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#love it when i learn about myself as an author from the ask game
primewritessmut · 8 months
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💞 😬🎉🤯
💞 Who's your comfort character?
I mean, recently? Probably Mobius M. Mobius. He’s such an interesting character and I like turning him around in my brain like a Rubik’s Cube. Twisting one side to see if/how that changes the other sides. But historically, it’s been Venom. Eddie and the symbiote brought me a lot of comfort when I’ve needed it at different points in my life and I imagine they will continue to do so.
😬 Which of your fics would you be most horrified for friends, family, or coworkers to stumble upon?
Oh my god. All of them? There really is something behind the mortifying ordeal of being seen. There are a few people in my life that know I write fanfic but they (almost) never ask to read it and I never offer. Of the two that have asked to read something, we’ve literally never spoken of it again.
I tend to tell people the truth when they ask me what I’m writing about (“the vulnerability of trust and knife kink” or “a guy getting sounded by the alien that lives in his body”) and it’s a really easy way to gauge whether people are going to be cool or not. They usually do some combination of freeze/grimace/wide eyes and then, again, we NEVER SPEAK OF IT.
But, to honestly answer your question, I would probably be most horrified if someone stumbled across she’s not going to die today. That probably marks the true beginnings of my downward spiral.
🎉 What leads you to consider a fic a success?
Usually that I finish it. That’s the main reason I started writing fanfic in the first place: to fucking finish something. Up to the point of Need a Helping Hand? I’d literally never finished a story, just let them float free form through my brain or exist on lost post-it notes or in half-empty notebooks.
After a while, I also started making mini-goals related to most of what I was writing and that, too, becomes a mark of success in its way. Do I feel like I improved at writing banter? Did I effectively use first person pov? Was there finally not a happy ending for once?
And then, you know, the serotonin and dopamine factor. As in does it provide me enough?
🤯 What's a genre you struggle with as a writer (ex. romance, action, etc.)?
Fantasy. Historical. Mysteries and Thrillers. Honestly anything that requires me to do a ton of research or think too deeply about the world of the story.
Like I said somewhere else, I mostly write linearly, straight out the gate, from beginning to end with no planning. If a story requires a lot of planning (which I think all the above genres do) then I’m going to get gummed up in the works and never write anything.
Huh. Maybe that’s why I never finished anything before NAHH? I was always trying to write fucking fantasy.
x
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harringtonstilinski · 6 months
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Pour Some Sugar On Me - Eddie Munson (Smut)
Author: @harringtonstilinski​ Characters: Eddie Munson x Henderson!Reader Word Count: 7,233 Warnings: fluff, squint super hard for angst, mentions of weed, using the hellfire club scene again bite me, trying to do more dirty talk so pls be gentle even though it's not much, Requested: no | yes; Smut (Minors DNI): no | yes, 18+; protected p in v, talks of masturbation, public, A/N: Hi, friends! The Upside Down doesn't exist in this. Also, the Party's in 8th grade, so no Hellfire members are mentioned except for Eddie. If you like this chapter, please do not hesitate to reblog and give some feedback, whether it be in the reblogs, comments, or my inbox. As always, read at your own risk and enjoy 😊
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“Please?”
“No.”
“Please?
“No.”
“Sweetheart, please!”
Sighing, you stopped walking to turn and face your best friend, your books clutched to your chest. “Why?”
“Because we need you!”
“I don’t know anything about D&D! Why would you make me torture myself with trying to learn how to play while you and the rest of Hellfire have been playing for literal years?”
Eddie went to open his mouth, but stopped short when he realized… you were right. He raised his brows with a frown on his face, an unimpressed look on his face as he agreed with you. “You’re right. That’s fair.” When he looked back at your figure, he noticed… you weren’t standing there at all, having walked away.
Following you, he exclaimed, “Sweets!” Resting his hand gently on your arm as he caught up with you, he took a breath and said, “Come on! At least just sit in your chair. You can read or do homework or watch us play. You love doing one of those.”
It was true. You did love doing one of those three things while they played. If you read or did your homework, you’d pause and watch them for a moment, and sometimes while you actually watched them, you’d lean your head on Eddie’s shoulder when he wasn’t being all dramatic to just rest your eyes for a moment.
He would never admit it, but that was Eddie’s favorite moment; your head leaned against his shoulder with your eyes closed, your breathing even as you’d fall asleep while he and the rest of Hellfire would play. As he looked at you, he was silently hoping that you’d do it again at this meeting.
As you sighed, you went to answer him, but your name being called had you looking towards the source, another sigh falling from your lips. “What, Steve?”
Jogging up to you, Steve smiled and asked, “Hey, you gonna come to the game tonight?”
When you looked back at Eddie, you saw how uncomfortable he was, and it was then and there that you made your decision. Looking back at Steve, you answered, “I can’t. I’m going to Hellfire tonight. I kinda owe Eddie.”
Said boy looked at you, shock in his eyes as you stayed looking at Steve, the latter nodding his head and smiling softly.
“Yeah, okay,” Steve said.
Resting your hand on his arm, you frowned, replying, “I’m sorry. I’ll come to the next game. Promise.”
He sighed, bringing you into a hug. “Okay, bug.” Kissing the top of your head, he sighed. Looking into your eyes, he reminded you to be good and not do anything he wouldn’t do, which in turn made you laugh.
When you turned to look at Eddie, he still had that same look on his face that he had while you were talking to Steve. “What?” you chuckled.
“You’re gonna come tonight?” he asked.
Starting your walk to your locker, Eddie followed as you replied, “Well, you wouldn’t stop bugging me about it, so…”
Eddie softly laughed behind you, taking quick strides to your side, putting his arm around your shoulders. “You know you love it.”
You couldn’t deny, you released a breath with a smile on your face as you answered, “Yeah. I do.”
~~~
“It’s forced conformity,” Eddie said, walking back across the table.
“Oh, my god, Eddie, get down,” you whispered, head hidden in your book.
He listened, but not like how you wanted. Instead, he jumped down and yelled, “That’s what’s killing the kids!”
Feeling totally embarrassed, you went back to reading and blocked out most of the events that happened after that, coming back to reality as he said, “And all you gotta do is get your Bo-Peep’s on and go and find one.”
When he took his seat back at the head of the table, you looked at him with furrowed brows, asking, “Get their Bo-Peep’s on?”
“Ya’know. Like Bo-Peep and her sheep?”
You looked at him for a moment before looking back at your book while saying, “You’re so stupid.”
All Eddie could do was chuckle, reaching into his lunchbox to retrieve a pretzel, a smile present on his face. As he chewed his food, his smile fell as a thought raced his mind. “Hey, sweetheart?”
“Hm?” you hummed, eyes still on the page, but your attention fully on Eddie.
“I have this, uhm… thing after school… in the woods.”
Well, that grabbed your attention. “What? I thought we were hanging out before Hellfire like we always do?”
“And we will,” Eddie said, reaching to lightly touch your forearm, his brows raised. “I just, uhm… have to meet someone… in the woods.” He didn’t want to admit to himself, but he loved touching you, within reason; your arm, your knee, your shoulder, grabbing your hand and kissing your knuckles like the romance movies. Honestly, he felt like he couldn’t get enough.
You looked at him as he quickly eyed his lunchbox before looking back at you, never having moved his hand. Sighing, you closed your eyes, focusing on Eddie’s hand resting on your arm to ground you. Hating to admit it to yourself, you loved feeling his touch on you. You often thought about it when you were up late at night, unable to sleep, thinking about what it would feel like for him to touch you while you pleasured yourself.
Eddie’s hand lightly squeezed where it rested on your forearm. “I know you don’t like it–”
“Eddie, I don’t just not like it,” you whispered. “I hate it.” Looking down, you couldn't help but feel emotional at the mention of his ‘side job’. When he had admitted to you one night that he had started selling weed, you got into a heated argument about it, your best friend telling you that he was doing it to help his Uncle Wayne.
You had understood his reasoning, but were more afraid of him getting caught selling it, or smoking it, or just having possession of it. He had assured you that he would get caught, and that he’d be safe with it. So far, so good.
“I know, sweetheart, I know.” Moving his hand to yours that was gripping your book, removing your hand to hold your fingers, almost like he was getting ready to kiss your knuckles like he did from time to time. Instead, he just held them, looking into your eyes. “I promise you, I’ll be done quickly. Just wait for me at the van, okay?”
Sighing, you nodded, closing your eyes. When you opened them back up, you looked Eddie straight in the eye and smirked before asking, “Can I sit in the back? With the doors open?” You knew he didn’t care and would say yes. Hell, he’d let you sit on the goddamn roof if you wanted to.
Softly laughing, he lowered his head before bringing your hand towards his face, his lips ghosting over your fingers as he lifted his head and whispered, “Anything for you, m’lady,” before kissing your fingers, a giggle erupting from you.
The entire time the two of you had your moment, the rest of Hellfire looked on with annoyed looks on their faces, each of them wondering if the two of you were ever getting together.
~~~
When the bell rang after lunch and in between classes, you carried on with your day like normal, only your anxiety started to spike at the thought of Eddie in the woods with his damn lunchbox during last period, and just like he did every day, Eddie was waiting for you by the front doors of the school.
As he watched you approach him, he held his arm out for you to take, muttering a “M’lady,” with a smile on his face, making you laugh like he did every day. He walked you to his van, opening the back doors for you before helping you hop inside. Deciding to make a bold move, he placed himself between your legs, his hands on either side of your outer thighs. “I’ll be right back, okay?” Shaking his head at you, he added quietly, “Don’t go anywhere.”
Your breath hitched as he stood before you before you nodded your head, saying just as quietly, “I won’t.” Holding up your book, you added, “I’ll just be sitting here reading.” When he leaned forward, you closed your eyes, feeling his lips on your forehead in a chaste kiss. Well, that was new.
He walked away, lunchbox in tow as he made his way towards the back of the school to the picnic table in the woods, where he met none other than Chrissy Cunningham. The entire time he was in the woods with her, he couldn’t stop thinking about you, constantly looking off in the direction of the school, a worried look on his face that didn’t go unnoticed by Chrissy.
“Hey, are you okay?” she asked.
Quickly looking back at her, he raised his brows before furrowing them while nodding, answering, “Yeah, yeah. I’m fine. So, uhh… we gonna do this or what?” before his mind went back to you.
When you watched Eddie walk away, your facial expression went from one of nervousness to somewhat sadness. You were sad that he walked away from you to make a drug deal, moreso because he walked away. You wanted that moment with him to last, but as the universe would have it, you didn’t get what you wanted.
So, you turned your back to the wall of the van and leaned against it, bringing your knees up as you rested your book on your thighs, already lost in the words on the pages, the world of the book sucking you in.
As your eyes scanned the words of the scene you were reading, your mind couldn’t help but picture you and Eddie doing whatever the characters were doing, your bottom lip between your teeth.
You hadn’t even noticed two figures walking up to the back of the van and leaning against the bumper.
“Can you please remove your lip from your teeth?”
Well, that had your attention as you jumped about 10 feet out of your skin. Holding your chest with one hand and your book with the other, you looked at your little brother and just glared. “What the fuck, Dustin Wade?”
Chucklin, Steve asked, “Your middle name is Wade?”
It was Dustin’s turn to use that Henderson glare on his older male friend, responding, “Yes, it is. And what’s yours? Clarence.”
“Worse,” he answered.
“It’s Anthony,” you said, hiding behind your book.
Steve looked at you, mouth opened. “How dare you?” He said your middle name with such sarcasm, your face went from playful to annoyed.
“Go the fuck away.”
They both laughed, which in turn made you chuckle before you asked, “Okay, but seriously, what do you guys want?”
“We came over to ask you if it was okay if I went to watch Steve play,” Dustin said. “He said–”
“I can take him home right after,” Steve agreed.
With a confused look, you asked, “Don’t have to shower and celebrate with the team after?”
“He can take me after he showers or just changes,” Dustin suggested. He looked at Steve and added, “He can even shower at our house and stay the night.”
“Yeah, yeah! I can do that!” Steve said.
Narrowing your eyes at Steve, you said, “You better make sure he gets home, Harrington, or else I will spill your hair care routine to everyone in this godforsaken school, and maybe even the whole town.”
“Yup, I’ll leave right after the game.”
“Good.” Looking at Dustin, you said, “Please be good, no funny business, and tell mom to not wait up.”
“Where are you going?” Dustin asked.
Sighing, you crossed your legs, resting your hands in the middle, one of your fingers still in the pages of your book. “I’m going to Hellfire with Eddie tonight. He’s been working on this campaign forever and he wants me to be there.”
Both boys looked at each other, different expressions on each of their faces before Dustin turned to face you once more, saying, “Fair enough. You be good. Don’t make dumb choices.”
Chuckling, you uncrossed your legs, bringing your knees back up, saying, “Yeah, okay. Love you.”
“Love you, too,” they both replied, a genuine laugh spilling from your lips as your eyes went back to the pages. You weren’t sure how long you’d been reading for. The only thing you were sure of was the sun; it was high in the sky when you saw your brother and best friend, but had started to set when you thought Eddie wouldn’t return. 
So, you crawled more into the back, finding the pillows and blankets he’d left in there. You crawled back to the spot you were just previously occupying, placing the pillow where your butt had sat, laying horizontally with the blanket draped over your body, your eyes falling shut. 
As you drifted off to sleep, you couldn’t help but think about Eddie, a quiet “goddammit,” falling from your lips as you realized… you liked your best friend.
~~~
His meeting with Chrissy took a little longer than he expected. It basically turned into an instruction session before turning into a therapy session. As he walked back to the parking lot, he sighed, running a hand through his hair.
Chrissy helped Eddie open his eyes at his feelings for you. Even though he didn’t want to admit his feelings, he knew he would eventually have to. So, as he continued walking to his van, he ran a hand down his face, muttering a quiet, “goddammit,” to himself before rounding the back of the van, stopping dead in his tracks as he spotted your sleeping form.
He couldn’t help but watch as your shoulders and chest rose and fell with each breath you took. Sitting on the edge of the van, he reached out, lightly brushing a strand of hair away from your face causing you to stir.
When you opened your eyes, you looked at him and smiled a sleep smile in his direction before essentially… falling back asleep.
Eddie chuckled, resting his hand on your cheek, his thumb lightly rubbing along your cheekbone. “Sweetheart,” he whispered, a quiet hum being your answer to him. As he smirked, he said, “It’s almost time for Hellfire, baby. You still gonna sit and watch?”
Slowly opening your eyes, you breathed in a breath, tilting your head into Eddie’s hand that was still resting on your cheek. “Yeah,” you whispered. Sitting up, you let the blanket fall from your shoulder and bunch up at your waist. With furrowed brows, you looked at your best friend and asked, “What took so long?”
Sighing, Eddie moved to climb in the back of the van with you to retrieve his Hellfire bag. “Chrissy turned the sale into a therapy session after I explained everything to her about… well, ya’know.”
You nodded your head at the same time Eddie turned back around to face you.
“Anyway. I’d probably still be out there if she hadn't noticed what time it was, seeing as she has to be at the game and all.”
“Right,” you whispered, looking down at your book. Picking it up, you muttered, “I thought I put you up,” before you grabbed your backpack to put the book back in. You pulled the blanket off of you and went to fold it when Eddie’s hand stopped you, a shiver running down your spine at the touch.
“Don’t fold it yet,” he whispered.
“Why?”
“Because.” He wanted to say what was on his mind, but stopped himself, instead saying, “I know you get cold in the drama room. You can bring it to warm yourself up.”
A smile spread across your face as you tilted your head down, not wanting him to see the blush creeping on your cheeks. “Okay.”
After he jumped from the back of the van, he held his hand out to you, a smile on his face as he said, “M’lady?”
Chuckling, you slid off the back to your feet, hand still in his as you looked at him, saying, “You’re so stupid.”
~~~
Once the boys had everything set up and were sitting in their spots, Eddie took his place at the head of the table on, what he liked to call, his throne. You sat next to Eddie, sighing while draping the blanket over your legs, bringing them up to bend at the knee and tilting them to the side, letting your knee rest against the arm rest.
Just as you opened your book to pick up where you left off, Eddie said something about hooded cultists chanting something about lord Vecna.
“They turn to you, remove their hoods,” Eddie said, your eyes lifting to look at him from the corner of your eye. “You recognize most of them from Makbar. But there is one you do not recognize, his skin shriveled–”
As Eddie spoke and started to stand, you lowered your book, his voice sucking you in like a damn vice. He looked at you as he whispered, “Desiccated,” making you jump a little.
“And something else,” he said, softly, turning to the rest of the group. “He is not only missing his left arm, but his left eye!” After putting his left arm behind his back, he reached over his head with his right arm, covering his left eye.
The boys all protested while your brows scrunched in confusion as they started shouting their opinions from the last campaign.
“Vecna’s dead!”
“He was killed by Kas!”
Eddie looked at you with a smirk as he sat down before going back into his Dungeon Master character, as he liked to call it. “So it was thought, my friends, so it was thought.” Grabbing the Vecna playing piece, he stood and said, “But Vecna lives!” before playing the piece on the board.
“What the fuck?” you whispered.
“You are scared, you’re tired, you are injured,” Eddie said. “Do you flee Vecna and his cultists? Or do you stand your ground and fight?” He looked at you, leaning his hands on the table and asked, “What say you, princess? Do you think they’ll flee… or fight?”
You thought for a moment before shrugging, “If they’re not a bunch of pussies, that’d fight.”
His eyes slightly widened, his cock twitching at the dirty words that came from your mouth… or what he considered to be dirty. Looking back at his friends, he said, “Come on.”
After a few moments, one of them said, “I say we fight. Do the death,” everyone else around the table giving their agreements.
You watched as Eddie chuckled, a warmth in your belly starting to form. Deciding not to wait another day, you started to quickly form a plan in your head as to how you’d show Eddie exactly how you feel.
Eddie sat back down, happy with the turn of events. He knew that if you have your opinion, the rest of the group would agree to it. On the nights you weren’t there, they would lose the campaign and go home thinking of ways they could’ve won, as opposed to the nights you were there, they’d win, going with the opinion you gave.
When he needed inspiration for his campaign, Eddie would come to your house or call you to have you come to his trailer, just to sit and enjoy your company. You’d fall asleep half the time, but that didn’t matter to him. Your company was all he needed.
As you sat next to Eddie, half watching and half reading, you couldn’t help but think about the last few nights with him, sitting with him in his room while he wrote the campaign they’re all playing. The way he would pace in front of his bed, stopping at his Sweetheart to strum her strings before going back to the task at hand.
You couldn’t help but wonder what it would feel like to have his hands hold you, touch you, feel you the way he did his guitar. You also couldn’t but wonder what his fingers would feel like, caressing your skin, tucking your hair behind your ear, lacing his fingers between yours. The third thing you couldn’t but wonder about… was his mouth, and what it could do to you.
When one of the members called for a time-out, you were brought out of your thoughts, not realizing that you were just staring at nothing on the page in front of you. A hand on your knee caused you to jump, looking down at the ringed finger on your best friend’s hand.
Looking up at him, you noticed the crease between his eyebrows as he asked, “You okay?”
Nodding, you took in a breath. “I guess I got lost in thought.”
“About what?” His hand was still there, on your knee.
You took a breath to reply, but stopped yourself from doing so as you furrowed your own brows, looking at the huddle at the other end of the table as you heard, “Vecna just decimated us. We can’t kill him with two players.”
Sighing heavily, you looked back at your book, your index finger between the pages to turn when you were ready. You could feel the eyes of the members on you as you read the words you’d read a million times that night before saying in a sing-song manner, “I wouldn’t be a bunch of pussies, if I were you.”
“Pussies? Really? ‘Cause we’re not delusional?”
“Delusional? How about… not cowards?” you shrugged.
Eddie’s voice yelling out, “Hey!” had your head quickly turning towards him, noticing he wasn’t sitting in his chair, but sitting on the armrest furthest from you. “If I may interject, gentlemen–” He looked at you with a smirk. “Princess.” Looking back at the boys, he continued as he switched armrests, “Whilst I respect the passion, you’d be wise to take Gregory the Great’s concern to heart. There is no shame in running. Don’t try to be heroes. Not today, ‘kay?”
They all turned back around as you looked back down at your book, chuckling to yourself.
“What’s so funny?” Eddie asked, bumping his ribcage with your shoulder.
“Nothing,” you said, a smile on your face. “It’s just–” You yawned, closing your book. “-nice to see you in your element.” Putting your book up, you felt like you couldn’t keep your eyes open. When you leaned back against the back of the seat, you brought your knees back up, having placed your feet on the ground when reaching for your bag.
Leaning your head against the back of the chair, you felt the blanket being draped over your form, your eyes falling shut, but you weren’t yet asleep when the boys came back to the table, standing at the end. You did, however, fall right asleep before they started to roll the 20 sided die, which was only a couple of minutes later.
Eddie’s sole focus was on that 20 sided die, he hadn’t noticed you fell asleep, head slouched over more to the point where your hairline was almost touching his throne. When the die said 20, the club cheered loudly, Eddie saying, “What? What?” before clapping and looking at your sleeping form.
“That’s why we play, princess,” he whispered. “That’s why we play.”
~~~
You woke up to the unmistakable sound of Eddie putting on his jacket, opening your eyes to catch him pulling his hair from under the leather before you sat up and started stretching, a yawn escaping you.
Eddie turned at the sound of your yawn, sitting back down in his throne, resting a hand on your arm. “Hey, sweetheart,” he said, a soft smile on his face. “How’d you sleep?”
Shrugging, you softly replied, “As good as you can in this chair,” before softly chuckling. “Did they win?”
He nodded, bringing his hand up to your face, brushing some hair from your face. “Crit hit.”
As you scrunched your brows, you tried to think of what the crit hit meant… and then it came to you. “Crit hit equals good thing.”
Proud that you remembered something he taught you, Eddie smiled a little bigger, nodding his head. “That’s right, princess.”
With your eyes locked on his, and his on yours, you brought your foreheads together, closing your eyes while sighing. “Eddie,” you whispered. “There’s something I need to tell you, and I don’t think I can wait much longer.”
He nodded against your forehead, his eyes having been closed. This was it, he thought to himself. She’s going to reject me. “I know, and it’s okay.”
Confused, you lifted your head while opening your eyes, looking at his crestfallen expression. “What’s okay?”
Eddie dropped his hand, letting out a heavy sigh while standing. He walked to the side of the table, bringing his hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose while the other went to his hip, his back somewhat towards you. “The rejection,” he whispered. Trying to compose himself, he turned towards you a little, resting his hands on the table, much like he did earlier in the night. Hanging his head, he said, “Just get it over with.”
You had stood when the word rejection came from his lips. “Rejection? You think I’m rejecting you? Eddie, that was the furthest thing from my mind.” Bringing your hand up to cup his cheek furthest from you, you turned his head to face you, his eyes not following. “Eddie, look at me,” you whispered.
Sighing, he turned his eyes toward you, those chocolate brown eyes you loved so much staring back at you as your thumb moved across his cheek, gently stroking.
“What I was gonna say–,” you said, so softly. “-was that I really like you. Hell, I may even love you-”
“As a friend,” he gritted through his teeth.
“As more,” you said sternly. “Eddie, listen. I’ve had a crush on you forever. Don’t ask me when it started because I don’t even fucking remember. You’ve introduced me to so much; metal, D&D, a world outside of popularity and basketball.”
It was true. You were considered popular just by knowing Steve Harrington, who was still your best friend in the entire world. Eddie was an added bonus. Though your popularity status went downhill after everyone found out you were hanging out with Eddie The Freak Munson, that didn’t stop you from hanging out with him or Steve, the latter still calling you his best friend. You didn’t care about your popularity status. All you cared about… was being around people that made you happy, and those people… were Eddie and Steve, respectfully. Your main focus right now being Eddie and his happiness. 
“I love you for that,” you whispered.
With wide eyes, Eddie looked at you. “You love me, then?” Looking at a spot on his denim vest, you thought it over for just a moment before smiling and looking back into those chocolate eyes, whispering, “Yeah. I do.”
“Thank God,” he whispered, pressing his lips to yours as he stood straighter.
It took you no time to kiss him back, your free hand coming up to cup his other cheek, your lips moving in sync as Eddie’s hands came to rest on your waist. His tongue traced your bottom lip, asking for entrance to your mouth, which you gladly accepted.
As if a magnet were in between the two of you, the both of you pulled each other closer, your hands going into his hair as his hands went to your back, gently rubbing wherever he could.
You pulled back first, needing some much needed air as you rested your forehead against his. “I’ve thought about this for a really long time, Eds.”
“Me, too, baby.”
Sparking up an idea, you rested your hand on his chest, looking into his eyes. “Don’t move,” you said, enthusiastically frisky.
When you walked toward the door, Eddie’s eyes followed your form, a mischievous grin on his face.  “What are you doing, princess?”
“Oh, you know–” Click. “Just… locking the door.” You turned back to face him, back against the door for a moment, bottom lip trapped between your teeth with a smile as you looked at him.
Eddie knew he was in trouble just with that smile on your face. He felt his cock twitch his pants, the black denim growing uncomfortably tight as he looked at you. “And, why, pray tell, are you… locking the door?”
“So that I can do this,” you said, making your way over to him.
As a confused look crossed his features as you walked up to him, he shook his head, his hair swaying with the motion as he went to ask, “Wha–” before your lips pressed to his. He was shocked, to say the least, but finally happy to have your lips on his.
Snaking your hands into his hair, you sighed happily as your lips moved in sync with Eddie’s, his tongue sneaking out to ask for entrance to your mouth, which you gladly accepted. The moment your tongues touched, a soft moan escaped you, Eddie’s dick growing even harder than what he thought was capable.
“Damn, princess,” he muttered, kissing the corner of your mouth and cheek until he got to your neck. “You know how long I’ve been waiting for that?”
“Mmmmm,” you hummed, hand lightly resting on the back of his head as his lips searched for that sweet spot. Once he found it, you gasped, whispering, “Eddie! Right there.”
He went to work on your sweet spot, leaving a bruise there, licking at it to soothe it before kissing his way down to your collarbone, reaching with his hands to grab the hem of your shirt, lifting his head to look into your eyes, asking, “Can I take it off? If I’m gonna do anything else–”
“Yes,” you breathed. “Take it off. Take it all off.”
Eddie chuckled and shook his head, lifting your shirt up and over your head, revealing… a plain black bra. “Damn, sweets.”
“It’s not special or anything–”
“Still hot.”
“Because it’s black?” you smirked.
He chuckled again, dipping his head to kiss at the tops of your breasts, snaking his hand behind your back to unclasp your bra, the straps falling from your shoulders. Once the material had slid down your arms, he looked at you, mouth watering. “Damn, babe,” he whispered.
Deciding to be a little daring, you lightly shimmied your chest, a small smile on your face as you did. “Like what you see, Eds?”
“Oh, I very much like what I see,” he said, bringing his hand to the spot between your shoulder blades to pull you towards him, his lips descending to your nipple, wrapping around the bud.
As he licked and sucked, your hand found its purchase to the back of Eddie’s head again, leaving him there as moans and whimpers spilled from your lips. “Oh, my god.”
Breathing out a soft laugh as he switched to your other breast, he whispered, “I knew you’d like that.”
“Oh, you did, did you?” you asked, softly. Another moan made its way out of your throat at the feeling of his lips and fingers going to work on both of your nipples. “Mmmmm,” you hummed.
Eddie pulled back, palming your breast as he looked at you as he said, “Sure did, sweet thing. I’ve dreamt about this for a while.”
You rested your hands on his shoulders, looking him deep in his eyes before bringing a hand up to gently and softly cup his cheek, whispering, “So have I.”
He dove right in, pressing his lips to yours in a searing kiss, a full on make out session as you moved your hands to his shoulders, sliding his leather jacket and denim vest off his shoulders, his Hellfire shirt on full display. 
The only time the two of you broke apart was for you to remove his shirt, his chest tattoos on full display. You looked at them, tracing over them, even though it almost caused fear in you to trace the spider tattoo.
“Don’t worry,” he whispered, putting his hand over yours. “It’s just a tattoo.”
When you looked at him, he was softly smiling, which caused you to softly smile. “I know. They just creep me out.”
“I know what arachnophobia is, babe.” He smiled bigger before a small chuckle came from him causing you to roll your eyes.
Giggling, you leaned forward, resting your head on his shoulder. “ I know that, dork.” You slid your hands down his torso, making him breathe in a hiss before your fingers wrapped the top of his black jeans.
Eddie moved his hands to yours, bringing your hands to his belt. He never broke eye contact as he did. “Unbuckle it.”
You did as he asked, looking down to his belt, carefully undoing it and his button before sliding his zipper down.
He breathed out a deep breath, the pressure on his cock releasing a little.
Feeling brave, you decided to reach into his pants, wrapping his hardened length in your hand. “Fuck. I can barely touch my fingertips.” You chuckled, looking up at him, a look of disappointment crossing his features. “Don’t worry, babe. That’s a good thing. Means you’re big.” Biting your bottom lip between your teeth, you tried to be seductive, which worked because Eddie sucked in a breath. “I feel like you’re being submissive.”
“Nah,” he said. “Just letting you take the reins for a moment, swee– fuck.”
Your hand moving up and down had a moan escaping Eddie’s throat, his head being thrown back.
“Fuuuuuck, sweetheart. That feels amazing.”
Leaning forward, you placed your lips to his Adam’s apple, moving down his sternum and stopping where you couldn’t reach anymore before looking back up at his face, an almost fucked out look crossing his features. “You look so pretty,” you whispered.
“I’ll show you pretty,” he said, squatting to pick you up, your legs wrapping around his waist. “Get ready, princess. I’m gonna rock your fucking world.”
“Wha–” you asked, before gasping as your back met the table they had just played on, Eddie’s fingers grazing your sides before traveling down to the tops of your jeans. “Jesus, Eddie.”
“What do you want, princess?” he asked, skimming his lips across your stomach down to your jeans. Looking up at you with mischievous eyes through his lashes, he smiled a little, hearing and seeing your soft breaths quicken. “Tell me what you want. Tell me where you want me.”
“Mmm, on me,” you whispered.
As he unbuttoned your jeans, he whispered, “Where?” before kissing the imprint that the button left on your skin. 
Letting out a breath, you looked down at him and whispered his name, your eyes full of pleading, as well as trying to tell him something. When it finally hit him after a couple of seconds looking at you, his eyes went a little wide as he picked his head back up.
“Are you a vir–”
“No,” you shook your head, swallowing your nerves. “I’ve had sex before. I’ve just never… dirty talked before. The last guy didn’t, either. Well, with me, at least.”
Eddie nodded softly before looking back down at your skin, placing another soft to it. “Well, you don’t have to worry about that, baby.” Another kiss as he unzipped your jeans. “I’ll take care of all that.”
When he tapped your outer thighs, you knew that was your queue to lift your hips, your nerves starting to show as you watched him remove your jeans, sliding them down your ankles… after sliding your shoes off, of course.
It was like he knew you wanted to close your knees, so before you could even think of doing it, he quickly placed his hands on the inner part of your knees, feeling your muscles tense. “Please don’t be shy, baby.”
He spread your legs a little further apart to slide his hands on the back part of your thighs, bringing them back around to your inner, essentially holding your thighs as he slowly dropped to his knees, bringing you further down the table.
“Tell me,” Eddie said, kissing the inner part of your knee. “Did those other guys worship you?” He watched as you shook your head, another kiss placed a little further down your thigh. “Well, shame on them, then. Because I’m gonna worship this pussy–” Kiss. “-like my life–” Kiss a little further down. “-depends on it.”
You went to say something, the words dying in your throat as a soft moan escaped your throat at the feeling of Eddie’s tongue licking a stripe up your core.
“Damn, sweetheart,” he whispered, licking another stripe, this time in between your lips. “You taste incredible.”
“Mmm, Eddie,” you whispered, bringing a hand to the top of his head, gently carding your fingers through the tendrils at the top of his head. “Right there.”
Eddie hummed, lapping at your core like a man starved. As he brought his lips to your clit, licking and sucking on it like it was his last meal, he let go of one of your thighs, bringing his fingers to your entrance. Releasing your clit, he gently rubbed it with his thumb, his fingers drawing big circles at your entrance. “You’re so wet for me,” he rasped. “I made you this wet?”
You giggled, gently scratching at his scalp. “You’re so stupid,” you whispered.
“That’s my girl,” he smiled, licking at your clit once again. He elicited a moan from you, your tossing back at the feeling of his fingers entering you. 
“Holy shit,” you all but whined. You could feel the stupid fucking smirk on his face as he pumped his fingers in and out of your core. “Oh, my god, don’t stop.”
That only egged him on further; his fingers moved faster, and it seemed like his tongue was moving faster as well. Eddie was in full concentration mode, your whimpers and moans sounding like heaven to him.
“Oh, shit,” you moaned, looking down at him, seeing nothing but the mop of brown curls you loved so fucking much. “Eddie, I’m gonna cum.”
No words. Nothing came out of his mouth but his tongue licking at your clit relentlessly.
One… two… three more licks and quick pumps of his fingers and you were gone. Gripping his hair as hard as you knew he liked from the horseplay you two would find yourselves in, you came all over his fingers, his tongue wanting a taste.
Your back arched at the feeling of his tongue inside of you as far it could reach, your taste on his tongue.
When he was sure you’d ridden through your orgasm, he kissed his way back up your stomach and sternum, his nose brushing against your chin before his lips found yours, kissing you and letting you taste yourself.
Looking all over your beautiful features when he pulled away, you licked your lips as you slowly opened your eyes, those eyes he loved so much, you hummed and whispered, “Yummy.”
“Shit, princess,” he murmured, hissing when you reached back down to his length, his member still hard as ever. “Goddamn, I can’t wait anymore.”
“Then fuck me, Eddie.” You guided him to your entrance, his hand coming up to hold yours on his length.
“I won’t be able to hold back, baby. I’ve been waiting for this day for a long time.”
Nodding your head as you brought your hand up to cup his cheek, you said, “That’s okay. Give it to me, Eds.”
He kissed you as he pushed into you without warning, a loud gasp coming from your throat, your head tossing back as far as it could on the table.
“Oh my god,” you groaned, loving the full feeling you were getting. “You’re so fucking big.”
“You’re so fucking tight,” he gritted, holding back so much.
“Let go, Eddie, it’s okay. I can take it.”
Pulling his hips back, he looked down at where the two of you were connected before snapping his hips back into yours, a cry of pleasure meeting his ears.
“Fuck! Do it again.”
He didn’t need to be told twice as he pulled his hips back, snapping them back with yours, repeating the motion. “You feel so fucking good, baby. It was like this pussy was made just for me.”
“Yep, whatever you say,” you replied, voice shaky from the bounces your body was taking with each thrust of Eddie’s hips. “Shit, don’t stop. Mmmm, I’m almost there.” 
You went to touch your clit, a whimper escaping you at the feeling of Eddie’s finger circling your sensitive bud. “Just like that,” you breathed. “Don’t fucking stop.”
“Shit, I’m not gonna last much longer,” Eddie groaned. “F-fuck.”
“Cum, Eddie. Cum with me,” you cried out in pleasure.
“Are you–”
“I’m clean, I’m on the pill, and I’m sure, just–” Moan. “Just cum, Eddie, just– oh, my god, don’t stop, don’t stop, don’t–” Another moan filled the air as your second orgasm shot through you, Eddie’s not far behind.
Not wanting to crush you, he rested his weight on his forearms by your head, his forehead resting on yours, both of your eyes closed and heavy breaths mingling. “That… was… amazing.”
“Sure as fuck was,” you agreed, releasing a breathy chuckle.
Eddie’s own breathy chuckle blew over your face before he sighed. Placing his lips on yours again, he took a breath through his nose before pulling slightly back with a small smack from yours lips disconnecting. “I have to pull out of you. I’m kinda growing soft here.”
Giggling, you nodded your head, saying, “Okay,” before whining at the loss of him filling you up. “I miss him already.”
“Who?”
“Your dick.”
He looked at you, confused before bursting out in laughter, your own joining him.
When the two of you were dressed and looking a little fucked out, you helped with his campaign books, carrying them with your own book and his blanket in one arm, the rest of his D&D stuff in his own arm, his free one wrapped around your shoulders, your own free arm wrapped around the middle of his back.
As the two of you walked back to his van, you couldn’t help but smile the whole time, happy that you finally got the boy you’ve been dreaming of.
“So,” Eddie said, after helping you into the passenger seat of his van. “What do you say to me getting high, and then us going to Benny’s for a bite?”
“Uhm, yes to the second as long as I meet my curfew, no to the first because you could actually get caught and I can’t have that.”
“Why not?” he asked, almost whining like a child.
“Because I just got you. I can’t risk losing you to something like weed.”
“But… it’s how I’m–”
“Able to help Wayne, and I adore you for that, but Eddie… it’s not smart to smoke and drive.”
“But - but -”
“No buts.”
Raising a brow at you, while turning his head slightly to the side, he said, “They’re for goats.”
You couldn’t help but grab onto his jacket, pulling him closer to you to press your lips against his, but not before giggling, “You’re so stupid.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N 2:  hi, friends! let me know what you thought! again, please do not hesitate to reblog and give some feedback, whether it be in the reblogs, comments, or my inbox.
Additional Notes: i should've titled this you're so stupid 'cause they said it a lot, lol. so!, just know that if you come into my inbox and ask about you're so stupid, i will be referring to this fic, lol, unless i title another fic you're so stupid.
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Forever / Everything Taglist: @stiles-o-dylan24 @stixnstripesworld @fandom-princess-forevermore @quanticobae @mischiefandi @kellyashcroft @lauren-novak​
If you’re tagged and didn’t want to be, please let me know.
Italics wouldn’t let me tag!
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*Please don’t post my writing anywhere else without my consent. The author of this work will always and forever be @harringtonstilinski​.
All characters, story lines, and plot aside from y/n and her storyline & plot, are all of the work of The Duffer Brothers.
*These works contain material protected under International and Federal Copyright Laws and Treaties. Any unauthorized reprint or use of this material is prohibited.
No part of these works may be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without express written permission from the author / publisher.
Posted on March 29, 2024
512 notes · View notes
princessmaybank · 4 months
Text
Never Have I Ever
Pairings: Rudy x Fem!Co-star!Reader
Warnings: Dual POV, Surprise kiss, alcohol, handjob, oral (both), unprotected p in v, etc.
Summary: You play Never Have I Ever in an interview and secrets get revealed.
Authors Note: This is my first Rudy fic and my first fic in a long time! Should I do more Rudy Fics in the future? Not proof-read and sorry it's so long! Let me know what you think!
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"Hello and welcome back! I'm here with some of the cast of Outer Banks, not everyone was able to make it tonight, but we are happy to have all of you!" The TV host announced to the camera.
"Please go around the couch and introduce yourselves!" They said extremely excited. "Sup, I'm JD, I play Pope." "Hey, I'm Chase, I play John B." "Hi, I'm Rudy Pankow, I get to play JJ Maybank." "Hi guys! I'm Y/F/N Y/L/N! I play Harper!" "Heyyyyy everybodyyyyy I'm Carlacia Grant, I play Cleo!" "And I'm Drew Starkey, I play Rafe Cameron."
Everyone in the audience clapped when the cast was done with their introductions.
"We asked you, the audience, which game you'd like to see them play, and the answer that came out on top was *drum rolls with their fingers on the desk* Never Have I Ever!" The audience cheers, clearly excited to get all the juicy details.
"Now you guys can't get mad at me! These questions were asked by the viewers." The host lets out a laugh. "Sure, we all know these are the spicy questions you want the answer to." JD teases causing the host and audience to laugh.
"Let's get started! You each get a paddle with Have and Have Not on it. You'll turn the paddle depending on your answer, seem simple enough?" The host smiles. "You sure we can't do anything else with the paddle?" Chase smirked with a giggle, which made everyone start laughing. "Dirty mind Chase!" The host announced. "I never said what for!" Chase turned to Rudy and hit him on the arm with the paddle. Rudy didn't even say ow, he just began to pretend to cry.
The audience was loving everything they were hearing from you all. So far the cast has admitted to pranking people on set, forgetting lines, showing up late, improvising lines, things about childhood, some more explicit questions, etc. It was down to the last few questions at this point. Everyone was having fun just sitting and answering these questions, they all learned a bit more about each other.
Y/N's POV:
I can't stand the anxiety I felt when I heard the next question. I didn't want to lie because I'm not a good liar, but I also didn't want anyone to know. "Never Have I Ever had a crush on-set!" The host smiled, waiting for the drama that will ensue with this question.
One by one everyone changed their paddles.
Drew: Never
Carlacia: Never
Chase: I Have
JD: Never
Me: I Have
Rudy: I Have
My eyes nearly popped out of my head when I saw Rudy's paddle flip, but I tried to hide my reaction.
Rudy's POV:
She flipped her paddle to 'I Have'...I don't know if I should be hurt or excited about this. I wonder if she knows. I looked over to Y/N to make sure I wasn't seeing things and her eyes were already on me. I watched as she quickly changed her gaze to something different, it seems like she was flustered or embarrassed.
Y/N's POV:
After our interview was over, we all decided to go grab some dinner together. JD, Chase, and Rudy sat across from Drew, Carlacia and I. After we all ordered we just started a casual conversation about wrapping up filming.
As I reached for my drink I felt a pair of eyes on me. I looked up and immediately spotted Rudy looking at me, he seemed kind of nervous and quickly looked away. I couldn't stop my wandering thoughts. My eyes traveled to his hair, his beautiful, soft, blonde hair that looked so tuggable. I looked at his lips, those plush pink lips, I'd love to feel them on every inch of my body. My teeth bit the inside of my lip as I started feeling a wetness pool between my legs.
I excused myself from the table so I could use the restroom and get my thoughts in order. As I walked out of the bathroom I almost bumped into someone. Without looking up I say sorry. Before I could react I was slammed against the hallway wall with lips pressed against mine. My eyes widened as I realized who has me pinned against the wall.
Rudy's POV:
I couldn't keep myself contained anymore. I said I had to go to the bathroom a few minutes after she left, just so I could have a private moment with her. I just needed to talk. I needed to reveal my true feelings for her, I've sat back in silence for far too long. I thought I would have more time to think about what I would say, but instead she came out of the bathroom almost immediately after I got to the hallway. I panicked, I had no idea what to do so I grabbed her and pinned her to the wall, attached my lips to hers. We both moaned into the kiss and that's when we realized the kiss lasted longer than expected.
The two of us pulled away and stared at each other in shock. "We'll talk later." Is what she whispered to me before heading to the table. I hid in the bathroom for a few minutes before heading back to the others.
Y/N's POV:
'What the hell just happened?' Is what I kept asking myself. It came out of nowhere. When I sat back down Carlacia looked at me with a smirk. I give her a look that says 'what?'. She responded with a whisper in my ear. "Your lipstick is all smudged." She giggled and handed me a compact mirror. I hurry to grab it from her and inspect my makeup.
I felt someone's eyes on me and looked up. Rudy's mouth was covered in red lipstick. Carlacia was the only one to notice and you could easily tell by her face that she was shocked. So were we. Before he could make it to the table I pulled him back to that same hallway as before. "Woah- what'd I do now?" He questioned. I only held the mirror up to his face in response. "You didn't look in the mirror before coming back out?!" I whisper shouted. He only shrugged to my question.
I decided to check the women's restroom and realized no one was in there. I hurriedly pulled him in and towards the sinks after I shut and locked the entrance. I grabbed some paper towels and wet them so he could take off the makeup. "Can you take it off for meee?" He asked so sweetly with those gorgeous, enchanting, blue, puppy dog eyes. I smile and get close to him, inspecting his mouth. His hands found my hips and held me close. My hand with the paper towel found his face and I was going so slow, I didn't want this to end. In fact I wanted to grab him by the face and do it a thousand more times. Those perfect lips.. and I was able to feel them on one part that I needed him tonight, how lucky am I? Gotta get those lips everywhere else next.
We locked eyes for a moment. Rudy looked hungry for more. Before I could ask him anything, he backed me up against the wall as his lips attacked mine again. My hand dropped the paper towel from the sudden jolt. Our eyes were closed but I felt his hands wandering my body. As his fingers inched closer to where I needed him most he pulled away but his arms trapped me against the wall.
"It's me right...it was about me?" He asked with a slight amount of pain in his voice. I looked at him confused. "w-wha-" Before I could even finish my question he interrupted me. "Don't play dumb, you're a smart girl. The game. Your answer to the last question..." He stated with hurt riddling his face. I realized he was talking about the game of never have I ever back at the interview. "Rudy...who else would it be about??" I questioned. He shrugged his shoulders and looked a little insecure in the moment. "I've seen how you look at Drew, and I can't handle the back and forth Y/N." I look at him like he's crazy. "What do you mean how I look at Drew??" I was louder and sounded upset now. "You look at him like you want to marry him or ya know, like at least fuck him.." My eyes nearly popped out of my head when Rudy spoke. "Rudy. I don't like Drew like that! He's always been just a friend and more like a brother!" I take a moment to look into his eyes and it looks like they flash for a second. "I've only liked one person on set this entire time and that's you Rudy." He paints a sad smile on his face before speaking. "I'm sorry I assumed." His head drops along with his arms. I'm not sure what to say, so I wrapped my arms around his waist and pulled him close. My head rested on his chest and we just held each other.
Our moment didn't last much longer. We heard a knock on the bathroom door and I remembered the door was locked. I pushed Rudy into a stall and told him not to come out. I finally opened the door and I have to say Carlacia was the last person I expected to see at the moment.
"Are you okay? You've been over here a long time, JD is checking on Rudy too." My eyes go wide as she says Rudy's name. "Oh - I uhm I'm sure he's fine." Almost on cue JD runs over. "He's not in there and he's not picking up his phone!" He rushed, freaking out about his best friend. "I'm sure he's okay." I smiled but that made Carlacia give me a squint. "Let me in." She sounded firm, I just shook my head no as she continued to repeat her statement. "Y/N. I'm getting in there one way or another. I suggest the easier way." When the word 'no' left my lips she immediately pushed past me, followed by JD with his hands over his eyes.
"Rudyyyy, ya in here buddy?" JD asked from behind his hands. Carlacia moved his hands and pointed to the closed stall that had some nice dress shoes sitting at the bottom. "Just give it up, come on out.." I said slowly. He made his way out and we were immediately questioned. We told them everything besides the kissing and that we are deeply in love, but I don't think it's important information anyway. He came up with the brilliant idea of saying my lips bumped into his and that's why he had the lipstick on him. Note my sarcasm when I said brilliant.
They could tell we were lying and hiding information but they just let it be as we walked back to Drew and Chase.
It didn't take long for us to pack up and leave. Rudy and I decided to just take our food to go so we wouldn't be a burden to the others. Drew drove here and Chase lived nearby so he took him home. Carlacia also drove here and as I pleaded for her to let me get a ride home, she pulled JD into her car. "Enjoy your ride." She winked and looked at Rudy, causing a blush to run to my cheeks. Before I could say anything else she drove off. "I'll drive you home." Rudy smiled at me. I nodded to him as a thank you before getting in his car.
The ride was silent up until now, well except for the radio, but we had been trapped in a sexual tension that felt tighter any time one of us tried to talk. Rudy was the one to break it of course, I never would've had the balls to do it. "You're a damn good kisser.." he smirked. "but next time, don't smear your lipstick all over my face." He glanced over to me with a sultry smile. I couldn't help the giggle that escaped my lips when I heard him. The response I had stopped halfway up my throat when I realized he said 'next time'. There was a next time??? Thank fuck. My heart nearly exploded as I played his words over in my head.
The car came to a stop before I could get myself too soaked from the memories. "Welcome home." He said gesturing to my house. But when I turned my head to look at my house I saw that it in fact was not mine. "This is your house Rudy..." He only nodded in response before he got out and helped me out of his car. Rudy somehow persuaded me to come in for a little while to hang out or talk or something. It honestly didn't take much, I'm whipped for this man.
I was sat on his couch when Rudy came up behind me, handing a glass of wine to me. Before he came around the couch to sit with me, his hand lingered on my shoulder, squeezing a few times. His arm wrapped around my shoulders as he sipped on his drink I could only assume it was some type of whiskey.
"Can I ask you something?" I asked with a hint of liquid courage running through my veins. He nodded as he placed his lips on his glass once again. "How long have you liked me?" He let out some air he was holding in and set his drink on the table in front of us. "Well..." He started, snuggling closer to me. "it hasn't been too long...just since the second week of filming this season." That was nearly a year ago. Not too long my ass. "Why didn't you say anything?" I pried. "Why didn't you?" His crystal blue orbs finally stared back into mine. His lips were formed into a teasing smirk but when neither of us decided to break the silence, his face fell. Rudy's eyes never strayed from mine, in fact as I stared back into his, I noticed they only got darker when he began looking between my eyes and my lips.
Before we both knew it, Rudy's hand cupped my cheek and pulled my lips to meet his. Fireworks started to explode in my chest as our little kiss suddenly got more heated. He pulled me onto his lap and our bodies started to work together to create the friction we both desperately craved.
"Ah shit-" He pulled us apart. "how far ya wanna take this baby..?" He heaved out as my heart fluttered from the nickname. Without saying anything I slid off of his lap while his head was thrown back, gasping in air, trying to catch his breath. My knees touched the ground while my hands ran up and down his thighs.
"Before I continue...is this okay?" I ask with a squeeze to his thighs. "Yes.." He said so quietly I barely heard him. My hands spread his legs farther apart and my lips pressed to the zipper holding back his erection. I peppered kisses all around his bulge and thighs. "M-more please.." He begged, caressing my cheek.
My fingers laced around his belt buckle and tore the accessory from his body. While I was tossing it to the side, Rudy slid his dress pants down. I removed them from his ankles and threw them over with the belt. "These too.." I tugged on the waistband of his briefs.
He happily and eagerly obliged. When his cock sprung free from his fabric-jail, my eyes grew wider. Rudy was big, and I don't just mean 'big' to boost his ego, I mean I am actually scared this man will hurt me with his size.
Rudy must've noticed my stare and concern based on his reply. "It will fit.. I'll make it fit baby." He chuckled lightly. A redness rushed to my cheeks as I heard him call me that nickname again.
Before I could waste anymore time, I wrapped my hand around the base of his thick cock. He immediately grunted from the contact and threw his head back. Rudy only met my eyes after he heard me spit and felt my saliva running down his length. I quickly moved my hand to spread the wetness around, followed by a few more spits to completely cover him. His breathing was heavy, I could tell by how his chest was rising and falling.
Rudy's eyes met mine when my hand began moving for his pleasure. A small moan escaped his throat as I continued slowly. "f-fuck...fas-faster baby..." I pumped him a few more times then slid my mouth around him. This took him by surprise but he wasn't complaining. His hand met the back of my head, he wasn't pushing me, only rested it there, making sure I didn't stop. My head bobbed up and down as I gagged on his dick. Our eyes met, mine full of tears, his full of pleasure.
His thumbs pressed to my cheeks and wiped away stray tears, that I tried so hard to not let slip out. "Don't stop..please baby.." There were those butterflies in my stomach. He reached out and helped me go up and down on him.
Now he was forcing my head down and thrusting into my mouth and down my throat. "Ah..fuck..so good, so fuckin' good." He hissed. My eyes were closed, somehow helping with the blissful abuse I was receiving. "Such a good fuckin' girl for me...c'mon take my cum baby.." He groaned. His hips spasmed as his load shot down my throat.
I swallowed it all down and left his dick with a 'pop' sound. My lips licked at the fluids daring to escape. We both sat back for a moment and caught our breath. With a small smirk and light laugh Rudy stared at me. "What?" I chuckled. "I'm gonna fuck you so good..I haven't came that hard since high school." He said in amazement. All I could do was smile at his promise.
Rudy's POV:
She looked so good on her knees for me. Her hair is a mess no thanks to me. Also lipstick smeared, mascara running down her cheeks, a mix of cum and spit slipping from her swollen lips, once again all me. I saw her catch her breath and lick her lips, swallowing the mixture. She is so beautiful, I couldn't help but let out a giggle while watching her. "What?" She let her own giggle slip out. "I'm gonna fuck you so good..I haven't came that hard since high school." I meant it too. Every word. Her smile was enough to let me know she was happy about my statement.
We took a few more breaths before I pulled her up onto my lap. I held her close and captured her lips with my own. My hands cupped her ass and squeezed every time her hips grinded into me.
Y/N was desperate to get my shirt off. I sat there naked, with a pretty girl, clothed, in my lap. My hands wandered under her shirt, and she helped me remove it from her body. She whined every time our lips were pulled away from each other, which made my dick twitch under her.
When our lips found the others again, we kissed with much hunger and even more passion. What I said in the car came back to me. Something about not smearing her lipstick on me next time. Too fuckin' late. It's true we did like each other, and I'm mentally kicking myself for having sex with her before taking her on a date first. Though we both agreed to this, I feel bad that this is how it's starting. I promised myself to definitely take her out for a nice dinner or whatever the hell she wants to do, after this.
I was thrown out of my overthinking when she left my lap. "What's wrong?" Oh no. Could she hear my thoughts? I squinted and began to think of random things, testing out the telekinesis.
Pizza.
42.
Barbie.
Super Mario Bros.
Y/N.
Her perfect tits.
Her plump ass.
Her stripping in front of me.
Wait.
Her stripping in front of me?!
I was pulled back in, again. This time she was standing in front of me, giving me a strip tease. Y/N wiggled her ass in my face while she was bent over and shimmying out of her pants. My dick was standing at attention, waiting to get fondled. I couldn't help myself. My right hand found my dick and slowly pumped, I was still a little sensitive but I overall didn't give a shit. My left hand reached out and slapped her ass. She hadn't expected it based on her little jump. That only excited me more when I saw it jiggle. Her delicate fingers found her pretty lace thong and tugged down slowly. My jaw nearly dropped when I saw her dripping wet cunt.
Once again I couldn't contain myself. I let go of my cock and spread her legs. My hands squeezed her ass at the same time my tongue played with her perfect pussy. She tipped forward and placed her hands on the coffee table, trying to steady her shaky legs. I felt like I could bust again just from her moans alone. They were so small and precious, my eyes rolled back from the mix of her moans and the taste of her pussy.
Next I shoved my tongue inside her tight hole, swirling it around, making sure I reached every spot I possibly could. Like the needy little girl she is..she started pushing back onto my tongue. Y/N was fucking herself with my tongue. I could only ever dream of this moment.
"Fuck- I'm gonna cum.." She whined. Her legs were shaking as my tongue only quickened its movements. My fingers found her clit, and moved in harsh circles in hopes of tipping her over the edge. My other arm wrapped around her waist to support her when she releases.
"Oh Rudy, fuck-!" She humped my tongue again as her liquid poured out of her juicy pussy and onto my tongue. I swallowed every drop before I turned her around and pulled her onto my lap again.
Y/N took my head in her hands and our mouths made a mess together. Her hands pulled on my golden locks while my hands snaked between us. I grabbed my cock and teased her entrance with my tip. "Please.." She begged, gasping for air. "Please what baby? Use your words." I teased. "Mmm please fuck me.." She whined rolling her head back.
I didn't waste anymore time teasing. My dick slipped right inside of her. We both let out a hiss as she slid down onto my cock. "Mmm.. so good.." She whimpered while my hips rocked softly back and forth. Y/N gently grinded down on my dick, simply being needy. "C'mon Rudy... please..." She whined some more.
I couldn't handle it anymore, so I flipped our position, she was laying on the couch with me on top of her. My dick never slipped out of her either. Before I moved inside of her, I brought my lips to hers. Our moans consumed each other as my hips slapped against hers. "Oh fuck mmm...Y/N..." I grunted into her mouth. Her eyes rolled back and I quickened my pace. "Hard-harder..." She breathed out. What my girl wants, she gets, so I pounded harder against her. I felt her sweet little pussy start to clench around me and I knew she was almost there. I felt her nails start digging into my back which was almost enough to throw me over. "I'm gonna cum Rudy- I'm gonna cum..." Y/N panted. Never thought I'd hear those words come from her perfect pink lips, but I'm glad they came out. "Me too baby, mmm cum with me.." I said grunting as I pulled myself from her pussy. Her fingers found her clit and she screamed my name. That was enough for me as I fisted my cock. My cum shot out onto her, covering almost every part of her. Some hit her face, a good bit landed on her tits, and the rest spilled onto her stomach. We were riding out our highs together, catching our breaths.
We both let out a loving laugh when we came back down. "Can't believe that just happened.." She giggled. "In a good way or bad way?" I questioned. She rolled her eyes and told me good obviously. Just wanted to hear her say it. "So where does our relationship stand?" She asked sheepishly. "Where do you want it to stand? I'm happy to throw a label on this baby." I pointed my first finger back and forth between us. "I wanna be with you..." She said while twiddling her fingers. I could feel my heart nearly burst out of my chest from her confession. I nodded and pulled her onto me so we were cuddling. "I want the same thing baby." I pressed a small kiss to her lips. "Will you be my girlfriend?" I asked, praying that she wasn't playing with my feelings. "It would be an honor." She smiled and kissed my lips with a bit of passion. "Wanna go again?" Y/N asked, full of eagerness. She bit her lip as she awaited my response. I bit my lip and nodded. She came closer before I pulled her down to kiss me again. Never have I ever thought of a better way to end my night.
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jtargaryen18 · 2 months
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His Inheritance ~ Chapter 35 Preview
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Coming soon...
"You are almost ready," Yelena said with a smile, just after the stylists left. "Now the jewelry."
You paused, looking at your reflection in the mirror. Your gown was an exclusive creation by a top designer, a beautiful sleeveless, a-line creation in layers of tulle, sequins, and matte satin. Shades of pale blue and gold transformed you, enhanced by the ornate way your hair was done, the subtelty of your carefully applied makeup. Beneath you wore the most elegant little gold heels that were surprising comfortable despite their minimal style. The stockings were sheer, hugging your upper thighs just below the skimpy ice-blue panties you wore.
The mention of jewelry brought up an unhappy memory and you knew Yelena recalled it too when your gaze met hers. How your husband's ex-mistress smuggled her necklace in for you to wear on another special occasion had never been solved.Had it been Neal? Hansen? A reminder from the not-too-distant past that your enemies could reach you at any time. A reminder to be vigilant. 
"What jewelry?" you asked carefully.
Yelena smiled. "I picked it up myself," she told you, lifting a delicate strand of diamonds set in gold from a black velvet box on the bed. 
When she draped it around your throat, you smiled at the way it completed your look. There were matching earrings, diamond studs each with a teardrop diamond dangling and catching the light. The set was exquisite. 
"Harry Winston," your friend told you, admiring how they looked on you.
"Nice of them to loan them to us for the ball," you told her, grateful you got to wear them. 
Yelena reached for the golden mask on the bed, holding it to you. "No loan. Steve bought them."
What?
"These must have cost a fortune," you mused. They probably cost more than everything else you owned combined. "Glad you're going with us. I'd hate to get mugged for these."
Yelena grinned. "Security is going to be tight already with the mayor there, one of the state senators. So many wealthy, important people like you."
That had you scoffing. "I'm no one special. At least not in the world of such important, political figures."
"But you are," Yelena told you. 'The fact that everyone wants you has been a powerful motivator in this game of chess. Your husband is completely devoted to you. Barnes would love to get his hands on you."
"Barnes would ring my neck the first chance he got," you pointed out.
Yelena's expression was difficult to read. "I'm not so sure about that."
"Hansen would for sure kill me," you said, putting your mask in place carefully. A soft mask of golden sequins that fit over your eyes. 
Yelena's gaze dropped at the mention of that name and you were ashamed. You needed to work harder not to bring that up to her. And you needed a subject change. Fast.
"Who's going to be here with Nat tonight?" You weren't surprised Nat didn't want to go. She'd been through so much between the horrific end of her abusive marriage and all trauma of years being left to the sadistic nature of Banner. You wanted to make sure she was well looked after while you and Steve were gone.
"Clint is staying here of course," Yelena said quietly. "Dyson will be here too. He's arranged for extra security for the house tonight."
You nodded your approval. "What about Scott?"
"He's coming with us," Yelena explained. 
That had you smiling. Sure, Scott would keep you and Steve safe, but he also got time with Yelena. You were pretty sure Yelena knew Scott's infatuation with her. Would she ever return his affections? You didn't know. Considering her tragic history, you weren't sure she could feel the same way towards him or anyone. But since you'd known Scott, you learned he was a good man who always had your back and never once questioned your authority. You trusted him with your life. You trusted him with Yelena, too.
But would she ever give him - or anyone - a chance after all that she'd been through?
You blew out an exhale, preparing yourself for the night ahead. "I guess we should let Steve know that I'm ready."
"He knows," a deep voice caught you and Yelena both off guard. 
Your husband strolled into the bedroom and Yelena stepped back to allow him a clear path to you. He looked breathtakingly handsome in the classic black tuxedo he wore, tailored perfectly to fit his tall, broad-shouldered physique. His tawny hair was perfectly styled, diamond cufflinks winking in the light. His tie was shades of gold and blue to match your gown, a subtle touch but one you appreciated.
Steve moved to stand behind you in the mirror of your vanity, bending to fit his handsome face in the reflection with yours. 
"You look so beautiful," he said with something like reverence in his voice. "I can't wait to show you off."
"I'll be downstairs," Yelena said, making her way out to give you some privacy. "We worked very hard on her, boss. Don't mess her up."
Steve smiled at what he took as a playful warning, his large hands smoothing over your bare shoulders. Slowly, you removed the mask, placing it in your lap with your hands. His watchful gaze didn't miss the slight tremble of their movements.
"Everything is going to be fine," he explained. "I've been to this event before. All the rich, politic elite of Boston come out dance and drink the night away and wallow in excess. It's probably Tony's favorite night of the year."
You could see it. And you were excited to go to the annual masquerade ball, as Steve's wife and not his trophy, and to enjoy a fabulous night on the town. You felt like Cinderella, going to the ball in the gown that truly looked as if magic had created it.
But you couldn't fight back an impending sense of dread. It had been so quiet in the weeks of your recovery and Steve's. Life went on. You were included in all the family's business meetings. The family business had recovered and was branching out, deals with three of the other four families made things even better. 
Not that you agreed with all of it. You weren't crazy about the loan sharking or protection deals the family made. The casinos and restaurants didn't bother you as much. And at least the family wasn't making any money off drugs or trafficking. Some of the stories you heard now that you were more involved were just horrified. You made up your mind early that no matter what, you'd never allow the family to make money off the misfortunes of women and children. Never.
It had been very quiet where the Barnes family was concerned. Too quiet.
"I'll  be the envy of every man there tonight," he murmured, pressing a kiss into your neck. The soft brush of his beard made you shiver.
A sensual smiled curved Steve's lips. "Are you ready?"
You nodded. You trusted your husband. You were going to do your best to have a wonderful night, just like he intended.
And still that little kernel of dread lingered.
You felt like you were in an old Hollywood movie to walk down the staircase on your husband's arm with the gown flowing softly with your movements. Honestly, you were grateful for Steve's help in keeping you balanced, relieved when you made it to the bottom of the stairs.
Dyson, Yelena, Scott, Clint and Nat were a small crowd, watching in admiration as you approached. Nat's smile was all you needed to feel like you got the look right. Her lovely green eyes lit up as her gaze swept over you. 
"You look perfect," she exclaimed, carefully hugging you. "I knew that gown was the one."
Nat had been the one to find it when the two of you went out shopping. And you were all too happy to give her the credit. You knew very little about fashion, seasons, all of it. You would learn. But until you did, it was nice to have the advice of someone who already understood it.
As Nat stepped back, you forced yourself to smile. She still looked so small, so frail. She had yet to gain weight and regain her amazing figure. Your sister-in-law seemed fragile, even with the protection and love of the man she'd always wanted. Even with the full support and love of her brother. It worried you.
Dyson looked worried too, but as you did, he put on a quick smile. "You two had best get going. The line at dropoff takes forever."
"True enough," Steve said, nodding to Yelena and Scott.
You stopped to hug Dyson. "Keep her safe for me," you whispered.
"You know I will," he muttered.
Steve whisked you away to the sleek black limousine waiting in the driveway. Scott climbed in behind the wheel and Yelena rode shotgun as Steve got you into the back seat, helping you keep your gown away from the doors. Once you were settled, you studied your husband. Something was missing.
"Did you bring a mask?" you asked him. 
Steve smiled, pulling a small black mass from inside his tuxedo coat. No sequins, just a matte black mask he could wear. But he wasn't interested in the mask as he fidgeted with it. He was too busy staring at you.
"Are you excited?" he asked.
You couldn't help the smile that question brought on. "Yes."
Steve looked pleased. "As time goes on and things settle down, we'll get out more. Do more things like this. You look like a fairytale princess tonight."
Tears pricked at the backs of your eyes at his heartfelt words. He meant them. He was taking you out to a society function, dressed you up like you were going to the fucking Oscars. A night out like nothing you'd ever experienced before. You'd been excited since he told you he got the tickets two weeks ago.
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deception-united · 5 months
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hi!! just found your blog :))
so i've been wondering if you have any tips on writing characters in general. i feel like everytime i write, they're all the same (their internal dialogue are hardly different from each other) and rather boring and bland. do you have any advice for this issue? thanks <33
Hi, thanks for asking! It's a common challenge for writers, myself included, to create characters who feel vivid and distinct on the page—especially when there's a particular type of character that I enjoy writing more. This induces reluctance to explore and can make characters too similar in their mannerisms, quirks, and speech. Here are some tips to help you develop more dynamic characters:
Create detailed character profiles: Before you start writing, take some time to flesh out your characters. Think about their backgrounds, personalities, motivations, fears, desires, and quirks. The more you know about your characters, the easier it will be to make them unique.
Give each character a distinct voice: Pay attention to the way each character speaks and thinks. Consider their education, background, and personality when crafting their dialogue and internal monologue. Each character should have their own vocabulary, speech patterns, and mannerisms (see my post on character voices for more!).
Focus on contradictions: People are complex, and characters should be too. Think about the contradictions within each character. Maybe they're confident in public but insecure in private, or they're fiercely independent but secretly crave companionship. These contradictions add depth and realism to your characters.
Use character flaws: Flaws are incredibly important. They make characters more relatable and multidimensional, causing internal conflict and affecting their decisions, actions, and relationships. Give your characters weaknesses, insecurities, and vices that they struggle with throughout the story. These flaws can drive the plot and create opportunities for growth and development.
Explore character relationships: Characters are shaped by their interactions with others. Pay attention to the dynamics between your characters and how they influence each other. Conflict, friendship, love, and rivalry can all reveal different facets of your characters' personalities.
Give your characters goals: What does each character want, and what are they willing to do to achieve it? Their goals can drive the plot forward and provide insight into their motivations and priorities.
Consider the environment: Characters are influenced by their surroundings. Think about how factors like culture, society, family, and upbringing shape your characters' identities and behavior.
Allow for character growth: Characters should change and evolve over the course of the story. Give them opportunities to learn from their experiences, overcome challenges, and develop as individuals.
Read widely and observe people: Pay attention to how people behave in real life and in literature. Study how different authors create memorable characters, and consider what techniques you can apply to your own writing.
Check out this ask game for inspiration!
Hope this helped ❤
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lesbianrobin · 2 months
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Hi for a writer new to writing 911 fics what are some key character points that you think are really important for capturing the vibes of Buck and Eddie?
omg HIII 🫶🏻🫶🏻
so first off i also consider myself New to writing 911 fics fmvjdjc but i assume since ur asking Me of all people you like one/some of my fics enough to think i am an authority which rules. thank u that's so sweet. ANYWAY on to my actual advice.
buck: you know that john mulaney bit where he's saying he's a terrible driver and he's like "i hear you honking and i also don't want me to be doing what i'm doing. i don't like that i'm in that lane either. and i sure would like to get out of it." that is buck in basically every aspect of his life besides being a firefighter. his problem is that he won't pull over long enough to figure out what the hell he's doing. buck acts before he thinks and only Later does he even consider like hey Why did i do that. What was i feeling. What was i trying to accomplish. which often results in him behaving selfishly and hurting others (see: lawsuit, Entire Relationship With Taylor Kelly, maiming eddie during a basketball game, coming to the erroneous conclusion that he was jealous over tommy rather than eddie) as well as behaving recklessly and risking his own life under the cover of heroism and necessity.
as far as more like. basic character things go. buck can be kinda dumb And smart at the same time. people often swing really hard in one direction or the other and i think it does buck a disservice. like, yeah, he loves his fun facts and research spirals and books, he clearly has a love for learning, but he's also not the Best at critical analysis of his sources and maybe has a tendency to take things at face value. like i do fear that buck could be persuaded to join an essential oils mlm.
ALSO buck is a weirdo like yes he Can be charming but he also has chronic foot-in-mouth disease and says shit like "oh we didn't kill him we just WANTED to!" TO THE COPS. WHEN BEING QUESTIONED ABOUT A MURDER. i think buck is just constantly rolling either nat ones or nat twentys when it comes to charisma.
i also think it's important to keep in mind that while buck can be deeply insecure, that insecurity doesn't Usually manifest in him like. noticeably withdrawing into himself or trudging sadly around like a kicked puppy. his response to that insecurity is most often to be loud, to lash out, or to overcompensate (see: his entire personality in s1, eddie's introduction, befriending red and taking on his end of life care, swearing to abby that he'll rescue her fiancé and risking his own life to do it, etc).
ok i think i've yapped enough ab buck SO!
eddie: i actually feel like way less confident prescribing advice for writing eddie fmvkdjc so this'll probably be shorter than the buck section. as far as the Basics go i think people can often characterize eddie as very like serious and grim but he rly is not! he's a very silly guy! mostly with chris and buck, but also a bit with carla and linda and the rest of the 118. i think eddie is a guy who can behave very differently depending on how comfortable he is around somebody, and there are many parts of himself that he keeps locked down around others.
eddie thinks about his feelings and motivations before acting in a way that buck typically doesn't, but that doesn't mean he's correctly assessing those feelings and motivations. eddie is an incredibly unreliable narrator when it comes to his own life! he'll feel the desire to do something (for example, dating ana or going from active firefighting to a desk job) and Then construct his conscious reasoning for it (i'm ready to move on from shannon and i like her, chris will feel better and it's better for him if i have a safe job) while avoiding his Deeper feelings and motivations (the compulsion to give chris A Mother so that he feels like less of a failure as a father, his own ptsd and other mental health struggles in the wake of the shooting).
this doesn't mean that eddie is entirely emotionally unintelligent! he just kinda hates himself and he's deeply repressed and he often feels that he can't do things For Him, they all have to be For Chris.
ok that's like most of what i've got for now i'm rly not an authority on eddie but i tried my best 😭
as a duo: i think the #1 thing to remember when writing buck and eddie is that they're best friends and they understand each other better than anybody else in their lives. like that doesn't mean that they're always on the same page but they Do canonically recognize each other's feelings and motivations most of the time and after the lawsuit/street fighting era, they always respond to each other with patience and care when one of them is having a rough time.
like i think you actually have to try Very hard to justify it if you're gonna have buck and eddie miscommunicating and seriously arguing with each other in a fic. i remember when everyone was like omgggg buck is gonna LOSE IT ON EDDIE when he finds out about kim!! and then when buck Did find out about kim he was literally just worried about eddie and talked to him about it and asked the questions that eddie Needed to be asked so that he could work through his feelings and address the situation. buck and eddie just have a knack for knowing what the other person needs, and they're at a point where they will go to each other for help and be openly vulnerable!
and they have fun together! they're silly! see: "locked room mystery" "locked Yard mystery", the whole bachelor party, eddie being like buck Pwease can we look for the treasure together 🥺, etc etc. they just enjoy being together and i think that is so crucial to writing them.
final thoughts: in general my #1 piece of advice for writing fic is to rewatch the show/clips from the show when you're trying to capture a character's voice. i do not do this nearly as often as i should bc i am lazy but it rly is deeply helpful for making sure that they sound like themselves!
i would also advise that even if your fic is buddie-centric, it helps to include the other characters in even small ways. our relationships with others are central to who we are! references to other characters like chris, maddie, chim, etc. can go a long way toward making buck and eddie feel like themselves.
thank you again for asking me!! it's really really flattering. i hope this was of some help to you!!
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galaxostars · 3 months
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Transfest celebration
Hi everyone ! Pride month may be over but Transfest is still very much on going and so many beautiful fics/art keep coming out every day, so feel free to check them out and give them some much deserved love <3
I will be reblogging this post every time a new work comes out so stay tuned for that + the authors' reveal next week!
The Magic of You : 13.9k, E, Petunia/Severus, James/Lily, Eileen/Tobias
One cigarette can change everything. Or when two people realise they are far more alike than they are different.
can i tell you something? : 2.7k, G, Regulus/Remus
Regulus needs to tell Remus something.
What Are Friends For? : 2k, M, Draco/Harry, Hermione/Ron
Draco offers to help Harry out with a certain problem he’s having, courtesy of starting T.
Sun's out, Guns out : art, T, Charlie Weasley
Charlie Weasley has much to be proud about. All his scars are fucking cool, the dragon claws, the eyebrow slit, the stretch marks on his hips, and ... oh yeah : his top surgery scars ! Charlie Weasley is a hot transmasc dude, what do you want more from me i'm thirsting
Full Indulgence : 14.7k, E, Fleur/Nymphadora, Nymphadora/Bill, Fleur/Nymphadora/Bill
Tonks and Bill used to fuck. Bill met Fleur, and friends-with-benefits became friends again. Now, Bill’s engaged to Fleur. Tonks thinks Fleur is hot. Really hot. Tonks cannot stop thinking about her. Bill finds out. Bill has a solution. Tonks is caught in the middle, in the best way possible.
brother, I've returned : 2.7k, G, Regulus & Sirius
Sirius and Regulus reunite after their parents' deaths. written for the HP TransFest, prompt #82: Brother, Madds Buckley or FTM Sirius left home many years ago. After his parents death he must return for the reading of the will and face the brother he left behind
I don't wanna be anything other than me : 4.3k, T, Sirius/Remus
Remus has been thinking about confiding in the boys that he is trans and a werewolf, because he is tired of hiding who he is. Lily is his best friend, but living in the girl's dormitory is taking it's toll. A story of friendship, opening up to others, and accceptance. Prompt 33: Remus ftm taking to McGonagall and the boys about switching dorms
your friends are a fate that befell me : 12.8k, E, Regulus/Sirius, Regulus/James
Self prompted : Established Sirius/Regulus, Sirius wants Regulus to make James feel better after his breakup
Fawning Over You by toxik_angel - a Podfic podfic length 4.5-5 hours, E, Draco/Harry
Harry's not sure which would be worse: Ron and Hermione finding out he buys Draco Malfoy's premium pornography and an extra gift off his wishlist every week, or Draco Malfoy finding out Harry has a horrible, distracting, embarrassing crush on him. Alt title: Whore-ton Hears a Harry.
force our smiles, baby, half dead (from comparing myself to everyone else around me) : 3.8k, M, Remus/James
Five times James was asked how he was feeling + one time Remus was asked the same.
The bleedin' hearts, the arts and that other stuff : 55.9k, E, Remus/James, Dorcas/Lily, Regulus/Sirius, Barty/Pandora/Evan
Sometimes "coming out" means going stealth with your hookup. Sometimes "going stealth" means that your hookup gets the wrong idea that you (a book-loving pacifist who writes self-proclaimed sad boi music in your spare time) are a repeat offender in the back alley knife fight department. Oops? It's all fun and games in love and war for Remus and James until somebody gets hurt. This is a FINISHED FIC With an eleventh chapter - epilogue coming post-creator reveals <33
Between These Walls : 40k, E, Harry/Severus, Luna/Rolf Scamander
Casting an eye to his former student, Severus saw Potter’s head loll onto the thin pillow. The young man faced the ceiling, expression inert and dull. Why was he in a hospital bed next to Potter three years after the war? In which Harry quits the Auror force to recover from a bout of depression, Severus starts an owl-order business from his country house, and they both learn what it means to be in a relationship for the first time.
Wine Drunk : 2.8k, T, Sirius/Remus
Prompt: Sirius is falling in love with new member of order (remus homeschooled) and notices several things and tries to put together pieces
It's not over yet : 6.9k, T, Lily & Severus, Poppy & Severus
Taking self-made potions and performing a ritual at Ostara in his fourth year - Severus Snape had thought of many aspects while planning his transition. Was there something he purposefully ignored until the last second? Certainly. Severus struggles to navigate both his parents' reaction and the reality he has to face: people will ask questions regarding his new form. Severus is sure he is no "young woman" but rather a lad, yet telling other people is intimidating. At least he got his friends and a surprise ally.
moving into me : 5.2k, T, Hermione/Ron
Veronica "Ronny" Weasley always knew something was "off" but Ronny didn't understand what it was until the Yule Ball shenanigans during fourth year. Submitted for 2024 Trans Fest Prompt 6: "Trans male Ron who doesn’t realize/come out until a few years into Hogwarts."
Make sure to leave some kudos and comments to the authors 🏳️‍⚧️🫶🏻
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sillygoose067 · 4 months
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Charles’s Angel(s)
Ch. 36
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Charles Leclerc x Reader
Warnings: SMUT-- oral(fem. receiving), fingering, nipple sucking, brief praise kink, mostly soft smut, lots of kissing, let me know if I missed anything.
Author’s Note: This is my first time writing smut. Was kinda skeptical while writing it so, yeah. Lmk if I should continue the scene in the next chapter or cut it off here.
Moving in with Charles was definitely an adjustment. You’d never believed all the sayings about living with men, but you understood now. Although, you knew that they came as a package deal, you were quickly learning a lot of new things about your boyfriend. He was relatively neat most of the time. He spent time streaming games with his friends. He liked to play the piano in his free time, or when there was a lot on his mind. He liked trying new recipes, even if he was a potential hazard in the kitchen (you made sure to keep an eye on him while he was in there). He liked to spend his time reading, cozied up in the loveseat, rather than on electronic devices. He loved to keep music playing around the house. 
Somehow, all of these little quirks made you fall in love with him a little more, no matter how frustrating he could be sometimes. 
Unbeknownst to you, Charles also noticed little things while accommodating you.
“Baby?”
“Hmm?”
“Are you ogling me?”, Charles asked, his back to you as he grabbed his clothes from the drawers, only in a towel. 
“Yes”
This makes him turn towards you. He raises an eyebrow. “I didn’t think you’d be such a pervert, Cheri.”
“Yeah, well, I’m only a pervert for you.”
The other eyebrow goes up now, and his arms are crossed across his chest, a look of mild surprise on him. “I wasn’t aware you had such a dirty mouth– Or mind, for that matter– either.”
You shrug, a smirk playing on your lips. Within seconds, he’s in front of you, pulling your lips to his. Instinctually, your arms wrap around his shoulders, tugging him closer by the nape. 
You pull away, noses brushing, keeping your lips a hair’s breadth away from his, pulling back each time he tries to capture the soft tissue– teasing him. You bite your lip. 
“Charles?”, you whisper. It felt wrong to speak out loud in intimate moments like these. 
“What, Y/n?”. A frustrated puff of air against your lips. 
You chew your lip some more, hesitating. Charles pulls your lip from under your teeth, soothing the swollen skin with his thumb. He can’t stand it when you do that– it makes something wild in him come alive. 
“I think I’m ready. To go… all the way.”
You feel his breath stutter, and his grip on your hips tightens. Your eyes meet, and you can tell he’s searching for assurance. 
“Y/n baby, are you sure? You don’t need to rush. If you’re worried about my needs, don’t– I can take care of myself, I just want you to feel safe and certain–”
You cup his cheek and bring your lips together, shutting him up. “I want this Charles.”
When your lips meet again, you can tell that something’s changed in him. Your boyfriend moves the two of you more comfortably on the bed, only breaking momentum to tear off your tank top and shorts. You’re panting, hair spread around you like a halo. Charles crushes himself onto you, trying to deepen the kiss, and then you feel it. A thick, solid form pressing into your hip, and you gasp. “Is that…?”
Charles kisses the corner of your lip. “Yes. Is that alright?”
You whimper in response. Involuntarily pushing your breasts into him, arching to feel more of him against you. He kisses your face– nose, cheeks, forehead. “Can I make love to you, angel?”, he whispers against your temple. 
“Please”, you whine, chasing after his lips. 
He pulls away with a chuckle. Oh how the tables have turned, you think. “I need to hear you say it Y/n”, he says, tracing your cheekbone with his thumb. 
“Yes, Charles, please. Want you”, you breathe against his lips. 
Without wasting a second, Charles’ arm reaches behind you and unclasps your bra. With one hand. You feel yourself beginning to soak your panties. Your breasts bounce free, and Charles pulls away, sitting up, his eyes wandering over you. You feel a blush creeping up at his scrutiny and move to cover yourself up, but your boyfriend is faster. 
“Never hide yourself from me, Cheri. You’re so beautiful”, he says as he moves your arms away, only to replace them with his hands, cupping your breasts. His touch is so warm, that you push the malleable mounds further into his grip, reveling in the featherlight brushes against your nipples. 
Charles kisses his way down to your chest, leaving a trail of lovebites. He brushes his thumb against a nipple, watching how it swells under his touch, and then flicks his tongue against the nub, leaving it glistening with spit. You shiver as the saliva cools against your skin– and then is enveloped in warmth. You let out a moan as you feel his mouth close around your breast, tongue playing with your nipple, teeth scraping against the sensitive skin. He treats the other nipple the same way once he deems that he’s spent enough time on one side. 
Pressing butterfly kisses up to your collar and nipping here and there, finally connecting lips with you, chuckling against them when you whine for him to hurry. “Let me worship you, my love.” you clench around nothing at the feel of the rumbling of his chest, the vibrations making your nipples tingle as they rub against his pecs. 
He makes his way down once again, down your sternum, down your stomach, all the way to the waistband of your panties. Fingers curling under the fabric, bunching it at your hips, he keeps his eyes on yours as he leaves a smattering of kisses right above your mound, slowly pulling the cloth down. He taps your hip to lift, and you do so nervously. Before removing your panties completely, he stops and checks with you again. “Are you sure you want to go through with this baby?”
With your lip caught between your teeth (a nervous habit), you take a breath and nod, attempting to stabilize your racing heart. Charles pulls the offending scrap off of you, tossing it somewhere to the corners of the bedroom, and you close your legs by instinct. He grabs your thighs and pulls them apart gently, his eyes never leaving yours, not until he’s settled comfortably between your thighs, arms wrapped around your hips, keeping your legs open. 
The scent of your arousal fills his senses and his eyes flutter shut as he brings his nose closer to the source, inhaling deeply, resting his cheek on your inner thigh. You bite back a whimper. His thumb rubs the spot a little above your clit, in a soothing motion. 
“I want your eyes on me, baby. I want you to watch how I worship you.”
This time you don't even try to hold back the whimper, gushing some more. 
It starts with a broad stripe up your folds, the sudden heat making you flinch and try to close your thighs, making him grip you tighter and move your feet to rest on his shoulders. Then, Charles uses his thumbs to separate the saturated folds, opening you up like a flower, holding the lips open as he licks once again, this time taking his time and tasting your nectar from the source, and ending his ascent up with a suck on your throbbing pearl. Your breath catches and your fingers curl into the bedsheets next to your hips. And then, your boyfriend commences the feast, eating you, drinking you up as if he’d been dehydrated for days. Your hips thrash against him, unable to decide if you wanted more or to get away from the assault on your pussy, back arching off the bed and deeper into his mouth, hands coming up to grip your pillow, teeth biting down uselessly on a finger, trying to keep sounds from escaping. Charles’ eyes never leave yours, watching what he does to you– that is until he runs his tongue over your clit and makes your eyes roll back. 
He pulls your hand away from your mouth. “I want to hear your sounds”, he says, and you’re not even sure if you can get wetter. Now uninhibited, you whimper and moan with every caress of his mouth. You gasp when you feel the tip of his tongue wriggle into your entrance. “Hands– Want to… want to hold your hand”, you whine as you reach down and make a grabby hand, and Charles intertwines his fingers with yours, smiling at your adorableness and pressing a kiss to the junction where your thigh met your labia. And then he goes back to business, smirking against you when he feels you squeeze his hand at his ministrations. 
Once he feels like he’s stretched you enough with his tongue, he pulls off. “Baby, I need to loosen you up to take me. I’m gonna add some fingers now ok? I need you to tell me if I hurt you.”
“Okay”, you pant. 
You feel one finger ease into you, and you flutter around the digit, trying to adjust to the foreign feeling. 
“Fuck. Are you alright?”
“Just a little uncomfortable. But… you can move.”
He pushes the finger deeper and then slowly works you open, feeling around your walls, trying to find your G-spot. Once you become accustomed to the feeling and feel the effects of the pleasure, you tell him to add another. With two fingers pumping into you now, Charles takes the chance to latch onto your clit again, and you let out a surprised shriek, which turns into a moan, the sensations building something deep in your gut. “Hnnng, baby– something’s– I can’t.” You’re no longer able to form coherent sentences. Charles increases his pace, feeling you get close, and your toes form points, the tips digging into his shoulder blades as your thighs, no longer held down, close around his head.
He pushes you over the edge and you cum, silently trembling, unable to make a sound, shocks traveling through your body as your boyfriend helps you through it. Your knuckles are white with how hard you’re gripping Charles’s hand, back bowing off the bed and head pressed as far back as possible, another hand gripping the pillowcase, eyes rolled back and fluttering as you shake.
Charles cleans up your juices, pressing a gentle kiss to your now sensitive clit, then making his way up to kiss your sweaty forehead. “Good girl”, he whispers as he licks his fingers clean. “You taste like a dream.”
Once you catch your breath, you smile shyly. “Thank you. I think I like your fingers now.”
Realization flashes through Charles’ face as he remembers your words to him in LA. He grins and tickles you, sending giggles throughout the room. 
When he stops, you pull him down closer to you. “Can we fuck now?”
“No”
Your expression falls. 
“We can’t fuck now, but I can make love to you.”
A sigh of relief. “Aren’t they the same thing?”
A huff of air against your collarbone. “Oh love, you’ll know the difference when I fuck you.”
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stuckinapril · 6 months
Note
Do you have any poetry recommendations? The poem poll made me realize that I like. ONLY know Iraqi poets. Like the only non-Iraqi poet I can name off the top of my head is Robert Frost
i'm literally hooked on poetry. even on days where i can't sit down to read a book, i try to consume at least one poem a day bc it keeps me sane. it actually does. i recommend signing up to one poem a day newsletters--those have been a game changer for me. as for recommendations, my favorite poems change every week, but current faves (whose authors i regularly go back to/are a good starting point) would be:
elegy for my sadness - chen chen (Who invented the word / “ennui”? A sad Frenchman? / A centipede? They should’ve never / been born. They should’ve seen me / in Paris, a sad teenage / exchange student. I was so sad / & so teenaged, one day my host sister / gripped my hand hard & even harder / said, SOIS HEUREUX. / BE HAPPY. & miraculously, / I wasn’t sad anymore. / All I felt was the desire to slap my host sister. / See, I was angry in Paris, which is clearly / not allowed. One can be sad in Paris (I was) / & one can be in love in Paris (I was not), / but angry? Angry in Paris?")
a pity, we were such a good invention - yehuda amichal ( "A pity / We were such a good / And loving invention / An aeroplane made from a man and wife / Wings and everything / We hovered a little above the earth")
like a small cafe, that's love - mahmoud darwish ("I say to myself at last / Perhaps she who I was waiting for / was waiting for me, or was waiting for some other man / or was waiting for us, and did not find him/me.")
bible study - tony hoagland ("Who knows, this might be the last good night of summer / My broken nose is forming an idea of what’s for supper / Hard to believe that death is just around the corner / What kind of idiot would think he even had a destiny?")
mother and child - louise gluck ("Why do I suffer? Why am I ignorant? / Cells in a great darkness. Some machine made us; / it is your turn to address it, to go back asking / what am I for? What am I for?")
america, america - saadi youssef ("We are not hostages, America, / and your soldiers are not God's soldiers... / We are the poor ones, ours is the earth of the drowned gods, / the gods of bulls, / the gods of fires, / the gods of sorrows that intertwine clay and blood in a song... / We are the poor, ours is the god of the poor, / who emerges out of farmers' ribs, / hungry / and bright, / and raises heads up high...")
the duino elegies (seventh elegy respectively) - rainer maria rilke ("Not only the devotion of these unfolded forces, / not only the paths, not only the evening fields, / not only, after a late storm, the breathing freshness, / not only approaching sleep and a premonition, evenings... / also the nights! Also the high summer nights / also the stars, the stars of this Earth! / O to be dead at last and know them eternally, / all the stars: for how, how, how to forget them!")
the endlessness - ada limon ("How was i supposed to feel then? About moving in the world? How could I touch anything or anyone without the weight of all of time shifting through us?")
psalm - adonis ("Open my memory and study my face beneath its words, learn my alphabet. When you see foam weaving my flesh and stone flowing in my blood, you will see me. I am closed like a tree trunk, present and ungraspable like air. Thus I cannot surrender to you.")
the war works hard - dunya mikhail ("The war continues working, / day and night. / It inspires tyrants / to deliver long speeches / awards medals to generals / and themes to poets / it contributes/ to the industry / of artificial limbs / provides food for flies / adds pages to the history books / achieves equality / between killer and killed / teaches lovers to write letters / accustoms young women to waiting / fills the newspapers / with articles and pictures / builds new houses / for the orphans / invigorates the coffin makers / gives grave diggers / a pat on the back / and paints a smile on the leader's face.")
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seenoversundown · 2 months
Text
For Death Or Glory : Chapter Thirteen
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Jake Kiszka x Charlotte (Fem OC)
Warnings: 18+ Smut (a small amount of masturbation) Alcohol / Drinking, Suggestive conversations, dicking around on the job, Mentions of Sexual preferences, Flirting, Fluff, terrible dad jokes, and unfortunate amounts of pirate comments.
Word Count: 4k
Summary: Jake is still reeling from the events of the night before, when Charlotte rolls up with a wonderful proposition that he could NEVER refuse. Leading them into a fun game that helps him get through the rest of the night.
Author's Note: THE GAMES HAVE BEGUN. They really are so precious and watching them learn how to interact with each other has me giggling and kicking my feet. (even though I'm quite literally in charge of them 💀) Can't wait to hear how you guys feel after this one!! 💕😍
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Bathroom Light - Mt Joy "So, come on, baby, let's do this right, I think I like falling in love in the bar bathroom light."
“I feel like we should talk.” 
Not my favorite thing she’s said to me, if we’re being honest. Charlotte’s leant against the doorframe to my office, her hands are busy playing with the dainty rings she has on. 
“Okay,” I say, “you can come all the way into the room though.” She scurried in, shutting the door quietly behind her. 
“I don’t know how to say this,” she starts, sounding timid, which is unusual for her. 
I can’t stop myself from speaking up, “Did I overstep?” 
“Oh my god, no. No, not at all,” she spits out. “I actually.. um.” She looks back down at her hands, a small grin grows on her face. 
My eyebrow pops up, waiting for her, “What?” Comes out with a slight laugh. 
“Maybe we could be friends who, like..” her face turning red as she whispers, “maybe hook up sometimes..” 
We’re friends? She wants to - with me? I- oh my god. 
“Oh,” I can hardly form words with the speed my brain is moving at, “Oh, uh, we can. Yes. I would be okay with that.” My eyes finally met hers, knowing full well that I probably look far too excited. 
“Really?” 
I watch her chew the inside of her lip and see her hands shake slightly, which honestly makes me feel a bit better. At least I'm not the only one who gets nervous. I reach out, grabbing one of her hands with both of mine, which gets her to look back at me. 
“Really,” I say quietly, “Whatever you're comfortable with.” Finally standing up from my desk, she just looks at me, and I can’t quite tell what's going on inside that pretty little head of hers. 
Suddenly her arms are wrapped around my neck in a hug, catching me off guard. I let my arms sit around her waist as she lets out the sweetest little laugh next to my ear. 
“You’re sure about this?” she asks, leaning back to look at me. I get to spend more time with her and possibly get laid once in a while? YEAH, I THINK I’M SURE. 
“You can be the Captain of this ship,” I tell her, choking back a laugh as hard as I can. 
She does not; she drops her head, leaning against me as she barks out a laugh. Her small frame just shook against me, but at least this time, it was happy. 
Still laughing, she looks back up at me, “You’re so dumb,” she manages to get out before leaning forward to press a sweet kiss on my lips. I could get used to that.  ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯
I didn’t anticipate the torture that I would endure after that conversation, having to be around her in the bar and stay normal about it. She already made me feel on edge, in a good way, before the last twenty-four hours, but now it’s ungodly how tense my body feels. 
I try to spend as much time cleaning and talking to the regulars that have come in, but I continuously find myself looking at her. I just want to talk to her. 
I pull out my phone, quickly type out a message, and slide it under the bar in front of me. 
Me: so.. does this mean I can just.. kiss you if we’re not around people?
My hands sweat at the thought, but god, what I’d give to kiss her again right now. I glance over as she picks her phone up, seeing the smirk creep onto her face. Looking around the bar to see if anybody might need something until my phone lights up. 
Charlotte: I'd like that. 🤭
Charlotte: You have a pretty mouth, so I think we should. 
Feeling warm at the compliment. A pretty mouth? I had been told on a multitude of occasions that I’m a bit more feminine, but given that my counterpart is Josh, who keeps his hair short and has facial hair, I don’t think I had much of a fighting chance. But I’ve never been complimented like that before, and I think I liked it.  
Me: play along 
I walk over to where she’s sitting, and her eyebrows pull in for a second looking at me. Sliding carefully behind Mel and Josh, I lean against the bar facing her. 
“Can you come with me? I need your opinion on if something is up to code,” I tell her, my voice at a normal volume but giving her a slow wink. 
“Oh, absolutely,” she replies, “Mel, I’ll be right back.” 
I meet her at the end of the bar, gesturing toward the hallway and leading her to our cooler. Once we’re out of sight, sticking my hand out behind me for her which she immediately grabs. We round the corner into the back room, and I turn to face her, pulling her into me. Tilting her chin up with my free hand, seeing her smile as I do. 
“Hi,” she mumbles, pressing a kiss against my lips. 
Letting out a small ‘mmm’ as my arms rest around her waist, “Let me just—“ Leaning in, noticing the way she doesn’t actually close her eyes. She just watches my mouth. Feeling her hands find their place on my stomach as I take her bottom lip between mine, making my heart shake. I wonder what makes her feel like this. Pulling my arms back slightly, letting my hands hold her waist, lightly squeezing her when I feel her hands grab my shirt. That must be something. 
“So, about that opinion,” I whisper into her, making her giggle. She reaches up, wiping the smudge of lipstick she left on me, and my stomach turns at how gentle she is.
Her eyes slowly look up, meeting my stare as she lets out a quiet, “I think that exceeds the standard, for sure.” 
We both hear footsteps in the hall; backing away from her quickly and folding my arms across my chest as she nods when Mel rounds the corner into the cooler.
“Jake, the POS is living up to its name.. Can you help?” she rolls her eyes, clearly frustrated. 
“Shit, yeah, I’ll be right there.” 
We both watch as Mel quickly turns, leaving the room looking fairly defeated. Standing there in silence for a matter of a few seconds before we both let out a quiet laugh. 
“I guess I need to do my job,” I whisper to her, making her smile. She turns to face me, fixing my shirt for me and moving a rogue hair back into place. Her hands linger on my chest as she looks at me, which only makes the butterflies in my stomach go wild. 
The smirk on her face is killing me when she says, “Go save them, boss man.” 
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The bar continued to get busier, making it harder and harder for me to not actually do my job. Almost as if flirting with pretty girls isn’t in my job description or something. Stealing little glances at her any chance I could while we quietly texted each other random things. 
Charlotte: You have to stop looking at me like that 
I grab the empty glasses from a table, walking back towards the bar but sneaking up behind her. 
“Like what?” I whisper next to her ear, setting the glasses on the bar top in front of her. Giggling as she jumps slightly, scowling at me, but that doesn’t stop my stare. It would be easier if she wasn’t gorgeous. My eyes fell between her lips and holding eye contact.  
“That,” she whispers back, “whatever that is.”  She leans into her hand while the other falls into her lap. 
“You don’t like it?” I ask, forcing myself to stay focused on her eyes. Leaning onto the bar next to her, letting my hand hang over the edge. 
She smiled softly, “No, it’s terrible,” oozing with sarcasm fell from her lips, feeling her hand graze mine. 
My head tilts slightly as my eyebrows raise, “and why is that, honey?” I whisper, pulling my bottom lip in with my teeth, watching as her face flushes. 
Forcing myself to back up, grabbing the glasses as I go, what I wouldn't give to just spend the night with her instead? 
Me: do you like being called honey? 
I set my phone under the bar, pouring a few drinks for the regulars sitting there, trying not to look over at her, but it’s impossible. Glancing out of the corner of my eye, I see her pulling up her phone. What if she hates it? 
Charlotte: Mmmm I might 🤭
I'll never be sure what possessed me to call her that the first time. I've always just used ‘sweetheart’ or ‘dear’ because they feel safe and really can’t be taken too out of context. Also, to be entirely honest, I typically don’t get far enough with a girl to give her a cuter pet name than those.  It just sort of came out when I saw her start to melt down, and it’s stuck. 
Charlotte: Do you like that I use your full name? 
Her sweet voice calling me ‘Jacob’ plays in my head on a loop, so it’s safe to say I don’t mind it. Although, the way she called me ‘baby’ made me want to crawl out of my skin. She had me wrapped around her finger in that moment.  
Me: you can call me whatever your heart desires 
I looked over at her, saw her smile at the response, and quickly started to type. This game of twenty questions is definitely making tonight go by a little faster. 
Charlotte: That doesn’t really roll off the tongue nicely- I think I’ll stick with calling you by name or baby 😉
I audibly laugh at her text, unprepared for her to get me with a classic dad joke. It was almost enough to distract me from the last part, but no such luck as my heart fluttered at the pet name. I could go for hearing that a little more often. Wandering over towards her, I lean down as I grab the glass from in front of her and whisper, “You’re more than welcome to slip a ‘Captain’ in the mix as well, yknow?” 
She leans into her hand, propped up on the bar, “So, you do like that, huh?” 
“Felt a little different coming out of you,” I tell her, shrugging as I back up a little and biting the inside of my lip as she watches me. 
Her eyes rake down me before letting out a quiet, “I’ll keep that in mind.”
I help Josh for a few minutes, pouring a handful of drinks for some regulars and running to grab orders from a few of the new tables that just came in. Rounding back behind the bar, I slide my phone out of my pocket quickly. 
Me: since we’re doing this- do you have questions or shall I continue 
Tossing my phone under the bar, turning to wash a handful of glasses for them. I try to just focus on what I’m doing. But I just want to pay attention to her. I turn around as I’m drying and putting away the glasses, doing my best to scan the room for anybody who may need anything. My eyes fixate on her as she sets her phone down and looks over at me. I pick up my pace drying, sliding the glasses onto their shelf quickly so I can grab my phone, needing to know what she said. 
Charlotte: I’m assuming you’re a physical touch person? 
Me: you would be correct but I’d like to say I can cover all the bases if you like something else more. 
I’ve always been a touch person, especially given that I’ve spent my whole life with Josh. He can’t go two seconds without grabbing your arm if he’s telling you something. So, it’s definitely something I’d developed over time and also suffered from; the lack of physical touch I’ve had in the last couple of years is contributing to the urge to ask her every two minutes to meet me somewhere hidden. Even though I would do whatever she prefers, I just hope she enjoys physical touch because I don’t know how I’m supposed to avoid it. 
Charlotte: Oh, touch is near the top with words of affirmation for me, so I think you’re doing just fine 
Knowing she likes words of affirmation makes my stomach knot up, the amount of things I’ve held back because I don’t want to overwhelm her. But I’ll tell her that she’s the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen every day if she’ll let me. Despite the fact she was just being open, I decided to test the waters on this situation we’ve put ourselves in. 
Me: soo.. does that mean you like to be..reassured or no?
Hitting send, I immediately feel like I’m sweating. I pour a few beers waiting for her reply, hoping that she knows what I meant and that she doesn’t take back everything she said in my office today. 
Charlotte: A little praise never hurt anybody.
I whip my head over to her, and my hand wipes over my mouth as she smiles at me. The fact I’m blushing over the answer to the question I asked feels ridiculous. Why did I think this was a good idea? Making eye contact with someone at the bar who wants to order, I walk over to them. Taking their order and turning to grab all the bottles needed for it, I slide my phone from my pocket, setting it on the counter as she texts me again.  
Charlotte: Do you always like to be the Captain? Or do you like to let others assist? 
My eyes shut while I take a deeper breath; why is she doing this to me? Forcing myself to focus on mixing their drink, but my brain feels like it’s short-circuiting. She did have a little dominant streak in her yesterday. I grab a napkin and bring the drink back over to them, nodding as they thank me. 
‘All for me, baby?’ plays in my head, and I guess I had never thought about preferences like that before. Most girls I had been with at this point wanted nothing to do with being in control. I also was typically not the most sober in these instances, so it’s debatable how dominant I even was. They just wanted me to do the work, which in the grand scheme, was fine. 
The way that she wants to have control makes my body tingle. Something about the idea of her telling me what she wants me to do is kind of hot. She basically had me begging for her yesterday, so maybe I’m a bit more submissive than I thought. I get head one time, and I’m reflecting on my entire sex life. Jesus Christ, chill out. 
Me: I’ll gladly let you steer anyday, don’t have to ask twice 
I wipe down the back counter, reorganizing a bit, anything to keep my brain from spiraling out of control over her. I wash some glasses in painfully hot water in hopes that it’ll prevent anything uncomfortable from happening to me while I’m just trying to get through this shift with her. 
After a few minutes of torture, I pick up my phone again. 
Charlotte: In that case, meet me in the bathroom? 
I’ve never replied faster.
Me: 🫡  ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯
“Couldn’t wait any longer?” Winking at her as I lock the door behind me. 
Her smile is devious as she runs her hands up my chest, “When you look like this? Not at all.” Tugging me closer by my shirt, tilting her head back as I lean in to kiss her. 
All I can think is how lucky I am that I’m in this weird little situation with her. The fact that she’s communicating things to me, even if we’re doing it in a kind of vague way, makes me feel a little more confident with anything that’s potentially going to happen. 
Pulling away from the kiss for a second, I gently move some hair away from her face, just taking her in. My other hand is holding her lower back, keeping her close. The way she’s looking at me makes my heart pound. 
“Can I ask you something while we're here?” I mumble, watching her eyebrows pull together. 
“Obviously.” 
“I just want to hear your response to this one,” I start. “Can you promise me that if I say or do something that you don’t like, you’ll tell me?” 
Her eyes softened at the question. Her hands grabbed the sides of my face as she pressed a soft peck against my lips.
“Of course, I will. Promise.” 
“I never want to make you uncomfortable,” I mumble against her, “okay?” 
Her soft laugh against my lips before pressing a few sweet kisses into me, I swear this girl could get me to fold so easily. 
“You really are something, Jacob.” 
My stomach flips as the sentence leaves her lips. My heartbeat felt stronger than before, and my mouth basically ran dry; what is she doing to me? The look in her eyes as we stared at each other in the subtle glow of the light, even after the past few days, I’d be lying if I said she didn’t still make me nervous. Every kiss makes it feel like there are fireworks in my chest and a ton of excited butterflies in my stomach; my entire body gets warm, and I have to fight the slight tremor in my hands, so she doesn’t know. But god, this girl has me stumbling over myself every day.
“What if we just stay in here for the rest of the night?” I whisper into her.
Her hands slid down onto my stomach, “I think they might notice we’ve disappeared.” 
“Unfortunate, innit?” the English accent sneaking out of me, making her laugh. If that’s all it takes, I’ll use it more. “Why don’t you go back out there first? I’ll go to the backroom first, so it’s more convincing.” 
“Sounds like a plan, Captain,” she winks as she pats my stomach and then quickly sneaks out the door. Leaving me there, speechless, staring at the door for a moment. I think I just tripped.
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I hid in the backroom for a few minutes, bringing out a handful of things to restock with. I try to wipe the smile off my face when I can feel her eyes on me. I have Mel run to the tables and get some drink orders taken care of; she’s been trapped behind the bar all night, at least get her a few minutes of a new scenery. 
It feels nice to make drinks mindlessly for customers sometimes. The muscle memory starts to kick in, and I can just go for a while. It’s just a bonus having Charlotte sitting at the end of the bar, intently watching every move I make.
“Aren’t you supposed to be watching Melody?” I tease, sliding a drink to her. 
Her hands rake through her curls, softly laughing as she says, “Well, she isn’t making drinks right now, is she?” 
“So you’re making sure I know what I’m doing then?”
“Something like that,” she says, biting her lip subtly. The goosebumps erupt on my arms instantly when she does that. 
Folding my arms across my chest, I look at her to ask, “Anything notable?” 
She slides her paper out for a second, quickly tucking it away so I can’t see what she’s written down. Sneaky little thing.
“You seem good.. with your hands,” she tilts her head slightly, slowly blinking at me. I can’t stop myself from smirking at the comment. I had noticed before that she watched my hands, but nothing was more validating than that comment. 
I step closer to the bar, leaning towards her a little so I can whisper, “Guess you’ll have to find out.” I watch her jaw slack at my comment, chuckling to myself. Seeing her flustered makes me feel less insane for being so antsy all night. The way she shifts in her seat as I look at her, I don’t think someone has ever reacted to my stare like this before. 
We spend the rest of Mel’s shift making unbearably tense eye contact, which makes me want to get her alone even more. She stayed for a little longer after Melody left, but I practically begged her to get home before it was too late. Something about the thought of her trying to drive in the Old Port when all the late-night bargoers are out just makes me nervous. 
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After what has seemingly become our nightly routine of walking her to her car, with the new bonus of getting to kiss her before she leaves, I’m met with an empty apartment. 
She won’t be home for a little bit. I pull open the fridge staring mindlessly, realizing that I’m not even really hungry. Taking the opportunity since Josh isn’t home, I wander into the bathroom, starting the shower. 
I stood under the hot water, letting it beat against me for a moment. My brain runs rampant with thoughts of her, still unable to process that she’s giving me any time, let alone wanting to spend more time with me. 
My eyes close as I think of the way she touches me; her hands are so delicate, and she’s so careful. Her hands always find a spot on my chest or stomach when she kisses me. Grabbing fistfuls of my shirt when we make out. Her lips though— those are something to write home about. God, I really was touch starved. 
My heart flutters at the thought of her kiss and how good it felt with her. Even when she was just leaving tiny pecks down my neck, I swear I could get goosebumps just from the memory. It had been so long since I even had the option I forgot how exciting it was. 
The thought of her sitting on my lap, her hands tangled into my hair, god. I feel the twitch, trying to ignore it. No, don’t be weird, Jake. Just think about something else. Rinsing the shampoo out of my hair and trying to refocus, but all I can hear in my head is, “all for me, baby?” A small groan comes from me, and I can’t stop myself from sliding my cock through my fist to relieve some of the tension. 
Her lips wrapped around me, the way she seemed like she was enjoying it, and her little moans as she slid me as deep into her mouth as she could. 
“Fuck,” I mutter, stroking myself a little faster. The visual of her on her knees for me has me reaching out to hold myself up. How is she real?
My hips jerked forward as I heard her voice in my head saying, “Come on, Captain.” 
Another moan sneaks out, my eyes fixed shut at this point, wishing she were here. God, she was so good. The way she swirled her tongue around me, her hair wrapped around my fist. Her green eyes look up at me as she takes just about all of me into her mouth, holy shit, I’m–.
“Fuck me, Charlotte,” I quietly groan as my orgasm washes over me. The water is hardly even warm at this point, while I frantically clean myself off to avoid a cold shower— that’s five minutes too late. 
Tapping my phone as I’m drying myself off. One Missed Call. Unlocking it instantly, seeing her name sitting there, I call her back with no hesitation. Is she okay? She hasn’t called me until she’s home before. 
“Hiii,” her soft voice dances around in my ear. 
“Hey, are you okay?” I spit out, knowing I probably sound insane. 
“Oh! Yes, everything’s fine! I'm just still driving,” she replies; a sigh of relief escapes me, grateful that she’s okay. Until all my nerves come flooding back when she says, “I just wanted to hear your voice.” 
⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Fourteen
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yuurivoice · 28 days
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since you love to write, does your job ever feel like actual work? Kinda like that saying “if you love your job, you’ll never work a day of your life.” Kinda question.
also, how much free time do you normally have?
It felt like actual work from pretty early on. The moment I crossed over from doing it for funsies to sometimes taking commissions I didn't really feel strongly about for money, it was work.
I've had to drag my ass into the booth and record on days when I couldn't even take care of my basic needs because of ADHD struggles, and that sure felt like work.
I've had to write like absolute dogshit and just accept it because I had deadlines and people waiting on me. That felt like work.
I've had to spend hours breaking down different shots needed for visual projects, like a caveman painting on a wall for a renaissance artist to reference. That definitely felt like work.
I've had to deal with community moderation, personal betrayals of trust, harassment, goddamn pr crises, tax nightmares, and shipping hundreds of orders by hand. That was work.
That old cliche of if you love what you do, you'll never work a day in your life is a crock of shit. But all of that being said, even though it is work, and even though it can be really difficult sometimes?
Wouldn't trade it for the world. There is no other calling for me, my heart is not satisfied if I am not telling stories, and for some reason the universe decided that this was the path forward. I didn't plan on it. I never loved voice acting, but I learned to. I wish there was less bullshit over the years that robbed me of my joy. I wish I wasn't fighting my brain for so much of the time I've been doing this.
But the good will always outweigh the bad.
It's a dream fulfilled. I never needed or wanted to be some sort of massive sensation, or have broad renown or appeal. I didn't need to become a best selling author, or create a hit video game, or do anything like that. I am happy that I've found even a small group of people who love to get lost in my worlds, or spend time with my characters, or hear them get railed in pumpkin patches.
I get to experience the magic of creating something I didn't know was within me. Again and again. Projects like BitterSweet, Shattered, and Echoes of Evalas are precious to me because of the wondrous feeling creating those stories gives me. They could all flop, and I'd do it anyway.
I was creating art when no one was ever there to listen or watch. In that regard, it's never been work. It is a function of my existence. I was made, raised, and shaped to tell stories. It's the one thing I can do. At a table of friends, an audience of hundreds, or on long drives by myself. It's like breathing. It just happens.
Being able to call it work is a privilege. I'm thrilled that I've got the chance to work. I'm happy that I even have the opportunity to have days where I have to push myself. Because it has given me more than I've ever thought it could. I was on food stamps living with family under constant threat of getting kicked out. I was lonely, isolated, and scared of the world. I was considered lazy.
Finding my lane, getting traction, and thriving was something I considered out of reach. I was ready to tap out and accept that I just wasn't quite right for life. Like maybe I just didn't have all the right parts. I was okay with it, even. I was tired.
So yeah. It's work. But I spent a long time desperate to find work I was suited for, and with a lot of recent life changes I've removed many of those points of friction that would make it tough to work. So I'm thrilled.
And that, my friends, is what happens when you ask a professional yapper if they love yapping. 😂
As for free time, it's hard to say. So much of what I do being my own boss and shit, plus creative stuff just constantly churning in my brain, I struggle to clearly define what is and is not "free time". I basically have to be on call. At any given moment something might need my attention, or creativity comes knocking. It's hard to completely disconnect.
I've done a good job of getting into the office about four times a week. That has helped me find some sort of balance, but even recent writing I've done was on my laptop at my little breakfast nook having coffee.
I think the big thing is, I can create my free time whenever I need or want to.
Anywho, this is why you don't open Tumblr when you wake up to pee in the middle of the night because then you spent 30 minutes staring at your phone writing a whole ass essay. I'm gonna go get out of bed and make something awesome now. 💖
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taeyongdoyoung · 10 months
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summary: you're tired of your relatives asking you if you're still single every Christmas. on the spur of the moment, you lie that your have boyfriend. luckily, your best friend sweeps in like your knight in shining armor to save the day pairing: jin x reader genre: romcom with a lil angst, best friends to fake dating to lovers warnings: nosy annoying relatives, lying, fake dating trope, one bed mentioned, some crying, insecurities, confessions, kissing, it is quite mild tbh author's note: the title is super lame but hey, Jin likes dad jokes so here we go 🤷 also i intended to post this for his bday but didn't have enough time to finish it word count: 2.4k
Christmas is the loneliest time of the year for you. Even though you spend it with your relatives, they always make a point of asking whether you are still single. Spoiler alert: you are. It's gotten annoying that they don't appreciate you for your academic and personal achievements and they are only interested in your relationship status. You are so tired of the recurring question which is why you dread Christmas so much. A few weeks before it, you get a call from your parents.
"You're coming home for the holidays, right?"
"Of course, mom," you respond, rolling your eyes.
"So…have you found a special someone?"
There it is. Again. Ugh.
"If I hear this one more time…" you sigh.
"Got it," your mom chuckles condescendingly, which frustrates you to no end.
You don't know what spirit possesses you to do what you do next but the words are out of your mouth before you can think twice about it.
"I actually have a boyfriend but maybe if you weren't nagging me about it every Christmas, I would have told you earlier."
"You do?" your mom exclaims, surprise evident in her voice."Well, isn't that wonderful! You should bring him, introduce him into the family."
"He's really busy, mom, I don't think he'll make it," you keep lying, trying to get out of the situation you'd brought upon yourself.
"Nonsense, no one works on Christmas. I expect to see the happy couple soon. And no excuses!"
Before you could argue, your mom hangs up. Great. Now you have two weeks to magically find a boyfriend to bring home for the holidays.
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You are sitting on your best friend's couch, playing games with him.
"Damn, you're so good at this!" you shout in fake annoyance at being defeated but you are actually happy for him. You know how much Jin loves winning.
"What can I say? I was born this way," he smirks confidently and puts the console on the table.
"Humble, as always," you tease him, nudging his shoulder.
"So, do you have any plans for Christmas?"
"Ugh, don't remind me."
"Why? I thought you loved Christmas movies and decorations and all things Christmas-related," Jin tells you and you are beyond touched to have someone who knows you that well and remembers such details.
"I do, but…I got myself in a bit of a predicament."
"Do share," he turns to the side so that he can face you.
"Well, you know how my relatives always ask whether I'm still single? And they're especially persistent around the holidays."
"I know," he laughs. "You've only complained about it like a hundred times."
"Sorry," you grimace at your own predisposition to torment your best friend everytime something goes wrong in your life. "So, um…this year I told my mom I have a boyfriend."
"And I learn about this now?" Jin puts a hand on his heart, expressing disappointment that you'd kept such a big secret from him.
"What? No, I don't have a boyfriend. I lied to my mom and now she expects me to bring a guy to meet the family."
"Oh, shit," he now understands why you're not looking forward to Christmas.
"Yep. I'm such a mess. Everyone will be so mad at me when I come home alone. Again. Kill me now."
"Well…you don't have to be alone."
"Huh?"
"Hear me out. What if I pretend to be your boyfriend? Just for the holidays. Then, your relatives would get off your back."
"Jin…I can't ask this of you."
"Good thing you're not asking. I came up with this brilliant idea myself. If it bothers you, you can tell them we broke up some time next year. Don't you want one Christmas of your relatives not repeating the same old annoying question?"
"I do want it, more than anything. But I would hate to inconvenience you…"
"Come on, it will be fun! My parents are spending this Christmas in Australia, drinking cocktails and soaking in the sun. It's not like I have anything special planned. It would be delightful to spend it with my best friend," Jin keeps talking and you are almost convinced.
"What about your best friend's super messy family?" you try to change his mind.
"Oh, I'm sure I'll charm the pants off them."
You are not worried about how your relatives will immediatelly fall in love with Jin. You are concerned that it will be you being charmed…
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You are revising every small detail while Jin is driving his car to your grandparents' place.
"When did we start dating?" you ask him.
"Three months ago. We naturally realized that we are great friends and would make an even greater couple," he responds without hesitation. "How did I ask you out?"
"You told me I am the best thing that happened to you and I would make you the happiest man in the world if I went on a date with you," you reply naturally. "What was our first date like?"
"We went to watch a movie together, after that we had dinner at a lovely restaurant and I walked you to your apartment where I kissed you in front of the doorstep."
"The roses! You forgot to mention the roses!" you cry out, almost panicking. This has to be perfect or your snoopy relatives might suspect something.
"I was supposed to bring roses to your grandparents? I thought the wine would be enough," Jin mumbles in confusion.
"No, for the first date details! We agreed that you'd mention the roses. What if…what if they ask and we mess something up and…"
"Darling, relax. We've got this. We've been best friends for seven years. We know each other well enough to handle anything."
You try to ignore the way your heart flutters when he calls you darling. Damnit. When he'd suggested pretending, you hadn't thought about the fact that it wouldn't be pretending on your part.
"Do you trust me?" Jin asks.
"Unequivocally," you assure him. It is yourself you don't trust.
Once he parks the car, you are immediately greeted by a bunch of your relatives.
"Come, come! It is lovely to meet you," your mom welcomes Jin.
"Mom, this is my best friend," you say by force of habit and then correct yourself, "and now my boyfriend, Jin."
"Nice to meet you, ma'am," Jin shakes her hand politely.
"Pfft, call me by my name," your mom says and introduces herself.
Quickly enough, your poor bestie is hounded by your grandparents, your aunt, your cousin and her kids. It's a lot of excitement considering you'd just arrived and you are already looking forward to going to bed. You love your relatives but sometimes they can be…a lot.
Jin, however, seems to be thriving. He talks to your mom about cooking, to your grandparents about fishing and politics, to your aunt and cousin about acting and singing. Even the kids seem to love him, as he takes the time to play hide and seek with them. He also promises to build a snowman with them when it is warmer tomorrow. You have no reason to worry and yet, seeing him naturally fit in with them on their first meeting…when you have felt like an outsider your whole life, is enough to bring tears to your eyes. You excuse yourself from the table, saying you need to use the bathroom.
Not expecting anyone to notice your absence, you cry quietly in your room, feeling as if you have never been good enough and your relatives were always disappointed in you. You hear a soft knock on the door, which takes you by surprise.
"You alright, love?" Jin asks.
You let him in and he wraps you up in one of his warm hugs that have the magical ability to make you stop crying.
"What's wrong? I thought it was going well," he whispers, not wanting anyone to overhear.
"It's going splendidly," you agree. "It's just that…they love you more than they do me."
"That can't be true, you're the most precious granddaughter, niece and cousin anyone could possibly have."
You sniffle and look up at him.
"You only say that 'cause I'm your best friend," you try to make light out of the situation.
"Girlfriend," he corrects you with a wink.
"Right," you chuckle through the tears.
"Come on. Let's not give them the opportunity to discuss us behind our backs," Jin jokes and you decide to return to the table. He gives you the strength needed to face them again.
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The Christmas holidays go by smoothly and in the blink of an eye. The days are filled with laughter, hot chocolate, yummy meals, wholesome Christmas movies, cozy socks and snowball fights with your cousin's kids. This might be the best Christmas you've ever had. You wonder if it's Jin's presence that made it so special and heartwarming. During the family dinners, he is the life of the party, always knowing the right thing to say to each and every one of your relatives. And when the two of you are alone, cuddled up in your room, he is your rock. You know you can count on him and tell him everything that has bothered you. And you know that he would understand you and comfort you like nobody else could.
Which is why it hurts so much when he is now driving you both back to the city. The pretense is over. You would no longer have an excuse to hold his hand or sleep in the same bed as him or kiss his cheek so openly. He is back to being your best friend. And perhaps that's the way it should be. You couldn't risk your friendship by doing something stupid like confessing your undying love for him. No, that would certainly be a terrible idea. Perhaps more terrible than having him as a fake boyfriend for the holidays.
"What's on your mind?" Jin asks.
"Hm?"
"I can see the gears turning in your head. Something is bothering you."
"Hey, aren't you supposed to look at the road instead of the gears in my head?" you tease him.
"I can multitask. Come on, just tell me."
"It's nothing. I just found myself wishing the Christmas holidays could last longer. I really had an amazing time, which doesn't usually happen around my relatives."
"Glad I could be of service," Jin smirks proudly, making you laugh. You would never grow tired of his casually confident nature.
Silence ensues for a couple of minutes and you are back to worrying and thinking about your unresolved feelings for your best friend. When suddenly, he interrupts your thought process with an unexpected suggestion.
"How about we have a second Christmas?"
"A second Christmas?" you repeat in confusion.
"My place. Just the two of us. We'll do all the things we didn't have the chance to do at your grandparents' house."
"Such as?" you inquire, wondering what you've missed.
"We'll play games and I'll make you my famous roast beef. We'll have midnight snacks and watch anime with no one judging us. We'll bake Christmas cookies together and we could even go ice-skating."
"That…sounds lovely. I'm in," you immediately agree, excited to have a second Christmas with Jin. Maybe, just maybe, a miracle will happen.
The next day, you arrive at his place and are amazed to find how magically decorated it is.
"Ta-da! Welcome to your own personal winter wonderland."
"My goodness, Jin, it looks incredible! How did you achieve all this so quickly and all by yourself? You must be exhausted."
"Nah, it was my pleasure. And besides, seeing the smile on your face is the best Christmas present I could hope for," he responds.
"Merry second Christmas to you, too," you grin and give him a hug. It feels so natural and like you were meant to end up right there.
As promised, the two of you get to do all the things you couldn't at your grandparents'. You watch the spiciest animes with zero shame, you eat ramen at 1am and you play violent games that would make your relatives gasp in horror. It is genuinely the most incredible Christmas. Even more incredible than the time you spent with your family.
But all good things inevitably come to an end. Tomorrow, it is time for both you and Jin to go back to work. And with that, the magical holidays will be over. You don't want them to be. You wish you could stay in this bubble forever, with Jin's arms wrapped around you.
"I should probably head home. You have to wake up early tomorrow."
"Or…you could stay. We can share the bed," Jin suggests and you can swear you hear a hopeful hint in his voice.
"Jin…we're no longer surrounded by my nosy relatives. You don't have to pretend it's okay with you to have me intruding on your personal space."
"Who said I was pretending?" he whispers and you probably shouldn't but you allow yourself to dream. There is no way he feels the same…or is there?
"Don't…don't say stuff like that if you don't mean it," you mumble, feeling more vulnerable than ever.
"I'm tired of hiding it, sweetheart," he sighs and presses his hand against your cheek. "I only offered the whole fake dating thing because I was hoping you would finally get the hint and realize how important you are to me. But in case it wasn't obvious enough, let me spell it out for you. I. Am. Crazy. About. You."
You blink in shock.
"Pinch me so I know I'm not dreaming. You…like me back?"
"How about I do something better?" Jin smiles softly and leans in to kiss you. It is slow and sweet, just as how you'd imagined it hundreds of times. No, scratch that. It is so much better. He makes you feel so special and loved. You wish you had confessed earlier. You have been missing out on so many Christmas kisses.
"Look up," Jin says gently once he finally breaks the kiss.
You do as he asks and you realize that you have somehow ended up under a mistletoe decoration he must have put up and you haven't noticed before.
"Aww, man, did you only kiss me because of that mistletoe?"
"Let me take you to my room and prove you otherwise," Jin vows, grabs your hand and urges you to follow his lead.
Christmas is truly the most wonderful time of the year.
The End
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zozo-01 · 5 months
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"you’ve learned a long time ago to stop thinking things would change. (it didn't stop you from hoping anyways.)"
So, it's that time of year again, and I don't have the Raptors to distract me. It's the NHL playoffs and I am a Leafs fan. If you know, you know. I wrote this a year ago for myself and @thatlesbeanjew because being a hockey fan is not the faint of heart, and I completely forgot to post it to Tumblr ;-;. The title is from Jason's Spezza's retirement article and I think it applies well here.
For my sports (specifically hockey) fans who're in an toxic relationship with your favourite team, here's some southern comfort for you.
CW: author is being sentimental about grown men playing a game, i wrote this with the last years Bruins' collapse in mind (sorry tay), but no team is mentioned!!, city wolf darlin makes a comeback, Fluff, Comfort, so much comfort, someone send me to therapy
--
There’s never an easy way to say goodbye.
No one wants to say goodbye, and even if it has to be said, let it be said with finality, with a sense of accomplishment. That even if this is the end, the journey was enjoyable. That the blood, sweat, tears (and really dumb questions) were worth it. That the years, your childhood, spent hoping were worth it.
No one wants to end on a whimper, especially if it’s broadcasted on national TV.
They still can’t believe that final goal went in.
Darlin’ stared at the TV, watching the series-winning goal over and over again. Their eyes tried to rewrite history, using what magic they have to will the puck to not cross the red line. Go wide right, hit the post, or even knock a player's teeth out for all they care! All their efforts were for naught. The goal still goes in, the building goes silent save for the cheers from the opposing team, and the season was over.
It was hard to believe that just a moment ago, their body was buzzing with anxiety, every sensation was cranked up to an eleven. Only for all that excitement collapsing inside their body, creating a black hole within their heart, numbing them to the result of the game in front of them.
All of that emotional investment just to get the same result. They felt silly for letting themselves dream, believe, with nothing to prove their faith. Everyone around them had been right, but they insisted on their foolish delusion, stubborn to the very end for this hockey team that has brought them nothing but pain.
Darlin’ had always preferred the painful route, embodying the sentiment that ‘love is pain’. It just so happened that it applied to more than the people in their life.
Their legs lost all their strength, causing them to fall backwards onto the couch. Their eyes stayed glued to the screen, ears ringing louder than any goal horn they’d heard in their life. Part of them wished they had never decided to care for this stupid team that only does stupid things and makes them cheer like a stupid idiot.
Ok, maybe this seems like an exaggerated reaction to a hockey team losing a game, but truly, this is how Darlin’ felt at this moment.
And Sam knew it.
They barely registered the soft blanket wrapping around their shoulders, but the warmth helped ground them a little bit. Sam always knew how to bring them out of their daze, with gentle pressure and plenty of space. Always giving them the choice of when to ask for help, a choice they’ve found themselves making more often.
They heard the faint clink of a plate on the coffee table in front of them. But what had knocked them out of their trance was Sam finally turning off the damn TV. It didn’t stop the goal horn from ringing in their ears, but at least they didn’t have to see that fucking rat’s shit-eating grin again. Who the fuck does he think he is? Fuck that guy, fuck that team, fuck everything-
They blinked repeatedly, feeling Sam’s hand playing with their hair. “I can feel your rage from here,” he chuckled. “Can’t imagine what you’re plannin’ to do to the other team in that pretty brain of yours.” Slowly, he shifted his arm to wrap around their shoulder to pull them closer to his chest. The tension that built up in their forehead had finally gone away when they heard his heartbeat. “Knowin’ you, you’re plannin’ something nefarious.”
“...I know where they’re stayin’,” they mumbled, nuzzling their face deeper into Sam’s chest. “That’s all I’ll say about that.”
He kissed their hair line and pulled them closer. “For the record, I will not be an accessory to your murderous rampage.” The small smile on their face prompted him to continue. “But I promise I won’t tell no one about your little scheme.” Leave it to Sam to make them smile when all they want to do is curl under a blanket and bleach the game from their mind.
They huffed in his chest. “I appreciate you not snitchin’ on me, but come on? You ain’t gonna help your mate with the body? Fake ass bitch.” Darlin’ let out a quiet giggle. Seeing the southern man deadpan at them is a surefire way to make them smile.
He pinched their nose and scoffed, “forgive me if I don’t want to see my mate in jail because a hockey team decided to beat your team.”
They pout at his statement, not appreciating the blunt tone he used. Come to think of it, when he puts it like that, their reaction to the ending of this game seems ridiculous. Wanting to kill grown men for doing their job? Because they just happen to beat their team? They’re a grown adult damn it! They’re better than being emotional over a team!
Sam flicked their forehead, knocking them out of their spiral. He pulled his wolf closer to him, letting their head rest on his shoulder. “No self-deprecatin’ spiral for you, Darlin’. You’re allowed to feel shitty over a game.” He continued to pet their hair, content with sitting in silence until they were ready to speak.
Darlin’ kissed his cheek and sighed. “I know, I know, I’m valid with my feelins’, it’s just…” They trailed off, biting their bottom lip while trying to articulate their thoughts into words. If only incoherent screaming was enough for Sam to understand their emotions. “When I say this team has sucked for my entire life… there hasn’t been a year where shit has gone right for us.”
Their vision blurred as they continued. “And I’m so fuckin’ tired of- of having hope that things will end different and then they never do!” The more words that poured out of them, the more anger bled into their voice. “It’s like, come on! They’ve had decades and so many different fuckin’ players and management to get their shit together and they never do! How much longer do they think people are gonna blindly follow them until…” A sob crept up their throat. “...Until we all decide to just… not care.”
They sighed in frustration. “I know it’s so stupid to fuckin’ care about a stupid team this much… I don’t know… They were the only good thing from my childhood.” Darlin’ chuckled at their last statement. “God, how has mt life been if this fuckin’ team was the best part?”
He rubbed their arm to comfort them. “Well on the bright side, it led you to my arms, so could it have been that bad?” Darlin’ pinched his chest, but that only caused their vampire to laugh harder. “Am I wrong, Darlin’? You seem to be enjoyin’ my arms a little too much,” he teased, acting as if it was a complaint against them. They both knew that Sam would rather die again than see his wolf in another person’s arms.
He held their face in his hands. Sam knew every little habit and quirk that Darlin’ had, and he knew that they wouldn’t look him in the eyes whenever they got emotional like this. “Darlin’, I need you to look at me please.”
They did as he asked them to, lifting their gaze and getting lost in his silver eyes. He kissed their forehead, whispering a soft ‘thank you’ against their skin. They don’t know if he’ll ever understand how fucking terrifying it was to have someone know them so well. But they wouldn’t trade that blissful feeling for anything else.
“It’s not stupid to care about this team, Darlin’. They were a huge part of your best memories as a kid. And maybe you will get tired of them one day and it will suck. But there’s no shame in lovin’ unconditionally.”
Darlin’s vision blurred again and cleared their throat to stop themselves from sobbing. “Even if they hurt me over and over again?”
Sam smirked, “well if they hurt you again, I’ll have to pay a visit down to their office and make sure they win.” Darlin’ scoffed at his cockiness but didn’t stop him from continuing. “‘Sides, like you always say.”
“Oh God, don’t say it-”
“There’s always next year.”
“I’m gonna fuckin’ kill you.”
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Anonymous asked: I find myself in a terrible rut where I want to read things from my favorite writers, but I compare myself too them and get discouraged feeling like my work will never be that good. I know comparison is a thief of joy, and people say they enjoy my writing, but I can't seem to get out of my own way. My other question is how to take a step back and remember we're doing this because we enjoy writing?
[Ask edited for length]
It can help to bear in mind that all writers--even your favorite ones--felt the same way at some point, and some of them still do. There are successful, famous, best-selling, award-winning authors who still get imposter syndrome. So, on some level, that's just brains doing brain things.
Also, though, it can help to know it's actually a good sign when you feel like your writing isn't quite where you want it to be. It means your taste... to quote Ira Glass (see video below), "the thing that got you into the game, your taste is still killer. And your taste is good enough that you can tell that what you're making is kind of a disappointment to you..." And that matters, because it means your brain knows what's good, even if you haven't quite gotten your writing skill there yet. But knowing... to quote something else... "is half the battle." If you know your writing could be better, you have the ability to get it there and you will.
So, read the post linked below and watch the video:
Comparing Self to Others, Insecure About Writing
And here's another post that might help:
Guide: Dealing with Self-Doubt & Impostor Syndrome
Ultimately, you get back to the joy of writing (and reading) by remembering that writing isn't something you instantly do well. Good writing takes time and practice, and you get better with every book you read and every story you write. So, keep loving what you're doing, because it's getting better and better with time, and there will come a time where you feel more confident in your writing and struggle less with comparing your writing to others. ♥
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I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!
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silvyadrakkon · 2 months
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3 Under-Discussed Writer’s Block Busters
You all know me as an artist, but my first love will always be writing. And writer’s block is REAL. 
So I thought I’d throw out a few of my moderately unusual writer’s block busters to help my fellow authors.
Of course, the most common “answers” to writer’s block are:
Just keep writing, even if you don’t want to. (Something is better than nothing.)
Write now, edit later. (Leave your perfectionism at the door.)
Find what makes you most creative. (Play music, write during the same time of day, find good snacks, write in the right setting, and so on).
These are definitely helpful tips—things you 100% want to do whether you have writer’s block or not, but they’re not much use against more stubborn forms of creative constipation.
That’s where my three failsafe fix-its come in. They have always worked for me, no matter the situation. 
1. Change your writing method.
Story time! I haven’t been able to write for personal prodjects on a computer for four years—about as long as I’ve been writing and editing for my career. I associate my computer with business—even now that I’m between jobs.
My creativity freezes up whenever I try to work on one of my stories, and I get really distracted. Eventually I end up down a rabbit hole looking up limnic eruptions or different types of crocodiles, having only written a paragraph of a completely unrelated story. 
I swapped to hand-writing stuff just after my son was born, and that worked for a long time. I filled several notebooks with some great content (that will eventually be ready for you to read). But then my kid started walking, and I became his favorite chair.
If I have a pen, my kid wants it. And he won’t take a decoy pen. He specifically wants the pen in my hand, so writing when he’s awake is kind of out of the question. (I can only draw when he’s awake because I can balance my tablet on the back of our sofa.) Plus, those of you with munchkins know that you’re generally doing other responsible adult things when the kiddo is asleep, making writing then rather difficult.
I learned I can get a lot of writing done on my phone in the Apple Notes app. It sure beats doom-scrolling Tumblr and is a vast improvement over my retro minesweeper game when I’m spending some quality time in the bathroom. It’s also something I can write with when standing up, sitting on the couch, or hiding behind the baby gate on our stairs.
Can’t get the words out on Google Docs? Switch to Microsoft Word. Getting distracted on your computer? Handwrite your story—in a notebook or even on colorful construction paper. Don’t be afraid to experiment, even across the same story.
2. Get a second opinion.
I have a character floating around my WIPs who’s an absolute blast to write (I can unleash my full punning arsenal), but he’s also an ENFP, meaning we see the world in completely different ways. I often find myself stuck on how he would get out of the really nutty situations he often gets himself into. Thankfully, my ESFJ husband has really strong Extroverted Intuition (an ENFP’s dominant Jungian function), so I can often turn to him and ask, “What would be the dumbest could-work way you’d fix this problem?”
Asking for a second opinion is surprisingly low on most writer’s block fix-it lists, but it is by far one of the most helpful. I’ve been my mom’s developmental story consultant since I could read, and it’s been a great way for her to really churn out the novels. (It’s also a great motivation to finish your story because at least one person will be wanting to read it when you’re done.)
Even if you don’t take someone’s advice, it might still spark something that’ll propel your story forward.
3. Change your story’s direction.
Adapted from The Writing Life by Annie Dillard
Writing, in many ways, is a lot like digging a silver mine. As you rummage around your own head for precious nuggets (those really impactful scenes readers remember forever), you’re setting up a sturdy narrative shaft, using exposition and rising action to fortify walls so your story doesn’t collapse on itself.
Experienced miners know when a shaft isn’t structurally sound. They won’t willingly enter or work on a mine that could cave in on them, gauging the safety of the mine through small clues—clues their demanding boss is completely blind to. 
Your creative subconscious is a miner, and you, its employer. While not always, writer’s block could be an early sign that your story is about to collapse. Perhaps you’ve accidentally let a plot hole grow too large to fill with easy edits, or maybe the way you’re taking your story will fall flat, leaving you and your readers unsatisfied. Sure, you can force your creative subconscious to continue, but you’ll end up with a lot of unusable content in the end.
If you think you’re in a mine shaft writer’s block scenario, go back several plot points and start writing in another direction. If that doesn’t work, go back a few more plot points. While doing so may temporarily upset the plans you had for the novel, it will let you continue writing in peace and produce a better finished product.
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creative-type · 3 months
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First, I've been loving all of your analyses on One Piece, FMA, and other series. It teaches me a lot about writing and makes me appreciate these authors' skills in ways I hadn't before despite regarding them so highly.
I mainly wanted to ask, how did you get so good at doing analysis?
I want to write stories myself when I'm a lot older and wiser, but I have trouble picking up on the existence of tropes and subtle implementation of various things like foreshadowing, themes, and character development. It also makes me feel really nervous to start writing as a result since I have no idea where to start. I feel like knowing how to analyze as well as you do would help greatly with all that and help me get started on making a story. I really hope this isn't too much. Thank you.
First things first, I would advise you to not wait to start writing. Everyone sucks when they start out at a new skill, and all the preparation in the world won’t do as much good as actually doing the thing. There are way to many people out there who psych them out of trying new things and hobbies because they think they aren’t ready, so they study and read books and watch videos, and at the end of the day never start. Don’t be one of those people. To be good at something, you must first suck at that thing. Embrace the suck, for by doing you will learn how to suck less.
That being said, I have always had more of an analytical mind and was lucky enough that my mom was a teacher who during summer vacations paid me and my siblings a penny a page to read and offered a dollar a page for book reports, and would discuss with us what we were reading. Analysis is a skill that can be developed, and the questions I always start with are “What is the author trying to say?” and “Were they successful in saying it?”. There are others who come at it from different angles and there are many theories of media analysis, but that has always been the most interesting to me. It forces me to pay attention not to what the characters are literally saying on the page, and peel back the layers of process till I reach what I believe to be the authorial intent.
In high school and into my college years I was pretty obsessed with the tumblr @reasoningwithvampires, which ruthlessly dissected the Twilight series on a sentence by sentence scale, both in its offenses against the English language and how it fails to be an effective love story. It was a big inspiration for what I do with my One Piece blog, and I attribute it to significantly improvising my college exit score in English despite never taking an English or literature class while in college. I also listen to a lot of YouTube analysis videos for film, video games, and books. You have to be discerning though, and stay way from reactionary, bad faith analysis. But even bad analysis can teach about good analysis, and if you find yourself reading or watching something you think is fundamentally wrong, build up an argument in your head as to why. In that way you open up a dialogue (even if it’s only in your own mind) not just between yourself and the author, but the greater community as a whole.
Good analysis takes time and thought. Most things I write for I have read more than once. Read initially for pure enjoyment, but if you like something enough to revisit it, take your time to read slowly and critically, and again always ask questions. Why did this plot twist work? Where did the author insert foreshadowing? What themes were introduced in the first act the get paid off in the third? As you become more practiced you’ll pick up on these things even on an initial read through. If you’re interested in a specific genre, try to learn the history and development of that genre. Read the classics and figure out why they’re classics, and see how they’ve influenced whatever came after. In that way you’ll learn more about what you love, because stories are always in dialogue with the past while setting the standard for the future.
But mostly don’t be afraid to suck, because you will suck. My first stories and analysis were bad, shallow, and poorly written. But over time you will find your own voice and develop a style all your own. It’s okay to start small, but don’t ever, ever stop yourself from starting.
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