#it's frustrating and boring; and the story can never let them win completely because then their story ould be over | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thrillridesz · 3 years

Text

heart racing ▫ j.yn

in part of the adrenaline rush! collab hosted by @lucas-wongs + @ickjun

⇢ pairing: jaehyun x reader (f) (ft. other nct members + twice’s jeongyeon)

⇢ genre: fluff, angst, racer!au, best friends to lovers

⇢ warnings: swearing, mentions of cheating, mentions and consumption of alcohol, alcoholism, hitting rock bottom

⇢ synopsis: once a revered member of the racing industry, jaehyun has been living at rock bottom for the past few months following a tragic accident that effectively put him out of racing. it seems as though nothing would get through to him, not even you. will he ever break out of the constant loop of doubt and start seeing things for what they really are?

⇢ word count: 8.04k

⇢ a/n : unedited! also posted on this account because I’m considering merging my nct account with my tbz writing blog also PLEASE check out the other writers’ works ^^ we’ve all worked hard on our fics

“Jaehyun, you’re ruining yourself.”

The dim room reeked of stale alcohol and something mouldy as the empty beer bottles that littered the floor clanged noisily against the surrounding furniture, leaking golden yellow liquid all over. Old, worn clothes were draped everywhere, stained and darkened with murky stains while the battered television flickered weakly to live, showing nothing but static. The walls were streaked and striated with scratches, as if someone had just been clawing desperately at them and on the floor amidst the empty glass bottles, were pieces of scrap poster paper. Sunlight peeks in through the drawn blinds, giving a teasing glimpse to the bustling outside world from the sad, decrepit apartment Jaehyun lived in.

Sprawled on the couch with nothing on except a wrinkled pair of jeans, Jaehyun’s eyes were devoid of emotion - blank and dazelike. In his hand, his fingers held on limply to the neck of yet another bottle of beer, possibly his nth for the day. His usually shiny hazel brown hair was greasy with filth and his bare chest was sticky with sweat from being cooped up all day in this tiny, stuffy apartment of his. His jawline was starting to grow a hint of stubble given how much he’d completely let himself go and dark circles were appearing underneath those intense eyes of his.

Slowly, Jaehyun lifted his gaze from the floor to look at you, the first flicker of emotions that he’d ever displayed in the whole day. You stood before him, arms akimbo, your gaze sharp and piercing. He smiled, a smile that held no mirth or happiness.

“Oh, you’re still here.”

You shook your head, ripping the bottle of beer from his grasp. As you approached, the bottles, clothes and torn pieces of paper on the ground almost made you trip and you tutted under your breath.

“Of course I am. I’m your best friend who is somehow still here with you. Best friends help each other.”

He chuckled nonchalantly, waving his hand at the door. “Well, feel free to leave then. I don’t need your help.” His eyes held a hint of anger as he did, something that did not escape your notice.

“Jaehyun,” you said softly, placing the bottle on a nearby table as you dread what was to come next. “Please, not this again.”

Your words only served to fuel the fiery spark of anger in his eyes as he said in a barely controlled tone, the irritation radiating from him in ripples that threatened to evolve into waves, “Why not? I’m a fucking wreck and a loser anyways. Leave like everyone else did. Leave like…” His voice wobbled, “leave like Jeongyeon did.”

Your heart fell and it took almost a godlike willpower not to let your emotions show. Was he still thinking about her?

“Jaehyun-”

“What? Are you gonna say I’m not a loser like you always do? Cut the fucking lies. Everyone out there is saying the same thing, what makes you think you can convince me that you’re not thinking it either? Hm?” He spat, the drowsiness in his demeanour dissipating fast as red hot anger replaced it. There was so much internal frustration within Jaehyun that just seeing him like this was enough to break your heart. It was one thing to see him in this terrible state but it was quite another to see him directing his anger towards you.

You drew in a deep breath, trying to calm your pounding heart and to stop the tears that pricked at the corner of your eyes. Having been there with him every step of the year ever since the both of you were children playing and horsing around the neighbourhood, you found yourself desperately missing those much simpler times and wondering how things became so wrong.

For as long as you could remember, Jaehyun had always been interested and had a natural flair for racing. There always existed a competitive streak in him that thrived off a challenge. It didn’t matter what it was, as long as it was a game that could have a clear winner or incited competitiveness, he was all up for it. As kids, the two of you used to compete over everything, be it for the last popsicle in the convenience store down the street or past the gates of your school. It was as if racing was something he needed in order to live. It wasn’t until sophomore year of high school did Jaehyun decide to take his love for racing to a professional level. He began to dive deep into the motorsport industry, starting out as a mere rookie in auto racing. He never did apply to college, preferring instead to invest all his time into his newfound life career.

His rise to fame was quick, quicker than most. Within his first year, he had won a number of races, beating even some of the well known names in the sport. Every other month, he was winning trophies and exorbitant cash prizes which in return earned him the recognition of famous sponsors and racers. Bumper stickers from the various sponsors decorated the back of his ride and it was no time at all before Jaehyun began to don some of the most expensive sports gear on the tracks. With his smouldering good looks, he also appeared on the front pages of magazines and newspapers, all while attracting a loyal fanbase made up of both racing enthusiasts and adoring admirers.

To everyone else, he was the suave, handsome and effortlessly cool young racer who was practically born to race and to do it well but to you, he was your childhood friend… and your first love. In front of the flashing lights and cameras, Jaehyun knew his way around the crowd. He knew exactly when to flash one of his dazzling, dimpled smiles and how to work the crowd - it was just one of his innate charms. Yet, you knew that underneath that, that flashy, extravagant Jaehyun, was the Jaehyun you grew up with and had gradually fallen in love with.

As children, he was there for you whenever you needed him, always ready to lend a helping hand when he noticed that you were stuck in an unfavourable situation. You distinctly remember what had happened in second grade. It was a bright and warm summer’s day, the lovely scent of sweet peas floating in the air as the sun bore down on the earth. Pigeons flitted over the sidewalks, pecking at the cemented floor and the leaves of the oak trees that lined the streets rustled gently in the wind.

You fell with a loud and heavy thud on your bottom, feeling the leaves crunch noisily under your weight. Fear and trepidation coursed through your veins as you stared with eyes wide at your tormentors.

“Look at her, she looks pathetic. Do it, Johnny! Do it!”

A tall, hunkering boy flanked by his cronies stood over you, his dark, massive shadow engulfing you as you frantically scrambled backwards. Tears were beginning to stream down your face and a sharp pain shot up your spine with each move, owing to the impact of the fall. There were scratches on your hands as you dragged your palms over the rough gravel in an attempt to move away.

There was a malicious glint in Johnny’s eyes and his lips were curved into a devious smirk as he stared down at you, domineering and intimidating. The veins in his arms and hands were bulging angrily and as he clenched his fists, you felt your stomach sink. Your legs began to feel like jelly and your vision was beginning to blur from all the salty tears. You were struck with fear and the sense of helplessness you felt made you feel both ashamed and furious at yourself yet there was nothing you could do.

You held your hand up to shield yourself from the impending attack as the bully lifted up his fist.

“Hey! How about you pick on someone your own size?!”

The group of you turned to see Jaehyun, eyes blazing with anger as his chest heaved. His wind-swept hair hung over his eyes, a surefire sign that he’d run over and his cheeks were red from exertion. Even from afar, he was clearly no match to Johnny’s larger build, much less the whole lot of them.

“J-Jaehyun?” You spluttered, shocked.

“Who is this clown- Ow!” Johnny stumbled backwards as a rock pebble hit him on the head, promptly ricocheting off his forehead and bouncing onto the ground. His jaw was clenched in pain and when he removed his palm, a reddish bruise had blossomed and there was even a faint trace of blood. There was a split second of stunned silence before Johnny turned almost magenta with rage.

“GET HIM!” He roared and his cronies shook out of their daze, immediately going after Jaehyun who’d already ran a good distance before the reality of what had just happened set in. His mocking laugh rang through the afternoon amidst a cackle of profanities and threats yelled at him.

It was a laugh that remained in your memories all these years. It was a laugh that strengthened you, a laugh that spoke so much of willful courage and youthful rebellion which was everything you’d eventually come to associate with Jaehyun. That laugh was bright and so… him.

Yet now, you could see none of that playful mischief and vibrancy in those eyes. All that is left is emptiness.

“You’re not a loser, Jaehyun,” you began softly, “you never were in my eyes. You were a fighter.”

Those beautiful eyes you adored so much narrowed at you, his face twisted into a scowl.

“A fighter? Guess what, y/n?” He sneered, his voice dripping with venom. “I fought. I fought endlessly but did that work out for me? I threw in everything I could, every little thing. I worked hard and put in a hundred and one percent of my effort.”

You stared at him, your heart aching for him as a single tear began to roll down his cheek, tears of anger, indignation and pain.

“But did that work out? No, it didn’t. If anything, it left me a wreck. People out there call me a loser, a has-been and even my girlfriend has left me. It doesn’t matter how much effort I put in, how much I fought because at the end of the day, everyone is only here because of what they think I am. They saw me as a champion, an up and coming and the moment I wasn’t anymore, they all dropped me in a heartbeat. What are you waiting for, y/n? Why the hell are you even still here?”

His words echoed through the empty apartment and out loud, it sounded bleak, harsh and biting. His anguished voice tore at your heart and as each word left those lips, it felt like your heart was slowly breaking apart. Neither of you said anything for a moment, locked in a silent, unspoken fight as he held your gaze steadily. His eyes were cold and there was the look of a broken man in them.

“I am here because I love you, Jaehyun,” you said finally, your voice quivering. “I don’t care who or what you are and it pains me to see you tear yourself down like this because I know you are not the loser you believe you are. I don’t know how much of this I can take, seeing you ruin yourself.”

You can see the slight softening in his eyes and you gritted your teeth.

“I’m going to go. I don’t know when I’ll be back. I can’t see you ruin yourself and be able to do nothing about it. I’m not strong enough for that.”

With that, you left the apartment before he could see the tears in your eyes.

The miserable, empty can of beer clattered loudly against the hardwood floor, the sound echoing through the dank apartment.

Jaehyun barely lifted an eyebrow, his fingers growing slack without him even knowing. He stared up at the dark ceiling, a hooded look in those once bright eyes. The stench that hung around him was growing more intense by the day and it was reaching a point whereby he could almost smell himself but there was nothing in him that seemed to care.

Sounds of active civilisation outside drifted in through the windows and occasionally, he’d hear the honking of angry drivers on the roads or the laughter of children playing at the playground at the courtyard below. Normally, he loved waking up to these sounds or at least when he wasn’t off to the race tracks, when he was relaxing with a book in his hands. Now however, he found them irksome, irritating and he wanted nothing more but to block them out. He wanted absolutely zero reminder of the world outside.

Grunting, Jaehyun dragged himself off the couch. As he trudged heavily back to his room where his comfortable bed beckoned to him, he turned to stare at the large, imposing front door where moments ago, you’d slammed shut as you left him to his own devices.

Guilt tugged at his heart and for a split second, Jaehyun contemplated running after you. When you left, there was an indescribable sense of hollowness that engulfed him in a way that he couldn’t quite understand or explain. The apartment was filthy, dark and small but somehow with you around just a few minutes ago, it felt just a little bigger, a little warmer. As much as he hated to admit it, his heart was calling to him to reach out to you, run after you. The crumpled look on your face haunted him but he shook the thought from his mind.

It would be better if you left him. If you knew what was good for you, you would.

The anger in him was beginning to resurface at the thought of everything that had happened over the past few months. His career plummeting on a downward spiral right after his recovery, the exact opposite of what was predicted by his agent.

He was born to race, his family and his friends had always told him so. He knew it himself, he could feel it in his blood, his bones, his spirit. Ever since he was little, Jaehyun had known that his career would have something to do one way or another with racing. As a child, he loved running, competing but most of all, he loved riding in his father’s pickup truck on the way to school. He loved the way the vehicle would zoom past the streets, overtaking other vehicles and he loved the feeling of the wind against his face. He loved the speed and everything about cars or racing. It felt natural for him to pursue a career in competitive racing and a natural he was.

After getting signed with a racing company, Jaehyun quickly rose to fame with his numerous championships, bagging trophies, medals and cash prizes in almost every event he participated in. Sports magazines and reporters would clamour over each other to score an interview with him. People wanted pictures with him, wanted him to sign an autograph for them.

He was the golden boy in the racing world, an untouchable.

In the racing world, everything goes a mile a minute and nothing waits for anyone. After the morbid crash at the June Tokyo Prix, Jaehyun had sustained several fractures to his ribs and a severe concussion that left him in the hospital’s intensive care unit bedridden for several months. The pain was unlike any other and every single move hurt immensely but what suffered more damage than he did was his career and his relationships.

Within months, the racing career he had so painstakingly built up for himself collapsed before him. Due to long inactivity, brands and sponsors began to drop him, slowly at first then steadily one by one. He was also constantly under the media’s scrutiny for a period of time, their cameras and microphones thrusted in his face while he lay helpless on the hospital bed. The bright flashes blinded him and the loud noises made his head pound and even now, he still remembered how that experience was like, shuddering every time it crossed his mind. It had taken Jaehyun countless hours of physical therapy before he could even think of racing competitively again.

Yet when he did, he quickly realised he never could revert back to his old self, the one who got off on adrenaline kicks while zooming along the tracks at breakneck speed, the one who only knew what it was like to win. He was slower, less coordinated. His body could no longer take the pressure racing would subject it too, or at least not quickly enough for him to make a full, stunning comeback.

The tabloids and news had run wild with his fall from grace, writing up horrible, demeaning articles about him. His rivals had mocked him to his face and he could even sense the visible disappointment from his fans emanating from the stands whenever he’d lost yet another race. The thing that really broke the camel’s back however, was when his girlfriend Jeongyeon initiated a breakup.

Jaehyun had hoped that things would turn for the better, never one to give up. He’d trained tirelessly everyday, pushing his brittle body to the limit. He never let up on himself, gritting his teeth through all the physical and mental pressure he had imposed on himself. When the final text was sent, Jaehyun could remember distinctly how hopeless and distraught he’d felt. It felt like his world, the empire he had so painfully and relentlessly crafted for himself from scratch was breaking bit by bit. To add salt to the wound, the next time he’d seen her on television, her body was plastered against his biggest rival, Yuta. Her arms were wrapped around his and her lips pressing against his cheeks with no shame whatsoever for the interviewer interviewing him, no sign of the girl who’d once told him that she loved him with all her heart.

What was once determination and naive hopefulness soon devolved into anger and resentment. Jaehyun began to let himself go and the change was drastic. Where there once existed a time whereby he’d rise from his slumber early to visit the gym, he now regularly slept well into the late afternoon. His diet began to consist largely of takeout, junk food and alcohol and his apartment got more and more cluttered by the day. He’d stopped contacting his friends and family, ignoring their calls and texts, preferring to fester in his own solitude. It wasn’t long before an odour had started to emit from his place, a nauseating mixture of stale pizza, beer and pure filth from the lack of showers.

His appearance was also no longer polished, but rather haggard as if he’d aged five years in a matter of months. He was beginning to lose his fit stature, the healthy glow he’d once been prized on by magazines and gossip columns dimming. It got to a point whereby Jaehyun had begun to avoid looking at his hideous reflection in the mirror, his self-hatred growing with each day.

A poster of him in his racing gear and his race car was tattered and wrinkled on the floor, stained with ketchup and soda. Staring at it blankly with eyes empty of any emotions whatsoever, Jaehyun swiped it up and in a swift moment, he tore it up with a large rip before trashing it somewhere on the floor.

Flopping onto his comforter, he almost moaned in pleasure as he sunk into the soft sheets. Reaching for the air conditioning control, a loud smack on the ground roused him from his hedonistic haze. His hair was sticking up in all directions as he peered over the edge of his bed to see a picture frame that had fallen from his night stand.

Holding it in his hands, he looked at it with a nonchalant air.

It was a picture of the both of you a few years ago, back when he was just kick starting his racing career. He hadn’t yet made a name for himself then as the two of you leaned in for the picture.

You had on a bright, illuminating beam on your face, your eyes alive and glittering with happiness. Your hair was down, wisps of it framing your face as the sun brought out the colour and shine of it. Next to him, you’d completely dwarfed in comparison. He had his arm around you, bringing you to his side and from the picture, Jaehyun could feel a smile begin to crack on his face at the comical height difference.

He’d looked completely at ease here, carefree with the recklessness and restlessness of the soul beneath shining through his dark eyes. His hair was wavy, styled down in that ridiculous fashion he wanted so badly to leave back in high school. He had worn a dimpled smile on his face, the look of someone who knew he was destined for greatness and believed in it.

Jaehyun was about to put the picture down when something caught his eye. He leaned in closer.

There was something about you. At first glance, it would have been clear that you were smiling for the camera but upon closer look, it looked as if you might be smiling at him instead. Your smile was softer, eyes gentler from the first time he’d seen the picture. It was the sort of smile that struck him in his heart, the kind of smile that would make its recipient feel loved, appreciated.

“I want to be a racer when I grow up.”

You turned to Jaehyun, eyes wide as saucers as you popped the ice popsicle out of your mouth.

“Why?”

He shrugged, still struggling with the wrapper of the popsicle. The two of you sat on the wooden bench, side by side as the other kids ran around the park, playing rounds of tag while their parents or babysitters sat watching over them. The sun was glaring down on the earth and though it was a great day to go out to play and sweat it out, it was also a perfect day to find an excuse to buy popsicles with what little pocket money your parents had given to you two. It wasn’t an opportunity to be missed.

“I really like racing. I don’t know if there’s anything else I’d want to be,” he said simply, grinning as he finally succeeded in breaking open the plastic.

You tried to hide the blush that was beginning to creep up to your cheeks, looking away from him.

“My mom says being a doctor is good.”

As soon as you said it, you immediately regretted your words. Jaehyun scrunched up his nose in disgust.

“No way! It’s so boring. Do you want to be a doctor?”

Quickly, you shook your head fervently. “No!”

“Then what do you want to be?” He asks curiously, sucking on his popsicle.

You are quiet for a while as you ponder over his question. What exactly do you want to be when you grow up?

“...A writer.” You said finally and he swiveled around to look at you, clearly not expecting your answer.

“A writer? Hm, why?”

“I just really like reading. I want to write interesting stories that people will like,” you take a tentative lick of your popsicle, the icy, sweet taste of apple flavouring coating your tongue, “Like fairytales!”

Jaehyun broods over your answer, seemingly deep in thought. For a moment, neither of you say another word as you sit together under the warm, sunny day, enjoying your popsicles.

“I want people to like me too.” He says suddenly, his eyes shining. “People will like my racing! I’m going to be a racer and people will like me to win!”

He hops to his feet, his popsicle raised as he made his declaration. There is a triumphant, toothy smile on his face and he says it with so much hope and gusto that you can’t help but feel drawn to his driven spirit. For a boy of five foot, there was a lot of motivation and energy in him and there was just something about him that got you transfixed.

Under the sunlight, his smile seemed almost blindingly bright with the shadows highlighting the charming dimples on those round cheeks. The butterflies in your stomach were going crazy and your heart began to pound. Your words seemed stuck in your throat and you choked out, “I t-think you’ll make a good racer, J-Jaehyun.”

You thought your heart might burst as his smile grew wider, his dimples making deeper indentations. It felt like the sun might just be a little too hot since your face felt like it was positively flaming.

“Thank you, y/n.”

Suddenly, something caught your eye and shakily, you pointed at him.

His smile dropped as his eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

“What?”

“Y-your popsicle is m-m-melting… down your a-arm.”

The elevator button made an uncharacteristic squeaking sound as Jaehyun jabbed repeatedly at it, his jaw clenched in impatience.

“Hurry up, hurry up, hurry up,” he muttered frantically under his breath, pacing the lift lobby. The red letters above the elevator were moving at a snail’s pace and it seemed as if it’s stopped to pick up some passengers on the 5th floor. How long does it take for people to move into an elevator?

Jaehyun groaned in annoyance as he watched the number on the display crawl up slowly.

This wouldn’t do. By the time it’s here, it would be too late.

Immediately, he sprinted for the stairs instead, his heart hammering against his chest.

There was great fanfare as the rowdy crowd erupted into raucous cheers, the large, industrial sized party poppers going off with a bang, covering everyone in glitter streamers and confetti. Cameras were flashing and clicking away at every corner while throngs of sports reporters flooded the holding area, all trying to reach the champions for their coveted exclusive interviews. Agents and pit crews were all celebrating with the sound of champagne bottles popping and yells and cheers of congratulations ringing through the air.

Jaehyun stood at the top of the podium, shooting the cameras his trademark stunning grin as he posed with his golden trophy that looked to be about the size of his torso. The racing suit he was wearing was uncomfortably hot and he wanted nothing more than to strip from it but the adrenaline and euphoria he was experiencing far surpassed any feelings of discomfort.

This was it, the taste of success. It was everything he lived for, raced for. This was why he always trained so hard, from dawn to dusk. This was why he put his own body through all those hours of endurance training, gym and dieting. It was all for this single moment of true bliss enjoyed and savoured after the extreme thrill of racing. Here on the podium, towering above everyone else… He was truly where he needed to be, where he was born to be.

As he stepped off and the bodyguards swarmed in to escort him to his own holding room, Jaehyun couldn’t wipe the grin off his face. Yet another trophy for display on his shelf back in his apartment. He didn’t think he’d ever get sick of it, the feeling of winning but then again who would?

Reporters were attempting to accost him at all sides, all screaming out the same old questions he had grown tired of early on.

“How do you feel after winning the prix for the third year running?”

“You hit a record timing today! How did you train for the race?”

“What do you have to say to your rival, Nakamoto who came in second this year? By a mere few seconds at that!”

Jaehyun nodded and waved at a few of them, still wearing a smile on his face but there was no answer evoked from him. He’d kept up a calm and cool demeanour throughout but once he was in his holding room alone, the moment the door closed shut behind him, he let out a loud, jubilant howl.

“Fuck yes!” He roared out in happiness before collapsing onto the couch, laughing to himself as he held his trophy above him. He badly needed a shower but he couldn’t care less, not with the trophy in his hands. Under the light, the gold shone and even as a seasoned racer, the excitement and happiness from winning never grew old. In the empty room, the victory felt even more profound, the reality of claiming the championships for yet another year sinking in.

He was in the middle of celebrating and basking in his own victory, he received a text.

Jy: how’s my man doing? congratulations on the win honey ❤️

Jae: thanks babe, it feels fucking amazing. you have no idea… also i missed you so much

Jy: we should celebrate. together, alone. tonight at my place? ;) we haven’t done it in awhile, i miss your body, your kisses

Jaehyun stared at the text. He should be happy, excited to see Jeongyeon again after so long. He had been so preoccupied with training for the big race that he’d barely had any time for her. He had missed her yet now that they were finally exchanging texts again after so long apart, he didn’t seem to feel the same anticipation.

There was something about that text she sent that seemed weirdly… detached. He had imagined their first interaction in over a month to be one that warmed him up in the inside, brought him to a whole new level of euphoria even after winning but if anything, this reality paled in comparison to the scenario he had looked forward to in his mind.

Jae: yeah sure

After pressing send, he tossed his phone onto the coffee table and rested his head against the velvety cushion of the couch. Somehow, that very short exchange with Jeongyeon had dimmed his excitement and readiness to celebrate.

His phone suddenly rang, disrupting him from the reverie he’d found himself in.

“Must be Jeongyeon,” he thought to himself and for some reasons as he swiped to answer the call, he found himself reluctant to talk.

“Hello?”

“Jung Jaehyun! I was watching your race on television, congratulations for coming in first yet again! You were terrific out there.”

Y/n.

Jaehyun smiled, feeling his heart swell at your words.

“Thanks, y/n. I really appreciate it.”

“How about we meet for dinner tonight? I know of this amazing Italian place that serves the best lasagna, your favourite! My treat too to celebrate your win, how’s that?”

At the mention of lasagna, Jaehyun could feel his stomach rumbling and his mouth watering. The tangy tomato sauce, copious amounts of cheese and spiced minced beef with soft pasta… He would absolutely be down for some well-deserved lasagna after weeks of feasting on plain, watery salads. Dinner sounded like a great idea.

“Sure, I- Wait, I can’t,” he groaned, suddenly remembering his plans with Jeongyeon. Plans he didn’t even particularly look forward to.

“Why not?” You asked.

“I um…”

Fuck, why is it so hard to say it?

“I have plans with Jeongyeon tonight,” he said, ignoring the strange pang of guilt and indignation that hit him square in the chest.

“Oh! Oh, uh… That’s completely fine. Don’t worry about it, we can always have dinner some other day.”

“Really? That would be great! How does next week sound?”

“Sounds good to me!” Even on call, he could imagine you bobbing your head enthusiastically like you usually did and that brought a chuckle out of him.

“Alright, I’ll see you then y/n.”

“See you! Please rest well, you deserve it.”

“Thank you,” he replied before hanging up.

What is this warm feeling in him?

Jaehyun raced out of the apartment complex, his eyes searching his surroundings.

The sun was glaring and he couldn’t see straight without squinting his eyes. He must have been a weird sight to behold - scruffy, pale from the lack of the outdoors and reeking of the garbage piled up in his apartment. An elderly woman walking past him tutted disapprovingly at his disheveled appearance, holding her nose as she did but Jaehyun didn’t seem to notice her. His mind was on something else, something more important.

A boy from across the street was staring at him with his mouth agape, looking like a deer caught in headlights as he shakily fumbled in his pockets for his phone. Jaehyun let his sights linger on him, wondering if he should have at least thrown on a coat but as he turned, he caught sight of a figure hanging by the bus stop, looking miserable.

He swallowed thickly, feeling the slight clench of his heart and without hesitating a single second longer, he made his way over.

The heart monitor’s methodical beating was driving him near insanity. If not that, then certainly the suffocating atmosphere of the hospital and the bandages wrapped tightly around almost every single inch of his body would. Not to mention the occasional undercover paparazzi who would try to inch their way into his ward.

Jaehyun stared up at the white ceilings, still as a plank. Every part of his body hurt to move, he couldn’t even turn his head without feeling a painful pounding in it. Sometimes, he would get dizzy spells so intense he actually felt nauseous. His appetite for food or anything in general had since plummeted. Everything, but racing.

He yearned to go out there onto the tracks, to resume his training. The Roman Prix is coming up in a month’s time and he was so far from ready. He needed to get out of this place as soon as possible, even if it meant jeopardising his own safety. His career mattered more than anything.

Jeongyeon hadn’t called either since the day he got admitted. Jaehyun had soon grown tired of checking his messages or asking his publicist for news from her, the feeling of disappointment felt deep within him. He closed his eyes, suddenly feeling a wave of fatigue wash over him.

There was a gentle knock on the door and as the door creaked slightly open, you poked your head in. Upon seeing him, you smiled softly and made your way over to him. Jaehyun watched you approach, his eyes following you.

You had brought along a basket with you, seemingly full of items. As much as he wanted to know what you’d brought, he tried not to look overeager. “I made you something special today,” you said, settling down and practically vibrating with excitement.

“What?”

“Tomato minestrone soup!” You exclaimed, uncovering the lid as the tantalising aroma of tomatoes and a medley of vegetables drifted in the air. Jaehyun almost had to restrain himself from moving, lest he shift a bone out of place somewhere.

Somehow seeing you had sparked a certain kind of joy in him. Maybe it was a sign nobody had really forgotten about him yet. He had watched his number of visitors trickle down day by day and now that it was close to a month since he’d been hospitalised, after the tragic accident, he barely got any. Perhaps three or four a week if he was lucky.

You, however, you were different. You visited him almost every other day, no matter how busy you were. You visited his bedside even if you were worn out from a long day of work, even when you had things to attend to, even when no one else bothered to. You would bring along snacks whenever you did or homemade get-well food like fish porridge or chicken noodle soup you’d whipped up yourself, though they might be far from the usual gourmet fare he was used to back when he was still active when he would go for exquisite dinner parties. Usually, you stayed for a substantial amount of time and sometimes, you even stayed the night.

Jaehyun didn’t understand why you would do all of this for a friend, a friend who never seemed to have time to spare for you at that. More than anything, the feeling of guilt in him only grew stronger with each visit yet he was grateful, extremely grateful. Your presence was like a warm ray of sunshine in this dreary hospital ward. Whenever you visited, he couldn’t help but smile even though he could not find it in himself to smile. But when it came to you, it felt natural.

“Y/n!”

At the sound of Jaehyun’s voice, you turned and even from afar, he could see your reddened eyes - a surefire sign you’d been crying. Guilt and anger washed over him in waves and he tried not to think how many times he had been the cause of your tears. If only he could turn back time, he would have shook himself for ever dismissing you so lightly like he did, before he saw the situation for what it was.

He was blinded. Blinded by his obsession for winning, fame, glory and pleasing the wrong people. In a way, it felt like a fog had been lifted before him and now that he could see, think, feel clearly… He wasn’t going to let the right person out of his grasp. The person who loved him unconditionally, not just for his fame and achievements. The person who stuck with him through thick and thin but he was just too daft to notice it. The person who always felt like home whether he knew it or not.

You.

“Jaehyun? W-What are you…” You spluttered, desperately trying to wipe your tears from your face as you stared up at him.

It took a couple of seconds for him to regain his breath, his face turning red from embarrassment and exertion. He should really start leaving those beers and junk food alone.

“I…” He panted, both out of fatigue and relief, “We need to talk.”

“Jung is getting closer, any minute now Hendery!”

“I don’t believe this! Are we looking at a potential comeback for this prix? Push, push, push!”

“It seems like we might be! Here he comes! He is absolutely mad!”

The nascars zipped along the race tracks, smoke and some bits of burnt rubber and chipped metal trailing along its wake. They were a blur of colours to the spectators, who were practically glued to their seats as they watched the race reach its climax. A massive telescreen was displaying close ups and the ranking board with huge overhead lights that illuminated the stadium. The crowd was growing wilder by the second as the racecars zoomed past them, their attention fixed on one racer in particular.

The sleek nascar was streaked in royal blue and crimson red over a metallic black base, looking almost purple and black with how fast it was flying across the tracks. The wheels were spinning so fast that the friction between the tough rubber tire and the rough granite almost lit up the tracks. It was charging forward with a steely determination and ruthlessness, closing in rapidly on a green and white nascar ahead of it.

The adrenaline coursing Jaehyun’s veins was unlike any other. The thrill he got from racing could practically send him into an all time high and a cunning grin tugged at his lips as he stepped his foot down hard on the pedal, his hands gripping tightly onto his steering wheel. Rounding around a bend, he clenched his jaw as he pushed his body weight to the left, the muscles in his abdominals and biceps flexing and straining against his racing suit as the car drifted across the tracks in a perfect arc.

“Did you see that perfectly executed drift?! Insanity!”

“Jung is absolutely on fire!”

The thunderous cheers of the crowd and the loud hum of the race cars racing across the tracks faded into the background as he kept his eyes trained steadily forward. Any time now…

“Watch out, Nakamoto,” he whispered under his breath.

Steering his wheel sharply and accelerating much to the crowd’s excitement and trepidation, his race car was now driving side by side along Yuta’s. For a split second, the two turned to look at each other through the window and even though there was no way of seeing the other’s face through that helmet, something in Jaehyun told him that his rival was angered, shocked and… Fearful.

Jaehyun grinned beneath his helmet and without a second thought, he zipped forward, leaving Yuta behind in the smoke.

“He’s going for it, he’s going for it… Wait for it… And he crosses the line! The legend has reclaimed his spot on the top!”

“And that is how you execute one of the greatest comebacks of all time, ladies and gentlemen. Jung has done what we believed to be impossible and dominated the race! I wonder how Nakamoto feels about that?”

The other commentator chuckles into his microphone.

“Well Haechan, if I were him, I’d be pissed off for sure! But I’d also be worried… So very worried.”

The crowd was absolutely wild when he’d disembarked from the car and as he removed his helmet, he was greeted with camera flashes all around him. He shook his head, running a gloved hand over his hair and he took a deep breath. The air smelled of burnt rubber, smoke and… Success.

He had done it. He had made his comeback.

His pit crew made a beeline for him, slapping him on the back, their faces jubilant and lit with pure joy. His new manager, one that he trusted and helped him inch his way back to the top step by step, shot him a thumbs up which he nodded in acknowledgement as the crowd of sports journalists, reporters and photographers began to swarm in on him.

Yet, he paid them no attention. If this was three years ago, he would have basked in the glory, the attention but now he had greater concerns on his mind. His heart was pounding now for a different reason altogether and he could feel his hands growing clammy.

Jaehyun craned his neck and searched the rowdy media crowd. Where were you?

“Jaehyun!”

At your voice, he turned and immediately almost stumbled backwards as you crashed into him for a hug. The feelings of you against him sparked a joy in his heart, a joy almost greater than winning. He enveloped you in a hug, holding your waist as he nuzzled his face into your hair. Your scent of honey and jasmine was intoxicating, alluring and a welcomed change from the smell of smoke and rubble.

The two of you had been dating for about two years now, each day together better than the previous. After he’d caught up with you that day, it was as if you were seeing a different Jaehyun from the one you’d seen in his apartment. That Jaehyun who had caught up with you at the bus stop was the old Jaehyun you’d missed and it was as if a switch somewhere had been flipped. To this day, he had never admitted what changed while you were gone for those few minutes. He had subsequently apologised for everything he’d done, even things you didn’t see a problem with. It was shocking to say the least to see the unapologetic Jaehyun apologise for anything at all, but not more shocking than what entailed a few days later.

It started with a vase of luscious red roses being sent to your workplace followed by an invitation for dinner. Before you knew it, the boy you’d loved almost all your life was courting you with a passion. It felt like a complete dream, so much so you had been afraid to wake up suddenly and realise it was all just your imagination. He’d been more of a romantic than he’d let on and many times, you had found yourself completely smitten by his stunts that stretched from learning how to make homemade chocolates for you on Valentine’s Day knowing that you liked them, even though he was well known as a terrible cook to sending flowers up to your doorstep every other week.

Within a couple of months, the two of you were dating and deeply, wildly in love.

Amidst date nights filled with laughter and kisses, he had also been steadily climbing his way back up the ranks of the racing world. After ditching his unhealthy lifestyle he had been living for the past year, the change was apparent. He’d started hitting the gym, eating healthier and before long, he was in prime condition to start racing again. Training was long and tough but he never did give up. He was more determined and driven than you’d seen him and though the old Jaehyun would have been gutted at a loss, this new, better version of him never fussed over a loss of any kind, instead learning from his mistakes.

All of his efforts had led to this ultimate moment, the taste of victory on his lips.

You noticed he had been shifting uncomfortably and you looked up, puzzled and concerned.

“Jaehyun? You okay?”

He looked at you, his ears red, a sign that he was anxious, nervous.

“Jaehyun? What-”

Your words got stuck in your throat as he knelt down on one knee, the lights overhead bringing out the sparkle in his eyes and the shine in his hair. Those dark orbs were so full of hope, anxiety and love all intermingled in one and you found it difficult to believe that those eyes were looking at you directly, the emotions in them all for you.

Jaehyun withdrew a tiny, velvet box from his pocket and popped it open. In the box, was a tiny diamond ring, glittering and absolutely regal. The diamond itself was beautifully cut and interwoven into the metal band with microfibres of white gold and it simply shone as the camera flashes went off. The crowd was going bonkers, screaming and cheering with wolf whistles.

“Y/n,” he spoke softly, his voice gentle. “You have always been there for me, always been my better half. We have been friends for over a decade and lovers for merely two but it seemed as if we always were meant for each other. It took me so long to realise that and there is not a day I don’t regret not realising it sooner. You are my everything - my past, present and future. Falling in love with you was gradual, unconscious. I guess my heart knew you the one before I even did. It started with me being in a dark, dark place where I drowned in my own self-hatred and insecurities. I was beaten, defeated and I just gave up. Where everyone did the same, you never did. You were like a beam of shining light, shining upon me and guiding me even if I didn’t notice it at the time. But when I did, you glowed even more brightly than I’d envisioned. I’d been oblivious to your beauty both inside and outside for far too long and god knows how much I fucking regret it. I’m different now though, because of you. I am the best version of myself right now because I have you in my life. You taught me how to love, allow myself to be loved. There’s no universe whereby I’d want to be without you. I can’t see myself without you in my life. I need you, I love you.”

Tears were beginning to stream down your face and the stadium had grown quieter, all tuning into what was happening.

Jaehyun looked up at you, hopeful and so full of love that you thought your heart might burst.

“So I guess what I’m saying is, will you marry me, y/n?” He asked breathlessly.

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mrs-march-ahs · 3 years

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American Horror Story Hunger Games

This is an idea I’ve had for absolutely months. I needed to set it free.

Summary- Ever wonder what would’ve happened if 24 of the most brutal characters on the show were put together, in a life or death arena?

This is how I believe this would play out.

Enjoy, tell me what you think :)

1. Richard Ramirez (1984) – Savage and persistent, but easily frustrated. He wasn’t able to get Brooke or Mr Jingles. Has soft spots and can be somewhat toyed with and puppeteered. He’s young, and has weaknesses and cracks in his personality.

2. Dandy Mott (Freak Show) -A literal savage. Killed his own mother and played with her dead body. Doesn’t like when things don’t go his way. If somebody managed to escape him, he would need hours to recover. He’s very emotional and that could be his biggest weakness. Wouldn’t be very sneaky or secretive. Would get bored of the hunger games very very easily and would want out. But he would never suicide, he would just complain.

3. Kai Anderson (Cult) – So manipulative. Convince people to kill each other. Convince people to make Dandy crazy and weak. Make false teams and alliances. Convince people he’s the worthy one and people should sacrifice. A lot of less strong personalities could end up being his little puppets. Larry (13) and Sally (16) need to be told what to do, and he would tell them. If he made it far enough, he would be able to outsmart and kill both of them.

4. James Patrick March (Hotel) -Has plenty of experience. Get along with Arden. If we’re killing, let’s make it fun and explore. Wouldn’t be as much about winning as it would be about the game for him, completely opposite to Kai. James would want to make the experience exciting and mutilate people. He’s somewhat a lone wolf though and would struggle making alliances unless others reached out. The Countess is a big weakness.

5. Margaret Booth (1984) -Killed a whole camp because she was making fun of her. Convincingly blamed it on Jingles. Cut off ears with no hesitation just to fit the story. Kind of creative. She would get far, because people would underestimate her. Nobody would think she was a threat, but she would be very quietly cutting people off and blaming it on others. She would also tell people lies all the time, like “Be careful of March, I just saw him kill Piggy Man” when it was actually her.

6. Tate Langdon (Murder House) -Good at justifying his own actions. Very sensitive and would spend the first half an hour crying. He wouldn’t have a weapon at first and he would sit and cry about it in a tree. Would try to save somebody from Michael though. He would get along very well with Sally, but Kai would see him as a lose end and wouldn’t even try to kill him. Kai sees Tate as such little of a threat that he’s not enough worth his time killing, because somebody else will inevitably kill him, or he’ll get sad and kill himself. Tate would hide out most of the time before he started getting mad and killing people off. But he would only do that if he had a gun, as he’d be a bit cautious if he thought others may have weapons. Likes jumping out of camouflage and scaring people.

7. The Butchess (Roanoke) -Goes on savage rampages and can’t be stopped.

8. Twisty (Freak Show) -Doesn’t have the psychopathic motivation. Desperate for attention in a way. The way he kills is very theatrical and that could be a big weakness. Secretly very emotional, and would be in two different personas. During the day, he would hide out and think of plans, trying to not get too overwhelmed by his own emotions, and then during the night he would become Twisty and kill people. He would be very protective of younger people or those who he classed as vulnerable. He’d help them hide out and protect them, promising them that when their time comes, he’ll go easy on them and they’ll die peacefully.

9. Bloody Face (Asylum) -Him and Arden could work together, but Bloody Face would be slightly scared of Arden. He does still have soft spots. Mommy issues. He would get frustrated sort of easily and want to do things his way, having the bodies for a certain amount of time, etc. But his attention to detail and desperate need for warm touch would get him killed. If he were to work with somebody, he would prefer to be guided.

10. Dr Arthur Arden (Asylum) -Would be able to convince JPM to experiment. They would both be fascinated by Franken Kyle, but they would both want to go after weaker women first. Dr Arden would suggest The Countess and James would stab him on the spot.

11. Franken Kyle (Coven) – Damaged, but full of rage and anger. Just so angry. Obviously, not only does Kyle need guiding and being told what to do, but Kyle definitely needs protecting. Kyle would struggle to find a warm place to sleep and food to eat. If he had somebody (like Sally or Mary Eunice) to take care of him in those ways, he has the potential to be a murdering machine. But if he were left by himself, he would venture too far away from the middle. He would get upset and frustrated trying to find a warm shelter to sleep in and he would freeze to death in the pouring rain in the night, crying himself to death. :(

12. Charles Montgomery (Murder House) -Made the Infantata. Clearly mental. But he wasn’t so much of a cold-blooded murderer as he was fascinated by anatomy. He’d want to make in interesting, and that would kill him off. He would waste so much time with dead bodies.

13. Larry (Murder House) -Kai’s servant. Incredibly loyal, he killed for Constance because he’s in love. His weakness would be trying to be too efficient. He wouldn’t want to do actual dirty work by himself, he would try to set up traps or set fire to people, maybe even poison them. Things would take too long and he wouldn’t be secretive enough. He would either be killed in self defence by a potential victim or Kai would kill him for taking too long.

14. Piggy Man (Roanoke) -Will disappear if you say Croatoan. Weakling.

15. Marie Laveau (Coven) -Put Kathy in a cage and buried her alive. Clearly not only has the rage and anger inside of her, but also able to act on her darkest thoughts. Too sympathetic however, which would be a weakness. She would easily sympathise with whoever told her the right story. She would become maternal over Franken Kyle, Tate, or Michael. One of the people who she took good care of would back stab her.

16. Hypodermic Sally (Hotel) -Does have a high death count. So sensitive and emotional. Her and Tate would get along. Similarly to Tate, she would go on hard rampages for a while and then need time to recharge. Her need for attention and human affection would absolutely kill her. She would constantly approach people and try to make alliances, but be so annoying and look so untrustworthy that people would kill her.

17. John Lowe (Hotel) -Got the anger inside of him because of Holden. But does need guidance. James would guide him, and he would do what he was told. He’s a very solid contender, and apart from needing guidance the only thing that would kill him is his own fatigue. Unlike some of the hardcore murderers, he wouldn’t be able to keep going constantly. He would need time to unwind and might do that with Sally, before killing her. He could make it all the way, but he wouldn’t because he’s exhausted and drained. Might kill himself, but probably will get killed while killing somebody else.

18. Ally Mayfair-Richards (Cult) -Did kill her own wife. But definitely needs strong motivation. Winter deserved to die just as much as Ivy but Ally wasn’t able to do it. Would need somebody to do some of the dirty work for her. Obviously if she was in the hunger games before her villainy arch, she would die immediately. She would submit to anybody she needed to just to survive for the sake of surviving.

19. Michael Langdon (Apocalypse) -Literally the antichrist. But wants guidance. Seeks approval in the same way Bloody Face does. He has the potential to win as long as he didn’t talk to anybody or listen to anything anybody said. The second he got too far in the game and started to try and play mind games and make alliances is when he would lose. The plan that worked for him was if you see somebody, follow them, kill them. He’s strong and cunning and that could’ve let him win.

20. Mr Jingles (1984) -Too soft. Would only be motivated by his family and need to survive for them. Surprisingly enough, he would completely refuse to work with anybody. He would always think that he wasn’t in here to make friends but to survive, and getting to know people would complicate things too much. He would be killed when he’d be asleep in his own hiding place.

21. The Countess (Hotel) -Only kills if she’s betrayed. Would and could manipulate James, getting him to kill for her. She would eventually die, potentially at the hands of John. The Hunger Games is what James would need to realise how much she didn’t love him, and that her living isn’t worth it. She would assume she could win because she’s a vampire and she wont die of natural causes like Franken Kyle would, but not knowing her own weakness is her biggest weakness, and ultimately cause of death.

22. Mary Eunice (Asylum) -Pre-possessed would die first because she’s a little bitch. After, would kill a lot of people and could manipulate Arden the same way The Countess does James. In fact, she would partner up with The Countess and together they would hunt people out. But when Arden and James kill The Countess, she joined their team fully.

23. Queenie (Coven) -Super powerful. Can kill without even getting close. But her weakness is how not sneaky she is. She would struggle to do all the survival things. Get food, find a place to sleep, climb trees or hide from people. But once she had one weapon, that’s pretty much all she needs. If somebody approaches her, she’d stab herself and kill them. She’d die being stabbed repeatedly in her sleep by Kai.

24. Robot Mair Mead (Apocalypse) -Needs obvious instructions, and when Michael died, she died with him. When she died, James and Arden would be fascinated by the way she works (since it’s not from their time) and try to make a robot Kyle since he’s useless not being a robot. They would take his dead body and dismembered Robot Mead parts and create the ultimate fighting champion, Robot Franken Kyle. Arden would kill Mary Eunice, allowing the Devil to enter Robot Franken Kyle, creating Demon Robot Franken Kyle. Unstoppable. The ultimate winner, after he goes ballistic and kills his creators, Arden and James, then anybody who’s left.

OVERALL WINNERS BELOW GIF

6. James March. An experienced murderer. 5. Dr Arthur Arden. A brutal masochist. 4. Margaret Booth. A determined fighter. 3. Kai Anderson. An evil leader. 2. Michael Langdon. A possessed killer. 1. Kyle Spencer. Demon Robot Franken Kyle.

━━━━━━♡♤♡━━━━━━

@milly-louise @kitwalker02 @tatestripedsweater @therenlover @maria-akira @tatesimper @sallyscigarettes @mossybank @ahsxual @mxlti-fand0m-imaginess @mrs-march-ahs-biggest-fan @kitwalkerangel @kitsommers @blackbat2020 @whiiiiplaaaaash @elaineygrace @divinerulerluvr @johndeaconshands @midnightstar-90 @xmaximoffic @tatesweaterweather @undeadcortez @slightlyvicked @americxn @kaislittleheadliner @imjimmysdarling @kaiandersonluvr @fictional-men-that-i-stan @quickiesgirl

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ruby-whistler · 3 years

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the difference between static and dynamic characters on the dream smp

Hi, hello, it's Ruby, back with another PSA because this fandom (specifically the people on Twitter) keeps getting worse.

/dsmp /rp

Recently, people started claiming c!Techno was boring because he never had any character development.

Now, this may come as a surprise to some of you, but if you in any capacity decide to study the ins and outs of creative writing, you'd learn that characters don't need to have character development to be compelling, loved by the audience, and have a complex personality.

This is what is called a static character. Not to be confused with flat characters. What's the difference?

Most articles seem to agree on this;

"Static characters should not be confused or mixed up with flat, one-dimensional characters. Though neither changes as the story progresses, if a character remains unchanged, it does not mean that he is one-dimensional like a flat character. A static character can be perfectly interesting, like Sherlock Holmes, who is completely ingenious, eccentric, and sometimes jerky. He never changes, but the audience still loves him. Thus, a static character could be the protagonist too, and a flat character, on the other hand, only plays a side role in the story." - ( link to definition )

Static characters are ones that don't experience any personal growth during the span of the story. They're often used in writing, because they're realistic and can be interesting if well-written. This article provides examples such as the aforementioned Sherlock Holmes, Captain America from The Avengers, and TommyInnit from the Drea- [gunshots]

But in all seriousness, c!Tommy is very easily a static character; a lot of the criticism of his character is about the fact that he doesn't change. He does gain experience and new relationships, he does suffer and becomes more and more traumatized, he does make choices out of impulse or emotion, but none of that is character development - he never overcomes his character flaws, including selfishness, stubbornness, and a lack of compassion or empathy for others. And I do not blame him for it as a person, and I do not consider him a badly-written character, even if he's a little frustrating to watch sometimes.

c!Tommy has two main reasons why he remains a static character.

a) he doesn't live in a constructive environment

It is normal for boys Tommy's age to be low on empathy. It's completely normal for them to be chaotic, immature pricks, because that is part of their growth. All of this would be just fine if c!Tommy was growing up in a highschool; however, he in actuality grew up on a land ruled by politics, wars and conflict.

I do not like using the age excuse, because I do not believe it makes his bad choices any more justified, but it's easy to realize why him being in such a position could stunt his personal growth.

At that age, you need guidance, whether it be from teachers, parents, or whatever other figures you're able to find around you. Usually, it is not difficult to find good people to look up to in today's world, but for c!Tommy, that isn't true.

In the pre-L'Manberg, post-Tommy era, there was moderate peace. Yes, there were conflicts, but none of them were damaging in the long term for anyone involved, and they were chaotic scuffles more than fights of ideals.

Once c!Wilbur came along, c!Tommy latched onto him. We all know how that went.

None of the adults Tommy had looked up to were in any capacity helpful to him growing or becoming a better person. He helped lead a revolution to help Wilbur gain power, he was lead to help Wilbur lead and unfair election, and witnessed the breakdown of the man he trusted shortly after. He was subjected to emotional manipulation by Dream, and then came to the wrong person for help. None of these things are reasons for positive change.

b) it's his major character flaw

Even in the few chances he had at genuine change, at forgiveness, at letting go, all provided by the environment or people around him, he didn't take them. Tommy doesn't like change, he fights it, and that is why he always loses. He doesn't want to change for the better, and he despises himself when he changes for the worse.

He looks for peace in a lack of activity, growth, or development. He searches for happiness in not letting go of the past, but hanging onto it for dear life, terrified that the people around him might change because he doesn't want to. And that is why, as long as he keeps this mindset, he'll never find it.

While other characters, such as Tubbo, Dream, Wilbur or Quackity seek to change the world around them, for the better or the worse, to rewind or to progress, and are willing to change themselves accordingly, Tommy does the opposite, because his biggest fear is people drifting apart and leaving him behind.

Let's get back to the point, then; what makes Technoblade a static character, and a good one at that?

His motivation is simple; he is a lawful character who sticks to his morals through thick and thin, follows a strict inner code, and is loyal to people above all.

On top of that, he is given no reason to change his morals.

No one's arguments against c!Techno have ever made much sense, let's be honest, and ever since he'd entered the server, Techno's been proven right over and over and over again.

He saw Wilbur face the consequences of having power over other people and then losing it, seeing the influence of corruption on the man he worked with. He was forced by the government to kill another person, to kill an ally, to kill an innocent. He was betrayed and used by the Pogtopian revolution, which knowingly kept things from Techno and fought to seize power, rather than destroy it. He was unfairly executed without a trial by corrupt politicians just absolutely demolishing the Geneva convention, holy crap people call Techno a war criminal, just in that one stream New L'Manberg commited so many war crimes-

Point stands that people say one thing and then do the other. Talk of freedom and then force people to do things (and no, forcing people not to force other people to do things doesn't count nor does it make Techno a hypocrite, get a better argument). Techno was never manipulated or swayed to someone's side against his ideals because he's not a man of words; he believes in what he sees, not what people tell him, especially since he's been repeatedly lied to.

That is the first thing a good static character needs; a strong motivation. Through everything that's happened, I'd say without a doubt that Technoblade has the strongest motivation out of everyone, which is to emancipate people from the tyranny of their rulers - not just sing about it and then establish a dictatorship - but to in fact do it, no matter the cost.

He's a very Paragon-type character, which is a common type of static; his moral code is too strong to allow emotional change.

Another thing a static character needs is personality. And Techno - if you watch his streams, not just others' perspectives - has a lot of that. From his bond with Phil and Ranboo to fondness of animals to sense of humour, the character is entertaining to watch and follow. You know what to expect of him, you know he won't betray, and that despite the flaws he has he will not let personal issues hold him back. He wins because he trains, and he puts hours into pulling crazy stunts, and he's persistent - it's satisfying for the people watching his perspective to see his efforts pay off.

His interactions with others are characterized by an attempt at kindness, no matter how many times he might fail at separating his personal life from the ideals he's pursuing.

And that is compelling! To draw parallels to Tommy again, the kid has so much personality that other characters could borrow from him and he'd still be fun to watch!

Neither Tommy nor Techno are flat characters, and I think that is the mistake a lot of people make when misinterpreting both the characters; Tommy and Techno are amazing examples of great static characters in fiction, and I'd like to applaud cc!Tommy and cc!Techno for being brilliant writers.

#dream smp #c!techno #c!tommy #dsmp analysis #c!techno analysis #c!tommy analysis #tommyinnit #technoblade #writing #dsmp fandom critical #long post under cut

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blockgamepirate · 3 years

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Technoblade’s purpose in the political narrative of the Dream SMP

I can’t sleep so I decided to finally write the post I’ve been struggling with for literal months, except way more casual because I can’t be bothered anymore and also I’m sleep deprived.

So the thing is: to me the DSMP storyline has always been primarily political, probably because I was introduced to it through Wilbur who was definitely going for political, and also because I’m just generally interested in political narratives right now. Obviously I appreciate the character work and the personal relationship stuff, that’s what makes it more interesting than just dry allegory, but when it comes down to it, this story is about politics to me. So that’s the angle I’m going to approach it from.

Also not to spoil the conclusions here, but I’m an anarchist, that’s my lens.

(Obviously all of this is about rp from here on out unless otherwise specified)

Basically the situation as Techno joins the server is this: L'Manburg exists as an autonomous nation and is de facto independent although not officially recognised by the Dream SMP. The self-appointed president Wilbur Soot decides to hold an election and rig it in order to consolidate his power over the nation he founded and he gets his VP Tommyinnit to join in on the plan. Their scheme fails and they end up voted out instead. The new president, Schlatt, immediately establishes himself as an authoritarian figure and exiles Wilbur and Tommy.

A couple of points on what the election arc demonstrates:

1: the appearance of democracy can be used for distinctly undemocratic purposes.

2: even if the elections aren’t rigged, the electoral system could be massively flawed and end up favouring a party that in fact didn’t have the popular vote

3: even if the winning government (the coalition in this case) has the majority vote, that doesn’t guarantee that they’ll actually act according to the popular will.

4: the supporters of the losing parties basically just have to let the majority overrule their wishes, espcially since apparently L’Manburg doesn’t have an established role for an opposition, yikes. That’s actually a MAJOR oversight in the system but I’m not gonna go into that too much.

5: frankly as an anarchist I am just deeply cynical towards representative democracy, and just because you have a token appearance of choice and consent doesn’t mean that it isn’t a hierarchical and authoritarian system. And to be fair, from my point of view this applies even to so-called liberal democracies and progressive parties. Full disclosure: even if L'Manburg was the ideal example of a representative democracy (which it very much isn’t) I would still be opposed to it because I fundamentally do not believe in top down systems, even electoral ones.

6: despite all these flaws, all the characters seem to implicitly accept the electoral system as legitimate. There’s criticism against the actions of individual characters acting within the system, such as Quackity calling out Wilbur for trying to rig the election, but nobody is questioning the system itself.

So at this point I’m sitting there, watching all this go down, and thinking “man, this would be so much more bearable if there was an anarchist point of view being represented in the story.”

And hey, look who IMMEDIATELY SHOWS UP.

Okay, I’m not gonna lie, early installation Technoblade is not the best representation of anarchism. I was mostly rooting for him out of sheer contrarianism initially. I didn’t really even care if it would be another Killmonger/Magneto/Zaheer situation because I’m used to reading against the authorial intent when it comes to these things. Sometimes any representation is better than no representation, even with political ideologies. That’s not to say that him just straight up spouting this hobbesian notion of a “dog-eat-dog world” didn’t grate on me, obviously it did.

That kind of worldview of humanity needing authority in order to prevent chaos and conflict is literally antithetical to anarchism and is the favourite talking point of authoritarians, the least anarchist people there are. It’s literally what people use to argue AGAINST anarchism. I think it’s mostly because cc!Techno obviously wasn’t particularly educated on anarchist thought and was just basically having fun roleplaying with his friends at this point. Which is frustrating but fair enough I guess.

Cynical ideas about human nature are pretty deeply rooted in the mainstream, unfortunately, most people just consider it common sense. And like I said, it’s a huge talking point in the propaganda against anarchism.

(… even though in fact these arguments were originally used against proponents of representative democracy. Hobbes himself was very much a monarchist, the idea of letting normal people vote for their representatives would have been terrifying to him. Like surely the world would descent into a free-for-all war, all against all. Imagine letting commoners have OPINIONS, the horror.)

So yeah, that stuff was pretty ehhhhh. It was basically what I’d expected though: cc!Techno isn’t an anarchist and we just don’t get accurate representation from non-anarchists, ever. What I dared to hope was that Techno’s character would at least stay consistent about his opposition to ALL governments. I was pretty sure that he would, even though it seemed like the majority of the fandom at the time was convinced that he would switch over to Schlatt’s side or something. It would have been a really shitty twist, I would have ragequit immediately. I mean what would have been the entire point of his character then? He might as well have been a random mercenary. Why even have his character be an anarchist if you were just going to make him work for a government?

(ftr this is kinda my biggest problem with the Hypixel Skyblock revolution event lol, honestly I think that was a worse depiction of anarchism than early DSMP Technoblade. I mean the speech was good, but… still became a government official, tho. booooooooo, cringe)

And yes, I was rooting against L'Manburg, obviously, and I would have even if it had meant having to deal with another badly written anarchist villain character. I never understood why people saw L'Manburg as the good guys, they were nationalist and exclusionary and their whole existence was based on trying to scam people for money.

I mean they were definitely funny, they were great entertainers. I have no problems with people rooting for them because they’re fun to watch; I did that for a bit too. But people were starting to get really into the story and talk about Wilbur and Tommy, the corrupt politicians, and the country that literally excluded people based on nationality as the heroes, unironically, which was wild to me. And when Wilbur started his “villain arc” well: people called it a villain arc, as if he hadn’t been pretty much a bad guy from the beginning, constantly just out for money and power and taking advantage of the people around him and then pretending to be the victim when challenged. I mean yes he got worse, but I wouldn’t call it a villain arc, more like just a mental breakdown arc.

More importantly, to me L'Manburg represented so many things I hate about the status quo in real life, and seeing the fandom mostly unquestioningly accept it as good just pissed me off. Still pisses me off tbh. I mean, to be diplomatic I could say that I understand the emotional attachment and the way L'Manburg was built up mirrors a lot of how real nations are built and how they create a sense of patriotism out of symbols and a sense of honour and loyalty, and it’s actually really fascinating how it even works in a Minecraft roleplay. Says something about the human mind I guess. Doesn’t mean I have to like it though.

Anyway, I just wanted to see literally any kind of opposition to power, even if it had to come from a character that was unquestionably a villain, which I fully assumed Techno would be. Because political narratives so often just leave us out, or at best barely mention us. And even from a narrative point of view, adding an anarchist perspective to a political story just objectively broadens its scope and actually challenges people who are used to only arguing along the lines of conservative or liberal, welfare state or privatization, nationalism or multiculturalism, etc. Even if the original work dealt with it poorly, at least it would give me the excuse to rant about it on Tumblr, which is kinda why I revived my old Minecraft sideblog for this. (That and pig!Techno fanart.)

Also how can you have a story so fundamentally about power without its counterpoint: the rejection of power?

(Yes, Dream SMP as a whole is definitely a narrative about power, it’s a huge theme for Wilbur, Quackity, Dream, Eret and the Badlanders at least, as well as obviously the anarchist characters from the opposite direction.)

So yeah, the build up to November 16th for me was mainly about the anticipation for what Techno would do, how would Techno’s character respond to the seemingly inevitable formation of a new government. THAT was the point of interest for me, that was what I was the most invested in. Would we get an actual anarchist opposition as a new side to the conflict or would they just awkwardly drop that whole angle? Or even have him team up with Schlatt like a complete sellout? There was so much potential but I worried they might just waste it.

And I was right to worry since apparently in the original script Techno wasn’t supposed to do anything, he was just there to help fight Schlatt and witness the explosion along with everyone else.

And WOW that would have been so incredibly boring

Not even just from the political perspective, just talking about the narrative in general terms here: imagine November 16th without Techno’s plot points. Not only would it have been boring for Techno’s character but it would have been equally boring for basically everybody but Wilbur and Philza. An anticlimactic fight followed by a big explosion that pretty much everybody had seen coming already. Yes, the button room scene is dramatic and heartbreaking… for Wilbur and Phil. But nobody else was there to see it. For everybody else, it was just a big explosion. It would have been such a huge disservice to anyone watching the other POVs.

Techno’s intervention gave everyone an ACTUAL climactic fight, it allowed characters other than Wil and Phil to witness some actual drama happening and to participate in it, rather than just waiting around for the explosion, while also foreshadowing the explosion. Even better, it provoked SO MUCH discussion in the fandom AND gave a perfect hook for future conflicts to arise. Wilbur’s end was tragic but it was, at the time, final. L'Manburg would have still suffered a catastrophe but it would have been left with just the same exact antagonist as before: Dream.

And at this point Dream’s core goals had barely changed, just his approach was now different. Yes, that makes a difference for the plot, but it doesn’t really change much in terms of ideological conflict. Especially since there really isn’t that big of an ideological difference between Dream and Tommy, because arguably neither of them are particularly big on ideology in the first place, they just have conflicting goals and use different tactics to achieve those goals (well, the tactics aren’t always even that different *cough Spirit cough*).

Techno’s conflict with Tubbo and especially Quackity (and honestly most of the other characters in general) brings in so much more depth to the story, just by introducing another angle, not to even mention how much it brings to focus questions about power and violence. These are themes that exist in other characters’s storylines too but nowhere in the same way or as central as with Techno.

I’m getting kind of ahead of myself here, though.

The real twist of November 16th was the fact that Techno WASN’T a straight up villain, actually. It was a twist to me anyway, because with all my cynicism I just didn’t see it coming, I didn’t expect him to actually start making reasonable criticisms. I didn’t expect him to drop the hobbesian arguments entirely and start making points that actually sounded like anarchism.

I have to assume that cc!Techno must have seen some of the criticisms of his character and been inspired to adjust because the difference is pretty notable.

(Sidenote: I’m just forever kinda sad that Techno’s “I may seem like the villain here” monologue was cut from the video and most people never heard it.)

And I felt SO validated by the way, because it works so well in the story! Everyone is mostly content with the restoration of a status quo of some sort, Schlatt is gone, this is supposed to be the good ending, and then Techno calls them all out and turns the narrative around completely: This was just a coup d'état. This was just the previous political leadership retaking power by force. Why is everyone celebrating the same exact system that lead to Schlatt’s authoritarian rule in the first place?

What he does there is force the audience to question the narrative they’ve been presented so far, that they’ve accepted without a thought. It might not convince them, but they can’t just ignore it either.

Whatever you wanna say about the discourse around Techno on that day, in the ideological narrative THIS IS THE IMPORTANT PART. Not who betrayed who or when is political violence justified, that’s about personal relationships and morality and it’s mostly all more relevant to the aftermath than the event itself. In my opinion, the REAL point in the moment is that the characters and the audience were comfortable with the ending only to be presented with a completely new perspective on the events.

It also recontextualises the finale, including Wilbur’s actions! It’s a much more ambiguous end to the Pogtopia vs Manburg arc and to Wilbur’s original run as the head writer. Wilbur’s “even with Tubbo in charge I don’t think [that ‘special place’] can exist again” is vague enough to be dismissed as just part of his paranoia and internal conflict, but with Techno, there’s a concrete question: what if Tubbo, given the same powers as Schlatt, will turn out to be just a new Schlatt? And suddenly you have to wonder what Wilbur meant by his words too. And was all this foreshadowing something about L’Manburg’s future?

Okay I’ve only made it to November 16th and there’s so much more DSMP to talk about but the post is getting too long and I’m starting to lose my energy. Will I ever make a part two? No idea. But I’ll try.

Standard disclaimer: I’m not the spokesperson of anarchism, other anarchists might disagree with my reading

#technoblade #bladeblr #dream smp #dreamsmp #dsmp #l'manburg critical #c!wilbur soot critical #for courtesy tags #anarchy pog

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charlie-rulerofhell · 3 years

Text

For they know exactly what they do

Today there was a pretty long article published in the German newspaper FAZ, written by Julia Schaaf. Since there were quite a few interesting topics raised in it and Måneskin talked about some new aspects (or in more detail), I translated the whole thing (it might also have helped me to procrastinate).

Full interview in English under the cut.

For they know exactly what they do

June 22, 2021

Four young rock musicians from Rome are today's hottest band. Måneskin are enchanting Europe. Why? We met them for an interview.

Every romance needs its founding myth, an anecdote from the beginning, something you can tell later in more difficult times for self-assurance.

In the case of the band Måneskin, who first had Italy and now half of Europe wrapped around their fingers, and who are now trying to conquer the rest of the world with their rock music, there is the story of the shoe box. Rome, around five years ago: Four teenagers who are meeting every day after school in their rehearsal room to make music together, and sometimes they play their songs on the Via del Corso in the city centre in front of a changing audience. One day they want to record their own stuff. They find a studio that they can actually afford and as they go there they bring a shoe box, with the name of the band written on it, 'moonshine' in Danish, the bassist's mother is Danish. In the box: around seven kilogram of coins. The things you get from playing music on the streets. Everyone searching through Instagram for photos from that time can find four hippies with children's faces, three boys in batik, the girl is wearing a straw hat.

As they have to pay [for the recording], frontman Damiano David, 22, says that there was this guy, Angelo, and his bandmate Victoria De Angelis, 21, is interrupting: “No, Andrea, not Angelo”, and all of them have to laugh because a rigid studio manager with the Italian name 'angel' would be even funnier for a founding myth. David continues his story: “The guy was completely dumbfounded. 'We can't do that.' We went: 'Sure we can, that's worth the same even if it's just 20 cent coins, it's still 300 euros.” Thomas Raggi, 20, the guitarist of the band, is gasping for air as he laughs, while drummer Ethan Torchio, 20, is smiling dreamily. David finishes: “And then we snuck off before he was able to count it.” [the German text says 'verdrücken' here which is just a colloquial way of saying 'we left', but it entails some sort of a dramatic exit, so yeah, let your thoughts get creative how they left exactly :D].

Four young musicians on the verge of global fame are sitting on a white interview sofa in Berlin, completely styled, babbling across each other like overeager teenagers.

Ever since the Roman band first won the music festival Sanremo and then also the Eurovision Song Contest, carried by the enthusiasm of European viewers, you could say Måneskin has become a phenomenon. “Rock 'n' Roll never dies!”, Damiano David yelled fueled by the adrenaline of winning, and the insinuation that circulated on social media of the singer snorting during the counting of votes in front of a live camera – including their strict denial followed by a negative drug test result – might have given an additional boost to their public interest, their exploding album, ticket and merch sales, and their outstanding success on Spotify.

“We think it's a shit prejudice against rock music that there always have to be drugs involved. We fully threw ourselves into our participation with the utmost professionalism. We give everything for the music. So of course we don't want people to think that we can only do that because we take drugs.” – Victoria De Angelis

Prior to Eurovision, Måneskin was more of an insider's tip outside of Italy. Handmade rock music, not creating something entirely new but paying homage to the good old times with classic guitar riffs and cracking drum beats, being a lot of fun but also quite fragile and vulnerable at times and, first and foremost, conveying a captivating energy. Finally, on the stage of Rotterdam, live after so many months of isolation and renunciation, this wave of energy spilled straight over into European living rooms. It seemed easy to (mistakenly) interpret the winning song “Zitti e buoni” (Shut up and behave) as a declaration of frustration of our youth in times of a pandemic. In fact, singer Damiano David is singing about the favourite topic of the band: the unrelenting need to, against all odds, be yourself, despite or perhaps because you are different. The message fits their provocative sex appeal, which the band uses to demonstrate their independence of gender norms at any given time. But the core essence of rock music has always been the promise of unlimited freedom.

Thus at the first moment, the meeting with Måneskin is kind of startling. It's Wednesday, we are in the top floor of the new Sony head quarters in Berlin. The four Italians have just started their two-week long promotion tour through Europe. In the afternoon there will be a live concert in a queer club [the SchwuZ, but that's not mentioned here] in Neukölln, which will be streamed via TikTok. Around one million viewers will watch the show, some of them even from Brazil, so people at Sony are pretty excited [for Måneskin to come here]. But at first, these stunningly gorgeous creatures [yes, that's the exact wording :D] are standing surrounded by an entourage of people – their management, PR team, a stylist, a photographer, people who can hold a smartphone or a cigarette if needed [this paragraph is worded a little weirdly, especially taking into account that basically their whole team / 'entourage' is just friends of them, but it seems like the journalist didn't know that or maybe they just wanted to describe their first impression]. They seem like fictional / artificial characters out of a Hollywood movie. Transparent frill blouses with blazers and flared leather trousers, even the platform boots, everything brand-new, the makeup makes their faces look like a glossy magazine cover even in person. The smokey eyes of De Angelis and Raggi make them look smug and bored. Later, on the pictures it will probably look cool.

So of course your first impression might be: This band is under contract to industry giant Sony ever since their success on an Italian casting show [X Factor] in Winter 2017. The music industry must have its hand in the game when a band is photographed half-naked by Oliviero Toscani and styled by Etro. Also, one does not simply rent a villa with a pool in Rome to produce new music there, isolated from the rest of the world. And who else went to London for two whole months, shortly before the winter lockdown, just for inspiration? After the TikTok concert in Berlin – De Angelis and David are now wearing fishnet shirts that sparkle with every move, their bare nipples covered with an X of black tape – the band is posing with a few influencers. In the world of social media you would call that 'producing content'. But what does that mean for a band who are preaching their hosanna of authenticity? How authentic is Måneskin? And is their pointedly casual approach to sexuality and gender cliches in today's pop-cultural spirit more than a marketing strategy?

We're in the interview, the recording device is running for not even five minutes, when Victoria De Angelis says: “Actually, we just try to be ourselves and do what we really want to do.” And really: The more you listen to those four how they speak about the early days of the band in their slurred Roman dialect, about the shoe box and their own experiences with being different, but most importantly about their shared obsession [with music], the more you realise that [De Angelis] is very serious. Ethan Torchio, who got his first drum kit at the age of six or seven from his father because he was beating everything he could reach, says: “For me, music is like food. I cannot live without it.” The bassist next to him laughs at his pathos. Singer Damiano David applauds the otherwise more reserved friend for his truthfulness [it says 'klarer Punkt', meaning 'for the point he makes', but it makes it seem like Damiano is agreeing with Ethan here, although it doesn't indicate whether he agrees that yes, music is everything for Ethan or that he understands and feels the same].

De Angelis and guitarist Raggi already knew each other from middle school and they were the ones who tried to form a band at the age of only 13, a band that actually took music seriously.

De Angelis: “It's just difficult at that age to find other people who really put everything into music and who truly commit themselves and are willing to invest a lot of their time.”

Raggi: “We set strict rules and scheduled fixed times for the rehearsals, for every day.”

David: “Fever, stomach ache, there was no excuse. Even if you were feeling sick in the rehearsal room. At least you were in the rehearsal room.”

The way the four of them talk across each other, completing each other's sentences, taking turns in talking and sometimes joking about each other, seems intimate and playful. Singer David remembers how at first bassist [De Angelis] was merciless towards him when it came to her first metal band project, as she told him that he wasn't committed enough [to the music]: “Back then I was still playing Basketball. I was one of the people that Vic absolutely didn't want [in her band].” Drummer Torchio was later discovered through Facebook, even though there had already been a drummer, a close friend, but he was not good enough. It seems as if even back then music was everything for them. Even if it meant that only Raggi managed to graduate.

And why rock, why rock music of all things? Because it's great, the four of them say in unison. David adds: “Actually, it's a genre that allows you to do everything you want to do.”

When they played on the street, they were laughed at by their classmates. But not only there. De Angelis explains that she never wanted to be a typical girl: “I was always deterred by those stupid boxes that people put you in, and that are just restricting and constraining you, because something is only regarded as male or female. I always rejected that. Instead, I just wanted to do the things I enjoyed doing, I went skating and played football.” Torchio says: “Friends who are not friends anymore were already telling me at the age of ten that those“ – he grabs his long, silky black hair – “were wrong. Because I'm a boy and boys are meant to have short hair, long hair is only for girls. I was bullied a lot for that.”

“Compared to the past, people in our age became much more open-minded. It gets better.” – Thomas Raggi

Frontman David on the other hand, for whom eye shadow, jingling earrings and nail polish as well as his bare torso with the tattoos have become trademarks by now, says: “I was actually more of the average boy.” De Angelis convinced him to try out some eyeliner, which he describes as a spiritual awakening: “I liked myself much more [with makeup]. I saw myself more as myself. As if it had been a suppressed desire of mine.” On a trip to Copenhagen with the others, when he realised that it really didn't matter what people were thinking about him, he got his first fake fur [coat? the article doesn't specify that] in a second-hand shop and let his clothing style be guided by his own love to experiment: “I realised that my whole life I was just going at half speed.” When it comes to diversity all four of them are becoming almost missionary.

At the same time, their success is not only opening doors for them. Back home in Rome they are barely able to go out on the street due to all the paparazzi. “[You need a] hoodie and huge sunglasses”, David says, “the mask is quite helpful, too.” And still, none of them is complaining, and Torchio explains why: “Even if those experiences right now may have sides that are not so pleasant, we still know that for us a dream is coming true. We experience something that we always had in our minds, so we are willing to face every consequence that this entails.”

So is the band facing difficult times, is Måneskin going to change with all the success? Again, all of them answer at the same time.

David: “I'm not worried about that.”

Raggi: “No way!”

De Angelis: “On the contrary. Everything that happened to us happened because we are who we are, so we want to continue the exact same way and stay ourselves.”

Just a few hours later, they are at the stage in Neukölln, bouncing around like pinballs, hammering at their instruments, flirting with each other. “We are out of our minds, but different from the others”, David sings their winning hymn against conformism, and: “The people talk, unfortunately they talk.” Here on stage, the four paradise birds [a German word describing someone with a flamboyant personality] with their half-nude-glittering outfits are radiating an incredible energy with the utmost sincerity, and you begin to wish there was a live audience instead of the TikTok cameras, absorbing and spreading this energy. Måneskin. A cry for a life after the pandemic, a cry for freedom and a better world.

“We do what we wished for all our lives.” – Ethan Torchio

#måneskin #maneskin #måneskin interview #my stuff #i'm sorry if someone already translated it but i was working on this for the past 3 hours now so i'm still gonna share it #i know most of it is not very new but there were some quite interesting details in there #and it's just always great to read about those four dorks so i wanted to share it with all of you who wanted to read it but couldn't #enjoy and please ignore any possible mistakes i didn't have the time to proof-check everything

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jellyluchi · 3 years

Text

La Squadra x Gamer!Reader + spice

A/N: I’m not much of a gamer but I have been playing a few video games lately that gave me this idea. Edit: this was drafted mooonths ago when I was still playing Hades which I haven’t touched in a hot minute...

— Genre: nsfw, minors DNI

— Warnings: suggestive content, mentions of oral, fingering

Risotto

Tries to understand and play some of your video games if you decide to teach him, depending on the type of game he’s either really good or he sucks

Prefers to watch you play in either complete silence or let you talk and explain what the game is about

might ask you questions here and there because he’s a good boyfriend who takes interest in his partner’s fav hobbies!

enjoys relaxing decorative games or puzzle games the most. Also horror for aesthetics and good stories.

depending on whether he can tell if you’re in the mood (and yes he can tell) might tease you as you play

it starts with very light touches while you’re concentrating on the game and before you can even tell somehow you’re squirming!

very good at being stealthy when it comes to teasing his partners physically

might even use metallica to heighten your experience! your game is soon forgotten and you can’t remember if you beat the level or not

Prosciutto

Most likely to have you already on his lap when you’re playing if it’s his day off and he’s relaxing

a grandpa who won’t even try your video games unless you can somehow convince him with like.... a 45 slide power point on why he’d enjoy it, otherwise it’s just not to his taste

however, in the occasion that you do convince him, it’s truly a sight to see! This man is as intensely competitive as he is shit at games LOL (running in an fps looking at the ground with no camera control rip)

prone to giving up very fast unless you really walk him through it! Even then might not enjoy it unless it’s an interesting story or concept

will be more partial to games that tackle ethics and morals or are darker themed

But his favorite game is teasing you, you’re already on his lap and he loves giving you cuddles and if your having fun with your game why can’t he have fun with his?

It will be such a sensual and soothing experiencing you won’t realize when it even began before you’re panting a bit.

The best outcome is when you willingly leave your video games to go play with him instead

Pesci

Not big on gaming on his own but enjoys them very much when he plays, loves it if you invite him to play something!

Enjoys building and open world exploring type games the most (especially if the latter has some sort of fishing mini-game)

He likes to be creative with his building or wants to get immersed in some fantastical story

Is also chill with listening to you explain your games to him if he’s unfamiliar and loves watching you play

Now if you want some ‘video games and chill’ type situation you might have to be the one to initiate.

Whether it’s hinting at it verbally or physically he would need that confirmation

But once he knows what you want he’s not afraid to support you under the desk if you know what I mean.

Likes to hear your moans overpowering the video game music because it lets him know he’s doing a good job

Formaggio

He’s already your video game buddy most likely, and he gets playfully competitive to boot

Likes FPS the most, especially if it’s multiplayer because that means he can go against you and keep score who got most kills

But if it’s a story based game he’ll goof off and sabotage missions on purpose to see how he can mess with the game (gfx, mechanics etc.)

Also just generally a fan of shooting things in game because it’s satisfying plus he has really good aim wit all his practice

when he’s not in the mood to play he’ll comment on your gaming and get close to rub your thighs slowly

if you don’t get the hint he’ll get bolder with his touches until they’re on your ass and interrupting your concentration

likes when you get frustrated from his touches and considers it a victory if you drop your game to make out with him

Likes to make bets like ‘if you score ___ I’ll dive between your legs’

Melone

Not partial to gaming but definitely has gaming experience, mostly with rhythm games rather than traditional console or PC ones

He really likes to know the details of games from you and can listen to you for hours explaining your favorite parts

Gets into Sci-fi games the most, he loves the world building and the creative fictional technology that they come up with esp for space travel

His skills with the computer didn’t give him much gaming skills but it did allow him to get used to the controls quickly and he gets better with time

Touching you is something he’d rather do, even if its got an interesting concept because nothing is better than seeing you try to fight your moans

If you’re concentrated in gaming or explaining something he won’t interrupt you, but will invade your personal space till you get the hint

If you don’t, he will only inch closer till he’s touching you, first in innocent spots but eventually between your legs or your chest

Loves giving oral during gaming sessions, if you need support under the table he’s your man

Illuso

Never been much of a gamer but he loves to watch you play, especially when you get riled up. He’ll make lots of teasing comments about your gameplay to make you angry or irritated on purpose

He pretends to look down on your gaming skills only because he knows the anger fuels your hormones

He gets bored quick when asked to play, is more into the avatar making section of the game than the actual game

The type to run around in game going through the surrounding talking to random NPCs than actually playing

His boredom from the games usually leads to other ideas, abandoning his console he, very sneakily, gets behind you. Like a snake he’s quickly wrapped around your body before you realize

You would only notice when he’s making quick work of your clothes, he’ll stop if you ask but if not, and usually you don’t, he’ll tease your inner thighs

Doesn’t really putting his fingers between your legs unless you give him your undivided attention. If you whine, he just asks you what you want (may or may not give it to you depending on his mood)

His goal is to make you sexually frustrated enough to abandon the game and let him finger you instead

Ghiaccio

A competitive gamer himself, you may find yourself actually challenged when playing with him. More likely to play FPS than the rest.

He’s definitely vocal and focused when playing, comments on your every little move like you’re making the worst decision of your life

Thinks bets are stupid (because he’s gonna win, obviously right?) and accept whatever challenge you throw at him

Is super smug if he wins, but if he loses and you make him do something he hates he’ll be a sore loser and curse up a storm saying he’ll get you back for it

Ghiaccio takes things at face value, he’s not going to think you’re here to fuck unless you actually say so (in which case he goes very red not realizing your intentions)

If he’s particularly pent up though, he will wonder about the possibility of but won’t initiate it, you really have to be the one to rile him up well

if you play your cards right, that is, letting him win, handling his attitude about it, getting him flustered enough, he will be open to letting you sucking him off, courtesy of winning the game

the other much more fun route would be to win against him, tease him to hell and back and just saying “shut up and fuck me” in which case he will be more than happy to oblige after the stunt you pulled when playing

Sorbet & Gelato

These two are actually pretty accustomed to old consoles such as the n64, having had grown up during it’s time however you will still have to help them navigate any gaming interface properly

Most likely not used to PC gaming just yet but it’s terribly fun to have them watch especially if you’re playing horror and Gelato delights in the jumpscares while Sorbet really has no reaction

Very much likes the morbid games psychological horrors with gore, their favorite characters are always the unhinged ones

They’re both prone to comment if they’re playing themselves and it’s fun to watch as they’re barely phased by the atmosphere or general horrors of the game

Neither of them have much fun just observing you play your game, it’s more likely Gelato will get bored and whisper something lewd into Sorbet’s ear who smirks and they move into action

The plan is simple, they just want to see you squirm, won’t it be so much more fun to play if you’re taking Gelato from behind while Sorbet goes down your throat?

Sure, in that case you’d be in no position to play by yourself but in perfect position for them to play with their little plaything

they’re really not much for subtlety and two of them and one of you, it doesn’t take much convincing nor man power to get you on your knees.

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t0wnspersonb · 4 years

Text

Kiss it Better (Tsukishima Kei x Reader)

Anonymous said:

Hello I just read your fics about Kuroo, Akaashi and Bokuto and I really liked them 💞 So I was wondering if you could write a fluff fic where tsukki gets embarassed trying to make the first move you can also just add things to your liking If you don‘t want to that‘s totally okay I‘ll be waiting for your upcoming fics thank youuuu 🧡

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Omg that’s so funny because my next story was literally going to be just that! I had a lot of fun writing this one and might do a part two with some *cough* smut *cough* just like Kuroo, everyone is lowkey a Tsukishima girl. I hope you like this anon!

~~~~

Word Count: 2,293

Summary: Tsukishima has always liked you, but you’ve never noticed his advances. A trip to the nurses office might change your mind.

~~~~~~~~

You liked to think that you were friends with the tall blonde sitting behind you in class.

But sometimes…

Thunk.

Sometimes…

Thunk.

Sometimes you really wanted to fucking strangle him.

Thunk.

“Can you stop kicking my chair!?” you hissed, staring at the smirking middle blocker.

“My foot slipped.” he replied coyly, causing your scowl to deepen.

Before you could retort back to him the bell rang, signaling the end of class. You started packing up your stuff, grumbling to yourself about how rude Tsukishima was.

“Don’t you want to walk to the clubs together?” He called out to your leaving form.

You huffed turning around to see him and Yamaguchi looking at you.

There were times when Tsukishima didn’t annoy you, and those were the times you would walk with them to your after school club activities.

You were part of the photography club, which was on the way to the gymnasium that held their volleyball practice.

But again, you only walked with them when Tsukishima wasn’t being an annoying little prick.

Today definitely wasn’t one of those days. He had been bugging you all day. It went from his annoying comments to him poking at you harshly, and then to kicking your chair.

You weren’t sure if it was because he was bored and had nothing better to do, or if it was because he actually didn’t think of you as a friend. Or because he was just simply an asshole.

Maybe it was a combination of all three, you didn’t know.

“No way.” you sniffed, sticking out your tongue to him. “I don’t want to walk with you anywhere today. If it was just Yama-kun then I would. But not if you’re there. Stupid.”

Tsukishima visibly looked annoyed at your statement.

“Y/n-chan.” Yamaguchi called out, raising his hands up as he looked at both annoyed expressions. “You guys should try and get along yeah?”

“Be quiet Yamaguchi.” Tsukishima sighed, moving to walk past you. “If she wants to be childish then just let her. I’m surprised she even got into this class.”

“I’m surprised Yama-kun is even your friend.” you fired back, crossing your arms over your chest. “I bet you aren’t even good at volleyball.”

Tsukishima paused, and then before you could even register what had happened, he was leaning down, incredibly close to your face and to your body. You could physically feel his body heat radiating into your own. His hand resting on the doorframe, preventing you from leaving the room.

“Why don’t you come by and find out?” he said slowly, ignoring the panicked squeak that escaped Yamaguchi’s lips. His gold eyes were piercing into your own, but you couldn’t see any anger in them at what you had said, you couldn’t see an ounce of annoyance either. But there was something else there, something you couldn’t place.

Ignoring your hammering heart and the heat creeping up into your face, you shoved his arm away scowling. “Maybe I will. Maybe I’ll take pictures of you sucking and have an article published in the school newspaper about you being a terrible person and sucking at volleyball!” you huffed stalking away from the tall first year angrily.

You ignored the calls of Yamaguchi and just focused on heading towards your club.

Today was definitely one of those days where you wanted nothing to do with Tsukishima.

The relationship you had with the middle blocker was incredibly strange. One minute you guys were perfectly fine with each other, and next - well it was exactly what had just happened.

Tsukishima scoffed as he watched your retreating figure. But he couldn’t deny the fact that your reactions were incredibly lame, but incredibly cute.

“You shouldn’t tease her like that Tsukki.” Yamaguchi sighed. “She’s never going to like you back if you keep making her mad like that.”

Tsukishima didn’t say anything as they continued their way to the gym.

Everyone knew that he liked you. It was incredibly obvious, and Tsukishima always made sure to make it incredibly obvious.

But it wasn't obvious to you.

The one person that it mattered to the most.

You were frustrating and amusing, stubborn and incredibly smart, quick-witted and incredibly beautiful.

The entire package.

And Tsukishima wanted you to be his.

But you were too fucking dense to realize that.

And quite frankly, he was getting sick of it. For as smart as you were, you were incredibly thick when it came to stuff like that it appeared.

It frustrated him to no end.

Usually what he depicted as playful flirting you thought as him just being downright mean.

It was a constant cycle, neverending.

It was ridiculous.

Actually scratch that.

This was ridiculous.

It had been a couple of days since that last encounter, Tsukishima deciding his chances at winning you over would probably be better if he stopped his teasing for a little bit.

But right now you were nodding your head rapidly in understanding as Hinata talked to you. You were there during one of their practices, to take photos of them. A project that you had to do for your photography club. Takeda-sensei had given you permission to be there to snap pictures of the team.

“- And then I go boom!” Hinata exclaimed bouncing around.

You smiled at his antics. “That sounds incredible Hinata! Do you think I can take a picture of you doing your crazy jump?” you asked, holding up the camera for emphasis.

But before he could utter an answer, Tsukishima interrupted. “We have to start practice, you can just take pictures then.” he said to you, glancing at you briefly.

You rolled your eyes at his aloofness and apologized to Hinata who was protesting loudly at what Tsukishima had said. “He’s right Hinata, I don’t want to impede on your guys’ practice so just pretend like I’m not here and I’ll take as many pictures as possible.”

Reluctantly he agreed and everyone continued the practices Ukai had asked them to do before splitting up into different teams. They were doing a match.

You were honestly in awe as you watched them play. You didn’t think that volleyball could be so… amazing. You had teased both Yamaguchi and Tsukishima about how boring the sport was.

You were so wrong.

You had almost forgotten to take pictures, you were so captivated.

But what had surprised you the most, was Tsukishima. You had never seen him so… concentrated? So serious? So… so attractive?

You felt your face flush, shaking your head to rid yourself of the thought. That was ridiculous. You had never been attracted to the middle blocker, you found him annoying, a completely arrogant, unnecessarily tall asshole, and… and he was incredibly good looking.

What was wrong with you? How could you even think of something like that? How could you - “Watch out!” your eyes went wide as a volleyball came hurtling at you with rapid speed.

Your eyes squeezed shut, readying yourself for the impact.

Only it never came. You heard a loud grunt and opened your eyes to see Tsukishima clenching at his fingers, the ball rolling away from his feet.

He… he protected you from the ball.

Tsukishima’s pointer finger throbbed in pain, he knew it wasn’t broken, but the nail had torn just a bit, blood seeping out of his wound.

He wasn’t sure what possessed him to move, he knew that Nishinoya was closer to you, he knew that he was heading towards the ball to stop it from hitting you. But his body just moved after he called out his warning.

“Oi Tsukishima are you okay?” Tanaka asked running up to him, several of his teammates surrounding him.

He removed his hand to reveal his bloody nail, causing you to gasp lightly.

“I need to stop the bleeding. I’ll go to the nurse.” Tsukishima said quietly.

“Let me help you.” You blurted out immediately, causing all eyes to be on you now. “It’s my fault you got injured.”

The tall blonde nodded, and both of you left the gym quietly.

“He’s got it bad huh?” Tanaka smirked, staring after you guys.

“I hope he can confess properly.” Yamaguchi sighed.

***

The walk to the infirmary was incredibly quiet, awkward almost. But it was just your luck that the nurse was nowhere to be found.

“You can go. I can take care of it from here.” Tsukishima said quietly.

You shook your head. “No. You got hurt because of me. At least let me help.” You started to take out the necessary equipment to help disinfect and wrap his finger. “Go ahead and sit down.” you said gesturing to the bed.

Tsukishima didn’t bother arguing, silently sitting at the edge of the bed and watching you closely.

Even sitting down, he was still incredibly tall. The top of his head just below your chin. You held your hand out his expectantly, he sighed quietly before placing his much larger hand in yours.

Carefully you cleaned up the blood and began wiping down the wound with a cotton ball soaked in alcohol. The smell stingy your nose, but the atmosphere around the both of you was quiet, calm almost.

His hand dwarfed your own, his fingers long and elegant, and surprisingly soft against your own touch.

Tsukishima couldn’t deny the fact that he was enjoying this immensely. You stood incredibly close to him, slightly between his parted legs as you worked. He could smell the soft perfume on your skin and the laundry detergent you used on your clothes.

It was a wonderful smell.

Maybe… maybe now would be a good time to tell you… right?

“I’m sorry Tsukishima.” you said quietly, wrapping his finger. “If I wasn’t there you wouldn’t be in this position.”

“It’s fine. It’s nothing serious.” he said, equally quiet.

“Does it hurt?” you asked, tilting your head to the side slightly as you stared into his gold eyes.

Tsukishima could feel the blush rising in his face, you were just too cute. The way you looked concerned about him. He liked that. He liked that a lot.

“It might hurt less if you kiss it better.” he said. He couldn’t resist, this situation was incredibly ideal to him.

You looked incredibly confused for a moment before taking his hand and gently pressing your lips against the tip of his injured finger.

Tsukishima felt like his heart was about to leap out of his chest, his face burning at the sweet gesture. And even though his finger was wrapped up, he just knew that your lips were incredibly soft. His other hand came up to press against his face, the backside of his hand covering the lower part of his face in embarrassment.

“What’s wrong?” you asked frowning, you had just done what he had said. Your heart was racing for some reason though, you weren’t sure why.

Tsukishima couldn’t take this anymore. He grabbed your wrist and tugged, pulling you into his chest, and then flipping you over onto the bed, his upper body hovering over yours.

Your face was completely red, you thought your heart was about to pop, he was way too close and his face held nothing but seriousness.

What did you do?

“Tsukishima-” “Quiet.” he demanded.

You snapped your jaw shut.

You watched him take a deep breath in before speaking. “You are the most infuriating person I know. You’re stupid and you don’t pay attention to what’s going on right in front of your face.”

Your nostrils flared slightly in anger. “Well right back at you asshole!” you grumbled back.

He rolled his eyes and moved his face closer to your own, causing you to quiet down once more.

“But despite how incredibly dense you are, you’re smart, you’re witty, you’re stubborn, you’re hardworking, you’re pretty -”

You have never been more confused in your entire life. Did he just insult you and then compliment you? Did he just call you pretty?

“ - and I literally can’t take this anymore.” he pushed up his glasses just a bit. “I’ve given you so many hints, made it so ridiculously obvious, and you still don’t understand you dimwit.”

You frowned further at his insults.

“I like you.” He said, “I’ve liked you for a while now. You just have never noticed. I want you to go out with me.”

He couldn’t handle the shy expression on your face after his confession. The soft look on your face, and the dark red blush coating your cheeks. His eyes flickered towards your lips, and he started to lean closer. Your soft hands came up and gently rested against his chest, but you never pushed him away. Your eyes fluttered shut as you prepared yourself for what was about to come next.

You could feel his breath hitting your face gently, causing your lips to part as you readied yourself -

“Tsukishima! Everyone wanted me to go check on you and -” the door opened suddenly, and Hinata stood staring at the scene before him.

Tsukishima whipped his head around with a hard glare at the orange haired male who had gone pale, and then had turned dramatically red at the sight before him.

You couldn’t help but cover your face in embarrassment at the position you and Tsukishima were in.

“I-I’m so sorry for interrupting!” Hinata screamed and slammed the door.

Tsukishima sighed, deflating slightly before removing himself from on top of you. He ignored the blush in his face as he stood up, looking back at you still laying on the bed.

So incredibly tempting.

“Wait for me after practice. We can walk home together.” He said simply before leaving the infirmary.

Did you… did you just get yourself a boyfriend?

You hoped so.

#tsukishima kei #tsukishima x reader #tsukishima x you #tsukishima imagine #tsukishima fluff #haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x you #haikyuu fluff #tsukki #one shot #tsukishima oneshot #tsukishima kei x reader #reader insert #request #requests are welcome #haikyuu tsukishima

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heloisedaphnebrightmore · 4 years

Text

Obviously oblivious [Fred Weasley x Reader]

Title: Obviously oblivious Pairing: Fred Weasley x Reader Word count: 2k Published: 8 September, 2020 Author: Heloise Daphne Brightmore Notes: My first ever Fred fic. Don't go too hard on me, pretty please. Summary: You have liked Fred for the longest time and Fred has been having a crush on you, but you are just being oblivious, until he finally takes the first step.

Harry Potter Characters Masterlist | Masterlists

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You were seated in the Gryffindor common room, talking to Lee Jordan and Oliver Wood about the upcoming quidditch match against Ravenclaw, when the Weasley twins stepped in the room with an identical smile across their face.

George plopped down beside you with a huge grin across his face, making you suspicious. You knew too much about their pranks and stupid little tricks. You didn't mind them as for some unknown reason they didn't include you in their games.

Fred sat down on your other side, throwing his arm across the sofa behind you, the same grin present across his face as his brother's, making you even more suspicious.

"How are you beautiful?" Fred asked sweetly. Using pet names with you has become a habit of his, but you didn't mind. You had a huge crush on the older twin, but your friendship was too important to you to say anything. You just enjoyed his company and treasured the sweet moments as long as you could.

"That grin across your face says I should be scared of you, so not too well." You replied, squinting your eyes at the boy.

"Come on, Y/N. Why would you think like that? We are just two happy people." George chipped in.

"When it comes to you, I can't stop thinking when I will be your next target." You spoke as your eyes wandered between the twins, lingering a tad bit longer on Fred.

"You're exempt of our pranks and you know that." Fred replied, getting hold of the end of your hair, gently swirling it around his finger.

"And why is that?" You asked. Fred's hand stopped abruptly, as if searching for the words. You have never seen Fred speechless, but it made the moment even sweeter.

"Yes, Fred, why is that?" George quipped in with an even bigger smile.

"Because you are my best friend." He replied, his voice more confident than he planned it to be. You felt your heart sink deep, even though you knew he only thought of you as a friend.

"Wait a second, when did Georgie fall to second place?" You tried to cover your pain with some humour.

"Yes, Fred, when did I fall to second place?" George joined in once again, a rather big grin spread across his face. You chuckled at his tone, but your eyes never left Fred's chocolate brown eyes.

"Can you just put a lock on it?" Fred turned to his brother who simply replied with a snickering sound. "Both of you are my best friends, you don't need to fight over me." He replied with a mischievous smirk.

"As if we would fight for you." You scoffed with a playful smile, exchanging a bored look with George.

"Not worth it." George took your side in agreement.

"Okay, well I'm happy you get along so well. You don't have to love me so much." He pouted as George stood up and took a seat beside his brother, both of you squeezing Fred in a big hug. You felt Fred's arm wrap around you, making you shiver in his embrace, but you tried to ignore the feeling, not wanting to give yourself false hope.

"We love you, Freddie." George chuckled. "Some of us may be more than the other." He smirked confidently, but you didn't think much of it.

The quidditch game was already on, both teams working hard for a win. Bludgers flew around furiously, the quaffle changed owners faster than one could see. Seekers attempted to follow the tiny golden ball which was dodging the players successfully.

Your eyes were fixed on the older ginger twin, his confident smirk taking your attention away from the game. You watched as he hit the bludger, sending it straight towards a Ravenclaw keeper, who barely had time to change direction. George offered a thumbs up to his brother, both sharing a nod in agreement.

You turned your eyes away, focusing them on the Gryffindor seeker, Harry Potter as you watched him almost getting hold of the golden snitch. You screamed from the top of your lungs, encouraging him. His hand was right above the ball, before gripping on it, holding it up in the air triumphantly.

You squealed in happiness. Jumping up and down on the spectator stand, celebrating with the rest of Gryffindor. Your smile was visible from a mile away and Fred wasn't one to miss it. He looked at George who just gave him a goofy smile, making him roll his eyes. He flew over to you, lowering his broom over the audience, showing you one of his mischievous signature smiles.

"What are you doing?" You asked as he offered his hand to you.

"Come with me." He replied shaking his extended hand, waiting for you to accept it. You didn't have to be told twice, even though you were not a fan of flying. You knew you would be safe with Fred, even if he was an annoying little brat sometimes. He pulled up the broom, forcing you to lock your arms around him. You squeezed your eyes shut, taking deep breaths, before you dared to open your eyes again.

"Where are we going, Fred?" You asked, your arms tight around his torso, trying to force away your fear of heights as you looked down, Hogwarts only a fraction of its actual size.

"On a date!" He replied confidently. Your eyes shot up, wider than ever, looking at the back of his head, his locks getting messy in the wind.

"On a date?" You squeaked in surprise as you involuntarily started letting go of his torso. He quickly got hold of you, placing your arms back around him.

"Keep a firm hold, darling." He chuckled playfully. "And yes, on a date indeed."

"Shouldn't you have asked me first?" You replied quickly, not wanting to give away the happiness in your voice, although you could swear he felt your heartbeat against his back as you held onto him firmly.

"I'm not clueless, love. I see the way you look at me, I see how you react when I touch you." He let out a barking laughter. You felt a blush creep up on your face, your mouth agape, leaving you with no words.

You could just about see a secluded area at the Black lake, a blanket laid across the grass, a basket sitting in its corner.

Fred lowered the broom, until you could feel your feet on the ground. You got off, letting go of Fred's upper body, feeling your legs slightly wobbly as your fear started leaving you. You weren't feeling bad, you weren't terrified of heights, but you were certainly uncomfortable with them.

You walked over to the blanket, looking down on it, feeling Fred's gaze on the back of your head. You crouched down beside the basket, looking into it, studying its content. There were mini muffins and mini doughnuts in a little box, a few slices of cake, a couple of fruits and a bottle of butterbeer with 2 glasses beside it.

"I can't decide if you are trying to make me fat or drunk, Mr. Weasley." You stood up with a grin on your lips, crossing your arms in front of your chest, raising a questioning brow, trying to shoo away your nervousness with humour.

"I didn't have any of those intentions at all, love." He chuckled as he stepped closer and got hold of your waist, your eyes involuntarily meeting his. "Although I wouldn't mind you putting on a few more pounds." He squeezed your side playfully. Your eyes widened, your lips parted as you sucked in the air. You hit his arm in the form of a reply, not knowing how to answer to that, but your smile didn't falter.

You removed his hands from your waist and sat down on the blanket, letting him pour you from the bottle of butterbeer and offering you the drink. He took a seat beside you, clinking his glass with yours.

"Why did you bring me on a date?" You asked, hoping straightforwardness to give you some well needed answers.

"Why does one take another on a date, love? Definitely not to play chess." He grinned, making you roll your eyes.

"That's not an answer." You pointed out, taking a sip of your drink.

"Obviously, because I fancy you." He replied confidently, making you cough as your drink went down the wrong pipe.

"Excuse me?" Your eyes widened at his words. You felt your face heat up under his intense gaze. "You never showed it, Fred. You always said I was your best friend." You tried to think logically, not wanting to believe his words.

"You are my best friend. Of course I would say that." He scooted closer, his body right next to yours. "But I was very obvious about how I've been feeling about you and you were just blind to it. George made fun of it on a daily basis even before I told him." He chuckled at your dumbfounded expression.

"I didn't... realise it." You frowned.

"Yes, I know. I couldn't be any more obvious and you were still oblivious towards my feelings. At times it was really frustrating." He scoffed. "I, however, saw the way you looked at me, how you reacted when I touched you, how you tried to turn the awkward situations into jokes. You have been even more obvious than I was." He laughed lightly, cupping your cheek with one of his big hands.

You couldn't ignore the proximity between you, your eyes wandering down to his mouth as his tongue darted out, wetting his lips. You looked up, searching for his eyes, watching as his brown irises fixed on your parted lips, before closing the distance between you.

You felt little butterflies tickling your tummy, the feeling intensifying as you kissed back. His lips were something that you have been craving to feel on yours, on occasions forgetting your eyes on them, daydreaming about what they could do to you.

And here you were, with those beautiful lips fighting against yours for dominance, making you silently moan into the kiss, feeling Fred's grin appear, before he deepened the kiss, his hand wandering down to your waist, pulling you closer. It was too much for you at once and oxygen was well needed. You parted, heaving a sigh, but you didn't back away. Your eyes remained closed, you were still under the effects of his kiss.

"It was worth the wait." Your eyes shot up as he laughed and laid down on the blanket, pulling you with him. You followed his movements and placed your head on his chest, enjoying the sound of his quick heartbeats.

"Were you nervous?" You asked as you listened to the irregular rhythm.

"I knew you liked me, but I couldn't be completely calm about it. If anything it made me even more nervous." He confessed, making you chuckle.

"Well, Fred Weasley, I fancy you, so you don't have to be nervous." You looked up at him as he watched your happy form with a big grin across his face.

"Oh sweetheart, I will always be nervous. I will be nervous about making you happy, I will be nervous about surprising you, I will be nervous about second guessing myself, I will be nervous about doing anything in my power to keep you close to me. It's not a bad nervousness though. It's more like I am excited." He explained and you let a cheerful smile spread around your face. You pushed yourself up and kissed him again, feeling his arm wrap around your waist as he pulled you closer.

"I am definitely excited. The big Fred Weasley is mine now." You chuckled as he ruffled your hair playfully.

"And you are telling me that I can't be serious." He scolded you with a humorous tone.

"I am serious. I'm excited about you being mine." You replied with a sweet smile.

"So am I." He pulled you back onto his chest, hinting a small kiss on the top of your head, making you feel content in his embrace.

Taglist: @inkhearthes @bonziandfonzi @hufflefluff-writer @fific7 @haphazardhufflepuff @obsessedwithrandomthings @kalimagik @accio-rogers @pcseidcnsvoid @harrypotter289 @nebulablakemurphy @firewhisky-kisses @iliveiloveiwrite @mytreec @chaoticgirl04 @idont-knowrn @mayaaa-l @imboredandneedalife @pregnant-piggy @prongsies @iamobscuring @nhcwdw

Notes: If you enjoyed it, don’t forget to like and/or reblog the chapter. Thank you :)

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saturatedboy · 3 years

Note

Could I please request a one shot of Donna crushing hard on a fem SO who’s terrified of her bc she’s a lord and has all these scary rumors about her but Donna is determined to win her heart even though the poor girl is as a skittish and meek as a tiny rabbit in the wild

Donna Beneviento x F!Reader

This ended up being longer than I anticipated but I do hope you enjoy!

Words: 3.9k

House Beneviento. The name had always sent shivers down your spine when you heard the other adults talk about it. You were just a female young adult with a liking towards flowers that would grow and intoxicated you with their scent. The stereotypical feminine liking towards flowers had most certainty made you the eye-candy for all the boys but you never seen yourself liking any of them back. All your life you had lived in the Village of the Shadows, you had never caught any feelings for the opposite sex. It was a strange to the elder women, they used to try pair you up with a match but every time you had refused their offering of a male towards you. Sometimes you felt as though you had put your family to shame but there was always another part of you telling you you had nothing to be ashamed off. This was you, you will choose who to love and if you never want to love or just couldn't, you were willing to accept that.

Recently, some things had been off with the Village and it's civilisation. You knew better then to question your religion on worshipping Mother Miranda as you had found comfort in knowing that someone out there was willing to protect you- too bad those days were gone and well, that was when you were just a child reaching the age of 7. Now, age 19, you've came to consider the down sides and the strange disappearance of some in the Village.

"(Y/n) my darling, would you please go collect some herbs?" Your mother had called from the kitchen as you had sat pondering in your own thoughts about the strange noises you would hear outside on a night. Having your head sat on your hand with an elbow on the table, you turned your head to face your mother who was stood with a soft smile and faint beads of sweat dripping down her forehead from cooking over the fire.

"Doesn't the elders go gather the herbs mother?" You questioned her as you move your head off your hand and decided to get up and ready for your journey after being requested by your mother. Your mother however was already caught up back in her work of cooking, completely ignoring you. You sighed with sagged shoulders and moved to collect your white cloak which had been tainted with mud at the bottom. "I'll see you soon mother," You spoke as you paced yourself to the front door and swung it open, being greeted by the swift coldness of the air.

Stepping onto the snow, you breathed in the crisp frost and stepped forward to begin your journey near the forest. Normally the elders would go collect the herbs but seemingly because you knew the area from flower picking, you are now the perfect fit to do it. Pulling your cloak closer to your body, you lifted the hood and let it sit on your head and shoulders and the rest of it draped down and covered you up to your ankles. Your breath had left faint clouds in front of you, making patterns as it swirled. This wasn't the best weather to be out in but you hoped your beige cotton dress would keep you warm enough.

As you walked through the village, you tended to ignore everyone. Their looks on you made you feel so left out. You were the only women of age who hadn't been together with a single boy of your age division. It frustrated you that such social thoughts that a women should be together with a man always made you mad. For the name of Mother Miranda, why couldn't some people in the village accept some don't want to love and some rather love someone the same gender. There was nothing wrong with choosing someone to love- but you supposed it was like this because the population of the village was going down and repopulating the village would be needed. You didn't like the idea but it was something you were taught at a young age. Slipping through tight areas, you made your way towards the the rocky bridge where you would cross to get to the forest where most of the herbs had grown.

You hoped you would find some near the front entrance.

Luck wasn't something you had, you had always been careful when you were younger making sure to never let any superstition past your mind. Any newly made shoes on the table? You would move them. Someone knocked over a mirror? You would of tried your best to catch it. You were always so careful when it came to things like that. It just made you more adorable in the eyes of those who wanted to have you for their own personal needs and you knew what personal needs they wanted. Reason why you realised you didn't have a lot of luck was the fact that the herbs you needed for medicine wasn't there. They had been cut clean and most likely would grow in another month. "Looks like I have to go further in" You whispered to yourself, taking down your hood and lifting the front of your dress up so you could climb over tree roots and not trip over a small pebble. What you didn't know when travelling further into the forest was a pair of watchful eyes...more than a pair of watchful eyes.

Humming a soft tune, you walked past the creepy dolls that were hung by the branches and got ready your small sheers to cut the herbs when you found them. Shivers crawled down your spine as you looked around, you hated those dolls with a passion- well they were cute some of them but mostly scary in your eyes. Everyone knew who's territory you were in.

Lady Beneviento's. The lady who apparently practically controlled the dolls and would use them to her command. She was a Lady. These were the rumours that had passed about your village of your time living there, which was your whole life. You knew every story about Beneviento, you couldn't help it. You had to know all about the stories to know who ruled over you and who you should worship, it wasn't a choice. Searching more, you were lucky enough to come across the correct herbs you needed, they were under a large tree with some small daisies growing underneath it from the sheltered floor by the leaves. Mentally cheering, you jogged towards the tree and leaned down, plucking at the stems of the herbs with your sheers. Whilst you was doing this, you didn't realise the lady dressed in black behind you behind a tree with a hand over a hyper-active doll clamping her mouth shut

She was intrigued at your sudden appearance. She had left her manor in search of a quiet day out seemingly the coldness would pick up very soon and she just needed that air to clear her mind. What she didn't expect was a new person to be walking in her territories and almost in the centre as well. Weirdly, she felt appreciated at the new accompany but she didn't like the fact you came and starting to pluck at her plants she didn't appreciate. She had to keep Angie quiet so she doesn't get spotted, maybe you would leave after you plucked them.

Back to yourself, you placed the freshly cut herbs into a pocket that was in your dress. Yes, you owned a practical dress with pockets which you were more than thankful for. Standing up and stretching, you turned around and smiled at your accomplishment. You felt so proud of yourself being able to come far into the Beneviento's area and being able to be brave enough to not back out. Raising your hand to your hair, you brushed out the knots and started to skip your way back home, humming once again.

Watchful eyes had followed you back to the bridge. She was caught off guard with your smile, how free you looked and how graceful you had skipped. Your humming had became a melody to her that hit all the right notes, it attracted a faint heat to rise to her cheeks. "Are you really acting like that?" The doll had whispered to her owner, staring at the black veil. The owner tilted her head to the side, showing that she was rather confused. "If you want her, quickly let us grab her and she can become out new playmate." The doll wiggled her way out of her owners arms as she had decided to go deep into thought.

Playmate? Playmate meant life to her...you being her playmate struck lightning to her heart and made her start to fidget with her fingers. A pretty being like you- no an enchanting- no...there was no words to describe how beautiful you were in her eyes. You were just so perfect, prettier than any goddess ever. You were fair like a doll, your skin looked so delicate to touch, your eyes glistened with a shine that glossed over your huge pupils. How was someone like you created? Someone that had melted any cold around her own heart. Who needs that boring playmate who was already half dead back at her mansion when she could have you.

Just as you were about to step foot on the bridge, a sudden movement of the wind picking up behind you had made you turn your head. At first you felt dizzy as your turned, your vision began to blur and was soon covered with black dots. The last thing you ever saw was the Lady dressed in black.

"she's waking up~!" A voice had rang in your head causing you to scrunch up your nose and scrunch your already shut eyes closed. The voice was high pitch, much louder than any young girl's voice. Using your hands to feel around you, you felt soft silk under your touch. Opening your eyes barely, you were greeted with a a grey tinted white above you as you were laid down. Closing your eyes to get rid of any excess blur, you reopened them and and breathed out heavily.

"What's going on..." Your voice came out hoarse, making it sound like you hadn't drank in days.

"Maybe we knocked her out a little hard?" Again the high pitched voice had said. You were curious, your mind always got the better of you but your shyness always lingered. You stayed put, staring up at the ceiling as you could hear movement being made around you along with the sound of something pattering against what you could only think of to be the floor. Maybe wood?

As you were about to speak up again and ask where you were, you jumped slightly at the touch of something small touching your ankle. Heaving your body up quickly, you was met with a doll dressed in a wedding gown holding onto your left ankle. You swallowed back a lump in your throat and raised a hand to your mouth, slightly biting down on it on hopes of not to scream. However that didn't go as plan as a small whimper came from your mouth. You quickly moved your body up on what you could see to be a bed and backed away right to the top of it trying to make distance between the doll and yourself. The doll laughed at your actions and you pulled your knees up to your chest. You wanted out. Where were you? Why are you here with this doll. You just wanted to go back home...

More noises came into the room. The small patters against the floor accompanied with larger ones had caused you to duck your head into your arms in fear. If that doll was here, then that must mean the Lady was here too. Those stories of the Manor of Beneviento came running back into your mind. You were here, your escape far gone. You were going to die here.

A sudden cough made you flinch further into your arms and the laugh of the doll had quietened down. "You may leave Angie." The new voice had spoke. The voice held such innocence yet it sounded like a grown women who had seen more than enough. More patter noises went away just as it first came. Thinking you were now safe, you raised your head up to only be met with the women dressed in black you saw from the forest. Tears had already sprung from your eyes and you shook your body, repeating the word 'no' out of fear. Not knowing what to do, Donna- the lady dressed in black- had sat at the end of the bed and just stared at you. You could feel sleep pull against your eye lids wanting you to sleep but knowing that the women you heard rumours about killing people did not sit good in your head, not to mention she was in the same exact room with you.

It took a while but you eventually calmed down, heavy breaths leaving your throat as you stared at her. You felt so small to be near someone who had loads of authority over you. You felt powerless, feeling like a small bunny next to her. "Its okay" She spoke, placing her hands onto her lap sitting up straight. You stayed quiet, going back to biting your lip feeling the taste of slight blood. "I have no intentions of hurting you."

You felt tears once again sting your eyes and your vision had blurred. You just wanted to go back home. Panicking at your crying, Donna had stood up and ran to your side scaring you at the same time. She pulled you into a close hug and rested your head on her chest. Slowly she petted your head, stroking you hair and running her fingers through it. Although the touch was strange to happen, you couldn't help but fall against her feeling weak under any power she had. You were nothing but a plaything to her, that's what you knew. However in her eyes you were the most perfect doll to ever walk and talk. Your tearing soon stopped, although you had been lost in thought for a while that you failed to notice your own hiccups.

Under the black veil, Donna had been smiling at the contact and the way you were responding. She felt your weight against her and felt her heart flutter. Such a precious person against her. She didn't know your name, your likes or anything about you but she wanted to with your permission. She wanted to know what colours you likes, if you liked dresses or if you'd prefer a suit. She wanted to dress you up in many clothing with your permission. For the first time ever, Donna had felt as though maybe the world was truly turning in her direction. You were so adorable even if you had tears in your eyes. She'd make them stop, oh she would do anything to make them stop but she knew she couldn't do anything. She knew she was part of the problem but she'd make sure you warm up to her. She would make sure you would understand her and maybe even became friends...maybe even more.

She trailed her hand from your hair to your cheek, you had fell asleep not to long ago from exhaustion and comfort from the Lady of the Manor. Donna sighed deeply, closing her eyes under her veil and pulling you even closer. Your soft snores had caused a gentle laugh to escape her lips. Surely you didn't have to go back where you came from? No, Donna wouldn't let you. She would keep you, hat's what she decided. Sure you were scared but she was more than happy to work on that with you. She would make sure you wouldn't be scared of her in a while, she couldn't have you if you were. Although Donna had felt an instant connection between the both of you, she was a very patient women when it came to wanting something she wanted. She'll just wait for you to love her, he wouldn't force you into anything. Oh the ideas that spilled into her mind about spoiling you with clothing and toys, there was so many.

Unconsciously, you turned to face her fully in your sleep. Your face was red from the tears that had spilled but you seemed calm when you were sleeping. Like a bunny...just like a bunny. Your nose would twitch every now and again as Donna watched you closely, holding you against her. Mentally Donna was squealing, you were so sweet! So different from others. Her old playmates would refuse to sleep and end up dying because she hadn't had any connection with tem but now, you had a serious connection with her and she wasn't going to let you go any time soon.

And she didn't. But you didn't mind. The day after you woke up, you were left to stay in that same room, with food and water on the side table, for a total of a week before you had decided it was time to walk about and brave your journey. You were worried about your family. Did they forget about you? Did they think you were dead? Why go back if it has been so long since you went back home.

When you left that small room, you were instantly surrounded by the small dolls. You were going to scream but the sound stopped in your throat when you saw them holding what seemed to be clothing towards you. A small note was written and placed onto of them. Crouching down, you gently lifted the clothing out of the doll's hands along with the note and out of curiosity, you gently patted the top of the doll's head. The doll jumped in excitement and jumped onto you, making you yelp in the process, and climbed to place itself on your shoulder. Calming down and gathering your breath, you walked back into your room and placed the clothing om the bed, grabbing the note to read first. The doll on your shoulder looked down at the note too.

Miss,

I am sure you are very confused on what's happening but I just couldn't leave you. You had me at first glance, you are a perfect being you know? So fair and graceful, my gosh your indeed a heart stealer. I won't force you into anything but I think it's more professional to be upfront about feelings than to hide them away. The clothing provided should hopefully be in your size maybe- but If not to do worry for I'll change them for you. I really hope you like them.

Your sincerely, Donna Beneviento

You placed the note down and looked towards the clothing. Gently picking them up, you saw it was a white dress with a silver embroidery pattern hand sowed into it. You felt your heart miss a beat. The Lady created something for you. Surely this was kindness right- no you wouldn't question it. It was sweet of her. You started to think that maybe you should apologise to her. After all you did cry and more than likely disturbed her day. Her actions for you showed she wasn't a killer at all like some of the rumour of the Village would say. They sounded made up. A killer wouldn't make clothes for their victims...and the word 'feelings' popped back into your mind. A lady has feelings for you...you. Your heat beat had started again and sped up a lot. This creation of her for you was so generous. Something you hadn't witness a lot growing up.

Gently placing the doll that was on your shoulder onto the bed, you quickly changed into the clothing provided and folded your dirty clothing up to place at the end of the bed you had been staying in. Picking the doll back up, you placed them on your shoulder and walked back to the door to open it and then step outside of it. The place was rather big, quiet a few hallways from what you could see. "Hey buddy," You spoke to the doll on your shoulder. "Where is the Lady, I would like to apologise for my actions." You watched as the doll looked around first before pointing down the hallway. You followed where the doll pointed and soon ended up in a room where a desk sat at one far corner and a green leather sofa had been placed facing what seemed to be a projection. Sat on the sofa was the Lady, it seemed she was caught up in her work as she was sewing a patch up on one of the doll's clothing.

You coughed to gain her attention.

She turned and for the first time, you saw her with her veil up. Her face said it all, she stood up quickly accidently throwing the doll in her hand on to the ground and reached the back of her head to pull her veil over. "Please," You pleaded quickly, raising your hand up in a 'stop' emotion. "It's okay, I don't mind ma'am." You said using your manners. She stopped reaching to pull her veil back on and faced to stare at you with a small smile dancing on her lips.

"Are you sure?" She asked, raising her own hand to cover what seemed to be scarring from something. You nodded and folded your hands in front of you. Slowly you bowed, showing respect and spoke softly.

"I apologise for earlier this week, I had no right to be so scared of you. My apologise for my disruption. I hope I didn't cause you too much trouble." As you were still bowing, a hand had grabbed your chin and a pair of lips had met your cheek as your head was risen. You felt you face heat up at the contact, it was such a soothing move and it made you longing for more of her touch.

"There isn't a need to apologise, for I would accept any mood you were in." She said as her voice was so close to your ear. You inhaled her scent, the smell of herbs and a smell of roses were diffused off her clothing. You felt her touch once again, this time she had grabbed your hands gently and held them, rubbing her thumbs on the back of your hands in a calming matter. "Would you like to join me and my friends for lunch?" She asked as she quickly moved her hand once again to brush a stray hair from your face. Without using your words you had nodded to her request, making her smile in delight.

"You're smile is very pretty ma'am." you spoke without thinking, not even realising what you had said. Donna was more than happy to hear you speak, your voice was far prettier than your humming but either way she felt the same feelings as she had before.

"What is the fair ladies name?" She asked you, placing her hands on your hips as you shyly looked down at them resting there.

"My name is (Y/n) Ma'am." You said with formality.

"Such a beautiful name," Donna whispered, going back to touch your hand and raise it to her lips to gently kiss it. You was taken back at the sudden action once again, however you did not refuse it.

Again you wanted her to to hold you, just like she wanted to have you.

#donna beneviento #residentevil #residentevil8 #resident evil donna #angie the doll #donna x reader #female reader #writing #lady beneviento #lady donna beneviento #angie beneviento #house beneviento

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bisexualhobi · 2 years

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Yeah the way they went out with a half assed comeback? like why couldnt they have announced the break after the LV shows (or way before but ya know)... I think it would have been way better received whereas the lead up to what was simply a boring ass anthology money grab with not even a Muster concert in Korea was so underwhelming and disapointing. I do think as you have kinda hinted at before there was some serious almost power struggle going on with the company and I think their refusal to do even choreo for those music shows gave me the vibes of just fulfilling contractual obligations. I know I'm being a broken record but its just so frustrating how much better the whole thing could have been handled and particularly RM and Yoongi in how they worded things in that dinner live... their feelings of losing direction /being pushed a certain way were definitely valid and I did feel for RM but also the complete lack of accountability and humility just gave it such a hollow tone.

in my opinion it does show a lack of..... ugh i don't wanna say humility bc i think that word doesn't quite nail what i'm going for but it just comes across as tone deaf and highly unlikeable.

as i've said before - people get tired of someone that keeps winning and yet at every chance keeps reminding everyone of when they were losing. like holy shit dude we get it. you had it hard. that's life. what the fuck else do you want us to say? you are literally at the top of the fucking world now - let it fucking go already.

bts built their entire platform and appeal on the story of being the underdogs. bc everybody loves rooting for the underdog. but the problem w that narrative (and that i am 99% sure they never accounted for bc well - WHO in their right mind imagines they will become the single most popular artist of the 2010s) is that once they blew the fuck up that narrative was automatically rendered obsolete. bts can no longer claim anyone and anything is against them - (because even if they are who the fuck cares) - and that they've had it tough (because even if they have what the fuck does that have to do with the present). their success and popularity is so massive that everybody that follows them nowadays is aware that they are untouchable and have a multimillion business and a fandom that blinds them from anything.

all of that coupled with some very shitty management in the past two years has made bts' success a double edged sword.

on the one hand they grew exponentially thanks to the pandemic - on the other they kept crying about how they couldn't have concerts while people were dying by the millions.

on the one hand they managed to break into the US with two grammy nominated english songs - on the other they lost so much credibility bc of it some of their own fans stopped supporting them and the new fans that came in no longer cared about the music, just about the money and the achievements and the merchandise.

on the one hand they made millions off the english releases and sponsorships that came with it - on the other they put themselves in a position where the company saw the money coming in and kept pushing them for more while they burnt out creatively and have locked themselves in an insular echo chamber that no longer lets them grow as artists.

but then again, when you have the poor billionaires lamenting over how hard it is for them no one really gives a fuck except the people that made them billionaires in the first place. the rest of the public is just gonna see conceited celebrities who were fine with reaping the benefits of their own selling-out until it came back to bite them in the ass.

#asks #bts #long post

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robininthelabyrinth · 3 years

Text

Spilled Pearls

- Chapter 4 - ao3 -

“Qishan Wen has sent the invitations for the discussion conference,” their father said. “They will be holding a competition.”

The elders murmured thoughtfully in response.

Lan Qiren wasn’t sure why, since the Wen sect always held some sort of competition when it was their turn – the other sects tended to vary the main event, feasts and hunts and academic discussions, but the Wen sect loved competitions. Although perhaps it was just Wen Ruohan himself who did; since he’d been the sect leader for so long, it was impossible to tell the difference between his preferences and his sect’s.

“Qingheng-jun can lead the disciples,” one of the sect elders said, and Lan Qiren’s brother stood and saluted respectfully before sitting back down. “As for the rest…what skills should we select for?”

“Equestrianism,” their father said. “And music.”

“Music?” one of Lan Qiren’s teachers – an old man who usually all but slept through these meetings, but respected enough that no one commented on it – asked, blinking awake and rubbing his eyes in a way that suggested he thought he was being discreet. “Since when does Qishan Wen appreciate music?”

Lan Qiren's teacher in music, who'd clearly been about to ask the same question, shut his mouth with a poorly-hidden smile.

“They don’t have to appreciate it,” another teacher, this one of swordsmanship, said, his tone distant and cynical. “They just have to have someone in mind that they think will win. Qishan Wen values victory over all else.”

“And they are crafty," yet another said, nodding. "Including it in the listing might be a stratagem to get us to send more disciples talented in music and fewer in other areas, to reduce our chances of winning the main event –”

“Both riding and music are listed as the main events,” Lan Qiren’s father said, his cold clear tone slashing through the others’ voices and putting an end to the debate. “Let us proceed in selecting disciples to attend.”

The list was quickly settled, and for once Lan Qiren was nominated to go. He hoped it was on account of his musical talents, which he was pretty proud of, although he acknowledged it might very well be due to his heritage. He made plans to go to visit the library pavilion at once, thinking about what scores might be appropriate to study in preparation – based on the description in the invitation, there would be a technical challenge, in which they would all play the same piece, and then an individual selection where each player could show off their personal skills…

“Looking forward to showing off for your lover?”

Lan Qiren slowed to a stop. It was one of the wittier, more personable disciples, a distant cousin of his named Lan Ganhui – one of the ones that thought they were funny, and others seemed to agree.

“Are you talking to me?” he asked, puzzled. It seemed as if he were, but at the same time... “I don’t have a lover.”

“Really?” His cousin was smiling. “But we’ve all heard how highly Sect Leader Wen thinks of you.”

Lan Qiren blinked. “He complimented me once. Three years ago. When I was thirteen.”

With the benefit of hindsight and age, it was clear to him that his father must have been right about Wen Ruohan’s motives: he had only been making trouble deliberately, trying to stir things up. A test of his brother’s mettle as the prospective new leader of the Lan sect, no doubt.

Occasional teasing aside, what were the chances that he'd actually found Lan Qiren to be interesting?

“You’re far too modest, Qiren-xiong. Everyone knows how picky Sect Leader Wen can be – you must have done something to get his attention.”

Lan Qiren was not good at understanding people and their subtleties as a general rule, but he had sufficient practice at childish taunts to understand the implication, and he felt his ears burn.

“Do not speak ill of people,” he said, putting his hands behind his back to hide how his fists clenched. “You should report to the discipline hall for violating the rules.”

“Violation excused,” his brother said from behind him, voice calm – even cold – as always. “Don’t take things so seriously, Qiren; it’s only joking between friends.”

Lan Qiren was not friends with Lan Ganhui, but he probably should be. It was his duty as one of the heirs of the main clan to be magnanimous with the other disciples of the sect.

As irritating a task as that might be.

“Walk with me,” his brother ordered, and naturally Lan Qiren obeyed.

They went in silence for a while, their path the familiar one used to make the rounds of the Cloud Recesses – it was a task they were all assigned once they were old enough, and Lan Qiren recognized the twists and turns of it at once. He wondered what that meant, if anything.

If he were with one of his teachers, he would be able to extrapolate that the subject of imminent discussion was not a serious one; that they felt they could both fulfill their duties and speak with him meant that it was not a subject that required their full attention. But somehow, despite their closer relation, Lan Qiren sometimes felt as if he did not understand his brother anywhere near as well as he understood his teachers: it was possible that in this case the subject was important, but his brother more capable than their teachers of splitting his time and attention, or maybe simply didn’t care about one of the two tasks he was performing.

That was one of the things Lan Qiren had never really understood about his brother. His brother was the great hope of their Lan sect, the bright light of their generation; when he finally became sect leader, it was expected that he would help lead them to an ascendant position in the cultivation world and allow their clan to flourish, one andall. Yet sometimes it seemed as if he saw his duties as merely a burden, to be completed as quickly as possible – he was always trying to do more than one task at a time, trying to finish and put them aside, as if he had compared them to some ideal in his mind and found them wanting, purposeless, and therefore irrelevant, even if the task were key to the well-being of their sect.

Their teacher in swordsmanship – one of the few people his brother seemed to really like, though of course he was properly filial to all his teachers – said that he had the best chance of any in their generation of becoming a true immortal, if only he devoted himself, and Lan Qiren supposed that that was his brother’s goal. After all, hadn’t Wen Ruohan raised his sect higher and higher simply on account of having been there longer than anyone else…?

“This will be your first discussion conference in several years,” his brother said, drawing Lan Qiren’s attention. “Will it not?”

“Since the last time our sect hosted,” Lan Qiren agreed. It had been the Jiang the year after, and at fourteen he was too young to go to an official conference; then the Jin the year after that, and the Lan sect never sent too many people to suffer the rush and bustle of Lanling City. If he had had some extraordinary achievements, they might have sent him, but he didn’t.

This year, though, he was sixteen – just under the official age of eligibility for those not in the main families of the Great Sects, which was seventeen – and known to have some talent in one of the areas in question, so it would be a loss of face for their family not to send him. Otherwise, he suspected they would have waited another year until the discussion conference was held by the Nie sect, who as a close ally to the Lan sect would offer a much safer way to be introduced to the cultivation world.

“I see,” his brother said, and continued walking some distance. “You will need to be mindful of your actions, of course.”

“Of course,” Lan Qiren echoed, and despite his best efforts he felt some dissatisfaction. Beyond the resentment he bore him on account of their mother’s death, his brother had never really paid him all that much attention; Lan Qiren had been assured by several of his teachers that he was merely imagining how much his brother didn’t like him, or at least that the irritation would pass as he got older and more accomplished, less of an embarrassment. Most of the time, his brother’s gaze was turned inside to himself and his own cultivation efforts just like their father before him, so it made sense for him not to know too much about Lan Qiren, but…still. It wasn’t exactly like Lan Qiren was a known troublemaker that needed to be taken aside and especially warned to be on his best behavior.

He idolized his brother, Lan Qiren reminded himself. Just like everyone else. It was only the itchy emotionality of adolescence that was causing him such frustration.

“You understand what you did wrong, then, and will not repeat it.”

“…what I did wrong?” Lan Qiren ground his teeth together, realized he was doing it, and stopped at once. No one else had ever said he had done something wrong during that discussion conference, but perhaps they were only being polite. “Xiongzhang, I am too ignorant, and do not understand. Please tell me what you mean.”

His brother looked at him sidelong. “In connection with Sect Leader Wen.”

“Xiongzhang! I didn’t –”

“You are old enough now to understand how dangerous he is,” his brother said, cutting him off, and Lan Qiren fell silent, because that much was true. When he’d been thirteen and even more single-minded than he was today (and truly, how could he condemn his brother’s disinterest in so many things when he himself was similarly focused on his own interests?), he had been ignorant of the rumors that swirled around Wen Ruohan. It was said that beneath his seemingly composed countenance, he could be violent and moody, impulsive and selfish and cruel – how he had to have the best of everything for himself, and would stop at nothing to obtain whatever it was, no matter who it harmed. And then there were the stories of his mysterious Fire Palace, where he was said to collect implements of torture and to enjoy sating his bloodlust by practicing them upon those unfortunate enough to be his prisoners –

How much of that was true and how much merely rumor, Lan Qiren did not know, but he knew that it was well-accepted enough to be considered news rather than frivolous gossip.

"Yes, xiongzhang," he muttered, and dropped his eyes to the ground. "I know."

"This isn't like last time. We're going to be in the Nightless City, on his ground, not ours - you're not adept at politics, so you might not know it, but Sect Leader Wen's arrogance is beyond belief; he only sometimes considers himself to be bound by the laws and customs of the cultivation world, not like the rest of us. If something happens, I won't be able to protect you."

Lan Qiren nodded. He appreciated his brother's concern for him.

"Try to avoid him entirely," his brother instructed. "And if you do end up seeing him, don't pester him this time! Think beyond yourself: our sect cannot afford to draw his ire, if it turns out that he does not find you as amusing as he did before.”

It hadn’t been Lan Qiren’s fault that Wen Ruohan had found him amusing the first time. It wasn’t like he intended on spending time with the man – it had just happened!

“And what if he approaches me?” Lan Qiren asked, more to be contrary than out of any actual belief it would really happen. Wen Ruohan had seen him as a tool to needle his brother, nothing more, and had probably put him out of his mind long ago - it'd been three years, after all, and Lan Qiren was very young still; if it hadn't been for the Wen sect's selection of music as a main event, he probably wouldn't be going along at all.

“If he starts speaking with you, then you are to respond gracefully, and comply with his wishes until such time as someone can come to collect you.”

Lan Qiren frowned. “Are you sure?"

His brother stopped and frowned at him.

"I just mean, we've met in person before," Lan Qiren explained. "He won't mistake me for a servant; he'll know who I am. And the Great Sects are all equal, so isn't there a chance that we might lose face if one of our main bloodline yields to everything he wants at first request, as if we were some nameless clan beneath his…”

“Are you questioning me?”

Lan Qiren faltered. “No, xiongzhang.”

“I don’t want anything disturbing the discussion conference,” his brother said, his gaze already sliding away and his fists tight at his sides. Lan Qiren thought over his words and was ashamed of himself: he shouldn't have reminded his brother that he was part of the main bloodline, same as him; he knew it was a painful subject for his brother, and to bring it up anyway probably came across as arrogant and tactless. “I am acting as leader for this trip, and the responsibility for everything that happens is mine. Do not make me lose face. Do you understand?”

“Yes, xiongzhang. I won’t lose face for the sect.”

“Good. Dismissed.”

#mdzs #lan qiren #qingheng-jun #my fic #my fics #spilled pearls

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mrpenguinpants · 4 years

Text

Zhongli: Dating HCs

Aww, I’m glad you like it. Honestly, it was probably one of my favourite hcs to write aha. Ah yes Zhongli, the man who I refuse to believe has money and is constantly broke 24/7. An accurate reflection of me when I spend all my primogems on Childe and have nothing for Zhongli.

This is my first time writing for Zhongli so I might have went a bit overboard? When you were gonna write a couple HCs and ended up writing 1k+ words. Whoops? Maybe I should put a read more on this.

[taglist] <- if you want to be added, please read this first.

@hanniejji @mikeysbike @unionwitch @musekala @twistedsunnshiii @stanzastic

Zhongli: Dating HCs

When you first met Zhongli, your first impressions on him was that he was a very intelligent and well-culture man on Liyue’s traditions and history. That was until you got acquainted with his money and negotiation habits. It gave you a bit of whiplash at how, almost naïve, Zhongli was but it was also endearing? It made him feel a lot more approachable and make you feel like less of an idiot when he started spouting off about things that most Liyue citizen’s wouldn’t know.

Your inner consciousness was screaming at you to help him out. You didn’t want to see him get his entire wallet scammed because he didn’t know how to handle mora. That’s how you basically became his accountant. You didn’t know where he was getting his money but if he was throwing it away so easily, it wouldn’t last long.

After a while, you developed a business-friend type relationship with the man. You would attempt to handle his negotiations and try and fix his bad habit of forgetting his wallet and in return, he’d tell you stories and odd bits of trivia that only someone like him would know. It was kind of interesting hearing him ramble on about different plants and machines. Though he did have a really nice voice too which probably added to the appeal. He mentioned once that if you were to ever pass away, he would see to it personally that your send off would be perfect. You told him he really did not need to worry about that.

Overtime, you found yourself beside Zhongli on simple outings. No need to worry about work or wondering where the actual hell Zhongli got his funds from, just friendly chatter. If you both happened to meet on the Liyue street with no work to complete, he’d ask for your company. Through one of your conversation you told him you were originally from Sumeru so he’d take you to special spots in Liyue, offering small bits of history.

One day, Zhongli had invited you out to dinner saying it was his treat for helping him out so much. You weren’t going to say no to his company and a potential free meal so you agreed. It was an overall good time until Zhongli reached into his pocket to hand you a gift, a case to carry your vision. You had mentioned once when you first met that your vision had been accidently eaten by a pyro slime when you were traveling from Sumeru to Liyue, so the casing was burnt around the edges. It was a shock to you that not only did he remember, since you only said it once in a brief comment, but the casing was actually really beautiful. Zhongli gently reached over to take your hands to put your vision into the new case, his fingertips slowly lingering. Then the gears in your head slowly began turning as the evening lamps reflected on the vision case.

“Wait, have you’ve been...asking me out on dates?” you asked, eyes blinking wide at him as he tilted his head to the side. He didn’t appear mad or annoyed, just genuinely confused by your question.

“Yes? I was under the impression you were aware I was courting you.”

You quickly run through the last couple of weeks with Zhongli trying to see if there was anything that stood out. You suppose he was smiling a bit more, going to more romantic areas in Liyue, and he did just give you a new case for your vision...

You wanted to die right there in your seat as your entire face flushed red. You didn’t even realize. So much for calling Zhongli the naïve one. Zhongli slightly frowned as he took your silence as a silent rejection and slowly slipped his hands out of yours before you quickly curled your fingers around his to keep them in place.

“Sorry, hang on. Please just -give me a second to collect my thoughts.” you quickly stutter out as you unconsciously squeezed his hand tighter as you bite your lip nervously.

“Okay, take as long as you need,” Zhongli nods. If you weren’t gripping his hand like a lifeline he’s tempted to ease the pressure on your lip so the skin wouldn’t break.

You did really like Zhongli, you wouldn’t have stopped him from pulling away if you didn’t. But going from your casual friendship to something more?

“Um...would it be alright if we could take it slow? I don’t mean anything bad by that nor am I rejecting you. We could see how things go? Whatever happens happens?” you began to ramble before Zhongli cut you off. He slowly loosens the vice like grip you had on him and moves his hand to gently cup your cheek, to trace along the indent you left on your lower lip.

“Yes, I would like that very much. Thank you,” he smiles softly at you as his amber eyes seemed to glow in the dark. On second thought, you might not be able to take it slow, this one look is enough to kill you.

At first, Zhongli would give you material possessions and while it was very nice and his sense of style wasn’t that bad, you couldn’t help but worry that he might have spent his entire life savings. You have to gently remind him that you don’t need these things to win you over. Just to be himself and let things happen naturally. He nods along and actually begins taking notes, as if you’ve told him the meaning of life. It’s a bit embarrassing but at least it show’s that he’s serious.

Zhongli is earnest in everything he does and sometimes a bit too blunt. He’s still incredibly respectful of your personal boundaries and space but if you catch him staring at you he’ll be honest in his reasons why. Sometimes he’ll keep going and that embarrasses you too much to the point you have to reach over and stop him before your face overheats.

Likewise, his affection is similar. He isn’t incredibly affectionate but sometimes he seems to pop out of nowhere or you’ll be mid-sentence and he’ll sneak a small kiss. He isn’t trying to fluster you on purpose which makes you a bit more shy that he can do these acts with such ease.

Whenever he mentions that he may bore you with his information on odd historical and cultural aspect of Liyue, even calling it a "bourgeois parasite" you quickly shut it down. He should have more confidence, not everyone in Liyue knows what he knows and he should be proud. It’s because of him that traditions are alive, even if it’s just him that remembers them. He wraps his arms around you and embraces you tightly as he thanks you so sincerely, it almost stuns you in place.

If you do happen to fall asleep he doesn’t take it personally. He enjoys the fact that you feel so comfortable in his presence to rest. But he does end up sitting the the same position until you wake up even though you tell him that sitting in the same position, at night, in the cold, for 6 hours straight is not something he needs to do.

You absolutely do not trust Childe anywhere near Zhongli but you’re weak whenever he gives you that small smile. He thinks of Childe as...a friend? Companion? A walking talking bank account? You doubt it’s the last one considering how respectful Zhongli is but you can’t help but worry. But if Zhongli considers Childe a friend then you’ll silently accept him. It slightly helps you get through the day, until you see Childe already sitting at a table waving to you both innocently. I hope you don’t mind that I invited Childe, he says. A part of you wonders if he actually knows what a date is or if the first times were flukes.

When Zhongli is there you��re both respectful with each other, slipping underhanded comments disguised as friendly jest’s. But as soon as he leaves, you’re ripping into Childe. Zhongli comments that he’s glad you and Childe get along so well as you both stare at him as if he’s grown two heads.

Sometime you get so frustrated that you have to sit him down and just clasp your palms on his cheeks as he stares up at you confused. You want to knock some sense into him that while Childe may own a bank, he in fact does not, and he should really stop digging himself into deeper debt with that Fatui. But he gives you that same tilt of the head, a small smile stretching over his mouth, and his amber eyes soften just a tad that it knocks the wind out of you on just how cute Zhongli can be sometimes.

You both never end up formally putting a label on what you both are, which felt a bit unusually to Zhongli who is so rooted in tradition. But as he watches you pout at him that he isn’t filtering anything you’re saying as you pay the merchant, he can’t help but wonder what the customs of Sumeru are in terms of marriage.

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