#like no one fucks me like that butch fucks me

[vexingwoman]

Men like to claim that the only reason their violent crime statistics are so disproportionately high is due to their superior brute strength.

However, not only do the vast majority of violent crimes require little to no strength to commit, but I’ve personally been in the vicinity of many women whose brute strength was such that they could have killed me with their bare hands if they wanted. And yet I still felt safer around them than I did around the scrawniest, meekest of men. Somehow, I never once worried about these butch women assaulting me, or mugging me, or raping me, or committing the most heinous, necrophilic, counter-to-nature atrocities against me or children.

Furthermore, it’s extremely telling how, even according to that one notorious lesbian violence study that men obsessively throw around as evidence that female violence does increase when the strength disparity is neutralized, 85% of sexual assaults against lesbains are still committed exclusively by men (along with an entire third of domestic abuse). It’s almost as though brute strength isn’t the prerequisite to commit violent crimes, but rather, corruption and depravity are. Though of course men have to cling desperately to this one explanation, otherwise what the fuck would they have to say for themselves?

[jonahmagnus]

How I think the TOH characters would react to you asking their pronouns:

1) Luz Noceda

Start of season one: "Uh, she/her! I think."

By the end of season one: "She/her! For noww~..." *double pistols and a wink*

Season two: "She/they baby! What about you?"

Season three: "She/they, but I dont really care."

Post show: "Ehhh, call me whatever. Follow your heart! See where the wind takes you. Look into the sunset. Listen to the whistle of the sea breeze. The answer lies within your heart, you just have to listen" *leaves before you can figure out what the fuck that means*

2) Gus Porter

"He/they, thanks for asking!" Hes a gay ally at the start of season one, but only because he learned about how humans are opporessed for "being happy" in their realm and that broke his heart so much he swore to stand by any "gay" human he ever found. So he self-identifies as an ally dispite being literally bisexual. Luz considers explaining what gay means in human modern context, but decides this is funnier, and then forgets about it.

3) Willow Park

Start of season one: "O-oh! She/they, thanks for asking! What about you?" A little unsure of herself gender wise but is coming into it

By season two: "They/She! What about you?" *Winks* By this point shes grown into herself and identifies as nonbinary. However, hes still not ready to peer into the depths of his soul and acknowledge the true hidden truth at the bottom there. No little plant boy dont internalize that!!!!

Post-show: "She/he/they, thanks for asking!" This is still fully a lie but he plays cat and mouse with his own gender for a couple years after the show. Literally refuses to think about it. He has other shit going on (he doesnt).

Finally, post-post-show: "He/him! Yours?" He is a nonbinary butch womanthing. Thank god he finally figured that out. Amity and Gus quietly exchange their bet money. Amity won.

4) Amitt Blight

Season one: "She/her. What do you want." I loved her bitch era it was so fun.

Season two: "She/they! Uh, thanks... for asking? Am I supposed to ask for yours now?" Still figuring out the proper etiquette. God bless her soul.

Season 3: "Oh, she/they. You?" This social script is so ingrained in her autistic speech patterns and mind that she acidentally said it to a cafe worker once and she almost turned herself into goo. Rip autopilot girlie......

Post-show: "She/they! :) What about yours?" She is secure in her answer now 👍 a certified category five nonbinary woman moment.

5) Hunter Noceda

Season one: "My..... whats?" You try to explain what they are to him and he says "My uncle says gender is a sin and I should never fall into it lest my soul be lost. And I dont know what that means but I dont want him to be mad at me so. Bye" and then he would flee the scene at 300mph and have a panic attack about in the closet.

Season two: "Oh... uh.... he... him?? I think??" *remembers youre supposed to ask something back* "Why do you need to know that" he sounds increasingly desperate as he realizes the social script for this conversation is slipping from his grasp, much like his current sanity.

Season 3: "Oh, oh, uhm, he/him, I guess" He sounds VERY unsure about that. You eye the book in his shoulder bag, and he shuffles awkwardly.

Post-show: "They/he!" They say, still a little haltingly. You nod like you believe it.

Post-post-show: "They...he... it? I mean I like they and it the most but Uhm he is still fine its fine like Im still a human. Im still a human... man" okay Hunter, for sure.

Post-post-post-post-show: "she...they?????" Sure Hunter

Post-post-post-post-post-show: "she/IT???" she shoulds desperate. Okay hunter.

Post-post-post-post-post-postshow: "It/its, but she/her is fine as well. Uh, thanks for asking. Uh. You?" There we go. Glad you finally came to this realization. The Murderbot Diaries would have irreversible affects on its gender.

[theriverbeyond]

ianthe for the character meme :-)

favorite thing about them

the way she wields shame and humiliation like a weapon, how she very intentionally takes on positions that make people ignore her/pity her/humiliate her/etc and uses that to her advantage. whatever the fuck she is doing with gender. the way (IMO) her arm situation maps onto very specific disability narratives.

least favorite thing about them

can't think of one bc every single detestable thing she has done is very integral to why i like her as a character </3

favorite line

can't beat a classic!!!

brOTP

her and John. the way she changes her affect trying to be his Augustine and Mercymorn, the way she is manipulating him while also being manipulated by him, the way she attempts to wield power over him while definitely still being subject to his whims, the way she chooses him over Augustine at the bottom of the River. I could go on

OTP

UNREQUITED harrianthe‼️‼️‼️ that girl is head over heels In Love with Harrow and I love to see it. she fancies herself as someone who would take advantage of Harrow but when the mkment comes to act on that, cannot bear to see her truly vulnerable. Harrow makes her feel soft. Harrow makes her do stupid things. and Harrow doesn't want to give her the time of day!!!!

nOTP

all respect to the shippers but I don't find appeal in Cytherea/Ianthe. Ianthe is just enjoying it way too much and she also simply isn't butch enough for Cytherea's tastes. to ME

random headcanon

so we know that she was almost strangled in the womb by Corona's umbilical cord. my headcanon is she usually wakes up having unconsciously wound her sheets around her neck. Before she was separated from Corona, it was dubious if it was Ianthe doing it or Corona, in her sleep, but Ianthe does it herself after she becomes a Lyctor

unpopular opinion

she and kiriona did NOT fuck. she tried but was soundly rejected and VERY sulky about it

song i associate with them

greek tragedy by the wombats, shivers by ed sheeran, both harrianthe (ianthe POV) bangers #toME

favorite picture of them

is it cheating if i link fan art that I drew. anyway shoutout to the bone arm's fat pad. tho looking at that ab 2 years on i think I could do better. i should redraw...

also I really adore all the comics drawn by @/naomistares but in particular this one, which makes me feel things that are best left unmentioned!!

character ask game

[yingui]

mean lesbians. am i right

[dead-lesbians]

android glados yippeee

[necromycologist]

rip ianthe tridentarius... born to be the one and only fucked up failgirl forced to somehow end up as the voice of reason

[mattodore]

somehow managed to make matthias look even more bitchy

[tallfroggieart]

EXCELLENT FUCKING NEWS I’VE MADE NEW ART

All it took was at least 30 hours, some gender-bending but only in the most lesbian way possible, and blorbos from my shows. Easy-peasy!

Go check out @jopzer for more fem royjamie!! Their art is truly the blueprint.

(And also please please please fucking click for higher quality. Tumblr I hate you <3)

[h3artshapedkisses]

It’s the way you can tell most of the lesbian community are full of bi-hets just by how enraged they are by a lesbian saying she’s proud to have never kissed, dated or had sex with a man. Why are you offended by homosexuality? Shouldn’t you be happy for her? Hm..

Also I hate when the fauxbians who have never had sex with a man are like “I just never happened to have sex with a men because no man wanted me lolll I’m a gold star but ashamed to call myself one :((.” Like as very femme young woman who never has done anything even slightly romantic with a men but has had boys ask me to be their girlfriend and even male friends try to ask me for intimacy since a very young age, and has had to put her foot down and firmly say no ever single time, its so weird that they are deliberately erasing gold star’s life experiences to just being “ugly”. If you would have then you are a bisexual. Full stop.

[fyeahnix]

While the Enforcers who patrol Zaun are paid off and have been told to not bother the locals, the few of them who are brave enough venture into the Lanes to lounge around, sometimes while on duty. The most foolhardy of them will mosey into Babette's brothel for a session.

The workers hate them. But money is money.

Every blue moon some too-green Enforcer will try to press their luck on getting away with mistreating the workers or attempting (sometimes succeeding) to leave without paying. The workers will, of course, complain to Babette about it. The girls, especially, will complain to Sevika.

Most Enforcers know to never get complaints brought up to Sevika, lest they jeopardize the deal Silco has in place with the sheriff.

"So, you're the pig I've been hearing about."

The enforcer whipped his head around to catch Sevika's pointed glare. He was young, dark-haired, and attempting in vain to grow facial hair. Not too unattractive for anyone else seemingly under the age of 23. He reeked of alcohol and sweaty sex and Sevika scrunched her nose at that. The cigarette in his mouth clung on for dear life as he sputtered a response.

"Fuck did you say?"

He missed matching Sevika's height by two inches, but even with his chest puffed out, he severely lacked the muscle mass to back up the bass in his voice. A nonthreat. Probably a kid on his fourth patrol in the Undercity. Sevika had stumbled into enforcers like him before. All annoying little shitheels who thought they ran the place because of a shiny badge.

Sevika kept her composure and her arms—her weapons–hidden under her poncho. "I think you heard me loud and clear. Or did you forget where you were?"

He looked around at the glowing neon and smoke-filled air of Zaun's red-light district. Then sized Sevika up. A haughty smirk painted his chapped lips next.

"The backwoods, clearly. Don't know why anyone bothers coming here. Just a bunch of cheap whores and booze."

"And yet... You're a repeat customer."

The enforcer narrows his eyes. "Where'd you get that from?"

Sevika leaned in. "Got eyes and ears everywhere. Also heard you didn't bother paying for a service."

His lip twitched, only somewhat regaining his composure as he flicked his cigarette to the pavement. "Well. Service wasn't satisfactory."

Sevika chuckled. "That so?"

The enforcer reached for his weapon when she moved. "You touch me, and I'll have an entire squad on your ass. Back. Up."

The chuckle morphed into a full laugh. "I don't see any 'backup' around. Do you?"

Sure enough, he scanned his surroundings. No one around except the supposed "cheap whores" and peddlers at the end of the block, curious but keeping their noses out of their business.

"Your superiors must be hazin' you. What were they thinking, sending a little man like you around to do their patrolling for them?" He steeled his jaw as Sevika continued. "Let me tell you something.

"Ever seen a wolf? They're apex predators. Strong alone, sure, but even more deadly in a pack. There's power in numbers and that pack allows them to take down prey many times their own size. But what happens when a lone wolf encounters a farmer and his flock of sheep?

"It gets bold, brazen. Stupid. The sheep disappear one by one. And the wolf keeps showing up. That is... until the farmer gets a deterrent, a guard dog. But that wolf? It wants those sheep, because they should be easy prey, right? So, it brings more wolves, hoping the size of the pack will scare the dog away."

Sevika leaned in again.

"But no matter how many fuckin' wolves show up, that dog isn't backing down."

The enforcer's grip on his weapon intensified so much, his veins popped. He swallowed.

"If I see you down here again, I'll make sure you never make it back topside for your 'pack.' Now. Get the fuck outta here."

The junior enforcer gritted his teeth before he snarled and stomped away.

taglist: @gaudesstuff @archangeldyke-all @abitohoney @lesbeaniegreenie @sexysapphicshopowner

[butchladymaria]

[assblastergaster]

I am finally starting to see the light on just how robust all of the companion origin romances are (i.e. romances within the party outside of tav). While larian obvs had to work with sudden, abrupt story changes and losses, somehow they still managed to make all of their stories so intertwined that all possible romances are good.

Take Karlach for example:

• Wyll: Their stories are literal parallels; They both were following someone with power and influence, yearning to serve them and others to the best of their abilities—and were both discarded after being tricked into (literal) hell. together they provide for each other what was taken without denying themselves what has changed them (more devilish? so be it, i am stronger for it). She will guard what he loves without question—all he's ever tried to do—and he will stand against the forces that served to get them here, all she's ever wanted. They have both been forever changed to be more devilish (scarred, marked, horned, dehorned) but still yearn to thrive amongst their peers to no avail. He will always be a human with fangs and horns, and she will always be a tiefling with no horn(s), no heart. They are each other's only peers, the hunter and the prey.

• Shadowheart: One young girl is torn from the people she loves, her home, the authority figure she serves. She is marred by this person. Her parents are lost to her—she will never get to say goodbye, never get to hug them again. Her peers shun her, believe her dead or worse. Her only friends are lost to her (or so she thinks). She is a half-elf forcibly blinded to the ways of the world, sent on a suicide mission to secure her master's authority. She is a tiefling who has forgotten the joys of the world, escaping a suicide mission meant to secure her master's authority. They were both taught to selfishly strike out against the world to just survive. Together they find something alien to both of them—self prioritization without selfishness (I am not made to serve, i was made to be here. with you).

• Astarion: He is empty of life, cold and buried; She is being consumed by her life, toiling and burned. They were both, for lack of better words, Baldurian hot-shots in their youths. A learned magistrate and the head guard of an up-and-coming Baneite. They were both likely very corrupt. Astarion is obvious—his attack by the Gur was prob in response to prejudiced rulings. But Karlach was working for fucking Gortash. She's not an idiot, and while she certainly has a soft spot for the community, she had to have had a hand in his nefarious doings. Regardless, both of them are still furious about what happened to them, rightfully so—and neither is willing to accept (yet) that the version of them they left behind was not what they want now. They both want revenge, to kill the fucks that stole them away. And they both get it, only to find that they need to make a life after this, not to mourn the life before this.

• Lae'zel: This, like all Lae'zel romances, is a tale of two cities. Lae'zel wants to serve someone so badly, else she cannot prove to others (and herself) that she is worth the air she is breathing. Her culture demands it, history commands it, and she was born for it. But she can't do it. Not blindly. Karlach was a rough and tumble child on the streets of Baldur's Gate looking to eke out her livelihood without serving authority. But she couldn't avoid it, nothing she's good at could make money or earn respect except for serving as a guard, as a soldier. At first meeting, they both immediately respect and pity each other. Karlach likes seeing someone so proud of who they choose to serve, but innately understands that it is not a choice. Lae'zel likes seeing someone strong enough to command respect, but knows that she "should" want to serve someone too. They see themselves in the other. Neither understands, but they will. Karlach will see why Lae'zel is so desperate to belong, to serve—Lae'zel will see why she is too scared to submit.

• Gale: We both have a bomb in our chests. A divine being, omnipotent in all but name, placed it within you and quelled its fire so long as you obey and worship. The most obscene devil, queen of the Hells, ripped me from my home and gave me this, its flame fanned by servitude and snuffed by disobedience. Gale has lost himself to depression, Karlach to rage. He pours through books searching for the answer he will never find, but that's how he got here in the first place. Karlach smashes her way through everything, making ragtag enemies and allies along the way, but that's how she got here. Before anyone says some bullshit about Karlach being too "dumb" or Gale being too "pretentious;" Karlach is not dumb, she is naïve (which lends itself to dumb decisions) but wise. She's led an experience-rich life (encountered through misplaced trust and naivety) and has learned lessons from every single one, something she learns to temper within Gale as well. Gale has done many things but actually learned from very few of them, which is one of the reasons why he's immediately eager for the Crown. But he's also not an idiot, he's just vulnerable. Together, they balance each other emotionally and pedagogically.

Obviously this is focusing on the narrative aspects of these relationships—not the personal intricacies. But the majesty of this writing is that these are all characters written by separate people, forging separate stories with thousands of paths each. It's just unheard of.

[femme-bat]

I'm not arguing with anyone. If you think eVeRyOnE sHoUlD gIvE aNd ReCeIvE and stone people are not valid, kill yourself.

[wlw-cryptid]

Opinion on chubby butches/butches with stretch marks?

sweetheart. if my header werent what it is, it'd be "dad bod butches please call me"

[starry-eyed-butch]

I meant to put this with the one earlier but I liked it too.

[imperial-agent]

i got a $200 coupon from my mother for xmas to get either my nails done, my brows tinted, lashes extended or my lips temporarly filled and this is the most direct homophobia i have ever experienced