On one hand this is leagues above all my BA flights that have never left on time. On the other hand if it left just 60 seconds late, id have recieved a free change of transfer plane. Now i gotta hope we get there "early" enough for me to get through customs and find my next flight. Better prepare to run but theres not much i can do about this. I just hope British Airways dont force me to pay for a rebooked flight because they decided 60 minutes international transfer time was enough (hah!) and i dont have superhuman speed.

- Im sat by an emergency exit. This has funny side effects. I get sliiiightly more leg room, but also im sat by the exit and the door is way, way colder than any other wall in the plane. It's not bothersome but it's funny how i have a free Cooling Wall.

- Internet is about same price as BA and i can use discord (good) but i cant use youtube (very bad, you should probably only go for for the im service)

- The dinner was about the same quality as the British airways food, but they had TWO meat options instead of one. I took the Beef Stew. Very yummy. They had cheese and tomato on the side instead of the cursed tomato couscous yoghurt that looks like strawberry muesli which british airways keep serving (prison food). I also really liked the chocolate mousse, slightly easier to eat than the chocolate brownie i get with BA, but i find it weird aer lingus serve most of their drinks in tiny cartons. Why??? At least i get a tiny water bottle with BA, like a souvenir. Also theres a tinier bread roll and no cheese with it, but the cheese felt out of place anyway. Not as out of place as the tiny creamer pot i get on both airlines, with no coffee in sight. It's like a shot.

- you dont get any free alcohol on this flight, you have to pay for your 1 can can of lager. With a credit card. Mine was in the overhead locker. Thankfully a guy on my aisle was feeling generous and bought my can. Downgrade from BA including 2 alcoholic drinks in the flights

- instead of a nice pasty or bacon egg roll for breakfast they gave me a tiny carton of orange juice and a Nature Valley granola bar. Horrible

- the in flight entertainment is on a screen from 2009 instead of 1999. There is no funny controller that stops working randomly. It is a normal ass touch screen. Unfortunately i lost my provided earbuds at the start of the flight so i havent done anything with it

- no reclining chair on this airbus :( it's an overnight flight. My chair is missing an arm but i assume thats because it is by the emergency exit

- BA do this thing where they dim the lights and turn them back on an hour before arrival. Aer Lingus have decided to "dim" the lights by having these purple lights on, instead of turning them off.

More to come when i arrive at the airport

[t00hight0die]

unhinged filth

MINORS PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DO NOT INTERACT

fred weasley x fem!afab!reader, professor lupin x fem!afab!reader, no use of y/n

not the actual title but seems fitting given the content. i was probably high out of my mind when i wrote this so i don't remember any of my process or what in the hell led me to writing this but have a fucking blast. it is extremely bizarre.

i actually majorly regret writing this but please lmk what you think of my insane high writing

warnings (READ): cursing, filth, porn with absolutely zero plot, pissing (again, i was very high and i apologize 😭 ), very much unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it #lesschanceofpregnancyandSTIs) (realistically she'd lowkey either get prego or get a major UTI), cum play if you look a little bit close (you probably don't need to at all actually), p-in-v, masturbation, fingering, making out, public sex, getting caught, student x teacher relations, reader is lowkey a two-timer but she slays ig????, all characters are 18+, reader is called a sl.t and wh.re multiple times (during sex), teasing, slight orgasm denial, super lame, super horny, super weird

i like to think im funny but now im just wondering what the fuck is wrong with me

SMUT BELOW THE CUT - MINORS DNI

moans echoed through the empty corridor, not a soul in sight besides the noise sources.

"oh fuck, fred,” you cried out. 

you were pressed against the cold stone of the wall, at the mercy of fred's mouth as it placed heavy kisses all along your neck and jaw. his fingers gravitated from where they previously rested underneath your skirt, his thumb teasing at your sensitive clit, making their way to undo the buttons of the school uniform that was now untucked and messy.

"barely touched you and you're already moaning," fred teased, a smirk on his face. 

as soon as your shirt was unbuttoned, fred pushed it open to reveal the pale blue bra that cupped your breasts' soft skin. his lips placed soft kisses from your jaw to just above your breasts, his hands massaging them through the lace of your bra. he took this moment to pause, glancing up as you, face red and hair messy, smiled down at him. he stood up to his full height, smirking as you looked up slightly to make eye contact with him. you gingerly reached a hand up to brush his long hair from his face, using this as leverage to pull fred down into a heated kiss. 

"jump," fred murmured against your lips, his voice sending tingles down your spine.

fred's hands had moved back to your ass, using it for support as he lifted you level with his hips once you jumped, your legs wrapped around his waist. as if by instinct, fred pushed his hips into yours, grinding against your core with moans escaping both at the sensation. 

you broke the kiss, pressing your head against the wall with your eyes squeezed shut in pleasure. fred's eyes trailed across your flushed face and down, groaning at the sight of your heaving breasts. his eyes caught sight of the clasp on the front of your bra, hands automatically reaching up and unhooking it, revealing your breasts to fred. his cold fingers brushed over your nipple, releasing another moan from your swollen lips.

“please, fred, fuck me,” you begged, reaching for fred’s shoulder to support yourself.

fred grinned, unzipping his pants and pulling out his cock as he placed a sweet kiss on your lips.

“gonna make you feel so good,” fred muttered as he pushed your panties to the side and gently slid his cock in.

"shit, freddie," you panted out. 

your lips reconnected in a messy kiss as fred's cock pounded into you, the darkened corridor filled with the lewd sounds of fred sliding in and out of your dripping cunt. his thumb found your clit once more, teasing you with one hand as the other held you up with a tight grip on your ass.

"you make me feel so good, freddie," you moaned out.

"i bet you've never had anyone fuck you as good as i do, huh sweetheart?" freddie grunted, his voice strained as your cunt tightened around him.

"no- oh godric- no, nobody can fuck me like you, freddie," you whimpered, the feeling of his cock filling you and his fingers teasing your clit overwhelmed you.

"gonna cum, darling?" freddie asked, his own moans escaping him as your pussy clenched around him.

a weak hum answered his question, you were almost too fucked out to respond.

fred stopped his thrusts, causing your eyes to snap open to meet his as a whine escaped your pouted lips.

"i need a better answer from you, honey. tell me with your words."

"please, freddie, fuck me- i need to cum for you," you pleaded, your whines echoing through the corridor.

"good girl." fred murmured as he picked up his thrusts once more, feeling himself approaching his climax alongside you.

as you got closer and closer to cumming, your moans only became louder, the sweet, sweet sounds of your pleasure growing in volume with each thrust.

"careful baby, someone might hear and then neither of us will get to cum." fred warned, a small smirk crossing his face when you immediately quieted down.

it only took a few more thrusts before you were quietly moaning fred's name, burying your head in his shoulder as you hit your peak, about to fall down into your climax.

"freddie, i'm gonna cum, please- don't stop," you begged, your voice muffled by the sweater he was wearing.

"me too, baby, come on, i've got you," fred whispered, his voice faltering as your orgasm hit you in a flurry of moans, arched backs, clenching walls and fingernails digging into fred's shoulders. 

mere seconds after you came, fred's orgasm followed, his cock releasing hot cum into your pussy. the sensation had your back arching even further off of the wall.

"freddie-" you moaned out weakly, almost too fucked out to think.

"you did so good princess," fred murmured, brushing the hair out of your face and placing delicate kissing on your face and lips.

your lips locked again, only this time more gentle as you shuddered with every movement fred's cock made in your pussy, still sensitive to every movement.

the sound of someone clearing their throat had the two of you frozen in terror. both of you were in a less than ideal situation, you having your breasts completely exposed to the cool fall air as fred's cum dripped down your thighs and fred with his cock buried in your warm cunt, pants undoubtedly soaked evidence of your actions from minutes before.

you both disconnected lips, slowly turning to face the person who had caught you.

professor lupin. 

"sir-!" you began, only to be interrupted by the man.

"i'm going to give you both thirty seconds to get yourselves remotely presentable before i begin talking." remus said calmly.

he stood there as fred pulled out of your aching cunt, a blush coating your cheeks as you whimpered from the loss. the dark being his cover, remus couldn't help as his eyes trailed down to your thighs where a mixture of both of your cum and fred's slid down your gorgeous legs, his gaze moving back up to where you were frantically reclasping your bra, not before he caught a long glimpse of your pillowy breasts. 

much to his chagrin, remus could feel a hard-on growing within his pants at the sight of your disheveled and sensual appearance. 

once you and fred were both semi-decent, or as much as you could be given the situation, you both turned to Remus expecting to be yelled at.

much to your relief, it was not what happened.

"i'm not going to yell at you two, despite the fact that i definitely should, but i am going to talk to you. individually."

it was somehow decided that you would talk with the professor right after this and fred would talk with Remus tomorrow, which is what led you to where you were now, walking to remus' classroom.

"have a seat," Remus said, motioning to the desks in front of his desk.

you nodded, moving to sit in the one closest to him.

"professor?"

"yes?"

"please don't tell the headmaster. i'll do anything, i can't have this getting back to my parents." you begged, desperate to not get in trouble.

"anything?" remus asked, his voice low.

you flushed at the insinuation, but agreeing nonetheless. 

"anything." you said firmly.

"i want you to sit on the top of that desk, pull off your panties, and fuck your cum-stuffed cunt with your own fingers." remus ordered.

your lips parted, both in disbelief and in incredible arousal.

slowly, you stood up, turning so your backside faced professor lupin, and pulled down your panties, tossing them to the professor, who caught them with ease. 

he watched as the cum that was held back only by the thin fabric of your baby blue panties began to leak out of your cunt. he groaned to himself, his eyes locked on your body as you lifted yourself onto the desk, spread your legs, and thrust a finger into yourself. and then slowly added another one, and then another one.

while you gradually inserted your fingers into your leaking cunt, the sight making his pupils blown with lust, he palmed at his erection, nose buried in the scent of your cunt lingering on your panties. as time dragged on, he took his erection out of his boxers and walked over to your moaning figure. 

"good godric, you're such a naughty girl. fucking fred weasley's cum into you as you put on a show for your teacher? never knew you to be a filthy fucking slut." remus groaned out, his fist pumping at his erection.

you couldn't help the moan that escaped your lips at his lewd words, the way they turned you on beyond belief astounded you as remus merely smirked. 

"i bet you'd love it if i shot my cum all of your body, you nasty girl. hell, you're too cock-drunk to even care if someone pissed on you," remus mocked, laughing when you moaned loudly at his suggestions, "oh, so you do want someone to cum all over your pretty little body- or do you want to be pissed on like a dirty little whore."

"oh, fuck professor- please," you begged.

"please what? cum on you? piss on you? or do you want both?" 

"both- please professor, i promise i'll be good!"

"such a slut." remus muttered, a grin sneaking onto his face as he prepared himself to release all over you, your mainly discarded clothes, and the desk you were sitting on.

despite knowing it would happen, it still caught you off guard when you felt warm liquid hitting your pussy, then your stomach, then your tits, and then everywhere. it hit you that, right now, professor remus lupin was pissing all over you while watching you fuck yourself. it turned you on more than anything in the world.

he moved closer, the stream of liquid coming from his tip hitting your clit harshly as you moaned. 

"you like it when i piss all over you?" nod. "such a fucking slut. getting turned on by being pissed on. whose slut are you?"

"yours! i'm your slut, sir!" you cried out, thrusting your fingers faster as Remus jerked himself to the edge.

"sir, i'm gonna cum," you cried out, your fingers tracing circles over your clit.

"me too- oh godric, i need to be inside of you," remus muttered, moving your fingers and lining his cock up with your entrance.

"please, sir, don't tease me-" you begged the older man, your words cut short when he thrusted inside of you, pushing fred's cum deeper as he fucked you with no remorse, only caring to bring himself and you to your climaxes.

his hips stuttered as he shot his cum inside you, rubbing your clit until your eyes rolled back into your head and you came all over his cock. 

"fuck."

[lucabyte]

any thoughts about postcanon loop and mira relationship? i dont think i saw much about it in text posts but it looks like you might have something. bats eyelashes

okay i have rambled about this in a few places in mostly privately and in the tags of my own posts and self-reblogs but. grabs your shoulders. can you fucking imagine how funny loop would be as mira's beard. hear me out.

like. i'm already here for isiloops. im also already here for miraloop and mirasif qpr. im also here for miraisa qpr. im also not a coward who thinks odile should be excluded from this but thats besides the point. what im saying is that the whole things a fucking polycule and there's yet still ways this could be made way, way funnier.

So. It's obvious that Loop's theatrics are more than a bit of a facade. (They drop them when taken off-guard or in serious moments with Siffrin, and Isabeau remarks on them seeming 'shy' at the end)

But we also know that they aren't *that* much of a facade due to their speech patterns being directly reflected in act 4-5 sif's inner monologue. It's clear that Loop's regular goofy bullshit is just the manic end of Sif's emotional state unfiltered and externalised, presumably because they went fucking insane.

So while I imagine they'd probably be slightly more toned down with the party in postcanon, I don't imagine the bonus confidence that comes with Constantly Performing like that would just like... go away? Plus, new identity means you've got no expectations to be held against so... I think it would make sense for them to keep up the theatrics, the bitchiness, the change in humour from dumb puns to sharp and cruel wit.

So the idea of them proposing to Mirabelle that they could just, *pretend* to be dating isn't out of scope, to me. In a situation where she's perhaps fretting about keeping up appearences as an ever-changing housemaiden, or has heard through the grape vine that someone is going to try and make a move on her at a formal gathering, I think Loop offering to theatrically play up being her partner 'as a joke', so that they can offer her support and comfort while still under that arm's-length plausible deniability, sidestepping the emotional vulnerability of 'feelings buddies'.

(Remember, after all, that Act 6 Mirabelle's 'no spoilers' policy means she only got Act 5 Sif's fucked up little talk? There's genuine question as to how long it could take her to unpack things again after that. She probably still feels that social pressure even in a scenario where she has something again to the regular friendquest talk again, anyway...)

It lets them be 'in on a joke' together, and also gives Loop an excuse to hold hands with their friends that doesn't require they be honest about things. ("Well there's the thing, Housemaiden! I've no mouth to kiss, so we don't even have to do gross things like that to keep up appearences!") And thus gives Loop a niche in the party to slot into that otherwise probably wouldn't be filled by anyone.

And would anybody question it? The chosen saviour of the country has a weird little ethereal freak on their arm. That sounds about right for a magical saviour, and means there's really no need for any explanation for why they seemingly only showed up after The King's defeat. They're clearly Mirabelle's spirit guide, or something.

. anyway as with all things loop feel free to place this after everyone knows who they are for this to become a "relatively normal thing that can happen",

or you can place it before everyone knows who they are for the added twist-of-the-knife that is "guilt over keeping secrets" and "a really awkward and potentially upsetting recontextualisation later on"

also in case you havent seen . images related -> (x) (x)

[rainbowgod666]

Welcome to the Multiverse

Colors sendable (the first image is from @sizzlingcandyjellyfishhh while thesecond image is from @gaybichon), and also the @wynmu vibes thing. While the divider was made by @sister-lucifer (weird url ik but mines weirder soooo)

To all RPers: my very existence takes the narrative and uses it as toilet paper. The 4th wall is my onahole. You can use the askbox to talk to your blorbos.

To let you get started, here are some of my best posts. Remember that the Ourple ones are KINDA mandatory if you want ANY background on wtf is this blog.

List of my powers / Its the end of the world as you know it (and i did it on purpose) / an admin kicked me off the island lmao / Mental Health Time / You Absolute Buffoons / The Numeron Game / Well thats a thing that happened! / Out of touch: leap yeap / 🅱️usiness / Magnus did nothing wrong, except its steven universe / welcome to the internet, SCP edition / #HALLOLLAH# / AMERICA IS FASCIST HEAVEN BECAUSE FUNNY / Lost Childhoods / please save those poor gay americans / Free Disco Elysco / Bone to the bad / Priting Wrojects / the True Range of my abilities / the fuck's an apocalypse knight anyway? / @punkitt-is-here fucked Geronimo Stilton and i think its a good thing / Alex goes batshit insane and forces everyone to do as he says... again 🙄 / Screaming in a Pattern. / wizardposting: because powerscaling needed fuckign Zeno Dragonballsuper apparently / BEN 10 BUT LANCER? FUCK YEAH! / So i went batshit insane again / High Geology / fantasy settings on tumblr are really fucking cool actually / RIFLE. IS. FINE. BUT YOU FUCK UP DESIGN YOU UROD. / i technically claimed ownership of Dr. Bright and Betty from glitchtale do you seriously think im NOT gonna do that for homestuck? / XenasOuch / SCP-8000 contest, OR: WHAT THE ACTUAL FUC- / LEMMINO but like, 8 years ago / Hazbin Hotel: a necessary... something i guess. / research attempt: the wizardposting wine aunt /

Below is who i am, and also the tags you can (and should) search for

Hi, name's Alex.

Born on the first ever day of 2005 and also having aspergers, i am a guy from italy trying to make it impossible for anyone to spend a day without knowing who i am. Also i literally trascend powerscaling so hard the only things that can even put a DENT on me are... decided by me. Welcome to the multiverse i guess.

DNI: people who support genocide, people who tolerate corporate bullshit, racists, and terfs.

The following list is ALL THE TAGS USED TO NAVIGATE THIS BLOG. Seriously. This masterpost is an explaiantion for the "portal hub" i placed in the search bar

Lore Post: sometimes the lore of the multiverse, sometimes my personal life.

Welcome to the multiverse: sometimes MASSIVE textpost telling everyone "oh yeah right, this dude has autism", usually me existing. tHE MAIN TAG.

Alex's Answering Machine: literally my asks

The magical workshop: turns out the wizards of tumblr are the reason the phrase "some of y'all have gotten too comfortable saying stuff without getting punched for it" exist. And its up to my autistic, protagonism-fueled low self-esteem high self-awareness ass to... fix shit up.

Belowstory: undertale but REALLY FUCKED UP: so basically frisk falls down and is greeted by a feminine voice that calls itself chara (it becomes slightly visible after getting out of the ruins) and like the good boi undertale character he is he proceeds to save the world. This entire thing exists because one time I was like "how fucked up OP can a sans be before its My Immortal levels of wtf?" And uh yeah here we are uuuuuuh sans greets you by pointing a .44 magnum at you so thank the head of the guards (papyrus) for saving you. Everyone here is broken and just wants A Fucking Break. Also you gain levels in pacifist because LOVE is Level Of VirtuE. Fuck you lmao

Undertale.exe: so I looked at Camilla Cuevas being an awful person. Then i looked at the beautiful anime that is @jakei95's underverse... then i smushed it all toghether to basically create the perfect AU. Frisk is a pansexual fuccboi that Has Game, Chara is THICC and powerful, Betty is built like a ballerina and is 1000 years old, and Asriel is a Streemur. All of them live in this house far away from the city thats literally a larger version of sans' house. All charachters can legally drink (prepare for Drunk Chara shenanigans where its Betty Glitchtale the drunk one instead) and the only one who (probably) isnt gay is Asriel (even though frisk covets the Dreemur Dong) (one day soldier, one day...). Many chatachters from many AUs sometimes come to visit cause, you know. Its a nice place.

Curseworld: massive writing project of mine which is just "adventure time shaped mass of autism". The world is cursed and fucked over, and everything is colorful. Its also part Owl House because fuck you the magic system is FUCKED here.

Internet friends: basically internet stereotype-shaped people. We have a furry thats normal, a reddit/discord mod that just wants to work in peace, and the protagonist is Just A Guy but a-ha! He has both an xbox an...d ps5 thus fucking over any CAD reference. The last sketch i made was a mr.monopoly shaped guy who really wants youngsters to actually AFFORD shit who is married to a very obvious reference to Meru the succubus. Also i 100% intend to put a gag about mr beast living in an ATM when he isnt making videos

Im looking respectfully: look. Back then tumblr was basically Rule 34 with twitter users. Now its way better at the cost of a fraction of their value. Have fun looking at attactive women!

TOH:NEXT GENERATION: not even @moringmark's comics are safe! Enjoy the adventures of ayzee commented by me... telling everyone that shes STRONG strong. Like holy shit girl inherited will much?

Warhammer 50k: listen. This is just me looking at games workshop and fucking emperors tts and going "fuck that. Heres mine". This is a project where my "shard" assegned to this universe basically copies the imperium because, and im not joking, "the emperor is kind of a baka, but then again tzeentch is a thing so...". Also btw TTS is canon as SHIT. Like fr its all canon. Yes even the shadowsun fling, let kitten rest.

Pluripotent Impotence: an scp canon of mine thats basically "the foundation is so cold and clinical they MASSIVELY misunderstood shit". 6140, 6500, 5500 and 7000 are canon. 2718 and 5000 are in the files but they basically might as well not exist. 3812 is living tech support. 166 is in her early 20s and 239 is 19 and they fuck nasty (theyre also childhood friends. Girl Love i guess~) because fuck you clef love wins especially yuri go snort telekill dust. 2317 loves humans and thins theyre cute and squishy and when its seventh child turned out to be fucking JoyBoy? Yeah get this: he DID condemn the fortune teller that was like "dude your sevent child is one of those prophecy children that are so in vogue these days" but also messed with fate so that her death ended up being the coolest and most inspiring shit ever because he was like "considering the average Evil King story, i might as well just... let this happen! Maybe i can convince my literal offspring to spare me!" And it fucking worked. Also a bunch of shit is canon. @i-am-dado looks like a Kpop star and is somft. Dr Jack bright is my character and mine alone and also elias shaw is there i guess. My OC bangs the first one of these 2 amulet boys on a regular basis and the second one occasionally, dont ask why is there a gay polycule when im straight, there are some things that escape my mind. I have been in SCP for a long time and regardless of me making my account 6/1/2024 (LA BEFANAH) i have been here longer than you believe in. From my perspective it took a year before a 5000 contest was announced, so fcuk yoyu

Earth-ℵ₀: the best way to take care of the DC and Marvel universes is... let an autistic dude fix damages done by money-hungry idiots in hollywood. The joker is unimportant. Dr.Manhattan is Done With This Shit. I made a squad with random charachters i like. Lmao suck on uranium rods UwU

ytposting: (Funkdela Catalogue: Encounter starts playing)

Omni-shit: ben 10 is actually a good series guys, and the reboot is an interesting way of showing what would Ben 10 Classic look like if it was made Now

1% enhancement: basically i look at something and go like "hey what if the charachters were basically part me but not in a Knights of the Apocalypse way"

Tumblr italia: aò sono italiano che cos'altro vi aspettate

components: basically i use tumblr as image hosting. LoL.

Items: images turned undertale items. For reference, i have 2³¹-1 HP and my stats are ATK 100000 and DEF 65535. Yes the attack is a yugioh zexal reference. NOSTALGIA IS PTSD BUT GOOD.

Mungeon Deshi: dunmeshi is a good anime and marcille is italian

Full Nelson Analchemist: if FMA exists in my presence im going to give the 20k mg weed gummy to Truth

Evangelion 4.0: look, hideki anno has gone insane. Every time he makes evangelion as the most brain damaging version of telling someone to go touch grass people inevitably miss the point. I take it upon myself to give the @jakei95 treatment to the poor creatures (also fun fact: KAWOSHIN CANON. THEY KISS ON SCREEN. FUCK YOU AMERICA.)

The hoes are stuck: homestuck. What you thought they were safe from my grasp? 人間 you havent seen sheiße.

FeeF the BeeB: minecraft mod bullsheiße

[[Nothing Is Worth The Risk]]: lets just say that sometimes, the multiverse isnt that "cool and good"

Ultimate Sonic: i have a Sonic AU where... uhm... just. If i have a post about that. Just look at it. LoL.

Multiverse Polls: i make tHEM-

Autistic and Artistic: (draws happily)

Side effects of reading this blog can vary between true insight into the inner workings of the universe and self-defenestration from the top of the burj khalifa.

Anyways welcome to the multiverse

Do yourself a favour and dont go out without a loaded gun.

[problematicraccoon]

details about my better teenhood dr bc im losing my mind over it

(TW: MENTIONS OF SA AND STALKING and also i get real emo, my apologies)

okay so first of all, im not really reliving my teen years in their entirety- im shifting back to being 17, only a few days after my birthday.

mainly because some crazy shit happened on my 17th birthday in my cr, and it ended with me being betrayed by two of my 'best' friends during a big fight, who sided with my assailant/stalker instead of me. the day i spawn in is the day that happened. and i know that sounds stupid, like why tf would anyone wanna relive a day like that. but im gonna slightly tweak it.

in this reality, i was raised by my badass aunt Isla (fc Daphne Zuniga). she's like a big sister/aunt/best friend/mom all rolled into one, and we're extremely close, and she's very protective of me.

in my cr, no one defended me. i've taken to referring to myself as the 'attack dog friend', because i have always been the one to fight for my friends, to send paragraphs to people that hurt them or get in somebody's face for groping them, ect. but no one ever did the same for me. same goes for when my two best friends blamed me for what happened, and my other friends didnt even mention the situation. everyone kinda stopped talking to me after that.

but in my dr, i have a group of super close friends that defend me from the two that betray me. they send paragraphs to them, block them, and support me. my aunt ends up on the phone with their mom and absolutely loses it on her lmfao T0T

my reasoning for shifting back to quite possibly the worst day of my life is because i wanna fix it. i want to know what it feels like to be loved and supported instead of abandoned. this is my way of healing i suppose.

ON A LIGHTER NOTE here's some cute shit im excited for <3

-me and my best friends are gonna go to this big ball in a couple months, one that i went to with them in my cr, i just really wanna experience it again, it was so fun.

-the ball is where me and my dr crush end up confessing to each other JFAOIWEJRKANEIAJW

-MY CATS AND DUCKS AND COW :D we have three girl black cats, Arson, Murder and Mayhem. we have four ducks, Table Lamp, Carbohydrate (Carby), Heeby Jeeby, and Choi Soobin. and we have a brown cow named Annaliese that my little sister named :)

-my little siblings <3 Phoebe and Eric. they're fraternal twins, 9 years old, and born on May the 4th (the girls who get it, get it)

-Phoebe is like those creepy ass kids on horror movies. she's quiet, usually, and she always looks like she's plotting world domination. she's insanely smart and very sarcastic. she's obsessed with bugs. im a teeny bit scared of her lmfao. her face claim is Mara Wilson

-Eric is the sweetest little guy to have ever existed. he loves to sing and draw, and is very giggly and silly. he annoys the shit out of Phoebe T0T (she still loves him tho) he's very sensitive and very empathetic. he always cries when he sees a stray dog or cat and is always trying to convince us to take in strays. his face claim is Eric Lloyd.

-my aunt/mom Isla is very weird and very eccentric and very funny. she's very spiritual, like i am, and taught me how to astral project, manifest, reality shift, do tarot card readings, cartomancy, spells, stuff like that. she knows i'm a shifter, so i can tell her about my other drs and she tells me about hers. we always script each other into our drs <3 she's a giant feminist and she took me to my first protest when i was like 10. she's soft and kind but she'd 100% kill a man for me and my siblings. she's rollin with the lgbt like me, so i can be queer openly <3

-SLEEPOVERS AND 3AM SNACK RUNS WITH THE DUDES. TRAMPOLINE PARK WITH THE DUDES. ROLLERSKATING WITH THE DUDES. HIKES WITH THE DUDES. ROADTRIPS WITH THE DUDES. im gonna have a freak out i miss my friends so much.

-i scripted a tweaked version of the Leverage: Redemption plot into this dr. Breanna is a part of my friend group, and she and i are hopelessly pining after each other (until the night of the ball IFHAOIHEFH)

-dear god my clothes T0T i cannot wait to play dress up fr

-all the women in my family have psychic/empathic abilities that develop around the age of 10. we also have occasional prophetic dreams/visions.

-i never got to meet my maternal grandmother Joyce in my cr, as she died a long time before i was born, but i scripted she's still alive in my dr and we're very close. im finally gonna get to meet her T0T i cant wait to hug the shit out of her. she was so amazing yall i cant wait to get to know her.

-i have one of those pink american flags with Chaewon from Lesserafim on it lmfao. i love being a patriot <3

[aardvaark]

I watched Leverage growing up and when I eventually discovered the fandom online/on tumblr I was genuinely shocked to see everyone hated The White Rabbit Job when it had been one of my favorite episodes as a teenager. I understand it's fucked up (part of why I liked it) and a little or really a lot campy/unrealistic (part of why I liked it) but I always like (as an exception to the norm ofc, it works best when it's rare) when the mark is sympathetic, and I liked the weird dream state stuff, and what the story brings out in Sophie and Parker's characters/narratives (and Nate, too, and his arrogance/brilliance/faith in the team). I don't think it's necessarily still one of my favorite episodes but I still enjoy it, although I understand better why some people don't like it. It's just funny to me every time I think about it because I always remember my initial reaction of "what do you MEAN people dont like the white rabbit job????" < totally mystified teenager me

huh, i had no idea it was so unpopular! definitely not one of my favourites, and i can see why it might not be well-liked, but i didn’t know how much people disliked it. i’m pretty new to interacting with the fandom here. im guessing the problems are how much they mess with a guy who’s fairly decent iirc and how the idea of that kind of psychological manipulation happening to you would be pretty terrifying. i can understand that. sometimes surreal things are kinda triggering for various reasons - paranoia, delusions, OCD, etc. and no it’s probably not the most realistic of their cons haha!

though mainly i liked the parker moments anyway, not so much the con. there’s:

one of the last major moments in the sophie & parker relationship arc, with sophie saying she trusts parker to talk to the mark alone.

parker proving that sophie was right to trust her, too, because she talks the mark down by herself, and she does it *as parker*, not as a grift and not trying to emulate sophie. she does it in her slightly awkward, very parkerish, completely valid way - she’s earnest and brave, and it’s not what sophie would have said (sophie would probably be very sweet and soothing) but she doesn’t have to talk to people like sophie. parker’s own way of connecting works, possibly better than sophie’s method would have!

parker opening up a little about her brother. and talking about her Feelings to a stranger!!showing a bit of vulnerability and sharing!!

parker coming back at the end and asking if they’re all good, sophie asking her if they’re all good, and parker saying they are.

THE line "they thought i was crazy, but i never was! i never was" which is SO important. parker’s always taken it on the chin when people say she’s crazy, insane, that there’s something wrong with her (and not in the now-affectionate eliot way). people have told her that for a long time. maybe she’s even believed it. but now she insists that not only is she not crazy now (ie after some time with her new family who’ve helped her heal), but that she was never crazy - not when she was a traumatized and grieving autistic kid, not when she was a scared and closed off teen or young adult, not when she does or says things that people call "weird". and she says it like a realization and she sounds so determined and insistent and aaahh!!! it’s just so important!!!!!

anyway yeah. i guess i don’t know about the episode overall, but i enjoyed the parker moments. she’s my favourite, im not even gonna pretend lol. i really like the sophie & parker relationship beats in this one and that it shows how incredibly far parker has come - without changing who she is at her core. that’s how i viewed it, at least! totally willing to hear other opinions tho :)

[bathroomtrapped]

ohmygod i literally just made an account on letterboxd bc i watched saw (2004) and loved it so much and ur interview was so inspiring to me and ive been on an absolute craze trying to reblog like every single saw post on tumblr and i somehow found your account what the heck?!!?!?! ur art is AMAZING and i absolutely love ur takes on saw as a franchise and its significance to the queer community. i hope to be as knowledgeable of this franchise as you are one day despite me only being a baby saw fan!!

i had a quick question; i found on the saw heritage post blog that they thought leigh/james/someone else confirmed that saw (2004) did not actually occur the day before 9/11 despite the phone given to them being set to that date. however, when i asked them if they knew where this source was from (bc im so curious!!! i want to know everything!!!!!!) but neither they nor i could find the actual source for that so i was wondering if maybe u knew??? just curious :3

regardless ty for taking the time to read this and dedicating so much time to this fandom!! i love that horror fans like you exist in a fandom that i previously thought would be weird and slightly disturbed film bros (i had a lot of incorrect preconceived notions about saw that have been quickly resolved i promise)

thank you!! im glad that people feel the same way about it as i do but even if people thought i was some crazy transexual making everyone else woke and pronouns, i wouldnt care. the story, especially lawrences but adams as well, really resonates with me as a trans person for so so many reasons, more than i listed in the interview. to me, i cant read his character without filling in the gaps with trans subtext. it not only explains but also enriches the personal experiences of these characters as well as their dynamics with each other. theyre both characters that are defined primarily by how theyre seen by other people, themselves, and eventually each other. the narrative is soooo focused on perception and masks and who u truly are, i find it hard to separate any kind of queer theory from that.

as for the 9/11 question thats such a dumbass pet peeve of mine. its one of the things that makes me shout UMMMM ACTUALLY at the top of my lungs. my blood pressure sours to inhuman levels when someone confidently says the movie takes place not just in 2001 but the day before 9/11. not because of some interview or confirmation from any of the crew because my knowledge of old fandom history is incredibly spotty. old sites and interviews r a mystery to me for the most part BUT! the reason it is for sure not before 9/11 is because during the flashback of pauls trap (during lawrences monologue about jigsaw) kerry tapp and sing are all at the scene with other officers and i believe its kerry who holds up an evidence bag thats labeled 2004. the scene takes place 5 months before the events of saw 1 so its not possible that it takes place 3 years before that. it just seemed like a funny (but insanely bold considering how 9/11 was only 3 years before) joke and easter egg for people to catch on to, not actual lore meant to be taken seriously.

if u want to look for the interview, i would honestly just listen to the commentary tracks bc it mightve been said there. i know in the one with leigh, james, and cary they discuss plot holes fans complained about, questions fans had online, the fanfic they read (briefly LOL). ive only seen that one (and once) but theres at least 2 other commentary tracks with different people that i havent gotten around to for fear of like. completing saw? idk i cant bring myself to watch all of the commentary tracks but theres a chance they discuss it there! i can only speculate on the reason, all i know is that saw 2004 takes place in 2004 based on actual evidence from the media itself

if u have any other questions let me know. i still have the original draft of the interview which had more questions and longer responses bc i couldve gone on for days abt the lore and saw queer theory and ill never shut up about it

[aromanticannibal]

shinsou gets adopted by aizawa for the reason of your choice and now leaves with a fucking cryptid. this also kinda turned into siblings aizawa and shinsou. here's headcanons

aizawa sleeps, he does. it's just that shinsou has no fucking idea when that happens. he sees him sleep at school, sure, but he never sees him sleep in his actual bed or even on the couch.

I hc aizawa as autistic because did you look at this man so here are a couple autistic things he does :

he stims by meowing, purring (it's more of a weird rumbling he does in the back of his throat that can be slightly scary if it's the first time you see him do it), he makes BISCUITS and shinsou loves to joke about it and aizawa loves the jokes. he also plays with his hair a lot and bites his nails when he's stressed.

he actually masks a lot outside of his house, which is says actually makes him a really cool stealthy man but he's really just masking, which means he often gets the "you're autistic?? but you look so normal?" comment.

his special interests are cats and Yamada's radio show. he has three cats (salt, pepper and sugar) and never misses Put Your Hands Up radio. (when the special interest appeared around when he was 25, like 3 years after mic's show started, he panicked and thought Yamada would find it weird, but the dude obv was so fucking excited because his friend likes his show omg omg)

aizawa has learned a lot of social rules from necessity, because he's an underground hero and a teacher, but that doesn't mean he understands them. he also will not know ever if someone is trying to flirt with him or if someone is mad at him, however he will notice if someone's sad. he doesn't understand it either

back on track. aizawa likes to sing along to whatever music is playing, no matter what kind it is. man will sing along to fucking WAP and peace and love on planet earth in the same breath.

shinsou sings along too sometimes, but it's rare because he doesn't like singing in front of other people.

shinsou and aizawa can communicate telepathically. that's what other people think at least because there's no fucking way they're not.

they're honestly more like weird siblings than parent and child - they tried doing that, they really did, but it was too awkward.

shinsou is, neurodivergency wise, aizawa's opposite. it's almost funny how specific this is. aizawa is always sleepy. shinsou is never fucking capable of sleeping and always hyperactive, no matter how blank faced he looks (im just pushing my adhd shinsou agenda now). aizawa struggles to see how others feel (again apart from sad people) and shinsou is a fucking. empath or some shit. when aizawa wants to annoy shinsou he tells him he's an empath and when shinsou wants to annoy aizawa he tells him he's an empath this is what compatibility is. shinsou needs to be close to people, he loves touching and hugs, aizawa prefers being alone and will refuse any kind of physical contact unless it's to punch him, a kid he's helping needing comfort, or one of his students needing comfort. shinsou is ofc an exception as well and he will hug him if shinsou's noticeably in a bad mood.

it's hilarious how similar they look but how different they actually are.

in good kinda siblings fashion, they insult each other all the time, aizawa calling shinsou variations of trash raccoon child and asshole, and shinsou calling him old man or boomer if he really wants to make him tick. or asshole too.

they wouldnt die for each other but they very much would kill for each other

aizawa would punch a bitch for shinsou. he would also punch shinsou if needed /j

literally no one at school knows what their relationship is. what's wrong with them.

todoroki insists they're related and shinsou calls aizawa dad in class at some point just to see him lose his mind. he then vehemently denies it happens, which wouldn't work if aizawa was also acting like it didn't happen. todoroki is going insane.

remember how I said one of aizawa's special interests is Put Your Hands Up radio? by continuously infodumping on shinsou, he makes him hyperfixate on it too. shinsou hates him so much for it /lh

that's all I wanna write a fic about this but man. am I lazy