#now it’s more like oh I’m disabled? how can I make my life easier

[lokilysolbitch]

god bless Jessica kellgren-fozard and any other disabled creator responsible for rewiring my brain at the age of like 15 so that learning im disabled and need mobility aids did not ever feel like a death sentence

[attiredpan]

Okay so I added You’ll Play Your Part to my Nog Playlist and I’m gonna ramble about the lyrics and stuff cause holy fuck that’s a Nog Song™️ if I’ve ever heard one.

Content Warnings for discussion of depression and suicidal ideation in relation to It’s Only A Paper Moon.

Okay so starting with Twilight's verse in application to Nog’s storyline, I have two or three spots where I feel it’s most relevant; directly after Heart Of Stone/Facets and directly after It’s Only A Paper Moon.

Both leave him resolute to move forward but undoubtedly uncertain, whether for one reason or another. On one hand, you have him breaking away from something he had been raised with his whole life, that he’s watched his family try to fit themselves into and fail, miserably. And even after getting that confirmation from Sisko that yeah, he’s been recommended to the Academy, there’s still so much uncertainty in whether or not he’ll make it.

Not even mentioning how much Quark is being an absolute ass about it, going as far as to attempting sabotage on Nog’s entrance exams to keep him from getting in. But thanks to Rom being one of the best dads on the station, he does get in. He’s found that purpose, he is making those contributions, and he is part of the plan.

And with post-Paper Moon the ‘future that I can’t see’ line has a lot more weight to it, as for a majority of the episode we see him coming to terms with his disability and the trauma that comes with it, going through what I see as a major depressive episode and passively suicidal ideation.

And as someone who’s been through a similar situation(ie. a major depressive episode with all the suicidal ideation that comes with it) in moving forward from it, the future feels nonexistent because you never thought you’d make it this far. And then you do and you’re stuck the thought of ‘Now What?’ and you’re not entirely sure of what to do.

In Nog’s case though, he had something to return to, and goals to move forward towards, which I feel might’ve made the adjustment post-Paper Moon a little easier. Still difficult as all hell, but a little easier.

Now moving on to the other princesses and who I feel takes those roles in both spots.

With the Heart of Stone/Facets portion, I feel like Sisko, Rom, and Jadzia take up these spots. Sisko as Celestia, Jadzia as Luna, and Rom as Cadence.

In MLP, Celestia is the one who sends Twilight off to Ponyville, just as Sisko is equivalently sending Nog off to the Academy via that recommendation letter. And in watching Facets we get a sense of how hard Jadzia worked to earn the right of being a joined Trill and I feel like she’d recognize that sort of stubborn endurance in Nog and understand why it’s so important to him.

And while Cadence is Twilight’s older-sister-figure-turned-sister-in-law, the way she reassures Twilight in this song very much reminds me of how Rom acts as a father towards Nog and stands up to Quark and allows Nog to both apply and go to Starfleet despite Quarks saying otherwise.

Moving on to the Paper Moon part of this; Vic takes up Sisko’s place as Celestia, Rom takes up Jadzia’s place as Luna, and Jake takes up Rom’s place as Cadence.

“Your destiny is uncertain, and sometimes that’s hard to take’, is quite literally the synopsis of Vic’s little speech to Nog before he finally leaves the holosuite. There’s no telling what’s gonna happen to him if he leaves and as hard as that is, he has to face that.

And I will stand by this for as long as I live but Rom and Nog had some of the best character development out of any of the secondary cast of characters, development that can rival even the main cast. (heh, mane cast(plz laugh))

Rom has gone from being the antsy not even second hand under Quark to being a major player not just on the station but in the war effort against the Dominion. In reflection, I can see him recognizing that same want for something more than what Ferengi society expects of him that Nog has, that Nog inspires in him.

And oh my fucking god I’m gonna lose it about Jake/Jake and Nog’s friendship for a hot minute because watching your best friend go from the local troublemaker aside from yourself to not only a respected officer in one of the major military forces in the quadrant, the same one that your own father is a part of, but also a victim of war that you also are is going to be fucking rough.

That the two of you have come so far from when you first met, ending up so far from where expectations put the two of you. That while both of you have witnessed the horrors of war, you got out with only a few scrapes, being able to move on from it because someone was there and experienced it with you and told you that your feelings were warranted and that you didn’t have to be ashamed of being scared, your best friend, on the other hand, lost a fucking limb, has felt like his problems with phantom pain were chalked up to just something in his head. That he’s just crazy. Your friend is now isolating (in one of the CMO’s holosuite programs no less) from everything and everyone and no one knows how to help him.

And the one time you try to visit him you end up getting socked in the jaw. Every attempt made just seems to push him further away. And then like a month or so later, on top of the three he’s already spent in intensive physical and mental therapy, he comes back out and moves back in with you.

I see it as initially being very tense. Both of them just trying to go about their days in the aftermath and move forward, not knowing how to acknowledge or begin to talk about what happened. And when they do finally sit down and talk about it, it’s probably just as gut-wrenching as when the news of Nog’s injury first reached Jake.

In cliche archetypes/dynamics, I’ve always thought of Jake and Nog as Sun/Moon, the position of who’s which switching. Prior to Nog going into Starfleet, I had Jake pegged as the Moon and Nog as the Sun, but afterward, it switched; Jake is now the Sun and Nog is now the Moon.

Either way, one can’t fully shine without the other.

They’re a packaged deal and to separate them just feels wrong. They love each other. They’ve stuck by each other through so much, I can’t see them just not trying to fix things after Paper Moon. It’s hard, but damnit if they’re not gonna try.

Rewatching The Emissary, you know it’s gonna be a while coming but his time will come soon.

As the Sun rises, so does the Moon

As love finds a place in every heart

He’ll be a captain, he’ll play his part

[crippled-punk-guy]

Just a quick warning that this gets pretty heavy. I usually don’t feel the need to add warnings but if discussions of medical neglect bother you please don’t read this for your own sake.

Getting run around in circles by doctors again. One doctor says I need genetic testing to confirm. The genetics office says it’s not necessary because having a diagnosis won’t stop the symptoms(?). And my pcp’s receptionist basically said it’s out of their hands and there’s nothing more they can do. Which I understand they’re just general practice I’m not blaming them, but what is the actual point of having an EDS specialist if all they do is tell you “oh yeah you definitely have it. But knowing for sure won’t change anything. So instead of getting the diagnosis that would help you get access to other tests you need and equipment you shouldn’t have to pay for yourself we’re going to dismiss you and subtly imply you should shut the fuck up”. So what do I do now. I was told to call the genetics office that I’ve already been to before and tell them everything I have before knowing they’ll say the same damn thing again and again until I finally give up.

So essentially, I more likely than not have either Classical like or Hypermobile type but they won’t test to confirm because “it won’t change anything”. Except it will. It would make doctors stop thinking I’m crazy. It would make my insurance company have more reason to listen. It would make it easier to at least know what complications I’m at risk for. But none of that matters. Because there’s no cure. Even though two physical therapists that specialize in this agree that I have it and two primary doctors have aswell, all of whom say I need genetic testing because they’re genuinely worried about me and have said before they can’t believe that I’ve been denied testing.

So what do I do now. I’ve done what I’m supposed to. For six fucking years I’ve seen doctor after doctor trying to figure out what’s going on in the first place. And when one of them has an answer that makes sense and my other doctors agree with they say it’s not important enough. Well it’s important to me. And every other patient dealing with the same shit. It’s important to me because my joints are getting worse. It’s important because I’m having heart and blood pressure problems. It’s important because I’m having other issues I won’t share here.

So when does it become important enough? When my neck finally becomes so unstable it causes a chain reaction of other problems? When I can barely walk because of pain and dislocations and falling? When it’s impacting my eating and sleeping and every moment of my life?

Is that important enough yet.

Or are you going to just wait for me to die so you can avoid diagnosing someone else with this disorder and keep saying it’s so rare you don’t need to bother with it.

Why is this condition treated like this. Why is it “not important enough to test for” when it has life limiting and life threatening complications.

This is why patients turn to the internet. This is why patients lose faith in medicine. And I’ll let you in on a secret, I have great insurance. I am incredibly privileged to still be on my parent’s insurance, imagine how much harder it would be for someone who isn’t.

In conclusion, I’m just going to start telling my doctors I essentially have hEDS. Many doctors have agreed, I have a diagnosis of hypermobility, they just refuse to make the wording more clear or do testing to rule out other possibilities. I have all the symptoms. I have for years since my literal childhood. And they’ve gotten worse. Slowly at first and now very concerningly quickly.

But it’s “just being flexible” right? It’s not like it’s completely disabled me or anything. No biggie. /s

[dark-muse-iris]

Pre-dystopian era truly encapsulates pre 2020 now doesn't it? 😂 The things the last 2 almost 3 years have brought forth in humanity is 👀 disappointing at the best of times.

I'm surprised to see just how the app has changed, as I haven't had the chance to hop on desktop just yet. It seems...almost functioning? No more character limit on asks is nice as now I don't have to break this into 6 different messages 😂 New settings and everything else to try and figure out.

I've turned 24 this last July, and the last time I was truly active on here I was 21 so the personal growth and loss that have come with that is interesting for sure. I've lost both my grandmas in the past year and my living grandfather has already remarried (oh boy the family drama that caused), moved twice and live with my boyfriend of 3 years, have gone NC with his narc family and LC with mine as best as possible, started a job that has me earning the most I ever have financially but definitely have cost a part of my soul 💀😂 and I'm trying my best to get to a place in my life where I'm debt free and in a industry I actually love and care for (cannabis and growing it) and get my boyfriend the disability coverage he needs but I'm sure you're well aware that its a poor joke of trying to get that approved. So on some notes, its been good and I've changed into a better person but also if anything bad happens in 2023 I'm very fragile about it 😂😅

I understand the "striving for mediocrety" as a workplace mentality, and just how exhausting it can feel with wanting to bring better things to the office and just getting shot down. The old dodgers of "this is how we've always done it" dont always seem to realize that doing the same thing for 40+ years only works when the system isn't as broken as it is (or if it even worked in the first place). Is being remote going to give you the chances to take care of your sleep issues and anything else health related thats popped up for you? Ik last I checked you were doing the testing to see if it was more than standard narcolepsy.

(I'll probably message again and finish my thoughts but I am night shift and my break just ended so I gotta head back. It's so nice talking to you again ☺️💕)

I’m sorry to hear about your grandmas. I lost two of mine since 2020 and it’s been really hard on the family. If my grandfather had remarried that quickly, I’d be scratching my head as to how they were able to make it happen. My grandfather doesn’t appear to be dating, but that’s likely because 1) he cooks, and 2) he’s got stage 4 cancer, courtesy of U.S. chemical warfare in Vietnam.

As someone who works in a soul-sucking job that pays well, let me just say: it’s worth it. It is absolutely worth it to have a full belly and warm place to sleep during recession years. When I worked in industries I loved and didn’t have enough to eat, I resented my dreams and hated myself for having them. Letting those dreams go gave me the chance to have other dreams and I’ve been able to forgive myself for being so hard in my early 20s. It can take years to get the life you want, so don’t let anyone shit on you for doing what you have to do to eat in the meantime, especially anyone of the older generations who did their part to suppress our standard of living.

The insistence on clinging to broken systems of the past is one big reason I transferred jobs. There’s a lot of that still going around. My managers were panicking and kept asking why I was leaving; I think they finally understood how far I’m willing to go to make sure “office culture” won’t waste my time anymore. For me, being a remote employee streamlines my workflow and reduces my workplace accommodations for narcolepsy by half. It’s also much easier to manage my ADHD at home where I can remove distractions. In the office, no one was working on our job shit; everyone just gathered around to talk about their kids or health problems or ridiculous work drama they didn’t plan on fixing themselves. I had forgotten how much time people wasted just bitching for nothing. When I hear a complaint, I want to fix the problem and get rid of it, but that wasn’t a good fit. My colleagues wanted free therapy from someone their kid’s age because *surprise* their kid isn’t talking to them anymore.

I’m hopeful for cannabis and glad you’re pursuing the field! It’s not fully legal where I live, but I have many chronically ill family and friends who rely on it because they can’t take meds or afford the healthcare they need. I have some family who are growers in different states where it’s allowed and they’re happy with the work they’re doing. I never had the green thumb for that; I’m the only who would take dead grass and make a basket out of it.

[thecpdiary]

My Hypersensitivity Disorder

This desire to change autistic people and ‘normalise’ them is because “it is easier to change the individual rather than society,” says Steve Silberman.

“And when I'm looking at it, it's all coming in really, really quickly. It's like swamping, there's one aspect of my Asperger’s that you may not expect. You see, I experience the world in a very different way to pretty much everyone else. There's like a hyper imagine like a hyperreality. It's not just about seeing, it's about hearing, it's about smelling, it's about tasting is about everything. I mean, there's a very distinct smell of this time of spring, it's quite ripe, it's quite moist. So, if it rained, now, this afternoon, the smell would change quite radically, and it would be much more intense. Sound wise, obviously, is that jet that's going over, I can hear the traffic and the distance, and then you've got the natural sounds that are here. So that was a blackbird rattling over there. As Robin's calling hours of Blackbird calling now. I can hear blue tits going. Oh, just had chaffinch sing. This layer of birdsong going on. This sensory overload is a constant distraction. And it's had a hugely isolating effect on me ever since I was a small boy.”- Chris Packham (Source: https://otter.ai)

Like Chris Packham, I also experience the world in a very different way to everyone else. Truthfully, sensory overload will manifest itself differently in each autistic person. In ‘normal every-day situations that aren’t intense or magnified’ I am normal, but if a situation changes and it becomes intense, it also becomes a challenge and everything becomes ‘3 to 5 times' more magnified.

Cutting my Cloth

I tend to have to steer clear of situations where I experience sensory overload, but around illness or a terminal illness this is where I become unstuck, because any illness becomes magnified, and which is why I then have to make the painful decision not to go in.

Trying to navigate illness

When my twin took ill a few weeks ago, and was later diagnosed with terminal cancer, I tried to do the right thing. Pushing myself forward, I found myself having to navigate a ‘hospital situation’ where through sensory overload, I continually felt panicked and out of my depth. People's illness becomes more pronounced. Where Chris Packham talks about hyperreality, around illness... this is very much an issue for me.

Sensory Overload

In an illness situation in hospital, it’s not just seeing what I’m seeing around the visuals, but it's all the sensory overload distractions, like airborne smells, including the hospital smell and food preparations that permeate the corridors and patients' rooms; the bright lights, the machinery keeping patients well and/or alive, the hustle and bustle of people hurriedly walking to see their loved ones, the echo of their conversations in corridors talking about their loved ones, the look of despair on their faces, their concerns and worries as they continue to talk about their situation, other people's blank expressions, expressions of disbelief, these all contribute to sensory overload.

Sensory Magnification

It is also watching the decline of your loved one, who is beginning to looking sickly, deathly even, which is magnified 3 to 5 more times. All those things, change the way you are able to deal with things around hypersensitivity. instead of physically turning up, working behind the scenes, I making sure my twin and her family have everything they need, so they can continue to look after my twin successfully. I hate how my hypersensitivity makes everything so isolating.

Throughout my life, without knowing about my disability and knowing about my disability now, the constant sensory overload has always been a continual distraction, one that is difficult to navigate and one that is hugely isolating. Around autism it blights and continues to blight my life, but it also doesn't help when there are miscommunications from those who think we need to get past 'sensory issues’ which they should know is impossible to do.

Only someone who is autistic will understand what that really means and simply put, will not judge. Thank you, ‘Chris Packham,' for speaking out on all our behalf.

For more inspirational, life-changing blogs, please check out my site https://www.thecpdiary.com

[poettheythem]

Things I’ve discovered as a disabled person with many disabled friends

ok so mostly have mental disabilities and most of them are pretty mild but they do still impact my life in a lot of different ways. I’m only now starting to accept myself as someone with a disability instead of all that BS they told me in school of me being “just fine” and being a “special thinker” but here are my observations

Schools don’t care about your disability if it’s not very visual. My friend in a wheelchair is the only person to have gotten any type of aid. He still has so many problems in the school and they won’t fix them. Then there’s my friends who need times to step out of the classroom at times or also need help with mobility and the school will not provide them the accommodations.

other people 9 times out of 10 are going to be your biggest day to day problem. Wether you’re autistic or a can user. Other people will question you 24/7 and pretend they know more than you about your body and mind. Other people will discard your pain or your issues because you’re “too young” or “look healthy” with no concern to you for real. A teacher of mine tried to argue once that my friend had LESS issues because of her sever ADHD. She did not listen to how it caused her severe depression and made it hard to function and do simple things like shower and said it made her better because she is “more creative”. That’s not even true. I love my friend but she is not creative.

Life gets easier when you find others who learn how to adapt or others who are willing to learn. My best friends all are almost all disabled. We ask questions and learn from each other. Also because a lot of my disabilities are mental it helps to have other people who can think in similar ways that I do. But also my nondisabled friends are all willing to listen to me and just be kind. Me and my friends learned from my friend in a wheelchair. We learned about his disability and how it impacts him. So we also notice when he’s doing something dumb for his body and make sure he STOPS DOING THE THING THAT HURTS HIM

STOP DOING THE THING THAT HURTS YOU. most younger people with disabilities tend to push themselves. EVERY SINGLE PERSON I KNOW DOES THIS. Don’t push yourself so hard that the next day you feel like you’re going to die and still go into work.

even if places advertise being disability friendly they are mostly not great at it. I went to the aquarium and we had to use the elevator. It was so small my friends and I had to take multiple trips to get up to the next floor together. We even had to go into a back hallway, staff only, area to get out of the aquarium. Listen there are some places that are good but more often then not we all end up having to plan ahead and miss out of things because places don’t put in something simple like a ramp.

why does everyone think wheelchair user can not use their legs. People need to learn some basic ass facts.

most people have ended up trying to hide their disabilities. Especially if they’re invisible ones. And why is that. Oh yeah because people who pretend they know you better than yourself and even your doctor are the worst. What fun

The number of disabled people that are people pleasers. You are not a burden for being disabled. People make your out to be and governments, schools, museums, and restaurants that are not accessible are the real problem not you.

[mypoisonedvine]

𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙫𝙮 𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙖𝙡 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧 (𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘐) || sub!bucky barnes x dominatrix!reader

𝙨𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙮 || every client is different, with different needs; but this client is, in every way, exceptional.

𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩 || 5k

𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨 || smut (cnc), dom/sub relationship, ‘mistress’ title, pain kink, cockwarming, orgasm denial/control, use of a cockring, slapping, objectification/degradation, some angst and hurt/comfort, crying after sex, touchstarved!bucky

new parts posted on thursdays!  join the taglist here

"And you can promise complete and total discretion?” the deep and husky voice on the other end of the line repeated, low enough that it was almost a whisper.

You laughed a little. “Of course,” you answered. Most clients were serious about privacy, but this guy was next level. He must be famous, you thought to yourself, or married. Or both.

But just as much as your clients wanted to keep you separate from their personal life, you would rather they know nothing about who you are. Of course it was always a risk, since nobody could hide their face and you had to work out of your apartment, but you did what you could to keep your job just that— a job.

You told your friends you were a consultant, because people didn’t question that. Sure, it was hard to keep up the lie sometimes when you got last-minute bookings and had to cancel plans, but it was worth it for the money these men were willing to pay.

And this new guy? He was shelling out all kinds of cash, on a long set of conditions. Including an NDA. You wouldn’t have given him up either way, but if the contract made him feel better (and made him pay more) then you were happy to sign it.

“So it’s all anonymous, then? No ID, no credit card…?” he pressed.

“I mean, if cash is easier for you—”

“It is.”

You were starting to worry that this was a major red flag, as if he didn’t want to be traceable back to you at all. It was almost a dealbreaker, until you glanced down at the legal pad you’d written his offer on and remembered that you couldn’t afford to turn him down. “Then cash is fine,” you decided, making a note to yourself to have 911 already dialed when he came by in case his aversion to ID was really about a desire to get away with something.

“When can we start?”

“Um, well the soonest I can do is tomorrow at seven” you explained.

"Great, I'll be there," he answered firmly, apparently about to hand up.

“Hey, hey, slow down!” you chuckled. “Can I at least get a name?”

“I didn’t think we needed to do names.”

“We don’t… but if you’re willing, I’d like to know something to call you.”

“James,” he answered after a tense pause. “James is fine.”

“Alright, James, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Upon opening the door, you instantly noticed three things about him: he was tall, he was big, and he was sexy.

You had sort of been hoping that his appearance wouldn’t match his voice, but it did, and it was going to make this so much harder.  Maybe easier in a few ways, but overall worse.  It was important that you didn’t get too emotionally invested with your clients.

His eyes were dragging over you like he was just as taken aback.  Which was odd, because he must have seen your picture online before he called you.  

“James,” you greeted. “Glad you made it.”

You stepped aside to let him enter, guiding him to take a seat in your living room.  Before clients came by, you hid any signs of life and kept the space as neutral as possible, which was why the only furniture was the white couch he sat on, the black chair across from it, and a glass table in between.

You sat in the black chair and crossed your legs, noticing with pride the way his eyes studied your every move.

“It’s important that we have a discussion about boundaries and limits before this goes any further," you explained sternly, and he nodded slightly.  "Tell me what you do and don't want."

“Uh, well, I guess I was just looking for… somebody who can administer, um, discipline… you know, someone who sets rules and enforces them.  But could also be kind of, uh, sweet I guess, to.  Not too sweet, just… not too mean either."

You smiled a little; he sounded right up your alley.  "I can do that."

"You should know I… I have a… disability.  My left arm it's, um, it's a prosthetic."

"How would you like me to accommodate that?"

"Just don't say anything about it, please.  Treat it like a normal arm.  And, uh, if you could ignore my scars, too…" he added awkwardly.

"Of course,” you nodded, “I would never want to make you feel insecure."

"Well, I mean, I'm not against degradation," he admitted sheepishly, making you smile a little.

"Right: that's different.  Anything else you're distinctly not against?"

“I can take a lot of pain,” he explained matter-of-factly.  “However much you think I can handle, double it.  I wanna feel it.”

You could almost hear the words he wasn’t saying: I wanna feel something.

“Okay, we can do that.  You’ve probably heard of the color system," you posited.

“I haven’t.”

"Oh."  That threw you off slightly… how new was he to this scene?  “Well, it’s traditionally green, yellow, red; like a stoplight.  Red means stop.  Yellow means proceed with caution.  Green means continue.”

“Sounds simple enough.”

“Too simple for me, in fact.  I have my own version: ‘red’ will make me stop what I’m doing, but only ‘black’ ends the scene entirely.  And then there’s ‘blue.’  That means you want more.”

He smirked a little; a strong show of emotion compared to his stoicism so far.  “I think I’ll use that one most.”

“Just don’t be afraid to use anything else, alright?  I’d never be disappointed in you for safewording, or even just needing a break.”

He nodded.  “Can we get to it then?”

“You’re rushing as always,” you laughed.  “I’m not charging you for this part.  We have plenty of time— don’t we?”

“Yes, but—” he sighed.  “You look really… I walked in and, I guess I’m just really looking forward to this.”

You almost would’ve smiled at the compliment but you thankfully suppressed it.  “And what is it that you’re looking forward to?  What do you want me to do to you?”

His jaw tightened as he looked away from you.  “Um, there’s a lot.”

“Enlighten me.”

“Ropes.  Strongest you have.  I can buy you stronger ones if you need them, for next time…”

He’s already thinking about next time?  He’s already thinking about buying me things?

“Alright, I can do ropes: wrists and ankles?  Or more than that?”

He seemed a bit confused by that question.  “Is there anywhere else?”

“Torso,” you enumerated, “neck—” you stopped because you saw his reaction to that, and it made you smile a bit.  “Okay, so maybe the neck is something to try.  Do you like being choked?”

“I… I don’t know…” he sighed.

“Have you ever been choked before?”

“Not… sexually...”

You felt your eyebrows rise, but didn’t want to press; a story for another time, perhaps.

“We’ll have to discuss silent safewords and signals so you can tap out, but if you’d be willing to try it—”

“Yes.”

You laughed.  “Eager, are we?”

He swallowed, and you wondered if you shouldn’t have let your ‘dom voice’ slip out in that moment… but he looked so good flustered like that.  He adjusted himself slightly in his chair and you hoped he was already hard.  And with that thought in mind, you couldn’t stop yourself from teasing him further.

“Do you like being called certain things?” you asked, voice lower as you leaned forward.  “How do you feel about ‘pet’?” 

He almost kept up his poker face, but his gaze faltered at the same time he moved in his chair again.  “Um, ‘pet’ is okay.”

“Baby boy?”

“Not really my speed,” he shrugged.

You slipped out of your chair and stood up, approaching him slowly as the click of your heels echoed across the tile.  He watched you with wide eyes and quickening breaths.

“What do you like?  Tell me,” you demanded, though you kept your tone light.

“Uh,” he paused, watching your hand as it rested on his leg, “I like… I like being called a good boy.”

You grinned as you pulled your hand away, watching him tense up with disappointment.  “I can do that,” you agreed, lifting his chin with a finger until he looked at you with those beautiful, desperate eyes, “if you actually are being a good boy for me.” “I will,” he promised quickly, “I’ll be so good.”

“Mmm, I bet you will,” you purred.  “So willing to please…”

“Tell me how,” he sighed as your hand trailed from his chin down to his chest, slipping under the loose collar of his henley and rubbing his chest.  “Tell me how to please you.”

“Well, for starters, I have a name, too: Mistress.”

He sighed like the wind had been knocked out of him, but nodded.

“And if I ask you a question, I expect you to answer ‘Yes, Mistress’ or ‘No, Mistress’.  Is that clear?”

“Uh-huh,” he agreed before suddenly correcting himself, “um, yes, Mistress.”

“I’ll let you have that one,” you frowned, “but further infractions will be punished.”

“Yes, Mistress; I’m sorry, Mistress,” he moaned, melting under your touch as your hand moved down to rub his thigh through his jeans.

“Now, just for fun,” you smiled, leaning down until your lips were nearly brushing his ear, “tell me what you want.”

“Please touch me, Mistress,” he sighed.

“But I am touching you.”

“Touch my… touch my cock," he clarified, adorably embarrassed. "It’s so hard for you…”

“We’ll get to that eventually.  Let’s go to the bedroom first, okay?”

However good he looked standing in your doorway half an hour ago, it was nothing compared to how he looked naked and hard and tied to your bed.

Yes, the prosthetic and the scars that attached it to his body were hard to ignore.  He had failed to warn you that it was metal, so you couldn’t hide the slight shift of your face when it caught the light; you hoped he didn’t think it was a look of judgment or disgust, because you truly didn’t think it was anything upsetting.  Maybe the scars were a little worrying… but they didn’t seem to bother him now, at least physically.

But truly, if anything was distracting about his body, it wasn’t the arm.  It was his muscles— no wait, it had to be his cock, right?  It’s tough to call: on one hand, his entire body was toned and hardened beyond the peak of human conditioning, his thick thighs making your mouth water already, his chiseled abs almost making you jealous; but on the other hand, between those lovely thighs and curving up against those perfect abs was a cock that rivalled anything you'd ever seen before, with a blue vein running up one side and a drip of precum rolling down the other.

You finally sauntered up to the bed and ran your fingers over the taught ropes, pretending to ignore him watching you impatiently.  It was almost hotter knowing that he could pull out of the ropes if he really wanted to.  More than most, he was choosing to submit to them and to you.

“How’s this knot feel?  Too tight?” you hummed, tugging the rope just beside his wrist and watching his hand move limply with it.

“No, it’s good.”

You stepped back to the foot of the bed and stripped slowly, peeling off your black dress to reveal a matching lace set underneath.  You left your heels on as you stepped out of the dress and kicked it aside.

Turning back to face him, James looked like he was all but drooling.  You could see in his eyes how much he wished the ropes weren’t holding him back so he could run his hands all over your body.

But you could tell he craved being denied what he wanted, by the way his cock flexed of its own volition.

You let yourself smile as you crawled your way up the bed and over his body, like a panther stalking its prey, and boy did he look ready to be devoured.

"Are you scared?" you asked quietly.  He shook his head.  "Are you ready?"

He nodded.  You sat up as you straddled him, positioned just right such that no part of you was really touching him, and watched with delight as he tugged against the ropes slightly to try to get closer.

"So needy," you grinned, somewhere between praising and scolding him.  Your fingers ghosted over his chest and he shivered; he asked you to treat his prosthetic like a normal arm, so you dragged your nails down the metal and watched his eyes flutter shut.  When you pulled your hand back and left him untouched again, he whined slightly.

“Aw, poor thing,” you pouted as you examined him, desperation emanating off of him in an invisible aura.  “Your cock is all red and leaking… it must hurt, doesn’t it?”

“Yes, Mistress,” he groaned.

“What if I touch it a little?” you offered.

“Please…”

You traced your fingers lightly up and down his length, tickling the skin and giving him the least pressure that you could.  He whimpered and you chuckled mockingly.  “I said I’d touch it a little, sweet boy, are you not satisfied?”

He bucked up into your touch as best he could, causing you to pull your hand away.  “Baby, please—” 

You cut him off with a slap to the face, as hard as you could muster.

“Mistress!” he corrected with a whine.  “Mistress, please… please wrap your hand around it.”

“Around what?” 

“Around… my cock.  Stroke me, please…”

“All you had to do was ask,” you grinned, finally tightening your hand around him and moving slowly up and down the shaft.  His head fell back with a soft moan, just from that.  Your teasing had certainly helped get him this worked up, but you knew it wasn't just that… he was plenty sensitive all on his own, apparently.

It made your mouth water.

"Does this feel good, James?" you asked huskily.

"S-so good," he whimpered, "please can you… stroke it a little faster, please, Mistress…"

"Hmm, not yet," you decided, feeling him tense up beneath you.  "Relax," you instructed with a free hand rubbing his thigh gently.  

You continued to teasingly stroke his length, never quite giving him the pressure or speed he needed to get closer to his release, savoring every whimper and whine and sigh from him along with the satisfying weight of his cock against your palm.

It felt like you'd never get tired of wielding so much power in your hand.

"Please," he sighed, "I need more…"

"You want me to stroke you faster?" you pressed, already knowing that wasn't what he meant.  He shook his head and you grinned, leaning in closer but letting go of his cock. 

Slowly, you let the lace covering your core rub up against his shaft, and his eyes nearly rolled back in his head.  "Ohhhhh," he moaned, "oh fuck, Mistress…"

You grinned and kept rocking against him, easily feeling the warmth of him through your panties— meaning he, in turn, could feel the warmth of you.  "How does it feel, baby?" 

"Good," he choked out, "really, really good… fuck, I want more, I need more, please…"

"Are you my good boy, James?" you asked in a low purr.  He nodded eagerly, Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed nothing.  "Do you want to be inside me?" you finally whispered against his ear, letting a finger run lazily up his spine and feeling him shiver so hard it was more like he was convulsing.

"Please, Mistress, I'll do anything…"

You didn't touch all of your clients sexually, due in part to the fact that they usually wanted a lot more pain than pleasure.  You'd only had sex with one or two of them, and it wasn't a routine thing.  Before today you never would've imagined doing this with a first-time client, but to be completely honest… he was fucking hot.  The kind of guy you'd be spreading your legs for instantly if you weren't at work and he wanted to buy you a drink or grab lunch.  And he was here, at your disposal, begging you for more.  How could you say no?  

You pulled your panties aside and gripped his cock tightly to guide it to your entrance, studying his face twisted in anticipation before sinking down and watching him gasp and sigh all at once, somehow.

It took a lot of effort to hide your own pleasure when he was stretching you out so perfectly, but you managed to suppress the desire to moan and just smile at his fucked-out expression instead.

Finally, your hips met with his and you got to sit there and enjoy the look of dawning agony as he realized you were staying completely still.

“Move, please,” he sobbed, “oh god, Mistress, please move…”

“But I thought you wanted to be inside me?  Isn’t this what you asked for?”

He whined and tried to wiggle his hips; all that got him was two hard slaps to the face.  

“No whining,” you instructed through your teeth.  “Good boys don’t whine.”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he whimpered, “‘m your good boy, I promise.”

“I know you are,” you grinned, “or at least, I know you can be.  Show me how good and patient you are.”

Reaching to the side a bit without getting off of him, you pulled a vibrator from your drawer.  His eyes went a little wide when he saw it, and you laughed.

"Don't worry, this isn't for you.  It's for me," you explained as you turned it on, inserting it between your body and his to touch the toy against your clit.  He winced as you sighed contentedly.  "Fuck, it feels good.  Can you feel it on your cock?"

"A… a little…" he hissed.

"I bet it feels good for you too," you posited, "but not good enough to make you come."

After a little pause, he nodded breathlessly.

"Good," you smiled.  "I just wanna come with your cock inside me.  I wanna know how it feels to get off with my favorite toy while being full of my newest toy."

"Fuck," he groaned.

"Do you like that, pretty boy?  Do you like me using your cock, being your Mistress' dumb little fucktoy?"

"Yes," he sobbed, hips shifting ever so slightly beneath you as he sought more stimulation from your flexing walls.  Shifting the vibe to hit right on your clit, you cried out— and he did too, at the feeling of you tightening around him.

"God, you love being Mistress' dildo, don't you?"

He nodded, biting hard on his lip until you worried he'd hurt himself.  He moaned again as another jolt of pleasure forced your channel to clench on his cock.

"You're making too much noise for a fucktoy, you need to be quiet."

He opened his mouth for a second, but closed it again and nodded instead.  

"You can do it yourself right?" you pressed, seeing him nod.  "You don't need me to gag that pretty mouth?" 

He whined but shook his head, keeping his lips pressed together.

That went on for a few more moments as you teased yourself with the vibe, hoping to draw this out for the sake of his struggle.  Wanting to up the ante, you took the vibe off your clit and turned it off for a moment.  "I think this would feel better with a little lube… will you get it wet for me, James?"

You brought the toy to his lips and he eagerly wrapped them around it, sucking lightly on the silicone with those pretty lashes resting on his cheeks.

"There you go, that's a good boy," you praised, pulling the toy from his mouth, "that's my good boy…"

"Yours…" he repeated weakly, "wanna be good for you, just for you…"

This time when you turned it on and pressed it to your clit again, you instantly gasped and felt your walls bare down on him; turning up the vibration, you actually moaned aloud and saw him wince.  "Oh, can you feel it now?" you asked tauntingly.  He bit his lip and nodded.

It really wasn't even intentional but you felt your hips start to rock, making him gasp as his eyes shot open.  For a guy who had been begging you to move not too long ago, he looked pretty overwhelmed by it now.

"Fuck, I'm gonna make myself come on your cock… do you wanna feel me come, baby?"

He seemed conflicted, which was exactly what you were going for.  You wanted him to struggle, just enough, between his need to satisfy himself and his desire to please you.  "I… I want to make you come, Mistress," he finally choked out, notably answering a slightly different question than the one you'd asked.  

You smiled and leaned in to whisper in his ear: "Are you afraid that if you feel me come around you, you won't be able to hold back?  That you might accidentally come inside me?"

He made a needy little groan and nodded.

"Don't worry, baby, I'm gonna help you," you promised sweetly, but of course as soon as he saw you grab a cockring from your drawer he changed his tune.

"N-no, Mistress, please," he begged with wide eyes, "I'll be good, just not that— don't put that on me."

You smirked and sat up, pulling off of him and slowly slipping the ring on his throbbing length as he quietly pleaded for mercy.  He winced when you pushed it down to the base of him, his cheeks burning hot red now.

"Is it a little too tight, baby?" you cooed, grinning when he nodded.  "Good."

You sank back down into him and let your hips grind on his, working your clit with the vibe and even kicking it up to the next highest setting.  He jolted beneath you, clearly feeling the vibrations strongly now, and you let the view of his beautifully broken facial expression egg on your own climax.

"Mm, I'm close, baby," you whispered, "just stay still and let Mistress use you like a good little boy."

He made a small noise through his teeth but seemed to manage okay, even when your walls began to pulse rhythmically around him and your head fell back, your free hand palming at your breast through the lace bra just to add that last little edge of sensation.

"Oh fuck, fuck," you moaned, "that's my good boy…"

You shakily pulled the vibe away and turned it off, still a little numb on your clit but feeling your channel still rippling slightly with aftershocks; he seemed to feel them in spite of their subtlety, if the panting breaths that filled his muscular chest rapidly were any indication.

As slow as you could manage, you pulled your body off of him and sat back on his legs to stare at his cock.  The remnants of your orgasm left plenty of lubrication to stroke it, focusing on the head which had turned almost purple now.

"M-Mistress," he groaned, writhing under your touch.

Amazingly, his cock was already flexing in your hand, and a growl of pride and hunger echoed in your chest.

“Oh fuck, can you come for me, James?” you moaned, pumping him so fast your hand was a blur.  “Can you be my good boy and come right through the cockring?”

“Yes,” he sobbed, “gonna come, Mistress, please—”

“Come right now,” you demanded, watching his face instantly fall slack as he spurted out onto his own chest and stomach, cock flexing and pulsing in your hands as his legs quivered and his hips thrusted wildly.

And the tears were flowing soon after.  You weren’t sure if it was sub drop or just the power of his release, but between weak sobs he whispered broken apologies.

“You did so good,” you cooed as you slipped off the ring and wrapped your arms around him, subtly trying to reach over to untie the ropes.  But you didn’t need to; he flexed his arms and the restraints popped like floss.  He embraced you in return as you let his head fall onto your chest.  “You’re so good, it’s okay,” you continued, stroking his hair.

“I’m sorry,” he repeated again, breathing quickly and wetting you with his tears.

This, you realized, is what he had made you sign the contract to protect.  It wasn’t that he was excessively embarrassed about his sexual proclivities, but that this was his space to be soft, and weak, and broken.  Apparently he wasn’t ready for anyone else to know that he wasn’t steel all the way down.

“Shh, it’s okay… you’re okay…” you breathed, indulging him in this moment even though it was more intimate than you preferred to get with customers.  Aftercare was an important part of your job, certainly, but so was enforcing boundaries.

He began to soothe as you kissed his forehead gently, whispering well-deserved affirmations and praise.  As his breathing slowed and moved back to normal, he pulled back and looked up at you.

“I’m sorry,” he repeated one more time, but not as wavering as before, “I didn’t think I would… that was unexpected.”

“No, it’s somewhat normal,” you exaggerated slightly, “this kind of thing… it’s taxing, I pushed you to your limits.  You were really tough, and it’s all very vulnerable.”

“Thanks,” he sighed, sniffling and wiping his eyes.  “And sorry about your ropes,” he smiled as he noticed the frayed ends coming off of where his wrists were still tied.

“Let me help you get those off,” you smiled, loosening the knots and sliding the binds off of him, quickly massaging the places that the rope had constricted.  “Blood flow’s okay?”

“Yep,” he nodded.

“You numb anywhere?” you pressed.

“Uh, just my dick.  And my brain is all fuzzy…” 

You smiled.  “Can’t help the first one.  Let me get you some water for the second.”

“No!” he yelped suddenly.  “Um, don’t go yet, please…”

“Of course,” you smiled.  “I’ll untie your ankles, then.”

He still seemed disappointed, as if he expected you to hug him for hours and never move.  He let you go this time, though, and loosened his grip so you could slide down to the foot of the bed.  

"Was that sort of what you were hoping for when you called me?" you asked as you untied the ropes slowly and took a moment to massage the skin underneath, hoping to restore any lost blood flow.

"So much better than what I was hoping for," he admitted with a breathless chuckle.  "You're… really good."

"Well, thank you," you shrugged, "it comes with practice and experience.  You held your own, too."

"I wish I could say that was from practice and experience.  I didn't want to say anything before but I've, uh, never actually… been to a domme before."

You smiled slightly, coming back up and being pulled into another embrace.  "Um, I'll admit I can kind of tell…" you mumbled.

"I'm not supposed to touch you like this," he realized quietly, relaxing his grip on you and pulling back.  "I'm sorry."

"No, it's alright, just don't get too comfortable because we only have—" you glanced at the clock— "eight more minutes until you need to leave."

"I'll get up and get dressed soon," he offered with a sigh as you got up and quickly slipped on a robe, grabbing him a damp washcloth for the drying come on his torso.

You tilted your head as you watched him clean up, and you wanted to offer some touch that was a bit less intimate than a hug, so you found yourself blurting out: "do you like having your hair played with?"

"Um, I don't… I don't know," he admitted as he reached up to card his fingers through the hair in question.  "No one else has ever really touched my hair before."

"Really?" you laughed, getting back on the bed to sit beside him.  "It looks pretty luscious.  I figured any girlfriend of yours would want to get her hands on it."

"Oh, well, the last time I had a girlfriend… it wasn't long then," he explained, and you kept on your best poker face.  His hair looked like he'd been growing it out for at least two years, unless it grew crazy fast or something.  How long had he been single?  With a body like that you could barely believe that he was single now.

"Do you mind if I touch it?" you offered quietly, and once he gave you a nod you reached forward and combed your fingers through it, reaching deeper to scratch at his scalp, occasionally pulling the strands lightly into loose braid-like patterns that fell away almost immediately afterwards.  He sank into your touch until you found yourself supporting his head against your chest, mindlessly playing with his hair until you noticed his eyes were shut, his breathing was slowed, and his body was limp on top of yours.

He fell asleep.

You laughed silently to yourself, realizing that you couldn't get him off of you without his cooperation since he was so heavy and you had no shot at lifting him.  And, of course, his cooperation required his consciousness… which required waking him up.

And, for some reason, you couldn't bring yourself to do it.  He just looked too peaceful, for a guy who had never seemed truly relaxed around you.

Was there any other way he could relax?  Cause it kinda seemed like he really, really needed this.  And you were in the business of meeting needs, to say the least.

So, with an apologetic text to your last client of the night that you needed to reschedule, you let James sleep on you as you closed your eyes and drifted off as well.

[catboyantichrist]

Hi there! Can you please do relationship headcanons of a gender neutral MC with autism and ADHD dating the seven brothers? I’d love to see more positive writing of a neurodivergent MC and how each of the brothers would love and respect them regardless of their disabilities. Feel free to do this if you want to. If not, that’s ok! Have a great day! 😁👍🌷🌹🌺🌸🌼🌻🌷🌹🌻🌼🌸🌺

This ask literally made me squeal- my neurodivergent ass is gonna have way too much fun with this- LMAO Just a warning, I'm basing this mainly off of my personal experiences (I have ADHD and am possibly getting tested for atypical autism in the future.). Ill try to be as broad as possible but I'd just like to give a heads up.

Just know that if you don't relate to this post or something in it, that doesn't mean you aren't valid! Everyone experiences neurodivergencey differently ^^

☆The Brothers Dating A GN!MC With Autism & ADHD☆

Day-to-day life has always been a struggle. As it feels like no human truly understands why you function the way you do. From bosses, to teachers, to neurotypical friends. Life can feel draining and like a chore when you're living in a world that doesn't function the way you do.

Then your world literally changes. You're in the devildom now. Most people would be terrified that they're living in a house full of demons. But you weren't. You felt like you finally belonged, and eventually you finally found love. Something that people assumed you'd never be able to find. Well jokes on them because your lover treats you with so much respect and kindness, and of course you do the same. This is some of what your lover does that just makes your heart spin:

Lucifer:

-Much to your dismay, before Lucifer started to get to know you he was similar to the humans you've encountered in the past. This doesn't last long though as one of the brothers (most likely Leviathan or Mammon) try to explain. He begins to go a bit easier on you, and also falls for you.

-When you guys start dating, he makes it his goal to help make your day-to-day life easier. Dare I say, he takes pride in it. (Hahahah aren't I funny?)

-He notices how you need a schedule to function, but how much you hate schedules. So with your permission, he makes a loose schedule and follows it WITH you. It simultaneously helps you function more than usual, and it helps Lucifer take breaks when he needs to.

-You two begin to do everything together, as doing stuff together and holding each other accountable is a lot easier than doing it alone

-If someone ever dares to make a rude comment about you Lucifer will um... "take care of them".

-If you ever get overstimulated from the environment you're in, Lucifer keeps his office wide open as a quiet place for you. He keeps a weighted blanket, some headphones and any stim toys you usually use in a corner of his office. If you're not comfortable with them out in the open he'll keep them in a special box somewhere in his office that others can't get into.

Mammon:

-Executive Dysfunction gang! The both of you are relieved that you understand each other and some dumbass wont just go "jUsT gEt Up aNd dO iT!"

-If you guys are struggling with it at different times, you'll try to help each other do small tasks that require very limited effort so that one of you don't get overwhelmed and stressed out. If its a particularly difficult day, you'll just stay there to support the other if they want that.

-If both of you are struggling that day, you do nothing ✨together✨ and just vibe with each others company.

-This man brings you shiny things. They don't even have to be worth anything, they're just shiny. You proceed to do the same. You two now have a designated spot for shiny things you bring each other. If you have an interest in art, you and him will probably end up using the shiny objects as art projects.

-A LOT of impulse shopping. You guys enable each other. Although you quickly realize that you impulse shop for each other. Every second day you end up bringing each other gifts and laughing about it after.

Leviathan:

-Y'know that arm thing two neurodivergent people do when they find out that the other person is neurodivergent? Yeah you two did that. And still continue to do that. It's your greeting now.

-You two spend tons of time either cuddling and talking about your special interests together, or both of you are pacing around Levi's room talking about your special interests together.

-And if you end up having the same special interest?? Oh man the serotonin you two both get just being AROUND each other.

-If you have a hard time around tons of people (in general or just at certain times) he's more than willing to share his room with you and for you two to do online school together. I mean hey, doing school by yourself online is difficult. (Even if it's more comfortable for you both)

-Will he get you a matching pair of noise cancelling headphones if you have auditory sensory issues, or if you just like the pressure on your head. (I don't know if that's a neurodivergent thing but I will wear my headphones just so that I feel some sort of pressure on my head)

-You both communicate what you need, and whether you need alone time or not. Making sure not to trigger any form of rejection sensitivity dysphoria for eachother.

Satan:

-If you were one of those neurodivergent kids that spent all of their time in the library, going through books like wildfire in middle school, get ready for that to be reignited.

-You two will read together all the time, and if you're having a day where you're more fidgety and don't wanna stay still, Satan is more than happy reading to you while you pace around.

-Satan has a natural curiosity, and loves to learn about anything that he doesn't already know about. So if you have a special interest about your own neurodivergency, he is more than happy to listen to you ramble about your life experiences and symptoms.

-Honestly, it doesn't even have to be about neurodivergency, Satan is happy to listen and learn about anything you're interested currently.

-If you aren't big on physical affection from humans or, well... humanoid people, that's perfectly fine! That's what animals are for! He'll take you to a cat cafe and will enjoy spending time with the animals with you.

-Similar to Lucifer, if anyone makes a comment about the way you act, they wont live to see another day. Unlike Lucifer, the demons who say these comments don't even finish their sentence. They're dead before MC blinks.

Asmodeus:

-When Asmodeus finds out that you have sensory issues that affect what you wear, he decides to hand-make clothes with fabrics of your choice. He has no issue with you prioritizing comfort over appearance, but if you want to put effort into your appearance and texture is stopping you, he's more than happy to design some stuff for you.

-Asmodeus has always been a touchy person, but if you aren't comfortable with that he'd never force you to cuddle. If you are interested in physical affection one of his favourite things to do is put makeup on your face, or just touch your face.

-Speaking of which, if you ever impulsively cut your hair whether it be from breakdown, normal impulsivity, or sensory issues with your hair being longer. He'll always help you cut your hair. He wants to make sure that once you cut it, you wont regret it the next day.

-Depending on whether you like going outside or not (or if its depending on the day) he's more than happy to take you to the fall! He'll make sure you're always comfortable and if you need the attention diverted from you if you need a break!

-If you don't like going outside, Asmo will dedicate certain nights for just you two to hang out. He can always energy match you. Hyperactive? Oh he's right there with you bouncing of the walls. Calmer? He doesn't mind just vibing with you. Comfort? Oh you've come to the right guy.

-Asmodeus is very emotionally intelligent, it may have originally been for the wrong purposes (charming others) but now he can use it to help you work through issues with socializing with others, past traumas from other people, he'll always do his best to support you as long as you'd do the same for him!

Beelzebub:

-Beel is always well meaning, but whether you're neurodivergent or neurotypical, communication is key with him. So, if you're unintentionally blunt to neurotypical people, that's exactly what Beel needs and wants. He knows you don't mean it out of harm, you're just trying to state your boundaries.

-Do you need a weighted blanket? This man will become the weighted blanket. He wants to make sure you're comfortable at all times!

-If you have trouble eating, Beel is here to help. If you take meds for ADHD and they make you lose your appetite, or just general forgetfulness, he'll remind you to have at least some sort of small snack throughout the day. Nothing too filling, just enough so that you aren't running on zero food throughout the day.

-All the go-to and comfort foods that you had in the human world? Beel would make it his MISSION to get them, and TONS of it too. It's the only food in the house he wont eat because he knows how important it is to you. He will tear up a bit if you offer to share though.

-If you're in a hyperactive mood, or anxious, Beel will convince you to do some light exercise with him to help calm you down

Belphegor:

-If you have trouble sleeping, Belphie will definitely try and help. Ranging from cuddling, aroma therapy, getting Beel to do exercise with you. To more magical means (if you're comfortable with it) like sleeping powder.

-If you just have a different internal clock than the average person, that's fine too! It may be permanent but that's okay- Belphie will sleep at any time with you.

-Isn't generally a social person so if you're not that big of a fan of social interaction you don't have to worry. Belphie would even do online school with you!

-He would let you use his pillows and blankets to stim if that's something you're interested in. He'd also listen to you ramble about your interests while doing so! As long as you don't mind him talking about the stars afterwards.

-Definitely the most blunt out of his brothers, so communication wouldn't be an issue between you two. If his bluntness is a bit too harsh for you he'll try to tone it down a bit, but it would probably just end up as him trying to explain the reasoning behind the bluntness and how it's not out of harm.

[chelseasasimmer]

Full offence but if you give people (more specifically teenagers/adults) shit for using gutter guards while bowling I am literally begging you to take a moment to self-reflect and consider the fact that you might have at least a little bit of deep-seated ableism to work through.

And I don’t mean that as ‘don’t make fun of people who use gutter guards because they might be disabled’. I mean, yeah, sure, a person might be using gutter guards because they have a disability that affects their ability to bowl (be it an issue of strength, coordination, vision, etc.) But, ya know, maybe they’re just a neurotypical able-bodied person who isn’t that great at bowling and, God forbid, doesn’t want to spend money just to roll a whole game of gutter balls. I don’t care if you think it’s not ‘real bowling’. You’re bowling for fun, not the fucking Olympics. It literally doesn’t fucking matter.

The real issue I’m trying to get at, though, is that if you give people shit for using some sort of aid to make their bowling experience more enjoyable, all you’re doing is contributing to the stigma disabled people face when it comes to altering activities to make their everyday lives easier/more enjoyable.

Ok, so I’m about to be vulnerable on the internet (big mistake, I know, but oh well).

I was diagnosed with autism less than a year ago, and every day since then has been a journey of unlearning the casual ableism that society has instilled in me for basically my whole life. I’m much better now than I was, but I’m still not perfect. I still struggle with internalised ableism much more than I’d like to admit.

I still get anxious about stimming in public. Even though I know stimming is good for me, and that forcing myself to not stim can lead, and has led, to emotional meltdowns and violent outbursts that could’ve easily been avoided had I not been so preoccupied with not wanting strangers to think I was ‘weird’.

I’ve only very recently started having my security blanket on my lap while I drive because I’ve realised it helps prevent me from getting stressed while I drive. Which is fucking great, because getting stressed while operating an entire fucking tonne of motorised metal is extremely dangerous, both to me and to others.

You know, I started crying while writing that. I started fucking crying because of how embarassed I was to tell the internet that I, an 18 year old, have a security blanket.

And this is exactly the point I’m trying to make. It doesn’t matter how insignificant taking the piss out of someone for using gutter guards while bowling may seem, it still feeds into the stigma disabled people face on a daily basis. It affects me so fucking much, and I have pretty low support needs, so I can’t even imagine how much it must affect disabled people with greater support needs.

Idk. Call me crazy, but I just think that whatever you need to do to make your life easier/more enjoyable you should be able to do it without judgement. That goes for disabled and non-disabled people alike. There’s literally no reason for you to spend your finite years on earth struggling unnecessarily.

[sugarmaplewings-fics]

Helping Their S/O Recover From Surgery

Pairing: BNHA Boys x reader

Warnings: Reader is in the hospital (obviously), several mentions of food and eating, medication mention, that should be it

Characters: Midoriya, Bakugou, Todoroki, Amajiki

A/N:

Wow, I actually completed a request in a timely fashion 😳

I hope this isn’t too terrible. My dad was disabled, so he had a lot of surgeries (maybe one every year or two). Ergo, I’ve had some experience being in hospitals, if not exactly in the position of the patient ヽ(；▽；)ノ It’s been some time tho, so idk, I might still be missing something.

Anyway, I hope you get well soon, @ure-a-sunflower! Thanks for the request, I’m really flattered that you think of me like this 😊 And never feel shy about sending me a hug! I love hugs :3

Enjoy!

-Sugar

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Midoriya:

● Midoriya is the type of guy who'll sit in the waiting room the entire time you're under

● He's a little worried about you, but he trusts that you'll make it through okay

● Trust me, he has plenty of experience being in hospitals (stop breaking ur bones >:()

● He'll be right at your bedside as soon as he's allowed to, whether you're awake or not

● As soon as you're awake and he's able to, he'll give you a nice hug (gently). He doesn't care if you're still in bed, he just wants to know you're okay

● He'll spend a lot of time with you while you recover, sitting in the chair by your bed

● Please please tell this boy it's okay for him to talk. He'll tell you everything he knows about heroes for hours and whether you care about what he's saying or not, it's totally worth it just to see the big smile on his face

● Either way, he'll talk to you almost the whole time. He's actually really fun to have a conversation with! You can talk to him about anything and he'll listen

● Will also play board games with you to pass the time, or any kind of small game he can find that you can both do on your bedside table

● He'll get you anything else you might want as well :)

● Once you're discharged, he'll stick around and help you out

● Again, if you need anything, he's got you

● Need someone to cook for you? If he can't do it himself, he'll ask his mom for help (pls, she cooks the best meals and she loves you so much)

● Will remind you to take your meds

● He'll take naps with you 🥺 He knows you're probably still tired out, so he's making sure you get plenty of rest

● Helps you with any wound care you might need, whether it's cleaning it or dressing it, he'll help out if you let him

● Just very much a sweet boi, 10/10 boyfriend

____________

Bakugou:

● He is very much concerned about you the whole time, he's just really good at hiding it

● As soon as he's allowed to visit you, he's there

● He'll come in quietly, scowling at the floor

● He has a bag with him that's got a container of food in it. He put a lot of effort into making it just for you, just the way you like, but it's likely he'll brush it off and claim it's leftovers

● Katsuki isn't exactly the best hospital buddy, but he'll try

● The thing is, he's not very talkative. He refuses to leave your room for too long, but he's more the type to just sit in the chair by the window (probably looking at his phone)

● You may think he's not paying you any attention, but he's spending time reading up on what condition you're in and how to make sure you recover properly

● He's there if you need him

●Will yell at the nurse / doctor if they're not taking care of you right

● Makes a comment at least once about how much he hates the smell (it's not you, it's the general hospital smell)

● Tries his best to cook for you as often as he can so you don't have to eat the hospital food there (might even give up trying to brush off how much he does for you)

● Gets you anything you need when you ask. As I said, he's not keen on leaving you in your room by yourself, but he won't say anything if you ask for something

● When it's time for you to go home, he'll just get even more clingy

● But not necessarily affectionate, oh no

● He was there when the doctor gave you guidelines for what to do during your recovery period, and he did his research

● You're not getting out of following it to the letter

● If you're supposed to stay in bed and rest, he'll make sure you're not getting up unless you absolutely have to. Also he'll do any kind of heavy lifting for you, just to be safe (and it’s totally not a bonus chance to lowkey show off how strong he is)

● If you need to incorporate more activity into your day, he'll be at your side. It's like a little date, taking a nice slow walk in the park

● He's also keeping tabs on how much water you're drinking. He always encourages you to drink plenty of water, but now he's even more on top of his game to remind you

● He'll also remind you to take your meds (aggressively but with love) :)

● And he'll drive you to your follow up visits with your doctor

● Bakugou will encourage you the best way he knows. He may come off harsh at times, but he just wants your healing process to go as smoothly as possible. He's not good with feelings and stuff, but this is how he shows you he cares

____________

Todoroki:

● Another sweet boi

● He knows what it's like to visit people in the hospital (ahem, his mom), so it wouldn't be too weird for him (not that it’s all that weird for any of them)

● He'd come and see you every day, and he'll bring you a little something each time, whether it's a snack, some flowers, a game or coloring book he thought you'd like, or even a little stuffed bear (or whatever your favorite animal is)

● His visits can be weirdly short though? Like, he doesn't know what to say, so he kind of just . . . leaves? Like wait come back

● He likes it when he can get you talking. He's not much of a talker himself, so it's easier if you can lead conversations

● But if you want him to, he will just keep you company in silence

● Master at staring off into space for long periods of time

● But every time he looks over at you, he gets this soft smile on his face and he's so cute

● He's trying his best

● He'll also help remind you of things when you're back home

● He's not the best at cooking, so he'll order you anything you want and eat it with you

● I'll state the obligatory "he provides that hot/cold treatment for any pain you might have" because he does and it works

● He'll go out with you to walk around, and just generally get you back into living your life

● Yeah, he's just really glad to see that you're healthy and he’s happy to help you out so your recovery is quick and easy

____________

Amajiki:

● Not gonna lie, he was a little nervous while you were having the surgery

● Not too bad, just some pacing around the waiting room, but he feels so much better once everything's over with

● Big on sitting next to your hospital bed and just holding your hand the whole time he's visiting

● Hates checking in every day (because ew, people, and also ew, walking through strange halls full of people and equipment and the lighting is funky and everything smells like hand sanitizer and—)

● But he does it for you, because you're the most important thing to him 🥺

● Oh, and he also gets really really quiet whenever the nurse comes in to check up on you and just kind of pretends like he doesn't exist for a moment while they do their thing

● He'll do something where he gets himself a boxed lunch or takeout and eat with you in your room at meal times

● Honestly though, he'll be happy when you're finally able to go back home

● He's a very sweet and doting boyfriend, and he'll make sure you're getting everything you need

● He'll do his best to help you readjust after everything, and he'll even stay by your side when you go for follow up appointments :]

● (His anxiety has that loophole where if you're ever anxious about doing something, he's able to take charge and help you out)

● Pls, I love him

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Taglist: @aahilovetheatre @basicalyrandom @hyunmin-1404 @kqtsukii @nabo39 @pyrofanatic @rainy-skys-and-bright-stars​ @sendhelpimstupid​ @xoxopam4​

[madfantasy]

I haven't seen you post in a while, I hope you've been doing okay? How is everything? Hope it's been a good year so far for you 💕💕

You're too kind, u & everyone who made inquiries, bless ur hearts.. im sorry for disappearing, but yeah, I don't have net— using my phone credit and hope this posts..

I tried to record my voice answering this, like I sometimes did on tik, suddenly ended up trying to muffle the floods of my burning tears, so now I have an awkward vid of me talking then weeping out of nowhere, which a good reason for me to keep up the no cry habit, heh.. but seriously, I suppose I'm fine till I be conscious of it.. its much easier for not to talk .. even tho I'm aching to be back in thy company, lonely in my foresight to catch on to the present that joins us, hand held out to reach like minded souls but shying from the fear of forgetfulness occurring..

I'm fine tho, did few new stuff, merely drowning in too muchness and nothingness as usual, this month I guess you could say I took an act of mad fury in search of any happy source because the echoing silence and the swarm of sadness nipping on my brain cells thickened, and the reasoning merged with the obscene. So instead of giving my guardians the usual of 3/4 of my earnings last month for net and groceries, I spent it all. Ya know, as it was told to me it mine to do as I please? As being prevented any chance of work if it was possible, 't was supposed to be spent on art supplies & measly delights craved for years ?

Before hand, I've been begging them to take me for months to get any clothing or whatever, be it the first time I ever see a shop, then just to drive around, then just me peaking to the outside when the front door is open, merely seeking change I suppose. They kept vaguely promising me until they refused point blank— getting tired of my nagging, then their car just stopped working till this day. Its in the workshop rn..

Anyway, befouled by despair, needing the mere basics of life and not granted, I was delighted when i found a site to buy from cheap & pretty, I pressed buy without any further considerations, or taking their permission and thrilled to be able get gifts for my siblings too. I say gifts but really they are deprived necessities too and not even much just one each cuz well, they are 5 of my babies and to start with the top of priorities; we all draw

I could already see it, they can't help themselves; heck seeped through the clenched gates of their mouths, trying desperately to poison me with undirect attempts this time, cuz I bought for my sibs they're out of the option of calling me selfish. I was upping the same trance like state of vague existence dealing with them, absorbing their insults and degrading just to make sure my shi arrives safe.

Unfortunate for me, the site chose the worst carrier in this country

I did everything in my power to make it into their convenience, by embarrassingly messaging the carrier daily, they took a week of promising to deliver and flanking so my guardians reached a heated level of threatening, waving their hands nd almost tossing shi at mE saying that they don't care if they came and if i dared to order something again they'll do this and that. Not allowing me to open the door for the delivery guy when he comes, blaming me for missing vaccination dates (they kept missing them even before)& missing going to important places(again, they just didn't go to for ages), made them loose sleep, etc etc— in turn, I seen red and regretfully blew up.

I screamed at them its literally the only time I ever did this, it BECAUSE it easier on them & I'll do what I want whatever anyway, & to stop interrupting me while I try to explain things , then they suddnly back done and be like I'm not mad at u I'm mad at the delivery ppl, that they are proud of me for being able to do all this, and such sort. I left them to cool in my room, Idk how I did it but must have slam-gripped something so hard it chipped most of my short nails & cracked one, was glad I didn't hurt my drawing hand but yeah, goofy mani

They robbed me of the joy of anticipation & the dissipation of apathy, I started to lose sleep again and my liberating dreams left me and I don't think I remember leaving bed.

But still, If not force myself to do things.. there'll be nothing for me if I don't.. at least I know im able of that

I got my guardians happy tho after another tiresome refusal, by trying out one of those Uber-eat like local apps here, since they have no car and being disabled & ill, I ordered McDonald's for the first time. Slythry behind their backs per habit, told them someone coming and they had that look again, but thankfully the guy came through and didn't steal my money, heh. For a big 1800 calories meal I suppose it was passable, the happy fam faces I got was the real treat..

Oh with that thing with the credit card stating I owe them money, waited weeks & nobody got back to us? They started taking from my guardian's account directly to pay it, saying oh we did send you warnings--- TO THE SHADOWY LINES OF THEIR POSTERIOR A.K.A NOWHERE. Thankfully the account is mostly empty nd just for random transactions, i alerted my guardians not to use it. And again, my god, another round of endless calls and promises started, and we wait again so they just don't act as if we owe them a frking 17k dollars that we don't have.. was panicking cuz I have nothing and but my guardians were weirdly comforting about it and told me not to worry

One thing good bout no net is it made me stop thinking about life in general, and stop the tiny unnoticeable prick of misery when I have no input to share, trying not to helplessly compare people just living, in inflated style or not, in media, to my isolated-most-of-my-life style and missing much of that organic "life experiences and chances", heh. At least, my situation would be favorable to me if it was ever possible for it to let me have peace, or have the simple knowledge I'm not virtually imprisoned and have never familiarised with nothing of this world but the surrounding walls.. its nice to have more time to be consumed by muse and day dreaming that flutters life through my dull being and sing chorus of inspiring means for art to flow and finds its way delicately onto my realised canvas.. but no, I continued drawing whilst sight blurred with salty droplets contradicting that happy tintin dance on tiktok I worked so long on just cuz I couldn't stop, not the tears or the mad scribbles of determined intention to visualise the mourned excitement I need, hating everything I make

Somehow the lilac dream still intrudes, visualising me friends, living, in a quaint home, maybe we roommate, arm in arm we go to make every fracture of fate's encounters a disgusting adventurous thrill, like building a maze of cardboard or chasing each other in the dark.. maybe getting that half bleached head and endless ear pericings ... then it dies and I totally forget it..

But what those awesome headphones helped me do, literally blocks all their voices listening to Sev losing it and I can Waltz around not feeling gutted to go and interfere or play the referee each time. But I can't wear them forever, gives me a bad headache, and honestly; I can't be too neglectful.. my sibs hates me for it already hehe

At least these clothing came true to their measurements, felt the new sensations on how everything I wore hugs me & learnt the baffling ways on how "gender" and region plays different tunes on the same measurements. Getting fitting things felt like suddenly there's hope to be, for myself to be me, and ease this severe disassociation between who I am, and what my body is .. from how little I see myself nd consider it worthy of anything because of how long it been living like a phantom among people.. to numb this dysphoria until it be gone one day

Saddened that the only site I can't order from again if they keep using that awful carrier

...

I missed our country's 91 national day, too. They made sales everything 91 riyal so.. but knowing the sellers here, I don't think most of em went true with their offers.. Horrible news tho on the celebrations, sigh

I turned this into a dear diary, guess bothered you enough today, sorry

So thankful to yous, Idk if I can be back, but I'll remain creating, and will keep the thought alive of being tickled when sharing my creations with your viewing pleasure somehow

'till then my precious dears, take care 💛🙏

26.9.2021, 8 pm, sleeping

[writingfromkitchenator]

Cullen ~ Family Reunion

1,300 Followers Challenge!

Round 2

Masterlist

Requested by @jaxtheninja

Words: 1,503

Warnings: Female Reader, post Trespasser, slight mention of disability (loss of arm), family meeting, talks of having kids

Cullen was nervous, you could see it as the two of you rode, and you held back your giggle.  After everything that the two of you had been through, after all that you’d faced together within the Inquisition, this was what was terrifying him most.

“You don’t have to worry about me Cullen,” You said, watching as the small town came into view. “I’m sure amongst all the people I’ve met, I can handle your family.”

It was quickly clear he wasn’t listening though, muttering something under his breath as people began to come under view.

This time, you did giggle, knowing that he was caught in his own thoughts about it all, but, as it always did, your giggle finally earned his attention.  “What?”

“Relax dear,” You laughed. “Everything is going to be fine.”

Cullen’s cheeks tinged red and he quickly looked away, rubbing the back of his neck.  “Right, sorry, I guess…I still can’t believe we’re doing this.”

“It was your suggestion.”

“Yes, I know,” He nodded slowly.  “I just thought…after everything…and the Inquisition now-now disbanded, that I should-or we should…Maker’s breath what are we doing?”

“Doing something long overdue, I think.”  You said, smiling warmly at him.  “You’ve been telling me for a while that you have wanted to, and now that we don’t have as many responsibilities…”

Cullen let out a slow breath.  “You’re right.  I shouldn’t get ahead of myself, we haven’t even got their yet and, well…”

“Cullen,” He looked at you, relaxing a little at your smile.  “This is your family, it’s going to be fine, I promise.”

He chuckled.  “What would I do without you?”

“Where do you want me to start?”

The two of you laughed and continued on, but you still couldn’t help but notice his growing nerves, especially when Mia’s home came into view, silently reminding you both of the possible quaint and quiet life that was before you.

With a bark, Theo bounded forward, even as Cullen called after him, but it was quickly clear that the grey mabari was far more interested in the couple of children playing with their own.

At first, the two of you were worried that the majority would attack each other, but in usual mabari style, they showed just how smart they were, soon playing away with happy yips and barks while the children laughed and watched on.

Cullen chuckled as he helped you from your horse, seeing Mia come outside to see what the commotion is. "It seems Theo has announced our arrival for us.”

Mia comes over with a wide smile, quickly pulling him into a tight hug.  "I should've known that you wouldn't just knock on my door.  How are you little brother?”

You stood back a little awkwardly, not wanting to intrude on this small family moment, knowing how much Cullen, despite his nerves, had been looking forward to this.  He had been missing his family for a long time.

Cullen soon took your hand though and pulled you forward, his arm wrapping comfortingly around your waist. "And this is Y/N."

"It's lovely to finally meet you,” You said with an abashed smile.  "Cullen's talked about you all for a long time now,"

Mia smiled, which put you at ease.  "Likewise, although talk of your life is far more interesting than ours, not to mention all the rumours as well.  I'm glad I can finally put a face to it all, especially when my brother is very much in love with you.”

You giggled, even as Cullen groaned at your side.  "Mia..."

She chuckled and led the way inside.  "Come on then, lunch will be ready soon.  No doubt Branson and Rosalie will arrive just in time, as usual."

Cullen cast you a smile and guided the way.  As he and Mia caught up, you couldn’t help but look around her home.  Every item and every room just made it all feel so real, speaking of comfort and joy within the wells.  You were glad that, for all the bad that had happened, homes and families like this were still thriving and surviving.

The kitchen was warm and cosy, you and Cullen taking a seat as Mia returned to the stove.  You felt bad, wanting to help, but Cullen kept his hand reassuringly on your knee.

He knew too well what you were like by now, and while he still wanted the comfort of having you by his side, he also wanted you to take things easy.  You were still adjusting to having lost your arm after all.  More than once he'd caught you trying to do things that were no longer as easy with only one arm, and he always hurried in to help, as well as work it out with you on whether there was another way of doing it.

Voices filled the home and Branson and Rosalie greeted you both warmly.  The more everyone talked, the more at ease the both of you felt.  For now, you were both relieved that none of them were asking about the Inquisition, although you knew they must have a lot to ask about it.

Soon, the table was set and the children were called in, lots of noise quickly filling the space. Laughter rang in the walls, and neither you nor Cullen could stop smiling.

“I have to say, we were getting worried we’d never get to see you at all Cullen,” Rosalie said, smiling. “Mia even worried that you were avoiding us.”

Cullen gave a small chuckle, but you could see the slight awkwardness in his gaze.  “It’s not that I haven’t wanted to see you all, but things have been…exceptionally busy.  Even after we got most things sorted and settled down, there wasn’t a lot time to just rest and get things done.”

“Did you really get to fight a dragon?”  One of the children piped up.

“Err,” Cullen glanced at you, even as you chuckled.  “Well, not-not-”

“Multiple,” You said, eyes sparkling with mischief.  “Maybe I can tell you all about it later?”

All the children’s eyes went wide and they stared at you before all starting to talk at once.

“After you’ve finished your meal!”  Mia said loudly over the top of them.  “And don’t think about giving any to the dogs to finish them quickly.”

You chuckled.  “Yes, please don’t feed Theo from the table, we’ve just got him out of that habit.”

“Let me guess, Cullen instigated that?”  Branson asked, grinning.

Cullen started trying to protest, but your giggle stopped him, his face flushing, a round of laughter filling the table.

“Even after all these years, he still hasn’t changed.”  Rosalie giggled.  “You can’t deny it Cullen, Mother and Father used to always tell us about the trouble you’d get up to.”

He sighed, but smiled. “Well, I’m sure there’s more than a few quirks you’ve kept over the years.  Where did you want to start Mia?”

There was more laughter, it not really settling until most of the food was gone and the children were starting to get restless, clearly wanting to know more about dragons, all of them constantly eyeing you expectantly.

“Well, I suppose I better go and tell this story before some children bounce out of their seats.”  You grinned.  “Is there a good spot for everyone to sit?”

Mia directs you to the living room, where they can all sit comfortably around the fire, and you kiss Cullen’s cheek before following after the excited rabble, chuckling after them, Theo following at your heels.

Laughing away, Mia's attention turned back to Cullen.

“So," She said with a smile.  “Where’s the pitter patter of little feet?”

Cullen flushed.  "What?"

"Come on little brother,” Mia nudged him.  "The two have been together for some time now, and are very clearly in love.”

"I...well, of course we are." Cullen frowned though, looking at the door where you'd left.  "But I'd never ask that of her.  After all she's been through...” He shook his head.  "One day, maybe, but for now, everything is still far too fresh. Especially...especially...”

"I was only stirring Cullen,” Mia said gently. "I'm sorry to have upset you. It wasn't my intention."

“She’s handling that wound well," Branson said. "Doesn't let it slow her down at all.”

Cullen sighed.  "No, it doesn't.  I wish she would take it easier at times but... " He smiled affectionately.  "I don't think it's part of her nature."

"The two of you can stay you know," Mia said gently. " As long as you need too.  You both look like you could use a break."

"Thank you Mia," Cullen said.  "I...I'm glad my long silence hasn't...well...”

"Oh, don't think I'm going to let you off for that easily."  Mia said, making the other two laugh.  "You've got a lot of making up to do mister.”

Cullen just chuckled and nodded, feeling himself finally fully relax, your laughter echoing down the hall on what he hoped was a promise for much more peaceful days to come.

[willowandfog]

TAKING FLIGHT

Complete

Summary: Kagome has been struggling with her disability most of her life but she's never felt anything but normal with Inuyasha always steadily by her side. But when her neurologist approaches her with the chance to recover full use of her leg, she takes it.

A childhood friends to lovers, soulmates AU

Read on AO3 or Below the Cut

Inuyasha was already awake and drinking a cup of strong black coffee when his father arrived. Touga chuckled at the sight of Kouga sleeping on the floor, curled into a ball with his tail wrapped around his waist. Miroku was still obviously unconscious on the couch, lying face down, with mouth open and drool slowly pooling below. 

“You boys had a nice evening then I take it?” Touga asked him as he poured himself some coffee into a mug.

Inuyasha laughed slightly. “Sure. You could say that. We all got drunk, well Miroku got absolutely pissed, and then Kouga tried to fight me.”

Touga raised a brow at that. “For the fun of it or for a specific reason?”

“Cause he still wants Kagome. Told me that if he could beat me that he would be the one to marry Kagome today.”

“I take it that went...well? The furniture all seems to be intact.”

“Oh I was all for the fight, then I just said no and went to bed.” Inuyasha set his now empty mug in the sink before heading back to the living room. “I’m sober and my hangover is almost gone so I imagine Kouga is fine and just sleeping in, lazy bastard. Miroku will be feeling like crap if he’s even sober by now.”

Inuyasha knelt by the couch and gave Miroku a shake. “Miroku, buddy.” Inuyasha shook him again when there was no response. “Miroku, time to wake up.”

Miroku groaned, rolling onto his back “Go way.” He muttered.

“Well you can wake up now and have some coffee and we can hit a drive thru for some greasy food for you and you can still stand by me today as my best man or I’ll ask my dad to stand in your stead. Which would you prefer?”

Miroku’s eyes fluttered open. “There was no option in there for you to kill me so I’m on the fence.”

Inuyasha rolled his eyes, rising. “Kouga. Wake up, either come with us or go home. You’re not staying here.”

Kouga flipped Inuyasha the bird from his place on the floor, but still opened his eyes and ran a hand over his face. Groaning, he sat up. With a heavy sigh he stood before making his way towards the bathroom. “I’m coming, wouldn’t want to disappoint Kagome by not having her favorite youkai in attendance.”

Inuyasha let out a warning growl just before Kouga slammed the door closed. 

“You guys aren’t friends right?” Touga questioned as he handed a fresh mug of coffee over to the now sitting Miroku.

“Nope, I put up with his existence because Kagome has a soft spot for sad lonely wolves.”

“I heard that!” Kouga yelled through the door just before the sound of the toilet flushing came through. 

“Good.” Inuyasha called to him. “I’m gonna go grab some socks and mine and Kagome’s luggage. We can head out after Miroku finishes his coffee.”

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Inuyasha sat in the passenger seat, munching on a hashbrown as his father drove and Miroku and Kouga sat in the back, both chowing down on breakfast sandwiches from the drive thru. 

“Did you have to go home first?” Inuyasha asked his father as he sipped coffee from his paper cup. 

“No, we are stopping by the Higurashi’s; Kagome left her overnight bag there and your mother texted me and asked me to grab something she left there as well.”

Inuyasha nodded, looking out the window and watching the scenery pass by. He thought that he would be feeling nervous by now but found that he was more antsy and anticipatory for the whole event to begin. 

When the car pulled into the short drive and came to a stop, both Inuyasha and Touga climbed out and made their way to the house. Inuyasha used his key to let them inside, he proceeded towards Kagome’s old room while his father went towards the kitchen. He immediately noticed Kagome’s bag, resting on the computer chair in front of the desk. He glanced around the room and peeked into the bathroom to make sure she hadn’t left anything else lying about. After snagging her hairbrush off the bathroom counter and tossing it into her bag, he noticed that one of his shirts was tucked underneath her favorite pajama bottoms. 

Inuyasha pulled the shirt free, bringing it to his nose he inhaled deeply, the sweet scent of Kagome was strong on the fabric but there was a hint of his own as well. The combination of the two scents had Inuyasha’s youkai ‘purring’ as Kagome liked to put it. Upon the realization that she must have worn it to bed during their night apart, he clutched the shirt to his chest and bowed his head over it. While he wished that she didn’t have to deal with having such a hard time being apart, Inuyasha was slightly ashamed to admit that he was also glad that he wasn’t alone in the feelings. Bringing the shirt back to his nose he took one final whiff before tucking the shirt back into the bag and zipping it closed. 

Bag slung over his shoulder, he met his father by the front door.

“Dad, can I ask you something?”

“You know you can.”

“How did you and mom do this? Stay a night apart, I mean. I feel it shouldn’t be this...difficult to sleep away from Kagome for one night. I mean, we are apart for a majority of the day during work.”

“Well, mainly, your mother and I were already bonded before we got married, so that helped. It still wasn’t easy, trying to sleep when your mate isn’t there is extremely challenging. Being full youkai, I don’t think I could’ve handled sleeping apart at your mother’s request if we hadn’t been bonded already. But you made it through and it should get easier here soon, just knowing your mate is in the same vicinity as you, surrounded by family. And just keep in mind that by this time tomorrow you will be a husband, mate, and soul bonded, and your mother and I couldn’t be more proud.” Touga clasped Inuyasha tightly on the shoulder, squeezing lightly in affection. 

Inuyasha gave an almost shy smile. “Thanks dad.”

The pair shared a brief tight hug before heading out. 

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Inuyasha finished buttoning up his dress shirt before reaching for the cufflinks that his father had worn on his wedding day. He turned as he slipped the first one into place, taking in the sight of Miroku sitting on the sofa in the ‘man cave’ as the venue called it. He was nursing another bottle of water, head resting on his open palm.

“So, care to tell me what all the excessive drinking was about last night?”

Miroku rotated his head slightly in the semblance of a head shake. “I… had a date with Sango last week and I fucked it up.”

“How did you manage to fuck it up, haven’t you two been going on dates for months? Haven’t you already had sex?”

“Yes. I did something really stupid, panicked and ran out of there; leaving her with the bill and all alone in the middle of the restaurant. And I haven’t responded to any of her calls or texts and I just don’t want to face her today.”

“What did you do?” Inuyasha chuckled, straightening his sleeves after pinning the second cufflink into place.

“Don’t want to talk about it.”

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. “I’m sure it’ll be ok, you guys have been doing this dance since junior year. Off and on, someone always says something to screw things up, you guys fight or don’t speak. Then one of you apologizes to the other, or you guys get drunk and make up.”

As Miroku opened his mouth to reply, the door to the room creaked open, and Izayoi’s bright smiling face appeared. 

“How’s it coming in here, boys?”

“We’re great, mom. You can come in.”

She slipped into the room, letting the door snik shut behind her. Her eyes quickly took in the room, scanning everything before settling on Miroku. 

Inuyasha looked over his mother as she studied Miroku for a moment. She wore a floor length midnight blue sheath dress that Inuyasha knew perfectly matched the markings that graced his father’s cheeks. The bodice had a layer of flowery lace in the same shade, cinched at the waist before flowing to the floor in a shimmer of satin. 

“Miroku, dear. Would you mind helping Touga outside for a few minutes, please?”

Miroku’s brows met his hairline for a moment as he looked back and forth between Inuyasha and Izayoi. 

“Ummm, yeah, sure.”

“Thank you, dear.” Izayoi gave him a sweet smile as she watched him go. 

Inuyasha turned back to the floor length mirror, picking up his pale golden tie from the side table. Looping it around his neck, he watched his movements in the mirror as he began tying the Windsor knot. He was halfway finished when his large hands were cupped by smaller delicate ones. 

Izayoi took the tie into her hands and resumed Inuyasha’s work as his hands dropped to his sides. 

“Kagome looks lovely.”

Inuyasha gave her one of his rare genuine smiles. “She’s always lovely.”

“Transcendent then.” Izayoi stuck her tongue out at him before giggling and folding down his collar, adjusting his tie into place. 

Izayoi stretched up to her toes and placed a kiss on his cheek. Dropping back onto her heels she made her way over and sat on the sofa Miroku had vacated. Waving him over she pointed to the floor in front of her. 

“Sit.”

Inuyasha stopped in front of her. “Sit on the floor? But I’ll wrinkle my pants.”

She rolled her eyes and smiled. “They’ll be fine for a few minutes, sit please.”

He sat on the floor between her legs, crossing his legs and instantly relaxing. He had always found sitting on the ground, comforting.

Izayoi picked up the hairbrush that was resting on the side table and began to brush Inuyasha’s hair in gentle, slow strokes. 

“I remember,” she said softly, “doing this when you were a little boy. You were always so excited for it. You’d come running to me with the brush and you would instantly climb into my lap when I would sit down. Oh, how it used to lull you to sleep, you would slowly start to slump over more and more until you fell asleep right there in my arms. I would just rock you in your sleep until your father came and scooped you up and carried you to bed.”

Inuyasha smiled fondly at the memory, eyes drifting closed as the sense of peace came over him. “You used to hum too.” He murmured.

She hummed her acknowledgement before beginning to hum a soft lullaby under her breath. When the song was finished she leaned forward and planted a kiss to the back of his head, setting the brush down on the cushion beside her. 

“I love you, mom.”

She ran her fingers through his hair. “I love you too. You know, you have been and always will be my little boy; but you’ve belonged to Kagome just as long. Your father and I are so happy that this day is here and we are so proud of the man you’ve become. You’ve always done whatever you can to take care of and provide for Kagome, and those are amazing things to receive from a mate.” She kissed him again before rising.

Inuyasha stood and turned towards her, quickly moving to wipe her cheeks when he spotted the dampness there. 

Izayoi smiled tenderly at him. “Today is a joyous day. One of the happiest days of my life was marrying your father, tied with the actual mating, and having you of course.” She lovingly stroked his cheek. “Now. Let’s get you in your jacket and outside.”

Inuyasha nodded slightly as he pulled her into his arms, tucking her under his chin and holding her tightly. He held her for several long moments before he released her.

“Ok. I’m ready, let’s do this.”

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Kagome had been pampered, massaged, prodded and poked all morning and she was ready to be done. While the beginnings of the day had felt great, she was ready for the hair pulling, fidgeting, pins poking her head, and the fussing to be over with. All she wanted was to walk down the aisle and tell Inuyasha how much he meant to her and then be whisked away as husband and wife and spend the night in his arms. 

She missed him something fierce, and she felt like she was starting to itch under her skin. She couldn’t quite figure out if that was the bond making her extra antsy and on edge being away from him or if it was just in her head. She could only imagine how Inuyasha was feeling about the separation since he had always felt the effects of the bond much more strongly than she had.

“Your hair turned out so beautifully.” Her mother stood directly behind her, stroking a gentle hand across her shoulder.

Kagome noticed Sango, her friend since freshman year of college, and Ayame, her good friend she was a new start with at work, standing behind her mother in the mirror she was sitting in front of, both nodding their agreement. She hoped to introduce Ayame and Kouga later at the reception, she had a feeling that they would get along and she hoped that they would hit it off pretty well. She had always felt a little guilty that Kouga still carried a torch for her even after finding out that she was Inuyasha’s mate. 

Turning her attention back to the mirror, she turned her head back and forth, taking in her seemingly simpler hairstyle that had cost more than she had been willing to pay. A relaxed french braid started at either temple, forming a crown of sorts around her head and met together in the back to form a low messy bun. Loose tendrils fell from her bun and more were deliberately left out framing her face with slightly wavy strands. A simple gold leaf and pearl hair vine comb was pinned up against the side of her bun. She really did love it but still felt that the style could’ve been achieved without paying the amount that they had but her mothers had insisted that a wedding day was a day to splurge for the finer things, like having someone else to do your hair and makeup. Kagome was happy to have talked them out of insisting that she hire a makeup artist as well, pleading with them that her friends had asked and wanted to participate by being the ones to do her makeup. They had done a great job, her skin looked smooth, and she was shining in all the right places, her eye makeup was noticeable with the winged eyeliner and the shimmering gold shadow but it was all light enough to still look closer to a natural style. 

“Alright, let’s get you into your dress.” Izayoi came over carrying a shoe box that she set on the vanity.

Twenty minutes and eight overly helpful hands later, Kagome was finally tucked into her dress. Izayoi and Sango guided her over to her chair and helped her sit, rucking up her dress as her mother and Ayame knelt on the floor, each bearing a shoe. 

“Guys.” Kagome protested. “I can put my own shoes on.”

“Don’t be silly, darling.” Izayoi spoke by her side. “It’s hard to reach your own feet in a wedding dress, besides we enjoy helping.”

Kagome held back any further comments as each of her feet were worked into her crochet lace pointy toed flats with a sheer organza lace up ribbon. Although she was able to walk without her crutch now and almost always had a smooth gait when she walked, she wasn’t able to get much practice in with heels and had decided that it would be safer to wear flat shoes. But that hadn’t stopped her from taking Sango and trying to find the prettiest flats she could, and she thought the ballerina lace up shoes were to die for. After they finished criss-crossing and wrapping the ribbon around her leg and tying it into a neat little bow at the back of her calf, both Ayame and her mother stood. 

“There.” Her mother beamed. “Now, let me grab my phone before you get your first look in the mirror.”

All four of her helpers reached for their phones at once. There were no blinding flashes throughout the day so far, no intruding presence, the photographer they had hired had been snapping photos throughout the process, occasionally disappearing to where Kagome could only guess was the ‘man cave’ where the boys were getting ready. Even though the photographer, Lacy, Kagome thought her name was, had been amazingly silent and unobtrusive, everyone else was still insistent on taking photos on their phones. 

Kagome had been avoiding her own phone for most of the day, fighting the urge to text Inuyasha. But she came to the conclusion that having some hand taken photos and selfies of her wedding day would be a nice addition as well. Rising, she made her way to the vanity, careful not to look into the mirror. Pulling her phone out of her bag, she opened up the camera and turned to snap a few photos of everyone else digging their phones out of their bags, except Sango who was explaining some app she had to Kagome’s mother. 

“Ready? Will someone take some photos with my phone too?” Kagome unlocked her screen, her lip quivering slightly at the sight of Inuyasha’s grinning face gracing her wallpaper. 

“Yeah I got it, Kagome.” Ayame said as she came up beside her and gently took the phone from her hands, patting her softly on the shoulder. “You’ll see him soon, he’s fine and you’re doing great.”

“Thanks.” Kagome murmured as she sniffled before turning away. 

Shaking herself out of her momentary lapse she slowly made her way over to the floor length mirror in the corner. She gasped when she saw herself. She had loved the dress when she saw it in the catalog but she was amazed that it looked as great as it had before. Knowing she was being ridiculous since she had seen herself during her fitting, this felt different, more final. 

The intricately embellished bold lace bust delicately embroidered with sequins had a deep v-shaped neckline showing off just the right amount of cleavage. The bust flowed into a voluminous silk chiffon circle skirt, ending as it graced the floor. Turning slightly she caught sight of the low open back that ended with a small silken bow. Smiling, she turned to face the mirror again, reaching up to finger the delicate hand-beaded shoulder detailing with strings of thin spider-silk-like beaded strands dangling off her shoulder in drooping half circles. 

Kagome was vaguely aware of exclaimed praises and comments about capturing good photos but it was all background noise. She shook herself from her daze and turned back to face the group, the sooner she was done fawning over herself the sooner she could walk down the aisle. They snapped a few more photos before taking turns taking selfies with her then gathering for group photos. They asked the photographer to also take photos with all their phones of the small group of women. 

Kagome’s mother pulled her aside and hugged her, stroking a tender hand across her shoulder.

“I wish your father was here to see how beautiful and happy you are. I know he’d be so proud of the woman you’ve become.”

Tears filled Kagome’s eyes, her gut clenching as it always did when she remembered the accident that took her father from her. 

“Thanks mom, I love you.”

“I love you too, sweetheart.” She pulled her into another brief tight hug as Izayoi stepped up beside them.

“I’m going to go check on the boys and make sure Inuyasha is ready and get him out there. Take a few minutes to yourself, your mother and Sango will wait for you outside the door.”

Kagome nodded, giving her soon to be mother in law a hug. As the door closed behind the group Kagome let out a sigh of relief at finally being alone for the first time that day. She gathered up the couple items of hers that were strewn about the room and piled them into her bag; sneaking at glance at Inuyasha’s photo on her phone before tucking that too away and zipping the bag closed. Her mother had mentioned coming back to the room after the ceremony to grab her bag for her so Kagome wanted to make it as easy as possible on her.

Walking over to the vanity she sat, taking a few calming breaths. When she stood again she felt her weak leg give a little tremble. Sighing, she went back to her bag and extracted her brace. Sitting down she hastily pulled her skirt up and with difficulty managed to get her shoed foot through the brace and pulled up into place. After a stern glare at the brace, she stood, smoothing her skirt back into place. She gave one last glance into the floor length mirror before making her way to the door. 

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Inuyasha escorted his mother down the aisle, a symbol to their guests that it was time to find their seats as the ceremony would be beginning shortly. Kagome and Inuyasha had opted to not have a long drawn out intro to the ceremony, not wanting to wait what would feel like forever as bridesmaids and groomsmen walked down the aisle. So Sango and Miroku were already in place at the end of the aisle, standing to either side, ready to support and be witness to the union of their friends. In truth, Inuyasha hadn’t wanted anything to draw attention away from Kagome being presented and walking down the aisle.

Inuyasha studied the trees that they had picked to get married under. They were beautiful, far reaching weeping willows, standing slightly apart. Leaving the perfect amount of space for the couple to stand together in front of everyone and declare their love for each other. Kagome and both of their mothers had come out the day before and helped the venue string up fairy lights all along the tree branches. Allowing some to hang down from the branches towards the ground. The effect was almost magical as the sun began to set and the light a little lower, drawing more attention to the lit tree. 

As Inuyasha reached the end of the aisle with his mother he stopped. Izayoi withdrew her arm from his before stretching up and placing a kiss on his cheek. She gave him a tender smile before moving to take the empty seat beside his father.

Moving to take his place beside Miroku, Inuyasha clasped his hands tightly together in front of him. His nerves spiked as his senses were suddenly overwhelmed, finally feeling Kagome’s presence nearby again.

Oh, how he had missed it, the feel of her gentle, loving presence brushing up against his. Her smiling face, her love filled eyes as she looked at him with adoration. He was hard pressed to believe that they had only spent a night apart, it felt like it had been days, weeks, years even. His yearning for her had grown so strong that when she stepped out from the tent flap beside her mother all breath and coherent thought left him. 

She was the most divine creature he had ever laid eyes on. He glanced over her. Yes, the dress was beautiful and her hair was nice but he was more interested in her face. The brightness in her face and the smile that showed her absolute happiness of the moment. It spread to him, her joy, and he felt it reach him deep down into his soul, soothing his youkai.

He noticed the tightening of her hand wrapped around her bouquet, the catch in her breath and the speed of her already rapidly beating heart kick up a notch when she glanced up and met his eye. Hers a warm chocolate from a distance but he knew them intimately. Knew that they held many shades, shades of whiskey and a crystallized honey. Eyes focus solely on him, the bright gleam in her eyes only for him. Eyes that saw everything of him, that pierced through any gruffiness he might have had at the world and saw straight through to him. 

When Kagome and her mother reached him, he stepped forward, placing a kiss on her mother’s cheek before taking Kagome’s hand and leading her the rest of the way to the front. As they stopped in front of Totosai, his father’s long time friend, they turned to face each other. Kagome, still smiling and Inuyasha suspected that he had a goofy grin planted on his face. 

Totosai spoke a few words of welcome to their guests, speaking the meaning of marriage and how happy he was that Kagome and Inuyasha were coming together; but Inuyasha didn’t hear the words, all his attention on Kagome. Inuyasha’s mind finally registered the words that were being spoken when Totosai spoke again.

“Kagome and Inuyasha have asked to incorporate a handfasting into their ceremony. And have asked that Inuyasha’s father, Touga, step forward and honor them in officiating the ritual.”

Inuyasha’s attention was drawn away from Kagome for the first time since she had appeared from underneath the tent to walk down the aisle. He glanced over at his father, who was rising from his seat amongst the front row, surprise clearly written on his face as he straightened his coat. Kagome and himself had decided not to mention including the handfasting into their ceremony to anyone other than Totosai, wanting it to be a surprise and a gift for his father. 

Handfasting was an old tradition, something developed not from their heritage but was adopted early on in youkai society as an additional symbol of a soul bonded match. It was considered a great honor among youkai to be chosen by a bonded couple to perform the ritual. 

As Touga walked around the couple, Totosai pulled him aside. They talked in hushed murmurs for a few moments before separating and Totosai stepped off to the side, standing near Miroku, with a smile on his face. Touga took his place behind the couple, facing them and the gathering, holding three satin cords in one clawed hand. 

Though he had to clear his throat before beginning, Touga spoke loudly and clearly. “Though not originating from the youkai, handfasting was quickly developed into mating and marriage ceremonies as a perfect outward display of a soul bond. It is considered extremely fortuitous and rare to find your soulmate as well as a blessing to witness the joining. I am beyond honored to stand before you all as I guide my son and my new daughter into their union.”

Turning his attention back to the couple, Touga spoke to them. “If you would join right hands, please.”

Kagome turned, handing off her bouquet to Sango before turning back to Inuyasha and offering up her right hand. Inuyasha gently clasped it with his own, his eyes roving her face, taking in every detail.

“With full awareness, know that before this gathering of witnesses you are not only declaring your intent to be bound before your friends and family, but also by joining hands you are representing your willingness in the union, if one of you is unwilling to be bound to the other, please now lower your hand.”

Inuyasha and Kagome both held on tighter, staring into each other’s eyes as they spoke together. “We are both aware and willing.”

Inuyasha turned his attention to their clasped hands as Touga laid one of the satin cords, in a vibrant shade of forest green, across Inuyasha’s wrist. “This cord represents Kagome’s commitment and acceptance of Inuyasha in the union. Kagome, would you like to say a few words to Inuyasha?” 

Kagome glanced at Touga, nodding slightly before turning and looking into the pools of melted honey that were Inuyasha’s eyes. “Inuyasha, we’ve been best friends for twenty-one years and you’ve been the love of my life for a dozen of those. That night when we were eight and you convinced me to sneak out of my house to watch the meteor storm with you, we both made a wish. And I think it’s finally time to share my wish with you; I wished for us to be able to stay together forever. My wish is coming true and that makes me the happiest-” The emotions clogged her throat and she covered her mouth with her free hand for a moment as she took a ragged breath. When Inuyasha squeezed her hand in support and encouragement she cleared her throat and looked back up to him with tear filled eyes. “The happiest person in the world. Inuyasha, I promise to always love and respect you. To support you and cherish you. And I promise to try to be everything to you that you have always been to me.”

Kagome looked to the side as Sango stepped up beside her, offering up Inuyasha’s ring on the palm of her hand. It hadn’t been hard to figure out a way to mix the traditional handfasting with the modern wedding ceremony. Taking the ring in her left hand, she turned back to Inuyasha as he offered his left to her underneath their clasped hands. As she slid the cool platinum band onto his finger he kept his gaze on her face, and when her watery eyes flicked back up and meet his, he mouthed ‘I love you,’ and she beamed, the motion spilling her tears out of the corners of her eyes to track down her cheeks. 

Touga laid the crimson satin cord across Kagome’s wrist. “This cord represents Inuyasha’s commitment and acceptance of Kagome in the union. Inuyasha, a few words?”

Inuyasha took in a deep breath, he had written vows but they seemed a cheap imitation to what he knew his heart wanted to say. The breath he had been holding came out shakily as he slowly released it. He had so much he wanted to say and he was afraid he’d say it wrong. She had said such wonderful things that caused a warmth to bloom in his chest and he was the one that always fumbled for the right thing to say when it mattered most. 

But he knew. He knew. 

That no matter what he said in this moment, Kagome would know. She would know what he was trying to say, what he wanted to convey, what was in his heart. She always knew, she always understood, she knew him better than he knew himself.

“Kagome, you have been my entire focus and ever present constant since I looked out the window twenty years ago and saw a little girl fierce in her determination to make it from the car to the house on her own. I think even then I knew, I sensed something within me reaching out to you, urging me to befriend you, protect you, love you. I’m happy with the man I’ve become and that’s all because of you; because of your gentle hand and your guiding words. The strength and kindness of your heart never ceases to amaze me. I strive to be as good to you as you have always been to me. I promise to be your guiding light in the darkness, a warming comfort in the cold, and a shoulder to lean on when life is too much to bare on your own.” 

Inuyasha looked down as a hand appeared at his side, Kagome’s delicate rose gold band lay on Miroku’s open hand. Inuyasha plucked the ring off his friend’s palm, mindful of his claws. When he turned back to Kagome she had more tears on her cheeks but her smile was dazzling, warm, accepting, and happy. Her offered left hand was already waiting for him, as he slid the ring onto her finger, he felt the youkai within him sturing. The need to throw her over his shoulder and carry her away from prying eyes and finally claim her as his mate washed through him with such force that he had a hard time resisting. But when his father began speaking again, he tried to tamp down even harder on the urge, knowing that later that night, Kagome would be his in every way possible. 

“This cord represents their union, the joining of not only Inuyasha and Kagome but of each side’s family coming together.” Touga draped the gold cord across the top of their joined hands before moving both the other cords up to rest alongside it. “Today on your wedding day, as you promise to love each other forever, you are holding the hand of your best friend. These are the hands that will work alongside yours as together you built your future.”

 He spoke as he held one side of the strands steady in one hand and began to wrap the other side around it. “These are the hands that will love you and cherish you through the years. These are the hands that will celebrate with you when you feel happy and comfort you when you feel sad.” He tucked one side under the other, pulling to form the knot on top of their clasped hands. One end of the cords dangling down on each side of their hands. “These are the hands that will give you strength and support whenever you need it. As your hands are joined together now, so your hearts will always be.”

Inuyasha and Kagome each took hold of one of the ends of cords, making sure to maintain eye contact. Slowly, they slid their clasped hands along each other’s as they separated them, pulling on the cord ends at the same time. When their hands fell free, the cords came together, forming a tight infinity knot. 

Totosai stepped up beside Touga. “By the authority vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife.”

Using the cord as leverage, Inuyasha wasted no time in yanking it, pulling Kagome towards him, wrapping his free arm around her waist and crushing her to him. Still maintaining his hold on their cord he pressed his lips to hers. He’d kissed her countless times before, but the tingle of blissful tranquility that flowed through him felt new in a way he could not describe. He moaned slightly at the feeling, deepening the kiss. Stroking his tongue across her lower lip before dipping it inside her parted lips. 

Only when he let out a low possessive growl did he remember the crowd; pulling away just enough so their lips were still touching.

“I love you.” He whispered against her lips.

“I love you, too.”

It was only then that he heard the crowd, they were all cheering and clapping, some rising from their seats. Inuyasha took Kagome’s end of the cords from her, turning and handing the knot over to his father. 

“Guard this for us till later?”

Touga nodded, accepting the duty.

With a large grin Inuyasha tucked Kagome’s arm in the crook of his elbow, beginning to lead her away from their position at the front and down the aisle. His eyes were fixed on his luminous mate even as she watched the crowd, a shy but ecstatic smile on her face. There were a few clicks and flashes of cameras going off but Inuyasha’s attention never wavered. Flower petals rained down upon them, creating a lovely effect but other than causing Inuyasha to blink more often as sone petals hit his face, he never looked away. 

When they reached the end of the aisle, he scooped Kagome up into his arms and quickly dashed off, looking for a place where they could extract a couple of quiet moments to themselves and bask in the joy they were feeling. 

@ruddcatha @superpixie42 @lavendertwilight89 @clearwillow @dawnrider @mamabearcat @fawn-eyed-girl @smmahamazing @bluejay785 @i-dream-of-soup @liz8080 @zelink-inukag @malditamigs @shinidamachu 

[ri-boo]

Shout out to those of you who’ve heard any of these and more from your parents/family members...

“I gave birth to you/I’m your parent so I automatically deserve your respect.”

“I feed you, clothe you, and house you. You don’t get to complain about anything.”

“Learn to take a joke, you’re too sensitive.”

“What is wrong with you?”

“Who do you think you are?”

“You’re exaggerating.”

“I don’t remember that happening.”

“If you don’t like my rules, then leave.”

“Who else would take in someone like you? I’m your parent so it’s here or nowhere.”

“If you want my respect, respect me. But even if you respect me, I’m not required to respect you because you’re a child.”

“It really hurts me that you’re accusing me of something so awful. Stop making things up.”

“You’re stupid.”

“You’re useless.”

“I won’t accept you if you’re trans/gay (or anything else lgbtq).

“Sometimes I wish I had an abortion. My life would be so much easier.”

“Oh... I thought you were going to show me something cool or impressive. Your art isn’t either of those.”

“Why can’t you be more like your brother?”

“I’m sorry... but, I only do this because I love you.”

“I hate you.”

“You don’t deserve (insert something simple, like new shoes) because all you do is disappoint me.”

“Your opinions and feelings don’t matter. Just do what I say.”

Hey you, yeah you reading this right now...

Your opinions and feelings do matter.

You deserve the world and more. You deserve happiness and love.

I may not know you, but I love you. I think you’re awesome! <3

Everyone is different, don’t hold yourself up to the standards or comparisons of others. You’re amazing no matter how different you are.

Are you proud of something you’ve done? I’m proud of you and what you did too.

Did you enjoy that drawing? That’s amazing!

Did you enjoy that thing you wrote or made? Awesome! I’d love to see it or read it sometime.

Did something make you smile? I’m so glad you smiled. <3

Did you want to share something? Go ahead! I’m all ears (you can comment or add it to this post if you’d like). I’d love to know what you have to share. I’ll listen.

You’re here. You matter. You being alive does not make you a burden, it makes you something amazing, something wonderful. Breathe. Stand in the sun for a bit. Listen to the rain. Dance yourself silly to some random song until you collapse in a fit of laughter. ( I suggest Get Up by Mother Mother as pick me up ;) You’re alive. And that makes me happy.

No matter who or what you are, I accept you. You’re not alone! My family doesn’t like who I am sometimes either but that’s okay because we’ve got eachother! Count me as your family if you’d like, I understand and accept all of you. :)

You’re not useless. And you don’t have to be useful either. You shouldn’t be used, period. You should just be if that’s what you want. (This ones hard for me too, sometimes I need a reminder.)

You’re not stupid. Your intelligence isn’t measured in grades or awards or what career path you take/took. Your intelligence or smarts isn’t something people can see just by looking at you. A learning disability or your neurodivergence doesn’t make you any lesser than anyone else. Your brain is amazing (even if it doesn’t feel like it sometimes.)

Sometimes people can’t or won’t accept that they hurt you. Sometimes you can’t fix that. Don’t doubt what you know and stay steady in your self trust.

Some people don’t deserve your respect. That’s okay. You’re not required to give it if you can’t or if it hurts to do so.

Need somewhere to go? There’s resources! I may not be able to take you in but there is someone who will and would. It’s scary, I know that personally. People are scary. But sometimes reaching out and getting that help could be the thing that gets you to safety. Your safety matters.

Do you remember something happening? Even if it might be a little fuzzy or clouded with emotions? I believe you. I believe you and acknowledge your experiences and pain.

You’re not exaggerating. You’re not being dramatic. You’re not overreacting. You’re being human and you’re hurt. It’s okay to show that.

Who do you think you are? Amazing I hope! But even then, even if you think you’re lesser or not enough, if you think you’re struggles make you worthless, even then, I think you’re amazing. Someday I hope you think so too!

What is wrong with you? Nothing. Nothing is wrong with you. You might just have a little glitch in the brain. A gear isn’t turning right. Or maybe you’re sad. Maybe you need a hug. Or maybe you don’t like physical contact and you just need someone to sit with? We can talk about what you think is wrong/off/different because what you think is wrong matters. Maybe we can figure a few things out or get you help. I care, and so do others. I promise.

Did that joke hurt you in some way? Say it. You’re not being sensitive. You’re feeling. And feeling is brave. Did I say something that hurt you? Tell me! I don’t want you to hurt. <3

Is something bothering you? Complain! Let it out! Write it down or scream it for the world to hear. Something stressing you out? Me too man, me too. It’s okay to complain. You’re acknowledging what bothers you and what you want for yourself. Just because someone does the bare minimum for you, doesn’t mean you can’t hope for or expect more.

Just because your parents had you, just because they’re your parents, doesn’t mean you’re required to respect them. Did they lose your respect? Did they hurt you too many times? Did they make your life a living hell or make you think your worth depends on what they think? You don’t have to keep them in your life, you’re allowed to cut off toxic family, you’re allowed to be happy.

You matter. I believe you. I accept you. You’re allowed to feel and show it. You’re allowed to be free of those who’ve hurt you. You’re allowed to be happy.

You’re not alone.

[peterparker-pickedapepper]

Always You

(Peter Parker/Spider-Man x Stark!Reader)

Chapter 01

A/N: this is set during Homecoming (and eventually FFH) in a universe where Tony isn’t ☠️ bc we don’t acknowledge that trauma here 🙂 also, there are elements from the comics and the older movies, but it’s still in the MCU

———————————————————————

I never meant to find it.

And I wasn’t being nosy either. It was my dads fault, really. Okay so yes, I wasn’t supposed to be in his workshop. But is it my fault he just leaves important things lying around? Mom’s told him to keep it tidy enough times you think it’d be engrained in his brain.

Anyway, the how isn’t important. Not even the why matters. It’s everything that came after.

It was the day my world began falling apart.

The moment I lost all trust—all respect—for the two men closest to my heart.

Now that I know their secret, I don’t see how I’ll be able to look them in the eye. But I’m going to do it. I’m going to keep my head up, act as normal as possible...

And see how long it takes for them to tell me themselves.

———————————————————————

                      Three Months Earlier

“I’m here on the corner of fifth and main, just a street away from the reported sighting of a flying man causing panic among the locals.”

Y/N adjusted her fingers around the smooth base of the microphone, her skin slipping against the hard plastic. It wasn’t nerves causing the dampness on her palms, but excitement. Her eyes flickered from the camera lens pointed in her direction to her best friend standing behind it before easily finding their mark again.

“The large, mechanically winged man has been wrecking havoc in New York’s beloved neighborhood of Queens for the last—”

The ground suddenly shifted beneath her feet with a loud boom, jolting her forward and stopping her report mid-sentence. She twirled around, eyes instantly landing on the sandwich shop across the street.

Or, rather, on the man looming ominously from its roof.

She could only assume it was a man. She’d never seen his face—or any part of his body for that matter—not that his skintight suit left anything to the imagination. But the media affectionately called him “Spider-Man”, so they pretty much filled in the blanks on that one.

She watched as he seemingly surveyed the area. It was always so hard to tell what was going on behind that mask, but every time she saw him she liked to imagine a picture perfect heroic expression etched into handsome features.

It made her disdain for the local superstar a little easier to swallow down.

His head swiveled back and forth a few times, fists clenching at his sides, before he shot one of his webs and disappeared on the other side of the building. She immediately turned back toward her camerawoman, lips pulled into an excited grin.

“This is perfect. Come on.” She wasted no time in scooping up some of the equipment laying at her feet, but stopped short when she noticed the apprehensive expression staring back at her.

“I don’t think I’m really in the mood to run toward danger today.” Her best friend’s bored voice didn’t match the concern she knew was brewing just below the surface.

“MJ,” Y/N all but whined. “We need this story.”

“We need to get ready for next week’s debate.” She muttered, mild annoyance seeping through. “We need to be home in twenty minutes so your dad doesn’t kill us. We need—”

“Okay, okay, I get it.” Y/N huffed, tossing the last of the camera supplies into her bag before slinging it over her shoulder.

She turned on her heel, pulling her phone from her back pocket as she moved toward the last crash that sounded a few blocks away. She was getting this story, whether she had to go alone or not. Screw her father’s arbitrary curfew. He was in India for the next few days, anyway.

“You’re serious?” MJ’s incredulous voice echoed from behind her. “What about Liz’s party?”

Y/N’s attention only wavered from the small screen in her hands once she was finished temporarily disabling the tracking feature her dad had not so subtly installed before giving it to her. He didn’t need to know she almost immediately figured out it was there, just like she didn’t need to know that he got a notification every time she hacked into the system.

Her eyes found MJ’s, wide with shock and following something in the sky above. Y/N’s head snapped upward, gaze locking on the flying man who was twisting and turning aggressively in an attempt to kick Spider-Man off his right wing.

“Yes. Very serious.” She huffed, pulse jumping with excitement. “If FRIDAY calls just, please, try to be convincing.”

With that, she spun around one last time before jogging toward the action. She knew MJ’s hesitation was coming from a good place. They’d been inseparable since middle school because they were on opposing ends of the same strong-willed base.

Where MJ was methodical and calculated, Y/N was rash and unpredictable. They were both the type to end up involved in sketchy situations, just at varying speeds and levels of grandeur. Y/N had her father to thank for that.

The iconic Tony Stark was not a pretender. He was who he was, loud and proud. He’d never apologized for it before—not even when he should’ve—and he probably never would. Y/N, on the other hand, had been pretending to be something she wasn’t for more than a decade.

He’d given her a choice when she was old enough for kindergarten. They talked about it, mapped out the pros and cons, and she made a decision. Soon after, she entered the outside world as Y/N Smith. It was the best thing her five year old brain could think of. Plus, she didn’t want her place on the alphabetical rosters to change.

She went to public schools—something Tony never missed an opportunity to mention he hated—and started paving her own way. Right now, that meant she was chasing a super-powered fight through the streets of Queens.

Since landing a highly sought after internship at The Daily Bugle, Y/N’s main priority had been impressing her overbearing bosses. That came with varying levels of complexity, depending on the superhero shenanigans of the month.

She rounded a corner into an alleyway, instantly ducking down when a blindingly bright object whizzed by her head. Her arms shot up in a protective motion as she leaned against the cool brick wall at her side. She remained there, frozen in place with a racing heart, for several seconds.

Something thumped to the concrete only a foot away from her crumpled frame, nearly making her jump out of her skin. She peeked through her arms, still crossed over her head, eyes widening as they landed on a pile of red and black fabric.

The lump groaned and slowly unraveled to reveal Queens’ favorite masked hero. He shook his head, the mechanical eyes of his suit twitching as if malfunctioning. Y/N was stuck in her spot, wide eyes hungrily drinking in every detail they could. Despite following his activity for months now, she’d never gotten this close to the mystery man.

His suit was tighter than she thought possible. It hugged his body in a way that left nothing to the imagination. The rippling muscles lining his torso were clearly visible beneath the thick material. She watched as he sat back on his heels and rubbed the side of his head, shoulders tensing as he seemed to finally realize that she was there.

“Whoa, hey.” Came his breathy, surprisingly high-pitched greeting. He cleared his throat before continuing, a steady hand extending her way. “Are you okay, miss?”

Y/N’s brow furrowed in curiosity, not missing the way his demeanor changed the moment he noticed her. It was like a flip switched. He’d turned on his superhero persona, a process she was unfortunately all too familiar with.

“I’m fine.” The words came out more forcefully than she’d intended, but she was all business now, too.

There was no way she was letting him out of her sight without getting some information. She wasn’t even worried about all the ways her bosses would kill her, she’d beat herself up enough for the missed opportunity. She ignored his hand, dusting her jeans off and hobbling to her feet before reaching for her phone to launch the recording app.

“Can I ask you a few questions, Spider-Man?” She jutted the phone out in front of her, and he took a step back as if the device would somehow hurt him.

The eyes on his mask widened, something she didn’t know was possible. “Oh. I...uh—”

Just then, the ground shook with a massive impact that couldn’t have been more than a block away. It would’ve knocked Y/N right off her feet if it weren’t for the gloved hand that shot out to stabilize her.

“Gotta go!”

By the time his hasty goodbye met her ears, he was gone. It took about ten seconds for Y/N to process what just happened before she took off running in the same direction he’d swung in. She was too far in to give up now. At this point, she’d settle for some shaky footage of the fight. It’d be enough to satisfy her editors for a few days.

She ran out in the street, stopping abruptly as a stampede of people swarmed her. Elbows and shoulders rammed into her sides as she tried fighting her way through the panic. 

“Oh, come on people! Chill the fuck out!” She found herself shouting to deaf ears. 

Maybe it was because she grew up immersed in the superhero way of life, or her bordering on unhealthy need to get some kind of story tonight, but either way she was aggravated by the public reaction more than anything.

She was rarely scared anymore, even when faced with imminent danger. Admittedly, she didn’t have a good gauge for when she might be getting herself into trouble. Another thing she blamed her father for. 

Her eyes remained trained on the sky, watching the fight unfold in mid-air. She cringed as Spider-Man nearly fell off the homemade-looking flying suit. He quickly regained his balance, shooting a web into one of the back engines. It immediately started sputtering as the metal clanked and caught in the sticky substance. 

They were going down, and fast. She knew this was probably her last chance to get any kind of discernable footage of the event, so she reached into her back pocket for her phone. It was at this moment that someone decided to shove into her so hard that she lost her footing and tumbled to the ground. 

A rush of air left her lungs as she hit the asphalt, hard. She couldn’t help but wince as pain shot up both of her arms. There would definitely be bruises she’d need to hide later. Thankfully, at least she ended up near the curb so she wasn’t instantly trampled to death by the screaming crowd. 

She pushed herself up into a sitting position and huffed, wiping away the tiny rocks that were now embedded into her palms. She was about to hobble to her feet and call tonight a wash when her eyes landed on a blueish-purple glow coming from a nearby alley.

Maybe she wouldn’t get any useable footage tonight, but a souvenir would lift her spirits and, hopefully, her credibility in the office. Without wasting anymore time, she stumbled to her feet and ducked into the darkness of the cramped space.

She followed the pulsating light, stopping only when her eyes landed on a small, metallic object. It had a thin silver cage protecting what looked like a gem or rock of some kind. Nothing too crazy, aside from the whole glowing thing. Her brows furrowed with curiosity as she crouched down to get a better view. 

She had absolutely no idea what it was, and she’d seen a lot of weird things in her dads workshop. The only thing she could compare it to was some of the alien technology that’d been leftover from the Battle of New York. She’d run a few stories about that herself, plus saw her dad tinkering with some things since Thor took Loki back to Asgard.

Figuring she could show it to him at the very least, she pulled the end of her sleeve over her hand and grabbed it. She let her bag slip off of her shoulder and quickly unzipped it before sliding the object inside. 

Just then, the sound of screeching metal filled her ears at a deafening volume. She managed to close her bag before covering her ears and ducking against the brick alley wall. The crowd still surrounding the area screamed in horror.

She watched with wide eyes as the huge bird-man landed on the rooftop just a few feet away from her crouched form. It was the closest she’d been to the masked—villain? She wasn’t sure—and he was far more intimidating than she’d first assumed.

His glowing beady green eyes didn’t so much as glance in her direction as he slung Spider-Man over the edge of the building, the tip of one of his wings wrapped around his throat.

An involuntary gasp tore through her chest.

It wasn’t that she was worried about the hero. For one, she knew he was more than capable of fending for himself. It wasn’t even that she cared if he got hurt. He was mostly an annoyance to her, his illusive nature making her job way harder than usual.

But if she knew one thing in this moment, it was that the bird-man was the bad guy, and she couldn’t let him win.

So, she did something really stupid.

She found the closest thing that she thought might actually do any kind of damage—which was, unfortunately, an old bike helmet next to the dumpster—and chucked it at the pair.

It hit one of the metal wings with a pathetic clink and all three of them froze.

Y/N held her breath as the man’s head turned in her direction slowly. Way too slowly. Like ‘I’m going to really enjoy killing you’ slowly.

After that, everything happened impossibly fast.

“Hey! Watch out!” 

She barely had time to recognize the panicked voice before she was flying. Her stomach flipped and she couldn’t even scream, overcome with sudden vertigo. She pinched her eyes shut the second she saw the top of a building and clutched onto whatever was carrying her away. 

If it was the weird bird guy, she accepted whatever evil plan he had. But, if it was Spider-Man, she was going to kill him.

It must’ve only been seconds before her feet touched solid ground, but it felt like an eternity to her. The moment she felt the stability beneath her, she began fighting against her captor.

“Let me go! Oh my god. If you don’t put me down right now—”

“What the hell—ow!”

Once she was free, she staggered away from him with a huff. She cleared the hair out of her eyes and bent over, resting her hands on her knees as she attempted to catch her breath. Her heart was pounding wildly and her stomach was still doing summer-salts.

She raised her eyes to send a withering glare toward the masked man. “Never do that shit again.”

He stared at her—at least she assumed—for a long moment before taking a step forward.

“What the hell was that? You could’ve gotten yourself hurt.” He gestured wildly with his hands, clearly agitated.

“That’s one way to thank me for saving your life.” Y/N ground out, sounding way more bitter than she would’ve liked.

“Saving my—” The eyes on his mask narrowed incredulously. “You did not save my life. All you did was distract me and put like ten other people in danger.”

She couldn’t help but scoff. “Please. Spare me the morality speech, Spider-Man. We both know you don’t bother worrying about people like me.”

Y/N was all too familiar with how superheroes think. When they’re in the middle of a fight, all they care about is winning. They usually have a bigger mission to accomplish. One that doesn’t concern itself with the lives left behind.

“People like you are all I worry about, trust me.”

With that harsh declaration, a heavy silence fell between them. Y/N clenched her jaw tightly, biting her tongue to prevent the floodgates from opening. Spider-Man wasn’t the only one who deserved her hostility toward superheroes, he just happened to be the one in front of her now.

Instead of speaking her mind, she turned on her heel and stalked away from him. At this point, it was late. The sun had set and her dad surely knew she wasn’t home when she promised. She had to accept that today just wasn’t her day and head back for some damage control.

Peter, feeling his chest tighten with regret for the way he’d snapped, followed closely behind her quick steps.

“Wait!” She actually stopped, something he wasn’t expecting, so he rammed right into her back. His hands quickly wrapped around her biceps as she spun around. “Sorry. I’m sorry. I, uh...”

He didn’t know what to say. This was the second time in one night he’d run into her, but he was still dumbstruck. The circumstances weren’t ideal. He thought he’d lost her earlier, but then she had to go and put herself in danger.

He took a step away from her, dropping his hands and rubbing at the back of his neck nervously. He had to remind himself that she had no idea who he was. Even if he did embarrass himself—like he usually did around her—she wouldn’t know it was him when they saw each other in the halls come Monday.

“At least let me get you home.” He insisted, feeling bad that he’d indirectly kept her out so late.

Y/N pursed her lips, immediately wanting to accept his offer but trying not to give too much away. Truthfully, she was exhausted. She just wanted to get home and deal with the fallout disobeying her curfew would bring so she could get some sleep.

“Alright.” She sighed, pulling anxiously at the straps of her bag. She knew this meant she’d have to swing through the streets again, something she wasn’t nearly ready to do.

Nevertheless, she allowed Spider-Man to walk toward her. She averted her eyes as he wrapped an arm around her back and tried not to let her breath catch when his gloved fingers skimmed the exposed skin of her lower back where her shirt had ridden up.

Warmth enveloped her as his proximity settled in. Under his mask, Peter’s face was burning. This was by far the closest he’d been to his classmate. Or any girl, actually. Not wanting to think about it for a second longer, he shot a web toward a nearby building and followed the directions Y/N yelled out.

Within minutes, they landed on the helipad outside her front door.

Peter felt his stomach drop with realization once he let his eyes wander around the outside of the huge building.

“Oh my god. Is this seriously where you live?” He cleared his throat after squeaking out the question, not necessarily wanting to give away his shock.

“What?” Y/N scoffed teasingly. “Don’t I look like a spoiled rich girl?”

“That’s not—I wasn’t—” He didn’t know what he was trying to say, honestly. There were endless questions flitting through us mind at warp speed.

If she lived here, at the Avengers Tower, did that mean she was one of them? And he just hadn’t met her yet? Or did she work for Mr. Stark? But she was so young. He guessed she could be an assistant or something. Maybe she worked for Pepper? Or Happy? Or, she could—

Y/N rolled her eyes, deciding to spare him the embarrassment of sputtering any more. “My dad is famous...like helped form the Avengers famous.”

Peter’s mind went blank. He wasn’t expecting that.

“Cap?” It was the first name to spill out of his mouth. “Wait, can he even have kids?”

Y/N couldn’t help the giggle that escaped her at his assumption. “He totally can, but no.”

“Oh.” The gears of his brain started turning again and realization slowly dawned on him. He felt his throat run dry as his eyes widened behind his mask. “Oh.”

Shit. This was way worse. He couldn’t believe he had no idea who she really was. Sure, she used a different last name at school, but he should’ve seen the resemblance sooner.

“Look, I know you two have worked together.” Y/N sighed, thinking back to all those weeks her dad was gone fighting Steve and the rest of his friends for no real reason. “Can you just...not tell him about this?”

Peter’s brows furrowed in confusion. Why wouldn’t she want Mr. Stark knowing that she’d been with him?

Either way, he agreed, since he had a favor to ask of his own. “Only if you won’t.”

She gave him this dumbfounded look, and he knew he had to elaborate.

“He made me this suit before the whole thing with Captain America, so I thought he would keep giving me missions, but now it’s been months and he won’t return my calls. I’m lucky if I get through to Happy. He doesn’t want me getting involved in this stuff, so...”

It struck Y/N then how weird it was to hear a superhero talk about her family so casually. It didn’t seem possible that the two of them were in the same circles. Sure, she’d practically grown up with a few of the world’s most famous heroes, but somehow Spider-Man was different.

He was local. And elusive. A pure mystery to her.

“What exactly is this stuff?” She thought back to the weird glowing object in her bag, having almost forgotten it was there.

“I don’t know.” Peter shook his head, seemingly defeated. “I thought it was just neighborhood stuff, but those guns...I’ve never seen anything like it.”

“Alien tech.” Y/N said without hesitation, although she wasn’t actually positive that’s what it was. “My dad has some in his workshop. It was leftover from the Battle of New York.”

“How does it work?” Peter found himself asking excitedly, easily pushing all the other revelations from this conversation to the back of his mind.

“I don’t know.” She admitted, looking away from him as her chest tightened with emotion. “I’ve never gotten close enough to any of it to see. He likes to keep me out of things too...”

It was at that moment, as a breath of silence settled between them, that they realized she was still in his arms. Y/N’s face erupted with heat and she quickly pushed herself away from him. Once her feet were back on the ground, they both stepped backward to create some much needed distance.

“I, ah...better get back...”

“Yeah, yeah. I have to go too...”

They looked at each other for a few long moments. It was at if neither of them truly wanted to separate, but knew they had to. It was clear, though, that they’d just formed some kind of connection.

Y/N felt something strange—and wildly inappropriate—brewing in her chest. A certain kind of attraction toward the masked hero she’d never considered before. It appalled her, honestly. It wasn’t like she hated the guy, but she certainly didn’t like him. And she had no idea who he was. He could be eight years old, for all she knew.

With that realization, she turned on her heel and stalked down the narrow entrance to the Avengers Tower, her face still burning. She heard the thwip of Spider-Man’s webbing and knew he’d be gone if she looked back. So she didn’t.

She pressed her hand against the touchpad outside the front door and quickly slipped inside once it recognized her prints. She sighed heavily and let herself fall back against the door, the comfort of home enveloping her.

The peace was short lived, however, as she caught sight of her mother waiting expectantly behind the bar to her left. With a glass of red wine in hand, her knowing gaze shifted from the helipad outside to Y/N’s stiff frame.

She took a slow sip, eyes narrowing over the rim of the glass.

“You’re so grounded.”

———————————————————————

let me know what you think!! should I continue this series??

[blitzturtles]

Title: It Goes Like This (It Starts Like This Universe)

Rating: Teen and Up

Fandom: JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Vento Aureo

Pairing(s): BruAbba

Summary: Abbacchio isn’t a morning person. Never has been. He prefers the comfort that comes with a blanket of darkness to the bright hours of the early morning. There’s less eyes. Less people. Less performance. Unfortunately, he’s gone and fallen in love with a man that believes that the day begins before the sun has even broken the horizon.

Notes: This is for the first place to my 300 Follower Giveaway! @bucciaratisfishmarket requested BruAbba set in my It Starts Like This verse with some disabled slice of life/morning routine. Ngl, I was super excited to get to do something in this verse, so thank you!

Thank you to everyone that followed and participated, and a special thanks to @bucciaratisfishmarket! I hope you like your fic!

Additional Notes: Also, the pill organizer described in the fic can be found on Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/listing/1022344896/boneyard-real-bones-weekly-7-day-pill It's cool and beautiful, and I probably don't do it justice. Definitely go check it out!

-

Abbacchio isn’t a morning person. Never has been. He prefers the comfort that comes with a blanket of darkness to the bright hours of the early morning. There’s less eyes. Less people. Less performance. Unfortunately, he’s gone and fallen in love with a man that believes that the day begins before the sun has even broken the horizon. It’s leftover from Bruno’s days helping his father with the boat, and, later, his days running Polpo’s errands. Chasing people down for money and answers. What comfort Abbacchio can find in the night, Bruno can find just fine in the light hours of the morning.

Fortunately for both of them, Abbacchio is more than capable of running on a schedule, of waking up at the same time everyday and forcing his mind and body into cooperation. He did it for years for school and then the academy. It’s nothing he isn’t used to, and he’s happiest when Bruno is happy, no matter what that entails, which is how he finds himself waking up to Bruno’s second alarm before the man can snooze it again.

The thing about Bruno’s new medication—a pill large in size and equally ridiculous in the length of its name—is that it makes it damn near impossible for him to get going in the morning the way he used to. Before, Bruno practically operated on his own internal clock. Waking up before his alarm had even gone off and fetching them both their first cup of caffeine; it used to be the thing that made greeting the day a bit more tolerable.

Now, Bruno snoozes. Alarm after alarm, until they run out. He’s tried music, absurd volumes, and even relocating the damned clock halfway across the room. None of it helps, so Leone compensates. He wakes up around the second or third alarm, turns the rest off, and kisses Bruno’s cheek before he rolls out of bed.

Sometimes there’s a quiet plea, “five more minutes”, that endears Abbacchio so completely that his mood settles, not nearly as bitchy as he could be upon reaching the kitchen and finding someone else already there.

“Why are you awake?” Okay, so. Still bitchy. But he doesn’t sneer his words quite as bad.

Narancia, for his part, looks completely startled by the prospect of someone else existing at such an ungodly hour, but he manages to avoid outright screaming. That’s a plus. Abbacchio isn’t sure his head could take it this early. “What are you doing?”

“I asked first.”

Narancia narrows his eyes, but he caves within seconds. “I got a test in like two hours, and Fugo’s gonna kill me if I don’t pass.”

Abbacchio snorts at the idea, “Yeah, he will.”

“Not helping!”

“Never said I planned to,” Abbacchio points out as he starts rummaging through the cabinets for two mugs. He sets them on the counter and gets to work brewing their coffee. Decaf these days, for Bruno’s sake. Abbacchio could keep drinking his usual, but he takes solace in the bitter taste of his coffee instead. It seems kinder that way, especially when he knows how much Bruno’s been struggling without caffeine.

“Why are you awake?”

“I’m always awake this early,” next is breakfast, which is easier said than done. It’s rare that Abbacchio wakes up with a stomach for anything. Too many years of skipping breakfast in favor of a bottle did a number on him, but it’s not optional anymore. Neither one of them will be able to keep their meds down without something to eat, so he picks through the refrigerator until he comes up with fruit and yogurt as his best solution.

“Really?” Narancia asks, wrinkling his nose, “Why?”

“Ask Bruno,” Abbacchio says, dismissive. He’s really not in the mood to talk to people that aren’t currently snoozing in his bed.

“You’re not much fun in the morning.”

“Am I ever?”

“Touché.”

Abbacchio snorts. He should be offended, but he knows the kid is being a smartass. It’s his own fault for setting himself up. “Why don’t you go bother Fugo? I’m sure he’ll be happy to help you study.”

“Have you ever tried waking Fugo up?”

“No, can’t say that I have.” That’s always been Bruno’s job, assuming that Fugo hadn’t already woken up on his own.

“It’s too early to get stabbed.”

“Touché.”

They go back and forth for a while longer. At least until Abbacchio’s patience runs out, and he’s finished putting breakfast together. He dismisses himself with little warning and doesn’t feel the least bit guilty when the kid looks a little startled by the abruptness of his departure. He has things to get done for the day, and those things don’t necessarily include being part of Narancia’s obvious effort to procrastinate.

“Bruno,” Abbacchio calls when he steps back into their room after Moody opens the door for him. “Your five minutes are up.”

“Five more?” Bruno asks, voice muffled. His head is barely visible with only a tuft of hair sticking out from a pile of blankets. It’s cute, and Abbacchio is a complete sucker for giving in.

“Last one, tesoro,” Abbacchio warns as he sets Bruno’s cup and food down on the bedside table.

There’s a muffled reply that might be a quiet thanks, though it’s almost impossible to tell with the way Bruno pulls the blankets even tighter around himself.

Abbacchio rummages through the drawer of his nightstand until he finds what he’s looking for before taking up a spot at the end of the bed with his food and drink in hand. He sips at the decaf slowly, wrinkling his nose at the first taste. God, he misses caffeine. As expected, he doesn’t feel much better about his first bite of homemade parfait (and he can almost hear Polnareff’s protest at his calling it that). The rest goes down about the same, but the motion is mechanical at that point. One bite after the other with the occasional sip from his mug to wash it all down until everything is gone.

Abbacchio sets the dishes on the floor and reaches for the pill organizer sitting on the bed beside him. He absently runs his fingers over the lid, where small bones have been set in resin. He can still remember the first time he saw it. The black shine had caught his eye first, but, on closer examination, the thing that had convinced him to buy the organizer had been the mouse bones, delicately placed and striking against the background.

What he hadn’t realized then is that the little organizer would a significant adjustment to his daily routine. Having a week’s worth of medication in one place, already sectioned in dosed amounts, had significantly increased his medication compliance. Oddly enough, it’s had a rather hefty impact on his overall mental health. Now, when anti-inflammatories and bronchodilators and steroids are part of his daily regiment as much as his SSRI’s, it’s even more vital for him to consistently get his meds in. Otherwise, the consequences tend to be pneumonia and an unwanted hospital trip with a round of antibiotics and even stronger steroids. And that’s to say nothing of what happens when he’s running low on serotonin.

He’s caught up in his own thoughts when Bruno hooks his chin over his shoulder and peers down at the little organizer.

“I never did ask you if those are real,” Bruno muses quietly.

“I thought you were taking five more.”

“‘m awake,” Bruno answers, clearly half-asleep.

Abbacchio huffs a soft, amused laugh. He turns his head to press a kiss to the side of Bruno’s nose. “Sure you are, amore.”

“I am.”

“M’hm,” Abbacchio smiles, reflecting the expression on Bruno’s face, though his is notably less sleep-depressed. Bruno looks a lot like a light gust of wind might knock him out, and it’s so damn endearing that Abbacchio can barely handle it. Instead, he looks back down at the pill organizer and answers Bruno’s earlier question, “They are. Real, I mean.”

“They’re lovely,” Bruno says, and he means it. Odd as some might find Abbacchio’s taste, Bruno has always found beauty in it. “Perhaps I should get one.”

“Might be a good idea.” It would be easier to see if Bruno ever missed a dose, and it would certainly be easier to avoid that disaster all together. “There are other options. You could go with something—oceanic, maybe?”

Bruno hums at the thought. “I think I’d like that.”

“I’ll keep an eye out,” by which Abbacchio means that he’ll actively go looking for one. Anything to make Bruno’s life a touch easier.

“Oh, you brought breakfast,” Bruno says, moving away from Abbacchio to peer curiously at the morning’s offerings. “You’re entirely too kind.”

Abbacchio huffs a laugh at that, “For all that you’ve done for us? Hardly.” He pops open the side hatch of his organizer and dumps the day’s pills into his hand. Abbacchio pulls a face at the number of them and looks down at his mug. Right, he had meant to save a sip.

“Here,” Bruno offers his own with a smile. “We’ll get more in a bit.”

“If you’re sure...” Abbacchio could always go get his own, but he has a feeling that doing so will result in more small talk, and he’s not quite up for that yet.

“I am,” Bruno reassures him before taking up the bowl of yogurt and fruit in absence of his coffee. “Just leave enough for me to take mine.”