#kinda hate this..

[uhhnoneemous]

Forgot to post this here! Happy Pride Month!

[teaboot]

Yeah Mr. Darcy’s proposal was a complete turd and a half but you gotta understand. You got your life together. A good career, stable income, retirement plan, all that shit together. And you meet this girl. And she’s everything. Clever, outspoken, funny, calls you on your bullshit. Grade A cutie, right? And she doesn’t go out of her way to spend time with you but she’s nice, and sometimes you catch her looking your way in a way that makes you think you might have a shot.

But her family. Holy shit.

First off, it’s p much ALL women, and mostly UNMARRIED women, which at this time means of something happens to her dad then you’re financially responsible for like. Four grown ass adults, potentially forever

Because mom in law is DEFINITELY gonna need someone to take care of her when dad in law kicks it, and they have like. NO money. So already you’re accepting that if all goes well, you’re gonna be one random old bag’s retirement home. That’s expensive and exhausting, yeah? Imagine asking someone on a first date knowing that if they say yes and things go good her high-strung chihuahua mother is gonna move in with you. IMAGINE.

And girly’s other sisters. Well, one is a sweetheart, yeah, so she probably won’t be an issue, but that still leaves three more, and two of those ones are INSUFFERABLE. Never went to school, dumb as rocks, spend cash like it’s toilet paper

And while one of the two is young still and might grow out of it the OTHER one is actively torpedo’ing her entire family’s reputation by wandering off with random dudes and chasing ass. She’s never gonna work, she can’t build connections, she’s a fucking sinkhole, and she’s being led on by the same goddamn con man ass leeching tit who’s been bleeding you dry while telling anyone who’ll listen that your family is full of ratty thieving bastards.

And if he dumps her after a week- WHICH YOU KNOW HIS BITCH ASS IS GONNA- you’ve got a SECOND UNMARRIABLE GROWN ASS ADULT TO PROVIDE FOR. And you KNOW she’s gonna be a tantrum-throwing little shit about it, and it’s not like you can lock her in the basement or something, you’re gonna have to bring her fucking. Everywhere. And give her an allowance and shit while she contributes zero, because again, she NEVER GOT EDUCATED AND HAS NO MARKETABLE SKILLS. She’s not even good to TALK to. FUCK

And you’re looking at this girl’s father like “please for the love of fuck get your spawn under control, marry them off, get them working on their résumé, learning to sew or be nursemaids or manage staff or SOMETHING, yall got no money and one foot in the grave” and that old man just laughs like “haha yeah, what can you do. lol”

So you’re looking to the mom and finally it’s making sense how she got that twitch in her eye and as MUCH as she is you’re starting to realize she’s the SMART one, desperately throwing her armloads of girls at random men like they’re a bunch of fucking lifeboats bobbing around a sinking ship, like yes Jesus Christ sweetly that life boat IS old and ugly and kind of boring but for FUCKS SAKE PICK ONE

And you look back at this girl who is ALSO REFUSING THE LIFE BOATS BY THE WAY and god damn it she’s still the most radiant thing you’ve ever seen so fine, fuck it, Christ alive, you’ll do it. You’ll shoot your shot. She’s everything you’ve ever wanted in anybody abut it’s not even just about that anymore, it’s about being her best fucking shot at a future, and even if she doesn’t like you all that much she’s still gonna say yes and that might break your heart a bit knowing it’s about the money but who knows, maybe it will at least be civil, or companionable, and even if she doesn’t LOVE you at least you’ll know she’s well and cared for

And so you’ll do it. You’ll take on the neurotic stress mess mother in law, the absent father, the broke ass wingnut no brain no money no future airhead sisters, the bad mannered relatives and the embarrassing behaviour and the impending future of sharing your entire shit with a clown parade of freeloaders, you’ll risk it all and accept the absolute certainty of financial ruin and emotional exhaustion for the rest of your whole ass life and you’ll make your own family deal with it too, you’ll do it, you’ll fucking DO IT, you stupid lovesick motherfucker

And so you go to this chick like “look. Your whole family’s a shitshow. You’ve got fucking nothing and you’re gonna die on the street. But for some reason- and I don’t get it either- I’ve fallen in love with you, and I wish I didn’t, but I did, so I’m telling you that whether you like me or not, I’ll give you everything. I’ll give you everything even if it’s the dumbest shit I ever done. Fuck my stupid Baka ass, I’ll marry you.”

And she looks at you- having heard or considered absolutely none of your months-long internal debate and monologue- and goes “The fuck did you just say about my family, you son of a bitch?”

And the shock of that is enough to jolt you back into a reality where you are able to actually hear and process what just came out of your damn mouth And yeah

Yeah, I think I kinda get it

[wolfythewitch]

mama

[guiiay]

yeah... yeah

[candyje11yfish]

just a little more

[hinamie]

growth // decay

[lovelenivy]

mouse bites™

[rexhaimer]

nowhere left to run

[raffi-cat]

red crowned crane grian

[technically-human]

First meeting

[deusfoundry]

thinking about calling up ex!sylus after a fight in some random alley in the n109 zone ends horribly. in your eyes, the world is spinning. you stumble into a wall and let gravity slide you down on your knees. and there's blood. so much blood. but you're alive, thankfully. you can't say the same for the five guys who ganged up on you.

you fish around your pocket for your phone, struggling to unlock it with your slick, red fingers. once you're in, instinct takes over reason. you call the one person you know will make it to you in time.

the phone rings once. twice. it's the most agonizing five seconds of your life as the pool of red on your feet grows bigger.

when his voice cuts through the silence, you waste no time in telling him what's happened to you.

you're far too gone to really consider the words you choke out. you can only hope that it's enough for sylus to find you as your vision goes dark and your consciousness slips.

he arrives in less than ten minutes, with the help of mephisto who he sent out to locate you.

his heart sinks when his eyes catch the trail of blood leading into the alley. he steps off his bike and runs. one defeaning thud of his boots on the concrete after the other.

he finds you soon enough. and with the state you've been left in, he's inclined to think of the worst.

sylus kneels before you. he wills his fingers to stop shaking as they inch closer to your neck. a weight is lifted off his shoulders when he feels your pulse that's barely there. it's weak, but it means only one thing. that you're alive.

he takes you back to his manor. large hands work to delicately patch you up.

you'll have much to talk about when you wake up—if the desperation in his voice as he begs you to keep yourself awake is anything to go by. if what you had uttered before falling unconscious (faint, broken whispers of i love you. the kind that he only used to hear in the dead of the night on his bed, with you in his arms) should mean anything.

[keferon]

Don’t mind me I just like to see him go bananas about cartoonish Autobot rules

Maaan…..if Prowl was in tfp he would spontaneously combust at least once a day

[beastlyidiocy]

when the 𝑓(𝑥) = 𝑎𝑥³ + 𝑏𝑥² + 𝑐𝑥 + 𝑑 😋

[thisdudedoesntexist]

Danny is a new technician at a rebuilt star labs. He didn't want to at first because Danny thought it would cut into his undead superhero/prince duties. Eventually though Clockwork (bullied) encouraged him and as it turns out, the lab is pretty lax about sudden "trouble at home". Plus, Danny can help set things back together when one of the Flashes messes up the timeline AGAIN.

(Flashpoint is what allowed Dan to come back as quickly as he did in the first place.)

The flash family, for lack of a better description, are straining. They're all putting up painted smiles that Danny knows aren't happening with his coworkers. Danny wants to be friendly with them but they're keeping him at a constant arms length away.

Barry, wally, Bart, and the rest of the flash family are freaking OUT. Why wouldn't they, their new technician caused the apocalypse. Granted they only know this because of an old speed scout from Bart. But it didn't have the time to tell them anymore than the name and some powers of one Dan phantom before fading. The timeline line the one man disaster's from doesn't exist anymore so they can't even check what happened or why the Dan destroyed everything. They can't even get rid of him because what if that sets off the guy!

[afternoonhorrors]

I'm done crying over someone like you! Hope you're feeling it too, now!

[curehaus]

Armand, Amadeo, Arun