#it's like that one post 'you never planned to live this far so it's Weird'

[astupidweeb69]

The Roommate (Dark!Ticci Toby x F!Reader)

NSFW One-shot

Author's note: This is my first time writing smut, so sorry if this turned out bad. It's also way longer than I thought, hopefully there aren't any spelling errors. Cross posted on my AO3 account.

Warnings: Swearing. Toby being creepy, he hurts the reader, blood kink? unprotected sex, creampie, biting, it's just... a lot. (4,519 words) - Minors DNI!

___________________________________________________________

Your brother hated his new roommate.

From what you gathered from the phone calls you two had, you knew he kept to himself, was kind of creepy and left the occasional mess in the kitchen. Your brother had tried to include him when he went out with his other college friends, but he always refused. The guy was gone at odd hours during the night, and smelled like dirt and pine.

You told him it was his own fault for posting an ad for a roommate on Craigslist.

It wasn’t all bad though. He paid his rent on time, always in cash - which he slipped under your brother's bedroom door at the end of every month. Plus, he had insisted on not signing any formal documentation. The lease they had was just a last minute document drawn up for a short term stay. 

Your brother would only have to put up with him for 6 months. Then he’d be gone.

But hey, beggars can’t be choosers. And your brother needed someone to pick up part of the rent last minute.

After a few months it had seemed like he’d grown accustomed to the strange ‘twitchy’ man he lived with, that is, until you told him your plans to visit.

You finally got some time off, and it was the only chance you’d get to see him. So when all the hotels in the area were fully booked you were not about to give up. And….your brother’s place had a perfectly good couch available, right?

He was reluctant at first, but after much pleading, he finally agreed.

On one condition.

Stay away from Toby.

You figured he was just being overprotective. It was kind of sweet, but he’d never been that adamant about you not talking to someone before. There must have been something seriously messed up with the guy. And to be perfectly honest, it made you second guess whether you’d actually go through with the trip out there.

But you already bought the plane ticket, and you couldn’t let that money go to waste.

So now you sat in the passenger seat of your brother's truck, the two of you making idle chit chat as he drove you back to his place from the airport. 

He talked about school, the classes he was taking, what parties he’d been going to, and fraternities he’d been considering joining. That last part earned him some of your teasing about becoming a beer pong loving, “Frat Bro”.

Only after a few beats of silence, you decided to ask him something that had been bugging you since your arrival. 

“Your roommate knows I’m staying at your place, right?”

It was a simple enough question. The last thing you wanted was to intrude on someone else’s living space after all.

You saw your brother grip the steering wheel harder. “Yeah. Toby should know you’re coming.” His response was curt and lacking his previous joyful tone.

“You two fighting or something?” 

Your brother sighed. “No just,” He paused for a moment, and glanced at you. “He’s been acting weirder than usual.”

“Weird how?” 

He didn’t say anything for a while, instead mulling over his choice of words. Not wanting to scare you, but still wanting to give you a heads up of the situation. “He’s been talking to himself. A lot.”

“That’s not that bad. Lots of people do that.” You don’t know why you felt the need to defend a person you hadn’t met yet.

Another pause. This one is longer than before.

“You haven’t heard what he’s been saying.”

______________________________________________________________

The road ahead was dark, lit up by the dim headlights of the car. The only thing out here now was trees, broken up by the occasional house. It was definitely far from campus.

The driveway was gravel, the truck rocking back and forth from the potholes and uneven terrain, finally coming to a stop in front of the house. Painted a dull plain white, one story, rather small, but it would do. It’s not like you were expecting a mansion.

After the car came to a stop, you grabbed your luggage from the backseat, following your brother to the front door where he quickly unlocked it. 

The living room was sparsely decorated, with an old brown couch in the center, a small television and a coffee table littered with cans and half finished drinks.

It completely lacked a homey vibe. Definitely felt like a typical bachelor pad. You nudged his shoulder. “I love what you’ve done with the place.”

“Hey, I’m not majoring in interior design.” Your brother shot back, beginning to walk away past the kitchen, calling out to you. “I’m gonna go to bed.”

Your eyebrows furrowed with a look of disappointment.  “Already? I thought we’d, like…. watch TV or something?”

“Next time don’t get such a late flight.” His face stretched into a yawn. “There’s plenty of blankets in the closet. Try not to make too much noise.” Disappearing behind the door of his bedroom, he left you standing in the room alone with your bags.

Time for bed I guess. 

You sprawled yourself out on the couch, placing a pillow on the armrest, and rolled out the fuzzy blanket you’d found over your body. You turned to face the front door. The room was pitch black, with a few beams of moonlight split up by the venetian blinds.

You picked up your phone from the coffee table by your side, figuring you could watch a few videos before you fell asleep.

The screen lit up, temporarily blinding you before your eyes adjusted. Mindlessly, you scrolled through youtube to find a thumbnail that would spark any interest.

You were about to click one, when you heard someone at the front door. Your eyes widened briefly, and you quickly shut your phone off. You don’t know why. It wasn’t like you were a kid and your mom was coming into your room to see if you were actually asleep. But it felt like you needed to shut your eyes.

So you did.

The door opened slowly, whoever it was trying to remain undetected. 

However, the scent that followed gave them away immediately. You actually had to stop yourself from reacting. It was a mixture of BO, dirt, and something else. Something dead.

Without even having to look, you knew it was Toby.

Footsteps, careful and calculated. The floorboards creaking. 

You waited for him to walk by, expecting him to go to his room so you could continue playing on your phone.

But he didn’t.

The movements stopped halfway through, and you heard him, on the balls of his feet, making his way over to the couch you were on.

The fuck?

You felt your throat dry up. You wanted to swallow down your nerves, but you couldn’t react. You had to continue pretending, right?

You could hear him, his voice low and soft, like velvet. A boyish tone, the occasional word being broken up by some kind of stutter, muttering things you couldn’t make out.

He stopped when he got to your side, standing right in front of your face. 

If you opened your eyes right now you’d probably see him peering down. His jeans dirty and torn, honey brown stare filled with curiosity, looking at the glimpses of your curves that peaked through the blanket on top of you.

A hand reached out. 

Cold, yet somehow clammy… texture rough and calloused. 

He was touching you. 

He was touching your face.

Don’t move. Don’t you dare even flinch.

“M-must be the ssss-sister…”

That was the first clear sentence you could understand.

He retracted his hand. But you could still hear him, the heavy breathing. 

His whispering.

“Soft”

Then he left.

Only afterwards did you realize you’d been holding your breath.

______________________________________________________________

“You look awful.” Your brother commented when he saw you the next morning.

It was true that you barely slept that night, made obvious by the bags under your eyes, and the change in your complexion. The interaction with the stranger, the one you’d been warned of,  had plagued your mind, stirring up thoughts that kept you awake. 

You grabbed a coffee mug, pouring yourself a glass, before joining your brother at the kitchen table.

From this angle, you had a clear view of the hallway. There were three doors, one must have led to the bathroom, and the other remaining two were the bedrooms. 

You only stared at one of the doors though. The one leading to Toby’s room. 

You knew, at some point he’d emerge and you’d finally be able to put a face to the name. A face to the hand that touched you.

For a moment, you wondered if you should tell your brother what happened. He’d probably flip out, maybe even confront the man. 

So, despite your better judgment, you decided to keep it to yourself. 

He only touched your face. Sure, it was creepy as hell, but you didn’t want to cause a fight during your vacation.

Your brother clapped his hands together, getting your attention. 

“So listen!” He grinned widely. “We gotta plan out the strategy for tonight.”

“Strategy?” You asked hesitantly.

“Yeah strategy. There’s a party I want to go to. Kappa Alpha is hosting it.” 

You tsked, sipping your coffee. “You realize I don’t know anything about the frats here. Is that like… a popular one or?”

He nodded. “Yeah it is. I’ve been trying to get into this one for a while now, so getting the invite is a big deal.”

You frowned. You were already so tired, and the idea of going to a kegger was not exactly on your ‘to do’ list. But it was important to him. So you complied.

“Okay. What time does it-”

A door opened. You stopped talking.

Your eyes widened to look over towards the sound. 

Toby was up.

The first thing you noticed was a mop of dark brown hair, unkempt, with curls that went in every direction. It was slightly greasy too, he clearly hadn’t showered in a while. There was light stubble on his jawline, and his skin was a sickly, almost gray color. A snake bite graced his lower lip, and there were a few more pieces of metal sticking out the cartilage of his ears.

He shuffled forward, looking tired, still in a pair of plaid green pajama bottoms and a t-shirt with little alien faces on them.

Once he made it into the kitchen, Toby finally glanced over. You looked away immediately, embarrassed that you were caught staring.

He was handsome. You hated to admit it. But he was. You pushed the thought out of your head, reminding yourself of who he was.

“Muh-morning….” He croaked out.

Your brother gave a little nod, just enough to acknowledge him, turning back to you while Toby started toasting a poptart.

“It starts at 9, but we should show up at 10 o'clock. I don’t want to look too eager.”

“Whuh-what starts at 9?” Toby interjected.

Both you and your brother looked at him, before nervously meeting each other's gaze.

“Oh uh!” Your brother stammered. “Just another party.” He motioned over to you with his thumb. “This is my sister, (Y/N), by the way.”

Toby’s eyes bore into yours. You swallowed, trying to give him a polite, reassuring smile.

“Nice to meet you…. Toby, right?” 

You acted unsure. Like you didn’t know his name by heart. Like you hadn’t had your brother vent to you about him for hours over the phone. 

“Yuh-yeah. That’s right.” He looked back at your brother. “Is the puh-party tonight?”

“Yeah it’s at a frat house. Did you…” He hesitated, before finally asking him. “Want to come?”

Toby bit his poptart, shrugging his shoulders. “I've guh-got nothing better tuh-to do.” The twitching man looked back at you, wiping some crumbs from his lip. He didn’t have emotion behind his eyes, just a weird intense focus on your face.

You pretended to be unbothered. 

It didn’t work.

He noticed.

And he liked the way you squirmed.

______________________________________________________________

Toby stayed in his room the rest of the day. Occasionally going into the kitchen, grabbing a snack, usually some kind of junk food, before he’d scurry back into his little cave.

You started getting ready as soon as the sun went down. It’d been a while since you’d been to a party and you wanted to look your best. Or look like you got a full 8 hours of sleep at the very least.

Toby said he’d meet you guys there. Saying something about how he needed ‘to take care of something first’. No one questioned him. Both you and your brother glad not to have to share a car ride with him.

Loud bumping music, the kind that shook a house and pounded in your chest, enveloped you when you walked inside the frat house. 

Flashing lights, a crowd in the middle of the dancefloor jumping up and down. The air was hot from too many people in a room at once. You could barely move through them all to get to the bar.

God you were going to need a drink to get through this.

Maybe even a couple.

Especially after your brother left you alone to go mingle.

One tequila shot, then two maybe three rum and cokes later. You didn’t even know how long you’d been there. Time seemed to freeze. There was only the music, only the dancing, only the bodies moving against you.

You felt hot. Your cheeks burned, and it wasn’t just from the temperature of the room anymore. The room spinned a little when you walked forward. Not enough to consider yourself completely wasted though. But enough to feel…. Friendlier.

More social.

Less inhibited. 

Numb.

After a lot of struggling, you made your way to the back of the room. 

You leaned against a wall, catching your breath, holding a red solo cup in your hand.  You could hear people trying to hold conversations by shouting over the music. 

And there were plenty of people making out. In fact, you’d say the majority of people were just straight up groping each other.

It made you a little jealous if you were being honest with yourself.

You looked around, wondering if maybe you could find someone cute. You didn’t intend on getting lucky or anything, but it would sure beat just standing there like an idiot. When was the last time you even kissed somebody?

Finally, you locked on to someone across the room. Someone with honey brown eyes. Someone familiar.

Toby.

He grinned when your eyes met. It was the first time you’d seen him do that. Large toothy canine’s, that bandage on his cheek shifting slightly. 

Oh god you felt your heart flutter.

You shouldn’t. You really shouldn’t. There was something wrong with him. Your brother didn’t like him. Nobody did.

He creeped you out.

He didn’t shower. 

He smelled like death. 

You listed the reasons out, and damn if there weren’t a lot of them. But in the end it didn’t matter. In the end, it was painfully, woefully, obvious what was going to happen.

And you were already walking over there.

You slithered over to his side, sweating, peering up at him through your eyelashes. Trying to look cute. Desirable.

It was working. 

He could’ve eaten you up if you gave him the chance. 

But you didn’t know that.

You fiddled with the end of your skirt, the jacket you originally wore tied around your waist. A flush on your cheeks, you let your hand gently touch his shoulder.

“H-hey… glad to see you made it.”

He tilted his head to the side, leaning down to hear you better. It made your stomach stir with excitement, he made you feel small kneeling down like that. But you liked it. Liked that he was paying attention to you, and only you.

“Whuh-what did you say?” His breath was hot on your cheek. Using the loud music as an excuse to get closer, to touch your skin. Making the hair on your neck stick up.

You breathed heavily in his ear on purpose. “I said, I’m glad you made it.”

Toby’s lips parted, not responding at first, but not moving away either. “Oh? Yuh-yeah?” He sounded amused, voice lowering an octave. “Excited to suh-see little ole’ muh-me?” 

It was kind of a stupid, cheesy thing to say. Like he didn’t really know how to flirt, but maybe saw a couple movies and memorized the lines. But it somehow worked for him.

“Oh, I’m sure nothing about you is little.”

Why did you say that?

Why?

It just came out naturally. Oh god, now your face felt flushed from embarrassment.

You felt him touch the side of your face. He chuckled, a low rumble in his chest, it sounded heavenly.

“Yuh-you know, I’m having trouble huh-hearing you.” He paused looking around, making sure no one was watching. You wondered why. 

“Do you want to go somewhere more private?”

That was enough to make heat travel between your thighs. 

Fuck. 

One meek nod from you was all he needed, before grabbing your wrist tightly.

Too tight, like he was unaware he could hurt you. Or maybe he liked causing a little pain?

He dragged you upstairs, practically lifting you with one arm, you felt like you were gliding over the steps. The muscles of his arms barely flexing under that hoodie of his, as if you were weightless.

He was strong. 

You both traveled through the hallway, careful not to bump into anyone loitering in the hall. Some of the other party goers shooting you looks, but they were mostly directed towards Toby. They weren’t judging you or anything. In fact, they looked worried, maybe even a little scared. You started to wonder more about him. What was his reputation like if this was everyone’s reaction to him? Or perhaps he really just looked that scary. 

So why did he turn you on? 

He pushed you into an unoccupied room and flicked the light switch on.

You barely registered him locking the door behind him.

With one shove of his palm he pushed you backwards onto the bed. Your arms flailed a bit out of instinct, falling down on the mattress with an ‘oof’.

You swallowed thickly, watching him eye the way your legs had parted slightly. Your skirt hiking up dangerously on your thighs. You had to fight the urge to close them.

“Yuh-you look scared.” That velvet, sweet, voice of his was twisted by something sick. 

“Are you?” His head cocked to the side, a wolfish grin on his face.

“Yes.” Was your reply. You didn’t feel like you could lie to him now. Feeling too exposed to even think straight.

He licked his lips, slowly approaching you. His fingers danced across your shoulders, traveling down your arms, sending goosebumps down your spine. They were cold and calloused, just like you remembered from the night before. 

“Then whuh-why did you follow me here?” He cupped the side of your face, his thumb grazing across your bottom lip. You were going to respond, but he quickly shoved his finger in your mouth, gagging you. He wanted you to suck on them, but he didn’t communicate that well. “Why duh-did you….approach me?”

You let your tongue glide over his finger. His eyes narrowed, watching your face, before he started talking to himself. “Fuckin’ stuh-stupid.”

You paused. Was he talking about you? 

“Should be whuh-working tonight…” He muttered. “Target just downstairs…. Ssss-so easy…this better be worth it…..” Toby chuckled to himself like he just told a joke.

You didn’t understand what was going on. Should you just ignore him and continue? 

Toby retracted his hand from your mouth.

“Sss-so pretty….” He pushed your back onto the bed, crawling over you, his broad chest heaving, face pink and eyes lidded. Pupils dilated with lust. “So…. suh-soft….(Y/N)....” 

You shivered when he said your name like that, feeling your panties dampen even more than before. Especially when he started running a large hand up your inner thigh.

You let out a shaky breath.

“Yuh-you like it when I touch you…. I know you do…” Your eyes flickered down at him, letting him continue his ramblings, Toby’s face breaking into another evil looking smile. “Luh-letting me touch you last nuh-night…. Pretending to be asleep.”

Your stomach dropped. You couldn’t hide it in your face, he fucking knew. 

He fucking knew the whole time. 

He burst out laughing at your expression. “Yuh-you’re still not even telling me to stuh-stop now!” Toby gripped your hip with one of his hands, lifting up the hem of your shirt with the other. 

Before you knew it, he tossed the fabric over to the corner. 

Your bra was next. 

In any other circumstances you might’ve found it cute, or funny, when he struggled with the clasp. But something told you pointing it out to him wouldn’t have been a good idea. 

He groaned at the sight of your exposed torso, immediately diving into your tits. Your nipples perked at the attention. 

He was right. You weren’t stopping him. Your body screamed at you to. The smell of dirt and grime, of all things dead and decaying, it permeated off of him the more he touched you.

Toby’s mouth latched on to your left breast, the other gripped tightly in his hand. You knew you’d have bruises there tomorrow. You didn’t care. 

He licked and nipped at the tender flesh, the swell of your tits heaving, your head thrown back and lips parted, letting out soft moans here and there.

A noticeable bulge grinded against your leg, as he huffed, humping himself against you like a dog. 

After a while, he finally lifted his head up. 

Toby looked you in the eye, grinning, licking your nipple teasingly one last time, before his attention moved to your skirt. 

His hands searched your sides for a zipper, he grunted out of irritation when he couldn’t find it immediately. 

You took the opportunity to gently put a hand over his, guiding it to where it was. “Here.” You said softly. “Let me help you.”

His eyes snapped up to your face when you touched him. 

Immediately, his lips crashed onto yours. Needy, desperate, quickly shoving his tongue down your throat. You kissed back, swirling your tongue around his, ignoring the weird taste of metal coming from his mouth. His breath was hot and heavy, kisses sloppy. You doubted he got much practice, but he seemed to be learning quickly.

He made up for it with enthusiasm.

Finally pulling away, you both unzipped your skirt together. Lifting your hips off the bed, you shimmyed them down your legs, Toby watching in fascination.

“I’m guh-gonna fuck you.” He stated matter of factly. Then he whispered something that made your blood run cold. 

“...Fuck you bloody.”

Shit this guy was scary.

In a few seconds, he ripped his hoodie off, along with his shirt. His chest was heavily scarred, a noticeable slash starting from his left side over to his shoulder, and a dark happy trail rising up from the waistband of his jeans.

You didn’t comment on it, but it was worrisome. You could only imagine what would cause someone to get hurt so badly and so often.

That said, Toby was definitely toned. A bit sickly looking, but his muscles had just a hint of a six pack formed. Maybe he did more exercise than you initially thought. 

He kicked off his jeans next, unceremoniously pulling his boxers down, revealing himself to you. Lazily, he stroked himself, a thick layer of precum smearing down his shaft. It was long, veiny, but not very girthy. A flushed red tip, looking painfully hard.

You pulled down your panties slowly, already soaked, and ready. The anticipation was killing you, but you wanted to make him wait for it. His Adam's apple bobbed watching you, and you liked reveling in his stares.

“Guh-gonna split you in two…” Toby murmured, to no one in particular.

He hooked his arm under one of your legs, his body shivering with need, pulling your hips against him. He glided his shaft over your cunt, rubbing your clit slowly. He noticed you tense, how you whimpered slightly, and how your slick covered him more at the action. Looking in awe like it was some revelation to him.

Toby licked his lips, before finally enveloping himself in your heat. 

It was quick. Like he was slamming a drawer shut, but he immediately bottomed out. You gritted your teeth in pain, before crying out when he started viciously pounding into you. 

It fucking hurt. It hurt a lot.

“Shit..! Tuh-tight!”

Obviously, your muscles had tensed around him, feeling overwhelmed by the sudden fullness of his cock stuffing you. Unable to adjust.

You whimpered when he didn’t let up, tears pricking the corner of your eyes. A dull ache between your legs as he continued thrusting. The wet sound of skin slapping together coming from where the two of you were joined, burying his face in your neck, breathing in your scent.

Toby inhaled sharply, before you felt his mouth open wide.

Teeth broke through your skin instantly, a warm liquid dripping down your neck.

You screamed.

You screamed louder than you ever have in your life.

You screamed bloody fucking murder.

“Toby!” Clawing at his back, trying to get him to stop, you started crying. “Toby! Please!”

Luckily for you, he released his jaw to call out “(Y-Y/N)!” Not understanding your cries weren’t from pleasure.

It egged him on, encouraged him. His pelvis slamming into yours, with no let up, your tits bouncing at the force. Itching his fingers to your clit, he rubbed it in harsh circular movements, making you tighten around him.

You babbled nonsense. Finally some of the pain subsiding for pleasure, and maybe it was the lingering effects of alcohol, or the slight blood loss, but you felt a buzzing in your head. Basically incoherent, the faster he went. The brutal, bruising speed.

The way he gripped your breast, the way his hand remained on your pearl, trying his best to get you to finish, but not quite knowing how. 

Something started to build. 

More and more.

Hearing him growl, pant, like an animal. It was doing something to you.

You moaned loudly, wrapping your legs around him. The coil snapping, muscle spasming, pulling his cock in deeper, triggering his own climax. 

His hips stuttered against you, letting out a gasp. A warmth filling you, Toby completely emptying himself inside with a deep groan, eyes rolling back in his head. 

He gave a few sloppy, slow thrusts, before finally rolling off, and onto the bed next to you.

His cum leaking out of your cunt and staining the sheets.

Everything went blank for a moment, realization only just settling in. The gravity of the situation, the blood on your neck.

And an arm wrapped around your shoulders, drawing you close.

“I knew you’d be worth the truh-trouble.”

[ihavethedreamies]

Deserted | Hoshi

Kwon Soonyoung (Hoshi - Seventeen)

Rating: M (18+) MDNI

Word Count: ~5.1k

Pairing: Hoshi x AFAB!Reader

Genre: Sci-Fi AU!, Reader-Insert, Smut, Some Plot, Hookup/One-Night-Stand/Strangers to Fucking

!!This is smut…if that much isn't clear you should probably leave now!! MDNI!

Warnings: She/Her Pronouns used, Pet Names (Sweet Girl, Baby Girl, etc.), Swearing, Kissing, Oral (M! & F! Receiving), Deepthroating, Unprotected Sex (Use a condom!), Added some piercings for ~flair~

Author's Note: I had my best friend read this the other day and she said it was a little much for her, but still enjoyable and she was sure others would love it.

I am planning on doing something like this for each member, so stay tuned!

-> Series Hub <-

-> Woozi's <-

-> Wonwoo's <-

-> S.Coup's <-

I am cross-posting this on Archive under the same name. Please reblog! If you know anyone that would like this or future fics but they aren't on Tumblr my name and icon are exactly the same on the other site. Happy reading!

"Oh, you have got to be kidding me." You groaned as your sand-rover grumbled in protest, slowing down before it halted. The engine not only shut off, but it let out a giant puff of black smoke. The smell of burning rubber stung your nose and you groaned louder, grabbing your bag off the passenger seat. Throwing the door open, you're glad that happened as the sun was setting and not when it was high in the sky. The desert, however, could be very cold at night. A gust of wind blasted against the door, almost slamming it shut on your legs. With a yelp, you swung out your arm to catch the door and sighed when it didn't keep going. Unwrapping the thin scarf around your neck, you rewrapped it around your head and face to protect you from the blowing sand. Slipping your goggles on over to cover your eyes, you winced when the leather cracked further. Getting another strap would be a pain in the ass. Grabbing the door, you let it slam closed and slung your bag over your shoulder. Walking around the vehicle, you noticed that is had been hit harder than you anticipated. Since your rover was just that, you had no gun mounted on it, so when the acid-spitting space worm shot out of the ground, you could only flee. The back tire had finally been eaten away enough to go flat and there was also a hole that led to the gas tank. Only a bit of the fuel dripped out and you knew there was no chance of getting the now wrecked rover anywhere. Climbing up on the other back wheel, you got the hatch in the back open so you could grab your bigger pack. Grunting, you swung it onto your back and cinched the straps tight. Turning back to the last outpost you had been at was a no go. There was a huge alien monster in the way. You weren’t sure where the next outpost was, so you pulled out your old, beaten up holo-tracker. When you turned it on, the holographic screen glitched, so you slammed the body of the device against your thigh a few times and then it evened out. Clicking the buttons, one of which kept getting stuck, you saw that the next outpost was miles away. Walking that far would be an absolute drag but at least it was going to be night.

"Freaking desert planets…" You grumbled as if you had ever lived on a different one. You grew up on Sierra-Victor-Tango, but after taking a trip to several other human worlds, you learned that your home was…well, a shithole. Everything was old and falling apart. In the cities, crime was rampant, and the smaller outposts and towns were poor. When you told your mother you were going out to scavenge through the desert, she was unsure. Not because she was worried for your safety, but she had no idea what you hoped to find. It was a sandy wasteland inhabited by weird space bugs and lizards. You had never known earth like your grandparents so when you learned Terra animals and bugs looked so different, you understood why your grandma was so skeeved out.

Looking back at the wrecked rover, you wondered if it could give you some credits for scrap, but the work to get all the way out to it was not worth it. Hiking up your pack again, you set off, holding the scarf to your mouth as a gust of wind blasted you. A little blinking cursor flashed on your holo-tracker indicating where you were as you walked toward the setting sun. Behind you and to the right, the two different moons rose higher and got clearer. Twinkling stars began to appear and the cold was starting to set in. In the distance, you saw a giant rock outcropping and you headed for it. It was off the packed-in road, so you couldn't go very fast in the shifting sand.  When you reached the rock, you walked around to the other side, looking for a crack or something you could wedge into for shelter. What you were not expecting was some kind of shelter erected against the stone. It looked semi-permanent and constructed around some kind of indent in the giant rock.

Creeping closer, you saw someone sitting at a fire pit, their back to you. What startled you the most though, was a giant feline-like shape lying next to the fire as well. You had never seen one that big and it looked like a tiger from the books your grandmother brought from earth. Instead of orange with black stripes, it was black with white stripes and had long top fangs. The wind shifted; it was coming straight behind you instead of at you. The beast lifted its head, beginning to growl. At this, the person turned around and you saw it was a man. He had a scar across the bridge of his nose and his ears were heavily pierced. Another piercing accented his right brow, and he had a long narrow tattoo behind his ear and down his neck. You immediately shot your arms up in surrender and he motioned his tiger to lay down.

"Who are you?" He called and you dared not step closer.

"Uh…(Y/N), of Morgran Town." You had never seen someone like him before. He was incredibly attractive, and his poncho-like cloak hit right at his ribs, and he had nothing on under it. His muscles were toned, and his skin was smooth other than a scar near his hip. Tight leather pants clung to thick thighs and his big boots highlighted his long legs. Even his arms were well defined, a belt holding some sort of flask wrapped around his right bicep. His eyes were bright yellow, and you didn't know that happened naturally, his hair was white with black tips, reminiscent of his tiger.

"Morgran Town? You’re a long way from home." He replied, motioning with his hand for you to come closer. Finally, out of the shadow of the rock, he could see you in the double moonlight. You felt…tiny. He wasn't super big, not like some you've met, but he wasn't short either.

"Well, I'm a traveler, my rover broke down a few miles back." You finally let your arms down and instead moved to grip the straps of your pack.

"Headed to Korvo?"

"Yes."

"Don't."

"What? Why?"

"Two weeks ago, they got hit by slavers, it’s a ghost town." The man motioned you closer and toward a stump he had carved into a seat. Slowly, you walked the long way around, avoiding the cold gaze of the animal. You removed your pack, letting it thumb next to your seat, but you didn't take off your other bag; just in case you had to flee. Now that you were closer, you could tell that some kind of meat was being roasted on the fire.

"It won't taste too good because I can't really cook, but it will be cooked." He flashed a smile, and it took you off guard. He was…adorable.

"You'll share?" You looked at the roast, your mouth watering. You hadn't had fresh meat in months, only dried stuff. You wondered if he made the kill or his pet.

"Don't worry about Horanghae, he won't bite unless I let him." He waved at the animal, and you nodded, still feeling nervous in its gaze.

"I'm Hoshi." He held out his hand to shake and you shyly returned the gesture, and he sat back down at a long bench.

"You're a traveler? What do you do that for?"

"Oh, uh, I'm mostly looking for old wrecks of like shuttles and ships and stuff." You shrugged. It took forever to find things like that, but you gained a knack for it, and it got you a crap ton of money sometimes. While not official, you basically worked for the International Assembly as a freelancer, so you did jobs at your leisure.

"That must take a long time." He smiled and you shrugged.

"Sometimes. What about you?"

"I'm a Ranger." He held up a medallion hanging around his neck that had an upside-down triangle-like logo on it. You had heard of them before, there weren’t too many of them, it was hard to get accepted. They traveled the desert and worked as bounty hunters. That's all people really knew about them.

"So, if Korvo is a bust, where should I head next?"

"Hm. There's nowhere close really, not that you can get to easily by foot…I can't leave here for a few days, so you can stay with me till then. I'll give you a lift after." He jutted his thumb over to a hover bike that was resting next to his abode.

"Oh! Thank you. That's very generous." You let out a sigh of relief, you had begun to wonder what you were going to do. You were really bad at hunting and had only so much water in your canteen. He told you about his situation as you waited for the meat to be done. He had a well that was in the back of his tent, which was half in the rock. He had blown a giant cave into it with a grenade and set up his home. Horanghae would hunt for him, and he had a communication relay set up as well to talk with the rest of the Rangers.

"I only have one place to sleep though…" He finished off his explanation and you waved him off.

"I can sleep on the ground, not the first time I've had to."

"No way. What kind of person would I be if I let my guest sleep on the ground?" He shook his head. Thanking him, he declared the food done and hacked of a chunk for you. Hoshi speared the meat on a wooden skewer and handed it over. Eagerly eating the food, he watched in amusement at your ravenous behavior and then ate himself.

"Thanks. I can't begin to thank you; I would've been a goner." You shuddered at the thought. If you had arrived at Korvo and found it wasted, you might have had a breakdown.

"Don't worry about it!" He took the rest of the meat off the spit and gave it to the tiger. He led you inside his hut, even carrying your big pack in for you. It was nice and cozy inside, beautiful colored Afghans and rugs were laid out everywhere. The front room was like a living room and had a pile of pillows to sit at and even had a fairly nice holo-screen set up. There was a curtain against the left wall that he told you led to the bathroom. The next room was the bedroom essentially and he told you to go in and make yourself comfortable, he would sleep in the front room. Thanking him again you scurried into the back. That's where he had his communication equipment set up, and there was an actual bed in there! Under all the blankets and pelts, there was not just a sack of straw or even a crate; it was an actual mattress. You hadn't slept on one in almost a year. Taking your boots off, you jumped on and groaned at the comfort. Pulling the softest Afghan over you, you drifted off quickly and slept better than you had in a while.

A soft beeping stirred you from your sleep. Glancing at your watch, you saw it was almost sunrise and so you sat up, stretching with a groan. The beeping was coming from the monitor he had set up. Not wanting to invade his privacy, you got up to go into the other room and inform him. He was still asleep, having spread out across the floor and pillows. His tiger must have been outside. It would have been cute to see him sleep like that if it wasn’t for the fact his torso was now completely uncovered and only his lower half was covered by the blanket. Not just that, but his tight pants were thrown over a chair in the corner, and the blanket was tented in a very obvious way. The realization made you squeak in embarrassment, and you fled back into the other room. While you had not been with too many guys before, you knew for sure what he was hiding under there. The soft beeping continued from the monitor, and you wondered what you should do. If he had to go in there to check on it, he might not realize he had a…problem. Living alone probably allowed him some freedom, but you were here, and you weren't sure he would think of that.

Dashing from the back room into the bathroom, you realized how bad you had to go. Once that was done, you realized in shock that the plumbing was…actually plumping. Kind of. It was one of those high-tech situations that vaporized the waste into nothingness. The sink actually gave you water and it seemed so would the shower. As you were still in there, staring at your face in the mirror, you kept thinking of how to wake him. All of a sudden, the beeping got loud enough for you to hear in the other room and when you peaked your head out, you saw he was stirring. That solved that problem. Peering through the curtain, you watched him get up and your jaw dropped as the blanket fell. Luckily, he was at least wearing undergarments, but they were tight and hid very little. He was very nicely defined, his muscles weren't huge, but he still looked extremely good. His hair was messy, and you were enraptured watching him stretch. He trudged into the back room, scratching his chest and seemingly ignoring his morning problem. You heard a ding and he spoke to whoever was on the other line. His voice was rough from sleeping and you knew you were in danger. How is it that you managed to find such a gorgeous man out in the middle of the desert? Another voice responded to him, but you couldn't pick out any specific words and soon their conversation was over, and you jumped back into the bathroom and away from the curtain.

"(Y/N)? You in there?" He was standing right on the other side, and you swallowed before answering in the positive.

"I, uh, need in there, but…" You knew why he was hesitating and for some reason, some stupid little voice in the back of your conscience screamed loud enough for it to come out of your mouth.

"I can help you with that." You blurted and gaped at yourself in the mirror. He didn't say anything, and you kicked yourself. Why, why did you say that? Before you could say anything else, the curtain pulled back and you saw him behind you in the reflection of the mirror. His look was much different than the night before. His yellow eyes that shined with laughter had turned sharp. It made you shudder as you made eye contact with him indirectly through the mirror.

"I-I mean, I don't know how to thank you for helping me…So, I uh, can help with whatever." You were glad the mirror didn't go too low, otherwise you would definitely be staring. You could see him slowly look you up and down and you froze under his gaze. It was like what the tiger did to you last night, but ten times worse. You felt like a deer about to be eaten, and it turned you on to no end. Wandering around the desert for a living doesn't exactly afford many opportunities for romantic or sexual escapades. You figured the case was probably pretty true for him as well, if not more. Realizing in the night you had shed your shirt; you were just standing in the wrap-around you used as a bra and your leggings. Because of the heat of the desert and the tightness of said leggings, you usually went commando, and you wondered if you were wet enough for it to soak through the fabric.

As he stepped into the small space, he let the curtain fall behind him but didn't step completely through the entryway.

"Are you sure?" He stared you in the eye, once again through the mirror, you did not yet have the courage to turn around. While you wanted to say you were joking, that it was just an impulse to tease, you couldn't. Seeing him to begin with was enough, let alone in his current state.

"Are you sure?" You shot back. You thought yourself rather plain with no distinctive features. Your freckled skin from years of sun exposure was highlighted strangely by the tan line that formed around your goggles. You were covered in dirt too because of wandering out in the blowing sand. His poor bed was probably covered in sand too. Not easy to find somewhere with running water, let alone hot water, your hair was pulled back into a braid but was not exactly clean. You were glad body odor had been genetically eradicated decades ago. Plus, compared to him, you were painfully average.

When he didn't verbally respond, you grew even more nervous, but he stepped in further till he was standing a few steps behind you. He peered at the mirror from behind, and he was nearly a head taller than you. His stare was even more intense now and you shivered. Taking a deep breath, you finally worked up the courage to turn around, and he was immediately on you. His kiss was searing, and you immediately groaned. Nothing about it was gentle, it did truly feel like he was trying to eat you. He bit your bottom lip and you moaned, his tongue quickly flicking against your own. Something cold and round hit your teeth and you realized his tongue was pierced. Oh lord. Hoshi's hand had come to rest around your throat, under your jaw, but was in no way harsh or tight. This way, he could angle your head just right. Your neck protested some and so you propped up on your tip toes, tipping your head and allowing the kiss to deepen further. His second arm wrapped around you, almost encircling you while his hand gripped your ass. The hand on your jaw moved to the back of your head and you wrapped your smaller hands over his biceps. Pulling back for air, his fingers buried further in your hair and yanked your head back so he could kiss down the column of your throat. You moaned as you felt his teeth buried slightly into the flesh, then sucked hard, definitely leaving a mark. As he pressed you so close to him, you could feel his covered hard-on against your bare stomach. Your head swam as he sucked on your earlobe and his hand left your head to wrap around your back.

"Jump." He ordered and you followed, his mouth landing on yours again as he left the bathroom. The man easily carried you and brought you to the bedroom, "Put me down a sec." You told him. Hoshi raised his eyebrow in question but did so. You immediately sank to your knees, and he groaned before you even touched him.

"You sure?" He asked.

"If I go to do something, I'm sure." You told him, implying for him to stop asking. He nodded and you nervously but quickly reached for the waistband of his only item of clothing. Exhaling, you removed the garment and gaped as he stepped out of it. Swallowing a build-up of saliva, you no longer had to imagine. What shocked you the most however was the two metal spheres adorning the head of his cock. A full reverse prince albert. That was the hottest thing you had ever seen.

"Good?"

"Yes." You cleared your throat, wiggling your jaw a bit then reached for him, laving your tongue around the head, the metal imbedded there cold where his flesh was hot. He swore as you began to descend. Your jaw protested some, but in the best possible way. You saw his eyes widen in shock then narrow as he moaned, your nose reaching his pelvis. Swallowing around him, the piercing was an odd sensation, you pulled back as little as possible so you could still breathe. Once you found the proper depth, you pulled off him and gave him a look, spreading your legs more and placing your hands on the floor.

"(Y/N)?" He asked and you simply opened your mouth wide, tongue out.

"Fuck." He practically growled and he adjusted your jaw by the chin and then he slid in. Keeping your teeth covered was a little difficult with his girth, but you managed. You could focus on that while he did all the movement. He had noticed what you were doing and made sure not to go too deep but every so often so you could still breathe. Your gag reflex was pretty much gone at that point for several different reasons, but with his size (and the piercing) you let out a small gag every once and a while. Hoshi's hands dug into your hair as he used your mouth, very quiet but high-pitched moans flowing out. Feeling him twitch, you knew he was close, and he almost pulled out. While part of him wanted to see your face covered, he much preferred it when you grabbed the back of his thighs and buried him completely in your throat.

"Oh, fuck." He groaned, throwing his head back as he came. You moaned at the feeling yourself and the vibration rolled his eyes back. When he was done, you swallowed to make sure everything went down and he pulled out fully, still half-hard. Licking your lips sensually, he huffed and reached down to lift you up under your arms. You yelped at the east to which he does this, and he literally tossed you onto the bed. He grabbed the fastener of your breast band; as he roughly pulled it open and off, the motion flipped you over onto your stomach. He was manhandling you with such ease. Hoshi moved your braid out of the way and started to lay seething kisses along your spine and over your shoulders. His hand came under you and ran down your stomach till the tips of his fingers reached the waistband of your leggings. He pulled your waist up, his now fully hard cock wedged between the cleft of your ass. You were definitely leaking through the fabric. Placing a final kiss on your shoulder, his hand hooked into your bottoms, and he tugged hard. You flipped over once again and as Hoshi dragged the last of your clothes off, he also tugged you to the foot of the bed. Before you could get your bearings, his hands gripped your thighs, tight, and pressed your legs open. You knew you would have bruises there in the morning and his hot breath on your core made your hips seize.

"W-wait-!" You gasped as his tongue licked a hot stripe up to your clit. You had never had this done before, just never really cared to. It was something new for sure and it was almost too much. The slight cold of the ball piercing his tongue made you flinch. You could feel hip lips curl into a smirk against you at this and caught him looking up at you. The sight was overwhelming, and he sucked hard on your clit, you head slamming back into the bed.

"You taste amazing." He groaned against your skin. His hands moved from your thighs, and he wrapped his arms around your legs and buried in deeper. The hold he had on you prevented almost all movement and your upper body squirmed to compensate. Hoshi's tongue seemed like it shouldn't be as long as it was, nor as strong. The piercing was brushing right against your entrance and hit your clit over and over. He was like a man starved, dehydrated, and he was sucking your soul out.

"Ah!" You almost screamed when he came back to your clit and your orgasm hit you, hard. It was stronger than you had ever experienced and lasted much longer. He groaned against you, his continued tongue movements dragging it out. When it finally calmed down, he pulled away as the overstimulation began to sting. The man let you catch your breath and when you were able to open your eyes to look at him and he was drenched.

"Oh my god!" You gasped and he just laughed, wiping his mouth and sucking everything else off his hand and fingers.

"You ever squirted before?" He asked and you shook your head, mortified.

"It’s okay, pretty girl, that was sexy." His smile was too cute for what he just did to you.

"You need a minute?" He asked and you rested back again with a nod. Delicately, instead of what he was doing before, he picked you up and shifted you higher up the bed. His lips came back to yours, gentle at first and growing heated again. There was something about his kisses, they alone made your head swim. Was it him or his skill? The tongue piercing? Who knows? As he felt your body become less tense, his arms wrapped around you and tilted your hips up so he could grind against you. You were still somewhat sensitive so even just the slight friction was so good. Already knowing this from when he was straining your jaw, you knew that his cock was going to stretch you so good. The sting would be so worth it. It had been a long time since anyone filled you up and no one had ever as much as you knew Hoshi was going to.

"You ready, princess?" He finally let your tongue go and you could not form a thought to make words, so you nodded. He smirked and the head poked at your entrance. As he eased in, the sting was more intense than you thought it would be, but so, so good. The stretch wasn't the only thing that took your breath away. That gosh darn piercing perfectly hit your clit and rubbing against your walls as eased in. At least he was self-aware of his size because he went slow, but knew he wasn't hurting you. Your hard exhales were tinged with a moan, nearly imperceptible. He was big, you knew part of it was because you were quite small, but his cock was impressive on its own.

"So tight." He grunted, grinding into you and your clit throbbed.

"J-just give me a sec." You gripped his shoulders, breathing through the delicious stretch. It felt incredible despite the slight pain. After you sat for a bit, he shifted some and then moved slowly, hiking your leg up over his elbow and he went even deeper.

"Fuck!" You moaned, your head tossed back, and you almost came again right then.

"You okay?" He chuckled some, he could tell by how you clenched that it felt good, not that it hurt. That fucking piercing brushed right against your sweet spot. Hoshi had already ruined you for any other man, and he hadn't even moved.

"Ready?" he asked, massaging your hip. You nodded and the hand on your hip tightened its grip, and his arm hiked your leg up higher. He barely pulled out, maybe an inch, then his hips snapped, and you came.

"Ohgodohgodohgod." He grunted as your walls clenched him tight and he was growing smug at the pleasure he was wreaking on you. In truth though, he was trying really hard not to cum already himself. He knew he would have some time before he could again given he had already came, but it had been a while. However, every other time he had waited this long, he could go for many, many rounds. If he could, he would keep you in his bed and in his hold for the rest of the day. He wanted to make it so you couldn't walk by the time he could bring you to the outpost. Honestly, he wanted to make it, so you never wanted to leave. When your orgasm died down, he waited a bit longer, you laid limp in his arms.

"You're gonna have to do all the work now." You told him with a tired giggle, like he wasn't already doing that. He smirked, notched your other leg up over his arm, then proceeded to fold your legs up to your chest. He pressed your thighs down with his hands, forming more bruises and you prepared yourself. His next thrust was almost hard enough (it seemed) to dislodge a kidney. It knocked the wind out of you and your sensitive skin burned. You were in for a ride. His thrusts were not even as hard as they could be, you knew. Hoshi only pulled his cock halfway out before he was buried as deep as he could go. After every thrust, he would grind down into your clit, the metal ball inside rubbing your g-spot. Your moans were getting harder to contain, you almost wanted to scream. Drool pooled out of the sides of your mouth; your entire body was on fire.

"Don't hold back, baby girl, let me hear you." He grunted out, his thrusts slowing but no less deep. Finally getting permission to be loud, you whined, and he unfolded you and led you to wrap your legs around his waist. Up on his knees, he positioned you to rest your lower back on his thighs and he rolled his hips to snap his cock into you over and over. The new position let that stupid piece of metal scrape perfectly against your walls, the head of his dick probably bruising your cervix. You were ruined, no thoughts in your head. You were letting out slurring moans of his name and pleas for…you weren't even sure at this point. He had fucked you stupid.

"(Y/N), pretty girl, where can I cum?" His thrusts had gotten more erratic, he wasn't able to hold back anymore.

"I-inside." You moaned, able to form a complete thought.

"Yeah?"

"Please." You keened and this sent him over the edge. Getting as deep as he could, he swallowed your moan, sliding his tongue back in your mouth, painting your insides white. The hot sensation gave you another orgasm, not nearly as strong though, and it was a relief. As the spurts of cum stopped, he pulled away from your mouth and he  chuckled at the fucked-out look you had.

"I'll let you rest, sweet, but then I'm going to fill you up again."

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[scary-grace]

Enough to Go By (Chapter 5) - a Shigaraki x f!Reader fic

Your best friend vanished on the same night his family was murdered, and even though the world forgot about him, you never did. When a chance encounter brings you back into contact with Shimura Tenko, you'll do anything to make sure you don't lose him again. Keep his secrets? Sure. Aid the League of Villains? Of course. Sacrifice everything? You would - but as the battle between the League of Villains and hero society unfolds, it becomes clear that everything is far more than you or anyone else imagined it would be. (cross-posted to Ao3)

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8

Chapter 5

You end up on a rooftop, you and Tenko and Kurogiri. Tenko has a pair of binoculars, and he lets you look through them before you have a chance to ask what he’s looking for. “We’re in Hosu,” he says. “The current location of the Hero Killer.”

“Are you going to fight him?”

“I’m doing what you said.”

You can’t remember what you said, except for your stupid joke. “Making him unfuckable?”

Tenko snickers, and somewhere behind you, Kurogiri does the same – which is extra weird. “No. Putting us back in the headlines.”

“Oh.” You don’t like this. “I’m not a strategist. You shouldn’t listen to me.”

“Why?” Tenko gives you a weird look. “You’re not stupid. Your ideas aren’t any worse than mine.”

“I don’t want you to get mad at me if it goes wrong,” you say. “I’ve heard you get mad at Kurogiri.”

Kurogiri chuckles. “That’s different,” he says. “Shigaraki Tomura. Tell her why it’s different.”

“Shut up,” Tenko says. He put the hand back over his face once he let go of your hand, but he’s turning red around it. Again. “Kurogiri’s not my sidekick. I don’t have to listen to him.”

“You don’t have to listen to me, either,” you say. “I don’t know anything about being – this.”

“You understand them better than I do,” Tenko says. He gestures at the expanse of Hosu before you. “What would it take to make you stop trusting heroes?”

You already don’t trust heroes very much. What would it take to move people like your parents or your siblings, who live in the other Japan, to where you are? “To see them choose wrong.”

Tenko gives you a curious look. “What do you mean?”

“Heroes can’t save everybody. They can’t be everywhere. They can’t be there all the time. But nobody ever thinks that the heroes won’t choose to save them,” you explain. “If you wanted to shake things up, you’d have to make it so the heroes choose wrong. For everybody to see.”

Tenko’s eyes light up, and the smile on his face this time looks less like your friend’s and more like the villain he’s become. “Then we’re in the right place,” he says. “This city is crawling with heroes looking for Stain. Let’s put them in a bind. Kurogiri, bring the Nomu. All of them.”

“Nomu?” you squeak, even as multiple portals open around you. “You have more than one?”

“We have lots. Sensei only gave me three.” Tenko gestures proudly at the monsters emerging from the portals. Everything about them looks like they’ve been put together wrong, from their staring eyes to their featureless faces to their pasty skin that smells like rot. The news reports about the attack on UA were clear about one thing – the Nomu that faced off against All Might was fast and extremely strong. “What do you think?”

One passes close to you and you cringe away, closer to Tenko. “They’re awful.”

“Exactly,” Tenko says. He stares down at the city, an expression on his face that’s somehow grim and vicious at once. “Let’s see what the rest of them think.”

The Nomus crawl down the sides of the building and vanish into the city. Tenko hasn’t given them orders, and neither has Kurogiri. You have questions – a lot of questions – but you’re not sure what it’s safe to ask. You’re Tenko’s sidekick, but that doesn’t mean his plans are yours to comment on. It feels weird to keep quiet, too. You and Tenko used to get in trouble for talking in class because you never ran out of things to talk about.

“You don’t look weird.”

You cough. “What?”

“You don’t look weird,” Tenko says again. You look at him, surprised, and find him looking straight ahead, peering through the binoculars. “I should have let you fix my shoulder the rest of the way.”

“What did you end up doing with it?” You reach over and part the cut fabric on his shoulder, wincing as you get a look at the bandaging job. “Next time, just let me finish.”

“Can you fix the rest of it?”

“I can’t do more stitches when it’s been open this long,” you say. Tenko grimaces but doesn’t swear at you. “There’s a chance it’ll get infected. If it does –”

“I’ll send Kurogiri to find you.”

“Tell him to give me a heads-up instead of just snatching me. I might need to grab antibiotics and I don’t want to make two trips.”

Tenko nods like this makes sense, which it does, except for the context. You’re standing here on the roof of a building in a city that’s already facing one villainous threat, while your childhood best friend turned aspiring supervillain has just released another – on your advice, no less. You try to rationalize it. Hosu is crawling with heroes, like Tenko said. If they’re good heroes, they’ll divert their attention to protecting the civilians. Heroes fighting Nomus will get Tenko the headlines he wants for the League of Villains, and if nobody gets hurt aside from the heroes who signed up for the job –

You need to be careful with that line of thinking. With that line of thinking, you could excuse what happened to the students during the attack on UA. “Can I ask you something?” you say, and Tenko nods. “Why did you go after the students?”

“I wasn’t after them. The point was All Might.”

“But you brought all those other villains,” you say. “On the news they said that Kurogiri moved the kids all over the training facility so the villains could kill them. And –”

You’re thinking of something else you heard, from Kazuo – that Tenko tried to kill at least three students directly, and All Might’s arrival was the only thing that stopped him. “He was supposed to be there from the beginning,” Tenko says. “All Might. Dividing the students up was supposed to distract him. Split his focus so he’d be more vulnerable to Nomu.”

You don’t know what you were expecting him to say, but it wasn’t that. “Those villains were weak,” Tenko continues. “The brats could deal with them on their own. It would have taken All Might two seconds. But two seconds is all we would have needed.”

“So it was – strategy.”

“Yeah.” Tenko lowers his binoculars, glances at you. “Do you believe me?”

The words leave your mouth before you can think better of them. “I’d believe you more if I could see you.”

Tenko was in the process of looking away. Now he glances back, and you can tell he’s startled, even through the fingers of the hand. You’re not sure what the hands are for. When he attacked the USJ, he was wearing multiple sets, but usually he only wears Father around you. You haven’t asked him to remove the hand before – only asked him where it was when he wasn’t wearing it, and when you think it over, you can’t see any commonalities between the times when it’s off and the times when it’s on. Maybe it’s the kind of thing you can ask about now that you’re Tenko’s sidekick again.

Tenko grips the binoculars one-handed, reaching up to remove the hand with the other. “The brats weren’t the real target,” he says.

“But you still tried to kill three of them.”

“Yeah,” Tenko says, like it doesn’t matter, without care – and without malice. “They were right there, and I thought All Might wasn’t coming. Everybody had to see how he failed again.”

Again? You’re not the biggest All Might fan, but you don’t remember hearing about All Might failing to save children who were being held hostage. In fact, when All Might has to prioritize, he saves children first. Tenko is watching you now. “Do you believe me?”

“I believe you,” you say, and you see his shoulders relax. “You’re not a very good liar.”

He never was. When you were trying to get away with things as children, you did the talking. Tenko’s job was to stay quiet and not make eye contact with whichever adult was questioning the two of you. No matter how desperate he was not to get caught, a few seconds of eye contact was enough to break him. In the present, Tenko smiles slightly. “Lucky I’ve got you.”

You like seeing him smile, and you’ve seen it twice tonight. The knot in your chest relaxes, only to tighten again as a chorus of screams rise from the city below. Tenko lifts his binoculars eagerly and you twist your hands together, trying to contain your unease. You have your best friend. He wants you with him – his sidekick, just like you used to be. You still know how to make him smile. And he’s a villain, the kind of villain who, when his plan to kill All Might looked like it wouldn’t pan out, decided to kill three children instead. What are you doing here?

More screams from below. You wonder how many civilians are being hurt, how many heroes are protecting them versus chasing Stain. You know there’s a free clinic branch in Hosu, one that’s open overnight just like yours is. They’ll be busy tonight. At least you won’t have to worry about them treating injured villains as well as civilians.

Or will they? What are the Nomus, exactly? Where did they come from? Is that the kind of question you’re allowed to ask Tenko now that you’re friends again? “Um,” you start, but he doesn’t look at you, just keeps peering through the binoculars. Sometimes he focuses so hard it’s like his ears stop working. You remember that from when you were kids. “Tenko?”

He still doesn’t answer. You reach out, touch his shoulder, and he startles so badly that he drops the binoculars. If he grabs them with all five fingers, they’ll disintegrate. You catch them for him, since it’s your fault, and pass them back once he’s ready. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”

“It’s – fine.” Tenko’s shoulder is tense beneath your hand. You’re still touching him, and you shouldn’t be. You pull your hand back. “What is it?”

“The Nomu,” you say hesitantly. “What are they?”

It’s quiet for a second. “Shigaraki Tomura,” Kurogiri warns. “You should not –”

“She won’t tell,” Tenko says without looking at him. He hasn’t put the hand back over his face. “They’re – I guess you could call them zombies. They’re made from bodies. Usually two or three bodies, and three or four quirk factors. It’s usually the same quirk factors. Shock absorption, regeneration, speed. I don’t care if you touch me.”

You’re too busy trying to wrap your head around the fact that somebody’s figured out how to raise the dead to catch the last thing. It takes you a second to get to it, and even then, you have to ask a clarifying question. “You don’t care? Or you don’t mind?”

“I don’t mind.”

Something is wrong with you. Something is really wrong with you that you’re more interested in why Tenko doesn’t mind if you touch him than in the fact that Tenko has multiple zombies at his disposal to turn loose on unsuspecting heroes and civilians. You try to focus. “Where do the bodies come from?”

“I don’t know,” Tenko says. He’s frowning slightly. A moment later, he puts the hand back on his face – but before you can decide if it’s because he’s mad at you, he hands you the binoculars. “Look.”

You look through them. You’re looking in the wrong spot, and after a few seconds of trying to give you directions, Tenko gives up and just covers your hands with his, moving you in the right direction. His index fingers are lifted, protecting you from his quirk. You see what he wanted you to look at quickly enough – heroes facing off against the Nomus. Endeavor facing off against the Nomus. It looks like the heroes chose right.

You can’t deny that it’s a relief. The civilians will always be your priority, and even if almost everyone has a quirk, most of those quirks are useless when it comes to defending against zombies with multiple quirks, and they’re banned from using them anyway. But you have the sense that Tenko’s not pleased, and when you look at him, you see him scowling behind the hand. “They’re making it look too easy,” he complains.

“These Nomu were not as strong as the Nomu from USJ,” Kurogiri says. “You were made aware, Shigaraki Tomura.”

“These heroes aren’t as strong as All Might,” Tenko snaps in response. “Master set me up – again –”

You spot something through the binoculars. Something Tenko needs to see. You push them back into his hands. “Look at that.”

Tenko’s still scowling, but he lifts the binoculars to peer through them. A second later he startles. Even without the binoculars, you can see a dark shape in distant flight over the city, something clutched in its claws. You don’t know who the Nomu grabbed, or where it’s taking them, but Tenko can’t fail to be pleased with that. Can he?

He can. A moment later he swears. “Fucking Hero Killer –”

Your heart sinks. “What happened?”

“He killed it. To save some hero brat.” Tenko’s binoculars are crumbling in his hand. You wonder if he even notices. “Fucking Hero Killer. Fuck!”

You’re pretty sure that’s not the end of the story. The Hero Killer saved a hero, after claiming that there’s only one true hero, and it’s All Might? You slide your phone out of your pocket, clear a bunch of notifications from your friends’ group chat, and navigate to Twitter. Somebody’s got to be reporting on this live, and sure enough, you find “Hero Killer” trending, plus a livestream of Stain’s arrest. He’s getting arrested, and with at least twenty murders under his belt, there’s no way he’s getting out of Tartarus in this lifetime. You touch Tenko’s shoulder again – after all, he said it was fine – and speak quietly. “Hey.”

“What?”

He won’t look at you. “Look at this,” you say instead, holding out your phone. “The heroes got him.”

“So?”

“So that’s it for him,” you say. “He’s going to prison for the rest of his life. All Might’s definitely not going to fuck him now.”

It’s quiet for a second, aside from a wheeze emanating from somewhere behind the two of you. It’s still weird to hear Kurogiri laugh. You don’t even know if he has lungs. Beside you, Tenko’s doing everything in his power to hang onto his scowl, and it’s not working very well. “Is that the only joke you know?”

You feel a surge of relief. “I’ll stop using it when you stop laughing at it.”

You hear the sound of helicopter blades in the distance, growing closer. Tenko can hear it, too. “Kurogiri, let’s go. We’re done here.”

You barely have a second to wonder where you’re headed before the black mist wells up, and you’re not entirely surprised to find yourself back in the bar. Kurogiri’s behind it already. Tenko’s sitting at it, the chair next to his kicked outwards. As you watch, Kurogiri sets two glasses down and lifts an unopened bottle of champagne. He opens it, pouring first Tenko’s glass, then the glass in front of the empty chair.

Tenko glances over his shoulder, spots you, and gestures impatiently at the chair. You sit down next to him and study the glass of champagne. Tenko’s already chugging his, but he stops halfway and glances at you. “Why aren’t you drinking it?”

You could lie, but you don’t want to. “I watched him pour it, and I don’t think you’d drug me. But I still have to be careful.”

Tenko doesn’t look offended. Instead he swaps glasses with you, and Kurogiri makes a discontented noise. “She doesn’t want to drink your backwash, Tomura. Even if you did brush your teeth before we left.”

“Shut up,” Tenko snaps at him. He’s turning red again. You look down into your new glass, trying not to laugh. “I brush my teeth all the time. You’re not special.”

That one gets you. You start laughing, and Kurogiri makes that weird wheezing sound. You’re starting to realize that unlike the villain you met earlier today, who was all over the place, Kurogiri’s got two distinct aspects – one that’s more formal, more severe, and another that’s significantly more relaxed. The second one sounds younger, too, and the impression only grows stronger when Kurogiri speaks again. “If you drink someone else’s backwash, it’s like making out with them indirectly.”

“No it isn’t! I didn’t ask you!”

Tenko is bright red and sputtering, and Kurogiri’s yellow eyes are crinkling, almost the way a person’s would. It occurs to you what this aspect of Kurogiri reminds you of – a sibling. You teased your younger siblings the exact same way, when you could get away with it. Well aware that you’re making some kind of statement about the whole thing, you pick up the glass that used to be Tenko’s and take a small sip. It doesn’t taste like anything but champagne.

When you look up, you find Tenko and Kurogiri watching you. Staring, more accurately – Tenko’s jaw is dropped. You will your face not to flush. “Thanks for switching with me. As long as you don’t pass out in the next half an hour, we’re good to go.”

“So you have to stay at least that long.”

He doesn’t want you to leave. You take another sip of champagne, giving yourself time to get under control. You don’t want Tenko to know how pleased you are with the thought, or how ambivalent you are at being pleased by it. “I guess I do.”

You stay for another hour and a half, reading over the news coverage of the Nomu attack and the Hero Killer’s capture until you can barely keep your eyes open. But you have an early morning, and even though Tenko complains that you have to go and makes fun of you for agreeing to take Yoshimi to her appointment, he doesn’t suggest that you back out of it. As Kurogiri is determining where to set a warp gate to send you back to Yokohama, you ask him why not.

Tenko gives you a weird look. “I know you,” he says. “That’s not who you are.”

He’s right. It isn’t. And as much as you’re pleased by the thought that your best friend still knows you after all these years, the disquiet lurking underneath it follows you home, curls up on your chest as you try to fall asleep. You’re not the kind of person who’d turn your back on a friend, or go back on your word once you’ve given it. But apparently you’re the kind of person who watches a villain turn monsters loose on innocent people and does absolutely nothing to stop him.

You might have made your choice already. You might have stepped over the line. But you have a bad feeling that you’ll be looking back over your shoulder at it until it’s vanished over the horizon, knowing you made the wrong call and knowing deep in your bones that there’s nothing else you could have done.

You’ve done basically nothing, but you still get the sense that you’re leading a double life. You comfort yourself with the thought that even if you went to the police, you’d have nothing useful to tell them. You don’t know where Tenko’s hideout is. You don’t know anything about who makes the Nomus or where they’re hidden. You don’t know anything about Kurogiri except that it seems like there are two personalities in there, and what Kazuo said about his quirk not being natural. You’re still not sure what Kazuo meant by that. Just like you’re not sure who Tenko’s master is.

The things you know would be absolutely useless to them. You know that Tenko recovered from his USJ injuries only to get immediately slashed up by Stain. You know Tenko likes champagne but can’t hold his liquor for shit. You know he’s smart and strategic, a lot more than the news gives him credit for, which is bad for them and probably also bad for you. You know he likes video games more than he did when he was a kid, but he likes you just as much as he did back then. You like him just as much, too. Probably too much.

You haven’t seen him again since that night in Hosu. You know he’ll send Kurogiri to find you if he needs you, and the fact that he doesn’t need you means he’s not getting hurt. But you’re watchful anyway. No matter where you’re walking, day or night, you find yourself keeping a close eye the shadows, watching from your peripheral vision in case one of them hides a warp gate. Or better yet, hides Tenko.

“Hypervigilance,” Kazuo remarks when he catches you at it, one partly cloudy day in early June. “A hallmark of traumatic stress. You could benefit from counseling.”

“It’s not wrong to be wary,” you say. “Things are more dangerous than they used to be. Don’t you feel it?”

“Another hallmark of PTSD. Persistent, negative cognitions about yourself, others, or the world, exemplified by statements like The world is more dangerous than it used to be.” Kazuo can be a real asshole sometimes. “But you’re correct. Crime rates have steadily increased as All Might’s taken a step back from the public eye.”

“You really think it’s All Might?” You glance sideways at Kazuo. “Not the League of Villains?”

“The League of Villains is a symptom,” Kazuo says. The two of you got to the park early; the rest of your friends are running late for your meetup. “I looked into the backgrounds of those who were captured in the attack on USJ. For the most part, I found petty crime – thievery, fleeing from the police, physical violence committed in the course of fleeing a crime scene or an altercation with heroes.”

That tracks with the kind of villains you run into at work. Most of them have done next to nothing to earn the title. “Looking back further,” Kazuo continues, “I found poverty, substance abuse, quirk-based discrimination, childhood trauma. There were some among the criminals at USJ who sought violence specifically and consistently from an early age, but for the majority of them, it was far from inevitable that they would become criminals. It could have been otherwise.”

Thinking about what’s going on with Tenko, you’ve gotten in the habit of playing devil’s advocate. “And that’s on All Might? One hero can’t fix poverty, or childhood trauma –”

“No, they cannot. But the presence of heroes gives everyone else an excuse not to try to fix anything,” Kazuo says. He gives you a look. “There will always be some villains. The existence of enough villains to allow your friend to form a League of them means that society is failing.”

“You’re not wrong,” you say. Usually when you admit that Kazuo’s right, he moves on, but this time he keeps looking at you. “What?”

“At least try to deny it,” Kazuo says, and you know what he’s talking about. “One day I won’t be the one asking.”

You know he’s right, but as much as Tenko occupies your thoughts, you don’t have much time to dwell on him on a daily basis. Yoshimi’s sick, cancer in her lymphatic system, and with her family out of the picture and her shitty boyfriend dumping her the second he found out, you and your friends are on overdrive trying to support her. Since you’re the only one who works in the field, a lot of the daily stuff is falling on you. You’ve been taking some shifts at the central clinic so you can check in on her while she’s there for treatments, and since the high school students are all studying for their medical assistant exams, you’ve been grabbing fill-in night shifts at your regular clinic at the same time. You’re getting four hours of sleep a night, if that.

You’re exhausted. So exhausted that, when the shadows in the corner of your vision turn out to be mist as you’re walking home from the park, you keep walking straight into Kurogiri’s warp gate without a second thought.

When you arrive in the bar, Kurogiri seems surprised to see you. “I thought you might run.”

“I’m too tired to run,” you say. “Does he need me?”

Kurogiri nods, as much as a person with mist for a head can nod. “Follow me.”

You balk when you realize where you’re headed. “He doesn’t want me in there.”

“He asked me to bring you there specifically,” Kurogiri says. “Don’t worry. He’s cleaned.”

“Oh.”

The door to Tenko’s room is open, but Kurogiri knocks anyway. “Shigaraki Tomura, the girl –”

“You’re here.” Tenko appears suddenly in the doorway, the hand clamped over his face. “That was fast. You didn’t run away?”

“What kind of sidekick runs when their boss calls?” You look Tenko over. “Kurogiri said you needed me. Are you hurt?”

“My shoulder’s a mess,” Tenko says, unconcerned. “I needed to talk to you. Come in.”

He takes a few steps back, leaving room for you to step through the door. The memory of how Tenko reacted last time is still fresh in your head, and based on Tenko’s expression, he can tell. “I cleaned it,” he says impatiently. “Come in.”

In spite of the fact that your best friends have usually been boys, you haven’t spent a lot of time in boys’ rooms. The ones you have been in aren’t exactly standard. Kazuo’s room looked like an interior design magazine spread even before his mind snapped, so minimalist it was hard to imagine anyone actually living there. Sho’s room looks more like a girl’s room than yours does. Tenko’s room back when you were kids just looked like a kid’s room. Like how you would have wanted your room to look if you weren’t already sharing it with two siblings.

Tenko’s room, compared to the last time you saw it, is no longer filthy. You can see the floor, at least, and some rearranging has occurred. The desk and monitor setup has been shifted unceremoniously into one corner of the room, and on the wall where it previously sat is a flatscreen TV. You can see that it’s hooked up to a router, as well as a cable or smart TV box, and there are a few consoles and controllers strewn around nearby. Across the room from the TV is a coffee table. And behind that, a bed.

You gesture at it. “Was this here before?”

Tenko doesn’t answer. “Kurogiri, go,” he orders, and you glance over your shoulder just in time to see Kurogiri vanish from the doorway. “Sit down.”

You sit down on one end of the bed and Tenko sits on the other. He slides a collection of games across the coffee table to you. “I like all of these. You can pick which one we play first.”

“I’m not good at games.”

“I’ll teach you what you need to know,” Tenko says. He pushes the games at you again. “Pick.”

You start sorting through the games, searching in vain for any title you know while you try to shift the subject back into reasonable territory. “You said something was wrong with your shoulder. Can I look at it?”

“It’s not that bad.”

“You said it was a mess,” you point out. “Let me see.”

“Pick a game and then you can see it.”

You see exactly one title you know – Call of Duty. You hold it up and Tenko frowns. “We can play that one for a bit. In co-op mode. But after that –”

“Show me your arm.”

Tenko scowls, but he moves from the other end of the bed until he’s within reach. He’s wearing a short-sleeved shirt, oversized to the point where you can draw the neckline aside and reveal the wound. It’s clear that the stitches have been disturbed. The wound site is red and angry-looking and you can see scratches around it. There should be a scab on the part that Tenko wouldn’t let you stitch, but it’s clearly been peeled away. It’s either infected already or about to be, and either way, the healing process is going slower than it should be. A surge of frustration sweeps over you.

You look up at Tenko and find him watching you, unrepentant. “What?”

“You were scratching this.”

“It itched,” Tenko says. He gives you a weird look. “You never said not to.”

“I didn’t think I had to say not to scratch your open wounds.” Your frustration seeps into your tone. “You should have sent Kurogiri to get me as soon as the swelling started.”

“I tried. You’re always busy.” Tenko’s voice takes on the quality of a sneer. “Kurogiri’s been watching you for three days. You’re at that other clinic with that girl all the time.”

He didn’t use to be like this. He didn’t use to be jealous. “She has cancer. She needs someone –”

“She has other friends and doctors and parents and some loser boyfriend somewhere,” Tenko says. You start to argue that Yoshimi doesn’t have a boyfriend, courtesy of said boyfriend being a loser, but Tenko cuts you off. “She has lots of people. I only have you.”

He has Kurogiri, his master, the doctor, the Nomu – or does he? Shigaraki Tomura has those people. Tenko only has you. You peel your eyes from the angry mess Tenko’s wound has become and look up at him. “If I had known you needed me, I’d have found a way to be here. You’re my best friend.”

“I know. I –” Tenko breaks off, frustrated. “I didn’t mess with it so you’d come back.”

“I didn’t think that,” you say. “I know you scratch sometimes. It seems like less than before.”

“Only when you’re here.” Tenko shifts in his seat. You’re about to tell him he shouldn’t worry about that when he speaks again. “I feel different when you’re here. Can you fix it?”

“I’ll need to take the stitches out and clean it before I bandage it up again, but yes.” You look around for the medical supplies and Tenko pries open a drawer full of them. “Then we can play the game.”

“I can’t believe you like Call of Duty.”

“It’s just the only one I recognize,” you admit, and Tenko laughs. You like hearing him laugh. “Get ready to lose all respect for me. You might want a better sidekick.”

“I don’t need a better sidekick,” Tenko says. “I’m good enough for both of us.”

Warmth floods through you, pooling in your cheeks and your chest and the pit of your stomach. He remembers. You pull on a pair of gloves and open the suture kit. The sooner you rebandage his wound, the sooner you can play a game with your best friend for the first time since you were kids.

But after you’ve taken out the stitches, as you’re bandaging his shoulder, you notice something. The other times you’ve seen Tenko and treated his wounds, he’s been wearing long sleeves, and when you’ve cut them to get a look at the injuries, you haven’t paid much attention to whatever else might be underneath them. Now, with his arms exposed by design, you can see things you didn’t before. Tenko’s always scratched. After fifteen years of scratching he’d naturally have scars. But when the two of you were kids, you never saw him scratch his forearms. And you’ve never seen scratches look so uniform, so evenly spaced. You’ve seen things that look like that before. They weren’t scratches.

You look up and find Tenko looking at you already. “Sensei had me do them. So I’d be stronger,” he says. Your heart seizes in your chest. “Not in a while, though. When I got strong enough he let me stop.”

“That’s messed up.” You’ve been careful not to speak against Tenko’s master, not when you know so little about him, but you can’t hold back this time. “Hurting yourself doesn’t make you stronger. It just makes you hurt.”

“What would you know about it?”

“Lots. I see it every day.”

Tenko gives you a look that tells you just how little he thinks of whatever you’ve seen, and you lose patience. You let go of his arm and pull up the sleeve of your own short-sleeve shirt. “I don’t mean at work.”

Tenko’s jaw drops behind the hand. “Who made you do that?”

“Nobody made me. I did it myself, which makes me a lot dumber than you,” you say. Tenko’s lines are even. Yours are jagged, because you were angry or crying or hurrying to finish up before one of your siblings needed the bathroom or your mom came back to keep arguing with you. “Was your master trying to make you stronger? Or was he trying to teach you not to show when something hurts?”

Based on the way Tenko’s red eyes flash, you know you’ve hit the nail on the head. “What were you trying to do, then? When you were being dumber than me?”

You were being really dumb. So dumb that it’s embarrassing to talk about. “It’s a reset, biologically. Injuries force the body to release endorphins, which make you feel better for a little bit. There was a while where I had trouble controlling my temper. It helped me do that. Or at least not show it.”

“A while,” Tenko repeats. “You should have had trouble the entire fucking time.”

“I did,” you admit after a second. “You used to tell me it wasn’t okay, what my family was like. It took a while to believe you.”

Half the reason you didn’t believe Tenko was because you knew his family was messed up, too. No matter what else your dad did, he didn’t scream at you or lock you outside without dinner. But as you got older, you realized why your parents didn’t do that: They needed you too much. They needed your help with the extra kids they shouldn’t have had, and the older you got, the more it started to infuriate you.

You saw evidence of it everywhere, in places it was and places it wasn’t. They didn’t wipe your memory because they cared that you were upset about your missing friend, they did it because they needed you to be quiet and helpful instead of sad. They didn’t let you choose your favorite snack or go to a birthday party once in a blue moon because it was the fair thing to do, they did it so you wouldn’t complain about all the times you weren’t allowed to. They promised they’d make it up to you every time they shorted you in favor of your siblings with quirks, hoping the apology would make you forget. By the time you were fourteen, you weren’t forgetting anymore.

Tenko’s watching you from behind the hand, but you don’t want to be watched right now. You focus on placing the bandage. Maybe if you do that, you can pretend this isn’t happening. “What happened?” Tenko asks. “With your family.”

“Nothing,” you say. Nothing like what happened to his. “They’re out there. They call me on my birthday. Every so often they ask me for money. Do you really want to talk about this?”

Tenko doesn’t follow up. On that, at least. Three of his fingers brush across your exposed upper arm and it takes every ounce of self-control you have not to jump out of your skin. “These are old, right?”

“Not as old as yours,” you say. “They aren’t recent, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“I stopped, so you should, too.” Tenko’s palm covers your upper arm for a moment, then lifts away. “It wouldn’t kill you to control your temper less, anyway. When was the last time you got really mad?”

“Three days ago. Yoshimi’s boyfriend ditched her, so I called him and lit his ass up.”

“Sure you did. I bet you never raised your voice,” Tenko says. You look up, offended. “You probably sounded like some kind of evil shrink, telling him what a piece of shit he is and how you understand that he can’t help being an asshole but it would probably be best for everybody if he took a long walk off a short ledge –”

He’s mimicking the soft, semi-conciliatory tone you use when you’re trying to de-escalate a situation, looking at you from behind the hand with a smirk on his face. You’d get mad, except it’s a pretty accurate imitation, and you like the thought that he knows you well enough to pick on you like this. “I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about getting really mad. Really losing control. When’s the last time you did that?”

You can’t remember. You shrug helplessly. Tenko heaves an exaggerated sigh. “It’s a good thing we’re playing Call of Duty next. If getting your ass kicked in a video game can’t wind you up, nothing will.”

It’s been a while since you played an actual video game. You were bad at it then, and you’re really bad at it now. Tenko makes you play a round in single-player mode to see what you’re good at and where you’re weak, and he spends the entire time laughing so hard that you’re worried he’s going to dislocate a rib or fall off the couch. It takes you way too long to hide away from the enemies onscreen long enough to ask Tenko a question. “What’s so funny? I know I’m not doing it right –”

“You’re just –” Tenko wheezes, then makes an effort to get it together. “Up here in the corner of your display is the map. The dot is where you are. And then everything in front of you is your point of view. That’s why it’s called a first-person shooter.”

“I know,” you say. “The display –”

“You control that on this side of the controller. And that’s where your trigger is, too. The other side handles motion,” Tenko says. His shoulders are twitching, like they do when he’s trying to hold in his laughter. “I’ll watch the map for you. Just go where I tell you to go.”

“Okay.” You adjust your grip on the controller and prepare to be humiliated.

Tenko directs you to move straight forward, which you do. Then you make a left turn and jump up on a crate for a better firing angle, at which point someone shoots at you. “Shoot back,” Tenko orders. You press the trigger. “Nice work. Okay, now jump off the crate and –”

You jump off the crate as requested, but then you get your buttons jumbled, and instead of running in the direction Tenko told you to run, you find yourself bumping into the wall repeatedly with your viewpoint stuck directly upwards. “Tenko –”

Tenko is howling with laughter again. The hand dislodges and falls off his face, and you see his eyes crinkling at the corners, his smile just a little too big. Some girls in your class said his smile was creepy, but you always liked it. You liked that you always knew which of his smiles were faked and which weren’t. “I’m stuck,” you say, and he laughs even harder. “What did I do?”

“If you were doing what your character is doing right now, you’d be doing this.” Tenko mimics pointing a gun straight up at the sky, and suddenly you get why he’s laughing. “You’ve been running around like this –”

No wonder you keep running into walls. Now you’re laughing, too. “You weren’t kidding,” Tenko says, shaking his head. “You really are terrible at it.”

You set the controller aside and wipe your eyes. “You sure you don’t want a different sidekick?”

“I have the sidekick I want.” Tenko glances at you, almost shyly. “We’ll need allies, though. I want you to meet them.”

Your stomach lurches. “Do you have them already?”

“One of the brokers is bringing them. He finds them through the black market.” Tenko sets the controller back down in your hands, adjusting your fingers to the right buttons. Then he unpauses the game. “Once I have them all – go right. No, your other right. Once I have them all, I want you to meet them. I need them to work together, and to stay calm instead of fighting each other. You’re good at getting people to do that. Watch out, there are – nice work.”

He’s giving you a strange look. “What?” you ask. “I didn’t get killed yet.”

“You’re better at shooting people than running around. That’s weird.” Tenko’s expression stays odd for another moment; then he grins. “Works for me, though. As long as you don’t mess with your viewpoint too much, we can play together.”

“Works for me.” You’re still going to be pretty useless, but at least you can protect Tenko’s back. That’s more than you’d be able to do in a real fight. The thought kicks off a flood of anxiety, and before you can stop yourself, you find yourself speaking out loud. “Tenko –”

He pauses the game mid-switch to co-op mode. “Yeah?”

“I don’t know if I can help you the way you need me to,” you say. He gives you a skeptical look. “Medical stuff is one thing. I’m good at that. If your allies need help with that, I’ll help them, too. But the rest of it, I’m not – planning, getting people to follow you –”

“I can do that part. But villains fight all the time. Like kids do,” Tenko says. He smiles slightly. “If you can handle me, they’ll be easy for you.”

“But I know you,” you say. “It’s different.”

“So you’ll get to know them, too.” Tenko’s confident, just like you remember him being. Once he’s decided how something will be, it’s hard to shake him. “Come on. Let’s clear this level.”

It’s an easy level, or you think it’s supposed to be. You spend most of your time running backwards, keeping one eye on the map so you don’t lose track of Tenko and the other eye out for enemies of any kind. On reflection, you do think your accuracy with shooting is a little weird. Between this level and the next one, you rack up a decent number of kills. “You’re already getting better,” Tenko says, grinning. “I bet we can beat this thing if we keep playing.”

“I’d like that,” you say – but you’re still thinking about Tenko’s semi-crazy idea that you meet a bunch of villains for crowd control. “About the allies – you trust me, but they won’t have any reason to. I’m still a civilian.”

“You’ll need a disguise,” Tenko says, which wasn’t what you were hoping he’d say. “Something that hides your face. “If any of them have a problem with you, they can take it up with me.”

You don’t know what to say to that. The idea of Tenko getting into it with other villains over you makes you feel sick. “I don’t want you to get hurt because of me. I don’t want you to get hurt at all. You’re my best friend.”

“I’m not your boss,” Tenko says, which doesn’t make any sense. Your confusion must show on your face, because Tenko elaborates. “Earlier. You said sidekicks don’t run from their bosses, but I’m not your boss. I don’t want to be your boss. I want –”

He breaks off, clearly struggling with what to say. There’s a patchy flush coming up in his cheeks, and you see his hand rise, twitch toward his neck – then fall back. “I don’t want to be your boss,” he says again, looking everywhere but into your eyes. “I want – you should –”

“Shigaraki Tomura.” Kurogiri’s voice issues from behind you, and you and Tenko both jump. “Your master wishes to speak with you. You are overdue.”

“Shit,” Tenko mutters. His grip on the controller tightens, and you lift it out of his hands before all five fingers can touch it. “Where’s – I need –”

“Here.” You pick up the hand from the floor and pass it to him, feeling a chill go down your spine as you touch it. “Go talk to him. It’s okay.”

“I’m late. It isn’t.” Tenko settles the hand back over his face. His free hand rises again, clawing at the side of his neck, and something about the image, the situation, feels uncomfortably familiar to you. “I’ll send Kurogiri to get you again soon. For another date.”

“This was a date?”

“Of course it was.” Tenko gets up, heads for the door. “Remember. Find a disguise. I’ll see you soon.”

He’s gone, and a second later, so are you – Kurogiri drops you in an alley off the street you were walking on. He lingers for a moment, and the question explodes out of you. “It was a date?”

“I told him it’s not a date unless both people know it’s a date.” Kurogiri looks vaguely uncomfortable, and his voice is in the other register – the one that sounds more like an older brother than a servant. “Next time I’ll tell him I can’t find you.”

“Don’t do that,” you say at once. Even reeling like you are now, you’re sure that you want to see Tenko again. “Just – warn me, if you can. If it’s a date or something else.”

“I can do that.” Kurogiri vanishes, but his voice lingers for a moment more. “You protect him, too.”

What does that mean? Maybe it means that Kurogiri sees you like he sees himself – a protector of Shigaraki Tomura, although if there’s anyone you’re trying to protect, it’s Shimura Tenko, your best friend. Your best friend, who’s in a lot more trouble than you thought he was.

You’re standing in the middle of an alley. You need to get moving before someone peeks in here and starts asking questions. You slide your phone out of your pocket, raise it to your ear, and lower it as you step back out into the flow of traffic on the sidewalk, like you were taking a call that just ended. Your apartment’s not far away, so you’ll get there, and then you can think about all of this. The villains – the date – the scars on Tenko’s arm that look too much like yours – the scratching that didn’t start until after the hand covered his face. The hand he calls Father.

And that’s when you realize what it reminded you of, what happened when Kurogiri told Tenko his master was waiting for him. He was himself when you spoke to him, even after he put the hand back over his face – right down to how he reacted when his master called for him. Because his reaction looked the same as his reaction to his father calling for him when the two of you were kids.

You had a bad feeling about Tenko’s master, and now it’s worse. You have a bad feeling about what your involvement with Tenko means now, because he wants you to back him up when it comes to dealing with other villains, to take the de-escalation and conflict resolution skills you learned the hard way and put them to use keeping a band of villains together under Tenko’s control. You have a bad feeling because Tenko’s told you to find a disguise, to hide your identity like the villain you aren’t. You aren’t a villain. Are you?

Maybe you aren’t a villain – yet, a voice in your head whispers, you aren’t a villain yet – but there’s something wrong with you. There must be. Because knowing all that, knowing that you’re getting drawn further into Tenko’s plans, doesn’t do a thing to dampen your excitement at the thought that he wants to go on dates with you. That he likes you. That your best friend, who you always thought you’d have developed a crush on if the two of you had gotten to grow up together, might feel the same about you as you do about him.

[kooktrash]

summer bummer, baby | jeon jungkook [teaser] NOW POSTED

summary: summertime is supposed to be a time of easy living and that’s what you were hoping for when you signed up for an extra credit program cleaning up the shores of Busan and staying in a luxurious beach house. what you didn’t sign up for was to live with Jungkook, a failed talking stage who you’ve avoided for the past few months. despite having a slight disliking toward each other you find yourselves be by pulled back into each other throughout your stay. the only question that remains is if this is just going to be a summer thing or something more.

TWO PART SERIES

➢ genre/au: enemies to lovers/beach read. jungkook x y/n [afab she/her]

➢ 795 words

warnings: soft e2l. smüt with plot. beach foreplay. handsy sunscreen scenes. oral [f and m]. händjob. cünnilingus. no protection. jk’s pull out game is strong. missionary. riding. heavy makeout and groping. jealous jk. jealous y/n. jk is a soft tsundere [v antisocial and cold except to y/n —mostly]. love bites. jk almost gets into a fight over y/n. y/n meets jk’s family.

Jungkook was able to ignore you for the most part. Aside from the first day at work he hasn’t really seen you too much. You both have only worked twice since then and because you’re on a set rotation to make sure everyone works the same amount, you haven’t seen each other that much.

Not that he minds, it’s just something he’s noticed.

He doesn’t pay attention to everything you do but you’ve got a weird relationship, alright? Of course you’ve spent the last couple of months avoiding each other but there’s a very valid reason for that.

The first time the two of you talked, you completely hit it off. You had been assigned to do a project together in the same class as the one where you joined this summer camp for. You met up in the library mostly, but you had this light banter that would go on between you that was clearly flirty, it wasn’t until after presenting your research on the destruction of the Ozone layer that you really started texting.

You were talking all the time and sometimes the conversations would drift a little too far into dating territory and you just realized you were different in some ways. Jungkook likes texting all the time whereas you could go hours without responding. He’s been in about the same amount of relationships as you and you both had been in that hook up only phase. When you did decide to try going on a date the first time he flaked but it wasn’t intentional. He had to work that night and had completely forgotten that when he agreed on a date.

The second time, you both sort of flaked after attempting to reschedule the first one. He’s not sure if you had gotten fed up with trying to find an available time to get drinks but it just wasn’t working out. You both had finally decided on a Saturday but when the day came neither of you said anything. He had been waiting for you to reach out first since he had been blowing up your phone about it the night before. You had been waiting for him to reach out first and confirm the plans since he’s the one who canceled last time. Clearly neither one of you put in the effort to make it happen so it never did.

Then, the final time you attempted to get drinks together was about three weeks later. After the second time you cut back on how much you talked but when you got back to talking like normal and set a date you ended up blowing him off completely. You didn’t even show up so clearly he was bothered by that enough to ask you about it.

You had a tiny argument over it and it just made you both realize that if it was this hard to go one just one date then you clearly weren’t working for each other and that pursuing anything past a friendship wasn’t going to happen. Of course that then made the friendship itself awkward and in the end you avoided each other.

Now he’s stuck in a house with other guys with one who seems to be clearly interested in knowing more about you.

“I’m just saying,” Jisoo said as all four guys sat outside on the deck facing the beach, “Y/n is hot, like mysterious hot since she doesn’t talk to anyone.”

“She talks to Jungkook,” Hoseok pointed out, making Jungkook roll his eyes.

“That’s because we have class together,” Jungkook said, trying not to give out too much information. He doesn’t need any of them asking questions. Besides, it’s only been a week, how do they expect you to be cool with everyone right away? He’s not defending you, he’s just being realistic, plus Hoseok is still going based on what he saw the first day of work.

“Really?” Jisoo asked, “Are you guys friends? I haven’t seen you guys talk? Did you guys date or something? It seems like you hate each other, tell me something about her.”

“Jesus,” Jimin laughed, “Obsessed much?”

Jisoo groaned, “I can’t help it. She’s so hot, have you seen her in those bikinis?”

Jungkook felt his jaw clench but he hid the action behind a glass bottle of beer as he muttered, “You’re not her type.”

“What?” Jisoo asked, clearly catching what he said. Jungkook just looked him over with a shrug, “I said you’re not her type.”

“So who is?”

Me.

::.

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[ganondoodle]

(idk if anyone wants to keep hearing my opinions on totk book stuff but-)

apparently it says that rauru DID have kids, multiple even, which yeah... is kinda necessary for zelda to even be connected to them so much so that sonia can SENSE a blood connection (which, even with all the excuses with magic, is just a little too far for me to suspend my disbelief bc its over, OVER, ten thousand years worth of generations that seperate her from them that one lil touch of the hand can sense that (feels more like an attempt to make you care about them or .. see them as zeldas "better" parents just bc they exchange a few nice words, i never got the feeling they were 'better' parents and its also kinda disrespectful to her actual parents, like sure rhoam wasnt the best but i wouldnt call rauru better just bc he was polite)- i could see maybe the light power of hylia or sth but since its the coolest dude that ever lived rauru now that had it which still doesnt make sense and makes me unreasonably annoyed and she can sense BOTH of their powers in her? nah) the fact theres NOTHING about them in the game itself is just so ... no way they planned any of this

i dont think theres anything they can do or say that wont make be believe they either

are making it up alla 'fix it in post' mentality trying to hastily explain stuff the game never bothers to do to try and appease fans or let it appear as if they thought about it at all

something went really REALLY wrong during development, which kinda seems likely given how the game turned out (im sorry i cannot let go, its not just the writing, the game design too and how little was changed in the map while being so damn expensive, i dont know how people dont feel scammed q_q)

given that they (allegedly) spent the last entire year of development on polish (where??? where????? huh??? like it would make it more understandable (EXCEPT for the price) if there was alot of trouble, which was also bc it got delayed and ... turned out like this, but they dont want to say it, especially given their reputation, with that quote i have heard way too many times 'a delayed game blah blah') i just??

are they just gonna go and do it like they did with kashiwa (kass)? "they uuuh where flying around the whole time ony cool sonau tech maschines, you just dont see or hear from them ooooorrr they were uuuuh out of the country at the time" (sending invitations to other continents to join their glorious kingdom ;) )

(bet they are also gonna say they did all the stuff like ... moving the shrines around (lol?) and lifting the islands up into the sky- which is still weird bc ... didnt they also say they were living in the sky before coming to the surface?? so where?? did they park all their islands on the surface and the mystery kids had the keys so they had to repark them back into the sky after they returned off camera?? xD also why are the islands so different as an environment if they where from the surface? like even the STONE up there is different- and if they were first in the sky then on the surface and the nback in the sky .. why is there not a single yellow tree or grass in the past- you cant really argue that it changed bc they were up there so long bc .. nothing else changed, the suddendly and totally always there sonau buildings are largely in prime condition, only some slightly moldy, and what we see of the glorious past looks barely any different from the present, aside from like ... some standard trees shuffled, no castle yet and that glowy uwu filter DESPITE that stupidly long time frame between it)

[nightwngz]

LIPS RED ENOUGH TO KILL A BIRD !

tim drake x fem!oc

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀. . . smut. porn with plot. age gap (the original character is older for 13 years, but Tim is legal age), fem dominance, enemies to lovers, sexual tension, the original character is a villain, probably this may have a part two. Teasing, oral sex, riding, dirty talk, fingering and hair pulling.

𝗰𝗼𝗽𝘆𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁. . . no copying of my work is allowed. Free translation is allowed as long as I am credited.

𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗴𝘂𝗮𝗴𝗲. . . as I said in my other posts, English is not my first language. I have tried to make corrections with the translator, but as you all know, it is prone to making mistakes, so I apologize in advance for any mistakes or if anything sounds weird.

𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲… I had this idea a long time ago and I want to share it with you. On the other hand, I have a few pending requests, but I'm working on all of them, so don't worry. Enjoy, and I hope you like it. 🌷

She was probably the most attractive woman he had ever met.

Don't get him wrong, he could admire the beauty of a female villain without being completely attracted to her. But he swore he had never met anyone like Adeline, known to the Gotham Mafia as "The Queen of Hearts," so fierce and domineering that she could easily take your head off.

Batman had been in contact with her since Dick Grayson was Robin, and Tim had heard stories of her iconic fame throughout his training. She was even described as a woman who used her physical attractiveness as a method of hunting and getting what she wanted.

It was just a rumor. Until Tim Drake finally met her.

She was dangerous. Neither the Falcone family, nor Maroni, nor even Two-Face dared engage in illegal activity in the territories she protected. She ran every criminal organization in Gotham, and the rest were probably just her subjects. Because of this, she has always had an extreme rivalry with Batman, as they competed to be the most feared figures in the city.

And besides, Adeline was fascinated by the hunt, but Batman would never be her prey, but unfortunately the little bird would not have the same luck as the bat.

After a period of apparent inactivity by the Queen of Hearts, during which she was actually plotting in secret, the current Robin was forced to relinquish his mantle to Damian Wayne. Now an independent vigilante, he called himself Red Robin. It was at this moment that the Queen began to play her cards again and regain her influence as the most prominent figure in Gotham's criminal underworld.

These were reasons enough for Red Robin to be forced to investigate her.

It didn't take him long to realize that she was an incredibly smart woman. She managed every part of her plan to perfection. Thanks to old files, he was even able to learn that she built her own empire all by herself, without anyone lifting a finger to help her. She had easily earned her place in Gotham's underworld.

She and her clan were a cancer that Tim Drake had to eradicate from Gotham before it was too late.

Adeline returned to her penthouse that night, and Red Robin waited for her in the shadows of her living room. The apartment was so spacious that only an incredibly paranoid person would think someone was hiding there; she was probably one of those people.

She approached the long leather sofa, her red stiletto heels echoing on the floor with each step. The room was still dark and Tim stood at the far end, admiring her curvaceous, graceful silhouette as she sat down and lit a cigarette.

— Do you smoke? — She asked, aware of the vigilante's presence.

He did not answer.

— Mm... my doctor told me to stop. But it's the only way to calm my anxiety. Strange, isn't it? How many packs of cigars does a Mafia leader have to smoke to be completely calm?

Her voice was just like her: attractive, haughty, and most of all, sharp as a razor or even a playing card.

— You killed five men on the docks last week. I want to know why — He ordered, as if she was somehow obligated to give him answers.

However, she smiled with incredible superiority. Despite the distance, Tim could tell that her lips were painted with a deep red lipstick. She had an exaggerated obsession with the color red, but he couldn't blame her, considering how good it looked on her.

— You know very well, dear little bird, that everything in this world is governed by two things — She said, and started to walk towards the standing figure of Tim, who was standing on the mat in the room. —Love and money... and believe it or not, I am very selective about the things I lend, so you can already guess what happens when someone in this city owes me money for a long time. Bills are bills, Boy Wonder.

Tim was completely silent as soon as he heard the woman say his former nickname. How could she know that he was the former Robin?

— You're wrong about the nickname, Queen. I have no relationship with Robin, let alone Batman.

She approached without taking the smile off her face for a moment. She circled the man's figure, touching his hair with her gloved hand, teasing him.

— Don't try to fool me, Red Robin. I know everything there is to know in this city, which is everything. I know about you, how you were replaced. You were neither the first nor the last Robin Batman had, with the incredibly handsome Nightwing being the first and the red-hooded mercenary the second. If you lift a stone in this city, I know it. I have informants on so many sides, you probably won't know when you meet one. So don't try to play my game with me, I made it, and that's why I always win.

Tim felt like he was being devoured by Adeline's withering gaze every second. He felt cornered, contained, disappointed that he had underestimated her and believed that she didn't know everything about him, his past and his family.

— So... you probably know that I have been investigating you. I've been watching your every move for months.

She moved closer, so close that Tim could have sworn he felt her lipstick on his ear, and whispered:

— On the rooftops, in the windows of the buildings in front of this penthouse, everywhere I go, nothing escapes me, little bird. And although I've always loved the hunt, I must admit that this cat-and-mouse game you're playing is turning me on.

He wasn't quite sure how he had left her apartment that night without being attacked by her henchmen or her guards, but even though she was aware of it, Tim continued to watch her from a distance. He came to believe that the Queen of Hearts was so used to being followed that she didn't even flinch when she learned that she was a victim of it.

She went all over the city, from that fancy bar in Chinatown to certain abandoned businesses in the Warehouse District and finally to the same address as always: her apartment on the east side of the city.

From the moment Tim saw her through the large window, sitting on her couch, he knew Adelaine was waiting for him. With those black eyes, she seemed to be inviting Red Robin to pay her a visit. And under no circumstances could Timothy Drake refuse.

Adeline was not surprised to see the black silhouette in the room again. It would be a lie to say that she had inadvertently neglected the security of her apartment; deep down, she knew that Red Robin was trained to overcome even the tightest security systems. After all, he had been trained by Batman.

— You disabled the alarms. — He said, walking slowly toward her. — Were you expecting visitors?

A mischievous smile lit her lips. He noticed that she looked even more stunning than the last time, even though she was alone in a silk robe and classic red polish on her nails, enjoying a bottle of wine. Without a doubt, she was dazzling.

— Honestly, I was just waiting for you — She admitted, leaving Tim perplexed. — Did you enjoy spying on me from the rooftops today, as usual? This time it was even adorable; no man had ever shown that level of interest in me before.

Red Robin was distracted when he noticed a brown folder on the coffee table that appeared to be a collection of files. Confidently, he picked up the folder, eager to discover its contents.

— What is this? — He asked, lifting the folder so that the distinguished woman could examine it.

— Open it and you will know. No fear, little bird.

As he opened the folder, Tim froze. It contained a detailed file on himself: Timothy Drake Wayne. The document covered his childhood, the death of his parents, his legal adoption by Bruce Wayne, his career as Robin and additional details about his current alias. Unable to react, he simply studied the contents in silence.

Tim placed the documents back on the coffee table and watched her in surprise. He had profoundly underestimated Adeline, even going so far as to think he might be able to surpass her in intelligence and strategy.

— Believe me, I was also surprised to discover that the most influential family of millionaires in the city dressed up as vigilantes and fought crime. — She confessed, her classic red lipstick smile sending shivers down the young man's spine. — Though I must admit I wasn't surprised to discover that Bruce Wayne's third son was my stalker bird, I expected nothing less from a man as formidable as he.

Slowly, she approached him and motioned for him to sit down. Tim felt himself tense, aware that Adeline knew his secret identity. Now it was up to her to decide whether or not to reveal it to the world. He was sure that Adeline would not keep such a revealing secret without getting something in return.

— What do you want from me? — He asked. He was sure that even if she revealed his identity, he would not give in to blackmail or make deals with the mafia.

— Nothing from you. — She replied, approaching him and resting her hand on his knee — What Red Robin or Tim Drake may have is of no interest or use to me. To reveal your identity would expose you to my enemies, and I do not wish to do that. There is, however, something I can offer you.

He was on the verge of despair, convinced that he would have to reject any offer she made. But Adeline was breathtaking. He couldn't help but desire her and wonder what it would be like to feel her red lips and smooth, manicured skin. Her exquisite perfume almost intoxicated him. He knew he was behaving badly and would regret it later, but he thought he should not give in under any circumstances.

The next thing he knew, she was straddling him. Despite his attempts to pull away, Tim's body would not follow the commands of his brain. Instead, she placed her hands on his bare thighs and he closed his eyes, allowing her to devour his neck, leaving marks that would probably last for days.

Her robe had slipped down, revealing red lace underwear that immediately caught Tim's attention. Accustomed to her perfectly clothed body, she looked even more sensual than usual, half naked.

— I... — He hesitated, struggling to control himself. — I shouldn't.

Adeline pulled her lips away from Tim's neck and looked up at him with her classic mischievous smile, although this time her lipstick had smudged a little.

— You shouldn't, but you want to. And we both know you won't be able to resist.

Fuck, she was right. In her presence, Tim felt himself questioning his own intelligence. For a moment he decided to let her be right. After all, as she had told him, the queen of hearts always wins at her own game.

He sealed his lips with hers in a passionate kiss, accepting that he could not resist his urges. He kissed her with the intensity of one who surrenders at the last moment, and she reciprocated with the same fervor, allowing her tongue to meet his.

Tim soon realized that she was in control of the situation. Although they were both on the bed and he was naked, she remained clothed and dominated the scene by being on top of him.

— Fuck, what a good boy — She whispered, leaning down to kiss his chest and trace the contours of his torso with her lips. Tim shivered with excitement as he felt the brush of Adeline's lips on his defined abs, and then her tongue sliding along the curve of his waist. — But too impatient, I see.

Tim quickly grabbed a pillow to cover his face and muffle his moans. At that moment, Adeline descended until she was in front of his thighs and saw his towering erection, dripping with pre-cum.

A smile lit up her face. Gently, she began to caress him, instantly sensing the pleasure Tim was getting from her caresses and the woman's graceful movements. He moaned intensely against the fabric of the pillow and moved instinctively to pull her closer.

— Fuck, fuck... — He groaned, biting his lip.

Tim looked up and watched as Adeline stroked his hair, her eyes fixed on his body. Her hands moved gently down his cock, even going so far as to gently circle the head. From her perspective, the image was stunning; she had never been with a man in his twenties who looked so incredibly attractive. Despite his disheveled hair and the beads of sweat that accentuated his toned abs, he looked magnificent.

— Fuck, baby bird, you couldn't look hotter. — She told him, leaving short kisses on both sides of his inner thighs. — I want to devour you.

Immediately, Tim brought his hands up to Adeline's hair as she worked on his erection. Through her underwear, he could see the obvious wetness that showed her arousal. Meanwhile, she watched him enjoy her action and noticed the veins in his arms stand out as he held her hair.

Although she was an expert at it, she found it difficult to get something that big into her mouth without running the risk of gagging. Although the idea turned her on, she would not allow Tim to fuck her mouth. She was in charge, so things would be done her way.

— I'm going to cum. — He moaned loudly.

Since discovering her sexual attraction, she had found that she had a weakness for male moans. Tim's moans, however, were different; they were so hot that they completely captivated her.

— Hang in there like a big boy. — She said, pulling away for a moment to look at him — You'll have to fill me up later.

Tim was overcome with despair. He didn't know how long he could keep his cock in the woman's mouth before he climaxed and spurted down her throat.

He began to recall unpleasant moments in his life, hoping to distract himself and extend the time. After barely two minutes, however, he realized that he couldn't hold out much longer and that if she was going to fuck him, she should start now.

— Fuck me now, please. — He begged, almost crying. — I don't think I can resist much longer.

She paused for a moment and pulled away to remove the rest of her clothes. Then she approached him again and straddled him.

Tim watched her and was shocked to see her naked and realize how unbelievable it was that a woman like her was with him. Especially considering that although he was of age, she probably still thought of him as a young man.

— All right, baby bird. You've done surprisingly well. And for your good fortune, I usually reward those who behave.

Without thinking too much about it, she moved gracefully on his hips, allowing him to fill her completely. In a way, it was she who was enjoying herself, moving her hips to enjoy herself and at the same time to see him enjoying as well.

Tim struggled inside, aware that she was in control, but wanting to please her at the same time. He considered sliding his fingers to her pussy, and to his relief, Adeline moved to allow his touch.

As he had suspected, she was completely wet. Her clit responded immediately to his caresses, causing her to tremble with pleasure, which made her moan softly. Meanwhile, Tim caressed her throbbing clit with his fingers while Adeline's hips continued to move on him.

— Who assured you that keeping your identity secret would be free, little bird?

[sparky-is-spiders]

Jonelias Week Day 1 (Which is definitely today I swear), for the prompt "No Powers AU"

This one... maybe got away from me. This is actually only the first half of what I've written so far, and probably the first third overall! I do plan to post this to Ao3 at some point (although I suspect I'll need to do a lengthy round of editing first lmao). It's some very self-indulgent nonsense, which is a lot of what I write, but now it's getting put in the main tags of a ship during said ship's event week. So. It may also be a little bit "aromantic dude tries to figure out what having a crush is supposed to be like." Also a lot of "dude who took Principals of Accounting once pretending it knows what office work is like." Anyway, quick warning before we begin, and the rest will be under the read-more:

Stalking (played for laughs) for most of the fic.

Just. A weird amount of obsession.

Ok that should be it I think. Fic under the cut.

Jon's new boss was, quite possibly, the most boring man in the world. He wore the same outfit every day (pale dress shirt with dark unpatterned tie and gray slacks and matching suit jacket). The only personal effect in his entire office was a potted plant on the windowsill (some sort of succulent, and definitely fake). He always arrived to work exactly half an hour early and left exactly half an hour late. The only hobby he appeared to show any interest in was scheduling, which he seemed to find both deeply engaging and remarkably irritating. In fact, he was apparently so opposed to the idea of mixing his work with his personal life that he might as well not have existed beyond the walls of their office. Jon had never been more fascinated by anyone else in his entire life.

It stared with the transfer to the accounting department. Elias had met with him personally to get him acclimated to his new role. He had been blandly polite, and blandly handsome, and Jon had stopped listening to him about five minutes into their conversation. It was probably bad form, really. The software Elias was droning on and on about sounded like it was about to become a central feature of his days. He really should've been paying attention to it. Instead, he pretended to make eye contact while zeroing in on the top of Bouchard's forehead (a very useful trick, really) and became inordinately focused on the small lock of hair that had fallen across it. It was terribly distracting, and Jon had wondered how he hadn't noticed it. And then he wondered how it had come to be there. And then he had built up an entire story involving a murder, an illicit affair with the assistant director of marketing, and the potted succulent. And then he had noticed Bouchard eying him with what could've been suspicion or amusement or irritation or nothing whatsoever, and had been forced to rapidly pretend to care about their company's bad debt expense policy. Bouchard had indulged him, and had spoken with the calm authority of someone who knew what they were talking about, and had even managed to avoid being overtly condescending (a feat forever out of Jon's reach). At the end he had shaken Jon's hand (with a nice, firm grip), and had told him "I'm looking forward to working with you, I'm sure you'll make a wonderful member of our team." Jon had left that meeting with a mind shrouded in a fog of boredom and a faint sensation of warmth which he decided was best attributed to curiosity and left otherwise unexamined. Over the next few weeks, Jon had tried to subtly inquire into Bouchard's life. At the time, he had been naively under the impression that surely he must have let slip something about his life; some odd quirk or funny story or harmless bit of information which could justify Jon's blooming curiosity. Unfortunately; "He lives in Chelsea, I'm pretty sure?" (Sasha) "He's currently in a meeting. Honestly Jon, you'll be better off just sending an email. Now can I please get back to work?" (Rosie, probably lying about the meeting) "He actually lives here in the office. Set up a cozy little home away from home in one of the storage closets and sneaks out at night to raid the canteen. And he's having an affair with the assistant director of marketing." (Tim, definitely lying (but maybe a mind reader? Also, full of brilliant ideas for places Jon could maybe set up a cot whenever he needs to stay overnight)) Clearly, Jon would have to take matters into his own hands if he wanted answers. That was fine. It could be his own private little research project.

Jon liked to think that the entire thing had actually been quite reasonable, and that he had acted within the bounds of their pre-established relationship as employee and supervisor. Surely any rational person had to realize that nobody could possibly be that uninteresting. Anyone would be curious as to what dark secrets Bouchard his behind his well-tailored suits and polite, professional demeanor. … perhaps most rational persons would not meticulously record the movements, behavior, and daily appearance of their colleague in a discreet notebook (with annotations, color-coding, and graphs where appropriate), but Jon had always prided himself on his dedication to research and understanding. So far Jon had collected frustratingly little data. If Bouchard was hiding anything, it wasn't apparent from his schedule (see pages 8-13, figure 2.b), his eating habits (see page 22), or his lone plant (see page five, figure 1.c). His breaks did seem specially timed to avoid other people (and he appeared not to engage in many social behaviors generally), but he never acted irritated or otherwise unhappy to encounter one of his subordinates, so Jon wasn't entirely sure if it was deliberate avoidance or simple coincidence. Really, the only truly odd thing about him was his inexplicable interest in Jon. That very morning, for example, Bouchard had stopped by his cubicle for a fifteen minute discussion on the upcoming Annual Team Luncheon, an event Jon had never attended before (due to an annual migraine which coincidentally always happened to occur on the exact date of the luncheon), which Jon did not plan to attend, and which honestly sounded like some sort of violation of the Geneva Convention. The topic itself was not especially odd (small talk was an archaic tradition which had stubbornly clung on in every workplace Jon had ever set foot in), but Bouchard's low propensity for inter-office socialization combined with the fact that he had both chosen Jon specifically as his conversational partner was… highly suspicious. Most people who encountered Jon inevitably concluded that he was more effort than he was worth (an attitude Jon mostly appreciated).

And of course, there had also been their interaction two days ago, when Elias had paused briefly to inquire as to whether Jon would be staying late, and what he was working on, and if he might perhaps consider heading home soon because there was only so much overtime they could pay him. Or on Friday, when he had managed to hold two separate conversations with Jon where very little was said. Honestly, Jon somewhat suspected that Elias had spoken to him more in the past few weeks than he had spoken to any of their colleagues for the entire time Jon had been there to observe him. Most of Jon's notes were now dedicated to their interactions. From his cot in the unused storage room (which was indeed a good place to stay overnight, thank you Tim), he could jot down everything he recalled about their interaction; it had begun at 8:32 and had concluded at 8:47; the weather was warm and slightly humid, although the office interior remained at a comfortable 21 °C. Bouchard's shirt had been a nice, cool gray, which complemented the silver of his eyes. Jon (who had been busy digging for his favorite pen (the ink was a lovely deep green color, and it was usually kept on the left side of the top desk drawer, and Jon had no idea where else it could have possibly gone)) had settled on "irritation" as his tone, which Bouchard either had not noticed or had not cared enough to acknowledge. He had easily dominated the conversation, and Jon could admit in the sanctity of his research journal that his voice had been soothing enough to cool away some of Jon's annoyance. He wrote his conclusion: Subject behaved near-identically in tone, posture, body language, and apparent mood as he has in all previous communications. Subject displayed no strong thoughts or opinions on subject of discussion nor conversational partner. Interaction was pleasant but slightly dull, no new information discovered. It was almost exactly the same as every previous conclusion. Jon had to admit, so many months with so little progress was… discouraging. He shifted on the narrow mattress and winced when his movements aggravated his backache (which was surely unrelated to his frequent occupancy of the cot). It was becoming more and more apparent that the only possible solution was to do some actual, direct investigation. His first idea (break into Bouchard's office) seemed a tad far (also, he didn't know how to pick locks). His second idea (follow him home) seemed a stretch further than the previous one, and was perhaps best saved as a last resort. His third idea (something something computers? (perhaps "idea" was a bit generous)) would almost certainly require Sasha, who would have questions Jon couldn't answer. He flipped idly through his notes, half-skimming, half-thinking. It was only when his gaze landed on figure 2.b, Weekly Schedule of E. Bouchard, that he actually came up with something reasonable. Something actionable.

[aioliravioli-69]

Detective Noir AU

Alright, this au has been sitting around, waiting for me to finish it but chances are, I never will :((

So instead, I'll just post what I have so far

This was inspired by that one comment on the au post the author made(at this point you could consider me a stalker for the amount of hours I've scrolled through her feed💀)

First things first, none other than our main character himself, Detective Hollow!

I made him the detective in this one mainly because I was basing it off of the theory that if there was no heroine the keyholder would simply become the hero instead(don't remember where I read this but I'm guessing it was the webtoon comment section).

I also my have just really wanted to draw him in an overcoat

gonna be honest, I did little to no research going into this AU, the thing I most tried to learn about was the femme fatale so I could get a good view on how to design Buddy

Speaking of the femme fatale:

Seems like someone got caught in the spotlight!

And before you ask, yes, those are pants. Weird ones, but pants nonetheless. I swear, I hate lighting when it's from the front. Frontal lighting can go fuck itself. Please ignore the little help lines I put in

Honestly, Buddy's outfit was probably the hardest part of this one. I wanted him to look slutty, but I didn't want to make it TOO slutty, but I feel like I may have added WAYY too many folds in his pantsuit and I kinda messed up on the overcoat lol. The diamond on his chest was inspired by the diamond on the villainess key more than anything and I tried to incorporate that into his gloves too.

Anyway, have some potential outfit sketches I made:

the two I thought might come off as too slutty and

the ultimate winner of the outfit ideas

As you can see the diamond chest window and fur coat were a mut in this outfit and I'm pretty happy with the end result

Y'all know how the femme fatale usually has to seduce the main character a.k.a. the detective?

Well, y'all know me so have an extra just for you <33

But I'm not done just yet!

Remember how I said that I made Chase the hero because of the lack of a heroine in the story? Well...

I did some more surface level research(and I mean very surface level) and decided to adapt the trope of the girl-next-door archetype for him!!

Don't think it suits him, since they usually just sit pretty and wait for the detective to notice them, but they do have badass roles once in a while and I live for those!!!

The one Chase has taken on doesn't though sadly :')

I decided to go with Charlie Hollow for this one because it sounded more like something the timid and 'pure'(yuck I know, but sadly film noir movies often prop up comparisons between the femme fatale and the girl-next-door, this being one of them) girl next door would have

Overall I tried to make this one as cutesy as possible because, why not lol

Lastly(I apologise, I made this in a rush because I was running out of motivation)

The distance between Buddy and the detective sure did close QUICK-

Originally I was planning on adding Deacon as a police officer and now that I think about it I could technically fit Prunella in here as well, but I just don't have any willpower left to keep this thing alive

My art blocks been acting up recently and I can't even pick up the pencil without immediately wanting to put it down :((

I wish I could have continued this and maybe I will someday, but until then this'll just stay in my drafts

[lnkedmyheart]

can you name every time in which dazai has expressed care for chuuya?

Sure, I can try. Dazai has a unique brand of care and it shows less as the more obvious show of affection and more as an interest in people. Lets go chronologically

Dazai's irritation at the meeting with the sheep in 15. He has imo already started his own weird bonding ritual with Chuuya by that point and wants him as his personal friend, his dog in Dazai lingo cause he is a moron. He gets irked at the way Shirase, and by extension the sheep, make demands of Chuuya. That being said, this is still early and he more or less just uses this info to exploit for later.

Dazai's fascination from the GSS squad vs Chuuya fight develops into Dazai wanting to keep living. And I think that is some kind of care because Dazai legit is vibing with the guy by this point. Him wanting Chuuya to be assigned to him and not Koyou and printing out newsletters about him etc all seem to point towards some weird way of wanting to be on talking terms with him.

In stormbringer Dazai carrying Chuuya all the way across the city to the Old World so he can see Albatross and hear his final words is very important to me.

Dazai's growing agitation at them not getting to Chuuya in time during his capture. Its not as noticeable but he was uncharacteristically insistent.

Dazai's insistence on Chuuya's humanity in general.

Dazai's entire plan in sb was so he could get his hands on details about Chuuya. Like he flat out admits that Mori and the mafia dont really matter to him here and Chuuya even understands that.

That one scene when Guivre first appears and Dazai whispers to Chuuya to not look. An underrated scene imo.

The very well known scene where Dazai gives Chuuya a genuine choice and was willing to put the entire city at risk because he believes Chuuya has a right to his humanity and past. Also him explicitly laying out everything in front of Chuuya.

Obviously him catching him as he fell and holding him or whatever. But also another underrated scene where when Chuuya feels lost at the care shown to his person by Adam in the epilogue Dazai has the softest most fond reaction.

In the day I picked up Dazai he talks about Chuuya to Oda. I think its cute.

Onto dragon head now: Dazai completely flipping from completely unbothered about the war to deciding enough was enough when Chuuya calls him out with a punch and is genuinely mad at him. He is very subdued throughout the manga panels. He doesn't evem tease him. Him quietly accepting that Chuuya needs to use corruption and despite him telling Dazai not to stop him he nullifies corruption by touching his face and then letting him rest on his lap and even puts his hat on his head. Hell Dazai's entire perception of events changes because of Chuuya, from making light of the colonel's death to angrily telling Shibusawa that he had crossed a line with that act. Also Dazai's "get shot and die" line is explained to be a code warning Chuuya of an incoming grenade.

Onto the manga timeline: Dazai is generally far nicer and more civil with Chuuya than any of the mafia members post defection. He gives Chuuya a choice with Lovecraft again, he is very gentle with Chuuya when nullifying corruption, not letting go of him till he knows Chuuya would be able to handle his own weight unlike with say Atsushi. He folds his clothes and brings his hat back. Note that the hat is very important to Chuuya.

Dead apple has Dazai's face when he touches Chuuya to nullify him and then holding him down post corruption. And the sheer trust he has in a Chuuya to follow through on a plan that was never discussed. And Chuuya's hat magically appearing in his line of sight when he leaves. Also you can't tell me he doesnt care when he makes that face.

Dazai's anger at Fyodor bringing Chuuya to Meursault is self explanatory, his bond being questioned is too but particularly his whole speech in 101 where he starts thinking back on their moments is proof enough that he genuinely cares about Chuuya in some weird obsessive way.

[thewulf]

Big Blue World || Joel Miller

Request: Can you do a Joel Miller x Franks Younger sister reader?? I haven't seen any fics with her. Maybe she's a bright ray of sunshine to Joel's grumpiness?... Read rest here

A/N: Wasn't planning on posting this first but inspiration struck and you've gotta take it! Hope you guys enjoy.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Y/N

Word Count: 9.4k+ (Another long one!)

TW: Talk of suicide, general TLOU warnings

One – Seven Years Post Outbreak: The Dinner

The first time you laid eyes on him was only a few years after you and Frank moved in with Bill. It was simple really. Both you and Frank fell into Bill’s trap ditch. You managed to break your ankle on the fall down. Panicked and sure death was in your immanent future you burst out into tears. You weren’t made for this kind of life. This impossibly hard life. You, Frank, and a group of nine others were venturing to the Boston QZ after your home was demolished. You’d been walking for what felt like months, you could really never be too sure.

It didn’t make sense how you of all people were one of the last surviving in the group. Often getting by with just the skin of your teeth your only saving grace being that you were quick. You could run for your life. That, and you had Frank. He was eight years older and the best big brother you could have ever dreamed of. Even pre-outbreak the two of you were thick as thieves plotting to take over the world. He saved your life more times than you could count. You hated it. Being weak and shit. You wanted to be better for Frank. You had to survive with him. He couldn’t do it alone either.

So, when you fell into Bill’s hole and screeched you were just thankful whatever it was would take you both out. Neither having to live in this sick world alone. To your pleasant surprise Bill not only let you stay but he knew how to fix your ankle properly, without having pain in the future. You were sure Bill and Frank fell in love that first night. You didn’t know how that all that worked but you were so happy that your brother found his happiness, his purpose.

Life slowly turned back to a weird fucked up new normal for the three of you. Bill and Frank fell madly in love with each other within a few months. They never excluded you though, making you feel as though you were meant to be here with them. You found it easy to pretend you were back in life pre-outbreak. Finding hobbies around town you got really into knitting and gardening. You just wanted to be seen as useful to Bill. He was kind enough to let you stay so you wanted, needed, to bring something to the table.

You were interrupted from your solace hearing the men arguing at the front of the house. So much for weeding. Being far too curious for your own good you listened in on the two of them as they bickered.

“Oh, fuck you!” Frank yelled rather dramatically.

“Hey! Would you stop?” You knew Bill was rolling his eyes at your brother’s antics. Whatever the hell he could be up to now.

“Do I ask for things ever? Why am I even saying that? This is for me. This is for the three of us!” Your brother yelled. You inched closer dying to know what this blow out was about. The two men could be so damn dramatic when they wanted to be.

“Who cares what they look like?” Bill continued. What the fuck were they on about? You could only wonder as you sat behind the tree near the front listening in.

“I do! Our home isn’t just our house. It’s everything around us!” Frank yelled again throwing his arms up in the air. Oh, he was on the beautification subject again. Frank wanted everything pretty, but Bill never let him. Resource management was key.

“Give me a fuckin’ break.” Bill returned your over dramatic brothers cries. Oops. You knew that was a mistake. Bill always tried to argue but Frank always won.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I forgot. I live in this world. You live in a psycho bunker where 9/11 was an inside job, and the government are all Nazi’s.” Your older brother seemed to calm down even though you knew he was downright mocking Bill.

“The government are all Nazi’s!” He boomed. You couldn’t help but to let out a silent laugh. You agreed with him of course. Frank just knew how to push his buttons.

“Well, yeah, now! But not then!” Frank defended, “I am asking for some paint and some gasoline for the lawn mower. That’s all. I’ll do everything else myself.”

“It is not man-“

Frank interrupted him clearly agitated. You were getting a full-on show now. You hated to admit it, but you loved when they had blow outs. It was your entertainment for the day, “If you say resource management so help me, I will run through one of your trip wires.”

“Okay, okay. Just tell me why.” Bill seemed to reason. Boo. You knew as soon as it calmed down the show was over. It was fun while it lasted. Standing slowly you were going to make your way back to the garden only to hear Frank continue.

“Paying attention to things. It’s how we show love.” You listened in again. What the hell was he talking about now? It sounded like bullshit, “This is my street too. Just let me love it the way I want to. And I’m fixing up some of the shops.”

Ohh, it just got juicy again.

“Woah, woah, woah.”

Frank rolled his eyes, “Not the stupid ones. Just the wine shop, and the furniture store. And the clothing boutique.”

“The boutique? Are we hosting formal garden patties now?”

“No!” Frank couldn’t help but to roll his eyes at the man. That was so like him, “But we are going to have friends.”

“Excuse me.”

“We’re going to make friends and we will invite them to visit.” Oh, hell yeah, this was getting good now. You could use some friends anyway. You prayed Frank won this battle with Bill.

“We don’t have friends Frank. We will never have friends. Because there are no friends to be had. Other than Y/N.” You grinned hearing that last bit thrown in. You loved that he always made sure to include you. You grew on him that’s for sure.

“Well, I’ve actually been talking to a nice woman on the radio.”

“You what?!” He screamed. Oh hell, Frank was in trouble now and he knew it. You watched as he darted to the front door ignoring Bill.

Bill turned right to you shaking his head. Busted, “I know you heard that whole thing. You’re not sneaky.”

You shrugged, “Who said I was trying to be?”

“You and your brother are going to fucking kill me.” He groaned making his way in to talk to Frank.

You only smiled as he departed. Bill had also grown on you.

Next thing you knew you were meeting the nice woman named Tess and her friend Joel. You couldn’t but to take your eyes off the man. He wasn’t like anything you’ve come across in Baltimore and now here. He was so freaking handsome. You hadn’t a clue how to handle it. It’d been years since you talked to another human let alone a beautiful man.

At dinner you made sure to look at anything but him, keeping your eyes locked on either Tess or Frank. Luckily Bill was his usual grumpy self after losing to Frank and kept his gun out and trained on the two strangers. You were so thankful he kept their attention instead of you.

“Can you not, please?” Frank sighed looking over to his boyfriend. You bit you lip trying to stifle the smile that threatening to spill over. They were always bickering. Like an old married couple. They couldn’t even hold it together in front of the guests.

“I’m the same way.” You heard Joel speak for the first time. He seemed to let Tess take the lead most of the time. Thankful you weren’t standing. You were sure your knees would be wobbly. He had that smooth southern drawl with a thick husky bite that’d draw just about anybody in. Fuck. You couldn’t have possibly been this horny to be thinking such things of a literal stranger. You had to reign yourself in quick.

“Oh, you’re a paranoid schizophrenic too?” Frank quickly chided in. You only leaned back rolling your eyes earning a quick glance from the handsome stranger.

“I’m not schizophrenic.” Bill sat there looking between everyone. That killed the whole mood. Great, just wonderful. The first real people you meet, and you’ve all ruined the chances of them coming back already.

Tess cleared her throat interrupting the silence, “Well, can I just say, gun aside, which I get,” She laughed but continued, “how nice this is to have a civilized meal in such a beautiful place? It’s been so long. I mean, I just, uh, I wanna thank you. Even if we don’t end up working together. I really needed this.”

“We are working together.” Frank cheers confidently. You only leaned forward smiling, “We are.” He looked at Bill who only looked horrifically apprehensive about this whole situation. Frank was pushing him beyond his limits.

Before you knew it Frank and Tess were walking inside giddily talking about something they chatted about on the radio. Leaving only you, Bill, and Joel alone. Great, the three mutes. You leaned back waiting. It wasn’t your place. This was for the big dogs, and you certainly weren’t one of them.

“If my uh, if mine brought strangers into our situation I wouldn’t be too happy either. But of all the people you could’ve found on the radio we’re actually decent people.” You leaned back further letting your mind wander as the two of them talked. You only prayed Bill wouldn’t drive him away completely.

You sighed as they left. Bill drove them out. You stayed a couple of feet behind and watched the two conversations unfold. You gave Tess a wave and smile before she was out. Joel didn’t bother turning around as he waved the group off. Leaving you with only a small frown. They’d be back soon enough. You were sure of it.

Two – Eleven Years Post Outbreak: The Supply Run

That familiar voice that you hadn’t heard in so long came from downstairs. Quickly, you ran down the steps to greet the now acquaintance that you wished would show up more often than he did.

“Joel! Tess!” You jumped down the last step only to be greeted with Joel and Bill, “Wait where’s Tess?” Fear ran through you. Did she get infected? Was she gone already? She was Frank’s only friend outside of here.

“Frank just took her to the boutique.” Bill grumbled sitting down in the chair at the dining table.

You let out the breath you were holding, “Good!” You clapped thankful that the worst hadn’t come over your somewhat friend. If you could use that word, “Maybe she’ll pick out some of the clothes I made.” You grinned knowing you just stocked the store up with your latest sweaters and hats. What else were you supposed to do with your time other than make way too much clothing that the three of you would never go through?

“You make clothes?” Joel asked seemingly interested in the conversation.

You beamed just happy he noticed you. He hardly noticed you before, only briefly talking to you each time they had come back. It seemed they stopped about once a year. Tess always giving Frank a heads up on the radio before the made the trek up north.

You wished you could get Joel to see you. But you were just Frank’s little naïve sister. That’s all you ever seemed to be. Not that you blamed him, he was right after all. You really were just Frank’s naïve little sister having way too much optimism for this cold world.

 You craved any attention Joel gave you. From the second you laid eyes onto him four years prior and every brief interaction each year since you were entranced by him. He was so strong and composed. Something so opposite of you. Someone so sure of himself every time he came around. And Jesus, look at the man. He was so damn attractive it nearly drove you mad. He only seemed to get more handsome each time he and Tess walked through those gates. You thought about him far too often. Far too often for somebody who saw you as Franks little sister.

“I did and do! There should be some that fit you if you want some yourself?” You gave him a hopeful smile. Maybe he’d accept?

Joel looked somewhat impressed? You couldn’t tell. It wasn’t a look you’ve seen from him before, “Yeah?”

“Mhmm.” You grinned, daring to take a step closer, “Bill’s even modeling my latest collection. Classic springtime.” You waited patiently for him to decide. You weren’t sure how to handle yourself if he decided to come with you. You’d literally dreamed of alone time with Joel and here was a chance at it… you didn’t think you were ready.

Bill huffed turning away. Because of course he did. Earning a brilliant scowl from you. Truth be told he held a lot of love for you in his heart too. Your constant reassurance and optimism grew on him over time, not that he’d ever dream of telling you. He wasn’t mushy. He could hardly handle you in your sober state. In your emotional one? He’d for sure go mad.

As if by a miracle Frank and Tess came barging in giggling about who knows what. Saving you from a too awkward encounter with both grumpy men. You couldn’t help but to smile at the Tess and Frank. They would have been friends’ pre-outbreak too. You could just tell. Two souls that connected so effortlessly.

 Joel noticed you watching them. He always noticed. He was always watching you when you weren’t watching him. He couldn’t help it. He was drawn to you, and he was really God damn tired of fighting it. Every time he came, he hoped he wouldn’t run into you. He wanted to but for his sanity’s sake he couldn’t run into you. But you always showed up. With that damn brilliant smile and cheerful greetings. Making him feel way too special. He craved it. He loved it.

“Y/N!” Tess came rushing over to you placing both hands on either of your shoulders, “You made these? These are actually good. They have designs in them and shit. I didn’t really believe Frank when he said you were good at it, but he was right. I’m impressed.”

You shrugged, “Well, when you have all the time in the world.”

That earned a chuckle out of the woman. She seemed so happy and relaxed here. A side Joel rarely saw. A side that was seemingly reserved for you and Frank. It made sense though, both of you were infectious. Both Joel and Tess let their usual stoic guard down around you both.

“Joel. Go now. Y/N will show you.” She ordered. So sure of herself. Something you so deeply admired about the slightly older woman. She lived that life. The rugged one. Yours was so damn peaceful compared to hers. A country club compared to the life she lived.

You nodded towards the door, “Come on, I’ll show you.” Not daring to betray Tess’s orders you nodded for him to hurry up.

He nodded. His mind was made up for him by Tess, “Alright. Lead the way.” He tried to look grumpy. He didn’t know how it was actually paying off though. Because he was way too damn excited to finally be alone with you.

You held the door open waiting for him to join you outside. You led the way a couple of steps in front of him. Tired of the silent walk you had to say something, “How’ve you been holding up Joel?”

He sped up a couple of steps taking that as an invitation to walk beside you. He had no God damn idea of how to act around you. He had a stupid big fat crush on you that Tess, and now Frank, knew about. He was sure that’s why she sent the two of you alone.

It happened slowly for Joel. Initially, he really only did see you as Frank’s little sister. You didn’t do much for him. But over time, over the shortest of visits he slowly started to look forward to seeing you bright shining face. You always greeted him with the happiest of smiles. Like it was the pre-outbreak world, like nothing was wrong. Tess picked up on it over time when he bugged her to visit with supplies. Claiming he needed to see Bill but always brining you up somehow.

Joel knew it was dangerous. Falling for someone in a world like this. Someone like you. You were just too pure for this world. He couldn’t see you outside of these chain link fences. He didn’t want to imagine you trying to survive out there. You didn’t deserve it. You deserved so much more.

“I’m okay. We’re okay. Getting by just fine. Couple supply runs here and there.” His accent came out strong the longer he was away from the QZ. The longer he was able to relax the thicker it came out.

“Good.” You nodded. You too had no idea how to talk to him. Coming from such separate worlds it was like your brain couldn’t fetch the words to converse with him. Which was really bad for you.

“And you?” He offered. He was trying. Something you hadn’t seen from the gruff man. You turned looking at his face as the setting sun seemed to hit all his angles just right. Eyes tracing every feature you soaked everything about him in.

“I’m decent.” You sighed knowing that was a terrible answer. So, you did what you did best and just started talking, “Been busy knitting a store up. Trying some new techniques in the garden I read from a 2001 Farmers Almanac. I think it’s working too. I’ve got a ton of cucumbers. I’ve gotta pickle them or they’ll go bad. Unless you guys want some?” You offered knowing you needed to stop before you babbled far too much. It was either way too much talking or stone-cold silence when it came with you and awkward conversations. And this was incredibly awkward.

He was giving you a different look. A much softer one. One that’s as if he’s seen you for the first time, “We’ll take some. But you’ve gotta pickle the rest. We’ll be back and then I’ll take some pickles. Deal?”

You giggled feeling your cheeks heat up as he kept his eyes locked with yours. You watched as you saw his eyes turn up slightly as small smile formed on his face. You had a feeling this was a very rare occurrence for Joel. Not often finding that smile. And you were right. It was terribly foreign to Joel, but you brought it out. Somehow, some way he felt a little lighter when you were there.

“Deal! We’ll have way too much for us anyway. The garden is getting a bit out of hand, but it keeps me busy.” You stopped pointing towards the building, “Here we are.”

He held his hand out, “Ladies first.”

“Course.” You smiled leading him in, “There should be some stuff over there that you might like. I’ve got some extra stuff in the back if you don’t like any of it.”

He nodded letting himself go and search. You sat back on the countertop that used to contain the cash register.

“You really made these?” You heard him before you saw him.

“The ones without the tags yeah!” You brought your legs up and sat with them crossed beneath you. Simply waiting on him to grab whatever he needed.

Before you knew it, he walked up to you holding a few sweaters and shirts, “Is it alright if I take these?”

You nodded, “Sure. I’ve got plenty more. It only takes a few hours to make these now. I’m afraid I’m going to run out of yarn.”

“I can get you some.” He replied without a hesitation.

“Yeah?”

“Sure. Consider it a trade. Next time I see you I’ll have some. What colors you want?”

You smiled a bright smile to him. You’ve grown so fond over the four years you’ve known each other. But it felt like you’d suddenly broke through to him. Whatever it was you were so thankful. This was a Joel you didn’t know. A Joel you could surely get used to. Even if you only saw him every year or so.

“Pinks and purples. I ran out of those so quick. Didn’t know how much I liked them.”

He nodded, “Pink and purple yarn coming right up.”

“Thank you, Joel.”

He shrugged, “Consider it a trade.”

Three – Fifteen Years Post Outbreak: The Seed Trade

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Looking around to make sure Bill wasn’t going to pop up.

Frank shrugged, “He’s got so many fucking guns he won’t notice a measly 9mm missing.”

You sighed feeling that anxiety rising in your chest, “Fine. Who’s coming for this trade?”

“Joel.”

“Joel?” You sounded surprised. It had only been six months or so since you’d seen him last. Not that you were complaining in the slightest. You’d always welcome him back.

“And Tess.” He smirked, “But I just wanted to see your reaction.”

“Oh, fuck off.” You giggled knowing he was teasing about your crush on Joel.

“They say after six months of crushing on someone it’s love. It’s been what? Eight fucking years of the two of you flirting like mad when he comes around. I think it’s past love at this point.”

“What of it Frank? It’s not like he’s moving in here. It’s not like I’m moving to the Boston QZ.” Rolling your eyes, you leaned onto the chain link fence.

Franked rolled his eyes right back at you, “Why couldn’t he move here?”

“Uhm, because he has his own life with Tess?”

He shrugged, “You know people moved for far less in the pre-outbreak days.”

“Well, we aren’t living in those days, are we? We’re living in fucking reality Frank. He has a life. I have mine.”

“You haven’t even asked.”

“It’s not my place to.” You admitted. Sure, you’d thought of it, but it wasn’t your place to in the slightest. This was Bill’s place after all. The two of you so immersed in the debate back and forth neither of you heard the pair coming up on you both. It wasn’t even like they were being that silent.

“What were you guys talking about?” Tess asked popping out of thin air. Joel stood behind her smirking at the heated conversation between the two siblings. He and Tommy bearing a striking resemblance to the bickering siblings.

“Nothing!” You turned smiling at the pair you’ve grown to love over the years.

“Joel!” Frank said right after you. You turned towards your sibling eyeing him up and down. The nerve on him beyond you at this point. Frank was really just tired of waiting to see you two together. He knew there was nothing going on between Joel and Tess, like you were worried about, but he also knew Joel was apprehensive. As were you.

“And Tess!” You turned towards the two of them again, “Good to see you both so soon.” You smiled brightly towards Joel. Your best smile reserved for your favorite man. That certainly didn’t help your case with Frank though.

“I got you some more colors.” He handed you a duffel bag stuffed full, “Red, purple and blue this time.”

“You’re spoiling me, Joel Miller.” You cheered happily accepting the gift. Tess and Frank could only step back and watch the innocent interaction. For the life of her Tess couldn’t understand how soft Joel got with you. Only with you. Frank too marveled at your nerves with the man. Your usual confident self only seemed to waver in his presence.

“Or” You turned back towards him with wide eyes. Getting ready to tease him, “Is it because you know I’ll make you nice clothing?” You continued on, welcoming the harmless flirting that always seemed to arise between the two of you.

“You caught on quick.” He threw you a rare wink.

You giggled softly, acutely aware of the audience intently listening in behind you, “You’re lucky I adore you both. I’m more than happy. Any requests?” It really was your favorite. Gift giving was your love language to others. It just made you so warm and fuzzy inside to see everybody’s reactions to getting something they love.

Tess coughed, not caring that she was interrupting the moment. She needed some items and if you were offering, she would be taking. She missed the harsh glare from Frank though, “I really could use some new socks.”

You turned towards your friends, “You got it. Stick around long enough today and I go grab you a few pairs?”

She nodded her head quickly, “I honestly could really use them. You mind Joel?”

“As long as Bill doesn’t.”

Frank shook his head quickly, “Not at all! We’ll make sure to have dinner ready for everybody.”

“We wouldn’t want to impose…” Joel began before you bucked up the courage and interrupted him. You wanted him to stay.

“You wouldn’t be at all. Bill and Frank love cooking. Enjoy it.”

Joel nodded folding into your assurance quickly. That’s all he really needed to hear before he agreed to staying.

“Thank God.” Tess grumbled, “I could use some good food too. Joel, we gotta get out here more often.” Tess notes.

“I agree!” You nodded trying not to be too gleeful about the innocent proposition.

“Yes please.” Frank nods. He adores hosting and wants people to come around more often. Especially if those people include Joel. He so desperately wanted to see you happy with him. Even if it meant losing you to the Boston QZ. He knew you’d visit.

Joel let out a rare laugh seeing the group so happy. So fucking carefree. So, unlike the norm. God, he missed the old days. How simple that life really was, “I’m not stopping anyone.”

Tess smiled, “It’s settled then. We’re coming for you more often.”

Your face lit up at the confirmation, “Good. Well come on then.” You flashed your smile towards Joel, “You know where everything is, get comfy.” Beckoning them to come in with your hand you turned back towards Tess, “What color this time? I’ll even make you blue ones if you want!” Your cheeks began hurting from the grin that wouldn’t fall from your face. It warmed your heart that Joel always brought you more yarn, always. Even five years after that conversation with him, he never failed to bring you some.

She shook her head, “Just use some scrap yarn or something, nothing special.”

“You deserve to have a color you want Tess. Something that makes you happy. Plus you know I have a pair in every color ready to go.” Your eyes softened as you really looker her over now. The last five years not being kind on her, on anyone really. Her initial soft features began hardening over time. Wrinkles formed where her scowl always was. The world wasn’t kind to you. But the world was downright cruel to Tess and Joel.

“Anything is fine really…”

You stopped immediately not satisfied with her answer. Joel almost ran you over as he was paying attention too closely to the conversation and not what you were doing, “Well, what’s your favorite color?”

She laughed, “That’s something I haven’t thought of in a while.”

Giving her a sad look these conversations never failed to pull at your heartstrings. You all were unfortunately born into a world that would simply never exist anymore. A world that was thriving. A world that was so fucking foreign it hurt. You were almost jealous of the humans being born in the post-outbreak world. They would never know the luxury of living that old life. This was all they knew. This was their normal. This September will mark the fifteenth year that you were living this new normal. This insanely fucked up normal.

“Mine was pink. But it just doesn’t seem as happy anymore.” You admitted, “I think my new favorite is blue. Sky blue. That’s happiness to me.” You shot her a small smile.

“Why’s that?” She asked as the group started their short walk back to Bill’s house.

You shrugged hoping what you were admit didn’t make you look too soft, “When I get tired of gardening I like to lay down and just look up. Watch the clouds like I did when I was a little kid. Find figures in the clouds. The sky never changes. There’s just something so cathartic about it.”

You didn’t see it because he was walking behind you but a ghost of a smile crossed Joel’s lips. He couldn’t help it. He was so fucking drawn into everything about you. So gentle in a world that wanted to rip you apart at any moment. He, of course, made a note of it. He needed to find sky blue yarn. It wouldn’t be easy now. It started getting difficult to find untouched yarn in the QZ. It was even harder finding it outside. But it never bothered him. The smile alone on your face when he handed you a bag full of yarn was worth all the trouble to get it.

Tess nodded, “I think mines green. Grass green. Tree green.”

“And why’s that?” You asked her the same question, curious as to what she came up with.

“Green means the weather gets better. It just makes life easier.” She let out a small sigh of frustration. A growing frustration of trying to stay alive. It wears down on you far too quickly.

Again, another wave of sadness rushed through your heart. Why were you, of all people in the world, given the chance to live this somewhat normal life in the middle of nowhere? Why wasn’t Joel given the chance? Tess? The longer you lived here relatively unstressed the more guilty you felt through it all. Especially seeing just how much the real world had aged the pair.

“Then green it is. I have a really nice forest green pair I think you’ll like. Did the last pair fit okay?”

She nodded opting not to reply verbally feeling the emotions bubble up from deep within her. Emotions she buried so deep down she wasn’t sure if they’d ever come back up. But your gentleness with her, your determination to break down those walls she put up so high was beginning to crack the walls. How you could be so thoughtful was beyond her greatest comprehension. You had to be selfish in the world. You were the opposite.

“Okay!” You clapped at the group made it back to the house, “I’m going to run to the boutique to grab what I need. See you guys later.”

“Want some company?”

Your stupid heart sped right on up hearing that husky voice from behind you. Biting your cheek, you wanted to hide the smile that was forming automatically. God, you’d dreamed of moments like these. Moments where Joel sought you out instead of you seeking him out. Moments where you knew he liked you. Wanted to be around you.

“I’ll always take your company Joel.” Turning towards him you did not want to see Frank and Tess’s reaction. There was a 100% chance they’d run into the house giggling like little schoolgirls gossiping about the two of you. They turned into middle school girls the second any kind of drama could be sniffed in the air.

You could’ve sworn you saw the slightest hint of a blush dance across the apples of his cheeks.

Giving him a soft smile, you started walking to the boutique with Joel in tow.

“How are you doing Joel?” You asked hoping he’d give you the real answer not the bullshit fluffy stuff you were used to. You always asked him this same question each time he came.

“I’m… tired.” He admitted while running his hand through his grown-out hair.

Looking down to the ground you hid the frown as you kept pace with Joel now, “I can’t even imagine Joel. I’m so sorry... I”

He cut you off by placing a friendly hand on your shoulder. The contact immediately making you freeze up. It’d been too long since you’d been touched by anybody other than your brother or Bill. Your eyes clouded over with unshed tears as you tried to bite back the emotion that suddenly overcame you.

“You don’t need to apologize.” You continued to walk as you racked your brain for anything to say to him, but it seemed to have short circuited.

“I feel guilty.” Not having a clue why you were admitting it to him you blinked a few times hiding your emotions best as you could.

Joel didn’t understand why you would feel that way. He just gave you a curious look, waiting for you to continue. When you didn’t hear his reply you finally bucked up the courage to get another look back at him. His eyes urging for you to elaborate.

“Why me? Why did I get to live this life. This easy, simple life? How did I luck into it? I guess it doesn’t really matter. It’s all ending soon anyway.” You decided to drop the bomb on Joel. Finally feeling like you could tell somebody.

“Why do you say that?”

You sighed finally spitting out what’s been bothering you for the last few months, “I think Frank’s sick.”

“What kinda sick?”

“Not infected. I think it’s like pre-outbreak sick Joel.” You turned away wiping the stupid tears that slipped down your cheek. You were worried. So, fucking worried for your best friend.

Joel still looked confused, “Okay. Why do you think that?”

“He’s tired all the time. Complains to Bill about losing feeling in his hands and feet. He doesn’t remember things like he use to. I don’t know. Maybe I’m looking too much into it, but something just doesn’t feel right.”

Joel frowned trying to think of words to comfort you, but he came up terribly short. He didn’t do this. He couldn’t do this. The last time he had to was when Sarah was alive. An entire lifetime ago.

You continued knowing he hadn’t a clue what to say, “Bill won’t talk to me about it either. Says nothing’s wrong. I don’t know what to do Joel. They can’t just ignore it.

“Do you think there’s medicine? I can try and find something.”

You shook your head, “Don’t think so. Don’t think they had a cure back then. Sure as hell don’t have one now.”

“Well, you don’t know that Y/N.”

“It’s not cancer. It’s in his brain or something. That’s what the books are saying. I don’t know Joel. It just doesn’t feel right.”

He nodded, “Keep an eye on him.”

You stopped in once you reached the store. Quickly you ran in grabbing what you needed before meeting him back on the street to start your walk back to Bill’s house. Both of you walked back in silence, unsure of what to say.

“You shouldn’t feel guilty.” Joel broke the comfortable silence that consumed the walk home.

“Yeah.” You mumbled not really feeling like debating right now.

“Really. You and Frank were meant to find this place. You were meant to do everything here. You’ve been a constant in Tess’s life. My life, for the last eight years? God, how’s it been that long?” Joel smiled thinking back on his times with you,.

You smiled, “Don’t make me feel so old Joel.”

That drew a heavenly laugh out of your favorite guy. Something that came around so rarely that you cherished every second, “You’re still a kid.” Joel didn’t believe that. As cruel as this world was to everyone it still looked so beautiful on you. You hadn’t aged like everyone he knew. A woman who could pass in her twenties easily.

Scoffing you shook your head, “Hardly! I’m seasoned at life.”

“You sure are.” Joel nodded. He smiled as he studied you this time around. He wished and prayed he wouldn’t have fallen for you, but he couldn’t resist. Not with that smile. Not with your kindness. He wished this was easier. There was no easy way to go about it. That’s why neither of you cared to admit your feelings. What good would it really do but complicate things further?

You made it back to the house where you were ambushed by Frank who looked far too happy, “Y/N! They got us strawberry seeds! Your favorite, remember?”

Walking over to him you inspected the seeds. Looking up to Tess you smiled softly to her, “Thank you. I haven’t had a, uh, strawberry in what?” You looked to Frank brushing the tears away from your eyes, “Fifteen years now?”

He nodded with a big happy smile, “Yeah, fifteen years.”

You turned to Joel, “Thank you so much!”

“Sure, we would’ve brought them sooner if I would’ve known you liked them so much.” He admitted. He wasn’t sure how you did that to him. Got him admitting embarrassing things in front of everybody he knew.

“I guess I just forgot about them. Such a luxury I didn’t even think of. They were our mom’s favorite. She found a way to incorporate them in our food almost everyday.”

Frank wrapped you in a hug. He knew just how soft you were. How sad you got when you thought about mom or dad. They just disappeared right out of your life. Dad never made it back from work that day. Mom got infected the second day. Neither of you could kill her so you ran. Ran so far away until you landed in the Baltimore QZ. Until it then was demolished.

Giving him a squeeze to let him know you were alright you pulled yourself away from him, “Thank you both. Really. Now you’ll just have to come back in a few months when they’re grown. We can make some strawberry shortcake.” The gears started turning in your head. There were so many new recipes you guys could use with strawberries now on the menu.

Joel nodded. Tess agreed, “We already agreed to coming around more often anyway. Now it’s just an extra excuse.”

Frank pulled her to the living room to talk about who knows what.

“Alright, I’ve gotta get to work.” You held up the green yarn. Walking over to the chair in the window you got comfortable.

“Want some company?” Your favorite voice broke your concentration.

“You know my answer, Joel Miller.” With some newfound confidence you winked at him as you said so.

Four – Eighteen Years Post Outbreak: The Trip Back to Boston

“No. No, no, no, no, fuck no!” You punched the pillow sitting next to you with all your might. This couldn’t be fucking happening to you. They couldn’t be making you leave. Feeling your heart tip into two you let the tears fall freely. How could your brother do this to you? You knew his health was the reason, but you couldn’t fathom why he wouldn’t let you stay. You’ve been through this whole thing with him. It felt like he was just abandoning you.

“Y/N… you have to.” Frank’s sad face broke you. You didn’t care about his feelings anymore. You broke down completely now letting the loud sobs free.

“Please Frank, please don’t make me go.” Choking on your words you could hardly comprehend why he was saying this. Why he was making you go.

“You can’t be here any longer. You have to go.” He couldn’t look at you not with the look you had on your face.

“Just tell me why Frank! I can help. I can help you both. I’ll do more. If that’s what it is, you know I’ll do more Frank. Please don’t make me go. Please Frank.”

He shook his head letting his own fresh set of tears fall, “I’m dying Y/N. I’ve got a few months, maybe a year left. You can’t be here for that.”

“I’ll die out there.” You shook your head back and forth suddenly terrified of what traveling to Boston actually meant. The real world. The sick world. The world that wanted to kill you.

“Not with Joel. Not with Tess.”

A cry broke from your throat, “Just like that? After all this time? I can be there for you in the end. I can help Bill.”

“Bill’s going to have to move on to and I’m not sure if you fit into that plan.”

“Oh.” You continued to cry. Curling up within yourself you let yourself cry until you couldn’t anymore. Frank didn’t dare try and comfort you. He knew that wasn’t welcomed. So, he sat there. He wasn’t going to leave you. Not yet anyway.

After calming down you finally processed what the this all meant. It meant the end of the road for you and Frank. It meant starting over, completely. You knew it would end sooner or later but it still stung. It didn’t feel like enough time.

Standing suddenly, you caught Frank’s attention who was just sitting there with his head down, “I’m staying in the guest house.”

“Y/N…”

“Night.” You shut the door behind you, loudly.

It was still bright out when you laid down to go to sleep. Joel and Tess would be here in the morning to get you. To take you to your new home. Turning over in your bed you looked out the bedroom window studying your home once more. The flowers that bloomed out front reminded you of all the times you and Frank spent gardening. Making your home beautiful.

No longer would you be able to make trips to the boutique. No longer would you be able to stock it up for your guests. No longer would you get to live in this little fantasy land.  

Woken by a hand on your shoulder you pushed the hand away, annoyed you were woken so abruptly, “Go away Frank.” You mumbled.

“Not Frank.” Fuck. Why was Joel in your room waking you up?

“Oh,” You couldn’t bear to turn towards him. You adored him. Loved him even. But you didn’t want to go like this. Being forced outside your will. It hurt. Crushed you even. You didn’t want to take your anger out on Joel so best to keep your back turned to him. But God, you just wanted to scream. Yesterday you were just living your life as normal, as possible, that you could. Then Frank dropped the bomb and now you were just expected to go, “Sorry, Joel.” Meekly replying to the man, you shed a single tear. That’s the one thing you hated about yourself. How damn emotional you got. You couldn’t bottle it up even if you tried.

“S’fine.” He sighed not sure what to say. What could he say? He knew you didn’t want to go. Frank warned him and Tess once they got there. He knew just how devastated you likely were. Everything you knew was about to vanish. Joel had gone through that a few times. It wasn’t the best feeling. But he always survived. He knew you’d be just fine. And there was that sick twisted thought of happiness that you’d be close to him.

He tried to fight these feelings away. Tried his damn hardest. He knew you couldn’t really love in a world like this. How devastating it always ended. Nobody was ever really that lucky. Joel had loved hard and lost even harder. He swore he’d never let in anybody ever again. Tess was the closest and they were just partners. Nothing more. He loved her but he wasn’t in love with her.

Then you came along. All happy and shit. He swore he’d never love hard again but that promise seemed to crack each time he saw you. You never failed to put a smile on his usual stoic face. He resisted the urges for so long until he couldn’t any longer.

“Can you give me a moment?” You asked hoping he’d take the hint.

He nodded before realizing you were turned away from him, “Right, yeah. I’ll be at Bill’s place.”

“Okay.” You closed your eyes until you heard him close the door. Letting out the shaky breath you were holding. You watched from your window as Joel walked slowly back over to Bill’s place. Seemingly lost in thought.

You put on the fresh set of clothes that you always left over. A simple set of jeans, t-shirt, and a hoodie. Not believing it was really it you forced your legs to walk back over. You had to face the music sooner or later.

“Morning.” You nodded your head at Tess, the first person you saw sitting in the living room.

Giving you a sad smile, she nodded right back to you, “Morning.”

“Y/N.” You heard your brothers voice, “Bill made you a pack. It’s got everything you might need.”

Biting your lip, you took it gratefully. You really couldn’t have done it without either of them, “Thank you.”

“You’ll be okay out there.”

“Sure.”

Joel and Tess sat back watching the painful interaction. Tess nodding towards the door letting Joel know they needed to get out. They both snuck out without you or your brother really noticing. Both too caught up in whatever the hell this was.

“Y/N.”

“Spit it out Frank.”

“I don’t want you to hate me. I’m doing this for you. It’s best for you.” You leaned back into the wall crossing your arms. Choosing your words very wisely. This would be the last time you’d talk with him in this lifetime. You had to do this right. For his sake and yours.

“I don’t hate you. I could never hate you. I love you so fucking much it hurts.” You let a tear fall. Dammit here they came. The waterworks, “I just wish you’d let me be here for you but if you think this is best then I’ll go.”

“It’s best.”

Letting a few more tears slip you nodded your head, “Tell Bill that I love him. I love you, Frank.” You walked over hugging him tightly. Squeezing him so tightly you knew it was hurting him, but he didn’t dare say a word. You were hurt and grieving him even while he was still standing there.

Letting him go you gave him your best smile, “I’ll always love you, Frank.”

“And I’ll always love you. Be safe out there.”

“You know it.” You turned quickly walking towards the door. Shutting it behind you, you took a breath. Why did you have to be born into this world? What good fucking came out of all of this. What was the point?

Walking over to Joel and Tess, you gave them a quick head nod.

“You alright?” Tess asked.

“Yeah, let’s go.”

Joel looked a little too apprehensive seeing your blood shot eyes and rosy cheeks, “You sure?”

“Positive. Please, let’s go.”

“Alright, follow me.” Tess led the way. This was your life now. This was going to be just fine.

The walk back to the QZ was quiet and cold. You didn’t dare complain though. They were simply doing this as friends. Whatever the hell friends were. It only dawned on you as soon as you got close, without incident, that you were an outsider. How in the fuck was that going to work?

“Joel?” You asked one night shortly before you arrived.

“Hmm?” He stayed silent most of the way. Not ever knowing what to say to you. God, he wanted to be a source of comfort, but he hadn’t a clue how to be for you.

“How’s this going to work? I’m an outsider and all.”

He understood your concern, “It’s all taken care of. Tess got some paperwork made up. You’ll live with me for the time being and we’ll find you a job.”

“Cool,” You nodded. Pleasantly surprised that it had been so thought out, “Thanks Joel.”

“Sure.” He had a hard time looking at you. Knowing he’d cave for whatever friendly look you’d be giving his way.

“Thanks for everything Joel. Really. For protecting me and what not.” You mumbled feeling terribly awkward about it all. Even though you didn’t appreciate your life so much anymore it felt good to be looked after. To be wanted and taken care of.

“I’ll always protect you.”

Five – Twenty Years Post Outbreak: The Trip Back to Bill’s

“You don’t have to go in.” Joel stood at the gate blocking the path for you and Ellie.

You shook your head, “I’m okay.”

Ellie rolled her eyes, “Let’s fucking go then.”

Smiling at the girl you turned back towards Joel, “You heard the girl.”

He gave you a skeptical look, “You sure?”

“Yeah, I just won’t go in the house.” You kept your eyes forward, not darling to look at him.

He nodded turning back towards the overgrown town. Ellie walked past you keeping pace with Joel. Bugging him about something. You hung back taking a leisurely stroll through your old home. A place you called home for nearly fourteen years.

The usual green grass had turned a shade of brown without Frank’s attention to detail. The bright yellow flowers had been overgrown with weeds. A tug at your heartstrings knowing the worst had come to Frank. That was expected. His condition going from okay to tragic in a matter of a few months. What you didn’t expect was Bill taking his life too. Bill wouldn’t let this place go to shit. It was his home first.

Too quickly you made it back to the house. Joel looked back at you before he and Ellie went in. You nodded, letting him know it was alright. You made your way to the side of the house where your garden was. You strolled through the raised garden beds that were overgrown with who knows what now. It looked like the place hadn’t been touched in two years. He must’ve done it right after you left. They must’ve decided together. Without you.

Tears sprung to your eyes when you spotted the thriving strawberry patch. Somehow untouched by weeds or the animals around it your once small square of strawberries had grown tenfold. Seemingly thriving in this environment.

Squatting down you picked a ripe one. Turning it over in your hand a few times just thinking about Frank before you ate it. He would’ve loved to share one last one with you.

“To Frank.” You mumbled before taking the last bite, discarding the stem on the floor.

You sat down next to the strawberry patch grabbing a few more before you laid back onto the grass. Letting yourself feel sorry for yourself after everything. Knowing what Frank was going to do. Seeing Tess die in front of your eyes. Realizing Bill also left this world. Everyone you loved and cared for gone in a matter of two years.

Tess’s death hurt you the worst. One moment she was there and the next she wasn’t. So unexpected. You had time to process and grieve your brother’s death. Bills caught you off guard but didn’t surprise you completely.

Looking up to the sky you remembered a long-ago conversation with Tess about favorite colors. Sky Blue. It looked so pretty today. Not a single cloud in the sky. One big blue sky.

“Bill’s gone.” Joel’s voice interrupted your peaceful solace.

Flicking your eyes over to look at him you didn’t see Ellie behind him, “I know.”

“You, okay?” He took a seat next to you.

“Mhmm. I’m fine. Take a strawberry. They’re still good.” You smiled up at him continuing to lay on your back.

He did as you instructed, “They are.”

Giving him a genuine smile, you just felt comforted by his presence. He was the only constant in your life for the last two years. You’d grown far too attached to the man, but could you blame yourself? He was everything to you. You were so terrified that you’d lose him too. It’s all you seemed to be doing in the last two years.

“Get everything you need?”

“Yeah. Battery is charging for another hour or so.”

“Ellie?”

“She checking out the town. I told her about the boutique.”

Sitting up you looked over at him. He was so beautiful. The salt and pepper look throughout his hair only making him more attractive in your eyes. The scar that graced his cheek enhanced everything about him. His hair was at the perfect length where it flicked all over the place. He’d probably start complaining in a few weeks. Then you’d cut it and it’d be far too short, and you had to wait until it was your favorite length again.

“Maybe she’ll grab something.”

He nodded, “Power still works. Grab a shower while you can?” He stood up offering you a hand.

“Sure,” You took his hand in yours. Joel pulled you up gingerly. Always so careful with you, “Thanks Joel. I’m going to the house next door. It should still be stocked up.”

“Need a change of clothes?”

He was always so thoughtful with you. Never skipping a beat, always making you a priority. His way of showing just how much he loved you. And he did. Boy did he love you. He just had a hard time expressing it directly. Showing his love in other ways instead. He initially said no when Frank proposed you coming back with them to Boston. But when he heard his pleas through the radio, he knew what he needed to do.

He was surprised at how well you adapted out there. You knew your strengths, weaknesses. You knew how to be helpful and when to take a step back. You never complained either. Just wore a smile on your face instead. That was how you coped. Smile and walk. You’d be there soon enough. The first trip was the hardest. It got easier after that. Joel wouldn’t let you sneak out with him at first. Too scared you’d get hurt. But Tess eventually convinced him. Then you were off helping them out as you could.

“If you don’t mind? There should be some clothes in my room.”

“You got it.”

You’d known about Frank’s passing. Hoping to come to Bill’s for supplies. Lucky for you it hadn’t been raided, yet. Joel worked on getting the truck ready while you and Ellie showered.

You walked back over to Bill’s standing at the front door. You wanted to go in so bad, but it didn’t feel right. Something tell you that you shouldn’t.

“Hey, you hear me?”

You snapped out of the trance you seemed to be under, “No, sorry Joel, what’s up?”

“Come on, need your help loading up.” He motioned to the garage on the side of the house.

“Yeah, alright.” You jogged over to meet him, “Thanks for the clothes.”

“Mhmm.” He kept his gaze forward.

You really couldn’t take it much longer. The thought of losing yet another person with telling them how you felt just didn’t sit right any longer.

“You know I love you right?” You asked.

“What?” he paused looking taken aback at your sudden admittance.

“I love you, Joel.” You smiled a genuine smile. One that felt so good to do.

“You do?”

“Why do you look so surprised? Of course, I do. You’re everything to me.”

He gave you that brilliant smile that made you weak at the knees, “You love me, huh?”

You slapped his arm, “I love you. How many times are you going to make me say it?” You giggled feeling like he was loosening up. Softening even further as he saw your overexcited state

“I dunno.” He took a step towards you, “It sounds nice.”

“Yeah?” You asked transfixed on his gaze.

“Oh yeah, and you know what?” He asked.

“What’s that?”

“I think I love you too.” It felt strange admitting it out loud, but damn did it feel good. Right.

Your heart started racing, “You think?” Raising your eyebrows, you dared take a step closer to him.

He shook his head a bit upset by his choice of words. Always seeming to mess them up, “I know. I love you, Y/N.””

“I like the sound of that.” You didn’t let your smile fade only bigger. God did I feel good to get it out. You knew what his answer would be. He showed his love in other ways but damn did it feel good to hear.

“Yeah, now come here.”

[lovelyyandereaddictionpoint]

Week 1-4: Yandere Apocalypse - Uvil Penz

Original Post

Getting to meet everyone was nice and all but it’s entirely different from living with them

When it comes to sleeping arrangements the Penz brother’s each had their own rooms

Naturally Marco was sharing with Aria

Willaim with Simpson 

Leaving Uvil who speedily offered to room with you

“If you wouldn’t mind (Y/n), maybe you should stay with me.”

Of course Henrietta and Grant would have a problem with this

Both of them whining about the other as you let Uvil usher you away from the living room

“C’mon don’t leave me with this crazy broad!”

“Nooo! But (Y/n) reminds me the most of my baby! I need to sleep with them! THIS IS SO UNFAIR-”

With the clicks of multiple locks he decides you both are ready to turn in for the night

“Just for safety. After all you don’t really know these…strangers yet.”

“Uh thanks.”

You try to ignore the fact you don’t really know him either

But with a sporadically themed bedroom with two beds and a full bathroom, you’re not complaining

Because of your closeness with one another it’s natural as tiredness tugs at your eyes that you confide in him

“I for one, am glad you survived. I’m sorry for the emptyiness you feel but I think you’ve filled something for all of us…especially me.”

It’s nice when he says sweet things to you

And when he leads the group with grace

Or when he makes a fair meal plan for everyone to follow with the refrigerated and canned rations

…it just gets weird when he so easily adapts to the invasive demands of the group

Siphoning your time like some prized toy

“(Y/n) will not be drinking from you for at least another day…your behavior with the food rations is to blame.”

“THAT IS SO UNFAIR!WAAAAHHH!”

“Ha weird idiot, instead they’ll have to endure my ultimate smackdown…in the gaming room.”

“No to you too little brother.”

“What?! What did I do!?”

“Marco says you made Aria cry and he refused to operate the drones we have outside because of that. Thus you’ve lost your (Y/n)-privileges.”

“That’s….so unfair...”

Of course he doesn’t bother to ask you at all despite how polite he is pretends to be

But he has no problem intertwining his hand with yours while he goes around the bunker taking inventory

Or encouraging you to watch movies while cuddled up beside him

Its not so bad

It’s a great way to get used to the bunker life 

With Uvil’s guidance you’ll start to get used to this new way of life

And by the end of the 2nd week you’re starting to find your way on your own

But Uvil will never let that happen

Still hovering around you and monitoring your time despite your independence

“Space? (Y/n) you’re my dearest bunker-mate, of course I worry about you.”

It’s annoying but he’s far from the worst person in the bunker

Unbeknownst to you, Uvil’s only the best at hiding his obsession with you

When he’s not by your side he’s watching the cameras intensely for everyone’s movements

3 monitors dedicated to you 

What camera room?

The camera room only the Penz brothers seem to know about and none of them will confess

Not only being your most devoted watcher he’s the only one free enough to suffocate on the sheets you slept in 

To touch keep the dirty laundry you share with him

Or the access he gets to your journal entries 

But the best thing of all is the closeness he’s granted as your first real friend

“(Y/n) would you like a massage while we watch a horror movie? I know you’ve been feeling tense lately and I want nothing more than to help you relieve that.”

He knows a month is all he’ll get away with

Before the others start to riot

But this will be enough…for now

“I’m going to miss you (Y/n)...but it’s a small cycle. You’ll be back with me before you notice. And you’ll always find a safe space in my bed room.”

[hypersomniagame]

HYPERSOMNIA JANUARY DEV LOG : "LOG 1, WOOHOO!"

Hi! For all of you who follow HYPERSOMNIA, or are just stopping by, let me introduce you to this post to really set the tone.

For 2024, I am going to try to release a dev log about HYPERSOMNIA once a month, may come earlier, may come a little late, but I'm doing this to help give insight on to how the game is going, and to give me motivation to work on the game.

First things first, big news!

HYPERSOMNIA IS NOW AVAILABLE TO WISHLIST ON STEAM! (LINK)

After a while of back and forwarding with Valve, I've finally got a Steam page to call my own, and MAN is it bizarre seeing my weird little RPG in my Steam library. Like, that's my logo, and my key art, and screenshots of MY game, that's so weird. It doesn't feel real. BUT IT IS!

And, I would really really really really really appreciate it if you would consider wishlisting the game on Steam. It helps with the algorithm, and my happiness because I like seeing numbers go up, it feels good.

I even drew this as a announcement/commemoration for the page going live.

(P.S; if you couldn't tell, I really like Half-Life, it's one of my favorite game series.)

Secondly...

A new trailer is in the works! We were accepted for this year's MOTHER Direct (4th time baby, whoo!)

The trailer has been coming along well, I hope to show more battle oriented clips that I've missed the last few years, like special moves.

Can you believe I've never actually gotten to adding those in the game? I mean, they come set-up in default RPG Maker projects but I've never gotten around to revamping them until now, year 4 of engine work. Isn't that strange?

I also hope to improve on editing in the trailers. Whenever I finish a trailer I come back a few months later to notice minor points where I was kinda sloppy.

I'm not much of a video editor, (I only learned so I could edit trailers on my own) but I'd like to keep them at a good presentable quality. You gotta have standards with that kinda stuff, it's important!

OK, TIME FOR THE ACTUAL GAME STUFF. HERE WE GO.

Abilities are now implemented! And work! Wahoo!

In HYPERSOMNIA, players are able to switch abilities between party members. I find this a really interesting mechanic for how simple it seems, you get to choose who plays what role in your party. I think this is HUGE, and opens up a lot of unique scenarios for the game's encounters. I've had this planned for years, as far back as 2021 if I can recall, so it's super cool seeing it in game.

Mapping is being worked on!

I've also been working on mapping out more areas of the game! The forest part you hopefully saw in the last trailer is almost completely mapped. I've been working on the second part to it and am hoping to finish it sometime soon.

Mapping forests really suck. THOUGH, almost all the maps for the first chapter of the game are done! That's just another step closer to the demo. (Which, FYI, will be on Steam and Itch! ^^)

I've also been working on re-spriting older scenes!

This one's been really fun to do, I've been going back and redoing older stuff from the 2022 trailer, like this train! It's weird seeing it side by side, because you can definitely see where it's come from but at the same time, it looks so different.

(Also side note, these sprites are CRUSTY! EWWW!)

Lastly, Script and Music updates!

The script for HYPERSOMNIA's first act has been completed! with just 37 pages of just cutscene dialog alone! We're also currently working on wrapping up NPC dialog! Not much else to say.

And music is being worked on!

Music has been making some progress! I like to lay out demo's for areas I'm mapping out to help make both the music and scene come together. (Also, to help break up the eerie silence when playtesting...)

Speaking of music, FIREBALL, the games main battle theme, was recently delisted on our YouTube channel.

We did this because we decided we wanted to resample FIREBALL, and found that it's best to not have the song uploaded until a complete, final version is made. At least for the demo, it could possibly change before the final game but that's a bit too far in the future for me to think about fully.

Hey! Thanks for reading the whole dev log! Unless you just skipped to the end, you should probably go back up and read it. there's a steam page now. and some cool ross art at the top. you're missing out!

I hope this was like, readable to you all. I'm new to this whole dev log thing, so if you read it all the way through, let me know! It'd be cool!

I'd like to use this portion to pretty much just advertise Unique Indie RPG's.

Have you ever seen that strange purple square at the beginning of the 2nd and 3rd HYPERSOMNIA trailers?

Yeah, that! That's UNIQUE INDIE RPG's, which is a Discord community for you guessed it, Unique Indie RPG videogames developed by people like me! Or you! Or whoever! Who cares!

I help run it with some of my friends, and we all share cool stuff about our videogames! There's a ton of other SUPER cool RPG Maker games there like Astral Guard [LINK], or SOMEWHEN [LINK], or even MOMOinc [LINK]!

And of course, HYPERSOMNIA. It's a really laid back community, we're all super chill. Come swing by! We'd love to have ya, and SHOW US YOUR GAME!

[LINK TO DISCORD SERVER]

TWITTER

YOUTUBE

STEAM

UNIQUE INDIE RPG'S [SHOW US YOUR GAME!]

[PREV] [ABOUT HYPERSOMNIA] [NEXT]

[kirisaki-daichi-scenarios]

the boys as bodyguards

dedicated to absolutely no one. sure this is an asks blog - does that mean i have to actually answer them? i know i know bad admins bad admins whatcha gonna do whatcha gonna do when they come for you but i had a dream ages ago now that involved bodyguards, tsunamis, and also a shit ton of murder. don't ask. anyway, it got me pondering. and then it took literal months to write this so i figured i'd post what i've got so far, and maybe i'll update with the rest of the boys later, depending on how well this does/how much time i have

hanamiya makoto

hanamiya’s the package deal

he’s the chief advisor; he’s the doctor; he’s the bodyguard; he’s the sniper. just a right hand man in every way possible.

i mean, he’s not literally your right hand man: he’s the leader of a team, and often it’ll be one of his men there next to you at events, but he’s always supervising or coordinating or collecting intel

ie he’s dedicated to his job. he does like engineering spider’s webs after all.

having said that, he’s also an uncontrollable prick

he’s the best at giving you advice, both in terms of navigating high society and in terms of actual business advice, but is he going to give that advice without slipping in a snide comment about how you should really know all this by now? when you tell him to make sure to take a break some time, is he going to stop himself from saying “maybe if you weren’t so incredibly useless on your own, i’d be able to.”

and sure maybe he’s breaking the universal declaration of human rights with what he does to the people who dare to try harm you, but you don’t know about that

need to know basis type beat

you don’t even have access to the full floor plans of your own property, which includes a basement you’ll never know about, let alone step foot in. hanamiya keeps that information very close to his chest.

gotta make sure his employer has plausable deniability

gotta make double sure that you don’t find out about half the things he does - from the ways he sources his information, to his very dodgy organised crime links, to the number of people that have sadly lost their lives in the name of “fuck it, you’re pissing me off” - because he hates when you bang on about bullshit like “laws” and “morals”

after all, if everyone followed your beloved laws and morals, then you’d have no need for his services

as he always tells you, he’s just your pet necessary evil

yamazaki hiroshi

i reckon he only got into the bodyguard business because he spent his childhood wanting to be a samurai but, well you know, that’s not really a job opportunity anymore

what it does mean though is that he’s all about bushido: mastering his work, bravery, honesty, etc - and above all else loyalty to one’s employer

on a random thursday afternoon, he’ll tell you, completely nonchalantly, straight face, “i would die for you if that’s what it takes. on my life, i’ll always keep you safe.”

you’re staring at him like wtf and/or trying to stop yourself blushing, but he thinks that’s a completely normal thing to say cause he’s just following bushido

of course, late one night, he’ll wake up realise how weird that came across and he’ll spend the next week trying not to blush whenever you talk to him

just like the time he spent a week kicking himself after you walked in on him training, shirtless and rather sweaty, and when you told him he should take a break, he said “but i need to train so my body can be at its best for you”

again, at the time that sounded very reasonable, serious, and totally bushido to him. it’s only later that he’s freaking out in his room like why in god’s name did he say that.

but hey that’s bodyguard!yamazaki for you. a little weird, a little socially inept, but loyal to a fault

haizaki shougo

can you imagine the number of jobs that this man has lost for sleeping on the job?

he’s only got his current gig looking after you because his prices are cheaper and you were getting desperate to find someone in your budget

he’s a ...uhh… unique bodyguard? in the sense that he’ll get you out of harms way eventually, but "eventually" is the key word there

haizaki actively ignores intel that a certain location might be dangerous, because he really just wants to get into fights. sure you might get in the way occasionally, maybe even get some nasty bruises, but hey you get what you pay for.

you want a good bodyguard, save up some money, idiot.

literally the only reason he got into being a bodyguard is so he can beat people up legally (and because he got dishourably discharged from the military); he doesn’t care that much about the whole ‘protecting’ side of things

he’s also the type to ditch you the minute a better paying job comes up (possibly combat work as a mercenary). however he’s not as cold-hearted as he may seem, and he’ll happily spend a day of leave breaking into your penthouse

so that when you return in the evening, he’s there sat on an armchair, grinning smugly, “man your security’s turned to shit since i left.”

shortly followed by, “miss me?”

jason silver

jason’s the quintessential bodyguard, cause, after all, having a very muscular 6’11 man follow you everywhere you go isn’t exactly subtle

but he’s recognisable for other reasons as well.

like the fact that he’ll accompany you to formal balls, and he’ll be the only man there with an undone tie - it’s such a massive argument trying to get him to wear an appropriate suit instead of his usual hoodies and sweatpants, that can anyone blame you for not having the energy to insist he stops undoing his tie as well?

he’s also not exactly one for professionality. like you’ll be minding your business, trying to network, and suddenly you’ll hear a wolf whistle by your ear and a “wouldn’t mind me a bit of that”

“jason, that’s the ambassador to norway. we’re having her over for dinner next week, so, with all due respect, shut the fuck up. and whisper next time, for heaven’s sake! what if someone had heard you?”

“shit, is it a crime to like some nice tits in this economy?”

and when you glare at him, genuinely furious, he grins, puts his hands up, and says, “sorry, sorry. forgot you don’t like me having eyes for anyone else, boss.”

but don’t get me wrong, jason’s not all evil contra to fujimaki’s propaganda

he is an incredibly good bodyguard - those animal instincts really help him out when it comes to getting you out of a sniper’s line of sight, or saving you from a bullet, or just assessing a room for potential entry points. and he packs a mean punch if anyone tries to try something on you, a solid ko.

no one’s getting past him essentially

the only problem is that it’s incredibly difficult to thank jason for saving your life, cause the last thing he needs is an ego boost or feeling like you owe him.

“seriously jason. i don’t know how i can ever repay you.”

“usually the payslip’s enough,” he smirks, “but you know that little lady ambassador-“

unsuprisingly, he’s not invited to the dinner.

[toxictoad]

In furtherance of my agenda to make Tavs that are sorta cringe but that I love...

Wouldn't it be fucked up if Tav was Gale and Mystra's kid but he never knew about them until they both get tadpoled. Like wouldn't that provide so much potential for angst

(Obscenely long rant about my take on this under the cut, as I tend to do. Also trigger warnings for SA adjacent topics, grooming, brief pregnancy mention, parental neglect, and suicidal thoughts (Of the 'I wish I didn't exist' variety). I'll tag things accordingly)

As a member of the "Fuck Mystra" brigade (As we all are) she's gonna suck as a mother and a lover and all, HOWEVER, for the purposes of this post, I'm making Tav 19, because that's young enough to make a certain amount of sense (Forgotten Realms lore being put to the side for a moment) and making Gale 37, because even if you subscribe to the idea that Mystra was a nonce I don't feel like going there right now. Okay? Okay.

That being said; Mystra only wants a kid for like shits and giggles. Kids are inconsequential to a goddess and she doesn't tell Gale because who fucking knows. Maybe she thought if he had someone other than her to care about he would realize she sucked or something.

So Gale just never learns that he has a whole ass child out there for whatever reason.

With the math Tav (I named him Cosmos because I can do whatever I want) is born when Gale is at least 18, and deities are weird so I imagine that pregnancy is either not like a noticeable physical thing or it's accelerated or there's just something ephemeral about it, so it's not like Mystra is gone or actually physically pregnant or anything.

I think it would be funny if she just gave the baby to Elminster and was like "Hey I'm your goddess so you have to raise my kid also don't tell Gale bye" Because like... He's fucking Elminster. He's an immortal archmage and one of the most powerful people in the Forgotten Realms, and now he has to take care of a baby?! He doesn't know how to do that! He doesn't know what babies need! And what is he gonna do when this thing gets older?!

(Yes I know that Elminster has canonical children but as far as I can tell he didn't raise any of them so it tracks probably)

So Cosmos is raised by Elminster and grows up in a hazardous wizard tower and gets taken on perilous adventures in one of those baby slings because I think it's funny. Also, I think that Cosmos is a sorcerer and it lowkey pisses off all of his weird fucking parents. Cause he's an Aasimar. A child of a goddess. His blood is hella magical and he has an ego about not having to learn spells and shit. He has Gale's disposition but also he has actual charisma to back it up and it's a terrible (Read; Funny as hell) combination.

The result of Cosmos having actual charisma, confidence (Highkey arrogance), and skill is that he is... Well, he's a lush. Not in any practical sense because he is a teenager and lives with a bajillion-year-old man, but like... He's the guy from your high school who was nice enough but also he had a new girlfriend every week and does a little too much partying. He's a playboy and we support him in that endeavor. It really is a miracle that he isn't super obviously weird because he was raised by a cooky old wizard, never knew about his father (I think when he asked Elminster would just tell him he didn't know, because he does care about the kid and doesn't want to burden him with the knowledge), and got a visit from Mystra like... twice. She's literally your dad who texts you every six months and doesn't remember your birthday (I hate her so much).

But somehow he's kinda well-adjusted, and he moves out of Elminster's tower to go do sorcerer things and maybe go on adventures, who knows?

And then he gets fucking tadpoled.

And at first, it's like "Okay, I'm definitely adventuring now. Maybe it wasn't planned but I'm gonna be alright" and then he meets a wizard who was stuck in a rock and is obviously a devotee of Mystra, and he's like "Oh, okay. He could be cool to have around. The dynamic is a little weird but fuck it we ball" and then the wizard is like "Hey I need to eat magic or I'll explode can't tell u why tho" and that's a little sketchy, but he likes the guy and doesn't want him to die, so he gives him his magic shoes.

And things go... Well. He gets the hang of this whole adventuring thing and saving people is pretty cool, actually. And he does kind of indulge in the wizard/sorcerer rivalry because he thinks it's funny, but ultimately he just... likes these people, even if they're all kinda keeping secrets (Him included, because how in the hells is he supposed to unload all of that Mystra baggage to his new tadpole buddies?)

He's the youngest but Lae'zel and Wyll are close enough in age that they get kind of clique-y (I'm a Wyll simp so they're gonna end up married sue me)

And then the tiefling party happens, and he talks to Gale... and oh my god this is so awkward I do not wanna hear you talk about my estranged goddess mom. And like he indulges Gale in his magic trick but the whole thing sets off some warning signs that he's like... HM.

And he isn't sure yet, but he thinks that, maybe, Gale might be his father.

And that is just... Ah. That is both kind of cool and also makes him a little sick.

Because he doesn't know everything, but he does know that Mystra is maybe not the best when it comes to mortal men. And he might've been born out of some stuff that was ethically dubious at best.

So he has the brilliant and not at all stupid plan to never tell anyone ever.

And he tries his absolute hardest to not talk to Gale at all the entire time they're going through the Underdark (The order of the adventure is optimized for maximum drama). Everyone notices but he just... pretends that absolutely nothing is wrong and Gale eventually comes up to apologize like 'Hey man sorry if I was like too much :(' because he's a sweetie and will feel bad about things that are not his fault. And Cosmos tries to say that it isn't about that but it also kind of is, so he just accepts the apology and goes back to being a bit of a dickhead.

And the party is getting ROCKY by the time they get through the Underdark. Everyone knows some shit is up but they also all have their own issues so it's a mess. A hot goddamn mess.

...And then they go through the Mountain Pass... And Elminster is there...

And Cosmos sees him and wants to turn around SO badly but that would be weird and then Elminster sees him...

I cannot paraphrase this accurately to my vision so have a snippet of writing here;

*****

He feels like he might anxiety vomit, but hopefully, it doesn’t show on his face. Gale walks a little faster and waves, “Elminster. Fancy running into you here”

And he doesn’t look very surprised to see the younger wizard, but he does look surprised to see Cosmos. He prays to every deity he can think of that Elminster says nothing.

But who the fuck listens to prayers anyways.

“Gale, my boy… I have some, um, business to attend to with you, but…”

He turns his eyes onto Cosmos and he knows that his face goes white right then.

“How did this-?”

“I haven’t said it yet” He blurts out, swallowing bile, “And you aren’t going to”

Elminster blinks in surprise, glancing between him and Gale for a moment.

“What- You know Elminster?” Gale looks incredulous, and he wants to snark back with some taunt about wizards and sorcerers and useless teachers but he just bites his tongue and nods. He is… so fucked.

He and Elminster are locked in some bizarre staring contest, and Cosmos communicates as much as he can with his eyes that he will try to punch an old man. They say nothing, and Gale is growing increasingly exasperated, “I’m sorry, can someone please explain what’s going on? What have you not said?”

He looks at Cosmos with sad eyes- the same way he’s looked since the Tiefling Party. He can see it out of the corner of his eyes, but he doesn’t acknowledge the words. Cosmos grits his teeth and feels his breath catch in his throat.

“Camp. Now”

He is… so fucked.

*****

And then the big reveal happens and Cosmos is emotionally stunted and maybe has a panic attack or something and runs away for an hour and Gale finds him and tries his best to be an awkward dad. It works, somehow.

And then Cosmos finds out why Elminster was there, and...

Well in short he decides that he's going to punch his mother in the face. Divinity be dammed. It's an incredibly awkward situation at best, but fuck, man. He actually likes Gale- his dad- whoever you are- and immediately jumps on the 'Fuck Mystra' Train. He just got this parental figure and you want him to blow himself up? Yeah, no. Not happening. He has no mother anymore.

(Sidenote; I think that concurrently with all of Cosmos' shit Astarion and Gale would have a thing. This is mostly irrelevant but at some point, Cosmos is like 'Bloodline ended with Mystra. Astarion is my mom now' because it would be funny. Astarion can't take care of a child but he CAN be a weird step-dad to an adult child and give advice about how to get blood out of cotton shirts)

And Gale reacts... more or less like he does in canon, but it's a little different because like... Shit, this is his child. His child who... doesn't want him to blow up. He's devoted to Mystra, but I think an inkling of doubt would emerge with that. It's a little strange, finding out that your companion who you thought was just uncomfortable around you is actually your son with your ex-gf/goddess who is now righteously angry on your behalf. It feels... kinda nice, in a weird way.

I think Cosmos has enough charisma that he can make things sort of not awkward. He just makes jokes about Gale being his dad and everyone is just like 'Well I guess this is how things are now?'

Gale doesn't know how to be a parent, much less to an adult child who also has Mystra baggage, but fuck it if he doesn't try. Awkward conversations about love interests ensue (I like to imagine Gale trying his hardest to give Wyll a shovel talk but it ends up as just him and Wyll having a nice chat. He's trying to be intimidating, dammit!)

I do think Gale would have an 'Oh shit' moment at some point in the Shadow-Cursed lands. If Cosmos gets too low on health, or gods forbid if he has to be revived? Maximum angst potential there. Maybe it makes him start to realize how valuable his life is or something who knows.

Cosmos yells at his dad for even considering blowing himself up at Moonrise Towers (He says sorry later, but still)

A lot of Act 3 is getting through awkward conversations tbh. But it's good for them. But Gale's confrontation with Mystra... Oh boy.

Like Cosmos obviously doesn't approve of the whole crown of Karsus thing, but more importantly; he will scream at Mystra for as long as Gale will let him. Some very choice words are thrown around. But also (And this is where we get some of my own indulgence in angst) I think during this... very amicable conversation between adults... Cosmos would end up saying something akin to 'I wish I was never born' and... Oof. I don't think he would realize it at first, and Mystra wouldn't really care, but it sticks with Gale.

Like the man just kind of realized that his life means something other than benefitting other people, and now he hears that? Heartbreak. Immediate heartbreak. He doesn't know how to broach the subject and just ends up standing around Cosmos' tent until he finally asks what's up.

Cue Gale blurting out that he's glad Cosmos exists and that he wouldn't change any of the bs with Mystra because even if it's new and awkward he's his son and that means something and he doesn't want him to think about his own life the way Gale did and-

Cosmos... genuinely does not know what he's talking about at first, but when he gets it he's just like... Oh, that? Yeah no I just wish I didn't exist because I hate the way that I was made and it feels like my existence hurts you lmao

I think that Cosmos legitimately does not realize that most people don't feel that way sometimes. Like he knows, but he doesn't really internalize that there's something "wrong" with the way he feels

And... Okay why is Gale crying what did he say oh shit-

He had to hammer it into Gale's head that he's deserving of life and love, and now it's Cosmos' turn! Get loved, idiot

(I have so many feelings about so many other bits of Act 3 but this is SO long now so I'm just gonna skip to the epilogue or I'm never going to post this because I just keep adding things)

So Bloodweave happens, because tbh I don't see Gale with any of the other companions in this scenario (Spawn Astarion, obvi) and... look, I LOVE Karlach and I love Wyll's Blade of Avernus ending, but I just want them to be a weird fucked up little family, okay? Karlach got a Deus Ex Machina and her heart is fine for some reason in this case idk.

I just really like the idea of Wyll and Cosmos adventuring around the Sword Coast and occasionally popping into Gale's tower in Waterdeep to visit. The dynamic between Gale, his morally grey Vampire boyfriend, his dumb magic son, and his dumb magic son's hero husband who is also his friend is just... Mwah. Chef's kiss. Weird gay family over here I love them. Wyll's father is so confused. Christmas dinner is insane. Morena Dekarios is thrilled to have a grandchild. Tara is basically Cosmos' aunt. Withers is there sometimes. It's pure chaos and I can't get enough of it.

[chuuyasfanboy]

HII!! Could you do one with Dazai, Chuuya and Atsushi reacting to a reader who has one of those SHTWT accounts? It's a kind of strange request, but I've never seen anyone talk about it!!

I actually loved your blog, I'm currently hooked! <3

NOT a weird request at all! I dont have any social medias like this, but I interact with edtwt and have friends with both edtwt's and shtwt's, so I think I'm comfortable enough talking about the issue!

Now this may be very hypocritical of me BUT IF YOU ARE STRUGGLING MENTALLY PLEASE REACH OUT FOR HELP! Here's a link to a website with hotline numbers! Even if you cant get yourself to stop completely, please at least be save enough to keep living. Love you all mwah<3

https://www.pleaselive.org/hotlines/

Definitely didn't skip a matchup request to write this... Promise I'll get to you soon other person! I've had some ideas in mind heheheh

Dazai, Chuuya, and Atsushi (Seperate) x shtwt!Reader

Tw: Sh tw, mentions of edtwt in the ooc lol, spoilers dazai totally has a shtwt too</3

Dazai Osamu

Starting off with the worst reaction

Why is he the worst, you ask?

He has one too!

He totally followed you by accident because he just found this all so inspirational. And then you posted a tweet with the same joke you'd made earlier that day.

And oh he knew.

He's mad, but mostly because you never told him you were struggling.

He's the one who's supposed to be masking his emotions, damn it!

(I'm not sure if shtwt is the same way, but i know edtwt is chock full of motivational disgusting food images posting! I'm making those assumptions that its similar lol)

He definitely tries to convince you to get help, and he feels really bad for not actually being that worried.

He trusts you to keep yourself safe enough and so eventually he just gives up on the notion altogether

It doesnt take long for the two of you to be a bit more open with it all

He finally shows you whats under those bandages

It's worse than you think.

You're the one who convinces him to properly treat his cuts, and after enough bothering, you finally let him treat you the same.

Late nights when the two of you cant sleep, and he comes over.

The both of you in each others arms, disinfectant and fresh rolls of bandages discarded on the nightstand

While he may not be the one you go to for support, he definitely wont judge you for anything, not even a bit

And if you do decide to finally get help, he's there to cheer you on

Dont be fooled though, he wont be changing his ways at all

Good luck getting this stinker to find value in himself!

Chuuya Nakahara

He's got the best reaction, by far

He's trying not to judge you, really

It's not something he's ever had to struggle with these things, and the furthest he can really give you is an absurd amount of sympathy

The little experience he does have comes from his years with Dazai in the port mafia, but that was a long time ago and he hasnt had to think of it since

It brings up old memories...

You'd left it open on a private tab one night, and he found it when you asked him to look up something

He's about ready to cry, really, but he's strong

For you

He encourages you to get help, professional help

And if you decline, he doesnt push it much further

Instead, he offers you help directly

He cofiscates your razors the best he can, but he soon finds you manage to get them anyway

So he comprimises

When you forget to clean them, he does it for you

Buys you disinfectant and fresh bandages every time he knows youre running low, keeps your first aid stocked

Things like that

He politely asks to not be shown any fresh wounds, twitter post or not, and does his best not to think about the fact you post these things so openly and he hadn't even known

If you do decide to seek help, he's the most supportive.

He keeps you on your recovery plan, holds you close if you relapse, and never passes a single word of judgement your way

He's here for you, always

Atsushi Nakajima

Akutagawa found it before he did

Atsushi was told, immediately

He PANICS, and as soon as he sees you he pulls you aside

And he just cries into your arms

You're left so confused like?

What????

He understands why you didnt tell him, and he doesnt blame you for it

But he's still pretty upset

Moreso with himself than you

Again, like the other two, you'd been posting pictures of it all online and he had to be told!

He insists you get help, and he wont let up on it

Reminds you every day after a nicely times good morning text

"If you're feeling down make sure you call somebody before you do anything, okay?"

He's practically on his hands and knees begging you to unfollow the shtwt's you've bombarded your feed with

Suddenly he's terrified of looking over your shoulder at your phone, but also so afraid every time he isnt

He's really not good at sorting it out, his brain is scrambled and he's panicked every time he thinks about it

But he really does try hard to stay positive

And while one or two things he says may unintentionally come off as judgement, a good majority of his opinions on the topic is really just trying to get you help

He makes an alt account just to keep tabs on your shtwt

Its really obvious, made a day ago and following only you

You don't tell him that though<3

[221bshrlocked]

don't you know

Pairings: Echo x afab!Jedi Reader

Words: 11,920 (it was meant to be shorter but as always, my hands slipped)

Warnings: Mutual Pining. Echo being extremly nervous and flustered around you. The classic "we need to kiss to avoid being seen" trope. Heated Make-Out Session(s). Love confessions. Some low self-esteem thoughts from Echo's perspective. Reader worshiping Echo. Biting. Slight Dirty Talk. Fingering. Penetrative, Unprotected Sex (wrap the shlong before you king kong my dudes). Creampie. Echo is less nervous by the end.

Prompt: "It reminded me of you."

Summary: Echo is well aware that he should break the kiss to see if the guards are still around, but he can’t get enough of you, and the sweet taste of your lips as you meet his devotion with similar passion. He shifts you in his arms until his thigh is planted perfectly against your heated core, and without thinking much of what he’s doing, he moves his cybernetic arm down your back, pushing you against him until you feel the pressure of his hard thigh in between your legs. You break the kiss and throw your head back, whimpering his name repeatedly until he silences you with a hard bite to your jugular.

A/N: @imarvelatthestars, sweetheart...surprise!!! Here you go, I hope you enjoy this as much as I did writing it. This is also my first time writing for Echo so I pray I did him justice. Comments and reblogs are always welcomed and appreciated. P.S. this is my second submission for the @cloneficgiftexchange and I do apologize for posting it late. I was very reluctant since he is a character I never thought I'd write for. Only one more to go though :D

As much as he hated to admit it, Echo was glad he was the one who came on the mission with you. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust his brothers with your life, far from it. It was merely anxiety-inducing to think of you and one of the Batch members in the current predicament. Then again, if it weren’t for the pitstop he took, a rather unnecessary one now that he thought about it, neither of you would have been running for your lives from the guards stationed near the market. He meant well, he really did, but looking back now, Echo knew that he was the reason your life is now in danger. 

And he didn’t like that one bit. 

He glances behind him briefly before looking ahead, seething with anger when he notices you slowing down to his pace. 

“Not to make light of our current problem, but I really do want to taste those weird looking fruits we saw back there when-”

“Not now!” Echo snaps harshly at you, ignoring the adorable pout you give him as he speeds ahead and turns into a much narrower alley. He knows he’s unjustly taking out his anger on you rather than owning up to his mistake, but he can’t even look at you for longer than a few seconds without his mind thinking of more intimate circumstances where you’re breathing heavily and groaning his name. He shakes his head to rid his mind of the consistent and rather irritating inappropriate thoughts of you, forcing his focus on the winding streets in front of him as he tries his best to lead you away from danger. 

When you reach the end of the alley, you find yourselves looking out into an awfully busy street, with many of the locals congregating around the entrance of a brightly-lit building. Echo scans the area, trying to figure out what the best plan is before the guards grow closer. He knows you won’t be able to get into any of the nearby places with how the two of you look, and he also knows you can’t go back where you came from. He turns to you and sees you looking behind you in preparation for the guards following you, and before he can think twice of what he’s doing, he grabs your hand and runs towards the busy establishment, murmuring apologies to anyone he bumps into as he makes it to the end of the line and hides behind a larger group.

He slams you more aggressively than he intends against the wall, completely shielding your body with his own so you wouldn’t get hurt should you be spotted. Echo looks down once and finds you staring into his eyes with quivering lips, and for a split second, he thinks you peer at his chapped lips before returning your gaze to his eyes. 

No, it can’t be. 

He turns away instantly, afraid of what he might do if you continue to look at him with such dangerous inclinations in your eyes. His mind is running a million miles a minute, and he doesn’t realize how hard his grip is on your waist until you shift beneath him and bring your hood up. So busy trying to figure out how he can extract the two of you from this situation, he doesn’t register the sudden fall of rain until the patrons around you laugh and scream as they try to cover themselves from the harsh weather. 

He blinks rapidly to get rid of the water collecting around his eyelashes, lightly banging his scomp on the wall beside you when he sees the guards filtering from the alley and surrounding the area. 

“Hunter, we’re surrounded. Where are you?” Echo hisses through his commlink, turning away from the guards so he isn’t recognized. He thanks the maker that the group beside him didn’t bother moving away, the cover they were giving the two of you the only reason why you haven’t been shot at yet. 

“Trying to come to you without drawing too much attention.” You hear Hunter give orders to Tech before he goes silent again, and when you try to look past Echo to see the guards, he moves with you and shields you from the open space. 

“Echo,” you try to warn him, but he shakes his head and pushes you further into the wall. This close, you can almost feel the beat of his heart, but you find that you don’t really need to feel it to know how nervous he is. You aren’t sure if he’s nervous for your safety, or from being so close to you, but you find it endearing regardless. It surprised you a little to see him so protective of you, seeing as he rarely ever spoke more than a few words to you at a time, and constantly went out of his way to avoid being in your vicinity for longer than necessary. 

“Quiet.” Again, Echo snaps at you, not wanting to be distracted by the sweet sound of your voice as you call his name or the heat radiating off of you as you slowly bring your arms around his waist. 

“There’s no way out…is there?” The soft question fills the small space between the two of you, and Echo is no longer strong enough to ignore how perfect you fit in his arms. He shifts his gaze to your eyes, and furrows his brows at you, slowly grazing his scomp across your cheek until he feels you nuzzle into the cold, hard end of the link. His breath hitches all of a sudden, unbelieving of how easily you sought out the steel material for safety. He can’t help but study you closely, finding himself feeling jealous of the water droplets adorning your skin. Unlike him, they were touching you so intimately, rolling down your cheeks and neck until they disappeared beneath the edge of your shirt. Echo is shivering, but he knows it has nothing to do with how soaked he is from the cold rain, and everything to do with the familiarity you were offering him in such a pivotal moment. 

“I’m not going to let anything happen to you, mesh’la.” Echo knows better than to offer you such a promise. You are an exceptional Jedi, one that he’s seen accomplish much in the past few months. It was quite pathetic to think that he could ever be better than you or that you needed him to keep you safe, but something about the way you smile at him, and how you wrap your arms around his waist to bring him closer, makes him say those words. He hopes you can see how genuine he is, and just as he’s about to apologize for putting you in this situation, he hears the guards move closer to the two of you. 

Turning his attention to the several, heavily armed men walking towards the busy line, Echo looks around to try and find a solution, only for his eyes to land on a couple making out not too far from you in line. He narrows his eyes at them before looking down at you, finding your gaze as unwavering as ever, and staring at him as if your life depends on it. 

“Kriff, I have an idea but-” He begins to say but you cut him off immediately, and Echo isn’t sure if he’s thankful or irritated that you didn’t give him a chance to finish his thought. 

“I don’t care.”

“Do you trust me?” He doesn’t even know how he can put his plan into words before he carries it out, but as he grows closer to you, he understands that there’s no time to explain anything. So instead, he waits for your response and prays to the maker that you don’t leave him if his idea works and the two of you survive. He doesn’t want to lose you, ever, and the thought of how you could potentially react when he finally closes the space between the two of you makes his heart skip a beat. 

“With my li-” As soon as you give him your consent, Echo wets his lips and crashes his chest into your own, pushing the hood back down your neck until he has complete access to your hair. He lets go of your waist and grabs the hair at the nape of your neck, squeezing it tightly to tilt your head to the side so he can deepen the kiss and block you from the guards’ line of sight. 

He hears you gasp into the touch as soon as you feel his lips on your own, and even though he wants to open his eyes to see your reaction, he doesn’t think he’ll be able to withstand your facial expression if it conveys an ounce of disgust. Echo doesn’t have to think too much on it though, because he feels you relax in his embrace, nearly toppling over into him from how hard you clutch his side and try to pull him close into you. He groans into your mouth, and his muscles shudder with need when he feels you slip your tongue past his lips and seek him. 

Echo is well aware that he should break the kiss to see if the guards are still around, but he can’t get enough of you, and the sweet taste of your lips as you meet his devotion with similar passion. He shifts you in his arms until his thigh is planted perfectly against your heated core, and without thinking much of what he’s doing, he moves his cybernetic arm down your back, pushing you against him until you feel the pressure of his hard thigh in between your legs. You break the kiss and throw your head back, whimpering his name repeatedly until he silences you with a hard bite to your jugular. 

The world seems to fade away then, leaving the two of you completely lost in each other. You bite into your lip to quiet down, roaming your hand up and down Echo’s side while the other reaches for his neck to bring him closer to you. He obliges instantly, sucking and kissing along your neck until he can taste the natural scent of your skin on his tongue mixing with the droplets of rain glistening across your heated flesh. Although he wants to push you away so you don’t feel the dents and wires running from his skull down to his spine, he can’t find it in himself to stop, not when he finally had you so willing and submissive in his arms. Echo wants more, more of your sounds, more of your little hiccups, more of your voice as it whispered and moaned his name while he pleasured you. 

But the moment ends abruptly when the group Echo hid behind begins to laugh and holler in an attempt to get the two of you to escalate your touches. When one of them tells Echo to save it for the club you’re both presumably in line for, he detaches from you and stares you down, watching you closely to see if you were uncomfortable by what just happened. He gets lost momentarily when he sees your eyes glazed over and shut, lips bruised from how harsh the kiss was and hands shivering violently as you fisted your fingers in his clothes. He gulps nervously and lets go of you, but he doesn’t dare move too far away, wanting to still cover you with his body should things take a turn for the worse.

Against every ounce of his being, Echo looks away from you and glances to the side, widening his eyes in shock when he finds no guards in the vicinity. He scans the entire street, and when he’s sure you’re no longer in any danger, he gulps nervously and turns back to you. If it weren’t for the rain coming down hard on the two of you and momentarily distracting him from your expression, Echo would have sworn you were gazing at him with lust-filled eyes. 

“They’re gone.” He breaks the silence, and slowly lets go of you, not bothering to apologize for the way he touched you as he steps away and removes his thigh from between your legs. You lose your balance for a moment but right yourself quickly and reluctantly let go of him. 

“Oh.” He hates the way you’re avoiding his eyes now, and he hopes it isn’t because you were offended by him. He studies you closely, looking at every twitch in your features and every small muscle movement to try and figure out why you were shrinking in front of him and stepping back into the wall. 

Maker. 

He fucked up. 

“Let’s go before they circle back,” there’s nothing else he can say to break the awkward silence that has fallen over the two of you. Echo clenches his jaw tightly, fisting his hand several times before heading back to the narrow alleys. 

“O-okay.” He hears you whisper not a moment later but ignores the disappointed tone of your voice, wanting to get to safety as quickly as possible before things escalate once more. 

“Echo, come in.” Hunter comms soon after, and Echo waits until you’re right behind him before he responds to the rest of the group. 

“Here. We’re at the rendezvous point. Where are you?” He asks while looking around for any potential danger, refusing to look towards you for the sake of not being distracted again. 

“You’re not going to like this but, we can’t come to you. At least not now.”

“What do you mean not now?” He doesn’t mean to hiss at his brother, but he does anyway, ignoring the puzzled expression he knew you were most likely giving him. He’s never once spoken to Hunter in such a way, and he didn’t want to make a habit of it, but all Echo can think of is your safety, and the longer the two of you stayed out, the more likely it was for you to get hurt. 

“He means, the statistical likelihood that we will not be spotted by the royal guards is awfully low. If we were to come now, we would be putting the two of you in more danger.” Tech cuts in, making Wrecker mumble something or other about statistical likelihoods never being in their favor. 

“Karking hells,” Echo swears, shaking his head in irritation as understanding washes over him. Had it not been for the chat he held with that lady in the market, you would have already been on the Marauder heading out. 

“I suggest you find a place to lay low. Once we figure something out, we’ll let you know.” Hunter responds a while later, and Echo takes a few deep breaths to calm himself and clear his mind of any unnecessary thoughts. 

“Echo, can you hear me?” The clone leader speaks again, this time with a firmer tone, making Echo frown instantly and finally look at you. He finds you avoiding his gaze just as much, and he feels sick to his stomach for being the reason behind such a resigned look. 

“Yes, yes. Loud and clear.”

Echo shakes his head and moves behind you, silently telling you to move ahead of him so he can keep an eye out and have your back. He thinks of the best plan of action to take now, but there isn’t a single option that doesn’t have plenty of risks for the both of you. He continues walking, hand on the blaster hanging from his side in case the guards return again. 

So busy studying the street, Echo doesn’t notice you stop until he bumps into you, nearly tripping over your body and crashing onto the ground. You steady him immediately, clearing your throat when he lets out a whispered swear as soon as you touch his arm. 

“Why did you stop?”

“There’s an inn I saw a couple of buildings back.” You avoid making eye contact with him, and Echo misses the playful glint he always saw in your eyes whenever he looked into them. He wants to raise your chin so he can take a better look at you, but he knows the last thing he should be doing right now is touching you so intimately again. 

“The risk is too high.” All things considered, it’s a pretty good option, better than anything he thought of thus far, but he doesn’t want to think of staying somewhere where he isn’t keeping an eye on you, or worse, remaining in the same room as you for a whole night.

“Well, I’d rather be somewhere where we’re less noticeable. Don’t you?” You gaze into his eyes briefly, and Echo nearly loses his train of thoughts when he sees how dilated your pupils still remain. He stares at you for longer than deemed appropriate, clearing his throat awkwardly when he notices you shifting your weight from one foot to the other.

“Uhh, yeah…you’re right. L-lead the way.” He motions for you to go in front of him, and as your shoulder grazes his arm when you move past him, Echo notices your frown deepen. He doesn’t know what comes over him, but all of a sudden, you’re turning around and staring at him with what he can only explain as a hopeful look. He parts his lips to try and explain himself, but he quickly recognizes that you’ve only stopped because he had reached out to you and grabbed your wrist. Looking down at where he’s touching your bare skin, Echo shakes his head and snaps himself out of his thoughts, letting go immediately and shifting his gaze to your eyes once again. 

“I- sorry…I’ll follow you.” He hates that he can barely string up a proper sentence in your presence now, but he thanks the maker when you merely nod at him and make your way down the street. 

Neither of you says anything as you walk underneath the darker parts of town, completely avoiding the other’s gaze as well as those walking past you. Echo wants to break the awkward silence, but he knows he will either have nothing to say or may actually make the situation worse and say something idiotic. He stays close behind you though, and senses a strange feeling take over him every time he looks up and sees you move your line of sight away from him, as if he’s caught you staring at him. 

Unbeknownst to him, you’re trying your best to keep your emotions in check, but every time you slow down and glance at him briefly, your mind worries all over again and you think over what happened not too long ago. It’s only when you notice Echo’s eyebrows furrow and twitch as he catches up with your pace that you realize you were unintentionally transferring your anxiety to him. 

You halt in your steps as understanding washes over you, and Echo is at your side in the blink of an eye, hand on your back as he attempts to check on you. 

“Is something wrong? Do you sense anything?” Gone is the shy, embarrassed clone trooper that has been avoiding your eyes for the past thirty minutes, and you look up at him with tear-filled eyes, nearly asking him why he was so uncomfortable with you now when he had his tongue down your throat, enthusiastically, a while ago. But you see the worry etched on his features, and you stop yourself before you say anything, afraid that the question might make matters worse and push him away further. 

“Sorry no, it’s- it’s nothing. I’m just tired.” You can tell Echo knows you’re lying when he looks you over and doesn’t notice any signs of fatigue on you. He swallows the lump in his throat and removes his hand from your back, taking two steps back and looking out the street to see where the two of you are. 

“We’re here anyway, let’s get inside before anyone spots us.” You point across the street, and don’t bother waiting for him to acknowledge your comment before you’re crossing the street. You hear Echo sigh tiredly behind you, and although you want to tell him that everything is going to be fine, you know that he’ll see right through the fake comforting words and say something snarky in return. 

Best to leave it then…

“Hello,” putting on the best smile you can muster up, you call out to the theelin sitting behind a round desk at the center of the lobby. 

“Rates are behind me. No negotiation. Full payment upfront. Take it or leave it.” He doesn’t bother looking up at you, continuing to scroll through the holopad in his hand as he taps his foot on the desk and lightly moves back and forth on his chair.

“Good evening to you too.” Echo murmurs beneath his breath, but the man catches his remark and finally looks up at the two of you. You clench your fists tightly when you see him narrow his eyes at Echo, and you hope to the maker that he doesn’t say anything offensive to him because you are in no mood to play nice with anyone. 

“Don’t get snippy with me.” Echo must notice your hand moving to your lightsaber because he quickly slips his fingers around your wrist and tugs on it until it’s back on your side again. Taking a deep breath, you remember the purpose of your presence in the establishment and decide to hold out your patience for just a little longer. 

“I’m sorry for my boyfriend here, it’s been a long day and I made him walk around for most of it. We’ll take a room for the night please?” You quickly slip your hands around Echo’s arm, nuzzling into his shoulder in a dramatic show of affection, hoping that the man in front of you was stupid enough to see past the discomfort the clone trooper beside you clearly still held for you, and actually believe your poorly-told lie. 

“That’s 100 credits, sweetheart.”

“100 credits? This place isn’t even-” Echo steps forward and nearly goes on a rant, but the theelin throws the holopad aside and stands up.

“Want to make it 200, metalhead?”

If it were possible for you to see red so easily, you think you would have been blinded by it now and took the man’s head off before he can take in another breath. But something about the way Echo winces next to you brings you back to yourself, and you let go of him, not bothering for hiding yourself as you step towards the man and gesture with your hand at him. 

“You will give us the room for free.”

“I- I will give you the room for free.” He repeats not a moment later, and you can vaguely feel Echo’s shock through the Force, but you say nothing of it now, not wanting to draw any more attention to yourself. 

“You will allow us to keep the room until we no longer need it.”

“I will allow you to keep the room until you no longer need it.” He repeats once more, and you smile to yourself when he doesn’t blink once as he follows your orders and checks his data pad for the available rooms. 

“Give us the most secluded room you have here.” You order one last time, looking at Echo to gauge his reaction. You thought you would find him somewhat angry with you at using the Force for something so trivial, but instead, you find him smiling and shaking his head while scouting the room to ensure that you’re alone. 

“Seventh floor to the right. The code is 99731.”

“Thank you, and if it’s all the same, we don’t wish to be disturbed.” You fake another smile at him and move towards the elevator, but not before breaking the cameras hanging all around the lobby and the top of the elevator. 

“You will not be disturbed.” He whispers back as he sits down again and returns to his holopad, making Echo chuckle to himself before motioning for you to enter the elevator first. 

“Asshole…” You hiss at him and watch as Echo moves to the entrance to see if anyone is following you. 

“Come on, before anyone shows up.” You call to Echo, not wanting to remain out in the open for longer than necessary. The silence is back at full-force when he enters the elevator, but you sense that Echo isn’t as uncomfortable in your presence as before, and you sigh in relief at moving past whatever awkwardness that took over ever since he kissed you. The elevator signals your arrival, and your hand moves to your weapon immediately. Echo sees your reaction and holds his hand out, silently telling you to remove your hand from your lightsaber. You meet his eyes and blink at him shyly before resting your hand at your side, forcing yourself to look as relaxed as possible so no one around will suspect you of anything. 

Echo is first to get out, turning to the right and heading towards the only door on the floor. He waits until you’re beside him before pushing in the code, and as the steel door slides open, he steps to the side to allow you to enter first before he walks in behind you. As soon as the two of you are in the safety of the room, Echo locks the door and pushes his scomp through the keypad beside the holopad on the wall to ensure that it can only be opened from inside. 

“Hmm, it’s genuinely better than I thought it would be.” He hears you comment from behind him and turns around to study the room, his heart instantly dropping at the site of the bed at the edge of the space. His eyes shift to the large windows nearby and although he wants to marvel at the view from the room, his mind immediately returns to the small issue staring back at him. 

Of course there would only be one bed. 

“Yeah, except for-” Echo points at the bed, looking up at you and waiting until you follow his line of sight before he says anything else. 

“Except for what?” You ask as you take off your cloaks and fold them neatly before placing them on one of the chairs.

“That.”

“Ah, not keen on sharing a bed with me Echo?” You raise a curious eyebrow at him, unbuckling the belt around your waist, along with the lightsaber, and placing them on top of your robes. Echo watches you like a loth-wolf, eyeing your body for any signs of discomfort and finding it rather confusing that you were actually comfortable around him now. You were going to be alone with him for the next rotation, perhaps even more, and there was only one bed in the room, making this a much more intimate situation than he thought ever possible. 

“No, I mean yes…it’s n-not that I don’t want to, it’s just…I can’t.”

“Can’t or won’t?” You cross your arms, and Echo’s eyes shift to your heaving chest for a brief second before they return above your neckline immediately. He clears his throat once and clenches his fist tightly, pushing the socket of his other arm behind his back in an attempt to show you how much he really didn’t want to answer your question. 

“Right.” You notice his shy demeanor almost instantly, not from the clear shift in his body language, but from the way his Force signature changes to a much deeper shade of green than it usually is as soon as you ask your question. You say nothing else as you dismiss the whole conversation and shake your hand at him, walking around the room until Echo can see that you’re clearly disregarding whatever just happened for his sake. He’s quiet for a long time, and it’s only when he comes out of the refresher that you realize he’s left you all alone for a while, hence the lack of any noise from where you thought he was standing. 

“Tech has our coordinates.” He breaks the silence and you see from your periphery that he was waiting for you to acknowledge that bit of information so he can go about whatever he was planning on doing for the near future. 

“Okay.” Echo doesn’t know what he expected you to say, but it certainly wasn’t something as short and straightforward as this response. He can’t take his eyes off of you, and he wonders why you weren’t trying to get out of your drenched clothes. 

Kriff, of course you weren’t going to strip down to nothing when you didn’t have a change of clothes. If there was another room, you would have been much more comfortable and warmer already. His mere presence was an inconvenience to you and Echo mentally slapped himself for, yet again, being such a nuisance. 

If he were being honest with himself, however, he didn’t mind your state of attire at the moment. In fact, he enjoyed it immensely, especially since he could see your muscles through the thin material of your Jedi robes. His train of thoughts snaps him out of his haze and he chides himself for being such a creeper when you were most likely cursing the day you signed up to go on this mission with him. 

He thinks you’re going to meditate, but when you stand at the windows and look across the city, Echo decides then and there that he’ll use this moment to apologize for the events of the day, and maybe explain to you why he was the reason behind your current predicament. 

“Listen, I uhh…I wanted to apologize about earlier.” He approaches you slowly, hoping that he gains his voice quickly so his apology doesn’t come off disingenuous. You don’t acknowledge him until he stands next to you, and even then, you continue to stare out the window, not bothering to spare him so much as a glance. 

“What about it?” The tone of your voice calms him a little, but he feels his nerves rise when he begins to explain himself and watches as you slowly turn towards him, eyes aimed to your fingers as they fiddle together anxiously. Hmm, perhaps he wasn’t the only nervous one here. 

“I shouldn’t have stopped at the market. I should’ve been more aware of the guards watching us. If it hadn’t been for the time I wasted, we would be with the rest of the group by now.” Echo knows he may not be making a lot of sense, but when he finally looks at you, he finds a rather puzzling expression on your features. He thought you’d be irritated with him, perhaps even angry for him being the reason behind the chase around the city. 

“What? Why are you staring at me like that?” He asks softly, not wanting to make it seem as if you didn’t have a right to look at him in such a manner. 

“Nothing, it’s just…well, I thought you were apologizing for the kiss. I’m surprised that…ugh, nevermind.” His breath hitches when he registers your response, and just when he thinks you’re going to part with valuable words, you stop and turn away from him, facing the rain as it comes down harshly on the windows and prevents you from seeing the lights more clearly. 

“I- I want to apologize for the kiss too. I should have given you a heads up before I…before we, you know.” Echo takes one step towards you and nearly reaches out to grab your arm, but he senses that you may not want him to come anywhere near you now and holds himself back. He wants you to say something, anything, to what he just said. But when you remain silent, he knows that nothing he’ll say will push you to speak with him. As twisted as it may be, Echo thinks that he’d rather have you yell at him for jeopardizing your life and the mission than the quietness befalling the two of you again. 

Shaking his head, Echo reaches around and takes out the soft silk he’s kept tucked safely in his bag for the better half of the night. 

“Here, I got t-this for you.” He turns the fabric over several times, letting it slide easily off of his cybernetic arm before holding it out to you. Echo thinks you will probably ignore him again, but to his shock, you face him almost instantly and look down at the soft silk intertwining in between his fingers. Looking into his eyes for a brief moment, you slowly reach for the scarf and take it from his hand, wrapping it several times around your fingers before letting it slide easily away from them and hang from where you’re pinching the material. 

“It’s why I stopped when we were scouting the market place. I saw it and…it reminded me of you. I thought it would look pretty on you, especially since it’s the color of your lightsaber and all.” Echo scratches the back of his neck nervously, the smile he throws your way filled with the kind of hope that makes his actions from earlier much clearer to your mind. You finger the material for a while, wondering how you could have been so oblivious to his demeanor towards you. There’s nothing you can do except raise the scarf to your face and rub it against your cheek, feeling the softness of the fabric and wondering if Echo’s touch would feel just as soothing to your heated skin. 

You look at him through heavy-lidded eyes and return the smile, waiting until his shoulders visibly relax before you throw the scarf aside and take a step towards him. 

“I have nothing to give you in return…” You whisper to Echo, eyeing him closely to gauge his reaction to the proximity between your bodies. 

“That’s okay, mesh’la. I didn’t do this for-” He begins to say but stops when he sees you growing even closer before resting both of your hands around his shoulders. He stops breathing and stares at you without blinking, praying to the maker that this wasn’t one of his dreams, and he was, in fact, feeling the touch of your skin on his yearning body. 

“Except perhaps…this.” It’s the only warning Echo receives before you stand on your tiptoes and nudge your nose against his own. He parts his lips to say something but you don’t give him a chance to so much as breathe, molding your lips with his own in a chaste kiss, one that reminds him of the first intimate touch he shared with you not a whole hour prior. He shuts his eyes, wanting to commit every little caress and moan to memory before you decide to pull away and leave him. 

But then you tilt your head to the side and deepen the kiss, and Echo knows then that he isn’t dreaming. No, this sensation felt too real. You were fisting your hands in his clothes, urging him to tower over you and return the kiss with as much fervor. 

Then he remembers what was just transpiring between the two of you and he breaks the gesture abruptly, pushing you away to try and ground himself before he looks into your eyes again. 

“Sweetheart, you don’t have to.” His voice is hoarse and he curses how easily affected he is by you. Expecting you to walk away from him, Echo looks down and pretends to focus on the ground so he doesn’t witness you leaving him. 

But he should have known that you’d never do what he expects you to. 

Without missing a beat, you throw your arms around his neck and bring your chest as flush to his own as possible, leaning into his space until your lips graze over his jaw and leave a trail of hot kisses down his neck to the little bit of his chest peeking through the damp clothes. 

“But Echo, I want to. I really really want to.” You break the silence and bite into your lips mischievously when you pull away and notice the way Echo is gazing upon you. He stares at your features for what feels like hours before he responds.  

“Yeah?” The question is completely unnecessary, at least that’s what you think, but you nod frantically to push aside any doubts the man in front of you is clearly having in response to your behavior. He slowly brings his arm around your waist and pushes on your lower back until there isn’t an inch in between the two of you. 

“Force only knows how much I’ve wanted you ever since I joined the group. I can’t stop thinking about you, and…when we kissed earlier, I thought the feelings were mutual.” It’s your turn to question his feelings, but Echo is quick to brush aside whatever spiraling thoughts your mind was giving itself away to, bringing his cybernetic arm to your chin and raising your head until he looks straight into your dilated orbs. 

“They are, oh sweetheart they are.” His exclamation hits you light a blaster shot, and you don’t blink once, wanting to look him in the eyes when you ask him the following question. 

“Then w-why did you apologize?”

“Because I thought I made you uncomfortable. I thought I forced myself on you…and I thought you’d never look at me again because of what I did. Cyare, I would do anything to keep you safe, to keep you near me.” The desperation overflowing from his aura seeps into his words, and you feel your heart skip a beat at the prospect of being someone so important to him. It was against your upbringing, your values, your beliefs. To rely on another so heavily and hold a similar effect on them. It was unthinkable. 

But here he was, laying down his soul for you to take without caring whether you could offer him anything in return. Little did he know, though, that you’d given yourself to him a long time ago. 

Letting go of him, you take a step back and slowly remove the remaining robes from around your shoulders, until you’re left in nothing but a thin shirt and pair of cargo pants. Echo watches you intently, unsure of what it is you’re doing until his eyes take in the way you unbutton your pants and let them drop to the ground. 

“What- what are you doing?” He’s nervous for a different reason now, and you smile at him to put his mind at ease, not wanting to overdo in case he isn’t ready to take such a monumental step with you. 

“You said you’d do anything to keep me near you.” You respond as if it was the most sensical action to take, and as you step out of your pants and play with the hem of your shirt, Echo can’t help but trail his eyes across your body, marveling to himself at the rippling muscles and scars adorning your skin. He’s dreamt of this moment so often that he lost count of how many times he woke up sweating and touching himself. But now that he is here, Echo understands that nothing, absolutely nothing, compares to you in front of him now. 

Breathtaking. 

“Yeah but you- you don’t have to…we don’t have to do anything.” It’s the opposite of what he wants to say, what he feels, but he doesn’t want you to think that he’s the type of man to take advantage of the circumstances and use you. Granted, he desperately wanted to give into the moment, but not at the cost of you thinking so negatively of him. 

“Echo, I want you to be with me.” You practically moan for him, moving into his space and grazing your fingers up and down his chest until his knees nearly give out. Echo throws his head back and purrs at the soft, teasing touches you were gracing him with, and when you call for him again, he knows he’s made up his mind. 

“Be with me.”

“Are you sure?”

“Absolutely.” You answer instantly, leaning up and kissing his jaw until he takes you into his embrace once more. He nuzzles his cheeks against your temple, taking in a long whiff of your scent until the only thing he can sense is you. 

“A-are you sure?” You ask with a hesitation Echo never thought you capable of, and he chuckles at the mind-boggling question before he leans back and meets your gaze. 

“I’ve never been more sure of anything else in my life, cyar’ika.” You attack his mouth soon after, swallowing his groans when he parts his lips and welcomes you in enthusiastically. You thought his shy demeanor would continue, but the deeper the kiss becomes, the more bold the clone trooper is with his touches. Whereas his hand was at a respectful spot earlier, you have to stop yourself from giggling against his lips as soon as you feel his fingers dig in the flesh of your ass and squeeze tightly. The wet clothes still covering you barely leave anything to the imagination, but you gasp all the same when Echo slips his palm inside your panties and slides his fingers a little further down until he can feel how wet you are for him. 

You tilt your head to the side and sigh his name as he continues to familiarize himself with your skin, and before you can register what’s happening, Echo is leaning down and biting harshly on your shoulder, snapping you out of whatever haze that’s fallen over you and forcing you to look at him. 

“Let me see all of you,” his pleading words are music to your ears, and you don’t waste another second, quickly discarding your shirt while he kneels down and lowers your panties. When he stands to his height, he takes a step back until he hits the cold glass windows, roaming his eyes down your body until he satisfies his mind’s eye with the image of your perfection. You bask in the attention he gives you, keeping your hands to yourself for as long as possible until you can no longer stand there without touching him. 

As soon as you grab the hem of his shirt, however, Echo snaps out of his haze and grabs your wrist to stop you from viewing him to your hungry eyes. 

“Wait, I-”

“Yes?” You frown at him but don’t follow through with your intentions, waiting patiently until he feels he can answer your question with ease. 

“I don’t think you want to see me. It- it doesn’t look good underneath all these clothes.” His response comes to you as a shock, considering how he seldom cared for his looks. The way he’s avoiding your eyes now makes you wonder if he always cared for his appearance but you just never noticed it, or if he was only so self-conscious due to the situation you found yourself in. You realize that you don’t really care why he thinks of himself in such a way, or why he thought you’d even care for something so trivial. Not wanting to push him past his comfort zone, you let go of his shirt and wrap your arms around his waist to bring him as close to you as possible. 

“Echo, I don’t care. I don’t care how you look. I want you for you…for your sweet words, and your kind heart, and your generous spirit. I want you baby, I don’t care for anything else.” You hope he can believe the genuineness of your words, or at the very least, see that you weren’t the type of person to care for such an insignificant characteristic. You don’t like how closed off his body language is, and you kiss across his chest and arms to soothe his anxiety so he doesn’t leave altogether. 

“But if you’re not comfortable with me just yet, then I will respect that. I won’t pressure you to do anything you don’t want to do.” The reassuring words wash over him like lukewarm water and he relaxes beneath your touch with each little peck you leave on his touch-starved skin, until he is sure you managed to mark every visible inch of him. Echo thinks he might lose his mind from how sweet you’re being with him, his breathing becoming erratic when whisper sweet words against his skin with every little kiss and touch you caress him with, 

“If you’ll allow me though, I will worship every inch of you…as you deserve.” You promise him as you circle your arms around his body and dig your fingers into his back, wanting him to be as close to you as possible so he can feel your honesty through the Force. 

“You- you truly want me this much, sweetheart?” He’s shaking in your embrace, and you chuckle in return at the oddity of the question. If only he knew how much you craved him. 

“Oh you have no idea,” you respond right away, not wanting him to think you’re laughing at his question, or worse, at his reaction. You pull back enough to take a good look at him, and you focus all of your energy on the space between the two of you, wanting him to know that you weren’t telling a single lie. He must be in tune with your intentions because his expression relaxes greatly when he meets your eyes and sees nothing but adoration aimed at him. 

“Then…I’m all yours.” 

“You’ll tell me if you don’t like something.” You want nothing more than to push him down and have your way with him, but you want him to know that you’ll gladly stop if you do something he doesn’t particularly enjoy. He was very much in control of the situation, and you desperately wished he believed that as well. 

“Y-yeah.” His voice is not as reluctant as before, but you get the sense that he was still shy, perhaps even afraid of the prospect of revealing his body to you. Not wanting to waste anothering moment, you take his hand in your own and lead him to the bed, softly pushing on his chest until he sits down and makes space for you in between his thighs. Echo gulps nervously as you trail your fingers across his flushed skin, only to cease breathing when you lean down and cup his cheeks, keeping him still beneath you so you can kiss his forehead and whisper more assurances to him. 

His hand gravitates to your thigh and he holds onto your leg to try and force himself to focus on your touches and nothing else. You continue to kiss his face as you bend over and grab the edge of his shirt, slowly pulling it up until he raises his arms for you to take it off of him completely. When you throw it aside and kneel in front of him, Echo rests his hand on your shoulder and wishes for the impossible.

He mourns the times he could have shared with you if you had just met him before Skako Minor. 

“Maker,” the sentiment brings him out of his reverie before he can dwell too long on the ‘what ifs,’ and he pouts at you when he sees the expression on your pretty features shift several times until a sense of somber anger lingers through and remains unchanging.

“I- I told you it didn’t look great.”

“Baby, if I could take away your pain, I would do it…in a heartbeat.” You don’t want him to misunderstand your reaction, and you apologize for everything that’s been done to him, moving into his space until you can rest your cheek over his heart. It beats wildly against your ear and you hope it isn’t due to fear or nervousness. Against your better judgment, you tap into his Force signature and sigh in relief as understanding dawns over you. 

Echo isn’t embarrassed to be seen by you but guilty, of what you are unsure. But you push on and rest your lips against his chest until his heart beats even harder beneath you. 

“Kriff,” he curses and slides his hand across your back to your neck, grasping it tightly to tilt your head so he can look into your eyes and thank you for being so patient with him. 

“You mean so much to me,” you smile at him, leaning into the possessive touch before giving equal attention to the rest of his broad chest. You keep your hands over his hips, knowing that things would surrey escalate quickly if you didn’t pace yourself and think of his comfort first 

“Ah…s-sweetheart,” Echo moans beneath you, his breaths coming in erratic when he feels your tongue slide over his muscles and leave a trail of your mark across him. 

“And I will never let anything happen to you…ever again.” Although the tone of your voice comes off a little aggressive, Echo knows that it is your sense of protection making you this possessive of him, and not something he should fear. You were among the most well-respected Jedi, and although he knew that the events of the night would not benefit you in any way, he chose to think over the fact that the Jedi Order no longer existed and how honest you would be with him if you truly didn’t want this. No longer able to keep himself sitting upright, Echo throws his head back and falls onto the bed when he feels your teeth graze over his collarbone. 

“Oh fuck, your mouth feels so good…please,” he hears you giggle sweetly at him as you stand up and straddle his waist. You don’t give him any respite however, attacking him with your tongue, and teeth and hands until he’s a shaking mess underneath you. He grabs your ass with his hand and rests the scomp of his other one over your thighs, unintentionally bucking his hips into your wet core as soon as he feels you rub yourself on him. He’s hard and wanting, incapable of thinking of anything else but the immense pleasure you were bestowing upon him. 

It occurs to him that he rather enjoys you taking what you want from him, and he wonders if you’d be willing to remain in charge until the two of you reach release. There’s something so inherently sexy about a powerful Jedi such as yourself descending to their basest of instincts just to reach that unimaginable pleasure, and he feels honored that he is the one to throw you over the edge so quickly. He never thought you’d react in such an unhinged, nearly violent way to him, but he can’t find it in himself to care, especially now when he could see you let go completely just to make him see the galaxies in your arms. 

“Tell me what you want Echo, I’ll give you anything you ask for.”

“I- I want you, love. Just you.” Echo manages to flutter his eyes open in time to see you move lower across his body, parting his lips in anticipation when you unbutton his cargo pants and reach inside to take him in your hand. He sucks in a harsh breath as soon as he feels the palm of your hand cup his cock and squeeze it tightly. When he looks into your eyes, he sees them glistening wickedly with such strong emotions that he nearly comes then and there. For some reason, he genuinely thought you’d be the type to shy away from such lewd displays of affections, but you prove him wrong again and spit in your other hand before sitting up to lower down the rest of his pants and free him from the confines of his clothes. 

“You already have me.” You whisper to him as you begin to bend over his body to take his cock in your mouth, but Echo shakes his head at you and grabs your hand, not bothering to give you any explanation as he pulls you up until you fall against his chest. 

“Come here,” he swallows your surprised shrieks with an intense kiss, refusing to let go of you even as you begin to jerk him off and tease the base of his cock with your soft fingers. Only when you reach lower and massage his balls does Echo finally break the kiss, groaning your name wantonly as you squeeze the tip of his cock while biting his neck and shoulder. You try to slither down his body again but Echo whispers a quick ‘no’ before grabbing your neck and keeping you against his chest. 

“But I-” you want to tell him that there’s nothing more you need in this world than to feel him hot and heavy in your mouth, but Echo doesn’t give you the chance to continue, once again calling your name sweetly so he can hold your undivided attention. 

“We have all the time in the galaxy, you can do whatever you want with me later.” He smiles at you when he sees you whine in disapproval, the expression throwing you off completely because of how rare it is to see it so genuine and pure. 

“But right now, I really want to feel your cunt wrapped around my cock.” His words shoot straight to your core, halting your actions in an instant and sending a wave of goosebumps across your skin. 

“Oh,” you look in between his eyes and briefly question whether they were always this light hazel color. All clones had similar physical features, even those in your crew. The differences were more pronounced amongst the Bad Batch for obvious reasons, but the color of their eyes never changed. 

But now that you were laying so close to Echo, you swear his eyes are different from the others. They rarely displayed strong emotions, and you think it’s because Echo often tried to hide his true feelings from the others around him so they wouldn’t worry too much about him. But looking at him now, you come to accept that his pretty gaze would always be a source of serenity and safety for you.

You want to tell him how much you love his eyes, how you’ll never be able to look into another’s so intimately, how honored you feel for being at the receiving end of such a loving gaze. But Echo surprises you suddenly as he lets go of your neck and expertly moves his hand in between your bodies until he graces your wet folds with two of his fingers. He moans against your cheek when he feels your slit gush for him, and as slowly as possible, he rubs your clit a few times to wet his fingers so he can slide them into your cunt with ease. You shut your eyes and call for him as you feel his digits fill you up, and Echo mirrors your actions from before, leaning up just enough to lick your neck before sinking his teeth into the space just above your clavicle. 

“Fuck sweetheart, you’re already so wet. Is this all for me?” He fucks you slowly with his fingers, the sound of your slick filling the night air becoming music to his ears. For a moment, he realizes that he should have probably asked you if this is okay, but he remembers who you are and how easily you could climb off of him if you didn’t enjoy his ministrations. You pray his name over and over again, and Echo swears this must be what heaven feels like because never in his life did he think he’d live to have you so desperate and submissive in his arms. 

“I- yes, it’s all for you Echo. You kissed me and…I- I’m always like this whenever you’re around.” Your confession fills him with pride, and he thrusts his hips against you to get some friction against his achingly hard cock. 

“Is that right?” Echo wants to ask more, but he knows his mind is running out of coherent thoughts the more you drench his fingers and mark him with your essence. To think that you were always so ready to take him by just being in his vicinity flips a switch in Echo’s mind and he picks up his pace, wanting to feel you come on his fingers before he can finally shove his cock in your cunt. 

“Yes…oh gods yes. Please Echo, show me how much you want me.” 

“I’m going to take my time with you…map every inch of your skin with my lips. I’ll never stop showing you how much I…how much I care for you cyar’ika.” Hearing him finally tell you how deeply he feels for you is enough to throw you over the edge, and you grab onto his shoulders while resting your forehead against his own as soon as your body gives into the pleasure and shudders from how hard the orgasm hits you. You want to tell him that you care for him as well, more than that if you’re being honest, but he doesn’t slow down and continues to twist and push his fingers against your tight walls until you can’t breathe any more. 

“Echo,” you call for him once, and a part of you wishes you didn’t say anything because he stops and removes his fingers from your slit. You can feel your juices coating his hand as he roams his palm over your back and drags your essence across your skin. Raising your head, you bite into your lips when you see the way he’s looking at you, and as you’re about to tell him those three fateful words you’ve been holding back for some time now, Echo pushes his hand between your sweaty bodies again and takes hold of his dick, teasing your clit with soft passes until you begin to roll your hips above him and coat his length with your cum. 

“You going to let me make love to you baby? You going to let me fuck you so deep till you can’t think of anything else but my cock?”

“Please Echo,” you’re not above begging, and you hope that Echo doesn’t wait any longer before giving in to his desires. 

“Kriffing hells, if I’d known it takes so little to get you moaning my name like that, I would have gotten on my knees and begged you to let me touch you from the very first time I laid my eyes on you.” He thrusts up into you, smirking at your reactions when he spreads your thighs wider and nudges your clit with the head of his cock. 

“Echo, I need you…now. You- you said we’d take our time later.” Again, Echo kisses across your neck as he pushes his dick against you, bringing his cybernetic arm around your back as soon as you fall over him and nuzzle into his neck. You bring your arms above his head and keep him in your embrace, rolling your hips along with him to entice him enough so he can finally put you out of your misery and take you. 

“You want my cock, little love?” The pet name does something to you, but you will yourself to not be distracted by his sweet words, wanting to hold all of your attention on feeling him beneath you. 

“Desperately.”

“Then you can have it,” the only warning you have is a deep, guttural groan emitting from Echo’s chest as he slowly pushes his cock inside your cunt, bringing his hand over your ass and applying enough pressure to keep you planted flush against him. 

“O-ohhhh…”

Neither of you move for what feels like hours, and Echo swears against your ears when you clench tightly around him and somehow pull him in deeper. 

“F-fuck,” he digs his fingers into the flesh of your back, refusing to have any space between your bodies out of fear of this being nothing more than a dream. 

“Move…please move.” You grind on top of him to test the waters, but Echo growls for you to stop, wanting to commit this moment to memory so he can revisit it whenever he feels particularly needy for you. 

“Hold on, just let me…let me feel you. L-let me feel all of you.” The way his voice breaks does something to you, and you obey him without a second thought, leaning up just a little so you can take a better look at him. You find his eyes tightly shut, and you caress his eyelids with your lips until they relax and slowly flutter open to see you. 

“Echo, you’re so good…so good to me.” You bite into your lower lip when your comment makes him push up into you, sending his cock into that special spot inside of you that makes you shake in weakness. 

“If you keep talking like that, I won’t last much longer sweetheart.” He warns you with a shallow thrust, and you hover your mouth over his lips when he sets a slow pace, shoving his cock in and out of you so gently and steadily until that familiar tight knot in your lower stomach begins to unravel again. 

“Kriff baby, you’re fucking hot…so tight ‘round me. So fucking good.” 

“And you feel so hard inside me…filling me up like no one else has before.” You lick his lower lip, giving the corner of his mouth a quick kiss before you rest your forehead against his cheek and start pushing yourself down on his dick, meeting his sweet touches with hard thrusts of your own. 

“Yeah? Tell me sweetheart, has anyone fucked you the way I do?”

“No…gods no.” You barely manage to breathe in between those words, making Echo chuckle at your desperation while struggling with his own.  

“Has- has anyone kissed you like I do?” He asks with hope and expectation, praying to the maker that you give him the answer he craves. 

“Never,” you nearly choke on your saliva when Echo begins to fuck up into you harder, the tip of his cock passing over your walls so deliciously that you swear you can feel ever ridge and ever vein on his dick the deeper he comes inside of you. 

“Fuck…fuck, ahhh- has anyone touched you how I do?” Echo is bordering on the edge of ecstasy, and you moan his name like a benediction when he stops for a second to enjoy the feeling of your cunt wrapped around him before he continues his rough thrusts once more. 

“No one Echo, oh fuck, please…right there.”

“Ner cyare, I- I…” He wants to say so much, reveal his heart’s secrets so he can finally know if you feel the same way he does. But the need to make you come on his cock outweighs everything else, and he pushes his nose against your jugular while wrapping both of his arms around your back to keep you as flush to him as possible. 

“I know baby, I know.” You’re shaking in his arms, hugging him tightly as you surrender to his ministrations. Something snaps inside Echo because he begins to fuck you with abandon until you can feel him and only him. 

“So close,” you whisper against his cheek, not knowing how to help him reach his own peak in return. He barely gives you the chance to push off of him so you do the only thing within your power, you lean down and kiss his temple while he fills you up over and over again. 

“Me too sweetheart, me too.” 

“Kiss me Echo,” his breathing is erratic but he obeys you instantly, molding his lips with your own in a hungry kiss until your senses are flooded with his touch and his taste and his presence. 

I love you Echo, so much. 

Your voice echoes in his mind for seconds on end, and Echo cums inside of you as soon as he registers what you just did. You swallow his moans as he shoots his seed into your cunt, filling you up with every hard thrust until he feels your walls flutter around him. You break the kiss as you climax, letting your head fall into his neck as you sob violently from the intensity of your orgasm. He’s managed to coax pleasure from your body in such a short period of time, but you get the sense that it was only possible because it is him. The fact that he’s head you wrapped around his finger for such a long time probably had some effect on you as well, but you pay those thoughts no mind as you slowly come down from your high and feel Echo make more of a mess of you when he pulls out and nudges his cock in between your damp bodies. 

You stay in each other’s arms for a long time, only deciding to move when your sweat cools down and makes you shiver. Ever the gentleman, Echo sits up while keeping you in his arms, somehow managing to maneuver the two of you around across the bed until you’re both laying down against the pillows. He pulls up the covers over your bodies, pulling you into his side and wrapping his arm around your back to keep you close to his heart. 

“About what I said, I- don’t think too much on it.” You break the silence all of a sudden, and Echo has to sift through everything you said to figure out what you’re referring to. 

“Hmm?”

“I don’t want you to think that you have to…you know, say it back.” It’s only when you say that last sentiment that Echo finally knows what you’re talking about, and he holds back the sarcastic comment on the tip of his tongue when he looks down and sees something akin to anxiety swimming in your eyes. 

“Don’t you know?” It’s a simple question, and Echo doesn’t leave the silence to linger for too long, wanting you to know that he cares for you as much as you care for him, perhaps even more. 

“I love you too mesh’la, with all my heart.” The revelation nearly sends your heart leaping out of your chest, and you can only smile and lean up to kiss him in response, unsure of whether you had the wherewithal to say any coherent sentence now. Echo in turn kisses the crown of your head, tracing random patterns across your shoulders when he feels you relax into him as the moments roll by. 

“Thank you for the scarf, and for thinking of me.”

“I’m always thinking of you, little love. You- you never leave my mind really.”

“Neither do you.”

The depths of your words reminds Echo of your identity, and he smiles down at you when he realizes that such a sentiment probably meant a great deal to you considering your upbringing and the rules you were tasked to follow since your childhood. He wants to ask you about your attachment to him, but he knows it’s not the time to do so, and he has no wish to ruin the moment by bringing up something so “sensitive.”

“So that thing you did, before I…you know.” Even though he just said the filthiest things to you, he shies away from saying anything crude now, mostly because he’s afraid it would come out more awkward than it sounds in his head. 

“Came?” You finish the thought for him and Echo winces briefly before nodding in agreement. 

“Y-yeah.” 

Something happens between his response and your understanding of it because all of a sudden, you’re sitting up and resting your hand on Echo’s chest as you apologize profusely to him. 

“Oh maker, did I- I made you uncomfortable, didn’t I? I should have asked before I presumed you’d…Echo, I’m so sorry. It didn’t ever occur to me that you wouldn’t be comfortable with that considering what happened on-”

“Cyare, sweetheart…look at me.” Echo sits up and tugs you into him, not caring for how the wires on his chest might hurt you as he keeps you against his chest rather forcefully and refuses to let up. 

“I didn’t mind it, one bit. On the contrary, I was going to ask if you can do it again.” He says quickly to avoid whatever misunderstanding that was about to unfold, only letting go of you when he sees you register his words in your mind. 

“Really?” Your expression turns from one of worry to shock, and Echo smiles at how easily surprised you can be. 

“It…felt nice, hearing your voice inside my mind I mean. I really liked it, made me feel so connected to you.” Echo roams his fingers down your neck to your sternum, moving them across your breasts slowly until he notices your nipples pebble beneath his touch. He’s distracted for a second when he flicks one peak with his thumb and makes you fall over him. 

“Because your cock fucking me so deep wasn’t connecting us enough?” You ask teasingly, giggling like a little girl when he sighs in irritation and falls back into the bed, taking you along with him. 

“And here I thought I could have a nice moment with you.”

“You know you’re enjoying this just as much.” You tilt his head so he can look at you again, tapping his nose twice and laughing even harder when he smiles and raises a curious eyebrow at you. 

“You got me there.”

“I’m glad you kissed me tonight.” You break the silence after a while again, looking into Echo’s eyes when he turns to his side and throws his arm over your waist. 

“I’m glad you kissed me back.” He’s about to tell you his brothers will be happy that he finally told you how he feels when your hand rolls down his chest and begins to reach for his slowly hardening cock. 

“Kriff sweetheart, as much as I want to go for round two, we should get some rest.” He stops you before things escalate, grabbing your hands and turning you around in his arms until your back is against his chest. 

“But-” You want to argue with him, but Echo is insistent, shaking his head and tugging you into him to try and distract you from whatever plan you had in mind. 

“Knowing Hunter and Tech, the plan won’t go as smoothly as they’ll plan it.”

“Fine, but I’m holding you to your word.” You warn him with a quick glance, only to pull away when you feel him kiss your neck and bite you playfully. 

“Believe me when I tell you, I’ll be counting the seconds until you touch me again.” His voice is hoarse, sending a new wave of arousal down your spine and making you wish you weren’t in need of rest. But he was right, and you knew better than to think that the plan would go smoothly. If the events of the night proved anything, it was that the unexpected and the impossible did not often go hand-in-hand.

“Good night sweetheart,” Echo whispers against your skin before he nuzzles against your neck, smiling to himself when you reach for his hand and intertwine your fingers together. 

“Good night Echo.”