#my parents are such experts at guilt tripping

[like-butterflies-and-glitter]

you can never tell your parents that they are not helping by constantly texting or calling you for updates. and if you don't get back to your texts they will call. and if you do tell them they will be mad and tell you that fine they will not contact you, and that you can contact them whenever you wish to talk or ask for something. and they will do it crying, refusing to listen to how them micromanaging and keeping you constantly on the phone is not helping the task at hand if not jeopardising it and giving you more anxiety, which there is plenty of already.

[peggy-sue-reads-a-book]

The Garden of Innocence

Summary: Dionysus is not a Joe Goldberg tier weirdo following her around the beach because he would never be so that.

Chapter 5

She waited for despair. But all that came was more anger. Stupid Theseus. Stupid man and his stupid honor, his proud parents, his princely laurel, and all the other things he should have thought of before accepting her help. It was ridiculous.

She wished she’d been quicker that morning on the beach, negotiated with him. Had she been thinking, she might have played on his guilt and convinced him to deliver her somewhere safe. Surely, surely there was somewhere for her. Circe, her aunt might take her.

Perhaps it wasn’t too late. She thought of the fig tree again. She tore through the woods, never tripping, never looking down. Even if she did not find it, there had to be others. She was hungry. And more than anything, thirsty.

…

The argument has been pretty dull. The man moaning about his kingdom and his crown. The woman, indignant. Dionysus was a young god, but already one mortal squabble was the same as the next.

He sighed and tried to leave. He could not. Uninterested as he was in the scene, he had planned to sleep for the entire week and their voices were growing louder.

Will you shut up! he cried. And a flock of gulls squawked overhead. One of them even shat, barely missing the man’s hair. A petulant wave slammed into the hull of the boat, indicating that they really had ought to get a move on. Couldn’t they take their domestic problems back to wherever they came from?

When the man finally boarded his vessel, Dionysus was sure to give it an encouraging little push.

“Zeus be praised,” the man muttered, bowing his head piously.

Zeus, my ass. He wouldn’t notice the likes of you if were to fuck his mother with your hair on fire. Now get out of here. And look where you’re going, would you? Nevertheless, Dionysus drew a breath and released a gentle puff, just enough to fill the sail. It stretched against the wind like the wing of a great crow.

Dionysus wasn’t an expert in sailing, but it looked to him that the man was harried, juggling tasks. Maybe he was just sunburned. That is when he struck him that the woman was missing. Mortals were not generally afforded close scrutiny unless they had very much offended him. For Theseus, he felt only a mere pinprick of dislike. Just enough to draw him from his ennui.

The a wave split against the prow. For an instant, the sun was blistering bright. Dionysus squinted against the sudden glare.

She’ll die, you know.

“Shut up, Apollo,” he muttered.

Theseus startled. Of course, he could not hear their voices but he sensed a threat. They always did. Dionysus decided Theseus was a liability. If he stuck around for long enough for the god’s presence to send him into cardiac arrest, the chances are some other god would be offended. Probably one of his sisters. After all, he was handsome. A little taller than Dionysus himself, actually. Aphrodite’s type, come to think of it.

The god took his leave. Underwater, he allowed himself to take form, if only to feel the pleasure of a cool current against his sides. His body was sleek, with beautiful wrists and jutting hipbones. The salt stung his face where the sun had burned him in its sudden flare. He was glad. He knew why humans occasionally pursued pain in their lovemaking; it rendered pleasure so much sharper, clearer. It was perhaps why the luxuries of Olympus failed to hold his attentions.

When he returned to the beach, the girl was crying. Not loudly. She perched on a rock in the shadow of a larger rock, inconspicuous. Theseus would not see her if he looked back.

Of all things, she was tearing ruffles her skirt. The lovely sandals were gone from her feet. She bandaged them in the strips of linen. Makeshift shoes, he supposed. She didn’t look hurt. Another strip she used to secure her hair in a braid.

With her hair back, he could see she was a sweet-faced girl, despite how sour her expression. Once the boat was out of sight, Ariadne climbed down from the rocks and began walking slowly inland. The beach was full of scrub and yellow flowers. None of it remarkable from the rest. She found a branch jutting from one of the taller bushes and tore another strip from her skirt, marking the branch with a tight not.

Dionysus watched her, bemused. As the forest grew thicker, she snapped twigs from trees as she passed them, leaving them to dangle. And every few paces, she would tie another marker to a branch. Her dress — what was left of it — was brightest blue. The same cheerful aqua as the sea at midday. It looked well against her warm skin. Sometimes, she would stop and frown, with the appearance of listening for something.

At first, he did not understand the pattern of her movement through the woods, until it became obvious she chose paths leading downhill. She was looking for water. Dionysus felt stupid for having taken so long to have guessed. Then again, he needed nothing for mere survival.

There were streams on the island, plenty of them. But where there were streams there were naiads. They might see her pretty face reflected in their own vessels and turn salty out of spite. Worse were the river gods. They would be all to pleased to find a pretty mortal, parched and alone. He knew. This place was rich with divinity- even Theseus had felt it.

Well, she’d been through enough for one day. Apollo had said she would die soon. There wasn’t much he could do about fate. But give her today. Thirst was a terrible way to go. Hidden in the shade of an oak, he shut his eyes.

“Oh!” Ariadne cried, jumping. Where her foot last struck the earth, icy water spurted. As she stared, more water shot from her own footprint, taking the most perfect shape of a small fountain. Dionysus smiled at his handiwork. Dispensing blessings was fun. Usually, they slaughtered a cow for you, maybe even pledged their firstborn to your holy service.

He waited for her smile, her hands clapping in relief. Instead, she was terrified. Ariadne stared at the water, obviously desperate for it. She looked around, eyes large and frightened. She knelt by the fountain. Instead of drinking, she prayed.

“Please. Please, please.” Though barely audible, she was begging not to be poisoned.

Dionysus rolled his eyes. Humans were pitiful. You show them a miracle and still they grovel. Tentatively, the girl reached her cupped hands and drank from them. The water was perfect, as he knew it would be. Colder and purer than melted snow, which even she had never tasted. It would probably sustain her even in her hunger.

She splashed her face in it, her arms, her feet. Watching her joy, it struck him how dirty she was. Sandy and sunburnt. Once she had cleaned up and had her fill, she knelt again and bowed her head. “Thank you,” she whispered.

To his surprise, she unpinned a golden broach from her bodice, dropped it in the fountain like a child making a wish. It was so mortal of her. Attempting to pay you in their trinkets. Probably just afraid of being smote. She took a last sip of water and left. Who knew what she was looking for now. Food maybe. It was anyone’s guess what a human being did when it was lost. He’d never paid much attention.

Dionysus did not follow her immediately. He stopped to look at what she’d dropped in the fountain. The thank you gift. It was no fatted calf but the gold was nearly pure, yellow as a bee. The broach was in the shape of two dolphins. Nose to nose, tails brushing. He felt bad for taking her treasure, and almost left it behind in the fountain.

Then again, nymphs nearly all had sticky fingers and any number of them were running around gossiping already about the fountain in the footprint. The gold warmed in his hand. He took it with him.

@dionysian-daydream @hycinthrt @withlovefromolympus @kebriones @margaretkart @lefty-scissors @human-still-developing @a-world-of-whimsy-5 @axhicleos @shitfacedalways @johaerys-writes?

[my-shields-are-down]

Chenford + what do you mean your parents don't know about the barrel?

“Hang on, hang on…. Hold the phone… wait. What do you mean your parents don’t know about the barrel?” Tim had stopped mid-step almost tripping himself and Lucy as they were walking up the driveway to his house.

“They were at the hospital afterwards. I argued with them about your recovery - about what would be best for you. Your mom and I glared at each other for 15-20 minutes in the weirdest, adults-only staring contest I’ve ever won. How do they not know?”

Lucy sheepishly looks up at Tim, while biting her lower lip. They had just come from brunch with Aunt Amy and telling her about their engagement. Tim looks so handsome in one of his deep blue button downs, sleeves rolled up showing off his tanned forearms. She loves watching the muscles in his forearms flex - probably because she imagines them flexing his hands and fingers while he…

Tim snaps his fingers in front of her face. “Hey. Where’d you go? Come back here and talk to me.”

Lucy sighs and shrugs her shoulders, her long hair blowing around her face in the early afternoon breeze. “I - I - l. Well, at the time, it made the most sense because we were already estranged and they made it clear they did not approve of me being a cop. Do you really think me telling them that I was in the hospital after a serial killer I came in contact with because of my job, that YOU had met and indirectly approved of, had kidnapped, drugged and ultimately killed me was suddenly going to change that opinion? No, it was not. And neither was telling them that you, my training officer were the one who did CPR to bring me back to life. They already hated you - that wasn’t going to help. They’d harass you with questions about how you let this happen, tapping into your protectiveness, your guilt - they are experts at finding the guilt and twisting it to their advantage. I didn’t want that aggravation, that frustration, that additional pain for either of us. We both had enough to deal with, thank you very much.”

“You were and are my medical proxy, my emergency contact. You got to decide who saw me and when, you chose who took care of me. You did all that so effortlessly. I never thanked you for removing that stress from my recovery.”

“So no, I only told them I was assaulted. I briefly got their love and concern back before the lectures about my job began again, and then Jackson told them to leave - again. I probably will never tell them. I am ok with them not knowing. Are you ok with that?”

Tim looked into the wide eyes of his fiancé. This woman who healed him in so many ways, who brought him back from the pit of despair and filled his life with love and laughter, the promise of grandkids (grandkids!) and a lifetime of never ending happiness. Lucy Chen knocked his socks off with how she loved him. She never pushed or prodded, she was just there - always loving him just as he is. Returning that love back to her in the same way was the least he could do.

“Yeah Luce. Whatever you need and want. I’m happy to never mention it again. I love you so much.”

[yvannahaleth]

HEYOOO, Can i request for a Rantaro Amami with a emotionless S/O who overworks themself due to their parents saying thay they aren't good enough to the point s/o's parents called s/o a total failure, and now since that happened. We start overworking to get high grades and high scores on exams, quizzes and more!! I hope you dont mind doing my req!! Thank uu~

Hellooo!! Thank you for this, anon! I hope you'll like this, have a perfect day!

(GN! Reader, SFW, Fluff)

Rantaro Amami x Overworking!S/O

At first, he thought that you're just a really passionate about your grades.

Though, he kinda feels weird about your act against everyone else

Why does he feel like you never actually feel happy?

Why does he feel like you never actually feel anything?

Let's be clear, he can read the room *very* well to the point where he can feel rather you're actually feel some emotions or not.

Once he knew, (he probably figures out himself based on your actions since he feels bad to ask it to you directly)

His heart shatters.

He's a very emphatic person. you can't deny that

He won't make it clear, but he'll try his best to comfort you

Like, he'll do ANYTHING to comfort you

Whether by giving you words of affirmations to make you feel wanted enough

Whether by kissing you in the forehead (if you allow it)

By giving you the slightest acts of service

He'll offer to do your work for you

He'll offer to buy your favorite drinks and snacks EVERY SINGLE DAY

He'll offer to massage your back for you

He'll offer to help you study (20% of the time is you studying with him, 80% of the time is you spending time alone with him by watching movies)

AND YOU CAN'T TELL ME THAT HE DIDN'T TRY ABOUT GOING TO YOUR HOUSE WITH YOU AND TALKS ABT YOU TO YOUR PARENTS

Noo, he won't be like

"Yeah, they're overworking and it's because of you. Please open your eyes."

HELL NO

He's an expert of having a conversation.

"Yes, they're absolutely smart and somehow it bothers me how whenever i see them, they'll be either studying or sleeping. But, i suppose that their parents are doing their job to make sure that they're not pressured or anything, haha. It'll be *very* bad if you makes them study that hard, yeah? I'm sure you would never do that. What kind of parents does that to their own child? Haha."

He uses guilt trip.

Damn he's a menace when he wants to.

Overall, he'll try his best to make sure that you know that you are doing more than enough (without making it obvious, he doesn't want to worry you)

But, BUT, when he had enough.. When he felt that he doesn't want you to feel more pressured, he'll try to talk about it to you

Letting you know you're doing incredible despite what your parents did to you

Listening to you talking about it (if you do want to talk abt it)

And gives you solutions, like try talking to your parents about how it affects you (if you ask for solutions, ofc)

If you don't want to talk about it or don't want to do anything about it, that's fine.

He'll continue to comfort you by any ways possible

He's wholesome. Really.

[amyintherapy]

A weird thing about hanging around in mental health spaces online, maybe especially when seeking content related to cPTSD, insecure attachment and childhood emotional neglect - is you start getting bombarded with content about narcissistic parents...and a lot of it is just referencing bad parenting. Things like dismissing your kids' emotions rather than validating them. Or using subtle guilt-trips to get your kids to behave. Maybe overly strict parenting or the use of corporal punishment at times...but a lot of just emotionally dismissive "I'm the parent and I disagree with you (my child), so I am right and that's that" kinda stuff. I get it on tumblr, tiktok and Facebook reels now.

I agree that these things are harmful, but it's kinda whack to suggest that all or most people who parent that way are narcissists. I'm no expert of course, but it seems to me that most of them are 'just' emotionally immature adults with unhealed trauma who repeated a cycle rather than breaking it. They don't know how to feel their own feelings or regulate their own emotions in healthy ways, so they are overwhelmed by their kids' emotions and try to shut them down through dismissing them or invalidating them or even overpowering them/intimidating them - as they have no idea what else to do. And they probably also bought into narratives that told them that it's their job to 'make' their kids behave, or that if you don't hit your kids they'll grow up to be jerks, etc...which is easy to do if that's how you were raised and how most people around you were raised, too. It seems normal when it's what you know.

If it comes from emotional immaturity or trauma, it doesn't make it any more or less "okay" than if they had NPD. The responsibility they have for their behavior is the same regardless. I just don't get why it's become so common to label almost any example of abusive or neglectful behavior as narcissism.

[omarvel-comics]

Prologue

@mikkokomori

Hero was excited. It was time for winter break. Ever since Sunny revealed the truth of Mari's death a year ago, Hero switched his major from Medicinal Practice to Culinary Arts to become a chef and make Mari proud. His roommate though, was still a med student. Hero had just finished packing. He was going home. His parents were gone, last minute business trip. They took little Sally with them, so it was just gonna be him and Kel. Before Hero could get into his car, he felt a hand grab his shoulder. He spun around and saw his roommate, out of breath.

"Hero…*huff*...dude…*huff*...you gotta help me!" He said. Hero rolled his eyes. Peter, his roommate, had a bad tendency to procrastinate.

"My final is tomorrow! You're a med student-"

"WAS a med student." Hero corrected.

"Yeah whatever point is you gotta help me!" Peter said, dramatically clinging onto Hero and sobbing.

"OK ok." Hero said.

"Great! Meet me in the radiology lab!" Peter said, running off. Hero made his way through the snow covered paths to the lab. Inside the lab were lots of sealed off areas, along with Hazmat suits. No one noticed that a spider was in one of these areas as the area was sealed and radiation poured in. Hero walked through the halls, and eventually found Peter. After studying a bit, the door to the chamber opened. A student in a hazmat suit stepped out. So did a Spider. As Hero walked, he noticed the spider and froze. It was his natural reaction around spiders. Fear clouded his mind.

"Yo Hero! You coming? I'm gonna be late for my date with Gwen if you don't hurry up!" Peter yelled, trying to guilt Hero into moving, because if push came to shove, he totally would leave Hero and go on his date. Hero was screaming internally as the spider crawled on his legs. Peter came to check on him and noticed the spider bite Hero's leg. Peter squished the spider.

"Man, you really need to get your Arachnophobia under control!" Peter said.

"Heh heh…yeah…"

Peter and Hero parted ways at the train station. Hero got on the train to head to Faraway. He didn't feel good, but just thought it was a cold or something. He was glad to be going home. He lived in a small town, though there was a city about 30 minutes away by car. Cities were dangerous, with super villains around. And Nearby City only had cops, not its own Superhero. Hero didn't like going to Nearby but thats where the closest train station to Faraway was. Kel was going to pick him up, since he just got his license. The train ride was a few hours long. Hero felt nauseous, so he took a Tums. He was feeling really weird. Anyway, he was almost home anyway. The train stopped in Nearby station. Hero got off and saw Kel.

"Yo! Hero!" Kel called. Hero waved. He STILL didn't feel well.

"How are you? How's college?" Kel said, a big smile on his face.

"I-I don't feel well…" Hero said.

"Well…ok! You can see my expert driving skills! Hehe~" Kel said, dragging Hero to the car. Throughout the car ride, Kel was talking, but Hero wasn't paying attention. Why did he feel so bad? Was it something he ate? Hero didn't know…

"Alright Hero! Home Sweet Home!" Kel said. Hector ran up to the car as Kel and Hero got out of the car.

"I can't wait to spend time with you again! I'm sure Aubrey, Basil, and Sunny will be excited too! Sunny is visiting and staying with Basil and-" Kel stopped talking when he noticed Hero holding his head.

"You ok?" He asked.

"I think I need to sleep…" Hero said. Kel masked his disappointment with a smile.

"Well, let's get you to bed!" Kel said. Hero went to their shared room, and went to sleep.

[the-anonymous-vent-blog]

Tw: mention of self owchie

My parent just suddenly keeps noticing my self owchie scars and gets upset whenever they see it, they keep insisting I put lotion or other moisturizing cream to rid myself of the scars but so far nothing has worked, they keep getting angry and frustrated / emotional whenever they see the scars and at one point (while pointing out other things I can take my anger out on) said "if you want to cut something it can be my arms instead" which at that point for aome reason I felt weirdly angry and insulted, I've shut myself in my room and feel like I really want to cry, but my parent is right outside in the living room and can come in at any point so I don't really want to risk it, I know thier just trying to comfort me but everytime they do try its almost like getting run over by big heavy stones and by the end of it I feel worse them I already was. I don't understand what's wrong with me and why I can't just take the support and be happy thier even trying, I don't understand what I'm supposed to do and how I can get rid of these feelings of guilt shame and feelings I can't describe.

Apologies as this will sound crass, but does your parent have their own history of mental illness, manipulative behavior, or trying to guilt trip you? I fear misinterpreting this, and I'm not really an expert on normal people, but I assume most wouldn't say you could cut their arms instead; even if it is out of stress and worry.

Secondly, have you tried explaining to them the scars just won't go away? Are they confident theres some way of doing it or is it just pure denial? Did they already have knowledge of your scars or did they only learn recently?

Is it possible someone else pointed out your scars to her? In my younger years my parents would only pay attention to my health when a doctor pointed out how unhealthy I was. They'd then pay extra attention to me which would fade after a month or so, so there's a chance you can ride this out and wait for them to forget.

Do you have a safe place to cry? It's vital you have somewhere you can, even if it's a bathroom.

If you try to talk this out, i would recommend doing therapy together, just so you have a neutral party. Of course, therapy isn't possible for a lot of people and that may include you.

Good luck, though I hope you won't need it.

[swinging-from-my-cable]

.

[dameronology]

rescuer {din djarin}

summary: din djarin rescued you - and then you rescued him {for @drinksomecoco !! i hope u enjoy}

warnings: brief mentions of torture, swearing

this is like....4k words?? it got a little out of hand, i won't lie to u.

- jazz xx

It wasn’t often that The Mandalorian found himself becoming attached to bounties.

Twice. He’d done it twice.

The first time, he swore to himself that it would be the last. Adopting his little green surrogate...frog? Son?

Okay, adopting his little green surrogate Grogu had brought enough tension into his life. It had gotten him back onto the radars of both the Empire and the New Republic; thrown him into some weird form of fatherhood that he wasn’t quite ready for and tipped his entire way of life upside down. Despite all that, he never stopped to question if all the exhaustion was more trouble than it was worth, because he loved his kid. Completely and entirely in ways that no parenting book or fairytale could ever quite describe. It was an intense form of love and attachment - and Din knew it was going to hurt when he would eventually have to return the Child to his own people. That was a little far off though, because he couldn’t investigate any further til he had the means to do so. Money and resources weren’t limitless and even The Mandalorian had to find means to an end.

Going back to the Bounty Hunter’s Guild wasn’t ideal, especially not with the kid in tow - but did he have any other way? Din didn’t know any other way of life, let alone another way of earning money. Besides, he figured it would only be a quick few months. A couple jobs here and there until he had enough in savings to travel far enough to find where Grogu really came from.

But it was two bounties; two bounties that he would find himself becoming attached to. Grogu was the only one.

It was through that decision to return to the Guild that Din Djarin would find himself stumbling across the next one. He was offered five pucks - the first four were easy. Standard jobs, really. Runaway criminals and Imps who had crossed people so many times that trying to work out their loyalty was head-ache inducing. He found them all in a matter of days, really. They were good at hiding but it didn’t count for much when The Mandalorian was good at finding.

Then there was you; the fifth puck. The one he thought was going to be the easiest.

Finding you wasn’t a problem. Tucked away in a corner of rural Tatooine - maybe twenty, twenty five minutes shy of Mos Eisley - you were hiding in plain sight. It would have been enough to protect you from anyone else but Din was an unrelenting expert in finding those who didn’t want to be found.

He never quite knew what to expect when he closed in on a bounty. Sometimes they ran and sometimes they hid. A few of them had tried to appeal to his humanity; to try and connect with the man they hoped was behind the mask. Because aside from the husky voice that occasionally escaped the helmet, there was no proof that The Mandalorian was anything other than a very convincing droid. That was, until, someone would lay a hand on his son or ship and suddenly, a wave of pure human rage would burst out from beneath the beskar.

You couldn’t have hidden from him or run away, even if you wanted to. Not because you were scared, but because you were chained up; wrists and ankles in shackles, keeping you tied to the walls of a filthy docking bay. From the sand piled around your feet, it was clear that you had tried to kick up a fuss at some point.

But based on the way that you looked at him - with tired eyes and a hopeless expression - that made Din realise: you’d lost the will to fight. He knew that you weren’t going to wriggle away or try to engage in combat.

“Are you…” The Mandalorian trailed off. “Are you alone?”

“Probably,” your eyes flicked up from the ground, unknowingly capturing his gaze. “I think I’ve been left for dead.”

He sighed. “I’m looking for a...Kan Durant. Is he here?”

“No,” you shot back. “He left me here for dead about a week ago. Probably knew that a bounty hunter was going to come after him at some point.”

“Do you know where he went?”

“I’m chained up,” you said. “Isn’t the answer to your question a little axiomatic?”

“Maybe,” he replied. “But if you know anything, it might be helpful.”

“Try Corellia,” you muttered.

Corellia. That was...doable. Not too far and not too hard to search. That would be his fifth and final puck and then Din could set off for the sunset in search of his kid’s home planet. That’s what this whole thing had been about.

But...you. You’d been left for dead - and based on the bruises around your eyes and on your limbs, that was the least of what you’d gone through recently. What kind of man would it make him if he left you? A fucking awful one, obviously, but what was he supposed to do?

Din slowly leant down, pulling a thin tool from his belt. He fiddled around with your cuffs for a moment, until there was a low hiss. They fell from your hands and onto the sandy ground - he expected you to get up, or to run, or do anything but sit there and stare at him with gaunt eyes. Maybe it was foolish of him to think that merely freeing you of your restraints was doing his part for the greater good.

“Is there anywhere around here where you can go?” he asked. “An inn? A cantina?”

You snorted. “No. I’ll die.”

“You can get food and medicine out there.”

“Mos Eisley is swarming with Durant’s men,” you explained. “The minute I step foot in any town or port here, they’ll know.”

Maybe being with Grogu had softened him, or maybe The Mandalorian genuinely couldn’t find it himself to leave you. But, he found himself doing the unthinkable: sticking his hand out to you, lifting you up, and leading you out of the docking bay and back towards his ship. He didn’t know what he was going to do or how he was going to do it but really, he hadn’t thought that far ahead. His main focus had been on keeping you alive until you were within the safety of the Crest.

You stumbled slightly when he put you down, tripping and falling towards the control panel to shut the loading bay doors. At least you were intuitive.

With that, you fell back to the ground. It was becoming clearer and clearer that you were in a bit of a state - how long did you say it had been? A week since Durant had left - so that was at least seven days without proper food or water. It was a miracle you were alive. Din had got there just in time.

“Why are you helping me?” you asked. “What do you want?”

He glanced over in your direction. “I don’t want anything.”

“I don’t believe that for a second,” you shot back.

“I wasn’t going to leave you there,” Din replied. He paused for a moment, before turning to face you. “I’ve heard Durant’s name before. I know what he does to people.”

“Aren’t you more worried about finding him and getting the bounty?” you pushed.

Truth be told, Din wasn’t that bothered. He had enough money from the last four pucks to get him where he needed to be. The fifth had just been a little extra, so he had an easier time letting go of it. He certainly wasn’t the only hunter going after Durant’s ass and worst case scenario, Karga would give him a little bit of shit for not completing the job. All of that was a lot more manageable than living with the guilt of leaving you in the dark to die.

“Someone else will get him. I’m sure.” Din muttered. He reached for a ration pack stored away on a shelf and tossed it in your direction. “You should eat this. I’ll get us in the air and find some bacta-”

“- you really don’t need to,” you cut him off.

“Eat,” he pushed again. “You’re weak. You’ll need it.”

--

Over the next few days, you would come to find that forceful-but-caring demands were The Mandalorian’s main language.

He didn’t talk much - or at all really. He didn’t need to, not when you kept to yourself on the lower deck of the ship whilst he dealt with everything else. He didn’t seem to mind that you weren’t helping; after all, you’d been in a weak state when Din had found you and standing up had been hard, let alone maneuvering around the flying hunk of metal. You were beginning to feel a little more spry, thanks to the food, water and bactaspray. The combination was hardly an elixir of life but you’d found yourself feeling a little more human.

Sleep was the hard one. A combination of confusion - at the situation, at Din, at where you were going - and nightmares made it hard. Every time you closed your eyes, you found yourself hurtling back in time to when Durant had first captured you. You’d been a test dummy for all his weapons and experiments and really, you were just lucky to be alive and in one piece. It didn’t count for much though, not when you couldn’t get a single fucking second of shut eye.

You would have been a fool to think that Din hadn’t picked up on it.

He was observational by nature and even more so by craft. A man who was constantly looking over his shoulder and straight ahead; a warrior who had been raised to keep a weapon by his side at all times. Of course he was going to notice your insomnia, and the way your eyes seemed even more sunken and dull than when he’d first found you.

You were sitting in the hull when he approached you. Not a lot had been said, other than the occasional eat this or put this on your bruises. Again - all a little forceful, but with a sense of genuinity behind the words. You still had a hard time believing that he was legitimately just a man who wanted to help you.

“I find that noise helps.”

You glanced up at him. “I’m sorry?”

He cleared his throat. “When I can’t sleep, and when I have nightmares, I find that being in a room with white noise helps distract my brain.”

“Oh, right,” you gave him a small nod. “I s’pose it is pretty quiet down here.”

“It’s noisier up there in the cockpit,” he replied. “We’re going to be in hyperspace for a while so if you want to get some sleep, I’ll stay down here.”

“Thank you.”

For the first time in days, you finally showed a glimmer of emotion. It was just a smile - and one he figured was a forced one - but still, it was a good sign.

Din’s eyes followed you as you stood up, heading for the ladder up to the cockpit. You stopped in front of it for a moment, palms wrapping around one of the rungs. At first, he thought you were just pondering, or taking a moment to rethink your actions, but then a light bulb went off in his head. You were too weak.

Moving slowly, The Mandalorian positioned himself behind you.

“Is it okay if I put them here?” he quietly asked, large, gloved hands hovering over the side of your hips.

“Uh, yeah,” you replied. “Thank you.”

With Din’s support, you were able to grab onto the hatch above and pull yourself up, boots hitting the ground of the cockpit. He followed you up, guiding you over to one of the pilot’s chairs. The lights of hyperspace were flashing by, illuminating the entire room in a white-gold glow. It felt odd to be up here after so many days of confining yourself just to the hull - forbidden, even with the invite from The Mandalorian himself.

“How did you know that I get nightmares?” you asked, turning around to face him.

The helmet tilted slightly. “I get them too.”

“I’m sorry,” you softly sighed. “Thank you again for your help.”

“It’s okay,” Din brushed it off as though it were nothing. “We have about four hours til our next stop. I’ll wake you up before we get there.”

“Is that where I get off?” you asked.

“No,” he firmly replied. “It’s not safe there either.”

You had more questions that you wanted to ask - now more than ever that he was finally talking - but you were far too exhausted to even try. Once you’d fallen back against the chair and been handed a blanket out of nowhere, the noise of the surrounding machines practically dragged you out of consciousness.

---

One question you had wanted to ask Din had been about the duration of your stay.

How long were you supposed to stay on board? How long did he want you there?

You were almost scared to ask, for fear of the answer. After all, you barely knew him. He could get up at any moment and demand that you left, and you wouldn’t have been able to argue. All of this - this looking after you, this roof over your head, this care - felt too good to be true. Like it was all part of some elaborate ruse.

But it was funny, because you were even more scared that it wasn’t. If Din - or The Mandalorian, as you knew him - was truly just a nice person with pure intentions, then that was about to be dangerous territory for you. The minute that you started trusting him, and the minute you started to see him as someone who could protect you, would spell trouble. You had never intended to become attached, but it was only natural. You hadn’t had a single person look out for you - not once in your life.

Every time he made you food, or helped you up into the cockpit, you felt yourself slipping that way. A six-foot pile of beskar should not have been a sign of comfort, but the helmet came to symbolise...something. You didn’t know what. Attachment, maybe? A little inkling of affection for whoever the hell was below those inches of steel?

A few weeks passed and the tension slowly began to falter. It was probably the proximity more than anything, but the time proved to you more than anything that Din was genuine. He was helping you because he wanted to - there was no personal gain for him, nor monetary. He actually, honestly just wanted to do good.

And doing good, he was. Whilst he still kept his distance, he looked after you. He made sure that you ate enough to recover from your periods of deprivation and once a day, he would clear out of the cockpit for you to get some rest. He still helped you up the ladder every time -and even when you told him you were strong enough, he still stood back and watched just to make sure.

Because, truthfully, The Mandalorian was beginning to see something in you. He couldn’t quite put his finger on what, but he was intrigued by the way you were slowly beginning to show him parts of yourself. Where your eyes had once been gaunt and lifeless, they now had a spark in them. You were quiet when you’d met, but now you spoke to the kid and you hummed to yourself. It was like the life that was sucked out of you was slowly being breathed back in, day by day and bit by bit.

“Do you wanna get some sleep?” Din asked you one day.

“Yeah, sure,” you glanced up at the Child, giving him a small smile. “When did you last sleep, Mando?”

Another helmet tilt. “I get enough sleep.”

“I don’t believe you,” you thinned your eyes at him.

The Mandalorian sighed slightly - normally, that would have been a sign to literally anyone else to drop it. But with you? Nope. You saw that as a sign of progress; that the little, tiny display of emotion meant you were beginning to chip past those godforsaken layers of beskar.

“I get nightmares about Durant,” you continued. “Every time I panic and wake up in a cold sweat, I remind myself that I’m safe, because I know that you and the kid are here.”

“You do?”

“Yeah,” you admitted. “You can tell me anything and I promise I won’t judge you. You’ve never judged me.”

He pondered for a moment, before releasing another deep breath. “I can’t sleep alone.”

“Really?”

“Last time I did, I woke up and my parents were gone,” Din explained. “So I wait til the kid wants to go to sleep and I just go with him, so that I’m not alone.”

Your heart dropped a little at that - partially because he’d opened up to you, but also because the Child rarely ever slept. If Din only ever waited around for their exhaustion to coincide, it must have been months since he’d last got a decent night’s rest. It was the least he deserved.

Nodding, you stuck your hand out towards him. “C’mon.”

“What?”

“I’m gonna sleep and so are you,” you replied. “You need it and if I’ve done everything that you’ve instructed so far, I think I should have the same in return.”

--

Din didn’t want to admit it to himself at first.

It being multiple things: the fact you were helping him, the fact your presence on his ship had made the place seem better, the fact that his heart skipped a beat every time you brushed past him.

Bar his surrogate son, Din had never been close with anyone before. He’d never even slept in the same goddamn room as anyone else, even. That was a fucking mammoth step for him, but when you took his hand? It felt like a baby step. Just a tiny hop from A to B. Not a massive milestone, or a moment of personal progress. You had made it seem so simple.

Maybe that was it.

You never over-complicated anything. Your intentions were always clear and simple - there was no moral ambiguity, no moments where Din had to question whether or not he could well and truly trust you. He just knew. It was funny, because it was the exact same situation you’d had with him - questioning why he was helping you, trying to work out what he wanted. This whole time, Din had been helping you solely because he thought it was the right thing and it’s what you were doing for him too.

Din liked when you sat close to him. There was a little wave of warmth he felt every time you shuffled a bit nearer to him when you both crashed on the floor of the cockpit, and a tiny swarm of butterflies that flew through him when you stuck by his side in busy towns and cities. It was clear that you found comfort in him after so many years of going without it.

In turn, he found comfort in you. Not just in the way you unintentionally looked after him, but just...everything. Your presence had been a little odd on the Crest at first, but now it felt weird to be without it. Hearing you single quietly in the shower and have one-sided conversations with the Child filled a hole in his life that he hadn’t even realised had been there.

It was as though he’d had a missing puzzle piece his entire life; a gap between all the interconnected parts that hadn’t been integral, but certainly inconvenient. And now that it was filled, he could take a step back and finally look at the bigger picture that had been forming. All the pieces were finally there - you and the kid and whatever odd family unit that made you - and the galaxy didn’t seem so nonsensical anymore.

A little over two months after he first found you, word got around that Durant had finally been captured. Not by Din, but that hadn’t mattered - because killing the man who had hurt you, even after everything, would never amount to everything he’d done for you.

The relief didn’t last long for you, though - because as soon as you realised you no longer had a reason to hide, it dawned on you that you no longer had a reason to stay with Din. Or, at least not one you were willing to share with Din. Begging to let you stay just for the sake of being near him didn’t seem like a very convincing argument - at least not from where you were standing.

But from where Din was standing, it was a little different. You were part of his life now, even if you had no idea. That wasn’t your fault, though. He wasn’t exactly the best at vocalising it. Admitting it to himself had been hard enough, let alone to you.

“So,” you spoke softly, clearing your throat. “I suppose you’ll drop me off at the next planet?”

You were both sitting in the cock-pit; the Child was asleep downstairs and the Crest was soaring through the last stretch of hyperspace before Nevarro.

Din didn’t want to drop you off. He didn’t want his ship to be silent all over again or to sleep without you by his side. The thought alone of not having you around anymore was enough to make him a little watery-eyed beneath his beskar barrier. You’d grown on him, and in return, he’d kind of, accidentally fallen in love with you.

“You don’t have to go,” he said.

You peered over at him. “If you can think of a reason for me to stay aboard, please do let me know.”

“I want you to stay,” Din replied. He gently reached out a hand and took it in his - it was the first time that he’d given you such a vast gesture. “Isn’t that reason enough?”

“Yeah,” you smiled. “It is.”

--

Staying aboard the Razor Crest was one of the best decisions you’d ever made.

Not only because it meant you were well and truly safe, but because Din’s direct request was a sign to you that you weren’t imagining things. Whatever attachment you felt to him, he felt it too - but it ran deeper than that. There was a mutual concern and respect for one another. Something born of two lifetimes spent on their own, finally coming together in one.

Things had been a little slow before then; the way that you danced around each other, like two magnets that were meant to come together - just with a little hesitancy. There had been a lot of late nights and long trains of thought about the signals that the other was giving off; about whether you’d misinterpreted the way his hands lingered over yours, or the way you’d practically passed out on his shoulder.

But, after that - after Din had openly asked you to stay, and you’d happily agreed, things began to move a little faster. Where you’d once been slowly walking down that hill and towards each other, you were now slipping, tripping and falling.

With each passing night, you inched closer towards each other. God forbid you ever found out, but Din even found himself pushing the pilot’s chairs closer to each other when you weren’t in the room, just so he could properly feel you next to him when you dozed off. He enjoyed your presence at the best of times but it was those dark, quiet moments when he genuinely and fully needed you.

It came to a head one night when you’d laid down with the Child beside you - not upstairs in the cockpit, but in the tiny cot in the hull of the ship.

There wasn’t room for one person, let alone one person and a tiny creature. Even worse, for two people - one in a beskar suit - and the creature. It just didn’t work. It shouldn’t have worked.

But where there’s a will, there’s a way, and the moment that Din saw you dead to the world with the Child in your arms, he was certain that he was going to make it work. Maybe with a bit of reshuffling there, and if he just moved the kid here - and that was when Grogu bit him pretty hard on the finger.

Disregarding his reshuffling plan, he knew there was only one option left.

It was something he’d never dreamt of doing before, simply for how terrifying and exposing it was - but he took one glance at you, and once glance at his kid, and he knew it was going to be worth it in the long run. It was merely a necessary step to getting closer to you - physically, mentally emotionally.

You stirred slightly at the sound of metal clattering to the floor - not enough to wake up, but enough to be a little more aware of the room around you. A moment later, there was a quiet hiss, and then everything went black.

In your sleepy state, your brain reacted a little slowly - but then the mattress beneath you dipped, and you felt someone’s skin against yours. Not just skin, but stubble against the back of your head as he pressed a kiss to it, and warm fingers tangling with yours.

“The armour,” you murmured. “You took it off.”

“It was the only way,” he softly replied. “It’s okay. Go back to sleep.”

“Okay,” you let out a sleepy hum. “Good night…”

“Din,” he quietly said.

“Good night, Din.”

[absolutebl]

Hi friend

This isn't directly related to bl so feel free not to respond ( I'd love it if u do tho)

How in the world do u manage to find time to watch so many things and catch up each week. College has started and I also have work and I can't even finish watching one single show😔.

Been stuck on Dark Blue Kiss for more than a week now.

And you maintain such a detailed blog toooo!!!

I really do admire u🥺💞

Ah. Well I live the blessed life of someone who works very very hard with only one goal in mind.

Freedom from obligations.

Which is to say, I’m a workaholic who has chosen not to marry or procreate, and my parents are still relatively autonomous and independent. I’ve had at least a part time job of some kind or another since I was 12 (my parents are both laborers with strong work ethics) and I genuinely enjoy working. 

I feel no need to own expensive objects or large things, including a house or car. I don’t like or collect *stuff* of any kind and my living expenses are extremely low (being mostly vegetarian helps with that). I live rent controlled and the only things I really spend money on are eating out and travel. Most of the time I combo travel with a conference and manage to get someone to pay the flight portion as a business trip, and the rest becomes a business expense.

Instead I do crazy shit like save most (and invest some) of my money. I don’t buy anything on debt. Even when I was getting an education I did work study, and then took time in between my degrees to work in industries I hated but were lucrative in order to pay back my debt. I should say, that while I grew up poor I didn’t grow up below the poverty line, so I’ve never not had my basic needs met. And while I don’t have much family, I am very rich in friends, so I’ve always had a safety net, although now I kinda am the safety net. But I was never truly disadvantaged in life. 

I’ve built myself up as an expert freelancer in a very specific niched field that has to do with data analysis and has made me one of the few people able to do what I do. I can set my own hours and (basically) set my own price. It helps that I have the kind of brian that likes statistics, numbers, and data a whole lot. It also helps that I can apply that brain to my own finances, business, and lifestyle without feeling constrained. I’m always turning down jobs and putting projects on the back burner because I’m already committed. 

But I’m my own boss which means that I can work when, how, and where I want to. Live frugally and take off time when I feel like it with no obligation or guilt. 

It also means I can structure my day around BL, and type happily away at this dumb blog because if, later, for any reason I have to work spreadsheets or a keynote until 2 am, that’s fine too. 

It works really well for me and my personality, but it does require a lot of self discipline, so I know it’s not for everyone. But I can recommend the lifestyle. I get to be one of those things most other people I know struggle with: content. 

I guess that’s my secret. 

Happiness is a crap shoot, mostly transient and erratic, but contentment is an achievable goal. 

Aim for autonomy and contentment. 

Then you can watch all the BL you want whenever you want to. 

Oh.. yeah. I also watch a lot of shows at 1.25-1.5x speed. And can crunch numbers and run regressions etc.. while I watch. So. There’s that too. 

[han-shinsuke]

ɢᴇᴛᴏ sᴜɢᴜʀᴜ x ғᴇᴍ ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

Desperate to burden you more with thoughts and a few of his hard rubbing, Geto places himself between your legs and rubs his tip against your flushed lips down there, throwing you on the edge of torturous sensation. “Ge–Geto... please...” when he gets his desired reaction from you, a low chuckle emerges from him. To his kind, hearing a lady moaned softly was rewardingly good. And you did good, moaning his name like that.

🔞🌹 “does it hurt?” his tune was different compared to the normal tone he uses in class. There was a faint smell of concern in it and for a second, you wanted to believe that he cares for you for having his thing installed balls deep into you. The sheet is wet and so the pillow case where you had been muffling your moans and tears. You cried out the pain, digging your nails against your own flesh since your hands were tied behind your back while he was there, above your bareback, big hands gripping tightly on your waist as he makes sure you’d be filled with his arousal. One more long and strong push of his hips, you found yourself trembling from pain and an ounce of pleasure from his final assault. Geto withdrawn his shaft from your swollen anusx and he carefully rolled you on your back, checking your condition. “Does it hurt?” as if to make fun of your struggles, he asks again, swiping his thumb against your swollen lips. This may sounds funny but you couldn’t help but asked yourself if there were any part of you that hadn’t been touched and sucked by him. Probably, there’s none. Because Geto Suguru never missed. Putting your state in consideration, he feels obliged to answer his own inquiry, “of course, it hurts. I was your first, ms. front row.” You stared at his face, drained and in pain. If only you could wipe his smirk off his handsome face, you would. Sadly, you can’t. You need to stabilize your breathing and regain some energy in order to leave his estate. Though it feels impossible but you must. “G–get off me.” You gave him an undisturbed look, thinking of some effective ways to get to the bus station to not miss its last trip. Desperate to burden you more with thoughts and a few of his hard rubbing, Geto places himself between your legs and rubs his tip against your flushed lips down there, throwing you on the edge of torturous sensation. “Ge–Geto... please...” when he gets his desired reaction from you, a low chuckle emerges from him. To his kind, hearing a lady moaned softly was rewardingly good. And you did good, moaning his name like that. “Here’s the money,” again, the guilt was eating you up. Geto hands you the amount you both agreed on. You were no different from those department harlots who jumped on men like Suguru. “I’ll shower first, just wait here.” You got no time to waste so when he enters the bathroom, you put on your crumpled uniform, left his huge bedroom, painfully went through wide hallways and numerous staircases. As you stared back at the tall and automated gate, another slap from reality had hit you hard. Suguru Geto is reality miles away from the mud you’re in. You have reached the station on time. Luckily, the last bus hasn’t arrived yet so you took the chance to sleep in the shed. Fuck life. It will take a dozen of painkiller to calm your wrecked flesh and disturbed nerves, you thought. 🌹 “Your balance has been settled, Ms. Y/N.” The registrar shows you the updated payment of your account and you were not happy or pleased by it. You had someone in mind and just the thought of it, you can feel the anger and insult building inside of you. As usual, he’s there, surrounded by his kind. Women lurking around him as if they are there like an options for Geto to pick who knows who. He raises an arm, waving at you. You answered by nodding your head. Your knuckles turned white as he flashes you an innocent grin. The chair on the front row creates a screeching noise as you sat on it. You were so mad right now. Maybe throwing a shoe to his direction can lessen the fuming anger in you but you’re not that kind of person. You settled things privately. Just wait, Geto. You fucking wait and I’ll burn you alive. “Happy Birthday,” a hand put a protein bar and a can of chilled coffee on your desk. There’s no need to look at the giver. The bite mark on his wrist is enough to identify him. You were the one who put it on him last night. Your gaze follows Geto’s back as he returns to the back row. The place where strength and power lies. At twenty, you sold your dignity to

Geto Suguru. Now that you turned twenty one, you have promised that would be the first and last time you’ll use your innocence to overcome a problem. 🌹 “You’ve paid me well, Suguru, but I don’t accept tip for my service.” He didn’t speak. He must be in a state of shock after receiving a slap from you. After the exam, you confronted him and lashed out your anger from his doings. “I’m returning the money you had given last night. Thank you for the kind gesture.” You said in a very sarcastic tone. 🌹🔞 Suguru Geto is an heir. Unlike the other, he has no records of bad memories or any sad untold stories. The life his parents had given him was very ideal and perfect. He has friends and loved by many. And from those infos, you have come up with a thought that maybe, due to the perfectly laid out plan of his life, Suguru is trying to create a fault in his flawless existence. A fault that made you so eager to avoid him, that no matter where you tried to look at it, you’re a trial for him. Would he mind if you’ll be found in front of his doorstep, soaking and looks like a real shit? Well, that’s what he was looking for! A shit to jump in! “Geto!” he looks beautiful when he opened the door for you. The spotless white shirt he was wearing is now covered with dirt. Suguru returns your action, hugging you close against his body. “What happened?” his question after closing the door. Instead of answering, you just tightened the embrace around him and bit your lips to suppress your cry. “No–nothing... I’m sorry for barging in so late at night.” You tried to sound convincing and smiled. Your hand reached for the knob but Geto pulls you back, cupping your face between his warm hands. That’s the moment you gave in, face contorting as you cried helplessly while gripping his shirt. That’s all you need. Someone who can ask with sympathy. Someone who cares. For now, Suguru seems to care for you that’s why you let yourself cried in front of him. That moment, he looks and he feels like someone you can rely on with all the shits happening around you. You told him everything in details, not missing a part of it. You slept with him in exchange of some bucks. Gave your innocence with the man you thought who deserves it and that was him, Suguru Geto. Rather than selling it with your obsessed landlord, who also threatened to kill you if you refuse to bed him, you ran for your life, escaping the hell hole you have been in. You just wanted to graduate in college, make it until graduation but life have forced you to your limit. “I would rather die than to sleep with a psycho,” you confessed to him. You needed money and without those shit, you will not make it. You were so desperate to live. So desperate for a safe environment. You couldn’t even call your parents and tell them about your misfortunes for they are as well struggling to live, to sustain their needs. “You can stay here,” suddenly he suggested. “For free. No hidden charges.” He jokes. “I will be useful.” You ensures him. “You’re already are.” Geto smiles, tucking your hair behind your right ear. 🌹🔞⚠️ Whe he says, no hidden charges, there were really not. Guess, he doesn’t like the idea of tasting the same food he had before. You have been living with him for almost a month now but he’s not making a move to you. He lends you a spacious room and that made you felt lonely and cold. There was a time when Suguru brought a woman from the engineering department and you happened to witness their make out session in the kitchen one night. You were so embarrassed then apologized to them. As of the moment, you’re in the barn house, feeding his two pet horses while wearing the dress that Geto bought for you. “Y/N–” he swallows his words upon seeing you leaning forward in one of the stables, reaching the harness to check it. Suguru grits his teeth, seeing your thighs and curves are too much for him. Suddenly, he regretted purchasing the cerulean dress that fits perfectly on you. Your throat felt dry. You were familiar with the heat oozing from his

gaze. You’ve seen that during your first time with him. He walks to you, grabbing your hand, dragging you to the second level of the barn where you were slammed against the wooden wall. You cried in pain but immediately silenced by rough and hungry kisses of Suguru. At first, you couldn’t find the will to kiss him back but by just a lick on your bottom lip, you found yourself opening up for him, tilting your head to the side to give him easy access to your mouth. “Geto... ” his name slipped from your lips, pushing your own tongue into his, determined to play with his expert ones. He hummed between the kiss, supporting your chin through his forefinger. Suguru is really tall that you had to tiptoe to reach his mouth and kiss him back with same intensity. You gathered up enough courage and Suguru, himself, didn’t saw it coming. You caught him by surprised, pulling him down to you to suck on his bottom lip and lick it afterwards. “Fuck, babe.” He breathes when you released his mouth. Time for another surprise, you guided him to the nearest storage box and motioned to sit. You stopped him in the middle because you had to remove his pants and boxers. As soon as he settled, naked, Suguru holds your hair for you when you started sucking his thing. His moans and heavy breaths filled the space and your wet sucking sounds rings louder as he guides your face up and down to his erection covered in your saliva. You raised a hand when his grip tightened on your hair, almost like crashing your mouth with his hard and thick head that had been knocking your pipe pretty hard every time he goes balls deep in your mouth. You coughed helplessly as he frees you, gagging from the overwhelming thickness of his manhood. Geto cups your face and stares at you with malice before kissing you torridly, so eager to drown you with his lips and tongue that you accepted wholeheartedly. “Can I fuck you against the wall and tie you up as well?” a part of you shivered but you didn’t say ‘no’. He takes that as a ‘yes’ so you watched yourself slowly levitating from being tied up and held possessively by Suguru’s strong arms. You gasped for air when he enters your pretty tight hole in one swift push and managed to knock against your womb. “You’re so big, Geto aah!” your head fell back, the feeling of his throbbing manhood inside you is suffocating. You gasped again, sweats rolling down your neck as you let yourself adjust from his size. Geto licks your collarbone, nipping his lips against your skin up to your neck where he gets a taste of your tears and sweats, “really? You think I’m big? I feel honoured, babe.” He sucks the hollow on your neck and pulls slowly. Your eyes widened, feeling how a simple movement can stretch your rim wide open. “Aahhnnggg~ Ge–Getooo... ” You tugged your arms against the shackles, another pain inflicted upon you. And then there’s another pain, and it was a long one. He pushes fast, stretching you inside by installing deep inside of you, causing your hips to tremble when he smacks your ass and gropes you hard. As you can noticed, Suguru was being careful not to ruin the dress, the straps were rolled down just below your shoulder and he perfectly exposes your breasts, nipplesx really hard and red. For the second time in a row, your head fell back when he dips down your chest, sucking in a nipplesx while swirling his tongue around it. Geto. Geto. You went crazy and delirious. He’s attending your needy titsx with his thirsty mouth, biting the skin around it then going back to sucking the two buds alternately like a child. When he’s done showering your bosoms with attention, Suguru goes back to pushing further inside you, pulling his shaft roughly and then again, he never gets tired rutting you with his thing, slamming your hips against his hips. He was using different paces in stretching you wide so when he feels your breathing returning to normal, he would suddenly thrust his rod in and out of you roughly, making you gasp for air. “My arms feels numb, Geto ooohhh god!” you cried again, bursting into tears

when you felt him grinding his hips against yours while unloading his jizz. He stops moving for awhile but his loads are still oozing from his tip. “Okay, babe aahh~ hold tight.” Geto says, removing the shackles then locking your arms around his neck. Just when you thought it’s over, he lays you on the dust covered floor, folds you in half, hips ramming deep as he continues spilling his seeds into your cunt. He shoots you, with his long strings of arousal, fucked hard in a breathless mating press position. You’re just a dust in Suguru Geto’s universe. 🌹 Your surrounding turned pitch black with scattered stars in the night sky. You expected the moon to smile down at you but it was the greater creation who have his eyes on you. Universe taking his time looking at a particular dust. “where are we heading to?” you asked, blinking. He stops to carry you properly in his arms before answering, “home, Y/N.” Your eyes fell to the place you’ve been to. The door was left unlocked. “You forgot to lock the barn, Geto.” “They would not think of escaping, babe. They’re drawn to me and they are loyal to me.” You turned to the night sky once again, mesmerized by its beauty, you asked him a weird question, “since the door isn’t locked, then I’m free to go whenever I want to?” “Well, if it’s about you leaving my land, then expect some changes in the security. I can be selfish at times, Y/N.” “What do you meant by that, Geto?” “I just don’t think I’m capable of letting you go anymore.” ❤️

[aithne]

Domestic dystopia:

I've just gotten back from traveling for a week. I feel kinda awful, but I'm not sure if I am jet lagged or have the plague. I'm isolating anyway. I'm hoping to get test kits in the mail tomorrow so I can see how worried I should be.

I get up and boil a big pot of water to use later to wash dishes because one of the city's water treatment plants went offline yesterday and we're under a boil water order. At least this time the power's still on--unlike last time.

There are a bunch of substitutions in my grocery delivery order but only a couple of things outright missing. I'm hugely pleased by this--I got bread and even a couple of gallons of bottled water to replenish the supply I'm about to go through (see boil water order, above).

I need to do a serious supply run tomorrow if I'm just jet lagged--we're in danger of another set of bad storms that will smash into the city's decaying infrastructure and leave us out of power and water for an undetermined length of time. I research how to turn off my hot water heater, just in case.

I scroll through my city's subreddit and Nextdoor to look for any news that I need to know. The "official" news sources are slow, hard to navigate, and don't have the advantage of local experts weighing in on stories. (Plumbers in particular are very useful people to opine on cold-weather posts, oddly enough.)

I'm editing pictures from my trip. It's likely the last time I'll have a vacation for several years, and I only went this time because it was my parents' 50th wedding anniversary and they really wanted all the kids there. Even I am not immune to parental guilt.

I've got some Gatorade in the pantry. Maybe I'm just dehydrated.

[wizkiddx]

worst case scenario part 5

finally!! so sorry its been an age to anyone still here but lives been interesting atm so....  also this really feels a bit rambley and the ending is deff underdeveloped but I just kind of wanted this done tbh x 

[previous part] [part 1] 

warnings:  hospitals - ICU, ventilation that sort of stuff, just a lot of ANGST post a difficult birth - please don't read if this could be upsetting for you, and my inbox is always open if u wanna chat :) 

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In a complete 360 degree flip from earlier that day, after leaving the hospital Tom had become obsessively attached to Aurora. They’d got back to his parents place in Tom’s car; Aurora in the carseat Y/n and Tom had ready in their car door for her arrival. Clearly his parents had already pre-warned his brothers, who had thankfully already gone over to Tom and Y/n’s - collecting the Moses basket amongst other items Harry had been listed off from his mother. 

Apart from explaining a little behind her name to his parents on the journey back, Tom had spoken very little, choosing to keep himself to himself - physically stationing himself beside the Moses basket the whole time. Of course, there had been a bit of light conversation and almost procedural passing round of Aurora between all her uncles and grandparents, which Tom had kept a wether eye on - but ultimately not engaged. 

He also knew that physically his body was failing him. Although eating a little of the lasagne Sam had made for everyone, he could only stomach a minuscule amount, which did little to boost his energy levels. It felt as though sleeping was the enemy, because he was neither ready to leap into the car if the phone went; or to hear the smallest sound from the wicker basket, suggesting something was wrong. So as much as he tried to fight it, before even nine o’clock he began to dose off on the familiar couch of his parents sitting room - occasionally jerking himself awake before loosing the fight once again.

Nikki had tried to gently push him to take a break in the spare bedroom, which had been Tom’s before he’d moved out, but was unsuccessful - every time he retaliated with a stern shake of his head, while checking his phone just in case he’d missed a notification. Eventually Nikki relented, later in the evening both her and Dom retiring to bed; once Sam had agreed to stick around downstairs till a bit later - as a chef he worked till late in the nights, so even on his days off like today, his sleep schedule was just a little fucked. 

Left alone with his new little niece and now pretty firmly asleep brother, Sam draped a blanket over the latter just in time for Aurora to start fussing in the need of a bottle. His mum had explained how to do everything, how to mix the formula and heat it up, so after scooping up the little wriggling girl in the hope his brother wouldn’t get disturbed, Sam dealt with her. To be honest no matter how clueless and useless he felt, Aurora was just so cute - if a little wrinkly and alien looking, but in a good way. This was the first baby any of them had had, so the first time Sam experienced this instant connection and love for the little being that was his niece or nephew. It was terrifying, lifting the bottle against her lips for the first time, but then it just sort of seemed to work. She was incredibly smart for less than 24 hours old, instantly latching on, like she had done for Haz at the hospital. 

That gave Sam a little confidence in his ability as an uncle, giving himself a satisfied nod while swaying from the kitchen to move back into the living room. It was just a preference to be within reach of Tom… just in case. His poor brother still hadn’t moved, slumped against the corner of the sofa, leaning toward the now empty Moses basket. Normally, Sam seeing his supposed heart throb of a brother looking as rough as he did now - double chin, mouth hanging slightly open, deep sunken eyes - he would’ve taken a photo to blackmail him with. Now though, it was just desperately sad, seeing his brother like this, hand still clutching his phone tightly above the blanket. 

Rather hoping the calm would last for a while, Sam successfully finished off feeding Aurora; winded and then put her down to sleep again just in time. Because, perhaps expectedly, Tom’s phone began to blare off the default iPhone ringtone making Tom jump and throw the device across the room as he awoke with a start. Sam ran to grab it off the floor, mainly with the hope of turning it off before Aurora was awoken too - knowing that it was best tonight to tackle one thing at a time. 

And so he immediately swiped to answer the call, not even registering who the call was from, much rather just wanting the noise to stop. 

“Hello?”

“Sam? It’s Harrison” Tom had jumped up from his seat hovering beside Sam with petrified look. It took barely seconds for Tom to snatch the phone back, launching questions down the receiver. 

“Slow down would you? Y/n is fine I was just phoning to check in.”

“Oh er yeh… um sorry I just… just thought…”

“It’s the other way mate. Nurse says she’s starting to get there cos first she moved her arm a bit when we pinched her shoulder and then I just called because she started to like gag and now the ventilator thing is gone.”

“W-what?”

“I think she’s breathing by herself? Like she’s got an oxygen mask instead of the tubes down her throat.” Clearly Harrison was not, by any means, a medical expert. 

“They said she would have the ventilator for a few days at least.”

“I guess Y/n got bored? To be fair she couldn’t ever sit still.”

“I’m coming to you.”

“Tom it’s nearly midnight, I was supposed to be kicked out at 10. Just come back in the morning, they won’t let you in I’m pretty certain.”

“What if she wakes up!”

“Then they’ll call you! She’s getting better Tom you should be try and relax for like a second.”

“FUCK OFF HAZ! If she wakes up all alone and terrified then-“

“I’m not going to having a screaming match on the phone with you. I think we both know you wanting to come is more for you than for Y/n, because Y/n would want you to be looking after Aurora.”

Again guilt tripping using the newborn. Harsh but effective. Stopping Tom’s anger dead in it’s tracks.

“Look I can put the nurse on for her to tell you they won’t let you in and they’ll call if anything happens - but you already know that.”

“Yeh sorry fine … I know don’t bother.”

“Okay… I’m was gonna head back to my place and I know you’ve probably got your mum begging to fuss over Aurora but if-“

“Can you come?”

“Didn’t need to ask mate.”

And that’s how the night went. Until Harrison arrived at the Holland family home, Tom had spent the time pacing back and forth, blatantly ignoring the pleas of Sam just to sit down. Once he arrived though, going through all the updates in a lot more detail Tom seemed, for the first time, optimistic. By no means could you call him relaxed or happy - but compared to the rollercoaster that had been the last 24 hours, Harrison thought that was more than enough. Aurora had started fussing again at 1 but by the time it had turned into a full blown scream at Tom, Sam already had the bottle ready. It took a little bit of encouragement and promise that Tom would be able to feed her but actually, she instantly latched on, settled in her Dad’s hold while guzzling down the contents of the bottle. 

After a bit of winding she ended up falling asleep on her dads chest, only when he felt himself start to flag did Tom place her back in the basket. Harrison and him ended up crashing on the sofas, Sam retiring to his own room. Phone still tightly clutched in Tom’s grip.

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The first thing Y/n became properly aware of was this intense heaviness all over her body. It felt as though her limbs were all composed completely of lead, meaning as much as she was just craving rolling over, it was as though her own body was holding her down. A very alien feeling that unsettled her slightly, trying to shake of the misty feeling in her head to work it all out. It took a while to drag herself out of the depths of sleep, to the point where background noise slowly faded in - an alien beeping as well as distant shuffling making her heart thump with unease. Finally, perhaps most distressingly , her eyes felt glued shut. Not because they were heavy, in the way someone extremely sleep deprived cant keep their eyes open; rather stiff like they hadn’t been used in so long they’d rusted over or something. 

The feeling  was quite horrific and isolating- as though she were locked into her body without an escape in sight. Whilst trying to calm her racing thoughts, Y/n chose to focus completely on the one thing she could do. She could listen. She listened to the beeps, focusing on the type of sound, the way it chimed so regularly; and it’s form. It was familiar, for that she was sure but for now at least she couldn’t place it. 

It felt like an investigation, trying with all her might to try and workout what the fuck was going on. To put it mildly. 

The most useful clue though, a breakthrough if you will, is when a voice sounded - clear and familiar. 

“Excuse me nurse?” It was Nikki. For sure. It was a clue, but didnt seem to make a hell of a lot of sense. Y/n was so focused on why the hell Nikki was apparently watching her sleep unconscious, she completely missed the reference to the nurse. As in hospital. As in Y/n was in hospital. “… I’m just going to swap out for my sons friend.”

“Harrison?” That voice seemed new and unfamiliar.

“Yes, he won’t be a second I’m sure.”

What was Harrison doing here too? 

It was all very confusing and hurt Y/n’s brain to try and unpick. Gradually then, everything sort of melted away, diving back into the darkness.

The next time Y/n woke up things were different. This time she woke up like she would at any time of day. She woke up and her eyes followed suit. Not particularly easily, since as soon as they cracked open she was almost blinded by brilliant white lights, it taking a build up of willpower before she tried it again - bracing for the pain. 

By now she knew something was wrong. She remembered all these patchy and hazy periods. All full of confusion and disorientation but with different voices keeping her at least semi calm. Familiar voices, all too often laced with such emotion. Especially Tom’s. She couldn’t remember what he had said, nor had she probably been able to understand it at the time - what stuck was the tone. The sadness, the hopelessness , the emptiness. 

It was scary. But it made her want to help. Made her want to open her eyes. 

After wincing at the dazzling white surroundings, Y/n blinked her eyes quickly, in an attempt to get them to adjust quicker. She saw an unfamiliar ceiling, one that was tiled in a similar way to her old school canteen. There was a  weird pressure round her mouth, eyes quickly darting down to see edges of a clear mask pressed up against the bridge of her nose. That wasn’t it though, the further she looked the more her eyes panned down this pale blue blanket, following the outline of her legs to the bottom raised edge of the bed. The hospital bed. 

Her hospital bed. 

As much as she wanted to jump up in panic; physically right now that was an impossibility. So instead, Y/n focused on trying to gleam as much information from the situation. It took a hell of a lot of effort, her muscles literally stiff and ridgid with disuse but with a small groan her neck eventually agreed to follow orders. Just a small tilt to the left and suddenly Y/n felt so much more less panicked. Everything was that bit less scary because there was Tom. 

Admittedly he didn’t look amazing, or even not bad. Tom was sat with his back pressed against the side of chair, so his body faced her. Had he not looked so ruined, Y/n would’ve laughed at the side of his face squashed into the back of the seat. But he did look horrific, for lack of a better word. His brown eyes were locked shut, but also looked puffy and red, while dark at the same time - as though he’d been attempting to gouge his own eyes out prior. He looked like he hadn’t slept in weeks, hence why he had appeared to have collapsed in the arm chair. At least though , he wasn’t in a hospital bed himself.

That was Y/n’s pleasure. 

Her next job was to get her neck muscles to pull her head to the other side. It was a slow wincing gesture, yet she was so aware of another presence that needed to be addressed too. But actually it was 3 people.

Right at the back, a nurse sat on a little spinny chair, scribbling something down in a file of papers but to be quite honest that wasn’t were Y/n’s focus zeroed in on. Instead on Harrison who was sat in chair mirroring Tom, except instead of being passed out asleep he was cradling a baby. Her baby. 

Y/n literally felt her heart in her throat at that point, eye widening almost comically. That was her baby - it must be? The monitors all started to loose their regularity as Y/n threw an uncoordinated limb to that side of the bed- already having realised her throat was way too scratchy to try to say anything comprehensible. 

Immediately that got the attention of both the nurse, who immediately leapt up and called for support, as well as Harrison - who looked like he was seeing a ghost. 

“Oh my-Y/n-?” Luckily he kept the baby safe in his arms rather than dropping her in shock, whilst Y/n kept her eyes locked onto the bundle in his arms. Nodding down, she tried to remove the mask (actually just very slightly knocking it to one side) and attempted to ask of the baby. Her throat, being inhumanly dry and scratchy, didn’t really work but Haz still got the message, scoffing in amazement. 

“Aurora… here’s your mummy.” Harrisons voice was quiet and wavering as he delicately held Aurora against Y/n’s collar bone, the babies little tuft of har tickingling her chin. Now Y/n was crying with happiness, looking up at Haz’s icy blue eyes and questioning her name. Harrison confirmed with another disbelieving whisper, whilst the arm that wasn’t still holding Aurora clasped Y/n’s hand with a death grip. “Tom’s choice.”

The mention of him had both of them shift their gaze across the room to Tom’s chair. Even with all the developments, Tom still seemed completely unaware, fast asleep with the side of his face squished against the back of the chair making his lips slightly askew. Y/n were acutely aware of the small congregation of doctors that had accumulated in the corner of the bay but they seemed to be respectfully waiting before they would prod and poke. Haz went to call Tom’s name, before he could though, Y/n squeezed his arm and minutely shook her head. That wasn’t what the blue eyes boy had been expecting, causing Haz to unfold and bring Aurora back up to his chest as he quirked his eyebrows at her.  

She didnt need to be filled in on the situation to know exactly what was happening. She had no idea why she was in the hospital bed; how long it had been since she’d given birth - but she knew all she needed to. From Harrisons unbelievably shocked face; and from the state of Tom - it hadn’t been good. Her fiancé looked almost ghostly, it seemed evident that he needed her. First then, she gestured to Haz for some water, which after a panicked look to the nurse; then from the nurse to various doctors; she was eventually given permission. 

After somewhat alleviating the sandpaper feeling in her throat, Y/n then croakily asked for a bit of privacy. Right now the doctors all were gawking, Harrison assumed it to be because they’d all led him and Tom to believe she wouldn’t wake up for a while- and even then she was supposed to barely be awake, not able to talk and drink or anything of the sort. With an ecstatic nod Harrison, shuffled out - while doing so prompting the medical people to draw the curtains completely shut round the bay.  

Already Y/n had tears welling up in her eyes, purely because she hated seeing him like this. He just looked so broken and shattered which honestly felt worlds worse than the labour she’d gone through. Her whole body still hurt, stiff and achy for reasons yet to be explained to Y/n. None of that mattered though, as she strained her arm out to the side in order to gently reach his knee that was folded up and sticking out awkwardly at an angle. After swallowing one again, Y/n squeezed round the joint and tried to shake it slightly. Instantly the man jumped up in his seat, heavy eyes blinking quickly and repeatedly as he tried to adjust to the room. 

Being so sleep deprived and stressed out, Tom’s brain was not working normally, instead with a delayed haze as he apparently skipped over Y/n in the bed, rather surveying the the closed curtains and Harrison’s now empty chair. As he was lifting himself to sit more normally up, uncurling from the armchair, was when he noticed the hand on his knee. Breath caught in his chest, Tom instinctively bit his lip as his eyes gradually traced up the hand, to the forearm, up to the shoulder. It felt like a fever dream, as though all it would take is for him to move and she’d slip away again. But there were her green eyes, gleaming in a way that literally lifted a weight from his shoulders. Her smile was tired and a little confused, but so her - after spending days of just seeing all her features lax, Tom swore that it was the most beautiful thing in the world.

Only when Y/n finally croaked out a small ‘hi’ did Tom gain awareness of his body, or rather control of it, enough to leap up and leave over the bed - cradling her face in both his palms. Like a psycho he stared intently, swapping his focus from her left to her right eye like a madman. 

“Your-I-I” He was trying to speak, trying to communicate all the thoughts and regrets of things he wished he’d said to her all at once. Weakly she reached up to fully remove the oxygen mask, dragging It down to below her chin, before squeezing his wrists in comfort. Only then did Tom notice the small puddle that had collected on her cheek, which made him realise he was absolutely bawling. 

“You ‘kay?” Her voice was like sandpaper but everything about her was so completely Y/n and it was just giving Tom this unreal wave of euphoria. Physically incapable of replying, the brunette just scoffed, leaning over the bed even more so he could press his forehead on hers. He was laughing too, the fact she was asking him that seemed so preposterous, given all the tubes and wires attached to her at the moment. It took Y/n squeezing his wrist harder again to make him lean back a little, searching her eyes with his. She seemed so worried; seemed so full of concern - only then did Tom consider quite how much he’d ‘let himself go’ the past couple of days. 

It had been two days since Aurora was born, only 48 hours. But the transformation was mad, none more so than mentally. 48 hours had quite literally changed everything for Tom; changed life forever and himself too. It was showing in his unshaven face, with unwashed  greasy hair, everything just looking ‘tired’.

“‘m just really glad your awake.” It was so honest and sincere it did have Y/n wondering what had happened and for how long. What had she put her fiancé through?

“How long?”

“The worst two and a half days of my life… I got you now though, yeh?” Tom whispered wetly, while stroking the side of her cheek - wiping both his and her tears away.

“Always.”

The doctors and nurses then came in, podding and poking Y/n like no tomorrow while Harrison and Tom stood back a little - excitedly grinning at each other and the sleepy girl Haz was cradling, before Tom stole her off him. There was a momentary sick-to-his-stomach feeling after some of the professionals had cleared, seeing her eyes shut again felt like everything was crashing around him. Thankfully though, one of doctors noticed the look of despair on his face, explaining to the two men that she was just asleep normally. That although sh’ed spent along time unconscious, waking from a medical coma is in itself exhausting. 

After the initial excitement of Y/n waking the next couple of days were pretty samey. She’d been moved down to a normal ward, no longer needed all the incessant bleeping machines but still had to stay in hospital. Tom found it tricky too, he just always felt he needed to be by her side ‘just in case’. In fact, it had been a source of a bit of tension between him and his fiancé - she could see how exhausted he was from looking after Aurora, plus the stress of being in the hospital for hours a day with her. As Y/n got better and more switched on to the state of him, she realised it was inevitable he’d crash at some point.

But after a week and a half in hospital - comprising of a baby, emergency surgery, 3 days on intensive care, followed by 8 on the ward - Y/n was discharged. Nikki and Dom moved in to Y/n and Tom’s place, to provide care support both for Aurora; and Y/n for the rest of her recovery; and secretly Tom for everything he’d been through. 

She was still order on bed rest due to her surgical scars, so Tom and Nikki helped to set her up in the master bedroom as soon as they got in. Of course, everyone was aware of Toms odd mood that day. Until then the only thing he wanted was to get his fiancé back at home with him but now she was over the threshold his excitement and joy appeared to have been zapped out of him. In fact, he’d barely uttered more than a couple sentences. So once Y/n was properly comfortable and Dom had brought Aurora and the cot into the room, Tom’s parents quickly made themselves scarce. 

Tom hadn’t stopped, finding some reason to rummage around in the chest of drawers m while Y/n chewed at her bottom lip, watching him. 

“Tom?” All she got in response was a light hum. “Tom please will you come and sit down for a minute?”

“I just need to-“

“Tom!” Her exclamation finally properly got Tom to listen, jumping round to face her. “Please... please will you just stop for a second?” Y/n’s eyes felt as though they were boring holes in his skull. Really, Tom knew he’d be forced into this at some point because he couldn’t avoid Y/n. She had some power of mind reading over him. So with a defeated nod and sagging shoulders Tom rounded the bed, weaving between his side and Auroras cot - where she was sleeping soundly. 

A silence overcame the room as he heavily planted himself on his side of the bed, mirroring Y/n’s posture leant against the headboard. 

“I think we need to have an honest conversation T.”

“If you want.” Nothing about his reply was the picture of enthusiasm, causing Y/n to hesitate a little. 

“Look I am so beyond grateful for everything you’ve done while I was in hospital... and it doesn’t take a genius to tell you’ve worked yourself half to death-“

“I’m fine-“

“Don’t lie to me. I know you’re trying to protect me but please... will you just talk to me? Honestly?” 

His reply this time wasn’t completely unforeseeable but it still shocked Y/n quite how quickly it happened, especially almost unprovoked. Because that’s all it took for Tom to break, for the past 2 weeks to get their vengance, for all the repressed emotion to escape. 

He was crying- well more accurately sobbing- into his hands, his back quaking. Naturally Y/n reached out to pull him into her side, suppressing the groan of pain as she moved a little too much for her abdomen to handle. “I’m here T. I got you and I’m not going anywhere m‘kay?” 

And that’s how they stayed, for at least 10 minutes, with Tom crying into her shoulder as Y/n rubbed up and down his back. Eventually though, everything did calm down and Tom repositioned himself to lean his head on her shoulder just facing forward and focusing on playing with her fingers, lacing them fingers with his. 

In all the time since she’d woken up, Y/n was yet to broach the subject of their babies name yet. She sensed it was a sensitive topic to say the least, so had thought it best to wait till they were properly alone - not in a ward of 6 strangers where the only privacy came in flimsy blue curtains. 

“So…. Aurora huh? Thought it was too airy-fairy, head-in-the-clouds for you?”  Smiling lightly, both of them were transported back to the pregnancy when they spent hours and hours bickering over names. Aurora had always been Y/n’s favourite but to Tom thought it was more a name for a hippy kid who went around clad in tie dye and bandanas. 

“Still is a bit...but I needed a bit of a miracle and Iceland was in my head. Plus I sort of accidentally word vomited while shouting at Haz, for being nice to me.” Iceland as in when Tom had proposed under the aurora borealis in the freezing sky - when Y/n had agreed, promised even, to be with him forever.

“But you like it?”

“Of course... mother always knows best after all.”

“I think it suits her too. One of your best choices to date, listening to me.” Y/n mused, earning herself a very delicate but still playful elbow in the side before the room drifted back to a much more comfortable silence. 

“We’re gonna get through this you know? Me, you and her, we’re together in this... I’m sorry I wasn’t in the beginning and I’m sorry I hurt you but now? I promise you got me and I’m not going anywhere…” Y/n needed to say it and needed Tom to properly listen. “ ...literally, I still cant walk properly.” Tom chuckled wetly at that, which made Y/n feel a lot better too. 

To be completely honest, Tom was still hurt and he knew it’d take some mending to move past everything. By no means did he blame Y/n in anyway but just the fact he was left alone and abandoned - well, it was the worst time in his life. The way Y/n understood that and had apologised to him - if completely unnecessarily- meant everything. Meant she would help him to heal... whilst he helped her too. 

“Can we just go to sleep? I need to wake up beside you in our bed not at tiny hospital one.” It was only 3 in the afternoon but because of Y/n’s medicine she was constantly drowsy and Tom? Tom was still in this permanent state of exhaustion. So it wasn’t so much of a weird request as it was on the face of it. With a nod, Y/n shuffled down on the bed a bit more resting her head against the top of Tom’s. It was exactly what they both needed, just a bit of peace with each other. 

That lasted all of 5 minutes before Aurora woke and started to scream. 

Life had most definitely changed. Especially for Tom. Because even though he was he was mentally and physically exhausted,  he only appreciated his daughters screams whole heartedly... because Y/n was there groaning with a tired smile too. They were in this together. 

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 I really hope the ending didnt disappoint too much, im aware its rushed as hell, but thank you for getting this far! And I hope maybe this series has done a teeny tiny bit to normalise not everything in pregnancy and child birth being perfect - that there is morbidity and mortality associated. Obviously this is all fictional (esp the amazingly quick recovery and lack of neurological/other impairments) and not medically accurate in the slightest !!

my inbox is always open :) t x

Tagging : @whitewolf51 

[sevarix-blogs]

so i've been thinking about this ask about whether yurileth would adopt (in my hc of them at least). I answered the question then, but I also wrote a fic about it :)

Rating: G Ships: Yurileth Words: 1k notes: a few fan kids are mentioned! background dimimari and ashedue ;)

Summary: After seeing how much Yuri enjoys looking after their friends' children, Byleth starts to wonder if his husband regrets their decision to never raise kids of their own.

The Question of Parenthood

Byleth stood on the star terrace, glancing down at the bustling crowds below. It happened whenever the king was visiting, and this time was no different.

Dimitri, of course, hated that sort of thing. Even nearly ten years after being crowned, he wasn’t one for special treatment due to his status. His wife, Marianne, was much the same. But regardless of how they felt, they were simply beloved by their people, and always could count on some kind of reaction to their arrival at the monastery.

Byleth turned back toward his room to make more preparations. It was a small reunion with a schedule of diplomatic meetings, though seeing any of his old friends  was always a joy.

Ashe and Dedue had been the first to arrive, and had come all the way from Duscur for the meeting along with their adopted daughter. Byleth guessed she could not be much older than seven, though her wisdom much exceeded her age. It was nice to see she had taken after her parents in that way.

And already he had met the young prince of Faerghus on one of his many trips to Fhirdiad. Though only eight, he had the politeness of both of his parents, and even helped take care of his baby sister at times.

Seeing his old friends and their families together made Byleth proud of how they had all grown over the years. It was almost odd to think of them as they were when they were his students all those many years ago.

As he reached the hallway, he began to hear voices nearby. As he glanced around the corner, he saw Yuri crouched before Ashe and Dedue’s daughter, locked in conversation. The blonde prince stood beside her, listening intently.

“And then we saw a bear! It was huge!” To emphasize her point, she spread her arms as wide as she could.

Yuri expertly feigned surprise. “A bear? Really?!”

“Yeah! And papa left food for it. Then we went back to our camp!”

“Wow, sounds like you’re an expert adventurer!”

Byleth smiled at the sight. He had been a bit worried about how the children would feel being surrounded by so many adults and boring meetings, but already Yuri was trying to keep them entertained. He had to admit his husband was very good with children, and sometimes Byleth wished he knew how he did it. Byleth would do whatever he could as archbishop to help the children of Fodlan, but when it came to conversing with them, he always had a hard time.

But seeing how happy Yuri was interacting with them made his heart ache from guilt. Years ago they had decided to not raise any children, but sometimes Byleth wondered if Yuri only agreed because he wanted Byleth to be happy.

“Well,” Yuri continued with a smile. “You’ll have to tell me more about your adventures while you’re here. It’s not often I get to talk to a real adventurer.”

The little girl beamed with pride, nodding with enthusiasm.

“I have a story too!” the little prince declared.

“Well, we’ve got to hear it!” Yuri replied.

Byleth neared them as he made his way toward the meeting room. He didn’t want to interrupt, but the children looked at him in awe as he passed.

Yuri chuckled as he stood. “Heading in?”

“Yeah. You sure you’re all right watching them? It might take a while.”

“I don’t mind.” He smiled. “It’ll be fun.”

Byleth smiled back at him. “Thanks, Yuri.”

With that, he continued on his way, prepared to discuss all the Duscur policies, and hoping Yuri would not get stuck babysitting for too long.

--------

It was late when Byleth finally reached his bed. The meetings lasted much longer than he anticipated, and although overall it was not unpleasant, it was most certainly tiring. He was glad he got to see his old friends, and he looked forward to the part of their stay that would not involve such long meetings.

Already in his nightclothes, he let himself collapse onto the bed, welcoming its comfort.

Yuri got into bed beside him. “Quite a day.”

He looked up, finding Yuri smiling at him. “Yeah. Glad we can finally rest.”  He shifted, sitting up beside his husband. “How did it go watching the kids?”

“It was fine. They’re good kids. Easy to keep entertained.” He shrugged. “Flayn helped out too. But, I’m still exhausted.”

Byleth smiled. “They didn’t want you to leave.”

He chuckled. “Yeah, seems I’ve become quite popular with them.”

Byleth glanced down, feeling a bit of the guilt return. “Yuri… do you ever regret that we decided not to raise kids?”

“Not really.”

Byleth looked up at him, skeptical of his answer. “You’re so good with kids, and… you seemed so happy around them.”

Yuri pondered a moment, then shrugged. “I guess I’m just used to it. I’ve always helped with the children in Abyss so it’s kind of become second nature.” He tilted his head. “But there’s a difference between helping them and raising them. I still don’t like the idea of being a parent.”

“If you ever change your mind…”

Yuri laughed. “I won’t.”

It was only then that Byleth felt a wave of relief.

Yuri looked at him seriously. “I know we talked about this a lot when we first got married, but I still feel the same.” He smiled. “I really like that it’s just the two of us.”

Byleth smiled back at him.

“I like that we can focus just on each other and our dreams.” He wrapped his arms around Byleth. “There’s nothing more I could ask for.”

Byleth pulled him closer, kissing the side of his head. “I feel the same way.”

He had no doubts that his friends enjoyed being parents. He realized, just like many things, it came with its ups and downs, its joys and its frustrations. He also realized becoming parents possibly even made them feel closer to each other.

But Byleth also knew that his relationship was already complete. Over the past decade, their love for each other only grew. And now that his doubts had subsided, he looked forward to many, many more decades of just the two of them, in love, chasing their dreams.

[i-love-hobbies]

My happiness with Eda kinda not being rude towards Lilith (ft. Hunter)

I already praised this but I just realized, I should have more!

In this essay I acknowledged everything bad Lilith has done, so I'm not doing it here, but you DON'T need to read it to understand this post!

Here I forgot something really important.

Lilith was in a cult!

We all know about the people that tell cult members stories of how they have sacrificed people to satan and then laugh about it.

They're laughing about someone being genuinely scared for their life!

This is a threat to them!

Sometimes people that run cults use this to make sure their members are scared from the people outside the cult.

They also make them try to "save" others so it gets even worse.

I'm really happy that Eda's answer to "You look like some sort of a trash collector. Oh wait, you are!" wasn't "I was told by wild magic to sacrifice the person that says this to me at midnight! The last time this happened It felt so relaxing! See you then!"

This repeated a few times in my opinion would have stopped Lilith from saving Eda in episode 19, because if she doesn't join the coven she is beyond saving plus Lilith is risking to become just like her. And later on Lilith would have probably had even more mental health issues. I don't want to imagine Luz, King and Hooty.

Disclaimer:

I can't find a way to continue without saying how I think this should be handled. So I should say I'm not an expert.

I'm an atheist, the last supernatural thing I believed in was fortune telling, chakras and so on. But I realized how easily this can be used to scam people.

My parents buy this tea from this people, that say every doctor except for surgeons can be replaced.

Luckily my parents don't believe in everything.

I wouldn't say I have a lot of experience with this as I'm not sure if what I described is called a cult, honestly. But I've seen some stuff.

Like the fear in my mom's eyes, when I don't take tea, cause it "helps with my tics, adhd and mental health".

How did Eda handle it?

We don't know much about how Eda decided to not join a coven or how much she has heard of other people stories.

But we do know at one point she stopped believing in Belos.

Season 1

She never really talked about Belos with Lilith.

I think this was a good choice, cause all she would get is Lilith telling her how clearly in the wrong she is. Plus Lilith is tired, she can barely process new information and everything in her life is about the coven.

I've heard some people suggest that Eda should have broken into the coven and gotten Lilith out of there. This is a horrible idea. It would only scare Lilith and she would try to run away.

She shouldn't be kept captive. This will traumatize her even further. At this point she'll try to kill herself so she doesn't become like her sister.

So what did Eda do? She put on a show for Lilith to enjoy, full of nostalgia.

She gave Lilith what she needs, a break.

She was showing her that things haven't changed.

When Lilith opened up a bit in episode 11, she showed that it isn't dangerous.

When Lilith came to her house, she played a game with her.

The only time she did something resembling her "I'm gonna steal your tongue." jokes was "If anyone is putting you down it's gonna be me."

Which considering what just happened was clearly not gonna be taken seriously and gave Lilith even more nostalgia.

If Belos didn't give Lilith a timer she was on her way out of the coven.

The problems I have with Eda here are her laughing at Lilith for thinking she'd join the coven as if anyone in there is an idiot, making Lilith defensive.

Also her lie in episode 17 which made the game way too important.

Don't get me started on what would have happened if she lost or when Lilith realises she was lieing.

Episode 18/19

Now in episode 18 Eda lost it. She tried to talk Lilith out of it IN THE MIDDLE OF A FIGHT.

She was trying to hurt Lilith the whole finale, both physically and emotionally.

I'm not calling Eda a bad person, this is how humans react, she went through hell, but this was a mistake.

She should have tried sneaking or something and if she got caught only force to the point of getting out. No name calling.

Season 2

It took her less than two weeks to stop guilt tripping her.

They worked on their competitiveness problem in the second episode.

They could trust each other with physical stuff like the other putting themselves in danger for them.

Lilith is in a safe space, wether she believes so is debatable, though.

I'm impressed by Eda except for the guild tripping but again she's "human".

She deserves praise for this impressive response to Lilith being in the coven. It's not perfect but knowing the average person, it's godlike.

Hunter

After episode 9 I think she might try to help, but so far she hasn't.

She threatened him and then got humiliated.

She made fun of him even after seeing Hunter obviously being hurt by it.

"Don't you recognise that annoying voice?"

"Why does everyone say that?"

"You must be fun at parties!"

No wonder Hunter doesn't respect her at all. He has only seen her the episode after the finale and one episode after Eda's requiem.

The last line was after he was trying to help her.

The only good thing is that, she isn't talking about Belos.

I died from second hand embarrassment watching both of these episodes.

[we-dragons]

I'm from a different dimension actually Chapter 7 Damian x reader

"Ira! I need my emergency kit!" Molly is pulling at my hair with a brush, I grimace at my reflection, she had put pearls and violet gems in my hair. Seeing as it already wasn't long bearly pushing past my ears, even though there aren't many of them in there it ways down in some places. I had already allowed her to put me in a ball gown, which I'm sure costs much more than my apartment building. It reminds me of peacock feathers, purples, greens, blues fill the cloth they blend seamlessly dark purple at the top and ending with blue at the bottom. I look at the matching marbled shoes and guilt climbs through me.

"Molly I don't need makeup, I'm already in a peacock dress, and there are gems in my hair. Besides the mascara is enough I don't want to spend an hour rubbing anything else off." Molly gasps, a hand gripping at her heart.

"Why-how could you say such a thing!" Ira hands Molly her phone, she screams. "We're going to be late! Ira put the bag back!" I'm yanked from my chair and raced down the hall within minutes I'm thrown into a limo with Molly's parents. Molly jumps in starting to yell at the driver shocking her parents who kept telling her to calm down. It doesn't take long to get to Wayne Manor, the courtyard is crowded filled with flashing lights from cameras reporters, and newscasts. They surrounded every inch with an exception of a semi-circle right at the front of the building where the car pulled up. Once more I'm pulled roughly out of the vehicle by molly, I nearly trip going up the stairs.

"Molly dear, we need to go in together!" My friend's mother pants from behind her husband seems to be in a similar position as me. Like mother like daughter.

I pull my arm away from Molly gently and smooth out my peacock dress, I sigh internally finding relief that I had personally told Molly to make the dress so it covered without it being tight. If I didn't then I would be pulling up the fabric like Molly who went not so modest. Not only had she blinged out she full-on black and high heels that pushed out her height. She looked good, and she made her parents match. When her mother finally catches up she puts a hand on her daughter's shoulder.

What happens after the incident leaves me at a table sitting behind a card with my name on it. Molly was seated somewhere else because I had used my own invitation instead of being a plus one. My eyes cast over the room soaking in again the decor of the newly decorated main floor. My energy seems to drain while I watch the people chat dance and laugh. No one was seated at my table and I was slightly relieved but I still felt odd. I had gone to parties with my mom in the past, ones that were held in her honor about her findings. I feel myself relishing in those memories I had looking back at the times she would pull a silly face at me while I was bored at said parties, or told a joke in some of her speeches. My mother was the expert in The Islamic Golden Era, despite not being a Muslim herself. She prided herself on giving credit to those who deserved more but had their work stolen by Europeans. But then, when she went on that Egypt and Greece dig she had found something that unnerved her. I knew what it was, and I wish I hadn't either. My happy thoughts turn sour, and I can feel myself grimace. I am tired...so tired.

"You made it, It's good to see you here." my head whips around falling on emerald eyes.

"Yeah, I had already told Molly that she could take me to the next party she goes to. However, I didn't know that if you came with an invite and not a plus one that you had to sit at a separate table." He snorts and sits down to my right.

"You were originally sat by her but father assumed I needed a friend," He shows me a card with his name on it. "so he changed Grayson out for you."

"Do you not have friends?"

"None close by."

"When have I accepted you as a friend?" He smiles

"That is a good question, but the same goes for me, you more someone I tolerate."

"Same here, Besides your a bad influence."

"tsk,...touche." his gaze looks me up and down and I have the sudden urge to say 'eyes up here'.

"You look tired, would you like to go to the library?"

"Usually libraries and tired people don't mix."

"How about a tour then, we have several artifacts my father has purchased that you might find interesting." He pushes harder.

"You want an excuse to leave, don't you? I thought my main purpose for being here was to talk to Mr.Wayne, not venture into the mansion." He sighs with his own body, visibly exaggerating the movements.

"My father is deeply preoccupied already in another engagement, he won't even be here for hours. Would you prefer to stay here doing nothing or would you like to leave?" He sounds rather annoyed while looking off to his left and scowling more. I follow my eyes to a group of three who I recognize from the cafe, all of them are pointing and smirking. I being to feel more drained at the thought of them coming here and stand. "Your home, where to first?" He shoots up, grabbing my hand dragging me through the dense crowd of people.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

"Amazing, this would date back to the early years of feudal Japan, this is Greek! Oh! There's a Khopesh and a Canaan Sickel sword on this wall!"

Damian scoffs sounding more like a laugh than a mocking tone. "You can tell the difference." I give him a look, feeling offended.

"Of course I can, you mostly can tell by the markings on the blade." I turn my head back to the wall slowly pointing to the distinguishable pieces of evidence. "This one is older Hebrew, and here you can see small hieroglyphics depicting the sun. Plus the metals on each blade are very different." I tilt my head back to him, his face stays indifferent. "You knew that already didn't you?" He nods and walks again.

"You must really like history, seems like you could talk about it none stop." He calls back.

"Did you forget who my mother was?"

"I thought she specialized in the Islamic golden era."

"It didn't mean she didn't know the history of other peoples. My mother developed research of anything she could get her hands on." I pause for a minute. "What about you, where did you learn."

"I was taught by some of the best in the world, my mother made sure of it."

"I see." We talk more while examining the objects displayed, I had fun just listening to him explain how his father got some of them. Though the collection wasn't huge it still made me a bit happy to see the objects. My phone buzzes, and I quickly take it out of my pocket.

Molly: Hey where are you we need to get going!

Molly: Dad got too drunk and now he's crying about the world.

Molly: We will be outside, Be there.

"Sorry, I have to get going, I'll see you at school later!" I run through the hall and snag as many macarons as I can on the way out. Molly waves from the car opening the door so I slide in faster.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

"Sorcerer found. Name: Doctor Fate, Subject: host"

"Anyone else?"

"Database shows,... John Constantine, and Zatanna. All other information is unavailable."

"Gather what they have on the crows send probes if you must."

"Proceeding."

Nightmare stands by the window waiting for his queue. I pull a scale out from the box and open the window. I hand him the scale and he chews effectively destroying the small miracle. "Remember stay out of sight if someone spots you wipe it from their memory and if you see a crow take the fight to the in-between and go for the kill. You have a little bit of my power with you only use it when needed." He purrs, rubbing his head on my hand, then jumps. He vanishes. I sigh putting the device in the box marked with an X just in case and push it under my bed. I head out into my living room putting some things away and cleaning here and there. Proud of my work I turn on the TV and sprawl on my sofa with a bowl of popcorn. Reruns of Highlander play on one of my favorite channels, I smile at my luck and sing to the theme song.

*Thunk thunk thunk*

I jump at the sound, I hear the noise again and follow it to my kitchen bat in hand. I flip on the light and smack my face, a very wet robin scowls at me through the glass. Only then did I notice the rain, and I pray that Nightmare is staying safe. I open the door and let him in, he mutters a thank you while walking in dipping water on my floor.

"Not to be rude, but is there something you need?" He ignores me and continues dragging water on the floor to the living room.

"Robin?" I catch up to him, he pulls something out from his ear and stuffs it in his pocket.

"I would like to stay here for a little while"

"How long is a little while, will I need to pull out the bed in the couch?" He gives me a look.

"There's a bed in your couch?"

"Sometimes I want to watch TV while I do my homework, laying down here makes it easier." I go to the bathroom to pull out some towels.

"Where was this when I was heavily injured?"

"I'm sorry, but the fact that you were bleeding was more concerning. I also put new sheets on the bed and you broke a perfectly good window. There is still blood on my cushions, and you wanted me to place you on the bed?" grabbing the biggest fluffiest towel in the bunch walking back out to the living room.

"You still on about that?"

"It was expensive!" I hold out the towel, he takes it and places his yellow cape in my hand. I frown but head to the coat rack hanging the heavy fabric on the highest rung. I feel short noticing its length, I turn back to Robin who's sat down on the couch the large towel engulfing him completely minus his hair. The black strands stuck oddly to his face and drooped sadly, I almost laugh because he looks like a sad cat. Like Nightmare whenever I give him a bath, I think I have a picture of that somewhere. "Did you want something to drink or eat?"

"Why is it that every time I come here you offer something?"

"It's a hospitality thing I got living in Minnesota, it's just being nice. Besides, you work to protect people, don't you? It only makes sense that I offer you something, I doubt you get paid to do your job. I bet you have countless scars from just doing so, I can do my part and help you feel comfortable. Call it a form of respect."

"Tsk."

I stroll into the kitchen, "Well, I suppose I could give some soda, tea, or water after all you left plenty on the floor."

"What happened to respect?"

"Well, I have feelings to sir! Tossing my words aside like that, I shouldn't even feed you." I poke my head back out, I smile at his scowl while he in turn glares at me. "Now for once, I am out of tea but I have several cans of cherry coke and some popcorn and macarons from a party I went to earlier. How about that?"

"That's fine." I hum grabbing what I needed and plopped back down in my seat handing him the coke. I place the brightly colored macarons and some chips I found between us along with the popcorn. I let myself get absorbed into the Highlander again just as MacLeod beheads another immortal and gains his Quickening.

"What is this?" My Jaw drops while I look at him concerned.

"Just how uncultured are you." His face flushes and his face twists he opens his mouth but i stop him. "Say no more, I will be right back." I come out with my computer and pull up VUDU opening season one of the show. "Sit back buckaroo, now your in for the long haul. Now right now all you need to know is 'There can only be one." His face contorts in confusion, but gives in and moves closer.

"I'm not going to get in trouble with Batman am I." He smirks.

"Most likely."

"Dammit."