Yes adulting is fun. The freedom makes it all worth it. But no one talks about how lonely it gets. I love the newness and adventure of it all. But making new friends has become a lot harder than I had expected. I have some people, but I'm trying to learn to be alone again. Learn how to do my own thing and enjoy my own company instead of sulking... so that raises the question. Is this a me problem or the joys of going out into the world alone? Moving has been the best thing I could of done for myself. Yes I live in one of the most expensive cities in Canada, but the adventure and lifestyle of it all makes it worth it. I lucked out and found an affordable place a couple blocks from the beach, got a fabulous job with great people, and found some amazing people with the same passion for horses as me. They just have a life so hanging out with them is scarce. Once again, having to learn how to enjoy my own company again. I prefer staying busy and working rather than being alone and bored. Obviously I am not the only one who is struggling with this, I just hope this reaches someone who is dealing with the same thing.
Sometimes you just have one of those moments where the progress we've made as a culture get thrown into stark relief. You look at something and go "Holy shit, that would never have happened when I was a kid."
Today, I had one of those moments when I realized that the teenage boys I'm working with are just. genuinely, openly enthusiastic about going to Build-a-Bear for their outing.
These are sixteen and seventeen year old boys! They just had a whole conversation about what to name their "cute", mostly new squishmallows! They're genuinely excited that they're going to Build-a-Bear this weekend and asking other kids to pick up specific accessories for them!!
Holy shit, that never would've happened when I was 16. None of the boys would have dared to be visibly interested - and neither would most of the girls! There would have been a million gay jokes and "Haha, you're a girl" jokes and "What are you, a baby?" jokes. Teenagers weren't even supposed to care about anything back then!
Less than 15 years later, and I'm watching three 17 year old boys treat all that as not even worthy of comment.
So let's call that a reason for hope. Even when the kids aren't alright, in some ways apparently they are alright. Go Gen Z, honestly. It's so lovely to watch you guys just openly doing and saying stuff that, when I was a teen, would've been a social death sentence.
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designs for a Transformers horror AU thing I was working on but shelved for the time being to work on my other main tf au project.
Thought I just shared these freaks without context. rest of the art and writing for this project prob not gonna be posted until/if I start working on it again.
Bonus little dude, he a part of a diagram explaining some lore but it doesn't make a ton of sense without knowing other lore from this AU I haven't shared.