#it makes me so sad tho bc if he rlly wanted to he could have me. and i have such a big heart w sm love to give to someone :((((

[skunkg1rll]

.

[conanssummerchild]

im bored as shit so im going to asign a community person/ship to every conan gray song bcs i really just use this site as a stream of my conciousness, if anyone has a better one for any of them feel free to tell me, also fair warning abed is my fav character, i'll try not to make everything abt him and troy but no promises

grow: the whole final episode really but im thinking mostly jeff tbh or also abed leaving for LA, or even maybe troy leaving on his voyage ☹️

idle town: the 'town' being greendale i feel like this applies to jeff also 😭 like its abt all of them but its jeffs pov

generation why: im thinking my girl britta hehe idk how to explain it but the vibes are so there

crush culture: im thinking annie, but also maybe jeff, aro king 👑

greek god: im thinking maybe abed in high school? i would say annie but she seemed to care more about fitting in while abed had accepted he couldnt, also hes like insightful and observant yk

lookalike: oh my god, brittas pov and its about jeff and slater oof

the other side: troy and abed, specifically in geothermal escapism 😭</3 im killing myself why would i do this

the king: okay fuck this is so trobed coded, abeds pov

comfort crowd: the whole study group tbh <33 in more specifics i was thinking jeff + the study group and honestly abed and annie

wish you were sober: i mean this one has to be either jeff and britta or britta and troy, though troy and britta could be taken either as britta wanting to go party and smoke weed or wtv and troy not rlly doing that stuff or britta feeling rejected bcs of troy giving all his attention to abed 😭 (like as in wish u were sober being wish u werent a raging homosexual)

maniac: probably i'd have to say jeffbritta from either pov

(online love): i... dont know tbh. the vibes are giving annie and troy for some reason, maybe once troys already left?

checkmate: the fond eyeroll i had to give, jeff and britta again. maybe annie being pissed at jeff over their kiss but i dont ship them romantically

the cut that always bleeds: idk, maybe jeff and annies weird ass relationship that keeps fucking happening is the closest, from annies pov

fight or flight: idk tbh, maybe trobed and britta if i had to go with smth, this one is mostly EXTREMELY byler coded (from stranger things) and im never fucking letting that go

affluenza: ok i mean ive gotta give this one to jeff dont i

(can we be friends?): troy abed and annie <3 im so soft for them

heather: ok fuck i HAVE to say trobed and britta and its abeds pov and if we're being specific them in virtual systems analysis becuase i'll never get over this episode ("ive run the simulations, i dont get married :/") bcs i fucking love abed being jealous of britta while she was with troy in the cool way but also in the sad if troy cant love me no one will way

little league: this is troy and abed when troy leaves :(((( and this is canon bcs my beloved wife and i are so troy and abed coded and she loves little league sooo

the story: ok so the boy and the girl are hmm annie and abed, the boy and the boy are troy and abed duh doy, him and his friend are maybe idk britta and troy, i dont wanna say jeff or abed bcs their dad/mum abandoned them and that bit's abt wanting to get away from ur parents yk

fake: (😭) maybe jeff (alan's pov 😔😔💔💔) nah but fr i see people joking abt his song but its lowkey fire

overdrive: WHY DO THEY ALL MAKE ME THINK OF JEFF AND BRITTA

telepath: jeff 😔 and 😔 britta 😔

movies: ok i literally cant say anyone other than abed, the king of movies. im not really feeling troy tho, maybe rachel, like maybe when abed kept trying to super speed run their relationship and he was anxious abt not passing the relationship tests

people watching: the MOST annie coded song ever holy fuck she is so people watching coded i love her so much

disaster: abed. or britta. my abandonment/commitment issues babies <33

best friend: TROBED. THE ONLY BEST FRIENDS EVER

astronomy: would it be absolutely too painful if i said troy and abed. honestly i actually think im feeling more jeff and abed but not like at eachother just both of them together in their sadness, from their pov to someone else (britta and troy probably seeing as these r their main romantic interests)

yours: AHH THIS SONG DEAR GOD </3 can i say abed jesus fuck im killing myself this one for abed hurts so much, not really directed at anyone in specific, or more like just directed at everyone, just his abandonment issues :( ("i dont always see it coming" PUT ME DOWN)

jigsaw: oo britta, my queen she just wants to be loved so bad </3 but also a bit abed ("if being less insane would make you stay" oof)

family line: okay. jeff.he actually invented having daddy issues

summer child: ok its abed bcs i kin him idc, im conans summer child™ and i said so /lh

footnote: not quite sure, very annie coded imo. maybe trobed? either pov ig but im feeling troy

memories: hm, trobed after troy leaves? abed trying to get over him but he keeps imagining troys still there with him like as in one of the hallucinations he has bcs i read a fic like this yesterday and it was sooooo good, idk maybe this is a little far fetched

the exit: im not rlly sure actually, either jeffbritta after the whole i love you in front of anyone fiasco or trobed when troys dating britta 🤷‍♂️

never ending song: ok, jeffbritta.

winner: THE MOST SONG EVER. ok this one is abed. it will always be abed. family line i feel like is more about a hostile home enviroment and jeff implies that his was, while winner is more pain of neglect or disconnect so i feel like its more appliable to abed because of how hes shown to not be understood by his parents and feels responsible for his mother leaving and this makes me think of the line "you dont really wanna hear the truth, do you?" because like his mum loving him on paper but not actually loving who he is or be willing to accept hes different and has different needs FUCK abeds mother all my homies hate abeds mother (what im not projecting at all my parents definitely love me and accept that im autistic /s)

killing me: im not quite sure actually. conan did write this song about someone who gave him tonsilitis and abed cannonically had tonsilitis though so 🤯

lonely dancers: hmm i feel like this song is upbeat enough to be trobed being silly tgth but maybe its more jeffbritta coded, or jeff and abed abt britta and troy, or vice versa, not sure

sorry i never mentioned shirley i do love her

feel free to take any of these as platonic or romantic idrk, a lot of them i couldve meant either way anyway

if u even made it this far u can have a gold star ⭐️ there u go

[sockiestupidity]

Reader having a depressive episode and Miguel helps them out of it 👀👀👀👀

Also can I be 🕸️ anon 👁️👄👁️

AH OKAY SO FIRST IF ALL. RLLY SRRY IF THIS IS BAD😭 I LEGIT DIDNT KNOW HOW TO WRITE THIS🧍‍♂️

ALSO MY SECOND REQUEST???😭 FREAKING TF OUT LITERALLY TY 🕸️ ANON

I JUST WANNA STATE THAT I HAVE NEVER HAD A DEPRESSIVE EPISODE EVEN THO IM CONSTANTLY SAD SO A LOT OF THINGS MIGHT BE INACCURATE BUT JUST LET ME KNOW IF THIS IS LIKE WRITTEN RLLY BADLY AND ILL TAKE IT DOWN🥴

Warnings-lowercase intended, bad writing and grammar as usual, depression/depressive episode, ooc miguel?, use of the word mijo, forehead kiss👁️

nonverbal/mute reader again (might decide to make this my thing?? bc nonverbal/mute reader fics do be hard to find)(srry if u wanted reader to talk 😬😬😬)

reader uses hq housing as usual🤩(U CANNOT TELL ME THAT HQ HOUSING DOES NOT EXIST I REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT😤)

ALSO MIGUEL AND READER ARE AGAIN IMPLIED TO ALREADY HAVE AN ESTABLISHED PLATONIC/FOUND FAMILY DYNAMIC (sorry for the long intro 🕸️ anon, pls still lob me🥺)(that second part is meant to be funny lol)

it was around 1:00 pm the time you and miguel decided to set up as a designated lunch time as the both of you had not been able to get together because both of your schedules had been busy lately. although you had claimed to have been occupied with missions, he hadn't seen you completing any of those missions. he shrugged it off, thinking that maybe he just was preoccupied with another matter when you had completed your missions. (A/N: miguel i lob u but sometimes ur rlly serving idiot😔)

his oblivious mindset soon turned into worry when it dawned 1:30 and you still had not shown up. "what trouble could that kid possibly have gotten into that made them this late?" he thought to himself. you were usually a punctual person, and often arrived to your lunch meetings with him earlier than he did. as he waited another ten minutes he decided that he needed to take action, it was out of character for you to be this late, especially with your history of punctuality.

miguel headed over to your room at hq housing. in his mind, he thought that it was a possibility that you were just tired and had just layed down for a nap, forgetting about your meet up with him.

as he knocked on your door and patiently waited, he noticed that there was a lack of noise. he knocked on your door, and proceeded to hold his ear up to the door, wanting to confirm the lack of noise. you had naturally always been a quiet person, contrasting with many of the eccentric personalities most spider people had.

miguel felt something odd about the quietness, and decided that he had no choice but to investigate further. surprisingly, the door was locked, despite the fact that you had always locked your door, no matter what. as he entered the room he was met with an unsightly mess.

all of your belongings were strewn across the floor, if he wasnt worried before then he was definitely worried now. your stuffed animals had always been your most prized possessions, he remembered how you always furiously typed about them. hell, he wouldnt be surprised if your stack of communication cards were so thick because you made a special card for each stuffed animal.

as he entered where your bed was located, he noticed an increasing amount of clothing piles, as well as more misplaced stuffed animals, he frowned at this. where could you possibly be? and how could you let your room get this bad? he trudged through the piles of clothes. he looked at your bed, there was nothing there but a lump. he assumed that it was more of your clothes, or maybe your pillows. he was about to back away when he suddenly saw the lump move.

"kid is that you moving right now?" he asked, waiting for a sign of some sort that it was infact you, and not just his imagination. he suddenly heard a tap.

miguel took that as a sign that it was you, "can you please show me that wonderful face of yours?" he asked softly. he wanted to make sure that he wasnt accidentally pressuring you to do anything.

when there was a lack of response he decided to go a slightly different route, "may i flip the sheet over just a bit for you? i want to talk to you face to face." he wasn't really expecting a response, as it seemed like you didn't want to acknowledge him. he was taken aback when you responded with another tap.

he slowly lifted the covers, and was met with your face, but something was off..

you had a dead look in your eyes, they also looked red, as if you had been crying. he gave you a concerned look. if he had known that you were struggling this much he would've visited you sooner.

he ran his fingers through your hair as a form of comfort, attempting to give you some sort of comfort. "im going to try to get you out of this mess, you wont have to worry about being alone anymore, alright?" he watched you as you slowly nodded.

miguel started to get to work on your room. he made sure that all your clean and dirty clothes had been separated accordingly, and had folded all the clean clothes neatly into your drawers, which he had also taken the liberty to organize, he then placed all your stuffed animals in the correct spots that were assigned to each of them, collected your trash, and finally ended with a good scrub. he decided to not only clean your whole bathroom, but also scrubbed down any other hard surfaces that had been covered in grime. (A/n: this might be a bit extreme for just a week but trust me, it doesn't take that long for hard surfaces to get musty)

once every item in your room had been neatly organized and accordingly cleaned he approached you once again. you still had yet to move from your position.

he sat down on your newly cleaned floor, wanting to make sure that he looked less threatening to you, he then spoke up once again, " everything will be fine kid. do you think you could get up?" you slowly nodded.

he helped you slowly stand up and embraced you in a hug. you were caught by surprise, as the only time miguel came in contact with people, it was mostly violent.

after the hug ended he spoke up again, "you're going to take a shower and get dressed, ill wait for you." you slowly nodded once again.

you still felt so much dread, and misery but you wanted to show miguel that you could be strong and that you really did want to get better for him.

you headed to the shower, clothes and towel in hand. you slowly took your clothes off after the water was to your liking and slowly began your shower. you mostly just focused on rinsing your body, the thought of doing your hair seemed as too big of a task for yourself. you finished your shower and dried yourself off, then got dressed.

you then opened the bathroom door, your face meeting miguel's as you gestured to your hair, "you want me to take care of your hair?" you nodded in response to the question.

he knew exactly how to take care of your hair, as he used to take care of gabriellas hair.. he started running the sink, and then grabbed your hair products and a hairbrush. he ran his fingers under the water, "alright, this is going to be weird but i need you to tilt your head, just like you're at the hair salon, it might feel uncomfortable because we don't have a stool but i promise you that you'll feel so much better later." you nodded and placed your head in the sink.

"let me know if it gets too hot." you blinked your eyes in response. he started massaging in your shampoo, after rinsing it out he lightly brushed your hair for a bit, before continuing with conditioner. once he was done with conditioner it was easier for him to brush out your knot's.

once all the knots were properly detangled he turned the sink off and spoke once again, "would you like your hair dried?" you nodded, he grabbed your drier and got to work, making sure every part of your hair dried evenly (if you have curly hair he used the diffuser attachment). after your hair was dried he brushed out your hair once again.

you turned to face him with a soft look in yours eyes. you reminded him of gabby so much that it hurt his heart. he couldn't even imagine his little girl having to go through this by herself. "thank you" you signed.

he felt a pang in his heart, "of course, you know that im always here if you need my help, mijo." he gave you a small forehead kiss.

"we should get some food now, kid." you nodded. he guided you towards the cafeteria that most spider people ate at in the society. you smiled at the miguel themed burger. maybe everything would finally be okay with miguels to support you through your toughest times.

A/N: this might be long and confusing bc im rlly sleep deprived(sorry😔)

ofc theres more to depression but i rlly wanted to at least incorporate some sort of fluff😭

[b0nes-mcgee]

It’s time for music headcanons with the batfam, bc if I don’t get this out of my head and onto page, I’m going to implode.

Fave first, Dick is definitely a indie pop/indie rock kinda boy. Not just because I identify with that, but also bc he gives me those overly energetic, bubbly vibes, that I feel like only come from Grouplove, Vampire Weekend, and Adam Melchor. I also feel like he’s a Mitski and Boygenius kinda bitch, bc ough, boY, he has angst. Said angst can only be expressed through sad girl music, bc he will die before he ever expresses his feelings about anything to anyone.

NEXT we have Jason, I think he’s an emo ass boy, ngl, but specifically like folk punk. He listened to twin sized mattress one time, broke down crying, and hasn’t looked back. Also things like The Mountain Goats, PUP, or Modern Baseball. Ugh, I could make a whole ass playlist for this boy. If he’s with other ppl, I think he’d play something more mainstream of the emo genres, like Arctic Monkeys or The Strokes.

DAMIAN, I THINK, IS COMPLICATED. So, for one thing, he grew up in a weirdo environment, where they probably never listened to music, and if they did, it was “”tasteful”” music, for rich ppl. That, or it was culturally significant. So, I think I’m his exposure to music after moving in with Bruce, he started just absorbing absolutely all the music he could. Like, he’s an everything enjoyer. His spotify liked songs are a minefield, bc one second it’ll be playing Chet Baker, next it’s Viagra Boys, then some country shit, then Chopin, and then it’s Lil Nas X.

BABS, I think, would be a folk music/sad girl music enthusiast. She really likes Ryan Adams, Phoebe Bridgers, Hoizer, Mitski, etc. It’s something that she and Dick bonded over when they first started dating. I think with her, she appreciates the calm/slightly sad music bc she lives in a rlly crazy world, and she just wants to meditate a little when she’s sitting at that desk all day, trying to keep her family and friends alive.

Timmyyyyyy is a Kpop enjoyer. Sorry, I don’t make the rules. Specifically, he probably likes SEVENTEEN or ATEEZ a lot. He actively tries, every day of his life, to not stan any of the members, but it’s rlly hard when he’s had two hours of sleep in the past week, and Yoon was just really cute in that last interview. I also think he’s really into trap and pop. He knows all the lyrics to every recent song on the top 100 list.

Duke, I think is really into R&B. I think he’s amenable to pop/rock/rap, etc., but he really just wants something to belt out. Common occurrences are finding him in the kitchen, making an omelette, singing Amy Winehouse at the top of his lungs. If u catch him doing it tho, he gets rlly shy. His guilty pleasure is theatre music. He has to bribe his family to go see Little Shop of Horrors with him.

Stephanie has a 2000s-2010s pop addiction. Anything that makes her feel like Hannah Montana is her SHIT. She’s out here blasting Bubblegum Bitch and early Taylor Swift. You also can and will find her crying to sad One Direction songs. When she’s moody, she will unironically play My Chemical Romance. She understands pop punk a lil bit, but the lyrics tend to get male-manipulator-y, so she sticks with the bands she already knows.

Alfred likes 50s/60s jazz/pop. Frank Sinatra, Chet Baker, etc. It reminds him of home, and of his family. He also really likes old French music, like Joe Dassin. I’m ngl, I don’t know old music enough to add more to this one, but u get the idea 😭

BRUCE. Ugh. He’s definitely the kind of dad who never moved past the music of his childhood. He firmly believes that the Beatles is the best band of all time, and no one can convince him otherwise. I think he tends to gravitate towards the rock/goth end of 70s/80s music, so things like the Cure, New Order, maybe a lil bit of Siouxsie and the Banshees. His goth phase was INTENSE, Alfred can attest to this.

Edit: HOLY SHIT I CANT BELIEVE I FORGOT CASS 😭😭😭

Ok, Cass is defo a similar situation to Damian, grew up with literally silence, so music is a super new thing to her. But I think she really enjoys all kinds of genres. I think that especially instrumentals get her, bc it’s just noises that she can focus on, no lyrics to distract her from the sound. I think she also likes to “sing” along to said instrumentals, but mostly it’s just making noises to the same beat and sound, but it’s very off-key.

[why-are-all-the-users-taken]

hoo but their peculiars

IRBDNSN NOT ME COMBINING TWO OF MY FAVORITE FANDOMS

Basically what this is is if the characters in heroes of Olympus were in miss peregrine's home for peculiar children mk

Ok headcanons time bc it's 10pm smth and I wanna stay up late tonight

Percy Jackson

Ok so his peculiarity would obviously be controling any kind of liquid no surprise there

But like,,, do u know how helpful that would have been beginning of Hollow City??? Like??? They probably wouldn't have tipped over or at least percy could get and dry their stuff!!

Alright so backstory for him

He lived with his mom (sally) and step dad (Gabe) . His biological father left when he was rlly young and then his mom married his step dad.

So anyways percy learns abt his abilities rlly early on and Gabe thinks he's a demon or smth idk

Ofc sally doesn't, she loves her percy, but yk Gabe is Gabe and so she's forced to give him away.

And she ends up giving percy (who's like 9-11 at the time) to this lady who stopped by where they live one day and who said she takes care of kids like percy

So Sally obviously not wanting her son to get abused more by gabe allows her to take percy (spoilers, she never sees him again ;-;)

But anyways, percy is like one of the first children miss peregrine found so he had time to grow up some before they had to make the loop

On to how he gets along with the others

Olive and Claire love just abt everyone so ofc they love him like a brother as well <3

Bronwyn is vERY protective of him bc she, victor percy and Emma were the first ones that miss peregrine found (idk who she found first it just seems like they're a lil closer to miss P than some of the others)

Enoch and him don't rlly talk to much but they're nice to each other when they do talk

Emma and Percy are actually rlly good friends!! (Theyre part of the gossip gang)

Fiona and percy are pretty good friends actually!! Bc plants need water and percy controls water yk

him aand Abe were friends

He was suspicious of Jacob at first but for used to him and they're pretty good friends

Hugh and percy are both so chaotic I'd be surprised if they weren't friends lmao

But anyways percy probably had a crush on Victor at some point (he's still rlly sad victor died)

Yes that one was based off the fact that percy def had a crush on Charlie

Perch is still bisexual 100%

Ok that's all for percy that I can think of

im just gonna do percy for now bc I can't think for more for the others and this is already hella long

Edit: wait shit this already has 20 likes um- so I'm prolly gonna do the others then- I had fun with this tho so I don't mind :D

[stgosupremacy]

MY SATOGOU GOODBYE RANT.

so yeah i said i would do one so here i am. honestly dont know how long this will be so let's get stuck in lmao <33

I'm starting after the 'im glad i met you part', bc i kind of already did a post on that anyway lol (and just wanted to add, in the dub they changed it to 'I'm sure glad i met you,' and Ash says it so soft omg i literally died on the spot watching it ;-;

(headsup ignore the fact some of the images are off a youtube channel i couldn't find the scenes💀)

so i hope this is all in order, but this bit is so so SO sweet when Goh tells him 'thanks for reaching out for me' like no surprise i was literally crying at that point like sgdxkjnfsgf it's so sweet to me that without Ash none of his journey would have really happened, but tbf you could say the same for all of his companion tbh. either way, i am very glad goh met satoshi too omg <3 🥺

theennnnnn this part is Ash just offering some sweet words of advice and comfort, talking ab their dreams ect, like, nothing too bittersweet to see here, but i guess you can say the way he said 'WE' and meant both of them is sweet lmao

OK so on the palm of our hands thing i have a few things to say

first of all i love how Ash knew that he knew what to continue with bc they are just so in sync with each other ofc <3 and OFC they had to put that scene in for the last episode, like when it was in the Mewto episode for the first time, i was honestly screaming of how cute it was LIKE THE FACT ASH MADE THE LITTLE ADD ON OF 'OUR HANDS' IN THE FIRST TIME THEY DID IT JUST MAKES IT EVEN MORE CUTER EJHSKF

but anyways as much as i love this scene because of how 'the future is in the palm of our hands', can be interpreted in some otherways, 👀 I also couldnt help but thing about something else.

after/before the Project mew stuff actually started/finished (pretty sure it was after,) we see a scene of Goh, Gary and Horace using the 'palm of our hands' phrase together, and yeah its rlly cute lmao, but i was kind of hoping it was something unique for Ash and Goh, not trying to be a fusspot, but i think the scene now feels slightly less special to me now Goh used it with some other people?

I mean sure, ash and goh were still the first people who did it, and it IS their kind of thing lmao, like they created it. Even tho it was just an initial thought, it is still really sweet that goh used it with others don't get me wrong <3

when i was watching this i was like no way this is it lol like are you not gonna confess

jokes but thankfully they made a bittttt more to it (and good bc if they left it there I would be sitting there like what)

so they start to walk away from each other and you see Goh is still quite sad while Ash is still holding up, my heart was dying </3

STOP IT WHEN GOH STOPPED AND HE WAS ABOUT TO CRY AAAAAAAAAA 🥺🥺🥺

BUT OFC

OFC ASH HAS TO CALL OUT TO HIM AND THE WAY GOH'S EYES HAVE THE LITTLE SPARKLE WHEN HE HEARS HIS VOICE 💖 The fact Ash actually thought while he was walking away 'oh shit need to check up on the bf' lol and climbed up the little hill to wave him off again is the cutest thing; CANNOT CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE this made their whole goodbye for me tbh 💕💕💕

SUPPORTIVE BROS FOR REAL <3

ofc they want each other to achieve their dreams aww

ok but THIS

the bit where they nod at each other is so comforting to me like it's weird, but it gave me a little more satisfaction i'll say, lmao. also gives you a hint that they are wrapping up the goodbyes fully so it gave me some very brief preparation time 😢

and with that, Goh runs off into the distance.

</3 (my boy has grown up sm) 🥺

OK i do love that when he runs off, he's more confident, and when it switches back to Ash, it has him watching over Goh until he can't see him anymore, which is rlly cute <333 ahhh they're so pure man

Ash runs off to his new journey too, and he begins to talk about Pallet Town to Pikachu...

Thats it

yeah

SOOOOO BASICALLY THIS IS MORE OF THE RANT SECTION:

uhmmm so first things first. Did i like the goodbye for them? Well, yeah, it was quite cute, especially the end part where Ash gives him that last bit of encouragement and called out his name, because SHEESH if they left that part out and gave them that first goodbye without Ash calling out to him, and they just left each other....yeah, i wouldn't be happy.

see, i just kind of thought they deserved a bit better. It was v cute and all, but like they've been through so much together 😭 😭 😭 😭 like I'm saying this as a shipper but still 😂 tbf if they hugged I probably would have cried but let's be honest I could cry at anything at this point

but hey what we got was pretty cute, I just would have tweaked some things because honesty this duo are literally the closest I've ever seen in the anime, and I would have hoped for a little bit more, BUT IT'S FINE IT HAPPENED *mentally counts*

9 MONTHS AGO (??? where has the time gone)

but thank you for coming to my TED talk <33

[ghost-in-your-doorway]

Done w therapy

I talked about the financial abuse with my mom bc i was giving context to why therapy had been traumatic for me(therapist getting overwhelmed n giving up on me bc i was taking too long to unlink my bank account from mom among other things)

I told her about the timeline i wrote last night n about how it was all so so much that i could only do what id always known up until i was about 7, and how it stopped bc i remembered moms dont-talk rules

I told her about the discomfort down there i always had and how much pain i was in n how i thought that was normal n my fault and how i rlly wanted to hurt myself so i could stop hurting (an impulse i still have)

I told her about how my family gave up potty training me so they sat me on a rug like an untrained dog. I struggled with urine retention my whole life and it was too hard for them and mom didnt want anything to do with me so it was left to my dad and brothers and it made me tooo scared

I told her about how i was in the hospital for a uti bc of the exam, n how mom refused to see me bc she was angry with dad. And the nurses wouldnt let him come to my bed, but he was allowed to stay in the room until nighttimes. She said he was probably really good at putting on a good face and charming his way thru and convincing them to let him be around me at all. I thought wait i didnt tell you about pastor face tho

She said that it all made too much sense n my stuff is kind of a classic case unfortunately. It all makes so much sense n thats so horrific n sad

I dont remember what i said. I feel like i rambled over her n talked too much. She said stuff about how a lot of her own abuse went unnoticed bc she didnt have words for it, she didnt know much. N i said yeah i thought u get pregnant from kisses bc that was the one thing that didnt happen to me.

A lot of what we talked about was how this stuff just made lots of sense, and looking at my abuse history thru a lens of it was all related to sexual abuse the whole time actually made sooo much sense. I talked about how moms rules about sexual abuse were that it isnt sexual abuse until penetration

Idk

I feel rlly bad for telling. She said she had to go for her next appointment n i feel bad for taking the time. I feel bad she had to hear it. Im so so scared that im gonna overwhelm her, but R says that shes doing this job bc she wants to help people like me

I dont want to be left im scared

[gayforrenee]

My ratings on how emotional some of my favorite EAH duos would make me if they played marbles (the thing from Squid Game!!!) (also I just kind of want to give everyone my take on how I think it would all happen and who would die)

Before I go any further, mb for just dipping on y'all. I just left the EAH fandom and then got back into it. And I actually HAVE started writing All I Want again (weird that it was so sudden but whatever)

This is from the least emotional (still cry-worthy fs tho) to the most emotional (literally screaming and sobbing). 1 and 2 are actually tied because I couldn't decide which was worse. I struggled rlly bad on some of these so just because I put one higher doesn't mean I wouldn't fucking lose my mind for the lower one

8. Daring/Rosabella

Y'all. I'm sorry. I do love them. Don't get me wrong. They're just at the bottom. They were actually the only duo that I was even close to being sure about. I genuinely like them and if they had to play, I would be shedding tears. I feel like a lot of people would instantly go for Rosabella because of her like savior type of attitude sometimes, but I'm gonna be fr with y'all. I think Daring would actually lose. I think he would find a way around letting her lose. I know he's made out to be selfish sm, but then in the last season he kind of has that redemption arc and I actually start to like him. I think that Rosabella would try to fool him into winning, but he would possibly see through her playing with him and end up ultimately losing. It would definitely be emotional, but I feel like he would take it bravely. That might not be quite the right word, but I can't think of another good one rn so whatever.

Survivor: Rosabella

7. Darling/Daring

I KNOW. COME AT ME. This one would definitely be rough. The first thing I thought of when I saw this was that Daring would try to be the brother in the situation. He would try to protect, but I think he would fail. Darling can do anything she puts her mind to, and if she really wanted herself to lose, she would make it happen. That's just the tea y'all. I feel like there would be a moment where it looks like Daring's going to lose, and then Darling swoops in and takes that spot right out from under him. I think he would be really hurt, and I think he would feel a lot of guilt afterwards because he let that happen to his sister. There's a possibility that it could be him instead of her, which would take the path of him acting like the brother and taking the fall for her, but I just feel like she would end up losing.

Survivor: Daring

6. Cupid/Blondie

People don't talk about this ship enough, so I'm going to. Anyway, I love them. I think they're adorable and would've made a great couple. Thinking about them playing the marble game makes me want to kms bc I think it would constantly be them going back and forth and trying to get the other to take their marbles. I think Blondie would eventually convince Cupid that she needs to lose and not Cupid, and despite Cupid trying to beg her not to, Blondie lets Cupid take her marbles and she loses. It would honestly be hard to watch even though I have it at six. I would for sure cry a lot, and it would be really heartfelt. They're both just so soft when you take away their sassy and sarcastic moments. One of my favorite underrated ships.

Survivor: Cupid

5. Holly/Poppy

Just want to say how much I love these two. I love their personalities and just everything about them. I do feel like both would try to save the other. Again, it would be a back and forth battle between who's going to lose. I think that Poppy would end up being the one to lose. Holly would just give up because she sees that she's getting nowhere with Poppy. It would be extremely bittersweet and she would be nonstop crying. She would try to reason with her, but it wouldn't work. Poppy would be determined to let Holly live, so she would let herself lose.

Survivor: Holly

A/N: Here's the good shit y'all. Everyone is going to fucking HATE me. I'm so sorry in advance. My imagination really said fuck you once I got to like 3.

4. Apple/Raven

...

So. I feel like it would be giving Dragon Games LMFAO. No bc like it would be super angsty and sad. They would be fighting for each other to survive until the very end. There would be a lot of tears and a lot of just meltdowns over it. Despite the whole thing about how Raven is portrayed as the more selfless one in the friendship, I'm just gonna say it rn. Apple stopped being selfish (... only partially because she DID get herself killed to save Raven which only hurt her more but it's fine)

APPLE LOST.

She definitely lost. Raven didn't see it coming, and it just happened. Apple accepted it and that was it. Raven definitely walked away from this with guilt for the rest of her life. She would never be the same. I think she would always feel like a part of her was missing.

Survivor: Raven

3. Darling/Apple

I'll just start by saying that Apple dies. I'll explain why. LET ME EXPLAIN. PLEASE.

My take on this is, of course, that Darling loves Apple more than she will ever realize (literally no fucking shit). Everyone is made to believe that Darling is going to be the one who loses. Even Apple believes this. It makes sense that Darling would be the one to die. She's the knight in the relationship. Literally. Anyway, it just makes sense. How she is would just make complete sense. You're made to think that in the end, it's going to be Darling. It almost is. Apple really has her mind set on it being herself, but she just has a feeling that it'll be Darling. She thinks that Darling is going to find a way to lose her marbles. Then they start to get close to the end, and it clicks in Apple's mind that she can't let Darling die. She refuses to let her go. So she does what any good girlfriend would do.

Apple lets Darling get all of her marbles before Darling even realizes what Apple was doing. The minute that Darling has Apple's last marble, she just stares at her. I think she would silent cry and Apple would try to be optimistic. It would be so fucking emotional. I don't know how well I would handle it.

Survivor: Darling

2. Maddie/Raven

Banging my head against a wall because the way I would cry. I feel like everyone knows who would die. Let's just be fr. It's Maddie. Y'all can come at me, but it's Maddie. I know she's like goofy and crazy most of the time, but when it comes down to it, she absolutely loves her friends to the ends of the universe. She would do anything for them. I love her relationship with Raven, and I feel like going into it, Raven would already know that Maddie was going to lose. She would try to deny it, but she would already know. It would be gut feeling that she couldn't shake. She would try to draw the game out so that she had more time with Maddie, but it wouldn't matter because Maddie was going to die sooner or later. I think Maddie would be cracking jokes and trying to make Raven smile until she was finally killed. She would definitely know as well from the beginning that she would be the one. It wouldn't be that Raven didn't want to do it, because she really did, it would just be that Maddie felt like it should be her. Maddie wanted to let Raven live even if meant that she couldn't. This would make me bawl fr.

Survivor: Raven

2. Kitty/Lizzie

I actually just put this one on the list of ships to do, so here we go. This would be super fucking angsty. Both of them love each other a lot and don't want to watch the other one die. They know that one of them will have to die, but they want it to be themselves. It would be horrible to watch because I feel like, and don't get mad because I actually struggled to think about who would die, it would be Lizzie who lost. I can see it being Kitty. I definitely can, BUT, there's just something that makes me believe that it would truly be Lizzie in the end. I think both of them would hold it together for the most part until the end. Kitty would finally win and completely lose her shit. Lizzie would accept her fate but continuously apologize to Kitty for letting this happen. I think Kitty would tell her "it's okay" and just try to make her feel not guilty. Kitty wouldn't come out of this okay at all. I feel like she would actually go insane after watching the love of her life die.

Survivor: Kitty

A/N: GOD I FUCKING HATE MYSELF FOR DOING THESE LAST TWO. I love y'all but here comes, in my opinion, the ones that would make me want to break shit and kms. They're the full-on mental breakdown ones.

Ashlynn/Briar

I'll start this one by apologizing because I'm going to be dead serious right now. I would literally have a meltdown over this. I wouldn't be able to handle it. Their friendship is wholesome and they love each other so much that it hurts. And for the love of FUCKING GOD I AM SO SORRY BUT ASHLYNN LOSES.

I'm leaving that there.

This one is bad. It's definitely a lot of crying and "I love you's" because who doesn't lose playing a game where one of you has to die and the other has to live with that guilt for the rest of their (very possibly short) life. Briar definitely goes into the game convinced that she's going to do it. She prepares herself the entire time. She loses her mojo a few times because she feels bad that Ashlynn is crying so much and is just an emotional mess. It just reminds her of how Ashlynn would be if Briar actually lost. This one would be hard to watch. I think there would just be constant crying on both sides if I'm being completely honest. I think that everyone would seriously think it's Briar, and then you realize that it's going to be Ashlynn. There would be that moment of "wait, what the fuck did she just do?" It would be gut-churning honestly. Ashlynn was honestly always too nice, and this would be the moment when she needed to not be. Briar would tell her she needed to just let her lose so Ashlynn could walk away from this, but Ashlynn wouldn't want that. I think the second that Briar realized that it wasn't going to be her that lost, she would try to push herself harder to get rid of her marbles. In the end, it would be Ashlynn that got killed. Briar would take it really hard and she would struggle afterwards with the death of her best friend.

Survivor: Briar

A/N: ON GOD THE ONE I'VE BEEN WAITING TO TELL EVERYONE BECAUSE I WANT TO CRY RN THINKING ABT IT

Briar/Faybelle

Shaking. Crying. Screaming. Throwing up. Sobbing.

This would be really bad.

Absolutely fucking horrible to watch.

Writing the part of how this happens, I'm still unsure as to who I'm going to go with on losing, so we'll see as I keep going.

God, this is fucking hard. I can imagine it and I don't want to. It would be super angsty. Like screaming and fighting. A lot of crying. I know Faybelle normally hides all of her emotions on the show and whatever, but this would be that time that she just lets go. Going into the game, they both wanted themselves to die. It's hard to think about because on one hand, you have Briar who is the more soft one in the relationship and wants to let Faybelle survive because she loves her, but then you have Faybelle who feels guilty about how she's treated Briar in the past and she doesn't believe at all that she can continue her life without Briar. It's mostly the latter, but those are just two major points. I think that the idea of the other dying would be the fuel for wanting to lose their own marbles. They would be going back and forth the whole time. I just feel like the angst would be what hurts everyone. It would be so much screaming and crying of how they can't live without the other. We would also see a side of Faybelle that's never even been grazed, and I think that would hurt even more because the fact that Faybelle would let herself act so desperate and be so vulnerable would be an eye-opener. It would be like "oh shit, Faybelle actually fucking loves Briar and literally is about to let herself die just so she can survive." And then you have everything from Briar's pov which is "I can't live without Faybelle so I'm going to lose and she'll learn to live without me. She'll be okay." Both would have similar outlooks on it, but in the end, I genuinely believe that both would die.

Briar would let herself lose first and Faybelle would just fucking lose her mind completely. I think Faybelle would literally be on her knees and begging them to just kill her. If they didn't, she would find a way to do it herself because she can't live without Briar.

Very sob-worthy if you ask me.

Anyway, they both die. End of story. Not really but I don't want to actually write something abt this bc I would cry before I even got one paragraph in

Survivor: Neither bc I'm a bitch

[swiftfootedachilles]

Hi! You asked for an ask and I’m always down to ask so…do you have any headcanons about Mickey’s time in Mexico?

wow you managed to ask me about the only thing of this show that i HAVENT rlly thought about so hats off to you

uhhhh okay first, PRE-MEXICO. i think mickey broke out in the first place because he knew ian wasnt gonna wait for him. i think if ian didnt break up with him and dedicated himself to being a prison boyfriend (?) mickey wouldve stayed in. (i also think he wouldve found a skeevy defense lawyer who owes the milkoviches some debts and appealed his conviction bc lets be honest its total bullshit that he got locked away just based off sammi's unreliable testimony. like where the fuck was debby to lie under oath and say mickey was with her the whole time and she saw sammi take more pills than usual and go outside to move things. sorry im losing the plot this is NOT the time to discuss my s6 rewrite.) mikey haf absolutely no reason to stay in prison, stay in chicago, so i think after nearly 2 years of no visits from ian he just gave the fuck up. why not try to escape? hes smart, he can conjure up a decent plan, right? worst case scenario he goes back to prison, which didnt really fucking matter to him bc he was in prison anyway and he just. didnt care anymore.

so, he broke out and contacted ian ina last-ditch effort to get the love of his life back. he knew ian wasnt gonna wait for him, but at the docks hes obviously still shocked to hear ian moved on fast enough to have a boyfriend already. then ian agreed to go to mexico and mickey was SO READY to start LIVING HIS LIFE. he thought that would be IT. him and his lover in mexico at the beach, getting away from all the bad memories of chicago and having a place to START OVER!!! then ian changed his mind last minute and mickey was fucking CRUSHED. AGAIN. and all of a sudden now hes in mexico alone and all his previous plans went out the fucking window because he totally didnt spend the past few days rearranging his plans to revolve around ian being with him.

i dont really think a lot about mickey's time in mexico. i think he was sad. i think he was angry. i think he just did what he could to stay alive and try to move on but he never really didnt. i think he kept his head low and did his job in the cartel and tried to learn spanish but it was too fucking hard so he gave up on that pretty quickly and attached himself to the multilingual members of the gang. i definitely dont think he had a boyfriend. im sure he fucked around with other guys, but i also think he spent more time laying in his shitty apartment that he shared with like 4 other guys trying not to cry too loud thinking about what could have been.

i also dont think he worked for el chapo lmfao sorry to anyone who thinks that but the timeline doesnt even line up. and if he somehow did have a part in taking down el chapo he wouldve been put in witness protection. he probably wouldve gotten killed anyway tho

my dumb ass didnt realize he got a new tattoo until like deep into s10 and i gaslit myself into thinking it was always there LMFAO but i love that he got another tattoo there. i like to think this one was with a clean needle. i dont think this happened in canon, but MY mickey wouldve gotten a tongue piercing! perhaps other ones too. a couple other tattoos, a cartilage piercing, an eyebrow, his nipples. idk. just to change his appearance more. yeah. thats. the only reason.

anyway i think he got back into the US by working with an undercover cop and being a part of a pre-planned drug bust that included him being "arrested" and making it seem like he got extradited to the US only for being wanted. if he wouldve just waltzed into a precinct and said "hey i got dirt on this cartel" his as wouldve been killed so quickly. it needed to be a lot more covert so the other members didnt catch on and get rid of him. i do think eventually they probably figured out he was the anonymous witness whose interviewed were used in trial, which is why when he gets released in s10 the CO tells him the cartel is looking for him. sorry im going all Law & Order here talking about a s6 trial and now a trial against the cartel i need to stop

[dualityvn]

hi i recently went through a bad breakup and it rlly sucked but seeing tenebris helped a lot he’s so comfort ☺️ i’ve been playing the demo and getting his ending multiple times bc it rlly just brightens my day sm so thank you for that 💜 i also find it so cute how he doesn’t register breaking and entering as a crime and he just Goes Places 😆 the cutest fr i want to hold his head between my thighs 😌 anyway thank you again! you too tenebris!

I'm sorry to hear about your breakup, anon. I'm glad my game is helping you feel better though 💕

"Oh, wow, I didn't know I could have that effect on someone, heh. You make me feel giddy too. Screw whoever made you sad tho." - Tenebris

[afmis]

Inspired by my last post… the SONGS I’d pick for c!beeduo? SO GOOD ‼️ my c!beeduo playlist was literal genius guys

If I may share some… 😏

Friendly Neighborhood Poltergeist by Rory Webley-

I like to pretend Ghostboo never existed. But if c!beeduo had been portrayed well and cc!beeduo hadn’t been such PUSSIES ‼️ …ghostboo could’ve been SO good. Such a painful arc for them. Like a love triangle 🥰 but it’s two of the same person and their husband 💀 anyways 😭 this song always reminds me of ghostboo. How c!tubbo would’ve just ignored him in favor or missing c!ranboo. While ghostboo felt like he could’ve been better

Lovefool by The Cardigans-

A classic. Obv, after the burger arc. Where c!ranboo immediately jumps to conclusions. Tho I also feel like with the way c!tubbo was written in that arc… ya can’t blame c!ranboo 💀

Francis Forever by Mitski

Mitski is literally c!Tubbo’s artist. Her songs are literally like all in c!Tubbo’s pov. But this one I’d imagine is after c!ranboo’s death, and where he doesn’t know how to go on after

If You Leave by Orchestral Manoeuvres In The Dark

I kinda imagine, in my better canon ending. They kinda wistfully parted ways. I think this one captures that ending well (OFC in my ending they got back tg after)

It Will Rain by Bruno Mars

In my perspective, c!Tubbo was written HORRIBLY. I think bc cc!tubbo hated cc!ranboo he didn’t even try with c!beeduo’s relationship 💀 but I imagine, and I rlly wish he was written in this way, that c!Tubbo really did love c!Ranboo. He was just as smitten as canon c!Ranboo was with c!Tubbo. He just wasn’t great at expressing it, and he always thought c!Ranboo could do better. But he was secretly terrified of c!Ranboo leaving, and he didn’t want that. Ofc, “cuz there’ll be no sunshine if I lose you baby” and “if you walk away, everyday it’ll rain”. He would be devastated if c!Ranboo left, not uncaring like c!Tubbo was portrayed

Warning Sign by Coldplay

Like my last one says, I think c!Tubbo was very insecure when it came to c!Beeduo’s relationship. He 100% thought c!Ranboo deserved better and thought c!Ranboo would be better without him. So I think he would’ve let him go. I think this song would show that kinda misery that came with actually LOSING c!ranboo and not having them in his life. He’d be running into c!ranboo’s arms fr 😭

I Will Always Love You by Whitney Houston

I think in the fucked up canon where c!beeduo weren’t meant for each other in the end. They would come to the conclusion that being married wasn’t for the best. So this song would be c!Ranboo leaving bc they know they aren’t what c!Tubbo needs. C!Tubbo would need more than c!Ranboo. Hey, I never said I liked my perspective of canon c!beeduo 💀

The Exit by Conan Gray

Every time I hear this song I remember c!Beeduo and just cry. But I kinda imagine post burger arc, c!Ranboo is just heartbroken and c!Tubbo is unapathethic. They grow apart. c!Tubbo is happier away and living his life. Even months later, c!Ranboo is still left wondering what went wrong with their life and their family and trapped in the past. They haven’t healed, aka “feels like we had matching wounds, but mine’s still black and bruised and yours is perfectly fine”. They’re just sad and heartbroken 😿 c’mon c!tubbo

Save Your Tears by The Weeknd

Every since this song came out, I think around the divorce arc, I’ve immediately thought of c!beeduo. In c!Tubbo’s pov ofc. “You look so happy when I’m not with you. But then you saw me, caught you by surprise . A single teardrop falling from your eyes. I don’t know why I run away. I make you cry when I run away. You could’ve asked me why I broke your heart. You could’ve told me that you fell apart. But you walked past me like I wasn’t there. You just pretended that you didn’t care. “ and “Girl take me back cuz I wanna stay, save your tears for another- I realize that I’m much too late and you deserve someone better. “ I feel like this would either be present burger arc or post. Maybe both. c!Ranboo heartbroken and c!Tubbo realizing and wanting to fix things

Level of Concern by Twenty One Pilots

Present burger arc. “Cause I told you my level of concern, but you walked by like you never heard” I’m act not quite sure for which of them I picked this song for. Maybe c!Ranboo being worried during the whole like. c!Tubbo and c!Quackity partnering thing and c!Tubbo being oblivious/dismissing it. Or c!Tubbo being worried about them and c!Ranboo ignoring his questions due to being angry

Little Talks by Monsters and Men

I think this song fits the change from the happy-go-lucky honeymoon phase where everything is perfect, to the “uh-oh, something’s wrong” start of unraveling and distrust of their relationship. Obv, c!Tubbo is the one who is panicked and feeling unsure, while c!Ranboo is the one who is trying to comfort him

Christmas in June by AJR

This is just bc of the animatic I saw years agon💀 but I feel like it is fitting. GO WATCH THE ANIMATIC THO IT’S SO CUTE, I THINK IT’S CALLED CHRISTMAS IN JUNE. BEEDUO? ANIMATIC? IDK 😭 GO WATCH IT THO

Stray Italian Greyhound by Vienna Teng

This isn’t less of the divorce arc and more of just c!beeduo in general 😭 to where I’d imagine the canon where they wouldn’t end up enemies LMFAO. This song is SOOOOOO c!Tubbo, panicking bc he accepted he’d never have a happy ending and here comes warm, loving c!Ranboo to turn that around. So cute

When He Sees Me (a lot of artists, it’s from the Waitress musical 😭)

c!Tubbo fr. Post L’Manberg, logical and pessimistic c!Tubbo who doesn’t ever see himself finding love. But he does want to be loved and meet the one, he’s just scared because he doesn’t feel like anyone could love him

Love Like You (Steven Universe lol)

I’M SORRRYYY IK THIS ONE IS SO OVERDONE 💀 but this fits c!Tubbo so well. Sorry I love me some c!Tubbo study y’all. Once him and c!Ranboo get “platonically” married, become really close and they rlly start to love each other. c!Tubbo is like holy guacamole. He’s literally the most incredible and kind-hearted person he’s ever met and he’s just too good. Nothing like c!Tubbo. And he’s like what’s he doing with me 😿 (hence the whole “he deserves better I’m so emo” thing)

I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing by Aerosmith

This song makes me so emotional it’s so beautiful 😭 but I’d like to imagine c!Beeduo as this beautiful, loving, completely smitten relationship. I feel like in the beginning, around like March-June 2021 where they’re like wow this is new I’m like secretly in love with my platonic husband (or after they finally makeout) and we’re staring into each other’s eyes and everything’s so perfect and I’m so happy. This song is what I imagine c!Beeduo’s relationship as. Completely in love, like a dream

Strawberry Blond by Mitski

(Back to the divorce arc again LOL) c!Tubbo being oblivious and happy with his new life selling… burgers. c!Ranboo just smiling through the pain like I’m SO happy for you *ugly sobbing* but he loves c!Tubbo too much so he’ll put up with whatever

Sally’s Song (Nightmare Before Christmas)

I watched this movie for the first time around the c!Beeduo divorce arc. Yeah ik 💀 but when I heard this song I was like HOOOOOOOO THIS IS THEM FR ‼️ naw bc like “I sense there’s something in the wind that feels like tragedy’s at hand. And though I’d like to stand by him, can’t shake this feeling that I have. The worst is just around the bend. And does he notice my feelings for him? When will he see how much he means to me? I think it’s not to be” LITERALLY the whole song is c!Ranboo I’m just not gonna copy and paste the entire thing 😭 in the canon I think c!Ranboo would be the one who’s aware that the burger arc can only lead to bad things, and c!Tubbo’s oblivious (HE WOULD NOT BE BUT 🙄). Alas, c!Ranboo doesn’t want to say anything and silently supporters c!Tubbo’s decision, knowing c!Tubbo is ignoring c!Ranboo’s feelings

I Love You So by The Walters

I would play this song on loop just thinking abt c!Beeduo back then 😭 and every time I hear it I’m like ah. The gays. “You’re saying I’m the one but it’s your actions that speak louder” c!Ranboo seeing c!Tubbo isn’t SHOWING that he loves c!Ranboo. “I’ve got to get away and let you go, I gotta get over… but I love you so” c!Ranboo knowing he needs to leave c!Tubbo but he loves him too much to leave. “I hope you feel what I felt when you shattered my soul, cuz you were cruel and I’m a fool, so please let me go” c!Ranboo eventually building resentment and leaving

Happier by Olivia Rodrigo

“Oh, I hope you’re happy. But not like how you were with me. I’m selfish, I know. I can’t let you go. So find someone great, but don’t find no one better. I hope you’re happy, but don’t be happier. “ c!Ranboo would 100% be the bitter ex-wife who loves c!Tubbo but also wishes him the worst LOL. He’d be like “yeah we’re done and I don’t wanna be with you, I hope whoever you end up with or whatever you end up doing doesn’t make you happy”

Feeling Lonely by boy pablo

“Can’t help it, I just miss you. How did I lose you now again? “ c!Tubbo. After the burger arc, c!Ranboo is bitter, distances himself, starts spending less time in snowchester and with c!tubbo, talks to him less and less until he’s not even there anymore. c!Tubbo finally stops being oblivious and is like “pookie what happened 😕💔” and turns into actual devastation bc he’s actually sad that c!Ranboo’s gone and he lost him

Alr folks 😭 that’s it. I’ll link my sloppy, unfinished (and probably will never be finished) c!beeduo playlist if desired. Y’all can take a look if desired :) if you actually got this far, I commend you. But I probably would’ve as well 💀 I’m desperate for any ounce of c!beeduo I can get. LOVE YOU, BYE!

playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5BmmigtYA6GkOfFpaiFMda?si=uzocViyuRSyjK6scrJeKfA&pi=u-hU4qqT47SwqK

[iki-gai-lotvs]

RATING ROR CHARACTERS (my personal opinion)

(from anime and manga) !!SPOILERS!!

GUYS MY SPELLING AND GRAMMAR SUCK NO JUDGING RN IM WRITING THIS AT 1 AM 

HUMAN SIDE

Brunhilde: 9/10 shes funny i like her and her character, esp when she had to like hide her feelings and stuff rlly hit deep

Göll: -0/10 shes like paimon 2.0 her voice is really annoying stfu

Lu Bu: 7/10 he was kinda scary looking when i first saw him and he still is but hes kinda cool

Adam: 9/10 love him for being a supportive husband yk but omg when he died it was so sad 

Raiden: 7/10 didnt like him at first, but he grew on me 

Jack the ripper: -0/10 ☠️

Nikolai Tesla: 10/10 I LOVE HIM HES SO FUNNY AJAJJAGJANGJNRJGAUGNUNIG i love his personality and his face hes cute

Buddha: 7/10 I have no big opinion on him, hes cool yk 

Qin Shi Huang: 10/10 dude, when i first saw him in the manga i was like damn im smelling a whole fruit bowl here BUT I LITERALLY LOVE HIM CUS HIS CHARACTER DESIGN IS SO COOL

Gods: 

Thor: 6/10 his like character design is so like anime?? idk how to explain?? it just like not my tastes yk 

Zeus: 7/10 HES SO SILLY AND WACK HE LOOKS LIKE A DRIED UP RAISIN 

Poseidon: 10000/10 smash dude hes so hot LIKE HELLO WHY AM I LIKE KICKING MY FEET WATCHING HIM hes probably like my fav character yk maybe below shiva tho 

Shiva: 1000/10 I literally watched the show bc my friend showed me a clip of him and i was like holy shit augbnjgbaunjguawnogutuaojwbu I LOVE HIS CHARACTER HE HAS A FUNNY PERSONALITY but like fr he lowkey got nerfed also dude him and that other guy i think his name was like rudva dude like i smell a whole fruit bowl right there 

Zerofuku 8/10: His backstory WAS SO SAD UGHHHHH but i lub him hes so skrunkle

Hades: 1000/10 LOVE HIM SM TOO WAS SO SAD HE GOT ELIMINATED CUS I LOVED HIM CUS HE JUST WANTED TO AVENGE HIS BROTHER N STUFF but like his character design first shocked me cus like yk hades?? but its ok i forgive my little skrunkle poo

Beelzebub: 1000/10  Also one of my faves i think his like staff and power stuff is mad wicked 

NON FIGHTERS

Odin: 5/10 hes ok his hair looks like a sofa though HIS CROWS R FUNNY THOUGH

Loki: 6/10 hes ok hes mad weird tho w the faces he makes n stuff like ummm

Adamas: 3/10 why he give me the epper jeepers

Ares: 1000/10 best character he was so funny everyone else was boring compared to him

Aphrodite: 0/10 im sorry but literally what was the point of her character other than being sexualized for having big boobs ☠️ deadass luv aphrodite in greek mythology could have had sm potential but literally hate her 

THE GUY THAT LOOKS LIKE HES FROM BLACK BUTLER 7/10: HES OK HES KINDA HOT YK BUT I FORGOT HIS NAME LMFAOOO

[evansbby]

OMGGMGG the new chapter of WG!!!!!!  You have out done yourself again girlie!! 💕💕 So I reread WG before reading UTI (HELLPPP it’s supposed to stand for under the influence😭💀💀) so I could remebe everything. We cna rlly see how much of a fucking bitch ari is I’m actually so upset. I love to be so main character when reading that I act out everything that’s happening while reading so i was crying so much bc I love angst sometiems even though it hurts. Ok so let’s Do a breakdown: Spotting Ari from across the room and he already has his sights on her. Getting the context about what went down after WG was kinda sad like making eye contact w him on campus while hes with Sharon and he has the nerve to look sheepish he’s so mean. And the texts from him when the last one said Fuck you. I have other options s. Just made me feel so unspecial. Like he was probably fucking other girls right along with reader. Curtis showing up🙈🙈 he made a fruity pink drink for her 😍😍 but I’m pretty sure he drugged it or laced it so we knew what he rlly wanted to do with her. When Ari said I’m your daddy  SKSJSKSJSK I WAS WAITING FKR THAT PARTTT!! I rlly hated how he made her take the drugs tho like come on if you cared abt her u wouldn’t do that 😕😕 and the guys in the background pointing out how intoxicated she is when they were fucking like no come on 😭😭 But that scene was so fucking hot I can’t lie 😈😈😈 and then I liked that he shielded her up to the bathroom. My favourite part was when Ari and reader were in the bathroom and laughing and tickling each other AND HE CLEANED HER UP!!! and it was so sweet like he actually cared and that made me so happy and then he switched and it made me so mad bc he was being so mean like if he didn’t like Sharon just break up liek you’re already cheating on her you idiot. And I would honestly be so fucking distraught if this happened to me and I am naive sometiems so I honestly feel like I would have fallen for this too 😔😔🙏 but losing your virginity to a guy who does not give two shits about u???  (Or does he??😏😏) But it broke my heart like he just left her there on the counter after she begged him to stay (when he said Sharon’s drunk and she said I’m drunk too 🥲🥲 and he just left) and she just sat in the tub and cried??  and then when she was outside and she met Steve I thought it would be so sweet he was so nice and he had such light aura vibes like I thought he would be a sweetheart (he was not 💀). And then when Sharon stumbled over that description made me so sad. Like she’s so beautiful obviously feelings of insecurity rise up in reader bc ofc Ari would chose her over me and I like to make things extra dramatic and Ik it’s reader insert so it doesn’t apply to everyone but I’m brown so seeing the guy choose the pretty blonde girl but keeping you as his semi secret side piece probably definitely hurts and makes you feel like you’re not good enough. I rlly wish Sharon threw up on Ari when she said she didn’t feel good😭💀💀And Ari ls such a fucking dick thinking that he had the right to still call her baby after that shit went down in the bathroom but it’s apparent that he kind of cares for her or is it possessiveness?? Idk I just wish he made her feel wanted like that’s so sad. And the battle of choosing to stay or go? I wanted her to go but I didn’t know Steve would pull that shit. And then when Steve seemed disappointed that they were going back to her place I just knew he was bad news. And slipping the cab driver money 🫢🫢 Making her call him daddy and choking her just like Ari did, déjà vuuu. But then he walked her to her door 🥰🥰🥰(the bar is on the floor). And then plugging her phone in and getting all those messages from Ari but just not having the energy to respond bc she know she won’t get anywhere like my heart felt like it was going through the wringer. I listened to that song Jacob and the stone during every single sad part and ugh my heart 💔💔 

Now for the questions:

Idk if I’m team Steve or Ari 😭 Ari def feels some sort of possessiveness over reader, and he doesn’t care for Sharon so what’s stopping him? He lied to her so many times and manipulates her a lot BUT HE CARESS. And then Steve, at first I thought he only sought her out for revenge against Ari but we learn that he didn’t know her and Ari were connected (side note: also reader still doesn’t know that Steve is the captain and not just a player on the other team and that Ari and him are rival rivals) so that means he did have some interest in her but that too seemed to be even more misguided after he found out abt them. Does he want her for her? (meaning her body bc did he ever actually care abt her for her and not her body bc I can’t tell after he seemed so disappointed in not heading back to his place) He’s really mean like meaner than Ari and he honestly makes me feel unsafe 😭😭 so actually I think I’m going to pick team Ari. Ari just has to change  but he’s daddy so I know he will😔🙏🙏. But I’m really excited to explore the love triangle so we’ll see but I rlly want her and Ari to end up together lik it just seems right. 

They’re rival team captains but maybe their families are super rich so they just grew up in the same social circle and they’ve been competing in everything since they were kids whether that be in who has the best marks, cars, girls, etc.

Ari has confused feelings for reader. (Also completely off topic I’m srry but I forgot to mention when he said that he never used condoms with Sharon and mentioned knocking reader up bc he always fucks her raw and comes deep inside of her (I loved that part) 🤭🤭🤭 and that he would always used condoms with Sharon, that means that reader is special 🤭🤭but yeah Ari def is confused maybe he’s never felt real feelings towards a girl befor and he likes reader? Loves her?🤞🏽🤞🏽I don’t trust Steve but also it’s understandable that he may seem like a better option bc he isn’t shy to show that he wants reader even tho he is just using her ☹️☹️

Okay so that concludes my rant. I am honestly so so sorry I know this was really long please forgive me 😭😭 but whenever I read I always have to write my thoguhts down and word vomit every single  thing that comes to mind so eveyrhinf is so all over the place and there’s probably typos bc I’m rambling I’m rlly sorry. This chapter was so good and I’m so excited for the next part 💃🏽💃🏽💃🏽 thank you so much for sharing with us hoes 💕🤍🤍

-🦕

DINO ANON OMFG?!? THIS REVIEW?!? AHHHHH THANK U THANK U THANK U🩷🩷🩷✨✨

OK FIRSTLY WHY IS IT UTI OMFG HELP I didn’t even realise that 😭😭

Omg Ari’s texts 😭😭 “fuck you I have other options” I mean he does but he’s texting reader obsessively multiple times so he obviously has a preference of who he wants to be with 😭😭 boys are so dumb fr fr fr

And omf the bathroom scene 😢😢 I deliberately made them have a sweet moment where they were laughing and he actually cleaned her up when before he never did any aftercare at all! Bc I knew that this way it would hit harder when he left her all alone in the bathroom. AND YES ahhh it broke my heart too when reader quietly said “I’m drunk too…” bc it’s like… he cares that Sharon is drunk but what about reader??? 😢😢😢😢😢😢

It’s so important to me abojt what you said about being a brown girl so it hits extra hard. Bc as a brown girl myself, a lot of the times this is how I feel 😢😢 They always pick the white girl… no matter how hard we try or how good we look for them… we’re always the secret hookup and never the girlfriend and now that you mentioned it, it kinda validates my feelings too LIKE DO WE ALL LIVE THE SAME LIFE FR 😢😢😢

BUT also it’s funny you mentioned how you hope Sharon threw up on Ari after Steve and reader left bc SHE DID! I actually wrote that!!! But it didn’t sound quite right so I cut it out and I meant to go back and rewrite it but I forgot!!! But Sharon DID throw up on Ari that’s why Ari didn’t immediately go after Steve and reader before they got lost in the crowd 😭😭😭😭😨😨😨

As for Steve, YES YES YES I dropped little hints throughout about him being a red flag… the way he was so forward, the things he was saying, the way he was acting, how he was so touchy when he didn’t even know her??? BABY READER NEEDS TO BEWARE OF THIS MAN!!!

And yes, he choked reader just like Ari did, and he even said the same line: “do it or I’ll choke you the fuck out” I think you and maybe two other people noticed this from what I’ve read!!! HMMMMMMM

Also yes the bar is literally on the FLOOR and that’s why I think people are thinking Steve is this sweet and nice guy when really… 🤭🤭🤭🥲🥲

I want to reply in more detail but my app is getting all slow which means it’s gonna crash any second but one last thing YES YES THE PART WHERE ARI SAID HE WOULD NEVER FUCK HER HOW HE FUCKS SHARON AND HE WOULD NEVER KNOCK SHARON UP AHHHHHH I LOVED WRITINF THAT PART THANK YOU FOR RECOGNISINF IT

[burgundykicks]

1. "I love you ,its ruining my life" WAS NOT EXPECTION THAT IN FORNIGHT ,A TRACK 1?

I absolutely love the beat tho and I'm so exited for the music vid

2. HOLY SHIT THIS GD TITLE TRACK IS GIVING RED TO ME?

LIKE CAN YOU HEAR THE RED? I MF LOVE IT

"This ain't the Chelsea Hotel ,we're modern idiots"

"You left your typewriter at my apartment ,straight from the Tortured Poets department"

NOT WHAT I WAS EXPECTING DAMN

3. "I clean up sandcastles he destroys"

NOOOOOOO

"Left all these broken parts ,and told me I'm better off"

STOP IT PLEASE

4. "For a minute I knew cosmic love ,now I'm down back crying at the gym"

TELL ME THATS NOT WOLFSTAR/JEGULUS CODED?!?!?

Actually this whole song is giving wolfstar

"Everything comes out ,teenage petulance"

SIRIUS AND THE PRANK

5. TRACK FIVE OH GOD

"How much sad did you ,think I had ,did I have in me?"

STOPPP HELPNO ILL CRY

(INTERRUPTION TO SAY SHES JUST ANNOUNCED 15 EXTRA SONGS HOLY FUCK?!?!?!? SHES A MACHINE BRO)

6. "I only know these people raise you ,to cage you"

THIS SONG OMDS IT HITS SO HARD

"I'm having his baby ,no I'm not ,but you should see your faces"

Giggled bc that's rlly funny

7. "Now pretty baby I'm running back home to you ,fresh out the slammer I know who my first call will be to"

AHHHHHHHH

8. FLORENCEEEEEE

"I need to forget so take me to florida ,I got some regrets ill Bury them in florida"

9. "My boredoms bone deep"

"Am I allowed to cry"

"Someone told me ,there's no such thing as bad thoughts. Only your actions talk"

"If its make beleive ,why does it feel like a vow"

MARAUDERS FANDOM THOUGH

10. "You don't get to tell me about sad"

NO OMG THE WAY SHE SCREAMS THE TITLE HURTS SO MUCH

"Is it a wonder I broke let's hear one more joke ,then we could all just laugh until I cry"

"Who's afraid of little old me, well you should be"

"So tell me everything is not about me ,but what if it is? Then say they didn't do it to hurt me ,but what if they did? I wanna snarl and show you just how disturbed this has made me. You wouldn't last an hour in the asylum where they raised me."

Fuck

11. "But your good lord doesn't need to lift a finger ,I can fix him (no really I can)"

"He had a halo of the highest grade ,he just hadn't met me yet"

12. "Black and white ,all those plot twists"

The noble and most ancient house of black.

"I wish I could un recall ,how we almost had it all"

"It was legendary ,it was momentary"

13. TRACK 13!

"Cuz I'm a real tough kid ,I can handle my shit"

"Lights camera bitch smile ,even when you wanna die"

"I'm so depressed I act like it's my birthday everyday"

"I cry alot but I am so productive, it's an art"

"Cuz I'm miserable ,and no one even knows"

14. "Was any of it true ,gazing at me starry eyed"

"And I don't even want you back I just want to know ,if rusting my sparkling summer was the goal"

"And I would have died for your sins ,but instead I just died inside"

15. "Honestly ,who are we to fight the alchemy"

"This happens once every few lifetimes"

16. Last track before bonuses/the doubke album omgggg

"All your life did you know, you'd be picked like a rose"

"No one in my small town thought I'd see the lights of manhattan"

"You look like ,stevie nicks in 75 ,the hair and lips ,crowd goes wild at her fingertips ,a half moon shine ,a full eclipse"

MARAUDERSMARAUDERSMARAUDERSMARAUDERS

"Promise to be dazzling"

"You look like taylor swift in this life were loving it ,you've got edge she never did ,the futures bright ,dazzling"

I'LL POST A RANKING WHEN I DECIDE BUT AHHHHHH

[jrueships]

I think Jalen and Gup will still remain friends but I hope whoever is leaking these video suffer a faith worst than… lol

literally!!! say it louder!! like the de-realism of it all. the 'ENTERTAINMENT' of it all. It's entertainment>emotions always, and it's soo sick. Their relationship is strong still, which I love, but ever since that leak.. it's been overanalyzed and picked apart EXHAUSTINGLY!! Ppl are going back to any material they can find of the two together and just heaping BUCKETS of immaturity onto them. Talkin like 'oh see? This random dude with them made an expression THAT MEANS HE KNOWS AND HE H A T ES THEM. HE IS DISGUSTED.' and it's just SOOOO. UGH. ICK! UGH! i'd zay go find a hobby but being homophobic is literally their hobby. It's just so blatant and disgusting, and media is a GREAT tool for them to dish all that shit out without consequence. The way they can and DESIRE to constantly go back and pick apart the past just from the chance that it can spread even more hate is UGHHHH!!! i HATE it!!! Boundaries aren't SHIT anymore! Respect is trodden and relationships can get rotten AND NO ONE CARES!!!!!

It's a really good thing that jalen green's nature and upbringing as one of the hyped top picks has kind of steadied him through this. He doesn't turn off his comments (for what I know), he's BEEN getting painted nail comments and he just keeps painting them bcs who gives af? They're internet people. He's the People's people.. without even caring about the worser half of that lot. He doesn't care. But it's also kind of sad. But that's just how this world is

What im worried about mainly is gup like... gup's always been more attentive to any kind of hate or would-be hate he gets. Green's even noticed it bcs interacting with the haters (on an image level) is never a good thing. HE'S been forced to learn and get with that kinda practice bcs he's jalen green. He can't speak more as jalen green bcs. He's jalen green. He can only have the comforts of an allowed argument ..in the comforts of a fuckin burner account.

That's one thing I like about Kd, although he might not be a fav player of mine (I just personally don't rlly care for him but can understand why others do. He's very complex and way more interesting than the media tries to portray. I just kinda missed the kd era in bball and moved on, it's just a personal whatever) .. he stopped (for the most part of what we know) with the burners and uses his voice a lot. He's older, he doesn't gaf about not giving a fuck. He doesn't HAVE to , and he doesn't WANT to. He embraces being a hater and a speaker now. Unlike Jalen and Josh, he has more abilities AND experience.

Which is just so sad that alot of the things basketball players need to worry abt can be from off the court. And We're not talking being a role model or whatever, We're talking always having to watch your back ESPECIALLY when your work environment can get very quickly hostile as it is so often sold as hostility being a propelling marketing principle. Nobody can have fun anymore or be kids or a lot of things.

LIKE!!! gup can't defend himself well because he's not trained well enough as someone who's a lower pick so therefore less worry to the business. Bro is just a pawn they can trade away whenever shit gets rough. AND IT'S SO SAD THAT HE H A S TO EVEN GET TRAINING IN THE FIRST PLACE??? on how to WHAT?? Feel less? IT'S SOO. UGHHHHHH!!

When gup posted that picture of him and a woman (with like long pink pedicure nails) holding his face where he was tryin to make it look chill even tho it was very obvious on how hard he was trying to show how that hand holding his face was very obviously a woman's hand and not a man's ... as a 'response' to that video....... like. I saw it n i didn't even screenshot. And yall KNOW me, i love taking photos of things i find funny n sharing it with yall! BUT JUST YALL. YALL CIRCLE OF FRIENDS. not to THE PERSON, not blasting smthin that could be embarrassing all over the media. There's BOUNDARIES to shit, even the smallest shit! But what i meant with this is.. u know. Usually i enjoy kinda embarrassing moves. But this? This was just str8 up Sad. Like. That was all he could even do to try and defend himself, his friendships, his LIFEstyle. That was the only power he had was some miserably pr picture without pr in a sad attempt at personal protection.

And of course, the rest of the internet thought it was the funniest shit ever and blew that boundary up. Bcs they don't gaf and the best (perhaps only) thing these young guys can do is try and not gaf either AND THAT IS SO FUCKIN SAD!!! LIKE! THAT'S JUST SAD. I get sadness can be entertainment, yeah... FICTIONAL sadness, i can SEE. an ARTFUL, blossoming yet still Respecting some boundaries while exploring others, FICTIONAL (saying this AGAIN) sadness can be quality entertainment. Quality as in ure not an absolute shithead for sharing it if you still respect it.

BUT THIS SHIT IS REALLL! AND IT'S NOT GETTING RESPECTED. A REAL THING THAT ACTUALLY REQUIRES THAT RATHER THAN A FICTIONAL THING BCS RESPECT IS AND SHOULD BE REAL but it's just NOT so much anymore and UGHHHH!!!!

Their friendship is REAL! THEIR LIVES AND EMOTIONS AND THOUGHTS N FUCKIN EVERYTHING ABOUT THEM IS REAL BCS THEYRE REAL HUMAN BEINGS JUST LIKE EVEEYONE ELSE!!! and it's just so DISGUSTING that a reminder and a worry even has to be made but that's just how the world runs when it's ran on entertainment, i fuckin Guess .

[wifiwuxians]

quick aside for my moment of befuddlement because ive always misunderstood the idiom "like a house on fire" LOL. i always thought it was a passive aggressive way of saying "dude, we would destroy each other lets not talk" so when i first read that I was like ??? context??? doesnt match??? did they misunderstand the idiom? DID I? then i googled it and you're right lol its a nice thing. (tho now i wanna put that in a fic bc i think that would be a delightful misunderstanding for characters to have). IM SO GLAD I MADE UR FUNK SLIGHTLY LESS FUNKY THO. you're great and you're super sweet ;w; if i had more self-confidence, i would definitely jump at the opportunity to befriend. maybe when i get more gutsy

BACK TO THE SONG LAN HATE THO. im sorry, im still in shock. just HOW. also..... how is my interpretation of them not the common one??? again, i stay so strictly to my lane i didnt know other lanes existed and i definitely dont want to hear about it bc i think song lan hate would hurt my heart. it already hurts my heart sometimes when i see xue yang hate and XUE YANG DESERVES IT. literally i despair at media literacy sometimes. i absolutely cannot understand how anyone consumed the same content as we did and decided to be mean to song lan.

YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY A FAVORITE ARTIST, DUDE. have you fucking SEEN your stuff?!? like, are you as blind as xiao xingchen? (my sweetie, may he forever regain his sight). your art is GORGEOUS. absolutely worthy of being a fav artist and i am sure im not the only one. for starters, your pieces always have a depth to them that sets them in a scene so freaking beautifully EVEN WHEN THERES NO BG or even in your more simplified styles. when you come out with a "silly phone doodle of xue yang", i see the freaking SKILL needed to make THAT adorable lil gremlin as just a 'silly doodle'. like BRO, youre so skilled that i think youve lost depth of how good an artist you really are. i wish i was smarter with art words so i could tell you in color theory exactly why your colors are so beautiful but im dumb and all i know is "color pretty" BUT SINCE I CAN PORTRAY STUFF WITH WORDS SOMETIMES i'll try to just express how your colors alone can evoke emotion and tell a story, how you use the contrast to make your art pop off the page, the way that the colors caress a scene and show so much more inside. its beautiful, your art is beautiful, i can look at a piece for such a long time and still find interesting details that make me smile. oki i'll stop beng weird now but like NEVER DOUBT YOU'RE FREAKING SKILL BRO. (shit i didnt even get to how your animations just break my brain oeuihgo i love)

lolololol dw abt telling me about the cannibalisms piece, i look Specifically disrespectfully at that one. not big into cannibalism but damn dude, there is a Mood to that piece and frankly, something that messed up sort of suits them on their worst days euorhgioeurh i like me a fluff au or a fix-it fic but damn those two can get Dark.

My otps are often rarepairs ;A; i never do it on purpose, im normally jumping headfirst into a more popular ship but then i just See the potential in two other lil guys and im like.... holdup, wait is no one else seeing those two??? AM I THE ONLY ONE WITNESSING THIS? (yes, yes i am). And the hyperfixation begins and its just me alone at a bar with no bartenders so i make my own food. but im a weird lil guy so my cocktails are always strange and im alone at the bar lol. tbh songxue is one of my LESS rarepair rarepairs. like... theres actually fics that i didnt write for them LOL. (there was one fandom where there were 40 fics for a ship and i wrote all 40. i am a sad and lonely lil loser lol)

(scuse me one of my fav artists said they think i'd write my otp well, i can die happy oaierhgoeirh i actually do write ff for songxue but hahaha im still just a silly anon but its rlly good to know that the person i think characterizes them best in the fandom (that ive seen) thinks i would do a good job with them aoeghuihr thankyou for the high praise, i guarantee i dont deserve it)

(sometimes i've wondered if the reason you draw/write them so well is bc you dont ship them? weird take but like, shippers have shipping goggles right? we see what we wanna see a lot of the time. but since you just think they'd be neat standing next to each other (much agree), you actually put thought into their characterizations and personality instead of just "this is how they'd F*CK" or smth similar. and bc the personalities and stuff mean way more to me than sexy stuff (thats the whole reason i ship them! their personalities!) the fact that even your crack stuff has such a good basis in who they are as people makes your content just so good. whereas sometimes i see content by shippers (no disrespect meant, everyone ships in their own way), its very actively ooc, usually for a kink fill, and im just... but what abt their personalities? what abt the whole reason i think they'd be good together if given the chance?! WHAT ABOUT THEM? and then u come around drawing them like that and i just wish more people portrayed them the way you do. this isnt meant as like an anti-smut thing, i like smut, its just that sometimes pwp is just two strangers who happen to have the character names of my blorbos and literally nothing else in common and theyre my BLORBOS. more power to people who like that stuff, i will stay in my lane and bother this poor lovely person who doesnt even like the ship but is kind enough to see their potential to be pals cuz damn im in it for the emotions)

heh heh yeah it means we'd get along well but i like that interpretation too and think it would make a great story!! here's to you becoming more gutsy! (though again you're very free to use an alt or something!)

genuinely why i don't go looking lmao... song lan fans are so fucking strong to have to deal with the shit people have said BUT nowadays the climate seems to be a lot better :D i see lots of thirst for him at least KFHKDJ and my appreciation post of him has 800 notes so that's hopeful at least! but same i don't get it at all (though honestly i will say a lot of character hate stems from shipping. legit.) but yeah regarding xy hate for me it's gotta be for the "right" reasons LMAO

LJHLFHFD ALL THE COMPLIMENTS MY BRAIN CANT TAKE EM!!!! genuinely!!! THANK YOU!!!! i do often tell myself 'your stuff doesn't have to be perfect it just has to spark joy' to feel better about not rendering a piece to hell and back and mostly taking the lazy route, though this year i really wanna branch out and try more! but all of this has shot me in the heart... emotion to me is the most important part of art, and one of my favorite responses to get is laughter, and you don't need a 4K HD piece for that haha BUT LISTEN YOURE NOT WEIRD EVERY ARTIST I KNOW WOULD KILL TO HEAR THIS im gonna frame it. but after ive printed and eaten another copy like wow you think i set the scene ;_; will cry (agsjdhf sorry i really do read everything im just. PROCESSING!!!)

ahaha yeah for sure! i do love me some cannibalism (i am the cannibal friend) but absolutely that was just intended as a very dark place. song lan has Had it (the premise was xy thinking hey, he likes me, let me remove the nails i am sure everything will be fineOHNOOO)

oh dude i have chronic rarepair disease. most of what i ship is stuff i've come up with myself so any content is me + 2 souls maximum who i have managed to drag with me and make content KSGKFJ (case in point, xuechao) i just have this compulsion to do what nobody else has done

(you do deserve it! and dont go looking i wanna keep being the one who portrays them best :p)

and hey maybe because YES!!!! my work almost exclusively stems from personality oh my god thank you for acknowledging that i think that is the highest praise of all... how their personalities gel together is SUPER important for me, shipping or otherwise!! i'm telling you you and i would get along really well since we agree on the fundamentals i think! like yeah there's nothing wrong with some good old self indulgence but ooc takes me out of stuff a fair bit, and trust me i feel like most people would think MY stuff is ooc! but the thing about the strangers with blorbo names made me laugh so hard lhKDHJAfhsg i am so guilty of that in the past, i've read my old stuff and i'm just like damn. i just projected onto these dudes. NO MORE (it is bound to still happen privately but hey, ultimately, write what you want to read)

song lan and xue yang, in the 'if given the chance' realm, have exactly my favorite type of duo dynamism which is why i cannot stop drawing them lol like some funky spin on boke/tsukkomi... generally speaking ">:D -_-" is visually my favorite thing to draw haha and again! i wanna say it's not an all-out global dislike, i just a) understand most people are NOT coming at it from where i am so it doesn't interest me/makes me sad, and B) understand WHY people wouldn't be into it. because wow. um. ouch. that sure is some shit

i am gonna take a moment to plug an author i think you might really enjoy, pomegranites on ao3 (@pometogo on here!) ! i can't speak for Every flavor in there being to your tastes but there are definitely a fair few fics that made me bonkers, namely not easily let go, written for song lan love week :D