#no matter how much i act like im totally cool with all this! im not okay with it!!! im very mad

[landofgay]

I love you THC I love you CBD I love you CBN I love you CBG I love you CBC I love you all the other minor cannabinoids. I love you cannabis. :^)

[nestavadavat]

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[girlboypersonthingy]

Hiii new anon here! Is it possible to request the Hazbin Hotel boys with a wheelchair user reader? (It’s alright if not! I love your writing so much! Keep it up! 💖)

Hellooooooo new anon 💋 thanks for the request! And THANK YOUUU ILYSM AAAHH 💖🥹 you guys have really been hyping me up. AND IM AT 40 REQUESTS RN LIKE ??? HELLO HI WHAT IS HAPPENING 😵‍💫 I hope I did okay on this…enjoy~

Notes: gn!reader, sorry this is short :(

TW: lap sitting, other than that just fluff :)

Hazbin boys x wheelchair user!reader 🎀

Lucifer 🍎

Often tries to push you around everywhere. He just wants to help but if that bothers you, he’ll happily give you space to wheel yourself around.

Will still do other things to help you out too like open doors for you, adjust tables so you can sit at them comfortably, goes to get you something you might have forgotten just so you don’t have to push yourself all the way back to it.

Sorry but he’s gonna very randomly and very frequently sit in your lap. He likes it, it’s comfy and it’s always right there fully open for him. He’ll just fall into your lap, wrap his arms around your neck and nuzzle his face up to yours.

Very helpful with other things you may need help with like reaching things that are too high up or assisting you when you need to get out of your chair for any reason.

WILL ABSOLUTELY PICK YOU UP AND CARRY YOU SO TIGHTLY AS HE FLIES YOU TO WHEREVER YOU NEED TO GO

“Luci, babe…this is kinda extravagant, don’t you think? I just needed to go talk to Husk, I can get myself there just fine.”

“Yeah, but I get to touch you this way~”

What a flirt, omffggg ❤️‍🔥

Angel Dust 🕸️

So many dirty jokes and horrible pickup lines.

“Oooh, best seat in the house~” as he sits on your lap before covering your face in giggly kisses

“Yeah, I think they fucked up their legs fallin’ for me.”

“Fuck you, Angel!” And now he’s cracking up laughing while also apologizing.

He’s actually kinda a worry wart so he’s gonna check up on you a lot. He knows you’re strong and brave and you’re used to this by now but he can’t help but worry about you all the time.

He knows you can handle yourself but he worries about others picking on you and taking advantage of your disability

His fav pastime is sitting in your lap while you wheel yourself as fast as you can down the long hallways of the hotel

Sitting in your lap while you do wheelies gets him squealing with laughter

He also offers to push you pretty much every day and if you say yes, he happily takes over while you sit back and relax. If you say no, he totally understands and follows along beside you still.

Very much understands any boundaries you have about you and your mobility. Hes a consent king okay?

Although he never asks before he grabs the handles of your chair and yanks you all the way back until you’re nearly parallel with the sky, then he smirks down at you before leaning in for a hot and passionate kiss. Not too long later, he sits you back up to your regular position and continues on his way, leaving you a blushing mess with your heart beating so hard you think you might die again.

And he never gets over the shocked face you wear every time he does that. He loves that shit 🩷

Husk 🃏

Okay this guy is so nonchalant about it like “okay cool…and?”

He sees that you are used to this, that you handle this with such grace and skill. You impress him everyday and he adores youuu~

Will often offer to help you up on the barstools if your chair is too low to reach the bar.

Holds doors for you, always runs to push the elevator button for you, just likes to go out of his way to be a gentleman for you.

Even if you insist you don’t need his help, he’ll argue, “Baby, you’re my partner. I think my love language is acts of service or some shit like that. I dunno, I tried to read the book and got tired. But I love ya so you’re just gonna have to get used to me and how I show love. Trust me, I’d do this stuff no matter what.”

He’s honestly just such a polite and considerate guy when it comes to you. He doesn’t never mean to be overbearing or treat you different, he just wants you to be comfortable so he always tries to push you around.

“Husky, I can push myself.” You sigh as he takes hold of the handles on your chair and brings you along to the bar with him.

“I know you can.” And he’s just smirking from behind you as you roll your eyes.

And his pace will slow for a sec as he leans over to kiss the top of your head.

He just really loves when he’s pushing you and he sees your head tilt back and your shoulders relax- you just seem calm

Sir Pentious 🐍

Homeboy is absolutely gonna try to invent and build cool shit for you. Mostly just cool add-ons to your chair like something to make it smoother or faster or more sturdy or even add a cup holder? Idk

If you ask him not to push you around, you will not have to tell him twice 🫡 he respects you and your boundaries

Buuttttt he is often seen resting one hand on the handle of your chair as he slithers along beside you throughout the hotel

He just wants to be touching you in some way and touching your chair is enough for him.

Loves to come bounding up to you with exciting new projects he’s working on and will wrap his entire self around you as he shows you his work

“Pen? Can you push me back to my room? I’m just so tired…” you ask him after a long day of helping out around the hotel therefore a long day of pushing yourself around.

He’s actually so excited and full of love rn, like he’s beaming with joy as he nods and rushes to you.

“Yesssssss, my darling! Anything for you~”

And he’s so fucking careful with you- we all know Sir Pentious is a clutz and a goofball but he is so extra cautious when pushing you around.

Makes sure not to bump your feet or knees or any other part of you into anything.

Goes sooooooo slow over any bumps, humps or ledges.

Asks like 457 times if you’re okay and smiles everytime you say “Yes, babe. I’m good. Thanks.”

Vox 🖥️

Does not mean to offend but he tells you he would happily build something that could have you up and walking with ease.

If you’re down to try, he’s more than happy to experiment!

If you’re more than happy staying in your chair, he completely understands but still tries to give your chair some upgrades.

Adds a phone to your chair so you can always contact him

Also watches your every move everywhere you go through his cams bc he doesn’t want some dickhead to think they can take advantage of you

Loves when you come into his work room where all his screens are bc it’s a bit crammed in there so it can be hard to get your chair around. Therefore, Vox loves to pick you up and sit you in his lap while he works.

He’ll press soft kisses to your neck and let his claws travel up and down your arms as you melt into him

And when you finally ask to go back to your chair, it turns into a playful fight.

“Aww, (Y/N). I was just getting comfy. What if I just keep you here.” As he hugs you tight, speaking in a teasing tone.

“Vox, I swear to Satan! You better put me back in my chair right now or-“

“Noooo~ I don’t think so.”

And he just continues to enjoy your company even as you pout and huff.

Alastor 🩸

Always uses his shadow or his tentacles to lift you up and whisk you around.

Doesn’t ever really ask for permission or even warn you before he picks you up and carries you to and from your chair.

“Oh! Alastor. I can do it on my own. Really, I’m fine.”

“Nonsense, sweetheart. The pleasure is all mine. What kind of partner would I be if I didn’t assist my love with getting around?”

He doesn’t have much of a filter, nor does he understand boundaries or personal space

So he will just grab ahold of you and wheel you around to his hearts content regardless of your protests.

One time, he unexpectedly rolled you up to his radio tower, wearing a particular cheery smile.

“Come, dear! I’m just about to start my podcast. Care to join me~?” He holds his hand out to you from across the room, waiting for your okay

As you give him a nod, his shadow lifts you and carries you to him as he sits at his desk, you being lowered down onto his lap soon after.

“Lucky you! Up close and personal for tonight’s show. Aww, and look at those flushed cheeks! What a doll you are~”

Alastor loves to sit you in his lap and then make fun of how flustered you get. It doesn’t happen often, him getting all close and touchy with you so when it does happen, you always panic and start stuttering.

He really gets a kick out of you being in a less than ideal situation and not being able to get out of it without him letting you. He’s a sick fuck, what’d you expect? He does it out of love~ ❤️‍🔥

[webslingingslasher]

hi!! can I request frat tasm!peter being sad/disappointed about reader not calling him petey anymore but he's trying to play it cool lol

like reader would come up to him like "hey pete what's up" and he'd immediately notice but he doesn't wanna let it show that he cares so he'd be like "you're acting weird" or something and reading asking him what the hell that means and he goes "haven't called me anything other than petey in a while" tryna brush it off lol and reader instantly knows where he's going but decides to play dumb like "yeah well you told me you didn't like it when i called you that" and peter wants to DIE cause he doesn't wanna admit that he actually kind of likes it and it's just endless teasing and maybe a flustered peter lol

this got extremely long lol im sorry feel totally free to ignore this if you don't wanna write it!! I love your writing <3 have a great day!

*cleaning out my inbox- this is regular frat!peter, however you invision him.*

'hi, peter!'

not that he's counting, but it's been four days since you called him petey and at this point he swears you're upset about something, you just won't tell him what yet.

'hi, trouble.' his kiss must be lacking, your thumb rubs over his bottom lip and you show a small frown. 'what's wrong?'

'nothing,' it's spoken into your skin. you don't believe him, you try again, peter's better this time around. 'your kisses feel sad.' okay, maybe not.

'i'm not sad, you're the one being weird.' you tie around him for a hug, he gladly copies you. 'i'm not being weird, you're being weird.' peter hums, you feel his chest vibrate.

'sorry. i think you're mad at me and you won't tell me why.' you have to be, it's the only reason you've been holding back your favorite name.

'i'm not mad at you. why do you think i'm mad?' peter's tapping his fingertips down the middle of your back, he doesn't know how to say it without sounding like a baby.

'i don't know. you've just been a little less affectionate than normal.'

you try to think back, you don't think you have. you had lunch with him almost everyday and wrapped your arm around his at the table, and kissed his cheek almost every ten minutes. and you almost had to beg him to ditch the party to come cuddle with you on saturday. 

and you're currently in a hug with no time expiration. you don't know how you could be more affectionate.

'have i?' you're looking at him for answers because you have none.

'yeah.' you can't fix it if he won't tell you. you poke his side, then tether your arm back around him. 'you gotta tell me how.'

'you just...' peter's so glad you're in a hug and have your head turned, because you can't see the blush he's feeling. 'you haven't called me petey in awhile.'

you feel your heart burst open. he loves it just as much as you do.

'you told me you didn't like it.'

peter knows what he said. it's just not what he meant.

'it doesn't matter if i like or not, i got used to it.'

you take a few seconds to think about it, it doesn't mean you can't have fun. 'if i start calling you petey again you can't give me sad kisses.' peter washes his hands over your back, you melt in further.

'if you started calling me petey again i would have no reason to give you sad kisses.' boom. he said it and he really wasn't thinking, you push him away and look up with shining eyes.

'you really do like it!' a gasp, you reach for his face- you reach for his pink cheeks. peter grabs your hands, 'no. leave me alone.' you bat him off and try again, he lets you.

peter blushes harder when you coo. 'you're my handsome petey.' his eyes close, 'trouble.'

'yes, petey? i'm all ears for my petey.'

my petey. he really likes that. it shows on his face, he swears he's about to start sweating. 'you know what you are?' it's not rhetorical, you're waiting for him to ask.

peter peeks an eye open, he's never seen you so infatuated. 'what am i?' you place a kiss to each cheek, 'you're my petey pie.' a whine follows, 'no, i'm not. i'm not a pie.'

'you are. you're my petey pie and you're so, so sweet.'

it's been a nonstop blush. you're loving this. 'guess what flavor you are,' you tell him before he can ruin it. 'strawberry.'

peter claws your hands off. 'okay, it's done. we're over this, now.' you won't let him escape without another kiss. 'sure thing, petey.' 

[5eraphim]

swinging out the gate with pure filth but i recently stumbled upon a scout voice line that made me cream my pants (tumblr doesn't allow links as anon so i'm putting extra parentheses to make sure it doesn't appear as one (https://wiki.teamfortress.com/w/images/4/48/Scout_domination20.wav))

anyways it got me heavy thinking about dom scout because i really truly think this boy is a sadistic motherfucker. huge ego and need to be the best, especially growing up the youngest sibling? having someone stupidly fucked out for him blows his mind.

and i KNOW for a FACT he has a daddy kink, too, and wants a real title to hear the power he has in the moment (plus there's another scout voice line that says "come to daddy" so it's essentially confirmed because i said so).

he's still a little bit of a teenage horndog about it, rolling his eyes back and getting a little nervous when you actually do submit, because he was prepared for a fight.

i would almost say he prefers it, wanting the struggle and the power that comes with quelling the flame in you but never fully, trying to push buttons to get you to give him a shove or a nasty remark so he has an excuse to pounce on you like a predator.

"yeah? you like that? gettin' fucked on daddy's dick?" almost really talking to himself when he drills into you as fast as he physically can, positioned in missionary because he wants to see that pretty face (and tits).

he wants to see overstimulation paint your features, you know that. he also wants to see that feisty side of you just so he can tame it. you push his abdomen the best you can, hands really just shoving his shirt that he didn't bother to take off. it's not working, and all he can do is laugh at your pathetic attempt.

you yank the dog tags that dangle in front of your face, sort of wet because of the sweat he's pouring, not due of the physicality but rather that he's so worked up and thrilled that he's heating up. the chain wrings around the back of his neck a little, not necessarily doing the damage you hoped for. in fact, you can see a switch flip and his eyes darken. uh oh.

his hands slam around your neck, having previously been attached to your waist, and squeeze so hard your vision goes fuzzy at the edges and all the blood rushes from your head. "you wanna choke me? how's it feel ta be fuckin' choked, huh? stupid bitch." he's degrading, harsh because he knows he can be. your eyes well u with tears, threatening to spill, and he grins like a wolf. he loves it.

"oh, what, you gonna cry? you gonna cry now?" he spits at you. that's all it takes before the waterworks start, cooling your warm cheeks and letting him know he's won this round.

there's nothing that stops you from cumming on his cock, completely overwhelmed by feeling and so far gone that it doesn't even matter. scout's overjoyed that he's got a pretty girl so fucking stupid for him that she can't even control her body anymore. he gets so high off the feeling that he can't help but bark out every filthy thought and word he has, a reminder that he is conscious enough to talk and you're so braindead you can't form a word.

"aww" he wipes your tears with the pad of his thumb, "don' cry kid, i'm not even bein' that cruel!" he taps his thumb against your lips, scowling when you turn your head to avoid his digit. he grabs your chin to force your eyes on his. "open up and suck my fuckin' thumb or ill replace it with my cock and fuck your face."

im making my mark as 👽 emoji because i will 100% be back to write more

HELL O?? HELLO 👽!!! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH RIGHT NOW!!! MAKING OUT WITH THE SIDE OF YOUR NECK RIGHT NOW AS WE SPEAK

thank you so much for sending me this, a bit blown awayy right now, i must say. top-tier scout characterization, on GOD. He is MEAN. he is literally a one man bully squad- of course he's gonna overdo it act like a total maniac getting nasty with his obsession.

i love this because i love writing Scout as on the more dominant side, but in a almost playfully sadistic kind of way.

[hxlcyon]

❥ ❥ ❝ miss me already? ❞

ace trappola x gn!reader | wc: 6.8k~

summary: your boyfriend (of now approximately a minute and 47 seconds) makes a bet with you: “those idiots”—your best friends of first-years—won’t even notice a thing even if we weren’t dating.” and the funniest part? he’s probably right.

warnings: pure fluff! shenanigans! lots of cursing! friends (idiots) to lovers. one joke gendered term of milady but i think that meme is gender universal lol (coming from a masc nb)

a/n: this is for @dulcesiabits's “who is the prefect dating?!” collaboration on tumblr! thank you so so much for allowing me to write for ace, the little man, the stinky guy. also MAJOR shoutouts to lily and ct for wading through this mess, i appreciate you more than you know

“Thanks for covering me.” Your sigh is accompanied by a satisfying crunch beneath your shoes, a stray leaf the unfortunate target of your latest frustrations. “Even if you were late to class.” It wasn’t like being caught on your phone by Trein was the worst of your worries, but a death sentence of papers and reprimands was, in fact, preferably avoided if you could help it.

“You owe me one.” Ace replies airily, slowing his stride to bump your side with his bag. “What’re you going to do without me?” Like he wasn’t the asshole who made you check your phone because of his sudden impromptu reenactment of an earthquake via spam text.

08:30 [ ace ]: fuck im late

08:30 [ ace ]: HELP

08:31 [ ace ]: distract him

08:31 [ ace ]: catch something on fire idc

08:33 [ ace ]: i cant believe ur gonna make me take the L

“Have an easier life, that’s for sure.” He makes a vague noise between a squeaky trumpet and a chicken, looking as if you’ve insulted generations upon generations of the Trappola bloodline with a single throwaway comment. “What was I even supposed to do?” Several expressions cycle on his face—focused, thinking, trouble—before he makes a decision and steps closer to you to ‘accidentally’ swing his bag into you again... only to eat shit as you retaliate and shove it back.

“Told you, catch something on fire.” However, the movement is enough to make you lose your footing and free fall to the ground; about to meet miserable, sweet, concrete Death before Ace grabs your arm and catches your face with his chest. “Not that.” Whatever you say next comes out muffled, noise and mind distorted by the smell of cherries?

But, the peace doesn’t last long, especially with Ace, as he pulls back enough for you to catch his lips twitching with another one-liner. “Oooh, can’t take your hands off of me.” He instantly catches your next fist, “if you like me this much, just say so.”

“Oh, Ace.” Time to switch tactics. You latch onto the front of his shirt, tightening your fists with enough force to wrinkle both his blazer and vest. “You’re totally sooo cool and don’t pick your nose and I am sooooo deeply in love with you that I just,” he begins cackling as you shake him, “can’t-help-but-choke-you-out!”

“What happened to boundaries? No safe word?” It doesn’t matter that he’s practically being rag-dolled for all of NRC to see, no matter how much you try to shake and activate that one brain cell of his, giggles continue to keep spewing out, taunting and delighted.

“I hate you—just! Shut! Up!!” You’re gonna throttle him. No one’s gonna find his body, not if you can help it.

“Wow, love you too.”

“Sure don't act like it!”

“What? I do!” You let up and he doubles over, gasping as he breaks into another fit of giggles. “How can I not?” He rubs his hand over his face, winded as he looks up at you, red eyes shining.

“What? Say that again? One more time for the audience in the back.” It’s meant to be an innocent tease, but for some reason, it sparks a knee-jerk wide-eyed reaction from him as a simple word slips from the depths of his very soul.

“Shit.”

“What?” You repeat, squinting at him. “What you just said, right? Going on about how I’m so lova—”

He begins to bounce restlessly in place, words coming out harsh and forced. “I didn’t say that.”

“Are you seriously trying to gaslight me? In broad daylight?”

“No. That was just a normal thing, you’re making it weird. Geez.” His iconic smirk warbles and it almost seems as if the heart over his eye begins to grow runny.

“What does that even mean?”

“Definitely not what you’re thinking.”

“Ace.” His whole body is flushing. It’s enough that you can make it out from his ears to the sliver of skin at his wrist. “Look at me.” He refuses, half a second from booking it. “Do you—”

Then, suddenly filled with resolve, he faces you properly... only to cup your cheeks and squish them together between his palms. “Ooooh we’re never going to talk about this! Let’s move on~” The voiceover is the worst that you’ve ever heard, high and lilted with fear and cheap falsettos.

The sound of your palms practically patty-caking Ace’s face into a sandwich bounces against the statues of the Seven surrounding you (what a familiar place). He winces but doesn’t let go as you two proceed to stand in an awkward, competitive deadlock. “I’m not letting go until you tell me what’s up.” You manage through squished lips.

“You’re annoying.” He grits his teeth in irritation, staring straight at your forehead like he was weighing the outcome of embarrassment and pain if he head-banged you and ran.

“No, you.”

“You’re such a kid.” Ace wiggles under your grip, attempting to escape only to fail to your stubbornness. “It took you this long to notice my feelings? Sevens, how dense can you get?”

You roll your eyes. “If you want to actually go out, the offer is about to expire in approximately three seconds.”

“Wait.” His grip slackens.

“Three...” You begin counting. “You’re kidding me.” His lips twitch, throat bobbing as panic begins to settle in.

“You’re not going to really make me—” You finish off in a singular breath. “Twoone.” 

“Wait, that’s cheating—hold up!”

“Should’ve confessed your undying love for me.”

“You’re the worst. You’re literally the absolute worst.” His thumb traces hearts on your cheekbones, words coming out breathless as the tension finally drops from his body. “Is this what you do? Play with a poor man’s feelings? Heart breaker much?”

“Yeah yeah, let me go and hold my hand already.” He obliges, shaking his head disbelievingly as his fingers come down to intertwine with your own. His grip is tight, assured this time as his pulse drums loud and steady against your wrist. Without a word, he squeezes your hand, just once, unabashed affection making itself fully apparent with your permission.

Though, you only get four steps ahead before Ace interrupts, “You had a crush on me? That’s embarrassing.”

“Oh my God. I can’t believe I’m going to break up with you already.”

“Too late. You signed the contract, breaking it involves a fee of seven million madols by tomorrow.” 

“Did I? Did I really? You didn’t even ask me out yet.”

With his free hand, he crosses his thumb and pointer, winking at you as he brings your interlocked hands up and presses a kiss to them. “Milad—”

“No.” He snorts, dropping it to swing your hands.

You see his mouth move, and the possibility occurs to you that maybe, for once in this lifetime, he’s about to say something profound. What comes out instead is: “Wouldn’t it be funny if we pretended we weren’t? Dating, I mean. Just for a week.” The grip on your hand gets tighter as he quickly backtracks, bothered. ”We’re still going to date afterward—no it’s non-negotiable—but I bet the guys wouldn’t notice a thing out of place.”

“Why?” Wasn’t Ace the type to hold it over their heads? Or, at the least, take the opportunity to be obnoxious about it?

“They’re the types who won’t notice even if you write it on their foreheads.” Reward of the year for I-Love-My-Friends goes to Ace Trappola, without a doubt. “Wanna see if they have a chance of noticing if we don’t tell them outright.”

You think about it for a moment, “Bet you’re gonna be the first one to expose yourself.”

“Says you.” He takes the opportunity to lean into you, lanky arms taking up space at your sides. “I’ll even bet Deuce on it.”

Not very far off in the distance, Deuce sneezes into his arm (properly! just like his mom had told him). “Ah, am I getting sick...?”

14:30 [ ace ]: “miss me?”

"What? Need me to say I do?” There’s an airy sort of tease to your tone, feather-light as it drifts down the empty halls. ”Down bad much?"

It’s entirely by accident that Jack—of all people—manages to overhear you as he scrambles to adjust his hold on a stack of boxes dangling precariously off of his arms. Did he just hear that correctly? The Ramshackle Prefect having a private conversation with... family (well, that doesn't make any sense considering your circumstances)? A long-distance friend...? Possibly?

“That’s not a no.” A lover?

“Loser, why wouldn’t I miss you?" His ears flatten with embarrassment, mentally cursing himself for having such good hearing as he presses his shoulder flat into the wall—a feeble attempt to stabilize the boxes. It worked, only temporarily, to slightly balance the cardboard already determined to give him several concussions.

After all, it’s not as if he could help the size of his ears or what they just happen to catch. It wasn’t like he meant to eavesdrop, especially on what seemed like such a private conversation. If he wasn't pressed for time or currently violating OSHA regulations, he would’ve absolutely upped and turned around to leave you to your privacy. You know... to be a good friend. But life (whoever said it was lemons didn’t consider it could be entire box fulls) was working against him. Dorm meetings, teacher favors, and the weight of the world practically rested in the room beyond—with you being the unintentional final boss blocking his way.

Whoever is on the other end seems to mirror his embarrassment, although for entirely different reasons. "Wow. It's almost like you like like me." The voice cracks, tinged pink as it trails off into a pathetic warble of a comeback.

"I mean... yeah? Isn't that obvious?"

The poor person on the other end starts to choke, "That's fucking cheesy." To each their own, but that sentiment was sweeter than it was cringe... at least, it was in Jack’s opinion.

Suddenly, something tips from a box and lands squarely on his head—right between his ears. The jarring sensation sends a jolt through him, lightning quick, and makes all his brain cells freeze to one singular thought: Wait. Like? Like... like? Can’t be. You literally said otherwise yesterday at lunch.

It was unclear how it exactly got from point “quit that, give my food back” to point “you ever think you’ll find someone here?” He really didn’t have any intentions, it was an absent-minded question. Really. But to say he wasn’t actually curious of your thoughts would be a complete lie.

“Relationships? At our NRC? Less likely than you think.” A fork hung from your mouth, suspended in your sarcasm. He distinctly remembers you squinting at him, huffing as your arms come out to gesture to the rest of the students surrounding you.

The fireplaces have exploded. A torrent of magic, roof high and smoldering, blazes unmercifully across students unfortunate enough to be close. There’s screaming. An entire portion of a half-eaten (and now charred) pastry lands directly on your lap. Someone breaks a window.

...All because a stray fire fairy in the kitchen got slop thrown on it. 

Your brow goes even higher as if to further contest his comment.

Fair enough. Jack had thought, handing you a napkin and ending the conversation at exactly that.

Did you suddenly change your stance? Was romance blossoming right under his nose?

And... doesn't that voice sound kind of familiar?

“Like you don’t like it.” He hears you laugh sweetly, “You gonna break my poor heart and pretend otherwise?” He can hear something akin to muffled cursing on the other end of the phone, rising in pitch, denial, and excuses. ”Eh? Did he hang up...?” 

There’s absolutely no way for him to prepare for the sequence of knob to hand to sheer, unadulterated pain as the door slams wide open and straight into your eavesdropper. "Jack?!"

Despite all his mental prayers to the Seven and a desperate grip, the boxes are knocked straight onto him and the floor, scattering an assortment of odd trinkets all over the ground. "Tsk—!" A broken bottle filled with some type of odd oil quickly spreads across the floors, making you both slip around and tumble until your knees pathetically hit the floor "Ow!"

“Jack... what the hell is this?”

Given up, no longer thriving, and lying face-down in the middle of the hall, Jack huffs out, “potion materials for Crewel.” His words come out loopy and muffled with a bit of a haze to them as his arm reaches forward and attempts to grab an orb spinning its way down the hall. He misses by just a hair and grunts in frustration as he begins to push himself up.  “Were you...” He starts before abruptly stopping himself, that’s none of my business.

You snatch up a stray pen rolling away on the floor and toss it into a box. “What were you saying?”

“Nothing.” He dismisses you with a shake of his head, clearing away some of the earlier haze. ”I just need to get into that room.”

“...Oh!” You have to avoid grimacing or slipping as the oil seeps into your clothes, but gingerly the two of you slowly manage to become upright once again. “Here, let me help then.” He beams at you in appreciation as the both of you make quick work of the scattered materials. Recovering what you can of several broken bottles, everything gets put back into place and Jack is sent back on his merry way to his dorm—only a minute pressed for time.

When he arrives, out of breath and with shirt sleeves stained olive oil yellow, Jack groans, unable to hold back his immense disappointment. Was the whole catastrophe earlier for nothing? Were they really having a dorm meeting about someone making “snowmen” out of people’s shedding?

Pause. Wait. That is really weird.

Several Savanaclaw students squabble, pointing fingers at each other while Leona lazily watches on uninterested. Jack begins to astrally ascend out of sheer disbelief, scuffing his foot into the floor as someone attempts to sneak away—only to have multiple shoes thrown at their head. Loud conversation floats vaguely in and out of his head, but something much more pressing catches his attention. The Prefect dating someone... couldn’t be, I’m overthinking it.

📞 [ call ended ]

Somewhere, on the other end of a phone, a certain someone throws an arm over his face now burned crimson—his thumb still hovering right where the screen blinks your name. "Fuck, didn’t mean to hang up but...” He slumps down further over his desk, wanting to melt in shame. “At least it's over phone, but argh—! This is lame." He drags his hand down his face, internally debating if he should jump out the window or just call you back.

“Ace. Your phone. Now.” Trein’s voice echoed from the front of the detention classroom.

Shit.

Epel makes a face like he's swallowed an entire handful of sour cherries. "What's got you looking at your phone so much?"

Your fingers stop over the keyboard, "Uh." With a very deep gravity, as if the answer was something he couldn't afford to hear, you reply in the gravest tone possible, "Your mom."

You practically have to throw your body out of the way to avoid the round-house kick Epel aims at your head.

You're out shopping together, juggling the assortments that you've gotten from Sage Island’s most popular tourist spots. With your hands full and mouth muffled by a snack, you order, "Camf fu sorch up wheof the fefenal," yeah, he has no clue what you're saying, "onmf phon?"

Phone. Got it. He digs your phone from your pocket and, with much difficulty, swipes it open after nearly butchering your passcode to lock point. "For Seven's sake, put yer snack down already and properly speak!" He grumbles, grabbing your thumb and pressing it to your phone to open the damn thing up and search the location for... fefenal?

Though, as he types it up, your past searches float and bubble up.

> why does my cat keep drooling on me

> if i boil an egg in gatorade does it taste like gatorade

> date spots

Cause yer cat loves ya dumbass... why in the Sevens would you even think about that... wait. Wait. Date spots? He looks at you, then at himself in a shop mirror, then back at you. No... you wouldn't force someone to spend hours debating fruit freshness for a date... right? Though, to be very fair, he was good at telling which fruit was ripe and the tastiest. But you'd do better than that for a date, right?

"What were you looking for again?"

Finally, you answer him with a clear mouth. "General store." He gives you a weird look when you return a "what?"

"...Wouldja go on a date for fruit?"

"...Huh?"

"Nevermind." 

"I mean—" Suddenly, a notification flashes across your screen. "tomorrow at noon, right?"

"Huh?" You repeat.

Epel simply shakes his head, "Clown emoji... second place emoji? Just texted you that and n’ a bunch of flame emojis." You look at him confused. "...One of the hearts is on fire?"

"Oh... Oh! Can you send back an image from my gallery?" He obliges and looks through the first five images.

"What the fuck is this."

"Don't worry."

"Whose mouth is this? Why do you have 15 photos of the inside of someone's mouth?!"

"Floyd."

"Ah."  Makes sense. He sends the grossest one. A ping later and he instantly sees... a chin photo of Vil? Epel snorts, barreling down as he chuckles louder. "Pfta! Haha! Like this? Serves 'em right to look ugly for a change!"

"Hold up, lemme see." You lean over and start to snort too, "What do you mean? He looks really good right there."

"Don't kid! He’d kill ya if he saw this!"

"Never!" As the two of you absolutely rag on Vil (lovingly... probably) and proceed with your day, the thought that had begun worming its way into Epel's mind lingers even as the both of you miserably pile crates of apples into a carriage: could’ve sworn the number under that stupid nickname seemed familiar... and what’s with that search history?

It’s horrible that such a nice sort of day was spent preparing for the next interim level of Hell that Trein deemed fit to sentence everyone to during a lovely week that truly didn’t deserve such misery. After all, there was really only one way to make any possible preparations for the upcoming onslaught...

Studying. Oh, the… horror.

It was the three of you in preparation for Magical Analysis. Sure, Sebek and Ace seemed to have a knack for it, but it was a different matter altogether to apply it in practical form with a group.

Squabbling amongst yourselves, Ace, out of air from arguing, falls back onto you with a grumble. “Sheesh, it’d be so much easier if you just did it this way y’know.”

“And stoop to rewriting the work of an upperclassman’s past project? Of course, humans wouldn’t have any understanding of what dignity might mean.” His prattling continues as he sweeps his pencil over a scrap piece of paper in frustration. “Nevertheless, integrity.” Wow, he was really taking it out on that miserable little pencil—the eraser gone to the metal line.

Ace rolls his eyes and looks at you. Knowing him better than anyone, you can tell he wants to ditch or at least shovel more work unto Sebek in unwarranted revenge. Without even bothering to hide it, he mouths to you, “C’mon, if he wants to be so righteous, he can do this damn project himself.” You kick him under the table, but he easily defends himself with the flat of his shoe. “Loser.” He taunts, low enough for you to barely catch it.

Oh? So, it’s like that today.

By the time Sebek actually notices is when you finally go silent. He turns his head up in confusion to see your face fluster and Ace looking at you with smug victory that Sebek mistakes for rivalry. "Hmph! Children! Are you so dependent on one another that you can't separate?" Sebek grunts, peering under the table to where Ace's hand rests squarely on your calf, dipping under the fabric to firmly stop your attacks against his stomach as your legs—practically in his lap—kick at him to let you go.

Your voices reach him in almost perfect sync,

"Something like that."

"I’m twice the man he could ever be...!"

Sebek only scoffs and tears another sheet of blank paper out. “That simply proves my point. Two idiots make a pair.”

Ace snorts, pressing deeper into your leg to tip you slightly onto the ground. On instinct, you reach out, grabbing onto his neck in what would seem like a romantic interaction if it didn’t jerk his head and cause him to nose dive down straight onto the table. “Fuck!”

“Sorry! Shit, you okay?” You fuss over him, patting his face and forehead despite his wincing.

“If you really felt bad, you wouldn’t be smirking.”

“Oops, was I?”

He sulks and leans closer to you, reveling in the pampered treatment for a minute more... until he pulls out your chair and unceremoniously nearly drops you to the floor before childishly catching you last minute. “Ace!”

Sebek, exasperated, watches this all with a sigh, he wasn’t ever going to get anything done with you two, huh?

....But to his surprise, you guys do make timely work somehow and manage to finish everything with time to spare. Sebek doesn’t even give a second thought to your shenanigans nor how close the two of you were, opting to think: Seven, they’re idiots, completely unaware of Ace sneaking a kiss to your forehead in cheeky revenge.

Deuce pauses, sniffing the air. "What smells like cherries?" Unconsciously, he brings his shirt up to his nose, double-checking himself as he sniffs the collar of his shirt. “Do you smell it too?”

"We're in the middle of the Gym, there’s a lot more smells than that,” you reply absent-mindedly. A ball idly rolls by your foot, remnants of the game only a couple minutes prior before the two of you were forcefully assigned cleanup duty. ”Maybe you smell something from the cafeteria?"

"It's not that." His hands squeeze around a basketball, confidence assured in his words as he spins it around in his hands. "The cafeteria doesn't serve cherries on Wednesday. That’s a Friday thing."

"Huh, really? Is that why Ace always drags us to eat there then?"

"Yeah, you never noticed?" He turns back, genuinely curious as he watches your reaction. "That's why he always gets so excited."

"I mean, we always eat cherry stuff every other Unbirthday though? Which is like, literally, almost every other day of the week. Don't know why he'd get so amped at the cafe."

"Maybe it tastes better...?"

"Better than Trey's?"

"Hmm..."

As the two of you ponder, Deuce's eyes settle on your jacket. “Huh? Where’d you get a Heartslabyul varsity from?”

“Stole it,” you say simply, much to the baffled—near horrified—expression that dawns on Deuce’s face. “C’mon, you think I stole it from Riddle or something?” He looks so stressed that you’d even suggest something so terrifying that he almost stops breathing. “Deuce! No! Think.”

“...Diamond-senpai...? He’s nice enough?”

“I mean, I do have some clips he’s given me. But no.”

“Clover-senpai? Maybe?”

“Wouldn’t it be bigger?” He squeezes his eyes shut, using all of the power in his singular brain cell to come up with answers—but to no avail, even as you walk away to grab a broom. It takes him until another class change that, when you finally leave the locker room and you’re bending down to retie your shoes, Deuce rushes to you to boldly and confidently announce, “ACE!”

“Took you long enough,” you sigh, rolling up your sleeves as the sun beats down hard. “Speaking of, lemme text him that we’re done.” You pull out your phone to go into your recents, a long log of clown emojis filling it. Eh...? It seemed like you called a... clown a lot? Did you get something with the circus? Before he can ask, a clown emoji pops up on the screen. “Speak of the devil.”

“Wait. Am I a clown on your phone?”

“Maybe.”

“Hey!” He looks to you, pleading for confirmation. “I am? Really?”

“I would never...! Probably.” You maneuver the phone to your ear where inaudible sounds from the phone continue, vaguely the cadence of ranting. “Oh, hold up, he’s asking me to meet him. I’ll see you later, Deuce.”

"The clown...?" He watches you go in confusion, mind spinning as he thinks about clowns and, weirdly enough, a recent complaint Ace had about missing clothes. He remembers a wry, affectionate smile on his face as he shut his closet doors and sighed. It wasn’t like him to lose things and he seemed to know who took them. So... really, that guy relented enough to let you borrow something from him? He grimaced at the memory of Ace letting him walk around with his bright pink leopard print jacket, jabbing him without mercy.

Well, whatever. You guys were all best friends after all. It wasn’t a big deal anyway. Maybe you’d ask to borrow Deuce’s leopard print soon.

It is of the utmost importance that the highest council come together... for a sleepover to watch the latest horror movie that had appeared in home theaters. But, more than that, there was an immediate emergency of the highest level that needed to be addressed: drama. The tea needed to be prepped, served and spilled.

Or so Epel spits out (albeit in a much rougher manner), lifting his shoulders high in the air like he was ready to start his villain marketing monologue. "Is it just me or has the Prefect been weird lately? Not weird weird or nothin’, just that... ugh!" He shifts his eyes around, getting quieter with each frustrated syllable. Despite the fact that you were gone for a quick snack run, it still felt wrong to gossip in your house... place… dilapidated building. But he desperately needed to know he wasn’t going crazy.

"Really? They seem the same as ever to me.” Deuce chimes in, balancing a bowl of popcorn on his leg as he mindlessly picks off burnt pieces lining the top.

"They were searching some weird stuff—" Unconvinced, Epel spins toward Jack, gesturing to him and waiting like he knew the answer. "Ya think they're... fancying someone?"

“It’s their private business.” Jack settles firmly, replying with what he deemed as a solid, mature, and impartial response. “I’m sure that the Prefect isn’t interested anyway. Night Raven College is far too chaotic for romance.”

“Well, if that’s the case, then why’d the Prefect search up somethin' like date spots? Huh? What’d ya got to say about that?”

“If you’re on Sage Island, date spots are practically the equivalent to tourist spots. Maybe they’re looking for nice places. Don’t overthink it, Epel.”

Epel, more worked up than ever, smashes his hand into a bowl of gummies, stuffs them all in his mouth, and viciously proclaims in one go: “Then why’re they texting so much! Huh? Huh?!”

“...That’s just texting?”

“I think they made a clown friend,” Deuce unhelpfully adds. “I saw them calling a clown emoji a lot.”

“It was a clown emoji...” A lightbulb goes off in Epel’s head as he slams the table in front of him, shaking off bits of popcorn onto the floor that causes Sebek to promptly scowl. “Don’t do that to the popcorn!”

“Oh, shut yer trap. Big talk from someone who’s not helpin’ anyway.” Epel huffs, but leans down and scoops the pieces off of the floor, popping them into his mouth without a second thought. The jab works well enough though as Sebek straightens up, a twitch on his forehead.

“On the contrary,” he begins, voice loud and booming at a decibel that makes everyone wince, “they’re too focused on playing to be dating. When I worked with them and Ace, they were lolly-gagging around without a care! If they’re going to bother dating someone, it’d be Ace and we’d all know already.”

Everyone but Jack nods in agreement. Imagining the Prefect and Ace, of all people, dating? Nah. They’d seen you fill his shoes with spaghetti sauce once because he used up all your salt and left the container. It just... didn’t seem like you had that kind of relationship. "True, I really only see 'em with Ace all the time, maybe he’d know something?"

On the other side of the couch, Jack frowns, opens his mouth, and then promptly decides to close it as he quietly surveys the scene with a pensive, furrowed brow.

There’s a clue now, a distinct, visible connection: Clowns. Of course, it had to either be a potential relationship or your career plans. “But about that clown emoji... I think I remember the number.” It’s gotta be the former, Epel decides. If it was the latter, wouldn’t you have tried honking your nose or something? "I’m gonna call it." 

Jack puts his face into his hands, having a moral crisis as he mumbles, “...wouldn’t they think that you’re a spam number?”

“Doesn’t hurt to try,” Epel pops another kernel into his mouth as he chews it in thought. “Think it had a triple seven in it somewhere...” He slowly mashes a key string of numbers together, erases, retypes, cusses.

Peering over Epel’s shoulder, unable to hide his curiosity, Deuce points out, "Isn’t the first bit the Kingdom of Hearts area code? Are you sure you remember the right code?"

“How would the Prefect know someone from the Kingdom of Roses outside of NRC?” Sebek muses aloud, unable to help himself either.

"Shouldn't we respect the Prefect's privacy?" Jack attempts once more, seeming as if he was shrinking with every busy tone Epel got stopped at. Yet, he continues to be ignored as Epel only calls the number again... and again... and again. "Hey... it's not our business."

"I got it damn it!" Stronger than any military man, Epel, the lone soldier, continues to push forward in his self-made journey. "Just give me a bit!" He keeps typing away, accidentally calling up a pizza place that makes everyone collectively groan. "C’mon, I’ve just about got it."

"Even if the Prefect were hypothetically in a relationship. Okay. Courting takes much time and requires a substantial amount of effort and persistence. I have not seen hair nor signs of lovestruck gooey eyes. Trust me, my parents are disgustingly in love. I would know." The scowl on Sebek’s face deepens, "we would've caught the Prefect by now!"

Deuce startles up, wide-eyed and mouth gaping as he blankly stares at everyone in pure shock, “WAIT... what? The Prefect is dating someone?"

"It took you this long?"

"WHO?!" Sevens help him, Jack was going to come home with premature wrinkles at the age of 16.

After about ten minutes of furious tapping, Epel’s thumb slips over the worn keypad and lands on one. His eyes, hazed over in delirium, border madness as he maniacally shakes his phone in victory. "Got it! This is it! Didja see that one?!"

"You sure? Pretty sure your thumb just..."

"I swear if you try sayin’ somethin’ silly, I’m gonna take my—"

"Then... why's Ace coming up on the screen?"

"Huh?" He erases, squeezes his eyes really hard, and types in the number that he sees in his head again.

 It's Ace.

“Nah, that doesn't make sense.” Epel sounds nearly hysterical at this point. He calls again and goes straight to a cheery-toned voicemail that mocks everything Epel had ever known. 

Unaware of the literal red swirling in Epel’s eyes, Deuce, having calmed down, happily nods with complete confidence, "Oh, it's probably auto-corrected to his number.”

“Phones do that?”

“...Maybe?”

Epel furiously spams the number anyway, not caring even if it was Ace. His frustrations were immeasurable, reaching an all-time new high. The levels were exceedingly dangerous, beyond over blotting with only one possible outlet it could vent to: Ace’s phone (and his dumb voicemail). In an effort to somehow abate Epel’s rage, Deuce gently puts his phone down and makes his own attempts at calling the number. "Maybe your phone is wrong, let me try from mine." Sebek, who looks very lost, does so too.

Through very pointed, timed coughs, Jack taps the table to get everyone's attention. “...ack. The Prefect should—uheum—return any minute now.” However, being the group of idiots that they are, it only brings about a different change, somehow switching to the topic of who it could possibly be. 

"Grim?" The little guy wasn’t around, somehow off meandering for the day or sleeping the evening away somewhere else in the dorm. "Maybe the Prefect's upped their pet pampering. Something like he’s being a grouch and they're having to give him more attention than usual."

“I wouldn’t be surprised if the Prefect succumbed to giving Grim a phone.” Would paw pads work on a phone screen though?

The answers quickly devolve, becoming more ludicrous as Epel casually brushes away Grim's possibility. "Think about it seriously won’t ya? If the Prefect is in love... No, Jack’s right—that wouldn’t make a lick of sense with...” He waves his hand vaguely around at the comfortable but still dilapidated state of Ramshackle. “What if the Prefect’s possessed? Having to step through life fulfilling the sad, unrequited love of a ghost..." It wasn’t as if the events of the whole ghost bride shenanigans were all that far away anymore—quite literally living in the walls of NRC. It was just yesterday that Idia, out of all people, was, for once, the most eligible bachelor of all the lands.

“Wasn’t that whole deal done and over with already?”

“Hm. Probably.” Epel concedes, still vaguely worried.

Sebek leaned forward on his knees, a perfect replica of The Thinker as he genuinely considered the possibilities. "I think... If we haven’t caught them, then it has to be someone who doesn’t go to the NRC. Perhaps it’s someone from RSA?”

“Like Neige?”

“Or, do you think it could—”

"Or maybe... you guys need to learn to quit it!" Ace, missing from the scene, all but tackles Epel as he shoves his phone directly into his face.

"It's important!" Despite his face mushed into a phone screen, Epel doesn’t hesitate to immediately throw fists as he scrabbles to knee the intruder. "We think the Prefect is datin’ someone and keeping it a secret!"

A look of complete incredulity passes over Ace's face. He momentarily stops squishing his phone into Epel’s forehead, twists his eyebrows, and then smoothly says with a shit-eating grin, "Yeah, you notice it too?

"SEE, I wasn’t goin’ crazy!" All is forgiven. Friendship? Restored. Epel, more than happy to present the evidence, drops his fists to recount the facts index to pinky. “They’ve been on the phone non-stop with someone.”

“Oh, yeah, that’s super suspicious. I bet they’re giggling and kicking their feet too.” Ace, grabbing a handful of Deuce’s popcorn with his other hand, pops it into his mouth and blinks doeishly while twirling his hair. “What else? Catch them making lovestruck eyes? Swooning? Are they writing love letters?”

“No. That’s the weird part.” Epel gets to his pinky, souring as he recollects your latest actions. “Searching up date spots...”

“Hm, really?” Ace, no remorse, continues to be a complete asshole, liar, and gaslighter. "Look, I think the cards are all on the table. The Prefect is head over heels no doubt. Sound agreement. Completely agree." He grounds his feet and pushes forward, back to his phone-spam vengeance mission, but Epel doesn’t budge. His resolve is only strengthened by sheer willpower and probably far too much adrenaline as he attempts to sock Ace directly in the throat.

Much to his chagrin, Ace dances out of the way snickering “sucker!” But the bated breaths of stars and divine karma decide, hey this guy’s a little too full of himself, and shake loose the grip on his phone.

“Oh shit.” It happens in slow motion, the cherry-colored phone spinning round and round until it slots perfectly in the middle of the table for all to see two perfectly immaculate coincidences appear. Ace’s phone opens—a beacon of undeniable guilt—to a sweet, innocent lock screen of him pressing a kiss to your cheek... in his varsity. Then, if that wasn’t enough, your conveniently timed texts appear, rendering Ace to repeat solemnly to himself, “Oh shit.”

18:16 [ y/n ]: hey can you open the door my hands are full

18:22 [ y/n ]: like. right now

18:22 [ y/n ]: you LEAVE prefect? you leave me in the cold? oh! oh! jail for boyfriend! jail for the worst boyfriend for One Thousand Years!

18:22 [ y/n ]: wait i didn’t mean it

18:28 [ y/n ]: babygirl please

Deuce can scarcely believe his eyes, barely registering the texts or the lock screen as he utters out a single, profound word torn out from the deepest depths of his soul. "WHAT."

Sebek, not registering the picture, reacts point-blank. "Did the Prefect call you babygirl?"

The most ardently passionate Epel stares and processes the new evidence quietly, “wait...” It clicks. “IT WAS YOU.”

"It was obvious guys..." From the very start, Sebek had even accidentally guessed it.

"YOU'RE DATING THE PREFECT?!" Et Tu, Ace? Just like this? Deuce had never felt such betrayal, never like this before. Such... deception!

"WHAT," Sebek’s voice steadily gets louder to match everyone else, baffled by the turn of events. “WHAT DOES BABYGIRL MEAN?”

Not knowing what to do with his hands or rage, Epel begins to put Ace into a headlock.

Jack leaves the room in second-hand embarrassment.

Ace, tongue in cheek and barely able to hold in his laughter, allows himself to be manhandled—but not without chaos. "Um? You didn't know? Wasn't it obvious?" He gives Sebek a smug smile in particular, "Didn't you catch my hands literally under their clothes?"

Sebek gawks, turning bright red as he flails, "ISN'T THAT NORMAL FOR YOU GUYS?"

The pieces all come together. It was the footsies in your study session, the recognizable jacket during gym, an eavesdropped conversation, a much-too-revealing search history.

It’s you finally coming in with the snacks—carefree as ever—opening the door with an "I'm back!" to only be blasted by a chorus of "YOU'RE DATING ACE?" 

You blink. The snacks drop. You’re out the door.

Jack reappears to pick up the snacks while Deuce knocks over the table and falls to the floor as Epel flies over his head to give chase—barraging you with questions of “Since when?!” and ”Why are you running?!”

"It's only been a week!" This little man is chasing you so fast oh my God how is he so fast. “Stop chasing me!”

Deuce finally breaks out of his stupor to go, "Now, wait just a minute...!" and slams his head up into Sebek’s stomach where he chokes on the popcorn. The two first-years groan, rolling around on the ground and couch as Ace makes eye contact with Jack, shrugs, and runs to catch up to the distant screaming (you) and threats that most certainly break the Geneva Convention (Epel).

Well, more like a light, easy jog as he arrives to Epel finding a spare branch and full-on frisbeeing it at your head, fully intent on taking you down without care of any possible casualties. It was war. If this was how you went, death via a guy whose parents really thought it was a good idea to name their son Apple™, then you mentally decided all of your meager earnings as a janitor and de facto therapist at this cursed college would go to Jamil. Sevens knows he deserves it.

“Epel!” So worked up on adrenaline, Epel’s head instantly whips around to face Ace... only to realize his mistake a second later as you kick his knees in and run, Ace close behind as he passes by and tussles his hair for good measure.

“This isn’t over yet!” Epel hollars, cussing you two out with every name under the sun. “Y'all ain’t seen nothing yet, I swear when I get to you—”

Ace’s lips curl with mocking delight as he throws his head back and laughs from the rush of your moonlit escapade. “Yada yada, he’ll calm down eventually... probably.” He was this excited to dupe his friends? "Pfft... haha! Sheesh, took 'em long enough!" Ridiculous. 

What a stupid, endearing idiot (your idiot). "Took you long enough. Where were you?" Ace’s hand is warm as it finds yours.

His timing is off by only a second before he replies, a little bit hopeful, “What? Miss me already?”

(Yes.)

You think, for a long moment, before reaching up and pressing a kiss underneath his jaw. “No.”

In response, Ace's hand squeezes your shoulder as he pulls you closer with a wide, genuine smile. “Liar.” Keeping you close as the two of you escape into the night, hand in hand.

♥♥

end a/n: hello! happy holidays!! i am also so late to the collab: i am so sorry—but i hope that this being longer makes up for it lmao. a lot has happened this year (not necessarily bad things!) but definitely. exhausting ones haha—so it made this piece really difficult to get out. BUT I DID IT. MA YA SEE THAT? I DID IT—so with all my heart, i sincerely hope that you enjoy this piece and maybe laughed a little. because ! that makes it all the more worth it! so, again, thank you for reading about this little foolish lil guy

[flemlem]

okay so. warning, this is Long (for me anyway) and kind of unfinished? unpolished? its 1am and i am having Thoughts.

Little analysis of qTubbo and Morning Crew because ive been seeing a lotta opinions and I wish to add My Own into the Melting Pot.(I may get off track, im sorry, im incoherent at all times, thats why my posts are so short.)(also all characters just in case)

So first of all, Im putting it out there. Fit and Pac still care about Tubbo. From an outside view, from the audience, we can clearly see that. Unfortunately for us, Tubbo is infact not acting with the same knowledge in mind.

As far as Tubbo is aware they are going to move on without him. They have eachother now they dont need him anymore

With him and Fits relationship We can see that the jokes are banter and just silly, even if ill timed, but how was fit supposed to know that. We see this moment kinda throw tubbo back into 'I have to be worth something, because why would anyone Actually want to team with me if i cant give them something, if I cant make up for being Me '. He starts being more reckless about wanting create back, not really caring to try get out of the cage, even though he probably could of glitch blocked up there at the start.

Ive also seen people mention the fact that Fit 'told him he was family'. Now please genuinely correct me if im wrong. Fit only told Sunny she was family("Youre family"). Sure, he was Right There, but we know that tubbo sees Sunny as more important than him, its totally plausible that Tubbo thought that that wouldn't include him. Its never specified that that was directed at more than just Sunny (out loud), Tubbo also didn't know what sunny wrote (as far as im aware).

I had a whole paragraph on Pac too but it got too messy to salvage, maybe another day.

Tubbo has always been slightly weird about his place in Morning Crew, especially since it started "becoming an isocoles triangle". Im not sure if im more on the side of hes trying to push them away before they get the chance to to save himself the heartache, or if he's trying to show them how much they need him like a 'look at how weird it is when im not there At All. Look at my Cool Town with Foolish and Not you. Please need me still'.

Im Most on the side of him distancing himself, not to save himself the pain(maybe still slightly), not to try get them to come Get Him Back, but to almost hint at them that they Can move away from him. Trying to show them that he does have Other People they dont Need to be around him if they dont want to. The thing about this that isnt working is that Fit and Pac Do still want to be around him.

TLDR: Fit and Pac still care, but no matter how obvious, q!tubbo is mentally ill and has convinced himself that since they got together he is becoming Less and Less important, only catastrophising further at each thing that could be taken as cold even when theyre not.

[sweetkpopmusings]

vernon best friend headcanons <3

a/n: i love vernon so much platonically (and non-platonically) and i needed some serotonin at 2 am so here we are :,-) also pics not mine ofc!

content: fluff | wc: 0.8k | warnings: none! | pairing: bestfriend!vernon x gn!reader | requests: open

definitely the ride-or-die type of best friend

it doesn’t matter if you met when you were younger or as adults — once he knew how much you two clicked, he became one of your most loyal and loving supporters

but i think he shows it in the silliest ways

like you tell him a bad joke, and, when you look at him for a reaction, he says “shutup, stupid” but with the softest smile on his face

he will NOT give in by laughing but you know he loves it

he is such a silly little guy himself

so y’all are frequently doing dumb shit together

not just the texting only in memes (which happens frequently since you both have developed a shared collection of reaction pics/gifs)

but you’ll both just be talking and suddenly you’re acting out this whole bit you came up with on the spot about a shirt that’s made of the shamwow

even if you don’t think of yourself as a funny person, you become a comedic genius in the presence of vernon

jokes aside, your friendship is a source of calm

he’s the type of friend you turn to for solace on your most stressful days 

even if he sometimes doesn’t know how to properly react (homeboy froze up the first time he saw you cry but he only got awkward because he felt so sad seeing you so sad :-( what a sweet angel) he ALWAYS makes you feel comforted 

and he’s always willing to learn more about what you need in terms of support because he always wants to be the best friend he can be ! 

it goes the same for you too — while it takes a lot for him to get vulnerable, when he builds that trust with you, you cherish it by gaining the tools needed to support him

and he’s so grateful for it like his heart swells with joy whenever he leans on you in hard times because he’s so lucky to have you as a rock 

speaking of rock

“black eye” is the proof i needed for my argument that vernon is in his angsty / emo / pop punk phase

so he’s totally the bestie who will jam out to pop punk with you (if you’re into it! i’m very into it and i would give everything i have to listen to neck deep with vernon like i'm being so serious rn)

in fact, he is the bestie who will jam out with you to your favorite music any time anywhere

he LOVES collaborative playlists that you two make together

and yes these sometimes become super niche and specific 

but whether you’re listening to your “top shower songs” playlist or your “standing in the back corner of a gas station deciding on which drink to buy so you can use their bathroom” playlist, this is one of vernon’s best ways to appreciate and celebrate your friendship

he thinks the best way to know each other is through sharing music and all the other things you like/enjoy, and that’s how you learned a lot about each other in the beginning of your friendship 

you of course meet the rest of seventeen and vernon has so much pride every time one of the members comments on how cool/funny/smart/etc you are

because he’s like YEAH that’s MY best friend right there!!!!!!!!

will be so down to take cool af photos of you 

even if he needs some coaching on what your best angles / preferred poses are he is taking down copious notes so he can nail it every time 

i can’t believe how long this is getting jfc i guess i really want vernon to be my buddy

he loves to just vibe with you

since you two are on the same wavelength most of the time, he thinks it’s the most fun to get food and chill at home watching movies, tv, or youtube together

like whatever you’re in the mood for you’ll do and it’ll be a great time because you’re together 

he also strikes me as the type of best friend who likes being friends with your other friends 

he doesn’t need to be super close with them, but he wants to make sure you are able to have him in a group setting too because he knows your other friends are important to you 

i think he also loves mimicking you

like if you say something he thinks is interesting/funny he will immediately repeat it 

whenever he tells stories that involve you, he impersonates you perfectly (this is also true when he is telling a story about you to you)

it’s just another way he shows how much he pays attention to you and loves you

overall he’s such a fun guy to be around and whenever you’re together it’s carefree and comfortable and secure 

he is ALWAYS by your side because he knows you’ll do the same for him

and he is ALWAYS ready to make fun of you for the same reason 

someone please give me a vernon tysm 

[moxielynx]

@whatudottu hihihihiiiii so ur ramblings about tetrax has me wanting to talk about tetrax cause i will take any opportunity to talk about him

d-23 tetrax is cool even if he didnt speak much in the episode, honestly d-23 ben deserved to be smacked around a little (/J /J that kid is like 13 😭), the twist that they were actually the good guys this whole time was great, especially since sixsix was also working with azmuth, which was a nice perspective

i like to imagine that d-23 tetrax is actually a total sweetheart and didnt actually like fighting ben since ben is just a dumb kid who doesnt know any better (even if he is a stubborn brat)

im pretty certain that petropia in the reboot is perfectly fine because for a while Vilgax wasnt. Vilgax, so he couldn't have hired Tetrax to steal whatever that crystal was from petropia then destroy it, so reboot tetrax is just what happens as a result of Tetrax not facing the consequences of his actions so now he's a MEANIE!!! but the dad instinct is still there judging from the way he interacts with Ben in "Mutiny for the Bounty"

as much as i prefer classic tetrax i really like that they went with a completely different approach with reboot tetrax, and like it makes sense too considering theres no way petropia would be destroyed in the reboot as well if vilgax couldnt do it (if petropia were to also get destroyed in the reboot then that would be so funny cause that basically means the planet is fucked no matter what 💀💀), its really cool to see that this might be what tetrax was like before working for vilgax and makes me really think about how different each version of tetrax is, and only makes me even more depressed that we never got prime tetrax in Omniverse, especially since there could've been so many moments where tetrax could've showed up

classic tetrax obviously isnt as cruel and uncaring as we see in the reboot or as he said when he was telling ben about his backstory because if he really didn't care as much but was like "okay this is fucked up i need to get my act together" then he wouldn't have looked so distraught watching his planet fall

i refuse to acknowledge the change in reaction in uaf tho cause it fucking SUCKED they cant just turn him into this stoic fucking guy after he literally shows up and shakes ben like a rattle, that and also they obviously didnt gaf about his backstory cause in the og backstory you can tell petropia's destruction was YEARS, probably decades ago cause he had those back spikes and even a different outfit but in the uaf version its just the same exact model THEY DONT CARE ABOUT TETRAX LIKE I DO!!!!!!

uaf tetrax made me so sad because i was already insane about the idea of dadtrax because of Secret of the Omnitrix, but when tetrax first showed up in uaf he picked up ben and for some reason my first thought was "omg is he going in for a hug" only to have that ripped away from me when he just straight up starts shaking ben around like a ragdoll 😭like imagine you dont see a guy for like 6 years, last time you saw him he helped you save the world/galaxy, and the first thing he does is fucking shatter you for no reason (or at least appears to be no reason), and all you get from it is a "sorry but i had no time to explain", like thats crazy, the REAL tetrax would never harm ben that is his SON !!!!!!!! and then after the single episode we had of tetrax and even petropia we just. never see him or the planet ever again. like we could've had so much world building for petropia and they decided to just throw it out like it was nothing

tetrax is genuinely such a cool character and its horrible how underutilized he is in every show, like yeah he was in 2 (technically 3 counting the reboot) movies but that doesnt really make up for how little we really saw him, especially since like i mentioned earlier prime tetrax wasnt even in OV which is probably the biggest missed opportunity in history, and the strangest part about it is that we got plenty of episodes exploring different planets and even a whole other system (galactic monsters special) so it was literally the perfect opportunity to write an episode about petropia and how its holding up

also never apologize 2 me about rambles, especially rambles about tetrax, i fucking LOVE reading people's silly little thoughts on things they like :3

[quibllyfish]

mammon request bc i need them too 😭 going on cute lil dates with him (he insists he pays for everything, even if u touch a piece of clothing at the store it’s urs) just some v cute shit :))

꒰﹒🌐﹕Obey Me Mammon x Gn!Reader dating hcs. . . !

﹕lots and lots of fluff and pampering (with a small amount of shenanigans)

૮꒰ྀི∩´ ᵕ `∩꒱ྀིა：❝—Hi again! I really hope this turned okay- Im not completely used to writing fics yet! I love love LOVE mammon though he’s my meow meow. Thank you so much for the detailed ask!! (I did not proofread at all btw so sorry) ꒱ . . ♡

-mammon, even though he’s the avatar of greed, is the most attentive boyfriend you could ever ask for. he absolutely adores you—cherishes you, and he’s not exactly sure how to guarantee that you’ll feel the same way about him. in fact, he’s not really even sure how to convey the depth of what he feels for you!! he’s never been good at the whole genuine relationship thing… 

-but he knows exactly what makes him feel loved!! mammon’s top love languages are without a doubt gift giving and acts of service; considering his nature, its reasonable that favors and presents are what he thrives off of. if those things make the great mammon feel special, then surely they’ll make you feel super duper great!!!

-one form of him showing this to you is dates—and not just normal dates. he’ll go to any length in order to make an occasion remarkable for you. 

-you like the outdoors? all of the sudden he’s bought a lavish cabin in the most whimsical, fairytale-esque forest in the devildom to whisk you off to. he’ll even beg satan to help him read up on the local flora and fauna so he can look ‘waayyyy cool and educated on plants and stuff’ for his favorite human!! be weary though, because if you two end up stumbling upon some kind of wolf or bear you wont be able to stop him from getting into a brawl with it ‘to protect you’. (inevitably you’ll end up back at the cabin having to patch up his wounds while he haughtily argues that he could’ve handled it if you hadn't gotten in between the two of them)

-you mention you got a stain on your favorite shirt? mammon is on it! next thing you know you’re being piled into a sports car and driven to a massive mall. every article of clothing you stop to look at is yours (even if he quips in that you have to say ‘pretty please, mammon?’ for him to buy you something—it’s only a bluff). if you try on clothes for him he’ll get soo so flustered—asmo’s right, you are really cute… grahhh!!! why does asmodeus get to think about you like that? you wouldn’t do this for him, right? mammon completely forgets his train of thought when you pull him into a tight hug and thank him for the gifts. 

-the first time you two have a ‘casual’ date is surprisingly fulfilling for him. you had had a really bad week. your classes were overwhelming you, you were low on sleep, and to make matters worse, when you were trying to get water your glass slipped out of your hands and shattered. mammon had been nearby—his head whipped around to meet the sound of you yelping. just as he was about to go on about how humans are way too clumsy, not like demons, he noticed tears welling up in your eyes…

-why did he feel sick to his stomach all of the sudden? it was as if alarm bells started going off in his head, ears buzzing as his throat tensed. mammon rushed towards you, disregarding the glass as he scooped you into his arms; pressing kisses onto your head as he uttered on about how you're okay and its just a stupid glass! he can buy a million way cooler glasses for you! he was about to offer to take you shopping for them before you wrapped your arms around him and asked him to stay in your room and keep you company for the night.

-of course, he obliged. he could totally, totally do that! even if his face was bright red at the thought of it. you both spent the night snuggling, tickle fighting, watching movies; most importantly, you two talked. a lot. about anything and everything under the sun. it was so easy to talk to you. this feeling was so unfamiliar—unlike other people, when you talked, you didn't make him feel like a let down. every word out of his mouth was met with a friendly response, banter, smiling. not once did you meet him with disdain or condescension. you looked at him like he was your entire world… 

-as the both of you fell asleep that night, mammon held you close to his chest. he could’ve sworn that, just for a second, he couldn’t want anything more than what he had right now.

[caterkinnie]

Hi, may I have some hcs of Deuce and Malleus having a crush on the same person (gn) that's completely oblivious to either of them liking them in a romantic way?

Technically a love triangle?

❥ ⌗ characters: Deuce Spade, Malleus Draconia.

❥ ⌗ tags: they both like you, but you're too oblivious to realize their feelings. sliiiightly angsty in some parts, mentions of insecurities, you decide what happens basically, malleus slander if you squint (affectionately)

❥ ⌗ a/n: love this idea this is an unusual pair of characters like with a prompt like this I would have imagined leona or smthing but this is so much more creative tbh also you can tell that im biased

Malleus wasn't surprised nor he felt intimidated after finding out about your friend's feelings.

After all, it only was a matter of time before one of your friends eventually fell for you, since they spend so much time around you. Actually, he was actually surprised about Deuce being the only one with feelings for you.

But Malleus does not think this is a problem, instead it's an opportunity to show how capable he is above all your other classmates. It's clear he doesn't think of Deuce as a rival.

It's so obvious he tries to one-up Deuce with his big gestures. Constantly giving you expensive gifts. Honestly I have no idea how you still haven't noticed how down bad he is for you.

Deuce on the other hand is oblivious to Malleus liking you, until Ace points it out.

He greatly respects Malleus, but this makes him feel awkward around Malleus, and the prince's attitude towards him doesn't make it any better… He's seen Malleus ominously staring at him more than once and it unnerves him a lot.

He won't make any advances on you, that's not his thing. Even if Ace tried to force him (until he found out about Malleus) he literally CAN'T be smooth and confident like Malleus. His endearingly awkward attitude is his forte, since he constantly makes you laugh (in a good way) and Deuce can't help but go simp mode every time he sees you smile.

Both of them are… incredibly obvious, and you've noticed how every time those two are in the same room everything feels tense. Not Deuce's fault though, he's mostly nervous trying to act tough—

One day Ace started joking about how he shouldn't give up and that maybe he had a chance, and y'know— Deuce took it seriously!

So he started taking this weird rivalry seriously...

While Malleus' easiest love language is gift-giving, Deuce's love language is acts-of-service, so he's constantly trying to be useful to you.

Now that the rivalry has settled up… What's next?

It's been quite a while since both of them started courting you but… the problem is that you're totally and completely oblivious to everything.

Everyone KNOWS except you, and that's extremely frustrating for them. They're constantly asking their friends for help, but their only advice is to just confess!

After like 3 months of trying they're just like 🤝 and it's like— you're not going to notice, the one who confesses first wins. The problem is…. confessing.

It takes a lot of preparation for one of them to confess.

While they like to act tough on the outside, both of these guys are terrified of rejection. Neither of them would like to have their friendship ruined by their unrequited love.

But if they do confess…

Malleus would write a love letter; he wishes to tell you how you make him feel, how special you are to him and how you changed the way he views the world. You took his loneliness away and everyday Malleus craves to see you, and he only wishes to make you happy, to make you feel the same joy you give him.

Deuce on the other hand would try to confess and get incredibly nervous— then start improvising, and it'd work!

You see, he trusts his friends greatly, even though they're awful at giving dating tips.

They constantly try to teach him how to be 'attractive' and 'cool' and he tries his best— but it just never works!

He had this cool and romantic cheesy confession planned. But he got nervous and forgot every single thing he was supposed to say. His only option was to improvise, it didn't matter how hard it was going to be, he just needed to tell you about how he truly felt.

Deuce always wanted to tell you how grateful he is to have met you. Whenever he feels insecure you're there for him, motivating him to continue even when he doesn't feel like he's good enough. Deuce admires you A LOT, and that admiration is now his strong love for you.

In conclusion: Malleus is an idiot who thinks he's incredibly attractive and cool and definitely the best option while also just relying on subtlety and refusing to be direct, and Deuce is a hot-cold going between being confident about having a chance with you and overly insecure after just existing near Malleus.

[arttrampbelle]

Dunno bout y'all but shang tsung would be soft for his s/o

Sorry not sorry but shang tsung to me IS somft for his beloved.

Because your probably the only person he's been with for like how long,you put up with him,and honestly would he find anyone like you ever again? Probably not.

So no. His s/o don't NEED to be like him to be with him. They just need to accept him and he's gonna be well....a dark sorcerer. Plain n simple.

Sure it would be nice to find like minds. But i dunno shang doesn't strike me personally to go after someone that is an exact copy of him or tries to be like him. He like genuineness above all else. Ironically.

If you can be yourself. And who you are honestly. And are absolutely undyingly loyal to him.

It doesn't matter how cunning or "intellectual" you are. It doesn't matter what your personality is.

He values loyalty,honesty,and genuine people. Because those people he can actually fucking keep around and not stab him in the back when plans go off the rails.

Which unfortunately he tends to hire or associate with.

So to have you,who is loyal,trusting,and bound to him. Soul or not.

Is a fucking treasure.

Look man i get it. You wanna be like shang. He one cool dude. I feel you. But there is only one room for a cunning binch. And thats him.

So if you're trying to match him,good luck. Because he'll see right through that and walk away.

But if its genuine. He'll stay. But dont be fake.

There is a difference between him with business partners or friends/allies and romantic partners or even a spouce.

Like for anything closer it needs to be something worth keeping yes. But again it doesn't NEED to be like him to catch his eye.

In all honesty.

Someone who he can be genuinely domestic with and take off the evil sorcery mask around would be a breath of fresh air to him. He could let down his walls for fucking once.

He is happy to be around you. And only you.

Could he be clingy,sure. Possessive? Sure. But you are well taken care of. Nobody's gonna fuck with you on his watch.

Also if you cant fight,he'll teach you. You wanna learn magic. Become the sorcerer's apprentice. No. Not the movie.

Just also make sure its not soul magic or anything heavier. Because he's very particular about that. But thats out of protection for himself AND you.

But any of invocations of magic is perfectly acceptable. Elemental is the easiest and most likely.

But yeah,he'd happy to teach you anything he knows. Tbh shang tsung would totally take in an apprentice he can mold to his desires. Especially to take down a certain thunder god. Hee hee.

Some of y'all have a decent idea on him. But miss the point he doesn't need someone to be like him.

In fact.....thats boring.

He would want someone he can cherish. I wouldn't put it past him to slowly unbeknown to you. To slowly increase your lifespan or slow your aging with magic. Sure you may not know it at first. But after maybe a decade or so....you question some shit and go "hey wait a minute"

I dunno man.

Shang i honestly don't think gives a fuck about superficial crap much. He acts like it. But thats not what keeps him.

He's over 500yrs old. Do you honestly believe anyone that long lives gives a fuck about superficial crap?

No. Not even the vainest mofo would give a damn after a while. It would get boring.

I know my villains honey. And i know these archtypes.

But all in all.....at the end of the day.....does it matter?

No. Because you,reader,you are the special exception.

Shang would totally love you no matter what the hell your personality is like. As long as your genuine about it.

Thats all he'd care about.

So dont listen to these x readers that have "oh he wouldn't like so n so" or "he wouldn't like x this type person" like hell. He would totally love you. Im sorry but i hate people who say in x reader type posts to say. They wouldn't like this type of person. No. Thats wrong. And bad x reader writing.

Like at the end of the day,its your writing. Write however you want. Its your city. But for me. Shang tsung don't give a single rats ass what you look like,what your personality is,if your soft n sweet or cunning like him. (Bonus if you both) but at the end of the day he's just happy that he's finally found someone to share life with. However brief if may or may not be. Fr.

You need to be open minded about this type of writing. Dont alienate reader like that.

I have learned its best to write less about what reader is or is like. And more about character in question. And less about "types" and more about what keeps them. And most of them. I hate to break it to you. Especially villains.

Wants some damn loyalty and peace n quiet. Do you how stressful it is to be evil bad guy all the time? Dont you think they deserve a damn break once n a while. Like come home from a long day of scheming "honey im home,i love you. Lets take a bath together" type shit.

Like bruh come on

Like shang tsung just wants to chill and be on his island n have souls to "drink" is that hard to ask for?

And he would absolutely cherish you. Like a dragon coiled around his treasure.

You are precious to him. And if he could,he'd clutch you tighter,hide you in his pocket from the cold dangerous world of kombat.

But alas. He cant.

Because thats not how it works. Even if the odds are in his favor.

A mastermind like him would also needs to be gentle with his beloved,to keep them in his favor or keep them beholden to him anyways. I feel it would be genuine,but also shang tsung is gonna well....shang tsung.

But even when he's being a bastard,he isn't gonna shy away from making sure you're absolutely comfortable and well loved.

You don't need to be just like him to be loved by him. You just need to be genuine.

Anyways. Shang tsung loves you. Ok? Dont you worry your precious heads my fellow shang tsimps,self shippers,and fic writing community.

[pesterloglog]

Dave Strider, Rose Lalonde

Act 6, page 5398

DAVE: whats up with the fish punk troll following kanaya around

ROSE: Seems she's passing through. Kanaya doesn't want her to cause trouble.

DAVE: cause trouble

DAVE: what the fuck could she even do here

DAVE: like kick over an old pile of garbage and cause the property value to fall even lower than jack shit

DAVE: i say let her go nuts

ROSE: Feel free to take it up with Kanaya.

ROSE: But if you authorize her to flip a bitch, just make sure she's nowhere near my chemistry table.

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: cant be droppin your vials and shit all over the floor

DAVE: the only one whos got clearance to drop science is me

ROSE: Dork.

DAVE: dont even hate

DAVE: been shoring up my muthafuckin CRAFT over here

ROSE: I know. I've been in the same room, right over there, listening to you mumble lyrics to yourself for the last couple hours.

DAVE: rose you know what sucks

ROSE: Yes.

ROSE: To which sucky thing are you referring?

DAVE: it kinda just occurred to me

DAVE: while i was spitting ill verse to no end

DAVE: i got this weird feeling that i might be getting like

DAVE: a little dated?

ROSE: Is this about Terezi?

DAVE: what

DAVE: no no

DAVE: dont be disingenuous word girl you know what im saying

DAVE: i mean sorta passe

DAVE: like a lumbering pop reference dinosaur

DAVE: remember we are both kind of stuck in 2009

DAVE: so im like popculturally frozen in that period

DAVE: all my references feel like they might be getting a little stale

DAVE: even though the earth ended and all and there was no culture after that point anyway

DAVE: but still

DAVE: i can feel it

DAVE: like in my bones

DAVE: i just know on some hypothetical earth that kept going my shit is starting to get so lame

DAVE: and i know it doesnt matter because its just us here so who cares

DAVE: but i care

DAVE: its a matter of integrity i am a fucking artist

DAVE: like i think if i make one more rap about like some fucking dane cook movie from 2008 to piss karkat off or some tired bullshit like that im going to

DAVE: i dont know

DAVE: ill just start feeling like a fraud

DAVE: my game might be drying up rose

DAVE: but its not my fault like im totally hostage to this freezedried backlog of cultural garbage that can never move forward again

DAVE: so i have to pick through it like im looting a fucking tomb while still all tryin to act RAP SASSY

DAVE: like YEAH take THAT motherfuckers

DAVE: OF THE PAST

DAVE: all in your mass graves somewhere in a dead frogiverse

DAVE: i be representing some god damn STANDARDS about your media do you feel me

DAVE: im depressing myself here

DAVE: all im saying is it would be cool to have some fresh shit to work with

DAVE: like just to know

DAVE: to know what the world would be like in the year it would be for us now

DAVE: which would be 2011 i guess

DAVE: wow 2011 really

DAVE: damn

DAVE: i just want to know what would have happened

DAVE: theres so much shit we were primed for

DAVE: it was gonna be exciting

DAVE: like barack obama just turned president remember that

DAVE: we never got to see if he fixed the economy

DAVE: remember how you were dying to see if he would fix the economy you were asking me about it every damn day

DAVE: just joking nobody gave a shit about that

DAVE: but like

DAVE: i never got to check out the next batch of stiller jams and see how bad i could mock them

DAVE: we never got to find out how the midnight crew adventure ended

DAVE: if ever

DAVE: rose

DAVE: ROSE??

DAVE: what the fuck man

DAVE: whyd you go back to your bottles and shit i was right in the thick of hella elocution

DAVE: dont give me that

DAVE: yes

DAVE: uh yeah

DAVE: yes i do ACTUALLY want you to come back over here

DAVE: im waiting

ROSE: Fine. Here I am.

DAVE: wow was that so hard

DAVE: this is what civilized people do rose they fucking talk to each other like actually in each others fucking vicinities

ROSE: You just have a tendency to go on for a while. I assumed we progressed to the traditional mumbling monologue stage of Striderian discourse.

DAVE: no thats not even a thing

DAVE: i was actually like

DAVE: trying to get your take

ROSE: Take on what.

DAVE: i dont even know

DAVE: i bet john would have stuff to say

DAVE: hes probably going through the same frozen fucking caveman from 2009 syndrome as me

DAVE: actually what am i saying the dude is a caveman from 1997

DAVE: hahaha like he could give a shit as long as hes got his cage dvds

ROSE: Oh! I saw him the other night.

DAVE: what

ROSE: In a dream. It was very brief, only a few minutes. I waved to him and then woke up.

DAVE: whoa what was he doing

ROSE: He was fighting Jack. Actually, he was doing quite well!

DAVE: oh man

DAVE: you have to tell me all about this

ROSE: I will. Later, though. I'd like to get back to work.

DAVE: ok when

DAVE: tonight?

ROSE: I have plans tonight. How about tomorrow.

DAVE: plans

DAVE: what plans

ROSE: Just some plans.

DAVE: can i come

ROSE: No!

DAVE: fuck fine

DAVE: tomorrow then

DAVE: maybe ill just dream up my own john tonight and well have an awesome time without you what do you think about that

ROSE: ...

DAVE: fu

[pariskim]

hi. resident mac fanatic.

tonight im thinkin about mac's love language seeming to be doing acts of service. he loves helping out, doing constant little favors for those he loves. we mostly see this manifest through dennis, but like. cmon. i think hes been doing shit like this for joyce since they were wee babies.

mac clinging desperately to the only friend he has, constantly offering to be the one to go collect the rocks they throw, to grab their school papers, to find whatever substances they wanna do together. by now, i like to think its second nature. whenever one of the pair would need to get up and grab something, mac would always do it. whenever the duo needed to be defended, mac was the one defending. it just becomes kinda a wordless thing after a while- its second nature to them.

of course, its not like joyce didnt contribute. she was conversation, a breath of fresh air in macs crushing neglect. she always had something for them both to do, to bond over. she always gave mac a reason to laugh and smile and a place to talk for ages and at least be somewhat listened to. she was always the one nodding along and affirming how cool mac was while she placed the bandaids over his scrapes, or helped hold the ice pack to his bruises.

being friends with joyce often meant mac got hurt. he couldnt watch people insult her (and, of course, him too) and just stand around, he always had to do something. joyce always had someone fighting so hard for her. in return, mac had someone to fight for, someone to be able to cling to. to ask "was that cool?" "did i do a good job?" "do you think they were scared?" and always get a proud "yeah, definitely".

all this reminiscing comes while they smoke skunk weed and mac is painting joyces nails. by this point theyre teary eyed, and theyve been holding hands for a while now, and they had just gotten done talking about how much theyve always cared about each other.

"not to sound gay or anything," mac breaks the silence first, always the one to make the first move in everything between them. "but- do you think we'd be best friends no matter what? like- no matter who we could have been born as, we always would have ended up finding each other?"

joyce lets a moment of silence linger in the air.

"i think youve been smoking too much weed, you sound like a total hippie."

"....yeah. yeah, i- hehe, i guess so. but-"

"yeah. i think we'd be friends no matter what, even if- we were born as cats, or whatever."

theres a quiet, shared moment of warm smiles exchanged between them, simply happy to have made the other happy, in a never ending cycle of content emotions for the two.

"thanks, joyce."

i hope its an enjoyable read i had to squeeze the last part out a little rushed i hope its not too bad >~<

IM GONNA CRY FOREVER. THISIS SO BEAUTIFUL

[salsakiyoomi]

GAHHH OH MY GOD OKAY OKAY first of all holy smokes I love the theme on your blog so much it's so cool and the red is just,,, chefs kiss oh man💗💗🥹!!

OKAY AJAJA would it be alright if I asked for a matchup for Spiderverse (either of the other fandoms work if they're easier/more fun to work with!! I love all of the fandoms there as well ajajja) :O??<3 please take as long as you need with it!!💗🙏

my persona:

name: ellie :D

personality: ENFP/ENTP (but E and I are bound to change depending on how I'm feeling while taking the test BWAHSHSHD so here's another description!!): I'm a generally optimistic person with the sense of humor of an eight year old boy. I will laugh at your mom jokes and then apologize and then make another one😭 I enjoy helping people and creating things, but I do tend to question my morals a lot and wonder why I am helping those people !! I really like the idea of self-improvement and knowing there's always room for more :D reminders are always great too because I forget a lot of things SJDBSJSJHS

zodiac sign: aries!

ideal type: i'm okay with being paired with any gender, no preference! i'm also a minor/highschool student if that helps at all :D (i'm totally on board with platonic matchups as well, i'm unlabeled so for me i can roll along w just about anything!! whatever is easiest GAARAHH). i really admire people who are kind at heart, it doesn't matter how they show it :D i admire people who are humble but not meek, and are willing to speak their minds when it feels right to them OH MAN and I also love people who i can go on and have deep talks with them and fall asleep next to them giggling like im 7 years old at a sleepover every night. OH AJDJSJ and I also love watching shows meant For Literal Children/cartoons because I find them genuinely hilarious and the lessons are always so good 😭🙏 creativity is important to me as well + education for passions :D my giving love language is words of affirmation and physical touch, and my main receiving is acts of service and physical touch! :D

my favorite trope: SHDHDJDJ FOUND FAMILY FOUND FAMILY FOUND FAMILY or any forms of domestic fluff!! 💗💗(sharing a bed and hurt/comfort and being held after a nightmare is my JAM BWAHHS)

favorite season: autumn :)))

hobbies: I absolutely love biology/biomed/environmental science :D! I love going to aquariums and (art) museums and learning about my passions. i definitely want to work at an aquarium as one of those people who give tours to the 3rd graders one day 🥰🙏 I also love listening to instrumental scores from movies!! (I CRIED OVER THE ONES FROM ATSV I AM UNWELL) how to train your dragon and big hero 6 are definitely up there as a few of my favorites :D oh man I also love performing and doing musical theatre for the sake of the community WAHHHSJ,, I love art and writing even though I can get pretty bad writer's block AND OH MAN I love tutoring a lot and going on bike rides when I'm alone !! I love hanging out w people but I also value my alone time as well, and soMETIMES (I AM WORKING ON IT SJXJSJ) I tend to become a doormat where i can't say no and worry about how I am in public places (bUT I HAVE NO PROBLEM DOING PRESENTATIONS WHICH I FIND HILARIOUS SJXNSKJD), but again I SWEAR I am working on it !! =D💗

and the fandom for spider verse would be great :D!! but again anything else is totally okay!!!

OKAHXHSJD IM SO SORRY I WROTE SO MUCH PLEASE DO NOT STRESS YOURSELF OUt ABOUT IT I ALSO THINK YOUR WRITING IS VERY NEAT AND I LIKE IT VERY MUCH AND I AM DEFINITELY GOING TO READ MORE BECAUSE THE STARS W AKAASHI MADE ME MELT. okay that is all have a wonderful day!!! 😭🙏🙏🙏💗💗 take good care of yourself and make sure to sleep well :D!

HONEYMOON MATCHUP WITH : HOBIE BROWN

— honeymoon :

– hobie thinks it's a little funny, honestly, how things turned out with you — the two of you are almost polar opposites, but you know what they say ; opposites attract, and you were his missing puzzle piece — hobie didn't like labels, but there was no denying that he certainly had a thing for you, and you couldn't deny that you liked him either, so you settled in middle ground.

– hobie would come to your place every night — that's how it started, you'd watch a movie or two and once the clock strikes midnight, you find yourself laying in bed with him, huddled up in his arms with your head resting on his chest and his face buried in your hair, the two of you talk about alot of stuff, jumping from one topic to another about completely unrelated things — he likes listening to you talk, likes the sound of your voice and how it immediately soothes him into a good mood — but once the clock nears five am, and you start mumbling and tripping on your words and your eyelids become heavy, he places a soft kiss on your lips, telling you it's time for bed before holding you close and the two of you eventually fall asleep.

– hobie has a knack to convincing you to do things you wouldn't usually do, like going out with him at three am on a supposed 'date' where he takes you to one of the city's highest rooftops with a couple of snacks and the radio playing your favourite songs, he likes to draw and often brings his sketchbook to those dates, so the two of you doodle on the pages, slapping stickers on them and creating a perpetual memory, and he thinks — actually, believes, that no matter what, he'd never forget you, and he has reached a conclusion that maybe, just maybe, he may be in love with you.

— what's on the radio : moonlight, kali uchis

a/n : hello??? kirishimas-manly-eyeliner ?? 😭😭 i used to follow you, i loved your blog sm and you were legit one of my inspirations to write 😭😭 i didn't know you were aware of my blog holy shit, i love you so much 😭 thank you for the request and your ask was so much fun to read like shejwkwk, you're such a nice person help 😭 thank you sm for the request again, ily — also atsv was so good, i cried alot during the moving so you aren't alone, and i loved hobie's animation ! i loved the way they colored him and how he looked like he was out of a panel and the way he changed colors (??) it was so good, he's one of my faves pls 😭 i hope this did you justice and that you like it ! once again thank you sm for the request <33

[flutteringfable]

finally found the time to watch generation loss and oh??? my gosh!????? i love ranboo’s stuff and i already had high expectations from hearing all the buzz about it but this totally blew me out of the park in a way i didn’t expect at all.

go watch it, even if you aren’t into ranboo it’s a great thing on its own. it starts a little slow but that’s on purpose!! just trust the process, as they say <3 (i’m using that in the wrong context i know but shhhhh)

anyway time to scream about it in an essay long post because i’m so incredibly normal about this series and not being a horror/arg nerd about it at all nope no way why would you think that ahaha.

[spoilers ahead! there’s only three episodes, all up on their vod channel and about an hour each! it’s so worth a watch!!]

okay, so, episode one was nothing like what i was expecting right off the bat.

i’ve seen the stuff on the actual genloss channel, and i figured it would all be sort of that vibe. imagine my surprise upon seeing ranboo sneeg and charlie being a little bit silly in a cabin in the woods (and also christian hell? for some reason?). i stuck through it, though, no matter how taken aback i was. it was so worth it in the end, but i’ll get to that later teehee <3

the cyoa aspect was cool! i wish i had been there to see it live, because i’m the biggest sucker for choice based stories and arg-style games.

not much more to say abt ep1, to be honest. just know that it’s definitely a completely different vibe than what you’ll probably expect (ranboo said this was on purpose!!). oh also i love squiggles he is everything to me. a little guy. a blorbo even. even if he uh, did turn out to be evil like i originally suspected.

ep 2! this one was almost equally silly in nature, but you can see the “cracks” begin to show a lot more in this one. (“why is cracks in quotes?” you may ask. well, iykyk, and if you don’t, watch episode three.)

the puzzler was great, i think it was hilarious that the mask was basically just how he looked anyway. the beginning was a good hook, i genuinely thought we were getting into the juicy stuff when ranboo was locked in the chair.

when he found charlie, i’m ashamed to admit that i didn’t expect charlie’s guts to be slime. that’s his thing. he’s a goopy gushy guy. i should’ve known. anyway. the part where the “illusion” starts to break and the slime turns to blood for a moment?? DELICIOUS. SO GOOD. MWAH.

NIKKI’S SUDDEN SWITCH IN HER INTRO ON THE CAROUSEL????? so good. everyone’s acting was incredible tbh especially in ep 3, i’m so happy. the silly death dialogue from ethan was great (until it wasn’t. iykyk, i’ll get to it), too. THE HAT BIT??? WHERE THEY REPROGRAMMED SNEEG??? AAA?????? so in love with this episode, it was the perfect transition to the hell that is ep 3.

okay so. ep 3. where do i start omg. i guess at the beginning, that makes sense.

i was really excited to finally have a name for hatch! honestly, even though my villain-senses were sounding off all sorts of alarms in my head, i was fooled for a short while as he was guiding ranboo. learning about the drones was interesting, too. lots of good lore built around the company and those guys! very cool ^^

WHEN RANBOO WENT AGAINST THE AUDIENCE AND CHOSE THE YELLOW CODE. IM RUNNING OUT OF WAYS TO EXPRESS MY EXCITEMENT AND AWE,,,,, UHHHH YIPPEEE???? I GUESS????? that was the thing that really set me off about hatch being maybe not so great. good stuff!!!!

ranboo finding the streamers pretty much locked in those mall restaurants!! AND CHARLIE DOING AN ACTUAL STREAM DURING IT!!!!!! gah, this series is so cool!!!!!! them constantly on the run from the drones and security (TERRIFYING monster, btw, i love when evil dystopian corporations have monsters as security <3) was so wild to watch. i don’t think i’ve been that anxious for the main characters of a series for quite some time.

them seeing the cabin set. ohhhhh my gosh. and then charlie dying (? presumably) at the hands of security before ranboo hits the button to stop everything. graaagh i ate that UP. again i’m running out of ways to express my love for this series lmaoo.

the “ending.” oh my goodness the fakeout “ending.” i was so thrilled, so happy for ranboo i let my guard down and was like “yes!!!! evil bad guys stopped woohoo!!! get this guy some rest and therapy!!!”

and then they bowed.

when i tell you i GASPED. like it was my fault for not checking the time on the video and having my guard down but i GASPED.

hatch letting the audience choose if ranboo lived or died. hearing ranboo scream and beg to be set free, and then beg to die…. i genuinely teared up. despite the rather grim choice to have them die, i think it was for the best. though i do wonder what would have happened if the votes stayed 50/50….. if anyone knows if ranboo has talked about that anywhere, do let me know! if not, i’ll shoot them an ask about it, because i’m sure it would’ve been interesting.

anyway, this series was so much cooler than i ever could’ve imagined. i was already invested in the stuff on the genloss channel, like i mentioned, but seeing the project for myself and getting to watch this incredible series was breathtaking. i’m a huge nerd for dystopias and horror, and ranboo somehow nailed combining them both with great comedy and a great story.

and i’ve heard it’s been nominated for an emmy? or something???? that’s literally so cool!!!! i wish ranboo the best of luck in future projects, genloss was a fantastic watch and i can’t recommend it enough <3