#my own blog being at the top of what i reblog ha | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bwabys-scenarios · 6 months

Note

Hi bwaby ~ I’m new to your page and I love your yandere posts ^^ I’m reading the ones you’ve written for Kurapika. I saw your requests were open.

How do you think hxh yanderes would respond to their captive s/o having a panic/anxiety attacks when their captor tries to get intimate? How would they go about that?

🖤 ur work 🖤🖤🖤 thnx

Yandere!HXH respond to you panicking during intimacy

!!REBLOGS APPRECIATED!!

warnings: dubcon, panic attack, bad aftercare, forced cuddling, slight manipulation/coercion with Chrollo(it backfires), vomit in Chrollo’s, Feitan is emotionally distant, Kurapika is unstable

A/N: just a little note that none of my yanderes will ever rape the reader. I just include dubious consent because being captive blurs the lines of consent. Can you really consent when you’re captive? I don’t know, so I include it just in case, even though in my eyes reader is always consenting during these acts. I’m not comfortable with writing out rape, so this situation is the farthest I go.

characters included: Kurapika, Leorio, Chrollo, Feitan, Illumi

Yandere NSFW: @lightshowerrr @jungtoast @nenggie @aliceattheart @pannacottababy

‼️If you want to be added to the taglist, please check out the taglist information then comment what you want to be added to! Make sure you have your age in your bio and that your blog can be tagged/mentioned!‼️

Kurapika

First of all, Kurapika is VERY hesitant to initiate any intimacy after he takes you away. He wants you to get used to your captivity before he starts anything.

Kurapika is also the only yandere on this list that won’t be overly pushy in terms of physical contact most if the time, and honestly he’s okay if you never love him again… even if he really wants you to love him and give him lots of affection. He knows he did something unforgivable by taking you away from your life, and he’s willing to be hated by you if it means you’ll be safe.

Now, when you do eventually initiate some kind of intimacy he is over the moon. He would do anything for you, desperate to please you and make the experience as good as possible. Kurapika wants your love, your physical touch, and he wants it willingly.

So when he initiates, kissing along your neck with his hand gently rubbing your clothed cunt, he stops immediately when you start to panic. “My angel? Are you okay?”

He’s quick to pull away and give you space. His hands shake and he feels guilt and panic rise in his own chest. Did he just ruin all of the progress the two of you had?

But you calm down after a little, and lean against him. “I… I’m sorry, I just… I got really anxious.”

He’s quick to wrap his arms around you, tentatively smoothing out your hair. “Don’t apologize… shh, just relax. We don’t have to do anything.”

Kurapika spends the rest of the night just a bit unstable, terrified that he’ll do something to upset you. He just loves you so much and he doesn’t want to lose your love and affection when he just got it back. The next day he makes sure to pamper you more than usual, and he’s almost a bit clingy… as if he’s scared he’ll lose you.

Leorio

He’s pretty handsy, though most of his touches are just affectionate in nature. When you cuddle, he has his hand in your ass or thigh, kneading at the soft flesh.

Leorio likes to have you in his lap as often as possible, where he can move you as he pleases as cover you in kisses as he holds you as close as possible.

He’s eager to get back to sex after he takes you, though he won’t push… too much. Leorio is just super clingy and you’re already sitting pretty on his lap, the only thing separating you from his is that pretty skirt you’re wearing!

It was a normal day, with you sitting in his lap after he tugged you his way. But this time, instead of the usual soft squish he’d give your thigh or kisses to your cheek or the top of your head, Leorio started moving you back and forth against the bulge firming in his pants.

You instantly froze, feeling his warm breath on your neck. When you began to panic and cry, Leorio paused for a moment. “Princess? Something wrong?”

When you started to struggle, he gently set you down. The air was thick and heavy with tension and awkward energy. He scratched the back of his neck, his boner gone. “You alright?”

You shook your head. “I… I don’t want to, Leorio… I’m scared…”

He felt his heart break a little, but he was quick to reach out and gently ruffle your hair. “Don’t be scared… I won’t… do anything to you that you don’t want…”

But it felt a bit hypocritical, considering he did steal you from your old life against your will. Leorio had standards though, and one of those was not assaulting people.

That night, he was way less clingy than usual, giving you some space and time to process things… but you joined him in bed for snuggles later.

Chrollo

He kept telling you he wanted to make your first time with him special, that he’d buy you flowers and pretty lingerie to wear. He even suggested getting a nicer hotel than usual, which was shocking because the hotels you usually stayed in with him were beyond luxurious.

So when the special night came, he took you out to a fancy dinner, letting you order whatever you wanted. You had become very complacent, accepting the fact you’d never be able to escape him… not even in death.

So you are your food, and you bathed before putting on the set of lingerie he surely paid a high price for, and sat on the bed, waiting for him to get back from a meeting with some phantom troupe members that were in town.

The wait already had you anxious, but the way he kept going on and on about how perfect he made everything and how much effort he put into this night put a lot of pressure on you to do well.

And that was on purpose. He wanted you to know just how much he had done for you… how much he craved and adored you. With him, you would be endlessly pampered and loved… all you had to do was be a good girl and do as he said.

So by the time he got back, you were already anxiously fidgeting with your lacy black lingerie, biting your lip.

Now… he didn’t want to make you anxious, just a little nervous. He thought it would be cute to see you squeak like a timid little mouse as he took you… he didn’t want you to stiffly lie down and tear up when he unbuttoned his shirt.

And he hadn’t expected you to throw up from the stress of it all.

He felt a bit guilty, you were crying and muttering apologies as he called for room service, trying to clean it up yourself. Had he instilled that much fear in you that you shook in terror at the thought of upsetting you? That’s not what Chrollo wanted… despite his sly and manipulative nature, he wanted you to genuinely love him and see him as someone that protected and took care of you.

So once you calmed down a little, he pulled you in and snuggled you, kissing the top of your head. “I..: apologize. We’ll do this at your pace.”

You couldn’t really break away from his grip… and you didn’t want to anger him, so you let him hold you close and gently rock you.

Feitan

Feitan already is absolute garbage with intimacy, so it’s rare he’ll initiate anything. He’s both insecure and emotionally distant, but also longs for your affection and physical touch.

But he also HATES physical touch… so being his darling is a confusing experience where you’re constantly walking on eggshells.

The rare instances when he tries to be intimate with you, you almost leap with joy. He’s the only other human you have physical contact with, and you’ve almost gone crazy without touch and affection.

He’s very insecure and sensitive to rejection, so when he touches you, even if it’s just subpar, you praise him endlessly with soft whimpers and moans. He’s pretty skilled with his fingers considering he was a virgin before he met you.

So when he’s got his hands on your hips and ready to push his cock into your pretty pussy, instead of the usual happy whines you make… you instead whimper and shy away from him.

He’s tortured many people, so he can recognize the signs of a panic attack easily. You don’t know what came over you, but you just started to break down, crying and rocking yourself.

Feitan froze up, not knowing what to do. He’s not used to comforting others, and he already feels the harsh sting of rejection from your reaction. Was he that bad?

But… he’s able to push that away. He puts a blanket over your naked form and gently rubs your back while looking the other way.

“… don’t have to. Just say when don’t want it.”

And that’s all you get. He doesn’t kiss away your tears or clean you up… but it’s a big step forward. For Feitan, comforting another human being is hard, so the fact he’s trying for you proves that you mean something to him.

599 notes · View notes

daddyricsdoll · 1 year

Text

✩ ♬ ₊˚.🎧⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Hello and welcome!! I'm Ce an aspiring WAG and motorsport enthusiast. McLaren is my favourite team with Lewis, Oscar and Lando being my favourite drivers. I also love football Liverpool and Real Madrid are my favourite teams.

I also have a side blog where I reblog things that don't relate to F1. Although I’m not too active on there.

My requests are closed but you can still send me the kinkiest and unholy thoughts you have, I'm probably thinking them too. Or play it safe with fluff. Things that don’t relate to f1 at all are welcome too and many thanks from everyone who has interacted with my blog. 💗

Fics are oldest-top and newest-bottom.

© Don’t be afraid to reblog or comment but please do not copy my work. I work hard to write and publish it for people on this platform which also means I own it. Majority if not all of it is 18+ so you are warned. I do think it’s best for minors to not interact with the smut, but I can’t stop you like no one could with me. Anyways, I hope you have a stunning day!

1k ✭ Celebration!!

Latest work: Vanilla? ✭ Oscar Piastri

Personal favourites: To Love ✭ Lando Norris and Pleasure ✭ Paul Aron

Most popular: Vanilla? ✭ Oscar Piastri

Lando Norris

Tender ✭ Lando Norris -Smut 0.6k words

Summary: Just a short blurb of smut and some sweet fluff with Lando after playing padel

To Love ✭ Lando Norris- Smut and Fluff 3.7k words

Summary: Lando Norris is easy to love, and how lucky I am that he's mine. These are the five moments that made us feel so much more than just love!

Last Christmas ✭ Lando Norris- Smut 1.9k

Summary: Christmas couldn't be finished without a special present from Lando, maybe more than one.

Masquerade ✭ Lando Norris and Oscar Piastri- Smut 2.2k

Summary: A night at a masquerade ball ended much better than you had ever dreamed of. Starting with two men and one you.

Now ✭ Lando Norris- Smut 1.5k

Summary: The ache between your legs was so strong seeing Lando hold control in the DJ booth at the club. But holding control of Lando also made your pussy drenched. Luckily Lando had a need for you too, and you both planned on conquering those needs.

Stream ✭ Lando Norris- Smut 0.8k

Summary: Lando had left you to stream Fortnite, and a hint of jealously sparked inside of you. But the thought of making him regret that choice, for now and the future, held a more prominent standing.

Touch me ✭ Lando Norris and Ollie Bearman- Smut 2.5k

Summary: After many times of asking you finally said yes to Lando, but with one catch. The innocent virgin Oliver Bearman would be there too.

Two is better than one ✭ Lando Norris and Jude Bellingham- Smut 3.9k

Summary: It was hard to suppress your feelings for your best friend since childhood, especially if he's the Lando Norris. But then you met an alluring man who had made you question if you had loved Lando or if this was an act of lust. Soon growing a desire for both men but still questioning what to do. Until they decided to give you the answer- two is better than one.

Hands and Knees- Suggestive 0.2k

From my 1k celebration! Summary: "If your parents weren't here you'd be on your hands and knees."

Daniel Ricciardo

Ride ✭ Daniel Ricciardo- Smut 1k

Summary: Daniels arm might have stopped him from a few things, but with his good girl willing to do anything and everything to take care of him, he could tick one of the boxes as satisfied.

Good Girl ✭ Daniel Ricciardo- Smut 0.8k

Summary: You wanted to please Daniel, but you didn't know how. Luckily Daniel is a great teacher even from the comfort of his couch and your head between his legs. Plus, he always gives rewards too.

Charles Leclerc

Bigger than the whole sky ✭ Charles Leclerc -angst 0.3k words

Summary: The aftermath of you and Charles' Relationship. He was bigger than the whole sky.

Carlos Sainz

Truth or Dare ✭ Carlos Sainz -Smut 1.5k words

Summary: You go to your best friends house for a distraction, but her boyfriend intrudes on that and you are left alone, until her brother comes along and decides a little game of truth or dare can be a distraction.

Far ✭ Carlos Sainz- Smut 0.8k

Summary: You and Carlos may have been Kilometres apart but that didn't mean you couldn't cum together.

The guy coming home to me ✭ Carlos Sainz- Fluff? 0.7k words

Summary: Investing in a F1 team in the middle of your worldwide tour was very outrageous and threw many questions at you. But of course they didn't know that you happened to date one of the drivers in the team, until a concert in Singapore.

Sebastian Vettel

Clandestine ✭ Sebastian Vettel -Smut 1.1k words

Summary: You lay on your bed masturbating imagining it's your dads young german friend that happens to be downstairs. You moan a little too loud and then someone opens the door.

Oscar Piastri

Soft ✭ Oscar Piastri- Smut 0.5k words

Summary: Some soft sex with Oscar after he won the sprint in Qatar.

Masquerade ✭ Lando Norris and Oscar Piastri-Smut 2.2k

Summary: A night at a masquerade ball ended much better than you had ever dreamed of. Starting with two men and one you.

Good Boy ✭ Oscar Piastri- Smut 1.3k

Summary: You love Oscar so much, especially when he's a good boy and you have control. And for being such a good boy you think Oscar deserves to cum many times.

Sensitive ✭ Oscar Piastri- Smut 0.3k

Summary: Just one more for Oscar, you knew he could take it.

Vanilla? ✭ Oscar Piastri- Smut 1.6k

Summary: It's always the quiet ones that are the freakiest. But that wasn't what every other driver on the grid thought as they teased Oscar and you for being too innocent to know anything beyond vanilla sex. So when you guys didn't put up a fight, they figured they were right... until someone was lucky enough to see you and Oscar on the other end of the spectrum of "plain sex".

Hold you- Fluff 0.2k

This is part of my 1k celebration! Summary: "Can I hold you?"

Ollie Bearman

First ✭ Ollie Bearman- Smut 1.1k words

Summary: Ollie deserves a reward after that amazing win in Monza.

Friends? ✭ Ollie Bearman- Smut 1.9k

Summary: You and Ollie were just friends, no matter how much your feelings grew or your need for his lips against yours. Well that was what you thought when you found someone else to put your mind to for the evening, but maybe not with Ollie's furrowed brows and glares.

Sweet ✭ Ollie Bearman- Smut 0.9k words

Summary: Watching a Christmas movie together turns into riding Ollie, and it's just as sweet as the hot chocolate he made.

My turn ✭ Ollie Bearman- Smut 0.6k words

Summary: You won your first race and now it's Ollie's turn to reward you.

Hate but I love you too ✭ Ollie Bearman - Smut 2.7k words

Summary: From when he ignored you then nearly kissed your lips. Or never said sorry to begging for you. Oliver was a rollercoaster of emotions and it's safe to say- It took hate to love him.

You ✭ Ollie Bearman- Smut 1k

Summary: You had adapted to what Ollie needed but recently you had noticed there was something else, and obviously you planned on conquering it.

Benefits ✭ Ollie Bearman- Smut 1k

Summary: Going to Ollie's home for dinner is easy. But being friends like this, has its benefits. In this case Ollie wanted his time home to be better than it already was, starting in his sim chair.

Touch me ✭ Lando Norris and Ollie Bearman- Smut 2.5k

Summary: After many times of asking you finally said yes to Lando, but with one catch. The innocent virgin Oliver Bearman would be there too.

How much I love you- Fluff 0.3k

From my 1k celebration! Summary: "You have no clue how much I love you."

Max Verstappen

You know ✭ Max Verstappen- Smut 1.9k

Summary: Max got his 3rd world title and he had an idea on how to celebrate.

False God ✭ Max Verstappen- Smut 4.5k

Summary: Being lost spiritually isn't something you can brag about, but finding a new belief in someone is. From that alluring man in the F1 paddock to finding out he's the Max Verstappen didn't effect you as much as discovering his lips are your new religion even if it's a false god.

George Russell

Quiet ✭ George Russell- Smut 1.1k

Summary: Maybe it was because you were proud, or maybe it was because he was yours. But you needed him, in more ways than one, starting in the car.

Lewis Hamilton

Please ✭ Lewis Hamilton- Smut 2.1k

Summary: You were supposed to celebrate Lewis's great P2 until you found out about the disqualification and he just needed something else.

Shut up- Smut 0.4k

From my 1k celebration! Summary: "Do you ever shut up?" "Only when I'm eating you out."

Liam Lawson

Little celebration ✭ Liam Lawson- Smut 0.7k

Summary: There was no doubt everyone beamed with smiles after Liam scored his maiden points in F1, which meant the race debrief between the two of you couldn't be the same as others. And you made sure of that.

Paul Aron

Pleasure ✭ Paul Aron- Smut 1.3k

Summary: Paul had the opportunity to drive a beautiful car, and have a beautiful passenger next to him. So why not make the most of it?

Jude Bellingham

Two is better than one ✭ Lando Norris and Jude Bellingham- Smut 3.9k

More coming soon... but while you wait you can look at some wallpapers!

1K notes · View notes

kedreeva · 1 month

Note

You're sort of one of the kindest people i know on tumblr, so. um. i had a question.

how do i deal with it all?

right of the bat i will tell you i am a minor and my parents are zionists, so i have no income of my own or anything i could donate. everytime i post a single fundraiser that reaches my inbox and is vetted, i get 4-5 new fundraising asks for palestine.

most of them are unvetted, but i keep thinking that if i can't donate i should at least have faith in people and reblog the fundraisers even if they're unvetted, possibly that they're actually new and need as much help we can give, however, there's a possibility they are scams, and i don't want to draw away the attention vetted fundraisers might get.

how do you decide where to help out and how to live with your decision?

I have a policy that when it comes to asks (or messages) that solicit money or other actions (like boosting posts) I don't respond to or even publish asks that come from anyone that has never spoken to me before that moment, and that's a policy that has been in place for many years now, and is unlikely to change largely because the majority of asks/messages that are requesting money or to visit a blog post/their blog/their website are scams (or more often several years ago, led to virus infections on your computer!). My blog is, as it has stated at the top for over ten years now, a personal blog, not a fundraising/signal boosting/vetting blog for spreading donations- there ARE blogs like that, and people can choose to interact with those blogs or not, but my blog isn't the place for it and that's a hard boundary I enforce for my own well being. Tumblr is my place to rest and recover, however I see fit to do that.

A random ask to my inbox asking for money, regardless of what it is for, is (in my view) equivalent to a cold call from a stranger soliciting money. It's not about faith in people, it's not about right or wrong, it's not about can or can't. This is my home, and I don't answer the phone to unknown numbers. I will help friends/family/people I know personally (or parasocially, if I like them or recognize them), obviously, but that's a bit of a different horse.

As for how I decide where to help out, if I have the ability (funds, spoons, time etc), I will seek out information on the best place to donate that can do the most with the money to help the person/people/cause that I want to help. It's the Food Pantry Equation: I could spend $5 on groceries at retail price to donate, and maybe get enough for 1 meal for 1 person (though in this fuckoff capitalist hellscape, I'm not sure $5 would even buy a whole meal), or I could give $5 directly to a Food Pantry organization, who buys in bulk and knows where to get stuff cheap, so that my $5 can help five people or ten people or whatever. I also do my best to participate in fandom events that raise money for good causes; stuff like the fanworks charity auction I helped run to donate to a wolf sanctuary, or stuff like Fandom Trumps Hate (another charity fanworks auction event). Those kind of events are generally open about where the donations go to, and have done research into organizations to ensure the gathered money goes to good charities.

Like with the above, however, it's different if I know the person. If my neighbor comes and asks for a cup of sugar or my friend needs help moving or whatever, I'm gonna give them what they need without the middleman because we have that relationship already established. Donating $5 to a food pantry would probably help more people by numbers, but helping my neighbors and friends and family etc builds community in a way giving $5 to a random stranger on the phone soliciting money cannot, and even in a way donating $5 (or $5 worth of food) to a Food Pantry cannot. It's also usually a matter of one and done, as well as semi-transactional the way any relationship is a give and take; I can give my neighbor some sugar, and down the road they can return the favor the next time I'm in need of help. I help my friends move and I know whether or not I ever move, myself, that they would do the same for me if they're able. You can't say this about a random ask on the Internet and you likely won't ever be able to say it for most charities unless you somehow end up in their exact area of expertise. So it's different.

I feel like you should also learn about Tim Wong, the guy who basically single-handedly repopulated the Pipevine Swallowtail butterfly out in California. The lesson his story can and should teach is that... sometimes it can do more good for the world to care Very Much about one specific thing, and put your heart and soul into it, than it does to spread a little bit of care over a lot of things.

So, I guess what I mean to say here is... don't feel guilty about what you cannot do. There's no guilt in that. When you are ready and able to help, you can always go and look for a good way to do so (and what you end up helping may not always be the thing you think it will be), but you don't need to feel pressured by telemarketers or charity donation calls from strangers while you're trying to eat dinner. Especially if they don't even know who you are, either.

#asks #anon asks #how to help #You cannot help others if you're burnt out #and you burn out feeling guilt where there's no need

202 notes · View notes

ayeforscotland · 2 months

Text

What is Dataflow? Part 3: Doing the Practical

Apologies for the delay in getting this next section up - past few weeks have been super busy and then, hilariously, I was ill last week.

Read Part 1 here.

Read Part 2 here.

In Part 2 I wrote about how important diagrams have been throughout history. Understanding the 'big picture' has been important for every triumph of engineering. From bridges to skyscrapers to oil rigs and wind turbines, all of these have had diagrams backed by international standards which enabled them to be built.

The digital world hasn't quite managed that yet. In the other posts I've tried to drill home the point that modern digital businesses are often extremely siloed, communication and documentation isn't there and there is a lack of a common language between 'Business' and 'IT'.

This lack of understanding means organisations do not understand how data flows through their business and their supply chain.

It's the understanding of dataflow that's important here because it enables organisations to focus on optimising, securing and maintaining flows across an organisation rather than siloed teams patching things up where they can and not understand the upstream and downstream impact on the business.

Method and Layers

Going to preface this by saying that this may come across as complete common sense, and to some extent you'll be completely correct!

This is an example of how to create a very basic dataflow. But I will first start with understanding all of the People, Processes and Technology that I use to post on Tumblr.

So I start with six layers:

Ownership

Business Process

Application

System

Hardware

Infrastructure

What is important to remember here is that you do not have to be a specialist in every single layer.

A Business Analyst will feel much more at home in the Business Process Layer, while an Infrastructure Manager will be much more knowledgeable about the Infrastructure layer.

The important thing is that this Business & IT Diagram allows them to communicate more efficiently.

Let's Build a Dataflow!

In this example - There's an 'AyeforScotland' Element (the rectangle!) at the top. I'm the owner of everything below that element. The black lines are 'connections' representing the connectivity between the different elements.

Following the example, I'm responsible for' managing my blog 'Blog Management' which breaks down into smaller processes: Draft posts, schedule posts, answer anon abuse, and reblog shitposts.

Coming down to the Application Layer (red) - You can see that I draft and schedule posts using Tumblr Desktop and I'm using Firefox Web Browser for that.

But for answering anon abuse and reblogging shitposts, I'm using the Tumblr App.

In the Systems layer you can see I'm using Windows 11 on my PC (Hardware) and I'm using iOS on my iPhone.

Both my PC and iPhone connect to my BT Router.

And that's it for this Business & IT Diagram. I've shown clearly how I'm responsible for the processes and how I use the technology to perform those processes. I don't necessarily need to show everything on a single diagram because it would lose clarity.

This next Business & IT Diagram is much smaller, and establishes the relationships and dependencies on Tumblr to provide the service. And that's because we're complying with the laws and rules of a methodology.

In this diagram (probably need to zoom in to see it) I'm at the top left as 'AyeforScotland' and my 'BT Router' is spatially below me. Following the rules and laws of the method, that maintains the relationship that I have with the BT Router, I own it.

But I don't own the small 'Internet' that's next to it horizontally. I've simplified the concept of the internet for this example.

There's also two owners - 'Automattic' which owns and operates 'Tumblr' below it, with Tumblr being responsible for the 'Provision of Tumblr Services'.

Now naturally 'provision of Tumblr services' will break out into loads of sub-processes. Tumblr could map out their entire organisation (and if they need a hand, they can DM me!) But for this dataflow it's not really required.

Now both diagrams above are not dataflows. But close your eyes for a second and you can visualise what they are.

But because we've created our two diagrams, we understand the connectivity and using the software we can create the dataflow.

Now again, this is very basic. But when you put things into a dataflow context, you can put this down in front of a wide range of people from different business disciplines and they can start to optimise how the business works.

Here's a much larger Dataflow example, that you won't be able to read because it exceeds A0 printing size, but it should convey the scale.

If any of the connections or elements fail along this dataflow - The dataflow stops.

This costs organisations time and/or money.

So understanding dataflows allows IT people to articulate to business people "Hi boss, if this server goes down it will bring down this dataflow and cost the business $10,000 an hour" - Suddenly it's in a language they understand.

It helps with strategic decision-making, it helps with communication, it helps document how things *actually* work as opposed to how people think they work, and once you switch to thinking in terms of 'dataflow' it's hard to stop.

Conclusion

I can't wait to answer all the questions on the back of this.

Also one area I didn't go into is that each of the elements (rectangles) can also hold data (Financial data, Technical Specs, Risk & Cybersecurity metrics, Governance documentation etc).

It's also really easy to get started with it. You can start in any of the layers based on your area of work.

#ayeforscotland #dataflow #digital engineering #diagrams #crowdstrike

173 notes · View notes

ramp-it-up · 5 months

Text

II Most Wanted Part 5: Wherever You Take Me

Pairing: Syverson x OFC Reader "Buttercup"

Summary: The cookout gets hot and dinner with Sy is a revelation. Plus, you get to see his place. 😏

Warnings: 18+ Only, Minors DNI. RPF. S MUT, Fluff, Angst, Reader has PCOS, talk of infertility, talk of war, daydreaming about shower sex, anal play, natural hairstyles, clothes kink if you squint, voice/dirty talk kink, Graphic depiciton of sex. Woman on top, size kink, slight choking, squirting, nipple play, begging, raw p in v, copious amounts of cum. I did not mean to disparage yoga in any way.

Read at your own risk. Not Beta’d. All errors my own.

A/N: This is the fifth installment of II Most Wanted. I'm in love with these two; they are bringing my writer heart back to life. If you like it, please reblog and comment.

I don't have a taglist. Please follow @rampitupandread and turn on notifications to learn when I post! 😘

I Do NOT Consent to my work being reposted, translated or presented on any other blog or site other than by myself.

Previous part here

———-

To say Sy had you shook was an understatement. You woke up expecting to find him there, but then you remembered saying a groggy ‘goodbye’ to him almost as soon as you hit the bed after the workout he gave you in the shower.

You lay in bed as your anxiety spiked and wondered if he took that as a dismissal. You hoped that he didn't think that you didn’t want him around. But you didn’t want him to think that you were going to just fall into his arms.

You just didn’t know what to do with these old/new crazy feelings for Sy. How well did you really know him? You knew the kid from 20 years ago, but he broke your heart. How careful would grown ass man Sy be with your love? And would he still want you if he knew the entire truth?

You decided to relax and stretch and clear your mind of all the clutter. Yes, yoga was the perfect antidote to Jacob Syverson.

—---

Yoga failed you miserably.

You found yourself checking for Sy as soon as you arrived at the cookout. You socialized as you lowkey searched for him at the function, and when you realized he wasn’t there yet, you inhaled a whiff of the shirt you were wearing for the dopamine hits. It was his dress shirt from the night before that you tore off of him and that you were wearing over your tube top and jean shorts. You couldn’t help it if he left it there and it was the perfect complement for your outfit.

It was well past noon and he hadn’t arrived. You chewed your lip and let anxiety in again. You avoided questions from Carla and Tiffani about what happened, and your mind drifted to how he’d handled you last night.

Sy’s soapy hands were all over you, pulling on your wet nipples, grabbing your wet hair as his mouth attacked your neck, and sliding over your body under the hot stream of water. He was a quick study, and at the point of your fifth orgasm, it felt as if he knew your body better than you.

And you let him take possession.

His slippery fingers toyed with and penetrated your ass as he fucked you senseless against the wet tile, ramming his thick cock inside you again and again as you begged for more. You came again, harder than you ever had, and afterward your energy drained out of you just like his cum streaming down your legs. He had to dry you off and carry you to bed, all the while leaving sweet kisses all over you.

You’d never felt so…loved...and in trouble.

As soon as your towel covered head hit the pillow, you were out like a light. You didn’t see Sy’s look of adoration, didn’t feel the kiss on the forehead that he gave you as he whispered “Sweet dreams,” and his chest puffed out with pride at having put you to sleep, a cocky smirk on his face as he let himself out and strode toward the Bronco. You were snoring softly.

You were busy reliving the experience of the night before, relishing the slight soreness of your body as Carla and Tiffani chattered around you. You weren’t really present until fingers started snapping in front of your face.

“Come back to earth…”

“Oh shit,” you giggled, “sorry, Carla. What were you saying?”

Both of your besties laughed at you.

“Umm hmm. Yeah. Well you answered the question without answering it. That dreamy look on your face says it all.”

You just smiled, rolled your eyes and sipped your cider.

“I’m just chilling. Sy and I had a good talk, and a good time last night. We buried the hatchet.”

Carla and Tiffani exchanged looks.

“I bet you did. I bet you buried it hard. And deep.”

You scoffed at them both, but Carla was unswayed.

“Tell us, Buttercup. Exactly what size hatchet does Jacob Syverson carry?”

You shook your head and took another drink, rolling at your friends’ ridiculousness.

”Well, if you don’t want to give the details about Sy’s dick, you’ve got to tell us the story of that hair.”

Carla nodded toward your thick cornrows.

“Did Sy mess it up so badly that you had to detangle in the shower, or did you get tangled up with Sy in the shower?”

Your cheeks heated as you took another swig and scanned the park to avoid answering your intuitive friends. And when you saw the Bronco, you almost choked.

You put your beverage down and straightened up, patting your head. Sy had arrived.

“Does it look alright?”

“It looks dope,” Tiffani looked around to see Betty Bronco pulling into a parking spot.

“Oh shit, she is sprung. This is gonna be good.”

Their teasing faded into the background as you watched Sy unfold out of Betty Bronco and were reminded of the night before as he ran his hand over his beard. That beard. How wet that beard got last night. Both in and out of the shower…

You took in the vision of this man who indeed had you sprung after one night. You sighed when you saw him come toward you. Although he was dressed simply, a dark grey t-shirt and jeans, he looked like the best thing you’d seen in ages.

Damn, he was hot. Or was it that you’d just spent too much time in the sun? He strode toward you and the way his body moved was dangerous. You felt that you would hit your knees with the slighted signal from him.

Sy was indeed hot. And you may have also had sunstroke. Both things could be true. What else would explain the way your heart was beating and the weird feeling in your stomach?

Yes. Sunstroke it was. And lust. And nothing else.

Your friends’ laughter pierced your reverie and you got up to meet him before he reached the group.

—------

Sy got home that morning and fell into his bed, daydreaming of having you in it. It was 4 am, and he fully intended on sleeping just a few hours, then waking up and sending you a good morning text.

Soon he was dead to the world.

The next thing he knew, it was 11:30, too late for a morning text. He would just have to greet you in person at the cookout. He got out of bed to get ready, taking extra time with his hair and beard. He hadn’t cared this much about how he looked since high school. He hadn’t cared this much about anything since you. He wanted to be the one that you wanted. If it was a quarter of the way he wanted you, he’d be a lucky man.

Plans rolled around in his head as he rolled toward you in Betty Bronco, but also uncertainty. Was this just a trip down memory lane for you? Just a whim of a weekend, a chance to experience everything you didn’t 20 years ago?

Whatever this was, he wasn’t going to waste any time.

When Sy pulled up at the event almost an hour late, lo and behold, there you were. His eyes fell on you, a vision in his white shirt, your lips wrapped around what looked like a beer bottle. Your hair was different. Sexy. But then again, every look was sexy on you it seemed.

“Well, ain’t that a daisy.”

His heart did a thing and he took a beat, trying to be cool. Sy thanked his lucky stars before he got out of the Bronco, his destination not even a question.

—--

You met him under a live oak tree, a few feet from the picnic tables. Carla and Tiffany and a couple of other people called hello to him, but he just nodded and waved at them as he focused on you.

You in his shirt was one thing, but the tube top and shorts you were wearing, he felt as if he hit the jackpot as his eyes feasted on your curves. He licked his lips as if to recall the taste of some of them.

You stood there as Sy’s eyes roamed your body possessively, and although it was 82 degrees, you shivered. Maybe you were getting the flu.

“Hullo there, Buttercup.”

Sy beamed down at you and you screamed at him in your mind as you flushed hot again. ‘Where have you been!? Why did you leave!?’

But instead you just said, “Hello, Sy.”

You grinned back up at him, suddenly okay. More than okay. Sy’s attention was a powerful drug and you’d forgotten that you were an addict. You wanted it all the time.

“‘D’you sleep well?”

You bit your lip and grinned again as you played with the collar of the shirt you were wearing. Sy could glimpse a hickey that he’d put on your collarbone and he felt the urge to take you behind the tree and give you more. You had some powerful magic.

“Yes. Very.”

He took off his sunglasses then and stepped closer to you. His smile was contagious.

“I’m glad. You were knocked out when I left. Seemed tired.”

Your smile dropped as you chewed your lip.

“Yeah, about that. I didn’t mean to kick you out.”

Sy shifted his stance closer to you.

“You didn’t kick me out, Buttercup. You were exhausted. I said I was going to give you space.”

“You did?”

You stared at him, wide eyed. He chuckled.

“You don’t remember that, do you?”

You sighed in relief and looked at the ground, cheeks heated.

“No.”

Your voice was small and Sy’s heart lurched, He had hope. Maybe you did have feelings for him other than lust if you thought you’d hurt his. He reached for your hand, just your fingers really, and caressed them softly. He smiled at you when you looked up at him again.

“It’s okay, Buttercup. Really. I got some rest. And If I’d stayed, I have a feeling that we would still be in bed right now.”

The deep timbre of his voice and the affirmation of what you already knew had you shook, imagining a morning in bed with Sy. You went silent, staring up at him with those eyes. His cock stirred. Shit, you were so hot when you went lust-mute. He cleared his throat.

“I like your hair.”

Sy nodded at you.

“Thanks. Got a little wet last night, had to do something…”

Sy smiled at the shower memories.

“Looks great. Like your outfit, too.”

He adjusted the collar of the shirt you were weating, eyes sweeping down your form to get a look at you underneath it. He knew that all he had to do was hook his finger in your tube top and your breasts would spill out. He licked his lips as he regarded you, eyes shining with need when he looked back up into your eyes.

Your mouth opened as if for air as you stood stock still, like a deer caught in headlights. You wanted the same things he did. Damn. You were dickmatized.

“I can see what you’re thinking, Buttercup. But everyone is watching us.”

You huffed out a breath, moved closer, grabbing his t-shirt to bring him down for a kiss. You heard some people murmur and your friends high five and laugh behind you.

Sy felt triumphant. He grabbed your waist and kissed you back. Thoroughly. Then you pulled back, out of breath.

“You’re right. Everyone is watching.”

Sy brought his hand up to the back of your head and looked into your eyes.

“I don’t give a fuck.”

The gruff whisper went straight to your cunt as he pulled you back in for another kiss.

He finally pulled away and you were still holding on to the stainless steel chain of his dog tags. You looked up at him, ready to ditch the cookout on a word from him.

“Didn’t you get enough last night?”

You were posing the question to yourself, as well as Sy.

Sy inhaled oxygen, because he was drowning in your vibe right now. He grunted.

“Hm. I thought you understood, Buttercup. I will never get enough.”

Another kiss. You whimpered and he just knew that you were wet for him.

“I just want to haul you in the back of Betty right now, but we’re gonna do this thing today. Tonight we’ll go out for dinner, right?”

You nodded, licking your lips as he released your waist and took your hand, leading you back to the table.

—---

You all were sitting around the table playing cards a couple of hours later with your old friend group when someone pointed at Sy’s arms.

“What happened to you, Sy? Did you get attacked by a wild animal?”

Sy looked down at the scratches you left on him with pride, smirked and started to answer, ignoring the look from you.

“Well… Sorta. Kinda. You know I like to live dangerously.”

The wink he threw the questioner was for you, however, and you knew it.

“Sy, you’re too much!”

“Funny thing. Someone said that to me recently.”

You tugged on Sy’s hand.

“Excuse us for a minute, please.”

You gave them your best dignified smile, even though you hot. Sy was chuckling as he followed you back to the live oak tree out of earshot of the group. All they could see was that he was laughing now and everyone could tell that you were giving him the business.

Your friends watched you two and smiled.

Sy put his hands up and nodded, still laughing. You turned away from him, but he grabbed your hand as you tried to walk away. You turned around, annoyed, but then he pointed to his lips, suddenly serious. You gazed at them, smiled and then reached up to kiss him, then pulled away and flipped him off. He laughed again.

"Promise?" Sy called after you.

You flipped him off again but grinned as you rejoined the table and Sy went to get more beer.

“So, when’s the wedding?”

“Shut the fuck up, Carla!”

—---

You let Sy pick you up that evening, and the mood was subdued. He complimented your dress and kissed you on the cheek, careful of your makeup, which you’d carefully applied. Your hair was curly again, the braid-out giving you the look that you wanted. You were quiet as you looked out of the window.

“What’s going on in that head of yours, Buttercup.”

You looked at him, anxiety written all over your face.

“Today was a lot.”

Sy looked back at you.

“Today was fun.”

You sighed.

“It was. A lot of fun hanging with our friends. It was like we were a couple. Carla asked… Well, I think people think we’re a thing. They expect us to…”

Sy understood. You were spooked.

“I see. Well, if you want to know, Buttercup, in my head we are a thing, but I know you aren’t there yet. I know you’re scared.”

“I’m not…!”

“It’s okay to be scared. We’ve been through a lot. Name it for what it is. I am not into bullshitting. Especially with someone I love.”

That sentence shut your mouth.

“And I don’t give a fuck what people expect us to do. I want to enjoy any time you grace me with. We’ve wasted enough time already.”

Sy picked up your hand from the leather seat and brought the back of it to his mouth. The tender kiss went straight to your soul.

“Just be here now. I mean, we can talk about the past, or the future if you want. But let’s take it one step at a time.”

You smiled at him as he pulled you closer to him and as he kissed up your arm.

“Okay.”

Somehow, you wound up with your head on his shoulder as you drove to the restaurant.

—--

The restaurant was nice, Meyers on the River, and it was a great atmosphere as you and Sy ate on the deck overlooking the lake. You chatted, filling in some of the blank spaces of your lives.

You asked a question that had been nagging you as you ate your salmon.

“Did you- did you go all in during the war? Did you agree with all of that? I mean, almost 20 years Sy. I feel like you had to have a certain kind of mindset to do that.”

Sy shook his head, leaned back, and sighed.

“It was a job. With good benefits. And my family had been enlisted, my uncle Mike. I went and after I found out about Jeremiah, I just dedicated myself to my job over there. I channeled the feelings that I had in order to prepare myself to be a father to being a leader. My men were under my care. It was hell. Hot, sweaty, full of hate. So I became Syverson, the asshole Captain who got the job done. I survived.”

Sy shrugged and toyed with his napkin.

“There were problems to be solved. And most of the time we solved them.”

You took in what he said and saw there was something deeper there.

“I’m glad that you are back home now.”

He smiled at you.

“Me too. Everything happens for a reason, Buttercup.”

You smiled back and thought about what he said. He was right.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Shoot.”

You sat back in your chair, trying to prepare yourself.

“How do you feel about never having kids? I know about your losses, and you don’t have to talk about it….”

This was part of the reason why you were so hesitant with this relationship. You took a deep breath and decided to name it.

“No. We need to talk about it. It might change your mind about me… us…

You fiddled with your fingers in your lap.

“Doubt that.”

“Just wait until I’m done, Sy.”

“Okay.”

“I have PCOS, Sy. It’s a condition that makes it very hard to get or stay pregnant. I’ve been through surgeries and meds, natural methods. The stress of my relationship also didn't help me to have healthy pregnancies. We were going to do in-vitro, but when I found out about the second mistress, I was done. Scott and I divorced and I was content to be by myself. The condition can be progressive. It’s why I take the pill everyday.”

You looked into Sy’s eyes.

“I don’t know if I will ever be able to have a baby. And I’m certainly not getting any younger.”

“I’m sorry, all that has happened to you Buttercup. But none of this changes a thing about how I feel about you or us. I still want you. I still kinda feel like forever with you.”

Sy had your hand across the table now and watched as the smile spread across your face. Something shifted inside you. Sy knew everything and he still wanted you. Maybe this could be a thing. You wanted to say so much, but instead, you just nodded at his plate.

“Finish your steak.”

Sy grinned at you.

“Yes, ma’am.”

The conversation different, lighter after that. The chef came out and you spoke, then he comped your meal.

“I will never thank you enough for helping this place to happen Mr. Syverson.”

You looked at Sy quizzically.

“We solved that problem, didn’t we Ben?”

“Yes! Come back and bring your beautiful lady any time!”

“Will do, Ben. Will do.”

Sy stood up and shook his hand, then left what he would have spent on dinner as a tip. You walked out hand in hand as you looked at his profile.

“I haven’t told you about my business. I used my payout from retirement and my injury to start a construction company. Captain Construction. We make a pretty good living. And we help folks out when we can.”

You scooted closer to him on the seat.

“Why does that not surprise me?”

“I don’t know. I feel like you are in my soul though, so…”

You gave Sy a peck on the lips, and he chased you for more.

“Want me to take you back to your place? Or would you like to see my house? Built it myself.”

You looked up in the air, as if it were even a choice.

“I want to see your house. You’ve got me curious.”

Sy grinned and started the truck. Then he shook his head and turned it off again.

“Ok, no bullshitting. If I take you to my place, I’m not gonna wanna take you back until daylight tomorrow. And maybe not even then.”

“I’ll go wherever you take me, Sy.”

—-

“Please Buttercup. I’m just a mere mortal. I can’t take this.”

You loved the way his voice broke and how Sy’s eyes were glued to your body, your glowing skin, your breasts swaying with each movement, your hand which was clutching him between your luscious thighs, which were on either side of his pelvis. You were pumping his engorged and weeping cock, teasing him, and yourself, by bouncing on just the tip, your small fist preventing full penetration.

Sy’s hands were grasping the steel bars of his headboard, stuck there by the promise he made you when you began the end of his house tour. It was a beautiful home, and now you were about to fuck his beautiful cock.

But you were testing his patience. His knuckles were white, and his biceps and pecs were flexed, forearms straining to hold back. His abs were tensed and he was gritting his teeth as he tried to respect your request, but he didn’t know that his struggle was the sexiest part.

“Hmmmm. I think this feels as good to you as it does to me, Sy.”

Sy looked to where you were connected, silently willing you to let him enter you fully. He growled.

“Please, it can feel so much better. Fuck me, Buttecup. I’m yours.”

You keened as you worked yourself open on him.

“Loot at me baby. Please. Need to see your pretty little fucked out face.”

You moaned and did as he asked. You spoke with him, halfway incoherent with pleasure as you slid down his cock.

“So, fucking hugeee. I love this big dick, Sy.”

Sy groaned as you clenched around him.

“It’s yours.”

He licked his lips as he gazed at you opening up for him. Your slick cunt clenching his cock was the most beautiful thing in the world.

“I love that tight little pussy. Is it mine?”

You reached up and grabbed his shoulders as you adjusted to his size again. You looked into his dilated eyes and gave him a kiss in response.

“Shit is so fucking big. Ah.”

Sy was quivering beneath you, still holding back from going crazy on you. While he wanted to fuck you silly, he also wanted to savor this slow sensuality with you.

“Feels amazing,” you stared down into his blazing blue eyes as you slowly circled your hips.

“Yes, it does. Holy shit it does..”

You leaned down, kissed him and started moving. Sy watched your breasts as you arched backwards and he planted his feet to fuck up into you better.

“Oh! Sy! Feel so full. So good.”

Sy growled and let the bed go, causing a grin at his loss of control. He wrapped his arms around you and held you in place as his hips moved at the devil's pace. The sound of his dick breaching your wet pussy was everything. Skin slapping on skin was the music of your heartbeats at the moment. Sy’s hand found your clit and traced wicked circles there as he pounded you out, making your eyes spark as if with stars.

“F-f-f- u-u-u-ck! I’m- I’m coming!”

It was embarrassing how quickly he had you there.

“Give me that shit, Buttercup.”

He stroked you through your peak as you gushed around him.

“Fuck. Got my balls dripping with you. This is my dream come true baby. Gimme more.”

He sat up, grabbing your ribcage and moving you up and down his now even slicker, impossibly bigger, cock.

“Shhitttt you feel so good!”

Sy looked down and then up at the ceiling, eyes rolling at the sight. He was about to cum. He manhandled you like a rag doll so that he could kiss you. Hard.

“You are hotter than the desert, Buttercup.”

Your hands moved up his abs to his pecs, rubbing your palms on his nipples as he growled and reached for you. He pulled on your sweaty breasts until your nipples remained pinched between his fingers.

“Ahhhhhh, Sy!”

You moaned and rolled your hips as he pulled on your sensitive nubs.

“Love your fucking sounds, Buttercup.”

His hand was sliding up the column of your throat now, manhandling you in the way you’d come to love in such a short time. You moaned and Sy felt the vibrations of your voice box on his palm.

“You are so goddamn pretty when you are impaled on my cock. Can’t get enough of you.”

Sy leaned back on one arm so that he could pound you the way he wanted.

“Fuck, want my cum, Buttercup?”

You were circling your own clit and squeezing your breasts at the same time.

“God, yes, Sy. Give it to me!”

“Here it comes, godamn….!”

You felt his ropes of cum spurt against your cervix as he came forcefully inside you. Sy looked down to see it and your own juices eek out of you as he kept pulsling inside you.

“It’s like it’s never gonna end, fuck! Got so much for you Buttercup.”

You reached down and played in your combined slick as he pulsed again, bringing your fingers up to taste as Sy finally finished coming.

“You’re gonna be the death of me, you know that right?”

You grinned and kissed him, as you collapsed on the bed reveling in your wet, sweaty bodies as he held you close. You wriggled out of his grip.

“Time for a shower, Sy.”

You smiled as you walked into his en suite, seeing him hot on your heels.

“Damn if I don’t die a happy man.”

You laughed at Sy as he got your hair wet again.

------

Hit Reblog if you like it!

Next part here

254 notes · View notes

totheblood · 2 years

Text

true blue. (one)

pairing: modern!ellie williams x reader

summary: ellie has a new philosophy: don't fall in love and you won't get your heart broken. ellie also has a really cute new friend. ellie admires some birds in this chapter idk if thats significant

warnings: 18+ (as a general rule for this series and my blog as a whole) suggestive themes, eventual smut, drug/alcohol usage, cursing, descriptions of abusive behavior (neither ellie or reader engages in these behaviors)

a/n: i am hoping to make this a series if enough people like it and want me too... i really appreciate support and feedback through asks and replies/reblogs, it all means so much to me. also i have this whole thing planned out and i plan for it to be very messy hehe... i love drama idk

This year was going to be different.

At least that’s what Ellie told herself as she gripped the straps of her worn out backpack. All of the classes her and Cat had planned to take together this semester she had quickly transferred out of by the end of the summer, causing her to rack up an impressive list of classes on her schedule nobody wanted to take.

“Fuck,” Ellie cursed under her breath as she rushed towards the building her literature seminar was in. “I’m going to be so late.” She was practically cursing herself for waking up so late that morning, her bed seeming much more welcoming than the professor who had 1 star on ‘rate my professors.’ She knew she had fucked up, but at this moment she didn’t really care.

As she made her way down the chestnut lined hallway, she frantically checked the door numbers on each door, cursing each time the door number didn’t align with the one she was supposed to be in. When she did find her classroom at the end of the hallway, she had to steady herself with a few deep breaths before entering. Throughout all of this, however, one thought rang clear through her mind: Fuck Cat.

Ellie never really liked to refer to herself as heartbroken, but that was the nicest way she could put the state that Cat had left her in. Ellie always knew she liked girls and while she had many crushes, and a few kisses, Cat was her first real girlfriend. She was the first person to hold Ellie’s hand in public, post lame birthday posts on Instagram, and the first person to give her an orgasm. But if she was being really honest with herself, her first orgasm belonged to her own hand.

Cat had served as a turning point in Ellie’s life and up until this point she was almost certain that she had been in love with her. Almost. There was always this sinking feeling that whatever feelings she had for the girl was most likely orchestrated by pure hormones. She couldn’t quite pinpoint what it was that made her feel that way, but there always seemed to be something missing from their relationship.

Little to Ellie’s knowledge, however, was that was just who Cat was. She made you feel like you were on top of the world, the only person in the universe who could cure her ills, and the only person who got her. She made you feel special, and at the time, that was exactly what Ellie was craving. She needed a person who looked at her like she aligned the stars, and that person was Cat.

Until it wasn’t. Quickly towards the end of the summer Cat got bored and all of the love notes Ellie had written her were quickly discarded within an hour of reading them. She continued to pull away until there was no trace of her left in Ellie’s life. To make matters worse, she broke up with Ellie over text, leaving her dazed and confused. There was nothing left for her to do except to run to Dina’s house and cry in her lap. She hated how pathetic she looked as Dina stroked her hair and shooed Jeese off with the flick of her hand. It was safe to say Ellie was completely over relationships.

Fuck Cat, she thought again, but decided that it being a thought wasn’t enough.

E: Fuck Cat.

D: yea fuck that bitch

Deciding that the text had done enough to calm her nerves, she pushed through the threshold into the classroom. She must’ve not realized how intimate of a class this was when she signed up for it because as she entered all ten of the people in the room now locked eyes with her, and the old man sitting at the front of the table threw her a disappointed look.

“Ellie Williams, I presume?” he questioned, looking at his roster in front of him.

“You do presume.” She awkwardly answered, only receiving a chuckle from a girl sitting at the far end of the table. Ellie looked up to see who it was that laughed at her poorly timed joke but just saw you trying to hide the smile on your face by pretending to write notes.

“You can sit at any open seat, I was just discussing the syllabus.” He told her, his tone sharp.

“Okay, thanks.” Ellie mumbled under her breath, moving to sit at the open seat next to you considering you seemed like you might be the friendliest person in this room. She quickly moved to get her notebook out but internally cursed herself out for the fifth time that day because she completely forgot her pencil case in her dorm. She decided to save herself the embarrassment of asking if anyone had a pen, so she just continued to ruffle through her bag even though she knew it wasn’t there.

“You looking for something?” you leaned over to whisper to her, still causing her to jump back slightly.

“Yea, a pen?” She whispered back, laughing under her breath to pretend like she wasn’t completely embarrassed right now.

“Here.” A black pen balanced in between your fingers as you offered it to her. She sheepishly thanked you before taking it, making sure your fingers didn’t touch.

“There will be one main assignment in this class as you can see on the syllabus.” Ellie, obviously not in her element, looked around at all the packets each person was holding. As if you could sense the nerves on her, you shoved your packet in between the both of you, pointing to the assignment the professor was discussing.

“It is a partner based project and since there are only ten of you I hope this won’t be an issue.” He continued on. “And as you can see it is worth 60% of your grade.” Fuck this, Ellie thought to herself yet again, and fuck Cat too, she added for good measure.

The rest of the 90 minute class went as well as you could imagine, Ellie only having to stop herself from falling asleep three times. When the class was over and she began to collect her things Ellie looked over to where you were stuffing your laptop into your backpack.

“Hey,” she managed to get out, her fingers fidgeting with her rings. “Would you want to be partners for the project?”

You let out a breath of relief smiling both to her and yourself. “I would love that actually.”

“Ok, good.” Ellie chuckled to herself about how nervous she was over something so small “I thought you might’ve thought I was like super unprepared or something since I was late and the pen.” Her eyes widened the pen. “Oh shit, your pen.” Ellie moved to take her backpack off and give back your pen but you abruptly stopped her by placing your hand on her forearm. Your hand right over the very spot Cat had tattooed.

“Keep it,” you offered her a genuine smile before handing your phone over to her “and put your number in here.”

Ellie may not have noticed it but she blushed. A part of her knew you were just being kind and you needed her number to work on the project but if this was any other setting this would be considered flirting. Ellie nervously took your phone in her hand and inserted her number and name with a little planet emoji next to it. When she handed the phone back to you she scanned your face for a reaction, smiling to herself when she saw your very own smile.

“Ellie,” you looked back up at her “nice name.” All Ellie could do was let the tips of her ears turn red as she thanked you. When you offered her your own name and she repeated it back to you, she liked the way it felt on her tongue. She wondered what you wou- No, she wasn’t doing this again.

“I’ll text you tonight about getting started.” You informed her, now slinging your own bag over your shoulder.

“Looking forward to it.” She stated simply, her own feet planted to the floor.

“I presume you are.” You replied with a giggle before turning around and leaving Ellie feeling fuzzy.

Fuck.

The rest of Ellie’s day was uneventful to say the least. She saw a few birds eating a sandwich and thought it was cute, but besides that (and you), her day was boring. She was hoping that this year would be different, that she would be miles ahead of where she was when she met Cat, but she knew she was just worse. She wanted anything, a rebound, a distraction to pull her mind off Cat but all she could do was stare at her ceiling and try not to cry. Or that’s what she was doing until her phone buzzed from it’s place on her stomach.

Y: hey, it’s me

E: Who's me?

Y: pen dealer, duh

E: I thought dealers were supposed to be more discreet.

Y: you know a lot about dealers?

E: I’ve seen a few movies.

Y: nothing is like the movies, be fr

Y: anyways, do you want to meet up to discuss the project tomorrow? we could meet at beans?

E: Yeah, sure. 10?

Y: sounds good, bring cash

E: For? I use apple pay.

Y: for the pens… it was a joke nvm

E: Dumb joke.

The next morning Ellie had to drag herself out of bed so she wouldn’t be late to meet you. She groaned as she watched her roommate sleeping peacefully in her bed while she so desperately wished it could be her. For some reason that she couldn’t place, Ellie found herself smoothing down her hair and checking her teeth in the mirror. She even sprayed some perfume before she left, coughing as she accidentally inhaled some of the liquid. Why was she doing this again?

She saw you through the window of the coffee shop, leaned over your computer screen lost in thought. You tucked your pen between your lips and Ellie couldn’t help but feel like a freak staring at you from the other side. You looked so at peace with your hair tied up and your eyes carefully scanning the screen. Ellie wondered what it would feel like to not have a million things going through your mind at once.

When she approached you she made a mental note of how your eyes lit up when you saw her. You had known her for a second and you had already looked at her with more adoration that Cat did towards the end of their relationship.

“Hey, customer.” You joked, as you watched Ellie sit down across from you.

“You don’t know how to let a joke die, do you?” She questioned jokingly, a warm feeling in both her face and her chest.

“I do not.” You said matter of factly.

The two of you discussed the project, throwing in occasional conversation and jokes when the material got too daunting. After about an hour had passed and the two of you were already feeling burnt out, Ellie suggested you take a walk around campus to “get some fresh air” and “clear your heads.” In reality, she was already growing tired of this project and just wanted to hear your voice ramble on about something other than American Literature.

It was a cool day, and the slight breeze caused both you and Ellie to squint the entire time. There was something so calm about the energy between the two of you. It wasn’t passionate or overwhelming like it was with Cat, but comforting. It was lulling Ellie into a sense of security, but she knew it couldn’t last long.

“Where are you from?” Ellie spoke up. “Did you grow up around here?”

“Close-ish, I guess.” You answered. “I’m from a town north called Star Valley.”

“Oh shit, you’re right by Jackson.” Ellie exclaimed.

“Yea, you’re from Jackson?” The idea that you too lived this close and this was your first time meeting almost seemed criminal to Ellie.

“Yeah, me and my friends grew up there. I’m originally from Boston, though, I moved there with my..” You gave her time to speak, it being painfully obvious she was going to have trouble explaining the situation. “Like my dad? He’s not really my dad, he’s just Joel.” She decided to dumb down her complicated relationship with him for the sake of time. You, however, did not try to get any information out of her, or immediately try to get her to be vulnerable with her like Cat did at the beginning of the relationship. You just smiled at her and continued on with the conversation.

Ellie liked this. She liked being able to have a conversation with a pretty girl that didn’t make her feel like she was tearing herself open just to bond with you. You two were just bonding in the simplest way people could. The sick and sinister part of her, however, was telling her to leave immediately. To avoid the trouble that another heartbreak would bring her.

That part of her was starting to win over slowly as she remembered the promise she made to herself. She quickly excused herself and told you she would text you about meeting up again to work on the project. Her brain was telling her run, run, run, but she could tell you were still standing there staring as she walked away towards the direction of her building.

Later that night, after a cool shower and a few hits of her pen, Ellie found herself ranting to Dina over text again.

E: I’m so fucked.

D: what???

E: I’m working with this really hot girl on a project for one of my classes and today we were walking together and it all seemed normal, like toooo normal, so I left. Like I no joke was like “Bye” mid conversation and LEFT HER THERE. What is wrong with me?

D: what happened to ‘i’m never talking to another girl again’?

E: I’m not.

D: …

E: I’M NOT.

E: IT DOESN'T EVEN MATTER SHE PROBABLY THINKS I’M A FREAK FOR RUNNING AWAY TODAY

D: true

E: ?????

D: idk why you would do that so i’m not going to lie to you

D: i would think you are a freak

E: Ok, fuck you.

D: what does she look like?

E: Hot.

D: oh yes thank you for painting such a vivid picture

D: SEND A PICTURE YOU FREAK

E: You are so mean to me.

Ellie felt the need for validation so she did what any normal person would in that situation: she went to instagram and typed in your full name. To her surprise, there you were, smiling as bright as the sun in your profile picture. Ellie suddenly felt like a kid again scanning through your photos, blushing and smiling to herself as she looked at you, losing focus of her original motive. She didn’t realize how far she had scrolled down until she was stopped by the sight of a familiar face. In a post dated over a year ago it was you kissing another girl.

And that girl was Cat.

#ellie williams #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams smut #ellie williams tlou #ellie williams x reader smut #ellie williams the last of us #ellie williams tlou2 #ellie williams fanfiction #ellie williams fanfic #ellie williams fan fic #ellie williams x female reader #ellie williams x you #ellie williams imagine #ellie williams oneshot #modern!ellie williams #college!ellie williams #ellie williams one shot

2K notes · View notes

sugar-petals · 2 years

Text

𝖘𝖚𝖇!NCT ; { 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚍 𝚐𝚊𝚖𝚎 𝚜𝚚𝚞𝚊𝚍 | 18+}

[ # 𝚝𝚊𝚐𝚜. ] domme/sub. oral sex. kinks. toys. breath play. semi-public sex.

⟨ AUTHOR’S NOTE. ❌ here’s to a 9-part hc, this time it’s the neos! 5k words total — at this point, i might just name my blog oral fixation central instead of pretty boy central. i picked members who i thought would suit the scenario best, from power bottoms to innocent subs: pick your preference from the little ‘feat’ list below ⬇︎ and if you like what i do: interact and/or reblog ♥︎ enjoy! x

[ + PAIRINGS.] crop top!mark, shy!taeyong, poly soft sub!shotaro, hard sub!yuta, experienced!jungwoo, tease!yangyang, trophy bf!xiaojun, service sub!johnny, pro!ten x femdom!reader respectively

| masterlist |

| read it on ao3 |

⇢ MARK 마크 - All about the eye contact while hugging your thighs. You’re comfortably reclined, playing with his soft flowy bangs. His shampoo smells so. Fricking. Good. He’s kneeling there, ass up, one hell of a sight. Why have one nice thing when you could have two at once? Mark eating your cake, you can check out his cake — and spank it later — it’s a win-win. Mark is the kind of guy who blurts out a thousand thoughts per minute, but when he eats you out, the laser focus he’s known for when rapping returns to its full glory. As if he could read your wants and wishes out of your gaze. If you want clit kisses, you get them. Still, Mark often confuses himself in typical style („Hold on, hold on! The towel goes here below, wait, I got it wrong!“), but! He is not confused by you. It’s more about figuring out his technique. Was more cautious at the beginning already, however not because he thought you were unapproachable or mysterious. Mark loves you very much and thinks you’re beyond hilarious. Which is why eating you out is constantly interrupted by mutual laughing fits, no surprise there. His tunnel vision can only last for so long! You make your boyfriend cry tears by making funny faces. He’s caught off guard. It’s good to lighten the mood. Being funnier than Mark is hard to pull off, which makes it even more rewarding to make his face glow from heat, thigh squeezing, and grinning. One hand on his cheek if you can reach, the other at the back of his neck. Mark has the softest peach fuzz on his nape, so satisfying to stroke. What starts out hasty or confused turns into comfy relaxation and trust, Mark knows how much it soothes you.

One scenario became his and your definite favorite. Mark got his driving license, parked in front of your home, honked, and had the audacity to sit there behind the steering wheel with a purple crop top on such a fine evening. Horny and intrigued immediately, all you did was stare during your drive to the take-out spot you like so very much. His hair had gotten pretty long, it was so cute. But Mark’s body was just as inviting, you wanted to touch and ravage and wreck him so damn badly. Mark barely made it halfway through the city that you asked him to drive off the main street. Innocent mind he is, your baby assumed you knew a shortcut through the traffic. Mark winds up stopping the car incredulously somewhere close to an empty laundromat store, this area of the city was fast asleep and abandoned. When you whispered you wanted to fuck him, Mark’s jaw simply dropped. A perfect exercise for what was about to— come. Perfectly sat on his face, you were deepthroating a whiny Mark laying on the backseat seven minutes later, sucking him off in a proper rhythm, seamless, with Mark nipping and dipping his way into your heart from behind. Mark was ready to die fulfilled by getting crushed. He came down your throat so fast, you had to wait until you could ride him hard: A perfect opportunity to enjoy some more chaotic rapper tongue action before, and moaning out loud when you came on his face. Since you were only getting started but Mark was dizzy with love, you took matters into your own hands and went for the ride of your lives.

read it on ao3

⇢ TAEYONG 태용 - Insecure and shifty-eyed at first, both hands trembling in the pockets of his grey hoodie. Leader Taeyong mode: Disengage. Listening well is his guideline here, he relies on bits of praise and your instructions („More to the left — yes… feels good“) to know what works. Sub training is the word. Since he’s more of an intuitive lover who prefers not to jump right into it, Taeyong will build the scenario rather carefully with your orders in mind. Morning, noon, or night, doesn’t matter. The time spent gearing up, arranging his room with the right lights and a movie to watch first, the mood at the moment, that’s time well-spent. Impressionable Taeyong is a perfectionist of staging something in every sense of the word. His tendency for theatrics and hot as fuck eyebrow expressions extends to licking you up when his new mixtape plays. Even when he’s fucked-out from the day, he still reserves this energy for his one and only. Getting better and to the point as he progresses is always the bar. The hoodie stays on. The inhibitions come off. Once he gets going and the playlist switches to Baekhyun, Taeyong sucks your clit like it’s your birthday. You reach the point of no return in one minute flat no matter how slow or fast he goes. Your sweet sloppy sub is well aware where the most sensitive nerve endings are and caters to your every throbbing, pulsing, and twitching of the legs. And if you’re insatiable, horny at 7 in the morning again, Taeyong will drop everything he does and climbs back into your bed to play with your wetness at the tips of his fingers, sucking them rigorously like the true cumslut he is. The scent of his crisp aftershave will make you cum in no time, he smells so fucking good and masculine. This handsome man’s all yours.

Recently figured out how mommy cums as soon as he moans her name. So, he has to use it diligently, not too early, not excessively. You help him place his hands on the outer point of your hips, use his bubbling spit as lube, and show your boo how to angle his glorious jaw. Sooner or later, he almost looks like he’s posing in an expensive photoshoot, that’s how physical he is. Subspace is always just around the corner, so you make a habit of reassuring him that he sucks you off right, that you love this way of pleasure, that he’s good at it. Which is no lie. His tongue is flexible and versatile, to say the very least. And his room isn’t the only place where your little encounter goes down. Taeyong once drove you out to see his old school — you both just wanted to revisit the empty building for some memories. Taeyong got nostalgic, plus he loves to show you forgotten aspects of his life that few other people know. The sports facilities in particular. But eventually, you pressed Taeyong against a locker, heavily made out, and within a blink of his pretty doe eyes, his head was between your legs on an old bench. Your dirty talk was off the fucking charts. The pet names you were peppering him with, too. Three minutes after you hit the peak, Taeyong gladly heard the janitor’s keys click in a close-by room, so you just wound up hiding behind some trees of the school’s baseball field. Out of breath, the two of you. Jeez, did he dress you in record time, and jumped up, and showed you the door out. Those reflexes. While you wait for the janitor to leave, a very amused Taeyong shows you pictures of himself when he was enrolled on his phone… as if he didn’t swallow your every drop just minutes earlier. Yeah, he’s fascinating.

read it on ao3

⇢ SHOTARO 쇼타로 - Kissy lips, kissy face. Squeals with absolute joy when you offer him to have a go — don’t underestimate how much he worships your body. And how much he loves sex, long as it’s not too rough. Shotaro doesn’t like hard subbing, gentle femdom sounds more like it. He won’t risk anything… yet. Wait one or two years and he might as well be super freaky. Until then, no experiments, Yuta’s kinky influence has not corrupted him, but he won’t stop to take a breather either. The perfect mix of commitment and flirt, batting his puppy eyes at you constantly with a very careful mouth at work. Shotaro’s friendly impression is not going to be blown away all of a sudden, that’s not even reserved for moaning his soul out when you peg him. The only time the sweet smile wanes is when your baby feels like you’re not into it — before you even voice it to him. Shotaro is concerned concerned. „Wait! Should I do it differently?“ is the panicked response, and you cool him down for a solid minute with head pats. Making mistakes is what he fears most: Looking pathetic, degraded, embarrassed and unskilled. Needless to say, he’s not the type of submissive who likes humiliation, more points to soft subbing. You say, you’re Shotaro. How could you go wrong. You couldn’t look awful if you tried. Although `going with the flow´ is a washed-out phrase that’s far too simple as a motto, a little bit of calm and laissez-faire really works for him. Not interrupting himself, not checking if absolutely everything is done right, but going ahead and just working his tongue to get some feedback later.

Where he clearly excels is a polyamorous dynamic, romantic and/or sexual: Hear me out. Naturally, he needs no experience with it. He fits right into the mix, acting as a mediator and mood-maker between three parties. Three is good, although four or five is too much for Shotaro to handle, even if the pairs kind of split into couple units within one room. Like two here, three there, or something like that. It’s better to focus and galvanize all the attention on you without distractions or further chaos that would just make the situation uncomfortable. So, three it is. Not a gangbang, just a triad, and if it’s two girls he’ll pleasure at once, he’s right at home. Shotaro is so amicable, his winning smile could put anyone at ease. As I said, despite his lack of experience, he’s a natural. One girl gets to relish his gentle fingers circling and rubbing, the other girl will see his mouth do wonders at the same time. Actually, Shotaro is more confident with a third party around, it’s puzzling. Until you remember he’s part of frickin’ NCT: Their collective buzzing hive mind has likely programmed every member to be good at poly should they choose to try it — don’t ask why, just enjoy. Being around so many people made Shotaro a little awkward in a one-on-one setting, which doesn’t diminish his affection for his main partner, mind you. But you can definitely tell he thrives on poly dynamics, it feels like protection to him. Shotaro’s number one prowess of being able to please will come through immediately, and he’ll do anything to set up the room as romantically as possible. Scented candles, warm blankets, music. Everyone feels secure, and it’s a night you’ll ask to repeat soon. He’s the absolute sweetest, I know.

read it on ao3

⇢ YUTA 유타 - Enjoys you spitting on him beforehand. Properly. Degradingly, with no hesitation, anywhere across his face. Wastes no time submitting to your sadistic, tormenting deeds. Any viable spot in your living space will serve as a theatre for a great scene. Even the cold basement: You, facing any wall standing, Yuta chained and squatted between your legs to eat his meal from behind-below, begging to be crushed, suffocated. Rest assured you’ll feel warmed up in just two minutes. Nastiest groans between loud slurping noises ever. Moves his head side to side a whole lot. Other people around? „Don’t care“ — Yuta wants everyone to know he pleasures your clit superbly well. Likes, wants, craves the aid of ultra-fancy battery toys. Where’s the excitement, the literal buzz? He’s not happy if you don’t get one hell of a show, whipped cream included (yes, his secret weapon). And, you know… him wearing a red rope harness, even thin heels, hard to balance on as the extra challenge. Dressed for the occasion. Always knows, observes, notices when you love it and when you don’t, or if you think some technique is just eh, mediocre, maybe „time for an upgrade“. The upgrade is more tongue-flicking, by the way. Mister Quick & Sloppy knows what’s good. Yuta shows up carrying a little vibrator collection 70% of the time, some very handy electrical friends that he’s gonna use one after the other while you can just relax. Why just one toy when you could have even more sensations? Alternating with his energetic tongue, it’s an interesting method mix, freaky and experimental. So much more intense, and new. They didn’t lie when they said Yuta had vibes. The things he’s smuggled through crowded hotel lobbies with a stone-cold face just to get you off. And: The toys he ordered online, where Taeyong picked up the package, so Yuta lied it was just another boring game he bought to pass the time.

Looks at you very intensely with his head between your legs, and you wink back by habit. It actually flusters him profusely. Don’t underestimate Yuta’s ability to become extremely shy, this man has such a soft spot for his domme. Especially after she destroyed him totally… he loves it, going past his limits all the time. A cane is all you need to break him, only to get all the head you want with Yuta crying. Hard and mischievous shell, soft and whimpery core. One of the best pleasers, knows you inside out. Yuta has his intricately detailed knowledge about the ladies down. Plus his power bottom tendencies equal the amounts of sheer masochism he possesses: Mercilessly smack him across the face between streaks of sucking, right after he catches a breath, and he will be yours. Yuta will plead you to do it again and again. Never cared about shallow orgasms, wants to make you cum for real, it’s the same with him wanting to scream. Wishes there was a way for you to choke him out while he’s doing down on you, but your hands would reach him awkwardly, preferring to pull on his hair anyway: So he just clamps down on his own neck with one hand, circling your nipples with his spit-covered fingers using the other hand, that fucking perv. That Yuta is crazy you already know, but that he likes to pile on several sex techniques at once is a revelation. That he has the skills to do it is not. Sex god. Your nasty boy deserves to be ruined.

read it on ao3

⇢ JUNGWOO 정우 - Prince of chapstick, he feels super smooth. The face, the same. So soft. The prettiest. Prettiest boy to ever pretty. Long as it’s a chill environment and it’s mostly vanilla, he’s down for anything, your goofy sweetheart. Don’t laugh, you could even put on a random Sunday soccer match on his laptop. If there’s no intense penalty shootout and it’s a little monotonous, both teams equally strong so nothing really happens, that’s perfect as a relaxing backdrop with all the occasional commentary and fan chants, volume turned down by 80%. It would sound weird with any other guy, but Jungwoo makes it work. It could be any sports event, in fact. Ice hockey, billiards, whatever. Or music. Or him wearing a silky jersey himself while he goes down on you, his sporty side is such a turn-on. But no stress, no edge, just being sweet together and flirting a lot. He’s cute and hot and kind at once — the amount of facial expressions you’ll see is astounding. Likes the occasional deeper dive if you know what I mean, though not as in, ambushing you with crazy tongue twisters and whatnot. Deliberate is the word. Is not content staying all too superficial or messy, it has to be rhythmical and make sense, making you comfortable. You thought he would be chaotic, but Jungwoo knows exactly what to do, how to dip, so you don’t worry. Except that you’re an immensely possessive domme behind a generous exterior — with eagle eyes, for that matter.

Since your lil’ pup acts like he has done it before a couple times, and Jungwoo confirms he has experience, you feel a bit jealous and even go on bantering. „Enjoyed it?“ Yes, even if you wish you weren’t, you’re jelly. Jungwoo reacts with a sheepish and embarrassed face, he doesn’t want to spill the beans. What’s done is done, he protects the privacy of his exes, evades questions. You eventually calm yourself to take it easy, it’s none of your biz, although saying his past is his past doesn’t really work as a catchphrase for you: You have to make it crystal clear, have him close in, make him say „I am“ when you ask „are you mine, then?“ Despite his seductive come-hither gaze being a masterclass and his humor being outrageous, Jungwoo is a surprisingly patient lover, hating to just rush it or be inaccurate with his plush tongue. You can feel his adoration. And he’s upbeat. A reassuring smile makes your day, it helps you rid yourself off the stress. Every word you say is appreciated. He hates when someone walks all over their partner, it just isn’t right to him. Listening is more important. Jungwoo hates you being pent up, hates you worried or preoccupied. At work, he can deal with himself. At home, he will vent quickly when there’s a bigger problem, but he’d rather tune into you first. He’d do anything to make you feel like you got rid of your problems, he’s your escapist fantasy turned real. Jungwoo has no problem being considered just that. In fact, he wants it, knowing you can take it out on him in gentle ways: Hands in his soft blonde hair, swaying your hips, cumming when he kisses you.

read it on ao3

⇢ YANGYANG 양양 - Eating you out as his signature move? Well, well. Yes and no. Because seemingly, he does anything but: At first. It’s 99% endless teasing everywhere else on your body. Until, completely on edge, you guide his shoulders and have him get to work. With permission, of course, knowing he enjoys it. You wouldn’t hurt this cutie at all costs, though he likes his head controlled by you like this to begin with. So don’t worry too much, he isn’t made of cotton candy, even if his hair color sometimes suggests that. Ironically, it’s the other way around. He wants to taste your cotton candy. With your hands around his temples, holding him in place. Which makes for a sexy POV from both of your positions. Yangyang is working hard, why is he still so immensely eager, how much energy does he even have? It’s admirable how he can tease your body for so long with ghosting kisses and suggestive eye contact. Yangyang being the master of stamina might come as a surprise, but you know how it goes with Libra men. Pleasers till the end of time. That’s exactly why he indulges you so much in prep. Edging is his thing, though you tend to take back control by cussing him out for licking your ankles like a maniac. „What are you, a deprived Victorian man? You sexy fucking sucker, you, God damn…“ Insults make him squeal and laugh, and soon he’s back to the main event, anyway.

Now seriously, why does the cutie trail off so much? Which, granted, makes you even hornier. Propped onto your couch, Yangyang is humming and licking your thighs with that seductive, way too infuriating grin. Even munching on them when he’s extra cocky, up until you say you’ll fucking spank his soul out if he keeps on smiling like a devil. You’ll mark him up at full capacity, slap his butt, pinch his nose, swear you’ll tickle him until he taps out. But kinky Yangyang is not stopped by any threat of punishment whatsoever. What are you gonna do, smack his ass and hope he stops nibbling on your legs for good? If anything, he gets even more riled up and ready to stimulate you even more. Shit, your body’s on fire from all the attention it gets. So, good luck with this sheer untamable brat. He kisses your belly, sucks on your chest at random. Your fingers, too. The neck. The entire palette. Even the fucking ears. Yuta would be proud of Yangyang’s utter depravity. Little did you know it’s all a tastemaker. In your world, he’s increasing the suspense. In his world, he’s courting you, paying attention to all body parts, showing off what he can do with his lips. Oral sex? Nope, kissing first! Holy fuck, he’s absolutely fucking peppering you. You thought Yangyang was too intimidated to go down on you and delayed it, turns out you misunderstood. Guy is just the king of foreplay. And out of all head squad members? Surprise! His oral fixation is the most unruly and developed.

read it on ao3

⇢ XIAOJUN 샤오쥔 - Okay, prepare yourselves. Xiaojun is a little extra with those kind of things, to say the least. Not kinky, just particular. In fact, he is the type to use his whole damn face. Yep. Very deliberately, slow-mo, so you can see and feel everything. Yes, chin and all. His entire technique would appear lazy, uncoordinated and weird to an outsider, but from your perspective, he’s just nasty, he’s giving it his all: Which is exactly what you like. Xiaojun knows that you’re obsessed with the beauty of his otherwordly features from outer space, and he’s always generous with it — „I’m yours, that’s why“. So why not give it a shot, his mouth can only do so much! Does Xiaojun look down on anyone who sticks to the basics? Probably not, he’s too busy in his own relationship. Being perfect, being hot, being all you need, he goes the extra mile for everything. And that happens to include cunnilingus. The cheekbones, the nose, the forehead, even… You get to feel it, too, not just the lips doing their thing. He’s brave, he’s naughty, he’s sensual all at once. Wants you all over him, after all. Slathered up in your wetness, is this Xiaojun’s new makeup routine? It sure looks like it. The man is glowing for all the right reasons.

There is a bit of vanity in his style. He’s your designated trophy boyfriend, after all. Gotta look and act the part, doesn’t he. Swipe his hair back while he licks you, put up mirrors for sexy time, doll himself up beforehand with soft and pretty clothes, even a few necklaces. No mediocre. Xiaojun is like Narcissus between your legs, but really, he’s just conscious of how he comes across: And who can blame him. That’s not a boyfriend. That’s a masterpiece. Xiaojun doesn’t need beauty standards, they need him! Few people can handle his awesomeness. Knowing you want his body, his fucking soul, he is all the more eager to satisfy your heated desires with no regard to form: Come as you are. Your PJs, work or uni clothes, naked, near-naked, whatever. He’s the one to look at. Xiaojun puts great emphasis in slow-paced presentation that matches some tender music in the background. It could go on for hours if you wanted. Dejun could do the juiciest and unusual things while a ballad is playing in the background, but you’re into it. Because it’s not torturously done, but well aware that you think he’s stunningly handsome, so he’ll indulge you. Looks good in any position, as one would expect. Enjoys it if you sit on him lots because he likes to be below, this overpowering angle. The same idea applies here: Torturously slow is the key. You’re a strict and controlled domme, that suits him the very best.

read it on ao3

⇢ JOHNNY 쟈니 - Sassy, sassy boy. Talks a lot at the beginning, 100k words friends to lovers. Is this Youtube? Johnny needs to know exactly what you want and how he can achieve it. Fair enough, he wants the juicy intel, all of your boundaries and soft limits, your ideas, your sweet spots, your no-gos and best ways to make you comfortable. And hey, that’s a smart and normal thing to do: He just does it all at once, like an essay. Wow. You can tell he thought about everything and wondered about everything. A caring boyfriend, if you think of it. The whole shebang is kind of cute. Johnny has no business being ignorant; nor does he like to disappoint his girlfriend. He already caught your attention with his tight shirt, in fact, he distracted you while you were going through your phone, so now he, um, takes responsibility for his banging body being so hot. „Do you want any snacks before, something to drink? Probably some water, right. Wait a minute, I’ll get it for you. Do you want warm water or cold water? Okay, cold, right. With a slice of lemon or without? Should we turn on the TV or some music? Which blanket do you prefer today, the lighter one or the heavy-duty?“

On it goes, it’s the service sub in him. This is like fucking Hotel Johnny Seo. He wants to be like a personal butler to you, except that said butler has some impressive dancer glutes and no suit on. Johnny really does leave nothing to chance and you appreciate it: Circumspect, as ever, and it’s important to be comfy before getting down to business. Johnny knows it always makes a difference when you’re warm and hydrated, so he keeps on asking questions to make sure it’s all set. But once he is engrossed, lips on your labia… the opposite is true. Why does he stop talking out of literal nowhere, what on earth is going on. Johnny’s dead silent, focused, in a different mindset. Unrecognizable. He barely even moves his body, even if there’s a lot to move indeed. God, is he fucking tall — a bit difficult to drape and position himself on the sheets, but he’ll manage. Kind of folding himself in half will do the trick. You already blew his literal back out with your strap the day before, so his spine’s like jelly anyway: Bending, not a problem. Once he kneels properly, it’s all tunnel vision. Although to be fair, he moans every now and then — which is very stimulating, to say the very least. Puts his spectacular lips to good use and, if he’s honest, wants to be „nothing but a sex toy“ (his words, verbatim!) that you can bend around to your delights. You were kind of confused by what he meant, so Johnny explained it. The point is that you can adjust him however you like and he’s there to give you a good time.

read it on ao3

⇢ ten 텐 - Red alert, the final boss is here. Let's make tonight your birthday. Ten’s piping hot sexual style puts any existing man, no matter how experienced, to a literal devastating shame. Because he has what? The flavor. It’s exceedingly difficult to put his energy into fitting words. Similar to Yuta, he flaunts some seriously rapid flicking tongue movements, but knows when to slow it down for a minute: Nuance! It’s exactly what does the trick. Despite his quick and accurate manner, he won’t overstimulate or overtake you. Overtaking in a sense of, being faster than the pleasure can arrive, which is a mistake he knows is frequently committed. Ten knows that going too hard doesn’t feel good, so he refrains from going on for a second round right away especially. „Fifteen minutes rest is due,“ is what he’ll say, laying down face to face on his side with you. Presenting his cute puffy lips, and also for a chance to look him in the eyes properly. Those cat eyes. They’re magnetic. After enough tension builds and you’re impatient, Ten dives off between your thighs again. Patience (with stamina) is a virtue and he has it. Paired with the most graphic dirty talk you’ve ever heard, Ten is fully in his element, hands in the right places, hair falling the right way, lips promptly sucking you up. If you know his Instagram, you know which bedroom eyes will await you. On the majority of days, Ten is the type who will crawl up to you from the edge of the bed like a feline. You don’t know what’s first to touch. Grab his ass? Cup his face? Pinch his waist? Fuck it, just do everything at once.

Not a fan of 69, he’ll dedicate himself fully to you. Twisting himself around is his job on stage, but he’s remarkably still once chest down in bed. Or the edge of the bathtub, whatever you fancy. Few angles are too awkward for ten. Talk about bathroom sex: He’s probably the only person on earth who mastered giving head in the shower. Even without a mat or towel under his knees, which is crazy. He stays stable as if by sheer magic, the floor being painfully hard and slippery doesn’t bother him, though you insist he use at least a small towel to kneel on when it’s not spontaneous oral. Ten is only focused on his task, nothing else fazes him. He trusts you with the temperature control, and if he’s getting waterboarded from above with the shower on? Then he’s getting waterboarded. Ten won’t care. He’s the goat, he knows he can breathe somehow, and he doesn’t want you getting cold — „just turn the valve, honey“. You often take precautions and turn on the bathroom heating way before, but Ten insists on his ways and can clearly see your goosebumps. Your right leg over your shoulder, your boyfriend eats you out from below with the water stream trailing right over his face. The divine baptism! You can squeeze, grind, and fuck his face stupid in the most erratic thrusts on the bathroom carpet ten minutes later for a solid round two. He wants to be completely at your mercy, laying there on his back, dripping wet long dark hair, getting you off hands-free. This guy lets you do anything. Any-fucking-thing. Ten is a legend.

read it on ao3

// FINAL NOTE. leave some feedback if you liked it 🍒 and for more content like this, browse my rec blog’s specifically dedicated sub!nct tag. have fun! 🙌

| masterlist |

similar posts: multi version /// bts version /// exo version

1K notes · View notes

stevetown · 2 years

Text

A Tumblr Quick Start Guide

A year ago, I realized that every time I logged onto Twitter, I felt my blood pressure rise. It's a platform that runs on anger and outrage, and I wanted someplace better to spend my screen time. In my almost-year on Tumblr, I now realize I log on here and get one or two good laughs every time I check my dashboard.

Tumblr has given me a lot lately, but it is a bit different than other platforms. I'd like to give back a little and provide a quick-start guide on how being new to Tumblr worked for me.

Finding Things to Follow

The biggest thing I had to get used to was realizing that on Tumblr, you don't necessarily follow people or celebrities or politicians. You follow your interests. In fact, it's pretty common to follow only strangers that post things you like. That can make your empty dash daunting to fill! Let's fill it with things you love and make you happy.

Make a list, mental or otherwise, of things you're interested in. Be both broad and specific! Board Games. Magic The Gathering. Supernatural. Marvel. Video Games. 8-Bit. Urban planning. Any and all things that you like!

Pick one of your interests and search for that tag. Flip between "Latest" and "Top" and browse around to see what kind of content is in that tag. You'll notice images, art, gif sets, TikToks, videos, essays - all sorts of things!

If you see a lot of things you like, cool! Click the button to Follow that tag if you want to keep up to date on it and find things later (we'll come back to this).

If you see a post you love, check out who posted or reblogged it. Scroll around on their blog. Do they post similar stuff? Are there other things you like here? Are they posting often? If you like what they post, follow the blog! Congrats, you've followed your first blog!

Take some time and check out some other tags and follow the same process - follow tags you like and blogs you might be interested in. It's not possible to over-follow! You can always curate your list later. This isn't Twitter - no one cares if you unfollow someone. Find what makes you happy.

Go back to your main dashboard - how are things looking? Filled with things you're interested in? Excellent. If things don't work for you, don't be afraid to unfollow blogs.

Want to follow more blogs? New episode of Andor drop? Go to the "Your Tags" header and scroll around to find some more juicy content. Check out blogs you like, follow 'em if you like em, rinse and repeat! That's curating your dash!

Your Blog is Your House

Okay, so you have a dashboard of content that you like - but what do you do with it all? Someone once described a Tumblr blog to me like your little house that you can fill with all the things you like. There is no rhyme or reason, and you don't need an excuse to reblog something other than the fact that you liked it!

If you see something you like, reblog it! To me, I reblog things when I say "I like this and I want it to live in my house so other people can see it when they come visit"

Reblogging is like passing a message along to other people. You can just reblog it on its own to amplify it, or you can add your own tags, or if you have a funny reaction gif/thought/video/thousand-word-essay, add to it when you reblog!

Use tags. People actually find posts through tags here. Use them to help people discover that really cool reblog you found! You can also search for tags on specific blogs. This makes them great for categorizing posts on your own blog. For example, I use #2022 Game Journal when I blog about whatever game I'm playing so I can do a year-end review later and find all the posts later.

Like things too. Likes don't amplify posts, but they're nice to let a poster know you appreciated it! I also use likes a bookmark. Sometimes I don't have time to watch that TikTok, so I'll like it as a reminder to come back to it later.

Be Weird. You can have sideblogs to hold more specific content, but don't be afraid to just scoop up anything you like and put it in your house! Reblogging is how content gets passed around.

Random Blog Tips

Wow nice job, your blog's looking great! Before you know it, someone will find it, check out your posts, and maybe give you a follow if they like what you've made or what your reblog! The last thing I'll touch on here are some nitty-gritty tips that can help you think about all the meta stuff about Tumblr:

Tumblr is the most anonymous social media platform. No one has to know who you are. Take advantage of all the privacy options.

You can also hide likes and who you follow from public view - that's no one else's business! Turn off asks too if you want.

Play around with your settings in general - there are lots of customization options and other dash tabs that you can use to find new content. You can also turn on timestamps so you know if a post you see is a "heritage post," as they say. Content is evergreen here and I personally like to see that in action.

You can filter and hide tags that you don't want to see.

Just block people liberally, it's cool.

You can pay to remove ads (nice), but you can also leave the option to see Blazed posts on. Blazed posts are ones that people pay for impressions for - and any post can be Blazed. The kicker is, there's no ad targeting. It can be quite funny or quite annoying depending on what you want.

When viewing the notes on a post, you'll see comments, reblogs, and likes. For the reblogs section, I like to filter by "Comments only" to find what people have added to the post.

Like all social media sites, there are dark corners here. I think Tumblr more than most puts you in control to curate your Dashboard to only see what you want. Block a user, hide a post, and move on.

That should be quite enough to get started! Tumblr can take a little more time to "get" compared to other social media platforms (and get in on the long-running jokes!), but trust me, after a week, you'll notice the difference between checking your Tumblr dashboard and checking your Twitter timeline.

Your blood pressure will thank you.

#tumblr #twitter #twitter refugees #tips #getting started

2K notes · View notes

roosteraloha · 8 months

Text

infirmarian

jake seresin x reader

wc - approx 7.2k

warnings - angst, general discussion of sickness, description of vomit/throwing up, brief description of panic attacks.

disclaimer - ANY BLANK/AGELESS BLOGS WILL BE BLOCKED!! I also DO NOT give permission for any of my works to be copied, shared, compiled, translated or posted onto other sites!!

a/n - this is wrote itself. being chronically in pain sucks, sorry it took so long to get out, been the longest flare up of my life :(

reblogs & comments are greatly appreciated!!

A few days had passed since Jake had received any communication from you, you’d have your schedule rammed full of new work projects and meetings, not leaving much time for a social life, at least the kind that you longed for. This wasn’t something uncommon, Jake himself had a hectic day to day schedule, and the addition of your new work responsibilities was something that neither of you had enough to fully consider the amount of time that you’d have left to share with each other.

Fresh off an eight week deployment, Jake was eager to spend time with you however he could, swallowing down the bitter taste of disappointment that he came home to you being far busier than you’d let on in your limited communication. With only a few weeks left before you’d get back to your usual schedule, you had gotten to the point of longing for Jake’s company too. Eight weeks having been too long to not be able to hug him and snuggle up to him after another draining and exhausting day.

Jake had been home for close to two weeks when he started to see signs that you weren’t doing too well. You were overworking yourself again, and there were tell-tale signs that you were about to get sick. Something that you would never admit, choosing to deny the facts, even when you’re exhausted and tucked in bed with a fever.

Slipping his key into the lock, Jake frowns. The door is already unlocked. This normally wouldn’t be a cause for concern, but today, Jake hadn’t expected you to be home already. You were meant to be at work, at least that was what you had told him in between many incessant kisses this morning as Jake got himself ready. So he could have got confused, too distracted by the beauty he had in his bed, not that he would ever complain about your company.

Tossing his keys onto the hall table, Jake calls out to you. He has a small smile flickering on his lips, Jake could get used to this. It felt nice to have someone to come home too, it felt right. Wandering down the hall, Jake peers into the living room, face lighting up when he sees you curled up on the couch, typing away on your laptop.

Coming up behind you, he places a soft kiss on the top of your head. You had a rule about Jake coming home after flying, he would reek of jet fuel, and while that had slowly become a comforting part of your life, mainly because it reminded you of him, it was a smell that permeated fabrics. There was one incident with a throw blanket, luckily one you didn’t like, Jake had used it one day after a particularly tough day in training, only for you to pick up the next day and the smell was so strong, it may as well have been a rag for him to use on preflight checks. Weeks had passed and no matter how many times you washed it, the smell remained. Now, it was that Jake would shower before leaving base and then change as soon as he got home.

Quickly changing into some sweatpants, Jake joins on the couch, legs outstretched onto the sectional, an arm loosely thrown around your shoulders to pull you into him. Jake eyebrows furrow when he makes contact with your skin. You normally ran cold, hence the otherwise insane amount of blankets and oversized hoodies that you owned, but your skin was burning under Jake’s touch.

He shifts to get a better look at you, your cheeks are flushed, a light sheen on your forehead, your hair is knotty. All signs that something isn’t right. Jake quickly mentally ran through any important dates in your relationship, then running through any mentions of tensions or meetings at work when he failed to recall missing anything. Pressing his palm to your forehead, Jake’s concern grows, you’re overheated, not quite a fever, probably just dehydrated, which was especially likely considering the fact that you probably hadn’t moved around much since you got up and settled on the couch to work.

You still hadn’t actually looked over at Jake since he got home, too invested in furiously typing away, filling in countless mindless admin forms that your coworkers were too lazy to do. The only acknowledgment that you had given to Jake, was a distracted hum when he asked about your day. To be perfectly honest, you were in a work focused daze. These forms needed to be done by the fast approaching deadline, and not a single one of your coworkers had bothered to even try to follow the new formatting, leaving you to pick up the slack. Not like you already had your plate full with the rest of your role.

Jake leans against the kitchen counter thoughtfully, observing you work in your stressed state. It was obvious that you were overworking yourself, more than usual, and quite frankly, more than your coworkers and managers would acknowledge.

After mentally processing through the potential options to help you, Jake settled on what he is hoping will work. If not, he’d have to pull out more drastic measures, which he’d strongly prefer not to have to do. You’d hate him for it, and honestly, he’s hate himself for letting you get so bad in the first place.

Pushing himself off the counter, Jake approaches you, albeit a bit cautiously, he wasn’t entirely sure how you’d react. You almost seem paler than before, and you’re sniffling intermittently, eyes bloodshot and dry from staring at your computer screen for way too long.

"Sweetheart, please stop. You've done enough work, you need to rest." Jake’s low and quiet tone cuts through your daze, your eyes flickering over to him for the first time since he got home. Sighing in relief, Jake smiles softly at you, which falters when he realises that you’re not exactly looking at him, as much as looking in his direction. But that alone was progress and Jake could work with that.

Gently reaching out, Jake pulls your laptop away from your lap, saving your work quickly, then turning it off and placing it closed on the wooden coffee table. This grabs your attention, eyes darting straight to meet Jake’s concerned gaze. You open your mouth to protest but his stern look has any complaints dying on your tongue. Blinking up at him, it takes you a few moments to realise that Jake had taken your work away, the panic and stress soon taking over your features.

You scramble helplessly towards your laptop, Jake’s grip around your waist pinning you to his side. A frustrated cry rips from your throat, clawing at Jake’s arm, begging him to let you go. “No! No, no, no, no. JAKE NO! I need to finish my work!” Your voice comes out weak and wracked with emotion, mainly frustration and hurt that Jake wasn’t letting you finish what you’d started.

Jake’s response is to curl his arm tighter around you, his other hand coming up to caress the side of your face soothingly. He mummers quietly in your ear, hoping to help calm you down before you got yourself into a worse state, “Darlin’. Darlin’, look at me. You need to rest, trust me.”

There’s a moment where all you can hear is the breathing of you both, processing Jake’s gentle coos. A soft whine escapes your lips, “But…”

Jake’s grip loosens a fraction as he shifts to get a proper look at your face, fixing you with a firm stare, “Stop complaining, sweetheart.”

Huffing, you instantly relax in his hold, snuggling back into his chest, burying your head in the crook of his neck when he pulls you close. Finally having gotten through to you, all the tension leaves Jake’s body. While he still had a long way to go with you, to try and get you to understand it was okay to take breaks, that working yourself until you burn out is no way to go through life.

The sheer exhaustion of the stress you’d been under the past few weeks was definitely catching up to you. Jake kept a soothing touch on the back of your head, holding you close to his chest, a quick look down at you told him you needed this rest more than he initially realised. You could barely keep your eyes open for more than a few seconds at a time, yawning softly at regular intervals, snuggling closer to him every time.

Feeling content with you settled so comfortably on his chest, Jake exhaled deeply, leaning his head back against the sofa. Closing his eyes, Jake’s breath evens out, yes he had a long way to go to get you to rest properly, but this with you looking so peaceful laying on him, well, Jake could get used to this.

Dinner was takeout, Jake being too tired himself to cook and secretly didn’t want to disturb your sleep while he attempted an old Seresin family recipe. Settling on your favourite, Jake only moved to wake you after the food arrived and he’d dished out the portions.

You were still asleep when Jake came back, still curled up on the couch under a fluffy blanket, wearing an old sweatshirt of his. A small smile flickered across his lips, as Jake’s heart swooned at seeing you so peaceful and wearing his clothes, something you’d initially been too insecure to try.

His smile was short lived, you’d barely roused from your slumber while Jake was busy in the kitchen, or while he was doing odd jobs around the house while waiting for the food to be delivered. There were more and more red flags to Jake that there was something more serious going on with you, than simply being overworked.

A small frown of concern lingered on his face when you barely responded when he shook you gently to try and get you to eat something. Then, when you eventually woke fully, you declined the food, pushing the dishes away, choosing to move away from him, curling the opposite direction instead.

Jake, drawing this up to your over-exhaustion for now, just took your plate away, carefully portioning the food into some tupperware, hopeful that you’d be hungry later. Turning back to the couch, he frowns again, you still remained curled tightly away from him.

Displeased and slightly frustrated with your decision, Jake returns to your side, shaking you awake, despite your groans in protest. When you finally open your eyes, the harsh glare you send his way has Jake internally wincing. He hated to see you like this, but deep down he knew this was the only way to get through to you.

“Darlin’…”

He trails off, unsure of what else to say to you. His brows pull in together, forming a deeper frown. You weren’t okay, he just needed you to admit it. Glancing down at your clenched hands above the blanket, he takes note of the slight tremble of your hands, eyes darting up to your face, searching your eyes for any answers.

There’s a glistening to your eyes that wasn’t there before when you finally make eye contact with Jake. You felt the panic building, like an icy hand gripping your chest tightly. Your mind running a million miles a second, unable to pinpoint a single cohesive thought. Tears streaming down your face, gasping to catch your breath. Reaching out a shaky hand, you try and catch Jake’s wrist, desperate for any direct contact with him, seeking his comfort any way you could.

Jake is immediately by your side, pulling you close to his side, “It’s okay sweetheart. You’re okay darlin’.” Your teary eyes focus on his worry stricken face, Jake was blindsided but your sudden emotional reaction, he knew something was wrong, you’d been withdrawn, but he hadn’t expected you to be so quick to break down the minute he pressed you for answers. “Darlin’. What’s going on?”

You shrug, looking away from him, not really knowing why you feel the way you do. Jake sighs heavily, sometimes he knows you better than you knew yourself, “It's okay, you don’t have to tell me now. Just breathe, nice and slowly, okay?” You hum softly, nodding gently against his chest, “I promise you, you don’t have to hide this stuff from me. I’m always gonna be here for you darlin’.”

Smiling softly down at you, Jake presses a soft kiss to the top of your head, pulling you closer to his side, “Not that I don’t love being used as your personal heated pillow darlin’, but I think we’d both be far more comfortable in bed.” You giggle softly, but agree, Jake was a comfortable pillow of lean muscle, but your bed was so soft and comfortable, and with Jake there to hold you close, you couldn’t think of anything better.

“You’re adorable when you’re so sleepy darlin’.” Jake croons softly, brushing loose strands of your hair back behind your ear tenderly. You shrug playfully, with mock offence at his words, “It’s not my fault that you’re so comfortable to lay on Jake!”

Jake tries and fails to keep a straight face, soon joining you in soft laughter, shaking his head at your antics. He much preferred you to be this happier version of yourself than the one that had a panic attack on the sofa after a stressful work week.

You whine wearily when Jake leads you towards the adjoining bathroom rather than getting straight into bed, which you’d much prefer. The sheer exhaustion from the past few weeks had finally caught up to you, you couldn’t help but yawn as Jake lifted you to sit up on the counter, your usual place when you’d get ready together, whether the pair of you were getting ready for the day, or just going to bed.

You huff heavily, annoyed that Jake seems to be taking his sweet time getting around to whatever he was doing, moving to the edge of the counter, ready to just jump down and head to bed yourself. “We’re almost done, love. Just stay a little bit longer.” Jake’s soothing tone, paired with the calming circles he was gently rubbing on your knee, has you shuffling back on the counter, resting your head back tiredly against the cold mirror.

You must’ve started to doze off, as the next thing you know, Jake is stirring you gently, a soft squeeze on your shoulder, and a gentle touch on your cheek. You groan, eyes flickering shut again quickly at the harsh light in the bathroom. “Can we go to bed now?” Your soft whines have Jake chuckling as he moves to pick you up in his arms, cradling you against his chest, smiling contently to himself when you bury your face in his neck, hiding from the bright lights.

“You’re so cute when you’re so tired.” Jake teases as he places you gently onto the bed, wrapping the blanket and sheets around you, before climbing in next to you and doing the same. He hums thoughtfully as he feels you snuggle closely up to his side, tangling your ice cold feet with his own. You prop your chin up on his shoulder, watching your boyfriend who was deep in thought.

“Jake…” Your voice is a quiet whisper, not wanting to startle him from his thoughts, knowing how he could react when startled by others in the past. You only continue when he hums softly in acknowledgement, looking down at you, a soft smile appearing on his face when he takes in your concerned expression. Jake didn’t need you to continue, he could read you like a book on most occasions, especially when you were this sleepy and worn out.

He shakes his head calmly, pressing a loving kiss to your forehead when your concerned frown doesn’t fade. “I promise you that I’m okay darlin’. I’d tell you if I wasn’t, you know I would.” Pursing your lips, you study his face carefully, for any signs that he wasn’t being one hundred percent honest with you about this. Finding no obvious signs of dishonesty, you nod once, kissing his cheek softly and nestling your head back on his chest, inhaling his comforting scent deeply, sighing softly with content.

You feel Jake take a few deep breaths, then tighten his arm around your body, holding you securely against his own. It was something he’d started doing very early on in your relationship, and something the both of you had grown to love and crave whenever you cuddled together. The intimacy of being so close to each other was something you hadn’t known you’d love so much, but having Jake so close to you, him holding you close, well that something you would never tire of. And for Jake, he would forever be grateful to be able to go to sleep holding the love of his life, and her still be there in the same position, tucked comfortably into his side, the next morning. No matter how much the pair of you moved around in the night, he still got to wake with you by his side, and now, Jake couldn’t see himself spending his life any differently.

Waking up the next day, your throat is scratchy, eyes burning and bloodshot. Groaning, you snooze your blaring alarm, sending a quick text of ‘Hey Jake, I’m not feeling too great, can we push date night?’, to your boyfriend. While technically you lived together, Jake would often spend evenings at his best friend Javy’s house, it was closer to base and helped him to unwind from a stressful workday with someone who understood the ins and outs of the job. You didn’t take any offence to this, as Jake had been expecting you too, it was a way for Jake to unwind, and honestly, it was probably why your relationship was so healthy. Jake got the time to process his feelings, to then be able to get home to you and express them in a healthy manner. You would always support Jake’s out of work time with his squadron, it was almost like a second family, something you all desperately needed after the uranium mission.

It wasn’t uncommon to go to bed alone, especially if Jake had been having a stressful run at work, only to wake with a strong arm wrapped carefully around you, holding you close to his chest, your head resting on him like a pillow. You admired the relationship that Jake and Javy shared, the pair had been through a lot in such a short time, and where most people would have drifted apart, it only solidified their need for each other, feeling and acting more and more like brothers with each day they spent together. But it was when Jake came home to you acting off, that his worries couldn’t be soothed by his wingman. You were everything that Jake had ever dreamed of, and more if he was being honest, and when you acted not like yourself, it set alarm bells ringing for Jake. He had just found you, and in no world was he ready to lose you, especially not so soon.

Jake had been preoccupied all day, you had been withdrawn all evening, and slept through your first alarm, the one you routinely set so you could kiss Jake goodbye. It was something that Jake had grown to love, a simple addition to his morning routine, something he looked forward to each time he awoke to his alarm, getting to kiss you before he left always put him in a better mood, something that his fellow squad members had noticed, and perhaps teased him for.

Javy was the one who approached Jake about his sullen mood, there had been plenty of opportunities for Jake to tease and antagonise the others, yet the absence of Jake’s cocky tone over the radio was concerning to all. Jake’s demeanour had been so off that you woke to a string of concerned texts from Javy, asking if you were okay, if Jake and his family were alright, and the last, rather frantic message demanding to know if you’d broken up with him. If you didn’t feel as bad as you did, you would be texting Javy back with just as much concern for your boyfriend.

You busied yourself with as much work as you could while at home, cleaning, laundry, mindless admin for your job. The occasional tickle of a cough in the back of your throat, an unnecessary reminder that you were unwell. All you’d wanted to do since Jake got back from his deployment was to spend as much quality time together as physically possible, and being sick wasn’t in your plan.

Truthfully thinking, it was probably a bug that Jake had brought back with him. Unfortunately for you, Jake had an absurdly strong immune system, he rarely was ill, often just carrying the bug home to you, which consequently caused you to be unwell. You had a decently strong immune system, but the intensity of your symptoms often left you bedridden with a fever for days.

Gently tucking a strand of loose hair from your messy sleep hair, Jake finally voices his concerns, “Don’t even think about going to work today.” It takes you a few long moments to process Jake’s words, to which you immediately start to protest, mumbling on and on about how you had to work, denying that you weren’t feeling your best.

Furrowing his brows, Jake is again growing more and more concerned about you. Deciding with a different tactic, Jake reaches out to slowly halt you buttoning up your work uniform, “Would you rather go to work, and suffer all day, because you obviously don’t feel well, or stay in bed and get cuddles and forehead kisses and watch movies with me?”

The halting of your weak movements and silence has Jake relaxing, he knew you well enough to know that you were giving in, thinking over the two scenarios. You never could get enough cuddles and kisses from Jake. Never.

Turning slowly towards him, you look sheepishly up at Jake, hands tugging at your uniform, a desperate attempt to get out of the restrictive and stiff material and back into Jake’s sweatshirt. A ghost of a smile flickered across his lips, on the rare occasion you did get sick, you were so needy, having to have Jake nearby at all times as a comforting presence.

Helping you out of your uniform, Jake carefully pulls his sweater back over your head, kissing the crown of your head lovingly. A soft whine slips through your lips, the sudden movements making your head spin, fingers digging into Jake’s arms, desperate for something to ground you.

“Get back in bed. Now. You don’t need to be up and about right now. You need to rest darlin’.” Too lightheaded to even attempt to argue, you allow Jake to gently manhandle you back into bed, tucking your comforter up to your shoulders, making sure your pillows were fluffed and positioned just right, as to prevent any cricks in your neck.

Huffing, as you shift around, trying to get comfortable with all your aches and pains, you try to fight against Jake’s fussing, but soon giving up, too exhausted from just trying to get ready for work. You blink tiredly up at him, eyes dry and bloodshot, “You don’t have to stay and do this Jake. I’ll be okay.” You sit up slightly, pushing yourself against the pillows, “Anyways, you have training. You shouldn’t be here because I’ll get you sick.”

Jake doesn’t dignify your complaining with a verbal response, raising one eyebrow at you, keeping his stare strong and bordering on the edge of harshness. A stare which soon had you shifting uncomfortably under his gaze, shuffling back down in the bed, giving him what you hoped was an equally annoyed stare, but the way Jake’s shoulders shook, told you that it didn’t appear as you’d hoped.

Pouting, crossing your arms across your chest, you huff up at Jake, frustration creeping in as the sickness starts to fully take its toll on you. He sighs heavily, moving closer to your side, to which you continually avoid his gaze, growing more and more frustrated with Jake’s fussing, no matter how much you’d secretly crave, but would never outright admit.

Jake was never one to give in, especially where you were concerned. To his advantage, the two of you act eerily similar when you weren’t feeling your best, a lot of stubbornness and pushing the other away. He switched tactics, continuing to put away all your work clothes and tidying the room up, all the while keeping a close eye on you in case things got worse.

You soon grew tired of Jake’s approach, frustrated that you knew why he was doing what he was, and hating how effectively it’s working. Whining softly, you reach out for him, to which Jake finishes putting away your clothes and slowly moves back to your side.

A wave of nausea overcomes you as you stir from a much needed nap. Screwing your eyes tightly, you pray that the unpleasant feeling will pass, breathing shakily.

Scrambling off the bed, your feet momentarily tangling in the sheets in your haste, you dart into the bathroom, holding your breath and locking the door behind you. There were just some things you’d rather not have the love of your life see. Being this violently unwell was one of them.

There had been countless times when you’d tended to Jake when he was in your position, but the way you’d grown up often meant you’d have to take care of yourself. Even with someone as selfless as Jake, you struggled with the actual complexities of opening up and letting someone take over that caretaker role, the one you’d spent years perfecting for yourself.

The burn in the back of your throat is actually welcomed, the promise of feeling even a little better after throwing up, lingering in the back of your mind. There’s a soft knock on the door, then, a more concerned rattle of the door handle when you fail to reply, too busy trying to catch your breath in between heaves.

Your hair is pulled gently back from your face and neck, soothing fingers rubbing soft circles across the base of your skull. Jake. He ties your hair loosely into a very messy bun, the one he’s seen you do effortlessly, yet his not quite measuring up to the elegant flair yours did. Not that it mattered to you. Jake’s insistence to be a constant presence by your side was all you could dream for.

A few weaker dry heaves later, Jake is leaning away, reaching up to the sink, dampening a soft face cloth and tenderly wiping your face, then turning to grab a clean towel, dabbing your face dry as gently as he could. Your shaking fingers cling feebly to the cold tiles, a desperate plea for the nausea to wane.

A soft whimper of his name had Jake shushing you gently, pressing gentle kisses to your forehead, “You’re going to feel so much better after this, the worst part is over darlin’.” Another soft whimpery sigh is his reply, too drained by this sickness to form any verbal response. The back of his hand on your clammy forehead told him your fever still wasn’t improving, despite your previous insistence that you were ‘fine’.

Sighing deeply, Jake braces himself, pulling himself to stand and bringing you up gently with him, letting you rest heavily against the counter, swaying slightly with each shuddering breath. His large palms cup your face, his worried green eyes searching yours for any sign that you could actually understand him.

“Darlin’…” He trails off as your eyes shift to meet his concerned gaze, “I know you’re gonna hate me for this, but I- We have to get that fever down. You need to shower.” An instant feeble protest from you comes in whines and shifting hesitantly away from him, a move which Jake preempts, catching your arm in gentle hold, just enough is this state to keep you in place. His soothing tone washes over you, eyes flickering closed and nodding cautiously at his next words, “I promise we will get you all cleaned up and feeling so much better when we’re done. I promise you darlin’.”

The spray of the shower is a shock to your clammy skin, much colder than you normally preferred, one that has you hugging yourself closely to Jake’s body, both for warmth and stability.

“I know you hate being sick, but you need to let me care for you. Let me take care of you, okay?”

Instead of the protests Jake is anticipating, he’s met with a weak nod, and your body going more lax under his touch, letting him manhandle you as he saw fit, something you usually fought against with every scrap of energy you could. Now even more concerned with your health, Jake moves you both fully under the water, allowing the spray to cascade down your back and freshen you up.

You blink heavily, in a daze, as Jake methodically dries your body, applies your body lotion, and towel dries your hair, before blow drying it enough for you to sleep comfortably with. Jake’s soft mummerings of soothing praises and reassurances never cease, not as he helps you get dressed, or as he cleans up the bathroom as you sit and watch him from the bathroom counter.

Reaching a hand out to him, Jake ceases his tidying, by your side in one stride, cupping your face gently, peppering kisses across your face. An act which always elicits a soft giggle from you, no matter how you feel. A soft smile on his lips mirrors your own, you struggle to let Jake in enough to let him help you fully, but this was a fight he’d won, one that you willingly let him help you with. That alone was a major step forward in your relationship together.

Guiding you back to bed, Jake is cautious with each movement, all too familiar with how a sudden movement could cause another flare up of nausea. A soft pout is on your lips as he settles next to you, a knowing, sympathetic smile on his.

“I feel so gross and disgusting. I could’ve handled that myself. You didn’t have to see me so disgusting.”

A soft shake of his head, and Jake is lowering his head to meet your gaze, gently guiding your face up to try and catch your eye line.

“Shush, you aren’t disgusting at all sweetheart, it’s only natural.” When you refuse to meet his gaze he continues, “And you’ve seen me in way worse states than that. From drinking too much with Coyote to nightmares after deployments, you’re always there for me.” You finally flick your eyes to his glistening green ones, “Let me take care of you darlin’.”

Swallowing thickly, blinking back stinging tears, you nod sharply, emotions bubbling up with his loving words. Jake wasn’t one to open up fully either, you guess that’s why you work so well together. A pair of people too accustomed to looking after themselves, to observing the most minor changes in their partner, to now allowing someone else to help them.

You shift closer to Jake, snuggling into his side, resting your head on his shoulder, “Thank you. I know I’m stubborn when I’m sick, but thank you for always being here to look after me.” A curt nod, and Jake is pulling you impossibly closer to his side.

“You’re welcome. You don’t have to thank me for looking after you. Ever. But you’re welcome darlin’.”

You drop the eye contact, shy, but nodding in understanding. This is how it’ll always be with the pair of you, you’ll always look after each other, no matter how much the other tries to fight the help. You’d always be there to support each other.

The pair of you stay like that for a while, in your feverish state, you’re unsure of how much time passes. All that matters is that Jake is by your side. Jake eventually pulls away from you slightly, shushing your complaints before you can even voice them.

“I’m just going to grab you something to eat. Just something plain. It’ll settle your stomach enough so you can get some medicine and hopefully some proper sleep.”

Scrunching your nose up in displeasure of this plan, you shake your head slowly, “No way am I even thinking about eating something right now Jake! My throat hurts so badly- And no to that disgusting medicine you’re gonna try to give me.”

A smirk twitches on Jake’s lips, you knew him too well, and vice versa. With a soft kiss to the crown of your head, Jake shifts away from you, tucking you back in bed properly. He pauses momentarily in the doorway, and looks back at you with a serious look on his face.

“If I see or hear you leave that bed, even once, I’m going to physically manhandle you back into it.”

Knowing full well that Jake is dead serious on his threat, you nod once and give him a mock salute, a small signal to him that you’re already beginning to feel more like yourself. He returns your salute with his own smirking, then he makes his way downstairs to grab you some saltine crackers and some water, along with a few medications to help you fight this illness.

The glare you send in Jake’s direction when he returns, does not have the desired effect. Instead of discouraging him to try and get you to cooperate with the food and medicines, all it does is make him chuckle as he resumes his position by your side, with a playful nudge.

“Jake…” You whined in protest when he offered you the open packet of crackers, a small detail not gone unnoticed by you, “I’m really not hungry right now. I just wanna sleep.”

Shrugging, Jake took a cracker for himself, crunching away at your side. You frown, those crackers were your crackers, and now your boyfriend, with a seemingly endless appetite, was tucking in to your snack. Huffing indignantly, you snatch the packet from his grasp, shifting to face away from him, slowly nibbling away at one.

Behind you, Jake has a content smile playing on his lips. His tactic of eating your food worked, again. He knew you’d know that’s what was happening, hence why you turned away from him. Jake was content enough to know that you were starting to feel better, it was often baby steps when you were this unwell. This was a big step in the right direction.

After nibbling your way through half the packet, you chance a glance over at Jake, who is carefully watching you and presses a kiss to your temple, “There you go darlin’. Do you think you could drink some water? It’ll make you feel a bit better.” Jake dips his head to catch your gaze, when you avoid eye contact, a move you pulled when you really didn’t want to do something he asked of you.

Focusing back on his hopeful gaze, you blink cautiously at him, unsure if your body could handle any more. While the strong wave of nausea had settled, it still lingered if you thought too hard about eating or drinking anything.

His gentle nudge drew you out of your overthinking, eyes flickering down to the glass in his outstretched hand. The familiar burning sensation of tears filling your eyes returns, which has Jake on high alert, immediately placing the glass down, out of your sight, concern and worry filling his own.

“Hey, hey, hey. It’s okay darlin’, what’s wrong?” His soothing tone is laced with poorly hidden panic at your emotional state. Jake hated to see you cry, especially when it was something out of his control that caused it, something he couldn’t fix. “Hey, look at me sweetheart. It’s okay, just please try and drink a little, for me?”

Wrapping your arms tightly around him, you cry softly into his chest, shaking your head gently. His hand carefully cradles the back of your head as he holds you tightly to him. Your voice is weak and cracks with emotion, “Jake… I really don’t think I can. It’s just-.” You cut yourself off and look up at him, resting your chin on his chest, “You always take such good care of me. No one has ever done that before.” Jake nods in understanding, he already knew that, it just adds to his confusion as to why you’re suddenly crying over him offering you a glass of water. “You made sure it was iced water, and you got me a straw because you know how much I don’t want to drink it. Jake, you’re so sweet and thoughtful, and I wish I wasn’t so sick because I just want to kiss you so badly.”

Jake nods once more, pulling you back close to his chest, finally understanding that he hadn’t done something wrong and crying just happened to be your go-to emotion when you didn’t feel well. He chuckles softly and presses multiple kisses to the top of your head, “No kisses until you’re better darlin’. You know the rules.” He’s sorely tempted to kiss away the pout that forms on your lips, he just knows that one sick person in the household was enough. It wouldn’t help either of you, if you had to call Javy to bring you food and medicine. Well, it'd be fun for you, Jake on the other hand would never hear the end of it from his squadron.

Offering you the glass again, Jake cradles the back of your neck as you take slow sips, not wanting you to choke or spill any. You don’t miss the way he shifts slightly to reach for the medicine bottle either. Narrowing your eyes at him, you pout, hoping that by some miracle he’ll give in, “I’m not having that stuff again Jake. It tastes gross. In no world does lemon taste like that.”

Jake chuckles softly, running a soothing hand back and forth over your back, fingers occasionally lightly scratching your scalp. “You’ve gotta try some of this, even just a little bit. I promise it’s not that bad darlin’, just try it.” Shaking your head vehemently, you scoot as far as you can to the edge of the mattress, until you’re perched precariously.

Jake reaches an arm out, curling his fingers around your shoulders and pulling you back towards him, your back pinned against his chest. Knowing you’re stuck now, you give in, going limp in his hold and leaning your head back on his shoulder.

He kisses your forehead softly, “Just try. For me?” He brings the small medicine cup up to your lips, as your eyes narrow at him. He gives you his signature shrug and smirk, you mock him as best could which pulls a chuckle from him. Reluctantly, you swallow the foul tasting syrup, immediately reaching for the water that Jake already had in his grasp. You gulp hurriedly, trying in vain to wash away the lingering taste, your glare returns, “If I didn’t love you so much, I’d hate you right now.”

He nudges you playfully, “What? I got you to take it. Did you seriously think the taste would’ve changed after a few months?” Huffing, you playfully shove him back, then when his laughter bubbles up again, you quickly press a kiss to his shoulder.

“I should’ve known better, but it said ‘new and improved recipe’! And you! You looked so disappointed that I wasn’t gonna take it, and you know I can’t say no to you when you look like that!” Jake has the audacity to do his smirk-shrug combo again, which has you laughing weakly along with him.

He swings his arm loosely around your shoulders, tucking you into his side. Finding Jake to be his usual personal body heater, you snuggle impossibly closer to him, head resting on his chest, listening to the soothing sounds of his heartbeat. Your poorly disguised yawn does not go missed by Jake, who’s now concerned that you probably haven’t slept properly in days, “Get some sleep, you need rest darlin’.”

Shaking your head vehemently, you curl around him, burying your head into the crook of his neck, inhaling deeply, whining when he tries to pull away so he could look at your face. “I don’t wanna sleep Jake.” You whine into his neck, “I just got you back, I don’t wanna lose any more time with you than I have too.”

Jake exhales slowly, it’s not the first time you’ve expressed this when he comes back from an extended deployment. Not that he particularly minded you being so invested in spending quality time together, it’s just this time with you being so unwell, you needed rest over anything else right now.

“Just go to sleep. I’ll still be here when you wake up.” There’s one more indignant huff from you, before a bigger yawn escapes you, he nudges you gently, kissing your forehead lovingly, “C’mon sweetheart, you know you’ll feel better for it.” When you peek a look at him, he can see the fear on your face. You’re scared he won’t be there when you wake you, that this was all a dream and he was still on deployment, or worse. He could see it so clearly now, the pain and deep-rooted fear in your glossy eyes. He had never seen you so fearful, it made his heart clench painfully.

“Darlin’. I promise you that I’ll be here when you wake up. I won’t leave your side. I promise.”

His smile is soft and for the first time since he got home, he feels relaxed knowing that you’re not suffering alone anymore. It occurred to him, more frequently the longer your relationship continued, that he never wanted you to be alone like that again, that he’d do anything to ensure you were looked after for the rest of your life. Well, more like the rest of his life, because he couldn’t see himself now without you. Jake needed you in his life, and it was clear now that you are going to spend the rest of your lives together.

He presses a soft kiss to the crown of your head as you doze lightly on his shoulder, eyes flickering momentarily over to his dresser where he’d placed the box a few weeks earlier. Resting his head against yours, he takes a moment to rest his eyes while he thinks over what the rest of his life was going to look like.

He was going to ask you to marry him soon.

He was going to marry you.

tag list - from taglist or seemed interested in this fic! (let me know if you want to be added/removed)

@els-marvelvsp @sky2nd @nouis-bum @atarmychick007 @solo2leo @jessicab1991 @avengersgirllorianna

#allina writes #jake seresin x reader #jake hangman seresin x you #jake seresin x you #jake hangman seresin x reader #jake seresin fic #jake hangman seresin #hangman x reader #tgm fanfiction #top gun maverick fic #jake hangman seresin fic #tgm

151 notes · View notes

crazylittlejester · 4 months

Note

honestly, the fandom dismisses wars trauma a little too much. Have you noticed it’s always never brought up in his character studies? And when it is, it’s totally brushed off him and cia had a WEIRDDD age gap. It’s also weird hyrule warriors never acknowledges this. I honestly don’t think it’s gonna be recognized in LU but idk. It’s just weird how quickly the fandom brushed over all that. What’s your opinion? Cuz you have cool opinions lol

Disclaimer: Everything you’re about to read is my opinion and my interpretation of a game. I’m not talking about headcanons (unless otherwise specified), I’m just talking about my experience with the game and everything else. All of this is from MY perspective interacting with the canon material from both Hyrule Warriors and Linked Universe. Also! I am dyslexic, my bad for oddly autocorrected words or weird spelling mistakes

A huge reason I started yapping so much on this blog was because I saw a lot of people either actively disliking Wars, making fucking INSANE comments about his body, overly sexualizing him, or just straight up dismissing him all together and it helped me get over my posting anxiety because it genuinely made me so upset. He’s been my favorite character since only a few posts into LU (i originally liked Twilight better based sheerly on design but it took like only a few posts before that changed), and I love HW Link in general, and I thought it was actually crazy that more people didn’t like him. I’ve written several of my own characters studies on him, some of which I’ve posted, others lay trapped in my old laptop in the form of a full on analysis paper, never to see the light of day

You can send a full grown man to war and he will come back with trauma, imagine what happens when you grab some poor teenager and tell him everything relies on him. Literally forget Cia for a minute, Link as a teenager was taken and shoved into a full on war where his men turned on him and in order to survive, he had to kill. Monsters and hylians alike, it was him or them, and he’s the one who made it out. Not to mention he was constantly running all over the battle field trying to prevent the hylian captains from being defeated, and he most certainly lost many people he cared about just because he couldn’t get there in time. He had to carry around the guilt that this war was started because some sorceress was obsessed with him ON TOP of that

This was said earlier by an anon on a post I reblogged, and I’ve been saying it myself for months but I will say it again: If Warriors had been a girl and been obsessed over that same way, I fucking GUARANTEE you people would be taking it more seriously

I literally just typed in the character name and the game she’s from and that is what google had to say about her. If an older man was described as ‘harboring serious affections’ and having a ‘desire to claim’ a teenage girl I literally don’t think it would’ve been glossed over or ignored like it is

I don’t think nintendo was ever gonna elaborate or really recognize it in the game, they never go super in depth on anything in Zelda games from my experience, and I doubt Jojo will really get into it in LU mainly just because she has so much going on with eight other dudes and potentially two more (based on the header on the linked universe blog)

I saw a lot of characterizations of Warriors and opinions of him that made me so confused and also a bit mad, such that he is a womanizer or a stupid twink (of which he is neither), and that’s a huge reason I started writing fanfiction for this fandom. Firstly to just create more content for my favorite character because I rarely saw any that focused on him, and secondly because I didn’t like some (NOT ALL) of how I was seeing him characterized. (i cannot emphasize enough: NOT ALL people in the fandom characterized him this way, I saw plenty of amazing and beautiful characterizations of Warriors)

I do not think he is a womanizer at all, in fact I fully believe his flirtatious behavior is a defense mechanism. I think his ‘woman problems’ are the fact that he’s afraid of women (especially older women) he doesn’t know or trust, but also that’s just my opinion. And I am genuinely a bit worried that now that people have stopped talking about how they noticed he seemed off a few updates ago and now that they’re saying he’s back to normal that people are going to start reducing him to a stupid dramatic twink again, as if Warriors was not the one who came up with the initial plan to fight Dink and was not the first one to fight him. As if this is not a man who lead a god damn army. As if everything he’s done and everything he is no longer matters because he’s ‘pretty’

anyways I have a lot of thoughts about him in general and im just glad the fandom has been treating him better as of late, but i am a bit worried it’s just gonna go back to how it was

thanks for the ask!! sorry i got a bit carried away 😭

#linked universe #linkeduniverse #lu character analysis #hyrule warriors link #lu warriors #lu wars #lu warriors analysis #jes talks #jes ask

133 notes · View notes

decolonize-the-everything · 2 months

Note

as far as i know, the transandrophobia post you're talking about is the one by ftmtf who pretty regularly reblogs from spacelazarwolf and genderkoolaid, who are both zionists who deny and downplay the genocide in gaza (on top of being open transmisogynists who dabble in claiming trans women have male privilege). i'm not going to tell you what to think about the theory of transandrophobia but i personally question the motives when a lot of loudest proponents of it either are or associate with these types of people.

The post I'm talking about was made by myself. Someone made a vaguepost in response to it suggesting idk what I'm talking about.

That context aside,

I'm none of those things, advocate for none of those things, and my followers know that so what makes their character a reason to question my character, anyway?

When did y'all start letting racists and genocide apologists speak for anyone? Radfems came and nobody said feminism had to stop existing right?

I think it's entirely possible to recognize good faith, genuine critiques and analysis of how white supremacy affects men (which is the perspective of oppression that my post focused on) and how that intersects with other systems of oppression.

Likewise, the same way you've learned to spot radfem/terf bs I think it's also possible to recognize when that's being done in bad faith like when radfem-type ppl (like spacelazarwolf) do it.

Another response I get is people assuming that acknowledging someone else's oppression would somehow be lessening their own? and I dont see how that's my problem to unpack after we spent the last 5 years explaining to white people that privilege doesn't mean you can't also be poor or queer. We've already read this chapter as a society, I thought?

Imagine how fucking sad it would be if some totally normal person logged on Tumblr, saw the feminist tag full of transphobia, assumed all feminism was like that, and decided "I'm never gonna be a feminist, they're all bigots and also anyone who calls themselves that is fucking wrong and just doesn't know it."

🙃🙃🙃

That is what's happening to non-femme trans people except it's happening before the concept of our oppression under patriarchy/white supremacy has actually even really been discussed which is fucked up cuz like ...how are you gonna let that pathetic, bigoted explanation of oppression be representative of all trans-masc/non-binary people and actively discourage other people from trying to figuring it out too....and it's not bigoted? Like how.

Esp when my post was analyzed it through the lens of white supremacy. So it was also specifically about marginalized mascs and nonbinary people. Like how is wanting to discuss the way your gender impacts, compounds, and informs your experiences and other forms of oppression bigoted just because you're not a woman or femme lol?

I thought we wanted men to do that specifically. What happened to that?

Ofc trans femmes don't have male privilege!!! I think if your concepts of oppression undermine someone else's then your concepts are shit and you should read more. You shouldnt have to misgender, degrade, or dehumanize anyone else to identify yourself or name your oppression. My posts didn't do that, which is why the reactionary response from especially leftist Tumblr has been pretty disappointing tbh.

I've been fleshing my own idea of it out on my blog and that's been aggressively reacted to every single time I've answered questions about it 💀

And it's always bad faith nonsense, like "you just hate trans women" which is just a factually untrue reactionary statement. Like that's not even a critique cuz I know you didn't check the trans tag on my blog, that's nothing to me. Or it's "you don't know what intersectionality is" when I've made sure to read Kimberlé Crenshaw's source material and share it. When I've made sure to even read recent statements she's made commenting on how it's being used and weaponized in modern times.

Or it's seemingly good faith comments like yours anon "well only bigots have ever talked about it..."

Which is just another reactionary comment that doesn't even bother valuable critique.

How would you feel if I said "radfems are the loudest proponents of women rights so think about that before you start associating yourself with them."

sounds like bs misogyny doesn't it?

And maybe your response would be that I should just widen my circle and stop listening to radfems maybe. Maybe you'd tell me that Bigot feminism is not the only feminism out there and it would be on me to educate myself about that in good faith if I actually care about women :)

And you'd be right.

And I'm saying that road should go both ways.

When I'm having that conversation in good faith on my blog, it shouldnt be difficult for a bunch of people calling themselves progressive thinkers to hear me out in good faith instead of assuming I'm a bigot who doesn't know trans women are oppressed.

Like yeah it's shitty and systemic proof that misogyny is alive and real that the only people who talked about transandrophobia thus far are Like That.

However, I do not think it's proof that nonbinary, transmasc, and other marginalized men need to be gatekept from having the vocabulary to describe their unique experiences. We don't use homophobic straight women as proof that feminism shouldn't exist, right? I'm using the same logic. If the shittiest woman on earth deserves to destroy the patriarchy then why doesn't the shittiest nonbinary man you know have the same right? 💀

And going back to the vocabulary thing: Vocabulary, language, and literacy are necessary to dismantle anything and everything you can think of.

I genuinely don't get all the pushback beyond it just being well-intentioned & reactionary at the same time tbh

#asked #answered #transandrophobia #transmisandry #intersectional #intersectionality

67 notes · View notes

sailor-aviator · 1 year

Text

Don't Hang'em Til Noon: Chapter One

Pairing: Jake "Hangman Seresin x Reader

Summary: Jake "Hangman" Seresin is a notorious leader within the Dagger Gang of the old western territories of the United States. You, a recently orphaned socialite from the eastern seaboard, find yourself swept off to live with your older brother who has set down roots in said western territory. Determined to to make the best of your situation, what will you do when said outlaw sets his sights on you?

Warnings: Language, reader being a tad bougie, flirty Jake, ogling men, use of y/n...I think that's it for this one?

Word Count: 2.95k

A/N: Here it is! Chapter One! I hope you all enjoy reading this! As always, likes and reblogs are very much welcome as I crave validation. And again, this blog is 18+!! You are responsible for your own reading! You can also find this story on AO3 written under sailor_aviator!

Series Masterlist || DPU Masterlist || Jake "Hangman" Seresin Tag List

People bustled about the small town as your carriage passed by. Children ran ahead of their parents, men stumbled out of what could only be the local tavern, and women dressed entirely too scantily waved at anyone who passes by. Frowning, you sat back in your seat, once again contemplating how you ended up in this situation. Peering out the window, you looked up to see a tall, wooden building painted in a fresh coat of white paint. Blue shutters hugged the windows along the walls, and a wooden sign with your family’s name hung just past the set of stairs. Most importantly, a tall man stood at the base of the steps, grinning from ear to ear.

A grin of your own broke out and the carriage had barely stopped before you’re throwing the door open and practically flinging yourself out and into the arms of the man before you.

“Benji!” you exclaimed with a laugh, hugging your brother tightly. He reciprocated with a chuckle, resting his cheek on top of your head.

“It’s good to see you too, Scout.”

It had been months since you had seen your brother. Benjamin had insisted on moving out west before you in order to get things settled. You were to stay home and oversee that your family’s heirlooms were shipped safely to your new home. That had been six months ago, and now here he stood before you, still clean shaven, but he had definitely developed a golden complexion during his time in the town of Maverick. Pursing your lips, you look up at him.

“Benjamin, how much time have you spent in the sun these past months?” you scolded. He had the decency to appear ashamed as he ducked his head down, offering you a sheepish smile.

“Longer than you would approve of, I’m sure y/n. But, the house needed seeing to and land was not going to till itself,” he smirked, taking your arm in his and walking up the steps of the building.

“The house?” you inquired with a raise of your eyebrow. Benjamin nodded enthusiastically.

“Yes! Oh, Scout. You’re going to love it! It’s a grand old thing. The furniture has already been placed, but of course you’re more than welcome to rearrange. I’ve even set aside a small plot by the side of the house for you to garden.”

“You have?” you asked as you walked into the building. A parlor of sorts greeted you with newly made furniture and various pieces of artwork hanging on the walls. A door opened up into the hallway that held, what you assumed, the offices for the firm.

“Oh, Benji,” you breathed, placing a hand over your heart. “Daddy would be so proud of this place.”

Benjamin’s chest puffed up in pride as he led you down the hall and into his office. You passed a woman who came out of the office closest to the door. She was beautiful with her dark hair pulled back and blue dress perfectly complimenting her complexion. She offered you a smile and then looked expectantly at your brother.

“Benjamin,” she began, “aren’t you going to introduce me?”

“Of course,” chuckled Benjamin. “Y/n, this is Natasha. Natasha, this is my younger sister, y/n.”

“Please, call me Phoenix,” she said, offering you a hand. You took it and gave it a firm shake. “A pleasure, Phoenix.”

“Your brother has been so excited to see you. All he ever does is talk about you! I feel like I’ve already known you for years,” she teased, causing your brother to blush. You chuckled and drop your hand back to your side.

“I know the feeling. He’s gone on and on about the ‘remarkable, young woman who I’ve had the great pleasure of taking on as my new secretary.’”

“Must you two tease me so?” Benjamin groaned, running a hand through his hair.

“I have work I need to return to anyway,” laughed Phoenix, already turning to head back to the entrance. “Don’t be a stranger now, y/n.”

“She seems nice,” you said to your brother once Phoenix had rounded the corner. Putting a hand on your back, Benjamin guided you into his office, taking the chair opposite you as you both sat down.

“She certainly keeps things interesting around here,” he laughed. You scoffed, thinking back to your earlier conversation with your driver.

“As if things need to be more interesting around here,” you muttered. Benjamin gave you a perplexed look, and you sighed.

“I know all about that…Dagger Gang, Benji. Outlaws running about? Honestly, I don’t know how I let you talk me into coming here.”

“The Daggers are nothing to be concerned about,” he started, stopping when you shot him a skeptical look. Sighing, he continued, “They don’t usually cause trouble for those in town. Maverick has a sort of…truce with them.”

“Usually?” you questioned, still not convinced.

“There have been the odd occasions,” he stated slowly, seeming to pick his words carefully. “Usually when the odd person in town picks a fight or one of them gets too rowdy at the tavern. It’s nothing to concern yourself with, Scout. Really.”

“If you say so,” you relented, dropping the subject and looking out the window. Benjamin sighed in relief, and the pair of you sat in silence for a moment.

“I really am glad you’re here, Scout,” he said softly. Turning to meet your brother’s gaze, you saw the familiar fondness in them that you had missed the past six months. Benjamin was eight years your senior, and had declared himself as your protector from the second you were born. He had been one of the many constants in your life, and now he seemed to be the only one left.

Sighing, you replied, “You’ll have a lot more convincing to do in order to make me decided that this was a good idea.”

Benjamin cracked a smile, and placed his feet on his desk, leaning further back in his chair.

“I’m willing to do that,” he grinned.

“Get your feet off the desk, Benji,” you scowled. “We’re still civilized even if we’re living in the middle of nowhere.”

Ignoring you, Benjamin reached down to open a drawer, pulling out a packet of paper. Dropping the large stack onto the desk with a loud bang, he looked back up at you with a twinkle of mischief in his eyes.

“I’d love nothing more than for you to keep me company, Scout, but I still have paperwork I need to do before I’m finished for the day. If you’d like, you can sit here while I get it done, or you can get acquainted with the town you’ll be calling home.”

“Without an escort?” you spluttered, eyes widening in shock. Benjamin let out a hearty laugh, his head falling back as his shoulders shook.

“Welcome to the west, baby sister.”

You walked slowly down the dirt road that ran through the center of the bustling town. Each building is painted a different, bright color which made it easier to distinguish which business was which. A group of young boys suddenly ran in front of you, nearly knocking you to the ground. Stumbling back a few steps, you managed to regain your footing as the boys shouted an apology back at you from over their shoulders. Looking after them with a bemused look on your face, you felt a chill run up your spine as you hear a low chuckle from the porch of one of the buildings. Glancing up, you see two older men leering at you. Both missing several teeth and covered in layers of dirt, you suppressed a shudder as one of them gives you a gummy grin. Smiling politely, you quickly made your way down the road.

The sun was starting to set, and a chill now settled in the air. A stark contrast from the heat of that morning. Slowing to a stop, you watched as several men went around lighting the lanterns outside of their businesses and along the streets. At least some things were reminiscent of home.

Lost in thought, you didn’t notice the large figure walk up behind you. You jumped when said large figure bumps into your back. You spun around to come face to face with a beautiful, buckskin stallion. Placing a hand on your chest and letting out a sigh of relief, you gave a half hearted glare to the horse before you.

“You scared me,” you griped, earning an ear flick from the stallion. Turning to face the creature fully, you placed your hand gently on its snout, stroking lightly.

“My, aren’t you a pretty thing?” you cooed. The horse swung his head up and down as if nodding in agreement. You giggled, moving your hand to stroke his neck as he nuzzled into your hand.

“I’m sorry, but I don’t have anything for you,” you laughed, earning another ear flick. You wondered how long he had been left out here. The reins attached to his bridle were tied around a post along with three other horses who paid you no mind. Humming, you look into his eyes.

“You know,” you began thoughtfully, “it wasn’t even my idea to move here. I left all of my friends back in Baltimore. I would go to parties in the evening and go for a stroll in the park the next day. There’s none of that here, I’m sure. What even is there to do?”

The horse moved closer, pushing his head into your arms.

“Perhaps you’ll be my friend,” you mused. The horse lets out a snort and you laugh out a breath, smiling softly. Your father had loved horses, and he had made sure to pass on that love to his children. Many happy memories were made riding along the countryside of your family’s country home.

“You’re right,” you relented, “I doubt I’ll be seeing much of you after tonight.”

You continued to stroke the horse’s neck, murmuring soft praises as the large beast seemed to bask in the attention.

“Well, darlin’. There must be something special about you, huh?” came a male voice from behind you. You whipped around just as a sturdy body leans against the post. He was unbelievably handsome. Gold hair complimented golden skin, and green eyes held twinkles of mirth and mischief with a smirk to match. He wore a simple, white cotton shirt with a brown vest and wool pants. His boots and the blue bandana tied around his neck looked a little worse for wear. You blink as you realize that you’ve been staring for longer than would be deemed appropriate.

“I’m sorry?” you questioned, still caught in a daze at the beautiful man before you. You didn’t even think men like him existed in this part of the world. The man gestured to the horse you were still cuddled up by.

“Whiskey here doesn’t warm up to just anyone,” he grinned, resting a hand next to yours. “In fact, he doesn’t like much of anyone accept me.”

You didn’t answer, not sure how to respond. Instead, you turned your attention back to Whiskey who was attempting to nibble at the strands of hair that had fallen out of your updo. Giggling lightly, you pushed the horse away and take a half step back.

The man took a half step closer to you, the grin having given way to a salacious smirk. “I haven’t seen you ‘round these parts before. You new in town?”

“Yes,” you answered politely. “I just arrived here.”

“Figured,” he chuckled. “I would have remembered seeing someone as pretty as you walkin’ around.”

You blushed, suddenly unable to maintain eye contact. This seemed to embolden the stranger.

“So, sugar,” he started, “how much for your debut?”

You looked at him with eyebrows furrowed. “What?”

Chuckling, he continued. “How much is it going to cost me to have you in my bed for the hour?”

Surely you had misheard him.

“I beg your pardon?”

“C’mon, honey. It’ll be worth your while,” he smirked, running his eyes up and down your form. “Promise it’ll be good for you too. Hell, I’ll even pay for the night.”

You felt your cheeks heat up with embarrassment, and in a most completely undignified manner, you began to splutter, trying to maintain your sense of calm while feeling a red hot wave of rage overtake you.

“How dare you!” you shrieked. You saw the smirk on the stranger’s face falter. Good.

“What’s the matter, darlin’?”

“The matter,” you seethed, “is that you have just assumed that I am some woman of ill repute, sir.”

He paused, studying you. “Well, I just figured since you were dressed up so pretty, it must have been to draw in customers.”

“I’m not a whore!” you shouted, drawing looks from passersby. The man held up his hands in surrender. In any other situation it would have been almost comical how frightened he seemed of you considering how he towered over you.

“My sincerest apologies, miss,” he offered, trying to hold back a grin. You turned to walk back towards your brother’s firm with a scowl. Stopping, you peered over your shoulder, fixing the stranger with another glare.

“I would advise you, Mr…?”

“Seresin. Jake Seresin.”

“Mr. Seresin,” you breathed. “I would advise you to not make such horrible assumptions next time you come across a woman you don’t know.”

You didn’t wait for his response as you continued walking. You hadn’t made it ten steps before a shadow blocks the last remaining rays of the sun from your field of view.

“What are you doing, Mr. Seresin?”

“Call me Jake,” he smirked. You frowned up at him, stopping in your tracks to face him.

“I most certainly will not,” you huffed. “Now answer my question.”

Jake stared at you for what felt like entirely too long, and you started to fidget under his gaze.

“Well, since I accidentally insulted you,” he cocked his head at your glare, “I figured the least I could do is walk you to wherever it is you’re going.”

“While I appreciate the gesture,” you said with gritted teeth and a polite smile, “that is entirely unnecessary.”

“Nonsense,” Jake chirped, “what kind of gentleman would I be if I allowed a beautiful young lady to walk around unescorted through town?”

You gave him a dubious look which only caused the smirk on his face to grow into a full blown grin. Huffing once more, you turned back towards the path and began walking. Jake slid up to your side smoothly and offered you his arm. You scoffed at him, and he raised his eyebrows. Scowling, you took his arm and tried your damndest to ignore the obnoxious grin on your companion’s face. It took you only minutes to arrive back at the firm, and you turned to face Jake who glanced from the firm back to you.

“The lawyer?” he questioned, an unreadable expression on his face.

“Yes,” you stated simply, stepping away from him to put some distance between the two of you. Jake crossed his arms and stared up at the building.

“You come here to join your fiancé?” he asked, tone even and face still unreadable.

Surely he wasn’t... “Are you jealous, Mr. Seresin?”

Jake looked at you then, jaw set and green eyes ablaze. “Answer the question, darlin’.”

You shook your head. “No. I’m not even engaged. Benjamin is my brother.”

He seemed to relax at that. He gave you another look that you couldn’t quite place before shifting back to his now familiar smirk.

“I don’t think I got the pleasure of your name, sugar.”

“I highly doubt you’ll need it,” you stated simply. He raised an eyebrow.

“And why is that?”

“Because I don’t believe our paths will cross again, Jake,” you said, lips curling in a small smile.

“Ah, that’s no fair, darlin’. All I want to know is your name,” he grinned, leaning in so close that you could feel his breath fan across your face. Your own breath catches as you locked eyes with him.

“Just my name?” you whispered. He nods.

“Just your name.”

At that moment, your brother and Phoenix chose to walk out the door, stopping in their tracks at the sight before them.

“Scout?” Benjamin said hesitantly at the same time Phoenix said your name. Jake’s eyes shifted to the pair, and that smirk settled on his face once more. His eyes flickered back to you as he leaned away and you found that you were able to breathe normally once again.

“Y/n, huh?” he chuckled. Then he cocked his head and gave you a mirthful look. “Or is it Scout?”

“It’s neither to you,” you scowled, causing him to let out another laugh.

Benjamin walked quickly down the steps and down to your side where he leveled Jake with a stare.

“How can we be of service, Hangman?” he asked tensely, and you looked up at him with a puzzled expression. Hangman? But that was the name of…

Your head whipped back around to look at Jake who just grinned at your brother before shooting you a wink.

“Just escorting your sister back to your door, Benjamin. Wouldn’t want anyone getting the wrong idea, would we?” he grins, not taking his eyes off of you. Benjamin stiffened beside you.

“Yes, well,” he began, “thank you, Hangman. It’s greatly appreciated.”

“Anytime,” replied Jake, already turning to walk back. He gave you another wink. “I’ll be seeing you around then, Scout.”

And with that, he turned on his heels and walked away. The three of you watched him walk away in silence. What on earth had just happened?

346 notes · View notes

butterfwiesndinorawrs · 4 months

Text

Therapy Activities with Bo Bunny!

🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰

Hi everybunny! My name is Bo and I have a passion to help others grow! My human Misky has studied holistic healing and art/play therapy techniques for years and I've picked up a thing or two here and there. This is my opportunity to share what I've learned along my trails.

🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰

Helping Hands

Often times I notice most people help others as much as they can and that's a wonderful quality to have. However they can also forget to help themselves too. It's easy to neglect yourself when life gets busy, or others are counting on you, your responsibilities pile up, I get it- from a bunny's perspective being a human looks rough! You are important too, your goals and interests are important, your health, overall well-being and happiness are important as well!

🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰

Reflection

This time we're going to do our reflection first. Take a few moments to think about ways you can help yourself. These can be ways that help you reach goals, or finish daily tasks, or even just to bring a little more happiness and comfort into your life. If you struggle with this think about ways that you help others in your life and how can you help yourself in those same ways.

Some questions to ask yourself:

🐰 What goals am I trying to reach?

💙 In what areas do I feel I need more support and how can I provide that for myself?

🐰What brings me happiness and joy?

💙 What can I do to help myself feel more organized in my daily life?

🐰 What is most important for my overall well-being?

🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰

Activity

Create your own helping hand. Put your hand on paper, you can paint your hand and stamp it onto paper or you can trace your hand, draw your hand, take a picture of your hand, get creative with it as long as it's your hand. Now think about ways in which you can help yourself. These can be simple like remembering to take your medicine, brush your teeth, eat healthier, get enough sleep, laugh more, color, cuddle your stuffies.. anything and everything that helps you in any way you'd like. These don't need to be big scary goals, these are little ways you can help yourself reach goals or just achieve a more calm and happy state of mind. Add these ways you can help yourself to your helping hand, you can paint or draw pictures, write the words, find pictures in magazines, anything you desire that represents how you can help yourself. When you're done hang this up somewhere that you'll see it often to remember small ways you can help yourself.

🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰

Examples

(From left to right)

💖 Clear my mind

💖Speak my truth

💖 Play

💖 Create my own happiness

💖 Love myself more

(From top to bottom)

🐰 Eat more carrots

🐰 Remember slow and steady wins the race

🐰 Stop to smell the flowers

🐰 Be creative like the easter bunny

🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰💙🐰

Final Thoughts

That's all I have for today! Remember to have fun, make it your own and get creative with it. I hope this helps you find small ways to help yourself more and remember that you're worthy of your own support too. If you'd like to share your own helping hands Misky and I would love to see! Feel free to post and tag us, reblog this with your own helping hand or submit a post to our blog. Until next time remember you are worthy of support and love especially from yourself. Nobody will ever know you as good as you know yourself, you know your needs and desires and it's okay to provide those to yourself! Be kind to yourself, be patient with yourself and show yourself lots of love, you deserve it!

-Bo Bunny 🐰💙

70 notes · View notes

therecordconnection · 10 months

Text

Some Thoughts Regarding James Somerton

I know I'm rather late to the conversation and some of these points may have already been talked about in some form elsewhere on the site, but if you don't mind, I have some thoughts of my own regarding the subject of hbomberguy's latest video and I would like to take time to voice. This blog is normally dedicated to music and music writing, not posts about disgraced Youtubers, so I apologize for the detour in regularly scheduled programming.

First, I think it's important to make the distinction that Somerton isn't just a case of "problematic Youtube guy got owned... twice" but rather a genuine case of academic dishonesty, which is several grades above youtuber drama. This isn't something like Tati Westbrook getting angry at James Charles for sucking dick and cock at a birthday dinner. This isn't Ethan Klein and Trisha Paytas or whomever having beef. It's not Charlie Critikal talking about some stupid drama of the day or someone just using Youtube videos to say a bunch of gross and problematic stuff. No. This is a fucking grifter who not only lied, cheated, and stole his way to the top, but also did it by using a vulnerable community that has long had their voices snuffed out and their history completely rewritten or wiped from existence altogether. What history he didn't plagiarize, he twisted and outright lied about. He just made shit up to suit his own gross agenda.

A lot of things about James Somerton left me absolutely livid, and I admit that I didn't even know who he was until hbomberguy's video. I think what makes me the most mad is that I went to undergrad and grad school with a number of jackoffs that were just like him. People that didn't give a shit about the art of writing and research and just treated academia and the pursuit of knowledge and how to critically engage with art and media into a stupid game that only chumps take seriously. Somerton pisses me off because I AM a writer. When I write the Ranting and Raving series of posts on here, that stuff doesn't just fly out of my ass. I have to sit with a song, study it, research it, and make sure I know what I'm talking about so I don't look like a clown. I also have to make sure that I link and credit where I'm getting information from. It's not just important for my own satisfaction, but it's important for anyone who stumbles upon a post on this blog and takes time out of their day to read it and/or reblog it.

I think that's the part that makes me the most mad. That he and Nick Hergott have so little respect for the work that goes into researching and writing about a topic that other people are really passionate about. Spending time with something, studying it, and figuring out an interesting and unique perspective on it is a great feeling. Sharing what you find or how you see something with others and having them either like or reblog your work is an even greater feeling. That's my writing that somebody enjoyed and thought was worth sharing with others. Fuck fuck fuck Somerton for thinking you can take a million little shortcuts to get to that result.

While I'm on the topic, I don't think Hergott gets a pass for Somerton's actions. I've seen some people make the argument that he isn't complicit and there's a chance that he genuinely had no clue that Somerton was doing this... but I don't buy it. There's no way he didn't know and wasn't in on it in some capacity. Even if he wasn't, as Todd in the Shadows pointed out in his video on this situation, Nick is, whether you like it or not, an accomplice to Somerton's lies and he is complicit in the blame, due to his name being included in the "Written By" credit of a lot of those videos with Somerton. The way I see it, I find it hard to believe that he couldn't have known. I imagine part of Hergott's signing on with Somerton was that in the event that shit hits the fan, Hergott would be used as a fall guy to help deflect accusations of plagiarism.

To return to Somerton, in a way, he's almost worse than AI/Chat-GPT because, really, an AI has no morals. It can only do what someone punches in and tells it to do. Somerton is a guy who does have genuinely insidious ambitions and knows fully what he's doing. That shit about "only the boring gays who didn't mess around in the eighties survived the aids crisis" is the wildest and grossest accusation I've seen about gay people in some time. The wild takes about the Nazis (especially all the wrong things he said about fitness relating to Nazis) should also raise a lot of red flags. I'll say this though, I don't blame anybody in the slightest for not fully realizing Somerton was saying shit like that or doing all of what he was doing until hbomberguy and Todd presented it a certain way and made it all very clear. It's easy to not notice it when Somerton buries it by ripping stuff off from other, better writers. So, if you were someone who was a big fan and was genuinely shocked by the things Todd had to fact-check and debunk and worried that you're a bad person for having not caught any of them, trust me, you're not. Nobody should blame you for not catching it. <3

While I'm ranting about this, I want to say that Somerton's patreon grift was really gross to see exposed as well (through Dan Olson's really great thread, which can be read here). I understand the allure of wanting to buy expensive gear and thinking that's somehow needed in order to make Good Content™️, but there's a stark difference between someone saying "I think I need to shell out a little money in order to get something of higher quality" and "I need to have the appearance of looking like my stuff is being made with high quality stuff." As someone who has been experimenting with trying to turn his writing into video, I did some audio tests this weekend and realized that maybe (just maybe) the old Turtle Beach microphone my brother left behind when he moved out isn't going to cut it. If I want to record something I can be happy with, I'm gonna have to bite it and look at getting something decent, but somewhat affordable from a Best Buy or something. You don't need the best tech in order to make something great, but you can't use copper tools forever if you have the means to be able to enjoy using iron ones, you know?

Somerton's grift reminded me of guys like Onision and Spoony. Grifters who looked to Patreon and other creator donation sites for an easy pay day and would bitch and cry and complain that it's your fault when they don't get it. Somerton making poor financial choices ON TOP of it being money that he scammed from a community of people that were looking to invest in a voice that they genuinely thought was speaking for them in a meaningful way, only makes the grift more disgusting and foul. Even if he's just "some Youtuber," Somerton still had a responsibility to his audience to present queer topics in an ACCURATE manner. He didn't and we all have the right to be angry with him about it. This isn't just silly youtuber controversy, this is academic dishonesty in it's purest form and if it gets you expelled from any college program, it should get you expelled from being able to show your face on Youtube as well, which is how Somerton's story will end.

I've been on the internet for many years. I've seen some of the worst, most problematic creators of all time find a way to bounce back from all kinds of controversy and find some kind of success again. I don't think that will happen for Somerton. Not one bit. What he's done is something you can never come back from, no matter how much you try to reform. If two different youtubers can make two completely different videos about why you suck, I don't think there's any recovery. What happened this weekend is a now classic episode of World's Most One Sided Fist Fights Caught on Film.

This post has gone on for a while, so let me wrap it up. I mean this without hyperbole and without exaggeration: James Somerton is a disgrace to both media criticism and the art of video creation. I genuinely hope he remains propped up as a cautionary tale of what can happen when you fully decide you have absolutely no respect for the Humanities and decide that lying, cheating, and stealing your way to the top, all while scamming and being incredibly shitty towards a community that has long suffered and is STILL suffering greatly to this day, is better than any kind of academic honesty. I understand that Somerton is just "some youtube fraud" to some people, but the problem lies more in what Somerton's actions and motivations represent. I really think hbomberguy's video on plagiarism is going to do a lot of good. It's going to help a lot of people avoid doing it as well as help people become more aware of what it really looks like and all the damage it can do.

Thank you for your time.

P.S. It doesn't really need to be said at this point, but make sure you support the queer voices and writers that did the work Somerton thought was good enough to just copy and paste into a video. They're the ones that suffered the most through all of this and my heart goes out to them, from one writer to another. <3

#original post #plagarism and you(tube)#james somerton #hbomberguy #todd in the shadows

157 notes · View notes